Baxter Springs news. [volume] (Baxter Springs, Kan.) 1882-1919, 1912-04-25
The Peeved
Bill Clerk

ton and perched himself. "His name
10 Timothy Hayseed. and he's from
Squash Center. He'd have stayed
there, but the COWS were always mis-
taking him for something to eat and
he got bitten up quite badly"
"How interesting" remarked the
cashier. "a very odd name, isn't it?"
well, I won't say that's his sure
enough name" the bill clerk kindly
explained. But 1t ought to be. He's
the worst jay you ever saw. He's got
freckles all over his nose and-here's
the joke:
AT breakfast he asked the landlady
for another plate of cakes. Honest!
And when she asked him II he would
MT like anything more-sarcastic you
know-he says. 4 believe I'll have an
other piece Of steak. please Just that
way. And he'd jabbed two pieces
when the dish went around. He's
looking for a job. think we ought
to make room for him here"
ibid the old lady throw the coffee
pot at his head?" asked the cashier.
"She ought to have" replied the
bill clerk. with a grin. Its q wonder
she didn't"
"She didn't then?"
"of course, she didn't" said the bill
clerk.
you don't mean to say that he got
his plate Of cakes and his steak?" de-
manded the cashier. Surely not?"
"of course. he did," answered the
bill clerk. did you suppose she'd
tell him he'd had all she could afford
to give him? What kind Of joint
do you think It is?"
well, WELL" said the cashier. mo
doubt It would be rather remarkable
II the good woman objected to supply.
ing more food than this rustic per.
son paid for"
"Oh, I guess he didn't get any more
than he paid for, II you come to that"
said the bill clerk.
1.-THE strange thing was that the
young man should ask for what he
wanted them" queried the cashier.
els that It, johnny"
IF you knew the old lady, you'd
think It was" said the bill clerk.
"And he got the cakes-and the
steak" said the cashier. HE certain.
ly must be a blockhead. II he'd
kept still he'd have had the pleasure
Of leaving the table hungry, in all
probability.
TITS to be hoped he will learn; II
he doesn't, it's hard to predict what
will become Of him.
ITO begin with, he'll 60 around ask
ing for a job, I suppose, and he'll
keep on asking until he gets it, in
stead Of politely waiting for the job
10 come to him. It's quite evident
that he hasn't any delicacy whatever.
Think Of a young man-with freckles
on his nose, too!-asking busy people
to give him work, Just because he
happens to want It. Shameful"
"Well, II you think It's all right to
put your feet in the trough, you car"
muttered the bill clerk.
'T'm not sure that 1t isn't all right,
II you happen to be hog and your
associates are hoggish," said the cash
Ter.
I'm not casting any reflections on
your boarding house." he continued.
II merely want to call your attention
to the fact that this is cold, cruel
world. It isn't enough to look hun
cry; you've got to holler for grub,
and that in no uncertain tone. II you
do that it's a hundred to one that
you'll get it."
'Your friend, Mr.. Timothy Hayseed,
Is making a pretty good beginning. II
you ask me. When he gets his job,
he'll ask about anything he wants to
know and then he'll ask for raise
Of salary"
"That's all the good 1t would do him
II he worked here" remarked the bill
clerk. .
'You can't ever until you try" said
the cashier. after he's got most Of
the knowledge regarding the busi-
ness" he continued, he'll ask for a
partnership, and he'll naturally get
that.
'In course Of time he'll ask the
other members Of the firm to retire,
and they will gracefully skidoo. II
they don't, he'll SCOOP in a majority
OF the stock and kick 'em out.
Having accomplished this, he'll ask
the principal firms in the same line Of
business to consolidate with him and
allow him to direct their destinies,
and they viii do SO.
"Then he will consider that his In
dustry is entitled to a little special
legislation of the fostering order, and
he will ask for II. II he can put up
the right kind Of an argument to the
commission, he'll get what he asks
Sor."
"Put up is good" commented the
bill clerk. $50 all you've got to do to
be the head of q trust is to ask for
another plate Of buckwheat cakes
when you are q young man. Is That