Yellowstone monitor. [volume] (Glendive, Mont.) 1905-1928, 1913-11-13

TOM STOUT'S WEEKLY LETTER
Interesting sldengnts on men and things political
FL nm..

4:
Washington, D. c., Nov. 9Th, l9l;
The Congressional Record is all thu
the name implies and then Conside,
: able. 1t is the daily published recor
of the proceedings of both houses c
Congress and lot OF other proceed
lngs. 1t has a list of subscriber
which, in many cases, is more car.
fully selected than it's list of contrib
utors. Taken from the beginning of
session to the end, it contains fe,
mighty good speeches, a lot of ordin
arily dull ones, a varied assortment o
information on about every subject t.
which the mind of man has been humor
A member of Congress can make al
oratorical effort, and perhaps hit, O
his life in speech of perhaps six o.
seven pages, studded with brillian
flashes of wit, dropping with pathos
fiery indignation, loaded with logic, EN-.
bellished with colloquy in the Con.
gressional Record and not occupy the
floor more than thirty seconds and act
ually speak not to exceed eighteen
words, as follows: "Mr. Speaker,
| ask unanimous consent that may be
allowed to extend my remarks in the
Record. - If no unfeeling colleague
arises and objects, which they seldom
do, the aforementioned member can
thereupon slip to the official stem
ographer the carefully wrought -out
and revised remarks which, OF. the
morning following, will appear in the
Record. A few days, or weeks or
months thereafter. both copies of those
remarks which were so casually "de-
livered in the house, will appear in
the mail of various and sundry con-
stituents of said member.
1t is not only the remarks, actually
and figuratively delivered, of the !
member which clutter up the pages of |
the Congressional Record. Lots of |
people who never were or never will
be members Of Congress get speeches,
essays, arguments, tables of figures
and what not in the Record through
the medium of friends who are men,
bers. Some influential constituents or,
perchance personal friend, of some
delivers an address. 1t may
or may not be on a topic of timely in
terest. The Congressman proceeds to
embalm it in the sacred archive of the
government. A prominent St. Louis
brewer died few days ago. By rea-
son of his ability to manufacture sew
,ral brands of beer in rather overwhel-
ming quantities and dispense it to our
hirsty populace at fair margin of |
,rofit, this gentleman died seized, as
'ur lawyer friends would say, of some
fifty million dollars. Upon the pass {
ng of the brewer. the attorney for his ,
'eirs felt called upon, or was called S
pon, to deliver few remarks of a
ulogistic character. It was a right +
;ood speech and did the life deeds of /
ne deceased brewer ample justice. 1t h
vas such good speech that member n
f Congress from St. Louis had it in Y
erted in the Congressional Record and t
ONE OF the more observant prohibi- t
lonists are now panning him for it. s
# course, If this congressman was as d
orehanded as some statesmen that {
ave run across in my comparatively Il
hort shift, he probably had figured Il
ut in advance the relative proportion n
f prohibition voters to the beer drink Il
1g voters in his district and acted p
ccordingly. a
have stated the Congressional
'ecord is occasionally illuminated with :
ashes OF humor. | do not know upon
xactiy whose shoulders will fall the :
1antle OF humorist- in-chief Of the "
lxty third congress. There may be
'me undiscovered Tom Corwins, Pri- II
ate John Aliens or Samuel X. Cush- 8,
'ans among the hundred and fifty-two e'
ew members but they have not made OF
ny exhibit of their mirth- provoking ST
- A: