The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1912-09-07
whom l mean" .,
"Corpernicus, suppose"


mo, sir. Copernicus was not the
first one. Before him the Bishop Of
Ratisbon, Regimontanus, was teaching
that theory of planetary revolution"
That may be possible
Excuse me. professor, why do we
call the age in which literature, arts
and science flourshed the golden age
of Leo X?"
Why? Because Leo x was an ard
ent admirer of classic literature and a
magnanimous patron of the arts and
sciences"
You don't say! Leo, a Pope, and at
the same time took a great interest
in fine arts. Well, l declared"
1T seems to me, fellow. you are
fooling meg"
Not at all! Those are only doubts.
.intolerable doubts. would kick
against the monks if had reasons but
these doubts do not let me rest. Now.
professor, ia 1t true that the first free
schools were opened by De La Sale"
Yes, by the Frenchman, De la
Sale"
Il understand you mean to say by
the Catholic priest De la Sale And
the first monk who cared for the deaf
mutes was not that Spaniard Pedro ae
Ponce and after him the priest
L'Epee?"
Yes, and now stop, you blockhead!"
Don't get hot, professor It is not
our fault that history is full of these
black DEVILS Moreover, read that
u monk by the name of Schwarz in
vented gunpowder; the monk Guido
dArezzo the gamut and laid down the
foundation for harmony; a monk from
Bavaria the process for glass painting:
the Jesuit Secchi is especially distin-
gufshed for his discoveries in spectro-
seopic analysis and in solar and stellar
physics; the Jesuit"
Shut up! You are guying me. DO
not take me for lightning rod"
You're right. you're right, profes.
sor. The first lightning rod was not
made by Franklin, but 1t was invented
by the Premonstratensian monk Dr.
visch. You can read that in anv up-
to-date cyclopedia"
FOR heavens sake, hold your
tongue. You are too talkative,'
"Ah. the greatest polylgot of modern
times was Cardinal Mezzofanti. He
was talker! He knew only seventy.
eight languages and dialects, and
talked fifty-six."
That'll do, you silly goose. Get out
of here"
In what direction? The deacon Ea.
via Gioja, who improved the compass
about the year 1900, could certainly
tell me.'
What's the matter? You're getting
the brain fever. fellow" 5saFi 81
What. If I have the brain fever. 20
and get the fire engines which were
first introduced by the cisterclau
monks. and the Capuchins were down
to the seventeenth century the first
fremen Of Paris"
III you don't shut up now, you'll fly
out the window. you Internal rascal"
In aeriel heights. Oh, truly. The
nrst balloon was made by the monl;
6ertnoid Gusmac sixty years before
Montgolfieri, and in 1870 this monk
assembled with his balloon in the nres.
ence Of all the lords and courtiers Of
Portugal. What do you clean your
eyeglasses for professor? They are
also an Invention of the black devils
and We're invented In the thirteenth
century by the Dominican Alexander
spina. Are you in a hurry, that Won
look at your watch? You shouldn't do
that, because it is an invention of the
priests. The first clock Is from the
ecclesiastical writer Cassiodorus (,o,,
out his invention was improved upon
by Sylvester H., whom 1 mentioned
before. The first astronomical clock
was made by the Abbot wallingford in
1915. Now I'll go. I see you're hot,
professor. and the gas lights down.
town are turned on. Oh, yes, profess
sor, almost forgot to tell you that the
Jesuits invented the gas light, the
Jesutts this 'natio lucifuga.' Without
any doubt the Iesuits invented and
introduced 1t in 1894 at stonyhurst
England. and the Jesuit Dunn estah-
nshed the first gas company in 1915
IN Preston. Now, goodby, professor.
Kindly excuse. Oh. see you BOUGHT
a new bicycle? BY the way, the first
bicycle was built by the priest Phantom
IN 1s45. Good night, professor"
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