New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1913-02-02
1.-THE NAME,
pT,FASE?''
nv GEORGE BUCHANAN FIFE

,o mart If all is that he is still trying II has
come TO be an obsession with him. this struggle with lic
telephone and the alien ear at the dstaS eti INV,
determined that he will not be flser nor SISTER 10 any
hodv He will be Sitter, if it takes HIM all day
dts such a simple name, Sitter, he explains IN
search of sympathy and he always spells 1t to uphou
himself "Once to make 1t pam anu 70 ~ ny t
and number for CALL | said Flour Sitter over ihe
telenhone and the miserable girl at the other end
what do YOU think she replied? She smiled and sad
Yes indeed and III call up Mr. Fish at the Aquarium
and Mr. Wolf at the 100 GOOD NIL 81 cortord;no
against the inevitable swearing at the telephone no"
and then; but always convinced that the person d. t
other end of the wire IS nincohipooP, Deoau'o "
could be palmer than Sitter, Sitter! History RECORDS
onI, one instance of legionarys triumph over Fate
II was this mans CUSTOM when the far-away operator
made clear her inability to put his name togetnfi rom
the vowes and consonants he repeatedly SuPPlGu, ~
cav in a firm if weary voice. "Oh just tell Mr. BLANK
that the King of England wishes to speak to MN.
Natural human curiosity made great success OIL ti'
TT NAV be contended by those whose patronymics I'M
1 pose no such burdens that the telephone, or MT
Sfer's cnunciation, or the dear young lady ear Is
measrablv to blame The answer to this may be touid
in the dialogue to be overheard any day III any large
store The dramatis persona are man ldtno ~
either sex is adapted the roc and saleswoman (the
feminine selected by of her numerical superiority
in such an establishment and the place any one OF the
busy counters .,.
home The salcswoman has produced her elaborate
sacspad with its long, uterng pages ITS carbon paper
and other paraphcrnaa. Also she has drawn pcnch
from her back hair and moistencd IT. lhereupon' 'te
sacswoman beginning 1t, the tragi-cornedy proceeds
somewhat after this fashion:
snow" and this is where the plot thckenS, VIII you
please give me the name and address;
"G. \. Jennings, fourteen twenty-one West Ninety
seventhst. n....:.
"Yes, City ,r ,
The Young woman writes the address first. That S
easy: besides it the last part given to her. one
writes East; then reverSes the pencil ana ruoS II
@You said West didn't YOU"
The man mods and makes affirmative noise through
his nose. ~
"G. y. Jennings. Careful separation ol 'yl'''e'
The saIeswoman. bending studously the pad,
writes l. A." and is Just making the G tor Jennings
when the interrupts
Jennings with =
oh vcs-cxcusc me"
She rbs out the c. and then turns the pages ana tries
20 erase the smear the carbon paper has lett on her o"
-Ic.n.n-i-n-g-s" This is the man trying to be help
With smile and with the CELEBRITY that comes Of much
confidence the young writes Jennings ana starts
to tear the page from the pad. But again the man IN
nuatcs himself into the action. 1t is not his first eX-
periencc.
For q moment she looks at her writing IS II she
doubted the omission or perhaps If she expected TO
find the hiding somewhere on the page Then with
something of resignation She rubs away at the name and
succeeds in reducing the "E y NJ G. to FUZZY
blur.
As the name has been pronounced and spelled, the
goddess behind the counter dsdains 70 ask again She
is sure she'll get il this time pressing very hard
upon the pencil TO countersnk the writing in the gray
blur she dashcs off "Jncnings
Nv this time the man realizes that the name writing
has become game sort Of cachas-catch-can contest,
with himself rs referee. And so far Jennings has
scored two falls on the lady.
The referee wonders for a moment whether 70 stop
the bout; but entering quite into the spirit OF II, de-
crmincs 10 let it go 10 third fall at any rate So "ith
4 4. il L. II. r.-. II