Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1912-12-27

"'And whatll yO' dOY
"'I'll so with yo'."
"WaaI. we started Off one day ann
got aboard Of the railroad kyars.
was u little narvOus, and the old wO'
man braced her feet and hung on with
her hands. but we got along without
any Gala nifty. In about an hour. when
she dared to open her eyes and draw
her breath. she says to me:
"'Zeb. how many houses have 70
seen since we left home!
"'MOre'n hundred says I.
"'And how many people"
"'MOre'n thousand
"'Shoo! Then we must hev got clear
ag'in!
when we got down to Nashville
thar was SO many people and so many
houses and such a movin' around that
| got the old woman behind me and
prepared to fight to the death, but not
critter laid hands on us. Some of
'em laughed at my cowhide boots. and
some of 'em grinned at the old wo.
mans poke bonnet. but everything was
good natured We went to tavern to
git board. and when the old woman
sees the carpets on the floors, the stuff
cheers standin' around and the lookin'
glasses as big as q tabl!clOth she turns
pale and puts her arms around me and
says:
| "'Zeb, ! kin see now why thar ar
SO many sinners In this world. II
critter kin hev all these things. he
don't keer a pesky drat about gwine
to heaven. I'm afeared we'll be bad
'nufr to steal hawgs in week.
AT the end of three days the legis.
lachur opened. and had to 20 up to
the statehouse. Lordy. stranger, but
I'd rather tackled three old bars at
once! | had goose flesh rs struck
that crowd. and the old woman wasn't
around to Encourage me. ! went into
the statehonse with the crowd, and
Id list found q seat when q Teller
comes around and says:
"'Excuse me, but amt that q rife
yo've got thar
"'She be- says l. It's rife which
has killed mo- bars and wildcats than
yo' could count In an hour. and she's
still ready fer the next varmint'
"'But yo' can't bring no deadly weep
in yere,' he goes on. This amt no
jumpin' match nor boss race. but the
legislachur OF Tennessee
II told him l knowed whar I was,
but that | should keep tight holt Of
that rifle till knowed l was out of
the woods, and he goes away gr0wlin
to hisself. Mebbe 1t was half an hour
arter that when a Teller stands up on
a platform and looks Mt me and says:
"'Does the honorable member from
Beaver Cove expect to find any barn
ON the flooh OF this houseY
~ amt sayin' as do answers,
but II thar Is a riot over moonshine
whisky | might want sunthin' better
than clubr
"Rimeby that same Teller stood up
agin and says. as slick as 20 please:
"'Mebbe the honorable member from.
Beaver Cove would like to be excused
for half an hour while he takes his
gun home
"'DO any critter yere want to pick q
fuss with Zeb Whittier says ! as
stands up.
Everybody laughs and claps his
bands, but no one comes nigh me. and
puts on my cap. shoulders my rifle
and sAys rs I walks ont:
."'It's an emery crowd, and thar amt
a man among yo' who kin pull a rab.
bit out Of boiler logv
IL went straight to the tavern, and
thar | found the old woman shiverin'
and shakin' fur her life.
whats the matterY says I.
They've put piller cases trimmed
with lace on our he'd says she. and
the gorgeOIsness Of II will bring on
heart disease. Zeb. fur the Lawds
sake. let's go back home!
"'Hnt I'm here 10 watch moonshine.'
says |.
Never mind nIO0nsline nur notbin'
else ON the face ct this nirth, but LET'S
be gittin'. This world ain't fur ia
Zeb. We IL like two lost children wan.
drrin' through the woods and exppctin'
to I've eat mp ANY mint. and I'm so
Skeart aud Illustrated that shant live
two days ."n2rr.. Z-b, If yo' love NE.
| come hul,t.,
| "'Iil Il" H.. SAYS /. And she cor ON
hrr poke. packed our carpetbag. and
we WIS orr ~ the town of Nashville
oe'" s"hd""n. never t" go back"