davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
says UNCLE CAV

Society is rapidly following the ex
ample of the grease joints" proprie.
tor and the good folk of Puckyhuddle
1t has banished the ''Iadies and gents
sign. Nowadays you can eat in res.
taurant without being a gent" or e
lady, and manly man finds even the
devotees. of Baal ready to open theil
arms to him if he makes good, regard
less of the much abused prefix thai
was formerly required We are gen.
orally getting to the point where we
understand that gentleman" never
meant exactly what we thought il
meant and a great many of us would
be mad as hops if we ever caught its
full significance.
We have tried to improve the term
by broadening it's meaning to take in
pretty nearly everything out of Jail
and few that languish in durance
vile, but We've had to give 1t up as a
bad job. There is a gradually increas-
ing tendency to put the emphasis upon
man" and let it go at that.
There was once an inconsequential
foreigner who made sneering remark
concerning America, which gave OPP
portunity for retort that told a world
of truth.
But you have no ladies and gentle
men in America" he told the enthusi-
aStic tourist.
mo, but you ought to see the crop
of men and women we produce" was
the reply.
Back in Puckyhuddle, we had a
plain, unvarnished prejudice against
gentlemen" Our observation of
those who claimed the title was that
they did many things that an ordi-
nary, tolerably refined and altogether
manly man wouldn't be guilty of.
Moreover, taking the word of gentle
men for it, they toiled not, neither did
they spin, and you had to loosen up
your muscles or the kinks in your
that primitive community. Some of
the most cynical of our number quot
ed with a good deal of gusto the die
tu1n of the satirical physician that it
takes three generations to make a
gentleman, and when you've made
him, he's a degenerate. The good doc
tor probably meant that any one who
feels himself above common, everyday
usefulness, is degenerate, and, if so,
he was quite correct
Socially speaking, a gentleman is a
useless and costly luxury. He usually
exists upon the efforts of someone
who isn't in his class. He makes his
own class distinctions and it is unfair
for any of the rest of US to treSpaSS
upon the sacred precincts. Since he
insists that no gentleman can be lin
trade and that professional activities
put one without the pale of his realm
of gilded idleneSs, we should be con-
tent so long as none assumes to COM
pliment us by tagging us with his class
label. AS for himself, we should have
no objection to his amusing himself as
best he may, until the day when the
social reformers put him to work.
Meanwhile, it is perhaps not too much
to ask that he refrain from claiming
exclusively for his class the virtues of
refinement and general excellence
which he so often boasts and so sell
dom practices.
In America, he is very lonely. The
demand of the times is for something
more than a gent" The call is for
men.-(Copyright 1912, Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

From the Chicago News.J
Kisses sometimes speak louder than
words.
Be sure she is the right girl, then lose
your head.
Many a girls ideal Is shattered when
he goes broke.
Every silver lining has it's dark cloud,
says a pessimist.
It's easier to pose as promising youns
man than a paying one
And many a third class politician is
drawing a first class salary.
When a man agrees with you at all
times look for the AK he has to grind.
Forgive your enemies; if you have no
enemies forgive some of your friends
The average man nearly always man
ages to get caught in the act when he
has occasion to perform a charitable
deed.
Nothing is calculated to worry a man
more than to have his wife inform him
that he has been talking in his SLEEP and
then refuses to tell him what he saia.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
HUAOR or THE Day

Johnny, what are you doing?' ''Tryin'
to learn the fish in this here crtck what
they'll git if they bite on Sunday. '-Hous-
ton Post.
wise-This Is certainly a good cigar
you've given me, old chap. Guy-Shucksl
1 bet I've gone and given you the wrong
one.-Judge-
At don't like Maud's voice Her notes
come from the chest" well. ought thoy
not?" mo, they ought to stay there
Boston Transcript.
"Pa, will you tell me one thing about
profane history2' What is that, my
SOM" at is what you call a cursory
study ?'-Baltimore American.
Sam, have you got a job nowT' oh,
yes, sab" What are you doing, Sam2"
why. rs getting my wife washin', boss
-Yonkers Statesman.
PIunx-Dr. Pilldix told me he just got
me in time. Hazzard-He did. If he
didn't get you he'd have to get along
w4Ch his old auto another year.-Ncw
York Globe.
do you believe that all men are Great
ed equaI?" 81 used to before was mar
ried.'' And now?" Now I find that L
can't begin to compare with other wo-,
mems Observation-Disclosures Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
GLOBE SIGHTS
To get away with 1aziness admit IT.
BY THE ATcHIsoN GLOBE.

To get away with laziness admit it.
People apt to associate Ioafing with
luxury.
Your wit isn't particularly funny if you
have to do the laughing at it.
AS a rule, the man who goes away from
home for a rest, doesn't get it,
1t is more than probable that people ex-
pect too much of their friends.
Doc Robinson, in his history: Every
town has several men who rush around
like widfire, but never get anywhere.
A young doctor doesn't want to be
called DOC" but by the time he has es-
tablished a practice proportionate to his
dignity, he gets used to it.
Sensible post card philosophy: If you
know of thing that will darken the joy
of man. woman. boy or girl it is a
pretty good plan to forget it.
Another person who should be trampled
underfoot is the man who wants to know
why you weren't at church the Sunday
before. What's 1t to him?
Mrs. Link Preston, who expects to
make a visit to Kansas City next sum-
II IT, is hoping Santa Claus will give her
a years subscription to a travel maya
zine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Generous, indeed, is the offer of
Topeka to establish a White Way
around the state house square if the
state will pay it's share of the cost for
the paving that was done around this
same square some 25 years ago. With
such an illumination, Kansas would
have a state house grounds that would
be distinctive among the similar pos
sessions of other states. 1t would at
tract the favorable attention of all the
visitors at the capital city. and they
come from the four ends of the earth.
Another feather worth while would
thereby be placed in the cap of
Kansas.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Bunch of New York sutfragettes
started to walk to Albany, but. by The
second day, and less tnan 16 mles
from w ali street, ali but two OF them
hao DECIDED that Albany was a mighty
poor pace TO visit anyway
The moral seems to be that the
pilgrim chorus will not become pop
ular as Sunragette anthem
A South Dakota youth was roped
and draggeu to death, presumably ny
a rlvaI IN the pursuit OF some country
girl some Class 10 a stunt IKE that
IL the rope mad been in general use
during the feudal perlod, Dir w dteA
Scott would have maue less use OF tne
word sword The advantage OF \tne
rope over the sword or other hoInlcl-
daI Instrument was brought forth IN
Yankee in King Arthurs court, ny
Mark Twain. Inc rope is one OIL Tie
greatest contrivances ever invented ny
the human race. 1t is apphcaole "
either war Or peace. In peace, II may
he used to elevate the old oaken bucket
from the well. in war it is usetuI-as
demonstrated by the South Dakota
youth, and as an arbitrator Wnen ap-
piled in a two-foot length, Will a KNOT
in the end of it, it beats chuhk u
gas pipe for settling arguments oe
tween father and son.
Hon Tom Mason, editor of Life"
has invited this department to seno
him some copy. He intinlates that ne
does not always turn down copy JUST
because it is rotten. Possibly non
Mason holds in reserve some otner
vital excuse for turning down anything
we might contribute.
AL Kubiak,-(sounds like a push
cart licensee), trimmed Carl Morris at
Atlanta. 1t has been our coptentlon
for some time that a mixture OF garnc
and cheese would result il: disaster for
the cheese.
1t has been reported that Dave Leahy
is slated for a job as United States
deputy marshal We would make
strenuous objection to having Dave
tossed out of a job, but, in the inter
ests of public welfare, object to the
appointment as marshal. P. o. ROBBERS
and bank crackers would fall over
themselves in an effort to become
pinched by the genial Dave. All who
know him would rather be arrested by
him than to spend money
Kansas City papers are using the
story of the deaf-mute who killed his
deaf-mute wife. They admit that it
was a quiet affair, but neglect to add
that he stole silently away.
Under the present system of num-
bering shoes, by a code sign known
only to the clerks, it is easier to salts
fly female customers. AS it stands, the
woman who asks for num-
Der threes, gets fit without throwing
one.
Mr.. Wilson says that since he fore
sock college work to enter the execu-
tive line, he has found an Increased
to profanity" But politics
will rot make him a finished cusser. /
He should take a post graduate course
in newspaper work.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Words of praise are cheap enough
to be passed around little more
frG ely.
ANY sort of a girl with money is
exceedingly interesting to one variety
of men.
Perhaps vice is increasing because it
gets so much more advertising than
virtue.
Nor is it possible to convince the
school boy that he's enjoying the
halcyon days of his life.
There is no such condition as a
man having everything he wants. No
matter what or how much he has, he
always wants more.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
THE REASON.

Inc hats appeared a year ago
with nothing but a feather,
mat looked as though it had been through
month of rainy weather;
narrow quill. OF seanty bow,
Or wing erect and lonely,
Or solitary tall aigrette,
Or fluffy pompon only.
BUT now on every female head
Behold the autumn bonnet
or many shapes, but each without
scrap of trimming on 1t.
or since the price of beef has scared
TO heights Olympus dimming,
We may afford to buy the hats
But not, alas! the trimming.
Baltimore American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

A few women on the Kansas City,
Mo, police force would seem to be
desirable. One of the fair sex of that
town cave chase to a thief the other
day and actually caught him. Such
activities are exceedingly rare in the
annals of the Kansas City police force.
Nor is this a situation that is unusual
to the city at the mouth of the Kaw
It prevails in most of the other cities
Ct the country
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Topeka's police point out that when
they get their automobile, the pur-
chase of which has been authorized
by Mayor Billiard. a burglar or any
other variety of criminal won't have
more than a fifteen minutes start on
them no matter in what section of the
city he operates. But inasmuch as
1.any of the modern burglars and
crooks use automobiles, such a start
ought to be amply sufficient for them
to make a getaway.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Eggs have dropped in price in some
of the big cities to "a and % cents a
dozen. But they're of the cold storage
variety. Real eggs, fresh. from the
farm, can be purchased in Topeka for
% cents a dozen. As far as COM
narrative values Ire concerned, a fresh
egg is worth two or three times as
much as a cold storage egg. Many
Topekans are wont to protest about
the prices they have to pay for food
stuffs, but in this line they can get
the choicest of almost the home grown
variety for prices that are on a level
or only a trif1e higher than those
charged in the larger cities for the
same things Of most inferior grades.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Advertisements of fake fire, bank
ruptcy, receivership or other sales
have been placed under the ban in
Seattle through the medium of city
ordinance. And if such legislation is
all that is needed to cope with this
evil, it should be enacted in every city
in the country. State legislation along
this line might also help some. Fake"
advertising is little less than criminal,
and it should be handled accordingly.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
DAFFYDHS
By q. NOALL.-

How can a man be an uncle if he's
a merchant?
(Show him no mercy He's the
boob that put the pill in spilL)
If a burglar got in cellar would
the coal-shute?
(No more hot tamales, thank YOU'D
If Virginia saw much fighting in the
big war what was it that Arkansas?
(Now don't you dare quote me.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Most of the school boys the country
over will wag their heads and wink
slyIy at the announcement that
Charlie Taft, one of the presidents
sons, won the highest honors in his
cla-s at the private school conducted
Nv his uncle. -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

William Randolph Hearst is evil
IDENTIFY one of those remarkable men
who doesn't let his left hand know
what his right hand is doing. He
knows from whom he received the
fac-similes of the famous Archbold
letters, but he doesn't know whether
anyone associated with him in the
publishing business paid for those
letters or not.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
from OTHER PENS
MORE TARIFF FOLLY TALK

10y
Either the Washington correspondents
are afflicted with remarkable poverty of
imagination or the Democratic tariff
policy is to be marked by sheer faulty.
The dispatches are telling that it is the
program to put up to President Wilson
next year the bills President Taft vetoed
which is precisely what the correspon-
dents reported some time ago. In view
of the renewed reports it becomes neces-
sary to say again that If the Democrats
pass the tariff bills vetoed this last year
they will stultify themselves by the action.
The bills that were sent to President Taft
were not Democratic bills but haphazard
compromises that grew out OF the necessi-
ties of the parliamentary situation. They
did not represent Democratic or Pro-
gressive principles They were patched
up in conference until they were brought
into shape that suited neither faction
but that represented the minimum of OBJ
jectons on both sides. They were not
fish or flesh. They were based on neither
investigation nor scientific reasoning.
They were mere chance work. The wool
schedule, for instance was fixed by the
Democrats at 20 per cent for the leading
classification, and the item will do for
Illustration. The Democratic house pass
ed the bill with this figure which the
report of the ways and means committee
had approved as the proper level for the
duty. The senate changed the figure to
40 per cent by means of a Democratic
Progressive combination ana the confer
ence committee shifted about until it
reached a % per cent basis. This was the
basis in the bill taht was vetoed. Is 1t to
be the basis in the bill that will now be
passed? If the Democrats should carry
out the policy suggested by the corre-
spondents there may be a childish sort of
satisfaction for them in showing their
power to put through what a Republican
president had blocked but it will be an
expensive sort of satisfaction I'm the end.
1t will mean the enactment into law of
the strangest medley of happenchance
tariff schedules ever adopted by any coun-
try, and it is certain to be resented by
the business community in terms that
viii lbe unmiStaka ble.-Detrott Free Press.
CASTRO ONCE MORE.
Cypriano Castro. that chronic political
nuisance of Venezuela, is again manifest
ing symptoms of uneasiness, and the
country which fondly believed that it was
rid of him for good has occasion to 40
some thinking. Castro has left the Ca
nary Islands, where he has been making
his home, for England. The natural con-
clusion is that he plans to turn UP in
Central America at what seems to han
to b. the psychological moment and be-
gin mischief making. This political irr'-
tant should not be permitted to land on
American SOIL If he is not content to
enjoy liberty abroad, then some asylum
should be found in which to incareerate
him. He is political lunatic and danger
Gus to not only Central but all-Amertcan
peace.-Schenectady Union-Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
rFrom the New York Press.I

TFrom the New York Press.1
Soon engaged, sooner Tilted
The reason Santa Claus is so generous
is he can charge everything.
fathers idea of being firm with the
children is being cross with their mother
about it
Nothing can be in such poor style of d
shoe to a girl as one with an honest num-
Der on it,
girl learns by experience with heI
brothers what a poor thing a man IL, 30
she never suspects her beau
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Another excuse for a social survey
of Topeka may possibly be that 1t Is
something of a fad these days Most
of the large and vexing social prob
lens in the cosmopolitan and metro
politan centers are as foreign to To-
peka as wool is to a goat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The state journal q q member Of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
eelegrnph report of that great news or
gmnisAtlon for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka
The news Is received In The state Jour
nal bufIdinx over wires tor this sole puE-
0ose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Why doesn't one of those New York
suffragettes, who are walking to Al
bany, ride a white horse? Then the
affair would be a trif1e more remlnls-
cent of the parade of CoXey's army.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

At any rate, the Kansas aviator who
lost his life in the Pacific ocean picked
out a much softer spot on which to fall
than dry LAM is.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Neither does the war game appear
to be exceedingly popular with the
able-bodied men in these United
States The navy is about six thousand
men short of it's authorized strength.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Certain Chicago girls seem bent on
becoming old maids. They have pand-
ed together in a club with pleuSe
not to marry young men whose IN
comes are not at least 5000 a year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

One trouble with the good little boy
these days is that he is almost too
good to be true.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

Maria Peacock, of the Leavenworth
Times, suspects that much of the
knocking and scandal-mongering could
be cured by digestive tablets.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

aRYAN.

BRYAN.
The future of Bryan is the theme OF
much speculation. The reactionaries OF
the country, the champions of special
privileges and the gamblers of Wall
street are very much afraid that he
will be invited into President wilson's
cabinet. AS the president-elect has evil
IDENTIFY taken no person in his confi-
dence, and his cabinet selections are
wholly speculative, the shadow of Bryan
is exceedingly disconcerting to old
time enemies of the fearless Nebraskan-
Thousands of letters have been written
to Governor Wilson protesting against
his appointment. While his enemies
have been busy, his friends have been
no less SO. Word comes FROM Bermuda
that for one letter advising the new
president to ignore Bryan in the selec-
ton of his official family four letters
have been received urging his appoint
ment. Unquestionab1y Mr.. Bryan is the
most popular citizen in the United
states today. During the last sixteen
years ne has grown steadily in the love,
confidence and esteem of his fellow
countrymen. No individual realizes this
1act more strongly han woodrow VIII
son. We do not believe that Mr.. Bryan
is candidate for any office within
the gift of the new administration, al
though no single individual in the en-
tire country is more entitled to recog-
milton than he. When Mr.. Wilson gets
judging from his past character and his
record as governor of New Jersey, he
will select his official family wholly in
the interests Of the public service, Mr..
Bryan will be named providing he be-
ieves 1t his duty to ally himself ac-
lively with the administration A cabi-
net portfolio will not increase his pop
ularity or his usefulness. He has
nothing to gain personally from such
an appointment. But If too bitter a
fight is made against him by his old
time enemies, and he believes that he
can render distinct lervice to his
country, in that capacity, we believe
that he will accept. Furthermore Gov
ernor Wilson could not possibly make
a more popular appointment, or one
that would Re more universally en-
dorsed by the country at large than
the selection of Americas greatest citi-
zen as the premier of his administra-
tion.-Hutchinson Gazette
y PROBABILITY
Now that the women have equal SUI
rage they can be drawn for Jury serv-
ice-and lot of other things they prob
ably did not think about The first
time some frisky justice of the peace
issues summons for some good home
loving housewife to serve on a fury, to
determine the ownership of a two-dol-
lar calf or an asthmatic pig and the
constable goes for said h. W., finds her
putting out the family wash and orders
her to come to court, our private opin-
ion is that said Justice will get some
thing from a woman's tongue he will
not soon forget.-Conway Springs Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19
BY The WAY
By HARVEY PARSONS.

Bunch of New York sufragettes
started to walk to Albany, but, by The
second day, and less tnan 16 mlles
from W ali street, ali but two of them
hao declded that Albany was a mighty
poor pace TO visit anyway
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-19

The moral seems to be that the
pilgrim chorus will not become pop
uiar as a Sunragette anthem.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1912-03-08
Pound Party at Bark Hill.

A pound party was given at the
home Of Mrs. Laura Smith, at Bark
Hill, Oh Tuesday evening, February
~, in honor OF Mrs. Smith. Games
and social chat were INDUCED in I'M
til a late hour, when refreshments
were served in abundance, after which
ali departed for their homes in the
wee sma' hours OF the morning
Those present were: Mesdames-
Laura Smith, C. Nusbaum, Charles
Wilson; Misses-Hilda Yingling, Edna
Ham, Edna Wilson, Verna Wilson,
Pauline Ham, Mamie Weller, Nettie
Fleagle, Florence Harris, Minnie
Smith; Messrs.-Arnel Parrey, John
Utermahlen, Howard Markle, William
Catzendafner, Harry Marquet, Harry
Routzahn, Leonard Fohrman, Joe
Wilson, Carroll Warren, Glennie
Grouse, Ralph Starner, VIM. Fleagle,
Charles RoutZahn, VIM. Nusbaum, Ell
mer Wilson, Edward Stultz, Scott
Slonaker, Grover Little, Lester Nus
maum and others.