Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1912-04-11

- 6O AA0S NN0V SuNE NS0sNA ~
:o,ded up and mailed back home in
regulation envelopes.
An archduke has given up his title
M order to marry a poor girl. He must
be an imposter and not II real arch
duke at all.
Speaking of the man higher up"
MI. Morgan's new office is to- be on the
Soth moor Of a skysctaper.
An eastern paper notifies the public
that Mr.. Sherman is still vice presi-
dent. Yes, indeed. Very still.
A noted Fr~enchwotnan in New York
says poets and actors are the only men
VINO really live. Some OF them will be
surprised to Know this.
t,aptain Piazza is in command OF the
Italian feet of aeroplanes. The cap
tain sound more like a front porch
tina an aviator.
~ Mi. Taft can only send his cabinet
away ON a long trip around tho world
during 1912 he may win the election.
Hu Is Champ Clark "A light. welter
or heavyweight champ?
n-eticut who is living on Is cents a
week. Well. a whole lot of magazine
poets are doing that and are not bragg
sing about 1t. either.
a western man was arrested for sob
iIng too loudly at "a funeral. This
could be easily prevented by leaving
SUCH persons out OF the will.
Sir William Gilbert, the humorist,
left an estate valued at $3.50, 900, but
that would Indicate that he did not
spend all his time Enthusiastically
While there have been 1000, 900 pat
tnts issued In this most of
hem, apparently, are for %aeroplanes
and mOuSetraps.
A Virginia court has decided that a
poker chip is real money. This will
also be true of the Saratoga chip if po-
tatOes continue to rise in price.
A physician states that larpe bofa
are Injurious to the health If women.
Ana, he might add, to the bank account
of men.
baltimore declares that no extortion
VIII be allowed there during the demo-
cratic national convention. but a few
campaign promises will probably be ex-
torted from the nominee. at that.
a California woman .has
married a blushing young man of 81.
california has evidently gone suffraset
And. by the way. the Custom Cut
ifrs' association meeting i'm New York
will In no way try to reduce the tariff
demanded by Collector Loeb.
The government has issued a bulle-
ton on Tick Eradication Thos who
have been buying goods on tick will be
disappointed to hear this.
Fat men are going out of style. but
most of them will be surprised to know
that they were even in.
Eggs are only s cents a dozen in
china, but, then. China isn't n full
tiedged republic yet.
IL has been discovered that sauer-
kraut promises longevity, but il there
is nothing in the future. but to keep on
'eating sauerkraut what is the use of
the longevity?
Senator Hepburn says bills should
not be railroaded through the Senate.
but there are some railroad magnates
VINO will not agree with him.
out in Kansas, Capt. Hobson re-
saeived one vote for president. There
Kansas.
General Garibaldi is coming from
Europe to a of the Mexi-
can federal army, but the federal army
may be a revolutionary army before he
arrives.
The congressman have been asked so
often where they stand that most of
them are sitting down.
A New York man proposes a law to
have all holidays fall on Monday. Sort
of a blue law, as 1t were.
La Toilette says he has taken no rest
for ~ years. The public seems dis
posed to let him take m now.
Bryan is raising onions. He is also
quite a hand at raising something else.
Coin Harvey, the eminent free sill
vs.rite. has mentioned W. j. Bryan for
vice president. Man, inhumanity to
man makes countless thousands weep.
Unfortunately for the Chinese princes
who are being thrown out of their jobs
they stand little chance of marrying
American heiresseS.
Ten pairs of rOusers have been stol-
'-n from Rev. DR.. Aked. If that keeps
up he will ave to put an IN" o the
front end Of his name.
THE CITY.
1'm not dead in love with the city; its
rumble. its tumble and oar
Its atmosphere sooty and gritty makes
living naught less than a chore.
The crowd ever pushing and jumping
and elbowing after the pelf:
Where every last Teller is humping
for no n at all but himself.
Z dOn't want to live in the shadder of
skyscrapers half a mile high.
, don't know a place that is sadder
than n where no sunshine is nigh.
There isn't a flower with the pickin';
There isn't no grass meath our feet.
There isn't no sort Of a chicken save
them which Is ready to eat.
1T don't matter much where you
ramble.
You want hear a lone rooster crow
And it's purity safe fer to gamble you
Wont hear q sound that you know;
Just thumpin' and chuggin' and DOT
OF automobiles all the time.
just burnin' up benxine and scootin'
Around In q way that's a crime.
There's nothing but hurry and furry
and hustle and hustle and jam.
The best thing they do IL to worry and
hasten through life with a slam.
Oh. yes. I'm q rube, I confess It. The
hayseed still ciings to my hair;
1t doesn't take long fer to guess It.;