The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1913-08-12
THE MANICURE LADY.

II guess there amt many real hu
man beings that goes to the board
ing houses at the seashore, George"
said the Manicure Lady. 81 was
down to Bensonhurst for a week end,
and was entertained beautifully by
friend of mine that always does
everything right. She and ner .hus.
band is perfect darlings. George. He
always takes her wherever she wants
to go, and she thinks he is the only
man on this globe. She Is one of
them kind Of wives, George, that
thinks when she hears about Julius
Caesar that her husband owuld have
had Julius's job If he had been living
then.
"But they was the only two regu
lar guys on that porch after we had
ate our dinner and went out to let ii
digest in the shade. There was four
married women there about forty
years old or so. and two young chaps
that had Travelled extensively on the
Subway. all the way from the Bronx
to Franklin street. They were set
ting there talking to the old gals.
showing how brown their arms was
from swimming and how much mus
Gle theyh ad, and the old gals was
fine to them, beaming on them Just
as If they was grown up men. After
the two chaps had went for their
third swim that day, the old gals be-
gan telling what divine walters the
kids was. and how one Of them was
very witty.
"But oh, dear doctor. When the
name OF ono of the younger married
ladies came up. u lady that didn't
happen to be there at the time, there
was sure some scandal.
"'They say her husband drinks
something brutal says one of the
old hens.
Noulul L Dc Sui ~ lstN' Sts'
another. She would drive any man
to drink with that temper Of hers. y
"What else do you expect from
that kind of folks" asked the Head
Barber. II never sat on a boaring
house porch in my life. unless 1t was
with some of the old Romans. long
after the women folks had went to
bed. never could stand all the cruel
things they said about the other wo-
men. Many u young married lady
has been kissed and called 'dcarie' by
the old fat and forty girls. only to be
hammered into a pulp when they
moved fifty feet away. WAS up in
the country not long ago and heard
some of those rocking chair danes
working. Two of the young chaps
there happened to be live ones. and
went to the village to get few stems
on n hot day. They mentioned 1t
when they got back home. ana the
next morning when they started out
one of the danes says Look at MI
Doonan and Mr.. McShcrry!' and an
other says. Yes, there they go!
suppose when the young fellows got
back in the evening every one OF the
ancients says Here they come.
THAT'S the trouble. George SAID
the Manicure Lady. This would DC
a whole lot different world in which
to live in if it wasn't for the There
they go.' and Here they come! poo
pie. II theysce young fellow throw
ing himself away and going to inc
dogs, you don't hear many iolkS
shouting Come back and get wise!
They all say There he goes! ana
they say it as cheerful us a kid say
ing oh, mamma, here comes the cir
Gus parade
This is too hot a day to do much
demoralizing, George. but | do wish
that fols would be kinder to each
ether and bury the hammer. 1t amt
hatchcts that needs burying in this
world, George, it's hammers"
WILLIAM +. KIRK.