Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1912-02-22
THE SALVE
OF LOVE
By SARAH w. CHANNELS
Copyright by American Press Assoc
citation. 1871.

woman whose expression | have often
studied. but always failed TO interpret.
1t may be best described as the ex-
pressicn Of one who has been disap-
pointed. but has accepted the disap-
pointment philosophically. The most
surprising thing OIL the premises Is
doorplate on which are the words
Matrimonial Agency
Now. | am a happily married wo-
man aud in no need of husband, for
mine is the best man in the world.
and / am the mother of seven dear
children. In short. our family is
loving one But, having passed the lit
lie woman at the window many times,
my curiosity at last got the better of
me, and | went in. thought the best
way to gain information would be to
personate a client SO | invited the
woman to explain her methods.
"To begin WITH" she said, II don't
recommend matrimony to nobody I'm
wilin 70 interduce them as is banker
in after it, but I'm honest enough to
tell EN- that it's a good deal like dis
sipation-its follered by headache"
81 should think that would injure
your business" / remarked
mot a bit. My opinion is when peo-
pie get the matrimonial fever they got
to 20 through it just like any other
fever only it's wuss, because most
people git over other fevers within
few weeks or months at most, but the
matrimonial fever usually lasts life
time. Most times it attacks some fell
Ter and some girl 10 onct Sich cases
can't be stopped. The cases that ! put
through are those where a man or
woman pines for mate.
Nov, you're a likely loollin' woman,
and | don't want to do you no harm,
but | advise you to let matrimony
alone. Youth only jump from the fry
ing pan into the fire. You're used as
single person to dom a hundred diff
ferent things day, none of 'em, meb-
be, Of any importance. Just as soon
as you're married you got to stop
and think whether your husband will
approve of your dom any one of 'em
the way that suggests itself to you
Or If he's with you he'll tell you that
your way is not the best, If you think
1t RELY is the best, you got to argue
about It. When you've had a scrap
over ninety-nine of these little mat
tiers during the day. about the time the
hundredth comes up youll be mighty
tired o. the argument. What kind Of
n man do you wantT'
She asked the last question appar-
emily well satisfied that she did not
consider her warning would be needed
and having eased her conscience she
was ready for business.
well" | said. 81 think I'd like a
man who would always give me my
own way about everything. When
I'm feeling cross, | would like him to
pet me, and If | receive his caresses
coldly or snap at him, I'd wish him
to still be as pleasant to me as May
morning"
Look a-here" she interrupted, II
amt In this business to sell n million
dollars worth O. stuff for 70 cents If
you want that kind Of man you'd
better 60 to a heavenly matrimonial
exchange and get an introduction TO
an angel What kind of woman be
your"
80 far as human nature will per
nit. I'm the kind Of a woman as the
man I've described ] have seven
children and sometimes tire meet
ing their requirements, but | rub my
tiredness with the salye Of love and
it takes 1t right out of me. Ny hus-
band comes home disappointed at
some failure he has made during the
day; ten TO one our boy jim has fall
en- into some dirty hole ard ruined a
suit Of clothes. so you see I'm ready
to slap at his father, and his father
to slap back at me. but before he
gets home l get out my love salve and
take a good rubbing and when he ap-
pears am ready to cheer him up"
The woman followed me with curl
Gus glance while / was saying this and
when stopped said:
what kind OF a fancy picture are
you giviu me, anyway"
1T isn't a fancy picture; it's a true
one I'm really married and the mother
Of seven children In eur medicine
closet we keep n big pot Of the oint-
ment of love, and my husband and
use it continually As for the children,
they don't need TO use It. They are
born with love in their hearts for their
parents and each other Perhaps when
they grow older a good rubbing with
the salve viii save them much trou-
Bile, but while they are young their ir-
rltauous are self healing. From what
You have told me / think it possible
that you may have tried to keep house
without a pot of this ointment in your
house Get your family together and
use the love salye freely"
Without any further remark or apol-
ogy for calling | withdrew. A few
days later. when | passed the matri
monial exchange. it was closed. nei
Their saw nor heard anything from the
agent for a year, when / was surprised
TO receive n call from her.
I came to thank you for that oint
ment YOU give me. she said After
you left me ! give myself a good rub.