Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1913-01-01
WINNING AN ARGUMENT
BY ALLIE BROCK.

anything of that sort The last time
l was shown up as a false alarm in
applying logic to every day affairs
was no longer ago than yesterday.
when / got home from the city last
evening my wife said to me: There
was man here today to see about
fixing the flower beds and the garden
for the winter He looked so shabby
and sort of homeless that gave him
your other light overcoat.'
THAT ought to be a good start to-
ward getting him a home said in
mirth provoking way. 1t was thought
full move on your part. | suppose you
figured that some lonely widow along
the road would fall in love with him
when she saw the graceful lines of
that coat enfolding him and would
rush out to haul him in
Don't try to be funny said my
wife
what really interest me more
than his immediate future / said, is
the object of his call. Did he wait
long enough to specify what was the
matter with our flower beds that need
ed fixing?'
my wife favored me with the stare
of disdain which she considers espe-
cially cutting and effective against my
kind of sarcasm.
why, l suppose he wants to fix
them up for the winter, she said. I'm
not an expert on such matters, but
have an idea that some sort of atten-
ton must be paid to them before zero
weather comes. ! told the man to
| come back this evening and see you.
There being no adequate reply to
this under the matrimonial code, al
lowed the subject to drop and awaited
my visitor He came with the shad
ows, adorned with my overcoat.
I was wonderin,' he said, if you
wanted your flower beds and your gar
den fixed up for the winter Then he
! leaned restfully against the porch
pillar.
Whats the idea?' I asked. Won't
they be there next spring if I leave
! them alone all winter
| eyes, but you don't understand,
the tired citizen explained They
ought to be bedded down with ferti-
! lizer-spaded up and covered over
the way they fix EN- in the parks
land then what?' | demanded. The
light of my household was listening
from the darkness of the hall and l
wanted her to see the uselessness of
the appointment she had made for me.
"'Then your flowers and vegetables
will have big start next spring, the
| horticulturist explained, because the
ground will be ready for 'em. I do
this every year for most of the PEG
pie in this town. I charge a dollar for
my time and you pay for the fertilizer
| and stuff
See here, you imitation gardner I
marked after I had glared at him
! moment, you're the worst booster for
yourself that ever came down that
road out there. Your efforts to get
a dollar out of me are so feeble and
amateurish that I'd have laugh all to
myself if l wasn't getting sort of tired
! of your kind of cattle.
| "'You've got a lot of nerve to say
that you bed down the vegetable gar
| dens of most of the people in this
town every year, so they'll be ready to
do business with rush in the spring
! time I told him. Why, there isn't
another suburb on this branch of the
! railroad that turns out such worth
+ less lot of garden truck as this one
Now l know what's the matter
it's all your fault If you'd keep your
hands off the gardens and let things
alone people might have a chance to
raise few spring onions at cost of
not more than Sc a dozen, and we
might even get an occasional radish
that wasn't a soggy sponge. Not con-
tent with getting my fall overcoat by
merely standing around and looking
| frostbitten, you expect me to give you
a dollar for taking exercise that would
keep you warm while you are spelling
my garden'
MY caller shifted his weight to the
other foot and looked uncomfortable
for a few seconds, but he was ready
with his defense.
We'll he said, "a mans got to
live
"'There!' my wife exclaimed tri-
umprantly from the darkness behind
me- That's the point you always over
| look
so this morning that depressed
, person was busy in our garden with
spade and wheelbarrow when / left
home. Lovely woman may not be
strong on the finer points of logic,
but she certainly has the gift of win
ming in any argument. "-Chicago
Daily News.