Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-07-05
DECEPTIVE ADVICE
Writer Tells Editors to Work for
Parcels Post-kiIling the
Pussy Cat.
WHAT THE REAL FACTS ARE
Why Country Newspaper Men Should
Wage War on Twin EVIL With
Mall Order Houses-organIxe
Against its Passage.

A writer Of national Importance has
actually had the self poise to advise
the country newspaper man to work
for the undesirable parcels post bill.
II your newspaper were a cat and
had nine lives and the adviser had
handed you an old-fashioned blunder-
buss with the admonition, go out and
shoot the cat-the gun scatters!" he
could not more effectively have adj
vised you to injure yourself.
But 1t isn't necessary to grow caus-
tic ON this score-for the country
newspaper man, of all business men,
knows what grand things the parcels
post and the mail order house, in dou-
BILE harness, will do for him. And as
ne rides around in that new $4,000
automobile made from easy business
given him by the catalog houses, he
already feels his waistband tighten
ing and his chest swelling like
pouter pigeon's-NOT!
II the parcels post bill and the
mail order houses ever walk down the
business aisle together while the or
gan peals the wedding march from
Lohengrin, the country editor can go
away back in the cool, outrageous
wood and sit down with his sorrow.
He can go over again in his fancy the
days when he landed with shirt-tail
full of type and head full of en-
thusiasm. He can recall the days of
struggle when he lived on dried APP
IL ., II
day and half the night trying to make
the pay end OF his financial belt meet
the buckle end of his hunger. He can
live once more the days of promise
and denial, of struggle and endeavor,
during which the weakling newspaper
child grew lusty and healthy. He can
conjure the story of his small begin
ming and his humble success-hard-
earned success, deserving success.
And then he can begin to think
down hill again, dating the lofty
heights from the day the mail order
houses began running the home mer-
chants, the mail order houses that ad-
vertise by catalog and fill the orders
with dispatch and substitution. I'M
sight and unseen. He can look in on
the wedding ceremony of the parcels
post and the mail order houses, and as
he gazes on into futurity, he can move
his blistered feet out of the drip of his
scalding tears-for his heart will be
OF stone If he doesn't weep in remorse
at being a pinhead for letting the peo-
pie of his community go to bed I'M
mindful of their danger the night of
the wedding!
What makes the country editor
prosperous? Is 1t the money that
goes to Seesaw & Fiddlebeck in Chi
cago for prunes and felt boots and
dyed rooster feathers for millinery de-
bauches, or is 1t the money that is
paid over the counter right at home,
the money that permits the merchant
o live and advertise in the newspaper
mans publication, in the home news
paper that Is and always will be. IL
not choked to death, the greatest fac
tor in the upbuilding of community?
Why, | lived in suburb once where
there wasn't newspaper. We couldn't
notify each other of a whist party or
town meeting without spending a
lot of money for stamps and station
cry. The people always were in a
wrangle over something they might
have agreed upon had there been a
newspaper to explain. The civic life
of the place was as innocuous as
dead rat and the business of the town
wouldn't have kept real live Chicago
dude in cigarettes The town didn't
amount to whoop-and that's the
truth. And the reason was-no news
paper! moved away. Life is too
short to live in communities that
haven't sense enough to have news
papers.
But when the parcels post and the
mail order houses walk hand in hand,
making deliveries easy and as salts
factory as the mail order houses are
honest. the local merchant will begin
to feel that business pinch he knows
so well since the disease OF mailor-
deritis got abroad in the land. He
has felt 1t coming on for months. He
has had night sweats and night wor-
ries. He has stood around behind his
counters until he has gotten the wood
en- leg and feels that pip is none too
good for him! And now the big thing
In diseases strikes him. 1t hits him
in the vital concentric OF his cash
register, which is always located In
the region of the heart and very
dangerous spot to tritie with. and
lands him in the arms OF the sheriff
In no time at all.
Among the liabilities Is q big bill
owed the newspaper man. less few
items OF merchandise purchased by
the editors wife for the kids.
But the editor isn't shocked. He is
wise and tried man. He has met
disappointment so many times that
It's javelin doesn't percolate. he is
Just like the man who takes one kind
OF physic too long-he loses the ef-
| feet. And so the editor braces him
self and goes merrIly back to his hum
ming job-press to feed handbills into
its cavernous craw and think OF hons
and family ties ard how jamie peeds
shoes and Mary must be sent away to
school and wife isn't any too strong
and should have a girl. and-but may
| be you're married yourself. and If YOU
are, You will understand. II you are
a bachelor, 1t isn't my fault and you
haven't any right TO understand any.
thing
One by one the shadows fall across
| the path of the editor. The merchants
hang on and then hang on come more.
: Thav dO their hest but their hest