The Washington times., 1913-02-07
The Wine
Agent

-NAf, 90 you ever dre4m! Con-
ME asked with reminiscent
terror In her violet eyes.
"Eh-huh. Do your
DO 7? say, the dreams I've been
havin' this past week "a give the Statue
Nv Liberty st. vitus' dance! II could
only remember 'em I'd have the felier
Edgar Allan Poe iashed to the mast Ter
real chill producers. But can't remem-
Der EN- All know ID. ! wake up with
the bedcothes stransiin' me In Q ma
sonic grin, an find myself with the
ruffle NV my boudoir cap under the left
hind caster NV the bed. an my little
tootsies pointin' to the border Nv yell
Ter roses what runs around the moidinG
In my room. An with z thirty-mile gale
givin' a imitation uvNa refrigeratin'
plant through the window that amt the
cosiest little pose to be caught inr
Nonsense! How do you ever get UN-
DER the eastern derided.
Search me! Gosh. II may be lucky
I DO get anchored to somethin'. Sup
pose ] got fussy an did q little tango
step out NV the easement one Nv them
nights! We dwell on the fourth floor
And right beneath my window Is q
choice heap Nv chopped milk bottles.
Ugh"
stop eating before VOC 20 to bed.
Then YOU won't dream. When you eat
q whole lot Of trash right before Sleep
ing, what do you expect?'
Eat nothin'r' she retorted in dis
gust Il ail't ct at night for year. Il
seems to me. Gee. The seasons dull.
Why. I amt run up against nothin'
more noisy'n q bottle NV domestic GIN
ger ale since last October.
mo. my sleeps sufferin' from ar
this Job / been trained different. Eats
late at night has always been neces-
sary to me, an | got 'em reg'lar until
] ran into the wine agent That crab
apple wuz certainly the original Wee
hawken Straight. His CLOWN promise
wuz worth two raises. An after the
draw. gee. I'd a swapped him cheerful
fer a healthy spring onion!
"Once upon a time when girl said
she had a wine agent Ter n friend.
everyone what knew herd get bpsy
polishin' up their undyin' love for her.
an remember the time they lent her
money, But after I'd had q three weeks
try-out with one Nv the troupe I knew
ali this gas bout them carryin around
ready stocked jewel cases an complete
Paris trousseauX, WE dream stun.
Why, say, I came near cashin' In when
/ Travelled with niIn-uN StdrNdtiOn, TOO.
An there wuzn't a night NV my life
didn't decorate real hlagreed eat
factory neither. Sounds woozy. iont
it?'
''It wuz this way: This guy wus
workin' for a swell firm. Nothin' un-
der Ave dollar stuff. An he hypnotized
me in the beginnin by saytn' that the
most disagreeable thing I'd nave to do.
while KNOWN him. would be 10 help
him absorb. In some way. bout four
quarts a night Well, Nv course that
listened like harps an angels to me.
thinkin' NV all. the frescoed food that'd
match them liquid panels!
The first night he opened three little
non-refiliabIes an smoked two packs
NV cigarettes Not so much as a oyster
cracker on the table. The second night
wuz lust like the first An the third
time, this shine asks me do / want a
demi tasse before I take my wine. A
demi tasse! Me. With nothin' dense in
nv stomach since a slice NV liver at
T:So a. m, dee-clined. An the fourth
night he didn't mention even tooth
pick.
'.The thing that got on my nerves
wuz the way the danes at the other
tables'd look at me like ! wuz the pet
canary NV gold mine! As one bottle
after another'd come to US they'd kick
their meal tickets under the table to