Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-10-19
ODD CLIENTS
WHAT is the most peculiar case that ha


spective client?" was the question put not
long ago by. the writer to one of the best
known lawyers in New York.
The lawyer thought a moment. Three
weeks ago. he said, the negro who washes
windows in our office building came to me
and said, 'Mistah, All wish yo' would accept
me as client And what grievance have
YOU, Olin? asked. 1t amt me, the negro
REPLIED it's nah brother. He's been in
generated in the Newark jail. and All wish
yo' would help me to git him out | told
Olin to sit down. What was your brother
arrested for?' l asked him. He hesitated
and then stammered, Well, All don't just
exactly know; but All think-Ah think it
was TO fragrancy.
The LAWYER said that probably the oldest
client who had ever visited him was woman
about forty years old, who wanted to bring
suit against one of the Sunday newspapers
for not having printed an account of her
latest social function" on its society page,
as she had particularly requested over the
telephone.
AS the second oldest client, he cited the
case of another woman who had come to him
in tears and sought to enlist his legal aid in
making her husband stop flirting. The
woman assured me that she loved her hus-
band and that she knew her husband loved
her. but that he had habit of winking at
every good looking woman he saw, said the
LAWYER. When / told her there was no
legal redress for her-inasmuch as she said
| was a fool if l even thought she or her
husband wanted divorce-she exclaimed
that was the poorest lawyer she had ever
heard of, and stamped out of my office in
rage
THE same question was put to several
other divorce, patent, and customs law
yers, and an unbelievably peculiar assort-
ment of would be clients was revealed through
their answers.
One of the patent lawyers cited the case
of a man who asked him to represent him
for two months at the patent Office in Wash
ington Il want you to 60 there, stay there,
and represent me-" said the man.
But" interposed the attorney, what in
the world do you want ME to do while am
there?"
The man drew his chair close to the law
ver's and in low tones told the attorney that
he had invented an "aeroplane clock as
he called it, and that he wanted him to 60
to the patent Office and prevent any other
inventor from sneaking in a similar inven-
ton while the authorities are IN careless
mood"
The man seemed to be in his normal senses,
despite the fact that his highly priced in
yention was absolutely nothing more than a
small watch fastened in a leather case, the
sort that may be seen in stores anywhere.
When he had impaired this information
the lawyer pointed out that there was moth
ing patentable about his invention" any
way.
"There isn't, eh?" shouted the man. In
deed there isl Who has ever thought before
this of putting clock in an airship?"
The attorney sought to humor him and
said, Wouldn't watch in the aviator's
pocket do as well?"
The man jumped up. THAT'S just the
point" he cried. :" 1t would not do as well,
because it might fall out"
Against such logic the attorney said he
found himself helpless, and he told the man
he feared the case was too difficult for him
to handle.
A MOTHER strange client who visited a
\ patent lawyer wanted to secure a patent
on a flower clothespin." The latter was
an ordinary wooden clothespin with little
wire point on top. On the latter fresh flow
ers might be stuck; thereby, according to
the inventor, 'giving the clotheslines the
appearance of flower gardens" The inven-
tor saw fortune from the sale of his pins
in cities.
When the lawyer assured him that, be-