davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
AN EARLY PURE FOOD LAW.
English Bakers Had to BE Careful In
the Old Days.

English Bakers Had to Be Careful In
the old Days.
In the time Of Edward I. Of England
%lnnkeepers were not permitted to make
either bread or beer. The former they
were obliged by law to buy from the
baker and the latter from the brewer.
In "Customs Of Old England f. j..
Smell declares that II the law defended
what was considered the legitimate
claim Of the baker to a proper liveli-
hood II WIS equally solicitous for the
welfare Of his customers and was most
severe upon the baker who sold bread
deficient In weight or quality.
For the first offense he was drawn
on a hurdle through the principal
streets, which would be thronged with
people and foul with traffic, with the
offending loaf suspended from his neck.
From a pen and ink sketch of this cere-
mony 1t appears that the unhappy
tradesman wore neither shoes nor
stockings and had his arms strapped
to his sides. 1t seems also that two
horses drew the hurdle, which suggests
that 1t ratified along at a pretty lively
pace.
For the second offense the baker en-
joyed another ride upon the hurdle and
then underwent an hours exposure in
the pillory. If he proved so incorrigi-
BILE as to commit the offense a third
time his oven was demolished and he
was forbidden to follow his trade.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Wearing the Trousers.

Ancient Britons were among the peo-
Pile whose wearing Of trousers was
noted by the more civilized an
clients who eschewed them "Braccae''
~(breeches) seem to have impressed the
Roman mind very much as Chinese
pigtails did the modern west. Gaul,
beyond the Alps, was at n time
known as Gallia Braccata-Trouser
land-and Cicero taunts a man with
having sprung from "trousered" an
cestors. AS Roman ways degenerated
the use OF trousers began to creep in,
and 1t is recorded that Alexander Sew
erus wore white ones, previous EN-.
perors' trousers having been crimson.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
A HANDICAP IN GOLF.
Il Was e Rather Mean Advantage, but
II Won the Game.

Il Was e Rather Mean Advantage, but
Il Won the Game.
An unusual golf handicap was played
on one of the local links recently, the
prepayment of the same winning hands
down. One Of the rules of golf is that
one must not talk to a player when he
is about to make a drive, nor must 9th
ers discuss any subject in his hearing.
1t might take his mind of the game for
just an instant, and that might prove
fatal.
In Kansas City lives a crack but ex-
tremely nervous golf enthusiast. He
had been in the habit of beating a fat
and phlegmatic friend until the latter
tired of 1t.
"I'll tell you what I'll do" the friend
said not long ago. 81 will play you
eighteen holes If you will give me a
handicap"
Done said the rvo player
name the handicap"
'Three times during the game, and
not more than three, | am to be per-
mitted to stand behind you aud say
Boor while you ure preparing to
drive"
Every time It was the nervous mans
play his fat friend walked up and just
stood behind him. Never once during
tho game did the fat man say "BooH'
or anything else. But the anticipation
at the expected "Boog' was fairly
nerve shatterlng, and the fat man won
hands down.-Kansas City Journal.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Distance Of Planets.

The distance of the III and planets
from the earth may best be perceived
by the following fact; A train of cars
going at a mile a minute would
reach the moon in $50 days, Venus In
ffty years, Mars in seventy-slx years.
Mercury In 10 years, the sun IN 175
years, Jupiter in 74O years, Saturn in
1.470 years. Uranus in 3,1G0 years.
Neptune in 5,O55 years. To reach the
nearest fixed star our train. steadily
maintaining fits mile a minute speed,
would require about 4O,000,O00 years.
You may rely upon the general accu-
racy Of the above schedule,-New York
American.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
HIS EIRsT CASE.
The Young Lawyer Made the Court ett
Up and Take Notice.

Nuo NNNOH Lawyer WACO NNo 1oNFt GtA
Up and Take Notice.
Several prominent attorneys were
discussing the peculiar and rather hui
morous questions put To- witnesses by
young attorneys entering upon their
legal work, and one OF the number
vouched for the authenticity Of this in
cident:
Il went up to the superior civil court
one day to hear a young friend Of mine
try his hrst case. All his relatives and
friends were there, ard the novice wore
a most serious expression as he started
to question a witness. He did nicely
until he asked the man:
Ibid you have a contract with the
plalntinr
"'Yes.' replied the witness.
"'What kind OF n contract was III
"'An oral one replied the witness.
"'Wm you please produce itT
1.-THE witness stood stock still staring
ut the attorney and then looked at the
Judge inqulrlngly. There was a ripple
Of laughter throughout the courtroom,
but still the young attorney did not
catch on and, looking toward the
judge, remarked:
"'YOur honor, I ask you to give the
witness until 2 O'Clock to produce that
contract
THE court could not longer withhold
and Joined in the laughter. Then the
young lawyer saw his mistake and
with Redeemed face also had a good
laugh."-Boston Record.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
TALES OF CATS.
Stories That Come From the Historic
Tower Of London.


Tower Of London.
Two stories Of the intelligence and
sympathy Of our feline friends we're
told me during one Of my numerous
visits 10 the Tower Of London while /
was living in England.
Southampton was a prisoner In the
Tower with the Earl of Essex during
Elizabeth's reign. In some strange way
or by some unrecognized faculty q ia
vorite cat Of his found his abode and
suddenly appeared to him, having made
an entrance down the chimney. After
his release by Jamos l.. Southampton
had his picture painted with his faith
full friend at his side. The portrait, |
believe. can today be seen at Wilbeck
abbey.
The other tale is OF Sir Henry Wyatt,
who was committed to the Tower dur
ing the reign of Richard III. and sui.
fered much from want Of clothing aud
food. He would have perished IL a cat
had not come down into his room and
warned him by lying IN his breast
and saved him from starvation by
bringing him an occasional pigeon
caught on the leads. Although the
keeper was under orders not to i'm
prove his food. be agreed to cook any
thing which Sir Henry provided, and
the pigeons which the cat brought
saved his life. he also had a picture
painted showing the cat offering a pig
con through the bars Of his cell-our
Dumb Friends.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Hard Questions.

oh, tell me, does the setting sur err
feel a sinking pain7 Why is Uniform a
Puzzled One") a weathercock so vane7
Do stars require a gun to shoot2 What
makes a bucket pail7 What tailor
makes the chimney's SCOT? Who writes
the comets tail?
And why are dogs so lovable. how
eve much they whine2 Pray tell me.
Mr.. Editor, what makes the 6r tree
pine7
why is a vessels hind part stern
Who sings an old hens lay? Please tell
me, for I'd like to know, who wears
the close OF day2-London Answers.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
PLAYING THE PIANO..
Present Day Methods From the View
point of a Cynie.

Present Day Methods From the View
point of a cynie,
The piano is one OF our best known
musical instruments. 1t was invented
several hundred years ago aud In Its
earlier incarnations was known as the
splnet or the harpslchord and afforded
eminent artists May opportunities to
portray languIshing ladies seated be
fore II, says the Chicago Post.
The piano comes either as an up
right or a grand. The grand Is a
large, fat proposition that takes up
several hundred dollars worth Of room.
while the upright has n nice smooth
top on which btc-a-brac may be
placed.
The piano is usually played by young
ladies until the young man proposes.
1t Is also played by young men in tin
pan song shops. In those places the
youth. who has flowing hair and n
discouraged necktie, allows a cigarette
to hang from one corner of his mouth
while he shouts a song from the other
corner and uses the loud pedal exclu-
aiyely.
In the old days, before women be-
came advanced as they are now. II
was considered quite some dolngs to
playa piece on the piano which re.
quired the hands to be crossed. Now.
adays the plano Is fitted with a self
playing attachment, and the young
mar caller feeds a porous plaster
into II.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
WANTED MIXED TEA.
How the Iron Duke Ordered II sorvst
70 His Timid Guest.

10 His Timid Guest.
The reports OF a revival In the con
sumption Of green tea in England re-
call a story Of Wellington. told in
Horsley's "Hsecollections Of a Royal
Academlcian''
AT Strathheldsaye II was customary
at breakfast time for the dukes IA
vorite mnn servant to bring in a long
tray with a number OF small silver
teapots. Que for each guest. In those
days people had their choice Of black
or green tea. and the duke, himself
putting the tea into each pot, question.
ed his guests individually:
What do you take, sir, black OF
green7' In %stentorian tones.
ION the particular occasion referred
TO his guests included the future Lord
Denman. who had been consumed
with nervousness ever since he bad
entered the house at the thought OF
converse with his distinguished host,
and when the question was shouted
at him as to black or green the poor
youth hesitated, stammered. and when
the question was put a second time
with some Impotence the reply came
out with n rush at last:
81 take It mixed. your graceP
THE duke was taken aback at the
unaccustomed answer, but in a mo-
ment roared out:
Take Mr.. Denman two potsr"
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
SHE WAS A CREOLE.
Her Visitor Was Sorry For That unsa
tio Waa Enlightened.

Her Visitor Was Sorry For That ursti
tio Was Enlightened.
It was showing in the north, but "a
New Orleans the air was as soft as
May, and In a garden brilliant with
flowers and sunshine the winter Wis
itors drank after luncheon the famous
creole coffee.
"How good this creole coffee isr'
said a young man.
Il make It." said the hostess. Il am.
you know, a creole"
The young man looked shocked, hurt.
"Well after ALL" he sais in a low voice,
you can't help that. and I'm sur no
sensible person thinks any the worse Of
you"
His hostess, who was very beautiful,
with hair and eyes like night, laughed
merrily.
"Dehne the word creole" she said.
And the young man replied, "a creole
is a descendant Of French or Spanish
immigrants. with a touch Of negro
blood in his or her veins"
"And the word means just the oppo-
sitter the woman cried. "a creole is a
descendant Of French or Spanish immi-
grants whose veins hold not a drop Of
negro blood"
"Well, WE'LL / didn't know that"
"Nor" she said. Nobody from the
north does. The word creole is prob
ably the unique word OF the dictionary,
a word that Is universally misunder-
stood. Why, It is as though you thought
up there In the north that white meant
black."-New York Tribune.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Many East Indian theaters keep
their performances going until 4 or .
o'clock in the morning. These dramatic
orgies are not, says the Times Of In
dla, however. due to the length OF the
plays, as IN Chinese theaters, but to
the fact that the tramcars do not be-
gin running till . o'clock. AS the
spectators gather from distant villages
and have strong objections to paying
gharry hire, they expect to be enter
tained until the trans start.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Queer EGYPTIAN Burial customs.

GucGT Egyptian DhTiai Oo9tOHlo"
The Egyptians have many curious
customs In connection with the burial
of their dead and the healing of the
sick. At every Moslem funeral, for in
stance, there are hired mourners, vary
ing in number according to the wealth
of the deceased. These funerals are al
ways headed by old blind men, carry
ing long STATS in their hands and wall
ing loudly. They are followed by the
relatives and friends of the deceased,
and then comes the coffin. This is sue
ceeded by two or three Of the native
fat carts common to Cairo, filed with
women mourners. Mourning, in fact, is
quite a profession among the women.
Every day you see groups Of them
squatting on the ground outside the
hospital at Cairo, waiting to be hired
for q funeral.-Wide World Magazine.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
WEIGHTS AND MEASURES.
Care With Which E~nslsnd's Standards
Are Preserved

Care With Which Enaland'e standards
Are Preserved,
Every twenty years government OIL
ciais compare the current weights and
measures with the standards, which
are sealed up IN the staircase OF the
house Of commons. There are only
two standards. the pound weight and
the yard measure. The standard pound
Is of platinum, which despite Its weight
Is no larger than a cubic inch. and.
small as II is, the metal OF which II is
composed Is worth fi0. The standard
yarl is a bar OF bronze t~hirty-eight
inches long, on which o yerd has been
marked of In thirty-six divisions Of an
inch. The greatest possible are is
taken OF these two important articles.
When a comparison is being made
they are handled with tongs. The
pound weight is weighed In the most
delicate OF chemical balances, and the
yard is measured with a micrometer
When they are done with the pound It
Is wrapped in n special soft paper and
laid in a silver gilt case, which is plac-
ed In a bronze case, this being put in a
wooden box, afterward screwed down
and sealed. The yard mcasur is plac-
ed on eight rollers in a mahogany case,
which is carefully sealed. Both cases
are Their put into a leaden casket, which
Is sealed by soldering. The packing IL
not yet finished, however, for the lead
case is placed in a strong oak box
When this is screwed down 1t is placed
in the hole in the wall. The wall is
built up by a mason, and the standards
can only be obtained by demolishlng it
once more.-London Globe.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
a MlnarahIn nrnftar-

'That looks like some crib to crack"
said the FIRST burglar to his pal as they
passed a suburban mansion.
"None o. that for me-" said the pal.
zone Of the biggest g%rafters in the
United States lives there"
How do you know that7" asked the
arst burglar.
II broke in there once and he caught
me wit the goods on" said the pal.
II had to pay him $40 to let me CO.,
Harper's Weekly.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Greek figures Of men appear taller
and more graceful than those Of mod
erns. Modern artists make the upright
figure eve and one-half times the
length Of the head. The Greeks made
1t eight times, lengthening the shin,
and the longer sweep from knee TO heel
gave the figure increased grace and
dignity. The same plan was frequent
ly adopted by Lord Leighton, in whose
paintings the same effect is obtained.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
What Hurt Him.

did you lear about the accident to
BjinksT'
"Why, 40. What ~happenedT
ooh, the darned fool was seriously
hurt this afternoon"
"In his automobile. l ~suppOseP''
"No. that's the trouble"
what do You mean? l know he's a
reckless driver, and
And you think he was hurt In his
ear. Well, he wasn't He was hurt
by a tree about ten feet ahead of the
car. If he'd been able to stay in the
a he'd never have been hurt
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

II hey come to tell yez, Mrs. Malone,
that yer husband met with an acct
dent"
AN what is It nowr' walled Mrs.
Malone.
He wos overcome by the heat
num-
Overcome by the heat. was he7 An
how did It happenT"
"He fell into the furnace at the foun-
dry, mum."-London Telegraph.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
SERIAL OsO77
DEPARTMENT OF THE INTERIOR
United states Land once,
Las Cruces, New Mexico,
February, n, 1913.


NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN that the
state Of New Mexico, under and by virtue Of
the act Of Congress approved June 20, 1910,
has made application for the following do
scribed unappropriated unreserved, and nom
mineral public lands, for the benefit OF the
Santa Fe and Grant County Railroad Bond
FUND.-
All OF Section Q, 7. 80 s.. R. 10 w., N. NJ.
p. NJ,
The purpose of this notice Is 90 allow at
persons claiming the land adversely, or de-
string TO show It to be min raj in character,
an opportunity to file objeet.e. 20 such loo
alton or selection with the Rogisle r and Re-
ceiver Of the United States LAND ONCE, at
Las Cruces, New Mexico. and to establish
their interests therein. or the mineral char
acter Thereof.
JOSE GONZALES
Register.
First publication. Feb. %, 1918.
Last pub, March q, 1918.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Serial Nos. OsO16, OsO22
Department of the Interior.
United States Land Office.
Las Cruces, New Mexico.
Feb. 8, 1913

NOTICE is HEREBY GIVEN that the
State of New Mexico, under and by virtue of
the act of Congress approved June 20, 1910,
has made application for the following-des-
cribed unappropriated, unreserved. and nom
mineral public lands, for the benefit of the
santa Fe and Grant County Railroad Bond
Fund.-
swk NEk, Eh Nwk, Mex swA Section
81. Township 20 s., Range II W, N. NJ. p, N.
Eh NEh, NJ SEA Section % Township 21
s., Range II W., N. M. P. NJ, wy Mex. wy
SEX. VIZ Section 8. all of Section Z, Town
ship "a s., Range 10 W., N. NJ. P NJ.
All of Sections l, 8. 4.9, 10, Il. IL, Township
20 s., Range 20 w, Nm. p. NJ.
The purpose of this notice is to allow all
persons claiming the and adversely, or de-
string to show ii to be IMMORAL in character,
an opportunity TO file objection to such loo
alton or selection with the Register and Re-
ceiver of the United States Laud Office, at
Las Cruces, New Mexico, ana to establish
their interest therein, or the mineral char
acter thereof.
JOSE GONZALES,
Register
First publication Feb. II, 1913,
Last publication March IA. 1918.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Plaanant

Pastor-I hear that the lightning
struck your house, H%ohenbauer. That
Is a punishment for your %wickedness,
Peasant-well. sir, It's a punishment l
wouldn't mind having again, for l got
1000 marks insurance from it--Lustige
Batter.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
NOTICE
NOTICE.
Department OF the Interior.
United States Land Office,
Las Cruces, New Mexico.
Feb. q. 1913.

NOTICE is hereby given hat Sarah G. Jer-
nigan, formerly Sarah @. Chapman. of Rcd
rock. New Mexico, who, on October 20, 1903
made Homestead Entry, No. 037O0, for
M NEh; SEX Mex; Sec. 81, and NwK NwN
Sec. 80 Township IS s, Range 10 W, N p Mer-
idian, has filed notice of intention to make
final three year roof,t to establish claim to the
land above described. before D II. Kedzie, u.
s. Commissioner, at Lordsb Yrg. N. NJ, on the
9Th day of April, 1918.
Claimant names as witnesses;
e. B. thurman, of Bedrock, N. NJ,
Sam Truman, of Redrook. N. NJ,
f. W. Brakeneld, of Bedrock. N, NJ.
Anthony Conner, of Bedrock, N. N.
JOSE GONZALES,
Register.
First publication Feb. 2s, 1913
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

BEG pardon, sir" said the doorman
at the staghorn club. Haven't you
made a mistaken
IL reckon not" replied 81 C~orntassel.
"The sign on the door says NO Admis-
sion,' and II they's no admission it's
free, amt i~tT'-Judge.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Worda MIth a. Tsaohsr.

First Pupil = What makes you so
later Second Pupil-I had words with
the teacher. First Pupil-Yesl Sec
ond Pupl-But I could net spell them,
Judge.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Really Confederate.

els Mrs. Binks considerable Of her
husbands feelingsT'
Eyes. She always airs his overcoat
80 early In the season that his friends
cannot detect the odor Of moth balls
when the frst cold snap eomes."-Buf-
falo Express.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Il always did make a hit with the
women" Dragged Henry VIII.
with your wit, sire?'' murmured the
obsequious courtier.
"No," answered the monarch, with a
sly smile, with an ax"-Baltimore
American.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Kitty-Isn't It a most fortunate thingf
EtheI-whati Kitty-That people can't
read the kisses that have been printed
upon a girls ips.-st Louis Post-Dis-
patch.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
The Obstinate Cook.

Father-Cooking schools are Of some
use after all. This cake is delicious.
Daughter-Is it7 ! thought it would
be a terrible failure. Father-Why?
Daughter told the cook exactly how
10 make 1t, and she went and made It
some other way.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

""Why do you encourage your hus-
band to drink 80 much coffeeT'
TITS the n thing that will keep him
awake nights, and that's the only
chance / get to tell him what l really
think OF himl"-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
Didn't Find IL so.

Wlllie-An the world loves a lover.
Wallie-Bally lie, you know. Nellie dc
Wink's pet terrier has bitten me four
times, bah Jovei-Exchange.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

II you intend to go to work, there is
no place better than where you are. IL
you do not intend to 80 to work, you
cannot get along anywhere.-Abraham
Lincoln.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07
she Was Anticipating.

"Wben he proposed to her she knock
ed him down"
"Graciousl What did he say to that7"
"He yelled HOLD on, hold onl We
amt married yetp "-Houston Post.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

'Unhorsing a rival In the old days OF
ehivalry was very much like a modern
holiday In a busy life"
How sOT'
1T wal taking a knight of."-Balti.
more American.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Does she sing7"
Eyes"
with or withoutT'
"With or without what-her music3v
"No. With or without coaxing."-
Detroit Free Press.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Ones own thistle field Is dearer to
him than bis neighbor's garden Of
rOses.-German Proverb.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

The wise man should be prepared FOR
everything that does not lie within his
cOntroi.-PythagoraG
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Mrs. Crusty do you remember our.
first quarrelI MIR Crusty Let me see.
Vas that going into the church OF
csziEx eSss
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

Remember this-that a very little is
needed to make a happy life.-Marcus
Aureliud.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

samsneRs is the mother Of disgust
variety the eure.-Petrarch.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

well. I know she won't love you
short Baltimore American.
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

First publication Feb. Is, 1913
Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1913-03-07

First publication Feb. Il, 1913,
Last publication March IA. 1913.
Evening journal., 1913-02-07
#R. AND MRs.zEBLEY ENTERTAI,

Mr.. and Mrs. Charles NJ. Zebley en-
tertained at cards at their home No
SIS West Twentieth street last even
ing. Following tire game delight
ful luncheon was served.