Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1913-01-10
BILLY AND THE TWINS
BY ;. N. CROWN.

sumed that II meant something Hat
tering.
The twins looked alike and dressed
alike and sang alike and became SEN
timental each In the same way. Billy
didn't know which one he wanted
Half the time he didn't know which
was Ellen, and the rest of the time
he didn't know which was Mary.
: Where he escorted one. he escorted
the other. II was expensive. Billy
began to run into debt.
This won't do" he decided 'T1l
get a photograph OF each. Then I'll
go on by myself and decide which
one gets the prize.
The Misses Roy gave their photo
graphs willingly. Billy took them
home. He sat down with lead PEN
ell to mark them for identification.
This one is--H'ml Why didn't
let them autograph them? Which one
is this one? Blessed II know.
Well. Wen mark this No. and this
No. g."
Next day Billy started on his va
cation. He went to a quiet farm
house. The board was cheap. and the
quiet gave him plenty of time to de-
eide his fate. He scanned the pic
lures In the woodland. in the meadow,
In the fields, and In the orchard. FL
nally his troubled soul was stilled. No.
Is smile was Just bit smilier than
No. rs.
That's the one I'll marry" said
Billy Peters.
So he came home. He had decided
that he'd forthwith propose to No.
l.. Then his soul sickened. Which
was No. /?
However, Billy was equal to q little
thing like that He carried the pho
to Of No. with him to the Roy home.
The twins entertained him In the par
lor. Billy took the photo from his
pocket.
Whose little face is this?" he ask
ed. Mary Roy studied the likeness
why, that's Ellen"
Ellen studied it. ct is not It's
| you, Mary"
Billy Peters went home with .
headache.
It took Billy two days to straighten
out this tangle. This time he had .
real idea He put two slips Of paper
into hat. One was marked Ellen and
the other was marked Mary. He
closed his eyes and drew out Ellen.
That night Billy called again. One
OF the twins was In the parlor.
Ellen" he began, TREMENDOUSLY.
I'm Mary" she smiled.
Billy swallowed hard. Well. what
difference did II make?
Mary" he asked, win you be my
wife?"
She shook her head. 'T'm sorry.
Billy. like you. But won't marry
until Ellen marries."
The other twin entered the parlor-
Billy manipulated his fountain pen and
then shook hands with Ellen. He
seemed quite sorry that he had mixed
her hand. But he had her marked.
That was the main thing.
Half an hour later one OF the twins
left the room. The one tat remained
had ink or one hand. Billy FASTENED
to her side.
Ellen" he whispered. will you be
my wife?"
She shook her head. Tm sorry.
Billy. like you. But ! won't marry
until Mary marries."
Billy Peters staggered to the door.
What do You think am" he de-
manded. "a Mormon7"
But there was still fight LEFT In
this much harassed lover. Soon he
had another plan. He'd dip up nice
chap-lots OF nice chaps. He'd take
them to the Roy home. II one Of them
married Ellen he'd take Mary, and IL
.one married Mary. he'd march on with
Ellen.
He brought nine young men to their
home. Then the twins woke up and
told him to stop.
I'm marry nobody but you" said
Ellen.
"And I'll marry nobody but you"
said Mary.
But I won't marry you unless you
marry Mary"
/ "And | won't marry you unless you
marry Ellen"
And ! won't marry until Mary mar
ries.s
And won't marry until Ellen mar
RES"
There was wild light in Billy Pc
ter's eyes He thanked them for
the great honor they had thrust
upon him and made his way to the
street
Six hours later a man stealthily ap-
preached q policeman. who was mind
ing his OWE business. as police
men do.
SSH" he said. Look"
The policeman looked. Railroad
ticket. isn't TT"
You've guessed f. Good guessers-
you cops I'm going west This town
Is no place for twins"
The policeman got q good grip
on his nightstick- so you're q twin.
eh7"
That's ne. I'm q scrumptious twin.
won't marry you unless you marry
me. and II you marry me won't mar
~ you. and"
The poIiceman's club came into
play.
Run along" he said. Il don't
allow any scrumptious twins on my
beat"
Don't blame you. oficer; don't
blame You. won't get married until
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