Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1913-10-08

mind that when / find the right ons
I'll marry her, but I'm agolng 10 be
dead sure that she Is the right one.
amt agoing into Il bllndfold. I don't
buy no pig In no sack, me.
"'That sounds like sense says
4 don't say that II is sense. but II
sounds like H. How are you ag9lng
to find outg
BY using my eyes and my iudg-
ment, he says. I amt been applying
OF them In that direction afore, but
I'm going 10. It's a pipe! Amt ! IT
every kitchen door all times o. day?
Well. here's the way I'll find out
She's got 10 be neat and clean her.
self. to begin with. don't want no
sloppy wife. Well. II amt going &c
take me no time to find that much out.
Same way with the way she keeps
things. / step in TO fix winder
ketch or something and take notice
whether the floor Is scrubbed an
whether there's grease on the gas
range. | throw my eye on the sink
and squirt up at the ceiling for cob
webs. II the look OF things amt sat
isfactory, I cross her on right there
and don't waste no more time.
The next question is whether
she's a hustler, says Bill. II she's
up and busy bright and early II don't
take me long TO get hep. II the shades
fa dosun 90 bar baHronv, ..4fudar a.
half-past seven, count me out right
on that proposition. II she's singing
at her work she's got a cheerful dispo-
sition. II ! see the cat scooting every
time she picks up a broom. nix on
that. Not anyl Then I've got to find
out how she stacks up on the eats
How? Easyl | notice the garbage
can when ] 90 to empty It. II there's
a mess OF scorched cakes and maybe
the half of a roast and lot Of stale
bread and peck or 80 Of oatmeal like
there Is IN some. Il don't take no sher-
lock Holmes to figger out that she'll
waste about as much as her husband
can make and send him to the hos
pital with stummick trouble No sir,
the less garbage there is, the better
her chances1l be, says Bill. Not
when you've got the opportunities that
you've got around a fiat building
"'Wen says l, that sure sounds
like sense. And It is sense. That's
why I'm giving you the tip, Nels. You
/ take a little less notice of Hilda or
Helga or whatever her name is and a
little more of what she sets out for
you to empty. You've got the same
opportunities that Bill had.
What kind of a woman did Bill
get? Why, forgot to tell you about
that. One day he come to me look
ing pleased and told me that he'd
found the right one. A fine, cookbook.
ing girl she was. Cook and general
in II, where the Greenwalls are now
Always had on a clean dress and
apron, Bill said; kitchen as neat as a
pin. up at six sharp. sang like a blessed
lark and no waste. Me for her, says
Bill. It's just as easy to pick good
one as poor one, he says.
go to her. says I. And he did
the very next day. The only trouble
was, though, that she didn't fancy Bill
and in fact she throwed a dipper oil
hot water over him and told the ice
man and the iceman wiped up the
alley with him and Bill got so mad
that just to spite EN- he married q
girl that was Just leaving her place al
13 that he hadn't investigated Now
he says the best thing Teller car
do is to keep his eyes shut. Wher
he's married, anyway.
80 there it is, Nels," concluded the
ianitor as he got down from
the railing TITS all very well for (
man to be careful about taking his
pick, but he's got to be in shape t.
stand inspection himself"