davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
THE SCHOOL OF LAW.

Faculty of eight. Courses OF three
years, giving thorough knowledge OF
tbeory and practice of law Occuples
OVID building opposite The court house
henjamin F. Leighton, LII. b., Deau,
~ 5,h street N. vs..
FOR catalogue and special insorma ton
address Dean Of Department.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
THE TEACHERS COLLEGE.

Special opportunities tor teachers
Rtk uial college COURSES in PSYCHIC OK, .
tedas,Yy, Education, &c. with degree
of A. H.; Pedagogical courses leading
TO Pn ). degree. High glade cuurses
III Normal Training. MUSIC, M%nuaj
AIS, anu Domestic Sciences. Gradu-
at-s Helped TO POSITIONS. Lewis 3. Moore
a. Nj, Phi. D., Dean.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19

Mrs. John + Carter has bee u
considerably indispos.d for the pas,
week or two, but At this writing sn.
hs considerably improved.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
u q w A RID
UNIVERSE TIN
WASHINGTON, D. G.
STEPHEN Nj. NEW MAN, d. l.
PR ESIDENT,

IL HSII1IGN
Located in Capitol Of the Nation
Cnmpus or over enty "cves. Auvun-
tagcs uTla>st:d. sluutin scienainc
and general equipment. New CailIrkl
Library. New .>citUce HILL. Faculty
OF over one huudl,d. 1882 sLuuruie
from 81 States and 10 other cuunlrl,.,.
Unusual opportunities for stlt-Suppori.
NO young nan Or Woman OF eiIergy VI
capacity need be deprl, cd or ltn 2uyau-
taxtB.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
Battered In Pest Office At A.rtinsburg
!. Va. a. SscorS Cia.s Matter
! 900 cold frame cabbage plant for sale

Ar. Macon Roman left today for
Warrington, thia State, whcre be
bas secured . position.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
NOTES FROM THE NEWS.

Senator Smoot has bill appTopriat
Ing $500 900 annually to experiment IL
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
Professional Schools
THESCHOOLOF THEOLOGY.

Interdenomir atioDal. Five profess
sors. Broad and thorough co IS. Ad
vautages Of conUectloH with great
University. Students Aid. Low ex-
penses, Isaac Clark, ID. D., Dean.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
THE SCHOOL or MEDICINE

Forty-nine professors. Mod-1n lab
oratorles aud equipment. Connected
Wllh beW Freedmen g Hospital, costing
half million dollars. Clinical iacll ties
not SURPASSED IN America. Post-grad-
uate School and Polytechnic Edward
BallOch, NJ. d., Dean 5'b and W
Streets N. w. ". e.. MCNEIL, N. d..
Secretary, 901 r St., N. ".
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
SCHOOL OF MANUAL ARTS AMI
APPLIED SCIENCES,

Furnishes thorough courBes. Six
Instructors. Offers rOur-ytar courses
in Mechanical ard Clvll Euaiueering.
aud Architecture.
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
THE COMMERCIAL COLLEG

Courses III Bookkeeping, StenogrApny
Commercial Law. History, GIVES, &c .
business aud Eugllsn high schooi &c u
caiioi comDihed George W. COOK, u
IA. Dean,
Pioneer press. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1882-19??, 1913-04-19
THE ACADEMY.

Faculty of IL. Three Courses OF four
years each. High grads preparatory
school. George j. Cummings, A. M. :,
Dean.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
MISUNDERSTANDING THE ASSETS

encouraging note that Lawsons contention o-wit
that the through the postal department can do
things stock gamblers being supported
by practical experience the federal courts Several cases are
pending those wherein the accused charged
with fraudueny using the mails in the sale OF mining stocks
In appears that promoter sent through the
mails of 100000 of certain mine whereas
witness who part OF the property admitted that
100000 tons would have been about correct"
For that exaggeraton the charges that
with violating those sections OF the postal laws which
deal with fraud
But, bless u.s. il little exaggeraon like that is to be
cassed fraud how classify, for instance that
aggeraton which raised S200000O0 the Car
ncge steel plants into steel trust capitalization Of $780,
10000?
II the promoters in be barred from the
mails for exaggeration there any why
the promoters in the other should also be barred
the mals'
They stand alike and all fours. the lawyers
times say a misrepresentation OF
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

without ts,ing TO DO too
exact as TO time. the world
IA which we live is duo for
another glacial period In about
$4,000 years.
DIR. Frederick A. Cock. who
is exploring the wilds " vau-
deyilland and lecturtng twice
a day ut Pantages theatre this
week. has made the prediction
repeatedly.
Tho prospect, however. Is Zoo
remote TO alarm US. Wo ro-
fu0 TO worry.
Thew is a moro immediate
prospect which concerns VA
deeply. We do not expect to
live $4,000 years. And whom
we slough Off this mortal coil
well. heaven. we've been led
TO believe. IL In the temperate
zone. and when Lueifer foil II
was not In polar regiona that
he set up his establishment.
All. no. We do not greatly
Tear the cold. Not the cold!
WOULD BE GREAT
TO BE LIVING THEN.
Indeed. there Is something
alluring about the picture
which the sturdy doctor draws.
We are inclined to regret that
no has set the time so far In
the future when the Ice fields
OF the North shall begin their
southwark creep. to join forces
with the frozen cohorts from
the farther Pole. and King
Frost shall rule the world.
We should like 10 be- living
then.
Certainly. a crisp snow pack
would be plcasanier 10 walk
upon than tho siush that's I'M
derfoot today.
The artist has pictured more
giowingly than ! could possi-
bly, do the Joys OF the glacial
period. II We could hut 1.-Two
until that time. We would SEQ
the Ice trust reduced 10
penury. the Coal trust a beg.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Hail government ownership of railroads 1t is coming
rapidly.
The astounding popularity of the parcels post as shown
In Seattle and the rest of county in its first ex-
psrmena days. keeping than the express companies
guessing. . , -.
There vital, brotherly almost lite and death e@uoh
between express railroad companies This country mas
been among the few in the past which failed to give MS people
the benefits of parcels post. This country is sn' among
the civilized nations which do not their railroads
the parcels post grows in popularity as the volume OF
Business grows the demands for greater limit than IL
pounds and satisfied the government viii be con-
foned bigger and bigger postal deficit unless present
conditions are changed This deficit has been with us Tor
years President Taft his characteristic feeble way tried to
sve problem by advocating higher postal rates on
n0qazines. -,
solution does lie there and certainly VIII not
He there when the parcels post boadened adequately in
every respect to meet the needs OF the people
United States will then become the biggest ex-
press company the world and in the past the biggest
express companies have always managed to get good
foothod railroad railroads Uncle Sam will
be no different Uncle Sam will find he must go into
government ownership keep that postal deficit down
and make his express business possible -
HERE'S TO UNCLE SANS RAILROAD SYSTEM
IT'S GOING TO REACH US QUICKER THAN MOST
OF US EXPECTED
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
BAR FRAT" DOGS
FROM CLASS ROOMS

MADISON. Wis. Ian. THE
Unworthy OF Wisconsin. In a yer.
dict issued 10 the college daily. an.
nonnces that hcnceforth no dogs
VIII be allowed In any classes OF
tho university.
Tho fraternity members have
been In the habit of taking their
maScots TO classes, but In the class.
room. while deep subjects we're un-
der discussion. Hugo. the Delta Up
siion mascot. caused such q commo-
ton flea hunting that In was neces-
Bary TO adjourn the class.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
A Hidden Danger

1t is a duty Of the kid
neys to rid the blood Of
uric acid, an irritating poi
son that is constantly FORM
ing inside.
When the kidneys fail,
uric acid causes rheumatic
attacks, headache, dizzi-
ness, gravel, urinary troub-
les, weak eyes, dropsy or
heart disease.
Doan's Kidney Pills help
the kidneys fight off uric
acid = b ringing new
strength to weak kidneys
and relief from backache
and urinary ills.
Here's home proof
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
1hsSun;ooNaDe1
He Thinks Mixing Surprise Parties and Weddines |.
Bad Business

n. ~. jan. la surprise party
Is a good thing In It's way. but
70 mix one OF them things up
with a wedding Is bum stuff
the day a felcr gets married
he ought TO be on the level, II
mite be the last time ne ever
Will tell tho truth. and he
should make partiekler effort
TO do II
There's a guy over In brook
lin probably thinks that way
now, even n he dident ust TO
The guy In sam snitko, a
tailor, and he has got a lot OF
trubbel
sam he had n wife a while
back. but she dide. and all sam
had In the world TO show for
his married life was 10 chill
dreu
well sam he dident soc how
In tho dickens he was going 10
rear up them 10 children with
out no skirt around the house.
and he begun lookin around
for a number 2
there's always lots OF danes
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

but all the time not TELLING
her nuthinB about ths 10 Kids.
he was a reglcr deseayer. he
just let her think he was old
batch
and as he met up with her
at a danEe or sumthlng. ana
she dident know none OF h,s
old friends that knew him and
the late wife, he got away with
IL
so bimeby he ses vii you.
and she SEES yes, and they got
hooked up
you got TO hand II 10 thu
boob for his crust. he takes the
poor skirt rite out TO his housA
In the subarbs. and as soon a.
they git In the frunt yard out
comes 8 of the kidds, all yslin
o pa, pa
and the luther 4 that ainf
big enough to run out, all s.arss
holerin inside the house ana
bawlin buddy murder for their
pa
The new mrs. snitko she give
a awful gasp. and she looked
at sam, and he turned pail and
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Look! Doc Cook Says That Fifteen Hundred
Hence World Is Due Another Chilly Glacial Period


manner Of speaking. However
we do not expect to live 1900
years.
Meanwhile we venture IA
make a prediction OF our own
II Is that II the doctor i've
10000 years. he will stln b
calling Peary a liar.
And II Peary lives Is D0s
years. he viii still be calling
Cook a liar.
And nobody will know for
sure. or care much, whether
Cook got there first. or Pears
got there fra, or II both "a
there, or II neither got thera
For, when alls gaid and dona
there's nothing there when Won
get there. and there's nothing
20 do when you get there but
TO turn around and come back.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
HIS
SISTER FROM
BURNING HOME

MOSCOW. Ida, Jan. 7.--Break-
Ing into ner room while a fire. con-
Stunning their home, Was playing
about her. Mayrus Miller dragged
his sister. Catherine. through a
window. over the roof OF a shed
piled deep with snow. and after
saving her. became partially I'M
conscious from his experience.
Ffrcmen later found them, aud
today the pair are recovering from
severe burns and shock. Both are
University OF Idaho students.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
~-~--.saaa--7a---aa-
BISHOPS BROTHER
LANDS IN JAIL

CINCINNATI. Jan. 7.-"Booze
did H. That L. the whole story in
three words"
This was the statement OF james
Morcland made tonight TO Chief
Potiebaum OF the Central Police sta
ton following his arrest on the
charge OF stealing an oyercoat
He is brother OF Bishop More
land OF California.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
JURORS COULDN'T SPELL,
so SLAYER MUST HANG.

MEMPHIS. Tenn, Jan. 7.-un-
less the governor intervenes.
William Fitzgerald must hang
Aug. is for the murder OF his
wife in hotel here. Tho jury
recommended him to tho mercy
OF the court but didn't put In
the words mitigating circum-
stances" because they didn't
know how to spell mitigating.
Tho law requires these words to
mako mercy obligatory on the
Judge in passing sentence. So
the judge said death, instead OF
life Imprisonment.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Si2hInuTE4
Vaudeville

| SLAP: Are you going TO pro-
mote the public health and swat
the fly?
THUD: No. I'm going to pro-
mote the private health and not
swat. That's what.
SLAP: Why' Are you too SEN
sitive?
THUD: Not mt all. It's the
other people Who are too sensitive.
Once | saw . ny on mans nose
and sWatted H. and just for that
the man sWatted me.
SLAP: Was he angry because
you had hurt the fly?
THUD: That's just the trouble
i hadn't hurt the fly. Hereafter
I'm going to use fly poison.
SLAP: hope when you do you
take enough OF II TO prove fatal.
What do you suppose attracts flies
To n bald's mans head?
THUD: It's the reflection. II
sees another fly In the polished
surface and drops down 10 talk to
IT, Did you know flies spread dis
ease? 49,
SLAP. No. al see them do IN
light on the table and try to spread
ths butter.
THUD: You ought TO live In
house with screens. o
SLAP did i've irb house
with screens but the flies camaoin
anyhow
THUD; why was that?
SLAP: Because the bars were
too far apart.
THUD; Then why didn't you
leave the house?
SLAP: Couldn't the bars were |
too close together.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

caab INF Not muchl Tho wife
and kids are safe at home, hi
bcrnating. Whose deal ( Some
body's shy. And they'll play
until the morning light steal
Ing grayly into tho windows
warns them that II is April AT
the earliest.
THERE MIGHT BE
DiScomFoRTS, TOO.
There Ii, OF course, reverse
side OF the picture. While we
do not relish hives and priekly
heat, we may say with equal
emphasis that We have never
enjoyed gooseflesh and chill
bIains.
II is as well that II Is not left
for us 70 choose. We should
not know what to do. We
would blow hot and cold. in a
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Best Short
STORIES
Of the Day

An Asiatic ruler was in the
habit Of exacting presents from
those who came to do him hon.
age One day q man arrived
bringing a basket OF bananas.
Furious at the gift being one
Of fruit only. the prince com
msnded that the bananas should
be thrust down the donors
throat. AS the latter was being
led away to have the sentence ex-
ecuted he was seen to smile. and
the prince bad him brought back
and asked him why he smiled.
Nothing, oh prince" he re-
piled; only my vife's mother 10
even now approaching. and she
bringeth basket of pineapples."
A well known business man
tells this experience. He says:
Il told my office boy one day
that ] would have to have the
morning to myself. and he must
keep visitors out OF my private
room. i don't care what you tell
them. said I. Make up any story
you like. Get fresh with them IL
they are too persistent An hour or
two later. as | afterward learned, n
said I. Make up any story you
like. Get fresh with them II they
are too persistent An hour or two
laater, as | afterward learned, a
lady called and insisted on seeing
me. The boy assured her that II
couldn't be done. But I must see
him. she said. I'm his wife 'Awp
was Jimmy's reply. That's what
they all sayv OF course my wife
went away good and mad. Well.
no, the kid didn't lose bis jot. I
couldn't blame him. He was only
obcying orders. Newark News
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Who'll Come Forward

o G. Beard caught couple Of dogs
AZ bis sheep. Killed one and wounded the
other The one killed was black and
ths owner can have the hide-we.t
Unity Reporter.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

To General Dan Sickles In his
pathetic old age things are coming
about as fast and hot IA they did
that historic July morning when he
left n leg in the Peach Orchard.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Modistes are going to get ideas
Tor dNsss from the Egyptian mum.
mies. II win be a bore for WON
en- TO have to unwind every night.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

A tracer has been sent out fr
the old-fashioned ball tosser who
was satisfied with bis salary.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

TO be found. as everybody
knows. and II wasent long be-
foar sam got "A mock down TO a
nice yung lady by the name OF
yetta mink
miss mink she scanned 10
think sam was fine little guy,
and be shined up to her 10 beat
tho band
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Little Worries.

Who'll do the milking when tho
cows are dry7
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

The rural car.
rier on route ~
says tn parcels
post keeps him
9uessin', a. tn
party receivin' a
q box o. cut
flowers by mail
one day 10 list
az likely ter get
a tub o. sauer.
kraut tn next"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

DOM In the Making
Hello! IL this the information
editory"
Yea"
Il want 10 ask you a question TO
settle a dispute. Does freezing
spoil a parsnipT
mo: you can't spoil parsnip.
That ALT Good-by." - Chicago
Tribune.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Mrs n r George viii give n lecture
a. tho Presbyterian church based on her
experiences In Europe last summer
Peoria tfli1 Star
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Doctor Emdee--Your mother.ln-
laws condition is very serious.
Henpcck-Cet. down TO cases.
Doc Am ! to fear for the bost or
hope for the worst?
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

consents to ride IN that inaug-
ural paradc. because. he thinks.
the streets would be too crowd
ed for him.
AFTER viewing New York
from Ellis island, Castro said
he'd be glad to get back TO Eu-
rope. What an insult TO that
stuck-up old Manhattan town
AS ONE OF the means OF
keeping young. ventilate your
mind, says Lillian Russell.
Wonder if getting brand
new husband now and then
isn't mental ventilation!
YOU can. get a woodchuck
out by coaxing him or watch
ing his hole, but you can
smoke him out. We guess
that those sergeants-at-arms
who can't serve papers on VIII
lie Rockefeller never hunted
woodchucks.
GOLD production in 1912
fell off $4,000 in the u. S.
Hal Now watch the cost of
hving take q tumblel
WHILE asking for a mar
siage license at Milwaukee,
Csbc Raduchsi tainted away.
TAere ought to be a law
again ~ tender things like Otto
t1ssryms Milwaukee girls.
Marrying a Milwaukee girl
txsxs even the best OF our
prize fighters.
CHlcACoAN has invented
. combination knife and fork.
0uwsdyl We can now see a
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
SEATTLE PROOF

SEATTLE PROOF
Testimony Of a Resident Of Fifteenth Ao&
Mrs. Jansss Richard, 10
FiftseAth Ava, Seattle
Wash, sAys: 81 have uss1
Do>n's Kidney Pins f@
kidney trouble and ~
glad to say that this me&-
cine was just what my sys-
tenn required. Before tax.
ing this remedy, l had
tried many others but had
got no relief. | am now
well, my kidneys are nor
NAL and | have no moro
pain or that tired feeling
in my back"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

CHlCACOAN has invented
. combination knife and fork.
0uxsdyl We can now see a
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

MEAN OF HIM. :.
Tho LbcraIist - Well. what did
you think of my new musical
comedy.
Sour. Minded Cri;ic-Grcat. Who
designed the scenery and cos
tumeay
Mike. am going 10 make you
q present OF this pig"
"Ah. sure; an us just like you.
SORT"
What Has Become Of
The old fashioned man who
used TO say TO his daughters
beau. Young msu. what are your
intentionsT'
The old-fashioned ditto. Young
man. what are your prospectHy"
Tho ditto who used TO aay TO the
ditto. Young man. can you support
my daughter In the style 20 which
she has been accustomedg"
The oid.fashioned lover who
used to spread his handkerchief
on the floor just before he pro-
posed.
The old-fashioned girl who used
to say. This Is no sudden"
The ditto who used 10 say. "T'iI
be sister to you"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Suggestion TO men: II the wind
blows your hat off. do not bother to
chase It. Let the spectators do IL
for you.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

Tramp--Lady. I'm suffering from
Indigestion.
Lady OF house--What can I do
for your
Tramp - Give mo something TO
digest
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

way to lift both the crust and
insides OF pie.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
WOODROW

consents to ride in that inaug-
urai parade. because. he thinks,
the streets would be too crowd
ed for him.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

GOLD production in 1912
fell off $4,000 in the U. S.
Hal Now watch the cost of
hviag take tumblel
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
Often the Case.

Often the Case.
Men AFRO always late. | have
waited here since 7 o'clock for my
husband to come: now it's half af-
ter s."
And when wero you to meet
him7"
AT & O'Clock. "-Lustigo Blaetter.
Il see a man 60 years old had
his first train ride down In Texas
the other day"
THAT may account for his long
life"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07

she beat II
by golly he amt ever bin able
10 find her sinse, and now he
ID suing for divorce
lie bet he cant git II too quick
to suit her
my goodniss, 10 ready made
Kids. can you blame her for
the fast getaway johny
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1913-01-07
SKYCACK FROM MARS

HE TAKES WIRELESS OBSERVATIONS IN HIS NO
EARTH CusTOMs
Carson City daily appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1907-1930, 1913-12-18
NEW EDISON DISC PHONO-
GRAPH

Is not a talking machine but a Won
derful musical instrument.
Hear them all. Then hear the Ed
ison. You'll be more than satisfied
to take the Edison.
We've been in business a long
time, Mr.. Reader. No one knows
the talking machine line better than
we do. We've watched the Edison
develop until today we unhesitatirg-
ly claim it to be the best monograph
OH the market. Mr.. Edison has now
standardized his monograph, it is
now perfect in both side and cylin-
der form. His 0. K. has been al
fixed to every detail. Perfect sound
reproduction is the general verdict.
All instruments have genuine dia-
mond point reproducers. All rec
Crds play from four to seven min
utes. Don't forget to come in and
hear the Edison. Drop in any time
and you will find others listening
to it. Then you will understand
why we are so enthusiastic over it.
MRS. c. w. FRIEND.