davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1912-08-22

cetaes. All cellars should be dry;
that is, there should be no perceptibie
dampness. When eatables ARE stored
in cellar, there should be no accu-
mutation of mould. At the same time,
cellar should not be dusty dry.
Generally, If cellar Is five feet I'M
dergros.nd, and the wall extends two
or two and half feet above grade.
the cellar will be cool in,sunmer. will
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1912-08-22
ACCOUNTED For.

How is it SO many people seem able
ID get the money to buy automobiles
wtthg"
lSg III you only notice, they are the cas-
Hest things in the world with which to
raise the dust"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1912-08-22

There are lots of funny things to be
seen In this world, and among them is
Il fat woman sitting on little plano
stool.
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1912-08-22
Autocratlc Assertions.

Autocratic Assertions.
/ Are you servant of the people?"
AslIed the constituent.
Yes replied Senator Sorghum.
sAOniy 1t should be observed that
really first-class servant may come
pretty nearly being boss"
Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1912-08-22
w. sr,rmrp NJ =. GYMS

For SUMMER HEADACHES
Hicks CAPUDINE is the best remedy-.o
matter what causes them-whether from the
heat, sitting in draughts, feverish condition,
etc. 10c., 25c. and SIC. per bottle at medicine
stoTes.
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23

And Farmer Davis had said of the judge:
 "The blamed old jackass is a back number in education! He hasn't found out yet that it's pronounced 'hoss' to make it easier for the chill dren. It was getting this good-look- ing gal teacher that gave him the colic."
 And MT. Carstons next message read:
 What A Queer Lot Of Folks!"
 And the answer to it was:
 T Should Say!"
 And then: Let's Resign"
 And the answer:
 Cant. need The Money. Then came a few days of soft weather when no skating could be i'm dulged in, and no more messages written. During this interval MT. Carston sounded the judge by say ing:
 T hear they have a very thorough teacher in the lady in the other dis trict."
 And don't hear any such thing." was the vigorous reply. 'I hear she ain't worth her salt, and that she says horse can be called 'hoss' under cer- tain circumstances"
 "l doubt if she said that"
 Well, l don't care whether she did or not, Davis has called me a blamed old jackass, and this ere quarrel is ts keep right on."
 And then came freezing weather and MT. Carston visited the bay and wrote on it's surface:
 I'm Going To Raise A Rowi"
 And within "A hours he got the an- swer:
 What About?"
 And he replied:
 So As To Get Introduced To You!'
 This was the last message on ice. MT. Carston got out handbills calling a public meeting in the village, and when he had his crowd assembled he rose up and gave them fits. He showed them the envy, spite and fool. ishness of the whole thing, and warned them of the evils and when he stopped speaking Farmer Davis and Judge Flemm1ng were shaking hands over | the chasm.
 few hours later the farmer was saying to two very modest and retir. ing individuals:
 Miss Burton this is Mir. Carston the other teacher. Mighty nice man! Mighty nice gal! Hope to see you skating together"
 And they did skate together the rest of the winter, and if the reporters in formation is reliable they are skating together yet and a very happy couple they are.
 Tt may be hoss' and it may be horse, says Farmer Davis when the question comes up, "but I'm getting around 1t by saying animal in place of either!"
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
SORRY FOR THE PREACHER
Distinguishing Article of Apparel EvI- dentIy Was Unfamiliar to Faithful
 SerVitor.

''If you have taken a degree in di- vinity at Oxford, you are entitled to wear a red hood"
 The speaker was Rev. Ethelbert Reed, the Duluth psychologist. He continued:
 Wearing a red hood myself, I take a natural interest in hood stories. There is one about a man who con- plained to his bishop that So-and-So, though not of Oxford, was wearing a masters hood.
 And l call 1t, blshop,' said the complainant. bitterly, wearing a lie on his back
 "'Oh, don't use so strong a word as that said the bishop. Just call 1t a false hood
 Down south," continued Doctor Reed, "my own hood gave rise to an anecdote. l preached one Sunday in a Georgia church, and after the music a southern lady said to her old coachman:
 Well, Jefferson, how did you like Doctor Reeds sermon?
 On, It Wuz grand, said the old fel- low. All de same. feels kinder sorry fo' de doc. guess he hain't got no women folks to look after him.
 What makes you think that% asked Jefferson's mistress.
 CT noticed. ma'am,' said Jefferson, whenever he turned round in de pulpit dat his coat was split up de back and de red undershirt wus a-showin' through
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
GOOD ADVICE FOR THE YOUNG
Get Married and Be Happy, Says . Venerable Sage of the City Of
 Chicago.

If marriage interferes with your business. give up marriage. He does not actually say so. but MT. Oliver Franklin Fuller, wealthy chemist of Chicago. who recently married, at the age of eighty, Miss Rebecca Secor, thirty years his junior, implies so much in his maxims on matrimony, which he recently expounded on the eve of his wedding.
 Marriage" he said, "Is a great in- stitution, but 1t should never be al- lowed to interfere with a mans busi- ness. It won't in my case. We'll go away for 8 secret honeymoon I've already changed our destination, so that even my two sons and their fam flies won't know where we are going The morning after I return home you will find me in my office at 7:45 a. m, where have always been found for the last 60 years. and where will be until die."
 Here are one or two of the Fuller maxims on marriage:
 Retire from business and from a StdIe Oi uoiHS "Su' anu yOu UeSln to die. Marriage Is the sorcery that re- juvenates a man. Choose your part ner in life with the same care that you would choose a business partner.
 Ponce de Leon was foolish to set out on an endless search for the Fountain of Youth. He could have found 1t in the heart of some comedy Spanish girl. Not to be happily mar ried is to live without joy. blessing, kindness, religion. or peace"
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
A ProphecV.

"The bill met with aD enormous re- ception," said Mayor Baehr of Cleve- land, discussing a measure that had failed. Its reception was, in fact. as ominous as that accorded to the Christmas melodrama in the two-night stand.
 "A Amelodrama-'Murdered at Christ mastide'-was to be given for two nights in a small town. The first night there was fair audience; but when, iii act three the senior villain said to the junior; Hist! are we alone% a voice from the gallery growled:
 "'No, Hamfat, not tonight; but you can bet you'll be tomorrow night. |"
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
But I don't want you to-"

QOu you
 "Why?"
 Because 1 want to beat him my. self. l want to beat him at checkers and then mary him."
 "Shoo! l never heard the like. ] thought women married for love-"
 Its sometimes just as well to love after marriage. When 1 was a girl at home played a pretty good game of che ckers, didn't IT"
 "Um-m-m-m. Yes, remember"
 But not good enough?"
 Not good enough to beat county champion"
 Now listen. You are not to let on here in Hillsdale that you ever played game. You are to devote six hours a day to instructing me. You have got to teach me all the tricks in the business"
 And then what?"
 ''I'll play against this man and beat him and marry himi"
 ''I don't see how beating a man at checkers Is going"
 You never mind that. Teach me to beat him and III take care of the rest"
 Work WAS begun the next day, and 1t was thirty days and one more for good measure when the father said:
 That's enough, Mary. can't teach you another darned trick. Say, you'll down him, but maybe he won't propose after all"
 Then mawbe you've got 8 mush- room for daughter!"
 The game of checkers that was brought about between the widow and widower will be remembered in Hills dale until long after the children of that day are married oil. It was brought about through badinage on the part of the widOw-a little badi- mage and little boasting. The nov city of playing checkers with a wo' man rather appealed to MT. Narmore The struggle came oil in the town hall, where the hundreds of specta' tors could see. On that day, an hour before the game began, the widow Dakin, the widow Stevens and the widow Everett tainted away and had to have the doctor. They realized that they were out of the running.
 There were predictions that the struggle, which was to be for the best three games out of five. would last a week. A whole day was the most conservative prediction, and many spectators brought noon lunch con. But things went like a cyclone after a rabbit. In two hours 1t was begun and ended. The widow Harper wop three straight games, and the wldower Narmore never had chance There were cheers and shouts and yells. and the victor was draped 1T Old Glory.
 Daughter. what was Narmore say ing to you after the gamer" asked the father after the two had reached home.
 Why. he was asking me to be hi: wife"
 By thundeF!"
 But doesn't man want a wife that he can brag of and that everybody else will brag Of? Thanks, daddy You can go back home now if yol are lonesome for mother!"
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
Preaching and Practice.

The college instructor should take pains to practice what he breaches.
 Ons member of class in English composition brought his theme to the professor. after recitation hour in or. der that the professor might read a marginal correction which he had writ ten, and which the pupil had been en- tirely unable to make out.
 Why" explained the professor, that says Write more plainly "- Youth's Compsniop-
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
A Nice Point.

Every student of history knows that our Christmas customs are de- velopment of Roman Saturnslia."
 "Oh, surely not all!"
 'T think so."
 "No, no! There's no reason to SUD- pose, for instance, that the Romans were all the time being hunched to do their Saturnalian shopping early" Pluck.
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
Always Backward.

A couple of women, well seated on crowded street car, were loudly en- gagged in a conversation regarding woman suffrage, to the delight of their fellow passengers. The two were somewhat startled when the car pass ed the corner at which they wished to alight They hustled through the standing crowd. continuing their con. versation meanwhile. Well" re- marked a man to the conductor, there's nothing backward about women nowadays" Watch 'em get off," said the official They got of bsckwsrdI
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
unromantle courtinn.

Dr. Abernethy, the famous surgeon, wrote to the lady on whom he had a matrimonial eye: Dear Madam: I am much too busy man to have time for love-making; but should like to marry you, and shall be glad to learn your decision before the end of the week." If Mary had been a sensible woman she would have answered something like this: Dear Sir:I would not for worlds interfere with your business Pray stick to It."
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
The Di1ndu1nneriies

'Whachu doin'?" Queried the small boy as he peered cautiously out of the back gate into the alley where the apartment house janitor was superin- tending the cremation of rubbish heap. The small boys nostrils twitched appreciatively as he sniffed the bonfire.
 Mike, the janitor, looked all around and then cautiously said: "Hist!" and crooked 8 finger.
 What Is it?" gasped the small boy as he tiptoed hurriedly out and joined Mike on the windward side of the blaze.
 'It's a cillybration, of mine," the ianitor explained. Every vance in 8 while I go through the rites"
 What rites?" in an awed whisper.
 Mike poked in recalcitrant wad of excelsior and, after swatting the blaze around the edges, put one fist on his hip. "You didn't know" he remarked, that I was chief of the Dimdum- merfes before I came to this country, did you? Well, was!"
 The small boy dragged up box that had escaped the blaze and sat down on it very close to Mike. "Tell me-" he begged.
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23

for charity, or do you adver- tise for direct results1
 Did you ever stop to think how your advertising can bs made a source of profit to you, and how its value can bo measured in dollars and cents. If you have not, you are throwing money away.
 Advertising is a modern business necessity, but must be conducted on business principles. If you are not satisfied with your advertising you should set aside a certain amount of money to be spent
Holbrook argus., 1912-04-23
Enlarging Your Business

annually, and then carefully note the effect it has in in. creasing your volume of busi- ness; whether a 10, 20 or 30 per cent increase. If you watch this gain from year to you will become intensely in- terested ir your advertising, and how you can make it en. large your business.
 If you try this method we believe you will not want to let a single issue of this paper go to press without something from your store.
 We will be pleased to have you call on us, and we will take pleasure in explaining our annual con tract for so many inches, and how it can be used in whatever amount that seems necessary to you.
 If you can sell goods over the counter we can also shcw you why this paper will best serve your interests when you want to reach the people ef this community.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28

Umpires: Street, Cosby.
Scorekeeper; Lanctot.
Score; Island Pond 5, Frontiers 25. At
tendance, 206.
The above taken from The Stanstead
journal of June Goth IS both amusing
and instructive, but decidedly misleading
both in total score and line up of Island
Pond players The official score was
Derby Line 20, Island Pond 5. Lougee
was not at Derby Line, Saucier playing
3rd, and st. Pierre playing If instead
of Riggie.
The instructive feature in the above
is that Derby Line really has local
team. This fact surprises us as during
the writer's sixteen years acquaintance
with base ball he never saw the Frontiers
OF Derby Line play a strictly home team.
The average lineup was three home and
six semi.pro players from the outside
| toWuS, buIS u'cS IlOO IHCluue Gue seasons
that Tufts College team played for them
as local aggregation. However, be
that as it may, local Frontier team
would be a great attraction both here
and in other towns, as it would be
something absolutely new, aud until this
time unheard Of Island Pond surely
would like to book an attraction of this
kind, but why expect the Impossible?
We offer no excuse for the showing of
the local boys, they were outclassed by
a star combination, on strange dia-
mond, and before crowd that were out
to see the home team win, regardless Of
cost, which they did, in decisive man
ner, and if the Frontier supporters are
satisfied we certainly should be, as they
paid for their pleasure (?) after time.
The general feeling is that our boys did
well, all things considered, and we are
satisfied, if Derby Line is not they have
recourse to another game later in the
season.
L. c. WILCOX, Manager.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
What Was Happening Here
80 Years Ago

The crops throughout our country are
reported to be in most healthy condi-
ion, and the prospects for an abundante
harvest are very cheering.
Among the acts of especial interest to
Masons in this vicinity at the 65th ann
uat convocation of the Grand Chapter
was that of alternating the convocation
Barton Chapter so that meetings will be
held part of the year in Island Pond
AS there are few telephones in use
in Island Pond, the following from
Boston physician may not be amiss.
lie recommends that "persons who fire.
quently use the telephone apply the in
strument alternately to the right and
left ear in order to prevent injury"
This advice was given in consequence of
having to treat several patients whose
constant use of one ear at the telephone
had materially dulled the hearing.
A violent wind storm struck this Vi
cinity last Monday afternoon dong con-
siderable damage In its wake. Trees
were uprooted, gardens destroyed, fences
blown down, windows broken, and Fitz-
gerald's boom parted, causing the logs to
scatter all over the pond, therebp entail
ing quite loss to Mr.; Fitzgerald. AT
East Brighton a cow was killed by a
tree that blew down falling upon her.
The gale lasted about five minutes.
Mrs. Joe. Palmer of Mou mt Tom, Mass.
and Miss &. A. Cheney, the noted soloist,
are visiting in town, and are heartily
greeted by their many friends.
Special communication of Island
Pond No. A, F. & A. NJ, Mondny, July
I,-3rd degree.
Mrs. Guy Bruce and Mrs. Elmer
Walter spent the week end here.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28

343,O4972
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
DERBY LINE HAS A
REAL BALL TEAM

The Island Pond team came over Sat
urday Ia pay off a liability cont acted
at the game on their own grounds Sat
urday the 9th Of June, aud many little
things in life and baseball, they more
than doubled their obligation. There
was fine attendance at the Athletic
Field, for we expected a snappy, close
game, aud the first three innings we're
good ball, but perhaps it was too good
to last, so it proved, the fourth COM
menced with about an even load, then
came an avalanche, the locals captured
seven scores, the balance was what the
boys use for carrying fire on Indepen-
dence Day, aud the history is not worthy
of record-Laird pitched good ball, and
the fielders did very good work, but it
was all very much too easy. Our local
fellows would defeat the |. p. team.
"Lackey" was at Short and is playing
better ball than ever before. 1t is very
easy to see that we have some good bal
coming. The line up;
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
Paras0Is for Ladies'
BATHING SUITS
for all the people
L. F. JONES Dry Goods

Mrs. Ray Skinner and daughter of
Skinner, Me-, are visiting Mrs. A. Bart.
lett.
Mrs. Is. j. McKenney is visiting
friends in Montreal.
Mrs. |. E. Curtis has been quite sick
with the measles.
Mrs. Burt Shedd who has been very i'll
is gaining slowly.
Mrs. L. E. Boyce of Ludlow is visit.
ing at F. E. Boyces.
Fl: E. Fitzgerald of Wethurn, Mass,
is spending the week with Il. C. Wilcox
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
No APIS.

REPORT OF THE CONDITION OF
The Island Pond National Bank, at Island Pond
in the State of Vermont at the close of business
June ID, 1912.
RESOURCES
Loans and Discounts $3o7,2S2 So
OverdraftS, secured and unsecured 20
U. S. Bonds to secure circulation $1,000 90
Bonds securities, etc 10000 90
Due from National Banks On OF
reserve agents. LAO %
Due from approved reserve agents 3o,4SI 90
Checks and other Cash Items IS Fl
Notes of other National Banks 90 90
Fractional paper currency, nicke1s & cents II 90
Lawful Money Reserve in Bank, viz:
Specie SII,o53 50
Legal-tender notes $3.50 90 1888 so
Redemption fund with U. s. Treasurer
Is per cent of circulation 1850 90
TOTAL 343,o49 II
LIABILITIES
Capital stock paid in SIS, 600 90
Surdlus fund as 600 90
Undivided Profits, less Expenses and
Taxes Paid 2oS62 81
National Bank Notes outstanding $1,000 90
Individual deposits subject to check 342,S7I 70
Demand certificates of deposits o,3II 81
Certified checks 22o o5
Cashiers checks outstanding 27S3 IS
Bills payable, including certificates of
deposit for money borrowed 10000 90
ToTAr 2A2 o1o u
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
Become Our Representative

A company having the highest repu-
tation for reliability and liberality for
over twenty years, can put on number
of men in unoccupied territory, training
them in salesmanship, paying them a
liberal commission on acceptance of
orders. If written to at once can place
inexperienced men and those having
had experience in nursery stock or other
lines. Unusual inducements to square
reliable men.
Allen Nursery Co,
Rochester, N. Y.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28

weeks visit with her mother in North |
Stratfor1, n. II.
Mrs. Ed. Ellis and daughter Jennie,
returned last Tuesday, after having spent
two weeks with relatives in Colebrooke,
n. II.
Mrs. Carl Foss and daughter Mary,
spent last week with her parents, MIR
and Mrs. James Dunn at Groveton, N. II
Mr.. and Mrs. Burt Nichols of East
Haven have been in town Sc veral days
with friends. Mr. Nichols has been
general manager of the veneer mill at
East Haven for the p asst five years but
has severed his connection with that
concern and goes to Montgomery to occ.
upy similar position.
Mrs Frank Danforth and two child
rem have been spending the past two
weeks at her fathers cottage at Averill
Lake
Mis-. Henry Norton and Mrs. Harry
Amey were in Newport Tuesday.
Mrs. Marion Burns of Newport is
visiting her sister Mrs. p. Dusault.
Miss Martha Davis, teacher at New.
at Barre, arrived home last Saturday to
spend their summer vacation. Miss
Strathern was accom- ained by her neice,
Rena Cole, of Groveton.
T. II. Mason has resumed his duties
at Chief Dispatcher at the local offices
after an absence of a month,
Milton Stern spent Sunday with his
parents, Mr. and Mrs Daniel Stern.
Cards have been received here an
nounciug the marriage of Miss Edna E.
Hunt to Vile j. Albert at Lyndonville
lost Monday Both parties are well
known here. After July LIST they will
reside at East Haven.
Mr. and Mrs. f. A. Cabana and
, family, of Buffalo, N Y, arrived this
week and are now occupying their cot
tage on the lake shore. Mrs. Cabana
spent few days with her parents, Mr..
and Mrs r. II. Emerson, at Goriiam,
N. H., last week.
A fishing party composed of Prof.
Burt, M. I, Sadleir and Thomas Hen
derson took trip to the North Branch
Monday and returned with fine catch.
Aaron II. Wagner, former immi-
grafton officer at this port, was in town
over Sunday.
Miss Marion Dale is home after com.
! plotting her studies at Framinghom
= Mass, where she graduated last week
Mary Stroche who has been studying in
Boston is also home for the summer.
Miss Myrtle Ames is spending few
days with her sister, Mrs. Marsh. al
Norton.
| Misses Melissa and Ella Moore ar,
visiting at the home of their father
Samuel Moore.
II Miss Blanche Rexford, of Springfield
Mass, is expected tomorrow to spent
her annual vacation here
| Mrs. Eva Evans and daughter, Letta
Randolph Center are visiting relative
here.
T. G. Carr was in Glover Wednesda,
| visiting relatives. His mother returned
home with him.
Mr.. and Mrs. George st. Pierre ar
receiving congratulations upon the brit
of handsome baby girl which arrived
I Wednesday noon.
Edward Moore, instructor at Vernon
( Academy, Saxtons River, VT, is spend
ing the summer vacation with hi
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. Samuel Moore.
y A good number of the townspeopl
visited Portland and the Beaches Sunday
Mr.. and Mrs. II. b johnson of Whit
/ River Jet. are visiting friends and rela
tives in town.
Mr.. Fred Hamlet of West Charlestc
was business visitor in town Wednes
N day.
y Fred Stevens and Harry Coe have in
q stalled new milking machines.
q Miss Irene Lougee is spending tw
q weeks in Coaticook visiting friends.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1912-06-28
Something Desirable

The many desirable things about bank account
only appreciated after you have Some have
notion that it is necessary to deposit large
start bank account but the opposite is true 1t only
takes dollar to open savings account with lis,
and help you make it grow by paying interest twice
each year this dollar and the many other dollars
that will surely follow you have formed the
banking habit.
Contrary to that old fogey notion that the family
purse must be guarded by the of the house,
opening many accounts with women, and find they
fully appreciatethe advantages in paying bills with
checks, and are as business like the men.
Why do you go to your merchant any one to
pay your bills !? Be independent have check book
of your own Send your check AS long as you
have money in the Bank your check is good
Rockfeller's.
For Our Mutual Prosperity
Island Pond National Bank