Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1913-03-10

worst and the best impulses in the
human soul struggle against each
other for possession.
The instability of this age makes
discipline difficult-the training of
the will, hard. Yet the life efficiency
If the child depends upon the devel-
opment of the will at this time. We
must be Just in our demands and
positive and firm in their execution.
The child must realize that governing
himself and his desires is a good,
bitter as it seems 10 him at the time.
There are few of US who do not re-
member some teacher our our child
hood whose firmness commanded our
respect and innate admiration and
love. There was substance in her
we felt worth while. Here again we
are on dangerous ground, for it is
easy to hector and to scold and issue
trivial commands and prohibitions
that are nagging and provoke the
child's secret and insolent contempt.
Public criticisms, over harsh ridi-
Guile, all wound the child deeply and
make scars that are never entirely
effaced. 1t is the egotistic time and
the child wavers between confidence
and belief in himself and adispairing
uncertainty and doubt in his powers.
To deride and belittle him is a cru
city that should be inhuman but too
often is not. Praise and encourage
ment should raise his self-esteem,
and courteous consideration of our
children as beings like ourselves will
meet with sure response.
l believe in impressing upon the
child at this time keen sense of his
family relationships, as a unit of the
family; that it has an allotted part
in the organization and has its re-
sponsibilities and duties-not duties
for us or to us as parents, but as a
member of the family, and that it is
to be loyal to it and to it's best tra-
ditions, and to take pride in advanc-
ing the family interest; that it's con-
duct reflects credit or discredit upon
the family, and IS an aid to this,
family custom and tradition, family
attitude and method of observing
events and dealing with the various
relations of life are a means.
Manners are a worry, often
needless worry, for the mental and
physical coordination at this period
are imperfect and often the actions
self-conscious and awkward; but if
the constant example we set them is
the expression of grace of spirit and
kindliness of soul, we need have no
fear of the outcome.
The adolescent is prone to special
weaknesses and moral perversions
resulting from the instability of the
emotions. and any stress upon them
may lead to undesirable and per-
verted results. The physical condi-
tions must be carefully guarded; too
much warmth, tight-fitting clothing,
tight corsets, rich foods, too soft
mattresses, indulgences, mental over
stimulation are to be guarded
against Sympathy and interest in
the home, exercise in the open air,
hnoIfhty daily Pof - \
mind, objective rather than subject
i've or personal interests, are the nat
ural means of combating such ten
dencies. Above all, there must be
confidence between the parents and
their children, and trust that per-
mits and receives friendly counsel
and advice.
In conclusion, let me quote from
Edwin Martins THE Luxury of Chill
dren":
Almost any kind of parent will
do at a pinch, except liar. II we
are exceptionally commendable per-
sons, as people go, so much the bet
ter for our children, for like not only
breeds like, but trains like, and good
father, good child is fairly reliable
rule, though good mother, good
child is somewhat surer one But
even if we are not notably exem-
plary, we may hope to get along as
parents, if only we are honest. We
may as we'll make up our minds in
the first place that in so far as we
are reproduced in our children, and
| in so far as we influence them, it is
what we really are that is repro
duced and that las influence, not
what we pretend to be. Like begets
like. Gentleness is not induced by
stormy exhortation, nor manners by
precept alone. Conduct in children
Is the resultant of various forces of
training, instinct and imitation, and
of the three the last'is not the least.
"But parents who entertain the
theory that it is their province al
ways to appear to their children the
embodiment of abstract right cut out
hard lines for themselves and enter
tain ambitions doubtful in yalue and