davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

WASHINGTON.-In a way a very
w ludicrous thing happened in one
Of the committee rooms recently when
The official reporter declared that the
documents submitted in a certain case
were fabricated, because they read
@too smoothly" and that men did not
talk that way. The stenographer lost
his job, but the fact remains that
members of congress and United
States senators are absolutely depend
ent upon the official steRographers for
decent records of the scattering and
oiten incoherent and original speeches
which they make in congress. It is
positively funny to listen to some
Of the speeches, and then read the
same speech as It is ironed out for
print in the Congressional Record.
A representative, for instance, gets
np and says: 'Mr. Speaker-Mr,
speaker-am I recognized, Mr-ur-
Observation-Disclosures? I-ur-
have-ur-ah been ah-ur-listening
-ur with a good deal of interest, sir
i mean Mr.-ur-Speaker, to the
ur-remarks, sir-I mean-ur, Mr..
5peaker-ur - Mr. Speaker - from
Wayback, and-ur-I want to say,
Mr.. Speaker-ur-ah-u that, Mr..
5peaker-ur representing the consti-
tuents Of a-ur-a-ur great congress
Eional district of more than 100000
members, sir, I mean-ur Mr.. Speak
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

Jcreech that was heard quarter of
a mile away and started men running
for the scene.
"Here-what's the matter!" de,
manded the driver of the auto as
he came to a sudden stop.
Help! Help!"
Speed was put on and the auto dis
appeared.
by George, Miss Graves" ex-
claimed a first conner, who at least
knew the girl by sight, "but this is
about the boldest thing l ever heard
Of around here!"
''Was-was he trying to carry me
oh?" was gasped.
Sure thing! Yes, ma'am, it was
bold attempt at abduction, and the
wonder is that he didn't have con-
federate to choke you into silence
and helplessness. By George, but
this village is getting to be worse
than New York city!"
The scoundrel had been noticed at
the depot by men who thought he
acted suspiciously. No one had taken
the number Of the auto, and it was
considered useless to follow.
The major hadn't closed the deal
for the auto, and he waan't at the
depot-either with or without 1t. OF
course, Miss Marjorie had a story to
tell when she got home, and it was
the attempted crime that reused the
fathers ire. Was this the twentieth
century? Was the police force of the
village, consisting Of two men, being
paid enormous salaries to catch Grim
inals red-handed or to play checkers
and sleep? The major asked a great
many other questions that neither his
wife or daughter could answer, and
wound up with the threat to have the
state militia called out.
Meanwhile something had happened
at a manor house two miles away.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
Not Seen in Congressional Record

err cannot afford-ur 10 sit here and
hear these constituents, sir-ur in
suited, sir, by remarks, sir, mean,
Mr. Speaker, Of the gentlemen from
Wayback, and -ur stand here, sir,
In the presence of the great American
-ur-ur people 10 defend yes, sir,
to defend the bringing, sir, upon my
constituents, sir, that is-ur satisfac'
tory-ur to all when l was elected
UT to this honorable body, sir. But,
sir-I mean, Mr.. Speaker" And
about this time the gavel OF the
speaker comes down with bang that
rattles the medalllons in the glass
ceiling, and he says just as easy: "The
time of the gentleman from -- has
expired" and his oratory is cut
short. Now, you don't suppose for
once that that sort Of stuff is going
to appear in the Congressional Rec
ord. No, indeed. The official stenog
rapher has taken down every "uh
and ah," and goes to the little desk
at the end of his five minutes stands,
and talks II into the dictograph just
as smooth and pretty as anything you
ever read in your life, and 1t comes
out just as though Mr.. Representative
was an orator of the first class, and
he sends it back TO his constituents
and they think he's wonderful to
speak right on the floor of congress
in that wonderful way.
It is the general belief among news.
paper readers that it is the so-called
"Backwoods" statesmen, who are the
guilty ones in this respect, but the of.
flcial stenographers say that the re.
marks of some of the members known
throughout the land as brilliant ora.
tors, would at times look something
like the foregoing.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
AROUND THE
CAMPO a,3X
FIRE &gSg::aa
KISS BROUGHT BACK A LIFE
Incident Showing Tenderness Of
Heart Of Martyred President
Scene Worthy Of Artist.

No story of Abraham Lincoln so
well illustrates the great tenderness
Of his heart as that which tells OF the
kiss he gave a wounded soldier-hero.
In a narrow cot in the military hos
pital at City Point Maj. Charles H..
Houghton was dying. He had been in
command of Fort Haskell, strategic
point In the rear of Grants lines.
against which all the fury OF Lees
attack was being directed in an effort
to break the Union lines. Against
Maj. Houghton, a mere boy Of 20 years
old, were pitted the science and STRAIT
egic knowledge Of Gen. John B. Cor
don, Of Georgia.
Shortly after, at 9 o'clock one morn
ing, the door at the end of the ward
was opened and DIR. Macdonald, chief
surgeon, called:
Attention! The President Of the
United States"
Those on the cots who had the
strength sat erect; nurses propped
others against pillows Hands went
to pallid foreheads in the military sa-
lutte and weakened hearts beat fast
again as in the doorway appeared
the form of the man who stood for
all that thousands of other men had
fought for, died for and would live
for.
There outside the door, the sunlight
streaming into the room over square,
gaunt shoulders, stood Abraham Lin
coin. Into the room he stalked, bend
ing his awkward form ungracefully,
for the doorway was low. At cot
after cot he paused to speak some
word of cheer.
At Houghton's cot the two men
paused. This is the man." whispered
Macdonald.
With a large, uncouth hand the
President motioned for chair. 81
lently a nurse placed one at the cots
head. Houghton did not know; he
could not. As though he were afraid
it would clatter and hurt the sufferer,
Lincoln softly placed his "stovepipe"
hat of exaggerated fashion on the
floor. Gently as a woman he took
the wasted, colorless hand in his own
sinewy one Of iron strength Just the
suspicion Of a pressure was there,
but HoughtOn opened his eyes. Slow
ly, DULY he realized who 1t was be-
side him.
A smile which had forgotten suffer
ing answered the great Presidents
smile Of pain. In tones soft, almost
musical, it seemed, the President
spoke to the boy on the cot, told him
how he had heard Of his great deeds,
how he was proud Of his fellow coun-
tryman. how he had saved an army.
A few feeble words Houghton spoke
in reply. At the poor, toneless voice
tle President WINGED. The doctor
had told him that Houghton would
die. Then happened a strange thing.
The President asked to see the wound
which was taking so noble a life.
Surgeons and nurses tried to dis
suade him, but Lincoln insisted. The
horrors of war were for him to bear
as well as others. he told them, and
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

interests. An international commits
sion undertook the deepening of one
Of the delta channels, and a joint
commission of the riparian states
removed the dangers of the rapids.
The scenery along the Danube is as
varied as the people that dwell on its
banks. There are stretches whose
beauty rivals that Of the picturesque
parts of the castled Rhine; then
comes the monotony of the wide plain;
then it breaks once more through
mountain chains and again the scene
is wild and beautiful.
There is more of the beautiful blue
Danube connected with Austria-Hun-
gary than with any other state; and
this river and its tributaries cement
the heterogeneous parts Of that com
posite country more naturally and
more firmly than laws and treaties
can. Far more freight is moved on
the Danube than in and out of the
Austrian Adriatic ports; so that in
spite of the possession of a strip OF
coast, the monarchy may be called an
inland state. Unfortunately for this
government, the all-important Danube
slips from it by flowing far beyond
the borders Of the land, yet it has even
in politics a directing influence, The
eyes of Austrian statesmen are turn
ed eastward. Economically and polit-
ically the Danube is of such dominat-
ing significance to Austria-Hungary,
that it has been suggested that this
conglomerate state be called not the
dual monarchy, but the Danubian
monarchy.
The Danube was the scene of Rom
an colonization, of the fierce inroads
of the migration of the Hunns, the
Avars, and the Nagyars, of the ad-
vance of the Crusaders to the east, of
that of the Turks toward the west,
and more recently of the growth Of
the House of Hapsburg and Of the
disintegration of the Ottoman realm.
What causes this frequent reference
in history to the Danube and its val
lay? A glance at the map will ac-
count for it; stretching from the
head waters of the Rhine, the Rhone,
the Elbe, and the Oder to the Black
Sea, the Danube forms and for ages
has formed the connecting link be-
tween the Orient and the Occident.-
Journal of Geographers.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

to him the wound was a thing holy
Bandages long and stained were re-
moved, and the President saw.
"Oh, this war! This awful, awful
war!" he sobbed.
Down the deep lined furrows of the
homely, kindly face hot tears burned
their way. Slowly, tenderly, the
President leaned over the pillow.
Now the tears Of which he was not
ashamed cut heavy burrows in 1t and
splotched the white sheets on which
they fell. While nurses and surgeons
and men watched there in the little
hospital Abraham Lincoln took the
pallid face Of Houghton between his
hands and kissed it. just below the
damp, tangled hair.
my boy" he said brokenly. swaI-
lowing, you must live. You must
1--we"
The first gleam of real, warm,
throbbing life came into the dull eyes.
Houghton, stiffened, with a conscious.
elastic tension in the cot. With a
little wan smile he managed to drag
a hand to his forehead. It was the
nearest he could come to a salute.
The awkward form Of the President
bent lower and lower to catch the
faint, faint words.
Il intend to, sir" was what Hough-
ton said. And he did.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
What Every Woman Knows.

A Cleveland school teacher writes
that she asked her class what was the
Inference between the expressions, "a
while" and "a time" Nobody seemed
% have any idea on the subject.
Finally the light Of intelligence was
leen to shine in the eyes of one little
BOY, and the teacher called upon him
o save the intellectual honor of the
.lass.
81 know, teacher!" he cried eagerly.
When papa says he's going out for a
while, mamma says she knows he's
going out for a time!"
That's one way of looking at it
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
TIP LANDS MAN IN PRISON
Suspected Of Theft, He Proves Colin
Gift Was Given Him by
Patron.

Los Angeles.-ArTested on a charge
of having stolen twenty-five cents
from the cash register Of the Globe
Dairy Lunch at $50 South Main street,
M L. Strawn, formerly employed at
the place as a waiter, proved before
Judge Chambers that the money which
he was accused of stealing had been
given him as a tip by M. Tinsley, Cen
trail avenue meat dealer.
G. A. Barraclaugh, manager of the
lunch, testified that he placed marked
money in the register. On April he
saw Strawn place his hand in his
pocket after ringing up a sale on the
register, and believed he had taken
a coin from the register An officer
was called, and on searching Strawn
marked twenty-fve-cent piece was
found
Strawn explained that Tinsley had
paid his bill with a dollar, and on re-
ceiving the change had given him the
twenty-fve-cent piece.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
'T'n hunt him down, II have 10
out hloOdhonndR ON his trnill"

'TTl hunt him down, If / have TO
put bloodhounds on his trail!"
Nov, major!" soothed the wife.
Nov, papa!" soothed the daugh.
ter.
THE scoundrel shall not escaped"
roared the major as he paced the
room. I'm have the police after him
within an hour-within a quarter Of
an hourl"
But, majorl"
But, papa!"
Marjorie had been uptown to do
some shopping. The major had been
talking of buying an auto, and ex-
pected to close the deal that day. II
the event came of the machine would
be at the depot to meet her as she
came home on the o'clock train
She had only stepped off when a man
touched her arm and raised his cap
and said:
This way TO the auto, please"
So her father had closed the deal,
and was probably sitting in the auto
outside waiting her appearance! But
he wasn't The machine was tenant
less, but the man gave her a hand to
reach the tonneau, and as she seated
herself it whizzed away. 1t didn't
take the right direction, but she
didn't notice this fact for a minute.
When she did she called out:
you are going wrong! You must
turn around!"
'I1l get you there, all right" was
the reply.
Then Miss Marjorie opened the
door and leaped straight out, to lose
her balance as her feet touched the
ground and fall and roll over and
over in the mud. At the same time
she screeched. 1t wasn't a dainty
little scream, but a long-drawn
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
Sad Predicament of Two Politicians

WHILE Colonel Walter Watkins Of
w Tennessee was in Washington re-
Gently he told about the sad predica-
ment two citizens Of his state got into
talking politics while travelling east
some years ago on a Pullman car, 1t
was hot night and sleep was impos-
sible. They were in the smoking
room, and fell to talking about state
affairs. While thus engaged an old
grizzled, gaunt man came in, clad as
beftted a torrid night, and began
smoking The two politicians kept up
their talk and were regretting how
poorly their state was represented at
Washington. They were somewhat
sarcastic in referring to the senate
rial delegation and declared that
younger and more vigorous men were
needed.
Looking at our senator's" was re-
marked. "They are played out. Bate
is old and Harris Is dried up and use
less"
Just then the old stranger in the
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
ONE OF MANS LIMITATIONS
He Can Work Wonders, but Finds
Difficulty In Growing Hair
on Bald Pate.

we are all weak creatures" said
Mrs. Corney, laying down a general
principle.
$50 we are" said the beadle.
Just think, for example, of the num-
Der of fabulously rich and powerful
men, including John D. himself, who
have to wear wigs. Bald heads stand
as glaring emblems of mankind's linn
itations We can slice continents in
half with great canals or push towers
higher into the heavens than the an
cient Babel, but we all feel like weak
creatures again the minute we hear
o barber saying to shiny-pated Gus
toner: TRY a little tonic, sir?"
A wonderful creative genius had
Browning, but when this great man
"experimentally" shaved off his beard
one day, le must have felt as small
and powerless as an ant to hear his
wife order: 1T must be grown again
this minute"
And 30 II 10 with none Of the up.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

corner arose and with gestures Of q
prize-fghter began to abuse and
scarify the two takers, who gaped in
wonderment. When the irate old man
subsided the politicians exclaimed:
who are you to be so upset about
our conservation"
Il am Senator Harris" said the
stranger in tones that could be heard
above the rumbling of the train, "and
have a mind to throw both Of you
out of the window"
They had not recognized the sen
ator in his pajamas in the semi-dark
ness.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

VIZ HEN George H. Covert, a sales
w man, living at the Y. NJ c. A.,
walked into the marriage license bu-
reau in City Hall the other day to
apply for the necessary paper which
would enable him to become the hus-
band of Miss Vera lone Murray, a
Washington girl, Covert was nervous
naturally. But his plunge into the
matrimonial sea, clerks of experience
say, affected him in a most unusual
way. He forgot the name of his bride
to-be.
Covert approached Clerk Kroll
shortly after three o'clock in the aft
ernoon and applied for a marriage IL
cense. The clerk obligingly issued it,
and asked no questions. Names are
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
SAYS MEN NEGLECT GIRLS
Kansas City Clubwonan Says They
Take Care of Boys, but Ignore
Needs of Future Mothers.

Kansas City.-"Men always have
taken better care Of the boys than
they have of the girls" declared Mrs.
George w. Addison, president Of the
local council Of women's clubs, in an
address to the City Club. That has
been against the boys welfare, for It
is upon the good mothers that the up
bringing of every generation of boys
depends.
Last year there were r p white
girls in the Juvenile co ere and
no organized way of carr " them
or giving them an industl train
ing"
AS the representative Of 1000 club
women here Mrs, Addison appealed to
tho City Club to assist in establish.
lng an industrial school for girls,
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

An Irishman detailed for duty at
headquarters felt his importance, and
when the colenel sent him to get a
pair of shoes, one of which was order
ed to be a size larger than the other
to allow for his gouty foot, he jumped
on the shoemaker:
You nav made one bhungle av th'
job. Shure ye were thould to make
them one larger than tn other. and
ye goes to worrlk an makes one
schmaller than tn other. But what
could ANYONE lxpict av a Dootch.
mon?
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
Industrious Navaios.

The Navajos, numbering 10000. live
in northern Arizona and northwestern
New Mexico. They occupy an area
about as large as the gt6te of Penn.
sylvania, most Of which is a desert
Here for centuries they have made
their own living by raising sheep and
goats. A part OF the wool is woven
by their industrious, resOuroefu won.
en- into the beautiful and durable
Navajo blankets, which promise to
become a fair competitor OF the Inn.
ported rug.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
How His Brother Identified Him.


Uncle Harris, an old negro, who has
been a servant in the family of Colonel
Slemmens of Monticello, Ark, for the
last forty years, recently made a trip
to Memphis. Upon his return he was
telling the colonel's daughter Of his
trip and the discovery Of a brother
whom he had not seen for thirty
years.
Miss Slemmens asked him now he
knew his brother after so long a time,
and Uncle Harris replied:
81 was walking along the street
when a spare built looking man came
up to me and says: Say, amt you
my brother? and l said, Sure l is
Who is your"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
PoLYaLoT RIVER, THE DANUBE
Noted Stream In Europe Hears Many
Tongues Spoken Along It's
Course.

Berlin, Germany.-Where is there
another river so international as the
Danube? II rises in Baden and flows
through Wurtemberg and Bavaria;
nearly half its length lies in Austria
Hungary; then II separates the latter
country and Servia At Orsova three
nationalities meet-Hungarians, Ser
vians and Roumanians; after that 1t
serves as a boundary between Rou-
mania and Bulgaria; and its mouth
lies in Roumanian territory. AS one
passes from source to mouth, strange
sounds greet the ear: first high Ger
man dialects, as Alemanic, Suabian,
and Bavarlan; then the language Of
the proud sons Of Arpad, the Mag
yars; then the Servian and Rouman-
ian and Bulgarian tongues The man
agement of the river improvement
shows the number and variety Of the
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

ness in each side, could not stand tight
clothing, and was irregular. was COM
pletely run down. On advice l took
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound and am enjoying good health. It
is now more than two years and have
not had an ache or pain since. I do ali
my own work, washing and everything,
and never have backache any more.
think your medicines is grand and praise
it to all my.neighbors. If you think my
testimony will help others you may pub
lish it. Mrs. OLLIE WooDALL, Nor
toms Gap, Kentucky.
If you have the slightest doubt
that Lydia r.. Pinkham's Vegeta-
BILE Compound will help you, write
to Lydia aE.Pinkham Medicine Co
(cOnfidentiaD Lynn, Mass, for adj
vice. Your letter will be opened,
read and answered by a woman
and held in strict confidence.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

roarious levity of some of our contem-
poraries, but rather with a sympa-
thetic- appreciation Of the stdpendous
nature of his task, that we begin to
watch the year long demonstration"
Of Chicago hair tonic manufacturer
who recently was instructed by a
municipal Solomon to prove the mer-
its Of specific by growing hair on
bald-headed policeman. - Collier's
Weekly.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
BAGKACHE
NOT A DISEASE
But a Symptom, a Danger Sig
nal Which Every Woman
Should Heed.

Backache is a symptom Of organic
weakness or arrangement. If you have
backache don't neglect it. To get per-
manent relief you must reach the root
Of the trouble. Read about Mrs. Wood
all's experience.
Morton's Gap, Kentucky. al suffered
two years with female disorders, my
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
AIpIne Flowers Of Mt. RaInIer.

Thousands Of feet above the sea
level, on Mt. Rainier, in the state Of
Washington, there is wonderful nat
nral garden Of wild flowers Some of
them grow at the very brink Of the
glaciers, and others even push their
way up through melting snow fields
In late spring. These little known
Hpecies would greatly enrich our al
pine gardens II we could find out how
o transplant and aeelimatize them,
and undoubtedly some day we shall
laavn.-Country Life in America,
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

health was very bad
and / had a continual
backache which was
simply awful. Icould
not stand on my feet
long enough to cook
a meals victuals
with out my back
nearly killing me,
and / would have
such dragging senss-
tions / could hardly
hear II 7 had sOra-
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
The Runco Game.

"You can't fool all the people all
the time"
You don't need to; If you can fool
half of the people some of the time
you can make a good living"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
Stop the Pain.

The hurt Of a burn or a cut stops when
Coles Carbolisalve is applied 1t heals
druggists For free sample write to
]. w. Cole & Co.. Black River Falls, Wis.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

use Doan's Kidney
Pills, which have
cured thousands.
j. w. Priest,
Third st., Marys'
Vile, Ohio, says:
II was in awful
condition from kid.
ney trouble, hav
ing run down in
weight from 220
TO 150 pounds. The
pains across my
back and loins
were constantly
growing worse and
kidney secretions
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

When the nervous man reaches the
top, he is apt to look around for the
FIRE escapes.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

caused untold annoyance. Doan's Kid
ney Pills cured me after doctors failed
and have had no trouble since"
when your Back is Lame, Remem.
Der the Name-DOAN'S "5Oc all stores
Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

II woman's judgment is bad she
trusts her intuition.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

Dyspeptics, despair not While there's
Garfield Tea, there's hope.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17

Boarder (excitedly)-Theres ru-
NOR afoat-
Mistress-Jennie, turn off the water
In room 4l-Judge.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1912-05-17
DOES YOUR BACK AcHEf

AoheS and TwInses Point TO Hidden
Kidney Trouble.
Have you a lame back, aching day
and night? Do you feel a sharp pain
after bending over? When the kidneys
seem sore and the action irregular,