The Washington times., 1913-02-01
Hank Andrews
Saturday Sermon

/ amt no preacher. Of course, but be-
lieve mel II was, there'd be sixteen
or so folks set up an rub their peeps
ers and ask: Where's the fire. or, what
make Of autymobile hit me? or some
thing like that. after I'd handed 'em q
jolt or two on how's to git alone
peaceable-Iike in this dreary old world
This world amt SO dreary in itself,
mind you, though, as some of the crit
ters that walks on IL would have you
believe. Most every newspaper that
tries to give .'all the news what Is
news runs articles about fights an
murders an thieves an bickerln's an
divorces, ct cetery, ct cetery, that cud
every one on 'em been got eroun' ef
folks sometimes would do just one
little thing that dom cost red cent
ner any trouble to speak of-an' that >
Jest to jine In an smile!
Now. there's smiles an smiles / dom
mean the dark, sneery, smirky kind
that the cartoon man puts on the VII
lain's face when he tells Claude Eclair
that he (the aforesaid yfllain) win have
revenge! ahrr-rr! er that the chee-ild
must diet nor yet the kind of sickly
imitashun of a grin that the near
statesman wears when he meets a con-
stitoont back home. whose vote he
to real, genoo-ine, dyed-in-the-wool, one
hundred per cent, sixteen karat, war
ranted-not-to-fade, guaranteed-under-
he-poor-food-and- smiles that
flashes out on the faces of some folks
c'May their tribe increaseTD like the
o'clock after an all-night drizzle, like
the lights of a big white damon on
an old blue necktie, like the glitter
of the pure snow under the noon-day
cleaner, like the warmy feelin' in a
politishun's heart when Woodrow tells
him two days before the inauguration
he can have two of his portfolios,
cause he's put on nominatin' his friends
to the cabinet SO long they's got mad
as soothes the little babe with a cuttin'
tooth. enlivens tn hearts o. bread-line
humanity. lfghtens the weary loads of
them what tolls, or brings hope into the
sick souls that's lost faith in men
smiles with love in 'en, that's tn kind
j mean. Get me?
Just durin' this past week Eve been
readin' bout some feller an his wife
what couldn't git along. her swattin'
him over tn head with tn skillet. an
in TIL eye with tn family album; an
bout two little cullud kids on F street
each other with a warranted
safety razor over some little
fool thing that they hadn't smiled
about; an, lot of Washington dress
I.
Wilson because he spilled their little
bees prevns to the March
festivities when they'd orter smiled L
think o sixty thousan' old soldiers |
gittin' their badly needed pension money
on time instead Of two weeks late: and |
so on, and so on. All this trouble just |
because folks don't jine in more an |
smile at one another
It takes some nerve to smile when |
your. wife whales you with tn skillet |
mentioned, er feller calls you mean !
name. or your pocketbook has been ,
bit, but that's tn. time of
all timesst' put the rule in practice. II
hubby d jest smile. that skillet would
go down where II belonged on tn No. s
Ideal gas range. an. into it some of
wifey's most appetizin' golden flap
Jacks that hubby likes; the kid with |
tn razor w'd divide his chewin' gum;
an tn dressmaker w'd ricollect that |
she c'dn't we handled all tll' work any
how on them ball dresses without
maxim a lot o. folks mad an losin' i
some o. her best year-roun' customers |
They'd just all orter smiled and seen
how much better things wuz that-a-
way.
When tn weather's wet an foggy. an |
yer stummfcks upside down: when |
folks is mean an hoggy. an old earth |
wears big frown: don't rush tn can !
ner cuss arorn kick IN cat = |
mile. but Kitchen yer belt-strap up a |
notch, an tho II hurts-iest smilei
REXFORD L. HOLMES.