New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1913-06-15
AS | WAS SAYING

You will read i'm ancient chronicles that "heh t"e
ruby haired Crusader Sir Rufus de Burgh' paid MS
fop,oi,s visit 10 the monastery at Saint-Brieuc ne
said 70 the abbot Now tell US, old chap no" diu
you lose your har?' ,
Nothing daunted the abbot replied. Sir knight
it was red so | pulled II OUT.
4 Maltese cross marks the spot where the sooa
man fell and YOU may see it TO this day but the end
is not vet for a certain fretfulness has been at
ributed 10 the red headed since, and now comes
wise Professor Davenport looking into them with the
eye of science. =
For our part, We think science IS taking a"l"'
risks and will discredt itself We ADMIT the ire,,
fu1ness We have often observed it. Yet we ho'u
bat Tho red.beaded come into the world peaceful
and anlablc and have fretfuness thrust upon them
IL, the bunorlsts This is why Titan painted whefe
he did Seeking a city overhowing with red-heaued
Girls he naturally established himself at venice
which has ever been their haven and heaven owing
to its freedom from white horses
Tho brave fellows who stayed under water thirty
six hours in the belly of n submarine are still claim
ing the worlds record. and their boast is allowed -
go unchalIengcd. on. these degenerate days! 40
one any longer reads the Bible.
That admirable editor. Mr.. Robert Lincoln obren,
has been talking to the doctors. Says they should
EXPRESS themselves reporters and thus TO the pup
lie Happy thought, only Il has been someho"
brought 30 the notice OF doctors that not all editors
are Robert Lincoln o'Briens. Comes reporter duIy
accredited by r. L. OBJ. The doctor talks Dear
how tell YOUR country loafs too long In the bath-
tub" Boy does word FOR word Country thrilled
Doctor dclghted-till the following Sunday.
Then f. is that he reads in a rival paper: Dirty
or Die, Never Battle, DO as Weary Waggles Does
and Live Long in the Land. BY Charles W. II.
sandringham NJ D." And 1t Is 10 this other editor
not to Mr. Robert Lincoln O'Brien that the doctor
owes an international reputation.
There has been much talk about the Sultan Of Jolo
(SulD since he proclaimed himself Emperor Of the
United states and had be severely spoken TO py
Brigadier General Pershing. and some are saying
that his NASTY had been misled by presents received
from our officials mstakng them for tribute. This
shows the farreachng effects Of the great Roosevelt
damage suit. Even the Sultan's ntmates are scared
into silence. But bold and do not hesitate TO
declare over our initials that when we last saw
his majesty he was partakins far too freely OF the
cocktail that follows the flag.
The sbopkeepers along the Rialto still com
planning that the sidewalks too denseiy peoped
with matinee idols. and find on investigation that
this is true and great hardship to the shopkeepers.
How can they hope to enice women into their shops
with all those handsome matinee idols outside"
Postcard. from never mind where: Great lark
Stroed into the state Capitol Just In time to see
veto. 1t wore a long frock coat white waistcoat,
gray trousers and n cockaded stovcpipc and carried
coppcr-tpped window stick as It walked from the
Executive Chamber To the House Laughed mt to
split. T."
Evidently our correspondent refers TO the sergeant
farms who bore the veto and much we'll deserved
ridiculc. For when u comes 10 magnihcence. one
must 90 the whole goat-knee breechos, bucked slip
pers gold lace bcorne hat-everything that behtS
super. one is then sublime, perfectly selt-con-
sistent fright to whom humanity can bow down with
a straight face Grotesquerie arrives with COM
promise Says Chescron. GIVE the king crown,
but don't give him haf-a-crown!"
Illinois has gone In for more or less equal suffrage
more rather than less-and is the time to
watch Illinois and see homes devastated women
masculnized, government overthrow and society
DISRUPTED lust az in the other suffrage states. where
all these horrors are prevalent that they brazenly
defy detection.
We were filed with a great peace when news
reached US that Mr.. Meredith Nicholson was being
talked Of as "A possible minister TO Portugal Most
fortunate! We predict jolly times for Brother
Nicholson especially at Oporo and Madeira, as the
inhabitants Of those cities have long shown them
selves appreclatlve Of the best cellars. r. L. II.