The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-08-25

You say a pedestrian has rights,
querulous person.
"Certainly." replied the policeman.
Well, mehhee he has. But 1 can,
help wondering what would happen
to me- II ! went along the street maxi
ing the same kind Of noise as some
Of these automobile horns"
A southern lawyer tells Of a case
that came to him at the outset of
his career wherein his principal wit
ness gas a colored man named Jack
son. supposed TO have knowledge OF
certain transactions not at all to the
credi' Of his employer. the defendant.
Now. Jackson" said the lawyer.
Il wan You 70 understand the i'm
por-ance Of telling the truth when
You are put on the stand. You know
what will happen don't You, If you
don't tell the truth?"
"Iass!r." VAS Jackson's reply: in
dat case l expects our side will win
de case"
\ m:lliner endeavored 70 sell to a
co!ored woman one OF the last sea
sons hats AT a very moderate price.
1t was a big white picture hat.
Law. no. honey" exclaimed the
oman %! could wear that
Id look jes' like a %Dlueberry in a pan
O milk"
ALTO. Bill: You do look pale and
thin. Bill. Tot'z wrong. Bill: Been
Thus spoke n jov,al treouenter
Of the gutter to a friend ne had not
seen for weeks.
Bill passed a horny hand across
his brow
M: 5;5 w s;5 : =, r;,s from M 70 OIL, in the h
hours rest. Think OF IL, mate.''
'Lumme:" replied Bits mate. And
where are yer work;n': 'ow long
I amt been there yet" re:orred
Bill, with a roam. II begin ,omor-
rer".
A gentleman who happened 10 come
in rather late at q dinner found that
the guests had finished soup and were
on with the next course. When ne
sal down a waiter came Up n said,
soup SIR No, thanks he re-
Piled, w~hereupon the waiter wen;
away. Another waiter. seeing he had
nothing, said to him. soup. STRIP He
replied rather testify. No. thank
you" 4 third waiter, who say him
come in and took compassion on him.
placed the soup il front of him.
Look here. my man. is this compul-
sorv?' NO. sir: its mulliga.awny."
replied the waiter.
i approach you in a WORTHY cause.
NJ Iitewadd. We rant 20 raise
Sae''ooo--a prominent philanthropist
offers 70 contribute q quarter IF t."
hastily. Il don't mind giving another
quarter. Can G change half a dol
iar?"
some oun warriors Of the
Blackfoot tribe sat n the shade enc
DAY watching a group Of Iaborers who
were constructing a srads FOR q -a,l-
road branch in Montana. Suddenly
8 hivoiis-. the first they had ever
seen, hove in sight. He had got off
the train az The las. station and was
the Indians watched the wheelman
without a word until he passed from
view then they expressed their SEN
timen,s.
No good white man" one re-
marked.
NO, declared another. with erea:
scorn. Heap lazy white man-sits
down 70 walk::"-Harper's Monthly
Magazine.
Ever n who has visited ST. Paul
and Minneapolis knows there is a
decided feeling of rivalry between
these two large, growing cities. a
speaker addressing an audience at
St. Pau spoke of the reckless driving
OF motor cars tina, at that time was
prevalent in Minneapolis and ex-
pressed the hope that st. Paul would
not follow the example Of her rival
city.
Why" said the speaker. II have
heard that some four n FIVE inhabi-
tants are killed in Minneapolis BY
automobiles every week"
And TO hi. amasement from the
audience came a voice: Wa'aI, il
amt enough" f