Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1912-10-03

ia tisAC bOVNs L|st LIS bIGQN-
fast table makes her husband think
about her "A whole lot during the day.
a Teller who gifts his picture o
with his hand up to his head. has
always got u purity good opinion OF
himself.
Why kick about the hot weather."
says Han Purdy. IF there wasn't no
hot weather there wouldn't be no corn
and no rye and If there wasn't no corn
and no rye, there wouldn't be no
whisky
III begins to- look as though Elmer
Jones may propose to the milliner
again this season. He has already got
three orders for crayon portraits this
month. Prosperity always makes Ell
mer sentimental.
There is only one way to hasten
the kingdom come faster than by set
TIN on "A key of powder an smokin'
a pipe. and that is by goin' out in a
II that has a sail in it.
Hank Tumms Of our village is get
tin high toned. He sent ~ shirt to
the laundry last week.
The only thing that has got a sew
In circle beat for news is a barber
shop.
There amt no use tryin' TO do any
thing for ii Teller who cntoys poor
health.
Now and then you run across an
old fashioned Teller who wears his
spectacles up over the top of his head
and never can find 'em.
No girl is Il bit better than her folks
until she has spent one term at a fin
ishin' school.
A vocal teacher says singin' is good
Ter the health, but the grand opera
! stars amt in the singin' business for
that purpose.
A nice little "friendly' game always
sounds suspicious to me.
There are a lot of political experts
who can't make a ivin' at 1t or any
thing else.
A new silk dress attracts a lot Of re-
marks from all the women in n town
under 5000.
1t seems as though the Declaration
OF Independence should have been sign
ed mt Reno.
Every time a hardened bachelor bats
an v in the direction of any eligible
woman. the gossips kin all near we'd
ding bells ringing in the distance.
Every Teller at the resort had pro-
posed to Miss Pansy Tibbitts exceptin'
one and she is waiting 10 land him so
she kin come home with Il batting
average of 1000.
Some young women are born foolish
and others go u riding In canoes with
moon-eyed Romeos.
a nero gifts along all right until
somebody names a Scent seegar after
him. Then it is all off.
The most forlOrn critter I know OF
~ q Keller who has mortgaged his
house n lot to buy an oatmobiie and
then hasn't got enough money to run II.
-
THE SUMMER RESORT.
Same old beach.
Same old peach
With the same old winsome smile. !
Same old stare,
Same hot air
And the same flirtatious STYLE.
Same old view.
Nothing new
Same old skeeters there to sting.
Same old sand,
same old band,
same cash register to ring.
Same old drones,
Chaperones.
Sitting in the rocking chairs.
Same old walks.
Same old talks, |
Same old spocning on the stairs.
same canned food.
Boiled and stewed.
Same Transparent slice Of meat.
Same old girls.
Same old curls,
Same old slot machine to beat.
Same old Junk
Same old bunk.
Same old stunt and nothing more |
Same price list, ~
Same bridge whist,
Same old never ending bore.
SaOHAL: Stay at home and raise |
'1 pickles IN the kitchen garden.
THE SUBJECT ETERNAL,
they harp upon It every day
And have for decades past.
OF all the campaign arguments
It 70 the 6rst ana last, !
u nangs around like BanQuo's ehost
It g the thing they argue most
tho entirA fRnv |
NOBODY understands It we'll
And most folks no at all. !
But stu Il II the subject on
Which al the speakers bawl.
1nes- We fought It out for years ana
Ihey,ve argued day and night.
159t still It doesn't seem az though
They'll ever az It right.
InSy're at It once again this year,
They Will forget It never.
FOR men may come and men may 70. |
Hut the tariff goes OF forever.
a MODERN REFUSAL
Then you won't marry, rne?"
No. Archibald, I viii not"
~ wlll change your mind ana
fused me?''
Positively not" !
.1 Ah,s ! s'SpsDoss is lna'."
And there will be no come back9.
None"
You realize what you are doine3,
~. : DC. I wouldn't marry you SCI
YOU were 3 last nan on earth"
6achelor, Il hays ldons my duty.
an angsl, Naggie. { am soine
g ec@u YOU = box OF aoWore. iawooI
aIraid you mt1ht accept: ma. Nov.
ns.sSs.snnc osens @eeppotnted Ia love. I VIII