davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
THRIFTY NAPOLEON
From Tit-Bits.

IOlll llt-iSit9s
 The Emperor Napoleon I. dressed in plain clothes, often visited the markets of Paris. in order to learn the current prices of food, and find out whether his household officers served him with honesty and economy. yn Foreign Rem iniscenees," Richard Lord Holland says that this was only one illustration of the emperor's thrift and shrewdpess.
 When the Tulleries was being repaired Napoleon suspected thar the upholsterer's charges were higher than they should be. So he asked one of his ministers who was with him how much the ivory egg at the end of the bell rope ought to cost.
 q do not know" was the answer.
 Tt shall be ascertained, said Napo- leon.
 Thereupon he cut off the ivory handle, called for a valet, bade him dress himself in plain clothes, inquire the price of such articles at several shops in Paris, and order a dozen as if for himself.
 The valet bought them for thirds of the price that the Emperor had had to pay. Napoleon. inferring that the same overcharge had been made in the other articles, deducted a third from the entire account, and informed the tradesman that it was done at his own express command, because on investigation he had found the charges to be exorbitant.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Tariff Hearings in January

MT. Underwood has studied the tar if 20 years, and he and his democratic associates will study it all through the month of January by asking all who desire to be heard on any of the fourteen schedules to appear before the ways and means committee at the capitol. Two sessions of the committee a day will be held, one beginning at 10 a. m. and the other at 8 p. m.
 Any person desiring to be heard is requested to apply to the clerk of the committee by whom an hour will be assigned for hearing to be followed by the filing of briefs. These hearings in January promise to be interesting if not exhaustive.
 MT. Underwood limits the hearings to January because in February the ways and means committee desires to prepare "a rough draft" of bill to be laid before the ways and means com- mittee of the Sixty-third Congress.
 The January hearings will no doubt constitute an interesting chapter of the coming revision of the tariff, for all who desire to speak on the tariff will be heard and, of course, reported, for all the meetings will be of pub lie nature.
 This brings revision close at hand. From January 6 the subject will re- main uppermost in mems minds, and there is prospect that the extra ses- sion will be convened March 15, in- stead of April 15. The people have decreed that the tariff shall be re- vised to a revenue basis, and the quicker it is done the better, provided of course it is well done. Under MT. Underwood's watchful eyes it will be we'll done, and the country will then have four years in which to test it. upon that test will depend the election of 1916.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
THE DUEL

By Eugene Field. The gingham dog and the calico cat, Side by side on the table sat; Twas half past twelve, and (what dc-
 you thinkO Nor one nor tother had slept wink. The old Dutch clock and the Chinese plate Appeared to know as sure as fate, There was going to be terrible spat. q wasn't there; simply state What was told to me by the Chinese
 plateD
 The gingham dog went "Bowwow-wow, And the calico cat replied "Mee-ow.' The air was filtered, an hour or so, With bits of gingham and calico. While the old Dutch clock in the chim-
 ney place Up with it's hands before its face. For it always dreaded a family row, (Now. mind, I'm only telling you What the old Dutch clock. declares is
 trueO
 The Chinese plate looked very blue, And walled, "Oh, dear! what shall We
 do?" But the gingham dog and the calico cat Widowed this way and tumbled that, Employing every tooth and claw In the awfulest way you ever saw And, oh! how the gingham and calico
 flew.
 Don't fancy I exaggerate- got my news from the Chinese plateD Next morning. where the two had sat. They found no trace of dog or cat; And some folks think, unto this day. " That burglars stole tiat pair away But the truth about the cat and pup Is this-they ate e&ctis other up. cThe old Dutch clock it told me so. And that is how I came to know9
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Great Britain's Panama Protest

Great Britain's formal note of pro- test so far as American coastwise vessels are concerned does not go very far. because Sir Edward Grey, the British minister for foreign affairs, admits that the United States pos sesses the right to pay back to such vessels all it has collected from them. The Hay-Pauncefote treaty was ratl- fled before the canal was built-be- fore we had acquired the canal zone, which has in all reason changed the entire situation. Whether it did or not, what sense is there in protesting against a provision that confessedly can be avoided by a system of re- bates? It is really no protest at all, for it points out how the very pro- vision it objects to can be carried on in the shape of subsidies to our coast wise shipping.
 Sir Edward Grey goes on, however, to object to the provision excluding railroad owned ships from the canal, because he fears this may be applied to the ships of Canadian transconti- mental railroads. It certainly would be- No railroad owned ships are to go through the canal, whether the rail road owners are home folks or Cana dians.
 Sir Edward Grey asks that the questions involved in the controversy be submitted to arbitration. This might have been possible when the lHay-Pauncefote treaty was made but it is not possible now because the canal zone is a part of the United States. The case is wholly changed by this ownership, and the Hay-Paunce fote treaty is now a misfit.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Why Our Police Fail
Current Literature.

ETOm tuIFtnl
 What is the trouble with the police system of American cities? Whom shall we blame for the failure of the Ameri- can police to cope with the growing forces of vice and crime? The recent conviction of Lieutenant Becker of New York has tended to emphasize the cor ruption within the ranks of the police force itself. Quite a different view of the situation, however, is given by Dr. HaveloclS Ellis, the distinguished English socialist and psychologist, who, in a timely essay of Immortality and the law" published in new volume or essays, analybes the American police situation at length. The police systems of the large cities in the United States, says the eminent authority, present an object lesson to the world in the fool ishness of attempting to make people moral by force. It is Just this impossible task. thinks pr. Ellis. that the American people have given their police. Our leg islators have failed to make distinction between vice and crime. The virility of our morals is in the aid of the secu- lar arm of law We Americans, more than any other people according to pr. Ellis, have believed that morality was a matter of police regulation. We have not realized that immortality cannot be encountered by physical force. We have never learned that ''the police can never become the agents of any morality of the heart" or that 'all the repression in the world can only touch the surface of life"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Modern postoffce Buildings

q see there is much interest here Tn
 the question of a new postoffice bulid-
 ing" said Matthew Boyles of Chicago. Birmingham is already quite large 1 city. but 1t is nothing to what 1t will be within the next 10 years. A visitor does
 not have to be here long to see that Bir-
 mingham is headed for the 100000 popu- lation class. It will take some years,
 I suppose, for it to get there, but 1t VIII evidently round the 100000 mark. The government should appropriate
 $1, ,5Oo,ooO to s2,0Oo,0OO for Birmingham s
 new postoffice. remember when Louis- vile had a population of only about 10O- GOO. The government spent N,00O,oo0 on
 a. public building there. The greater part
 of that building, I believe, was set apart for the postoffice. When Louisville's pop
 ulation reached 20OOO0 the s1,0o0,0O0 build ing was outgrown and a much larger ed- flee was erected.
 Tt used to be that the government rented building for the postoffiee in
 small cities-cities of less than 1000 or 5000 but now towns of 9O00 or 4oO0 have gov ernment buildings. l have seen s5O,O0O postoffice buildings in cities of less than 10000"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Wilson and His Cabinet

Nothing has leaked out so far as l know, as to Wilson's cabinet" said a prominent democrat who was once in touch with official life fin Washington. Tt may be that there has been nothing to leak out. Mir. Wilson has doubtless thought over good many names, but he will wait until he can confer with some of his close party friends before making up his mind. I suppose that early in January we will hear something defin- ite about the cabinet. I feel certain, however, that MT. Underwood will not be in the Presidents official family. for the simple reason that he is needed as leader in the House.
 Wilson's administration must stand or fall on the success of tariff for revenue only legislation. While Wilson is heartily in favor of tariff revision, and is thor oughly committed toi the declarations of the democratic platform, he hasn't the equipment or the experience for blocking out tariff measure or for guiding the party in an economic policy. Underwood Is the man for that. He is, I believe, the only man in the party who can handle the tariff question as it should be handled and at the same time hold the party to- gether in harmony.
 Tt is reasonable to say that Mir Wilson will pick out some strong men for his cabinet. It seems to be thought that Bryan will be Secretary of State, but that is only a guess"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Births and Deaths in Alabama

The bulletin of the state board of health for November is at hand. It presents vital statistics for Septem- Der. In that month there were 4012 births and 1856 deaths in this state. In Jefferson county there were 42s births and 262 deaths.
 These figures would be satisfactory if the bulletin did not discredit them on it's last page. Ten counties only re- port 90 per cent of births and deaths, leaving 57 counties that presumably report less than 90 per cent-how much less does not appear in the bull letin.
 Jefferson county's reports cover 90 per cent of births and deaths. Why should they not cover 100 per cent? Why should not the 67 counties be compelled to report all births and deaths? The vital statistics of the state are valueless when physicians and county officials are left free to re- port births and deaths as they see fit.
 The state needs set of fines to fit the cases of neglect in reporting vita statistics. The entire state should bs put in the registration area through 2 system of fines and penalties.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
TROUBLES OF THE RICH
BY BILL VINES

ter for the millionaire to please the ultimate consumer. Try as he will he never succeeds. If he spends a hund- red thousand bones to furnish excite ment and gold monogram cigarettes for few friends and allows them to slosh around in parlor furniture and champaign at the cost of S100 per slosh, he is reviled for the manner in which he blows his i'll gotten gains. If he don't spend his money he is censured as tightwad and miser. If he ponies up q campaign contribu- tion there is howl from William J. Bryan, unless he is the candidate, and | he is pointed out as one who would | subsidize the party and make slaves | of the people. He becomes the subject of congressional investigation and i is held up as a horrible example. If he refuses he is charged with lack of patriotism and called an oetipus | or some other kind of an animal. If he donate to charity or builds library or a church or offers to pension eN- Presidents he is knocked for trying to buy his way into public favor. If he don't he is condemned as a grinding and penurious robber
 | It certainly must be awful to be rich. There are attractive sides to be- ing rich, but there are other features I which robs one of many of the pleas | ures. This is one reason that l have | never become rich. 1 dread public criticism. I can spend my entire in come now without notoriety or with out causing a ripple of excitement to pervade the whole union. No one Is eX- cited when I spend my wealth except the grocery man when I pay my bill. and as he is a man of delicate consti- tuition I do not excite him much. What is the use of jumping on folks for spending their money, especially ! these folks who have so much of it. If they don't spend it in some way it
 won't be long before they will have our national currency system sewed up and dollars will be as rare as police protection in New York If they want to spend a hundred thousand on one meal, by all means let them do so and encourage them to partake of about six meals day with few $40, 900 pink teas thrown in. No one kicks
  invitation any way and of course while he is in the large and palpitating ma jorty he may be justly charged with jealousy.
 And besides that, 1t don't do any good. The rich man knows that he is in for it any way he jumps. So he goes right ahead and does exactly as he pleases and considers 1t nobodys business, and, sure enough it ain't. As a matter of fact, it ought to be a matter of national pride that we have been able in the short history of the republic to accumulate an aristocracy with the very latest and improved | hand made pedigrees-who are able to put it all over anything Europe or any of the old countries have ever done
 We have so many things to be thank full for and yet we steadfastly refuse to be thankful We are an obstinate people.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
More About Timber Question

The printer made me say 1uskegee in-
 stead of Tuscaloosa county, in speaking of the standing timber of original growth
 of pine in the Hotel Lobbies today" said
 Percy Clark. Speaking of timber and lumber I am pleased to learn that the sawmill men are in clover once more as to prices for their cuts The fact is, that all classes of lumber are bringing ante panic prices a gain. We'll the sawmill men had long,
 hard road to travel, and it did seem that
 they would not share fully in tho present tide of prosperity, but after iron climbed
 to the top notch lumber prices advanced rapidly.
 Much of the hardwood and poplar is
 being cut and shipped out of the state ia logs. I under stand that at railroad sta
 tions the timber men are getting s3o to s35 per thousand feet (board measure) for this class of logs They buy the tree
 standing and cut and haul them. This class of work requires oxen as a rule,
 and good yoke of steers fetches a good rrice. Nothing has been found to take
 the place of the OK for logging, particu-
 larly in rolling or rough country
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Greatest String Quartet

Musical circles are all agog over the chance of having the Flonzaley quartet here in January" said we'll known anna teur.
 We have had several excellent cham Der concerts by trio organiza tions-three at least-but not in recent years have we been visited by chamber band that in- cuded a string quartet. The Flonzaley quartet is not only great, but it has the reputation of being the greatest in the world. It has been organized seven or eight years, and one of it's rules is that no member is allowed to play outside of the quartet
 Another rule is that tlA quartet never gives a performance except of the leglti- mate concert sort. Owing to the wide fame of the Flonzaleys they have been in demand for so-called social functions, but all such offers are treated with dis dain. Mrs. Gotrox of New York or Bos- ton might offer them a fabulous sum to entertain her guests but she would find they were not for hire in that way. Music lovers who wish to hear them must secure a ticket to concert 'The Flonzaleys give delightful pro- grammes, and when they do come to this city the Jefferson theatre or wherever they play will doubtless be crowded"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
"I4Ouise"

From Current Literature.
 This musical novel' Is composed in five chapters, and is great as drama as well as opera. Lyricism and realism are the keynotes of Charpentiers genius, ae- cording to the writer. Carpenters aim in Louise" is explained in the com poser's own words:
 Around an action placed against a living background l wanted to paint the yearning and the enthusiasm of those 20 years of ours. when we dreamed of conquering the whole immense city and the heart of the little girl next door, whose curtains opened once in a while to let smile pass through to us. Louise is the little world of the hum ble, of the suffering, of the striving, seen passing by, with that envious, pow erty-stricken expression, and with the noise of the citys joy ringing in their ears. Louise is the heart of children forgetful of the love of their parents because of some unknown passer5y. It is as well the heart of the father WHO is no longer his property, to whom ms love alone is no longer sufficient, wo- man, creature who is no longer aufn- cient a woman who demands the right freely to choose her share of sunshine and of love- Louise is even more: it is above all the city, glittering, magic. flashing, the city that so fascinates Lou se and Julien with all it's promises un- known happiness. the city that destroys the home, and by the symbolic voices in it's streets, celebrates the hopes, the distress and the triumph of love. The city creates the atmosphere of the drama,
 ...f4 l,.aI1 ftA- mates Louise.- and vanquishes the fam ilv
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Co.Operatiye Demonstration Work

The south has deep interest in the selection of a new Secretary of Agri- culture, because under him will be conducted the demonstration work in the south. 1t is estimated that 1OO,- 900 southern farmers have been in- duced to do deep ploughing and to adopt other methods of cultivation planned by the federal department of agriculture. The boys corn clubs and the girls canning clubs are also pro- noted by the department of agricul- ture.
 A thoroughly efficient secretary could almost revolutionize farming in the south. He could get in touch with a million farmers instead of 100000, and he could bring out the possibili- ties of southern soil.
 The campaign of education already begun in the south should be greatly enlarged, and this is why southern senators and representatives are talk ing a deep interest in the appointment of competent Secretary of Agricui- ture. The farmer creates the prod ucts annually that all general business rests upon, and the feeling everywhere is that he should be prompted by fed eral educational efforts to make the most of the soil,
 In many of the states the agricul- tural colleges are cooperating with the agricultural department, and ap- propriations are made by the various legislatures to enable them to do this The state should in every possible way lend hand, and then Congress should be induced to extend demonstration work until the capacity of the soil is fully brought out.
 Much depends upon the coming Sec retary of Agriculture and all intelli- gent farmers are hopeful that prac- tical and efficient organizer will be selected by the President elect.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
RECIPES FOR LONG LIFE
From Lippincott's.

From Lippincott s.
 The late John Bigelow, the patriarch of diplomats and authors, and the no less distinguished physician and author, Dr. s. Weir Mitchell, were together, sey- eral years ago. at West Point. Dr. Bige- low was then 92, and Dr. Mitchell 80.
 The conversation turned to the subject of age. q attribute my many years, " said pr. Bigelow. ito the fact that l have been most abstemious. I have eaten sparingly. and have not used tobacco. and have taken little exercise"
 Tt is just the reverse in my case, explained Dr. Mitchell. q have eaten just as much as I wished, if I could get it; I have always used tobacco, immod- erately at times; and have always taken a great deal of exercise
 With that, NinetyTwo-Year shook his head at Eighty-Ye and said. Well, you will never live to be an old man.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16

pure veiIum-one of which was accepted by King George-20 on Japanese veiium and 40 on hand made paper, has been printed.
 According to the London Times there can be no question but that the vellum copies are the most sumptuous DOCKS ever produced in England. The careers of various watchmakers have been ln- vestigated and the catalog is said, there fore, to be an encyclopedia of European watchmakers and watchmaking.
 Speaking of watch collections, recall visit to George Pope in his palatiai home in Brooklyn about Is years ago. MT. Pope had a great penchant TOT watches. He carried three on his per- son. One was a handsome gold watch in his watch pocket. Another was mini ature watch made to order to be worn as button in the lapel of his coat. II was q perfect timepiece and cost about s'oo' When I first saw it I thought 1t was a society badge of some kind. The tnlra watch formed the head of silver chain purse for small coin. This, too, was made to order, of course, and was good tinie- keeper. In MT. Pope's house iouho collection of 15 or 20 watches. Many or them had been purchased at price in the neighborhood of $500. Two or three or them were quite historic. By this tune MT. Pope's collection may be large enough to attract public attention, and IL would not surprise me if he presented it to some public museum.
 George Pope is the brother or the late John Pope, a native of Brooklyn, but for the greater part of his life a res- ident of Richmond, Va. He was part ner of the late Lewis Ginter and with him was a pioneer in cigarette making. John Pope died at the age of 39. He was unmarried and left the bulk of his for tune to his brother George"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
FISH IN GALILEE
From the London Outlook.

From the London Outlook.
 The abundance of fish in the Sea of Galilee is to this day the wonder of travellers. Most of the fishing done by the Syrians involves the use of nets, probably identical in construction with those of the Apostles, and the best evi- dence of the fishing having through the centuries been done with nets is to be found in the ease with which most cf the fish may be deceived with the helr of any bait, natural or artificial. The pellucid water of this beautiful lake with its ever changing reflections. is in striking contrast with the muddy deeps of the Jordan. but the silt in that riv sr however unsightly to the eye, does moi seem to inconvenience the fish, whict are extraordinarily plentiful even in the lower reaches before it falls into that deathly lake which the Arabs call ths Sea of Lot.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-16
Profits of the Convict Lease Plan

Examiner Germans analysis of the profits derived by the state through the leasing of 2000 convicts, more or less, is sound except in one particu- lar. He says that one-half of the sal- aries of the solicitors and judges of the trial courts should be deducted from the convict hire. This should not be done, for offenders would be arrested, tried and convicted whether the con- victs were leased or not. In order to maintain order and the supremacy of the law criminal trials must go on indefinitely under any and all circum- stances, and for this reason no part of the cost of the criminal courts should be deducted from the sum received for the hire of convicts. When men be- come angelic in this world there will