davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Real Utopia at Capitals Front Door

get on Columbia line car marked
District line," and ask the conductor
to let you of at Sixty-drst street
northeast. Then follow your nose, ac-
cording to the directions. r
The first thing you know you are
right in the heart of Utopia, town hall
and all. It Is Capitol Heights. Md.
By all rights it should be part Of the
District, for It is populated by Wash
ingtonians, and its citizens for the
most part have their business In this
city.
They have real chickens in Cap
itol Heights, hens that lay eggs, and
roosters that crow like all get out 1T
daybreak every morning.
The. social life Of the community
centers about the town hall, where
dances. plays and fairs are frequently
given. The town boasts a Ladies' I'm
provement League, whose duty it is
to see that the lights are lighted ev-
cry night so that their husbands can
find the way home, and citizens a.
ISOLATION which accompanies progress
sive legislation. On moonlight nights
the Ladies' Improvement association
realizes a big saving In coal oil, be-
cause hubby finds his way to his own
doorstep in the light Of the moon.
There is also an athletic club. with
well-ftte quarters.
It Is a shame to think that the pro-
gressive little town will be before long
swallowed up by the spreading city.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

uYASH1NGTON.-1t has been claimed
W that one can find about anything
desired in Washington, from armada
los to zithers, but what resident of
this fair city ever suspected that there
Is. almost in its very midst, a peace
full farming community, the residents
Of which have perfectly fresh eggs for
breakfast every day in the week with
never a care whether the market price
Is 80 cents q dozen or not?
And who ever thought, that within
the shadow of the dome Of the capitol,
there is community Of 1000 souls, to
which even the omnipresent moving
picture theater has never percolated1
Who would believe that In q locality
not far removed from Washington, and
peopled by Washingtonians, the ro-
mantle straw ride still exists, and the
historic town hall Is the center Of so
ctal activity? And that the quilting
bee Is still an accepted method Of
passing the long winter evenings?
Where is the Utopia, where taffy pulls
and lantern parties are still an accept
ed means Of entertainment, is asked.
Well. it's easy to get there. Just
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Try to Sing in Senate, Hustled Out

A SENSATIONAL campaign demon
n stration was narrowly averted In
the senate the other day. Sergeant
alarms Ransdell received warning IN
time to prevent a quartet Of robust
voices from bursting into song in one
Of the public galleries.
The press agent of music publish
ing house conceived the idea that It
would be great advertising to have
the story telegraphed into every ham
let that the august senators had listen
ed attentively to q campaign song and
then applauded it, resumfng their pro-
ceedings where the tuneful voices OF
his quartet had interrupted them. He
experienced no difficulty in gaining ad-
mission with his quartet to one of the
galleries. When the leader took from
his pocket a tuning fork and sounded
it for the key and the singers in sup
pressed tones hummed preparatory
to bursting into song, senate attache
warned the sergeantat-arms that an
attack was about to be made on the
dignity of the senate.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Boy Five Years Old is Heavy Weight

Y ANsAs CITY, Mo.-"Bill Coulter,
n aged five years, weight 10
pounds, was at the Union depot here
on his way from his home at Spring
dale, Ark, to St. Joseph, Mo-, to en-
ter hospital Bill was accompanied
by his father, R. R. Coulter, farmer
in Arkansas. The boy is troubled
with softening of the bones, and his
legs have bent under his weight to
such an extent that he can hardly
walk.
How do you feel this morning,
Bill?" his father asked him.
Pop, 1 feel big enough to whip &
man." he answered. And "Bill''
doubled up his fist in white hope"
style.
How much did Bill weigh when he
was born?" was the question put to
the father.
only nine pounds" he said, "and
he didn't grow much until he was six
months old. Then, when he was lit
tie over a year old he weighed 81
pounds; when he was two and a half
he weighed 81. In the last three years
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

LEVELAND, O.-The 10 cents a
~ hundred that the city pays for
dead flies enabled Harry Carmine, a
Chicago timer, to pay for bed in a
flop house" the other night, instead
of sleeping in a box car, as he had
done the night before.
Carmine called at the municipal fly
bureau at the city hall shortly before
1t closed and inquired If it were true
that the city paid 10 cents a hundred
for dead flies. Being assured that
was the truth, he departed and re-
turned In a short time.
This isn't any kid, Is it," he in
quired.
I'VE pay 10 cents hundred for the
bodies of flies," Miss Florence Due
ringer, in charge Of the bureau, re-
piled.
We'll, here Is bunch then" said
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Sarsfield Aboo Heard Call of Wild

car tracks ahead Of In automobile
proceeding from east to west.
The automobile struck the rear
right wheel of the cab and swung II
about so violently that Ford was
Jared from his seat and tell sprawl
ing to the street. With a loud honk
of the horn the automobile sped west
and Sarsfield Aboo, elevating his
head and tail, sped north.
Feeling the call Of the wild or
something, Sarsfield Aboo extended
himself with every Jump. By the time
he reached Ninth street he was NOV
ing like Ballyhoo Bey coming down
the stretch under whip and spur.
The Hayneses and the Joneses
opened both doors of the cab with
the idea of jumping out. But tho
ladies were afraid to Jump and the
men would not Jump ahead Of the
ladies, SO all four did the next best
thing and emitted Pennsylvania cries
Of alarm that we're heard for blocks.
With every yell from the cab Sars-
field Aboo put on more speed. Ap-
preaching Fourteenth street he was
in his best stride and the cab was
slipping to and fro over the pavement
like the lash Of a whip.
Delehanty and Harrington. giants in
stature and cool of mind, saw the
runaway coming. With businesslike
nonchalance they placed themselves
so Sarsfield Aboo and the trailing
cab would have to come between
them.
Delehapty grabbed the bride and
hung on. Harrington got the reins
and hung on. The cops fell and were
dragged across Fourteenth street
but the weight told on Sarsfield
Aboo and as he essayed to turn and
shake them of he got tangled up in
his own feet and fell.
After a time Ford, the cabman,
came limping along and rescued his
property. Upon his assurance that
Sarsf1eld Aboo was SO tired he would
not run away again If the Metropolis
tan tower fell down in front of his
face, the Slatington, Pa, quartet con-
tinued the trip to the Grand Central
station in the Ford cab.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

M EW YORK.-To the unspeakable
~ amazement of James Ford, vet
eran cab driver, his veteran horse,
Sarsfleld Aboo, nineteen years old,
ran away the other afternoon. The
amazement Of Ford was shared by his
fares, Mr.. and Mrs. William: Haynes
and Mr.. and Mrs. F. G. Jones Of
Slatington, Pa, who had engaged
Ford and his rig at the Liberty street
ferry because Of the demure appear
ance and deliberate gait Of the afore-
said Sarsfield Aboo.
Incidental to the runaway the Wis
itors from slatington, Pa, were the
cynosure Of all eyes and the assail-
ants Of all ears along Fifth avenue
from Eighth street to Fourteenth
street. At the latter point Policemen
Delehanty and Harrington leaped upon
Sarsfleld Aboo and bore him to the
pavement to the utter destruction of
their new uniforms and the accumula-
ton of bruises, sprains and con-
tusions which gained them tho unso-
licited sick leave Of a department
surgeon.
James Ford was sitting on the box
of his weatherbeaten cab at the
Liberty street ferry when the Stating
ton visitors approached him and
evinced desire to be transferred to
the Grand Central station in time to
catch train for Wildwood, N. Y.
They specified in the contract that
they were to be driven up Fifth ave
nue. as far as the length Of that
thoroughfare served as a route to
their destination.
Observation-Disclosures" sounded the
ample hoofs of Sarsf1eld Aboo on the
wet and shiny pavements until Eighth
street and Fifth avenue was reached.
At that crossing Jehu Ford endeav.
ored to urge Sarsfield Aboo across the
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
SULTAN A MEDlATIZED RULER

On March 30, France inaugurated a
change in her political dealings with
Morocco. by the signing of a treaty
with the Sultan, Mulia-Abd-el-Haf1d
establishing a French protectorate.
France has had much experience in
the government of the North African
countries, which line the Mediterran.
can from Tripon to the Atlantic ocean.
and the decision to leave the govern.
ment nominally in native hands ia q
wise one. It is evidently based on the
success Of her peaceful conquest Of
Tunis where the externals of Arab
rule have been preserved. In Algeria,
on the other hand, where the admin
istratiDn IL directly and openly
French, her domination aroused the
bitter jealousy and hostility of the
natives who saw in the elimination of
their native rulers a threatened sub
version of the Mahommedan religion,
with the result that France has had
to maintain her footing by rigorous
military rule. Mulia Hafid, the pres.
OccO In known to his auhiacfs aa tho
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Capitol policemen and detectives
fastened to the gallery. A confederate
of the press agent, suspecting some
thing was about to happe3, gave his
associates a signal from a doorway
and the singers quickly withdrew from
the gallery. Employees Of the sergeant
alarms escorted the singers out Of the
capitol grounds. Il K
Carrie Nation attempted to address
the senate from one Of the galleries
several years ago, but since then
there has been no encroachment on
the rules of the senate, which pro-
hibit demonstrations Of any kind in
the galleries. Z
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

he has gained 43 pounds. Bill is a
heavyweight all -is..::, Amt you, Bill?"
You bet" "Bill'' said.
Bill" was born and reared in Grand
Junction, Colo. He has lived in
Arkansas for nine months. 1t took
him five months to get acclimated,
and in the time since he has gained
ten pounds-and is still growing.
"Bill's weight was so great that his
legs couldn't support him." his father
said, land We had to put braces on
him when he was three years old.
He wore them out and for the last
eight months he hasn't had any. That
is the reason his legs are bowel so
now. We are going to hospital to
have them straightened"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

around
wet miserable
teach man anything 1t must be profit
1T
SO I'm up here at John Weeks with Mrs Weeks daughter
I'VE missed the circus, but I'm happy N damp"
Il a lot Of
YES said refectvey
and congratulated
thing to
kindly"
How
II don't
cigar out for the first time and ponding
Wen
but I'm not throwing hat about
weep
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14


the list they eligible until tie
of the state miles the
of the and
EFFORT required
On side hiding places
learned
the cities the northwest
be
Out of the fifteen convict
half
report In night
would
confidence
thieves believe
before
The engaged in oprang quar1os
land
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

"He (the pedestrian) has a right to
presume that persons in charge OF
cars and ether vehicles will use or.
binary care to avoid injuring him and
govern his conduct accordingly
Recent Cour; Decision. He may have
the right. But what will that right
avail him In the next wor1d3
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
GOV. WEST TRUSTS CONvICTS

1.-THE only honor lacking in the aver
age criminal is that which Is wrenched
from him by incivility, distrust and
inhumanity. Extend to convict the
courtesy, confidence and trust due him
as a man and he will respond w>4h
more honor than the average person
who has never seen the bars, the dun
geon or the dismal gray walls Of a
pepitentiary."
Basing his action on this bit of
philosophy, Gov Oswald West of Ore
gon recently threw open the barred
doors Of the Oregon state penitentiary
and turned more than 200 convicts out
into the inviting forests and fields to
serve the remainder Of their terms
without guards, stripes, chains or
stockades.
With one sweep the dungeon, the
DIRK cell, the striped suits, the ball
and chain and the gallows were wiped
out as unnecessary parts of the insti-
tuition and in their stead was estab-
liyhed a unique and revolutionary
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Reuben B. Hale. the vice-president
Of the Panama-Pacific International
exposition, to be held in San Francisco
in 1915, celebrating the completion Of
the Panama Canal, was one of a spe.
cial commission appointed to make q
trip abroad to lay before ministers of
foreign affairs and army and navy
authorities, the details and scope Of
the enterprise. The commission sailed
on the Mauritania April oath. Mr..
Hale is a well-known merchant Of
San Francisco, who was the first per-
son to suggest the holding of an ex-
position to celebrate the completion of
the Panama Canal. The commission
consists Of Mr.. John Hays Hammond,
president; Mr.. Reuben B. Hale, vice.
president of the Panama-Pacif1c Inter-
national exposition; Brigadier-G General
Clarence B. Edwards, U. 8. A.; Mr..
William T. Sesnon, vice-president Of
the San Francisco chamber Of COM
merce; Mr.. Theodore Hardee, e1scu.
tive officer; Mr.. Charles. F. Wilson,
;. Emery, secretary. General Edwards
2 President Taft to represent the army
ed by the department Of state to Amer
d, and bear letters to the highest gc1.
nfrfoa viaitad e.. z.ss,:,5..-i. Ia -. -.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14


Solving the Yolkless Egg Problem. i
william C.. Christine, q carrier OF
one of the rural routes out Of Wash
ington, puts in his spare time raising
chickens, and he claims to have devel-
aoped a hen that lays yolkless eggs.
Christine says this hen has laid half
dozen eggs Of that variety. It II his
ambition to supply yp1kless eggs q
bakers and caterers for use 81 icing
cakes. (. 1850
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Have Used Spare Time Well.

00VS OBSO 0PoSS BsU0 VV"s
On the question Of how working
people, on the whole. have spent the
added hour or hours Of freedom from
work, an author says that where Gym
les prophesied more drunken idleness
and rowdyism, fairer observers found
a kind Of reseneration-no sudden
millennium, but wherever sufficient
time has elapsed an extraordinary ad-
vance IN physique and morals.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

After wireless telegraph operators
have been placed under government
regulation perhaps there will be room
for hope that something may be done
about palace car conductors and head
walters.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Boston Is to establish hospital for
the cure OF the blues" This shows
what uninterrupted devotion to Rob-
ert Browning will bring q community
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

An expert advises simplicity in cul-
tivating garden. After all, the SIM
plest words are best for relieving the
mind when the lettuce turns out to be
weeds.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

A Denver woman keeps her savings
in an icebox, presumably In the hope
that some day she'll have a cool mil.
lion.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

A New York lawyer says that in
America the crook runs less risk than
the honest workingman. The crook
usually gets full value for legal serv-
ices.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

There are reported to be fewer law.
yers in New York than formerly. Is
Manhattan making this announcement
in order to induce immigration?
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Telephone girls complain that the
headgear they are compelled to wear
produces corns on their ears. Still.
corn on the ear isn't so bad.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

California travelling men are to boy.
colt places where tipping is not pro-
hibited. They will have plenty OF
places to avoid in this mercenary day.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Many a young man has a bad half
tour in the forenoon explaining where
he was between $3.50 and the after
loon before.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

It takes a true scientist to wait,
when he sees mosquito biting him,
to discover before swatting whether
his enemy Is a germ carrier or not
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The average man is not alarmed BY
the statement that there are a million
and half microbes on a dollar bill.
He doesn't keep it long enough to in
cur danger.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

New York's death rate has been
halved since 1866. The people who
live there are becoming more hard
ened. !.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Still, the coinage Of half-cent coin
would give the typewriter girls the op
portunity to use their ~" key often
er.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

OF course there is much to be salo
In favor Of the recall of ump1res unoe1
certain mournful circumstances.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Knitting is used as a cure for bad
,erves by overweight women OF Ger
many. 1t seems like terribly utilt'
mrian form of therapy.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The edict has gone forth that wom-
ems dresses this year are to have
countless buttons This is where the
matrimony rate will take a big slump.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Boston is to have hospital for vic
Tins OF the "blues." Would it not b.
cheaper to buy them tickets so they
could get out of Boston?
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

About this time of year look out fo'
reports that your favorite ball team
Is composed exclusively Of cripples.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

poetess asks: "Oh, where does
beauty linger?" Answers from dealers
IN hair goods and cosmetics should
5e barred.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

In Kansas City the other day the
wife of a painless dentist horsewhip'
ped his office girl. The scene is re.
ported to have been painful
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The invention of a sock that Will
not wear out is another crushing blow
at the good old institution of mar
rage.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The fashions for women this veal
are but repetition Of those of 1885.
Clothes as well as history repeat them
selves.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

A frog leg famine is predicted. ou'
there are a number OF citizens "nc
are not in the least disturbed.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Eggs are only five cents dozen II
China. No wonder that acting there
is regarded as a degrading occupation
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The Germans now say bathing mul-
tiplies bacteria. 1t. however, reduces
smells, and the one offsets the other
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The Paris fashions call for corsets
tor men, but men refuse to DO re-
shaped in this way.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

A Norwegian claims that he has In
vented a boat that even boat rocker
cannot sink.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
UNCLE JOE, rs. Still YOUNG

Uncle Joe'' Cannon celebrated his
ssventy-sixth birthday at Washington
the other day under cloud Of grief.
The night before he exultantly an
aounced that he was going to observe
tho day by dissipating wildly. A cir
Gus was In town and he was going to
take the afternoon and, II necessary,
tue evening of and go to see the lions
aud tigers and the hippograffe and the
beautiful lady acrobats and the hair
raising trapezists.
Instead Of that he went meekly up
to the home on Congressman Weeks.
OF Massachusetts,, with his daughter
and spent the evening decorously
there.
Thought you were going to the cir
eus," q reporter said to him.
II was" said Uncle Joe. but it
ra1ned. And In the course of seventy
dve-1 mean seventy-six- years of
quiet and irreproachable life I have
found that whenever it rains and I go
tn a c1roNR I o1urovc cot
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

The reports of automobile accidents
are quite numerous for a season WHICH
has Just opened.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

A Boston doctor enumerates dozen
causes of spring fever. But he 1a1is
to mention carpet-beating.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

Automobiles possessed Of wild de-
sire to reduce the population snoulo
be suppressed.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14

10 known to his subjects the
thysxth neal
usurpaion of
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-06-14
Helping the farmer to help himself
the newest agricultural creed.
Rainy days bring out the man who
carries his umbrella as though it were
/ spear.

This seasons precipitation should
be conducive to successful alligator
farming.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1912-06-05
MERIT SYSTEM
TO BE INSTALLED
At POSFOFFICE

The merit or efficiency system win
be installed in ths chickasha postof-
flee next Monday morning. By this
system the clerks win be checked and
given points Of merit and demerlts for
their daily records in the office. An
exec. record of the work Of each clerk
win be kept and promotions made ac-
cording to this record.
Any error made in throwing the
mail for distribution will be registered
against the clerk who made the err
ror. Each man will have colored
pencil and viii check the mail he
throws. Errors win come back to the
general delivery and win be checked
70 The clerk whose color appears on
the mail parcel or letter.
The merit and efficiency system has
been in vogue in all Of the large Of
fices for several years. Miss Erma
Rose. clerk in the office. viii have
charge Of the records.