El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1913-11-09

. there temprit zone sea was as ca m as
, d pie tin between bakln' days. For
/ weeks and weeks we didn't do nOthin'
/ but hang over the stern and watch
+ that seal, and the seal Just swum along
and sort of looked up at us with its
! big sad eyes an purity soon the vim
I min folks begun TO say Poor little
/ seaIi Amt It awful now il has to
swim an swim, an swim an swim, an
| sW-
IF any teller really went at it to stop
/ them Tango dances" said Sim Perkins,
SO we fetched the cooks hammock
an lowered it down an cOtched the seal
I an hauled it aboard said Uncle Ash
} dOd And that was a mistake, be-
! cause after it was aboard we couldn't
( watch it swim no more, ana there
/ wasn't nOthin TO do except to sit
around an say how rotten the trusts
sTh' way to stop them Tango dances
| is to stop 'em, said Sim Perllin
! angriiy-
I $50 somebody says, Let's have
/ dance So the chemist went down and
/ fetched up nunk OF wax what ne d
/ brought along TO soak into the ends Of
| the sticks of the no trust matches, and
! he waxed the deck fore an aft, an the
second mate fetched up player plan
ner, only ne didn't have no music rolls
to play, SO he played sixteen gross of
Antitrust pCrOS plaSters the sh- D s.
doctor had in his medicine chest. He
9
7 BET 1 could stop en- said Sim
Perkins anSrIly. Il bet no Tango Ganc-
/ ers could
'Twa'n't much of tune" said Uncle
, AshdOd, shaking his head NO sir,
/ twa'n't much OF a tune. 1t was right
plain that the feller that cut them holes
in them pOrus DlaSters want no mUsi-
cal teller. A musical Teller would have
cut 'em sort of hit and miss. but they
was cut regular. like rows OF corn in
a cOrnfield. Didn't rightly seem like
music to me at all. Sort OF ct mo-
l notonOUs alOngN toward the the ned
played fifteen gross Of them pOrus-"
7 wouldn't dance en-" said Sim Per
: kins vindictively- I wouldn't be seen
( dancin' a Tango"
And nobody knowed how to dance to
q tune like that" Uncle Ashdod con-
/ tinued placidly- There didn't seem TO
be no dance into it. Except the seal.
( The seal just riz up on the end of its
tail and wiSSled J'yfully. 1t wiSgled
and hoped. Yes, sir! That's what it
done It wasn't no dance, it was plain
wiSgle and hop. SO purity soon the
wife OF the man that used to keep the
moving picture snow at South RAILWAY.
Z New Jersey. she got up and she crossed
fIppers with the seal, and she wigElcd
and hoped. She wigEled and hoped
about seven gross of pcrUs plasters. she
did. N.Y. she says, when she sets
down That's the Erandest dance I've
had since TOwser was DupP So they
all had 20 try it. They took turns
dancin' with the seal and when thev'd
learned the step and the wiggle the5
. danced with each other. That was the
real start of the Tango dance"
I'D stopped en- If I'd a been cap
tain of that boat said Sim Perkins
But had rheuD7atiz in nv left Les"
said Uncle AshGod d" and I couldn't
canoe. ard the first mate he dIdn't
have no left leg ct all and he couldn't
dance an the second mate had cOrrS
on the palms Of his feet an he couldn't
% n n va Inn, oh
that couldn't dance. so after we'd
watched EN- dance as long as we
wanted to. we said that there dance
was a scandalOuS dance, and had 20
q desert island
.Heyr' said Sim Perkins, suddenly.
"What'd say?''
Wrecked the shipi" said Uncle
Ashdod calmly Couldn't stop the
Tango dancers no other way. 80
wrecked her Spoiled their dapcin
floor. anyway. And they made me king
of the Tango Island, because I made
EN- make me. And the second mate
was lord high chancellor. He was the
chance-seller Of ali the chances at the
fairs we had. And the first mate was
keeper of the seal. His dooty was to
keep the seal from dancin'. And the
first law / made was No Tango dancin'
allowed The folks come up in couples
to read the law and they went away
in couples. and they danced Tango
mad, sort O danced Tango on one
leg myself"
Il bet I could have said Sim
Perkins.
so I went and consulted the chem
ist," said Uncle AshdOd, because he
had tortoise rim spectacles and looked
like Noah, an when I got through he
just says. Safety matches"
What's that he says?" asked Sim
Perkins
Safety matches" said Uncle Ash
dod. His mind was on EN- so he
says 'em- He says Safety matchesP
'em from dom them wiggly dances
no other way I took his advice.
made the law that all clothes had to
be antiseptically treated by the chem
wiggly way might be catchin' dis
eases from one to the other. So the
chemist he treated all the females
dresses with the stuff they put on the
heads of safety matches, and he treated
all the mems clothes with the stuff
they put on the safety match boxes.
an then I said. Let 'em Tangol Let
'em wiggle an wiggler"
And they done it?' asked Sim Per
'.Yup!" said Uncle Ashdod. "They
danced Tango. Couldn't stop 'em. But
when two of EN- got dancin' an wig
glin together like as usual, it was like
a match dancin' with the side of a
match box. PiffI They'd strike a fire
just like a match. They couldn't seem
to understand it, catching fire that
way, but it stopped EN- dancin'
Tango"
I told you sol" said Sim Perkins,
triumphantily- 4 knowed they could
be stopped"
'sYupF' said Uncle Ashdod at
stopped 'em. 1t stopped 'em about a
week And then the little miIliner
that used to have the shop on the cor
ner next the drug store at South RAN
way brung out the Patent Antitrust
Sprinklin' Can Dancin' Hat Sprinkled
the fire out as fast as the dancin'
struck it up. So there wasn't but one
thing for me to do"
Put EN- all in jail" suggested Sim
Perkins.
why, nor said Uncle Ashdod. at
got the chemist to cure up my rheu-
matiz- I wish you could of seen me
an that seal do the Tango together,
while the second mate played that
good old tune called Ten More Gross of
of Parus Plasters, MOIherr Come in
side and III show you how we done it"
'Lemme seer said Sim Perkins.
thOughtfully. What was it they called
that instrument Apollo used to play
on? Yes 1 remember-tuneful Tyre.
Tunefql Tyre Yep, that was it
He watched Uncle Ashdod walk up
to the dance pavilion. Then he nodded