davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
The Basement
Philosopher
(copyrigh,. 1918, by W. C. ch.pm.n)
By KENNETT HARRIS


The Janitor, uncomfortably attired
In his Sunday diagonals and stifny
starched collar, and chewing a badly
unraveled cigar which he had been un-
able to light, appeared suddenly to his
Scandinavian assistant, who was in
dustriously tinkering the valve of q
water faucet at the work bench.
so I've caught you, have II" said
the Janitor, sternly. "Monkeying
around as usual, see, the minute
turn my back. l can't go off and en-
Joy friends Notwithstanding that
| don't indulge in once a year-with-
out you taking advantage of it to neg
lect your work. Well, it amt no more
than what l expected. Got all the
work done, have you? Yes, you have!
The sidewalk looks like it. | bet you
amt washed it off since morning
Washed it off at noon? Well what if
you did? Don't you suppose it's been
walked on since then? Think every
bOdys going to turn Oft and take the
middle of the street just because you
slushed a little water on it one time?
You'll be telling me the grass was cut
last summer as an excuse for not run
ming the mower this year What did
you suppose me and Ihe estate is pay
ing you wages for?
Thought I'd be pleased for once
did your the Janitor repeated, with a
glare Of increased severity. See
here, Nels, my friend, when you talk
that way, it sounds like lip. and don't
like no lip from you. Get me? What
did you think l was going to do? Take
you out and buy you a drink? Give you
a gold watch with your initials in dia-
monds on the back and an engraved
testimonial inside the case? Call a
mass meeting of the tenants and en-
der you vote OF thanks? Pleased!
oh, sure I'm pleased" contiuued
the Janitor, sarcas ideally. I'm ticNed
most to pieces TO come back and find
the building still standing right where
l left it. l didn't make no mistake
leaving it in your charge. You looked
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03

| moisture Of the lemonade and local
option variety.
Provide your mind with wholesome,
kind and charitable thoughts and keep
it cool by remembering how much
warmer it is in some other places
Hades, for instance.
Eat little and "cuss" less. The less
meat and other heavy stuff you eat
the better you will feel, and the more
money you can save for your vacation
trip. And the less you "cuss" the low.
er the thermometer will register.
Look upon the boiling process in
the light of Turkish bath, or a medi
cal prescription. A lot of bad things
are being stewed out of you, and you
are getting the treatment free-just
think of that
Finally, try to do g kind turn to
somebody else who is rot SO well Gil
as you are. That will help nightly
to make you happy, and ii you are
happy you will not care & snap a5ou'
the thermometer, change.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03

after 1t all right, all right You amt
let nobody carry it away. Not brick
missing as far as can see. Say, don't
you think I'm ungrateful, Nels, be-
cause 1 amt. I'm struggling to hold
back tears of JOY and keep from hug
ging you. OF course you might have
shoveled that ton or two of coal into
the other bin like l told you yester-
day, If you wanted to kill little time,
instead of fooling with things that you
amt got the brains to understand.
But amt offering that as no criti-
cism. Probably somebody told you
you was plumber and you didn't have
sense enough to know that they was
joshing you. You amt to blame, most
likely.
What's that? Got it all fixed lave
you? Well, amt that nice? l don't
guess you've put in more than half a
day on 1t either. A dollars worth of
work on a ten-cent job, that's your
idea of economy. Fine! Some of these
days l wouldn't be surprised if you
get that coal fixed-and the sidewalk.
And you thought I'd be pleased for
once Say, pleased amt no word for
it. feel like going out and celebrat-
ing. Amt put in more'n ten minutes
on it, yourself? You're a wonder!
guess it amt never occurred to you
chat you could get quite a start on that
coal in ten minutes.
''Ton minutes don't seem much to
hnnn- he qHnl NH L
worth nothing" the Janitor resumed,
after slight pause. "He don't stop to
figure that there amt only sixty min
utes in an hour and ten hours in
days work. Let me tell you some
thing, Nels, my friend: II didn't take
George Washington ten minutes to
sign the Declaration of Independence. |!
and I've seen fire put out in less
time. That Aston kid can earn more
money in interest on his capital in ten
than you could in a week fix
ing water faucets. don't say he could
Ii yca plumber, of
course. That's different, but the point
IS fhEt t'"oe'e money tn man n he
knows how to use IT,
"Oh, you amt even took time to
sat your lunch!' Fierce! That ac-
counts for the way you've lost flesh
ince seen you last. No wonder your
lothes Is hanging loose on you and
our cheeks is all fell In. Three
'clock now, close on, and nothing
assed your lips since breakfast, and
hen I'll bet you didn't eat more than
We or six pounds of solid food then. |
u course you couldn't be expected to
howell coal, and you was probably too I
'eak to- lift che hose out to- the side
ak ] amt let nothing since break {
Ist, myself, come to think Of 1t, but B
'en never did eat oftener taan a +
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
THE HATTIEsBtJitU NEWS

horse turned out to pasture. Say, you
begin easy with teaspoonful of soup
at time when you do eat. Go at it
gradual. Perhaps you amt took time
to sleep either. Just as like as not you
got SO feverish and worked up over
them few chores l left you to do that
you couldn't no more than close your
eyes and breathe hard. Now see here.
Nels, this amt right. You've got to
think Of your health. First thing you
know you'll have nervous prostration
and have to go to a rest cure. I'd be
In nice fix then, wouldn't 1? I'd have
10 work ten minutes longer of an eve
ming II didn't hire the mate to you.
Il don't like to have to tell a man
that he's chuckle-headed loafer,"
pursued the Janitor Il amt no kick
er. I'd sooner pat you on the back and
say a kind word to you than not. I'd
take pleasure in going to the agent
and recommending you for a raise of
wages If 1t didn't go again my con-
science. If you showed any disposition
to do anything except loaf and chew
the rag with the lady helps, if you had
any git-up to you at all, if you was a
man or half of a man, if Here, keep
your coat on, Nels! What are you
going to do. you chump? Don't you
know when a fellows josh"
The Janitor lodged as the enraged
assistant came at him with blazing
eyes and flying fists After that he did
the best he could for his weight and
size, but he presently found himself
on his back on the coal that the assist
ant had neglected to shovel, blinking
out of two badly swollen eyes. The as
sistant had already left the basement,
but came back at that instant to
thrust his shock head into the door
way.
1T bass nod dake me ten minutes"
he said. "Now go to de agent for my
wages. Gud bye!"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
TIME TABLE

GULF AND snIP ISLAND r. r. CO.
Effective Aug. 8. 1918.
Main LIne-Southbound.
Parlor car service on trains 3, 4, s
and 6, between Gulfport and Jackson.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
Terperinq the 49,, "a = -,

Tewpering the W7tcr 20 l.-sas.
There is a certain lawyer in this
city whose income from his practice
is nearer 100000 than $4,000 SAYS
the New York Evening Post. He is
known as the keenest and readiest of
c'oss-examiners, and a man of pro.
found learning rs well as common
sense. Yet he confesses that it took
one year for the fact to fash upon him
that he had been the victim Of a most
egregious piece of simple trickery.
This, his colloquy with the clerk in
haberdashery store, will explain it:
Eminent and Brilliant lawyer
want to buy bathing suit.
Small Clerk-Yes, Jir. (Sorts ont
several. All are of ordinary wooden
except one. This, by far the most ex.
pensive, is of a heavy knitted kind.
Lawyer remarks that he is to spend
summer In Maine.)
Eminent and Brilliant LAWYER
Why is this one so heavy?
Small ClerkaThat il for bathing In
where the water is very cold.
sir. We sell many to persons who 90
TO Maine.
Eminent and Brilliant I.awyer-Ah,
It's lucky learned this. I'll take the !
heavy one. buys suit and walks out
One year later the truth flashes or
lim.)
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
REASONS FOR NOT WORRYING
Bring Summer Philosophy to Aid
When the Hot Weather Disturbs
Ones EquiPoiss.

We are getting only what comes to
MS at this season, and the less we
think about the heat the cooler it will
seem.
Summer philosophy includes these
suggestions among others: Provide
your physical system with plenty Of
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
ECZEMA AND ITCHING CURED

The soothing, healing medication in
Or. Hotson's Eczema Ointment pore-
rates every tiny pore Of the skin
'Iears it Of all impurities --stoDs itch
ng instantly Dr. Uo'sol's Eczema
Ointment is guaranteed 80 speedily
heal eczema. rashes, r,ugworm, letter
md other unsightly erup.ons Ec
zena Ointment is a Doctors rrcscrip
lion, not an experiment. All druggists
or by mail, Pfelffer Chemical
Co., Philadelphia and St. Louis.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03

WANTED-People seek
ing pasturage for live stock will
read these columns, Some wide
awake pasture owner should have a
classified ad in The News. You
read this one, others will read yours.
Let our want ad man call on you. If
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE

PROPERTY THAT MUST BIZ SOLD
NEXT WEEK BY w. D. SMITH
2 store houses and 6 negro houses.
Bringing $500 rent per month. Will
sell for S2700.00. l 5-room house
near Hardy street for 100000; 5000
cash and balance in monthly pay
ments. l 5-room house near Main
street for $4,000. Pay me what
cash you can and balance like paying
rent. Two-story dwelling on River
avenue. and other vacant lots for
$2500.00. The lots are worth the
price.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03

Why don't you talk about the
tariff"
Il don't know anything about the
tariff"
"Umph! If the average man In
this country were like you there would
be sharp decrease in tho amount Of
talking done.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03

HELP WANTED-When you need
domestic help use The News want
columns II
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
DAY is ADVERTISED
BETTER THAN NIGHT.
(By Holland.)

Wy
> The day is a more popular
= time than night. Most of the
= work of the world is done while
3 the sun shines, and only that
o which cant be done at other
. hours is performed while dark
: ness reigns.
. The day is the more popular
= and the more fully utilized be-
. cause it is better advertised.
. The sun is the great pub.iaity
Q agent. 1t forces all to see and
. to remember. 1t it were pc fsi-
. bic to advertise any product Of
. man as well as sunlight is ad-
. vertised that particular product
o would drive all competitors
. from the field. Any breakfast
y food, baking powder, brand of
, shoes, style of furniture, cough
, drop, patent medicine, or what
, not, if it were only as we'll
, known as daylight, would have
, a monopoly of trade that would
B defy all rivals.
Such successful advertising
of the works of man is not pos
sible, but it can be followed at
distance. Successful manu-
facturers and merchants do fol-
low 1t, and as result advertis-
ed articles are the most widely
sold. This "a due to the fact
that advertising makes the
name OF an article known, and
1t also insures its quality. Goods ,
must be OF superior merit to .
make it profitable to advertise
} Them. ,
y ADVERTISING MEANS
RELIABILITY.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1913-10-03
HELP WANTED

WANTED AT ONCE-6 ladies' and 4
men solicitors. Good pay. Apply
McDonaiGs News Stand, Hays G.
Fields Drug Store. 2-2t
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
.Julesburg People

Write at once for our big 1913 list of
bargains in slightly used pianos and
player pianos. This list has just been
received from our printars and con-
tains illustrations and descriptions
of over 100 standard makes of instru-
ments, all specially marked to close
them out quickly. We guarantee to
save you $50 to $75 on a piano; SIS to
$3.50 on player piano if selected from
this list. Our regular terms have been
cut in two. We prepay the freight to
your depot. We guarantee you salts
faction or ''money back" 40 years
success and reputation behind your
deal with US.
Knight Campbell Music Co.,
Vests Largest and Oldest Music House
l625-3l California ST., Denver.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
Chautauqua

At the meeting last Thursday
night those who attended heard
all about the talent that is to be
furnished for the coming Chautau-
qua commencing July 1lth. The
price of the season tickets is to
be but $2 and this will pay for 10
entertainments one each afternoon
and evening for the five days.
The entertainment that is to be
furnished if bought Individually
would cost S12OO and will be the
best line of attraction ever heard
in csburg.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
Married at Long Beach Cal
ifornia

Word has been received in
Julesburg that Miss Hazel Ellen
Hamilton was married to Mr.. Har-
ry Russell Black at Long Beach
California where the young peo-
pie will make their future home.
Miss Hamilton is the only
daughter of Mrs. f. d. Hamilton
and spent much of her girlhood
in Julcsburg and her many friends
here will join with the Grit-Advo-
cate in wishing for her all Of the
good things of life.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
Car of Fords Arrive

Parker Brothers received We'd
nesday morning a car of Ford
Automobiles. This car together
with the one recently brought out
from Denver makes eight touring
cars for this month. Mr.. r. O.
Deulin the Sales Manager is busy
with a corps of helpers unloading
this car for delivery to those who
have placed orders for this popu-
lar car.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19

Lloyd Vernon of Sedgwick was in
town on Monday.
Mrs. j. f. Saunders spent
Tuesday in Julesburg..
Glen LaSelle and wife were
Chappell visitors Sunday.
County Commissioner Broad
head was in Julesburg on Monday.
Get our prices on cane and millet
seed before you buy. We can save
you money.
G. A. Reed.
W. II. Pound left for Hot
Springs South Dakato on Tues
day.
Miss 1mo Stewart of Oshkosh
was visiting friends in Julesbrrg
the first of the week.
A number of local Masons are
attending meeting of lodges
from North eastern Colorado in
Sterling today.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19

will observe next Sunday as Chill
drens Day. An interesting pro-
gram by the Sunday School is be-
ing prepared and special music by
the Sunday School choir.
Sterling celebrates the opening
of the North Sterling reservoir on
Saturday the 2lst. inst. The
celebration consists of all kinds of
games, sports and amusement and
a free trip to the reservoir.
Mr.. and Mrs. II. III. Smelser
entertained over last Sunday S. j.
Fair and son who were on their
way to California where they will
make their future home. Mr..
Fair is Mrs. Smelsers father.
II. II. Dee gets one of the new
Fords that arrived this week.
This will give Mr.. Dee two Ford
cars which he will use ir connec-
tion with his large cattle ranch in
the south west part of the county.
Buffalo Bills Wild West show
is to play an afternoons engage
meht on Sunday July goth. Just
across the river south Of Town.
The only stop they make this sea-
son between kearney and Denver
is at Julesburg and we predict
that Julesburg will see the larg-
est crowd ever in the town.
On Friday of this week the
Directors of the Scdgwick County
Fail Association will hold meet
ing at the Demonstration Farm to
make such plans as is necessary to
care for the harvest on the farm.
At this meeting they will also
make the plans for the Fair this
fall and for other publicity
matters which they think best to
carry out this fall.
A letter received from Rev.
VIM. Dye states that Mrs. Dye
has been moved to Marshall, Mo.
to get to a lowcraltitude and that
she apparently is gaining little.
That she has not had an ATTACK
with her heart since arriving there
and that the blood pressure is
gradually reducing Judging by
the color of her face and the rest
she receives. This will be good
news to Mrs. Dyes many friends.
/ Louis Reimer who has been
employed in the Citizens National
Bank and who was called to his
home in Nebraska on account of
the serious illness of his father
has decided not to return to Jules
burg and has had his personal ef-
fects sent to him. Mr.. Reimcr
w8s very congenial young man
and we regret the necessity of his
not returning to .Julesburg.
+. X. Montagna who is now the
leader of the Julesburg Band has
his office at Room No. 9 in the
Citizens National Bank Building
and is prepared to instruct or al
kinds of Musical instruments. He
has had q great deal Of experience
as an instructor having had IA pro
fessionaI band in Pittsburg. beer
Band Master of the o. NJ. W. o
A. ut GalltZcn. Pa. and has re
Gently been honorably discharge
rs Seargent of Fort Fit ArtiIer,
Band of the L. S. army. Mr.
Montagna is very much interested
in the Julesburg band and want.
to make it the best band in Nortl
Eastern Colorado but to do thi
he must have the cooperation o
the business men in town.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
w. c. T. u.

An interesting program has
been arranged for the meeting to
be held at the residence of Mrs.
w. NJ. Labaree on this (Thursday)
afternoon to which every one is
cordially invited.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19

at Ovid and stop regurlarly at Sedg.
wick. Nos 2l5 and PIG are flag stops
at Sedgwick.
No 2l2 is regular stop atSedgwick.
The w. I. Bower family and
Dorthy McNcw were Oshkosh
visitors on last Sunday.
Feed oats for sale.
q. K. Herfert Ovid Colo.
May 90 July 3rd.
Mrs. Ida Reich left Monday
for Greeley Colorado where she
will attend summer school.
Ovid was defeated by Sedaw
in a game Of base ball on the Sedg-
wick diamond last Sunday.
Mrs. G. L. Hendricks is euter-
tanning her sister Miss Jaclueline
Cheney of Wahoo. Nebraska.
G. B. McKinstry was down from
Sedgwick Monday looking after
legal matters at the County Court.
Don't buy Junk made Deering and
McCormick repairs when you can get
the genuine at Dye Bros
q. A. Reed has been unloading
the past week car load of heating
and cook stoves for his fall trade.
Mrs. q. II. Austin's Sunday
School class entertained Rev. VIM.
Dyes class at her home Tuesday
evening. June 10.
Dye Bros are agents for the d. trot
Vapor and Quick Meal Gasoline stove
Miss Addie McNew has accept
a position in the public schools at
Columbus, Montana, and will
teach there next year.
This office this week got out
some very attractive statements
for the first National Bank to be
distributed to their customers.
]. c. Wagner reports that Mrs.
Wagner is improving as well as
could possibly be expected after
her recent operation in Denver.
Buy your cane and millet seed oe
Reed.
Sylvester and SyIvanus Robey.
twin Brothers from Ulysses, Ne
braska were in julesburg last week
looking after their land interests
here.
Harris & Son had two cars of
stock on the Denver market last
week. One car of Baby Beef
brought the top price of $3.50. per
cwt.
Mrs. Finley Dye is getting
along in fine shape at Mercy hos
pitaI and expects to be home eth
er the last of the week or the first
ofneXt.
The town council on last Mon
day night passed a water ordinance
to govern a new meter system.
This ordinance will go into effect
On July 1st.
Mrs. Hieb's many friends will
be glad to learn that she will pos
sib!y be able to return home from
the hospital some time the latter
part of next week.
We have plenty of nice clean cane
and millet for sale and our prices are
right, Leave your orders with us and
we will protect you.
G. A. Reed Hardware
On July 18th. the law relating
to payment of tax for automobiles
will 60 into effect. In our next
weeks paper we will print extract:
from the law that will inform
those who own cars just what they
will have to do to comply with
this law.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
M. E. Church

William MlIburn Dye,
Pastor.
1000 A. M. Sunday School
Hoo A. M.-Public Worship
2.30 P. NJ, Junior League,
700 p. m.,-Epworth League.
SCOOP. M. -Public Worship
Wednesday, 7.45 P. M. Bible Study and
Prayer.
A. Cordial Welcome.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
Eye, Ear, Nose and Throat

DR.. Sapero the Denver specialist will
again be in JuIesburg at the Brown
Hotel on Monday and Tuesday. June 80
and July !. Consultation Free.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19
Congregational Church.

Seats free cordial welcome to all.
Louis Heb Minister
1000 a. m.-Bible School
Hoo a. m.- Public Worship, Sermon
"The Joy of the Lord
2:30 p. m.-Junior Endeavor Society
800 p. m.-Public Worship, Sermon
"The Penalty of Insincerity."
Wednesday 7:45 P. M. Mid-week SER
vice for prayer and Bible Study.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1913-06-19

:. ;.
:. LOCAL AND PERSONAL. :.
!: >.
:. = = :. :. :. ). :: y :. :. :. :. :. :. :. !. !. :. =
Julesburg Lodge Directory
A. F. & A. Md and 4th Fridays.
Eastern Star-2nd and 4th TUESDAYS.
l. 0. 0. EVERY Thursday.
M. w. A.-2nd and 4th THURSDAYS.
Royal Highlanders-First and Third
Mondays.
Rebekahs-lst and 3rd Tuesdays.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-02-15
WOMAN MUST SERVE
LIFE SENTENCE FOR
STAYING SON-IN-LAW

MONTGOMERY. ALA. Feb. To-
Mrs. Mary T. Godau, of Mobile, has lost
a last chance Of escaping life impris-
onment by the refusal Of the supreme
court to grant her an application for
rehearing. Her case was recently af-
frmed by the court and she is already
in the penitentiary.
The crime for which Mrs. Godau was
convicted was one of the most sensa
tional in the history Of Mobile She
murdered her son -iu-law. who was a
member of the Mobile police force. Aft
er shooting him. she threw the body
into nearby pond. The crime occurred
at night and the body was found next
morning by passersby.
Mrs. Godau admitted the killing, but
claimed that, after q quarrel with her
on-inlaw, he begged her to kill him,
and she, half crazed, acceded to the re-
quest
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-02-15
COMMON CAR GOOD
ENOUGH FOR RIPLEY,
IN PORTER'S OPINION

SANTA BARBARA, CAL. Feb, la
President e =. Ripley, of the Santa
that occurred at the Southern Pacific
depot here last night. He had gone
to the station to meet his friend, Vic
tor Morawetz whose private car was
expected on one Of the northbound
1raips Stepping zip to negro porter,
Ar. Ripley inquired il a private car
was attached 10 that train
whats the matter with YOU" snap
pod the porter isn't this car good
croagh?"
Mr.. Ripley said nothing, but a local
attachc OF the Southern Pacific over
heard and gave the Santa Re president
the desired information.