davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

A surgical operation has just
been found necessary to recover
a lot OF teaspoons which dis
appeared one at a time from a
ward of the Eastern Maine In
sane Hospital, in Bangor. When
the mystery was solved b the
discovery that one of the patients
was swallowing the missing arti-
cles, Drs. w. C. Mason and E. 3.
Sanger recovered from the man )
stomach nineteen teaspoons.
Seventeen of them belonged to
the hospital and two had pre-
sumably been swallowed before
the man was committed.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
BREAKING IT GENTLY.

"Dickie, I'm awfully sorry you use
tobacco. l don't like 1t, and mamma
simply loathes 1t. VIII you stop wher
we are married?"
Isn't that asking a lot, dearie? ?
asked Dick.
II wouldn't care for myself" an
swered the girl, but you know Il
makes mamma deathly sick"
'Well, then" he promised. cheer
fully. ''I'll tell you what I'll do. II
never smoke when your mamma /!
with U.S."
She threw her arms around him
Darling" she muttered, that's 81
good Of you! l was afraid you'd In
sist on smoking once In a while aftel
we were married"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Fork and Plate Conversation

One whose ear has been train
ed to read intelligently the click
of telegraph instrument some
times put this training to test
under strange conditions. An in
stance, which resulted in en-
barrassment, apologies, and final
ly in pleasant ao quaintanceship
among the persons concerned, is
told by certain Ohio farmer
who spent his early years in the
employ of the Western Union
Telegraph Company.
Some years after impaired
health had driven him from the
telegraph-cffice to the farm, he
and his wife were spending a
short vacation in the South.
While they were dining in a
hotel in Memphis, two young
men entered and seated them
selves at the same table with the
couple from the West,
After survey of the strangers,
,ne the youths took up his fork.
and tapping it in an apparently
careless way against the edge OF
his plate, spelled out in the
Morse code:
do you think they are bride
and groom?"
Yes, surely" raped his COM
panion. lust watch how soft
they are"
Immediately, to the dismay of
the young men, the fork of the
supposed bridegroom joined in
the conversation. With rapidity
it tapped out:
Gentlemen, you are mistaken.
We have been married five years,
and have three children"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

Earl Stone, breakman on a
train running between Chicago
and Libertyville, on Wednesday
night held in his hands an Old
shoe box containing S25, 900 with
out being aware of its contents.
The box had been left on the
train at Morton Grave by Her
bert Schoenberg. Before the
train departed Schoenberg DASH
ed into the car and asked Stone
if he had seen the box. It was
handed to Schoenberg, who ex-
planned to the breakman that it
contained money for starting a
new bank. Stone was rewarded
with one dollar.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Children Cry
FOR FLETcHER'S
Q a STo RIA

A man in Philadelphia who
some years ago befriended a
tramp to the extent of one dollar
has been left a fol- tune by the
grateful nomad. But this need
not cause rush of sympathetic
benefacfors towards the Wan
dering Willie Paternity under the
delusion that this case is the rule
and not the exception.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Revival.

Uncle Ezra-Did you attend any re-
ligious services In New York;"
Uncle Eben-Yep. l was at what
they called a revival of somebody's
at one of the theaters, and believe me,
Ezry, judgin' by some of the dancing
/ saw in that place. them city people
do get religion somethin' flerce."-
Puck
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

The demons of the swamp are mos
quitoes. AS they sting they put dead
ly malaria germs in the blood. Then
follow the icy chills and the fires of
fever. The appetite flies and the
strength fails; also malaria often
paves the way for deadly typhoid.
But Electric Bitters kill and cast out
the malaria germs from the blood;
give you fine appetite and reLew
your strength. AFTER long suffer-
ing" wrote VIM. Fretwell, of Lucama
N. c., three bottles drove all the
m alaria from my system. and l have
had good he alth ever SINCE" Best for
all stomach, liver and kidney ills.
SOC at Walton & Shoots.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

A woman in Pennsylvania is a
grandmother at the age of thirty
three, and a woman in Connecti-
cut has just taken her first auto
mobile ride at the age of ninety
two. Women in this feminist
era are beating the record at
both ends of the age limit.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

Is there anything in all CHS world
that is of more Importance to you
than good digestion? Food must be
eaten to sustain life snd must he di-
gested and converted into blood.
When the digestion fails the whole
body suffers. Cbamberlain's Tablets
are rational aud reliable cure for
indigestion. They increase the flow,
of bile, purify the blood, strengthen
the stomach. and tone up the whole
digestive apparatus to natural and
healthy action. For sale by all deal
ers.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

Three Italian women were
gathering greens on farm at
Kingmort, near Fairmont, w.
Va. when Jennings Christ,
owner of the farm, became en-
ragged because they were on his
land and shot them. Christ was
held for the grand jury. He
claims that the gun he used was
a very small one. The women'S
wounds are not serious.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Up 70 Date.

HAS your son brought back any
business methods from London?"
"Oh, yes. He thinks we ought to
serve teas afternoons and that all
stenographers ought to be blondes" =
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
hIa Par,.

He--So young March and his father
are carrying on the business!
She-Yes. The old man runs the
business. while young March does the
carrying on.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

'How do you explain the peculiar
actions Of that suffragette?'
There's q man in the case"
"But she's married"
Two men."-Judge.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Foresight.

How is it you were SO successful
| with your catch in the fishing party
| when the rest couldn't get thing?
Il invited the deaf and dumb girl IN
| tina marty to go with me-"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Second Thought.

Baker-Whenever see anything
costly l want to buy it for my wife.
Barker-Prodigal. aren't you?
Baker-Oh. no; always control the
impulse.-Harper's Bazaar.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Truly Expsrt.

rs your chauffeur an expert!"
yes. indeed" replied Mr.. Chuggins.
HE can explain in . most interesting
way exactly why the car isn't running
most Of the time
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Trying.

Mrs. Fiatt-Alice cannot seem to
master that dif'lcult piece of music.
She's been trying all the afternoon.
Mrs. Nextdoor-Yes. Indeed. she
has been.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Explained.

I'm all my stories, look into my
heart and write"
"Humph! The stories might DO
more ineligible II you looked into
your head first"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

A New York butcher has been
sent to Jail for a particularly
mean method of cheating. 1t
was his practice when selling
poultry to weigh it with lead
sinker concealed inside, the sinker
being provided with a string by
which he pulled it out before
handing over the bird to the Gus
toner. But a sharp customer
seized his bird before the butcher
TODD it from the scale to wrap 1t
up, and, seeing the string, pulled
it out and found the sinker and
had the law" on the butcher.
On investigation other similarly
loaded poultry was found in the
shop.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Nat eIattarino

Does death end allT asked the
solemn boarder.
mot for . week or SO In case of q
turkey" answered the cheerful
boarder.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Xnu raka xnur cholo.

Newrich-How far back does my
family run?
Genealogist-That's for you to de-
eide. Well 60 ~ far back - you
wish TO pay for, sir.-Judge.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
HI O. lie K Y
THE VIRGINIA MAIL ORDER 70.

OF STAUNTON, VIRGINIA.
Are Agents for one of the most i'm.
portant Hosiery Mills in the South
and as such can sell
SOCKS AND STOCKINGS
by mail cheaper and better than most
retailers.
SEE OUR PRICES.
MEMS SOCKS
Two pairs Mems Mercerized Cotton
Socks, reinforced at heel and e with
liren thread. % cents
Two pairs Silk Socks, reinforce Ell
at heel and toe, mercerize6 tops, 40c
Two pairs Pure japanese SIX
Socks. reinforced at heel and toe,
genuine Pure Silk, IS cents.
WOMEN'S STOCKINGS
Two pairs Real Maco Cotton Stock
ings, reinforced at heel and toe with
linen thread, % cents.
Two pairs Mercerized Cotton Stock
ings, reinforced at heel and toe.
Two pairs Real Japanse Silk Stock
ings, reinforced at heel and toe. gar
ter tops, so cents.
THESE PRICES INCLUDE POSTAGE
Two pairs of Socks and four-in- hand
Tie to match for 30 cents, by mall
postpaid.
You can't get ''stung at these pr'ceS
Send US a trial order and see for
yourself.
THE VIRGINIA NAH ORDER co j..
dec-5-6m Staunton, Virginia.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Poultry Notes

Never send a fowl to market
that has a full crop.
Ventilation is more important
than heat in the poultry house.
See that your incubators and
brooders are in good condition
now.
Ifyou notice symptoms OF cod
among your fowls, put coal-oil in
the drinking water.
If you buy eggs that are ship
ped by express do not set until
they have rested "a yours.
It is doing things at tho right
time and never neglecting the
flock for a single day that brings
success.
One of the success secrets IN
the poultry business is to keep
stock Young. The pullet year
is the best producing year in a
chickens life.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Very Awkward.

you made a mistake in your pa
per-" said the indignant man, enter
ing the editorial sanctum. Il was one
Of the competitors at the athletic
match yesterday. and you have call
id me the well-known lightweight
champion"
We'll, aren't your" said the ed
itor.
mo, I'm nothing of the kind; and
it's COMPOUNDED awkward. because,
you see, I'm coal merchant"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

Sick headache results from disor-
dered condition of the stomach, and
can be cured by the use of Chamber
lain's Stomach and Liver Tablets
Try it. For sale by all dealers.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

"A baby Is an uncanny sort Of
thing"
How can y0a say s0f@
well isn't Il crseRgT
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Encore

Encore.
what on earth d'you keep clapping
for? That last singer was awful"
II know; but l liked the style Of
her clothes, and want to have an
other look at them."-London Opinion.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
PERHAPS,

FeFnapS.
II think" said Congressman Suggs-
ley. rising to point of order, Il
scent a mares nest in this thing"
"Oh, WE'LL" replied the speaker,
that's a horse of another color
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Useful at Last.

Hubby, you have lock Of my hair
haven't your"
Next to my heart"
See II you can match it In some
puts when you go downtown"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
Easily Understood.

do you believe money talks?"
eyes"
what does it say?"
ITO the average person it says
Spend me-"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

A Chicago man says ragtime
is as dangerous as whisky. And
Just as disagreable to take.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
A Dear Girl.

my love for you is more" he said.
Than any tongue could utter;
In fact I may in candor say
You're worth your weight in butter"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
The New China.

The New China.
rhe dragon waited long before
He gan to wake;
But he will now, his slumbers Ger,
Some records break.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
REST AND HEALTH 70 MOTHER AND eaIlD.

MRS. wrNsLow's SOOTHING SYRUP has been
used for over SIXTY YEARS by MILLIONS g
MOTHERS for their CHILDREN WHILh
TEETHIN0, with PERFECT SUCCESS. 4
SOOTHES the CHILD SOFTENS the GUNS
AILAYS all PAIN; CURES WIND COLO, ana
= tie bes remedy 1M DIARR46A. Il q ~
enluneay hnrmlesa De SURE and aak ~ ~Mn
Olnal6w.s 0ouahing Syrup and tn11e 1DAeho
~ Tu1v-oDo1GlDo be1tAA 4
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

She had just finished reading
Edward Everett Hale's The
Man Without a Country" and
as she laid it down she sighed
and said:
Il can not imagine anything
worse than a man without a
country"
"Oh, cam" said her friend
why, what?"
"A coantry without a man."
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10
flow cold YOUR nose is !"

How cold your nose is y
These words came from the
daughter of the house, who was
sitting in the parlor with her
beau.
rs Towser in the parlor
again?" demanded her mother
from the next room.
There was a long pause.
mo, mother: Towser isn't IN
the parlor." And then silence
resumed its reign.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

Deceived.
How brightly beams the sun without
The skies above are blue.
We're In a mood to look about
And see II spring Is due.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1912-05-10

On a cold morning the motor
truck never has a frosted lit
thrust into its mouth.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26
A BORN DEBATER
College Professor at First

George r. Kirkpatrick, who will speak
at the Chnuiauqua in behalf of Socialism
in oppo .itiau 10 Hon William H. Berry
is college graduate, and has been u
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26
People Tell Each Other At,ont Good Things.

Twenty years ago few people in this world
knew OF such preparation as Powder for
the Feet. To-day after the genuine merit Of
Aliens Foot Ease has been told year after
year by one gratiGed person TO another, there
are millions abroad and in this country who
would AZ soon go without dentifrice az with
out the daily use OF Aliens Foot Ease. ID
Is a clearly, wholesome, healing antispetic
powder to be shaken into the shoes which
has given rest and comfort to tired and ach-
ing feet in all parts of the. world. II cures
while you walk. Over 10000 testimonials of
cures Of smarting, swollen, tender perspirinR
feet. IL prevents friction and wear OF the
stockings and viii save in yourstocking bill
ten times its cost each year limitations pay
the dealer a larger profit otherwise you
would never be offered substitute when you
ask for Aliens Foot Ease, the original anti
septic powder for the feet. 1t gives a restful-
ness and a sprlngy feeling that makes you
forget you have feet Aliens Foot Ease is
the greatest comfort discovery Of the age and
so easy TO nse. IL prevents soreness, blisters
or putting. Don't go on your vacation with
out package OF Aliens foot-Ease. Sold
everywhere, CSC DON'T accept ana substitute.
sample sent FREE Address, Allen s. Ohm
ted, lie Roy, N Y
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26

Ask for and insist ON having Lam
bertvilIe Pnffs.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26

The manufacturers of that justly famous
Kidney and Liver medicine, DR.. David Ken
nedy's Favorite Remedy. offer readers of
this paper a sample bottle and pamphlet
of valuable medical advice absolutely free.
OF course thisinvolves enormous expense
to the manufacturers, but THEY have received
SO many grateful letters from those who
have been benefited and cured of the yari-
GUS diseases of the kidneys and liver, and
associated diseases, such as bladder and
blood troubles, rheumatism, dyspepsia and
chronic constipation, and all weaknesses
peculiar to women, that they willingly send
sample bottles to all sufferers. Write to-
day for free sample bottle, or get large
bottle of your druggist. Address DR..
David Kennedy Co., Rondout, N. Y.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26
Her Interpretation.

She was bright girl and her es-
cort. who was also her intended, was
delighted to find how quickly she
grasped the points of the game, She
got on so well that he yentured
light witticism on the subject
Baseball reminds me OF the house
hold" he remarked; there's the plate,
the batter, the fowls, the flies, etc
And it reminds me OF marriage
she retorted; first the diamond where
they are engaged, then the struggles
and the hits, then the men going out
and finally, the difficulty they have II
getting home"
And he sat and thought and
thought.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26

first cornet in our municipal band a
year later | was made eopyist,
:" In another year | was engaged as
solo cornet in the band after the leader
had told me to study cornet because
would make my fame by it. At eighteen
years of age | enlisted in the army and
played in the regiment band as sole
cornet. In the old country solo eornet
is not looked upon MS he is here. He has
fame and. respect there. A few years
later | was directing the bands in the
Fifty fifth aud Sixty-third Regiments
Then came to America so | could be
come known here
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26
A MUSIC STAND
AT -FOUR
sCiricillo Biographed by Him
self

ct like TO direct" says the band
leader, Salvatore Ciricillo. Since | was
a little boy | always wanted to lead
band. When / was little fellow -four
years old, in Genoa, Italy, | liked music
so much that | used to follow the band
around the streets every time il played.
They had no music stands in those days.
and asked boys to hold their music for
them. was always one OF those boys,
and when came home late my four
brothers would whip me. | began my
band career by playing the cornet. When
was eleven years old was playing
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1912-07-26

college professor Of Economics and Soci.
ology. In these subjects he did two
years post graduate work at Vanderbilt
University and University Of Chicago be
fore taking up the profession Of Z
teacher. Remaining in college work 70
four years, Nlr. Kirkpatrick was grndu
ally drawn into the field Of lecture an,
debate, for which he is well fitted bcio,
logical aud original. aud quick 10 seen
= iallacy in an opponent's argument
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1912-04-03
THE SUNDAY MEETINGS.

To The Forum: Shall I. one of the
most conservative Of conservatives
one who had always laid great stress
on pulpit reverence and propriety-
shall even such a one as ], instead of
hesitating, come and cordially Join In
and pray for the meetings soon to be-
gin in Fargo under the noted evangeI-
list? Yea, doubtless, that is just the
right thing to do. And why? Well,
primarily and chiefly because God
works with MI. Sunday and through
him marvelously. This fact is indis-
putable. Nothing is more evident.
He is wonderfully blest in doing good.
To this hundreds of reputable chris
tan people in every city where he has
ever held meetings will testify.
And he is SO successful because. as
Just stated, God helps him. God works
with and through him, and I, for one,
do not wish to be on the opposite side
from God, my Heavenly Father. II is
very certain the devil is against God.
and ! don't wish to be ever in the com
pany with the great enemy of souls.
So, however much / may regret Mr..
Sundays admitted imperfections-his
at times rasping speech and undesira-
BILE ways-yet because God is with him.
richly blessing and using him, / feel
that I should not hold back from work
ing with God. 1t is surely a duty and
a privilege thus to do.
Then, as to i-mperfections, who Ia
perfect? Every minister of the gospel,
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1912-04-03
BEAUTIFUL HAIR
AT SMALL COST
A SIMPLE REMEDY BEAuTIFIEs
THE HAIR, CURES DANDRuFF,
STOPS FALLING HAIR.

What a pity 1t is to see so many
people with thin, wispy hair. faded or
streaked with gray, and realize thar
most Of these people might have soft,
glossy, abundant hair OF beautiful color
and iustre IL they would but use the
proper treatment. There Isl no neces-
sity for gray hair under sixty-fve
years Of age, and there is no excuse
for anyone, young or old. having thin,
struggling hair, either full of dandruff
or heavy and AMI smelling with ex-
cessive oil.
You can bring back the natural color
OF your hair in a few days and forever
rid yourself Of any dandruf and loose
hairs, n make Your hair grow strong
and beautiful by using Wyeth's Sage
and Sulphur Hair Remedy. Fol gener-
atoms nm garden Sage has been
used for restoring and preserving he
color OF the hair, and Sulphur is rec
ognized BY Scalp Specialists as being
excellent for treatment Of hair and
scalp troubles.
IL you are troubled with dandrnff
or itching scalp, or ii your hair is
losing its color or coming out. yet q
nifty cent bottle Of Wyeth's Sage ana
sulphur from your druggist, and notice
the improvement in the appearance OF
your hair after d few days treatment.
Special agent. Fout & Porterield, s1
broadway s
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1912-04-03
DO YOU KNOW

That on Aug. 81, 1888, Providence
defeated Philadelphia % to O?
That Pitcher George Van Haltern
sent sixteen batters to first on balls
when Boston played Chicago back in
1887?
That the rule compelling base run
ners to touch every base was made in
1867?
That Clarence Beaumont made six
hits in six times at bat with the Pitts
burg in 1899?
That Buck freeman made twenty
five home runs for the Washington
club IN the season of 1899?
That Terry. Gillian n Gumbert II
P%ittsburg walked twenty-four men in
one game between Pittsburg and Bos-
ton in 1898?
That H. e. Frederickson claims he
can lift nine pool balls with one hand ?
That Cassasa and Northbridge. al
Celtic park, New York, ran 220 yards
in a three-legged race in q lis sec
onds?
That A. Forester of Toronto, Ont,
ran 100 yards backward in IA seconds
in 1888?
That ]. H. Clark of New York COW
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1912-04-03
IN the World of Sport
MAKE CHANGES
in BASKETBALL

New York, April s.-The college
basketball rules committee ended IT'S
annual two-day session here, coming
to the conclusion that Notwithstanding
much criticism the present rules need
no fundamental changes. The real
trouble, 1t was declared, lay in the
failure Of certain teams to obey the
rules. The eastern intercollegiate
league was pointed out as a "conspicu-
offender in this respect" and a
resolution was adopted calling upon
the teams to adhere strictly to the
rules thereafter.
A few changes were made designed
mainly to make the game faster and
less rough. 1t was decided to give
the players but ten seconds for a free
try for the basket after the referee
had placed the ball on the foul mark,
which is expected to eliminate much