The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-01-11

would say. He felt almost competent
TO enter the medical profession.
80 you think 1 must have an OPP
eration?'' he said, YEARLY, I've never
had one in my life, and don't want to
begin now
The Mayos confirmed DR.. MCGUIRE
verdict.
Most certainly it is diverticulus,' -
they affirmed, you should be oper-
ated upon at once"
And said Senator waggener.
"just what are my chances of living
without an operation?"
WELL" meditated the physician,
there's just one chance out of seven
that you may possibly live three
months"
"Um-m." murmured Senator wag-
gener. He looked grave. And with
the operation?" he wanted to know.
Seven out of ten.' said the Mayo
Brothers. promptly.
The Kansas senator uttered one
word. 1t was: Operate
Whereupon the physicians began.
They operated in August, and they
operated in November. Then they
waited a year, and they operated
again.
1t took five days to prepare for the
first operation, and it was delicate
incision. A cancerous growth. not
malignant, had twined itself about the
intestines, and was removed with sup
way. broke all records the first time
he was stretched on the operating
table. Never before was man ether
lied who did not beseech. Don't be-
gin too soon, doctor. I can still see
what you're doing"
The Kansas senator said nothing of
the kind. He shut his eyes, inhaled
the ether, plunged into a black fun
mel, head first, looked back to be sure
his feet were coming, and dropped to
"a W. a
nurse beside him. While he had been
shooting through the funnel the sur
geons had ripped him open, cut out
IA inches of him, and sewed him up
again. The senator is wont to tell you
they fastened him together like
double-barreIed shotgun.
The IA inches left a vacuous cav
ity into which something fell that
shouldn't have fallen. The senator's
internal machinery was most desper-
ately upset. The Mayo Brothers cut
him up again, removed large portion
of his skin, and drew him up a little
tighter.
This operation is known to the pro-
fession as laparotomy. Yes-laparoto-
my is the word. Senator Waggener
may confide in you that they put sew
eral dozen stitches in him, pulled him
together, and fastened him up like a
vest.
The cavity was eliminated And
after the senator was stumbling
about again, the surgeons in
formed him that there had been
nothing wrong with his appendix at all.
1t had been as healthy as anybody's
appendix. 1t wasn't even worth bot
Ting in alcohol, labelling. dating, and
placing on exhibition on the shelf
This operation was in November, 1911
and the next September they finished
the job. They unsewed him, put 200
new stitches in him, and told him he
was as good as new. The third opera
ton worked like a charm. Senator
Waggener slept three weeks and
awoke; he was reincarnated He felt
himself doubtfully. looked in the glass,
and decided he was still alive. Then
he came back to Kansas, wiser, far.
far wiser than he once was.
He will dig his hands in his pockets,
beam down upon you, and solemnly in
form you: well, here am. But it's
a miracle I'm alive today!'
Bale Waggener, you know, en-
bodies the spirit of Kansas-he is gem
uine. liberal, whole-souled. Topeka is
glad to have him back, and forgives
him even the laparotomy-he may
have lost his appendix, but he hasn't
lost his heart. So here's to Sem
ator Waggener!