davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
humorous department.

Way Of virsinians.-Gen. John Nj.
Wilson, formerly superintendent at
West Point, and beloved equally by
soldier and civilian, while having a
warm spot in his heart for old Vir-
ginia. finds keen delight in twitting
her sons upon their crowning weak
ness, says the Washington Times.
Hating Senator Swanson the other
day, with merry twinkle in his mer-
ry eye, he spoke thus:
Senator, / dreamed last night that
/ had gone to heaven, and while st.
Peter, or maybe 1t was Gabriel, was
taking me around, showing me the
pearly battlements and the golden
streets of the new Jerusalem, / saw
several stout angels busily engaged In
lashing a new arrival to lamp post
This party made vigorous protest, bit
ing, kicking and scratching in man
ner that seemed totally foreign to the
sublime peace of the heavenly city.
"'Who is that gentleman and why
is he acting so unruly?' asked my
guide.
"'Oh, that's a fellow who came UP
from Richmond last night respond
ed Gabriel, with a glance Of irritation
at the newcomer. He's kicking be-
cause they won't let him go back to
Virginia
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
KILLED BULL WITH HIS HANDS
Big Irishman Gave Mexicans Chance
To Sec How Americans "Would Do IT,"

Big Irishman Gave Mexieans Chance
To See How Americans "Would Do IT,"
In the "nineties" everybody on the
Mexican Central knew Mike Moran. He
was gigantic young ish-American,
standing about six foot three in his
stockings, and proportioned like a
hercules.
He had worked his way up from
coal-passer to fireman, from fireman to
freight engine driver, and from freight
to passenger. Promotion was rapid
twenty years ago on the Mexican Gen.
trail.
Mikes grand coup, that made his
name known from El Paso to Oaxaca,
was made when, as cub" engine
driver. he was in charge Of a gravel
train during the construction Of the
Sullivan road, now known as the Mex
lean National.
1t happened at Acambovo, which was
then the end Of the line. The town was
wide open," as they say, with gam
bling, drinking and bull fighting as the
standard amusements Of the rollicking
crowd of well-paid adventures who
were rapidly pushing the road to COM
pletion with the vim and energy that
characterize the American working
man wherever he may be found.
The usual Sunday afternoon bull
fight found Mike, or Don Miguel" as
the admiring poems Of his gravel train
called him, with a load of vino under
his belt, which he carried with ease
and dignity, as became his stature and
position, although there was enough Of
1t to have put three smaller men asleep
or crazy drunk.
The first bull came into the ring and,
after passing through the usual tests
of plea, capa and banderilla, was deft-
ly killed by the chief bull fighter, or
matador, with one thrust through the
heart.
1t was all done in the most approved
style Of the art, but Mike, who had
once worked in a slaughter house In
Kansas City, viewed the whole proceed
ings with contempt and disdain.
THAT amt no way to kill bull!" he
growled. Let me get in that ring, and
I'll show 'em how we do 1t in Kansas
CITY,"
No sooner thought Of than done. He
forced his way into the inclosure which
in every bull ring serves as a sort OF
greenroom for the performers, and,
walking up to the picador, who was
already mounted and ready to go into
the ring, calmly pulled him from the
saddle, regardless Of the indignant pro-
tests and threats Of the man and his
fellow performers. Then, dressing HIM
self in the picador's costume, which he
plucked from its rightful owner very
much as one picks a chicken, Mike
leaped into the saddle and, lance In
hand, rode out into the ring, where his
train crew of Mexican shovel experts
recognized him by his great bulk and
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Way Above Her.-It was during the
rush hour last Saturday night. A man
and a girl got on an Euclid avenue
car at the public square and succeed
ed in getting whole s:at. Then the
car filled up, and the standee opposite
that seat couldn't help hearing part OF
the conversation which was low. but
impassioned. The young man appear
ed to be pleading for something; the
girl was evidently demurring.
"Please!" he whispered, but she
shook her head. At 40th street he
was still begging, and then she grew
firm-nay, naughty.
mo" she said. II cannot. might,
Harold. but your station is too far
above my own!"
He tool; that for false humility, but
the event proved that she spoke the
truth, for she got off at 55th street,
while he went on to 105th.-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

No Such Luek.-A certain man
stayed out much later at night than
his wife liked and as he would never
tell her where he had been she got
their little boy to ask him.
One morning at breakfast the
youngster said, Dad, where were you
last night?"
well. II you must know, I was sit
ting with a sick friend"
"Oh! Did your sick friend die?"
What an absurd question! OF
course he didn't die"
"Oh. but did you hold your sick
friends hand?" ..
No" answered the father, "how
foolish you are! OF course I didn't"
And then he added. with a faraway
look in his eyes, II wish to heaven
had. He held four aces" london
Opinion.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Answer Was correet.-Mayor Lew
Shank of Indianapolis, was charged
with speeding in his automobile not
long ago. The trial was held before
a country justice Of the peace, and
was considered comedy occasion,
says the Washington Herald.
"Now," asked the prosecutor OF one
witness, a policeman. 'ff the magnetic
on an auto were not in harmony with
the differential and the transmission
and clutch interfered, what would be
the effect on the speed Of the car In
case all six cylinders were attached
to the spark plug?"
Shank's counsel, Joseph w. Healing,
objected to the question on the ground
that 1t was too technical. They ar
gued back and forth about whether
the witness should answer.
"I can answer 1t in my own way"
volunteered the witness.
"Oh, very we'll, then; II you can an
swer, go ahead" agreed Healing. And
this was the answer:
j"I do not know"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

received him with storms Of applause.
The legitimate and duly accredited bull
fighters looked on in state Of semi
stupefaction from the greenroom door.
The bull was a good one and appear
ed to be suffering from a distinct
grievance as he rushed into the ring
like a roaring lion. 'r. '
Mikes huge bulk on the starveling,
weak -kneed mustang was the most
prominent object that met his eyes,
and without a moments loss Of time
he charged.
In an instant the sharp point of the
garocha Qance) was in his shoulder,
and Mike gracefully and easily-thanks
to his: wonderful strengthened the
bull off, although his mount had a mar
row escape from fall.
viva Don Miguel, Nuestro maquin-
ista!" howled the gravel train gang in
chorus. Bully for you, Jumbo"
shouted Tom Foley q fellow Irish
American, above the din.
stick him again, Moike. Stick him
again!" came In rich. sonorous accents
from. Paddy Cafferty, the boss Of the
steam shovel outfit, while the rest Of
the crowd gave vent to yells OF mar
ticulate enthusiasm. ras H|
Discounted by the sharp reception
he had met with, the bull retired few
yards and there stood paving and
tossing his head, half frightened by the
pandemonium on all sides Of him.
Mike, gracefully raising both hat and
lance in salute, acknowledged the ap-
plause that was being showered upon
him. So, ...-. ..r.....
Quick as a flash the bull saw his
chance, rushed in under his guard, and
threw horse and rider over his back.
the horse, in falling, pinning Mike to
the ground by his left leg.
Fortunately Mike was unhurt, al
though the poor horse was finished. As
the bull retired slightly with lowered
head, preparatory to another charge,
Mike extricated himself with a mighty
pull from beneath his fallen charger
and stood up. There was no time
either to run or dodge. The bull had
the right Of way, and was coming
with the throttle wide open," as Mike
described 1t afterward. A head-on
collision, or something very like 1t, was
bound to happen in less than a second.
But Mike was equal to the occasion.
AS the bulls horns came within
reach of his long arms, he grasped
horn in each hand and with a light
ning-l like twist, impossible to describe
and requiring Herculean strength and
great skill to accomplish, threw the
animal to the ground with a broken
neck! II
Amidst round after round OF wild
applause, while money, cigars, silk
handkerchiefs. and even somoreros
were thrown into the ring by the en-
thusiastic devotees Of bull-1ghting,
Mike placed his foot on the head OF
the fallen monarch Of the range and,
laying one hand on his breast and rails
ing the other aloft In graceful imita-
ton of the Spanish bull-f1ghters GUS
tom, turned inquiringly toward the
judges stand. The Judge nodded gra-
ciously, and moment after the crier
announced that the dead bull was the
property of Don Miguel" for his
prowess in having performed an un-
heard-o feat In bull-flghting.-Wide
World Magazine.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Natural Suspieion.-The kindly old
man stopped to watch a wee tot who
was diligently searching the sidewalk
for something and at the same time
sobbing loudly.
What have you lost, little girl?"
he finally ventured.
boo. hoo!" came the reply between
sniffles, 1--WE lost my nickel"
Touched by the child's grief, the old
man extracted a scent piece from his
pocket, pressed into the little tots
palm and said:
There. there, little girl, here's your
nickel Now, stop crying"
To his surprise, the child flashed on
him a look Of bitter contempt.
why, you wicked old man." she
said, stamping her tiny foot, you had
my nickel all the time!"-St. Louis
Post-Dispatch.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
Rock Hill. S. c., Feb. 81, 191

Rock Hill, S. c., Feb. 81, 1918.
Dear Miss Russell:
We have been reading the story in
our books, How the Oak Tree Be-
came King" Our Wandering Jew is
growing fine.
Wylie and Charlie are learning
their one, two, three's now, and the
other little boys are learning the
words. We appreciate the pictures
you gave us Christmas. We have
nineteen scholars today. We were
glad when st. Valentines day came
but there were not many here.
We have started to making Easter
cards now. We have planted some
sweet peas in a box, and we have some
bulbs in the house blooming. We
have our bear house yet. We have
started a new story now.
Your friend,
Florence Garrison,
Ebenezer School-Third Grade.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Humor in Prison.-Sheriff Harburg-
er tells story which he picked up on
a recent trip to Sing Sing prison.
A prisoner newly committed to the
prison was given a position in the
lock-step line behind an inmate who
had been there for some time. The
following conversation was overheard:
Said the older inmate to the new
recruit: How long did they give you,
partner"
"Oh, 1 got a raw DEAL" replied the
newly arrived one. I'm in for ten
years."
why, you've got nothing to kick
about" said the former. Just tip me
off when you get out. I want you to
do an errand for me."-New York
Journal.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Seeing Into Space.-With his forty
foot reflector Sir William Herschel
perceived stars whose light, he cor
cluded, had occupied 100000 years in
reaching the earth says the Chicago
Tribune.
His belief that he had seen further
into space than any other human be
ing before him Is now pronounced d
just one by that noted astronomer. DR.
T. J. ]. See. The visual power OF
Herschels telescope is somewhat sur
passed by modern instruments, and
much additional power is given to the
modern instrument by the use Of pho
Biography. But on the other hand we
now have to take account Of the ex-
tinction of light by cosmical dust in
space.
Neglecting this. Herschel slightly
over-estimated the distance to which
his telescope could penetrate. With
our greatest modern instruments and
the use Of photography, 1t Is certain,
Doctor See tells US, that we can OBJ
serve stars at distance Of over 2,000,-
900 light years. 1t Is very probable
that we can penetrate to a depth of
about 100000 light years. A modern
silver glass reflector Of twelve feet
aperture would give about six times as
much light as the sixty-inch reflector
at Pasadena gives.
With this gain Of two magnitudes In
light power it might be possible to
penetrate into space at least twice the
present distance, or Of depth from
which the light takes 100000 years
to reach the earth. The depth to which
we can penetrate is simply a question
of telescope power, which can be vast
ly but not indefinitely increased. AT
the present time a twelve-foot reflec-
tor Is possible.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
Eetters FROM The Schools.
by Miss Leila A. Russell.
Rock Hill, S. c., March 4. 1913.

y
Dear Boys and Girls:
The County Teachers association at
its meeting last Saturday decided to
observe County School Day on April
IL. at Winthrop college. The pro-
gramme has not been arranged as yet,
but there are some things you can do
to get ready for it. In the first place
try to get every boy and girl In your
school and all your fathers and moth
ers to come. 1t would be fine II In the
procession formed on the campus, each
school carried a banner with the name
of the school on it. Remind your
teacher to make out the average at
tendance for your school when this
month is up and see what per cent
this Is of the enrolment. When she
has done this she must send 1t to Mr..
Carroll, and the school having the
highest per centage will be given a
banner on County School Day. Would
you not like to see your school win this
banner?
If you have read six books during
the year I want your teacher to send
me your name and the names Of the
books you have read. On County
School Day we want to read the names
Of the boys and girls who have done
this much reading.
torical events connected with York
county about which you children might
write very entertainingly, have Won
dered why some Of the Guthriesvflle
or McConnellsviile pupils did not write
of Huck's defeat The Cotton Belt
children ought to be interested in tell
ing Of the origin Of the name Of the
road near their school. believe 1t is
the Adair's Ferry road. Could not
some of you children in Fort Mill
township tell us why Fort Mill is so
named? The Forest Hill high school
stands just where Billy HilPs iron
works were during the Revolutionary
war; The boys and girls Of this school
might find out some very interesting
things about this old gentleman and
his Industry. Any Of these suggested
topics would be Of interest to the
children of all the schools.
Yours very sincerely,
Leila A. Russell.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Rock Hill, S. c.. Feb. 9th, 1918. s
Dear Miss Russell: --E %
will write and tell you what we
have been doing up here. The small
er girls have been making doll hats
out Of raffia, and they were very pref
ty. The larger ones have been max
ing some hand bags out Of cord. They
are pretty too. The little boys have
been making coffee-mats out Of raffia
to set a coffee pot on.
We have some pretty flowers bloom
Ing in the house. We have some
Wandering Jew, and some bulbs, both
In large glasses, and they are so
pretty. r
The third grade has some sweet
peas planted in a big box. They put
them in water first and let them
sprout. Then they planted them In
rich earth.
The college girls gave a play out
here on the fifteenth Of this month. It
was pretty good. I wish you could
have been here to see 1t. Come back
to see us sometime again soon.
Your friend,
Alberta Garrison.
Ebenezer School-Sixth Grade.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
BUYING A BUGGY


You don't buy vehicle for a day or
week, but for year or perhaps for
years. Then, lis up to you. to get
the best possible VALUE for your
money. We sell Buggies, and we be-
lieve they are good Buggies-Certain-
ly as good as can be built and sold at
the prices we offer them. The TYSON
& JONES Buggy has been sold on this
market for years, and Is favorably
known to buggy buyers and users. 1t
is built Of good material, thoroughly
well finished and capable Of sustain
ing long service. If you expect to buy
a Buggy, see US before you buy.
MULES
II you have visited cur stables you
know that we have Mules that are as
good as have been brought to this
market, and you also know that our
prices are as reasonable as prices can
be made. Before you buy that Mule
come and talk the matter over with US.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
Rock Hill, 8. c., Feb. 81. 1918.

Rock Hill, 8. c., Feb. 81, 1913.
Dear Miss Russell: ....
We are having a good time playing
Hide and Seek" and "Goosie Gan
der"
We have made bags of cord, a book
case, match-scratchers, rugs, AMI
calendars.
hope you had a good time in CO.
lumbia seeing the corn, wheat, oats,
cows and apples. The play the col
lege girls gave was fine and they had
a pretty good crowd Of people. They
made $18 and something over.
Our teacher has read to us about
Washington" and the Tortoise and
the Rabbit" E'- 81
Your friend,
John Edgar Fewell.
Ebenezer Schools years old.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

In Their Steps.-"Look here. now
Harold" said father to his little son,
who was naughty, IF you don't say
your prayers you won't go to heaven.
II don't want to go to heaven" Sob
bed the boy; Il want to go with you
and mother."-New Orleans Times
Democrat.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
PLEASE PAY UP

7 CANNOT possibly get round to all
i the subscribers to THE ENQU1R-
Err on my club before the close Of the
contest. / respectfully request all who
have not already done so to please pay
the subscription price at once, either
to me or at The Enquirer office.
l4tf A. w. MCFARLAND.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

sg The Village Grocer-what are you
running for, sonny?
The Boy-Tm trying to keep two fel.
lers from flghtin'.
The Village Grocer-Who are the
fellows?
The Boy-Bill Perkins and me-
Puck.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

aT Better a man who fails than one
who never tries.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
j. 8. BRICE.
AT LAW
subseriptions for The Enquir.r.

Present subscribers to The Enquirer
who desire to renew. or prospective
subscribers who would like to have the
paper until January /. 1914. at the
price of a years subscription. should
see one Of the following clubmakers:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

,tB Great Britain's textile mills en-
ploy more than 100000 persons.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
SMOAK-BROWN co.
BEFORE BUYING
MULES OR HORSES

COME TO SEE US. We have a
First Glass lot of Stock and as we
bought to sell we are going to sell and
are here to make prices that WILL
INTEREST THE BUYER.
We can satisfy nearly every buyer
in size and quality and sell you ami
mails that are in perfect shape.
Don't buy until you see what we
have to offer and hear Cur prices. 1t
will pay you to come to Glover to see
us before you buy.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07
EASILY DECIDED.
This Question Should Be Answered
Easily BY YorlvilIe People.

Easily by Yorkville People.
i Which is wiser-to have confidence
In the opinions Of your fellow citizens.
of people you know, or depend on
statements made by utter strangers
residing in far-away places? read the
following:
r. j. Mackorell, wholesale grocer,
Main st., Yorkville, 8. c., says: For
about q year I had attacks Of back
ache and the secretions from my kid
neys were unnatural. decided to try
a kidney remedy and getting a sup
ply of Doan's Kidney Pills at the
York Drug Store, ! began using them
have since felt mucf better and my
pains and aches have disappeared en-
tirely."
For sale by all dealers. Price, 30
cents Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo,
New York. sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name-Doan's-and
take no other. -
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1913-03-07

Ebenezer Schools years old.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1913-05-16
Jr. Order Program

Program of the meeting OF the
r. O. U A. M at Piney Level
June 7. 1918, To be participated
in by Piney Level. ChilhoWee'
Wildwood, Unity, Block House.
John Sewer and Tabor Councils.
Called to order 9:80 a. M.
Music
Devotional Exercise Rev. Atchley
Music
The Jr. Order and the Home
(a) The Moral Influence by Rev.
j. o. Cox. Prof c. W Henry,
Music
M The Financial Protection by
T. F. Wallace Jr G. Q. Haggard'
(c) The Religious Influence by Jno,
NJ. Waters, Rev R. E. Ayers,
Music
Dinner
100 called to order with music.
The Jr. Order and Our Schools oS
I'M. V. Lowry, Prof. H. B. Mccall
Music
The Jr. Order and The Bible oS
Revs. J. w. Browning. John Sar q
ers
Music
The Jr. Order and Our Communit!
by M. A. James Esq. Jack Frow ESQ
Hon, M. H. Gamble.
Music
Benedictlon
The public are cordially invited t
attend. Dinner on the ground brin
your basket we'll filled.
J. L. Wells
A. M. Millsap;
D. A. Lawson
Committee
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1913-05-16

This wor needs eadrrs more
than II needs any other breed OF
men. Every line of activity calls
for Leaders-every hone. every
business, everv town. every nation.
As long as there are people there
will b. plenty to follow The de-
mand is for those who can Lead.
Be Leader
The greatest asset in Leadership
is courage, towards never Lead
Leadership requires great patience.
No one will follow an irritable OF
impatient Leader. Leadership re-
ouires tact, fairness and confidence.
One man can't Lead another who
distrusts his leadership Many
other things are important but these
things are imperativee- Be Leader.
A Leader must inspire and wake
up the sleeping POWERS in his
followers. To be able to do this ne
must himself have a clean CONSTANT
record. A man cant command
without authority, a man can T STIR
other people without first being
STIRRED himself aud becoming
his own MASTER. Be Leader
1t is just as important to be 8
Leader in your own home or towr
as to be Leader in your country
Il ism t the special station in which
J a man Leads that makes his worl
8 important but it's HOW he Leads
c This thing is true-that If you Lea
g we'll in the little affairs OF life yo
I can't keep from becoming a Leade
ia the big affairs. Exchange.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1913-05-16
Our Position

A few weeks ago we published an
article in which we made the state
ment that there was a movement on
foot to have our newly elected board
Of Mayor and Aldermen to pass
ordinances which would allow what
IS known asa wide open Sunday
also it seems that some want soft
drink stands to open in our city
We mean by soft drinks not our
soda fountain drinks which are
handled by our drug stores, bakery
and other business men. but IN
other words a saloon like Knoxville
il full of at the present time.
It can be said to the credit OF the
new board that there is not a man
On the Board who will stand for or
sanction such a move. MAryville is
known far and wide for being a
clean moral town, free from most oil
the vices that great many OF our
neighboring towns are afflicted with
Maryville is home town, with its
churches ard schools, a sate place
for bows and girls. We shall oppose
and fight with all the power at oul
command any move to desecrate the
Sabbath, or bring in our mlds
dance halls, pool rooms, soft drini
stands etc. We have always don'
everything in our power to aid an'
assist every enterprise or industr!
that knocks at our door for admis
sion, and will always be found Il
the front ranks for Maryville ant
Blount County and her citizens.