davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Easier and PIeasanter.

Talking of ladies' shortcomings re-
calls a story recently heard of a large
and determined-looking woman who
wore a very large hat one evening at
the theater.
Madam said the attendant polite
ly, 81 must request you to remove
your hat 1t is annoying this gentle
man behind you"
The massive lady turned and
haughtily surveyed the complainant.
do you mean that little weedy. un'
dersized creature?" she asked.
"This gentleman behind you," the
attendant corrected her.
The lady settled herself in her
place.
You will find it easier and pleas
anter," she said decisively, ito re-
move him!"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Eaqer for His Rights.

AS little Freddie had reached the ma
ture age of three, and was about to
discard petticoats for manly raiment
in the form of knickerbockers, his
mother determined TO make the occa-
sion a memorable one. The Bristol
Times tells what happened.
The breakfast table was laden
with good fare as the newly-breeched
infant was led into the room. "Ah-"
cried the proud mother, now you are
a little mani"
The fledgling was in ecstasies. Dis
playing his garments to their full ad-
vantage, he edged closer to his moth
er, and whispered, "Mummie, can l
call pa Bill now ::"-Youth's Compan-
ion
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Both Hands Free.

At the suffrage lunchrooms in
New York a woman electrician the
other day showed Mrs. o. H. P. Bel
mont model OF a cradle that rocks
by electricity.
Mrs. Belmont, after examining the
model with interest, smiled and said:
This invention is of great value to
woman-it leaves both her hands free
for the carrying of suffrage banners
and the distribution of suffrage litera'
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Siiencer.

DR.. Henry Van Dyke, the distin-
guished clergyman, has a neat way
of silencing the censorious.
At luncheon in Princeton GER
tain bishop was being discussed, and
a visitor said:
ct don't like the bishop. He is too
much a man of the world to suit me"
quite So" Or. Van Dyke retorted
quickly; "but which world, this or the
neXt?"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Wanted Slaves for Missouri.

On January 81, 177S, Don Bernardo
de Galvez, governor Of the Spanish
province of Louisiana, which included
Missouri, petitioned the king of Spain
for aid for the settlers along the Mis-
souri, river and Mississippi river in
Missouri THE said inhabitants" he
wrote" in order to promote the cul
tune of these plants (flax and hemp
would desire that the compassion OF
the king should deign to provide them
with negro slaves on credit, for whom
they may pay with the crops afore
said"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Looking After His Bait.

Daniel and Harvey, two old, expert
fishermen, were still fishing for
trout in deep water, sitting with their
backs together, when Daniel acct
dentally fell out of the boat and went
down. Harvey looked back and miss
ed his companion, who at that mo-
ment appeared on the surface, pipe
still in his mouth, shaking his whis-
kers profusely.
Harvey-Gosh,. Dan! 1 jest missed
ye! Where we been?
Dan-Oh, l jes' went down for ter
see if me bait wus all right.-Judge.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Beans in His Head.

Two beans, one of which had
sprouted into an embryo plant, were
removed from the head of a Mexican
laboref at San Bernardino, Cal, by a
physician. For months the man had
&C lained of severe pains. The
beans had entered his head through
his left ear. The growing plant was
nearly an inch long and apparently
had fiourished in the ear tube.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Rose to the Occasion

hose 10 Ute OCCdSIOHs
Where did you get those lovely
roses, dear?'
Aren't they beautiful"
"Yes-where did you get them?"
Robert Bosqueau gave them to
me-"
"Bobbie Bosqueau? Why"
Eyes, I know what you are going
to say. His wife has been dead only
six weeks, and isn't it pathetic that
he Is bringing me roses?"
"Yes-haven't they kept WE'LL"
And the breeze blew, and the rain
drops fell, and it wasn't for quite a
while that the fierce enmity started
Exchange.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Rather Hot Shot for Doctor.

This incident is related of Scotch
doctor, new to the gun, who adven
tured upon a days rabbit-shooting.
Chased by the ferrets, bunny was z
rather quick-moving target, and the
medico was not meeting with the suo
cess he anticipated.
Hang it all, mani" he exclaimed,
impatiently, to the keeper who accom-
panied him, these beasts are too
quick for me-"
AYE, DOCTOR" the pawky keeper re-
piled; "but We surely didna expect
them tae lie still like yer patients till
We kill them"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Leoacv to Have His Health Drunk.

Legacy 70 FIdVe TITS TTeaTtrT II uTTk'
MIR. John Dipple of Leytonstone, IL
censed victualler who died on Sep
TENDER 81, bequeathed $3.50 to the
treasurer of the Leyspring lodge OF
Free Masons upon trust to apply the
income in providing for a silent toast
to be drunk to his memory, to be pro
posed at the installation banquet OF
the lodge by the master.-London
Times.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Love Can Make All Right,

Think on thy wants, on thy faults.
Recollect all the patience, all the kind
ness, all the tenderness, which has
been shown thee. Think also on life
how short it is, how much unavoid-
able bitterness it possesses; how
much which it is easy either to bear
or chase away; and think how the
power of affection can mike all things
right-Punshon.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

sas station 500 pounds of pork was
made from one ton of alfalfa hay" In
other words, two and half pounds of
alfalfa hay produced a pound of pork.
Everybody knows that such state.
ment is ridiculous; but it is no worse
than some other claims maids for al
falfa
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Still Untasted.

What" asked Mrs. Oldcastle as she
picked up volume of Limp Feather
Edition of the Classics, do you think
of Thucydides?"
81 really don't know" replied Mrs.
Gottalotte, after she had Strengthened
a corner OF her $500 royal Persian
rug; we've never had any. Josiah
says they're no good unless you get
them fresh, and our grocer never
seems to have any except the ones in
cans"-Exchange
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Adopted Standard Carat.

The International carat which has
been adopted in this country, to be
effective July 1 next, is 200 milligram-
mes, or one-fifth of a gramme (3.0S6
grains), and is now in use in France,
Germany and practically all countries
except the United States, Great Bril-
tain, Belgium and Holland. 3
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
In the Midst of Luxury.

"You have everything that wealth
can buy, haven't you?"
Eyes" replied Mr.. Dustin Stax. But
it don't seem fair that l should have
worked 80 hard to get all these things
while the butler and footmen and
maids enjoy them free"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The chapter In
which this text is
found sets forth
the detailed ar
rangements of the
Passover. 1t Is as
sumed that the
children, observ-
ing this prepare
ton, would ask
their pare n t 8
what was meant
by it. In answer
ing the children
the parents were
thus afforded a
good opportunity
of stating to the
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Limited KNOWLEDGE.

A Muncie bride of two months went
into a department store of the city
to buy four pairs of socks for her hus-
band.
What size. please?" asked the
young woman clerk.
well, all ] know is he wears a IA
collar" replied the bride.-Indianap
oils News
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Shoots First.

THAT guide shoots nearly every
hunter he takes out.
Accidentally?
mo, he always claims he does 1t
in self-defense."
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Inherited.

"Was there ever an informer in
your family?"
What do you mean by such ques-
ton as that, sir?"
81 noticed that your baby is in
elined. to be a squealer."
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
His Status

THAT man is something more than
a mere marine"
DO you mean he is an ultrama,
rine?"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The greatest amount of good is per-
formed by neighbors every day. If
the little help afforded every day
could be known, and represented in
bulk sum, it would amount to millions.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Every mother dreams that her son
NAV be president some day, but she
would be awfully surprised if her
dream were to come true.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The man who refuses to see the
error OF his way has just that much
further to travel back.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
PessimiSm,

Willie-Paw, what is a pessimist?
Paw-A man who takes an umbrel-
Ia along when he goes to a ball game
Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Doubtful.

Have you q good cook now?"
81 don't know. haven't been home
since ast!"-London Opinion.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Don't you want Miss Freezem to
lend eclat to your Junction."
No; we're not borrowing trouble.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
This Is unkind.

Tommy--Pop. what is free
thinker?
Pop-A freethinker, my son, is any
man who isn't Observation-Disclosures
Record.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Good Breeding Points.

In buying a brood mare, keep in
mind that size, form and constitution
are important breeding pointa
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces iniamma.
tion all avs pain. wind collie, 25c bottleldE
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The man with patches on the seat of
his trousers isn't so apt to borrow
money as the well-d:esscd nan who
owes his tailor.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The easiest thing in the world to
do is to make up your mind what you
would do if you were in some other
fellows place.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

A married man has reached the bot
tom of the ladder when he begins to
brag about his wife's relations.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Name the Line,

Hubbubs-Have you any late trains
to Lonelyville?
Subbubs-Yes All our trains are
late.-Stray Stories.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Humility.

There's nothing so becomes a man
as modest stiffness and humility
Shakespeare.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

1t takes sharp man to make tool
of dull one.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The microbe of love is sometimes
devoured by the germ of suspicion.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
DoEs worm HEAD acHCs

Try Hicks CAPUDINE. It's liquid-pleas-
ant to take-effects immediate-good to prevent
Sick Headaches and Nervous Headaches also.
Your money back if not satisfied. 10c., Csc. and
Soc, at medicine stores Adv.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
For SIMMER HEADACHES

Hicks CAPUDINE is the best remedy
no matter what causes them-whether
from the heat, sitting in draughts, fever
isl. condition. etc. 10c., CSC and 50c per
bottle at medicine stores. Adv.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Many girl who wouldn't make a
coed wife for poor man would make
poor wife for rich man.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Much of that which is called pure
cussedness'' is nothing but human
nature.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

ITCH Relieved in 80 Minutes.
woolford's Sanitary Lotion for all kinds OF
contagious itch. At Druggists. Adv.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Its Kind.

Darling, l worship you
Now, dearest, that's idol talk
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Fewer flowers for the dead and
more for the living would help some.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

"Health's best way-Eat Apples ev-
cry day.'-Coyne.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The sting of defeat outlasts the
sweets of victory.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Quite Natural

- What was your experience when
the train was telescoped?"
81 saw stars"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

important to fsothers
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORIA, safe and sure remedy for
infants ard children, and see that it
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
~ DAsA' Nm RI1IT n III TIE SYSTEM

Take the Old Standard GROVES TASTELESS
CHILL TONIC. You know what you are taking.
The formula is plainly printed on every bottle.
showing 1t Is simply Qunne and Iron In q tasteless
people ana children 30 cents. Adv.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

- nbnbeV TREATED. Give quick re-
Al WHIT u lief, usually remove swell
U 81 ling and short breath In a few days and
entire relief in 1915 days, trial treatment
FREE DR.. GREENS SONS, Box A. Atlanta, Ga.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
Backache Makes Anyone Fee

The following case is ty
effected by Doan's Kidnea
testimony is the best evid'
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

One Of the qualities of the soy bean
that commends it to the stock feeder
is it's protein richness.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10
MOTHER GRAY'S SWEET
POWDERS FOR CHILDREN

Relieve Feverishness, Constipa-
ton, Colds and correct disorders of
the stomach and bowels. Used by
Mothers for % gears. AT all Drug
gists 25c. Sample mailed FREE.
Address a. s. oimssed, Le Roy, n. Z.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Much of the feeding value of the
clover depends upon how the crop is
managed after it is cut.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Five feet apart is about the right
distance for the currant and goose
berry bushes. Do not crowd.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Careful dressing of fowls for the
market has good deal to do in get
ting top notch prices.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Make lime water by adding two or
three pounds of lime to barrel of
water
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Breeding stock can be purchased to
better advantage in fall and early
winter than to wait until spring.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The possibilities in the poultry bust
ness are almost unlimited: The city
man or woman may start little back
yard poultry plant and gradually de-
Some of our biggest poultry raisers of
today have started that way and they
are, as rule, the most successful men
and women in the business. They
have grown up with It and have learn
ed every detail connected with the
same. Some of them have had set
back - -hpv stuck to Il
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

A hog fed on corn alone from the
time it is weaned from the sow I'M
til butchered at 10 months old, seldom
pays for his keep.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

1t pays to whitewash, ventilate and
properly light the stables; to brush
and curry cows; to use clean and
well-coyered - utensils, to cool milk
quickly and to have cool place for
the milk
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Experiment has shown that oats are
not a satisfactory feed for fattening
hogs.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Penning chickens is the best way
to get fine flock, for it means that
you are getting eggs from the best
hens you have.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Where hens are forced. to use part
of their food as fuel to keep warm
there is bound to be falling of in
eggs.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The value of farm land can only be
arrived at by its earning: apacity If
it is worth any price it will pay good
interest on the investment in the reg
ular farming process. We can add to
it's value by adding to it's capacity to
grow things and grow them a little
better than any other farm in the
ueighborhood
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The best stock pea for grazing in
the field is the black. Everlasting,
Red and Red Ripper are also good.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

1t is poor economy to feed spoiled
food to the poultry. They may con-
tract disease or become poisoned.
Burn all decomposed food stuff at
once
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The day has forever passed when
the progressive dairyman allows his
cows to be brought, running or ex-
cited, into the barn, by dog or boy
with a whip.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Sheep in the summer are gross
feeders, rapidly cleaning the land of
brush and weeds, but in the barn and
in the feed lot they are extremely
dainty in their eating.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

II the hens are stacking up in lay
ing try giving them little green cut
bone every day and watch results.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The cows like the silage in the win
ter just as we'll as they do the grass
in the summer and it is good at any
season of the year.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Hens, when they cease laying, fat
ten very ,e6siiy and a fat hen is a
thrifty candidate for all kinds of poul-
try diseases.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The farmer who makes an effort to
fill the corn crib and smokehouse
each year generally succeeds.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

Stout, livable chicks are obtained
only from sturdy parents, and pullets
that have been forced for winter eggs
are hardly in that class.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1913-01-10

The farmer who is not raising le-
gumes has his eyes closed to some OF
the biggest opportunities in farming.
The Pensacola journal., 1913-02-23

borrowed from the teacher under
whom she studied dancing. The petite
artistic was born in Vienna, but was
brought to New York when a baby.
She made her first stage appearance
with the German company at the
Irving Place theatre when only four
years old, playing the role Of one of
the dwarfs in q production of Snow
White and the Seven Dwarfs." She
continued playing child roles with the
German companies right up until
within a few months ago.
College men throughout the country
will be interested to know that Thomas
Achelis II, who became widely known
for his skill as an amateur actor dur
ing his years at Yale university, is
making his professional debut in the
Shubert production of Romance at
Maxine Elliott's theatre. Mr. Achelis,
who is a member of a noted New York
family, was president of the Yale ORA
ruatio Association in 1908, when the
college boys presented Ibsen's THE
Pretender' at the Waldorf Astoria
In way. Mr.. Achelis may be said to
be making a double debut" for he is
playing two minor roles of widely con-
trasting characters.
The tendency of college men and
college bred women to enter the the
atrical profession as players, which is