Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1913-10-06
6be
Home Maker
EDITED BY
ALICE f. TALCOTT.
Democracy in the Home.

family and makes it the family god,
compelling the rest of the children to
give up desires, pleasures, food,
clothes, to bear scolding and repres-
sion constantly, while mothers or
fathers special pet has only to eX-
press a wish to drive all the rest of
che family to insure it's satisfaction;
this sort of thing makes any home
purgatory to a sensitive child.
Why is this so? Simply because
every child is born democrat, and
the inherent democracy of the child
is never sufficiently remembered,
though the child asserts it often
enough. 81 am as good as you" is
not only the constant assertion but
the undying belief of every child,
and the child who fails to be treated
with equal respect with other chill
dren nurses a grudge against the
offender The parent who persists in
such partiality destroys the self-re-
spect of the one who is sighted, and
that means ruin at last. Just as long
as the mother can keep active a
sense of honor and self-respect in
child's mind and heart, the child will
increase in moral worth, and every
wise mother will endeavor to stimu-
late the child's desire to deserve
praise, which, bestowed at each visi-
BILE struggle that the child makes to
he good, acts as a constant stimulant
10 virtue and merit.
A FavOrite Boy.
While the partially of parents for
one child is carried to extremes, it
has in it the possibility of ruin for
ALL and the certainty of misery to
many. Here is one case that is at
present showing it's painful sequel.
Both parents agreed that one boy of
theirs had better brains and brighter
prospects in consequence than had
either of his brothers, therefore he
must have the best chance selected
for him, even though this better op-
portunity was purchased by the par
tial sacrifice of all the rest. The lad
seemed to justify their decision by
his ability, and very naturally, as he
grew to understand the meaning of
the plan, worked with all his heart to
insure its adoption. The immediate
result was the loss of love and peace
in the family; the other four chill
dren felt deep sense of wrong, and
believed that all his privileges were
purchased at their expense. AS the
boy grew towards manhood the hard
feelings increased until the father
said that he hated to enter the house,
and therefore kept out OF it as much
as possible. The atmosphere of dis
content and bitterness was as definite
as heat and cold, and his preference
for a quieter place was not to be
wondered at. At eighteen years of
age the eldest daughter of the family
insisted upon marrying a worthless
fellow. The two other boys left
home as soon as they saw a chance
to escape, while at home one younger
daughter and her mother maintain
perpetual warfare over the family
pet. At 22 years of age he lives at
home on the best that can be given
him, always dresses WELL behaves
himself properly and read ands talks
very nicely; he passes from'one situ-
alton to another because he cannot
bear the discipline Of either store or
office, and shuns the drudgery of
study necessary for any of the pro-
fessions. The mother persists in her
devotion, while the father is begin
ming to assert that he has white
elephant on his hands. This is the
existing condition of the family.
The Reign Of Law.
In this family every result could
have been predicted with certainty
by any good psychologist, had the
process been foreseen. Accidents
never happen in the moral realm;
law is absolute. Children reason
with almost infallible accuracy in
some of the domains of life; even if
they see superior ability in a sister
or brother they cannot see in that
difference a claim to greater parent
al affection, and they reason very
Justly. One beautiful instructive
trait will assert itself in nearly all
( lilies at least in all that have the
elements of religion in the home;
that IL one brother or sister Is weak
and sick or afflicted in any manner
TIE others will, of their own voli
tion, insist that the helpless shal
enjoy all of loves kindly ministries;
over and over again / have seen this
and it has made my heart sing with
joy.
Then II is also in harmony will
the moral law that those who arr
pampered during the years of deyel
opment shall lack self-reliance; thu
.u.-o.tto rouar orou-c into N otata1,