Oxford eagle., 1912-07-25
The Captains Reply

". Z. Ne.ll.
A Few Words in Regard 10 the
Noted Dreamer.
/ \ few words in regard 10 tee
Noted Dreamer. / happened 10
meet the noted dreamer on the
square the other day and he said
shat he was tired Of foo,ing with
the doctors who had previously
advised him and wanted to try a
Horse Doctor. kindly took him
IN the stable and there made a
careful diagnosis Of his case.
Now You al. know Il won't do for
a horse doctor 70 tell everything
he knows, but % surprise found
him suffering with. not only the
hookworm. but actually found
ticks on him, besides these he had
some tampany. caused from the
0uttermilk and onions, immedi-
ateiy gave him an injection Of
HypoGermatilly, Physosti-mIne
about . grains, which relieves al!
intestinal obstructions and in
creases gastric and intestinal per
istalsis and directed him to Dr.
Neft, the tick doctor. who will of
dourse dip him with the yearlinss
July 26tb.
Noted Dreamer: You Will then
oe rec1uductea around u the
stable for further operations.
Yours for perfect health and
sweet dreams. Horse Doctor.
Last Thursday night was one
of those hot otnights you read about
in the Bible. | took as thick a
quilt A. | could iind on the place
and spread it down on the floor
OK the back porch. | just thought
| would have good night to
dream about Joe Parks coed
roads il Beat No. >. just had
dropped off to sleep and was
dTesining Of going from the old
Borum place to Rocky Ford. /
mad gone about me mile and had
passed over bitches, gullies aud
almost impassab,e holes in the
road. Then I came to an impas-
sable gull. it looked 10 be about
40 feet wide and % feet deep and
no way in the world around it. So
| began looking around ard di-
rectly | saw q grape vine fasten-
ed to tree about 10 feet high and
at the bottom end of this vine |
saw directions posted on it, that
IS how to use it. The directions
said 10 take the vine and 90 back
about about 20 steps and take a
running start and swing to the 9th
er side OF this gulf. did SO, but in
swinging over to the other side |
thought | was falling in my sleep
and this woke me up. Then /
took in my surroundings I saw
that | was surrounded by about
200 poor, lean, lank MOSQUITOES
huddled around me like drove
OF partridges around an oat stack
they were grating their teeth and
sharpening up their peg in ais"
and singing all parts of music and
II there are any other parts they
were singing that too. They had
a very dissatisfied looking coun-
tenance and really looked vicious
Do you know that a mosquito has
the best set OF working tools of
anything | ever saw. He has a
peg in all, coal chisel hand
saw and grind rock to always
Seep his tools as sharp as a razor.
lie has an automatic pump and
knows how to work it to perfec-
ton. Now these mosquitoes seem
ed to be in a deep conversation
aoeu something and | just sup
posed they were talking a oout me
/ 1t Is little unpleasant to have
things" talking about you right
before your face. Especially in
the dark. Just about this time |
felt about two dozen fleas on me.
Tney were turning double somer-
saults and seemed to be verv
lucky in always lighting on their
mouths. Every time one of them
would turn a somersaultands strike
with his mouth, he would snap
MS teeth like sparrow hawk. I
could have stood the fleas alright
If they would set still, but these
fleas seemed to be the worst dis
satisfied and the most restless
heas | ever saw. Now here came
along drove of cockroaches and
and they seemed to want to make
a bed in my hair, they were large
as oak leaves and looked to be in
very good order, but the rattling
of their feet and legs in running
over me was ''leetle'' uncom
Portable to say the least of it.
Now the rats seemed to be hay
ing a meeting of some kind that
night, 1t must be they had party,
ball or dance of some kind, they
seemed TO be playing snap, this
IS game we young folks use to
play when we were young and |
just thought from the sound thew
were making that they must be
playing this game. BY this time
1t was 10 the wee hours" OF night
and two or three old roosters be-
gan to crow just like they were
getting over a bad spell Of dipthe
ria, then 70 cap the climax all this
trouble was inter5persed now and