Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1912-01-25
The Argus Daily Story
Bristors Dyspeptic Piggy Clarissa Maehe
Copyrighted. Associated Literary Bureau.

Inc sun SQOue uOWu Ou rEduk DIS
tolls model farm, but there was no
sunshine in the heart Of its owner, nor
did there appear to be gladness in the
soul of the owners pig. That stout,
black bristled beast lay inertly on a
bed of clean straw against the clean
wall of its scientifically built cement
pen.
The model farmer sat on the top Of
the cement wall watching his black
pig with anxious eyes. The pig had
been lying there since morning, scarce
~ noticing the trough full Of sweet
milk and potato parings that Bristors
housekeeper had reluctantly placed
there.
Sweet milk's too good for pigs. Mr..
Bristol" Ann Dangler had said as
sharply as she dared.
Sweet food makes sweet pork" re-
piled the model farmer coolly, and Ann
had tossed her head and returned to
her kitchen to bang the pots and ket-
ties about.
sit looks as If it was going to make
dead pork this time" she grumbled.
! Quite regardless of Ann DANGERS
! opinions, Frank Bristol continued to
sit ON the wall Of his pigpen and con-
template the PROSTATE form Of its soil
| tary occupant. He was handsome
pig, sleek and clean, as beftted a pig
| living in a scientifically built and clean
| " pen. But he was ailing. For two
| days he had moped around the pen
| and refused to eat of the delicious
food set forth by the highly scandal
ICED housekeeper.
"Its indigestion" concluded the
model farmer, again consulting the
farm manual issued by his alma mater
the agricultural college he attended.
This book says to compel the ami
NAL to take exercise-prod it with a
stick until it runs violently around
its Enclosure. This mode Of treat
ment, combined with feeding Of thin
cruel, formed Of two parts of white
cornmeal to one part Of skimmilk, will
soon restore the pig to normal health
Hum! I guess I'll go and tell Ann to
make the Cruel"
Make cruel for a sick pig-neverw
cried Ann Dangler when Mr.. Bristol
mildly made this suggestion, waving
the farm manual as authority.
why not, AnnT"
Because it's all nonsense. Leave
him alone, Mr.. Bristol, and he'll be
all right. He's too clean TO be real
healthy. Why, pigs has been raised
for years and years in all kinds OF
pens, and I never heard Of one being
sick before This ones took cold from
your turning the hose ON him the other
day"
IF you'll have the Cruel ready at
4 o'clock I'll come in for it," was Mr..
BristoI's reply to this pointed ha-
rangue.
When she was alone Ann DANGER
meekly stirred the fire and set on a
kettle of skinned milk. That was al
ways the way these arguments with
Frank Bristol ended. 1t was apparent
that there was room for only one
boss" on the model farm.
Meanwhile Bristol had provided him
self with the necessary prod in the
shape of a boathook and had made
his way to the pigpen.
The animal was breathing heavily
now and then grunting bass note.
Frank Bristol opened the patent
gate and stepped inside, closing the
gate behind him. He went up be.
hind the unsuspecting porker and prod
ded him gently with the sharp end
Of the boathook-
With an astonished squeal the pig
bounded from his bed and ran to the
farther corner of the pen.
What are you doing in there?" de
manded a nasal voice.
Bristol turned around. "Ah, Mr.
Daley, how are you today"
pretty fair. Don't seem to be moth
ing the matter with your pig"
I'm forcing him to take little ex'
ercise," said Bristol, once more 1ab.
bling the pig with the boat hook and
sidestepping as the animal raced
around the pen. Hes got bad case
of indigestion, and I'm trying to cure
it."
Ben Daley opened a capacious mouth
and roared. "Who ever heard of pie
having Indigestion" he questioned be
tween roars. IF he's RELY sick, Mr.
Bristol, you better make him up mess
Of hog fennel and make him drink 1T
That'll do him more good than running
! around like that. Hawgs waren't ere
ated to take vi'lent exercise. Tain
their natur' so to do"
seems-to-take-to - it
pretty-naturaliy" puffed Bristol, al
he lodged to and fro. getting in jabs a
, the Infatuated pig.
"You mark my words, young man
you'll have that there pig chasing yoJ
; before long, was Ben Daley's ominoul
! parting when be went
Frank Bristol had realized this al
ready Whatever had been the matte
: with mis- pet pig. the animal had ap
peared to have recovered from the NAL
ady with unexpected rapidity and, tr.
as he might. the model farmer coult
? not escape from the path OF the cha Z 3
ing beast long enough to unfasten tn
patent gate and get out of the pen.
/ Now and then the race around tn
| Enclosure reached stage when Fran
{ Bristol was in pursuit of the pig bu
{ that was when the pig fell behind
little. Once Frank turned and yelle
| % h. IL