The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1913-01-03
y ii! Don't breathe it to a soul, but

commandment with malicious intent,
or else he didn't know the species.
Woman can keep a secret That
she can has been practically and theo-
retically demonstrated The nay
OF any disagreeable and contrary
minded person will not be heard amid
present plaudits and affirmative &C.
claim. The libelous statement Of the
original man is obsolete.
Woman, lovely woman-Woman
with all her faults-(These are new
and very original remarks that are
absolutely necessary for the success
of the story -Woman-she of the
erstwhile weaker seX-can keep Sc
cret. The words have joyful sound
to suffrage-enlightened ears.
l know woman can keep a secret,
because I've seen one who did!
She kept it for four years and thus
disproved the old theory.
For years woman has been trying,
more or less successfully-generally
less, but don't tell anyone-to live
down the slanderous implication. For
generations it has been stumbling
block in the path of all feminine prog
ress. Now it no longer exists. The
entire sex is indicated and a pretty
little bride, matron In Newark, N. j.,
has suddenly found herself famous
She really and truly kept secret.
There were three others in the Sc
cret, but they don't count. They were
mere men-the bridegroom, the best
man and the minister With the usual
short-sightedness and scepticism of
man, every one of them fully believed
she would tell.
Forced to Answer as Duty.
But she didn't. Now she almost
wishes she had For when it finally
came out, she was kept busy "shooing"
away anxious inquirers who sought to
know how it was done. One of them
wouldn't Shoe" The question was.
ttooevitais sfhe fate aof q whole SUI
fering suffrage world might rest, in the
answer. To get it was duty owed to
humanity.
The "shooing" gradually ceased
The little bride smiled her most win
some smile. Her husband was COM
ing up the steps armed to the teeth
with most interesting brown paper
parcels, mutely suggestive of belated
wedding gifts and something good for
supper. He was hospitality persona
fed. His smile was all-embracing.
Under it's influence the woman who
had kept secret was moved to relent.
The next scene discovered the prin.
cipals seated in easy chairs in cozy
apartment where all things were new
and Iavishly tagged with best wish
es." A great silence reigned. The
woman who had kept secret was
giving practical demonstration Of how
she had done it, She was saying
nothing. But at last
Tell her, Mabel"
1t was the voice of mere man. II
was more of suggestion than com
mand, but it had a good, reassurins
sound. Evidently the speaker real
ICED that even though silence nigh
have its value in keeping secret
feminine perfection has not yet riser
above the curiosity mark. This is still
unaffected by modern improvement
and must be satisfied.
For the Good of Humanity.
So. for the good of humanity, Mrs
William Wack, teacher in the Ham
burg school of Newark, told Ten Bes
Ways of Keeping a Secret.
First, don't tell. Second, don't be
long to a bridge whist club. Third
don't have confidential friend
Fourth, don't appear superior to CON
mon mortals who haven't a secret
and don't think that everybody is JUS
dying to know it.
That's five in the negative. The otf
ers-oh, talkative woman, pause; reat
mark. learn and inwardly digest tn
words of the oracle:
When you have a great ana mt
mentous secret, don't think about l
Re natural. Cultivate calmness an
renose. Find some congenial occup'
ton and stick to 1t, Almost anythin
will do. II you can't teach schoo
teach notifies. Check off each succeed
ing day of the secret with feelings
nride that you've kept 1t so long. ant
lastly. be sure your mother is traine
In the same art.
Some mothers are not. Mrs. Wack
mother was. II she hadn't been tn
secret of the marriage of her daug
for Miss Mabel Garrabrant to WillIal
Wack, clerk in New York nation'
hank would have ceased to be secr'
three wears ago. That was when M
hal broke the news to mother. For
whole year, however, she mad new
told soul.
at was very easy" she remarke
"r inst didn't tell; that was ALL
Perfectly Simple.
How perfectly simple and praetl
ahle! Anybody can learn 1t witno
eyen taking lesson.