The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1912-04-09
BY ESTHER GRIFFIN WHITE.

Talk about the high price of liv-
ing!" said Sarah
Have you been skinned" inquired
the cynic.
Have T." acclaimed Sarah You've
said it,"
Its this way" she went on conf
dentially. while it is the truth that
have toured Europe several times and
sat out all sorts of restaurants, hotels,
cafes and other eating emporiums,
never can make out these la carte
menus.
They're so crowded together they
confuse me-
Roast turkey with cranberry sauce
oyerlaps sauer-kraut and spare ribs,
spring lamb with mint sauce crowds
porter-house steak and prime ribs of
beef-what the deuce is prime rib
tanyway-potatoes elbow cauliflower
with or without addendums, and sal
lads stand cheek by jowl with entrees.
so how can you tell?"
"A man could" said the cync.
We'll can't SO | just order any
thing and trust to luck that it won't
break my bank"
"The way these people hold you up
and rob you is fright" continued Sal.
The other day | ordered some stuff
and when got to tomatoes the waiter
said
lone portion?'
I "Why certainly | said. Il was all
alone. Wasn't it plain TO be seen l
wasn't ordering for regiment?
"They brought me in enough turkey
to feed a family of ten and so many
trawberries | left over half of EN-.
And my bill-whew!" whistled Sal
Three walters grouped themselves
round my chair and contended for the
mastery when l began to put on my
scoat. One of 'em chased me nearly to
lthe door.
81 think" grinned Sal, they thought
Il was a chorus girl off on spree"
And you tipped him | suppose?''
murmured the cynic interrogatively.
Sure said Sal. What can you
do?"
II thought you were a suffra gette, -
deployed the cynic.
Cut out 'suffragette,' said Sal.
!"Don't you know there aren't any in
this country"
"Why-er-really! exclaimed the
cynic. Didn't you organize something
here the other day and did You tell
me, or was | dreaming, that you had a
convention in the state capital
You didn't dream-your ears con-
Quoted properly. But there aren't any
suffragettes," repeated Sal. "They are
suffragists!"
"Ah!" whispered the cync.
"Suffragette is a term of oppro-
blum" continued Sal, that was cast
at the militant ones in England In
this country we don't throw brickbats
We simply ask for things and they are
handed to us on a silver salver. See?
"Perfectly--perfectly cried the
cynic. But even a suffragist should
join the anti-tippng crusade.
mot If she's staying in hotel and
goes back the same day" smiled Sarah
sardonically. you've got to tip or you
don't get anything"
"This thing must stop" eXclaime ID
the cynic. Il myself will have bill in
troduced in the next Legislature"
Pooh" said SAL you won't do a
thing | don't know worse Upper
than you-don't you remember the
time you gave a five dollar bill to a
bell-boy in Chicago.
Il was drunk!" avowed the cynic
We'll, we're getting off our tack.
ssaid Sal. 1T is certainly crime and
a sin the way those people denuded
me of my hard earned shekels.
Il feel perfectly positive they re
tired behind some doorway and alb
lstracted from the bill ! gave them the
half of the price for the two portions
of strawberries and turkey and divid
ed the swag between them.
When the waiter asked about the
one portion of tomatoes his conscience
probably smote him
I'm common parlance," continued
Sal, 1T was shame to take the mon
ey.' he may have thought"
SAL, Sal! you need guardian,
murmured the cynic.
"Guardian!" exclaimed Sal "Womer
wouldn't need guardians if mel
wouldn't all the time take advantage
sof the fact that they are women. Wha
1.-THE world needs is complete change
of social procedure"
Good heavens!" exclaimed the Gym
tic, ARE you a Socialist, tool"
We'll whatever l am or am not" re
tplied Sal. Il wish they'd appoint a com
mission to investigate a la carte menus
and compel hotels to plat 'em out fol
the common or garden variety of eater
instead of the cocktail set
AS they are now they're cryptic
grams for the rounders'
The great point is grinned the
tcynic, did you enjoy your dinner?'
"Luncheon-not dinner," corrected
Sal
But did your
Il confess l never tasted better
said Sal.
"Well?"
sWen?"
I'VE seem to have exhausted th<
subject said the cynic lighting
cigarette.
mo we haven't" cried Sal, blu
Wen change it because I'm tired talk
ing about things to eat Lets talk abou
constitutions.
Il confess don't follow you" muir
INJURED the cynic. Your mental aero
battles are beyond me-