Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1913-03-27
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Home Maker
EDITED BY
ALICE f. TALCOTT.

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Six Don'ts for Benefit of Mothers.
Haven't you seen mothers. not
only the young, inexperienced moth
ers, but women of mature years who
are old enough to know better, con-
stantly doing things to their children
that make you want to shake them
and if possible bring them to a sense
of realization of the error of their
ways?
Mothers will persist in allowing
themselves to grow old in feeling.
OF course, they cannot stay the pass
age of years, but they can keep
young in thought by making them
selves companion to their children,
joining in their play as well as the
more serious phases of their lives.
Mothers must take care not to let
themselves rust mentally. The grow
ing girl and boy who can have moth
er help him out of a tight place in
his lessons, or can come to her for a
clear answer to perplexing ques-
ton, rarely gets that disagreeable
know-it-all aid so common to young
America. Live over your own happy
school days with your children by
keeping apace with them in lessons
from the first grade to the day they
are graduated from high school. 1t
is only the foolish mother who lets
her children see they know more
than she does and feel that they can
not go to her for explanations and
advice.
Never try to force your children S
confidence. If you have tried to be
the chum of your child from the
start, the confidence will be given
unsolicited. Condolences that are
asked or demanded are always given
grudgingly and with a sense of re-
sentiment, when they are not refused
| altogether. Children never confide
willingly in an unsympathetic moth
er. The moment q child realizes he
will be criticised or scolded for the
little mistakes he makes, he will
hide everything possible from the
mother; but if he is sure of her
ready sympathy, the confidence will
be given unaskel.
Avoid allowing a child to see that
you are disappointed in him. There
is no surer road to self-consciousness
and the don't care attitude than if
the boy or girl feels that mother
thinks him failure. When you see
them tagging behird the other chill
dren in school work of play, be ready
with encouragement for better sue
cess next time and enough sympathy
to take the keen edge off the failure.
Men have gone down to the very
| dregs of life for not other reason
than because their mothers have lost
faith in them and have shown it all
too plainly.
On the other hand, don't think
your children are prodigies. Chill
dren usually know they are not the
human wonders their fond mothers
believe them to be, and when they
are constantly exploited they are
bound to be conscious of embarrass-
ment, and being under a strain show
to bad advantage. And if the child
agrees with the maternal opinion, he
becomes an insufferable bore and
disgustingly conceited.
Whatever you do or don't do, be
sure not to nag. There is no surer
love destroyer than a mother who
never lets up, who magnifies trifles,
who is a chronic fault-finder and
scold. Children of such a mother
are rarely found at home. They will
desert home, mother, family and
friends as soon as they are able to
make a way for themselves. The
girls will marry the first man that
proposes, be he suitable or not, or
else will run away to join a theatri-
cal company, and the boys-well, the
boys will knock about in the world
until they sink or demonstrate their
ability to swim.