davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
Sad Excuse.

They were twittinG a friend who
suffered upon the fact that he had
never been married.
81 kn-kn-know, boys, that I've never
b-b-been married, but | was pre-pre-
pretty near it once"
How was that?" they inquired.
well, you see. l ask-ask-asked a
girl to hav-hav-have me, and she said
that she'd rather be eX-ex-excused. and
l was such a fe-fo-fool, ex-exexcused
her"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
Cold Welcome,

A clergyman in a small town was
deploring the fact that none of the
couples that came in from the coun.
try to be married stopped at his house
for The purpose.
We'll, brother" said the mar ad-
dressed, what can you expect with
that big sign on the tree there: Five
dollars fine for hitching here?'"-
Youths Companion.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
The Ugly Brute.

See that measuring worn crawl
ing UP my skirt?" cried Mrs. Bjenks.
That's a sign I'm going to have a
dress"
Well, let him make it for YOU"
growled Mr.. Bjenks. And while he's
about ii, have him send a hookworm
to do you up the back. I'm tired Of
he job"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

raw spring months.
They stop backache
and urinary disor-
ders, keep the kid
neys well and pre-
vent colds from set
ting on the kidneys.
Mrs. Z. A. Bennett,
Johnson Ave, Los
Gatos, Cal, says: IF
/ took cold or over
worked, I had such
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
When Your Eyes Need Care

Try Marine Eye Remedy. No Smarting-Feeis
Fine-Acts Quickly. Try it for Red Weak,
Watery Eyes and Granulated Eyelids. Illus.
trated Book in each Package. Murine is
compounded by our Oculists- not u "Patent Med
icine"-but used in successful Physicians' Prac-
tice for many years. Now dedicated to the Pub
lie and sold by Druggists at Csc and Soc per Bottle.
Murine Eye Salve In Ascptic Tubes, 26c and Soc.
Murine Eye Remedy Co.. Chicago
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

A very successful remedy for pelvic
catarrh is hot douches of Paxtine An
tiseptic, at druggists, 25c a box or sent
postpaid on receipt of price by The
Paxton Toilet, Co., Boston, Mass.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
NOTHING Hard About That.

The woman l marry" he said.
must be able to blush" oh" she
replied, Il can do that. l blush every
time | am seen anywhere with
you."-San Francisco Chronicle.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
In Dancer.

Griggs-So Bachelor is sick at the
hospital? Is there any cause for anx-
iety?
~Briggs-Yes, he has a deucedly
pretty nurse.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
The Reason For Il.

That candidate certainly has a
skillful way of working on peoples
feelings"
But, then, you know, he's a den
tist."
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
COLDS AND cHILls
BRING KIDNEY ILLS

Colds, chills and grip strain the kid.
neys and start backache, urinary dis.
orders and uric acid troubles. Doan's
Kidney Pills are very useful in -
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
Those ParoIed Ones.

No. 67,S40 Cust paroled)-W'y, Tur.
tie, 'ow are you? Wot's doin' in d
biz"
His Old Pal - Hullo, Chicken!
Shake. Wot's new in d biz? Nothin'
much. Dere's a Teller invented a
vault door OATS five year ahead OF d.
times!
No. 81, S40-Gee, dat's bad!
The Pal-An' Skinny Moss has in.
vented a jimmy OATS five years ahead
of d new doori
Some people love to tell the truth
when they think it will hurt.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
Sick
WOMEN

When shown positive and reliable proof that a certain
remedy had cured many cases OF female ills, wouldn't any
sensible woman conclude that the same remedy would also
benefit her if suffering with the same troublel
Here are five letters from southern women which prove
the efficiency of Lydia E.. Pinkhams Vegetable Compound.
LETTER FROM VIRGINIA.
EIiston, Val feel it my duty to express my thanks to you xd yous
great medicine. Twas a sufferer from female troubles and had hrn Con
housework and had fainting spells 81 that my husband could NOT leave me
alone for five minutes at a time.
Now 1 owe my health to Lydia f. Pinkhams Vegetable compe~ud and
Blood Purifier. Whenever see a suffering woman / want to tell hs whas
these medicines have done for me and I will always speak good word for
them"-Mrs. ROBERT BLANKENsHIP, Eriston, Montgomery Co. Va
LETTER FROM LOUISIANA
fore / took Lydia E. Pinkhamfs Vegetable Compound 1 was troubled with
hot flashes, weak and dizzy feelings, backache and irregularities xwouLd
get up in the morning feeling tired out and not fit to do anything:
"Snce 1 have been taking your Compound and Blood Purifier I feel all
right. Your medicines are worth their weight in gold'-hr& GAs1ox
BLoNDEAU, 1871 Poymnia St. New Orleans, La
LETTER FROM FLORIDA.
Wauchula, Fla-"some time ago 1 wrote to you, giving You my syap
by female troubles
package of Sanative Wash and that was all L used to make me a we'll woman.
II an satisfied that if 1 had done like a good many women, aHS had
not taken your remedies, I would have been a great sufferer But r~&artea
in time with the right medicine and got well 1t did not cost very mc4
either. L feel that you are a friend to all women and l would rather uss
your remedies than nave a doctor"-Mrs MATTE HoDNoT. Box 400. Wan
chula, Florida.
LETTER FROM WEST VIRGINIA.
Martinsburg, W. Val am glad to say that Lydia E Pinkhsms vege-
table Compound has done wonders for my mother, daughter md lyNE
she hears a girl complaining with cramps, she tells her to take your Cw
pound"-Mrs. MARY A. HocKENBERRY, 7s N. ad St, Martinaburg. IVA
ANOTHER LETTER FROM VIRGINIA.
Newport News, va-"About five years ago 1 was troubled with sah pasns
IA friend told me to take Lydia +. Pinkhams Vegetable Compound and
soon found relief: The medicine strengthened M in every way and my
II will be glad if my testimony will help some one who is ssserins
from female weakness" Mrs W. J.. BLAYToNc 1929 Hampton Ave- Newport
News, Va.
As
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

A long life and u merry one may be rx-
pected b. those who use Garfield Tea, the
natural herb regulator. For sale at all drug
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

1t often happens that when a man
knows his duty he tries to stave it
Off by seeking advice.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

Love laughs at locksmiths, but il
sometimes cries over spilled milk.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

PILES CURED IN O 40 IL DAYS
Your druggist will refund money IL PAZO ONT
MENr fails TO cure any case of Itching, Blind.
Bleeding or ProJruding Piles In 8 10 Ia days. Soc.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

FARMS FOR RENT OR SALE ON CROP
payments. J. MULHALL. Sioux City. la.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

AS a corrective for indigestion and a regu.
lator of the system, no remedy can excel in
purity and efficiency Garfield Tea.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

Mrs. Wfnslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces infanma
ton, allays pain. cures wind collie, pc u bottle
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
Quite So.

PA, what is a tidy fortune?'"
"A clean, crisp, ten-dollar bill, my
SON."
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

ONLY n "BROMO O~UININE."
That is LAXATIVE BRONU QulNINE. Look for
the signature OF E. W. GROYE. Used the World
over 10 Cure a Cold in One Day. &c.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

When the Millennium comes Garfield Tea
aud Holy Church will not bc longer needed.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

A woma seldom eats if there Is
anything else for her to do.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

A sermon is either based on a text
or q pretext.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

But it takes a m to keep a
secret she doesn't know.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

No, Alonzo, a girl isn't necessarily
an angel because she is a high flyer.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

Bad luck is often but another name
for poor management.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

If you arde poorer than your rela-
lions it is easy for you to dodge them.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

"Pink Eye" Is Epidemic in the Spring.
Try Murine Eye Remedy for Reliable Relief.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

Color more goods brighter and faster colors than an
dye any garment without ripping apart. Write 1
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

person,
must ad-
} of hic-
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21

about
n with
which
back.
Il It,, it
5 under
n after
b scaly,
he was
ig and
time.
d found
which
ing. l
ne and
hen l
nd pur-
i'd Oint-
i'd as 1
a Book
ear old,
' she is
and she
eczema
C~uticura
(Signed
wis St..
Id Oint.
sample
will be
D "Cuti-
lunge Is
person,
must ad-
, of hic-
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-21
LETTER r. FLORIDA.
LETTER FROM WEST VIRGINIA

Martinsburg, W. Val am glad to say that Lydia &
table Compound has done wonders for my mother, daught
81 have told dozens Of people about it and my daughte
she hears a girl complaining with cramps, she tells her to
pound."-Mrs. MARY A. HoCKENBERRY, 72 N. 3rd St., Ma
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

the
W for
heard
aw
their Il
have the
line and held pushing
lie Landed
but his teeth exactly what
to I
in
a
failed L commit suIcide
through
WORKS NO
hopt mon
of him to-day lie
you lame him
As get letter of Introduction
be nominated JIM IiACKIER, County harma
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
TAFT AT BALL GAME
WHILE CONVENTION
FIGHT IS HOTTEST.

WASHINGTON. d. c.. June H. when
the Republican Convention nskt was
hottest at Chicago this afternoon. Presi-
dent Tai. went to the BAN Eaw- The
President was accompanied by Mrs.
Taft. Vice President sherman and Secre-
tary Knox.
President Taft had his smile with ~
and appeared In nne humor. acknowl-
sAgpg with . chuckle the applause that
greeted his appearance on the grounds.
All Washington IL baseball Grassy over
the sixteen successive victories scored
on tho road by the Warrington club.
and thousands turned out to greet them
on their return home and root for .
win over the Athletics. their opponents
to-day
The President. like Q true fan. vas
soon absorbed In the game and apDeavod
oblivious OF the convention happenings
or anything else.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
LET THE PEOPLE RULE.
CALIFORNIA FOR ROOSEVELT
BY 1900.

There was u wild cheer from the
Roosevelt men already In their seats.
but II lasted only couple of seconds
As soon as the Sergeant-at-Arms saw
the banner he sent messenger to cali
Police Captain Heaiy.
Il want those banners taken out" he
said to Healy, and I want you 10 In
struct your men that no more are to be
permitted In the han"
Healy demurred, telling Stone that he
did not believe that he had the au-
thority.
why don't you have one Of your
men put q out7" asked Stone.
II am here merely 10 preserve order"
said Hsly.
WELL" said Stone. II simply thought
you could do II best"
Capt Heay then went over with .
deputy serseant-at-arms and tho BAN
nsr was rolled up by the delesAte who
was carrying q.
Later sergeant-at-Arms Stone reient-
cd on his banner rule and said they
could be brought In for . parade
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
MOST IMPORTANT
COMMITTEES NAMED
BY TIE REPUBLICANS

CHICAGO. June ls,--Folowing are tn,
members OF the new National Committee
and the Committee on Credentials:
National Committee
Committeeman. on Credentials.
Ala.--'P. ID. Barker. Alsr. q. Birch,
Aris.--Ralph II. Cameron Robt. u. Morrison.
Ark
Cal. Mover Assnss. Frsnei, J. Heney.
Col. --SimOn Gusgnheim Thomas H. Dsyins
Conn. sc. l.. l'noksr J. Henry Norsh-ck
Del. Coleman DilpnntiIlmun Mitchell.
FlA.--sIIsnry ". Chnbb. n, II. McFarlAns.
Cs.-Henr' y, Jackson. Henry Blum Ir,
Idal,o--John ", Hart. G. st. Clair,
NJ. Roy. o. West, H. r. Mccormick
lnd.--Jas r. 0oodrich. J. A. Heasawsy.
Iowa.. T. Adams. J. A. Dewitt.
Kss.--wm. Allen White.
ksntuchy-
I,ouIsisna- wv. l.. Cohen.
Aass- rUlgt1k ~ Jsss n Xhhs. 1880
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

50 great that the police had to shove
many Of the delegates out OF the aisles.
The leaders OF the state deiegataon
were In constant consultat ton with their
followers and there was a nervous ten
sion In evidence seldom seen In . Re-
publican National Convention.
The South Dakota delegates came to
the convention riding In an old welis-
Fargo stage coach. which had been
pressed into service.
CALIFORNIA BANNER STARTS
TROUBLE.
Soon after they entered. California
delegation came In with a big banner. Il
read;
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

dribbled out again after getting piled up
in doorways and wedgel on stairways
and boosted along by unfeeling police
men.
The net information usually gained
by one trip through the merry-go-round
was that everything looked favorable"
/ made various inquiries OF men wear
ing different sizes of badges and each
one leaned over and megaphoned TO my
ear that everything looked favorable.
BY the time l escaped through a dark
passageway into the alley had pretty
clear idea OF HOW things stood.
Once got carried down long marble
chute and wrlggled my way into huge
apartment dimly lighted. that somebody
said was the El.zabethan room. 1t was
conges,ed with delegates and alternates
waiting to shake hands with the Colonel
Shades OF Martin Van Buren,. A little
social function being pulled or right In
the nolslest corner OF the boiler works
OF the three hundred men in the room
nine-tenths were under fifty years of
age, or so 1t seemed. because nearly all
Of them wore college clothes and new
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

Some Of tho most eminent Scientists In
Europe consider "Crystoiis," the New Ems.
lish Hair Grower. tho most wonderful
discovery Of the century.
The Judges OF the BRUSSELS and Paris
Expeditions Enthusiastically awarded Goid
Medals to this marvellous hair grower.
Since ws secured the American rights
thousands OF men and women from all
parts OF the world writa falling 81 tho
phenomenal results obtained by Its use
People who have been bald for 80 years
now glory In beautiful hair. Others who
have had dnndruff all their lives have got
. clean. healthy scalp after n few appii-
cations OF this wonderful drug.
We don't care whether you are bothered
with falling hair. prsmaturely gray hair
matted hair brittle hair or stringy hair;
dandruff. itching scalp. o. any or all
forms Of hair trouble. we want you to try
"CRYSTOLIS' at our risk
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
DENY SECRETARY MEYER =
WILL LEAVE THE CABINET.

WARRINGTON. June lA-1t wao en-
phaticeiiy denied both At the wnlts
House and ~ the NAVY Dsparensae te-
day that Secretary OF the Navy 1gsyss.
who has gone 10 HE hopne 81 Ham1nsa.
Mass, has any intention Of res1gsiag
from tho Cabinet. Meyer 10 sufeueng
from . mild stomach troubis and -
gone to Massachusetts, to secape Ne
heat IN Washington. Il wNs sxpaaAnsds
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

from Georgia. offered several newspaper
men a full set OF delegates tickets for
SIS. lie said that he needed the money"
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
MRS. LoN0WORTH GOT LION.
ESs's SHARE or ATTENTION.

Alice Roosevelt Longworth. clad IN
blue and white and bareheaded, occupied
box with her husband ans was easily
the woman In the hall wH) attracted
most attention; In fact. she monopolzed
the attention OF the audience from the
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
Fuse LIGHTED FOR BIG BLOW OFF.

Whea a man is being carried from one
township to another In the close en-
brace Of Western cyclone. he 10 not
qualified to formulate any Impartial.
criticism OF the weather bureau.
Let me tell you Just what saw to.
day. Perhaps you and the Other nil.
lions who are sitting far away under
the soft naples. with part OF your rea.
soning faculties still in operation. and
your eyes unblinded by smoke. can fig
ure out something from these war bul-
lstins.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

expected
a.
only mild
twnkng with straw hats and white skirts while the cool
The whole umn deum this
Q guch Off Michigan
the
with
3
Of hafr
n / the
THE COLONEL IN THEIR MIDST:
desiring evening
to a ind a
In
herw In to the
the agitation
a nourishmen their
million o /
notco
refus
lis the
an
On Of which used to
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

around the han. but that ~ this were
done they would have to be removed
again.
We cannot have banners hoistsd a
the hoor." DECLARED Stone.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
GEORGE ABE SHY Of CALM
AS He TRIES TO DESCRIBE
THE BIG POLITICAL CIRCUS
Impressions of the Chicago Conven-
ton Written to the Home Folks
by the County Chairman.
BY GEORGE AIDE.
Copyright. 1912. by George Ade)
Chicago, June II.


Vance Jim mison, Antioch, Ind:
MY DEAR VANCE-Before leaving
home yesterday l took three pre-.
cautions. First, I pinned my money
inside my vest. Then I filled q large
shoe box with home cooking 40 q 81.
lent protest against the high cost of
living. Then I laid my hand on Rid.
paths history and made q solemn vow
that no matter what happened this
week l would remain calm.
Well. my bank roll Is still intact
except for the wrapper. The reserve
Of cold vituals 10 planted under my
little cot here on the top floor of q
madhouse that will strAighten up and
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18


ranka al
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18

hotel week But the
entirely vaporaed am all out Of calm and can't nnd
From where
beating ammng
through the
locoed and mussed this evening.
Talk about red
condensed atmosphere
put Into cans and preserved would
for the
Fuse LIGHTED FOR BIG BLOW OFF,
have been the pam
ngerso Conklng
elbow get
corner with couple OF wise likes and receive tho
This IL and
would hunt a teller
Of
whether
OF
chicago
been lighted Gomez tor 49,
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1912-06-18
CONVENTION SEATS
AT $50 FOR SERIES;
TRAFFIC is LIVELY,

CHICAGO. June ls.-There was q lively
traffic In convention tickets while the
hall was slowly filling UP. Across the
street from the Coliseum, on Wabash
avenue. a firm of enterprasins ticket
speoulators established an office In
JsDkson's Storage warehouse They put
cut Q big sign reading:
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1912-02-14

merce caused by the opening of the
Panama canal and the utilization Of
the country's resources by manufac-
turing them, instead of exporting the
raw material, there are but three
Lcints to be considered, namely On
Houston Galveston; cd New Orleans:
(3) Pensacola
Substantiating the argument above.
New Orleans today is the first city on
the gulf. because she has had the ben
eflt of inland water transportation to
the great producing states.
Houston Galveston is tie second.
because Of the proximity to q terri
tory Of production.
And / call Pensacola the third for
the following reasons:
She has the best natural harbor on
the gulf; she has the closest rail con-
nection with the Birmingham and
Coosa iron and coal fields: she is
nearest to the southern part of the
Appalachian coal, iron and hardwood
region, destined to be the rnanufac-
turing center of the United States.
because there are found the raw
products and the power together. Pen
sacola is nearer to the southern part
c. this region than any other port.
The Apalachicola river system is nav
igable to the most southern water
power-Colunbus Ga This river
system is now being connected BY
ceastwise inland waterways with Pen
saeola- The FL smingham coal and
iron fields will also be connected with
Pensacola by inland waterways upon
the construction of a canal at a cost
1of about $500, 600. This same coastal
inland water connection will give
Pensacola water route to the Mis-
sissippi river and all the dement's of
the competitive rates given to New
0YsIa y
tenn.
Thus, by the Mississippi to Atlantic
Inland Waterway. the ore natural
handicap Of Pensacola will be elin1-
mated, giving her, also, a certain adj
vantage. There viii be no slit deposit
IT. her harbor. while she will have the
benefit of water competition, by means
OF trunk line Of inland water $4,000
miles long to the Guild plain and
Mississippi basin.
Where are the initiative impulses to
originate, to prepare for these condi-
tons? VIII New York give them
VIII Pensacola grow to contain one
million people through the efforts OF
Chicago?
No. Cities do not develop through
the aid of other cities. Neither do
houses are. And they are built by
their citizens. 1t is their confidence,
aspirations and undertakings which
attract people capital and enterprise
from other sections of the country.
Pensacola should be a metropolis
and will be, If her citizens undertake
to make her so. In this ei1deavor the
Commercial Association should be the
prophet, architect and promoter.
That my belief in southern devel-
opnlent may not be considered toe
sanguine. offer you brief quotations
from two authorities. First from q
politician: