The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1912-07-09
Polly Tells Petunia She Thinks
Foe Married The Wrong Man
Pink Checked and Golden Haired She Sulks Because Adam
Who Was Entirely Devoid of Temperament Sat Off and
Counted the Animals-'Twas Ever Thus-The Woman
of the Bible Were All So Human
BY DOLLY DALRYMPLE

that way" Polly said sympathetically.
Eve was his inevitable victim"
Poor woman sighed Petunia, "she
must have formed an awful idea of the
masculine sex, taking Adam as an ex-
ample. Why. he was as stupid as a pug
dog, and Eve was as clever as the
cleverest suffragette of today"
II wonder what they found to talk
about, anyway" Polly speculatively pom
dered. Il amaglne Adam was the kind
of person one 'eonversed' with. You
know there are some folks you never get
TALK to them. OF course, Adam and
Eve had to make some sort OF conversa-
ton at the table to keep the servants
from suspecting they were unhappily
married"
II just love that book, Listeners
Lore / believe it is, that e. V. Lucas
wrote" Petunia commenced, IN which
he says women are so confoundedly dis
appointing, anyway. They WILL marry
the wrong man; in fact. they do it quite
as often as men marry the wrong
woman"
Il never thought before of that being
the explanation of Adam and Ewes trou-
ble," Polly said.
Simplest thing in the world" Petunia
replied i've ALWAYS known that Eve
married the wrong man. Adam wasn't
intended for her"
"She was created for him." Polly de-
cIared
but she educated herself away from
him. Petunia defended.
"Well. anyway, it was dead stupid -
Polly confessed, "for Adam was an aw-
fully embarrassing man. Why, he didn't
even have a PAST for Eve TO speculate
upon 4nd bride him with kisses to tell
her about while she was dead sure that
he was the ONLY man Eve had ever
looked at"
Adam knew from the very start that
he was IT." Petunia said. Eve coudn't
even worry him by telling him about men
she'd been engaged to. and make him
Jealous. by calling him George or Jack
or Dick by mistake. Why. she couldn't
even tell him about how many debutante
bouquets she got. She just grew up right
under his eye. Terribly mushroom-y sort
of fellow"
And when she'd kiss him on the bald
spot of his pate" Polly declared, land
coddle him and coax him into promising
her that II she died he'd never wear any
other woman's picture in the back of his
watch why he just laughed in his fig
leaf sleeve and-and--''
THAT was the psychological moment
Witll lie SObDitu the apple, 1tlullid Ob-
served" and the next thing he did was
to blab the whole thing, which made him
the first tattle-tale the world ever knew. :"
THE man who kisses and tells" Pc
tunia quoted.
Guess Eve got even with him when she
left the Garden for trying to start a scan
dal on her." Polly said quickly.
Guess she was willing, though, for
A dam fell awning ha tn N
so she could get away Petunia re-
marked, "for 1t must have been awful
starting life on a truck farm that way,
and I'll bet she would have liked long
before that to have packed her fig leaf
finery and skipped by the light o. the
moon without so much as one backward
glance at Eden. She'd have done II even
if she'd thought she would have had to
support Adam by taking boarders."
Certainly" said Petunia. you know
she would have gotten more pleasure out
OF one years freedom, coaxing little
old red Geranium in a bent tomato can
to grow. than she would have gotten in
centuries living amidst that magnificent
display of Coleus and Hybsicus and Vir-
ginia Creeper that spelled PARA
Disc In the Garden. 1t is doing some
thing yourself that crowds out heart
hunger. That's what made Eve dissatis-
fed, she had nothing TO do. Busy wom-
en- never suffer from hear Hunger and
lack of Soul Culture. and all that sort of
thing"
1.-THE heart hungry are never the women
who are making true homes or rushing
out into the world to make an honest
living" Polly agreed
what love best about the women OF
the Bible Petunia said thoughtfully.
lis that they are so intensely human.
I dearly love Eve She seems like near
and dear relative. instead of the distant
relation that she is-the Universal Mother
of us all. There's somebody else love.
too. That's Lots wife, Talking about
human people, wasn't she the REAL
thing? I'm going to tell you some of
these days what ] think about her and
how I adore her.