davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
WERE THEY BOTH JOKING,

This IL one Of the best stories at
the copitol: Before taking his seat
in the new congress. Representative
Fred A. Britten Of Chicago paid q
visit to Panama, accompanied by Mrs.
Britten, q strikingly handsome young
woman and several other congress.
men and their wives. President Por-
ras of Panama rendered an elaborate
farewell reception to the party. he
took Mrs. Britten's hand in both his,
and bowed very low. u
"Oh, you beautiful lady, you beau.
tiful lady, good-by." the president
said.
Cut 1t out. Mr.. President. or I'll
kick you on the SHIN" said Represent
alive Britten.
!; President Porras stepped back
aghast. s2
"Oh. no, no. no: was only Joking"
he said earnestly, and Britten made
the same excuse.
TITS hard to say who was the most
embarrassed. President, Porras, his
wife, Mrs. Britten or myself" says
the former Chicago alderman. ~
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
sHukRl PAsHA, REAL HERO OF ADRIANoPLE

tary geniuses that ever lived. From
the outset of he>attack on Adrianople
his soldiers came to love him like q
father, and his portrait shows him a.
he actually is-7shrewd, vigilant, deter
mined, man OF iron courage, shorn Of
all Illusions, but with infinite kindli.
hess Of character and heart.
Never was q siege conducted more:
rigorusly than that concentrated on
! drianople. From the outset no single
scrap of reliable information was al.
lowed to leak out to the waiting CIVIL.
lied world. One fact alone gave the
anxious Turks In the capital comfort.
That was the assurance Of those with
positive knowledge that tAdrianople
was the one spot In Turkey on which
military funds had been properly ex-
pended, and that Adrianople was prac-
itically impregnable to all forces zat the
command Of King Ferdinand and his
friends. SS IL, h
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
POLITICAL LEADER NEVER AT A CONVENTION

It 10 q remarkable fact that 20 AZ
% the recollection Of any Democrat
In Texas goes Mr.. House never ~
tended q political convention IN this
STATE. He was never present at apo
litical gathering Of any kind. He was
never seen about the capitol when the
legislature was In session, although
he has had great deal to DO with
the shaping of the laws during the last
20 years. About the only time ne
was seen in the big granite building
where the seat Of government 10 10
Gated was when Mr.. Culberson was
elected United States senator. Even
on that momentous occasion he occu-
pied an inconspicuous seat Ia the gal
lery and hurried away from the
throng as soon AZ the formalities OF
the election were over. Notwithstand-
Ing his power in state politics and
ths fact that he was responsible more
than any other one man or set OF
men for election Of three govern
ors. he never visited them In their o.
nee more than once; or twice.
III Nj. House ishoSld give any pub
lie expression on Y the subject Of his
unoficial connection with the Wilson
administration, he would doubtless
disclaim influence in the appoint
ments to public ONCE that have al
ready been made or those that may
be made. His close political friends
in Texas, however, give him credit for
the naming ,of Albert Sidney Burle-
son as postmaster general. and OF
David F. Houston as secretary OF
agriculture. 1t is also asserted that
Mr.. House acted as intermediary be-
tween Col William ]. Bryan and Pres.
ident Wilson, and 1t was through his
efforts largely that Col Bryan was In
duced to accept the state portfolio.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
ruMuLTY GERS GLORY.

Z IL, ! H-,f d g. b.. L. )
Masculine America should look with
awe and admiration today upon Id
seph Tumulty, secretary to the presi.
dent, who, rising to the occasion.
fired. his cook and lives to tell about
It. Nh lF'2Ef4tEi .ttst. ~. r.. b. ii
II is an easy matter to bluff ONCE
seekers. to be- an assistant president
and to know more than an encyclope-
dia but to tell the queen. Of the
kitchen that her reign is over Is a
different matter go -. 4. ~
There we're no scars noted on Sec
rotary Tumulty, though it must be
confessed he had a rather relieved.
well satisfied air as he went about
his White House duties. T
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Iowa State Bystander.
BYsTANDER PUH. Co. Publishers,
DIES MONIES. co.. IOWA
ELEPHANTS HARD TO PLEASE
They Havs Delicate Tastes and Can
not Dc Easily Deceived II
Their Eating.

II Since the elephants digestive func
eicns are very rapid. It requires large
amount OF fodder daily about coo
pounds in most cases. In it, wild state
che elephant feeds heartily but waste
fully. It u careful In selecting the few
forest trses that 1t likes for their bark
or foliage, but It will tear down
Aranches and leaves half Of them un.
Aouched. It will strip OF the bark
from other trees and throw away .
aarge portion.
AZ Il 10 q nocturnal animal. It -
Dscts its trees by the senses Of touch
and smell, says Harper's Weekly. Its
sense Of smell 10 said to be 90 delicate
dat Q Wild elephant can wind an enc
my at distance OF 1000 yards. and
the nerves Of its trunk are 30 sensitive
hat the smallest substance can be
discovered and picked up by Ito tiny
proboscis.
An elephants palate 10 very deli.
cate and the animal II whisical In se.
lecting or rejecting morsels Of food.
a writer tells Of an incident humor
cusly illustrative Of the whims OF Q
tame elephant belonging to the police
of Dhurrbri.
This elephant was fed with rice and
plantains. The stems OF the plantains
were split and cut into transverse
sections two feet In length. Three
quarters OF pound Of rice was placed
within each tube Of plantain stem.
One day while the elephant was being
fed some one offered it q small sweet
biscuit. It was taken in the trunk and
almost Immediately thrown on the
ground.
The mahout, thinking that the ele-
plant had behaved rudely, picked up
the biscuit and inserted It in a parcel
Of rice within plantain stem. This
was placed In the beasts's mouth and
1t the very first crunch 1t showed Its
disgust BY refusing the whole mess
The small biscuit had disgusted the
animal and for several minutes 1t tried
by it's inserted trunk to rake out every
atom from its tongue and throat.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
seek DEATH DATA.
Investigation Of infant Mortality
to Be Thorough.
Probe 10 Reach Small ~ Wei! a.
Large Cities, and Work win es y
Taken Up and Completed IN
One Place at Time.

Washinston.--An investigation OF
infant mortality that Ia something out
OF the ordinary has just been inangu-
rated by the children's bureau Of the
department OF labor. 1t Is different
In that it goes out of the beaten tracks
OF such Investigations. Instead OF
going through the large cities It will
cover the smaller towns, where the
mortality records are not kept so
completely ~ IN the larger cities.
Miss julia C. Lathrop, chief OF the
children's bureau. who has just r.
turned from q visit to the south, de.
clared that while the investigation
had been started she could pot ut
this time estimate when the data
would be complete or even approx.
mateiy estimate how long It would
take to compile the data, leaving out
the amount Of time which will be
consumed in tabulating it and putting
1t into shape where any sort OF con-
illusions may be reached.
The work will be taken up and
completed in one city at q time.
This, Of course. will require more
time than II 1t were started stimuli
taneously in various parts of the
country. but under the circumstances
this latter course cannot be pursued.
The investigators will 60 to q town
and take the births for given year.
Having ascertained these the real
work will begin. For the probers
will seek to learn the conditions un-
der which the babies were reared and
whether they survived the first and
subsequent years of their young life.
Not only will the questions cover
the period Of the baby's early life,
but will take into consideration every
condition under which the child lived.
Whether It's parents we're able to pro-
vide 1t with sufficient nourishment;
whether 1t attended school, and II 1t
did, how long; whether or not 1t was
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
BE CHARITABLE, DEAR READER.

One Of the boys in family on the
East side came home from school
the other day with the following al.
lucrative squib: @'
Woodrow Wilson's wife washes
Whitehouse. windows which Washing,
toms wttfs hwashedss .s:'H 'Ftt <75<&4
II can beat 'that." said his big
brother. i .sE' 80 f. .~ L.
Woodrow Wilson's wife washes
with warm water Washington's
Whitehouse windows which Washing
tons wife washed while Washington
was Within" ss,ss..- ~, I
The, head of the family then took
q turn: $3.50 " t..,. !
Wise, witty, Woodrow, Wilson's
winsome wife washes with warm wa.
ter Washingtons Whitehouse win
dows which Washington's wife wash
ed while Washington was waiting
within" ,,a.. 10
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Australian irrigation Scheme.

Good progress Is being made on the
Murrumbidgee irrigation area. of the
great water conservation scheme OF
the New South Wales government.
The agent-general has been notified
that $4,000 acres OF land have been
taken up to date, and there are. now
1858 farms. exclusive Of 80 farms re-.
Gently selected on the new area at
Mirrool. All fodder plants have done:
we'll, notably lucerne. Tobacco plant
ing is being vigorously proceeded with.
and there are now 100000 tobacco
plants thriving In settlers holdings.
The dairy cattle purchased by the gov
eminent and sold to settlers are Civ
Ing very good results The butter fac
tory on the area viii be manufactur-
Ing this month. Poultry raising 10 r.
tracing considera BILE attention, many
settlers who brought their fowls with
them netting IS per week from eggs
alone within . few weeks Of going into
occupation Of their holdings. @
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
oysters Ar acrsspers.r

The recent case 81 which . New
York Judge was called upon to decide
whether q turtle n an animal or q
reptile, reminds one that even Frank
auckland was puzzled when asked .
somewhat similar question by pr.
Nathan Adler. father and predecessor
Of the late chief rabbi. ..,. ls5b
Il, Dr.. Adler wanted to know whether
Jews might lawfully eat oysters.
auckland had to consult Dean Stanley
@ to the Interpretation Of the Mosaic
law, and together they pondered the
question, do oysters creep" Eventu-
ally this was answered in the afhrma-
tive, and oysters have since been
CHASED Is forbidden food by the ortho-
dor Jew.-New York Sun. 4g
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

them, and have vivid recollection
OF my own childhood, writes Eleanor
Gates in the New York American. Be-
sides, my mother died when was
fourteen, leaving little sister Of six
to my care. T.. ! brought her up. And
my sister was married and has q lit.
tie son Of ten, whom am busily help
ing to bring up. Also 14have been a
teacher. sss s.
MyEstudy 81 children has convinced
me thst children are little animals
until they are ten years old, intent
upon getting enough to eat and drink
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
I. oussr Nan..s - I. :. Lists.

35sa oussr Names On n. .. Lists. :S b
New and strange Indian names con-
tinually are being addsd TO the gov
eminent pay rolls. The treasury de-
partment yesterday sent warrants
drawn to the order OF the following.
q allottees OF lands In the west:
\ Mary Full Stomach, John Brings
Homo the Baby. George Circle Fool.
kettle Woman, Susan Howling Horse.
she Paints Her Shoes. Helen Crows.
Ike water, and Edward Useful Heart.
h indian nomenclature has full play
on this pay roll. tho most interesting
ii the nles Of the government.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
virIis Dasqus Language.

Il Ii said that though the Basque
Language, which II spoken in the Py-
fenees, II one Of the most dimcult Of
al languages to acquire, the youngest
child, conscious Of his own thought,
caa express> himself perfectly In It. It
u averred that In vigor and word
painting. this II the richest Of all Ian.
guages. This may be partly due to
the fact that nouns. pronouns. and ad-
1ectives change into verbs at will, and
verbs may be transformed into nouns
and adjectives. Every part Of speech,
and even the letters Of the alphabet,
can be declined like nouns, and ad-
:ectives are corrugated like verbs
Harper's Weekly. pa
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

side by side in the center OF the road
between the boundary posts OF their
respective countries the German
post on one side OF the road, the
French post on the other-7and pose
together very amicably for joint
photograph, each soldier OF course re-
naming within his own territory. III
From the commercial point Of view;
this is an admirable arrangement-it
does much TO maintain the staple
trade Of LA Schlucht--the trade An
picture post cards representing pre-
cisely this incid lent. New York Sun.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
xlolst Was N eeded at Once.

When certain darby of Moblle,S
Ala, announced hiS engagement 70
the dusky one Of his choice, the con-
gratulations that were showered upon
him Included note Of wonder.
\ 5"Joe, said one Of these friends'
II shore .is surprised! Veal never
thought you'd speak up. It's going on
two years sence you begun to 1oo'
around Miss Violet" 81, I.
Oats true said Joe; but de 1ac.
is, old man, didn't lose my job unu'
last night. -" Judge.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
simple ] n athematies

'IIoo Is It, Jeemes, that ye max ..
an enairmous profit al yer potatoes
Yer price is lower than ither IN ~
toon and We max extra Reductions -
yer friends" III.
"Weel, ye see, ! knock an twa sn'
Inns q ton because customer
freend q mine. an then ! Jest "a
twa hundert-weight aft the ton
cause I'm a frsend O. his. "-Puncn'
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

flnd the path Of life. ~ Is the way.
We must walk with Jesus II we would
learn to live. No more talk shout him.
but actual Fellowship with him.
makes a "life hid with Christ IA God"
Come and SEQ, " said he to thoss who
wished to know where he resided. A
knowledge 81 Gods word, which saves
and keeps from sin. goes far In pre-
pairing men for life 10 teaching them
how to 1--we. Thy word have I hid In
my heart that j may not sin against
thee. Blessed ii the agent that
keeps us from sin. N
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
j Rud.,v !. 'pi.pelIinu an illusion.

Rudsly DispelIino an Illusion. -
Il Harry, dear. you don't tnlnA
there's anybody on the train that SUI
poets we have just been married anu
are on our wedding trip. do you!
; Anybody that suspects It, bely,'
No, love, everybody on the tlan
knows It and you needn't try any
longer to keep me from holding your
darling hand and putting my arm
around you!" =%
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
rina on credIt.

Cent have no change this mo.n
ing ri give you something On =,
return" 83$ fl Il M a. @ Y. ~,
Crossing Sweeper (sadiyl M
You'd be surprised II you knew - nJM
mech mohey I've lost BY giving c''s
that way!--London Opinion.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

compelled to go to work. the size OF
the pay envelope, the conditions un-
der which 1t worked. These and
i great mass Of other questions Will
be sought to be answered.
r. When all this data is complete It
will be tabulated. The tabulations, It
is hoped, will show how those who
were compelled to work and live un-
der detrimental conditions compared
with those who were born Of healthy
parents, and had every advantage.
both in school and otherwise. for the
start In life. n
One Of the reasons, 1t IL declared,
for not taking the investigations to
the larger cities was the lack OF ap-
preparations. In view Of this fact It
was pointed out that the large cities
have eficient means Of keeping very
complete mortality records. and for
that reason the children's bureau
probe should be confined to the small
er localities. % " I.
The results Of this investigation.
1t is believed. will furnish basis for
decided Improvement in the infant
mortality Of the country and will even
| result in bringing about better condi-
lions under which children work.
Confined to the smaller localities. It
probably will be the first information
| OF this kind which has ever been
compiled In such manner as !. to
show how the many children pull
through the trials and tribulations
through which some Of them IN their
young lives are compelled to pass. 4
OF course. the children's bureau IN
the advisory capacity in which It acts
cannot compel any change in condi-
lions which 1t may be shown IRE
needed. But It can make the investi-
cations and It can publish its ind.
ings. Then either congress. the state
legislatures or what II perhaps strong
or. II may move public sentiment,
which In turn will start other machin.
cry going and that will undoubtedly
result ii working the reforms which
are needed. IN.
But when the tell-tale Agurea .are
laid down In black and white showing
whether the child who has baen born
and lived under model conditions has
4 great and material advantage over
him who IL born and is reared under
adversely. It IL undoubted BY those
who have the welfare OF the little
ones at hsrd that any reforms which
may be shown to be needed will be
brought about. II "a.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

the power UU
hind the throne"
in the administra-
ton OF President
Woodrow Wilson
has been Q close
student Of poll
tics. both state
and national. for
more than 20
years. For near
ly that length Of
time he has been
the guiding star
OF the Democracy
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

Raleigh, the CAPT.
tai of North Caro-
lima. In fact, she
has spent practi.
cally all her life
in that city, and
W as 9 d u c q t e d
there. She is well
poised, and few
women have gone
to Washington bet
ter equipped for
exalted social du-
ties.
She has . sad.
h,,t diatinct inter.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
IS THE OFFICIAL CHAT ELAINE Of THE NAVY

terment of schools and to several pat
riotic societies. She takes great pride
in the work Of the Colonial Danes and
is an active member in the. philan-
thropic work connected with the
Daughters of the Confederacy, and she
is also a member of the Daughters Of
the American Revolution.
II feel very much at home in Wash
ington," said Mrs. Daniels i'm Washing
ton the other day, for have visited
here for many years, and then there
are SO many delightful North CAROLYN
ians part of the permanent population.
Few state societies have more potent
organization than the. North Carolina
society, and one OF the pleasant events
Of Inauguration week was the recep-
ton given our governor. Our state Is
altogether a most important one and
one which presents such interesting
phases. For instance, 1t is the only
state in the Union where every blank
relating to the production Of cereals is
filled out for the census taker and with
impressive figures. We raise every.
thing which comes under the heading
of farm stuffs, and we are climbing up-
ward as to the amount produced each
year" EH-@fra -st' sT,.- O. ..,.l0a, +:
Mrs. Daniels as wife of the secretary
of the navy will be the official 'chate'
laine OF the sea branch OF the national
defense. Navy people are somewhat
more numerous in Washington than the
army people, and this was shown when
the retiring secretary and Mrs. Meyer
gave a.reception as farewell courtesy
to these with whom they had been 80
long Identified. More than 500 guests
we're present. ~ ->Ee IA, ~ &
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Children are like animals, and they
must be trained in the same way.

A morse ooc-
trine, you think?
But that is be-
cause you were not
reared on a stock
farm, as l was,
and you do not
loye animals as I
do, Isay frankly at
the outset that l
have no children
Of my own. =. ! re-
greet that this Is
true. But ! have
always been ex.
ceedingly fond Of
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Plaxwrlahts Miss Chance.

9T..s1G1 3PJAyWrIUHSv WVsS 1'!sus 1'SS' 1E x
II Is curious that In none Of the
patriotic plays now running IN Paris,
all revolving on theme OF. the lost
provinces, Is there any representation
OF life at La Schlucht. sss
n. Ito chief feature y it, apparently
cultivated resemblance to what might
be stage imitation Of itself.
Here France and Germany meet IN
the middle Of the main street. and as
the boundary line follows slanting
course It Ii possible for, say, . Ger
mar and 1 French soldier 70 Stand
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Right Path 81 lie

TO become good workman in any
department OF life. preparation and
training are necessary. To know how
IL 4 great advantage almost half the
battle. But Ii all our getting and
training. let us not fail TO learn how
to liye-make life that shall By
praise to God and q blessing to our
fellow-men. TO do that is 10 show
forth true wisdom. How 70 do II 10
the question. The problem - solved
when We take Christ's yoke upon US
ana learn OF him. 70 follow him - 70
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
Quick Recovery

"Cold in the head, Ell! Now i can
tell YOU" Sorry, old chap, but
I'm not going to try your cure
"That is q miserable thing to have
I've Just got over one myself."De-
troit Free Press NJ. 5s.ss
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
70 BE Avoided.

Briggs Bilkins is going to join ,ur
poker club. ss
Griggs Bilkins! Why, he Is a dea-
con in the church. Il
Briggs That SO! I'm glad you
warned me. Smart Set. Il 1, ~;
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
SENSE OF HUMoR.

1T is a sure sign that as nation
we are endowed with a sense OF
humor," remarked congressman on
the Capitol plaza a few days ago,
when any one OF us will give up five
minutes of a busy day to stand right
here on this tornado-swept stretch
and laugh heartily at some poor tour
list who has to run half mile after
his hat which invariably blows Of
as he goes around the Capitol cor
ner." 5a@ SEss%5 &Ts,tfES& iTI$ III
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
a1rua Moaning " &C esIon.',

True M0a0iN0 q ton."
,Etymologically ! lesion means u IA.
Jury Of any kind that destroys or de-
ranges the normal operations ard func-
lions Of the human body. Technically.
x lesion IL defined q any structural
perversion which BY preaeure Or irri-'
tation produces Or maintain func-
tional perversion.. That ~ simply Z
professional way Of defining any In
.inry 10 the machinery 81 the body that
nay come from internal deransament
81 from external causes. such AZ 2
vfail, !, blow, strain, shot, y Rfsb,
ehanses OF Temperature. etc.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

man who could face the most terrify.
ing perils Of bombardment and siege
end starvation, and yet concede no
quarter to friends Ok 70 foes.
n shhkri Pasa Ill regarded by many 90
one Of the greatest and sturdiest mill.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09
More Laws.

Beg pardon" said the conductor,
but you can't smoke cigarettes on q
train In Indiana" RI
+ The passenger threw away his
smoke. l5s.,Etsf NH
And ! wish you'd tell your wife
that she'll have to change that peek
aboo waist as soon as we cross the
line into Ohio It's against the law
to wear 'em In that state" 4.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1913-05-09

Pasha. Through
al the rout and
squalid lack Of or
Isl nizat Il Q n !.
through Ell the
amazing round of
.reverses and Ill
conceived strata
gem which attend
ed the conduct OF
the Turkish troops
In the field, the e,
defender Of Adria-
nople stands out
4 the one redeem
1nU figure -.., the