Connecticut western news., 1913-12-04
The Wurra Wurra Club

| "as iatS Ah oPShAhe up iaNlHs peen SAAFa busy supplying horseradish for the Thanksgiving dinners. The president, Henry Ives, was not in the chair and it was reported that he was suffering with indigestion. Frank Stevens arose and in his best drug store English. said that paragorically speaking he was able to fill Henry Ives place. He was escorted to the platform. Howard Lathrop, on the horse fiddle, accompanied Allyn Fuller in the Opening Ode, revealing the proficiency they had gained in the practice for the initiation. On motion, duly seconded, it was voted that Watson Hardenbergh read the minutes of the last meeting to the same accompaniment. The president then called upon Doe" Ross to report for the committee on plan and scoop for the initiation of John Rodemeyer.
 "Mr. President" said Doc Ross, rising with that genial smile he puts on when he is going to spring a new cat yarn or pull tooth, "Your committee has been disappointed in its plans for the initiation. We had most elaborate plans made, off ficers were to be here from the Grand Lodge of Wurra Wurras and the Ladies' Auxiliary were to serve refreshments. 'Slats' had organized the calathumpian band to furnish music for the occasion, he himself playing the obligato on the horse fiddle. Allyn Fuller had invented an automobile goat-a most marvellous contrivance, warranted never to get un- ruly and always to hit the right spot at the time. This is bound to be adopted by all fraternities in view of the uncer- tain habits and the high cost of living among goats; and it would have made this Club famous to have used it first. But | here comes that brother-in-law of mine and kicks the whole thing over. It's | just like him. It's a wonder he didn't kick out on that wedding of his. He says right out, I hain't going to join that blamed Wurra Wurra anyway. can find out all that goes on there with out having to pay dues. Besides that, sez he, I've married wife and I can't come; and what's more 1 now enjoy the distinction of being the only man in town who isn't a member. Do you think I'm going to surrender that distinction? l? No sir, Pm going to organize a club all by myself. 1t will be known as the Anti Wurra or Anti for short. I'll be the only member and my wife will be the ladies auxiliary That's just what he said, Mir. President, and that's the situa- ton as we have to report it."
 By the great jumpin' gee whitakers,' said the fat member, rising and saluting in due form, "that don't soun' lik' John. That's tn kinder talk that busted up tn 'semblies. That's 'sclusive and aristi- cracit an John ain't that way bit. I'll b blamed ef I don't b'lieve that Doc Ross is putin up one of them dunn yarns o'hisn when folks all know he's l lyin' an yit they kinder b'lieve him. have an idee that we'd better git Lew Rhoades up here an give Doc tn third degree an see whether he's lyin' bout John or not. Speakin' O John, I'd like t make move that when he breaches for tn dominIes that this ere club tend meetin' en massey-that's French, my wife says, an ez near's l c'n find out it means tn whole dunn lot O us. l s'pose it wuz all right fir tn dominies t help John out so's't he could git married and have d honeymoon but havin' 'em tryin' to edit a newspaper ain't what it's cracked up t be; am l move that eff John ever gifts married ag'in or wants t take anuther l honeymoon without gittin' married ag'in -I mean ef he wants t take leetle trip sometime he git someone ez has had Experience like IIod Humphrey or Phil preachers. They're all right in their place. But my wife sez, sez she don't prove O th'--what-ye-ma-call-it-th' moral tune of the paper. She sez, sez she, the idee of them ministers citin' scriptur' tryin' to prove by Moses that its all right for women to be wearin' them 'eer landish hobblc skirts An she scz, 'Ain't it orful for d minister 10 be usin' such language ez skinned a mile She sez, 'ef she cd find out which one O them ministers wrote it she'd go t his church jest t find out ef he talks that way in tn pulpit an of he did, my lam, wouldn't she jest talk in sewin' 'siety, an cal'late it's consid'able sum SO"
 "ATr, President" said the Rev. w. Howard Mills, Fl think the last speaker has failed to appreciate q little genial