davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
Humorous Comment
They Missed Halt.

Rivalry among automobile manu-.
facturers is acute, II good natured AT
a dinner of manufacturers represen.
natives at Hartford, Conn, one guest
dwelt at length on the remarkable
nopularity of his car and the wonder
fut organization Of its selling force,
'Why lust think Of 1t, gentlemen
said he. "last month our sales aver.
aged a car every two minutes OF each
working day. There was never any
thing like it.
When he had concluded the repre-
sentative Of rival factory arose from
his chair down the table and remark
ed: with the last speakers permis.
sion. would like to offer my conf
ment on his statement that there's
one of his cars sold every two min
utes." Permission was granted. i un'
derstood you to say that you call that
good salesmanship. Am I right?"
81 certainly do" affirmed the pre-.
vious speaker.
"Well, don't; that's all. call II
mighty poor craftsmanship"
What do you mean? demanded
the boaster. "A car every two min.
utes-
poor esmanship-there's no 9th
er name for It. The gentleman forgets
the universally accepted truth that
there's sucker born every minute.
After which the next speaker was
York Press.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
A THANKLEss TASK.

New York Globe: The figures that
Chairman Hines, of the republican ma
tional committee, is able to marshall
to show the economy Of the Taft ad-
ministration are convincing.
In 1912 the disbursements for the
fiscal year were $471 ,190,857. They
went steadily up during the next seven
years till in 1909 they were $685., 000,-
900. In the seven years the ordinary
expenses of the government Increased
s191 100000 year, or at the rate Of
about 6 per cent annually. Whatever
the merits Of the Roosevelt admins
tration, it cannot be said 1t was dis
tinguished for cheese-paring economy.
It was a regime Of great lavishness
when anyone who talked Of as prosaic
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

bread and departed. preferring hunger
to breaking bread with the New York
political leaders. Evidently the other
luncheon guests failed to see the snub
intended for later Dix. O'Gorman and
Murphy stopped for talk with the
governor and q photographer came
along and posed them for a group
picture. But again the governor fled.
He could not be caught in such COM
pany with the camera.
The governor bears resemblance to
one of those immaculate little Fauntle-
roys who are always chasing home
from school up the back streets to
avoid the rough boys on the corner.
The wise parent cuts that kids hair
and hopes, IL he does not direct, that
the youngster will go through that
crowd at the corner and make them
respect him II he has to whip the
whole bunch.
The governors advisers should do
something to get him to overcome that
yellow streak. He cant always be
lodging up alleys to avoid the bad
boys on the corner.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
GOV. WILSON AND THE BAD BOYS

Governor Wilson's actions Indicate
that he believes there is dark plot
among the bad boys of democracy to
lure him from the paths Of rectitude.
He gave some indication of this feel
ing some time ago, it will be remem-
bered, when he advised Col George
Harvey, who had brought him out as
presidential candidate, to retire
quietly to the background as he con-
sidered a boost from the conservative
Harvey knock. Yesterday the COVER
nor displayed the same caution in
avoiding Governor Dix, Charley
Murphy, Senator O'Gorman and Nor
man Mack. He was invited out to
luncheon by the Syracuse state fair
management, but when he sat down
at the table and saw the gentlemen
mentioned seated around the board,
the cautious Wilson took one bite Of
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
SCHOOL DAYS COME AGAIN.

Sioux City Journal It will take a
few days in the Sioux City household
to become accustomed to the clang
Of the school bell. but adjustment will
soon be made. The school authorities
cav everything Is in readiness, but u
is safe to say there will be things 10
do after the bell rings. The teachers
will have to fit themselves to their
classes. and the classes will have to nj
themselves to their teachers. Many
things will be heard on appeal reach
ing the superintendent office and the
appellate court of home jurisdiction.
Perhaps II the children could rule they
would vote against going back to their
hooks. The debate would run to the
weather and the Joy Of living In the
omen in summer days projected into
autumn. II has been great vacation,
and to bring 1t to an end IN the IN
terest Of learning is hardship 10 the
vo,1n gsters Drowned in the open air.
But thew will come around. and settle
down TO experiment in drawing. the
art OF whispering, with more or less
device for the perplexity Of the truant
officer. But school days are mere,
and the mothers do not care II tney
are TO be sure, there is concern FOR
the children, but it Is such reiie1 TO
shift the care and to do some things
in ones own time and according
to ones own inclination. "Good-by.
dearie. and look out for the cars!"
The public school system Is great
institution. There is the change In II
for better men and better women, and
therefore for better living. Welcome,
then. to the clang of the school bell
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
Press Comment.
MerIt Of tho Commission Plan.

Cedar Rapids Gazette: The annual
report of State Auditor Bleakly
shows that the commission governed
cities of the state are getting better
government for less money than when
they were operated under the old
plan The report shows the expendi-
lures have increased slightly per
capita, but that the receipts have
shown a large reduction per capita.
an indication that the taxpayers are
getting great deal more in results
for q considerably less amount of
money. That is one of the tests-if
not the supreme test-of the commits
sion form of government. If govern
ment does not cost less, for the same
results, or II results are not greater
for the same amount Of money. then
would there be little merit in abolish
ing the old form of government.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
LIBERT YvlLLE.

T. B. Ornduf OF Bloomington. II here
visiting at the Mason home and with
other relatives.
Mr.. and Mrs. Thornton Fordyce en-
tertained the Birthday club at their
home west of Libertyville Wednesday
evening. Refreshments were served and
all enjoyed a fine time.
Mrs. Jennie Cox Of Bloomington, ILL.,,
is here visiting with Mrs. Winnie Mason
and family.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ira Peebler returned
home Monday from two weeks
visit with relatives In Des Moines and
Lucas, Iowa.
Mrs. Claude Heston Of Tarkio, Mo. Ii
visiting with relatives and friends here.
Hal Scoval who was operated on for
appendicitis Monday at his home near
Libertyville is In critical condition
but there is hopes for his recovery.
The Presbyterian Aid society gave q
missionary tea Thursday afternoon on
Mrs. Newlands lawn. There was z
large attendance.
Silas Pearson. John Byres and few
others attended the soldiers reunion
at Keosauqua Wednesday.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
Township Ticket.
Gr Justices Of the Peace.
Y W. J. BERRY
n. G. NOSLER
For ConStables,
!: e. A. CRAWLEY
JOHN CHRISTIE.
ARMAoEppoN.

Tho BOISE, l0odO, SJ6toSmdn pui
she's the following editorial: A co,
1butor handles one phase Of the pol
cal situation in the following MAJ
ers
When Mr.. Roosevelt said We
stand at Armageddon and we bat
tie Tor the Lord" or words to
that effect it was evidently an
effort on his part to create a
much needed atmosphere Of
righteousness around his treach-
erous plot to usurp the Office and
blacken the fair name of an hon
orable gentleman. his one-time
friend. But with his customary
bYashness he gave utterance to
the high-sounding phrase without
stopping to ascertain just what
really had occurred at Arranged
don. According to the bible text
(Revelation 26:14-16), the only
human hosts gathered there for
battle were those possessed by the
Spirits Of devils" and they
fought against, not for the Lord.
"A marginal note refers to Rev
citation 20, for a more detailed
account Of the fray, and here we
learn that these human hosts
were led personally by "the
beast" Against them went God
himself. terribly arrayed, riding
the white horse typical Of death
and commanding the warrior
angels of heaven. In the battle
which followed the human army
was utterly annihilated, or, as Mr..
Roosevelt would elegantly express
1t, beaten to q fragile" His idea
Of adapting the episode for CAM
paign purposes was not happy.
for either he must name himself
ethe beast. and class his follow
ers as possessed by "the spirit Of
devils" or he must claim to be
God. and his party nothing less
than the heavenly host. The
former would not exactly suit his
purpose, and as for the latter, 1t
hardly seems as If even his
boundfess egotism would 60 quite
30 far as to claim divinity!
The bible Is a dangerous book
to use as an Endorsement of any
form of untruth, for it is likely
to boomerang back on him who
lightly takes It's words in vain.
I advise Mr.. Roosevelt to drop
Armageddon and substitute some
unscriptural historical battle In
which the opposing armies fought
n the normal way unassisted by
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
The Maine Result.

Burlington Hawk-Eye: The result in
Maine, following up the republican
victory in Vermont, has already re-
suited in big advance In the Taft
movement all over the country, judy
ing by the expressions OF republican
leaders at various points. Immediate
ly following the republican convention
at Chicago, 1t was felt that Taft had
good chance OF election. The feeling
today among republican workers Is
that Taft's chances are tremendously
better than they were then.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

A dispatch from New York says:
Gen. Coxey, who led big army of
the unemployed to Washington about
twenty years ago, Is about to under
take similar crusade" Coxey Is
preparing his plans in advance be-
cause he sees that the country is In
danger of facing the same condition
that 1t faced twenty years ago. Con-
ditions were prosperous when the
election of free trade president and
free trade congress brought disas
ter to the land. The way to defeat
Coxey's plans Is to reflect President
Taft and a republican congress. 1t
would be impossible under a continu-
ance of the republican administration
to raise an army of the unemployed
because such an army could not be re-
cruited from the busy ranks Of labor.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
EVENING STORY.
vERE's VACATION
ey Belle Manlates.
Copyright, 1912, by Associated Liter
airy Press.)

"c,r,s we're says she is going to the
country for a rest!"
Helen poised her paint brush re.
fiectively in mid air, while margaret
stonped in the act Of squeezing de-
pleated tube of vermilion
II am of the opinion" resumed Con-
stance, "that she Is not fleeing the
confines Of art, but from Cary war
borough.
"Poor Cary!" sighed Helen.
moi" protested Constance. Poor
We're! She lacks the courage 70 come
out resolutely and tell him shell nave
~ think" said Margaret though
fully. that secretly We're cares 1or
him"
"1t.s not" quoted Helen, that she
loves Cary less, but art more. She
FURTHER discussion was postponed
Nv the entrance of the subject Of
their remarks, a charming young girl
Nth golden hair and dream-cen'
tered face. ),
she announced.
"Where?" asked Helen succ1nctly.
"To a farm near Chester. q little
town up state, but" she hurriedly
added don't tell any one. You see
I don't want to receive letters even
I want complete rest"
The girls maintained gravity OF
conntenance In spite Of the ludicrous
idea OF Vere's needing q rest.
"Nora Lynne told me about the
Mace. the Locke farm with big,
omfortable farmhouse. She stayed
there last summer. She said there
was nothing to do there but rest"
aYon will soon tire Of It" prophe-
sled Helen.
maybe" suggested Margaret, you
viii meet your fate-in cornf1eld-
and settle down to life OF rural
domesticity."
If / were going to marry" main
tanned We're, II should choose poor
mana farmer, maybe. Then ! could
still pursue my art. A ricn man
would expect me to enter upon q life
Of social duties"
"You ought to give Gary mint OF
the way you feel think ne would
be willing to forego his millions Tor
the sake of winning you
We're looked annoyed, and babe them
an abrupt adieu.
The three artists missed their
Young companion during the next few
weeks. Unlike them she made ire
ouent incursions mot gay life, and
brought an OCCASIONAL fash Of color
into the drab of their life. So when
she returned suddenly and unan-
nounced one day, she received a
heartfelt welcome.
"You are certainly rested" com.
mented Margaret, looking searching
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
sIeoURNE Y

George T. Namur and Ralph Minteer
arrived from Chicago Tuesday They
came through in Mr., Na,nur's car and
are going to make short visit in the
city when Mr.. NaInur will drive to the
Pacific coast.
Amos Weaver came up from Keota
Wednesday to look after business mat
ters.
The republican county central COM
mittee and county candidates held
meeting at the Office Of the chairman
OF the central committee Wednesday.
Plans and ways for prosecuting the
coming capaign were discussed and
reports OF political conditions were
made by the various committeeman.
j. w. Stewart from Marshalltown
representing st. Louis firm was CALI
ing on friends Wednesday.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
The Real Proqresslves.


Richmond v1rginian: LaFollette Is
one of the real progressives OF today.
LaFollete Is against Roosevelt
Louis Brandeis Is one Of the real
progressives Of today.
Louis Brandeis is against Roosevelt:
Gov. Hadley, of Missouri. is one OF
the real progressives of today.
Gov. Hadley refused to follow Roose-
welt into the third party.
Senator Borah is one Of the real pro-
gressives Of today.
Senator Borah refused to follow
Roosevelt into the third party.
So on down the line. How about the
other side?
George w. Perkins followed Roose.
welt into the third party. So did Bill
Finn. Dan Hanna, Heney, Beverage
Ward, Woodruff, Munsey. Mccormick
and others of the same ilk.
LaFollette against Heney; Brandels
against Finn, Borah against Bever'
idge: Hadley against Hanna.
Are the real progresslves found IN
the bull moose party or against It?
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
CRITICS OF THE CONSTITUTION
ARE ADVOCATING DOCTRINES
DISCARDED 1925 YEARS AGO.

Paul L. Ford, historian and writer.
says that this government has at
times been saved by momentary
disregard OF the constitution. Con-
tinuing in his preface Of his edition
of the Federalist. Mr.. Ford says.
what, then, it will be asked, Is the
use Of written constitution when 1t
can be so disregarded and so extend
ed? II a government grows and
changes with the nation it pretends to
control, why seek to bind. the people
at all? Why attempt to limit the
power OF the newest law of congress
by the oldest law of the nation? In
Great Britain the government is
checked only by public opinion, and
the latest act Of parliament is the law
of the land. Is not the latter more
free than the former?
More free, but less stable, we an
swer; more power to the majority and
less privilege to the whole people. IN
this condition rests the great, distinc-
ton of the constitution OF the United
States. History has often recorded the
grant Of rights or privileges to sub
jects by kings or by aristocracies or
by minorities. (The Magma Charta Is
an instance) But our constitution was
the first deliberate attempt and as
sent of q majority to tie it's own hands
to give to the minority guarantees
of fair and equal treatment without
which democratic government Is we'll
nigh impossible, save when developed
along the lines Of socialism. Our
state governments have again and
again oppressed the minority. But
with hardly an exception the national
government has been true to its pur-
poses.
"This guarantee to the minority in
the federal constitution is one OF the
most remarkable examples Of self
control in history and constitutes Its
chief claim to preeminence. The ex-
PLANTATION of it's origin can only be
obtained by history Of the years
preceding its framing"
To a certain extent, England gov
erned the colonies previous to the
revolution. The revolution In the ma
ture of things, did away with the sys-
TEN Of government prevailing at Its
beginning and brought into existence
a sort of popular government. 1t was
the articles of confederation OF the
states. The people were, Mr.. Ford
says, unchecked by the balance u.s.
ually supplied by manufacturing or
commercial interests and the land
holding classes being much in the
majority, ran riot. The creditor was
ruined in one way and the trader in
another"
a The articles Of confederation SIM
ply allowed each state to be govern
ment by itself and the national con-
gress under the articles of confedera-
ton was a joke. 1t could enact laws
but could not enforce them, and very
few men would attend sessions after
being elected to it. To be member Of
the state legislature was regarded
much more Of an honor than to be a
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

Mrs. Harriet Stanton Blatch, the suf-
fragist leader, who aided in the I'M
successful campaign for suffrage in
Ohio recently believes that Col. Roose-
welt Is only a convert to woman's suf-
frage in the states where woman has
the vote and Is not concerned with
the question in those states where
they are seeking the right to vote.
She says: 1.-THE progressive party was
on trial in Ohio and 1t utterly failed.
Roosevelt flew around the state, but
not one word did he say for suffrage.
He did not open his lips. 1t was the
same with Gov. Johnson Of California,
while Mayor Brand Whitlock, of To-
ledo, and Mayor Baker of Cleveland,
spoke again and again in favor of our
amendment"
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

"By the way, what became Of the
plague of seventeen year locusts which
our good friends over at Ames pre-
dicted with such cheerful certainty
last spring." asks the Iowa City Re-
publican. did they come or didn't
they? Has anyone seen locust this
year?''
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
A Record Cast.

Des MONIES Capital The report
that Charles w. Morse Is back at his
desk in Wall street brings to public
notice one of the most remarkable
cases of health restoration of which
the annals of medical science make
any record.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

William L. Wilson, the author Of the
Infamous Wilson law Of twenty years
ago, was college professor and was
born in Virginia. Woodrow Wilson IS
a college professor and was born IN
Virginia. To those who remember the
lean and hungry years when the VIII
son law was in force, the coincidence
of name, birthplace, profession and
political principles have q sinister
ASPECT. IN. w Courier.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

refer the pink sh eet to the home dressmakng depart
ment will not have any trouble In locating Tyrus He
will generally be found at the top Of the batting aver
ages huggng the leaders without any shame
whatever.
A few days ago Tyrus set upon by three total
strangers and entirely surrounded He had left his
right flank exposed, while his left was drawn up IN
threatening attitude nearby But did Tyrus call for
Inducements? He did not Throwing himself rapidly
in the form of halow square he fired with both fists
with so much success that he utterly shattered the
enenays esprit de corps and looeened several expen-
sive teeth. Tyrus not injured in any vital spot
except his feelings.
Tyrus is member of an ancient Roman family,
and when enraged speaks the dead languages with
great uency, hurting long, obsolete words at the UNI
pire in strange tongue He has a mauve complexion
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17


a bird
field surrounded by eight innocent by
almost human
This effective combination they are not called
furnish anything except
mainly eaguers
wild pitches
bat with the bases full the
animal kingdom and the greatest little
Detroit would
abou as much a dance.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

When one Of the noted heroes Of
Japan finds it necessary to commit
suicide, his wife Joining him, in order
to express grief at an emperor's
death, and the people look upon the
act as one of shining patriotism, 1t Is
clear that Japan Is far from being the
civilized nation 1t has been claiming
to be.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

worthlessness OF confederate paper
money at the close Of the war.
Shortly after Lees surrender.
says the general, II was short dis
lance from Richmond. Two confeder-
ate soldiers were going home to be-
como mon Of peace again One had q
lame, broken down horse. which he
viewed with pride
wish I had him. JIM said the
other. What will you take for him?
Ill give $4,000 for him..
"'No,' said Jim.
,"'Give you $50,000.'
No. said Jim.
"'Give you 100000 his friend
urged.
"'Not much replied Jim. ! just
gave $4,000 to have him shod." -
Everybody's.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
What's The Use.

Sioux City Journal Shirley Gill
land, long time senator from the Mills
Montgomery district, has published .
scathing letter reviewing the political
career of Senator Cummins, induced
by the latter's statement that he would
support the national ticket Of Roose
velt's new party. But what's the
use The Iowa senator Is no longer
the leader of the faction he organized.
Metfill Mccormick, the rich young
man Of Chicago, more nearly repre-
sents that distinction. John L. Stew
ems, the Boone lawyer, head OF the
new party state ticket, has precedence
over Cummins.s The real leader In
Iowa insurgent politics, to be sure, Is
Roosevelt, bolter from the republican
national convention, head and bowels
of the new party intended to destroy
the republican party, both In state ana
nation. The senator Is astride the
fence, and wounded.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

either God or the devil and about
the details Of which he is more
accurately informed.
Comment is unnecessary, the Boise
paper adds, excepting, perhaps, to say
that one exception must be made In
depriving the colonel of the use OF
the bible as a campaign document
the chapter devoted to Ananias.
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
Worse Than Free Silver.

General st. Clair Mulholland, vet
eran and historian OF the civil war.
tells an incident showing the utter
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
REPUBLICAN TICKET.
National Ticket.
For President,
WILLIAM n. TAFT

r Fur President.
WILLIAM Fl. TAFT.
For Vice President.
JAMES s.. SHERMAN.
For sixth District Elector,
ELLSWORTH ROM1NGER'
Y sssts Ticket.
For Governor.
GEORGE W. CLARKE
yur Lieutenant Governor,
W. l.. HARDING.
\, For Treasurer,
W. c. BROWN.
For Auditor.
JOHN L. BLEAKLEY.
For Secretary Of State,
w. s. ALLEN.
For Attorney General.
..5 GEORGE COSSON.
For Superintendent,
A. M. DEYOE.
Ypr Judges OF Supreme Court,
r. r. GAYNOR
3. w. PRESTON.
FOR Railroad Commissioner.
n. s. KETCHUM.
Congressional Ticket.
yur Representative Sixth District.
NJ. "A. M'CORD.
County Ticket.
For Representatives,
w. w. EPPS
FRANK SHANE.
y
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17
Sidewalk Sketches
BY Howard l.. Ram
WHY WHO'S WHO.

we desire to congratulate the Hon Tyrus Cobb alias the Detroit ba
readers dressmakng
Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1912-09-17

/ Dntsrsd a. second class mAI ~
foctobsr II, 1905, At the postonlce' IN ~
tumwa, Iowa, under the Acs o. eo'
kExaaR Of March Z, 1879.