The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1912-07-16
Calamity
Joe
AfterWard Called
Cupid"
BY CLARIsSA MACKIE
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES.

I
slowly up the trail, his long legs drag
ging below the stirrups.
"You can sup on trouble now, boys,
declared Hen Morgan.
"How's thatT' queried his compan-
ions curiously.
This here gent approaching, him
who Is to be line rider on the Flying
V along with the rest of US, is the
champion dispenser of bad luck. Wher-
ever he goes he brings calamity with
| him."
1--WE heard about him, then. Amt
his name Joe Bliss? asked Pete VIII
! lis.
EYES, They call him Calamity joe
because of the sure woe that camps on
his trail perpetual" answered Morgan.
They sat about the door of the mess
house and watched the shambling
| forms of horse and rider approach
| them.
Presently the horse scuf1ed to a
standstill, and Mr.. Joe Bliss threw a
long leg over the saddle and stepped
to the ground.
"Howdy, gents?' he said, looking
| gloomily down at them
"Howdy, Joe?" said Morgan sadly
LET me interjooce my Teller suffer
ers!' and he gravely mentioned the
names of his companions, who all ex,
changed mods and muttered 'howdys"
| with the newcomer.
tsVUhot no Ouar 60 LN1o ~, ,Jep
asked Morgan as Bliss sat down and
rolled cigarette
Measles" replied Bliss stoically. Il
never had 'em in my life, but old
| Flamm seemed to be afraid I'd catch
'em, so he fred me. I'd only been there
q week"
The next morning they rode forth to-
gether, Joe Bliss ahead and the FIVE
following in broken line.
Seems to enjoy his bad reputashun. :"
remarked Morgan to Freeman.
"Quite some! l been looking for
measle spots all the morning." return
ed Freeman.
1T won't be measles this time. He
changes his calamity every time he
changes job. Well get something
else as sure as eggs is eggs," muttered
Morgan.
IF he plants any calamity on this
here outfit he'll sure get his" de-
clared Freeman violently, and some
how Joe Bliss heard the words.
II got ter do something to get rid Of
that reputation" he admitted to him
self and thereupon thought long upon
the matter
And it bore startling results. 1t took
some time to accomplish. but the ma
ture Of Calamity Joe's vindication Of
his Ill name will go down In the his
tory Of Poorgrass county.
Several weeks passed without any
thing unfortunate occurring to bear
up the evil reputation of the new man.
Then one day Joe Bliss received leave
Of absence and was gone all the morn
ing. AT noon as his fellow riders were
eating lunch on the fringe of the scat
tered herd of cattle Joe rode hastily
up to Morgan.
Gents" he said excitedly, there's
some ladies in distress yonder in Salt
canyon. Picnic ladies they are, and
some yaller minded individual has
stampeded their horses. What's them
delicate females goin to DOR
'Huhp' calculated Morgan. Where
they fromY'
'They say they are salesladies from
Finklestein's dry goods emporium In
Eagle City
what they picnicking so far from
home for?" demanded Freeman.
"Skeered-plumb skeered for fear
old Finklestein will change his mind
and call 'em back on the job. Why,
them girls is so upset about how
they're going to get back to Eagle City
that they can't enjoy their lunch no
how exclaimed Calamity Joe.
"Finklestein's, in Eagle CityT' que
ried Smith suddenly. why, that's
where bought this here handker-
chief She was a queen, that girl
wasp
'Was she a blondf" asked Jepson
eagerly. Il remember a peach of a
blond In Finklestein's. who
mary blond" was Freeman's EN-
phatic reply. "She was a dark eyed
queen! I'll go over. Morgan, and help
my lady friend out of trouble"
Huh! You don't even know her
namer snorted Morgan contemptuous-
Iy. II guess III move along over there
myself. | bought a shirt In Finkle
STEMS last week, and l want to ask
the red haired lady got it from if it's
fast color" His handsome face
flushed defantly
"Mebbe there amt a red haired lady
to the picnic" said Smith disagreeahly
"She's therew interpolated Joe Bliss
hastily. ''Mebbe all you gents could
ride over to the canyon and rescue
them danes. amt much on ladies'
company. and so I'll jest look out for
the critters
The five other men consulted togeth.
er, and finally all rode off in the direc-
| ton of Salt canyon. Meantime Joe
the harbinger of calamity. stuck to his
job and manfully did the work of six
| herders that sunshiny day.
THAT combination ought to break
up that there evil reputashun I've got"
he grinned as he rode back and forth
The FIVE men rode single flle through
| the narrow entrance to Salt canyon,
and once within Its confines a pleasing
sight rewarded their coming.
| Around a campfire were seated half
dozen girls Most of them were
pretty, and all were attractive. The
Queenly brunette and the "peachy"
blond and the red haired damsel all
were there, as well as three others.
All of them sprang up from the pic
mic feast around which they were
gathered and viewed with alarm the
approach of the cattlemen.
Morgan was in advance, and, whip
ping off his hat with a graceful sweep,
he addressed the red haired divinity.
Excuse me, miss, but we are the
rescue party" he said pleasantly.
what you going to rescue2" de-
manded the red haired one imperious-
Iy, while the others drew close togeth-
er and giggled.
we WAS luIOiniSu IHdI SOlhO JohVW
hearted varmint had stampeded your
horses" said Morgan calmly.
YES" said the imperious one stifiy.
"It's all true, but we don't need any
rescuing. We're going to get home
| all right"
"How?''
Walk" she returned calmly. ANY
objection?"
Eyes, ma'am." said Morgan emphat-
ically. I'VE don't let ladies walk twen-
ty miles when they're out for holiday
time-not in Poregrass county"