The central record. (Lancaster, Ky.) 18??-current, 1913-04-18
IShE GOT RID OF HIM
BY HELEN MILLER.

as they ate their noon sandwiches to-
gether behind the files. 1T nearly
drives a girl crazy trying to discour-
age 'em. l don't know whether they
are so stuck on themselves they can't
believe any human woman wouldn't
choke to death with joy at being no
ticed by them or whether they are just
ordinary stupid. Believe me. l know
after Mr.. Blewer!"
Who's he?" asked the stenographer
from across the hall.
Him." inquired Miss Fattershall,
posing the remnants Of her ham sand
wich daintily in the air. why, Mr..
Blower is the only one out OF cap
tivity, that's who he is-and he just
walled for handouts put on by me,
but | couldn't see it that way-not
with the prospect of Jimmys getting
more pay after New Years! Mr..
Blower Is tall and looks as though
he was vanished. You know that
kind-varnished collar an cuffs, an
hair an teeth an everything!
Il don't believe he ever sat down af-
Ter HIS PlOopSN SAAA 80
got to our house. l never saw such
perfectly immaculate man. There
| wasn't a thing to object to in that
line. He was always just right and l
guess that's why he made me SO
tired
He's manager for the third floor at
Pickles factory and he can take taxi
whenever he wants to. That kind or
dazzled me at first after hanging to
street car strap all the way home,
but constant luxury soon pals.
Il treated that man to more varie-
ties of snubs that you could count and
he lust hung around all the steadier.
When | snapped his head off he mere
Iv murmured that he liked my spark
ling vivacity and when | sulked he
admired my dignified reserve. | for
got engagements with him and he kept
right on asking me. Why, do you
know, if l ever forgot to keep an en-
gagement with Jimmy he'd drop me
like a hot potato! You can't fool
with Jimmy! But Mr. Blower, he just
| came right on. I'd keep him waiting
an hour while l dressed and when |
came down, instead of his gnawing
his cane with rage, I'd find him COM
fortably reading a last months maya
zine.
IF he brought me flowers I'd pin
them on SO they'd drop and get lost
before we were a block away and
when 1t was candy l always gave 1t to
my little brother before him, saying
[ couldn't eat that variety Of bunbuns.
No, / wasn't ashamed of myself, be-
cause he might have had less conceit
and more sense! A perfect lady hasn't
much of any way of telling a man he's
a bore and a back number with her
except by the indirect lighting sys-
tem-and If he's as blind as a bat
that isn't ner fault!
well, / had to get rid of Mr.. Blower
somehow, because Jimmy was begin
ming to paw the air and breathe hard
and | didn't want any duel on our
front doorstep an my picture in the
papers labeled, Beautiful an wealthy
society girl, heroine of romance!
Not for me! l have little pride
left!
How do you suppose l got rid Of
Mr. Blewer-now, honest? Perfectly
simple, my dear, and I'm telling you in
case you get desperate some time
same as | was. ! suddenly began
dropping hints to him what wonder
fully fine cook l was and how hated
pounding a typewriter all day wher
my soul just longed for gas range
and a sack of -four and a recipe book
l said the dream of my life was tt
: have time to cook delicious thing:
that would melt in your mouth and
that sometimes when could persuade
mother to go and visit her sister
got the dinner.
HE actually suffered trying to sa!
fast enough that he'd like so much Il
, be invited to one Of my own dinner
some time, and after hesitating coyl!
, said he might have the chance soon
Mother is peculiar she's so fright
fully honest-so l had to get her GU
of the house before | could turn til.
trick. She nearly gave me heart dis
ease the last minute by saying sh
guessed she wouldn't go to Aun
| Jessie's that day after all-but fina
ly got her started. Maybe l didn'
rush home from the Office that night
7 told my kid brother and sister tina
} if they sn much as peeped at anythin
they had to eat that night l was n
: longer a sister Of theirs-and the
set to Work
"Sugarad the soup and spilled tn
f saltbox iato the boiled cabbage an
: burned the meat till 1t was lik
! leather and favored the gravy wit
vanilla. I'd bet no cannonball wa
ever harifer'n the biscuit turned on
and ! made an apple pie that wa
! lumpy ard half done inside and nc
sweet enough and with a dough
, tough crust-and If there's anythin
! worse than that I'd hate to have
t eat it!
a "Oh, it was a splendid dinner Of II
7 kind and l heapsd that Blower man
D plate. l made him eat two helping
of everything-there was plenty b.
cause the kids couldn't swallow
! thing and stared at me so bewildere
at the handout sister had cooked,
\ nearly died laughing inside!
f Toward the pie Mr.. Blower bega
e getting pale and soon after he sal
!. he must be going. l told him I ha
so enjoyed having him see what
couli do in the culinary line and b
said yes, it had been a wonderful a
! Illuminating experience. And b
hasn't been near me since! Not once