Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1913-12-20
PECULIAR CLIENTS
Cranks With Whom Lawyers
Sometimes Have TO Deal.
QUEER CASES OUT or COURT.
sAneester" Clients Are Quite Common,
and Their Claims Are Just Abou, as
Visionary as Those Of Numerous
Patent Seekers Are Freakish.

w utt u lHt ht'et iifihiNAt AAnf ttAA
has ever been brought 10 you by
prospective client" was the question
put not long ago by the writer 70 one
OF che ablcst lawyers iu New York
The lawyer said that probably the
oldest client who bad ever visited him
was woman about forty years old.
who wanted 20 bring suit against one
OF the sunday newspapers for not hav-
ing printed an account al her latest
social function Oh is society page.
as she had particularly requested over
the telephone.
As the second oldest client. he cited
the case OF another woman who had
come to him In tears and sought to en-
list his legal aid IN making her hus.
band stop tllrting. The woman as
sured me that she loved her husband
and that she knew her husband loved
her. but that he had a habit OF wink
ing at every good looking woman he
saw" said the lawyer When told
her there was no Legal redress for her
inasmuch as she said ! was a fool II
even thought she or her husband want
ed a divorce. she exclaimed that ! was
the poorest lawyer she had ever beard
OF and left my office In q rage
The same question was put 10 sever
al other lawyers and an unbcleyably
peculiar assortment OF would be clients
was revealed through their answers
One patent lawyer cited the case Of
a man who asked him 20 represent him
for two months ut the patent Office In
Washington Il want you to 80 there,
stay there and represent me he said.
But interposed the attorney. what
in the world do you want me to do
while am there"
The man drew his chair close TO the
lawyers and in low tones told the at
torney that he had invented an aero
plane clock" as he called H. and that
he wanted him TO 90 TO the patent Of
fee and prevent any other inventor
from sneaking in similar invention
while the authorities are In careless
mood"
The man seemed to be In his normal
senses despite the fact that his highly
priced invention was absolutely moth
ing more than small watch fastened
in leather case. the sort that may be
seen IN stores anywhere. When he
had impaired this information the law
yer pointed out that there was moth.
Ing patentablc about his Invention
There isn't eh?" shouted the man.
Indeed there is Who has ever
thought before this Of putting clock
in an alrShipT
The attorney sought TO humor him
and said Wouldn't watch in the
aylator'S pocket do as well:'
The man jumped up. That's jus,
the point he cried. 1T would not DO
as well. because 1t might fall out
Against such logic the attorney said
he found himself helpless. and he told
the man he feared the case was too
difficult for him to handle
Another strange client who visited a
patent lawyer wanted to secure q pat
ent on flower clothespin." The lat.
ter was an ordinary wooden clothesrin
with little wire point on top. On the
latter fresh flowers might be stuck.
thereby. according 10 the inventor.
''giving the clotheslincs the appearance
OF flower gardens" He saw a fortune
from the sale OF his pins In cities.
when the lawyer assured him that.
besides the fact that there was more
sentimentaliiy than practicability to
his invention a pin stuck In the end
OF the wood would serve just as eifec
lively rs the invented" piece OF wire
the client threatened TO bring suit
against him for violation OF conf
dence."
Another patent lawyer said that thu
oldest client who had ever come "a
him was a young woman who wanted
his help in getting patent. literally
on an idea"
what IS your idea?" asked the law
yer curiously.
The young woman refused 10 tel
him. saying that she hesitated to al
vulge the nature OF her idea until Il
had been secured by patent. 81 wont
trust anybody with II. not even You.
she told the lawyer.
Like the famous Anneke Jams heirs
there are numerous strange cases Of
so called ancestor clients" 10 be haf
from the lawyers
One Of the oldest OF these Is cite,
by a New York lawyer Of wide prac
tice. mot long ago" he says. "ther,
came 20 my office woman who insist
ed that she owned the lower part o
the Hudson river. having inherited (
from Henry Hudson. her ancestor. n
right ~ discovery
III this seems an exaggerated cas-
! shall cite n second one that Is strau
ger still Last winter man. who sal,
he had been recommended to me by
spirit az seance he had attende,
several nights previous. wanted me Z
prove his title 20 the land upon whicl
the subtreasnry building stands II
told me that IL had been given TO nj
ancestor Of his by George washlngto
out of gratitude for the formers loai