The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1912-07-13
%lDvER :!'. fro" STICK ST.!
~ by "Jtjck" ~ Himself
A RJp.SNORTER.

The National Prohibition convention held at Atlantic
speeches. Clinton N. Howard. of Rochester, made the
atmosphere suphurous by ripping up all parties and
candidates. He said we have two whisky parties now
and don't need another. He characterized Taft as a
wet nurse to the saloons" and his remark was met
with "amens." He said Roosevelt was the least desir-
able of all candidates and while Wilson might be a
good man, it must be remembered that we have had
good men in the white house before and they have gone
out with the country more saturated with rum than
when they went in. Howard swept the convention off
its feet with his speech and when the delegates got
their feet on the ground they had a genuine boom on
for him for president. All Of which reminds us of a
gentleman years ago who sprung into prominence by
saying something about a cross Of gold and a crown of
thorns. but he never got very far with his candidacy,
NO HE'LL FIRE AND BIRTHSTONE.
1t is getting easier boys: At their meeting this week
students association convention at WASHINGTON con-
demnins hell fire and birthstone as unscriptural, and
calling on all ministers of the Christian religion to let
the world know that they do not believe in anything
of the kind. Now come many ministers claiming that
the church never did believe in the pure article, and
claim that the resolution is regarded as something of
a joke. Well. if they never did believe in the old
birthstone idea, We have experienced a great many
gusts of hot air from the pulpits in years gone by.
HAVE TO STICK TO BLANK VERSE.
Summer poets constantly remind us that Boat
rhymes with Float but nobody has thus far advanced
anything that rhymes with "boat-rocker Duluth
Herald.
HOws THIS OLD HosS?
The Lord he loves the cheerful giver-
The Devil conceived the boat rocker
The Lord has pity for the liar,
But not for the 'joke-macher."
No bricks. please, We know it is rather coarse, but
We just had to get rid of it.
The Grand Lodge of Elks is the richest organiza-
ton in the world, its assets amounting to over $780,
100000. Portland lodge is worth over %s345,ooo. be-
ing the wealthiest of subordinate bodies.
LoNDoN's DAILY
The number of telephone calls in London every day
are said to average %1.250.00O. That amount of talk
would even put a womans thimble bee to shame
for quantity.
Busy ~Pcople-FIebe's notion Of the final syllable in
considerable BUSINESS is the gentleman who confded
that his time was SO taken up that he couldn't cash
the checks that come in the morning mail; which al.
most ties o. Henrys one-armed paperhanger who had
the hives.
An eastern daily heads its lists Of entertainment
houses. Where to Co." Some people get this informa-
ton without reading it in the papers. Sh. Hiram?
OF INTEREST TO MATCH-USERS,
Those who use matches by the thousand without Civ
ing their origin a passing thought may be interested to
know that though the first match appeared in England
as late as 1927. the idea seized a genius years before
that date. An advertisement in a Boston paper in
17SS reads as follows:
For travellers. mariners, etc. Promethean
fire and phosphorus: G. Watts respectfully
acquaints the public that he has prepared a
large quantity of machines of a portable and
durable kind, With pronlethean fire, paper and
match Enclosed, most admirably calculated to
prevent those disaereeable sensations which
most frequently arise in the dreary hour of
midnight. from sudden alarms, thieves, fire or
sickness"
Many Will remember that 1t was we'll along into the
70s before the tax was taken off of matches, and thew
were the old sulphur kind, costing 10 cents per box.