davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
NOT so EASILY CORNEREn
Learned Author" In Something Of .
Tight Place, but Equal to the
Emergency.

Even when the son ''inherits" his IA
still keep his own, and on occasion
even be able to cope successfully with
his offspring DR.. James b. Angel
tells, In his "Reminiscences. the fol-
lowing enjoyable story OF his college
days at Brown university, under the
Presidency of DR.. Wayland:
The doctors son, Heman Lincoln
Wayland, one Of my classmates, In
herited from his father very keen
wit. The passages between father and
son were often entertaining to the
class. One day, when we were con-
sidering a chapter in the fathers text
book on moral philosophy, Lincoln
rose with an expression of great solem-
nifty and respect, and said:
"Sir, l would like to PROFOUND .
question"
well. sir, what is itf" was the re-
ply.
We'll, SIR" said the son, I'm the
learned authors work which we are
now perusing. | observe the following
remark"-and then he quoted.
The class saw that fun was at hand
and began to laugh.
We'll, what of it?" asked the father,
with merry twinkle In his eye.
Why" continued the son, Gin an
other work OF the same learned au-
thor. entitled On the Limitations Of
Human Responsibility nnd the fol
lowing passage"
he then quoted again. Clearly the
two passages we're irreconcilable. The
boys were delighted to see that the
doctor was in a trap, and broke into
loud laughter.
Well. what OF it?" asked the doctor,
and his eyes twinkled still more mer-
rily.
Why" said the son, with the ut
most gravity, ut has occurred to me
that I should like to know how the
learned author reconciles the two
statements"
Oh" said the father, that is sim
pie enough. 1t only shows that since
he wrote the first book the learned
author his learned something
Youths Companion.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
GAVE OF SURPLUS WEALTH
Rich Men In Other Days Lavish In
Their Donations to Their Fa-
voritc Cities.

Many a man who has inherited mil.
iions,' once said Frederic Harrison,
is gnawed with envy as he watches
practical man turning an honest
penny. How he would like to earn an
honest penny! He never did; he new
er Will; and he feels like a dyspeptic
Invalid watching hearty beggar en-
5oying a bone or a crust. Many a
rich man is capable of better things;
but he does not know how to begin,"
The ancient law suggests a restoration
OF the liturgies, the public services of
rich men as they were organized in
the model Greek republics. AT Atb-
ems the liturgies were legal and con-
stltutional Offices imposed periodically
and according to a regular order by
each local community on citizens rat
ed as having capital of more than
given amount II ALWAYS 70.
NAMED a public office, duty to be
niled by taste, skill, personal effort
and public spirit. Rich men contend
ed Tor the office. The chief ambition
OF a rich man came to be that of max
Ing splendid gifts to his fellow citi-
zens, and theaters, stadiums, colon
nades, aqueducts, gardens, Libraries,
museums, pictures. statues-all were
showered upon favorite cities by
wealthy men who possessed or covet-
ed the name of citizen" A few null
timillionaires in our American repub-
lie have made public benefactions.
May their tribe increase! The gift
of a public hospital or a school build
ing Is always in order.-The Christian
Herald.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

California Judge decided that
there is no judicial authority to keep
man from making love to his wife,
although 1t could stop his beating her.
The remarkable cause of this remark
able decision was that a woman in
Los Angeles had applied for an injunc-
ton to restrain her husband from in
sisting on being attentive to her. This
judge was not Solomon, but he real.
lied that only a Solomon could be
trusted to rule upon the whims and
Inconsistencies of womankind.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
PENNY WISE, POUND FOOLISH
Contractor Saved Mis- Nickel, but Was
Out Something on the Trans
action.

How to save a nickel and lose a
thousand dollars Is lesson learned
by a Bronx contractor. He was at
the Fordham station of the Third ave
nue. elevated and he wanted to go to
West Farms, at the end OF the Lenox
subway, to submit bid on a contract.
The ordinary way to make such a trip
would be to pay two car fares, but
this careful contractor saw a way to
complete the journey for a single
fare, but he says he will never do it
again.
He bought an elevated ticket and
rode down town to Third avenue and
One Hundred and Forty-ninth street,
where he got a transfer to the down
town subway train. He intended to
ride down to the next station, Mott
avenue, get off there and cross to the
uptown side and ride back to his des-
tination, thus saving five cents. I'm.
fortunately that day there was an ac-
cident in the subway, the trains were
blocked for nearly an hour and he
was in train that was stalled hair
way between two stations. When ne
finally did arrive at the office he found
all the bids had been opened and the
contract awarded. His bid, however,
was lower than the one accepted. yet
it was for sum sufficiently large to
have shown him cool profit OF
$1,000
Then he went out and spent about
$50 in drinks to drown his sorrow
New York Times.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Liked the Women of Boston.

What struck me most about the
women of Boston," says Sarah Bern
hardt In her recently published me-
moirs, was the harmony and softness
of their gestures. Brought up among
the severest and harshest of tradi-
tons, the Bostonian race seems to me
to be the most refined and the most
mysterious OF all the American races. ="
The only comfort for the New York,
Chicago. and Sacramento races of
Americans, In the face of this some.
what invfdious comment. is that the
impression was formed by the eminent
actress In the year 1879.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Personal AHrnnf

Striking members of the Amalga
mated Skirt Stitchers were holding a
conference
Where is that tall, thin girl who
joined the union last week." inquired
the walking delegates.
The secretary arose to reply:
She handed In her resignation this
morning"
What was her reason?"
she took offense when she was
called on to act as a picket. Judge.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
A kind-Hearted Man,

MT. WOmDat!
Couple of suffragettes out here
throwing stones at your window"
bawled the policeman.
How long have they been doing
that?"
ooh, several hours"
Let EN- alone. 1t amuses the girls
and l don't believe they'll hit the win.
dow"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Important 10 Mofbers
Not In Any Way Desirable.

do those people who moved into
he fiat across the hall seem to be de.
sirable neighbors?" asked the man.
No" replied the woman. Il watch
ed everything that came out of the
moving van. They haven't a thing
that We would care to borrow"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Plenty OF Material.

What are you studying there. Ola.
rice?"
About how to make delightful dish
es from leftover food. The cook has
left"
We'll, you can make some nice
dishes from leftover food"
Yes; and have plenty Of material.
There's great deal of food left over
since l began doing the cooking"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Public Oiscourxes-

You don't talk politics as you used
to-"
NO. replied Farmer Corntossel.
There's so much Professional talent
talkin' politics that an amateur can't
even git his own family fur an audi.
ence."
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Moslem Faith GROWING.

The proportion of Mohammedans to
the aggregate population of India has
steadily risen since 1881 1t is esti-
mated that the number of Moslems
under British authority in the Indian
empire is now 6s.oO0,0OO as compared
with 100000 80 years ago.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Kidney Pills and when l had used
four boxes, fen like another woman"
When Your Back Is Lame, Remem-
Der the Name-DOAN'S. SOC all stores
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
When Your EYES Need Care

Try Murine Eye Remedy No Smarting-Feels
Elne-Acts Quickly. Try 1T for Red, Weak.
Watery Eyes and GRADUATED Eyelids. Illus
trated Book in each Package. Murine is
compounded by our Oculists-not "patent Med
lctne but used In success ful Physicians Prac-
uce for many years. Now dedicated To the Pub
ie and sold by Druggists at Csc and 5Oc per Bottle
murine Eye Salve In Asephc Tubes, 25c and SOC.
Murine Eye Remedy Co.. Chicago
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

ed and stiffened and
| felt completely
worn out. Nervous
ness and headaches
kept me In an I'M
strung condition and
frequent passages OF
the kidney secretions
added to my discom-
fort. | was soon re-
lieved, however, after
| began taking DOan'a
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

How would you tell that ugly girl
she had complexion like peaches
and cream"
No lie about that / meant yellow
peaches and sour cream"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Clothes.

What on earth d'you keep on clap
ping for? That last singer was aw-
full"
know, but liked the style Of
her clothes and / wanted to have an
niher look at them."-London Opinio.A
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Paxtine Antiseptic sprayed into the
nasal passages is a surprisingly sue
cessful remedy for catarrh. At drug.
gists, 25c box or sent postpaid on re-
ceipt of price by The Paxton Toilet
Co., Boston, Mass.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
All the improvements

Il understand you have a dustless
sweeper and freless cooker in your
house"
Il have. Also a smoseless husband.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Good Practice

The Condemned-Sapristil You have
cut mel
Prison Barber-Mon dieu, why do
you complain? 1t is good training for
the time when your head will be cut
off.-Pele-Mele.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
COULD HARDLY MOVE.

Kidney Trouble Caused Terrible
Misery.
Mrs. J. s. Downs, 219 N. Sixth ST..
Chickasha, Okla. says: my back
across my kidneys became SO lame
could hardly move. My limbs cramp.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

My dear. there is entirely too much
caloric In the soup"
Nothing Of the sort We haven't a
bit of 1t left in the house"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Let me see. was Rome founded by
Romeo?"
mo. it was Juliet who was found
lead by Romeo"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Its Drawbacks.

She-Why don't you dance; don't
you like it?"
He-Oh, yes, l like it all right, but
he music always seems to put me
'ut. and the girl gets in my way.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

You don't scold your husband
when he has been out all night, do
your"
mo; but how do you know"
He told my husband you made tho
best ice water he ever tasted"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Something Just as Good.

Barber-Getting pretty thin on top,
sir. Ever use our Miracle Hairgrow-
Inc.
The Chair-Oh, no! 1t wasn't that
that did it.-Judge
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Garfield Tea is unequalled either as an
occasional or a daily laxative
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Occasionally We meet a man who
would rather work for living than
get into politics.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Many fellow who puts up good
front is talked about behind his back
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07
Rather Disinterested.

Let me take your sister apart"
Don't She is all broken up. as it
is"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Excited Customer-A man lust
dropped dead on the first floor.
Floor Walker lin big department
store)-That's all right, sir. You'll
ind the Undertaking Department" on
the fifth floor.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

Even the absent-minded man may
have a good presence
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1912-06-07

more fashionable than wall paper or paint and com,
sar less 1t Is too refined and exquisite In color to com
pare with any kind Of kasomne- Goes further on
tho walls does not chip. peel rub off, far longer
10 BeautiLui 1lnta. Gomez ali rcadx To mi Ia
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
HELEN KELLER
By MARY NICE HOSKINs

will produce the same divine thrill of joint ownership with God as the first child
 Upon Helen Keller was lavished the love that rounded to completeness marital happiness; but there soon came days that were heavy with clouds and dark ness hung like a pail over the once hap py home, for the light of joy and hope went out. It is not well to finger over these days, for they were fraught with so much sorrow to the father and mother of the suffering child. Suffice to say after many days of pain all that was left was a frail, delicate body, with no out ward communication, save through the sense of touch and smell, the least prized of all the senses, or of all outward forms of expression.
 The darkness of despair settled over the Keller home for the first born was left in absolute blackness-not single ray of light-blind-blnd.
 Added to this she .heard no sound of the wonderful life about her--the first faint chirp of the robin at dawn, the drowsy lull of the distant cow bell, the sound of tho mower, as he whetted his schythe. All the old-fa shioned sounds of farm life were never to be heard by the little one groping through the darkness-shut out from everything, for she was deaf-deaf.
 As Helen Keller grew there came the She wandered in her helplessness back and forth, feeling hes way along the thorny hedge, bending to the moist earth
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

Tho recent appointment of Helen keller on the board of public welfare in sehen- eetady. N. Y., by Mayor Lunn. who IS pronounced socialist, and was frst at- tracted to Miss Keller by an article In one of the magazines in which she uncoh- scously incorporated some of his theories in regard to socialism, adds another laurel to the fame of this remarkable young woman.
 Helen Keller will always be an object of abiding interest to Alabamians While the nation may present claims of owner shin. but she belongs to Alabama by birth. Her wonderful achievement is the one great thing to which Alabama bows her head in reverental attitude and de- nands the same of all the world.
 About three or four miles from where I am writing, just across the river, is the home of Helen Keller. There is nothing to mark it as different rom other homes that cluster about this little village, but the rich heritage of memories will ever make it a mecca for pilgrims of light. for there Helen Kelle, was born on one of the rare days of June-y7th-1SS0.
 The old homestead was called "Ivy Green" because of the old English ivy that runs riot over walls, fences. chm- news and trees; it was here the little life was heralded by all the love that comes by divine right to the first born in any Asme, for it matters not how welcome
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

fin so that nothing would interfere with their growth if they should come up.
 From the beans planted only two grew They were climbing beans, and they were trellised on poles and grew to the height of six feet, and yielded 60 pods each, with an average of three beans to the pod
 The beans attracted great deal of at tention and people came for miles to look at the enormous pods and there was much talk about there being a fortune in the seeds of the new bean. It was generally agreed that, as the beans were so prolific and so large, there would be a great demand for them and until they became common they would sell for a fancy price, especially to seed men throughout the country, who would want to advertise them as a new plant.
 Just when the beans had matured and were almost ready to pick some unknown person went into the garden one night and stole all the pods. It was never known who took them and nothing was heard of them until two years ago, when several farmers near Prescott obtained a bean apiece and planted them. They said they paid 8 for each of the seeds to a man. who refused to tell where he got them, and they did not know who he was.
 Last year about a peck altogether of these beans were harvested and were shown at the International Dry Farming Congress in Colorado Springs. It was called the Aztec bean, and the fame of 1t travelled over all the country. The peck on exhibition was all of the variety known to be in existence, and a seed grower of Philadelphia tried to buy them all. He offered s10OO for the peck, but it was refused.
 All of that peck of beans were planted this spring in different parts of the coun-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
Lots of Elm

From the Washington Star.
 For the past year or so several of the firms that manufacture cigarettes have been putting pictures of baseball play CTS in the boxes of the brands of cig- arettes they put out. These pictures have become very popular with the small boy and 1t has been the exper- fence of all cigarette smokers to be waylaid by youngster on every cor ner and greeted with a never-ending request for base ball players"
 It was just after the game and the thousands of happy fans were pouring out on 7th street. One of the stock holders of the base ball club came sauntering out of the grandstand gate with smile on his face that told of huge satisfaction. A cigarette was stuck In one corner of his mouth and his chest was inflated with excusabl pride at the dongs of the Nationals.
 With a rapid stride he swung into 7th street and started to walk down that thoroughfare. He was stopped several times to receive the congratu tu- lations of friends on the remarkable showing of the team. and each such oc-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

topped, not for the fauitless energy that ena bled her to persevere, not for the suc- css in finding an outlet for her soul nor for the accomplishment of those things that humanity deemed impossible, but for the bringing to perfection the imperial gift of Love-the love which makes all the world akin, and incorporating thls love into the hearts of others, for through her physical darkness, she gives to the world that light that was never on land or sea-that light wherein dwells the per- feet love. and that wonderful love has made Helen Keller a nne, strong, clean young woman, with high ideals and lofty aspirations.
 She goes to Schenectady to put those big. grand things Into something that will help mankind to sweeter modes of living. She will make her home among the people she will try to help. She will throw all her God-givtu energy and all the force of her magnetic personality into this work, and she wril make the seem- ing impossible to come 10 pass.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
A Patriot

From the Washington Star.
 Gen. Ramsay Potts. praising patriot ism at a Fourth of July dinner in Chi cago a few years ago, said:
 'I like to hold up as a patriotic ex- ample young Si Hoskins
 ''Si once decided to enlist. He burnt with a desire to serve bis country. So he applied at a recruiting office, and was duly punched and prodded. trotted up and down, jumped over chairs and tables. and so forth.
 Then came question time. All sorts of questions were fired at Si, and his answers were most satisfactory. Then came the stern inquiry:
 "'Have you ever served a jail sem tence?
 "'N-no, sir Si stammered; but, he added hastily, I'd be very glad to do Q medium sized one if it's necessary
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
REMARKABLE SEED IS MANY YEARS OLD Guarded by Aztec Mummy for a Thousand
 Years

From the Kansas City Star.
 A bean which grew from seed that lay
 thousands of years in a sealed jar in an
 Aztec cliff dwelling in Arizona has been planted by William T. Kemper. president of the Commerce Trust company, on his farm in Jefferson county, Kansas. It Is about six inches above the ground and be- ginning to put out tendrils that are curl ing around tall poll.
 Mir Kemper expects this one bean to give him a crop of 100 beans and those he will plant next year. and If they give 1 the same yield he will have 10000 beans, which he will plant the next year and get a crop of 100000 beans, and those planted | the next spring will give him 1000, 100000 beans, and then he will advertise the won ! ders of this newly discovered bean and give up the hard work of being bank president and go into the more lucrative | business of selling heans to farmers This bean of Mir Kemper's has one of l the most romantic histories ever attached 1 to a seed of any kind, not excepting the | famous wheat that was found in the 1 wrappings of an Egyptian mummy, where | it had lain dormant for coco years. and l was then planted and produced a new | kind of wheat.
 Twelve years ago Sharlot H. Hall of | fical historian for Arizona. while mak- | ing researches in the prehistoric ruins of the Aztec cliff dwellings in the Verde valley. near Champ Verde, Ariz., found a partially crumbled wall. She tore away 1 part of it and this disclosed behind | it chamber that had once been the home 1 of an Aztec She crawled into the cham | Der and there she found two mummies in | a sitting posture with their backs to a wall of rock and their knees doubled up | to their chins.
 l Near the two mummies were two earth en jars known as ''ollas." In one of those l jars she found. among other things. a handful of beans resembling verys closely | in shape and other characteristics the ordinary lima bean of commerce. The remarkable thing about these beans was their size. They were nearly three times as large as the largest lima bean.
 Miss Hall intrusted all the beans she had found to farmer of her acquaint- ance near Champ Verde to plant for her He planted them carefully in we'll cul-
 tivated plot of ground and he fenced them
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

chest higher
 Down at the corner of U street sev- eral newsboys were selling the evening papers. AS a side issue, they asked ev- cry cigarette smoker who passed if he had any baseball players. The stock holder stopped to get paper and was about to pass on, when thin voice questioned:
 Mister. have you got any baseball players?"
 The man looked down at the news. boy with a smile
 You can just bet your life we have, kiddoW he exclaimed, and passed on, leaving a-puzzled newsboy behind him.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

try MT. Kemper obtained his one bean from a friend in Arizona, and he sent 1t by registered mail to the man who man ages his farm in Jefferson county, with elaborate instructions how to plant and cultivate it. He had letter from the man last week saying that the bean was up and thriving.
 This new variety of bean is said to ex- eel the lima bean In solidity of 6xture and flavor. It's great value lies in the fact that it grows to perfection In dry land, requiring very little moisture.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
You Can't Beat the

It saves you money; it insures your ir satisfied feeling. Therefore, if any one asl motive.
 If you can t call, write.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14
Is Pounded on the Quali1
 the Pianos That We Se

And which busness first provide the greatest onor quality These statements  the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1912-07-14

We determined make our temporary quarters 1921 First compsh at o'clock Monday SALE We this time show exhibit of 1912 and 1913 shipped this We during this and some offering special line of high SAMPLE Pianos safely children