davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21
Young Women Seek
Career In Cities
By Fannie M. Enrisht. Philadelphia

Career living amid surroundings with which they totally
miiar.
Then they have to suffer unpleasant For this
the social
depha has performed real service by issuing warning girls through
out the country not big cities unless they have been
honest employment at than So a week.
Country girls working farm frequently ud the city
because they think Sc 81 good Many regret their folly
The nterchuh federation found that the average weekly
living for working includes rent with meals lunches
clothing and ncidentals, $3.50.
The commission its statement says that many dangers
the esupporng who inadequate wage
pomnt for length of time that feel justified issuing this
ton and warning"
contemporary has discovered that the price of ratenake
has So to
along from end to the other without single dose of rattle
snake poison.
young gets lot of publicity for Beginning world
cents" Many begin less than that
newspapers, either.
European surgeon has succeeded in transferring the kidney
goat to the interior Of a Now who's the goat?
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21

1t Began With Adam.
Denouncing the government Is the
Oldest profession In the world.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21

"Pshawl" he replied; 'Tm not get,
ting old. l have never been referred
to as the Nestor or the dean of any-i
thing"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21
stu Young. Apparently.

Simeon" his wife protested,
please do be careful. Remember that
you are not as young as you used to-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21
Imporranf fo Raoflnap

Examine carefully every bottle of
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that 1t
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21

names of friends ~ a me- t,s,.tkA send US
- 'sSe AsasAn Remedy Co. BLACK ven no as 81
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21
Qualification.

why do you belong to the golf
club? l have never seen you play
Ing"
81 get SO much satisfaction out of
sitting around and watching the men
keeping the green's in order. once
had to work for a living myself"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21
Too Much knowledge.

81 do snot think people should get
married until they are thoroughly &C
Quainted with each other"
What would you do-abolish mat
rimony P"-Judge.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21

When a young Eskimo
has decided to become a
family man he marches up
to the hut of the young
woman of his choice and
lies in wait for her. When
she appears he seizes her by
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1913-03-21

European has succeeded in transferring the kidney
goat to the interior of a Now who's the goat?
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

into the very best part of the pIav
right at the end where the fellow IS
going to give the girl a good kiss and a
good squeeze, and the old man is so
happy to find that the young fellow is
all right and the funny man is funniar
than ever.
That wouldn't go I'm the old DAYS,
Nowadays they won't even let a feI.
low die in peace. The audience is IN
its feet slamming seats around and
rushing out for the lobster feed before
the hero breathes his last noble mes
sage.
In the old days they would have
slaughtered a man for that, Thov
used to take a death scene seriously.
Once ] knew an old doctor who
went to the thcater and there was a
woman on the stage who in the play
was supposed TO have taken poison. ana
they didn't know what to do for her.
The old doctor stood it as long as he
could and then Jumped up and yelled:
Here, you idiot. Give her coffee.'
The people used to take books more
seriously, too, in the old days.
"One man said he wouldn't read such
book as oliver Twist When ne
came to the place where Oliver was
caught again he was so mad at Dick
ems for letting Oliver get caught that
he threw the book out Of the window
and vowed he would never read the old
thing,
Nowadays the more misery a poor
creature is led through the more enjoy
able the story is supposed to be and the
greater the sales. But that sort OF stuff
oidnt get any of the old timers money
That shows how wise they were in
the old DAYS. What do we care about
art? Humbug, There wasn't musn
art in the old-fashioned hoedown. bur
there was real fun in it, just tn
same
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Do You Know

Now that there has been so much
discussion as to the rate at which doc
tors are to be paid for their services
under the insurance act it is interest
ing to read of the singular way in
which Welsh monarchs used to pay
their doctors. In the court OF the
Gwynedd kings the physician or sur
geon ranked twelfth in order of preced-
ence among the household officials, and
his fees were carefully defined. For
curing a flesh wound that was not dan
gerous, the doctor was allowed no
other perquisite than such of the gar
ments of the wounded person as were
stained with blood. But for curing any
Of what were called the three dan
gerous wounds he was granted a fee of
So and his maintenance during the cure,
besides the blood stained garments.
The schoolmaster of Toggenburg,
Switzerland. is the village bandmaster,
the organist a fireman, a matchmaker
and a farmer. And in his spare time,
no doubt, he does a bit Of teaching.
Surgery by wireless is the latest. A
laborer on Swan island, whose only
connection with the outside world is
by means Of wireless telegraphy, had
a foot crushed in an accident. There
were no medical books at hand. and
there was no one near who had any
surgical experience. ThereupOn the
wireless operator called up the surgeon
of the nearest ship, and got him to eX-
plain in detail how an amputatiOn
should be carried out.
Nothing seems to have been omitted
i'm the regulations for aerial travellers
adopted by the international congress
at Geneva. They even include rules
for the registration of births or deaths
during an aerial voyage.
A record has been created by a Hen
field fowl which, in eight and half
years, has laid 1,400 eggs. 1t leaves
the Matching to less distinguished hens.
Employing dogs for the purposes Of
drawing carts was abolished in London
in 1889, and throughout the United
Kingdom in 1854
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
CHILDREN HAVE THE
HARDEST COLDS

Rapidly growing children need
tonic to make reserve strength with
which to resist coughs and colds.
And for sensitive stomaChs Jacobs
Wine cod Liver Extract is best, as
it does not disturb the stomach
instead It stimulates digestion and
increases the appetite. All objec-
tionable oils and fats have been
eliminated and the medicinal prop
critics of the livers combined with
wild cherry extract. syrup Of hypo-
phosphites. aromatiCs and port
wine, giving a very pleasant tonic
and the most rapid in strengthen
ing and building up the system.
To prevent coughs, colds, brOn-
Chitis, grippe and pneumonia, it is
invaluable; delicate children and the
aged need il especially; and as re-
constructive after fevers and grippe
il brings back the strength faster
than anything else
Jacobs Wine Cod Liver Extract is
our own laboratory product and we
know it is superior 10 any similar
preparation. We guarantee it I'M
gualihedly II it does not benefit the
patient return empty bottle and We
Will refund your money Two sizes.
35c and 6Ic-at all Jacobs Stores.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
This Hon1esMdde Cough
Syrup UiH Surprise You
Stops Even WhOOpIng Cough
Quickly. A Family supply
at Small Cost.

Here is homemade remedy that
takes hold of a cough instantly, and will
usually cure the most stubborn case in
"a hours. This recipe makes a pint
enough for a whole family. You couldn't
buy as much or as good ready-made
cough syrup for $3.50.
Mix one pint of graduated sugar with
p pint of warm water, and stir 2
minutes. Put 21a ounces of Pinex fifty
cents WORTH in pint bottle, and add
the Sugar Syrup. This keeps perfectly
and has a pleasant taste-children like
it. Braces up the appetite and is slightly
laxative, which helps end cough.
You probably know the medical value
of, pine in treating asthma, bronchitis
and other throat troubles, sore lungs,
etc. There is nothing better. Pinex is
the most valuable concentrated compound
of Norway white pine extract, rich in
guaiacOl and all the natural healing pine
elements. Other preparations will not
work in this formula.
The prompt results from this inexpen.
sive remedy have made friends for it in
thousands of homes in the United States
and Canada. which explains why the
plan has been initiated often, but never
successfully.
A guaranty of absolute satisfaction, OF
money promptly refunded goes with this
recipe. Your druggist has Pinex, or will
get it for YOU. IF not, send to The
Pinex Co., TT. Wayne, Ind.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Her FaYorite.

The other Sunday evening. when
church service was over, young min
lister started on his journey home. ac-
companied by two young ladies' of the
choir, when they began a conservation
about hymns.
What is your favorite hymn" asked
The curate, turning to one of his fair
companions.
Draw me nearer she replied, not
thinking Of the double meaning.
At that moment her companion, who
was walking on the other side of the
curate, to make matters worse, said, in
nocentlv:
That is only the chorus; the COM
mencement of the verse is, I am
thine"
At this the curate laughed heartily,
and the ladies are always very careful
now when talking about hymns.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Daysey Mayme
and Her Folks
Nv FRANCES L. GARsIDE.

THE claim made by a professor in
Columbia college that the rod
should be restored to its place of
boror in the public schools has caused
me friends of prattling babes to organ
ne 4 society called The Society of the
Anti Spanks." with Mrs Lysander John
Appleton for president.
This" she said. at the initial meet
ing lis not my first expression against
-be use of the rod. Several years ago,
when A Peace Commission meeting at
The Hague voted in favor of universal
disarmament, l promptly obeyed by
rsEing down the switch that hung be-
hind the kitchen door"
There were speeches by many women
calling on mothers to arise and stand
between their innocent babes and the
peach tree limb; there were addresses
that caused women to weep as if at a
matinee or a funeral
At last a man arose. Concealed by
the forest of feathers on the hats in
front of him, Mrs. Appleton did not
nsrceive it was her husband until the
mischief was done.
Asa prelude he gave a nervous cough
behind his hand.
The trouble he said, with that col
lege professor is that he does not go
back far enough. When a man enters a
home these days he is given over to the
children 10 play with. They climb over
him. they shoot him with their toy
guns. they hit him with their bats. and
smear raspberry jam in his whiskers.
The man has heard all his life that All
Good Men Love Children, and so pre-
tends that he likes to have molasses
candy put down his collar and his bald
spot made a repository for chewing
gum If he talks he has to scream to
he heard above the dear little children's
prattle and if as much as a CLEAN Of
resentment shows in his eyes when one
Of these Dear Little Ones uses his
watch for a hammer, its parents hate
him forevermore.
That professor did not go back far
enough. He should have advocated
the whip for some of you fool moth
ers-" but Lysander John was heard no
more!
Take tip from Father" whispered
Lysander John, through his bandages
and his poultices to his son, that night,
and never tell the truth to a woman"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
RESINOL CURED
AWFUL PIMPEES
Whole Face Covered. Now Clear

Whole Face Covered. Now Clear.
Brooklyn, y y. Oct. Q. 1912-"T was
troubled with two or three pimples
coming out on my chin. In a week or
50 my whole face was covered with
them. Friends advised me to use diff
fercnt lotions and salves. ! tried them.
but they did me little good, if any. l
finally washed the pimples with Resi-
mol Soap and applied Resinol ONT
ment before going to bed. In the morn
ing l found the swelling going down,
and the Inflammation gone from the
pimples. l tried this treatment for
about a week, and found that most of
the pimples had disappeared. I kept
the treatment Up for about a month
and then my face was clear of all
pimples. ! have used Resinol Soap
since, and find that the pimples do not
come back (Signed) Walter 4. Stem
strum. "a Willoughby avenue
Nothing we can say of Resinol equals
what others, such as Mr. Stenstrum
say of it, If you are suffering from
itching. burning skin troubles. pim-
pies. blackheads dandruH. chapped
face ana hands. ulcers, bOils. stub
born sores, or piles, it will cost YOU
nothing y try Resinol Ointment ana
Resinol Soap lust send 10 Dept. l5-T.
Resinol Baltimore. Md. for a free sam
pie of each. Every druggist sells Resi-
mol
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
% He Had to Quit Smoking 81

"One word led to another. and the
new word led to trouble. The Podders
went to bed that night with a visible
GOODNESS between them. Mrs. Fodder
had faced her husband with the die
tum: You've just got to be more care
full. l can't go around and watch you
all the time Fodder had answered not
at all.
He'd Have to Quit.
Next morning Fodder went to his
office without his regular good bye kiss
and Mrs. Fodder went about her house
hold duties with a face that wore the
semblance of thunder cloud. But
along in the morning her frown relaxed
into smile, and ii was with a bright
and shining countenanCe that she
dressed and caught a car for down
town.
Meanwhile Fodder in his office had
been fighting a battle with himself and
had been winning it,
AT last he rose, went around to the
desks of his fellow clerks and declared
himself. He wanted to burn his bridges
behind him, and he did. His fellow
clerks were more or less skeptical, but
he did not care
He meant to show them.
That evening Fodder entered the
trOnt door or his home breeZlly and
greeted his wife with a shout and a
smile, even as Mrs. Fodder was throw
ing her shapely arms around his neck.
And you'll never guess what ] got
downtown for YOU today cooed Mrs.
Fodder. It's going to be for your birth
day, even if it is a little bit early. be-
cause 1t was so expensive. It's a new
pipe, with a cap so that the old Goals
can't fall out and make trouble
Fodder sighed and seemed not too
happy.
Fodder, her mouth beginning to trem-
bic. What's the matter?
Nothing worth mentioning. re-
sponded Fodder without any signs Of
intense JOY, only I told them all at the
office today that | had quit smoking
And I'll have to keep my word, because
they said | couldn't"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
How He Was Cured of His
Contempt of the Law

but to ME it is a sad duty. I have to
pronounce Judgment on a man whom
honor and respect for an offense which
is absolutely against his nature and
character. You. the most peace-lOving
and kindest man 1 have ever met, as
saulted an innocent man in the street
without the slightest provocation. The
testimony showed that you were abso-
Iutely sober Then you broke several
windows, also while perfectly sober.
and now you openly, in the middle of
the day break every window pane In
the court house in the most cool and
systematic manner.
Finding that this is your fourth Of
Tense l really ought to sentence you to
hard labor, but I can not do this as long
as am in doubt as to the state of your
mind. II Jocks to me like intermittent
insanity. and az a friend, / beg you to
give me an explanation If you have
one"
Signor Capano to tell the truth. didi
not look the least bit repentant while
his friend. the Judge, addressed him, but
rather seemed to enjoy the whole mat
ter immensely. The last words evil
IDENTIFY impressed him, however. and hs
took his friends hand and said:
Il feel | must tell you that there is a.
reason for my apparently insane esca
pades and breaches of the law, which r
DO not care to explain in open court
You know my wife, Angelina. The
name suits her to perfection. for she ia
really an angel She is not quite well,
however, and when her health began to.
fail | could not make her see a special y
list
Her sickness takes the form that
occasionally she is subject to an attack
of bad temper, and for about a week she
is perfect shrew II is simply impos-
sible to live with her while the attacl1'
lasts. Several yeBrG experience ha -
taught me that her attacks are always
preceded by certain symptoms which
warn me Of what Is coming.
His Jail Sentence.
From my childhood I have always
loved my native town and hated travel
ing, so never could make up my mind
to leave San Severino I'd rather spend
a week In jail here than stop the same
length of time in the finest hotel In Ma
pies.
Nov. this is the true reason why (.
do something to get into prison once a
year. and I now beg you TO do your
duty"
The Judge smiled
And when do you expect your wifes
attack to begin? 1t is about a week
since you broke our windows, you
know"
Il feel ii will come tonight"
Then please follow me into the court
ROOM"
When the procedure was over the
judge said:
Knowing as do that Signor Capa-
nos domestic affairs are such that his
offenses will not cease if I simply SEN
tenCe him to jail, l herewith sentence
said Signor Capano to eight days ar
rest in quarters. that is to say. begin
ming with tonight, followed by eight
days in the common Jail"
Trapped" said Capano, as he EN-
erged from his prison cell two weeks
later and shook hands with the judge.
You have cured me-" he went on, and
/ have made. up my mind that one
whole years happiness is not too dearly
bought with one weeks troubles"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Up-to-Date Jokes
Of the Editor.

Nervous Lady Passenger Gin the
train after passing a temporary bridge)
Thank goodness, we are now on terra
firma!
Funny Man-Yos, ma'am-less terror
and more firmer.
Family Physician am afraid you
have been eating too much cake and
sweetstuff. Let me see your tongue
Little Girl-Oh, you can look at 1t,
but il won't tell.
First Traveler-W is that pompous
fellow strutting about so absurdly?
Second Traveer-He found some
ham in his railway sandwich.
Wicklow does my new spring hat
look. Tom?
Hub-Um! 1t looks to me like two
weeks salary.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

Elizabeth" wEites kindly publish
again the prescription for stomach dis
orders and constipation. | have mis-
placed the letter giving the ingredi-
ents.'
Answer: Go to your druggist and ask
for tablets triopeptine and take ac-
cording to directions, and you will soon
be entirely cured of all stomach trou-
bic and constipation. This is the best
treatment known for all kinds of stom-
ach trouble.
Anna says: Il am nervous, hys-
terical and very thin due to overwork.
What can | take to regain my original
vitality"
Answer: You will gradually regain
your original strength by using syrup
of hypOphosphites comp ozs: tine
ture cadomene comp. ! OF. Mix and
take teaspounful before meals This
is the best system tonic that / know Of
Mrs =. K. asks. Il am troubled with
large go,tre. and am very feshy: 50
much so that | am uncomfortable What
do you advise me to do
Answer: Five grain arbolene tablets
should be taken regularly. If this is
done your gOitTe and abnormal fat will
gradually be reduced. These tablets are
sold in sealed tubes, with full direc-
tons for home use
recommend remedy for kidney and
liver trouble. | have dark spots before
my eyes. dizzy spells and also twinges
of rheumatism.
Answer: have received many let
ters from people who have used the
following remedy and been cured of all
trouble such as you mention. Get
three grain sulpherb tablets mot sui
phur tablets). and take according to d.
rectiOnS given. They are sold at any
well stocked drug store and are thor
oughly reliable.
Louise Get the following prescrip-
ton filed and give 10 to IS drops in
water before meals to cure your little
boy of bedwetting. Comp. fluid balm
wort, ] o.; tincture rhusaromatic, 2
drains and tincture cubebs, l dram.
This should be given one hour before
meals.
Helen writes: MY nostriIs and
throat are badly affected with Catarrh
and my breath is very offensive I also
suffer great deal with headache and
pain IN my eyes Can anything be done
to help me-
Answer: Antiseptic Nilane powder
has been prescribed with great success
and the number Of letters received daily
from the hundreds Of grateful people
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

a little town Of San aDc coverno - The ,iis
government provided no official
residence. and the apothecary of the
town, who was the only man who had
any apartments to let, had an old
grudge against all representatives Of
the law.
In this dilemma Signor Capano. 10
the surprise of everybody, came to the
| assistance of the young judge and gave
| him possession of the top floor in his
| splendid villa. thus winning the instant
gratitude of the judge
They soon became fast friends
spending all their evenings together
smoking, drinking Chant wine and
talking politics until after midnight.
A year had passed when a case came
before the judge which embarrassed
him painfully. His dear friend and
landlord was accused of serious Of
Tense, punishable bye at least eight
days Imprisonment. and his hope that
the accused might prove himself inno-
cent failed. for Signor Capano did not
appear in court at all The case went
on, Signor Capano was convicted and
he himself asked to be permitted to
serve his sentence Immediately.
Contempt for the Law.
The Judge was seriously annoyed, as
he felt sure this conviction would put
an end to their friendship but his sup
position proved to be wrong, for, having
served his week in prison, Signor Ca
pano came up to the judges apart
ments as jolly and jovial as ever, and
never said word about what had hap
pened.
The judge learned to like Capano
even more than before. He was
splendid fellow and an ideal friend
But he did not like his evident con-
tempt for the law, so decided TO fad
! out the reason Of his peculiar ideas.
This was not very difficult. The old
est juryman, who had lived in San Sew
erlnO all his life. told him as soon is he
asked him about it.
Why? 1t does not surprise anybody
here he said we are quite used to
seeing Signor Capano go to Jail for
week every year but a for the reason
Of this strange habit you must ask
somebody else. If Signor Capano were
eccentric in any way, this might eX-
plain it, out he IS the most level-head-
ed and practical man l know"
The surprised judge examined the
records of the court and found that the
story was true. If he continued like
! this, however, his reputation would be
ruined. so the judge decided to find the
cause and. if possible, cure his friend
of his foolshness
SignOr Capano was once more
| charged with an offense worse than
! any Of his previous ones. The judge
was seriously annoyed and wondered IL
! his landlord were not the victim Of
intermittent attacks of insanity. This
time he resolved to help him, no matt II
what it would cost
A Psychological Riddle.
He sent for him an hour before the
court was set, pretending that he had
something Of importance to talk with
him about. Signor Capano came and
his friends eyes rested searChingly on
his face.
| You are psychological riddle" the
| judge said. This business may have
! been easy enough to my predecessors,
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Security.

a crossing sweeper was trying to get
gratuity from an exceedingly dandi-
fed Individual, who, in refusing, urged
mat he had no change-nothing but a
fve-p pound note.
u can get it changed for you, sir"
said the youngster.
On seeing the dandy hesitate. as if
Tom fear Of trusting him with the
money, he added
II you doubt my honesty, hold my
Mr-sn y