davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1912-11-10
MADE ROOSEVELT WAIT

COLONEL ROOSEVELT, who has made
Kings and Emperors await his pleasure,
was himself made to wait an hour on one
occasion which exasperated him nightly.
President Taft, being a devotee of golf,
might understand and forgive; but Colonel
Roosevelt forgave not if he forgot, which is
doubtful.
1t was when he was President, and near
the end of his term. Colonel Roosevelt had
some dental work to be done, and he made
an arrangement through his aide, the late
Captain Archibald Butt, for an appoint
ment with prominent dental surgeon.
At the appointed time, punctual to the
very minute, the official equipage whirled
up to the marble portico of the fashionable
apartment house where the dentist had his
office. The President alighted and was
ushered into the waiting room of the dentist.
He seated himself on the edge of chair,
ready to catapult himself into the operating
room with his accustomed impetuosity.
Then he waited.
Five minutes passed. The President be-
gan to grow nervous. Six minutes passed.
He consulted his watch repeatedly. Seven
minutes passed.
"But," exclaimed the Colonel, "is it
possible that we have the incorrect timer"
ave are correct by the observatory time
to the second, replied Captain Butt, after
consulting his watch.
More minutes passed, and the President
grew more restless, his impatience doubtless
being increased by the pangs of an aching
tooth. Then Captain Butt gently made in
quiry of an attendant when the dentist
would be in. ooh, he is expected any minute
now." Then some more waiting.
Finally the delay stretched out to an hour,
and Captain Butt got hold of the telephone.
The girl at the other end of the line, sta
toned at the apartment house switchboard,
knew where the dentist was,-oh, yes, in
deed,-he was playing a game of golf at
Chevy Chase. No, she really could not say
when he would be in. Any message?
No, there was not any message; but
flushed individual bolted from the dentists
Office, his silk hat somewhat at an angle, and
sprang into his carriage, which dashed away
to the office of another well known practi-
toner, who gave the distinguished patron
the right of way and kept him as his client
during the remainder of the Colonel's stay
in Washington.
Evening star., 1912-11-10
AGENTS WANTED

SEND NAMES AND ADDRESSES OF TEN
friends and twenty-five cents will send return
mail valuable fountain pen. Reference Citizens Savings
Bank, Washington, D. C. Agents wanted American
Mailing List Association Room 4oj, District National Bank
Building, Washington, ID. c.
Evening star., 1912-11-10
VIRGINIA FARM LANDS

CHOICE VIRGINIA FARMS along the c. s, o. Ry.
As low SIS per Abundant RAINFALL rich SOIL
mild winters, nearby Eastern markets. Write today for
illustrated booklet, Country Life in Virginia. and low
excursion Address X T. Crawey, Industrial Agent,
Chesapeake & Ohio Ry., Room 1910, Richmond, Va
Evening star., 1912-11-10
FARM LANDS

INVESTIGATE THE FERTILE NORTHWEST
United States Excellent land in Minnesota North Dakota
Montana, Idaho Washington and Oregon adjacent TO
Northern Pacific Railway Stay in own home country
home markets, quick aon-close good
neighbors and good schools. Free Government home
stead land which can prove in three years State
land easy decided land low prices and crop
payment plan Write quick for illustrated literature and
information about low fares Say what State interests
you. L. Brcker, General Immigration Agent, 1873 North
ern Pacific Building, SAINT Paul, MINI.
Evening star., 1912-11-10
CORPORATIONS

INCORPORATE YOUR BUSINESS IN ARIZONA
Least Cost Transact business keep books anywhere Pres
ident Soddard former Secretary of Arizona Free Laws
Bylaws and Forms. Reference ANY Eank in Arizona,
Soddard incorporating Company Box Soo rhoenx, Arizona
Evening star., 1912-11-10
MOTION PICTURE PLAYS

We catchy, original sketches. Information book
i" How Write and Sell Stories for Picture Plays, mailed
without charge any address unlimited quantity for free dis
trbuton Picture Paywrighs Clearing House, Denver Colo
Evening star., 1912-11-10
"A WANDERING JEW OF MUSIC

W/HEN your football team broke training
after Thanksgiving and you had DIM
ner and hurrahed for everybody, from the
coach to a certain bulldog with chewed-up
ears, it's more than likely that as each one
got his share of kudos you banged on the
table and roared until the walls rocked:
For he's jolly good fe-eH-osv,
Which nobody can deny
Have you heard what a very old air that
is, and that when you sing it there is some
thing connecting you across all the years
with some of the most exciting events in his
tory? 1t has been a rare adventurer, that
tune, and, like any adventurer of varied
fortunes, it has had several aliases. We
know it as "For he's a jolly good fellow" and
that was the name it sailed under when Cap
tain Cooks band played it as they were
prowling around in the South Seas before
Islands. An old diary says it was the only
air the natives seemed to recognize and en-
JOY.
A peasant woman brought it to the court
of France. She came there as a nurse to that
poor little chap the Dauphin, son of Marie
Antoinette and Louis XVI. 1t was his cradle
song in the palace at Versailles. The air and
the quaint words struck the fancy of the
Queen. She learned them and taught them
to the King. Then everybody sang them,
from the King to the gardener clipping the
hedge. This is about the way it went, as
nearly as it can be given in English. You
can put in the refrain for yourself after the
first two verses:
Malbrouk has gone to the war,
Mironton, Mironton, Mirontaine,
Malbrouk has gone to the war
All, when will he return9
He will be back at Easter,
Mironton, Mironton, Mirontaine,
He will be back at Easter,
Or else at Trinity.
But Trinity is over,
And Mabrouk has not come.
Madame climbed up on her tower,
As high she could go.
She quickly saw her page,
All dressed in deepest black.
My page, my pretty page,
What tidings do you bring?"
THE news bring, fair lady.
Will cause your eyes to weep.
Lay by your rosy gown,
Also your silk brocade.
Monsieur Malbrouk is dead,
Is dead and in his grave.
Il saw him laid in earth
BY four of his command.
"One Captain bore his cuirass
And one his buckler BORE
"One carried his huge sword,
Another naught at all.
And all around his tomb
They planted rosemary.
Upon the topmost branch
The nightingale burst forth
They saw his great soul fly
Up through the laurel boughs.
"All fell upon their breasts,
And then got up again,
ITO chant the victories
That brave Malbrouk had won.
The ceremony over,
They all retired to rest
1t was SO popular in Paris they painted
pictures on fans and screens of Malbrouk's
funeral procession, with the lady looking out
from the tower, the page dressed in black,
and so on. Then came the Revolution, and
the angry people made many savage verses
Evening star., 1912-11-10

1t was SO popular in Paris they painted
pictures on fans and screens of Malbrouk' S
funeral procession, with the lady looking out
from the tower, the page dressed in black,
and SO on. Then came the Revolution, and
the angry people made many savage verses
to be sung to the tune of Malbrouk In her
diary, Maria Theresa, the Dauphin's sister,
wrote that when her unhappy family were
in prison in the Temple, with fear and horror
beside them, they were saddened to hear
fragments of this tune of happier days flung
up to them above the noises of the street.
We have it on authority that Barras sang it;
SO did bloody Maret. Charlotte Corday
must have known it by heart.
Before this, in the reign of Queen Anne in
England, when her great General the Duke
of Marlborough was fogging the French all
over Flanders, fighting the battles of Blen-
helm, Malplaquet, and the rest, soldier of
France, sick of the rain, hungry and weary
of war and wretchedness, changed the name
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
SPEED MANIA is DISASTROUS
Public Has Gone Crazy Over Matter Of
Rushing, Says Traveller, Who
Soon Forsets Himself.

Yes, sir" said the man who had his
feet in a chair in the smoking COM
partment of the car, you can trace
nearly every railroad accident to the
mania for speed. Safety is a sec
ondary consideration. The first OBJ
ject is to get there in a hurry. Look
at the advertisements of the differ.
ent railroads. You'll see that speed is
always emphasized. II one road can
make the run from New York to Chi.
cago in 20 minutes less time than II
takes op some other road the fact is
played up in big type, as II 1t were
the most important thing In the world
The public has gone crazy over this
matter Of rushing. Get there quick is
the great object. We've got to be edu
Gated up to the idea that speed Is not
the only thing which should be con
sidered. The man who thinks his time
Is so important that the gain or loss
OF an hour is vital ought to be chuck
ed into a well and allowed to cool of
Say. porter, how are we running
Seems to me this train Is merely
creeping along"
Yes, sab, We're about 20 minute.
late. The heavy rains have made the
track unsafe along here and we go
to go kind of careful"
"Confound this road, anyhow II
never travel on 1t again Why tn,
dickens can't they get people in oil
time!"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
FLINT LOCKS STILL IN USE
cipal Weapons Of Many Natives
In African Juneles.

Old flin.lock muskets are still the
principal weapons of hordes of natives
over vast tracts Of Africa. The exis-
tence of these ancient arms keeps
alive a steady demand for gun flints,
a demand which is supplied from the
little Norfolk village of Brandon.
where there are flint pits which have
been worked, as remains found estab-
fish, for at least 80 centuries. The
business is hereditary one. Large
masses OF flint are got out of the quar-
ries and then faxed or split (the proc
ess being termed "knapping") in or
der to get at the core, which alone is
used. The workmen place the flint
upon a pad upon their left leg and tap
1t with a short. heavy hammer. Four
fifths of the flint thus dealt with is
waste. but of the remainder gun flints,
carbiDe flints and pistol flints are still
manufactured. while tinderbox fiints
are prepared for the shepherds OF the
remoter parts of Spain and Italy.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
MANY BENEFITS FROM SHEEP
No Kind Of Live Stock That Can Be
Handled More Advantageousiy
With Dry Farming.
ny w. r. STEVENS. Live Stock Com
missioner OF Alberta.)

ny w. r. STEVENS. Live Stock Com
missioner OF Alberta)
There Is no kind of live stock that
can be handled as advantageously in
connection with extensive grain grow
Ing in dry-farming country as can
sheep.
This is due to one fundamental fact
the large number OF weeds that
sheep will eat. OF the 800 grasses and
weeds known in Canada. sheep will
eat 26O. Horses and cattle will eat
only about one-fourth that number.
The most serious problem confront
ing the average grain farmer In West
ern Canada today Is the weed prob
lem. While the weed problem can be
handled by proper cultivation. this
cultivation can be greatly facilitated
by keeping the right kind of animals
on the land, and in addition to solving
the weed problem the productiveness
of the soil will also be maintained
Anything that will destroy weeds ia
worthy of the farmers attention; any.
thing that will maintain the fertility
OF the land demands his attention.
Sheep will do both and are therefore
entitled to the attention of every
grain grower in dry-farming country
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
Overhead irrigation.

Many gardeners using cold frames
for the forcing of early summer crops
have found the overhead system of ir
rigation very practical. Instead OF
placing the pipes several feet above
the frames they are usually placed
very close to the frames and in some
Instances on the inside Of the side
boards. This method Of irrigation
greatly reduces the cost OF watering
and secures more equal distribution OF
the water than usually occurs by hand
watering. When using this system II
ls always better to water thoroughly
and then refrain from applying more
water until 1t Is actually needed.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
PATIENCE OF A LITTLE BOY
Affecting Little Story Is Told By
Lady Somerset Of London Youths
Remarkable Courage.

Lady Henry Somerset, whose labors
in behalf of the children of the Lon
don slums are constant and earnest
says the Youths Companion, tells this
affecting story OF the way in which
her interest in these little ones was
aroused:
l was moved in that direction by
the rare patience and imagination OF
one little boy His example convinced
me that patience was one OF the
qualities | needed most, and In seek
ing 1t grew into that work.
was In hospital on visiting day
while the doctors were changing 9
plaster cast which held the crippled
boys limb The operation was ex
ceedingly painful. was told To my
surprise the little sufferer neither
stirred nor WINGED. but made a curl
Gus buzzing sound with his mouth
After the doctors left said to him:
How could you possibly stand it,
That's nothing" he answered
why, Just made believe that a
bee wac stingin' me. Bees don't hurt
very much. you know And kept
buzzin because | was afraid I'd for
get about its being bee II didn't
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
Still Had Homes.

What was your sons social stand
ing In Gollege?"
oh, tery fair, Why, he almost got
into thesGibber and Squeak society"
'Indetd How was that?"
WHY, you know, they always hit
them on the back as sign they have
been selected, and George was hit on
the back with such force that 1t knock
ed him DOWN"
Mercy"
Yes, indeed. He thought, of course,
he had heen chosen, but he found out
afterward 1t was the class bully who
hit him because he didn't like the set
of his collar But even that's a great
honor"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
TINE
CHILDREN
E -z-zff7
I@&SSR' StG93 |
USEFUL LITTLE POCKET BOOK
Knife, Pins, Needles, Notebook, Pencil
Sharpener and Other Articles
In Combination.

One Of the most complete combina-
ton articles ever put on the market is
the pocket box designed by PennsyL
vania man. This compact and aston
ishing little device includes a pen
Knife, pencil sharpener, notebook, pin
cushion. nail clip and several other
necessary things. The continuance is
abot the size and shape of a large
match box. In slide along one side
is knife blade, which, by means OF
projection extending through the
slot, may be thrust out when needed
and replaced when not in use. Part
of the box is a lid. on the bottom OF
which is fastened leaves of blank
paper, forming a writing pad or note
book. Beneath this lid is a padded
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
BUCKING A GIANT MONOPOLY
Man With Bullying Brow Relates Em
esedinsIy Interesting Expert
ence He Had With lceman.

.,
"u an in'eles'ihs experience
go 49, 'oe"n o'ne' inV' ms
~ -. nnan "''h 'he ouisihs o'o"
"n,eu you " pay ioi sou'
epon oooA lore ne ie' you hA'o
w., - e' ,ecAon' uaNa'ueu INC
a an WIN 'ne DUBIOUS nose
sc, 'i'ar' roi 'ons '.o'
-, INV We peen suSpeo.ine 'na'
- ~ eiNe iae iuii "eien' s s
e.. ~, 10 ZANE TINS time ! was 'e Eau
: 20 ne hau pu. VIVA. NC .a,e
pounu ehuuh III 'he ooA, anu was
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
His Bid.

Yorkshireman recently entered
an auction mart. Looking around
and catching the auctioneer's eye
during lull in the bidding, he shout.
ed out loudly enough to be heard by
all:
May bid?"
Certainly" said the man Of the
hammer. thinking him customer.
All eyes being turned on the GUS
toner, he, making for the door, said:
We'll. bid you goodnight, then"
The laughter which followed stop
ped business for some time-Tit-
Bits.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
BLOWING A CARD FROM PIPE
Nothing Would Seem to Be More Sim
ple-PecuIiar Principle Of Aero
dynamics Involved.

At first thought, nothing would seem
shipper than blowing card off from
a pipe, II the card is laid horizontally
on the bowl of 1t and one blows
through the pipe stem; but when one
tries II, he is amazed to find that he
cannot do it. says the Popular Mechan
les. In order to make the expert
ment satisfactorily. pin should be
put through the card into the bowl OF
the pipe. SO that 1t cannot slide side
wise. Under these conditions, the
card cannot be blown from the
pipe except OCCASIONALLY by very
sudden puff
The uncanny fact that the card can
not be blown from the pipe depends
upon some of the peculiar principles
of aerodynamics. One would feel Ger
tain that, when he blows, the card
would fly Immediately into the air. II
will be noticed though, that the col
umn of air which ascends is only as
large as the bowl of the pipe. while
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
WATER SUPPLY ON DRY FARM
Plant for Average Home Need Not Be
Elaborate or Extensive to
Be Convenient.

Thy PRoF T. S KEENE. Dean Of Engi-
necring. North Dakota Agriculture,
College,
An adequate and well arranged
water supply system contributes to
the comfort and well being of the
family to greater measure than any
other form of household conven-
fence. Such a system not only dshtens
the burden of household drue>sery. but
adds UNNECESSARILY TO the content
ment Of those who enjoy its service.
When there is added TO the conven-
ence of such plant that of system
Df sewage disposal, the equipment OF
the suburban or country residence be-
comes as complete as can be obtained
where city water supply and sewer
service is available. That plants OF
this kind are in general use is mat
ter of common knowledge, and that
they are successful in service Is at
tested by the number Of companies en-
gagged in their manufacture.
| A water supply plant for the aver
age home need not be elaborate or
expensive In order to be convenient.
The water may be taken from any
suitable source of supply, and the
plant may be made to suit the avail
able conditions. no matter what they
may be.
The system Is simple Nm construc-
ton not at all difficult TO operate. and
contains all of the essentials neces'
sary to the demands of the average
home.
The source OF supply Is a rain water
cistern sunk below the level Of the
basement floor, the top of which ex
tends above the level Of the floor. The
water Is pumped from the cistern by
a common tank pump and forced into
the pressure tank. where 1t furnishes
a supply of water as desired. The tank
Is an upright cylinder made perfectly
tight and constructed to withstand the
necessary pressure required to per-
form Its service. 1t may be galvanized
as a precaution against rust, but this
Is not absolutely necessary.
The pipe which conveys the water
from the pump enters the tank near
the bottom, and as the water enters
the contained air is compressed into
; the decreasing space above It's sur.
lace. The pressure developed by the
compressed air furnishes the force by
which the water is driven out of the
tank and through the distributing
pipes as the supply is demanded Il
the air of the tank when empty of wa
, ter is compressed until 1t occupies one
half of Its original volume, then thu
' pressure will be twice the origina
Z pressure, which In this case will b
about Is pounds to the square incl
q The higher the water rises In tn
tank the greater will be the pressur
q developed This may be as high as II
pounds to the square inch II occasio
l. requires, but 40 pounds pressure
q generally suffi Client for all the requir'
ments usually demanded In a hous
plant.
The plant is relatively inexpensive
d simple to operate and gives the hous
d 1 supply Of water that furnishes ever
Q necessary convenience. Modification
/. may be made to suit any condition O
y size, location or source OF water SUI
ply
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21

When may man call his wife hon
ey?" When she has large comb In
her head.
Who was the first TO swear in this
world? Eve. How so? When Adam
asked her If he might take a kiss. she
said, don't care A dam II you do.
How can 1t be proved that a horse
has six legs? He has fore legs in
front and two behind
Why is gun like a jury? Because
1t goes of when discharged.
What is that II you use it well will
look at everybody; but If you scratch
its back 1t will look at nobody? A
looking glass.
Why had Eve no fear Of the
measles? Because shed Adam
(had-em).
At what age should q man marryi
At the parsonage.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
English, You Know.

81 shall discharge our butler"
said Mr.. Cumrox.
whats the trpuble?"
HE doesn't show me proper def
erence. When am paying a man
literally, consider 1t his duty to
laugh at my jokes"
And he WON'T"
81 don't think he can. He's an
English butler When, in spirit OF
gentle and condescending badinage,
said to him: Hawkins, can you tell
me which came first. the chicken or
the egg? he said; Which did you or.
der first, SIR"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21

Il should like very much" said the
president of the greatest republic on
which the sun ever shown, ito appoint
you to an Office Of some kind, but you
must realize, of course, that 1t Is nee
essary for me to reward our party
workers before ! take up the cases Of
other applicants"
Certainly l realize that. I'm ont
of the party workers you refer to-"
"Oh, are you? What have you dom
for the ticket?"
Il was one OF the people who howl
ed for SO minutes when your nam'
was presented to the convention"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
MAKING Sure.

A commercial traveller at rail,
way station In one of our Southern
towns included In his order for
breakfast two boiled eggs. The old
darkey who served him brought him
three
Uncle" said the travelling man
why in the world did you bring me
three boiled eggs? only ordered
two"
Yes, sir" said the old darkey
bowling and smiling. 81 know you
did order two, sir. but brough
three, because I Just naturally fell
dat one Of dem might. fail you. sir.
-Harpers Weekly
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
Profit Ilea In Seed Bed.

There are few farms on which ad.
ditional labor expended in preparing
the seed bed would not yield hand
some returns. 1t costs about Is cents
per acre to harrow land and about IS
cents per acre to disk land. For one
dollar land can be double disked and
narrowed twice. One bushel Of wheat
or barley, two bushels Of corn. or one
half bushel of fax. increase per acre
will pay for this extra labor.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
Card Cannot Be pIsIodaed

the surface Of the card which Is ex
pected to be lifted is many times
greater. AS soon as the card rises a
little. the downward pressure holds
1t to such an extent that the air flows
out sidewise In every direction along
its surface. When 1t gets to the
Blow Ever So Long and Hard. the
edge Of the card, 1t draws some OF
the air from the upper side with It
This causes current of air from
above to descend upon the card and
to hold 1t down.
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
His WINNING peIiuerY.

And how is your excellent son. the
divinity student? He graduated from
the theological seminary about a
year ago, believer"
Yes, just year ago. And he's
doing so Well They pay him a
wonderful large salary. and next
year he's to get more"
'1ndeed' That's very unusual. Per.
haps it is his excellent delivery that
nets him this large emolument?"
yes, that's It. He's one OF the
pitchers in the big league"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21
He Had an Explanation.

A committe had the State Senator
on the carpet.
Didn't you promise, II we elected
you. to get our county good roads,"
"Why, certainly, gentlemen"
did you do it?'
mo. You see airships are getting
very common now. | thought we'd
better wait few years. Maybe we
won't need any roads at all then.
Fine weather for corn, isn't it?"
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1912-09-21

surface for pins. needles, etc. At one
end of the box is an opening large
enough to admit lead pencil and
equipped with sharpening knife in
side, while the nail clip is operated by
the lid of the box, which works on a
spring. With a change of linen and
undergarments and one of these boxes
man might travel round the world.