The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1912-12-20
MRS. TOPHAM'S
INVENTION
A New Years
Resolution
By MILDRED JERNEGAN

Samuel Topham registered solemn
vow that on the very next day he
would set forth in quest of work for
the ensuing year-work that would
bring him in steady income with
which to support his growing family.
On the 2d day of January Mr. Top
ham usually had a brilliant idea-a
brain splitting conception of patent
dishwashing machine or a baby tender
that might take the place Of paid
nurSemaid, or an automatic flapjack
Eriddle which not only would grease
itself, but would also tip Il suspended
pitcher of batter so that one might
have a continuous succession of well
Drowned <lpjucks as fast as one could
remove them from the self grcasing.
nOnhurning. self adjusting griddle.
Anything in the way of work saver
or labor eiminator appealed to the in
ventive faculty of Samuel Topham.
AS these ideas attacked Samuel on
the second day of the new year, of
course he then abandoned the idea of
seeking manual labor and devoted
himself exclusively to the perfecting of
this latest patent. Under these cir
cumStanceS it became necessary for
Mrs. Topham to find some means of
supplying her husband and seven lit
tie daughters with food and clothing.
This she did by home baking She did
it cheerfully and without complaint,
for the Tophams. great and small, had
infinite faith in pas inventions and
contentedly scrimped and saved so that
one day all of them might live sumptu-
OuSly on the proceeds of his success
when it should really come to pass.
On this particular New Years morn
ing Samuel had registered his custom
ary vow with more than his accustom-
ed vigor.
"There's no use talking, Sarah" he
said. sinking heavily into kitchen
chair and looking appealingly at his
plump little wife from his prominent
light blue eyes, 81 haven't got the
heart TO see you go through another
year like the last. Tomorrow morning
l shall set out and find a job, some
thing that will at least bring us in
bread and cheese"
you've said that before. SAM" re
turned Sarah placidly. You haven't
got to worry about that. I'm making
enough from my baking to pay the gro
Ger and butcher, ana we can wear our
old clothes for little while longer |
am sure the automatic griddle will be
money maker. Why, whenever l feel
I .,
will have it when that automatic grid
die is on the market and YOU
Samuel lifted a fat hand and shook
his head sadly. I'm afraid that the
automatic griddle is not a success" he
announced in n hollow voice.
"NOt-a-success? Sarah Tophams
voice showed more genuine dismay
than it had done in the case of the
failure Of the dishwasher and the baby
tender, which had been the last two
inventions Of her husbands restless
brain. Now she removed her hands
from a bowl of flour and surveyed
Samuel's gloomy countenance with
severe look on her usually good ma
tured face. You have heard some
thing newY' she asked
Yes. | had a letter-a most pecul-
iarly worded letter-from Mr.. Bow
man." admitted Samuel, taking an en-
velOpe from his pocket and surveying
the superscription resentfully.
"Well, what did he say, Samuel?
You know you asked him for a candid
opinion of its merits. He's your sec
ond cousin and ought not to be afraid
to speak right out"
"He spoke right out" muttered Sam
uel bitterly.
what did he say?"
"He said" returned Samuel reluc-
family, that no one except an unmiti-
gated idiot and a constitutionally lazy
and shiftless loafer would ever have
spent a year Of Gods good time in
perfecting such a FOOLS idea as my
automatic griddle. | believe you might
call that candid opinion"
"Why-the-idea gasped Sarah Top
ham angrily.
81 shall seek a job tomorrow" went
on Samuel weakly.
He was surprised at his wife's
prompt reply. ITS a good idea, Sam
uel," she said energetically. I'm
afraid that we haven't capital enough
to wait until the gridde is Il success"
"Of course, Sarah, when you lose
faith in me | must go to the wall"
said Samuel Topham with dignity, and
50. folding the frankly written letter
of his second cousin, the inventor left
the kitchen and strolled into the par
lor Of the cottage, where his morris
chair was drawn before a glowing lit
tie air tight stove.
From the window he could see his
seven diminutive daughters cOasting
down the hill that sloped from their
cottage to the highroad. He sighed
deeply. If his wonderful schemes had
only carried out successfully these sew
en- daughters would each be an heiress,
wearing rich fur coats and ermine