The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1912-02-22
THE THINGS WOMEN Do TO EACH OTHER
There Is the Person Who Used to Go to School With
You and Pursues You at an Afternoon Recep-
tion.- The Married Ones Combine.

Il saw a nightmare on the street the
other day." said Sal.
"A nightmare on the street--my
dear girl! May ask what you had had
for dinner" murmured the cynic.
1T flashed past me-" said Sal. then
stopped in a doorway and waited til l
came along. It drooled at me-" whis-
pered Sal bugging out her eyes.
Good heavens, Sarah said the
cynic edging around the table, don't
you think you'd better consult the
doctor?"
Then" went on Sal dramatically,
1T swooped down on me. grabbed me
by the arms
Its q lunacy commission you need
exclaimed the cynic walking toward
the telephone.
And said" went on Sal without
noticing
why don't you remember me-"
This is the first authentic informa-
ton I've ever had as to the ways and
habits of nightmares" declared the
cynic. I'm going to write an article
about It,"
"You can't publish it in my column"
said Sal
Then I'll read it at the State Teach
ers' Association and you'll be dis
graced for life
"Oh, cut it out" replied Sarah. You
interrupted my story. When she grab
bed me by the arms I had to admit I
k@ but didn't re
course l did but I pretended not for
good and sufficient reasons" sweetly
smiled Sal--"she was one of those
persons who used to go to school with
you-you know EN-"
well, of course they don't bother
the men as much as they do your
charming SEX" grinned the cynic.
"Still I can readily understand how
annoying they may make themselves
at times"
Don't get off any sympathy gags
said Sarah loftily, Il neither need nor
want them"
There is one thing that is under
mining my belief in the soundness of
our educational system" interpolated
the cynic. THAT is your skillful and
una shamed use of slang"
Don't expect us to keep the pose all
the time-it isn't human" said Sal.
However," she pursued, these peo-
pie who used to go to school with you
are a nuisance. You see somebody at
a party glowering at sou from cor
ner. You manouvre round to outflank
her but it's no use.
she confronts you and smiles a
gladstone, false-teeth smile. You gaze
at her in Mortified fascination and
humble something or other.
why surely you haven't forgotten
me- she vociferates in a loud. healthy
tone of voice. Don't you remember
little Mary Bonicus? And the times we
used to have in the fifth grade-you
were always u class or two ahead Of
me, you know looked upon you as
one of the older girls-your birthday
I remember was on September 18th
and mine on the 14th and we always
had our birthday parties together al
though. of course, you were several
years older than I. l remember in 40
when was ten and you we're"
"Oh. Of course Of course" you muir
muir to choke her off-"why Mary Bon
icus-little Mary-how charming to
see you again-how young you're look
ing (base lie. since she has the gen.
eral appearance Of your last years
grandmOther)-I really think, though,
you've gotten me mixed up with my
sister Jane (Jane lives out in Seattle
SO you're perfectly safe)-Jane was
much older than Indeed if you
think 1t was 40 it must have been
Jane because 1 had not then arrived
on the scene-but I'll write Jane and
tell her-there is q strong family re-
semblance, you know. and it was nat
ural you took me for Jane-I remem-
Der when a mere child to have heard
Jane talking about you and wondering
where you were-and-you certainly
are looking very well-and so young
no one would imagine
"'Oh. no. it wasn't Jane-I can hard
~ remember her. interrupts the fiend.
l always was ON dates-always got
"A" in history-no-I'm not mistaken
and was always so fond of you-
you never can fool me on a date-my
husband says
oh. Of course-do tell me about
your husband you murmur hastily
I'D love to hear about him. Is he
err"
He died three years ago. says
she who was little Mary Bonicus, with
undiminished cheerfulness. such
loss-I thought l couldn't stand it, she
continued with a resigned smile, but
We all have to suffer-we must bear
up want YOU to see my boy-he's-'
Delighted" you whisper. Some
other day. then"
But you can't get away from her."
cried Sal. She pursues you in and