The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1913-08-28
A YOUNG MANS
SCHEME
By M. QUAD
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1918, by Associated Lit
erary Press.


and mutter:
"And I'll make her love me before
I'm through with her! She may think
l don't amount to shucks. but all !
want is a chance to prove that l do.
Durn farm work! Durn widders! Durn
love! Durn everything"
He kicked the fence to show his dis
gust and YEARLY resumed work. Ebe-
nezer Scherrherhorn. hired man, was
in love with the Widow Tompkins,
whose farm adjoined that of his boss
on the west. Ebenezer was twenty
four years old, plain of face and un
calmly of form and without n hundred
dollars worth of property.
One evening as he dropped in to see
the widow about borrowing some farm
implement next day he found her read
ing love story. She read few chap
tiers to him and afterward acknowl-
edged that she had always been ro'
mantle and that If she ever married
again it would be to hero.
The farmers hired man didn't rush
right off that night and try to be hero.
but sat down and did some thinking.
Three or four days after Ebenezers
thinking bee tramp came along the
road and. seeing the young man hoeing
corn just over the fence, halted for a
word or two. Ordinarily Ebenezer
would have leaped the fence and run
Jta hale n nltln hlt this
occasion he invited him over to the
corn and sat down with him for a con
fidential conversation. The result of
that conversation was that at s
o'clock that evening the tramp appear
ed before the Widow Tompkins and
made threats of what he would do II
she didn't set out victuals. hunt up old
clothes and come down with dollar
in cash.
Ebenezer was not far away-just far
enough to come running up and knock
the tramp head over heels and rescue
the widow. But as he started to come
running he fell down and got tangled
up with the bushes, and before he
toulu Stl away lnc VIM" hd'i piooib
sticked the tramp into flight. She
didn't say she was glad that the would
be hero was so near at hand. What
she did say was that she wasn't afraid
of any tramp walking the roads,
Ebenezer's first try was failure,
but within a fortnight he was ready
for another. Two or three farmhouses
in the township had been robbed, and
this fact became the basis for his see-
ond plan. One night at midnight he
left his bed, descended to earth by
way of window. and. armed with a
club, he became guard for the wild
ow's house He circled around it and
patroled the garden and the orchard.
and he felt that he would give a year
of his life If a robber would appear
He would first fell him and then arouse
the house. and when the widow came
to know that he had been guarding her
him.
But no 'obber came. Instead Of that
his footsteps awoke the widow, and,
peering out, she saw some one walking
about, and she got shotgun and raised
a window and blazed away. The gun
was loaded with bird shot to shoot
hawks that might come swooping down
on chickens, but in this case they an
swered just as well for a man. Eben
ezer received about twenty Of them
and ran two miles to a doctor to have
them picked out He also had va.
cation from work for week under
the excuse that he had sprained his
back turning over in bed.
Ninety-nine out of every hundred
would be heroes would have given W
right here. but Ebenezer was a man
TO hang on. 1t was while he was limp
ing around on his vacation and doing
over the fields that he came upon the
widow fishing in the river ut certain
point. He did not show himself. but
fifty feet from where she sat under u
tree he discovered bumblebees nest
in the grass. 1t was Il large and lib,
eral nest. and it gave him thought.
The bees wouldn't bother anybody so
long as they were let alone. II stirred
up they would look for meat.
There was a haystack not far away,
and Ebenezer Mad matches In his
pocket. He retired behind the stack
and collected hatful Of stones from
the plowed land. These he threw one
by one at the spot where the bees
were pursuing the even tenor Of their
ways. The plot thickened. You can
thicken bumbebee plot In very
short time. All you've got to do is to
tread on their coattails. When the In.
sects found the rocks dropping on their
heads they swarmed out Of the grass
to look for the enemy. They should
have seen the widow and descended
upon her, and at her first shrek Eb.
enezer would come charging down
with wlsp OF lighted hay In either
hand. But things went wrong. Ths
bees then went for him alone. They
ran him up and down the haystack
they ran him over fences and back
they ran him across lots and In circles
and when they finally left him and he
fell down the widow came forward and
asked:
But why were you such foolT'
Because | want you to marry me"'
he groaned In reply. And you said
you would marry hero. thought the
bees would attack you and could rush
in and save YOU
why. you great idiot! I've been
ready to say yes any day for the last
three months"
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