Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1912-06-25

Wofoo-Amortcan "oP0oheFISmSs
"spoouerisms" is a recognized and
accepted word used in the best circles
of English society, even though 1t has
not yet found its way into the die.
tionaries. Derived from the last name
of the Rev. William A. Spooner, ward
en- Of New college, Oxford, 1t charac-
terizes a curious sort Of blunder that
Is habitual with that mantle uncon'
scious interchanging Of the first letters
or syllables Of words with what are
often directly humorous results.
The most famous Of all the stories
about him tells how he once Numbered
out from the pulpit, Jehovah was not
on the side Of the kinkering congs,'
meaning, of course, "conquering kings
At anothes time he convulsed his au-
dience by boldly stating that he held
concealed half wormed fish (half
formed wish) in his bosom.
At university dinner given at the
time of Queen Victoria's diamond jubi-
lee he proposed, Three cheers for the
queer old dean," and they were given
with will, in honor not only OF the
dear old queer whom he had wished
to remember, but Of the queer OLD
dean who had forgotten himself.
Exasperated by would be humor1st
among his pupils. he informed him
that he had "weeble fit," not mean
ing any new disease, but the old, old
complaint Of a feeble wit.
To another who had been mainly &C.
cupied in wasting two terms at college
he complained, you have been incor-
rightly lazy and, to top 1t all, you have
tasted two worms"
In quoting the familiar text, BOW
not thy knee to an idol" he made 1t.
"Bow not thine eye to needle"
One day he discovered a stranger SIT
ting in his family pew. Madam"
whispered he, do you intend to occu'
pew this pie?"
Also he could blunder as blithesomc-
Iy In action as in speech. One windy
day. as he was walking down High
street in Oxford, his hat blew Off. He
stopped to pick 1t up, but at that very
moment a hen hurried by. He set on
in full pursuit and never stopped until
he had caught hold of the luckless hen
on Magdalen bridge. Then and there
he solemnly tried to put the bird on
his head.
Such are a few Of the blunders in
word and deed that have been attrib-
uted to the dear old dean" Must We
accept them all as genuine? Not If we
are to believe a contributor to NJ. A.
P. who informed that paper that ut a
church congress well known delegate
said to him:
"Have you ever noticed how spooner'
isms have died out since Canon Liddon
is no more? I will tell you how 1t ID.
Liddon and used to make them up.
One of our best, which is always at
tributed to Spooner, is From Iceland
Greasy Mountains
SpoOnerisms at all events existed be-
fore Spooner himself was born. Some
meritorious ones may be found In
Moore's Diary. There Is the story, Tor
example, of an old actor named Parker
who used always to say the "coisoneo
pup" instead Of the poisoned cup" One
night when he spoke 1t right the au'
dience said mo, no" and called for
the other reading. Another actor men
toned In Moore made great hit with
the Interpretations:
How sharper than serpents thanks II 10
To have a toothless child.
John Kemble was one night perform
ing favorite part In country theatel
when he was interrupted from time to
time by the squalling Of a child IN the
gallery. At length, angered by this
rival performance, Kemble walked
with solemn step to the front Of the
stage and, addressing the audience In
his most tragic tones, said, Ladies and
gentlemen, unless the play is stopped
the child cannot possibly 90 on"
America itself is not without its
Spooners and It's consequent spooner
isms. There must have been Mt least
three Spooners in the western court
where the following scene Is said to
have taken place:
"How far is It between these two
townsl" asked the lawyer.
about four miles as the flow cries,
replied the witness.
You mean as the cry flows"
NO" put in the judge; "he means
as the fly crows
And then they all looked at one an
other, feeling that something was
wrong.
A sort of conscious spOonerism was
that brilliant jest credited to Dean
Briggs of Harvard. During the year
when the slogan ITO hell with Yale!
first became popular among Cam
bridge undergraduates the dean, In
company with DR.. Edward Everett
Hale, was hurrying on his way to a
great football game between Yale ant
Harvard.
where are you going?" asked an
other member Of the faculty.
ITO yell with Hale" answered DR.
Briggs.-BOston Post.