davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
BY NO MEANS ORIGINAL IDEAS
Today Are limitations of Those of Many Centuries Ago.

If learned savants are seeking the origin of gossamer skirt and cobweb waist they need not stop with a Scotch professor and a petty two cen turies of antiquity.
 Snefru, who was king of Egypt more than 4,000 years ago, before the great pyramid was built, had his royal barge on the Nile rowed by girls instead of men. These chosen oarswomen were dressed in linen so fine and diaphanous that it was no more than a filmy mist, accentuating rather than hiding the brown young bodies underneath. In short, the row ing costume designed by Snefru was much like the dancing costume worn by some beauties who have managed to kick their way into the good graces of Pittsburgh millionaires.
 Solomon had considerable experi- ence with the fair sex, and he wrote that there is nothing new under the sun. Perhaps he was thinking of the newest "creations' of some modiste in Jerusalem.-Ch Tribune.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

One of the medical journals publishes the following prescription: When the throes of indigestion and the qualms of dyspepsia are making your life miserable. just purse the lips and whistle brisk. merry tune. The first thing you know the stomach will have lighted itself, the liver will be working good and strong. the blood will be bound ing through your veins your brain will be clear and vigorus, and you will feel twenty years younger. When you think the world is going to the dickens right away,
 Whistle; When you look out in the morning. think ing. What gloomy day.
 Whistle; When it seems that everybody wants to try 10 pull you down. When it seems that all creation wants to plague you just for spite When you see those black spots dancing and your tongue feels thick and brown,
 Oh, whistle, whistle, whistle Whistle on with all your night  When you get to rather doubting that the Lord is overhead,
 Whistle: Don't you care who hears you-go it till your cheeks get hot and red.
 Whistle; When you think the work you're doing isn't worth the time it takes, When you've got to thinking nothing that you try will turn out right, When your heart feels like a doughnut and your poor old headpieee aches, Oh. whistle whistle. whistle Whistle on with all your might. When you hate to hear the children as they wildly whoop around.
 Whistle; Don't you worry if the neighbors aren't gladdened hy the sound.
 Whistle; Stick your chest out in the atmosphere and threw your head way back. Fucker up your lips and go it till things get to looking bright You can be d locomotive and scare trou- ble from the track
 If you whistle, whistle whistle Whistle on with all your might.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Settinu Down to Facts,

Bernards mother tries faithfully to break the boy of his habit of exag geration, and every improbable state ment is closely questioned Once aroused by the sounds of feline dis turbanee, she asked:
 What is the matter on the back porch. Bernard?"
 There are 40 cats out there,' the boy replied from his post of observa, tion at the window.
 You don't mean that there are really 40?' his mother asked.
 Well, then, 20'
 80 many as 20?"
 Maybe there aren't more than ten"
 But, are you sure there are ten?' mother went on mercilessly.
 Well, mamma" replied Bernard decidedly there's our cat and Thompsons cat-and I won't fall an other cat"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
a VeaI's Too Hioh.

"All our food except sugar has ad. vanced two-thirds in price since 1899, :" said H. Wallace Corson, the Denver statistician. sThe bureau of labor statistics back me up in this"
 "The men responsible for these ad- yances are begging for another chance to serve us. They are begging our pardon. They are prodigal sons cant we forgive them?
 NO, I say no!
 And I'd politely inform those fel- lows that the supply of fatted calves is not as large as the number of prod igal sons"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Made the Scanenoat-

M. Jean Homolle, the new librarian in-chief of the BibIiotheque Rationale, in Paris, was general manager of the national museums of France, and con sequently of the Louvre, when La Gioconda," the celebrated masterpiece of Da Vinci, disappeared. Although M. Homolle was absent at the time, nevertheless public opinion demanded a sacrifice for the departed Mona Lisa,' and he was relieved of office. He is a native of Paris, sixty-fve years old, and is member of the Legion of Honor and of the Institute. The world-famous library over which he presides has 100000 books, 2,5O0,- 900 engrayings, and hundreds of thou sands of medals, maps and manu- scripts.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
ALMOST BEYOND
 HUMAN ENDURANCE
Were the Agonies Which Miss Lance Underwent. She Lives to Tell
 the Story, However.

Palmer, Okla-In a letter from this place, Miss Forrest E. Lance says: As I have been benefited by the use of Csrdui, the woman's tonic, l want to write this letter for publi- cation, as it may be the means of helping other suffering women.
 For three years, 1 suffered so, at times, with my back and bearing down pains, 1 would think l could not possibly endure the pain. l gradually got worse, and would look with dread for these trying times to roll around
 Finally I decided to try Cardui, the womans tonic, as l had heard so much of it's help to other women, and how glad l am that 1 did, for I can truthfully say that I have been greatly benefited by taking only four bottles; in fact, it has entirely re- lieved me.
 can truly sympathize with any sufferer from those awful pains due to t"omanly trouble, for I have certainly had the experience of them"
 AS medicine for women who suf fer from the numerous ailments pc culiar to their sex, or as a tonic for tired, nervous, worn-out women, Cardui has record of more than 50 years success.
 It has benefited thousands of women in this time, and should do the same for you.
 Give Cardui a trial.
 N. B.-Hyyite fo: Chattanooga Medicine Co., Ladies' Advisory Dept. Chattanooga, Tenn for Steefai I.sfyNefions on your and 64- page book wrapper. Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Price of Peace.

She appeared to be somewhat ex- cited when he came home that night, and he naturally asked the cause.
 The man in the top flat has fallen in love with our cook" she said
 What of ,t?' he asked
 He's been trying to get her to run away and marry him.
 Do you mean the Iaan who prac- tices on the cornet every night?"
 She said she did, and he made a dive for his pocket.
 Tell the cook" he exclaimed, ex, citedly, that I'm a poor man, but I'll give fifty dollars if she'll do it."
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
HAPPY OLD AGE Most Likely to Follow Proper Eating,

AS old age advances we require less food to replace waste and food that will not overtax the digestive organs, while supplying true nourishment.
 Such an ideal food is found in Grape Nuts, made of whole wheat and barley by long baking and action of diastase in the barley which changes the starch into most digestible sugar
 The phosphates also, placed up un- der the outer-coat of the wheat, are included in Grape-Nuts, but are lack ing in white flour because the outer coat of the wheat darkens the flour and is left out by the miller These natural phosphates are necessary to the well-balaneed building of muscle, brain and nerve cells.
 T have used Grape-Nuts," writes an Iowa man, flor years and feel as good and am stronger than I was ten years ago
 Among my customers I meet man every day who is well along in years and attributes his good health to Grape Nuts and Postum which he has used for the last years He mixes Grape-Nu with Postum and says they go fine together.
 For many years before 1 began to eat Grape-Nuts, I could not say that I enjoyed life or knew what it was to be able to say I am we'll. I suffered greatly with constipation, but now my habits are as regular as ever in my life
 Whenever I make extra effort depend on Grape-Nuts food and it just fills the bill. I can think and write a great deal easier"
 There's Reason" Name given by Postum Go, Battle Creek, Mich. Read The Road to Wellville," in pkgs.
 Ever He4d the above letterY A new sSs I'm from time to time. They
 srss' ,d full of human
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
To Keep Plants.

A good way in which to keep plants fresh without watering them when the house must be closed is to take all the plants to the cellar or some other cold place and set them in tubs, with an ordinary brick under each flower pot. Pour into the tubs just enough to place the tubs by an east window if possible.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Enumerated Report.

Linstrom-I hear that Billums turned all his property into bonds, dis inherited his son, who married a chambermaid, and left everything to a college.
 Janiver-O, he wasn't so mean as that! Under the terms of the will the college will have to employ the son, at salary of $7 week, to cut off its coupons.-Judge
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Misled by Ragtime.

"The band is going to play our na tional air" remarked the host to the distinguished foreign visitor. "Of course you have heard it?"
 "Er-yes," answered the distin- guished foreign visitor. q don't re- member exactly how the music goes but the words, I believe, are to the effect that somebody or other is wait ing for a steamboat"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
New Aruument.

Mrs Patterson tan ardent suffra- gette)-Well, see by the paper this morning that the new banking and currency bill will add about s500,000,- 900 to oyy currency 9{Iass.-5on (pleasant1y)-Yes Wish we might come in for some of it. don't you?
 Mrs Patterson (savagely)- just the point. We would if women had the vote.-Life.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
His TheorY

Colonel said the beautiful grass widow, how do you account for the fact that men seem to be growing less and less inclined to get married?"
 Well, you see, there's so much talk about stopping the divorces I sup pose most men are afraid the agitators may succeed in having something done almost any day"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
He Told Her at Last.

There is something he said. that have wanted to tell you for a long time, but"
 "Oh. Bertie," she said, blushing sweetly mot here in the car before all these people. Wait. Come this evening""
 Its merely that you have a streak of soot down your nose. but I couldn't for the life of me get word in till just now"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Not Fit For adies

Public sentiment should be against it, and we believe it is; there can be no req son why ladies should have to suffer with headaches and neuralgia, especially when Hunts Lightning Oil gives such prompt the ladies to try it. All druggists sell Hunts Lightning Oil in 25c and soc bot tles-Adv
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Whats in a Brow7

He had brow that lowered high,
 4 splendid one it was. I trow; Another man was standing nigh
 Who had a slanting brow and low. He with the high brow stood behind A counter. selling braid and lace Which seemed to call for little mind The other fellow owned the place.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Severe Rheumatism

Grove Hill, Ala: Hunts Lightning Oil cured my wife, of severe case of Rheumatism and my friend of tooth ache. l surely believe it is good for all you claim for it.-A. R. Stringer
 % and soc bottles All dealers.-Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Hunting for the Interesting Part.

What on earth do you find inte. esting in that stupid book?" her friend asked
 T haven't found anything worth while in it so far.' the beautiful girl replied, but after mamma had read is she tried to hide it from me-
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Lydia E. Plnkham 8 V e g ct a ble Com pound has done for me. I was weak, nervous, and cared for notbin g bu t sleep. Now l cati go ahead with my work daily and feel ten years younger than before I started taking your medi- cine I will advise
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Folly and Wisdom,

Horace says: 'Mingle a little folly with your wisdom "
 Yes, that's easy enough. But it's another matter when it comes to mingling al little wisdom with your folly"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Another Sufferer Relieved.


 Romayor, Texas. -"I suffered terri ply with displacement and bladder trouble. was in misery all the time and could not walk any distance. I thought never could be cured, but my mother advised me to try Lydia E. Pink hams Vegetable Compound and did. Fl am cured of the displacement and the bladder trouble is relieved. I think the Compound is the finest medicine on earth for suffering women. - Mrs. VIOLA JASPER, Romayor, Texas.
 If you want special advice write t0 Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine Co. conf. dentiaD Lynn, Mass. Your letter will be opened, read and answered by a woman and held in strict confidence.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
BusY Trip.

Il had a tough time delivering the mail yesterday" declared the post man.
 How was that?'
 Had a bulldog and a chunk of liver in the same delivery. y.'-Louisville Courier-Journal.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
On the Beacb.

Anything in that floating bottle?" Great find.A Had girls name in it."
 "Shdcks! l thought maybe it had a drink in it"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Different.

Grammercy-So your wife is going to sue for a divorce. Did she meet her affinity while away in the coun- try?
 Park-No. When she came back she met mine-Judge
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
RUB-MY-

Will cure your Rheumatism and all kinds of aches and pains--Neuralgia Cramps, Collie, Sprains, Bruises, Cuts, Old Sores, Burns, etc. Antiseptic Anodyne. Price 25c.-Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Fleeing From Danqer.

Where are you going?" asked the housebreaker.
 Up to detective headquarters, said the safe-cracker, q have reason to believe the police are on my trial"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Sharp.

First Hopeful Nephew (proudly)- Aunt says I call her up on the phone oftener than you do.
 Second Hopeful Nephew-Did she accuse you of anything else?
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Variable,

How many ounces are there in a pound?" asked the teacher.
 We'll" replied the boy who listens attentively, ma says it depends on where you deal"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
A DOCTORS STATEMENT

]. R. Wells, M. D., Weidners, Ark. writes "Ihave been practicing in Arkansas 2oyears and constantly prescribe Mendenhall S Chill & Fever Tonic, where quinine is contra-in- dicated for children and adults with weak stomachs. It sticks where others fail" No cure no pay.-Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

man stole cash register from a Kansas restaurant-sometim almost anything is preferred to restaurant meal
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Switzerland will soon have a hy- droelectric plant using the highest waterfall in the world so harnessed, the water dropping 5.412 feet.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Plea With a Punch to It

Clerk (to employer)-I should like a four weeks vacation this year, sir, if possible. 1 never felt so strong in my lifei-Puck
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
The lucky Dollar.

When a man finds a dollar he gen. orally keeps it as lucky piece He does not feel that the dollars he earns are worth keeping.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Scant Compliment.

Our guide tells me that in Morocco men buy their wives
 I've seen his I'll bet he got her at rummage sale.'
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
How to Move Them.

First Rector-I am going to preach to the 400. How can 1 move them?
 Second Rector-You'll have to move them in mousines.-Judge.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
WHENEVER YOu NEED
 4 GENERAL TONIC TAKE GROVES
The Old Standard Groves Taseess chill Tonic is Equally Valuable General Tonic because it Acts the Liver, Drives Out Malaria, Enriches the Blood and Builds up
 the Whole System. For Grown People and Children

You
 showing
 It andF Weakness debility
 Mothers and Pae S Children Removes Iousnes Relieves depression Puhes the blood True Tonic and Complete No family should
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
His AdYantaue.

That real estate agent is a neat ad- vertiser."
 Yes; he manages to keep his houses in print
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
T he Idea.

Why are you trying to keep al this scandalous gossip afoat?"
 Because I want to be in the swim 9
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Stick to it. is our advice to the fly on the sticky paper.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Use Roman Eye Balsam for scalding sen. sation in eyes and inflammation of eyes or eyelids. Adv
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
ARE YOU coNsTtPArFDq

WrRhts Indian Vegetable Pills have proved their worth for 75 years Test them yourself now. Send for sample to 372 Pearl St., New York Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
Consolation.

T really fear am losing my mind" Well, don't worry about it. No one is apt to notice it"
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Exactness in little duties is won- derful source of cheerfulness.-F w. Faber.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

A liar has great advantage in not being hampered by facts.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Worms expelled promptly from the hum ar system with Dr. Peery's Vermifuge "Deao Shot" Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Wisdom and silence are agreeable companions.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
WOMAN FEELS 10 YEARS
 YOUNGER
Since Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound Re-
 stored Her Health.

Louisville, Ky" take great pleas ure in writing to inform you of what
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Don't buy water for blung Liquid blue Blue, the blue that's all blue. Adv.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Many a good brain throb escapes from underneath a cheap hat.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

Many man who gets in on the ground floor never gets any higher.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

You Can Stop Carbuncle Boil After 1t begins to form, by using DIR. POR- TIERS ANTISEPTIC HEALING OIL. 25c, Soc, s1.00.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
The Monument.

Let us fashion lofty shaft and white That will tower forever and a day Upon some splendid, enduring height To dazzle all who may pass that way Not in honor of anyone Who founds a nation, or with his pen Or brush surpasses what has been done Since art has appealed to the sons of
 men. Not for the hero who wins in war, And not for the man of millions who Keeps working for more and more, but
 for
 The man who, having enough, is
 through.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

any woman to consult with you before going to a doctor. Mrs. INIzE WILL LIS, 2229 Bank St., Louisville, Ky.
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
important 10 Mothers

important 10 Mothers
 Examine carefully every bottle of CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for infants and children, and see that it Signature of I1HZzzzGI In Use For Over 30 Years. Children Cry for Fletcher's Castoria
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26

READING LESSON Nehemiah s:9-2l. See also Acts 7:9O-34
 GOLDEN TEXT-"Thou art a God ready to pardon. gracious and full of com passion slow to anger and plenteous in mercy. "-Neh. 9:17 (Am. R. VD
The Green Forest tribune., 1913-09-26
INTERNATIONAL SUNDNSCIlOOL
 LESSON

CBy E. O. SELLERS, Director of Evening Department, The Moody Bible Institute. Chicago)
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1913-03-06
COUNTY N EWS.
Items for this column should be later than Tuesday

Mr.. Arthur N. Gilbert, with several
Of his men friends of Martinsburg,
came to Middleway. by automobile OF
Thursday. where, after calling to SEE
relatives, drove on to Charles Town anc
thence by Kearneysville returned home
in the evening.
Mrs. Jos. Grsntham with her daugh
ter. Miss Edith, were in town Friday
visiting friends.
Mr.. Tom Bates went to Waynesboro.
Pa. last Wednesday and spent the day
and returned home the following night.
Mrs. N. R. Roberts, Mrs. j. W.
Kearns and others spent last Friday
with Mrs. J.. W. Eddy near town.
Mrs. Dan Fry of w ashington has
been quite sick since her return home
couple weeks ago. Her friends re-
port her better at this writing.
The Knights of Pythias with their
Invited lady friends spent last Monday
evening delightfully."- at their lodge
where they were all treated to refresh
ments of cake, ice cream etc. All had
a good time.
Mr.. Henry Jennings has been quite
sick, but at this writing is reported
better. DR. Skinner is his physician. 50
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1913-03-06
MiddIewaY Notes.

Ray Biddinger. very promising
young man of IS years of age and
adopted son of the late Mr.. and Mrs.
Albert Davis, died in Hagerstown Feb.
%. He was always greatly attracted
to our ancient little town and often ex-
pressed desire to be buried in Middle
way when he should be called from
earth His friends remembering his
wish brought his remains here on last
Wednesday and laid him to rest in Ma.
sonic Cemetery.
Mrs. A. J. Willis was in Middleway
one day last week calling on friends.
Mr.. William Lyme of Fairmont W.
Va, has been quite ailing from a
severe cold. He is home now to re-
cuperate.
Miss Sarah Barnes is also reported
very i'll at this writing:
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1913-03-06
Berryyille Items.

Miss Ellen Baker is home from Hol.
Inns College, Va, for several days and
will attend the Inauguration.
Mrs. Harrison of Winchester, Va
was the guest Of her sister, Mrs. S. S.
Thomas Jr., last week.
Mrs. J. P. McCreery of Roanoke, Va,
was the guest of Mrs. P. H. Powers
last week.
Miss Mamie White has gone 10 Rom
ney, W. Va, to visit her cousin, Mrs.
C. Montague.
4 Mr.. W. H. Patteson has returned
from trip to Boston, New York, and
Philadelphia.
A number of people from Berryville
and vicinity attended the Inauguration
in Washington this week. Among
those leaving on Sunday and Monday
were: Mrs. j. R. Elder and daughter,
Misses Annie Moore, Ellen Baker,
EMILY Powers, Jane J. Moore, Dean
Pulliam. Mrs J.. N. Smith, Mrs.
Emma Howell, Messrs. Eugene and
Lewis Glover and others.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1913-03-06
Harpers Ferry and Bolivar
News.

Our most patriotic birthday George
Washington's was celebrated the even
ing of the 22nd in the Auditorium of the
High School. A very interesting pro-
gram was rendered. America was sung
by all present, standing. The prize of
FIVE dollars in gold given by Messrs
Washington & Alexander of your town
for the best essay was awarded two
girl pupils. Tableaux was feature of
the entertainment.
The Snow Hill School House, which
was moved to the County Infirmary
last fall will be used as chapel for the
inmates. The pews of the Presbyterian
Church of this place have been recent
ly installed in it..
Mr.. Joe Kane has bought the Doran
property on High Street, opposite the
Times office.
Miss Grace Anderson of Detroit,
Mich and sister, Mrs. Bentz of Mar
tinsburg, the daughters of the late
William Anderson of this place have
been visiting Mrs. Sarah Baden.
Mrs. Florence Kirwin, who came
home for the Christmas holidays, has
returned to New York.
Mrs. Julia Sponseller is visiting her
son, Mr.. Hey Sponseller in Hancock,
Md.
Mrs. Annie Alstadt is on the sick
list.