davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Naughty Judge,

NTHEY say our new magistrate
L INDUCES In mixed metaphors"
said lady to a friend.
Dreadful" exclaimed the other.
my husband says it's much better
to keep to one liquor"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
How interesting!

UO1 WIS that son o yourn wot
~ went into the army gettin'
on, Mr.. 'Opkins?"
ooh, dom splendid They've made
i'm a color-sergeant now"
"'Ave they, though? What color?"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Two Sorts of Operations.

at SEE they have operated on
L Philadelphia boys head In or
der to make a better boy Of him"
THAT isn't where my dad used TO
operate on me TO make better boy
of me"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
New Ones From Everywhere Told by the Jokesmiths

explained that his father was ex-
tremely proud of that skeleton.
is he?" asked the other WHY"
Il don't know" was the answer;
maybe it was his first patient"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
A Small Dog.

aT HAVEN'T anything to do" complained choIly.
"a feIlah gets tired Of just twIrng his cane
don't you know"
"of course" ssoented AIsy. "Why don't you get
dog to lead, old ehapH
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
And He Does 1t.

UNINkLE says he doesn't know what to do with
himself when his wIfe's out Of town."
SPIN not surprised. However, he knows what TO
do with himself when she's In town, because she
tells him."
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Some PLAYER, Too.

GETHERE nine side In a baseball
game aren't there7" asked the from
sbroad.
mo-" replied Miss Cayenne "Tsn. The umpire
shifts"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

have seen that l was smiling?"
WELL" he replied, magnanimously,
your mouth is so small, l didn't
notice it."
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Not a Chance.

TUDGE-The prisoner claims that he footed his
horn before he over you.
Complainant (muoh damaged)-Maybe he did,
your honor; but what good lie that when car 10
travelling faster than soundf
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
In Times of Trial

SSERANY criminals desperate after they
AVA have served a number Of terms In prison."
remarked the new member of the club.
"Yes; they must be possessed of courage born
OF convictions" agreed the man who knows.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Copyright, 1913. by the
Yet, Not Again.

A RING at the telephone drew the office boy.
n LADY to talk to you sir" he saId to the senior
partner
The senior partner took up the receiver and stood
at the phone for several minutes. Then he laid
the receiver down, and went back to ho DESK TWen-
ty minutes later he raised the receiver, said few
words and presently hung up. Then he turned to
his partner
"is was my wife," no explained. "she was still
TALKING and hadn't missed mo-"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Juvenile Faith.

AKoTHER entered the room just In time to see four
AVA yearoId Verna knock her older brother down.
"Verna, how could you do such thns!"
"rhs Lord gave me strength" Verna proudly re.
piled.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Declared a Strike.

SCTHEY say that unions raise tho price Of labor"
"ouIte right! Two Of my clerks got married
last week and struck me for more salary"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Does All She Can.

EGDAPA, mamma says that ons-hah the world
doesn't know how the other half lives"
"WeIl, she shouldn't blame herself, dear. II isn't
her fault"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

bite. The latter, however, did pretty
we'll; so well. indeed, that the
gamblers were puzzled. On one hand
there was a bet 80. This the ten
derfoot promptly raised S12.
I'm Just lift that $780," announced
one of the gamblers.
To the establishment of all, the
tenderfoot saw the raise.
What have you got, any way?"
demanded the gambler testify
"A pair of kings" said the Bos-
tonian, laying them down.
BILL said the gambler, turning
to friend, tell him they're good
| can't"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Good Laughs from Here and There
Didn't Sound Good.
Great Britain Rights Reserved.

Didn't Sound Good.
FRIENDLY CONSTRUCTIONS, como, sir, pull
yourself together; there's your wife calling you
Festive Gent-Wha' she eaI-he-eans me-
Billy or WIlIamH
Constable-WlIIIam, SIR
Festive Gent-Then I'm not goln-hlo-'ome
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

WImmIn will doubt q honest
man and believe every word a
ten-eent fortune teller tells her
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

The "Unesrtin" age In woman ls
emmy time before she's married,
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

~ G man took no more lntrIst
lR hIs meals thar hIz wife takes In
htz blxnIss, she'd bs broken.
hearted.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
Ole Uncle
Crusty Says:

Crusty Says:
Copyrights. 1918, By TIE star Company.
Great Britain Rights Reserved
A WoMAN's tune 10 her sword,
~ but she hex lost IN sosb.
d. ID bard.
Tn arttHshui he w~waR's fret
law Of ssIf-prsssrvashun.
Many a family skeleton looks
plump on Tn street
Nine out or ten old maids was
rousish eokettes years ago.
The woman vino uses peroxide
can't deny che has q ysller streak.
Talk lie ehseP an woman loves
or bargain
elttln' Tilted 10 like puIIIn' or
teeth---lt hurts at th' time, but
think how much better of you are.
Many a dImund 10 or sIIppIn'
stone to nnRtrameRy.
~ G man took no more lntrIst
In his meals thar hlz wife takes In
htx blrnIss, she'd hs broken.
hearted.
The "Unesrtin" age In woman Is
emmy time before she's married,
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09
SQUARED It.

&c LILY boy!" she said, why did
~ you become offended? Though
my words were severe. you might
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

elttln' Tilted 10 like puIIIn' or
teeth---lt hurts at th' time, but
think how much better of you are.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

Nine out or ten old maids was
rousish eokettes years ago.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

Many a dlnund 10 or slIppIn'
stone to nstrsmeRy.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

Many a family skeleton looks
plump on Tn street
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

Tn artiHshui ls w@Faaa's frat
law Of ssIf-prsssrVashun-
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

Talk lie ohsep en- woman loves
or bargain
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

The woman VINO uses peroxide
can't deny che has a yaIier streak.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1913-11-09

A WoMAN's tuna 10 her sword,
~ but she hex lost en- sosb-
@ ~ bard
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
BASKERVILLE K0RLRAsS
RECITAL PROVES TREAT
CONCERT or HIGH ORDER is EN-
JoYED a CALUMET LIGHT
GUARD ARMORY,

The baskerville Eohihals piano and
song recital a, tf. calumet Lishl
Guard uuory a.l r.-nas ,oe %
musical treat of high order and Mrs
Baskerville. pianist. and Mrs Kohl
has, soprano. shared equally in The
appreciation OF tine large audieaae.
a.rs. Alice Nelson Ki1e sao r.aycf
for Mrs Kohlhous' souss was au a7lo
accompanies
Georgia Richardson Baskerville
playing Is OF q character that easily
places her among the leading pIauIsts
ct the country II is to 6e doubted
whether her equal has ever been heard
in Calumet. II Is not essential Tor ono
10 be educated ip the iutricacics OF
music 10 thoroughly cuJoy her splcu-
did execution Of the most aimculJ 81
tho classics of the great masters, such
So List, Mcndcissohu. Rubmstem and
Strauss, tor she plays with intense
feeling, briluaucy and perfect inter-
Uretauou. ~ the opening piece. Ara
boslua lou the themes OF tho Blue
Uauu1oj Dol. s,rauss- schulz Erlrr.
Airs Baskerville gave q fascAatIu-
display OF harmony and artist.,a'
shadiuL. Her rendition OF group OF
i5ur selections IN the third uumbec
Staco5to Etude bv Rubjns,c.p Poem
rv ruhote SPINNING Sovr Dose Non
.f.tga,I,,. md Oh. r-rI I'm. De- ...t,+,
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
LOCAL sREvlrlEs

Mrs. stephen Tobin and MIRA. Edwin
Craze will leave this afternoon for
Kalamazoo. where they viii represent
Elizabeth Eebekah lodge At the state
Rebeltah Assembly
Mr.. and Mrs. Fabian Ycndow OF
Phoenix have gone 10 LaSalle, H.
where they expect TO spend the winter
with their daughter, Mrs. {. &. swift.
William Trcverrow and John wills.
who were working for the Mary Char
.lottc mine at Ncgaunec since the be-
ginning OF the strike, have arrived
home having been laid of with about
500 other men curing the past week,
August Collier who has been en-
ployed by the keweenaw Central road
for the past several years, has gone
to Winuipcg. where he likely will To-
cate
Rev. t,r. Alban Schneider of Mohawk
has gone To Cincinnati, where he viii
spend several weeks.
Lutheran churches in this section
are making ARRANGEMENTS to observe
the birthday anniversary of carl r. w.
Walthcr II. d., founder Of the synodi-
cal conference who was born oct, 20,
ISL
Mrs MARY Edwards has returned
from non country points. where she
has been visiting.
Mrs. Il. J. Williams and family will
leave this evening for Detroit where
they viii make their residence.
Emil uaampaa has arrived home
after an extended visit to Finland.
j. {. Hansen and John c. Vivian
have arrived home from a successful
hunting trip to the otter Lake dis
trict. James Virgins is home from
hunting trip 10 Aston
Miss Carrie Carkcet has arrived
home from visit 10 Detroit, Chicago
and othcr cities.
Mrs. Mary Costa and family of Os-
ceola have left for Butte. Mont. where
they viii make their future home
Mrs. Joseph Conetto and family Of
Osceola have gone 10 Butte 10 Join
Mr.. Conetto, who went 20 that city
at the beginning OF the strike.
T. 7. Benefits and \. + Whiteman
NJ Eagle HarbOr both in the light.
house service were the guests Of Calu-
met friends today.
+. II. Banker OF Chicago. represent.
Ing the S. q II. Trading stamp COM
pany, is a business visitor here.
G. A. BlodGott of Mandan was the
guest of Calumet friends yesterday
and today.
J G. Kennedy, local representative
"f the :. x II. Green Trading Stamp
company is in lshpcmiug on business
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
MANY SEEKING
APPOINTMENTS
Democratic Postmasters Likely
After Next Summer

Although the terms of the present
incumbcnts, Charles !. Wickstrom ana
Vincent Nairo. De- not expire until
about the middle of next summer, there
are already several Democratic aspl-
rants in the field TOR the appointments
as postmaster IN Calumet aud Ldurium
Respectively This is especially true OF
L.aurium where there are three candi-
dates in the field
In Calumet the petition OF John Il.
RYAN was circulated and quit" freely
signed short time ago and as far as
is known there arr no other candi-
dates in the field. In LaWrium tranH
pist,i has already circulated his pc
ut,u for the appointment and II Is
in understood that VIII J. McCormicN
rs I'm receptive mood, although n"ith-
er OF the latter have circulated pc
titons.
In view OF the fact the democratic
are somewhat divided among them
selves over tn" appointments, the
Original Wilson" Democrats opposing
the selections mad" 10y the state or
gluiaauou. there is much speculation
as 20 ;hc outcome. 80 far the copper
country appointment Dan Holland
for the Hancock office. Emmett Foley
for the Mohawk office and Louis j.
Braun for the South Range oIfic" afi'
al Original Wilson men, while in
many other parts Of tn state IN" Sc.
icctiony of tho state organizations have
been favored over those OF the orig
inal Wilson faction.
Il - generally thought locally that
the administration viii seek 10 pro-
mote harmony between the factions
by dividing the patronage.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
DELEGATES OFF TODAY,
Representatives OF Odd Fellows and
Rebekah State Meetinas.

Copper country representatives to
the state meetings of the Odd Fellows
and Bebekahs at Kalamazoo during
the coming week. departed this after.
noon Following Is a list Of the dele
gates:
Kewoenaw lodge, AllouCz--Johu
LAYERS and Frank Urcn
Lake Linden lodge-Charlcs LcSasy
and Edward BENEFITS.
Mystic lodge, Hancock-T. j. Gres
DRY and W. Frank Williams.
Hecla lodge-William IL. Benefits
Edwin Northy went to Kalamazoo ear
licr in the week as a Hecla lodge dele
gate.
Calumet iodge--John Caldwell ami
Andrew Nichols.
Ivy Rebekah lodge, Lake Linden
Mrs. Thomas Burgan.
Stella Rebekah lodge, Calumet
Mary McLennau.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
BACK FROM ISLE RoYALE,
Capt. Wesley Clarke Completes Annual
Inspection OF Island,

Isle Royale is ready Tor the winter,
according 10 Capt Wesley Clarke. SUI
pervisor of Eagle Harhor township,
who has arrived home from on inspec-
ton Of the island. which is part of
his township, Most Of the summer Wis
TORS At the leland have left for the
mainland
Mr.. Clarke made the trip from Du-
luth "a Tobin's Harhor Via the Booth
huc steamer America. lie says the day
the boat arrived at Tobin's Harbor was
an ideal one, with the sea as calm as
shoe, Of glass. Tho shore line which
is friugcd with Mountain Ash trees
with their dark green foliage ana rcd
berries aul the background of oaks
and mapics with their autumn tints.
presented picture of scenic grandeur
that has ~ equal in the world, Capt
Clarke suNs.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
REDS AND BLUES
AFTER MEMBERS
Annual Campaign Of the Calumet
Y.M. C. A. Started

Members of the Calumet Y. M. G. A.
today launched an energetic ten-day
campaien fer new members. Following
a rally of the younger boys and inter.
modldtos IN the association buillmg
last r.cning at which the mystorious
letters. "B. NJ. g." were Interpreted To-
mean. Boys Membership Campaign"
details Of the plan were worked out by
tho boys who chose their leaders To-
GAY the campaign started IN earnest
II involves the adult members of the
association as wen as the younger
members and if the interest taken is
any criterion, the campaign will bc
highly successful,
An uf the members Of the associa-
ton have been divided into two Sides
the Reds" and the blues" ]. Garnet
Odgers has been named as captain o"
tho Blues" and r. h. Odgers viii
load the Red forces. Syrus Crair
Blues" to direct the work of the IN
tcrmCdt3iCN ana ltfll IisktN VIII De-
second lieutenant of the Blues" lead
ing the younger boy section. Henr
Morrison a. Grst lieutenant will d
rect the campaign Of the intermediat
section Of the Red" army and Mur-
cock Mathcwson will be second lieu
tenant 20 lead The younger boys OF the
Rcd" force.
The Younger members OF the asso.
citation have set 200 as their goal They
viii make desperate efforts to add that
many new members to the association
books and even 10 go over that mark
Points win be scored according TO tho
lass OF membership--fo instance two
points Tor membership in the asso-
citation. two points for membership ~
the physical department, etc. The
POINTS are awarded on basis of about
one point for every dollar of the mem.
bcrship fee.
The contest will close wednesday,
night oct. 20 aud Immediately after
there viii be- turkey dinner at which
the losing side viii wait on the table
ior the winners. and will eat beans.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18

BY majority Of two, the Detroit
Federation # Labor Thursday night
was put IN the position Of protesting
against the enactment of the ordin-
.aHcc TO protect girls from downfall by
prohibiting the sale OF drink In dance
halls, says the Detroit Journal Violent
protest against this action is being
heard among members of the labor or
ganizatiOn generally.
The vote IN the aldermanic body
Tuesday night was a sign Of the times.
and it is indeed encouraging to find
oar city aldermen, who are usually tied
TO so many strings Of obligation. vot-
ing law % help general admiuistra-
lion decently control our city" said
Antonio Enten2a, legal representative
II the labor unions. Thursday morn
ug
You cannot regulate places Of that
nature when the selling of liquor is al
lowed II prevents people from respect
ing the law as well as themselves
The majority Of the mothers and
fathers, who have children that fire.
$4,000 iAN VIZ 'At'li'' licill"f WY llhFlN
know noting Of the great temptation
confronting their children. The best
tast of the general inCecency OF the
ounce hall is the fact that the hus-
land refuses 10 take his wife daughter
Cd sister 30 indulge ia the amusement.
The dance halls where they use
liquor as side line Is "a producer Of
g. looscncss of morals, and cannot be
considered be- the least clevating
The great trouble with the passage
# an ordinance of this kind is that
10 certain interest Immediately begins
90 think that the next move will be
IN the entire obliteration Of liquor
from the race Of the globe, when If
the fact were known, il puts their
traffic I'm a position OF regulation
where the law maker can really con-
tiuue il indefinitely without harm to
The people
The dance hall, that does not mean
the dance, but the dance hall with its
side shows has been the shame of
every city"
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
INCREASE IN EARNINGS
OF THE SOUTH SHORE
Railroad Makes Better Showing De-
spite The Strlke.

lu face OBJ tho strike iu tho copper
couutry ,bo, has boon on since july,
earnings Of tho Duluth south Shore q
Atlantic raIwa, arc showing increases,
says Tho Duluth Herald That result
rs attributed Jy officials 'o tho STEADY
development ~ agricultural districts
bs the road
1t is expected that the extensive pro-
gram If improvements begun In May
1912. viii DO, completed this year. The
uulayorabi. -howiugs ~ net earnings
..-.Ds has. been attributable 20 eN-
pruIj,urcs IN this work having been
maGr n rh3rgp against CURRENT reve-
gHs.
The South Sboros -ro,. earnings
TOR AUGUST were reported a. {35L7S8.
as compared with S812.ss1 for the
same monta last year. It's net revenue
uas SNG2i5, or $1,000 better than "A
..sfr ago.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
ARRIVALS OF The sToRk.

Births recently reported IN Colamc,
townships are daughters 20 Mr.. and
Mrs. Mark W.. Pascc" OF iron Rive,
Mr.. ana Mrs. lgnata Klicnowsk Of
2O0l Calumet avenue, Mr. and Alrs.
Nicholas Mark of 3l01 Ski street and
Mr. and Mrs Morley Barues OF 1870
Laurium street
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
REVIEWS OLD FRIENDSHIPS.

Mrs. Porter Hitchcock of Pontiac,
daughter Of the late Daniel S. Cash,
whose family came to Ontonagon on
the old Julia Palmer In ts47 from
Cleveland, is visiting at the home of
Mrs. Emma Shepard Of Willow ave-
nue.. This Is her first visit to the cop
per country for nineteen years. The
first election in Ontonagon county was
held at the home of Mrs. Hitchcoct' s
father
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18

letter advantage than in her variety cl
songs last evening.
In her first number May the Maid.
on. Ev Carpenter. and Polomaisc from
Niguou. by Thomas. Mrs Kohlhaas'~
singing was delightful melody Of tone
go'orinre under remarkable control
Especially was this tru, II the second
soue which required much artjsticat
shading IN her concluding number, d
group Of five souEs-Rose Dreamed
~he Was a Lily. Japanese Maiden.
Spirit Flower, L'Hcure ENquise, and
Tho Gu, az Rachael Mrs Eohlhaas
gfv, evidence ~ the versatility Of her
singing, passing readily from the light
and airy 20 the selections requiring
greater rams. and volume. She was
a., her best I'm all Of these songs. hut
.n none Gld her splendid vocal eudow.
maut Show ro lcttcy adynutJS. than iu
spirit Flower and -~lt Cu of Rs
.ha-l" Hey yo.c, is a sweet, clear 500
uraua of exquisite tone qualities and
requisite rsu-e ana volume.
The concert. which delighted tire au-
di,ue-, was followed by dancing until
q late hour the Calumet * Hecls or
chestva furnishing tbe music
The recital Was given under Tie du-
spices Of tho Calumet Park ana Play
ground association. an Organization in
.uutcj 10y tho Calumet Wom7us club.
This association is accomplishing real
things in the way Of providing pleasure
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
HOME foRrNlenILy cLue.

Members of tho Home Fortnightly
Club are looking forward With interest
to the issuance next week of the an.
nual program, which promises to prove
- very Interesting one. Meetings are
held every two weeks in the homes of
the members.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1913-10-18
MISSIONARY SOCIETY.

The Womons Home Missionary So
cIety II the Calumet NJ. T.. church will
rarve chicken Pie dinner in the par
jcrs Of the church on Friday evening,
oct q. The dinners by this society
are somewhat famous, and it is eX.
pucted this one viii be no exception