The Washington times., 1912-11-30

sncub WIFI IOTtIyWQ0 0u0 0l8mIys
ssh.1 ss Sys sly ss'S srsS sw n:4s., s
proudly up. WAS Il my fault that I
was born with beauty that demanded
lts duet" :wassl 20 blams that my
that my Imagination was, always on
nrs3 But was and. stiil am instinctive-
Oh! YOU may snesr. but It = trne. AZ.
though as . giri I was starving for
substitute and you can't resiise how
incessantiy the latter was offered me-
Wherever I vent Mas prosecuted by
Il. At times I had horrible fear. that
desire was all that ! was capable Of
ncA INV misery. rGu povsr,y w%s% ~ and S disSrass
hailed you a. my kine-iny man! be-
lieved that you were offering me love
% great that II welcomed the sacrince
Of every minor consideration. II never
ask me for myself. my life. my future.
unless you were able to give me IN
exchange something more than the
mere luxuries Of existence"
...! also offered YOU my n,., iifeI rim
sYou offered up your life not TO me:
but to your own miserable conception OF
chivalry! The greatness Of your eacri.
nee intoxicated you. and consequently W
seemed to you inevitable snst !,s ! ~" I"
humble % Contemplation Of yoIr sublime
.s,,s sG ,a:; ss,.s,:S nsss; occurred to me-"
"Oh, you never presented 20 20
seii-conscious TO be introspective. and
are actually proud Of the fact that YOU
meyer stop to analyze either yoursen
your mSt'ys. ,. 'nSSs sS ySs ,Ss slsnsss issst
rsaiisinE what are the influencss.
which shape actions. You fancy that
you are not self.centered because
you are too shy. yes. and too yain INTO 70
heart. You Imagine that you are un-
selfish because you make daily sacri:
aces TO your own ideal q conauet;
sSSmersins i,I H ' of Your Identity n az
others, you have never had even the
vsguest conception. ....... -.......--
"When you married me IT never oc-
Cured to you that had scddnhr.rsnsion the sisnt 70
You, the ideallst, expected me to be
satisfied with the material advantages
you offered. but had ]. the degraded
creature you take me to be. known the
truth, would never have consented to
sell my birthright for mess Of pot
"That sounds all very hne. and I
confess ! may not. have been z perfeet
Sos SSsHSnS saSs DONE e Il % had not no. married you.
"pone? i would have worked and
hoped. and II work had failed me.
would have begged and I hoped; a.. ndHO;na l SO%M
the hope that some day should find
the man who was destined for me;
When ] at last realised that you DID
not love me you cannot imasine my
efforts to please you. but the very In
exercising those arts and artihces
which might have brought you to my
SO great that It sealed my lips and
made you find me q dull companion."
Il never thought you dull. You know
very we'll that II was not that which
aiienated me from You. When ] married
In love with y9u.- but I was certainly
fond OF you. and II you had behaved
yourself ] should no doubt In time have
become more closely united TO you. You
nc. Nice. effective word. that: ! must
add It to my vocabulary. But YOU
choose a strange means Of gaining my
affection when you took to diagracing
%ss both prvassy nnd SIsS
transfigured her slowly faded from
Amys face. leaving II drawn and cold: I:
and her. voice. when she spoke. sounded
indehnably weary.
lukewarm affection was all you would
ever feel for me I lost hope and. In los
ing hope. lost my foothold on life. i
wanted to die-I determined to die.
Time and again ! pressed your pistol
,, than my will always prevented me from
pulling the. trigger; and. finally. |
sought forgetfulness In drink because I
have not the courage TO find 1t in death.
At first tried to hide my condition
when tho sight OF your bland seif-sstis-
faction became unbearable: when your
absolute unconsci0usness Of the havoc
You had made OF my life maddened me.
I wanted you to suffer! on. not as !
that; but. at any rate. could hurt your
vanity and deal l death-blow to your
pride! You had dlsgraced me when you
tr!ckea me into giving myself to = man
disgrace by .reeling through the public
she cried with indescribabie bitterness.
When ] say you grow pale with
T"t" supp1:s e" you ss%S,e hs x'
morse and Humiliation? | swear tina.
never for moment have I, .regretted
ss so9rss sseans shSs S es s'sSmes sS. Of
age to xiii myself. Drink? bless It
How l welcomed the gradual deadenins
Of my senyes-the dul1ing Of my fevered
| brain. When awoke from my long
torpor and found myself at Cnariefoi
l cursed the doctor who had brought
me back to life. Little by little the old
agony returned: The. thought Of you
haunted me day and night. while a
raging thirst racked my body. and from
this two-fold torture .the constant su-
pervisiOn of the nurses prevented me
from obtaining even temporary re-
| spite. 1t was hcll!'
| For a minute Cyril felt a wave Of pity
sweep over him. but suddenly he stif.
You forgot to mention that consola.
ti0n was offered YOU"
| Consolation Had found that,
should not be here. ! admit, however
that when I first, noticed that M. d.
| Brissac was attracted by me ] wal
mildly pleased. II was q solace to my
wounded vanity to find that some ons
still found me desirable. But ] sweal
| that 1t never occurred to me to give
myself to him TIL the doctor told mt
that you were coming to take me ava!
with you. See, you again! Subject my
self anew TO your Indifference. you
means OF cscapins, from YOU which. Of
fer"d itself. And I am glad. glad tia
flung myself into the mire, for b,
det.ing love | killed II. ! am at las
free from the obsession which has \beeI
the torment Of my life. Neither> yO,
nor any other man will again fire IN,