Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1913-08-07
QUITTING TOWNS
ION THE MAP
By F. j. wilstach.

Is there any sure way Of Putting Z
Town on the Map?"
There are hundreds of towns thai
have never been blazoned on the flags
Of fame. while the names Of others
for one cause or another.-are evel
aflutter on the public flagpole.
1t may be said that there Is no sure
way to make town famous. but the
things which may contribute to put
ting 1t on the map" are nevertheless
of decided interest.
A town. like an Individual. to be
known, must have done something:
must be something other than mere
conglomeration OF people.
When Sir Walter Raleigh was on
his way to Virginia, he CHANGED to
look at map OF the Magellan strait
Here he discovered a point of land la
belled: The Painters Wife's Island
Sir Walter expressed surprise that
heretofore he had not noticed such an
island. The captain told him there
was no such island. explaining that
one day when the painter Of the map
was at work, his wife requested him
to put in an island for her. This, the
painter did, calling 1t 1.-The Painters
Wife's Island"
A good many towns are like "The
Painters Wifes 1sland;" they repre-
sent nothing; they can be found on
the map. but that is about all.
There are several reasons which
and cause it to stay put" One OF
these is that it may gain renown
through the celebrity of one of its
citizens. There are a great number OF
towns the size of Concord, Mass, yet
Emerson put it, on the map" just
as Lincoln did Springfield, H.; JUS,
as Walt Whitman did Camden, N. j.;
To
THE Danbury News Man." did DAN
bury, Conn; just as William Shakes
peare did Stratford on Avon. Nobody
ever hears of these towns except In
association with these famous names
Even Elbert Hubbard put the roai
in East Aurora.
Then a town may be the seat OF
some art or manufactory,-such for
example, as Detroit. which is famous
for misunderstanding Creek for
breakfast foods, Grand Rapids for
furniture, South Bend for plows, Sey-
mour Conn. for Waterman pens.
Bridgeport for monographs, Glouster
for fish. Ansonia for clocks, Columbus
for buggies. and 1T was beer that
placed Milwaukee on the crest of the
foam Of fame.
A comic will serve the purpose.
sometimes, of placing even the most
outlandish burg. We all remember
Dan Daly's song of Far Cohoes;
Peter Days famous ditty of the
Hackensack:" and who can forget
Peoria after hearing of the show that
busted UP" In that classic city,
Other towns are remembered only
IN account of some thrilling battle, ex-
traordinary crime, or devasting ca
lamity. We all remember the North
ampton bank robbery. the Astabula
l,viH OF s,n hnr oP
burg and Of Waterloo, and the Johns
Town flood.
The onomatopeic names of some
lowns.-producing uproarious cachina
tions,-such as Kalamazoo. Podunk
and Oshkosh,-are ever visible on the
mental timetable. You simply can't
forget them.
Some towns. too. are long time
getting placed ION the map" Until
the occurrence Of some unexpected
event their traditions, their history
their very existence is confined to the
outskirts of their Immediate neighbor-
rood.
week ago. Where is Darien?" they
would, more than likely, have an
Jwered that ut is gulf in the Car
ribbean sea-" or, 1T Is In Georgia.
or 1T is in Missouri" or 1T is in
wisconsin," Or There is an Isthmus
Of Darien, near Panama." or have
quoted Keats: Looked at each othe,
with wild surprise. silent. upon a
peak In Darien."
NOW ask anyone, where is Darien o
and they are certain to have in mind
only the quaint old town Of that name
in Connecticut. 1t is the pageant te
be that has served this admirable pur-
pose, for 1t has blazoned forth the
towns amazing historic background
and tho fact that III has haan the home
of a surprisingly large number Of ex-
traordinary people.
The pageant has put Darien ION the
map."