davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
GLOBE SIGHTS
BIZ THE ATCRIsOM GLOBE.

A good many are eager to help without
knowing how.
1t is as easy to make $4,000 as 5000
on typewriter.
If you want to say what you think,
cheer up your thoughts.
1t may also be said for the pianola that
it doesn't have to take lessons.
You may have observed that Limite :
train isn't limited to the printed schedule
It sometimes happens that love in
cottage won't stand the strain of being
removed to a mansion.
Dignity manufactured to conceal igno-
rance is another little characteristic
which adds amusement to the passing
show.
A woman invalid can, If not too i'll, ar
range her special scenery so people will
admire her in her sickness, but a man
can't do it.
Straw hats should be allowed as long
as there is straw hat weather but in beer
towns they are treated roughly after Sep
TENDER l.
One is sometimes disconnected by learn
ing that the villain on the stage is
henpecked husband when he isn't work.
ing at his stage business.
IAN old aunt of mine used to want me
to be preacher, and 1 probably was
meaner than necessary in an effort to
avoid any such possibility. "-Rufe Hos
k1ns.
Alb Adkins says his Sue is stage struck
He says she has changed her name to
Susette. and insists on giving a CORE #
imitation of perfect lady with nothing
to do.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
EVENING CHAT
One Way of Saving Money.
By RUTH CAMERON,

4
Ihere are a great many ways OF
saving money in this world. And ac-
cordlng to some people all methods
| lent 1 beg to disagree
| know one woman who most GER
! talnly saves money and yet 1 do not
admire or envy her
L said knew one woman. /
thought of her because she fhannens
to be a most fragrant example of the
| type. Actually 1 know a great MANY
people who save money in a way 1
| don't admire, and undoubtedly Won
also count them among your ac-
qGairtance. The prime necessity for
conducting this kind of saving sue
cessfully is to have a purse that is not
easily gotten at.
happens to go in town with you. The
conductor comes around for the fares
and she begins to hunt for her pocket
book. She has difficulty either in
finding 1t or opening it, and of course
you have paid the conductor while she
is struggling. At that her protests are
DIS eager as her search was not. Some
times she even backs them by trying
to get you to accept nickel, but when
you refuse she gives n with a resigna-
tior which is beautiful to see.
If you go shopping with this thrifty
erson YOU cannot help observing that
she has no trouble whatever in locat-
ing her purse when she wishes to
mako some personal purchase, but the
difficulty promptly recurs when it is
a case of getting soda checks.
Again, this is the type of person who
economies by not having telephone
and self sacrificinly contents herself
by Borrowing yours. You grant her
the use of it with all aIacrity, remem-
bering the time when you also did
not have that necessity of life, but
you cannot help wishing that she were
not sc economical as to omit to settle
for her pay calls.
This kind of person seldom wastes
q penny buying a newspaper. She
thinks it is terrible to fritter away
she let's her companion buy the paper
and offer her half of it. Or she reads
over her neighbours ;houlder, or picks
W the paper which someone who
could not afford to buy it half so well
as she. had left in the car.
If a theater party or some other
excursion is proposed, dutch treat
This is the type of person who never
offers to advance the money for the
tickets. Instead she let's you advance
it, ard then either delays payment a
few months or forgets it altogether.
have said ''she" all the time be-
cause I am more familiar with the
feminine economists. but 1 am sure
the class is not made up entirely of
females. Probably any of my mas
cu1;ne readers could tell me of the
male economist whose tobacco pouch
Is always empty when it is possible to
accept smoke from someone else.
Yes, economy is a grand thing, and
we couldn't get along without thrifty
folks.
But still less, it seems to me, could
they get along without the open hand
ed people at whose extravaganza they
often gibe?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

molecular activities of the brain sub
stance and the phenomenon of con-
seriousness.
In trying to deal with such a ques-
ton, he says we are on the boundary
line of the intellect where the canons
of science fail US. Science denies all
influence of subjective phenomena
over physical processes. In the abb
sence of the empirical fact, science
would be bound to deny that a. man
could raise his arm by an act of Volt
ton. only ''the phenomena of matter
and force come within our intellectual
range" Science is forced to deny the
soul, because it's dealing with physical
facts and forces have furnished it with
no criteria by which to validate such
a conception. There are questions of
mind and there are questinos of mat
ter; philosophy deals with the former,
science with the latter. The world of
the unverifiable is the world OF the
soul, the world of the verihable is the
world of the senses. We have our
spiritual being in the one and our
physical being in the other, and sci
ence is utterly unable to bridge the
gulf that separates them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

way: In order to settle this aIl-ab-
sorbing question before the weather
got too hot to be able to argue with
any vigor, a man in Stanford univer-
sity secured four rats of the same
parentage and age, and placed them
in rotary cages with speedometers at
tached.
One male and one female rat he fed
on a strictly vegetarian diet, and to
the other two he gave a mixed diet.
At the end of % months the female
meat-eating rat had run 5.477 miles.
and her meat-eating companion reg
istered LAY miles, while the vegeta ble-
eating female rat had run AT miles ano
her male companion had covereu
but 200 miles.
OF course, If these diets have this
effect on rats why shouldn't they have
the same effect on humans? But
would they? Some people are just
contentious enough to say that meat
fed to rats will excite their nervous
FORCES Just as too much meat will
cause kittens to have fits when they
are wont to cover considerable space.
But If that argument is not enough,
the 1act that GARNER and Wallet, the
leaders OF the Paris motor bandits who
We're killed recently, were both vege-
tarlans ought to settle the question
LOT all time to come.-The Steward.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
FROM OTHER PENS

EMPEROR WILLIAMS ILLNESS.
The first reports of Emperor Will
Jams physical breakdown find a meas
ure of confirmation in later adVices
that must serve to arrest the solicitous
attention or Europe and all the world.
Easily the most conspicuous and po-
tential of rulers, news of grave inn
port concerning his health holds an
interest far exceeding that which sur
rounds all other features of the pass
ing show. While what has been di-
of tho emperor's illness is not neces-
sari1y alarming, yet the premonitory
symptoms vaguely touched upon point
10 developments more to be appre-
hended than what the doctors have
been combating. Emperor William has
never been a well man, having been
severely afflicted and a great sufferer
from pain since his youth. His pres
ent ailment most probably is compli-
cation of ihs constitutional trouble;
and, if SO, permanent relief is aOt TO
be expected. Apart from the deep feel
ing of personal concern for the en-
ton politically attaches to the reports
from Cassel. 1t is recognized that
Emperor williams predominant infiu-
ence in the affairs of continental Eu-
rope is chiefly to be relied upon to
straighten out the complicated diplO-
matte situation and bring about more
stable international relations. In
whatever degree his ambitions for
Germany may have contributed to
prevailing conditions, his past per
formances give warrant that things
would not be permitted to drift TOO
far Another body of sentiment in
clines to the theory that there would
he less militancy in Europe with the
crown prince as the autocrat, but the
latter's undisguised feeling of histility
toward Englandn a year ago is not cal
culated to fortify the opinion that
peace would be better guaranteed I'M
der the prince than under the father.
Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
TO WIPE OUT PRISON STAIN.

Everybody who admires manhood will
hope that William J. Burke makes
good.
Burke was once burglar. He served
a term in the Massachusetts prison.
After his release he went to Philadel-
phia, where his record was not known.
entered politics as an anti-gang candi-
date and was elected to the city council.
One of his prison mates traced him,
and falling to blackmail him threatened
exposure. Then Burke wrote out a con-
fes sion, in which he told all about his
past life. resigned from the council and
disappeared.
For more than a month he hid in New
York. Then he decided to go back to
Philadelphia and face the music. He
was met there by his wife and step
daughter, both of whom stood by him.
A business man, who thought there was
good stuff in Burke. offered to start him
in business and the offer was accepted.
Burke says he entered politics be-
cause he wanted to drive out the crooks.
but he is done now. He says no man
can be in politics and stay honest if he
has no other means of support.
Burke now has an opportunity TO
prove anew that he is honest and
square. If he furnishes that proof he
should succeed in the fight he is max
ing to rehabilitate himself and win the
respect of his fellow men.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.

From the Philadelphia Record.1
It's when the rent is in arrears that
the landlord takes affront.
Peace hath her Victories which may
explains why some men never marry
A man isn't necessarily liberal in his
views just because he gives himself away
The girl who can make loaf of bread
is seldom the one who wants to make a
name for herself.
Biny-"Tm going to kiss you before /
time you were going?'
NeIl-''Miss Caustique boasts that she
never cries over spilled milk. Belle
Neither does a cat
Some, people don't enjoy good health be-
cause they are never happy unless they
have something the matter with them.
It's hard to tell @hen a woman is in
love. You never know whether it's her
heart or her liver that's out of order.
A woman is just apt to make the
mistake of believing every bachelor has
been disappointed in love as to think
every married man hasn't been.
Blobbs-'I was surprised to find that
your Englisb friend drops his his.
Slobbs-4I wouldn't mind that if 1 didn't
hold so many of his I. o. us"
Mr.. Guzzler between the acts)-'I think
I'll go out and get breath of fresh ali, :"
Mrs. Guzzler-''That Is mt the kind of
breath you usually bring in with you.'
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
Deadlocks i'm Conventions.

The nearest approach to a prece-
dent for the protracted balloting in
Baltimore in American political his
tory is found in the record of the
Democratic convention, also held al
Baltimore, in 1860. That convention
assembled in April and Stephen A.
Douglas was it's favorite candidate
from the beginning, but at the end OF
81 ballots he still failed to secure the
number of votes necessary to a choice,
202, and the convention adjourned to
June, when tyo more ballots were
taken and Douglas was nominated.
There have been few deadlocks, how
ever, in American political conven-
lions. The two-thirds rule, which has
since been adhered to in conventions
of the Democratic party, was first
adopted at Baltimore in 1892. There
was no opposition that year. however,
to the denomination of Andrew Jack
son.
When deadIocks have occurred,
either a dark horse" or candidate
who received few votes in the early
balloting has generally been the win
ner. In the Wing convention at Har-
risburg, Pa, December, 1899, the bal
loting lasted three days, and w. H.
Harrison received the nomination, his
competitors being Henry Clay, who
had the largest number of votes at
first, and Winfield Scott.
In the Democratic convention at
ed on the ninth ballot, having received
his first votes, "A in number, on the
eighth. In most of the conventions
of both parties the candidate who led
on the first ballot has received the
nomination. In 1852 Franklin Pierce
was nominated by the Democrats at
Baltimore on the forty-ninth ballot.
having entered the contest as late as
the fortieth. The other candidates
were Lewis Cass, James Buchanan,
Stephen A. Douglas and William L.
Marcy. In 1868 the Democratic con-
vention was held in this city, and Ho-
ratio Seymour was nominated on the
tweuty-second ballot, his name having
been mentioned in no previous call of
the states.
Hayes, in the Republican conven-
ton of 1875, and Bryan, in the Demo-
cratic convention of 1885, have been
counted among the dark horses" but
HAYES received votes on all seven bal
lots, while Bryan's nomination was ef-
fected on the fifth. Garfield, how
ever. was surely a dark horse" in
the convention of the Republicans at
chicago in 1880. The three strong
candidates were Grant, Blaine and
JoIn Sherman, while George F. Ed
nunds and z. B. Washburne. were
both in the running. Garfield had
10 votes on the second ballot, 1 on
the twentieth, SO on the thirty-fifth
and was nominated on the thirty
sixth.-New York Times
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
HYHAWKER JOTy

One year is as good as another for
the pessimists business. thinks Editor
Harris of the Ottawa Herald.
Uncle ST of the Ottawa Republic has
found out that mo matter how much a
girl lisps she can kiss straight"
The gentle, persuasive touch of onions
In the breeze betokens, to the Emporia
Gazette, the return of boarding house
hash.
And the man who has just paid his
ice bill, says the Salina Journal, has no
trouble in connecting the hot weather
with the high cost of living.
As the MarysvilIe News suggests: A
man must have a strange sensation
when trying to be presidential elector
for party he has bolted and is trying
to defeat.
Jess Napier of the Newton Kansan-
Republican insists that a good way to
avoid trouble is never to allow your
nose to project more than an inch or 50
from your face.
Luke McLuke of the Colorado Repub-
lican, says: When the bride wakes up
some morning and discovers that the
sun has risen without the authority of
her husband, you can bet the honey
moon is ended.
sun is shining. points out the Hutchin-
son News. The Congressional Record,
which is the longest and largest ever
known, will furnish more heat when the
gas goes down next winter.
A Hiawatha boy says, according to
the Hiawatha World that great many
o1 the Hiawatha girls are first night
ers." When asked for an explanation
he said you could hold their hand the
first time you were with them.
Editor Greer of the Winfield Courier
has made an important discovery as
the following observation in his paper
shows: Before owning an automobile
we used to wonder what became of all
the tacks and nails that were being
made in the world. Now we know
Albert Nitz did worse, reports the
Wathena Republican, than the fellow
who sat down on his false teeth and bit
himself, when, a few days ago, he ate
his teeth He was chewing a tough
piece of meat (where it came from affi-
ant sayeth not) and crown and four
teeth got mix d up in the deal and Mr.
Nttz swallowed them, being unable to
distinguish between them and the tough
piece of meat. We have not heard how
he is getting along or whether he chews
now With his gums or teeth in his
stomach.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
TFrom the Chicago News.1

Matrimony may be loves undertaken.
Cheap advice is apt to be dear if you
act upon it.
Give a man half a chance and he will
uncover small Crouch
Women have few bad habits because of
their funny ideas of what fun Is
People are apt to turn up their noses
at things they can't understand.
It's all right to have a temper, but 1t
should never be used for cross purposes.
A mans chief aim in life should be to
refrain from shooting off his mouth.
The nerve of a big man who attempts
to call little woman's bluff is certainly
the real thing
Nearly always after a young man has
kissed his sister in dark hall he discoY-
ers that 1t is some other fellows sister.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
[From the New York Press.1

[From the New York Press.1
A man might as well burn money up
recklessly as to take 1t home carelessly.
Reform makes more noise and does less
business than about anything else in this
world.
Even if a man were willing to write his
wife he couldn't find a postage stamp for
the letter.
Even an interesting novel loses most
of its charms for a girl when she discov-
ers the author has dedicated it to his
wife.
Any man can have genius enough t.
make his wife proud of it by never for
getting to bring her home something fol-.
her birthday.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
DAFFYDHS
BIZ q. NoALL.

If people stopped their chatter woul,
they be canning tongue?
(And the maiden Band of Hope is
husband.1
If the stars smiled would the moon
beam2
Lynch himl He's the boob that put
the ham in hamburg)
If they can pillow with a steam engine
can an electric dynamo?
(Back to the farm, boys. Life in a
big city is not what it's cracked up to
be-1
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
JOURNAL ENTRIES

In politics, expediency generally
rules, rather than reason.
4 \ =
Most of the brave men have never
had their courage tested.
y
Patting a man on the back is likely
to give him big head.
X y
Between the devil and the deep sea
there is plenty of admirable land.
X X
What has become of the old-fash-
toned folk who liked to entertain COM
pany?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
WHERE SCIENCE FAILS.

All questions that pertain to the
world within US are beyond the reach
of science, writes John Burroughs in
the September Atlantic. Science is the
commerce of the intellect with the
physical or objective world; the com
merce of the soul with the subjective
and invisible world, is entirely beyond
the sphere. Professor TyndaH con-
fessed himself utterly unable to find
any logical connection between the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES.

THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIE:
o! woman. woman, woman,
Most certainly you can
In torrid heat of summer
Give pointers to a man
On how to dress for comfort,
Be cool and clean and neat,
From very tip of hatpin
Down to your little feet.
A dainty short-sleeved shirtwaist
And stockings made of net,
And not a cuff or collar
To make you furne and fret;
Just gauzy whites and linen,
Made-well, we cannot say
But all designed and fashioned
To keep the heat away.
OH woman, woman, woman,
When warm waves hit the town
Your face is always smiling
While sun is sizzling down.
You dress to suit the weather,
No collars, cuffs or coat;
Still some men say you haven't
Got sense enough to vote.
New York Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY,

gubsCa fberg Of the state Journal
away from home during the summer
may have the paper mailed regularly
each day to amy address at the rate OF
ten cents q week or thirty cents a
month Cby nail only). Address
changed as often as desired. While
out Of town the State Journal w1l be
t0 you Ike a deily letter from homo.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
Bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

In one Kansas community, at least,
a fine line of demarcation has been
drawn between pioneers and ''old
settlers" According to the verdict a
pioneer" is one who came to Kansas
before the grasshoppcr year. 1874, and
sn old settler is one who arrived
after that period and has lived in the
state for quarter oe a century. What
is the next important matter for Kan
sans to settle ?'ss
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

Just because there are two or three
other states where the miXup concern
ing Republican and Bull Moose presi-
Dental electors is the same as it is in
Kansas, that does not give any merit
to the claims of the Bull Moosers that
their electors have right on the regu-
lar Republican ticket
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
Rats Need More Sympathy.

The argument between the vegetari-
ans and the meat-eaters will not
down" any more than will the late
MIR. Banquo's ghost One day the fruit
and vegetable eaters put it all over the
eaters of meat. and then the next day
the meat eaters have it all their own
way. Just now 1t is difficult to find a
man. woman, or child who will admit
that he. she, or it doesn't eat meat
practically to the exclusion of every
thing else. It all came about this
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

No wonder the Kansas horses are
dying. The "diplococcus" germ is
after them. The mere mention of the
name of this germ in the presence of
a horse ought to be enough to scare
the animal to DEATH
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

Even if Governor Wilson has a one
track mind, as some of his pewee
critics allege, it is evidently equipped
with few serviceable switches. He
recently declined to act as a judge for
q baby show
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

A modest scientist has finally come
to the front Professor Schaefer of
Edipburg university announces that
life can be produced artificially, but
he admits that he cannot make people
live forever
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

Here's a rich one. Colonel Roose-
welt declares that Woodrow Wilson's
Nomination was brought about by
bosses in the Democratic party,
Tom Taggart. Roger Sullivan and
Charlie Murphy. If you hear some
unusual explosions coming from the
direction of Nebraska, it is Mr.. Bryan
laughing. And he's entitled to a
hearty one
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07

Aviation is relentless in the pursuit
of its victims. Let a man stick to the
game and it will be sure to get him
sooner or later, generally sooner. The
popular Bud Mars was dangerously
injured the other day by fan.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-09-07
RY TIE WAY
By HARVEY PARSONS.

There is at least one marked i'm
proVement in literature: There ism
cub reporter in the WORLD who is
such rotten speller as the late Ed
mund Spenser.
Fort Worth woman wants di-
vorce because her husband makes
business of hugging her in public
Granted Call the next case:
By close scrutiny, one may see an
advantage in nearly any condition.
The 57-year old girl who is complct-
ing her education at a Penn Van
seminary doesn't really need a chap
erone when she goes out TO g fudge
party.
Veterinarians charge the dip1ococ-
Gus germ with killing the horses.
Guilty, no doubt The name OF said
germ would almost kill proof rea der.
The motion to disarm the Wichita
police force IS well taken. Judging
from the efficiency of the Wichita po-
lice force, the members carry crutch-
es, and crutch should be suf1lcien-
armament for a cop that DOESN'T know
the difference between 4 six-shooter
and q family meat grinder.
AS we understand it, the tank riders
may ride the tank so long as they
ride the Waterwagon.
Pumpkins are cheap, OUT no one
ever got a bargain in the purchase
of pumpkin.
That goes double for the squash.
AND the prune.
Mr.. RooseveIt's wild west effort to
hold up the Republican party is mild
in comparison with. what he might
have done, had he thought of it in
time. It's a wonder he Gidn Try TO
duplicate the feat of the late Mr..
Atlas.
If the war scare scares you, there
is a remedy; read some othtr maya
zine.