davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
sELF-GovERNNfENT FOR ALASKA

There is a bill before congress pro-
viding that Alaska shall have a terri
torial governor and a legislative body
for the enactment of laws dealing
with it's internal affairs. Such bill,
properly safeguarded, ought to be
passed. 1t is high time that this much
needed relief were granted to the big
northwest territory.
Alaska was a fine bargain for this
country. When it was purchased, in
1857. for $7,20O,O0O, the price of
good downtown block in New York.
Russia was obviously glad to get rid
of 1t, and there was much grumbIing
among the people of the United States,
even though they understood that the
motive of the national government was
to prevent England from obtaining
control of any more of the Pacific
coast than it already possessed. But
the territory has produced, since its
purchase, over and above the price
paid and the cost of government ser
vice, at least $41O, 100000. And only
the surface of a small part of its
mineral deposits has been scratched.
Private capital discovered that
Alaska was a rich prize before the
country and the national government
realized the truth. Owing to it's
wealth. making opportunities and the
powerful interests that seek to monop-
Ollie them, the territory presents in
tricate problems in government Cor
porate greed must be held in check
and the common American citizens
given a chance. There is a consid-
cradle population in Alaska now and
it will increase constantly. Surely
the people who live there are entitled
to as much self-government as may
be possible without jeopardizing ma
tionaf interests. And as surely they
have a better understanding of their |
own needs and those of the territory |
than senators and representatives |
thousands of miles way, most of whom |
have never seen it.
AS for the interests" that seek to
seize Alaska's mineral wealth, the ma
ional government can continue to
keep strong hand on them, even
with home rule established
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
QUAKER MEDrTATIoNs.

TF,ron the Philadelphia Record.1
To forego a pleasure is harder than L.
go for it.
1t is almost as easy to give advice az
not to take it.
When some men feel the need OF ex-
ercise they run for office.
Many a man goes up like rocket, but
that may be better than not going up
at all.
We all have some good in us, but some
times it takes a lot of coaxing to bring
1t out.
Every man is popular with somebody,
even though it may merely be with HIN
self.
Some girls are so modest that they
would. blush If a man should mention a
garter snake.
1t sometimes pleases one-half the world
to realize that the other half doesn't know
how it lives.
The ideal man is a mythical creature
that only exists in the mind of a woman
before she marries him.
Hoax-"Every year Kansas has a corn
carnival" Joax-"What Is that; a con-
vention Of chiropodists?'
well, I guess I'll take my own time
about it, remarked the prisoner who was
sentenced to six months.
Chollie Saphedde-"Mis Antique
minds me of an old friend of mine" Miss
Pert-'I didn't know you had any friends
that old"
'If our enemy snite US on one cheek,
what should we do?'' asked the Sunday
school teacher. THAT depends on how
big he is replied Willie Wise.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
GLOBE SIGHTS
BY THE ATCHIsOH GLOBE.

A general manager has to step on a
lot of toes.
Husbands and cantaloupes all look good
on the surface.
An optinist is apt to exaggerate the visi-
BILE supply of hope.
Some consciences need more or less
assistance from the courts.
1t takes some people long while to
learn that personal abuse isn't much of
an argument.
People who don't know where they're
going are much more numerous than
balloon pilots.
A forger is another high-prtced writer
who sometimes has trouble getting his
efforts accepted.
Besides trying to hold his job, man
doesn't often make much preparation for
a hard winter.
If woman has been to Canada, she will
talk of Going Abroad as freely as if 1t
had become a habit.
A bride who thinks she will soon be
able to own her own automobile, is often
satisfied with a ball-bearing washing ma
chine.
Where whipping may improve one boy
it will create grudge and a thirst for
revenge in another. Parents have several
problems besides making a living.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[Frorn the Chioago News.1

Many mans courage isn't skin deep.
Worthless people are often more anus
ing than worthy ones.
When two smiles come together in 6
head-on collision the result is kiss.
A man likes to acknowledge his faults
to a woman who insists that he has none.
1t is said that there are people who have
money and do not know how to enjoy it
Sometimes girl misses a good thing by
pretending she doesn't want to be kissed.
One way for a man to find out just
what a woman really thinks of him is t }
make her angry.
Nothing jolts married man more than
to have his wife spring one OF his love
letters on him.
The child who is afraid of the dark may
become politician when he grows up
and fears the light.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
AYHAWKER JOTsS

| AS the Minneapolis Better Way says:
| The man who misses the last train
home usually catches II"
There is need for a new party, thinks
the Hutchinson News, which will
promise more hot weather in the winter
time and more cold weather in the
summer
About the time of year for picnic par
ties at the Forbes grove on the Cimar-
ron, suggests the Liberal News. The
mosquitoes, ants and chiggers are anx-
iously awaiting.
Undoubtedly, there is excellent
method in a plan followed by the
Beaver Valley Booster of printing It's
Sunday School Talks and it's current
political news and forceful comment On
the same page.
A few Kansas weeklies print rolls
of honor each week wherein appear
the names Of their patrons who have
paid up on their subscriptions Rolls
of "dishonor' showing the names OF
those whose subscription money has
long been overdue might be more eff
fective in gathering in the shekels.
Betting is about two to one that the
favorite pursuit of the Hazleton cor
RESPONDENT of the Barber County Index
IS pitching horseshoes. Here's a COM
plant he had to make recently: What
aggravates US is that when we are
looking for a job of work, the men
wanting hands are offering the wrong
kind of work. Last week every man
hunting help wanted wheat pitchers,
and we want to husk corn. So far we
are out of job. Corn husking is our
long suit.
Dick Tagraph, of the Wa-Keeney
Western Kansas World, has recorded
and repeats some bird lingo as follows:
There is so much local politics this year
that even the birds are taking part
in the campaign. hooking bird
mounts phone pole up on East War
rer. avenue every morning about three
o'clock and gets off rignarole which
sounds very much like this: "Kumyear
Kumyear, ridgway this way! Sickem
swig it, Syferifer, syferifer, syferifer!
Fawker hawker! Huntem ketchem
kcokem eateml PeersuIn fearsum,
mixer mixer! Hurripee larrupee! BelIten
benson, beltemi Killemkelli, killemkelli!
Hay aisy. haisy azyl Bakeraker,
baker aker! Ridemrodem, ridemrodem
ridenrodemi Ocker poker, ecker
pockerI Ramhamlam, rahamhamlam!
Hixem fixem, hutzf futzi, willy willing,
willy willing! weeler-wiler, weller
willer, weeler-willer! Nelly-noddle,
nelly-noddle, kumyear, kumyear., ETC."
Then there is a raincrow in the court
house park which keeps up an ominous
'k-r-o-u-s k-r-o-u-S, g-r-a-w-f-t
g-r-a-w-f-t'' all day long, and every
evening abe ut shutdown a pair of turtle
doves which make their habitat near
the J. w. Phares residence keep saying:
It's up to you! It's up to yo-o-o-oi''
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
HUNOR or THE DIP

Language and Religion.-The man who
tells this story claims that its hero was
an Irishman. At any rate, the language
makes a fine bull. A preacher had deliv-
cred his prize sermon, exporting his hear
ers to embrace the religious life and scorn
the attractions Of wealth and late sup
pers. He concludes with this center shot:
My brethren, let not this world rob you
of peace which it can neither give nor
take away."-Popular Magazine.
Jimmy-Pa, wish 1 could be a pirate
and sail the Spanish main and scuttIe
the ships. Mrs. Scrimp-Wen you just
pirate some coals.-Detroit Free Press
Judicial Decisions.-"Father, what do
you think of the recall?' well, my dear,
dangerous. But why do you askg' 'I
sent Ferdy away last night, and now I'm
sorry."-Detroit Free Press.
Married.-Mrs. Bridgely-5eems TO me
you're pretty unsociable for a husband.
You never talk to me when we're alone.
right. What in the deuce makes that girl
SO slow with the supper bell2-New York
Globe.
Crowd Aided.-"You will always ind"
said the soap box orator, that one thing
balances another; , For instance the pres
starch out of the consumer" put in a
man in the crowd.-Boston Transcript
'Is your new maid particular with her
work % Yes, indeed. She breaks nothing
but the best china."-Detroit Free Press
Mrs. Knicker-You shouldn't have heat
ing foods in the summer. Mrs. Booker
Anything I cook makes Tom hot.-Har-
per's Bazaar.
81 thought your father looked very
handsome with his gray hairs" Yes.
dear old chap. gave him those."-LondOn
Opinion
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
AFTER SUNSET.

IookI how on the far hills dirnly grey,
The dusk brings forth the vivid speaking
red
OF grass fires, murky white through all
the day,
That now as funerals of strange mighty
dead
cast their unheeded signal on the night
see how the moon-flower now throws wide
her heart
That would not stir for an the suns
warm light;
No more aIoOf. she takes her fragrant
part
IN the moth-luring sweetness of the dark.
Watch how the stars Indifferent climb the
sky,
How now the FREELY lights his Pickering
spark
And mong shrill crickets silent passes by,
While through the velvet warmth strikes
clear and stark
Some furtive night-thing's thrilling cry.
Mpumu, Uganda.
M. R., in Westminster Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

America were avoiding marriage as
result of national moral degeneracy'
the question would be different. But
that is far from being the case.
The bachelors and the old maids are
doing a good share of the worlds work
And no irlconsiderable part OF 1t is the
assistance they give in keeping famt-
lies together and rearing the children
in them Furthermore, men and wom-
en- in this free country, when it comes
to marrying, will follow their own de-
vices in spite of everything. Which Is
according to the law of nature.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
by THE WY
III HARVEY PARsoDIa

The route taken by the Brooklyn col
ored gent who adopted the Jewish
faith, will not be widely followed by
others of his race. The danger that a
colored Yiddisher would miss his pork
chops is even greater than the fear
expressed by the late Willum Bailey, OF
ragtirne.
Rolla Wells has been appointed to
something or other by Doctor Cover
nor Wilson of New Jersey. But those
who have enjoyed free passage
through the portals of the Novelty need
have no fear. It was another Rolla
Wells.
1t is reported that the big bull mouse
takes bath every few minutes; but
the chances that he will come clean
in November are all to the remote.
Some of our friends were nominated,
and others got it where Alice got the
quincy. One of our friends got it thus
ly through the garbage-can work of
gang of crooks. That friend will be
a respected citizen of Shawnee county
when his detractors are on the rock
pile or the fritz.
But aside from all that; let US offer
up three-or four or five, cheers for
peaceful, modest, Woodworking Swayze!
The daring and attractive bathing
costumes which are threatened in
America, will be of little interest to
Topeka. Vurry vurry few of the To-
peka bawth rooms have glass panels
in the doors.
1.-THE day after" was really the day
after the day after. Hence the short
ness
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
IFrom the New York Press.l

TFrom the New York Press.l
You can do in a second what it takes
years to get over regretting.
Not understanding a subject seems ex-
cuse enough for most anybody to explain
it.
1t doesn't add so very much to the tor
ture to have the dentist try to be pleas
ant about it.
once beautiful woman never seems to
a man to lose her beauty if he under
stands what real politeness is.
One thing a girl never pretends about is
how she likes to have her elder sister s
clothes passed down to her.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Healthy humans have little to fuss
about.
Too many men are judged oy their
mistakes.
Self-control is among the most val
liable assets a man can have.
X Y y
Many politicians of today do their
running for office in automobiles
x -
A naturally good-humored indiv1d-
ual is likely to be imposed upon so
much that he will eventually develop
into a first-class crouch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Apparently not being satisfied with
having jumped over the moon, the COW
and all of her family are evidently en-
gagged in an effort to leap over the sun.
Steers sold for $10.1O hundred in Chi
cago the other day. And if beef con-
tinues to go up there will be a demand
for the development of a critter that
will be composed almost wholly of SOUP
bones
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
driving at

One of the items in the high cost of
living these days that few people take
into account is the high cost of keeping
the political pot boiling all the time. A
real political reform would be to
lengthen the terms of state and county
offices to four years. That would cut
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

subsca FDers of the state Journal
away from home during the summer
may have the paper mailed regularly
zach day to any address at the rate OF
ten CENTS q week or thirty cents
month (by rail only. Address
charged as often as desired. While
out of town the State Journal Will be
20 you like a daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Judge Kenesaw Mountain Lands
has just put a trust-the newspaper
BOILER plate affair-out of business
I'm record-breaking time. If precedents
concerning Judge Lands judicial ac-
tivities are followed, a higher court
will promptly proceed to put it to-
gether again
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Nor is it likely that the confession of
faith which has just been delivered by
Colonel Roosevelt will have the force
and effect that he hopes. It is so
lengthy that not so many of the busy
people in this land will take the time
to read it. And much of it is so vague
and complex that the average citizen
who might read it would scarcely be
able to understand what the Colonel is
driving at
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Colonel Roosevelt and his friends
showed no reluctance to accept the sup
port of any Of the negro delegates from
the south to the Republican national
convention. In fact, they were most
eager to have such negro delegates join
forces with them
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Many candidates at the recent pri-
maries have probably arrived at the
conclusion that any number of Kan
sans do not vote as they talk. Nor is
this phenomenon peculiar to Kansans.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

That pugilist, known to the follow
ers of the ring as Prince Henry"
who has applied for a position as
teacher in the Chicago public schools,
might fill such a bill to better ad-
vantage in one of the rural districts
where it is occasionally necessary for
the school teacher to whip the town
huIIv
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Colonel Roosevelt has invited the
women to make their fight for suffrage
under the wide and f1lmy wings of the
new party. Colonel Roosevelt wobbled
around a good bit on the woman s
suffrage question until the time came
when he was DESTROYS of getting the
support of all sorts and conditions of
men and women to help him on his way
to a third presidential term.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is 3 member OF the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
ganfzAtion for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka.
The news is received in The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pARA-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

out one bunch of primaries and cleo
items, and great would be the relief to
the people, not only financially but also
in variety of other ways
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

All of the statesmen in the whole
world. working twenty-four hours a
day and having things their own way,
could not complete the Roosevelt pro-
gram for bringing about the millen-
MUM in a century
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

CHRISTOPHER DUDES

In this busy season of the year when
all mankind may find employment at
remunerative compensation, we still
see bunch of "grasshopper dudes
loahng about streets or hanging over
the pie counter of every town one to
four days each week. They work a
lew lew days now and then, enough to de-
fray the expense of a few packs and
papers, loud tie and high collar and
some cakes and candy for themselves
and lady fair, but never put cent in
the bank for the dull season. This
same bunch will be complaining next
winter that they cant find nothing to
do" and stick their feet under the
table of their Woodworking father,
mother or some overly kind friend
with promise to do wonders just as
soon as they can get a job in the
spring. But as soon as spring comes
thy will work long enough to get a
new lemonade suit and then grass
hopper all summer as usual. The
young fellow who is willing to do good,
steady work is never out of a job, new
er busted, has plenty of friends and il
a benefactor to the community in
which he lives, but the "Grasshopper
Dude is scab on the community and
many of them take to Jail like a duck
to water as soon as their parents and
friends pass away and they are put to
the test of work, steal or starve.-Mc-
Louth Times.
HOW TO WIN THE CHAMPIONSHIP
game of life? In language of the ten
mis- court to lose a love set means that
one has not scored a point. Many men
are playing this sort of game for the
same reason that several tennis play
ers have failed to get into the game in
the state tourney; lack of nerve to win
the critical point Often in a tennis
match, victory depends upon one
stroke. If the player fails his opponent
takes advantage of it and defeats him.
Life is not dissimilar to a tennis match.
Very often success hinges on step
taken in the right direction. If there
isn't enough push to make this act sue
cessful, defeat is likely. Over conf
dence in ones ability, shady integrity
and lack of initiative are likely to make
any mans life a love set. PLAY the
game carefully, place your business
strokes well and get plenty of steam in
the blows you make. Just play the
game fairly and like you meant to win
and you will have the big end of the
Iove-set; Failure will score nothing and
you will take the match.-Wichita Bea-
con.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

New Yorks police force has started
to suppress Sunday baseball. Just to
show, probably. that there are more
important things than running down
the murderers of Gambler Rosenthal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
DAFFYDHS
BY U. NOAL.L.

When the weather is warm does the
orphan?
Chow could you be so cruel, John p
If things go wrong in a restaurants
kitchen does the beef-stew?
(Waiterl A glass of water.)
If a rolling-pin is wood is a pan
cake?
l(well, that's differently
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

1t is also a fact that it will take con-
si6erably more than the cheering crowd
which packed the Coliseum at Chicago
to hear Colonel Roosevelt deliver his
war-cry to elect him president for
third term
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Nor is 1t likely that any of the de-
fested candidates will get much salts
faction out Of having to pay their pri-
mary campaign bills.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

Uncle Joe Cannon, it appears, is not 9.
devotee of the shorter and uglier word.
In passing the lie in the house of rep
resentatives the other day, Uncle Joe
used the expression "unqualifiedly I'M
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08

An eastern man offers to teach flying
by mail. And If all flying were done
by mail. the aviators wouldn't have SO
much trouble in getting life insurance.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
FROM OTHER PENS
GRIPPING THE NAVY

II is a shameful state of affairs when
politicians elected to represent the
people In the house of representatives
persist In making an appropriation for
oattleships contingent upon the enact
ment OF legislation favoring their con-
stltuenc1es. We cannot believe that
there is constituency in the United
states in which a majority of the
voters would sustain such action by
their representatives. A third caucus
OF IEe mouse has voted against the
ships The conferrees of both houses
must take the matter up again, but the
chance of getting both the battIeships
required this year is now very poor.
a compromise on only one ship is the
Desf we can hope for. Yet throughout
the country there is-no expression OF
opposition to upbuilding the navy, and
the opposition in congress is admitted
TO be purely political, and due largely
to the fact that there has been no APP
preparation for public buildings
This is curious way to show spite.
The battleships are for no particular
state. as the navy is for the protection
OF the whole country. Mr.. Sulzer. Mr.
Underwood, and others prominent in
the majority are willing to accent the
half loaf of one battlesnfp, which is a
pity. No American familiar with the
needs of our navy, and observant of
the great naval growth of the Euro
pean powers, should be willing to COM
promise even for policy's sake. We
ought to be building three or four
modern warships every year.-New
York Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-08
UNLOCKED VEGETABLES.

N110L1 AD4<I<o-
Just at the present time there Is
considerable discussion going on as 10
the value of knocked food. The ad-
vocates of this idea say that before
the use of fire primitive man took his
sustenance as birds and wild animals
had better teeth, a harder BODY and
was exempt from many of the all
ments from which people suffer to-
day. Therefore, they urge that nature
should be allowed to do whatever
cooking is necessary. These uncook-
ed food advocates are running a close
race with the frugivors, who eat only
nuts and fruits. Those who adopt
this method of eating do not touch
grains or vegeta bles of any kind. The
expense of either the unlocked food
or frug1vor diet is about the same as
ordinary food. and none but the best
fruits, nuts and vegetables are used.
New Orleans Picayune.