The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1912-06-14
LOCALS

the city Tuesday. He says that while
the spring was very hard on lambs,
every indication points to most ex-
cellent grazing this summer and fall.
The women-folk who will spend the
day in Caldwell during the rush June
9th may relieve much of the nerve
stress by remembering that we have
police matron that day whose duty
it is to answer ten thousand six hun
dred and seventy seven questions by
phone or otherwise and that she will
know thrice this number of interest
ing things about the city. If child
is lost, some one will pick it up and
hike over to her Office. If bunch of
little folks are getting dangerously
near the creek running through the
city, she will have deputy whose
duty it is to shew them away. If
some little country fellow has not
been warned against the high tension
wires and he gets curious and take an
investigating turn of mind, some de-
putty matron will pass him on. She
will know the way to the doctors
Office, to every rest room, to every
grove or lawn where it is lawful to
enter that day unheraleded, will be
Jonny on the spot to every cry of
every woman or child, will know the
arrival OF every special or regular
train or electric car during the entire
day and will help to spot every false
move that is made by strangers who
come along, and in short. Caldwell is
going to be metropolitan in many re-
spects during the Homesteaders' Day.
The city dads aught to put up a
sign in our public public drinking
fountains explaining to the people
that it is not necessary to try to swal-
low the funnel every time it is used,
around the fountain pipe. A rough
young fellow approached the foun-
tain one day last week, piped off
curiously, approached it very like a
three year old filley SHES up to the
flour mill. looked about himself sheep
ishly like he was about to do some
thing wrong or something good for
the first time, braced up and put his
lips and teeth down over the whole
thing and closed down like a wise.
The water came faster than he could
swallow, but he was thirsty and held
to it. His face commenced to swell,
his ears began to lay back close to
his head, his eyes closed in the final
struggle and pop went the weasel.
he had used one of the very latest
antiseptic germ eradicating and saliva
washing fountains and had licked from
1t all the germs of the week and had
deposited all he had in return for the
favor. -.
Your representative has decided on
his trip this time through homestead
er territory that the big mystery does
not lie in the fact that the homestead
er does finally make a good home. or
that three years is long enough to
reside theron, or in the fact that it
is always best to be on good terms
with your wife's folks back east so
you can get little help right along
without borrowing it, nor in fact that
the women folks who are usually so
timid will bravely live alone while the
breadwinner is away weeks at a time
getting food; but the one immense
mystery must be in the fact that no
matter how much of a shack is, how
poor and humble it is, how forsaken
the barns and the stack yards look,
how desolate the acre and a half Of
cleared patch that is thought to be
hve acres, how uncertain one is of
getting drink of water at the place
called home, nor whatever else is
under the standard the home steader
wife who answers your knock at the |
door IS sure to wear a clean shirt
waist, a we'll pressed accompaniment, !