davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

your own he cannot do this for you,
because you are the master of youT
ballots and it cannot be tempered
with
The bond issue is no longer In
any danger. The First Bank and
Trust Company has pledged to take
care Of il and If Mr. Parsons did not
have some Interior motive in oppos.
ing the proposition the banks letter
to the public, printed in yesterday 5
issue of The Bulletin would have
caused him to enlist his efforts in
favor of the movement.
Mr.. Parsons never has and never
will sincerely favor the adoption in
Cairo of the Commission Form OF
Government. He has tried to make
us believe his opposition to tbs
movement was aetuated by fear thai
the selling of the bonds might be in
terfered with. This question ha:
been eliminated and that he is still
fighting the proposition. no longeI
leaves the people in doubt as tc
where he stands.
Go to the polls early today ans
vote YES. Fold your ballot am
see that it goes into the ballot DO,
without being tempered with
VOTE YES AND SAVE CAIRO.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
OPENS UP k0STRIls, CLEARS HEAD,
ENDS COLOS OR eAIARRH At OhCE

grant balm dissolves by the heat al
the nostgils; penetrates and heals
the inHamed, swollen membrane
which Ines the nose. head and
throat; clears the air passages;
stops nasty discharges and feeling
Of cleansing. soothing relief comes
Immediately.
Don't lay awake tonight strag-
Cling for breath. with head stuffed
nostrils closed, hawking and blow
ing. Catarrh or a cold. with It's
running nose. foul mucous dropping
into the throat, and raw dryness i:
distressing but truly needless.
Put your faith--just once--ir
"Ely's Cream Balm" and your colo
ors catarrh will surely disappear
Advt.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
MRS. LARAMORE
TELLS TROUBLES
Lady in Goodwater Describes Her
Distressing Experience and
Tells How She Was
Finally Relieved.

Goodwatef, Mo.-"Ever since. was
q little GIRL" says Mrs. Riley Laramore,
81 was great sufferer from dyspepsia.
suffered misery after eating, and had
terrible heartburn.
thought | had TO suffer this way as
long as lived, but when began 10 take
Thedford's Black-Draught, in small
doses, every night, the heartburn was all
zone in a few days, and ! could eat
without distress.
ltook two small packages in all. and
although that was some time ago, the
dyspepsia has not returned.
speak good word for Thedford's
Black Draught whenever have the OPP
portunity."
Ifeating causes distress, we urge you
20 try Thedford's Black-Draught. Il
cleanscs the system, helps the stomach to
digestits food, regulates the bowels. and
stimulates the liver.
Nacts gently and is without bad aiteg.
effects Vsxjk Price 25c.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04


Our illustrious mayor, who is paid
to see that the taxpayers receive a
square deal regardless of how his
personal interests may be affected,
no longer seeks to keep under cover
in the Commission Form movement
The mayor has declared In public
on several occasions that he favors
the Commission Form Of Municipal
Government. He may favor 1t. but
not for Cairo II he desired this
plan OF government in Cairo he
would be AZ the head of the move.
ncnt today, instead of the prime
leader of the opposition.
While the taxpayers were observ.
iug last Sabbath, Mr.. Parsons was
exerting every possible physical eff
fort in his work against the move.
ment. Il is positively known that
he spent much of his time in print
ing Offices, where the literature
which you received yesterday. was
being prepared While he was not
q the printing Office. it Is positive
W known that he was devoting much
~ ms time TO the exhibition of .
1ctter from the firm Of Wood ana
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
P.n.o.o.o-o.re George


Ten reasons why the Commission
Form of Municipal Government
should be defeated.
First--It will turn the moon ID
green cheese.
Second The levees will fall In
Third--The rivers will stop flow
ing.
Fourth Anguish Leek will lost
his job.
Fifth--City employees will be ex-
pected to earn their salaries.
siAth-The price Of beer will adj
vance.
Seven The blacks will turn
white and the whites black.
Eight-The city hall will be
moved
Nine Streets will be cleaned al
least once a month,
Ten George don't want it TO be
adopted.
There are thousands of Other
dreadful things we might call to
your attention, but time and space
compells us to place the limit at ter
warnings. II you would avoid these
ten and all the other disasters, take
a dose of Parsons Persitifiage before
going to the polls today. These lit
tie pink pills, which are guaran
tecd by the renowned law firm o.
Hilbert aud Hilbert, will cure any
thing from chilblains and bunions t.
81 Yitus dance and the turkey trot
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
COMEDY.

where's the author?" asked the
excited manager,
HE was here moment ago. re-
piled the leading lady. why do you
want him? The audience isn't calling
for him"
That's why ] want him. This
comedy is in danger of being sick.
ening failure. All his clever lines are
going over the heads Of the people out
in front. There hasn't been solitary
laugh SO far Unless he consents to
scatter in few swear words we may
as well quit right where we are
We've got to give the public comedy
that 1t understands"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
EavorIte Flotion.

"Smokeless Coal"
Police Protection"
Il Wasn't Going More Than Six
Miles an Hour, Your Honor"
90 Beg Your Pardon; | Didn't Mean
20 Interrupt You"
IF You Can Do Anything for Mr..
Jones | shall Regard 1t as a Personal
Favor"
"Why, Do You Owe Me S., Old
Chap? / Had Forgotten All About It.
"Ill Be Down in Minute, John"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Numbering Strauss.

Excuse me" said the detective, as
be presented himself at the door Of
he music academy, but hope you'll
give me what information YOU have,
md not make any fuss
What do you mean?' was the indis-
nant inquiry.
why, that little affair, you know"
u don't understand
why, you see, We got tip from
he house next door that somebody
'ere vas numbering Richard Strauss,
nd the chief sent me down to work
n the case. "--Tit-Bits.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Concerning a "Profit."

Citrate Engaged on theological
discussion with his landlady1 -"And
what do you think of the character Of
ST. Paul."
Landiady-"Ah, he was good soul!
DO you remember how he once said
we should eat what Is set before us
and ask, no questions for conscience
sake? I've often thought how would
have liked i'm for a lodger.'--The
Sketch.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
A POOR EXCUSE.
81 don't suppose he'll ever ANON

81 don't suppose he'll ever sM5ns
to much"
why not?"
He's afraid to take a chance"
In what way?"
81 offered him a block OF mining
stock at 121a that is likely to go to
par at any time, but he said he
couldn't see it,"
Wouldn't touch it eh. ?"
mo He said that buying mining
stock is the poorest excuse for being
broke that he knows Of
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Domestic scene.

tits money for this and money for
that, all day long!" snarled Mr. Blob
ster to his wife Woman, is there
anything you can do without"
Yes answered Mrs. Blobster, in
her sweetest tones
Name it! Name it,"
THE smallpox" replied Mrs. Blob
ster, and when Mr. Blobster went out
he slammed the door so hard 1t rat
tied the unwashed dishes in the
kitchen sink.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Mystery Solved.

Standing before several large pic
lures of his Industrious ancestors, lit
tie Robert listened silently while his
mother described each one and point
ed with pride at the large collars and
gorgeous velvet suits.
The boy finally turned to his mother
and exclaimed:
Nov I know what Jimmie Burns
meant when he said We had let of
ruff necks in our family"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

man.
My pas millionaire philanthro-
pist"
Well well! That's nothing to cry
about. is it,"
IT amt, amt it. He's just prom
ised to give me SIS to spend for my
birthday provided / raise a similar
amount"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Arranalna the Program.

Organist discussing the music for
special servicel And after that
chant I'll put in something lighter,
something to relieve the heavy classic
style Of tho tie Deum,
Bilkins ION the committee)-A
anything to relieve the tedium will be
appreciated-Ta
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Instantly Relieves Swollen, ITaamed
Nose, Head. Throat--o, Breathe
Freely-Dull Headache Goes
Nasty Discharge Ste
ny "Ely's Cream Balm. .

Try lily cream bainl-
Get a small bottle anyway. Just to
try it--Apply little in the postrils
and instantly your cl0ged nose and
stopped-up air passages Of the head
will open; you will breathe freely;
dullness and headache disappear.
BY morning the catarrh, cold-in-
mead or catarrhal sore throat will be
gone.
End such misery now Get the
small bottle OF "Ely's Cream Balm
at any drug store. This sweet, fra
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

The Bulletin is authorized to an
nonnce the candidacy of William II
Wood for election as road commits
sioner in Road District No. 7, sub
jeet t. the approval of the voters at
the election of March 4.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Willing to Be Shocked,

Il telf you. Ringgold, it's shocking
and disgusting to hear the language
used in smoking cart"
Il didn't know you could hear ordi.
nary conversation. Squinehley."
Il can't; | use my ear trumpet"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Good Resolutions.

"The Wilhamses certainly have
made queer New Years resolutions"
What are they?"
well, she resolved not to smoke
any more cigarettes, drink any more
highballs or take any trips to womans
rights conventions"
And he"
He resolved TO make her allowance
so small that she would be compelled
to keep her resoluii6nl judge
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

We are authorized to announce
the candidacy Of A. j. Ross. fo'
election as Police Magistrate, Sub.
ject to the approval of the voters al
the regular city election to be held
Tuesday, april Is. 1913.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Not . Honeful Outlook

well, you have one consolation,
even il it is costing you lot to have
your son educated. In a little while
he will be able to get along without
your help"
No, that's what's worrying me. You
see, he's going to be preacher"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

We are authorized to announce
the candidacy OF Frank B. Arm
strong for elsction as City Treasur-
er, subject to the approval of the
voters at the regular city election to
be held Tuesday. April Is, 1913.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

We are not lazy.
But we'd not tote
A belt on the back
or an overcoat.
To a Hioher Court.
or him

Mother, can | go to the picture
show with Jack Wilson tonight? He's
got two tickets"
You know / don't like You to 90
he picture show, Fred; you'll have
, ask your father when he comes
home"
But suppose be says | can't go
then what ?''--Harper's Bazaar
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
ANNOUNCEMENT.

va are authorized to announce
lie cana5dacy Of Pat Mahoney as In
dependents candidate for City Treas
usxf. sabiecet 10 the approval OF the
votsws at the regular city election o.
April is. 1919. 2-11-td
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Such WastefulneasI

Persistent Person--Would you help
us to send missionary to Korea? 1t
will cost only $4,000,
Old Crouch (brutally)-Two thou.
sand dollars! Why you can get him
croaked by gunman here in New
York for s10!--Puck.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Tenacious Tradition.

"The early Romans were as great
In war as the modern Italians are in
music"
Perhaps" said the impresario,
that accounts for the fact thG. YOU
can't hope to have grand opera and
peace in the same theater."
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

We are authorized to announce
the candidacy of Charles Meshew
for election as Police Magistrate,
subject to the approval of the yot-
ers at the regular city election t.
be held Tuesday, April Is, 1913.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
PLEASING to Papa.

Wife TO her husband as she goes
out)--"Now, look after the children
Don't let them play with matches y
make any noise" Ito the 5ilsrenl
And you--watch papa n9nH ef VI
90 to the saloon!"--Fliseapae slaeg,
(Munich)
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

and tine cultivation of more r.o.is-
able erCps under the local climate
conditions L. A. Markham, asri-
cultural commissioner, with head
quarters at Little Rock, Ark, is d.
recting the work.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

We are authorized to announce
the candidacy of Frank E. Davis as
candidate for election as mayor Of
the City OF Cairo, Illinois, subject
to the approval Of the electors at
the election OF April is, 1913.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Short Buns. but Certain.

why do the managers persist in
accepting the plays of the poet Blint
hinski when they are always fail
ures?r
WE'LL they always cause such a
rumpus that the house is entirely sold
out for two weeks anyway.-Fliegende
Blaetter (Munich).
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
RAILWAY RUNBLES
Breezy Gossip Concerning Railroads
and Employees of Vast
Interest.

The gra moyeu ',pon the
Cairo market as orted by the
Grain Inspection Bureau, was as
fellows yesterday; { cars wheat, )
OF ccTn and p of oats received, and
cars corn and 81 of oats shipped.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Evasion.

MY good man, won't you make up
your mind to give up this passion for
horse racing?"
"All right. ma'am. I'll try and lead
bettor life"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
At looaerhesds.

do youa think you can convince the
jury that / am orazy?'
Il can if YOU pay me in advance"
Il would be crazy If I did that"
and Id be crazy not to make you
do it,"
"Why so?"
I'm going to prove you to be crazy
and one cannot collect bill from a
crazy man"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

Mrs Henpecque-I see by this pa.
Ter that a man was arrested on his
Wedding day and sent to the peniten
larry for life. Wasn't that awful?
Mr. Henpecque-Yes; awful lucky
or him.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

The Iron Mountain has inau gurat-
I'd new schedule out of Poplar
BLUM in the passenger service
Travellers can now leave any point
on the Knobel branch in the morn
ing nd arrive in Cairo the same ey-
aning about o'clock.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

when the attention of The Bull
letin is called to any misstatement
of fact or to any error concerning
any man or thing, corrections WI
cheerfully be made.)
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
A Spoiled Season.

Who is the man that looks so sad,
And every hour gets GUNNER.
As though all hope had left him now?''
Poor fellow! That's the plumber
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

You'd better marry Mr.. Ezymut
counseled the fond papa.
DO you think he truly loves me?'
asked the pretty daughter.
I'm sure he does"
How can you be sure when an
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
Easy.

We love to do our work at home,
Our bits of prose. our aquibs of rhyme
It always is so quiet, for
No more than three talk at a time.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

not?"
i've been borrowing money from
him for three months, and be keeps
coming"
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
We Wonder.

She wore a very stylish hat,
Her form was rather trim;
We wonder IL IL was her hat
That most appealed to him.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

Commercial Agent Mussman is in
inc matt looking after affairs for
the Big Four, He is expected TO re-
turn today.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

"They made college professor
president Now they are talking of
making the president college profess
sor."
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

Rclp SeigIeman, Cotton as he
S Familiarity known by the boys, who
las held down the desk of chief rate
clerk in the NJ. and o. local office for
2 number OF years, has taken posi-
ion rendered him by the Halliday
Milling Company in a similar capac-
". Seigleman was practically
brought up" in the NJ. and 0. office.
lie is one Of the best rate men in
he city and his selection by the Hal
'iday Milling Company is a recog-
1itie1 of his ability. w. O. Adams.
Who has been night rate man, has
mecceded Seigleman and there has
ZEN a general promotion along the
aricus stages in the office.
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

commercial Agent Mcdonald, of
he Iron Mountain, Is away on bust
1ess that will take him to many
Southeast Missouri points this week.
Agent Laid, of the /. c., and his
3orce are waiting patiently to get
nto. their new freight house al
Fourteenth and Commercial. The
shelving for the new depots that
viii be the housing place FOR records
md other freight memos are now
being put in. The new furniture Is
expected in day or two, and upon
is arrival the removal from the old
stone depot can be rapidly effected.
As a result of a series OF confer
ences between representatives of the
Illinois Central railroad and officers
If the Order of Railway Telegraph
'rs, more than 1000 telegraphers in
the employ Of the road have obtained
a new contract providing for an in
crease in pay. The wage schedule
has been arranged so that the in
oreases shall apply TO various tele-
yraphers in accordance with the re.
possibilities connected with their
work. The lowest amount of in
'reases is / per cent year It has
lso been arranged that six hours
hall constitute a Sunday working
lay providing that all the hours are
worked eonsecutively
The iron Mountain recently es.
ahlished the seventh of it's list Of
agricultural Demonstration Farm
or the benefit Of the farmers at
\rcadia, Mo. Like several other
ailroads the Missouri Pacific system
Nas placed these experiment propo-
itions throughout the states 81
Arkansas, Louisiana and Missouri
hey are worked out along the line
VI similar institutions established by
he Government. The object is to
instruct the farmer, by scientific
methods the better care of the soil
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

Harry Lind, another of Cairo's
Expert rate men, who has been re-
emily connected with the Halliday
Elevator Company, has again as
gumed his former position at the l..
2. as chief clerk. Agent Laid
Missed Harry SO that he just had to
nave him back, and since Harry
ouldn't resist the lure of railroad
work. nice increase in salary was
he happy medium that worked to
he satisfaction of employer and en-
ploye
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04
So II Goes.

Everything works In circle in
this world. One thing seems to COM
pensate for another, SO TO speak"
"Ilaur uou,9n
The Cairo bulletin., 1913-03-04

Commercial Agent Mcdonald, of
he Iron Mountain, Is away on bust
aess that will take him to many
Southeast Missouri points this week.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
MARQUARD, 1912 SENSATION
|M'GRAW'S BIG 1913 "IF"

kindly toward his great southpaw.
IF Marquard gets off to a fly
ing start;
IF he displays ability to beat
the other National league teams
about as he pleases, the summer
is sure to be a pleasant one not
only to Vanguard, but to McGraw
as we'll.
With the great port-side going
great guns, the Giants are form
liable aggregation. When the
RUDE Is getting his bumps regu-
larly things never look so promis-
ing.
IF Marquard's winning ability
is with him it is his salvation and,
to a certain extent, McGraw's,
who banks heavily upon his start.
IF Vanguard delivers he can
make the fans forget a lot of
things.
IF he fails 1t will only freshen
their memory.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
FARMER IS TOO
MUCH FOR
ROSS

FRANK Farmer defeated Billy
Ross in the main event of the
Eagles smoker last night at
Eagles hall. From the first min
ute 1t was plain to see that Far
mer would win. He used a right
hand shift that seemed to have
the number of the Centralia pro-
duct and had Farmer used his left
hand at all Ross would have had
trouble staying the four rounds.
Farmer demonstrated the fact
that he is possessed of punch,
by hitting Ross DON the forearm
and flooring him in the third
round.
The most interesting bout of
the evening, from the spectators
viewpoint, was the match be-
tween Hill and Neff. The boys
like to mix and went at it in
great style for the four rounds.
Hill showed lack of condition and
was in luck to get a draw.
Jack Mace was counted OUT in
the third in his fight with Sheca
and seemed to be glad of Il. He
merely stayed the time ana never
attempted to do Shock any dSm-
age.
The match between Hairy
Bishop and Foxey Miller had Jan
abrupt ending In the third round,
when Bishop connected with Mil
ier's jaw and then walked quietly
to his corner and started to re-
move his gloves. Bishop knew
Miller was there to stay till the
ten mark would be safely passed
at least.
Battling Christy and Jack How
ard went four rounds in slash
ing bout. Howard outweighed
Christy about ten pounds, but the
south Tacoma boy stood up and
changed blows with him as often
as he desired. These boys would
be a welcome attraction In a re-
turn match. Dick Forey lost his
match with George Smith in the
third round when the referee
stopped the match. Forev was
putting up game match, but was
getting the worst end when the
referee interviewed.
Harry Musson landed a swing
on Arthur Coles stomach in the
third round and Arthur sought
the canvas In most artistic man
ner.
A feature of the smoker last
night was the fact that over three
hundred rabid fans were turned
away. The Eagles hall has a ca
pacity of 700 and it sure was full
II was announced that another
smoker would be held in tbraa
weeks. The fans are anxious to
see Farmer in action against a
man his own weight and Womb
IKE to see him mix with Franz
hoepdey or Joe Bonds.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
BY BILLY EVANS,

Umpire of the American League.
Manager McGraw of the Giants
is confronted with a fist full of
1913 baseball Ifs"
The. little manager has faced
similar situations in the past and
has always proved himself mas
ter of the occasion. So, no mat
ter what happens to the Giants,
one can look for McGraw to be
fighting for the pennant.
IF in McGraw's 1913 vision is
Rube Marquard.
Winner of 10 straight games
last season and twice conqueror
of the Boston Red Sox In the
worlds series, Vanguard seems
destined to have a torrid summer.
Marquard has been an actor
this winter. Just how good he
is I cannot say, not having seen
him in his matinee idol role. Re-
Gently read the views of one
critic who, in commenting upon
Rube's vocal possibilities, wrote
as follows:
"Can Vanguard sing? Yes, like
Caruso-could pitch"
1t is probable RUDE will have
a chance to show his ability or
inability to stand criticism this
year. Much has been written of
him complimentary and the re-
verse this winter. The compli-
mentary stuff is soon forgotten,
but the criticism will be handed
to him constantly by the bleach
critics. Some of the things Mar
guard is reported to have said
about McGraw will not maze the
Little Napoleon" feel any too
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
MAY HOOK UP
TWO PLANTS

Finding that Tacoma can con-
meet its power plant with that OF
seattle the tSone-Webster crowd
Is getting little more mellow
and Nick Lawson is now flirting
with A. L. Kempster. Seattle man
ager of the Boston syndicate, with
a view to hooking up the two
plans here. Kempster says he
will take It up with Boston.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07

There were two good draws on
the program last night. Joe Hill
and Charles Neff did four rounds
and JACK Howard and Augie
Christy battled four rounds to
what the referee called draw.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07

Harry Bishop is anxious to
tangle with Danny OBrien of Sc
attic again. O'Brien holds de-
cision over the Tacoma boy and
Bishop is anxious to retrieve lost
honors.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
PLAN BIG RALLY

A general rally of Christian
Endeavor young people will be
held at the First Presbyterian
church tonight at which General
Secretary Shaw of the World c.
e. will speak.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07
KIRBY FUNERAL

The funeral of Edward Kirby,
who died at the county hospital
Wednesday, will be held from c..
c. Mellinger's tomorrow after
noon under the auspices of the To-
cal 1ongshoremen's union.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07

The best smoker staged in Ia
coma in months, ardent fight fans
said last night.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1913-03-07

That is sure going to be some
cross country race Saturday morn
ing. Gallagher is working like
a Trojan and is wearing a conf
dent smile. Lewtas is not saying
much, but he is wording neyerthe-
less.