davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
Fox Made the Cat Dizzy.

Augustus Johnson. machinist en-
ployed by the Seth Thomas Clock COM
pany in Thomson. tells this story:
II went fox-hunting by moonlight.
Near Henry Pickett's house q large
cat came along pursued by fox. The
feline climbed q tree whereupon the
fox began to circle about the trunk.
The cat watched the fox until It be-
came dizzy and fell to the ground.
As the fox started away with the cat
l shot and got both fox and cat"-
Winsted (Conn-) Dispatch to New
York American.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
And who may you be?"

And who may you BET" cried the
other. with furious oath.
my name Is Arlington Peace OF the
criminal investigation department OF
Scotland Yard, and I arrest you both
for being concerned in the robbery OF
a valuable diamond. the property Of
Mr.. Julius Taubery."
Stolen a diamond" he beloved.
do you call that diamond?
He flung down stone that sparkled
in the lights behind him, and stamped
1t into the gravel with his heel.
II am aware that 1t Is the imita-
tion." said the inspector. But 1t was
not your fault that you missed the
real thing. have cab waiting. You
had better come with me quietly. And
I warn you. Steadman. that anything
you say VIII be used In evidence
against you"
It was after two In the morning be-
fore the inspector tapped at the door
OF my rooms. I had made the fourth
of that odd cab load to the nearest
police station: for. though Mr.. Jack
Steadman had clustered. and the Hon.
George Carstairs had groveled and
whined thither. they had consented to
go at last. And there I had left the
detective and his prisoners. driving to
my rooms to await his return.
The case was 1ot quite SO dif1cuIt
q you suppose. Mr.. Phillips" he
said. In answer to my question. lyon
remember that believed the diamond
to be still In the house?"
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11

Certainly.
TT would be hard to imagine . mort
useful bait. It was certain that thu
thieves would have another bite 81
It: It was also certain that ought tt
be able to hook them when they did
Yet 1 very nearly lost the diamond
after all. Taubery. Gunton and thu
servants had all declared that, since
the robbery. nothing had been moved
from the dining room. passage or II
brary. There they made q mistake.
"Taubery's little grandson, George
happened to leave his toy horse in the
passage from the dining room, and
into the hole made for the pomme
that poor creature. Carstairs, had
dropped the diamond with a last de
spairing effort to get rid OF 1t before
Colonel Gunton searched him. Ter
minutes afterwards the little boy
went out for walk with his nurse
taking the horse with him. When hi
returned 1t was left, as usual, in the
servants quarters at the back ]
never set eyes on 1t until day later
Even then I should not have suspect
ed what 1t contained had not the
nurse complained to me OF man who
followed her when she took George
for his daily airing In the park. That
was the sign for which I had been
looking. accompanied the pair on
the following morning. / saw the
man, but did not recognize him.
Neither the nurse nor the boy
could well be carrying the diamond
about with them. There remained the
horse. That night extracted the real
diamond, and not wishing to spoil my
bait for the shy fish. dropped the i'm,
itation stone into its place.
THE toy was watched by night and
day. It was through a hint from me
that 1t was included in the sale. Poor
Colonel Gunton! admit that his co
centric bidding startled me for q mo
ment.
You can understand Steadman'a
fury when, after all his plots and risks
and expenditure, his silly dupe brought
him back the Identical imitation stone
that had been made to deceive old
Taubery. l don't believe that the Tro
jams could have been more astonished
when the Greeks emerged from the
wooden horse than was Steadman
when he took out the diamond from
the toy and found it to be the imita,
toni"
And who was Steadman?"
"A very dangerous fellow. Mr.. Phil
lips. I recognized him the moment be
appeared at the door. For years he
was a bookmaker In Paris. but left
when the place got too hot for him.
AS card player he Is well known and
avoided. He has been in low water
lately. So has his dupe, Carstairs, as
l now discover. Lord Wintone, the
young mans brother, set him up as
coffee planter in Ceylon, but he spent
all the money given him and re-
turned six months ago. Carstairs was
a distant connection of Mrs. Taubery's
and both she and her husband had
been very kind to him. He was al
ways loafing about the house. getting
free meals and now and then borrow.
ing a flyer. He must have heard OF
the new diamond and mentioned 1t to
Steadman; for Steadman Matched the
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
Good Model.


He was somewhat eaten nm With n
mistaken consciousness Of his own
Importance. and when he was making
his great speech In the Muddlecombe
mock parliament, he noted that one
OF the local pressmen appeared to
be sketching him. When the 'shouse"
adjourned he buttonholed the artist
believe-aw-you were-aw-
sketching me; isn't that so-ewfs he
inquired.
That Is So" replied the artist
Weii-aw-would you-aw-tell
me what noospaper you-aw-repre-
sent-aw?"
I don't represent any newspaper. y
answered the artist. Il design comic
postcards. "-Tidbits.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11

corrects constipation. Munyon's Paw-Pa.
Pills are tonic to the stomach. liver and
nerves. They invigorate instead OF weak's
they enrich the blood instead Of impove.
ishing it: they enable the stomach to get
the nourishment from food that is put ia6|
t. Price IS cents. All Druggists.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
Optimistic.

We'll, BILL" said the temporarily re-
tired burglar to his pal. there's one
thing we oughter be thankful for here
In the pen"
"Wot's that?" said Bill.
I'VE amt bothered much dods,n.
orterfnobiles, or worryin' over TIA
high cost q livin'." said the T. 4. b.
Harper's Weekly.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
just 4 Hint.

Some morning just make believe
you are company In your own home:
your family Will not be more astonish.
cd at your conduct than you are your.
self.-The Universalist Leader.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
NOV. JACK STEADltAN, THAT Is
QUITE ENOUGH

plot-there Is no doubt about that.
Carstairs was merely dupe and q
foolish. vicious dupe at that-he never
had the ability to rise higher In crime.
How the two became acquainted / do
not know; but they have been seen
together several times lately. You
may take my word for it, that the
public will be we'll rid OF them for a
year or two"
CHRONICLES TO BE CoNrINUED.)
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
Brotheriy Love.

ALL" said conceited young per-
son, II have this afternoon hean
preaching to . congregation Of asses, !.
Then that was the reason why YOU
always called them beloved brethren.
Replied strong-minded LADY TIE
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11

Munyon's Paw'Pss|
Pillsare unlikealloh|
er laxatives or cathztI
tics. They coax b..
liver into activiHhI
gentle methods, hq|
do not scour; they b
not grippe: they do d
weaken: but they D.
start all the secretion
of the liver and sturt
ach in a way that SON
puts these organs M
healthy condition and
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
Why He was Glad.

The man with the long beard o.,
pensively at the curbing gazins \
the passing traffic in the street n \
hail with delight the advent NJ .,
automobile, he muttered aloud ~
no longer need fear CROSSING ~
street lest some hungry horse mist,s
me for walking bale of hay"
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11
The Miser.

The Miser.
Here" said Teddy's papa, Showing
the little boy a coin, lis penny 3N|
years old. It was given to me when
was a little boy" Gee whiz!" ejaN|
lated Teddy, "just think of anybodI
being able to keep a penny as long al
that without spending it."
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11


Erect.
bys I
|lsO a
| Owe
|ccess
Ind II
|fficia
Hermit
I
vitho1
p,
hess
w "
IT He
Watch
| By
be il
with /
The ?
has !
Castle
Btorie
| ''Po
mean
Phow,
Zoe F
Ppeab
other
oor
pur ]
three
Dne q
,
Rin't
'nly
| H,
| w
,
Say,
| To
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11

~ HE Navajo Indian reservation.
lying partly in New Mexico
and partly in Arizona, over
laps the Continental divide
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1913-04-11

The
5siitid|
| ~oriil
bill pa
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
For Abandoned Children.

Hungary maintains IL institutions
Of INDECENT, abandoned, delinquent and
abused children. It is the custom to
receive every child applicant, to give
him bath and clean clothes and then
to investigate his condition. If the
investigation warrants the states in
reference the child is admitted. Sew
enteen thousand children were thus
received in 1908. Most of these are
placed out in the country or smaller
cities with farmers or artisans of
good character and in moderate cir
cumstances. Five reformatories have
been established for delinquent or
absolutely unruly children. They
have room for thousand inmates,
who live together in family groups Of
%, learning a trade under the super
vision Of the head of the household.
Corporal punishment is still admins
tered. Up to 1908 1881 inmates had
been released on parole, 86.6 per
cent. had worked steadily and had
kept straight, 5.4 per cent. had COM
mitted crimes, and per cent. had dis.
Survey.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
ALL LOOK FOR GRATITUDE
Nothing That Can Be Bestowed Is
Able to Take It's Place in the
Human Heart.

Gratitude given or received is one
of the best things in the world. We
need far more of it and far better quail
ity. Yet / have never read any salts
factory account of what it so glorious
ly means. It's value begins just where
the value of pay ends. Thanks are
personal, and attempt to fit an ade-
quate response to the particular serv-
ice performed. Pay is an impersonal
coin which has been handed out to
many before it reaches you, and will
go to many others when it leaves you.
1t is your right and you are not CRATE
full for it. But thanks are a free gift
and enrich the giver. There is no
nobler art than the art of expressing
ones gratitude in fresh, unhackneyed,
une1aggerated terms which answer
devotion with fresh devotion, fancy
with new fancy, charity with SINGER
ity. Artists who get their reward
only in money and in the stale plaud-
it's of clapping hands are restless for
something more individual. They
want to be intimately understood and
beautifully answered. For such graft
tude they look to brother artists, to
the few who really understand There
they find their best reward-but even
this leaves something wanting The
Atlantic.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
The Basement. :.
Philosopher
BY KENNETH HARRIS
lcopyrigh. l9l.. BY W. c. chapnlanl

1 q
NO. Nels. my friend" said the JAM
Tor TO his sorrowful Scandinavian as
sistant mo, Nels, / would not make
complaint to the police He shook
his head slowly and solemnly. "No. I
would not" he repeated. mot that /
grudge the police any harmless
amusement; they've a hard life of it,
them boys, what with investigating
committees, grand juries and the like.
There amt none too many rays Of
sunshine on their paths. But I'm con-
sidering it from your standpoint and
rs matter of principle. First of all,
what good is it agoing to do you?
Nov. as understand it, the guy
that sold you the ring was medium
sized guy with sandy mustache. If
you look close and careful at me,
you'll see that I'm medium sized and
while / wouldn't want no one to call
my mustache sandy to my face, I
amt got no doubt but what sandy is
the word stranger would use de-
scribing of it. And I amt the only
one. There's medium sized. sandy
mustached guys on the police force,
even. # they was to throw out the
drag and bring in all the sandy runts
in Chicago, business would be at a
standsSll and the cars would stop
running. You wouldn't want that,
would you? Sure you wouldn't.
I'm The next place, Nels," continued
the Jssnitor, this here guy didn't give
you no written guarantee that it was
genuine six-carat diamond that he
sold you for twc-seventy-five. He may
have give you the impression that it
was, when he picked it up off the
sidewalk, but impressions don't cut no
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

ally if a fellows got something good
to sell he wants somewhere near
what it's worth. If l found six
carat diamond ring / wouldn't sell it
to no sQuarehead for two-seventy-fiv
when I could hook it most anywhere
for ten dollars Same way if / owned
a gold mine that the finest experts
claimed would produce million a
day wouldn't peddle the stock at
i've cents a share to get money to de-
velop it and keep it out of the hands
Of the combine. I'd develop it with
my f1nger-nails first don't want my
bargains too big. I'm leary of 'em
when they get over a certain size.
may lose money that way, but I'll bet
I've saved lots Of it too. Still, If did
happen to buy a gold brick that some
sandy mustached guy had swipsd
from the sub-treasury, and found out
afterwards that it wasn't what it had
been cracked up to be, wouldn't
make no complaint to the government.
mo, don't you never holler Some
of these days you may buy an orange
grove in Florida and be sort Of dis
appointed with it, but you'll stand a
better chance of trading it off for
west side unimproved if you haven't
been too noisy about it to your circle
of acquaintance. Ever know a sue
cessful politician to squeal when he
was thrown down? Not on your life.
He let's bygones be bygones and keeps
his little snickersnee sharped up for
future use. You may not go into poll
tics, but it's cinch you'll get mar
ried, and there's another game where
you're liable to get the worst Of it. /
guess most every married man thinks
he has at times, and the women are
dead sure Of it. But why bellyache?
Here I've been married now close on
to twenty years and
s'No, Nels. my friend, it doesn't do
no good to boiler. Every boiler is a
knock and it isn't the other fellow
you're knocking, though you may
think it is.
"And if you'd had a five dollar bill
in your kick instead of the small
change you'd have been two and a
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
POETS Llcense.

Robert W. Chambers, the popular
novelist, was talking about a New
York poet.
"His poetry is always awkward Mr..
Chambers said. "He drags in words
that you can see are there solely for
the sake of rhyme. In fact, he reminds
me of Lake Sunapee epitaph.
TN a little churchyard overlooking
Lake Sunapee a gray, messy stone
bears this inscription:
AS sinks the sun with heightened
shadows,
So sank and died the good George
Meadows.
ON. B.-Deceased's name was
Fields, but Meadows is substituted for
the sake of the rhyme"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
Free Drinks for italian Lawmakers.

Free Drinks for italian Lawmakers.
Stormy sittings of the Italian cham
Der of deputies have led to increased
consumption of liquids, and some
economists are endeavoring to abolish
free drinks When deputy rises to
deliver a set Grafton, coffee and iced
water are brought him by a messen-
ger. One of the speakers neighbors
pours him out cup, and keeps it re-
plenished. There is a buffet in the
outer lobby where deputies are sup
Piled gratuitously with beer, wine
spirits, coffee, ices and mineral wa
tiers, and in hot weather this is well
patronized.
AS. however, the value Of the
drinks consumed last year by the
sos deputies was barely $4,000 (of
which $4,000 went for mineral waters)
they cannot be accused of excessive
thirst.
Parliamentary representative in
Italy receive lao pay. Free drinks and
free railway travel are the only priv
ileges they enjoy.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

Kidney Pills the swelling disappear
ed and he felt himself again. He says
he has been benefited and blessed by
the use of Dodds Kidney Pills. Sew
eral months later he wrote: / have
not changed my faith in your remedy
since the above statement was author
lied. Correspond with Rev. E. Hes.
lop about this wonderful remedy.
Dodds Kidney pills, SOC. per box at
your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co.,
Buffalo, N. Y. Write for Household
Hints, also music of National Anthem
English and German words) and re-
cipes for dainty dishes. All 3 sent free.
Adv.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

Ice. He might have thought it was
the same as you was. Anybody's LA
Bile to make mistake. What you
ought to have done was to have took
it to a good jeweler and had it certi-
fed before you paid out any money
on it. You was careless, that's all
there is about it.
"The other reason why I wouldn't
advise you to set the machinery of
the law in motion about this here
business, is the principle I was tell
ing you about You take this for your
motto: Never make holler'-not I'M
der no circumstances. If you get
stung, hide the swelling the best you
can and keep your mouth shut until
you get off some place by yourself
where nobody amt agoing to hear
you. Then if you want to relieve your
self by few remarks, go ahead and
make 'em and get it off your chest.
Anybody's liable to be sucker some
time; nobody can't be wise to all the
plants there is; but, believe me, the
biggest boob in the bunch is the va
hoo with the yawp, who wants every
body to know how shameful he's been
imposed on.
"You take it from me, Nels, my
friend: the fellow that's looking for
sympathy all the time never gets 1t.
What he gets is the f1shy eye or the
merry ha-ha, but sympathy-nix. Not
If he puts up boiler. If any son-of-
a-gun gets the best of me in deal,
l make up my mind I'm just as much
to blame for it as he is. All I've got
is what's acoming to me. II | can
throw rope on his goat any time
without advertising myself as an easy
mark, I'll do it; If can't. I'll charge
it up to experience.
"You see. I'm a man that likes TO
have the good opinion of my friends
declared the Janitor. I've got the
reputation of being a pretty f1ossy
proposition, at least that's what my
friends tell me, and Ill stand Tor g
pretty hard poke of the gait before III
contradict 'em. If there's any rumors
to the contrary floating around, they
don't come from me. II ! pick a WIN
ner any time, amt going to make no
dark secret Of it, but If drop
weeks wages on a bum tip, wouidn.
even tell my wife. This here worio
Is full Of brace games, Nels, my
friend; and we all go against EN-
more or less, the wise boys and the
sap-heads both; but there amt no evl-
dence against the wise ones. Iney
don't write no indignant letters TO
the papers. You'll see 'em come OUT
Of the side show with happy, satis,
fied smile on their faces, and tney
don't 20 back to tell the ticket seiiel
that he's short-changed EN-
"Most of the trouble we have IN the
way of getting skinned IS Wnen we sIy
to get something for nothing without
understanding the game. I've watched
things pretty close for man enae
got his work to lcok after, but never
seen a guy make his living by GYMS
away valuable property. Most sehet-
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
Increase Of Lunacy.

A famous British physician, DR.
Forbes Winslow, collected figures that
in all civilized countries .luDacy was
largely on the increase.
In 1853 there was one Iunatic in
every 536 of the population. Today
there is one in every 275. In France
60 years ago there was one insane per
son in every $50 of the population
Today there is one in every $780,"
This increase he attributed to al
cohol. social competition and strain,
heredity. and injudicious marriages
adding that if the present rate Of the
growth of lunacy continued we should
have more insane than sane in tu7
world 800 years hence.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
WHAT AND HOW TO BUY

Apurchasing agency for farmers and others not
in cities has been established in Milwaukee and
is called the Consumers Cooperative Co. The
manager, F. I. Terry, has been in active business
there for 30 years. They are sending their illus
trated cetalog free to all who ask and it is well
worth asking for as itquotes some low prices on
goods and offers new and interesting inventions
for comfort and the saving of labor. ADV.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
Their Oddly.

There is one odd thing about men
of IRON
What is that?"
$50 few of them appear to be well
tempered"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

ing, was dizzy
and exhausted at
the least exer-
ton. Hands and
feet were cold
and he had such
a dragging sensa-
ton across the
loins that it was
difficult to move.
After using 5
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
An lnsniratinn

Good gracious, Bill; why did you
start those girls going? Now they're
all excited and all talking at once"
That's what I did it for. I've got
to invent a new class yell.''
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
impossible.

Silence is gold. isn't it?"
"Of course"
"Then / wish they would invent
some new kind of dentistry that could
fill a woman's mouth with it.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
Easily Seen.

Your minister Is a good man, but
he'll never make great preacher"
why not?"
Because anybody can understand
everything he says"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
L Wonder,

Won ever noticed one odd
n' n.s sso9 t. blunt blunt. people"
VIVA " are the ones who generally
lD to the point" a.ss
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
AM TriaIs.

He-What do you think of all this
talk about trial marriages?
She-Why, is there any other kind ?
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
A cLEReYh;4N's TESTIMONY.

The Rev. Edmund Heslop of Wig.
ton, Pa, suffered from Dropsy for q
year. His limbs and feet were swol-
len and puffed He had heart futter-
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
The Archery Effect.

Belle feel a culver whenever
look at that handsome young man.
Nell-That's because he is beau.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

Coughs come from infamed Bronchial
Tubes. Deans Mentholated Cough Drops
heal the irritation-5c at all Drug Stores.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

,nrigbt pianos should be SO placed
ur ooms as to avoid dampness and
drafts.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

-,,orv,s Soothing Syrup for Children
Hrs,"lHSl ions the gums, reduces infiamma-
getting cures wind collie ,25c bottle.Ads
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
The Weapon.

-rould like to shoot all gossip
srs ,r,on 2 proper weapon would be a
-sDeating rife .
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

High frequency electric apparatus
has been invented for the use of bar
bers in massaging and shampooing.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
ASK FOR ALLEN,s FOOT-EAsE.

the Antseptic powder to shake into your shoes Re-
lieves Corns, Bunons, lngrowing Nails, Swollen and
where, &c. Don't accept any substitute. Sample
FREE Address, A. s. OlmSted, Le Roy, N. Y Adv.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

Occasionally we meet people who
are almost as smart as we are.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21
Just So.

II think well of good loser" "
I'VE I'VE. o." particularly if we get some
yes, ,onpv Boston Evening Tran
arint
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1913-11-21

quarter worse off than what you are
Think of that and be happy"