The Washington herald., 1913-11-09
POSSUM SKETCHES
How Mrs. White Pat Bear and Whoopsd Zeb to Bo

''wimin do git cantankerous sumtimes,y
said Zeb White. the 'possum hunter of
Tennessee. one evening after his wife
had "drated his pesky hide" for not
leaving more firewood at the door.
'Yes. that's their privilege" I answer
ed, as I sat down beside him on the
doorstep.
Purity good woman. but has cantan-
kerous SPELLS" he continued. II was
just remembering one of the spells she
had about fifteen years ago ha! hal
ha!
STORY In it?"
"sorter story. In them days IL she got
cantankerous it,made me mad and I got
cantankerous. too. Then we'd go as
much as a week without speakin' to each
other. She was proud and wouldn't give
settin' breakfast she burned her hand
and I laffed at her and she got mad.
Then I got mad. and she turns on me
with:
u
agin IL live hundred years"
Nobody keers whether yo' do or
not" seq I, and with that We both set
up. Not another word did we say fur
days and days. though we got over bein'
mad and wanted dreadfuIly to make up.
reckon It had bin about two weeks. and
was thinkin' ia give in and speak to
her, when she put on her bonnit one
AFTERNOON and picked up a baskit. L
knowed. she was gwine up the mountain
arter chestnuts. and knowed thar was
a big bar lurkin' about up thar. !
wanted to tell her. but she had her nose
stuck up and wouldn't look at me, and
SO didn't say nothin'."
But you followed her?'' queried.
Yes, arter awhile took down my gun
and followed arter. I was gwine to keep
an eye on her without her KNOWN IT.
I'd seen that bar and knowed he was a
whooper and full OF fight trailed along
fur a mile or so. and then I seed the ole
woman pickin' up chestnuts jIst ahead
Of me. I had jist noticed that she was
loolxin' powerful mad and had the end
of her nose p'inted skyward. when that
bar showed up. She heard him trampin'
over the leaves and called out:
what yo' foIlowin' me fur. Zeb
White? won't make up with yo' till
yo' go down on yo'r knees and ak my
parding' When thar's a family row on
hand it's the husbands duty to give in
'She said Jest like that. sab. and the
bar stood up on his hind laigs and looked
at her in 4 funny way
And you didn't shoot?" I asked.
Not skassly. sah-not skassly. It
tckled me half to death to see she'd
made a mistake, and didn't say word.
1t just cum over me to let that bar
tackle the old woman and skeer the mad
ness out o. her. and so / waited. He
looked at her and sorter grinned and
drawed nearer, and while she was huntin'
among the leaves she called out:
'Mebbe yo' hev followed me. Zeb
White, to make up, but I'm mad from
top to bottom and don't keep to talk to
yo.''
II was nigh choked with latin. when
that bar suddenly slid in and fetched
her a cun which sent her roIlin' ten feet
away. She thought 1t was me, though
the Lawd knows 1 wouldn hev put a
hand on her in anger, and she grabs fur
a club and yells:
"tZeb White, yo' onery, pesky varmint.
but I'll whop yo' till yo' can't crawl home
to pay fur that"
when she got up and whirled about
thar stood the bar and a surpriseder
women never drawed the breath Of life.
She thought she was a mile from help.
with q fight on hand, and fur about a
mint she looked as IL she was gwine to
run. Then she braced up, spit on her
hands and / heard her sayin':
"Tt hain't Zeb like. I thought it was.
but I'll fight yo' jist the same! Drat my
hide, but I don't low anybody nor nuth-
in TO cum me around that way!'
Then she pitched right in" continued