The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-06-25
%l1vERS fro" STICK
~ by "Stick"- Himself
Wise Men From the East.-As the Great Northern

Wise Men From the East.-As the Great Northern
coast train heading west. arrived at the local station
last evening and the usual number of through passen-
gers descended to the platform 7" stretch their legs
two mental heaNyweights swung down from the tourist
sleeper. and so great was the depression that the bal
ance of the town tipped up. Their special mission
seemed to he to make fun of the country and the
town and the people. just for a starter they purchased
a copy of the Times and No One supposed in a loud
voice IT was printed on a hand press. and wondered
what they found to write about up here. No. Two was
anxious to see if Mrs. Jones had had a tea party lately.
Addressing a gray-whiskered professional man of
this city as "Old Scout No. One inquired as to the
population, and when advised that 1T was about $4,000,
he seemed to doubt it. expressing the alleged opinion
that it was about 800.
Asked where he hailed from, he replied: Il am
from Atlantic City. myself. Wouldn't YOU know l am
an easterner?" He vas assured there was no doubt
about it.
Asked by another hystander how the graft was
coming down there, he seemed surprised to know the
report had gotten so far from home. and inquired as
10 how the information had arrived here. whereupon
he was advised that a man with an ox-team had passed
through here last week and told one of the settlers.
Yes said he. with a swagg which made one
dizzy "1 MAS N ~ tho yane and drageed az Ooo from
oh. no replied the Grand Forxer. that wouldn't
be enough to get your feet wet in a poker game in
this burg"
Well, said the wise man. TIM going OUT to the
western coast to see what they got. but they will have
them all cheated" and as he swung onto his tourist
sleeper the resistance of his mental avordupos' all
most stopped the train.
Cheated is right" replied the hystander-and the
wise mon were on their way to the unexplored west
where they are slated to astonish the henighted natives.
May the Lord help them to get through.
Appreciative Ed.-"king Ed. :" must have been a
Jolly old soul. as many a good warn is told of him. The
latest comes from East st. Louis. where a woman tells
of her brother, ]. ]. 0"Toole. who sat in with Ed. for
a little game of draw, finally scooping $4,000 from the
king. who In admiration of oToole's deXterity. luck. or
whatever You are amind to cali it. presented him with
a beautiful gold purse.
His majesty had his fonrs all the time. and I
pulled in one of my eights. after holding up three
Fights and an ace for a KICKER OToole said. when
asked regarding the game.
We have seen a great many poker games but never
heard Of anyone being so liberal-did You. Hiram?
at Irish Landing. on Old river near Sacramento. a few
DAYS ago when he attempted to hold up the passengers
of two launches. One fellow hit HIM on the Jaw. an.
other knocked him into the water while the others
pelted him till he drowned to DEATH
Out at Seattle a man named Morrison married a
widow on the 5th and on the 23d they hung out the
skiddoo sign and separated. During the eighteen days
of their married life. Morrison told the Judge. the topic
of conversation was life Insurance.. she persistins in
and he resisting his taking out an insurance policy.
No wonder he got leary."
VERY
There was a fair maiden name Bate
Who once ansled to capture a mate;
She caught Mr.. Fish
And thus got her wish
Then the fish and the bait met their fate.
Wonder what Teddy will call the new party. Sup
pose it will he the Square Dealers.