The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1913-08-19
MONROE
Special to the Farmer.) - (By Arthur w. French.)

(Bys Arthur w. French.)
 | Oh the -chumps that sometimes l drive motor cars and they can talk l United States too, and often these
 bugs get lost in Monroe; lost as to I where they. and their cars are at.
 Lately. one came miles out of his I way, over from Derby to find WateF- i bury. Another, chugged in from New Haven, through the center and
 tried to find Long Hill, up and around | Stevenson, another came here, passed 1 the Center Schoo1house, went up the
 back road, turned east at the Jacob l horne through East Village and over Barn Hill, west again passing Will i Shelton's' and fetched up by the school 1 house at the foot of French s hill look ing about and saying: well I'll be d-d.'' At the Center park, roads. ] diverse and it's continual job for residents to point out where the high ways lead to.
 The ladies' auxiliary of the Stove club in porch party assem b1ed, have unanimously Tee Heed, to wit: Tt is just too awfulIy mean for anything, to have those men Con a close by stoop9 come around every night and smoke and, smoke and smoke and chew and chew and chew and talk and chin and chan and elueidate, enumer- ate and extemporize over-welI how's your corn and how much bug
 
 and about hens and eggs and calves and dry weather and the rowen cut, and the state road and now chicken houses and town meeting and why is a woodchuck, oh dear! We ladies don't have a long enough hear to get each other a word in edgewise, as to when is to be the next social and where has Mrs. Calder gone now? She took a suit case and how many were at church last Sunday and look in the book; who owns that auto and ain't it a crime; they've gone away for a week and what will their poor cat do and you ought to have seen her bath ing suit at Windoy Beach and look please, am I 8. button off in the back and it said so in the Bee and <ssMercy' there's hoppy toad.
 Representations of the farcicaI com edy-f farce as far country towns go entitled "Preference Enrolment" " was given at the town hall on the 1 and by those top line actors Regis trars Shelton and Sinclair. Each day the hall was ful1-fun of air-inc1ud- ing a caller who wanted to know where 1Newtown was and several drop ins now and then, half a dozen. Some times the registrars leaving the hall door ajar, to see if any got in, went over to the grocery where they could rubber across the park to '.let no gull ty man escape, as they smoked up and downed crackers, cheese, bananas, candy and so forth. O you Annan- ias, tTempus Fugit." But honest, it seemed really to them as if somebody kept a setting the clock back or B. A. Hurd's horse was going by. Never mind, the underworked actors will put it over the town for Six per and they deserve it, as the aforesaid farce was never better. enacted.
 Wasn't that 8 model Monroe town meeting, held last week, when $20,00O was appropriated for extra construc- ton work on the Center state road. We'll, we guess yes. Also. it was some representative get-together, with all corners of one mind. Even discussions were both pertinent and pleasant. Ov- CT 40 voted yes" for the appropria- tion. with only one objector, who af- ter a, mixed talk chort1ed out his lit tie mo-. A gentleman, at the meet ing speaking of this no vote said It's just like Mflligan, who said: *If Din his iver goes out in a boat an if the boat iver upsets an he was trun out into the water an'-an', well, bedad, he would drift or float up stream, sure.
 After the glucial or some other creative anad fixing up period of the world, in and about Monroe, left scat tered all over town, promiscuous-Iike were trillions of stones, in sizes from a gooseberry up to a woodhouse. As civilization advanced meadows and fields were made with said stones in their midst, by a large majority. Any how, it's good for sore eyes to see the builders of the Center state road dig ging, blasting and yanking out the stones to use in road filling. Long may it last while farmers smile and say: Take all the stun you want and get some more.''
 Whats what in Monroe? We'll there's a lot of guesses coming as to where is ttChickenville,' in the Cen ter? Why does Walter Freeman, working on the state road, keep on a laughing, Oats goin some'' Has B1in 'appendicitis'' of the arm, or was he cranking his new auto? What will Ed. c. Shelton build new next? How Is Henry Renouf's set of new false teeth growing? Whats the name of the new postmaster to be, at Step ney depot? Who'll be the first to have their cows get an apple jag? When will the cider mill have their opening stunt? Why does a Mon roe dog vociferate pretty much all night and stop over? Which way will the fall election go? Who will next have an automobile in town ? Who's our prettiest summer girl? Why is the Berkshire division? What time will Lords wind pump start to pump? After the dried up crops are in-wiIl therebe a plenty of rain? Who said the Long Hill trolley car over speeded? Will the flag ever fly from the Center park pole again? and ever so much and more.
 Great Money Saving Opportunities at the August Clearance Sale at F. H. l