The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1913-08-16
Cock Of the Walk

ough expected business acquaint.
ance to lunch with him ut his stately
mansion. When the guests hour fol
arrival drew near the host summon.
ed his butler,
Malachi" said he. when his uni.
formed servant stood respectful be.
fore him. Fl came near forgetting
about the wine. There's Just one
bottle OF champagne downstairs.
Bring 1t up for lunch"
That bottles gone. Master"
stammered the butler, THE cook Is
responsible for It. Sir"
Bottle gone, aud cook respons.
isle! Send the cook here!"
Shortly this domestic, her eyes
flashing defiance. entered.
bridget. bottle OF wine"
BE careful. Sir" broke In
that Indispensable servant standing
threateningly in the middle Of the
floor. BE very careful or oi'll
leave!"
Hear me through. Bridget. A
bottle OF wine Is missing from the
cellar. Do you know what became Of
that bottle?"
did OF steal It. do you mean? II
ye insinuate as much. mark We. Sir.
ORR leave!"
Il haven't accused you OF any
thing OF the sort. All / want to
know Is what became Of that bottle
Bridget"
Then Oi'll tell ye about that bot
tie. and then mind we, Oi'll leave.
Last night OF had company in the
kitchen. Twas the cook and another
" the servants from the Van Bullion
house across the street. OF had been
telling them how much leeway OF
had In this house. even to being con-
sidered as one above the pale " SER
wants in any mansion. not excfudtn'
the White House. .-
There was sneer on the face "
the Van Bullion cook, Sir, that OF
was tempted to efface wild smash
" me fist: but. as is becoming a
cook " yours, Sir, OF held my dig
nifty and resolved to rub It in. Ex-
cuse my French. Sir"
Go ahead. Bridget"
so Of then and there evolved a
bold scheme. in which you and Ma
lachi and that bottle were the impor-
tant figures. Excusing myself, OF
hurried to Malachi and disclosed my
intention. Malachi was afraid. but
OF put him easy by shouldering tho
entire responsibility. Remember,
Sir. when DIVE finished Oin leave!"
&c, "Pshaw! we're not on thu sub
tect Of leaving. Bridget. Go on:
what was your scheme?"
ITO impress the truth " my boast.
Ing words on my visitors OF had
Malachi go and rig himself up In
your clothes. put on one Nv your
wigs. until he looked the dead spit "
ye. Sir. Then. at the ring " bell.
which I had taken into the kitchen,
Malachi in your make, up came in
wild smile on his face to see what
OF wanted. Oi'll leave when me tale
is told. Sir"
Nonsense. Where did tho bottle
Of wine play part. Biidget?"
"Oi'm forninst that part " me
story. Sir. AS your bogus self In
auired what was my pleasure. o.
says, Mr.. Goldsborough. first let me
introduce me two friends naming
them. Malachi smiled again and
seemed pleased to meet me friends.
Then says Oh MIR. Goldsborough. ye
have in the cellar Just one remaining
bottle " champagany wine. Bring
It up and let me friends drink to
your health and mine And the
next minute In walked your bogus
self wild the missing bottle and the
glasses. Then while OF gave the
toasts me and me friends clinked
the filled glasses until the bottle was
empty. Now ORR leave. Sir"
Wait! tell me why you went to
so much trouble and risk in this pro-
cedure. Bridget
ITO prove to me friends, that in
this house Orm the cock Nv the walk.
Sir. Now Oi'fi-"
You'll stay. Bridget. on an In
creased salary. For Of all the cooks
we ever had you are indeed the cock
OF the walk"
Tried to Make Good.