The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-06-22
Ardbella Foeg Her Opinions
BY KARI. KAFFER

TINS aint going to be no Marie Bash
kerchief confessions, to have the
world setting up and taking no.
tiee-to say nothing of being scandel-
lized. Me and Marie haven't got thing
in common, being a S l never fell in love
with no married man nor any other kind
when | was u years old.
In fack the only incidenees of any i'm
portence that | remember happening to
me at that tender age was falling or
fence and skinning my shin, and
having to take vermifuge after | had
ct too free of green apples and plums,
brown sugar and such like.
So, as l said, this amt to be no ro-
mantle confessions but jest SIM
pie setting fourth of facks as they
look to me.
My niece Polly had objection to
me writing for the public seeing as
spelling aint my strong point--but, as
I says to Polly, II you stand back on
spelling and grammer you will never
get nowhere.
For instants, look at Mr. William
Vines. Ii he was took up and judged
on his spelling, where would he be
at2
And reely, when I read his writings,
/ feel that I am some speller and a
educated person.
1t aint always the people that's the
highest educated that counts for the
most In this world anyhow, its them
that does things
For instants, there's old Perfesser
Snodgrass, and his wife. Sally Snod-
grass. Now the Perfesser's been
through two or three unyversitys, be-
sides teaching 80 years in the Rabbit
Valley schoolhouse, and he's got all the
education they is. But what does he
do that counts for anything?
He's Interested in bugs and worms,
and there amt nothing in life as i'm
portant to him as counting the legs of
catterpillow or finding out which
end of a inseck the sting is on.
Where the money is coming from to
pay for the coal and the grocerys and
so fourth. and other little unimportent
things like them. he jest leaves to Prov
idence and Sally, while he goes chas-
Ing off after green fly.
Now Sally, she's like me- Me and
her was raised in the same place, and
both of us went to school to the Per-
fesser two months out of the year til
we was foreteen. and after that our
education was in learning how big
famlys can live on a few akers of
ground and no ready money.
Experints was our teacher, and it
learned Sally a whole lot more than
jest spelling and reading. And me,
too--though to do justice to my dead
and gone relic, Hiram done better by
me than the Perfessor ever done by
Sally.
Now to give a little sceddule of
day at the Snodgrasses. Sally gets up
at o'clock-and a weak gnee too
cooks three meals, tends to COW and
about two hundred chickens, cleans up
her house and yards, weeds the gar
den, churns, does her sewing, mends
the Perfesser's close, and sells the milk
and butter and eggs that makes their
living.
The Perfesser he gets up in time
for breakfast, then he fools around
with box of nasty squerming things.
looks at some pore little bug through
microscope and gets all excited and
writes off to sientfffic sosiety that
he has found a extra leg on a inseck
Then he gets his name in the paper
that he is a great naturalist.
OF course it's a big honor to the Per-
fesser to find extra leg on a bug
and Sally oughter feel reel proud
But his name in the paper, as she
says herself, don't ease her back none,
and II don't buy no lnnerment for her