The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-07-06

penter in this town can make I'll chew
my hat
ave been waste of words Mr.. Bowser
would have persisted on the scafold rath-
er than give up his plans
| The lumber arrived. He had ordered
stuff two inches wide by one in thickness
| heavy enough for a bull pen.
You don't mean that you are going
| to, began Mrs. Bowser when MI.
Bowser waved her away with:
Run along, now L think 1 shall be
able to boss this job"
saw was needed, and he went to a
! hardware store and paid rs cents for one.
Then he had to buy new screwdriver
and screws. He must have wire for the
make second trip. He would also need
can of black paint and a brush
Inc flrst thing was to get the length
and width of the window frames so as to
| saw his strips to a length. Mr.. Bowser
found that he had no carpenters rule
and that Mrs: Bowser had no tapeline,
Lets see? Let's see?" he unused as he
squinted around. THAT window is about
five feet eight in height by-by-.''
You can't do that way" said Mrs.
Bowser as she came styling around. That
window is at least six feet high, and /
| guess two inches more
two feet ten
BY three feet two, you mean''
Woman, will you oblige me by enter
requested to come out and give advice?
Yes, 1 will, but if you saw the stuff
~ your measure you Will waste it
Mr.. Bowser went ahead and sawed He
could have measured with the first strip
off and found whether it was too long
or too short but Mrs. Bowser had mixed
she didn't know it all.
Presently there We're four strips ready
to be fastened together. The ends must
be morticed. Mr.. Bowser had no chisel
but he had plenty of confidence in the
family AK. He sawed and he split, and
Mrs. Bowser peeped out of a back win
dow and grinned. Things were working
around to produce situation.
Instances have been known where the
four corners of a window screen objected
to coming together for the general good.
Here was such case. The custom is to
haul and pull and twist and batter them
together. If sufficient strength is used
any objection can be overcome. BY the
use of nails and screws and muscles and
swear words Mr.. Bowser got his frame
together and stood it up against the fence.
Not long enough nor wide enoughr'
called Mrs. Bowser from window.
SO you still persist?' he answered, as
Hold it up to the window and see if
am not afraid
Mr.. Bowser started off for the tacks
only Mrs. Bowser had mixed in again.
He would run that job or perish.
Sure you haven't made any mistaken
queried the hardware man, when the fig
ureS We're given him.
Ct think my eyesight is good yet" was
the reply.
ooh. then, you measured your frame
by your eye, Ell? Well, you shall have
what you call for"
When Mr.. Bowser got home with the
wire he proceeded to cut the length in
two by his eye and then to tack one
length on. There were six inches too
much of it, but he calmly cut off the sur
plus. Then ne was called in to lunch.
When he was ready to tackle his job
again Mrs. Bowser went into a neigh
boris to see sick child, and was absent
an hour. AT the gate when she returned
she found a policeman, who said:
Il have to tell you, ma am, that I've
got your husband in the house and tele-
phoned for your family doctorl''
Why, what's the matter with Mr..
Bowser.''
81 was going up the alley, ma'am, as
he was trying to fit a screen to a win
dow. 1t was too short and too narrow.
1t was squeegawed- 1t was flip-flopped
and flimflammed. 1t a daisy, for
sure"
Yes"
And your husband suddenly fell a-cuss-
ing and a-whooping, and a-shouting And
he flung that screen down and jumped
on it. And he grabbed up the ak and
hammered 1t. And-and-then-"
''Yes?2'
''And he went into a fit of some kind
and fell down and rolled over, and rolled
up his eyes almost to his ears, and I've
got bet with the cook that he cashes in
before
But Mrs Bowser was inside the house.
She always overlooks Mr. Bowser's crimes
copyrighted, 1912, by Associated Literary
Press)
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