The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-18
POLLY AND GET THE MAJORS
 VIEWS ON MINT JULEPS
Story From the Old White Sulphur sprngs-What the Ed tor Objected to-Suggestions Subsitute-some thing Horribly Vicious-Maybe the Gentleman
 Had Never Tasted Real Mint Julep
By DOLLY DALRYMpLE

If the editor would pay you to fchange it." I remarked, could you re- move the old school gentlemen from your story and substitute"
 If I did" she interrupted, it would be 2 very different story, as Kipling would say, and I refuse to mutilate art for any perfect lady sort of a man who happens to edit any Ladies Home Journal"
 But the suggestion held an interest for me, and so l persuaded Polly to go with me to call on our old friend The Major" and Mrs. Major" the next day, and get some pointers" which we did.
 How are you making it, young ladies' The Major asked. as he arose from his comfortable chair on the piazza and greeted us cordinally
 Not at all, Major" Polly replied, and began at once. Why do you know l wrote a beautiful story worth any where from a dollar and a quarter to fifteen hundred dollars (Polly doesn't know Journalistic prices, evidently) and sent 1t to an editor and 1t came back to me-"
 "Hoity- -Toityv calculated the Major Maybe your spelling wasn't good, or maybe the editor couldn't read your. writ ing. You know Mrs. Major had letter from you once and she thought it was a piece of music Hal Hal Ha. There COULDN'T be anything the matter with your story, my dea-."
 T paid a professional stenographer who knows how to spell" said Pollyl, Ito fix it up in perfect shape for me. There was another reason, Major"
 Put 1t up to him." I nodded to Polly, and make the Major tell you if Matted Milk might be substituted for Mint Juleps.'
 '"Eh, what?" he asked confused "You didn't mention Matted Milk in the same breath with Mint Juleps, did you?'
 'Of course not, the editor did that" said Polly.
 The Majors face wore an expression very like that of man who sees van- dal sitting on his great grandmothers grave eating lunch
 But my dear young lady, there is noth- ing in the world that ANYBODY could substitute for a Mint Julep," he averred.
 '"rhe world is very full of drinks these days" Polly suggested timidly. There are Honolulu Sundaes, the Summer Girls Delight, a2d all sorts of Nectarized Rose Leaves with Cream Sodas."
 Surely you are not meaning to suggest any of these as a substitute for a Mint Julep?" the Major asked.
 We thought of Matted Milk" I re- marked meekly
 "The old Milk sops one meets in a Ladies' Ter-Home Journal" the Major agreed firmly, might take It. I thought, however, we were discussing the gentle men in Miss Pollys story I don't know what this generation drinks, of course, but as for me and mine"
 What do you think of a lot of rich cream" to begin with Polly interrupted, with nuts and a heavy Chocolate syrup and--''
 "Dr. Wiley would drop dead in his tracks at such suggestion" The Major interpolated But go on."
 And powdered sugar sprinlSled on the roof of the whole thing" Polly continued, 'and a cherry as finishing touch, and"
 q believe that is always proper-the cherry in the modern drink, isn't ,it?" the Major questioned. Tt is to the Soda Foun- tain artiste what a cupola used to be to a fashionable house. Humph!"
 'Tt sounds terribly vicious. the modern drink, when you dlssect it-Poly's drink as she's just related it. I said.
 Comparatively speaking, 1t IS vicious" said the Major feelingly.
 "Comparng 1t with what?" I asked.
 Not with milk for babies" he retort- ed. "but with mans drink.
 But it seems that you can't sell story with mans drink in it." said Polly pathetically. "I suppose if I had put any smoking into 1t I should have had to explain that the men were smok- ing cubes or corn silk or whatever it is one smokes for Asthma"
 "A story is no place for a perfectly made Mint Julep," the Major said serious ly. Tt deserves a better mausoelum, my child.'
 Maybe the editor had never tasted a perfect Mint Julep," suggested Polly.
 Suppose you write an appreciation of the Mint Julep, Major, and convert him to the cause"
 "I do not have any business relations" !" the Major said, peremptorily, "or social intercourse. with the type of man who in this day and time has to read an Appre- ciation' before he can enjoy the ONLY drink for a GENTLEMAN"
 yesterday morning for a motor trip to include Chattanooga, Nashville Nam moth Cave, Chicago. Niagara and the lob