The Irish standard., 1913-05-10
SLOW WITH WIDOWS
But Mrs. Crabtree's Lemon Pies
Were Good and She
Was Coy.
BY CARL JENKINS.

tree.
He knew that she was widow.
He knew that she attended his
church.
In fact he passed her house at least
ten times week.
The Deacon knew things and would
not have denied them, but he was
going slow on widows. During the
eight years he had been a widower
four different attempts had been made
to lasso him for another trip In the
saddle Of matrimony-two by widows
and two by old maids.
The Deacon was sly old bird of
sixty. He was comfortably we'll off.
the days passed peacefully, and he
wasn't taking any risks. And the four
attacks on him by the four women had
made him 80 suspicious Of the sex that
II woman stopped him on the side
walk and asked the time of day there
seemed to be hidden motive some
where.
The widow Crabtree had never
sought to advance herself in the at
tentioE' Of the Deacon. If he bowed as
they encountered each other at the
church door she bowed. If he remarked
that 1t was fine morning she agreed.
On one occasion he asked whether old
Mrs. Thompson was dead or not, and
she had replied that she guessed not,
rs she had seen her out mending the
stable door the afternoon before.
It cannot be said that Mrs. Crab
tree was either sixty years old or a
sly bird, but she may have had
thoughts and plans. It's just possible
that she may have picked up a hint
from a remark dropped by neighbor
one day. The Deacon's name hap
pened to come into the conversation,
and the neighbor said:
isn't 1t queer about the Deacon's
appetite7"
. How do you mean?'
"Why, he's q regular fend for lemon
pie. He wants one at every meal"
: you don't say"
And that's about all he does want.
Hes had about three housekeepers a
year since his wife died, and has let
them all 60 because they couldn't
make good lemon pies. Aunt Sally
Smith is there now. but she was tell
ing me the other day that she don't
expect to stay long. He says her
lemon pies would kill dog"
Nothing further was said, but there
was germ of big idea. The Deacon
always went to the postofice after sup.
per. Sometimes he passed the widows
and sometimes he went the other, way.
She took her chances the afternoon of
the conversation and baked lemon
pie Mrs. Crabtree had never boosted
Of her skill as pie-maker, but when
It came to a lemon pie she had
twist of the wrist that turned them
out for a king.
At six o'clock on that summer eve
ming the Deacon came walking down
Spruce street. He had just got up
from the table, and on that table had
been lemon pie. Aunt Sally Smith had
done her level best. The Deacon had
cut the pie in halves and lifted half up
In his hand and taken a bite of 1t and
exclaimed:
Take the darn thing off!"
'But it's a fine pie, Deacon"
1T tastes like a raw CARROT"
mercy on mel" ...
Feed 1t to the pig!"
Deacon, you must surely have
eaten green cherries and got bad
taste in the mouth. never took such
pains with lemon pie"
"You never knew how to make one,
and you are too old now to learn. By
dinks wish I knew of woman with
In a hundred miles Of here that knew
how to make lemon pie-a real lem.
on pie!"
: Aunt Sally started to the kitchen
with quivering chin, and Deacon Hart.
ley showed back from the table and
got his hat and cane and started for
the postof1ce. The widow Crabtree
was watching for him. He came down
Spruce street with a scowl on his face.
and as he reached point opposite
her gate she opened the door and
called:
"Just a minute, please, Deacon"
well, what is it?"
. II am going to ask you rather
funny question. Do you like pies?"
II don't care for mince or apple"
but lemon?"
II can eat three a day IL they are
made right" said the Deacon as his
mouth began to water.
II made one this Afternoon, and ]
should like your opinion Of it. VIII
you come in and sample it?''
"Bless me, yes"
That pie was on the table waiting
for him. His eyes began to dance at
the first look. It was noble looking.
pie II seemed to smile in his face.
There was Juice there. There was a
crust there as faky az the bark on q
spring willow. At last he had found
the hope of his heart.
The widow cut the pie in quarters
and passed him one of them. He ate
this standing up, and with great gusto.
Then he ate the next section sitting
down and he smacked his lips just