The Ocala banner. (Ocala, Marion County, Fla.) 1883-194?, 1913-01-17
ETIQUETTE

i, that they have been discouraged
,atalv in the matter of giving large
entertainments, because the careless
habit which prevails here of men and
women. young and old, not replying
20 invitations, makes it impossible
Cor a hostess to make the necessary
orrangements which precede a large
entertainment, especially if it be in
the private residence.
Even If the entertainment happens
n he at the club, the plan of the en-
.artainment has to be given to the
ona in charge. and the first question
e GLOW many will there be?"
The hostess knows how many she
hoe invited. but sometimes until the
moment she receives her guests she
docs not know how many are coming,
for as many as two-thirds frequently
neglect to reply.
Now it does seem impossible that
in this day and generation there could
be any women ignorant of the fact
that a written or engraved or printed
invitation requires reply.
Whether or not a woman is the so
called society" woman. whether or
not she entertains if she lives in a
house in a community, she should
have in that house a pen and ink and
&c hut
sion of civilization that when she re-
ceives a cordial invitation she should
reply TO il: that the one who sent it
may not suspect the postoffice is at
fault or that the communication has
been lost between the front door and
the lady's desk.
The lady's desk IS just as much
part OF her equipment as her dressing
table or her bureau or her wardrobe,
and nothing more markedly distin-
cuisines the lady than her carefulness
of the little amenities which are real
" more a matter of inheritance and
breeding than of cultivation.
II, in the case of the woman whose
early training at home has lacked
the early instruction that we'll post
ed mother gives her daughters, which
is a matter deserving Of pity rather
than scOrn, any girl who has attended
the common schools has been taught
how to reply to a note of invitation;
therefore there seems really no eX-
cuse for the carelessness complained
of by those who give large entertain
ments
II is carelessness, everybody
knows, and the irregular and restless
habits that modern women are get
ting into causes their neglect of the
courtesy due invitations, but it brands
society as very superficial and aim
less when women have not time to
attend to their business pertaining to
il. and when society ceases to repre-
sent the medium through which men
and women appear at their best and
TO their best
Women should try to have their
mornings to themselves. In the case
of their having the responsibility of
housekeeping. it is very rare that
they can look after all the little
things before the noon hour, and
among the little things should come
the care of and responsibility of the
writing desk. True, bills-awful bills
are there but even they taken hold
of Systematically. lose some of their
unpleasant quality, and there are the
invitations to be looked after. There
too is the polite query from the char
liable institution, maybe the public
office or community meeting, and Dor
ing as these latter communications
may be, it is the business of the wo-
man receiving them to reply TO them
with courtesy. 1t expresses what she
is. what she feels and what she rep
resents.
When the important position of a
N~AAs oONAtliAs VI OlAiCA W iSCs So
heaps her mail on her desk that she
cannot handle it, then that woman
should have a secretary. The sec
Rotary need not be a permanent insti-
tuition, but one who can come when
needed-but really there is probably
no woman in Pensacola, Who if she
is a good manager and stays at home
long enough, cannot we'll handle her
social correspondence.
Although it is the younger element
OF society who are charged more con
unuously with this Indifference To ct
lquette, it is the mothers who are to
blame. If daughters were impressed
Alright by seeing what mothers do in
this direction. they would follow the
good example