The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1912-09-19
USELESS

right shade"
"Uh-huh."
Henry" said Mrs. Sweet petulant
y, Il don't believe you arc listening
1t all"
"Course I am" returned her hus-
band, 40 he turned to the sporting
page. you said something about Q
shade"
Fl SAID" repeated Mrs. Sweet, with
emphatic distinctness, "the ribbon you
matched for me isn't the right
shade"
Mr.. Sweet lowered his paper and
looked ACROSS at his wife.
Its baby blue, isn't it," he asked.
Eyes, t u.s." returned his wife.
''But you know, Henry, l haven't been
able to wear that shade of blue this
last ten years."
MI. Sweet lifted the paper to his
eyes, then lowered 1t again.
"Why not!" he asked.
Mrs. Sweet studied her empty tea
cup.
"Why not?' her husband persisted.
Because 1 am growing stout" she
answered, reluctantly.
MI. Sweet stared.
How does that bar you?" he
asked.
Some people are so dense," his
wife returned, .pointedly.
Mr.. Sweet grinned.
Am I worse than the majority" he
asked.
you are worse t~han-some." his
wife qualified.
For instance?"
Mrs. Sweet balanced q spoon on the
edge OF her teacup.
"Cite a person." her husband ohal
lenged.
Il could" asserted Mrs. Sweet.
"Do," her husband encouraged.
There's MI. Joy" began Mrs.
Sweet.
who's he?" interrupted her hus-
band.
He lives in the brown cottage
across the street." explained Mrs.
sweet.
Fellow with Dundreary wind
breakers?" questioned her husband.
Il am sure his whiskers are very
NICE" said Mrs. Sweet.
How'd you like to see me break
out in that kind of hailstone catch:
ers?" grinned her husband.
HIN"
Say it," urged Mr.. Sweet. Don't
spare my feelings"
A twinkle appeared In Mrs. Sweets
eyes, as she returned:
"You couldn't wear them for the
same reason that ! can't wear baby
blue"
disqualified because Of overweight,
eh?" grinned Mr.. Sweet. But about
the gentleman with the microbe-catch-
ers; Is be less obtuse than II"
Mrs. Sweet nodded.
Got any other good qualities I
lack?" went on her husband.
His wife can trust him to bring
the exact things she sends him for"
returned Mrs. Sweet.
Good eye, eh? Pa%rticularize some
more"
He anticipates her slightest
wishes"
Must be a WIZARD" commented Mr..
Sweet. go on"
He looks after the furnace in win.
ter, without grumbling; and. in sum.
mer, takes care of the lawn"
Model husband admitted MI.
Sweet. "But how did you get such
a straight line on him?"
Their servants and ours are &C.
Q~uainted." explained Mrs. Sweet.
Il see" grinned her husband, much
enlightened. Anything else Mr..
Model Husband does that I don't and
night?"
When the weather permits. he
takes the baby out for an airing"
II took our out the other night"
grinned Mr.. Sweet. "and when we
returned you nearly broke up the
game"
"You ought to be ashamed Of
yourself. Henry Sweet" said Mrs.
Sweet Indignantly. "The idea Of
keeping that boy out till long past
midnight"
He's 49," asserted her husband.
And he feels the weight of his years,
A0S A0 S0AA yOUs
Don't forget my shopping money"
Mrs. Sweet reminded him, az her hus.
band arose from the table.
"How much do you need?" he ask.
ID. taking out his pocketbook.
twenty-five dollars will be SUN.
cient," said Mrs. Sweet, after am mo-
ment's hesitation.
Mr.. Sweet took four f~ive-dollar bills
hom his wallet.
by the way" he ventured casually,
II suppose Nj. Joy never short.
changes on his wife when she asks
for shopping money!"
"Mr. Joy isn't in any business" Mrs.
Sweet admitted, reluctantly. "You
Sse, his wife takes pupils"
II thought 30" grinned Mr.. Sweet,
@ no slipped one of the bills back into
the pocketbook and handed his wife
11b. 'There always II a ny In the
ointment somewhere. Here's my car
seeming. 'Bysl"