davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
stamina the Wind.

In the village church during the
morning service the organist was an
n0yed because the organ-blower kept
working the lever noisily after he had
finished playing. A famous preacher
had come down from London to-
preach The organist scrubbed
note to the blower, and sent 1t round
by choir boy, who, misunderstand-
ing his instructions. put 1t into the
hands of the preacher. The note was
as follows: Perhaps you vii! kindly
stop when I tell you to. The people
have come here to hear my music, not
your noise"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

but my position has been somewhat
delicate. l could not very we'll be the
one to propose It,"
"Oh," she angrily exclaimed, then
you have been anxious to have it all
ended?"
why do you say that, dear?
haven't limited that I wished to have 1t
all ended"
"If you didn't you wouldn't have
thought of wanting an understanding
now. You would have been glad to
get me and find out about my short
comings afterward."
Am / to assume, then, that you
have been anxious to break our en-
gagement-seeing that you have asked
me to tell you about my faults at this
timer"
"Of course not. Why should you as
sumo such thing?"
For the same reason that you as.
sumed it,"
That's just like man, I've never
seen one yet who could be reason
able"
Every well, little girl. Let's change
the subject"
"But / don't want to change the
subject. I want you to know all that
is worst about me, so that IL you don't
want me you needn't take me-"
"All right. Tell me what is worst
about you
I'll don't think there is anything
worst about me. Now tell me what
your faults are"
"Well, / think /, too, am perfect"
Harold! Do you really mean that?"
Certainly"
I'm so glad we have had this I'M
derstanding and that now there Is no
danger of our making any mistake"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
The Basement
Philosopher
(cagrish. 1913. By w. C. chssm.a)
by KENNETH HARRIS

''Nels, my friend" said the janitor
TO his Scandinavian assistant, II take
notice that you're a-getting gay these
lays. That there cap OF yours 10 got
too small for your head and / don't
believe the caps shrunk any at that
What was you abusing that gentleman
for just row?-What gentleman? The
gentleman with the laundry, the yel-
low Completed gentleman with the
slant eyes and the baggy pants that
you was a-speaking to 30 unkindly.
"Chinyman, was he!" said the jani-
tor, with broad smile Of perfect COM
prehension. Well, of course that's
different. II he was Chink, / don't
know az / can blame you. It's per
fectly natural that you'd want to kick
him OF the premises and make mo-
tons to that effect. s'pose he give
you the excuse that he had business
here-what? Thirty-eight and twenty
seven gives him their shirts an nat
pieces. don't they! / thought they
did. Anyway you done we'll to let him
know that he was the scum of the
earth and the offscourings OF human
ity. He mightn't realize it II he was
treated civil and decent
When you come to think of 1t, it's
blessing that there 10 scum and Off
scourings for us to look down on and
kick around and bawl out once in
WHILE" unused the janitor. Wed GER
tainly be in bad way IL there wasn't.
I guess we'd lose all our self respect.
I know you've done me heaps OF good
that way, Nels, my friend. It's been
. great comfort to me after the agent
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
Made the psrson Happy.

1t was DR.. Cosmo Gordon Lang,
archbishop of York, who, when he
was bishop of Stephney, remarked,
apropos of the children of the East
end: "They are doing a great deal to
rebuke the tendency of the clergy to
become middle-aged in spirit-dull,
morose and superior" And he told
one of his favorite stories of an
East end cleric who was feeling life
less and disconsolate on setting out on
his daily round of visits, when little
street urchin looked up at him with a
cheerful eye and knowing smile, and
said: 'Ullo, young man! That greet
ing quite treasured the parson for the
rest of the day." Dr. Lang declares.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

| was q showerbath, a pair of scales,
and a bulletin board. He said you'd
cure need bath after workin' that
chest-developer. We amt got no
scales, nor no board, but we'll toggle
up some sort OF a bath for you. The
blacksmith's maxim a sQuirter to go
on the bar9''
Very well, put it wherever you
wish l sha'n's use it."
II wouldn't overlook nothih', if !
was you," said Willie, in even rnslder
tones that Slower had used
"You overwhelm me with these lit.
tie attentions" retorted Mr.. Speed.
Where you goin' to run today?" in
CURED the first speaker.
81 don't know. Why?"
1--WE thought you might Go hun
dred yards agin time"
"Nix!" interpcsed Glass, hurriedly.
Il can't let him overdo at the start
Besides, we amt got no stopwatch."
Il got regular watch" said Willie.
"and / can catch you pretty close.
We'd admire to see you travet some,
Mr.. Speed
But Glass vowed that he was in
charge of his protege's health, and
would not permit it. Once outside,
however, he exclaimed: That's more
of Fresno's work, Wally! / tell you,
he's Jerry. He'll rib them pirates to
clock you, and if they do-well, you'd
better keep runnin', that's ALL"
You can do me a favor" said
Speed. Buy that watch
There's other watches on the farm"
''Buy them all, and bring me the
bill"
Before setting out on his daily
grind, Speed announced to his train
ar that he had decided to take him
along for company, and when that
corpulent gentleman rebeiled on the
ground that the day was too sultry,
his employer would have none of it,
so together they trotted away later in
the morning, Speed in his silken suit,
Glass running fiat-footed and with
great effort But once safely hidden
from view, they dropped into walk.
and selecting favorable resting place,
paused. Speed lighted cigarette,
Glass produced deck Of cards from
his pocket, and they played seven-up-
Having covered five miles In this ex-
hausting fashion, they returned to the
ranch in time for luncheon. Both ate
heartily. for the exercise had agreed
with them.
RIO RE cONTINUEDl
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

ond, q mandolin has proved to be
many q young mans ruin.
Glass examined the bow of ribbon
upon the lonesome piece of exercising
apparatus.
"It looks like the trainin'-stable for
the Colonial DANES. What yelp iris
place would De to Covington or any
other athlete"
ut Is not an athletic gymnasium"
Speed smiled as he lighted cigarette.
ut is romantic gymnasium. Az
Socrates once Observed"
Socrates! I'm hep to him." Glass
interrupted, quickly. 81 trained a
Greek professor once and got wised
up on all that stuff Socrates was the
the Hennlock Kid
Exactly! AS Socrates. the Hem
lock Kid, deftly put 1t, in hoe sigma
ture vintage"
II don't get YOU"
THAT is archaic Scandinavian, and
| translated, means, Love cannot thrive
| without her bower"
"No answer to that telegram yet,
eh?"
| Hardly time"
Better wire Covington again, hadn't
you? Mebbe he didn't get it?"
II promised Mrs. Keap that would.
but" Speed lost himself abruptly
in speculation, for he did not know ex-
actly how to manage this unexpected
complication. OF one thing only was
he certain; 1t would require some
thought.
Say, wally. suppose Covington
don't conner"
Then / shall sprain my ankle
said the other. Hello! What In the
| world"
Still Bill Slower and Willie came into
| the room carrying an armful Of lum-
Der. Behind them followed Carara
with huge wooden tub, and Cloudy
rolling a kerosene barrel"
Where do you want 1t, gents?
| inquired the foreman.
| Where do we want what?"
| 1.-THE shower-bath."
| Shower l didn't order a shower.
BATH"
mo; but we aim to make it as pleas
ant for you as we can"
eff there is anything l abhor, it's a
shower-bath!" exclaimed the athlete.
| you just got to have one. Mr..
Fresno said all this gymnasium lacked
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
What Doctor Can Beat ThIsa

In less than three months ply
stefan of Portland, Me-, has treated
professionally five patients represent
ing five successive generations OF the
same family, beginning with cente-
marian and following in the direct line
of descent down to her great-great-
grandson. He first attended the old
lady, who was ninety-nine years old.
for senile gangrene resulting in her
death. During her illness he was
called on to prescribe for her daugh-
ter, aged seventy-five. Next this
daughters son, florist, aged fifty.
fell i'll and required attention. Fol-
lowing him, son, clerk of twenty
seven, found himself in need of medi-
cal aid. And lastly to the clerks wife
was born male child, whom the doc
tor. was called upon to assist into
the world, as he had been summoned
to ease the Observation-Disclosures
exit from 1t barely three months be-
fore
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
ProdIaal Parent.

Col. Roosevelt, one evening ~ Mar
quette, told group Of newspaper cor
respondents a number of stories.
IF more Of us were materially, but
not mentally, like the Arkansas back
woodsmen, 1t would be well for the
nation" said the colonel
Once, while traversing Arkansas, |
dismounted at log cabin and asked
IL / could haze dinner. Yes, they
said. could, and while waited on
the bench before the door ] noticed a
baby playing with loaded revolver.
Goodness mel / said, you
shouldn't let that young infant Ilay
with a loaded revolver. What a tyr
rible risk
Risk said the backwoodsn1an.
'Aw, / dunno. / got bout fo'teen mo
chillun round the place somewhere. "
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
SYNOPSIS.

Cowboys OF the Flying Heart ranch are
heartbroken over the loss of their much
priced photograph by the defeat Of their
champion in foot-race with the cook OF
the Centipede ranch. A house party Is
on at the Flying Heart. ]. Wallingford
Speed, cheer leader at Yale, and Culver
Covington, intercollegiate champion ran
ner. are expected. Helen Blake, Speed
sweetheart becomes interested in the luss
OF the photograph. She suggests to Jean
Chaplin. sister of the owner of the ranch.
that she induce Covington, her lover. to
win back the monograph. Helen declai co
that II Covington won't run. Speed VIII.
The cowboys are hilarious over the pros
pect. Speed and his valet. Larry Glass,
trainer at Yale arrive. Helen Blake asks
Speed, who hes posed to her as an ath-
sete, to race against the Centipede man.
The cowboys join in the appeal to Waliy,
end fearing that Helen will find him out,
he consents. He insists, however, that he
shall be entered as an unknown. figuring
that Covington will arrive in time to take
: his place. Speed begins training under
GLASS; direction. The ladies Ak up train
ing quarters for Speed.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

aas been raising Ned around here for
10 jack you up and tell you what
thought Of race OF people that put
Gshballs in their soup. / don't know
but what I'm going a little too far in
calling you q race. You're more like
. funeral procession, Judging by the
most of you that's worked for me.
But that's neither here nor there. We
can't all be Irish, nor yet American,
and it's a good thing as I'm a telling
you. Somebody's got to be the goat.
What makes me sore, and what
makes any right-thinking man sore, .
the janitor went on, SIS to see some
guy doing something that don't never
do nor never thought Of doing, and
couldn't do If l wanted to do it. You
understand that don't apply to base
ball or variety show stunts, but then's
about the only exceptions | can think
Of Just now. You take this here golf.
get the willies now every time I
take the old woman to the park. Hon
est, 1t takes away my appetite for the
lunch to see them lunatics. Seems to
me q grown person might find some
thing better to do than to put in time
swatting dinky little ball around
twenty-acre lot. l feel like sI1earing
their fingers with molasses and giving
them a couple of feathers to play with.
That would be a sensible form OF
amusement alongside Of golf, 1t looks
like to me. Some of 'em wear knee
panties, too. Gee! What they ought 10
wear is Russian blouse suits with
sailor collars and pretty little socks
on their pretty little legs. Fierce.
amt It?
Another thing that gives me pain
is to see a guy a-smoking a cigarette.
That's something there amt no ex-
cuse for that can see. Anybody can
get clay pipe. and couple OF
months steady smoking IL make 1t as
sweet and juicy as need be. A pipe is
man's smoke. though l amt got no OBJ
lection to a-cigar once in while
about election time. Same way III
take a tub Of suds when I'm dry and
I've got the price, but IL you're bound
it's your treat and ! happen 10 1eei
like 1t you can give me little rye. But
mines beer as a general thing. Thats
one thing I'll give the Dutch credit
for: they may have poor language
and disgusting ideas on the subject
of cooking, but they're all right when
1t comes to a steady and sensible
drink. Most drink is good in modera-
ton, though, as long as it's not mixed
The only thing / drag the line at Is
Scotch. What / say is. patronize home
industries. I've no use for Scotch or
man who will drink it.
YES, sir" said the janitor. empnat-
Ically. I'm against gol' and bridge
whist and cigarettes and Scotch. Like
wise I'm opposed to spaghetti and CAD
hage soup and Bismarck herring and
enop suey and four o'clock tea. I'm an
American citizen. At the same time l
don't claim that Dagos and Hikes and
Chinks and Hunkies and Scandehoov-
Eans amt got no right to live. and
don't feel called on TO kick EN- around
vhen get one % EN- on by himself,
/ ny more than I'd feel called on 10
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
LEAVING THE COURSE CLEAR
Little Story That Proves the Value Of
Thorough Understanding Be-
tween Lovers.

II think" she said, I'VE ought, be-
fore it is forever too late, to try to
thoroughly understand each other. We
ought to confess any shortcomings we
have, so that II either of us dnds that
marriage might be irksome or unsat-
isfactory we may end our engagement
and escape what might otherwise be
lifelong misery"
I'm glad you suggested that" he
answered. 81 have often thought OF 1t,
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
CHAPTER ViI.-ontlnued.


mo, indeed" Jean corrected, chs
will merely use this room to train in.
"How do you train In room?'
xtover asked her.
why, you-just train, l suppose.
Miss Chaplin turned to Glass. How
does a person train in a room?"
why, he-just trains, that's all. A
guy can't train Without trainin' quar-
ters. can he?"
I'VE thought 1t would make a nice
gymnasium" offered .IIss Blake.
Looks like business" Stover's adj
miration was keen. Il rode over to
Gallagher's place last night and laid
our bets"
How much have you wagered?'
asked Fresno.
"More'n we can afford to lose"
''But you aren't going to lose" Miss
Blake said, enthusiastically.
''I got Gallagher to play some rec
ords for me-
"'Silas on Fifth Avenue'?"
Sure! And The Holy City, too!
Willie stayed out by the barb-wire
fence; he didn't dast to go in, When |
come out / found him ready to cry.
That desperate has sure got the heart
Of q woman. reckon he'd commit
murder for that, phonograph-he's so
full of sentiment"
Fresno spoke sympathetically.
Its a fortunate thing for you fell
lows that Speed came when he did.
I'm anxious for him to beat this cook,
and hate to see him SO careless with
his training"
'Careless!" cried Helen.
What's he done?" inquired Slower.
Nothing, so far. That's the trouble
FTe's sure he can win, but"-Fresno
shook his head. doubtfully-'t there's
such a thing as overconfidence. No
Snatter how good man may be, he
ghould take care of himself"
whats wrong with his trainin'?"
demanded Glass.
81 think he ought to have more rest
It's too noisy around the house; he
can't get enough sleep"
'Nor anybody else" agreed Glass,
meanfngly; there's too much singin'.''
That's funny" said Slower. Music
socthes me, no matter how bad it is
last night when we come back from
the Centipede Mr.. Fresno was singin'
Dearie.' brit | dozed right off in the
snniddle Of it. An it's the same way
with cattle. They like 1t. It's part
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

OF a mans duty when he's night-ridin'
herd to pizen the atmosphere with
meiody."
I'VE can't afford 20 spoil Speed 8
chances" argued the young man
There is too much at stake. Am |
right. Mr.. Glass?"
Now, like most fat men, Lawrence
Glass was fed of his rest, and since
his arrival at the Flying Heart his
sleeping-hours had been shortened con-
siderably. 80 for once he agreed with
che Californian.
mo question about It." said he.
And III sleep here with him IL youth
put couple of cots in the place"
"But suppose Mr.. Speed won't do
~" questioned Miss Blake.
you ask him. and he won't refuse"
said Jean.
1--WE don't want TO see him defeat
ed urged Helep's other sutton; at
shlcs the girl -ose. saying doubtfully;
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31

"He has written new play"
Originate"
Eyes. The heroine 10 married
woman"
"Oh, know. And falls in lore with
another man"
NO. There's the original part OF
it. The play shows marriage to be
a sacred relation that some people
take seriously and get a good deal e.
happiness out Of"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
Answered.

ne CRYING to strike up an. acquaint-
ance)-What! Only you here? Where
has al: the other nice girls gone?
She (bitingly)-Theyve gone off
somewhere with all the nice boys
London Opinion.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
CTO BE CONTTNUED)
Extraxaaa Wasted.

What's doing?" asked the tall
plumber. You're all dolled up" Had
a. date with my best girl" explained
the short bricklaye-. But aren't you
going to keep it?" Il showed up ali
right, hat she wasn't there That
was pretty tough" Il wouldn't care.
said the short brick,ayer, only
vent and had my shoes shined all 70
,scthinG. "--Youngstown Telegram
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1913-10-31
In1nortant to Mothers
Test of Temper.

Cows are placid animals"
Indeed they are! Observe what pa
tience and forbearance they show
when thumped in the ribs by flying
golf balls"
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1913-03-03
The difference In Men.

One man will settle down into the
routine OF his calling, digging the
ruts deeper each day, until he loses
power to e out from them. Anoth-
er, In the same vocation, shows an
ability to make each days work q
source Of new growth in power and
In appreciation. So, one person will
rest passively on the fact Of some
well.established love or friendship,
n thus lose, after a time, the beau.
ty Of the relationship and the mean
ing 1t once possessed for his life;
while another actively woos the love
of his friend every day, and 80 finds
a deep, ever opening below deep in
the relationship, with an ever fresh
realization Of the truth and wonder
OF life.-Edward Howard Griggs.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1913-03-03
MADE HIM STOP AND THINK
Leading Citizen Wanted to Be Remem-
bered az Something More Than
an "OId Crouch"

II had a little lesson several weeks
ago." remarked the man with the gray
mustache, land 1t called me in good
shape"
100 ahead" said the stout man.
81 was in the garage where 1 keep
my car and happened to overheaf q
conversation among the boys. A Ger
tain man had been injured while trav-
cling abroad-very badly injured, 1t
was reported-and one Of the boys
was telling the others about 1t. The
story in the paper says he can't get
WELL the youngster went on. Did
you know him, Peter And the boy ad-
dressed promptly replied, Sure, I
know tn old Crouch Say, that hit
me pretty hard. Here was a leading
citizen dying and all the boy could re-
member about him was that he was q
crouch. Yes, sir, it made me sit up
and think hard. And 1 got in my mind
that when I passed out I'd like to be
remembered for something different"
He paused.
That's worth considering" said the
other man.
Good text" said the first man.
Good sermon" said the other.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1913-03-03
Muscles and Brain.

Experiments conducted by Mosso OF
Turin indicate that physical educs
ton and gymnastics serve not only
for the development Of the muscles,
but for that Of the brain a we'll. II
Is becoming evident, in the opinion OF
this authority, that as much time
should BIO devoted to muscular exer-
else az 10 intellectual exercise. and
that children should begin reading
and writing. only after they are nine
years old,
Muscular fatigue exhibits pheno.
mepa idantieai with Intellectual ia
tigue. Nerve cells show q tendency to
rest every ten, seconds. jItlis probable
that only part OF the brain IL active
at q time; the various parts relieve
n another. The more mobile n
animals ~extremitles ire, the more In
teiligent, other thingn being equal. IL
is.-Harper's Weekly.
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1913-03-03

Notice is hereby given that seal
ed proposals will be received at the
office of the county clerk of Elko
County, State of Nevada up to 10
O'Clock a. m. the 4th day of March
1913 for doing the county printing
for Elko County. from March 1,
1918. to and including the 31st day
of December, 1914. Said printing
to include all the notices. allow
ances. delinquent tax list, delin-
quent tax sales. election notices, !list
of registered voters all primary cleo
tion advertising and primary cleo
ton notices including all sam
pile ballots used for advertising
purposes in said primary election,
and to do any and all their print
ing required by the said Elko
County and all printing and blanks
required and used by the respective
County officers of said Elko County
and do any and all printing and pub
fishing for which any funds in the
Treasury of said Elko County is or
shall become liable during the term
or life of this contract. except how.
ever. all bound blank and record
books, all Australian ballots, both
for the primary and general cleo.
tions and all blanks used BY the
assessor of said county in making
the regular assessment.
Bids to be opened and read
publicly at the time stated above,
Bids to state monthly compensation
asked for services.
The board hereby eserves the
right to reject any and all bids.
Seal By order of the Board o.
County Commissioners Of Elkt
County, State of Nevada.
Attest: Fred C. Voight
Seal Clerk of said BoarC
Dated Feb. z, 1918
Daily independent. [volume] (Elko, Nev.) 188?-1915, 1913-03-03
Tea Was Not Popular n 1zsa.

A description Of a model country
rector's household in an issue of the
London World for 1853 shows that
tea.drinking was then far from gen.
eral: His only article Of luxury is
tea, but the doctor say he would
forbid that, II his wife could forget
her London education. However. they
seldom offer 1t but to the best COM
pany, and less than a pound will last
them a twelvemonth."
A few years prior to this the Fe-
male Spectator declared that the tea
table costs more to support than
would maintain two children at
nurse; 1t is the utter destruction of
all economy, the bane OF good house.
wifery, and the source OF idleness."