The Washington times., 1913-03-22
The
S0ng-PIusger

|I~ AY, do yuh think got a movin
picture face?" aueried Connie
- "wha-at?"
DO yuh think much Wv m!
features as a trademark" she simpli
fled. I'm gettin' sick Wv bein' clampet
to chair In a lobby where II yuh ain
bein' chloroformed by the million dollal
colognes Nv the swell danes yer appe
tite is bein' unnecessarily agitated by
the fumes Nv food yuh amt never goin
to be asked to digest! I'm thinkin' u,
joinin' the movie squad"
Have you had an offer?"
mo. That's what I'm asking yuh
Do yuh think thy'd trample each other
down to get me? When I got my hair
unwaved an hangin' l could pass easy
fer a precocious member wv the infant
class An 1 got smile that'd break
the ice In ANY layer Nv society-to say
nothin' Nv the Oriental languor Nv my
lamps,''
Now, what in the world" began.
"Oh, / know what yer goin' to say.
What in the world do yuh want to give
I'D a sure thing fer fer somethin' yuh
DON'T know nuthin' about?' Well, tell
yuh-Tm progressive. I am. don't
want to be wished on a eight-dollar joo
all my life. Some day. fore I die, I'm
goin' to have a French maid an hand
embroidered nighties- Anyway. 1 had
the movie bug once before, when l wu1
goin' with the song plugSer."
The song plugSer?' echoed.
'.Yeh. He wuz the next calamity.
Gee, / had ambitions an ideels before
Il finished II
didn't have no thought more spirituaIn
a ham sandwich, Did yuh ever know a
song plugger? Well, they're In a cage
all by themselves. He wuz workfn' fer
a music house on Broadway an on the
surface he had a cinch job-nothin' to
do but go round to vaudeveel shows
an cabarets an movies.
THAT wuz on the surface, but :aely
II WIZ n case NV offerin' his hearts
blood. II necessary, to any guy who d
sing. play or whistle one Nv their songs.
The house he worked fer wuz one NV
them pure concerns what gets the poor
boob to pay fifty life savers for pub
Iishin' his vocal spasm an then gives
him ten complimentary copies NV 1t an
kicks him out!
Gee, It's great the way they do H.
First the gink comes into the place
with the notes. the way he has em
writ. an asks to see the manager. One
nv the office boys seZ the managers
very busy now with Pierpont Morgan,
who's beggin him TO publish one NV his
songs. viii he wait?
After a half hour NV waitln, durin
which time he wishes he knew where
the fire-escape lay. he is called into the
managers office, which same looks like
a boudoir NV a Fifth avenue mansion.
The manager Slances over the manu-
script. throws fit, calls his best piano
heater Zone Nv them that puts whipped
cream on every selection) an they go
to II,
"Well. NV course the poor simp what
wrote II don't recognize It at all. 1t
sounds to him like he's got wagner
playin' bull fiddle in the orchestra! So.
when the manager springs that little
fifty gag. he falls without any pushin'.
$50, as I wuz goin' to ree-mark. 1
went with this particular plugger. He
WIZ flshy logger. IL his clothes'd had
The gift NV melody he could "a plugged
'thout openin' his face. | didn't mind
him warblin' in public so much. cause
usually il wuz dark. But one night We
wuz at a cabaret, in a fiossy joint. an
right at the next table wuz guy what
had sort Nv threw me down fer bru-
nette vampire. Wv course ! wanted to