The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1913-10-31
lie FOHOlWedHiS
Natural q |! Bent & i.

tonight. I9H seq " uSAN " iSS 80
servant 90 on a holiday for day or
two and they want me desperately at
the Women's Aid and Relief Bazaar
this evening. 1t is the last day. II
yon thought you could manage by
Yourself
IN try to survive it," observed
MIR. Meek, good.uaturedly. 81 don't
fancy Il will proTe fatal"
iii get a point and cook it thiG
morning. then" went on Mrs. Meek.
cheefully, land you can have it cold
for dinner"
Thank you" replied Mr.. Meek.
you'll do nothing Of the kind. !
fancy haven't gone camping out with
the Volunteers every year for nothing.
suspect can prepare a hot dinner
as we'll as most women"
Thus it came about that Mrs.
Meek abandoned all ideas OF preparing
Mr.. Neeks dinner for him and betook
herscA II to the bazaar. So 1t resulted,
furthermore. that Mr.. Meek left his
Office about 1 o'clock that afternoon,
and proceeded to collect on his way
home the necessary supplies for
dainty little dinner.
An alluring display, OF geese was
the first thing to catch his eye. and
he was just on the point Of securing
one Of them, when by good luck, or
more probably through the natural
sagacity Of the man, he recollected
that as rule you don't cook geese
lust as they are. In the momentary
reaction that followed this feat OF
memory he bought couple OF mutton
chops and three tomatoes.
"rll have good, old-faShioncd'
English dinner" he thought. by
love-" he exclaimed moment later,
I'm have some oyster soup TO begin
with, and apple pudding 10 finish.
lie was so tickled with this idea
that he promptly rushed into a green
grocer's and purchased half a peck OF
their best eating apples, and then
hurried home, pauSing to order some
oysters on the way.
BY > o'clock he had the fire going
beautifully. BY o'clock he was just
beginning to enjoy the thing. The
tomatoes were stewing divinely: the
potatoes were boiling to their hearts
content, and the milk for the oyster
soup was simmerng contentedly on
the back Of the stove. The oysters
had not yet arrived.
Dear met" thought the ambitious
gentleman. 81 wish had thought OF
il in time and I'd have some oyster
patttes for sort of grand finale.
Hello, that's this? BY thunder. il
that woman hasn't left me some cold
ham and a custard pie! BY JoveAior
twopence I'd throw the whole lot ont
into the back yard"
At half-pRSt six he puts the chops
on to brOil, "as in the good old days
Of yore"--this poetic allusiOn to the
style of cooking being OccaSioneG into
the fire. whence he rescued It with
great presence of mind by the joint
assistance of the poker and one of
the hest table napkins.
At the time the chop was thus res
cued both it and the table napkin
were fairly well done~-tO put 1t mild.
~. This difficulty he got over by put
ting the crring chop on the window
sill 10 cool, and the napkin into the
fre-tO do the other thing.
This accomplished. and with one
chop gently cooking on the Sridiron
ami the other. one cooling on the win
dow sill. he started to construct the
paste for his apple pudding, This
proved most fascinating.
lie placed large quantity Of flour
In small bowl. cmpttcd a jug OF
water on top of It. and proceeded to
mold it deity into shape. as he had
often seen his wife do The ilUur and
water promptly fOrsoOk tho bowl and
bctook themselves to his hands.
Then the milk for the soup began
TO burn Just as tho potatoes boiled
dry. lie rushed to tho rescue and left
the greater portion Of paste evenly
divided between the handles Of the
two sauCcpans aud the poker,
At this juncture the tomatoes
started TO see If they couldn't SnrpaSS
the milk in burning. They succeeded.
The cat which was accustomed To
6.3O dinner, walked off with the chop
on the window sill. while the chop
on the fire grew beautifully black on
The down side" So many things were
burning at the same time that Mr..
Meek gave up hope OF trying t" dis
cover just which one was burning
mess.
Let the blessed things burn till
thev re sick OF IT," was the extremely
broAd.mirded way in which he sum
med up the situation. With the
astu'eneSs that characterized him as
distinguished from his felQw.mrn.
he gave up all effort to track the
truant paste, and simply popped his
apples into the oven to bake
It was now about 100. and the fire
was getting h0Ncr than anything else
on earth. cxccpt. PERHAPS. Mr. Mock.