The Washington herald., 1912-07-30
GOT MARRIED., Then
WENT AFTER SHARK
Bridegroom Told How He Used to
Hunt Wild Fish and Disap-
pointed Suitor Called Him.
so HE TRIED ONE IN AQUARIUM

New York, July 2s-with a suit which
had shrunk so that 1t revealed every
angular point of his anatomy, William
Flannery, of Harlem, sheepishly shuffied
up before the magistrate to-day in the
Tombs Court. His face bore the express
sion of a man who wished he was some
where else. Close behind him was Mrs.
Flannery, who had confided to Policeman
Rheingold that she had been a bride
only a few hours.
Attempted suicide" Rheingold ex-
planned to the magistrate, who was won
dering what had brought the inoffensive
looking Flannery before him.
We'll, you see, judge" began the anx-
ious Flannery, I'D Just got married
and
That's no excuse" interrupted the
magistrate.
THAT amt my excuse" declared Flan-
merry, that's my reason"
That's right, judge" interrupted the
bride. Il don't think he'd have done it If
We hadn't just got married, and II II
hadn't been for those friends of his
"A man Just married is likely to do
most anything else that's -rash," assented
the magistrate, but trying to commit
suicide is a new one on me. Go ahead
Used to XIII Sharks.
ITO begin at the beginning" said Elan
merry, taking the court into his confidence,
when a mans goin' with a girl he likes
to have her think he's been everywhere
and done everything. You know how that
is, yourself, Your Honor"
without getting autobiographical.
His Honor admitted, II can imagine how
it's possible
well, anyhow. I told her how I'd been
a sailor and what I'd seen all over the
world She got awfully interested. and
told her how l used to dive overheard and
kill sharks with knife.
There was a bunch of the boys up to
the house when We got married and they
sent a couple of barrels of beer up to the
place and some other stuff. OF course, 1
had to take a smile with all the bunch,
you know how that is, judge, and then
Sadie that's Mrs. Flannery. she goes and
tells them how / used to kill sharks.
was feeling pretty good. you know hoy 1t
is, Judge, and said there wasn't a shark
that 1 couldn't carve to pieces.
Then the boys started TO kid me, and
said / never seen a shark. Well, I said
had and l was willing TO go to the mat
with any shark that ever lived. You know
how II is, judge, when you get bit oiled
up We were going down to Rockaway
Beach for our honeymoon. for I've got to
get back to my truck tomorrow, when
one of the bunch, he says he knows
where there was a shark and bet didn't
dare go up against it.
Would Eat 1t Up.
Il says, Show me your shark and I'll
eat it up and Sadie, she says, You bet
my husband can do it, and the fellow.
he says, I'll show him the shark and
I'll show him up, too You see. this fell
low used to be sweet on Sadie. Well,
there was some argument. you know
how il is, judge. but there was only a
few glasses broken, that's all.
This other fellow. he says, he'll show
me the shark. and We all get on the sub
way and go downtown, and he takes me
to the Aquarium. He shows me a shark
there in one of them big tanks out in the
middle of the floor.
There's your shark, says he. now
show you're not a-bluffin'. you big stiff
Go to it, Kid says Sadie, don't you
let any big stiff show up my husband
so 1 climbed over into the tank. and
then this Dutchman collars me. l didn't
get a chance at that shark at all. And
before l could do anything the shark
goes and bites the heel off one of my
new shoes. 1 didn't get a square deal at
all, judge. II I'd been left alone I'd
a-got that shark"
Yes, and it seems to me-" insisted
Sadie, that them cops could find a lot
more to do than keep a couple of
gcn'Imen from settling little bet. And
he's kept us from having any honey
moon, too"
1T looks more to me like misplaced
confidence than attempted suicide de-
cided the magistrate. but l guess I'll
put you under bonds not to annoy any
sharks for six months. It's a good thing
you've got to get back TO your truck
Flannery, or wed have you
trying to turkey trot with the Statue of
Liberty. Good day"