davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.


[From the Chicago News.1
A girl thinks it a good sign if it reads
ice Cream
Love is the wine of life and marriage
is the morning after.
Happy is the home in which there is
no room for doubt.
Many little man carries around a big
opinion of himself
Few people really care for the answer
to any question they ask.
It's a poor excuse woman won't ac-
cept If she really wants one.
A woman judges the illness of her nus
band by the fuss he makes about it.
Actions do not speak half as loud as
written words in a breach of promise
suit.
The telegraph may annihlate distance,
but it takes the messenger boy to kill
time.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.
IFrom the Philadelphia Record

[F'rom the Philadelphia Record.1
1t isn't the live town that boasts of its
cemetery.
Fortunate is the man who BILE to
cash in his hopes.
Most of us have a bowling acquaintance
with the inevitable.
The only sure thing is the thing that
has already happened
1t is much easier to convert cash into
experience than experience into cash
In spite of her understudy the average
actress Is generally able to take her own
part.
Some men can't understand prosperity,
and some can't even understand those
who can.
When a man wearies of his old troubles
he can always find a few new ones to
take their place.
You can't always tell from the sort of
music it renders how much discord there
is in a church choir
Can you render me little financial as
sistance?,' asked the professional beSgar-
Charity begins at home, remarked the
victim of the hoId-up. True, SIR replie
the mendicant Permit me to give you
my card. 1t contains my address, and
Won can send ii there"
The man suffering from a violent at
tack of toothache entered the dentists Of
flee 'sDr. Pullem is out" said the At
tendant. ''WiH you waltz" Yes, the
patient replied simply. Here was bit
of valor that the world wots not of, for
instead of running away, the man hy
waiting, showed himself to be sublime
hero
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
HUhqOR or THE DIP

The Caller (waiting in the parlor)-Good
graciousi What was that awful crash?
Did somebody fall down stairs? Her
Small Brother--Aw that's nothing; It's
just sis Dreakin' in new hobble.-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Whats the purpose of that freak bill
yuo've introducedT" Nothing simpler
replied the western legislator. You read
about the bill in the papers, didn' { your
YES" ''And heard many people discuss
ing it?' Il did" well, that's the an
swer."-PhiIadeIphi public Ledger.
''Ragtine is dying out" says musical
journal If so, It is dying horrible and
lingering death.-Logan (W- W Banner
Bank President-But why do you wish to
work in a bank? Serious YOUTH believe
there's money in it.-Wall Street Journal
He-Does your father object TO my stay
ing so late? She-No; he says IL serves me
Egllt for being in when you cail.-Boston
Transcript.
Dorothes-What were you doing after
the aceider1t2 Notwithstanding up an
observation-disclosures Lampoon.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
SAYS UNCLE CAV

If God had been a section boss all
the world would be shoveIing dirt
and heaven would be a Weedy right
OF way. It's pretty good thing,
when you're finding fault with this
earth, to stop to find out if there
isn't something worth while outside
your own particular conception of
things.
The trouble with most of us-reH-
gionists. scientists. politicians and So
ciologists-who want to make things
over, is that our view isn't broad
enough. We're all specialists in some
thing, If we are successful, and the
specialist is necessarily more or less
narrow. We're cocks fighting well
enough upon our own dunghills and
demanding that the rest of the uni
verse be remodeled according to the
specifications of the old home place.
In word, our reformers wish to
conduct the making-Over process with
an eye single to their own good and
the advantage of their own particular
kind. The chances are that the pro-
posed changes don't suit the rest of
us at all. We're a diverse lot as like
only as peas in a pod, no two of which
ever have the same measurements.
what is meat for one is pretty likely
to be trifle poisonous for another
ana only happy average allows us
all to live in comparative peace and
happiness upon the planet.
Wherefore, take heed, We inspired,
and rail not too loudly if some of us
give you a quickening taste of the
toes you have trod on. It's not that
we object to your. making the world
better We only desire that you do
not make it uninha bitable except for
your own tribe.-(Copyright 1912, by
the Mcclure Newspaper Syndicate.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
DAFFYDMS
BY q. NoALL.

If Champ Clark took Taft, Bryan
and Teddy across the Delaware who
Woodrow Wilson?
(Cali in the executioneri Here's the
boob that put the tears in onions.)
Would it be right TO say that George
Washington was fond of lamb because
he took a chop at the cherry tree?
fNeither is 1t well to tell a temper
ance advocate that he is d corker.) +
During the six months Of darkness
in the Arctic regions can the Behring
Sea?
CThis is no case for an ordinary
physician. Send for Doc Cook.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
AXHAWKER JOTS

Anyway, thinks the Smith County
Pioneer, Armageddon would make
good name for a parlor car.
In an appeal to it's delinquent sub
scribers to pay up the osborne news
says: our creditors need the money.
Fashion note. in the Goodland Re
public: The fall suits don't promise 70
cover a multitude of sins, but they VIII
cover more ankle than last years SUITS
did.
AS the Bucklin Banner says: A gooo
doctor may understand his business an
right. but it takes farmer TO cure
pork
.ofr in the Bean" is the heading the
Raxter Springs News puts over an
item telling about a man VINO mas peer
taken into custody on an insanity
charge.
IT ia not much use for one to ex-
pect a heavenly abode in the worid TO
come. thinks the Spring Hill New Era,
unless he tries to put something VI
heaven into his earthly home.
From Editor Miller of the Bucklin
Banner; I was taught that it is money
that makes the mare CO., but L md d
good many old plugs trotting along the
business thoroughfare strictly on creolI'
Lincoln and Roosevelt compared oy
the Olathe Register: Lincoln began his
career by splitting rails, and RooSeVel.
ends his by splitting his party; out
that's about the only point OF resen-
blance.
A Arm of insurance agents at Mound
Valley advertises in the Mound Valley
Herald as follows: TAFT, wilson anu
Roosevelt all believe in writing your
insurance with home agents. But ike
Teddy, we think we are it. Let us write
it.
After a continued and careful per-
usaI of the Kansas weeklies, it is rea-
sonable to conclude that the biggest
and the sweetest peaches of the home
grown variety that the editors of thesS
papers have seen are the last ones pre-
sented to them by kind friends
A prose jingle from the Monet Times:
Two women started out to win man.
Each entered the race with different
plan. One put on fine garments TO
dazzle the eye, the other baked for
him an old-fashioned pie. The dresser
did nothing but giggle and talk; the
baker said nothing, but won in walk.
The village hackman at Seneca, who
says he never sleeps, has been see
ing things recently, and he Is
kind enough to call the attention OF
the good people of Seneca, through the
column of the Seneca Tribune. to the
fact that he never sleeps and that they
should govern themselves accordingly
The recent hot weather is hard on
setting hens, reports the Alma Signal,
and it explains; A SEDAN man went 10
a nest the other day where one hen
was setting and was amazed to find two
more big hens piled in the nest with
her. He thought it strange but went
away. He got to thinking about 1t
again and went back Two of the hens
were dead. They had been smothered
in the nest.
One on the editor of the LaCygne
Record, which he tells about as fol-
lows: A bunch of school girls came to
the Record office Tuesday evening to
buy some test paper and one of them
asked us if we'd got an item about
that horse that fell in the we'll. Hun
CRY for news we began probing for
particulars. and finally asked when the
accident occurred. IT don't know, ex-
actly," was the naive reply, about 25
or 30 years ago.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Do a man a favor and he'll expect
another one.
X
Many people insist on giving the
devil more than his due.
x = x
Men who want but little here below
seldom get that much.
4
No man is sufficiently famous 10
suit his tastes in that direction.
=
If you are proud of your memory
name over the last half-dozen vice
presidents.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

No wonder Colonel Roosevelt was
so handy at the throttle of a steam
engine where he worked out so sue
cessfully in Montana recently. He
perfected the first political steam
roller" that was operated in such con-
vincing fashion at the Republican ma
tional convention of 1908
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

IF'rom the New York Press
Usually the reason for a woman's
trusting a man is there isn't any.
There are more theories about rails
ing children than there are children.
For a photograph to be good of a
woman nobody must be able to recog-
nize it.
A woman's idea of big gambling is
taking chances on dressing against the
weather.
girl can do more damage with a
pair of eyes than a man can with a
pair of pistols.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Not a single advance notice of the
state fair was anything like an exag-
seration. In fact, few of them did If
justice. Hats off to Secretary Cook.
President Borman and all the other
officials of the fair association who
have labored with such signal sue
cess
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

will show lack of public spiritedness
that will be discouraging to the men
who have worked so hard and success
fully to make the fair what it is. And
everybody that goes to the lai- will
be sure to get his moneys worth, and
moro
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

to drive a motor, which in turn re-
wolves the screws. Usually there is a
loss of energy between the steam boil
er and the motor, and if that has been
avoided in the case of the Jupiter a
distinct advance in the application OF
electricity as a motive power has been
made.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

gub@a Gbers OF the state Journal
away frONn home during the summer
may haze the paper mailed regularly
each day TO any address at the rate OF
tan DENTS a week or thirty cents a
month (by wall only. Address
changed as often as desired. While
out of town the State journal wSH DO
tO you like a daily letter from homo.
Advance payment is requested ON
these short time subscriptions, TO save
hookkeeping eXDcnse9.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

As was to have been expected, a
vice ring of large proportions has
been unearthed in Chicago. 1t would
have been unusual, to say the least,
If the Windy City had permitted little
old New York to get ahead of it in
such a particular.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Neither is it at all likely thas the
Vicomte Benoist day, of France,
will be held in exceedingly high cs-
TEEN by the men of the United States.
The vicomte is enthusiastic over the
way the American women boss their
husbands. The truth, you know, is
ofttines pretty bitter to swallow
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Women who become active in poll
tics will have to change some of their
ways. A woman who had been APP
pointed to act as a clerk at a polling
place in California for the recent pri-
1naries was seven minutes late in get
ting on the job because she had to
stop at home to "frizz'' her hair.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

This disease that is moving down
the horses in Kansas in such frightfuI
fashion seems to be a good deal like
the chigger bite in some aspects
Everybody has a different remedy for
it and none Of them is effective.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

If it becomes necessary for the
United States to intervene in Mexico,
the presidential campaign will have a
difficult job to attract much attention.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Indiana, which has been unhappy
ever since the goldbrick men were
suppressed, can now cheer up. a per-
petua1 motion company has been or
ganized with a capital stock of $780,
0OO
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

There is one political certainty. No
matter how good or how poor show
ing Mr.. Debs makes on election 1ay.
he will be the next presidential can
didate of the Socialists, if his health
ia SsToa
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Spain may now proceed to regard
itself as lucky. According to experts
our naval gunnery is much better than
1t was at Santiago.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

What a puny thing Governor VIII
sons campaign fund must seem TIC
Colonel Roosevelt. To date it totals
only $4,000.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Eugene V. Debs is in for good
trouncing of the verbal variety. tie
charges Mr.. Roosevelt with Deing an
oppressor of labor
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Here's another jolt for the mother
in-law- After the wife, the husband
is the most important person in the
house" declares a London police mag
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

All the kings horses and all the
kings men couldn't keep the British
suffragettes from storming one of
King Georges summer castles the
other dav
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

1t is all right for the astronomers
to go to Rio de Janiero to see the total
eclipse of the sun on October 10. But
the politicians will wait at home for
the total eclipse that is coming No
zeu7bar =
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

Boys will be boys. Some Kansas
City lads are being accused of setting
fire to a school house so as to prolons
their vacation.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

All aboard for the state fair, It is
the greatest agricultural exposi-
ton that Kansas has ever seen.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
ON THE SPUR
OF THE MOMENT
BY ROY X. MOULTON

Now for a Good Rest
Mother and the girls are back
They've been down at the shois
Residing at the swell resort
They stayed three months OF noIe-
They went there to recupeTate
Because their health was pad
They wax quite eloquent about
The splendid time they had
or course, they are all tlreo out
And feel punk at the best
The fun they had was worth II
They'll now stay home and rest
When the BIuegiH Are a-Bitin.
When the bluegill are a-olun ana l'e
bait is in the can, "a. ,,;r
It is then the restless spirit gets IT'S grip
in on a man.
You kin have all of your brook trout anu
your bass fer all of me, 80
There is Just one kind of fishin' In ire
world that 1 kin see
I don't care for fancy tackle, just sooo
old bamboo pole,
And a hook and line to drop in some pro-
life fiShin' hole.
Now of all the sports a-goin', | consloer
To sit right there a-fishin' till the sun
can't always sometimes tell if I will
Most gen'aliy don't but that don't
trouble me mite.
You see, don't go for the fish so mucn
as for the chance
To lie down on the fragrant bank ara
view the vast expanse
Of heavens blue and see the clouds go
sailfn' by all day.
l kin get all the fish l want upon my
homeward way.
I pass right by butcher shop and my
wife doesn't know
A bluegill from sturgeon, so that's how
come TO go.
Something Coming.
GOSH us kids is awful good.
Now the lawn and lug in wood,
Pick the apples. pound the rugs,
Also pick potater bugs,
Run the errands every day,
In most abligin' way.
Never stop to question why;
Never stop to make reply;
Do exactly as we're told,
Don't give Ma a chance to scold.
Haven't spoken one cross word;
Not a spankin' has occurred
Round our place for most a week;
Sort of quiet, SO to speak.
Dad says us kids must be sick,
Wants to call a doctor, quick.
He can't see why were so good.
If he'd read the signs, he could.
Answers on most every fence,
Stuck regardless of expense.
If Dad fails to observe it,
We must jar his mind bit.
faint no snap to be straight laced
For two weeks. and solemn-faced
Workin mornin', noon and night.
Tell you what, it's sure fright.
Hope that we can just hold down
Till that circus comes to town.
Sisters Picture.
When sister gets her picture took
She looks just like a Gibson book;
She twists her features like she'd squalI,
And don't look like herself at all.
She wears more hair than e'er before
And gets 1t at the ten-cent store.
She tries to look just like a saint,
And that is what my sister amt.
She poses like an actOrine
Bout sixteen times or seventeen.
And frets and fumes like all possessed,
Although the artist does his best.
She sQuints and scowls and can't sit
straight
And makes the Teller wait and wait
I don't see what she does 1t fer,
The pictures never look like her
feel like yellin': Get the hooki''
When sister gets her picture took
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
FROM OTHER PENS
sYNDICALIsM DEFrcrs


Syndicalism seems to have had it's
run in England for the time being. Re-
ports OF the proceedings at the con-
gress of British trade unions now in
session agree with what observers on
the spot have said concerning the state
OF exhaustion to which the labor
unions IN that country have been re-
duced by the series of bitter strikes, of
Wntch the dock strike was the last
episode. In that series of general
strikes, the champions of syndicalism,
the beginning of the end of the pres
ent industrial regime. Labor had at
last Weakened to the consciousness of its
powers when exerted in mass. Hence
forth no mere petty local trade strikes.
One general strike after another was
to bring the economic life of the ma
ton to Standstill and the capitalist
class to it's knees. But events have
shown what events on the continent
had shown before, and what the astute
Socfal-Demo eratic leaders in Germany
have recognized: that the general
strike means playing with fire. I'm
less those who initiate a general strike
are prepared to go to the point of
actual revolution, it can only spell
failure In Russia, in the fall of 1905,
a general strike forced the car to
grant a constitution; but it was a
strike in which the entire nation, ir-
respective of class, participated. The
nation could not repeat the effort:
when the revolutionisrs proclaimed a
the same year, the attempt not only
proved failure, but brought about
the loss of much that had been gained
in the first assault. 1t is the theory of
the Syndtcalfst leaders that the general
strike educates the working class for
revolution, and that by dint of re-
peated attempts they will some day
bring off a strike that will turn into a
revolution. But what is much more
apparent is that every unsuccessful
general strike leaves behind It a dis
couraged and disorganized mass, and
paves the way to reaction.-New York
Evening Post.
DREAMS AND THEIR VALUE.
Every dream, especially every day
dream, has its value. The gigantic
enterprises that now cover the land
had their beginning in dreams of one
kind or another. Fulton dreamed the
transatlantic liner into existence, and
Morse dreamed the telegraph. Bell
dreamed of sending his voice through
a wire for thousands of miles, and the
Wrights dreamed of conquering the
air. The great achievements of the
earth were originally stuff that dreams
are made of and nothing more. so
when you gee your boy day-dreaming
on the grass or at the window, do not
check him Let him send his little
mind into the future and some day
from the weird dream he may crente
4 lever to move the world.-New York
American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The state Journal Is a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
rNs1fxaticn for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka
The news Is received in The State Jour-
nal building over wires for this sole puT-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
KANSAS COAMENT
OPEN WAR IMMINENT,


open strife is threatened in En-
Poria between the Mothers Of the old
School, and the Mammals of the New
Sehooi' The latter. fortified by the
, ,dIest works of Scientific Research
DeleNe that when Baby cries, it is
merely an error of the spirit. though
the young one-left alone in his era
dle-may howl for hours. The Nam
mas also scorn the old-fashioned and
clearly unscientihc idea that Baby
must be fed whenever he sounds his
hungry-time squawk. They aver, and
back 1t up most cuttingly with whole
pages from ponderous tones of high
proved authorities, that three times
a Gay IS enough for any Child. Begin
TO humor him now their argument
goes by feeding in between meal times
or during the night, and you SOW the
seeds OF self-will and Instruction.
Such doctrine is rankest heresy in the
minds OF the Mothers of the Old School.
Ihelr mothers taught them, havinE
learned it from mothers in the past
clear back to Eve. that Babies were
made solely to cuddle when they cry,
ana TO be Struggled smack I'D against
the lunch counter at the slightest
whimper for refreshments day or
night. The Mothers stand pat on the
doctrine that any amount of warm,
coy wuzzling will not hurt the will
power of any tiny baby and point
to the hundreds of thousands of babies
of the past to prove it. Beyond that,
it arouses fierce indignation in them,
when they must listen to the offspring
of the Mammas crying for hours in
loneliness and hungriness. The Mothers
first impulse was to avoid the Mammals
who adhere to such heretical practices,
and to refuse to "eat at their houses"
Now sterner measures are advocated,
and the Gazette expects any day to
hear of a rescue party of wild-eyed
Mothers sWOODinR down on soma moor
bewildered Mamma, and lock her in the
coal cellar, while they administer
tenderly and appetizingly to the little
kicker, who has yowled for hours over
some strange unaccountable longing
in his belly.-Emporia Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10

II Topekans are not most liberal in
their patronage of the state fair they
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-10
CLOSED SEASONS.

Down in Oklahoma the hunters may
Kill prairie chickens now, and may con-
tnue the sport for two months. In Kan
sas they can not be killed until the first
OF October, and then only during that
month. Kansas sportsmen have to con-
fine themselves to fifteen days for kill
ing quail, while in Oklahoma they may
he killed from November Is to Febru-
airy 1. The closed season for quail In
Kansas haS not been followed by the
increase that was predicted. There are
no more quail in the state now than
there We're, when we practically had no
ciCsed season. 1t was one of those pet
theories which did not work out in
practice.-Lawrence Gazette.