The Washington herald., 1913-11-02
M ODERN FA R Y TALES
There Are Just as Many Fairies as Ever There Was

4 manage the Hazel Kirke Miraculous Com
edy Company and clean up 800 per
week.
you don't sayE'
Madam, a theatrical manager never
lies"' said the gentleman, with dignity.
But they have always lied to me!'
There's an error about 1t somewhere
from the receipts Of the first night tele-
/ graph what owe you"
: But it will be 81
Il 'T wish il was to be $E."
The landlady said no more at the time,
and she wished to read up the encyclo-
pedia under the head Of Theatrical Man.
ager." She found what she sought on
page AS, and it read:
They are sleek. slick lot and even
when threatened with the police they re-
tain their nerve in a surprising manner.
It is the artistic temperament that makes
them thus. They don't really mean to
beat boarding house, but simply forget
| to pay"
Armed with the above information. the
landlady sought the manager next morn
ing. She intended to tell him that she
must have security for the debt, and that
IL he jumped the house she would have
an officer jump after him. She would say
/ to his face:
"You have diamond scarfpin. Leave
1t with me-"
And he would reply:
''It is only one Of those 30-cent Broad
way diamonds, and 1 will not deceive q
| trusting woman"
Then she would say:
you have a seal ring there that must
be worth at least SO"
And he would answer:
TT is the paste ring that Hazel Kirke
y1rI,a oh h1,fe
boy"
Then she would call him a double-dyed
scoundrel and bid him begone from her
domicile and leave his trunk behind to re-
mind her that he was no statesman. All
this would have come to pass had she not
gone up to his room to find it emptyi
The bird had flown. and his trunk had
flown with him. While she was busy for
few minutes with a one-year corn cure
he had gone over the roofs and Joined his
cast.
Heaven help mer' walled the bilked
lady as she sat down on the stairs and
covered her face with her hands.
AS heaven didn't seem inclined to turn
collector of bad debts the lady sobbed
proper time and then walled out:
''Oh, IL this were only the days OF the
fairies"'
"And who says It isn't" asked a
The lady Of the breakfast food uncov-
cred her face to behold a little old
woman with a number twenty-eight bust
and a number oPe shoe beside her and
asked:
And who may you be?'
ct am Red Rose the fairy"
''But you can't sell me no real estate
on Staten Island
IT do not wish to. You have been
THn -iaffr 1F owe f,l,r fAr-
toward a brownstone hash-house."
ALAS, eighteen big iron dollars dis
appeared with him! The rest OF the
boarders must live on lemon drops the
rest Of the week. Are you here to tell
me that 1 ought to be sent to an idiot
asylum"
Far from it, good lady. I came to see
justice done"
But Leon Devere and his cast are
far away ere this"
Fear not, I shall find them"
And she did find them, and what hap
pened? The opening night of "Hazel
Kirke'' was spoiled by a cloud-burst.
The second night was knocked out by
a cyclone The third night found the
stage and Hazel under three feet of
water, and the fourth night everybody
in the town went to the prize hog show
and not a red was taken in at the
theater.
1t was a smash!
Leon Devere went to work as farm
ers hired man, and the cast had to take
Jobs as walters at a winter hotel.
Did the landlady get her SIS? She
did. Miss Red Rose so fixed things
that a gambler dropped a so bill in
front of the boarding house, and the
good woman went out and found II
and did not return the over-plus. Some
nights, when the wind howls like a
striken soul around the gables, and the
pattering raiR reminds her Of the tears
of orphans, the good woman sighs and
feels a bit sorry for the man that flew
her coop, but she at the same time real
izes that no first-class boarding house
with a high stoop in front can be run
month after month on celery soup
alone