davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
This HonesMnde Cough
Syrup U'iu Surprise You
Stops Even WhOOplng Cough
Quickly. A Family Supply
Mt Small Cost.

Here Is home made remedy that
takes hold Of a cough instantly, and will
usually cure the most stubborn case in
"a hours. This recipe makes a pint
enough for a whole family. You couldn't
buy as much or as good ready-made
cough syrup for $3.50.
Mix one pint of graduated sugar with
4 pint Of warm water, and stir 2
minutes. Put 212 ounces of Pinex fifty
cents WORTH in q pint bottle, and add
the Sugar Syrup. This keeps perfectly
and has a pleasant taste-children like
it. Braces up the appetite and is slightly
laxative, which helps end cough.
You probably know the medical value
of pine in treating asthma, bronchitis
and other throat troubles, sore lungs,
etc. There is nothing better. Pinex is
the most valuable concentrated compound
of Norway white pine extract, rich in
guaiacol and all the natural healing pine
elements. Other preparations will NOT
work in this formula.
The prompt results from this inexpen-
sive remedy have made friends for it in
thousands of homes in the United States
and Canada. which explains why the
plan has been initiated often, but never
successfully.
A guaranty of absolute satisfaction. or
money promptly refunded, goes with this
recipe. Your druggist has Pinex, or viii
got it for YOU. If not. send to The
PineX Co., Fl. Wayne, Ind.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

into the very best part of the pIav.
right at the end where the fellow IS
going to give the girl a good kiss and a
good squeeze, and the old man is so
happy to find that the young fellow IS
all right and the funny man is funniar
than ever
That wouldn't go in the old days,
Nowadays they won't even let fcl.
low die in peace. The audience is m
its feet sIau,ming seats around and
rushing out for the lobster feed before
the hero brcathes his last noble mes
sage.
In the old days they would have
slaughtered a man for that! They
used to take a death scene seriously.
once ! knew an old doctor who
went to the theater and there was a
woman on the stage who in the play
was supposed to have taken poison. ana
they didn't know what to do for her.
The old doctor stood it as long as he
could and then jumped up and yelled:
| Here, YOU idiot. Give her coffee.'
The people used to take books more
seriously, too, in the old days.
"One man said he wouldn't read such
a book as oliver Twist When he
came to the place where Oliver was
caught again he was so mad at Dick
ems for letting oliver get caught that
ne threw the book out of the window
and vowed he would never read the old
thing!
Nowadays the more misery poor
creature is led through the more enjoy
able the story is supposed 70 be and the
greater the sales. But that sort OF STUFF
didn't get any of the old timers money.
That shows how wise they were in
the old days What do We care about
art Humbus. There wasn't mu.h
art in tine old-f3shiourd huedoun. but
there was real fun in il, just TN.
same"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
How He Was Cured Of His
Contempt of the Law

but to me it is a sad duty. l have to
pronounce judgment on a man whom 1
honor and respect for an offense which
is absolutely against his nature and
character. You. the most peace-loving
and kindest man I have ever met, as
saulted an innocent man in the street
without the slightest provocation. The
testimony showed that y..u were abso-
lutely sober. Then you broke several
windows also while perfectly sober.
and now you openly, in the middle Of
the day, break every window pane in
the court house in the most cool and
systematic manner.
Finding that this is your fourth Of
Tense l really ought to sentence you to
hard labor, but can not do this as long
as / am in doubt to the state of your
mind II looks to me like intermittent
insanity, and as a friend, l beg you To
give me an explanation if you have
one"
Signor Capano, to tell the truth, did
not look the least bit repentant while
his friend, the judge, addressed him. but
rather seemed TO enjoy the whole mat
| ter immensely. The last words evil
IDENTIFY impressed him, however and he
took his friends hand and said:
Il feel | must tell you that there is a
pades and breaches of the law, which
| do not care to explain in open court
You know my wife, Angelina. The
name suits her TO perfection. for she Is
really an angel. She is not quite well,
however, and when her health began TO
fail l could not make her see special
ist.
Her sickness takes the form that
occasionally she is subject to an attack
of bad temper, and for about week she
is a perfect shrew. II is simply impos-
sible to live with her while the attack
lasts. Several years experience has
taught me that her attacks are always
preceded by certain symptoms which
warn me OF what Is coming
His Jail Sentence.
From my childhood l have always
loved my native town and hated travel
ing, so never could make up nv mind
to leave San Severino. I'd rather spend
a week in jail here than stop the same
length of time In the finest hotel in Ma
pies
Now, this is the true reason why
do something to get into prison once a
year. and I now beg you TO do your
duty"
The Judge smiled.
And when do YOU expect your wife'S
attack 10 begin? It is about a week
since you broke our windows, you
know"
Il feel it will come tonight"
Then please follow me into the court
ROOM"
When the procedure was over the
judge said:
Knowing a ! do that Signor Capa-
nos domestic affairs are such that his
offenses will not cease If l simply SEN
tence him to Jail, | herewith sentence
| said Signor Capano to eight days ar
rest I'm quarters. that is to say, begin
ming with tonight, followed by eight
| days in the common jail
Trapped" said Capano, as he en-
erged from his prison cell two weeks
| later and shook hands with the judge.
| You have cured me-" he went on, and
| l have made up my mind that one
| whole years happiness is not too'deary
| bought with one weeks troubles"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Her Favorite.

The other Sunday evening. when
church service was over, young min
lister started on his journey home, ac-
companied by two young ladies of the
choir when they began a conservation
about hymns.
"Whst is your favorite hymn" asked
the curate, turning to one of his fair
companions.
"'Draw me nearer" she replied, not
thinking Of the double meaning.
At that moment her companion, who
was walking on the other side of the
curate, to make matters worse, said, in
nocentlyG
THAT IS only the chorus: the COM
mencement of the verse is, 7 am
thine'"
At this the curate laughed heartily,
and the ladies are always very careful
now when talking about hymns.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Daysey Mayme
and Her Folks
sv FRANCES L. GARsIDE.

-HE claim made by a professor in
Columbia college that the rod
should be restored to its place of
ehuor in the public schools has caus d
yAs friends OF prattling babes to organ
~ a society called THE Society of the
Anti-Spanks," with Mrs. Lysander John
,Anoietou for president.
"This" she said, at the initial meet
srS "is not my first expression against
IA use OF the rod. Several years age,
,S3AAn a Peace Commission meeting al
THE Hague voted in favor of universal
disarmament, I promptly obeyed by
taking down the switch that hung be-
f7ipd the kitchen door"
There <Vereyspeeches by many women
resting on mothers to arise and stand
Tetween their innocent babes and the
reach tree limb; there were addresses
frat ceused women to weep as if at a
matinee or a funeral.
As last a man arose. Concealed by
Ga forest of feathers on the hats in
;arout OF HIM, Mrs. Appleton did not
,oapcajVe 1t was her husband until the
xnsschtef was done.
as prelude he gave nervous cough
behind his hand.
SThe trouble" he said, with that col
tsse professor is that he does not go
4laok far enough. When a man enters a
hone these days he is given over to the
children TO play with. They climb over
hirn, they shoot him with their toy
guns, they hit him with their bats. and
smear raspberry Jam In his whiskers.
ghe man has heard all his life that All
GOOD Men Love Children, and so pre-
tends that he likes to have molas ses
candy put down his collar and his bald
spot made a repository for chewing
gum If he talks he has to scream to
be heard above the dear little children's
prsttle and if as much as a CLEAN of
resentment shows in his eyes when one
Of these Dear Little Ones uses his
watch for a hammer. its parents hate
him forevermore.
THAT professor did not go back far
enough. He should have advocated
the whip for some of you fool moth
srs-' but Lysander John was heard no
more!
Take a tip from Father" whispered
Lysander John, through his bandages
and his poultices to his son, that night,
and never tell the truth to a woman"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
% He Had to Quit Smoking 90

One word led to another, and the
new word led to trouble. The Podders
went to bed that night with visible
GOODNESS between them. Mrs. Fodder
had faced her husband with the die
tum: You've just got to be more care
full. | can't go around and watch you
all the time Fodder had answered not
at all.
He'd Have to Quit.
Next morning Fodder went to his
office without his regular goodbye kiss
and Mrs. Fodder went about her house
hold duties with a face that wore the
semblance of a thunder cloud. But
along in the morning her fTown relaxed
into smile, and It was with a bright
and shining countenanCe that she
dressed and caught a car for down
town.
Meanwhile Fodder in his office had
been fighting a battle with himself and
had been winning #.
AT last he rose. went around to the
desks of his fellow clerks and declared
himself. He wanted to burn his bridges
behind him. and he did. His fellow
clerks We're more or less skeptiCal, but
he did not care.
He meant to show them.
That evening Fodder entered the
'front.' door OF ms home breeZllN and
greeted his wife with a shout and a
smile. even as Mrs Fodder was throw
ing her shapely arms around his neck.
And you'll never guess what | got
downtown for you today cooed Mrs.
Fodder. It's going to be for your birth
day, even if it is little bit early, be-
cause it was so expensive. It's a new
pipe with a cap so that the old Goals
can't fall out and make trouble
Fodder sighed and seemed not too
happy.
Fodder, her mouth beginning to trem-
BILE. What's the natter
Nothing worth Mentioning re-
sponded Fodder without any signs Of
intense joy only told them all at the
office today that I had quit smoking.
And III have to keep my word. because
they said l couldn't"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

of smoking" said the
patent lawyer, reminds me
of young Fodder If there was
one thing more than another that
young Fodder liked to do it was to
please his wife. even as Mrs. Fodder
liked to please him above all other
things. Either could have pleased the
other best by allowing that other to
be the cause of the couples pleasure.
Each kept toward the other an attitude
of strained attention.
The couple were temperamentally
opposite-which in all probability ac-
counted for their marriage. Mrs Pod
der was changeable in the extreme
vacillating and without any fixed pur-
pose. Fodder never Wavered after his
mind had once been made up.
Fodder had been assured by his wife
that he might, without fear of censure,
continue the practice of any ha bits he
had contracted before their marriage.
He had the good sense to refrain from
coming home at later hour than nee
essary, but he felt that. I'm view Of the
sacrifice. he might be allowed to keep
and smoke his pipe.
The Cause of the Trouble.
1T was the pipe that was RESPONSE
PIE Tor the trouble. Fodder usually
smoked i'm a big chair, which stood in
the living room alongside a small ia
BILE. From time to time he would take
his pipe from his mouth and lay It
down on the table. He would always
pick it up again before it had time to
go out. on the table was costly, ar
ustic cover which had been presented
to the Podders by maiden aunt of
the brides.
"On one fateful evening Fodder laid
his pipe down with more than usual
emphasis. Something in the newspa-
per he was reading so engrOssed his
attention that he had eyes for nothing
else. A small red coal rolled out of the
bowl of his pipe and rested upon the
precious table cover. 1t was Mrs, Pod
der who presently followed her nose
and thereby discovered the cause of the
odor of burning linen.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Up-to-Date Jokes
BY PeJWtSSI0H Qf tie Editor.

Nervous Lady Passenger Gin the
train after passing a temporary BRIDGE
Thank goodness, we are now on terra
frma!
Funny Man-Yes, ma am-less terror
and more firmer.
Family Physician-I am afraid YOU
have been eating too much cake and
sweetstuff. Let me see your tongue.
Little Girl-Oh, you can look at it,
but it won't tell
First Traveler-Why is that pompous
fellow strutting about so absurdly?
Second Traveler-He found some
ham in his railway sandwich.
Wife-How does my new spring hat
look, Tom?
Hub-Um! 1t looks to me like two
weeks salary.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

Elizabeth" writes: kindly publish
again the prescription for stomach dis
orders and constipation. | have mis-
placed the letter giving the ingredi-
ents."
Answer: Go to your druggist and ask
for tablets triopeptine and take ac-
cording to directions, and you viii soon
be entirely cured of all stomach trou-
BILE and constipation. This is the best
treatment known for all kinds of stom-
ach trouble.
Anna" says: ~ am nervous, hys-
terical and very thin due to overwork.
What can I take to regain my original
vitality
Answer: You will gradually regain
your original strength by using syrup
Of hypophOsphites comp. > oZs.; tine
ture cadOmenc comp. l oz. Mix and
take a teaSpoonful before meals This
is the best system tonic that l know Of.
Mrs. r. L. asks: Il am troubled with
a large gOitre. and am very HeShy; so
much so that am uncomfortable. What
do you advise me to do
Answer: Five grain arbolene tablets
should be taken regularly. If this Is
done your goitre and abnormal fat will
gradually be reduced. These tablets are
sold in sealed tubes, with full direc-
tons for home use.
y
recommend a remedy for kidney and
liver trouble | have dark spots before
my eyes, dizzy spells and also twinges
Of rheumatism.
Answer: ] have received many let
ters from people who have used the
following remedy and been cured of all
trouble such as you mention. Get
three grain sulpherb tablets mot sui
phur tablets, and take according to d.
rections given. They are sold at any
well-stocked drug store and are thor
oughly reliable.
Louis" Get the following prescrlp-
tiOn filed and give 10 to 10 drops in
water before meals to cure your little
boy Of bedWetting Comp fluid balm
wort. / on. tincture rhusaromatic 2
drains, and tincture cubebs. l dram.
, This should be given one hour before
meals.
Helen" writes: MY nostrils and
throat are badly affected with catarrh
ana my breath is very offensive | also
suffer a great deal with headache and
pain in my eyes. Can anything be done
to help me?'
Answer. Antiseptic Nilane powder
{ has been prescribed with great success
and the number of letters received daily
! from the hundreds Of grateful people
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
More of the Same.

A young wife recently went into a
grocer's shop and addressed the grocer
thus:
Il bought three or four hams here a
month or so ago and they were fine.
Have you any more of them?"
Yes, ma am" replied the grocer.
There are ten of those hams hanging
up there now"
We'll, If you're sure they're off the
same pig. I'll take three of them" re-
piled the young wife meeldy.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
Security.

\ crossing sweeper was trying to get
a gratuity from an exceedingly dandi-
fed individual, who. in refusing, urged
that he had no change-nothing but d
fve-pound note.
Il can get it changed for you, sir
said the yOungster.
On seeing the dandy hesitate, as if
from fear of trusting him with the
money. he added:
IT you doubt my honesty, hold my
hrush.n
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

A little town Of San nDe coverino - The sle
government provided no official
residence. and the apothecary of the
town, who was the only man who had
any apartments to let, had an old
grudge against all representatives of
the law
In this dilemma Signor Capano, to
the surprise of everybody. came to the
assistance of the young judge and gave
him possession of the top floor in his
splendid villa, thus winning the instant
gratitude of the Judge.
They soon became fast friends
spending all their evenings together,
smoking, drinking Chianti wine and
talking politics until after midnight.
A year had passed when case came
before the judge which embarrassed
him painfully. His dear friend and
landlord was accused of a serious Of
Tense, punishable bye at least eight
days imprisonment, and his hope that
the accused might prove himself limo
cent failed for Signor Capano did not
appear in court at all The case went
on, Signor Capano was convicted and
he himself asked to be permitted to
serve his sentence Immediately.
Contempt for the Law.
The judge was seriously annoyed, as
he felt sure this conviction would put
an end to their friendship, but his sup
position proved to be wrong, for, having
served his week in prison, Signor Ca
pano came up to the judges apart
ments as jolly and jovial as ever, and
never said a word about what had hap
pened.
The judge learned to like. Capano
even more than before. He was a
splendid fellow and an ideal friend.
But he did not like his evident con-
tempt for the law, so decided to find
out the reason Of his peculiar ideas.
This was not very difficult. The old
est juryman, who had lived in San Sew
erino all his life, told him a S soon as he
asked him about it.
why? II does not surprise anybody
here" he said. we are quite used to
seeing Signor Capauo go to Jail for a
week every year, but as for the reason
of this strange habit you must ask
somebody else. If Signor Capano were
eccentric in any way. this might eX-
plain it, but he is the most level-head-
ed and practical man | know"
The surprised Judge examined the
records Of the court and found that the
this, however, his reputation would be
ruined, so the judge decided to find the
cause and if possible, cure his friend
of his foolishness.
Signor Capano was once mora
charged with an offense, worse than
any of his previous ones. The judge
was seriously annoyed and wondered If
! his landlord were not the victim of
! intermittent attacks of insanity. This
| time he resolved to help him, no matt r
| what it would cost.
A Psychological Riddle.
He sent for him an hour before the
| court was set, pretending that he had
something of Importance to talk with
him about. SignOr Capano came and
his friends eyes rested searchngly on
his face
/ You are psychological riddle" the
| judge said. This business may have
| been easy enough to my predecessors
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
When Art Was Taken Seriously

XII DO not know whether people en-
joy the theater more than they
used to or not" remarked the
old timer, but they certainly do take
it differently.
Nowadays there is always a pro-
cession of hats and people breaking
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13

irug store. Any druggist can order of
wholesaler.
who have been cured of catarrh would
indicate its curative value. Get from
the druggist a tWo-OunCe original pack
age Of NilSne powder mix level tea
spoonful with an ounce of vaseine or
lard and apply well up In the nostrils
twice a day. Also use the following in
connection with the above to thoroughly
cleanse the nostrils. Use one-half tea
spoonful OF the Nilane powder to a pint
of warm water through the nostriIs
several times day and your catarrh
should be cured. To prevent return
this should. be used occasionally.
Tom NJ" writes: II am only TWEEN
" years old. but my hair is falling out
very rapidly. My scalp is covered with
dandruff. What can l get to cure it?"
Answer: To cure dandruff and stop
falling hair use plain yellow minyoi
This you can get at any we'll stocked
drug store in 4 OF. jars, and If used
regularly ii will cure any scalp disease
and prevent premature badness. Many
people have reported a cure by using
two or three applications.
u. w" writes: Il should be the
happiest woman in the world if / could
find true remedy to help me gain flesh
I have regular features. hut / am so
thin that | am homely Can YOU give
me prescription
Answer: ] receive daily so many
gratifying letters from users of three
grain hypO-nuCane tablets These little
tablets can be bought at any up to-da te
drug store III sealed packages. Fun di-
reCtionS are given. / advise that YOU
begin taking them at once and con-
tinue their use for several months and
you will gain flesh. Many people re-
port that a two months treatment will
Increase their weight from 10 to 30
pounds. Hlpo-Nuclane tablets will also
improve your complexion giving YOU
rosy checks and lips and an increased
sparkle to the eyes.
American Girl' writes: For some
years l have been troubled with rheu-
matism. l have tried almost every
cure but they did not help me
Answer: The best known prescrip-
ton for the cure Of rheumatism is:
Iodide of potassium. drams sodium
salicylate, drains; wine of colchicum.
y o.; comp. essence cardiol. c2
comp. fluid balmwort, ! o.. and syrurs
sarsaparllla, oZS. Mix by shaking
well in bottle and take a teaspoon
full al meal time and at bed time, and
you will not only be relieved. but cured.
if you continue its use for short time.
Frank S" writes II would like to
have the formula for a reliable cough
cure as l have a very severe cough
which is becoming very annoying
Answer: The best remedy that
know of for coughs and colds is made
by mixing a 252 %. bottle of concen-
trated essence mentho -laXene with A
ruiz directions on the bottle how to make
and use This will make a fun pint or
the finest and cheapest cough medicine
obtainable
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
A Psychological Riddle.

lie sent for him an hour before the
court was set, pretending that he had
something of Importance to talk with
him about. Signor Capano came and
his friends eyes rested searchingly on
his face.
You are a psychological riddle" the
judge said. This business may have
been easy enough to my predecessors,
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-03-13
BeD@ocToRs
YADVICEA
YDk: ZeSn5 .Bakcr- ~

The questions answered below are gen.
eraI in character, the symptoms or dis
eases are given ana the answers will APP
ply to any case of similar nature.
Those wishing further advice. free. may
address Or. Lewis Baker, College Bldg
College Ellwood SITS, Dayton, o.. enclos-
ing self-addressed stamped envelope for
reply. Full name and address must be
given but only initials or fictitious name
will be used in my answers The pre-
scriptions can be filed al any we'll stocked
drug store. Any druggist can order Of
wholesaler.
The Daily Missoulian. [volume] (Missoula, Mont.) 1904-1961, 1913-04-15
Sour Stomach.

This is a mild form of indigestion,
Eat slowly, masticate your FOOD thor
oughly and take one of Chamberlain's
Tablets Just after supper II it may
be avoided. For sale by all druggists.
The Daily Missoulian. [volume] (Missoula, Mont.) 1904-1961, 1913-04-15

Peter Carter of the Plains the
atorium exhibits his first moving pic
ture show at Doenges' hall Thursday
night, Mr.. Carter expects to give
regular performances Thursday and
Sunday evenings.
The Rebekahs gave their monthly
entertainment Saturday night, consist
ing of cards. fine lunch and dance.
They make a charge of % cents per
adult, and realized $3.50 at this en-
tertainment. Ed. Frazier won gem
tlemen's prize and Henry Florin the
ladies' prize by substituting for Mrs.
Ed Fitzgerald. who already had a
good score. Consolation prizes We're
awarded to Mrs. George l.. Sorensen
and Joe Florin.
The high water of Prospect creek
has caused the engineers some anxiety
concerning the electric power dam,
which a crew of men have been
strengthening for the past three days
and diVerting the waters from under
mining the upper conduit pipe.