New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1913-08-13
AS | WAS SAYING

Puzzle: Find n name for the peerless new gas.
whose lghness to that OF hydrogen as sixteen to
one.
Great discovery. this! Though the stun exists at
present only in the sun. the democracy Of science
hopes to equaze matters by manufacturing 1t here
earth a distinguished chemist-the same who
first smelled the gas-fosters this ubilant expecta-
ton. which prompt TO espouse.
Life will be lovely then Persons dissatisfied with
our planet can pick out another trot TO the State
Department. get their toy balloons inflated and en-
10y the new freedom
A little music professor To embesh the occa-
sion. few glad strains from I'VE Don't Care II
You Never Come Back"
But just when the gas is delighting the bal
loonsts there come walls from the aviators. The
poor fellows report showers Of meteors-as II q
shower could scare any experienced airman! Isn't
he accustomed TO nying between drops?
Stated with the somnoent night life Of Berlin Mr.
George AIDE has returned TO Paris. But he does not
truly love Paris. either. For Paris has changed.
We appreciate his disgust. once have done II
city (and vice versa feel that Il is the duty OF
that city to stand pat and no one can deny that a
sad. sad change has befallen Paris The Paris
gamln is more. Urchins there are. yet in vain
do you tickle their ribs and pinch their ears and
WiBBe your nose at them, whereas anclently they
took the intiative-generaly with tributes to your
beauty.
But fate is kind and has already raised up
cessor to the gamins. Mr.. AIDE should try England
II he has luck, and passes factory at noon
time. twenty Joyous lasses will surround him. cry
ing: Penny for the at"
The mistakes OF our life have been many. And,
darn 1t! we finding them out. For instance our
folly in knocking off dancing We resigned for the
good OF the service" and now, after all these years
we begin TO perceive how swanlike really were.
CHANGING at last weeks catalogue OF new dances, we
find the Mantelpiece Bump, the Newelpost Slam, the
Billy Goat Butt. and that earliest of our creations
the White Satin Rip
Spooky Sir oliver Lodge is still tunnelng his way
toward the abode Of the spirits. and says they are
doing as much for him. Soon the tunnels will meet
Important developments awaited with more tina
breathless interest.
Personally, however. decline to idget. No
doubt there are many funny noises in Sir divers
head but why attribute them to spirits?
Meantime runs the account Of the Res
taurant Mems Associations last conclave the gen
eral sentiment that. Sunday morning at
least IT would not be wise to invite raids by keeping
open beyond the hour specified by the Mayor"
Well, well! This explains that singular phrase
the majesty OF the law"-to which our compliments
and the top Of the morning!
onlookers at the great congress of doctors have
made the same comment always: Such lovely
ducks! And to think that they were medical
students"
Rather rough on medical students, though per-
haps they deserve 1t. But medical students be-
tray the intelligence which, TO a discerning eye is
the cornerstone Of an endearing personality. They
have brains. Often we have medical student
with his pockets quite filled with them