davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
Guidebook to Gallantry
By VIC
By Alma Woodward.

interesting II he doesn't talk So SHE'S
settled. Now for arranging the two
other FAIR ones. You must sit between
them. Not only that you may equally
distribute your sunshiny personality but
also Tor the sake Of their comfort. They
VIII nnd support, the one In the right
corner, the other In the left; while you.
sandwfched between, will md comfort
nowhere,
You will be bounced, bumped. bruised
and busted before you get home, (this
iast In a monetary sense.)
iou VIII, also, in this geographical po-
sltion be unable to see ANY of the
lady on your left beseeches you to ad-
mire an exquisite bit her eye has fallen
on, the lady on your right grabs your
arm wildly and entreats you not to miss
that ravishing effectv'
Have at your tongues tip a store of
snort, new forms Of apology. Because
when the car swerves suddenly to the
right, you. having no anchorage, will be
precipitated toward and against the
lady on the right-and vice versa "Ex-
cuse me, I'm sure," and Il BEG your
PARDON" will have to be rung in once in
a while, Of course
L forgot to warn you, in the begin
ming, to draw all your savings from the
bank before You start For understand.
all the extras" such as luncheon, stray
drinks, automobile wells, etc., that are
acquired en- route are paid for by YOU.
Why not. Isn't the owner giving YOU
the time Of your life taking you out in
his CAR? The least you can do GER
tainly, is to defray TRIVIAL. expenses.
even though they may exceed the cost
Of the machine in these days of the
rampant roadhouse.
Anyway, you'll have to pay, whether
you want to or not, because every auto
mobile owner has the head waiter Of
every roadhouse fixed TO call him out
to the machine on some pretext or other
just before it's time for the bill to be
served-leaving the goat chats you.
remember) the only Richmond in the
field,
To make yourself extremely popular
with owners of cars vaiunteer always 90
buy the ladies of the party souvenirs of
interesting places you pass through. IL
you do this Systematically You MAY be
sure of a trip every weekend and also
of meeting ALL the ladies that that
particular owner has on his visiting list
He's safe. because he knows you're
helpless as a magnet without HIS CAR
a gallon for gasolene and that ten gal
Ions will more than do the trip. while
the luncheon check alone was slS.N
What's the use of spelling the joy OF
the occasion with bitter thoughtss
Ana if when you're turning home
ward in the light of the moon. you find
1t possible to hold BOTH rosy palms
without letting the lady on the right
know what your left hand doeth-and
vice versa-youll be voted perfect
dear and duck of a man"-and
there isn't an automobile owner i'm the
city who won't fight for your services
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
A Wise GrandChiId.

-HE power to see quickly and 10
seize every opportunity and adj
vantage, large and small alike.
is the quality that above all
others insures success.
Mr. Carnegie tells about little Scotch
boy who had the quality of astuteness
highly developed. The boy 5 grand
mother was packing lunch for him to
take to school one morning. Suddenly
looking up in the old lady's face he
said: Grandmother, does yer specs
magnify?"
A little. my child" she answered.
'Aweei, them" said the boy. Il wad
lust like il if ye wad take them of
when paCkin' my lunch. London Tele-
graph.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
ENERGY.

John H. Patterson is the president of the Ma
tonal Cash Register Company of Dayton Ohio. He
is under sentence for criminal violation of the Sher
man act; and but a short time ago his conviction
was very widely applauded
But, whatever some of his methods may have
been, It took brains, energy initiative to build up
great industry like that of his company. John H.
Patterson had them, and did it. He is by virtue of
those talents the foremost business man in Dayton.
II is perhaps not wholly coincidence that in
this hour of her extremity John H. Patterson should
be found the man who is directing the stupendous
relief work
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
MR.. WILSON IN CHARGE.

This is a progressive age. Less than FIVE years
ago very considerable political part of this Country
Republican no less than Democratic, was in an
uproar over what dissenters from new ways de-
nounced as Executive usurpaton.
The particular Executive arraigned by the dis
senters was Theodore Roosevelt He was habitually
and violently denounced for not being content to be
President of the United States but attempting to be
the House of Representatives, the United States
Senate and even the Supreme Court.
The Supreme Court was included in the indict-
ment drawn against him because he was charged
with deliberately packing that tribunal to get such
decisions as he desired and, when he took exception
to any opinion handed down by that Court he was
accused of trying to browbeat bullyrag and terror
ize the Justices.
That was FIVE years ago, we say, and tile man
was Theodore Roosevelt. There were some people
then that thought it was good thing for Chief
Magistrate to try to get Congress to do some of the
things that had been promised to the people. Some
people that didn't think it bad thing for some
body to stand up and object to things from The courts
that tine people never had expected to have when
they made their Constitution and their laws, and tat
they never would have permitted to happen If sumo
of the powers which naturally and inherently belong
to the people had not been gradually smugged away
from them
There were some people who felt tnat way them
but only some, and they got called irresponsible
mobs and reckless revolutionsts for feeling they
did and saying what they said about such things and
about Theodore Roosevelt.
But now, in the year 1913, with another man,
Democrat, in the White House, nobody at all seems
to get excited over the so-called one-man power Of
government. After he was elected Mr.. Wilson told
the people what he was going to do. And he told
the people what Congress was going to do And
he told the people what the corporations we're going
to do. And he told the people what the public was
going to do. And this seemed perfectly all right to
And since his Inauguration he has been telling
the House of Representatives what it snail do. And
he has been telling the United States Senate what
it shall do. And this seems perfectly all right to
everybody.
Indeed everybody seems immensely pleased that
President Wilson should have taken the tariff ques-
hon, the money question, the equal suffrage ques-
ton-the whole United States Government into mis-
hands as leader and arbiter both. This is very
good way to get things done; and perhaps that is the
reason there seems to be no worry at all now by
hose who five years ago were all but hystercal
over such individual mastery of the Government.
But, in any event, there seems to be large proof
n the present course of affairs that this is, as we
laid before, progressive though perhaps not al
ways a consistent, age. |
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
RAILROAD WAGE ADVANCES.

How complicated is the mixed question of wages
and the cost of living, and what different elements
bear upon an entirely fair settlement of wage dis
rutes perfectly illustrated in the arbitration pro-
ceedings between the fremen and the railroads.
The main argument advanced by the fremen in
support of their original demands for an increased
wage that their pay had not risen sufficiently to
keep on terms with the rise of general prices
1t shown Tuesday by competent witnesses
that many fremen were receiving 42.57 per
cent more wages than in 1902. There was testimony
in the case of one railroad to the effect that while
fremen are getting very considerably more pay than
they were ten years ago they are not working
so hard for it.
Now most workers in this country will have two
thoughts that particular subj ject One will be that
aside from the question of less work. AIS per
cent increase of pay in ten years would fairly we'll
probably much than, take of the average
persons or familys increased cost of living The
other will be that tine average worker in more or
less fixed situation would consider himself very
fortunate to have had his income increased A. per
cent in the last ten years, perhaps even IS per
cent
In respect to those points, therefore, the railroads
would appear to have scored palpable hit with
their submitted proof of very sharply advanced
wage-earners complaining.
But at the same hearing those witnesses, showing
increases made in the wages, also admitted that
along with the wage advance the efficiency of the
man receiving ii had developed. 1t is not made
clear to US in the news reports of those particular
proceedings whether this efficiency of the individual
is due to his better efforts and higher skill or
to the improved mechanical aid and facility given
to his labor But, whatever the cause, there was
the conceded fact of greater tonnage hauled now,
wage-earner for wage-earner, than in 1902.
Aside from the question of the increased cost Of
living of shorter hours of labor day. it has al
ways been prime principle of enlightened produc-
tive operations that the greater the output by the
individual the greater the share of that creation of
wealth to which he is entitled in justice and which,
failing the voluntary justice, he will insist upon
having.
So, in respect of this matter, the fremen also
srpear to have scored palpable hit And it is in
such things the weighing Of all that there is to be
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
AMBASSADOR WILSON'S EMlssARIEs.

II would be difficult to imagine more thankless
task than that which has been assumed by the little
delegation from Mexico City, which has come here to
explain just why Henry Lane Wilson is an ideal
bassador and why he ought politics no politics. to
be retained at his present post.
These sanguine emissaries plainly are in the way
of accumulating a vast amount of information about
how the American people feel about Mr.. Ambassador
Wilson, and how the vigorous gentlemen at the White
House and the State Department feel about him.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
THAT
, TO AN AUCTIONEER-

TO AN AUCHONEER.
Singer of the repartee,
Wielder of the gapel,
He who'd put it oper thee
Surely has to travel.
What the secret of your SPELL
Whether due to luck or
Science-Ppe no nay to tell;
I was just a sucker.
!, who wasn't there to buy
I, without a sorrow-
Well, you caught me NTH your eye
Funeral tomorrow).
You had not, you said, in years,
Seen such rotten bidding;
Whereupon you shed some tears
(AH of which mas kidding).
Now ! know your goings-on
We're but strategetic;
But you looked so woebegone
/ felt sympathetic.
1t mas "Charon on the Styx''-
Done, you said, in heaven;
When the bidding Jagged at six,
l put in a "Sepen."
That distinguished masterpiece
Sold at such fgger9
"Sacrlege" you cried. "Policew
"Someone make it bigger"
o the sympathetic flame
Then and there ignited!
Said you: "Why, the very frame"-
"TENP / cried, excited.
That mas all that it would bring;
! it mas who bought it.
J., who didn't want the thing;
!, who still have got it.
In the future, sir, Beware!
I've a nay to queer you!
I've a nay to get me square:
NEVERMORE COME NEAR
YOU!
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
OVERCOMING DISASTER.

Two branches of the Government, those of the
military and health have assumed charge of the des-
perae situation in the flooded district of the Middle
West Out of the terrible conditions there these two
great forces will bring order and eliminate the dan
ger of pestilence added to calamity. The emerg-
encies of disaster to prove the marvellous ef-
fciency of our governmental departments under
sudden demand, and when to that efficiency is added
the generosity of the public heart and purse even the
most widespread misfortune is successfully over
come
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
It Pays.

T the urgent request of the ad-
~ vertising department we reprint
- this hit of logic from an un-
known source.
When a duck lays an egg she just
waddlcs off as II nothing had happened
When a hen lays an egg there's a
whale OF a noise.
The hen advertises. Hence the de-
mand for hens eggs instead OF ducks
egSs."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
A Little Too Hot.

.HEN come TO tell ycZ. Mrs Ma
lone. that Yer husba nd met with
an accident"
An what is it, now walled
Mrs. Malone
He was overcome by the heat. mum.
Overcome by the heat, was her An
how did il happen?'
He fell into the furnace over at the
foundry, mum. m."-Tit-B Bits.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
Now They Don't Speak.

a II ACD-So Jack compared me
M with something sweet. did he?
The dear fellow, What was IL?
Marie-I don't think | should
tell you.
Maud-Oh. do. ! insist,
Marie-Well. he referred to YOU as
the human marshmallow. You GER
tainly had laid the powder on thick,
dear.-Boston Transcript.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
What s on the Program, IN
Washington Today

The following Masonic organizations
will meet tonight: I.odges-St- Johns.
No. II. +. A.: Hope, No. " L. \.
Royal Arch Chapter-Eureka. No. I.
r. A knights Templar-Columbia
Commandery. No. =. drill. Eastern
Star Chapters-Takoma. No l.: Ca
thedTal. No. Il; Friendship. No. II.
The following |. q. o. +. organizations
will meet tonight: Lodges-Central.
No. !. grand visitation; Metropolis,
No. 10. degree work. Phoenix, No. y.
business. Rebekah Degree-Dorcas
Lodge. No. T. degree work.
The following h. of z. organiza tions
will meet tonight: Lodges-Syra-
cusians. No. 10; Rathbone-Superior,
No -. lecture.
The following Red Mems organizations
will meet tonight: Seneca Tribe No
IL: Mineola Tribe. No. IA; Idaho Coun-
Gil. No. l.
The following National Union councils
will meet tonight: East Washington
and Mckinley.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

counted for each side-that there is the very best
justification of an intelligent arbitration of any dis
pute to give fair balancing of that account to every
single interest," employer, employe, and public, that
NAV be involved.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
Anyone Could Write a Head for This.

from the Post. -
To expedite the Government inVesti-
cation, Surg. Gen. Blue Yesterday an
nounced the appointment of Sur
geon p. II. Lavinder. of the Public
Health Service. as member OF the
commission Of investigation.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
The Difference.

Tanksyifng Day. exclaimed he visitor from
Germany. "Vot haf Americans to be for?'
haven't Kaiser to rule That =
something it," replied his American host.
Kaiser. iss true retortei Teuton
put you hafd trusts dots chust same"
same" said the American. can call
the trusts without being sent to jail for t"-Ex.
change. ..
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

In The Sun Dodgers" says the
Times" everyone goes to bed when
the sun sets and gets up when il rises "
Which is some feat of lodging.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
Perish the Thought!

G. s. X: Sag einmal: Do you call il
The Caws because of the Growing?
C. c. SENIOR
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
What makes the auction
eer's business 50 profitable is
the belief that it costs only
hve cents to raise the other
mans bid a nickel.

No, 1t isn't ours. Nor do we know
the author. He knows; he knows"
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

Then. too, there is the Bach, q
Cubist school of music
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

Also the fans who 20 to exhibition
games.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
AmuSements.

AmuSementS-
National-Mrs Fiske In The High
Road" Sis p. IN.
Columbia-"The Love Leash" Sis D. m.
Belasco-"The Typhoon.' S:l5 p. m
Poli's-Poli Players in The College
Widow" 2:l5 and S:l5 o. m.
Chase's-Polite vaudeville. 2:l5 and Sis
p. m.
Academy-"The White slave" SIS p. m.
Casino-N audeville.
Cesmos-Naudeville.
Lyceum-"The Girls From Missouri"
s:I5 and Sis p. m
Gayety-Trocadero buriesquers. 2:is and
Sis .. m.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

PERSONAL AND PRIVATE.
Marc: on. pshaw'
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

10 LOUISVILLE 10 ltStIIy III TIIoOII~
shining case before the Federal court,
and a reporter for a Louisville paper
interviewed him on conditions in the
mountains. says the Saturday Evening
Post.
Son" said the clansman seriously.
things is in mighty bad way up
in Clay count. It's honest fact
that a man can't have no peace up
thar onless he's furever shootin' SOME
hnl
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
A Constant Struggle.

~v, HEN the Observation-Disclosures
w rard feud ragged a few years
" ago in Clay county. KY.
partisan of one faction came
The Washington times., 1913-03-28
WHY SANATARIUMS CONTINUE TO
BE NECESSARY.
'From the Herald. -

From the 'Herald."p
NEW YORK, March 27.-FTank J.
Gould virtually renounced his citizenship
in this country today when he sailed
for France, declaring that he was dis
gusted with the way the United States
Government interfcred with business.
Since he was fined sl,GD0 by Judge
Hough, of the United States Federal
Court. on an Indictment under the Sher-
man antitrust law in 1911. Mr.. Gould S
love for his mother country has been de-
cidedly on the wanc.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

They being the cube rooters.
G. s. X.
The Washington times., 1913-03-28

The Henry B. Harris estate is present
ing Shep Camp. no doubt but it's using
the photos Of Frank Mcintyre on its
posters.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1913-09-12
ANTITRUST LAWS
 ARE PLANNED President Lays Foundation for Enactment of "Seven
 Sisters" Laws STARTS AN INQUIRY Part of His Legislative Policy, Fol- lowing Passage of Tariff and
 Currency Acts.
STARTS AN INQUIRY

Washington Sept. n.-Anti-trust legislation along the lines of the "sev- en sisters" laws of New Jersey, was taken under consideration here today. This is President Wilson's personal plans for Democratic trust legislation and the third in the administration legislative policy, the tariff now being out of the way and currency reform well on the road to enactment.
 It is planned to hold series of conferences on the trust situation in the United States in the interim before the opening of the regular session of congress in December. At these con- ferences party leaders and Attorney General McReynolds will advise the president and whip the legislative pro- gram into shape.
 The president, it was said today, in- tends to reopen the entire trust ques- tion and to conduct complete investi- gation of past trust litigation against trusts by the government. With this end in view, the Department of Justice has ordered an investigation of the To- bacco Trust dissolution decree with the object of instituting contempt pro- ceedings if it is ascertained that the trust has not followed the letter and spirit of the law.
 It was announced that like investi- gation of the Standard Oil Company has been practically completed by the Department agents, and that the in quiry report would be taken under consideration by the Attorney General with a view to having this case ready for possible adjudication when tht courts convene this fall.
 The Department of Justice will re view also the numerous other dissolu tion decrees rendered.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1913-09-12

the convenience of a large orchestra and will be occupied by Prof Al Thurburn and orchestra, several of whom are soloists of considerable note. one of whom was for years with Sousas Band and one for several seasons with Al G. Fields Mnstrels.
 The auditorium is elegantly finish ed and it is estimated that the thea tre will cost approximately $12,000 when finished. The ceiling is one of the highest in the city, being 37 feet at the highest point. Every con- venience for the patrons has been , looked after and the Best Theatre is credit to the city of Pine Bluff.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1913-09-12
"WOLF VF WALL STREET''
 PLACED UNDER ARREST

Washington, Sept 11.-David La mar, the Wolf of Wall Street." was arrested here this afternoon at the order of the Department of Justice. and held under $3,000 bail until Sep- tember 17, for hearing to decide whether he can be extradited to New York for trial under the indictment pending there against him, charging him with the impersonation of Repre- congressman
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1913-09-12
ONE CENT AND COSTS
 IS THE JlTRY'S VERDICT

Munfordsville, Ky, Sept. 11.--One cent and costs was the fine fixed to- day by a jury here which heard the evidence in the case of Walter Gallo way, charged with involuntary man. slaughter for the killing of Bliss Rich ardson At former trial he was sentenced to from two to twenty-one years in the penitentiary, but his law yers succeeded in securing a new trial
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1913-09-12
MAYOR GAYNOR'S DEATH SUDDEN Expired at Sea After Being
 Found Unconscious in a Chair.
SON MADE DISCOVERY
Upsets New YOrk'S Political Arrange. ment.-Left New York Hur.
 riedly Last Week.

London, Sept. 11.-(By Wireless from International News Service Correspondent Aboard Steamship Baltic)-Mayor William J. Gaynor, of New York. died of heart failure on board the Baltic at 1:07 D. m. Wednesday,
 The end came unexpectedly and very quietly and peacefully with no signs of fight for life.
 When discovered by his son, Rufus, who had just come down from the boat deck to the promenade deck, where his father was seated, to ac- company him to lunch, the Mayor left foot was still on the footrest of his deck chair, and his hands rested easily on the chairs arms.
 Finding his father as he thought, asleep, young Ganor shook nm gently but soon realizing that he was unconscious, summoned the ship sur geon and the trained nurse accom- panving him. Artificial i-esprlat1on and hyDodermic injections were re- sorted to-. but it quickly became ap- parent that the Mayor was beyond human aid and the body was removed to inc Mayors state room, where 1t was embalmed under direction of the ships doctor and placed in sealed casket..
 At the commencement of the voy- age Mayor Gaynor looked rather worn and showed signs of slight nervous ness. He was shaken by frequent paroxysms of coughing, evidently caused by the bullet lodged in his throat when the would-be assassin, James Gallagher, shot him as he was standing on the deck of the Kaiser Wilhelm der Crosse at Hoboken on August 9, 1910.
 The body will be transferred to the ustiania tomorrow at Queenstown to be brought home.
 News Reaches New York
 NoW 1OIk, oCpl. IL. | hC AlS"s' oA the death of William J. Gaynor, mayor of New York City, on board the steamer Baltic, while at sea- yester- cay, was received a. the White Star Line offices here today, ill brief wireless message from Captain Ram som, the commander of the vessel.
 commander Ransom added that the body was being brought to Liverpool.
 Sailed From New York Sept f.
 Mayor Gaynor sailed away from New York q fast fail,lg man on the morn ing Of September i. An hour before he sailed but one man, his secretary, knew of his plans cutside of members Of hls immediate family. The mayors announced purpose was for brief va cation on the ocean. He felt that the tonic effect of the salt air would re- store him in some measure to health.
 The Baltic was due at Queenstown today. The mayor died as she was nearing the other side. The news of his death was sent by wireless to Crookhaven by Rufus w. Gaynor and