Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1912-07-04
that half the young fellows in town

envy Tic
But even mayors wife cannot
usurp the fitting allegiance of the pop
ulace when right behind her comes the
local newspaper Office on wheels, with
the most awful devil" feeding hand
bills into pony jobber!
And next appears "The First Cont
mental Congress-" in session, and more
ragamuffins and more floats, more mu-
sic and more excitement ending with
a take.off on a calliope and clown
driving town donkey, with two hun
dred small boys shouting and hooting
as tail to the kite!
Isn't 1t great!
You know 1t. for you can see hun
dred things in this parade that l
haven't the space to tell you about but
that you and know are there!
The Exercises In the Park.
And now the people are gathering
in the park to hear the Fourth of July
exercises. They sit about the band
stand on pianks loaned by the local
lumberman, unmindful Of the occa.
sional patch of pitch that oozes from
the timbers. In the background the
small boys are trying to keep from
81 shooting niger chasers and be patri-
otic along more civilized lines. The
raucous cries Of the candy venders are
heard from the outposts, and the vi
brant toottoot of the peanut roaster
shrills It's piquant note.
The pastor Of a local church offers
p prayer Attorney Albert Comstock
arises stiffy and reads the Declara-
tion of independence. and the chorus
Of fifty school girls in white dresses
and blue ribbons, sing "The Star Span
gled Banner, long may 1t wave!
Miss Isolda Atherton. who has been
educated in a musical conservatory
abroad. arises dantily and sings
"America"-and,a as a rule, the Isoldas
of the country who have been given
advantages, sing we'll. The country
girl Is the real girl Of America, after
all.
And then the mayor, confident and
beaming, arises in the background Of
the stage and walking gracefully to
the fore, tells the waiting crowd 1--WE
have with us today" the senator from
the district who will speak on the live
topics Of the time.
And when he has finished, the band
plays, the noise breaks forth anew and
everybody hurries over to see the
country boys catch creased pig and
climb a creased pole-not with or aft
er the pig, but as separate act OF
jollity.
The Creased Pig.
Did you ever try to catch a creased
pig? Catching the elusive dollar isn't
in it with catching a creased pig! Oh,
nothing like! For when you have
caught dollar. you can sit down on it
or hold 1t in your teeth-but with
caught pig, believe me, it's entirely diff
ferent If you ever had tried to hold
a creased pig by sitting on him, you
would understand! Why. a girl who
isn't quite sure she loves you about
the time new dude comes to town,
Is not as hard to hold as creased
pig!
Tho only thing know Of harder to
detain than a creased pig is an auto
mobile with the throttle open and the
brake broke! Yes, with the brake
broke!
Well, the boys 60 after that pig!
And-but what's the use? You've seen
1t and laughed your false teeth loose
over 1t. | know woman who broke
three steels In her corset and had to
be famed back to life, Just laughing
over a creased pig episode.
The Baseball Game.
There is no sport like It! am speak
ing now of the baseball game as it Is
played in the country with rival town
clubs. have sat in the press box Of
the city ball parks and seen the great
est ever" play the game-but, pshaw!
I'd rather go down to Berryvale any