davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
What the Other Fellows Say

It is estimated in round figures that the American public pays between twenty-five and thirty millions of dollars annually for theatrical amusements. The enterprise which is responsible for this enormous expenditure represents an in- vested capital of more than four times this amount of money. At least SI2o,- GOO. .ooo is represented in theatrical in vestments in the United States.-New Canaan Advertiser.
 Canada certainly put one across not only on Thaw and his lawyers but on the United States, when it showed the undesirable alien over the border. Xvi dently red tape has no standing with those higher up among Canadian officials, when they are impatient of it.-Water- bury Republican.
 We begin to wonder who really knows what MT. Mellen's present position is on this New Haven Railroad.- Bristol Press.
 There are four months in this year when in the pronunciation of oyster the r is silent, the same as in clams.-Shore Line Times.
 Paupers in England, oyer 70 years of age, numbered 229ooo seven years ago. This year the number was dwindled to 57,ooo on account of the old pension sys- tenn. A great tribute to worthy law Pittsfeld Eagle.
 Instead of being saved from stray bullet by carrying a Bible over his heart, a Goshen barkeeper was saved from a stroke of lightning by wearing a rubber coat. He was simply stunned by the shock. Saints and sinners, alike should wear rubber coats in. thunder storms.- Waterbury American. 2.
 Although the Sunday papers are get ting bigger and bigger, there seems to be no reason why a man can't get them read in time to go to Sunday evening service.-Hartford Post.
 That Bull Moose flop, which permitted the election of a Republican congress man in Maine, was one of the saddest pieces of news the Democrats have read in many day.-Ansonia Sentinel.
 With a corn crop of something like 7oo,ooo,ooo bushels below that of last year and a cotton crop that leaves much to be desires. good many of our citizens will have less to spend on luxuries and a good many others will have to spend more for ties.-Bridgeport Stand ard
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Papa Dresses The Baby.

Elijah, dear, will you dress Willie this morning? I'm in such hurry, and it won't take you minute or two."
 "Certalnly," replied MT. Bixby cheer fully, "I'd just as soon dress the little chap as not. Here my little man, come and let papa dress you. I'll have you as neat as pin in jiffy."
 Willie, aged |, comes reluctantly from his playthings and Bixby begins.
 "Now, let's off with your mighty gown and keep still, dear or I can't unbutton it. There, now, sit still, child. What makes you squirm around like an eel? Where's your little shirty? Ah. here it is, and-sit still Put up your arm-no, the other one, and-can't you keep still half second? Put up your other arm and stop hauling and pulling so. Now, let's-come here, boy. What do you mean by racing off like that with noth- ing on but your shirt? Now come here and let me put the rest of your clothes on. Stand still, I say. Put your leg in here. Not that leg There you go, squirming around like a worm, man, I'll-stop pulling at that chair, and here, Mary Ellen, you'll have to dress this wr1ggling animal yourself. couldn t do it in ten years. Go to your mother, sir P'-Exchange.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
A Story With A Moral.

Rose Pastor Stokes will be remem- bered by most Republican readers as the New York garment. worker who distiu- guished herself by philanthropic work among the poor, but did not gain much attention from the world at large until she married into the opulent Stokes family.
 Mrs. Stokes is socialist. She believes that the woes of society are largely cans ed by the oppression of capital and that wrongdoers are to be pitied rather than punished. In hotel in Lima, Ohio, the other day she discovered that her purse. containing a considerable sum of money was missing. A bellboy was charged with the theft, but Mrs. Stokes proceed ed to apply her benevolent creed to the case and declined to prosecute. The boy, you see, was an oppressed victim. She did not go quite so far as the priest did when Jean Valjean stole the can dlesticks and say she gave the boy the purse, so that he most have suffered under considerable suspicion.
 While these event were passing a brakeman of the O.. H. & D. found the purse and turned it over to the proper officials, He found it in the car where Mrs. Stokes left it, and in due course it was returned to her. The moral of this simple tale would seem to be that where an innocent person is suspected of crime it is his right and his privilege to have the case substituted to the duly constitut- ed courts in the ordinary way.-St. Louis Republican.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
"To Be Happy Though Married" |"

A man who is described as "a wealthy resident of Seattle and associate of J. J. Hill" has produced certain rules for happiness in married life. They are addressed to husbands, and what his wealth or his friendship with MT. Hill has to do with the case is not explained. Here are the rules:
 Keep all promises made before and at the time of marriage.
 Divide the newspaper and everything else.
 Keep joint bank account.
 Go to your club no oftener than one night week.
 Have no dogs or pets of any kind.
 Call her up on the telephone at least three times day.
 When away from home write or tele- graph every day.
 Take her with you on business and pleasure trips. Ro more polite to her than to any other woman you meet.
 Remember that she likes flowers, candy and books.
 Make 1t a business to be comfortable whenever she is happy.
 Don't criticise her dress.
 Be gentleman to all women, but a husband to only one.
 If you have only dollar you are not wasting 1t by spending it on her.
 If you have been faithful in all things, generous, considerate and loving and still she is dissatisfied, get divorce.
 Life Is too short to waste any of it Tn trying to please an abnormal woman, " MT. Dillman adds.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
GOSSIP OF DAYS GONE BY
Record of Doings from Week to Week CulIed from The News Files.
 IQRo

Record of Doings from Week to Week
 CulIed from The News Files.
 1882.
 February s. "Walt Hatch, of Kent, spent few days last week with Friend Northrup."
 Frank VanDeusen has swapped for big grey horse said to be bang-up road ster."
 "Frank A. Peet has sold his farm near Falls Village, to Frank Reed, of Corn wall, for $roooo."
 Mrs. Henny Hanchett was entertain ing her sister, Miss Stella Millspaugh, of Falls Village.
 The I. D. D. Y. dance was attended by the largest crowd in its history, guests coming from Winsted, Norfolk. Falls Village and Ashley Falls. Bub Whites orchestra furnished music.
 MT. Isaac Lermond was sick with pneumonia.
 Byron Dibble, of Wetaug, died of pneumonia, after a weeks sickness. Aged 47 years.
 A heavy snowstorm Saturday night and Sunday blockaded the railroads and made the roads impossible. Snowplows on the Conn. Western required two engines 10 shove them through.
 "The Methodist society's ice house on Pine Grove camp ground has been filled with about 30 tons of ice, to keep the | saints and sinners cool next August" L. D. filling, of Canaan Valley, butch cred pig 337 days old, that weighed 43I pounds.
 "Harry Sedgwick was in town yester- day and made Milton Roraback agent for | Bakers celebrated fertilizers"
 A sleigh-load of guests from this vil- lage attended a party given by Miss Siddie Crocker, at East Canaan. They went up drawn by Warmers stylish | team"
 "Rev. Mir. Mackey, whose third year as pastor of the Methodist church is | drawing to close, will leave April I. The society can hope for nothing better | than a successor who will be as jealous worker as he has been and is" The Village Improvement Association gave a successful sociable and oyster supper.
 James Garrahan was spending the win ter in Pueblo, Col.
 Landlord Macdonald was the lucky winner of silver pitcher at the Catholic fair, Mir. Frank Tone, of East Canaan being a close second. The pitcher brought the church $24o, and MT. Mac Donald's majority was $36. Mrs. George H. Parmelee lost her pocketbook, containing jewelry and $2s in money. It was found by Frank Jones, of the Watson farm, who promptly re- stored it to its owner.
 Falls Village-John H. Belden had so far recovered from his illness as to be able to be removed to his fathers house. John $. Lane sold his real estate on Pros pect street to Samuel w. Bradley. "Eighty-three tons of pig. iron was made at the smelling furnace at Lower City last week." A grand soiree was given in the new addition to the Lime Rock depot, under the auspices of the Episco- pal ladies.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Pa" corbIn on the Field.

The Hartford Courant thus refers to distinguished member of the Bald Head Club of America:
 Pa" Corbin-in everyday life Tax Commissioner William Corbin, but "Pa" whenever his football record Is spoken of or when he steps foot on the Yale campus-was in New Haven Saturday, and rode out to Yale field to watch the practice of the pridiron performers upon whom Old Eli will pin her hopes this fall. When Pa" Corbin was seen with a group of graduates rumor spread rapidly that he was to join the coaching staff. but he denied the story and said that he ohanced to be in New Haven and could not resist the inclination to go out and see how the embryo football stars were getting alongi in their early practice.
 The star of former days declined to comment upon the squad after he had watched the practice beyond saying that there were lot of husky youngsters in ths bunch. He said that the practice was entirely rudimentary, and it was hard to make predictions from watching the men for a short time. That |" Pa !" Corbin is hopeful for Yale success this season goes without saying.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

The New Canaan Messenger assures it's readers that it's creditors are acting decently and friends continue to send encouraging messages, which bring us new inspiration for our daily task, and lead us to believe that it will be possible for us to weather the present financial scorm, and so re-organize the business side of the enterprise as to make possible the continuation of its long career" Good! The old Messe nger deserves to live great many years longer.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Letters From the People
Harris's Pet Eagles.
To the Editor of The News:

To the Editor of The News:
 This time I wish to tell your readers about a pair of pets had when l was boy, and I don't think there are many people that ever had such unusual pets. This was before the Civil War. I lived in Salisbury, Conn, at the time, near the Twin Lakes. A schoolmate of mine Albert Williams by name, was hunting on a mountain. and on some high crag or ledge he discovered a golden headed eagles nest, with pair of young eagles in it. He captured them and brought them home, but for some reason he did not care to keep them. so he gave them to me. I clipped their wings and let them run about the yard. They were handsome birds and was proud of my pets. They had white fluffy feathers, all but spot on top of their heads as big as silver dollar, which was a bright gold color. They were quite curiosity to people who saw them. They would catch mice, birds, etc. and were fond of fish. but they were always fighting each other I think they were both male birds. They fought so fiercely that at last one killed the other. and as I failed to keep his mates wings clipped he flew away that fall and left me. I never saw him more. Chas. A. Harris.
 Two Harbors, Minn.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Where the Laugh Comes In
Plain waters bad enough, hope,
 But soapsuds taste so mean ;- I wish they'd make some candy soap
-Woman's Home Companion,

10 keep our IhC6S Cl6du
 -Woman's Home Companion.
 Miss Summer board-"Have you mo- ticed what delightful air this is? Why, it absolutely intoxicates one"
 Cleverton-"H-m It ought Joo They charge champagne prices. ."-Puck
 What's the trouble, old man?"
 "I'm ill a bad way lieawake nights thinking about my work. Then when I'm at work l keep going to sleep. "- Kansas City Journal.
 "So you want back your presents?"
 At once." declared the girl.
 "Well, here's your photograph and your lock of hair. These embroidered suspenders 1 shall have to mall to you" Buffalo Commercial.
 "I," she said. "can trace my ancestry back to armor and shirts of mail"
 Il started to trace my ancestry pack once," he replied, but my wife made me stop when got to shirt sleeves and overalls. ."-Buffalo Commercial
 II don't know what to do to collect a crowd" said the street salesman. My old methods are all getting too familiar ]"
 Nothing is easier," replied MT. Chug- gins. "If you want to collect crowd, simply pretend that your automobile is broken and that you are going to try to fix it. Washington Star.
 Ut is hard for me to have to live in the past" announced the melancholy man who had retired from business.
 "Yes but often it is harder to live down the past. Buffalo Express.
 "That's the instructor in cookery"
 ''Ah Is she practical cook?"
 Practical? Well, guess She could cook in a hotel if she chose. Why she knows 24 distinct names for bread pud- ding P'-Puck.
 Vlncent-"The new woman seems in- clined to smoke I wonder if she Il swear also"
 Mrs. Votleigh-"Oh no she intends to run things so we'll there won't be any thing to swear at. "-Boston Transcript,
 Dibbs--" -"Going to marry Why I thought you intended to remain single"
 Gibbs-"Well. I did t; but I met a young woman who had decided to re- main single also, and finding such har- mony of disposition in each other, we determined to get married. ''-Exchange.
 If I were poor would you be as eager to marry me as you are now?"
 "Every bit, my dear, but we might have to postpone our wedding for year or two. ."-Detroit Free Press.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

The Pittsfield Eagle records this aston ishing occurrence in Great Harrington "When the orchestra in the Mahaiwe theatre at Great Burlington struck up The Star Spangled Banner at a theat- rical production the other night. the only persons in the audience to stand up were two young girls, the daughters of Jewish parents. Strange to say another young woman born ln this country, and a grad. uate of high school, turned to her es- cort and wanted to know why the two girls " ere standing P'
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Homer eYInRton Promoted.


 Says Norwalk correspondent of the Bridgeport Standard: The many Norwalk friends of Homer M. Byington, formerly United States Consul at Leeds. England, will read with pleasure of his reappoint- ment to the Consular service by Presi- dent Wilson on Wednesday, and of his assignment to the more advantageous post at Bristol. "Young Homer" Bylng. ton as he is still called, first entered the service as secretary to his grandfather, the late A. Homer Byington when his grandfather was appointed as United States Consul to Naples, Italy, by Presi. dent Mckinley and has held responsible positions under the Government ever since. Mrs. Byington and her two child ren are the guests of her father. Dr. J. c. Gregory, at West avenue. Consul Byington is now on his way to join his family for short vacation.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Died on Reunion Dnv.

Major Walter Burnham. n war veteran and during his active business life wide. ly known, died in New Preston Thurs day after an illness of about year. He was veteran of the heavy artillery, which Thursday held it's 18th reunion at Canaan. MT. Burnham was associated years ago with Captain E. w. Marsh at Bridgeport in the manufacture of car. riage springs and hardware and his tray. cling for the firm took him through the west and south. He was about 80 years of age
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Equal Rigts.

Women demand equal rights with men. What does a woman have to wear during the hot days of 1913? One low-necked, sleeveless mosquito netting gown.
 One pair silk stockings.
 One pair of slippers.
 That's all.
 What does a man wear during said hot days?
 One coat.
 One vest.
 One pair trousers.
 One shirt with starched collar. One pair socks.
 One pair shoes.
 One union suit.
 One hat.
 Que pair suspenders. One belt.
 One necktie.
 If he takes his coat off in hot restau- rant he is thrown out. If he takes his tight collar off he's rube. If he wore his trousers slit up the knee he would be sent to the insane asylum. Equal rights? Huh!-Exchange
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
WELL DONE, cANAANI

The successful carrying out of the ar- ond Heavies" in Canaan last Thursday was a matter of pride and qualification to every loyal Canaanite. The verdict of the visiting veterans, themselves, may be accepted as just and impartial. They were unanimous in their expressions of appreciation and voluntarily and enthu- siastically admitted that the Canaan re- union was one cf the most successful and enjoyable in the history of the organ1za- tion, which has attended forty-eight an- nual reunions, and some unhesltatingly declared 1t to have been equal, in mem- orable qualities, to the 50th anniversary reunion in Litchfield, last year, which was considered to be as far as praise need to go, as the Litchfeld meeting was crowning event in the annals of the Sec ond Heavies.
 The local committees entered upon the duties of their various appointments in the proper and winning spirit, evincing, from the outset, determination to make this gathering of the famods old Litch- field county regiment notable success.
 The people of the town, generally, ad- justed themselves to the same mood and responded not only willingly but gladly to the call for financial support, many sending in their subscriptions without solicitation, and voluntarily requesting the committee to call on them for further contribution if there was any danger of deficit.
 The cheerful co operation of the auto mobile owners, for the veterans ''joy ride" around Twin Lakes was pleasing demonstration of the community's gen. erosity and loyal regard for the old sol diers. Thirty automobiles were lined up for the ride which proved one of the most appreciable features of their day in Canaan.
 Everything considered, the reunion of 1913 was an event to be long remembered as demonstration of Canaan's affection ate regard for the old heroes of the Sec ond Heavies, and of Canaan ever-readi- ness to get together and pull together, with good effect, for any worthy object.
 We are proud of Canaan.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
The Sign of Age.

l was youngster yesterday,
 Wearing my sunset hose. Blowing a slice of my weekly pay
 To buy some girl rose. Youthful felt until just now;
 Today things took flop. Just now sport of the rah-rah sort
 Gave hail to me me as Pop" Age comes creeping before you know, That is the common lot. Month by month we older grow
 And yet we feel it not. All of sudden you know that you
 Come of an ancient crop, When a fippant kid with fancy lid
 Alludes to you as "Pop."
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
NORTH CANAAN HAS

population Jf2,17, (census of 191O.) Two railroaus.
 National and Savings Banks. Trolley railroad extending through the Berkshires to Pittsfield and beyond. Up-to-date High School and first-class school system.
 Five churches.
 First class hotel.
 Fire department. including chemical en- zine.
 Ten miles of State Roads Electric light and power plant, Complete Sewer System. Never-failing water supply and the best water in the state.
 Wide-awake Business Mems Association. Extensive lime and iron industries. Fraternl Il anl benefit societies. Brass band.
 Up-to-date department stores. Pure air and wholesome climate.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
Chicken House Cheer.

Take the now-idle tin atomizer which has worked we'll on the potato vines pour some kerosene oil into it. go to the hen house and generously atomize the nests, floors, walls, windows, perches with kerosene-it will be finely dis tributed like vapor. Do this cheap and simple thing once in while and no lice will be your reward.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
TELEPHONE: CANAAN ss
AS AN ADVERTISING MEDIUM

The News should appeal with special force to the sagacious business man.
 It has an extensive circulation in Western Connecticut, and especially throughout Litch- field County and Southern Berkshire.
 It has 8 competent staff of wide-awake cor respondents in the various towns to report the local dongs each week. and goes into the homes and is perused by the entire families of the thrifty, intelligent reading class of people whom the long headed advertiser most desires to reach
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
THURSDAY. SEPTEMBER IS, 1913
Trust in God.

Do not look forward to what might happen tomorrow the same ever- lasting Father who cares for you to- day, will take care of you tomorrow. and every day. Either He will shield ]. you from suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace then, and put aside all anx- ious thoughts and imaginations.- St. Francis de Sales.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

This "victory for Thaw," Jerome scores point" etc., is getting monoto- nous to millions of people who are mighty sick of the whole disgusting Thaw business.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
THE NEWS AGENTS

Extra copies of The News are on sale at the office of publication and at
 Dempsey's Drug Store, Canaan, Post Office, East Canaan. D. H. Oakes' Store. Lakeville, Post Office, Falls Village, George T. Johnson's Store, Norfolk, Scutt & Rood. Ashley Falls. A. L. Dickinson. Salisbury. J. W. Morgan, Great Harrington, Mass.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

"You can't joke with woman. re- mar ked to my wife last night that I wished someone would invent hookless gowns"
 Well, what happened ?"
 "She said my remarks reminded her that there were couple of gownless hooks in her closet. and now I'm in for a laundering big dressmaker's bill. .''- Boston Transcript.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
THE HIDDEN IMPULSE.
BY EMMA RoDEMEYER WATT

Somewhere within each human heart, Though hidden far from view, Nestles a ne'er-ending desire
 For life that's pure and true. But oft we sGrive against ourselves,
 Withholding what we know Would scatter bits of happiness,
 And brighten life below; While if we'd give the impulse rein,
 And to ourselves he true, How much real joy 'twould circulate, And it would bless us, too.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

Get Together. Pull Together. That was what made the soldiers reunion the great success that it was.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

Subscribers are requested to notify the pub i sher promptly of any failure to receive papers regularly, changes of residence etc.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

Secretary D. 0. Kilbourn's comment on the reunion i'll Canaan Had 8 dandy time and the goose hung high.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

Three Canaan residents gathered in by the grim reaper" within three weeks-William J. Ferguson. Mrs. D. w. Manvel and William Waller-all
 highly esteemed and long time residents.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

"What a cut.up that fellow is "
 Quite so he is a medical student. '' American.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

The Hartford Courant's Sunday edi- tion will make it's initial appearance, Sunday, Oct. ,.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
WRITE LETTER ABOUT

Communications on subjects of general inter- est to The News readers are invited, but no attention will be paid to anonymous letters
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18
WANTED
MISCELLANEOUS

FOR RENT-Rooms at rear of Dr. Camps resi
 dence. Suitable for club rooms. dressmaklug, lodging etc Terms reasonable, Possession given September 1, Mrs. c. W. Camp, Canaau.
Connecticut western news., 1913-09-18

AR. PAfrEN, Optistln rorrington, ;oun.
 will be at The JandelI" hotel ths first Mon day and Tuesday afternoons of each month
 If ilnable Co call send postal, Consultation free