The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-06-30
says UNCLE CIV

There was a time in Puckyhuddle
when we remembered the Sabbath day
to keep it holy, and let it go at that.
In those days our smiling village was
for six days in the week a mean, hard
listed, grasping. sneering, backbiting
little community that would have
driven an angel to tears and made the
devil himself turn white from envy.
On the seventh day we refrained from
all labor and were duly pious. We
loved our neighbors as much as we
could after hating them all the week,
and gave penuriously to the preacher,
whom, I now believe, we overpaid.
Happily, in the course of time, this
his still more pinched philosophy of
life, pinched out and we laid him
away with proper solemnity. Then
there came to town a young mer-
chant, who said he could preach a
bit. Inasmuch as the bell wether
deacon wanted a job for his son in
the new merchants store and the new
merchant didn't want any salary for
preaching, it was allowed that maybe
it would be a good thing to give him
a chance.
This general store-keeper was a
young fellow with square jaw, a blue
eye and a smile that meant anything
from "Glad to see your to Hands
off," according to what was in your
own heart. He came to church in a
business suit, chucked his brown
derby into the nearest pew, waited
until the choir and the congregation
had relieved their pent-up feelings in
a lugubrious hymn and then sailed in.
AS T remember it, he said some
thing like this
Lets understand each other in the
beginning. This village has a repu-
tation in this corner of the state as
being the stingiest, back-bitingest
place on earth. Most regulations are
more or less deserved, and I reckon
we didn't come to ours without earn
ing it."
There was some confusion in the
room by this time, and the bell wether
deacon, who never loaned money at
less than IL per cent and a bonus,
began to exhibit symptoms Of
apoplexy.
'I take it that what ai1s us is that
we've got too much theology and not
enough religion. I think we're paying
too much attention to what the Bible
says and not enough to what the good
men of the Bible did.
We've been long on Sabbath OBJ
servance and the rest of our church
regulations and short on good works,
which is the meat of the whole propo-
sition. We've had enough faith and
we haven't done anything to prove
the worth Of either.
"'A1I useful labor is holy. It's holy
because it contributes to human hap
piness and that is the most holy thing
in the world. No man ever went to
hell because he smiled. A good
many men keep out OF hell because
they do. Puckyhuddle is about all
the hell any man need to want. It's
hell because there are more sneers
than helpful words, more doubt of
your reighbor than faith in his good
more cheating in horse
trades than solicitude for your
brother.
Il don't care if you shut up this
church tomorrow and never open it. |
I don't care if you play baseball on |
Sunday and put on prize fight or |
two IN the school house. I don't care |
much what you do, you can't make |
conditions any worse and you may |
help some; but as for me and my |
house, were going to put a little |
everyday faith in humanity, hope |
and good cheer in every pound of |
sugar or side of bacon that you buy |
down at the general store. I'm going |
to call you all friends and nobody |
in my hearing is going to lambast |
his neighbor. We're going to make
this village a good little town to live
in because we're going to quit talk
ing about each other, help where we
can and mind our own business If
you like this kind of gospel I'll keep
on preaching. If you don't you'll
nave to come down to the general
store where we keep every day holy,
ope just as holy as the rest. I think
It's time for Deacon BeHwether to
cad in prayer"
Of course, that Jared the village; but 1t
llso regenerated it. Life was worth Iiv-
ng pretty shortly after that, everybody's
money at living rates of interest.-(Copy-
light. 1913, by the Mcclure Newspaper
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