davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
o. The -
Scrap Book
Won by More Than a Hair.


Curtis Guild. former governor of Mas
sachusetts. was once asked for the fun
niest story he ever heard. This is the
Etory he told: An Irishman and
Jew were discussing the great men
who had belonged to each race and. as
may be expected. got into heated ar
gument. Finally the lrishman said:
'Ikey, listen. For livery great Jew ye
can name ye may pull out one of ME
whiskers, an for livery great lrishman
/ can name I'll pull one OF yours. Is
it a goY key consented. and Pat
reached over, got hold Of whisker.
said Robert Emmett and pulled
Moses! said Ikey and pulled one Of
Pats tenderest. Dan O'Connell.' said
Pat and took another. Abraham said
Ikey, helping himself again. Patrick
Henry returned Pat with a vicious
yank. The twelve apostles. said lkey.
taking a handful OF whiskers. Pat
emitted roar OF pain. grasped keys
beard with both hands and yelled.
The Ancient Order OF Hiberniansr
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Just Like tho Navy.

At Fort Monroe some time ago.
where one of the vessels of the navy
was temporarily awaiting orders, a
delegation of army officers stationed
at the fort came aboard. There is a
set naval regulation that nothing can
be so on board ship until the com
manding officer orders it. While the
army party were looking over the ship
II o'clock arrived. A junior officer ap-
preached the captain and said, with
salute. 1T is ~ o'clock. sir" make il
So" responded the captain, and eight
bells were struck. The army officers
suspected that the navy men wanted
them to ask some questions and get
sold or that this was bit of foolery
got up TO joke the land warriors. Some
time after party of the army officers
Invited tin, officers of the warship to
dine with them. The dinner was pro-
crossing when a lieutenant entered
and. saluting the senior officer present.
said grayely, Colonel the majors
blind horse is dead" make It So" re-
spunded the colonel. with the greatest
gravity, and the dinner proceeded.
Nothing was said at the time, but the
aavy officers tell the story.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

''The wolves we're pp,u u.s." he RI
lated to the girl he was trying TO Ia.
press. Their bowling penetrated To
our very Glarrow. We Ted for our
lives. But each second we knew that
the ravenous pack was gaining on ua.
Closer, closer-at last they were 80
close that we could feel their muzz'pS
against our legs. so that
"Ah,' sighed the lady, greatly re.
lieved. how glad you must have been
that they had their mu2zles onr-Cht.
cRgo Post.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
How to Hang Curtains.

The mistake Is too often made of
hanging white curtains the full width
of the window and from the top to the
floor, says Suburban Life for Decem-
ber. This treatment is unsuitable ex-
cept in very dainty or elaborate rooms
The mass Of white is usually distract
ing and destroys the harmony of the
room. Perhaps the most effective
treatment Is to let the curtains hang
straight at the sides OF the window,
covering the woodwork. and have Il
plated valance across the top. Cur
tains made in this way keep out very
little light and give a pretty, broad eff
feet to window. The curtains may
either hang to the floor or stop at the
sill. If the curtains are dark and long.
straight lines seem called for they
should reach to the floor. but when in
doubt stop at the sill.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
How TO Wash Cotton Goods.

Cotton blankets are washed differ
emily from those made of wool. Soap
them well with laundry soap. fold and
allow them to soak in tepid water.
Wash them In an hour or so and place
in a boiler OF hot suds to steam. not
boil. Rinse in several waters. Use ii
very little buing and dry them double
on the line. Press dry on the wrong
side. Quite the contrary is the proc
eSs Of washing wooden. for hot water
cannot be- used on them. Dainty
quilts, liable to fade. should first be
sonked In tub of cold water contain
ing half cupful Of turpentin to set
the color.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
The Dancer SiupaI.

with lowered lids my Mary's eyes
Work havoc In my timid heart.
In vain my harried spirit tries
To turn aside that fatal dart.
/ know the weakness of my will
And yet bewitchcd must stay until
i make OF all a full surrender,
As not for worlds would | offend hor
do not mind her open gaze.
For that Is clear of all deceit
Whoeer is skilled in womans ways
Knows when they're seeking means
to cheat
It's when she keeps her eyes half closed
As II she slept a bit or dozed
That have found much cause to fear
For then know my fall is near
Collector.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Numbered Guests.

Guests at some of the health resorts
in Europe are numbered" when they
arrive and register at hotel or pen
sion" This is done SO that at the end
of the season the authorities may know
for advertising purposes-just how
many guests have been entertained
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
No Doubt About II.

We are told that most Of the verses
in a recent book of poems were writ
ten Immediately after the authors
thirty day fast. Thirty day fast! He
surely must be n poet! 49, Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
How 10 Check Flow Of sIood

In case OF an accident. when the flow
OF blood from wound can't be stop
ped. IN application Of equal parts OF
-four and sugar mixed wei will effer
tually check the dow until the arrival
of a physician.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Tho Difference,

The genius merely does what you
Had done could you have found the way.
Although hia method may be new.
The need has been since Adams day.
The marvel that excites the king
May set the pauper wondering.
The poet merely says the thing
That you have thought but could not say.
Chicago Record Herald.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Good Old DAYS!

There are TWO articles which once
bulked large in small boys life that
he never comes in contact with any
more, since states are now only placed
on roofs instead of shingles. - ST.
Louis Globe Democrat.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Broke

First Omaha Man Qn surprise)-
What! Back already? Why, thought
you were going to see Europe?
Second Omaha Man (cheerfullyl-So
did |, but II seems that New York
saw me first-Puck.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

She with newspaperl-Another cy.
clone out west. It has swept dozens
Of farms clear Of everything
He - I'll bet the mortgages didn't
bulge an inch. Boston Transcript
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Only this to tell:
His Relatives.

Chief No Shirt Of Oregon has appeal
ed to the authorities on the grounds
that he is friendless. Chief No Shirt
overlooks his large and growing fam
lily of cousins-the One Shirt family
who are willing to tender assistance
Buffalo News.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Firearms In Siam.

Magazine rifles and automatic pis
tolls may not be imported into Siam
unless they are for the personal use
of some European dwelling in the
country. When he leaves the country
he is required by the government to
account for the weapon.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
A Warming.

A Warning.
"Dr. Spillet and | were out together
today, and he asked me to have
drink ON him"
"Never accept that from a doctor,
man"
"Why notf'
Because don't you know that when
doctor treats you he always sends
you the Baltimore American
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Content.
SOntcnt.
Fellers doin' we'll
nj flA 1T

Feller's doin we'll
Doin' mighty we'll
When he's got an appetite an lots O. corn
to sell.
His soul he can deliver,
No weather'll maze him shiver.
When he has a cotton field to give hira
lots o. kivver.
Only this to tell:
He's doin' mighty we'll
With corn to make the hoecake an cotton
for to sell.
Atlanta Constitution.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
A Comeback,

81 intended to give Wombat a little
friendly advice this morning."
And why didn't you?
"Why. he started to tell me how to
run my affairs, and that's something
/ tolerate from no man."-Kansas City
Journal,
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Lives of great men all remind us
That they had no nowcry bed
with bouquets they weren't boubsrded
Until after thsy were dead
New York Commercial Adysrtissr
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Tho teacher sighed, II would that
In discipline might e'er app zach
The fond obedience rendered ly
Ny pupils TO the football coach!"
Washington Star
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
First Love.

But Margaret Ellington Frohman Bowes
Wearied II seems, Of repairing hose
And now she is back in the world Of shows
Margaret Ellington Frohman Bowes,
New York Mall
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

The dealer when he stands upon the scales
to weigh his hay
Is doing nothing wrong. OF course. It's
just his little weigh
Dallas News
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Choly-The dentist said had q
large cavity that needed filling.
Mabel-Did he recommend any spe-
cial course Of study y?-Toledo Blade.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

The farmer surely ought to view
This life as something OF hit
Since everything the statesmen do
They vow Is for his benefit.
Washington Star.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Rlobbs-scribbler' poetry strikes me
% as being rather clumsy.
Slobbs-Clumsy? Why, 1t positively
trips over its own feet.-Philadelphi
Record.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

II seems the automobile cranks have very
deeply sinned.
Think Of their wasting gasoline when they
can burn the wind!
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
The Trial Course,

giving you lot of fish this week. old
man." said the genial host as they sat
down TO dinner. THE fact is. my
wife has got hold OF what sounds like
a really capital device for removing
a fishbone stuck in the throat and we
want to see II it works."-Tit Bits.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Oh, dazzling chrysanthemum.
You are an autumn dream!
In pink and white and gold you come
Through natures endless scheme.
And when l have to skip my lunch,
monday sacrifice,
1t is to you l gladly turn.
OF posies fresh and nice.
1t is to you | gladly turn,
So scintillating fair.
For roses cost more than earn,
And violets are rare
They'd put my income on tho bum.
So you. oh. you. chrysanthemum!
Chicago News
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Mary had little limb,
And for that very reason
She never vrntured in the swim
Throughout the bathing season.
New York Commercial Advertiser.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

"That last time I saw your husband
he was trying to stop smoking. Has
he stopped?'
II don't know. You know that he
Is d."-Philadelphia Times.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

The sphinx propounded a riddle
How can the other man with your
income afford an auto?" she asked.
Herewith she felt she had them
gro oveled-New York Sun.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

"Dld the automobile run over your
foot?"
NO" answered the man who had
yelled, "but thought it was going to
strike my corr" Buffalo Express.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

"And where did you spend your two
weeksT
Sitting in hotel bnrber's chair.
The barber was persuasive and let
him give me his entire list "-Pittsburs
Post
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Police In Ireland.
Police in Ireland are armed with
rife, sword and pistol.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

A hero brave. a maiden fair.
A villain schooled to graceful ease.
A fight, rescue planned with care
The novels done. One dollar. please.
washington Star.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Monotonous.

Monotonous.
Same old winter, same old fall.
Same old worry through 1t all.
Same old snow. same old walk,
Same old line of slushy talk.
Same old furnace, same old coal.
Same old Tom and Jerry bowl.
Same old cold, same old wheeze.
Same old case of cough and sneeze.
Same old cure, same old rye,
Same old bottle on the sly.
Same old story, same old tale.
Same old line of zero wall
Spokane Spokesman Review.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

A countryman who had been hen.
pecked all his life was about to die.
His wife felt it her duty to offer him
such consolation as she might and
said. "John. you are about TO go, but
will follow you" 81 suppose 90,
Mandy" said the old man meekly,
but so far as am concerned you
don't need to be in any hurry sboui
it."-Bufralo Enquirer.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

The night has a thousand eyes
And the day but one,
Which perhaps is the reason night
Sees so much fun
Life
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
Gloomv Then,

Gloomy Then.
Little songs OF Gladness
Are not worth a pin
When the bill collector
Calls and finds you in.
Detroit Free Press.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

Thick.
Towne-Yes, l met Britton in Lon
don and shook hands with him.
Browne-Why, you just told me you
never saw him before.
Towne-I didn't see him. i was in
troduced to him in a fog.-Catholic
Standard and Times.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02
From One Who Was There.

From One Who Was There.
Lonesome Ia that ancient play
Hamlet" with tho Dane away
Lonesome, too tho nations cause
Minus Donln and McGraws.
But the loneliest thing on earth
Grab II from this pllnth OF mirth--
Is a straight without jack
Or the pink that spoils "all black"
II will follow you to the ends of the
earth" he exclaimed.
But" she replied, IL am only going
as far as the next soda water foun-
tain"
Whereupon he took the hint and led
the way.-Milwaukee Sentinel.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-02-02

When you embrace 4 damssI shy
II seems a sin
To got all lacerated by
A pesky pin.
Louisville Courier Journal
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30
4 CH|LD'S WASTE.
CL0GCED BOWELS
Makes it cross, peevish,
restless and feverish. If
tongue is coated give
Syrup of Figs"

Children dearly love 20 take delicious
syrup of Figs and nothing else cleans
and regulates their tender little stOm-
achs, liver and 80 feet Of bowels so
promptly and thoroughly.
Children get bilious and COnStipated
just like grOWu-ups. Then they get
sick, the tongue is coated, stomach sour,
breath bad; they don't eat or rest well;
they become feveri~h. cross, irritable
and don't want to play Listen. Moth
ers-for your chIId's sake don't force
The little one to swallow nauseating
castor oil, violent CalomeI or harsh irTi-
tantS Ike CathartiC pills. teaspoon
full OF Syrup of Figs will have your
child smiling and happy again in just a
few hours Syrup of Figs viii gently
clean sWceten and regulate the stom-
ach, make the liver active and move on
and out Of the bowels all the consti-
pated matter, the sour bile, the foul,
ClOggcd-up waste and pOisOns, without
causing cramps or gripping.
With Syrup Of Figs you are not drug
ging or injuring your children. BEING
composed entirely of luscious figs, SEN
ma and aromatiCs it can not be harm
full. Fun directions for children Of all
/ ages and for EroWn-uDs plainly printed
on the package.
ASK your druggist for the fun name.
syrup of Figs and Elixir of SIENNA, -
prepared by the California Fig Syrup
Co This is the delicious tasting gen
uine old reliable. Refuse anything else
offered CAdvt)
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30
Exploring Smoke Befogged City by TorchHght
IN DARKEST ATLAN7A

Eleven delegates to next weeks gas
convention stepped out of their Pull
mans at the station early today and
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30

\ flashliqht taken
"a WHITEHALL street
at 10 O'Clock this
morning, showing a
part Of the Great
Black Way,
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30


the porter.
I h o Il gnt YOU
said We got IN al
8 a. m they pro
tested W ny are
you dumping us
out at mlGnlgutF
This amt ma
night, boss re
turned the porter
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30

y Equitable Building
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30

Both Phones 500
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-11-30

cigars But instead Of the scent of to-
bacco. there was the stencil Of soft coal
Can't See Skyscr apers.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1912-03-22
QUAINT OLD TOWNS
q
Rotnerburg in Germany Still a
Medieval Village.
Remarkable Trousseau of Bride at
schwaIm Valley Weddng-Popu.
lace Are Happy and Contcnted
With Their Lot.

I.onlon.-There are still corners of
Europe that are not hackneyed-that
are practically unvisited by tourists
despite the revolution the motor car
has wrought. These quaint places, of
course, become fewer each year, but
every now and then the illustrated
newspapers of this and other coun-
tries print photographs of some
strange ancient town or Of some curl
Gus people that remain much as they
were 800 or 400 years ago.
Such a place is Citta Vecchia, the
ancient capital Of Malta, which has re-
NAMED almost untouched since the
knights of Malta ruled the island. An
other such town is Rothenburg, in Ba-
varia, which, although it is not quite
unknown to tourists, contains no mod
ern buildings, while it's streets are
still lighted by lanterns swung across
them on chains.
The Sphere this week contains an
account of wedding in the Schwalm
valley, another spot that has been al
lowed to remain as it was before mod.
ernity swept away the picturesqueness
from the greater part Of the civilized
world. The valley is in western Ger
many, the Schwalm passing through
the beautifully situated little town of
Treysa, which is on the Main-Weser
railway.
The people of the Schwalm valley
belong to very robust and tenacious
race. They are very thrifty, extreme
ly contented with their manner of life,
and indefatigably Industrious, always
struggling to wrest a living by hard
work from the soil. In time Of waf
the Schwalmer proved themselye,
clever soldiers, capable of enduring
great fatigue and hardship. The
Schwalmer loves his home and if his
business has taken him into other
lands he always returns to his native
place.
When a young man needs a wife he
always chooses her from among the
maidens of the valley.
The evening before the wedding the
bridal pair go with some witnesses to
the village council and the clergyman,
the bride wearing for the last time her
girlish red cap, red corners, and red
ornaments.
On the wedding morning the bride
is awake early. At about quarter to
eight she is already dressed in her
fullest wedding attire. She sits, look
ing very patient and dignified. putting
on her head the bridal crown. It Is
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1912-03-22

trimmed with twenty-five rows of red,
gray and silver ribbons, while the
front is adorned with rosemary, glass
balls and flowers. The bride also
wears an elaborate stomacher en-
broidered in gold and silver. The
bridal outfit includes fifteen petticoats,
a cloth skirt, satin pinafore, orna-
ments, stockings, gold embroidered
carriers, silk handkerchief and long
gloves. For two years of married life
the bride is permitted to wear lilac
and green, but after that she dresses
entirely in black.
To the Woodworking Schwalmer folk
a wedding is the brightest and gayest
event of their lives. The bridegroom
in his long-skirted coat adorned with
the wedding insignia has an imposing
appearance.
The guests and relations having
greeted the young pair with a speech,
the wedding procession begins. The
clergyman after addressing the bridal
pair blesses them, and they seal their
marriage by Joining hands. No rings
are exchanged.
On returning to the wedding house
the husband drinks to his bride. Then
she pledges him, throwing away the
glass afterward so that the fortune Of
the house may be secure. Congratula-
tons follow, and then the bridegroom
leads his bride into his fathers house.
At the wedding feast the bridal pair
eat from the same plate and drink
from one glass. The food consists Of
soup, beef and roast sausage. When
coffee is served the bride appears for
the first time in her dress Of green
and lilac.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1912-03-22
KILL BOIL WEEV|lS.
Necessity Of Reducing Number CT
Insects Very Urgent.
Most Impo tant Step in Producing Cot.
ton IS Found by Experimenters Is
Destruction of Foliage and
Squares.

{By G. H. Afford, Spcciai .,sent OF the
Farmers Cooperative Demonstration
Work, Jackson. Miss)
This is lesson No one, and it should
be thoroughly learned, The need or
so reducing the oyer-Wintered weevlls
as to reduce the cost and labor Of pick
ing the Weevils and punctured squares
to the minimum Is very urgent.
There are four methods of reducing
the number of weevils To the mini.
mum: First, completely denude the cot
ton stalks of foliage, squares and
bolls, the weevils sole food supply
pillow the stalks under good and deep,
or burn the stalks at the earliest pos
sible moment in the fall Second, at
some time during the winter, destroy
the rubbish in and about the fields
which might serve as alternating
quarters for weevils. Third, when the
weeyils appear On the little cotton
in the spring pick them of and destroy
them. Fourth, pick up the punctured
squares ard destroy them for at least
one month after the first squares form
on the cotton.
The results obtained by the United
States bureau of entomology, the farm.
ers' demonstration work, the Louisi.
ana State Crop Pest commission and
thousands of successful farmers point
to the supreme Importance of the early
fall destruction of the boil Weevils
sole food supply. the squares. small
bolls. and foliage on the cotton stalks.
The conclusion reached by thousands
of experimenters justify NE in making
the statement that the most iElpor-
tant step in producing cotton in boil
weevil territory is the e{rly fall de-
struction Of the foliage, squares, and
immature punctured bolls on the cot
ton stalks. In fact, feel almost JUS
titled in saying that the early fall de-
struction Of the cotton stalks outbal-
arces all other remedies that may be
employed to destroy the wecvils.
In an experiment performed By the
Bureau of Entomology in Calhoun
County, Tex, the stalks growing on
410 acres of land were destroyed early
In October. Careful records kept dur
Ing the following season showed that
the destruction of stalks ON this land
increased the yield $14.56 per acre.
An experiment was conducted en- OF
posite sides of the Guaddloupe: river
near Victoria, Tex. The stalks were
burned on one farm the latter part of
September, and on the other they were
allowed to stand until in spring before
planting time. Forty acres On the
farm on which the STALKS were de-
- rnsl made Is bales Forty acres,
stssrxhe other farm made and l-2bales.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1912-03-22
PHYSICIAN SAID ECZEMA
CAME FROM TEETHING

"When my little girl was about eight
months old, she was taken with very
irritating breaking out, which came on
her face, neck and back. When she
first came down with it, it came in
little watery.like testers under her
/ eyes. and on her chin. then after few
days it wo.ld dry down in scaly, white
scabs. In the daytime she was quite
worrysome and would dig and scratch
her face nearly all the time.
II consulted our physician and
found she was suffering from eczema,
which he said came from her teething.
l used the ointment he gave mo and
without any relief at all. Then /
wrote for book ON Cuticura, and pur-
chased some Cuticura Soap and Oint.
ment at the drug store. / did as l
found directions in the Cuticura Book.
let, and when she was one year old,
she was entirely cured. Now she is
three years and four months, and she
has never been troubled with eczema
since she was cured by the Cuti.
cura Soap and Cuticura Ointment.
(Signed) Mrs. Freeman Craver, gil
Lewis St.. Syracuse, N. Y, May 6,
1911. Although Cuticura Soap and
Ointment are sold everywhere, a sam
pie Of each, with 32-page book, will
be mailed free on application to "Cuti.
cura," Dept. L. Boston.