davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Not Llko CanutA.

At the Acorn Club In PHILADELPHIA
young lady was praising the wit Of
the late Bishop Mackay Smith.
He always had pun ready" she
said. smiling pensvely. II remember
meeting him once In Broad street sta
ton. was on the way to Florida at
the time, and said:
VIII 1t be very wrong, bishop, for
me to battle on Sunday In the Atlantic
OF Palm Beach,
The Atlantic off Palm Beach,?
said he. That, fear, ia a see over
which have no Jurisdiction
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
He Knew.

In one of New York's public schools
the other day this sentence appeared
in the reading lesson;
"The king and his escort passed
by"
Now" said the teacher, who can
tell me what Is meant by an 'escort?'"
A small, freckle-faced boy raised his
hand and in the vcrnacular Of the
East side said;
TITS Teller what's got Girl and
he takes her out walking"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
A Costly Quarrel.

Il understand that your wife and
Mrs. Exc are not on speaking terms"
tits so, eonfosnd 1t! And It Ia
going to cost me money"
Indeed! In what way?"
"Oh. my wife now proposes to give
big dinner party SO that she can
snub Mrs, Exc by not inviting her."
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Chinese Amazot,a q ~. Eron.

One OF the trains which carried the
soldiers also took to the froE. mum
PEI Of lady fighters, about a hundred
ana nifty In all. These Amazons were
Tho most enthusiastic OF one or the
companies Of women who have takei
" arms. Shanghai Mercury.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

The above Is correct statement
OF The Cairo Bulletin for the year
and the month Of March. 1912.
Z. A. DALEY,
Genl Manager.
Subscribed and sworn to before
me this 10th day of April, 1912.
LEO. j. KLEB.
Notary Public.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
No Demand for .hs unssr..usx.

, I'm afraid" whispered the sou.
brette, TN not be able to appear to-
night. You better get my understudy
to prepare to go on in my place. You
see how hoarse am"
3 "Understudy nothin'," replied the
manager. "You amt guin' to have to
wrap red flannel around your legs. are
you3".ssr AZ
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

Ola Gentleman Which one OF my
daughters do you wish to marrye
Young Man--Oh. Just let them hight
II Out among Themselves, SIT, and in
take the one that puts UP the poorest
fght PUCK, es
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

Speaker Clark declines TO enter
the New Jersey primaries, and Gov
serhor Wilson will not try to get
Alabama Reminds us OF the dear
AlphonEe" age.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

II has been determined that
Stephenson and Lorimer may retain
their senate seats, but they have
lost their anxious seats.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

Among immigrants recently land
ed at New York were two brothers OF
the name of Triandaphillides. A
name like that should be set to
music
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
His Hobby. /
The baseball fan,
Whate'er his age.
Delights to scan I
The sporting page.
Just the Thlna,

A politician came into local rail.
road office with constituent In tow
and requesting job .. .+
But your man can't speak English"
objected the railroad official upon
starting an examination.
That's true"
What can he do on railroad."
Give him Job calling trains"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
CIRCULATION STATEMENT.

Average number OF complete
and perfect copies of The
Cairo Bulletin printed daily
and Sunday during the year
of l9l1.........2 277
Average number OK complete
and perfect copies OF The
Cairo Bulletin, printed dur
ing the month Of March,
1a1a anEI
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
A Business prcsrect.

IT." aaid the nnoralist, impressive
ly, you keep on. at this rate there
will be h. to pay"
Yes" said one Of his auditors, dis.
nally. "and they are raising the FIRE
rates"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Ono Satisfaction.

"He married his stenographer.
"And | suppose she's doing the die.
Eating now?"
Yes, but he says he doesn't mind
hat much lie doesn't have to take
( down"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

(When the attention Of Tie Iul-
IetiR 10 called to any miSstatsmsnt
sf fact or to any error concerning
any man or thing, corrections will
pAeerfnlly be Hiads.l sasssass,
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
sAish.
VI.

do you take this woman for better
or for worse?" asked the preacher.
THAT will depend on whether he,
father is going TO loosen up or not
replied the absent-minded Bridegroom
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

Aviators should remember that
the asroplane never was intended for
10y riding.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Hnsy Enouch,

Marks-So you think Misa Bloom II
both pretty and intellectual? Hah
You can't make anyone believe that.
Parhs--Can't I? ] made her believ
it.--Tit-Bits.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

The suggestion that a wife on ght
TO have one-third of her husbands
salary is passe In most cases she
gets I'LL OF It.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

II the suffragettes should with
draw their patronage would It be a
boycott or a girleott.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

All OF the baseball teams showed
their usual early spring champion
ship form.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Her anA LAX

Nora Dust landed) --Bri6get, must |
buy many clothes whin git mesis a
Job?
Bridget (old HANDY -Indade. no;
you'll need nothin' but q goin' away
sown.p -fiarpsr's Bazaar.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
NOTICE 70 sUBsCRIxEIs

II you fail to receive your
paper by 7 \. M on week
days and 8 q. m, on SundayA
telephone to The Bulletin OF.
fee, No. SO, either phone and
one viii be sent TO you b.
special messenger.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Her cialms to Fame.

Rising A1thor--Ah. Miss Porking-
ham, you little know the glory, the
self satisfaction, the pride one feels
In having ones name brought before
the public mind!
Miss Rockingham "a Chicago
beauty well, you bet I do! Why,
page has named q patent ham and his
best brand Of lard after me.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

"Pop. will you tell me one thingY"
what IL II, SOM"
Are they going 70 try the bath tut
trust because 1t made wash salcs?"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
L-tters From the People

The Bulletin is pleased to al.
low space in this column to
readers who wish to discuss
matters OF public interest, but
distinctly disclaims responsible.
ity for views expressed in such
discussion.
All communications to this
department must be written
'n'v on one side of the paper,
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29
Chaery.

With this old world no fault be found.
And here's the reason why:
Though Oft in sorrows letters bound.
He had nos time to sigh.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1912-04-29

Nh sssn' IL A Match. q
'The big prizes In life are very few"
80 are big winners" I W.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
My Ten Day Treatment EDEE' Positively Cures BACkACHE Il HILL

Arc you racked with pain?
 Do you suffer so that your daily work fig a torture instead of being pleasure?
 Have you lost ambition, zest, enter prise, the desire to better yourself because of pains. aches, dullness?
 Has rheumatism set its clutches on your muscles and palsied your limbs SO that life is hardly worth living, your days a horror and your nights terror?
 can relieve your sufferings and | want to do ii now. Write to me. Fill out the coupon and mail it to me. That is all you reed to do. I will do the rest aud it will cost you absolutely BotLing.
 Rheuma tism, backache, kidney troubles, bladder troubles, chronic ca- tarrh. female weakness and the 80. called weakness of men are genera,iy due to one cause-uric acid poisoning. My treatment, which is different from all others, will dispel your pains, it will make life worth living. Take 1t and you will get up in the morning after a sound nights sleep. refreshed and invigorated. once more your muscles ws3 respond to your will and do so readily without twinges of agony, without reluctance. Your back ache will vanish and you will bless me and thank me as have done thousa nds of others.
 This treatment is not an experiment
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
The Senses of Plants

From Harper's Weekly.
 The sense most developed in plants Is that of sight. which enables them to ses light but not to distinguish objects This sense of limitation is found among many living creatures. such as the earth worm. oyster and coral. etc, which possess no localized visual organ, but give proof ot their luminous impressions by the con- fractions that they manifest when ex- posed to q ray of sunshine. Similarly, il k easy to gauge the influence of light on plants Cultivate plant in room with a window only on one side and it's stalks in growing will incline toward the source of light. Psychologists explain this by suggesting that the side to the dark grows more quickly than that ex- posed to the light. There remains, how ever the fact that the plant has re- acted to the light. of whose effect it was conscious.
 A sense common to many plants Is that of touch. Of this the most illustrative example Is. as it's name implies, the sen- sitive plant Another leaf, responsive to the touch, is the catch-hy, whose two halves close down one upon the other by means of central hinge.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

stage 30 years reported that monthly ay- craze earnings of S7.5O were miserable, but l make ends meet" Another actress who plays the role of principal lady in numerous dramas and who Is promised S55 for the whole season. says, "1 should be satisfied If half of this were really paid" The general low level of wages is shown by the fact that nearly all ac- tresses with $750 and upwards declared that they were very well satisfied
 On the average actresses playing minor roles at first-class theatres earn from S20 to s25 month: but in small theatres this is the average earnings of women play ing big roles. The actress cannot and is not expected to live on her earnings. Voll- rath von Lepel. a well known actor, has published a report in which it is stated that theatres in garrison towns pay lower salaries than elsewhere, and he ex- plains why The theatre managers ex- cuse the low salaries to applicants for posts by telling them they can dine at the expense of the army officers.
 In Germany and Austria the theatrical agent is even more autocratic than else where. For slight services the agent ex- acts blood money. The agent gets the actress an engagement for a few months, but binds her down to pay commission for years if the engagement is extended or renewed. An actress who earns only sl2O0 in three years is often obliged to pay the agent $500. and the agent draws the money direct from the theatre, A recent law suit shows that when a theatre was in monetary difficulties it paid first the agents commission in full. and after- wards paid part Of the money due to the actresses.
 The plight of the continental stage grows worse. In the last 15 years earnings in all over professions have risen by a third; but in Germany and Austria the earnings of actors and actresses have fallen. The only exceptions are few stars. The rank and file of stage artists are worse off than before. This is due to competition by the kinematograph. The xinematograph craze has caused the clos ing of IS German theatres during the last two years.
 Some of the worst sufferers are &C., tresses who join touring companies. These wander theatres pay badly at best and often do not pay at all. Actors and &C., tresses are driven by hunger to vagrancy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

II does not contain drugs that inJure you while giving temporary relief We have vouched for 1t according to law.
 am not offering to send you n sample but full ten days course of treatment with full instructions as to how to use it and all of it fs abso- Inte1y free to you.
 want to convince you thnt 1t fs your duty to yourself nnd to those who love you and are dependent on you to try this free 10 day treatment of mIne.
 No man to,tured with uric acid complaint is n for the battle Of life. He cannot bring his brain nor his hands to work properly when his body is racked with pain. No woman can care for her home. bring up her children Hzht or work B she Is cross miserable. distracted by suffering The struggle is too keen. co.apetitlcr too mercless the fight for success too strenuous to he handicapped by physical Ills. To the man or woman who suffers 1 want 10 bring relief comfort. happiness. success. fill out the coupon attached here and mall to me. Don't walt until With my Ten Day Treatment, l will also send my book on Uric Acid Disesses- It is pamphlet full of the results of experience of fhirfy-two years. during which I have specialized in uric acid complaints. it contains also few d the tens Of thousands T testimonial letters from preachers lawyers meh and women of affairs the country over who have not hesltated 70 say tua how much 1 have benefited them.
 DIR. Q. 8. ABBOTT
 P. S. Perhaps you have friend who is suf- ferer. Don't hesitate to have htm her i'll out this coupon or write letter you do t for your friend. They will call you blessed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
LISA DIEDHICHS

Berlin, November 30.-( Special )-Eu- ropes actresses are beyond doubt the worst paid, worst treated, hungriest of Europe's wage workers. The suicide by drowning in the Danube recently of 19- year-old Lisa Diedrichs has reminded the public of that. For two years Lisa lived, acted, starved and paid for her clothes on a wage of SS50 year; and then she cast herself into the Danube because that was pleasanter than death by hunger or than life with shame. People are asking how many Lisas there are who hunger and dress handsomely on $350 a year; and in- quiry has brought out the fact that most of the actresses of Central Europe dress and hunger on very much less.
 Reichstag Deputy Pachnieke, who stands for state interference, gives some facts. He shows that of 25,Oo0 German actresses, just half earn less than $250 a year; a fifth between s250 and S375; an- other fifth between s375 and S750, and only A tenth over s750. On the top of this rev elation comes a book by pr. Charlotte Enge- -Reimers, which gives some sur prising facts as to pay and treatment on Europe's stage.
 Dr. Engel-Reimers publishers data sup piled by hundreds of actresses them selves. A girl receives $22.5o a month, for which she plays the chief roles in the worlds classic plays. She undertakes to learn the role of Ibsen's Nora within three days. Before playing at night she has two day rehearsals of different plays Another girl is invited to play Nora in an emergency. and is paid $1 This is in a good theatre. That explains how, in German fourth-rate towns, serious drama and even opera are always on tap. The more serious the artiste the worse she is paid. Provincial operette singers rise to Insignificant" wages like $40 a month; but the girl who can play Ophelia with talent starves on S15 An opera singer in Bamberg, in Bavaria, reports monthly wage of S9.75; another 37 These are average earnings. A dancer in Altenberg is reported highly paid at s44 a month
 The actresses were invited to add re- marks to their data. and to report wheth- CT their earnings were living wages or not. One woman who had been on the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
AMERICAN ALTAR OF ROSES
Effort to Produce Valuable Perfume
 Oil in This Country
pm the Indianapolis News.

From the Indianapolis News.
 Horticulturists Of the bureau Of plant industry at Washington are conducting experiments with a view 10 growing a rose which thrives on American soil and from which altar of roses can be dis titled
 The worlds supply Of this perfume oil now comes largely from southeas- ern Europe. Last years importation, about 10000 ounces. sold at an average price of $i5 an ounce. The southern France and Bulgaria product is often adultera ted or Is of a low grade. The purest altar of roses produced is in Germany but il is very costly and little is exported.
 The bureau has been carrying on ex periments with the roses for year, one thousand varieties were imported from Europe and planted in rose gar den at Arlington. The first harvest was gathered recently.
 The roses were gathered early in tho morning with the dew still on them. The petals were placed in petal still and distillation made by,applying a low pressure of steam. The product was found to be Of much higher quality
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
GROWS BEAUTIFUL, HEAVY HAIR,
 WE PROVE ITs25 GENT "DANDER|NE'
Destroys dandruff-StOps falling hair-Ceans and in
 vigorates your scap-Delightfu dressing

To be possessed of a head of heavy. beautiful hair; soft, lustrous, fluffy, Twavy and free from dandruff is mere ly matter of using little Danderine.
 It is easy and inexpensive to have nice, soft hair and lots of it. Just get a 25 cent bottle of Knowlton'S Dan- derine now--all drug stores recom- mend it---apply little as directed and within ten minutes there will he an appearance of abundance: freshness, fluffiness and an incomparable gloss and lustre and try as you will yon cannot find q trace of dandruff or falling hair; but your real surprise win be after about two weeks use, when
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

you will see new hair-fine and downy at first--yes-but really new hair sprouting out all over your scalp Danderine Is, we believe, the only sure hair grower: destroyer of dandruff and cure for itchy scalp and it never fails to stop falling hair at once.
 If you want to prove how pretty and soft your hair really is, moisten a cloth with a little Danderine and carefully draw 1t through your hair taking one small strand at a time Your hair will be soft, glossy and beautiful in just few moments-a delightful surprise awaits everyone who tries this.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01
THE ROYAL COUPLE
 SEES CHRISTENING
Princess Death Causes SOr- row-Crown Princess
 Has Been Hunting
By MALCOLM CLARKE

Berlin, November 3O.-(Special.)- )-The Kaiser and Kaiserin went to Weimar to be present at the christening of the her
 to the Grand Duchy which was a very grand ceremony. His imperial majesty was one of the sponsors. and the infant Prince received the name of Wilhelm as d matter of course. The King of Saxony and number of other distinguished gen. tlemen were also visitors of the Grand HDuke and Duchess of Saxe-W Weinar, for, in addition to the baptismal festivities, there were two big sheets over the royal preserves. The Kaiser is, as is' well known. the best shot among all hi1< fer man fellow rulers; but the King of Sax ony runs him pretty close and there was a good deal of friendly rivalry. His im- perial majesty, however, beat his royal
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

than that sold by the peasants of south ern Europe. The quantity was small. however, averaging less than one ounce to 100 pounds of rose petals The European altar averages an ounce to 200 pounds.
 The horticulturists are encouraged by the quality of the perfume they have produced They believe that some what higher average quantity would justify American manufacturers placing an altar of domestic make in competi- ton with that of Europe Some new methods of distillation will be tried on the Harvest next June
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

dramatic farce, "offioer ee6," which ran for nearly year at the Gaiety theatre in New York. and when Gothamites ron tinue to laugh and applaud a comedy for that length of time, # must be "soi1e play" "Officer 656" Is sure enough play. In construction 1t Is absolutely novel and it's many scenes are so full If action. it's climaxes so tense in unexpect- ed surprises that it's audiences are treated to thrill after thrill in a perfect maze of mystery.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

want every man UT "oso"" reader of this paper who suffers to write me and ret this wonderful TEN DAY TREATMENT of mine FREE.
 It is not an experimental distribu- tion of medicine. such as have been made before, that l am offering you. 1t is not d sample of medicine or q proof, but a bona fide 10 day treat ment that bas cured a great many people and should cure you. And 1t ia absolutely free to you. There js no money to pay. 1 even pay post age and all charges. I just want to relieve thousands of sufferers In re- tirn for the success that my 32 years of labor in the medical profession have brought me.
 If you have rheumatism, backa che, kidney or bladder troubles. chronic catarrh, or any of the other Uric Acid complaints. such as often are female weakness and so-called male nervous debility, write to me, filling out the little coupon herewith at tached and I will send you at once a full Ten-Day Treatment, as thous- ands of earnest testim onials I have in my possession will prove to you.
 There is too much sickness in the world and It Ia mostly due to neg feet. Long treatments, expensive courses of medicine, with their con sequent expense, are no longer nec- essary. l can and do cure with these Ten-Day Treatments and l want to give thousands of sufferers a chance to profit by my discovery at my ex- pense. It costs yOu nothing, now nor Nt any time.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

The Crown Princess, with Princes Eitel and Princess Victoria Iuise. have been following the hounds in the weekly court hints Princess Victoria Luise looks charming in blue habit of rather bright shade and rose in her buttonhole; and her fashionable sister-in-law, the Crown Princess, affects a green habit, with a bowler hat Ten other ladies and hun dred men participated in the last hunt. When the so-called wild bear vas killed, Prince Eitel handed the fir-rwig.- which is the sign of the imperial hunts to the ladies, and the Crown Princess did the same to the men. who stuck the tro- phy proudly in their coats.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-12-01

n Ands of people in all waks of life have bene. ,ited by this mans advice. He tells you what you are capable of, and how you can be successful. He mentions your friends and enemies, and describes the rood and bad periods in your lifc. His description to past. present and future events will astonish and help you. All he wants is your name written by yourself. your birth date and ser ,o guide him in his work Money necessary. Men ,,on inc name of this paper and get Trial Reading free
 Herr Paul stahmann. experienced Astrologer. os ober Niewsadern. Germany. ssys;--
 ..rbs Horoseops which Prefesser Roxroy worked sut ,o, me is quite according to fine truth. H Is yery ,,,ver and conscientious piece of work. As an Astro ,onsr myself carefully examined hs Planetary cal ,..,ons and indications and proved that his work In .v.ry detail is psrfset and that he Is upto.dste tn h scisnoe.f
 Baroness Blanquet. of the most talented ia- dies of Paris. says;
 AI thank you for my Complete Life Rsadins which ia really of extraordinary accuracy. had already soo,uIted several Astroosers but before have Sssn answered with much truth or received sucn comulets satisfaction. With sincere pleasure 1 wIIl recommend you and make your marvellous scisnci tnoxu to my friends and seauaIntaness."
 IT YOU want take advantage of this special offs and obtain review of your life simply send you, fulI name. address. the date. month and place Mrs. or Miss. and also copy the following verse in ,our own handwriting:
 'syouf advice is useful.
 So thousands say,
 wish success and happiness;
 Win you show the wzyr' If you wish you map enclose 10 cents tstamps of your own country) to pay postage and clerical work Send your letter to ROXROY. Dept. 92 c ..0 ts.a enclose coins fin your letter. Postage on letters e England two cents