The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1912-03-08
Col. Graham'S Umbrella
copyright, 1911, by Associated Literary P1ess)
By LAWRENCE ALFRED CLAY

pattel himself on the back after
it's insertion. He had shown the
public that he was no worm to be
walked on.
When the colonel had purchased
the umbrella he had had his in
itials &C. G. c. engraved on the han
die. He had given them in his ad.
Three days later, as he stood at his
gate wondering who he could pick
a row with, along came a middle
aged man with an umbrella in his
hand.
Hal" called the man of war.
"Ha! your self" replied the other.
"You are the man that advertised q
stolen umbrella, aren't you?"
Eyes, and you've got it there!"
You 60 slow, sir! I bought this
at special sale at A. & G's, and
here's my ticket to prove that did"
But there's my initials right
there!" shouted the colonel.
And they are also mine. My name
Is Cyrus Grant. I've come from town
to tell you that you'd better be care
full how you fling the word thief
around. For two cents I'd have the
law on you!"
The colonel few into the house and
told Maude that she had brought
about the insult to him. and then
discharged the cook without char
acter, and sat down to remember that
there were IL umbrellas of the
same make and style in that lot.
That made II others just like his.
OF course, all the buyers couldn't
have initials the same as his, but
after an hour he was almost ready
to admit to himself that he had been
little hasty-just bit. For that
reason he went out and told the cook
that she might stay on a day or two
longer. That was as far as he would
go.
That evening, after dinner, as he
had got snugged down in his easy
doorbell rang in an imperious way
and after moment young man was
admitted He carried a rolled um'
brella in his hand The moment
Miss Maude caught sight of it she fed
from the room.
well, sir?" demanded the colonel
without looking at the card the other
handed him.
Il am travelling for the house OF
Perkins & Smith," was the reply.
"Well?"
"A few days ago I bought an UNI
brella at special SALE"
"Ah! My umbrella-the one stolen
from me few days ago! My initials
right here, sir"
And they are mine, also! Look at
the card in your hand and you will
see that am Claude Gillette. l have
read your ad., sir. and am here to de-
mand an apology. I am being twitted
by all my friends with being an UNI
brella thief l can prove that
bought this at A. & G.'s sir"
The colonel wouldn't apologize.
The best he would do was to dis
charge the cook again and try to
make himself believe that both men
were liars. Next day third man ap-
peared. He had a rolled umbrella In
his hand. He was about the colonies
age, and he was also q man who had
tantrums
"Sixty-tive years of a record in Of.
flee and out that cannot be i'm
peached!" he shouted, and yet the
day has come when l am charged
with stealing an umbrella! There 1t
is, sir! Look at it! Look at my in
itials! Look at this ticket to see
that it came from A. & G.'s! Apollo
giZe, sir-apologize at once! My
name, sir, is Clarence Georges
There were some hot words and
threats were made, but the colonel
finally cooled down and hired the
cook over again.
And a fourth man came and
talked about arrest and prosecu.
ton, and he and the colonel called
each other liars. Then tho latter,
fearing that fifth man hight ar
rive, went of to his club.
The fifth man came with a rolled
, umbrella and the initials &C. c."
on the handle. He way young
man and he had his interview with
Miss Maude just after 81 exciting
episode.
Il saw Col. Graham's advertise.
ment," he said, "and ] have called
to restore his property, must have
taken it quite by mistake
But you didn't" she replied.
You couldn't, you see, for here is
his. just found it in his room.
He didn't have it with him at all
that day"
"Then-then-"
Then they both smiled Then
they both laughed. Then the colo
mel appeared and said it was funny,
and the cook must be discharged,
and-and-"
If frequent calls at the colonel's
residence by Mr.. Claude Gorham
means anything, they mean that Miss
Maude favored him as a caller. t