Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1913-05-12

are prominently and cqHspj uous!y-
ling with the tariff. were tire guests
ECridiron club. WgShjngfon : HeWspaiG'
a political. trayesty which. :whfIe dealt
+ vas sufficiently flied with QHits and
rpon which The present administration
+ State unless care is used and. the bra
The New Yorl, Herald carr s.thG
:Tinkering the Tar.If. or Once
Aboard the Free List and Wortd"ls
Z Ours =. T.. =......:
/ This is the titlc Of Il thr-r-~ijling
melodrama which President wilson
Yitnessed at the dinner ol the Grid
iron Club tonight Ills passion for the
/ iheater should have been satisfied. In
! edition To the melodra ma. in Whi2I
Oscar Underwood the brave ycun%
coast guard did a cutlass duel with
penrose Smoot tthe villain, in the
tower of the Old Democratic. Light
ith "Ofd Bill Bryan, lying. dead
! tdon't cheer. boys on fhn floor and
| Tariff. his daughter covering III fr>%ht
there was political travesty on Tie
Chimes of Normanv. WhichwIs about
IS clever s'Sit as could be. conf
4 y =
Every enc knows that tho Gr.dir01
! Club is an organization Of Washington
newspaper correspondents, who origin
ated the scheme of having stunts and
speeches between the courses instead
| If waiting until the guests are asleep.
! II was the presidents first Gridirou
dinner. All except one Of the menu
Ikers of the cabinet were there, most
of the men who are bulkin@ large in.
1 the political picture. bankers. editors
captains of industry. ambassadors ann
ministers and some plain ordinary
/ folk. about two hundred and fifty in
/ aH. President Wilson sat 81 thc right
/ Of Mr.. Rudolph Kaufman of the Wash
ington Star who is president of the
club Mr.. Bryan. the secretarT of
| state. was on his left Now fer the.
melodrama. -: %.>*. T.
| The Cast s..:..: : -. -.
! Characters >~.... {.
Old Riu Bryan. keeper of Democratic
Light. .s:..-@ ~. .-...
Tariff. his daughter, the faircst ma3;
that e'er nursed an infant industry
/ PenroCse Sfnoot. from the city
lmeaning villainl. =:.- i. -. III.
/ Oscar Underwood. a brave coast guard.
r4cl5c Smith, an honest fisherman. T..
| Rill McAdCo. a coast guard. r.. H..
Champ Clark, fisherman, also hen
i est - ~- ~. e.
| 4 property man. n messenger hoy, a
voice and an orchestra. -: -. i
The scene was the interior of Old
Democratic Light The wind whistled
/ around the tower every time the prop
! .rty man. who worked in full view of
! the audience. after tho Chinese man
rer. remembered to whistle it Enter
/ Hoke Smith. 'Tis a bitter night :,
The property man tossed I'D 4 >fandfu}
Of snow. "Rut it's = haDay dav for
! we simnle fisher folk For sixteen
wears Old Democratic Light has been
/ dark, but now Old Bill Bryaa's coming
lack to tend the light once more. -
Chamn Clark wande>rH in with 4
] crouch that is intensified a the news
81 never liked the fellow" he
i 5rowls. III. r.
. What did he do to you?" ~ *..=
/ 81 tried. to ride a trick mule once a.
Icaltimore and was inst about to Win
1.-The prize when Old Pill Bryan pa a
burr under the saddle" -. 49, ~. l..
/ Coast guards and fishermen drGpDcd
III. why was Democratic Light
coused in 1862" =.
"sIsck Coast for Black Deeds"
Mark Hanna wanted no light on
II Q Gold Coast *:= -.
ITS been black. coast for black
deeds. Look, The c.: o. p. liner IS
-
i mizzeutop of the brig Progressive
scarce shows above Pull Moose Shoal.
TIE swift clipper Uncle Joe, lies
Whitening on The strand. -. ".-:>:
But" saws Bill McAdoo, the wreck
crs are all gone now Ned before us
honest coast guards. T.. =.>... -:
"Re rot SO sure" adm0uishes iiolt
Smith Whom did see i'll Port Rev
). enue but today ........... Il =
Well Mr. Dockstader III. bite:
whom did YOU see in Port Revenue
| BIT. TODAY" 49,. H.. -.
"Pcnrosc SMOOTH business of
horror. T.. ....-*: -. ..
Net Penrose smoot, King of the
/ Wreckers?,, r.. -. -. -:
Bryan gcts=this. telegram Wi
:. liam J. Bryan. Democratic Light. Port
/ Revenge: BE sure. to start Demo
cratic Light tonight. The sailing
brig 7. Jefferson Platform, cut Of
Baltimore, is due with a cargo of
4 tariff revision, currency reform, trust
busters and miscellaneous ballast.
4 WOODROW WILSON. Owner j. H.
You were Captain Of the Platform
three times, weren't Nou,> Fathcr?'
asked Tariff IL. .-... .=>..... ..... IL:
Aye and three times wasl cast
away upon a desert island ~. -