The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1912-09-04
MA PUT INDIAN
SIGN ON CUPID
By LAURA TURNER.

BY LAURA TURNER.
"My ma surely did put the skids I'M
der that Heinz fellow last Sunday
night" laughed the girl with the exag-
geratei psyche knot. HE won't come
incoming around my sister Bertha any
more. She giggled as she tucked in
few stray hairs that had cLried over
her collar and Surveyed her pleasing
reflection in the mirror above the lava
tory.
'iiow did she sQuelch him. Annie?"
asked the sleepy looking blonde.
stretching her wet handkerchief across
the mirror to dry 1t.
"Well. Bcrtha's had an awful case
on llenzy for quite while. He's a
widower. with a boy about five years
old. but Bertha said she didn't care.
for She liked him anyway. She used
to rave about him until she made
ma and me tired. cold see from
the start thai ma didnt have much
use for him. and she armed bertha
that all he was looking Tor was some.
body to keep house and cook his meals
for him and take care OF that kid OF
his.
Bertha said ma was wrong. that
lo was head over ears in love with
her, and she wouldn't hear a word
against him. Ma used to call him
l,ertha's tiresidc companion. because
he never took her anywhere, but just
sat around and acted as though he
was afraid to spend nickel.
Last Sunday morning Bertha went
out 10 tie kitchen and asked ma if she
would let her have the Heinz fellow to
supper that evening She cOaXed
around until ma finally said she could
ask him if she wanted to, but you
could see that ma wasn't at all crazy
about having him come.
"After Bertha had gone out and ma
and were doing up the work, all Of
4 sudden | saw that ma had an idea.
She chuckled to herself the rest Of
the morning, but she wouldn't let me
in on the joke When | asked her
about il she just told ME | would have
to Mail and keep my eyes open and |
would see something funny.
THAT evening Bertha said she want
cd TO get supper all by herself and
show llcnzy what a grand cook she
was. Ma says An right. if you want
TO get a job rs housckecpcr of course
you must give your future boss SAM
pie of your cooking With that she
went upstairs.
After a while ma came down again
and asked bertha how she was get
ting along Bertha said that everything
was on the stove ready to dish up, and
would ma watch things lille she hus-
tied upstairs in order to primp up a
bit?
Ma said she would, so Bertha beat
II upstairs to doll up for Heinzy.
when we all filed up to the dining
room and sat down things looked good
Ia me. While ma was bringing in the
dishes she says to IIcinzy: I want
you to know, Mr.. Heinz, that Bertha
cooked every bit of tho supper tonight.
SO if you like it you'll have TO give
her all the credit for it,
lIcinzy looked over at Bertha with
"A fat. cOntcntcd smile and tucked Il
napkin under his double chin. Then
he took bite of biscuit and next |
saw him look all around to see If any.
body was watching him as he rolled II
out of his mouth into his hand and
laid 1t carefully on his plate. I began
to get suspicious, so took a bite oil
biscuit just to see. Say, It was about
tho awfuleSt tasting thing ever ate!
1T was positively green inside!
Bertha had used soda instead of bak
ing powder, and plenty Of 1t, too. and
the biscuits were simply terrible!
Il copied IIcinzy and got rid Of my
bite quick as could and took q swal
low Of coffee to get the taste out OF
M mouth. Say! The coffee was SO
weak it was just like water! look
ed over at ma and her face was as red
rs beet, she was trying so hard Ia
keep from laughing
i knew pretty well then who had
qnccrcd the supper. Ma must have
put soda in the baking powder can 81
bertha would be sure to get 1t. ant
probably she put plenty of hot watel
IN the coffee pot after Bertha hat
gone upstairs.
i was curious to know what els,
ma had done, SO helped myself to
chop Salty. Il was worse than ;
Inackerel that hadn't been soaked
overnight! Why, I felt picked Il
brine after | swallowed it, Iglancet
over at IIeinzy. He was the glummes
locking somebody you ever saw!
/. Every now and then he looked at Der
TIA with frown banker than a
thunder cloud.