The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1913-01-18
oHAPTER !.
The. Beauty oontsst.


"You have phiz on YER said ths
Watermelon. with rare oandor. that
would make NANCY pup unhappy
II suppose you think yer Venus"
eneered James. = remark that he nat
tered himself was rather CLASSY"
The Watermelon sighed as one
would over the ignorance Of q child,
'No." said he. hardly"
Don't let that bloomin' modesty OF
yers keep yer from tellin' the truth
adjured James.
The Watermelon waved the posi-
bility aside with airy grace. with
all due rnodesty, James," said he, II
can't claim to be q woman"
mot with that hay on yer mug"
agreed Mike, casting a sleepy eye up
ward from where he lay in lazy con,
tent in the long. sweet grasses unde.
the butternut tree.
when was kid, I took a prize
in beauty show" announced James,
with pardonable pride. II was three,
I remember. q cute little cuss. MY
hair was yellow and ma curled it-you
know how-all fuzzy-and / had a
little white dress on. 1t was county
fair. got the first prize for the best
lookin' kid and was mugged for the
papers. If I was shaved now and had
on some glad rags. I'd be lady killer,
all right. all right"
'Longside Of me-" said the Water.
melon. you'd look like a blear.eyed
son Of a toad"
"You! Why, you'd make q balky
horse run, you would"
when me hairs cut, I'm bloomin'
Adonis, hot Venus" and the Water.
melon drew languidly at an old brown
pipe, warm and comfortable in the
pleasant shade, where soft breezea
wandered fltfully by, laden with the
doors of the fields in June.
Beauty" said James with charm
Ing naivete, runs in my family"
: 1T went SO fast in the beginnin',
then, yer family never had q chance
to catch up" returned the Water.
melon. "We1l have a beauty show,
Just us two"
!, Inspired by the thought, he sat up
kosexplatn, and Mike opened his eyes
long enough to look each over with
], slow4 seornful derision and . knocking
grunt.
James fondled the short stir hair
pm his cheeks and chin and waited
: tor developments.
The Watermelon went on. 1--WE will
meet this afternoon. here, see? Shaved
and with decent buds on. And Mike
can pick the winner"
mike! He can't tell a sick cat
! from we'll one"
That's all right. He knows enough
to tell the best lookin' one between
you and me. A blind mug could do
that" !.
"But-"
eve haven't anyone else, you mutt.
We can't have too much publicity in
this show. dislike publicity anyway,
at any time, and especially when I
have on clothes. borrowed, as you
might say, for the occasion. II the
gang was here. we could take q vote,
but SEEM that they amt, we got to
do with what we got"
The cost Of livin' is goin' up 30
these days, it's gettin' hard even to
batter a handout," groaned Mike,
whose idea Of true beauty consisted
Of a full stomach and q shady place
to sleep on long quiet Sunday after
noon. II amt goin'' to get every place
soured on me. II the public gets any
more stingy, I'll have to give up de
turf for Twin, that's all. To throw
gag will be harder den hod-carryin'."
I'VE amt goin' to hurt the burg
pone," said James.
He rose languidly and stretched.
you be here this afternoon, Mike,
about three, see; or I'll knock yer
block OF. It's a nice quiet hangout
and far enough from the village to be
safe. I'm goin' to get shave and
borrow some buds from the bloomin'
hosiery up yonder to do honor to de
occasion" He knocked the ashes
from his pipe and slipped it into his
pocket. IF you don't get the clothes
and de shave, Watermillion, you'll be
counted down and out, see?"
"Sure." agreed the Watermelon,
He lay at length on the ground be.
heath the butternut tree and James
paused a moment to run his eye criti.
cally. over him, from his lean face
with its two-weeks' growth Of beard
to his ragged. clumsy shoes. James
smiled grimly and drew himself up to
his full height with Just pride. He
was six feet two in shoes that might
as we'll have been stockings for all
they added to his height. His shout.
ders were broad and muscular. with
the gentle play Of great muscles in
perfect condition. His neck. thougl,
short, was we'll shaped and sinewy.
not the short thick neck OF prize.
fighter or bull. His hips were mar
row and his limbs long and straight.
Beneath his open shirt one saw his
bronze throat and huge chest. A
splendid specimen Of the genus homo.
for all the rags and tatters that served
as clothes.
The Watermelon was a bit shorter.