Perth Amboy evening news., 1912-11-11
MABEIS ChITCAAl
.Hrs. Petticoat Sees Domestic
Side of Battleship Life.
UNCLE SANS HOUSEKEEPING.

F1ts wires Birthdsys
Dear Elsa-I was so sorry you could
not come to New York when the hee'
was here, for the sight was well worth
Seeing. Over a hundred of our battle
ships, srmorad cruisers and torpedo
boats lined up for miles along the Hud-
son river, and at night, when the ship"
were brilliantly lighted, the effect was
gorgeous. Dick knew a number of the
officers on board the ships. so we were
royalty entertained during their stay
In these waters. | had lots of fun go
ing over one 81 the ships with a yonng
everything would not be In perfect
order that he reminded me of a HNry
new young houseketper receiving hel
husbands relatives for the first time.
You go down a fight Of stairs. Every
thing is up and down on a ship, just
like your grandmother's old house in
the country, where no two rooms are
ON the same level.
Here's the mess ROOM" said my eS-
cort.
"But where are the tables and
chairs?" l inquired. looking meanwhile
into corners for piled up heaps of fur
niture.
up on the COILS replied Mr.. Ensign,
And. sure enough, there were the tables
ON racks against the ceiling, but not
a chair in sight.
"Where are the chairsT" 1 persisted,
and the encyclopedia guide explained
that the seats were all fastened to the
ceiling. They are long benches which
fold up like those for the tables.
Just think of getting your furniture all
out of the way during housecleaning
time or when you want to give a dance!
And no sharp corners to bump into
when you come home In the dark!
Up another flight of stairs. across a
sort of bridge effect and down again,
and l found myself In the ships sew
Ing room-a mans sewing room.
There sat three seamen, their legs
~thrashing up and down like mad,
stitching away for dear life. "They
are the ships seamstresses, the tai
lors.' explained my escort.
as there an attachment for darnins
socks. or do you do them by handY" l
saucily inquired.
A smile of plying liberation appear
ed on the countenanee Of Mr.. Ensign,
who replied with a significant flourish
Of his hand In the direction Of the Hud-
son:
sour method Of repairing socks is
far superior to the old fashioned way
Of darnlng. We require neither ma
chine. thread nor needle. We throw
'em overheard"
would you care to see my quar-
ters?" politely inquired my guide after
we had inspected the kitchen regions
and found them immaculate and up to
date initheir appointments.
The ensign, sliding the mingled
pride and anxiety which always beset
young housekeepers. led the way to
his apartment with a nonchalant air.
After giving a hasty glance around the
room as l peered into 1t and, while
preserving an unconcerned face. ]
caught him giving a surreptitious back
ward kick to an lnquisitive slipper IN
der his bunk and swiftly jsmming a
socially inclined handkerchief back
into the dra wer Of q chest.
81 didn't know until yesterday" cor
fessed Mr.. Ensign earnestly. that /
was a confirmed old bachelor" Il
scarcely think he looks his advanced
age Of twenty-three.)
Il had asked ONE girls over for tea.
and | told the boy to clean up my
quarters. Well. do you know. I went
down there after lunch. and such a
place! 1t took another fellow and mi
q whole hour working frant1cally just
to straightes up-not to clean up at
ADJUST to smooth things over" My
word, but the boy was funny!
The ward would have come
next In order for inspection. but time
was up-visiting hours were over-so
there was q chance only for ono peep
into the quarter which seemed to be q
thoroughly masculine place, its walls
lined with pictures. She was there in
full force and variety. q la Gibson, a
Ia Harrison Fisher and a Ia nobody in
particular
But don't you think. Elsa. dear, that
In this world the significance of little
things is often overlooked? Women,
though, don't lose sight Of them as
much as men do. The housewife. for
instance. who wants to make her home
attractive spends time and thought
upon the smallest details and sees to
It that the inside A. well as the out
side Of her glass lamp globes Is dust
cd and that her rugs are even and
straight. She knows that a good din
ner Is one that Is good throughout and
that cold gravy Or stale bread will
take the touch of completeness away
from an otherwise charming meal.
Nothing Is too small to be Of some
importance. and the man who forgets
bis wife's birthday or does not ssoop
to pick up her handkerchief when she
drops II Is pulling out one by n the
tiny pegs which hold together the grea'
structure Of their happiness.
My, what a lot Of cheap philosophy
I am getting out of my system! But
the weather has been SO "beastly.
you know" for the last few days
that I'm feeling down on my luck. 90
write soon and cheer up your dolefdl