davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
A Smart Man.

Various dishes in the Hungarian res.
taNrant We're numbered for the conven-
ience of the walters and the benefit OF
the patrons. A young couple entered
The orchestra struck up the "Wil.
liam Tell overture. Turning to her
escort, the young woman said: THAT'S
familiar What is it?'
The man glanced up at the orchestra
and saw the number displayed.
Then. with the air of one who is ac-
customed to cafe life, he looked up
No. on the bill of fare.
THAT" he replied when he had To-
Gated 1t, us 'Filet Mignon,' by Cham.
plgnons,"-New York Tribune.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Callss cured by Hanford's Balsam

Calks cured by Hanford's Balsam.
Misses Mamie Wright and Jesse
Branyan went to Indianapolis, lndi-
ana, Monday morning to spend the
week with Mr. and Mrs. Harry w.
Shaw.
Mr.. j. o. Wetsel and daughter, Miss
Grace, of Columbus visited with rela-
tives in the city Sunday. Miss Grace
will visit for a week with Mrs Burt
White.
Mir. and Mrs. Curtis Stevens return
ed to their home in Columbus Satur-
day afternoon after a visit with Mrs.
Caroline Tilton of North Main street
and Mrs. Helen Stevens of North Gay
street
For sprains rub on and rub in Han
ford's Balsam thoroughly One good
application is worth several light ones.
Mr.. Kenneth Adams, who has been
in the employ of the U. S. government
III the coast survey in the western
part of the United States and Alaska
during the past several months, is
making two weeks visit at. his nome
in Gambler. At the end of that time
he will leave for the PliifRpi4s
Islands. &.
Choice cut flowers and artistic
floral work. Charles H. Sharp.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
AMENDED SCHEDULES.

Hometimes we really feel afraid
This world is scheduled wrong;
Before we get the iceman paid
The coalnan comes along.
Peoria Journal
It's scheduled so we get shock
When frost we see about;
We put the summer suit in hook
To get the "bennie' out,
Cincinnati Enquirer.
It's scheduled so we want to pass
When fakes begin to fly.
For. though we burn but little gas.
The bill Jumps twice as high.
cleveland Plain Dealer.
It's scheduled so we long to live
In warmer climes afar,
But railroads do not passes give.
And we don't own car
Brooklyn Eagle,
The schedules punk" we are afraid.
This shows. of course, it's wrong:
Just after club dues you have paid
Your landlord comes along
-Yonkers Statesman.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
An Ant Illusion.

The idea OF mutual aid among ants
Is pronounced by NJ. Cornetz, French
entomoIogist, TO be an Illusion In his
observations, single ant drags a load
rapidly toward the nest, but when
Others take hold OF the object they
pan In different directions, and slow
progress Is made.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
An Incomplete Case.

"Have you anything to say in exten-
uation Of your conduct" asked the
judge.
"Nothln' in extenuation, judge. your
honor replied the prisoner, "but IL
you knowed all about this thing you
wouldn't blame me for what l done"
Chicago Record Herald
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
She knam.

Mrs. Knicker - Do you understand
baseball?
Mrs. Bocker-No, but | understand
Williams remarks to the umpire; iss
the same thing be says at breakfast =
Chicago Daily News.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Chanolno Timea.

Friend of the Up to Date Painters
Valet-You know, John, n COW never
looked that way.
Valet-They does look quite different,
Henry. But that's the way they're
painted these days.-Fliegende Blatter.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
To Entertain
4. II 4 i, i. i. i. i. x. :. j. 4. j. =
4 DEATHS +
i IL X i. \ i !. Il !. !. 4 i. j.
Mrs. Joseph MARBLE

Mrs. Joseph Marple died at her
home near Lock Saturday morning
after a several months illness of
paralysis. She was widow, 81 years
of age, and is survived by one son
and one daughter. The funeral at the
house Sunday afternoon at o'clock,
Rev. Bowden of Crofton officiating.
Interment in the cemetery at Lock.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Signs of the Times.

Proprietor-What would you suggest
as sign for first class secondhand
shop?
Sign Painter-How would up to
Date Antiques do?-Exchange.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
onlv Distinotion

"How do you tell those twin sisters
apart?"
"Why, when You kiss one of them
she always threatens to tell ma, and
the other one always says she'll tell
pa."-Stray Stories.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Not lJnsuaI.

Knicker-C Congress is to hold night
sessions on the tariff
Rocker Well, you are generally kept
up at night with infantile Industries
New York Sun.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Help to Paw the Bill.

She-I am going to order just about
everything on the bill of fare, What
are you going to call for?
He-i THINK I'll call for help.-Judge.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30

The gain OF lying is nothing else but
net TO be trusted any. more, nor to be
believed when we say the truth.-Sir
Bgalter Scott.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
give Buttons.

Chinese coats have five buttons, sig
nifying the five Confucian virtues
humanity. Justice. order. prudence anc
rectinl!e.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
Ancient Eayptia ms.

That the ancient Egyptians were NJ
negroes is certain, and it is equal
certain that they did not belong to Il
Semitic or Jewish race, Said ". n
Professor Huxley; Il am
that there are any living "n
resemble them, except
tribes of central lndiafi INC "po'e
to think that the Inf nog,osi az but !
and tba Egvnti,ns toWyjalon, Sea Of
N7' Sal lee, Nazs,t
bers of a race of ! Also Port Gw
antiquity. distinct txVeSi SLI w
and Turanian ON tRki, etJ
from negro and negF Ssp.sN -
IN "oru' nopouy --iltost-r%-
degree of assurank- IS - ss...----------....
men the builders --'----+------
were.-New York
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30
PRACTICAL HEALTH HINT.
Earache.


Hot applicable such as hot
water bottle or flannel cloths
) wrung out of hot water and ap-
piled to the ear, will often give
; instant relief, especially If the
pain Is caused by neuralgia in
the face or head, II you do not
have hot water bottle dannel
sack filed with hops can be
used. Nuke small sack of flan-
mel, fill it with hops and dip the
J bag into very hot water, wiring
it out as dry as possible and APP
ply it to the ear.
This affords a very good form
OF moist heat, and If a dry fan.
mel cloth is placed over the head.
covering the bag of hops, this
will hold the steam and make
one of the best ways there are
of steaming the ear. or course
as the hops become cold they
can be dipped in the hot water
again. Another method Is to
s heat salt-just common table
> salt-until it is quite hot. put 1t
5 In flannel bag and apply to the
ear.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1913-12-30

The Chem mical Detective.

Great Is the chemist A glue fac.
tory, which was proud of the sticking
qualities of its glue. received many
complaints that its glue was not stick.
Ing, and the manager believed 1t was
not his product that was at fault. but
glue made by some other concern and
falsely represented to be his.
The chemist was asked to find rem
edy. He made slight change in the
process of manufacture. so that when
a certain chemical was applied to the
glue any time after it had left the
factory the glue would Immediately
change to certain color. Statesmen
were then given bottles of this chem
ical. Whenever they were told that
their glue had failed they asked to see
the faulty work and then dropped some
of the chemical on the dry glue. If
the proper color appeared 1t was their
glue, otherwise 1t was a competitors.
If the customer doubted the test the
salesman could prove the fairness of
1t by trying it on any OF his firms
glue. This stopped the complaints
Saturday Evening Post.
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16

oughly satisfied Frenchman Id met. 1t
was good to listen TO him talking hard
and fast on this subject in French and
English; English because he considered it
courtesy to me, French because there were
some Thoughts too heartfelt for any other
language. 1t was inspiring TO watch the
glowing face. the sparkling eyes.
No wonder he is idolized by his country
men and women. lie insists upon their
respecting themselves and their art and
literature; he won't let them forget what
France was and. in his opiEion. is I
imagine he handles them like lot of way
ward children and that imprssses them.
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16

not believe these things. 1t is merely a
phase OF French civilization to-day that
the children of France think 1t amusing to
criticise their great Mother. II was thus
in Athens at certain period. No. truly.
1t is Jean Richepin who tells you. France
is still the centre OF art and culture, as
1t has always been. It is Athens. and
London is Rome
Upon my word. mes enfants. It was re-
ffeshing TO hear this burst of national en-
thusiasm. and more than ever the strains
OF the "Marsellsise" rang in my ears.
This was the first optimistic and thor
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16
REWARDED FOR HER ASSENT.

1 agreed unhesitatingly. and that
pleased him. / could tell it by the de-
lightful smile he threw at me.
What form Of drama do you prefer-' I
asked then.
ANY form is good when the drama is
good, but I think I care most for the
classic. Shakespeare and Racine, of
course, reverence. and you note that
put Shakespeare first. His wonderful
blending of comedy and tragedy never
fails to thrill me. Light and shadow, you
see, like the coat and its lining"
And he lifted a corner of his morning
coat to show me how close its lining
was to it
Being quite imbued with his patriotism,
I felt should like to see If he would
illuminate at all on the subject Of the
new President. because most Frenchmen
seem to be like the one who said haughti-
So I hastily changed the subject and
asked IL he was pleased that NJ. Poincare
had been elected.
He rose to the occasion; the President
exists for him all right.
II am delighted" he announced, as II
something unusually agreeable had come
bis way. ''He is my. confrere. you know.
as he, too. is an Academician. and he will
be a good President. for he Is q strong
and intelligent man."
Il shouldn't think the Academy would
like to have its members go In for states
manship. Isn't it a purely literary. ar
tistic and musical body?" asked in my
ignorance.
''oh. no. the Academy is composed Of
the elite OF many professions. We have
statesmen among us. Of course. and We
have even a general"
when are you GQing to admit women
~ membWsT
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16
WHIRL AWAY FOR A WHILE.

"Oh. I erapple with it, or, as I have
said. We all pack up and so on a voyage.
perhaps a short one, perhaps 4 long one
Then we are happier than ever when We
get back to Paris. You like Paris your
self. don't you?" he inquired anxiously.
1 could just imagine how my prestige
would have tottered IL l had not spoken at
once and enthusiastically in, praise of his
City of Dreams. But I did. and he was
kinder and more gracious than ever, II
that could be possible.
He came to the door with me himself.
and did so hope that the beautiful Nine.
Richepin of the portrait or one Of the
handsome pictured boys would appear.
but they didn't.
The house was as quiet and dim and
shadowy as a poets house should be. L
might have thought him alone in 1t. II it
had not been for the maid servant who
opened to me when I came.
I held out my hand to shake his. and.
with a courtly bow. he bent over and
kissed 1t in the Old World way. The Man
of Many Lives and many sides Is bit of
a courtier, too. 1t seems
I can't for the life of me lima gine any
man but q Frenchman kissing the hand
of a plain, little invader into his house
hold in the morning. but this know. that
when they do 1t It seems quite the proper
thing and the only courteous way Of say
Ing goodby.
"Au revoir." called out Monsieur Richie
pin, as I descended the little steps into the
tiny garden.
And he stood there looking after mo
with the sur shining on his grtzzled hair
and In his bright eyes.
Then the maid servant suddenly an
mysteriously appeared from another part
of the house and opened the Noahs Ark
gate with friendly Bon Jour. madame"
and I departed from the quiet. peaceful
villa Guibert.
1t was one Of those visits that leave
you with pleasant reflections Paris
seemed brighter and more homelike than
usual. I felt cheered and uplifted
I had had an hour with a man whose
life has been full and fruitful, whose
ideals have been retained and who goes
through the world with love OF work.
love of family and great love Of his
country, a reverence for her past and hope
Tor her future.
cspsnsnA 5e1A Nsxtxssk 1siSunA1 a
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16

After this little furry OF patriotism he
WAS heated and wiped his brow with q
goodly bandanna-that kind of Persian
silk hanky which is popular with the male
element in Paris.
well. IL London Is Rome and Athens Is
Paris" pursued Katie. feeling she. too.
had been told to go way back and sit
DOWN. like the other naughty children.
what is Berlin. and what Is good old
New York;
Up went the RichepIn shoulders and
eyebrows and the answer came in Eng
lish.
DON'T WAS IN NEW YORK EVER"
Berlin. I know not what It is. I was
there once. 1 was in London many times,
but 1 don't was in New York. ever"
This was the only serious slip he made
in his English. and your non-l.nsuisttc
relative wishes she could say as much for
her French She talks hard and fast too,
but she has shrewd suspicious that her
grammar is not above reproach. Still, all
France is too polite to correct any one,
though they may smile broadly behind
your back.
L should like to go to New York" the
Immortal informed me graciously. Il
would like TO see your high buildings and
visit all your theatres. i am told you
have beautiful theatres When J am In
London always so to several plays"
Have You seen the productions OF
Reinhardt and Barker and Craig?"
Monsieur placed a hand on each knee
and leaned a little forward.
Barker and Craig?" he repeated, as II
they were new kind of food
Yes. you know-Gordon Craig. who
has new ideas as to strange effects in
lighting and scenery. and. Barker, who
belongs TO the advanced dramatists.'"
He shook his head heavily.
NO, I do not know them at all. Nor
am very, familiar with the productions
of Reinhardt. though I have seen two Of
them"
And what was your opinion?"
II cannot say much in praise of them.
They would not please French people.
They are too garish. too German, for US"
That dismissed Reinhardt, all right.
TOO German is the finishing clause In
France.
We'll. when you study productions
elsewhere how do you think they COM
pare witt those in Paris?" I quer:ed.
'Ah! as to mise-en-scene they are often
much finer in other cities" he acknowl-
edged ungrudgingly. Then he hastened
TO throw another bouquet at La Belle
France as he added: But as to actors,
surely We have the finest in the world,
n'est-ce-pas, mademoiselle?"
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16
HIS FRIENDS THE BOOKS.

"Oh. I work most and best in Paris
have studio way up at the top of the
house, shut off from all noise and dis
traction. and there can write for hours
at time. unconscious of the outside
world. 1t is large. airy room, where
keep my special treasures. souvenirs of
my travels and books. 1 have-oh, SO
many books" and he stretched out his
arms TO give me some idea as to the ex-
tent of them. 'They cover all the walls
and they are everywhere else as well.
wish could show you that room. think
1t would interest you, rnademoiselle. but
Mt the moment 1t is undergoing some re-
pairs. Perhaps you may come again some
time. and We will show it to YOU"
And do you work at any stated time or
just when the spirit moves your
Well. really. seem to be working al
ways except when I am delivering my
lectures. You would say, 1 suppose. that
the spirit always moves me, and think
It does After all, l am most contented
at my desk in my world OF the past. or
the world of my BRAIN
"And then If suddenly the wanderlust
comes along and grips you. what do you
do?'
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16

Monsieur Rlchepin smiled broadly.
That is on the knees of the gods" hs
replied. For myself. I would have them
now: but have only one voice. I am a
feminist. ! believe in giving women votes
and admitting them to craftsmanship and
Office. However. We have made one step
toward showing an appreciation Of femi-
nine ability. We do decorate women
who, have accomplished things in various
fields Of work. About twelve women have
the Legion d'Honneur. Nine. Dieulafey
is one"
who wears mems clothes-er-trousers and
all" blurted out.
The Immortars mouth twitehed As he
said Yes. but that is not why she was
decorated. after all She is famous ex-
plorer. and 1t was when she was in Asia
Minor with her husband that she adopted
the male attire. and the government gave
her special permission to dress that way
afterward. She is a very remarkable
woman"
Il am sure she must be-" I remarked
politely. but if exploring leads to male
attire I think I'll sit on my own hearth
He threw his head back and laughed at
me and with me.
Then thought of the play and the
poems and the essays and the memoirs
that France is waiting for, and 1t didn't
seem fair to keep him from his desk any
longer.
DO you 60 all your literary work
here in Paris?" I asked "O- do you, like
most English writer's. seek the seclusion
OF the country when you want to accom-
plish a great deal?"
The Washington herald., 1913-02-16

mustache. His eyes are as clear as those
of a boy. but they are keen, and they
look az you and through you calmly and
thoroughly, not cruelty or critically. but
quite as if it were just in the days work.
He has a touch OF the dapperness OF
the true Partisan. His clothes were well
bujIt and fitted him well. yet you feel
he'd be lust as impressive in a bathrobe
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24

A Percheron Stallion, registered in
Percheron Society of America. Bay,
coming 4 years old; will make a ton
horse; with good action.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24

Attractive Ladd
A registered Shire stallion, No.
1117. Dark bay, II hands high and
weighs 1900 pounds. Has proven
himself a good breeder. Pedigree
can be seen at barn.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24

may Be disposed oi! II shall be ID.
duty 81 owners * sSsins tliat my B,
sick Of any fatal Adiseas e MI 0iye y
danger warning ~ placing j yellow
flags in. size at least 1Oxl2 inches q
all gates or other openings into BIZ
premises. Upon the failure of any
person to comply with the require
ments Of this section II shall be the
duty of any one having knowledge
of the same to report the facts to the
state veterinarian Or his deputy. whose
duty it shall be to at once investigate
the case and if he finds the law is be-
ing violated he shall at once arrest
the offender and prosecute the same
in any court having jurisdiction over
such misdemeanors.
To Reclaim Swamp Lands
Missouri is going about the work
of retaining her swamp lands in a
more practical and systematic manner
than ever before. The recent legis-
lature, with this end in view, created
a department of land reclamation and
authorized the appointment Of a com
whose knowledge and ex-
perience in this line Of work will be
guarantee of definite results. The
cost of the state for his salary will be
only 81, 600. 90 year. This sum is
ridiculously small compared with the
immense amount at stake. Not one
Missouri citizen in a thousand is
aware of the fact that within the bord-
ers of his state five million acres of
the finest land in the world is SUBJ
merged to a depth of only a few inch
IS or feet. The drainage of this
water into other channels will of
course. make these lands available for
and immensely increase
he productive resources of the state.
The interest of the average taxpayer,
wen though he live two hundred
niles from one of these drainage dis
riots, is apparent from the fact that
he state will eventually realize $4,000
n taxes for every dollar it now de-
,otes towards the work of reclamma-
ion. None of these lands will be |
worth less than 500 an acre when |
he water is removed. Thus five mil
ion acres would mean the addition of |
i've hundred million dollars to the |
wealth of Missouri. Should
his be assessed at only one-third of
Is value the income to the state un-
Ter present rates of taxation would
'e something like one-third Of a mil
ion every year, to say nothing of the
yielded in taxes for a county, |
chool, road and other enterprises Of
local nature. In the Little River
rainage district alone five million
ollars, raised by private contribution,
7ill be spent within the next three
ears. This is the biggest project of
s kind the world has ever known.
his is but the beginning of the work
,hich is to eventually convert every
ere of submerged land in this state
ito a garden spot beside which the
lmed Nile Valley will pale into in
gnificance.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24


- sucssss M ricrce's oden Mcdral D. nj N
covefy cuinf sfn.nachs, vaated bodes yveak
0hsinakc and lingering couEhs a BASED 0n
ecofnlkon Ut the fundamental ruth that SSoaden
Medical Npcoverys supplies Nntufe with body hudd-
6ssusrepaiinH understanding materials, "a CON
ccncenratcd form. VITA This help Mature
suppieS neceoy strength the stomach - dgest
food, build TIE BODY and thereby throw oG hhscrinG
obstinate coughs. Ths "Diacoyery r.-establshes the
digestive and in sound hecith, purihss
enches blood c7d nouiofcs the nerycS--ia
short establishes sonad vigorous health 24gfs
yOur denlcr Offers son,ethina ''iasf e aood"
Il - probably FC4, Egh7.-if pays betfer. f#
But You tninKiaa OF tho nor thc profit 20
there's NOTHING 'si11t good" for yoE. Say ~.
Plain English; Nj
iine Sp6ed 1908 700 utons newly revised
Edition. for q e
81 Address r. " Pierce Buffalo, N
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24
Buffalo Bill

buffalo Dill
Black jack with white points, Is 1-2
hands high, weight 100 pounds.
One Of the heaviest boned Jacks in
the county.
Black Bob
Coal black with white points, Is 10
hands, extra heavy bone, we'll built,
will weigh 1850.
The above stock will stand the
season of 1918 at my barns, 4 miles
west Of Pleasant Gap, at the follow
ing terms:
GUSTIL-$12.5O to insure living
colt. Attractive Ladd $40. Buffalo
Bill SO. Black Bob s., to insure a
living colt. A lien is retained on colts
from said stock for service money.
Money is due when mare produces
foal changes ownership or is remov-
ed from neighborhood. Care is taken
to prevent accidents but not respon-
sible should they occur. STABLES
CLOSED ON SUNDAY. -.--~e~.----'--.-~-
william A. Baker
(26-2) BUTLER, MO-, ri. z.
The Butler weekly times. (Butler, Mo.) 1881-1918, 1913-04-24

Carpet rags dyed with PUT
NAM FADELEss DYES will not
fade, and the colors are bright
and pretty.