The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1912-07-18
Decline and
Fan

who had come on a visit. Il don't take
to him at ALL"
why, the ideal" exclaimed her
granddaughter in surprise. MIR. Jar.
gers is one of the most popular men
l know! He's asked everywhere and
if he pays any attention to a girl ev7
cry one takes her up. Of course he's
older than just a mere boy, but I'm
SUR he is well bred and entertaining
and"
HE can be all that" interrupted
her relative, land even then l sha'n't
want to welcome him as a member of
the family! It's because he reminds
me SO of Artemus Milkins-I guess
you heard of him. Artemus
was one of the b%est-looking young
men in two states and all the girls
were crazy about him. They were al
ways getting into quarrels over Arte-
mus, and they watched one another as
cats watch mice, waiting to see which
way they were going to jump, be-
cause they were so afraid they'd get
beaten out when it came to marrying
him.
"Artemus must have had wonderful
endurance and a constitutional disre-
gard for sleep, for otherwise he never
could have stood up under all the din.
ners and dances and balls and other
frivolities to which he was asked.
Once when he had the grip and stay
ed away from a party it vas just ruin
ed, for the girls all went home early.
There wasn't a house in town where
the mother wasn't more than willing
to sit up nights finishing her daugh-
ter's new frock If Artemus was going
to take the girl anywhere.
Naturally, after a few years the
first crowd Of girls gave up and mar
ried Lesser lights, but there always
was a new crop of girls for Artemus
to be the idol of, and, I tell you, they
burned incense!
"He kept getting handsomer, too.
After a girl has been out ten years
she may be pretty and all that, but
she hasn't the charm of youth that is
SO fetching. With a man it is differ
ent, A man keeps right on being
good-looking and popular and when
they begin calling him one of the
bachelors it really adds tone to him.
Fancy its adding tone to a girl when
they begin referring to her as one
Of the older crowd!
Everybody wondered why Artemus
didn't marry and settle down, but I
knew 1t was because he was having
too good a time What's the use of ty-
ing yourself down to n slave when
you can just as we'll have twenty or
more?
"Well, for years and years Artemus
was our most popular bachelor. an in
stitution, an aggravation, a sighed;for
prize, an ornament to our parties. His
decline was very gradual and unno.
ticeable. I don't think any Of us no.
ticed it for a long time after Artemus
did. I presume when the tailor added
five inches to the girth of his new
dress suit waistband it made Artemus
sit up at last and take notice and
think.
when a man thinks he grows senti.
mental. Artemus decided it was time
for him to get married. He must
have enjoyed lining up the girls and
selecting the favored one, because he
picked out the youngest and prettiest
of that years debutantes and very
gently and kindly informed her that
she could marry him. You see, we
heard all about these things, because
nobody felt it a breach of confidence
to talk about Artemus' doings.
1T must have been a shock to Arte.
mus when Inez failed to burst into
tears Of joy. Inez blushed and STAN.
mered and said: No, thank you,' in a
scared way and then glided from him,
giggling. That night she told Tom
Flitt all about it as they sat in the
hammock. Tom said, why, the old
donkey!' and kissed her Indignantly.
."Artemus called next on Serena
Phipps. Serena was 20 and popular,
but inclined to be a highbrow. Arte.
mu remembered how she had looked
at him when she was 1S and he re.
Elected that possibly his GOODNESS had
driven her to economics and social re-
form. When he proposed to Serena
she regarded him as though he were
a bug. Then she told him frankly
that she wouldn't marry him because
he wasn't her ideal of a man and she
was no more in love with him than
she was with the weeping willow tree
outside, and would he please shut the
gate when he went out, so that the
dogs wouldn't trample the flower beds
There were two after that, both
older than Serena. Artemus seemed
to decide that years might bring more
appreciation Of life's blessings. Meth.
er Of the two seemed to yearn for
blessing in the shape of Artemus
One Of them had eyes that almost
crossed, too. Her refusal must have
chagrined him deeply.
"He began to look haggard and he
rarely smiled. The whole procession
rushed by gayly without him, and
while he was in this respondent frame
Of mind his landlady, who was As and
used bad grammar and had a son aged
Is, married him. I think it served
him right. And somehow your Mr.
larger reminds me terribly Of the
Artemus kind. and I don't want"
There may" interrupted her grand