Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1913-03-13
At the End Of the Rainbow.
IN PRAISE OF LIARS.
By Walt Mason.

. I'D hate to have Ganderson's repu-
tation.'' remarked the retired merchant.
Everybody knows that you can't be-
lieve a word he says"
well such a reputation has it's re-
deeming features" replied the hotel
keeper. you always know where to find
Ganderson. II he says one thing, you
know the other thing is true. If he came
into this hotel. and said it was fine,
sunny day. I'd know it was raining out
doors. There is some pleasure I'm con-
versing with such a man. He admits
that he hates to tell the truth except on
such special occasions as Washington's
birthday. and SO you never expect to find
him anything but a fountain of falsehood,
and he doesn't fool you.
If Ganderson went into q grocery and
said he wanted a bushel Of potatoes or a
few yards Of New Orleans molasses and
that he would pay for them on the first
Of the month"; the grocer would laugh him
to scorn. Then the grover would give
credit to some majestic citizen of severe
ly moral aspect. and when the time came
for payment the majestic citizen would
be invisible. Half the bad bills in this
country are run by men who look as
though they simply couldn't tell a lie
and who have worked up a reputation
for uncompromising integrity. Mighty
few of the bad bills are run up by men
who are generally known as liars, for
obvious reasons
Il get stuck every now and then and
generally by men who pride themselves
on their reputation for veracity. One
ing stories about fish he had caught and
wild animals he had killed. Tom had a
wide reputation as an expert extefnpo-
raneous liar. 1t is said thai he told
the truth once several years ago and
suffered from nervous pr0stration after
1T. Well, a stranger of sanity appear
ance sat here for a while listening to
Toms interesting and instructive anec-
dOtes and then that stranger rose. with
a look of intense scorn upon his face and
said he couldn't stand it to hear such
falsehoods. They made his blood run
cold.
Then the stranger got his key and
went upstairs to his room and Tom was
away. probably with a determination to
reform. Next morning that virtuous
stranger didn't loom up for breakfast
and when an Investigation was made it
was found that he had departed by way
Of the fire escape. and he owed for three
days board and lodging. doggone him
THE man who has a reputation for
plain and fancy prevarication is q safe
citizen. The man you have to look out
for is the individual who seems shocked
at the sound of a fish story. The one
WHO is known to be related to Ananias
by marriage can't sell you any mining
stock or patent rights. When you see
him coming you tell him at once that
there's nothing doing. But the eminentIy
respectable gentleman who wears min
isterial whiskers and who refers to truth
as though he had q first mortgage on II
is the one who will sell you 5000 worth
of stock in an aperture in the ground and
then leave town between two days.
II have quite a local reputation as a
liar. / never was ambitious to do any
fancy stunts in falsehood. but / always
let my imagination have free rein and
can't see that 1t has injured me any,
I have noticed that the people of this
town always seem to enjoy my converse
ton and spend hours in this hotel listen
ing to me, and / sometimes have trouble
in getting rid of them. The man who
runs the opposition hotel has a fanaticai
fondness for the truth and never tells
Ia funny story or encourages anybody
else to do so, and the result is that he
has no loafers in his lobby and his hotel
is patronized only by colporteurs and
people with side whiskers.
when a man getes q reputation for
being truthful he surrounds himself with
a cold. cIammy atmosphere that repeIs
warm FLOODED people"