davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

-
Mayor Shank, Of Indianapolis, was con-
demning the extortions of a certain type
Of middlemsn.
This type of middieman," no said,
cant be beat, for whatever he gives
you with one hand he takes back with
the other. He is almost as bad as Cor
nelius Husk.
'oid Corn Husk.'' as the boys used
to call him, sold the t~avernkeeper ten
dozen eggs one day. There was just
one egg left over, and the tavernkeeper
asked Husk to throw 1t In. The old
man, however, demurred.
But finally he consented to throw in
the egg provided the tavernkeeper would
stand him a drink. This was agreed to,
the egg was handed over and then the
tavernkeeper said:
"'Now, old man, nominate our liquor.
sherry and egg said old Cornelius,
with a twinkle in his eye"
York, said Of the international school
question:
''The subject of the American versus
the English school has been too much
discussed. The good got from a school
depends, after all, on the schoolboy
chiefly, and I'm afraid the average school
boy is well reflected in that classic
schoolboy letter home which said:
Dear Parents: We are having a good
time now at school. George Jones broke
his leg coasting and is In bed. We went
skating I'M the ice broke and we all got
wet. Willie Brown was drowned. Most
of the boys here are down with in6u.
enza. The gardener fell into our cave
and broke his rib, but he can work a
little. The aviator man at the race
course kicked us because we threw sand
In his motor and we are all black and
blue. I broke ny front tooth playing
football. We are very happy"
The perennially blooming Lillian Rus
sell has always been a great believer In
fresh air as a tonic without a come
days In a very up-to-date touring car.
She Ia telling her friends Of a converse
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10


man rIveted her with a disappearing
look, and remarked very distinctly: my
dear young woman, I had hoped that
l had misunderstood your question. but.
since you persist, l must say that l
prefer the old-fashioned nightshirt. :
Alfred H. Lewis was somewhat sur
prised or going into a restaurant one
evening recently to be almost over
whelmed by the attention OF a man
whom he scarcely knew, but h in
sisted on introducing him as the great
est writer of the g to several others.
and on his sitting down to the table
with them the riddle read itself a few
moments later when the effusive per-
son handed across the table to the great
est writer OF the age a card on which
he had written, Dear old man, can you
let me have ten dollars?" Not to be
outdone in ~friendliness Of dictation,
Lewis wrote on the other side OF the
card, deal old man, I can't" and
handed It back.
Robert r. Davis, editor Of the Munsey
magazines, on one occasion went visiting
with o. Henry down on Long Island. ut
was a very hot day. said Davis. I'VE
had climbed an everlasting hill. Another
greater hill stretched before us. The sun
was a disc Of brass, and dust and heat
and clicking insects arose from the
ground. We sat on a fence to rest. Is
there anything else l can show your
I asked him. Yes said Henry, wiping
his forehead. Show me a return ticket
TO New York"
wan a situation as errand boy, do
you? Well, can you tell me how far the
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

must see if something can't be done for
you"
Hope beat strongly in the beggar's
breast and he murmured God bless
you with unusual fervor.
Two days later the sympathizer APP
peared again and o~stentatiously pre-
scented the cripple with the materializa-
ton Of his benevolent intentions. He
gav him a new crutch.
George AIDE, at a dinner in Chicago,
delivered an amusing address in grammar.
Don't" he sa~id-"don't say, Mamie
and me have been to church, when you
mean Mamie and I have been to church.
Why, though, lie about 1t at all?
Don't use the word got too much. 1t
Is inelegant. I have got a million is
not nearly so refined as i have a million.
From whom you got i~t-Leonidas Merritt
or John DIS. after all, pobody's affair
but your own"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

Madison. wis, citizens have petitioned
council for a bathhouse. When a town
has no major league ball team its folks
get strange notions about the use Of
time.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10
Union suits sometimes go on a strike

Imagine the college graduate in a
few days asking for a job In a grocery
and telling the boss he belongs to the
Philomathesian or Delphian club.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

The la on the mountain gets a good
view of things below. but he cant see
SO high as the a In the valley. for
he is nearer the clouds.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

All, happy days of summertime, when
kids may run and yell and climb. The
little faces shine and grin when school
is out and joy is in.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

The kids faith is shaken some when
he observes that Santa Claus is wearing
dads turquoise ring.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

The farmer was pouring brown sugar
into h maple sap. I'm in a syrup
titious business. he murmured.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

II the white carnation is the emblem
for Mothers Day why not the poppy for
Fathers Day?
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

One of the most difficult feats in be-
ing humane is being kind and fndulgent
to other peoples bugs.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

The Star extends the privilege of these
columns to the public and invites signed
communications of not more than one
hour.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

Where is the man who used to say
Let 'er go, Gallagher
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

w. P. Boreham is an insurance So
iicitor at Fon-du-Lac., Wis, speaking
of names.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

MOST ANYTHING

Here's a book you'll like"
Have you read it?"
mo, but my wife has, and I noticed
she hid it from our daughter
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

When a widower marries he SHOULD
stop wearing his first wife's tooth or
his watch-chain.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

A true friend is one who loves you
still after he has heard you tell all your
funny stories.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

Professor Thomas says women are
savages. Look out, professor, they'll
scalp you.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

Most men seem to think that they are
too fat to travel in the straight and
narrow way.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10
Unrivaled.

Unrivaled.
Prospective Employer (perusing ref
erence)-Have you any knowledge Of the
silk and satin department?
Applicant-Spent all my life among
EN-, sir.
Prospective Employer-And sheets and
blankets?
Applicant (forcibly)-Born among 'em,
sir.-Town and Country.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

ton she CHANGED to overhear between
two chauffeurs in a Western city while
she was waiting for her car to be made
ready for her.
well, Bill said one. what's new7
You certainly iook played out"
"Oh, there's nothing new, Jack" the
other replied. TITS just work, work.
work, from morning until night"
"You probably need a rest, a vacation.
How long have you been at the job?"
IT start tomorrow" answered h weary
Bill.
william ]. Burns. the detective, was
talking to a Philadelphia reporter about
a case that had failed.
1.-THE case failed" he said, because
they misread the clues. In fact, in their
misleading OF clues they reminded me
of a Germantown boy who said one
morning at breakfast:
Mother, I've got the chicken-pox.
Look at this feather I found in my
bed.
Native wit received its just reward
at the Pennsylvania station. Sam, one
of the colored porters, espied a tired
looking colleger bearing a heavy English
bag and, sliding alongside. offered his
services. The weary traveller accepted
the assistance, but not without all the
reluctance natural to an able-bodied man,
As they walked along he looked down
at the small darby straining under his
burden, and his misgivings seemed to get
the better of him.
you'd better let me have that; I am
stronger thar You a.e."
But Sam sided OFF, protesting.
"Yes, boss he admitted hastily, ''you
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

furnish nourishment for the whole globe.
That's what we are all coming to.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

From Brattleboro, Vermont.
A newspaper ad. says: Wanted. two
good, live statesmen TO sell our collins 4"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

It's the last straw that breaks the
camel's back and it's last years straw
that breaks our fond hopes of economy.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

moon Is from the earth, eh?"
Boy-well. gov'nor. I don't know, but
l reckon 1t amt close enough to inter-
fere with me running errands."
He got the Job.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

"Ah, Chauncey Goode. I've found you
out at last. This is Sunday, amt itT'
"Y-yes. I believe it is"
THAT settles It'll I know Just where
you're goin'. You're goin' to Sunday
school. Don't you dare try to deny It.
And 1 thought you was such a bad bay.
tool"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10
The Old story.
tFrom Judge)

Shoes are on the ehiffonier.
Trousers on the floor
Shirts upon the chandelier,
Wife is at the shore.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

make the customer enthusiastic and make
him sign for the book. a thing few will
do without considerable persuasion. In
stead Of taking the pencil, he said:
It's a good book, all right, and all
that. but I can't read. My daughter
she can read, but she has a book"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

After suffering e~xcruciating tortures
for six months from doubling up a per-
fectly sound leg to fit on a wooden
stump the crutch-bearing beggar finally
succeeded In eliciting sympathy from a
passerby. With kindly eyes the stranger
eyed the cripple from top to toe.
You seem 10 be in a pretty bad way"
he said.
Yes, sir" whined the cripple. Gould
not be much worse"
TOO bad" said the sympathizer. ~
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

Mrs. ]. C. Day and her family have
gone to Belmar and will occupy their
cottage there for the season.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

The perennially blooming Lillian Rus
sell has always been a great believer in
fresh air as a tonic without a come
days In a very up-to-date touring car.
She Ia telling her friends Of a
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-06-10

William Page. of Irving street, will
sail tomorrow on the Mauritania for
a visit to his native place, Sheffield,
England. Mr.. Page has not returned
to his. former homo for thirty years,
and will remain away for about two
months.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
NEVER WORRIES AND
LIVES LONG LIFE

Mrs. A. e. Mason, rs years old
yesterday, walked from her home
at 1908 East | street to the Ia
coma Times office and paid the
editorial force pleasant call. De-
spite her age, she can read, write
and sew without glasses, and her
own teeth are in perfect condi-
ton. She has raised eight chill
dren and was born in southern
Illinois when that section was a
wilderness.
Regular hours. she says, is re-
sponsible for her long life. She
retires early and arises early and
NEVER WORRIES. Worry kills
off a lot of people before their
time" she remarked, after saying
life was just as sweet to her now
as when she was young.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
ACCIDENT" MADE HER AN ARCHITECT; NOW THE PROBES
SION NETS MISS FAY KELLOGG $4,000 A YEAR

Miss Fay Kellogg, New York's
first successful woman architect,
declares she is in that profession
"by accident" But that "acci-
dent" which first brought her IS
per week today is netting her
$4,000 per year. Better still, 1t Is
bringing her absolute Joy and con-
tentment in her work.
The accident" was parental
objection to a medical career.
Her father offered her a course
in drawing instead.
After two years instruction in
Washington, and a year in Pratt
institute, Brooklyn, Miss Kellogg
began the discouraging task Of
LOB hunting" Eventually she
found employment at IS a week.
Later she went to Paris to
study and was admitted to the
atelier of Marcel di Monclos,
where she worked along with the
men doing the same projects. She
wished to be admitted to the
Ecole de Beaux Arts, but no
woman had ever applied, and they
declined to give her chance
even for examination. She met
a member of the chamber of depu-
ties and suggested that he intro
duce a resolution admitting wom-
en- to the Ecole. He followed her
suggestion, the bill was passed.
but too late for Miss Kellogg. She
spent her two years in France
and was ready to take up her
work at home.
For the past six years Miss
Kellogg has had her own office.
Since then she has erected a 16-
story building in San Francisco,
a railroad station, office buildings
and several minor works. With
the exception of the San Fran
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
y

A military ball given under
the auspices of the national guard
Will be held this evening at the
armory. Gov. and Mrs. Hay and
staff, Adjt. Gen. Llewellyn and
other prominent figures in the
service will be in attendance. The
orchestra will number 10 pieces.
John S. Baker left today on the
Shasta Limited for California.
The II. Z. l.. club entertained
last night at a subscription CO.
lonial dance at Sloan's hall.
The New England society will
entertain with a dinner this even
ing at the Tacoma Music Hall.
The active members and Off
GERS of the Children's Industrial
Home will meet at the CONNER
cial clubrooms Friday evening.
Vida auxiliary, o. Il. s., will
home of Mrs. James d. Mcintosh,
lfUl NO. FllS.
Gen. Wright circle of the G. A.
r. will give a card party tonight
at the armory in the G. A. R.
rooms.
The Angelus Study club met
with Mrs. j. e. Sampson, 3114 No.
18th st., this afternoon.
Miss frankie Smith was host
ess at luncheon at Whitworth
college today.
Mr.. and Mrs. Augustus Leavitt
left yesterday for trip to Cali
fornia.
Mr.. and Mrs. Samuel Collier OF
Seattle are visiting friends in Ia
coma today.
Mr.. and Mrs. Geo. Browne, jr.,
will return from a wedding trip
to Panama next month.
Miss Doris Newell will enter
tain this evening at cards for the
younger set.
The Aurora club entertained
today at the home of Mrs. Arthur
Stanley, 515 South Sheridan av.
The annual Whitworth college
fancy dress Washington birth
Gay party will be held Friday
evening.
At the Volunteers of Americas
hall on Thursday Feb. 20, there
will be patriotic entertainment
as a benefit to the work.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Careless About Appen-
dicitis in Tacoma

Many Tacoma people have
stomach or bowel trouble which Is
likely to turn into appendicitis. If
you have constipation, sour stom-
ach, or gas on the stomach, try
simple buckhorn bark, glycerine,
etc., as compounded in Adler-i-ka,
the new German appendicitis rem
edy. The French Drug Co., 18th
and Pacific av. states that A SIM
GLE DOSE of this simple remedy
relieves bowel or stomach trouble
almost INSTANTLY. AT all drug
stores and 904 C st.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Glorious Hair for Women
Your Money Back says
Virges Drug Co. if PAR
ISIAN SAGE isn't the
Most Delightful Hair
Dressing, Grower, Beauti-
fer and Dandruf Remov-|
er you ever saw.

Try it ladies on that fair and
square basis. Surely you don't want
TO experiment with common COM
mercial tonics, when larg, bottle
of PARI-IAN SAGE costs but so
cents.
There is a reason for the phe-
nomenal sale of PARTISAN SAGE
in the United States since 1t was
first introduced into America, and
the sales this year are breaking all
records.
And the reason Is plain to ALL
PARTISAN SAGE does just what 1t
is advertised to do.
There lis no reason whatever
why any man or woman should
fail to take advantage of the
above generous offer.
But one thing that has made
PARTISAN SAGE so famous Ia its
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Ladies! Buy Your Embroidery in Philippines
WORLD
BY Dorothy Stanhope.

MANILA, p. l., Feb. 22.-Every
woman who comes to the Philip
pines plans to get many of the
white embroideries for which
these islands are noted. She won
ders where she can find them, and
on the ship besieges any fellow
passenger who may have been
here before with questions on this
point.
She is told that she does not
have to go to the mbroideries,
they come to her. Philippine
women with their bundles and
Cinnamon with their suitcases are
seated in the corridors of the ho-
tells all day long, especially Just
after the arrival of a ship Some
times the vendors have their wares
temptingly displayed for any
chance buyer, but more often they
are kept carefully covered until
someone can be induced to stop.
The peddlars visit the Ameri-
can houses repeatedly; sometimes
as many as a dozen day. The
prices asked are ridiculously low.
The embroideries are invariably
white, the blue and white being of
Chinese workmanship. The main
articles of stock are waists, but be-
sides these there are entire
dresses, night dresses, children's
dresses, caps, underwear, etc. Both
material and embroidery are i'm
maculately clean, in contrast to
small pieces of extremely soiled
handwork seen in shops in the
United States.
Formerly, this embroidery was
done on the flimsiest material.
which stood little wear. Now most
of it is done ON pearline and
nainsook, used in our own coun-
try. Many American women, who
expect to have embroidery done,
bring the materials from the Unit
ed States, especially in the line of
table linen. Order work is al
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Not A MikIER
crown for ~
Youth r. y

A head full of unsightly gray
and faded hair.-Why not have
beautiful. natural colored hair, full
Of life and beauty-keep yourself
young looking and fascinating2
Every woman wants to be and
Gan be, II she will use HAYS
HAIR HEALTH to restore those
tray hairs to their natural color.
1t isn't a dye.
You'll be surprised how quickly
the gray hairs vanish and how
young looking you can keep your
self by the regular use of HAYS
HAIR HEALTH. Get your money
back from your druggist IL you are
not satisfied with It.
800 and SOC at Drug Stores or d.
rept upon receipt of price and DEAL
prs name. Send 100 for trial bot
NeTIPhilo Hay Spec, Co, Newark.
FOR SALE AND RECOMMENDED
BY GROWN DRUG co.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Has q Man the Right?


Dear Miss Grey: DO You
think a married man has a
right to keep his trunk
locked and have things i'm it
that he doesn't want his wife
to see? He tells me there
are things i'm it that he
doesn't want me to see. Last
night he opened it and l told
him If he locked 1t. would
break it open, and he locked
IL. Shall i keep my word?
NJ. IL.
Al think he said that Just
because you are so curious, and
so emphatic about it. Members
of my own family have Away:
kept their trunks locked, or not
just as they pleased, and it hes
never occurred to any of the
others to question 1t. Your hus-
band may have his insurance
papers, or other papers of interest
in his trunk, and keeps it locked
for safety. You will never gel
by demanding it. espe-
rally if you do it in a spirit oi
I think you are laying
up trouble for yourself in this
natter.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
Hill Wins Priz :

Matthew Hill won the $40 first
prize at the High school oratori-
cal contest last night, with Ford
Brown $40 second, and Edwin
Andrews $40 third. The prizes
were given by the Sons of the
American Revolution.
Hill spoke on Our Enemies,
the Tories" Brown on Samuel
Adams, the Poultar Leader" and
Andrews ON William Pitt, the
Empire Builder"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22

broideries. These are sold in the
States for almost as small a price
as here.
While Filipino embroideries are
universally admired, it is not COM
monty known that the Filipino
women are considered by experts
as among the most skillful workers
in the world. Their work has been
given rank above that of the
French and Swiss. The conditions
under which 1t is done are usually
very poor and crude, and much of
the work is of a style for which
there Is little demand.
To some extent instruction Is
now given in public schools, to the
end that modern styles and suit
able materials may be used, and
the benefits to the workers thus
increased.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22

ways placed in the shops, whose
specially is embroidery. Here the
most elaborate work is done, but
even so the prices are not high.
Several women, who peddled en-
broideries during the earlier years
of the American regime. now have
shops with many women working
for them.
The women peddlars are very
picturesque In appearance. They
speak a mixture of English, Span
ish and Tagalog, making the sign
language most essential in their
intercourse.
Since the duty on Philippine
goods entering the United States
has been removed, wholly or in
part, several large dry goods
houses in large cities have sent
over their buyers to collect en-
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-02-22
To Entertain.


Dear Miss Grey: You are
very good TO give advice. and
1 am sure You can give some
suggestions that will help
me. Here Is the problem: OF
late all the young folks have
been gathering ut first one
and then another's home ON
Sunday night, just TO be to-
gether and have good, So
cial time. They all have
pianos but me, and we spent
the evening In singing and
having music. Now. l want to
have them at my house soon,
and am afraid they will find
II dull. Can you suggest
something? There viii be
eight of us. A. II.
Aust chase that dull ide
away. for there is no need of II
A Jack Horner Pie" is a sourc
of fun. Fill a pan or disk wit
written or printed jokes, conon
drums, witty verse, etc, cut fror
Puck. Judge and other magazine
and on the top you can rest
real pie crust. Each one "sick
In his thumb" and pulls out
joke, which he reads. Don't som
Of the young people play an In
strument they can bring wit,
them? II 1t Is near Washington
you can have a contes
Of cutting cherries jred candy
from a tree, and give a littl
prize.