The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1912-07-13

as lie started 10 go, Fosdick, who
had been necessarily consulting his
watch, checked him TO ask: "Oh. con-
ductor, when do We get to the state
line of dear old Utah?"
Dear old Utah" the conductor
grinned. Wed "a been there already
If we hadn't "a fell behind a little"
Just my luck to be late" Fosdick
moaned
What you so anxious TO be In
Utah for, E'osdick?" Ashton asked. sus-
piciously. You go on to Frisco, don't
you?"
Fosdick was evidently confused at
the direct question. He tried to
dodge it; 'Yes, but-funny how things
have changed. When we started. no.
body was speaking to anybody except
his wife, now"
Now" said Ashton, drily, every
body's speaking to everybody except
his wife"
You're wrong there" Little Jim
ME interrupted. Il wasn't speaking
mile interrupted. 81 wasn't speaking
TO my wife in the first place. We got
on as strangersh and we're strangersh
yet. Mrs. Wellnton is a"
"A queen among women. We knovI
Dry up" said Ashton, and then they
heard the querulous voice Of the por-
ter OF their sleeping car: II tell you.
don't know nothin' about the buffet
business"
The conductor pushed him In with
a gruff command. Crawl in that cage
and get busy"
Still the porter protested: "Mista
Pullman engaged me for a sleepin'
car, not drinkin' car. I'm a berth
maker, not mixer" He cast a re-
sentful glance through the window
that served also as bar. and his
whole tone changed: Say, is you
goin' to allow me loose amongst all
you do, | can't guarantee my con-
duck"
them beautiful bottles? Say, man, IL
IF you even sniff one Of those bot
les," the conductor warned him. "IIl
crack 1t over your head"
That won't worry me none-as
long as my moufs open." He smacked
his chops over the prospect Of init
macy with that liquid treasury.
"Lordy! Well, III try to control my
emotions-but remember, don't guar
antee nOthin'."
The conductor started to go, but
paused for final instructions: And
remember-after' We get to Utah we
can't serve any hard liquor at ALL"
What's that? Don't they low moth.
in In that old Utah but ice-cream
soda?"
That's about all. If you touch a.
drop, I'll leave you in Utah for life"
"Oh, Lordy. I'll be good!"
The conductor left the excited black
and went his way. Ashton was the
first to speak: Say, Porter. can you
mix drinks?"
The porter ruminated, then con.
fessed: We'll, not on the outside. no.
sir. If you-all is thirsty you better or.
der the simplest things you can think
or. II you want to command anything
fancy, Lord knows what you'd get.
Supposin' you was to say, Gimme a
Tom Collins I'd be just as liable as
not to pass you a Jack Johnson"
We'll, can you open beer?"
oh, I'm a natural born beer
opener"
Rush 1t out then. My throat is as
full OF alkali dust these windows"
The porter soon appeared with a
tray full Of cotton-topped glasses. The
day was hot and the alkali dust very
oppressive, and the beer was cold. DIR.
Temple looked on it when 1t was am
Der, and suffered himself to be bullied
into taking q glass.
He felt that he was the greatest sim
ner on earth, but worst Of all was the
fact that when he had fallen, the for
bldden brew was not sweet He was
inexperienced enough to sip it and it
was like foaming Quinine on his pal
ate. But be kept at it from sheer
shame, and his luxurious transgres-
sion was its own punishment.
The doleful Mallory was on his way
to join the club" Crossing the ves-
thule he had met the conductor, and
had Ventured to quiz him along the
old lines:
Excuse be, haven't you taken any
cle-gymen on board this train YETI"
Devil a one"
Don't you ever carry any preachers
on this road?"
Usually We get one or two. Last
trip We carried a whole Methodist
convention"
"A whole convention last trip! Just
my luck"
The unenlightened conductor turned
TO call back: Say, up In the forward
car we got couple of undertakers.
They be Of any use to you?"
Not yet"