Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1913-12-26
Seuen Keys to Baldpate
BY EARL DERR BIcCERS
Copyright by Bobbs- Merrill Coz

wife for five years. what would YOU
say when you drifted back?"
THAT would depend" replied Ma
gee, ION the amount of time she al
lowed me for my speech"
you've hit the nail on the head
replied Mr.. Peters admiringly. "She's
quick. She's like lightning. She
won't give me any time IL she car
help it. That's why I'd like to have
a wonderful speech all ready-some-
thing that would hold her spellbound
and tongue-tied until 1 finished. II
would take a literary classic to dc
that"
What you want" laughed Magee
sis a speech with the punch"
Exactly" agreed Mr.. Peters. II
guess won't go over to Brooklyn
the minute I hit New York I guess
I'll study the lights along the big
street, and brush elbows with the
world a bit, before l reveal myself
to her. Maybe If l took in few
shows-but don't think I won't go to
her. My mind is made up, and
guess she'll be glad to see me, too
In her way. l got to fix 1t with her
though, to come back to my post
card trade In the summers. won
der what she'll say to that. Maybe
she could stay at the inn under an
assumed name while I was herrniting
up at the shack"
He laughed softly.
It'd be funny, wouldn't It," he said
"Her sitting on the veranda watch
ing me sell postcards to the ladies
and listening to the various stories OF
how a lost love has blighted my life
and so forth. Yes, it'd be real funny
only Ellen never had much sense of
humor. That was always her great
trouble. If you ever marry. Mr.. Ma
gee, and l suppose you will. take my
advice. Marry a sense of humor first
and q woman incidental-like.
Mr.. Magee promised to bear this
counsel in mind, and went forward
into the smoking car. Long rows OF
red plush seats, unoccupied save for
the mayor and Max, greeted his eye
He strolled to where they sat, about
halfway down the car, and lighted an
after-breakfast cigar.
Max slouched in the unresponsive
company of a cigarette on one side
of the car; across the aisle the mayor
of Reuton leaned heavily above a
cardtable placed between two seats
He was playing solitaire. Mr.. Magee
wondered whether this was merely
a display of bravado against schem-
| ing reformers, or whether Mr.. Cargan
found In 1t real diversion. Curious,
he slid into the place across the table
from the mayor.
Napoleon" he remarked lightly
s.whiled away many a dull hour with
cards, i believe.v
Clumsily the mayor shuffied the
cards. He flung them down one by
one on the polished surface of the
table rudely, as though they were re-
form votes he was counting. His
thick lips were tightly closed, his bic
hands lowered with unaccustomeo
uncertainty over the pasteboards.
"Quit your kidding" he replied. y
don't believe cards were invented in
Maps day. Was they? It's shame
q fellow can't have a little admira-
ton for great leader like Nap with
out all you funny boys jollying him
about it. That boy sure knew how
to handle the voters. I've read a loi
about him, and / like his style"
"You let history alone" snarled Mr.
Max, across-t the aisle, ''or it'll repeat
itself and another guy l know'u &c
to the island"
''If you mean me- returned Car
gan, forget it. There amt no Hell
ena in my future" He winked al
Magee. Louis little peevish this
morning" he said. Had q bad
night"