davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
sucKsAoT was FoR RAsTus
Turkey 1o Had Given TO Mrs. Ranson
Was Tame Enough to Tat Out
Of 0ne's HAND

Rastus had called at Judge Ran
SONS house and made a present OF
o fine turkey to the judges wife.
NAB brotheh had two" he said
10 ease her susptcions. "and so he
gave ms this one"
Mrs. Ransom gave him In return
two bright silver dollars, on the CON
dition that the bird was tame tur-
key. and not the wild kind. because
the Judge detested getting his mouth
full of shot every time he wanted a
bite.
Dose turkeys was bofe Of 'em
tame enough to eat out OF yo' hand,
Mis- RANSOM said Rastus, earnestly.
That night Judge Ransom and his
wife sat down to deliciously Drowned
turkey. piping hot. At the first bite,
the Judge jumped to his feet, splitting
grape shot in all directions.
"Send for that fellowl" he shouted
wrathfully. In due time panic
stricken Rastus came In trembling.
Il sent for you. you black scoundrel,
to ask you why in the Sam Hill you
lied about that turkey not being n
wild onei Why, It was loaded with
bird shot!"N
Dem shot was intended fob me, yo'
honoh." said Rastus, humbly.--Kansas
City Star.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
AFRAID TO ASSERT AIM:E..f
Agreeable Person Assented to Every
Proposition Made TO Him Rather
Than Argue.
From New York World.

Don't you think a man Is a fool to
try to drown his sorrows in strong
liquor?"
Yes"
"And don't you think chewing to-
bacco Is an awful nasty hahit?"
Yes"
Don't you think that man who
smokes is foolish to burn up money in
that way?"
YES"
Don't you think 1t is ridiculous to
deny women the right to vote when
tramps and ignorant foreigners who
have no knowledge of our institutions
are permitted to ballotT
"Yes.".
Don't you think a woman who does
mans work as well as man could
do it ought to have mans pay?"
"Yes"
For mercy's sake why don't you
speak up and argue about something?
Haven't you an idea of your ownT' /
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
BAG KEEPS WATER COOL

Probably the Illinois man who has
invented a novel water cooler has
travelled in Australia. There all the
railroads have canvas bag filled with
water hanging from the rear plat
form. The water In these bags is
kept cool by evaporation and the
same principle applies to the water
bag seen here. This receptacle is
made of material which possesses
the peculiar quality of holding the wa
ter yet exuding enough moisture to
prevent the sun from appreciably af.
fecting the temperature Of the water.
1t requires no stretch OF imagination
to see how convenient such a. bag
would be for motorists. not only pro-
viding perennial supply of fresh.
cool water for drinking purposes, but
for replenishing the car mechanism.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
our own Minstrels.

"MistaA Walkah, wot am de diffunce
tween pantry an'-an' Mexican?"
Il give 1t up, Sam; what is the diff.
ference between a pantry and Mex
ioan2"
DE one ana larder an de- uddah
ana q greaser."
Ladies and gentlemen, the cele-
hrated baritone. Sig. Kawlfh de Kow-
come, will now sing the favorite sen.
Hmental ballad entitled. MY Heart Is
Yours, Reginald, but I'll Go Back to
Ma Before I'll Darn Your Socks"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
spoRrlNo AxIoMs.

~ the sarne be fair, the spirit
ahouid be the letter Of the law.
Game sportsmen try harder In .
tho face Of unexpected mis-
fortune.
Men who guilt under difficult
ties mover won q pennant In .
basebaH.
u 10 nct the high rollers who !
make tho highest flights In b.
planes.
Prices being equal, class has :
all tho magic OF the opening
punch.
Mover Try to be unique n lt's
going 20 make you look ridicu-
ioue.
! When you're hunting FOR The !
big game never stop 70 pIok Wild
flowers.
AIrship has ceased 70 be edl-
torisily synenynous with fool !
killer.
II takes a real optimist TO dIs- !
Germ q good omen In the wrong
turn. I
Adversely trles nnen's souls,
hus prosperity lays bare their !
hearts.
Make friends while It's yours, !
or you'll be naked whom you lose :
u.
suoeese that comes by hard J
work will not repeat automatic
ally. I
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Presence Of Mind.

Thus she reproeched him:
alfred this is the first time you
have come to see me for more than a
MONTH"
Thus he explained:
kitty, I've decided that when
young fellow can't keep from think
ing OF a girl every moment of his life
it's time for him to- quit seeing her."
"Kiss me, Alfred, dear!"
He hesitated moment-and was
lost.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Other Vacations.

How many graduated from Yale
ward this Junes"
Five hundred and ten"
"All going into professional base
ban. s'pose?"
Not at all" retorted the dean peev.
ishly. That sort of talk is becoming
offensive. We have two men who ex-
pect to be outdoors, and one man who
Is going into his fathers hardware
store
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
NEEDED A HRAcER.

A horse belonging to a resident of
Bayonne. N. j.. dropped into well
eighteen feet deep and containing six
feet of water. He landed head up, but
after the rugged derrick and hours Of
manipulation restored him to his fam.
lily, was decidedly "all In" There
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Why tha Excaptlon9

"Do spectators boot at golf gamer"
ooh, no."
do they try to rattle the players
at polo?" At ,f
Certainly not. That might cause
serious accidents"
'tDo they get abusive at tennis
match?"
you know they do not"
"Then why baseball9"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
A Poet Preferred.

my daughter wants to marry
duke"
Mine wants to marry a poet"
well, believe I'd rather support
poet than duke. From all accounts,
poet won't eat much. and I don't
think he'll want to. play the stock mar
ket all the time"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
such NerveI

Tripper (crosing from England to
Denmark) Can you speak their lingo?
Professor Yes. it's not very unlike
English, you know. The Danes left
their mark behind them when they In
vaded England.
Trfpper-The Danes invaded Eng.
land What Internal cheekI--Punch.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

The Boston American says over
81 700, 900, 600 is spent annually in
tie United States for advertising.
Great Britain and colonies spend
less than half that amount.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
LIfeIonq Eccentric pressor.

An old man who recently passed
away in Whittinsville. Wash. during
all the ss years of his life had never
worn stockings-because he hated the
feeling OF them; nor had he worn any
thing but straw hat. summer and
winter alike, to keep, as he expressed
It. rain and snow from going down his
neck.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

fore. his eloquent plea for bracer
was met with alacrity, and a. pint OF
whisky was poured down his throat,
after which he rose comfortably.
whinnied his approval of the brand,
and proceeded to demonstrate that he
never felt better In his life.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Wasted His Time

I- wasted HIS Time.
How Is your boy getting along
since he graduated?"
Poorly. He was too frivolous at
college"
Wouldn't study, eh?"
Didn't go in for the right thing.
Went in for rowing instead Of base
ball. What chance has he to get on
fat salary roll?"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
players and Writer'S.

Bobby Wallace is one Of the star
players who does not believe that
player can be good writer and .
good player at the same time. He LIS
outspoken In denouncing the effort OF
some players to write about their Eel
low players.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
BANKING av MAIL.

!. The Hyde Park Savings Bank
insists that deposits sent to that
Bank are absolutely safe.
No depositor ever lost dollar by
sending money through the mails to
the Hyde Park Savings Bank.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Good Roads Hint.

"Of course we are opposed to ma
chine methods in elections" WELL"
replied Farmer Corntossel, Il must adj
NIT that I'd like to see the steam
folier took out O. politics an put back
where II belongs I'm the road-makin'
buninesa"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

Anthony Carlo. the eighteen-year-old
left.hander. the property Of the New
ark club OF the International league,
was transferred the other day from
Terre Haute to Danville of the Three-I
league. Carlo, who started his base
bali career az bat boy for the Chica-
go cubs, attracted the attention Of
Mordecai Brown. who took him In
hand and taught him how to pitch.
In recommending Carlo to Man
ager McGinnity Brown said: THAT lad
has lot Of stun and has made rapid
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

The British four-masted bark
Midway in at New York from
Lisbon, Portugal, has on board as
cadets who are in training for the
British mercantile service.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

International league to ind greater
pair on the left side OF the diamond
than Dolan and Mcmillan. Harry VOL
Terton made q big mistake when he
let Dolan get away from the Yankees
without thorough trial.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

strides at picking up the fine points of
the game. Give him chance and
you will not regret It."
While with Terre Hante Carlo
pitched but two games, winning the
FIRST from South Bend in handy fash.
ion. The second contest was lost to
Springfield by the score of to
through an error of an outfielder, who
dropped fly, letting In two run in
the ninth inning. 1t is expected that
Manager Chance will give the boy a
try-out next year.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Better for an Concerned.

What horse is there for me this
morning, PATTI
We'll, sor. the sone you rode yester.
day is lame and the one you rode
the day before is at the vetinary's"
What did your master say / was to
ride today?"
He said you was to ride strate
car. sor."-Life.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
unueuaj Kind.

willis-what kind Of hotel does
he run? ,
Gillis--As usual. In summer you
get little room with no windows and
in winter big room with no stove"-
Judge.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Ant Comparison.

she--In way getting married is
like using the telephone. He-How
so? She--one doesn't always get the
party one wants Boston Transcript.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Pitcher Mcconnell In Demand.

Pitcher George Mcconnell must be
highly thought of as twirler by
many Of the clubs in the big leagues.
even II he Is not by the Yankees.
When the New York team asked for
waivers on him FIVE clubs in the Ma
tional and ave in the American were
willing to take him at the waiver
price.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Asked and Answered,

''What happens when you put the
dollar before the man7" bawled the
candidate.
"The man goes after It." answered
an old farmer in the crowd.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

Texas Teacher OF Infant Geography
Class John Mace may tell us what 0
strait Is.
John Mace--It's JUS tn plain stun,
'thout nothin' In it.--Judge.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

"By golly; call this rubbing It In
slow now2"
II sent this magazine two poemf
and they sent me back three"
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
cat ysaIs.d brood o. ch,ekens.

A cat on farm near Harrisburg.
Pa, lost her litter of kittens and in
place of them adopted brood OF
mine chickens which che successfully
raised BY bringing food for them and
es&dlinG elpne 30 thsm at night
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
limIt Of Badness.

Fighting and struggling FOR your
own hand 10 bad game II played by
men. but an abominable game IL
Stayed by women. --Exchange
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07

Land Of LIcorlce Root.
1Licorics root grows in abundance
the Ural territory of Russia.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
First Time george Leaves Homo.

First Time George Leaves Home.
George is always looking for OBJ
portunities to show his devotion"
YES"
He said II telegraphed him he
wanted me to be sure to send night
message Dear boy. He wants TO
sit UP all night to get It."
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Subscribe for The Age. $l.OO.
The Tribune Farmer

Is the best Agricultural paper. II comes
every week. For $1.5o we send THE AGE
and Tribune Farmer Tor one year,
THE AGE
wooosrocx vgRmorr.
Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1912-09-07
Worse.

Worse.
=, She--I got an awful shock last
night when I looked under the bed
He--You didn't see a man therei
6ha-Mercy. no! A mouse.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
Washable CIuttons,

Sundews, common in English marsh
es. are sufficiently knowing to distin
guish between various substances pre-
scented to them. Offer them n nice
scrap Of tender beef. and in couple
Of hours they will have concealed ii
from sight. Try them with a piece of
chalk or tiny pebble. and they re.
main stolidly immovabIe. Wet the
chalk and offer 1t again. and the plant
apparently mistakes 1t for meat. the
bristles gradually closing round 1t;
then. discovering the deception, they
gradually relax and return the chalk
without thanks. These vegetable glut-
tons will absorb morsels of poached
eggs and mutton chops. but cheese
turns the leaves quite black and FINAL
~ kills them.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
COSTLY COLLARS.
They Cost $500 Apiece In the Days Of
Queen Elixabeth.


Starch was never heard of in Eng
land until after Queen Elizabeth came
TO the throne This statement may
SOUND little startling. but 1t Is quite
true nevertheless. Elizabeth's father.
blum King Hal. was the first English
monarch to wear any sort of neck
band. That was very plain. about an
inch In depth. and made OF lace, Yet
only fifty years later an author of the
times. Henry Peacham. writes:
HE is not gentleman nor in the
fashion whose band of Italian work
standeth him not at least three to
four pounds. Yes, seamstress in
Holborn told me that there are some
of threescore pound price apiece"
Fancy paying such sum as $4,000
dozen for ones collars.
The original of the present starched
collar was the run In the year 1864
Queen Elizabeth first used coach.
Her coachman came from Holland.
He was man named Boenen. and his
wife brought with her from that coun-
try the art of clean starching.
Soon afterward certain Nine. Ding
ben came from the Netherlands and
started laundry with clear starch
ing In London. A very good thing
she made of 1t. for the daughters Of
worthy citizens crowded to her to
learn the art. and she charged them
f5 apiece, Five pounds was lot of
money In those days-equal to at least
500 of modern money.-London An
sYers.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
TRIPPED IN COURT
ON WORD MEANING
If Prospective Lawyer Had Owned Ev
erybody's Cyclopedia, He Would
Have Known.

A man was under examination recent
" by New York lawyer with refer
ence to his qualifications as a juror In
an important case.
DO YOU understand the lawyer
asked, what is meant by the tower OF
Babelf"
"Yes, sir" the man replied, promptly
let me have your definition OF it.
Il understand it. | tell you"
well, what is it'"
II know what il is" said the man
holly. when tell you know what
a thing is, | know it. That's all there
is about it,
81 don't want to hear any more of
that kind Of talk interposed the court.
Answer that question addressed to yo1
by counsel"
Judge, ! did the man insisted. "He
asked me if / knew what it was, and |
said | did"
"If you are sure you know what is
meant by the tower of Babel, define
it," directed the court.
Its big building in Europe" was
the answer.
The Times is distributing Everybody's
Cyclopedla. With this set Of books at
hand. there can be no excuse for not
knowing the meaning of terms common
ly used, The set comprises $4,000 sub
jects OF ready reference for daily use.
At the same time there has been no
wasted energy compiling page after page
Of practically useless material for the
purpose OF swelling the volumes SO that
they would seem bulky and important
to the eyes Of the ignorant. Every
phrase, and every word, every sentence
and line not absolutely essential to the
and effective presentation OF
the facts has been eliminated and the
explanation made strikingly clear by the
addition of abundant illustrations.
Only one coupon is required, as ex
planned under the cyclopedia coupon
printed elsewhere in this issue.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
BATHING IN AGRA JAIL.
Just Like "You Scratch My Back and
III Scratch Yours"

III scratch yours.
One of the humorous sights of India
says a contributor to the Wide World
Magazine. Is the daily bathing parade
In a native prison. In the one we wit
nessed were youthful habitual crimi
nails, varying in age from nine to ff
teen years, taking their daily dip al
Agra Jail. While the governor watches
proceedings from the shade of tree
the prisoners. each man fettered and
carrying bowl of beaten brass or
steel. are led out In double file to a
stone pavement, on each side of which
runs a shallow trough of water
At the command of a native warder
bowls are filled and waistcloths are
washed At second order the prison
ers scoop water over themselves and
then sink smartly to their launches.
one behind another, in parallel lines.
Again comes a snappy order from the
warder. and each man begins vigorous
ly to rub the back of the fellow in
front of him. When the warder judges
the massage" is complete his voice
brings the two lines to smart right
about face. still on their launches. and
the vigorous rubbing begins again. each
man doing for his fellow what his fell
low did for him.
The process. while comical. is a genu-
ine illustration of the saying. You
scratch my back and I'll scratch
yours" except. of course to the pris-
oners whose fate brings them TO the
ceive only half the treatment of their
fellows
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
His Prescription.

Boerhaaye, the greatest doctor of his
time. was anxious that it should go
forth that even the most eminent doc
tor is somewhat of "humbug" He
carefully handed the key of small
diary to his executor. babe him open II
Immediately after his decease and let
the contents 20 forth TO the world at
large. When the notebook was opened
all its pages but the last were blank.
and on that final one there was written
In large letters Directions TO Patients:
Keep your feet warm and your head
cool and trust for the rest to Provi-
dence."
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
How's This /?

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for any
case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by Halls
Catarrh Cure.
+, j. CHENEY q CO. Toledo. q.
We the undersigned, have known T. j. Che.
ney FOR the last Is years. and believe him per-
fectly honorable IN all business transactions
and financially able 70 carry out any obligations
made by his firm.
NATIONAL BANK or COMMERCE,
Toledo, ohio
Hairs Catarrh Cure is taken internally, acting
directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces OF
the system. Testimonials sent tree. Price IS
cents per bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Take Halls Family Pills Tor constipation.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
FINEST HAIR
DRESSING
FOR WOMEN
Perfectly Delightful--Full of Refreshing
and Invigorating Qualities That
Put Life, Lustre and Beauty

Into Hair.
Use PARTISAN Sage and your hsil
won't turn gray; won't look faded OF
grow thin and scraggly.
Dandruff will disappear, hair stop
falling; the scalp will become immac,,
lately white, and all germ life will be
promptly destroyed.
At dealers everywhere, so cents. Sold
by the Red Cross Pharmacy, who will
refund your money if you are not sat
isfed. The girl with the auburn hair
is on every package of PARTISAN
Sage.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
FOUR LINES FOR rs CENTS

The Times will publish Wants, Lost
and Found, For Sale. To Let, etc.--short
dvertisements-at the rate of four lines
for twenty-five cents for the first inser-
tion and FIVE cents for each subsequent
insertion.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
Did She7

DO you know anything about hyp-
notism?" asked the fluffy haired girl OF
her friend In the pink gown.
We'll" replied the fluffy haired one
ms she held up her left hand to display
sparkling solitaire to better advan.
tage. ''yod can judge for yourself
Indoe
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
How Do You Feel?

II you feel weak and languid, and trou.
bled with biliousness and indigestion, get
Baxter's Mandrake Bitters, the best lax-
ative tonic. Any drug store at 25 centsi
liquid or tablets.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
The Right Thine,

What did you do with your boob
whose leaf you found loosenedv
"Put ii through a legal process
What do You mean?"
Had it bound over to keep the
piece. "-Baitimore American.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24

The town of Shelburne thinks it has
exceeded any other town of its size in
the state in the number of marriages
this season. Since May there have
been ten weddings there, and 10 of the
20 participants have been residents OF
that town.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24

Frank G. Hunt of Orleans committed
suicide at his home in that place last
week by shooting, death being instan-
taneous Mr.. Hunt was born in Dorset
in 1852.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
ABOUT THE STATE
Happenings of Interest From Diff
ferent Sections.

The two-year-old child of Mr.. and
Mrs. Leroux of Troy fell into pail Of
boiling water Monday of last week and
was badly burned, but it is thought it
may recover.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
WEST ToPSHAM.

A. n. Fellows, a prominent citizen of
this town and village, was stricken with
paralysis Saturday night and lies in a
precarious condition.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
NOTICE.

This is to notify that | give my SON
George Stone, his time. j will not pay
any OF his bills, or collect any of his
wages after this day, his father,
OLIVER STONE.
Barre, Sept. 81, 1912.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1912-09-24
BIDS WANTED.

For the reconstruction of two walls
under the Foresters hall at East Barre;
Length of walls, 50 feet; height of walls,
s feet. For further information apply
to trustees, at East Barre.
All right reserved to reject any ana
all bids.
GEO. TAYLOR.
BERT PELKEY,
FRED LAB0UNTY,
Trustees.
East Barre, Vt.