davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
What's on tie Program IN
Washington Today

The following Masonic organizations
will meet tonight: Lodges-Harmony.
No. II, n. NJ; George C. Whiting, No.
-, annual election and banquet
Royal Arch. Chapters-School of In
struction-, Knights Templar-Wash
Star Chapters-Naomi. No. 8. colonial
party: Brookland. No. II. grand vis-
itation.
The following I. o. o. +. organizations
will meet tonight: Lodges-Eastern.
No. 4; Harmony. No 9. and Federal
City, No. %. degree; Friendship. Ne.
12. business. Encampment-Colum-
bian. No. !. business.
The following knights Of Pythias or
ganizations will meet tonight: Lodges
Mt. Vernon. No. 5; Hermione. No.
u; Union. No. p. Columbia, No. IS.
Pythian sisters-Friendship Temple.
No. Q.
The following Red Mems organizations
will meet tonight: Saltese Tribe. No.
1S: White Eagle Council. No. 4
Concert by the United States Soldiers
Home Band Orchestra, Stanley Hall,
Lecture by DIR. Howard A. Kelly on
THE Church and the Public at Large
in Social Service" the First Congre-
gational Church, D. m.
der the auspices of the Monday Even
ing Club. the Public Library. tonight
Benefit entertainment and dance under
the auspices of the washington Photo
Engravers Union, National Rifles
Armory. tonight
Meeting of the Builders and Manufac-
turers' Exchange. p. m.
Meeting Of the Brightwood Park Cit-
zens' Association. Van Horn Hall.
Georgia avenue and Longfellow street.
D. m.
Meeting for stenosraphers interested in
pageant; fourth floor. McGili building,
Ninth and G streets. L to ] O'Clock.
Luncheon served, George Preston, man
ager, Mrs. Gutenberg speaker.
Meeting of department women INTEREST
ed i'm payeant. open air, Seventeenth
street, south of G, 1850 O'Clock: speak
er, Miss Elsie Hill
Erightwood Park Citizens Association,
54S5 Twenty-second street northwest.
O'Clock. Mrs. William Kent viii;
talk on the pageant
Meeting 70 pageant women. Logan Ho-
lei. iowa circle and Thirteenth street.
o'clock; speakers, Miss Elsie Hill.
Mrs. NJ E.. Allender. and Wisdom
Brown. r-
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
THIS& THAT
W,tA Sometimes q Lskt1e sfthe olhe-


SPLITTING IT WITH GILBERT.
When the gay hotellish keeper isn't
keeping
The strangers ready currency and
such,
From most ev'ry nook and Granny
ways are leaping
For visitors to get themselves in
Dutch.
You will hardly know one pocketbook
from t'other,
Next week, when all the visitors are
dones.
Taking one consideration with another,
The strangers lot is not a happy
When the coin is in the Golfers and the
visitors are done,
The strangers lot is not q happy one,
happy one.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
GOOD STORIES
Doing Full Justice.

LAWSUIT was recently in full
n swing. and during its progress
~ witness was cross-cxamined
u as.to the habits and character
of the defendant.
Has Mr.. NJ reputation Tor bcihS
abnormally Lazy" asked counsel,
briskly.
well, sir, it's this way
will YOU kindly answer the ques ton
esked?" struck in the irascible lawyer.
well. sir. was going TO say it's this
way: I don't want to do the gentle
man in question an injustice. And !
wont 60 so far as to say. sir. that he's
lazy. exactly; but, II 1t required any vol
untary work on his part to digest his
food-why, he'd die from lack of nour-
ishment, sir."-AnSwers.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
Gui debook to Gallantry.

chide yourself for having eaten bread
and butter all these years with such
lavish recklessness and an utter lack
Of appreciation
In closing, let me say that when you
have given kalf your income to the
waiter as q tip, and he hasn't even
muttered a benediction. don't be
downcast. Go out and slip the hi
1artous hatboy what remains Of your
sinking fund. and the only thing
that's up to you now is to steer your
girl due north before she hears the
piteous appeal OF the taxicab bandit!
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Twill be impossible, we're sorry to
say, to monoplane the price Of this
titteracious turret during inaugweelI
and thereby hangs tale. IT being
against our policy to shortchange on
the auality-need We say more.-a
third alternative. as the Star" would
put 1t, Is to take It out Of the guam
tity. This last scheme appealed to us
strongly; but the makeup man
swore by the p. o. clock that he'd
leave the remaining space blank II
We fell short of a column. Rather
than countenance so lavish a waste
of good paper, we regretfully agreed
to proceed as usual. And there's the
tale.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
What He Had to Say.

wv Gl-L. prisoner said the
- A justice. You have been
found guilty by the jury
and properly so on the
evidence. The law says that YOU NAV
be sentenced to hard labor for twenty
years. but before passing sentence upon
YOU / shall be glad to hear anything
you may wish to say.
II haven't anything to say, Judge, =
said the prisoner. except that hop7
your honor will remember that there Is
a CROWN feelin' in favor of single
term of six years. You might also bear
In mind that I've already served two
terms and there's ii decided prejudice
among think:n' people against Z
third
"Twenty-seven years.. roared his
honor.-Judge.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

SO many committees are there, in fact,
that we're starting to wonder what
they're all going to commit. What? t?
You shouldn't say such things
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
Amusements.

NationaI-John Mason in THE Attacs,'
a:ia and S:l5 y. m
Beiasco-''The Merry Countess. e:1S
and Sis p. m.
Columbia -"The Merchant OF Venice.
Sis p. IT.
chase s-Pollte vaudeville. 2:l5 and Sis
.roirs--The Man of the Hour" e:li
and sis p. m.
Academy-'The Country Boy Sis
p. M
C-osmos-VaudeNtile.
Cas;uo--Naudeviile.
!.yceum Sam Rice's Show els and
S:Is y. m.
Gayety-"M -"Merry -Go-Roundsrs." ::l5 and
S:Io 2. m.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Zero in things to read, to our mind,
is a two-column description of the order
of march of the suff- or inaugurades.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

The red flag TO a bull' simile is
herewith declared passe. The new one:
Green and white to an inaugcommit-
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Lamping the fracas in the House, W.
confess to a faint understanding o,
why they're called battleships.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Motto for Chief Kohler. of
Cleveland: It's golden rule
that doesn't work both ways.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Inaugural doings seem to be just one
darned committee after another.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

has been denied patent on dental in
lay work" Reminding us that we are
expecting to receive by any mail an in
vitation to participate in some dental
outlay work.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
Done is right.

II ever We have any money (cries of
Hear! Hear"), every inch of it will
so into the construction Of a hotel. to
be planted in this city. Said hotel viii
be open for two weeks every four years
well give You one guess which two-and
during the remaining 2os weeks we shall
tour the world, or give away libraries.
or star unknowns in musical comedies.
Or something of the kind. And the rest
Of It we'll pack away in barrels.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Prospective visitors, IL they knew It,
could spare themselves lot Of trouble
by staying at home and parcelpostins
their kale to washington, care of any
hotel or taxicab company.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
Well Bet There Isn't.

F'rom the ''star.)"
At inaugural headquarters 1t is
said that nothing is known there of
any plan to sell seats on inaugural
stands at low prices in competition
with suffragists' stands.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Rafting the skeleton: The inaugcom.
mittee advised merchants to carry
plenty of green and white decorating
materials In stock.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Prominent in inaug arrangements
Is the kind OF logic that says two
foot soap boxes are distractions, but
that grandstands that sprawl over
the whole sidewalk or street are not.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
FAMOUS IRON HANDS.
Huerta's.
Laundcrers.
Four Aces.

To remodel an old gag. a pepper-and-
salt suit. worn SO frequently in novels,
probably is one that has seen two sea-
sons
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

It's about over. Our guess Is that
Mexico will be on an inside page by
the day after tomorrow. and VIM
then simmer gradually. down to. an
Observation-Disclosures zero. But 1t had
us sitting up at night for the latest
while II lasted.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

Not that We consider the Dublin
stun essential to a pUlchritudinous ee-
feet. The most prettily decorated build.
ing in the city is chase's Theater, and
there isn't an inch of the inaugcolors
on II.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
vOTEs-FoR-WoMEN ARGUMENTS

NOTES-FOR-WOME ARGUMENTS
XIV.
From the "Post'D
The two-year imprisonment sentence
OF Ernest w. Gerbracht. convicted in
New York Of sugar customs frauds In
the prosecutions of 1910. was commuted
by President Taft TUESDAY to thirty
days in Jail. His fine OF 5000 was re-
mitted.
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

A local hotel man says his inausprices
are just, but he fails to state Just what
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

The finishing touches are being put
OH the finishing touches. -.--
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

cynic merely sentmenaist to whom life has been
with lemons dreamer who has been awakened With nigh
an ideaist po happened be plucng the flowers of ag
when the sprinkling cart Of Fate came BY
The Washington times., 1913-02-26
RESTAURANT CONDUCT.

LWAYS give the lady her choice
~ of restaurants; so that. In a
~ moment of pique, after she's
given you the grand bazoo, she
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

As soon as a womdn gives man the key to her heart
he has merely to prop open the door, and 60 of and
vay while he tries fen other locks
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

The difficult thing about getting married trying to
of good to friends for haping chosen
particular who happened to ask you
The Washington times., 1913-02-26

As far as girls heart is concerned, every man
in the a1iom ASK and ye shall receive" -
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
HARRY InAW WINS A pU,NI
Attorneys Plan to Carry Case to su.
 preme Court.

Western Newspaper Uaicu News Service
 Llttleton, N. Counsel for Harry Kendall Thaw laid the foundation for plans to cary his case to the Su. preme Court of the United States-if such step is found necessary. When 'he governor of New Hampshire pass es on the matter of the extradition of nav 10 New York at the hearing to De held at Concord. the findings. if ad- verse to Thaw, will be reviewed by the United States District Court. and should decision against him then be rendered, successive appeals will be taken until the case reaches the Su- preme Court.
 This was the announcement made by the Ihaw lawyers after the most mo- table court victory for the fugitive since his escape from the Matteawan asylum for the criminal insane. II was made after the hearing on fed. eral writ of habeas corpus. obtained III Thaw's behalf, and invoking the fourteenth amendment to the constitu- ton, had been indefinitely suspended unnl counsel saw fit to begin argu- ments after the eXtraditon matter had been decided by the governor.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Japanese Courtesy.

A country where courtesy is busi- ness, and business but a gentle avo- cation, reflects it's peculiarly in the most trifling details of conduct Such a country is Japan and such a detail recently came into notice when a city electric bureau of Tokyo asked the patrons on its street car lines how they preferred to be addressed when It was necessary to urge them to move up Out of the 2,719 sugges- tions sent in the Independent selects and translates six, as follows:
 Those not getting off, to the mid dle pleasel"
 The middle is more comfortable,"
 I'm sorry, but all move on by one strap,'
 There's a pretty girl about the middle of the carl"
 "A pickpocket has just come on board,"
 The municipal authorities frowned somewhat upon the last three sugges- tions, but the conductors will be taught to use some of the other forms.
 Is it possible that the Japanese hope to enjoy an efficient traction service on such terms? Apparently they hope to, and we pass along the Japanese idea as a helpful hint to the gentle men who jerk a gong on the hear of our own street cars
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
THE BEST TREATMENT FOR ITCHING SCALPS, DANDRUFF
 AND FALLING HAIR

To allay itching and irritation of the scalp, prevent dry, thin and falling hair, remove crusts, scales and dan druff. and promote the growth and beauty of the hair, the following spe- cial treatment is most effective, agree able and economical. On retiring. comb the hair out straight all around, then begin at the side and make a parting, gently rubbing Cuticura Oint- ment into the parting with bit of soft flannel held over the end of the finger. Anoint additional partings about half an inch apart until the whole scalp has been treated, the pur- pose being to get the Cuticura Oint- ment on the scalp skin rather than on the hair. It is well to place a light covering over the hair to protect the pillow from possible stain. The next morning, shampoo with Cuticura Soap and hot water. Shampoos alone may be used as often as agreeable, but once or twice a month is generally sufficient for this special treatment for women's hair.
 Cuticura Soap and Ointment sold throughout the world. Sample of each free. with 32-p. Skin Book. Address post card "Cuticura, Dept l., Boston. Adv
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Very Warm.

party of commercial travellers were drawing the long bow and spin ming yarns of wonderful adventures on sea and land A silent listener sat in the corner. Presently one ol the company addressed him
 Have you travelled much, sir?"
 "A little. I've been round the world seven times"
 Then you must have had some striking experiences. Perhaps you would like to tell us one or two"
 Well" said the stranger, perhaps the most remarkable was on my las, voyage. At one time we found the heat so terrific that we used to take it in turns to go down into the stoke hold to get a cooler"
 No more yarns were related that evening.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
MADE RULES FOR COMPOSERS
clan Himself, Laid Down lm- peratiVe Orders.

Frederick the Great was the most distinguished musical amateur of his age, and his position gave him the power to regulate the style of com position employed by the musicians Of his period. For instance, he made the following rules to be followed by operatic composers All the prin- cipal singers must have big arias and different in character. as an adagio aria, which must be very cantabile to show of to good advantage the voice and delivery of the singer; in de capo the artist can then display her art in embellishing variations; then there must be an allegro aria with brilliant passages, a gallant aria. duet for the first male singer and the prima donna, In these pieces the big forms of measure must be used so as to give pathos to the tragedy; the smaller forms of time, such as twofour and three-eight, are for the secondary roles, and for these a tenn pa minuetto can be written. There must be the necessary changes of time, but minor keys must be avoided in the theater, because they are too mournful."
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Government Vans Twine.

Wash!nston.-Some idea of the amount of mail handled by the post office department and energy requir- ed to prepare it is conveyed in q call issued by Postmaster General Burle- son for bids for 2,2O0,O0o pounds of tWlne with which to tie up letters. That even this amount may not be sufficient is indicated by the added appeal that inventors of substitute tying devices enter the competition for material, as it may be required by the postal service during the re mainder Of the year ending June 30, 1914"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
What She Wanted.

She walked into the public library and sweetly said:
 Il would like The Red Boat, please"
 The librarian diligently searched the catalogue and came back with:
 "1 don't think we have such a book"
 Flushing a bit, she said sweetly: May the title be The Scarlet Yacht?
 Again he looked, with the same re- suit. Then with her pretty fingers she dived into her bag, consulted a slip of paper, and said:
 "Oh. I beg your pardon meant the Rubiyat. "-Glasgow Weekly Herald.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
No More Publicity.

Washington.-Democratic members or the tariff conference committee, engaged in adjusting differences be. tween the two houses on the tariff bill. decided not to make public any further agreements until the conference work IS completed. Publication of agree ments during the past few days has brought many demands upon the con. ierees for the reopening of certain schedules, and they have determined hereafter to maintain silence.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Clotkes Bills larqe.

Chicago. There are a few women in Chicago who spend s75,000 a year on personal adornment, according to an estimate submitted at the semi-annual convention of the Chicago Dressmak. CTS Club. The dressmakers figured that the average factory girl spends $3.S4 week for clothing. These figures were arrived at by averaging the estimates made by the various delegates
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Rational Love.

The rational rather than the romantic. view of marriage is the one most in favor with the young people of the twentieth century" said Dr II. Lucas Wentworth, the well known eugenics expert, in an address in Cleveland.
 The rational view will make for happier marriages. And this rational view is beautifully illustrated in two questions-a little diologue-running thus:
 Will you always love me-
 "'Will you always be lovable?'"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Battleships to Remain.

Washing gto1.-American battleships probably will remain in Mexican waters, despite General Huerta's de claratiCn that they will be unwelcomt after another month. There was nc official expression of this govern ment's attitude but it was plainly in dicated that the United States vii keep it's vessels off the Mexican Pa cific coast and Atlantic coast as len as the present insecurity of American warrants.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Will Share salIivan's Wealth.

New rork.-The late Congressman Big Tim" Sullivans wealth will be shared equally by his brothers and sisters. His will. filed for probate divides the property among Mrs. Mar garet Hickey, Mrs. Mary Ann Sum- mers. Patrick H. Sullivan and Law renee Mulligan, a halffrother At one time Sullivan was said to be worth more than $2,000, ,000, but it is said his estate had dwindled since his illness.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Jap Battieships to China.

Tokyo,-A flotilla of Japanese tor pedo beat destroyers was dispatched by the admiralty 10 reinforce the war vessels ordered to Ranking recently. The Tokyo government fears further Gen Chang Huan, Chinese commander at Ranking, whose dismissal is re garded by the Japanese government as an indispensable condition for any settlement of the dispute.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Spaniards to Arkansas

New Orleans, La.-The steamship California of the French line reached port with GA passengers from Bor- deauX, France. Of those who attract ed more than ordinary attention. was a Spanish family en route from Corru, ma, Spain, to Clifton, Ark. It included Caveio Fernandez, Guineroinda Alvar- ez' IriYesta Alvarez, Dorothea and Isabelle Morrah.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
In the Stone Aae.

Here are sign words, professor. on the walls of this cave"
 50 l see"
 They tell. no doubt, a tale of great historical value"
 Not exactly. This is just the lease of the cave. Says the tenant must pay forty clamshells per month in advance and isn't allowed to keep dinosaurs, pterodactyls or sabre toothed tigers"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Judge Foster to Preside

Savannah, Ga.-United States Dis. trict Judge Rufus E. Foster of New Orleans has been directed to preside at the coming session of the United states District Court for the Southern district of Georgia in place of Judge Emory Speer, against whom charges are pending tefore Congress, accord ing to announcement here.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
A DOCTORS STATEMENT

J. K. Wells, Nj. D.. Weidners. Ark. writes "Ihave been practicing in Arkansas 20 years and constantly prescribe Mendenhall S Chill & Fever Tonic, where qunine is contra-in- dicated for children and adults with weak stomachs. It sticks where others fail" No cure no pay.-Adv.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
ThaW's Driver Freed.

Montreal-Lawyers interested in the prosecution of "Gentlman Robert" Thompson, the chauffeur who drove the automobile in which Thaw escaped from Matteawan announced that it had been agreed 10 drop the charges against Thompson.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Physicians Recommend Castoria

PASTORAL has met with pronounced favor the physicians pama
 cuca societies and medical authorities is used by physicians with results most gratifying The extended of Castoa unuesonab tho result of three c The ndsputabe evidence that it hamles not only aays stomach pains and qets the n but as at the od 7d- agreeable and perfect substitute for Castor 0 absolutely s It does not contain any Opium, Morphine other narcotic and does not supe unlike Soothing Syrp Banans D Goeys Cordial This is good deal for Medical Journal Our duty how danger and record the advancing h The day for poisoning innocent children through greed ignorance ought end To knowledge Casto remedy which produces mposure health by regulating the by stupeng iaud readers entitled the intormation.-HaUs Journal of HeaAh
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
For Sunburn. Insect Bites.

Ivy Poison or any other skin infam- nation us Tyree's Antiseptic Powder and get quick relief. 25c. at drug. gists. Sample sent free by J. S. Tyree, Washington. D. C.-Adv.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
RUB-MY-TlSM

Will cure your Rheumatism and al kinds of aches and pains-Neuralgia Cramps, Colic. Sprains. Bruises, Cute, Old Sores. Burns, etc Antiseptic Anodyne. Price 25c-Ady.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
The New Woman.

Mrs. Knicker-Are you going to take course in business college?
 Mrs. .Bocker-Yes; want to find out how to get more money out Of Jack.-Judge.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Wright's Indian Vegetable Pills put the stomach in good condition in a short time. Try them for Sick Stom- ach, Biliousness and Indigestion. Adv
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Already Converted.

No man can serve two masters observed the good parson. who was wis iting the penitentiary.
 "I know it." replied Convict 1913. I'm here for bigamy.''
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
WHENEVER YOU NEED
 A GENERAL TONIC TAKE GROVES
The Old Standard Groves Tasteless chill Tonic is Equally Valuable General Tonic because Acts on the Lver Drives Out Malaria, Enriches the Blood and Builds up
 the Whole System. For Grown People and Children

You
 
  and Taeles general debility Mothers and Pale sicky Children Removes Relieves depression and and Pnrhe the blood True Tonic and No family should be We
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Molten zinc instead of cement was used to bind together the stones in bridge recently built in France
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Time to Drop Him,

'I don't see you running around with that young oculist any more, Bella"
 No. My eyes are we'll now"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Literal.

What Is the most sunshiny system to live by you ever heard of?"
 T guess it is the solar system"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
The New Name.

What is an autocracy?" T guess it is a government by auto mobilists.'
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Dr. Peery's Vermifuge "Dead Shot" kills and e1pels Worms ip very few hours. Adv.
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19
Its Use.

After all, dust is great publicity promoter"
 How so?"
 Doesn't it keep the streets and pub lie highways in the eye of the peo- ple?"
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Most men are too polite to adhere strictly to the truth
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Some girls fall in love, and some others are pushed In by anxious mothers
The Forrest City times., 1913-09-19

Liquid blue is a weak solution Avoid it Buy Red Cross Ball Blue. the blue that 8 all blue. Ask your grocer. Adv.