davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1912-09-15
Burns Anecdote.

DISCUSSING the Rosenthal murder
u William j. Burnss the detective. said
the other day to New York reporter:
: THE slaughter of Rosenthal reminds
me of a story-a story about a man who
wanted a job as janitor i'm q certain
building. This job was held by chap
with red hair.
We'll. our friend. one morning. was
walking by the river side, thinking how
happy he'd be if he only had the red
haired janitor's position. when he saw
something bobbing up and down In the
water. Was it a log? An overturned
boat? An eddy drove 1t shoreward, and
our friend-to his horror. and at the
same time, too, to his delight-saw that
the floating object was that same red
haired janitor whose job he craved.
He hurried instantly to the office OF
the agent.
- want to apply for your red-haired
janitors job, be said breathlessly. The
janitors drowned l just saw his body
floating down the river
The jobs already filed said the
agent.
Already? gasped our friend. Al
ready?
".Why. yes. You're late said the
agent. Didn't you notice that fat man
who just went out wiping his forehead?
Well. he saw him fall in?
SO that fat cuss has got my Job,
eh?'- said our friend bitterly.
No: oh, no. said the agent. He was
late. too. The job was awarded last
evening to the chap who had arranged
for the red-haired janitor to be pushed
overheard"
Evening star., 1912-09-15

when he beheld another young mana
fair-haired. stoutish. young man who
has a reputation Of being universally
cheerful Filled with hope, he rushed to
the stoutish young man and clapped him
merrily on the back.
How goes the world. old horse?" he
yelped. Been on your vacation?
The "old horse turned a red. threat
II give you fair warming" he growled.
IF you wallop my sunburn like that again
I'm going to knock your head off,"
For moment the Cub Reporter gazed
al him mute and Mortified.
Some fathead," continued the stout
ish young man in rasping voice. told
me that l would tan quickly during the
around camp in a sleeveless jersey:
When / got back the doctor told me 1T
was positively dangerous for man to
expose a hide like mine to the SUM-
sey and 1 have two blisters each the size
of pillow on my shoulder blades. IL
find the fathead who gave me that ad-
vice.
Words failing. the stoutish young man
choked slightly.
The Cub Reporter listened onlyfha at
tentively to this tale of grief. Soon he
excused himself and left his obese friend
still rubbing the spot where he had been
slapped.
X X
Fate tempted him at that moment into
nearby drug store. He wandered up
to clerk. who looked as though he had
escaped from the show windo3v OF a
clothing store. and asked how business
was.
quite good" replied the clerk.
Lots of calls for sunburn and mos
quito cures. 1 guess" continued the Cub
Reporter.
Lots" replied the clerk. ''but every
body wants to stave us off''
Here, inadvertently. a new and verdant
field of investigation was opened. The
question arose in the mind OF the cub !:
How many persons use their vacations
as an excuse for various ills which they
suffer?
Forthwith he went ito one of the big
department stores of the city. After q
time he found man who held some
polysyllabic Office, and who showed q dis
position to discourse on the evils Of va
demonstrating just returned from one
himself.
.-It's a funny thing" began the per-
sonage with the high-soundng title,
what variety of reasons there Is for
a vacation interfering with the routine OF
commerce. For instance, a woman comes
I'm here to get a few things. Ordinarily
she would plunk down her little money
Evening star., 1912-09-15

And old Giska (he says raised her
arms for silence.
1T is WE'LL" she chanted. You are
our Grand Coesre, given us by ST. Sarah.
You are the strongest and the cruelest.
We are your slaves, males and females!
Bleed the boughten babes!''
l have already mentioned the pretended
Sacrifice" which, in modern times at
least, ends always in the adoption of the
infants by the new king, and his ferocious
boast of vengeance on the outside world.
1t, too is more traditional than actual:
but the oath of King Sigusmund explains
it curiously:
"As the Lord drowned Pharaoh in the
Red Sea-" swears the Gypsy King. so
sink into the bowels of. the earth the
gypsy who swears on his Gospel and lies
to another gypsy! Let him be cursed,
and no robbery succeed
It dates from the year 1923, in Hungary,
when King Sigusmund granted the gyp-
sizes of his realm judges chosen among
themselves. Before such gypsy magfs-
trates, the gypsies swore this oath with
tranquil impudence. Their supreme chief,
at the moment, presented by the delegates
to the grand Palatine for confirmation.
traded his title of grand Coesre against
Evening star., 1912-09-15

here? Because here a servant woman
of Judea. in the time of our Lord. lived
the last part of her life-and became the
gyIsies' patron. If you doubt, ask any
gypsy about ST. Sarah and the Church
of the SITS. Marys of the Sea.
Alone among the lagoOns rises the ven-
cradle fortress-baslica that has existed,
in some form, since the dawn of Chris
tianity. Good King Rene Of Provence.
Anjou and Jerusalem piously gave it its
present aspect in 144S.
History and legend tell how two OF the
three Marys were cast on this shore by
tempest The Gentiles of Antioch had
put them in boat without sail or oars.
These were the women who wept at the
foot Of the cross. and who, with Mary
Magdalene. visited the tomb and found
the Lord had risen. Mary Salome and
Mary the mother of James lived in this
spot with their Egyptian servant, who
was wrecked with them, and whose name
was Sarah. Here they built the church,
died and were buried in it. And because
of Sarah-she who became the gypsies
patron-these sands are often strangely
peopled. Every five years, late in May,
LOOK.
Over the roads come professions or
bizarre vehicles, prehistoric stagecoaches,
prairie schooners and gypsy vans, loaded
with tent poles and surrounded by
dusky people, Bohemians from all lands.
speaking all languages and jargon OF
their own. The wagons are full of their
women and babies. The men are afoot
or horseback. They have dragged for
months on this trip, some for years.
Why do they stop suddenly, weep, cry.
gesticulate and point to the south? They
have arrived. Old gypsies point down
Evening star., 1912-09-15

and march away with her purchases.
Does she do that now? She does not. Her
opening remark in a majority of cases Is
Il want this charged to Mr.. Jones ac-
count. CMr. Jones being her husband.)
We've just returned from our vacation.
1t never occurs to her that this isn't a
valid reason for charging things to us.
OF course. in most cases we have no OBJ
lection to accepting the charge account,
as 1t Is only an item in the regular ac-
count carried.
THE other day a woman who has been
here many times looked me up and told
me she was gong to charge five yards
of cloth to her account.
Certainly. madam replied.
You see.' she continued. 'Robby
got malarial fever while he was away
with us on our vacation
Now that woman wouldn't think of
coming in on January 2 and telling me
caused by too much Christmas. That
is her private affair. But when it
comes to an ailment developed while
on vacation she thinks the whole wide
world is entitled to the information .
Only few short steps away from
this department store is a furniture
establishment. When the Cub Re-
porter entered. a harassed-lookinR
salesman with bald head hurried
forward and tried vainly to appear ef-
fusive.
NO." said the Cub Reporter. I'm
not going to build a home for myself
not with sixty-five cents. What I
want to know is whether summer va
cationers ever balk on furniture pay
ments when they return from their
trips"
The salesman's face saddened
All young men seem to hold us per-
sonally responsible for their vaca-
tions," said he
Yes. yes" painted the Cub Reporter
young men will come in here"
continued the salesman. "and prepare
to order their marriage outf1t-and
then explain at the tail end that they
can't pay more than SO much because
they're in need of money themselves.
After that we hear a long sad story
about q long sad vacation. II we don't
listen and appear sympathetic they get
insulted and march out. And it's the
same way with some OF the young mar
ried couples who are paying for their
furniture. They come in and explain
how heavy their expenses have been
during the summer. Vacations are
rough on the furniture business. my
boy. rough on the furniture business.
Across the street from the furniture
store was small shop which announced
it's ability to outfit the male human
Evening star., 1912-09-15

that Of "Egregus''-the common title OF
all barons; whence the tradition of the
gypsy baron" The gypsies accepted this
poor bargain because they believed it was
to set a seal on their Hungarian citizen
ship and permit them finally to become
children of civilization. But soon they
were thrown back again into their vaga-
bond life; and when the present house
of Austria came to the throne of Hun
gary they We're atrociously prosecuted
and again put under the ban of humanity.
Who knows what else happens in the
crypt?
My man of SITS. Marys says that ''the
earth trembles at their blasphemies,' and
that Old Omar, still living at 119 years
of age, 1.-The greatest of real magicians,
foretells the future of the world, each
time, for the next five years! The hag
Giska used to read a service from the
gypsy Gospel
"They firmly believe in their gypsy Cos
pei" says my secret informant. 1T has
verses like the following:
Evening star., 1912-09-15

er. Its little use in most cases. The
men who owe will pay eventually. What
l can't understand is the midsummer
madness that convinces most men that
there's no need of worrying about the fu-
ture as long as they have the present
with them. {.
"A man who will hoard his money dur
ing the winter will whoop things up in
summer as though he were millionaire
and return to this city again to find his
debts piled up and his bank account over
drawn. Yet they never seem to learn,
Bidding the young agent adieu. the Cub
Reporter turned away and strolled
thoughtfully in the direction of the most
until he was confronted by one of those
huge stores selling woman's apparel for
the most fashionable that he bethought
himself to enter. He had hazy idea
that in this place at least the omniyoroIs
nav of the summer vacation would not
appear. Yet even in this dream of lux
ury the sad cry was heard.
''It makes no difference explained a
saleslady confidentially (she was not
supposed to discuss such things), 1T
makes no difference whether the vacation
was at Colonial Beach or Newport. When
it is ended the charge account Is in
creased The rich woman has extended
herself to her ultimate financial limit in
keeping up appearances Her poorer sis
ter has done the same thing in a more
modest way. Between you and me- both
are in about the same fix"
Even the real estate agents. ordinarily
immune to all human Influences, do not
escape the press Of the post-vacation
days Payments are delayed, one agent
informed the reporter, and prospective
purchasers delay the consummation of
the transaction until they pull out Of
the rut.''
After his sidewalk chat with the real
estate agent the Cub Reporter went to
visit his uncle. His uncle-who is also
the uncle OF couple of thousand other
persons-does business under a three-ball
Sign and at the present moment possesses
the Cub Reporters watch and stick pin.
His uncle welcomed the Cub Reporter
joyfully.
"You han someding else to pud in?'' he
inquired.
The Cub sadly shook his head
''Hows business?" he asked.
"Peesness.' said the Cub Reporters
uncle rubbing his hands, ''vas nefer bet
ter den now. Efery one is back from va
cation. eh? Efery one hass no money unit
puds up watches mt clocks unit furni-
choor like 1t vas nodding. Splendid days
now; splendid peesness."
This startling sidelight on the summer
Evening star., 1912-09-15

"Only the Tziganes (gypsies) are true
Christians
Jesus said 1t. in truth. He loved only
the humble. the homeless. the poor folks
of the road. saying that the foxes have
holes. but He had no place to lay His
head.
Jesus said: Feed yourselves like the
little birds. who eat grains and fruits
where they find them.
THE little birds do not ask whose prop
erty 1t is
Jesus and St Sarah protect us"'
Back on the horizon We get a last
view of the mysterious old basilca.
The poor gypsies drag in their rickety
wagons along the shady roads of south
France French farmers do not fear
them-otherwise the magistrates would
soon clear them out. With their bears.
acrobats, music and sleight-of- hand, they
amuse the village in the twilight They
sell horses cheap. mend furniture and
utensils trade baskets for provisions, and
even help with the harvest.
Rich automobile tourists dash past. cut
ting up the smooth roads of Napoleon,
killing pigs. geese, chickens.
Let us not judge.
STERLING HELLO.
Evening star., 1912-09-15
Like Eve.

nOSE PASTOR PHELPS STOKES, at
N a dinner in New York, was describ-
ing particularly intelligent little coun-
try weeker.''
I'm soft and wistful little August twi-
light she said, this little girl and
stood watching the milking. The little
girl was complaining about her shabby
clothes-the gift OF some charitable or
ganiZation.
Eve she grumbled quantity. as she
looked down at her old-fashioned and
ill-titting dress-'Eve had nothing but
leaves to wear, and l have nothing bus
leavings.'
Evening star., 1912-09-15

from tip to, toe. The Cub Reporter
drifted toward this place, wandered into
1t and overheard bit Of dialogue be-
tween the heated shopkeeper and a young
man.
Not on your life," bawled the shop
keeper. Pm no charity fair
L thought You were." interrupted the
young man addressed; 'either that or q
rummage sale.''
The shopkeeper's face grew purple. He
Cub Reporter.
When you went on your vacation"
he yelled, you said you needed the
money to spend while you were away.
Now you want half my store on credit
because you say you've overdrawn your
salary. This is what I call nerve!
Now. II you're going to get rough"
began the young man.
"Rough?' exploded the shopkeeper.
I'm not rough. I'm patient! I'm calm!
But, by George. when I think Of your
coming in here after three months and
getting pile Of clothes on credit and
then telling me you'll see me about
Thanksgiving-
back of his head and fed incontinently.
That" said the shopkeeper, apostro-
phiZing the world in general, that Is
what comes of being generous"
The cub now advanced toward gilded
and glass door announcing that the in.
mates could and would collect any kind
of bill II paid q proper commission.
Ordinarily he would have Stunned such
a place like a pestilence. But enthusiasm
in his research overcame his natural
caution. He entered, and a brisk young
nam who sat behind q huge desk arose.
What is your name?' he inquired,
after the manner Of a we'll oiled gathng
gun. What do you owe. and how much
do you want to pay?"
''N-n-n-nothing," stammered the Cub
Reporter, Il wanted to f-f-ind out wheth-
er other people are paying
A shade Of sadness crossed the young
mans fine face
'Im sorry you don't owe anything" he
said politely. Most Of 'em owe, but
can't settle UP at this time-vacations,
you know. When our agents don't find
them they come in here with long ex-
plantations OF how much it cost to board
down on JigEer Island. They offer to
show us receipts to prove they really
spent their salaries on their vacations.
This time OF the year runs the post
Christmas days a close second IN the mat
ter OF short change
Don't you ever sue?" asked the Cub
Reporter, anxioLsly.
Occasionally, yes" responded the 9TH
Evening star., 1912-09-15

the thoughts of Marcus Aurelius another
line-"From vacations / learned 10 stay
away" He could not work because of
vacation. He was shy tobacco-more ia
cation. Finally he fed followed by the
whitening scorn of a city editor, 20 learn
how many others there were who had
things To blame upon their vacations.
IL was noon when he left his office.
Crossing the street he came upon Char
ley. who works in the Post Office Depart
ment and who observes the rigid rule of
escaping TO lunch jrst as the twelfth
stroke sounds in the high Post Office
tower Together they walked 10 quick
lunch counter. where Charley disconso-
lately laid down 10 cents and demanded
pie and coffee,
Sorry | can't buy lunch." complained
Charley. This trajectoried hypothenuse
out"
''where'je go?" asked the Cub Reporter,
spearing sandwich a la George Mcbride.
Down the river. replied Charley.
sailboats. fishing and swimming all at
prices varying according to your appear
ance. Why. ! believe they'll fence in the
river next year and charge you for look
ing at IT."
You needn't kick" said the Cub Re-
porter. .All you did was to drop your
roll"
"Ali?" repeated Charley. in surprise
'All? Why. that doesn't begin to total
up my complaints. In the first place
busted a shoulder trying to climb into a
boat. A doctors treating /. now and j
haven't any money to pay him: Besides
that i got hay fever and ii acts like it's
going to stick around all winter. Added
TO that | got myself engaged. She says
she'll call me up when she wants me to
buy her the ring. Think OF it,
The Cub Reporter took one look at his
melancholy friend and fled with the an
nouncerlent that they would meet later.
His last gaze at Charley showed that
individual mournfully devouring his pie
and asking total stranger IL he knew
ANYTHING that was good for malaria.
4As Cub Reporter had not walked faI
Evening star., 1912-09-15
Taken from e~mpf fteR REDS asypnen n ~ ~


: beside the Mediterranean.
there to a small speck. 1t is the holy
temple of the legend! The house OF st.
Sarah, 1900 years old and still standing.
welcomes her dear children, sons and
daughters Of the dust. the masters Of the
Hosanna! Sarah! The mother of the
Bohemians. She is waiting for them in
the crypt. she who every five years gives
the Grand Coesre, who wears the whip.
and who will whip the world!
They hasten Surah. Sarah! They
arrive. The caravans engulf the tiny
town and pass. to camp on the shore.
Automobile tourists-there is no railway
stroll among them, get their fortunes
told. and return, laughing and superior.
to dinner at the Hotel de la Poste. They
do not dream.
l was with such a party this year and
talked with the good cure, Canon Ribon-
who is in terror of the gypsies-and an
other citizen, who must be nameless, be-
cause it is not healthy to talk and re-
main on the spot.
I saw the outgoing grand coesre.
Balthazar the Croat bearded. silent
giant. rich-looking and dressed half in
leather. All are either gypsies of note
elected delegates, baron families"
descended from previous grand coesres.
rich moderns who can afford the trip-or
else poor fanatics who have been drag
ging on the way year. two years.
Astonishing mixture of splendor and
ignominy, light and shadow Delegates
% Cy,oi ",
English gypsies, Italian Zingares, Ger
man Zigenner Portuguese CiganOs,
French Bohemians, tinkers, basket max
Evening star., 1912-09-15

vacation stunned even the Cub OF course,
he had realized he was hard, up. But
that hundreds of others should be in his
position was a new and unpleasant reve-
latiOn.
do they usually get their stuff out of
hock?' he asked.
dot depends on de winter" replied
the Cub Reporters uncle. .'Eef de winter
iss hard most will be left here. II de
winter iss goot. den they will take 1T
oud early in spring. Some few will come
next month, few more the month after
that. Most will wait until spring"
Up the Avenue went the Cub Reporter
again. BY this time all the world seemed
to him a tragedy of vacations and the
penalties paid therefor. In each haggard
face he read the story of bill to be met
without funds to meet 1t. In each lag
ging step he conjured state OF remorse
caused by the recollection that the fall
suit would now be paid for if only Sally
hadn't been taken on those last three
moonlight sails.
The pallid men who had spent the sum-
mer in town seemed the only ones who
retained the slightest wholesome interest
in life. A moody journey finally brought
him athwart the entrance of the gaslight
company. He entered.
DO people," he asked some one, pay
their gas bills less regularly after vaca-
ton timer"
The official eyed him with tired SMILE
He too, had been on a vacation.
Il believe that there are less discounts
for payments within ten days." he re-
piled.
Are you sure?" asked the Cub Re-
porter. pathetically, seeking some ray OF
hone in the general murk that surround
ed him.
Positive" replied the official, tersely.
At the electric light company the story
was the same. The drug of the post
vacation days seemed as widespread as
the destruction of the straw hat Utter
ly depressed by what he had heard the
Cub boarded a street car and started for
his boarding house. AS he paid his fare
he eyed the conductor gloomily.
HAS anybody tried to stall for his
fare since vacation days ended?' he
asked
mot me- replied the conductor, short
ly, because they don't get chance.
Evening star., 1912-09-15

September /, 1912
VERY five years
the chief gypsies
of America sail
back to Europe.
Together wit h
gypsies of Arabia,
I h e ID a n u b e,
Germany. Spain
a n d all t h e
world they meet
outside a lone fish
ing village of the
south of France,
Evening star., 1912-09-15
CN-BITTEN,

CN-BITTEN, jig
z G r-bitter, empty
alike of pocket and
courage, the Cub
Reporter, with sew
eral thousand other
Washing ct o n | a n 8.
had just returned
from a seasid va
cation. He was a
dispirited. saddened
Cub Reporter, who
might have added to
Evening star., 1912-09-15

QuhER tss ws"ssfsas Ssrs%sn's' wssa ys'sss
Their Ruler-Terrific Ordeal
of the Whip-The History
and Legend of the Three
Marys-Gypsies From All
Over the World Journey to
South France-Sterling Heilig
Tells How Their Election
Takes Place and How the
New Ruler Finds a Place
Among His People-Ameri-
can Gypsies Take Part in
Ceremonies.
Evening star., 1912-09-15

Itself


didn't go anywhere. | sent my wfe's
sister and mother to the country for TWO
Honths and my wife and | did the re-
stfts around Washington.
Evening star., 1912-09-15

on the Mediterranean.
Here they choose the gypsy king. Why
Evening star., 1912-09-15

The Cub Reporter fled to his room, leav-
ing her to finish her soliloquy alone. He
had hardly reached it when from the
adjoining chamber he heard the uncanny
sound OF singing 1t was not, considered
as singing. an especially meritorious
product. 1t had the combined effect OF
q creaking hinge and bowling puppy.
But it indicated that the owner of the
voice was supremely and inordinately
happy-and this to the Cub Reporter
seemed uncanny.
Marching to the door of the adjoining
chamber. he beheld the form of the pale.
frail little 'man who occupied the two
rooms. second-floor front. The little man
was on his hands and knees engaged in
an industrious search for his collar but
ton, and as he searched he sang his gay
tune.
Had your vacation?" demanded the
Cub Reporter, partially to find out
whether the man was mad.
The little one turned. You bet!" he
replied; had the greatest time in the
world You've no idea what fun you
can get out of a vacation If you know
how"
..Where'je go?" demanded the Cub, en-
viously.i
"Go?" laughed the little man; why. 1
Evening star., 1912-09-15

Special Correspondence of The Star.
THE SAINTES- DELLA -MER.
Evening star., 1912-09-15

They pay their fare or they walk Trans
fer?'
Once inside the car the Cub Reporter
gave himself up to Byronic pessimism
Slowly and sadly he ascended the steps
of his boarding house and found. await
ing him in the front hallway, the sacred
granite form of his landlady.
I'm sorry to have to mention this to
you- she began.
Next week. said the reporter ma
jestically-'next week"
But this makes two weeks now" COM
planned the landlady. Cant you do lit
tie something for me this week.
You can have 65 cents" replied the
Cub Reporter, cheerfully THAT is my
limit"
Then, as the landlady seemed on the
verge of bursting into tears, he added:
Vacation took all the money / had
coming to me-
The landlady shook her head with the
air of one who fears the worst. You're
the third man who has told me that, >"
she said. Everybody seems to be with
out funds. How I'm expected to keep
this place going when none of my board
ers meet their obligations is more
than"