The Topeka state journal., 1913-08-02

send a boy up in about half an hour
he can take the outfit home"
IF y plough all this yard in hait
an hour you'll beat the hull caboodie of
u.s. said the farmer as he looked the
ground over. wall. I'll send boy af-
ter the critters about sundown. OF
course, yo know all about 'haw' AMI
'gee?'"
My dear man. smiled Mr.. Bowser.
L used the words before l had cut
six teeth, and you needn't worry in the
slightest. Drop over this evening and
see if you can find any fault with Tay
work.
When the neighbor had gone Mrs.
Bowser came out and said:
If you'll wait until hunt up an
old dress I'll drive the oxen for YOU
! Never you mind about driving any
oxen for me- he replied, as he re-
moved his coat and vest. IF 1 had
as many dollars as acres of ground
I've ploughed with oxen we'd go to
Europe this fall Who'd thought two
months ago that we'd be out here in
the country today turAing up the gold
en- soil and bathing in the glorious
sunshine! Say, what a painting that
landscape would make-down there
across the meadow"
Yes replied Mrs. Bowser, as
her eyes took in old straw stack,
two rail fences and a corn field gone
to weeds.
Anu lIe Hefry-nearted plough
man Is now ready to plough. If YOU
don't want to be buried under the
mellow soil you'd better stand back.
These oxen look to me to be a little
frisky, and when we start we may 20
Is times around the yard without
stopping. All ready now-haw over
gee up"
Mr.. Bowser flourished the CAD
about his head and brought it down
on the backs of the waiting oxen to
start off with enthusiasm. They start
ed. No fault could be found with
their enthusiasm. He dropped the
CAD" and seized the plough handles,
ana the next minutes the oxen were
on the run for the opposite fence and
Mr.. Bowser was playing circus behind
them. Sometimes he was on one foot
sometimes on two. Sometimes he
bounded into the air like Il high
jumper-sometimes he seemed to be
sailing after the plough, which ripped
through the grass and did not enter
the soil at all. When the oxen brought
up against the fence with a crash Mr.
Bowser was flung to the left into a
patch of pigweeds, and he lay there
blinking at the sun when Mrs. Bow
ser came up and said:
Il thought you knew all about
ploughing and driving oxen"
And why don't I?'. he shouted. as
he got up with the few hairs on
his head standing on end. you've
can plough, haven't you? 1 was sim
ply getting start L told you these
oxen looked frisky but Ill tame 'em
down after q Bit
Hadn't you better let the man do
sods ?''
the ploughing and you can follow
on behind and pick up the stones and
Never! What am 1 out here on q
farm for? What did get this plough
for? You just keep away and I'll he
rha III.
afraid of you, and that's the reason
they started off as they did,
But you might have been killed.
she persisted, as she started for the
house.
"Yes, and I might have spread my
wings and sailed away to heaven!''
he retorted. And then to the oxen:
You go on, Now. then, haw
around here and gee up. That's the
way. Tell me the merry, merry
ploughman can't plough, will you?'
The oxen started off at "A gentle pace
this time, but going where they
pleased, and Mr.. Bowser followed af-
ter. Sometimes he dug the point of
times the handles were down in the
grass and the point in the air He
was ripping things" however, and
was Wen pleased for about two min
utes. Then he made a sudden lunge
on the handles. the plow struck a
rock. and as he went into the air the
oxen whirled about and ran over ev-
erything behind and brought up in a
fence corner. Mrs. Bowser, who was
looking on from the back steps. had
just reached the scene and was hunt
ing in the grass for Mr.. Bowser's body
when the farmer who owned the out
fit came up and said:
Il kinder guessed he didn't know
anythin' about plowlng, and so
was hidin' down thar behind the fence
to be at hand. He's had the wind
knocked out o him, but | guess he's
all right. Let's drag him up by the
back door"
1t was half an hour before Mr.. Bow
ser sat up on the grass and looked
about him. The man was plowing the
yard, and Mrs. Bowser had the cam
phor bottle at his nose.
We'll" said she, 1.-The merry, mer-
ry plowman has held the warbling pIow"
II understand" he replied as he
transfixed her with his glare. Just
as L got started you threw a rail at the
oxen and hoped and expected I'd be-
come a mangled corpse! I'1I-I'H see
you later.''
You needn't feel bad about it, nay
bur-" said the farmer in a consoIing
voice as he came and bent over the
warbling pIowman These ere oxen
have killed three different hired men
for me, and if you'd been flung about
a foot further you'd have struck a
stun and ben mashed mashed UP like
a pumpkin. You'd better stick to
bluffin and let plowin' alonei"-(Copy-
right, 1913. by the Mcclure Newspa-
per Syndicate.)