davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
MILES AS A HuMoRlsr.

The claim of Chairman Hilles, of the republican national committee, that President Taft will carry S4 states with an aggregate electoral vote of 3s4, while Woodrow Wilson will carry ten states with an electoral vote Of 1l4, and Roosevelt will carry no state and receive no electoral vote, is one of the most absurd statements ever given out by man occupying the position of national chairman of a party. It shows the present state of mind of MT. Hilles. a -u
 It is evident from his statement that MT. HilIes comedies that the cam paign he is to carry on is a joke. If he did not consider it a joke he would not. at the present time try to be come facetious. MT. Hilles knows and every person who has read the papers and magazines of the country knows that MT Taft will carry but few states and those he does carry will have but few electoral votes. Rhode Island and Vermont are the only states con oeded to Taft by any political writer except those employed on partisan papers or by the Taft campaign com mittee. He will have a fight for any other state.
 Mir. Hilles evidently believes that he will tighten up the gloom about the Taft he'd quarters by making claims so great that they are ridiculous, thus causing a laugh. He thinks it is better to laugh than to nope, and he is right. He could be still funnier if he would claim Texas for Taft. It has always caused a smHe to speak Of Texas as going republican" After the uproar has subsided from that mirth proyoker. he can the issue an. other statement informing the world that Mir. Taft will carry Georgia by at least 25,OOO majority. This will be a side-splitter and Mir Hilles will get reputation as a humorist that may rival that of Mark Twain. Bill Nye- and probably far more likely-Bron MunChausen.
 As a really great piece Of humor. as a finishing touch, Mir Hilles should invite Henry Watterson. Gov. Varda. man and Senator Tillman to serve on the republican national committee.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
: : . z . . . 6
EDITORIAL COMMENT,
APOLOGY TO LITTLE
 AND DR. SHINE
CBlade Tribuue)

CBIade Tribuue)
 pr. F. E. Shine, of Bisbee Is out in an interview, explanatory Of the course of himself and Judge P. C. Lit tie, of Globe, iE which he says:
 The attitude of myself and Judge ?. C. Little, of Globe, in the Baltimore convention, has been misunderstood by great many people, in fact mum. erous reports have been circulated over Arizona regarding our votes that were absolutely untrue. was elected d delegate to Baltimore. instructed to vote for Champ Clark, which I did am southerner, and for that reason my sympsthies were for oscar Under wood, although l never cast a ballot TOT hlm during the convention. cbeyed my instrlctnons and voted for Champ Clark for the first thirty bal iotsr and would have been voting for hlm vel, had l not received telegrams rom the members of the Cochise county democratic committee and dozens of the leading democrats Of my county, informing me that there would be no objection at home if I voted Tor Wilson in the event that it became certain that Clark could not wln. Believing that Clark's cause was lost, l voted for Wilson the first time on the thirty-first ballot but not be- fore. Judge Little. of Globe, has also been the victim of false statements. Like myself, he went to Baltimore in structed for Clark and with Clark he remained until the very last ballot of the convention, when with all the other Arizona delegates he voted to make Governor Wilson's nomination | unanimous. It has been reported that Judge Little deserted Clark early in { the fight. but this s absolutely untrue. ] About the time l voted for Wilson, | Judge Little also voted for him once, but on the next ballot came back to i Clark and remained with the Mis- i souriah until the very last vote was | taken in the convention"
 | It affords us great pleasure to print Dr. shines statement, for Ike other | ardent friends of Champ Clark, in this state, we had been misled by the false reports 10 which he refers, and criticised both gentlemen for vio-
 lating their instructions. We had the utmost confidence in the integrity and democracy of both Dr. Shine and Judge Little. and did all we could to
 make the election of the latter in this district unanimous. therefore when the reports came charging that both had ignored their instructions fl
 was natural that we in common with
 others who believe that party instruc
 tons are as morally binding aa any
 other obligation, should feel resentful We extend both gentlemen an apology
 and assure them of our continued lrespect and esteem
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

q suppose municipal markets are all right to a certain extent" sighed the grocer's wife. :'but if everything is going to be municipal markets, where do we small tradespeople make our living?
 Tt is all very well to say that something must be done to bring down the high cost of living. l agree with that. But does it strike anybody that the high cost of living hits the small tradesman just as hard as it does his customers?
 People have to make a Twins That's all most of us grocers are doing A lot of our customers come ln their automobiles, too. Well, I cant Sf ford to have an automobile, and ! ter you it's a pinch to dress the children the way they ought to look and not give people an idea that we're about ready to fail in business.
 Suppose we had all municipal markets Wouldn't it put a lot of hon est people out of the way of making living? Of course the municipal stores could sell cheaper than small grocer. They could get things at their own prices and they wouldn't have to knuckle down to a lot Of rules the different companies make-the ones we have to buy from.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
THINGS TO TALK ABOUT

There is many a singer in concert who would make a bigger personal bit if she would appear exclusively cs yelI-mistress of a Vassar football crowd.
 It takes the English long time 10 see a joke, and yet they see a good many Americans newly rich so- ciety people.
 A man with red hair, a wooden leg and a hareliP is never muc1 of a success as a fugitive from justice. Even the detectives are apt 10 recog- nize him An average of seven oil stoves that won't smell are invented in this country every day.
 Talking machine discs can be used as pie plates. This is about the most satisfactory use to which they can be put.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
AW0MANyO OBSERVATIONS


Tt would be real nice for the people to buy their meats and groceries and things cheaper, l know. But look a all the people that would be put ou making a liying-the storekeepers an
 their clerks and delivery boys and such. The municipal stores wouldn have jobs enough to go around aud when you haven't got job or some way of earning money, even low prices don't help much
 Maybe some of the stores charge too much, but it isn't the small stores that are making a lot of money-un- less it's the man who has a chain or small stores in a city. That's setting to be quite the thing It isn't fair to the single store keeper. thougE, be cause he cant buy in big enough quan titles to get price reductions, and the other fellow can undersen him unti he is driven out Of the neighberhood. Then up go the prices again.
 Tt seems to me city could do better than having municipal stores, by forbidding one man to run chain of stores, or big concern opening re- tail stores everywhere.
 Let me tell you how my husband works to earn his living. He's up at o'clock every morning and at the store at 6. Saturdays he is up at { so he can get to the store at o'clock
 He generally doesn't get away from the store at all on Saturday and 1 send my little boy over with q lunch and some hot coffee in a TheTmos bot tie. l never know when he will ee home Saturday night. It's usually afte Ordinary week days he's home at : or later-generally later.
 ''YC,I see, don't get much company out of my husband. Besides that, he's worried and tired to death most o the time when he is home.
 Why, our little boy hardly knows his father. The lads in bed when i my husband leaves in the morning. and 1 again when he gets home at night i Two years ago, when John had appen | dicitis and was laid up for a month, he said he was glad of 1t because it gave him chance to see what nice family he had,'
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
HOT WEATHER IDEAS

One should always Leware oT fall ing iCicles when waking along a business street where the buildings are high. Some of them are heavy and fall with terrific force sufficient in fact, to smash a derby hat.
 So far as il is known there Is no form of life in the vicinity of the south pole. the temperature there be- ing much lower than st the north pole.
 In any sections of Siberia the ns- tives construct their houses on blocks of ice which afford good protection from the biting winds and the very low temperature outside.
 Many persons have lost their lives in snow slides on the mountains of Alaska.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
THAT VACATION

Unto tine mountains l would hie. And have a swell time, wife and |, At some hotel resort up nigh
 The summit. I'd have the finest time you know, There's just one reason ] don't go, 1 cant accumulate the dough
 Col dunn it. I've often planned a gay career Of life at Narragansett Pier, I've thought that almost every year
 Would bring it. It seems that it would be a slice Of purest joy right off the ice, But l have never had the price
 Col ding it. This year swore that l would go To Coney for day, you know, And take a dollar bill or so,
 And burn 1t. But I've quit dopin' it that way. There's nothin' doin' but to stay And hustle for my weekly pay
 Col dur nit.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
THIS DATE IN HISTORY"

August 20. i672-Massacre of the Brothers De Witt at The Hague l745-Francis Ashbury. the first Methodist bishop in America. born in England Died in Rich ord. Va, March Sl, 1916. 1794-Gen. Anthony Wayne defeated the Indians near Maumee Rap ids, in ohio. 1S29-Adrianople taken by the Rus sians
 1s33-Benjamin Harrison twenty third President Of the U. S.. born in North Bend. o. Died in Indianapolis. March 13. 190r 1S47-American- army routed the forces of Santa Anna at Cheru- busco. strongly fOrtifed place near the city of Mexico. 1S65-Final proclamation of the ces- sation of hostilities in the civll war
 l90S-United States battleship fleet welcomed at Sydney. N. s. W.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
THE REASON

love to board the trolley car And ride, it matters not how lar, Upon a fine and breezy seat l can defy the sultry heat. I like the happy pickup crowd. The warning bells that clang so loud, And when along the rails we zip IL makes a fine and dandy trip. l don't believe that would care To do my riding in the air Like Beachey does or OTyille Wright like to know where I will light. l don't call autoing much. fun; I almost never ride in one. And carriage riding pals on me. It's tame so far as l can see, Somehow or other l don't like To go out riding on a bike And motor boating to my mind Is riding of a tedious kind Of course maybe some folks will think That my idea is on the blink, But 1 will tell the reason why The street car ride I'm swearing by, A simple hint will quite suffice,
 1t is a matter of the price. The trolley way is, woe betide, The only way that l CAN ride.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
pIspleased the Widow.

A Philadelphia travelling man. hay. ing gone upon that journey for which there Is no return ticket, his many friends of the road consulted together as 10 the remembrance to be sent by them. and finally decided upon a de sign which was no. only original. but which they considered peculiarly ap- propriate. They never could under stand why the widow would not re ceive the beautiful suit case. made of white flowers. with the words. His last trip in purple vIoIets. on one side.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

a pennant aspirant. declares they will But Johnson and Lynch have been at the head of the game too long. It's time a reform party was started in the leagues.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
RAus MT FEM

Porch party conversation. Anti-fat cures. Collecting agencies. Summer political campaigners. Liquid butter Folks who own summer cottages. Gowns that button up the back. Hammocls that hang OF the bias. Snapshot fiends. Outing flannel nighties. Vacations (after you've had 'em) Starched collars. Tar walks.
 Reformers.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

Unless the people who are baseball fans. and almost every person in the
 United States belongs to that class, interfere. league baseball is likely to be injured by men who are trying to make money rapidly from the game. It is given out that a plan has been made and a corporation formed to tour the world with the New York team. providing that team wins the worlds pennaut. That sounds all right but when it is known that sev' eraI men belonging to other teams in the National league are financially interested in the corporation the mat
 ter takes on a diHerent aspect It i' Hain that it will be to the interest oi men holding stock in the enterprise to have the Giants win. Are these men so deeply interested in the sue cess of the Giants that they will 'ry to lose games to The Giants? Chicago
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
oIdest cI.y b the WerId.

Doctor Hsrkov. Russian savsnt. orce affirmed that sarara. on the right bank of the Tigrus. near Bag dad. Is the oldest city extant. Relies now discovered show that samara fiourished before the arrival of the semites in Chaldea or alesopotar !. 5000 B. c.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

Reports from the coast of Maine say the catch of sardines has been very small. The reported catch of suckers in New York seems to be nor. nal.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

President Taft has finally accepted Judge Hanford's resignation. How he happened to let it get through without vetoiug it isn't explained in the dis patches
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
R OW.THE .SPVRaa9 9 k9 OF.THE;MOMENT
 ASs by Roy k. .Moulton. 6)

hat
 Stopping runaway horse and having your name spelled wrong in the newspaper notice.
 The morning mail on the first day of the month.
 Digging up your old dress suit on ly to find that the moths have eaten one tail off the coat. The only thing 10 do is to wait until they eat the other tail off and then you will have a Tuxedo
 Living next door to an amateur clariOnetest
 Trying to find the beautiful seen cry so yividly pictured in the rail road vacation folders.
 Discovering that you have got to buy a longer belt.
 Taxing a family of nine children on q picnic.
 Seeing a man who owes you S9 rid ing by in an automobile.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
streteb of wa.er Well Naned.

So many ships have been lost in the strait between the Red Sea and the Arabian bulf th@t the strait is called the Gate of Tears.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

There is one thing in favor Of a deaf and dumb department at the state university; the mutes can't have a college yell.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

4 Boston man, who couldn't pull himself out Of trouble, committed sui. eide with a corkscrew.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

The New York police department having looked about for something to do in order to snow that it believes in law and order. has started war against Sunday baseball games,
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
NO, NOT ONE

Breathes there man with soul so
 dead
 Who never to his friend hath said i; "Ill bring my car some eventide, And take you for a nice long rider"
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20
WHAT MAKEs PEssIrAIsTs

Sitting three hours on a five inch board at circus behind a picture
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

Since the big canal has been com. pleted at Yuma and the water Is run ming through it, the people Of that town have decided that the canal makes fine swimming hole and they have formed a bathing club. It is all the fashion to put on an old suit of clothes or an old skirt and go in bathing" In a short time all the folks will be wearing bathing suits and the only sign seen on the streets of Yuma hot afternoons will be the sign Of the first two fingers on the right hand raised above the others while the arm is extending high above the head. Every man who lived as lie should when a boy knows what that sign means.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

In New York in July the murders amounted to 30, accidents 25O. Of the vehicles automobiles were the chief aggressors. killing 2L, and seriously injuring I6S. or the murders the rec ords do not show how many eere charged to the police.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

The confession ol Faith" of Roose- welt is a skillful appeal to the farmers, wage csrrers and even business men for their support. It even gives com fort to those corporations that are resisting the antitrust laws. Whether or not it contains the views of tho rank and file of the party remains to be seen. They are but an insignifi, cant part of the party and know that they are simply to obey orders not to express opinions. The colonel is the whole thing-the party.
Bisbee daily review., 1912-08-20

It has been decided that one battle ship is enough to build this year That's a good decision. About the strongest lobby at Washington in that working for expenditures for ships for the navy, which shows that somebody has the money to spend
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
HOTELS

MOTEL, LUXOR, 54 MAIN ST, OP-
nosite Empress theater. Under now
r,spnarement; entirely refnrnlshed. Rooms
ningla or ensuite. Rooms with baths.
stte,e tr baths Rates 15c up: weekly
rntos 81 so up. II, T. snyder. Prop.
rates F'''' d20o1
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
BETTILYoN HOME BUILDERS co.
RUNGALOw-sNAP-s2s5o.

BUNGALOW-SNAP
Beautiful broom, new, modern bunga-
low on University bench. Fruit, shade.
garden, walks and coops $500 cash, bal
ance easy Will take clear lots as first
payment,
CLOSE IN. ON 4TH EAST,
Groom modern brick. Good renting
property. Only $1,000. VIII trade for
ranch.
TERRACE SITE
Between ith and 5th East, in nice
court. s700. WIN trade in as first pay
ment on 5-room house.
COUNTRY HOME.
acres choice land. 4-room house. i
block from State st. in small orchard,
for or S-rooin house. Southeast.
AN IDEAL HOME.
Cold type cannot do Justice to this new
bungalow. large rooms, hardwood
floors. mission fuish fireplace. bookcase,
buffet kitchen, screened porch. concrete
basement, furnace. a complete home
nice lot, fine southeast location, Price
$4,000, on terms.
JUST A WORD ABOUT FIRE.
Is your property insured? We repre-,
sent a reliable, quick settlement, board
company the Commercial Union.
BETTILYON HOME BUILDERS CO.
1912 East 3rd So. st. Wasatch 2O3o
dl949
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
YOUR GAIN. OWNERS LOSS.

Beautiful 7-room. strictly modern bun
galow. finest of up date plumbing Ak
tures; elegant electrical fixtures; large
basement; on corner lot. 50x157 feet to
alley; property well worth $4,000 slashed
mortgage on 1t for $500 for four years !:
$500 can be paid at 500 per month with
out interest. This is the best PROPOSE
Gated on 18th East near l1th South To
see this bargain means to buy IL. Call
us up for further particulars.
MEEkS & MCCARTNEY.
POLL Boston Bldg. Wasatch 26o2
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
FOR SELE-REAL ESTATE
REAL EsTATE-IMPRovED
HALLoRAN-JUDGE LOAN & TRUST
COMPANY.
WHY PAY RENT


When YOU can move into a modern and
up-to-date home b. paying $3.50 and the
paIance In rent at s25 per month includ-
ing interest at per cent per annum? ?
This horne contains rooms and Is real
bargain at $4,000. The rooms are large.
good barn. Lot 5oxl32 feet to alley. all
In lawn. There are d number OF beauti-
ful trees. The place Is cheap at $4,000.
oys.o we VII loan loan $500 on IT. Call at the
and take you to see It. Seeing means
buying. Price, $4,000. $3.50 cash.
On University Bench near the Uni
verslty and High School we will sell you
modern home for s3500, with $500 cash;
built years. OF red pressed brick. white
This home contains rooms and recep-
tion hall, has stairway in and can finish
two or three other rooms. In the din
ing room there Is large bay window;
ment basement under the entire house.
Lot iCx132 feet to alley, All special taxes
paid. Ask yourself the question, why
you should pay rent when you can have
$500 cash and the balance at $50 per
month, including interest at Z per cent
| Price $500,
Another bargain in 6-room bungalow
| on the east bench. strictly modern. Don't
| ask the price. before seeing IT. We are
offering this home below cost. and aftel
seeing II we will prove it to you. j
| contains rooms and reception hall
| sleeping porch. hardwood floors. beauti-
! full light fixtures. fire brick CRATE. bay
window in dining room, full cement base
rnent. gas heater for water In SUNNI er
and In winter furnace heats the water
| II you have $500 cash we will arrange
| terms for you,
Think Of an s-room modern pressed
| brick home on East South Temple beInl
sold for $4,000 on terms! II sounds un
reasonable. but II is true. The lot ant
for $500. and the same house toda!
| would cost $500, II you need a hous
this large. don't fail to see this one. Al
taxes paid.
Have YOU 5000 in real money and ar
still paying rent II so. stop payin,
rent and buy this fourroom modern
brick. bungalow It's dandy. 4 larg
rooms and reception hall. and is thor
oughly modern except furnace, Has
fine cement basement, large lot. nea
sold for s23oo This week, and 5000 VII
give you possession.
WE HAVE BARGAINS IN BUSINESS
AND RESIDENCE PROPERTY.
WILL BUILD YOU A HOME or
MONTHLY PAYMENTS,
WE LOAN MONEY ON REAL ESTATE
AGENTS FOR THE ROYAL. "TH1
WORLDS GREATEST FIRE IN
SURANCE CO"
WE WILL WRITE YOUR BOND.
81 PER CENT MORTGAGE LOANS O,
! HAND FOR INVESTORS
WE ACT IN THE CAPACITY Ol
AGENT IN ANY BUSINESS
| AFFAIRS.
, FIALLORAN-JUDGE LOAN & TRUS'
, COMPANY.
3o9-11 MAIN so. PHONE Elk. 1s'
d2oI
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
FOR SALE-REAL ESTATE
REAL EsTATE-IMPRovED.
UOMESITE ADDITION
lIOMESITE ADDITION
HoMESITE ADDITION

This beautiful addition is rapidly being
built UP with nice pressed brick cottages
and bungalows, by industrious men and
women who are determined to have a
standing in the community by owning
their own home. Contracts have been let
for three more nice homes and work on
same will start this week.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17

5-RooM NEW RED PRESSED BRICK
toilet. beveled plate glass windows, buffet
kitchen. walks. cement steps, large porch
etc.. lot 379x125 feet. This home Is To-
Gated on Emerson ave, and close TO car
line. and can be bought for S24Io; terms
$500 cash; bal SIS per month.
EDGAR r. LARSON REALTY CO,
o0l-2 Hooper Bldg.
Wasa tch 1858.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
HOW AROUT YOU?

Do YOU want a home? Do you want to
make some money without laboring for
III Can you spare few dollars per
month? II so, buy some lots In Horneslte
Addition at once Remember this that
during June Sc cash and $3.50 per month
will get you a fine lot.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
INSIDE OF TWO YEARS

This beautiful addition will be covered
with nice new homes and lots that are
selling now for 5000 Will be worth 5000 to
$500 improvements make values. and the
purchasers OF these lots are homeseekers,
no 0nncIilaInre
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17
FOR SALE
MISCELLANEOUS

b6SI BUTTER. 25c LIB. FRESH EGGS.
20c dog; 2 largo cans milk peas or
corn, Csc: pot roast beef. 15c H., table
peaches. 15c can. or Si.6o doz. Our store
Is full OF such bargains Evans Brown
60 Phone w. 2471. 1T3 w. So. Temple.
d15n6
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17

BIG BARGAINS IN HOTELS AND
rooming houses from 10 30 rooms.
See !. w. Dollar. l53 South Main. dcloS
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1912-06-17

LIGHT BRAHMAS. HOUDANS, WHITE
Wyandottes. CochIns, Plymouth Rocks.
lcghorns, r. I. reds. white Pekin. Indian
runner, and Rouen ducks louiouse
geese, also houses for sale cheap: par
ties leaving town. 1926 So. 7th East
1881