The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-11-15

SO, 8. " "a Quincy st.-.......-.......... 80
ident Of the Woman's Right club at
once called a meeting and had passed
the following preamble and resolu-
ton:
Whereas, The question Of univer-
sal suffrage is ten times bigger than
that of the tariff: and
Whereas, It is of ten times more
Importance to this country than any
other measure; and
Whereas. Old Pap Pinkham is
treating the matter with Indifference.
If not disrespect; and
Whereas, Those not with us are
agin us; now therefore
Resolved, That we buy no more
postage stamps and mail no more let
tiers at this poStOffice until Old Pap
comes out flat footed for the cause,
and he must bring the president with
him when he comes; and be it further
Resolved. That while in connection
with the postOff1ce, Old Pap runs the
best grocery by long odds (see small
bills) of any town in the county, and
his prices are always moderate, we
hereby pledge ourselves not to make
q single darn purchase at his store
until the question of where he is at is
settled to our satisfaction; and be 1t
further
Resolved, That if the said Old Pap
is longer permitted to pitch the tune
for congregational singing in our
church we will withdraw from the
same or sing some other hymn and
thereby sing him down.
There it is in black and white, Mr..
President! could not pledge you and
I did not dare pledge myself until
had some word from you. have Off
set their scheme in a measure by Civ
ing away dill pickles and heads Of
cabbage with every purchase, but my
trade has suffered. no longer pitch
the tune in church, and that Injuries
my feelings more than 1 like to adj
NIT. Mrs. Pinkham says it will save
my voice against the time 1 lose my
job and will have to go back to driv-
ing oxen. but 1 Dunno dunno.
And then on the heels Of the first
great trouble comes Deacon Skinner.
1 saw him half block down the
streets, and knew by the way his jaw
was sot that he was coming for a row.
He had the sternness Of a Puritan
Father as he entered the postofi1ce
and said:
''See here, Pap, I've been told on
good authority that when you went
up to the city one day last week you
attended vaudeville show
You've hit it. Deacon replied
let?"
There was"
Twenty girls?"
Just twenty, deacon
And they had on tights?"
''They did"
"And they kicked high?"
about as high as the top of
woodshed door. 1 should say
And you sot there and looked at
'em?"
We'll, the president shall hear of
"why. he used to take in such
shows himself
eral.''
Il have already done so and told
him it was bang-up show he
shouldn't miss
Then. sir-then. sir. I'll appeal to the
And he went on and called a public
meeting at which two men and q half.
jammed through the following:
~; hereas. Old Pap. Pinkham is post
master of Jericho: and
Whereas, he should set moral ex-
amrle to the young; and
Whereas, we learn with pain and sor-
row. that he hasn't done SO. but on the
contrary has been seen In front seat
.'Whereas when spoken to on the mat
ter he replied in defiant manner and
defended the legs; now therefore be 1t
resignation of the aforesaid Old Pap Pink
ham as our postmaster; and be it
Resolved. that If the PIG stands by him
in a refusal to resign then the resignation
of that official be also requested; and
be it
to step down and out: and be 1t
Resolved. that IL our several requests
Huckieberry avenue and stringbean street
and begin row that will spread all over
the laad anS ~ IN the
dent as you are tolersbly busy defending
q poker game the other night that 1 was
playing as Old Pap, and not as postmas-
ter. beat Silas Hopkins out OF 9 cents
and she got old Mrs. Cofin to hold a pub
! lie meeting with her in the woodshed and
/, where's we have learned that we
have a fiend in human form dwelling in
is Old Pap Pinkham; and
Whereas, he is corrupting the morals
bands, and win bring woe to thousands
Of bones # not chsck s ma nGw t tnessfore;
| his signed promise never to play poker
again in this community. we proceed to
remove him in the manner seemingly best
| There are few other little things I
! might refer to. Mr.. President. but the
above e, win give you ,d fair idee Ct the
that you send special message to the
senate on the matter, but you might drop
ance. I have played poker rising of 70
years. and seldom hold anything lower
| than q straight, but II necessary to the
welfare of your administration 1 win give
1t up and turn to mumblety-peg- My life
belongs to my country.
/ OLD POP P1NKHAM,
Postmaster and Sacrifscer.
I-(Copyrizht. 1919, by the Mcclure News
paper Syndicate-)