Deming graphic. (Deming, N.M.) 1903-1948, 1913-05-23
IN the DEAC0N'S PEW
nv ]. e. MACDONALD.


Of the Confederate army, arrived ON
tho scene and announced his inten.
ton OF starting q daily Journal every.
one was pleased But when the gen.
.sral visited Deacon Lamb. one Of
sanderson's most prominent citizens.
with a view to renting suitable
building In which to house the Sand
erson Daily Trumpet, the deacon de.
clined to lease without receiving q
quarters rent In advance.
"Sirrr.r!" Numbered the redoubt-
able Shorter. you insult me. Pay In
advance. indeed sir. never"
The deacon. one OF the mlldest-
hammered of men. felt embarrassed
and stammered out--for he had an
impeachment OF speech: "N-n-nno Of
tense, I ho.ho-hope. general"
But General Snorter's dignity was
sfrronted and the initial number Of
the Trumpet contained scorching
article devoted to the deacon. and
scarcely a day passed without the
good man being In some manner
yituperated In the columns Of Sand
erson's only paper. Now Deacon
Lamb, q leading member OF the
church, was much respected by his
fellow citizens none OF whom ap.
proved OF the Trumpet's attacks.
Yet nobody dared to demonstrate
with the editor. General Shorter was
known to be the only survivor OF four
brothers. who had all died with their
boots on" leaving bloody records be.
hind them and II report spoke truly
the controller OF the Trumpet's edi-
torial destlnies had slain several per
sonal friends during somewhat lin.
tied residence In Texas. Yet the
deacon preserved an unruiiied calm
under fire. Even when Elder Durham
fearful lest the truculent Shorter
might proceed from verbal to physical
violence, urged his brother church. 4
man to try to placate the exterior I
Of the Lone Star State the deacon
merely shook his head and STAN.
mered:
"Tt.the g.g.general Is q c-ch-ch.child
OF w.w.w.wrath, but d.d.d-do-don't !
consider him d-d.d.dad- dangerous
man"
Thus matters stood when Shorter.
In all editorial on a religious revival
being then conducted In the town by
d couple OF travelling eyangelists.
seized the opportunity to emit the
following yindictive blast:
We know OF no one In greater
need Of the sacred ministrations OF
these good men than that precious
old coundrel-Deacon Lamb Even
fortyrod whisky won't revive him.
He has tried that for the past thirty
years. II the liquor he has swallowed
during that period could be poured
into one vast tank It would form q
lake sufficiently large to drown the
entire congregation, the members of
which have for decade been delud-
cd cheated and gulled BY this toddy.
soaked and loathsome old hypocrite
At about eleven o'clock OF the day
on which this article appeared Dea-
con Lamb entered the editorial sane.
tum OF the Trumpet and approached
Saorter's desk The general looked
ny with a savage scowl.
We'll sirrrr" no growled fierce
~ what can do for your"
"N'n.nn.no not much. g.g-ggeneral.
! III merely wished"
Come. come. make II short, make
II short. cant sit here all day
listening to your Internal suffering.
Yes, g'gg-general. I'll m.m.m-make
IL ss ss's's'short AZ ppppossible."
Taking the morning issue Of the
Trumpet from his pocket he pointed
10 the obnoxious article and asked the
general II he wrote II.
OF course | wrote It. What OF It.
sir"
An instant later the deacon
sripped the general by the back OF
Ills neck and. producing stout raw.
hide whip. proceeded to lash the as.
'ohished warrior with tremendous |
'isor Shorter struggled and yelled
lor mercy ia vain. The deacon held
MN In grasp OF iron until he had
finished his exercise. Then he hurled
MS victim into q corner. remarking:
h'hhhave m.m-mmade II az
Ss's'short as p-pppossible. g.g-g-gen.
erai' bb'bbut when you are m.m-m.
mete at ll.lleisure I s-s-s.shsll be
ah'h'happy to renew ttt.this c-c-c-
conconverSation"
Inc news spread quickly through
eahderson and the deacon's friends
legged him not to venture upon the
street unarmed, as 1t was freely pre-
u'eted that the ferocious Shorter
would not rest until he had executed
uEe vengeance upon his castisator.
Sa' the deacon refused to cucumber
himself with weapon. He only
smiled mildly and said:
rtt'the g-g.g.gen.general is q
eeeeh'ch child OF w.w.w.wrwrwrath.
ueebut d-dd.don't c-c-c-concon.
s'uer him q dd.d.dangerous m.m.m.
man"
oh the following Sunday morning,
sreatiy to the surprise Of the citi.
Sens OF Sanderson. Deacon Lamb and