The Owosso times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1897-1926, 1912-05-17

long as my mouf's Open" He smacked
his chops over the prospect OF init,
macy with that liquid treasury
"Lordy! Well. I'll try to control my
emotions---but remember, don't guar.
antee nothin,."
The conductor started to go, but
paused for final instructions: And
remember-after We get to Utah we
can't serve any hard liquor at ALL"
whats that? Don't they low moth
in in that old Utah but ice-cream
solar"
That's about all. II you touch
drop, Ill leave you in Utah for life"
"Oh, Lordy. I'll be good!"
The conductor left the excited black
and went his way. Ashton was the
first to speak: Say. Porter. can you
mix drinks?"
The porter ruminated, then con-
fessed: well. not on the outside. no.
sir. II you-all is thirsty you better or
der the simplest things you can think
Of. If you want to command anything
fancy, Lord knows what you'd get.
Supposin' you was to say. Gimme a
Tom Collins I'd be Just as liable as
not to pass you Jack Johnson"
We'll. can you open beerf"
"Oh. I'm a natural born beer
opener" ,BG 1t
Rush It out then. My throat is as
full of alkah dust as these windows"
The porter soon appeared with q
tray full Of cottop-topped glasses. The
day was hot and the alkali dust very
oppressive, and the beer was cold. DR..
Temple looked on it when 1t was am
Der, and suffered himself to be bullied
into taking q glass.
He felt that he was the greatest sim
ner on earth, but worst Of all was the
fact that when he had fallen, the for
hidden brew was not sweet. He was
inexperienced enough to sip it and it
was like foaming Quinine on his pal
ate. But he kept at 1t from sheer
shame, and his luxurious transgres.
sion was it's own punishment.
The doleful Mallory was on his way
to join the CLUB" Crossing the YES
thule he had met the conductor, and
had ventured to quiz him along the
old lines:
Excuse he, haven't you taken any
clergymen on board this train YETI"
Devil a one."
Don't you ever carry any preachers
on this road?"
Usually we get one or two. Last
trip We carried a whole Methodist
convention"
"A whole convention last trip! Just
my luck!"
The unenlightened conductor turned
to call back: Say, up in the forward
car we got couple of undertakers.
They be of any use to your"
mot yet"
Then Mallory dawdled on into the
smoking room, where he found his
own porter, who explained that he
had been promoted to the bottlery."
DO we come to station stop
soon?" Mallory asked.
well, not for a considerable inter-
val. Do you want to get out and walk
up and DOWN."
II DON'T" said Mallory, taking from
under his coat Snoozleums, whom he
had smuggled past the new conductor.
Meanwhile. Porter, could you give
him something to eat to distract
him."
The porter grinned, and picking up
bill Of fare held 1t out. 81 got
meenuel. It amt written in dog, but
you can explain it to him. What would
yo' canine desiah, sah?"
Snoozleums put out a paw and NAL
lory read what it indicated: "He says
he'd Hke filet Chateaubriand, but If
you have any old bones, he'll take
those" The porter gathered Snoozle-
ums in and disappeared with him into
the buffet, Mallory calling after him:
Don't let the conductor see him"
DR.. Temple advanced on the dis
consulate youth with an effort at
cheer: How is our bridegroom CHS
beautiful afternoon?"
Mallory glanced at his costume: IT
feel like a rainbow gone wrong. Just
my luck to have to borrow from
everybody. Look at me! This collar
Of Mr.. Welingtons makes me feel like
peanut I'm a rubber tire" He turned
to Fosdick.
81 say, Mr.. Fosdick. what size col
lar do you wear?"
Fourteen and half" said 'Fosdick.
Fourteen and a half!-why don't
you get neck? You haven't got
plain white shirt, have you? Our
English friend lent me this, but it's
purple, and Mr.. Ashton's socks are
maroon, and this peacock blue tie is
very unhappy"
Il think can At you out" said F'os-
dick.
And II you had an extra pair Of
socks" Mallory pleaded-"just one
pair Of Unconditional socks"
It'll show you my repertoire"
"All right, I'll see you later" Then
he went up to Wellington, with much
hesitance Of manner. by the way.
Mr.. Wellington. do you suppose Mrs.
Wellington could lend Miss--Mrs.--
could lend Marjorie some-some--"
Wellington waved him aside with