The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1912-03-08
SHOULD THEY WEAR "RATSg'
"She Don't Have to Wear No Rats in
Her Hair.9

Home Comfort
l am only too glad to express my
opinion on the subject Of false hair and
"rats." The women who put their mat
tresses on their cocoanuts, are about
on a par with, that is my humble way
of thinking, the South Sea Islander
and the Zulu, who put rings through
their noses, and make their hair
stand up straight, like bunch OF
miniature telegraph poles. We can un-
derstand savages doing these things,
because they don't know any better,
but civilized women do know better,
and they ought to have more sense
than to put bunch of horse hair ana
dead Chinamen's pigtalls On their
heads which God Almighty never in
tended for any such barbaric defile-
ment. A woman's head is supposed to
be the seat of her intelligence, he.
! brain; and nature has, in the major
ity of cases, made that head beautiful,
and covered it with hair, which is, as
a rule, woman's crowning glory. Why
anv sane woman should want to stuff a
lot of pigs hair, frogs wool, horses
| whiskers and dead Chinamen's plgtalls
on the top Of her head, Heaven above
knows, for 1 don't. 70 contemplate
woman with her head as big as a
bushe1 basket at night, and then see
her crawling down to breakfast next
morning with Uranium as big as a
Boston bean, is certainly enough to
give me the palpitation Of the liver
pad A lady informs me that she has
to wear puffs because big hats are in
style. That is all rot for know two
or three young ladies with sense and.
character, who have never worn
rats or puffs, and who would not, ur-
der any circumstances put any mat
tresses on their heads. These girls
have small hats, hats that are Infinite
" more becoming than those enormous
contraptions that are anchored with
pn,ntv steen yard long pins, daggers,
harpoons, skewers, swords or what
ever you lige to call them to heads up
bolstered with mountainous masses OF
hogs wool and horses feathers.
was Informed the other day that one
had better be dead than out of style.
I replied to the lady who told me that'
that she had better be dead than ID
style. She sat down in a chair at the
foot of my bed, distracted a harpoon
from her bewhiskered Chinese grave
ward, and placed her hat, which was
as big as a circus tent, with a sign
of satisfaction, on my lounge. AS she
talked the sun streamed in through the
window onto that mountain of puf1s
and rats. on which the wind had blown
all the dust of the streets, for by the
wav it was windy day. In the sun
light I could see Billy Microbe and
Jimmy Germ playing tag on the pigs
wool and horses feathers that sur
mounted what God Almighty intended
to he an intelligent head. Either IN
taking off her hat or in buffetlng the
fierce gales out of doors, her Plkes
Peak of puffs and rats had Topped
over about three yards to the star
board, and I expected every moment
TO see. the whole fuzzy, wuzzy, mlcrooy
mass of horse hair and pigs WOOL hop
with a crash on to floor of my chicken
COOP. Thank heaven the horrible mass
held on, until finally the lady departed
to nv intense JOY, and took her mic
robv heathenish head furniture with
her. Now, girls cut out the rats and
puffs. Your head never looks prettier
than when adorned solely with your
own hoir For co4's sake he natural.
Re yourselves. 10 YOU know that
there is a, terrible plague raging in