davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Different.

whats the matter with your"
I'm mad clear through. happened
to be crossing the street and an auto
mobile threw mud all over me-"
well, look here. Your automobile
threw mud all over me yesterday"
That's different. You're a pedes-
trian. You ought to know enough to
get out of tho way"
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
A kind-Hearted Man.

"Mr. Wombat!"
Yes; what Ia it?"
Couple of suffragettes out here
throwing stones at your window"
bawled the policeman.
How long have they been doing
that
"Oh. several hours"
Let 'em alone. 1t amuses the girls
and don't believe they'll hit the win
dow"
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04

spin down lilac-scented boulevards
through the parks.
Something drops kerplunk on the
Counterpart. and I know it is a large
fat spider. There Is a mouse gnawing
busfy somewhere In the room. Then
pull the sheet up over my head and
nervously shudder myself to sleep!
This is the real truth about the
way in which you start OF summer re-
sorting."-Chicago Daily News.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Anxious Tenant.

Madame-This fiat would suit us
very well but for this room, which 10
SO small.
Concierge-It would do for one
child, madame.
Madame-It isn't q question of .
child, but of my hat boxes.-Pele Mele.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Catching.

Aunt Jane-Why, where's Willisf
Willie's Ma-He's down in the
marsh catching flies.
Aunt Jane-And where's his fatherf
Down in the marsh catching fish,"
"And where's Willie's sister,"
"She's down in the marsh catching
cold"
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04

The Chimpanzee-Do you believe in
the theory Of evolution?
The Gorilla-Oh, implicitly. At least
I think there is no doubt that We are
descended from human beings.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
RIoht WAY to Proceed.

''If you take each job as you come
o it. opportunity will be chasing after
ECU instead of you chasing after OPP
-Itunity. James. Univer
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Too Much.

Too Much.
why did you give your parrot
away? The poor bird meant nothing
by its profanity"
II could stand its profanity, but It
was learning to initiate my neighbor's
rusty lawn mower"
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04

Bess- How do you eliminate the
scent o. onions?
Tess-Oh, the remedy's simple. !,
read a story that takes my breatl
away.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Vice Versa.

Does the hero marry the heroin
at The end of all of their troubles?"
mo; at the beginning" -Judge.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Gloomy.

The wight who's subject to the ''blues."
Meier pictures life in gorgeous hues.
Instead o. that, with doleful signs
He contemplates the cloudless skies.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
compuIsIon.

compulsIon.
Compulsion is the weapon Of the
weak.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Those Girls.

Bella-He said he would kiss me OF
die in the attempt.
Della-Well?
Rella-He has no life insurance. and
pttted his poor old mother.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Another Matter.

According to this newspaper, man
has gotten a divorce from his spirit
vie"
"Oh. bosi. There's no such thing
s spi. it wife
Wait bit. I was mistaken The
jective is 'spirituous.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Natural Conclusions.

There goes a man who has three
wives living" said some one to Broth
er Williams.
MY! My," exclaimed the old man.
'Wuz he BON crazy or lost his mind
CROWN up?"
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Weary in Well.Doing.

You can't sit up with my daughtc
after II o'clock"
Would you mind telling her that
sir? l have been trying to get HON,
early for six months. Life.
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
Affected.

Affected.
Nong poets. It sesuaS
That a popular pose
Il looking for dreams
In the heart Of . rose
The Lamar register. [volume] (Lamar, Colo.) 1889-1952, 1912-12-04
COOVER THE TAILOR
los ~ South Main St.
. LAMAR COLORADO Lii FIT

Dear Sir
This is a letter of warning
There really
will heed bmy warning clothes made the
coming holidays. until
deliver during
the holiday Then liable to delay the
until cold weather Inconvenience
will give attention
first fitting time. will call
There real wooden values hand
able which
as rs and
will make
trust will heed this
place order within
respectfully,
COOVER THE TAILOR
call, a postcard
IN AM
The Sentinel=record., 1912-12-17
ARKANSAS

3240 acres of the best hardwood in the State of This lies Ashley County Ark between two railroads being the main line of the Iron Mountain The report this will S9O000O feet of white oak 740O0O oa 55O0000 feet of ash hickory and e 100000 gum After the land is cleared will be worth easily $15 per adjoining land now Tn cultivation in from $5 $60 The trees are free from doubt this the best unsod small bodies of hardwood timber The offered considerably money 90 all cash than they are now ask
 property. As timber proposition cannot pc coaed The price on same $225O per If interested will furnish plats and cruisers report
 41eo acres of land in Chicot County with railroad right through the lies in the famous Chot bottoms overflow with the exception of this last year, however the benefited by the water The Iron Mountain Railroad line running right through the center of same just three miles from Monrose, Ark the main ine and miles Village the County seat There is bayou running through the property which drains from all directions Adjacent lands selling from $20 to S25 and i'm proved selling from $50 $75 per Land in this section will raise from bale half of cotton to the and from 50 5 bushels This land has enough timber left pay it will from $500 to 4000 feet of merchanabe timber Bodies of this kind getting and this the few left One report which posed be adverse quoted this body follows This land needs drainage however taken whole would the land good fair low land" The price asked consii erab above what sold for number of The tim Der is not thick other bodies and at $6O0 cannot recommend it. but will state that it above the average the County This report knock but read between the lines nlmSef lat It IS gain will sell this land for $600 per terms of third cash balance three equal payments If interested will send pas.
 18O0O colonization land Grant County just fifty miles from Hot Springs This land is over but whole is of the best unsod bodies in the State The railroad within two miles of andtee good roads all through the erty The Hurricane right through it. about f teen miles from the Arkansas River above overflow The land S
 fine oam and not like the thin pine lands that have been sold this section This land real producer and have testimonials from parties who have bought small farms paying S250 Sl5 per acre. which state that they raised this year from bale
 bale and quarter of cotton the fy corn We would be pleased show this land any interested parties The banks loaned the per same Price asked $500 per acre.
 600 acre improved farm in Woodruff County Just one and half miles from the city of Augusta Has gooU five room res dehc on It, also three tenant houses hundred acres Tn nigh state of cultivation 300 in meadow and pas ure the balance in wood Has fine wells on the place and
 ode 1ar The owner desirous of selling as he needs some
 money and has made the exceptionally low price of S1O per acre o @ooVo sold before January 919 will take one-haf
 s the balance Tn equal payments per interest fhis e agcultura country and place like cannot be bought Tor double the money around Augusta
The Sentinel=record., 1912-12-17
GARLAND COUNTY

acres miles the city, will be within 12 Memphis Dallas Gulf Railroad Has spring it flowing gallons day Never failing creek through property, ideal and stock raising property This fine of land. Price $850 per
 acres, miles the city, and just miles proposed railroad good road Church and school the property. Price $65O per
 Sixty four miles from the city the Thornton Ferry Road of which forty cultivation one house and veroom house. with large practically new; chicken houses all necessary oubudings crib has about 500 bushels of bundles Ger The place has hundred bearing fruit This of the best small places close Hot Springs produce good The leave and has offered the place for less than Price 85OO on which reasonable terms can be arranged.
 Forty acres the Thornton Ferry road just three miles from the city, of which twenty is in cuvaon in fruit trees Has fine we'll of house. This is fine proposition truck farm and chicken ranch The right man make good living and lay Ing fund for rainy day. Price $2,00
 Fifty the Mountain Valley Road just three miles from the city Of this fifteen in cuvation ten in pasture The place posts and hog tight wire fence There vineyard plants and seventy fruit trees. Has good we'll of water stone walls Has good six room house with bath fully equipped smoke house. wood and implement house, story half barn 2Ox40 feet Has telephone to the house city connection Is on the new right of way of the Little Rock and Hot Springs place mas been held another larger place and anxious sell and for one week has placed the price at $220O Will pleased to show to any one interested It will make fine country home
 twenty-five acres all in cultivation just two % rom the city on the Pleasant Valley ideal dairy ar for which now being used Has good our-room house and large dairy barn This of the little country places on this road and close to the city The wants to sell if at al and will make the price S2750 with terms ) suit the purchaser. Don't let this get away from you
 1l0O0 acres timber and F miles north of Hot Springs
 This land will cut from 4500 to 5000 feet pro- posed line of L. R. H. nterurban railroad Sxtyfve per cent of land adaptable to farms plenty good water and as cut over land should sell for from $500 $50 per acre Price SLIGO per acre. bargain investment
 rory acres Just across from the Golf Links which twenty Ve acres are n cultivation This property fine orchard on same Two small houses good barn. Property all around it has been selling for $00 25 owner needs mon y ana mas made special price This property has been held at $45O0 Owing conditions sold at once We are author ed to make the price of $3000 This best piece of cos property around Hot Springs the Malvern road and will make an ideal spot for country home for the lovers golf
The Sentinel=record., 1912-12-17
HOT SPRINGS

Corner Hobson and Francis St.--A modern Groom denc five old in fine state of repair Has gas ecrcy sewer bath room barn. rustic porch all of the prettes little homes in the city, Owner left sold. Price $500
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
SALOONS MUST
EXPOSE ROOMS
Police to See that Bars are
Visible After Hours
One Violation.
ESPECIALLY ON SUNDAYS
Chief Burke Says Restaur-
ants and Bowling Alleys
Do Not Alter Cases.

The police have taken a firm stand
against the use of screens or curtains
TO obStruct \ view of the interior of
bar rooms IA, such times when they
hould be closed and exposed. They
declare some license holders think they
can draw their curtains and obstrnct
view of their bars from the street be-
cause they have a restaurant or bowl
ing alleys IN the place. Patrolman
Tonnesen informed William Pfirrman,
Of "a Smith street yesterday that he
would have to expose the interior of
his room regardless of the fact that he
conducted sort of restaurant in the
rear of the place The proprietor com
Piled at once with the order.
Chief of Police Burke said today he
wanted it plainly understood that while
saloonkeepers might have restaurants,
y,tasts~,,s ,tsts~,,,s counters, or bowling alleys in his
place did not exempt him from exposing
to view the interior of his bar room
during all closing hours. He said many
license holders were laboring under q
false impression in this respect. The
chief declared that in order to come un-
der the provisions of the law and
operate with closed bar rooms during
hours places should be closed, the Ii
cense must provide for selling malt
and spirituous liquors in a restaurant
etc - Under the law concerning the
sale of liquors, restaurant must be
operated on two or more floors.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
FLIGHT ACROSS
BAY THIS WEEK
Aviators at Soldiers Plan
Trip to Coney Island in
New Hydro-AeropIane.
GOOD WEATHER NEEDED
About 1000 People Visit
Station Yesterday Expecting
to See Machine Used.

About one thousand people from this
city, South Amboy, Keyport and sur
rounding territory visited Seidler s
Beach yesterday afternoon expecting to
see flight of the hydroaeroplane of R.
J. Collier. Walter Brookins and o. G.
Simmons, aviators, who are in charge of
the machine after a consultation yester-
day afternoon decided that the flight
would have to be postponed owing to
the wind. The machine was ready for
use late Saturday afternoon.
In addition to the house, dressing
room and hangers, track running into
the water has been constructed. The
machine rolls from its berth on plat
form to the water where it rises. Mr..
Simmons, who has used the machine in
Mexico and in the Philippines claims
that forty miles per hour can be made
without any difficulty.
Besides the aerial station at Seidler g
Mr.. Collier has an up-todate machine
shop In the rear of his residence at
Wickatunk, where it is claimed a ma
chine similar in type to the one to be
used by Mr.. Collier may be. constructed
If weather conditions permit a flight
will be made today. Mr.. Brookins in
tends to make flight daily. One of the
trips to be undertaken by the aviators
is flight from Seidler S to Coney Is
land and back.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
5000 GREET
THE PRESIDENT
Only Informal Reception Was
Held at Trenton.
CFrom the NEWS Correspondent


Trenton, April 29:-The recep-
ton to President Taft here Saturday
afternoon under the auspices of the
William H. Taft Association, par
took somewhat of non-partisan
character. For about an hour the
president stood in the auditorium of
the Republican Club and shook
hands with all comers. 1t Is esti-
mated that he greeted more than
5000 persons, including a liberal
sprinkling of women.
Former Governor E. G. Stokes,
one of the Roosevelt leaders of the
state, was one of those who met the
president and there were other
Roosevelt men in the crowd. Quite
a number of Democrats, too, passed
before President Taft and shook his
hand.
The president was not scheduled
to speak here and he only said a
few words at the close of the func-
ton, thanking the people for the
compliment paid him In the recep-
ton. A heavy downpOur of rain
failed to keep the crowds from turn
ing out to see President Taft, and
the greeting given him was enthu-
siastic.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
INSPECTOR is
BEING URGED
To Examine All Electrical
Work in City.

Boss electricians and other mem
bers of the Master Builders Asso-
ciation are boosting q movement to
have public inspector of electrical
work named. The idea IS to have a
man Inspect all kinds or wiring and
other kinds of electrical work IN
buildings to further guard against
fires. At present this work is done
to certain degree by the National
Board of Fire Underwriters. Ap-
pointment of a local inspector, it Is
declared, can be done under provi-
sions of a 1911 law and this would
modify work of the underwriters.
The subject has been broached to
Acting Mayor Garretson and other
members of the Board of Aldermen
who declare they favor such action.
1t is stated such duties could be
placed on City Electrician Jay B.
FRANKIE.
Accompanying the appointment of
such an inspector would necessarily
come passage of rules and regula-
tions, such as would probably com
pei certain kinds of tireproOf wiring
in buildings within the fire limits.
In that event wires would probably
have to be run in iron pipes or con-
duits and all electrical work would
have to be done in the best manner
possible to guard against fires.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
MIXED MORTAR
ON PAVEMENT
Alderman Has Man Arrested
--Recorder Reserves Decision

10 assist in bringing about the rigid
enforcement of an ordinance prohibiting
the mixing Of mortar and the like on
street pavements, Alderman +. A. Sea-
man had A. X. Jensen, contractor, and
Hans Everson, one Of his workmen, ar
raigned before Recorder Kehoe this
morning. The court held the accused
guilty of violation of the ordinance,
and reserved decision until an inspec-
tion could be made of the pavement in
question. -.
To Prevent Further Violations. -
Mr.. Seaman explained to the reeorde,
that it was time action was taken TO
rigidly enforce the ordinance because
a number of pavements had been dam
aged and others disfgured by mortar.
cemnet and the like. lie declared there
was an opportunity at hand to make
an example of those who violate proyis-
ions of the ordinance, stating that he
was not after Mr.. Jensen nor his work
men particularly, but Simply had the
case brought to the court 3 attention
that some steps might be taken to pre-.
vent further violations.
Mr.. Seaman said ho had visited the
spot in front Of 1Sl State street, where
Mr.. Everson had mixed mortar Satur-
day on the pavement without bed OF
sand or boards. He declared the mix
Ing was done on the surface of the
pavement.
Says He Cleaned It OFF.
Mr.. Everson stated he had cleaned
the pavement off and that it was as
clean now as it ever was. To that the
alderman replied it was not so much the
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
BILL VETOED
BY GOVERNOR
Would Have Saved Middle
sex $4,000 a Year in
Maintaining Co. Bridge.
REASONS NOT GIVEN
AssembIyman Ten Brock Re-
ceives Word --Supported
Measure Much Surprise.

Assemblyman John F. Ten Brock, of
this city, has received word from Secre-
tary of State David Crater that Cover
nor Woodrow Wilson has vetoed Senate
bill No. 355, which provided that the
State of New Jersey should assume one
third of the yearly cost of maintaining
the county bridge over the Raritan riv-
er, connecting this city and South Am
boy. If the measure had become law
it would have meant a saving of $4,000
year to Middlesex county, Mr.. Ten
Broeck states.
Reasons Not Learned.
The reasons for the Governors veto
could not be learned by Assemblyman
Ten Brock, who had been active in Sc
curing the passage of the bin in the
senate and assembly. The measure, as
originally introduced by Senator George
8. Silzer, of Middlesex, provided that
the state assume the entire cost of
maintaining all bridges in the state over
a certain number of feet in length, al
though applying only to the county
bridge In Middlesex. Other senators,
however, objected to the measure on the
grounds that it was too sweeping and
would place an unreasonable expense
upon the state. The bill was pigeon
holed in committe until the last day of
the session.
Assemblyman Is Puzzled.
Learning that the committee did not
intend to report the bill on the con
Guiding day, the Middlesex county as
sembIymen, Mr.. Ten Brock, August
Streitwolf of New Brunswick, and
John p. kirkpatrick, of Jamesburg,
waited upon the chairman of the com
mittee and were met with the stunning
announcement that "the bill was unin-
tentionally sent to my home in South
Jersey along with other valuable pa
pers.' The assemblymen Immediately
prepared another bin and tried to intro
duce it in the house, but were met with
poposition on the part of the Hudson
county delegation, which had been
turned down" only a few hours be-
fore in matter of pet legislation. The
new bridge bill was then taken to the
senate, whore it was introduced as No.
355 and passed without opposition. In
one hour after its introduction it had
passed the older body as well as the
House of Assembly, and was on its way
to Governor Wilson for his signature
Mr.. Ten Broeck can give no explanation
of the governor s veto.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
MAY PROHIBIT
TITANIC FILMS
Censor Board to Considered
barred in PhiIa.

1t appears likely that the Board
of Censors for motion pictures will
prohibit the exhibition IN this city
of moving pictures depicting the
sinking of the Titanic. Mayor
Blankenburg has forbidden exhibit
tion Of the pictures in Philadelphia,
stating: These pictures are all
fakes, in the first place. ! think 1t
is about the limit for proprietors of
moving picture houses to CONNER
cialize such terrible disaster" "
Authorities Of other cities are taking
similar action.
The matter has been called to the
attention of the acting mayor and
Chairman Walker of the Board of
Censors. The former said he under
stood pictures of that kind were to
be exhibited in a place In State
street which had been reported to
the censorship board as closed. The
latter will act on the subject.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
JACOB CANSS
IS INSTALLED
Pastor of St. Paurs Church
--lmpressive Ceremonies.

Rev. DR.. Jacob Ganss, who has
been acting pastor of St. Paul's s
German church, this city, for more
than twenty-five years, was yester-
day formally installed as pastor of
the edIfice. This action was taken
following the receiving of DR.. Ganss
as a member of the Chassis of New
Brunswick to make him a full pas
tor of the church. The installation
ceremony was held at the church at
3 o'clock and was impressive
throughout.
The church was crowded to the
doors, some of whom had to stand
during the service Rev. Harold Z.
Green. president of the Chassis, of
New Brunswick, presided and con-
Quoted the installation ceremonies
An elaborate program was carried
out following the organ prelude by
Miss Julia Ganss, organist, and the
anthem, Press on o Pilgrim" by
the choir.
Rev. Julius Geyer, of New York
City, made the prayer and Rev.
Floris Ferwerda, of Bound Brook,
read from the Scriptures and preach
ed the sermon. Rev. DR.. Geyer gave
the charge to the pastor. and Rev.
James H. Northrup, pastor of the
First Presbyterian church, gave the
charge to the people.
The Maennerchor Society, who
were present, sang an anthem dur
ing the service. At the close Rev
DR.. Ganss pronounced the benedic-
ton. DR.. Ganss, who is also pastor
of St. Peters German church, Krei-
scherville, and resides there, will
still retain his residence there He
has been pastor of the Kreischer-
vile church for over twenty-five
years.
The following was the order of
service yesterday:
The Rev. Harold E. Green, pTesi-
dent Of Chassis, presiding.
Organ Prelude -. Miss Julia Ganss
Invocation
Anthem-"Press On, 0 Pilgrims
Choir
Scripture Reading
Prayer .... Rev. Dr.. Julius GeyeT
Hymn No. 213
Sermon. -. Rev. Floris Ferwerda
Anthem .........,... MaenueichoI
Charge to the pastor
Rev. Dr.. Julius Geyer
Charge to the people
Rev. James Northrup
The Order of Installation
President of Chassis
Hymn No. rs
Collection
Benediction ..........The Pastor
Doxology
Organ Postlude
Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-04-29
NO LIMIT ON
THE TICKETS
P. R. R. to N. Y. Good Until
Used Changes.

There will be no limit on the
validity Of tickets on the Pennsyl-
MIA railroad between this city and
New York and the limit on tickets on
points west from Railway to New
Brunswick will be increased to ten
days. Tickets on the Camden and
Amboy division increased from two
to ten days after May 1. At the pres
ent time tickets between this city
and New York and other points be-
tween those places as well are only
good for eleven days.
Howard White, local representa-
tive for the railroad company re-
ceived notification last week Of tho
coming change. He says it will be
welcomed by many that travel be-
tween this city and New York. 1t
includes tickets from Woodbridge,
Railway, Elizabeth and Newark, go
ing in both directions,