The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-02-19
Tests Of :
nendshiip

pltS, AHiS 10 SuIl GIL OufIuua anu
cheap cynicism, 1t has been expressed
In So many tongues. has SO often been
crystallized into proverbs or fables the
world over, that 1t hardly seems worth
repeating. But one notable thing Is
usually overlooked 1t does not
apply to friendship at all. II applies
only to limitations OF friendship.
1t Is the very nature Of true friend.s
ship TO thrive best In an atmosphere
OF trouble. Assuming that We are sim
cere. we all know that we are never
drawn so closely to friend az when
he Is In difficulties and needs us. It is
easy to be his friend then, because
that is just the condition that friend
ship loves; 1t is far more difficult TO
be his friend when he is prosperous
and seems to have no need OF us.
1t may seem that this friendship In
adversely Is very noble thing; Ger
ftainly there may be much sbeauty.
much tender@seltsacrifoe and loving
service in its manifestation. But let
| US not fiatter ourselves too easily.$s
/ The trouble Of d friend makes Its
| appeal to our vanity; we feel that We
! are needed, and this is always a graft
, fying knowledge, we feel that we are
OF Importance and that is ever pleas
ure, to, our self-esteem. But when
everything is well with our friend, APP
parently he has what he wants and
Ia Independent OF us, Naturally, that
IL a time when shams OF friendship
flourish, for their aim Is to get and not
/ to give; true friendships aim is TO
get by giving.
or course the difference In our
I friends condition Is really only super
| fetal; he truly needs our friendship al
| ways, as much In prosperity as in trou-
BILE But We are disconnected by APP
pearances, II we ever draw away from
In the sunshine, not when the clouds
are around him. His prosperity may
ALLEVIATE US. his trouble calls us back
| to him. And this fact should cause
us very limited pride. Our attitude
In his prosperity is the real test.
We may therefore say that a mans
prosperity Is the greatest trial OF his
friends-that Is, OF his true friends
/ II ought to be true that friendship
shares the joys as we'll as the sorrows
of life, but in the case of the Joys the
sharing Is more difficult. 1t is not DIFF.
flcult to go about seeking pleasure to-
gether, to travel, to have good time
together; II is not difficult to share
each others love Of art or music or
literature or science. Comradeship In
these things may become very close,
very stimulating and satisfying; but
mere comradeshlp, good fellowship is
not quite enough for friendship
| Can we be truly glad when our
friend is doing better than we are
in any one of these pursuits, when he
succeeds, while, perhaps. We are do
ing poorly. when he wins applause
that Is denied us? Is it not easy to
think that his success is a little be-
yond measure and ours Ia little be-
low? Or IL fortune comes to him as II
has never come to us; II riches are
poured into his hands, 30 that he can
gain whatever money will purchase
| and do whatever. he has "a mind To:
is It then SO easy to remain his loyal
and devoted friend. assuming that we
Fare far above any desire to sponge
upon his wealth. Can we bring our.
selves, in proper spirit, to accept bis
help instead of having the proud Joy
Of giving help? Are we not liable to
! imagine an air OF superiority in him
| Our very self.respect renders us sem
sitiye, quick to be hurt. apt to imagine
that his prosperity has changed on,
friend for the worst. 1t may be pos.
sible that It has; which proves that be
never needed our friendship more. Fol
prosperity Is the supreme test OF 20
man, because its tendency is to ener
vate and weaken; adversely rouses
and rallies all that Is strongest In US
selfshly, we like our friend to be
worse of than we ares to be In need
of our better natures. The good things
cling to US: 1t is merely q peryersior
of our better natures. The good things
In us may SO easily be wrongly EN-
| ployed. The true friendship, because
the more unselfsh, may be shown
when our friend does not appear e
4 need us, when no can give to us rath
| er than we to him. 1t is not Away
more blessed to give than to receive,
sometimes the position Is reversed
Besides which there are more ways so
giving than one, and the prosperous
friend may really be In sore want o.
our sympathy, our tender affection apt
counsel; he may also long for our &C
ceptance OF that which 1t will be
joy to him to expend upon US. IL
lgIvs nobly is a very fine thing; It u
an equally fne thing to accept nobly
!, f., 1t Is easy to be true to our friend
when he is in trouble, when he Il
down, when others fly from him, whet
others despise and neglect him. Thi
I response TO- such call Is one O.
friendships deepest Joys. But In times
!, when we can do. nothing for him
when he makes no claim upon US