davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

The SchooImaster's Guess.

Men wonder at what they do not un-
derstand, but a seeming marvel often be-
comes absurdly simple when il is ex-
planned. Many years ago a schoolmas-
ter, in the course of his travels, had oc-
casion TO stay for day or two at coun-
try tavern. As he sat in the public room
with dozen other persons, evidently
natives of the place, there came along a
man with a fat hog that he was driving
to market. Leaving the animal outside,
he entered the inn and joined the little
company. Several of the latter went to
the window to look at the hog.
That's fine pig you've got there,
neighbor," remarked one. "Do you
know what he'll weigh ?"
eyes, sir" returned the pigs owner.
al had him on the scales just before !
started out. What do you guess he'll
weigh ?"
The questioner, thus questioned in turn,
looked at the pig carefully. and made a
guess. The owner turned TO the rest
of the company, and said:
"Will not somebody else give guess?
Just for the fun OF it, let everybody have
try"
The proposal met with favor. One
after another, the men eyed the pig criti-
cally, and after due consideration, gave
their estimates of his weight. The
schoolmaster, who seemed deeply ao-
sorbed in his own thoughts, alone took
no part in the contest. But he was not
to be let off.
"Say, friend" the owner OF the pig
urged, "aren't we going TO hear from
you2"
The pedagogue, who perhaps had never
in his life looked attentively at pig,
rose, went TO the window, and gazed
out at this one. He deliberated for a
moment, then, with modest hesitation,
named certain number OF pounds.
AT hearing it, the eyes and the mouth
OF the pigs owner opened wide in as
toniShment.
"Wal, swan p he exclaimed. YOU'RE
the champion All the others guessed
either over or under, but you've hit it
almost TO pound"
Every one stared at the schooImaster
admiringly, but no one was shrewd
enough TO tell how he had been able to
make so good guess. 1t had not been
a lucky hit, although he could have done
quite as we'll without seeing the pig. He
knew nothing about swine, but he knew
good deal about figures. Having heard
the gueSses Of eleven more or less ex-
pert judges, he had added together their
figures, divided the SUM by eleven, and
Guessed" the result.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
The Story of Little Piece of Chalk.

A little piece of chalk tells an interest
ing history. To the unasSisted eye it
looks simply like very loose and open
kind OF stone, but if it is ground down so
thin that one can see through it-untll
it is thin enough to be examined with a
magnifying glass-it will be found to be
made up OF very minute granules, en-
bedded in which are innumerable bodies,
some smaller and some larger, but on a
rough average not more than hundredth
of an inch in diameter, having well-de-
fined shape and structure. A cubic inch
of some specimens OF chalk may contain
hundreds Of thousands OF these bodies.
Each of the rounded bodies is made up
OF number of chambers, communicating
freely with one another. These oddly
shaped bodies are of various forms, but
one of the commoneSt is something like
badly grown raspberry, being formed
OF a number OF nearly globular chambers
of different sizes congregated together.
They are the calcareous shells OF Fora
minifera.
The beds OF the oceans are covered to
a great extent with mud, embedded in
which are millions and millions of Skele-
tons OF oraminifera-animalS OF the SIM
plest imaginable description. A Foramin-
ifera is, in fact, mere particle OF living
Jelly, without defined parts of any kind
without mouth, nerves, muscles, or dis
tinct organs, and manifestlng its vitality
to ordinary observation only by thruSting
out and retracting from all parts OF its
surface long filamentS which serve Tor
arms and legs. Yet this creature is ca
pable OF feeding, growing, and multiply
ing; of separating the small proportion
of carbonate of lime which is dissolved in
sea water; and OF building up that sub
stance into skeleton or shell tor itself,
according 10 pattern which even the
skilled artisan Of the present time would
find difficult to initiate.
Some of the Foraminifera are known to
exist only in the greatest depths; others
that float on the surface shower the bot
tom with their minute shells as death
comes. Most OF the Foraminifera OF the
present day are microscopic, but in few
species the shell attainS diameter OF an
inch or more.
In the study of geology the Foraminif-
era are OF great interest, as they are found
in all the formations, from the oldest to
the newest, and in many places they
make up the chief part of great rock
masses. Examples may be cited in the
Chalk Cliffs of England, the nummultiC
limestones of Egypt, and the SilurianS
beds OF Russia.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Smith Came Back.

A much battered young man came into
a hotel and wabbled up TO the desk.
Chow do you do 2" asked The clerk.
"What can do for you 2"
m'd like TO have Room Thirteen"
said the battered young man.
"Room Thirteen ?" asked the clerk.
turning to look at the room rack. "Why.
cannot give you that room. II is al
ready occupied. But can give you an
other room," the clerk added.
"Nope. Must have Room Thirteen"
"But cannot give you that room. IL
is occupied"
"By whom ?"
"Mr. r. r. Smith,"
That's ali right, said the young man.
"Im X. r. Smith. just fell out OF the
window"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Drives Off A Terror.

The chief executioner OF death in the
winter and spring months Is pneumonia.
It's advance agents are cold and grip. ln
any attack by one OF these rala les no
time should be lost in taking 'h. beSl
medicine obtainable TO drive il OF Count
less thousands have found This 10 Ue Dr..
Kings New Discovery. MY husband
believes it has kept MIN from havirg Dneu
monia three or tour times, writes Mrs.
George w. Place, RawsoHvilIe, Vt, "and
Tor coughs, colds and Group We have
never found its equal" Guaranteed Tor
all bronchial affections. Price 30 CTS and
81 90. Trial bottle free at Hills Phar-
macy.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
FRAIL, SICKLY CHILD
Restored to Health by Vinol-
Letter to Mothers.

Anxious mothers often wonder why
their children are so pale. thin and
nervous and have so little appetite.
For the benefit OF such mothers In
this vicinity We publish the following
letter.
]. Edmund Miller, New Haven,
Conn, says: My little daughter, ever
since her birth, had been frail and
sickly, and was a constant source o.
worriment. Several months ago We
commenced to give her Yinol. / ir,-
mediately noted an improvement IN
her health and appearance | gave
her three bottles Of Yinol, and FROM
the good it has done her ! can truly
say it will do all you claim"
This child's recovery was due TO
the combined action Of the medicinal
elements extracted from Gods Hyers,
combined with the blood-making
and strength-creating properties Oh
tonic iron, which are contained In
Vinol.
Vinol will build up and strengthen
delicate children, old people and the
weak. rundown and debilitated. We
return the money in every case where
It fails.
OWENS &MlLLER, Druggists
Shepherdstown, w. Va.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Black Sheep.

From their folded mates they wander far
Their ways seem harsh and wild.
They follow the beck OF baeful star:
Their paths are dream beguiled.
Yet haply they sought but wider range,
Some loftier mountain slope,
And little recked OF the country strange
Beyond the gates OF hope.
And haply bell with Turing call
Summoned their feet TO tread
Midst the cruel rocks where the deep pitian
And the Turing snare are spread.
Maybe in spite OF their tameless days
OF outcast liberty
They're sick at heart for the homely ways
Where their gathered brothers be,
And oft at night when the plains fall dark
And the hills loom large and dim
For the shepherds voice they mutely bark,
And their souls 20 out to him.
Meanwhile BLACK sheep Black sheep !" we CRY,
Safe in the inner fold
And maybe they hear and wonder why
And marvel out in the cold.
Richard Burton
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

Some time ago the cashier OF bank ir
a small Missouri town was reported miss
ing and an examination OF his books re-
vealed a large sum OF money missing
from the banks vaults. The officials i'm
mediateIy sent to Kansas City for a de-
tective. When he arrived he sought the
president OF the bank 10 secure descrip-
tion OF the missing cashier.
"How tall was your cashier ?" he ask
ed.
Goodness knows" was the reply,
"but he was $4,000 short"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

81 suppose your wife was more than
delighted at your raise OF salary, wasn't
she ?" asked Jones Of Brown.
al haven't told her yet, but she will
be when she knowsit," answered Brown.
"How is il that you haven't told her ?"
"WeIl. ! thought Iwould enjoy if myself
a couple OF weeks first"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Fine Stationery.

Just a little reminder when you need q
pen, pencil, paper or any kind OF writing
material.
We have for social correspondence the
very best OF Fabric or Cloth Finish pa-
pers in boxes, both note and letter sire,
correspondence or invitation cards With
envelopes TO match. Louisine pound pa
per in both note and letter sizes, two
styles OF the letter size.
We have quite an assortment OF type
writer papers in both legal and letter
sizes, some bond and some in fabric fin
iSh. Typewriter ribbons for all machines,
typewriter erasers, oil, etc.
Pencils plain and indelible or copying.
also the smaller sizes used for programs,
etc.
We have beautiful line OF Tally and
Bridge score cards, besides score pads
for Bridge, Five Hundred and Auction
Bridge.
Every kind OF cards from the visiting
card 10 the playing card.
All kinds OF Inks, Clues, Mucilagc,
Photo-Library Paste, etc.
And that brings US 10 the one really I'M
potant article in this entire ad.-the one,
without which no man or woman has q
complete outfit for writing. OF course
you all know that by The above we can
mean only one article, and that IS the
"Parker Lucky Curve Fountain Pen," the
fountain pen which does nctleak. The one
and only Fountain Pen with which you
can write letter at any and all times and
then have clean hands.
We especially recommend for those
who travel or motor that they buy the
Parke Jack-Knife Safety, because Il can
be carried in any position In the pocket,
in the purse or suit case, and will not
leak.
We carry Parker Pens for men and
women in all styles and sizes and In
prices ranging from 81 so TO 5000 each
range wide enough TO suit every purse
or desire.
Miller's Pharmacy.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Enils A Foul Plot.

When shameful plot exists between
liver and bowels to cause distress by re-
fuSing 10 act, take DR.. Kings New Lie
Pills, and end such aouse OF your system.
They gently compel right action OF siom-
ach, liver and bowels, and restore your
health and all good feelings. 25c at Hills
Pharmacy.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

bladder remedy, be-
cause of its remark
able health restoring
properties. Swamp
Root fulflls almost
every wish in over.
coming rheumatism,
pain in the back, kid
neys, liver, bladder
and every part Of the
urinary passage. It
corrects inability to
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

A healthy man is a king in his own
right; an unhealthy man an unhappy slave.
For impure blood and sluggish liver, use
Burdock Blood Bitters. On the market
35 years. $l00 a bottle.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Anticipation.

Senator Bailey, OF Texas, was so fierce
ly attacked by some OF his opponents the
last time he was candidate for re-elec-
ton that one editor INDUCED in circum-
stantial forecast OF what would happen TO
him in the county convention the next
day.
"He was so specific about my finish
that he reminded me of story" said the
Senator. "An influential citizen in a
small town had an attack of appendicitis.
The editor heard the report and huriedlY
made an item OF it, which he printed in
this fashion:
"'Our esteemed fellow citizen, John g.
Harris, will go 10 the hospital tomorrow
to be operated upon for the removal OF
his appendix by DR.. Smith. He will
leave a wife and three children "
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

arshphysics react. .weakenthe bowels,
will lead to chronic constipation. Doan's
Regulets operate easily. 25c box at all
stores.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

hold water and scalding pain in passingit,
or bad effects following fliquor, wine
or beer, and overcomes that unpleasant
necessity of being compelled to go often
through the day, and to get up many
times during the night.
Swamp-Ro0t is not recommended for
everything but if you have kidney, liver
or bladder trouble, it will be found just
the remedy You need. 1t has been thor
oughly tested in private practice, and has
proved so successful that special ar
rangement has been made by which all
readers of this paper, who have not al
ready tried it, may have sample bottle
sent free by mail, also book telling
more about Swamp-Root, and how to
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

fndoutif you have kid.
ncy or bladder trouble.
When writingmention
reading this generous
offer in this paper and
send your address to
r.a
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

81 like that man you just introduced.
He knows enough TO keep his mouth shut
at the right time"
Eyes, he is trying 10 get accustomed to
his new teeth"
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05
Do You Get Up
With a Lame Back2
Kidney Trouble Makes You Miserable.

Almost everyone knows of DR.. Kilmer's
Swamp-Root, the great kidney, liver and
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

Binghamton, Y. The regular hfty-cent
and one-dollar size bottles are sold by
ali druggists. Don't make any mistake
but remember the name, Swamp-Root,
DR.. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, and the adj
dress, Binghamtcn, N. Y, on every bottle
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1912-12-05

MissionarY-Why do you look at me
so intently?
Cannibal-l am the food Inspector.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
Alexandria's VS.. Meridians.

The Alexandria football team VII!
play the Meridians A. c., of Washln;-
ton, in the Park Saturday at 4:1o p
m. The Alexandria team Is composed
of some of the best football players III
this section, such as Kemp CockreiI
the well-known line smasher OF 49ll
"Tany" Trigger, Mcbride, Schonsi
and Beahm of the same 1911 champ
ion team. Brown, new to the 1ooVDail
public, will play quarterbacN' VINO Is
as good as any in these parts. me
end position will be he'd by Nc
Dermott and X. Cockrell' win II
HAYDEN as third choice. Longooa'
Lyons will play one of the tackle po'
sitions. Nails, Owens and A. hayoeN
are also trying for backfield positions
'Dogie" Hamilton, who needs no IN,
PRODUCTION to the football lovers. VII
hold down center. The AleXandi1an;
have game pending with the Fort
Washington soldiers for Thursday
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
Well OyerhOws.

The old we'll located in the basemen:
Of Christ Church Sunday school on
north Columbus street, is again giving
trouble. For some unaccountable rea-
son the water overfiows in the we'll
and foods the furnace pit and base
ment. At times some difficulty has
been experienced in draining off the
overflow causing much annoyance
and trouble. A new line of pipe Will
he placed underground to correct with
the basement and furnace pit and
carry off any future overflow from the
well.
There is we'll similar to the one in
the Sunday school, located in the base
ment of the church. Both wells it is
supposed were built to carry off any
water collecting in the basement and
as drains were used previous to the
building of a sewer system in AleXan-
dria. The one in the church has given
no trouble.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
Work of Trespassers.

When Rev. C. Kelly Hobbs pastor
of the Second Baptist Church, re-
turned home Sunday evening from a
visit to Lorton, Va, with his family
he found to his agreeable surprise,
that his pantry had been invaded and
filled with a supply Of staple groce-
ries. During the absence of the pas
tors family members of the congre-
CATION got together, and, entering
the home, donated an unusually large
supply of groceries. Rev. Mr.. Hobbs
was first under the impression that
his home had been invaded by burg
lars. Upon investigation, however,
lie found that they were the right
kind OF burglars" and he has filed
no objections.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
NO INDICTMENTS RETURNED.
Special Grand Jury Finds No WilfIl
Violations of Law in Assess
mentS.

The special grand jury OF AleNan-
dria county, with ]. G. Dudley as fore
man, resumed the investigation ot
personal tax returns at the court
house this morning.
The jury this afternoon reporte'
that it had found no indictments, a;
they did not believe there had beer
any wilful violations of law in tho
assessments of property. They ais
recommended that the Commissioner II
Revenue make a supplementary IS
sessment. included in which there
should be report of bonds owned hH
people residing in the county; also
that physicians of Washington wEc
practice in Alexandria coui:' :,
ouired to take out licenses.
More than fifty residents OF tnt
county had been summoned to appeai
at the investigation, together witt
an additional number of witnesses.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
Holy Name Delegates at Bazaar.

The quarterly meeting Of Wash
ineton section, Archdiocesan Union,
Holy Nam Societies of Baltimore,
with $50 delegates in attendance, IN
cluding those from Washington and
Baltimore, met last night in st.
Marv's Hall. Matters in connection
with the recent rally unGer the aus
pices of this organization In Wash
ington were disposed of, together with
other business.
Following the business meeting the
delegates attended the bazaar at the
Young Mems Sodality Lyceum Hall,
under the auspices of the local branch
of the Holy Name Society. The mem
bers of the alumnae of st. Mary S
Academy also attended the bazaar in a
body. Arrangements have been made
by the managers of the bazaar for a
Children's Day next Thursday after
noon.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
SRERMAN'S CONDITION.
Vice President Reported TO be I'm.
proving Today.

Utica, N. Y, Oct. 29.-Vice Pres'-
dent James s. Sherman was reported
improving at his home today. Dr..
Fayctte II. Peck, who spent the night
at the Sherman home, issued the fol-
lowing bulletin this morning:
From midnight until about 5:30
o'clock Mr.. Sherman had quiet un-
disturbed sleep. He is now resting
quietly and feeling very much better;
in fact is physically and mentally
improved. The serious systoms Of TIE
last few days have disappeared and
the patient is now very comfortable"
DR.. Peck said that he would issue
another statement later in the day
after he had examined his patient.
Dr.. Peck said that last night was
he most restful the vice president ha''
put in since his relapse. The physic-
ians refused TO venture any predict
ions regarding the outcome of hiS
illness. 1t is said that Sherman is 4
very Sicl; man and that although ev-
cry thing possible is being done for
him, his death would not be surpris-
ing. However, the family has not
abandoned hope and believe that the
strong constitution of the sick man
will stand him in good stead at the
present time.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
"HELL" BROUGHT TO LIGHT.
John Armstrong Chaloner Published
His Latest Book.

The spirit revelations emanating
from He'll to John Armstrong Chaii-
oner and given publicity in Alexandria
several months ago have been incor-
porated in an interesting little book
which the master of merry Mill" has
just issued,
AS outlined in interviews published
in the Gazette, the book contains
what purports to be spirit message
from the other world-the tropical
side fthat mysterious sphere-de-
scribing his Satanic Majesty, the
abode of that sovereign and some CT
the things which are pulled off, IN
the neither kingdom. These descrlp-
tions were conveyed ITO the author IN
a flight of his unconscious mind, says
the book, by ia "dear friend" of Mr..
Chaloner, who lived in New York.
The author takes a fling at almost
everything. He says that the name
"New York" has a nauseatlg odor'
that the "bule stocking brigade" Is
"rum dunn" and tades another smack
at his relatives, the laws of the aoun
try, and, in fact, about every existing
condition. He tells the sensation or
the souls awakening after death,
delves into history, describes nu*i-
Der of things never seen by mortal
eyes, writes of Biblical doings with a
modern construction, recurs often to
Napoleon Bonaparte and his wars, CO.
gitates on fate, philosophy, psycho!-
ogy, prophecy, spirtualism, stoicism,
morbidism, hypnotism and a number
of other "isms," ending up with an eS-
saw on the "Witch of Endor."
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
MENACE TO NAVIGATION.
Overturned Schooner Drifting Near
Indian Head-River Notes.

A schooner, which has been struck
and overturned is drifting in the cham
mel a short distance below Indian
Head, a menace to navigation. The
schooner was loaded with cord wood,
a considerable quantity of which is
being moved about by the tide.
A big lighter which the Alexandria
Fertilizer and Chemical Company is
having built at Baltimore boatyard
for service in the transportation Of
iron pyriteS from the Cabin Branch
mines at Quantico to the suiphuric
acid making plant at Alexandria, is
rapidly approaching completion, and
within the next two or three weeks
will be ready to be brought to this
port.
Rebuilding work on the hill of a
pile driver belonging to the Clark &
Winston Company, Washington, which
has been in progress at the shipyards
in this city, the past month has been
completed.
Shipments Of fertilizer from this
port to the farmers of Maryland and
Virginia on both sides of the Potomac
have been unusually heavy this sea-
son, and the steamers plying ON the
river have had difficulty in keeping
the freights from accumulating.
The steamer Angler, which has been
on the route between Washington and
Washington Park, on the opposite
side of the river, during the summer,
has been placed on the river route.
She will 90 down as far as landings
in Port Tobacco Greek, transporting
freight and passengers. The Angler
made her first trip today.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1912-10-29
Tramps Increasing.

Now the frost is visible at early
hours in the day, the number Of no
nads is or the increase. People re-
siding on King street extended say
numbers of disciples of Coxey can be
seen at Spring Park early in the
morning. These specimens Of human
ity are, like some birds, migratory.
The season has come when they will
begin to move south where they will
spend the winter in more congenial
climes. AT the advent of spring they
will reappear on their way north.