Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1912-03-31

nOn1a nothing all about tact that
the old home of Henry Clay used real
office, that Fighting Bob Evans occupied humble
little brick house far down Indanaave, in neigh
borhood whence fashion and wealth had long since fled
They do bat eyeld when told that the dome
of the Capitol built of castron plates adjusted that
they slide another response to the varying
human intelligence when informed that Admiral Dewey
does not reside in the house presented to him by the
patriotic American public. -.
- But they do out of their trance when the speler
shouting in deep and foghorned voice., gets this off,
"On your right the Botanical Gardens, and in the
big building in the center plants from every part of
the civilized and uncivilzed world Of particular
terest is shrub which, under certain conditions, par
ayzes the human tongue. We call the mother in law
plant
At this sacrilege the rewlv-weds look deeply panied
and unable to believe that either would ever
want the mother of the other stricken dumb They
so Mortified by this evidence of the worlds hard bru-
taity that they do not crack smile when the
lecturer informs them later on =
"On your right is the Washington Monument the
highest one-story building in the world"
But they do sit up and take notice when they are
shown Perry Belmonts house, (which cost million
dollars exclusive of the ground, and they gaze open
eyed at the threemlio home built by Thomas
FWalsh. In the sonework of this house, the right
of the entrances there block of gold taken from
one of the Walsh mines.
Because all brides and bndegrooms expect to be
millionaires soon as they parachute down from
the realms of romance and begin to inquire into the
spiel: -
center Of more wealth than is REPRESENTED on similar
amount of ground any other part of the world. Here
there is nothing but money Every thing is ,reenbacks
Even the leaves the trees have green backs the birds
have bills in their mouths and the horses have checks
their heads. And these people never Satisfied In
the summertime they 60 away for little change"
This trip, which is usually desperate attempt to
show lot of interesting things fot of blind people,
generally ends at Arlington where the lecturer speaks
feeingly of deaths, flowers, and Immortality have
seen such spiel make all the newly weds cry if their
hearts would break. 1t is the first intation ey have
had that their happiness eternal and that. unless
they are both struck by lightning at the same moment,
Of them will have to kiss the cold lips of the other
goodby After they have cried sufficiently and tipped
the lecturer for the luxury of tears they buy ticket
back home and spend the next ten years describing
their neghbors all the interesting things they did not
If YOU don't believe that honeymoon love is blind
and in the matter of intelligent observation, raving
nut, all you have to do is to watch this strange weird
and marvellous element of the population seeing the
sights of Washington. They see about as much as a
choroforrned bat or blind fish and, what's more to
the point, they are glad OF 1t.
A LII sorts of newy-weds 60 Washington the rich,
"A the poor those from Virginia and those from San
Francisco the bfushng young thing of nineteen and the
elderly party who just squeezed under the wire and
proud of it.. Most of them rush in during the spring,
and the sunsets look like clouds Of romance hanging
close to the earth But the procession stops It
is good every day in the year. and people 60
to Washington to be married on Christmas Day, fgur
ing that each one is fine gift to the other.
Taking it all in all. Cupid is King in the national
Capital He wins the Presidents brightest Smiles he has
members of Congress waiting him, and he turns up
his at of the most sacred shrnes of the
nations history. He is of the most valuable adj
agents the hotels have and the politicians and
Government clerks recognize his victims every day,
whether they sit stone deaf in the public galleries
of the Senate down in the basement of the Treas
ury where, smiling fatuously and happily they hold in
their arms for moment bundle containing million
dolars-"for good luck"
COMING AND GOING