New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1912-09-29


Mr.. and Mrs Vinegar lived in vine-
gar bottle Now. one day. when MI
Vinegar was from home, Mrs. vinegar
who was very good housewife. was
busily sweeping her house. when an uh-
lucky thump of the broom brought the
whole house cltter-clatter. clitter-clatter
about her ears In floods of tears she
rushed forth 10 meet her huSoahd' vi
seeing him. she exclaimed:
"Oh. Mr. Vinegar! Mr.. Vinegar. we are
ruined, We are ruined. We are ruined.
I have knocked the house down, and II
is all TO pieces,'
Mr.. Vinegar then said: "NIy dear. let
us see what can be done. Here Is 'he
door: | will take II on my back, and VIC
will go forth TO seek our fortune
They walked all that day, and at night
fall entered thick forest. They were
both very tired, and Mr.. Vinegar said;
my love ! will climb up into tree
drag UP the door. and YOU shall follow.
This he did, and they both stretched
their weary limbs upon the door ana fell
fast asleep In the middle Of the nifht
Mr.. Vinegar was disturbed by the sound
Of voices beneath, and TO his great dis
may perceived that party o. thieves
were met to divide their booty.
"IIere Jack" said one. heres IS go
for YOU: here, Bill, here's 80 $500 for
you; here. Bob here's i3 $50 for You,
Mr. Vinegar could listen no longer; his
terror was so intense that he trcmbled
most violently and shook down the door
on their heads. Away scampered the
thieves. but Mr.. Vinegar dared not quit
his retreat till broad daylight
He then scrambled out of the tree and
went 10 lift up the door What did he be-
hold but a number Of golden suineas.
Come down, Mrs. Vinegar" he cried
Come down, / say: our fortunes made;
our fortunes made; come down. ! say.
Mrs. Vinegar got down as fast as she
could. and saw the money with equal de-
light.
Now. my dear" said she. I'm tell
YOU what you shall do. There IS fair
at tho town hard by. You shall take
these 10 guineas and buy a COW. I can
make butter and cheese, which YOU shall
sell at market, and we shall then be
able to live very comlorIaDly'
Mr.. Vinegar joyfully agrees, takes the
money and goes off to the fair. When he
arrived he walked up and down, and at
length saw beautiful red COW.
"Oh," thought Mr.. Vinegar, 'if I had
but that COW l should be the happiest man
alive" So he offers the 40 guineas for the
COW. and the owner. declaring that as he
WAS a friend, he'd oblige him, the bargain
WAS made. Proud of his purchase. he
drove the COW backward and forward 10
show il. By and bye, he saw man play
! ing the NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. tweedle-
dee: the children followed him about and
he appeared 10 be pocheting money on all
sides. Well" thought Mr.. Vinegar, IF
had but that beautiful instrument l should
be the happiest man alive-my fortune
would be made
So he went up TO the man.
Friend" says he, what beautiful IN
strunent that is, and what deal of
money you must make
why. yes" said the man. Il make
great deal Of money, 10 be sure, and 1t Is
wonderful instrument
"Oh." cried Mr. Vinegar "how ] should
like 10 possess it,
well" said the man, "as you arc
friend, don't much mind parting with
IL; YOU shall have it for that red cow
: Done" said the delighted Mr.. Vinegar;
so the beautiful red COW was given for
the bagpipcs.
| lie walked up and down with his pur-
! cha &C. but in vair he attempted To play
/ time. and instead Of pocketng pence
the boys followed him, hootlng, laughing
and pelting.
| Poor Mr.. Vinegar, His fingers grew
very cold. and, heartily ashamed and
mortified, he was leaving the town when
he met a man with fine, thick pair of
1 gloves.
"Oh. my fingers arc so very cold said
Mr.. Vinegar 90 himself, 'if ! had but
those beautiful gloves | should be the
! happiest man alive
lie went up to the man and said To
him:
Friend, you seem to have q cap, al
par Of gloves there
Yes. truly" cried the man. and my
hands are as warm as possible this cold
| November day"
Well" said Mr. Vinegar. Il should
/ like to have them.
What will you sive?' said the man.
AS You IRE a friend don't much mind
! letting you have them for those bag
| pipes"
Done" cried Mr.. Vinegar. He put on
the gloves. and felt perfectly happy as
J he trudged homcwards.
| At last he grew very tired. when he
! saw man coming toward him with a
| good stout stick in his hand. oh said
| MIR. Vinegar. If | had but that stick |
should then be the happiest man aiive!'
| lie accosted the man.
"Irriend. what u rare good stick you
have got"
Yes" said the man, ! have used it
| for many long mile and good friend
| IT has been, but If you have fancy for
| IT, as you arc "A friend, | don't mind Civ
! ing it 10 Sou FOR that pair Of gloves