davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
Lawmakers Try to Enthuse Oper Discussion, but
Manz and Lyman Failed to Be Stirred.

clarion call esophagus and the silver
plated tonsils. He pleaded as Patrick
Henry might have pleaded for the life OF
liberty. Yet every time he pronounced
the fatel word. pig iron.' somebody
snickered and the effect was gone
Manz and 1 listened painfully. sorrow-
fully, for half an hour. And then there
arose before me (and / think Manz saw
II, tool a vision of Patrick Henry in
the house OF buTgesses; OF Daniel Web
ster. OF Clay and Blaine. and all that
host who have thundered forth the
classics Of 'eloquence.
Classics of Our Forefathers.
I saw Patrick. yanking at his hair and
frothing at the mouth, as he shouted:
Il care not what others may think. but
as for me. give me liberty or give me.
high tariff on pig iron.'
1t was not effective.
Then there hoated wraithlike across
the upper air Of the chamber the terri
fed ghost Of Daniel Webster, coat tails
in both hands. Behind It was gaunt
specter:
'.High tariff and pig iron. now and for
ever, one and indivisable-"
It was getting CHASTITY.
These lurid words, Ike q fash OF
fame, spread across the ceiling:
Millions for defense. but not one cent
raise on the pig iron tarir."
Then followed:
God reigns-and the ad valorem duty
on pig iron still lives"
At that moment I awoke Manz. who
was shaking me and explaining that he
had concluded his drawings And as we
wandered to the elevator Manz said
something.
ANY man who heard that debate" he
sighed. will never ask again why ora
tory is fast becoming lost art in this
country" J. T. L
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04

Gentle reader, IL we should hold a SYM
postum on the theatrical taste OF Wash
ington. what would be your contribution
to it?
There is no town in the country which
presents a more continuously battling
puzzle TO the impresarios. They just can't
make us out. They bring New York
failures in here as stop-gaps, and like as
not they achieve unacceptable prosper
ity. On the other hand, plays which
Broadway calls ''knock-outs' and sure
fire" hits have only mildly interested the
local public.
No; there is no telling what Washing
ton will do. Theatrically, the town is
about the greatest gamble on the con-
tinent. OF course. vaudeville is an ex-
ception. Mr.. Chase never has TO worry
about what his public will do to him. He
has an established following that varies
only in fractional percentage from week
to week The same is also true Of the
popular price vaudeville houses, like the
Cosmos and the Casino. But when II
comes 20 the 81 theaters-
No; you simply cannot forecast wheth-
er you are going to do a $500 weekly
business in the Capital, or $4,000. II
you have a genuinely metropolitan pro-
duction you are reasonably sure Of
breaking even, but that is about all you
can be really sure of. You may be loath
to accept this statement as true. Ask
any local manager who you can engage
in frank conversation. For instance,
ALIAS Jimmy Valentine" brilliant little
melOdrama which won high success
throughout the country, played in WASH
ington last season to empty benches. The
actual net receipts OF the engagement
here would astonish the average theater-
goer IL he were told them. THE Gam
blers'' Jared hardly as well. and The
Gamblers came TO washington with the
reputation of being one Of the best plays
that Charles Klein has written, and Il
was normally expected to have big
week here. But no; the local public was
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
FLOWER OF EEwsPAPERDoM
QUICKLY FADES AWAY As
DUKES GAZE IS TURNED

whatever else he may not be,
"Gabby" HaskIn. president OF the Ma
tionaI Press Club. Is diplomat. When
the Duke Of connaught was in wash
ington he drifted up to the Press Club
and there was introduced to the emil
nent correspondents.
President Haskin had braced him
self for the speech. Just as he waa
about TO start. four club members who
had been mixing things In card
game upstairs, appeared at the second
doorway. They were. to put II mildly
decollete.
As they peeked in at the door. Presi-
dent Haskin leyeled a searching finger
at them and in his own oratorical way
said:
your highness sees before you the
flower OF newspaperdom."
Whereupon, amid the stified gasps OF
his highness, the four flowers faded.
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
THEATER MANAGERS SAY
WASHINGTON is TICKLE
No Way of Telling What City Will Like in the
PLAYHOUSE --

! not keenly interested in 1t, for reasons
best known to itself
It is a truism among local managers
that the public will not stand for melo-
drama at s. per; even Kyrle Bellew IN
-Raffies," and numerous other clever
crime plays" have met with a semi
cold reception here. And light comedy.
unless II be extremely well done or
there be some special or extraneous rea-
son for local patronage, does not fare
particularly well here.
Washington, however, has ALWAYS
proved to be reasonably sure in its loyal
ty and affection for stars. Maude Adams
is always sure OF packed houses here.
So is Chauncey Olcott, and Ethel Barry
more Especially in her matinee idor'
days., and "BillIe" Burke, Sothern and
Marlowe, Charlotte Walker. and others.
In fact, many a popular player has no
reason TO bemoan the alleged coldness
Of Washington. But as to plays, Inat is
a different question
It Is absolutely impossible to tell what
Washington will take to in the line of
farce, comedy, and the average realistic
play. None of the really big" plays Of
either foreign or native inspiration. un-
less one excludes THE witching Hour, "
has made much money here. For in
stance. THE Easiest Way THE Great
Divide Paid in Full" The Lion and
the Mouse" all of these and many more
renowned successes have been more or
less OF financial disappointment In the
Capital.
Washington dearly loves a good musi-
cal comedy or comic opera. ''The Merry
Widow" and The Chocolate Soldier
perhaps head the list OF recent favorites.
1t has a genuinely refined taste as re-
CARDS musical offerings, and will not
stand for ssroad ~ rOunaDtea To sum ,,,,
all its apparent theatrical idlosycracies
would take a volume: but II is certain
that 1t is absolutely independent Of Broad
way or any other center in its Judgment.
and in most cases 1t Is far more critical
than its sister cities.
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04

What is the most absolutely unpoetic
subject in the world for debate?
Pause end consider.
And now, having considered, let me Of
fer the answer-Pig iron
To be sure, all classes OF iron are more
or less unromantic. Difficulty is found in
mastering up proper flow of adjectives
on tacks. II is hard from an intellectual
man TO attain a look OF lost inspiration
while declaiming on the virtues of horse,
mule, and COW shoes.
Until Manz and I visited the House
press gallery last week and heard the
closing debate on Mr.. Underwood sue
cinct or sap-headed (according to your
politics and party we were open on the
question. 1t wasn't until after We had
heard those magnificent voices crying
like John in the wilderness that We came
TO know with a revelation. OF pain and
sorrow that the ne plus ultra OF nothing
to debate about Is pig IRON
Zinc runs Il a close second There Is
nothing particularly sprightly or Iovable
about zinc, but pig -pronounce-get
the efrect-pig iron, pig iron-why IT'S
CHASTITY.
Hill Beats Him to 1t.
We had Just entered the gallery when
Minority Leader Mann. mis- whIskers un-
dulating like the waves OF the Atlantic
upon a dreamy summer afternoon, arose
from his seat with copy of the bill in
his hand He evidently had a burning
thought, but Representative, Ebenezer
Hill. OF Connecticut, you know, beat him
to II.
"Mr. Chairman" said Minority Leader
Mann, passionately. 1T is with feel
Does the gentleman from Illinois yield
TO the gentleman from Connecticut" de-
manded the chair. The pitiful look of
palpitant expectancy upon Ebenezer's
face warned the minority leader that he
was not TO be denied.
II YIELD" he said softly.
Then. his arms working IKE piston
rods, Ebenezer did a percheron glide d.
rectly in front of the Democratic ma
jority and began to orate. Had he had
any subject under the sun, the tariff on
hides, or the war with Russia, or any
thing else. that speech would have bolted
the entire House. Democrats would have
cheered; Republicans would have gone
mad; the galleries would have-but what's
the use. That immutable pig iron stood
threateningly above him.
Some Mixed Metaphors.
'T appeal to you gentlemen" said Ebe-
nezer in a voice that would have moved
a stone to tears. IF We are to have a
tariff on pig iron let It be fixed tariff.
II we are to reduce the payment on pig
lron-pig iron-let US escape this sliding
scale OF ad valorem and make a rate
that will stand until the moonbeams of
another time, lowering lightly upon this
cold deserted earth. shall marvel and
He may not have put 1t that way but
that's the way it sounded And yet there
was not a cheer.
Representative Underwood arose to de-
fend the bill. He saved half an inch Of
room in the Congressional Record by re-
ferring to pig iron as pig. With this de-
vice-short, terse and snappy-he tried
to squeeze oratory from the subject. He
cried with the desperation OF one who
sees before him the ghost Of Daniel Web
ster.
And then came Representative Camp
bell. OF Kansas. owner OF the original
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
BOB GATES Is WASTING
HIS BEST TALENTS BY
BEING NEWSPAPER MAN

Bob Gates. Chesterleldian corre-
spondent from the Sunny Southland.
had one put over last week that he
hasn't figured out yet. He was fuently
describing something, punctuated every
two seconds with that fine old word
''suh," when an Irish newspaper man
wandered up to the group and began
repeating:
wasting time, wasting time"
How so?" demanded the colonel.
with that line OF talk and your
handshake." replied the Irishman. you
could make yourself a millionaire in
three months by going to New York,
visiting the dining-room of the Wal
dorf-Astoria every night, cheering
when the band played Dixie. and shak-
ing hands with people"
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
JOURNALISTIC REPARTEE
THAT HAS A MEANING
TO ALL WHO KNOW THEM

Speaking OF the dukes visit, he
dropped a cigarette soon after enter
ing the assembly room of the National
Press Club. and Harvey Jester, presi-
dent and vice president of I'VE in
sure anything" company. stopped like
a hungry wolf, grabbed It. and tucked
it lovingly in his vest pocket.
Col Graham Nichol. the famed So
cIalistic writer, who stood near by,
sighed wearily.
whats the matterT' asked Jester.
"It just occurred to me-" replied the
colonel, that now you've gotten one
from the duke, you'l hang It up beside
those $4,000 cigarettes you've hummed
from me-"
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
GOING IS AS GOING GOES"
ANOTHER WAY OF PUTTING
THIS PESSnMISTIC THOUGHT

1t was like this: Mine Host Schriner
is an optimist, Gus Kahlert is-well,
draw your own conclusions.
Yesterday at p. m--that IS, the yes
terday in questionable sun was shining
brightly, but the going was heavy.
Schriner remarked to Kahlert, Its a
nice day overhead, Gus" whereto Gus
replied: True enough; but we're not
going that way"
The Washington herald., 1912-02-04
Capt. Kidd Nopice Compared
With ID Street Secondhand Dealers
These Unique Merchants Haze Unique
DecaIogue Some SideLghts
from Observation.

lacks destination, or concentrated pur-
pose. Therefore is weak and easily led:
therefore-but It Is needless to dwell on
the endless mental process by which the
secondhand man comes to know his
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
CONCERT COURSE.
Last Opportunity to Subscribe for En- tirs Series-Alma Chuck Next Week.

On Tuesday, Dec. 10. the sale of single tickets will take place for the concert to be given by Alma Gluck in slater Memorial hall on Tuesday, Dec. n. Between now and Tuesday there is an opportunity offered for those who nave not yet subscribed for the course tO do so. The subscription list is at the, store of George A. Davis and all who Sign it before Dec. 10 will be entitled tp select their seats for the entire cour SC, as well as take advan- tage of the special price of $5 for the series of tffee concerts.
 The course this season consists of the following high class attractions: Dec. r. Alma Gluck, soprano of the Metropolitan Opera House company; Jan. f4. Adeles Margulies Trio; Feb. 12, New York Symphony orchestra of 50 pieces. Walter Damrosch conduc- tor. Local music lovers who have given expression to their feelings re- garding tllis seasons course are en- thusiastie over the high standing of the attractions that have been secured. Alma Gluck is a singer of the highest rank, s-nd the management feel that they are vsry fortunate in being able to bring her to Norwich. The Mar gulies Trio has been heard here twice before, and is considered one of the finest musical organizations of its kind ip the worI6- The New York Sym phony orchestra of 50 pieces is in a class by itself and there are few, if any, cities of the size of Norwich that would have the courage to engage an orchestra of the size and with the rep utation of the New York Symphony orchestra. This will be the last op- portunity to sign the subscription list. as after Dec. 10 the list will be with drawn
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
BREED THEATER.
Alkali ISe's Close Shave, the Comedy
 Scream at the Breed Today.

In the big comedy film at the Breed today the patrons have one of the most amusing and entertaining stories that has been presented at this popu- lar icture house in a long time. Fig uring as the leading man in this film is Alexander Carney, known the picture world over as All1ali Ike, and partic- ularly for the amount of trouble he can get into in a limited length of time. The character is purely a west ern one. and in this case he has fos- tered a luxu1iant growth of beard, and determines to sec the city for the first time. He is run down by a pass ing auto, and being insensible is car ried to the doctors office, where his face is carefully shaved and adorned by the necessary strips of court plas- ter. Securing new clothing, he departs for his western home, and the first person he meets is his wife's sister, who he attempts to embrace, and not recognizing him calls a number of punchers, who put him through a course of rough treatment and finally land him in the jail.
 In desperation he sends for his wife, but the loss of whiskers puzzles her and she refuses to claim him. Alkali puts in a few more hours of torture, and the sheriff is about to identify him as a notorious escaped criminal, when the city doctor arrives and manages to free him from his predicament. Wifey then claims him and takes him home for safe keeping.
 The Informers, Biograph, is the big dramatic event of the bill, being a strong civil war story.
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
Borouuh Briefs.
COLCHESTER
Mrs. John T. Browns Funeral-Fine
 Stretch of State Road.

William Carter of Boston was re- cent guest of T. F. Kinney.
 At the last meting of Colchester grange a class of eight received the third and fourth degrees. There was a large attendance, a number of out of town members being present. After the work Of the evening an excellent supper was served.
 Funeral of Mrs. John T. Brown.
 The body of Mrs. John T. Brown who died at the home of her son, Her bert Strong, in Hartford, Tuesday, was brought here Friday on the 3 o'clock train, and the funeral was held in the Congregational church, Rev. H. A. Blake officiating. Burial was in Lin wood cemetery. Mrs. Brown was a native of this place and 77 years of age. MT. and Mrs. Brown have a sum- mer residence in Packwoodville, about a mile and a half north of the village, which they occupied during the season, returning in the fall to Hartford, where they resided with MT. Browns son, Herbert E. Strong. She leaves her husband and two sons, Herbert E. Strong of Hartford and Erastus L. Strong of Westerly, R. I.
 Frederick A. Smith of New Britain was recent guest of relatives in town.
 F. L. Conde of Hartford was Col chester visitor Friday.
 Scouts Outing.
 The Boy Scouts under the leadership of Scout Master M. D. Wood took a hike to Colchester Falls and vicin- ity Saturday.
 Mrs. c. A. Wright of Springfield, Mass, is the guest of her daughter, Mrs. M. D. Wood, on South Main street.
 Completing State Road.
 The work of putting up the railings on the state road on the Norwich turnpike is being rushed. The con- tractor has men setting the posts and expects to have them all set before the ground is frozen. The work on the road itself is nearing completion, and when finished the road will be one of the best in this vicinity.
 Miss Ethel Randall has been at her home in Goshen for few days.
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
POETRY
DEAR OLD DONEGALI

Iris not that I'm complainin', have no fault to find, l chose the newer country. I've left the old behind; An, everything has prospered, I've scarcely lOet at all. But sometimes l be lOngin'
 For dear old Donegal 'Tis there the heavens are pensiya They rest the weary eyes; This sunshine is too dazzlin,.
 One tires Of hard blue skies. l think of mists and shadows That wreathe the mountain wall Till I can't speak for sobbin'
 For dear old Donegal An, you should see those m0untains, Those smilim valley ways. And hear the little streamlets Go murmurin' Gods praise No green so green as Irelsnd6.
 Where silver raindrops fall Between the sunbeams' smilin
 In lovely Donegal. lis there are all go friendly.
 lis here are all SO wise. Ye don't believe in pookahs,
 In spells or evil eyes. In Ireland the banshee
 Still walls by hut or hall Thank Godi the Little PeopAa
 Are yet in Donegal. 'Tis not that I'm complainins- An still my eyes are dim, l see the pleasant hearth glow.
 hear the evenin' hymn Across the soundin' ocean,
 own it's tender call. An evermore 'tis pleadin',
 Come back to DOneeali
 Sacred Heart Review.
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
HUMOR OF THE DAY

"Stin taking ice. seer" "Yes. re don't need it. but tho iceman offers such enormous bargains that my wife hates to quit."-LouisviIle Courier Journal
 He-A decisive battle is about to be fought l hear the Bulgsr1ans and Turks are already engaged. She-Oh. MT. Tidling, what an encouraging en- ample-London Opinion.
 Are you the leader of this brass band?" No" replied the distressed man with the baton. Every man iD this band thinks he's a soloist I'm the umpire. ."-Washington Star.
 Speaking of poets, that fe1op over wonder is evidently poet" I've seen him at a good many receptions. but I never heard him uncork any poetry" Maybe not; but just look al him eat" Kansas City Journal.
 Just my luck" Whats the mat ter now?7 q promised my wife I'd be home at 10 o'clock last night" And | couldn't make it. I suppose2' 'No. got in at just 9.45. but she was sound asleep and failed to get credit for it" Detroit Free Press.
 Miss Lahin-What has become of our friend. Mir. Clay? Mir. Rand-ds has taken employment In A powder mill for six months. Miss Lafin- How strange! Mir. Rand-Not st all He wished to break himself of ansok- 1 ing.-Puck.
 Briggs-Heres a fellow who writes | about the acme of selfshness without | having the slightest idea what it really | is. Griggs-Well, what is it? Briggs Having your wife. a cold air fend. insist upon leaving both windows in the room open and then rolling herself up in all the bed clothingl-Clevelsnd Plain Dealer.s
 Rounder-F'unny what ideas come into fellows head. This morning while dressing I was wondering how in the future life, could get my shirt on over my wings. Bounder-DOn't lef that worry you. What you want ty think about is how to get your hat on over your horns-Boston Transcript.
 She--Of course, am much hOnorsd by your proposal, but l must have A few days to think 1t over. He--Weii. when may l come for my answerg She-Let's see. Monday there's ths washing, Tuesday I must put up clean curtains and Wednesday l must make some jam. Come on Thursday.-F1i- l gende Blaetter
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
CompIetina State Road.
Brief State News

Winsted.-There will be no poultry show in Winsted this winter.
 Thomaston.-The 18th anniversary services of the First Congregational church close today (Monday).
 WatervilIe.-All of the sidings are lined up with freight cars and it looks like a busy month for the local freight agent.
 rrington.-Secretary John Jack of the ToTrington Musical association has received 1S5 applications for member ship this year.
 Bristol.--The burning of the Bristol opera house will be a big loss to the owner, Charles F. Michael, of Hartford, as the building was not insured.
 Westport.-By unanimous vote of the Congregational society, call has been extended to Rev. William Moe of New Hampshire to take charge of the parish.
 Middletown.-The annual illumina- tion of Main street under the auspices of the Business Mems association com- menced Saturday night and will con- tinue until after New Years.
 Brideeport.-A United States navy recruiting station was opened last week in room No 2S of the Lincoln building. The station IS in charge of a travelling recruiting party from the main office in New York and will remain in Bridgeport only for December.
 New Britain.-The Business Mems association of New London has written to the city clerk asking for informa- ton in regard to the duties of the chief of police and the building in spector of this city. The information has been furnished by Deputy City Clerk A. l.. Thompson,
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
TWO HEADLINERS ON AUDIToRI.
 JIM PROGRAMME TODAY.

Most vaudeville houses are content to have one headhner on a bill, but the Auditorium the first three days of this week has two acts that are gen tiine features. The first big act is the complicated slzit presented by Loring- Parquette & Co, entitled the Gibson girl This sketch is redundant with sit- nations of a mirth provoking nature. Mistaken identity plays an important factor in it, the whole plot hinging on errors Everyone thinks that each character is someone else, and the sit nations that arise from these compli- cations are simply inexplicable. Miss Blanche ParqUette, who has the title role, was formerly a model for the famous artist who originated the Gib- son girl, Charles Dana. Gibson.
 A spectacular musical novelty is presented by the Berniviei Bros, who offer their production, entitled Mid- night in Venice. A most complete equipment of scenic and electrical ef- fects Is carried, which go to make this act one of the most beautiful in vaudeville The Bernivici Bros. are most talented musicians, and could make a decided hit anywhere without the aid of their spectacular setting, but the two combined make an act without an equal.
Norwich bulletin., 1912-12-09
REZNOR REFLECTOR HEATERS

These odorless gas heaters turn cold to comfort. diffusing radiance throughout the room like the golden glow of a gorgeous sunset. For a cozy chat light the Reznor, other lights will not be necessary. Enjoy the comfort of fireplace with the work and the dirt eliminated. One of the little fel- lows will guarantee a comfortable bathroom for that morning dip. Prices $2.50 and sS50.
 The Thermax Gas Iron does the work with ease and greatest known econo- my. Manufactured to sell at s3.50. Our price only s2.25 each, complete with tubing. Cranes famous "Statite" gas tubing, the best by test" 7c per foot. The incomparable Ruud instan- taneous water heater and gas tank heaters always on demonstration.