Bisbee daily review., 1912-11-01
The Peeved
 Bill Clerk

 house." said the bill clerk, as he dex- terously trundled his stool into posi- kion and perehed himself His name Is Timothy Hsyseed. and he's from Squash Center He'd have stayed there. but the COWS were always mis- taking him for something to eat and he got bitten up quite badly"
 How interesting" remarked the cashier. "A very odd name, isn't it7"
 Well, I won't say that's his sure enough name" the bill clerk kindly explained. But it ought to be. He's the worst jay you ever saw. He's got freckles all over his nose snd-here's the Joke:
 At breakfast he asked the landlady for another plate of cakes. Honesti And when she asked him if he would. mt like anything more-sarcastic, you know-he says, I believe I'll have an other piece Of steak. please Just that way, And he'd jabbed two pieces when the dish went around He's looking for a job. I think we ought to make room for him here"
 "Did the cid lady throw the coffee pot at his head?" asked the cashier.
 ~she ought to have" replied the bill clerk, with a grin. 'Ifs a wonder she didn't"
 "She didn't then7"
 "of course. she didn't" said the bir clerk.
 You don't mean to say that he got his plate of cakes and his steak" de manded the cashier Surely not?"
 "of course, he did" answered the bill clerk. Did you suppose she'd tell him he'd had all she could afford to give him? What kind of a joint do you think 1t is?
 Well, well" said the cashier. "Nc doubt 1t would be rather remarkable if the good woman objected to supply ing more food than this rustic per son paid for"
 "Oh, I guesS he didn't get any more than he paid for. if you come to that said the bill clerk.
 The strange thing was that the young man should ask for what he wanted then?" queried the cashier "Is that 1t, Johnny?"
 If you knew the old lady. you'6 think 1t was" said the bill clerk.
 And he got the cakes-and the steak" said the cashier. He certain ly must be a blockhead. IT he'd kept still he'd have had the pleasure Of leaving the table hungry, in al probability.
 Its to be hoped he will learn; fl he doesn't, it's hard to predict what will become Of him. .. ....-. ITO begin with, he'll go around ask ing for a job, I suppose, and he1 keep on asking until he gets it, in. stead of politely waiting for the jot 10 come to him. It's quite evident that he hasn't any delicacy whatever Think of a young man-with Ireckles on his nose, too!-asking busy people to give him work, just because he happens to want it. Shameful"
 Well, if you think it's all right tc put your feet in the trough, you can, muJteEed the Dlll CleTh-
 I'm not sure that 1t isn't all right if you happen to be a hog and your associates are hogglsh," said the cash fer.
 I'm not casting any reflections or your boarding house" he continued q merely want to call your attention to the fact that this is a cold, cruel world. It isn't enough to look hun gry; you've got to holler for grub and that in no uncertain tone. 1T you do that it's a hundred to one that you'll get it."
 Your friend, Mir. Timothy Hayseed is making a pretty good beginning. il you ask me. When he gets his job he'll ask about anything he wants to know and then he'll ask for a raise of salary"
 That's all the good it would do him if he worked here" remarked the bill clerk.
 You can't ever until you try" said the cashier. After he's got most of the knowledge regarding the busi- ness" he continued, he'll ask for a partnership, and he'H naturally get that
 @Tn course of time he'll ask the other members of the firm to retire, and they will gracefully skidoo If they don't, he'll scoop in majority of the stock and kick 'em out.
 Having accomplished this. he'll ask the principal firms in the same line Of business to consolidate with him and allow him to direct their destiniss. and they will do 80.
 Then he will consider that his in. dustry Is entitled tO a little special legislation of the fostering order, and he wif ask for t. If he can put up the right kind of an argument to the commission. he'll get what he asks for"
 Put up is good" commented the bill clerk. "SO all you've got to do to be the head of a trust Is to ask for another plate of buekwheat cakes when you are a young man. Is that lt?"
 You're putting it the wrong way, Johnny" answered the cashier. Not