davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
SENATOR NORRIS LITTLE MISTAKE

This is a tale of how Senator Geo.
w. Norris of Nebraska was almost
arrested. He had been senator but
little over month"; having graduated
from the house of representatives,
which pedigree explains his crime.
The senator was standing on a
corner in Washington, thinking OF the
day when he led the fight in the
house to overthrow Cannonism, when
a car hove into view. He took 1t.
When the car reached the Peace
monument it turned to the right and
landed the musing senator on the
house side. He got off, strolled into
the office building, still in a trance,
walked down the corridor to room
PA, opened the door Of that room
and mechanically hung up his hat.
An exclamation followed from a
stenographel who didn't look exactly
familiar Senator Norris glanced up
in an annoyed >:ay. and of sudden
began to realize that the furniture of
the room had changed over night.
Then, and only then, did the statesma
senate Office building and walking un'
any suite he had returned to the OLD
and taken possession.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
P0STOFFICE AS DETECTIVE

Detectives, lawyers, clerks and
others often experience great difficulty
in obtaining an undoubted specimen
of a certain persons signature. In
one case recourse had to be had to a
marriage register; in another the only
signature procurable was on the fly
leaf of a book which the suspect had
presented to a relative; and only two
or three years ago testimonial to a
sea captain was brought into court,
because among the signatures to it
was one for which the police had long
hunted in vain.
One of the most common expedients
resorted to for overcoming this diff
Guilty is employing the postoffice-that
is, sending a registered letter to the
person whose signature is wanted. And
this is frequently successful Think
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
ANIMALS THAT GET SEASlCK

The recent dispatch from England
to British Columbia of typical Eng"
lish song birds and insect destroyers,
like robins and larks, reminds one
that birds generally are uncommonly
good ocean travellers. This character
istic, however, does not apply to ami
mails, for the only beast that takes
kindly to a sea Journey is the polar
bear, who has been described as being
quite gay" on board ship. But hear-
ly all other animals violently resent
a trip on the water and express their
dislike with great determination. The
tiger suffers most of all. He whines
pitifully. and his eyes water contin-
ually. Horses are very bad sailors.
Elephants do not like the sea, but
they are wonderfully amenable to
medical treatment. A good and popu-
lar remedy for elephant seasickncss is
a bucketful of fresh water containing
three and half pints of whisky and
seven ounces of quinine.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

institution
a moreef n time 0
which make
The will with the enlisted
position
drudgery
Within time for system of training both
training enlisted will
follow particular bent looking establishing themselves
profession
will be which them will
possible select
which
civil craftsmanship engineering
architecture studies of like
these service in the will be
stepping these for the future"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
PRICED RELIC OF COLUMBUS
ASeient Ceiba Tree Which Sheltered
Him on His First Voyage
Of Discovery.

Santo Domingo City.-On the river
bank at Santo Domingo City, capital
of the Dominican Republic, below the
ruined city wall stands the ancient
Ceiba tree to which Christopher CO.
lumbus tied his water-logged and
sinking caravels when he sought
refuge in the river on his first voy-
age of discovery. This tree, already
more than a century old when the
discoverer landed, bears imbedded in,
Its bark a leaden plate inscribed and
placed there by Columbus, claiming
the country for the king of Spain.
On the heights above is the venerable
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
HEN MOTHERS ELEVEN PIGS

James Lafferty, farmer near New
ark, N. j., has hen that is mothering
eleven little pigs. Several weeks ago
the hen began laying eggs in the pig
pen. The mother pig ate the eggs
regularly until her litter arrived. Then
she ceased and gave her attention to
the new family. The hen continued
to make the pen her roosting place.
Finally the little porkers made such
friends with her that the fowl gave
up her plans to hatch brood and
adopted the little pigs. She allowed
the juvenile porkers to eat the eggs
that she had in her nest. Now, when
ever she clucks the little pigs scam
per to her. The mother pig doesn't
appear to mind it.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
WIFE SOLD FOR HALF CROWN

From time to time cases in the po-
lice court show that there is still a
belief, especially among the English
Golfers, that a man may legally sell
his WIFE Formerly the error was
widespread among the lower classes
in Lancashire, it being thought to be
a purely legal transaction if the wife
was tlke1 to the place of sale with a
halter round her neck, and the buyer
was given a written receipt by the
husband for the money paid. Quite
late in the nineteenth century man
pleaded in a Lancashire county court
that he was not liable for his wifes
debts, as he had sold her to another
man for half crown long before the
debts in question were contracted.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

ing that the postal packet contains
money or valuables, the addressee un-
suspectingly signs the receipt, only to
discover that inside the envelope there
is nothing but faxed" letter.
This trap once caught an anonymous
letter writer-a woman-who, on being
Intercepted shortly before, had de-
clared tn 1T she could not write, and
whose frithds believed her to be illit-
crate. 1t was, in fact, mainly instru-
mental in getting her six months i'm
prisonment.
The receipt of registered letter. it
should be carefully noted, is not given
Up to anybody, but can be obtained
only in certain cases to further the
ends of justice.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
WOULD MAKE NAVY FLOATING SCHOOL

Every battleshlp a floating COLI
lege."
This is the aim of Josephus Dam
iels, secretary of the navy, as out
lined by him before leaving on tour
of inspection of navy yards. training
stations and equipment on the Pacific
coast.
The secretary proposes to convert
every battleship and training station
into a school where enlisted men
will receive three hours daily instruc-
ton under graduates of Annapolis.
Besides making enlisted service more
attrt~tive, Secretary Daniels says
this new plan will offer to evo~HJ'
young American an opportunity to
receive a minor college education at
the same time that he is serving
Uncle Sam. 1t will offer chance to
young men to fit themselves for a.
trade or a profession, so that when.
their enlistment is ended they may.
become useful citizens.
o4Irc xr,Ordo CoorO4arv DonipIc'
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
AS HIS CONSTITUENT SAW 1T

Representative Phil" Campbell OF
Kansas is the proud father OF a
young daughter who likes unusual
pets. In her. young life she has Law
ished affections on all sorts Of queer
pets, her latest acquisition being a
chameleon-one Of those tiny reptiles
which assume the color of any artl-
Gle on which they are placed. The
chameleon has tiny gold chain
about it's neck, and at the other END
of the chain is a pin, that it may be
attached to ones waist
Not long ago one of Campbelrs
constituents, a. cattle dealer, with
scarcely an interest in the world out
side of livestock, came to Washing
ton and called at the Campbell home,
Mrs. Campbell was out, and Campbell
himself was in the tub at the time,
so the young daughter, with the
chameleon pinned to her waist,
marched into the parlor to entertain
the visitor.
Conversation went along fairly
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
LASSOOED BY FLYING TRAIN

John Dunning, a railway mail clerk,
of Corona was whipped out Of the
door of a mail car by wire lasso,
hurled against a passing freight train
and dragged along the ties till the
wire broke. AS the train was stand
ing at the Floral Park switch to let
the freight pass he stood at the side
door From car in the freight train
a long wire was trailing. AS it passed
the mail car the free end snapped into
the open door and wound about Dun
nings left leg.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
canai-z Bird a nWiId Beast

New York.-Magistrate MacAdoo
classed canary with wild beasts"
when he told Jacob Sandrack that no
one can legally claim ownership to a
wild bird or animal at large. Sand
rack applied for permit to search the
rooms of a neighbor who refused to
return the bird when 1t flew into the
place.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

In the Pacific northwest of the Unit
ed States the conifers grow TO giant
size. Whole forests are being lum-
bered where the trees range in dame
ter from five to eight feet with clean
trunks. bare of limbs for 100 to 125
feet in height. The illustration shows
a huge arbor vitae (Thuja plicata) on
a roadside near Snohomish, Wash,
which is 80 feet nine inches in circum-
ference Through the tree pathway
has been cut and beneath its arch
thousands of pedestrians and bicy-
clists nave passed.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
SECRETARY TUMULTY NOW LID.

Secretary Tumulty now thinks the
president has nothing on him, for
recently st. Peters college, an insti-
tuition somewhere in New Jersey,
made Mr.. Tumulty an LID.
The presidents secretary returned
to Washington And was at his desk
as usual, unruffled by his new honors
and degree. He was at his office
early and was sitting at his desk,
while nearby and watching him was
a politician from Trenton, N. ]. This
gentleman had been a frequent visi-
tor on Mr. Tumulty, for he wanted a
good job under the government Mr..
Tumulty was going over his mail and
the gent from Trenton was watching.
hoping someone had resigned and
that he could get the place, when the
president, having come to his office
from the White House, walked into
Mr. Tumulty's Office.
Good morning, DOCTOR" was the
presidents greeting to his faithful
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

Seville svIa
magnificent tomb
he
at in
Santa Domingo In His
of the the monument with It's accompany
America
which
of
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

politician, however
walked over
ands Ihearth president doctor?
a doctor?" the politician
e Tumuly
I've an pain
n my
while ana tnen saio'
long walk
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

constituent noticed
minute ne was SILENT
demanded:
Where on that thing?"
young troked the chameeons back with
"Oh." bought It,"
for
Then he leaned far over in MS
earnestly tell How much is lizards head
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
Blue And
DISCOURAGED
Mrs. Hamilton Tells How She
Finally Found Health in
Lydia E. Pinkhan's Veg.
etable Compound.
Warren. Ind. -'T was bothered ter
ribly with female weakness. 1 had pains

ana was not regular,
my head ached all
the time,I had bear
ing down pains and
my back hurt me the
biggest part of the
time, I was dizzy
and had weak feel
ings when 1 would
stoop over, it hurt
me to walk any dis
lance and L felt blue
and discouraged.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
Has Tested Himself.

Smoking again? l thought you'd
cut it out"
well. you see, when I've convinced
myself that can cut it out whenever
I want l start smoking again"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
Into Town, Out of Money.

Mrs. Subbubs (entering husbands
cfflce)-I ran into town today to do
some shopping, dear, and I
Subbubs-I see, and you ran in
here because you ran out of money
Well how much?
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

Ell began taking Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound and am now in
good health. If it had not been for
that medicine I would have been in my
grave long time ago. Mrs. ARTIE E.
HAMILTON, RID. No. 6. Warren, Ind.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

Mrs.Winslows Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces infiamma-
tion, allays pain, cures wind colic.25e bottleAM
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14
Another Case.

Esmond, r. Ter write to tell you
how much good your medicine has done
me and to let other women know that
there is help for them. I suffered with
bearing down pains, headache, was ir-
regular and felt blue and depressed all
the time. L took Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound and commenced to
gain in short time and 1 am a we'll wo-
man today. I am on my feet from early
morning until late at night running q
boarding house and do all my own work.
/ hope that many suffering women will
try your medicine. It makes happier
wives and mothers. Mrs. ANNA HAN.
SEN, Esmond, Rhode Island.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

Two is company, but three is null
titude when father butts in.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1913-08-14

Luck may be merely case Of not
being found out
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01
Voice Of the eople
'fhc Riddles Lament Over Denny
Duticr.
Denny ButIcr's dcnl thov 80,

The Riddles Lament over Denny
Butier.
penny eh Cutters dead. they say,
Alu ne never more will play
With the kiddics whom he loved 50
very much;
0 lna they they gathered at his home,
Aiiu ned take them for+, roam
through the forests fields and hill
gap glen and guich.
Think the things Denny would do
me rough places all along life's
re re %aS always h2ppy when
And lead crowd of us Young falI.,.
on the hike.
II comes up TO make us sad
Bout the bully times we had
swimming boxing, boating and the
sports well done:
But he's crossed the stvN for pood
He'd have stayed here if he c eUId
i0r nothing else to help us kids
Denny Butler. you were kind.
And we never spect TO find
anybody on earth like you any more;
w nen we cross the Rivers side
You'll be waiting for us feliers hv
the shore, W
And you'll take us maybe where
Higher mountains rise in air;
Walk us over pavements made Of
purest. gold;
Where the crystal river flows.
And LIES tree forever grows.
Where none of the people ever more
grow old.
That is at the Mission Home"
We've been told that where vou've
gone
All is fair and fragrant as verdant
vale:
And all good folks go there straight
THAT'S the reason why old mate.
We're so sure that Denny Rut,ar.s
struck the trail
REV. D. H. KENNEY.
2020 Poplar Street, Philadelphia. Pa
April IS, 1919. o.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01
Ionnnese Good citizens.

To the Editor of The Times Dispatch:
Sir.--I wish to commend the excel
lent report Of an interview with pr;
Teusler, and the very sane editorial
comment thereon, which appeared in a
recent issue of your paper. While l
have not been In Japan as long as DR..
Teusler has / have bcen there long
enough, and have had opportunities
enough for observation while there, to
be able to confirm all that he says. j
wish to direct your attention to the
striking contrast between the uni
formly conservative and conciliatory
utterances of those WHO have been In
Japan and are competent to form q
just opinion--and especially of promi-
ncnt Japanese themsclves--and the
stupid, incendiary declarations of fire.
eating politicians and yellow jour
nalists who are willing to sacrifice de-
cency, to insult people who merit
our highest respect. and TO run the risk
of involving our country in war. mere
ly to satisfy their morbid craving for
sensationalism
we boast OF our. superior civiliSa-
ton and our Christian principles, but
does ii not seem that the digniiied
bearing OF the Japanese in this whole
affair has been vastly more to their
credit than the hysterical performances
OF our sister state in the far West
have been TO hers?
Not only have i been In japan long
enough to have some appreciation OF
the Japanese temper and characterize
tics and to form many warm and valued
personal Friendships among them. but
during recent brief stay in Cali
fornia | made n number of acquaint-
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01

vet so comprehensive and truthful that
venture to ask you to have ii rcpub-
lished in your Sunday edition. that ii
may have greater publicity, If, in your
opinion, it would be proper to do so
Very truly yours.
JOHN h. LAUGFTON. JR
We take pleasure in complying with
the above request:
a VOICE FROM HOLLY WOOD.
dor the Dispatcl)
We sleep; so let them come,
The field that once they He'd
Let them triumphant trcad;
And DER each grave
Their banners wave:
And beat the drum;
Such welcome as of yore
They find, alas! no more.
For we are dumb!
JOHN L. rABB
The Forest" Amelia County, August
10, 1897,
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01

=, Chicago paper headlines "Amundsen
round south Pole in Undershirt" Huh.
when Peary found the North Pole it
had nothing on at all
lnat horseradish trust ought TO be
about as strong as any of them.
one Eastern man claims he can sing
300 songs. but he knows perfectly
wen that nobody will listen long
enough 10 let him prove il.
The electoral college will never he
-to-date and will never attract much
attention until it has a football team.
Mrs. Woodrow Wilson can make ex-
ceilent cake but what the Democratic
ONCE seekers are interested in is pie
Or; woods Hutchinson recommends
the hard boiled egg as !; food This
should interest the millionaires. but
let MIN discover something for the
poor folks as we'll
William Rockefeller may he speech-
less the rest of his life, but ii must be
rcmcmbered that money talks
No man looks more like n saint i'm
the the, eyes Of the neighbors than the ono
VINO mas all the snow off his walk by q
O'Clock in the morning
Beriin has doubled the tax on dach-
shunds, which is all right. as dash
shunds take up nearly twice as much
room as other dogs, having a much
longer wheelbase.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01
The Sewer,


written for The Times Dispatch.
out OF the dreamland came Il song. out
of the shadowy land
message from the wisdom there, the
Reckoning OF n hand,
AS though upon the. eventide was
OF rest and refuge from the world
which unto us is given.
For all the ardor of soul that reso-
lutely fares
Along the way that often means q
multitude OF cares
Nav thus grow weary Of a world
where 1t is seldom known
How that the sowcr sows himself in
every field that's sown
often giving DER
The goal that seems to swiftly flee
forever on before.
We fain would hearken to the hope
which tells to thee and me
The wonder of the land that lies be-
yond the mystery,
So [ arose TO listen to the message
sent of heaven;
And lifted reverent eyes unto the holy
vision given
Ere yet the day of labor IN the morn
ing light begun
Had waned In welcome twilight to the
setting of the sun
1t was that love and labor Is the
alchemy of old;
And he who would the Roblest harvest
of world unfold
Should to the waiting of his times the
mystery make known
That he who sows must SOW himself
BENJAMIN c. MOOMAW.
Savannah Va.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01
ARE YOU SURE YOU COUP NOT
GET II IN RICHMOND.

If You buy what YOU need in the
city YOU live In. you help build that
city That fact is just now being i'm
pressed upon the people OF FredericlSs-
burg by the Free Lance which urges
them to buy the product of new shoe
company just organized there. The
business men of the place have CO.
operated in establishing the enterprise,
and now tho people of the community
must add their support The Free
Lance says that the slogan of the city
must be. Are you sure YOU could not
get it in fredericksburg Richmond
has the same lesson to learn. espe-
cially in the case OF products manu-
featured here. When about to make
your purchase in some other commu-
nifty, ask yourself Are YOU sure you
cannot buy ii in Richmond?
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01

action for recovery or the estate. The
great values were in the hands or,
banks and rich institutions able 10.
night desperately for their spoiis, and
Burr at first avoided these and brought
suit for 81 small farm in the upper
part OF the island. with the hope or
establishing the principle on which
the later actions were to depend The
holder OF the farm had II suggested to
him that IL lac would not seriously
contest the suit, he might repossess
himself OF the land on his own terms.
and Bur- won his cause. which was
then appealed and Burr won again.
Then the Assyrians came down. The,
holders OF the valuable city property
were assailed and terrified by every
sort OF writ OF cjectment and suit to
account and action for trespass that
the ingenious Burr could devise. and
ny compromise and legal decision, he
secured for the younger Eden, and or
course. for himself, a very largo mart.
OF the old estate.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1913-05-01
controlis a kind of fairy story ali in

control,is kind OF fairy story all in
itself,
After all though. 1t is the man in the
gang that does the hard work. and
no had not been neglected by the fell
low up top who gets paid for his brains
10 most people u shovel is shovel,
and that's all, but efficiency demands
scientific shoveiing. One engineer
found that the right load for each
shovelfnl was twenty-one pounds. He
designed what is called the twenty
one pound road shovel" II nts the
work and the man, and gang OF GOO
shovelers triplcd their days work by
using this brainbuilt tool
The lay mind cannot make head or
tail Of the more complex machines Of
fered. but these specimens maintain
the point we began with the rail
roads arc not run by brute strength,
but by imagination, inventiveness and
brains