Williams news., 1913-05-10
Confessions of
 a Tourist

Half the time in travelling one is dragged at such breakneck speed from one point of interest to another that one hasn't time to button ones shoes. The other half of the time one goes nearly mad from enforced inactivity. Our two weeks in Japan was one frenzied flash of sightseeing, at which we worked twelve hours a day. Charles was obsessed with a grim de. termination to "do" all that was to be done. At the end of the third day was perfectly willing to take for granted every other Shinto temple and cherry tree and stone lantern in Japan. Not until the ninth day did the worm turn. I had been trying to hint tactfully for some time that 12 hours a day of steady sightseeing was no more enjoyable than 12 hours a day of steady feasting, that one needed time in between to assimilate impress sions; but my subtleties fell on deaf ears.
 The eighth night we passed in a Japanese sleeper, complicated form of torture not easily described. We dragged ourselves out at 6:30 in the | morning after sleepless night of tor. | ment, and began our weary round oi | sightseeing. It was at 6:30 that even. | ing that the worm, which was I, turn. ed.
 was hungry, tired, cold, wretched.
 bedraggled, with every nerve crying out for shelter; a hot bath, clean | al hod ba xxyird iaI, of | all times blows bleak and dust laden in Japan, had been tugging all day at
 my hat and hair. When Charles said
 we would now visit the Sacred Island
 replied:
 "We will do no such thing. We will
 now go back to the; hotel and have | dinner and go to bed"
 And we did.
 We are now on shipboard, five days
 out from Yokohama, with the usual | contrast of nothing to do except criti- else our fellow-passengers. Some time I am going to write a | realistic account of Japan to offset the linnumerab1e sentimental accounts that are in circulation. The first reve- lation shall make is the fact, which | the Lafcadio Hearn enthusiasts all ig.
 nore or overlook, that 97 per cent of
 the Japanese populace have colds in their heads and snif1e.
 The usual sentimental gush, as you
 know, is this: ''What wonderful lit tie people the Japanese are! You
 know, they don't heat their houses;
 the bathe all the year around in the
 open air, and they wear the same clothes summer and winter!" They do. And they all sniffle. | I will try to explain the Japanese
 idea of physical comfort. You arrive at Japanese hotel for luncheon. The
 smiling proprietor and his staff greet you with dozen bows apiece and in- drawing of their breaths. You are
 ushered into a frigid mausoleum.
 which is the parlor, In half an hour
 luncheon will be served. In the meantime you pace up and down and
 wish you might discover mirror or a washstand or a place to powder your nose.
 Is anything lacking to your honor able comfort and pleasure? An, 1t shall be at once attended toi Suiting
 the action to the word, the proprietor
 tremendously bows himself out. Soon
 a damsel in kimono and wooden san
 daIs shud1les into the room, knocks
 her forehead three times on the floor,
 draws in her breath and triumphantly
 places a sprig of cherry blossoms in
 yellow vase!
 The chief difference between home | nI 41 ho ;e
 our old crabapple trees and Thomp-
 sons two cherry trees bloom we re-
 mark: tHow nice!" and go out and
 sniff at them enjoyably on Sunday
 afternoon and bring in a spray for the
 table. When two cherry trees bloom
 In Japan the mikado declares na-
 tional holiday, the whole nation goes
 en fete; the schools are dismissed,
 processions are held day and night;
 Japanese poets with f1llets in their
 hair charge up and down the land,
 chanting their verses. and 600 Amer
 lcan tourists photograph the phe- | nomenon.
 We landed in Tokyo in the midst of
 one of these festivals on typically
 bleak, raw day while gusts of chill
 rain and wind swept the streets. A
 concourse of mad poets, school chil-
 dren, runners, wrestlers and other su-
 pernumeraries were lugging Shinto
 temple through the streets, dancing and chanting around it and inditing
 peans of praise. They all looked blue
 and half frozen. And they all coughed
 pr snifhed.
 In the evening we saw A geisha
 dance. I am glad to have seen it. I
 am sure the first thing every woman I know who has been to Japan will
 say when she sees me is: "Oh, my
 dear, and did you see the geisha? 2?
 Wasn't the dancing perfectly fascinat- Ing? The most charming thing, be- lieve, in Japan! But then, of course, all of Japan is charming, isn't it?"
 can reply, yes; I saw the geisha. Aside from that satisfaction I don't