davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18

the Curre-.t news OF the day. II mentioned by the
newspapers it is because it can be utilized as the basis
of humorous story or fippant paragraph.
The late Senator Hanna once introduced by re-
quest bill that not prepared by Bug, but by a
with practical idea. The bill provided for the
removal of negroes to Africa by the general Govern
ment and regarded genuine freak bill.
Later it developed that the words by request meant
nothing thousands of negroes who made to be-
lieve that the great and powerful friend OF President
Mckinley in earnest and that he intended to help
them to migrate The sharpers used the bill to induce
the negroes subscribe to preliminary fund for begin
ming the movement the negroes having been told that
only such subscribers could enjoy the benefits OF the
bill. The bill caused the Ohio Senator much trouble,
and he eventually compelled to repudate it in the
Senate.
THE National Highway Bug of the most persist
ent of his kind; but he is not distinct personality
There many of him, and he has numerous highway
projects Representative Hamil of New Jersey had a
peck of trouble account of bill prepared by high
way Bug that was slipped into Congress bearing the
New Jersey mans He repudiated the measure
the floor of the House. 1t did not even have the
words @by request it. The method OF introducing
bills in the House is to drop them into basket on the
clerks desk. Many bills thus deposited before the
House is actually in session, and it is supposed that
Highway Bug took advantage of this condi-
+;o,, .,,+ro l:cI II e. h.u1,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18
BY ARTHUR WALLACE DUNN

surveys for seven national
highways from Washing
ton, d. c., to Portland,
Maine, to Niagara Falls,
New York, to Seattle, to
San Francisco, to Los An
geles, to Austin, Texas, and
to Miami, Florida, each
taking in the principal in
termediate cities along the
route. Other bills for great
national highways have
been proposed, and it is
apparent that the High
way Bug is not only per
sistent but numerous.
One of the most practical
of good roads men once had
an opportunity to talk his
favorite topic to President
Taft. He received assur-
ances of the Presidents
hearty interest in the good
roads movement, coupled
with the statement that
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18

penetrate the strongest steel
clad ship; an armor that will
resist any shell that may be
fired against it; a gun that
will wing any flying machine;
an explosive that will destroy
the strongest fertilization,
each and every one has its
earnest Bug advocate. This
particular Bug is not confined
to any special field. He ap-
pears at the War Department,
the Navy Department, and
haunts the committees of Con-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18

army engineers had been constructing roads about
q the Capital that would working models
Y for States and communities. The visitor told the
President that the roads he referred to of
practical value; that the engineers knew little
nothing about road building. The interview
to abrupt conclusion, the President
evidently considering enormously, it happened
that his caller merely one of the Highway Bugs
When Jacob s. Coxey some eighteen years ago pro-
posed to have five hundred million dollars of Government
bonds issued to aid in the construction of highways and
give work to the unemployed, he Highway Bug
though, | recollect, the harsher word Crank"
otter applied to him in those days.
But the Highway Bug is making progress. Men who
would have found innumerable constitutional objec-
tons to the expenditure of federal money roads
few years ago have become champions of the move
ment, and bills seriously considered to appropriate
money for the improvement of roads that have been
tablshed rural mail and which rural de-
livery carriers travel.
INVENTORS of war materials furnish large quota of
the 3bug family ever present in Washington. wire
wound gun that will not burst with the heaviest charge
of high explosive; armor-percng shell that will
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18

but dreams. Such bills are introduced
with the words @by request in paren-
theses after the name of the Senator or
Representative introducing them. These
words mean that the member of Congress
does not indorse the measure, that he
introduces it to accommodate some per-
son who had prepared it; and generally,
a aby request" bill is never considered by
n commit fec nor does If receive notice in
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-08-18

AS various bugs and insects
~ are attracted to a brilliant
light, SO are human
@bugs' attracted to Washington.
The term 3bug" has been applied
to many persons instead of the
word crank" which seems harsh
and might imply that the person
so designated was not only a
nuisance, but possibly off his
mental balance. Far be it from
me to criticize the Bug! The
Bug of today may be the great
inventor of tomorrow. There is
a long list of once seeming cranks
whose names now adorn the halls
of fame. Morse of the telegraph,
Bell of the telephone, Langley of
the flying machine, Mergenthaler
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
RED TAPE RULES IN LONDON
Man Who Fell into the Thames Re.
fused Admittanee to Police Sta
lions and Hospital.

The complaints made occasionally
In New York of the refusal OF hos
pitfalls to admit e 'gency patients,
some of them in desperate plight, are
brought to mind by the experience of
a London man who fell into the
Thames the other day.
In New York the explanation has
been that the hospitals refusing to
treat patients were overcrowded and
1t was impossible to accommodate an
other applicant for admission. In the
London case red tape appears to have
been responsible for the denial of sue
o to the mar who took an involun-
tary bath in the Icy waters of the
river.
Nothing In the testimony on the
subject Of the shivering unfortunate's
treatment indicated that there was
not plenty of room for him in which
to get warm and dry his clothes.
The story came out in a police
court, when a young laborer was
charged with breaking a plate glass
window in the Salvation army shelter
in Whitechapel road. The accused
testified hat after he pulled himself
out of the river he had applied at
two police stations for permission to
have his clothes dried, and was re-
ferred to the casual ward of a hos
pital, but an official there would not
admit him because he had no order.
1t was then early on a December
morning. According to the testimony
of a night Waterman at the Salvation
army shelter, the prisoner had asked
to be admitted there about four
o'clock a. m. to dry his clothes.
When the Waterman told him to
call again at five o'clock, as 1t was
against the rules to admit anyone be-
fore that hour, the prisoner threw his
cap at the window and broke the
glass.
The magistrate was interested in
the prisoners story that he had been
turned away from police station and a
hospital, and declined to dispose OF
the case until he ascertained whether
1t was true.
Another tale Of red tape methods In
a London hospital is told by an Ameri
can. He suffered an injury to his eye
and was in great pain.
Can you afford to pay for the
treatment" asked the surgeon at the
hospital.
"Oh, yes" responded the American
Then we can do nothing for you
said the surgeon. I'VE treat only
those who cannot afford to pay."-N
Y. Sun.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
PAINFUL FINGER NAILS CURED

81 have suffered from the same
trouble painful finger nails) at differ
ent periods of my life. The first time
Of its occurrence, perhaps twenty-five
years ago, after trying home remedies
without getting helped, l asked my
doctor to prescribe for me, but 1t vas
not for a year or more that my nails
and fingers were well. The in1amma-
ton and s%uppuration began at the base
of the finger nail. Sometimes 1t was
SO painful that l had to use a poultice
to induce suppuration. After the pus
was discharged the swelling would go
down until the next period of inflam-
nation, possibly not more than a week
or two afterwards. These frequent in
Examinations resulted in the loss Of the
nail.
Perhaps ten years later, I began
again to suffer from the same trouble.
Again l tried various remedies, among
them a prescription from a doctor of
a friend of mine, who had suffered
from a like trouble. This seemed to
u6Ip bOui6W udl lOI d llulS, OuG 1t Wo5
not a permanent cure; next, tried a
prescription from my own doctor, but
this was so irritating to the sensitive,
diseased skin that I could not use it.
! began to use Cuticura Soap and
Ointment. I had used the Cuticura
Ointment previously On my children's
scalps with good effect. I did not use
the Soap exclusively, but I rubbed the
Cuticura Ointment into the base of the
nail every night thoroughly, and as
often beside as l could. l had not used
it but a few weeks before my nails
were better, and in a short time they
were apparently we'll. There was
no more su%ppuration, nor infamma-
ton, the nails grew out clean again.
One box Of Cuticura Ointment was all
that l used in efecting a cure.
(Signed) Mrs. I. ]. Horton, Katonah.
N. Y, Apr. 10, 1910. On Sept. 81, Mrs.
Horton wrote: 81 have had no further
return OF the trouble with my finger
nails" Although Cuticura Soap and
Ointment are sold everywhere, a sam
| pie of each, with 32-page book, will be
mailed free on application to "Cuti-
cura," Dept. L. Boston.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
John Smith E-xerywhere.

The good old name Of John Smith
does not suggest in English any great
degree of aristocracy. but transferred
to other languages it seems to climb
the ladder, so to speak.
Thus. in Latin it is Johannes
Smithus, the Italian smooths it off In
to Giovanni Smith, the Spaniards rem
der it Juan Smithus, the Dutchman
adopts it as Hans Schmidt, the French
f1atten it out into Jean Smeet and the
Russian says Jonloff Smittowski.
When John Smith gets into the tea
trade in Canton he becomes Jovan
Shimmit; If he chambers about Mount
Hecla the Icelanders refer to him as
Jaime Smithson; If he trades among
the Tuscaroras he becomes Ton Ga
Suittia; in Poland he is known as
Ivan Schmittiweiski; should be wan
der among the Welsh mountains they
talk of Jihon Schmidt; when he goes
to Mexico he is called Jontli FSmitti;
if of classic turn he fingers among
Greek ruins he turns to Ion Smikton,
and in Turkey he is utterly disguised
as Voc Sect.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
THE DOCTOR HABIT
And How She Overcame Il.

When well selected food has helped
the honest physician place his patient
in sturdy health and free from the
doctor habit" it is a source of salts
faction to all parties. A Chicago wom-
an says:
I'VE have not had a doctor In the
house during all the 5 years that we
have been using Grape-Nuts food. Be-
fore we began, however, we had the
doctor habit and scarcely a week went
by without a call on our physician.
When u youngest boy arrived, 5
years ago, was very much run down
and nervous. suffering from indiges-
ton and almost continuous headaches.
l was not able to attend to my ordinary
domestic duties and was SO nervous
that l could scarcely control myself.
Under advice I took to Grape-Nuts.
Il I'M now, and have been ever since
we began to use Grape-Nuts food, able
to do all my W work. The dyspep-
STA, headaches, nervousness and rheu-
matism which used to drive me fairly
wild, have entirely disappeared.
my husband finds that in the night
work in which he is engaged, Grape
Nuts food supplies him the most whole.
some. Strengthening and satisfying
lunch he ever took with him." Name
given by Postum Co.. Battle Creek.
Mich.
Read the little book, "The Road to
MELVILLE" in pkgs. There's a reason"
Ever read the above letter. A new
eae appears from time to time. They
are geaufae, true, and full OF human
interest.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
FLAX GROWING
is PROFITABLE
WESTERN CANADA FARMERS BE.
COMING RICH IN ITS
PRODUCTION.

So much has been written regarding
the great amount of money made out
of growing wheat in the prairie prov
inces of Manitoba, Saskatchewan and
Alberta, Western Canada, that many
other products Of the farms are over
looked. These provinces will always
grow large areas Of wheat-both
spring and winter-and the yields will
continue to be large, and the general
average greater than in any other
portion of the continent. Twenty, thir-
ty, forty, and as high as fifty bushels
per acre Of wheat to the acre-yields
unusual in other parts Of the wheat
growing portions Of the continent
have attracted worldwide attention,
but what Of oats, which yield forty,
fifty and as high as one hundred and
ten bushels per acre and carry off the
worlds prize, which, by the way, was
also done by wheat raised in Sas-
~katchewan during last November at
the New York Land Show. And then,
there is the barley. with it's big yields,
and its excellent samples. Another
money-maker, and a big one is fax.
The growing of fax IS extensively car
ried on in Western Canada. The
writer has before him a circular is
sued by a prominent farmer at Saska-
toon. The circular deals with the
treatment Of seed fax, the seeding
and harvesting, and attributes yields
Of less than 20 bushels per acre, to
later seeding, imperfect and iily-pre-
pared seed. He sowed twenty-five
pounds Of seed per acre and had a
yield of Twenty-Five bushels per acre.
This will probably dispose of at $3.50
per acre. Speaking Of proper prepa-
ration Of seed and cultivation Of soil
and %opportune sowing, in the circular
spoken of there is cited the case of a
Mr.. White, living fourteen miles
south of Rosetown, who had fifteen
acres Of summer fallow a year ago
last summer, upon which he produced
thirty-three bushels to the acre, when
many in the district harvested for
want of crop. Now, there can be no
proper reason advanced why such a
crop should not have been produced
on all the lands Of the anne quality
in the adjacent district, provided they
had been worked and cared for In the
same manner This year (1911) the
same man had one hundred acres Of
summer fallow. had something over
$500 bushels of wheat. He Also had
1900 bushels Of oats and 300 bushels
of flax"
There are the cattle, the horses, the
roots and the vegetable products of
Western Canada farms, all of which
individually and collectively deserve
special mention, and they are treated
of in the literature sent out on appli'
cation by the Government agents.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
II-Paid Herr

Mr.. French Strother, writing in the
Worlds Work about c. P. Rodgers
transcontinental flight. says that
financially the trip was a disappoint-
ment. He received five dollars a mile
for his flight from New York to Fort
Worth. and from Fort Worth to Pas
sadena, four dollars a mile and all the
purses he could arrange for on the
side. He thus received about twenty
thousand dollars from his hackers and
about three or four thousand dollars
prize money. But his machine cost
five thousand dollars and repairs cost
about seventeen thousand dollars
more, so his net return was small.
But he unconsciously summed up
the significance of his fight at Pasa-
dena, after he had heard the last con-
gratulations and had laid off the
American flag they had thrown across
his shoulders, when he placed his
hands on his mothers shoulder and
said:
Never mind about the money. 1t
don't amount to much that way-but
l did it, didn't II"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23

Sermons on the prevention Of CON
sumption will be preached in thou
sands Of churches on April %, which
the National Association for the Study
and Prevention of tuberculosis has set
aside as tuberculosis day. Last year
out of 200, 900 churches in the United
States, over $4,000 observed Tuberculo-
sis day, and millions Of churchgoers
were told about this disease from the
pulpit. This year will be the third
observation of tuberculosis day. Plans
are being made to have the gospel of
health preached more widely than
eve before. The movement will be
pushed through the 600 anti-tubercu-
losis associations allied with the ma
tional association and through the
boards of health, women's clubs and
other organizations In hundreds Of
cities and towns throughout the coun-
try. Through these various bodies
the churches will be reached and in
terested in the tuberculosis campaign.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
BoATMAN HAD HIS OWN IDEA
A good story of Irish repartee has
CIT Excellent Sample of Real
Irish Wit.

A good story II Irish repartee has
been published concerning John
Bright. He vas always ready for sal
mon-fshing, and on several occasions
went to Ireland with Mr. George Pea
body, the American philanthropist.
One day Mr.. Bright, noticing a po-
l1ceman on the bank, inquired of him
what sum the boatmen were entitled
to ask for rowing up the Shannon on
a days fishing. He said that from
seven shillings and sixpence to ten
shillings was the usual payment.
Mr.. Bright said to Mr.. Peabody:
Have you three half-crowns? l have
no change"
Mr.. Peabody produced the money
and gave it to the boatman. He was
dissatisfied, and said:
And is that all ye're giving me?'
That is ALL replied Mr.. Peabody.
well, that bates all liver heard"
answered the boatman. AN they
call We Paybody. Faith, I should call
ye Pay-nobody!"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
Visionary Men Only Practical Ones

Visionary Men Only Practical Ones?
John D. Rockefeller preached a
short sermon in the Fifth Avenue
Baptist church a few days ago, says
the New York Sun. His hearer was
Rev. R. J. Campbell, pastor of City
Temple. London. Mr.. Rockefeller
stood in the aisle and said to Mr.,
Campbell, who had just preached on a
passage from a poem in Deuteronomy
about the eagle and her treatment
of her young:
How strange that the press of this
country prints ordinary news and
fails to catch higher inspiration and
deal oftener with loftier ideals. l
liked exceedingly, Mr.. Campbell, your
application of old lessons to modern
conditions. Seems to me we must
realize these conditions. There must
come a revolution, a reformation at
any rate, from ideals of today. I
commend the mystic note in all you
said. We must reckon with that"
The preacher had said that the
~so-called practical man, who wants to
manage everything on a practical
basis, a business standard, is the
most impractical of all men. The
really practical man is the visionary.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
Medical Genius.

An old doctor, seeing a young one
who was going along the street with
half a dozen shabby-looking men and
women, called him aside and asked:
who are all those people, and
where are you going with them?"
81 will tell you in confidence" was
the reply, that I've hired them to
come and sit in my reception room. l
expect a rich patient this morning,
and | want to make an impression on
him."-Judge's Library.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
AIwaya Lean Year

TITS leap year every year in Papua,"
said an enthnologist. "The reason isn't
that the women are the bosses there.
No, quite the contrary. The reason
Is that love-making is supposed to be
a thing beneath the notice Of the Pa
puan male.
"All women look alike to him. So
the matrimonial pourparlors all fall
on the female sex.
"If a man accepts a girls proposal,
the fact that he is engaged is chalked
on his back. But on the girls back
the engagement is branded with a red
hot iron"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
Ladies' Diplomat.

Miss Lillian Russell, more beautiful
than ever, was serving tea at the Pro-
fessional Woman's League bazar at
The Waldorf-Astoria- A member of
the Spanish legation passed with two
charming girls, and Miss Russell said:
mo wonder that young man is so
popular with the ladies'. He is a Ia
dies diplomat"
How a ladies' diplomat?" a COM
poser asked.
Well" explained Miss Russell, "he
is the sort of chap who always remem-
bers a woman's birthday and forgets
her age"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
JIM CROW IN NORTHERN School
Parent Demand Separate Buildings
for White and Neoro CniIdren

Chlcago.-Jim Crow regulations for
the school of Hyde Park were de.
handed by a unanimous vote of the
Hyde Park Protective Improvement
Association. The request is said to
have grown out of the placing of ne
gro teacher over white children and
the inequality which allows wealthy
Hyde Park residents to send their
children to private schools and com
2els their neighbors to do otherwise,
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
pomestlc piffcuItles.

Observation-Disclosures the mater, dear?
Why do you look so worried?
Wife-Oh, I've just got everything
all ready for Mrs. Neatleigh's visit.
I've done up all the curtains and
pillow shams and bureau overs and
centerpieces, and they're all spick and
span.
Husband-Well, If everything is IN
such apple pie order why look so dis
consulate about it?
Wife bursting into tears)-Oh,
Just know, as soon as she sees them,
she'll know l cleaned everything all up
because she was coming!-Judge.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
"MoNA LISA" TO REAPPEAR.
Noted Paris Paper Says II Was Never
Stolen, but DAMAGED NV Misb.,

dSU W WTbFTdPs
Paris. = ILLUSTRATION says that
Leonardo Ola Vinci's Mona Lisa"
which was stolen from the Louvre
some months ago, will reappear short
~. 1t repeats the story printed on Oc-
tooer Z, 1911, to the effect that the
picture was never stolen but was re-
moved by a photographer who had
damaged it by allowing a ladder to
lah against it and was SCI badly fright
ened that he took it awdy.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
WOMAN FOR SUPREME COURT.
Feminine Members of Massachusetts
Bar lndorse Candidacy.

Boston.-The first woman to sit on
the United States Supreme Court
bench will be Mrs. Ellen Spencer-Mas-
sey, vice-president general of the Am
erican Federation of Woman's Clubs
and dean of the Washington School of
Law. if the indorsemen emit of a number
of Boston's women lawyers will &C.
complish anything. Six women prac-
s~itioners at the bar favor candidacy.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
CHURCH STARTED ON 81 CENTS.
Gift of Little Girl Grows Into Edifiee
COSTING S1O5,O

Philadelphia childish bequest of
81 cents, made in 1895 by Ethel Shin
gle just before her death, found it's
goal when the handsome Methodist
Episcopal Church of the Advocate,
costing $105, 900, was dedicated in Ger
mantown. The little girls gift was the
beginning of a movement to raise the
money necessary to construct the new
edifce, which was named the Ethel
Memorial.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
When Your Ewes Need Care

Try Murine Eye Remedy. Nc smarting-FeeIs
Fine-Acts Quickly. Try 1t for Red, Weak,
Watery Eyes and Granulated Eyelids. Illus
compounded by our Oculists-not a "Patent Med
icine"-b but used in successful Physicians Prac-
tice for many years. Now dedicated to the Pub
io and sold By Druggists at 25c and Soc per Bottle.
Murine Rye salve In Aseptic Tubes, 2c and Soc.
Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
Feasibility EXPLAINED,

isn't your husband getting a fear
fully bad disposition? 2" asked Mrs,
Shortsoot. n
NO. replied Mrs. Leedout. "He
has read somewhere that brainy men
are always cranks and he's trying to
get a reputation"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23

Women are now making great
strides" remarked Mrs. Birmingham
ners.
YES" replied the husband; "only
you can't notice 1t when you see one
of 'em in a hobble skirt going after
4 street car"
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23

without benefit, I began taking Doan's
Kidney Pills and soon received relief.
Continued use cured me. / believe
Doan's Kidney Pills saved my life"
when Your Back Is Lame, Remem-
Der the Name-DOAN'S. SOC. all stores.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
Touch Preventer.

Howell-Why do you call your dog
Strike Breaker?"
POWELL have done It ever since
he grabbed a fellow who was about
to strike me for money.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
IF THE Cold HANGS ON
Take Father John's B

IaNe FaIHeI WHITE "VUTNTIV
Long standing colds lead to serious
throat and lung troubles. bronchitis,
asthma and catarrh. Father Johns
Medicine gives prompt and complete
relief.
The Penn's Grove record., 1912-02-23
unseIfish Wisdom Demanded.

"A man should attend strictly to his
own business"
Maybe SO. But that policy would
never enable him to cut much of a
figure in the state legislature"