The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-02-05
". R. Rose in the Cleveland Plain Dealer. IN FIFTY years ago today Artemus T Ward came back

 H FIFTY years ago today Artemus Ward came back.
 A He left the Plain Dealer staff in November, 1S6O to seek his fortune as a literary free lance, with a strong in- elination toward the lecture platform, and he sojourned among the bright lights of the Gotham of that day, and fared on both husks and ambrosia, and gathered | fame with his hard knocks, and in Jan
 uary, 1862, came back to the town that
 was now glad to claim a large share in
 his steadily growing renown.
 He had gone away with the dissuad-
 ing tones of his friends ringing in his ears; he came back to find every hand optstretched to greet him.
 On the evening of January 3t, 1862, he delivered his lecture, "The Children in the | Wood" at the Academy of Music. Of this lecture the New York Evening Post had I said few months before: An excellent | lecture was delivered last evening at the Mercantile library, to a crowded house, | by MT Brown, better known as 'Artemus | Ward The subject was fChildren in the Wood, which was treated with much drol- lery and produced a great deal of amuse- ment." Later on the lecture was given in a Rochester theatre, and this enabled Artemus to tell his Cleveland friends that the audience was in tiers during the en- tire evening-whch may have been the | first time this pleasing and harmless bit of word play was exploited.
 | In the local announcement of the lec- ture it was stated that "The Soldiers Aid society announce with pleasure that Ar temus Ward MT. Charles F. Browne, the distinguished humorist, and Great Amer | ican snowman, has been engaged to | give one of his inimitable lecture in Cleve- land, for the benefit of this organization | Subject, The Children in the Wood Ad- mission, p cents."
 1 There was a bazar or fair in progress at the time of the leeture-a charitable means of raising money for the Cleveland Orphan asylum-and this bazar. out of compliment to the lecturer, closed it's doors during the two hours of the enter tainment.
 l The lecture was given in the Academy
 of Music, Bank street, the dramatic com-
 pany taking a night off, and that fairly spacious auditorium was crowded. The i doors were opened at o'clock and the 1 house was filled long before the hour for
 the lecture, even the stage being thronged with listeners.
 1 It is stated that in harmony with the i title of the discourse, the stage was set 1 to resemble forest, fact which might have seemed somewhat incongrous to those occupying stage seats.
 Anyway, it wassa tremendous welcome l for the wanderer.
 l The lecturer was introduced by George A. Benedict, editor in chief of the Cleve- land Herald, with a few complimentary remarks which, unfortunately, were not 1 preserved. We are told that Artemus, his
 hair curled and his new evening clothes
 fitting admirably. was entirely self pos sessed. delivering his lecture with gray l ity that added to the ludicrous effect of
 the rapid fire drolleries he continuously cut loose.
 1 Of course, the audience speedily found l that this was not a lecture at all. They were used to lectures educational. moral efforts, but this was something entirely different. This spare young man with
 the aquiline nose and the quaint drawl, was not featuring, he was merely talking he was uttering nonsense of the most ir-
 relevant kind, and uttering it with the air
 of orie who brides himself on the value of his discourse.
 He talked of countless things. from
 cabbages to kings and spiced his al-
 lusions with satire and anecdote, and in- consequential drolleres.
 l He ridiculed the politicians and had his | thrust at Bull Run, which evidently was
 still looked upon as a serio-comic en- 1 gagement. He said, in explanation of the Manansas panic: Just as the eagle
 of victory, like a good bird, was about
 to perch upon our banner, someone ap- peared upon the field of battle with the news that there were three vacancies in the New York custom house'' Then he attacked the alleged moral re- | formers, calling them lazy and useless. why" he cried in a fine burst of indig- nation, they would even rob the old man who sits in his chimner corner of sas pipe of clay Tobacco,' observes one of these reformers, will kill dog. Well, let us not give our dogs tobacco. then. By that means we may save them.' Later on Artemus, urged upon beginners in life's work the necessity of natural ness. and added that the larks larked, the swallows swallowed, and the bees bewaxed Macbeth murdered sleep, and as a beautiful example of the law or compensation. the actors murder Macbeth every nightv' Then in his quaint way he interrupted himself: T must say,' he broke in, that the treatment Duncan re- ceived from Macbeth was quite inhos- pitabIe, and if anything of the kind should occur in my house would feel real nor tifed-"
 It was not until the close of the eve