South Bend news-times., 1913-12-01
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STATESMEN REAL AND "
NEAR. \
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BY FRED C. KELLY.

BY FRED c. KELLY.
WASHINGTON. .. c., Nov. 30
This is to deal with the horrible mis-
take made by former Secretary of
War Henry l.. Stimson when he had
his official portrait painted.
The portrait now adorns the walls
OF the outer office of the secretary
of war, face to face with pictures Of
Edwin NJ. Stanton. William Tecumseh
sherman, and other grave old war
secretaries and war heroes There
the picture is to remain through the
succeeding ages. as a constant source
of inspiration and comfort TO the
young of our broad land
Now let us suppose that YOU were
about to have your protrait there. 1t
Is TO be painted, mind you, not by the
man who paints pictures on the sides
or ice wagons and on saloon mirrors.
but by high-priced artist and the
result is to be permanent. You can't
come around in a few weeks and sit
again. Doubtless, in view of the COM
pany in which YOU are to be thrown
you would wish TO glare forth from
those walls just as sOlemnly as any
body. When the painter got ready
to use you for his target. you would
indu bitably put on your best clothes
high collar, roach your hair back
in neat, conservative fashion, and try
to look as dignifedly smart as if you
had just that minute arrived at the
solution Of an intricate problem in
higher mathematics.
Did Henry l.. StimsOn approach the
situation in any such attitude as that?
NO, frankly he did not. Instead of
getting out his Sabbath clothes when
the painter came around. he determin-
ed that he would make himself instru-
mental in Frightening up the portrait
gallery OF the war department, and
he hunted up the most ornate riding
clothes he had. His family tried 10
demonstrate with him but he had his
mind made up to go down to posterity
looking like the cover design of the
midsummer fiction number OF a 10
cent magazine. He put on a pair of
tan riding breeches a yellow coat, a
gallery vest. a stock in place of a
collar. seized his riding crop, clutched
his gloves jauntily in one hand, jabbed
thumb OF that hand into side coat
pOcket-which gives an effect only a
trife less iaunty than slapping ones
gloves against the thigh-and then he
stepped up before the printer and
bade him do his worst.
The result is a work that seems to
have been done by Harrison Fisher In
collaboration with George Barr Nc
CutcheOn and Richard Harding Davis.
II one didn't know It was StimSon
one would say just offhand that the
mans name was Cecil Mainwaring or
| Algy Trevor. and that i'm the closin 2
chapter he will be forced into mar
riage with an athletic young creature
named Mathilde van Tulle. Certainly
enc would never suspect from the pic
ture that Stimson's name is Henry.
AS a matter Of fact. this tendency
toward ornate portraiture in the war
department gallery was started by no
less a person than William Howard
Taft Up until the time Taft retired
as secretary Of war, the pictures there
had been either in army uniform or
in the conventional black-but always
sombre Taft's dOuble-width picture
shows him in q light blue coat, white
vest and red peCktie. This color gay
ETY. on the part of his predecessor may
have been Stimson's inspiration
Whatever may have given StimsOn
his notion. our prediction is that with
in two or three years his better tudg-
ment viii once more gain control OF
the delegates whereupOn he will come
! around cOaxing for the privilege OF
taking his picture away and storing
ii in some good. quiet attic. But II
viii be too late.
old Marc Smith. who is one OF the
senators from Arizona. smokes pom
derOus big black he-cigars, and
smokes them practically all the time.
Sen. Tllman. on the other hand. quit
smoking for his health's sake some
time ago. and never touches a cigar. A
/ short time again Tillman and Smith
were both seated. with other SEN
atorS, i'm a little committee room.
Marc Smith. Of course. was smoking.
Tillman might as well have smoked
! himself. as every breath he took sat
uratcd his insides with the smoke
/ Marc Smith was providing for the en-
7 tire company. lie complained 20
I Smith about this. Whereupon the
| Arizona senator said.
"Tillman. when YOU talk that way
feel toward you almost as the man
/ did whose wife was sick SO long The
man said. YOU know. that he wished
/ she'd either get well or-or do some
thing"
! Pres. Wilson has a habit OF writing
! statements 20 himself He does Il Just
as matter OF having memoranda on
/ file, and 70 refresh his memory on
what has gone before.
| The other day a report got out that
4 the president was about 10 take the
| whole country into his confidence on
! the Mexican situation. A well-authen-
| ticated rumor come from the white
| house Offices that he was at work or