davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
SINGING SWEET SONGS.

Former Governor Yates made a
speech IN which he advocated party
harmony. Using his own words he de-
clardd, II stand for the progress and
glory OF the United States and pros
perity and harmony OF the republican
party" He also said that the republi-
can party was suffering from too much
scolding. Considering the fact that
the ex-governor has done as much or
more fault-f1nding than any of the
other candidates in his own party. this
might be considered a case where one
man believes in one reform and that
reform to be applied to himself. If all
the republican candidates for governor
are as bad as each and every one has
already said the others are, we do
not see why Ex-Governor Yates or any
other one of the candidates would
want to be harmonious with any other
one of them.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
GOVERNOR WILSON'S CHANCES.


New York World: The World is
unable to agree with its friend Colonel
Watterson that "the Woodrow Wilson
presidential boom has started on the
down grade" Viewing the situation with
out prejudice We should say that the
governor of New Jersey is still the
leading democratic candidate for the
nomination. and that he is still the on
ly candidate who has shown strength
in all sections Of the country.
Whether Governor Wilson can main
tain this lead or whether he can obtain
two-thirds of the delegates in the ma
tional convention is quite a different
matter. The democratic contest has
been obscured by the Roosevelt-Taft
fight, but that is no misfortune Very
little attention is being paid to the
democratic aspirants. The public
knows instinctively that the action of
the democratic convention will be in
fiuenced greatly by the action of the
republican convention, and that the
main question at Baltimore is likely
to be one of availability.
! 1t Is too early to read any man into
the nomination or out of the race.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
SACRIFICING DIR. WILEY.

Retirement of DR.. Harvey w. WI
ley from the government service is,
at once, a great loss to the interests
of the people and occasion of a po-
litical scandal of far-reaching mag
nitude.
For 29 years, DR.. Wiley has occu-
pied a position of mighty and increas-
ing usefulness. There has never been
any least question of his honesty or of
his ability. And he leaves the service
with an unspotted record of personal
and official rectitude.
AS the relentless enemy of all food
prisoners, the unsparing foe of drug
frauds and the persistent advocate
and champion of pure candles for the
little folks and pure food and hon.
est medicines for all the people, he
has achieved a position worthy of all
honor.
He quits service as a martyr to
principle and a victim of a scheme
for the secretary of the department
Of agriculture 10 line up the support
OF Iowa for Mr.. Taft.
But the people will understand the
case, and the future will give him
his proper place in the list OF pub.
lie servants of ability and integrity.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
CAPITAL COMMENT

for two reasons: l. They are rich, as
class, and, like other human beings,
have no desire to pay more taxes than
necessary. 2. Protectionists know
that if this country gets into the habit
of raising revenue by taxing wealth
instead of the things the people must
have in order to live, the tariff will be
reduced to those commodities in which
they now have monopolies. If the tar
if trusts, such as the steel trust, the
sugar trust and the wooden trust, are
now allowed to dictate what the peo-
pie must pay for their products, the
enormous dividends they are now
until it is soggy, will be interfered
with. Therefore, protectionists fear
an income tax as they would a plague.
The greatest importance of the dem
ocratic program providing for the sub
stitute of tax on incomes above IS, 900
for the tax on sugar, is that it breaks
away from the tradition that the gov
ernment's expenses must be paid Who'll
ly with funds derived from a tax on
the things the people eat, wear, or use,
to be collected through customs houses
and internal revenue offices. This ira
dition is responsible for wealth not
bearing its just proportion of the bur
den of federal taxation in this country.
IL is the same tradition which has
been responsible for SO many tariff
outrages through so many years. Re
gardless Of whether the bill is vetoed
by President Taft, there is little ques
ton that the democrats have opened
the way for its enactment when some
other man is president OF the United
States.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

or your petitioners, and believe me,
you would not go wrong at that.
Many things I-e necessary 10 make
life pleasant and agreeable other than
food and drink. A little sunshine
now and then will not hurt. 1gura-
lively speaking, hence l would like
Il go through this life dropping
sparks of optimism as l wander
a-out and endeavor to break up the
monotonou. clouds that overshadoW
so many poor people on this map.
SO, %hy not consider me and send
me forth on this mission? L will aim
10 make life pleasant for the un1or-
and II in NY going about L can bring
Smile and d feeling OF good cheer
into some poor persons life, then /
VIII not have lived l. vain. Ali /
seek Is enough TO keep me in three
meals day i.:id q few cigars.
1 notice Wilson, the Governor of
New Jersey, Is inclined TO feel him
sen worthy OF doing something toI
humanity in his peculiar way He
mas good thing the way il IS. II
pays 10 be- Governor, and / don't
know why he should wish TO leave
MS post Goo only knows We need
good men In politics, and IL he can't
De OF service in this capacity, then
he would fail otherwise. Let me
know when you will list me and the
Gay you O. re me TO 60 forth on my
mission.
JOHN JAY M'DEvITT,
millionaire for q Day."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
JOIN THE CRANKS,

Chicago Health Bulletin: And our
worst pneumonia months are still be-
fore us-March and April. What will
they bring forth? II the records of
these months for former years are
maintained we shall have approx
mately 1000 more pneumonia deaths
before May rolls around. 1t is a safe
prediction that there will be few
"fresh-air cranks" numbered among
these victims. You can avoid that dis
aster yourself by joining the ranks of
these cranks. Better be live crank
than a dead mollycoddle. Learn your
lesson from the experience Of others
don't wait 10 have the painful personal
experience. Get busy now-ventilate
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
ROOF GARDEN CHURCH.

The pastor OF the First Christian
church OF Decatur proposes TO have a
roof garden on that church where ser
vices can be held in summer time IN
der the arch OF heaven. and with a
dome lighted by the stars. Whether
the suggestion will be carried out or
not remains 70 be seen. II might be
a good idea and make il possible for
churches TO have services during the
hot summer evenings with a good at
tendance, which is frequently not the
case under the present arrangement.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

You've heard about those fish stories
that our fathers and brothers and hus-
bands are SO fond of concocting.
You've probably listened to some OF
them yourself and wondered how much
truth there might be in them. Per
haps you have admired the inventive
ness of the narrator
Anyway, the teller OF those fish
stories has always been of the mas
culine persuasion. The fish story has
sort of been dedicated to man through
all the ages.
But here is a fish story told by a
woman, which bids fair to rival, If
not put in the shade, any tale yet In
vented by Ananias at his best.
Our feminine informant declares it's
true, too (just like the men do), but
well tell it as we heard it and you
can Judge for yourself.
One of our east end women has q
large and tender heart And one
Wueu BIC Icdu buC PoPOi
of the desperate condition of the poo
brought on because of the severe
weather, she decided that it was VI
to her to do something to ameliorat'
their misery.
l happened to be one of the coldes
of those very cold days that we man
aged to survive this winter. But Ma
dame East End telephoned for her cleo
trio, had it filled full of warm gar
ments intended for the unfortunate
and herself drove the machine down
town to the charity association, whicl
would place the clothes where the
would do the most good.
Madame was shivering before sh
reached downtown. When she al
rived before the associations doc
she was chilled through. Her teet
chartered so she couldn't talk and, i
alarm lest she become seriously il
one of the charity officers hastene
out and got some whisky for her.
That evening, at home, madame r.
lated her experiences, and it happene
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
A TROUBLESOME BOUNDARY.

The Mexican border line is giving
the president and statesmen in Wash
ington much trouble. Sooner or later
this may involve the United States and
the republic of Mexico in war. At times
Ike these when there Is an insurrec-
ton in Mexico. 1t Is mighty hard TO
keep the Texas people on their own
side Of the line and the Greasers on
the other side, and to make them both
behave themselves. Our authorities in
Washington have a delicate task to
look after.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
THE STATE HOUSE.

Illinois State Register: The mem
bers OF the state capitol commission of
the state OF Missouri have been in the
city looking over the state house in
the city of Springfield to get ideas for
the erection of new state house in
Missouri.
The Illinois state capitol is a well
constructed building and is as good
a building for the money as probably
any state house in the union. At the
time IL was built, however, the matter
OF hreproof construction had not ad-
vanced TO its present perfection, and
the state capitol is not as freproof as
II should be. In fact there should be
number Of changes and improve
ments made in the state capitol of ILL
nois. All the woodwork should be re-
moved from it, and the entire struc-
ture should be of stone, cement, terra
Gotta and metal. While in a general
way IL would be considered a freproof
building in the day il was built, il is
not what We expect of a hreproof
structure at the present time. A state
building which contains so many valu-
able documents and papers as the state
capitol building, ought to be far be-
yond ordinary buildings in the matter
OF being fireproof. 1t is only about a
year ago that a very disastrous fire
occurred in the state capitol building
at Albany, y. Y. and destroyed docu-
ments, papers and books Of inestima BILE
value. This should not occur in the
state of Illinois, and means should be
taken 20 make the capitol Of this state
absolutely hreproof
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
TALKS tuit--
WOMEN PEADEPS
b0
Edna K.WOo1Q1

that her 6-year-old son heard the mar
rative.
1t also happened that the furnace
fire went out that night and in conse-
quence the water pipes and everything
else freezable were frozen solid next
morning.
Now here is where the fish story
commences, and I'm going to quote
the rest
Even the water in the gold fish
bowl was frozen" said the feminine
teller of this tale.
The gold fish belonged to the little
boy, and when he found them frozen
his little heart was nearly broken.
Then he remembered his mothers
story Of the evening before, and il
struck him that If whisky had done
his mother so much good, when she
was nearly frozen, it ought to do the
fish the same amount of good.
so he distracted from the family
medicine chest the bottle Of emergen
cy whisky, and poured some OF the
spirits into the gold fish bowl.
1T didn't seem to have any effect
on the fish which appeared to be quite
dead.
Then the little fellow reached int
the bowl and took out one Of the fish
He pried its mouth open, ant
poured in a few drops of the whisk!
and put the fish back into the bowl
He did this with each one of the fish
And l want to tell you that it wasn't
five minutes before every one of thos'
gold fish was cutting up something
awful in that bowl Of water
What's more, every one Of them i
alive today and swimming around a
if nothing had ever happened to them
And if you don't believe it, you Cal
go out to Madame's house and loo
at the identical fish that were resul
rected, enjoying life in the very sam
bowl in which they were found froze
solid on that below zero morning"
Now l leave it to you: Isn't that
pretty good fish story even if it wa
told by woman:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Miss Maude Lillian Berri, the ac-
tress. has introduced a new idea in
visiting home. Her mother heard that
che was i'll and wanted to see her very
much. Miss Maude could not spare
the time to go TO California where her
mother was. so she made arrange
ments with a firm that manufactures
films and has sent TO her mother a
series Of moving pictures showing her
self driving an automobile, skating,
playing with her dog, etc. While this
is a somewhat expensive way of Wis
iting II is probably cheaper than go
ing 1000 miles and back on a railway
train, and losing time all the way.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
The Argus Daily Story
q Ar Ocean Mystery-By Willard Brakeman.
Copyrighted. 1911 by Associated Literary Bureau

On one of my voyages across the
Atlantic I became quite chummy with
one Of the officers, who told me the
following incident that had happened
at sea under his observation:
zone sailing day I was leaning over
the rail on the upper deck watching
some baggage being lifted aboard
when a carriage drove up and two Ia
dies got out and came up the gang
way. They were evidently mother
and daughter, the younger being about
twenty years of age. There was moth
ing especially noticeable about them
except that the young lady struck me
as being very beautiful. 1 mean that
there was something winning in her
appearance.
During the trip from New York to
Liverpool 1 never saw the young lady
on deck except with her mother. The
old lady got quite thick with one of
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

1t Is easy enough to make a man
think you have faith in him until he
strikes you for loan.
Paying as he goes along will ordi-
narily keep a man from hitting up the
pace.
The man who will not take another's
dust has to dust along himself.
For mere creatures of day some
fellows manage to make the night
howl hideously.
The man who demands consideration
for the things he meant to do need
never worry as to how he will manage
the boss job.
1t is seldom worth while to make
mistake just for the sake of what you
will learn by it.
Men often love their work too well
to take a vacation. but never too well
to take pay.
People who are swept by passion are
sometimes busted by the law.
Sometimes we would rather keep our
cake than eat it.
Half loaf il better than no bread
unless 1t Is only half baked.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
ROAD MAKING IN ILLINOIS.

Chicago Tribune: The curse of
country roads Is amateur roadmaking.
RoadmAking in billy or mountainous
country has its problems, but no less
has the roadmakins OF our soft prairie
region. II cannot be left TO the hap
hazard, slovenly and experimental
methods now prevailing, the casual
work Of many hears and many hands.
The natural conservation Of farming
districts has delayed q full realization
OF what good roads mean not only TO
the pocket but TO the opportunity for
social pleasure. The automobile is
raising the standard rapidly. however.
and the good roads propaganda, now as
wide as the nation. is stimulating in
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

sugar tax from the
breakfast table to
the shouldern of
the wealthy? Are
the people suftici-
emily in control to
acco m pills h this
end? These ques-
tiOns are being ask
ed everywhere. The
status of the situa-
ton is this: The
democratic house,
IN keeping with its
promise to reduce
the cost of living,
will at this session
pass a bill repeal.
ing the $50, 600, 900
annual tax on su.
gar, reducing the
price of this com.
modify nearly two
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

terest and concentrating on means.
That over 500 delegates from Illinois
and Iowa alone came to Chicago for a
conference shows great progress in
this movement
In Illinois the faults of our system,
II It can be called a system, are plain,
and the chief absence of unified con-
troll and scientific method. Legislation
is proposed to have the state under.
take roads improvement with experts
to direct and oversee. We shall get
nowhere until this is accomplished.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

A funeral service unique in all
history took place when the shatter-
ed old hulk of the famous warship
Maine was consigned to ocean burial.
In the spirit of all that such a cere-
mony means the whole country
Joined. Immortality will be accord
ed to the memory OF the buried ship
remember the Maine"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
Humor and
Philosophy
THE MYSTERY.
~ DUNCAN ~. SMITH

T SIT and smoke my fat cigar
And put my troubles all afar
Or, with my pipe between my teeth,
Blow In the skies a pretty wreath
Draw in q pufr OF smoke and then
Proceed to blow it out again
And thus watch the moments fly.
wonder why.
IT'S not that smoke is food and drink,
Nor will 1t cause my debts to shrink;
It does not buy me hats and shoes,
Nor yet the lack of them excuse;
1t Will not cause the grocer man
To further try the credit plan.
But stiIl do not let 1t die.
wonder why.
Tobacco does not clear the brain
Nor make the knotty problems plain:
1t doesn't make the teeth look white
Nor help me when 1 want to write:
1t doesn't aid the appetite
Nor make me better sleep at night,
But still 1 smoke the full supply.
I wonder why.
1t does not help me win bride,
Nor can 1t be on debts applied:
1t does not help me to succeed,
But harm enough is in the weed;
No benefit can collect
From 1t direct or indirect,
And yet at it never shy.
wonder why.
Explained.
"Heard the latest scandal
REALLY? No"
How does that cemeTf
Don't you know?"
mo"
'It has been a long time since
Jaw you"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

cents a pound. Then another bill will
be passed taxing incomes in excess of
$1,000. The bills will go to a republi-
can senate. II the progressive repub-
licans vote with the democrats, both
bills will pass the upper body.
The fate of the two measures will
then rest with the president If Mr..
Taft accepts the advice of those about
him, who were described by the late
Senator Dolliver as being men who
know exactly what they want" he will
veto the bills.
Protectionists oppose an income tax
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Fund Bureau
AcDevitt got rid
Of his last cent by
play and Is now q
candidate for Con-
gress, b a C K e d
chiefly by b ! 5
nerve. he sent q
letter TO the Pen
sion Fund-Bureau
saying:
III you feel that
you are doing a
good and worthy
work in assisting
men who 10 your
satisfaction are
factors in tn G
worlds develop
ment for good,
then ] would sug-
gest in my own
modest way that
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

The way Taft is gathering in the
delegates It looks as though Mr.. Roose-
welt wouldn't have things all his own
way. Even "Old Bill" appears to have
a few friends left who are working
for him, and perhaps for themselves
at the same time.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

late court Saturday. Attorneys Seth
+. Crews and George F. Ort, who were
counsel for Mrs. Lavender, filed objec-
ton TO the dismissal of the suit, claim
ing that they had lien on the judg-
ment Of $4,000 obtained in a lower
court by Mrs. Lavender. Dr. Craw-
ford had appealed the case to the ap-
pellate court
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
COURT REFUSES TO END
SUIT OF MRS. LAVENDER

Chicago, March 1S.-The motion of
Mrs Mary a Lavender, Gag Wood
lawn avenue, to have her suit against
Rev. E. B. Crawford. former pastor Of
the Woodlawn Park Methodist church,
dismissed, was denied by the appel
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

you give me j. j. McDeyitt.
l0okn 1 have long ago concluded
more than an aimIess existenre
ana IL you. with your unlimited
wealth. woulC deviate slightly from
what you lave in mind and consider
my philosophy am thoroughly salts
ned that you would list me as one
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Voters in New York have good rea-
son for protest against the long bal
lot" In one congressional district,
for instance. the man who desires to
make known his preferences for off,
GERS 20 be chosen will be called upon
TO manipulate a piece of paper, in
ballot form, Il feet in length,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
March 1S in American
History.

17s2-John Caldwell Calhoun. Ameri-
can statesman and leader In ths
''old SOUTH born: died 1850.
grandson Of Alexander Hamilton
and veteran of the Mexica6 and
civil wars. died: born 1920.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

A Probable Reason.
"You notice he took his wife off into
a corner before going away"
ITO kiss her goodby, suppose"
more likely" said the old ROUGH,
ito try to borrow money from her."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

John Bull can't find it in his heart
10 be hard on the ladies even though
they slap him in the face and practical
~ demand that he hit back.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Cured by Similar Treatment.
"It was a packed jury, but luckily
the judge discovered it"
And what did he do?"
Canned it"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Amundsen says there are vast piles
Of coal at the south pole. Betcher ].
Pierpont Morgan has his eyes south
poleward.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
WiIIino to Hello.

Mr. Bacon-It is said it would take
a man working eight hours day over
ninety years to count and stack a
billion dollars at the rate of dollar a
second. Mrs. Bacon-Don't worry
about 1t, dear. II you ever get II I'll
promise to help you count it-Yonkers
Statesman.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
millionaire for a Day
Wants Carnegie Pension

wv ILKEs-BARRE, March g.
Wv John Jay McDevitt known as
Butch" and as a millionaire for a
day" feels he has done something
10 warrant recognition from the
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Tangier-Sultan Mulai Hafd, who
has been suffering from severe ner-
vous affection, recently announced
his intention to abdicate and leave
the palace. He was persuaded, how
ever, to reconsider his decision.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

The Reason.
"Women don't like to argue.-
"Why not?"
ways presupposes that they give the
other fellow a chance to talk once in
awhile"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

n the worse comes to the worse.
what's the matter with carrying Goals
from Newcastle?"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18
Contrary

Contrary.
81 can predict the weather a week
ahead"
why don't you do it them"
81 do"
"But it doesn't stay predicted"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Dr.. Sun must have seen the clouds
and forsook the danger zone
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Don't fret! II the threatened strike
produces a coal famine, we can burn
coke
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Though a small country, Amundsen
makes Norway show large on the map.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

BY the Football Route.
81 understand your son is working
his way through college"
mo; he is kicking his way"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Though there may be a baseball
trust, we still trust the umpire.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-03-18

Sizing Him Up.
"He says he is hungry for love"
maybe he is. but ! noticed that II
did not affect his appetite for mas
friend chicken"