New-York tribune., 1912-03-31


tie Of which appeals TO the sailors on the matr-
monia sea They care nothing at all about the fact that
the old home oTIenry Clay used as real estate
office, or that Fighting Bob Evans occupied a humble
little brick house far down on lndana-aVe, IN neigh
borhoOd whence fashion and wealth had long since fed
They do not even bat cyed when told that the dome
Of the Capitol is built Of caStiron plates adjusted that
they can slide one another IN response to the varying
atmospheric conditions. Only few OF then exhibit
human intelligence when informed that Admiral Dewey
does not reside in the house presented 70 him by The
patriotic American pubic.
But thcv do come out Of their trance when the pccr
shouting in a deep and foghorned voice. gets this Of:
~On yor right are the Botanical Gardens and in the
big bldng in the center are plants from every part Of
The civilized and uncvilized world. OF particular in
crcst is a shrub which, under certain conditions, par
alyzes the human tongue We call 1t the mother in law
plant
and seem unable to believe that either would eyer
want the mother Of the other snc ken dumb Iaey a.e
50 horrfcd by this evidence Of the worlds hard bri.
,alitv that they do not even crack smile when ne
lecturer informs them later on:
"On your right is the Washington Monument the
highest onc-story building in the world
But they do sit up and take notice "hen they are
shown Perry Bemont's house, (which cost on million
dollars exclusive Of the ground and they gze open
eyed AT the thrcc-million-doar home built by Thomas
+ Walsh In the stoncwork Of this house, on aa rga,
OF the entrance there is block Of gold ore taken from
one Of the Walsh mines.
Because all brides ami bridcgrooms expect 90 be
,nillonarcs as soon as they parachute down .rDn
the realms Of romance and begin to inquire 'n'o ,he
price Of chicken they appreciate greatly the i'a1"ng
spiel: go
We are now rounding Dupont Circle, The mystic
center Of more wealth than is represented on SIMILAR
amount Of ground in any other part OF the world Here
there is nothing but money. Everything IS grcentacks.
Even the leaves on the trees have green backs @ J-1s
have bill, in their mouths and the horses have acon
their heads. And these people are never sas'oa In
the summertime they 60 away tor h,'Ie chang"
This trip which is usually a desperate 4t'Gap, .
ehov lot OF interesting things 20 a 10, Of blind people,
generally ends at Arlington where the lecturer speaks
fcclingv Of deaths, flowers, and immortality. have
seen such spiel make all the newly cry as i 'n"t
hearts would break. II is the first nma;lon they have
had that their happiness is not eternal and that unless
bev are both struck by lightning the same moment,
one Of them will have 70 kiss the cold ps o th, Ctae;
goodby After they have cried sufficiently ana tipped
The lecturer for the luxury o tears they buy ucEe;
back home and spend the next ten years dcscrng %
their ncghbOrs all the interesting things tneN 81. 10;
Ii YOU don't believe that honeymoon love !. bin!
and in the matter Of intelligent observation. IL ~a't.g
mt, all YOU have 20 do is watch this sraug'. "er-,
and marvellous element Of the population s...ng the
sights of Washington. They about as t.t.. as a
chloroformcd bat or a blind tisa-and, wha's -.-. %
the point, they are glad Of II.
ALL sorts Of ncwy-wcds go TO Washing goa,-'.e r:-a,
n the poor those from Virginia, and those ..," >al
Francisco the bushng young hing Of nine''.. an- ,e
elderly party who just squeezed under the VIC a1t S
proud Of it. Most Of them rush in during ~ pnas,
when there is the whisper Of sentiment on a o-eeze
and the sunsets look ike clouds Of romano ..as1g
close to the earth But the procession never stops y
is good every dav in the year and some peop even 20
to Washington to be married Christmas Day. -a--
ing that each one is a fine gift to the other.
Taking it all in all. Cupid IS King in The a.a4l
CAPITAL He wins the Presidents brghtcst su. IS
members Of Congress waiting him, and he turns up
his nose at some Of the most sacred shrnes o. re
nations history. He is one Of the mos, valuable ID,
vance agents the hotels have, and the politicians nd
Government clerks recognize his victims ever day. 20
matter whether they sit stone deaf in the publ. g-es
Of the Senate or 90 down in the basement OF IN" Tres
,lrv. where. smiling fatuously and happily they ao n