Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1912-04-04
LENA GETS AHEAD
Makes A First Class April Fool Of
Joshua and Gets Him in Bad
with Cousin Minerva
Editor of Journal,

Editor Of Journal,
Dear Sir:-Joshua and have been
having considerable friction since last
weeks Journal came out but SO far he
has got quite bit the worst of it, and
it now looks as if 1 would be able to
manage him alright. am trying Just
now to work scheme on him and I
want you to understand all about it.
This is April Fools day, and he is
busy writing another letter to the
Journal. suppose of course it is full
OF nonsense. I am writing, too; and
he thinks I am writing to his cousin,
Minerva, who is an old maid and lives
in Illinois, but am writing this in
stead. When be gets through, though,
am going to try to exchange the en-
velopes SO his stuff will go to Cousin
Minerva, and then there will be some.
thing doing. In fact, when she gets
through with him, 1 think he will be
pretty well cured. If make it work,
you will get this and won't get his so
you will know what to expect.
The trouble we have had began last
week when the Journal arrived. The
way he went up in his flying machine
when he found my letter right by the
side of his in the paper was certainly
astonishing. When he finished read
ing it he threw the paper down and
turned on me real savage like. But
guess he thought better about starting
row right then without thinking it
over first.
AT any rate he got up and got his
hat and the milk pals just as delibsr-,
ately as he could and stamped out SO
hard that the dishes ratified in the
side-board. And when he slammed
the door it Jared one of my best paint
ed china plates, that paid more than
dollar for, off the rail and broke it all
to pieces.
Then of course nay dandsr began to
rise up. had notion to call him
back, but then thought he would get
into trouble enough if he went to the
barn yard in such q fit of temper as
that, 80 let him go. You see, re.
membered old Snowfall, who had Just
come fre sh and had only been naked
once or twice for we had left the calf
with her. She is rather eccentric, and
l knew right then that Joshua was
headed for trouble.
Sure enough, was right. Every
thing was quiet for few min utes and
then there was big commotion in the
COW barn. And in minute here came
Joshua, looking all drabbled and pretty
badly used up. His hat was gone.
Some of the milk had gone down his
neck and was actually running out of
his trousers legs. There was milk in
his whiskers, milk in his hair. and he
was dripping milk, as you might say,
at every pore.
"Well," 1 said, 'did she forget to
push?"
"Did who forget to pnshe" he snap
ped.
'Why, thought perhaps she forgot
to push the milk back and you had to
pull 500 hard to suit her, and she is so
touchy, and" but 1 didn't get any
farther for he just gave one grunt and
walked away into the kitchen. 1 got
towel and followed him and as l wiped
him off 1 couldn't help thinking what
a good chance it was to "rub it inn
| about his new kind of COWS.
eff it had been soft butter" l said,
''it wouldn't have spread around this
way"
"Soft butter, nothing" he said real
savage like cant you keep still when
q fellow has his ribs broken?"
And then 1 saw that he was really
hurt. Either the pail or Old Snow
balls hoof had struck him under his
arm and had bruised him pretty bad,
though no bones were broken. So 1
had to fix up big mustard plaster for
him while the hired man had another
session with old SNOWFALL.
Now doesn't it all seem like dispen.
sation of Providence, or the hand Of
Fate or something of that kind? Only
last week he was joking about putting
mustard plasters on the cows; and this
week Old Snowfall has fixed him SO he
has to wear one himself. La me! It's
almost enough to make one super
stitious.
Faithfully Yours,