Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1913-10-08
~ SCIENCE
Conducted by
Mrs. Alice Gilchell Kirk.
Refinement's Final Test Lies in Man
ners at Table,

ners at Table.
There is no place or condition where
the individual, young or old, is so I'M
erringly judged for his refinement as
when dining. This is the final test.
Customs change from year to year,
and one should not make himself con-
spicuous by disregarding the changes.
There have been many changes in the
manner of serving and table etiquette
since the time of Nero. At one time
it might have been customary to eat
with a knife or drink tea or coffee
with the spoon in the cup, but now
We have other ways of diSposing OF
these articles at certain times Knives
are made for cutting the food and the
fork for conveying 1t to the mouth.
A cup Is apt to be upset if the spoon
is left In it, so after stirring tea or
coffee lay the spoon in the saucer
when not in use.
How TO Hold Knife.
There is a right way and a wrong
for holding the knife and fork: TAX
ing them firmly in the hand with the
handles entirely covered by the hand
and not in between the thumb and
forefinger, which is frequently seen.
hood and then when grown to man
hood or womanhood one does not
have to suffer embarrassment from
not being at perfect ease at any
table. Sit erect, easily. but not
stiffly, at the table, never tipping
back nor stretching the legs under
the table. There is no necessity for
| bending nearly to the soup dish when
eating soup, neither should elbows
| be resting on the table while eating.
The napkin is laid across the lap and
not tucked in at the neck unless for
children, and then a bib is better
until they can use a napkin properly.
After the meal at home each member
! folds the napkin and puts it into a
napkin ring or linen case as desired.
OF course, at a hotel or restaurant
| 1t is not folded. but laid loosely at
the side of the plate.
The silver Is not put on the Ia Bile
to be played with nor the napkin
rings twirled and rolled. It is a bad
example for the children and shows
lack of self-control and poise. In
passing the plate for second help
Ing the knife and fork should be
| placed across it ut one side and
never laid on the cloth after once
| used. The blade of the knife or
tines of the fork should not rest on
the edges of the plate, but when not
in use laid across on the side of It,
Eating soup.
When soups are eaten the spoon is
filed by dipping toward the farthest
edge of the plate. Eat soup quitely.
Never crumb crackers or bread in
/ the soup, but eat it with the soup
Bread is spread in small pieces as
it is eaten and is broken rather than
! oil
Be hospitable but do not overdo
it, l once remember having a guest
pass his cup for a half cup of coffee.
He received just that amount. He
said, That Is the first time in my
life l ever asked for a half cup of
coffee and did not receive it full or
running over. l wanted Just that
much That is what 1 mean by not
OVERRIDING hospitality. Give guests
| and family just what they desire
and no more.
Chew food with the lips closed. Be-
gin teaching this when the children
are young and insist upon it and
they will thank you for 1t when they
are older Do not leave the table fire.
quently. This means anyone. A meal
should be restful and not exciting.
| although there should be plenty of
bright, interesting conversation at the
| table. Ihls helps wonderfully in the
digestive process
"Grouch" Spells Meal.
That is why l said last week mo
| crouch at our table because any
irritation spoils the appetite not only
of one, but the entire family Make
the conversation interesting to young
and old. So often grandmother sits
at the table when the conversation
seems to be entirely out of her life.
Do not forget her, If only to tell an
amusing story which she can enjoy.
Some one has said, True politeness
is kindness, Many people seem to
think the expressions excuse me-"
| forgive me-" thank you" and az
you please" out of date, but these ex-
pressions mark the person of refine
ment as truly as In the past Stand
ing until mother and sister are seated
at the table when children makes It
much easier when a man Of the world
to show easily and naturally neces-
sary courtesies. Politeness is never
out of place