The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-03-24

sarved that iv'ry time [ took step | was
goin' north. I thought at first / was out iv me
head, thin it occurred to me that we must he
at tn south pole. So I marked it an come
home have on y to put down me scientific
discov 'res:
"fICE-We found practic lily Unlimited
supply iv durable ice iv good quality.
'SNOW-We were enable to bring back
amy samples iv ann-artic snow, but in
a gin raj way it can be described as
snow
"'VIGYTATION-Thr v canned vigy-
tables were discovered in our soup
fr I'm time to time
4" POPULATION Ourselves at tn pole
Cap Scott north iv u.s.
+" 'FAUNA-Wanst we thought we see
bur-rd.
"'GIN'RAL OBSERVATIONS We're
here first annyhow Thank hivens, we
bate tn Englishman'
'Now what kind iv story is that f'r me to
dig up five cents f'r iv Sundah mornin?
cud've wrote tn same mesilf FIR half tn
money. An here's ivrybody cheerin FIR Cap
Amundsen an nobody sayin' kind wurrud
FIR me old frind tn Dock, who discovered tn ,
north pole without lawn the house. Sup
pose the Dock had dhreamed he discovered tn ,
south pole, thin ye'd have something in tn pa
apers that wud be worth talkin' about. AT
this pint we encountered a flock iv zebras
that / thrained to take tn place iv our tired
dogs. At latytude eighty-six forty we dis
covered a range iv mountains three hundherd
thousand feet high covered with petri6ed pink
azalyas an infested with prehistoric mon
sthers wan iv which, Bazamalooka, or, as it is
pou 'larly known, tn Hickthum, 1 captured be
imitatin tn love call iv tn mate. This sthrange
crather measured forty yards fir IN wing tip to
wing tip an , onlike other monsthers iv this
region which carry their young spiked on tn
dorsal fin, wheels thin in kind iv pramby-
later made iv tn hide iv tn Wappah. I soon
made frinds iv me captive an taught her to
sing in a conthralto voice, but she took a
strange dislike to me Eskymo companyons,
an whin she had eaten four iv tn
most prom 'nent Republicans iv Upernavik l
found it ncissry to desthroy her Before don
so | carefully preserved an stuffed tn
body which left behind with me observa-
tions I have tn check fir IN tn baggage room
somewheres an will be very glad to show it
to amy larned ciety if can find it. On De-
climber sixth somethin told me 1 was within
sthrikn' distance iv tn pole. 1t may have
been mesilf. Anyhow, | determined on an
early start. Breakfast har1y out iv tn
way whin we begun our pearlous advance. Our
sufferins firm that time on wurruds can
harly describe In Novimber we run out iv
sponge cake an five iv our party deserted. On
top iv this calamity were sthricken with
an epydimic iv snufhes tn most tur-be iv
artic plaques. On Thanksgivin day our hands
were so chapped L cud harly carve tn turkey.
In Poughkipsy ! took an observation iv tn
timprachoor be BLOWN me breath on tn win
dow pane. 1t was three hundherd and eight
degrees below zero, But did finch On con-
sultin me note book FIR this date I find that
I did not. / knew tn coveted goal was IN
sight. An so, on tn thirty-frst iv Febry,
worn out, famished, with wan overshoe gone,
half blind with waitin be tn dim light, me
eyes rested on tn lemon grove that surrounds
tn south pole.
''That's tn kind iv way | want me ex-
,,lnrations ,urofe nm not like an account iv a