The Washington herald., 1913-06-09
STATESMEN, REAL AND NEAR
BY FRED c. KELLY.

Senator Chiffon 10 a great friend Of the
page boys about the Senate chamber
Some time ago ne inquired or bright
| looking little chap how he put in his
spare time. The boy said he went TO his
room and utilized every possible moment
| in reading.
well, now, there's some sense to that"
commended Chiffon. "A boy who reads
SO much is certain TO get ahead in the
| world. That's splendid"
And he was about TO give the lad
scholarly talk about the value of good
| books when they were interrupted.
Every time he passed the boy after
that he asked him If he were still stick
ing to mis- programme and reading as
much as ever
Indeed. SIR" the boy always replied.
Il devote every spare moment 1 have to
reading
Chiffon told some of his colleagues
about this, and all agreed that the young
ster had a bright future before him.
And, by the way," Chiffon CHANGED to
| inquire one day what books do You
read Mostly"
"Oh. l don't read books at ALL" replied
the boy; Il never get time for that, sir.
You see. out where l board they take
three different Sunday papers, and 1t
through"
Eugene Wood, the writer. used TO work
on the Chicago News, years ago, when
Butch" White was the city editor.
White was wonderfully capable man.
but renowned for a predisposition toward
periodical grOuChes. When one OF these
spells was on him he was not a SYM
pathetic or jovial spirit.
Wood reported for duty one noon all
wreathed in smiles. and extending his
hand toward White, said:
We'll, congratulate me"
"On what" asked White, looking up
and glaring at him.
Il was married last night" announced
Wood, still beaming-
Congratulate you repeated White.
You're crazy. Congratulate a blamed
fool for getting married on your salary.
Congratulate you nothing. I'll fire you,
that's what I'll do. You're discharged"
And he was, too. Wood went home to
break the news to his bride
A. Mitchell Palmer. the Gibsonesque-
featured Pennsylvania member. who is
the leading matinee idol of the House,
and who is supposed to have declined a
place as Secretary of War in the Wilson
Cabinet, on the ground that he is a
Quaker and stands for peace.
Well, anyway. as we were about to-
say when he got short of breath. a.
Mitchell isn't so blamed peaceful at
that. II he had been peaceful and dis
posed to let traditions go their way I'M
molested. he would not now be on his
third term in Congress.
They had a funny system about Con-
gress out in the district that A. Mitchell
halls from. No one was supposed to-
have more than one term, and the party
leaders picked their Congressman years
in advance. 1t was a good deal like the
futurity stakes in which one bets on
race horses yet unborn.
The rotation system, they called it,
and as the tendency grew to pick the
order of Congressman ahead of time, no.
body, not even little children, felt safe.
If the thing went on, boy playing
marbles in side street could have no
assurance that the party leaders had
not tagged him to forsake home and
friends and go to Congress in 1876
Palmer was picked long before he
actually got the nomination, and by the
time he entered the House. the sched-
ule OF his successors was mapped out
clear up to the opening OF the Panama |
Canal or Whereabouts.
he got down here, the more it seemed |
to him that the rotation system might |
work hardship on those who had made |
otr' arrangements. Suppose, for ex-
ample, that young man had planned |
to devote his life to being high grade
shoe salesman, and the party leaders, not |
knowing this. picked him out to run for |
Congress. The man would have to give |
p his career just to satisfy a silly
precedent. What the district needed, as il |
seemed to Palmer, was a man with patri-
otic impulses willing to forsake private
ambitions and stay in Congress indefi-
nitely. He racked his brain for the
name of some good man to take the per-
manent job of Representative. Who
should it be! All of sudden a name
flashed in his mind. A. Mitchell Palmer,
The very man. 1t was funny he hadn't
thought of him before.
So A. Mitchell went and told the lead
ers just to cancel the other names for
the next few terms and to get their
sleep nights instead of sitting up fret
ting over the rotation problem.
: And, would you believe 1t. they told A.
Mitchell they wouldn't think of letting
him do more than his share of going to
Congressional 1t would simply maksa