Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-07-14

prisidintial ilictor, an I'll want. yeer
help Why, me poor fri'nd, 1t can't
be that bad with ye.' says l. Have
We lost all ye'er inioonce with Roger,
that We shud sink so low in ye'er
pollytickal ambition? Cudden't We get
to be dep'ty coroner. or bailin, or
something else honorable? Come
SAYS 1, don't be discouraged. Be a
man. Think 1t over a little longer.
Consult with ye'er fri'nds. We ought
to be able to find somethin' f'r We.
Don't says I, put ye'ersilf into a posi-
ton where tn neighbors can pint tn
finger Nv scorn at ye'er childher an
say that their pah-pah. who had been
q bridgetender in eighteen eighty-nine.
had sunk so low as statesman In
nineteen-twelve that he'd accepted
fob as PRESIDENTIAL ilictor,' says I. But
Hogan winked his eye an says he: II
It's as good as 1t looks. / wudden't
thrade it FIR a life term as county
threasurer,' he says An thin he ex-
planned 1t to me.
I'VE see, tits this way, Hinnissy:
Durin' all me pollytickal life. maxim
a man a PRESIDENTIAL ilictor was jist tn
same as sindin' him to tn pound Whin
q man had been FORCED to tn edge Nv
tn pa-arty tn leader says: Now.
boys. we'll push him over. Wen make
him a prisidintial ilctor.' If all tn
PRESIDENTIAL iIictors I've liver known
was gathered together, they wuddsn't
have pollytickal inhoonce enough to
git fri'nd appinted to cart in tn
sthreet cleanin' departmint- II man
wasn't ayen sthrong enough to be an
ambassadure. he was made an ilictor
All that was asked was that he shud
be respectable an had done somethfn
FIR tn pa-arty which it didn't apprecy-
ate enough to put him on tn ticket fr
a county Office Whin tn good fell
lows had filled all tn Jobs that had
vouchers attached to thin, they In
suited wan Nv tn candidates whose
vote was put down as 'scatterin' be
namin' him to name tn Prisidint.
TT was dirrent firm tn way tn
fathers Nv tn country had intinded
it. Twas their idee. Hogan says, to
have tn ignorant voters get together
an pick out a fine lot Nv intelligent
men who'd assimble in wash'n'ton an
choose somebody like Jawn Adams fr
Prisidint But there was NANNY a
thing tn fathers iv tn country plan
ned that didn't happen tn way they
thought it wud, an this was wan iv
chin.
I'm time tn ignorant voter took 1t
away firm tn higher intillig1nces,
which is a way tn ignorant voter has.
an says he: Tn too busy to go down
to wash'n'tcn to till Congress who I
want to be PrJsidint. TIL pick out
some wan to do il fr me. Here, me
good fellow, We look as il We hadn't
anything else to do. Do We Jump on
a thrain an hurry down to tn capital
an let thin know there that I'm fr
So-an'-So ~ Prisidint an So-an'-so fr
Vice Prisidint. An don't We git tn
names mixed. or It's into tn river ye
go whin ye come back So tn i1ictors
met in their respectable states. &C
eoordin' to tn Constitution, an a full
account ~ their deliberations was
printed In tn German newspapers.
Wan ilictor was SELECTED FIRM each state
TO go to wash'n'ton With tn glad It'd
ms. At tn capital they were well
coined with hearty laughter. an about
tn time tn Prisidint-ilict had COM
pIeted hts cabinet an rarned his
inauguration speech be heart an was
on'y wsitin' fr his new suit to come
home fr the tailors. befure hoppin'
into tn White House. they assimbied
in solemn ocnclave an iiicted him
Prisidint An whin they came back
an announced to tn Ignorant Voter
that they'd done his biddin'. says he:
IT'S . good thing fr - - did Ys
can now dispArse peacefully to yv~s
homes won't want - amy more
But Hogan says tn smart fellows
has just Famed that tn collsdxs iv
iHnfors. n rs called. hos a NANNY
rights a. fvsr It had. an they're goin'
TO RESTORE their ancient institution.
He sa1s an ifotor can vote r. amy
body be wants to. an Il don't maks
amy d1Rrsncs how hes fns<h1ucAed
NJ mpss thin II does 10 tn ullno4a
dmyg.sss to q rspubaauan couvanefon
Thersb onothsr thing shout It. he says
an that IL. d'ys mind. that prisidinxia1
Hector can't be pinched fr hawin' hi.
Legitimate expenses to am firm wash'n'-
ton. be way Nv Iceland. Berin' sthraatl
an saberya. with . stopover In Paris
paid r. Be . candydate. In fact. says
he. an inctor cud stand In trout Nv tn
Capttol bui1din' with . coal scuttls in
his hand. raycedvfn conthr1butions Fl
his vots. an ns'er q poliaznan wud dAra
10 avsn asst him to move on. 7 got
that firm httls Levi. tn lawyer sayr