The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1913-01-11

upon. or emanatin' from the J-UpAnd-
Down ranch from that time. fr .
spell. stands IN a class by itself IN
cow country ANNALS. II begins with
q sort O. quarterly conference OF the
punchers. l gives 'em q sermon some
times as follers:
"Fellers," says I. its ben borne in
upon me that these dogies need drivin'
where they's fewere cows to the cubic
inch O water. Moreover. they're in
too much OF a huddle. Here's the hull
ten thousand eooped up within twen-
I yto thirty mile OF the spot whe-eon
We stand. You CANT swing a bob-cat
fby the tall" says l. without scratch
In their eyes out. II vilates the
crodwed tenement laws. II corrupts
the poor little inherent calves. It's
a Mulberry street shame. You are.
therefore, ordered an directed to dis
seminate these beeves oSe- a wider
expanse OF the moral heritage. You.
Doc. take ole and the Greaser. an
goin south an west with as many as
you can round up. drop OF a carload
r so at every watering place an sum-
mer resort up the Belle Fourche an
the North Fork ove onto the Powde-,
an as far as Sheridan. When yeh
git short OF cows. come back fr more.
There amt no real limits TO yer eff
forts short o. the Yellowstone. We
. must obey Mr.. Jackleg's orders about
huddlin.' I'll give Absalom an Pike
the Little Missouri. the Cannon Ball
and the Grand valleys. Git what help
YOU need; | grant power TO each OF
yeh 10 send fr persons an papers an
administer oaths. II necessary. I'll
take my. crew an try to gladden. the
waste places along the Moreau an
Cheyenne an White Rivers with
dogies. Get your gangs an scatter
seeds o. Kindness an long four.year.
Odds from hell to breakfast. Fo. as
yeh sow even shall yeh reap. II a
critter smothers from crowdin' ev'ral
TO a township these hot nights. some
body's goin' to be held personally re-
sponsible to me. You hear, / s'pose?'
is THIS straight goods. Aconite?"
says Doc.
Am a Professional humorist."
says ]. or am | the combined Fresh
Air Fund. s. p. C. A., and Jacob A.
ZIG naoshrnoshr noishrdanoshh
Rlis Of these yere hills? Am | the
main squeeze Of this outfit. an the
head of a responsible government. or
am ! not? HIT the grit says /. AN
began irradiatin' steers"
Obedience is a lovely thing. fellers.
an a man poised in an air ship a few
thousan' feet above a given pint
som'eres In the neighborhood o. the
Hay Stack Buttes. armed with a good
long range peekerfscope. might have
observed a beautiful outlust Of IL, all
that golding autumn. on the part OF
a class OF men presumably o%nsubordi-
nate-the ungrammaiical but warm.
hearted cowboys. They preached a
mixed assortment o. fairto-middlin'
steers unto all men. The Ten Thou
sand was absorbed into the landscape
of four great states. like a ship-Ioad
o Swedes into the Republican party.
The brethren OF the ranches heared
guadly the gospel of obeyin' orders
an werever "A Wisp OF cows amountin'
10 more than "A double handful con
gregated together in n place, there
was some obejient son of a gun in IN
midst OF EN-. movin' EN- along to.
wards the bubblin' springs. green
fields an pastors new OF Mr.. Jack.
legs orders. II was touchin'. never
felt so good. so sort o. glory-helleIu.
jahish I'm my life. as ! did aridin' back
to Wolf Nose Crick in the brown DC
tober weather. with h dogies m my
mind an the map. thinkin' OF how
Mrs. +. had squoze my hand. sort o.
weepful on moonlight nights. hut
sirongcr'n onions in a sense o. juty
we'll performed.
You can sort O. diuly ketch onto Tho
shock IL was to me. a-drillin' into
camp at Wolf Nose Crick in this yere
: peaceful frame OF mind. to find Mr.
JackleS there. madder'n a massas
sauga. an perfectly shameful in his
f%eelin's towards me
Where's these ten thousand head
q cattle. DriscOll?" he hollers on see
in me Here's your receipt for EN-
where's the stock"
Calm yourself" says /. droppin
my hand 10 my gun. the dOgies ID
all right. The dogies IS out yon in the
most unhuddled state Of any outfit on
the ange. fur from the slums Of Vol
Nose frick an their %corsuptin' inhu
euces. drinkin' all tho pure springs o
TOUR great American ealths
D laYtn' on FAT like aldermen. an IN ar
advanced stage Of segregation. Your
orders. say J. tickiod 10 think how
I'd remembered laugwidge 80 fur
above my station in life. your orders
vas 10 put I'M next 20 the damn
spots. an Keep EN- FUR apart. an has
been Oheycd regardless
Up fo that time had looked upor
him with contempt. but the way no
turned in an damned me showed how
sorcly I'd misiudEed him. As my 70
spcct TO- him riz. u grew important
not 10 lot BIN 90 on so. r. I cOuldn
let any reel man talk 10 me thata-way