Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1913-11-11
Eating or Dining Z?

Eating or Dining2
To-day Lucia came to me all ag'ow
with az important discovery to impart:
"Cau 1t be that 1t 10 only In our own
family and at our own table that our
mental differences are so plainly accen-
tuated and set fOrth?"
"Where were you last night" l asked
with the privilege Of An old acqusint-
ance, ibid you take dnnsr at Laid
"Well," she replied with smile, II
cannot say that took dinner or that
merely ate with them, for realize that
It was more than just eating, 1t was din.
ing in tho fullest sense of the word.
For there's difference"
"That sounds Interesting" interpos.
ed, "come, tell me more about this eat
ing or dining, rather"
"Psrhaps I'm mistaken, but consider
that one cannot bs said to dine when the
tablecloth 10 crooked, and the center
piece not above reprOach, and no How
ere, not even tiny bunch OF them, and
everyone OF the family talking their own
hobby at table, as 1t is at home. NY
brothers talk athletics. and the feminine
members talk dress, mostly; father 10
usually silent, and We never seem TO
have one thought in common as fam.
ily. II I start to tell an snecdote, that
think might be an agreeable change, no.
body listens, or ! find that they have
raced through the meal and are leaving
the table.
"Well, last night at Laidiey's every
thing was different; the table was WE'LL
ordered and appointed, though ], as
Margaret's friend, was the only guest,
and we had leisurely meal with little
interesting conversation thrown in az
side dish as 1t were; everything said was
good and every member OF the family
took an intelligent part in whatever was
being discussed, and everyone who spoke
was given attention and consideration
by the others. Now knowwhy am not
as clever as Margaret at repartee, and Why
she knows 80 much of political ques-
tons aud impers0nal problems. Her
father il member of the council, and
when be and her brother discussed civic
measures, everyone listened or gave an
opinion. Do you know that l left there
quite envious, but determined that, II
ever have home in which am the
presiding genius, will never let meal
time, especially the last meal OF the day,
degenerate into anything az material and
meaningless, as it is In my present
household. At my table there shall be
food for the mind as well as for the
body; We shall dine in the fullest sense
Of the word, and shall meet upon the
common level of an Interchange Of
thought upon some interesting and
worth while subject"
"Sermons in Dishes" laughed in an
swer. But, none tho less, felt that my
friend had learned something highly i'm
portsnt. doubt If any habit OF our
lives is as influential for our Immediate
happiness as we'll as for our future de-
velopment as the tone and subject of our
daily conversation at meals.
What an important item is the sub
iect for discussion 385 days in year;
how beneficial or how deteriOrating may
be the effect upon the mind Of young
persons, be they members OF the family
or chance guests. For the rarity OF
good talk is perhaps nowhere 30 con-
spicuously emphasized as at dinner, be 1t
formal affair or family gathering.
Few are the leaders who regard the
occasion as other than gastronomic or
a sartorial display, to be seasoned If pos
sibIe with enough of light talk to i'm.
part an air of gayety to the function.
The mind, 1t would seem, were negle-
gible quality, not worthy of considera-
ton.
Why should not preparations, on the
part of the dinner giver,-housekeeper
or host. 81, include thought as TO what
shall be said? One need not attempt to
give the occasion conversazione COM
plexion but merely arrange that the talk
shall be generally interesting and enter
tanning. One need not eliminate Origi-
nality, which is spontaneous, but the
well informed and tactful hostess not
only can appear to good conversational
advantage, but she can, by giving
thought to the matter, make each guest
yield the best of which he or she is Ca
pable for the entertainment Of the COM
Pany.
As at present exhibited in social life.
table conversation IL at low water mark.
Formerly a social gathering, such a. a
dinner, was always held In the giver's
own home, where the owners personal
tastes, az represented in his books, pic.
lures aud hobbies. gave the keynote for
| subjects of converse, or suggested ap
prupriate themes. Now the scene often
shifts to the hotel and rented scenery,
which is not conducive to feast OF rea-
son and flow OF soul. At least, this Is
true of mixed social gatherings. Mems
dinners usually have some attic salt with
which to season the dishes. But to
have the real and piquant quality. it
takes the virile and strong ideas of the
man, coping with the tact and imagina-
ton OF clever woman to produce the
finest flower of conversation.
The art Of good table talk needs for Its
best expression, well-directed knowl-
edge gained from books and life, lucidi-
ty of statement, fine sense of humor,
Imagination, and a we'll modulated and
clear voice. These requirements should
be upheld as desirable, and made an OBJ
ject of ambition, instead OF being wholly
ignored. The time aud place to begin to
assume these accomplishments Is In the
home and at the family table. Then, in-
deed we may dine happily, q great sd
vapcement over ordinary eating.