davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
NEW IDEAS ABOUT INSOMNIA
Cure II by Not Caring Whether You
Sleep or Not, Is Latest
Advice Given.

People are very fussy about sleep
ing, and still more fussy about not
sleeping. A person who cannot sleep
thinks that he is the most suffering
piece of humanity in existence.
Shakespeare punished most of his
murderous characters and even his
ghosts with insomnia. Sleep was.
according to many of the poets and
sonnet makers, the only cure for the
rest of the world.
II seems a bit curious that 1t is
only people wanting to use sleep as a
method OF transportation from them
selves who cannot sleep. the Indian
apolis News observes. Children al
ways sleep except when they do not
want to, and animals are never trou-
bled when they haven't anything else
20 do They are not trying to forget
anything. Their conscieaces are clear.
They do not even know that they are
going to sleep-they just go.
The first best cure for insomnia
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Backs Mary's Little Lamb to Fight Bulldog

proudly led his newly acquired prize.
The bartender's eyes bulged and
loud guffaw went up from the Gus
toners.
What's tn NATTER" asked Mr..
Murphy. He's a thoroughbred bull
dog and his name is Timothy"
That amt bulldog; it's q lamb"
insisted the bartender.
Mr. Murphy's pride was wounded
so wounded that he left without buy
ing a drink. Meanwhile little Mary
Klina had missed her pet and had
started In pursuit. She followed the
trail for many blocks and past many
swinging doors. Finally she heard a
loud commotion in the rear yard Of q
saloon. and heard Mr Murphy saying:
sic I'm, Tim, sic In"
She ran into the yard and saw Mr..
Murphy attempting to push the timor-
Gus, awkward lamb toward a savage.
bowlegged English bull. which its
hilarious owner was holding in leash.
Bet you SO Tim can lick m. "
Murphy was saying. He's a young
one, but he's fighter when he gets
started. It's hard to get I'm started"
Mary grabbed UP her pet and fed
home to her mother. who had Mr..
Murphy arrested. He was dismissed
when the court learned that Mary's
lamb had weathered the adventure
unscathed.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
OLD PARROT WELLS MURDER"
Alone, Two Men Are
Locked Up.

Philadelphia, Pa.-Two policemen
were startled at the Delaney street
station the other morning when they
heard shrieks of Murder" They
rushed across to $40 South Front
street, and there found Joseph Kaluk,
aged twenty-four, with his abdomen
slit and two men just about to leap
over the rear fence.
Standing on a chair near the man
believed to be dying was an old green
parrot, with wing broken, 1t is
thought, in the ARRAY.
TIE police caught Alexander Kun
DIRE and Joseph Betinsky and they
we're brought back to the house where
Kaluk lay unconscious. The mo-
ment the parrot saw the two men 1t
again broke into shrill cries Of MUIR
DER"
On the evidence of the bird alone
the prisoners were locked up without
bail to await the result of Kaluk's in
iuries.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

making his meaning clear, after which
the examination proceeded without
serious difficulty. Mrs. BaAt declared
she had no enmity against Mr.. Ander-
son. but she said she was through
with Mrs. Anderson for life.
Il don't play no ragtime."' she de-
clared. The nearest come to that
is Kelly and that's a grand old
tune"
Mrs Babt discoursed at length on
Mr.. Anderson's ability as a cornet-
tist She said she didn't mind the
cornet. In fact, she averred with
some show of feeling that she loves
music.
"Of course" said Mrs. Babt, I've
never had any chance to play any
myself / Just know I'd a been a
grand musicianer. The only music
ever played was on washboard.
So | saved up what could and
bought me a phonograph and this is
the thanks get"
The Judge finally disposed OF the
matter by telling Mrs. Babt to go
home and make her peace with her
neighbors.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

HHICAGo.-Nicholas Murphy. 1102
~ West Forty-Seventh street, was
hailed before the Englewood police
court the other day for INDUCING in
what might properly be termed q
lamb stew"
Mr.. Murphy, bound on zigzag
course for the next saloon. CHANGED
TO pass the home Of Mrs Katherine
Klina, 5121 South Robey street, when
he saw a snow-white animal gambol-
ing on the green. Mr.. Murphy was
lonesome and longed for a COM
panion.
Bulldog" muttered Mr.. Murphy.
as he chung to the fence for a closer
inspection. Always I've wanted a
bulldog. and that's a beauty"
Mr.. Murphy sauntered into the yard
and cut the rope by which the animal
was tethered. Then he led II frisking
gaily down the street Through the
swinging doors of the first saloon he
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

toward the householder. He yawned
carelessly. and described a lightning
half-circle with his tail
The householder sought the outer
air Immediately. without stopping to
inquire into the disposition OF the
animal with the teeth. He entered
the kitchen two jumps ahead of the
hired cook
A few minutes later Mrs. Hogan's
two sons. Charles and Homer, had ar
rived in response to a hurried tele-
phone call. Allie was taken home
and put back In his tank.
"Oh. yes, alligators make lovely
pets, once you get used to them"
says Mrs. Hogan. But there are lots
Of persons who can never get used
to themi"
The householder and the cook are
inclined to agree with the last part
Of Mrs. Hogan's statement
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
coNDoLA es VrNIcr

Other gondolas glide silently past you,
and perhaps now and then a barge
loaded with fruit or fish, propelled
by the one long oar In the hands OF a
swarthy Venetian. But you are rudely
awakened from your reverie by the
shrill whistle Of an impertinent little
steamboat. It seems like an anach-
ronism, and one resents its presence.
These boats now run between the
railway station and the Adriatic sea.
In them one can 60 out to the Lido,
the famous Venetian seaside resort;
to the great Venetian glass works and
other places. Now and'then speedy
motor boat will dash by you, and you
shake your fist at its departing stern.
and wish 1t would sink.
Then with a sudden turn to the
right you enter labyrinth Of smaller
canals. so narrow, some OF them. that
you can almost touch the houses on
either side with outstretched hands.
AS you approach a sharp turn, the
gondolier shouts a warning, answered
by another boatman, and presently
a long black prov energies slowly and
cautiously into view. With perfect
ease the two boats pass each other
In this narrow space. never touching
nor humping. The gondoliers have
perfect control over them and handle
the long unwieldly things perfectly.
These back canals are charming. al
though, one must confess. they are
sometimes rather smelly, and there is
danger of having the days garbage
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
PET GATOR GOES ].
OUT FOR A LARK
Reptiles Owner Says "Allie"
Never Bites Anyone.
NEVER HAD A CHANGE
But Women Run, and Strong Men
shudder and Flee at Sight OF Mrs.
Eoaan's "Baby"-AIso Made Tee
totalers Of Two Men.

New Orleans, La.-Alligators make
lovely pets. Mrs. J. J. Hogan, 5SO9
Quinby avenue. says so. And she has
kept oIe around the house for IL
years.
His name is Allie" and he is z
mere child, as alligators go. But AZ
ready he is about FIVE feet long. and
his teeth are very business-like.
But Allie never bites anyone" ex-
plains Mrs. Hogan. We've never
given him a chance"
Allie lives in a little concrete tank
in the Hogans' back yard. II there
are no strangers about. he will climb
out of the tank and waddle around
the yard. But when a stranger in
vades his domain, Allie scuttles to
the tank and vanishes beneath the
murky water.
He is afrsid of strangers" says
Mrs. Hogan. Hes only II years ed.
a little timid as yet"
No matter how timid Allie may be.
a sight Of these teeth is enough to
make the average person unwilling to
brighten him.
II Is so much easier for Allie to
brighten the stranger.
About a month ago Allie climbed
over the back fence and began to tour
the neighborhood After sending sew
eral children into spasms and making
teetotalers of two men, he slid down
the cellar steps Of home near by.
Early the next morning a cook came
down into the cellar. singing under
her breath She was in search OF
some potatoes for breakfast. Once
she was inside the cellar, however.
she lost all thought of vegetables.
Her mind was fully occupied with the
animal kingdom.
Just as the entire neighborhood was
thoroughly awakened by her cries. the
owner of the house came down stairs
with the family shotgun. He looked
once at the alligator. and broke into
laughter.
why, that's nothing to be afraid
of, Mary he said. That's nothing
but Mrs. Hogan's old alligator. He
won't hurt you"
At this juncture the perfectly harm
less alligator waddled a few steps
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Green Beans and Sausage.

Chop fine one pint of cooked green
beans. Season with half a teaspoon
each of salt and pepper. and place a
layer in the bottom of deep au gratin
dish. Pour In one cup of milk Prick
the casing Of one pound OF sausage
and lower them in frying basket in
to kettle Of boiling water; count
sixty. then remove and dispose over
the potatoes. Pour over a cup of thick
white sauce and the remainder Of the
beans, with layer of cracker crumbs
on top. Let bake for about fifteen
minutes Serve for luncheon or sup
per.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

away to the coal shed. Hans nursed
the turtle, applying ointments and
plasters for several days. but 1t finally
turned it's shell to the ground and 1t
was all over The next day neighbors
saw all the members of the Hanson
family, the father, mother, two boys
and a girl, with bowed heads near the
turtle pond. After the funeral was
over this epitaph was found painted
on a square block over the turtles
grave: Turtle Hanson, borned-don't
know when-died July 10 at the hands
Of cruel dog who bit him to death.
It was q good
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
SERVES HOT MEALS TO PIG
Lonesome Mother Dog, After Losing
Puppies, Adopts squealy Infant;
Tries to "clVillxe" Il.

Chicago.-Pigs is pigs. dirty.
squealy and grunty, but q perfectly
clean, self-respecting lady dog was
not familiar with their habits. She
adopted one and now IL having the
time of her life trying to teach 1t to
be a good puppy.
Caro- is the lady dog. Her family
tree would make a good showing be-
side that of any other bull terrier
family. The pig-well, the pig has
no name other than Piggie, and no
ancestors to boast about. Both are
owned by Paul Sommer, a saloon
keeper on South Halsted street.
When death robbed the mother dog
of eight puppies a few weeks ago she
whined so pitifully that Mrs. Sommer
tried to find other puppies for her.
She failed. but that day Piggie, ten
days old, squeezed through a hole In
the fence.
When the Sommer family looked
out the back door the following day
they saw Caro- nursing the pig and
fondling It as though II were her
own. The pig was duly purchased
for her, and ever since then the
mother dog has been troubled.
Whenever Piggie Is not nursing.
which is most of the time. II lies
down in the milk pan and then tries
to root under the barn. Each morn
ing Caro- ticks of her adopted child.
1t is spick and span and clean. as q
puppy should be. but an hour later
the operation has to be repeated.
It's an endless job. trying to make 4
clean puppy of a careless pig.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Eaaless Cookies.

Here is & recipe for fine cookies
that need no eggs and will keep for
weeks in closed jar. One large cup
of butter and lard mixed. one cupful
sugar, one cupful molasses, one-half
cupful water, one tablespoonful of
ginger, one of cinnamon, one tea
spoonful of cloves, one teaapoonful of
soda and -four for stiff dough. Roll
thinner than for sugar cookies. Pour
over the soda a little boiling water
before using it, II your dough is
mixed properly. the cookies will be
shiny and spicy when done. This
recipe will make five dozen.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

n - ODERN means of locomotion
MM on the Grand canal in Venice
W have been stubbornly fought
IL" for some time by the Vene-
tian gondoliers, but this
seems about to be overcome by the
formation of a cooperative society
among these boatmen. This body is
providing a public service Of small
motor launches between the railway
station and the Adriatic shore. They
maintain that the launches can be
used by those in a hurry, while the
gondolas will be retained for the use
Of the leisurely pleasure seekers.
But why should anyone be in
hurry in Venice? 1t is a place to
dream and rest. One of the greatest
attractions In this most picturesque
city on all the continent is to Toll back
in a gondola and glide slowly down
the Grand canal. That first ride one
never forgets. It is as IL he had been
transported into an altogether differ
emit world. for everything is strange. un-
familiar. AS the boat proceeds leisure
ly along the stately old palaces. with
the high poles with the colors of their
owners painted on them, add to the
charm. They are ancient and many
are in rather dilapidated condition.
but that makes them seem all the
more picturesque. 1t is fitting that
they should be.
Many Great Palaces.
Here, the gondolier tells you, is the
Palazzo of Desdemona, beautiful old
place crowded in between two larger
palaces; there is the palace of the
Brownings, one OF the stateliest on the
canal; over there is where the famous
Duse once lived. but her palace, prob
ably discouraged Of having been de-
serted by the great celebrity, leans
disconsolately against its neighbor,
and seems ready to plunge into the
waters of the canal. And SO as you
slip along to the sweep of the one
great oar Of the gondolier. you see pal
aces of great dukes and duchess, OF
poets, writer's and many others.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
CAUGHT 80 Rat. in One Night.

vandergrift, Pa--Clarence Bow
man has established record by trap
ping 80 rats in one night. Procuring
an iron tub, he placed It in one Of
their favorite haunts and partly filled
It with bran, literally feeding the
rats for a few days. Then he half
filed the tub with water and scat
tered a liberal layer OF bran over
this. The next morning he found the
tub black with drowned rats.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Onk Music She Ever Played Was on dashboard

N ETROIT, MICH.-Mrs. William
~ Babt Is a militant purveyor OF
music as she is interpreted through
the phonograph. Mrs. Babt says her
instrument is some machine" and
she further declares she'll play 1t
whenever she sees At 80 to do. COM
plants from the neighbors notwith-
standing.
Hardening TO lengthy lament
from some of the woman's neighbors,
Police Justice Stein had Mrs. Babt
in court the other day, while VIII
liam Anderson, himself a cornetist
OF no mean ability, appeared as rep
resentative Of the indignant neighbor-
hood
Judge, she plays that confounded
photograph all night long," said An
derson.
NO, stree. don't" said Mrs. Babt.
who had her husband with her to
lend whatever moral support he
sould. Il 60 to bed with the chick
ems. That's why I've lived such a
long and useful life"
The Judge exhibited some curiosity
as to the kind Of music the instru-
ment disgorged and Mrs. Babt was
quick to say that she at all times
eschewed rag time and chung largely
to the classics.
DO you play "Cavaleria Rusti-
cana?" asked the Judge.
Sir" said Mrs. Babt, Indignantly,
drawing herself to her full height,
I'D have you understand that l
never rush the can"
The Judge had some difficulty In
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
MOTHER FORGETS HER
BABE IN THE STREET
Child Left on Curb by Absent
Minded Parent Is Restored
by Policeman.

Chicago.-Policeman Michael Nc
Keough the other afternoon stood at
West Madison and Halsted streets
and watched a woman place four
small children on a street car and
leave a fifth, a three-year-old girl.
crying on the curb.
"Aha!" quoth the limb Of the law.
"'Tis a case of child abandonment.
I'll show that woman she can't do
that sort of work while I'm on this
beat"
Taking the child in his arms Nc
Keough strobe to the middle Of Hal
sted street and halted an approach
ing automobile.
Speed her up and go south in Hal
sted street as fast as you can" he
ordered DR.. c. A. Lewis, who was
driving the automobile.
With the child. now crying. in his
arms. the policeman jumped into the
machine and the trio sped southwark.
When the automobile drew up be-
side the first car McKeough stood
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Olive Salad.

Mash two anchovies and add them
to French dressing. Stone "a olives
and chop them rather fine. Cut one
boiled potato and one boiled beet into
dice. Chop e small cucumber pickle.
Line salad bowl with lettuce leaves,
sprinkle over the gherkin. then the
olives, then the beet and potato
Dust with salt. paprika and white
pepper. Chop two hard boiled eggs
very fine and place them over the
top. Sprinkle lightly with three table
spoonfuls Of sherry wine. pour over
the French dressing, toss and serve.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

fective compartment The singers
can sing. too, grand opera and |p's
songs composing their repertoire
When one song has been nn'sa'a
the gondoliers shout for their iaFQ'i's
song. for these swarthy boatmen sen
to enjoy the singing as much q g
their passengers. Presently %.
descends from the singers Gran az
steps from gondola 10 gondola. 1r.'
bag in his hand. You hear the ems
ing Of coins, and when be gets % YoN
boat you drop few centisimi into p
well filed bag. This Is repeated tD'F
or four times, but altogether you q
not squander more than ten or ni'ef
cents in American money. Eou ro''
not begrudge three times that amon4
When one of the gondolas By *
side of the concert leaves there I
a scramble to get its place. the 81
doliers manipulate their boats s''
fully, and perhaps your man. y
quick twist, gets you into the eofes
place. II seems to be coveted DI T
boatmen, but in reality 1t Il no'
good as being farther away.
All the gondolas are painted plA'
and are just alike. II IL said that 2
Of the old Doges Of Venice. nn% :
that many Of the wealthy MOBILES y.
obtaining gondolas much more e,'S
rate than he could afford, made Z
that all except 57ls own shoe''
painted a modest black. and tha'
tom has come wn to the pr
day.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

MotorBodf
Displacin'e
GondoId

dumped from an upper windo~
your lap. But you do not mind M.
you glide beneath many bridge. =,
slip past the old. old houses ~.
the window gaily decorated with A.
ers. You gaze in wonder and asn',.
ton at the picturesque old place. =,
perhaps black eyed signorIns -.
from a window and drops rose ~
your boat, and smiles.
At night the charm Of Ven,c.
even greater. Then it seems M.
veritable dream city: but wIthoal &.
gondolas it might be nightmare s.
out on the Grand canal one can {.
two or three concert boats, decnr...,
with Japanese lanterns. and On 4.
still air comes snatches Of old lt,l|..
love songs. You listen a few 49,
utes. and then, with nod 70 W.
companion, you get up from your ek,h
on the hotel gallery and signal tor
gondola- Silently it slips IN to A.
steps leading into the water; you IA.
into it and sink by the side Of ,bs,
companion deep into the cushion.
seats in perfect luxury. Never 20 ,ul
alone.
La musica," you say. II your III
ian vocabulary is very limited IL
soon the long, black prov IL poinet,
toward the fairy-like boats. Ycu s,l
in contentment- AS you slip alons
the lights Of St. Marks square VIM
gaily. Small lights on the water hs,.
and there show that other boats a.
going to the concert Everything /,
silent and serene. only the sound &
the music breaking the stiffness n.
gondolier stands majestically behind
you, making long sweeps with his O.,
The sound Of the music grows pIain.'
and soon beneath the string oi lsn
terms a black barge looms up.
Hundreds Of gondolas. It seems an
lined up around this boat b skI||'
maneuvering your gondolier slides h
between two ether boats. And tlAn
you just stretch back and listen to II,
singers. the water sloshing and LAP
ping against the boats making Al &.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Chocolate sIrup.

Melt four squares Of unsweetened
chocolate and add one and three-quar-
tiers cups Of sugar and one-eighth of
a teaspoon Of salt, then pour on
gradually, while stirring constantly.
one and one-half cups of boiling water.
Stir until smooth. Bring to the boil
ing point and boil five minutes. Cool
and turn ints Jar. Keep in the ice
box TO use az needed.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
custard PUDDING.

Three tablespoonfuls of cornstarch
wet in enough cold water to dissolve
it, and pinch of salt. Pour over it
one pint OF boiling water. Cook FIVE
minutes, stirring constantly. Add the
whites of three eggs, beaten to a stiff
froth. Wet a mold In cold water and
pour the mixture in. Make custard
of the yolks Of three eggs, one-half
cupful Of sugar. and one cupful Of
milk Let it come to a boil, but do
not allow 1t to curdle. Flavor and
when ready to serve. turn the white
part onto a platter and pour the Gus
tard around 1t.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Boiled Salad Dressing.

Three eggs. one teaspoon mustard.
two teaspoons salt, pinch of cayenne,
two tablespoons sugar, two table
spoons melted butter, one teacup
cream, one teacup vinegar. Beat yolks
well, then add dry ingredients, then
add the cream, then butter and the
beaten whites. Have vinegar warm,
not hot, and add above mixture. Slow
ly stir all together in double boiler to
thickness of boiled custard. 1t will
take about Is minutes. Will keep for
weeks in covered glasses.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Tortured Doe a Suicide.

Clearneld, Pa.-With wildcat on
her back, ripping her neck and weak
ened by the loss of blood. a big doe
killed herself and the cat, near here.
when she ran in front OF fast NOV
ing train and stood on the track our
city awaiting death and relief from
her tormentor. Before the heavy train
could be brought to a standstill the
life of the doe and her enemy had
been snuffed out.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24

is, therefore. the habit Of being 2
cientIy satisfied with yourself
you are awake, so that you reed
care whether you sleep or not ?
last best cure is the ability % 2
interested in yourself wnen you
awake that you win prefer noE
sleep.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
aoood pay.s

"Doppel. I've been hoping shai .
would pay me back that $40 70. =
rowed from me six months ago
well. all I can say TO you :
now. Friend Biggs. is that you.
timistic nature does you credit r
comes my car"
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
Bets on snalI,.

New York.-Passengers on the liner
France. arriving here, found real sport
In betting on snail races. The win
ming snail established a record of
three hours over an 1s-inch course
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
bee Kind.

"A young man does not alVay'
gin well by getting an openips'
why not?"
Because in getting it he m.sn' =
himself in a hole"
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-10-24
pl.e, =. Hadn't Looked.

After searching SO hours
lost horse" AL Stevens Of ne" ~
discovered that the animal haa
ed upstairs In the loft