The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-11-04
JUS rs TORIES
Gossip Of the Peculiarities Of
Men Of Washington.


The Latter Was . Book Agent
Once. in Texas.
Dan Garrett Of Texas, ~Happy
Dan" Sings All the Time.
Washington. Nov. 4.-Secretary Will
liam Jennings Bryan and Representa-
tive J. w Bryan Of Washington arc
not related, but they are much alike in
that both are great public speakers.
The secretary OF state got his early
training in school ''boyoratoring' out
in Nebraska. while the congressman
to talk while selling books down
in Texas.
Bryan was sole agent for northern
OF DR.. Dewitt Talmage. He had a 1e
pound GRAFTON and IL pound book that
he just fairly threw at the natives for
several summers. while working his
way through college. They do say
down there that once he got the front
the threshold the honest housekeeper
had as well dig up $1.75 for set of
half morocco. Talmage works and save
time. He nearly always made sale.
During the first summer out Bryan
had several peculiar experiences. He
traded books for lodging, board and
most everything else. Finally he be-
came SO affluent that he bought HIM
self a horse and buggy and went sour
rying around the countryside on wheels
"a thing no book agent in those parts
ever had done before.
But no book agent is so clever that
he does not fall down on a sale once in
a while. Bryan missed the bull's-eye
badly on one shot. He landed in a town
one day with a full set Of Talmage's
works and Bibles, and that very night
the holy writ was stolen from the
burg's only church. Bryan did not dare
attempt sale for fear suspicion would
fall on him. SO he sat idly by and saw
another make the deal.
Referring to domestic scraps. Repre-
Samuel NJ. Taylor Of Arkan-
sas told OF the meanest neighbors that
ever lived. or at least that was the
opinion of Mrs. Smith. who lived next
door.
Smith was going down town one
morning when he ran across q friend.
and the conversation eventually drift
ed to house adjoining the former.
I'm sorry they are there said
Smith, referring to the new neighbors.
They are simply driving my poor wife
crazy"
'That's. hard luck" commented the
friend. alphabetically. What do
they do-have a domestic scrap every
night?' @ias
eyes" replied Smith. but that isn't
exactly what's driving mother bug
eign lauEbazS and khE cau't nlAarstand
a word they SAY" !sSssFsssfs
Not that Representative Robert f.
Broussard of Louisiana is finicky
about his food: far be it from any
all food. some more than others. but
all Of it to him is, good. and the sub
ject to him is very interesting.
Good natured always, 1t is not for
him to complain. No man in public
life has more reason to be contented
eighth term in the house Of repre-
sentatives and has nicely buttoned up
q eix-year term In the senate following
that: Contented? What. that's his
struck a steak in the house restaurant
that did not appeal to him. Sadly he
pushed 1t away from him.
whats the matter with 1t. Bot? %
asked a fellow member who was
1unching with him.
II don't know" said Broussard, "but
it tastes like washed money"
Possibly he may have been served a
liver-pad.
There il q good story going around
the capitol about Representative
In prehistoric days. when Small was
young in law, he was prosecuting q
town bully who bore q desperate char
acter. This desperate was supposed
to have added greatly to the popu1a-
ton OF the village cemetery and to be
ready tn Kill hfa a fhA NJ
an acorn.
So when Small stood him up at the
bar before country Justice Of the
peace the embryo congressman paint
ed the prisoner In such dark colors
that his own mother would never have
recognized him at five PAGES. In the
height Of his eloQuence Small pointed
q long finger at the trembling man
and shouted:
why, that man at the bar would
Just as soon kill me as not right here
before your face, judged"
The Judge leaned thoughtfully over,
took off his specs and glowered at the
offending criminal
John Smith," he thundcred. III
you dare kill Small here before me 1
will fine you q dollar and fifty cents
Tor contempt of cote: durn my soul.
II I DON'T"
A certain western CONGRESSMAN.
whose name cannot be dragged into
publicity by a thousand yoke Of oxen,
some time ago met q newspaper cor
respondent and offered to give him
the new personnel Of the board select
ed to assist the interstate Commences
commission in the work Of physical
valuation OF railroads. He gave the
names. ending with land q Mr.. VIII
HamS Of Virginia
And a Mr.. williams of viretnia,.. re-
peated the correspondent, with 4 large
question mark ut the end Of his sentencs
What MI. Williams?''
gresham, but think he is Z ratlroad
engineer: or something ike that
:, Well. the next day. John Shelton VIII
assistant secretary of the treasury, was
made chairman Of the board "A Mr..