davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
LADY MARY's DIET.
u Was Entirely Too Dainty TO Suit Her
italian Doctor.

u Was Entirely Too Dainty 20 Suit Her
italian Doctor.
That recipe Of the tallest Scotsman
in LOndOn-two meals a day and live
sOrever-would not have appealed TO
the Englishman Of the eighteenth cen
tury nor yet 10 the man who lived
abroad. Here, for instance. are a few
trihes which Lady Mary Montagu man
aged TO exist on in Italy:
Il wake about Z and drink half a pint
Of warm asses milk" she wrote. after
which sleep two hours. Then come
three large cups OF milk coffee and two
hours after large cup Of milk chocO-
late. Two hours later my dinner.
where l never fail 10 swallow a good
dish Il don't mean platel Of gravy soup.
with all the bread. roots. etc. belong
ing to IT, then eat the wing and the
whole body OF large fat @.pOn and a
veal sweetbread. concluding with a
competent quantity Of custard and
some roasted chestnuts."
Even then the day was not done
Lady Mary goes on: AT 3 in the after
noon take another dose OF asses milk
and for supper twelve chestnuts. one
new laid egg and a handsome pOrrin-
ger Of white milk" In these degener
ate days il would be thought that the
patient had done very we'll.
The eighteenth century Italian was
not so easily satisfied. The parish doc
tor marveled how Lady Mary managed
TO survive with such a finicking appe
tite.-LOndOn Chronicle.
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
THE TROOPERS PORTRAIT.
And the Conditions Under Which Il
Was Painted by Detaille.


NJ. Jules Claretie. who was a friend
OF Edouard Detaille. tells a charming
anecdote OF the famous painter in the
Paris Temps. One day a young troop
er rang at his studio door and asked II
NJ. Detaille would mind taking his like
ness.
"who sent you to meT' asked De
tallle.
My good comrades OF the regiment
who say that you are jolly good at
catching likeness. and as l wanted tC
send a Christmas present to my people
l thought / would have my portrait
done by you. How much will you
charge meT'
How much have you in your pock
et?" asked Detaille
''Twenty-slx francs" And the troop
er pulled out the money, tied up IN bis
handkerchief. adding. Perhaps thai
won't be enoughI"
"Oh. yes. lots" said Detaille "Si
down" And he had soon painted th,
soldiers portrait on a small wood pan
el. There you are. hope your peo
pie will like IT,"
Il think they will" said the trooper
1T isn't bad at ALL" And he unite,
the four corners Of the handkerchief {,
pay Detaille his 20 francs.
But Detaille stopped him. NO. Keel
your money But you must do tw,
things-frst Of all. spend II all Il
drinks TO my health. and secondly
don't send me your comrades TO hav
their portraits done. should be over
worked"
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
A Bare Film.

Madam. understand that your
daughter helps you daily with your
homework"
1T Is true"
what royalties would you charge
me for moving picture reel OF this
most unusual sightT - Cincinnati
Times-Star.
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
The Helpful Man.

Any man who. by sound thinking and
hard work. develops and carries on q
productive industry and by his good
Judgment makes that industry both
profitable and stable confers an i'm.
mense benefit on society.-Charles W.
Eliot.
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
The Real Ro.s

Il doubt II Kitty win be happy when
married She's always had her own
way too much"
"oh. but Jack win let her DO any
thing"
I'm not thinking about her husband.
but about her cook. ."-Boston Tran.
script.
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
nnth AnL.-

4 don't understand why my watch
VIII not 60" said staylate. "I'm sure
it's wound upr'
Dear me-" yawned his hostess, look.
Ing toward the clock. "what a remark.
able coincidenceF'-St Louis Post.D .Dls
patch
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
He Told Her.

Shell wish knew how could
make you extremely happy. dear Kari
He-Well. write TO your father and
ask him to double your dowry.-Meg
gendOrfer Blatter.
Smyrna times., 1913-03-12
An Old lake R.told

Friend-The public will miss you
now you have left the stage. Actor
That's why left ! dislike being hit
London Standard.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
ALSO NORTH AND T

Enthusiastic boosters for better
roads are doing great things to i'm
prove the highways across the state.
Nearly all the roads that r being pro-
jected or improved are from east to
west. What's the idea? Is it not
true that nearly all the railroads run
east and west, the big through trunk
lines paralleling each other from one
coast to the other, while the travel
from north to south and south to north
is taken care Of for the most part
not entirely however-by stub and
branch lines? just as a suggestion,
would it not be a good plan to improve
the roads towards the north and the
south? If there were good roads In
those directions, those Of US who are
fortunate enough to have autos. could
pull out Of Ottumwa some hot morning
and after a day or two of nice motor
ing, reach the cooler north. In the
same way when the chill breezes Of
winter begin blowing, a few days Of
autoing would put us in the south.
There is just as much to be seen
north and south as there is east and
west but not nearly the facilities for
going.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
Daddy's Bedtime
~ The Wise
IV- Dog Leaned
To Keep Quiet.

INSIDE the window sheppie was barking loudly. shall I ell him
to keep quiet daddyr" Jack asked.
"You might put your head out Of the window ana sec what is the
trouble" daddy suggested.
Jack did q. Then he drew in his head and said: 1T was the Green's cat
on the fence. sheppte always barks Al strange CATS"
"That Is 10 more than can be expected" said daddy. Our Tabby has
always chased them away. and I suppose sheppie thinks he 10 taking her part
in doing the same.
Just Is well to fnd out what that reason is before you tell him to keep quiet
"Once on a time a cross, grabbed old mserb bought himself a dog. He
wanted it to watch his house 10 that n o could come about without Is
"He brought the dog home and tied him up near the house. Then he went
Then he went out to hd out what his dog was barking about
Though he searched all about he couldn't find any n Then he gave
his dog II beating and went back to bed Nt@
"The next night the dog began to bark again. and again the mber went
down and looked around. but could see no ne Again he beat the dog and
went % bed. I#"&## s@ ##=.
THE third night the poor dog was SO discouraged that It kept quiet when
q man in a black mask came creeping out Of the clump Of bushes. nan
had hidden there for two nights waiting for q chance to get into the old
miscrs cellar, where his money was said to be hidden
~ will only be beaten for my trouble the dog said to himself, and . he
did not bark this time.
"The robber opened the cellar window and crawhed in. He didn't find any
money in the cellar, for the miser didn't keep it there
when the miser got up he found that some n had been In tn house N
the dog had not barked. He wa going to beat it again when a passing neigh
Dor asked him what a the matter The miss told him |I
"You Ounce the neighbor said; I've seen a stranger prowhng over there
in the shrubbery for the Lasts couple Of nights: The dog was barking at him
No doubt the man was mdden somewhere each time you came out How can
you punish the dog for keeping quiet last night when you punished III poor
beast for his faithful watchfulness on two former nights? It 10 hiss stupid
master who should be punished"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
Sidewalk Sketches
~ Howard l.. Ram
S IL G L N G..

Singing is a lippy substitute for real
music which is caused by opening the
as widely as possible and pro-
the voice into space. If the
is not well known there is u.s.
ually plenty of space to project into,
but II she has reached4the point where
the music critics refer to her as an
'artiste," she will find the room crowd
ed so full of double-distilled culture
that the man who came in hoping to
something familiar couldn't
get out without using a jimmy.
Some people begin to sing at an
early. age and keep 1t up without the
slightest regard for the feelings of
others. This is particularly true of
choir singers, who hang on long after
everybody would be highly pleased to
a change both in timber and the
personnel. Opera singers never let
90 SO long as they can keep within six
cubic feet of the key In which they
started, and they seldom retire without
getting rid Of a series Of frost-bitten
farewell recitals.
Singing is always the result Of some
method. There are several different
but they all produce the same
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

One Ottumwa ice dealer at least IL
not to be outdone in generosity by a
dealer in any Illinois city. Frederick
Field, president OF the Ottumwa Pure
Ice Co., has offered to aid the Courier
ic, fund to the extent Of n ton q
week. That means 1900 pounds Of the
cooling crystal available for the use
of sick children who might otherwise
die for lack Of it during weather such
as has been with us for sometime
past. There are other generous peo-
pie who have added their mite to the
fund and it is growing. Ottumwans
r not going to let the children suffer
at any rate.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

we have water on this earth-people
r going to put out in boats and as
long as they do that, there will be
cases Of sudden dimensions. Why
not admit this fact and prepare for it.
To seek to avoid drowning by not
learning to swim is as ridiculous as It
would be to try curing q sick stomach
by never eating.
Every parent owes it to their son
and their daughter to teach them to
swim. There is plenty of opportunity
to have it done right and without any
danger. Practically every Y. M. c. A.
In the land has q swimming tank, and
many cities have natatoriums willis
there are beaches or swimming places
at most river cities where there are
plenty Of good swimmers who will be
glad to aid in teaching the art.
A boy or girl who has not been
taught to swim is going into the battle
Of life with insufficient armor, with
the head protected, but the heart ex-
posed.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

low-spirited sensation in the man who
does not care for any form Of classical
music except the Traumerei with varia-
tons. Most people prefer the natural
method Of singing, which induces the
singer to remove his collar and necktie
and clutch nervously at his throat
mechanism when about to climb some
forbidden steep.
There are two kinds Of singing
straight and wabbly. People who sing
in a straight line are at a great disad-
vantage, for whenever they wander q
few yards from the accompaniment
and hold a high, tone with the utmost
.firmness and satisfaction they create
a large, sour gap which Is apparent to
everybody who is not already in q
state Of coma. On the other hand, the
singer who produces a tone which re
sembles an outline map showing the
fuctuation in the price of wheat over
a period Of thirty years can sing in
nine different keys on intake with
out causing anybody in the audience to
repine in short, curt syllables.
Singing is all right in its place, but
most Of it is 70 poorly placed that It
hurts.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
Press Comment.

Marion Register: The old time
sentiment In favor Of steam railroads
in Iowa seems to be dead. About all
we hear or read about them now IL,
"d---n EN-" One the stump, In the
sanctum and in Legislative halls. the
same. And yet they have been the
chief factor In the development Of
the peerless state.
Sioux City Journal: Only a few
handfuls OF voters are registering as
p~rogressives under the New York
registry law. This may not, however,
mean that progressiveism iE New
York Is as dead as populism. 1t may
mean only that the progressives are
lying low with q view to Turing on
the overconfdent republicans and
democrats.
Cedar Rapids Gazette: Devotees Of
the r~iver-to-river road and the boost
ers for the great white way are die
putting over the merits OF the two
highways. The boosters OF one claim
that their road is a few miles shorter
than the other. But the length of the
highways across Iowa Is not mater
ial so long as the roads are in good
condition. That is the main thing.
Des Moines Capital: The board Of
supervisors has decided to have the
county roads dragged after each
shower. It Is we'll. II there were
some way of getting the unpaved
roads within the city dragged after
each shower or even dragged at all,
thousands of citizens would rise up
and call the city fathers blessed.
Council Bluffs Nonpareil: Justice
Deemer Of the supreme court Is &C
cused Of pitching the first curve balls
In Iowa In our great national game.
And he may be guilty. No one knows
as yet. All the evidence is not yet
submitted. But, however this may
be, 1t is clearly in evidence that the
liquor interests of the country hava
never been able to score much since
he went into the supreme court box,
Keosauqua Republican: Talk about
lobbying! We would wager a coon
skin, II we had It, that no Iowa leg
islature ever endured more persisten:
lobbying than the last one. One SEN
ator told u that a certain fellox
made him and others awfully tired
by hanging around the senate cham
Der every, day, boring it's members
by automatically talking capitol ex.
tension grounds instead Of staying
in his ONCE and attending to the
work for which the state paid HIM.
The lobbying wa for big game-thc
putting Of q debt on the state, for
the taxpayers Of the state to pay for
|a capitol park flower garden at Des
Moines which will amount to mil
lions Of dollars providing the courts
sanction the thing by not allowing
the people to express themselves on
the matter at the polls az the consti.:
tuition Of the state plainly says thoy
may,
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
ADDITIONAL HOSPITAL FAcILI-
TIES NECESSARY.

A body Of public spirited citizens
have Undertaken the task of raising
$4,000 to $4,000 in order to provide
Ottumwa with additional hospital
facilities. The Ottumwa hospital is
doing q great work and not turning
any away from its doors who need its
services, but nevertheless there is a
crying need for either an addition to
it or another hospital. The latter plan
has been adopted and the directors Of
the Ottumwa hospital look with favor
on it. Fifteen thousand dollars is a
very small amount to pay for the SER
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
FOR LIFE.

IntelhRent and cOnciOus parents go
to no little expense In preparing their
children for the struggle Of life and It
IA the proudest boast Of many that
their sons and daughters go forth pre-
nared to meet the rest of the world on
an equal footing. AS far az the equal
footing is concerned, it may be true,
but It Is q fact nevertheless that too
nan Of our young people not merely
fail OF success but actually lose their
lives because Of improper training.
How many children are taught to
swimf
During the past month-and the
same is true every year-hundreds OF
drowning have been reported In the
press Of the country. Ninety-nine per
cent were persons unable to swim.
They got into water in some manner
or other and were helpless to ever
make ! struggle for life. They couldn't
oven keep afioat until aid reached
them. They were doomed when they
fell in.
Ten to one, their inability to swim
resulted from the fear of their mother
on father that they might be drowned
II they freqnented the "old swimming
hole or the natatorium long enough
to learn the art Of sustaining the body
at the surface Of the water. The fear
Of the parent, rather than the water.
caused the drowning. Had there been
careful instruction in swimming in
stead OF careful instruction to keep
away from the water, there would
have been no drowning.
OF course it must be granted that If
4 person is dumped into the middle Of
the ocean or some big lake, the
chances Of gwen an excellent swimmer
are little better than those Of the
novice, still the fact is that most Of
the dFownings occur a few feet from
the shore or from the overturned boat
either OF which would mean safety to
the M in the water.
Few things are more pathetic than
the story of an able bodied man or
woman sinking for the third time just
as help was at hand.
Parents who are really DESTROYS OF
fitting their children for the struggle
OF life should among the very first
things, prepare them for the Inevitable
plunge into the water. AS long as we
have rivers and lakes-yes as long as
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

yesterday. His name is Chope, and
he's got q barrel Of money and goes
with the swell crowd"
Stop, Ralph!"
And you are my aunt. Virginia
Wheeler. and your dad owns six
plantations and can hardly count
his money. Gee! How sober you
both look! I looked just that way
when ! had the measles!"
Central Park has a romance hid
den under every bush, and they II
ways have a happy ending.
And you just g II this don't!!''
says Ralph.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03
4 cIrYs HEALTH.

The health Of every city Is depend
ent upon its ordinances on sanitation.
"Show me the city that has no sewer
ordinance or fails to enforce one,
and I'll show you a disease hole" It
Is not unlikely that the question OF
sanitation was the frst one taken up
when primitive mar first gathered in
communities. As the years have rolled
by, methods Of securing and assuring
sanitation have improved and today
there is no excuse for any city which
is not right up to the minute IN the
disposal Of its waste. No city is SO
blind as not to recognize the need for
sanitation provisions in It's ordinances,
but many are lax about enforcing these
provisions until they have suffered a
great calamity which might have
been averted. Cities, like men, that
are in good health, are careless and
thoughtless OF their blessing and only
when they are seized In the grip OF
c%ontas1on, do they appreciate the
enormity OF the crime called neglect.
Ottumwa has q very fair health ordi-
nance which II followed to the letter
will prove q reasonably efficient safe
guard against the diseases which fol
low II the wake Of neglected sanitary
provisions. A comprehensive sewer
system covers the greater part OF the
city, enabling every house to enjoy
its dement's. But like q chain, a city
Is no stronger against disease, thansis
it's weakest link. One house in which
no sanitary provisions exists, set down
among a hundred which are Of the
most modern idea, Gan work untold
harm. Disease can be bred there n
spread throughout the neighborhood
and eventually the entire city will SUI
fer. Unfortunately, the n~eglectful,
slothful n IL not al a general rule
the worst sufferer. The man who is
doing his best to. protect himself and
his ne4ghb6r II often the one that is
hurt the most
There is q disposition now on the
part Of some Of the city's property
owners to avoid the expense OF con-
Meeting up with the sewer system.
And unfortunately there seems to be
q disposition on, the part Of a member
OF the council to encourage this. Tn
stock excuse which Is used to oppose
public improvement-lack Of ready
money-is used. Some n is too
poor to- afford it, .-.
As q matter OF fact we all ought to
feel that wesare too poor not toaanord
It. It is the same old story Of the
stitch in time. A hundred dollars
spent for modern convenknces may
render unnecessary a doctor bill run
ming away past that figure and ending
up eventually In q death. And death
-speaking in q cold, hard, materi;.l
ways expensive.
Ottumwa's health Is too important
4 matter to let a few hundred dollars
stand in the way. The law Of self
preservation would demand that my
neighbor must take the same precau-
lions to protect my health, that l do
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

Dispatches tell us that Mrs. Wood
row Wilson and one Of her three
daughters have gone to the presidents
summer home at Cornish, N. H. It is
said also that in the true Jeffersonian
style affected by the president, the
pair. took with them only ~thirty-one
servants or attendants and forty-one
trunks. Who said anything about
the newly rich"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

Duluth, Mimi, can tell how 1t feels
to have too much Of a good thing.
Saturday when Ottumwa vas swelter-
ing to the tune OF 100 degrees above,
Duluth citizens were running around
in overcoats and blowing on their
fingers to keep warm.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

The good work has been started on
the roads. The city council is repair
ing those in the city and the board Of
supervisors Is improving those Just
outside Of the city. Ottumwa has
ceased to be an island for nonce at
least and farmers are invited to come
in and see how it feels. Those who
have been churning by the bump sys-
tenn while coming to town, will be the
only losers.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1913-07-03

give Adam,s correct weight or Ewes
waist he wouldn't have been
boxed IN any tighter. He had gradu-
ated al college he had made the
grand tour he had been south win
ter after winter-he had devoured his
barrels Of eanut when q boy, and
yet he stood there like q bump on q
log and wished that fresh young kid
In Halifax.
"Can't YOU tell r. was demanded.
"Nhy. Ralph. OF course he CAM
said his aunt.
"Then vhy don't her"
CT have never seen peanuts
growing" Mr.. Chope managed to say.
"But l am from Virginia, which is
a ereattstate for peanuts, and I have"
said the girl. "They grow in the
! ground like potstoes."
"fII find somebody that knows
something II I have to walk clear
across the park" muttered the lad
as he started OF.
"Yoil will excuse him, ~please?"
ooh. certainly"
"They don't teach peanut lore at
Yale
II believe not /.
Both smiled and Mr.. Chope passed
on. He had had an adventure. ne
had been Inundated by the BOY, y
the girl had taken MS part An aunt,
was she. That meant mat sne nad a
sister or brother IN town. she was
in charge OF q boy. Did tnaI mean
that she wasaa poor relative and
serving as governess! she was good
looking; had the voice ana nanners
Of a lady, and II misfortune mad
placed her IN a menlal posltion II
was to be deplored. he ought 70 nave
dismissed the incident as the merest
trifle, but he didn't. One reason WY
he didn't was the temperance OF the
boy, Ralph. He came racing out OF q
side path TO Say:
You ought 70 nave $1,000 iDy =
feller!!"
wei Tvs FOUND out ~ PARK
policeman that aunt - ight, y !
amt going 70 tell mel = one . pulieu
up enough as II ls. you Want "
know all about ner7
Hush"
"Oh, ! wasn't going 10 Tell you .
single thing
Much to Mr.. Chope's surprise he
found Central Park q picturesque, en-
joyable place. He saw trees and
bushes and vines and lawns and foun-
tains where he had looked for . COW
pasture and a shed. He had also met
d young lady who didn't dress In Hun
garian costume and wear wooden
shoes. Was she a governess? Would
she be there the next morning? Would
he be there?
II she were there and he were there
should he walk right past her and
look the other way, or should he al
most halt and raise his hat Mr..
Chope went over these important
queries in. his mind a score OF times,
and he felt boredom slipping away
| from him as he cogitated and debated.
He was falling asleep to dream OF be-
Ing crushed under a carload OF pea
nuts when he made up his mind. He
would simply saunter into the park