davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
nDejlenxennnsa NfiNes. =

why ls 1t that d twelve dollar d
week clerk usually buys d thirty cent
luncheon?' asked prosperous man
who was regaiing himself at a down
town lunchroom on a glass OF milk and
q piece OF pie.
Because he has delicatessen wife.
was the reply OF his observant com
panion.
The men who were standing mp to
ten and fifteen cent luncheons in that
busy eating place were obviously more
prosperous than the men having thirty
and thirty-fve cent meals at the tables.
Those bookkeepers and clerks have
to get substantial meals at noon to keep
ct for their work." the man went on
to explain. Il employ six OF them
one at $14 and Ave at $12 week. I've
inquired about their home arrange
ments. They all live the same way
foffee and cereal for breakfast. delica-
lessen STUFF for what they call dinner,
seldom anything cooked in their homes
their wives don't know how. So
they have to eat substantial food at
noon. plague on these delicatessen
wivesF'-New York Mail.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

ippines and Hawaii Such things are
bad for international emily, but. Of
course. the Jsps win not 20 70 war with
the Uuite1 States
Statutes against alien owership Of land
are 10, unusual. The difficulty is TO
avoid violation Of treaties II appears
that the Japanese have been as much OPP
posed 10 the ownership Of land ID their
country by foreigners as the Csilfornians
are opposed TO japanese ownership Of
California real estate. But there must be
some adjustment Roosevelt when Presi-
dent called The Legislature of. Presi-
dent Wilson seems indisposed TO under
take such steps. but is keeping in very
close touch with people there whom he
can trust. Probably there will be an en-
tirely peaceful settlement. The danger
is that the matter will start again food
OF unfriendlv talk, just when the peace
makers nv much reiteration on important
occasions ha convinced the people of
the two Nations that il was better TO con-
verse pleasantly about one another.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Paving Bob Padgett. one Of the motor
;sns politicians and benifciaries of poll
s..ians in Baltimore city. has had his
aty paving contracts thrown out. because
~ investi CATION that reveals some Of the
srooked methods by which they were
o:,saiped. Commenting on Baltimore's
corrupt political machine. Of which Paw
i,g Bob is big spoke iu the wheel. the
Hartford Democrat says
1T is The. system, and il is hard TO de
Stroy, and can only be done hv the unit
Il effort Of the honest people Of the mu-
j, cipaliiy. WHO are more interested in
.ood government than in the success OF
sae gra ters of high or low degree, who
shrive because of the bourbonism and
Indifference Of so large part of the cleo
tarate. The machine. well oiled and
i ~enly alive to the favors 10 come, lay
their plans early TO capture the primary,
and rely on party loyalty 10 secure the
lection OF the nominees who have prom
,sed IN obey orders.
ssHow long this system will be allowed
10 rule the city and the counties similarly
A.llicsed where branches of the machine
.ssald sway, is for tire people themselves
s.s decide. There are many symptoms oi
rn awakening from the lethargy that
.0nq prevailed II has heen learned from
recent experience in many States. cities
a s..s.,sstiss that the honest and infatIi-
srnt ci.;zeus are in majority in nearly
Ill communities. aud in their hands ID
tnx power 10 dethFone the bosses and the
A,stem' IL there is concert of action
anoug law abiding voters who are patri-
.s,s enough TO give part Of theis time
sud effort 10 attend the primaries and
support as candidates for Office. only such
,srsons who are honest and capable and
.,lliug TO serve the public for the public
Aeod,
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Because OF factienai politics the non'-
;rstion Of labor leader John Mitchell for
!. .abor Commissioner, made by Govern or
!. nlzer. has been rejected by the New
crk State Senate. Mr. Mitchell came
.,to national prominence in 1902. during
me long anthracite strike. when he rep-
resented the miners with conspicuous
Utility. He then made q reputation for
at,solnte integrity which no subsequent
/. vents have in any degree diminished
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
siospltahle Crab.

Some species OF crabs enter into ..nri
GUS partnerships with other small ami
mails. The sponge crab lDrom1a vui
garis, Is SO named because of trick II
has Of attaching sponge to It's back
holding it there with its claws until 1t
is firmly fastened Since the sponge is
fllled with small needles aud gives of
a strong odor 1t protects the crab from
many enemies. In return It gets nour
ishment from the bits of food left over
from the crabs numerous repasts This
peculiar habit of the crab In shown b.
the behavior OF a young spider crab al
the New York aquarium When placed
in tank that contained many small
orange colored sea anemones the crab
Immediately discarded the scraps OF
seaweed with which 1t was covered and
adorned itself with the gayly coiored
aiiemoneS.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Eyes Of the Rarnaele.

In the barnacle we have a unique
and wonderful case of creature that
can afford as age comes on to dispense
with the eyesight that was so useful
In youth. for the young and old bar
nacle are as different. one from the
other. as fishes from seaweed. In the
heydey OF life the barnacle swims
about the sea. seeking its food with
the aid of its eyes and generally lead
ing roaming existence Later in
life, however. it grows tired OF this
aiInless wandering and settles down
to worry ship captains by attaching
itself to the keel Of their craft and de-
flying the much advertised powers OF
various preventive paints. Once there.
the barnacle has become fixture. and.
whether on ships or sharks its eye
sight ts OF no more use. 1t cannot
seek its food. and it cannot shun its
foes. for it never more will move.
Therefore its eyes become superfln-
ous and. according TO natures invaria-
BILE rule In such cases. disappear
Our Dumb Animals.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Il is neither fair nor in accordance with
.he facts 10 describe Secretary Bryan's
mission to California as failure. His
sactful presentation ssof the Administra-
:;,n's views Of the case has riveted the
sitention of the whole nation on the
same. and has compelled the respect
,:,en of hostile State Legislature. It
hes encouraged representative citizens of
california to appeal to the sober second
,ous ht Of the people through referen-
dnm, and has aroused public opinion
throughout the United States which can
.ct fail TO make an impression on the
s tiers of California when hey. come 10
s.ass Judgment on tie measure. Without
ustering word of reprnof. he has laid
hare the unspeakable folly of the legisla.
tors at Sacramento. and their insincerity
IA needlessly raising an international
::.sue to n-rease their prestige with un-
thinking partisan mobs. Ifthis be a fail
ar. itswonld he hard to define success. =
i'i,ila Record.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

While the little red schoolhouse"
may have been all righ: once upon a
.isne, the Baltimore News thinks it is
,nythipg but comforting 10 read in rec
mi bulletin of the United States Bureau
n, Education that il is far from keeping
.pwith the procession Of progress. It is.
"a fact, declared to be the center of con-
.;itions which are responsible for the
relatively high rate Of illiteracy in this
.,ountrysn AS investigation Of the prob
:.ms Of rural life proceeds, il becomes
creasingly clear that two of the chief
drawbacks are poor schools and poor
4 ads. County authorities, in their efforts
% keep. down the tax rates. neglect some
4 the best means 10 build up property
.aines, to keep the ambitious at home
nd TO develop the waste places.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Best Medicine for Colds.

When a druggist recommends a
remedy for colds, throat and lung
troubles, yon can feel sure that he
knows what he is talking abont.-
q. Lower, Druggist, of Marion,
Ohio, writes of DR.. Kings New
Discovery: 81 know DR.. Kings
New Discovery is the best throat
and lung medicine I sell. 1t cured
my wife of severe bronchial cold
after all other remedies failed. y
1t will do the same for you if you
are. suffering with a cold or any
bronchial, throat or lung cough.
Keepa bottle on hand all the time
for everyone in the family to use.
1t ia a home doctor. Price 50c and
81. 90. Guaranteed by Eli T. Rey.
nolds.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Health a Factor in Success

The. largest factor CO itributing To- a
mans success is undoubtedly health. 1t
has been observed that man is seldom
sick when his bowels are reeular-he is
never well when they are constipate!.
For consiipation yau viii find nothing
quite SO good as Chamberlain's Stomach
and Liver Tablets. They not only move
the no sels-bu, improve the appetite and
strengthen the digestion. They are for
sale by Eli T. Reynolds.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Most Prompt and Effectual Cure for
Bad Colds.

When you have bad cold syon want q
remedy that will mol only give relie'. bat
effec, prompt and permanent cure. a
remedy that is pleasant TO take, remedy
that contains nothing injurious. Cham
beriain's Cough Remedy meets all these
requirements. It actsson natures plan,
relieves the lungs, aids expectoration
opens the. secretions AMI restores the
system 10 healthy condition. This REM
edy has world wide sale and Us !, and
can always he depended upon. Sold hv
Eli T. Reynolds
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

The calamity howlers who predicted
sisaster to the country on the change OF
administration are becoming sadly dis
appointed because their partisan talk Of
.ireadful things to come has not b en-
scrne ont. No sensible man looks for
any change that will effect the country,
.,.d indications are that things will conf
taues in honrishing condition. knock !
= 10. the contrary Notwithstanding
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
vanishina .Merrie Ensland."

There are still. | believl, people who
talk Of ''Merrie England" and vaguely
associate it with morris dances. may
poles and Shakespeare's plays. They
are generally sentimentalists OF the
kind who prate of the good old times.
which never existed. and 'tsood Queen
Bess." who possessed ever. quality
you like but goodness They idealize
beer In the past and practice vegetnri.
anism in the present = London By
stander
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

rhe Saturday half-holiday is gradually
incoming to be generally observed, and
u: i short time all industries and factories
h u, close at noon on Saturday. Il will
-<,sn become an established fact that
~arking hours will consist of 6ve and q
naif days for the week.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
An Excuse.

Bessie Did you scream when ne
tried TO kiss you2 .Iessie-No There
10 poor man across the street who Is
areadfully sick Philadelphia reie-
graph
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Wife-What do you mean by telling
Mrs. Crewso's husband you never ash
my advice about anything? Husband
Well. my dear. don't. You don't wait
to be asked.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Exact Justice In commonly more mer.
cifui To the mng run than pity, for II
tends to foster In men those stronger
qualities whirn make them good CHI
zens.-- Lowell
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Plenty Of Slate.

'.Put that ton OF coal on the slate.
directed the customer.
I'VE have no slate" said the deaie,
frigidly
"Oh. yes. you have. got 300 pounds
Of it with the coal" Washington Her
aid.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Cruel.

Miss Oldgiri-Oh. Mr.. iighthead. I've
just seen eighteen happy summers.
Mr., Lighthead- Only eighteen napp,
ones. What an unhappy life yon must
have hadl- Exchange.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
HAINES s KIRK.
STORE OPEN THREE MfGHZS.A WEEK.

'Let US so into this department store
until the shower is over"
II prefer this harness shop" said her
husband. ''You won't see sov uiany
things you want"-P Pittsburgh Post
The midland journal., 1913-05-09

Grief hallows hearts even whils Il
ages heads. Bailey
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Hard FOR Him.

'sWombat says 1t Is hard to find a
Woman's pocket"
HE ought 10 know. He married foi
money - Washington Herald.
The midland journal., 1913-05-09
Works Both Ways.

One reason why girl laughs often
Is because she IL pretty. and one rea
son why she Is pretty h neeause she
laughs often Dallas News.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10
Goods Roads.

A great deal has been said by |
many of the papers of the state con- /
corning good roads and good streets
In the last year. 10 fact the whole |
country seems to be waking up TO
the great benefits of good, substan.
tial roads. We are glad TO see
this awakening AMI shall do every
thing III our power to assist in any
way we can in this good work.
In towns and cities we believe i'm
the properly owners paying one
third the cost Of raving and bond
ing TO pay the rest We will never
have any paved streets In Ceredo
unless this is done, for property
owners viii not vote to pay the en-
tire amount for paving any particu-
lar street thereby enhancing the val
ne OF all real estate on said street.
AS Wayne county has no debt of
any kind we believe it would be an
excellent idea To issue bonds and
build hard roads-roads that will
last. We can do this we verify be-
lleve without increasing the taxes a
penny. A great deal of money is
spent every year on the roads of
this county that amount to practi-
cally nothing We feel confident
that enough money is spent, almost
wasted, IN thls manner to create a
shaking fund and pay the interest
on enough bonds TO build good,
hard roads, all over this county
Citizens of Wayne county, build
good Toads now and get the benefits
of them while you live, for in a few
years Of you work for good roads
and the betterment of mankind
here) you may 90 to a place that is
paved with gold. Throw old moss
backism aside and get on the good
road of do-something. 1t will paw
you well. Your farms will be
doubled in value in six months after
a substantial hard road is built to
tn IN.
Reader, think about this and write
your views to this paper for publ
cation.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10
Notice of Dissolution.
To Whom It Nav Concern

To Whom 1t Nav Concern
Notice Is hereby given that at a gener.
al meeting of the stockholders of the
Tri-State Enterprise Co., held at Keno
va, Wayne county, West Virginia, on
the first day of November, 1913, reso-
luton was adopted by majority in in
terests Of the entire stock of said com
pany as follows
Resolved: That the Tri State Enter
prise Co. corporation, heretofore
formed and existing under the laws
OF the State Of West Virginia be and
the same is hereby discontinued and its
charter be surrendered 70 the State of
Vest Virginia; that said company dis
continue Us business, and all of it's as
sets, If any there be- be converted into
money aud applied TO its indebtedness
and the balance if there be any, be di-
vided among the stockholders as their
interests may appear.
And the president Of this company is
hereby authorized and directed 20 GER
tify this resolution 90 the Secretary OF
State, and 70 publish same in the Ceredu
Advance, newspaper Of general circu-
lation in Wayne county and near the
printing Office of this company
Given under my hand this sd day of
NOV ember, 1913
IRIS STAFF ENTERPRISE Co.
Sec4w. ID. BLA1N SHAW, President.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10
Our Clubbing Offer.

We are enabled for short time
to present the most advantageous
clubbing offer that was ever arranp-
ed for weekly paper. All of the
following for one year for only
$l.75:
The Ceredo Advance,
The Weekly Cincinnati Euqulrer.
The Farm News, Monthly,
Poultry Success, Monthly,
Woman's World Monthly,
Farm and Flreside, Monthly,
The publications are all standard
and high class, and the total sub.
scription price would he three dol
lars and sixty cents. BY the club
bling arrangement you will he able
TO secure your home paper and these
interesting publications for less
than half the regular price
The above offer will be withdrawn
few days. 1t applies to new
RscTibers or old ones paying up
Iesrages and for one year in
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10
California Woman Seriously Alarm
&c,

ga short time ago I contracted a
severe cold which settled on my lungs
and caused me great deal of annoy-
ance. l would have bad coughing spells
and my lungs were so sore and infiamed
l began TO be seriously alarmed. A
friend recommended Chamberlain g
Cough Remedy, saying she had used it
for years. bought a bottle and it re
lieved my cough the first night, and in a
week L was rid of the cold and soreness
of my lungs" writes Miss Marie Ger
Der, Sawtelle, Cal. For sale by all
dealers. adv.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

MLITANTs in London threw
hammers at the Judge and smashed
the furniture, but perhaps he had
provoked them in some say.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

CINE members Of the banking
and currency committee ought to
give and take" says an exchange.
The trouble is that they are all try
ing to take.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

ABOUT this time of the year the
small boy il torn between the desire
10 have the regular fun and the neN
cessity of assuming pre-Chri4tmas
virtue.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

EMPEROR WILLIAM shot only
l,leO pheasants while in Austria.
All the others may have come in and
surrendered.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

Miss WILsoN's husband says that
"getting married is serious" He
Is finding II out much sooner than
the most of 'em.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

GENERAL HUERTA has had trouble
with his Secretary of the Interior.
IN fact, all Of his interior arrarg e-
ments seem to have been giving him
trouble.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

LET US hope that the man who
rocked the boat last summer and
got away with it will skate into
thick ice this winter.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

SOME men regard themselves as
philanthropIsts, while the rest of
the world looks upon them as easy
marks.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

The silkworm is caterpiller that
has broken into business.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

THERE cannot help being a break
in eggs when they fa'l.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

How the world does move. The
colored people are using salty razors.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

RECIPE for Mexican stew, Mix
Juarez, Chihuahua, Popocatapeti,
STIR in Huerta, Carranza and Pancho
Villa; serve hot.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

MONEY may talk. but it never
tells you To be careful with it.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

PRESIDENT WILSON is gong to
have a hard month, with the cur
rency bill and the dressmaker's bill
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

CONTEST TOR the armor l.late
plant begins to sound like an anvil
chorus.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

and Office Managers in remembering
their employees; to Partners in Med
icine, Law, ETC., in remembering
each other; to any man remember
ing his friends.
Ladies will find them extremely satisfac-
tory in remembering Husband; Fathers
Brother; Son.
To our charge customers, we will gladly
furnish as many Bonds as they request
Chargeable to their account only in case
they are presented any time and are good for
Merchandise in any department up to the
amount specified.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

OwING to the proclIvities of the
cold storage places, the eggnog be-
comes more hilarious than 1t use to
lie.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

a HE man Who fired the first shot
the civil war has just died again
this time at Dallas, Texas.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

Gift Bonds are the most
convenient form Of giving.
They relieve one Of worry;
Of time wasted i'm shopping;
of the fear that what they
have selected will not be
just the thing that will
please. They allow the re-
Cipient to choose his own
gift.
We especially recommend them to
Bankers, Wholesalers Merchants
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10

WK are still fixing to get ready
to begin to do something about
Huerta
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1913-12-10
GIFT BONDS

Can Be Had in One, Two, Three.
Five and Ten Dollar Amounts
The Bridgeport evening farmer. [volume] (Bridgeport, Conn.) 1866-1917, 1913-01-10
rennyson and Tobacco.

Tennyson's devotion to his pipe is
well known, but the following story
of it will probably be fresh to most
readers A friend had driven him
from Plymouth to visit an old lady
who stood in no awe of the poet. The
visitors were invited to remain for the
night, but on Mr. Tennyson's stipulat-
ing that if he did he should be allowed
to smoke in his bedroom the old lady
bridIed up. That she could not allow.
Bedroom smoking was not only objec-
tionable, but dangerous, and for no
one would she relax her prohibition
rule. Mr.. Tennyson proving equally
obdurate the hostess own carriage was
ordered out, and he was sent In 1T
back to his hotel at Plymouth, whence,
however, he returned the next morn
Ing to breakfast.-From Mrs. Walford' IS
Recollections-
The Bridgeport evening farmer. [volume] (Bridgeport, Conn.) 1866-1917, 1913-01-10
MI of pbiIin of Maeedon.

PIutarch tells the following stories,
good in their way, Of Philip Of Mace
don:
In passing sentence on two rogues
he ordered one to leave Macedonia
with all possible speed, and the other
to try to catch him.
No less astute was his query as to
a strong position he wished to occupy,
which was reported by the scouts to
be almost 1mpregnable.
rs there not he asked, 'feven a
pathway to it wide enough for an ass
laden with &2ld? p
Philip, toos according to Plutarch, is
entitled to the fatherhood of an adage
which retains its ancient fame about
calling a spade a spade"
Another story tells how Philip re-
moved a judge, because he discovered
that the mans hair and beard were
dyed.
ST could not believe Plutarch re-
ports the king as saying, that one who
was false in his hair could be honest
n his judgments"
The Bridgeport evening farmer. [volume] (Bridgeport, Conn.) 1866-1917, 1913-01-10
Compliments.

Said certain eminent actor, who at
the age OF ffty-n1ne looks no more
than thirty fveN
'aI try to keep my hair on and my
stomach of-that is the true secret OF
perennial youth"
Then he told one Of his famous sto-
ries illustrative OF the horrors of corpu-
lence
"a fat man, he said, "couId not help
laughing one day at the ludicrous ap-
pearance OF a very bow legged chap,
one of thoA0 arch looking chaps, you
know.
Though total stranger to him, the
fat man slapped the bow legged chap
on the back and said:
BY lingo, brother, you look as if
you'd been riding a barrel
'@The bow legged man smiled and
poked his forefnger deep into the fat
man't soft, loose stomach.
And you look as if you'd been swal-
lowing one,' he Washington
Star. IS
The Bridgeport evening farmer. [volume] (Bridgeport, Conn.) 1866-1917, 1913-01-10

The increase of temperature observ-
ed is about / degree r. for every If
teen yards of descent in the earth.
Taking, then, as correct, the present
observed rate of increase, the tempera-
ture would be as follows: Water will
boil at the depth OF 2,4S0 yards;
lead melts at the depth OF $500 yards;
there Is red heat at the depth of seven
miles; gold meltS at twenty-One miles;
cast iron IneIts at seventy-fouE miles
and soft iron me1ts at ninety seven
miles At the depth of 100 miles there
is a temperature equal to the greatest
artificial heat yet observed, tempera-
ture capable of fusing platdna, porce-
lain and indeed every refractory sub
stance we are acquainted w1th.-Hum-
boldt's Cosmos.