The Bamberg herald. [volume] (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, 1913-05-01
A TRUE NATURE FAKE.
How Roosevelt Received a Fund of
Information Regarding Ferrets.

The fact that a man of the name of
Johnson has been employed to rid
Harvard college of rats recalls story
concerning Theodore Roosevelt. The
magic words bringing up the memory
are, of course, johnson" (not Hi
ram) and rats" This is the story:
In the days of the first consecutive
cup of coffee-that is, about 1912
an Arizona newspaper man out of
Job turned up in Washington. A
local morning paper gave him tenta-
tive employment, and as his first as
lsignment sent him to interview the
official White House ratcatcher, di-
laidated man constantly equipped with
Iferrets, terriers and other vermin
destroyers, and ask him how he did it.
The ratcatcher was soon found and
with difficulty gave up his informa-
ton. 1t appeared that something was
lacking. After the Arizona newspaper
man had supplied that lack the mel
low ratcatcher invited him to dis
Iguise himself as his (the ratcatcher's
Iassistant) and come up to the execu-
tive mansion. This looked like a
better "story" than bare interview,
and the reporter embraced the cppor-
tunity.
The cellar of the White House is
wonderful place, and from this basis
the ratcatcher started his operations,
According to the story, the Roosevelt
children soon got wind ofthe fun and
descended to the depths to join in the
sport. Presently, and at moment
when the ratcatcher and the children
we're scampering down some ancient
alleyway to the assistant ratcatcher,
alias the Arizona newspaper man,
there descended the president him
|self. The man of the pencil nearly
fled, for he feared lest his false pre-
tense be discovered But Roosevelt
was too eager, having espied a fer
Iret in the pretender's hand.
Immediately the naturalist was up
permost and the executive was sub
merged. He wanted to know what
kind of an animal that was. GA ferret
sir" was the reply. Indeed, ferret
was a new beast in the Rooseveltian
catalogue. What might be its habits?
How was it bred? What could it be
taught? And so on. At first the news
paper man hesitated; he knew moth
ng of ferrets; had never seen one be-
fore. But again came the impetuous
questions. Either he must confess or
make good. Fearing confession, he
proceeded to make good.
The Arizona newspaper man there
upon described the natural history OF
the ferret. He went into the ances-
try of the ferret, tracing it from pro-
topasm to finished beast. He told OF
it's family traits, it's instincts, its char
acteristics, acquired and inherited.
He created for the ferret a career
which would have excited the envy OF
other animals in whose biographies
the literary imagination has not been
exercised. While Mr.. Roosevelt
drank in this brand-new information
the reporter dilated more and more,
and, going back to the days when it
had paid him good money to write
wild nature fakes under an Arizona
date line, he dilated some more still,
all the while keeping weather eye
out for the return to- that part of the
cellar of the real ratcatcher. Forum
ately the president had had enough be-
ore the proper owner of the ferrets
eturLAd; otherwise there might have
been one Arizona newspaper man less
WASHINGTON. At the conclusion of
the yarning Roosevelt stumped
thoughtfully back upstairs, no doubt
uminating a book on the ferret
which would put the encyclopedia to
blush.
There is no moral to this tale. 1t is
true, and a glance at the writings
of Mr.. Roosevelt under the head Fer
ret" might or might not be illuminat-
ng.-Boston Transcript.