davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
LAUGHTER ALWAYS A TONIC
Smile Makes Friends Where o Long
Face VIII inspire Feeling
Of Repulsion.

Live pleasant" said Mr.. Burke
once TO a grave and anxious gentle
man. Eut was the grave and anxious
gentleman persuaded? So eminent n
man as Justice Story believed that
to be healthy It was wise to laugh
an hour every day.
Laughter Is pre-eminently a social
habit, We mask our cares with
laughter--when we can. We convey
our sympathy to Others by laughter,
at least by kindly smiles What !s
more charming--ln a street car, for
eXample---than to see tense face,
sad face, a weary face, suddenly
shine out in smiling recognition of q
look 1t loves? Idiots laugh alone. We
all feel little idiotic when we do
II, although 1t is not certain that we
are 80. On the other hand, very
solemn persons will grow quite bolster
Gus In merry company.
1t is amazing how easily laughter
can be cultivated. Everything In our
ordinary lives has its lighter side,
Its eayer side, even things in which
grave turn Of mind would never
suspect 1t. What pleasanter habit
than that of detecting sunshine, of
pointing It out to others?
There is one safe subject Of laughter
yourself. The ancients had fine
phrase about seeing things under the
aspect Of eternity. When you find
yourself swamped, drowned in little
cares and vexations, think how short
they are, how long life is, how long
beauty lasts. and love, and nature, and
God Tho contrast will make you
smile a little, and that smile, II you
get the habit of It, is one of the best
antidotes for misery ever yet dIscov-
cred by man.--Youth's Companion,
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Yomnhster Had Woke Up.

At a matinee performance stout
woman appeared at the entrance lead
ing two boys, aged seven and nine,
and presented one ticket.
You will have to buy tickets for
those boys" insisted the manager.
mo, | won't she protested; they
always go to sleep as soon as they
get inside. Why should | pay for
them if they don't see the show?"
The manager thought Of the days
when his mother took him to matt
nees, and as the argument was one
that he could not get around, he
passed them In. After the first act
an usher came to the manager and
handed him a quarter.
whats this for?" he asked.
THE fat lady told me to tell you
one of the kids woke up" .'
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Machinery will be
Getting Together.

The Chattanooga Times, a Demo
cratic paper, says Of the political con
ditions there: There is a movement
on foot which means that the repub-
lican elephant is to check his trunk
and the progressive moose is to shed
his horns for the time being, and the
two political animals are TO join forces
and capture every Office in Hamilton
county in the election Of August one
year hence" In looking over the
field for the congressional and other
elections for next year republicans
find no reason for division. The con
test for the next house will be between
the republican and the democratic
parties. There is manii silly no place
for a third party drawn from republican
ranks. Take the case of the county,
Hamilton, in which Chattanooga is
situated. The normal democratic ma
jority is small, It is manufacturing
region in which protective policy has
vigorous support. What goes on in
the present congress is strengthening
this sentiment.
Tennessee reelected its republican
governor last year by plurality Of
over 5000, and the total vote he re-
ceived was but a few thousand less
than that cast for Wilson. The re-
pubicans in the state are preparing
for next year and are not in the least
disposed to present the democratic
party with another accidental victory.
A great daal of opposition exists in
the south TO various features of the
pending tariff revision. Only in one
state, Louisiana, are the democrats in
open revolt, but the bill as whole
pleases no southern community. The
attitude Of Louisiana is protectionist.
1t asks a continued duty on sugar in
order to protect the industry from
cheap labor and other un- American
conditions. To be protectionlst in
any item is an approval Of the princi'
pal. Louisiana considers it right and
necessary to legislate so as to build up
its productive resources and safeguard
the American standard Of living. Re
publicansm will be powerfully asserted
in the south as well as other sections
in 1914 Globe Democrat.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
MATCHED HIM WITH TITLES
lrishman Fully the Equal Of Swaeger-
Ing Brltisher Who Was Somewhat
Given to Boosting.

1t was evident In his swagger that
he was n scion of the British arls-
tocracy, and the most casual observer
could not have failed to note that he
was stranger to tho city. He touch
ed q vell-dressed, Authenticated young
man, who was lolling in front Of
hotel, on the shoulder
Pardon me, me dear man, lSlt could
! trouble you for a match?" After
lighting his cigar, continued: bah
Jove, this Is a remarkable city. This
is me first visit to New York, dye
know? I'm deucid stranger, but on
the other side I'm a person of impor
tance. | am Sir Francis Daffy, Knight
Of the Garter, knight Of the Bath
Knight Of the Double Eagle, knight of
the Golden Fleece. Knight of the Iron
Cross, Dye mind telling me your
name, me dear man.
Replied he of the auburn hair, in
deep, rich brogue;
Me name Is Michael Murphy, night
before last, night before that, last
night, tonight and every night--Mich-
ael Murphy"
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
LIVE ALWAYS IN THE PAST
Modern Improvement Frowned Upon
BY a Certain Class Of English
People.

Thaxted. DO you know Thaxted,
with its glorious church and It's splen.
did isolation from the railway? Its
pride was being in Essex and seven
miles from a railway. The nearest
station was Elsenham, and you had
to get cart Of some kind to get
you to Thaxted from Elseuham. but
Sir Walter Gilbey has broken down
the tradition by getting light rail-
way built between Elsenham and
Thaxted. And the oldest part of it
is that Sir Walter GiIbey, lover Of
horses, has not travelled by railway
for many years lie travels by motor
car when on the journey from Essex
to France with an interval between
Dover and Calais). Thus he has skip.
ped a generation Of invention.
There is a certain triumph in the
refusal 70 recognize inventions, and
there are many people who keep their
eyes on the ground and never see
aeroplanes. Only n few years ago
| knew a couple OF old ladies who
lived near Henley and always visited
oxford each summer. But they did
not recognize the Great Western rail
way The family carriage was sent
behind the family horses and the la.
dies were driven by road 1t was a
matter of courtesy to refrain from al
usion to railways when those dear
cid ladies asked you to dinner.--LOn-
don Chronicle
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
COURTESY ALWAYS AN ASSET
Simple Trial VIII Convince Anyone
That IL Really Pays to 30 Gen.
tie and Polite.

If you doubt the value Of courtesy,
just put the power Of courtesy TO
test for a single day. When you
have done this you will be ready to
admit that It has dynamic power.
Let US suppose that you are a house
keeper, with many things to attend TO
at the markets and shops. You de-
termIne, come what may, that you
will be courteous. A dealer has sent
you poor goods, for which he has
made an exorbitant charge.
He declares that this Is not true;
he is rough and determined.
"You maintain an attitude OF per
feet courtesy, wait little, are patient
patience is one of the essentials OF
courtesy-state that you hope he can
adjust the matter, as you would pre-
fer to have him continue to support
you.
AS a rule you will gain your point
with the dealer. In any event you
will score within yourself more than
one point in the strength saved and
IN self-respect maintained More than
this, you will leave definite good with
each person with whom you come in
contact,
That each human being ia sur
rounded by an emanation which af-
fects those about them is true, since
it is sufficiently tangible to have been
photographed What the sun Is to
air courtesy is to this personal at
mosphere, and to be courteous Is to
have aud to hold and to radiate
beneticent power which will be like
the power Of sunshine.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Vindlcated,

Prisoner at the bar" said His Hon
or, you are charged with having
struck a man and then run away.
You are a respectable looking man,
and am sorry to see you here"
But l am not guilty of the charge,
SIR,
Didn't you strike a MANI"
NC. sir. simply made motion"
Didn't you run away?"
Il did not. It was impossible"
How impossible?'
Il belonged to baseball club for
year, and then was bounced because
] couldn't make a run. Never made
one tho whole season."
You may go, prisoner. You are
not the guilty wretch I thought you!"
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Precoclous Younuster.

Three-year-old Louise's father had
slapped her hands for holding the
screen door open, as the flies were
extremely annoying. Her mother said
TO him In low tone: "She doesn't
understand why you are furnishing
her" A short time after she did
something naughty and. as she spied
her father coming towards her, she
said: Don't, papa; Louise don't un-
derstand."
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Just a Parrot storY--rhat,s All.

Miss Van Wlnkle possessed par
rot which. she often declared, showed
signs of almost human intelligence.
She was being courted by Pull
man conductor, whose runs were Of
such length that he could call only
once each week, Came a day, how
ever, when, due to a railroad acci-
dent, he was enabled to call two days
after his last visit
As he entered the room where the
parrots cage hung, Polly perked her
head on one side and observed:
We'll, I'll be ilggered; this has
been q laundering short week."
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Not Whit the Judae Intended.

An English firm was prosecuted be-
fore the higher court for swindling
and unfair business dealings.
In acquitting them the chief justice
said with great severity: The evil
dence presented is not quite sufI-
cient to convict you, but if any one
wishes to know my opinion Of your
methods l hope that they will come
TO me-"
Two days afterward the firms ad-
vertisement appeared in all the Lon
don papers with the following well
displayed: Reference, by special
permission, the Lord Chief Justice Of
England"
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Almost the Same Thinn.

Educated Egyptian-You have no
wonderful hieroglyphics in your coun-
try, -ir; no mysterious inscriptions,
no undecipherable relics of an ancient
literature whose secrets the wise men
OF the world have tried for ages to
discover.
Tourist-No, We haven't any OF
those things; but-brightening up
we've got our Railway Guides.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24

With Mexico getting ugly and the
'insiduous lobby" making great fuss
President Wilson is having hard luck
during the vacation" Of his chief ad'
visor, Mr.. Bryan, who says he is com
PEELED to travel and lecture in order to
meet the high cost Of living at Wash
inp,on.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
HoroIouIcaI Psychosls,

Father. my watch is mentally de-
ranged"
why, my son, watch can't be
mentally derangedl"
Mine is. The jeweler told me to-
day It had lost its balance. Judge.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24

The Mexican situation has become
intolerable. A crisis is at hand. The
nations OF the world look to our gov.
eminent for protection of theirinte
in Mexico, as our Monroe doctrin="
requires that other governments keep
their hands n Central and South Amer
ican republics. The president and
his secretary RI safe Njil have to han
die the Monroe doctrine with cautinus
care for while or il will have to be
abandont d M xico must be pacifed,
licked or pariitioned. If our govern
ment can't do its duty there are oihsr
governments able and willing to make
a great county Of Mexico. Every
patriotic American wants to see closer
union between the Maxicans and the
Americans, even if it be necessary to
lorcibly subdue the Mexicans.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24

land and sold most Of it to bona fde
settlers. A great portion Of the
5000, 900 acres has been converted
into farms and thriving towns.
Creed Taylor, failing to get his claim
recognized for himself and the VaIliere
heirs, scld the claim 10 several persons.
Though it is alleged they knew they
possessed no title, the purchasers got
up an abstract OF title, ignoring the
United States government. and its
grantees. For years they baye been
selling and resclling these lands, Some
OF the parties who traded for or in
vested money in these worthless titles
Instituted suits in the United States
courts against the true owners, but in
every instance were defeated
Though hundreds Of thesa swindles
have been perpetrated in different paris
OF the country, few Of the swindlers
have been apprehended. So soon as
they get possession of property that
can be converted into ready cash they
lose no time in disposing Of it and
leaving for other green fields TO prey
upon the unsuspecting public. One
OF the frauds was worked recently in
Kansas City, but before the swindler
could make his getaway be was arrested
and sentenced to two years in the pen
itentiary. The fraudulent papers had
been sent to the recorder Of Taney
county to be recorded.
The above article taken from last
Sundays Springfield Leader, is all right
as far as it goes, but it does not 90 far
enough. We believe that deter
mined effort should be made by both
the federal and state officers to run
this gang Of swiudlers down and send
the whose outfit to the penitentiary
for good long term.
The first Of the week the writer saw
one OF these so'called Spanish alb
stracts that had been sent through the
United States mail, and it was simply
mass Of fraud from start TO finish.
It contained a cer ifcate from what
purported to be U. S. land office
registrar al NV Orleans dated in ITS,
twenty-eight years before the United
States acquired the Louisiana territory
and a year btl1re the declaration OF in
dependence "A year before there was
any United States Of America. An
o,her affidavit purporls to be made by
John P. Deerfeld, clerk Of the circuit
court and exofIicio recorder OF deeds
Of Taney counry, Missouri, dated in
1909, when as matter OF fact there
never was a recorder Of that name in
this county, ard at the time this aft
davit was supposed to have been made
Walter /. Moore was re ,older Of deeds
for this county.
/ We don't know much about Law
and such things, but it looks 10 us as
though the post cfice officials could
take these cases up for the fraudulent
use of the mails, as these fraudulent
deeds and abstracts are sent by mai
all over the country all the time.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24
Where Are the Results.

The S.. Louis Republic says, the
Hadley administration talked lluently.
The eloquence OF the present demo
cratic administration is found in re-
srhs." That's really eloquent but
where are the results? In the law
that deprives the state Of fire insur'
ance? In the suspension Of dramshop
and liquor laws in the cities? In new
cfIlces and official expenses as great in
cost as all OF the long established
offices and departments Of the state
government In the payment Of a
big bonus 10 brokers for the sale Of
State bonds at par when they ought to
have commanded a premium? In the
employment Of wives, daughters and
youthful sons Of State officials in the
most important departments Of the
state government? In the reckless
expenditure Of public funds? In freak
legislation? Where, oh, where, are
the eloquent results?
Senator Bacon Of Georgia enjoys the
di tinction Of b ing tie fr,t Uni'ed
States senator by direct vote Of tie
peop e under the seventeenth amend
ment 10 the national constitution, hav-
! ing been re elected by that method.
His state was the only commonwealth
TO deny the right Of the nation TO
direct the election Of seuators by direct
vote. Wonder who will be the first
/ United Safes senator from Missouri to
be elected by direct vote? 1t is 10 be
hoped that he will not be democrat
and that his name will not be William
J. Stone.
The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1913-07-24

4 bible writer said the wicked no
more shall pass. John Kennish. for
the public utilities commission, has
said that none OF US shall pass" in
Mis- ouri unless we buy and pay for
our transportation.
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
MEN WHO ARE FORGOTTEN.

The death of John B. Henderson
seems to leave George F. Edmunds
and William Sprague the sole sur
vivors of the fifty-six senators who
in May, 1869, voted finally on the
mpeachment of President Andrew
Johnson-Evening Post.
1t was stated recently in the Cen
fury that Cornelius N. Cole is still
alive. and this is confirmed by the
new Biographical Congressional D+-
rectory.
Cole was born in Lodi, n. Y, and
went to California in lS49. He was
elected to the United States senate in
1857 and served until March 4. 1873.
He must be one of the last forty
miners" as we'll as one of the last Of
the fifty-siX senators who voted on
the Impeachment of President John
son in May, 1868. not 1869, as the
Evening Post has it.
S 1t is one of the remarkable twists
of American politics that a man who
served six years in the United States
senate during the stormiest period Of
the government. and participated in
one or the greatest state trials Of all
history, should have been so CON-
3,Ietelv forgotten trat even students
..;ail to remember that he ever lived.
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
THE PANAMA TOLLS AGAIN.

Senator Chamberlin of Oregon
wants to give the coastwise shipping
trust free passage for its boats
through the Panama canal, while
charging tolls to ships of all other
nations. He admits that this favor
itism is forbidden by the Hay
Pauncefote treaty between the Unit
ed States and Great Britain. Where
fore, Senator Chamberlin proposes to
abrogate the treaty,
1t is as if a debtor should seek to
justify his failure to pay interest on
his note by repudiating the princi-
pal.
There is just one way to end the
Panama canal tangle. That is for
congress to repeal the unjust and
treaty-breaking provision that gives
free passage to the shipping trust.
The trust will not like this way, Sen
ator Chamberlin will not like it, and
grafters who are trying to start a
snarl that will stop tariff revision
will make strenuous objections.
But it is the only decent, honor
able way out of bad mess. Senator
Chamberlin' device to make a big
fraud justify little one will not ap-
peal to the American people.-Chi-
cago Journal.
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
THE SECRETARY'S STOVE-PIPE
HAT

Colonel Bryan has equipped him
self with the browning glory OF an
OtticehOlder, a StOve-plpe hat.-St.
Louis Globe-Democrat-
Don't you hear the news a-humming
up and down the mighty land,
From the prairies of Nebraska to the
far Floridian sand?
Don't you sense the modern wonder
booming up like ThOric tnun-
der?
Common People, stand from under
since you can not understand.
For it's William Jennings Bryan in
a--halt-what's that,
Yes, it's William Jennings Bryan in
a stove-pipe hat.
| have seen a plague Of places and
observed lot of things
In thirty year meander 'mong the
cabbages and kings;
| have witnessed cataclysms. been a
party unto Schisms.
Known a many mad surprises such
as ardent living brings:
But | never yet imagined such a
shock as that
Namely, William Jennings Bryan in
a stove-pipe hat.
Is the mild and meek Caucasian now
eternally played OUT
Is there nothing more to marvel at
and nothing left to doubt?
Have the stars begun to tumble in a
universal tumble?
Has the sun begun to rumble, with
the planets in rOut?
Well, | reckon things are crOssWise,
for it seems like that
Since the William Jennings Bryan
wears a StOve-pipe hat.
If | ever get to heaven, which | own
! hope to do,
| shall not lay out a Decline for the
Cherubimic crew:
Nor Socrates go looking soon as l
have had my booking.
Nor for Shakespeare, nor for Shelly,
nor for you, Dear Reader. you.
Nay, I'll mosey round the Throne
Room in the seventh heaven
flat
Till l greet the angel Bryan in a
stOve-pipe hat,
Robertus Love in New York Sun.
St. Louis. March %.
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
CALIFORNIA WITHIN HER
RIGHTS.

The CalifOrnia-Japan situation,
while difficult, is not complex.
Under the Californian law, no Jap
anese immigrant can become a citi-
zen, though this prohibition does
not extend to the native-born. The
legislature now proposes to pass a
law ordaining that no alien can be-
come a landholder. ~
Now the Constitution of the Unit
ed States provides that this consti-
tuition and the laws of the United
States which shall be made in pur-
suance thereof, and all treaties
made, or which shall be made, under
the authority of the United States,
shall be the supreme law of the
land. and the Judges in every state
shall be bound thereby, anything in
the constitution or laws of any state
to the contrary notwithstanding"
Under this provision, if any law
of California were in contraventiOn
Of the Japanese treaty it would be,
by the very fact, null and void. But
the right to hold land in the several
states of this Union, has never SO far
as we recollect, been the subject of
treaty with a foreign power, nor do
we see how it could we'll become SO.
In short: California appears to
be we'll within her rights in the pro-
posed legislation. 1t comes under
the head of things lawful but not
eXpedient. Secretary Bryan's mis-
sion is to persuade the Golden State
not to do. in the interest of neigh
borliness and peace, what she has
an undOubted right to do if she so
elects.-Republic.
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
Dear reader, did you ever hear OF

Dear reader, did you ever hear of
that $1O,O00,00O' capitol improve
ment grab before it passed both
houses like it was creased? The Ex-
press frankly confesses that it never
heard Of it Except that it was men
toned by Gov. Carroll once) until
the legislature met Then it was to-
be noticed in the newspapers that
Gov. Clarke had an obsession on the
subject-but the people never
dreamed that their own representa-
tives-the men they had sent to Des
Moines to transact the business of
the. state--would take in with any
such pipe dream Now, what The
Express wants to know is, How did
the Des Moines boosters do it? What
powerful inducement caused nearly
all the members of the general ass
Isembly to fly directly in the face of
what they knew would be their con-
:stituents' desires when they they
should hear of this reckless squan-
dering Of the taxes? Legislators are:
not 50 prone to affront public senti1
ment Of the stae. What did tn
5h1t 49, Ind pc ut Knox-
The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1913-05-01
An INHERITANCE TAX EXAMPLE

Senator LaFollette would like an
income tax which would take for
the government 50 per cent Of all
estates in excess Of SIS 100000.
The estate of the late J. Pierpont
Morgan is variously estimated at
from $75 100000 to 5,O00,O6G.
Taking the latter figure as being by
far the more probable, the death
duties on the LaFoliette scale would
be one-half of s110, 100000, of $685.
8D00,00
The duty on wool and wooden
goods in 1911 yielded the govern
,ment only s28,96S,517 The inherit
ance tax would bring almost twice
the revenue from the estate of a
single millionaire that was collected
by taxing warm clothing from the
backs OF the poor.
Who is better able to spare this
noney, tho heirs Of Mr.. Morgan, or
i 81 4 Eoplen, CLOTH