Saturday news. (Watertown, S.D.) 19??-19??, 1913-10-16

AT forty ! man is one Of three things success.
saint or a crouch.
After hearing both sides Of a story you are IL ! posi-
ton to pass it up.
Honesty is q boomerang that never looks better 10 Il
man than when it comes home to roost.
Tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the
truth-lf You want trouble.
= y
We imagine that a dumb barber would be even more
satisfactory than 9 dunii' winter.
Jealousy will not listen to reason because II doesn't
believe there is such 9 thing.
Let the small boy make the noise Of the neighborhood
and he cares not who does the work.
Frank Baker and Christy Mathewson crowded Harry
Thaw off first page in the. daiies last week.
Prejudice is the feeling you have against 4 man that
has ms picture taken wit. his head leaning on ms hand.
We'll, the democratic tariff is now IN operation and
have you noticed any downward revision IN your grocery
bill YETI
The devil has no fault to find with the mother who
sends her children into the streets to play to keep them
from wearing out the rugs.
Dementia baseballitis-that's what some Of the Water
town base ball fans had when the world series was taking
place last week.
The pastor of the ssSharps and Flats would not OBJ
ject to women voting if the first thing they did was to vote
out the split skirt worn BY the fair sex.
There's nothing the matter with the new styles il mas
cnlne clothing except that they tend to give the impression
that the Wearer had his own clothes stolen the&night before.
Gov. Byrne will be looking forvotes in Codington coun-
ty some day and he will get just what he gave this county
nothing As Happy Hoohgan says, 1T IS a long woim that
has no toining.'
Next after the street paving in WatertoWn comes the
cluster lights. We must have them-can't let little towns
like Huron and Redfeld beat us out on the street lighting
proposition.
You've got to give Geo. w. Egan credit for one thing.
He IS a fighter and keeps after the newspapers that libeled
him until he gets their ssgoat.n Some newspapers thought
George had quit his libel suits but he has just commenced
to fight.
A gentleman; a man that's clean inside and out, who
neither looks up to the rich or down on the poor, who can
lose without squealing and who can win without Dragging;
who is conslderate OF women, children, and old people; who
share OF the world and let's other people have theirs.
YET, o AGAIN.
a ring at the telephone drew the office boy.
Lady to talk to you, sir, n he said to the senior portner.$
The senior partner took up the receiver and stood at the
down and went back to his desk. Twenty minutes later he
raised the receiver, said q few words, and presently hung
up. Then ne turned to his partner.
ut was my wife, : he explained. ashe was. still talk.
ing and hadn't missed me-
N ON THE MINISTER.
Mamma, Use got a stomach ACHE said Nellie Bly,,
'.That's because you've been without lunch. Your
stomach is empty. You would feel better if You had some
thing in it,"
That afternoon the minister called, and, in the course
of conversation, remarked that he had been suffering all
day with a severe headache.
.sIhat's because it's empty said Nellie. YOU'D
feel better if you had something in it,
##@ @x#a sM ##&s @@
Fl PERFECT WOMAN.
When Sam Jones was holding his meetings in Dallas.
on one occasion he said: "There's no such thing as a per-
feet man. Anybody present who has ever known a perfect
man stand up
Nobody stood up.
4sThose who have ever known a perfect woman stand
uD.'
One demure little woman stood I'D.
Did you ever know an absolutely perfect woman9,,
asked Sam, somewhat amazed.
8 didn't know her personally Z replied the little wo-.
man, "but have heard a great deal about her. She was
my husbands first wife.
##s \ $3.50
OH, JOY, WE RECEIVED $1.5o. ON INSCRIPTION
Yesterday, while sad and dreary, weak and weary.
across the unswept foor, we heard at first a gentle tapping,
then u became az, earnest rapping, rapping at our sanctum
door. Come int we said while we pondered. and N
silence we wondered what for US could be ID store; then tie
the doorbolt softly turning, in he walked; our cheek was
A@ 41--IIL 80 ~HIA