Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1913-01-31

The second man followed quickly.
m"ttering: 9TH sea ceaseth and it sur
ficeth us"
The man with the spiel about Smiths
spirit flask and the sixth sisters SPUR
rel's skulls Went next and forgot to
say good night.
~ amt goin home at ALL" cheer
fun. remarked the little man with side
Whlskers who stood down by the Glove
dish. I'm five minutes l won't be able
to say ginseng and l can't say jim
rIrksha now with amy degree of sue
cess
WOMEN'S MATCHES.
Two things i'm this world are never
right.
One Is the tariff and the other is a
wOman'S watch.
There is nothing better thar a won,-
ans watch to throw at Il cat, to crack
hickory nuts. to let the baby cut it's
teeth on. to use as a Sinker on Il tish-
line. tn use as a bucker i'm a poker
game, to hang on the end OF "A watch
chain to keep ii i'm the pocket or TO
drive carpet tacks with. but as a time
hreper 1T is as unreliable as u cam
paign manager ON the day before cleo
ton.
A woman's watch is fun of artistic
temperament. You can go away from
home and stay siN months and come
back and find it running. but If you
want it to he sure and run for three
hours while YOU arc on an automo-
bile trip YOU have got to- wind ii every
five minutes and then shake it and
bang ii ON the door sill.
A woman's watch is always a half
hour too fast or a half hour too slow
and the woman never knows which.
In order To he perfectly sure she goes
ont and looks at the sun. but If the
sun isn't shining She takes the half
hour too fast and the half noun too
SLOW. adds them. mnltiplies by three,
subtracts seven and divides by IA.
then counts the number of buttons on
her husbands Vest and multiplies the
total by that and she will have the
time pretty close. a woman's method
of telling time by her own watch is
one of the great mysteries and every
one has n different method.
A woman doesn't care about the
works in u watch just SO long as II
has got a cute monogram on the case
and a diamond or two. The works
might just as We'll not hc there. There
| women have taken the works out OF
their watches and used the cases tn
carry toilet power. locks of hair and
swccthrarts photographs. 1T is the
case hat counts and the works have
nothing to do with the case. Some
day perhaps. some genius will invent
II wonlan's watch that will keep time
CORRECTLY. but they will never be popu-
lar with the women. The average
woman would rather guess at it. Then
il she finds she is right She can glory
in it and If she is wrong she can
change her guess.
Moments watches are a good deal
like women themselves. You can never
tell what they are going to do next.
FROM THE H1ckEYVII.I.E
CLARION.
MAJ ,:I .A4 =. -. 100
[crazy quilt for her uncle, who is in the
insane asylum. She is one of the best
~nitters i'm this man town.
Gale PrOuty. our jewelel and watch
maker. has got "A job regulating the
works in Hold Peters thrashin' ma
chine. Gale says he ear sleep at night
unless he hears a clock ticking.
should think he could get along just as
Well by listening to the bed tick.
Mrs. Hank Tllnms was chewing slip
perry ellum the other day when her low
er jaw Slipped out of joint. Nei.hbors
advocates having something done about
it, but Hanks says there amt no par
ticular hurry.
Mrs. Arson I'risby is takin' them arts
and gratis lessons from down to the
city, anG at present is poundin' a $40
brooch out of one Of AnSe'S brass suS-
|pendcr buttons.
Miss Lutte Bibbins is making an up
~ ~ Y'>tt' " C'' siii Nv liz I III
hammick she had on the side porch last
|SuIlmer.
Mrs. Ansen Ifrisby has got a rubbc
tired trap at this writing. but we amt
seen her catch anything in it yet.
Colonel Fri bought some chestnuts
Off a dago down to the city the other
day. IT seems as though he ought to
p~atronize hoine industries II get the
chestnuts here at home by taking the
Clarion.
Miss Euphcmia Nudge. our only
NasSah graduate. went over to West
~Hickeyville yesterday to attend the rah
rah game.
tincle Ezra Harllins had chicken for
dinner yesterday. and Constable Ezra
Hand is working on The case with only
a slight clew.
A move is on to pave Main street.
Some foh favor Cedar blocks and
others wa asphalt. while stih others
who are fnEh toned want to find some
new kind OF pavement no town in this
Vicinity has got Most of the delin-
quent subscribers of this town will find
a new kind all right when they get to
the place that is paved with good in
,tentiOns.
Hank Tuinms, who has been ailing
FOR some time. had a diagnosis Of
physicians on him the other day and
they decided he was suffering from
~spongeltis. He had an operation seven
Years 9 and whe the doctors got