Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-07-13


circulated be tn predatory INTERESTS
that he takes vanilla Ice cream in his
sody wather. TIL Prisidint does not
aven drink sody wather, EXCEPT on a
druggists prescription. His fav'rite
bivrage is skinned milk TIL sinit
hayin' closed tn Sinit bar as sinful
has abolished tn Turkish bath as on
necessary 'Willum Jennings Bryan
on his return to wash'nton rr q days
rest firm his arjoos jooties invited tn
foreign ambassadures to att1nd q din
ner an announced that he wud give
thin on'y tn pure an onferminted
Juice iv tn grape to dhrink-
18th ambassadures held hurr1d
meetin' an cabled to their home gov
ermints fr instructions. They were
ordhered to attind in tn inthrests Nv
peace, but tn Fr-rinch ambassadure
resigned. At tn dinner tn sicrety Nv
State toasted peace in a dipper Nv tn
toothsome suds. In attimptin' to drink
tn toast tn English ambassadure was
attacked with vilent coughin' spell
an was enable to respond, but was un-
dhersthud to say that there was worse
ways Nv dyin' thin on tn field Nv bat
tie. In tn midst Nv an otherwise JOY
Gus dinner tn German ambassadura
turned suddenly pale an complained
Nv a horrible pain In tn stomach. He
was able to lave tn festive boord an
be his own directions was assisted to
o neighborin' ratskellar. where at
o'clock this mornin' he was restin' aisy.
Whin tn dinner broke up at o'clock
TIL guests were most enthusiastic. an
whin tn Jap-nese niinisther proposed
to sing. eft he's a jolly good fellow"
siv'ral Nv tn diplomats bust into tears.
".Misther Bryan was much PLACED
with tn success iv his innovation. He
has dhrunk grape juice fr many years.
sometimes consumin' as NANNY as
forty glasses a day. In fact he sildom
ates a piece Nv pie without washin'
it down with his fav'rite bivrage. on
less pressed be business. TIL sicrety
gathered tn correspondents together
yisterdah AFTERNOON. an. givin' them
each a glass iv grape juice. which they
ex officyo. asked thin to con-
vey to tn wurruld tn news that It is
in officyal circles that tn
Sicrety Nv State has niver dhrunk
booze, smoked or chewed tobacco. took
snuff. swore, gambled, fought chickens
or danced tn jelly glide.
ITO show We how times has changed.
there's me frind Tiddy Rosenfelt goes
up to Michigan an sues tn iditor iv
a story an a-half newspaper fr libel
f'r sayin' that he was well known to be
a white hope among tn petroleum
Nv tn wurruld. If he'd been
in pollyticks as long as have an was
as active an as prom ent he wudn't
have noticed tn insult He'd know
that in pollyticks tn worst men ARE
often libeled, SO what can tn best ex
pict? It's a good thing. too, FIR 1t
keeps sinsitive an thin skinned men
out iv public life an dhrives thin into
journalism. An if he'd known all tn
things that's been said about him be
tn moro substantial Nv his fellow citi
zens hed've stint this iditor letter
thankin' him FIR his support but askin'
him not to overdo tn language Nv
fow'ry complimint Whiniver he
turned out a message to Congress an
a banker reached down in his jeans an
found that TIL dollar he'd put in there
tn night befure was now on'y fifty
cints, tn financeer wud ASSEMBLE other
fnanceers around him an they'd dis
cuss tn failures Nv Tiddy Rosenfelt
He was this an he was that. He niver
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