Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1912-02-06
HOMRMAKERS COLUMN.
on topics Of inssrest Q the adie.
CoLUnN, Oxford Democrat. South Paris. As-
What do you Talk About at tn
Taf1N2


What do you Talk About 1t the
Table7
Some people don't talk ct the table at
oil. They consider meals the time lot
eating and regard social converse -
super fiuous and out OF place.
Cant you wait to talk until Ne have
done ea,insp" asked . German Hsusfrau
sh.rply OF . compile Of American girls
who were boarding with her To Dresden.
ave como to the table for f0Od-nOt for
conversation" (Gobbling, not cabling"
was tho American young womsn's trans
lation.)
Not all Of the nontalkers put II 20
badly, but plenty Of them have tho air o.
resenting an interruption OF the serious
business Of "stokine" BY trivial chat.
We find them irritating yet am not
sure but that they shine BY comparison
With those who choose the table ~ the
occasion for airing their grievances, their
maladies, their bad tempers. One fam
ily I know selects the breakfast table a.
the time and the place for Ito hercest
arguments and most poignant com.
plants. Criticisms Of tho food and
service, invectives against business con-
tretemps. vehement discussion OF poIit',
cal or ecclesiastical situations oil 6ud
their opportunity in that trying period
of man's-aDd Observation-Disclosures
first meal of the day
To be distasteful, table talk need not
Of necessity be quarrelsome. Some OF
the most amiable people I ever encoun-
tered were my table mates at country
boarding house one summer when they
came near driving those about them into
chronic dyspepsia and fixed depression
by their remarks on tho effect the food
offered them would probably have upon
their internal organizations. At first 1t
was de sppetizing, then 1t became almost
funny, but It never ceased to DO trying.
MOI at q boarding. house but 10 tho
home Of friend was my dinner enliven-
ed one day by . vivid description OF IN
accident. No details Of gore or anguish
were spared and WAS not astonished
when q guest near me begged to be ex.
cused from tho table and left the room
with faltering step and . white face.
An effort was required on my part to re-
frain from following her. A similar 10.
cident occurred In my presence 1t IN.
other time when . lively boy gave the
particulars OF battle royal he had had
with an adder, which had ended BY bis
killing the snake with stone.
"But don't mind talking about those
things when l am at the table," some
one may say. Perhaps You don't, but
believe me, there are many who dol l
number among my memories that OF the
dear man whom no one would ever have
accused of affectation or lack OF manli.
ness, who used to plead, Cant We post
pone the discussion of this subject until
we have finished esting?" when topics
we're introduced relating to gruesOme
details of illness, accident, operations,
battle, murder or sudden death.
A comparison OF experience and
observations might be interesting and
instructive. When you are at table do
you avoid or encourage topics that are
likely to provoke heated argument and
uncomfortable feelingp Do you abstain
from criticism and fault finding at tho
periods when composure should be cult
waited a. an aid to digestion? Do sou try
to keep unsavory subjects and uuappe-
| tizing items ont OF the conversation or
do you plunge recklessly In, confident Of
your own strength OF digestion? What
do you talk about at the table?
Does Ii seem that 40 vigorous censor.
ship of themes might narrow the field OF
conversation? Not at all, and the bust.
ness OF promoting cheerful chat upon
interesting and agreeable topics 10 the
duty of every dweller in family.
Rightly viewed the table 10 ono Of the
plsasantest gathering places Of clan.
The scott or the jeer which may meet
this statement 10 testimony to how far
the family board in most households has
sunk below its proper standard.
I'VE miss dear Dad most at meal
times" woman said to me not long
after her fathers death. I'VE always
used to be 80 merry then! 1t WAS tho
time 10 the day when We could be TO-.
gether and chat without hurry and be
was SO genial, so full of interest In oil
that We did that We saved our best
stories to tell him then, and talked over
all the things that meant most to 10.
Our family meals were about the pleas
ATTEST things that happened to us!'
This Is as II should be, and also ~ Il
might be in any homo worthy Of the
name. What domestic table talk shall
be lies In tho hands Of oil, but preemi-
uently In those Of the heads Of the
house. II they guide the talk In the
right direction, II they discourage
promptly and firmly any inclination to
wrangling or pickering, II they direct
tho discussion from topics that may lead
to hard feeling or to disgust, they can
shape conversational family habits along
the best lines.
No time 10 too soon to begin. The
young couple who 20 to housekeeping
may start as they mean to 20 on and
when tho children reach tho age when
they may be allowed part In tho chat,
their tendency will be what the father
and mother have made it-just - these
brought from their own homes tho Gus.
toms practiced there. There are virtu.
GUS a. we'll ~ vicions circles IN events.
The educational value OF table talk can
hardly be overrated, - those know who
have been blessed by living 10 cultured
families where the conferences ut meals
are OF matters worth while. Bear this 10
mind, you parents who are likely to let
your own fatigue lead you TO silence al
tahle-or In iPrita hilitv and petulanc0 -