New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1913-05-14
AS | WAS SAYING

When Miss Ellaline Terrss sat for an interview
the other morning on British humor. it was on
Punch" that she sat hardest Not that We blame
her: Americans who call Punch" the centre OF
gravity" quite quite innocent, lot having
heard the famous advice: Punch, brothers. pu,
Punch with care" For it is true that Punch can
not be enjoyed carelessy lie is not for the hasty'
reckless touch -and-go reader. He is not quick
lunch.
Next time you feel like jeering the centre OF
gravity" consume copy at your leisure. Nibbe'
Fletcherize, inwardly digest. Give Punch an en-
tire Monday Then, at about twenty minutes past
four on Thursday afternoon. you will burst into
great laugh
Every man his own "blurb." We now under
stand why King Nicholas beseged Scutari and de-
fled the Powers and posed patiently in the lime
light. He was about to publish his memoirs.
They are fast electrifying Bridget CHANGING
through the catalogue kindly sent us by IA
nous electrical establishment, we discover
FL stovo. FL Boio.
FL Grlllo. Ill Tosto
III Comfo Ell Tostovo
Thus majesically docs mother tongue walk
Spanish.
We had long seen it coming this campaign for
Better Husbands and IL has warmest approval;
especially the Better Husbands Contest where
they judge ms by points-waist measure lhteNi-
gence, hair area temper. number of teeth mo tair
counting gold ones) measurement Of head before
and after having picture in paper. etc, etc All
very nice; only, how wish We could return the
compliment. Would. IL we dast but we dassn't
Guide to Chinatown and arber Of Bowery taste
eti
morast It's doity Irish trick fr gorilla to
get bundle stuck him. an den go OFF an leave
de bundle TO go up in de air, see? An, brethren
how true that is! Almost az lofty "A moral sentl-
rnent as the one good Steve Brody posted in his
saloon: "Cursin and swarm don't make you no
tufer in the eyes Of people that heres you.
DR. William r. Foster has given us a very enter
tanning account Of the college president but care
lcssly omitted the chief duty OF all college,
president is primarily detective. He employs
spies Every student is Swallowed. and in most
cowardy and dispicable manner.
No matter what the college or who the president
il is always so. Ask the students. Indeed things
have reached point where the sly little FRESHMAN
with the ruby nose, the Bosco eyes ana the sultan
of Suu glide and bottle sticking out or ms MP
pocket cannot come whooping up the chapel aisle
more than seven or eight mornings a week without
the presidents deducing frivolity. There is only
ona possible explanation. Hist! Seuths"
Yes beloved women's dress is so shameless that
We shall all wind up amid the bowwows Consult
the pages of history. See how utterly without
precedent this awful calamity is. and how In all
former outbreaks Of the kind the nation went
straight to perdition Read, for instance the ter
rible chapter beginning: There was once a bicy-
Gle"
There is more about the Portland. Ohio, boy po-
lice They will not make arrests They will mere
" snoop around after evidence and report to their
superiors Ingenious. Of course. and novel. yet we
cannot indorse the Blab Squad We have Just been
reading that Shoes are more active and we guess
Il is time slippers were. X. IL. H.