davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Hurnor and
Philosophy
D. DUNCAN ~. SMITH
OMAR KHAYYAM.

HAVE you turned Omar inside out
- And wondered what twas all about
And vowed that you would read and ses
Some time when you were feeling stout?
Some persons who have got the bug
Will talk about the loaf and Jug
The book Of poems and the bough,
All mixed together safe and snug.
But should you ask them what's the rest
They couldn't, were the truth confessed,
Give explanation that would stand
A thorough civil service test.
It sens that Omar was a chap
Who didn't care a single rap
How many hours he didn't work
And who preferred to take q nap.
Philosophy was his one whirn.
The wise professors he could trim,
And he would argue 1t for days.
Just so the drinks were not on him.
Then he would turn TO rock and rye.
Were he among US now he'd move
From any village that went dry.
And. as gather from the tale,
If he escaped the frowning jail
l fear the cops would say to him:
Come, beat II, Omar. There's the trail"
That's what in skimming 1t get.
own 1 haven't read it yet
To find If am right or wrong,
Nor will I read it; that's bet.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
ENGLAND'S EMIGRATION.

The stream OF emigrants from Eng
land which is setting out east and west
is increasing in volume. every day.
thousands OF British men and women
are going 10 seek their fortunes in the
colonies and every berth on the liners
; that carry emigrants is reported TO be
engaged up 10 the end OF May. a Lon
don letter 10 the Christian Science
Monitor says.
An emigration agent for the Cana.
dian Northern railway has been tour
ing England 70 distribute 25 600 free
farms and at the same time To per-
suade farmers who know their bus;-
ness and domestic servants 10 leave
this country for the dominions over
seas. He will leave England for Sas.
kstchewan on the Royal George. &C
companied by an enormous party of
farm hands. who will fill the vessel 10
its utmost capacity.
He told a representative of the
standard that the best men have come
from the west and east OF England
and are a fine type, and that they have
few from the lower midlands and q
few from the north in the party No
less than 25.000 are going out to farms
under the charge OF g guide, carrying
letters Of introduction 70 the govern
ment representatives, who will dis
patch them 70 the various territories
where farms are located.
These who deal with the emigration
question find that every year more
and more people of a better class who
possess a little capital are going out
TO the colonies, many OF the yeomar
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
AW0MANyOBSERWATTONS


in your immediate vicinity. Clean up.
Keep cleaned up. Allow no manure
or garbage about your house. Use
plenty of soap and water inside Of the
house. Teach the children the value
Of cleanliness Teach them, also, not
10 leave doors open, so that when the
screen door is UP they will be thought
ful enough TO close it when they go in
or out.
Keep all foods covered, for If there
is no filth around flies will feed on
your edibles and infect them with
disease.
And, for goodness sake, screen your
house from attic to cellar. Leave no
way Of ingress for the fly and you
will have no cause to complain of his
company.
Too many people are stingy about
screens. Stinginess in screens means
either that you are not getting suffl-
cient air into your house because you
dare not open unscreened doors and
windows, or that you are letting in
! filth and disease with the flies when
the unscreened windows and doors
are open.
If you can't afford good wire screens
fitted to every window, tack netting
across the window frames. Its cheap
and will last until cold weather kills
the flies.
1t is not necessary to fill the house
with nasty fiytraps. poisoned flypapel
or to organize the children into a swat
ting brigade. Keep the flies out Of
the house and keep the place clean
that's all.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

advantage lies in having laws drawn
for the special benefit Of one man, or
group Of men, is shown in the case
of the Standard Oil magnate. Aided
by laws which gave him the right
to collect rebates from the railroads.
a privilege which was denied 10 all
his comprehension by a tariff wall
which enabled him to build up mon
opoly without fear of competition from
abroad, this pet of the high protective
system has built up a fortune which
is now estimated TO be 100000, 900.
From this industry, which the high
tariff advocates still refer to as one
of those infants" still in need of a
protective tariff, John d. Rockefeller
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Cchicago Record-HeraldD

Friends of the principle Of non
partisan, independent judiciary have
cause for graduation and rejoicing in
the result OF the election in the fourth
judicial district. Il cannot be doubted,
in view of the surprisingly large ma
jority obtained by Justice Cooke, that
his victory is due largely TO repuJl>- ali
and independent citizens who fully az
preciated the Jolly and danger OF apply.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Is WattersOn Wasting Time?

That may happen to Mr.. Roosevelt,
and the thought Of it may not unreas-
onably impel people to secure to him
a less arduous live than he would
select for himself. But he is very
strong; his habits of life and of rec
reation are very good; he does not
dTilk too much-it is probable that
he could stand a great deal of wear
and tear without making his reason
ing faculties any more irregular than
they are at present.
Moreover, if he were crazy would
he he any less acceptable to the citi-
zens who want him?
We think not. Taking him, they
probably would not mind a little de-
mentia more or less, provided the
noises proceeding from it were in har-
mOny with the remarkable sounds TO
which their ears are now attuned. If
Mr.. Roosevelt got aphasia, that would
stop the show, but paranoia, or mega.
lomania, or any such specialties of
the alienists, would not affect his
hold on his public except to make
his supporters more enthusiastic.
Mr. WattersOn is wasting time in his
diagnoses. 1t is as our neighbor, the
World, says:
Mr.. Roosevelt's state Of mind may
form an interesting subject for the
discussion Of alienists, but the>main is
sue is not whether Theodore Roose
welt is insane, but whether the Ameri
man people are insane. In their hands
not in his, rest the destinies OF the re
public"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
June 5 in American
History.

1S51-The first chap,er OI Uncle
Toms Cabin" Harriet Bcecher
Stoves auti-slavery novel. appear
ed in the National Era at Washing
ton.
1s92-On City and Titusylile. Pa, dew
astated by fire created with burn
ing oil. 800 lives being lost.
1s97-Rear Admiral Samuel p. Lee. Y.
S. ". retired. last Of the civil war
commanders OF great squadrOns,
died, born 1872.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

Some men let their eyesight CON
siderably exceed their dexterity. That's
why they enjoy standing round and
grinning at the fool chasers.
OF course widows may and do marry.
But none was ever able to beat
widower TO it
Gossip may be publicly tabOoed. but
it has much encoura cement on the sly.
The best way TO get rid of a sus-
picion is to go after it and invite it
out into the open.
1t Is lot easier to deserve what you
get than TO be satisfied with it.
The older a woman grows the more
dissatisfied she becomes with the re-
Elections of her mirror.
Some women talk all the time under
the mistaken impression that they ara
keeping their neighbors from it.
Many a timid man has had the cour-
age to marry and has been scared 10
death at his own bOldness the rest OF
his days.
Many a platonic friendship heads
merrily for the divorce court under the
misconceptiOn that II is going straight
into the state of cooperative cOmpan
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

coed against them
through "dissolu-
ton" suits, instead
Of with laws to
squeeze the water
out of their over
capitalized corpor-
atoms, or by cut
ting down the tar
if through which
they pile up
wealth, is shown
by the fact that
JONI u. hOChGiGl-
Ter is worth fully
$1OO,OO0,OOO more
now than he was
before the United
States supreme
court dissolved"
the Standard Oil
company.
Just where the
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

Abot
Nobody likes to think Of flies. But
the best way not TO be compelled TO
think about them a whole lot later
on is TO do a little advance thinking
now.
We hear a good deal about fly traps
right now. The other day, in a maya
zine, was a picture Of boy and heap
of flies, and a fly trap which the boy
had used to catch the flies. There were
something like $4,000 flies in that heap.
The boy won a prize of s25 offered for
the largest catch of flies
Fly traps and fly swatters, of course,
have their use. But they are the
pound of cure" Wouldn't it be far
better not to have so many flies to
catch or swat?
Here is the ounce of prevention
Don't give the flies a chance to breed
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

farmers being able TO travel first class.
Since January nearly $4,000 people
have appealed for emigration book
ings, thus this years record is likely
TO exceed last years by about 5000.
Thousands Of men and women are
making their way TO Canada and as
many more are sailing TO Australia
and New Zealand.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
How He Proved lt.

How He Proved Ii.
care you progressive or conserva-
tiveY
Progressive. most certainly"
Good. Then you'll vote in favor of
having senators elected by the people?"
81 don't know about that"
"Why notY'
"Well, you see, all of our best SEN
ators have always been elected by the
state legislatures"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

Does the presence of the Indiana lead
er in charge of the republican conven-
ton arrangements in Chicago mean
that there is TO be a New deal?
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
THE ARGUS.

Published Daily and Weekly at 1924
Second avenue. Rock Island, IL. en-
tered at the postofice as second-class
matter.)
Rock Island Member OF the Associated
Press.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
CAPITAL COMMENT
Y CLYDE n. TAVENNER.

BY CLYDE II. TAVENNER.
Especial Correspondence of The Argus)
Washington, June 3.-The advantage
to the privileged millionaires Of this
country of having the government pro-
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Storms of Life.

The nobIest characters are those who
have steered the life saving vessel
through storm tossed seas. 4 bed Of
down never nurtured a great soldier
yet.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

Just 70 be exact, Fulton county
gave Cooke a plurality Of 500 over
Grier, according 70 the official figures.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

He who stops swatting is a friend
OF the fly and the fly is mankind g
enemy.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

A medical journal says candy is good
for children, but the children knew IL
first.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

His Limitation.
You'll never make any noise in the
world"
'I'll bet / will"
"Well, maybe. Perhaps you may at
tain to second bass in the anvil chorus"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
DEGREES,

Degrees.
"Do you know Mary Long,"
"Pretty we'll"
'Just what do you mean by pretty
well?"
81 know her we'll enough TO borrow
her gloves. but not well enough to tell
her that her switch doesn't match"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Fooled Then

Fooled Them.
The boy stood on the burning deck,
And all the honest shippers
Were much surprised; they didn't know
He wore asbestos slippers.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

II is success 10 lose the approval of
fools.-kurai.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

The steam roller is fred UP, ready
for action at Chicago.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
BY THE J. w. POTTER co.

TERNs.-Dafly. 10 cents per week
Weekly. 81 per year in advance.
Complaints OF delivery service should
be made 10 the circulation department
which should also be notified IN every
instance where II is desired 10 have
paper discontinued. as carriers have no
authority In the premises.
All communications OF srgumentative
character. political or religious, must
have real namo attached for publ:ca-
ton. No such articles Will be printed
over fictitious signatures.
Telephones IN all departments: Cen
trail Union. West I45. ll45 and 2l45;
Union Electric, 5i45.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05
Practical.

"Oh. dear, 1t is raining cats and
dogs
Now, if we only had a sausage ma
chinew
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-06-05

OF course widows may and do marry.
But none was ever able to beat a
widower 10 it
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31
schools for Working Girls.

Two large Chicago department
stores are to give their armies OF
feminine employees half day each
week TO attend q technical training
school for girls. where the rudiments
OF English. arithmetic. textiles. do
nestle science and other useful
branches are to be taught them.
This move. II taken full advantage
OF, will doubtless yield handsome re-
suits both TO the employer and en-
plcye. 1t should make the latter
much more efficient in the store and
out. deepen her appreciation OF bust
ness and OF her own place in the
world. 1t will not be long, We
imagine. until similar steps are taken
by other large employers.
Many boys and girls are forced to
leave school early to become wage
earners. To certain extent. their
employers become their sponsors.
where they are willing to accept the
responsibility. as in this case. they
perform q social service quite deserv-
ing Of the name. and society gets the
benefit Of this mutual relation OBJ
tanning between employer and en-
ploye In the form of intelligent and
capable service.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31
SQUEEZE OF THE COAL BARoNs

ST. Louis Globe Democrat: Anthracite
coal. it is said, will be advanced slZooo. 600.
half of which will be paid to miners. The
other half will be the usual compliment
to consumers.
New York World: The anthracite OPP
orators were really very considersts in
raising the price Of coal so soon. because
they knew that by next winter the cor
sumner would have time 10 save the
extra money to pay the increase in price.
the Reading. expressed to the miners fear
Of drastic legislation IL the prices Of coal
were arbitrarily raised. His suggestion
OF drastic legislation is one which may.
unwittinsiy on his part. commend itself
TO the public through its legislative rep
resentatives.
Washington Star: Time was when there
~as pretense that the cost OF read
tustment fell upon the employers. but con-
sumers are educated beyond that fallacy
and understand perfectly that 1t is
economic law that they should pay their
share Of the increased costs Of production
whether the advance is in the price Of
labor or materials. But IT does not follow
that the coal producers should take sd-
vantage Of every change In the pay scale.
especially when It follows 9 widely ad-
vertised disagreement. to add to the re-
tail price disproportionately.
Springfield Republican,: II is admitted
by a prominent coal operator who served
on the anthracite strike committee that
the advance Of 5 cents q ton to the con-
sumer will not only meet the requirements
Of the wage increase but also put an addi-
tionsl 100000 into the coal companies
treasures. The defense OF the sLooo. 900
tribute thus wrung from the public for
the special benefit of the coal combine
and the stockholders is that profits In
recent years have been narrowed because
Of "the increased cost OF mining material"
Yet II seems ridiculous to ask the public
to believe that the profits OF the business
have shrunken to point where the COM
panies must have more revenue from the
consumer per ton Of coal.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31

Middle western railroads. espe-
cially those operating in Nebraska.
Kansas and Oklahoma. are making
preparations for the heaviest move
mont OF grain this fall they have ever
had. according TO the statement OF
On official OF one of these roads
quoted In the Wall Street Journal.
This statement Is confirmed by other
railroad officials. They are con-
vinced that. barring adverse weather
conditions from now on. these big
grain states will harvest unpre-
cedently. large crops and turn over
to the railroads the biggest business
they have ever done for the farm.
This will call into commission the
maximum equipment OF rolling stock
and all the men the roads can mus
ter. II Is extremely fortunate that
such demands find labor conditions
peaceful. II would be a calamity
for the railroads to meet with the
obstacle Of discontented or idle
employees at such time, The har-
vesting OF these prodisious crops will
also require extra large forces Of
men in the fields. So the Macedon-
ian cali for farm hands may Just as
we'll begin to be sounded. for II
sometimes is sounded half In vain
even in moderate seasons.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31
HOW EDITORS SEE THINGS.

Pittsburgh Dispatch: Concerning a re-
port that q golf ball exploded at a links
out IN wisconsin. We find Il Incredible.
Evidently the report got the golf ball
m xsd with the golf player; which latter
class is frequently explosive.
Chicago Record Herald: DR.. Lyman Ab-
eott makes the statement that the col
onel drinks milk 10 excess The doctor
probably took the precsuticn. before
making the announcement TO satisfy him
self that one could drink MIX to excess
without being mollycoddie.
Springfield Republican; There was the
same light vote in the Ohio primaries as
in other states where primaries have been
held. although the sncircllns uproar was
ct the maximum pitch and Intensity. The
excuse for the farmers staying az home
was that planting weather VAS good. but
in Cincinnati only half Of Tafs's vote In
ise was cast IN the republican boxes. The
puzzle Of the season Is 10 place the silent
half
Philadelphia Record: The occasion for
American intervention In Cuba. n n be.
as alleged. . negro uprising should serve
to increase the hesitancy Of action. In
taking over the island ne tan. over the
element Of disturhazcs General Grant
was about right in his opposition 10 the
Annexation Of Cuba He was opposed TO
annexation unless as q preliminary the
island could Be submerged for an hour
or two.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31
A CONFIRMED opTINIsr.

Dis am a life oh want an woe,
Fer lots OBJ us. | spec,
An some folks seems like dey wuz bawn
Ter git il In de neck;
But when dat ole man Trouble comes
An sets his lamps on me.
/ seq ter him right pert. seq l.
Il doan know who you be-
DIS wori' has some contrary ways
CANT jes comprehen';
Deres lots OBJ Happenings. my chile,
Dat eowes de stronges' men,
An old man Troubles on his beat
But when he comes, by jing!
! sticks some writin' on de do
Wot ser. De bell don't ring"
An when de rain comes plunkin' down
An de sky sends 10th a stormer
Way off somewheres de sky am blue
An de weather fair an warmer;
Dere's always some place where its
nice,
So what's de use OBJ poutin'.
Err scowlin' face. Way off some place
Dey's watermeions sproutin'.
De price OBJ po'k may hit de sky.
De beef so aeroplanin',
De mutton rise on wings OBJ trust.
Desc fac's I'm not disclaimin':
But deres a mightier fac dat cheers,
An stead o. courtln' sorrer.
Use thinkin oh all de eggs dat'll be
On ehickin roosts tomorrer.
Omaha. BAYOLL NE TRELE.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31

Lsxify of Courts.
A vigorous demand for the cooperation
Of the courts with the police in punish
Ing crime In New York City has drawn
the fire Of magistrates VIGOROUSLY un-
friendly 70 police methods and started
an Investigation by the Bar association.
The demand is fortified by Police Com
missioner Waldo. who. in a report to
Mayor Gaynor. gives statistics indicating
gross leniency toward lawbreakers exer-
cised by u courts. The commissioner
report shows that there were T5s arrests
for burglary In the first four months
Of the year. with 80 convictions. is ac-
auittais and rs awaiting trial. OF those
convicted seventy-five got off with sus.
pended sentences, In the same period
there were Is arrests for assault and
robbery, with fifty-nine convictions. io2
acquittals and sixty-four awaiting trial
OF those convicted five got suspended
sentences.
The total arrests for the greater CITY
IN the same period were io.oe4. with Lz5
convictions and l.1S OF them freed on
suspended sentences. There were ass
aeauittsls and ass await trial.
Property stolen in the same period was
reported worth sl.ls7,5F and values re-
covered by the police amounted to ss7s..
s7a
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31
Contests

The multiplication Of contests for
the seats OF delegates to Chicago
promises TO be one of the distin-
gushing features of that convention.
and by many is regarded as little
short OF a scandal. Yet some seats
have been contested In nearly every
national convention We have had,
nor Is the contest business confined
10 one political party. Four years
ago 229 seats OF republican dele
gates were disputed. and in the
last democratic national convention
an ugly contest was presented from
Pennsylvania growing out Of the
Guffy episode. IN 1896 Mr.. Bryan
was seated as a delegate from Ne
braska only after a stubborn contest
in the convention that nominated
him for president.
1t seems that the Imperfection OF
our nominating machinery makes
contests possible, and invites them
whenever factions are more or less
evenly divided and competition for
control unusually fierce. Many Of
the contests are merely paper" con-
tests Instituted for reasons Of politi-
cal strategy, while others are real
disputes in which there is a degree
OF merit on both sides. but 80 long
as we have such contests within the
political parties, the conditions from
which they arise must be reviewed,
and the equities established by some
authority.
II is suggested that short cut
through the contest business would
be to exclude all contested delegates
from the organization OF the conven-
tion, and start with uncontested
delegates only. Such plan would
make control OF the convention de-
pend on the success Of the side that
managed to institute more contests
against their opponents than are
brought against themselves. In such
event. 1t is conceivable that rivalry
might lead to institution OF contests
against all the delegates, so that
there would be no uncontested dele
gates left to initiate the convention
proceedings.
The contest situation at Chicago
may be unpleasant. but Il has to be
faced this year as II had TO be faced
four years ago. The settlement Of
the contests cannot be shirked. but
must be made with view to safe
guarding the rights OF all concerned.
and laying permanent foundations
for party success.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31

finds himself disposed TO doubt the
completeness Of IL. We remember
to have heard OF similar reforms
undertaken periodically, by a bar as
ISOLATION nearer home than Chicago.
What q shame the ancient profession
Of law does not rise up In its might
and dignity and smite this parasite
cal enemy that foists and fastens IT,
self upon II and sucks from the pro-
fession so much Of its honor and
reputation. Delays in court proceed
ure are condemned by the Chicago
bar. Good. but they are most hon
orable as compared with some Of the
things done by the shyster and by
some who pretend TO occupy the
higher levels.
Omaha daily bee., 1912-05-31

The Chicago Bar association has
resolved to throw out the shyster
lawyers. II Is q mans Job and de-
ssryes TO succeed. The results. IL
successful. will be attractive to other
bar associations. Vengeance is sworn
especially on the ambulance ehasers,
solicitors Of business from Jail In
mates and other unfortunates..
trouble makers and beginners Of
what are known as pauper cases. at
torreys who try their cases in news
papers in order to prejudice both
judge and Jury.
The laity will watch with keenest
interest the progress Of this house
cleaning II viii be remarkable
reform II achieved. but somehow one