davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Particularly the Ladies.

Not only pleasant and refreshing to
he taste. but gently cleansing and sweet.
ening to the system. Syrup Of Figs and
Elixir Of SIENNA is particularly adapted
to ladies' and children. and beneficial in
all cases in which a wholesome. strength.
ening and effective laxative should be
used. 1t is perfectly safe at all times and
dispels colds, headaches and the pains
caused by indigestion and constipation so
promptly and effectively that it is the one
perfect family laxative which gives salts
faction to all and is recommended by
millions Of families who have used j, and
who have personal knowledge Of its ex-
celence.
Its wonderful popularity. however, has
led interruptions dealers to offer imi.a-
lions which act unsatisfactory. There
fore, when buying. to get its beneficial
effects. always note the full name Of the
Company-C California Fig Syrup Co.
plainly printed on the front Of every
package Of the genuine Syrup Of Figs
and Elixir Of SIENNA.
For sale by all leading druggists. Price
50 cents per bottle.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
A WOMAN DOCTOR
Was Quick to Sec That Coffee Poison
Was Doing tho Mischief.

A lady tells Of a bad case Of coffee
poisoning, and tells it in a way so sim
pie and Straightforward that literary
skill could not improve it.
II had neuralgia headaches for IL
years." she says, land have suffered
untold agony. When / first began to
have them I weighed 40 pounds, but
they brought me down to 10.
Il went to many doctors and they
gave me only temporary relief. So I
suffered on, till one day, a woman
Doctor advised me to drink Postum.
She said I looked like I was coffee
poisoned.
so / began to drink Postum, and
gained Is pounds In the first few
weeks and am still gaining, but not SO
last al at first. My headaches began
TO leave me after / had used Postum
about two weeks-long enough, l ex-
pect, to get the coffee poison out Of
my system.
Now that q few months have pass
ed since / began to use Postum, I al
gladly say that I never know what q
aeuralgic headache is like any more,
and 1t was nothing but Postum that
relieved me.
Before / used Postum I never
vent out alone; I would get bewilder-
ed and would not know which way to
TURN. Now I 60 alone and my head
Is as clear as a bell. My brain and
lerves are stronger than they have
oeeh for years." Name given by
fostum Co., Battle Creek, Mich.
There's a reason" and 1t is explain.
pa In the little book, "The Road to
MELVILLE" in pkgs.
Ever read the shove letter. A new
Sne appears from time to time. They
ne genuinss true. and full Of humans
Atefest
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
SHOP GIRL GETS MlsER's 100000 900
Aged Customer in Jest Pencils Will On
Cuff and Then Dies.

" tuCT DicSs
Budapest Correspondence Of New York
World.
Miss Ilona Yards of this city has be-
come a multl-millionaire by an accident
that caused the death OF ar admirer be-
Iore ne. had time to change a cuff on
which Ire had scrubbed his will as a joke.
Iona was a shopgirl in a fancy goods
store. An elderly man named Kronyi OF
Shabby appearance, was her constant
customer, and often sympathizcd with her
because her work was hard. One day he
was more sympathetic than usual, and
said:
For reward you shall have all my
money when l die. 1 am an old bachelor
and have managed to save a Bit"
AS the other girls behin the counter
laughed at the idea Of his having any
money to leave he turned down his cheap
paper cuff and wrote:
II appoint Ilona Yards my sole heir.
After my death she is to inherit all my
estate, real and PERSONAL"
Then he signed and dated this impromp-
tn will, laughed heartily at his own little
joke, shook hands with Ilona and left the
store.
While crossing the street just outside
the store he narrowly escaped being run
down by a car, had a fit from fright and
died In a chemists shop a quarter of an
hour after he had scrubbed on his cuff.
1t turned out that Kronyi had left more
than GO, 900, 900 guiden $3.50, 900, 1000. Ilona
got a lawyer to file her claim TO the
fortune in the probate court Of this city.
Kronyi's relatives fought hard to have
this last Of his wills set aside, but the
Judge decided in favor of Ilona. She got
the whole estate, but gave one-third of 1t
to kronyi's brother.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
BeIated Information.

Albert Morris Bagby was being con.
graduated at the Waldorf-Astoria in
New York on the success Of his "mu-
steal mornings"
81 impute my success" he said, ito
the fact that l engage 40 talent that I
don't know thoroughly. In entertain
ment, as in matrimony, knowledge is
most important"
Then Mr.. Bagby smiled and said:
1.-TWO ladies were talking the other
day about the Chinese revolution. The
Younger lady said:
isn't 1t dreadful in China? A won.
an doesn't know her husband till she
marries him.
THE other lady. a divorcee, answer.
ed bitterly:
81 didn't know my husband till ]
married him. either" st. Louis
Globe Democrat.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Didn't Surprise Mrs. Flynn.

Dennis Flynn, while returning from
work, took refuge under a tree during
a thunder storm. The tree was struck
by lightning and Dennis vas blown
some twenty feet away by the concus.
sion and badly stunned. A neighbor
found Dennis and began the work OF
resuscitation; another hurried to the
home OF Dennis to inform Mrs. Flynn
Of the accident. Mrs. Flynn listened
to the neighbours account Of the acct.
dent with mingled terror and Joy, and
when told that her husband was not
much hurt and would soon be home,
her pleasure was gratifying to behold
AN Dinnis was twinty fate away,
did yez say?" About that. yes
Och, my Dennis always was quick on
his fate" said Mrs. Flynn, with a
proud shake of her head.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Puzzle Of Llvfnu.

Religionists chided about their ina.
bility to agree on points Of faith might
point out that they differ only In Incl.
dentals and not essentials, whereas
the scientists differ on everything.
Take the science Of living. A week
ago you would have died If you drank
water with your meals" Now they
say 1t doesn't do any harm at all. One
variety says: Eat meat, lots Of 1t, to
build good, rich blood" Another says
meat is poison; that vegetables are
the only food. A third declares meat
and vegetables both increase debility,
and that you will live twice as long
on raw fruits and nuts. Some say
Talk with your meals. laugh; 1t
makes the food digest" Others insist
silence is lever SO golden as at the
table.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
A Lesson for the Times.

ASAA = SAeo 80
The civil war was a long and pro-
tracted struggle because 1t takes two
years to convert armed mobs into
armies, and until that conversion Is
complete there can be no decisive scien-
tifc military action. 1t was, indeed.
fortunate for the United States that in
this war its antagonist also began OPP
erations with an armed mob instead OF
al army
Our analysis Of the facts Of the civil
war has thus far led us to two i'm
portant conclusions; first, that efforts
to prevent 1t ~judicially were vain, and,
second, that the undoubtedly proxi-
tary unpreparedness Of the United
States. 1t may now be interesting to
consider to what extent the situation
might have been modified II our states
men had included sound military insti-
tutions in our political system. From
h beginning Of the government there
had been two distinct schools Of opin-
ion on military policy. One Of these
schools included men like Washington
and Hamilton, who were none the less
good citizens because they also hap
pened to be trained soldiers. The
statesmen Of this school advocated pre-
~paredness for war as the only effective
insurance Of peace, and pointed out
that the military Of a nation
oAAAA w q ~ "oA eAa'~eo
they are at least partially organized in
time Of peace. The other school Of
military opinion was led by men like
Mr.. Jefferson, who, with no knowledge
Of the facts Of war, preferred to substi-
tute a speculative vision for the re-
suits Of experience. Most Of u states
men have taken their place in one Or
the other Of these schools. The school
Of Washington has included all of
public men whose military opinions
have rested upon any basis Of military
information, but the school of Jefferson
has always been more numerous and
influential.
In laying their plans for ar appeal to
arms, the southern leaders knew that
the war against them would be con-
Quoted by the methods of Jefferson and
not by the methods of Washington.
They were able to accept odds Of -four
to one because they knew that the war
u Of the north were not in ne
gCffahle form.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Natural Avoidance.

Mayor Gaynor of New York was de-
Tending his anti-suffrage views:
Woman has her place and man has
his" he said, land when I think Of
the confusion that would come; from
intermingling their places, l am re-
minded of an anecdote about Lady
Holland. Lady Holland once said to
Lord John RUSSELL Why hasn't Lord
Holland got a post in the cabinet?'
Well, If you must know Lord John
answered, 1t is because nobody would
work in a cabinet with a mar whose
wife opens all his letters"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Mice on Trains.

I'm my last trip across the continent
I met a man who showed me a hither-
to unsupported danger Of sleeping
cars a travelling man said. THE first
night out from Denver he occupied the
berth across the aisle from mine.
Shortly after everybody had turned In
for the night I heard him fussing
around. I looked out. He had baited
an old-fashioned mousetrap with
cheese and was leaning out to set 1t
on the floor under his berth.
along in the night I thought 1
heard the trap click The next morning
I got upSahead Of my neighbor to
watch his maneuvers with the mousse
trap. I felt kind Of creepy when I saw
him pick up the trap with a dead mouse
dangling from the wire moose. Later |
expressed establishment at my neigh
BORIS bagging that kind of game on a
transcontinental train.
"'Oh, that's nothing said he. u
ratch a mouse about every other night
In seasons when I am on the road
most Of the time. I don't know where
they make their nests. but there are
few Of the ordinary coaches that dc
not carry their share OF mice
"In Chicago I bought a scent
mousetrap of my own, and set II or
the way home, but ] didn't catch 9
mouse"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
A Beautiful Decline.

Ollie James, the gigantic and genial
congressman and senator-elect from
Kentucky, was in conversation the
other day with a Washingtonian when
the latter made certain inquiries with
reference to a mutual friend whom he
had not seen for a number of years.
And how does Col. Prescott spend
his declining years." he asked.
Beautifully, sir; beautifully" an.
swered James. He has a fine farm,
sir. A string of trotters, sir. And a
barrel Of whisky 16 years old-and a
wife of the same age, sir!"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Modern Education and Old.
E&-p~n SarihnArso Mouarsna

How Ices the rising generation COM
pare educationally with its predeces-
sors? How do American men n
women compare educationally with
those Of Europe? What has been the
effect of modern Industrial fortunes on
the minds and tastes of that portion Of
our community which enjoys the best
opportunities for education? Do the
material distractions OF the present day
tend to diminish individual culture?
These corollaries from Josephine's
and my discussion concerning the in
iuence Of the really rich on the socially
attractive young were ~propounded by
me at the next meeting Of my dinner
club. The questions were scarcely out
of my mouth before DR.. Henry Mere
dith, h eminent specialist on diseases
of the nerves, a man still in his prime
though past 60, and an incisive reason
er on n topic, started off with a
pungent fuency which suggested that
here was a subject IN which he had
been longing to air very concerto opin-
ions.
1.-THE young men and women Of to-
day on the educational side? / am out
Of conceit of them. Well set-up, ath-
letic, good looking, young fellowship
girls, too, even better looking and just
as good Fellowship do thoroughly
and efficiently what they set out to do.
I'm no quarreling with their brains OF
their executive ability. It's their APP
palling ignorance concerning the things
which every educated person ought to
know; which every educated person in
nv day did know. lave you ever
tested them on literature? They own
up to Kipling and Stevenson; but what
of the rest? Are they intimate-as we
were 40 years ago-with their Shakes
peare, their bible. their ancient clas-
sizes, their Gibbon? It's not erudition
- -- " H. ~ -
Thomas a Kempis or Sir Thomas More,
but to the primary essentials. Intimate
I repeat. Ask, offhand, the average
man or woman Of your acquaintance
under IS, What Is the story Of Jeph-
tha's daughter Where exactly do
you fndl the lines There Is a tide in
the affairs Of men which taken at the
flood leads on to fortune"?"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Modern Methods,

The late A. Tennyson Dickens, dur.
ing an interview in Chicago, condemn.
ed the war in Tripoli vehemently.
Slavery" he said, with a bitter
smile, lis now abolished. We no long
er steal a people and sell them into
bondage. No, no, indeed. We just
steal their country and charge them
SO much for governing it that they
have to work twice as hard as slaves
to pay their taxes"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Evidence.

What makes you think our great
public men don't work as hard as
they used TOT"
by the photographs" replied
Farmer C%orntossel. when I was a
young Teller the big men in politics
didn't take near as much time to git
shaved and have their hair cut"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
BIissfui ignorance.

Have you seen Joe lately?"
why. yes; I saw the old chap yes
terday. And, what do you Think
he's going to be married."
Can 1t be possible? To whom?"
Hes going to marry Mary Merrie."
What! Why, l didn't know they
knew each other"
"They don't. That's why they're 60
ing to be married"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
LANGUAGE.

"A poet speaks of himself as a
blind voyager across the bitter
seas"
Perhaps an overindulgence in fancy
food has given him an acute sensa-
ton of NAL de mer."
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Wheat O Down,

De Broker-Hear about De Curbb?
De Ledger-No. What's happened
to him?
De Broker-Knocked fiat.
De Ledger-You don't say? Was
he caught by the drop in wheat?
De Broker-Well, yes; something
like that. A barrel of -four fell on
him.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Fairy Story.

They married and lived happily
ever after"
you forget that you r talking
about two people on the stage"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Hard to Find.

Here are some verses entitled,
The Road to Already"
"Pshaw! Almost any poet can tell
the way to Already. but none of them
ever gets there"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Out Of Date.

Every time he opens his mouth he
puts his foot In It,"
That's a great pity. Contortionists
are no longer In demand as vaudeville
attractions"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
When Your Eyes Need Care

Try Murine Eye Remedy. No Smarting-Feeis
Fine-Acts Quickly Try 1t for Red, Wes.,
Watery Eyes and Granulated Eyelids. Illus
trated Book in each Package. Murine is
compounded by our Oculists-not n up tent Med
iolne" but used In successful Physicians Pnc-
tice for many years. Now dedicated To the Pub
Ito and sold by Druggists At 2Sc and 60c per Bottle.
Murine Eye Salve In Aseptic Tubes, 2Sc and Soc.
Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Use Aliens foot.Ease

The antiseptic powder to be shaken into
the shoes for tired, tender, smarting, ach-
ing, swollen feet. 1t makes your feet feel
easy and makes walking a Delight. Sold
everywhere, 25c. For free trial package,
address Allen s. Olmsted, lie Roy, n. Y.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

For liver and kidney troubles, nothing is
quite go mild, pleasant and effective as
Garfield Tea.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
Vivid ~lmaoinstion.

"Dufflns says a pill looks as large
him as a golf ball"
THAT being the case, l don't see
how he ever manages TO eat green
peas"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Mrs. Wfnslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teethinR, softens the gums, reduces inhamma.
ton, allays pain. cures wind collie, Csc q bottle.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Many a man has bumped into
trouble while trying to dodge his duty.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
AMONG Epfcures.

paris Is q swift town.
That's true, but snails are very
popular there"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

DR.. Pierce's Pellets. small, sugar-coatcd.
easy to take as candy, regulate and invigor-
ate stomach, liver and bowels. Do not gripe.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Garfield Tea, taken regularly, will correc
both liver and kidney disorders.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

If love is really blind how Is 1t tina
love can always find a way?
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

An oculist can do nothing for a man
who Is blind to his own interests.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07
His View.

Tell me about Spain, romantic
Spain"
WELL" said the motorist, there are
a few bad places as you come down
the mountains, but in the main the
roads are pretty good"
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

We can do more good by being good
than In any other way.-Burton.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Two heads are better than one-ir
Q cabbage patch.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

ONLY ONE "BROMO OUININE."
tho signature of u: w. GROVE. Used the World
over 10 Cure n Cold in One Lay. Csc.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

@. PILES CURED IN g TO IL DAYS
Your druggist will refund money If PAZO
MENT fails TO cure any case of Itching, Blind
6leedlnx or Prouudinq Piles inc " ID days. SOC.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Scribbler-What's the best way to
become a great poet?
Ruyter-Write a bunch of junk that
no one can understand.
The Bon Homme County independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1904-1913, 1912-03-07

Color more goods brighter and faster cofors than n
dye any garment without ripping apart. Write
The Washington herald., 1912-03-16
CHARLESTON RESULTS.

FIRST RAcE-Purse 500; naidens. tEoyear
olds four furiongs- YorkTille. lA (ButwslD. Is "a
s. won: Insurance Man. Ill HopkinSl, to l. SEC
ond: Fort Sumter. liz, CwilsOu,. Is to l, third.
Time o5oES George KAnne. Solar Star. Rich
ard Gentry. Rslph Lloyd. MhS Edith. PonkHtas
set. Miss yeIlmA and FalcoRet also
SECOND RACE-SeIling; purSe SO; fouryeHr-
olds and upward; sir furlonc. Union Jack us
(ButveIl. to s. won; npfy, los tSchSeibigl,
to !. sscoud; j. II. Houghton. lis tkoernerl. TO
. third. Time In Is. Minnie Bright. InciSion.
Carroll. Congo. Westpoint, Lord Wells. and SEMI
QuAreT also nm.
THIRD RACE-P,use 500: thresysar-olds and
upward: siI furIongs- MACK B. Euhanks, 90 tCon-
nellyl, L to !. Won: MorTistoNn, % tAmhrusel.
10 2 second: Ella Br5son, Ns CWisonl, II TO l.
third Time 1884. Puck. Holman. Knights
Differ. Leopold. Msxoana. Eastoo. and Lexis also
ran
FOURTH RAcE-ssilinE: purse $50; threeJear-
oIds and upsArd; mile and a quarter. Helene, ss
fNicCahel. to l. won: Royal Report. 100 Turner.
II TO s. second; NadEu. n3 (KocrneTl, IS to 10.
third Time. si5 IS. Lmpet also ran.
FIFTH RACE-SeIling; pure $50; threeyear-
oldS an upward: six furiougs. Sureset. III but
velD. II 10 10. won: Moutclair. IN Iensen,. >
to l. second; Love Watches. Ilo CTurnerl, s To
S. third. Time liz IS HanAck. Thrifty. Sir Ed
ward. Grecian Bend. Knight Deck. and Charley
StrEs also ran.
SIXTH RACE-senins; purSs 500; threeyear
olds and up~Ard; seven frlongN Jacooits, nS
JeusenJ. IL to S won; Bertis, lis Koerne1. to
l. second: Pretent, los Moorsl. to S. third.
Time. la IS. Edna Collins. Rinda, Arbutus,
Jennie Wells. and Golden Treasure also ran
SEVENTH RACE-SeIlng; purse $50; three
yearolds and upward; mile. Roy. 81 uouns-
bsrr5), to /. won; Emily Lee lOl tAmhrusel. .
to !. secood Flying Feet, lM (BoreD. Il to 5.
third Time ls6t5 v. Powers. Wander. Agnar,
Lord Elan. and Footlight also rIn-
The Washington herald., 1912-03-16
From Other Training Camps

Marlin. Tex, March 15.-Manager Nc
Graw, of the New York Nationals, and
two teams OF ball players left here to-
night for Galveston and Houston, where
I they Will meet local teams tomorrow.
McGraw announced to-day that he will
! take his entire string OF youngsters to
New York with him at the close of the
training season. where they viii be given
9 final try-out before the beginning OF
the championship season.
Atlanta, Ga, March 15.-InfeId practice
, was the order OF the afternoon for the
New York Yankees to-day. Manager
Harry wolverton putting them through
two solid hours OF strenuous work, de-
spite the gloomy weather.
The men displayed good form and came
through the practice in championship
shape, Stump and Coleman proving the
stars OF the day with their brilliant work
at third and second.
New ri>Ins. La. March 15.-The PelI-
can ball pkrk resembled a platter Of pea
soup todd, and the game with the. New
Orleans tsam had TO be called on. In
case there is no more rain tonight the
cubs-PeHcan game probably will be
staged tomorrow.
Montgomery. Ala. March I5.-Jim Pas
kert. who came here a hold-out. signed a
contract to-day. 1t has been announced
that the heavy hitting Joe Jackson will
occupy the center garden regularly for
the Maps.
Dallas. Tex, March 15-The White Sox
was jolted, . to !, by Dallas to-day. Each
team got hve hits, but the Giants were
more fortunate in mixing theirs with
stolen bases. Mogridge, who started for
the Sox, worked four innings, during
which he yielded two runs. Jim Scott
then went to the rescue.
Fort Worth, Tex, March 15.-The White
Sox regulars trimmed the Fort Worth
Panthers, II to 2, to-day. Walsh and
Peters worked for the Sox, the former
allowing four hits in the five innings he
worked. Jacques Fournier, who is trying
to learn how to play first base, showed
to good advantage. He accepted all
chances and practically broke up the
game in the first inning. when he lifted
one Of Pitcher Burnett's fast ones over
the center fielder's head with the bases
full and crossed the plate behind three
team mates.