Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-12-01

In Indianapolis. Ind, they are still
talking about certain state senator.
whose name shall be Smith for nara
tive purposes. Smith was mechanic
who got himself elected somehow OF
other, and appeared in the state cap
ltal in a frock coat and silk topper
looking as If he were the only one OF
his kind in captivity. The thing which
appealed to State Senator Smith with
great force was that being senator
he was exempt from arrest. COnse-
quently there was nothing that Smith
overlooked. He smashed saloons. riot
ed at cheap dances. rode about in low
necked hacks singing all sorts Of songs
at the top Of his lungs, and got to
know pretty nearly every policeman in
Indiana.
One time Peg Hamilton gave ball
for the express purpose Of entertain
ing the Indiana legislature. Peg, be II
known. was Booth Tarkington's favor
lite hack driver. 1t was grand nan,
an unceasing stream. Senator Smith
was there early. He took to running
things with a high hand. Toward mid
night he climbed hand-over- hand into
orchestra was laying off for few
moments. and demanded that the artists
should proceed with the. national an
them.
"Who are your" demanded the leader.
with sulphurOus Intersections.
Expurgated of it's profanity, the SEN
ator's reply was plain Introduction OF
himself. The orchestra leader simply
dropped Smith over the balcony and
went on eating hot dog. The floor
manager called a policeman and Sen
ator Smith was escorted outside.
Guess you don't recognize me-" said
Smith. handing his captor a card.
And with that the policeman blew his
ed. and the trio of the guardians of the
peace marched back into the ballroom
with the senator, and going straight
to the orchestra leader they shouted up
to him:
Hey there, you mutt don't you know
Senator Smith when you see him. You
go ahead and play anything the SEN
ator wants"
And they say that at o'clock in the
morning the senator was wreathed in
a bass horn. blowing frightful blasts
out of tune with every other instru-
ment in the orchestra, while the mu-
sicians themselves were scared for
their lives. trying to obey the senator
orders to play Little Boy Blue.
* * X x
One Of the most fashionable young
women went into one of the smartest
shops to buy some place cards Wednes-
day. She picked out dozen very fine
ones and then held them up inquiringly
toward a salesperson who was chewing
gum. The fashionable young woman
inquiring glance had reference to the
price, but the salesperson evidently mis-
understood, for she answered:
Them? Oh them's place cards. You
write your names on 'em and put EN-
where you eat at.
4 x !: X
When Jim Hay tr:fled with that per-
fectly wonderful automobile of his. and
the machine kicked him SO hard In the
arm that the bone was shattered to small
BITS, he went into dry dock at hospital
where the nurses refused to listen to mis-
demand for food such as chile con carne.
canvas-back duck, grilled bones stuned
peppers. cafe noir. etc. There Is reliable
information to the effect that Jim roared
louder for food than he had ever been
known to roar previous to that event.
and it may be said in passing that Jim
earned to roar from a hungry lion. For
days they starved him; and then one day
a trained nurse tripped In. with profes.
sional air, and placed before him about
one thimbleful of cOnsomme or some
other sample of liquid diet. The hungry
James sucked 1t up so that 1t disappeared
like snowflake upon warm stove ana