davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

Henry Morgenthau, who has been free.
ly mentioned for Secretary of the Treas
ury is in the realty business at LOG Broad
way, New York. He had charge of the
financial end Of the democratic campaign
Congressman palmer seems, however, a
more probable choice for Secretary o.
the Treasury.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
HOW TIT UAppENED

HOW TT HAPPENED.
How does it happen. sir, that I find
~ daughter sitting in your lap?"
ITO tell the truth, colonel, we failed
0 hear your step in the hall"
DON'T FOLLOW SUIT
Mortal when
The skies are blue,
Don't let that
Be said of you!
ENVY.
He's seldom in
A pious mood,
Whose daily fare
Is breakfast food.
Especially
If it should hap
That near by sits
A low -browed chap
Who ever and
Anon doth take
Huge mouthfuls of
A juicy steak.
-Birmingham Age Herald
And yet the man
Who eats the meat
Is not puffed up
About the feat,
Especially
If he should hap
To see close by
Another chap
An idle-rich
Who paid q buck
For one small portion
OF a duck.
-Jonrstown Democrat.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The police "dragnets" after spectacu-
lar crime has neen committed never bring
10 light any one who had anything to 10
with the specific crime
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
STATE PRESS
A Word to the Wise

From the Dadeville Spot Cash.
In Birmingham hereafter il a man inn
bibes to the extent that his feet wabble
and his tongue wags he must keep off
the streets or be locked up.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The United States supreme court has
decided that Chicago has the power to fix
the weight of loaf of bread. Birming-
hams police powers are as broad as Chi
Cages. every bit.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
AGGRIEvED.

There was man III our town
Who dearly liked to gamble,
But when the cops came swooping
down,
And players gan to scramble,
This good old sport was heard to say,
II think it is a shame, sir,
For p'licemen to butt in this way
And spoil our little game. sir
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
ADRIFT WITH THE TINES

was told after a recent survey that she
was now a resident of Kansas City,
han-' whereupon she exclaimed joy
tuily' Good There are so many bur-
giaries and hold-ups in Kansas City,
Mo-, that I really have not had a good
nights rest this winters-Kansas City
Star.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The peeresses looked on when the house
of lords rejected the Irish home rule bill,
but the commons will do the real work in
the spring of 1914
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The Chinese propose to cut their alpha
bet from one of 5000 characters to one of
only 42 letters. This will be stupendous
task in so populous a country.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

listers opposition to home rule is not
fierce, for its parliamentary representa-
ton now stands II for to 16 against the
policy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The so American immortals have been
asked to explain to 50 still greater Amer
lean immortals why the latter We're left
off the list.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Proud of Birmingham

From the Iineville Headlight.
Birmingham is the pride of all Alabama.
In the Magic City giant strides are be-
ing made along all lines of human en-
6eavor.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The split iniinitive led to q discussion
between Senator Lodge, purist, and Sena-
tor Cummins, who is merely progressive,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
From the New York Telegram.

From the New York Telegram.
"HICAGO-G. A. Iorensen, travel
= ling salesman, declares that his
- books show that he has given s1s,-
600 in tips in the twenty years he has
travelled.
Absurd, isn't it? About $3.50 day for
tips.
Ever travel on the road? No? up,
Good at figures? Yes. That's fine. Listen:
You're on the road for a first class
house and making your towns as quickly
as you can. If you're on the train you
have to tip the Pullman porter and the
waiter if you get meal, and that makes
a hole in so cents, doesn't it?
Striking your city you've got to tip your
porter both at the train and the hotel
or you never would get your hand grip
or sample cases, and once you have
shaken hands with the hotel clerk it's tip
all the time, elevator boy, bellboy, cham
bermaid, to say nothing of the waiter who
brings you your three meals a day, and
if you are entertaining customers, there's
a bit of late supper after the show and
some more tipping. The telephone girl,
too, who is indispensable in keeping track
of your calls while you are out, usually
falls heiress to a box of candy or a
brace of show tickets or something once
In a while and probably we have over
looked some few things, such as the bar
ber the hat check boy, the brush boy
and the bootblack
Mr.. Lorensen itenizes his tips during
"a hour trip from Chisago to Milwaukee
and back. as follows:
To porter who handles trunk in
Chicago rs
To porter handling grip at depot. 10
To parlor car porter ................... .25
Bell boy who takes guest to room... 10
Porter who handles trunk ........... .25
Head porter (on leaving) ............. %
Tips for three meals (average) ..... As
Barber OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. 10
Boy who brushes coat in barber shop .O5
Boy who takes clothes to presser -. 10
1ottll ..............-.'.-. si-0V
This is in the middle west. What 1t IS
in the east can be estimated.
The Commercial traveller" who peddes
soap and rat traps from a gripsack at
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
AFTER THE DRUMMER'S ROLL

Maybe sousa had something of the sort
in mind when he wrcte:-
He was a soldier Off to the war.
She was a sweet young soul;
She sang of love and he of glory,
And together they told the same old story.
After the drummers roll, my lad.
After the drummer's roll.
After the drummer's roll" all right,
every minute of the day.
A few months ago the commercial trav-
elers,, in convention assembled. decided
TO cut out tipping, but the scheme died
a-bornin'.
Now North Carolna's lower house has
passed an antj-tlpping bill making both
those who give tips and those who re-
ceive them in hotels. cafes, dining and
sleeping cars liable to a fine.
II this becomes law it will be worth
watching.
Meanwhile the feeding of the itching
palm will continue.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The worlds greatest athlete has joined
the Giants and Mr.. McGraw is undoubt-
ed-y CHESTER than he ever has been.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

Both mules and horses are increasing il
number and value, and the automobile
still has a big task before 1t.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

Mrs. Pankhurst wants London made
impossible for males. She is working
straight with that in view
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

This Is In the middle west What It IS
in the east can be estimated.
The Commercial traveller" who peddes
soap and rat traps from gripsack at
your kitchen door may get along with
less. but the real thing on the road. who
tells stories, sells goods and gets results.
fights hard for his rights and his terri
tory and will split his bank roll fifty
fifty with friend, isn't getting along on
much less than $c.bO a day for tips.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
A MODERN SOLOMON.

n NiOi'EitN oOIOHON
All the solomons are not dead.
He was magistrate who was used
to dealing with negro boys.
Two boys were brought up for steal
ing
Evidently one was guilty, but 1t was
hard to tell which one
The magistrate placed them in sepa-
rate cells, gave each one a leather
string of equal length.
Now, boys. the string in the hands
of the thief will grow" he said.
In two hours the boys We're brought
out.
One showed is string; it had not
been touched.
The other had cut two inches off OF
his string.
The judge said: II got you"
And he had.
Baltimore News
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Canyicts for Roads

From the Oneonta Southern Democrat
The convict question is going to be a
live issue in the campaign next year
There is strong sentiment In favor of
taking the convicts out of the mines and
putting them ON the public roads
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
sKEPTICAL NOW

SKEPTICAL NOW.
Before they wed.
Whateer he said,
The idol of his heart would never
doubt it;
But lately we
Are told that she
Is more inclined to think bit
about it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Sad Blow 10 Golfers

From the Montgomery Advertiser
Now that Senator Warren of Wyoming
has been reelected, we are forced to the
unhappy conclusion that Golfers Week
ly has a limited circulation in Wyoming
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The people of Adrianople have not ever
been asked about the disposition of thei
ancient town.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

The west and the south were ignored
when Boston made up that list of 50 Amer
lean immortals.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
TIME TO MOURN.

Excuse us while we utter quick
Some cries of pain;
We hear our old friend Menelik
Is dead again.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

Germany is quiet. she has a whole
some fear of The English suffragettes.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Not Knocking the Service

From the Prattville Progress.
Blind telephone girls are employed by
tho Baltimore Y. NJ c. A. In some other
cities it seems that deaf girls are en-
ployed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
QUITE OTHERWISE.


Goblet tells me he likes to dip into
books. He doesn't look like reader
of books
And he isn't reader of books.
What Joblet meant was that he likes
to dip into other peoples pocket
books"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

THE VICTOR.
A little mouse
Got on a souse--
We tell you this with much re-
greet
Then ambled out
And put to rout
A wild and woolly suffragette.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
DOES ANyRoDy KNOW ?

o listen to this glad refrain,
Sweet FRITZ Scheff is free again'
We're not at all with FRITZ vext--
We simply wonder who'll be next.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
SAFE AT LAST

An elderly woman in the West Bot.
toms, whose home was only few feet
on the Missouri side of the state line
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
"The Drowsy Ear of Nisht,

From the Guntersville Democrat
The roller skating fever has struck the
town and from kind of reckless sidewalks
stage it is about to develop into regula,
rink. We may expect the drowsy ear OF
night to be somewhat vexed when the
rink gets into full swing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

All cities are ambitious to stand high N
the parcel post list.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Editor Hns Doubts

From the Conecuh Record.
A New York woman is said to have
worked her way to the top of the tele-
phone business, but we can't say that we
can approve Of members of her sex climb
ing those tall poles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
False Alarm

From the Huntsville Mercury Banner.
The way some OF the Senate inyest:
eating committees hold on to the Job
makes one suspicion they are afraid to
turn loose for fear they may be investi-
gated In turn.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
A Nature Fake

From the Union Springs Herald.
Many think the cold weather of yes-
tcrday arrived just in time to save the
neck of the peach crop.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05

LIABLE TO GET PUNCTURED.
Here comes Twombler. who seems
to consider himself a lion in society,""
quite true, but he had better avoid
that fierce old dame over there in the
corner. She's one OF society's porcu-
pines."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
Could stand Anything

from the Colbert County Reporter.
A woman in Ohio is advertised as tho
first women in the world that baked or
roasted in a fireless cook stove" Some
salamander.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
AN INTERLUDE.

AN INTERLUDE.
How sweet the songs that lovers sing
When sound the first soft notes of
spring
And Ger the swiftly greening sod
The violets born CT April nodl
All life is conscious of a thrill
And Nature doth her vows fulfill,
While leaving tree and vernal bud,
The silver spray that decks the flood
The suns bright rays that daily WOO
Earth's tender plants-the skies of
blue,
Unite their charms to prophecy
Midsummer glories, by and byl
The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-02-05
More smoke wanted


More Smoke Wanted
From the Cordova Herald.
Cordova invites the manufactures that
is driving out with its
Smoke ordinance to come here and mix
their smokestacks with our church
steeple. We don't object to smoke as
long as 1t means industrial prosperity.
Proud of Birmingham
From the Lneville Headlight.
Birmingham is the pride of all Alabama
In the Magic City giant strides are be-
ing made along all lines of human en-
Geavor.
Sad Blow 10 Golfers
From the Montgomery Advertiser.
Now that Senator Warren of wyoming
has been reelected, we are forced to the
conclusion that Golfers Week
ly has limited circulation in Wyoming.
Convicts for Roads
From the Oneonta Southern Democrat.
The convict question is going to be a
live issue in the campaign next year.
There is a strong sentiment In favor of
taking the convicts out of the mines and
putting them ON the public roads
Editor Has Doubts
From the Conecuh Record.
A New York woman is said to have
phone business, but we can't say that we
can approve of members of her sex CLIMB
ing those tall poles.
Could stand Anything
from the Colbert County Reporter.
A woman in Ohio is advertised as .thc
first women in the world that baked or
roasted in fireless cook stove" Some
salamander.
"The Drowsy Ear of Night.
From the Guntersville Democrat
The roller skating fever has struck the
town and from kind of reckless sidewalks
Stage 1t is about to develop into a reguIa,
rink We may expect the drowsy ear OF
night to be somewhat vexed when ,he
rink gets into full swing.
NATURE rake
1 rom the Union Springs Herald
Many think the cold weather of ves-
tcrday arrived just in time to save the
neck of the peach crop.
False Alarm
From the Huntsville Mercury Banner
The way some of the Senate invest;
eating committees hold on to the lob
makes one suspicion they are afraid tc
turn loose for fear they may be investl.
gated In turn.
Not Knocking the Service
+ rom the Prattville Progress.
Blind telephone girls are employed b,
tho Baltimore Y. NJ. c. A. In some othe,
cities it seems that deaf girls are EN-.
p,oyed.
TO BE LATE THE FASHION
From the Philadelphia Ledger
''Punctuality is the courtesy of kings.
said Louis XVIII. Samuel Smies, quot
ing the saying. makes the comment: .I
is also the duty of gentlemen, and the ne
cessity of men of business Why, then
in polite" society should 1t be permiss
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
PICKERING TACKLED HARD.

Earl Pickering. one Of the greatest
football and baseball players I'VE de-
veloped at the University of Mime
sofa, has been practicing law at Ba-
ker, Mont, and has gone to Mime
apolis to take unto himself a wife.
On Sept. 10 he will be married to
Miss Bessie Yale, and that night the
couple will leave for their honeymoon
In the south. This fall Mr.. Pickering
Is to coach football at Arkansas uni
versity at Lafayetteville. Ark. and at
the end Of the football season Mr..
and Mrs. Pickering will go to Baker
to make their home in that little city.
Last year "Pick" coached at YER
mont university with great success.
and on his return from the east start
ed the practice Of law in Minneapo-
lis. Not satisfied with the field in
which he found himself. the former
Gopher football star decided to ac-
cept Greeley's "go west" dictum and
established his law Office in Baker. in
the eastern part Of Montana. Just to
prove that he raj not particularly
crazy Pickering Immediately took a
homestead near Baker and at the
present moment he is not only the
boss, with a partner. Of a fine law
business. but Is also king of 100 acres
of some Of the finest country that
ever belonged to Uncle Sam. On top
Of this Mr.. Pickering is the leading
candidate for county attorney in Ba-
ker and will be elected without the
question of a doubt this fall. All OF
which shows that "Pick" learned
something besides football while al
the state university.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
At the Hotels

DACOTAH-K. Kelly, Fargo: w. J.
Grady, Lankin; r. ]. Willis, Mayville;
F. A. Braathen. Mayville: Ben Vim.
ner. Fargo; L. d. Best, Fargo: E. ].
Peterson, Lakota: ]. B. Mooney, Saw
yer: S. B. HOFFMAN,. Fargo: c. ],
Lord. Cando: Henry Lord. Cando; G.
c. Lord. Cando; j. L. Duman, Lakota;
A. Christianson. Fargo; E. ". Upham
Cummings.
FREDERICK-R. ]. Coots. Grafton;
]. H. Baxendale. ]. Rasmussen, Devils
Lake; +. w. Dornig. Lakota; j. Kel.
lund, Langdon: j. H. Hamilton, Lang.
don; c. H. Amhier. Fargo; Frank
Hayes. Grafton: Helmer Walstad,
Kenmare; r. ]. Dickie, Hamilton; G.
A. Pfaffman, Fargo; D. D.. Doping,
Bismarck.
NORTHERN-J. r. Gates. For,
Ransom: w. NJ. Hendricks, Mott: H
H. Wallace. McCanna.
IMPERIAL-Herman Riddle. Hills.
boro; Fred Clement. Fargo; w. p
Stevenson, Minot; Charles Hughes
Emerado: J: Rasmussen, Devils. Lake;
Carl Langeland, Berg; Mabel Jack.
son, Cavalier.
COLUMBIA-Mrs. c. H. Fedse
Berwick: H. Hanson. Cakes: g.. "
Smiley. Cakes; J. N. Ottum, Grafton;
p. Murphy. McCanna; Hannah Nc.
Shany, Arvilla.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
new YORK CLUB
Makes APPEAL
Ask Directors Of National
League to Override Pres.
Lynch's Decision.

New York. Sept. s.-The New York
National league club has appealed to
the board Of directors Of the league
from the decision Of President Lynch.
awarding the Philadelphia-New York
game of August 80 to Philadelphia.
This announcement was made by Sec
rotary Heydler Of the National league.
The game, which was being played
at Philadelphia was declared forfeited
to New York by Umpire Brennan in
the ninth inning, because Of the ac-
tons Of the crowd in the centerdield
bleachers.
President Lynch decided that the
umpire hal exceeded his rights, re-
versed Brennan's finding and awarded
the game to Philadelphia.
The dispute has aroused. wide inter-
est owing to the drawing closer Of the
pennant race and the possibility, even
though remote, that the game might
figure decisively in the ultimate out
come Of the 'pennant contest.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
MICHIGAN YET NAY
return TO FOLD Of
WESTERN CONFERENCE

Minneapolis. Sept. s.-Football
games between the University of Min
nesota Inc University Of Michigan
may be resumed as a result of a reso-
luton received by the Minnesota
board Of regents from the governing
board Of the Michigan university.
THE resolution says it is UNDER
stood that universities in the western
conference have reached a new agree
ment on the rules governing the con-
ference and that under the agreement
all these rules and subsequent rules
before enforcement and adoption
should be approved unanimously by
members Of the conference"
Under these conditions" says the
statement, this board would welcome
a resumption by the. University OF
Michigan Of membership in the con-
ference"
The Minnesota regents referred the
Michigan communication to the Uni
versity faculty senate for considera-
ton. "
The latest problem: Who is going
to ear the tons of valuable jewelry
reported as stolen this summer?
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
SP0RTShEN FIND
GAME Plentiful
Local Nimrods Swarm to the
Fields in Search of Prai-.
RE Chicken.

There was a general exodus of hunt
ers from Grand Forks early Sunday
morning and most Of them returned
to the city late Sunday or early today
with good sized bags of prairie chick
ems as proof of their ability as marks
men.
Most Of the reports that the birds
are to be found in large numbers and
that they are in good condition for
eating.
The heavy rain which fell early
Sunday morning had washed out the
old scents. and made the work of The
dogs much easier than would have
otherwise been the case.
There was a strong wind blowing
Sunday morning. which carried the
birds along at high speed as soon as
they mounted into the air. and made
the shooting more difficult than 1t
would otherwise have been.
Hunting is reported as being es-
pecially good in the districts north and
west Of the city. which were the di-
rections taken by most Of the sports
men.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
East Grand Fork.
JAIL DELIVERY
NEARLY SUCCEEDS
Pioneer in Local Pen Tears
Bricks From Walls-He
Quit Too Soon.

Pat Burke. q vag with an inventive
in his efforts to free himself and
some forty prisoners from the East
Grand Forks Jail last night.
AS a result. Of his failure to go
through with the scheme. he will
spend the next thirty days in the
county Jail at Crookston. +,
When one Of the city hall attend
ants went into the Jail this morning,
he discovered a large number Of bricks
ing. he found that the prisoner had
reached the last layer Of bricks.
A few more minutes work. and
Burke would have completed his Jail
delivery job. andSsJudge Rasmussen
would have BEEN cheated Of two
hours pastiming this morning.
One Prisoner Peaches"
The police had some little difficulty
in ascertaining who. did the job. After
much questioning. they found one in
mate Of he hog pen" who "squealed."
He declared Burke was the near Mon
te Cristo.
Burke had no, tools to work with.
but. being mechanically inclined. he
lost no time in getting them. He
went into the toilet room and wrecked
part Of the fixutres with his boot. TAX
ing a small piece Of iron. he pried
one brick loose and used this Is a
hammer.
The frequency with which prison.
ers were brought to the Jail yesterday
afternoon and last night made 1t hard
for him to keep at his Job steadily.
Finally. when within a few inches Of
the outside he stopped. preferring to
wait until earer morning. -
Dirty Towel Over Hole.
While not working at the wall,
Burke hung a dirty towel W. the
hole.
This morning. before his job was
complete. he, with about forty others.
were herded upstairs to the municipal
court room. where they were quickly
dealt with. It was after the prisoners
had been removed that the attempt
al jail delivery was discovered.
Not q Stone Mason.
What are you? A stone mason?"
mo. SIR"
Just a vag. Ell? Well, .25 and
costs or sixty dayA. When you go to
Crookston. you better take a crowbar
with you. The cells there have nice,
iron plating over the bricks. and it's
a little more work." "
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
SCHOOL
ADOPTS SCHEME
Another District Votes to
Affiliate with Local
Institution.

At a special election held Saturday
night. school district No. q. located
north Of the city. unanimously voted
to affiliate with the East Grand Forks
institution for Industrial education.
This makes the fourth district to af1il-
late, and the third one to adopt the
proposition unanimously. In the other
district there were only two votes
against afiliation.
No. 2, north of the city: No. IS, two
and one-half miles east Of the city;
No. "a, four miles east, and No. IL,
the Mallory school.
Superintendent Wolfe and the in
dustrial' teachers are now busy on
plans for the extension work, and ex-
pect to have them completed so work
can be begun this week.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
.HETTNCER fire Loss IS
$4,000; FLOUR MILL Burns
Total Insurance on Property But $40,
O00-Cause of Blaze Not
Asceftained.

Hettinger. n. D., Sept. "a loss of
about $4,000 resulted from the de.
dock & Kahn elevator.
The fire started in the engine room
of the mill from some aus not de-
finitely ascertained. and had such a
big start when discovered that there
was no chance to stop it.
On both buildings the insurance 10
only $4,000.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1913-09-08
At the Met.

tBanzai,' which will be seen at the
Met Monday and Tuesday, is a two
part offering with the first Genes laid
in Toxic, Japan. while the latter part
Of the story takes place in America.
The japanese settings r very at
tractive and the japanese characters
appear all through. The American
officer lives with a Japanese girl,
Mirami, but leaves her to return to
America. She follows him dressed as
a boy. and with an accomplice steals
valuable papers from him. He shoots
her by mistake. but the papers are
burned by her companion. The story
is by w. H. Clifford and is a most sue
cessful offering.