The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1913-04-10
FROM GOOD TO BAD
But His Crouch" Was Cured
When He Fell Into Wild
oW'S Well.
BY CLARA INEz DEACON.

more did not marry until he was thirty
years old. For years he haG been
known as one of the best natured and
open-handed citizens OF the place. He
continued to be SO known for several
years after marriage, and then folks
began asking each other what allied
James Baker.
Mr.. Baker began to shirk his debts.
He grew sulky and sullen. He seldom
laughed or smiled. He seemed to be
carrying a crouch around with him
from week TO week. His wife finally
left him and got divorce and then
James became meaner than ever.
There were many theories and argu-
ments as to the change from good to
bad Drink hadn't brought it about.
1t wasn't loss of property. He and his
wife were not compatible nor compan-
ionable, as was generally known, but
that fact should not have soured him
on the whole world
Then travelling quack doctor came
along and solved the mystery. He
didn't have to ask Baker any ques-
tions nor look at his tongue nor feel
his pulse He just asked him to buy
box of his ambitious, anticatarrh.
anti-consumption and anti-forty other
things, and when told to go to the hot
place he let the cat out of the bag.
What allied James Baker, and what
had allied him for years, was the fact
that he was a mummerette. The name
should not be tangled up with suf-
fragette. A suffragette, the learned
doctor explained, was female that
longed to poll vote and butt In. A
mummerette was small insect In
digenous to Persia and Egypt They
were rare these days, but in the long
ago when they wrapped their dead in
ten-cent shifting and allspice the mum
merette was joyously winging his way
from branch to branch. Now and
then he fell into the soup and was
wrapped up and buried with the dead.
When a museum mummy who had
had on Sunday buds for matter of
five thousand years came to have them
peeled off her, out jumped the mum
merette and began to take up life
again and be joyous.
James Baker had swallowed flying
mummerette, and that was what had
brought the change. The insect was
gnawing away at his vitals. Every time
he took bite the victim wanted to do
something mean. The antipills would
cure him In a month by killing off the
insect, but as the man wouldn't have
them let him go on being mean and
end on the gallows
Two or three days after the doctor
had explained things and moved on.
Mr.. Baker started in to fell a tree
near the highway. 1t was on his own
land, of course, but as the hummer
cite was biting rather hard that day
the man didn't care which way the
tree fell or what damage 1t did. The
tree fell across the road just as the
Widow Armstrong; COW came saun-
tering along to see what was up and
was made pulp Of.
That COW was valued at s35 and Mr.
Baker had been criminally careless
He wouldn't pay red cent, however.
and when the widow sued she was
beaten on some technicality. She was
a poor woman and she and her daugh-
ter had to do dressmaking. The
daughter was In love with and en-
gagged to marry young farmer named
Stevens. Stevens was cousin to Ba-
ker.
Not content whit killing her COW,
Baker set out to make things uncom-
Portable for the widow. BY means of
false tales he got up quarrel between
the lovers, and was thinking up other
mean things when Nemesis took run
ming jump and landed on his back. Be-
ing at work near the widows house
one day, and thinking he had seen
fence to get drink of water at her
well. AS he started to pump, the plat
form gave way, and down tumbled the
man of the mummerette. When he
brought up he was Is feet below the
surface and in cold water up to his
waist.
Mr. Baker was mistaken In thinking
he had seen both women go out. The
daughter had gone alone while the
mother had lain down to take a nap.
The crash at the well aroused her and
she hurried out to peer down and
ask:
is anybody down there?"
Eyes. ami" was answered.
Its Mr. Baker, isn't it?'
Eyes. Your blamed old well is
man-trapl I'm half killed and shall
sue you for heavy damages"
'I'm so sorry you fell in"
THAT don't do me no good. How am
I to get out?"
We'll think Of way by and by.
Waittil ! get chair. want to have
talk with you"
But don't want chair"
The widow fetched out and seated
herself as near the well as was safe
and began;
Now, Mr.. Baker you know you kill
ed my cow"
THE law cleared me-" he replied.
but everybody says ought to be
paid Have you no fairness about
your"
mot a burned bit! Let cow-own-
ers take care Ct their cows Why don't
you go down to the square and get
men end a roper"
I'm go, but my charge will be fifty
dollars!"