The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-12-25
DER GERMAN COBBLER.
He Is Not . Success rs . Story

peesness dot you don't haf twice a.
much?"
'.It vhas der tariff says.
dot vhas wrong"
1T vhas Mexico"
1T can't be-"
Den 1t vhas hard times''
Don't be a fool. Hans! You lose
your peesness because you don't be
sociable. You sit here like a bump
on q log, and you don't even say it
vhas a nice, day to q customer. II
some one asks you about politics you
shake your head and grunt and don't
say word
but 1 don't hat any time"
Den you should take time. Vhon
a man goes to hardware store to
buy a paper of carpet tacks he vhas
in devil of a hurry and gets right
out. When ne goes to a cobblef shop
to get a cement patch on his shoe he
WANTS to be entertained for q couple
of hours. II you don't make 1t nice
for him he don't come again.
Il vhas all der time thinking about
Germany. und how can I talk?"
I said.
"Cut out Germany for a while. You
can cut out politics. too. Can't you
tell story?'
IT belief could. What shall it be ?''
you shall tell either q funny or .
you vhas q sad man by nature you
had better stick to that line il you
vhant to make a hit.r
thought over it for an hour, and
dot eafings put a sign in my window
dot reads:
Jonah and the whale. Come in
and the cobbler will tell you the sad
story" s
The first man in der shop next
morning vhas fat and good-natured.
and he licked his chops und smiled At
me ash he sat down und said:
Let 'er go. cobbler.
You like some story" said.
You betcher life!sia
.aThe sadder the better. I have inst
lost q horse worth. $500, and I want
"vhen Z tell you about Jonah und
der whale. You must know dot once
upon a time dere lived q man named
Jonah"
"Ha! ha. ha!' laughs der fat man.
ash he slaps his leg.
What is it?'' asks
dot name. Jonah. It is also my
name. 1t makes me laugh every time
hear it. Ha! ha! hal"
|. HE vhas q good mans"
TT vhas shust der same init me-ha!
ha! ha!'' "a
WAS IL some SMOKES O0CduSo yOu
vhas good?" asks.
Der biggest kind! Excuse me when
I go ha! ha! hal"
don't see der shoke, but I keep
on, and say:
dot Jonah he work hard und pays
his debts, und When lection day comes
| around he votes der straight ticket"
dot vhas me again-ha! ha! hal"
laughs der mans.
1
Dis vhas no laughing story. It vhas a
sad story
II know 1t vhas. but can't help but
say ha! ha! hat"
! Dis man Jonah don't hat no bad
habits. He don't drink. smoke. chew
nor swear. He don't even go by der
moving pictures
| ''Und vhas dot mans-ha! ha. ha!''
he says.
Nobody ever hears dot he ticks his
wife"
NO, I nef.er did,
| He neffer vhas drunk in his life
dot vhas me again-ha! ha! hat"
Look here, mans,'' 1 says. 81 vhas
telling you q sad story. 1t vhas q
story to weep over, und yet you go ha!
ha! ha! all der time!"
Yes. know-ha! ha! ha!s'
But why do you do IT."
| <$4uSS ~ VHAS 20 1unnYs
Maybe you know What happened to
Jonah?"
Il do. He vhas swallowed By a whale
I-ha! ha! hal"
''Und don't you call dot sadness?.
Not much! 1t vhas SO funny dot ]
hat to go ha! ha! ha. every time
think of it,
II you vhas in some whales belly
don't You feel sad over it?''
1 eeNn fr v,fo =
laugh und make der whale laugh. too
Go on init your story
Jonah. he don't get one bite from
der whale
Dot vhas good-ha! ha. has..
he don't hat to stay down in dol
belly but a few days. Den he come
out und swtms ashore
Dot vhas me- Does he go homer
Does he tell his wife an ahout II ,.
II think he does
Ond does she believe him -
Dot. vhas der sod part or my stor,
l-ehe don't :
She don't. eh-ha! ha! ha!- lansh,
dot mans dot tickles me. Dot ~,
iunny- Cobblcr. I vhas glad come
u here. You half told me der funniesl
story I hat heard In years.
You mistake II vhas : safi .tcr-v
oh. 10 funny-ha! ha. hn.., .
- belief 1t vhas better you 70 ONT
vn bel II you say 70, but L don't thinl
{o toy ~ vnrs : .t Eood mans. come n hees
IKE child because lo5e Z 81 hoess r.
sss Sc &, IS s. ~ a.. funny DOT = 81
=. ! t ,.s BIN p der arm md ,.ss h.u i.
Soils 0a &c. nae ~ E: l se go e
down yhe1 Uoman1 ceu3e1 IN un4 40