The Washington herald., 1913-11-09


that he couldn't make any that would
be believed, and he had q pistol at his
head when a friend came in and hand
ed him one of my troches. An hour
later he had made the Mayor and
others believe that an aunt had left
him a legacy. He even gave the name
of the aunt and the size shoes she wore.
Mr.. Fitch, of Wisconsin, who is famous
as a Biblical student, writes US that
there is no sort OF doubt in his mind
that If Abe! had had one OF the troches
to take when he saw Cain coming for him
II would have been the other brother that
would have had his cocoanut smashed
Mrs. Schemerhorn writes us from a
town in Ohio that for twenty years she
suffered with a weak heart, and there
fore had to knuckle down to her HUSBAND
IN everything. She took three troches
and effected a complete cure. and thess
assumed the reins of government and
now has her husband under such control
that he dasn't say boo.
Mr.. McAdoo, of Delaware, was told by
three different doctors that he had
Bright's disease and could only live five
days, four hours and twenty-seven min
utes. He was making his will, when a
boy fetched him a packet of Knock EN-
Outs from a cooper shop. After taking
one he tore up the will, which had left
everything to his mother-in-law. After
taking the second he called the doctors
Ihorse-thieves and New York State SEN
ators. With the third troche all signs
of his ailment vanished, and he now sees
no reason why he shouldn't live to be a
hundred years old
Remember that these troches are pre-
pared under the pure food and drug act,
which virtually says that as long as rail-
road spikes are not one of the ingredi-
ents of a remedy it is all right.
Judge Callahan. of Missouri, was about
to sentence a prisoner to death for hold
ing a straight flush in a poker game,
when his honor fell from the bench to
the floor and gave one or two kicks
and was supposed to be dead. There
was great confusion, and it was only the
prisoner that kept his head He stopped
over the body, pried the locked teeth
open with his jack-knife, and after in
serting one of my troches he heroically
stepped back In five minutes Judge Cal
Iahan had taken his seat again, and
upon being shown" he changed the SEN
tence to ten days in a dining-room car.
His honor says that one troche saved
his life, and he has ordered barrel of
them.
Deacon Arnold, Of wisconsin, a man
y
of integrity, writes us that he was one
of the greased-pole contestants at a late
county fair. There was a plug OF to-
bacco at the top. and the deacon deter
mined to claw 1t on or die trying. In
fact, he had to have 1t, having been out
of plug for a whole week While near
ing the top Of the pole, however, his
hands slipped and he came down with
an estimated force of 1000 pounds to the
square acre. He was pronounced as dead
as a bump on a log, and his widow mao
got him dumped into the wagon to take
home, when a drummer who was flirting
with a milIiner in the crowd paused long
enough to administer one Of my Knock
Outs. Inside of ten minutes the elder
was running a foot race with the boys.
What I have written about some oil
these cases borders on the miraculous,
but it is always that way with good
thing. You have been offered silver mine
stock at seven cents on the dollar, and
been told that it would go to 50 In a few
weeks. When il has not only gone to
so, but to 100 you have stood with open
mouth and dumb tongue
So truly marvellous is the case OF Col.
Dinkle, of Vermont, that we hesitate to
give it, though at the same time urged
by a strong sense OF duty toward suffer-
ing humanity. The colonel was at the
battle Of Gettysburg. That was the main
reason why Lee retreated. This state
ment is made to give you confidence in
the colonePs word. He writes that about
a month ago he was kicked by cow,
a mule and a horse at the same time.
1t was a triangular kicking match, with
a battIe-scarred hero as the victim.
For half an hour the colonel was
thought to be dead, and his relatives
were fighting over his old sword of Bun
ker Hill, when he came to. 1t was only
to be attacked by double pneumonia and
typhus fever, however, and the seven
doctors that had his case said that un-
less a miracle was wrought he'd fill a
grave meath the willow.
A miracle was wrought. One of the
beef trust agents happened to be in the
vicinity looking up veal to make canned
lobster andhquail of, and he had a packet
of my Knock EN- Outs in his pocket
For price, he was induced to part with
three troches. No beef trust man parts
with anything for nothing. The three
were sufficient, however. Two knocked
out the pneumonia, and the other the
fever, and in five days the colonel was
taking his morning nip from the same old
demijon. Write to him for further de-
tails
Great! Marvelousi Miraculous! and
bushels of testimonials coming in through
the window every few minutes! Dis
charge your family doctor. Advise your
druggist to trade of his shop for a saw
miHi Arm yourselves with my Knock
EN- Outs and you'll begin to feel that
life holds a thousand Joys for you where
before it was only sorrow and mighty
thin molasses.