davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Kissed and Made Up

'Hah, hah. your old times; hate them!
exclaimed the lady.
And l love them.' replied the squire.
Il love everything that's old; old
friends, old times. old manners, old books.
old wine-and l believe, Dorothy. you
will own that I am pretty fond of an old
wife"
And the squire took his wifes hand
and, with a courtly bow, kissed 1t like
a Sir Charles Grandson.
But the word ''old' still ranked little,
though the lady could not help being mol
lified and said, with a fiirt of her fan;
La, Mr.. Hardcastle. If you are deter
mined to play Darby assure you l will
not play JOAN"
Then they kissed and made up, as tha
worthy couple always did after one OF
their tiffs.
Other inmates of the old mansion-which
Mrs Hardcastle declared was a ''rumb-
ling" old house that looked like an inn,
except that they saw no company-were
Tony Lumplxin, Mrs. Hardcastle's son by
her first marriage; her daughter by the
squire. Kate Hardcastle, and Mrs. Hard
castles niece, Constance Neville
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Alone With His Destiny

Presentations were made all around
and, in spite of the beseeching looks
and broken sentences of protest, Hast
ings and Constance hurriedly left the
room.
Looking at the floor, working his
hands nervously and awkwardly, Mar
low made most lamentable failure of
trying to talk in complimentary
manner Kate had to take up the un-
finished sentences which were left ly-
ing all about him and carry them to
their end
As last the man actually bolted. with
a hasty and incoherent remark about
having to see Hastings right away
We'll" thought Kate, 'he certainly
is we'll enough to look at, but, bless me,
what q bashful fellow. He seems to
have good sense, but it is so absurd un-
der his bashfulness that 1t fatigues
more than Ignorance.
IF l could teach him a little conf
dence ] would be doing somebody a
good turn. But who is that somebody ?
That, faith, I cannot answer
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
One of the Executions

There were exceptions, of course, and
Mrs. Hardcastle, as has been intimated'
was one Of these. The pernicious example
of some Of her neighbors had unsettled
the good woman's content.
Though 60, Mrs. Hardcastle affected
eternal youth and had mind on fashion
bent.
Il VOW Mr. Hardcastle," she would say,
sis there a creature in the whole country
but ourselves that does not take trip
to London now and then to rub off the
rust?" why, there's our neighbors, the
Miss Boggs and Mrs. Grigsby, go to town
every year to take months polishing"
Yes" would retort the squire, "and
bring back vanity and affectation enough
TO last them a whole year. I wish Lon
don would keep its fools and Its folies
at home. In the old times
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
A CL AS SIC
IN A P A G E
Copyright, 1913. by Irving King. All
rights reserved.)


Gosse says in MS History of Eng
lish Literature" That she stoops to
Conquer" is the best known of Gold
smiths works. It is i'll dsputing such a
high authority, but if 1t be as he says.
then the Vicar of Wakefield" and "The
Deserted Village run a close race, at
least with that comedy in the mara
fhon. of popularity wherein are entered
the works of DR.. Goldsmith.
There is something about "She Stoops
to CONQUER which Inevitably reminds
one of Sheridan. sheridan's school for
Scandal" was produced four years af-
ter "She Stoops 70 Conquer'-and' to
quote Mr. Gosse again, and this time
to agree with him fully-ts the only
comedy of that era which can compete
with Goldsnith's comedy as regards
lasting popularity.
But in "She Stops to Conquer" there
Is a robustness which Sheridan never
had, however much he might affect 1t.
And the comedy is robust without be-
ing coarse.
Tony Lumpkin vas certainly not a
refined character-but, after all, he was
not coarse in the real sense of the
word He was a good natured lout, but
his pothouse companions always called
him the young squire, and he kept them
at a little distance. even over the
punch bowl.
The wonderful things about She
Stoops to Conquer is that. while the
characters in t and the author of 1t
lived In another age. under conditions
which we can only imagine--old times
long passed away--it all seems so nat
ural-so almost modern. And. after all
that Is one great test of enduring lit
erature.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Film Making Enterprise

H. H. Windsor in the February Popular
Mechanics Magazine.
The energy, effort and expense incurred
ty the daily press in its desire to Sc
cure for its readers the earliest obtainz
able information of important events has
lcng been a source of credit to enterpris-
ing publishers and of wonder to Their
readers. For cent or two one may OBJ
tain news to secure which reporters have
1eopardized their lives and thousands OF
dollars have been spent. Quite an inter-
esting, though less thrilling, would be tho
stories the public never hears, of equally
efforts which resulted in failure.
The glory of original and daring in
it1ative in these matters no longer is
mcnopolized by the dailies, for the MAX
ers of films for moving pictures are exhib-
ting the same resourceful spirit.
Whether in their anxiety to give the pub
lie what it wants they are tempted to
eac~oach on subjects which in the past
have been considered too sacred for or
binary exhibition is disputed question
eyen among the clergy. However, we will
content ourselves with a recital OF what
las just been accomplished.
one hundred thousand dollars was spent
IN making film entitled. From the
Manager of the Cross In order to pro-
cure this company of ~ players were
selected, trained and taken to Palestine
ard Egypt, with all the necessary NOV
atle scenery and effects. Skilled work
men were taken along to erect such scenes
as the stable and manfer in Beeelehem
THE curiosity OF the natives W11o con-
tinually swarmed about the actors and
cnerators made the work difficult, but
after four months OF constant work IN
v.hich scene after scene was rehearsed
DOZENS of times, the picture story was fin
ely completed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Sent Along to the Old Bucks Head

The men declared that they could travel
no further that night: they had no idea
it was so far to the Hardcastle hall; they
must rest at the inn until the morrow
when they would continue their journey.
$50 this is my sisters destined spark
and another town gentleman, is it?'
thought Tony, and then declared thai
they were miles and miles from the hall
And there are no beds to be had here
for love or money tonight continued he.
But now l bethink me, why not you
gentlemen go OMIT is only little way,
mile further, to the Old Bucks Head.
1t is on the hill, stands near the road
and is one of the best inns in the county.
But / must tell vow. thou~h the lorn-
lord is rich and thinks of going out of
business. He wants to be thought a gem
tleman. He will insist upon giving you
his company and If you mind him he
will persuade you that his mother was
an alderman and his aunt justice OF
the peace. But he keeps good wines
And Tony saw the travellers on their
way to his stepfather's house with a glee
which was shared by his companions in
another bowl of punch.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Assisting an Elopement

Meantime matters had been moving
rapidly in the love affair Of the intended
elopers, Hastings and Constance Neville.
They had enlisted Tony on their side.
What would you do. Tony" asked Con-
stance, for anyone who would take me
away from here so that there would never
be any danger of your being forced to
marry me?''
'Do?" replied Tony, anything short of
murder that an honest fellow might Who
is hep
Matters were explained to him. He was
delighted.
'Ill get the jewels for you. too, cous-
in,' he said. "They are yours, you are
of an age to have them; they were to
bave been given you long ago by your
fathers will.
eMother has got no right to keep them;
that much / know. / have keys to all
her bureau drawers-else how do you sup
pose L am able to spend so much money
at the ale house.
."And will get couple Of fresh horses
to put 20 the post chaise. Be at the foot
of the garden in half an hour
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
ElOpement Planned

To this Miss Neville was not at all
ayerse. but, like the prudent girl she
was, desired to get possession first, If
possible, of a portion OF her fortune.
which consisted OF jewels safely re-
posing in a jewel box lockedsup in her
aunt's old mahogany bureau
Besides, the horses with which Mar
low and Hastings had travelled were in
no condition to continue the. journey
just at present and ways must be de-
vised to get fresh cattle.
NARROW entered while they were con-
ferring.
my dear Charles" said Hastings, "a
most fortunate accident. Miss Neville,
my betrothed, and Miss Hardcastie,
your future wife, have just alighted at
the inn. Allow me, Mr.. NARROW, Miss
Neville"
NARROW was scared at the idea OF
meeting Miss Hardcastle and began TO
stammer something about his "disor-
dered Dress" tomorrow" and the like.
when there entered Kate Hardcastle,
still in the finery which her father
allowed her to wear before supper
time and also having on a large bon
net-for she had Just been on a visit
to one of the cottages where a child
was lying Ill.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Trouble Brewing

Valiantly did he endeavor to tell the
tale until at last NARROW turned to him
impatiently and said: MY good friend,
never mind the Duke of Marlborough
pray give us a glass of punch
The squire's eyes almost popped out
of his head.
And this young man was represent
ed to me as SO bashful that he could
not say boo to goose-this is the most
unaccountable sort of modesty l have
ever heard Of"
But he gave them punch and was
starting in on his story of Prince Eu-
gene when they Interrupted him by de-
manding supper.
In short the two young men con-
tinued to act as il they actually were,
as they supposed themselves to be, in
an inn kept by a fussy and presumptu-
Gus landlord; and the squire was doing
his best to act the hospitable part, but
with a rising ire which he had hard
work to keep down.
NARROW demanded to be shown the
sleeping quarters which they might
have, and he and the squire. leaving
Hastings alone sin the room, who
should enter but Constance Nevillel
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Her Future Husband

Now squire Hardcastle had an old
friend, Sir Charles NARROW, and Sir
Charles had son, Charles Having the
permission of his lady to dispose of the
hand of Kate, Mr.. Hardcastle had writ
ten to Sir Charles proposing an alliance
between his daughter and Sir Charles
son, proposition which was joyfully ac-
ceded to.
Sir Charles wrote that he had given
his orders to his son; that he had sent
him down to Hardcastle Hall to see his
future bride, and that he himself would
arrive at his old friends house couple
of hours or so after the arrival of young
Charles.
The squire was joyous when he got
the letter, and at once announced to
Kate that her future husband was to
arrive that night-even told her his name.
Kate. being fancy free, took the mat
ter philosophically, anu asked what sort
of man had been picked out for her.
1T is a thousand to one" said she, that
l shall not like him."
81 am told that he is a young man OF
excellent understanding" said the squire
"and very generous"
Il believe l shall like him." said Kate
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09

K HR. HARDCASTLE, country
MI squire of the old fashioned sort.
lVl lived in his old fashioned house
down in the country and hated Lon
don and all its works He had seen
the great city only once or twice in
his life and his wife had never seen II
though her heart yearned for it and
its fashions.
This was in the days when men MADE
their Wills before going up TO the
metropolis, when even stage coaches
were an innovation, and as for the
steam railway the idea of such con-
triyance was as absent from men
minds as wireless telegraphy.
Squire Hardcastle had two excellen'
stories of historical interest. one con-
oerning the Duke of Marlborough-un-
der whom his uncle, Col. Wallop' mao
served-and one about the Prince Eu-
gene.
The other story which he told was mol
of historical value, but was allowed &c
ne the most humorous recital possible
The squire called it "Grouse in the Gun
ROOM" and his servants and acauaint'
ances had laughed at it for so many years
that they did so now out of sheer force
of habit, enjoying their cachinnations
more and more, and the story, too, az
the years went by.
Nothing newfangled was allowed at the
hall by it's master or by the majority
of its inmates, even In the way of stories
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Her Mother Nature

Tony, she had decided, was 70 marry
her niece, Miss Neville. This would unite
the fortunes of the two-which fortunes
were both in her keeping--wheFe she
thought they did mighty well.
AS to Kate-why she would 6 hey the
eouire to dispose of Kates hand She
was an easy boss.
1t has been said that Mrs Hardcastle
had but two failings a love of fashion
and a horror of age. The way she al
lowed that great lout of a Tony to grow
up In ignorance. to pass his time at the
tavern or in the stables, at cock fights
and boxing matches, was accounted By
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Making Love to Tony

Miss Neville sized up her aunt, said
nothing and kept up a correspondence
With Hastings.
She apparently lent herself to her aunt S
scheme of marrying her to Tony. and for
tlis reason Tony strongly objected, de
elared he would not marry her, fled her
presence and became profane when his
mother commanded the alliance.
In fact she got much amusement out
OF the situation and could divert herself
ac any time amid the dullness of the
hall by pretending to make love to Tony
and see him flee In a rage to the Three
Pigeons, the village tavern.
Tony imagined that 1t was a put up
Job between his mother and Miss New
ille and fought against it with all tha
strength of his loutish nature-though
shedding tears in secret. sometimes, at this
awful thought that some time he might
be compelled 10 surrender to their com
blned attacks.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Unexpected Welcome

When the two travellers drove up be-
fore the gate of the old mansion servants
who had been expecting their arrival ran
to take the horses to the stables. unloa I
the luggage and usher MARROW and Hast
ings into the great entrance hall of the
house.
Upon my word" said NARROW, looking
around. upon my word, very creditable
house. The usual fate of such big man
sions as this. Having ruined its former
masters by good housekeeping 1t now,
"a the guise OF an inn. lesies contribu-
tions upon travellers
Yes" repiied Hastings, and | should
ne better pleased eith an inn not quite
so manorial in appearance. l have al
ways 70 nj that piece of carved oak
like that, or a great marble chimney piece
like that, goes TO swell the bill uncon-
scionably at an inn.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
What Did 1t All Mean

Charles, upon being summoned be-
fore his father and the squire flatly
denied the corridor incident.
He had been introduced to Miss Hard
castle upon his arrival at the hall and
spoken but half dozen words to her,
and had never seen her after.
He must decline to stay any longer un-
der a roof where he had been so cruelty
practiced upon, and. as to Miss Hard
castle, he trusted that at some future
time he might have the pleasure of a
further acquaintance with her-but not
now.
Charles was sent away and the squire
and the baronet looked at each other.
Who was the liar? What did it all
mean?
While they were discussing the ques-
tion Kate came in and laughingy told
them that If they would hide behind the
screen in the back part of the room in
half an hour she would satisfy them as
to the whole matter They agreed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
At the Three Pigeons

When night fell that day the squire
at the hall was busy with his prepara-
tions to receive his guests, drilling the
servants taken from the stable and the
plow. whom he had added to his house,
hold servants in order to make a show,
and seeing that the great kitchen smoked
with the preparation of robust country
fare that should do credit to the enter
tainment of the hall.
Tony LumplSin had fled to the Three
Pigeons, and there. with his chosen
companions, Dick Muggins, the excise
man; Jack Slang. the horse doctor. and
Il boxer and a cockfignter or two, was
holding high revel.
The night fell dark and rainy, with
wind sweeping across the country-a very
beast of night for traveller. unaccus-
toned to the unmarked ways of the coun-
try. to be abroad In.
The landlord Interrupted the festivi-
ties of Tony and his cronies to say that
there were two gentlemen in post
chaise at the door who had lost their
way and were asking something about
old sdhire Hardcastle.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Material for a Joke

They look woundily like Frenchmen,"
said the landlord, who had caught a
glimpse of the city attire of the trav-
eiers.
Send them up cried Tony, scenting a
practical joke, "and you fellows retire a
little while"
The landlord returned, ushering in two
rather bedraggled travellers, evidently
from London, who declared that they were
on their way to the house of Squire Hard
castle and had lost their way.
Tony winked at the landlord to back him
up in what he should say and began to
question them with a shrewdness which
persons of his loutish character not in
frequently display when there is a prac.
tical joke in hand.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Sent to Await Sentence

The letter was delivered to Tony in
the presence of Mrs. Hardcastle and Miss
Neville. Tony, having some difficulty
In reading the written word, his mother
snatched the letter from his hand and
read it herself.
Here was a situation
Tony got a cuff on the ear and was
driven from the room; Miss Neville was
ordered to prepare for an immediate jour-
ney to the house Of ner aunt, old Lady
Pedigree. who lived at a distance of 80
miles from Hardcastle Hall, and there to
stay immured under strict supervision un-
til further orders.
Mrs. Hardcastle made her exit in a
fury. shouting directions for coach and
horses for the journey and ordering Tony
TO be ready to accompany her as postil-
li0r.
Hastings, tired of waiting. returned to
the house to see what was anliss. He
found out.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Charles on His Dignity

But poor Charlesl He gathered at
the dignity he could; he apologized in
the most abject terms he demanded to
see Hastings at once.
When Hastings put in an appearance
he asked If he had known of this grave
mistake Hastings was Obliged to con-
fess that he had and had kept it Sc
cret from Charles Charles suggested
a duel at once
"oh. bother your duels," cried Hast
tngs and taking NARROW aside he told
him of his own adventures.
Nevertheless NARROW gave orders that
his servants be called, drunk or sober,
and horses put % his travelling car
riage-he could stay in Hardcastle Hall
no longer. He was crushed absolutely;
all his bumptiousness evaporated.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Sir Charles Arrives

Just at this juncture the arrival Of
Sir Charles NARROW was announced
The squire, still ignorant of the sudden
departure of his Wife and her niece
but filled with the good joke of young
Marlows mistake, went to meet his old
friend and tell him the story.
And how had Charles got on with
Kate? Indifferently, well--but trust
Kate for that Tt would be all right;
the squire had caught the young rogue
trying to catch hold of Kate's hand in
the corridor. But here comes Kate her
self.
After Sir Charles had saluted her
with a kiss as the child of his old
friend. the girl corroborated all that
her father had said concerning the in
teryiew in the corridor.
"I guess it's a match" cried Sir
Charles "and now run away, Kate,
and we'll see Charles and settle the
matter before we sit down to supper"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
When He Was Not Bashful

MARROW did not recognize her at all;
when he had been introduced he had not
seen her face, and then, this simple habit
she had on,
by Jove,'' said he, "did anybody ever
tell you you were beautiful"
Then he began his phlandering-with
barmaids he was not bashful At last
he attempted to seize her hand. But
Kate bade him keep his distance, and he
disappeared into his parlor upon hear
ing his supposed landlord coming.
well. neverl" exclaimed the squire;
did l not see him try to take your hand ?
Is this your modest, bashful fellow? Who
is right now?'
Il am" said Kate "Give me another
hour and I'll prove it,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Watching His Joke

Meantime Mrs. Hardcastle had appeared
ON the scene, gotten up in the extreme
London style of the year before last
which she had out of a fashion paper
and the willy Hastings, who was intro.
duced by Constance as town acquaint.
ance of hers, engaged the old lady by
paving her series of most outrageous
compliments upon her 'town-bred style e
Tony had returned to the hall to see
how his joke was working, and Con
stance had at once settled him by pre-
tending to make love TO him.
NARROW and the Squire were not much
in evidence-Marlow. in his violent en-
deavors to avoid Kate, keeping his sup
posed landlord busy furnishing him with
private parlor and fire. before which
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
Plans Disturbed

Tony got the jewels and turned the
box over to Hastings. Hastings sent
1t to NARROW, asking him to place it
under the seat of the post chaise
How absurd" thought NARROW. "He
says the box is valuable; the place for
1t then is in the custody of the land
lady,
And he sent one of his own servants
who had been getting drunk, below stairs
with the box TO Mrs. Hardcastle.
The befildered woman was for having
everybody looked up at first; but by
the time she had double locked the Jewels
again something else of more Importance
took her whole attention.
Hastings went to the foot of the gar
den and found the post chaise there with
fresh horses. lndiscreetly he scribbled
a note and sent it by his own servant to
Tony. telling him that he was there with
the post chaise and to bring Miss Ne
vile at once or Mrs. Hardcastle would
suspect.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
The Squire Understands

Meantime, the squire and Charles
Marlow had come to an understanding
Unable to bear the insolenee of the
young man longer. Squire Hardcastle
had flown into a rage and ordered him
out of the house.
"Who do you think 1 am. sir? What
do you mean, you puppy? I am Squire
Hardcastle and this is my house. your
father, my old friend Sir Charles'
should have been here before now.
Il have put up with your insolence
long enough. / will not even await the
arrival of your father, sir. Get out
Bewildered, shocked, amazed. Infinite
ly distressed, Chtarles NARROW stan-
mered out the truth-told him how he
had been directed to the place as an
inn and the rest OF it%
20 hol Tony, the 1out, the rascal,
cried the squire, at once perceiying the
practical joke OF his promising step
son.
And then he laughed as heartily at
the adventure as Tony himself could
have wished.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-09
His Rashfulness Cured

Charles dropped on his knees and be-
gan to pour out his love, when sud
denly his father burst from behind the
screen and cried out:
Charles. Charles. ! can stand 1t no
longer. How have you deceived me? Is
this your Indifference to Miss Hardcastle
your formal conversations"
Then popped out the squire and then
II all popped out that, without know
ing 1t, Charles had been wooing Kate
Hardcastle
Foolish Charles stammered something
about her humble dress, and the witty
Kate replied. 20. this is the dress
wore when / played the barrnaid and
stopped to conqner."
Charles got an awful bashfu fit and
was for leaving the house again. But
they turned him over captive to Kate
and he was there that night, sitting at
her side without blush or a stammer.
when the long-delayed supper at length
was served.