The Washington times., 1913-09-09
Honquests Of
~ Constance
<(Y AMT got a suspicious nature.
- naturally: but when a girl

XII AMT got suspicious ndtuie
- naturally; but when a gir
comes in an tells yuh some
thing grand HER feller said
! about yuh. 1 think it's about time &c
get out a accident insurance policyr
unused Connie. resting her head on hei
| hand. Il don't know whether he's
a lemon an she wants to wish him on
me. or whether I've got some clothes
Mardi Gras an is PAWN the way fal
enough In advance"
Maybe she Just said 1t because 1t was
true" observed.
Huh! I've been in tn backbitinG
business long enough to know nothin'
skirts what Is fighting for popularity
No, it's tn war signal fer some kind Nv
roughhouse-but I'm waitin' fer tn
next step. TIL reason 1 know so much
cause 1 worked 1t myself once.
There wuz a girl worked longside
Nv ON tn ground floor wv tn exchange
few years ago an hated her like
the dickens. First because she had a
perfec' wave in her hair: an second.
above her position. Tn only time 1
could see she wuz above her position
was when she'd 90 up on tn second
floor, an told her so. Which Nv course
QlQn MAKE Hldlt6TS SWeeteF De-
tween US. At tn time l wuz goin' with
a bald old guy what seemed perfectly
useful when I first net bin, but grad
ually developed triple-plating of
crouch, bore and tightwad. / yearned
at last to mislay him. But he wouldn't
mislay.
well. lots wv times he'd call fer me
at tn exchange an this queen, not
seein' him long enough to notice his
tango tricks. d try to ogle him an
fin'lly she said:
Immediate 1t give me tn grand idea
wv how to get even. So | sez to her
one evenin' as though was hurt about
my Charles thinks yuh've got tn
meltingest eyes he ever seen" l seZ.
Then she begin to turn double flip
flops whenever he wuz around, an at
the same time | begin treatin' him like
he wuz redheaded stepchild. An tn
two treatments worked together. an
sure enough he got wished on her.
NV bein' above yer position an thinkin'
yerself superior. tn prize output Nv
that kennel wuz the Shining Light, /
put up with Gran Mogulishness fer
four months.
His college yell wuz that he'd never
given none of his relations a moment
NV anxiety an that he got tn medal
fer elocution when he graduated frum
grammar school. He also KEEP sayin'
that no credit wuz due him for bein'
first in his classes an a model at home,
cause II wuzn't no effort. 1t JUS come
natural to him. Do yuh know that
kind? Well, all his teachers havin' long
since moved away an his family havin'
moved to Hackensack Heights. youh'd
have to take his word fer it. yuh know.
An SO I has to lisSen to how he wuz
always held up as a example to tn
shiftless members Nv tn family; an
how his teacher. on his graduation day.
cried all over his white lawn tie an tor
him she wuz sure that he'd never keep
his mother guessin'. An whatever made
n good son'd make Xxx Quality
meal ticket so his wife needn't put a
spy glass on him every time he went
ont tn front door. All this. NV course.
wuz supposed to be bait fer me to fall
Ia his arms an say:
Marry me ere l croak, Vivianr
But d'yuh know it got me so riled
at seem him pinnin' blue ribbons all
over himself I'll tn time that at last tn
storm broke an l sez to him:
Say. I'm afraid yer perfection might
be ketchin', and I'd rather die Nv tn
pip. So wrap up yer bunch NV creden-
tials an git. A good son may make a
good husband. but I'm afraid you'd b.
too good 70 bs tsuA"