South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1913-10-18
NEVER SAY DON'T
TO YOUR CHILDREN
Understanding and a Little Pa
tient Explaining Will Save
You From a Lifetime of
"Oont'S."

Never say don't ought to be as much
a watchword as never say die; for
doubtless many persons have suffered
more because someone else had said
don't to them than because they
themselves gave up. and said die.
There was once a certain little boy
of mischievOus and energetic DISPOSE
ton.
What is your little brothers
name?" someone asked the little
boys hitler sister.
Bobby don't" said the little girl in
all sincerity.
From the time she could hear, long
before the time she could talk, she
had heard her mother and her fathe
and her nurse say, Bobby don't.
OF course, to her that was the name
of her idoliZed, If somewhat naughty,
elder brother.
"Dont's" do little good. Like
threats of coming whippings and re-
ports Of naughtiness, to poor, long
suffering, punishment-admini
fathers, dont's, ii used often, lose
their strength and efficiency There
fore. save your dont'S for times when
they are really needed.
OF course little children-big ones,
for the matter Of that, and grown
persons, toO-need to be admonished.
They must be forbidden many things.
They must be frequently told not TO
do things. But they can be told in
other words than oft-repeated
'donts"
Explain to Children.
To begin with, explain your sea-
sons Tor forbidding anything TO a
child. A child can understand rather
deep reasoning long before 1t can eX-
press itself in words of more than
one syllable. Therefore, begin to eX-
plain yourself TO the child even be-
fore there is hope that il will remem-
Der what you say or even understand
all of it,
In the next place give the child
credit with possessing some sense.
Let it know that you expect it to I'M
derstand your reasons for fOrbidding
certain things, and therefore expect
that IL will have sense enough to see
that your reasons are good ones.
When the child comes TO realize that
you explain your reasons and that.
moreover your reasons are sound and
will stand whatever little tests II
may put to them, it will not often
disobey. OF course, II will still do
things that you cannot foresee, things
that will make you wonder at
child's ingenuity in finding so many
forbidden things to do. But patience
and systematic explanation OF SOUND
objections will soon bring the only
sort of obedience that pays-the ODE
dience that comes from understand
ing that some one stronger mentally
and intellectually, not alone physi-
cally is trying to direct the child
Patience and Understanding.
OF course all this brings the ques-
ton down TO the necessity OF almost
understanding, patience
and Solomon-like wisdom on the part
of the parent
If you say Don't, and know not
why you say it, If you give one explain
alton one day and another the next
day and still another the third day, OF
your reasons. for instance, for for
bidding Tommy to pull the cats tail,
or If you put the child OFF without
explanation of any sort before you
have his confidence in your strength
and wisdom, you might as well rec.
oncile yourself to life of repeated
"dont's".
So never say don't. In order not
to do SO. you must needs possess Wis
dom, patience and a sympathy with
the childish point of view. All these
are worth working for, If only be-
cause they bring the privilege of never
saying Don't.