The Topeka state journal., 1913-09-23
by THE WAY
BY HARVEY PARSONS.

Murphy Ito follow the alleged English
language. In a ten-minute converse
ton with a local man of prominence
and foresight Che is also near-and-far
FAM, we gathered that Chief Myers
was a poor Jew because he didn't rake
N'Yark for a higher salary and, eigh-
teen seconds later, when the converse
tion had subsided to a local nature, he
swore by his three favorite gods that
Sam Friedberg was good Indian
dyaknowa bout-that? Poor Jew
Good Indian Indian, Jew. Where do
we draw that fine line between Poor
Jew and Good Indian?
Or, for that matter Good Jew and
Poor Indian. Take day off and ns-
ure it out for yourself
Some sweet day." says Jack Supp,
Il shall move to a country where 1t Is
not incumbent upon worker TO pur-
chase a hunting license before looking
into a gun store window
There are still two chances for swol-
len fortunes, regardless of all the anti
trust law and other political bunk:
they 60 to the two men who invent a
cure for hay fever and an odorless
brand of booze
After hearing a long argument with
no ending. Hondo Murphy was con-
strained to offer: Nineteen years ago
I was out in a small sloop on the Gulf
of Mexico with assorted company
but all real fighters from the ground
up and ready to fight at the drop OF
the handkerchief. The party consisted
of myself-the only outsider-and a
Parent and three Sons. One Son-the
older. and late of a gang of outlaws In
Oklahoma-was imparting information
to the brethren. He spoke feel1nsly OF
the electric lights of Kansas City. An
other brother cut in to describe an lee
tric light to the rest of US He out
lined it as an element that came
through a string from the wall, and
didn't have to be lighted.
Yer wrong there. Jawn, says the
sophisticated brother. it comes through
a 1eedle iron rod on the ceelin' and yuh
light it with a match-I seen 'em light
it in Kansas City
'Aw, jump offn thuh jibboom,' says
John. You needn't think We're so dang
green down yere: I seen 'em in Tamper
and they don't use no match to light
EN-
In three seconds there was a per-
fectly good fight on board boat
thirty-two feet long, nine feet wide
and ten miles from shore. The
younger brother. Benny, had sided
with the ignorant brother as against the
Oklahoma gunman who had seen 'em
in Kansas City when the good old par
ent, who was Union guerilla during
the KanSa Missouri border troubles
and could out-shoot any one of the
party and whip all his sons at one sit
ting. took chips.
Boys, chillern, yelled the old man,
this amt nuthin tub fight over. You
Benny an Jawn; remember that this
yere Electricity business has been
maxim rapid strides in Improvement.
How-ja- know they amt burnin' it in
common kerry-seen lamps now?'
The wisdom of pap broke up the
row, and undoubtedly saved one or
more lives. Remember the case when
you argue sure thing. Maybe there
has been an improvement since your
day"
DR.. Stubbs- of Chicago 4fcquits the cat
of carrying microbes from one place to
another We, ourself. have always held
that the flea was not a microbe but
vegeta Bile.
Notice to any foreign power: The
Chautauqua season has closed and un-
til he can frame up a booking for the
Orpheum vaudeville circuit. Mr.. Bry-
ans address will be State Department.
a n OFT