davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
MELISSA WOULD HAVE NO PEssi-
MIST AROUND THE HOUSE.

"f you have tears, prepare to, shed
them now" said Mrs. Merriwid, ad-
dressing her maternal maiden Aunt,
Jane. IF you have signs to heave,
heave to, my hearties!-just SO long
as they aren't too heavy and you
don't run any risk of straining your
SELF"
why should II" inquired Aunt
Jane, without taking her eyes from
the needle tbat she was threading.
ION geneia al principles, dearie," re-
piled Mrs. Merriwid. Its world of
sadness and sorrow where the four
flusher is exalted, as one might say
II one used slang, and where honest
merit gets 1t about half way around
between the front and back collar
buttons, to adopt metaphor. We are
decadent, degenerate, tainted, auntie.
The trail of the serpent is over It
all and the canker is at our hearts.
It's perfectly scandalous!"
Aunt Jane knotted her thread, and
then looked over her spectacles at
her niece, who had pumped her
comedy person upon the lounge and
was arranging the cushions to suit
her angle of reclamation.
THAT was Mr.. Megrim, wasn't it,
Melissa?" she asked.
1T was Mr.. Megrim, auntie, as you
surmise," replied Mrs. Merriwid. "Mr.
Megrim, all dolled up and looking too
sweet for anything. He would be a
handsome man If he didn't show so
much of his lower teeth, don't you
think? But when society is rotten
to the core and the spirit of greed
dominates the nation, it's hard for a
man Of any sensibility to keep his lip
from dropping. I'm afraid some time
he will step on 1t and have q seri-
Gus fall. 1t would naturally be seri-
Gus, II he had It,"
Aunt Jane made few stitches and
remarked that frivolity was not an
altogether commendable thing in her
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

discouraged. Two or three weeks
ago was pretty light-hearted, for a
lady in half mourning. The world
seemed to be good little old world.
after all, ira la. / thought I heard
quite few little birds warbling mer-
rily, and It seemed to me that the
sun shone brightly every once In a
while. Then, Mr.. Megrim came along,
and the band played the Dead March
from Saul. The sky became over
cast, gloom enveloped everything.
ravens croaked dismally and wet blan-
kets fell with a dull, soggy thud all
over the shop. l began to realize that
all was vanity and vexation Of spirit.
No. there isn't one single ray of hope
athwart the murky horizon, you tahe
1t from me, dearie."
did Mr.. Megrim have anything
particular to say, Melissa" asked
Aunt Jane, with apparent careless
ness.
HE might have had, but he DIDN'T
say It," replied Mrs. Merriwid. "He
forgot himself for few brief mo-
ments and began to talk of the Joys
of married life and the charm of con-
genial companionship. There was an
unmistakable CLEAN in his eye.
Forget it. Mr.. Megrim,' l said,
firmly, yet sorrowfully. "Consign 1t
to abysses of oblivion. You know as
well as / do what the divorce Stats
tics are. You know the brutality, the
stupidity, the inconsistency and de-
pravity Of man, and the vanity, levity,
fickleness, extravaganza and emo
tional folly OF woman, and how per-
fectly absurd it is to expect any
thing but misery as a result of their
housekeeping children, and you
know what children are nowadays
"'There are surely exceptions, Mrs.
Merriwid,' he said
81 said. My dear man, you must be
crazy to think so. Really, Mr.. Me-
grim, I'm concerned about you. I'll
tell you what you do. Trot along
home, or better still, go to some res
taurant and order a light repast of
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

opinion. She quoted Longfellow to
the effect that life was real and life
was earnest.
"And then some, dearie," said Mrs.
Merriwid. Its a vale Of tears and
a hollow mockery, and one-ahem!-
thing after another. That's Mr.. Me-
grim's idea Of 1t, and at that, life isn't
as bad az the people who are more
or less enjoying IL. 1t wasn't so abb
solutely awful before the fatal cpl
demic struck Virtue and Honor and
Decency and Justice and Truth and
carried them off, but now it's some
thing fierce. What's business? says
Mr.. Megrim. 4 pause for a reply.
Give 1t up? Robbery. That's what
It is. Cheating and robbing, extort-
ing all that the traffic will bear. What
do we find in politics? Do l hear any
reply? can answer in one word:
Graft. Demagoguery, ma'am. Men
dacity, ma'am. The politician of the
present day, from president to pound
master, is either a self-seeking ras-
cal or a mischievous, dangerous IA
natic. Have we any literature, any
art? We don't even understand the
meaning of the words. The publishers
are turning out tons of rot every
year and we read 1t because We are
incapable of properly appreciatiog
anything else. Sentimental rot, blood
and thunder rot, erotic rot; not
worth the paper It's printed on.
What's medicine? Humbug and quack.
cry. What's education? Faddism.
What are our preachers? Hypocrites
or sensation mongers. What are our
judges? Venal vampires, ma'am.' oh,
it's a cheerful outlook, dearie, be-
lieve me, If you take Mr.. Megrim's
word for It."
well, II seems to me there's a
good deal of truth In what he says,
remarked Aunt Jane.
And the worst of Il is the hope
lessness of conditions" said Mrs
Merriwid. THE rich are getting rich
er and the poor. poorer, and the cost
of living higher, every day, and
wouldn't wonder II the mean tenn
p-rature Of Tophet is steadily rising
TOO. ! declare, auntie, feel quite
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Touching the Cardinal.

At the Democratic convention In
Baltimore last summer two Of the SER
geants-at-arms were Ohioans, Col. John
Bolan of Toledo and Capt. Joseph
Bowling of Dayton. Bolan is the wit
who laid down the maxim that amy
man who parts his hair in the middle
is no Dimmycrat."
When Cardinal Gibbons had finish
ed the opening prayer, he descended
from the rostrum and made his way
toward the door. AS he neared the
exit where the two Ohioans were on
guard, Bolan whispered:
Joe, touch him whin he passes
ye."
"All right, colonel" replied Bowling,
with an inocent air. What pocket
has he got it UNPOPULAR Maya
zine.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Doing
Right
Makes
Success
In Life
by ALFRED FARLOW, Boston

once develop graces The old admonon do with your
might your hands find do might probably better read EDO well
do and should be noted that doing we'll does
necessarily doing big things 1t doing right in all
things great SMALL doing right every step of the Journey doing
right every experience Cultivate patience forbeance
courage all other characteristics Of the righteous
man, matter what your vocation may be.
refinement the ability to meet ones fellow with
proper address, the quality being kind and courteous the habit Of
mind and body be acquired anywhere and under
he who has acquired these the greatest degree
though may the humble walk Of @ has the largest
the most essential qualifications for the highest positions life
Furthermore he who improving his moral character and acqu
that immovabnes which tempered with genuine courtesy and
sweetness complain of lack Of advantage There is such
thing of opportunity TO live successful m all the
within the reach of each individual and be had
without money and without price.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Hard to Imagine.

A sense of the value of money comes
to some people sooner than to others,
and some people never know Its value,
but there is one little boy in suburb
of Boston that has a keen sense OF
it. He was discussing a piece of work
that he had done and telling his moth
er how much he had been paid for 1t.
Now, the boy is not yet ten years old,
and so the price paid for his labor was
small. To him 1t looked large. how
ever.
But a boy know got four dollars
a week for working" he told his moth
er. He worked for a long time, but
he got sick and died. Now, what do
you think Of fellow that'll die with
that salary ?''-Boston Traveller and
Evening Herald.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

cucumbers and milk and lobster sala&
and Swiss cheese and pie, and when
you've eaten It. you'll feel more like
your dear, dyspeptic SELF Well, he
got mad at that, and went"
Poor mani" said Aunt Jane, pity
ingly. II wonder IL he isn't rather in
judicious in the matter of diet"
well, 1 think he's careless" Mrs.
Merriwid answered. This is one
time, anyway, that he bit into Dead
Sea peach and got distinct flavor OF
lemon"
Copyright. 1912. - w. q. Chapman)
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Familiar to mike"

A negro clairvoyant who for some
time masqueraded as a Hindoo was
recently visited by collector. Mike
O'Conner.
"Ah," smiled the clairvoyant. "ze
genzelman wantz re palm read?"
NO." said Mike. "ze councilman ha3
re bill for you" !
When the bill was produced tie
palm reader forgot his Hindoo an
cestors and a stream of perfect Eng
lish swear words poured from his
lips.
"Ah," said Mike, smiling. re gen.
zelman sounds more like re Indiana
avenue zan re Hindoo. "-Indianapolis
News.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Being
Power
For Good
In Some
Way
BY SARA MCLEAN. Cincinnati. o.

proportional Bacon says in proportion watchu
and pverfuy against the of passion
and peudces which tending drive him out of the right
in The same degree for chcring humble hops
that no the Shirt of Truth will be with him enghten
understanding"
here greater monster in being than bad gea
parts" saws Such would like
side wide awake, alive and the other side insensae
Persons chief aim of their lives collect gae
mere knowledge of wealth attain their highest ambitions and the
NAV live in luxury, but they lost much.
No should allow his intellect interfere with his being
power for good in way other
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Man Made Of Horse shoes.

Some years ago Mr.. Douglas, the
village smith of Ellensburg, Wash, set
to work to construct giant figure Of
a man out of old horseshoes which he
accumulated In the course Of his work.
Up to date he has completed the legs,
which are composed of no fewer than
$4,000 shoes. Mr.. Douglas is begin
ming to wonder IL he will ever finish
the figure, as the coming of the motor
has an appreciable effect upon the
shoeing trade and materials for this
quaint colossus are not coming in so
fast as they used to do. The smiths
horseshoe man. even In its incom-
plete form, is one OF the sights OF the
town.-Wide World.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
Her Advice.

Reginald" says the beauteous OBJ
ject of his alteration, Il happened to
read in the paper that sugar has gone
away up in price, and for that reason
candy is more expensive. Just think
you are extravagant to keep bringing
me a pound every time you call"
II am glad to do 1t. darling" avows
Reginald.
IL know you are, but you must learn
to be economical Papa told mamma
to buy sugar by the barrel and get 1t
cheaper, so maybe you would better
buy candy for me the same way"
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
SG:A: M.nee

Briefly stated, a successful life is one
which is well advanced toward real man
hood-the likeness of God-"the full stat
ure of manhood in Christ" At some pc
riod in the life of each individual there
comes an awakening to the necessity of
Brightness, and hence an awakening to the
Importance of that ideal manhood which
accords with the divine requirement.
We believe that each one must work out
the problem of life from the particular po-
stion in which the necessity of so doing
first appears to him; that he must begin
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

knowledge unaccompanied by other
high qualities does not properly shape
ones life. Virtue and integrity are not
elusive. People who may have left them
far behind in their pursuit of other inter
ests can pick them up again, as the weaver
does the broken thread in his loom, and
they can go on weaving their life web,
making it one of beautiful usefulness and
worth
1t does not make any difference to
what extent one is educated if there is no
expansion of soul; the life cannot be well
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

An electric current of 100 volts has
food value of porterhouse steak
At that rate criminals who are electro
cuted may die with the sublime
knowledge that death is due to high
living
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Some Chicago girls have organized
a matrimony club with the basic prin.
ciple that a man must have $4,000 a
year to be even considered. Wonder
IL they've outlined any plan for round
ing up the $4,000 eligibles yet
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

London smart set is cultivating the
smile that won't come off. a three
cornered, creation with the aid of a
harness. Heroic methods to over
come the contention they they can't
see a joke.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

An English author declares that
Americans cannot understand the
English pronunciation OF words. In
that case the English actors ought to
brush up on pronunciation before they
come over.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A Milwaukee Judge refused to find u
couple guilty Of assault and battery
for striking a bore who insisted on
making an afterdinner speech. 9th.
er postprandial experts should profit
by his example.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Man, according to the editor of
Harper's Bazaar, contributes nothing
to the home but money. True! But
money is handy thing to have around
q home.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Cornell has a perfect woman in one
OF the co-eds. After her graduation
she will take up market gardening
thus continuing her perfection by
demonstrating her ability to support
a family,
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A case of criminal indigestion has
been brought to light in New York
where a deaf-muts was arrested for
eating a ninety-doliar diamond ring.
He is now suffering in consequence
from too rich a diet.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

An Illinois Judge, deciding whether
poker was pleasure or work, held II
depended on who was winning. The
conclusion being that it is pleasure
for one player to work another.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

German robbers are employing a
moving-picture machine to assist In
their work. Probably they sell the
film of the holdup after it is perpe-
trated.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Nature intended woman to be supe-
rior to man, says Viennese anthro-
pologist. who adds that nature carried
out her intention.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

An incubator used by George Wash.
ington is said to have just come to
light. What a fine thing to hatch
some OF the cold-storage eggs OF the
vintage OF '76.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A pretty young matron Of New Jer.
sey fractured an arm and two ribs
trying to kiss a youth of fourteen
years. Callow YOUTH
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A Pittsburgh woman says her hus
band has not given her a cent in
thirty-eight years. No wonder Pitts
burgh is full of millionaires.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Tea has been used as a beverage In
China for more than 1000 years Eng
land. though reputed a tea-drinking
nation, is quite outdlstanced.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Mr.. Edison plans moving pictures
that will talk, somebody having told
him that We do not have talk enough
already.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

New York fremen are to have roof
gardens on their stations. The devel-
opment of the movement TO use the
roofs grows more interesting every
day.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Can you brace yourself for a ter
rible shock? Pharaoh. says an Eng
lish professor. was only fat, old man
after ALL
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

In the fight against mosquitoes
Uncle Sam is going to use goats,
which will thus become useful as we'll
as ornamental.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Violet is the mourning color of Tur
key. Probably their hymn OF death
is Sweet Violets."
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Sending bricks through the mails
may yet come to have a certain sig
nifcance-for instance, in answer to
the letter OF dun.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Consider the ways of the eggs, we
are driven to the conclusion that this
is a hen-pecked country.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

New York artist has discovered
a living Mona Lisa. Still, many will
fail to see that as a compliment to
her beauty.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

If this country is too noisy how did
the lady ever manage to live through
all these years In it?
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

The German emperor has composed
the music for ballet. He ought to
stage It.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A Paris banker who lifted" $780,,
100000 again showed financial dexter
ity by jumping a $4,000 bail bond.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08
q. A LIsK. Publisher

The weather man may well be proud
OF himself
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

A Duluth man held off a pack OF
wolves with four cigars. Gift cigars
sometimes come in handy.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1913-02-08

Every married man should keep a
stock OF ready-made excuses on hand.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
Grand Encsmpment Of Maryland

Messrs. J. E. Finley, E. Earl
Hearn and Balm Brannock arrived
home this morning from Baltimore,
where they have been attending the
sessions of the Grand Encampment
of Maryland, which was in session
Monday and Tuesday. The retiring
Grand Patriarch, J. H. Boyd, was
presented with a beautiful Past
Grand Patriarch's jewel by Sharon
Encampment.
The following officers were cleo
ted and installed:
Grand Patriarch-John S. Green.
Grand High Priest-Elias b.
Hartle.
Grand Senior Warden-John H.
Pfeiffer.
Grand Scribe-Wm. A. Jones.
Grand Treasurer-John H. Sti-
vers.
Grand Junior Warden-George P.
Stein.
Grand Representative Fox
we'll.
Grand entative-Joseph E.
Cook.
Grand Marshal-John F. Mumma.
Grand Inside Sentinel-G. Lee
Burgess.
Grand Outside Sentinel-G. Wal
ter Brooks.
The following special committee
ON centennial was named: William
A. Jones, chairman; Col. George
w. Goldman, S. H. Foxwell, Fred A
! Groom and James Young.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
lie gets what he deserves, but it takes
Othello in Jonesville

An Edison comedy of some near
actors who try to break into the show
game for some easy money, but their
acting proves disastrous.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
Rrief2ocal Mem,
Auditorium tonight.

Auditorium tonight.
Miss Henrietta Marshall, of Wash
ington, is spending sometime in
Cambridge visiting friends.
Mr.. George Carroll Insley, of
I Lakesville, has purchased of H. H.
Wright, a Ford touring car.
Tonight, at the New Opera
House, "The Village Pest" and
Mistaken Intentions" Don't fail
to see them
See Bronclo Billy, with a bunch
of other COOL pictures, at the Au-
dtorium tonight. That big jungle
picture is con ing to the Auditori-
UNI soon.
There will be a Republican mass
meeting at the Grand Opera House
tomorrow evening. For a list of
the speakers, see the large adver-
Mrs. VIM. d. Smith, of Williams
burg, is spending short time in
Cambridge, as the guest of her
brother, Comptroller Emerson G..
Harrington, at his home on Mill St.
Mr.. J. Ernest Finley, representa-
tive of Cambridge Encampment,N No.
5, to the meeting of the Grand En-
campment of Maryland, which has
been in session in Baltimore this
week, returned home this morning.
The Democratic mass meeting to
be held tonight at the store of q.
Andrews & Son, on Choptank ave-
nue., will start promptly at 100
O'Clock. Addresses will be made
by Judge w. Laird Henry, T. Sangs-
ton Insley and P. Watson Webb.
The sessions of school at the
Seminary have been dispensed with
since yesterday noon, on account of
the trouble with the heating appa-
ratus. 1t appears to us that there
has been an oversight somewhere,
when the children attending a large
school like the Seminary are COM
PEELED to lose two and one-half days
because of the fact that no one
thought to have the heating appa-
ratus overhauled before cold wea-
Their began.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
Salem News

Mr.. and Mrs. j. H. Stapleforte
and Mr.. and Mrs. Herman Holland
returned Wednesday evening from
trip to Baltimore by automobile.
Mrs. M. T. R. Fooks has return
ed to her home in Cambridge, aft
er spending several days with her
daughter, Mrs. w. w. Turpin.
Mr.. and Mrs. Fred Gore and chill
dren spent Sunday with Mr.and Mrs
jos. Phillips.
Miss Louise, Gore spent the
weekend with her parents, Mr.and
Mrs. q. S. Gore. $3.50
Miss Oma Brohawn spent Sum
day with her parents, Mrand Mrs.
C. w. Brohawn.
Mr.. Clarence LeCompte, of Church
Greek, is spending a few days with
his parents, Mr.. and Mrs. S. o..
LeCompte.
DR.. Guy Steele visited Salem
school recently and vaccinated sew
eral of the pupils.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
Milk Notice.

Having purchased several mo- :
fresh cows, 1 am now prepared to
take on a few more customers for
milk. Remember the price, SC. per
quart. w. H. Merrick, !.
Adv. 23-3t. Phone 1S15-F1Z.
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23

Call at our store during our
demonstration and get a hot cup OF
coffee and biscuits, Oct. 81 to 3
S. E. Hubbard Hdw. Co. Adv. 23-6
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23

..Oil heaters, wood heaters and
coal stoves at Herbert Hearn's.-
Adv. b21-3t.-e.o.t. r22-2t. =
The daily banner. (Cambridge, Md.) 1897-2008, 1913-10-23
His Lordship, Billy Smoke

Billy is cowboy and wont stand for
his lordship. He makes . lord of him.
self, puts the right lord in wrong and
runs away with typewriter. A dandy
Western comedy made by the Vita
graph company.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1913-07-08
HOT FIGHT ON FOR
B.P. 0. ELKS' HEAD
Edward Leaoh's Supporters
Predict Victory Over Insur-
gent Candidate j. c. Boyd.

ROCHESTER,, N. Y, July 8.--With
contests for nearly every office, from
grand exalted ruler to grand trustee,
the first business session of the forty
ninth annual reunion of the Grand
Lodge, Benevolent Protective Order
of Elks. opened this morning. Elec-
ton of officers and the submission of
reports were the chief business of
the day.
Supporters of Edward Leach, of
New York. candidate of the regulars,
claimed a victory this morning, with
at least 1000 votes margin. They did
not concede more than 900 to j.
Goodman Boyd, of Baltimore, the in
surgent candidate.
1t was the intention of both fac
lions to conclude the election today
IL possible. A hot fight for grand
trustee is being waged between
Samuel V. Perrott, of Indianapolis,
and j. d. Jones. of Scranton, Pa,
and it may prove the closest contest
in the list.
Every train entering the city
brought more delegates today. The
program, outside of the business
session, included band concerts, a
ball game and a roastfest
Tonight an electrical and floral
parade of floats with fireworks will
be held.