davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
SAYS UNCLE CAV

A little of the pristine piety OF
Thanksgiving day may have worn off,
but the spirit of the happy time has
somewhat improved. In the old days
together to give thanks that they had
plenty to eat, enough to wear, a
chance to build their own meeting
| houses, hire their own preachers and
that the Indians hadn't removed a
greater number of their relatives than
was necessary to enliven properly the
pages of Colonial history. Today we
give thanks for the crops that make
the farmers rich, express our gratitu de
that the price of food hasn't left the
table bare and rejoice that the latest
news from the football field says that
the pride of the family is still all in
one piece. Mother counts the end Of
the season of pigslxin and legalized
mayhem as her chief blessing and dad
is glad that Christmas is nearly
month away. If the young folks are
other it is the fact that they are alive,
and thus everybody is happy.
Thanksgiving day brings roast tur-
key, cranberries, mashed potatoes
loosely assorted lot of aunts, uncles
and cousins, together with dividends
for the local produce trust. We are
thankful when they come and thank
produce jobber, who doesn't wish to
part with his profits Taken all to-
gether, the Thanksgiving day of latter
years is far superior to the original
article, with it's morbid joy, Puritan
hats, funny haircuts and stified
laughter.
We have learned that this is a pref
ty good old earth and that when we
say we are thankful we should feel
that way. We have come to know
that the deepest piety is the innocent
laughter born of healthy bodies and
Joyous hearts-that there is nothing
more holy than joy and that joy makes
itself heard and felt for the blessing
of them that give cheer and them that
receive.
We have put away our sober gar
ments and have ceased to affront ma
ture by an oppressive pose of solemni-
ty sadly out of keeping with the oc-
casion. We know that long faces
come nearer to sacrilege than scanct-
ity. We are taking a sane view of
things and are accordingly happy
Copyright, 1912, by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.)
New Minister-"How did you like my
sermon this morning." Enthusiastic Pa
rfshioner-"It was simply grandiloquent."
baltimore American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
IFrom the chicago News.I


A T. an is never so empty as when fun.
Borrowed money often causes a total loss
of memory.
Letters a man doesn't write are ns--er
read in court
It's genuine surprise party II any ons
has good time at II.
A wise man enjoys what .e has vvh,t.
the fool Is seeking Cor more.
Charity covers a multitude of sins-b,,t
they are usually our own sins.
There are no tomorrOws on the ealen1ar
Of the man who does things
An old topper says that none are an tl,,,,
as those who refuse an eye opener
The chap who poses as a 'sKood fal,-,.,
is apt to get the short end OF II evanf,,sas
Nearly every shiftiess man has a hor..-
has a door. - IL ne
small boy doesn't find It very annuzios,
70 40 tne Things his parents are willing tS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
DAFFYDHS
By q. NoALI..

If a dog can dig, can a lamb-chop?
(Get out of the way of that Crimson
Rambler. He's the boob that put the
all in Yale.)
If it damages a country considera-
bly,, how much does the volcano?
CAS- Oat Abar says: If a woman has
a mirror in her room there's where the
carpet will wear out first-)
VIII the Turko-Balkan war tie a
knot in Europe?
John. Get out Of the way and let
the lady pass-)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
JOURNAL ENTRIES

No man is as anxious to reform him
self as he is others.
Putting off the inevitable only adds
to your worries.
y q
Any number of silent people are
wrongfully judged to be wise.
-
Neither do the bald-headed men
make much elaborate bows as the other
fellows.
= \
Beautiful women would he more at
tractive if so many of them did not
know they were that way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
rFrom the New York Press.J

From the New York Press.I
A girl is so afraid of a man in the dark
she snuggles up to him for protection
against him.
A telegram Is always so unsatisfactory
to woman because it never has post
script
What a woman likes about a trip Io
Europe is the clothes she takes over she
can buy there just like the new ones.
man lies little to keep out of trouble
and then n lot to get out.
The average man who wants to be ger
erous begins with himself 50 strongly ne
can't got any further.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
NATURE FAKERs.

The g. o. P. elephant.
he Democratic jackass.
The T. r. bull moose
The Tammany tiger.
The wolf at the door
The bee in the bonnet.
The bulls, bears and lambs of Wall
Street.
The fly in the ointment.
The cat OF nine tails.
The. dogs OF war.
The bull in the china shop.
The rat in the hair.
The Welsh rabbit.
The turkey frotter.
The bunny huEger.
The dog in the manager.
The snake in the grass.
The bug in the ear.
The stag party.
The round robin.
Harvey Peake in Judge
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Andrew Carnegie announces that the
great bulk of his immense fortune is
to be devoted to sweet charity. But
If all the people in the country who
think they are deserving of a little
were to get a share, none of them
would be helped on his financial way
to any great extent
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Congressman Phil Campbell is not
chasing rainbows when he expresses
the opinion that the Republican party
will come back" and come back
strong. Evidence is piling up every
day that the Bull Moose movement
was nothing more than a big flash in
the political pan.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Basketball comes next. But it's such
a ladylike affair that it has failed as
yet to attract much public attention.
However, it gives the college athletes
a chance to continue their physical
curriculum without a break. Maybe
that's a sufficient excuse for it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Some of the Kansas cities that de-
vote considerable of their energies to
making faces at Topeka and the stor-
les of its growth in population and
increasing commercial prosperity, have
probably had their eyes opened a trifie
by the fact that two old two-story
buildings on 25-foot lots on Kansas
avenue recently sold for 100000 in
cash
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

One of the prominent aviators gives
the expert opinion that angels need
wings fifteen feet long in order to fly.
But most theatrical angels fly when
their legs have been heightened as far
rs they will go.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Good words for President Taft are
coming thick and fast from all sec
lions OF the country and large vari-
city of sources. Even the National
Suffrage association gets in this game
by passing a resolution commendatory
OF the president. And before many
years have passed the whole country
will awake to the largeness of Mr.
Taft's caliber in all things and to the
fact that he served in the presidency
with most unusual distinction.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

II Ortie MECHANICAL is telling the
truth, it's a good thing that Detective
Burns was placed on the job and that
he rounded up the synamiters when
he did. McManigal insists that the
McNamaras and their pals had plans
made to wipe Los Angeles off the map
and also blow up the Panama canal.
Desirable citizens, these gentlemen
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Gloom must perch on the roosts of
the alarmists who were predicting
few months ago that there was a ire
mendous decrease in the supply of
turkeys as compared with other years,
and that it would not be long before
the classic fowl was almost extinct.
Turkeys happen to be more plentiful
this season than in many years, and
are considerably cheaper accordingly.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Neither is there anything unusual in
the fact that the British public is OPP
posed to a general European war.
That's the attitude of all sensible peo-
ple in respect to war.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
KANSAS COMMENT
MORSE THAN WAR.


War horrors have been dished up 10
the newspaper reader in abundance
even to superf1uity in these recent
days. Balkan dispatches stop at no
mere skirmishes; dead are numbered
by thousands and wounded by the tens
of thousands; devastation of torch ana
sword and mAssacres semi-barbar1c IN
their thirst for blood add the hnishlng
touches to a picture that repels. Yet
the horrors of war are surpassed by
the horrors of disease in the land
where armies have congregated TO
slaughter each other. Cannon and
small arms are less deadly than the
scourge of cholera which sweeps both
sides with awful inpartiality. SO ter
rife is it's onslaught that both armies
may be compelled to stop because OF
the plague. The latter danger Is not
necessarily one Of var moro than II Is
of peace except for the fact that the
unsanitary conditions OF some OF tne
camps may have intensified the suner-
ing and aided in the spread. Otner
diseases, less deadly. carry on their
ravages against citizens in all the
known world, yet because the victims
are picked of by sharp-shooters: one
at a time, less attention is PAID 10
them. The plague on the TURKISH DOT
der attracts world wide attention be-
cause Of its extent, yet 1t emphasizes
the need of sanitation everywhere, CIV
ing as it does the horrible example OF
the results from the lack OF it.--Salina
Journal.
BULL MOOSE DISSATISFACTION.
The first prominent detection from
the Bull Moose party is announced
from Pennsylvania, where Boss Bill
Finn has served notice that he will
take all of his followers in both houses
of the Pennsylvania legislature. into
the Republican caucus. This action on
Bill F'linn's part, probably means the
end Of the Bull Moose party in the
very state where 1t made the strongest
showing. and It is a peculiar thing that
this howing was made under the lead
ership of the most disreputable poll
tician attracted to the Bull Moose
movement. When Bill Finn Joined
that movement, he was received with
open arms. He had been discredited
in the Republican party, but he was
heartily welcomed by Roosevelt. There
will be no joy in the Republican party
over his return; leaders of his char
acter are not needed; they properly
belong to the Bull Moose party and
should stay with their own kind. AS
far as Republicans are concerned, the
only element Of Importance in the mat
ter, is the indication of the inevitable
collapse of the whole movement
Cherryvale Republican.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Experts in the premises insist that
the people of this land eat much more
turkey and other expensive truck on
Thanksgiving than they do Christmas.
This sounds reasonable. They don't
have any presents to buy on the side.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

deputy marshal chased 20 miles
after three men who had sold whisky
to Indians. Yet if he had applied to
some nkely-looking wayfarer he pro-
badly could have got drink.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

The south apparently is trying to live
down it's reputation for being nom
literary. The demand of it's people
for the government Blue Book is some
thing enormous.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Conditions are certainly ripe for the
forthcoming session of congress to
break all records OF the do-nothing
variety,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

accident he should, he would not enjoy
such luck.
1t may be, of course, that we should
be more lenient with fiction, but the
Bunk Beans story reminds us of the
half-dimer wherein a weeks Install
ment ended with:
Raising his trusty rifle, he fired.
(Read our next issue if you want to
know what he hit.)"
Beverage says the Republican party
will disappear. However, the Repub-
lican party should wait for further
evidence before crawling into the
oubIiette or the canning factory. 1t
may be remembered that Mr.. Bever-
idge also guessed that one Roosevelt
would be the next president.
The Bald heads are holding a con-
vention in Connecticut. We are pri-
vately informed that a hot discussion
arose among the delegates as to wheth-
er they should hold it in Connecticut,
which only few of them could SPELL
or hold 1t in New Jersey, and wear
hats during the meetings. 1t seems
that Connecticut won because the ses-
sion was so short that few of them
would have to write home.
Hennery Allen has been nominated
for Governor of Kansas on the Bull
ticket. local photographer has NOM
mated this department for dog-catcher
on his own ticket. Hennery and this
mary.
But the Bulls should go ahead and
nominate Bill White for attorney gen.
eral. True, Willum is not a lawyer,
but his legal opinion upon the validity
- LoT Io%e In. da1x
than any decision ever offered by a
supreme court justice.
A farmer near Jetmore, Kan, has
succeeded in raising a crop of some
Chinese vegetable-kowling-b name
A description of this vegetable is lack
ing, but it is safe to assume that it
yellow in color.
HOWEVER, the Kansas farmer who
continues to raise wheat, corn and
other strictly native vegetables, will
have an auto before the Rowling
specialist can afford bicycle.
In our wild effort to find a wheeze
wherewith to enliven this dreary col
yum, we frequently call upon other
members of the force. Today we called
upon the 'f1irnsy'' editor. He tore off
an item which announced the bean
crop Of the San Joaquin valley to be
80, 900 sacks, and observed: 'fYou ought
to be able to get a squeak out of
that"
According to a local express driver,
he unloaded a barrel of linament at
the south wing of a certain cross
shaped building, and was cussed to
frazzel because the shipment was two
barrels short.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Nor do so many OF the football play
ers seem to get their pictures in the
papers in after life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

Governor Wilson will be another
minority president, it is true, But he
obtained no less than 2,226,0S6 votes
more than his nearest competitor,
which is doing fairly well.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

It's to be hoped that the thread"
on which the peace of Europe is hang
Ing IL a good strong one.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
FROM OTHER PENS
HEAVY ORDERS FOR CARS.

The announcement from Pittsburg thar
a record period is being established for
railroad equipment orders will be received
with keen interest and approval by the
public Big orders for cars have been
placed by several western companies, and
now the Delaware, Lackawanna & West
ern has given orders for 1000 freight cars
of various types, while 10000 cars are i'll
volved in inquiries by the New York CeIl-
trail, the Pennsylvania and number OF
smaller companies, which it is believed
will eventuate in the placing of heavy OF
ders. No doubt such expansion is fully
justified by the great growth of business
throughout the country, especially since
the construction of new railroad equip
ment. halted by the panic of 1907, was held
down to the minimum during several
years in which the companies had more
cars than they needed. However, constant
wear makes it necessary that equipment
be replaced, whether business expands or
not, and doubtless the time was due for
substantial expenditure in thi regard ever
if the country had not been overtaken by
a season of record production and expand
ing prosperity. At any rate, there is no
doubt that ready use will be found for all
the cars put in operation during the next
few months.-Springfield (Mass.) Union
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
by TIE WAY

From his picture in a morning pa
per, we gather that L. M. Wood Is
either an enemy of the photographers,
or that he has Changed Greatly dur
ing the past 371s hours, and is now
nearly as young as he used to be.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF TILE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The state journal In n member Of the
Associated Press and receives the fun dAy
talaxfaph report OF that great news Or
xanfsAtion for the exclusive afternoon
@ublfcataom In Topeka
The news I'm received I'm The State Jour"
al building over wires fOr this sole pun.
D0Oa.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

The trouble with the Bunk Beans
story in the Satevepost is that no such
boob ever lived to maturity, and if by
accident he should, he would not enjoy
such luck.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28
WOMEN DRINKING.

That Anti-Saloon league lawyer in
Washington, who told the Women's Chris
tan Temperance union that while the
men folks were drinking less and less, the
young women, and especially girls, wee
drinking more and more every day, has
created quite a storm of indignation. We
all know that the men were drinking
much less than formerly. but attributed it
to the high cost of living, and not to the
fact that the young ladies were taking IL
away from them and using 1t themselves
The other day hotel proprietor in Wash
a young girl under sixteen to drink herself
into a state of helpless intoxication in his
house. And there is, perhaps some basis
for the charge made by the Anti-SaIoon
league lawyer. At all events, if some goo,i
old grandmother could arise from her
grave and see an up-to-date society girl
tossing off bumper after bumper She
would gladly return to the cold embraces
of her earthly couch-Memphis News
Scfrnitar
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

New UNSATISFACTORY did you like my
sermon this morning." Enthusiastic Pa
rishioner-"It was simply grandiloquent."
Baltimore American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-28

1t may be, of course, that we should
be more lenient with fiction, but the
Bunk Beans story reminds us of the
half dinner wherein a weeks INSTALL
ment ended with:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-05-02
FIVE BURN TO DEATH.
Standard Oil Barge ExpIodes in
Cleveland Harbor.

Cleveland, May 2.-F'ive men were
burned to death and damage estimat-
ed at S450,000 was done to boats and
gasoline on the docks when the Stand
ard Oil barge No. SS exploded. The
dead:
LOUIS GALE
FRANK GALE, his son.
FELIX BOUCHER.
NELSON LEVERE.
ALBERT MARQUISE.
All were employees of the Great
Lakes Towing company.
The barge was being filled with
gasoline from 10000 gallon tank on
the bank. Leaking oil on the surface
of the river was ignited and set fire
to the barge.
A terrific explosion Immediately fol-
lowed. The men killed were caulk-
ing another large barge alongside and
were enveloped in the flames which
spread over the surface of the river.
No one was on the barge when the oil
exploded.
The burning oil set fire to four
other boats
The Grassen Chemical company's
dock, the Great Lakes dry dock and
the Standard Oil company's dock
were badly damaged.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-05-02
TODAY IN CONGRESS,
Cheers Greet Underwood's Appearance
in the House.

Washington, May 2.-Senate met at
noon. Rivers and harbor appropriation
bill increased by $S,O64,O O1O over the
house figures. was agreed to by COM
merce committee and will be reported
in a few days.
House met at noon. Resumed consid-
GRAFTON of postoff1ce appropriation bill
Which was amended to provide 81, 900
for the nearest relative of each of
the three America sea post mail clerks
lost in the Titanic wreck
An unusual demonstration greeted
Representative Oscar W. Underwood,
majority leader, when he appeared in
the house, the chamber, which was
crowded rising in a body and cheering
MIN because of his victory in the
Georgia and Florida primaries. Speaker
Clark who was in the chair looked on
smlllngly when the applause continued
House passed postoff1ce appropriation
DILL Began consideration of legislative
executive and judicial appreciation bill
Merchant marine committee formally
reported Alexander bill to equip all
american vessels with lifeboats sufTi-
clent to care for all human life aboard.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-05-02
IN MAD STAMPE EIDE
Men, Women, Children and
Animals in Wild Rush
To Reach Places of Safety
From Advancing Flood.

Torras, May 2.-Women screaming g
and men shouting as they hurried
into their homes and seized their
children and valuables in their mad
effort to reach places of safety and the
the owners to seek safe places, were
prevailed in Torras last night when
the alarm sounded that the levee at
the junction of the old Mississippi riv-
er had given way. Although it had
been known that several weak spots
had developed little attention had
been paid to this by the citizens of
Torras and they were caught unpre-
pared.
Within a few minutes after the
break had become known the towns
people were in panic. Before the
streets were entirely submerged a ma
jority of the inhabitants had reached
places of safety. Three hundred wom-
en- and children were placed aboard
a freight train which had just arrived
in Torras. These were taken to a
point below here.
No loss of life has been reported
but it is feared some fatalities may
occur in the interior, as the water is
rushing through the country SO rapid
ly that sufficient warning may not
have reached those living in districts
remote from wire communication.
Millions of dollars of loss will be caus-
ed by the devastation of some of the
most valuable farms and plantations
in the state, it is feared, by this new
crevasSe