The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1912-07-20
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WOman-nater! lauSn00 Ira ItS
the old story. I'm going to follow
Mallorys example-marriage."
II hope you succeed" said Mallory.
wherever did you pick up the
bride?" said Wedgewood. mellowing
with the long glass in his hand.
Brides are easy" said Mallory.
with surprising cynicism. where do
you get the parson?"
Hang the parson." Wedgewood re-
psated. "Who's tho gei,"
I'll bet I know who she Ia" Ash
ton interposed; ITS that nectarine OF
| . damsel who got on at Green River"
mot the same!" LAthrop roared.
II found my bride blooming here all
the while. Girl used to spark back
in Brattleboro, VT. I've been vowing
for years that I'd live and die an OLD
maid. I've kept my head out OF th~
moose all this time-till I struck this
train and met up with Anne. We got
TO talking over old times-waking I'D
ofd sentiments. She got on my nerves.
got ON hers. Finally I said, 'Aw.
hell. lets get married. Save price OF
one stateroom to China anyway She
says, Damned II dont!-or words
to that effect"
Mallory broke In with feveriah In.
terest: But you said you were going
70 get married on this train"
Nothing easier. Here's howl" and
he raised his glass. but Mallory hauled
down to demand: "How? that's
what want to know. How are you
going to get married on this parson.
sess express. Have you got q little
minister In your suitcase?"
Ira beamed with added pride as he
explained:
Well you sec, when / used to
court Anne had Q rival-Charlie Sell
by his name vas. thought he cut
mo out but be became Q clergyman
IN Utah-Oh. Charlie! telegraphed
MIN that ] was passing through or.
den. and would be come down to the
train and marry No to q charming
lady. He always wanted to marry
Anna ! thought Il would be q burned
good Joke TO let him marry her-to
ms."
"Ddid be acoaptr' Mallory ssked.
excitedly. IN he ooming?"
He is-he dh-here's hin tahe.
gram said ira HE brings the II
canss and the ring" He passed II
over. and a. Mallory read 1t q hook
OF hope spread across hts faoa. But
Ira was saying: "We're going to have
the wedding obseQuies right hero In
this car. You're all invited. Will you
GOMEZ! ,.ssSss;o ~ .-Sss;osa~s-.As.ssHss--~- =
There was general yell of accept.
ance and Ashton began to sing.
There Was Waiting at the Church"
Then be led q sort Of Indian war.
dance rCund the next victim OF the
matrimonial stake. At the end OF the
huilaballoo all the men charged their
glasses. and drained them with an up.
roar1ous "How!"
Poor Dr. Temple had taken luxurt-
o,is delight In the success Of his dis.
guise and In the prospect Of watch.
Ing some other clergyman working
while he rested. He Joined the dance
as Gaily. II not az gracefully, as any
of the rest and in a final triumph OF
recklessness. he tossed on a bumper
OF straight whisky.
Instantly his Howl" changed to
wow" and then his throat clamped
fast with terrific spasm that flung
the tears from his eyes. He bent and
writhed In silent paroxysm till he
was pounded and shaken back to life
and water poured down his throat 10
reopen a passage.
The others thought he had merely
choked and made no comment other
than sympathy. They could not have
dreamed that the old physician" was
as ignorant OF the taste as of the
vigor of pure spirits.
After riot OF handshakin9 and
good wishes. Ira was permitted TO es
cape with his life. Mallory followed
MN 70 the vestibule, when he caught
him by the sleeve with an anxious:
Excuse me-"
Well. my boy"
Your minister-after you get
through with hin-may I use him 20
May you-what? Why DO you
want q minister"
TO get married"
Again! Good Lord, are you q Nor
mon?~
Me Mormon!"
Then what do you want with an
extra wife: It's against the law
even In Utah"
You don't understand"
My boy. one OF us Is disgracefully
drunk"
Well. I'm not" said Mallory, and
then after fierce inner debate. he
decided to take Latnrop into his con.
ndence. The words came hard after
so long "a dupliCity. but nj last thov