Smyrna times., 1912-07-03
The Man
That Figured
By M QUAD
Copyright. 1912. by Associated Lit.
erary Press.
By M QUAD

IL was May day when the man
that gave his name as Ezekiel Harper
arrived in the village of Oakville and
told the landlord of the tavern that he
wanted rest and might stay for cou-
pie of months.
At the end of three weeks the village
constable, the justice of the peace, the
leading merchant and others had a sort
OF meeting at which it was resolved
that a stranger that wouldn't tell all
about himself was probably hiding
from the law. This resolution was
handed to Mr. Harper by the constable.
and after reading it two or three times
the newcomer carelessly said:
Il kinder want a rest and 1 kinder
want to fgger something out"
"But we don't like it. We don't like
it" announced the man of the law.
well. | dunno what you are going to
do about it,
Neither did the constable nor any
body else, Mr.. Harper paid his board
every Saturday night in good and law
full money, and if he was a fugitive
from justice he didn't do any skulking.
Soon after he had been told what the
| public thought of him he bought a
tape line at one of the stores. OF course
the clerk that sold it to him asked him
what he was going to do with it, but
Mr.. Harper refused to give out any in
formation whatever. This nearly re-
suited in another public meeting. But
for the fact that the man was seen
measuring the distance from the school
house to the bridge the meeting would
have been held and at least three diff
ferent resolutions adopted
And the next day Mr. Harper meas
ured the distance between the tavern
and a mudhole a hundred feet away.
A day elapsed. 1t was spent by Mr..
Harper in figuring. and he took great
care that his figures should not be seen
by others. Deacon Smythe had al
ways had great good luck in pumping
strangers. and he was called upon to
exercise his talents on the man of mys-
terry. He took a seat beside him on the
tavern veranda and began:
"Mr. Harper, this town of Oakville
is inhabited by plain people,"
yes"
''We have nothing to conceal"
"N-o."
"Then / shall expect you to answer
few questions concerning yourself
Where do you come from2"
II believe they call the place Hades
row, but that hasn't changed the tenn
perature anyY'
'Slrl Sir! This to meg' shouted
Deacon Smythe.
please don't bother mel want to
ngger."
When 1t became known how Deacon
smythe had been turned down that
second public meeting was held. The
resolutions we're bold and red hot The
landlord must give Mr.. Harper notice
to quit. He must also make oath as
to what suspicious things he had OBJ
served. Mr.. Harper must tell why he
5 came to Oakville instead of stopping
at Mount Ivy. He must also make d
clean breast of the tapeIine and meas
, uring affair If not But he must
The committee named proceeded to tn,
hotel and reached the place just as
Mr.. Harper returned from measuring
the distance between the cooper shoI
e and the frog pond
, "Sirw said the undertaken, who wa!
= chairman by virtue of having thu
| deepest voice 1--WE must know al
!. quences. For one thing the Landlord
will turn you out"
c Then he'll get a suit for damages!
was the reply.
But, sir, it is a consensus Of opinio
> that you are a-a"-
y Suspicious character2"
o "Yes-ah-yes. Yes, sir. that is it."
Thanks. Tomorrow l will begin sui
e against each and every one of you"
y That shot told. The committee lef
N and the landlord had nothing TO say
t. and for three days men shivered whe
q they thought of damage suits. The
= Mr.. Harper packed his trunk and lef
q, In leaving be placed a written e.
m PLANTATION in the landlords hands to
s. read to all interested parties. 1t rea
as follows:
'EThe distance from the schoolhous
to the bridge is just 209 feet and
inches. What l was figuring on ws
the distance it would be if about fort
old soakers and lazybones in this tow
had to let whisky alone and go
work.
''The distance between the taveI
and the mudhole down the stree
which has been a mudhole for for
WI wars Is inst ninety-seyen feet al