The Washington herald., 1912-11-29
The MEASURE OF
TRUE HOSPITALITY
Big.minded Men and Women Con-
tent with Simple Standards.
NJ FRA NCfss sHAFFER.
BY FRANCES sHAFFER.


Once upon a time 1t happened that an
English woman Of high degree was at the
home of a needlewonlan who was en-
broidering a summer robe for her. A
sudden shower had come UP as the din
ner hour approached, and without word
of apology or a hint of difference in sta
ton an invitation was extended TO share
the modest midday meal.
II was unexpected, but the semi-stran-
ger was plainly pleased. DO you mean
you really would like me to stay?' she
asked. She was told, very simply and
naturally, that would be pleasure-and
she remained.
OF service, viands, and all outward man.
ifestations Of hospitality as the guest
was accustomed TO interpret It there was
none. Yet. IN her unexpected role as
guest, the stranger was given glimpse
of the true hospitality which reckons
only with the spirit Of things and sets
aside the artificialities. And many years
afterward she recited the little incident
as one Of the most naturally wholesome
welcomes ever extended to her. Yet she
knew the meaning of hospitality as Law
ish as wealth could make 1t.
Only a Few.
II is only the few who will swallow their
pride. ignore differences in that gracious
way. and welcome a stranger to their
board, whatever it may offer, and with
out the embarrassment of undue apol-
ogies.
But it is a very gracious. open-hearted
way of being received into home, for
1t pleasantly takes much for granted. It
does not require a little more poise and
sacrifice OF pride than few fastldious
housekeepers are, equal to. For In the
desire to show the beautiful clockwork
of their households and the perfection
OF their cooking, they sometimes even
apologize for an array upon which they
have put their finest art.
The fact Is there is SO much of EN-
tertainment" in the social air, so many
formal dinners. SO much display and
ceremony. that there is not much oppor-
tunIty for the simple little impromptu
affair the basis of which is pure friend
ship, without a thought of obligation.
Yet one believes that at heart there
is little real enthusiasm in responding
TO the stilted form, Mr.. and Mrs. Some
body request the pleasure of Mr.. and
Mrs. Everybody's presence at dinner"
while there is something warm and de-
lightful in the spontaneous-'we would
love to have you take dinner with us
tomorrow evening And it is not easy
to understand why men and women who.
at best, are nothing more than just men
and women, are willing to address each
other so unnaturally. with cordtality and
personality all buried in perfunctory for
mality. For unless one is fond of dis
play and ceremony the balance OF pleas
ure all goes 10 the little gathering
prompted only by love and friendship.
The pretentious affair to which many
guests are hidden may have its place,
but somehow II is too ceremonious and
formal a place to be given a warm spot
in our hearts.
An Everyday Affair.
They tell us that our grandmothers
were very simple and royal in their hos
pitality; that their latchstriug was al
ways free; their doors wide open to the
unexpected visitor, who was welcomed
with as much earnestness and sincerity
as IL all was in readiness for the un-
lCoked-for guest.
But, you see, with our grandmothers
hospitality was more OF an everyday af-
fair. There was not SO much centering
of energies upon Il few elaborate func-
tions, where originality in decorations
and startling effects score a mighty
count: and so they had the time and the
spirit to let their hospitality reach out
20 encompass every day in the year.
Probably there were the few who
reached up and out for novelties but not
in the same startlingly bizarre manner
We read OF in these days-yesterday a
dinner to pet dogs Of proud lineage, to-
Gay the strange spectacle of men high
in social life jumping through golden
rings to furnish a new note of entertain
ment for a favored few!
But don't you believe that big-minded
men and women, then and now. are con-
tent with quieter. simpler standards of
entertainment and of hospitality? 1t
makes one understand just why that
English woman appreciated an invita-
tion, with the simple background of sin
cerity. And it makes one quite sure that
she would far rather be hidden to a sim
pie little AFFAIR where the charm of kin
dred spirits was in the air than to a
shOwy function that seems to serve no
better purpose than to revive slumbering
emotions.