davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

The beauty doctor who says all
women can become beautiful ia
thinking OF the old adage that
Pretty Is as pretty does"
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

II those Aliens had only hit for
the mountains Of Mexico instead Of
West Virginia. they might have made
good on their recall Of judges.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

II "a going TO extremes to try to
make adverse capital out Of the pres
ident's plea for giving business a
fair chance.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

TIMBER inspecting portrait by fellow
artist1-Your treatment Of thEt blokes
pompadour gives me pam. -.
Oaker-Sort of painters coWlck, num-
Chicago Tribune.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

Governor Wilson's friends have
awaked to that joker which some Of
the other crowd slipped over on him
In the Nebraska primary deck.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

Governor Osborn 10 the first OF
those seven governors to tear for
cover. Next.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

II Ia decided not TO call J. P. Nor
gan 10 testify before the stesi COM
mittee. what's the use. after hear
Ing Uncle Andy. "a
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

Because man may have q germ
In his hat Is no proof that he has q
bee In his bonnet.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06
GRNS AND ORGANS.

Medicus-Don't you think this scien-
fife idea is a good one OF killing OH all
the idiots?
IoneIy.-Baltimore American
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

The spring cleanup should include
the back yard as well Is the front
yard.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

1t is not too late for April to fool
us yet.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06
Third Home Rule BIZ.

Third Home Rule Bill.
The actors are ready and the scenery
in place for the Introduction In the
British House Of Commons Of the prom
ised bill restoring legislative home rule
to ireland. The event is featured for
Thursday, the nth inst. with Prime
Minister Asquith in charge of the meas
ure. On two former occasions home rule
bills were introduced In the commons
the first by Prime Minister Gladstone in
1856 and the second by the grand old
man In 1850. The first met defeat in
the commons by a division OF the liberal
party on the issue raised. The second
measure was passed in the commons by
a substantial majority. but was rejected
by the House Of Lords. In the succeed
ing nineteen years the energy and skin
OF home rulers were directed toward
eliminating the power OF the peers. It
was a long, wearying. nerve-racking
watch for opportunities to batter the
walls Of hereditary privilege and power.
With courage. patience and unity the
Irish nationalists pressed the struggle In
every direction calculated to uproot or
weaken this dominant power. supporting
every measure Of progressive reform
brought forward by the ministry. In due
time the persistent opposition of the peers
10 beneficial measures forced the issr.-
OF ending or mending the House Of Lords
to vote OF the people resulting in the
triumphant return OF the liberal ministry
q year ago. The restricted veto power
OF the peers for the first time makes
possible the recovery OF home rule for
ireland. While the peers possessed CO.
ordinate power the chances Of such a
measure being passed by the House Of
Lords were below zero. Should the
coming measure command the united sup
port Of the liberal party groups its pas
sage by the commons at three successive
sessions VIII make II law In two years,
regardless OF the opposition OF the peers.
The general provisions OF the bill have
been published. but many important de-
tails relating TO finances, customs,
judicial and police control. are reserved
for the Introductory speech.
Struggle Of . Century.
Ono hundred and twelve years ago the
Irish Parliament, packed for the pur-
nose d.creed n. own death for a price.
The record az that infamy. recorded in
the ..n,,rk IJ,,. bv Harrington. forms
the most shameless oh apter Of English
n,urssr ev,r perpetrated IN Ireland.
Rarr,nv,on nlaces the cash cost of the act
~ union a, n $40 COO most Of which went
- 3 cor,h,n. ~ s,x,ee, corsplrators. BE-
,,a,. N. cash disbursements. the official
.no,,. d,.,r,hut.d included two bIshoprics.
fifty-n,ne valuable offices. twice that
number of minor offices. fourteen colo
nelc,.s one Of which went 10 Sir Edwin
packenbam. whom General jackson
smashed a, New Orleans fourteen years
after, eighteen peersges. forty-one Judge
sbins two eeperaIo,es and two barone,.
cIes From the hour Of the betrayal Of
ireland. effective on January /. isoi. al
most to the close Of the nineteenth CEN
tury the people were subjected to every
spec,es Of coercion laws that deyilish In
r.nu,,y could invent. Oppression. repres-
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

But. speaking of dreadnaughts
and warships. folks dread not rea-
sonabie appropriations.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

why do you take such fiendish de-
light in fiddling while Rome burns!
Cant you seer responded Nero. Dur
ing my performance I am roasting the
music critics. Star.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

The Passerby-You took great risk
neeie medal. WHAT prompted you to
do il? -.
The Hero-He had my skates on.-Puck.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

"Scraggs borrows my paper every
morning
"Yes?'
manner that its politics are an wrong
and that il carries too much advertising.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

II always like to have him come to
the house"
That so? Why?" ..
Sometimes he talks for a whole even
ing without once mentioning the polittcaf
situation. Detroit Free Press.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06
Aftermath OF /. strike.

A permanent and fsr-reaching result
OF the coal miners strike in Great Britain
10 noted by the London correspondent Of
the New York Post In the impetus given
oil as fuel. There was an unprecedent-
edly large attendance at the institution
Of Mechanical Engineers 10 hear DR.. Ru-
dolph Diesel give an account Of his oil
engine. and the newspapers have been de-
voting columns Of their space to the sub
ject. When the seiandis, a S.eoo-ton oil
driven steamer. appeared in the London
docks a few weeks ago. there was good
deal OF sensational talk about the de-
thronement Of King Coal and the doom Of
that commercial and industrial prosperity
which had rested so largely upon our coal
supply. DR.. Diesel himself thinks this a
groundless scare. England. he points out,
viii always have an advantage In her
mineral wealth. inasmueh Is her coal
fields are q vast oil reservoir. The coal
tar now being produced In Great Britain
and largely wasted. contains oil enough
to keep the entire British navy supplied
with liquid fuel
DR.. Diesel foresees the day when all
coal brought TO the surface will be con-
verted probably at the pit head, into gas
coke and oil. The oil will be largely used
for driving engines TO generate electricity
In bulk. This will mean an immense
economy in the use OF coal, and conse-
quent postponement Of the date when the
national supplies will be exhausted.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06
In Other Lands

Some Side Lights On what 10
TrsnsptrinG Among ths NEAR
and Far Nstions Of the xaxth.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

what makes you jump out SO unex-
pectedly and race around the yard with
a lawn mower? asked the neighbor.
whenever / get to reading" replied
Mr.. Crosslots, ''the hired girl Frances
around with a carpet sweeper and | have
to get even in some way"-Washington
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06
Military spirit In Paris.

Military spirit In Paris.
A Partisan correspondent. writing to a
London Journal comments upon the ex-
traordInary new spirit recently devel-
oped IN France. as exhibited at IN, re-
cent spring review at ylncennes Of the
regular Paris garrison He says: 'Foe
two hours or 50 soldiers made Ehat
were almost triumphai marches across
Paris. Three-quarters Of the nuge crowd
at vIncennes waited to escort the troops
home. Along the boulevard an hour or
two later one heard tramping. cheers
and bands In the distance Then q small
Civilian army came In sight. marching In
time. and more or less In self-imposed
rank and file. with a swarm Of cyclists
towering around AL had walked, or
slowly cycied. the whole way from VIM
cennes with the troops. and saw hun
dreds OF women in their Sunday best.
who had also tramped with the soldiers.
Each regiment was preceded. followed
and entirely surrounded by q marching
crowd. and the officers On horseback
rode completely hemmed In By men and
Soys. ] repeat that I have never seen
such demonstration Of military patriot
lam m Paris before. The change IN the
French national temper since last sum-
ner b . remarkable European event.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1912-04-06

Mrs. Struckit Rich-Our walter Is
student. He is working his way through
college. 49,
Mr., Struckit Rich-You don't tell me!
Well, II the colleges would only turn out
few more good walters I'd have more
respect for them seats OF learning
Puck. ra'
81 never saved a dollar until was
married"
And now?'
Now never have one that feel that
can afford TO spend. Detroit Free
Press
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
SURFACE DRAINAGE
FOR GOOD ROADS
Iowa Authority Tells How Roads
Should be Handled for the
Best Results.

Professor j. r. Davidson of the
Iowa Agricultural college, who is an
authority on the drainage of highways
to those interested in the construction
of good roads, says that all roads
should be provided with surface drain
age.
The cross section should be of such
a shape as to shed all rain at once to
the side bitches. To do this the road
must be oval or have crown and
must be smooth. The first of these is
matter of construction and the lat
ter matter of maintenance. The side
drainage system should be called up
on to carry as much water as posi-
Bile. Water cannot be carried away
by the tile drains until the water has
sunk through the soil and softened 1t.
The crown of road should be suffi-
cient to shed the water readily. II
the road is to be maintained and kept
free from ruts and holes less crown
will do than If the road is to be ne
elected. The Iowa highway commits
sion recommended slope one inch to
foot for crown in the Travelled
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
sfElennents
hat
VIM
DIR. j. w. POTTER
Trinity M. e. Church
Friday Evening
June q
ADMISSION ESQ
ADMISSION ESQ


way. This is sufficient for most condi-
tions. The crown should not be too
great.
A steep crown causes the travel to
be concentrated at the center, where
ruts will be worn and washing result
Again, there is some difficulty IN
vehicles passing. On the side OF the
crown the wheels of the vehicles
have a tendency to grind the road
down. This action, together with the
swerving or flow action of the lower
| part of the wheel, has very marked
i effect.
| The sleeper the slope Of the road
the more important the crown, for
there is tendency for the water to
run down the track rather than to the
l.side. If water once begins to run
down the center Of the roadway it Is
but a short time until the road Is
quilted out.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
Yelled for Smith.

This story was told by Adjt. Gen.
Dixon at a recent political meeting and
banquet in Chicago. AS he rose to
speak he noticed that one of the men
present was candidate for Office in
that campaign.
He said: This occasion reminds
me of meeting held in the Thirty
second ward.
The meeting was packed and an
cid seedy parsonage was sitting in
about the second row from the front
AS a candidate for city treasurer was
introduced and began to make his
talk, this old fellow shoted ct the tor
of his voice, Smith, Smith Will
some difficulty one of the ushers pre-
vailed upon the old fellow to keel
quiet for the time being.
| Then candidate for mayor wal
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
LONG HEADS INDICATE
LOVE FOR THE SEA
Present Day Explorers Show Signs
Similar to Those of the Old
Viking Kings.

The portraits of Captain Amundsen
show certain likeness to DR.. hansen.
Both have a marked degree the long
narrow skull of the Vikings. 1t is a
curious circumstance that the seafar-
ing race whether on the Baltic or on
the Mediterranean have this type
of head, while the inlanders of Europe
are predominantly of the broad headed
Alpine sort.
But it will hardly dc to make long
headedness the cause of seamanship
as some enthusiasts have done, for
the Japanese, who are round headed
take readily to the sea.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
..sRicHAm" YOUNG vIcoRs
Refuse All Substitutes.


STATE OF MISSOURI. County Of
Clark.--ss.
l, Lewis Coleman, sworn on my
oath, say, am Al years of age. Three
years ago became badly afflicted
with Kinney and Bladder troubles,
my back hurt me SO bad l could not
sit up, could scarcely urinate and
then small quantities, with hard
efforts. although having to respond to
the call of nature every hour. After
trying other medicine, | commenced
taking brigham" Young Vigors, and
the improvement in my health began
Immediately; and after l had taken 6
or boxes, / was entirely we'll; and
fearing the return of my affection, l
took 2 or boxes more, and since
that time l have had no indication
of any trouble with my kidneys and
bladder whatever.
l further swear / am paid nothing
directly or Indirectly for this affidavit.
and if some other poor sufferers are
cured by means of reading what cured
me / feel that I am well paid for the
testimonial. LEWIS COLEMAN.
Subscribed and sworn to before me
this Gath day of December, 1910
(seaD. N. T. CHERRY,
Circuit Clerk.
Never accept substitute.
For Sale by, l, C. Reeves, 326 Main
ST.. and other Keokuk dealers.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
HARRY TALLEY
GOES TO SING
Young Man Of keokuk Goes to Mime
sofa to Conduct the Music for
Evangelist.

Harry Talley, who has developed
into a popular singer, goes to Worth
ington, Mimi, to take charge of the
singing there at series of evangelis-
tic services to continue four weeks.
Mr.. Talley is a worthy young man
and has gained much favor in local
musical circles for the excellence of
his voice and musical culture, and is
to be congratulated on this recogni-
ton Of his gifts in that line. His
friends are sure that he will succeed
in his new venture and are confident
that he will win success and laurels
in his role as singing evangelist.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
ONE ATHLETE Is
sEASICK ON TRIP
Champion Discus Hurier is Unable TO
Practice With Other Members
- 49,. - pa.rd Shln - :. rs

Champion DISCUS f1urscT 10 0Hdb'e "
Practice With Other Members
OF Team on Board Ship.
UNITED Press Leased Wire Service ]
ABOARD THE STEAMSHIP FIN
LAND, bound for Stockholm,
BY wireless via siasconsett.
June b.. H. Duncan, New
York, unattached, the champion
discus thrower. was the only one
among the American Olympic athletes,
who was sea-sick today. Duncan was
unable to take part in the general
training and practice that turned this
staid liner into a ship load of novel
activity. The stars all began serious
training under the coaches at 10
o'clock. The cracking Of rifles, and
patter of revolver shots, mingled with
the patter of the runners. the soft
thuds of the bumpers, the splashes
from the improvised swimming pool
and the tapping OF the tennis balls
made chorus Of sounds strange al
sea.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
Only Problem Of Happiness.

Real happiness is SO simple that
most people do not recognize it. They
think It comes from doing something
on big scale, from a big fortune, or
from some great achievement, when,
In fact, 1t is derived from the simplest.
the quietest the most unpretentious
things in the world. Our great prob
lem is to fill each day so full of sun
shine, OF plain living and high think
ing, that there can be no commences
or unhappiness in our lives Orison
Sweet Marden,
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
Games Today and Tomorrow.
Keokuk at ottumwa.
Hannibal at Muscatine.
Kewanee at Burlington.
Galesburg at Monmouth.
Especial to the Gate City.]

tTTUMWh. June f5.-Ottumwa
took the cpsI ing game from the In
dams Today in Il heavy hitting contest
with Gregory and Whitaker as the
opposing s'ai men. Doctor Sullivan
was the big lrn for the Speed Boys,
getting four Its in as many trips to
the plate
Whitaker was ineffective while
Grescry held Htokuk TO four hits, win
s ming = to 1. Kensel's double with a
single by Sullivan and Senno's sacri-
flee sccreS two runs in the third.
Wise sccr,l o: singles by himself and
Link in the fourth Gregory was chas-
ed III ahead CT sullivan's home run IN
the fourth and Kline scored on his
single AMI Wise's terrific double in the
sixth Keokuk's lone score was I'M
earned Kelly was hit and Agur's err
ror Of l,,lein. MT gave him second !.
Ililly's single put Kelly on third and
passed hall sermitted him to count.
The fielding features were staged by
Wise, Manusll and Kelly. Bresnahan
IN eyai:ng a wild pitch turned his
ankle and retired in the fourth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16

shouted your representative, when thel
plucky fireman had completed his
performanc
"Righto," added the fireman. and
you're a good judge said he.
"Are you going to redeem the white
race, Or put it further down In the
dumps?" dexteriously aueried your
man. YES modestly assented the
challenger.
I'm for you," again cautiously said
your reporter. Right you are. Slim,
quickly retorted Mr.. Flynn.
"Of course he's bigger than yo4
are said the reporter Sure" an
swered the fist rammer but the big
ger they are, the harder they fall 4
You look to be in condition. again
flatteringly unused your representa-
tive "'Condition' is right" urged
| Mr.. Flynn. How much will you get
out of it?'' said your man. Nothing
! nothing at all. All want is to
4 fight, and Jack Johnson is the partic-
ular person against whom have a
! grudge at the present time" Well
put in your correspondent, you ap-
4 pear to be a fighter for fair All :
4 assented Flynn, Fight is my right
Nance and | was born on battle
field and raised on diet of buckshot
and dynamite, with nitro-glycerine for
J dessert. Do you get me?" Il get you
JIM" answered your correspondent.
!. Gate City is IGNORED.
: Mr.. Flynn, after emphasizing his in
h tentions on July 4th. offered your rer
/ resentative the privilege of donnin
the gloves for few rounds sparrin
with the white hope. Your correspon
dent, not being up to his fightin
b weight, and being of rather taciturl
e turn Of mind, very profusely declined
r but not, however, until after he as
e sured Mr.. Flynn that at some futur
e date he would be pleased to exchang
e few friendly wallops with him.
r well, that beats me- said you
t correspondent to himself as he turn
Z, ed to leave the place. And that |
s going to beat Jack Johnson, too an
e turning, your representative saw tina
}. none other than Tommy Ryan, tn
y former and undefeated middleweigh
d champion of the world was the autho
e of the echo They shook hands Wig
orously and Mr.. Ryan escorted him t
Q the gate. "Ycu see it's like this e.
e planned Ryan "the smoke is due TO
e fall. and the fireman is due for
g raise, and of course, (this very conf
IDENTIFY, when the fireman starts in 0
g the smoke, there will be dissipatio
d of the smoke, and when the smoke
y battle lifts from the field, the stan'
a ing of the white race will be rehabil
l. tated whatever that means, and Their
e will be new champion
t $50 long" said Ryan, as your rel
IS resentative beat it down the road.
K GOOD NIGHT" calculated yor
man.
y Next week your corresponder
p hopes to get in touch with bot
le camps, and further expects to be
Of fine condition to attend the big fus
on July 4th. and to furnish your rea
ers with heretofore imprinted goss
of the prize ring.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
Summary.

Summary.
Home ru1l- Sullivan
Two base t..it Kensel. and Wise.
Sacrifice hst-Kensel.
sacfif,cc fly Senno.
Stolen tases--Link.
Bases on rails-Off Gregory 2, off
Whitaker i.
Struck gu; by Gregory s.; by
Whitaker q.
l'onhlc pa, Whitta - to Ke'iy.ic
Murray
fassetl hslis-Link II j summs s.
Wild Eitch- Gregory
Rali;-W,, ,u';sr.
Hit by Ii'ct er-Ry Gregory, Ke ".
W, i.e--Asar
Tine Of s ,le1:32
Attendance 's6.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16

introduced, and he had hardly proceed
ed to talk when the old fellow, sitting
in the second row, again began to yell,
Smith, Smith!
Finally Mr.. Smith entered the hall
amid great applause and took his place
on the stand When Mr. Smith had
launched upon his talk this old fellow
again yelled Smith, Smith, The
usher Immediately strobe toward the
old fellow and said Now, keep quiet.
that's Smith up there now
lie old fellow said, That isn't
Smith; that's the fellow that gave me
So to yell for Smith. -
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1912-06-16
stahIsc silver.

United Press Leased Wire servlce.1
CHICAGO, June. 15.At the game
between the Red Sox and the White
sox Aeic this afternoon, Jake stahl,
Ice Boston manager, was presented
with chest of silver by White Sox
Inns n / ists life Stahl Is south
Side barker