Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1912-09-05

49, WV Wv "SoA0 "a
eighth hat"
MY wife wants me to get her some
ribbon to trim a dress. What shade do
you think h would like?"
MY wife has just got back from the
east and doesn't like the overcoat I
take 1t back?"
Huh. they amt wearin' them hats
in New York now. You don't see 'em
In any of Bud Fishers cartoons"
What kind OF a necktie would my
husband like for his birthday"
Are those $1.29 cuff links solid gold?
II not, I don't want them"
FROM THE HICKEYvILLE
Grandpa Bibbins must be about
the Oldest Teller in the state. He
says he kin remember when there
wasn't no derby hats.
Lem Higgins, who came back form
the west this week, says there amt
no town like old Hickeyville after all,
and l guess, by gravy. that there amt.
At least, there amt none just
like it.
Uncle Ezra Harkins says he's got
q lot Of distant relatives. They must
have been borryin' money from him.
etess OF passion. VINO is one of the
greatest unknown poetesses in this
country, expects to add a contribu-
ton to the immense number of III
tanic poems just as soon as she kin
find time from her duties as second
rhyme with panic"
1 never yet went into a gruc'ry
store that I didn't see a kerosene can
settin' on the floor with a potato
stuck on its snoOt.
will noHor holio,,o tho ~;l1o~ir-,
Is at hand until the growers begin to
put the best berries in the bottom of
the box and the green ones on
top.
Mr.. .Anariah Tinker, the eminent
horseologist and apostle of the vet
rather remarkable fact that a mule
cannot emit a sound from his mouth
If you tie his tail to his hind leg or
weight it down with a 5O-pound block
of iron. The doctor has been making
some valuable experiments along this
line during the asst few weeks. which
have been fraught with dire peril. Be-
fore he proved the fact that a mule
cannot sing when its tail is tied down,
he suffered five broken rib INC had
to pick himself up out Of an adjacent
cornfield several times. In fact, nearly
everything he had was broken except
ing his neck and his dollar watch,
which kept on ticking under the most
strenuous circumstances. But the doc
tor says he is amply repaid by the
knowledge that he has given the world
a great truth. The pursuit Of science
ever has its sacrifices.
Mrs. Prunella Handy has invented
q new method of getting rid Of the
festive yet pestiferous mosquito dur-
ing the summer months. She has
combined some chemicals which, If
injected into the neck of the mosqui-
A. &A .~&--~ t.
stantly and permanently dulls the m
sibilities of the animal. All that is nee
essary to do is to catch the mosquito,
inject the chemical n while the mo-
sQuito is in a comatose condition, 60
out in the woodshed and get a club or
the ak and end the animals life.
Mr.. Thaddeus Parker, who is the
most eminent bugologist Of this local.
fly. has invented a new scheme for
the humiliation of potato bugs. 1t is
q sort of community plan which will
ave the individual from an immense
amount of work. It is planned to
have the hose company OF that locality
go o this summer with their hand
engine and do all the spraying that is
needed. 1t is not thought that the fire
company would have to miss many
fires and the influence upon the potato
crop would be invaluable.
Mr.. Emory. Walpole, who is an emf
nent and highly respected snakeist n
authority On r~eptileology, has had a pet
blacksnake for several years. which he
always carries with him in his buggy.
The snake has been taught many use
full tricks, but the most important one
is to act as hitching strap when Mr..
Walpole wishes to tie his horse. The
snake glides out Of the buggy, craps
the ring in his jaws and firmly wraps
his tail around the h.tching post. hold
ing the horse securely until Mr.. Wal
pole returns from his shopping our
among the village thirst garages
A strong movement is o n foot to
have the crooks taken out Of SwaZey
creek. As the stream now runs q
raft Of logs has to travel about 20