davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
WHATS THE USE, ANYHOW!

lust on the heels of the Chicago conference
which has been trying to figure out plan for re.
organizing and undermining the Republican party
comes performance in the New Jersey Legislature
which seems to give the complete answer.
The Chicago conferees want to make the coun-
ny believe that the Republican party is progressive
enough that it has the light; that it has been
chastised and, il restored to confidence and the sal
ary list, would do the things the nation wants and is
going to have done.
A few hours after the adjournment of that con-
ference the New Jersey senate votes the jury
form bill, measure concerning which, in good con-
science and morals there can be no two opinions.
The bill ought to become law.
Yet the solid Republican vote of the Jersey SEN
ate was polled against the bill, and it was killed
The solid Democratic vote favored it. There were
eleven Republicans and ten Democrats voting
The Jersey senate accurately represents the old
leadership of the Republican party. What's the use
trying to make progressive party out of party
completely in control of such elements? The Jersey
instance indicates clearly that the real bosses Of the
Republican party are, unreconstructed. They are
prepared to do in Trenton, this year. the things
sbey did in Chicago last year. They are doing them.
These leaders do not represent the sentiment of
the whole party, by any means; but they control it.
There is only one way to make a liberal party in
opposition to the Democracy, and that is by ANAL
eamafion of the liberal masses of the Republican
and Progressive organizations, under a leadership
nat will represent their real opinions.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
The NJ an on the Road
Sy IL 7. EattIn.

was for lively music. I used to hire
room next to the parlor: and after sup
per would get a bunch of the boys to-
gether: or else get one Of the colored
bellhops to play for the boys. We would
drift in and listen to the music after a
fine dinner.
Then when he was in good trim We
would retire to the next room to look
over my line The boys would shout
and sing. And the poor buyer with the
elegant feed under his vest and the
shouting going on in the next room
could hardly keep still. His mind would
not be on my samples at all. In order
tn cut matters short he would take my
suggestions about the assortments and
quantities. And you can just bet the
bank roll about my being a neat little
suggester.'
.Did he ever tumble to your game?"
ked big Bill Sawyer.
when a person Is nuts over music
business IL never. allowed to interfere
with pleasure replied the veteran
salesman.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
AusEFUL AND SANE ORGANIZATION.

The annual meeting of the United States Civil
Service Retirement Association will be held tomor-
row evening at the g. A. R. Hall, in Pennsylvania
avenue between Fourteenth and Fifteenth streets
For fourteen years this organization has worked for
= practicable solution of the problems of the civil
service, and it has accomplished substantial results
IN the education Of the public and public men to
better understanding of this difficult situation.
The association stands vigorously for a con,
szibutory plan Of pensions and retirement Con-
ributory" means that the bene6ciaries are them
selves to give something toward it; and that sug-
xesdon is anattema to a great many civil service
people who have not studied the subject or who re-
3use to realize the benefits that would vastly out
vsish their contributions. Yet despite the preju-
10 aroused by honestly fayoring the contributory
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
GOOD STORIES
Imaginary Insomnia.

~ RAND wHITLOCK, who 1, v.ss.
X ing stories and books when n. 4,
- not mayortng and reforming.
hates with all the vindictfveness
tnat Ii In his heart, clocks that strike
the hour and throw out on the silvery
ar Of night their bell-like chimes.
One evening he went to Columbus and
put up at a hotel near church tower.
which was some tower when it camc to
Ginning. Brand got into bed, and after
tossing restlessly about for a long time,
heard the big clock strike zone, After
what seemed an interminable hour, dur
ing which his brain was teemins with
ideas for uplifting the human race ana
taking money away from publishers, the
bell rang twice.
NV 1.-Two O'clock" .sroaned whitlock.
IN never get to Sleep"
Three o'clock struck
mad" -" e0H'
He sprang out of bed. turned on thu
hsnt ana looked at his watch
IL was quarter to 1 o'clock in the
mernlng and his agile brain had changed
{se quarter-chimes into hour bells
Popular Magazine.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
What's on tie Program IN
Washinoton 7oday

The following Masonic organizations
Will meet tonight: Lodges-Grand
Lodge. second stated communication:
81 Johns Mite Association. Royal
Arch Chapters-School of Instruction
Eastern Star Chapters-Naomi. No. Q;
Brookland, No II.
Tne following j. o. o. F. organizations
Will meet tonight: Lodges-Eastern.
NO. 4; Harmony. No. 8; and Federal
CITY. No. 20. degree: Friendship. No
business. Encampment-Colum-
oian, No. l. degree.
The following National Union councils
viii meet tonight: Postoffice. and In
terror.
The following X. Of p. organizations
VIII meet tonight: Lodges-Mt Yer
non. No. 8: Hermione. No. Il; Union
No. p: Columbia. No. 2S Military
Department - Washington Company.
No. l. business.
The following Red Mems organization.
Will meet tonight: Saltese Tribe. No.
lS' White Eagle Council. No. 1
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Even the Convicts Laughed.

y ERE is a story the Kansas City
Journal says is being told on
Governor Hodges:
THE first time i saw the gov
ernor he was only State senator. He
was called to Leavenworth to inspect
the penitentiary. and l had to go down
10 write 1t up-met the governor for
the first time. The warden. by way of
giving a special treat to the prisoners.
had collected 100 or 500 of them in the
assembly hall, and in an off-hand way
requested the senator to address them.
Mr.. Hodges wasn't as proficient In poll
tics as he Is now. He was plainly some
what embarrassed and hesitated q
minute.
MY fellow-citizens-' he began.
That didn't sound right. and he COM
menced again.
my fellow-convicts-
by that time the prisoners were
smiling. Mr.. Hodges dropped his formal
manner and smiled. too.
"'Well. l don't know exactly how to
address you, boys he amended. but
I'm mighty glad to see SO many of you
here"
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
THE THREATENED ICE FAMINE

The ice cream industry, Of course, like every.
thing else under the from suffrage to sugar, mas
ib organ and through this official journal we learn
that there really is an ice shortage that menaces
this section with famine in the near future.
STILL we must refuse to believe the worst until
II arrives The new management of the weather
has demonstrated such versatility and executive ca
paciy at il is impossible to feel pessimistic True,
Willis Moore allowed hcle winter to get by with
out producing real se1e. But his successors
have shown themselves able, n one fortnight. to
put on the hottest May weel nd the coldest May
week in meteorological hisie Z; so why not an
ticipate that il tie ice supply runs low, they will
give rs supplemental ic harvest, say. about
July 4?
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

plan this organization has gained in authority, in
fluence, and standing with the committees and men,
bers of Congress- 1t has owed and still owes heavily
for the zeal and intelligence with which DR.. Level
lyn Jordan, its secretary, has pressed the cause.
Tonght's meeting is to be an important one, and
large attendance is urged. Matters concerning the
prosecution of the civil service workers campaign
under the new Administration will demand attention
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Son. hon lowest consistency thou cherishe thine
I perae whatsoever thy propocaion charge thee beware
of crying MEYER AGAIN."
Behold saith the prophet che weepeh oudes his ws
funeral shall soonest choose her SUCCESSOR!'
But unto thee he that cysth "Nepe again. most pehem
emily the divorce the first sink back into the shafts
Of matrmony.
YEA though upon heaven nothing
save him.
For this Sdns private signal; and that whenso
orsweareth thing whether be tobacco folly
maimony there is siper laughter throughout Ge
henna.
For it hath become his pet TEMPTATION.
Verify verify the Nepe agan Easy Marks in the Garden
of Matrimony
But "Neper of a
boy colder than yesterdays kiss and less ipressonable than board
ing house steak
For they know not what they miss!
Lo Neper again. prize among husbands For having
dpeH Pugator with the WRONG he anketh Heaven for
the privilege of loving the RIGHT woman.
Likewise the little Ways of not strange unto him.
When she weepeh naugh he PRETENDETH comprehend
and when she smie naug he consumed with jealousy
He regardeh her neither angel devil, but as
HUMAN BEING Which is exceeding comforting
He readeh her illusions and apodeth her "nerpes
And when he preparcateh he eh drcay hd for he hath
had much practice.
Moreover the HABIT of Marmony upon him. And Without
the morning and the lecture he would lonely and be
greatly bored.
fncy concerning his breakfast particular
cernng his socks and his buon and all that he hath made his first
wife suffer shall be doned for unto the second.
YEA pair of old shoes whch been BROKEN N he
is exceeding SOOTHING
Verify verify secondhand dbominaon and second
hand furniture secondhand husband BARGAIN
SeLah
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Estimated surplus. 9lSoOOO
Here was given the basis to which all finance
legislation during the year must be adjusted; so
much income from this tax, so mucn from that; So
much miscellaneous income. Against these receipts
such and such expenditure for the army, such and
such for the navy. Increase one appropriation and
another must be docked. "The government has thus
much to spend and is agreed that it shall be appor-
toned thus and thus to the various departments
Gentlemen, what is your pleasure?"
This means fairly well-ordered house; one to
which our own makes an uncomforting contrast
Each department struggling for all it can get ire
spective of the needs of any other, and utterly re-
gardless of the countys problematcal total receipts
Appropriation bills for army, navy, sundry civil ex-
penses, postoffice internal improvements, each its
own MASTER and Congress never knowing until all
have been passed and on top of them all the pork
barrel, what its fiscal nickname is to be! How lucky
it is that Uncle Sam is rich
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Amusements.

National-"Follies," 2:l5 and Sis .. m.
Columbia-"The Prince Chap" sis = m
Polfs-"The Greyhound" a:I5 and sis
p. m.
Relasco-Antarctic lecture. $50 and a.ao
p m.
Academy-"The Convict's Daughter
Sis p. m.
ase's-Talking pictures. to II D. m.
Cosmos-Vaudevilie
Gayety-Harry Hastings Show. 2:ls and
o:lS .. N.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

''Mr. Penrose,'' says the Post"
mentioned a speech Of the Senator
from North Carolina. In which he held
the wrapt attention of the Senate three
years ago for four days" And did he
talk wrapidly7
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Not Exactly an Ovation.

n one occasion in his career Nat
Goodwin was humping over the
galosene circuit as the star In
a play which was so bad that
the only good thing in 1t was the last
curtain. Naturally the public evinced
no desire to patronize 1t. Finally. how
ever. the brave actors and actresses
played In a town which. for some mys-
FERROUS reason, turned out a good crowd
to see the dismal performance.
IL was too good to be true. After
the final act Goodwin sought out the
stage manager and said:
ION the level. are those real people
out there?
Certainly. a whole lot Of them." re-
piled the manager.
..yyeU that's one on me-" replied
Goodwin. 'I thc"~ht that crowd was
a painted drop curtain. Popular Maga-
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
LIVING ON AN INCOME.

The time coming round for England to set fer
house in order for the ensuing year. the chancellor
of the exchequer went before parliament about two
weeks ago and delivered himself in his annual
budget speech of this summary of the governments
financial prospects:
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Real Grief.

"Ah. little boy. I'm glad didn't laugh when that
poor man slipped a banana and fell down."
boo hoo-hoo. II fatherr'
Was It? Well WELL cheer sonnie He's not badly
hurt"
mo. but-but-it my stepped on. an
there's hardly any ee H lsft!'-Exchango.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

seventy-four years ago today we are
miles from the end-the first express
company. through a legal technicality.
caused a three-year postpone:nent of
the suit brought to recover Cor a pack
age lost in transit.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Why paragraphers wind up in asyl-
ums: well, l guess your works a
whole lot easier now that the baseball
seasons opened
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
THE HAPPY DAYS.

Alas! for the trouble and bother
OF tUooing young su1ra0ette!
One once got the "yes" Of her father,
But noto has the mothers to get.
s. G. r.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
W'fA .so~0,mes a katls srtAe osA<-

The vocational bureau seems an a.
sured thing. but We do not anticipats
having to patronize 1t in order to find
out whether or not We are in the right
line Of work. Accommodating column
readers give US daily-well. bulletins.
We almost said assurances.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Another thing we want to know Is
when, II at all, the Hon. William Jen-
nings Bryan gets a chance to work.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Mother Little Job For the Under
Congress!

FOL DE ROL: "A bill to permit all
persons carrying three or more suit
cases. and arriving at train gates within
80 seconds Of the leaving time, to pass
through without putting everything
down and hauling out their transporta-
ton"
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Why Is q Proof Reader7
fFrom the "HeraId. "l

From the ''HeraId.'D
Bryan said he had learned patience
In his long public career and rejoiced
that he could not sign the last official
papers putting into effect the popular
election Of United States Senator's.
which he had advocated nineteen gears
aRo-
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Why theater managers should read
proof: The advertisements that = cur
rent attraction saw 800 nights In New
York" A misprint. palpably, for So
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Our narrow-minded notion of nothing
on which to pay cable rates is the edi-
torial comment OF the London papers on
American affairs.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

anpdssduoT OF commerce in
flush times" began the re-
tired salesman. Every one has a hand
out for tips or for your merchandise.
Nor Is there anything nearer the we'll
paved place Of punishment when things
are slack.
Still. there are ways. Of getting busi-
ness In duh seasons. And half of the
fun Of the game on the road comes
from these tricks Of human nature that
only a seasoned man learns.
There used to be a buyer. up State.
who was pie for me when had to have
business from him. While things were
good and other houses were buyiny
freely / would never crowd him. But
when was desperately in need of bust
ness used to lay the scene for our
neat little act This buyers weakness
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
Bright Expectations.

n CHARMING young ~ofhdn "dIk-
~ ed into the stationer's shop In
~ a village and asked to see
some typewriting paper. After
making her selection she hesitated for
a moment. DO you make any reduction
to clergymen?'' she inquired.
Yes" replied the stationer promptly.
Are you a clergyman's wtfeE
Moo she answered.
a cIeryyman's daughter. probably"
said the man as he tied I'D the package.
NO" was the young womans hesita.
ting answer. "But"-and she leaned
over the counter and spoke In a conf
Dental whisper-..if nothing happens l
dent as soon as he comes home from
college next term."-Everybody's Masa-
zine.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

The Nationals are constantly between
the revel and the deep grief.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
You've Our Permish.

g. s. X: l have a dandy idea about
now 10 use one Of those stamping ma
chimes. I'd like to throw it at the man
who invented them.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

There's many slip 'twixt the plan
and the ship.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Life to Chamber of Commerce Is
Just one darned approval after another.
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

Interest" says the Star" will CEN
ire on the meeting of the executive COM
mittee Of the Republican national COM
mittee''
The Washington times., 1913-05-14
THE MUSIC-HYPNOTIST.

.To my mind there is no finer job
- In the world than that as an
ambassador Of commerce in
The Washington times., 1913-05-14

You know our position.
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07
COTTON RECEIPTS
WILL INCREASE HERE
CIssine Down Vi Compress at Camden
Results in Gotten 3eina Brought
to This City ~ be Pressed.

As a result OF the closing down OF
the plant OF the Camden Compress
Company at Camden. much cotton
that has heretofore been congresses
in Ouaehita county is being brought
to Pine Bluff aud pressed. A large
majority OF these bales are being
compressed at the plant of the Pine
Bluff Compress and Warehouse Conn
pany in the eastern part of the city.
IL Is stated that cotton from every
station soub of Pine Bluff as far as
Garland ely, Ark, the station just
north OF Texarkana. will be brought
to the LEGAL compress this season. No
reason is given for the closing down
of the plant at Camden. In all, it is
estimated that from 3e,goo to 10000
more bales of cotton will be received
here than in former cotton seasons.
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07
RAINFALL ADDS To
FLOODS In FEytS

Houston, Tex Oct. 4-Rain fell
again during the night throughout the
Texas coast section. checking the fan
of many streams and continuing The
period OF the flooded district. In the
southeast portion of Texas conditions
are still improving, in spite OF the
additional rain. but conditions again
are serious in the southwestern sec
ton. The lower reaches of the Trim
Try. Brazos, Colorado, Guadalupe and
other rivers are at flood stages, and
many thousand acres of farm lands
are inundated. Seventy-five persons
are marooned on a mound near Con
zales. Ii is expected they will be res
cued today
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07

for what timber there was ON it.
smith had hauled load of wood to
Eureka Springs ON The day of the kill
ing and upon returning home late in
the afternoon found Hernden cutting
pine tree on The disputed strip OF
ground, He went to where Herndun
was cutting on the tree and told him
II he cut the tree down he would kill
him, to which Herndon replied:
Il guess yeu will have to do it..
and continued to cut on the tree.
A few second later the tree fell,
whereupon Smith. it is charged. shot
Herndon with shotgun, killing him
instantly.
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07
Interstate Commerce Com
mission Suspends bhe
Schedule Order.
HU|RTFUL TO PUBLIC
Taken OFF Pending Hearing of the
Ease BY the Commits
sion.

\ ruling by the Interstate Com
nerce Commission, rendered at a
general session held at its offices ii
Washington. d. G.. on Saturday, De-
tober /, affecting the proposed id
augliration or Il new schedule and
increased rate on cotton and cotton
linters, by the ST. Louis Southwestern
Railway Company, touching on after
state shipments ia routing cotton TO
port and other points, was rendered
notice of which ruling has been filed
with the chamber of Commerce in
this city, and is as follows:
It appearing that there has been
filed with the Interstate Commerce
Commission by the st Louis South
western Railway Company, = tariff
containing schedules stating new
individual and joint regulations and
practices affecting rates and charges
TO become effective on October s.
1918, designated as follows.
st. Fouis Southwestern Railway
Company, L. G. G. No. Sgt,
IL is ordered thar the Commission
upon complaint, without formai
pleading, enter upon hearing con-
corning the propriety of the advance
and the lawfulness OF the rate,
charges, regulations and practices
IN the schedule contained in said
tariff on page thereof. in item No.
t.
It further appearing that said
schedules make certain advances in
rates tor the Interstate transpofta-
tioa OF cotton aud cotton lihters. aud
the rights and interests of the public
appearing TO he injuriously affected
thereby. and it being the opinion of
the Commission that the effective
date of the schedule above specified
be postponed pending said hearing
and decision thereon,
1t is further ordered that the
operation OF the schedules above
specified. contained in said tariff. be
suspended, and that the use OF the
regulations and practices Their IN
stated be deferred upon interstate
traffic until February ). 1914. unless
otherwise ordered by the Commission.
And it is further ordered that a
copy of this order be filed with said
schedule in the office of the Inter-
state Commerce Commission. and that
copies thereof be forthwith served
upon the ST. Loui5 Southwestern
Ese'isvsg Gompaay and the Pine Bluff
and arkansas River Railwas Gem
paHy, and thst said carriers be aad
they Ere hereby made respondents to-
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07
ARRESTED FOR A
3-YEAR- OLD CRIME
IL il Charged That He killed. Weigh
bor. u. u. Hernden, in u Quarrel
Over Cutting Down Tree.

BerryvSlle. Oct IA. Coffee dep
of this county. and r. r. Gordon. con-
stable of Cedar Township, in which
the city of Eureka Springs is located.
yesterday captured AL Smith who is
charged with shooting and instantly
killing O. n Herndon six miles south
of Eureka Springs about three years
ago. The capture was made at Coin
City. Iowa, where Smith had lived for
about year, having fled TO that point
from Salem. Neb.. where he had lived
one year previous to his removal 10
9in City. The same officers who ef-
tied his arrested located him at
lem. Neb.. in August, 1912 and
a1ade a trip from Eureka Springs TO
Essat point to arrest and bring him
mex here for trial, only to find upon
aeaehins Salem that the object of
heir visit had fled.
Unwilling to return to Arkansas
empty handed the officers secured
the country for several miles around
Salem with the hope of getting trace
of the fugitive After week or ten
days spent in this effort they returned
to Eureka Springs alone. They. how
ever, never relaxed their efforts, and
about month ago new clue was
picked up, followed and the arrest
was the result. Smith is tired Of flee
ing from the officers and IS return
ing to Arkansas without the formal
Ity * > reo0isitiou from the governor.
II was abouf three years ago that
Al sm II and O. y. Herndon had q
dispute over the iine Between two for
y sere tracts of land, valuable only
Pine Bluff daily graphic. (Pine Bluff, Ark.) 1893-1942, 1913-10-07

cure on q aew principle. Put il on any
corn in TWO seconds: IT stops pain, the
corn begins to ShriveI and disappears
It never fails. Simplest thing YOU
ever saw. No fussy bandages no
greasy salves to turn healthy flesh
"peely and raw, no plasters that
make corns bulge out Your corns
won't pull and hurt way up to your
heart Lay aside your knife and razor.
No more digging and tugging and
wineiag, no more bleeding no more
danger of blood poison. "GETS-IT"
never hurts healthy fesh; it is safe,
painless quick. SIMPLE sure For
warts, eaiiuses and bunions, too
GETs-fT" IS sold at all druggists
at % cents bottle, or sent on receipt
of price by E. Lawrence & Co, Chicago.