davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1912-02-02
Nov swimming Machine.

Providing cork jacket, which keeps
It's wearsr upright in the water. With
propeller, driven By two cranks.
New Yorker has invented a device
which ia . variation from most styles
Of swimming machines.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1912-02-02

Truth In q Few Words
1t is better for man to be thrown
On his own resources than, upon the
resources of hts frierds.-Exchange.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1912-02-02

him by Fred de Gressao and Harry B
Smith.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1912-02-02
What He Thouuht.

What He Thought.
Mrs. Aliway-oh, John, had a
dream last night that all your money
was gone Allway-"How much did
the dress In the dream COST"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
Gems of Mjnstreisv.

In%terlocutor Good evening. Mr..
Bones!
Bones-Good evening! Why is the
letter ''F' like a million dollars to me?
II give it up. Why is the letter F.
like a million dollars to your
1T isn't in reach. Say. why Go peo-
pie wear shoes on their feet"
"Why shouldn't theyy'
The stores always have them on
hand"
Interlocutor Good evening. Mr..
Tambo! How are you feeling tonight?
Tambo-Like a picturesque old flow
er covered we'll curb.
you're quite poetical tonight. But
what do you mean?"
Pretty well. My brother Bill al
ways insists on buying people drinks"
Yes; I've noticed that"
1.-The other day he built a henhouse
and put the nests away up ear the
roof"
"Why did he do that?"
HE wanted to set EN- up"
I%nterlocutor Mr.. Archibald High
note, our peerless tenor. will sing that
pathetic ballad. HE Couldn't Chew To
bacco, For His Teeth Were Out of
Whack."-New York Telegraph.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

with the single exception Of the Eiffel
tower in Paris, will be the tallest
structure in the world.
Private capital is to he utilized in
building the tower, which will cost
not less than $1,5OO.OOO and will be
one Of the main architectural features
Of the exposition. In all probability
it will be erected at the summit Of
Lincoln park, San Francisco, although
the site has not been chosen. 1t will
be of steel frame construction with
outer walls Of marble or terra Gotta.
The base Of the tower will be 2:32
feet square and 100 feet high, contain
ing a great memorial hall. From this
base will arise the main shaft. 73O
feet high and IS feet square. giving a
total height Of $50 feet. Four express
passenger elevators will be inclosed In
this main shaft.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

American sailors had been m%altreated
and murderously assaulted, and Evans
felt it his duty to demand protection
and reparation. The tiny Yorktown
lay in the harbor under the guns Of
the whole Chilean feet, yet Evans serv-
ed notice that if another of his men
was touched he would lombard the
town. He carried his point and sailed
away to the accompaniment Of sullen
ealutes from the Chilean forts and war
ships.
After a few busy years engaged on
the construction board which planned
the modern battleships and cruisers
came the Spanish-American war. He
was given command Of the battleship
Iowa.
When Cervera's fleet made it's fatal
dash through the blockading ships of
Santiago July 3. 1908, Captain Evans
ship tool a notable part in the fifty
mile running fight that followed. For
his gallantry in this action he received
the thanks of congress and was pro-
NOTED.
AS a rear admiral Evans was called
upon to take the Atlantic fleet around
the world. 1t was he who organized
the first world cruise of an armored
feet of that size and power. BY the
time he had reached San Francisco he
was unable to leave his bed Of illness,
and it was necessary to relieve him
from the command at that place.
Active duty terminated for Admiral
Evans at that point, and he went on
the retired list Aug. IS, 1908.
. Just before the fleet sailed the ad-
miral was the guest Of the Lotus club,
New York, and in the course Of a fare
well speech he caused a lot Of talk
when he remarked that the feet was
''ready for a fight or a frolic." That re-
mark was cabled all over the world,
and all sorts Of constructions were put
on 1t, but Evans never retracted a word
of it.
Once, the story goes, Admiral Evans
attended a service in Trinity church
and was ushered into the pew Of a
wealthy New Yorker. The New York
er, coming in, saw the admiral and, not
knowing him. took a card from his
pocket and wrote on it, II pay $1,000
a year rent for this pew" and handed
1t to the admiral. The admiral looked
at the card a moment and. pulling out
one Of his own. wrote on it, you pay
too much" and handed it to the New
Yorker.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
THE PURvEYoR OF CHEER.

GHE hummed a snatch Of a army song
He used t know. an It passed along
N To the never do we'll in the village
square.
Who pursed his lips on the catchin' air
An whistled it far t the tinsmith's door,
A man who never had U n before.
He raised his mallet an paused again
An called the words of the oil refrain
He used t know. an he sung an SUNG
Till all of his pots an his kittles run
In harmony. an the smith said: "Whew!
Now what on airth are we comm tew
When he cuts loose?" An he blowed his
fire,
An, raisin' the pitch up high an higher,
He sung with all of his lusty might,
Though neither the words nor the tune
was right.
The merchant passed, an he caught the
tune
Al TUX it home for his wife t Groom
Whilst cookin' over the stove as hot
AS Tophet, an cheered her, as like as not.
1t drifted out O. the door, it did,
An struck on the ears of a invulid
That longed for 1t. an I low it lone
More good than Pillbox's medicun.
The bus driver harked t. the liltin', sweet
Refrain an peddled 1t down the street
Till every one whistled it, old an young.
An them as couldn't to whistle sung.
1t seemed that the leave in the naples
stirred.
An even the storekeeper's kitten purred.
In yender field where the burrows turned
Their bumped backs up t the sun that
burned
The Teller who'd started the army tune
Set down t eat in the lei of noon.
He thought of his work an his heapin'
woes
An faulted Providence, l y
Like most men do, till he heard that SON
A naybor sung as he passed along.
But look" he said. with a happy grin.
What a world Of song we are livin' in"
John e. Wells in Buffalo News.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

two small and imperfect individuali-
ties have become merged into a large
and perfect one
Second.-Each half Of the welded
whole retains special functions. Yours
are to discern, to anticipate. to yield.
to cheer. to soothe and thus to
strengthen.
Third.-Never trust to hirelings the
essentials OF your husbands physical
well being. Understand and frequently
practice the art of selecting and pre-
pairing his food.
Fourth.-Be sure each day that his
garments are whole and clean and
suited to the season.
Fifth.-Constitute yourself an infalli-
BILE barometer whereby to forecast and
render harmless those electrical dis
turbances peculiar to the married
state.
Sixth.-Be to your husbands dark
moods the subtle. unsupported anti
dote; to his joyous mood the compan-
ion spirit of joy.
Seventh-Save your caresses until
you perceive that his dinner has been
| without a flaw. Kisses to a hungry
man are like frOth to a parched tongue.
Eighth.-Your tongue for assent. For
argument use only your eyes.
Ninth.-When your husband has an
attack Of govt depreciate the art Of
dancing.
Tenth.-1f you would convince your
husband that you are a better actress
than Bernhard. a better dancer than
Pavlowa, prove to him that you are a
better cook than NJ. Escoffier.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
The Career
:. of =
Fighting Bob"

- EAR ADMIRAL ROBLEY
DUNGLISON EVANS, who
died recently at the age OF
sixty-fve, was one Of the most
popular officers in the navy. He was
born in Floyd county. Va. in 1916.
Evans was a boy of sixteen when he
was sent to the Naval academy at An
napolis. Before he had got far with
his studies the civil var broke out and
he went to sea and was assigned to
blockade duty.
It was in one of the two attacks
made by the northern navy upon Fort
Fisher that young Evans received the
wound through the thigh that made
him a cripple for life.
He suffered three other wounds. but
as soon as he was discharged from the
hospital he again plunged into the
fighting and served until the end Of the
civil war with great credit. 1t is said
that when he was wounded he kept the
surgeons from amputating both his
legs by threatening them with a re-
volver.
With the ending of the war Evans
drifted for a time into civil pursuits.
although never r%elinquishing his con-
nection with the service. In fact, I'M
der Secretaries Chandler and Whitney
he became one Of the leading spirits in
planning the rudiments of what is o
the American modern navy. 1t was
Evans who took the little dispatch boat
to test the structural strength of this
first product Of the infant steel ship
building art of the United States.
Evans won his title of Fighting
Bob" in 1891. 1t happened that with
the gunboat Yorktown he dropped in
at Valparaiso that year. Some of the
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
t.toM!EN Warriors
WORSE THAN MEN
Opinion Of a BIiton Who Has
Fought Against Both.
USE TEETH AND Nails.
Sympathy For Dahornan Amazons on
Account Of Their Sex Is Badly Mis-.
placed - Interesting Incident Of
French Warfare In Africa,

"s HAVE held a commission in the
British army. and l have served
in the ranks: I have been a
traveller in strange places: l
have lived a life full of v%fcissitudes,
and l was for five strenuous and not
unhappy years in the French Foreign
legion"
With this paragraph Frederic Mar
tyn opens an account Of his experiences
as a member Of the French Foreign le-
gion. He writes of campaigns in
French Indo-China and against the
Dahomans natives of Dahomey, Afri-
ca, and in both cases the fighting was
often desperate.
Mr.. Martyr joined. like many 9TH
ers, because of some sort of scrape at
home. Perhaps the campaign against
the Dahomans was the most interest
ing of his adventures. There, at all
events. it was that the amazons fig
ured.
1.-The uniform of these female war
riors,' says the author, was a sort Of
killed divided skirt Of blue cotton stuff.
This garment barely reached to the
knees. 1t vas supported at the waist
by a leather belt, which carried the
cartridge pouches. The head was COW
cred with a coquettish red fez or ia
boosh, into which was stuck an eagles
feather"
In one place he says Of Senegalese
tirailleurs:
"a battalion Of amazons attacked
them and gave them a very rough time
indeed, but the tirailleurs stood their
ground until re-enforced by some ma
rine infantry. Any one inclined to
sympathize with the amazons on ac-
count of their sex and look upon the
combat between them and our men as
unequal may take it from me that
their sympathy would be misplaced.
"Best Men" In the Dahoman Army.
"These young women We're far and
away the best mem in the Dahoman
army and m to man We're quite
a match for any Of us. They We're
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

This bank collects accounts, and
offers to depositors absolute security,
prompt and careful attention, and the
most liberal treatment consistent with
safe and profitab BILE banking. Buys
and sells foreign exchange, drawing
direct on all principal American and
European cities, and issues its own
Letters Of Credit.
Interest paid on time deposits. The
highest cash price paid for approved
state, county, city and school bonds
and warrants.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

THEY FOUGHT LIKE DEMONS.
armed with repeating carbines and
made much better use of them than
the men made Of their rifles. and for
work at close quarters they had a
small. heavy backed chopping sword or
knife, very much like a South Ameri-
can machete, with which they did
great execution. They fought like IN
chained demons and If driven into a
corner did not disdain the use Of thei,
teeth and nails"
A Battle Incident.
1t was in this same campaign that
the following incident occurred:
A Dahoman warrior was killed
while in the act of leveling his gun
from behind a cotton tree at Captain
Battreau Of the legion at point blank
range. and as he fell his rifle clattered
down at the officers feet. Captain
Battreau. seeing that it was an old
chassepot. picked it up out Of curios-
ity and suddenly became very much
interested in 1t. He examined it very
carefully and then exclaimed:
"Well, this is something like a mira
Gle! Here is the very rife | used in
1870 during the war with Germany.
See that hole in the butt? That was
made by a Prussian bullet at Saint
Privat. l could tell that gun from
among a million by that mark alone.
but here's my number stamped on it as
we'll. which is evidence enough for
anybody. Who would have thought 1t
possible that l could pick up in Africa
as a captain a rife that | used in
France as a sergeant twenty-five years
ago? It is incrediblev'
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
NINE. MAETERLINCK.
Wife Of the Belgian Author 10 an Inter.
estine Personality.

Wife Of the Belgian Author 10 an Inter.
sstins Personality.
Nine Maeterlinck. wife Of Maurice
Maeterlinck. the famous Belgian au-
thor and philosopher. and who herself
is Il famous singer, has been pro
nounced a most interesting personality
by those who have met her during her
present visit to America.
Nine. Maeterlinck is a high priestess
Of the cult that breaches the perfect
wifehood. and she has evolved a phi
losophy of her own for reaching that
happy destiny in matrimony. From
this philosophy she has evolved ten
precepts which she calls "A Wife's Ten
Commandments" They are:
First.-Remember always that the
true wife is the inseparable half Of the
only complete human unit in which
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

His Method.

New Parson lat rehearsal, having no.
ticed that the double bass player uses
his left hand simply to support the In
strument)-1 see you don't use your fin
gers when you play, John.
John-Noa, sir; ye see there be some
as twiddles their fingers when they
play, an there be some as don't. an I
be O. they that don't.-Punch.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
hiuhlx Commanded.

Highly Commended.
Salesman Recommending blue neck
tie with large pink spots>-But
wouldn't you buy one like that? I'm
selling a lot of them this year.
Sarcastic Customer-Indeed! Very
clever of you. I'm sure.-Tit-Bit
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

D IVERSIDE CAMP 1O593, Modern Woodmen
N of America, meets every second and fourth
Thursday of each month at Odd Fellows hall at
3 O'Clock. Visiting neighpors cordially invited.
j. c. MYERS, V. c..
j. E. EPPERsoN, Clerk.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
An Extra Edition..

! A woman may think she knows
! a man like a book, but after
!. marrying him she is apt to dis
. cover a few more volumes.-Chi-
!. cago News.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

W. G.. CONRAD, Pres.
JAMES T. STANFORD.
Vice-Pres. and nager.
A. E. SCHWINGEL,
Cashier.
OMAR j. MALCOLM,
Asst. Cashier.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
Not a Hopeless Case.
No need to send for the doctor
II you can't keep still while
they're playing the 6ddle.-At
lanta Constitution.
Likely Enouah.

Likely Enough.
First Guest-I wonder why speeches
1T banQuets are called "toastsT"
Second Guest II suppose because
they are SO d~ry.-Smart Set.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28
The Truth Once.

The Truth Once.
do you think any woman ever be-
heved a man when he said she was the
1rst girl he had ever kissedT'
"Yes-Eve."-Satire.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

EAR ADMIRAL ROBLEY
D~UNGLISON EVANS, who
died recently at the age OF
sixty-fye. was one Of the most
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1912-02-28

~ HAVE held a commission in the
British army. and l have served
in the ranks: I have been a
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-10-11
JACK DESHA
NOT LIKELY TO
REPRESENT

Jack Desha, the Harvard student
whom Delegate Kuhio has chosen as
hts private secretary, will not be NAM
ed representative of the commercial
bodies in Washington, if the present
sentiment among leading members of
the Chamber of Commerce and the
Merchants association holds good
next winter.
The resignation OF George NICK. Nc
Clellan has left two bodies without a
representative at the national capital.
and Desha, as the private secretary to
Kuhio, is in the natural order of sue
cession in line for the job, but local
businessmen express the opinion that
he has neither the influence nor the
experience to make the kind of repre-
sentative they want at Washington.
Desha is highly regarded here, but
his youth is against his getting the
position, as he had been planning to
enter the Harvard law school when
his appointment as secretary to Ku
hio sent him to Washington instead
"a 1t was reported today that both bod
les are looking around for repre-
sentative and that so far there has
been no choice made.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-10-11
Army Officers in Honolulu Now
Watch the War News
Eagerly

That the gravest military problem
that confronts the Balkan states in
their united war against Turkey, is
that of uniting in fact as we'll as in
name, is the opinion of well-posted
army officers here, who are following
with keen interest the unrollng of
the war map of Eastern Europe. I'm
der one competent leader, and work
Ing out a concertsd plan of campaign,
the armies OF Greece, Sefvfa, Monte.
negro and Bulgaria are more than a
match numerically for the Sultan's
troops. But will there be concerted
action under one head? That is the
point On which local experts are
more than doubtful.
1T is hard to make out from the
brief newspaper dispatches just who
is beating who," said Lieut.. Col.
Campbell, adjutant general of the De-
partment of Hawaii, this morning.
Naturally, every army officer is in
terested in the developments of any
war, for every modern war teaches
its own lesson, which the entire mill
tary of the world can profit by. How
ever, it's too early in the day, and too
little is known here of actual condi-
tions, to permit of forming anything
like definite opinions.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-10-11
Appropriate Exercises in CON-
memoration of Notable
Day

The flag-raising exercises. which
began at 1:43, are being held this
afternoon at the Liliuokalani School
in kaimuki. The program for the
occasion is as follows:
l. Overture ........ Hawaiian Band
2. Introductory Remarks. .......
........... PreSldent
H. G. Davis of Waialae, Palolo,
and Kaimuki Improvement Club
. Song School and Audience
4. Flag Raising ...............
Geo. w. De Long Post, G. A. R.
). Red. White and Blue" ... School
s. Flag Salute and Drill .. School
{. Grafton Charles A. CottrilI
S. Finale, Star Spangled Banner"
............... Led by BanQ
The flag-raising is under the aus
pices of the Waialae, Palolo and kai-
muki Improvement Club. assisted by
Miss Needham, principal of the new
school. The flag salute and drill will
be performed by the pupils, who have
been trained for the occasion, and the
Grand Army ritual for flagTaising
will be performed. Residents of the
district to display the national colors
in honor of the event. -.-. r..
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-10-11
SHE COMES FROM DUBLIN TO
WE'D LOVER OF SCHOOLDAYS

Mr. Dingle came to Honolulu five
years ago and engaged in the carpen-
try business. Back in the ''old coun-
try" he and his bride were school
mates and during the years that he
has been a resident of this city a cor
respondence went on which finally
resulted in the pretty bride travelling
all the way from Dublin to Honolulu
to become the wife of her former
school chum.
After the ceremony reception
was held at the home of Mr.. Thomas
Kennedy on Kalakaua avenue, where
the happy couple were the recipients
of many beautiful presents and were
given the congratulations of a host of
friends. The guests danced until the
small hours of the morning and dain-
ty refreshments were served The
bride cut the wedding cake, carrying
out the time-honored tradition.
After short honeymoon at Hale
iva, Mr.. and Mrs. Dingle will be at
home to their friends at the residence
of Mr.. Kennedy on Kalakaua avenue.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-10-11
.cCANDLESS
ECONOMICAL
PARTY SORE

L. L. McCandless and the Demo
cratic leaders of this county are on
the verge of another break such as
helped to defeat McCandless two
years ago. ..-.f..
This time il is not a matter of plat
form announcements, but of finances.
The story from Democratic campaign
headquarters is that McCandless has
refused so far to contribute to the
county campaign, and no secret is
made of the fact that the county
campaign management resents it
deeply. 7,.
According to what the Democratic
leaders say, McCandless was ap-
preached just before he left on his
present tour of Hawaii and Maui and
told that the party was very short Of
cash; dangerously short, in fact He
was told that the campaign in this
county would help his chances great
deal and that as a matter of fairness
as well as politics he ought to help
the party exchequer.
The story goes that McCandIess
0oEu W. 90 Ca
pense in running shis own campaign
for Delegate. and that just then he
wasn't in a position to contribute.
His point has not been at all we'll
taken by the county campaign man.
agement, and one OF the prominent
Democrats was frank in saying today
that McCandless' attitude had antag
onized the party here to a consider.
able extent.
According to the inside" political
tips, the county campaign is not at
all flush of cash. When the news
came out some days ago that the
had secured small cor
ner on the auto supply for election
day, it was supposed that the treas
ury must be full, but this is denied.