davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daily Missoulian., 1912-08-05

| could stand the gasping summer II
my memory were dead. Were my rec
II objection dumbcr I'd be
BOYHOOD cooler. but instea Il.
MEMORIES through the sweat my
I eyes hedimmng comes
the tantalizing thought, of the fun we
had In swimming when the summer
got too hot. Say. I'd give lot by
cracky. jus, to try II once again. Here
/ | sit n hired lackey painting In
cooped-up pen; baking. sweating in a
swelter. roasting in the fearful heat.
rushing, roaring helter- skclter Just To
earn a bite to eat. I'm fool to
write this Jingle when might just
disappear, hic me to the nearest dingla
dive IN where the waters clear. !
know where the swimming hole Is,
deep aud dark aud sweetly cool. Even
now that's where my soul is. just as
when | went to school. How | rushed
to he the first in, how | splashed and
laughed In glcc. oh. my heart is
fairly hnrstin' for the FUN that used
To be. Yes, I'd stand the gasping SUM-
mer " my memory were dead Were
my recollection dumber I'd he cooler.
but instead. through the sweat my
eyes bedimming comes the tantalizlng
thought. of the fun We had In swim.
ming when the summer got too hot.
\ visitor In the office the other even
ing was rcminiscing n little about the
time when he was a
RIGHT ON small boy and carried
THE DOT messages at night for
the Western Union
Telegraph company "onc evening |
got u message to deliver" said the
visitor, and when | arrived Mt tho
house was confronted by dog, who
had me scared To death. II took me
about an hour to get up to the house
and all the time that dog was carrying
on as II he intended to tear q leg off
Finally | got M Ia the door and
knocked The man thought II was
somc stall To- get him ont Of the house
convince him that was really a mes
songcr boy. | couldn't leave the mes
sage because there was 40 cents due
nn II Finally he opened the door and
took the telegram. All this time | had
one eve on the dog. who had the whole !
noighhorhood awake. Suddenly the |
man came back ont and handed me |
the message. I read IT, II said Have I
""r"ossod dog TODAY That's the dog
said the man. In view NJ the fact that /
IL took the company two days to get
the message to him. didn't insist on
that io-cent payment"
The Daily Missoulian., 1912-08-05

while speaking Of rcal excitement and
healthful exercise don't overlook the
The Daily Missoulian., 1912-08-05

iH' man who rises early on these
GEAR, summer MORNINGS and mo wl,oso
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
THE ROMANCE FADED
Piafn-Spoken Husband Came to the
Point With Few Words of
UnvarAishea Truth.

congressman Jim Mann was on his
stay back from Chicago, and Couldn't
help hearing the conversation OF the
touple in The section right behind
Ills. They Iooked like newly mxrnied
aalks. says Mackss National Monthly,
Out @er. not on their honeymoon, as
Mann harmed by deduction. Tine
woman 3aid doHn IA Newspaper she
had been reading and said TO her Nus
band:
DO you know. II wish | had one
of these safiinties ooh, think 1T
would be just grasB4i to sit on "A rock
with somebody AMI have him rave
about the incompatible golden ,cdtor
of my hair and tel me that MY eyes
We're the most beautiful in tlfe Mirele
world, and
'Uh, huh" said the husband, yawn-
ing.
And that the delicate pirfk of my
cheeks had been painted there by the
angels. anti that he couldn't H1ve with
out me. Ueoh. i think an affinity like
that would be-
"3Tisntt an affinity you want,-' in
terrupted her husband Whit you
seem tn want is plain, old4Sa#tioned
liar"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Joke ON the Doctor

The physicians in MaRkHfo thad
agreed that during their Chautauqua
assembly they would employ rcalI
boy, and each was to pay his share
of the expense This boy WINS ito call
any doctor VIM was wanted, without
disturbing the speaker, as 5t was EN-.
barrassing 10 him and looked as If
they We're doi1ig 1t TO advertise with.
ont expense. SO 1t all went well until
the afternoon when Strickland w. Gil
liiand spoke. AS he was talking away
a certain docaor had call flUm the
platform. and he walked oTn rather
ostentatiousfy. Some of the people
who knew of the arrangement laughed
or snickered. and the speaker got It.
He said. Don't laugh, folks. That is
the way my brother got tfs start"
And everybody ROarad
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

The !rhubarb pie, as
dome Of arconscientious woniaa.. 'ne
distinct impulse toward a better and
more efffeient7 bife. Properly made
with the dover crust just as flaky as
the top one, and with the pieces OF
1hubarb sort Of halfway preserved in
addelicious sirupS juice, SO that when
a piece is cut the juice oozes out into
the dish and thererust dips into 1t and
becomes affiliated with it, then rhu-
barb pie. Is just about as good as real
apple pie. In those circumstances 1t
well merits the honest old name of
Frhubarb:"
But the rhubarb pie of commerce.!
"A juiceless. tasteless. hopeless, greeny-
grayish compound between two paste
eoardsi 1t tastes more like grass
than rhubarb. 1T ruins the digestion.
1t blasts the hope and 1t sears the soul
with scornful meditation
And to heap insult upon injury, 1t Is
usually billed as home made"
We are becoming nation of eaters
away-from-home, and Americas ons
purely national Institution, pie, is laps
ing into desuetude. Alas!
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
DAlNTIEsT of TABLE LINEN
Most Elaborate and Expensive Ia
That In Use In Partisan
Establishments.

Table linen lin Paris today Is OF the
most elaborate and expensive descrip-
ton. Teacloths are made almost en-
tireiy of lace composed of squares
with insertions of finest embroidery,
and serviettes and napkins must also
match the cloth Another expensive
habit is to have all the crystals in
colored Bohemian cut glass to match
the hue of the hostess AFTERNOON
toilet
At recent reception given by a
society leader harmony of color was
very successfully carried out. Plates,
glasses and deeanters were OF pink
cut crystal, while the Lady of the house
wore teagown of rosecolored nous
seine de soie The color scheme was
also preserved in the flowers on the
table. and long-stemmed pink roses
were everywhere about the room.
A wealthy host the other day, ac-
cording to the Cri de Paris. prepared
q surprise for his guests by an eiab-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Cultivate Neatnass

Tfdiness is one of the most attrac-
tive of feminine qualities. 1t is also
one of the rarest. Early and persistent
must be the training which carries
the girl into womanhood with her
bump of neatness' well developed.
Unless inherently fastidious during
school days, she is liable to drift into
careless habits which she never out
grows.
One girl may have trick of leaving
shoes about her room. AS a child she
was permitted to do this, and as she
grew older the untidy custom was
never abandoned. for the simple rea.
son that she herself did not notice
anything unusual about 1t, and prob
ably nobod: else took the trouble to
correct her. Another slovenly habit Is
leaving bunch of combings in the
comb or on the dressing table Con
slant vigilance on a womans part is
necessary in these small matters If
she would be thought really tidy.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Lambs Tenure Of Life Not Long.

A parity of privileged sightseers
we're admitted to private view OLA
meuaserie Between performances.
and among other things we're shown
rlhat was called a Happy Family
that is to say, in one and the same
case there was a toothless lion, a
tiger, somewhat the worse for wear,
aBd IA half-famished wolf 7 ,side
these wild animals, curled up IN one
CORNER. Was diminutiFe lamb which
sShivered as it slnmbered.
fHow long have the animals lived
together asked one of the party
About twelve MONTHS replied the
Snowman
why" exclaimed a lady, ~ am
sure that little lamb Is not rs old as
that"
oh" said the Snowman, quite I'M
moved, the lamb has to be renewed
occasionally"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Grey wolfe with a silk stripe made
up over satin forms this dainty dress
1t has the skirt just :eased into the
waist-band and faced up at the foot
by a piece of the material, which Is
piped at theetop, with ,oerise satin.
The bodice also has a lace yoke
piped and trimmed on the shoulders
with buttons and loops, these also
trim the over-sleeves, while the under
ones are of the lace. Black satin rib
bon encircles the waist, bows and
ends are arranged at the left side of
front.
Materials required: 81 yards voile
40 inches wide, 31s yards satin 40
inches wide. Il yard cerise satin on
the cross. g. yard lace IS inches wide.
2yyards satin ribbon.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Nos IN COLOR tHARMoNIEs
Modistss tFsa .sN-...,,..
gits,ss rptst..ccIEaeved Really Elk
neS.s e-eGAh the
Materials This cSeason

The S1it1tletycot theooolor harmonies
of fabrics, COMMUNICATIVE multi-col.
ored emhYoitteries rlof the evening
gowns. are quite sensational this sea.
son. Take, for instance, two shades
OF soft gray chiffon smarquisette. 1t
Is wonderful whatf effect can be Great
ed by the gracefnlddraping. Then an
emerald green rtrlker over jeweled en-
proldered sat1n, whi6he was shown at
recent exhibition, had a suggestion
of Tftania's sossamer draperies. An.
other gown suggestive OF mystery and
the East was IN sapphire blue ninon.
opening over a side panel of embroid-
cred Parma violet silk.
A regal white satin and diamond
evening gown, with narrow lace
trimmed train, which had black note
in the velvet bow at theywaist and tall
feather headdress, was very striking.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
THE SAFE LAXATIVE
FOR ELDERLY PEOPLE

Most elderly people are more or |
less troubled with chronic, per-
sistent constipation, due largely to |
lack OF sufficient exercise. They ex-
perience difficulty in digesting even
light rood, with consequent belching |
If stomach gases, drowsiness after
eating, headache and feeling OF iassi-
tude and general discomfort
Doctors advise against cath&rtics and
violent purgatfves Of every kind, rec /
ommending a mild, gentle laxative /
tonic, like DE-. Caldwell's Syrup PepSiR,
entire system. 'sturping ms
DR.. GaldwelEs Syrup PPepsims ist ltaI
perfect laxative, easy idn action, c Ger
tain in effect and, withal ,ppleasant t,
the taste. 1T possesses tonic proper
ties that strengthen the stomach !! live
and bowels and is a remedy that ha
been for years the great sstandby Ii
thousands of families, and should b,
in every family medicine echest. dtli
equally as valuable for children as, TO
older people.
Druggists everywhere sell DIR. Cald
wells Syrup Pepsin in Soc and $1.ot
bottles. If you have never tried 4
send your name and address ito DR. w
B. Caldwell, 201 Washington st, Mon
tieello. Ill., and he will be very gladrtt
send a sample bottle for trial.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

different Is aftection! The simple
minded are always natural; they are
at the same time original. The af-
fected are never natural. Az for orig
inality, il they ever had 1t, they have
crushed IT bdt and buried II from sight
utterly. :.3se yourself. To attempt to
be anybody else is worse than folly.
IT is iitiBossible to attain 1T. A genu-
Inc cent Is worth more than a counter
felt Cfbllar. and the SMALLEST person
who lis real, is worth more than the
biggest fraud in existence. Let the
fabric of your character, though ever
SO humble, be at feast real.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Snowman.


man in North Carolina who was
saved from conviction for horse steal
ing by the powerful plea of his law
yer, after his acquittal by the jury.
was asked by tile lawyer.
Honor bright, now. Bill. you did
steal that horse didn't your
Now. look a-here, judge, Was the
reply. Il alters did think I stole that
boss, but since ! hearn your speech to
that ere jury, I'll be doggoned if /
amt got my doubts about INA
tional Monthly.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Novel and Useful c,oc.k.

Among curious clock novelties is the
shadow boudoir clock. With it there
Is no need Of getting up to strike a
light or turn on the bulb All that is
necessary is to touch button and the
time is flashed on the wall, after the
same fashion that signs are flashed on
the sidewalk. When the owner of the
clock goes to bed he turns a night dial
to the ceiling and when he presses a
bulb the electric light reflects from
the dial through the lens and appears,
giving the correct time in shadow on
the ceiling.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

table Compound. My husband said it
would restore my health and it has. -
Mrs. MAY WYATT, Ashland, KY.
There are probably hundreds of thou
sands of women in the United States
who have been benefited by this famous
old remedy; which was produced from
roots and herbs over thirty years ago by
q woman to relieve woman's suffering.
Read What Another Woman says:
Camden, N. 1T had female trou-
bic and serious displacement and was
tired and discouraged and unableto do my
work. My doctors told me never could
be cured without an operation, but
thanks to Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound am cured of that affliction
and have recommended it to more than
one of my friends with the best results. +"
Mrs. ELLA JOHNSTON, 324 Vine St
IL you want special advice write to
LYDIA Z. Pinkham Medicine Co. (cOnfl-
deutiai) Lynn, Mass. -Four letter will
be opened, read and answered by q
Weinan and held In strict confidence.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

We seen dramatic incidents
In shows that cost me thirty cents
And shows that cost one-and- a-half;
Some made me weep. some made me
laugh.
I've seen the villain slammed In jail
Without a friend to go his bail.
And when the act was DONE somehow,
Come out of jail and make his bowl
I've seen the pale young heroine
Who had escaped the lures of sin
And saved her poor old fathers Eide
While all were watching, tearful-eyed-
I've seen her leap from a high cliff
And heard the bass drum go ker-bff!
Then up the curtain came. and she
Bowed calmly there for all to see,
i've seen the hero say farewell
And stop a moment Just to tell
How far away he meant to go
To win some wealth and fame, you know.
I've seen him leave the old Nome place
While tears were running down each
face
And In A minute he returned
To ''tA4se the CALI for which he yearned.
Btit. best of all saw last week
TIE incident of which I'll speak.
Foor ShakespeAre's work was being
done
The curtain quickly down was run:
Then up. and to the cheering crowd
J. Caesars corpse got up and bowed,
And then lay down and died some more
zen got up for an encore!
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Physicians Recommend CastOria

AST0RIA has with pronounced favor the part physicians phama
cucal societies and medical authorities used by physicians with
results gratifying The extended of Casto is unquesnaby the
result Of three c hThe ndisputabe evidence that it harmless:
not only ys stomach pains and qets the but assm
@ the food @ is agreeable and perfect substitute for Castor Oil
absolutely SAFE It does contain any Opium Morphine other narcotic
and does not u unlike Soothing Sups Bamans Drops Godaes
Cordial This is good deal for Medical Journal Our duty how
expose danger and record the advancing health The day
for poisoning innocent children through greed ignorance ought to end To
knowledge Casto remedy which produces and health by
regulating the by Supplying and readers entitled to
the Journal
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

me and finally the stone itself, partly
dissolved, but still as big as a pea
With 1t disappeared all symptoms OF
dizziness, rheumatism and headache
i nave gained about so pounds since
and feel well and hearty"
when Your Back Is Lame, Remember
the Name-DOAN'S," SOC. all stores
Foster-Milburn Co, Buffalo, N. Y.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
A Kindly Jest.

Where is the pager" asked the
king of the royal chamberlain.
Sire. he is missing so much that
he seemeth like a flyleaf"
aye. by my rood" roared his roy.
al highness. ''he is not only a blank
page. but he is blankety blank
page!"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
The Dear Girls.

Miss Te1lit-Susie Anteek says, that
young Rimer. the poet. has written,
some verses entitled Lines to Sasie,s
Eyes"
Miss Sezzit-Well, don't call 1t
very kind of him to draw attention to
her crows feet.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
No NoveltY.

People are queer
i have heard rumors to that eff
feet"
Frequently they pay money to go
to theaters for the purpose of seeing
ballet dancers walk around on their
toes when women are doing the same
thing in the streets all the time
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
When Your Ewes Need Care

Try Murine Eye Renady. No Smartine-Feels
FIne-Acts Quickly. Try II for Red, Weak,
Watery Eyes and Granulated Eyelids Illus
trated Book In eak=h Package. Murine is
compounded by our Ooutists moi "PatanI Med
icine'-but used In a1ooeAsful physiclans' f'rne-
ice for many yeara. New dedicated 70 the faiib-
lie and sold BY Druggists nj Csc and 5oc per Bottle
Murine Eye saiVe In AEeptic Tubes, &c and h0c.
Murine Eye Remedy Co.. Chicago
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Thu storlsd Castle.

You had better make It 10 stories
higher" said good King Arthur to the
royal architect
What is the use?" queried the lat.
ter.
"0ds boddikins and gadzooks, Gait
If. Know We not that the men of the
future will have to have a stored cas-
tie to write about?"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Her ADVANTAGE

Il should think Buggs made things
very uncomfortable for his wife when
be has a habit of storming all over
the house"
What need she care how he storms,
as long as she is reigning in it,"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Motorists, Lunch Boy

A toy trunk makes an inexpensive
and practical lunch box for motorists.
II win hold enough for several meals,
and the tray can be used for napkins
and small silver.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

The woman who cares for a clean.
wholesome mouth, and sweet breath,
will find Paxtine Antiseptic a Joy for
ever. At druggists. 25c box or sent
postpaid on receipt of price by The
Paxton Toilet Co., Boston, Mass.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
A Quarter Century

Before the public. Over Five Million Free
Samples given away each year. The con-
slant and increasing sales from samples
proves the genuine merit of Aliens Foot :
Ease, the antiseptic powder to be shaken
into the shoes for Tired, Aching, Swollen
Tender feet. Sample free. Address, Allen
5. Olmsted, lie Roy. n Y.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
His Pose.

Mrs. Hewligus, what is your hus-
bands attitude ON the woman suffrage
question:
One foot in the air, of course, He's
one of the chronic kiekers''
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
WIFE'S HEALTH
RESTORED
Husband Declared Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound Would Re-
store Her Health,
And 1t Did.
Ashland, KY. -" Four years ago /
seemed to have everything the matter

with me. I had fe-
maleand kidney trou-
BILE and was so bad off
/ could hardly rest
day or night. / doc
tored with all the
best doctors in town
and took many kinds
of medicine but moth
ing did any good un-
til | tried your won-
derful remedy, Lydia
E. Pinkham's Vege-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

crate sea fantasy" built UP as a taI
BILE center. with shrimps and tiny cells
swimming about in the miniature
ocean.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Mrs. Windows Soothing Syrup for Children
eeething, softens the gums, reduces lnhamma-
tion, allays pain. cures wind collie 25c a bottle.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Ask nothing but what is right sub
NIT to nothing wrong.-Andrew Jack.
son.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
Lots of It.

They say mans wife often makes
him. but Bingles wife will never be
able to put any push In that man"
Just you wait until she gets a
lawn-mower in his hands,
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

The meanest trick a bachelor can
play on leap year girl is to promise
to be a brother to her
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

A long Grafton goes lame on the
stretch
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Keep your fears to yourself. but
share your courage with others.-R
L. Stevenson.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
A Hot Retort.

Deacon Scrouge-No. parson, I
don't rightly think we ought to give
you a vacation. You know. the devil
never takes one.
Parson Snappeigh-He would. dee-
con. II you didn't keep him so busy.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Garfield Ten helps humanity the world
over Taken for liver and kidney
troubles, billiousnes6 and constipation.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Discriminating persons should know
that Garfield Tea is a uniquely efficient
remedy forliver troubles and costiveness.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Which wins? Garfield Tea always wins
on its meritsas the best ofherb catharties.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

A woman Is proud of the virtues.
that she practices because she has to-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Pessimists may be men who are dis
appointed in themselves.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
For. the Young Girls Eye.

There is nothing more beautiful
than simplicity of character 1t is
honest. frank and attractive. How
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Sympathy gives no one license to
pry into ones secrets,
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

ing SO bad, l knew
there must be anoth-
er stone that would
have to be cut out. /
decided to try Doan's
Kidney Pills and the
kidney action i'm
proved right away.
Large quantities OF
sediment and stone
Darticles nassed from
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

The man who makes light of Others
seldom sets the world ON fire.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

There's music in the squat of
baby--to its mother
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

Patience Is but WING b ana..-.s,-I.-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21
COT TO THE CAUSE.
And Then All symptoms of Kidney
Trouble Vanished.

G. ]. Hammonds, Ills e. First St.,
Fort Scott, Kans., says: 81 was operat-
ed on for stone in the kidney but not
cured and some time after, was feel.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

w. N. u. Salt Lake City. Mo. ss-Is12
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1912-06-21

N<&@--A1eeG1