davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
FIND JOKE HARD TO FORGIVE
Detective Burns Aroused Ire 81 Fe
male FelIow-Passensers, ana Also
Their Curiosity.

Detective w. J, Burns was blessed
by the pope the other day. Half a
dozen well.to.do ladies reading that
statement earnestly hoped that the
blessing lie a defective and insincere
one, because Burns played a joke on
them that they can never forgive.
They were fellow passengers with
him on the Mauretania.
Please. Mr.. Burns." they said to
him. pleadingly and working their
eyes, please make US speech in the
cabin this evening. Tell us about the
wonderful detectaphone."
So Burns did. All the cabin pas
sengers we're there. He explained to
them that the detectaphone could be
hidden almost anywhere.
in order to make my little talk a
convincing one" said he, Il had de-
Telephones hidden in every cabin
before came on board the boat.
Last night / listened for hours"
oh" said many ladies, springing
to their feet.
Then they remembered themselves,
and pretended they we're just fixing
their skirts and sat down again, and
from time to time pinched their
cheeks to restore their color. Then
Burns said it was all joke. The
various ladies laughed holloway. like
the breaking Of plates. When Burns
concluded they came to him, one at a
time. and eyed him sadly. and stood
in pensive poses. "a
Did you really?" they asked him.
He assured them that he had mere
~ been spoofing. They all said they
We're 50 Elad to hear that. They said
he didn't seem at Al. that sort OF q
man: Then they said: j
Dear Mr.. Burns"
Mr.. Burns inclined an ear.
what did that hussy in yellow
talk about last night?"
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
cameIs Are Not Even In K.

Whether sheep are any relation TO
camels the bureau Of forestry does not
attempt to determine, but 1t has dis
covered that sheep can 80 four and a
half months without water, except for
such moisture as they can get from
the dew and the Juices of forage
plants.
The constantly increasing demand
for grazing ground has forced forestry
officers to find places for as much
stock as can safely be admitted to the
forests. Therefore, they have tried.
apparently with success. the grazing
of sheep on ranges entirely destitute
iof water. The grazing season lasts
from June Is to October 331, and dur
ing this period of four and a half
months the animals on these ranges
do not get drinking water.
Under such conditions. according to
the forestry bureau. the sheep have
done extremely well. and last years
lambs from the Nebo national forest,
Utah, had an average weight at the
close Of the season of 6S pounds, which
is declared to be rather above the nor.
NAL weight.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
SinaIe Walnut Tree.

A walnut tree was sold in the mid
die west the other day for $3.50. Time
was when there we're thousands of
walnut trees In that same county. At
one and the same time there was a
conviction in the minds of men that
no fence rail was good enough for a
worm fence" except a rail split
from the very heart of a walnut tree.
A worm fence, be 1t known. is one OF
those fences made up Of obtuse an
giles and once defined by a man who
had put up good many as fence
that first goes andygogglin and then
goes andygigglin." But returning to
the increased cost Of walnut tree,
life is not going to be really worth hv'
ing until the economists discover some
way to get the high price tags afixed
while there are plenty Of trees Left To
hang them on.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
FOR PRESERVATION OF FISH
Russian Claims He Has Method Which
Is Far Superior to Those at
Present In Use.

The preservation OF fish is not sub
ject likely to be of intense interest to
the average men, and let 1t is one OF
considerable practical importance to
him. Few foodstuffs are SO prone to
rapid decay. and few are more dan
gerous when in that condition. Pic.
king and sailing, while reasonably
effective. seriously injure the natural
flavor of the fish, when they don't &C.
tually destroy 1t. Hence a new method
of preservation which keeps the fish
fresh and sweet and of unchanged
flavor for weeks or even months" is
something Of a discovery. This 10
what Prof. A. J. Danilevsky, a mem.
der of the Imperial Academy Of Rus
,sia, claims for his new method. And
his claims have been considered OF
enough importance to be given an
ofiicial test by the board of agriculture
land fisheries in London. and also by
the Tull Trawlers' and Fish Merchants
association. A Today test, contrc 'et'
by the latter organization. Is SAID to
have justified the professors claims,
and it is probable .h;,, he viii be given
the opportunity for a more extended
ldemonstr; 'iou of his process. Its cost
is said t. vary from 40 to so cents
per 200 pounds Of fish.-New Yorh
Post
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
Sign at Gettysburg.

July l, 1868, on Cemetery Ridge.
near Gettysburg, Pa. was posted this
sign:
"All persons found using firearms In
these grounds will be prosecuted with
the utmost rigor of the law"
For the failure to enforce 1t you
must blame old John Burns. for he
was the constable Of Gettysburg. but
the majesty of the law was himself
blazing away with borrowed gun.
And as accessory before the fact
you must indict the man who had the
shoe store, for he. and not Hooker,
Meade or Lee. brought on the battle
Of Gettysburg. A detachment of men
in blue with holes In their shoes came
into town to clean out the store, and
at the same time came a detachment
of gray with no shoes at all, and then
the village ordinance against the pro
miscuous use of firearms began to
go to pieces.-American Magazine.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
Virus sIauahters RahhjtA

Rabbits took possession OF the
cemetery at Rouen, France. and ate
up all. plants and flowers as fast a.
they were placed upon the graves.
The keepers called in hunters With
ferrets. but the burrows were almost
straight down, SO the ferrets could do
nothing Then some of the virus used
In Australia when the rabbits became
a pest was obtained. DIR. Lcir Of the
Rouen board of health inoculate6 sew
eral rabbits with it and turned them
loose in the cemetery. Eight days
later there were no rabbits in the
cemetery. All had died in their bur
rows.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
Trees Have Eyes and See.

A German scientist-it is amazing
that nearly all the amazing things
come from German scientists-says
he has discovered that trees have
eyes and see. Not only trees. but all
vegetable life; the grass. the ORCHID,
the onion, the ragweed and the Easter
lily.
The epidermic cells Of the leaves.
according to this German discoverer,
are merely SO many convex lenses
which record visual impressions much
as do the facets Of an insects eye. He
has succeeded. by means of miscro-
scopy and photography, in actually re-
producing the images which he has
found In the eyes" Of trees. They dc
not differ greatly from the images
formed In the eyes OF human beings.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
Where % the Watches COT

, What becomes of the watches? The
average man does not buy more than
about two or three watches in the
course Of his whole life, and yet the
manufacturers keep on making new
watches by the thousands. Who buys
them all?
; No statistics can answer the Ques.
'tion. What becomes of the old
watches? What did you do with the
one you discarded when you got your
present watch? Where is 1t now? 1t
was silver watch and 1t kept good
time for years-that old watch, the
predecessor Of the gold one that you
now possess. You had a strong af'
Election for it. You called it "she,
and sometimes in the solitude Of your
room, you may have caught yourself
saying a word or two to 1t aloud. The
watch certainly talked to you in the
middle of the night; Heinc's watch
corrugated Hebrew by the hour. The
old watch had kind of a ringing tick
like a riveting machine, and you could
hear 1t clear through the pillow. 1t
has sung you to sleep more than once,
But let's see-what in heavens name
became of it?
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
Two Kinds of Macaronl.

The new cook was helping her mis-
tress to prepare dinner. All went well
until the macaroni was brought out.
The cook looked with surprise as she
beheld the long white sticks. But
when they were carefully placed In
water she gave choking gasp.
did you say. missus," she said In
an awed voice, "that you were going
TO eat that?"
Eyes, Jane" was the reply; that
Is what intended to do. But you
seem surprised. Have you never seen
macaroni cooked before"
mo, ma'am." answered the cook. Il
amt. The last place ] was at they
always used them things to light the
gas with"
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
HAD RIGHT TO BE PRESENT
Critic Of Proposed Tariff Clause Tells
Rather Good Story TO Illus
trate q Point.

A. L. Hamilton, the leading MILL
merry expert OF America, complained In
New York about the tariff clause pro-
hibiting the importation for millinery
uses. of all wild bird feathers save
the ostrich's.
Mr.. Hamilton pointed out that many
game birds are killed for sport and
food, and that many other birds are
killed because they are pests. and he
asked why the Audubon societies
would have the feathers Of all these
birds wasted.
II represent the birds, Mr. Hamil'
ton" said an Audubon devotee. Il
speak for the birds. Whom do you
represent, and what right have you to
speak?"
II represent the millinery trade"
Mr.. Hamilton answered. 81 speak for
thousands who will be thrown out OF
work If this foolish clause goes into
effect. AS to my right to speak-well,
think I'm rather in the position OF
the department store proprietor.
"A department store proprietor in.
augurated in the basement ten-cent,
three-course luncheon for his workers
He thought one day he'd try the
luncheon himself, and accordingly he
hoped up on to a peg and called for
the soup. But the waiter, not know
ing him, said:
"'Oh, no, mister! You Amt in on
this You don't belong to this store.
I'm quite aware of that the pro
prietor answered, the store belongs
to me-" -
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19

ty; c. @. Davenport, Warren county.
Ohio county officers-L. u. Tich-
enor, President; Henry Pirtle. Sec
rotary; s. II. Bennett, Treasurer.
COUNTY BOARD OF EDUCATION.
Henry Leach, Chairman, Hartford,
Ky.
1. L. u. Tichenor, Hartford, Il. f..
ID. No. 8. ~
2. L. c. Hartford, Reynolds, Ky.
3. VI. s. Patterson, Olaton, Ky.
4. Il. l.. Afford, White Run. Ky.
). Richard Plummer, Taylor Mines,
Kentucky. 4
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
MeIba's Australian Home.

Nine Media has built for herself q
delightful retreat at Lilydale. one OF
the most picturesque localities near
her native Melbourne. She has limited
more than once that she would soon
make 1t her permanent abode. She 10
keenly interested in the conserva'
forum of the University of Melbourne
and has lectured to its students.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19

Cum b erla and,
Md. September IA.
Pastor Russell
gave tw o dis
courses here to-
day. We report
one of them, from
the text. 81 was
shapen in iniquity;
and In sin did my
mother conceive
me-" psalm 51:5.)
He said:
Diagnosis is val
liable in the at
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
me CHIEF CAUSE
OF CRIMINAL|TY
Born with Criminal Instincts,
Life Is a Hard Battle.

There 10 None Righteous, No, Not One.
Where Lies the BIame7-The Value
Of Correct Disenosis--we Can OPP
pose Sin Best When We Know Its
oriqin-Aids and Disadvantages In
Fighting sin-oivine Help Necessary.
How the NeedfuI Is Provided.
The Hartford republican. (Hartford, Ky.) 18??-1926, 1913-09-19
ARTHUR d. KIRK
Attorney at Law
HARTFORD, Ky.

ASSOCIATED WITH NJ. L. IlEAvRlN
This office IL equipped for hand
ling Commercial Law and Collection
Items as well as other legal and It'll
gated matters. Practice In all the
courts. Prompt and vigorous service.
NJ. l.. Heavrin's Office.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Best Shape for Pans.

When we used the old form of coal
fuel extensively, we also used the old
form of deep iron kettle which set
down in the embers Our modern
fuels of gas. electricity and alcohol
are distributed by a broad. fiat burn
er. and the radiating surface is broad.
not deep. Therefore the old high
style of pot or kettle is very ineffi-
cient on our new stoves or heating
surfaces. Nothing could be worse
than to use a tall coffee pot on a gas
range, If we wish to save gas. The
best shape for the new fuels is the
broad. shallow vessel. as seen best in
the familiar egg poacher For boil
Ing and steaming the pans should be
broad and shallow.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
LITTLE THINGS THAT KILL
Railroads Declare That Many EN-
ployes Lose Lives Through Care
lessness of Others.

1t is the little things that are kill
ing the men who run the engines and
work in the yards and on the trains
companies are also telling their men.
Here are some examples furnished by
the claims department Of one Of the
great railways of the West:
At Cape Girardeau. Mo-. the Frisco
railway has a little turn-table IN
stalled in a round house. Someone
about the roundhouse fixed stick
with a nail in the end of 1t, to be
used in hoisting the night light over
the track running out on the table"
After the happy go-lucky fashion that
obtained there. the man who lit and
hoisted the light always threw down
the stick on the deck of the turn.
table" 1t so happened that a hostler
jumped down from the running board
of an engine one night. lit on the stick
and rolled on over the deck into the
pit beneath, breaking both wrists and
otherwise damaging himself. This
cost the railroad considerable money
and practically disabled the employe
for life. But the cases are legion.
At Garfield. Mo-, an accident oc-
CURED few months ago that resulted
from "over-caution" thoughtlessly ap-
piled. The night operator set his red
light against an oncoming passenger
train for which he had orders To
make doubly sure that the train
stopped. he told his helper to step out
and place a torpedo on the track
The young man did 80. He placed
1t exactly In front of the station plat
form. instead of walking few yards
down the track. A curious youth loung-
ing around on the platform when the
train pulled in was struck by a piece
OF the torpedo when It exploded and
seriously injured The injured young
man, of course. demanded damages.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28

toylike boiler and its four clumsily
built drive wheels. The engineer is
seen standing in plain view of the
observer and the little plaything Of an
engine is hauling a train of passenger
coaches that would not do for freight
cars in the present generation.
With much pomp and display the
poster advertises fast" train from
La Crosse, Wis. to Chicago. The train
was announced to leave the Wiscon-
sin city at 2:15 a. m. and not arrive
here until $50 p. M, where. the poster
says. Trains leave Chicago on all
eastern roads at p. m. and a. m"
The bill was the advertising me
dium employed by the Milwaukee &
Minnesota railroad. The train, which
is depicted with such graphic art, ran
over the lines OF the Milwaukee g.
Minnesota formerly the La Crosse &
Milwaukee) from La Crosse to Mil
waukee. where 1t connected with the
eastern express train Of the Milwau-
kee & Chicago railroad line"
The fact was also exploited in large
black type that after arriving at Chi
cago at $50 p. m. the passenger could
find himself in Buffalo or Pittsburgh
the next afternoon and then-wonders
not ceasing-he could be in New York,
Boston or Philadelphia the next morn
ing after that The announcement IL
dated December 10. 1859.
BY way OF comparison, 1t is a strong
commentary on the progress that rail-
roads, particularly those running out
| xhA DO In
the last half century.
At the time 1t was issued the NIL
waukee & Minnesota railroad had only
couple of hundred miles of crude
track, over which the miniature trains
bumped and ratified In cloud OF black
smoke. Today the line which might
be termed the great grandchild of this
old-time transportation line. reaches
across the continent from Chicago to
the Pacific coast, with a total mileage
Of over $500 miles, and 1t is spend
ing at the rate of $30.000.000 year in
Improving and increasing its trackage.
The development thus-shown Is
typical Of what the great west has
done for the railroad and what the
railroads in turn have done for the
country. Back in 1859 when the Nil
waukee G. Minnesota railroad was the
wonder OF all those who rode upon 1t,
the line had not yet crossed the mis-
sissippi river and passengers desiring
to go to St. Paul we're compelled to
take the packet line up the river from
La Crosse. But the railroads In the
years that have elapsed since that day
have reached out their arms OF steel
across the plains and a vast empire
has sprung into being as II by magic.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
TASTY SCRAP DISHES
HASH BETTER THAN RoASTs
WHEN PREPARED PROPERLY.
May Irwin, the Actress, Tells How
to Cook Meats and the victuals
That Have Been Left Over
From Meals.

That the fastidious should look with
aistrust. if not disgust, upon the hotel
or restaurant made hash or ragout.
,r stew. or minced dish, is quite with
IN my understanding and sympathy.
But it is quite different in the we'll
regulated home.
Ny husband and sons, writes May
irwin. who are rather spoiled as far
as the things of the table are concern
ed, enjoy beef stews and roast beef
hash better than the original roast.
Fricassee chicken. when properly pre-
pared. is much better than roast
chicken. Spaghetti, when warmed
over, is twenty times better than
when first cooked. How seldom we
eat really well cooked dish of
thoroughly cooked
Suppose it is Tuesday-ironing day.
If there is in your pantry or ice box
The skeleton of last nights roast chick
en- you are fortunate. From the
shreds of the meat here and there
sticking to the bones you can make
an excellent fricassee, or that dish
which is favorite in my household.
Mince the bits of cold chicken to-
gether. Chop a small green pepper.
small onion, four mushrooms, bit of
parsley and one cold potato together
until very fine. Have a frying pan
ready with tablespoonful of hot brown
butter and put the mixture in and .ir
1t we'll
Cover it for few moments and let
1t brown on 5Sne side. as hashed brown
potatoess are done. Put on hot plat
..er and garnish with tomato sauce.
This sauce is made by cooking two
or three tomatoes for half an hour;
strain and add a tablespoonful of but
ter, salt, pepper and -four enough to
/ thicken a little
Perhaps you are inclined to toss
away three or four tomatoes that are
soft, but still good. Their ripeness
Is no drawback for the favorite break
fast dish of mine, for which l give
you the recipe.
Cut a slice from the top of each to-
mato. Remove enough of the pulp to
enable you to drop into each tomato
bit of butter the size of your thumb
nail and raw egg. Pin with a tooth
pick strip of raw bacon around each
tomato. Sprinkle little salt and pep
per over the top and put into a very
hot oven until the eggs are set. This
will be in from five to eight minutes.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Rice and Tomato combInation.

One of the ways of cooking rice and
tomatoes together is to boil the rice in
one vessel, cook the stewed tomatoes
In another. seasoning them to taste
with salt. sugar. pepper and onion
Juice, and then to turn the rice, from
which the water has been carefully
drained, into a deep vegetable dish,
pour over 1t the tomatoes, lifting the
rice with fork, that the sauce may
penetrate the rice; set the dish in the
oven for five minutes. and send it to
table smoking hot.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Railroads Run Like an Army.

II Is well known that practically all
Of the railway employees OF Prussia
have served in the army. When they
enter the railway ranks from the army
certain credits are allowed for their
military service, and certain positions
are reserved for army men. This mil
itary experience shows its influence
on their department and discipline In
railway service. There is a noticeable
orderliness and precision about every
thing connected with German rail-
ways.-In respect for authority and
strict observance of the rules the Ger
man railway employe has no superior.
The traveller will not fail to notice
the red-capped station master stand
ing at attention on the station plat
form as the train passes through each
station. He will also find the senior
signalman. gateman and other en-
pioyes connected with train service al
ways In evidence, standing like SEN
tries as the train passes. The operat-
ing official. while riding over the lie.
can thus take q census of all employees
In positions OF responsibility. When
he alights at station his rank Is at
once recognized. The station master
Immediately salutes and gives verbal
report OF the situation at his station.
II the official goes into signal tower
the signalman In charge saluteB and
reports. II he goes into an engine
house the foreman salutes and gives
a brief report OF the work In progress.
Railway Age Gazette.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
To Remove Ink Stains.

Kerosene will remove ink stains
from furniture. A few drops of am.
monia in bottle of ink will prevent
the ink fading. Put a tablespoonful OF
borax in the last rinsing water when
washing. The clothes will be whittier
for It; and linen dresses. II put
through first. will need no starch and
will look nicer. Add little borax to
starch. hot or cold. and the starch
things will be sitter.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Complainant Cheat.

Boggle lawyer)-Mr. Fitur.. here
Is a check for $3.50. i hose charged
you $3.50 for my services. l hope you
viii not think 1t unreasonable"
Fitum-Well. Mr.. Boggle. you have
collected only $500. 1t is true. but
then you have had 20 much trouble
with all those complaints and nfiidav-
Its and things that think you de.
serve most of it."-Puck
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Walnut Cake.

One cup of sugar. one-half cup but
ter, creamed together. Add two eggs
two-thirds milk. two cups flour. into
which has been sifted two teaspoon
baking powder, one cup raisins, one
cup chopped walnuts. This Is nice
with chocolate frosting. thickly cover
ed with walnut meats.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Goldfish Supreme.

Soak shredded Goldfish over night
In the morning add it to a thin cream
sauce. Now prepare slices of toast
cut them in oblong pieces. about two
by three inches. Place on each halt
a hardboiled egg-cut in two length
wise-pour a liberal amount of the
creamed Goldfish over this. Garnish
with a radish rose and serve.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28

a few days ago
which reveals the
crudeness of rail
roading in the
days before the
Civil war. says the
Chicago HerllG.
T h Q a d v e rtfse-
ment shows a pic
ture of the queer.
old-style engine
with its towering
smokestack, its
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Man. Of Al.sk..

Since 1898 the United States geolog-
ical survey has made topographic
maps in Alaska of 121.252 square miles
on scale Of four miles to an inch and
2,732 square miles on a scale OF one
mile to an inch. and has made geo.
logic reconnaissance maps Of 99.350
square miles, with detailed geologic
maps Of 2,304. Total area. 5se.400
square miles.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28

The average woman insists on hav.
Ing her own way In everything. but
she changes her mind so often that
1t breaks the monotonv
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Rice Gems.

One cup cold boiled rice. one egg
one cup milk, one saltspoon salt. one
cup flour. Bake in iron gem pans thai
have been well buttered.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Damp Cloth.

Put damp cloth or damp napkin
necessary to wait before serving.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
Help to Farmers.

A western railroad lends stump pull
lers to farmers at nominal rental
rs one way Of encouraging business.
United labor bulletin., 1913-06-28
TIMES CHANGES SHOW
OLD RAILROAD POSTER APPEARS
HUMOROUS TODAY.
What Was Considered Fast Travelling
In 1859 Would Hardly Suit the
Modern Generation, Accustomed
to More Hustle"

A quaint railroad poster bearing the
date of 1859 came to light in Chicago