Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1912-08-13
DANGER OF HUMoR IN CONGRESS

wounds.
DANGER OF HUMoR IN CONGRESS
May Mean Death of Budding Young
Statesmen.
Oliver Wendell Holmes in his
verses, 1.-The Height of the Ridicu-
lous," says II never dare to write as
funny as I can," after the specimen
which he wrote had almost destroyed
his servant.
This, too, is a law Of public life
The first chapter in the primary OF
politics forbids any dalliance with the
gentle art of humor. The penalty OF
infraction is political oblivion, says
the Washington Star. Yet in every
session Of congress some member
tempts the public disfavor. For the
moment he is applauded, but the
laughter no sooner subsidies than
thumbs are turned down on his career.
This does not apply to the official
who can confound an opponent by a
keen retort or a clever bit Of repartee,
or the man who, while occasionally
witty, is able to win reputation Tor
serious craftsmanship.
Champ Clark, the speaker Of the
house Of representatives, possesses no
great reputation as a wit or humorist,
yet in many Of his speeches he uses
figures that are marked with the fra
GRANGE of the farm and the slang of
the street. For example, in heated
colloquy during the partisan strife OF
the last congress he accused the Re-
publicans Of indulging in too much
"hot air and slack jaw"
On another occasion he denounced
the lobbyists who visited the Capitol
during the tariff session in behalf OF
the various Industries interested In a
proposed bill. He declared that from
the morning Of the 10th day Of No
vember down to last Thursday night
lobbyists swarmed in Washington city
first a brigade, then division, then
a corps, then a full army. They were
as pestiferous, If not as numerous, as
the frogs and flies Of Egypt"
Then there Is Senator Rayner, OF
Maryland, who frequently rises in the
more august senate to express in crisp
language his views on life and Its Is
sues Senator Rayner recently de-
clared, with a vicious thump on his
desk:
There are two elements in society.
One is the element that has more ap-
petite than dinner, and the other the
element that has more dinner than
appetite"
A score Of years ago Private Jonn
Allen, Of Tupelo. was elected to con-
gress from Mississippi. Allen was
anxious to secure a fish hatchery for
his native town Of Tupelo. Unable to
persuade the committee on appropri-
ations Of the merit Of the proposition,
he introduced in the house an amend
ment to the sundry civil appropriation
bill carrying $4,000, and February
20, 1901, he rose on the floor to plead
for it's adoption. The town Of Tupelo
was the subject of this eulogy:
IF 1 were willing" he declared in
pat, ito avail myself Of the tradi-
tions and many we'll authenticated
historical suspicious, I might invest
this subject with much more romantic
interests. But I propose to confine
myself to the we'll authenticated
facts, ignoring such traditions as the
one to the effect that, when Chris
topher Columbus had his famous
interview with Ferdinand and 1sa-
bella of Spain, he assured them that
the All-wise Creator. creating a
world like this, was bound to have
made somewhere near its centre such
Ia place as Tupelo.
I'm 1913 the knightly Ponce de
Leon landed upon the coast Of Flori-
da, and perverted history has it that
he started out to look for the foun-
tain of youth and limitless gold fields,
when in truth and in fact he really
started to look for Tupelo.
MANY of you gentlemen have never
been to Tupelo. I hope none Of you
entertain any idea of dying without
going there. I extend you all an in
vitation to go with me to College
Hill and see one of our Tupelo sun
sets. Come and see one of our south
ern, silvery Tupelo moons. I think 1t
is the only place in the south where
we have the same beautiful moons
we had before the war.
II have often been asked about the
size of Tupelo. The tabulating ma
chimes of the last census have not
been able to work 1t out yet, but by
sufficiently extending the corporate
limits of our town we can accommo-
date a populace larger than the city
of London. The truth is that our lands
about Tupelo have been so valuable
for agricultural purposes that we
have not yet yielded them up for
building city as rapidly as we should
have done.
while there are larger places
than Tupelo. 1 do not think there is
any other place just like it. Tupelo is
very near, if not exactly, in the centre
of the world. The horizon seems
about the same distance in every di-
rection.
"Refore us js a proposition to es-