The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1912-10-31
THE MAN WHO
WAS PEART
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1912, by Associated Lit
erary Press.

The old pOSSum hunter of the Ten
nessee mountains was sixty years old,
but was so strong and hale and hearty
that / knew he must have been a won
derfully tough man in his younger
days. l tried several times to draw
him out, and one evening as we sat
smoking. with his good wife on the
other side Of the fireplace. he began:
When got married thought was
jest the peartest thing on the face of
the airth. could outjump, outholler
and Outright anything cum across on
these yere mountains. | had never
been licked by bar or man. and IL any
critter was shoutin' when | hove in
sight he shet up mighty sudden. Yes,
| was the hull thing, and it kinder
makes me lonesome to think back to
them days"
ITO the times when you was maxim
fule of yo'self!'' said Mrs. White
without raising her eyes from her knit
ting.
"Arter had got married." continued
Zeb. with wink at me. II thought to
steady down. but folks wouldn't let me.
If didn't have fuss with somebody
about so often they talked that was
losin' my sand. Mind yo. didn't go
howlin' around like ragin' lion lookin'
fur trubble. but the critters who were
achin' fur lickin's cum to me. had to
tackle six different men right we're to
home in one week"
"And you was glad to do itr' said
Mrs White
"Waal. I was no man to run for the
bresh when a man cum along and sed
he was most dead for want of a
whoopin'. took 1t to be kinder way
to turn to and give him what he want
ed One night in the summer. as had
just got to sleep. yellfn' starts up
about a half a mile away 1t was q
noise betwixt the roarin' Of lion and
the growlin' of a bulldog. and as 1t
drawed higher the old woman sot up
and asks:
"'Zeb White. but what in the name
of all creashun is that?'
"Tt's a bullgine got off the railroad
tracks and maxim it's way across the
kentry.' says l.
"'It's nuthin' Of the kind says she.
IT'S Gabriel soundn' his trumpet for
the Judgment day.
I'VE was both mistaken. however.
The noise came higher and higher. and
bimeby we made out that it was
man He had come to lick me. He
had come fifty miles. 1t was moon
light nicht, and l got up and looked
out the winder at him. The sight
made my hair curl. He was nigh
seven feet high and as broad as
barn He was as big as a giant in a
sideshow. When he saw my head at
the winder he gives a roar that goes
echoin' over the mounting and says:
"'Come down. Zeb Whiter
"'I hain't got no furse with you
says l.
"'Rut come down and obleege me
and make me feel that life is worth
livin'r
"'Pll come down says I. and not
withstanding the old woman hung on
to me with tears and said I'd be kill
ed went down.
Gar this Zeb Winter he asks in a
purrin' voice.
"'It arr
""Then am the thankfulest man in
all Tennessee, Zeh. I'm goin' to
squash yo' all to SQUASH
81 made up my mind that I was a
dead COON" continued Zeb. "but would
do the best could We squared off
and went at it. and in about two min
utes was surprised man.
$50 was the stranger. He was nuth-
In but windbag. He was as f1abby
as a goose and as soft as wax. and
believe I could have licked him with
one hand tied behind me- 1t was over
in five minutes. and he was hollerin' for
mercy. When let him up he said:
"'Zeb. it was squar' and fair. and I
hain't no complaint to make. Did you
ever see a circus?
81 never did
""Then go down to Bristol on We'd
nesday and see one Thar's all sorts
of animals, and one is called an ele-
plant He kin lick you in two min
utes.'
Men the old woman had deal Of
curiosity about that elephant. as we
had never seen one. and so we got
ready and went to town The circus
and the elephant was thar. along with
heap of other things We pays our
money and goes in. and I says to the
| Teller inside:
What's that critter they calls the
elephant. if you pleaseY
HE p'ints the way. and we go over
| and look at him. He was the biggest
Twin thing ever saw. but after look
in him over says to the old woman:
81 reckon he's achin' to be walloped.
| and reckon I'm the critter to do It,
''She begs and pleads with me not TO
| try it on She p'ints out the fact tnat
he's bigger'n our new shed and that
| don't stand no show. but differed WITH
her. The stranger had put me ON my
| mettle.''
"sAnd how did IL end?" | asked as