davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Smokes Cigar While His Zoe Is Being Cut Off

The physician was not prepared for
such ready response and suggested
that next day would be better time.
When Shively arrived at the hospital
he was enjoying a good cigar-in fact,
he had negotiated Jn:" about half an
inch Of it. and as there was about
live inches of good smoke remain
ing, he was loath to part with It. He
states positively that he had no in
tention of pulling off any heroics. and
the only reason he chung to the CT
gar was that it happened to be-
mighty good one. He was hustled
into the operating room. and he never
flinched while the toe was being re-
moved, following light local applica-
ton Of cocaine.
AS fer his refusal to take an anes-
thetic. Senator Shively claims no
credit on that account.
There are two ways of rendering
a man insensible to pain" said the
senator. "One way 10 to take a base
ball bat or big stick and hit him a
resounding blow on the head. The
other way is to give him an anesthet-
ic. In the first case he is apt to
have a mighty sore head for time
after returning to consciousness. In
the latter case there will be q sicken-
ing aftermath Of nausea that Is al
most unbearable. In either case it is
complete knockout My personal
preference is to endure the pain while
the operation is in progress
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
RIDDLES.

Why is black woman like a door
way?
Because she Is negress ian
egress).
Why do cabmen prefer tall ladies'
to short ones?
Because the higher the fare {fair)
the better they like it.
Why is newly married couple like
a pair of sugar tongs?
Because they are two spoons joined
Why was Noah the greatest finan.
cier on record?
Because he kept his company Nim-
ited) afloat when the rest Of the world
was in liquidation.
What did Adam and Eve do when
they were expelled from Eden?
They raised CAIN
Why are washerwomen foolish?
Because they set tubs to catch soft
water when it rains hard.
When does chair resemble a lady's
dress?
When it is sat in.
Why are laundresses good nayiga-
tors?
Because they are always crossing
the line and going from pole to pole
Why did nurse object to take baby
into papa's studio?
Because them easels" (the meas
les) were about.
Why should doctors be less liable
than others to be upset on the ocean
Because they are more used to see
sickness.
Why is govt like reciprocated love!
Because it's joint affection.
Why should soldiers be rather tired
on the first of April?
Because they have just had a march
Of thirty-one days.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14

Did you ever try a mining case?"
shouted Mr.. Ashurst, after the sands
III the dictionary began to run low.
do you mean to insult me?"
shrieked Secretary Fisher, who was
admitted to the bar twenty-five years
ago.
1t was explained by the angry sen
ator thai he did not intend to insult
the secretary, but that he really
thought the head of great executive
department should have little horse
sense: it would not impair his useful
ness, and might prove wonderfully
helpful "a mining decisions.
In turn the secretary intimated to
the superh2ated senator that he was
weary OF Seeding and denunciation.
He conveyed the impression that the
senator might find a number OF suit
able climates, but all Of them were
outside his office.
This broke up the party. The sen
ator backed through the door. she
secretary looked out of the window
unit! he saw the visitor stalking
down the street, Geing determined to-
guard against flank movements and
rushes.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14

deserving the site. Usually two roos:
in the same tree. During a recent
heavy snowstorm DR.. Blair directed
my attention to two male peafowl that
had selected a big oak tree near his
office window as a perching place.
The snow had fallen during the night
to a depth of about ten inches. form
ing a wall on each side of the sleep
ing birds. which completely arched
over their backs. As, the heat of their
bodies melted the snow the water had
gradually saturated their lighter feath.
ers and formed a tiny coronet of ice
on their heads. As we watched them
they stood erect, as if to learn just
what the prospect of moving might
be. The effort probably convinced
them that an attempted fight to the
ground meant tumble and not fly,
for they promptly settled down again
for another nap.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
-. Z, - Es Ez&sE- J.
SCREENING
/&,H& q
l,ITTLEONES
POWER OF FARM-BRED BOYS
Unlike the City Youth, He Is Not Cod
died Nor Helped Over the Many
Rough Places.

The farm is the place to give a
boy a good start in life. 1t is there
that he learns independence Of
thought and action. He is not coddled
nor helped over the rough places as
the city boy is. He is forced to de-
pend upon himself: and at the age
when the city boy is tied to nurses
apron strings, the country lad not
only takes care of himself. but often
assists materially in the farm work.
He rides horseback, goes atield
with a team. investigates the habits
of birds and animals, acquires thirst
for knowledge.
The city boy moves in grooves that
have been cut out for him by custom;
he is herded in the city cars; he must
follow the crowd in the streets. His
vision is bounded by the lines OF high
buildings; he never sees a sun rise, or
set; he is bound down by prejudices;
dwarfed by mannerisms and consumed
by customs. The farm boy dreams
of the outside world which he has
never seen, strains at the tether OF
his hum-drum duties and signs for
bigger worlds to conquer. He is hight
ing battles while pitching hay and
manipulating railroads while running
the reaper.
When he finally breaks away and
comes to the city he is fortified with
rugged health, courage and independ-
ence: the world looks easy to him.
He is often disappointed. but he makes
his dreams come true.
He is used to hardships; does not
whine when he is knocked down IN
the strife Of the big city: he has
learned to depend on his own re-
sources; he has physical power and
intellectual elements to win over OBJ
stacles that would down the city boy.
The country is inspiring; the city Is
enervating and surfeiting The coun-
try teaches the boy push and perse-
yerance and determination.
He learns philosophy and truth, so.
when he comes to the big city he is
strong and capable.
Many of the really big men who
dominate the affairs in the big cities
came from the farm. 1t is stated as
a fact that seven-tenths Of the men
who control the banks and railroads
and other great industries Of Chicago.
New York and other great centers of
business, are farm-bred.
But the demand for good men on
the farms is also iEsistent. Boys who
remain in the country and make the
most OF their opportunities cannot
help but succeed in the calling as
honorable and useful as any other.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
THE BAROMETER OF THE POST
OFFICE, THE READING OF
WHICH SHOWS WESTERN
CANADA'S GROWTH.

Several Of Western Canada news.
papers coming to hand during the
last part Of the year 1912 contained
items of news such az the following,
speaking of the Christmas work in
the postoffice:
"Other years have been heavy and
the employees have had plenty of op-
portunity Of learning what it was to
work overtime, but the past has had
nothing equal to the present. Forty
extra men have been employed Tin
Winnipeg), and mail trains have been
run special. The increase in the mail
this year has been due to the enor-
nous influx Of people into Western
Canada during the season, and also
the general prosperity which the
prairie provinces have enjoyed. TO
the latter cause has been due the
heavy increase in the number Of par
GELS which have been shipped to the
old country and Eastern Canada"
The above extract taken from a
Winnipeg paper gives Il fair idea Of
the great work that the Canadian
postoffices have had all through the
western prairies. During the past
year hundreds Of new postoi1ices were
established, many of them at remote
points from the railway, but all forced
upon the country on account Of the
new settlements that have taken
place during the year. 1t is said Of
the Canadian government that in its
immigration and settlement policy
there is nothing left undone to take
care OF the people and their welfare,
whether it be in the new town along
a new line Of railway or in the re-
hottest hamlet. This solicitude and
care arc not confined to the postof.
fee, but with every branch that has
to do with organizing new districts.
Bridges have been built, roads con-
structed, the district policed, and a
dozen other things have to be done
and are done. Is it any wonder that
with the splendid land, the high
yielding lard, the lard that is free to
the homesteadcr or open to purchase
at reasonable prices from the railway
and land companies. that the Cana
dian immigration records for 1914
will show arrivals Of upwards Of
100000. one-half Of this being from the
United States. The new literature
being sent out by the immigration
branch at Ottawa, and its agencies
throughout the United States deals
with many Of the new and interesting
features that will mark the work Of
that branch for tho year 1913.-Ad'
vertisement.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14

NJ ASHINGTON.-Sena Shively OF
" indiana looms up as a real hero
f7e refused 10 take an anesthetic and
smoked placidly a long black cigar
while surgeons cut off one Of his toes
And the senator. despite the enco~
mlums that are coming his way, is
modest about it. He would have pre-
ferred that his heroism should have
gone unsung, but the facts about the
scene in the operating room finally
leaked out an6 the senator finds him.
self in receipt Of letters from various
parts Of the country commencing his
nerve" and expressing the view that
he has about the right sort Of stuff
In his makeup.
When Senator Shively made up bis
mind that a surgical operation was
necessary he confided his view to his
physician, Or. z. T. Sewers. who
agreed with him.
When will you be ready to have
the toe taken off," asked the doctor.
This evening"" answered the SEN
QtO~.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Labors and Meanings.

Rockefeller can write a few words
on a sheet of paper and make it
worth $4,000. That's capital.
The United States can take an ounce
and a quarter of gold, stamp an
'eagle' on it, and make it worth 500
That's money.
A mechanic can take material worth
S. and make watch springs worth
$1,000 That's skill.
A woman can purchase a hat for
s., but prefers one which costs $50.
That's foolishness.
A ditch digger works ten hours
day and handles several tons of dirt
for 1925. That's labor.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Senator and Cabinet Minister in Word Duel

A STORMY verbal encounter be-
~ tween a cabinet minister and
senator Of the United States FUR lshed
7 morse! OF gossip here the otht! day
First reports from the field Of .::rnage
wer, that the cabinet minist:' bodily
threw the senator out of his Office
This was later modified to Il duel OF
rot words.
Senator Ashurst Of Arizona thinks
the mining laws are something afro
cious. even when properly enforced.
When decisions are rendered under
this s:ct he can find no expressions to
cope s,'Ah the situation. One OF these
cbnorio-p opinions was handed down
and Mr. Ashurst clear:d his decks
Cor sction and sailed Gown to the in
terror department. This was not his
first set-to with Secretary Fisher and
he did rot quote poetry or tender d
holiday greeting.
1t Is admitted on both sides that
Senator Ashu:st was polite though
angry. The secretary was suffering
rrora an ingrowirg crouch. Neither
used his Sunday voice.
The senator told he secretary that
in his humble Judgment the decision
rendered against his constituent was
the most unjust. unsalted. unripe and
swaNbacked distortion Of law and COM
:nc: sense into which he had ever
bumped
Tho secretary informed the senator
that ;hc opinion was twenty karat
fine. platinum tipped, warranted to
keep Mt the equator and in accord
nnco with law and practice.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Touching the Cardinal.

At the Democratic convention in
Baltimore last summer two of the ser.
geants-at-arms were Ohioans, COL John
Bolan Of Toledo and Capt. Joseph
Bowling Of Dayton. Bolan is the wit
who laid down the maxim that fanny
uan who parts his hair in the middle
is no Dimmycrat."
When Cardinal Gibbons had finish
ed the opening prayer, he descended
from the rostrum and made his way
toward the door. AS he neared the
exit where the two Ohioans were on
guard, Bolan whispered:
Joe, touch him whin he passes
ye."
"All right. colonel" replied Bowling,
with an inocent air. What pocket
has he got it in?"-Popular Maya.
zine.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
LET GOOD CHANCE GO BY
Buffers Had Perfect Right to Be Mad.
Considering the Extremely IN.
fortunate Circumstances.

Buffers bounced into the club,
damned his hat down on a table with
a fierce, resounding bang, and flung
himself into an easy chair.
whats wrong today. Buffers?
Tou look bad"
I'll never forgive myself. / kicked
y man out of my house last night"
"Humph! I've kicked out many a
ana Young fellow, suppose?"
mo; past middle age"
well, these old dodgers have no
business to be coming round counting
young girls. would have kicked him
out myself"
Eyes, but I have found out since
that this man wasn't counting my
daughter. He was after my mother
in-laW.'
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Her Solicitude.

Katherine is 21A years old. Her
,ather came home one afternoon, aft
er working three days and three
Nights at high pressure, with almost
no sleep. He lay down with the feel
ing that he did not want to wake up
Tor a week. Half an hour later, from
the depths Of his dreams, he heard a
small, clear voice. "Father!"
The sleeper stirred, and turned his
aead on the pillow.
Father! father!"
He stirred again, and moaned.
Father! father!"
He struggled anc resisted and foun-
dered, and finally raised his eyelids
like man lifting heavy weights. He
saw Katherine smiling diyinely beside
his couch.
Father! father!"
What is it, daughter?"
Father, are you having a nice
nap?:"-Youth's Companion.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Power, Say Scientists

turned and pushed the book over with
his nose.
Jasper obeyed commands tina. he
had never heard before. this. q number
OF the scientists said. proved that Jas
per has reasoning power that is ab.
normally developed, going far beyond
the range of pure animal instinct or
acquired training
Mr.. Taylor says that Jasper is lust
dcg'-plain everyday mongrel. half
English bull and half Italian grey.
hound. two and one-half years old.
At Professor Bells part, Jasper, act.
ing under orders lifted eyeglasses
from the noses of guests and did other
stunts that he had not been trained
to do.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
A Neat Trick.

Place three small biscuits on the tz
BILE in a row and cover each of them
with borrowed hat.
Raise each hat in turn, gravely ca,
the biscuit, and with appropriate pat
ter and suggestion Of sleight OF
hand replace the hat.
Now undertake that the three bis
cults shall be under whichever hat the
audience may Select. This promise Is
easily fulfilled by placing the chosez
hat upon your head.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
This DOG Has Reasoning

fASFER, an educated Cog. entertain
~ ed a party Of scientists at the
Smithsonian institution the other day.
He was examined by DR.. Frank Baker.
1oologist. and Charles D. Walcott. Sec
Rotary Of the institution. and described
rs "vonderful."
It was demonstrated that Jasper is
familiar with 300 words and that he
understand any reasonable command
given by his master Dixie Taylor
The following night Jasper was the
guest of homer at party Of scientists
given by Prof. alexander Graham
Bell.
For the edificat;on Of the Smithson-
ian staff, the dog wrote on type
writer, distinguished between man"
and woman" picked up bits OF paper
and put them either in cuspidor or
4 waste basket as directed TO do,
Go into the room across the hall.
fin. a typewriter, and write" said Mr..
Taylor to the dog.
The dos obeyed. undirected.
Look out the window and then
pnsh this book ovcf." said MIR. Taylor.
placing a book on it's end on the floor.
The dog looked out OF the window.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
PEAC0CKS BOOSTED IN SNOW
Them Much Discomfort, but
Didn't Disturb Slumbers.

The hereditary habit of the pea
cocks OF roosting for the night in trees
sometimes forces upon them consider.
able discomfort. After selecting a
roosting place. says Dumb Animals,
the birds return to it each night. ap-
parently the same ones, without ever
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Burdens of Wealth

wealth doesn't always bring happi-
ness" remarked the youngster with
the large spectacles.
NO. asserted the other kid. Look
at me cousin yonder. He's got two
cents and he can't decide between lol-
ltpops and ice cream."-plttsburg
Post
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Solved.

Twelve persons for dinner! Aren't
you crazy?"
I'VE might invite thirteenth; that
would perhaps take away their agpe-
tite."
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Partial Success.

DO YOU believe in those faith
cures?'
"Oh, I have known some that cured
faith in them"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
DIFFICULT PUZZLE TO SOLVE
Square Of sixty-Four Cells Must BE
Cut into Four Parts With Num-
bered Cell ia Each.

Cut the square of 81 cells into four
parts that are exactly alike in size
and shape.
Each Of these four pieces must con-
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
90 E'ro the sordid and ofter tragic
business Of seeking public Offices

- :. / - me SCTGlu ana OIto'l tragic
1 business Of seeking public Offices
there sometimes intrudes An element
OF the romantic All quite frequently
Of the comic" SAD {; United States
senator ism a southern state
Mo- LONG ago l got letter from
hungry Democrat. a loyal supporter O:
mine. Who advised me that he would
ike K, set the appointment OF commits
sionrt' Of the United States patent Of
fce. Hut h wanted me to understand
that !his desire Oh his part was not
70 b" construed as any evidence that
he would dec!ic" the offer Of postmas-
ter Of the village in which he lived
Another enc OF my fellow citizens who
hat.. a.; supposed. written and asked
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
s [a[@I9]
[xl0IoTx1x]x1XIo1
[<lQ1o Ix1H]%1x

Solution Of Puzzle.
four parts, exactly alike in shape and
size
Each piece contains one of the num-
5ered cells.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Very Much So.

Very Much So.
I've been having a bowling time"
'Wnat have you been doing:"
I've been taking candy f>o.a a
baby"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14

Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets regulate and
invigorate stomach, liver and bowels Sugar
coated, tiny Granules, easy to take. Do not
grippe Adv.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
The Heioht of Abaurditv

The Height Of Absurdity.
your scheme is foolish
"FOolish?"
"Yes, sir, absolutely foolish. AS
foolish as-well, as foolish as the
libretto of grand opera"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Swat Indirect

Swat Indirect.
Mandy-What fob 20 ben goin' to
de postoffice so regular? Are yo' cor
respondin' wifi some other female?"
Rastus-"Nope: but since ah been a.
readin' in de papers bout desc con-
science funds alb kind of thought ali
might possibly git a lettah from dat
ministah what married us."-Life.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
The Kind.

The Kind.
1T IS hard to handle children with
gloves
1T @ugh: to be easy with kid
siovss.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1913-02-14
Usual Results,

Usual Results.
Did the girls get a hint Of our 80
"et?"
"Ye-with telling effect"
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1913-09-02
; UNA GUERRA EN- PERSPECTIVA!
La question de Mejico.

Nueva York. 81 Ell goblerno me.
iicano ha dado nuevas dlsposlclones
sobre la movilizacion de tropas orde-
nando que Sc ponga en- servicio actlyo
a las reservas y que a la vez Sc adlesstre
en- ell manejo de las armas de combate
4 todos los ciudadanos de la republlca
ule. teniendo de Is so amos de edad,
no Sc halle impedido fisicamente.
Asi mismo, el gobierno meJicano ha
establecido cuarteles generates Ell los
pueblos de la costa y en- los que Sc ha-
llan en- la frontera, manifestando que
esta actitud obedece a la necesldad
existente de defenderse de los contra
bandistas.
Ell presidente del Senado de Mejico
ha protestado de la retirada de los clu-
dadanos nOrteamericanOs RESIDENCES cn
dicho pals declarando que la colonia
norteamericana esta satisfecha y tran
quila.
En- los Estad0s Unidos Sc Juzga que
la retirada de los s1bditos de esta re-
publica es de graves perJuicios econ6-
micos para Mejico
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1913-09-02
a8-----sITs----
MOTIN DE HUELGUISTAS
EN- IRLANDA,
30 policias y 500 huelguistas lesionados.

Nueva York, 10. septiembre.- En-
Dublin, Irlanda, han ocurrido serios
dlsturbios Ell los d1as 30 y 81 de agosto
con motive de la huelga que han plan
teado los empleados de los tranvlas.
Al lntervenir Ell ell movimiento la poll
cla, Sc hbraron serias batallas campa.
les Ell las que Sc disparaban tiros de
ambas parties lanzando los obreros DO
tellas pledras y ladrillos contra la fuer-
"a publica. De la refriega resultaron
300 paisanos y 30 policlas heridos le-
slonados Los hospitales de la pobla-
clon estan atestados de victimas.