Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-06-23
UP ON CAPITOL HILL.

about to jab the steel octopus in the
tentacles with a report which will be on
the wires in few days now, were all al
dinner In the Press Club the other night.
Uncle Joe asked Mr.. Stanley whether or
not the report on the steel Investigations
would be a rip-snorter. and the Ken
tuckian smiled ont Of those imperturbable
smiles Of his.
Then Uncle Joe started on a story:
Joe Blackburn told me once that he
was walking down the street in nice
old town down in that sleepy south
country, when he met a regular Kahn
lucky cunnel. The cunnel had on a seven
and five-eighths black hat, with brim
about a yard wide, and he was chewing
tobacco:
How do. Mistah Blackburn
How do, cunnel; wheah have 20
been?
.''Wheah have l been? wheah have !
been? Why l just been down heah 70
Mistah Brickleys hotel, sab, and | have
evan heard, sab, with Cunnel Strothers.
What was the argument about
cunnel?
1--WE argued about the state of south
ern democracy, sab. We tipped coin
to see who would go first and he Won
He led off and argued for two soiio
hours. and then, sab, I got back at him
for two hours
You got the best of him. didn't you,
cunnel?
Got the best of him? Mistah Black
burn, l started out by calling him low
down, blackhearted, traitorous and I'M
gentlemanly yellow dog, and got stronger
and stronger till the two hours were up.
and that said Uncle Joe, is the way
you'd better start that steel trust report
If you want to get nybody to read it.
Uncle Joe Cannon and Representative
Garner seem to have the same idea about
congressional righteousness as does the
statue of Thomas Jefferson. from whom
a facetious interview was published in
The Star not long ago. A resolution hav-
ing been introduced into Congress to
change the name Of the House office
building to Jefferson Hall, the plain JEFF
fersonian democracy went up in the air
long way and is still in the clouds.
Thomas Jefferson never would have coun-
tenanced all that mahogany furniture end
plush cushion effect, and Uncle Joe got
into the Record on the subject short
while ago.
John Garner Of Texas, who seemed to
have something against the appropria-
tons committee was driving tacks into
the sundry civil bill, trying to puncture
1t. and Representative Fitzgerald of
Brooklyn was drawing the tacks out with
various expenses in the House office
building and Mr. Garner remarked:
Il believe that each committee Of the
House ought to have a convenient and
proper place In which to perform It's
work and conduct It's business, but I do
believe in justice to ourselves, and a
majority Of u.s. I am certain. want to in
culcate 1t here in the minds OF the bal
ance Of the minority. as 1t were, that the
idea of democratic simplicity has not
cd n N n
believe the case Of the committee on the
judiciary is one Of them"
las for me- remarked Uncle Joe. L
have never been in the office of the COM
said and done. think we might get along
in the House and Senate with much less
expensive furniture.
For instance, I would rather have, so
far as / am concerned. an old-fashioned
split bottom chair than these mahogany
chairs. and instead of these expensive
cuspidors, i would rather have one made
of brown crockery, fashioned out of blue
clay. which is not SO apt to break"
4
Representative Peters Of Boston speaks
with the broadcast "A possible.
Representative Oldfield Of Arkansas. a
member of the House District committee
and the chairman of the committee on
patents. was private in the Spanish
American war He was subsequently, pro-
noted to the grade of lieutenant.
J. Edwin Ellerbe, representative from
South Carolina. Is one OF the leading
rebel Yellers" in the House Whenever
any one can hear j. Edwin rebel yell
Ing" above all the other din.
No mere cub reporter dares take a nap
on the luxurious lounge In either the
House or Senate press gallery. That is a
privilege reserved for veterans who have
served at least one term. It was a vet
eran named Robert Hill who fell asleep
on the House gallery lounge one after
noon while the representatives were dron-
ing along on something in which nobody
was the least bit interested. Hill dreamed
on. He fell into a wondrous vision about
8 o'clock in the afternoon, and 1t conhn-
ued until some time later. He dreamed
that the House was embroiled In a most
terrific fight, and that he alone of all the
correspondents in the gallery was witness
to 1t Suddenly. without warning, his
vision ceased Hill awoke and, rushing
to the telephone, called his office:
The House adjourned" he beloved to
his chief. lat 5:55 pm"
II don't see exactly how that could be
that 1t is now only 5:15'
That same night the House stayed in
session till nearly midnight.
* X
: Representative Redneld Of New York
never played a game Of tennis in his life
His Brooklyn address. however. is No.
3 Tennis court
\ *
Representative Mann Of Illinois was in
a public park. He was poking around in
a flower bed with a cane. Up rushed one
of these busy people who want to be
recognized by public men:
"Ah, Mr.. Mann" he said, in sugar
tones, ut Is a beautiful day, isn't It?
And I see you are a lover of nature, too.
examining flowers so closelly.''
Mature nothing" retorted the minority
leader of the House. II dropped a quar-
ter, and I'm looking for it."
4 \
Representative Stanley Of Kentucky Is
a great believer in dumbbells as a gentle
exercise. He says he took off thirty six
pounds in almost no time by swinging
them about his head every morning.
EARL GOODWIN.
PLEASURE FLEET GROWING.