The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1913-10-01

1 ~ XSJ III ":H - VII IN
back yard like :, be: va.
"Now. this is wIni | can ~r..ra,+i.,'
exclaimed Mr.. BowSor as lie sat down
on the ground near tie tire li..i locked
around with Il smile. Mrs i,,wser
think Of the hot and crowded. Ly. til,
bricks and coh!,I".:";rs. the s.:Htriug.
OF the people VIII" - :ei away"
MIS-. BoWSer VII. -. and fOr an
hour MIR. BOwSer attended the fire, in
the most faithful lMlIliier. The man
had warranted soap in sixty minutes.
but at the end of that time the stuff in
the kettle was foaming away as at first.
Mrs. Bowser strolled around to have a
look and to say:
Il don't believe you will make soap
out of that stuff"
eowser's Brew Stays Soft.
"What you don't believe would fill
a big book" sulkily answered Mr.. Bow
ser. II think 1t needs salt"
"Who ever heard Of salt&n soft soap?'
II have, and I'm going to put some
in. We always use salt to solidify it."
Mr.. Bowser got a bowl Of salt and
threw it in, but the only effect was to
make more foam. He went back to the
house for more, but changed his mind
and brought out a box of ginger, a cup
Of white sugar and a package Of corn
starch and chucked them in one after
another.
THAT will be a curious brand of
soap" said Mrs. Bowser an she watch
ed the proceedings.
MI. Bowser turned on her and point
ed to the doorsteps. He had got his
mad up and was dangerous. She re-
tired, and he brought another pail of
water and increased the fire. He sud-
denly remembered reading that old
boots were good things in making soft
sQpp, and, having noticed a barrel of
them in the woodshed, he went after
and brought out three pairs and drop
ped them into the kettle. When the
contents had been boiling for an hour
Mrs. Bowser suggested that it was bed
time and that he had all the next day
to experiment in, but he drew himself
up stifly and replied:
IF it's bedtime, then 60 to bed. set
out to make soft soap. and I'll make it
II I have to stay awake two weeks"
When she had gone in he bethought
him that his mother used to use a sas-
safras stick in stirring the contents Of
the soap kettle. He didn't know sas-
safras from rosewood; but, taking an
other trip to the kitchen and pantry,
he carried out a bath brick, a box Of
stove polish, a loaf of bread and three
nutmegs, and these things went into
the kettle to keep the old boots CON-
pany.
No Soap In Sight.
Ten minutes later he added q dozen
potatoes, and a little later he chucked
In an old straw hat from the stock in
the woodshed. He was no nearer soar
than when the fire was first lighted,
and as he realized this he flung an
Did paint key in on top Of all and
muttered to himself:
by the beard of my father, but I'll
have soap or death! If she doesn't
come in fifteen minutes more''-
She didn't. The smell had got to be
like the odors of three glue factories
condensed and put up in original pack
ages, and Mr.. Bowser had worked
faithfully for three long hours in
smoke and heat. All Of a sudden he
in and kicked the kettle off the
fire and overturned it. and then, seiz-
ing an ak, he hammered away until
the vessel was In fragments. Ten
minutes later his coming to bed awak-
ened Mrs. Bowser, who sleepily que
ried:
well, how's your soapy"
mot a word, woman-not a word!'
hoarsely replied Mr.. Bowser.
"But what's the matter"
"Never you mind; l understand what
has happened, and tomorrow morning
we'll have q talk and settle matters.
Long ago l warned you that you were
driving me to the dead line. The line
has been reached at last, and it only
remains to arrange the parting-the
parting, Mrs. Bowser! Not a word,
not a lisp-no excuses! You were de-
termined that I shouldn't make soft
soap, and to battle me you willfully
and maliciously"-
But Mrs. Bowser was asleep and
smiling as she slumbered.