davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

cage. a lamp chimbley, a bahrl NV
saur krawt. a pianOla. tn v~Owdyville
the-ayter, tn marriage license, IN eat
ing pie with a fark. If We hev a CLEAN
NV human i~ntillygance, We "a answer
thes' aisy quischins. Anyhow livery
wan Shud know tn Tubby
shure We he'd a chanst to larn. Ye
kin find thin in WeBsJer's Unabridged
Dicthnry an tn almanac. w cO-Orse
| don't eXpict We to prOjooce all Wv
thes' answers. BIT if We ~mis-sphell a
wur-rud Ill take OFF tin. an if We mis-
place a comma, I'll hev We ixpilled."
Terence says. tn survivors NV tn
thrageddy ARE given gOOld medals.
Terence didn't git a medal, BIT he got
an r. which is fine.
Who writes tn cOr-rict answers
TO lawns quischins?" asks Mr.. Hin
missy.
Il calc'late." a Mr.. Duley, tibet
answers ARE a matther NV dis
crimnachun. an this SPECIAL subject
is abuv' tn comprehension NV Oncul-
tyvated people like ye'prself an me.
| want L say. Hinnisy. they may
take away our thrusts. our high tar
if an our civic ideals, BIT they shud
leave us our cOlledge eXaminachuns."
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

Columns. But that is a huge under
for so young and tender minds.
Will they fall err to all that is COM
mon to mankind and be crushed under
the weight of such a name?
Remember. friends, as you pass by,
AS you r now so once was /.
AS | am now so YOU must be.
Prepare for Death and follow me.
The Making of a Musical Comedy"
is a new book Jointly written by SlOb-
by Fakeman and |. VI. Skinneworth.
The authors have had much expert
ence in the line and have designed it
for a textbook. Many illustrations
are taken from THE Hundred Buck
Counterfeit and The Land of the
Bull Fighters" Short histories are
given of other eminent college play
wrights. Nlackbillan. 81 cents,
Aesthetics and Sign Painting" is
just of the pen of lisa DOre Lobe. BY
a well worked out argument on a cul-
tural basis. the author shows how
degenerating is the evil of sign paint.
ing up on the finer sensibilities anG
aesthetic fiber of University students
HowtOn, Miphlin L. Co., Sl.lO.
when Jessy Went to Boarding
School" is a series of red-bloodet
stories taken r~eminiscently from the
life of the author. Miss Jessy Wray.
thelle. Jessy gets into and out of many
perpleXing scrapes. For instance. she
once attended two dances on the sam
night. The frontispiece is the au
thor's picture. Mackbillan $500.
Four volumes of history by PROBES
sor Wrenholme have recently beef
completed. Professor Wrenholme ha.
been working on these ever since h
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

Il heer." says Mr.. Hinnisy, Theirs
talk Nv thin doin' away with thin
cOlledge eXaminachunS."
"Whut does tibet prO-ove," says Mr..
Duley, removing his pipe, BIT tibet
it's tn Irish whut suffers be all ray
forms? Who invinted %cOlledge eX-
aminachuns. Hinnisy , Who BIT tn
BLESSED Saint Pathrick. Wan fOine
March day Pathrick says to tn luther
saints,
" Sure an | think tibet on next
Fridah. tn s~ivinteenth, we'll how'd
a colledge examinachun.' Wall, Hin
missy. tn frogs skipped an ye'erself
knows tibet tn snakes wiggled out
Nv it,"
"Ye mind Terence. Dinnis OLeary's
bye. don't We, Hinnisy? Afther
OI.eary Went to the sinit he STINT
Terence to wan uv thes' cOlledges..
Terence towld me all about thes'
cOlledge eXaminachunS. He says
Thea re tn champeen lithry thra-ats.
hough o~nforchinitly the'er ~circylachun
is limited I o a silict few. As ray
spict ye'er intelligence, Mr.. Duley, I'll
explain say he.
Its like this: lawn says the
cillybrated prifisser. Samuel AlOysus
Clamback. one Afternoon. to tn jani-
tor who'd come in to Swape out, TO
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
MIR. DULEY
THE COLLEGE EXAMINATIONS
by F. Z. Done.

morrow we'll hey an eXaminachun
an | wish YOU wud write tn quischins
tonight
BIT" says |, i%ntherupton Terence.
'th' janitOr at iIOgan's fiat can't
write"
Il see Mr.. Duley.' says Terence,
janial like. tibet We ividintly don't
know tibet %eddycation is like adver-
tisin', Il matter Nv location. Name
while" continues Terence, 'th' b'yes
all jine tn Insomynya Club an cram
the'er faces full Nv Onfamilyar wurdS
an reysoive to rayform an Civ up
cisarcts."
"We" in the marnin whin tn Occu-
pants NV tn rune ARE all seated.
tn prifissor inters into the'er midst
an mans avery wan a doccymint "a.
a piece NV pa-apor. | hpv nln thryln
he says afiichunitly, to hist We firm
I'll mirc ny ignorance. If We raymem-
her anything | hey sed in III last
sixteen weeks. We may put ii down
fr an anSWc As tn phrlnter has
m~is-spheiled most ~ til wur-ruds,
I'll read tn quischins fur We. Give
tn name an date NY tn bur-ruth Nv tn
party an whin he invinted the follow
ing articles: tn cash raygesther, tn
schenic railroad. Hamlet. cramepuffs.
false teeth, face pOwdher, tn bur-rud
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
WHAT IS HIS REASON FOR EXISTING:

WHAT IS HIS REASON FOR EXISTING:
There is no doubt that Icy is. That IS a toregone conclusion.
He undoubtedly is. But what we want to know is WHY Ivy: -.
There are certain things that the PUBLIC DESERVES 10
KNOW and we ;ntend to find out. We believe the people of our
CITY have come to the POINT where they are justified in demanding
the reason of Izzv. We have this to say to those who are IN a position
to know. CAN YOU SATISFACTORILY EXPLAIN THE
REASON FOR Ivy Unless YOU can give a sufficient answer
the people have a right to know why YOU can't The people want
to KNOW. Gentlemen. WIZ Ivy !:
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

came to Missouri and it is said for
six 70 seven years before that. HIS
friends will be glad TO know that the
work is completed. Duble Week
Leaflet and Co. 50 cents per volume,
complete set, S1.25.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

To reduce flesh try the exercise OF
finding three collar buttons under a
double bed daily. The results VIII
surprise you.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

The faculty DESTROYS the ambition OF the lafer. 1t saps his
energy: it lowers his self esteem. 1t avEheS tavorS IN the self
sufficient and neglectS the needy.
1t uses defenseless students for experimentation in teaching and
science. It has no conception Of talent. Future genIuSeS 1t calls
ienoramuses. 1t has often canned the best men who ever enrolled
as students.
The faculty is a pessimiSt. an F giver. 1t kicks the low man
lower.
but i revel, in Intoxicating punch at heght-of fashion balls.
CAN THE FACULTY.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
IZZY---WHY Ivy

Not long 20 there wa a certain modest little man who came
to take charge of our University. 1t is still in his charge, and the
University ha-well. it is still here. anyway: But the all absorbing
question of the dav is. WHY IS THIS MAN:
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

WHY hemoan our lost Leota when we have a Mar1et:
Good for the goods who have decided to wear l1arem Skirts IN
order to avoid crossing the cobbe stones III hobbies.
If YOU can't get a thing dishonesty. steal it.
What do the standpatters on the freshman ruling tor fraternlteS
think now?
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

The faculty Is supposed to teach. But it doesn't. 1t restricts
the natural tendencies of human life. Hour after hour it holds its
restless victims in hot. stufy class rooms. Under its restraint the
students cannot roam among the hills and woods picking flowers
and composing poetrv-actS necessary to adolescent development.
This Is not right.
THE STUDENTS SHOULD BE FREE.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
THE YELLOW EXTRA
The University Missourlan

A saffron freak of fun and frNolty published annually by students
of the School of Journalism, University of Missouri, IS a horrible
example of what a newspaper should not be.
Golden Rule-Do unto others IS you would not like to be did by
Motto-Never let facts interfere with a good story:
Subscription price 5 cents per copy, and al attack of apopeNy.
Circulation books locked in a steel vault where no pryng adver-
tiser may get to them.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

The faculty is not democratic. 1t is made up OF lords. autocratS.
plutocrat>. tyrantS. IT IS AN OIIGARCIl. IN WHICH THE
STUDENTS ARE SLAVES.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

The student risks his health. his life. his future strength when
he becomes a cadet. Through mud and slush. with cold and fever.
must he tramp. Sickness brings only reiuke. Selfsupportng labor
receives rebuff. not praise.
Military duty is a Scourge. 1t is more terrible than hazng.
Within its grasp lies the fate OF hundreds. 1t is as certain as death.
WAR IS HE'LL"
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

STAFF.
w. a. hurst. Editor.
John D.. ROCKEFELLER, Business Manager.
Ananias, City Editor.
Baron Munchausen, Sporting Editor.
DR.. Frederick A. Cook. Artic Editor.
Lucretia Borgia. Society Editor.
Sherlock Holmes. and W. ]. Burns. Reporters.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
Abolish The faculty

Recall faculty decisions
NcTcr.
Recall the faculty
NCUcr.
ABOLISH THE FACULTY !
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11
WAR is HE'LL"

Pave the Quad for military. Take down the Columns. Give the
cadets more room.
Make Fenery -Armer commander in-chief of the University.
Make Fizzidore Dobe car OF the United States. Let us have dici-
plne. Let us have TRAINED soldiers.
Our present system is inefficient. 1t does not train men: it makes
subordinateS of them. Our officers could not command a boy scout
regiment.
WE MUST HAVE REFORM.
Why does the student take military: Is it patriotism: Is it love
of country:
1t IS not.
He takes military because he must. Military is all supreme
No other course in the University takes precedence over it. None
other is SC all important.
THEN. WHY NOT HAVE THE BEST:
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

Entered at the postotice at Gem of the Ocean as hot stuff.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1912-04-11

Four volumes of history by Profess
sor Wrenholme have recently been
completed. Professor Wrenholme has
been working on these ever since he
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

The newspapers Idaho ridden public institutions
the state the free advertising institution
the state has its publicity bureau which has for boosting
normal college university through the
institution has been working successfully that every paper
has contributed safe estimate least fifty dollars
school and the amounted every year. Some
the worth while the community which the
newspaper ccae but often The copy which
some fifty newspapers mmeogahed the expense
often comes the poorly linked and printed
pheed by but Chinese lngust The
mate that the duty the educational state
which them for the column spurious
There always sides and the would like
present the side the its readers institutions
the first place the schools and universities entirely b the
state from funds raised by taxation the appropriation
Every community taxed for the supportregardess of the
benefit received and each the share of the
taxes 1t in this respect doing any other
taxpayer toward such support Should do any any other
citizen corporation sells supplies abo institution
expected and the schools can the
state institutions advance for asking the space
which the them
to the merchant The Times why the
be expected do than the
printed valuable the schools publicity should be paid for at
the same basis as the other public pningTwn Falls Times
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
ADVERTISING-OR NEWS?

people outside the business fail distinguish
wiuy
day the fellow who
much offended tell him advertising
and simple In the last issue of the Rupert Pioneer Record
drawn between and advertising and present herewith
lee decided difference between advertising
the fellow who looking something nothing appears
to find the distinguishing line The anticipation of
event which advertising nothing The
thing that has happened Every article which appears
anticipating something for community advocating
enterprise industry advertising freely and without
the publisher consideration the patronage
fare of his patrons In order do this the publisher
should have for advertising which
nature and at which admission fee charged anything offered
sae the public institution All publishers
only glad but anxious give respectable weup any
which has occurred they the particulars many
their to do when the interested
in the affairs to report Idaho Falls Post
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
NOTICE OF SHERIFFS SALE UNDER WRIT
OF EXEeUTION-RE Al ESTATE.
rip

PENDANT ~
Under and by virtue of a writ of execution
issued out of the District Court of the Second
Judicial District, of the state of Idaho, In and
Tor the county of Idaho, and to me directed
and delivered, for a judgment rendered In the
Distrlct Court OF the county of Idaho state of
Idaho, on the 18th day of January, A. d. 1912,
"a favor OF ii G. Oliver, and against A. Broyles.
for the sum of Three Hundred Eighty Five
and s3-100 dollars (3S5 S3) of which Fort Five
ful money OF the United States, together with
costs and interest, have levied upon ali the
right, title claim and interest of said defendant
A. Broyles of, in and to the following described
real estate, situated in Idaho county, Idaho.
to wit: o'
Lot No. two {2) and the north half of the
southwest quarter of the northeast quarter
ma of SW14 of NEl4 and the east half of the
northwest quarter, LEI of NWl4) of section
eighteen, tls) in township thirty one, (31) n
Tour (4) e b. NJ. containing l49 acres, more
on less according to the U. s. Government
survey.
!. Public notice is hereby given, that on satur-
DAY, the oath day of February, A. d. 1912 at 10
O'Clock a. m. of said day, in front of the Court
House door In the city of Grangeville, Idaho
county, Idaho, will in obedience TO said writ
OF execution, sell all the right, title claim and
interest OF said defendant A. Broylee of. In ana
to the above described property, or 40 much
tnereof as may be necessary to satisfy plain-
tl1,s Claim, bes des COSTS interest and accruino
costs to the highest and best bidder for Lawful
money OF the United States.
J. /. Overman,
Sheriff OF Idaho County.
Da.eo January "a, A. D. 1912. 35A
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
TARIFF IS A TAX.

The word tax should substituted for the word tariff The people
would then the question people would then
the projections theory for them their prosperity
would be the everything they 10 the
word instead Of would be make appear ridiculous
the saying tariff WOOL it would be bet
the wool tax he 1.-The implement "the
sewing machine tax The But the people
know what tax They know they themselves The word tariff has
certain ring it that sounds like paid third party
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

When her child is in danger a
woman will risk her life to protect it.
No great act of heroism or risk of life
is necessary to protect a child from
Group. Give Chamberlain Cough
Remedy and all danger is avoided.
For sale by all dealers.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Notice is hereby given that teachers s ssnre.
nation will be held at the Court House. Gls. -.
wife, February %, % aud "a. The morhlns =
sion will begin at a. m. - m
Applicants at this examination may WIZ iiaa.,s
hrst, second and third grade county ccrtin0''
ana Tor state certificates and life Diplomas and
All permits expire at this examination, rblIc
money unless they have a valid certiilca aaent
file in the office OF the County superinIehsass.a
r. NJ. Granville, County Superintendent o.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

sedentary habits, lack Of outdoor
exercise, insufficient mastication of
food, constipation, a torpid liver,
worry and anxiety, are the mos.
common causes of stomach troubles.
Correct your habits and take Cham
beilain's Stomach and Liver Tablets
and you will soon be well again. For
sale by all dealers.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
NOTICE OF FORFEITURE.

-, To A. Murphy: You are hereby notified
ina, ina of nave expended. during the years 1905,
Isos, islo ana 1911, $500 In labor and Improve.
ments 500 for each of these years. on the
lndependence Quartz Mining claim in Mar
s Sn Lake Mining District, Idaho County.
stare q OF Idaho. Which the location certificate
Is found on record In Book II, Page FIi. OF
records OF said Idaho county, Idaho. Which
ss H. labor and expenditures was made by SAID
said mining claim under the provision Of Sec
uoh 2S2A Revised Statutes OF the Vnited
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Application for grazing permits. Nou asmiu
hereby given that I'LL applications ioi w. H.
Nexperce National Forest during the seasso;ils.
1912, must be filed in my Office at Gran,sIir ior-
Idaho. on or before March l, 1912. Fun - b
nation In regard to the grazing fees maxi
ing applications Wit be furnished upon re9ss
Geo. v. Ring, Supervisor.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

states, and being the amount required to Eolaa
said claim for the above mentioned years., az az
II within 80 days after the publication OF tnD
notice you fail to contribute your proportion
as eo,owner Of said expense Of s400 together
with the cost c. ...J publication, so,.. ...ssI
IN said claim will become the property oil ,unr s
undersigned under the provision Of said x w
ton 2S2i ofthe Revised Statutes of thesonas'
States.
J. G. Callahan
Grangeville, Idaho January II. 1911. .o,o
Expires April D. W.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Walter Hickerson says that there
are twelve different towns shipping
their laundry work to the Electric
Laundry. They surely must be get
ting prompter service, lower prices and
better work than they can get else
where. 37-tf
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

You are probably aware that pneu-
monia always results from cold, but
you never heard of a cold resulting
in pneumonia when Chamberlain S
Cough Remedy was used. Why
take the risk when this remedy may
be had for trife? For sale by all
dealers.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Few people realize how many long
standing cases Of continued or period.
ical headache can be cured by correct
ly fitted glass. See DIR. jackson, the
Eyesight Specialist. 36-tf
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Nervousness and stomach trouble
are some of the danger signals the
brain sends out to the sufferer from
eyestrain. See DR.. Jackson, the eye
sight Specialist and have the eyestrain
cured by properly fitted glasses. 36-tf
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Strayed-From Whitebird station.
bay horse, weight about 1900; NO
brans, rail- white spot in forehead.
Had on full tug harness. Finder
leave at Georges livery. $40 reward.
Zo-u j. +. Barton.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
BUT HOW MANY AT THE POLLS?

President Taft will have 80 the total of 1916 the first
the Chicago 2 the majority for nom
nation according Representative William Mckinley, Illinois, G. d.
He secretary PRESIDENT Murray of Masa
chusetts
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

For Sale-16O acres of patented
land for $3.50; $500 down and $3.50
a year at 9 per cent until paid. Well
located. House and barn. Arnold
Bros. 2A-,f
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Steam Rolled Feed, the best yet.
We have it at McLeans Ware.
house. lift
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
TO ALL WHOM IT MAY CONCERN.

Spokane, Wash, Jan. 10Th lsla
This Is to certify that the following certiiies1
OF stock heretofore issued to IL. J. rice, III NV
GOLD Ridge Mining and Development Companni.
mas this day been cancelled by order o. lns
board OF directors, the same having been lssue'
without any consideration to the company.
This notice is published by order of the oos ~
OF directors of the Gold Ridge Mining ana "
yelopment Company
stock certificates cancelled are rs follows,
CertifiCafa No II IN O00 shares
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Wanted-Fresh milk COW at once
Fem Batty. 37-3
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15
aucelled are as follows
70 aaA L q reg
NOTICE TO TEACHERS, EXAMINATION

Making total OF 81, 600 shares
A. A. Hammer, Secretary. OF
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Folk has withdrawn will work
for the candidacy of Champ Clark Everything looks favorable for Carks
nomination
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

Money to loan. Geo. M. Reed.
Idaho County free press. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho Territory) 1886-current, 1912-02-15

dnane benefit Is
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1912-10-04
OWES $4,000 FOR AUTO HIRE
Frank Poth, Son of Brewer, Charged
With Getting False Credit.

Philadelphia, Oct Prank L..
Poth, son of the late Frank A. Poth,
the brewer, is under $4,000 bail under
a charge of false pretences in getting
credit to the extent of $4,000 for au-
tomobile hire. The complainant is
the Pyott Automobile Company,
which declares that Poth rented au-
tomobiles by the month, declaring, to
get the credit, that he was in charge
of the large estate left him by his
father when, as matter fact, The
estate is held in trust and Poth has
an allowance
He has been defendant in numer-
Gus actions brought by creditors, but
Pyott is the first to bring the charge
of false pretence against him.