The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1913-07-30
MARRIED LIFE THE FIRST YEAR
THE BABY
BY MABEL HERBERT uRNER.
IL of motherhood

BY MABEL HERBERT URNER.
The thrill of motherhood,
Helen tried hard to feel that when
the baby was laid in her arms. But
somehow she couldn't Her strongest
feeling was one of uneasiness, of
nervous fear of hurting it. She couldn't
find no way of holding it comfort
ably.
| However she placed it, it would
manage to riggle into some other po-
sition. She was afraid 20 sleep when
it was beside her for fear she would
turn over on it. She had horrible vi
, sions Of waking up and finding it
tsmothered to death. 1t was so little,
there seemed no way to keep it COW
cred, and yet keep it's head out so it
could breathe.
She was glad the room was kept
dim. She didn't want to see it again
now. She had looked at it
once, and it had been so
red and wrinkled that her
feelings had been almost one of re-
pulsion. She told herself that it was
a most unnatural and unmotherly feel
ing, but that had not changed it.
Dreams and Reality.
Her dream pictures had been of a
golden-haired, blue-eyed baby-the
kind one sees on calendars and infant
food advertisements, but this was very
different. There wasn't any hair at
all, and it's eyes were so squinted
that their colcr couldn't be told.
After the first look, she turned her
face to the wall with faint request to
the nurse to take it away The nurse
had tried to assure her that all very
new babies looked that way, that it
took several weeks before they were
very pretty.
And then Helen asked if Warren
had seen it. And when she was told
he hadn't, she asked them to keep it
from him until it looked little diff
ferent"
4, For some reason she felt it was her
fault, that its unattractiveness was a
personal reflection on her. She won
dered if she could ever grow to love
tiff it would always be ugly. The
possibility of having a homely child
had never occurred to her, so certain
had she been that her baby would be
beautiful.
Mother Thoughts.
Probably after while it wouldn't
be SO red and SO wrinkled, but it's
mouth had seemed so large. Could
time change those things? From that
one glimpse, deep in her heart, she
could not believe that time would
make it beautiful child.
II it had been a boy, it's look would
not have mattered so much, just so it
was big and strong. But an ugly lit
tie girl! The thoughts made her sick
q heart.
And then she thought of all the
dainty little clothes she had made
lace gowns with blue ribbons. Blue
ribbons on that crimson baby!
Nurse, don't use any of those little
dresses that have blue ribbons. l
don't think blue very becoming to it
now!
The nurse promised, depressing a
smile.
"An Ugly Little Girl"
And then again she turned her face
to the wall and began miserably to
plan how she would dress it if it
were always the ugly little girl! At
least she would have the Judgment to
dress it plainly, to make it as incon-
spicuous as possible. She had always
thought it ridiculous to see ugly little
children dressed up in all sorts of
frills and furbelows.
And then she thought of the fam
fly reunions and dinners at Warren's
fathers, when Carrie (Warren's sis
teri would bring her three beautiful
children! And she had looked for
ward SO proudly to taking her own
beautiful baby; and now-and now
she would have to take an ugly little
girl!
Why should Carrie have lovely chill
dren If she could not? Carries hus.
band was not nearly as good looking