New-York tribune., 1913-06-19
AS | WAS SAYING

Here is richness-a letter signed 20. c." with
which sentiment we in entire accord For 1t ap-
pears that the "Two-C Center IL bringing out this
lady's little dime novel; minus the passages that
might perhaps have thrown some light on its plot.
Yes and now comes Wild and piercing whoop
from y. G. c." whose masterpiece in THE North
Atlantic Sinker" reads backward; end chopped on
and stuck on I'm front, As The Sinker" is taken
largely by alienists. y. G. c." has ospoused an In
door existence. afraid TO stir out.
Sad cases both though we know sadder When
Mr. Mark Sullivan wrote that famous article, The
Of -" which turned politics galley endwise In
the great State Of -- and elevated old man -
to the Governorshp. a wicked editor amputated the
signature, thus delaying Mr. Suyans rise to emil
nence anywhere from ten 10 fifteen minutes.
II we chose could recite almost ferocious ad-
ventures Of our own but We are by this time old.
tough and strlngy, and no longer hdget. We warn
you however. that there worse terrors by far
than that dread banana peel Of literature. the re-
lection slip.
A restaurant. Temperature 212. Two gentlemen
sizzling at luncheon. First gentleman: Say a
scutte Of beer would go good about now" Second
gentleman Right you are!'
hospital. Ambulance at door. Cries the young
fellow in the white Jacket Hello. Doc! Business
is fine! Got couple moro OF 'em here; heat pros
trations; same old story. guess-beer with their
luncheon"
Moral: We have it from the Thermometer that
even Republicans should times forgive grape Juice
and cheer for the Beercss one
Good Dr. Josiah Odhed has discovered that al
though marriages made In heaven, they are too
often marred at the breakfast table" But we find
that they still oftener marred at the dinner
table This is because Of small patters. Statistics
teach that o. husbands out Of every 10 carve on
paters ruinous to tabecloths. shirt fronts. Golf
fures. wall paper ceilings and the moral nature Of
man. and child that the only logical conse-
quence is Reno.
silly Season whoppers quoted lower than ever
before and there is among serpents. gloom
among phantom arships and positive dishearten-
ment among seven legged chickens. What hope re-
mains for the independent producer when Congress
is to sit all summer?
Another has started, and promises to become a
worthy successor to How much wood would wood
chuck chuck II woodchuck could chuck wood?'
Many heretca versions OF the teaser are at
large. but the true form is follows and must be
strictly adhered to by the faithful:
BIZ had a billboard and Bill had a board BILL and
Bllrs board bill bored Bill TIL Bill sold Bills bill
board pay Bils board bill, and then Bits board
bill no longer bored Bill.
We shall yet get even with those OF our readers
who inquire anxiously, when you going to take
your vacation For shall return. and when We
do the air will be filed with fur and fea Tiers
mean to put In vacation developing the powers
Of our brain Already have filled out the free
coupon in "Tay Pays Weekly and mailed IT to the
enchanted address, % Henrietta street. London,
w. c. Prepare to shudder! In few brief weeks
we shall be neatly fitted up with all the modern i'm
provements in the prospectus
Concentration, VIII Power, Judgment
Ideaton, Creative Ability, Driving Force.
Decision. Initiative, Self Confidence
Verbum sap. Persons entertaining siman designs
upon the buzzsaw do so at their own risk.
And now there is talk OF a minimum for
poets! Bravo! We love the poets and devoutly
hope they will get 1t. r. l.. H.