davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08
$LDvER !:!;. fro" STICK
~ by stick - Himself

An Cngratcful Whelp-He went in swimming at the
seashore the other day hanging his trousers in the bath
house and leaving his best girl, Becky, on the beach.
upon returning to the bath house. trousers and money
were gone. Edelson-for that is his nane-lct out a
yell, when someone suggested he get a barrel. Think
ing they said his pants We're in the barrel, he ran to
that receptical where a crowd seized him and chucked
him in and rushed him to the water.
My trousers. Becky" he screamed, as they hustled
him past his blushins partner of the day.
A policeman rescued him from the waters and found
that his trousers had been stolen. a bath attendant
appeared with a pair of trousers and Edelson claimed
them and accused the man of theft.
The attendant. BENJAMIN Rath. said he found them
and wanted to know whose they were. The money was
gone. Edelson charged Rath with larceny and he was
arrested, which was very unkind in Edelson.
Tho Troublesome Judge.-Judge Cornelius II. Ham
ford. of Seattle. is the cause of much trouble. and the
Investigation in his case is up to par when it comes to
mysteries. For some time the house Judiciary sub
committee has been entertaining private detectives and
bartenders on the subject. These have been dismissed
and now the committees is at a loss to decide whether
the judge was intoxicated or suffering from physical
WEAKNESS and infirmities. when. according to the testi-
mony. he dozed on street cars. nodded in court and
Wa'ered in his walk. Technically. ii would be hard to
determine.
-
Ed Howe says: The doctrine that a rich man can't
get into heaven doesn't satisfy MS poor people as much
as the author of the statement intended; anyway. We
tell other mean stories on the rich.
I'd like to symrathize With you;
I sure would. but I know
You II keep me here on hour or two
And stretch your tale of woe.
Down AT Cakes there are several pesky bull dogs
which insist on chewing the souse Of the neighbor's
pigs. Editor kellogg. Of the Journal. takes exceptions
to the unruly conduct of the caniners, and threatens
trouble in the way IF shooting unless the outrases
cease. Wonder if the pigs belong to "keg?"
jay MalthN is putting up a pretty good article in his
Foreman independents ews~-and-stranCe to saw some
kick because Jay knows how to run his own business.
And now some are saying that BRYAN should be
eliminated, Eliminated from what ?-he's not in it.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

jay MalthN is putting up a pretty good article in his
Foreman Independents ews-and-strance to saw some
kick because Jay knows how to run his own business.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

We don't know who the New York Herald il striking
at, but this is what it says:
Only four years ago on the Fourth Of July,
at Denver. a great Bryan rainbow spanned the
sky, and the Promised Land. as viewed from
the altitude of Pixies Peak, seemed surely
democratic. Eight years ago. at ST. Louis. the
rosy complexion of Parker doomed across the
political armament with all the signs Of vic
tory. But. alas! Presidents are not elected in
midsummer.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08
Report Nav Be Turned Down.

It Is understood that II the COM
mittee reports as above indicated the
city council will turn the report down.
Several Of the councilmen claim that
the owners in the district should pay
the extra cost on the ground that the
city at large has already paid for the
lighting system, the curbing and the
so-called paving of nine years ago. II
the city fathers hold to this attitude
they of course will reject the report.
If they do this they can appoint an
other committee and get a report
more suitable t. the council. Then
the property owners. II not satisfied.
can take their case into the district
court and have a jury trial.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08
COST WILL GO
ON CITY At
LARGE
Special Assessment Commit
tee Will Report to coun-
Gil in Near Future.

While the special assessment COM
mittee, appointed by the council to
apportion the cost of the paving on
DeMers avenue. have o officially
made their statement to the council,
it is understood that the surplus cost
of the paving will fall upon the city
at large, if the council follows out the
report Of the committee.
The plan followed out by the COM
mittee in completing their work and
deciding who was to pay for the SIS
feet Of paving abutting the Northern
Pacific property, was to assess the
property in the paving dis
trict for benefits received. and then
after this had been figured t. report
the balance out of the general paving
fund. In other words. the city at
large will pay the bigger part Of the
cost of the SIS feet, the committee
figuring the benefits to the city at
large being as great as the benefit to
the property in the paving
district.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

And now some are saying that BRYAN should be
eliminated, Eliminated from what ?-he'S not in il.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

I'd like to symrathize with you;
sure would. but I know
YomM keep me here on hour or two
And stretch our tale of woe.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

Someone has discovered and announced that this il
the first time the names of two governors have got to
gether on a national ticket since the democrats noni
mated Governor Samuel j. Tilden and Governor Thon,a
a. Hendricks in 1875.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

Faithless Dcccivcr.-The members of the American
colony at Rome tell of the despair and Indignation of
a noble son of Italy. who. under the impression that
the father of the young woman in question was pos
sessed of great wealth, had placed his title at her dis
posal. One afternoon. however, the Young MARQUIS
rushed in upon his fancee. upbraidins her by crying:
Cruel. heartless girl, You sWore YOU loved me, and
now discover that Your father is a bankrupt"
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

A man at La Noure was kicked by a blind horse, bu
he was doing.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

Helen Rowland Feels Easicr.-She says:If there is n,
marrying in heaven. at least a woman will be spared
the agony of having to fix over her last years halo Il
make II look exactly like this years Paris creation.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

Ed Howe says: The doctrine that a rich man can
get into heaven doesn't satisfy MS poor people as much
as the author of the statement intended; anyway. we
tell other mean stories on the rich.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-08

A Flemish tapestry was sold in London the other da
a thing.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
First Picture Postal Cards In 1870.

In Nuremberg they have been max
Ing arrangements to celebrate tho
thirtieth anniversary Of the picture
postal card with q congress and ex-
position this year. Unfortunately for
their plans. however, II has been dis
covered that the irst picture postal
card was not made In Germany Dr.
sent from Nuremberg. nor was II born
In 1882. ~ they had supposed. The
distinction Of making and mailing the
first 10 nov claimed by Loon Besnar-
deau, q book seller Of Sille-le-Guil-
laume. near Conlic. department OF
Sarthe. France. In 1870. during the
war with Prussia. he printed pictures
on postal cards no was mailing to
clients. M. Besnardeau 10 still alive
and there are many Of his old Gus
toners In France who have the cards
he mailed them. The Germans adopted
the idea for the Nuremberg exposition
In 1881.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
WHEN MISS ANTHONY FAILED
Slowed In psfsat Before Her Wemsn's
Mature, Though Probably che
Never Knew Il

In an article on "A Woman and
Her Rciment" IN the American Maya
siAs, Ida ~. Tarbeli has the following
to cay about bloomsrs:
The story Of the bioomsr 10 n
quaint II was launched and worn. II
became the subject Of platform ora
tory and had it, organ. Why II Il
mot o todayf No woman who has
ever masaueradsd In mans dress o.
dophed II for climbing viii sTer for
get the frsedoms OF II. Vet the only
woman In the Christian world who
W wors II at once naturally and
with that touch % ooQustry watch ID
~nscsssary to sssry n Of. - far - this
writer's personal ebssrvstiea goa
was Nine. Disulaioy. and Ana. nlsui,
atnY wss Protested ~ ~ Ysvnoh
gevsrnmeat - q exclusive etppia.
~Hloomofs proved too much IT,
even ~ eouraee Of dsar lGiss A.
theay. ~ two yssrs ne wore Tier.
~ ~ Win teoys ana IaHenlot1oaa
Mpa1zl1-tl&esh ~ .rasigaa1las
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Not Guilty - Charged.

According to Joe o'Neil. Tin Fang.
who operates 4 thriving fan-tan game
down on Mott street, New York. found
II necessary to repress q kicker the
other day. II happens that Mr.. Fang
also has a professional connection
with a restaurant. and that day had
taken q butchers cleaver from the
kitchen TO his gambling room. that he
might sharpen II In his moments Of
leisure. II was this wide-bladed ax
that he seized when he undertook to
abate the human nuisance. THE next
day he was arrested" said Mr.. O'Neil.
and the copper that made the pinch
brought this cieaver into court as evil
denoe. The magistrate looked old Tin
Fang over.
"Did you try to Kill the complain.
ing witness!' he asked.
"'No. no. dubbed old Tin Fang.
Me no fly TO kill um.'
"'He did so.' said the copper. He
tried TO kill that guy Wit this here
cisaver. your honor
"Is this charge trusf' asked the
court severely. Tin Fang saw that II
WAS up to him to clear himself.
"'No. no. he chartered. NO. tly
kill UNI with cleavel. XIII um with
I'LL bite knife--no blig cleavel 1t all"
Case and Comment
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
MISS DOROTHY De voNDA, THE BALLooNIsT
ASCENSiONS EACH DAY AT THE MISSOURI
STATE fAR---A FEAST OF ADJUSTMENTS
The Ringings in Feature Acts, Original and Cassy---The Five Sisters
Merkel in Their Marvellous, Lightning Acrobaic Acts Which Have
Atonshed Thousands in Europe and America.

~HE SPECIAL Attractions Sc
cured by the Directors Of the
State Fair for the entertain
ment and amusement OF the visitors
to the twelfth annual State Fair and
Exposition OF the wonderful resources
Of Missouri. to be held at sedalia. NO..
during the week commencing septem-
ber 20. and closing October I. are the
best ever obtained.
The free exhibitions and special at.
fractions In past years have been
high class. but the daily program for
the Fair Of 1912 Is far superior 10 any.
thing ever before arranged to please
visitors at q State Fair.
The leading features Of the lengthy
program OF entertainments to be given
on the elevated stage oppssits the
commodious steel grand stand include
the following:
The Five Sisters Merkls In their
lightning acrobxtic acts. which crested
. Juror 1t the great New YORK. Hippo
droms. II 10 claimed for the ave sis-
tors that they ara the most msrvsloua
female acrobats svsr brosght to Amor
lea.
Hvsryons enjoys Z balloon sscsnsion
and the thrilling ssnsattons whicA are
incident 70 u dartas pasaehuts lsap
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
MISSOURI STATE FAlR---AN INSTITUTION
WHICH BELONGS TO MSSOURANS
Features Of Educational Interest TO the Young and hd---WonderUi Dis.
play Of Progressive MissourTs Choicest Products---The Boys Corn
Growing Contest and the Big Corn Show---AmusementP Program.

the exhibition OF the products raised
In each particular county. This year
many OF the counties have made large
appropriations OF money TO insure a
splendid display of products.
The educational exhibits by the
State University. the State Norm1ls.
School OF Mines. the high and grade
schools OF Missouri ia one OF the most
interesting and inspiring features OF
the state Fair.
Harness and ~runslng races, the
night horse shows. the various free
special attractions. the machinery ex-
habits. the prize stock parades. music
by Thaviu's great Chicago band, COM
plete an amusement program unsur-
passed for the enjoyment Of visitors.
The citizens OF Sedai'a. under the
direction OF the Sedalia Boosters
Club. undertake to furnish all visitors
to the Fair with accommodations at
reasonable prices. Ov~er-charying is
not permitted and patrons 81 the great
exposition will be treated o. guests
and friends. II n visitor In unac.
quainted In Sedalia he should seek
the Bureau u Information Immediately
upon reaching the city.
The Missouri State Fair has always
been held during the first week In
October. This year the dates are
September 2s 10 October 4 inclusive.
Mark the opening day on your calen-
dar and decide TO spend the whole
week at the best fair In the United
States.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

obedience TO moral Law will not
bring prosperity. necessarily. but It
will enable . man to do without II; II
will ennoble poverty. Goodness is its
own ~paymaster. There 10 no need to
make goodness attractive BY artificial
rewards: no need to make vice for.
bidding BY arbitrary punishments. The
fearful punishment Of lying 10 to be a
liar; the fearful punishment OF vice IL
TO Be . vicious man; the horrible pam
ishment OF beastliness ID to be q beast.
Tho splendid reward Of being good 10
to b. . good man. You love your
husband and wife and children and
friends. Do you ask for more than
the Joy and privilege Of lovingf"-A
Modern Preacher.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Perpetuating The
Past

HOW few OF US there are, who
have not hidden away In some
bureau or closet, some almost
forgotten. almost faded picture
memories OF dear ones who
have passed to the Grea. Be.
yond.
Possibly. too, we have been
fearfully watching, as the years
go round. the steady but reient.
less fading that romises ere
long to make Il Q ,dear treas.
eres but a memory indeed.
Perhaps II Is some old daguer.
reotype In Its little old worn-out
leather case. shown on Its
dimmed silver surface the
quaint picture Of some grand.
parent. or a father or mother In
the baby days. with little straR.
ely curls and the low.necked
dress affected In those good
old days Of the Victorian per.
Tod.
Maybe tits and ambrotype. or
one OF those old.fashioned cartes
QC vl1ttC 0niIn WSiS aii kuS EokC
thirty years back. when every
sitting.room table held the
family.
There were good photographs.
ers In those days, but they had
not the facilities OF modern poP.
tPait.maker. and the vauntsd
permanence Of the pictures was
more In the name than In fact.
Why not perpetuate these old
picture n while thereis
yetan opportunity2 Anew years
hence even the faintest outlines
may have vanished forever.
Modern methods end modern
papers will give you Z lasting
copy 0f such pictures. and skill
fuI work will preserve to you
The portraits that you have ~
most deopalred Of and give them
to You u most GASES even clear
g and moro reminiscently than
the fs ded copies you now have.
why not bring these old pho.
ktruthfully tsII You whether ittD
To late y save them.
N((le0y'xS lulla
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
GO EASY ON HEALTH FADS
Trouble 10 That They Cannot Be
Made TO Suit the Physical Make
Up Of All People.

Cleveland is the homo OF the new
est fad. The Ohio city. has q Keep
Well" club composed Of persons who
believe In restricting indulgence IN
food. They fast now and then from
q week TO a month. One apostle of
the cult declares he has found abound
Ing health in q diet OF eight quarts Of
milk daily for eight months.
II may be that this foodless life In
beneficial TO some Clevelanders. Il II
probably also true that many people
In other cities-perhaps sven some In
Detroit-eat too much. particularly in
the summer time. But II IL equally
probable that many imitators Of the
cult will starve themselves beyond
tho endurance point Of weak hearts
and 80 commit virtual suicide.
II 10 Just at this point that so many
health. beauty. and nostrum fads be-
come 20 deadly and SO damaging,
Every wellinformed person knows
that . wise medical practitioner when
called to attend . sufferer. must try
TO adjust his remedies to the physical
powers and idiosyncrasies Of the pa.
tient. The remedy which acted like
magic In the ase Of Jones who had
Ia grippe may prove useless and actin.
ally dangerous to Smith. owing to
some disturbance Of Smiths digestion,
weakness Of his heart. or what not.
30 with health fads. Hence. before
becoming any sort OF q faddist see
your family doctor;-Detroit Fres
Pres.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
pIseh.d Mary Garden for Less.

plWehsd Mary Garden for Lees.
In m article on baseball fans" IN
the August American Magazine Hugh
8. Fullerton tells the following story:
"Ons Of the quickest things ! .
heard was q remark from O Washing.
ton fan which upset Frank Isbell. the
veteran. completely. Isbell's head 10
a. bald as q concrete pavement and
usually he kept his cap plastered
tightly on hs head to shield himself
from the Hbes OF crowds. This time
he tried to steal second. and made .
desperate. diving slide around and un.
der the baseman. only to be called out.
He was 70 enraged that he ran at the
umpire. grabbed his arm. argued and
raved and finally In sheer anger jerked
on his cap. hurled II onto the ground
and Jumped upon II. His bald head
giistened IN the sunlight and the
crowd roarsd. Then above the oar
came . vosoe:
"1Put ON that CAP They pinchsd
xary oazdsa herr for less than that"
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Man the on,y Seasoning Animal.

Men act according to knowledge and
r~easonin% ability. Other animals act
by instinct born with them. and upon
which they improve. birds
build the same kind OF nests RICH,
along. Men are always using their
ability to improve their houses. In
etinct Ia the name for the inferior
kind OF knowledge the lower orders OF
creation naturally possess. In some
cases. m with dogs. horses. etc. this
n be increased by careful training,
or even by imitation.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

from q monster a bag. a thousand
feet or more In the air to the earth.
Miss Dorothy Devonda. one OF the
best known balloonists In the United
States and famous as an air-woman,
has been engaged to make daily hal
loon ascensions and parachute leaps.|
Every n OF her acts In the ais are
new and e~xcitingly daring.
Tho famous Ringlings. Who vill|
furnish an ever-shifting entertaiamsst,|
embracing various kinds Of acts,|
which are decidedly original and fuaiy''
satisfying. are . whole show In them
selves. Their acts viii amuss and
please TO the fullest the Thousands
who will b at the Missouri State pair
September 2s-Octobsr 4.
There are many other free sxhthL'
tions on the amusement program aad.
there viii be something doing every
minute Of the day q the State vAir.|
There win BE- trotsing. pacing aaa nn-|
ming aces for rich pursss snd svesp.'
stakeS on each day Of the Eais. IAsse
will b. no zone big day" uvsry day
viii b . sbis day yet \ Nm ~
worth the visitors time 70 49, :
whols vesh At the Fsir ana - "a
- N great sxpositioa a NiassusyS
voaasrfsl Dsodueta.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

In a d~ilapidated old vault in q
~ehurchyard In Philadelphia. contain
ing the bones Of some colonial man or
maiden, . group Of registering men
were found the other night. laughing
talking. smoking and shooting craps
The vault IN which they sat was the
oldest In Old Trinity and It is falling
into decay. For more than a week
residents OF the neiehborhood had
heard uncanny sounds emanating FROM
the churchNrd after midnight. and
the place was believed to be haunt
ed"
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Jack and Bean.

Lord 81. Levan owns that roman.
ticaily beautiful Cornish fastness. 81.
Michael's Mount. Among other leg.
ends 81. Michsel's Mount ia supposed
70 have been the scene OF the fairy
tale OF Jack and the Beanstaik." and
hence come the nicknamcs OF Jack
and Bean" borne by Lord st. Leyan
and his next brother. Major Edward
81. Aubyn.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Joined His First Love In Death.

After an absence Of over 20 years, a
former aged resident Of Rainham. Kent.
England. returned to the district late
the other night. and. cropping his way
through tie to.Jl.tones In the local
cemetery. found tie graves Of his
frnt vile and gon. a5d there shot him.
self. The man, who carried on bust.
ness II C-ca. Peter street. westmins-
ter, posted d letter from Rainham 10
his second We. aud his daughter. ~.
ing he haG cess - io.n Lila nrst yifs
and son.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
Mia. Anthony p.Id trIbute. uncou

Miss Anthony paid tribute. uncon-
sciously no doubt, to something deep
er than she ver grasped in tho wom-
an question. Her valiant soul met
It's master in her own nature. but she
did not recognize II. She abandoned
her convenient and becoming costume
because OF prejudice. she said. What
other prejudice o. dismayed her!
She thrived on fighting them; she met
her woman's soul. and did not know
I'll"
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
HE MISSOURI State Fair since
lis institution twelve years ago

TIE sNHtt fhiT sihCt
lis institution twelve years x
has grown In greatness with
wonderful rspldity. The first expo
sition OF the States u Vas a
good one and in eacn succeeding year
Il has been larger and better. The
reason for this surprising energy Is
because the fair belongs to the peo-
pie. II Is the one state Institution
which Ia exclusively owned by Mis-
s%ourians. The people Of the state take
pride In the fair because II Is their
fair. their display OF farm. garden.
orchard and vineyard products. The
fair Is a progressive institution made
80 by the progressive stockmen and
farmers OF Missouri.
The Boys Corn Contest. held an.
nually. has created a widespread in.
terest In corn breeding. In growing
better corr and more Of II TO the acre.
and the annual corn show has become
Q recognized feature OF the Fair.
The exhibition OF horses. cattle.
sheep and swine Is the equal each
year OF the best stock shows OF the
world. and the increasing interest In
the raising OF thoroughbrcds has been
brought about by the exhibition At
the Missouri State Fair OF many OF
the finest and most prominen, herds
in this country.
The County Exhibits are increasing
In number each year aud a friendly
rivalry has been established among
the different sections OF the state In
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
EnaIand,s Last IoIIaats.

The distinction OF being the last toll
gate In England Is now claimed by q
gate In the cambridgeshire Fens. one
and a half miles from Chatteris. on
the main road to ~somersham. The gate
stands In the middle OF a section OF
about two hundred yards. once pri-
vately owned. and was erected over
two hundred years ago. II was eventu.
ally purchased by a London company
for $4,000.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30
No Longer Forbidden City.

Lhasa. which is the capital oil Tibet,
for generations known an the Forbid.
den City. because OF It's political and
religious e1clusivencss. In 1904 q
British armed expedition opened the
mysterious old city. Previous to that
time practically every European trav-
eler had been stopped In his efforts
70 reach the place. Tho population OF
Lhasa Is about $4,000.
The Marshall republican., 1912-08-30

Burglars entered Ernest Dyer's
store at Blosser Wednesday night
OF last week and blew open the
safe, securing about So In cash.
They twisted the handle off the
safe with a wrench, then poured
powder into the hole and touched
1t off. The checks in the safe
were not taken.
The Marietta journal and courier. (Marietta, Ga.) 1909-1918, 1912-07-05
Wanted II, and Got II.

Here is story that will be as pleas
ing to true American as it will be
obnoxious to a European. Arthur
Gleason tells it of Joseph Fels in the
Worlds Work. 1t is about Mr.. Fels'
invasion of London.
He looked around the streets a bit,
and found the Office he wished, the
right situation and right size.
I'll take it, he said to the owner.
But that is not customary. To
whom will you refer me? To your so
licitor?"
81 haven't any"
But friends of yours in London?''
81 came here yesterday, haven't got
acquainted with anybody yet. Here's
the rental money for the first six
months. Take it or leave it."
But won't tomorrow be more salts
factory for coming to a settlement"
That's one day too late. l want
the office today, now"
He got his Office.