The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1912-05-31
Her Unlucky
Star

girls rented a cottage for a month
at Robinsdale and I endeavored with
my most persuasive arts to engage the
wealthy landed proprietress to do our
homework? Perhaps you recall how l
iabored with her under the mistaken
idea that she was newcomer in this
land of the free and that she was
looking for a Job as cook when she
came to see uS?"
Eyes, remember" answered Helen,
with reminiscent giggle. I'm sure
if \ hadn't had the presence of mind
to explain to her that You were so pit
iably near sighted you could scarcely
distinguish the faces Of your most in
innate friends she would have turned
us all out of the cottage in her indig-
nation. I hope 1 shall be forgiven
that very helpful little fiction about
your defective Sight"
do you reoollect," inquired Laura
sternly, that other occasion when
told the girl who roomed next to us
at st. Agnes school that l had almost
persisted during the sermon Of the
long winded stranger preacher who
had been inflicted on us in the chapel
one morning?"
EYES," responded Helen, cheerily,
"and she told you with unnecessary
emphasis that the visiting clergyman
was her father! I haven't forgotten
your expression of dismay. 1t was
too comical And the enormous guam
titles of our precious goodies that you
lavished upon her failed to soothe her
injured feelings"
did l ever tell you," Laura asked
again with grim countenance, "how
last summer l gratuitOusly and force
fully favored a Princeton freshman
with my scathing opinion of any boy
who couldn't pass his college en-
trance examinations? IF did tell you
| must have added that I found out
later that he was conditioned On three
studies. Of course the bright little
summer Irritation with him that l had
dreamed of promptly shriveled into a
mere frigid acquaintance"
why do you indulge in these pain
full "reminiscences" demanded Helen.
Because of all the many malapro-
pos things I have ever said or done
there is none other that equals my
| latest Helen, behold in me q culver
ing mass Of contritioni | am think
ing of having my horoscope cast by
some professional wizard III the hope
| Of discovering under which planet
am especially prone to make unfortu-
nate remarks to the horror Of myself
and the Indignation OF my acquaint-
ances. Then | could either have my
! self gagged or l could retire from So
ciety during that destructive period
Your latest unfortunate remark
must have been even worse than the
one you made that time when you
mentioned to Mrs. Ackers out at the
| golf club that you had greatly en-
| joyed being in foursome with her
son and she thereupOn Jelly Informed
you that she had no son and that
! Mr. Acker was her hush nd"
! "Oh, that was a mere pleasantly
compared to the thorough manner in
which l have forever lowered myself
! in the opinion Of my cousin, Tom Bur
rows You know that l have always
| adored dear old Tom and when he
| confded to me a week ago that he was
| engaged | was tremendously excited.
| begged him 10 tell me the name of
| the lucky girl. He described all her
charms glowingly but refused to di-
vulge her name-just to tease me, !
supposed, for Tom has always been an
| incorrigible tease.
well, last evening at the Montrose
! dance Tom came to me and said that
! the time had come for the great meet
ing of his favorite cousin and his
sweetheart.
Il eagerly followed him across the
! floor to the side of most attractive
looking girl. Then Tom actually in
troduced her to me as Miss Snickle.
fritz
"'Oh Toni I exclaimed, reproach
fully, How horrid of you,'
Then | turned to the girl and said
of course you've learned already that
my cousin always has to have his lit
| tie joke under all imaginable circum-
stances
tom glared at me furiously, but |
couldn't understand why, so | con
tinued as pleasantly as l could, please
tell me your real name.
'Snicklefritz,' she murmured.
Il almost collapsed. Do you wonder
that l feel it is necessary for me to
take some kind Of cure? l suppose
Tom will never forgive me-"
Most certainly not, Laura" was
Helen's none too comforting assur.
ance. How could he, when the name
is doubtless a thorn in his flesh
Snicklefritz! Isn't it dreadful? How
delighted she will be to change her