davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
CARRIED BY HEAVY MAJORITY
Motion in Fat Mems Annual convep
ton Has 1929 Pounds to
the Good.

Happened at the fat mems annua
cOny ention.
Mr. Chairman wheezed one of tn,
heaviest delegates, Il move you. sir
that no man be admitted to member
ship in this body hereafter who
weighs less than 800 pounds"
The motion was seconded and hall
an hour was devoted to discussing it.
ANY further remarks?"
Silence.
Gentlemen, are you ready for the
question:"
Question:"
%All who are in favor of the motion
will say aye"
"Aye!"
Contrary, no."
mol"
The chair is unable to decide. All
who favor the motion will please
rise"
Thirty-six arose.
BE seated, gentlemen. All who CD
lose the motion will rise"
Again thirty-six arose.
Gentlemen" announced the presid.
ing officer, whose weight was 427
pounds, ut is tie. The chair votes
AVE., and I therefore declare the mo
ton carried by heavy majority"
1t was ascertained later. however
as the result of some figuring. that the
actual majority In favor of the mo
ton was 1929 pounds.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
cERTAIH SIGNS OF POVERTY
impressionable Child Sets Mother
Right Regarding Financial Stand
Ing of Her Neiehbors.

Small Sarah, obserVant and impress
sionable, ran into the house excited
and ont of breath. She had been call
ing at neighbor's house
"Oh, mamma she exclaimed, 6.
thought you said the Smiths were
very, very rich,'
so l did, Susie" the mother re
piled. 1.-THE Smiths are understood
to be worth millions"
Mamma" said the child, 81 don't
believe word of it, I think they are
very poor"
why, SUSIE" remarked the aston
ished mother. how did you get such
an idea into your head?"
"'Cause saw two ladies playing on
a piano at the same time" was Susie's
response
That's often done,' mother ex.
planned. "The ladies were playing a
duet"
But that wasn't all, mamma. Mrs.
Smiths hat looks for all the world
like her kitchen colander trimmed,
and George Smith was wearing his
fathers trousers"
"Why, Susie" commented the moth.
Ell how you talk"
TITS true, all the same, mamma I
know they were Mr.. Smiths trousers,
cause they were so long for George
that he had EN- turned up at the bot
tom Of each leg"
Small Sarah was unfamiliar with
adorned with cuffs"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
Sounds Made bv Elsl1.

The skate, when caught, grunts,
groans and gasps pretty much after
the manner of human being in dis
tress. Carp and gold fish frequently
utter curious sounds, but hardly
sounds in the meaning of the term
mere used, inasmuch as their sounds
are produced by approaching the sur
race of the water and blowing out air
IN bubbles until ripping noise is
heard
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
MAKES THE NATION GASP

The awful list of injuries on a
Fourth of July staggers humanity
Set over against it, however, is the
wonderful healing, by Bucklen's
Arnica Salve, of thousands, who
suffered from burns, cuts, bruises,
bullet wounds or explosions. It's
the quick healer of boils, ulcers,
eczema, sore lips or piles. 25c at
all dealers.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
In the sarber,s Chair.

big fat man stretched himself out
IN a BARRIERS chair. The barber, fol-
lowing the usual custom. soaked his
race in a PIP degree towel, while he
whetted his razor. When he took the
towel off the man inquired If he had
fork handy. q am pretty sure my
face is done. but If you have a fork
handy you might stick it in and see"
-Atchisop Globe
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

1t is now well known that not
more than one case of rheumatism
IN ten requires any internal treat
ment whatever. All that is needed
is a free application of Chamber
lain's Liniment and messaging the
parts at each application. Try it
and see how quickly it will relieve
the pain and soreness. Sold by all
uealers.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
Cod.

The catch of cod In the United
States is third in value of fish caught
amounting to almost $1,000 600 fol.
lowed by that of shad. Holsters and
clans
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

A class which lives only for Itself
and not for the community OF which
1t Is part is bound to perish The
Nemesis of selhshness is extinction
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

WANTED-Position as ranch fore
man; capable of good management.
Apply TO N. E. ALDRICH, Sims
Ranch by phone.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
Well SUPPLIED.

Beggar-Please, mister. give me a
dime for my three hungry children.
Pedestrian (hurrying on)-Dont
need any more, thank you.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

A sprained ankle may as q rule,
be cured in from three to four
days by applying Chamberlain's
Liniment and observing the di-
rections with each bottle. For
sale by all dealers.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

Poets Longest and Shortest PLAY
Hamlet" is the longest of sbsLo
speare's plays and the Comedy =,
Errors" the shortest
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

would as soon shake hands with
a soft mackerel as with a man who
offers two fingers Sir Francis va1a
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

yes; we elected Mrs. De Wealth
president Of the club, thinking shs
would give us something handsome"
And"
We'll, she gave US this portrait Of
herself"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19

There is no real need of anyone
being troubled with constipation.
Chamberlain's Tablets will cause a
agreeable movement of the bowels
without any unpleasant effect.
Give them a trial. For sale by all
dealers.
Rate Schedule Lacking.
1t was the day before Christmas In
one Of the big railroad offices. says
the San Francisco Call. They were
talking about the good old days when
they were all children and there was
10 Interstate commerce commission.
Well" observed the optimist. 81
eue2s old Santa will come around as
Usual"
Nope" replied the crouch. Don't
)cok for him this year"
Why not?' asked the optimist.
Well" came the the answer, "un-
Ter the new law he's a common car.
der, and the old man hasn't fled biz
o te schedule.
Economies.
IL has been found that the things
that expand on solidifying, as water.
freeze at a lower temperature when
he pressure Is increased, while the |
others freeze at a higher. When a
that expands freezes under
higher pressure than usual It has to
'xert more force to shove the pres
ure away. and consequently has to
Use up more of its heat energy, thus
osing more heat and consequently be-
oming colder. II
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1912-07-19
NJ. SILVA, OWNER.

IF TIRES ARE LOOSE,
If axles are cracked or bent, if
springs need renewing, we are
ready to do the blacksmithing
work. There is no job too big
for US to handle, none too small
TO receive out best attention.
SHOE YOUR HORSE, TOO
In way that will make him feel
better and go better. Send him
to US next time.
GEO. WILSON
The Blacksmith
The oasis., 1912-07-27

All trains on the Sonora railway stop at Carbo for dinner. The best table in the country at the depot hotel. Mrs. George Juarez proprietor.
The oasis., 1912-07-27
ARIZONA NEWS.
A. Interesting Column of Items cuIIsd
 From Exchanges.

Tombstone Prospector; k. 5. Krebs, deputy clerk of the Superior conrt. is much interested in raising Homer pigeons and at his Tomb stone pigeon farm has number of prize winning racers. He has several message carrying Homer pigeons who make the trip from Bsbee to Tombstone and have established record of 23 minutes for the flying trip.
 Arizona Gazette: The govern ment canal at Sacaton washed out Wednesday night during the heavy storm which they had in that section. There was no provision made for handling the waste waters and all of the water from off the desert was forced into the canal, washing around all the cement work. which became loose from the banks 0t the canal. Considerable damage was done.
 Artesian Belt: k. A. Washburn contemplates drilling 19 more ar tesian wells on his land southwest of town. So he stated to the Belt man Monday. However, if an air compressor test should be success fully made here in the mean time, rendering it unnecessary to have so many wells, the number may be reduced. At the present time he proposes adding 19 more to the one already completed, making 20 in all.
 Florence Blade Tribune: The work of drilling for bed rock at the Pinal Mutual's damsite has been completed and the results were very satisfactory. No boulders were encountered. Only quicksand and gravel were found, hence there Is nothing between the surface of the stream and bed rock to interfere with the driving of the steel sheet piles, all of which is good news for the land owners of the Pinal Mutt ual Irrigation company.
 Florence Blade. Tribune: It has been learnd from a reliable source, that when the American Smelling and Refining company begin oper- alton, under their option on the property of the Lake Superior & Arizona Mining < Smelling com pany, the Arizona Eastern R. R. company will build a branch road from Florence, or from Alta station, six miles east of here, to Superior. Knowing the topography of the country as we do, we believe the road will be built from Florence.
 Wickenburg Miner: N. A, Daniels, the up-river rancher brought into town one day this week a Gila monster which justi- he'd the last half of it's name, being 2l inches in length over all. It was an old resident of the Daniels ranch, having made its abode there for about four years. It was tol. erated because of its activity in making away with other small pests, but as lately its appetite has taken an aristocratic slant, tending toward hens eggs, it was condemn Cd as an undesirable citizen and prepared for exile to Phoenix, with some museum or circus as its prob. aole ultimate destination.
 Wickenburg Miner: Some mis. CTeA0t Or YOoiooroo ,Dtc box,o LoaYN t~,,
The oasis., 1912-07-27

pLldoulnS NhOhI III Wlbh llAo iCOl oS he went from vine to vine. Another act which was perhaps participated in by several was the robbery of the entire crop of apricots from no less than six trees at La Testa orchard. The penalty far such vandalism should be severe and no doubt this particular individual will learn to be a law abiding citi- zen after awhile when he will have had a session with the law
 Mohave Miner: The govern ment has brought an action against Ora Haley and B. F. Saunders to cancel patent to tracts of land in the north part of this and Coconino counties. It is alleged in the com plaint that at the time patent is- sued and at the present time nei- ther one'of the claimants have been residents of that particular land district. Saunders is an old timer in the north part of this county, but is now understood to be a resident of Utah. The government takes the position that a claimant to lands must be a resident of the district, and the final proof cer- tainly contemplates this view of the case.
 Yuma Examiner: Kelly and Cooper, who have large farming interests here, are in communiea- tion with outside capitalists with a view to establish a beet sugar fact ory similar to the one at Glendale, Ariz. It will be necessary 10 sign up at not less than 5000 acres to beets before the factory can be secured, and this can be done. This beats anything the Examiner has heard of recently, and now that the Siphon is completed and oceans of water is assured, it behooves Yuma's live ones to be on the lookout for other manufacturing interests. The Examiner has in- formation that creamery, backed by local capitalists, will be started within the next three months, and we are now ready for the nextl
 Florence Blade-Tribune: The night blooming cereus is native of the Arizona desert, being a member of the cacti family. One of these plants, situated in Capt. J. G. Keating's yard, bloomed at midnight this week and put forth seven pure white blossoms that were magnolia shaped and about the size of teacup. The blossoms closed up at daylight. This par ticular plant blooms every five years although it has been gen. erally understood that such plants bloom only at intervals of seven years. The century plant, which is also native of this State, blooms here every seven years, thus contradicting the generally accepted idea that this plant blooms only once during hundred years.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
Editorial Page Of Gle Cacoma Cimes
"KICKING THE STATS"

Fighting Bob Takes Off the Lid and Kicks
Roosevelt in the Stats" This is a rather expressive
newspaper heading that is put over the announce
ment that LaFollette continues his autobiography
with story of his betrayal by Roosevelt, Pinchot,
Garfield, Record and others.
Every sensible friend of LaFollette will regret
that he makes of his talents in this direction be-
it belittles Bob, without the slightest advant
age save in the way of small personal satisfaction.
The country is not going to at all base its political
decision the personal grievance of any man, at
any time. Mr. Taft has as strong grounds of per-
sonal grievance against Mr.. Roosevelt as has Mr..
La-Follette, has been often and more publicly
"Kicked in the Stats" by the colonel
The considerable number of very good citizens
who forgive Mr.. Roosevelt for his evident sins of
omission and commission and who accept him a
sincere convert to progressivism will not be deferred
from voting for him. Notwithstanding how villainous
Mr.. LaFoette shows his personal treatment to have
been. These people may be misled they may be mis-
taken, but they urging and standing for princ-
piles, regardless of whose "slats kicked and it
is mighty poor policy to make them mad, if future
with promotion in it is desired for Mr. LaFoette.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
Home Made Tent For the
Autumn Hunter Is Best

Lain. round galvanized iron, 6
in. diameter. Stitch the canvas
at the apex around the hop and
along the sides. Make the apex
into hood and line it with stiff
canvas. Have the tent pole 3 in.
In diameter, made in two sec
lions, with a socket joint and
rounded at the top to fit into the
apex of the tent.
In raising the tent, fasten down
the wall by means of loops OF
stout line fastened to its lower
edge and small pegs driven
through them into the ground.
Fig. 5. Run the stay ropes from
the eyelets in the circular cover
to stakes, Fig. 8, stuck in the
ground. Use blocks, as in Fig. 6,
on the stay ropes for holding the
ends and adjusting the length of
the ropes.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
TAFT WILL BE THIRD

Samuel G. Blythe, the noted writer, after MAX
ing impartial investigation of the presidential
situation in every state except the south for the
Saturday Evening Post has reached just one def
mite and positive conclusion. That is, Taft will be
in third place.
Blythe believes and his investigation undoubt-
edly shows that Wilson has at present a distinct
lead over Roosevelt but Blythe apparently is afraid
to say that Wilson will defeat Roosevelt.
He summarizes the Roosevelt strength impair
tally, almost brutality and he concludes with the
statement that Roosevelt will poll a tremendous
vote.
Other political writer's generally agree with
certain defeat In fact nowhere except in this state
is anybody claiming that Taft has chance. The
standpat papers here, while holding out their false
hopes of Taft success, doing it only in desper
ate effort to save the standpat state ticket.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
TRY THESE
TONGUE TWISTERS

A department for stam-
merers is to be added by the
National Board of Education
over in England and a read
er of the Daily Times sends
us the following tests that
the board might use when 1t
gets busy:
She sells sea-shells on the
seashore.
The shells she sells are sea
shells, I'm sure.
So If she sells sea shells on
the seashore,
Then I'm sure she sells sea-
shore shells.
Here is another one that
should prove an excellent test
of smooth-running tongue:
Kimbo Kemble kicked his
kinsman's kettle.
Did Kimbo Kemble kick his
kinsman's kettle?
If Kimbo Kemble kicked his
kinsman's kettle,
Where's the kinsman's kettle
that Kimbo Kemble kick
ed?
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

The war department has de
cided that the Sibley or conica
tent is the very best. A conica
tent can be set up as quickly, has
more room inside and offers less
resistance to the wind that the ole
style wall tent. They are not ex
pensive or difficult to fashion II
made in the home.
Unbleached canvass tent ducl
is the very best material for the
tent. Make 20 sections, shaped
like Fig. 8, each 10 TT. 6 in. long
and It. 2 in. wide at the bottom
tapering in a straight line to q
point at the top. These dtmen-
sions allow for the laid or Tapped
seams, which should be double
stitched on a machine.
The. last seam sew only for a
distance of 4 #. from the top,
leaving the rest for an opening.
At the end of this seam stitch on
an. extra gusset piece SO that 1t
will not rip. Fold back the edges
of the opening and the bottom
edge of the bell-shaped cover and
bind it with wide webbing, 3 In.
across and having eyelets at the
seams for attaching the stay
ropes. Near the apex of the cover
cut three triangular holes 8 in.
long and 4 in. wide at the bottom
and hem the edges. These are
ventilators.
Make the tent wall of the same
kind of cloth IT. 2 in. high. Bind
it at the upper edge with webbing
and at the bottom with canvas.
Also stitch on coarse canvas G in.
wide at the bottom. and the space
between the ground and the wall
when the tent is raised, fill with
canvas edging. Stitch the upper
edge of the wall firmly to the bell
cover at the point indicated by
the dotted line. Fig. 2.
For the top Of the tent have
the blacksmith make q hoop Of
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

NEW YORK. Oct. 12.--If it
hadn't been for those glowing
Goals
Well, 1t was like this:
BILLY" Sulzer was sitting in
the little library of the Sulzer
home. Outside the wind was howl
ing and the snow was swirling
madly.
Presently Mrs. Sulzer came in
and took her chair on the other
side of the CRATE.
BILLY" looked up.
Say, Clara" he drawled, 81
think I'll tell you something.
"In a few years l am going to
be governor Of New York, and a
few years after that l am going
to be president Of the United
States.
81 am going to do It for two
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

Editor Times: In behalf OF the
Valley Fair association. / take
pleasure In extending to you our
grateful thanks for the boosting
done for the Valley Fair Just
closed.
know you will be Interested
n ascertaining that our fair has
been success from every stand
point. an of the opinion we
viii have sufficient money left to
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

reasons. First. I want to do IL
so / can do some things for the
people that ought to be done for
them. And secondly, / think
you'd make an awfully nice mis-
tress for executive mansionsl"
Maybe Mrs. Sulzer smiled. Or
maybe she didn't. History does
not reveal. But, probably, being
like most other wives, she ac-
copied the statement without
mental scrutiny. 1t was gospel
at least for her.
For anyone else. had anyone
else heard it, it would have been
high humor.
THE democratic ticket can't
fail in New York this year." they
say, with Sulzer leading 1t and
with the bull moosers splitting the
republican forces"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

erect a new building for next
year.
A well conducted fair is a
mighty good asset for any COM
munity. The Valley Fair Is con-
Quoted along clean and progress
sibe lines and should have the
support OF all OF our good people.
With best wishes.
w. III. PAULHAMUS,
President.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
THE LOVE POTION
BY Stuart d. Stone


King Bilbul of Mombul-Beeze
was the ugliest man of his time.
His eyes were crossed like the
eyes of a crab; his face was the
color of old parchment; his three
teeth were yellow as the ingots of
gold that filled his counting
house. Yet for all these the king
was a favorite with women. There
were SO beautiful wives in the
royal palace and when King Bilbul
passed it was strange to hear the
tender goins-on.
"Our lord, the king-behold
his handsome countenance!" lit
| tie Asphodel, the violet-eyed,
would cry; and the others would
sigh and kowtow.
Which was truly marvellous,
considering that King Bilbul was
uglier than any mud fence. Yet
the king did many marvellous
things. There was a great labor
atory which none might enter. and
here he mixed strange potions and
elixirs. Some said the king had
been 1000 years on earth.
But with all his uncanny power
King Bilbul pinned for one thing.
| This was the love of Princess
Carazina, the fairest flower at the
court of Mombul-Bezee. The
king had tried the power of both
the good eye and the evil eye, but
the heart of the Princes Carazina
would not pit-pat for him. And
this was all on account of the
Duke Arturo, who, If the king
was ugly as mud, was himself as
fair as a god.
One day King Bilbul approach
sat in the royal gardens. The
king held in his wishered hand
a goblet of the most sparkling
amber liquor, and his evil left
eye glittered.
''The liquor keepeth the bloom
of the peach in the cheek for
ever" limited the king.
The princess looked curiously
at the goblet. cart sure?"
Bilbul wagged his head. at
lighteth the eyes with fire."
Then the princess took little
sip, then more and more, until
she had emptied the golden COB
let. After that she turned upon
the king. ooh, my good lord, how
l do love thee-thy beauteous
wart-tipped nose and the three
teeth of shining goldl" She
wound her lily arms about the
king, and the Duke Arturo, pass
ing through the garden, came up
on them that way.
After the Princess Carazina
had loved King Bilbul for a
month, the king sat one day with
the princess and tainted the
mournful duke. "See," ne
called, lifting a golden goblet, 81
will give the princess to drink,
and she will love me yet more. -
So saying, the king gave the
princess to drink, and the prin-
cess slipped at the contents as she
looked roguishly at Duke Arturo.
But no sooner had the potion
been tasted than she turned
fiercely upon the king.
"Why, thou hideous crab-fac I.
Thou ugly bag of wrinkles! l spit
IL stamp at theei"
AS the king gaped with sur
prise, the princess beheld the
wonderfully relieved countenance
of Duke Arturo. A sudden CLEAN
came into her blue eyes. "Ah,
Arturo, it is thou whom l love!
Come. twill teach this toad-kfnp
a lesson"
The king stood in impotent
rage, but as the princess hurried
away with the golden goblet, he
reused. "The goblet-the secret
potion-its action reverseth-
bring back"
But the Princess Carazina was
fleet, and before King Bilbul
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
TT LOOKS Like A CRINIE

to separate a boy from a box Of
Bucklen's Arnica Salve. His pini-
pies. boils, scratches, knocks.
sprains and bruises demand it,
and its quick relief for burns,
scalds, or cuts Is his right. Keep
1t handy for boys, also girls. Heals
everything healable and does 1t
quick. Unequaled for piles. Only
rs cents at Ryner Malstrom Drug
Co.. S3S Pacific avenue.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12

, could reach the palace he was
set upon by the So beautiful, once
loving wives. "Old double-nose!
Thou shrivel-skin! Go have the
surgeon-barber cut off thy ugly
facet"
In a corner of the garden the
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
Prophecy

Joseph interpreted the
dream of seven fat and seven
lean kline.
The meat trust will give
the same explanation for
both," he said.-New York
Sun.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1912-10-12
JOKES
Why, Not Who.

Papa, If you wish to know
who young Mr.. Speaker is, I
can tell you. He's ~
81 don't want to know who
he isl / want to know why
he is!"-Chicago Tribune.