The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
'0WHAT FUNNY THINGS YOU SEE
WHEN YOU HAVEN'T ANY GUN"
BY PIC K SMITH.

! We went on talking and soon became
| good friends. After he had quizzed me
while, l quiZzed him. and learned
that he was in no business at present
just been seeing the world for sew
| eraI years-was a retired brewer. His
room mate happened to be a saloon
keeper from Butte, Montana; mine
/ happened to be an Episcopal clergyman
from Nashville, Tennessee. We were
/ on that steamer three Sundays, and on
| the afternoon of each my clergy
man friend held services in the
main cabin, at each of which serv-
| ices on chairs in the next-to-the-front
row, sat, Gospel Hymns in each ones
hand, the saloon keeper, the ex-brewer
and yours truly. aiding materially in
the congregational singing 1t was the
only Episcopal service that / ever took
in where they used Gospel Hymns. My
companions sang fairish well consider
ing the businesses they had followed
for years.
On our way up the coast, one day the
boat stopped at small town. near the
dock of which was a curio-StOre which
got" the Montana man, who had d
large roll and a laundering to collect
things. My friend the brewer called my
attention to a small one-story white
frame building near the dock over the
door of which was a large black-let-
tered sign spelling R-E-W-E-R-Y.''
Come on said he. Tets go over and
examine this fellows plant" Chicago
said it was as complete a plant as so
small one could possibly be; that
the brewer an Austrian, knew his
business to It. that the ten barrels a
month which he made and retailed him.
self at ten cents per glass (smalD was
small goldmine: and that the
goods were exceptionally fine: with
all of which I agreed, especially the
latter-the only thing I knew anything
about anyhow.
Nothing very remarka BILE about any
of the foregoing, is there?-but wait
a minute.
About a month after leaving Sitka.
on my return trip, 1 sailed from San
Francisco, going south. On that steam
er I picked up acquaintance with
gentleman who seemed to to be
looking for someone to talk with. Upon
exchanging cards, he said. "Ah, Smith,
from Kansas: l have relatives in that
state
When l real his card. I remarked,
Possibly I know your relatives, or
some of them, as l know a gentleman
in Topeka of your name; he is the
Episcopal bishop of Kansas-Bishop
Millspaugh.''
DO you know Frank r. Millspaugh,
bishop OF Kansas" he asked seemingly
very much surprised.
slightly said /, but most of my
folks are his sheep
is that So!' asked ne; well, ne S a
cousin of mine.
l then told of my ex-brewer friend
and his bishop cousin-Bishop Vail,
when he remarked, "A most extraor-
binary coincident.'
Well, now, honest Injun, wasn't it?
On this trip, between my arrival
and final departure from San Francis
co, was a period of about two weeks.
We took sidetrips from San Francis
co. 1 first put up at the Palace no.
tel. ! got done" by one of their ton
serial artists to the tune of IS cents
for a face-and-neck shave. Once was
enough for me. Immediately across the
cross-street was a barber shop run by
human beings. They acquired my trade.
During all the time l was in San Fran
cisco l met only four persons whom
I had ever seen before. / met them at
different times, one at a time, during
my two weeks sojourn in that city,
and each and every last mothers son
of them on the walk in front of that
barber shop, on a space not to exceed
20 feet square. All four of them l had
formerly known in Topeka. They were
MI. c. n. Beal, formerly in the money
loaning business here; Mr.. Littlefield,
of the A. T. & s. F. railroad law de-
partment; Mr.. Allen B. Lemon, former
superintendent of public instruction for
the state of Kansas, and a Mr.. Town
send, Louisville. KY, travelling man,
who represented line of merchandise
that a good many of our best citizens
would like to keep out of Kansas
wasn't that a bit remarkable, too?
But about the most ''extrawdny"
of all the occurrences that occurred
on my whole out west trip-and I've
never ceased wondering thereat-is that
l fished one whole day at Santa Cata-
lima Island. and never got biteI
Another queer thing that happened to
me on that island was when, after
writing a letter in the writing room
of the Hotel .Metropole in Avalon. l.
laid my fountain pen down and step
ped to the desk not over ten feet
away for d nickel's worth of postage
stamps. and found upon my return
to the table that the glorious climate
of California" had caused my pen to
evapOratei The only man anywhere
near. a large and seemingly very strong
man. said. 7 never seen it" Nor have
I-Since-