The Washington times., 1913-01-27
SUFFRAGETTESW WIN
CLEAN VICTORY At
M0hUS BANQUET
KNOCKERS" Club of Printers
Lives Up to Its Name, Hit
ting Hard at Guests.

A clean victory was won by the suf-
fragettes when. with banners flying
and band playing. they. captured the
annual dinner of the knights of Momus
last night. and, forcing Walter Wick.
vice president OF the inaugural commit
tee. into corner, made him sign petit
ton asking tor everything the suffra-
gettes wanted during the inaugural
festivities. Led by Mrs. Clara Naecker.
who announced that she had all the
celebrities In Washington in line behind
her, the 'suffragettes' marched around
the banquet hall in Rauscher's and car
ried everything before them. When Mr..
Wick finally signed the petition, Mrs
Naecker rewarded him by singing
You're NY Baby"
After Mrs. Naecker left the hall.
every knight grabbed a sledge hammer,
and the real hammering Of the evening
began. Everything from the Panama
canal to the new form Of neckties re-
ceived its little welt, and those who did
not bear away the marks Of the mallet
felt that they had been slightee- No
skulls were cracked, but II there had
been a chesty feeling about the high
browed guests" when they arrived, 1t
would have suffered.
Tramp Invades Hall.
Just as the diners settled down and
they were rather good-natured toward
each other at first, a tramp looking as
IL he had been put through course IN
the college Of alcoholism, broke into the
banquet hall He refused to be put out
saying that he was printer on the
road, and would, on the strength OF J.
P. Morgan's saying that he would
rather lend a million dollars to man
with character than on the best COL
lateral, like to have the Endorsement OF
the knights In order to secure the loan:
An imitation OF Mr.. Morgan arose anu
gave the tramp a check for mlihoh;
After the gallery was - ciearSe: Ss.an sne reHt
When the cigars began to bloom
about the hall the toastmaster rose,
and. saying that the knights wanted 70
know who were candidates Tor the ?oo
of Public Printer, SO they mngns IN.
dorse him, asked that the candioates
rise. Immediately the full membership
Of knightI rose. After looking over tne
candidates the toastmaster ordered al
TO cit down except those VINO tnoushl
they had a chance for the Posllon;
a
Black-and- Blue, chairman OF the Swindle
Service Commission, put the remaining
candidates through a short examina-
ton, getting the following answers.
Some Definitions.
public Printer-A highbrow from Bos-
tom or a freak from the Philippines"
"Printer-Not a politicians dipio-
mat"
..s,xie hook-A sacred scare that
casts the Government thousands OF del
lars to keep up-to-date, and by the rules
Of which donkey, donnyprook, anu
dongola must be printed In caps >,
Proof reader-A printer WIN q pun,
Congressman Shereley OF Kentucky
vas scheduled to make speech pug
when his time came he stated tnat IN
view of the old saying that no man was
a hero TO his valet, he was convinced
that no Congressman could pe : ssa.sss IS
Congressional Record and he was
afraid to speak.
Kahn Retires, Indignant.
Senator Reed Smoot came TO his res
cue and, until the hammer fell showing
that his time was up, told a number OF
stories which were not even knocked
Congressman Julius Kahn tried to
make a speech and the toastmaster
hammered him down with the gavel,
NtIch looked like a bungstarter. Con-
gresham Kahn stated that ne mao
heen tnsuIted and left the hall, but a
few minutes later was brought back
smiling and seemingly happy.
Others who spoke were Samuel Com
pers. Willis L. Moore, Congressman
Victor Murdock, Congressman Sisson,
ana F. n Whitehead. who told story
IN regard to the thriftiness Of Congress
man kahn which the latter later
branded as a proper admission card TO
the Ananias club.