The Newark journal. (Newark, Ark.) 1901-1959, 1912-09-20
JOY RIDERS SALT
RIVER EXCURSION
Socialists, B. Moose, Democrats
and Republicans Join i'm the
Gay-loomy Event


just nestled behind the Western hills
to give place to the sun which was just
beginning to peep over the oriental
horizon with its broad and softening
smile, Illuminating the whole elements
and painting all nature in a thousand
hues of beauty. From the diamond
trimmings of the golden foliage and
from the great calm that lowered over
the bosom of the mighty river, one
would never suspect that great event
was about to take place one that
would be indellibly written in memo
RVS book, never to be forgotten by
single passenger, tho his whiskers
dragged the ground and his visage
looked as if he were an own brother to
General Gloom.
While we were seated on the banks
of this very famous river, listening to
the clarion notes of hooking bird as
she sent up her Makers praise in pro-
fuse strains of unprecedented art, our
silence was abruptly broken by the
blast of whsle, piping loud and
shrill, which made known to us that
we were about to start on that famous
excursion up Salt river. The name of
the floating craft was Independence
County Socialism.
At the words of "all aboard each
walked sheepishly, but with an unfalt-
ering step, down the gang plank, and
stood at his post of duty.
Gul Pearee, a stauneh Democrat,
was iii the pilot house; Sherley in the
engine room; Gould the fireman; Cor.
don the captain; W. f. Bell the cook;
DR.. Brown the peace officer (how is
your tooth doctor? Have another
biscuit w. p. Detherow chaperon,
and yours truly the reporter, who took
his position in front on the free ferry
beat, which contained the sacred
corpse of the State Printing Plant
nicely wrapped in State Wide Prohi-
bition and sealed with the Grandfather
Clause.
There / sat, the guardian angel of
the whole sacred doings, with mind
full of dread, mingled with sort of
pleasure that sent tingling sensation
down my vertebra, and filled my
feeble anatomy with wonder.
I wondered If the old argosy would
ever return and if this was another ar
gonautic expedition in search of the
golden fleece, or would we be ship
wrecked and drift to some unknown is
land and find our way into the cave of
the one-eyed giant2 Then | thought of
old Xerxes and his ten thousand
Greeks, then of Napolean and his
Waterloo, and before | could think
again, | heard the sound of the for
ward bell, saw the waving of kerchiefs,
heard the exchange of Aureyoirs and
just as the anchor was weighed, Cul
Pearce sang bass solo, entitled "Of
all sad words of tongue or pen, the
saddest are these: cit might have
been" which we all joined in, in one
grand chorus, "What you going do
when the rent comes 'round?"
Dear reader, you ask, "Were the
socialistcondidates all thatwent up salt
river?' No, never; God forbid, There
were people of every description, ev-
cry race, every profession, every oc-
cupation and station in life and every
honest producer and every son of in
dustry was passenger on that ship.
As our voyage was in full sway, and
MIR. Crosser was guarding our little
Bull Moose, for fear Bro. Jackson's
old elephant might touch his velvet
antlers, looked and saw the crowd,
which | shall now describe.
First is bunch Of sky pilots; among
them is Clergyman who took his text
from the Sth chapter of the book of
Simpson and preached to a crowd of
laboring men, telling them to have
faith and pray for better times. He
told them that the reason God did not
prosper them, was that God was
afraid to, because they might forget
Him. Well they prayed for a crib of
corn and barrel OF pepper, ETC., but
they never got it. Then the preacher
told them that it was not Gods will.
Gosh, I'll just have to larfe.
Next were the poor old school teach
ers who didn't have any scholars, be-
cause they were helping Paw and Nav
pay off the mortgage. There were the
doctors, clerks, engineers, day labor
ers and the little 2x4 capitalistic mer-
chants that Seers and Sawbuck had
not yet swallowed.
There sat those sturdy old farmers,
and low-down renters the noblest work
of all Gods ereationl who go hungry
in order that others may live, who pays