davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
A DEAL IN SAND.

A dapper little man entered the Of
fee Of building supplies concern and
asked for the manager.
4 am he" sssd the head OF the con-
Germ who happened to be present.
How are you selling your sand?"
In five car lots we"
The little man held up his hand. a.
Il wouldn't require that much" he
exclaimed
''fE single cars, it
But again the customer raised his
hand.
Il wish only enough"
If you only wish wagon load, Of
course, that's different"
The little man shifted from one foot
to the other, then explained:
Il am making a sandpile for my
baby to play in, and only want about
peck. Ill take 1t with me in this
basket"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
"a. L. Dacy, Associate Horticulturist
West Virginia Experiment Station.)

"a. Z. Dacy, Associate Horticulturist,
aWest Virginia Experiment Station.)
According to the last United States
Census, West Virginia produced, in
1909, from 42,621 acres, 4077,066 bush
els of potatoes, an average yield Of
95a bushels per acre. The total value
of the crop was $2,27S,63S, the average
value Of the crop per acre being
$6S.46. In total value, the crop was
exceeded by corn, wheat. timothy alone
and timothy and clover. In average
value per acre the potato crop ranked
second, being exceeded by tobacco
alone It was followed by the above
mentioned crops, as follows: Corn,
$17.61 per acre; wheat, $12.s9; hay
End forage, $10.57. From these figures
1t will be seen that the potato crop
Is one of the most important grown
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
A NOVEL LAW SUIT.

Bluefeld, w. Va.-Dayid Edwards
has filed suit against the N. & w. rail-
road company for $4,000 personal dam
ages. Edwards, it is alleged, was as
sisting in unloading some heavy rails
for the railroad company. Working
with Edwards were a half dozen
Greeks. When they were ready to
drop the rail they said so, but Ed
wards. being unable to understand
their talk, held on to his end as long
as he could. which was not very long.
AS result the rail fell on his hand.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Great Saving To State.

Figures obtained from the books in
the office of the auditor show that the
state has saved lot of money since
the law went into effect placing state
officials on a regular salary who were
formerly paid on a commission basis.
The law effects the pay of the secre-
tary of state and the auditor since
1905, and from then until now the
commissions which have gone into
the state treasury, which were for
merly retained by the officials,
amounts to $2S1,2O764. The fees col
lectsd by the secretary of state in that
period amount to $142,51419, and the
statutory fees collected by the auditor
amount to $174,233.24.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

Lime Is Of value to the soil because
Of its power to destroy acids Perhaps
# might be better to say because of
the fact that it is able to correct GER
tain conditions In the soil which are
detrimental to the growth of ordinary
farm crops. Lime is of little value as
q fertilizer. Most soils contain enough
lime to take care OF the needs of crops
The only material lacking in most
coils are nitrogen, phosphorus or po-
tassium. None Of these are found in
lime. But under certain conditions II
Isl found that clover viii not do well
and the ordinary sorrel tends to take
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
On His Guard.

Two richly upholstered danes sat
on the hotel veranda and watched tho
wild waves dancing the turkey trot.
THAT young man yonder is reputed
to be very RICH" said one.
Y He Is hopeless, however" declared
the other. 'No girl will catch him"
why do you say that?"
II told him yesterday that your.
daughter looked sweet enough to eat
and he responded hastily that he was
strict vegetarian"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Not superstltIous. But

Yes, we are going to start on our
European trip the first week in Sep
TENDER, instead Of the second
What's the reason?"
Well my husbands birthday comes
on the 18th. He found by looking at
a calendar that 1t would fall on Friday,
and he'd rather not be on the ocean
that day. He says he's not supersti-
tious, but he'll be dod-squizzled II he
is going to tempt fate by plunging into
triple expansion hoodoo like that!
Don't some men make you tired?"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
MAN LoosEs LEFT Foor.

Bluefeid, w. Vain an accident at
Keystone Mike Senelk, foreign
miner, lost his left foot. The man
was walking along the tracks and was
sot seen by, the engineer until after
he was struck. The victim of the ac-
cident lived at Keystone and was
taken to the office of DR., Steele for
treatment. His left foot was cut OF
at the ankle but he was otherwise
uninjured. 1t seems probable that
he endeavored to get eff the tracks.
but tripped on the rail and fell.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Defined.

PA, what is pessimist?"
"A pessimist, my son, is man who
firmly believes that telephone oper-
ator takes delight in saying, The
lines busy, when, as matter OF
fact, 1t would be less trouble for her
to make the connection"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

its place. The clover or legume is es-
sential to the economic maintenance
OF soil fertility. In order to secure
good crops of the legume It has been
found necessary to have supply OF
lime in the soil. This lime seems to
make conditions more favorable for
such crops as the clovers and the rea-
son usually assigned for its effect -
that lime destroys the acid present N
the soil.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
BAPTIsTs WILL HOLD MEETING.

st. Adams, W. Va.--The forty
seventh annual convention of the
Baptist General Association of West
Virginia win be held at st. Adams,
Kanawha county, on October 16 and
will last till october 20. The associa-
tion represents $4,000 white Baptists
in this state, and 667 church organiza-
tions, holding property valued at
81 ,202,867
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
SHINGLES In School.

q, see they are now manufacturing
asbestos shingles which will not
burn" said the teacher
We'll, don't know about their not
burning" said the boy, refectively.
81 guess it will depend how they are
used"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Well. He Became So.

Children" asked the visitor who
was addressing the school, how many
of you can tell me what 1t was that
Napoleon's soldiers used to call him?pp
Nobody answered.
Think a moment. Little"
Still nobody spoke up.
Little Corp"
"A little corpulent!' shouted the
children.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Empty Lives.

Some people seem to be able to
get through the world with very little
trouble"
Il know 1t. There are lots of peo-
pie who never have anything more
important than love and marriage and
births and deaths to think Of"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Owes Life to His Horse.

Frank Tracy, OF Wallingford Conn.
claims that his life was saved by his
horse Starlight He went to Oak
dale tavern. three miles away, witt.
load OF baggage and was so badly
chilled on the return that he fell in
an unconscious condition into lis
wagon His morse. turning corners
with unerring accuracy. brought
Tracy to his place OF business: where
aid was promptly Afforded After
working over him for two hours the
doctors pronounced him out Of gan.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Oh, Joy.

E Murray, hurrayW
"Why SO happy. girl?"
This summer resort is deadly dull,
but am amply repaid for my trip"
"As to how?"
MY poodle has gained an ounce
and a half"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Two Rules.

Il have made it a rule to mix GER
tain amount of play with my work"
Well, there's only one plan that
seems to me to beat that, and l have
adopted it. ! make it rule to mix
certain amount of work with my
play"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
a Good one.

do you enjoy riding in your new
automobile, Mrs. Comeup?'
"Oh, immensely. We've got such
fine chefanyear."
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Reckless Extravaoance.

These masquerades are too ex-
pensive," said Mrs Lapsling. "A
neighbor of mine went to one of them
once. garbled as Queen Elizabeth, and
the dress cost her $50"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
crook trout for Minnesota.

Minnesota is to add to its deiectable
resources the brook front Eggs from
Pacific coast salmon are to be dis.
tributed in the lakes about che Twin
cities. Thus viii the east and the
west meet In the basket Of the Ssh
srman.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
And Both Know II,

This meeting man withf dyed
whiskers is a funny proposition"
"As to how?''
you pretend not to know it, and
he pretends to believe that you really
don't know it."
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Very Likely.

His Honor gazing at intoxicated
prisoner-What is he charged with,
officer?
Officer (newly appointed)-Oi don't
know, yer honor. but OF think it's
shtraight whisky.-Judge.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Does Seem Cold.

Gosh, this New York society is
cold blooded." declared the man who
had broken in from the west.
How now?'
AN overnight visitor at my house
fell over a chair and parked his shin.
! hear now he has consulted lawyer
as to the liability of host for acci-
dent to guest"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
confederates Marching on Mooreflerd

vi fI00iSHCt0s
& The annual Confederate Reunion in
West Virginia will be held this year
at Moorefield, Hardy county, on Octo-
Der $40. Gen. Charles s. Peyton of
Ronceryerte, Commander Of the End
Brigade, requests all camps in the
brigade to select delegates and ar
range for credential representation,
He urges all his old comrades to ac-
cept this opportunity to visit the ia
nous South Branch Valley in which
many of them marched and fought
during the great war Of the early six.
ties. The people of Moorefield are
preparing hospitable welcome for
the old heroes and everything posi-
BILE will be done for their entertain
ment while they fraternize once more
and touch the chords of "auld lang
syne." The West Virginia Division of
Sons of Confederate Veterans is also
expected to participate in this reunion
and will be welcomed at Moorefield.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Points of View.

First Cabman-Paper says there's
'ole districts of London where you
couldn't find a 'ansom If you wanted
one
Second Cabman-Bloomin' lot more
difficult to find the bloke as wants one.
Punch.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Too Much Of 4 Strain.

1T is tragic to be an exile from
ones native land"
mo doubt that is true in most
cases. but l find>it hard to shed any
tears over kings who are exiles in
Paris"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
EXPLAINED.

Il hear Miss Strongmind has chuck
ed poor Thompson" said Dabney.
Sad, but true" said Wilkins.
why, thought Thompy was a
brick!" said Dabney.
He is" said wilkins. That's why
she threw him, ! guess. Judge.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
His Accustomed Attitude,

May claim your attention a mo-
ment? I am representing the Back
to the Land movement. and
Nothing doing: I'm already com
vert always keep my back to the
land. Good morning"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Syndlcated.

He called her darling years ago,
Ere care had marked her brow:
But others share her love, and 30
He calls her mother now.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Renartee.

Mrs. Benham-Do you remember
that gave you no decided answer the
first time you proposed?
Benham-I remember that you sus-
pended sentence,--Judge.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

ger. Tracy says the horse will never
have to haul another load. The horse
had the home instinct SO many ami
mails have. and this led to the relief
Of his master The Christian Herald
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

Sunday School Teacher-What is
Solomon's advice to the sluggard?
Little Girl latter a severe mental
effort -Go find the ants. consider
their ways. and get busy.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Eadinn AWAY.

Patience-All OF our fondest tradi-
lions and beliefs are being swept
away.
Patrice- What's wrong now?
why, this paper says that whale
bone Is not bone, strictly speaking. bu.
bristles found in the mouth Of the
whale by which the animals are en-
abled to entrap small fish for food"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Evasiye.

Pop, why don't they, send pussies
after the rats on the ships?"
My son. that requires categorical
answer"
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
MAKING Matters Worse

The man who has a corn on s toe
Is apt to wear a look of woe,
But he'll appear more troubled yet,
II you by chance step on his pet
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
After Vacation.

Folks tell us we're brown as a berry,
When we finally get back to town.
Will some one please rise and inform us
Just what kind of berries are brown?
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

Poultry should be shipped when the
demand is good and the market is
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Retort Courteous.

Club Member (who has overheard
no good of himself) - OFT
slider who ought to be kicked, am j?
So that's what you think of me, is
It?
Culprit-My dear fellow, that's only
what say. think lot more of
you.-Punch.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Inspected New River.

Messrs.. r. G. Hewes and Frank
Compton, of the United States engi-
Hneer's Office, have returned from an
inspection tour along the waters OF
New river, between Hinton, this state,
and Radford, Va. The inspection was
made in accordance with the rivers
and harbors act, providing for an ex-
animation Of certain rivers with view
to their Improvement. The two gentle
men report that though their duties
kept them busy all the time. the trip
was thoroughly enjoyed and very in
teresting.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Capt. Jackson To Be Promoted.

1t has been learned at the office OF
the adjutant general that Capt. Chas.
Jackson, of Company E. Second infan-
try, Parkersburg, has been selected by
Col. Charles e. Morrison as adjutant
Of the regiment. Capt. Jackson is one
of the most popular officers in the
West Virginia service. He succeeds
Capt Thomas r. Cowell, who was adju-
tant for number of years, and who
resigned some time ago because ofghis
business not permitting him to devote
any time to the military.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
. August Fire Report.

-HUyust FfTt HepoFt.
During the month Of August there
were 20 fires in West Virginia, as re-
ported to the Office Of state fire mar
Hshal. The value of the property de-
stroyed or partially destroyed was
$203,042, and the loss sustained was
$S2,859. The insurance amounted to
$129,I75. lightning caused one of the
fires, spontaneous combustion one,
defective wiring three, child with
matches one. rats with matches one,
defective fues two, unknown eleven,
lightning two, adjoining Buildings
three, incendiary two.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

She-So you did not enjoy your au-
tomobile trip abroad?
! He--No; they made such a fuss
over there whenever we killed any
body.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03

Political Orator (who has spoken
for an hour and a half)-And now.
fellow citizens, what shall say moref
Tired Man Cat back of halD Good
night.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
Excellent Program Is Announced.

4 !, j. + Z
The program for the fifth annual
session of the Layman's association of
the West Virginia conference Of the
Methodist Episcopal church has been
received here. The session will be
held in the Davis and Elkins Memorial
Presbyterian church, at Elkins, Thurs
ady and Friday, October II and IS. On
the opening night Bishop Earl Gran
ston, of Washington, and Stuart F.
Reed, of this city, will make addresses.
At 9 o'clock the following morning the
report of officers will be made DR.. ].
O. Randall, of Philadelphia, will make
an address on 1.-THE Commission On
Evangelism" and DR.. Franklin Hamil-
ton Chancellor, of Washington, will
have as the subject of his address
"The American University" At 1880
o'clock in the evening, there will be
a joint meeting of the ministers and
laymen at the First M. E. church, fol
lowed by an address by DR.. c. G..
Doney, president of the West Virginia
Wesleyan college, Buckhannon, and
also one by DR.. Thomas Nicholson, cor
responding secretary board of educa-
ton Of New York City.
The Progressive West Virginian. [volume] (Williamson, W. Va.) 1911-1913, 1912-10-03
AUGUST Was BUSY Month.

August Was Busy Month.
The month of August in the Office Of
the secretary of state proved one OF
the busiest in the history of the office,
according to the report which has
been made by Secretary Reed The
receipts amounted to s6,706.80; in
crease in capital. $625.50; foreign cor
pcration certificates, $4,000; certif-
Gates to resident corporations, $40;
to nonresident corporations. sS93.75;
from land tax. s2,Ss4.o5; tax on great
seal, s204: sale of books, $1,000; at
torneys' fees to auditor. $40; As char.
tiers issued
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1912-02-23
BULLETS IN BATTLE.
Death Wounds and Flesh Wounds and
the FEELING When Struck.

In Serving the Republic" General
Nelson A. Miles says that like every
other soldier who has seen much active
service, he is often asked how IL feels
to be wounded He himself was
wounded four times and twice almost
fatally. so he is able 10 speak from
experience. He says:
zone Is often asked how IL seems TO
be wounded in battle. The flight Of
bullet is quicker than thought and has
passed through a flesh wound before
one realizes that he has been struck.
have seen bodies Of men dead on the
field OF battle where the brain had
been pierced and death had been In
stantaneous. They would remain In
every position Of the manual Of arms
with an anxious look, frown or
mile on their cold and rigid faces.
"Mv wounds received at Fair Oaks,
fredericksburg and Petersburg were
'csh wounds and disabled me but a
hort time. While riding down the
inc at Charlottesville one Of the enc
ny's bullets struck my metallic belt
plate with great force. This caused
slight deviation as II entered the body
The result was an instant deathly sick
ening sensation. My sword dropped
from my right hand; my scobbard and
belt dropped to the left. was com
pletely paralyZed below the waist. My
horse seemed TO realize what had oc
cured. He stopped, turned and walked
slowly back, | holding to the pomme'
Of the saddle with my hands. We
soon reached a group Of soldiers. who
took me off and, placing me In a bIan-
ket, carried me to the Chancellorsville
House and pulled dead man or
couch to make room for me-"
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1912-02-23
GRANITEVILLE

Mr.. d. S. Jencks has had a telephone
installed in his residence.
Mrs. Rufus Harris, who has been very i'll
lately, is reported much better.
Rev Harris Barbour occupied the pull
pit at the Baptist Church last Sunday.
A drama and entertainment was given at
the Baptist Church last Friday evening by
the T, M. X. Club,
The Ladies' Auxiliary connected with the
fire company attended the Auburn Volun-
teer Fire Co.'S. fair Saturday night, in a
special car.
1t is understood that the house on the
corner Of Angel Avenue and the Green
vile Road, now occupied by Mr.. Chad
wick, will soon be altered over into a
store.
The concert and dance held in the Fire
Station Tuesday eveffing by the Ladies
Auxiliary, connected with the Fire Co,
was considered a success in every way.
The committee in charge comprised Mr..
Timothy Rhodes, chairman; Mrs. James
Charnley, Miss Myrtle Whipple, Mrs.
Levi Jowett, Mrs. Walter Stafford and
Miss Ada Stafford.
A meeting of the Graniteville Volunteer
Fire Association was held OH Monday
evening. The designations of Albert
Parker and Albert Mitchell, president and
vice president of the association were ac-
cepted and the following elected: Presi-
dent-Timothy Rhodes; Vice President
Harry G, Davis; Treasurer-George A.
Carter; Committeemen-Wal Stafford
and Newton Shawcross.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1912-02-23
Let Georue Do II.

Governor Woodrow Wilson Of New
Jersey, while campaigning strenuous
ly In the interests OF the Democratic
candidates. came to a small hostelry
In Sussex County, In the northern sec.
ton OF the state.
The waiter handed the presidential
possibility the menu card. but the
Governor. tired from the days cam.
paigning. pushed II away and said:
Now George, don't want to both
er with that Take II away and go
out and get me good dinner. Get
the best YOU have. That's all"
The waiter brought in the dinner
which the Governor ate. AS he was
leaving the dining room the waiter
said: "Mistah Wilson. If any o. YOU
friends from down at Princeton what
can't read neither comes up this way
you Jest send 'em to George an LII
take care o en- an right
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1912-02-23
SEED GERMlN NATION.
In Some Cases the Development Is Re-
markabIy Rapid.

In Some Cases the Development Is Re-
markabIy Rapid.
1t has been said that the seed OF the
globe turnip when growing increases
its own weight fifteen times within a
minute. The seed of this turnip is
exceedingly minute, being not larger
than the twentieth part Of an inch in
few months the seed will be developed
by the soil into twenty seven millions
OF times the bulk OF the original, and
this in addition to considerable
bunch Of leaves.
On peat ground turnips have been
found to increase by growth 1890
times the weight of their seed each
day they stood.
The funguses offer an instance Of re
markably rapid growth. The great
puff ball will attain the size Of pump
kin in a single night, and Lindley cal
culated that the cells whereof II iS
composed will multiply at the rate OF
G0,OO0O00 n minute.
Many seeds germinate in n very
short period-thc cress in two days,
spinach, turnips and kidney beans In
three days, lettuce in four, melons ana
gourds i'm five, most Of the grain seed
in n week and hyssop at the end of Il
month But others remain for Il very
long period without showing signs OF
germination-Ne York Herald.