davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
.AYHAWKER JOTS

The first circus of the season in
Kansas will alight at Junction City
next week.
The initiative is to be invoked in
Wichita to secure Sunday opening of
the moving picture shows.
The assessor in one Kansas town has
found 663 persons and 143 dogs. These
figures show an average of about a dog
for every family.
The building of the Santa Fe's branch
out of Dodge City is causing the town
to perk up. She will spend $4,000 on
a sewer system this year.
The Thirtieth Annual Convention of
the Kansas Woman Suffrage associa-
ton will be held at Lawrence May 10
and 20. They have the ballot. What
more do they want?
A Crawford county man, says the
Parsons Sun, found a dynamite cap
and after his examination of it the
doctors made an examination of the
man, but failed to find one of his
thumbs and an eye.
If you are married you must be good
or pay additional for your attractions
of the law at Salina. Judge Richard
son announces that any married man
brought before him for being drunk
will be fined twice as heavy as a single
offender.
Hutchinson is going to banquet Iron
Jaw Brown because he was instru-
mental in securing the state fair for
that town. This leads Walt Mason to
remark: "a man with an iron jaw
should do good service at a Hutchin-
son banquet"
The following from the Leavenworth
Post shows how an emergency has been
met: Those who like to drink real
beer out of real schooners at real bar
viii soon he able to do so by crossing
the river. The jointists seem to be
about to give up the fight against the
attorney general"
Out in the Sixth congressional dis
trict there is some talk of running
Conner Davies, editor of the Concordia
Kansan, for congress, on the Progress
sive ticket. Old Conner is all 'balled
up politically, but might make a good
congressman. Because a man has no
political sense is no sign he hasn't
common sense.-Atchison Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
FUEL SHORTAGE FAR OFF.


Following the report of investigators
in the Kansas and Oklahoma fields
comes William Griffith, famous geolo-
gist and mining expert, and, testify
ing as a witness in court case, de-
clares that there is still in the ground
in the United States $500. 600, 000, 600
tons of coal, or enough to supply us
for the next 5000 years at the present
rate of consumption.
Thus far there has been consumed
in the United States four-tenths of 1
per cent of the total supply" testified
Mr.. Griffith.
On top of all this he said that when
We used up what We had in this coun-
try, providing the Eastern coal grab
bers allow us to use it, there will be
still enough coal in Alaska to keep us
going for an additional $500 years.
Commenting on this statement the
st. Paul Dispatch says:
Every few minutes for the past
dozen years We have been warned that
the coal supply is rapidly giving out
and that surely by the following winter
the people will be burning corn husks.
There is a suspicion in some quarters
that coal concerns have fostered this
neat deception to make people feel that
any rate the people have believed the
rumors and taken it for granted that
coal was on the point of giving out"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
A MODERN LlEONIDAs.

The story of Leonidas and his band
of 300 Spartans who stood at the noun
tain pass and when the Persian king
demanded that they give up their arms
replied: Come and take them" is
familiar to all readers of ancient his
tory. Something similar is being en-
acted today and not far from the same
spot.
All Europe is demanding that King
Nicholas, of Montenegro, give up
Scutari, the prize of a hard won vic
tory. Like the Greek general Of old
he says: Come and put me out"
Whatever the outcome of his defiant
attitude he will win the applause and
the sympathy of the world.
Backed by the smallest nation in
Europe he challenges the big DULLES
to do their worst. While they are ap-
parently united against her, yet in the
event of a clash of arms, she may find
friends. and it would not be surprising
If a general war should follow an
attempt by Austria. single handed to-
crush her If what is termed the con-
cert of the powers should be broken
I'D it would result probably in line
up of Russia, England and France
against Austria, Germany and Italy,
and many old scores might be settled.
The whole continent is perllously
near again becoming one big battle
field, such as it was in the time OF
Napoleon Bonaparte.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
GLOBE SIGHTS
BY THE ATCHISON GLOBE.

Janitor work in a small town isn't.
Young men stick together better than
older ones.
There is no use to whine If you don't
win your first race.
There is many an idea that is far better
than the man behind it,
4 man doesn't care SO much for elabo-
rate refreshments if there is plenty to eat.
A man who commenced figuring at
forty retiring from business never got
very far into it.
1t is said of an Atchison girl that she
has such q sweet voice that when she
sings she draws flies.
Soon be time for the sweet girl grad
yates to arise and give the new admin
istration a few pointers.
There used to be a good many "hoss
Doctors before the veterinarians put
them out of business.
Short jerks: II have little use for an
cestors. See what Adam and Eve did TO
us, when they cut out vaudeville and
closed the park"
There is nothing about an Atchison
mans kin that he can be proud of, so he
boasts of the number of deaths that have
occurred in the family.
Say what you please about being charit-
a ble and broad the ice cold facts are.
you have eyes as sharp as hawks and
use them, too, and unless a persons be-
havior is exemplary that person is
..talkenI about.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
POINTED PARAGRAPHS
IFrom the Chicago News.1

Some of the fair sex are most unfair.
Don't be too polite to grab an oppor-
tunity.
If you are fond of jokes read the Con-
gressional Record.
If worst comes to worst it's best to
make the best of it.
Men who can be bought imagine that
they can't be caught.
The deserving poor are usually those
who don't deserve to be.
Consolation can be found in the die
tionary, but it is an inferior variety.
The man who tried to kick his way to
popularity learned better after while.
You never hear a chauffeur complain
that he has been working like a horse.
If a man is too proud to beg and too
honest to steal, what business has he in
politics?
Whine young man may admire a kit
tenish girl, he should remember that kit
tens grow up.
After a spinster has married she may
discovery that she merely drew a conso-
lation prize.
OF course, experience is valuable, but
nearly every man you meet is willing to
swap some for money.
We once met a woman who was such
slave to fashion that she was even willing
to work for her clothes.
When man begins to shout his virtues
from the housetop his neighbors proceed
to sit up and take unfavorable notice.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
QUAKER MEDTTATIONS.
[From the Philadelphia Record.l


Wisdom always knows when to quit
Most of US get what We deserve, but
only the successful will admit it.
Tact is the art of making other people
think they know more than you do.
The average man feels that he could
bear our burdens much better than his
own.
A woman saves money for a rainy day
in order that she may buy silk hosiery
1t sometimes seems as though the fool
killer must have given up his job in dis
gust.
Some fellows divide their time between
being roasted and being kept in hot wa
ter.
Any girl will tell you she would rather
be rich mans widow than poor mans
wife.
1t isn't always because fellow is fond
of geology that he tries to marry the girl
with the rocks.
The sweetest music in the world is a
duet played upon the horn of plenty and
the trumpet of fame.
Newlywed-"Why have you never taken
a better half?" Oldbach-'I don't believe
in doing things by halves"
Sillicus-"Do you believe reform really
makes the world any better?' Cynicus-
Well. it makes it more uncomfortable.
Pride goeth before fall quoted the
Wise Guy Yes and it doesn't soften the
bumps any. at that" added the Simple
Mug.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
BY TIE WAY
BY HARVEY PARSONS.

kansas University student lawyers
are going to try Hamlet. The charge
TO be preferred has not been announc-
ed, but we suspect, from what we have
seen or Hamlet, that it will be dis
orderly conduct specifically, wander
ing through a boneyard without his
trousers.
1t was ST Louis preacher who
proved his brotherly love by kissing
the best looking married woman of
his flock. But because he didn't pass
1T around, the rest of the women of
ms church demand his resignation.
w h1ch goes to prove that preacher
should not discriminate, lest he be
ditched under the antitrust laws.
Foreign nations cheerfu1ly admit
that the right thing to do with the
Panama ditch is to make it free to all.
The fact that the Panama ditch cost
something like 400 millions does not in
the least worry foreign nations who
did not have to contribute. Under
the circumstances, they should worry
and get wrinkles if they think the
Panama ditch is a donation scheme.
Socialists are viewing with alarm
one Harry Bone of Topeka and Ash
land. They feel that he hath har-
pooned certain members of the Sacred
Cult and should be Gained forthwith,
or possibly, a few minutes before
that 1t is merely another example of
Harry'S carelessness. He neglected to
find out whether or not the violators
were sacred before prosecuting them.
There are several ways of getting a
rise out of a woman. One is to tell
her on the street that her dress is I'M
hooked in the back, but some boys on
new York subway train found a bet
ter way. They uncanned a herd of
mice.
X. U. girls in solemn conclave, have
decided that they want husbands with
80 IL waist measures. A husband with
that waist measure would be handy to
have around when wifie's fiddle
strings break, but otherwise
Add K. U.-Some schools of Jour
nalism may teach piffle-many of
them so do; but the name of the K.
U. school of Journalism should be
changed to THE State School of Prac-
teal Newspaper Work. The Univer-
sity Kansan is one of the cleanest,
best edited, best written little dailies
in the state, and it's entire construction
depends upon students.
Journalism" is a good word that
has fallen into bad repute through
misuse-like the word progressive"
The poor we have with us always
but we must remember that many of
the rich are close-danged close.
But maybe that's the way they got
rich.
The boy who can keep a white waist
clean four hours doesn't amount to
much, and never will.
Is the daily death of some aviator"
in the last form? Very we'll. Let the
sheet go to press. THIRTY.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
KANSAS COMMENT

AMENDING THE CONSTITUTION.
There appears to be merit in Sena-
tor LaFollettes resolution for the sub
mission of an amendment to the con-
stitution changing the method of
amending that instrument. The reso-
luton provides that if the legislatures
of ten states shall ask submission of
an amendment it must be submitted
and that all amendments shall be rati-
fled by vote of the people instead of
by legislatures This method of
amending the federal constitution
would avoid the long delays some
times experienced in getting desired
amendments before the people, delays
caused by the unwillingness of congress
to submit the amendment. If there is
sufficient demand for it to induce ten
legislatures to ask for 1t then the peo-
pie ought to have a chance at it. The
provision that amendments shall be
ratified by the people direct appears
all right, also. 1t checks the amend
ment right up to the voters and would
cause them to discuss the matter and
become more familiar with 1t. This
method might cause even more delay
In the ratification of an amendment
than is now experienced but the gov
eminent probably would not suffer be-
cause of the delay. We have done
pretty well all these years without
these amendments and can wait a year
or two more. The amendment of our
fundamental law is something that
ought not to be proceeded with in
undue haste.-Leavenworth Times.
%
KANSAS AGAIN LOSER.
Another of the leading men of the
University of Kansas is lost to the
state, one of the strongest and best
OF the workers. man whose re-
searchers and the results he has at
tanned had made him famous Pro-
fessor Bushong is a practical man, a
man who gets results, and whose
contributions to the world of prac-
teal work have been of the highest
value. Such men as he the indus
trial world is looking for, and is
ready to pay what their services are
worth. Kansas all these years has
been, and still is, training men for 9TH
er schools and other states, and as
soon as they prove their worth, KAN
sas loses them, for she has failed ut
terly in keeping them. Year by year
Kansas loses to other states because
we refuse to recognize the worth of
these men, and because we have fail
ed to lay properly the foundation for
the support of the university. No one
in particular is to blame; the whole
state is at fault. And as long as our
present system stands, so long will we
lose our most valuable and most use
full men. 1t is a hard blow to the
institution to lose in one year such
men as Hoad, McClunS, Carruth, anu
now Bushong, but there are others,
and unless we change our methods,
we may not hope to retain them We
could name some, however, whose de-
parture would not harm the university
in the least.-Lawrence Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
Turning Him Down.

He was a theatrical lover, and she
didn't like his style in the least, for
he was constant in his devotion, which
made matters worse She had tried
gentle means to get rid of him, but he
had disregarded them with painful
persistency.
Dear one" he exclaimed, hurting
himself tragically at her feet, ct love
you! My life is yours! Will you take
If 7''
She did not look like a murderess,
but she responded, with calm deter
mination:
II will"
He gazed at her rapturously.
Don't do that" she begged, draw
ing back from him as if in horror. 81
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
HVAEOR OF TIE DAY

do you think that your son has any
ambitions to be merchant prince?' NO:
Wit. Ine profits of a middle-man."-Bu
falo Express.
How on earth did Mrs Millyuns ever
b,1v her way into society? With her
money! with that and tact" 'Tact?
Yes She always lost at bridge."-Bal-
timore American.
ST say, Tom, lend me another ten viii
your" 'Heavensi Why don't you go to
work and earn money!" Don't dare to,
NV boy. People would think the governor
had disinherited me, and that would rum
my credit. Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
THE oFFICEsEEKERs

1 am the Office seeker,
1 flatter and I smirk,
/ want a soft position;
do not like to work.
I've done naught for my country,
1 never went to war;
But it owes me a living
That's what a country's for.
1t matter not what party
Wins out and takes the game,
think that I'm entitled
To some job, just the same.
I'm always in the forefront
And that the bet that's best.
OF course there may be others,
But I'm the champion pest.
Roy K. Moulton.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

have taken YOU life, as you requested
me to do, and you are henceforth to
all intents and purposes dead"
He seemed dazed.
81 do not" she continued, turning
aside, desire to have a dead person
in the house, and if you do not go
away at once I shall send for an I'M
nearest cemetery
Then the dreadful precipitation in
which his own precipitate folly had
placed him was revealed, and he re-
moved himself with promptness and
diSpatch.-Tit-B Bits.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
Caught on the Fly.

A Missouri woman has traded her
husband for mule. The husband is
probably satisfied even if the mule
isn't.
The secretary of agriculture has
60,000.000 seeds to distribute. But
there will not be enough to go around,
as there are 100000 of us.
Turkey has the uncomfortable hab-
it of keeping right on fighting long
after she is whipped.
Report says the stock market is
holding up well. Yes, and holding up
everybody.
A New York theatrical man is adj
vertising for the most beautiful wom-
an in the world, which, by the way, is
one of the easiest ways to get into a
lot of trouble.
Champ Clark's well known sense of
humor absolutely refuses to work
when any one mentions Mr.. Bryan.
LaFollette says the country needs a
surgical stateman. Yes, indeed, one
who can cut out lot of things.
Life is hardly going to be worth
living when the mail-carrying aero
planes begin dropping those heavy
mail-order house catalogues on us.
A Georgia man has invented a seed
less watermelon, but the genius is yet
to arrive who will invent one with a
handle.
A revolution has just been started
in Ecuador, from which fact it may
be considered that conditions there
have returned to normal.
man tired of paying alimony
leaped into the Hudson river, which
was the most important plunge he had
taken since he plunged into the sea of
matrimony.
New Zealand is rapidly acquiring
civilization. Parliament adjourned the
other day to see a baseball game.
While they are trying to decide who
was the first Wilson man. it is safe
to say that Woodrow was.
A man with a wooden leg is walk
ing around the world. He will prob
ably make it If he keeps pegging
awap
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

the superintendent of the Pittsburg
public schools was acquitted of a seri-
Gus charge by a jury the other day,
but not by public opinion. The evil
dence at the trial pointed strongly to
bis guilt. As a consequence the pupils
of the Pittsburg schools have gone on
a strike and refuse to attend school
unless he be discharged.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
ON THE SPUR
or THE MOMENT
BY ROY X. MOULTON.
ROY X. MOULTON.

Luck.
All nevah cotched a train on time.
All nevah won a single dime.
Eff diamonds fell out OBJ de sky,
Aid sho'ly be in Jail.
Nobody hands no flowahs to me,
An ct am very plain to see,
De only word what fits nah case
am jes' dis yere one, Fail"
Alive had mos every known disease;
Alive neveh had no chance TO- ease.
All has to wo'k six days a week or
stahve to def, OATS all.
No easy graft comes long nah way
Fo' what All gifts, All has to pay.
All never has a cent laid up when
ct comes long tow'd fall.
Dere amt no luck To- dis yere coon.
All might as well call TO de moon;
But still, dere am one happy thought
what makes me feel less blue.
While All am mournin' of nah lot,
An thinkin' what All hasn't got,
De same applies to jes' about mos
everybody, too.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The case OF the 14-year-boy who
murdered his benefactor and her two
children, seems to point out that some of
the effort put forth in saving the good
boys might we'll be directed toward
the bad ones
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The ID. A. r. convention went. on
record as favoring the restoration of
the army caEteen. And yet the LIQUOR
interests are charged with defeating
woman suffrage in Michigan.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Texas is suing the Standard Oil COM
pany for $100O0,0O0. As Texas will
undoubtedly notify US when she gets
st, we can go on in our customary way
without undue excitement
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Another way in which Senator
Thompson differs from Vice President
Marshall, is that he did< not consign
himself to oblivion on taking office.
The advertising he is getting just now
would be worth a fortune to an opera
star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

A decided improvement in strikes is
shown by recent events in Belgium.
The amount of disorder appears to
decrease in proportion to the number
Of persons involved. There was more
bloodshed and destruction of property
resulting from street railway strike
in Buffalo than appeared in all Bel
Rium.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The efforts of Austria to induce
Montenegro to scoot out of Scutari so
far have not been prolific of results.
About the only thing left to do seems
TO be to throw her out
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The Democratic party in China is
called the Kuo Ming Tang. But the
Democratic party in this country has
been called worse names than that
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The day may yet come when no wild
west show will be considered complete
without tribe of ferocious suffragists
from London's far West End.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

New Jersey must take a back seat
in the future. An exploring party in
the arctic regions reports finding mos
quitoes as big as silver dollars.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

A good many people are supposed
to like dandelion greens. But the man
who owns a lawn doesn't.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Policyholders will doubtless infer that
it is indiscreet to put the canary cages
in the chicken coop when expecting
the house to burn down.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Considering his limitations, Paul
Revere did very well indeed. But
think what he could have done with
a motorcycle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Suffra gists in England are reported
to have torn up a cricket field. Next
thing we know, they will be breaking
up the cricket tea things.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

As we understand Speaker Clark, he
regrets the events at Baltimore as
much as Secretary Bryan does, If not
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The next chief of the weather bureau
will do we'll to install a Seismog ra ph
to advise him of approaching disturb
anceS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Worcester, Mass, boasts that it con-
sumes 10000 doughnuts annually. And
here a large number of people have
been wondering what was the matter
with Worcester.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Secretary Bryan is just as ready to
tell California what laws not to enact
as if he had never heard of imperial
ism
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

the state Journal is a member Of the
Associated Press and receives the IolI oay
sanitation for the exclusive AFTERNOON
publication in Topeka
The news is received In The state Jour-
mai building over wires for this sole pur-
pose
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Suffolk county, Massachusetts,. has
an official who is deaf and dumb. 1t
is safe to say that he is not a bull
moose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

The roar of the crowd when the
home team loses is denominated: THE
call of the wild" by the Omaha Bee.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

prominent senator says he under
stands the tariff thoroughly. Then he
is evidently out of place in the senate.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

AS an automobile salesman Mr.. Cobb
will doubtless develop decided objec-
tons to protruding spikes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-04-26

Kansas University student lawyers
are going to try Hamlet. The charge
TO be preferred has not been announc-
ed, but we suspect, from what we have
seen of Hamlet, that it will be dis
orderly conduct specifically, wander
ing through a boneyard without his
trousers