The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1912-04-20
III e A X ID
BY
r u B e

IN addition to keeping their eye on
the Gary aldermen who want to make
a park" on their lake front the good
people of Miller had better nail down
the scenery as well as the sidewalks.
WITHOUT doubt the New aoik girl
who issued 1000 invitations and then
was welded in advance before just two
witnesses certainly displayed some SEN
sible qualities. When the preachers de-
mand that a wedding be less of
vaudeville affair we will consider pro-
posals from girls with $4,000 and
more) living in Hobart. Crown Point,
Turkey Creek. Now don't all write at
once
SCIENTIST has invented a machine
to weigh the earth, we read. 1t ought
not to be permitted to be used until the
Gary city sealer looks 1t over.
ALMOST time for Laporte or South
Bend TO be breaking into print with
story about the peach crop being killed
by the frost.
GEE, 1t must make the mouths of
those st. John township farmers water
when they read that some Gary men
have mortgaged 100 acres for q paltry
$4,000.
AS far as we can figure it out poor
old Captain Smith died as follows: /.
Went down with the ship. 2. Shot him
self 5. Went down standing on the
bridge. 4. Jumped overheard.
WHILE our county may be making
progress and our millionaires are get
ting divorces, none of our women folk
has attained the distinction of having
social secretary.
SOME day these little telephone list
eners will learn that listening on the
line is in the same class as opening a
letter that is for some one else.
AS yet we haven't heard anything
from the suffragettes as to equal rights
for the men when lifeboats are being
filed.
GOLD has been found in Pennsyl-
vania coal. The way tho black stun is
being priced leads us to wonder wheth-
er 1t wasn't meant that coal was found
In the gold.
THEY are enforcing the smoke or
dfnance so. strictly in Chicago that they
arrest drivers of smoking autos Now
II some of the campaign stogie smokers
were nabbed the crusade would certain
| ly be good one.
THEN again IL that scientist ever
weighed the earth while Tom Knots
and Judge Mcmahon of Hammond were
up In an aeroplane for private confer
ence the tonnage would be considerably
displaced.
| IN the crush of steamship news we
haven't had time to kick over the
traces because the soft coal strike has
been settled and an agreement has
been signed up for two years. How
ever. but your prices don't take any
heavy downward plunges.
WORD comes that 900. 900 people ir
| London are among the class of two
room jewellers. Rents along the Thame.
must be something like they are along
the Grand Calumet near Broadway.
FOR the time being the poor ole
Mexican rebellion. West Hammond.
troubles. and the Baldwin Locomotiv,
works will have to be contented witt
the next to the last page. Even Gov
ernor Marshalrs announcement that h.
has some new bombs to spring in tbs
Gary bribery cases fails to get NOR,
than a single column head
A HOLY smokel S. N. again and not
, bit of wool soap in the house
: MAYOR DARROw'S CASE POST
PONED." news headlines. Is 1t possibi
that Laporte getting jealous Of Gary
TEN days from now the Titanic stor,
will be relegated to the inside pages
! there won't be much about It, an
, there'u be new news to interest you
You'll forget all about the disaster an
you will think of it about as often a
you do of the Spanish war; The worl
is nothing more than an audienc
} watching news being recled off at
, high speed rate.