davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
GLOBE SIGHTS
By THE ATCHIsoN GLOBE.

Then there is the kind of dignity that
drives away trade.
Short jerks: About the only thing
can't resist is temptation
Sometimes a woman is such a bargain
hunter she keeps her husband poor
Baseball is a great game because only
one team can win the worlds series.
No furniture looks like much of ANY,
tmng While taking tour a moving
van.
Sometimes A man steals it and wins
lame as a philanthropist by giving away
the interest.
An Old Sport says it is cheaper to have
chicken for dinner than to take chicken
TO dinner.
A mans wife usually finds fault with
the way he eats, although other people
may not notice it.
The longest vacation is usually taken by
the family Princess, so mother can get a
little rest.
Possibly the calIouses on the young
mans hands We're made by tennis rae
quet instead of a pitchfork-
When an Atchison colored man thinks
he understands he calls his friends around
him and talks loud.
No no, Delphine. it isn't the narrow
skirts which attract so much attention;
it's TIER motive power.
Young couples sometimes make the mis-
take of making the honeymoon trail long
e- than the honeymoon.
Speaking of seif-control, how would YOU
like to play in the church league and not
be allowed to swear at the umpire?
An excuse has great endurance; the
Oldest one. blaming the woman, is still in
use
A young man hasn't much sense of fear,
which is one way to account for war and
football and other unpleasant episodes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
THE CHOSEN

They stood before the Angel at the gate;
The Angel asked: why should you en-
One said: "on earth my place was high
and great
And one: Il warned my felIownen from
SIM
Another: 81 was teacher of the faith;
scorned my life and lived in love with
DEATH
And one stood silent. Speak" the Angel
What earthly deed has sent you here
Alas 1 did but follow where they led"
He answered sadly: Il had lost my
So new the country. and SO strange my
only sought for guidance and for light"
You have no PASSPORT None" the an
swer came.
ct loved the earth, tho lowly was my
stroye to keep my record free from
blame,
And make a heaven about my humble
spot
A narrow life: I see it now. too late:
So, Angel, drive me from the heavenly
The Angel swung the portal wide and
free,
And took the sorrowing stranger by the
Nay. you Alone he said, shall come
with me,
Of ali this waiting and insistent band.
OF what. God gave. you built your
paradise;
Behold your mansion waiting in the
-4lla Wheeler Wilcox, in August
Nautilus.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
by THE WAY
BY HARVEY PARSONS.

As the loaded motorcycle has
proven more deadly than the unload
ed gun. it is hereby moved that the
invasion of Mexico be made with pop
pops. Mexico is too thoroughly IN
habited, as it were, anyway.
The so-called city fathers have
tried the curfew thing on nearly eV-
cry steam whistle in town. AFTER
they try 1T on their piano, comma, 1T
viii have made the rounds.
The mayor, chief and a pair of
cops raided an Awful Joint and cap
tured eight cold ones. Some effort
to net only two bottles each, and
hot night at that, mates, hot night.
No wonder they were pleased with the
raid-and the fact that they didn't
have nine cops instead of two.
As for the EImont gentlemen who
traded wives, we refuse to decide q
bet as to which was stung in the
transaction, as there is no evidence
that either received boot.
Sylvia Spankhurst says the time for
talking has passed, but no one has
seen Sylvia making any mouons TO-
ward the observance of the early
closing regulation.
County officials seem to think that
they have accomplished great Ieal
of agriculture by the hiving of one Bee
Adams at the state apiary, Lansing.
Mayhap the worm will turn, but SO
will the overloaded hammock, ii
stretched too tight.
One of the latest of Europe's (not
nature's) noblemen to be captured in
New York, has been pursued to this
country by a Vienna laundress. Her
claim on the nobleman is indefinite,
and the immigration authorities are
trying to find out whether 1T is
broken heart or a laundry bill.
Maybe the nobleman was in bad In
his own land, and run up an account
with her in an attempt to come
clean"
Social note: Ralph Faxon, profess
siona1 secretary of things, was in our
midst yesterday, but blew through the
office like a Thomas county dust
storm without hesitating in this de-
partment. Hon. FaXon has the finest
collection of non-paying jobs in the
state, the collection of such trinkets
being his favorite fad.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
EVENING CHAT
The Lost Opportunity.
SY EUT1 CAMERON.

Is there any greater mental torture
in the world than to reflect upon a
lost opportunity?
AS one looks back, it sometimes
seems impossible to understand why
one did not seize the golden occasion
and ride. triumphant to success or
happiness on the crest of that high
wave of opportunity.
IF only" we saw reeretfuIly eff
only it were yesterday, or last week
or last year, and I had that chance
once more, how much better L would
use it,
And then we fall to thinking of
the happiness or success that would
have been ours if We had seized the
opportunity, and since VIC cannot pos
sibly know what the drawbacks would
have been, We see what we missed in
thing far better than any success or
happiness We have ever tasted
thoughts like these, which occa-
sionally come to all of us, must nee
essar1ly be very bitter. But there is
one way of making them even more
painful. And that is to hold the idea
that the lost opportunity is the only
one OF the kind, or the only one equal
ly good, which will ever come to u.s.
That is one of the greatest mis-
takes in the world.
No greater lie ever passed into a
proverb than the saying that oppor-
LHAiieJ hIochS Out once at every man s
door. So long as she knows that
there Is real live man within and
not merely the physical shell of a
mental corpse, opportunity never gets
tired of knocking at any mans door.
No proverb is written for the normal
man Each one is aimed at some
folly That one was meant for the
sluggard who let's opportunity after
opportunity slip through his fingers
and doesn't give a hang. 1t was never
meant for the man who now and then
loses an opportunity and tortures him
self when he sees his mistake.
In my own life I have failed to
At first it seemed to me that each
mistake was final, but soon I learned
that II L kept on reaching out for
them and trying to use them properly
fate would give more chances, and
still more. One seldom gets the same
opportunity twice, but this is a big
world and there are other opportuni-
ties just as good as the ones we lose,
even if that doesn't seem possible in
the moment of loss.
Keep alive, keep growing keen
alert, keep on educating yourself and
trying to make yourself valuable to
the world, and life will be one oppor-
tunity after another
And as each opportunity is offered
to you, approach it as if that foolish
proverb were true; but when you lose
an opportunity know that the proverb
is really false. Remember that if Won
are always looking behind You at
gates that have closed, you are sure
to miss some open gates in the pres |
ent.
Look forward, then. and press for
ward, believing ''it is always better |
tiles and optimists will surely be- |
friend you.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
THE PoPEys SWISS GUARDS

That very modern strike in the
medieval Swiss Guard in the Vati-
can is almost as amazing as it might
be to read of a hazing affair in the
College of Cardinals, thinks the New
York World OF all police or mill
tary organizations this body must
hold the record of unbroken service.
The Scots Archers of the French
kings set the middIe-aged fashion of
nonresident body-guards of peculiar
quality. They disappeared in the
Revolution, having lasted only 37S
years. A newer corps of Swiss
Guards it was that, dying in the Tuil-
cries in the cause of Louis XVI, is
commemorated by Thorwaldsen's Lion
of Lucerne in token of its "valor and
fidelity
The Vatican Swiss Guards go back
40S years to a time when the Swiss
were the mercenary troops of Eu-
rope, and when the proverb NO
money, no Swiss was quoted where
wars were planned. The mountain
GERS sought fortune in the field where
now they seek it as hotel walters.
More than money has held the Pope's
Swiss; they come from Catholic fam
lilies in which the service is a hered-
itary pride. Yet now they are strik-
ing because they do not see any sense
in the old drill of shining over the
Vatican roof repelling imaginary enc
mics, and they do want to run out oc-
casionally to the nearby wine-Shops.
Secretary Merry del Vafs reforms of
efficiency and economy displease
them.
The Vatican might not be so pic
turesque If these guards in their an
cient costume We're disbanded, but the
Vatican would still have the Noble
Guard of young Italians for police
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
THE TARIFF AND Business.

The pending tariff changes hurt bus
mess chiefly because nobody knows
when the act is to become law ana
TO go into force, says tie American
Review of Reviews for August. I'm
porters do not dare to buy goods
abroad on the basis of Payne-Aldrich
rates at the custom houses. with the
likelihood of selling them on a market
considerable changed by the adoption
of the Underwood pill. If we could
have been simply assured that the
Payne-Aldrich tariff and revenue sys-
tenn would remain in force until JAM
uary / Cor, what would have been TAR
better and more just, until the end
of the next fiscal year, June 80, 1910
we would have been saved vast
amount of business unrest, and some
hundreds of millions of dollars of act
uaI value in business transactions
Every industry, if it knew that the
Underwood tariff would go into effect
on the first day Of next July, would
have time to study the new rates, in
vestigate competitive conditions at home
and abroad, and prepare deliberately
and cheerfully to meet the situation
And this would not be long time,
but a very short time, in which to ask
manufacturers, merchants, farmers
and other business people to make
changes so great as are those involved
in readjusting their business from the
basis of the Payne-Aldrich tariff to that
of the Underwood tariff. But the
tariff is always in politics"
Most of the objection to. the radical
reduction of rates would disappear if
only there could be a date fixed long
enough ahead to permit business men
to learn the law, and to endeayor to
meet it's requirements. This, after all,
suggests a principal reason why legi-
innate industries have tried to protect
themselves from the atrocities of So
called craftsmanship" at Washing
ton, and have at times resorted to in
defensible methods. American business
is founded upon intelligence, skill. and
economic conditions of intrinsic
strength. 1t will survive any sort of
tariff revision. But other countries
have also great intelligence and skill,
and their business is not placed at such
a disadvantage by ridiculous and alb
rupt changes of governmental policy.
Our nation should take a mighty VOW
that this year shall see the end of rule
of-thumb tariffs. made by politicians
on unscientific ground, and forced upon
the country without being understood
even by those who make them. The
business men of no other country in
the world are subjected to indignities
of this kind. There had to be tariff re-
vision and reduction. But from this
time forth our system of national tax
alton should be studied maturely and
carefully by competent men. and
changed only gradually, with due and
ample notice and without partisan
haste or fractional motive. The taf,tl
commission must follow
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago News.1

GFrom the Chicago News.1
Cruel words seldom cut lazy people to
the quick.
Premature gray hairs cause the good to
dye young.
Take things easy. if they don't belong to
others.
Hero worship is often but another name
for self-esteem.
There's no show for the small boy who
can't get into the circus.
Garbage and love letters should be
burned before they create trouble.
Almost any diplomatic female can teach
man to think he is teaching her.
Satan furnishes his own gasoline when
you permit him to act your chauffeur.
Once in a great while there is a political
boss who gets away with it at home.
Men and women take desperate chances
sometimes-for instance, when they get
married.
1t may ne better to give than to receive.
but few of us are in a position to keep it
up indefinitely.
Many of the worlds great men are I'M
known to fame They are great because
they share their pleasures with others and
Keep their troubles to themselves
The people who live on the top floor of
an apartment house may be pardoned for
looking down on their neighborS-
First Rooster-''what did you say when
she threatened to go home TO her moth
err? Second Rooster-'I just gave her the
laugh You know, she was raised in an
lncuba tor"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
CHINA MUCH REsEr.

The Chinese government has other
troubles than a civil war to perpleX
and burden it's statesmen. The condi-
items on some frontiers of the Chinese
empire are very serious.
Late reports from Mongolia indicate
that the tribesmen of its vast deserts
{ and arid plains have been victorious in
several engagements with Chinese
troops and it is evident that the re-
sources of the Chinese government
will be severely taxed to re-estabfish
Chinese authority in that region. If
China fails to do this Russian inter-
vention may be expected to follow,
with Russian annexation the ultimate
result.
In Tibet, also, there has been bloody
fighting, with the advantage some
times on the side of the Tibetans, and
there, as in Mongolia, it will not be
easy to restore Chinese supremacy.
England, in India, is watching events
in Tibet as closely Russia is taking
note of every movement in Mongolia,
and in Tibet, as in the larger but less
populous land of the Mongols, it is
necessary that the Chinese authorities
shall act with vigor and success.
Such problems and difficulties,
taken in connection with a civil war,
are extremely dangerous to the Picking
government. If President Yuan Shi
Kai can overcome the difficulties with
which he is beset and clear away the
formidable obstacles in his path, he
will be entitled to all the power and
fame China can ever bestow upon him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
AYHAWKER JOTS

1t occurs to the Claflin Clarion that
the. only thing nicer than a pretty
girl is one with good sense.
From the Burr Oak Herald: The
proprietor of a business says: 1--WE
haven't any, but the clerks say, IT,
Either the Knockers or the car
penters are busy at Santa Fe. The
Monitor of that place reports: The
sound of the hammer is heard in our
town.
Religion is free. observes the Viii
lage Deacon of the Osborne County
Farmer. and he adds: If it wasn't
some people wouldn't have so all
fired much of it.
Naturally, suggests the Salina
Union, there can't be much to that
harmony movement when each side
insists on playing a different melody
in a different key at the same time.
The mean, old Walnut Valley Times
remarks: There are some women
hereabouts who will never have a de-
sire to wear q slit skirt-no matter
how fashionable it may become Vari-
Gus reasons.
Local Improvement note, in the
Usage City Free Press: J. A. Lund-
stadt' who is II years of age, and has
been wearing full beard, had his
Whlskers cut off the other day and
very few of his neighbors and friends
recognize him.
Jimmy Riglet is one wise boy He
is quoted by the Arkansas CITY Tray-
eler as saying that he is inclined to
think that the girl who can make
good biscuits will make a better help
mate than the girl who can make good
fudge
An Emporia girl, says the Gazette.
met friend the other day and said,
Why weren't you at the party last
night" The friend replied, "Oh,
had a dreadful accident [ sat on
the lawn and a mosquito bit me, and
could not get my new skirt on over
the bite
In spite of all the abuse and curses
being heaped upon Old Soils head he
comes up bright and smiling every
morn just as though he were the most
popular young sport on deck. And
although we would like to shake His
Royal Holiness for about ten days, we
must hand it to him for being the
most persistent and consistent optim-
list of us all.-Atchison Champion.
A young lady recently visited the
Central Branch shops and asked
number of questions, states the Atch-
lson Globe. What are those large
iron things?" she asked Jack began.
Those are locomotive boilers he re-
piled. What do they boil locomo-
tives for?'' she asked, and Mr.: began
replied: ITO make the engine tender
We will now visit the round house.
which was built by an architect who
lost his square,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
QUAKER MEDITATTONS
[From the Philadelphia Record

[From the Philadelphia Record1
The sun always has time to burn
TIE role all actors are fond of is the
payroll.
The man who never swears may still
give a cursory glance.
Many self-made man is made over
again after he marries.
Even sword swallower may need a
tonic to sharpen his appetite.
A woman is not necessarily bandit
because she holds up train.
When a weather prophet bets on his
predictions it is often case of prophet
and loss
1t is better for a girl to have too many
strings to her beau than too many beaux
to her string
Some people are So busy talking about
themselves that they haven't time to run
other people down.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
FROM OTHER PENS
VALUE OF A VACATION.

VALUE OF A VACATION
The accredited maxims all spur men to
labor. The books are full of illustrious
examples of the value of incessant toll.
What we need is more of the gospel Of
rest. Interest in work, the desire to be
constantly doing, love of industry for its
own sake, or for its rewards, keep many
restlessly busy until nature calls halt,
and the man of ceaseless activity wears
out and retires from the active scene.
Yes, it better to wear out than rust
OUT" but a stop now and then for oiling
up lessons both the wear and the rust.
labors. too, that destroy life. The prudent
man will see to it that sufficient time is
allotted every day and every year to rest
and rational enjoyment that is recreative
and life-giVing. Stevenson wrote a gentle
satire, containing much shrewd wisdom,
entitled AN Apology for Idlers." in
which he says among other equally good
things: Perpetual devotion to what
man calls his business is only to be sus-
tanned by perpetual neglect of many 9TH
err things. And it is not by any means
certain that mans business is the most
important thing he has to do. To an
impartial estimate it will seem clear
that many of the wisest most virtuous
upon the theater of life are filled by gra-
tutous performers, and pass among the
world phases of idleness." 1t is re-
freshing to listen now and then to so
distinguished an apologist and exemplar
of idleneSs. Amusement is an important
part of education. Relaxation is one of
the main duties of life. Recreation is not
wasting time, but economizing life
Memphis News-Scimtar.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
Couldn't Play at All.

Knickerbockered and Respondent in daz-
cling tartan stockings, Algernon sauntered
from the club house to the golf links and
there, On the first tee, having carefully
adjusted his monocle and addressed the
ball for a prodigious length of time, be-
gan his game.
BY the way caddie,' he remarked
presently, what sort of a game does MIR.
McJones playa
The diminutive young Scotsman screwed
up his weather-beaten face
Mr.. McJones? He Gamma play at ALL
tAh,'' said Alge-non- You see, I'm
playing match with him tomorrow.
Suppose shall beat him easily-what?"
The caddie shook his head wisely.
Ma he replied; that We will not
Answers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
JOURNAL ENTRIES

A woman's complexion these days is
generally what she makes il.
+ + =
Gossip would cease to be interesting
were it confined to facts.
4. = j.
Neither can you convince a man
who loses a lawsuit that right is sure
to prevail
j. T. d
Another old-fashioned myth concern
ed the grocer who used to put sand in
his sugar.
= j. j.
What man saves on the cost of liv
ing by loss of appetite, he has to pay
out to the doctor.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
ON TEE SPUR
or The NOMENT
BY ROY K. MOULTON.
Memories.
K. MOULTON.

/ remember, / remember,
When people went on hikes,
On pleasant Sunday afternoons.
Or rode those high-wheeled bikes.
/ remember, I remember,
When people danced quadrilles
nd had no sort of longing
For Texas-tommy thrills.
I remember, 1 remember.
The good old chestnut bell,
Which jingled whene'er someone
Had ancient jokes to tell
/ remember, I remember,
When ii was a disgrace
To seek divorce, and was
Reflection on the race.
1 remember. I remember,
The day of small expense,
When gasoline was selling
AS low as thirteen cents.
I remember, I remember
1t seems far back to me.
A quarters worth of beefsteak
Would feed a family.
i remember, / remember.
The half ] have not told,
L cannot dodge the issue,
l must be growing old.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
HOME NEW WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers of the State Journal
away from home during the summer
may have the paper mailed regularly
each day to any address at TIE rae
of ten Cents a week or thirty cents
a month (by mali only. Address
changed as often as desired. WINE
out of town the State Journal viii ne
to you like daily letter from nome
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

Apparently the Democratic states
mon are considerably worried over the
effect that will be produced by the
tariff law they are framing. They are
now accusing Republican senators Of
"coloring" their speeches against the
Underwood-S bill for the pur-
pose of starting a business panic.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

There is nothing unreasonable in the
assumption that a few of the chautau-
quas which have been advertising Mr..
Bryan as their chief attraction have
as big a grudge against Mexico as he
hn
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

Possibly, the s15,OOO,OOO that the
government is going to spend to make
a physical valuation of the railroads
could be used to much better advant-
age in building a government railroad
in Alaska
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

Considering the severe drouths in
other sections, that big storm which
hit Washington the other night also
gives a black eye to the theory that
the rain falls alike on the just and the
1lniIrSt
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

No wonder Kansans are generally
optimistic despite the drouth that is
working overtime. The property valu-
ations in the state approximate 49,
900, 900, 900, which is per capita
wealth of about $17O0
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

duty. AS for exterior enemies in
arms, a real peril in Pope Sulius's
time, the Italian government would
have to be reckoned with. Eighty
nutinous Swiss would not be of much
use.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02

Nat Goodwin has greatly enhanced
his reputation as a gentleman of dis
erection. He was asked by a reporter
which of his numerous wives is dear
est to him. and he replied, ''the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1913-08-02
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The state journal is a member Of the
Aesocisted Press and receives the full day
feJegrapn report of thar great news NJ
xanizat7on for the exclusive afternoon
pubffcetion in Topeka
The news Is received in The state Jour
nal building over wires for this sole psm-
posA