davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05
SMILES.
BY The Second Ward Bard.
HOW I'VE REFORMED.

! g. . 4
HOW I'VE REFORMED.
! You never make a hit by being
grouchy or severe,
You never make a friend by being
,gium,
! There isn'i much that's lucky in 3
( frowa or in tear,
And if you make it pay you're
! going some.
Now 1 am old, MY joints are stiff and
I'm about all in,
The rheumatic has got hold on me,
But no one wants to hear me On the
corner stand and chin
About my suff'ring and infirality.
And yet 1t was not ever thus, for
once I used to tei-
Each neighbor whom I'd met up
on the street,
Just how far Off I was removed
from being strong and well,
And how l used to suffer with m!
feet.
And how my liver wouldn't work
and how my weakened back
Was nearly broken with its load o!
pain,
And how the grim, destroying cousl
my system used to rack,
And how the govt was driving mt
insane.
Of course, l was an awful bo"e, anc
so one bright spring Morn
A neighbor waited for me wi h
club,
And gave me what I'd needed ever,
since l had been born,
And convinced me that l was
hopeless dub.
So now am more cheerful, AMI J
have friends by the score.
And if I'm i'll I think it is m,
fault,
These days I keep my troubles t
myself, and wha: is more
I'm not in daily danger Of as&!uli
Ii there is anything in a name, w
would quit writing verses just a:
soon as Charley Tcnnesson got s.art
Ged
If you put Peek Of feed on toy
Of Fohl, would the Woolf a. tho
door jump after it and fall into thc
Pitts you had dug for him?
The fellow VINO can calmly lay
down a hand with four aces ! i
and look bored while he is light g
cigarette, hasn't got q thing C the
guy who can discuss church ri
with his pastor and hope the eoo'
man won't smell that drink h. ha:
had q few minutes before.
Poor old Tige is nluzZled nov,
He's gloomy as can be
No living thing can interest h!-2
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05
ening Boss Barnes. Better mind what
he says, Mr.. Barnes. He's regular
little buzz-saw when he gets started.

Those women-folks are having such
a time over that Democratic breakfast
chat it makes us wonder what they
would do with tariff bill.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

The fact that New York candy
manufacturer was fined because dirt
and human hair was found in his can
dy is not going to make the girl tur,I
down any of those fve-pound boxes
c. !Iuyler's.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05
EDITORIAL BRIEFS.

The farmer whose calf ate up a
pocketbook with $500 in it is going t
fell pretty sick about selling that yea
for ten cents a pound.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

A Boston janitor has fallen heir to
a fortune of half Ia million dollars.
Now he'll begin to see some eeaes in
That argument that there is not
enough heat in the fiat.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

The sardine crop of Europe is re-
ported a failure. However, we ex-
pect the sucker catch is about up to
standard.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

Professor Taft is probably warning
the boys not to be late getting back
after recess.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

Poor old Tige is nuzZled nov,
He's gloomy as can be
No living thing can interest h!-a
Except, of course, flea.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

Entered at the Postoffice of Alex.
andria, Virginia as second-class mat
ter.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

And HOW Governor Sulzer is threat
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05
ALEXANDRIA GAZETTE.
PUBLISHED DAILY.

The Alexandria Gazette Corporation.
Gazette Building King Street.
ROBERT S. BARRETT, President.
and General Manager.
HOWARD W. SMITH, Secretary and
Treasurer.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

TERMS:-Daily, l year, $500
Six Months, $3.50. Three Months,
S1.25. One month, 49 cents. One week
10 cents.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

If you put a Peck of feed on to-
of a Poll, would the Woolf a. tn
dccr jump after it and fall into III
Pitts you had dug for him?
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1913-04-05

Ii there is anything in name, W
would quit writing verses just a
soon as Charley Tcnnesson got s.art
eed.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
INTERIOR WORKERS
GIVEN PROMOTIONS
Secretary Lane Announces
Number in Geological Survey
and Reclamation Service.

A number Of promotions in the Geo.
logical Survey and the Reclamation
Service were made by Secretary of the
Interior Lane today.
In the Survey Gerald A. Waring of
California, is promoted from assistant
geologist to geologist at 2,l6O year. and
Arthur E. Faith, of Illinois, is promoted
from geologic aid to assistant geologist
at s., 200.
In the Reclamation Service, William
G.. Hawles, of Nevada, a craftsman,
is promoted from 81 $50 to S1,6s0; Julian
Hunds, of Washington. from Junior
engineer at $3.50 to assistant engineer
at Loo; Lucian H. Thaden, of the
District. craftsman, from $500 to 81. $50;
John J. Fuller, of the District, drafts
man. sl,0so to N,liO; Robert R. Hoge,
James V. Ryan, of Illinois. clerk, s1,2oO
OF Oregon, clerk to sI,14O. to clerk
s1.2Oo: Harry A. Muliigan. of Connecti-
cut, H,020 10 Sl,2OO; George +. Cook, of
syivania, clerk, 1920 to sl.l40: Elmer
5. Mcintosh. Of Virginia, messenger,
$500 to $72o; Paul J. Leverone, of the
District. messenger. $40 to 5000; Wal
ter Pack. of the District. photographer
District assistant map printer, $3.50 to
$40; Leo c. Monnie, of Pennsylvania,
trained nurse, sl,0S0 10 s., 200.
Arthur e. Dennis, Minnesota; Wilson
B. Emery. Connecticut; Ralph W. How
ell. New York; Ronald V. Mills, New
York; Wallace Lee. Missouri; Walter a
English. California: Charles R. Fettke.
New York; Stuart st. Clair. Iowa: New
dell p. Woodring, Maryland: William T.
Thom, jr., Virg-Na, and Raymond G.
Moore, Ohio. have been appointed geol-
ogic aides in the geological survey Orln
j. Rudy, of the District. has been ap-
pointed messenger at $500.
Ralph W Richards, associate geolog-
ist at $500, and Charles H. Gordon, as
sistant geologist have resigned.
Joseph d. Eggleston chief of the field
service in rural education of the Bu-
His position pays 1900 a year
Adam Z. Eby, of Idaho, has been ap-
pointed messenger in the Reclamation
Service.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
SECTION GETS NAME
OF "HOODOO zONE"
Four Fatalities Within Month
Mark Region Along River and
Conduit Road,

Four fatalities in as many weeks in
the region along the river and Con-
duit road from Chain Bridge to Cab
In John Bridge, one of the most, pic
turesIue sections about the District,
frequented by thousands of pleasure
seekers. are earning for this section
the title of the ''hoodoos zono." Aside
from the fatalities there have been
many serious accidents and narrow
escapes in this territory
On June 17Miss Edna l. Turnburke.
school teacher. jumped from Chain
bridge into the turbulent waters be-
low. On July 1. Bernard sherwood.
In collision with a garbage driven
by Mrs. Richard Saunders. Of Poto-
mac. Md. was fmpaled upon a shaft.
In the next week Miss Clara E. Ward
jumped from a canoe into the Chesa-
peak and Ohio canal and was
drowned. and Conductor Scala, of the
Glen Echo car line. fell from the run
ming board of his car and was killed.
The number oil fatalities and acci-
dents is no doubt In a large measure
due TO the fact that this section Is
the city's summer outing ground. the
river, canal, amusement parks. and
the finest driveway In this section all
attracting their devotees, with canoe.
motor, and horse drawn vehicles.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
ATTHEWS BECOMES
MONEY ORDER CHIEF
Has Had Rapid Rise in the
Postoffice Department Since
Entering the Service.

Charles z. Matthews, former super
intendent of the division of accounts in
the postal savings system, was yesterday
sworn in as superintedent of the money
order division of the Postoffice Depart
ment A number of department officials
and clerks were on hand to congratu-
late Mr.. Matthews when he took tie
oath of office in his new position.
Mr.. Matthews has had a remarkable
rise in the Postoffice Department, and
in the last few months has jumped
from an s.. 500 clerkship to chief of the
money order division at a salary of
$500 year.
In this new office he will have super
vision over transactions that involve
more than $4,000, 000,0O annually. Last
year 1,019 142 40 foreign and domestic
money orders were issued by United
States pcstoffices, for an amount aggre-
eating approximately nine billion dol
lars. The money order office must keep
track of each of these transactions and
guard the Government and the public
as well against any loss.
Mr. Matthews entered the Government
service as a clerk in the office of the
auditor for the Postoffice Department
in August, 1895. He served in the
money order division of this office
until February, lSll, Wnen ne was tTdnS-
ferred to the Postoffice Department
as a 1000 clerk in postal savings. Soon
after entering the office. he was pro-
NOTED to an $3.50 cierkship. for unusual
ability.
Because of his qualifications and
adaptability he was soon placed in
charge of the .division of accounts in
the postal savings system at a salary of
$2,5n. When Postmaster General
Burieson some time ago appointed
committee to investigate and recrgan-
ize the postal savings system, Mr.. Mat
thews was named as one of the mem-
bers and again he was recommended by
Third Assistant Postmaster General
Dockery for another promotion, this
time to the position which he took to-
day
Mr.. Matthews was born in Havens-
vile, Kan. October s, 1874, but for sew
eral years he has claimed <El Reno,
okla, as his legal residence. After
obtaining an education in the public
schools and a bushes college he served
for a time as school teacher. Coming
to Washington in 1895, he took up the
study of law in George Washington Uni
versity ard holds the degrees of LIB.
LIN, and DEL. from that institu-
ton.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
Bay Ice By Weight,
Not By Dimes Worth,
Is HaskelI's Adytce

Never buy 5 cents worth, or 10
cents worth Of lee. In making .
purchase buy by weight, and ask
for the weight you expect to pay
for.
This Is the advice Of Superinten.
dent Haskell, Of weights, meas.
ures, and markets. II you ask
for ) cents worth the wagon
driver Is not liable II the piece
is below the prescribed weight
II you put your request in pounds,
and do not get Is much rs called
for, this is . violation Of the law
and can be prosecuted.
Superintendent Haskell also ad.
vises that complaints be lodged
with company officials or his of.
flee, not with the driver.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
NATIONAL GUARD TO
HOLD ANNUAL CAMP
District Troops Will Spend
Period From August 4 to 13
at Harpers Ferry.

the District National Guard will go
into its annual camp at Harpers Ferry,
W. Va, on Monday, August 4, and
break camp on Wednesday. August 13
The program for the first four days
calls for the instruction of officers. to
prepare them for the problems and ma
neuvers to be executed subsequently by
the troops.
Four classes will be in the school, as
follows:
Class A. for company officers except
those in class D: instructors, Lieut.. c.
c. Herman, Lieut. G. A. Lynch, Lieu
tenant Goodwin, and Lieutenant Nor
rison. Class B. for field officers Of the
line, regimental and battalion adjutants,
Capt. william VI. Fassett, instructor.
Class c, for staff officers Of the District
citizen soldiery, instructor not yet Sc
lected. Class d, for selected Heuten-
ants. Major F. B. Wheaton. Instructor.
Athletics during the camp period VII
be under the direction of Capt. c. Eu-
gene Edwards. of the First Infantry.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
Habit
Easily Conquered

A well-known New Yorker who has
had wide experience, has written a book
telling how, the tobacco or snuff habit
may be easily banished in three days
without any return of the craving.
The health improves wonderfully after
the nicotine poison Is out Of the system.
Calmness. tranquil sleep. clear eyes.
normal appetite. good digestion, manly
vigor, strong memory, and general
gain in efficiency are among the many
benefits reported. No more of that
nervous feeling; no more need of pipe
cigar, cigarette or chewing tobacco to
pacify the morbid desire. The author
Edw J. Woods, 53i Sixth Ave. 755 X,
on application, to anyone who writes
to him.-Advt.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
Tzuo Cities Say They
Hape As Residents
Last of Momcans

Who b the last Of the Nehica1s,
the tribe imnortalised In Coop.
ers sthe Last Of Mehicansp y
New Britain, Conn, says that An.
drew Harrison, IN ectoeenar.
ian farmer Of that place is, but
friends Of Ralph Tyler, Of the
Navy Department auditors Of.
fee say that his srandnether'
Mrs. Ann McAfee, who died
thirteen years ass In Colunbas,
should have the distinction.
According to the Tyler family his.
tory, Mrs. McAfee was daughter
Of Q Mohican chieftain Of Low.
vile, n. Y.
Tyler says he has never heard Of
the New Britain claimant Of the
honor, and he Il inclined to be-
neye that the Tyler family rec
ords give the correct version.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
Girl Won't Doff Boys Attire.

TRENTON, n. J., July 13.-Cora De-
witt. pretty and sixteen years old. at
tired in boys clothing. has been sent
to the workhouse until the authorities
can investigate her strange story. She
SAYS she ran away from her home at
Smithville. y. J.. being tired of the life
there, and she refuses to don female
clothing again.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
Doctors Would Aid Gibson.

NEWBURGH. N. Y. July 13-With-
in the last fortnight Burton w Gibson
has received at Goshen jail several let
ters from prominent medical men vol
unteering to controvert the theory Of
strangulation offered by DR.. Schultz at
the last trial OF Gibson on the charge
of killing Mrs Rose Szabo on Green
wood lake. Gibson believes there will be
third trial.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Paterson, N. 1.-THE strikers Of the
Paterson silk mills received today q
single loaf of bread which will suffice to
feed several hundred of the destitute.
The loaf Is ten feet long and weighs $50
pounds.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

baltimore, Md.-AskinG that the
petition Of the United States Fidelity
and Guaranty Company for possession
Of viscera of Edward O., Painter, a
wealthy planter Of Florida, be dismissed.
his wife has filed her answer.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Oakland, Md-At . meeting Of the
Republican State Central Committee for
Garrett county II was decided to recon-
mend Andrew J. Oester for appointment
as sheriff to fill the unexpired term of
William A. Maffatt, deceased.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Triton, Gal. n. Hall, who was con.
victed Thursday Of the murder OF Den.
mis- W. Hall, May 10. has been sentenced
to be hanged August e.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Asheville, n. C-The train which
conveyed Secretary and Mrs. Bryan
and Senator Luke Lea to Asheville
killed Miss Annie E. Williams just
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Chicago-Mrs. Martha BeEgs, Of
Danville. ILL.,. was killed by an electric
automobile driven by a young woman,
who disappeared after the accident.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

two hours after the United States su-
preme Court mandate N the Minne-
sofa rate case IL received here to put
into effect the State passenger. COM
modify. and merchandise schedules.
Miehlgnn City, Ind-Dynamite was
used to check the spread of q lumber
yard flre which destroyed millions
of feet of lumber.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

NewbufEh. N. Y-Beeause cadets
at the New York Military Academy
at Cornwall won from the village
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

st. Louis.-Shcriff Dsedkmann today
refused to grant the request of striking
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

walters and the Central Trades and La
Dor Union that he appoint a posse to
protect strikers from the police.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

PhilaAelDhia-Dr. Benjamin NJ. Lee.
of this city, one Of the best known
public health physicians in the coun-
try. IL dead at Point Pleasant, n. j.
He was eighty years old.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

BOstoB.-On Boston Common and
the Charles river the tars Of the Argen-
tine training ship Sarmiento showed the
American bluejackets what they know
of field events, swimming and rowing
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Clcveland.-Thirty-nvc drivers and
as many helpers employed by the Col
onisl Ice Company are on strike for
higher pay.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

Lexington. Ky-Street car traffic
both city and interurban, was at a
3tandstill here as a result Of the genera!
strike inaugurated by the employees.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

boys the friendship and company Of
Cornwall girls, q fist battle took
place. In which the cadets were
routed.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13
News Bulletins

Chiraso.-Hans Bauder Will not
have to return to Switzerland to an
swer the charge Of operating a 500. 900
swindle on the citizens Of that country.
but is now charged with attempting to
enter this country in 1900 with a woman
not his wife.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

81. Paul-kepresentati Of Min
nesota railways today asked seventy
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

got away on tn annus' .ruise of the
Boston iacht Club none other attracted
more attention than the Sky Pilot. with
her crew of clergymen.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

San Francisco.-The steel lumber
steamer Francis NJ. Legsett. outward
bound crashed INTO the tramp schooner
J. H. LunsmaG and sank her.
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

after leaving swannanoa station. Sec
retary and Mrs. Bryan and Senator
Lea saw the accident.
Youngstown. Ohio-HaFry c. Hillis,
aged thirty years. son of r. H. E. Hills,
and a well-known young man. took his
life by shooting himself in the right
temple.
N0rristown, Pa.-Three young wsa-
ar were drowned in the Schuylkill river
within the sight Of hundreds Of per-
sons this afternoon when their boat
sprung a leak during, thunderstorm.
New YOrk-Charles Henry HuttiG.
president of the American Bankers As
ISOLATION and of the Third National
Bank of st. Louis Is dead at his sum-
mer home in the Adirondacks.
st. PauI.-Every Influence at the
command Of the State authorities Is be-
ing exerted to obtain the release of
Alois Lermer. the fifteen-year-old Ger
man boy. who is detained at Ellis
Island, ". Y.
Chicago.-Kossuth ri. Bell, former
general manager Of the Hammond
Packing Company. killed himself with a
revolver shot after spending the morn
ing in visits to banking houses, where
he methodically settled his AFFAIRS.
San Francisco-The steel lumber
The Washington times., 1913-07-13

after leaving swannanoa station. Sec
retary and Mrs. Bryan and Senator
Lea saw the accident
The San Francisco call., 1913-09-25
Mayor Asked to Set
Aside Day for Fire
Drills by Children
Garner Curran Also Wants Citizens
to Clean Up Their Premises
on Same Date

Striving to have a regular day set
aside as fire prevention day." to be
given over to fire drills by the school
children and a general cleaning up
of their premises by the citizens. Gar
ner Curran, chairman of the fire pre-
vention committee of the Editorial
Association of Southern California,
today appealed to Mayor Rolph sug-
gesting October 9 as a feasible date.
Curran has been appointed chair
man OF the committee on fire preven-
ton at the worlds insurance con-
gress, which is to convene in this city
during 1915. The appointment was
made by w. l. Hathaway. commits
sioner OF the congress. In recognition
OF Curran's endeavors to bring about
the observance of "clean up days
throughout the state.
Mayor Rose of Los Angeles already
has taken up the idea and issued a
proclamation setting aside October 8
as fire prevention day" in the south
ern city.
In his proclamation indorsing the
idea Mayor Rose said in part: THE
yearly fire waste in the United States
has mounted to the startling total of
$3.50, 900, 900, a per capita tax of about
s3 Everybody contributes to this,
either by carelessness or lack of
cleanliness in permitting the accumu-
lation of rubbish in yards or vacant
lots, in cellars. in alleys and unfre-
quented streets, and in neglecting to
keep lots and acreage free of weeds
and grass
The San Francisco call., 1913-09-25
Pacific Mail Docks
To Be Connected With
City by Car Line
United Railroads Assures Super
visors New Line Down First
Street From Brannan

streetcar connections with the new
Pacific Mail docks will be furnished
by the United Railroads by the con-
struction of a track down First
street from Brannan, according to the
assurances given the supervisors by
President Lilienthal and General
Manager Black
An arrangement long desired by
carpenters and mechanics in general
has been agreed to. Carpenters
carrying their tool kits will be al
lowed to deposit them on the front
platforms. The front gates will be
opened. and on placing their tools
they will go to the rear platform and
pay their fare.
Bids for the car advertising privi-
leges in the Geary street cars were
opened by the board of works, the
highest being $115 year for each of
the 3S cars irregular use, the bidder
being the r.. c. Scott Advertising
company OF Trenton, N. j. All were
taken under advisement
The San Francisco call., 1913-09-25
'E[0PEMENT JOKE,
SAYS JAS. MURPHY
Man Whose Disappearance
Puzzled Wife Returns and
Says Story Was Joke

LOS ANGELES. Sept 25.-James
Shields Murphy, former we'll known
San Francisco newspaper man and
now connected with the Guarantee
Building and Investment company
whose disappearance a week ago mys-
titled his wife, his relatives and asso-
ciates here, returned today from
Kingman, Ariz.
Denying he was accompanied by a
woman. Murphy said he went to King
man on mining business and regis
tered at the hotel as J. S. Murphy
of Seattle in order to keep his min
ing deal from becoming public.
A friend. says Murphy, planning a
practical joke. wrote and wife" after
Murphys name on the register.
Murphy left Los Angeles weeg
ago today. He said he sent word to
his wife that he had been called
away on business, but that the mes
sage did not reach her.
Yesterday he saw a Los Angeles
paper and learned that search was
being made for him.
The San Francisco call., 1913-09-25
SERBS RUSH
TROOPS To
BORDER
Big Army Modified to DrIys
Turks and AIbanianS Back
From Southern Frontier

BELGRADE, Sept. 25.-Prepara.
tions are being rushed for another
Balkan war. the third in less than .
year. All the Servian reserusts are
being mobilized to drive back nm
allied army or Albanians and Turks
who are advancing frorl plbra along
the entire southern from Or Of servia-
The government has comma nd ecre ea
all the railway lines running south
and only troop trairs are being
moved.
Despite any protests tia 9nrors
may make King Peter .t,-esIsns 20
annex all the northern part of tho
principality of Albania which was
formed after the first Balkan war.
GREEKS STRENGTHEN OUTPOsTS
ATHENS, Sept 25.-King Constan
tine today ordered that all the Greek
outposts in the territory won in the
two Balkan wars be strengthened.
The government fears a renewal Of
general hostilities. Turkey is held
responsible for the present lighting.
MOBILIZE ARMY DIVISION
LONDON, Sept Blowing to the
aggressions of the Albanians. says q
statement issued from the Servian
legation today. the Servian govern
ment is mobilizing an entire army
division.