Evening star., 1912-11-17
Folks as They Are.
BY DIR. FRANK CRANE.

I'VE have no right" says Helps, TO
expect to meet many sympathetic peop.e
in the course of our lives And Sydney
Smith adds that Ito get human beings to-
gether who ought to be together is a
dream" If wrote De Tocqueville, Ito
console you for being born you must meet
with men whose secret motives are al
ways actuated by fine and elevated feel
ings you need not wait: You may go
and drown yourself Immediately. But if
you would be satisfied by few men
whose actions are in general governed by
those motives, and q large majority who
from time to time are influenced by them,
you need not make such faces at the
human race
Nobody is good: nobody is bad; we are
all $3.50 Look at yourself, with your
own mixture of good and bad desires.
your inner welter of courage and cow
ardice, honey and vinegar, gold and clay.
and when You go out to meet men and
women remember they are much the
same.
The most pathetic thing about us is the
way We torment the people we love and
live with. Oscar Wilde tells us that:
All men kill the thing they love.
The coward does it with a kiss.
The brave man with a SWORD.
Tor instance, sometimes a man who is
born old inarrics woman Who never
grows un-one OF these permanent chill
dren like Peter Pan. Now, u good deal
OF what the world calls sin IS merely the
persistence OF youth. When people viii
not grow old We send them to he'll.
1t is hard for mature people to under
stand youth because they take it not as
youth but as faulty adulthood. Conse-
quently. children lie to no one 50 much
as to their parents. In the average fam
lily the child is given every lnducement
to lie. Parents are good to their chill
dren, hut they are afraid of them, OF
their wide eyes that see too much. The
child soon learns that no one Is SO stupid
and impossible as the parent who does
not understand.
There are beautiful observation-disclosures
and mothers, humble hearted, who study
their chidren as Gods miracles and try
to learn OF them instead of trying to
teach them: But the usual parent oneis
to his child not his personality, but his
convictions He knows he does not fol-
low these convictions himself. He fears
the child will find him out. So he turns
him over 10 nurses and teachers. his
mistake is rooted in q noble desire. he
wants the child to be better than him
self Most of the cruelty and loveless-
ness in families arises from the desire
that those we love be better than We
Husband and wife regularly offer each
other. not themselves as they are. but
themselves as they think the other wishes
them to be. Hence they build their do
nestle happiness on a thin volcanic crust.
What blessing If we could all turn
from the god of things as they ought
TO be" and be converted to "the god of
thinss as they are" II one could be just
ones self. faults and all. and not be
everlastingly wearing masks and dyeing
ones moral hair, and sticking peacock
feathers in ones spiritual piumage. and
then il one could learn how good and
sweet and companionable and helpful
plain, ordinary folks are, and that God,
when he made common people, created
something. after all, tremendously more
interesting and wonderful than these
;kons OF our mind-to wit: Children.
wives. husbands and friends that are
ideally grand and sympathetic and un-
selfish.