The Birmingham age-herald., 1913-06-15
The Beauties OF Pre0dricdtion
by KARL KAFFER

=
colonel; it's just a little matter of con-
ventionality," said the family friend.
Suppose | asked you something you
didn't care to tell me. You wouldn't tell
me 1t was none of my business, would
you? Why, no. Only crude and ILL
bred persons do that. You'd simply say
you didn't know or you would politely
evade the question.
TITS the same way with our women
folks"
"In our grandfathers' times people told
the truth" persisted the colonel
There wasn't so much of this tommy
rot about people telling lies and calling
it roliteness! BY Jinks, there wasn't"
"But my dear colonel" said the poet,
'in this day we must recognize the dis
tinction between the obsolete and the
regnant and
"Yassuh, dat sho is fack," put in the
interested Zeke. who. in Jealous defense
of his absent mistress, forgot himself SO
far as to break into the conversation.
"En sides all dat Miss Susan en- Miss
Feely dey be's a-makin peach perserbes;s
en- Miss Feely she done burnt one NV 'er
thumbses, EN-" well, what if that?"
said the colonel
Now IL had been in my wife's place,
I'd have sent this message ladies, l am
very busy making peach preserves, and
| my, niece has burnt her thumb. 1t is most
excuse u.s..
Now who in the nation could take ex-
ception at that?"
i, .'But Marse Randolph" said the worried
Zeke, Miss Susan. she blong ter de quail
ity en- she halter be perlite. En- aint at
home dat sounds more perliter dan peach
perserbes.'"
The laugh was on the colonel. though
zeke's implication as to quality was quite
| unintentional.
"ln my opinion. Zeke has the right of
it, said the poet.
II knew a woman once-a plain, country
woman-with two nieces.
zone of them prided herself on telling
the truth She did 1t until 1t grew into
a deadly habit
THAT girl was as reliable as a granite
| block. and just about as good company.
To be perfectly untruthful. everybody
loved her.
well | was amused at the difference
between the sisters, and / wrote little
piece about them"
| Being urged by the others to recite the
| piece, the poet kindly obliged. saying he
would give it in the words of the country
aunt
| 1t ran something like this:
| ANN AND RUTH
| Ann, she's terribly addicted to just
| speakn' the plain truth, and her sisters
| talent lies the other way. She can al
| ways keep from telling things. can little
sister, Ruth, when it's something that
she doesn't wanter say.
Now, I know my bonnet's old, but it's
all the one We got. so I asked Ann Does
| 1t look too bad to wear?" Yes, 1t does"
said Ann. Then little Ruth she spoke up
| like shot:
| "Itll look as nice as any bonnet
there."
The preserves was just tiny bit fer
mented at Mrs. Frye's. where the girls
! had been invited to take tea.
| "Ain't they sour?" asked the hostess
Eyes, little" Ann replies. Spoke up
Ruth They're just as nice as they
| can be!'
Granpa Rays horse throwed him off
once broke his back most when he fell;
and he's very sensitive bout being lame.
"Granpa. mind now: don't you walk too
fast" said Ann. a-meaning we'll
What a joke," laughed Ruth; He's
| spryer than I am"
| If you ask Ann bout what amt none
/ of your business, she will say, Does
| that concern you dear, or does 1t not?'
| But If you ask Ruth. she will answer,
just as bright and gay. What did 1t
cost? Dear me! I've clear forgot"
| OF course it's sinful to tell lies, and
| right to tell the truth: that is fack
that has TO be confessed.
| Ann always stuck to yea and nay"
not so with little Ruth-Set Ruth 1t was
that got along the best.
| The minister came courtin,-and made
sure twas Ann. Good laud, how l did
worry and contrive to get them two to-
getf1er! And then that blessed man, he
went and married Ruth, as I'm alive!