davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Don't make light of the man who
wears whiskers-admire his courage.
4 X
The man who starts fires in the
cold winter mornings when he starts
married life starts trouble.
r = 4
AS a general rule, the average child
will rule unless the rule is applied.
Even if you are burning your can
die at both ends-don't make light
of it.
Don't burn your bridges behind
you" also applies to the custom of Civ
ing away baby buggies.
n
Do not complain of the man who is
stingy-he is his own enemy.
= \
The three 'fs" have much to do
with a girls beauty-feet, form and
feature.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

IFrom the New York Press.]
Nothing tastes so sweet to man as
a girls blush.
The baby has got to look like any
rich relative the family has.
A mother of a large family has so
much patience with it because the
father hasn't any.
A woman is very clever to be able
to learn from a man what she knows
so much better than he does.
Where woman can sometimes
make money is by her husband never
spending any of his own on himself
It is a popular belief among chorus
girls that if you give bald headed man
a good show he is bound to get to the
front
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
FROM OTHER PENS
EARLY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING.


Although the father of the family is
usually none too anxious to remember
Christmas until the fact is forced upon
him, the ladies are more farSeeing and
take into consideration the fact that
Christmas is coming well ahead of that
important date. Since "Pater familfas'
has to come across sooner or later any
how, the ladies might as well make
their demands early and commence
their Christmas shopping as well ahead
of the final rush as possible. The ire
mendous crush in the retail section
week or two before Christmas is always
a heavy drain both on the Christmas
shoppers and the working forces OF the
great retail establishments. However
exciting the presence of the crowd with
it's attendant rush may be, shopping
under such circumstances is neither so
satisfactory nor profitable as would be
the case were the great mass of people
to commence their purchases earlier.
Those who make their Christmas pur-
chases early and well in advance Of the
final rush secure the best bargains as
well as the pick of the holiday novelties.
However enjoyable the rush and crowd
ing just before Christmas may be to
the merry throng of Christmas shop
pers, the experience is frightful drain
on the strength and nerves of the
clerks and saleswomen who are COM
PEELED to cater to the tastes and whims
of the unreasonable throngs, all of
Whoih ueSITe 10 DS WeAtSu Oil at OHCe-
There will always be many who by
sheer force of circumstances will be
compelled to wait until the last minute to
do their Christmas shopping, but there
is also very large contingent who can
make their purchases as well now as
later. 1t is true that the head of the
family may demur at being compelled
to produce" somewhat ahead of the
usual time, but a little persuasion will
probably convince him that it will make
little difference whether he opens his
pocketbook month in advance or later
Moreover, by extending the shopping
over a longer period of time 1t may be
possible to make the drafts on the
paternal pocketbook a little larger, as
installment payments do not hurt as
much as lump sum.-New Orleans
Picayune
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

from the Chicago News.1
The strenuous minister dispenses re-
ligion by the pound.
It is folly to offer a wise man a penny
for his thoughts.
A woman who talks like book isn't
so easily shut up.
The saloonkeeper always has plenty
of fall goods on hand.
One sure way to lose your friends is
to become a chronic kicker.
A statesman Is a politician who can
say nothing at the right time.
Go to the gas meter. thou student
and learn to be a lightning calculator.
When any one says to a wise man.
isn't that the best way?" he always
says YES"
The weather is never too hot or too
cold to discourage the man with a sub
scription paper.
A man who is always complimenting
a woman is an awful liar, and she
knows it. Still, she believes him.
When a woman finds herself the head
of the house the first thing she docs
is to invest in a new hat for the head
Probably there is method in a law
mans madness. He may not care IN
take chances of injuring his health bv
working between meals.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
AYHAWKER JOTS

Russell Springs is not fearing a coal
shortage this winter. The Leader:
The town has plenty of coal now, there
was a car on the track Tuesday.
Speaking of the Turkey Trot, the
Bulgarians, the Servians, the Greeks
and Montenegrins are making Tur-
key trot over Europe, comments the
Scott City Republican
They are letting their whiskers grow
long at Sharon Springs. Says the
Western Times: The boys over at the
barber shop here in Sharon Springs
have chosen up sides and have been
playing checkers.
A side-swipe at actresses by the
Fnglewood Leader-Tribune: The
census bureau reports that there are
1O6 men in the United States for
every 100 women, which would give
every girl a husband if it were not for
the widows and actresses.
This good story is credited by the
Marquette Tribune to an Exchange;
A certain lady called up her grocer
by telephone the other morning, and
after she had sufficiently scolded the
man who responded said, And what
more the next order you get from me
will be the last I'll ever give you" 1t
probably will, madam said the voice
at the other end of the wire, you are
talking to the undertaken.
When went to church last Sunday
evening, and felt everyone looking at
me. several thoughts were in my
mind, writes the Belfry Hill CORE
spondent in the Council Grove Guard.
At first I thought I must be getting
self conscious, or else my necktie was
thing as a newspaper man causing ex-
element by going to church. Never
theless, / expect to go again next sun
day, but to some other church.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

sisting of per cent of ether and 50
per cent of normal salt solution, which
is injected into the veins before the
operation. The solution has been
found to be a valuable anesthetic in
the London hospitals, where 1T was
first employed. The profession here
is inclined to think that it will prove
to be of great value.
About quart of the solution is in
/ jected into small vein in the arm or
a patient. He falls to sleep easily and
peacefully. The administration OF
ether in this form is not accompanied
by any of the disturbing effects which
often occur when the patient is oblig-
ed to inhale the vapors of the drug
from a funnel placed over the mouth.
+, The respiratory organs are not in any
way affected.
The solution also takes the place of
blood which is lost in the operation,
and minimizes the shock to the nerves
which in some persons may prove
serious matter. 1t is believed that the
English method is less of a strain on
the heart than are other means of
administering ether.
Operations in which the solution
has been used have been performed
in the last few days at the Flower
hospital, at Avenue A and SiXtyt third
street, and the patients are doing well.
Surgeons at the Metropolitan Hos
pital in Blackwells Island, witnessed
an operation recently. The patient
was a negro woman who was being
treated for appendicitis. She went to
sleep easily under the spell of the So
luton.
How do you feel?" she was asked
when she regained consciousness.
''Lor' bles you," answered she. Il
sure is hungry"
She ate what food was provided her
her with relish, and she seemed to
have suffered practically no shock
from the operation. Ordinarily pa
tients are sick from the effects of eth
er for several days.
The administration of anesthetics
has been greatly improved within the
last two or three years. The admins
tration of ether with orange in vapor
form has been attended with excellent
results, and patients who have been
operated upon under those conditions
have found after effects counteracted.
The medical profession here is
much interested in the ether solution
method, and while enough cases have
not come under observation to come
to definite conclusions, physicians be-
lieve that it is destined to be an i'm
portant aid to surgery.-New York
Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

work."
Hate it except when 1 think of you,
and then I love itP'
Wen. Pa said he would like to take
that lease off your hands. He tried
10 get 1t before, but you beat him to
But you
Il believe I would like to try the
city for little while, anyway. Besides,
Belle Wilson wants to finish my school
Tor me- She needs the money badly.
II guess I'm doing the tagging now
sne began, but he smothered the words
as ne caught her close to him.
DID any farmer ever have such a
glorious harvestr he murmured.-
copyright, 1912 by McClure's News
paper Syndicate)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
GLOBE SIGHTS
eY THE ATCTIIsoT GLOBE

Don't jeopardize friendship with
senseless arguments.
How the Lord does hate, and the
Devil does love, a gutter!
There are a number of better ways
of being patriotic than waving the flag.
Next to the roustabouts, the polar
bear in the menagerie has the hardest
part of the circus life.
There are so many unsatisfactory
janitors, one suspects that may explain
why they are janitors.
A suffragist's husband hasn't gone
the limit in the henpeck class until
he has to attend that kind of meet
ings.
Graduates of the barber college should
be given the credit for not Dragging
about their dear old alma mater
A believer in the eight-hour shift quit
the farm because he was expected to
work two of them in succession
One would not live always; to stick
around till honesty In politics became
the general rule, would be long enough.
Probably you think you can't argue
with the scrub who spouts statistics
like an adding machine. But that
shouldn't be counted a disadvantage.
A speaker can get by with many
mixed metaphors, split infinitives and
other English atrocities, If his career
previously has been devoted to some
thing besides talk.
'''I never worked so hard for any
one else as for a man who boosted he
didn't expect his employees to work any
harder than he did. The fact was, they
cOuldn' t."-Rufe Hoskins
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
HIS PRnpHEm

The country's going to the dogs,
Up goes the cost of living,
Not one OF us can even buy
A turkey for Thanksgiving.
Wen have to leave the butter off
And eat our bread without it,
And learn to dress in oyeralls
And tow while we're about it.
Wen go broke, the banks will burst,
There's bound to be panic;
The Nation Will be ruined by
Calamities titanic
The crops will fail, the people starve,
And graft so undetected.
Who am L? Why, I am the man
Who did not get elected.
-Minna Irving, in New York Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
ARE WIVES LAzY2

The women of Topeka and Kansas
are reading again the statement of
the department of agriculture to the
effect that keeping house is lost art
among the housewives of this country
! today. 1t is a severe jolt to their
| pride-this claim that the women of
the United States are becoming lazy,
that they are slaves to the lure of So
ciety.
And right here is one of the secrets
of the high cost of living in this coun-
try. The higher standard of existence.
the modern ideas on the purchase of
food stuffs, the attractive prepara-
| lions that have cut down the work in
the kitchen, and the sense of pride
| that has affected the working girls,
and the hired help" have combined
to make living and luxury a common
expense.
1t isn't fair, however, to say that
the average woman of today is lazy.
The latest production of the builders
art in providing accommodations in
the kitchen, the workshop of the
home, has reduced housewife drudgery
in this corner of the house, it is true.
The distributors of food have placed
on the market articles that are ready
for the table after a few minutes on
the stove and a restful period in the
fireless cooker. This is admitted. The
raising of children has dwindled down
to a scientific basis-so much of this,
so much of that, a scheduled nap and
a liberal dose of fresh air-and the
babies have grown into school age.
But there is another resort in the
modern home that tells a different
story-the study. The cities, towns
and villages are alive with women's
clubs-historical research societies,
foreign subject findings, the study of
literature, art, psychology, the easier
sciences and history. Women are in
the learning period. They have taken
advantage of the mechanical and
scientific household duties-the Win
ners Of time-and have applied their
minds and their brains instead of their |
hands, and elbows and knees
The Agricultural Department says
that women are not boasttng OF their
preserves, their pickles, their berries
and their canned fruits, jelly and Jam.
Women do not have to resort to TINS
hot summer day labor in order to
place fruits on the dinner table. In
the first place the shelves at the cor
her grocery are filed with cans
and jars and glasses. In the second
place, the cold storage advantages
hold over the summer supply OIL
fruits and the housewife can serve
them at all times of the year--right
from the tree, so to. speak Former
" it was necessary to preserve ana
'scan" fruits in order to keep them.
However, let the Agricultural De-
partment have its way-granted that
the women do not have the worries
Of freezing and popping fruit jars IN
the winter-granted that they nave
allowed the shortening of long hours
in the kitchen and over the washtub
we leave it to you-which woman Is
he better equipped for a happy con-
.ented household-the woman with
nome made apple butter and jam. or
he woman with a general satisfying
knowledge of what the world and its
people are doing? l.
You prefer the latter? We thought
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
DAFFYDHS
BY q. NoALL.

If two choir members became ac-
quainted by singing together would you
say met by chants?
Crank Chance, you may be a good
ball player, but you can't hit fly
copS.)
If a prize bull dog was attacked by
a toy-poodle, would the prize fight?
(Siow music, professor Kid Do-Ray-
Me is hanging on the cords-)
If the Kansas University football
team caught fire. would Washburn2
(Can out the fire department, fell
ers, let's put him out.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
HUNOR or TIE DAY

Gabe-what was the original pay-as-
you-enter car? Steve-The Roosevelt
band wagon.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Il presume you never quarrel with your
wife?" Certainly notp' replied skinny
little Mr.. Hennypeck. ct am merely a
husband, not a lion tamer."-Judge.
''They talk of introducing a voting ma
chine for use in future city elections" "a
voting machine? What's the matter with
Tammany Hall?'-Life.
Mrs. Crawford-The janitor got angry
when told him the apartment was cold
Crawford-I hope he was angry enough
to answer with some heat.-Judge.
Jack and I have parted forever"
Good gracious! What does that mean?''
Means that I'll get a five-pound box of
candy in about an hour. "-LouisvaTlA
Courier-Journal
Max. a primary student, was given in
the word Chicken" Not being quite
sure of the way to spell the word, he
wrote the following: "a jiken is a small
hen Il can spell hen)."-Woman's Home
Companion.
charm that soothes the savage. The
Swain Gust kicked out)-Why don't you
play more for your father?-Kansas city
Star.
Modern Proverb.-Forget thine enemies,
yea, even those that yelp beside thy
pathway but do thou daily remember thy
friends So shalt thou live and die happy
-Meditations of jeremiah Of Jappa, in De-
troit Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
Find a New Anesthetic.

Good cheer and hearty hunger wait
on patients who come out from under
the influence of a new form of an
esthetic which is being introduced in
this country.
Those who undergo operations US
ually emerge from Inconsistencies
nauseated. and it takes several days
before they have recovered from the
effects of the ether on the system
1t was learned that surgeons in sew
eral of the hospitals of this city have
employed with success a mixture con-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
by THE WY
BIZ HARVEY PARsocsa

/
Outside of vaudeville and comic
pages, the per cent of funny DRINKS
is remarkably low.
Late reports would indicate that
Willum Alum White had been elected
by an overwhelming majority to the
office of Goat
Mayhap Willum thought, when he is
sued his instructions to election Off
Gals that the other barrel was loaded.
Musical note: Dodd CASTOR is re-
quested to refrain from using the word
"waddle" for at least ten days.
A country EDITORS idea of a strong,
convincing editorial, is one that is
prlnte on the front page.
AS we understand it. John schrank
pleads guilty to shooting Col. Roose
welt. Schrank is a mutt in other mat
terS, but he chose a method of gain
ing a little distinction over other crimI-
nails, who usually stand trial and es-
cape on a technicality.
a soccer football game, according
to our expert, is a disturbance wherein
mIstaking an opponents knee cap for
the ball scores two points.
~ I'll z SOAllLlllSSIOil00 Dy f1On JOuH
Cooper to state that he is trying to
paint MS perch, but will not lay away
his paint brush until a committee OF
representative citizens, headed by Dodd
CASTOR, can find it convenient to CEN
scr the job. He strives to please, and
If they do not like the barber pole
erect of his present effort, he will try
again. However, says Hon Cooper, the
committee should not expect a very
smooth job, as the lumber in his porch
bears evidence of having been planed
with lawn mower.
II would be pleasant job to write
the obituary of the last fly of the sea-
son, but some people take such good
care of their flies that a few speci-
mems of the mustica domestica remain
on the job all winter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

The bank clearings over the coun-
try for the month of October were
the greatest on record. The main rea-
son was because last summer every
now and then a little rain cloud ap-
peared on the western horizon of the
agricultural section in the west. And
Kansas contributed a big share of the
prOsperitv
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

This 1ong-distance-citizens sys-
tenn of voting away from home in Kan
sas is another method of delaying the
returns. Kansas should be anxious to
adopt the voting machine when the
proposition is presented to the next
legislature. Certainly. here is a brand
of machine politics. that will be fav-
CRADLE to Bull Moosers, Republicans,
Democrats and all
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

New York newspapers should refrain
from their post-mortem remarks about
the Colonel. And they should be care
ful about the way they pay their re-
epects to local talent. too. For instance.
read this from the New York Tribune:
BY the way. how many of the Coloners
Seven Little Governors made good'?'
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

This country has a queer thirst foy
theatrical titles. Here are a few Sc
lected out Of an entire page of an
nouncements in a Sunday newspaper:
what Ais Your, '"The Red Petit
coat, "Hanky Panky'', "Oh, Oh, Del
phine". Ready Money, Never Say
DIE, and 1.-THE Yellow Jacket"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

The Bull Moose papers in Kansas
are soothing their readers with the
messages that 'Progressiveness Will
March Onward" Republican papers
are shaking their wise old headlines
and whispering "I told you So" And
the Democratic papers-well, all the
old ROSTERS that were piled away I'M
der the cases have been busted and
washed and placed into service again.
Truly, this is an optimistic state.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

1t is evident from the reports that
several thousand ballots were thrown
out in Kansas-and all because the
election judges and supervisors paid
more attention to the instructions
from the Bull Moose headquarters in
the newspapers, than the law sent out
by Attorney General Dawson.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Officials of Kansas cities are still
holding Indignation meetings at Kan
sas gatherings to complain of
the gas shortage. Here's hoping that
the resolutions they pass will have
more effect than the average results
of public demonstrations concerning
COMBINATIONS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Denver news writers declare that the
influence of the women at the polls
election day defeated prohibition in
Colorado. Photographs of women with
anti-prohibition badges We're printed.
Woman suffrage works both ways.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
Topeka has endured a season of In

Topeka has endured a season of in
cendiary fires. An incendiary fire,
owing to the difficulty of procuring
evidence, and the backwardness of the
insurance companies is one of the real
obstacles for fire officials to overcome.
Very few prosecutions are successful.
thorough investigation should be
Ne in Topeka. The Merchants
Yer loss Tuesday morning is only
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

According to statistics there are 49, 900
feeble-minded children in New York city
After all, it is not a question of how
many children in a fami1y-it is a ques-
ton of how good. Another illustration
of quantity instead of quality
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

WHO is governor " has been the
daily greeting on the street car and
in the office. Until the state senate
decides the question this winter. in all
proba ability, the question will remain
unanswered.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

A New York florist is suing Mayor
Fitzgerald of Boston for $4,000 for
flowers. So that is where the bou-
Quets the mayor has been handing
himself came from.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Many men have charged, undis-
mayed, up to the lannon's mouth.
But where is the spellbinder brave
enough to try to repeat now the
speeches he made during the cam
paign2
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

A New York paper advises its reader
to start a pearl farm. Still, seed pearls
are expensive
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
ment.

one of the fires under suspicion by
Chief Wilmarth of the fire depart
ment
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

The State Journal 10 q member OF the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
ganfxAticn for the exclusive afternoon
publication IN Topeka
The news Is received In The State Jour
nal building over wires tor this sole pur-
D0e0-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

The Temple of Peace at The Hague
should stand. 1t may become usefu
some day.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

The moth ball is about due for it's an
nual outing
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Mayhap Willum thought, when he is
sued his instructions to election off,
Gals that the other barrel was loaded.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.

FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Late reports would indicate that
Willum Alum White had been elected
by an overwhelming majority to the
office of Goat.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-11-13

Outside of vaudeville and comic
pages, the per cent of funny DRINKS
is remarkably low.