davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Almost Universal Trick Of City Sales.
men Makes No Sort Of Appeal
to Him.

"Of course 1T is generally under
stood that we car always run the 9th
err fellows business better than he
cam said the fussy Philadelphian.
which is all the more reason for sur
prise that our advice is so seldom re-
garded. l could tell the h~aberdasher.
for instance. what sort OF statesmen
be should have behind his counters
Il have never yet met one OF these
fellows who could resist the tempta-
ton to tell me what I should wear.
And that isn't the worst Of it They
tell me l should wear certain things
because they do. not realizing that
that is the very reason why I should
not wear them.
Il rather pride myself upon the
nicely Of my attire. and to have one
of these young whippersnappers say.
Here is the collier for you; / wear
those myself as though that would
influence me favorably, certainly does
get on my nerves. And they all do It.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

when he shook his head with Il kind
of snort. threw down his pen, and
got to his feet, facing me with a sickly
smile.
Il am going to ask you to excuse
me, my dear Lightnut"-came right
out frankly like that, you know, But
the fact is" he opened n shut his
watch-nervously, you know-"I have
just realized how"
But l stopped him-couldn't let him
go on, of course: .Oh, l say, you
know! Not another word, my dear
JUDGE don't care a jolly hang. dash
it, And to show him. | smiled, got
out a cigarette, and perched kind Of
s1dew1se on the edge OF the table.
I'm not a bit sensitive, don't you
know!"
He stared. Indeed, mol see you
are mott" he said warmly.
! drew a light a bit airily. "Of
course" puffed. what you are think
ing of is your servant, but Fl shot
him a light wink-'Pve got to think a
little about my own affair, don't
you
"Lfghtnutl" He caught me by the
arms, his face Redeemed almost black.
My dear boy. ten thousand %pardons!
I assur you-"
That's just all right, judge" | re-
assured him soothingly. All 1 am
holding out for is just to be sure we
understand each other about Fran
ces-that l may be sure | have your
authority"
$50 that's it," He relaxed with a
deep breath. Then quietly: My dear
boy, you make me ashamed OF N.Y.
self was rude!" And he shook my
hand. Eyes, indeed-you just go right
ahead; almost anything is preferable
to the vicious life Francis is leading
%anything!" He sighed and his voice
dropped co~nfidentially: I'm afraid
even you would be discouraged il 1
told you of one or two disgraceful cpl
sodes at Cambridge know Scoggins
would bel"
Scoggins again-always Scoggins!
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
His Own Bills.

Butchers are nc generally credited
with an especially sensitive tempera.
ment, but New York has one member
OF the guild whose skin must be ex.
traordinarily thin. At any rate, he
goes to unusual lengths to exonerate
himself from the charge Of extortion.
Above the cashiers window he has
hung this sign:
IT prices are high don't blame me.
They have hit me. too. Here is the
meat bill of my W family. Read
It" Then follows an itemized ac-
count Of the chops, steaks, roasts and
cats meat consumed by the butchers
dependents in one week The prices
recorded are sufficiently altitudinous
to appease the most disgruntled Gus
toners, and they settle their own bills
with good grace.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

ly hopeless!" and dash it. he Just
groaned,
But now, my dear young friend.'
he went on, and with q glance at the
Uttered table, Il want o to go out
and, get some fresh air before the
bloom of the morning is past-if you
go out this way, you Will avoid en-
countering those girls"-his hand gen
thy but firmly urged me. 1T has beer
just abominably selfish of me to have
kept you stuffed in here; l know |
have bored you to death with all this
talk about the family black sheep
feel that now l must let you escape"
ION, no-no at ALL" I protested
hastily and pulling back Never would
do to let him feel that way, o know!
Really, pom honor now, thing l want
to do is Just stay here and talk to you
about Frances"
"Oh, damn Fran-h'm-I mean
Francis will kept" He caught him
self hastily before the stare of my
glass, fumbIing with the papers to
cover his confusion. Then he clapped
me on the shoulder, pressing me again
toward the door. You just go ahead
and do whatever you car with Fran
els, yourself-you are my only hope!
Or wait, and III prepare the way for
you tonight-that's it; that's best!"-
and he went to nodding. Then he
halted my progress and eyed me in
tently. There's another thing"-his
voice ~dropped-"I think it's just as
well Jack shouldn't know OF your in
t~entions about Francis; he would
never approye-oh, never"
He pursed his lips to just a thin
curve as he shook his head positively.
His eyes bored at me ever his glass
es. / moistened my lips.
81 know he feels you have already
concerned yourself enough about
Francis" he said deliberately. The
other night at your rooms-er, you
know! Jack is so particular in those
little things. All, there's a model for
you'll"
He looked upward and wagged his
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

Richard Lightnut. an American with an
affected English accent, receives .s q, -e prs5t
proves to be q pair of pajarnas. 4 le,teI
hints of surprise to the ,wearer. LiGntnus
up for a smoke. His servant, Jenkins
comes in and. failing to recognize Light-
the s srsslnPss sra ao put Lis efm Hu. changes his
clothes intending to summon help. Wnen
he .reappears Jenkins falls on his mex
that he IS crazy. jenkins tells Lightnpt Of
the encounter he had with a hideous
@ @eesaHe FROM aae5 is friend 's R" Saek Rsf' RS:
Lightnut is asked to put up the kid
for the night on his way home t beant fSii
girl in black pajamas in his room; Light
nut is shocked by the girls drink,ng,
s her name ans IS F FlansY 'a and 1 puzzies him
with a story Of her love for her sister
ing the girl is missing and Lightnut hur-
ries to the boat to see, her OFF. he Is as
costed by a husky college boy. who cat.s
girl. Jack Billings calls to spend the
night with Lightnut They discover ef
priceless ,rubieS Ri h5dden d IN sh the pu pajamas
and retires. Lightnut later discovers
in his apartment a beefy person IL IN a mas-
Jenkins calls the police. who deciarG ~
intruder to be q. criminal. called u y
I 5snaP guest res i ana Appeals ais'i 70 the lat-
ter in vain. He is hustled off to 1ait,
In the morning Llghtnut IS aStoEisliSG
find Billings gone. and more astonlsHeu
when he gets a message from the iatteE;
demanding mis- clothes. Lightnut, pouna
for Tarrytown, Billings home. discovers
.Frances," the girl OF the pajamas., on
the train. Lightnut speaks to her ana az.
iudes to the night before. She declares
Indignantly tina Lightnut never saw her
in black pajamas. At TarrytoWn FRANCES
is met by a husky college youth. VINO
halls Lightnut as "Dicky." The latter ls-
nores the boy. who then threatens 70
thrash him for offending Frances. Light
nut takes the next train home. Biillngs
storms over the outrage OF his arrest. fie
and Lightnut discover mysterious mi
nese characters on the pajamas. Profes-
sor Doozenberry is called in to interpret
calls the lost silk of Si-Ling-Chi. The
writing declares that a person wearing
the pajamas will take on the seInplance
of the previous wearer. The professor
borrows the pajanas for EXPERIMENT:
.BiIlings'' dressed in paJamas Is Aouho IN
the professors room and is taken nome
in an automobile with Frances ana q Wo-
man Liehtnut calls 'the trump Light
Gus talk about "Francis." "Billings' IS
taken to his room. A servant tells Light
mt that a message has just been re-
ceived stating that Billings was unoeT ar
rest in New York for stealing a sun OF
black bahamas. Judge BILLINGS astohisLes
Lightnut with a tale of francls esca-
pades. Lightnut asks permission TO speak
- ssIT~a prpS -
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Appointed pav Of judgement.

A householder in an English town
had lent a horse to a solicitor, who
killed the animal through bad usage
Tie dealer insisted on payment, and
the lawyer, refusing cash. said he
would give a bill for the amount, but
it must be at a long date. The law.
yer drew a promissory note. making
1t payable on the day of Judgment.
An action was raised, and the lawyer
asked the sheriff to look at the bill.
Having done 80, the sheriff replied:
This is the day Of judgment, decree
you to pay tomorrow"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

Dash Scoggins! OF course he would
be discouraged. but l should not. Dev-
ilish simple reason, you Know
wouldn't believe it, by Jove!
Yes, l learned all about it from
my daughter when she came home,'
he proceeded gloomily: she feels that
in a it has marred Miss Kirk
lands visit with her"
Miss Kirkland! l recalled now that
that was the name of the girl from
China. BY Jove, 1 preferred o think
of her as the trump!
For Miss Kirkland heard the Cos
sip at Cambr!dge-seems she has
friends there among the residents;
and they were kind enough to tell
her of these things of h year before
as soon as they noticed 0 devoted
Francis was to her. At least this Is
what my daughter suspects-Miss
kirkland is not the kind to talk. you
know.
oh, wasn't shet BY Jove, l won
dered VIVA he would think If he had
heard our conversation in the hall!
Blu it wasn't for me to tell him he
was warming a what's-its-name to his
OOoOh, oO 4 just SP-Jr
Nevertheless" he shrugged, lit is
easy to see that she can't stand the
sight Of Francis" He shook his lead
dismally. Charming girl, Mr.. Light
nut-a rare and perfect type OF the
English beauty at her best"
Oh, was she! Not if 1 knew any
thing about it, and l had seen three
seasons in London. By Jove, | was
SO terribly shocked 1 could Just feel
it in my face!
He seemed surprised. Don't you
think so?" he insisted.
Well, I rather don't. o know!'
1t just blurted out Of itself. On. |
say-now, you're not really n earn
est?" And l screwed my glass so
hard in my embarrassment, l hurt my
,eye-"You know she's a freak Why,
dash it, l pulled up, for after all,
she was a fellow guest.
He stared, jammed his hands deep
in his pockets and ben toward me.
Now, look here. my boy, do o mean
to say you don't think Miss Kirkland
a beautiful and winning giri?"-1
guess he did see l meant 1t. for he
slowly emitted an expressive whistle
We'll. o are hopeless then-utter-
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Raw Chickens.

Rose Pastor Phelps Stokes, in an
address on behalf of a New York coun.
tryweek charity, told a quaint story.
"A little slum girl" she said, stood
for the first time in her life in a barn.
yard-a genuine, old-fashioned barn.
yard with its ricks, it's lazy COWS, its
plows and harrows, and what-not.
THE slum child drank it all in de-
lightedly, then gasped half to herself:
AN jest look at the chickens
all runnin' around ~raw!"-Washington
Star.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

- - -NS" 80
knew by his helmet.
He turned and l saw-O'Keefe!
"Oh. there you are, sir!" And with
a careless duck and a wave, he ambled
forward and placed in my hands a
parcel.
ITS them all right" he said, with
a fat wink. The black silk pajamas-
we got 'em, you see!"
"Jove!" calculated, staring. Then
suddenly l got the jolly idea full and
strong, you know, n l was just SO
dashed relieved n delighted. l shook
hands with him-fact!
oh, l say, Jenkins" | remarked.
twisting my glass at him, by Jove.
you know-eh?"
Certainly, sir!" jenkins admitted
calmly. Il knew in a minute socn as
he told mel"
And, by Jove, l believed him! Had
70, you know; it was only just one
instance OF the devilish clever, in
tuitive way Jenkins had OF boring in
to things!
Yes, sir,"-O'Keefe t%houghtfully
transferred a big wad to the other
SiSSN tho SrpldAli SdNS mo u tllIlS
lay off SOS l could bring EN- up
he studied with interest the top OF
n of the pillars of the po~rte-cochere
n shrugged lightly-"of course 1t
wasn't just because OF the reward.
though Of course five hundred bucks
is five hundred bucks, but we thought
you might like to have 'em-thank
you, sir!" Fol out of my folder /
peeled five crisp centuries and laid
them In his palm.
This done, Jenkins glanced at mo
and turned suggestively toward the
entrance. but O'Keefe didn't make a
move to go n no more did l. Fact
was, I had a devilish keen notion that
the old cat upstairs would be watch
ing for the policeman's departure
through the grounds, and it came to
me that to play him a little longer
wouldn't do In harm. but might seal
her jolly mouth the tighter.
OKeefe thanked me again. You're
sure solid with the force. sir" he as
sured, nodding earnestly. Just re
Captain Clutchem If any time in town
you get rounded up in any OF our lit
tle-er, you know!"-he dropped a
cheerful wink at me and glanced again
at the bills. Expect maybe you're
anxious to know if Tim gets a dizzy
outer this" he proceeded; and l mu-.
INJURED some jolly something. Or
course, l wasn't anxious, you know;
fact is, | didn't care a dash-didn't
even remember who Tim was. Yes.
stree, he'll get ten of this!" h fin
ished impressively.
Meantime, he had been launching
himself up until now he succeeded in
wrenching from somewhere behind. a
ragged and shiny old wallet, bulging
with worn and greasy papers. Within
this, with a flourish. he laid the bills.
Then he faced US with an air OF
increased cheerfulness.
so much all for the velvet" he
remarked with another wink.
OF course it was OF no Importance
to set him right about the material;
as for that, ! didn't care a jolly hang
it he thought they were made of limo
leum! But it gave me the idea OF
just reeking into a corner OF the par
Gel to satisfy myself that its contents
were OF tilmy black silk-and they
we're! l went no further; not for all
the gold OF what's-its-name would
have %profaned the package with fur
ther investigation.
ITO RE CONTINUEDD
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
(To BE C~oNTINUED.)


C~arborundum, the artificial substi.
tute for emery, which is said to rival
the diamond in hardness. is employ
ed, because of its extraordinary re-
sistance to heat, as a coating for the
interior of furnaces. Finely powdered
and made into a paste. 1t is applied
with a brush, like paint, to the brick
lining. 1t is said that a layer of only
two mllimeters in thickness will pro-
tect the bricks from the effects OF the
highest temperature that is produced
in ordinary furnace combustion.
Carborundum is itself a product OF
the electric furnace, being composed
Of silica and carbon fused IN the pres
ence of salt and sawdust.-Harper's
Weekly.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

lead as he laid his hand upon the
door-knob. By Jove, how l wished be
would open it. for the room was get.
ting devilish warm!
And as for things I deplore in
Francis-oh, no. never any Of that
with Jack!"-he stiffened proudly
he may. as l have said, imbibe a lit
tie too much, now and then; but
when it to scandal-well, l
fhave yet to hear the slightest
breath"
A sharp knock cut in abruptly.
Come in" And he swung the door
open.
waiting to see me OF zmportan, bust.
ness.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Almost Entirely.

"Dick" Quay, at the Congress hote.
in Chicago, was talking about a no
torious politician.
And he's worth eleven millions
Mr.. Quay ended.
And is an entirely self-made man
too, l believe" said a correspondent.
Entirely So" Mr.. Quay answered,
except for nine thick coats of white.
wash that have been applied to him
by various investigating committees
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Pussy Man Makes Protest

1t seems to be considered by their EN-.
ployers as an asset in their favor.
IF ] wanted to look like a SIS a.
week counterjumper / might consider
their taste and follow their advice.
But I don't"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Why He

And then Nero had Rome set afire
in every quarter"
ALIAS, how terrible!" murmured lit.
tie Moritz. with an expression Of such
deep anguish that his teacher asked
why it affected him SO much.
Why" said Moritz, lust think of
the poor insurance companies!'-
Fliegende Blaetter.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

Many a pretty woman is merely a
bunch of pride, p~retense and practice.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
The style of Il.

"How do they serve meals from
that lunch wagon?"
." suppose they serve them a la
cart"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

1t is easier to go broke in a hurr
than it is to get rich quick.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Wasted Energy.

The principal difference between a
cur dog and a thoroughbred is that
the cur can pick up his own living.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
Literal,

my good woman, do you scrub
with avidity?"
Nom; with SOAP"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
CHAPTER XIV.

Recover the Pajamas.
Outside. swinging his club and kick
ing his heel in the macadam, l found
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04
The Anxious 8,

The Anxious Seat.
Father-Johnny, go fetch me my
slippers.
Johnny (nervously)-Do you want
both of them or only one, dad?-Ex.
change.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1912-10-04

As a Matter Of Fact.
Does Biffur's stenographer enjoy
his c~onfdence?"
mo. 1t bores her to death"
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-08-08
PLENTY Of Money.

New York Evening Post: Funds
will be ample Is the glad news that
comes from George w. Perkins, rock
ing the cradle of the progressive par
ty in Chicago. His message of good
cheer conveys double reinsurance.
All legitimate expenses OF the conyen-
ton and the new party will be paid:
and one infers that the word legiti
mate will be interpreted with genial
elasticity. Furthermore, the harvest
er trust ally OF Roosevelt has the
reputation of being reasonably thrift
ty citizen who does not like to throw
good money after bad. If he paid out
the large sums with which he has
been credited in the effort to secure
the coloners nomination by the Re-
publicans, and now is willing to go
deep into his jeans again to finance
the third party, he must be hopeful of
getting some return on his investment
in politics. At any rate, he shows an
accurate knowledge Of the ways of the
lavish bull moose campaigners when
he hastens to assure them in advance
that they will have plenty OF money to
handle. But suppose the moving spirit
of an indicted trust were thus flour
fishing his wealth in behalf OF Taft
what bowls would come up like thun-
der 'crost Oyster Bay!
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-08-08

road. When you trim the four corners
on card there are eight smaller cor
ners to cut Then there are sixteen
still smaller corners and so on until
finally you have circle. The rail-
roads are at the circle
OF course, we don't expect this to
continue. If we did we would have
to throw UP our hands. We expect to
recover some OF these losses this fall.
The crop promises are big. But we
are pressing the little corners just
now. 1t is one reason, but not the
principal reason for closing up down
town offices in the smaller cities.
People forget that there is nothing
they buy that the railroads do not
buy. Claim departments have to buy
everything from shoes to diamonds to
make good losses. Railroads are big
buyers in the hardware and provision
line, and the biggest employers of la
Dor in the country"
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-08-08
ROADS ARE UP AGAINST 1T.

'If people understood the difficulties
under which railroads have been OPP
Grating, they would have a different
feeling towards them said an official
in Des Moines interview.
"a sentiment prevails that the high
living costs of the present time are
largely due to the high freight rates.
The truth Is that rates are no higher
than they were ten years ago. The
tendency of rates is always downward.
Rates have never been raised except
ing to keep pace with corresponding
increases of operating expenses. Be
tween crop failures In the south ana
southwest and he interstate com
merce commission roads have been
staggering pretty close to the cushion.
know one road that Yields a big in
fluence in Iowa that used what 1t
made in Iowa last year to overcome
it's losses in the south
Conditions are such that the rail-
roads have been forced to retrench. II
cost one road during February SLIP
to earn every dollar that it made. It
cost another strong road SO cents to
earn every dollar that it made during
that month, and during some of the
other months. A nickel has been a
nickel with the railroads for the last
six months. The roads have been cut
ting corners, but there are no more
big corners to cut on well managed
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-08-08
The woman,s suffrage Question.

Lincoln journal: Representations
of the third party platform contain, as
expected, woman suffrage plank. D-.
Lyman Abbott is brayely following
his contributing editor into the third
party, but is going to reserve the
right OF private judgment on the suff
rage question. In the current issue OF
his magazine he reiterates his view
that suffrage isn't natural right or
duty, that women would be more use
full without being encountered with it,
that they don't want to vote anyway,
and that they certainly should not be
given the chance to vote till they have
shown by majority vote that they
want to vote. When Mr.. Roosevelt
gets around to it he will doubtless
take up the cudgel for his view and
make joint debate of 1t. 1t isn't
really subject for national treatment.
The states have the sole say as to who
shall vote, subject to the constitu.
tional inhibition against discrimination
because Of race or color.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-08-08
CAR SHORTAGE.

Three prime causes are cited by
those predicting serious freight car
shortage this autumn-lack OF surri-
Client coal as result OF trouble at
the mines, deteriorated rolling stock
occasioned by shop strikes and the
unusually heavy demands of traffic,
due largely, to immense crops. An
other cause might be given, namely,
the common practice of Withholding
large numbers OF cars from active
use. This is done extensively by dill
atory shippers, who have habit OF
appropriating cars for storage purpo-
ses, taking their own time to unload
them. Cars often stand for days on
a siding when they should and could
as easily be promptly emptied and
sent directly back into service. This
Is an imposition, in a way, on the
railroads, and yet it would seem that
the railroads could, If they would, put
stop to It, says the Omaha Bee.
But we are quite accustomed to this
annual autumnal car shortage scare
and this year the enormous crop har-
vests help US, as frequently before to
bear up under the weight of the hard
ship. Yet 1t is to be hoped that the
predictions of the scarcity of cars has
been overdrawn, for it would be toe
bad to levy any extraneous imposi
lions upon the products Of our labor
In fiaJd and factory now