davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
catfish's Bite Kills Man.

Philadelphia, Pa, Jan. 27.-Dis-
patches received by friends here an
nornee The death at st. Lucie, Fla,
OF isaac A. Sweigard from blood poi.
so7lng following a bite from a cat
nsr. Mr. Sweigard was general man
ager OF the Philadelphia & Reading
railroad for many years, retiring in
1so0s
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

The political puzzle which faces the
republican party is somewhat perplex-
ing. Shall 1t nominate Taft, the con-
sentative? Shall it nominate Bob"
La Toilette. the fighting progressive?
Or shall It nominate Theodore Roose-
welt, the slap-stick comedian? Don't
all answer at once.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Dear Mrs. Thompson-Will you
kindly tell me why, when combing
or handling my hair, it will snap and
crack and fly as though it were
blown by the wind? Even the
switch will do the same. 1t is made
from combings saved for IL years.
Some days It is worse than others.
It will either cling to my waist or
follow the brush and comb and ac-
tually wind around my waist and
the comb will crack after leaving my
hair. The other evening, out of
curiosity, I combed my hair briskly
in the dark and sparks flew from it.
Please tell me the cause of this.
INFORMATION.
1t is the electricity in your hair
which makes 1t act as you say. Elec-
tricity is life and therefore your
hair is full of life. The reason why
the switch does the same is because
you very likely comb it with the
same comb used on your hair.
Dear Mrs. Thompson-Please tell
me how to be always happy.
MERRY MAID.
By some your question might be
considered a sumner. 1 have an
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

The only actual crime charged
against President Taft is the use OF
federal patronage to further his re-
nomination. This offense Is so mild
that we do not longer wonder that he
is too good for his party.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
There has been nothing nublisha.

There has been nothing published
so far about Brother Charles arriv-
ing on the scene "unobtrusively" in
the pleasantries between President
Taft and the Duke of Connaught.
But you can bet your last red cent
Brother Charles butted in some
Uhere
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
Shrewd Clara.

Shrewd Clara.
Ibid you hear about the mean trick
Clara played on Maude?'
mo. What was itP'
you know Maude intended to ask
Jack to the leap year dancer"
YES"
well, Clara told her that Jacks doc
tor had forbidden Jack to dance"
"ReallyT'
Eyes. Then Clara invited Jack her
self"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27


Dear Mrs. thompson should
like to get married and have a home
Of my own, but 1 am in love with
half dozen girls and their attrac-
tiveness allows no choice. 1 cannot
tell which one l prefer. Please ad-
wise me how to decide. WILL.
Under the circumstances, the best
plan is to put the girls names in a
hat, close your eyes and draw one.
Let fate decide, since you can't.
Probably anyone of them will be too
good for you.
Dear Mrs. Temporarily was
Solomon called the wisest man that
ever lived. INQUIRER.
1t is recorded that Solomon had
700 wives. Doubtless he learned
part of his wisdom, at least, from
them.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
THE ROCK ISLAND ARGUS SATURDAY, JANUARY 27 1912
Hurnor and
Philosophy
- DUNCAN ~. SHIFTS
JUST VARIETY.

NOTHING new, they tell us,
~ Underneath the sun:
Everything has been done
Every single one.
But you may discover
On a closer view
Pleasant variations
Quite as good as new.
Take a joke that's ancient,
Stale and almost fiat,
Dress it up a little
In a summer hat
And a swell kimono
That the date mark hides;
At its latest antics
You will split your sides.
Listen to q lecture,
Hear a pretty song
Or perhaps a sermon,
II it's not too long.
Though the theme is messy.
They will make a hit
II in different settings
They are made to fit
Every theme and fancy.
Every tune and rime.
May have been exploited
Once upon a time.
But that doesn't matter
If they come across
Served in variations
With a different sauce.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

may resolve itself into one Of ample
safeguards for passenger trains.
One trouble with the railroads of to-
day is over-crowded business and an
inclination to push the freight bust
ness-which is the money end-at
any cost.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Reciprocity.
Brown ana Jones seem to be very
intimate lately. What's the explana
tion?'
''Oh, a sort of mutual benefit asso-
citation"
LAS howw
Zones wants an Office in the lodge,
and Brown wants to unload mining
stock"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

The United States supreme court
has decided that beer may be shipped
into dry territory. Among the
"wets" at least this decision should
settle the dust Of discomfort.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

McCutcheon novel, there is the usual
financial department, stage comment
Dy Matthew White, Jr., the able edi-
uorlals' and a general fund of small
stories.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Taft is far ahead OF Roosevelt. The
two Oklahoma delegates are for him
and South Carolina has Endorsed him.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Before suggesting government own
ership OF telegraph lines, Mr.. Hitch
cock should have asked Bryan to re-
lease the copyright.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
To Be Agreeable.

To Be Agreeable.
"Do you believe in woman suffrage"
Eyes, on Thursdays and Sundays"
"Why on those days more than 9TH
ers?"
"Then is when 1 call on my best
girl"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
BY THE J. w. POTTER CO.

TERMs.-Dally. 10 cents per week.
Weekly, 81 per year In advance.
Complaints of delivery service should
be made to the circulation department
which should also be notified in every
instance where It is desired to have
paper discontinued. as carriers have no
authority in the premises.
All communications OF s-gumentative
character. political or religious. must
have real name attached for publca-
tion No such articles will be printed
over fictitious signatures.
Telephones in all departments: Central
Union, West 145 and 1145: Union Elec-
trio. 5I45.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
Jan. ~ in American
History

1S51-John James Audubon, ornitholo-
gist of worldwide eminence, died;
born 1880.
lS91-Jervis McEntee, distinguished
painter, died; born 1928
1s93-Hon. James Gillespie Blaine,
statesman and distinguished Re-
publican leader. died; horn 1870.
1910-Indictment of the New York
World in the Panama libel case
quashed in the United States cir.
cult court in New York city.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

The campaign promises to bring
out a multitude of candidates-and
Dick Yates.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

No matter what a womans aim may
be, the result is pretty sure to be
m!scue.
The man who wants but little here
below has been almost entirely super
seeded by the man who, wants the
earth.
1t wouldn't make so much difference
near akin to the present and so related
to the future.
The fellow who is profiting by it isn't
the one to make a roar about q mis-
take.
The man who knows when he is
licked is pretty likely to stay licked.
The trouble with most Of Us is that
we can't in any way contrive to make
our debts pay our expenses.
One way to get wisdom is to stop be-
ing foolish.
II you keep your mouth shut you
won't have to eat your own words.
Keep a good heart. 1t IS handy
thing to have around the house.
Have you a weak throat? II so, you
cannot be too careful. You cannot
| begin treatment too early. Each cold
makes you more liable to another anC
the last is always the harder to cure
II you will take Chamberlain's Cougl
Remedy at the outset you will b.
saved much trouble. Sold by all drug
| gists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Where He Draws the Line.
"She is certainly beautiful. l wish
she were mine"
Huh. l don't wish she were mine
just as she is"
why"
Because she is widow"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
Saturday, January 27, 1912

Happy the man who has a ton OF
coal, a pound Of butter and dozen
eggs.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
Ambiquous.

Ambiguous.
Whom did he marryT
"a farmers only daughter"
SIS she beautiful"
Eyes. The farm has about thou
sand acres"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
THE ARGUS.

Second avenue, Rock Island. Ill len.
tered at the postofnce as second-class
matter.I
Rock Island Member of the Associated
Press.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

81 can't earn any money"
Cant you? That isn't my Difficult.
ty."
whats yours?"
81 can't get it after earn it."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
HEART aid
HOME
PROBLEMS
T

'It is the real Joy of friendship
that one may think out loud to a
friend"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27
Some Weeks Later,

Well, do you think you win the bet
With some degree of ease?
Good resolutions working yet?
Sit up and notice, please.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

All the news all the time-The Argus.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

Keep a good heart. 1t IS a handy
thing to have around the house.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-27

No matter what a woman's aim may
be, the result is pretty sure to be a
m.scue.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
20 ATLANTANS GO
TO COMMERCE FOR
FOUR-COUNTY FAIR

Five autos carrying twenty persons,
left Atlanta this morning for Com
Tnerce. where the representatives of the
Atlanta Chamber of Commerce will aid
the residents of that city in observing
Atlanta day at the Fourt County
fair
John S owens and Walter G. Coop
er. director and secretary of the Cham
. Der Of Commerce will speak for that
body at Commerce. while others in the
party VIII also probably be called upon
by the managers of the fair
A barbecue Will be given by Com
merce in honor of the Atlanta visitors
and the entire day will be given over
10 the exploitation of the states CAPT
tai. The party will return tonight,
Those in the party were John s.
Owens, w. G. Obear, Miss Conela
Cooper. w T, Waters, Jr.. j. c. Veal
l.. S. Crane, Frank T. Galloway r. l..
Foreman. Emmett James, r. A. Hol-
brook, DR. c. A. Constantine, John ].
woodside. John J. Woodside. Jr., w. r.
Jester, ]. W. Hill, Mrs. J. ". Hill e.
Fl Thornton, F, o. Foster and II. II.
Sehaul
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
What Women Want to Know
BY Nine. D'MlIle.

'Superfiuous hairs on face or forearms
can be instantly and painlessly removed
by single application Of a paste made
by mixing delatOne and water. Cover the
hairs with the paste. leave on two min
ptes, wipe of, wash the surface in warm
water, and the hairs are gone
Many suffer from tired. sore swollen
or aching feet. Nothing will give quick
er relief than Mothers Salve. 1t is easy
To use, quick to act 1t relieves pain in
any part Of the body--headache, back
ache or sore muscles.
'Penciling the eyebrows is unsatisfac-
tory and unneceSSarV To make them
grow darker and thicker, gently MASSAGE
with pyroXin. II applied to the lash roots
with the finger tips, the lashes viii grow
long and silten.
japanese women never have hair on
the face or suffer from sunburn or
freckes. They seldom use face powder
but rely almost solely upon a lotion made
by dissolving a package of mayatone in
half-ptnt Of witch hazel Applied in the
morning, this holds all day and keeps
the skin soft, smooth and satiny
Too much moisture causes the hair to
lose color, become dry and brittle and fall
out Dry shampooing invigorates the
roots. Mix four ounces of orris root with
a package of thereoX. Sprinkle a little of
the mixture on the head. brush out, and
the hair will he clean, sweet, fluffy lus-
trouS ana easy TO do up. (Advt y
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
NINE. PAT II, OLD,
BREADS CAMEL A
Famous Singer. Now Near 70,
ShrinkS From All to Hide
Loss of Beauty.

CARLSBAD. oct l7-Adelina Patti.
Baroness Cederstrom. now in her seven
tieth year. has developed a dread of pho
tographers which comes near TO being a
mania it has just become known here.
During her annual visit for the cure
the prima donna. whose voice was unriv-
allied for more than 80 years, locked her
self up in morbid seclusion. receiving few
visits and declining all invitations. even
those Of royalty.
The reason is that she hates to have
any one that at last she is an old
woman. in looks as well as in actual
years She has not allowed her picture
to he taken since the last Of her beauty
vanished. which was only a few years
ago Now wreck OF her former self.
she is filed with regrets for the comph-
ments she was used to receive in her
earlier sixties, on her eternal youth
II is four years since PATHS voice was
heard in Carlsbad Then she sang
Home. Sweet Home, for some charitable
purpose, but il was a sad affair Last
year she lived in a hotel. There was an
other prima donna living there, and this
lady occasionally sang Home, sweet
Home" at the. open window. Passersby
thought it was Patti and stood still and
spplaudeo.
That enraged Patti, and she vowed
never again to live in a hotel. These
and other vagares give color to the re-
port that her strong mind has broken
with her voice and her looks.
Patti, on the last of her famous fare
well tours" of America, was besieged with
the question, How do YOU keep your
beauty, TO this she replied.
Up To 40 ate and lived as / chose
Since then / have eaten no red meat and
have drunk only white wine and soda,
When i feel weak a glass of champagne
picks ne up. ] never touch spirits OF
liaueurs / drink a great deal of water
NV de- consists chiefly Of light food
and white meat such as sweetbreads
sleeps brains. fowl and vegetables.
sleep with the window wide open summer
and winter An elaborate toilet at night
Is essential"
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17

Miss Evelyn Jackson's School Of Mu-
sic will give its first recital Of the sea
son at her studio this evening at
o'clock The pupils taking part will be
Misses Kate Richardson. Jeanette Vic
tor, Isabel Baldwin, Mary Brock NAL
lard. Margaret McCaTty, Irene Schies-
niger Alice McClung, Margaret Bald
win. Annie Johnson. Elizabeth Blaloch
Katherine Blake, Mary Stewart. Caro-
line Benjamin. Mabel Wikle. Marion
Dunson, Mary Louise Henking. Irene
King Ruth Weegard and Helen NC
CartN. and Mr. James Howard Cole
A meeting of the Musical associa =
tion viii be held on Friday evening at
the Piedmont hotel 10 discuss winter
plans. This meeting is called by the
president, Mrs. John Marshall Slaton.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
N. GEORGIA TOWNS TO HAVE
"a HOUR ELECTRIC SERVICE

HARTWELL GA. oct. 1.-THE board
of aldermen has sold the city electric
plant TO the J. 3 McCrary Company. of
Atlanta. This company is now preparing
TO develop water power on the Hudson
river near Royston, and has already Sc
cured contracts for furnishing light and
power to Royston, Canon and Levonia.
A steam auxiliary plant is now being
installed at Canon, about ten miles from
Hartwel, TO supply light and power until
the plant at the river is ready for use
next spring. The plant here will be sup
plemented by the auxiliary plant at Canon
until the plant at the river is ready A
twenty-four hour service is promised by
the company by December I.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
A WONDERFUL
Bargain Rocker
7=DAV Sale of Regular $40 Upholstered c. No
A UHA Rockers for only GUa7O

Friday and Saturday oNLY-tomorrow and day-re-
member just two days, long they last
handsome Rockers at
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
PARIS NEWSPAPER MAN
Is WOUNDED IN A DUEL

PARIS. oct. LEON Blum. a the
atrical man, fought a duel in the ParCe-
dez Princes with Pierre Weber, The
New York Heralds art critic. and
wounded him dangerously in the abdo-
men. Blum and Weber disagreed over
the merits Of a theatrical rehearsal.
The meeting was a II a. m, much
later than usual for such affairs. be
cause Webber positively refused to
leave his bed before his regular hour
for rising
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
o. 90 % CENTS CASH
%Os ~ $1.OO A WEEK

Rocker is strongly made of heavy pieces of hardwood
shed in fine quartered oak boed together for strength
padded well for comfort oil tempered springs
shaped and fashioned for style and beauty We have only
this saemay have this this bargain
don't fail to pick yours Every got will be
shown the windows and you have your
ton of the you Only Is in the
lot and they go fast SO ST 90 week for
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17

Made exactly shown of Solid Birch finished in fine MI
tine grade of leather strong steel spring construction
perfectly smooth that dust lodges anywhere This
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17

The Inman Park Student club viii
meet tomorrow morning al 10:3G
O'Clock at the home of Mrs. A. J. Kiser
S26 DeKalb avenue
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
FUTURE EVENTS

There will be a subscription dance at
the Brookhaven club on Thursday
evening. October "a. the dance to be
omitted this evening
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1912-10-17
Fortunes in Faces.

There's often much truth in the say
ing, Her face is her fortune" but it's
never said where pimples, skin erup-
tons. blotches or other blemishes dis
figure It. Impure blood is back of
them all, and shows the need OF DIR.
Kings New life Pills. They promote
health and beauty Try them. % cents
at all druggists (AdvtO
The fool-killer., 1912-11-01
A SERMON ON RAT-TRAPS.

The Public Health Service at
Washington is making an official
collection of rat-traps.
So says news item.
All right.
It does me good to see our
solemn statesmen taking an inter-
est In rat-traps.
They already have on hand
collection of several hundred and
sixteen varieties, ranging in ap-
pearance all the way from a Nc
Cormick reaper to left handed
thimble.
And that reminds me-
/ am the sole owner of a rat
trap that ought to be in the gov
ernment's collection.
/ bought it from an agent last
week.
The agent was very beautiful
young man.
His smile STUCK out three feet
on each side of his face, and he
also had his tongue with him.
This altogether charming young
buck came staving into my think
atorium one morning last week,
throwed ''Howdy" at me from
the front steps, but I lodged and
it broke out a back window.
Then he opened his sample
case and began to run off at the
mouth as follows:
Hello, Mister Editor. Man,
doggon your old skin, I've just
dropped in to sell you a rat-trap.
The fool-killer., 1912-11-01
VOL. Ill.
DREAMING OF GROVER.

On, the lies are all told and the votes
are all cast,
And the bosses sham-battle is over;
The Dimmycrat rooster is growing at
last,
And Pm dreaming tonight of old
Grover.
When think of the years of Repub-
hcan graft,
And the way that the poor have
been treated,
/ rejoice in the fall of the kingdom of
Taft,
And Pm glad that his gang was de-
feated.
But thunder and lightning! Why
should we be glad?
And how will our burdens be lesser?
We're only exchanging the chains we
have had
For the chains of a different op-
pressor. ..
We've been mighty hungry and hope
less and blue,
But now from the Dimmycrat graft
We will get few rags and a meat
skin or two, viz.
And the promise of heaven here
after.
Now heaven, no doubt, is a good place
to go
When the battles of life are all oyer
But it's hell for the poor man that
lives here below,
So I'm dreaming tonight of ole
Grover.
The fool-killer., 1912-11-01
"Uncertain as He'll"

often hear some of the linn
ber-tongued, linguistic lollipops
remarking that so-and-so is sas
uncertain as hell" Now look here,
you shallow-braine course
mouthed, rotten-hearted lump Of
mortal mud, do you have anyidea
now uncertain hell is? Life, and
friends, and money, and a great
many other things may be uncer-
tain. Life is as full of uncertain
ties as a dog is of feas. But if
there is any. truth in the old fam
lily Blble-and some of us are fools
enough to believe there is then
1t occurs to me that hell must be
reasonably sure thing. So if you
snotty-nosed sinners don't want
your tat fried in the devils old
skillet, you'd better watch out.
The fool-killer., 1912-11-01

Full as a Tick.

Lord Wilson, Ilong to be perfectly
fat;
want to come in there and hang up
my hat;
Invite me to dinner, and do it right
quick
Now feed me, and shall be full as
tick.
Here letno internal Republican dwell,
And don't give the Teddyites nary a
smell;
To get this good eating thy feet I
would lick
Now feed me, and Ishall be full as q
Lord Wilson, look here how imploring
/ come,
And help mezto lengthen my belly
band some;
I've tasted so long I am nervous and
Now feed me, and shall be full as a
tick.
The fool-killer., 1912-11-01
YES, I'M SOME PREACHER
MYSELF. i

A preacher is usually judged
by the size of his audience, and if
he can get four or five hundred
of the brethren and sisteren out
to hear him toot his gospel horn
once or twice a month, he thinks
he is a pretty bang-up preacher.
And each member of the flock is
expected to shell out a dollar or
two about every so often to help
grease Che gospel gimlet.
That's all very nice and proper,
no doubt, and / haven't a word
to say against it; but what | start
ed out to say is this: If a preacher
is judged by the size of his audi.
ence, then [ am some preacher
myself, for I am preaching once
a month to an audience Of over
so, 600 people. And I don't give
them just one little sermon and
quit, like the other preachers do,
but stay and preach six or eight
good sermons on every trip.
And then just think of the
price! Your preacher thinks you
are mighty stingy and close-fsted
if you don't grease his pocket to
the tune of ten or fifteen dollars
a year, and he will not get mad if
you double or treble the amount.
But | give you more preaching
and better preaching than he does
for only Is cents a year; and if
you'll hitch up the wagon and
bring several of your .neighbors to
meeting with you, you can all get
your years preaching for fifteen
cents apiece.
Now, can you beat that for a
bargain? I think not. There has
never been so much good preach
ing offered so cheap before, and
/ II you ever expect to get the
cuckleburrs of sin curried out of
your name, now is the time. The
q currycomb of truth which | use
will remove the burrs and also
loosen up the bark on: you old
hidebound sinners. It may hurt
4 considerably, and you may have
to squirm and twist like five hun
dred, but it will be good for you.
Delay is dangerous, so don't put
it off, but buy your ticket to-day
for year. S admittance into ''The
F'ool-Killer'' church and tell al
your neighbors to do likewise.
Help me to get the biggest con.
; gregation Of any preacher that
has ever opened his mouth be.
tween the two oceans.