davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Gradual Spread Of kno~Iedse.

Is this the information editor?-
Yes"
VIII you please tell me Why
straw votes are 90 calledf"
Because srraws shox which way
he wind blows
Then I've lost a pound OF choeo-
ate creams / had an idea that il
vas because they packed them in
sales and sold them
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Comparatively Easy.

AN aviator Is building a machine to
~ across the Atlantic
That has already been done
You mean 20 tell ne that men have
already flown across the Atlantic7"
No. merely that men have already
,uilI machines to do il"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
No Call for ANXIETY

The citizen put the solicited coin
In the hand OF the tramp.
And now | want your assurance"
he said, that this money viii not be
used for any unworthy or unnecessary
purpose"
The tramp drew back
You don't think FIR a minute that
I'd waste it on food an clothes. do
your he Indignantly demanded.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Right fer once

Emily was a quaint. old-fashioned
maiden Of four years. She pronounced
all her words very distinctly. bur &C.
casionally misused them
Especially did the names Of the
meals confuse her. and she would
speak Of lunch in the morning or sup
per at noon with equal impartiality.
One morning little Emily entered
the dining-room and gleefully an
nounced that she was ready for sup.
per.
Her mother impatientiy said:
Now. Emily. this ID ridiculoua You
must learn the names Of the meals.
When you have been asleep Al night,
get up and dress. and come down
stairs. what meal do you have thenr-
Emily solemnly and promptly -
piled:
Oatmeal. mamma--Harper's H.
zaas.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

The Stranger-They tell me the
famous baseball player who won the
automobile lives in this town
The Native-Yep, that's Hank over
there with tn trunk on his shoulder
He runs tn hack between tn hotel
an tn deepo- He traded tn auto
mobile fer it.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Protecting Valuable Interests.

Why do you charge so much extra
for putting in load of coals--
Well replied the dealer, you
know coal is coal. and while it costs
little more. it is better to have any
body that handles it bonded
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
No Wife for Him.

What do l want with a wife,
snorted Bachelor Bockwedder, or
reading an old maids reasons for not
wanting a husband Il have a game
rooster that is vain about his fine
feathers. a goat that chews the rag
an areoplane that gets me up in the
air. and an automobile that keeps N.
all the time broke."-Judge-
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Amusing Dwarf.

movements and show the change from
Q giant TO dwarf. II the performer
Is def. hs can make up attitudes and
Introduce funny speeches whIle he gi-
rates about the room
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Uneonauerable oistrust.

Daily exercise win add ten years
to your life" said the solicitous friend.
@Humph," replied the suspicious
person; Il suppose you are still work
ing in the interests OF the company
in which you persuaded me to insure
my life"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
comIcaI Giant,

keep the folds OF the skirt away from
his face When the person Is inside
he vin look Iike funny giant. and
the attitudes and movements he makes
will please his audience The accom-
penying pictures xIlI give some of the
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
At the Harbers

Your hair is rather thin
Your nose Is mighty red
~E-I mean you ought to use some
thing for your hair"
And you ought to use something
for your breath"
"Er-nice day-er-
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Who's sick at your house7" she
asked
NO one" she replied
But | saw swell automobile
standing out in front yesterday"
Yes, we own IT, That makes some
body sick at your house now. doesn't
it7"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

1T is said that Lord Byron had con-
vulsions when he heard that the first
girl re ever loved was married to
another man"
How proud sac must have been
during the rest OF her life
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
A Ihrsshina Follous.

"Bilfur says he wants his boy to
have PLENTY of red blood"
What does he DO when his boys
red blood leads him 10 smash q win
dowg~
oh, In case ike that Bfifur de-
velops little red blood himself
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

FTiumer-I read in the paper that a
Cleveland brakeman has three wives
Flamson-WeIl. what OF it,
Ffimner-Three wives. man: think
OF IL.
FIamscn-But ron must remember
that coupling Is his regular business
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

To man the most fascinating wo-
man in the world is the one he almost.
but not quite. won.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Nearly every shiftless man has a
horseshoe nailed over his door-that
is, if he has a door.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Help Some.

After all" remarked Mr.. Grovch-
n, -the trusts are OF great benefit to
he public"
In what way"
They give people with family
roubles something to talk about
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Treatment counts.

It does not matter so much about
the breed As 1t does about the kind q
Heatmeat your hens receive
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Annt-Last night before retiring I
looked under the bed a. usual, and
really found man there.
Niece-I Suppose you screamed for
help?
Annt-No, he did
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Nrs- Desrborn-Who II the gentle
nan over In the corner. frovntng 1t
rou, dear?
Nrs. wabash (thrice marrisd)- o.
hats next to my last husband
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Must Be Black.

~She wants a black dog don't
hink this dog viii be black enough
why must she have such a black
log"
She's in mourning for her father
n-law. Didn't you know
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
she Was Anticlpatino.

When he proposed to her she
Knocked him down
Gracious! What did be say to
hatt"
He yelled: Hold on. Hold on.
Ne amt married YETI"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

why do your oxen have binders,
There are no autos or railroads
around here"
Yes, l know. bat there are sum-
ner boarders."
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Saw II.

Saw It
Did you see my painting at the ex-
iibition7"
Il did 1t was the only picture
examined with care"
Splendid, Why was that77
Because nobody else was looking
Il It."
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14
Very cisae-seshle.

Summer Belie-There 20 two Of the
most eisagreeable men I've met this
season
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Summer Beils-oRe OF them stares
ne out OF countenance and the other
won't look AT me al all
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-12-14

Daisy-Is she so economical2
Maisie-WeIl. she's saving her wed
ling dress for a possible second mar
dage.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
ENGLAND TAKES
BACK Challenge
Britishers Decide Not to Come
After Polo Cup But Ameri-
cans Will Invade Britain.

NEW YORK-Conditional polo chal-
lenge sent over by the Duke Of West
Minister for the American trophy has
been withdrawn, il is rumorcd here.
The original idea was for the Earl of
Rocksavagc, two of three Nickels, and
the Duke of Westminster to start for
Egypt on or about Jan. / for prclim-
mary practice. This plan has fallen
through.
While none Of the Polo Association
members will talk officially, 1t is
thought by several of the members
that the birmingham Club will take
up the matter and that another chal-
lenge will be sent here and a team
composed OF at least two of the play
ers who were over last spring will
try conclusions. In the event OF the
English association declining to chal-
lcnge again. the chances are that Har-
ny Payne whitney and the other Mea-
dow Brook players will go to Eng
land and take part in all the prom
incnt tournaments there.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
MAUI notes

Especial Bulletin Correspondence
WAILUKU, Jan. q. A big Sunday
school exhibition took place at the Paia
native church last Sunday morning un
der the supervision of Mcssrs. John
Kaluna and +. n. kahOkuoluna. There
were classes from Huclo, Haiku, Pal
hiihi. Moanaolu Seminary, Spreckels-
vile and Paia. Christian Endeavor eX-
hibitions followed In the afternoon, the
last class finishing at half-past three
o'clock. The recitatiOns and singing
were very beautiful, Mr. Keola of Wa
iluku gave an address to the children.
and more especially to the seminary
students. after the close of the Sunday
school exercises. Mrs. Alice j., Rose
Hill of Honolulu made the principal ad-
dress to the Christian Endeayorers, and
her touching appeals to her people
touched their hearts, as evidenced by
the fire of enthusiasm porvading them
as the speaker babe them adIeu. A
iuau followed.
In the evening at 10 % clock the
members Of the Christian Endeavor So
| cicty of the Kaahumanu church, Wal
luRu, both senior and junior, kept open
house until the dawn Of the New Year,
The speakers were Messrs. James n X
Keola, Captain Zimmerman of the SAL
walton Army, Judge John W. Kalua
and Rev. W. y, Kaumeheiwa, A luau
followed at o'clock at which many
of the members and friends sat down
to enjoy the repast prepared for all
The infant child of DR. and Mrs NJ
Oyama of Waikiki died yesterday. Ths
| bereayed parents have the sympathy OF
[ their friends.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
OLD GUARD
GOING EAST

CHICAGO.--TheO Old Guard is fast
thinning out as regards membership.
Like the grizzled veterans who assem-
Bile once per annum at the encamp-
ments of the Grand Army of the Re-
public, the old-timers who played
baseball In the major league eighteen
years ago and who are now able to
continue in the upper set are few and
far between. Jimmy Callahan. man
ager of the White Sox, lately counted
noses and stopped after enumerating
three, the survivors being himself,
Bobby Wallace, manager of the St
Louis Browns. and Denton Tecumseh
| tOld Cyl Young. who wound up the
season of 1911 with the Boston Ma
tionals. II is a long leap from 1894
to the present time, particularly for
! ball players In the merry whirl Of the
major circuits, but not for the man
who takes care of himself. That's
the argument advanced by each MEM
Der of the trio, YOung's case being
the most noteworthy of the lot by
virtue of the fact that the grand old
man has stacked up near the top of
the pitching column during every
year of his career in the majors.
han, Wallace and Young hope to rem
der yeomen service IN the interests Of
their respective clubs when the big
bell signals the resumption of cham
DiOnSliD fhOstilitipS next ADril, Gala
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
BOY SCOUTS TO
ELECT OFFICERS

The work of recognizing the Boy
Scouts will be continued tonight at
the first regular meeting of the local
council of the Hawaiian Boy Scouts Of
America. at the Waikiki home Of
James A. Wilder. the head of the
movement here. Mr.. Wilder will talk
on hoy scout matters to those as
sembled and officers will be elected
for the ensuing year, AS well as con-
stitution and bylaws chosen. The
following have been named as mem
bers of the Scout Council aud are
urged to be present: Robert Ander-
son, George Angus, Emil Berndt, G. X.
Carter. Admiral Cowles, W. +. Dilling-
ham. Judge Dole, Rev. j. T, Erdman,
II, r. Hitchcock, c. II. Hemenway,
Brother Henry. A. +, Judd. DR.. Hobby.
S. NJ. Kamaiopili, General Macomb. G.
C. Potter, Paul Super, Alex. Lindsay,
Jr., II. NJ. Won Holt, u. Won Damn,
Judge whitney, and J, A. Wilder.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
THE OLD SPORTS KICK

The ring aint what it used to be;
The grand old fstic game
Has had its day aud gone its way,
Twill never be the same.
No more the Harlem Spider SHES
His castor in the ring,
No more the Jersey Chicken lands
Ills vicious jab and swing;
The Cyclone and the Thunderbolt
Have gone their various ways.
The Slashcr and the Lanky Shad
Are things of other days ar.r. . p
No more with Iusty lead and cross
The goodly claret draw.
But armed with 5-ounce pillows now,
They pirouette and pose, .
And put on pretty postures for
The moving picture shows. 20.
They PM down purses that would pay
The ransom OF king
And pull off parlor matches In
A pretty padded ring.
They fiddle, sidestep, duck and sprint,
They spar and block and hug,
Where blowsy of other days
Would stand their ground and slug.
But worse Of all the ills that blight
The king of manly games,
They even 20 and rob II of
The old timc-honOred names.
No more we hear of Jem or Jock,
OF Paddy, Ted or Spike,
Ye gods we read of Willie now
And Freddie and the like.
look for Champeenr Reginald
Aforc the winters through
Great ghost of ol'Bill Spartacus!
What are we comm to?
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

mis- matches for the Davis Gun, played
New Years Day and the day following
in New Zealand, are contained In the
Coast papers which arrived this morn
American team, which left here with
such high hopes of lifting the cup. suf-
Tcrcd "A worse defeat even than the
brief cable reports published here
stated
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
KAN SPEED BURNERS
GETTING READY FOR
CROSS COUNTRY RACE
About Thirty Expected to Get
Off the Mark in First
Event of Series,

Out M Kamehameha the main ath-
letic event of the week will be the
cross-country run, which Ia to take
place Friday afternoon at 4 o'clock.
Up to date all the fast men are en-
tered. including r. kalani, a dark
horse who did not run in the last race.
There Is much interest In the out
come of the race this time, as many
of the students believe that G.. Benja-
min. who has proven to be the best
long distance man at the school. will
not win the coming event. He will
have a stiff trio to run against in j.
Amos, Jones and +. Kalani. The first
named gave Benjamin "A run for his
money in the last race, j. Jones taxi
ing third place. X. Muller and j. Ka-
nihana are two new men entered for
the coming race. and by Friday the
entry list should number about thirty.
All the men who have entered are
doing some preliminary work.
The three place runners Of the COM
ing event will be barred from partici-
pating in the second race over the
same course. to take place Jan. ~.
Three such runs are planned and then
q final event for the first nine, The
first five crossing the line In the main
event will represent the school in a
cross-country race against team
from Punahou,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
APPLY THIS TO MOSQUITOES.

Ten little flies
All in a line; ... O..
One got swat
Then there we're -
Nine little flies
Grimbly sedate,
Licking their chops
Swat! There were 'F'+f1"'
Eight little flies,
Raising some more
Swat, Swat, Swat! Swat,
Then there we're F""'
Four little flies
Colored green-blue:
Swat! (Ain't II easy
Then there were -
Two little flies
Dodged the civilian
Early next day
There were million. .
Buffalo News.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
GETS SPLENDID MOVING
PICTURES OF CRATER

r. X. BONNIE, the moving picture
man. has taken what are expected to
be the most remarkable photographs
of the volcano Kilauea ever secured.
Eight hundred feet of film was taken
and not only the volcano but the sur
rounding country was covered. Before
long Mr. BONNIE will announce an cx-
hibition when his latest achievements
In moving picture photography can be
properly seen and Appreciated ...
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
GOSSIP OF GOLF
u u Il

No,binr nrohablv could illustrate the
d,oororc. ho,v.on the average good
n,,vsr and tho master gu eusctuo,,y AS
IN. incident which occurred in the .x-
hibi,ior match ,t Nusveu mir the 9th
or yoek SAYS the World of Golf. Harry
yordon tool, o sbots at one hole. The
ro,,s yos aosbod all over tho country.
and 4, may tru,bfulIy be said that
HARRY, yardon,s q bocam, a nina dnys'
,,opdor I'm, norhans IN. most re-
markabI. thing abo,,t the occurrence
was that /, cou,d he so rare as to give
4, thc Importanco Of ono of the most
note,vorthy events in the history of a
ycor's golf II WAS "a wears since Var
bnr Ind ,nl,en q for "A single boi,. Dur
ing that time he had PLAYED hundreds
of rounds and thousands of holes. II
was not however until he went 10
NusweIl hin that he lapscd sufficiently
10 get within one stroke of double f,g
ures The fact is sufficient to nII even
the hest of MS. with "A deem humility.
Drove Too Far,
ON tho eleventh tecing ground he was
advised to tokc "A brassIe lest he should
drive into tho bunker ordinarily meant
IN catch 4, tanned second Even with
| IN. brassio he was framed. and with
| his recovery he went into a grassy
Ihunker hoyond the green. His bah was
I'm a doom crack and he claimed thht
he couId lift II without penalty and
dron II I'm the hazard under a local rule
that n ball couId be lifted from cracks
I'm the ground The point was decided
against him. and he dropped behind
the hazard under penalty of one stroke
\ From there he again went into the
crack from which he had Just lifted
and had To lift and lose n second time
PLAYING his sixth shot he was short
with the result that a o was registered
SO far as Vardon could recollect, he
, had not had so high q figure since thc
/ Musselburgh tournament of 1898, when
\ he took "A Q at "A short hole. Neverthe-
! less he won that competition.
I Bad Cards Interesting.
| II would he interesting to know tn,
record number of strokes taken for any
one hole We are constantly hearing
of people who have the felicity of hol'
, ing out with their tee shot, but a dis,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
AMERICAS Tennis DEFEAT
Even WORSE Than INDICATED
Larned Easy Victim For Rod Health Considered Weakest Of
Australian Team--Wrght Plays In the Singles Instead
of MClOlIuhn.

sess greater stamina than their com
rade and on that account he should
have been given the lighter work.
The greatest blow to American ten
mis- experts comes In the news of the
defeat of w. A. Larned, the American
national champion, by r. w. Heath of
Melbourne. I.arned has been looked on
as nearly invincibIe. while Heath. in a
long season Of tournament play this
wear i'm England, never even reached
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
Bulletins Page of Sports
RANDOM SNAPSHOTS AT
THE SPORTING
TARGET

Since Paddy Livingstone Joined
Cleveland he Is predicting the pennant
for the Maps lilo is the pcnnant kid
When Paddy played with Wheeling II
COPIED the flag lie then went TO In
dianapolis. and N" American Associ-
alton club won the hunting Philadel-
phia was his next step and he still was
with n pcnnant winner. Now he ls go-
ing TO keep up his good work with
Cleveland.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

c. G. Livingston, as administrator
of the estate of Clifford Il. Livingston.
filed his accounts and they were APP
proved by Judge Whitney The Judge
also approved the accounts of Bar
burp Tcllos, ms administrator of the
estate OF the late Antonio Tclles.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
BAND CONCERT.

The Hawaiian band will give n public
concert this evening at 1880 at Thomas
square The program follows:
MarCh--Spirit. of Liberty ..... Sousa
Ovorturc--COmedy .............. Bella
March Man Behind the Gun. Sousa
Traviata ........ Verdi
Nocal-l Hawaiian Songs, Ar, by Berger
-Pinaforc (by rcuuesD.,.
......,,....,...,.. Sullivan
waltz The Source ...... Waldtcufcl
Polka-Red and Black ........ Cooke
The star SpanGled Banner.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09
Persian
Nerve Essence

These wonderful little tablets contain n,
mercury or other injurious drug. They act
like magic, The bright eye, the elastic stcr.
the clear and active brain, the courage and
strength and comfort they impart are noted
almost from the first day they are taken,
One box of Persian Nerve Essence
will do a great deal of good, the full
course treatment OF six boxes are guar
antecd to make a permanent cure or the
money will bC refunded,
The proprictorB, The Brown Export Co..
1897 Liberty ST., New York, n. u, u, =, A.,
earnestly asks every sufferer 20 give Persian
Nerve Essence . good far friI! az fhSiT nSk
Don't delay commence to-day, tne preparation
san be obtained from
,,,,,n,.S nnrr rnMp,xv
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

Persia is the latest country to be
heard from re white Hopes. according
to an exchange. Kilich- Boy Is the name
of the aspiring punch trader, and he Is
said to be the biggest thing outside
museum. Looks. though. as II II would
he a cas-" uf Persian Lamb led TO the
slaughter, If he eyer rot inside the
ropes with John Arthur Johnson.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

Wanted; Fifty more decorated
autos for the Floral Parade. Get In
line for the biggest carnival Of all.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

The Cleveland pitching stan Is a case
Of young bloods for fare you well
The oldest man on the stan In point Of
been with the Maps for two years Cy
Falkcnbcrg. recently turned over to
Toledo. was the veteran Of the stan.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

After q suspension Of i've years In
athletic relations. Waseda aud Keio
universities have decided never To play
each other again How long would IL
have taken these deliberate japanese
gentlemen to put M the bars II they
had had real quarrel?
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

II has been announced that Fielding
II. Yost will coach the University of
Michigan football squad in 1912 and
1913 There had been some doubt as
to whether Yost would be able to leave
his business and return to Michigan
next fall.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

There were sixteen entries In this
when II started and the
elimination has gone on until but two
are left to fight II out in the finals"
says local paper Marvel ous!
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

with the kidney punch barred and
kicking and biting taboocd. boxing may
ultimately become respectable In dear
old Lunnon.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

There can not possibly be anything
Sensational hereafter In college sports
now that wrestling has busted in
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

The infant child Of DR. and Mrs. NJ,
Oyama of Waikiki died yesterday, The
bereayed parents have the sympathy of
their. friends.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1912-01-09

Kid Mccoy Is undisputed champion
In the bankruptcy courts.