The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-09-04
HELLO BILL! What time ye
got? Three o'clock9 Is it

got! lnTee ClOCk! Is II
that late? Well, l only
slept about-oh, say, about five
minutes, and here it is three O'Clock
in the morning, and-well, there's nc
use taking any more sleep until about
II o'clock tonight. Been to break
fast Bill? Yes,-1-I-yes, under
stand you alright, you had your
breakfast yesterday morning. Come
in the house and have cup of very
fine coffee; it may be little black,
but that's because it isn't daylight and
it has been pretty dark tonight. Show
Bill the coffee, Veaze. Are the girls
about ready to start?" eyes, just as
soon as they get on a little more
powder" You see when people 60
out on camping trip, you've always
got to somewhat spruce up little,
because if there is anything in the
world that a mosquito likes it's pow
der, paint and perfume, and the owls,
as you all know, certainly enjoy look
ing at the palefa6es on a beautiful
moonlight night, as you readily I'M
derstand about them being so observ-
ing, when they say, "Whoo, Whoo,
WHO'D, who in the dickens are you?"
How's that? heard someone ask
where we were going. don't see
them, but I'll tell you anyhow. l
tell you we about drove off without
telling you where we were going.
We had planned a camping trip and
we decided that the Usage river was
the place-at Halley's Bluff. We
had our camping outfit complete
from A to lizard. You all know
what lizard means. Every one ought
to know what that means-if they
don't, III tell you right here and now
you certainly haven't missed any
thing, because l never heard of one
of them in my life and I've lived as
long as anyone my age, but if l ever
see one of them lizards I'll paint an
IL" in front of it and we'll be rid of
one brain wrecker.
Anyhow we had the most complete
camping outfit outside Of the cooks
that was ever perpetrated. Vease
and neither one had time to cook;
we were so busy catching fish. Oh,
yes, we had cooks. l had forgotten
them until Vease jabbed me with his
elbow and said, "Say L. G., you had
better give them honorable mention. :"
So | shall, Mr.. Reader-allow me to
introduce the ladies, Mrs. Bynum and
Mrs. Price.
"All aboard, said Bill. Oh, yes,
don't forget, Bill McClure-he's the
man that took US down, with his big
gray teamand prairie schooner wagon.
We certainly were due there without
a breakdown. Bill is sure there
when it comes to drawing the tape
over horse.flesh.
Well, Bill is ready to start and We'll
have to leave you. Good morning,
you may go to sleep now if you want
to; if you don't, just sit up until you
get ready to. Well, good bye any
how.
Everybody in the wagon and sit
ting comfortable" asked Bill. "Oh,
yes" remarked the girls, and as for
me, was fearfully and wonderfully
surrounded. l performed contortion-
list stunts that many a man has been
paid $500 a week to do got moth
ing. Imagine balancing ones self
with one foot on the spout of coal
oil can, sitting on loaf of bread and
hanging on by both hands to Irvine
string, with a lighted pipe in my
mouth and two ladies' ollering Look
out for the gasoline tank" actually
need medal for rescuing my own
life.
We rode along for mile or two,
and then some more miles and two
hills and hollow, and it was coming
day. The sun arose-that beautiful
summer day and its rays stretched
forth its arms of gold to wrap the
hills and trees which but a few hours
before had been covered with quilt
Of black. Say, wasn't that a hot
one?) Get off my foot-me trying to |
talk nice here about the sunrise and
you girls trying to make me angry.
It's your fault would have had the
sun out from behind thet cloud. but