The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-07-26
THE LIME KILN CLUB.
Brother Gardner Solves the High Cost
of Living.


Twin. Mo- dan thousand men hab
gibin DER opinions on it, and l propose
to say few words on de subJick my
self. has observed and Use gw1ne to
speak of de universal habit of extraVa-
gance dat has fallen upon dis fool
kentry.
I'VE have list of members num-
BERN over TO hundred. and do not
lar in de bank or could bury one OF
de chill en- widout borrowin de money.
Every Guild pusson seems crazy TO
spend every shillin' he kin git hold of
and go in debt besides.
Yesterday afternoon 1 took walk
ober to de cabin of Giveadam Jones to
see how his Eaters was comm along.
He wasn't home, but his wife axed me
TO DRIP in and have snack looked
for a glass of buttermilk and piece
of hoecake, but what dye s'pose was
spread befo' me on de table? In de
first place, dar was a white tablecloth
dat must have cost $3.50. Use been
keepin' house for fo'ty years and has
always reckoned dat oilcloth was good
huff for me.
Den dar was silver knives and forks
and spoons. same as you'd find on de
table of king. After dem came nap
kins and cake and custard and cold
beef and sweetcake, and befo' could
git my breath 1 was offered glass of
elaret wine
kin you blame me for pinchin' my
self to see if / was dar or summers
else? Oar am Brudder Jones Workin
In a woodward at SO week, and dar
was all dat luxury, same as if he was
de emperor of Russia. 1 hain't wantin
to discourage anybody, but I'm tellln
you dat a crash will come in de Jones
family sooner or later, and when 1t
does come dat family will drap to de
bottom like a grindstun thrown into de
sea.
"A few nights ago me and de ole
woman was invited to attend birth
day party of de wife of Samuel Shin.
We went bekase 1t was limited dat dar'
would be ginger ale and fried cakes
for refreshments. We had on de same
Sunday close we has had for de last
fo'teen years, and we had no sooner
got into de house dan de ole woman
nigh had a At.
Mrs. Shin had on a dress all kick
haws and frills and furbelows- dress
dat never cost less dan $50 and de
rest of de women seemed to be dressed
up 70 attend queens weddln. Mrs.
Gardeners old bonnet and my old coat
looked like poverty hung out on de
clothesline.
Il have heard de word gorgeousness
many times, but nebber knowed what
it meant till 1 stepped into dat house.
Oar was red and blue rugs on de f1oOhs.
lookin' glasses ober de mantelS, gold
chars and pictur's-a perfect revel of
eXtrava gance. Me and de old woman
was jest too scarf to move around.
when we looked for de fried cakes
and ginger ale we got three kinds of ice
cream mixed together. two sorts of
wine, three kinds of cake and heap
of candy. When we got home at last
we Jest sot dar and looked at each
odder for half an hour an nebber said
q word. Brudder Shin works in a flour
and feed store for $40 a week. OATS
his income. His outgo must be at least
twice dat. How does he do it? He does
il by runnin' in debt, and some day an
q firth aIxs. IL
house and lift il so feet high.
"Waydown Bebee, sittin' ober dar wild
his old suit on, looks to be a man of
sence and economy, but what did 1 see
first thing when I entered his house
one day last week? 1t was a rug wild
OF water out of gourd, but it was
brung to me in a cut-glass goblet |
When 1 was ready to go Mrs. Bebee !
axed me to waitsa mint till she played
a tune on her pianneri Tt nix of it! !
Brudder Bebee don't arm SO a week &c |
year round, and yet he can have tiger
rugs. cut-glass and planners! When 1 |
went home and told de old woman |
about it she opened her mouth and held
1t open for 10 minutes befo' she could |
say:
May de Lawd have mercy on NV
soul!'
DE street datsmany of US lib on IS
named Coon street. I has resided dar
Tor 20 years and had no fault to find |
SIX weeks ago Brudders Penstock and /
" mite began to go around wild a petit |
lion preyin' de common council to |
ehange de name to Rosamont street. |
Dey contended dat de name Coon street /
was degradin. Dey got a piece of NV /
hlno' kin tell you, when dey got |
around to me, and dun went at it and
olockeo de game. What's de matter |
WIG coon street? Nothin. If dar am
}nVthlnp
self e oooii MS
was in a grocery de oC1der night =,
1uy some con meal and Goldfish when
7ruoder Ffimf1an1 Johnsing come swell
- IN; he didn't see me, and he went
mead and ordered de best kind Of TO-
ma coffee. print butter. fine -four and
Nhlte sugar, same as If he was a MEM
'er OF de beef trust. He paid for ,e,,, |
'no sWelled out. and when he had dis
'Ppeared de grocer said to me:
,o NeeP your eye on dat coon, Brud-
Ter Gardner. He's bound TO hit DC
ground wild kerchug dat will bo ioos-5 |
wo miles, - "e iiearo
.slean q ana 70, de ole woman was sound
.apnad ~ aeI nights ago when somebody
saw dat de pusson wouldn't go away
,ire ueh l went out to find Colonel can
~, ~ oh oe ooahstep. He had on a plug
lie mad on a frock coat: he had On
2-cent pair socks and a red necktie. and |
11S ulanond pin nebber cost less dan So
y ny old he rout me out of bed at dat |
l tT OF de night? His rent was be-
l nIS ana ne wanted me to see de land
snort time ago I was waIkin' down |
re street one afternoon, and a cuITd |
ro IN come out of a carpet store and |
aid she wanted my advice thought |
a nao seen her somewheres, but it was
minutes befo' could place her Den |
made out dat she was de wife OF
Srudder Cahoots. Brudder Cahoots is one
!. de bootblacks in de possoffice and
[ lucky week wild him when he can
Grape together S. What his wife wanted |
ne 10 decide was whether she should
'et a royal wilton or an administer CARPET |
OF ner parlor, though at dat very time
ley had neither butter nor meat in de