davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
DIsRAELI AS A SON.
His Generosity In Becoming Recon-
eiod 70 His Father.

cilod to His Father.
Lord Dufrerin used to tell the follow
ing story about his mother and Dis.
raeli:
My mother was among the first Of
Disraell's acquaintance to recognize
his great ability. and she saw a great
deal Of him when at Mrs. Norton's.
when he was a young man about town.
She did not see very much Of him after
he had once entered upon his political
career. Here, however. is a little anec-
dote which Is very characteristic and
amusing. Ny mother had great ad-
miration for the "Curiosities OF Litera-
ture" and was anxious to make the ac-
quaintance Of Disraeli's father. but
there was a difficulty about this. as at
the moment he was not on good terms
with his father.
However. he appeared one day with
his father In tow. As soon as they
were both seated Disraell turned around
and, looking at his father as If be were
a piece Of ornamental china. said to
my mother: Madam. | have brought
you my father | have become recon
ciled to my father on two conditions
The first was that he should come to
see you and the second that he should
pay my debts"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

A medical man in France was asked
to be present at a duel in his profes-
sional capacity. He got up early, trav-
eled some miles. famed the swords
and ministered to his client. who was
slightly wounded When both honor
and wound were healed he looked for
his fees and sent in bill for $40. The
patient replied through his wife, who
wrote: 81 am told that between men
there Is question of delicacy which
forblds even the slightest appearance
Of trade in such matter. Neither the
doctors nor the seconds are brought on
the ground for money. If you persist
In your claim shall. to my great re-
gret. be obliged to leave to others the
duty of settling this fine point with
YOU"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
ZEAL VALUE OF PLAY.
A Brief Period snatehed From the
Regular Routine Aids Health.

A Brief Period Snatehed From the
Regular Routine Aids Health.
Self improvement societies that have
tried to find the best way to live have
never discovered anything more vaiu-
able than play. says Golfers Weekly.
A man may shake mp a continent by
bis energy or build kingdoms by his
brains. but so. far as his personal life
IS concerned be has been failure II
be has not learned to play.
Play. OF course. IL not confined to
games. It may be walk in the woods.
row upon the river. sail upon the
lake. To some making garden is play.
as to others is chopping wood. To play
Is to follow the irresponsible inciina-
tion which gives the most pleasure
with the least mental strain and bodily
wear.
Ideal play is brief period Of care
free living sna.ched from the regular
routine. 1t Is enjoying the pleasure OF
being alive; It is absorbing from the
earth and air and sun without con-
scious effort More and more we are
trying to teach the children how to
play. but we do not know how our
selves. Before US always is the bogy
Of wasting time. and the devil Of dis
ease, old age, misery and failure never
invented a falser bogy. We send our
children to the public playground and
go on ourselves getting soggy and
heavy and gloomy and nervous
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
TIA. MARYLAND. FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER q l9l2.
UNCLE SANS "MlDDIEs."
rraining and Discipline That Prspars
Them For tho Navy.

NucfU F0f Niiu NNdNJs
The pay Of a midshipmun is 5000 PEI
year. aud this begins On the day Of
bis admission to the academy. He ai
once spends Sl20Gl for clothing. bed
ding and other equipments some OF
which are as follows: A rug for "a
cents, hair pillow FOR Is cents. six
pilloweases for Y cents and siS
aheets for S420 So It eau be seen that
his apartments will not be luxurious
He must deposit $50 when he enters
and this will be credited on the book
of the pay officer to be expended by
the direction Of the superintendent in
the purchase Of textbooks. etc.
When he has been fully entered as a
midshipman 1t is the aim Of the officers
in charge to educate the young man "a
become a competent naval othcer-tc
become a master Of the art of maritime
warfare. to be "A gentleman as well as
nn officer and to hold honor and duty
to country paramount to everything
else. The neatness IN dress Of the ON.
Ger Of the United States navy Is pro.
verbal. and only those who come 81
close contact with him can appreciate
the change four years at the Naval
academy can make in the habits. dress
and manners Of young man. to say
nothing Of the excellent education he
receives
The mldshipman has few luxuries AT
the academy His room Is furnished IN
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
IRvING'S STAGE EFFECTS.
silence. Light and Just One Other Es.
sential Produced Them.

6ilence, Light and Just One Other Es'
sential Produced Them.
Wendell Phillips Dodge relates In the
London Strand Magazine an incident
growing out of the first meeting Of
Robert Mantell with Sir Henry Irving
back ia 1852. when both were playing
Romeo in London. There We're re
viewers who found Irving too old fol
the youthful Romeo. aud one advised
that he should make way for "ths
young fellow over at the Olympic"
Irving prepared special Afternoon
performance in the Lyceum. to whiet
all the players in London were invited
After II was over Mantell went bach
of the stage. and Irving asked him how
he liked tie performance. 1T has beer
like an Afternoon al school with con
genial lessons" rcplls-d Mantell. How
do you do II? How do you manage eff
fects? How do you get such atmos
phere, such realization Of the glory
of the tragedy. with such little effort
Is there no recipe?"
There Is indeed. there is. answered
Irving: simple. too--only three things
to remember The first Is silence and
plenty of it behind the scenes. so thai
the actor may be at ease. with moth
ing 10 district when striving for his
shadings. The second is light. regu
lated as far as possible so that nature
is couuterfeited. and that. young man
Is the recipe"
But" protested Mantell. won said
there were three things to remember
You have mentioned but two Is there
third"
did say a tliird?" asked Irving
-Um-perhaps did, perhaps did
but what could have had In mind
Let me see. All. yes. silence. light
and-um. shall say-actorsf Remem
Der that. my boy. actors. Silence. light
and-actors. that is the third
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

The following well authenticated
anecdote will serve to show what man
uer Of man Henry Of Navarro was:
-)ne day. while on his way to join a
hunting party. a eountryman whom
he had overtaken on the road asked
him where he was going. II am going
on to attend the kings hunt" replied
Henry. That's where I'm going"
said the rustic. Il have heard lots
about the king. and want to.see how
he looks" Jump up behind me-" said
Henry, As they logged along the
countryman asked. How will know
the king from the others?" "He will
have his hat on, and all the rest will
uncover when he arrives" answered
Henry. When the pair finally reached
the party every hat went OF. 'Where's
the kingT" asked Henry of the rustic.
at must be either you or me-" re-
sponded the countryman. 'for we are
the only fellows who have our hats
on"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

An authority on boating and swim
ming advises thar every boy and girI
who is learning to swim also learn to
undress in the water. so that in case
Of falling overheard from a boat there
will be less danger OF drowning. Put
on old clothes. he says. swim with one
hand and the opposite foot and take
of the shoe from the free foot with
the free hand. After the shoes are on
they being the first things to get rid Of.
the swimmer should turn on his back
and take OF his clothes or as many as
he can get of. swimming meanwhile
with his legs. New York Herald
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Charles Wesley. brother Of John Yves
ley. who founded the Methodist church,
wrote some 5000 hymns. Jesus, Low
er Of My Soul" was the most popular
of any be wrote He got the idea for
this one day as he was sitting at his
desk. A bird pursued by a hawk few
In at the open window. The hawk.
afraid to follow. flew away, and Wes-
ley. struck by the incident. was at ouce
inspired TO write song, applying what
he had witnessed to our spiritual life
Kansas City star.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

"You will remember" said she
haughtily. that you proposed to me
four times before consentec to marry
you. You wouldn't take no for an
answer"
II remember" he replied sadly. "lt
seems to me that every time you have
changed your mind I've got the worst
Of t"-Exchange
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

TITS so ridiculous" said Chony Sap
head. ITO say that clothes don't make
the man."
"Indeed?" replied Miss Pepprey.
''Yaas. Yon see. II n fellow like me
didn't have such lots Of clothes be
wouldn't need man Catholic
Standard and Times.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Boswell. when his first biography OF
johnson first appeared. met Lord Thur
low hurrylng through Parliament
street TO th house Of lords and said,
"Have you read my bookT"
Yes. confonnd you" growled Lord
fhurlow. every word Of it. couldn't
help myself
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Landlady Would you advise me to
send my daughter to a cooking school
or to a music school: Boarder FeHee.
tivelyi- Well. ! think I'd send her to a
cooking school. 1t may he more fatal
In its results. but 1t Isn't anything like
so noisy.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

wife-According to this paper. hot
water will prevent wrinkles. Huband
-So7 Then how do you account for
the numerous wrinkles have? Wife
How do account for them? Husband
Yes; you keep me In hot water near
ly all the time. you know.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Miss Fluffy-I made quite an impress
sion at the reception. didn't II Every.
body seemed to be talking about me-
Candid Friend-They talked still more
about you after you had gonel
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

French Teacher-Now. Tommy. what
is money in Frenchl Tommy-Argent.
French Teacher-Good. and what gen
der is iti Tommy-Femlnine; money
talks.-Satlre.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
A serap.

II wonder said the bald boardey.
''why iiei'i Is called n scrapT"
"Becausp It IS u broken peace" the
cheerful IDIOT explained. with his
usual promplitude.- Stray Stories
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Blobbs-Do you think Miss Antique
would appreciate a birthday present;
Slobbs- Not so much Us birthday alb
sent.-rhlladelphia Record.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Farmer Hornheak What's your
nephew that graduated from college 3
spell ago do'n' now? Farmer Bentoyef
-Still colorin' meerschaum pipe
Judge.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

"9as your wife complained very
longr' asked the DOCTOR
Ever since we were married" re.
piled Meekly sadly.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Nations. like individuals. live or die.
but civilization cannot perlsh.-Maz
zini.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27
The Marconi Wireless Tele-
graph Company.
"CHESAPEAKE LINE.n
SCHEDULE,

Two new steamers "City Of Baltin.sfe'
nd "City of Norfolk.
SouthbouDd daily.
Lv. Baltimore. e..........G.3O p. NJ.
Lv. Old Point Comfort, 4 100 A. NJ.
Ar. Norfolk. ......... 100 A. NJ.
Northbound daily except Sunday
Lv. Norfolk k..........6.l5 p. NJ.
Lv. Old Point Comfort. .715 p. NJ
Ar. Baltimore. re........7.OOA. A. NJ,
YORK RIVER LINE.n
For West Point and Richmond, Va.
Steamer leaves Baltimore on Tuesday,
Thursday and Saturday at P. N
and arrives West Point at 7.45 A. NJ
and Richmond at $50 A. NJ.
Steamers call at Gloucester Point,
Yorktown, Clements, Clay Bank and
Almonds, weather permitting.
Steamers leave Baltimore from Piers
Island 10 Light Street Wharf.
Through tickets to all points may be
ecnred, baggage checked and g
ooms reserved from the City Ticket
Offices. 119 Z. Baltimore ST., ARTHUR
W. ROBSON, Agent, 127 K. Baltimore
St.,
Offices, Light & Lee Sts., Baltimore, Nd,
Z. J. CHISM, Geul. Passenger Agent
CHI APMAN. Asst. GenI Pass. Agt.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Economy is in itself a source Of great
revenue. Seneca
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1912-09-27

Two new steamers "City Of Baltin.see'
nd "City Of Norfolk.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16
''Th' grocer thinkiin' iv tn author
Nv dhried apples"

gr-reatest yeve got to tell me what is ye'er
idee iv great Father Kelly says mans
great who do tn thing he knows how
to do betther thin most annywan else. That is,
If he has tn luck to cash in. Be that rule l can
prove yere tn akel iv Joolyus Cayzar, FIR I've
observed yeer scientific handn iv shovel, me
boy, though I've nver mentioned it FIR fear Nv
turnin' ye'er head.
But whin 1 look over these lists I'm disap-
pinted in not SEEM tn rnintion iv nanny bini-
factor iv humanity that I've always looked up to.
I'm gon to make out own list I've as good
a right as annywan. An tn name I'll put down
fourth is tn fellow that invinted suspinders I've
often talked to ye about him. He's wan iv me
gr-reatest heroes. | don't know his name, but
vry time l look down at legs an see they're
properly dhraped I think kindly v this JANUS
I wanst had idee that suspinders was wan iv
tn oldest iv human institutions. l suppose ivry-
body did. That's tn careless way we take tn
great gifts Nv science. We think there niver
time whin there weren't all these
vayniences. We have no thought Nv tn lone stu
dent settin' undher TIL midnight lamp an dopin'
thin out FIR tn benefit iv a thank1ess race. 1
that tn second thing Adam bought
afther he become ashamed iv himsilf-an' he'd
ought not to be goin' around that way aven if
twas only his own family that cud see hm-was
a pair iv suspinders to hold thin up. But it
amt SO. Firm what Hogan tells they're
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16

an sprains his back tfryin' to throw tn hammer
his feet, thinks that mex to tn athaleets
mentioned Flanagan, who cud throw tn hammer
over tn moon if he wanted to- is tn head iv tn
list. Yeer little boy thinks it's tn dhriver iv
Hook an Laddher Five. Ye'er oldest boy thinks
it's Cap Chance. Yeer daughter thinks it's Jawn
Dhrew. An author heads TIL list with tn two
Dutchmen that invinted printin', though Father
Kelly says authors was just well off whin they
chalked their novels piece iv slate an
charged people much head to look at thin.
They were their own publisher in thin days
Ask Chinyman to put down tn hundherd
gr-reatest men he liver herd iv an we won't rec
onize onless it reminds we iv wrere We
lost shirt A German will pack tn list as full
iv Germans as brass band There'n be nawttin'
but Shakespeare an Fr-rinch in tn Fr-rinch list
an tn Rooshyan list wud make tn chief iv polls
sind out riot call.
An they're right, all iv thin. If Shakespeare
goes on tn list because he cud throw pome
farther thin amy man befure or since, Flanagan
ought to go on because he can throw tn hammer
Jack Johnson is as great in his way as
Prlsidlnt Eliot They've both got tn punch, but
It's in diff'rent way. Look out iv tn window
at that fellow acrost tn sthreet climbin I'D der
rick with a hammer in wan hand, a monkey
wrench between his teeth an bag iv spikes
hangin' firm his neck. Cud Hogans frnd Mil
ton do that? He cud not no more thin that
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16
Nv susp1nders.

acrobat cud write Shurdan's Ride or whativer
1t was. Nanny that cud capture this here
city with hand cudden't bate a carpet.
Nanny that cud rule hundherd milyon
strangers with an ir'n hand is careful to take
off his shoes in tn front hallway whin he comes
home late at night
What makes a great anyhow. 1t
isn't because he's good, though it may be because
he isn't. Nanny hero iv antiEity has pitcher
iv somewan else in tn gcold watch tn boys in tn
office give him FIR Christmas. It amt because
he's betther iddycated thin Others There ARE
fellows tachin' school in Waukegan that cud spell
betther thin Alexander tn Gr-reat It amt
because he's pretty. An album filled with pitch
ers Nv tn gr-reatest cud only be opened afther
dark. 1t amt because they're brave. Nanny a
man has voted tn Republican tickey in Missis-
sppi without gettin' his name on tn tally
sheet 1t amt because they're forchnit. Tn on'y
fellows ye reminder who wint up in flynn
masheens last year ARE thin that come down
too quick. An it amt because they plan things
in advance, FIR there was Columbus, whose name
is on NANNY lamp posts, an he didn't find what
he wint lookn' FIR, Hogan tells me, an it wasn't
America he discovered at first but a place called
Watling's island that he bumped into on his way
to Chiny, tn poor deluded Eyetalyan thnkn'
Chiny was somewheres near Phillydelphy.
So there ye ar-re. Befure ye pick out TIL
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16

iv tn hundherd gr-reatest men in tn
wurruld that ARE now dead"
didn't know there were that nanny" said
Mr. Hennessy
No more did l." said Mr. Dooley. e" But
judgin' be what's been turned in be tn boys as
their pick w TIL wurruld's championship team
there's not a hundherd-theres a millyon.
don't know most iv thin. They done things in
thrades that know nawthn' about. Ye see, ivry
wan that's asked puts down names iv 1a-ads in
their own business. They all start with Shak-
speare, Wash'nton, an Lincoln but they're lible
to wind up with Ephraim Perkins, who was tn
champeen calcyrniner iv his time.
" Twas Andrew Carnaygie started it, iv
coorse There's a man I like. He's good
comP'ny. Whin nobody is talkin' an some people
ar-re thinkin " goin home, he's always ready to
Jump in and get up some kind iv parlor intertain-
mint, whether tits rayformed spellin', or peace
conference, hundherd gr-reatest men compy-
tition. He turned in tn first list himsilf AS it
was originally, dye mind, there hundherd
an wan names on tn list but he scratched off tn
first wan, sayin, Z I don't want to crowd amy
good fellow out at the bottom he says. Ask
me who ARE tn hundherd gr-reatest men in
histhry,' he says. Ye won't? Well, I'll tell We
who they ar-re,' he says, an he puts down Shak
speare, Washnton, Lincoln Cyrus Butts, tn in
vintor iv tn pick; Lemuel Higgins, tn invintor
Nv tn steam hoist; tn man that discovered Poland
an Bohayna, an lot Nv other artists that done
things to make tn steel business what it is today
He is right about it, too. He oughtnt to take all
tn blame hinsf.
Well, he'd no sooner suggested this rough but
injyable sport thin tn whole wurruld set down
an begun maxim out lists, an ivry done just
as Andrew done. Ivry to his graft, as tn
sayin' is. pote picks out a hundherd potes
who he thinks ARE in his class, or nearly so. A
banker can't anybody but Shakespeare
Wash'nton, an Lincoln EXCEPT tn boys that can
separate money with their thumbs. A BARTENDER
tells ye that tn customers he wud like to see on
dull avenin' ARE Shakespeare, Wash nton, Lin
coin, an tn janiuses that has had cocktails named
afther thin. It's crowded ordher, but It's as
are way to fame amy know Cinchries
Kr'm now Col Hickey will be cillybrated whin
people can't raymnber whether it was Roodyard
Kipling or Laura Jean Libbey that lived in
Brooklyn A manufacturer iv furniture ac-
knowedges that tn men that have had most inf1u-
ence on his life were Shakespeare, Wash'nton.
Lincoln, an tn invintor " curled hair A gro
Gerry man says that his eyes ARE dirnrned with
tears ivry time he thinks iv Shakespeare, Wasf'n-
ton, Lincoln, an tn author iv dhried apples
Cassidy, who goes out to Celtic park ivry Sundaf
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16

almost what ye might call modhern invintion
F'r eight thousan' years, accoordin' to Father
kelly's count, or fT eight thousan' millyon years
tn way they add it up in tn colleges, tn
wurrud wint without thin till this modest frnd
iv man come along with an invntion that has
made it possible FIR mankind to fight tn battles
iv tn wurrud with both hands free liver since
Hogan told me this can't read histhry without
putin in lines that make me shiver. Give me
liberty or give DEATH says PathricI1 Hinnery,
raisin' his hands above his head with passyonate
gesture, accoordin' to histhry. Give me liberty
or give DEATH says PATRICK Hinnery raisin'
wan hand above his head, accoordin' to me- No
wondher sojers in tn old times were brave They
cudden't away comfortably. An I've always
Wondered how tn Fr-rinch cud talk at all in
thin dark DAYS
Who else wud put on me list? Faith I
don't know. Nanny great developments has
been made in me line iv business since liquor
merchants used to go ar-round sellin' pnts out
~ leather bag l wud mention tn creators iv
tn beer pump, TIL cash regsther, tn confirmation
cheese, cracker, an coffee plate, tn seegar
lighter, an tn injanyous device f'r cuttin off tn
ends Nv seegars which in oncivilized peeryods was
bit off. So far as I'm consumed they were
gr-reater men thin tn heroes that made life
pleasanter FIR me frind Andrew. But I'm willin'
to accept amy mans list so long it don't in
clude tn invintor iv tn alarm clock an tn gas
meter I've got thin on me other list. IT'S a
good sign whin people acknowledge that other
people ARE gr-reat. 1t shows sef-resthraint
It's far aisier to say no man was gr-reat. An
ye can always prove that, FIR there's somethin'
tn matther with ivry man, an if there wasn't
he'd be 1ynched. 1 wondher who'll be tn gr-reat
men iv today hundherd years firm now.
Lookin' over contemporaries, shud say that
almost annywan has chanst. Posterity Hin
Missy, sometimes likes to vote FIR tn dark horse
There's wan thing ye may be Nv, an that is
that nanny boy that thinks he's got tn diploma
in his bag won't figure in tn biographical
ditchnries. Faith, I wudden't be surprised at all
if ye got in ye'ersilf. A hundherd years firm
now man may pick up histhry iv our country
an read: AT this peeryod there ar-rose re-
markabIe figure in tn person of Malachi Hin
Missy. FIR cinchries tn wurruld had been full iv
talk. Now FIR tn first time there appeared
man who cud listen. He was tn foundher iv tn
pow'rfu school that includes at tn prisnt day
most iv tn thoughtful men iv tn wurruld.'"
But l haven't been listenin'," said Mr. Hen
messy.
Well" said Mr. Dooley, if we won't talk
IN we won't listen We have ye'er thrunk
checked to tn Hall iv Fame tonight. Yeer
Iicted."
Copyright: 1912: BY Finley DunnSl
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-03-16
They re lible to wind up with
Ephraim Perkins.

XXI SEE" said Mr.. Dooley, that lot Nv
people has been asked to make out a list
iv tn hundherd gr-reatest men in tn