davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
A FEAST IN PROSPECT

fIOIn I1dIpS' Ntth
 "We who are about to dine salute you" is the neat way in which the World an- nounces that it has lost a bet to Marse Henry Watterson. This was the wager proposed and accepted in December, 1909:
 A dinner for four-and-twenty that the first Monday of December, 1911, William Howard Taft and Theodore Roosevelt decided by the chief justice, the Vice President, and the speaker of the House pc between us.
 The appointed day having come and gone, the World confesses judgment and calls upon the winner to name time, place, food, and guests. Whereupon Marse Henry bites his pen and medita- lively murmurs:
 Shall WI have another democratic reaoe dinner with every presidential as- pirant at table or an all around love feast, having no party complexion. with Uncle Joe Cannon in the seat of honor r?''
 As an expectant guest, we appeal for recognition of the eternal fitness of things The democratic presidential aspirants have had no part in this affair. They ere talking too much, anyway. Nor can we perceive any sufficient reason for ex- alting Uncle Joe. Clearly the guests of honor should be the two distinguished statesmen whose unhappy differences have made the dinner possible and inev- ilable. Let Colonel Watterson escor, President Williasa Howard Taft to g high chair at one end of the table and let Brother Ralph Pulitzer, with becom- ing difference, conduct the Hon. Theodore Roosevelt to an electric chair at the other end. Then fetch on the ducks and drakes and let joy be unconfined.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
From the New York Sun.

From the New York Sun.
 hAS the time come to say good-by to our friend the waiter? Has the \ \ moment arrived to bestow on the servant of our noon lunches a final largess, accept in return that condescend- ing acknowledgement which comes where generosity keeps pace with expectation rather than deserving. and turn to the newer, better times, wherein machine and not man provides?
 If the veracious announcement of a London journal, fortified with photo graphs, is to be accepted, this time of farewell has come. Only a few more days remain in which it will be permitted us to enter our familiar restaurant, ac- cept the daily tribute to vanity which the head walters look of recognition brings and march to the accustomed seat guard ed against the common herd, the tipless rabble, by that faithful, leaden footed, futile waiter, whom a cloak of inyisi- bility encompasses when time is short, but whose ubiquity imposes when the end has come that is the real end, the tip.
 Hereafter, so the London notice fore casts, our entrance will be unattended. h. stead of the salvo of salutes from de- scending grades of walters we shall march straight to our table, grasp the lever of a clock like machine, not unfamiliar al- ready in a few hotels in this country, but newly brought to full perfection, and turning the hands to the circumference where appear the appropriate labels of meat and drink, summon the desired deli cacy.
 Then. presently, instantaneously per-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
The William Gussens

There is every indication from the sale of tickets that the Jefferson theatre will be crowded next Tuesday night on the occasion of the concert complimentary to MT and Mrs. William Gussen, principals of the Birmingham Conservatory of Music.
 MT. and Mrs. Gussen are musicians of the first class. and would hold their own in any large northern city, said a mem Der of the musical set. Birmingham is fortunate in having such thoroughly equipped teachers as the Gussens Not only have they been among the best factors of this city's educational life, but they have been ever ready to assist worthy causes. They met with serious loss in the recent Second avenue fire. The benefit concert to be given next week will afford-th public the first opportunity to show it's appreciation in a gracious way of these two musical artists. The Jefferson theatre should be filed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
Escorts of Honor in Washington

The first royal visitor in several years, the son of Victoria, went the New York pace in Washington, ar irving at 4:15 in the afternoon and leaving at midnight for New York. The duke chatted with the President at the White. House, received a re- turn visit at the British embassy, visi- ted the Press club, where he made a brief speech, and then was dined by Ambassador Bryce at the embassy where he staid until train time, just before midnight. This brief glimpse of royalty is all that Washington will secure from the son of the good queen.
 The visit was announced as of a social nature only. He who signs himself Arthur, governor general of Canada" had no political message to bring or to hear. He paid his respects to the President, and why a man en- gagged on such an errand should be escorted to and from the embassy and White House by four troops of cav airy does not appear. An escort of honor for casual visitor would seem to be new precedent even in the case of royal dukes. The drawing of the escort line is now an open ques- ton. As things stand the President of Hayti stopping over in Washing
 ton for a day would be entitled to at
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

least one troop of cavalry as an es-
 eort of honor, but the programme of Secretary Philander Knox and the ad-
 remains to be defined after royal guests are passed. Royal dukes are entitled to four troops of cavalry as an escort of honor, and there this feature of the administra- tion stands to be filled out in the future.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
WOMEN IN THE NEWS

From the Pittsburg Sun.
 The newspapers the other day carried stories of three women whose names VIII live long. Their acts were of such char acter as to become types or standards in certain lines of conduct, and that means that those who gave them cannot be for gotten.
 First, in the amount of space required to tell her story, was the woman who gave an animal dinner" in San Francisco that was quite the sensation of the season in high society circles. It was as successful as 1t was gorgeous and unique. The dinner table represented a scene in the jungle. There were -atuffed figures of ele- plants, lions, tigers, giraffes and lot of living figures, among the latter being ducks, parrots. frogs, lizards. canary birds and crabs. Frogs hopped from the grass covered table into the laps of the guests and caused shrieks of laughter and ex- citemenr generally. Then, too. there was great fun when bits of bread soaked in champagne were given to the parrots. The latter were more than amusing in their antics when the champagne took effect. Considered from the standpoint of unique- NO~- congratulated upon designing and giving a dinner that will live long in the memory of those who attended it or heard about It, The readers attertion was next called to a notice of the death of a heroine at Boone, la. About 30 year sago. when she was station agent at Moingona, there was a great flood in Honey creek, near her or fee. It finally washed away the railroad bridge over the creek, and train was coming. The only way in which the train could be kept from. plunging into the creek. of course, was to flag it in time, but doing that was not easy under the cir cunistances. It was necessary for the person who die 1t to cross another rall- road bridge at night and during storm. As there was danger of making a misstep and dropping between the ties Into the river, this task was perilous one, but the woman Accomplished 1t by crawling across the bridge on her hands and knees, and arriving on the other side just In tune to save the train It was a bit of hero ism tha. was appreciated the country over, and the Iowa legislature rewarded her with a medal and money. Today 50 years 1uter-ner SloTy iS stiii AhSSit --- the minds of thousands and her name will live for many years more.
 The third was just little notice or some of the activities of an organization whose mission is to sew for the poor. It was olgh, however, to remind one that the name of the woman, after whose career it was patterned, has lived for cen- turies. She,was so beloved in her time by the people of Joppa that they induced one of the apostles to bring her back to life after she had died. Her life had been full of good works' When the apostle arrived he was shown the coats she had made for the needy ones. No one was willing to give her up.
 Although the stories of these three women are vastly different, each is inter- estlng, and may become more so through comparison and reflection.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
INDUCEMENTS TO MENDICANcy

Charles Francis Adams, World work for
 February.
 Such cases of pension fraudras the fol- lowing, too numerous to specify, are on record and have in course of recent de- bate, been brought to the notice of Con gross. A responsible man, himself a vet eran of the war. wrote from a, town fin Ohio that he "could name at least 20 men in the same company to which he be- longed who are receiving under special pension acts S2i a month, and who never stood in line of battle.' Still another ease was specified on the floor of the last House of a man "who enlisted in 1864, got a big bounty; stayed in the hospital until discharged; never fired a gun or did a days duty at the front; came home; was examined, was pensioned at SIP per month. for the last stages of consumption. and is living yet' A system under which such abuses exist, and are practically connived at, is one not improperly characterized as a system which offers every possible ihdueement to mendicancy and conceals every possible inducement to fraud.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
THE OLD TIME BARBER

From the London Chronicle.
 old time barbers. however, had to dis- p,ay more variety than their successors. A work published in 1892 describes bar ber's greeting to a customer: Sir. wAU you have your hair cut after the Italian manner, short and round, and then frounst with the curling irons to make it look like half moon In mist' or like a Spanlard. long at the ears ana c,trled like the two ends of an old perl wig. or will you be Frenchified With lovelock down to your shoulders? The English cut is base. and gentlemen scorn if. novelty is dainty. Speak the word, sir. my scissors are ready to execute your worships will"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
CARUsO DOES "TURKEY TROT,

From the New York Sun.
 Little did Giacomo Puccini know what was coming to him when he conceived the brilliant idea of putting waltz into the first act of '"The Girl of the Golden Vest" He may have known MT. Caruso would SUI ely inpersonate Johnson, but did he realize that the famous tenor was far more iconoclastic than himself in matters of time and fashion? If he had been present at the performance of the opera las. evening he would have seen the great singer introduce a startling in novation apong the fashions of the Forty niners
 At the end of a certain episode in the first act Johnson and Minnie waltz from the stage into the dance hall while the was a graceful waltzer. He always lum- bered. But last night the audience sat up and stared. What was this? The bumped shoulders, the bowed back, the siding sway, the magic embrace-it was, it was-yes-the turkey trot!''
 From California it came. To California it was returned. Caruso and Destinn were the trotters. For the first time on any stage in genuine bona fide grand opera the turkey trot.'' Will it>be permanent? Has it come to stay? And if so, can it not be forever preserved to countless future generations by moving picture films? And, oh horror! will the police or the alder men try to stop it?
 Anyhow. last nights audience saw it. There was no grizzly bear'' or bunny hug" about it. It was just the old orig inal trot, and when Emmy Destinn dis covered what Caruso was up to she joined in with both feet and made the thing a perfect success. These two great artists have added new laurels to their crowns They now do the biggest song and dance act before this public. If the trot does not give new life to The Girl" good many people will miss their guess.
 Sheriff Rance Amato did not seem 10 like the new deal. It was bad enough to see a whisky and water drinker come into camp and get shine on the ohis girl right off the bat, but to see him in less tran 10 minutes after the meeting lead her into the guileful mazes of the trot-well, that was too much altogether. After that Rance slid away into the pack ground like scooting jackrabbit There were some other singers in the cast. too Dinh Gilly, with the midway name and
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
Pig Iron situation

Really the main feature in the iron trade just now is the poor service be- ing given by the railroads say Matthew, Addy & Co.,, in their Cincin- natl market report. "Freights have been most fearfully tied up. This con- dition prevails everywhere. It takes about three times as long to get iron and coke through as Is usually the case. Fortunately the extreme win- ter weather has broken. Had 1t con tinued there is no telling what would have happened. In every direction the weather has caused trouble. In the south, because of the stoppage of work in the open cut brown~ ore mines, there is great shortage of ore.
 "There is no doubt in our minds that the consumption of iron is growing. One of our statesmen in writing us says: All the plants l have visited to- day seem busy and report good out look for business-in fact some are quite enthusiastic.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
GRAMMAR.

GRAMMAR. mere was young lady from Kent, whose grammar was terribly bent: She said to her flame, l m glad you have came. But III miss you so much when you've went. -Pittsburg Post. We knew her quite well, and blunder Of hers often rends us asunder; She said-this is true T seen what to do. And l done it"-now aint she the wonder ?
 Altoona Times. She spends lots of time with a book. Historical. trashy, or cook. And she says: T enjoy Readin' books, my dear boy, Cause they learn me so mueh.' Get the
 -Johnstown Democrat. He coaxed her one morning to fly. They fell from halfway to the sky: When asked to explain, She replied with much pain: "lt almost killed he and l."
 Chicago Record Herald And later they went for a walk oh my! but the neighbors did talk. When she said, Me and him Must be right In the swim," His face 1t got whiter- than chalk.
 AN ENGLISH WIT. One of the best of the Labouchere stories concerns Sir Henry Irving. The
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
Pipe Lines as Common Carriers

The Tidewater pipe line has been brought before Commissioner Lane of the United States Interstate com merce commission, who desires to know why they should not be recog- nized as common carriers to be duly regulated and supervised by the in- terstate commerce commission. An official of the Standard Oil testified that he could not see how pipe line could be operated as common car rier when different shipments and grades of oil are mixed in pipe line, and it was impossible to deliver the exact goods to a consignee. One pipe line tried to separate shipments by running, 300 barrels of water after each shipment, but it was found that oil and water would mix, and the ex- pertinent was not successful.
 The question involved has never been determined. and Commissioner Lane's opinion on it will be perhaps the first official or judicial test of the involved and subtle question. The pipe lines are warm competitors of the railroads, and if they cannot be classed as common carriers they will he a law unto themselves and the rail- roads will have rivals that no com- mission controls.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
Excellent Opportunities offered

Few people realize the opportuni- ties that are offered to the boys and girls of the Central High school of preparing themselves to enter really re- munerative and responsible positions in the business world immediately aft CT graduation" said an educator. This can be accomplished either by taking the commercial course, which in- cludes bookkeeping, stenography and typewriting, or by taking one or more of these branches in connection with the academic or college preparatory course.
 These studies are open to all pupils at the beginning of their third year, and the English training being the same in this as in the college prepara- tory course, makes the stenographers especially well equipped in spelling and punctuation, feature greatly ap- preclated by business men everywhere. The demand for High school steno- graphers Is always greater than the supply. Nothing is more helpful to young people either in entering busi- ness life, or In assisting them through college, than a knowledge/ of stem ography and typewriting, and every man ought to have some knowledge of bookkeeping The ability to do neat and accurate typewriting is valuable to every one, whether in business or private life.
 Many have been deterred from talk ing the commercial course because those studies have not heretofore been accepted for college entrance, but the University of Chicago now accepts them on the same basis as other 'topics,' and doubtless other univer- sities will soon make a similar ruling"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Elegant Hotels

"one hotel of the $1,O00,0O0 class would 1t may be that two or three, or even four, would pay well," said a travelled man. "Ali of the sites discussed now are at tractive. A hotel on the Jordan corner will certainly be built, and hotel on the Roden property at the corner of Fifth avenue and Eighteenth street will also be reality. The much discussed site at the northwest corner or Second avenue and Twenty-first street is singularly at tractive from an investment point or view, and 1t is probable that hotel Will be built there. Another fine site is Dan- gaixs corner, Fourth avenue and Nlhe- teenth street. Still another fine site that has been mentioned is at the corner or Twenty-frst and Park avenue-Major Tut wiler's home property. It is an excep- tionally attractive site on account of it's elevation and it's outlook upon Capitol park.
 "The Roden hotel will change that part of the city in a most appreclable de- gree. The government has already paid for the postoffice site at the corner or Fifth avenue and Nineteenth. The gov ernment will spend not less than Sl,OOoooe on its edifce, and the Roden hotel and the government building to be near each other will certainly make values hum Tn a section that had ceased to be fashion able. Fifth avenue from the Terminal station to Sixteenth street will become fashionable shopping thoroughfare in the course of few years, and by the time the next census is taken there will not be a wooden house left on either side of 10 blocks of the avenue"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

and the spirit of the banqueters left noth- Ing to be desired.
 "Gadsden is a splendid little city anu one of the coming centers of the state. US people are full of civic pride, and u ls a pleasure to spend a while among them'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
 Every man in parade acts as if it's all for him.
 A thing that is easy gets very hard just by hecoming duty.
 A man thinks he's active in politics when he knows the names of two sen ators.
 It takes 8 heap of conceit for one to think he's better than his ne:ghbor. and everybody has 1t.
 A girl learns to estimate men from studying her brothers and then not to from studying ether girls brothers.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
SUPERVISING.

Here Is something in this newspaper don't understand"
 What IS it about?"
 A news dispatch tells of a prominent man who has just bought some Angora bitters. Do you suppose the reference Is U Angostura bitters?"
 Tt may possibly be that, though I am more inclined to think that the word bit ters' may be typographical error for hutters' and the reference is to Angora goats"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
THE YOUNG HIGHLAND ROVER

By Burns. Loud blaw the frosty breezes,
 The snaws the mountains cover: Like winter on me seizes,
 Since my young Highland rover Far wsrders nations over. Whereer he go, where'er he stray,
 May Heaven be his warden; a Return him safe to fair Strathspey, And bonnie Castle-Gordon. The trees now naked grooming,
 Shall soon wi leaves be hinging, The birdies dowie moaning,
 Shall a he blithely singing.
 And every flower be springing, Sac I'll rejoice the lee-lang day,
 When by his mighty Warden My youths returned to fair Strathspe1 And bonnie Castle Garden.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
ENRAPT.

ENRAPT. Though violet time Is far away, The hards, we find, Are wondrous gay And blithely trill Of winters wane And buds that soon Will blow again. Such optimists,
 A cheery lot; How soon are all Life's ills forgotl Why, every time
 They think of spring, Forthwith you'll hear Them start to singl Though darkling clouds Obscure the sky And keep most hearts From beating high, The poets trill.
 Quite free from care, And feed in dreams On visions fair!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
THE DOOM OF THE WAITER

haps, from nowhere, borne on swift wings, rising from the floor like Frederick the Greats famous table, by tube or tunnel, there will appear the food but not the waiter.
 How many things will vanish with the waiter The tip, dearest evil of all the corruption of social existence, daily sub ject of protest in the press, weekly oc- casion for denunciation in the pulpit, thes vice all men abhor, and enjoy; placing their coins with secret ostentatIon upon the plate to challenge the admiration of companion and purchase the approval of the beneficiary.
 Gone too will be the daily banter the habitual unbending, the small condescen- sion disguised as extreme good humor, the slight patronage which is the es- sence of true democracy. For our favor- ite pleasantly. long ago become a GUS tom, the required comment of the weather, the unfailng criticism of the menu. there will be substituted only the silence of the machine, the unsatisfying unstimulating tinkle of the bell which rings once, and then no more, until the appetite's expansion claims another rec ord
 A stupid fellow, this friend the waiter, but still sly one; the maker of many miracles, of landsips of china and earth quakes of metal, yet able to gauge to fraction the faults, the not unattractive weaknesses, foibles. harmless vanlties, of his charges. Will a machine supply his place? Will food mechanically delivered make up for all that now takes the place of food? Is it permitted to us to doubt? 
 the Harry Howard shirt but he held no cards. No one was in 1t. There was nothing to it but the Caruso turkey trot." Let Maurice look to it. His fame is in danger.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

Governor Hadley of Missouri and Gov ernor stubbs of Kansas are both out for the colonel, and the steam roller will have uphill work in those states.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27
Oakley Enioyed Banquet

James c. Oakley, president of the state convict board. returned to Birmingham yesterday morning after having attended the business mems banquet at Gadsden Wednesday night.
 'The banquet was an elegant affair." stated he. Governor O'Neal was the guest of honor and the principal speaker. He made a splendid address and delivered it in fine style. The menu was elegant
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

The Rev. Madison C. Peters or New York has established grocery store in his church in order to reduce the cost of living among his parishioners.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

Three hundred old square grand pianos are to be burned when the National Piano Dealers association meets at Atlantic City in May.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

The woman candidate for senator in Colorado declines to run. She says the time has not arrived to elect woman to the United States Senate.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

Colonel Roosevelt is letting his friends do the booming. He says nothing but sim ply waits for developments.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-01-27

The Duke of Connaught scarcely recog- nized the town that he visited Al years before. New York does change some in that period of time.