Arizona republican., 1913-09-14
The Wingless Hen

Tn the beginning God made all | things for some good purpose. The ! fly and buzzard act as scaVengers,
 the faithful dog to guard. the birds | to cheer with their sweet melody. ! the peafOWl for beauty. two kinds of 1 hens-One kind have wings and are Appreciated by all mankind. the other are Wingless. Apologies to the fea- thered ones) and their good purpose l is unknown. also their origin. and 1t don't seem fair to lay the blame on Almighty for the existence of these creatures. She seems to be cross between q parrot and a pet pig. The first her presence is known is by her cackle in other words her gossip. She has no wings for she will never
 have any use for them here or here after. She has a well developed bill as practice makes perfect she finds this very useful to pick into her neighbors business. She is q stran-
 ger to common sense, as that is out of
 her reach and then it is very dis tasteful to her. She prefers some thing like scandal as that is meat and drink to her. We never find
 her among broad minded people. for
 birds of a feather flock together. She hasn't time to read and keep up with
 the times, and then her digestive ap-
 paratus seems to be too weak for
 any substantial matter. therefore
 something light and weak must be
 her brain food.
 The human race all seem to have
 ordinary hearts. but her creator must
 have been selfish for instead of a
 heart he supplied her liberally with
 a tough gizzard, and gave her or
 him the case may be, five toes
 instead of four, this enables her to run a little faster to present to her l beloved sister or brother a delicious 1 morsel of scandal.
 She usually depends upon one or | more of her sisters of her race to help distribute their worded imagina tions about some neighbor that as a rule have higher ideals and is very busy attending to her own business A few wingless old hens will putting their imaginations into words across the back fence, forgetting they have not cOmbed their hair that day, or the meal is late, and jumping at con- clusions about some innocent person, whose heart is probably almost eaten iway with trouble and who is strug gIing braveIy with sorrows buried
 rom the public eye. No one knows mothers real circumstances in life. f they hear a mortgage was closed )n some one they gleefully say "I old you so,'' they don't deserve lnything anyway" Or if some poor girl is lost they almost go into hys- cries about it, when the chances ire their own skirts have more mud ,n them than the girls and probably heir own son or daughter is just as guilty or worse. Some time this hen 5 found among the male sex, if leighbor is progressive they whisper lround they had better pay their lebts.
 Her presence is dreaded worse in neighborhood than an epidemic of mall pox or cholera. She has caus- d more suffering than all the wars, nore doWnfalls than all the panics n history, is nuisance to the com nunity, a detriment to society and a O. worker with the devil. Uncle sam can build fleets, keep a stand k ng army prepared for war, but to ope with a busy body hens tongue eems to be beyond his comprehen- ion. She has sent more people to rink and ruin than all the other gents of Satan combined. Some ines this wingless hen marries into he human race, of course she has one well, but heaven pity the unfor- mate member of the human race nat has married her. Sometimes 1ey think, Well I've got John so hats the use," then they quit us- 2 their mental faculties not luch in the first place to use-and apend upon John to do their think
 g, then soon all the mind they ever
 d have comes to a stand still they et to thinking it is too much trouble
 be so particular about looks any ay, and gradually their hair is put Fl
 the style worn 200O years B. c. hey probably do this for safety as me neighbor might rise up in ghteous indignation and get her lgers entangled in her downy locks.