davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Apples for Winter ice.

Pare, core and quarter enough APP
pies to I'LL a large market basket.
take a barrel, put an iron vessel CON
tanning live Goals at the bottom. sus-
pend the basket in the barrel, put a
large kitchen spoonful of sulphur on
the Goals, and cover barrel with thick
quilts. Leave one-half hour. They
must then stand about five or six
weeks for the sulphur to eyaporate
Then cook in the usual way. They
viii taste like apples fresh from the
tree. The Delineator.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Put a good meat bone on at G o'clock
and boil until II. in about three quarts
Of water. Skim occasionally the i'm.
pnrities which arise Then put in
one-half dozen tomatoes, three carrots.
one onion and four lriah potatoes. all
chopped fine Season with salt and
pepper to taste. When vegetables are
done. strain the soap. replace on fire.
Allow It to boil up. then thicken with
a little -four Before sending TO the
table drop in a few parsley leaves
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
The Kind He Was.

Many funny things happen in the
courtroom.
short time ago negro was tried
on the charge Of killing another negro
in the county jail.
What kind Of man was this man
you killed." the negro was asked
We'll, sab. blieve me-" said the wit
ness. dat niggah was a ignorano
nous pusillanlmous degen' ate. Go.
lumbus Evening Dispatch.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Kidney Pills the swelling disappear.
ed and he felt himself again. He says
he has been benefited and blessed by
the use Of Dodds Kidney Pills. Sew
eral months later he wrote: have
not changed my faith in your remedy
since the above statement was author
lied. Correspond with Rev. Z. He's
lop about this wonderful remedy.
Dodds Kidney Pills. soc. per box at
your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co,
Buffalo. N. Y. Write for Household
Hints, also music of National Anthem
English and German wordsl and re-
cipes for dainty fishes. All sent free.
Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

ing, was dizzy
and exhausted at
the least exer-
tion. Hands and
feet were cold
ard he had such
\ 3raggiug sensa-
ton across the
loins that it was
difficult to move.
After using 5
49,
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
" hll knom That kInd-

What ara the wild waves sayingl q"
murmured the ~oman as she stood on
the pier viewing the mighty main
Nothing, Maria, replied the man
hoaraely. They are ike some people
We know; they make a great deal Of
noise. but don't say anything"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Simple Taste.

Something mentally wrong with
Kenworthy. don't you think7"
why so?"
i asked him to come over and play
auction bridge with US last night,
and be said he would rather waste bis
time playing bean-porridge-hot' or tit
tattoo. W
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
hnuinn Exhibition

Uncle Ezra-"Then you think the
battle of Wounded Knee was a great
pr event than the Reformation ?"
Uncle Eben-"Certainiy I've seen
them both and I'll bet the battle
took at least thousand more fcet Of
film Puck
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Her Object.

81 married a man without fault"
Then that accounts for what
heard"
What was that?"
THAT you married your husband to
reform him"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
ExpedItlna the Mouemen,.

"A newspaper writer says the Eng.
lish language is still marching ma
jestically over the face of the globe. ="
If that's the case, a word like in
comPrehensibility' probably marches
in two sections"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
A Sick Man
Writes Or. Hart
man About
X J d n e y
Disease.

A gentleman
writes me: Il
was greatly in
terested in your
article describ-
ing the Kauf
man C a S e OF
serious disease
of the kidneys.
The description
of his case ex-
a thy outlines
my condition. L
am sure If Pc
runa cured him
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
can she 30 lt7

Zoology Professor-Aii Fluff, what
is natural selection?
Fluff Natural selection is where a
young lady picks out a fellow with
lots OF money and mEFries him.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
suirabIe Attire.

How we're the sailors dressed who
we're left on the desert islsnds?'
In maroon suits. of course"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Bags made money so fast at one
time that he had to give it up"
His health broke DOWN."
No; he went to jail for counter
feitiug."
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
The Real Proof.

My fance told me he would prove
his love not by words but by deeds.
They all say that
But he brought the deeds to me
in my name"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Tourist-"You say there's true de-
mocracy in this town Bilge Miller
Yep A eelluloid collar never kept
a man outer high society here. "-Bos>
ton Post
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

I've got a fireless cooker in my
house" 81
That's nothing. rye got a smoke
less husband in mine"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

He Feems to be so superficial"
said Mrs Oldcastle.
Yes" replied Mrs. Gottalotte. as
she hung her $4,000 necklace over the
back of chair I've noticed that.
Hes got halt dozen big ones stuffed
the t. claims he caught. | wouldn't
have such things in my dining room
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Mans ccntrariness.

When a man is sick he wants to get
well worse than anything else in the
world. yet people are pretty shiftless
about safeguarding health.-Atehison
Globe.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
senpible shit.

why does she dress so mannishly?"
wei, she was no beauty as a girl
but she makes fairly good-looking
boy"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
A cLEReYMANs TESTIMONY.

The Rev. Edmund Heslop of Wig
Ion, Pa, suffered from Dropsy for a
year. His limbs and feet were swol-
len and nuffed. He had hnart fintter-
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Listeners seldom hear any good Of
themselves-or of anybody else.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Shelf you should hold hand like
that
To you what make would best ap-
pear?
He-Why, If I held a hand like yours.
think Id make 1t diamonds, dear.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

II we could see ourselves as others
zee US we wouldn't believe H.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

II girls arms have pretty dimples
I'm them she'll get them sunburned.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
TURKISH DISASTER
MOST COMPLETE
sULTAH's SOLDIERS SLAIN BY
THOUSANDS AND HIS ARMIES
DEMoRALIZED.
DEFEAT LlKEKED TO SEDAN

English War Correspondent the First
TO Give the Events Of the Few
Weeks That Seem to Have Brought
About the Downfall Of the Ancient
Turkish Empire.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Occasionally patient swears by his
doctor, but more often at him.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

ny using Coles Carholisalve. 1t is RIOS,
effective remedy All druggists. IS and SOC. Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Won CAN cuRR cATARRH

because his wife broke down.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Some men go lame when It comes to
minding their own business.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
ohiectlons.

You giye up too easily. Why don't
tou get a grip?'
IT'S the other way The grips got
me-"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13
Contrary Causes.

Why did links break up housekeep
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

Storm centers as a rule defy central
limitations.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1912-11-13

a short respite % Abdcllah Pasha's
army from shot and shell. The men
badly needed sleep and food. but the
Turkish commissariat was nonex-
igfeuf
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

Thanks to dual systems of ignition,
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

modern magnetos, built in to the
motors in almost every instance, and
all the inventions of the modern sys-
tenn of igniting gasoline vapor in en-
CINE cylinders, the day of the electrical
breakdown is at an end. No more,
with a car which is any way up-to-
date, is it possible for a man to get
seven or eight miles from nowhere out
in the country and then have his bait
teries give out, and be stalled in conse-
quence. No more does the boog-a-boo
of ignition trouble follow the humble
autoist everywhere he goes, and haunt
him even in his hard-earned sleep.
There are several things we have to
be thankful for, as the parson says on
Thanksgiving Day, but we hardly APP
preciate what they really are till the
summing up is made.
Big business is the watchword for
the Automobile Show, which opened
in the First Regiment Armory last
Saturday. Dealers both in pleasure
and commercial vehicles have a bee in
their bonnet, and from the pleased
looks on their faces said bee is hum
ming in an optimistic fashion rather
than singing In the natural manner.
Business was expected to begin to boom
the very first day of the show, and the
dealers planned so that once the race
started the speed would not slacken
right up to the last minute. While the
paper factories are not as yet working
overtime making the contract forms, IT
is hoped that something like such a
condition will obtain long before to-
night. When the truth is told there
is really no reason why business
should not boom. The local dealers I'M
questionably have the goods to de-
liver, and there seems to be q very
apparent atmosphere among the buying
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

it 10 be, but the secondhand small
car. bought from any but a reputable
shop or dealer, is more than apt to
prove a second case of the pretty blue
bowl that the little boy bought and
later found that it was clear glass
with colored water inside. Its exterior
appears as good as the day it was
new, but its engine-its vitals-are no
good.
Too much care cannot be exercised
in taking turns at any place, but es-
pecially within city limits and in con-
gested districts. Time and time again
serious, and Outlines fatal, accidents
which might have been averted by a
slight slowing-down in crowded cor
ners of the city, have occurred and
the public has openly censured the
driver. The day is not far off when
the careless driver will be regarded al
most as the criminal who commits an
assault and there is little reason why
he should not be. There is an increas-
ing tendency to speed by a busy cor
ned and this should be curbed at once.
Late pedestrians on many Of the prin-
cipal thoroughfares Of Newark have
noticed that there are many cars
which shoot through the streets in the
wee sma' hours of the morning, dis
painfully ignoring people who are walk
ing the streets at that time.
Every automobile owner should cul-
tivate more than a passing familiarity
with his engine. Every engine has its
eccentricities which takes more than
a general knowledge of that type to
understand and 1t is these things that
enable a man to really enjoy his ma
chine. 1t is, of course. necessary to
urge every car owner to know the fun
damentals Of engine construction, but
drivers would be surprised to know
how many car. owners there are who
trust themselves to out Of the way
places with the greatest sang froid, not
knowing any more about an automobile
than its starting and stopping. Time
and again an automobile Is found
stranded on the road simply because of
a trifing break which is repaired with
no effort and little loss of time by any
one who understands the first princi-
pies of engine construction. To ride
a horse one must understand some-
thing of the nature of the specie and
the nature of the one animal in par
t~icular; to run an automobile, much of
the same general class of knowledge
is necessary.
Thanks to dual systems of ignition.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24
SEEN AND HEARD UP AND DOWN GASOLINE ROW"
LOW PRICED CARS HARD
TO GET in EUROPE NOW.
DetrOiter, Newest Auto, Found
Ready Reception Abroad.

&c re of the almost incredible fea-
lures in connection with launching the
Detroiter car said President Claude
S. Briggs, of the Briggs-Detroiter Com
pany, yesterday, has been the spread
of information about the car through
foreign countries. There must be an
absolute famine of low-priced cars in
Europe and other foreign lands. Al
though our first announcements were
put out only six weeks ago-and only
in American trade papers and the
Detroit dailies-we are now receiving
inquiries by the dozen every day from
dealers abroad who want to handle
the Detroiter.
Just today a dealer in Turin, Italy.
applied for the agency in his city. He.
sent credentials of the finest charac-
ter and all that. We had received at
least a dozen previously from that
same city.
1--WE have already closed with deal
ers in the Philippines, Australia, Eng
land, Canada and Italy. We have
about decided on our dealers for Odes-
sa, Moscow and st. Petersburg, Rus
STA. Since no cars are manufactured
in that country the dealers are UNI
usually keen for 'low-priced American
cars.
without making any determined
effort to go after the foreign business
the first ear. it is coming to US SO fast
we can't begin to supply the demand.
That simply proves that Europe Is
experiencing a low-priced car famine
and doubtless all the other makers of
moderate-priced cars are finding an
immense outlet for their goods abroad"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24
SO n. b. Maxwell
Special. $1,48O

Compare its aristocrat
style-you will find in
this car the latest refine
ments adopted by the ex-
pensivc cars. It's new,
ventilated fore-door, flush
side vestibuled steel body
with inside control, Co
lumbia Honeycomb type
radiator, new designed
bonnet and other parts
make it a quality car.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

With the moving of the Overland
Company II the White Motor Car
Company to their new quarters, one
at Broad street opposite the other at
the corner of Broad street and Central
avenue, the increasing exodus toward
the Central avenue section by local
dealers is brought forcibly to the front.
There is no longer much doubt in the
minds of even the most skeptical that
upper and lower Central avenue and
the more uptown section will be the
future haven of the distributors of mo-
tor cars, accessories and furnishings
who would have business seek them
out. 1t is In a direct line with the
New York traffic and that from the Or
anges passes through. These are two
advantages which cannot be denied.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

It's price is beyond COM
parison--through the great
purchasing and manufac-
turing economies of the
United States Motor Co.
We are ready to let this
car prove its excelling
points--call today-see It
test it. Let us bring
it to you if you cannot
come soon. Write today
for catalog.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

public CT -haVe-the-long- -gfeen-and-
inteud-to-come-across With both sides
willing there should be little difficulty
experienced in effecting an agreement.
satisfactory to both parties.
Were no admission at all charged it
is more than likely that the show which
began in the First Regiment Armory
last Saturday would pay for itself
over and over again. What the deal
ers need is to get their product in
sight of the public. Once everybody
interested is familiarized with a car
or an accessory, it is easy shedding the
rest of the way. Not hat the admls-
sion charged at the armory is any
thing more thar it should be. On the
contrary, it is just what it should be.
1t let's the proper class of people in
and keeps the proper class of people
out, all for one and the same price.
Which is as it should be, But what
he dealers want to do is to get the
people in and they would be willing
to pay the entrance fee for prospective
purchasers over and over again. Not
a one of them but what would jump
at the chance if offered them.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24

Accessory exhibits will be a feature
Of the local show which is not to be
shifted at. With the new tires, vacuum
bottles, tubes, wheels and so on in
endless amount, which are to be found
on every hand in increasing number
every day, and with the proven quail
ties for good which everything shown
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1912-02-24
COMPARE
with any car within
$500 Of its pricel

That is the surest way of convincing yourself beyond
all doubt that the new Maxwell Special is 1925 I'M
disputed leader.
Compare its great horsepo uer with that of the best
$1,000 cars-36.h Il. p. means more power than you viii
ever need; plenty in reserve for emergencies.
The Washington times., 1912-01-17
Joe O'Brien Was Ball
Player Many Years Ago

Now, don't think for minute that
! have not played baseball, because I
have" said Joe O'Brlen, who is the new
secretary of the Giants. 1T was as
long ago as when there were sand lots
in Milwaukee. Perhaps the most ex-
citing game in which l ever engaged
was one In which we were three runs
behind and the bases were filled. Di-
rectly outside our right field was a bed
of Quicksand. 1t had been an object
of curiosity and dread to us boys from
early childhood. / was at bat, and
don't think that ever hit a ball harder
in my life. 1t Travelled as straight to-
ward that bed of quicksand as If 1t had
been pulled with string. Bill Tomp-
kins always said that II hit the quick
sand plumb in the center.
"Of course. everybody scored. 1 did
not know about the ball hitting the
quicksand, and when / crossed the
horne plate | called for the ball. There
was a reason. ! had borrowed that bal
and. being naturally or an honest dis
position, | wished to return it. Where's
the ball?' said !. Snick Kretzer led
me toward the qucksand- He extend
ed a finger and pointed solemnly to-
ward the entrance. 'Joe,' said he, III
| know anything about geography and
the innards of the earth, that ball Is
somewhere near China at the presenI
time
The Washington times., 1912-01-17
Five Leagues in One
Season for Ex-Nap

CLEVELAND. Jan. 17.-Five leagues
in one season for one man is going
some, but that is the record held by a
former Nap. Shortstop Newton. The
.nfielder has Just been sold to the Roa-
noke. Virginia League club. from which
he originally came. Mobile recalled
him from Yazoo City. where he was
sent In the carly part OF last season.
With his sale back to Roanoke. New
ton can claim something of a record
for 1911. i'm that he was technically in
five leagues during the season. He
started out with the Roanoke club.
went to the majors. was sent over INTO
the Amsric an Association, went to Mo-
bile, sent to Yazoo City. was then re-
called and now goes back to the club
With which he began his professional
baseball career.
Newton showed up so we'll in 1910 that
he was drafted by the Maps. He never
got a chance with Cleveland. but in the
spring of 1911 was shipped over to Toledo
In the A. \. Dnckey Holmes was scour-
ing the country for shortstop about
that time, and Charlie Frank tipped
him pfi To Newton. Ducky took him to
Mobile. Newton's arm. went back on
him and he was placed on the bench
He was finally passed on to Yazoo City
with q string on him. At the end OF the
season he was recalled and now goes
back to Roanoke.
The Washington times., 1912-01-17
Baltimore Swimmers Meet
Nautilus Club Tomorrow

Baltimore best swimmers will meet
the Nautilus Club Of the Washington
Y. M. c. A. in a dual swimming match
st the Y. M. c. A. pool here tomorro"
night. There will be nine events, ir
which are entered about fifteen men.
The list Of entries and officials fol
lows:
2OO-yard relay race-Baltimore. MitSh.
ell, Baugher, Canister, Ginsberg, Baer
Washington, Miller, Bammon. Ruther'
fGad; sSi;ysrd Gd''j Junior, Ans Boys under fifteen
weight less than 116 pounds-Baltimore
Baer. Baugher; Washington. Carrick
So-yard swim-Balumore. Mitchell
Canister: Washington. Cults. Ansley
Plunge for distance-Baltimore, Chris
topher, Eiseman, Barker. Cottman
Washington. AnsleE, E,a,timans sr%mner' Mitchell
Baugher; Washington, Bammon, Cutts
SO-yard breast stroke-Baltimore, Gins
berg, Stein; Washington, X. B. Hansen
Fancy diving-Baltimore. De Vail
, Cottman stanton, FROST, Ganstef
Washington, Sheetz. Ansley, Smith.
sO-yard back stroke-Baltimore. Duck
Washington, Crane, Rutherford, Miller
2OO-yard swim-Baltimore, Gtnsberg
McHanry; Washington. Wood. Cults
The officials are: Referee, w. G
Stuart: judges, Charles Orme. Lohn ]
Meany, j. c, Doyle, and ID. z: Garges
timers, w. c. Thacher, d. G. Grain, II
Brent, and ]. Farley; starter c
Edward Beckett; clerk Of course, w. w
tors, William Peet, X. c. Miller, C. M
King, and Mr.. Johanessen announcer
Nils G. Hansen.
The Washington times., 1912-01-17
WASH|NGTON'S BEST
ATHLETES TO ENTER
BIG RICHMOND MEET
Georgetown and Hatchetites
Will Contest in
Relays.

Many OF Washington's best track ath-
letes will enter the games at the big
meet to be held in Richmond. February
"a, by the Richmond Light Infantry
Blues and Richmond College. George
towns crack relay team will be seen in
competition against Washington and
Lee and George Washington will battle
against the four of st. Johns.
Virginia will oppose Carolina in a
mile relay contest. Episcopal High
Woodberry Forest and Baltimore CITY
Colleges will figure in triangular re-
lay. Many other relay races will be
arranged between preparatory, high,
and grammar schools of Virginia.
Though answers have yet to be- re-
ceived. 1t is expected that some of the
best athletes at Yale, PENNSYLVANIA,
Princeton, Cornell, Lehigh. Swarthmore.
and Brown will be seen In their events
on the floor OF the Blues armory. where
the meet Is to be held.
An Interesting feature Of the meet
will be a Mutt and JEFF relay between
the long men and the short men i'm
Richmond College and the Richmond
Blues.
Entry blanks will arrive in this city
before the end Of the week, and Il Is
believed that fully fifty local athletes
will make the trip to Richmond next
month.