The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1913-10-02
The Peeved
Bill Clerk

We've got a new boarder at the
house." said the bill clerk, as he deX-
terously trundled his stool into posi-
ion and perched himself. His name
Is Timothy Hayseed, and he's from
Squash Center. He'd have stayed
there, but the cows were always mis-
taking him for something to eat and
be got bitten up quite badly"
How interesting" remarked the
cashier "A very odd name, isn't it,"
well, I won't say that's his sure
enough name" the bill clerk kindly
explained. But 1t ought to be. He's
the worst jay you ever saw. He's got
freckles all over his nose and-here's
the joke:
cat breakfast he asked the landlady
for another plate of cakes. Honest!
And when she asked him if he would
mt like anything worcestershire, you
know-he says, 4 believe I'll have an
other piece of steak, please. just that
way. And he'd jabbed two pieces
when the dish went around He's
looking for job. think we ought
to make room for him here"
''Did the old lady throw the coffee
pot at his head?" asked the cashier.
"She ought to have" replied the
bill clerk, with a grin. ITS a wonder
she didn't"
"She didn't them"
"Of course, she didn't said the bin
clerk
'You don't mean to say that he got
his plate of cakes and his steak?" de-
nanded the cashier. "Surely not?"
"Of course, he did," answered the
bill clerk. did you suppose she'd
tell him he'd had all she could afford
to give him? What kind of joint
do you think it is?'
well, we'll" said the cashier. "No
doubt it would be rather remarkable
If the good woman objected to supply.
ing more food than this rustic per-
son paid for"
ooh, guess he didn't get any more
than he paid for If you come to that"
said the bill clerk.
'The strange thing was that the
young man should ask for what he
wanted then?" queried the cashier
"Is that it, Johnny"
''If you knew the old lady, you'd
think it was" said the bill clerk.
"And he got the cakes-and the
steak" said the cashier. 'He certain
ly must be blockhead. II he'd
kept still he'd have had the pleasure
of leaving the table hungry, in all
probability.
''Its to be hoped he will learn; II
he doesn't, it's hard to predict what
viii become OF him.
"To begin with, he'll go around ask
ing for job, | suppose, and he'll
keep on asking until he gets it, in
stead of politely waiting for the job
10 come to him. It's quite evident
that he hasn't any delicacy whatever
Think Of young pan-with freckles
on his nose, oo!-asking busy people
to give him work, just because he
happens to want it. Shameful"
well, II you think it's all right to
put your feet in the trough, you can"
muttered the bill clerk.
''I'm not sure that it isn't all right
if you happen to be hog and your
associates are hoggish," said the cash
Ter.
I'm not casting any reflections on
your boarding house" he continued
81 merely want to call your attention
to the fact that this is a cold, cruel
world. 1t isn't enough to look hun
CRY; you've got to boiler for grub
and that in no uncertain tone. II you
do that it's a hundred to one that
you'll get it,"
"Your friend, Mr.. Timothy Hayseed
is making a pretty good beginning, il
you ask me. When he gets his job
he'll ask about anything he wants tc
know and then he'll ask for a raise
OF salary"
That's all the good it would do him
II he worked here" remarked the bill
clerk.
"You can't ever until you try" said
the cashier "After he's got most OF
the knowledge regarding the bust
ness" he continued hell ask for a
partnership, and he'll naturally get
that
"In course Of time he'll ask the
other members of the firm to retire
and they will gracefully skidoo. II
they don't, he'll scoop in a majority
Of the stock and kick 'em out.
Having accomplished this, he'll ask
the principal firms In the same line of
business to consolidate with him and
allow him to direct their destinies
and they will do SO.
"Then he will consider that his In.
dustry is entitled to a little special
legislation OF the fostering order, and
he will ask for 1t. II he can put up
the right kind OF an argument to the
commission, he'll get what he asks
for"
"Put up is good" commented the
bill clerk $50 all you've got to do to
be the head OF trust Is to ask for
another plate of buckwheat cakes
when you are young man. Is that
it?"
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