New-York tribune., 1913-05-18


voice was "a piping imitation Of a spinster
friend. Il DO believe hear the doorbcll,'
The bell undoubtedly had rung. The
Kitchen hcll II was. and with a cry Of JOY
Tom seized the can of oysters from the boy
hand and. reaching for fork, began 20 cat
ravcn0u,lv. "Fo,i to a labOrng man Is
sweet. hc said. and nodded o. the grinning
boy: then sat down and at leisure ate ot
bread and butter and oysters until he could
ci' no more Pushing the things aside he
got 40 and stretched his arms at full length
sleepy, 80 cat was ever more 50.
haven't stopped "a minute. but nothing
done. The house looks like its had an acci-
dent II may be a good thing for man 10
know how big a fool he Is, but this man VIII
never De the same kind Of fool again. The
next time | STAY home all day It will be be-
cause I'm dead. OF likely 10 be in day OF so.
I'm going to sleep for fifteen minutes. My
head feel Ike buzzsaw. Just fifteen min
utcs.
TWO hours later he opened his eyes, and
with "a confused sense Of something
wrong Jumped up gutily and hurried into
the dining room. set the table, Thomas,
De- said aloud and as II 10 someone at his
side. set the table and demonstrate your
thcoric5 Where the water coolcrt'
Going into the pantry. he picked up the
water cooler and placed II IN the center 81
thc dining table when there's no maid
one must DO his own waiting hc COM
mcn'cd under his breath and around the
Iunsainly object hc placed SIX glasses. Sev-
cral loayc, of bread were next cut and placed
on the table, butter was brought from the
refrigerator. and plates, knives. forks, cups,
and sauccrs arranged in awkward fashion,
after which he stood of and looked admir-
nglv at the work Of his hands
! "Not IN unnecessary thing on II! His
voice was triumphant. "Womcn are nat
Iurallv weak when It comes 10 change ol
customs They like pretty things too well.
! In the kitchen he put celery and lettuce IN
q pan Of water. investigated the shelves and
made effort to decide which was the tea
! kettle and which the Cotccpot knocked over
ID couple Of sauccpans, and finally lald on a
| huge platter three large steaks and looked
at them lovingly.
In the hall the clock was striking, and IN
| Iamazcmcnt he took out hi, watch and looked
at it, Four o'clock Where had the day
gone, \ grasshoppcr couldn't have been
more active; but what had he done; a
noise behind him made him turn. Marie
was coming in the door.
LOW DO YOU do, Mrs. Markham?' Val
IL ianty her husband nodded toward her.
"Comc over and tell me how YOU do;"
Marie at arms length held up her lips to
be kissed. What in the world have YOU
| been
Having? \ beautiful time, Of course.
I'm thinking Of joining a New Thought So
cictv. I've been thinking New Thought all
day. One more day like this, and Id take
my X y. degree. That means Know
Nothing Marie. X. n. means Know
| Nothing
But what have you been doing all dayF
Maric's voice was only less dismaycd than
her face "Thc house is as cold rs an ice
pond, and the street hasn't been swept, and
nothing has been cleaned up. Our room is
sight The things have been just thrown on
the bed, and the bathroom not touched. |
bet you've been rcadngl'
Reading | haven't sat down since YOU
left, and had nothing for my lunch but some
oysters and bread | did take little nap
But I'm always through with everything
| by eleven when have no maid, and | sew
and have company and 90 out and
81 don't doubt it, but you don't have the
doorbells and telephone to ring ten thousand
times as they have done today. There S the
phone again The miserable thing ought
to be taken out It's a blamed nuisance