davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
APP: BEAT POLICE;
SNAKE: FOR WEAPON
ATerribIe Heinie" Gets Out Of His
Cage and Creates Great
CONSERVATION.
SMASHES SNAKE CASE
Similar on Wild Rampage In Reptile
Shop Sets the Wrfggting Mass In.
Kaleidoscope OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
Comes to Rescue.

New York.-Heinie, the terrible ape
(take 1t from the polioe), got loose
from his cage in an animal store on
Cortland street the other day, and ere
Rted CONSERVATION.
A large crowd gathered between
church and Greenwich streets on :Corf-
land street and drew the attention OF
Patrolman Patrick O'Brien, who found
the ape breaking showcases and eat
ing rare Japanese goldfish. The ape
did about $1,000 worth of damage be-
fore he got through.
O'Brien called Policeman Arras and
they went around to the Greenwich
street station and returned with Lieu
tenant Andrew Devery and five police
men. The policemen forced the door
Of the store and went inside. The fun
commenced while the crowd laughed
and cheered. y
Heinie retreated to the rear of the
store and smashed a glass case from
which crawled a number Of snakes
large and small.
SEEKING the largest by the tail, Helm
ie began swinging the reptile about
his head. With a howl all the peace
1 guardians tried to get through the
door at the same time and fell all .oyel
each other trying. Meanwhile Hein1e
was advancing.
"Sure, and it Is no place for son
! OF Ireland" said o'Brien.
1 "Haf Hal! Ha! Hal" screamed {
hooking voice, coming APPARENT,
from nowhere. 'Fraid cat, fraid cat
Rraid cat,'' screamed the voice. O'Brier
booked up and fastened his ey'
ualevolently on parrot with bril-
tant plumage.
"You' began O'Brien. A piece
i OF wfggling snake directed by Heini'
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
PEcULIARITIEs or ANIMALS

Tortoises and turtles have no teeth.
Both mandibles Of the parrots beak
are movables, but most birds are able
70 move only one.
The horse has no eyebrows. The
appearance OF much white In the eye
OF a horse Indicates vicious nature.
The stork is partial to kittens as
an article Of food. and the cats re-
ciprocate by a love for young storks.
The frog, owing to its peculiar
structure, cannot breathe with the
mouth open. and II 1t were forcibly
kept open the animal would die OF
suffocation.
Whalebone is found In the mouth OF
the whalebone whale, where 1t forms
the substitute for the teeth, OF Wnicn
otherwise the animal is destitute.
E Pigs are poor swimmers, their fore
legs being set closely under them.
and when they fall into the water
they sometimes cut their threats
with the sharp points of their cloyen
feet.
The eyes Of hares are never closed,
as they are unprovided with eyeilds
Instead thereof they have thin mem
brane which covers the eye when
asleep. and probably also when a
rest.
The deer Is furnished with supple
mentary breathing places in addition
to the nostrils, and this would appear
to be an extraordinary provision O
nature giving the beast OF the chase
a freer respiration.
Fishes swallow their food hastily
and without mastication, because the.
are obliged increasingly to open ant
close the jaws for the purpose Q
respiration and cannot long retail
food in the mouth when quite shut
The hump on the back Of tn
oromedary is an accumulation Of
secular species OF fat, which Is !.
tore Of nourishment benehcently Pre-
j E.ded against the day Of fasting.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

will be fairly decent IL woman treats
them decently. That means feeding
them properly and keeping up LIE
like appearance of cheerfulness. ]
practiced that on poor dear Henry
Merriwid so long that I'm letter
perfect"
"That may be-" conceded Aunt
Jane. seBut If you want child to
raise, why not go to an orphan
asylum
II thought we were going to consid-
er this matter seriously" said Mrs.
Merriwid. "And from a matrimonial
point Of view. dearie, I wouldn't
have to wipe Teddie's little noty-poty
or see that he washed his neck and
around his ears, or worry about his
habits of climbing trees and going
swimming. I might have worries. but
not that kind. I'm considering the adj
vantage of marrying a young man.
| Well, he wouldn't have any murky
past, to begin with, and think could
take care that he wouldn't have any
Objectionable future, If / undertook
1 Its management. Then he would have
generous impulses and large enthust
asms. Teddie has. All the freshness
and kindness hasn't been knocked out
OF him. He has fine ideals and ambt
lions and think 1t would be awfully
interesting to direct them. Life
doesn't mean money grubbing to him
It means poetry and philanthropy and
romance and righteousness and music
and-moonshine and such. He ISM
bald and blase. He hasn't any rhesi
matte tendencies or stomach trouble
| and as I intimated, he thinks an
something wonderful"
4 'How do you think 1t would be u
| ten years time when you were goinl
on for fifty and he was hardly NOR
than thirtyp inquired Aunt Jane.
4 "Auntie!" demonstrated Mrs. Merr'
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

wild. "How very catty! II he were
hardly thirty, I should be barely forty.
but waving that, I think it would be
perfectly lovely. I don't expect to
find my faculties failing when I'm CO.
ing on for fifty, even, and shall only
give up my masseuse and my few SIM
pie toilet preparations with the
breath of life. Teddie's youth will be
an additional incentive TO me to keep
beautiful. Most women, when their
husbands begin to show signs Of the
| sere and yellow, allow themselves to
get sloppy and dowdy. That's where
shall have what is vulgarly termed
the edge on them"
aOh, WE'LL" sighed Aunt Jane. 1T
you've decided to make a fool Of your
self, I suppose there's no use talking.
When is the interesting event to take
place, If one may ask?'
| "Don't worry, dearie," said Mrs
Merriwid "I'm not going to marry
poor Teddie. He's a sweet boy and
he's the only one ever told me that
my eyes were pools Of limpid light
but he's such an everlasting calloW Lit
| tie IDIOT
| "Then why" began Aunt Jane II
bewilderment.
'Well, dearie, he'll be wiser when
| get through with him." said Mrs. Mer
riwid. I'm doing him real kind
ness
Copyright, 1912, by w. G. Chapman.)
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
The Modocs.

The Modoc Indians-there were
only few hundred of them-were re-
moved from their old habitat in the
Oregon country by the government.
Not liking the change, they returned
to their old home, and under their
able leader, Captain Jack" defeated
the troops sent to expel them in 1873
During the negotiations for a settle
ment they decoyed the United States
commissioners into an ambush (April
LID and massacred General Candy
and some forty others. Fighting fol,
lowed, and the Indians retreated to
an almost impregnable position. They
were finally surrounded and after 9
brave resistance surrendered. Cap
tain Jack was captured. tried Id
June. 1873, and executed October 8.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

changed man since that Waring mop.
Really, auntie, dear
'.You ought to be ashamed Of your
SELF" said Aunt Jane. mo, I don't
want any more sugar IN my tea.
You're taking advantage OF his youth
and inexperience to make the poor
boy unhappy
Il make him unhappy" exclaimed
Mrs. Merriwid. 'sWhy, sweetheart, he
never knew what happiness was be-
fore he met me. It's the delirium Of
ecstacy-or the ecstacy OF delirium-l
forget which he said-just to be near
| me. And the touch Of my hand
can't recall at this moment exactly
what the touch of my hand is, but
the effect is something fierce, as we
used to say in the office. And when
| you talk of inexperience, well, that
| is to Singer. He knows women up
| and down and ali around, all the
same like book. He's wise to US
auntie. There aren't any Of our little
tricks and manners that he isn't, SC
to speak, hep to. It's positively IN
canny, his penetration where women
| are concerned, That's without any
reference to me, Of course. I'm mo-
an ordinary woman; I'm an enigma
even to him. He admits that. Deal
Teddie!"
81 call it wicked" observed Aun
Jane. IF you were serious, 1t woult
be different. It would be bad enough
then, but as it is, it's wicked"
Mrs. Merriwid set down the cup Q
tea she had been slipping and Leaned
back in her chair and sighed. :,
wonder If I'm not serious?" she said
"'Why shouldn't be? Look at it i
q reasonable light, auntie. Would
be any disadvantage to him to have
wife who was old enough 70 hay
some sense? Suppose he marie
some half-fedged broiler, as ne prof.
ably will in the course CT time II
let him go. Well, she'll make hiT
{ miserable by expecting too much
him, and she'll be miserable hersel
5 because he isn't all her fancy painted
and then he'll be more miserable
Now I wouldn't expect anything u
reasonably angelic, because I've see
too many men, young and old, to e.
i tsztsin any illusions. Most Of thel
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
MELISSA DOES NOT CARE FOR
. cALLoW YOUTH.

"You needn't tell mel" SAID MRS.
Merriwid's maternal maiden aunt
Jane, Indignantly.
Mrs. Merriwid held back the loose
sleeve of her tea gown with one mana
while she poured with the other q
movement which displayed the beau
ties of her arm and hand, literally, TO
admiration. It was a pity that no one
hit Aunt Jane was present. At the
same time, Mrs. MerriWid's eyes
sparkled mischievously and she gig.
gled so that she spilled the tea.
.syery well, dearie," she said. u
went tell you"
"He needs spanking" declared Aunt
Jane, rubbing her nose, as she had 9
habit Of doing when vexed, land you
do too," she added. "Why, he's an IN
FAINT! And you, you are
Count on your fingers suggested
Mrs. MerriWid. "You won't have t
wrinkle up your forehead SO much
Or TIL tell you, to save trouble. I'm
/ twenty-eightSif I'm a day"
You're thirty" snapped Aunt Jane
| land he isn't much over twenty.
'But he's large for his age" sait
Mrs. Merriwid, dimpling. six fee
and over. And you must admit tina
1 am remarkably well preserved, s.
that the disparity isn't really SO grea
as 1t might seem at the first blush
Some Of the happiest marriages--
"Fiddle!" Aunt Jane interrupted
"You know better
/ "And he's seen a great deal OF tn
j world" Mrs. Merriwid continued, dis
regarding the interruption. He say
80, himself He has been. In fact.
bit of devil. but, of course, that wa
before he came under my ennobling an
i refining influence. He finds himsel
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
DIVORCE IN VARIOUS LANDS

IN Hindostan either party for q
slight cause may leave the other ana
marry.
In the olden times The Jews had 9
discretionary power OF divorcing tnear
wives.
Divorces are scarcely allowed In
Tibet, unless with the consent OF
both parties. Remarriage Is forDao-
den.
IA Cochin China the parties desir-
ing divorce break a pair OF chopst1cKs
In the presence OF witnesses and the
thing is done.
II the wife Of a Turkoman asks his
permission to go out and he says "go,
without adding, come back again.
they are divorced. 5.
In Siberia, If man IL dissatisfied
with the most tri1ing acts Of his wife.
he tears cap or veil from her face
and that constitutes divorce.
| In Sian the first wife may be d.
yorced but not sold, as the others may
be. She may claim the first child.
The others belong to the husband
Among the Moors, II the wife does
/ not become the mother Of boy, she
may be divorced with the consent OF
| the tribe and can marry again.
In the Arctic region, man who
/ wants a divorce leaves home in anger
and doesEnot return for several days.
The wife takes the hint and Dc
parts.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
WALKS TEN MILES IN SLEEP

Mary Ruth Smith OF Clinton, Mo-.
eleyen-y ear-old daughter OF physi-
clan left her bed at Il o'clock and
clad only in her night robe and her
mothers coat, walked in her sleep
barefoot over ten miles of rough and
muddy country roads to the home of
her uncle, Walter Waugh, at Norris.
At daylight Mr.. Waugh found her
shiyering on his front porch. She was
unable to recall how she got there,
but said she dreamed Of wanting to
go to her uncle's home.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
SAVES CHILD BY BOLD LEAP

Leaping from a moving locomotive
into a stream at the side of the rail-
road track, Fireman Frank Ball, en-
ployed on an Erie switch engine at
Passaic, N. j., rescued four-year-old
Molly Roman, who had fallen into the
Dundee canal. While playing on the
bank the girl lost her balance and fell
in. Fireman Ball saw the you1lgster
fall into the water as his engine drew
near. He leaped into the stream and
with a few powerful strokes reached
the side of the child.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
All Tried to Get Through the Door a
the Same Time.

caught him on the ear and he retreat
ed.
Then the policemen began flank
movement on Heinie, but after con-
ference decided to abandon the cam
paign, because Of the prevalence OF
snakes on the floor. They telephoned
the owner of the store and withdrew
In good marching order.
They had not waited half an hour
before the keeper of the ape came
along. The police welcomed him
heartily. He went inside, the ape
recognized him and consented to re
turn to his cage. The snakes were
gathered up in box.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
HEIGHTENED By LlGalA|

George D. Pittman, 4 ralchs III
was struck by lightning ness "
Ariz., measured Ave feet slght II
IN height before death eng Y
afterward. His TertsoEae TiI
coupled BY the shock ltll Y
was singed at the back q " y I
where the bolt entered " ]
was broken and shoulders -
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The Fido mun 10 the latest armSul
affected by feminine caprice. De.
ceased pets do not, however, enter In.
20 the composition OF this elegant
&riae.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The man who married B girl under
school age and Is now obliged under a
asne to see that his wife goes to school
regularly, Is somewhat wiser since the
Gne was imposed, and perhaps he is
obliged ID get his own meals.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

MIX makes an admirable hair
tonic. according to the same prima
donna who lately discovered the s15..
ffl) lump Of anbergris Thus Is it
proved that grand opera is 9 terrible
rtratn on the inventive powers Of the
press agent
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
KILL THEIR MULE FOR DEER

Two young business men, John
Nichols and Gabriel Murphy, stalked
the brown mule they drove on q
hunting trip in the Greenhorn country,
Colorado, for three hours, then shot it
for i deer and were compelled to
tramp thirty-fve miles into Waisen-
hlIra
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
BOY ANGLER HOOKS ]

While fishing IN the n, y \ \ 1
near Reno, Ney. Nell II ! ! ~ 4
twelve, saw something salu,a 3 Q
river bed and BY def usa q y 4 i
brought up q 17-jeWelsa ass'' j
watch.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A German specialist claims that tel.
ephones make the modern man crazy.
Until he spoke. 1t was generally be.
aievsd the operators were responsible.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A contribution Of two cents was 70
oetyed by the washington conscience
FUN. Bet the fellow who sent 1t looRs
like II, too.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07
aspanish Gentleman stowaway..

New York. - Gabriel Saneheze,
spanish gentleman from Ecuador, ar.
rived in New York in the kitchen Of
the La Lorraine, peeling amurphys." "
He was found, hiding in the steerage
rs a stowaWay.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

AS suggestion to means Of pre-
venting 30 many drownings In the
United States navy. 1t might be q
good idea to teach the sailors how to
Wwim.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A New York man was fined for
swearing when tickled by young
woman's hat feathers. Wrong word
Sze evidently wasn't tickled.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The limit OF criticism Is reached
.vhan one woman says Of another:
.Why, she doesn't even make hef oND
bed
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Mathematics tell us the birthdays
"a nave been celebrating are FRAUDS
But everybody over 80 knew snas ~
ready.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Parisian beauties are to pc yei1ow
@g face instead of pink and white one
snoment, please. while We change COLE
IDlsxiona.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

= A Boston doctor says the women OF
Ahat town are not knockkneed. AND
he talks like man who knows where
of he speaks.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The woman conductor on Philadel.
Dhia's street cars Is called a cashier
by courtesy. This is, however, NO
ALAN on conductors In general.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

I Somebody Is advertising an appara'
kus for cooking over gas Jet, but ne
ss no friend to the woman who mas o
hail bedroom to let.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A California Judge refused alimony
no a woman who refuses to cook for
her spouse If she's still cooking So1
him. what need OF alimony?
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The largest stone statue In the
world la in Japan 1t Is forty-four feet
high, which probably accounts for the
TACT that 1t is still there.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Please note that the burglar VIC" =
somebody smashed In the lace ~A>A1 %
ala got away with ".
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A Colorado man had fifteen hives
robbed of honey at one time. He
must be cultivating the stingless W.
z4ety OF bee. 1T
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A Chicago bride ran away because
Iner husband would not buy her new
feather for her hat Trifles have be
fore now overturned empires.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A French expert seys that the fam.
NV is doomed within half-century
through the automobile. Wonder what
death rate he figures.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

~ the plan to employ policewVsomen
eor Chicago is carried out We na 800, -
u.eet tbs crooks to go to carry1ns nAe'
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Los Angeles complains OF scho =.
book famine, but the smah uus0
ehst city are bearing up bravery
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

they are going to make doliar o ans
smaller. The grocery nan es
Ia that little detail some time aso'
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

There will always be a difference
Between unlaundered money ana
tainted money, with plenty OF people
ready TO grab either.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A New York man had his name
nhanged from Arestad to N'gns4n eme
He certainly selected BIRD OF . nA1Do
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

A woman gets hat to 1T her haoS'
s,se A. that the man gets La proper
rsonal to the size OF the Dill.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

y1na,e Sam is short a,ooo'ooo sil,a'
THAT number LIS needeo " A
male population.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

INA latest thing in dances IL 'ne
..horna trot" And probably the next
thing TO 1t Is the nightmare
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Poison ivy Is full Of lovely coloI ~
ehe autumn, but no one snouau
~ home because of its loneliness
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

soms experts declare that ene Wv ".
Die skirt makes our Wo1aen 1850
hnsad. We are from Missouri
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

The peace serum does not Seem -
Asye taken In Europe.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1912-12-07

Nothing withstands the cold nreeS""
uss a. young girls white shoes
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1912-11-22
ROAD MATERIAL IS TESTED
Machines In Engineering Department
Of Kansas Agricultural College
Give Good Service.

When you ride over a good road or
paved street in your carriage or
motor car do you ever wonder how
ong that road or pavement will re-
main In good shape? Doesn't 1t seem
Is II 1t would be big waste of money
the road should prove to be of In.
:erior material and would have to be
replaced In a few years at an enor-
nous expense? II you are a tax payer
On paved street you have undoubt.
IDLY asked these questions.
Fortunately, the men who build
!hese streets and roads know Just how
.ong the material they use will last,
lust how much wear 1t will stand and
how long it will hold together. There
IS no guess work about such things
when properly done.
Several small, insignificant looking
machines were received, few days
ago, by the engineering department Of
the Kansas Agricultural college.
These machines mean much to road
builders and to tax payers. They are
mechanical contrivances with which
tests are made to show just how much
pressure may safely be put upon rock
to be used on road, and they deter
mine. also, approximately how long
the rock will last or. rather, how it
will wear.
A sample of the rock is powdered
and the powder is tested to discover
how well it will stick together-ce.
mentation.
In the laboratory of the department
is another machine which tests sand
for its building qualities. Not long
ago a test was made of all the differ
ent brands of sand sold in the state.
Different brands of cement are tested
in much the same way. Other road
materials are tested in this depart.
ment, and then the engineer can tell
easily what his road is going to be
when it Is finished. There is no guess
work about road building as one might
suppose.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1912-11-22
Buying Stock Swine.

Never buy an animal simply be.
cause he has pedigree, and because
he is on sale at low price. Pedi-
gree does not constitute merit. for
there are animals with pedigrees a
foot long which would ruin any herd
into which they were introduced. The
next class-the farmers pig-is that
which Is not good enough for the
breeder Of high-class stock; this ami
NAL may be bit coarse, and not up
to standard, but he is a good growthy
or a prolific sort, which the pork pro.
Queer will be glad to have. The next
kind includes the culls, runts and in.
ferior specimens, which should be
turned into butchers meat as soon as
possible; under no circumstances
whatever should they be used as
breeders.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1912-11-22
FINDS THUGS, BUT NOT KIN
David Williams, Back to Old Home A.
ter Eighteen Years, Vain Seeker,
10 Robbed.

Hazleton, Pa.-Upon his return to
Hazleton. the first time In eighteen
years, to hunt his parents. who had
believed him dead, David Williams.
middle-agsd man coming from
Omaha, was waylaid on one of the
streets of the city and robbed Of 345
n cash, together with some valuables
His assailants got away.
Williams was found unconscious by
number of boys, who took him to
, nearby house where he revived and
old the story.
The mans parents and az other re-
atives here had died during his long
.bsence.