Camas Prairie chronicle. [volume] (Cottonwood, Idaho) 1901-1917, 1912-02-16
THE SALVE
OF LOVE
BY SARAH w. CHANNELS
Copyright by American Press Assoc
citation, 1911.


to make my purchases Of the days
supplies l pass little brick house
In a window of which sits. sewing. a
woman whose expression l have often
studied. but always failed to interpret
1t may be best described as the ex-
preston of one who has been disap-
pointed. but has accepted the disap-
pointment phiosophically. The most
surprising thing on the premises is
doorplate on which are the words.
Matrimonial Agency"
Now. | am happily married wo-
man and in no need of husband. for
mine is the best man in the world,
| and I am the mother of seven dear
children. In short. our family is
loving one But, having passed the lit
tie woman at the window many times,
my curiosity at last got the better of
me. and went In. I thought the best
way to gain information would be to
personate client. So I invited the
woman to explain her methods.
ITO begin WITH" she said, II don't
recommend matrimony to nobody. I'm
willn' to interduce them as Is banker
in after it. but I'm honest enough to
tell 'em that it's a good deal like dis
sipation-its foIlered by headache"
81 should think that would injure
your business" | remarked.
Not a bit. My opinion Is when peo-
pie get the matrimonial fever they got
to go through it just like any other
fever. only it's wuss, because most
people git over other fevers within
few weeks or months at most, but the
matrimonial fever usually lasts life
time. Most times 1t attacks some fell
Ter and some girl to onct. Sich cases
can't be stopped. The cases that put
through are those where man or
woman pines for mate.
"Now, you're likely lookin' woman,
and l don't want to do you no harm,
but l advise you to let matrimony
alone. You'll only jump from the fry
ing pan into the fire. You're used as
single person to dom a hundred diff
ferent things a day, none of 'em, meb-
be, of any importance. Just as soon
as you're married you got to stop
and think whether your husband will
approve of your dom any one Of 'em
the way that suggests itself to you.
Or If he's with you he'll tell you that
your way is not the best. IL you think
it RELY is the best, you got to argue
about it. When you've had scrap
over ninety-nine of these little mat
ters during the day, about the time the
hundredth comes up you'll be mighty
tired O the argument. What kind of
, a man do you wantT'
She asked the last question appar-
emily we'll satisfied that she did not
, consider her warning would be needed,
and having eased her conscience she
was ready for business.
well" l said. II think I'd like a
man who would always give me my
own way about everything. When
I'm feeling cross, | would like him to
pet me, and if l receive his caresses
coldly or snap at him. I'd wish him
, to still be as pleasant TO me as May
morning"
Look ahere,'' she interrupted, IL
amt in this business to sell Il million
dollars worth O. stuff for IS cents. II
you want that kind of man you'd
better so to a heavenly matrimonial
exchange and get an introduction to
an angel. What kind of a woman be
you?"
$50 far as human nature will per
NIT. I'm the kind of a woman as the
man I've described. / have seven
children and sometimes | tire meet
ing their requirements. but rub my
tiredness with the salve of love and
it takes it right out of ME. My hus
band comes home disappointed al
some failure he has made during the
day: ten to one our boy Jim has fall
ell into some dirty hole ana ruined Il
suit of clothes, so you see I'm ready
TO slap at his father. and his father
to slap back ut me. but before he
gets home | get out my love salve and
take good rubbing. and when he ap
pears am ready to cheer him up"
The woman followed me with curl
Gus glance while was saying this and
when | stopped said:
what kind of fancy picture are
you givin' me. anyway"
1T isn't II fancy picture: it's true
one. I'm really married and the mother
of seven children. In our medicine
: closet we keep a big pot of the oint-
ment of love. and my husband and
use it continually. AS for the children,
| they don't need to use It. They are
born with love in their hearts for their
parents and each other. Perhaps when
they grow Older a good rubbing with
7 the salve will save them much trou-
, bic, but while they are young their ir-
fitations are self healing. From what
you have told me | think it possible
that you may have tried to keep house
without a pot of this ointment in your
house. Get your family together and
use the love salve freely"
Without any further remark or apol-
ogy for calling l withdrew. A few
days later. when | passed the matri-
moniai exchange. 1t was closed. nei-
thar saw NOR hoard ANYTHING from tho