Evening journal., 1912-09-21
ADRY GOODS
COURTSHIP
By M. oUAD
Copyright. 1912. by Associated Lit
eTary Press

hVNu AuN uAhhg Vhg Tue price OF {
cents a yard. She was inspecting pat
terms when Uncle snas FrlsbIe came
IN When they had greeted each other
she turned her back to the calico and
said:
Uncle silas, you know have had
three husbands"
Il know it's three or four OF Eve or
along there somewhere. Pears to mo
you spend most Of your time getting
married and burying husbands"
"Sias," sh0 says In tones OF confi-
dence. I've made mistakes IN my three
marriages. and / don't want to make
one in my fourth don't admit that
there'l be a fourth. but II l should
happen to decide TO marry ag'in don't
want to be taken in. How Is a widder
woman to judge a manT
well. now. II was thinking OF mar
rying ag'in. which l hain't, as I've got
en- old woman and Eve young uns, I'D
FIRST hunt around for a soft pine shingle.
Then I'd sharpen up my jackknife and
sit down by my lonesome in some place
where no burned dos or calf was likely
10 come roofing around. and then I'd
whlttle and think and think and whit
tie. Mebbe I'd whittle and think for a
whole week. but when | got through
I'd know that was correct"
But | can't whittIe."
mo. but you can knit, and that's Just
as good. Who is tho feller who Is
sparkling you this timer
ITS q man named Lemuel Johnston.
and he's about dfty years old"
And what have you made up your
mind about himT
u haven't ma de II up at ell. That's
what I'm asking your advice for"
Il see. Well, III do the best l can.
II was a wilder woman and a man
come along and appeared to have de-
signs agin me I'd get out my knitting
and watch him as be talked. and I'd
remember certain things--to wit,
namely;
"a man who sits cross legged most
OF the time is purity certain TO be lazy
"A man who stands around with bis
hands In his pockets will kick like a
steer II dinner isn't ready on the mint
THE man who comes courting and
rings In poetry Is going 20 raise a row
after marriage n his wife don't ike fat
pork
"rhe man who Is narrow between
the eyes and carries a sharp nose has
widder's possessions figured to
cent.
'"rhe man who sighs and shakes his
head 10 a mournful way and wishes he
could DO more for the heather in AZ
rica IS going 70 keep nightly close tab
on your pin money after marriage.
"A freckled face man Is generally a
contented man. but whether contented
with his lot or to let his wife build
the dre in the morning is a thing you
have got 20 tlnd out later on.
''There are men who come courtine
who are soft spoken and move about
Ike cat. After marriage they VIII
yell at the oxen 50 as to be heard Q
mile away.
"The boisterous man is ant 20 bo
hearty and good uatured. but he win
wnke the baby up every time he comes
into the house and let all the family
quarrels be known all over the neigh
borhood
~ man who sits and rubs his hands
and smiles and uses precise language is
thinking how much tea and coffee he
viii allow you to measure out for a
drawing after marriage
"a scow between a mans eyes
means concentration Of thought. but
the trouble Is that you don't know
what he has concentrated on. II may
be love. and II may be speculation.
"A wIdder woman IN sizing up a
feller who has come sparkling should
take good look at his month. II II
is unusually wide his talk will never
go much beyond cabbaGcs. but II It's a
woman's mouth he'll he a good hand
at saying cutting things. II It droops
At the corners he considers himself a
sort OF a martyr and M used by the
world. and whenever the bread is
heavy or the potatoes not quite done
he's going to break ont
Then there's one moro sort OF man.
He's the chap that boldly knocks on
the door and stalks I'm when it's open.
ed and says:
"'Are you the Wilder wsrnerg
al am says you
-'Had three husbands. under
standT
"T have
"'well. IT'S time you took the fourth.
and I'm here to oil the bill. am
what am and am worth about $1,000
all told. I've got to drive along to the
blaclssmith's shop to get my wheel
ixed. and I'll stop for your answer
when ! come hack '"
"And does ho stopT" asked Aunt
Sally.
"He does"
"And does the wldder consentT'
after knitting and thinking fer an
hour or So"
"And-and II is a happy marrisgeT
''rhe chances are even up. and YOU
haven't fooled away any time over the
matter"
Aunt Sally turned 90 a piece OF cali
co and wet II with her month 10 see
n II was a fast color and then backed
up to the counter to giggle and say:
Thanks. Uncle Sile reckon III
20 home and wait for that feller to
come alongr'
MECHANICS TO HEAR GOSPEL.