The Ronan pioneer. [volume] (Ronan, Mont.) 1910-1970, 1913-12-19
"Why. whazzer mazzer, my red

"Why. whazzer mazzer, my red
rose?'
you are intoxicated, sirr'
mo. Nix. Never 'toxicated In my
life. It's the cat That ish 'toyicated,
but let 'er rip and have good time"
And he leaned back and sang:
ooh, | saw crow upon limb
Upon limb,
And | did cock my eye at him
At heat him!"
BY deft motion Mrs. Bowser took
possession of the "dandylion" cough
cure, and then she turned to the clock
on the mnntel and whirled the hands
around until they marked II o'clock.
Then she said:
ITS time we were in bed. The doc
tor must have told you to go to bed
early"
Couldn't Leave His Crow.
"Yesh, he did, but can't 60 to bed
and leave my crow, can i? That
wouldn't be right. You've seen crows,
haven't you?"
II want you to go to bed, sir! Sup
pose neighbor should call!'
Mrs. Bowsher il nabur comes in
shall take him by 'er hand and ask him
to listen while shing:
II shaid to 'er crow. It looks like rain
1t looks like rain
And That ere crow he says to me.
You give me a PAIN.
"For heavens sake, don't yell 80
loud" cried Mrs. Bowser., "DO you
want the cook to come up and see you
in this condition and tell all the neigh
bors?"
cant a fellow have cough?" he
asked after thinking the matter over
for minute.
Eyes"
"Wcll haven't | got cough?"
'But the doctor played trick on
you. That was brandy you brought
home. The doctor ought to be horse-
whipped. IL the minister Of our
church should call, and he may, what
on earth could say to him? Think Of
the situation, Mr.. Bowser, and do as l
ask you to-
"Don' you worry, Mrs. Bowsher-
don you worry tall. If minister calls
you run downstairs and leave him to
me-"
Good henvcns."
'Ill answer bell and tell him to walk
right in. + he asks f'r You Ill tell him
you've got cough and are taking
dope f'r 1t. Zhen I'll entertain him
wiz shong. Ministers like to hear
shongs, don't zhey? III shing him my
crow shong, and I'll bet my hat he
lifts er roof Off latin. Ever hear That
shong?"
Mrs. Bowser Walks tbs Floor.
Mrs. Bowscr was walking the floor
and wondering what to do and didn't
answer.
After waiting a moment to draw a
long brenth and get Il new brace for
his toes, Mr.. Rowser ronred out:
81 asked That crow to have a nip
TO have II nip.
And he shaya to me ash he comes down,
shay. let 'er RIP
Mrs Bowser grabbed him by both
ears from behind and shook his head
TO and fro but he went on with the
last verse just the same:
"Zhe crow and went on 'er spree
Went on 'er spree.
And we ripped up the dear old town
Xhe crow and me-
This last verse was roared so loud
that Mrs Rowser walked down the
bah and opened the front door. There
was n policeman standing at the gate.
and she beckonch to him.
''Is the cook tirunk!" he asked as he
came up the steps
ooh, no. My husband has had Il very
bad cold for several days
81 understand Half the police force
and the commissioner and the mayor
are In the same fix"
".Anl he's had to take aa strong
remedy"
All Taking Remedy.
"Of course he has The mayor was
taking one ns icame past his house. |
saw the shadow OF his crooked arm on
the curtain"
81 think the the remedy has flown
to his head.'
"Withont doubt, madam. The cap
tnin Of my station. who has u peach OF
n cold, was singing Old Black Joe
Wncli came out.
"lf you would assist me to get him
upstairs" suggested Mrs Rowser.
"Why. of co,lrsc-of course There's
hardly night fiat don't assist some
alderman up to his bed"
"Whaz ish it whnZZer maZzer:" QUE
ried Mr.. Bowser, as he caught sight OF
the officer
you IRE going to bed, you know"
"Gotter shing my shong bout zhe
crow"
But he didn't have time. He was
boosted upstairs and on to bed in about
two minutes. and his feet were hardly
flung after him when he was asleep.
you won't-won't'~- qneried Mrs.
Rowser, rs she handed along dollar
BILL
"As silent as the gravel" whispered
the officer as he went downstairs.
For Better, For Worse.
The cook approached her mistress
with much hesitation one morning.
Il tho %r> a.