The Mathews journal. (Mathews C.H. [Court House]) 1903-1937, 1912-05-30
WEEKLY SHORT STORY
THE SCHEMER AND THE WIDOW.
By William II. Handy.

well. jerry" asked, how did
the advertising monographs come
out?"
Milsap stretched himself YEARLY in
an easy chair before the fire and
stroked his dropping brown mustache
sadly for a minute without replying.
/ had not seen him before for two
years, and knew chat he was just
foundering out of the slough OF des-
pondency which always lay between
the end of one of his schemes and the
, beginning Of another.
THE fact is, George" he said, re-
gretfully, that was a fine idea 1t
would have been the biggest thing you
ever heard of if it hadn't been for
one thing. Just when We were ready
to do business the music trust bust
ed"
yes, yes, 1 understand, jerry" I
interrupted. Somewhere a cog slip
ped and something went zip. 1t al
ways does, Jerry. There is only one
thing wrong with your schemes, there
is always one more cog in your wheel
than in the track you run on, and you
get bumped"
His last scheme had been to scatter
monographs that advertised a noted
breakfast food by song and story. The
manufacturer, according to Jerry's
plan, was to pay so much for each
record puS in circulation; and the only
drawback had been he would not do it.
I But Jerry rallied directly.
81 tell you, Menegan, I've got the
scheme this time. 1t will make coin,
you bet-the greatest scheme you ever
heard of-and it will give value re
ceived, too"
'WellT' l asker, obviously.
) Its a correspondence school," he
said, gripping my knee and peering
into my face like an encyclopedia
gent. ...~
Jon the ground. too late, jerry"
aid. There is already correspOn-
dence course covering every neld of
learning and endeavor, from the art
OF making peanus. candy 10 the sci
ence of not stamemring."
That's it exactly" he exclaimed;
there is a school for everything but
one, and that thing is the most i'm
porsant of all. 1t touches almost eV-
cry family in tnis great land, and is
question of great perplexity, of vi
tai Importance, of burning interest"
He paused to gather breath.
What is iS?" l demanded.
arising boys" he answered trium-
phantly. Il will start a correspon-
dence school to teach people how to
raise boys. You see, l want to spe-
cialize at first, but may branch oue
and include girls later.
The course will embrace every step
from the cradle to the u. s. Senate,
and VIII cost only $50. Don't you see
how it will appeal? Why, one doctor
bill would cosS that; one fine for
shooting craps; the kilograms to To-
cate a single runaway.
You see" he continued, our pa
tronage Will not be confined to parents
og boys. We will sell a great many
courses to young people and old maids.
The best recommendation for matrl-
mony anyone can have will be one of
our diplomas. In fact, may be able
to get laws passed requiring a GER
Etificate Of graduation from my school
before a marriage license will be is
sued"
About TX months later Jerry came
to See me again.
II am bothered about help" he ex-
planned, land l came 20 see ,Menegan,
If you would consent to take charge
OF the detective department You are
can do the work All you have 20 do
is to explain to parents actions OF
their boys which they do not under
stand, and teach them how to predict
from certain signs, boots and prepar-
atoms what the boys intend to do"
l consented to try it, and thereby
: lifted a load off Jerry's mind. The
concern, he told me, was very prom
Using. More than 200 students had
\ already been enrolled and many in
quiries were coming in by every mail.
It was to answer inquiries that Jerry
devoted himself-that was why he
needed help.
Usually | had little trouble in an
swering any inquiries that came 70
my department, but one day I had
letter from a woman in Kansas
which I thought best to pass up to
y Jerry-the fountain head of wisdom.