Morris tribune., 1913-10-31
NOVEMBER


To make him boiler Wow
And we therefore are not certain
That we have it on him now.
We'll no doubt get Carnegie
He's easier than John:
He likes to show his money
While crowd is looking on:
But we'll never get anither
Library frae him moo;
: Hoot mon as Harry Lauder says,
>, And mind, I'm telling you.
The King is in his counting room
Working with a pick,
And the Queen is in her paFlOr
Digging through the brick;
; The cook is in the backyard
Burying her pay.
And if people are not juhilant,
j. They re busy. anyway.
November gets its name from the
, Latin novem (nine), it having been
the ninth month in the old Roman
calendar: This brought Thanksgiving
: an at time when there was nothing
but oysters. and Numa moved the
month alQrg where the Thanksgiving
dinner could include turkey and cram
berries. He was promptly impeached,
owing to the great strength of the
Oyster Tsust, and ran for seat in
| the Senate from one Of the bog dis
tricts on the cranberry issue. 1t was
| during this campaign. which was one
of the bitterest in Roman history,
that Numa, from whom we have
numismatics. invented money. The
opposition had'EnO money, whereas
Numa and his friends made all they
wanted, and spent it laVishly. He
was not only triumphantly elected,
but also paid his private debts and
swung some very fine deals in the
. Roman stock market He became
Speaker of the Senate. and was COM
. pIetely vindicated in the next general
election. when he was chosen Emper-
or of Rome,
The festive calf will sniff the breeze
And do the hesitation waltz,
And the hardy doodlebug will sneeze
And cIamor for the smelling salts.
J The 'dogwood tree will blush for
j shame
! Of soon becoming wholly nude,
: The Democrats will bust hame
~ To get the currency reviewed.
= The crimson maple leaf will fly
!: With light abandon ON the wind,
/ And the wild goose will go down
:: the sky
With winter biting him behind.
The kind faced COW viii gently moo
and don her heavy suit of plush. and
the. quarter, shouting to his
crew, will bite and kick the center
rush The .camphorated overcoat will
render odoEous the air, the women,
calmoring to vote. will shout for EN-
incline the fair, the cider press will
, lift its plant from many rusty wheels
and cogs. the farmer, in his red war
paint, will run amuck among his hogs.
the robin redbreats will disport mo-
ment in the autumn sky, and the pop
ulace will storm the fort three times
a day for pumkin pie.
The golden beauty of the morn
will dim the splerdor of the rose. anC
the rooter, falling on his horn. will
blow the buttons off his clothes. The
hired man will stay abed until the
farmer drags him out. the Argentine
will whoop for Ted and blithely fol
low him about, the drvs will grapplt
with the vets on many a fair anC
tickle field. the weather men will
place their bets on what the season
has revealed. the squirrel. in hi
winter stores. and the cold northwinC
will do it's best to catch a slit Skin
out of doors.
The gentle Establishments of Fal
will make the days divinely fair, ant
the young man running with the bal
will hide it in his long black hair
The smell Of chitlins will excite tn
crowd around the kitchen door, tn
pheasant, waking with the light. viii
fill the forest with his roar, the sorg
hum kettle will diffuse it's subtle toni
on the breeze. the fool duckshoote
will amuse himself contracting som
disease, the hosts of Winter will ad
vance, with Autumn we'll, upon tn
run, and the plumber, home fror
Paris. France, will cali assessmer
number one.
The turkey will begin to count.
The days between him and til
pan,
And the lustrous moon will aoftl
mount
The starry arch of heaven 8 spar
The rash deer hunter will espy