davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
VERY MoDIsH, YEsl

st. Louis. July IA waist
and skirt which snap together
like the fastening of a glove and
a one-piece union suit" Is the
proper raiment for women, ac-
cording to Mrs. Lillian Stuart. of
this city.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

Philadelphia is surrounded by beautiful
suburbs which can be viewed at the rate
of cents a mile on all railroads. II Is
less than 100 miles from New York. which
laughs at II. and is always alluding IN
some manner to its sSeepiness- However.
the Philadelphia now retorts that It Is
never asleep around second base. and
this remark can be guaranteed to pro-
duce apoplexy in New York man in
FIVE seconds or money refunded.
Copyright, 1872 By George Matthew AfAnAl
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

According to the average woman, men
are selfish, lazy. Incorporate. irresponsi-
bic. Jealous. Indifferent. conceited, and
vain. but outside Of that that are "all
right"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

In Prussia an average OF ffty-four
pupils is allotted to a teacher In the
cities, and sixty-one in the rural dis
tricts. The State district OF Potsdam
has eishty-two schools reporting do or
more pupils to . te9chas
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

The estate of some siO.OOo.ocO left by q
Fall River cotton manufacturer is a sure
Indication that our tariff on cotton yields
at least a reasonable profit" to Ameri.
can industry.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

There was q falling of Of $4,000 In
the revenue for the manufacture OF bee,
in Minnesota last year. What was it.
Whisky?
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

Judge Archibald will fare poorly in tn,
Senate, unless he has more friends Their,
than in the House.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

Nick Longworth has the making of 6
good diplomat Thus far he has avoided
taking sides with his strenuous father.
in-law.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

One very deplorable result of the hot
wave is that 1t affected a poor devil Of a
headline writer who has this to say:
sizzling Cities sweltering swarms."
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

Every university ought to turn the cold
shoulder to the gilded youth who would
treat it merely as a winter resort.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
Constant Dfscord.

"How's things at your boarding-houseT
VERY inharmonious. We've got four
kinds of Republicans and three kinds OF
Democrats. to say nothing of those who
favor the bull moose party"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

DOC, can I live much longer?'
Not with your present mode Of life"
ITS tough to go at sixty"
You could live to be a hundred II you
really wanted to-"
How. doc? Tell me how"
BY living in the Balkans on fermented
buttermilk."
Il knew there was a catch In it FIX
me UP TO last another year in dear old
and I'll ask no more"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
July II in History.

July II. 15A-Henry VII gets dissatis-
fed with the umpire at the ball game, and
has him beheaded on the field.
July II, 1620-Isaac Walton Is nipped by
q swapping turtle.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
Uncle Pennywi.s SAYS
Enough Said.

state it In all kindness. but no girl
splits prettily.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

why is womhat no longer for the
third partyf"
He has . job now"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
ALITTLE NONSENSE.
= MEAN MAN.

A MEAN MAN.
1T want to 70 to the Thousand Isiss. !"
Quoth Mrs. Nagg one day.
Hsr hubby met the plan with smiles
And said he'd gladly pay.
Go TO the Thousand Isles." he said,
start right away, my peach.
Here II your fare; go right ahead
And spend q week on each.
Uncle Pennywiss says,
I state It In all kindness. but no sirl
spits prettiiy.
why il womhat no longer for the
third party7"
He has . job now"
July II in History.
July II, i5A-Henry VIII gets dissatis-
fed with the umpire at the ball game, and
has him beheaded on the field.
July II, 162o-Isaac Walton Is nipped BY
q swapping turtle
Try IL.
How are you spending your vacationf'
In an ideal way. I'm pleased nearly
all the time"
That Is rare. What 10 your method!
IT spend two days In the country. then
I'm glad to get back to the city. 1 spend
tvs days In the city, then I'm glad TO
get back to the country. It's a great
scheme"
Going to joint
What Is this bawl
That now breaks loose?
It's the party call
OF the big bull moose.
Got the Habit.
why does your wife make these pecu-
liar motions7'
"As q girl. she was leader In num-
Der Of fy-swatting crusades. She was
q champion iy-swatter before she mar
died me and settled down"
Constant Dfscord.
"How's things at your boarding-hous
VERY inharmonious. We've got four
kinds Of Republicans and three kinds Of
Democrats, to say nothing Of those who
favor the bull moose party"
True to His Town.
Doc, can I live much longer?''
Not with your present mode Of life"
IT'S tough TO 60 at sixty"
You could live TO be a hundred II you
really wanted to"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17
Try IL.
Got the Habit.

why does your wife make these pecu-
liar motions?''
"As q girl. she was leader In num-
Der of fiy-swatting crusades. She was
champion fy-swatter before she mar
died me and settled down"
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

From the Springfield Republican.
Gov. Wilson. since the convention. ha.
been passing through the bouquet period
He must prepare right away for the
brick period.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

Go to the Thousand Isles" he said
Start right away, my peach.
Here u your fare: 60 right ahead
And spend q week on each.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

The testator who made his will In
fourteen words reduced to a minimum the
opportunities for the invalidation OF II
by law.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

IT want to 70 to the Thousand Isles. !"
Quoth Mrs. Nagg one day.
Her hubby met the plan with SMILES
And said he'd gladly pay.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

From the 81. PAM PiousT Pres
Even the teachers can't elect a presi-
dent this year without making faces at
each other.
The Washington herald., 1912-07-17

From the Philadelphia Evening Telegraph.
What shall it profit an American soldier
to become immune to the 1sthmian cli-
mate II he is to be shot by a Panama
policeman?
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
LACKBUR

Don T. Fowler, deputy sheriff,
was here Thursday eve and took
Slick" a negro. to Marsha I and
locked him up. He shot Bill FISH
er, another negro, at Mt. Leonard
a few days ago.---Burglirs W re
In town Thur shay night. They
broke the screen on the back door
OF T. w. Davis residence. entered
his bed room took his pants to the
dining room md h lped ,hemseiv. 8
to his pocket book, contsi,ing S.,
without awakening any one, and
he did not know OF his loss until
he started to put on his clothes
when he could not find his pants.
They also robbed Meyers AMI
Beckmann's chewing gum and
peanut machin s.---Sa.u diy at
noon Fred Rubelmann who lives
next door, discovered that the resi-
dence OF Ms NJ. Z. Fitzpatrick had
broken into and up n inves-
tigation II was found that the
house had been thoroughly ran
sacked, but the only things missed
was some clothing owned by r.
W. Davis. No one was at home
as Mrs. Fitzpatrick Is In Kansas
City visiting her daughter and Mr..
Fitzpatrick was In the country
Record.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Shocking Sounds

in the earth are sometimes heard
before a terrible earthquake, that
warn of the coming peril. Natures
warnings are kind. That dull
pain or ache in the back warns you
the Kidneys need attent on II you
would escape those dangerous ma
ladies, Dropsy, Diabetes or b lights
disease. Take Electric Bitters at
once and e baekache fly and all
your best feelings return. my
son received great benefit from
their use for kidney and bladder
trouble writes Peter BoDdy, South
lockwood, Mich, 1t is certainly
. great kidney medicine" Try IL.
SOC at p. II. Franklin's, Druggist.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
MIAMI

A farm hand in the employ OF
Mrs. Tina Resented OF the upper
bottom decided to decamp Sun
day afternoon with some jewelry
and valuables from the RosenfeId
home. The loss was discovered
and a number OF the neighbors
made a search for the hand. He
was located in a corn field where
he had attempted to hide and
captured All OF the missing
articles we're found in his possess
sion. The culprit, a stranger
in that vicinity, recently went TO
the Rosenfeld home seeking work
and was given employment
VIII Haynie lost n of a bunch
OF nine sheep by lightning Tues
day afternoon. The sheep We're
in the orchard near the house at
the time the N was killed. Mr..
Haynie considers himself fortu-
n~ate'that nor OF the other sheep
were killed as they usually
huddle close during a rain.---
Quite number OF wells are be-
ing drilled in the Sharon neigh
borhood and agood flow OF water
lis being obtained in most OF
them at depth OF less than a
hundred feet. Miami News.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
SWEET SPRINGS

Z. ID. Simmons and Miss Flora
Lange were married at Sedalia
Tuesday. Wednesday they return
ed to Sweet Springs where they
have purchased a home and will
reside permanently.---whi A.
II. killion was unloading wheat
from a wagon Saturday after
noon, the team started suddenly
throwing Mr.. Killion to the
ground, f%racturing his left arm
at the elbow. -Houston:an. -
Mr.. Walter Tay.or will have charge
of the dry goods and clothing de-
partment OF The Smith stores Co. /;
Mr.. Joe Henley. Will have charge
OF the shoe and Gents furnishing
department; Mr.. George Smith
will have charge OF the hardware
department; Messrs. C. X. Smith
and Fred Eisen will have charge
OF the furniture department /;
Messrs. Arthur Mueller and Jno.
Rembert will have charge OF the
grocery and meat department Mr..
will have charge OF the
tin shop and tin work and Mr..
E. W. Kennedy, who is an xper-
plumber, will have charge
Of the plumbing and steam fitting
department.-Sweet Springs Her
aid.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
A Peculiar Fish

X. NJ. Hickory Dick, Robertson
OF warrensburg Is a guest at Nc
Allister Springs, and has been
spending much OF his time fish
ing with trot lines In Blackwater.
Monday night Mr.. Robertson,
assisted by one OF the men en-
ployed at the hotel, was batting
one of the trot lines. They had
a lantern in the boat with them
and had almost finished batting
m OF the lines.
Suddenly a monster fish, at
trasted by the lantern light
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
He Won't Limp Now

No more limping for Tom Moore
OF Cochran, Ga. u had a bad sore
on my instep that nothing SEEM
ed to help till ! used Bucklen's Ar
MICA Salve," he writes, "but this
wonderful healer soon cured me.n
Heals old, running sores, ulcers,
boiis, burns, cuts, bruises, eczema
or piles. Try II. Only 25 cen-at
p. H. Franklin's.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
CHATTER xI.
The Last Race.

w -8@ .S AI
Say. Floyd. got q spare IRE en-
tinguisher In your campi"
II guess So" called a gay ripping
voice cross the gray dawn mist.
"Just throw II into the next pit,
then; Jacks whistling again."
A tousIed head appeared from the
third In the row Of repair pits.
LET Floyd alone, he'd rather hear
me whistle than you talk" jeered the
offender. Besides, he's working. II
It true. Floyd. that you can make .
WORKOUT tazicab motor run like q new
ign snsinst Some one told mo
why, yes, Jack; but I haven't any
time to Ak your car now" came the
sweet reply. "Come crank tho Msr.
curry for me, n Of you. I want to
hear her rum
One Of the laughing mechanics ran
forward. but paused as a tall figure
advanced from The shadow OF the
stand. &
Floyd Strengthened up from bending
over the unhooded motor. shining
eysd and vtyidly aglow In the raw. salt
az that swept across The bare Long
Island meadown.
"stantonl" hs gladly welcomed, ana
stripped on D rubber glove 70 give
greeting; Floyd was girlishly careful
of hie hands ana always protected
them during work vnen posnthle,
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
FROneSR
OUR

SLATER.

SLATER.
Born-To Mr.. and Mrs. c. c.
Pinkard, Sunday August 10th, a
daughter.---Borr-to Mr.. and
Mrs. Hamp Boldng, Sunday Aug
ust 18th, a con. THE lght-
ming rod on the tile brick Chin
ney of the city electric light and
water plant was struck by light
ming last Tuesday morning. The
only damage done was the taxi
ing out of a portion OF one brick
about 20 feet from the ground. A
lightning rcd expert who was
in the door OF Lucas store said
the entire chimney would have
shattered had it not been for
the rods on Il. - Slater Rust.er.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

both men were content. Stanton had
felt the thrin Of relief and pleasure
upon seeing his mechanician which
surprised him into recognition OF how
much uneasiness the incident OF the
night before had caused him.
You will have to be kind 10 the
tires" Floyd warned. as he complied
with the directions. I'VE have only
got one extra set here. The shipment
for the race hasn't arrived yet"
why not?"
Goodness knows. Mr.. Green has
telegraphed TO the tire I
suppose they viii be along to-day, or
tomorrow at the worst"
Il should hope 80. Ready?"
Just about. Oh. they all say that
your trial for speeding In Pelham
Parkway took place day before ysster.
dsyr :
ut did"
Floyd stopped in the act Of ascend.
Ing to his seat
You didn't tell Jessica." hs re-
preached.
How do you known" querIed Stan
ton, astonished.
Il saw her late last night, on my
way here. What did they do to your"
Fined me all the law allowed
which the Mercury Company paid
and suggested the wisdom Of not doing
II again. ! didn't suppose Miss Floyd
would be interested in police court do
tails. Get In"
The mornings work had begun.
II was always q course race, the
Cup event. and In many places the
way lay over hastily prepared country
reads. Here and there men were still
st work. banking turns or smoothing
b ground. On the second time
around. the Mercury struck an edged
stone and lost . tire with q sharp ro-
port Stanton drew up by the road.
side. and Floyd ran back to pitch the
misunderstanding rock into the fields.
George and Palmer are out" he OBJ
served, returning. They might come
to grief on II. too. Besides. we our
selves might hit II again. like q
track race"
$50 do I. How many tires Ieftf"
Three
They worked rapidly. both for prac.
tice and from force Of habit. The
Duplex roared past at q leisurely gait,
while they busy. its driver wav-
ing q hand In sympathetic greeting.
Floyd paused to wave a response, and
presently the Mercury sped after its
rival
Before ten o'clock they had lost an
other tire.
Those tires IN YETI" demanded
Stanton. when he again drew up be-
fore the repair pit,
The harassed assistant manager
shook his head. exhibiting a sheaf OF
yellow kilograms.
Not yet. The Ruby Company tele-
graphs that they shipped the order
week by express; the express
company ~telegraphs that they sent the
carload on from Chicago two days ago
and II must be here"
"The freight car must have been
left In the New York yards. instead of
peins sont out mere, deduced stanton
axasperatedly.
New York says It isn't there"
Perhaps they shipped the order to
The Mercury factory by mistake"
Floyd suggested.
Mr.. Green looked at him IN scorn.
"Of urse I 'phoned there FIRST OF
I'll. The chief says they are not there.
sither. and to telegraph all along the
line until We trace the car"
Have you done III" Stanton in
I'm doing 1t now. I've got as far
vest 81 Utica and each freight yard
having them"
Well go 70 lunch. Floyd. The an
Iwers viii come in meanwhile"
There wa q hotel nearby. which
- Green made HE headquarters. and
Hhsre stanton and Floyd chose 70
'tay. 4 good many d the other driv.
y and officials also rematped TOR that
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
HoUsToNIA.

Andy Bodenhamer was kicked in
the abdomen by a mule at noon
yesterday, and his condition for
a time, was considered quite SER
iouA. He Ia much better today
Houstonian. o /
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
FREDERIC TfiORNBUpc

other explained. ant to
take the car out?"
when you're ready"
Il am ready now. Get some warm
things on, II is going to be chilly un-
I'LL the sun Is out"
1t was not an emotional meeting, but
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

Jumped from the water ard land
ed inside the boat.
Mr.. Robertson and his helper
never stopped to investigate, but
jumped from the boat which was
close to the shore and hastened
to the hotel and startled the
guests with a story OF the mons
ter fish which had jumped into
the boat almost upsetting il.
As II had commenced raining
hard, no investigation was made
until next morning, when they
found splashing around In the
boat a small garflsh about twelve
inches long.
Mr.. Robertson looked at the
garfish n moment and said dis
gustedly; swell, all ! have TO
say is, that fish has shrunk like
the deuce since last night
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Picnic at West Glasgow

The large delegation Of Glasgow
people in attendance at the picnic
given by members OF All Saints
church, West Glasgow, unite In
saving that II was the beet man
aged and most successful affair Of
the kind ever given in the Saline
bottom. People locked in from
Marshall, Slater, Gillian, Glas-
gov, Saline City and from the
surrounding country until the
grounds were crowded. The din
ner and supper was all that could
be asked, and was served in abun
dance; the music was good; the
amusements ample to keep all en-
tertained, and the weather favor
able. Father Strasburger and his
congregation deserve credit for
the fine picnic they gave. We
unable at this time to learn
the amount OF receipts. Glasgow
Mlssourian. :,
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1912-10-30
Death of Mrs. C.. H. BasfOrd

A sudden and unexpected death,
and one that removes from earthly
activities a lady VINO will be greatly
missed in Lancaster, was that Of
Mrs. G. 81. Basford, of this city,
which occurred at 6 10 last Saturday
evening, from heart failure. Mrs
Basford has not been in good health
for a long while, but has been taking
treatments that appeared to be cry
beneficial and was up and around at
her usual duties until Tuesday even
ing of last week when she was taken
seriously i'll Her two sons, L P.
and Harry Basford, and Mr., and Mrs.
Joseph Wright. the latter being her
only sister, arrived from Chicago
Saturday morning. so that all Of the
near relatives were with Mrs. Basford
when the dread came.
The funeral services were held at
the home yesterday afternoon at 9 80,
and were conducted by Rev. e.
Morgans, assisted by Rev. Chss T.
Beers. Burial TOOK place at hillside
cemetery. Other relatives present
from outside the city were Worden
Stephens and wife, OF Fennimore, Mrs.
John Stephens, of South Dakota. fall
Stephens and Mrs. Al Sturm9r, Of
Beetown.
Mrs. Basford has long been promin-
emily connected with the order of
Pythlan Sisters, and the following
officers of that order was present at
the funeral which was very largely
attended M. josie Nelson, Union
City, Ind. Mrs. Sarah Hinkley. Mil.
waukee; Mrs. R. 4. Schriter. Dodge
Vile; Mrs. Marie Keats. Benton.
There we're also present many old
friends of Mr.. and Mrs. Basford. from
Beetown. Patch Grove, Bloomington,
Glen Haven and other parts of the
county.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1912-10-30
0 M RIOTS AT FUNERAL
Crazed Grandmother Knocks Down
Two Men and Boy's Body Falls
From the Coffin.

Grand Rapids, Mich, Oct. 29.-Riot-
Gus scenes marked the funeral of ten
year-old Robert Spotwood. Two men
were knocked down with a chair by a
woman who had become deranged
suddenly and the body Of the boy was
thrown out of the coffin.
The funeral services we're under
the direction of L. A. Field, Christian
Science reader. When he read, 'The
Lord is my shepherd; | shall not
want" Mrs. Elizabeth Spotwood,
grandmother of the deceased boy,
arose from a seat in the front row,
picked up her chair and struck Mr..
Field, knocking him down.
Undertaken French interfered, but
was knocked down also.
In the excitement Mrs. SpOtwood
ran against the coffin, which fell to
the floor, the body rolling out.
Officers who arrived at the funeral
in response to a telephone call took
the woman to the city jail. The body
was replaced in the coffin and the
services resumed.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1912-10-30
Resolutions
R CLARA KNOX.

Resolutions of respect adopted by
Eva Camp No. 1904 Royal Neighbors
CT America. Lancaster, Wisconsin. as
a tribute to the memory of Clara
Knox. who died Oct. 5. 1919.
Whereas, Our Heavenly father in
his infinite wisdom and just goodness,
has been pleased to call to her eternal
home our neighbor and friend, Clara
Knox.
Whereas, In the death of our be-
loved neighbor Clara our Camp has
lost a faithful member, and a good
and true friend who but some time
ago was one amongst us, giving
promise of a long and useful life. A
reminder to us of the uncertainty of
life, and the certainty of death
Therefore be it,
Resolved, That Eva Camp No.
1904, in it's entire membership do
extend their heartfelt sympathies to
the %sorrowing husband and children in
their hour of bereavement and com
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1912-10-30
Record Crop of Oats.

Oats yielded 10 bushels per acre
on one of the test plots of the college
of agriculture of the University of
Wisconsin this year. This is twenty
bushels per acre more than ever before
on the increase plots, and they were
grown under ordinary farm conditions
except that they we're in small plots.
Several varieties yielded between so
and 100 bushels. These oats are Of
the varieties bred up for several years
by the agronomy department.
Samples were distributed two years
go to members Of the Wisconsin
Experiment association who ATE test
lng them and growing them in large
quantities in co operation with the
college.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1912-10-30
For County Clerk

Lancaster, Wis, Oct. goth, 1919
Mr.. Voter.
My Dear Sir:-As you are aware I
am the Republican candidate for
County Clerk at this general election.
Circumstances have been such that it
has been impossible for me to make a
PERSONAL anvass over the county. I
have had a good deal CT experience on
the County Board as member from the
town of Lancaster, prior to its divi-
sion, and afterwards from the town of
North Lancaster and l understand
county business.
/ am not going to burden you with
a long list Of reasons why | should be
elected.
| am the only farmer on either
the Republican or Democratic county
ticket, please think of that Mr.. Voter.
l shall greatly appreciate all the
support that I can get and if elected
shall give the office the best service
of which / am capable.
Thanking you for your attention
and votes, I am,
Very respectfully yours.
W. A. JOHNSON.