The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1913-05-28

got new oatmeal dish. and yesterday
| found 1t with a hole in it."
Did you take pickax and make the
hole? That dish was bought three
months ago and is all right yet. What
you found was the old one. Perhaps
could find you one with two holes in it
if | should look around. Why don't
you say that l burn gas in the day
time to help send You to the poor
house,?
You do, and you know you CO." he
exclaimed.
You had better have your head ex,
amined. Two weeks ago you were 0Tt
to. club when 1 went to bed. / don't
know at what hour you came IN. but
when came downstairs next morning
| found three burners blazing away.
A week ago l went to bed and left you
reading. You followed after an hour
and left three burners Illuminating the
house. Don't talk about wasting gas
to me-
What! l mustn't talk to you. By
thunder. woman, have you gone crazy! :!
Do you know who l ann"
II know you very we'll, SIR said
Mrs. Bowser in answer. "and we are
having a square talk. You were find
ing fault the other day about how fast
the furnace coal went, and you threw
out hint that l must be selling por-
ton of it. Such an idea is nonsense.
and you know it. You alone are to
blame. You come home and dive down
cellar the first thing and shovel quar-
ter of q ton of coal in. You think you
know all about running furnace, but
as matter of fact you know nothing
at all. I want you to keep away from
it for the rest Of the winter
"You-you are talking this to me?"
be asked as he sat down and moistened
his dry lips with his tongue.
"Yes. sir, straight to you. The other
night you found tramp at the door.
and because wouldn't give him any
thing to eat you went on for an hour
about my stony heart. I want to bear
nothing more in that line. Cut off
your cigars and wine and leave the
money in the house to be given out
to tramps. I shall give or not, just as
I elect"
'tBut am telling you'-
"Never mind what you are telling:
You have always meddled more or less
with the help problem. want you to
stop it. know more in minute about
managing a girl than you know in a
year. When I fail with one you may
butt in"
Mrs. 3. Lays Down the Law.
"But you never have any pity for
them. but the cold cash. the same as
you are. We have had FIVE girls quit
rs in the last year. and it was all ow-
ing to your hen hussy ways. Each
one has told me 50. They don't want
and wont have you loAylopping around
the kitchen and telling how sorry you
are that they can't be seated in the
parlor playing on the piano. I say !
want you to quit it!!'
Mr.. Bowser turned us white as snow
and his knees gave way under him Or
he rose up.
"And this finding fault with your
meals has got to come to a sudden
stop.' continued Mrs. BOwser. IF yon
don't like what I provide for the table
give me more money and We'll live on
the rareSt luxurieS. l have only so
much per week to buy with. and if I
spend Il dime extra there is a howl
from You. You mnst cut it out. There
are boarding ho'lSes in plenty down
the street"
"And this is Mrs. Bowser. and she is
talking to me- he gaSped as he looked
at the cat and then around the room
to see if he had possibly made any mis-
take There was 4 moments silence
and then Mrs. BowSer continued:
You were speaking about putting in
two evenings 4 week at your clubs.
You never attend one of them that
you don't come home at least s. worse
off in pocket. and on some occasions
you have dropped as high as 81 at
poker. In the first place YOU don't
know the @amc. and in the next we are
goin" to the theater once per week
during the rest Of the season. You can
cnt out one of your clubs"
He Is Worried.
Mrs. BOwSer." he whispered as he
looked Il bit scared. "and | am Mr.
BOwSer:'
You surely are.
The BowSer who runs things"
NO. sir You are the BOWser whose
wife runs things. There's 4 new deal
on hand. Perhaps YOU had better take
Il walk :llrl think things over. You
look as if your mind was all tied up in
knots"
Mr. BowScr walked down the hill
like one in Il dream and put on his hat
and overcoat. Then he went out and
walked up and down. Men spoke to
him, and boys threw snowballs at him