davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1913-08-27
TELEGRAPH TABLOIDs

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United Press Leased Wire Service ]
BETHLEHEM, N. Y, Aug. 81
Major Rich Muckle OF Philadelphia,
who has suffered from hay fever for
seventy-five years was banquetted as
the oldest sneezer' by twenty-five
fellow feverites.
Led a Dogs Life.
HOBOKEN, N. j., Aug. 27.-Mrs.
Ahrens pawned her engage
ment ring to- buy poison, wrote ner
husband he treated her like dog
ard now is dead.
Detective Ahead $50.
NEW YORK, Aug. 27.Police Com
missioner Waldo gave detective $3.50
marked money to trap him. When
arrested the money was gone. Waldo
had no proof Of the loan" and the
detective was released.
champagne treat.
NEW YORK, Aug. 27.-On wire
less order from Emperor Franz loser,
914 Hungarian and Austrian immt
grants on an incoming vessel were
treated to champagne. 1t was the
emperor's birthday.
Stolen Money Returned.
NEW YORK, Aug. 27-Prof Jas.
Cunningham OF st. Francis Xevier col
lege went into a saloon to talk poll
tics with home students and was rob
bed of $1,000. Later 1t was returned
Afraid Of War.
WICHITA, Kans., Aug. 27.-Fearing
that there may be war with Mexico,
David G. Taylor, 26, recent recruit TO
the state militia has written Presi-
dent Wilson asking for a discharge
Feels Like a Goat.
CHICAGO, Aug. 81. One beer
makes me think I'm goat" saio
Jerry Hanton, arrested while trying
to butt down lamp post.
She Wore No Stockings.
ST. LOUIS, Aug. 27.-There was a
near riot on Grand avenue when Il
pretty girl with skirt slit to the
knee revealed the fact that she wore
no stockings.
An Acre Day.
LOGANSPORT. Ind, Aug. 27.-Mar.
vim Brown. suing for divorce, says he
offered his wife an acre for every day
she didn't nag him.
Police were Alarmed.
PITTSBURGH, Pa, Aug. 27.-Emn
Abrahams, arrested for being intox,,
Gated, set an alarm clock SO he would
be called for trial Police thought il
a burglar alarm and turned out en-
masse.
Parrot Yelled "Fire!.
PITTSBURGH, Aug. 81. Fire.
screeched parrot, and a blaze in the
basement OF an apartment house was
put out with loss of 10000
Cup Full Of Money.
WASHINGTON. Aug. 27.-Havine
given Walter Johnson big silver cup
filed with money, fans here are now
subscribing to fund for Geo. Nc,
Bride, the Senator's captain.
ORIGINAL NOTICE.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1913-08-27
Feels Like a Goat.

FeeI6 EIKe GOAT.
CHICAGO, Aug. 81. One beer
makes me think I'm a goat" saio
Jerry Hanton, arrested while tryinr
to butt down lamp post.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1913-08-27
She Wore No Stockings.

ST. LOUIS, Aug. 27.-There was a
near riot on Grand avenue when a
pretty girl with a skirt slit to the
knee revealed the fact that she wore
no stockings.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1913-08-27
An Acre a Day.

LoGANSPoRT, Ind, Aug. 27-Mar-
vim Brown, suing for divorce. says he
offered his wife an acre for every day
she didn't nag him.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
CAROLINA MEETS
GEORGIA TODAY
Many of Mainstays OF Tarheel
Team Laid Off by
Injuries.
fsDecial to mo Ti.nes.D,en,t,,h

(,pttit! 10 1 ne lines piSpatCn.J
Chapel Hill, y. G.. October I'll
Twenty-Five members OF Cardinals
football squad left Chapel Hill THIS
afternoon FOR Athens where on Satur-
d,y North Carolina and Georgia viii
stage one OF the big gridiron contests
OF ths south. tho Vanderbilt Virginia
game alone attracting creator atten-
ton. Carolsnas squad VIII arrive on
me scene OF tho battlo early to-mor-
row morning, permitting res, from tho
long Journey before the fray.
Though tho Tarhecls are rot antici.
patinS overwhelming defeat, some un-
easiness disturbs It's cump. for reason
OF tile poor physical condition In which
the gamo VIII and many OF its regular
mainstays. Several or tho regulars
VIII be debarred from participating in
The contest altogether, among the
number icing Captain Aherncthy, who
dtd not take tho trip. An untrloa
quarter back will figure in the array.
Long. member OF the second team.
starting that position the regulars
being deharrcd by injuries and bruises.
IN spite OF this gloomy outlook, much
interest Is rlveted on this gano from
North Cardinals viewpoint. as from
mo outcome many viii seek 10 deduct
ne comparative strength OF North
Carolina and Virginia
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
MANY GAMES TO-DAY
on SOUTHERN FIELDS
Results Should Afford Reasonably Good Basis of
Comparison Of Relative Strength of Teams
Contestlng for Football Supremacy

sosaon q date. An added feature wlil
&c several intersoct,onal games
Tho Harvard Cornell gan.o at Cam
bridge stands forth a. rho leading
Eastern gridlron event. The uudctoat-
Cd Crimson combination appears to
stand SUPERIOR TO tho Ithaca men.
Cornell. already defeated by Carlisle
and Pittsburgh, - expected to mako
q valiant battle. bur viii face a well
nigh perfect machine at Cambridge.
Tho Yale team also win face a
worthy opponent in tho strong Colgate
Aggregation, and viii have to play its
pest TO wiu dccisiVely over tho col
icgiarS from Hamilton, X Y. Colgate
- represented by 4 really strong team.
Princeton. IN playing Holy CT 1859,
wiii face team ALREADY defeated by
Harvard, ~ to Z, and Yale, o TO 0.
That Princeton should VIII is conceded.
TIC came holds truo OF the Pennsyl,
NauiI Pennsylvania state game seized
uled ter ItAnklin Field. This season
appears 20 be an on one FOR Pcnnsyl-
Nanig state
The United States Military Academy
team W!li act rs a strenuous host TO
the Not-e Dame, Ind, eleven The
Western brigade has been playing A
tast open game this season, and in fac
ing tile Army. wiil have an excellent
opportunity 10 display tho style OF
football popular in The Aliddlu Nest.
I'M tho Army they Will lind a team
we'll Norsol IN up-to-date Eastern or
icusive and defensive tactics. For this
reason, the test OF tho two SYSTEMS
viii be awaited with as much Interest
- tho outcome of the Syracuse Mich
is scheduled
In the southern section OF tho East
ern GriGlron world. two games OF
prominence stand out IN tho Carlisle
GEORGETOWN contest, q, WASHINGTON
and tho Navy .Lchieh clash nj Anna
polls. Tho Lchigh team does not ap.
parently class with the powerfui Nav,
team while the general play of the
Indians has been such aa point to then
as the logical winners q tho gam.
with GEORGETOWN
The principal games and the 1871.
scores, where the came colleges mo
last season. follows:
Cornell at Harvard. no game
Colgate at Yale no game.
iiolv Cross at Princeton, no game
PENNSYLVANIA State at Pennsylvania
Il 10 Q.
Ne,ro Dame 1T Army. no game.
LehiEh at Navy. IL TO o.
Carlisle at Georgetown. - 10 20
Swarthmorc at Johns Hopkins
/ 20 TO 6.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
SPIDERS AND TIGERSIN
GRIDIRON CONTEST
Richmond College Eleven to Meet the Sturdy Hamp-
den-Sldney Team at Broad Street Park This
Afternoon at o Clock-Spiders Had Light
Workout and SIGNAL Practice Yesterday

rho Richmond College Spiders ard
the tamnden- Sidney Tigers will mix
up IN q championship game OF football
this afternoon ut Broad stree; Park
The Eamo Win sta:t promptly at {
o'clock, and i Jard-fough, contest may
bc expected
An yesterday afternoon was spent in
signal practice ANA q general light
workout hy the Spiders. They arc well
satisfied "ith the result of their hard
practice, and VIII try 10 put IL on tho
Tigers in good style There are SOW
oral plays that they hope to pull on at
the EXPENSE or the Wild and woody
Tigers thls afternoon. and the shit
play viii help towards getting few
penalties Every man on the eleven
has kept himself under constant train
iiE Tor tho last two weeks and good
~ sure to come from IT Most OF the
players are seasoned men. ana know
the game, ana they viii put forth ALI
or their knowledge OF football against
their opponents.
Richmond College students can boas II
Of their football squad this year, Tor
tho reason tina; II Is Il better one than
tho college has had hcrctoforc Tor
years. Every man knows hts position
and what IS expected OF him, thanks
10 the good and hard work ~ Coach
bobson, who since the opening OF the
season. has been ON their tecls and
pushing them hard. and they have rc
epondcd Ike true soldiers To their gu
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
SEVERE DRUBB|NC
GIVEN TO PUBLIC

Iaton!a. Ky, October 31-The public
was given severe drubbing to-day mt
me Latonla course. when six straight
We're bowled over with such marked
regularity that II fairly took the breath
away from the talent Tho long shot
gan with Mcsah. WHO won the omen
ing event at $lo760 for n g. ticket. and
roundod up the day by landing on
cral particular upsets during the after
noon in horses showing big improve
'ncntS over their last races. those In
particular being j II. Barry, in tho
third race. and Billy Baker, in tho
closing event Milton Il. captured tho
fourth and feature event OF the day
n head
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
FOOTBALL CLASSIC
OF SOUTH TO-DAY AT
CHARLOTTESVILLE
Sturdy Sons of Old Dominion to Meet Vanderbilt
Huskies in Their Fifth Glidiron Battle-Hun-
dreds of Alumni Return to Cheer Alma
Mater On to Victo1y--Both Teams in
Fit Condition for the Fray

boon report prior TO tho Georgia NON
iiict That some OF the mon wero o,Lr-
trained. had gone u triflc stale, but that
is over now. Tho grind of that battle
and tho unexpected closcncss of tho
scorS' from whatever cause. gavo Rice
warren something 10 think about. and
re lfroitteo through his thoughts Ham
mond Johnson. who has been here II,
Week helping coach the back field, said
Tonight that If Virginia WAS defeated
~ Woub be Tho biggest surprise IN his
football career. Others equally as Wen
posted voiced tho same opinion. Vie
tory - not only wanted victory ia ev-
pccted tNSht down at tho bottom OF
Their hearts the student body feels that
when CAPTAIN Garter leads his ten frl
lowers On Lambeth Field tomorrow
10 game will hc over. instead of Just
begun
New Plays In Use.
There arc any number of now plovs
that VIII be new even to the under
graduates. They have been practirca
IN secret Over tho telephone tonight
ltlco Warren said that he was not SAN
sumo, though he believed that he had
me Deter team NlcGugin has his men
IN LNnchburS or ut some intermediate
point. and could not DO reached over
the telephone.
Ito VIII arrive with the Commodores
a, ~ O'clock tomorrow ana viii take
ariil, the field having boon offered him
pE Virginia. All reports from his calnp
i4dlctie That with tho exception Of The
hiS tackle Brown. who was severely
injured IN the Michigan encounter and
WI De out. tho men arc prtmed for
IN" battle OF their lives.
Aitoseiher the game should be n his
! tory maker from u purely technical
standpoint While there viii bc :: :,
.Ms 5 disparity in ,hr weights OF the
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
HARVARD AND PRINCETON
NAY AKKA\CE RECATTA
lsp-cit,l ID The rimss D.spntch.I

Cambridge, Mass. October 9i.--The IIar-
vard and princeton rowing psnagsmenta
are nov discussing tho probability Of a re-
gdtth between the naNics Of both colleges to
bc roWed III Lake Carnegie next May. Tho
Tigers have come 10 Cambridge TWO sea-
sons Ia succession. Last spring they en-
denvorcd to get The Crimson onfsmen 10 70
- Pfihceton, but Harvard refused. because
ne crew had aireany ooohed races against
This sp'inE Cornell visits this city Thu.
rises Coach Wrays charges an open date
away from home and an announcement Of a
Harvard Princoton set OF races Is looked .oy
next month.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01
Gnmc. on Eastern l.lclh..

New York October Eastern
football aelds VIII be tho scenes OF
some interesting collegiate games to-
morrow, although mono VIII rise to tho
plane of 4 championship contest
Constituted IN broad sense, however.
the 3ay's eridircn clashes are the
most pretertious and promising Of tho
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-11-01

perior officer While he has been a
good coach. aud with plenty Of pa.
ticnce. he has been stern 10 the extent
into action
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
GOOD MEN ARE DISSATISFIED
Feel That They Don't Measure Up to Own Standards Every Day
 In Week.

So you feel that you're failure because you don't measure up to your own standards, every day In the week
 Buck up. brother! That's the way all good, go-ahead men feel some times!
 If they weren't dissatisfied with their performances as well as their promises, they'd be trotting around in a circle; and that means business dry rot, If anyone asks you.
 A certain amount of self-dissatisfac- tion is the best tonic in the world for the genus, man. It keeps him from broodin' on bein' 8 man-like David Harums bitten dog, you know!
 AS long as you can find fault with yourself and your works, you're alive, my friend.
 When you get to the point where you feel sorry for other men because they aren't such good salesmen, or managers. or presidents-or porters as you, then is the time for the doc. tor to put you on diet and prescribe perfect quiet-to keep you from go ing crazy about yourself!
 Don't get the glooms over self-dis. trust. Ambition and dissatisfaction are half brothers. anyway! - Ex. change
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
LITTLE JOKE BY SKlMPS
Backed His Statement With Money, but Was Compelled to
 Compromise.

Speaking of bantam chickens.' re- marked Skimps, when the conversa- ton turned to poultry, T have hen whose eggs are so small that l put three dozen of them in a collar-box the other day"
 Give him the Ananias club medal" shouted the rest, in chorus.
 Have any of you gentlemen money with which to back your doubts of my veracity?"
 T have a couple of dollars" replied Gaswell.
 So have l, added Dukane.
 Good enough! I'll cover both of those bets"
 Very well. Now show us those eggs in that collar box"
 Well l can do it if you insist, but perhaps it may not be necessary"
 "Of course it's necessary, You don't expect to win our money with out proof do you?"
 Not at all, but l merely wish to observe that it was a horse-collar box l put the eggs in
 With some difficulty the matter was compromised, and Skimps was warned that the next break of that kind would cost him his life
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
CHILDREN LOVE
 SYRUP IF F|GS
1t is cruel to force nauseatinq, harsh physic into a
 sick child.

Look back at your childhood days. Remember the dose" mother insisted on-castor oil, calomel, cathartics. How you hated them, how you fought against taking them.
 With our children it's different. Mothers who cling to the old form of physic simply don't realize what they do. The children's revolt is well.found. ed. Their tender little "insldes" are injured by them.
 If your childs stomach, liver and bowels need cleansing, give only deli. cious California Syrup of Figs" It's action is positive, but gentle. Millions of mothers keep this harmless fruit laxative" handy; they know children love to take it; that it never fails to clean the liver and bowels and sweet. en the stomach, and that a teaspoonful given today saves a sick child tomor. row.
 Ask at the store for a 50-cent bottle of California Syrup of Figs" which has full directions for babies, children pf all ages and for grown-ups plainly on each bottle Aov.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
PAINFUL ECZEMA ON HANDS

Bienville, La.-"I was troubled with eczema in my hands for several years The skin would break and look like it had been cut with a knife and my hands were so sore l could hardly bear to put them in water and could hardly use them. When l used them the blood would run out. They would heal little and then they would get worse than ever again. They were very painful. The eczema got to breaking out on my arms in pimples which itched and burned very badly.
 ''I used different remedies, also used all kinds of facial creams and --- on my hands and arms and I did not get any relief until 1 used Cuticura Soap and Ointment, 1 cured my hands and eczema with Cuticura Soap and Ointment" (Signed) Miss Fannie Mostiller, Oct. 5, 1912.
 Cuticura Soap and Ointment sold throughout the world Sample of each free, with 32-p. Skin Book. Address post. card "Cuticura, Dept. L, Boston. Adv.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
What Doctor Can Beat This?

In less than three months a phy- sician of Portland Me- has treated professionally five patients represent ing five successive generations of the same family, beginning with a cente- marian and following in the direct line of descent down to her great-great- grandson. He first attended the old lady, who was ninety-nine years old, for senile gangrene, resulting in her death. During her illness he was called on to prescribe for her daugh- ter, aged seventy-five. Next this daughters son, q florist, aged fifty, fell Ill and required attention. Fol lowing him son, a clerk of twenty seven, found himself in need of medi- cal aid. And lastly to the clerks wife was born male child, whom the doc tor was called upon to assist into the world, as he had been summoned to ease the great-great grandmother's exit from 1t barely three months be fore.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Tickled a Mule

Little Paul Porpare had heard the mules laugh, or at least make noises that sounded like laughter, and so when he saw a sad-faced jack stand ing loose near a stable at Cypress avenue and Troutman street, Brook lyn, he decided 1t should be cheered up. Little Paul-he Is five years old and lives at 3l Wyckoff avenue-got a straw and tickled the mules ear The mule sort of grinned and shook it's head but didn't hee-haw. Then little Paul tried again. This time the mule whirled about quickly, raised his heels and the next sounds that little Paul heard were the clang of an ambulance bell and the hee-haw of the mule. com bined. The surgeon from the German hospital bandaged up Pauls face and hands, upon which he had slid along the street after alighting Then his mother took him home.-New York World
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
HER STATEMENTS
 DESERVE NOTICE
Mrs. Walls Makes Public Some In- teresting Facts Which Should
 Interest All Women.

Leinarts, Tenn.-Mrs. Martha Walls Of this town, makes the following statements for publications: "I feel it my duty to tell you what your medi. cine, Cardui, the woman's tonic, has done for me.
 For four (4) years I suffered ter. ribly with womanly troubles, and 1 found no relief in different medicines which l took Finally, l began to take Cardui, the womans tonic, and after taking six bottles I am completely cured. l feel like a different person altogether. All the pains are gone and am in better health than I have been in for four years. Have gained a great deal in weight.
 l still take Cardui as a tonic My husband, as well as myself, cannot praise 1t too highly.
 l hope this letter will induce other poor, suffering women 10 try Cardui for it Is the best medicine in the world for women"
 If you suffer from any of the numer. ous ailments so common to all women why not take this lady's advice. and try Cardui? It has helped her, as well as a million other women in the past half century. Why shouldn't 1t do the same for you? We feel sure it will.
 Reading of Mrs Walls helpful ex perience should encourage you to try what this medicine will do for you.
 Get bottle of Cardui from your druggist to-day. You won't regret it.
 N. B.-Wyife 10. Chattanooga Medicine Co.,. Ladies Advisory Dept, Chattanooga. Tenn, for St<cia| ISfrHcEion5 on your case and 64 page book Home Treatment for Women." sent in plain wrapper. Adv.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Gentle Hint.

Pardon me" said the waiter. but believe that newspaper you are read ing is yesterdays"
 The patient guest sighed.
 "Mayhap, mayhap!" he replied, but it was today's I am sure-when gave you my order"
 But the serying-person, being der matologically prepared for such re marks, refused to hurry.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Another Case.

Philadelphia, Pa. Lydia E. Pink hams Vegetable Compound is all you claim it to be. About two or three days before my periods I would get bad backaches, then pains in right and left sides, and my head would ache. called the doctor and he said had organic in f1ammation. Iwent to him for while but did not get well so took Lydia E. Pink hams Vegetable Compound. After talk ing two bottles V-as relieved and finally my troubles left me. I married and have two little girls. have had no re- turn of the old troubles. Mrs. CHAs.
 BoELL, 2650 s. Chadwick St, Phila., Pa.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Stoppina the Wind.

In the village church during the morning service the organist was an moved because the organ-blower kept working the lever noisily after he had finished playing A famous preacher had come down from London to preach. The organist scribbled a note to the blower, and sent it round by d choir boy, who. misunderstood. ing his instructions, put it into the hands of the preacher. The note was as follows Perhaps you will kindly stop when l tell you to, The people have come here to hear my music, not your noise.'
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Fathers Neat Rehuke

This is story told of an old Evan gelical clergyman who had son in orders. The young man became a full-blown Ritualist On one occasion the father paid visit to his son, who asked him to preach in his church. For some time the old man refused, but pressed to do so, he at length consented. and chose the text, Lord, have mercy upon my son, for he is d lunatic."
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31

gton.-Receipt of hundreds of applications for campai@n badges which the War Department announced would be awarded the regulars or vo,- unteer soldiers prompted the depart ment to announce that no applications should be made until January 1. The mint will not be prepared O issue the medals before that time. Soldiers who served during the Civil, Indian ana sHanish wars. Philippine lasurroctior Chinese Relief Expedition, and other campaigns. are eligible ,o receive the decorations.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31

Pinkham's Vegetable Compound adver- tised, I tried it. My health improved wonderfully and l am now quite well again. No woman suffering from fe- male ills will regret it if she takes this medicine. Mrs. JAMES G. LECLEAR 836 Hunt St, Detroit, Mich.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Mo Meed fnr Mara

Giles met an acquaintance on the street the other day, although he artfully tried 10 avoid him
 Hello, Giles, deah boy" exclaimed the other. So glad to see you, I'm going to London next week. Can l do anything flaw your"
 No. goings enough, thanks" replied Giles. moving Lippincotts.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Quips and Oulddltles

A soldier crossing the barracb square with pail met a sergeant
 who noticed that Pat was wearing 3 very disreputable pair of trousers In tending to report him for unsoldierly appearance. he stopped him and asked: Where are you going" "Tc get some water, sor," answered Pat What in those trousers?" No, sir In the pail. Saturday Evening Post
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
DOCTORS DID
 NOT HELP HER
But Lydia E. Pinkham's Veg etable Compound Restored Mrs. LeClear's Health
 Her Own Statement.
Detroit, Mich. -"I am glad to dis cover a remedy that relieves me from

m y suffering a n d pains. For two years l suffered bearing down pains and got all run down. was under a nervous 8 strain and could not sleep at night 1 went to doctors here in the city but they did not do me any good.
 " Seeing Lydia F.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Her Reward.

50 Miss Lorena Lingerlong is to be married at last?"
 Yes; she has finally lived down all competition. Judge.
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
N aturally.

"On what lines is this piscatorial magazine rum"
 On fishing lines What else?"
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Pain in Back and Rheumatism

are the daily torment of thousands. To eff fectuaily cure these troubles you must re move the cause Foley Kidney Pills begin to work for you from the first dose, and ex- ert SO direct and beneficial an action in the kidneys and bladder that the pain and tor ment of kidney trouble soon disappears
The Forrest City times., 1913-10-31
Associated Profits

'Is he good player?"
 Well, when he handles poker, you just ought to see him shovel in money"