davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The citizen., 1913-08-22
KING OF BRITISH TESTERS
George Bernard Shaw Has Succeeded
in Ambition to Be Much-TaIk-
ed-of-Man.

i love order in all things" said
George Bernard Shaw, at public
meeting some time ago For this rea-
son | am not content with ordering
my life; | also order my personality.
l have cocoa-colored hair, so | wear
cocoa-colored clothes and drink
cocoa Shaw today has reached the
position of becoming a public institu.
uon. For more than twenty years he
has succeeded in fulfilling his boast
that every day some leading paper
would have something to say about
him. George Bernard Shaw is the jes-
ter at the court of King Demos. When
years ago he was appointed dramatic
critic to a well-known journal he re-
fused to obey the iron-clad regulation
that occupants of the stalls must
wear evening dress. The first night
he was stopped at the door of a the
ater by an attendant What do you
object to-" inquired Shaw. MY cocoa
colored Jacket" The attendant as.
sented. Very well. then" said the
critic. Il will remove it," And the
next moment he was striding up the
aisle in his shirt sleeves. That won't
do, sir" shouted the attendant. run
ming after him. Wont do?" exclaim-
ed Shaw, with a fine assumption of
Indignation. DO you think I'm going
to take off any more?" The non
plussed attendant handed him his
Jacket, and Shaw took his seat in the
stalls phantly.-London Life.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Lowe VIII Find 4 Way.

The young couple hastened into the
Union station 1t was very patent that
they were not married They were al
together too chummy for that. They
went out into the platform and stood
and talked for minute, when he took
her in his arms and kissed her fondly
and again hurried away toward a
train
What do you think of that?" in
uuired one of the attaches of the sta
ton.
That looks all right. Why"
They do that three or four times a
week. They think that everybody else
will think that he is going away on a
long journey, but he has never got on
a train yet. He simply walks around
back of the train and disappears. He
gets his kiss all right though"
The citizen., 1913-08-22
CORN SILAGE FOR
SHEEP IS PROPER
Michigan Farmer Finds It Excel
lent Ration When Allowed
to Ripen and Mature.

Silage is not always satisfactory as
ration for sheep. Sheep growers in
many localities will have nothing to
do with it as a feed for their flock.
They will admit it's undoubted value
as a cattle ration, but their expert
ence has been against it so far as
sheep are concerned.
I believe that well matured silage
can be fed to sheep with the very
best results. | have been feeding 1t
for several years, and since the first
year the results have been all that
could be asked for any ration.
The first year that l planned to
use silage as a winter feed for sheep,
| planted eight acres of corn to be
used in filling the silo. 1t was planted
rather late, and, as | was somewhat
afraid OF the frost, the crop was cut
little early. 1t was planted very
thick. sown. in fact and when cut
the leaves were green and heavy with
sap. The ears were poorly hardened,
writes a Michigan farmer in the Farm
Progress. Some of them were barely
hard enough to escape being in the
soft stage of development.
was doubtful about the quality OF
the silage, and my doubts were con-
frmed when | began feeding it 1t
was given to the sheep in small guam
titles in connection with clean tim
othy hay. Some oats were fed with
it at times.
The older sheep did not appear to
thrive on it as they should. and the
Younger ones began to appear sickly
and thriftless. 1t had tendency to
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Alike In Education.

All the world will soon be akin. as
far as education is concerned as even
the Hindu girls, from kindergarten to
college, are following the same course
of study as their American sisters.
The little children have bright papers
and beads and gifts" while their big
sisters in the college at Baroda study
the ologies, with either Hindu or Amer
ican teachers.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
LOOKING TO the Pediaree

Look at the pedigree of the stallion
you patronize. and II 1t is not issued
by one of the recognized registry as
sociations don't use that horse. Many
farmers will contend that grade
horse that is good locker is just as
good for sire as pure-bred. and
expense is much lighter.
Some of the handsomest. soundest
and most perfect horses are grades,
and while they are splendid animals
for use they are unsuitable 10 breed
to. Every grade has a yellow streak
in him. and this is just as likely TO
show as his good qualities.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Question Of Hearing.

The burly farmer strode anxiously
into the post office.
Have you got any letters for Mike
Howe?" he asked.
The new postmaster looked him up
and down.
For who?" he snapped
Mike Hover" replied the farmer.
The postmaster turned aside
You don't understand roared the
applicant. Cant you understand
plain English? l asked if you've
got any letter for Mike Howe!"
Well, haven't snorted the post
master. Neither have l letter for
anybody elses COW, Get out"
The citizen., 1913-08-22

The portly lady had accidentally
taken a rear seat in a surface car re-
served for smokers With uucon-
cealod indignation she watched the
man beside her hll his pipe
Sir finally came her frigid tones,
smoking always makes me feel sick
Does it now, ma ann" said the man
as he carefully lighted up. Then take
my advice an quit smoking"
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Poor Mans Meat" /"

In the Woman's Home Companion.
Zona Gale. writing an article entitled
Ethics and Cooks, says The family
of the legumes. the poor mans meat
the peas. beans, lentils and peanuts
are found next IN importance to
meat and eggs with peanuts one of
the best balanced foods available. and
a peanut butter sandwich is quite as
nourishing as ham sandwich"
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Let me see. said the dentist Tn
afraid we'll have 10 treat yes
one tooth, two. three teeth-ah. yes
tive teeth. eight. eleven-hah. h.-thir-
teen teeth, fifteen and two make sew
enteen'
Hey. there, Wait n minute, In
terrupted the shaking patient; what
do you think you're treating a comb
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Knows Just How the sook Ended

Knows Just How the Beck Ended.
Mabel and Johnny are nice chill
dren, but they love to argue. The
other day they got into a heated dis.
:ussion as to which one had read
he more books. Finally Johnny said:
We'll, I've read Robinson Crusoe'
and you haven't"
"Oh, yes, ! have" returned Mabel,
not to be outdone by mere boy.
Now. what does it say at the very
last?" he asked.
The little girl studied for mo-
ment, then her face frightened.
why. it says The End was the
unexpected answer
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Clean Nests Essential.

Clean nests are very essential in
producing clean fowls. Change the
nest material occasionally, and as a
precaution against insects burn the
discarded material that is taken from
the nests. Too much care cannot be
given to cleanliness in the poultry
yard.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Value Of Clover.

Where clover can be induced to
grow it rapidly loosens the soil by
its deep-running roots, and absorbs
from the atmosphere many elements
which, when in prime of the plant
are turned under, will add greatly TO
the wealth of the soil.
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Waiter" called the customer in a
restaurant where an orchestra was
playing
Yes. sir.
Kindly tell the leader Of the or
chestra to play something sad and low
while / dine. | want TO see if II will
have softening influence on tlEs
steak"
The citizen., 1913-08-22
ELIXIR BABEK A GOOD TONIC

And Drives Malaria out of the System.
Your 'Babek' acts like magic; | have
given il to numerous people in my par
tsh who were suffering with chills. ma
laria and fever. l recommend ii to those
who are sufferers and in need of a good
tonic."-Rev. S. SZymanowski St
Stephens Church. Perth Amboy. n. J.
Elixir Babek so cents, all druggists or
by Parcels Post prepaid from Kloczew-
ski & Co, Washington, d. C.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Air In Cow Stable.

Keep the air as pure as possible In
the COW stable. Look well to the ven
tilation. DO not disturb the manure
in the cutters or stalls until after
milking is over and the milk is re-
moved from the stable.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
lts Roaders Are Lealon.

Has Judkins' paper much OF a cir
eula;lon?"
Has it2 don't suppose there is
straphanRor IN this entire town
that isn't a subscriber TO It"
The citizen., 1913-08-22
For SIMMER HEADACHES

Hicks CAPUDINE is the best remedy
no matter what causes thcm-w whether
from the heat. sitting in draughts. fever
ish condition. etc. l0c.. 25c and so per
bottle at medicine stores. Adv.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
The Tender Skin Of Children

is very sensitive TO heat Use Tyree's
Antiseptic Powder for all summer skin
affections. 1t quickly affords the little
sufferer relief. Csc at druggists or
sample sent free by J. S. Tyree,
Chemist. WASHINGTON, D. C.-Adv.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Awful Thought.

Small Eve-Mamma, | don't like this
milk.
Mamma-What's wrong with it?
Small Eve-lt tastes as if an onion
had taken a bath in it.
The citizen., 1913-08-22

You say your FIRST speech made
several convertsg'
Yes" answered the orator regret.
fully. from my side 10 that OF the
opposition"
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Appreciated No Less.

Elsie--I didn't know he could afford
to give you such an expensive engage
ment ring.
Egeria-He couldn't-but wasn't it
dear of him?-Life.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
crnn In Poultry Yard.

Plant the poultry yards to some
crop if possible. If this is not prac-
ticable keep the yard sweet and clean
by plowing and disinfecting.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
How He Knew.

81 have got to quit smoking"
Doctor order you to-"
"Oh, no.
Then how do you know you have
to quit?"
My wife told me So"
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Dear mel" exclaimed the fond IA
ther. anxiously, whatever can be the
matter with the baby?-it isn't cry
ing!"-Puck.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Paper and Slate

My profits are largely on paper"
remarked the broker.
Mine are on the slate chimed in
the foxy coal dealer with wink.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Retcrt Courteous.

Nell-My face is my fortune.
Belle-Then you need never be
afraid of fortune hunters.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
anarns for Chickens.

bran or middlings and beef scrap
should be kept in receptacles to which
.be fowls have access at all times.
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Properly Named.

"Why does this piano manufacturer
call his business an infant Industry"
Because he manufactures mostly
baby grands.'
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Sometimes a mans friends think OF
him as his enemies speak of him
The citizen., 1913-08-22
Accurate Reply.

DO | take thisssteamer to Boston,
We'll, I'd let the captain do that,
II | were you"
The citizen., 1913-08-22

When a girl is hard to please she is
seldom worth the trouble.
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Some people manage 10 make q lit
tie truth go a long way by stretch
ing H.
The citizen., 1913-08-22

One good rundown may eliminate
the necessity for another.
The citizen., 1913-08-22

Thirteen states have boiler inspee-
ton laws.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
GETS A DIVORCE FROM
HER DEAD HUSBAND

DENVER Fob THAT Mrs May
Rinrey. when she secured a divorce
from her husband. Charles Rippey, a
forgcr and supposed fugitive from
iusticc. was granted a decree Of sep
orator from man already dead. Is
disclosed by q letter 10 her attorney
from William ". Siunson. Of New
York The communication says
The man yen arc looking for T.
Gcad am certcin OF that. Rlrpey
u sale 20 have boarded the Titanic
whcn she set sail Oh her maiden voy
age for America Tie registered nm.
Ter the name OF Charles TAFT and I
am sure that he was one OF the pas-
seneers who went down when the big
steamer colliGed With tho monster
iceberg"
Simpson. who had bee. asked TO
locatc Rippcy. employed detectives.
who traced his movements to the
sinking OF The Titanic.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
SHORT HATPINS FOR
THE HELLO" GIRLS
Milwaukee Alderman Gets Pow.
erful Allies in His Fight
Against Long Ones

MILWAUKEE,. Wis, Feb. 5.-The
advocates of hatpln regulation are
collecting newspaper clippings of ac-
cidents TO support their contention
that limit should be placed on the
dagger-like lid" fasteners, at least
as to length, If not as TO rapier-like
points.
Alderman John j. Hughes is re-
sponsible for the ordinance now pend
ing in the city council 10 make it a
criminal offense for woman to wear
a hat-pin longer than necessary.
Women's clubs of the city say he Is
going too far He would have the
ordinance enforced by woman po-
liceman
He has received from a woman a
homemade ornamental cork guard
for pat-pins. The cork is covered
with silk thread and is fastened TO
the hat with a string.
Fifteen hundred telephone girls
have allied themselves with Alderman
Hughes. Under guidance of Miss
Elizabeth Rosche they have declared
themselves against the long hat-pit.
They have pledged themselves not to
wear long hat-pins, and also TO try
To influence all womankind TO join
in the anti-hat-pin movement. 1t is
agreed that a bat-pin that does not
protrude more than half an inch is
allowable.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
SEES HUSBAND,
THOUCHTDEAD,W
MOVING PICTURE
Wife Believed Harry B-0vneIl to
Have Perished in North
ern Woods
IDENTIFICATION POSITIVE
AS FILM IS REPEATED
Thousands of Dollars Spent In
Search for Man Who Disap-
peared on Deer Hunt

SAGINAW. Mich. Feb. 7.-tspe-
ciaD-Mrs. Idah Brownell. OF st.
Charles, Saginaw county, believes
that her husband. Harry, who disap-
peared three years ago. while hunting
deer in Northern peninsula. Is alive
Although thousands OF dollars were
spent in searching for Browneiis
nothing was ever heard from him IN
Ill this week a moving picture MIN In
st. Charles movie house, showed.a
political parade during the RepuDh-
can convention in Chicago last sum
mer Twenty st. Charles people
thought they recognized Harry BROW
nell. Mrs. Brownell was taking tickets
and the film was run over again Tor
her and she recognized her husband.
The Aim has been sent away for en-
fragment.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
WANT DETECTIVES TO
TESTIFY IN NEW YORK

Detective Chief Robert Palmer has
received telegram from New York
asking that Detectives Reid and Lar
kins be sent there TO testify in the
case of Robert Mowat, who. the tele-
gram states. is under Indictment
there IN a swindllng charge.
Mowat is the promoter OF a sani-
tary plumbing concern who was ar
rested here some time ago, on re-
quest Of the Burns detective agency,
which stated that he was wanted in
New York for a $500 check kiting
deal. He was released, by the local
Police, when they learned that there
was TO be no prosecution. Now comes
the telegram, asking for the local de-
tectives Capt, Palmer says he will
consider the matter before granting
the request
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07

proach I'm the Spanish-American war.
II was Theodore Roosevelt who
changed that name. and called those
men 'ProgressiNes. | am sorry that
Senator l.aFollette did not show him
self as big a man as he was thought
TO be, and could not come with us;
but when the Progressive party was
created In Chicago. Aug. g, "A place
was made for all Americans who be-
lieved In progressive principles. and
who, up TO that time, had been with
out party.
If man really believes in these
principles. he cannot be progressive
Republican; he must be Progress
sive. The Progressive party is bound
TO be the party of progress In the
nation; the Democratic party, with
the lid south To keep II in existence.
is bound TO be the conservative party.
can see no place for the Republican
party In the future. The crisis which
created II before the Civil war has
Vanished The young men, the men
who are TO make the future of Amer
lea, are with the Progressive party.
"Mr. Munsey's talk of union be-
tween the Progressives and Repub-
llcans is absurd lie still harks back
TO the Republican party's past record.
He seems TO think that "A compromise
can be arranged. He forgets that no
BODY O fmen can effect an arrange
ment by which several millions OF
thinking citizens will surrender the
progressive opinions which they have
adopted in order 10 save party
name. The Progressive party is here
TO stay, and TO remain the dominant
party in Michigan"
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
FALL DOWN STAIRWAY
MAY CAUSE DEATH

Richard Houghton. GO years old, OF
No. SO Elm-st., fell headong down the
basement stairway in Frank KamiE S
saloon. No. 800 Forrest west, while be
was repairing frozen gas pipe in the
place. Friday morning. His skull was
fractured and he is thought to be
dying In ST Mary's hospital
Detectives Golden and Steinhebel
were sent TO investigate the case
when rumors that man had been in.
Jured in the place reached police head
quarters. They found that Houghton
and a helper, both employed by the
Detroit City Gas Co. were going down
cellar when Houghton tripped and fell
headlong. Houghton had been en-
ployed by the gas company for about
40 years, they say
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
FIFTEEN POLICEMEN
OUT OF COMMISSION
Hard Luck" Column i'm Secre-
tary Walters Books Shows
Many Accidents

Here's the hard luck column OF Po-
lice Secretary George Walters set OF
books just as George, who is a dyed.
in-the-wool optimist, makes il out:
List OF disabled officers, Feb. 9:
Chas. Crossman. Central division
Struck BY car getting out OF way OF
auto: badly shaken up; cut on head
Geo. Allison, Third precinct: Slip
ped and fell on sidewalk while pa
trolling; sprained wrist.
Fred Drum. Fourth precinct: Slip
ped and fell while patrolling
sprained ankle.
Louis Walla. Fourth precinct.
Struck Pole on head and fractured
his own hand.
Robert Is. Mckenzie, Fifth precinct:
Struck by auto while on traffic duty
AT Jefferson-ave. car barns. right side
and arm hurt,
Geo. Goniea. Sixth precinct;
Scratched hand on wire fence coming
In from duty; blood poisoning.
Charles Richardson, Sixth Precinct (:
Broke bone in hand while making ar.
rest.
Aug. Schoenrath, Sixth precinct:
Scratched hand on nail while making
an arrest; blood poisoning
Chas. Frurip, Seventh precinct: Cut
by an italian while making an arrest
Ralph Russell Mounted division
Horse fell with him; left leg badly
broken.
Florence Mccarthy, Eighth Pre-.
cinct: Didn't know ii was loaded;
top OF little finger shot of.
William j. Chestnut, Eighth pre-
cinct Fire in his home; hand
burned.
Henry Kane, Eighth precinct: AS
sisting team OF horses which had fal-
len down; horse stepped on his foot.
Robert Savory, Eighth precinct:
Hurt right leg while trying TO assist
In moving abandoned automobile.
Philip Beaudoin, Ninth precinct:
Struck by an automobile while doing
traffic duty; fractured rib.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
NECKLACE MISSING
AFTER GUESTS LEAVE
Mrs. A. l.. Stein Reports Disap-
pearance OF 81, 900 Gem
Police Are Investigating

Detective Emory Brooks, OF the
central bur,tI aud Detectives Shep-
herd and Di.,1le, OF Bethune station,
are working on a real regular dia-
mond mystery such as figures in the
best of recent novels.
Mrs. A. l.. stein, widow, who is
the propri1Ltss OF a business enter
rise In Battle Creek. and lives az
No. l0S Medbury-ave.. this city, had
a 81 900 diamond necklace stolen,
Thursday afternoon. She was enter
tanning two women OF fashion and
refinement whom she has know for
years.
Mrs. Stems young son came into
the house, crying while his mother
was entertaining her guests. and said
that boy had slapped him The
guests told Mrs. stein that they would
never stand for such a thing, and ad-
visod her 10 go out and settle the
matter
She did She returned. prepared
tea. served it. and after her guests
LETT, went 10 her boudoir. al 6 o'clock.
and found that a rubber band had
been taken from her bank book, and
the 81 900 necklace, consisting OF II
diamonds, strung with platinum, was
She notified the police.
Detective Brooks called at tae
home of Mrs STEMS guests. Frisay
morning. Neither of the women was
az home. II was stated that they
were out shopping. and might return
at p. m. and maybe not until eve
ning.
Detective Brooks is going TO see
them when they return lie refuses
10 make any comments.
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07


OF saloons and throwing out all the
undesirable ones. but ! do not think
the intent OF the law is TO drive 400
or 500 respectable saloonkeepers out
of business. | am opposed TO grant
ing the full number OF licenses II the
ordinance is killed The corporation
counsel has given an opinion that we
must do SO IL we do not pass the or
dinance, but am in favor or proceed
ing along the line we originally in
tended to--drive out the undesirable
saloons and refuse new licenses in
their places"
The Rev. Edward III. Pence. OF the
Forrest Presbyterian church, also
smoke on the liquor question He
used the words of Gen. Y. 3 Grant:
THE best way to get rid OF a bad
law is TO enforce it, to explain his
point OF view.
IF the Warner.Cramton law Is
Tad one, then let us enforce IL and
test II out said Pastor Pence. THE
council must abide by the law
The council committee Oh liquor
regulation meets. Monday afternoon,
al 4 o'clock At that time the Lodge
ordinance will be taken up. Chair
man Dingeman is in a quandary as
10 how best TO dispose of the ordi-
nance. First OF all he will Ask Cor
poration Counsel Lawson for writ
ten opinion az TO the necessity OF
passing such an ordinance 10 reduce
the number OF saloons under the
characterization law
Then the chairman will suggest to
the other members of the committee
that the ordinance be reported out
10 The common council To be acted
upon next Tuesday evening Here is
where the pinch comes II the com
mittee supports the ordinance its
mombers will have to support the
measure on the floor OF the council.
TO be consistent. ON the other hand.
IL the committee reports il out unfav-
orably, ii will place itself in the EN-
barrassing position OF turning down
the law as il is interpreted by the
city's legal adviser. 3
'As ! stated In the meeting. Thurs
day night, ! am in favor OF proceed
ing without the Lodge ordinance, -
said Aid. Dingeman, Friday morning.
Il recognize that the situation is "A
delicate one--one that will bring
down all sort of criticism on my
head, no matter how | act.
Il believe that the saloonkeeper as
we'll as the public ought 10 lie given
a square deal. II the ordinance Is
killed, Tuesday night, as expect it
will be, | intend 10 20 ahead and cut
down the number OF liquor licenses by
eliminating the undesirable ones The
saloonkeepers who are thrown out
can then go into court. and the mat
ter viii be thrcshed out on its m SrJs
we can get a supreme court rul-
ing as to the councils power to re-
duce the saloons under the Warner
Cramton law Ii the court upholds
the action OF the committee, all Will
and good If the court decides against
us. then we can balk the undesirable
saloCnkeepers by putting new men In
| their places The power OF the com
mon council 10 choose from the list
OF applicants has been clearly defined
in several recent decisions
Charles A. Nichols. who is super
vising the work OF investigation for
( the liquor committee, will make his
+ first official report next Monday az
! ternoon
The Detroit times., 1913-02-07
PARCEL POST USED FOR
TON AND HALF OF COMBS

LEOMINSTER, Mass, Feb. Six
hundred packages OF hair combs and
pins were sent out today by parcel
post by the local comb manufacture
ers. 1t was the largest number Of
packages delivered at the 'postoffice
here since the installation Of the par
eel post system.
The consignment weighed moro
than ton and half. Special wagons
had TO be engaged to carry the pack
ages from the postofice to the train.
The shipment was made by the par
Gel post as an experiment. III the
manufacturers find IL works salts
factorily they will use IL exclusively.
Many other manufacturers are
watching the experiment with close
attention with view TO using the
parcel post for shipments that will
amount to many thousands OF dollars
In value each week.