davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
A Wise GrandchiId.

The power to see quickly and to
seize every opportunity and advan-
tage, large and small alike, is the quail
tty that above all others insures sue
cess.
Mr.. Carnegie tells about a little
Scotch boy who had this quality Of
astuteness very highly developed. The
boys grandmother was packing lunch
for him to take to school one morn
Ing. Suddenly looking up in the old
lady's face. he said, "Grandmither
does yer specs magnifyT
"a little. my child" she answered
"Aweel then" said the boy, 81 wad
just like it if We wad take them off
when packin' my lunch" - London
Telegraph.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
The Old School at It's Best

1t was in the early days of the rail.
road. and Aunt Ruth had boarded the
train for her first trip. Her maid had
neatly arranged her carpet bag. band
box and reticule around her, but there
was some trouble with the engine. SO
that the train did not start at once.
Aunt Ruth had spread out her ample
skirts like an open fan. and her little
feet were daintily perched upon a foot
stool. Just then the conductor passed
through. Touching him lightly upon
the arm. she said. "You may tell them
I am seated and am ready to go now."
-Woman's Home Companion.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Biggest Thing In the World.

"'Fighting Bob Evans" said a naval
veteran of Washington. "had, like most
fighters. a tender heart
Fighting Bob had specially ten
der heart toward children. l once
heard him say as he held his little
grandchild's hand:
"A child is the biggest thing in the
world. A ragged. emaciated hungry
child is to me bigger than a battle
Ship '"-Exchange.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Not Yet.

One Of the stories around town con-
Germs man who caught a heavy cold
during the changeable weather and
concluded to take a spell in bed. His
wife came into the room and said:
"Jim. there's a visitor for you"
"Oh. shucks." Jim growled "I'm
too sick to see anybody"
But it's our pastor"
Thunder. | amt sick enough to see
him."-Newark Star.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
BY nj. QUAD.

BY nj. QUAD.
copyright. 1913. by Associated Literary
Press.l
~AKE it for any ache that ever
u Take it for any pain that
ever panied.
If you are on your dying bed and are
able to talk in whisper, demand that
they get you a bottle of Pilgrim Joe's
alleviator.
Can be applied externally with a
woolen rag or taken internally with
safety. Don't take the rag with It,
No politics or religion mixed with it.
1t cures the sinner as we'll as the saint.
Hits the case of gambler as well as
that of the church deacon.
Statements have been made by envi-
Gus rivals In business that call for
prompt denial. My Pilgrim Joe's al
leviator is not made by trust. am
the original and sole inventor and am
putting it out from humanitarian mo-
tives. II can make 80 per cent and
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Domestic Rapartae.

"You will remember" said she
haughtily. that you proposed to me
four times before consented to marry
you. You wouldn't take no for an
answer"
II remember" he replied sadly. ut
seems to me that every time you have
changed your mind I've got the worst
Of ."-Exchange.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
A Mean Retort.

Wife-According to this paper. hot
water will prevent wrinkles. Huband
so? Then how do you account for
the numerous wrinkles | have? Wife
How do l account for them? Husband
Yes; you keep me in hot water near
ly all the time. you know.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25

7 WAS PRESENT IN THE FRONT RANKS"
keep my humanitarian motives to the
front at the same time l shall ask for
no greater reward
My alleviator contains no breakfast
foods.
1t has nothing to do with life in
surance.
There is no rebate attached to it.
There is no yellow dog" behind.
l have no United States senators In
my pay.
have never bribed members of the
legislature to make it go.
From digging the roots to waxing
the cork. there is no Doodle attached
to it.
I offer $1,000 in gold for every drop
OF alcohol found in my alleviator
1t contains nothing to make the old
drunkard worse. 1t contains nothing
to start the child on a career of vice.
My enemies point to the fact that 1t
failed to alleviate a man in Connecti-
cut who was blown up by a powder
magazine. Nothing but his left ear
was found but do not pretend to al
leviate fragments.
There are forty-eight doses in every
bottle, and the empty bottle makes a
beautiful yard ornament at a seaside
resort.
Booming the AIleviator.
The price is the same the year
around. 1t cures frostbites in winter
and dog bites in summer After lick
ing the blade of an ak on a frosty win
ter morning nothing will soothe your
injured feelings like an alleviator.
The bottle is so thick that the chill
dren can play horse with it. In the
west it is favorite missile for farm
ers to throw at hogs. No matter what
other so called alleviators appear in
market, do not be deceived. Ask for
the old and time tried and take ne
other.
After three months from date all
bottles will be made earthquake proof.
Quakes may come by day or by night
and with what force they will, but the
bottle of alleviator sitting on the par
lor table will remain undisturbed and
be an asset to begin business anew.
At the Galveston flood one of my bot
ties foated across to the West Indies
and cured four patients when opened.
At the San Francisco fire one was
warped to the shape of the letter "S''
and still preserved it's contents.
Ascertain that your family druggist
Is not horse thief before asking him
II he sells Pilgrim Joe's alleviator.
was making for the town of Busted
Ben one day last week, feeling in my
usual good spirits and wondering why
all men could not figger out that integ-
fity paid 80 per cent profit and no
afterclap. when 7 meets up with an old
kuss on foot who seemed to be made of
smiles and blandness. We stopped to
pass the time of day. and by and by he
said:
Pilgrim, it warns the cookies of my
heart to meet thee. have just bought
a site for an orphan asylum. and |
wouldst have your opinion on the same
Come with me and view the spot
where the fatherless will gambol for
the day and sleep by the night. Later
on, If thee sees fit. thou may contribute
10 the grand charity"
AS founding orphan asylums has al
ways been right in my line, | turned
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Cut Down.

well. my boy" said the visitor to
Bobby. 81 suppose some day you ex-
pect to step into your fathers shoes?'
"Oh. l suppose so." said Bobby
gloomily. "I've been wearin' out every
thing else he wears since mother has
learned to cut 'em down for me."-
Harper's Weekly.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
His Occupation.

Farmer Hornbeak - What's your
nephew that graduated from college Il
spell ago doin' now? Farmer Bentover
Still colorin' a meerschaum pipe
Judge.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Anaesthetics.

1The anaesthetics don't seem to
have any effect on old Battersby, sir.
He won't drop off,"
"Hum! Ah. have 1t! Send for his
pastor and his barber. Between them
they ought to put him to Sleep
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Defined.

French Teacher-Now. Tommy, what
French Teacher-Good, and what gen
der is it? Tommy-Feminine; money
talks.-Satire.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
Not FULLY Iestad.

What ar absurd little watchr
"1t keeps very good time"
AAh, 1t may do now. but wait tin
the longer days come" London
Punch.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25

Nations. like individuals, live or die,
but civilization cannot perish.-Maz-
gini.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25

Truth Is our only armor In all pas.
sages of life Or death. Emerson.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25
PILGRIM JOE.
He and His Allevi3tor Keep on
Doing Business.
INTEGRITY TRIUMPHS AGAIN.

And Certain Bland and Smiling Gen.
tlenan Is Relieved of $4o-An Ad-
venture With Grass Widow and 9
Safe Get Away.
Bridgeton pioneer., 1913-12-25

Franco Belgian line, and the fugitives
resolved to make it, getting a lift from
some conveyance going the same way
when possible. They walked more
than half the distance and crossed the
line at an unfrequented point, exhaust
ed, but greatly relieved. The moment
they were assured that they were on
Belgian territory both knelt and gave
thanks for their safety.
"And now," said the marquis, Il re-
new the offer l made in Paris, not as
an offer, but as prayer-that l may
devote the life which belongs to you
to your service"
81 am one of the people" replled the
girl. "You are noble
"My nobility is gone. shall never
claim it. | shall go to America, to New
Orleans, where so many of my friends
have gone. leaving my title behind me
Come with me, beseech you, that
may repay what owe you Win NE
time of love and gratitude"
There is a house still standing al
Carrolton. a short distance above New
Orleans. where lived the marquis ana
his wife, though not as mobiles When
Touis XVIII. was restored to the
throne of France he invited them 10 re-
turn. but neither the husband nor the
wife had any desire to do so lheT
died in the Crescent City beloved anu
respected by all who knew them ana
leaving large number of children ana
grandchildren The MARQUIS Eep. Ills
word as to his title and never useu IT,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
TRIBULATIONS OF TIM
Copyright, 1913. by W. werner.)

In the face. but gr!nning, looked up he
1ouho no one on whom to lay the odium
OF OFFENDING the majesty of the law
Sklmp had vanished to receive the ad-
miring plaudits of his cronies
! After that incident Tins life began to
De miserable from the moment he entered
n Eyer street. he was new to the work
Aitnough ne had always wanted the lob
now that he had it he began to wonder
! II he could fill the bill; and such n
thought isn't good for a mans peace Of
mind when he has just been married and
mas little home about twenty-five min
utes out. He knew he would be Cred,
II certain things were reported to his SUI
.periors..
Tins dignity suffered. too, at some O.,
the onenses perretrated upon him Be
hind these he began to see a guiding
hand. and he soon discovered it was the
little black-eyed "Skimp" For him Tim
lay in wait.
After falling over a rope stretched
tightly across the sidewalk and hearing
the daughter OF those who saw him. his
slow Ire was aroused. He had gone on,
and had come stealthily back This time
no warning was passed along. and he
caught Skimp by the collar But that
elusive younsster slid out of his coat and
vanished, leaving Tim holding the empty
garment Even Tim had to grin at that.
'Skimp was having royal good
time His drowsy. beer-drinking father
paid no attention to him: his mother al
WAYS weary with her work. had long
ago given up the training Of her mis-
chievous son. The only other member
OF the family. babe" Schmidt, had long
ago won "Skimp's" affection She was
the idol he worshiped and the listener
to whom he told his exploits
She was little. but wise as the RJver
street children are wise. and one day.
when they had a particularly good
stunt they thought would get s.Tim,s
goat" "Skimp arranged matters SO that
"Babe" could see the fun
But the little girl was not to see the
fun. "Skimp'' placed her among some
friends, but they. as Tim drew near
lost their courage and tried to run
across the street. The little one trim
ping after them, fell and a big truck
horse, frightened by the flying figures.
trampled upon her.
Through the maze flashed Tins blue
figure. With little crumpled form in
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

this record Tins own stood out darkly.
So that Tim was startled one night
when he felt his arm pulled and looked
down into "Skimp's" frightened face and
heard boyish voice say: Tim, keep
your blinks open. I heard two fellows
back O. Myers saloon sayin they wuz
goin ter clean up place ternight. It's
been waitin' fer We to come back. The
OF man wouldn't let me out. an I had
to wait till the OF guy gotta sleep, then
| beat 1t. It's down there somewhere. -
He pointed down the dusky, quiet street.
AS they looked the big city clock struck
the hour Of 2. Tim thrilled as if it had
been warming He patted "Skimp' on
the head. You're a square kid, 'Skimp.' "
he said. I'm much obliged fer the hint.
I'll land EN-
IF can help youse, Tim" "Skimp'' be-
gan. a little thrill in his voice.
Tim paused. Say, kid. you slip down
the street. close to the buildings. They've
fggered on me comm, see? An If you
I'm on, Tim; Ill do it." was the an
swer. -
Into the shadow the small figure van
ished.
THAT boy.n make plain clothes man
some day. Tim muttered.
Ten minutes passed before "Skimp"
came back. When he did he was
trembling. I've got 'em; it's 'Dutchy's'
store, he whispered.
WITHOUT a word Tim started down a
side alley. He worked around until he
reached the place.
The confederate on the other side
signaled. but he was too late. Opening
the door Tim grappled with man who
darted from back of the counter. Back
and forth in the small store they wrestled.
Tim knew he was strong, but he was
startled to feel the steel-like strength
of the man he had grabbed in the dark
ness Tim was inspired by his hope of
making good, and of not being forced to
give up in dishonor the position he had
won.
Tins first impulse to cry for aid was
checked Suddenly the other turned and
secured a knife. With quick turn Tim
caught the mans hand and wrenched 1t
out, but at the same time he broke his
guard and was caught in a grip that
made him shudder. 1t was an armlock
hold which would break his neck. Slowly
Tins neck went backward and around.
He moaned in agony.
The door opened and a small figure slip
ped in. Over its head 1t swung something
that crashed down with smashing force
on the head above Tim Then, shadowy
still, the figure slid out.
The grip that had been twisting Tins
neck weakened sharply, the form slid
down like dead mans. and the officer
sat up.
..skimp' had come to his rescue.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
NEW PARCEL POST STAMPS.
Will Be Regulation in Size and Bear
Large Numerals.

A design for a new parcel post stamp
has been adopted by Postmaster General
Burleson to take the place of the spe-
cial series now used. This change was
deemed advisable, it is said, because of
numerous complaints received from the
public and the ,postmasters against the
designs now in use. The denominations
of the present series are not readily de-
termined. being printed in the same shade
of red as the stamps. Another feature
that has made the change necessary, it
is said, is that the value of the stamp
can be raised with but little difficulty.
The new design which has been ap-
proved by Postmaster General Burleson
is the same in size as the ordinary stamp
now in use, and will bear large numeral
for the denomination. Although the new
design may not possess the artistic merit
of the present series of parcel post stamps.
1t is said. it will be of greater practical
use and at the same time the government
win be enabled to save approximately
$50, coo in manufacture. 1t is expected to
have the new stamps ready for general
distribution within the next three months.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
Little Stories for Bedtime.
Johnny Chuck Finds Out Who the Singers Are.
By Thornton w. Burgess.

Johnny Chuck couldn't keep away from,
the Smiling Pool. No, sir. Johnny Chuck
couldn't keep away from the Smiling
Pool. Ever since he and Peter Rabbit
had gone over there looking for the sing
ers who every night and part of the day
told all who would listen how glad they
were that Mistress Spring had come to
the Green Meadows and the Green For
est Johnny Chuck had something on his
mind. And this is why he couldn't keep
away from the Smiling Pool.
You see it was this way: Johnny and
Peter had thought that of course the
sweet singers We're birds. They hadn't
dreamed of anything else. So of course,
they went looking for birds. When they
reached the Smiling Pool the voices came
right out of the water. Yes, sir, there
wasn't the least bit of doubt about that.
the voices came right out of the w..ser.
And because he was thinking of birds all
the time and was looking for birds
Johnny Chuck had spoken his thoughts
right out and had exclaimed: How can
birds stay under water SO long,: and he
couldn't understand why Jerry Musllrat
laughed fit to kill himself. You see.
of the cousins of Mrs. Quack. can stay
under water long time, and so he didn't
know but that some other birds might.
Jerry Muskrat was always watching for
Johnny when he came to the Smiling
Pool. and his eyes would twinkle as he
would gravely say:
Hello, Johnny Chuck. Have you seen
the birds sing under water YETI"
Johnny would smile good naturally and
reply: Not yet, Jerry Muskrat Won't
you point them out to me?"
: Then Jerry would reply:
Two eyes you have as bright as can be.
Perhaps some day you'll learn to see.
Then Johnny Chuck would sit as still as
ever he knew how and watch and watch
the Smiling Poole. But not a bird did he
see in the water. though still the sing
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
MARKET DIVISION PLANNED
Department of Agriculture Officials
Preparing for It's Inauguration.

Plans for the organization of the divi-
sion of markets, which, under the Secre-
tary of Agriculture, is to try to discover
of food products, are being made by a
joint committee of chiefs of various
divisions in the Department of Agricul-
ture.
Within the next few weeks the division,
for which Congress provided $4,000. will
be able to begin its investigation. Several
officials today expressed the opinion that
the information which they will be able
later to disseminate will prevent much
duplication of cost of getting food from
the producer TO the consumer.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

ers were there. One day a sudden thought
popped into his head. Perhaps these sing
ers We're not birds at all! Why hadn't he
thought of that before? Perhaps it was
because he was looking so hard for birds
that he hadn't seen anything else. Johnny
began to look, not for anything particu-
lar. but to see everything that he could
see.
Almost right away he saw some tiny
little dark spots on the water. They
didn't look like much of anything.
They were so small that he hadn't no.
ticed them before. One of them was
quite close TO him. and as Johnny Chuck
looked at ii it began to look like a tiny
nose, and then-why just then johnny
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

disappeared Johnny Chuck caught just a
glimpse Of little form under the water
"Why-why-e-e, The singers are
Grandfather Frogs grandchildren cried
Johnny Chuck
NO, they're not, but they are own
cousins to them; they are the yrandchil-
dren of old Mr.. Tree Toad and they are
called Hylas"' said Jerry Muskrat.
laughing and rubbing his hands in great
glee. Il told you that if you Used your
eyes you'd learn to see'
My. but they've got voices bigger than
they are said Johnny Chuck as he
started home across the Green Meadows
m glad. j know who the singers OF
the smiling Pool are, and / mustn't for
get their names-HyIas, What a funny
namer'
But Farmer Browns boy, listening to
their song that evening, didn't call them
Hylas He said: Hear the peppers!
Spring is surely here
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
| his arms he dashed to a box and sent in
j the call for anahl.lan

his arms he dashed to box and sent in
the call for an ambulance
Skimp." scared to death, and remem-
bering his fathers orders that Babe
was not to be taken out, hurried home
because there was nothing else to do.
. He was in the corner, shriveled up in
the effort to take up as small a space az
possible, when there came a knock or
the door, and in came Tim.
"Skimp' for once was ready to faint
but the big policeman simply winked al
him and went on to explain to Schmidt
how the accident had occurred and thai
they were not to worry, that the chile
was in a good place, where she would be
taken care Of He went on in his soft
Irish speech to comfort and soothe the
tired, crying mother, and when he left
'tSkimp'' had decided that he and his
gang would bother the kindly cop nc
longer.
'cut it out there were others who re-
fused. In a week there were two stores
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
How to Win a Prize

Samples Prizes Will Be
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

The Evening Star Base Ball Contest
ENTRY BLANK. COUNTS 500 VOTES.
Observation-Disclosures. 1913
the following your Base Ball Subscrp
ton Contest:
Name of captain
Address of team captain
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
C0NDOLES WITH HONDURAS.
President Sends Message on the
Death of Bonilla.

President Wilson has sent the following
telegram to the new President of Hon.
duras on the death Of President Bonilla
THE government and people of the
United States of America join me in Offer
ing heartfelt condolences in the great loss
which has been sustained by the republic
of Honduras In the lamented death OF
his excellency President Bonilla.''
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

All this happened some years ago.
"Skimp' is now known at Shadow
"Skimp'' is now known as Shadow
clothes man. Tim has given up his beat
and is desk man at the 35th street sta
ton.
For a long time Tim and "Skimp'
ruled on River street together, and old
timers recall that for years a man could
walk that thoroughfare at / o'clock in
the morning with diamond in his neck
little under the weather. and yet reach
his abode in richer sections of the city
without reporting anything missing the
next day.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

When Jim ORiley.. feared. loved ana
hated. no longer appeared on his old beat
through River street a close watch was
kept by the natives of that region upon
his successor.
He proved to be slow moving bus
husky looking chap by the name Of Tim
O.Hara. He had a sunny snile-almost
too sunny for a man on his job.
Among the first to try the mettle of
Tim was "Skimp Schmidt. leader OF the
north end River street gang" 'Skimp''
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
Resigns From Navy Department.

Emery Cox, son of MIR. and Mrs w. V.
Cox, has resigned from the bureau of
construction. Navy Department. to ac-
cept position with the Newport News
Shipbuilding and Dry Dock Company,
Newport News. Va Mr.. Cox was gradu-
ated a marine engineer in the class
of 1912, University of Michigan.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

was very sure that one of those singing
voices came right from that very spot.
He was SO surprised that he hopped to
his feet and excitedly beckoned to Jerry
Muskrat The instant he did that the
voices near him stopped singing and the
little spots on the water disappeared,
leaving just the tiniest Of little rings.
just such tiny little rings as drops of
rain falling on the Smiling Pool would
make. And as the very tiny spot near
est to him that looked like tiny nose
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23
Steamer Mcintosh Floated.

The revenue cutter Apache yesterday
fioated the steamer A. ]. Mcintosh, which
ran aground at Oxford, Md.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

broken into and robbed and Tim was
given notice that il it happened again
and he failed to land the culprits he
only would be given time to say good
bye to the force.
In old jim O'Riley's day there had been
mighty few attempts to clean up the
little stores along the front" Against
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-23

reached about Tins hip in height. bet
his courage was equal to many an emer-
gency. This time, from the shadow of a
big tenement ''SksJnp' stole out as the
policeman passed. and. posing himself,
threw a potato at the blue helmet.
With solid plunk the vegetable land
cd and the new helmet bounced and
bounded into the street. When Tim, red