Abilene weekly reflector. [volume] (Abilene, Kan.) 1888-1935, 1912-08-15

/ once knew a man who let his
wife go Visiting to her folks. The
first week she was there he took
the home paper and cut ont . piece
and sent the paper to her. She won
dered and wondered and wondered.
The next week he did the same
thing. she at once packed her teles-
cope and hurried home. He told
her It was only joke, and he smiled
behind her back for week.
! know q man who Is always talk
ing about tainted money. but he lets
no opportunity slip by to grab a
dollar any old way he can get It.
AHe says he has method of removing
the faint.
When / am out wandering around
town and mixing with the brethren
run across thousand good texts
for sermons, but when / get ready
TO prepare the discourse can't think
of a blamed thing to say.
- -
once had lady friend who gave
me her photograph without saying:
1T isn't bit good"
- -
A grasshopper can jump two hun
dred times it's own length, but that
lust about equals the ratio at which
some men outstrip their bank ac-
count.
Too many fellows make a gum
shoe campaign when they start out
to look for work.
have watched the thing pretty
closely for some time and I can't see
that the fellows who love their
neighbors like themselves are getting
along any better than the other peo-
pie. / know a man who let's one
of his neighbors smite him on each
cheek twice a day. The smiter Is
getting altogether the best of the
game. The other fellow, poor devil,
is the laughing stock of the COM
munity. He gets 1t in the neck every
time. People know he won't fight
back and they impose on him. May
be they had different neighbors in
the days of two thousand years ago,
but it is certain that such system
will not work now. Even our min
lister doesn't do it that way. ! know
we had a deacon in our church who
always was knocking on the preach
er. The preacher didn't go to him
{ and put his arm around him and
tell him how he loved him. Not he,
He plugged some of the other dea-
icons and when the annual church
election occurred the deacon who
was doing the knocking found him
self out Of a Job. Then his wife
1.-THE minister'sJ had some OF the
sisters spread the story of his win
dication." That's about the way the
average man Of today loves his neigh
Dor as himself.
Every community has man or
two Of whom the neighbors say: IT
If wasn't for his wife he would
starve to DEATH"
This is an age of rapid progress.
Even the young men who have own
ed automobiles but few weeks are
getting SO they can drive them with
one hand when the occasion arises
Some girls become old maids from
choice, some because they can't nelp
Il and some because they didnt
care to hook up with any one OF the
six or eight worthless dubs VINO
Wanted them.
One of the pet theories OF an old
maid is that If she. were boss she
would make the neighbours kids stand
around and obey and have the old
man home on time for his meals.
- y
often wonder how things are
going to be around here in a hum
dred years from now. | would like
to walk down the street some even
ing the year 2O12 and see what the
inhabitants have to say. know l
would meet the familiar old pessi-
mist who would say: well, corn
Is about gone. Unless we get rain
tomorrow there won't be even fod-
der."q would see the young fellow