The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-11-27
From conversation" by Mary

From conversation, by Mary Greer
Conklin.
~ BOD talk is not to be had for the
" asking. Humors must first be
~ accorded in a kind OF overture for
prologue; hour, company and circum-
stances be suited; and then at a fit juno
tion, the subject, the quarry Of two heat
ed minds, springs up like deer out of
the wood. Stevenson knew well as Alice
in Wonderland that something has to
open the conversation. You can't even
drink a bottle of wine without opening
it," argued Alice; and every dinner guest,
during the quarter of an hour before din
ner has felt the sententiousness of her
remark. Someone, in writing about this
critical period, so conversatonally diff
ficult, has contended that no person in
his senses would think of wasting good
talk In the drawing room before dinner,
but Professor Mehaffey thinks otherwise.
'1n the very forefront there stares us
in the face that awkward period which
even the gentle Meander notes as the
worst possible for conversation the short
time during which people are assembling,
ner. II the witty man were not usually
a selfish person, who will not exhibit his
talent without the reward of full and
leisurely appreciation, this Is the real mo-
ment to show his powers A brilliant
thing said at the very start which sets
people laughing, and makes them forget
that they are waiting may alter the
whole complexion of the party may make
the silent and distant people feel them
selves drawn into the sympathy of COM
mon merrment, and thaw the iciness
which so often feters Anglo-Saxon So
cety. But as this faculty is not given. to
many, so the average man may content
himself with having something ready to
tell, and this, If possible in answer to
the usual question, expressed or implied
Is there any news this afternoon? There
are few days that the daily paper
will not afford to the intelligent critic
something ridiculous in styde or matter
which has escaped the ordinary public;
some local event may suggest a topic
not worth more than a few moments of
attention, which will secure the interest
of minds vacant, and perhaps more hum
CRY to be fed than their bodies. Here
then, If anywhere in the whole range of
conversation, the man or woman who de-
sires to be agreeable may venture to
think beforehand and bring with them
something ready merely as the first kick
or starting point to make the evening
run smoothly" However this may be, it
is only with that communicative feel
i,,., af aatippr and drink
ing that takers warm up to discrimi-
mating discussion, and in the drawing
room just before dinner one can scarcely
expect the conversation to turn on any,
thing but trifles.
The question is often asked. What
should guests talk about at dinner?"
restrict my Interrogation to guests, be-
cause there Is distinction between the
directing of a dinner guests CONVERSE
tion and the guiding of the talk by host
or hostess into necessary or interesting
channels A guests first duty is to his
dinner companion, the person with whom,
according to the prearranged plan of the
hostess. he enters the dining room and
by whom he finds himself seated at table,
His next duty is to his hosts He has
also an abstract conversational duty to
his next nearest neighbor at table. 1t is
every guests duty, too, to keep his ears
open and be ready to join in general talk
should the host or hostess attempt to
conversation
The best answer to the question, "What
should guests at dinner talk about?" is
anything and everything provided the
talk Is tinctured with tact, discretion and
discrimination. While one talks to ones
dinner companion in a low voice. how
ever, it needs nice discrimination not to
seem to talk under ones breath, or to
say anything to a lefthand neighbor which
neighbor to hear
There is something more due a host
and hostess than mere greetings on en-
tering and leavetakings on departing. If
the dinner party is so large that all
guests cannot show them at the table the
attention due them, the delinquent ones
can at least seek an opportunity in the
drawing room, to pay their host and
hostess the proper courtesy. Hosts should
never be made to feel that it is to their
cook they owe their distinction, and to
their table alone that guests pay visits.
To say that the dominant note in table
talk should be light and humorous is go
ing too far, but conversation betwes
dinner companions should tend strongly o
the humorous, to the light, to the sniai
change of ideas. There should be ait
adroit intermixing of light and se,iel,s
talk.
, A narration or an anecdote shoud not