New-York tribune., 1913-07-20
AS | WAS SAYING

Now II Is Mr. Julian street who has oeen ana
Gone and done H. Listen while read aloud
"Of her picturesoueness, Shelley Wicket became
strongly aware when he first met her. Being
New Yorker. he first noticed her gown II was
fashioned from that fabric most admired by men
black velvet"
Whoa Julian, After this there will not he
square inch Of black velvet left at large anywhere
ON the eartb's surface. You have annihated an
entire industry. and YOU kno" ho" vindlcuFe theSe
great corporations are when hit where they I'VE
oh. YES we have heard the romantic whopper
about vomcn's dressing to please men. Do 90
they? Then why those hooks? Surely you must
have seen that equestrian bronze general over yon
der i'm Boston, and the inscription on the pedestal
Hooker" Rarely has so much agonzed humllIa-
tion been compressed into one word
And lust risk glance at the current MODES. are
they designed to please men? Quite the contrary
We are half dead with wrath and fright a"o' -
George It is no accident. either
So Won see It looks dark indeed for tho Black
Velvet Trust and consequently for the rash anthor
who has sealed the doom Of black velvet by calling
E, "the fabric most admired by men Fly JuHah.
scoot. cut FOR the tall timber while It is yet DAY
our entire spiritual nature rises UP ~ aPP'a"u
the General Fire Extingushcr Companys oe'lSlon
=, remove from Proyidencc. Amen! It amounts
almost to a confession Of faih.
I, 10 awful about Mexico There sits President
wilson q student n government all his days YET
cannot recognize this elaring instance NeeaS spec
,,rles we infer so hasten to recommend that uusS
pair. sehors Huerta and carranla.
The las, yestires Of our confidence IN DR.. Fried
nam, vanished when his recipe came out. Microbes
,,eu and good. but think OF German introducing
,,oter into the human system
Meanwhile however We have come more ana
more to trust the As I Was Saving cure behoI'
our discharged patient Mr.. MelIen Before AK'ns'
confirmed railway president Aii'r laA'"s' "''
marvellous, Able TO bc about the streets even J"
broad daylight And only how tn" young Iady
49,, ,, ,,,r NJ ..NcCIure's" has freshened up quite
bopncer this time though must admit that we
have moi wholly succeeded in quelling her meh'al
svmptoms stubborn case. this Give US another
month and we shall hope to complete the cure
Fierce and hot RACES the Wild fiction contest at
"Colller's" and there is joyous activity among 'he
mterate Manuscripts pour. in from persons VINO
..,etr,,. rrfarniliarity with the pen means OF
arv tind Of communication" Indeed. 1t appears
that the vision Of sudden wealth has inspired 'he
tyne 81 bromide who remarks "ondescehdlhsH' -
too would write II my time were not so Naiuap''
yo,, SEQ what ails our mute. inglorious Millions
They resemble the pugilists. II taxes Il Simply re-
voting sum Of money 10 get them started TOT YOU
must not think of pugilist a restless turbulent
bellicose spirit ever crying. 49, -- "
-M Leave me at him'!"' No. beloved ne Is
tho original and on the whole the most trustworthy
Dove Of Peace.
with merry honk, honk they are off-for day
Of it, they say. You wonder. though Adleus on ue
dock are nothing to this. as liners go prepared 10
II &c q luxury 10 report the wise measures taken by
..,,Lg al hH
ing car TO the shpyard for thorough overhaulins.
what with wireless and with emergency motor
cycles hanging from davts at either side OF the car
he hopes To- feel as secure if sailing by the Neu-
rotic.
Tut. tut. f. r. A. 1t is true that Punch prints
this mirthful treasure:
Excited old Lady Gas express thunders through
station: "Oh porter! Doesn't that train stop here?
Patient Porter: mo. lidy. it don't even hesitate.
And if is doubtless true that the mirthful treasure
dates from several centuries before the year Good
ness Knows When. But jumping on 'Punch Is
dangerous Next you know. you will frighten Tit
Bits" which consists solely Of American chestnuts
and is therefore worth months board every year
to our native humoriss.
The young idea is great history in Brockton.
where THE Daily Enterprise" has been collecting
schoolboys' answers to the question What Is your
favorte character in American history, and why?'
4 sample:
THE redoubtful John Paul Jones. who said, Wen
lick the British bust and then went and did it,
We like 'redoubtful" We thought IL just the word
when they dug up John Paul and fetched him over.
And burrowng into our heart. we discover that We
still do! X. L. H.
EVEN MORTIFIED.
From The Philadelphia North American.
Chnese laarn OF lesson this morn