Mexico Missouri message., 1913-12-25

ror, and then suddenly she threw back
her head and laughed.
"Minnie!" she said, between fits,
"Mlnnie As long as live I'll never
| forget that wretched boys face! And
the sand boxes! And the blankets
over the windows! And the tarpaulin
over the raftersl And Mr.. Van Al
styne sitting on the lawnmower I'D
rather have had my minute In that
doorway than fifty thousand dollars!"
IF you had had to carry out all
those things" l began, but she
| checked me.
'Listen!" she said Somebody with
brains has got to take you young peo-
| pie in hand. You're not able to look
after yourselves. I'm fond OF Alan
| Pierce, for one thing, and don't care
to see a sanatorium that might have
| been the child of my solicitude kid
naped and reared as a summer hotel
by Papa Thoburn. A good fat man is
very, very good, Minnie. but when he
| Is bad he is horrd."
IT'S too late" l objected feebly.
"He can't get 1t now"
Cant he!" She got up and yawned
stretching. well, I'll lay you ten to
one that IL we don't get busy he'll have
the house empty in thirty-slx hours,
and a bill OF sale on It in as many
days" Then she told me what she
knew of Thoburn's scheme. and 1t
turned me cold
Doctor Barnes came to me at the
news stand the next morning before
gymnasium.
Well" he said, you look as busy
as dog with fieas. Have you heard
the glad tidings?"
"What?" l asked without much spir
It. i've heard considerable tidings
lately, and not much OF 1t has cheered
me up any"
He leaned over and ran his fingers
up through his hair.
"'You know, Miss Minnie" he said
somebody ought kindly to kill our
friend Thoburn. or he'll come to bad
end"
shall l do 1t, or will your" said
| filling up the chewing gum jar (Mr
Pierce had taken away the candy
case)
Doctor Barnes glanced around to
see II there was anyone near. and
leaned farther over.
THE cupboard isn't empty now!" he
said mot for nothing did | spend
part of the night in the Dicky-bird q
nest! What do you think is in the
cupboard?"
81 know about it," said Shortly.
'Liquor-in a case labeled Books
breakable.'"
Almost a goal. But not only liquors,
my little friend. Champagne-cases of
it--caviar, canned grouse with truf-
fles. lobster, cheese, fine cigars, every
thing you could think of, erotic, eX-
otto and narcotic. An orgy in cans
and bottles, a bacchanalian revel; a
cupboard full of indigestion, Joy, for
getfulness and katzenjammer Oh, my
suffering palate. to have to leave It all
without one sniff, one sip, one nibble!" "
He's wasting his money" 1 said
They're all crazy about the simple
life."
He looked around and, seeing no one
in the lobby, reached over and took
one OF my hands.
Strange" he said. looking at it.
NO webs, and yet it's been an amphi.
bious little creature most OF it's life,
My dear girl, our friend Thoburn is a
rascal, but he is also a student OF
mankind and a philosopher. Gee," he
said, think of a woman fighting her
way alone through the world with bit
OF fist like that!"
| jerked my hand away.
tits like this, my dear" he said
Human natures curious thing. It's
human nature, for instance, for me to
be crazy about you, when you're as
hands-otfish as a curly porcuplne. And
1t is human nature, by the same token
TO like to be bullied, especially about
health, and to respect and admire the
fellow who does the bullying. That's
why We we're crazy about Roosevelt
! and that's why Pierce is trailing his
kingly robes over them while they lie
on their faces and eat dlrt-and
stewed fruit"
} he reached for my hand again, but
put It behind me.
But alas" he said, there is another
side TO the human nature, and our
friend Thoburn has not kept a sum
mer hotel for nothing. 1t is notorious
ly weak. especially as to stomach. You
may feed 'em prunes and whole-wheat
bread and apple sauce, and after Q
J while they'll forget the fat days, and
remember only the lean and hungry
! ones. But let some student Of human
T nature at the proper moment Introduce
, just one fat day, one feast, one
reYel--"
Talk English" said sharply.
Don't break in on my flights Of
fancy" he objected. IF YOU wan
: the truth, Thoburn Is going to have &
party-a forbidden feast. He's goint
10 rouse again the sleeping dogs OF ap
; petite, and send them ravening bacl