davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02

The reader was given to understand
that Curtis Joined with and followed
the leadership of Aldrich, Guggen-
helm, Penrose and other socalled re
actionaries' Curtis was sometimes
with these people. So was BrlstoW.
In the vote ousting Lorimer, Gurus
and BristoA were together ana OPP
posed to GuggenheiIn and Penrose-
Those who have followed the re-
cent controversies cannot help but De
interested in the stand of the oppo-
sition which propose sto condemn anu
destroy him anyway, no matter now
he voted and no matter what good
he has done in the position with
which he has been honored.
All of this reminds one of Aesop s
fable of 1.-THE Wolf and the Lamb;
A Hungry Wolf one day saw Lamb
drinking at a stream, and Wlsneo tC
frame some plausible excuse for making
him his prey. What do you ne4 ~
bv muddling the water 1 am going 10
drink?'' fiercely said he to the Lamb;
.sPray forgive me-" meekly answered
the Lamb; st should be sorry IN any
way to displease you, but as the sCreAi ii
runs from you toward me, you VIII -
see that such cannot be the case.
That's all very WE'LL said the Won
..but YOU know you spoke i'll OF ms
behind my back year ago." Nay be-
lieye me- replied the Lamb, was
not then born TT must nave peen
vour brother, then" growled the Wol1:
TT cannot have been, for I never mac
any" answered the Lamb. know II
was one of your lot rejoined the
Wolf 80 make no more such ldle Elk
,uses' He then seized the poor Lamp
.arried him off to the woods, ana atS
,im. But before he died he gaspedi
out, "Any excuse will serve tyrant'
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

[From the Chicago News1
Self-made men sometimes need a lot Of
alterations.
Uneasy lies the head that wears no hair
in fly time.
The gas meter has more feet than any
other animate object.
You may have noticed that thigh fly
ers" never display wings.
The target is never lacking IL a man has
money to throw at the birds.
Dancing would be awfuIly tiresome if IL
came under the head of work.
BY failing to do things you don't like
to do you will never accomplish much
The woman that interests a man most
is the one who will make him talk about
himself.
1t sometimes happens that when a man.;
wife dies he loses his only visible means
of support.
Every thing earth has its use, but it
is probably just as well that we dol t
know about some things
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
WILD CoREoPsIs.


Just a handful of wild coreopsis
That grew by a dusty highway,
Only this-but its presence has frightened
And sweetened the long summer day.
Would you know where to find the quaint
beauties7
Or when? They are fairest at morn;
And you'll find them down close to the
roadside,
Or fringing the great fields of corn.
As you single them out from the grasses,
And note their rich color and grace
4ou may Wonder-aS used to wonder
Why fill they SO lowly place.
o quaintest and fairest of blossoms,
Their tiny Hfe's secret I've guessed;
They We're placed at our feet by our
Father
And their Maker. our Father. knows
best.
He has chosen strange ways to remind US
Earthly joys and a heavenly crown
VIII be sweeter by far to the brave
hearts
Who will not only look up. but stoop
down.
Just a handful of wild coreopsis
That grew by dusty highway,
Only this-but life's lessons seem palmer,
And-Heaven seems nearer today.
-F1oy Schoonmaker Armstrong, in Ma
tional Magazine for July.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
HYHAWKER JOTS

A MUTT and Jeff" is one of the new
and popular soda fountain drinks at
Oakley.
A harvest note in the Alma signals:
Rynhold Richter cut his lower piece or
alfalfa last week. A muStache is ample
pl election against the elements through
July and August.
Who says the cost of living is high
in Kansas? A use for the grasshopper
has at last been found, and the people
of the short grass country viii Tor ever
more have food sufficient Last week
one of the Alton doctors was called to
the country to administer aid to sick
child of the age of six years. He found
that the patient had eaten an overdose
OF grasshoppers. 1t developed that the
child had been eating grasshoppers for
some time but on this occasion he had
taken one too many. He did not merely
bite off the head and suck the blood,
but ate wings. legs, body and all. If
a grasshopper is good to eat raw they
surely ought to good when picked.
Why not try a mess ?-Edmond New
Leaf.
Mean Old Plug is the title of this
prose poem by Arthur Riddle of the
Minneapolis Messenger: Us kids we
went a-swinmin' and we had a bully
time. The waters awful dirty and the
bottoms muddy slime, but geei that
doesn't matter to kids like us, you bet,
lot the DOLCOIn QOeSn anu the
waters good and wet. OF course we
don't wear bathin' suits or put on any
dog;it amt no natatorium-We dive off
of a log. But there's a rope a-swingin'
from the tallest of the trees, cause
'twouldn't be no swimmin' hole with
out a good trapeze. The mud it comes
in handy, even on the slip'ry-s1ides. or
keepin' kids from quittin' sooner than
the crowd decides. But say, a man
came yesterday and cussed us some
thin rank for our Outrageous conduct
runnin' nude along the bank" L told
my father bout him, and he says '"The
old killjoy! He merely has forgotten
that he ever was a boy" And mother
she's a good old scout-says Maybe
SO, but lam! He might at least remem-
her that he's a gentleman!"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
QUAKER MFDTTATToNs.

GFrom the Philadelphia Record.1
Lots of stolen sweets are merely sugar
coated.
The aeroplane should surely enable our
friends to look us up.
1t isn't defective sight that causes the
freckled girl to wear specks.
Probably the only schools they had In
the Dark Ages were knight schools.
Even the fellow who takes things as
they come may hate to let them go.
If man fails at being successful he
can at least succeed in being a failure
Man cannot add to his stature but tight
shoes will increase woman's signs.
Love may be blind. out where the en-
gagement ring is concerned it is never
stone blind.
Many a fellow has basked in the sum
shine OF girls smile until she has given
him a look that wilted him.
unto himself a wife" Henpeckke-..I
wish some fellow would take unto himself
mine"
No, Maude, dear; we have never heard
that when a young man is counting re
smokes strong cigars because they don't
break so easily in his pocket.
Virtue is its own reward" quoted the
Wise Guy. That's right" agreed the
Simple Mug. THE fatted calf would
gladly have changed places with the
prodigal SON.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02

Connie slipped from her horse and
knelt beside the form of her fance.
Phil, oh, Phil!' she cried brokenly
as she slipped a warm little palm under
his cheek and endeavored to turn his
face to hers.
at her in wide surprise. Stifhy ne
turned, rose to an elbow-a perIect.y
sound and good elbow. to CONNIE :
amazement-sat upright, stared again
at Connie, at Brown Ben and tneh
gazed around in startled fashion.
where's Nellybird?" he cried, jump
ing to his feet.
"Oh, are you all right?'' cried Con-
ME, standing beside him. you SEQ,
1 met your mare running away-ano
II thought wou were dead or nurI-
and so 1 came" She paused with
little break in her voice.
you came and found me napplns
beside the road-Nellybird must nave
become frightened and bolted. m
sorry, Connie-I hope you were no. no..
disappointed at finding me unhurt
He smiled rather wryly at this pretty
distant cousin.
Connie tried to smile. blinked and
suddenly began to cry softly. -,
Connie! You didn't care, did youz
he asked in a sharp whisper. "Of course
YOU wouldn't believe me if swore ina
I loved you and that your coldness Is
making me wretched-but, ah! CONNIE
do you care? Can you care Tor me
as much as love you?"
Connie found her answer wnen
their eyes met and what she salo
was perfectIy satisfactory to Phil Bar
ing Love had performed a bit OF
magic that June morning, for he hao
turned a plain bride path into rose
strewn bridal way.-(Copyright, 1917
by Associated Literary Press0
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
HUNOR or THE DRY

Does college education help a man q,
aIter llfe? Big leaguers seems to thirir
II makes a man quicker on the bases :"
LOUISVILLE Courfer-Journal.
How does this noted healer who cureu
his patients by touching them diner from .
regular physician?'' why he to,, ~ - !.
them before he cures them."-CleveIand
Plain Dealer. 9'o' ny
Waitress-Have another glass. sir9 I4uys
band (to his wife)-Shall I have another
glass, Friedrich Wife Ito her mother
snail he have another, mother?-Ffie-
gende Blaetter.
How do you like my dialect7p the
young author asked TT seems" replied
the publisher, "to be a mixture of Yankee
cowboy, Swede and plantation darky'
well, that's all right for Georgia story
isn't it?" Sure. '-Cleveland Plain Deal
er.
Mrs. Justin De Bunch>-Has your baby
learned to talk yet? Mrs. Al De Mustahd
No, and his nurse is so stupid that I'm
afraid he never will. But you must let
me show you new tricks / have taught
F'ido since you were here last. Play dead
Fido.-Milwaulee News.
Father ruefuIly gazed on his last quar-
ter. money has wings, and house rents
year-old boy scout son, land some houses
have wings. for I've seen many a house
fly" You're smarter than your old DAD,
maybe, my son. but always thought that
no part Of a house except the chimney
nue!'-F1z.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
says UNCLE CAV

The most unfortunate man ever
knew had fifty-seven varieties of spare
trousers, forty-three suits, a mean dis
position, and record of sixty years
unmarked by labor. He spent his time
wearing his clothes, inventing new
cocktails. boasting that he had never
done a days work and cussing his fell
low men.
When he arrived in Puckyhuddle,
bringing his doctor and his chef with
him. and reserved the entire second,
which was also the top, floor of the
Puckyhudd1e House, it didn't take us
natives long to get a line on him.
We came at once to the conclusion
that the man who doesn't work doesn't
belong.
He Immediately informed us of his
laborless career and after that nobody
wanted to associate with him except
Pook Scruggs,- the town loafer. He
wasn't exactly f1attered by Pook's at
tentions and he lamented the fact that
a simple people. living in bucolic
peace. didn't shine up to a man who
had searched the world over for just
such a spot in which to find rest and
friends. 1t was the same everywhere
he went he declared, in city or coun-
try, and the heartlessness of human
itY gTteVed MIN SOr61y. he Sa1Q we
didn't understand him. The fact is that
we did. although he didn't understand
u.s. and we didn't wonder that he found
the world a wilderness.
One day, in a fit of black loneliness
he wandered into the Office of the
'Puckyhuddle Pandex" and unburden-
ed himself to Ethelbert J. Watts, who
was editor, proprietor, advertising
manager, and foreman of the sheets
composing room.
eff you would chuck those fifty
seven pairs of pants and get a job
driving the bus or hike out across the
medder there and help old man Sprig-
gins get in his hay before the rain
comes, you'd be all right and solid
with u.s. Ethelbert told him as he
shifted his one gallus to a more COM.
Portable position. what you need is
work If you go to work you can
spend your evenings sitting around the
drug store telling the boys about them
pants of yours and get a hearin'."
That settled the matter. The visitor
took his fifty-seven pairs of pants. his
fOrty-three SUITS his cook, his doctor
and his mean disposition elsewhere.
But Watts told him the truth. incl
dentally enunciating a great principle
which applies with equal force IN
Puckyhuddle and New York, although
it is somewhat more respectable 70
loaf in the big town than in the little
one.-(Copyright. 1912. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
GLOBE SIGHTS
BY THE ATCHIsOg GLOBE.

A poorer workman than you are is apt
to be your worst critic.
Cheerfulness and pneumatic tires are
fine things until they blow up.
We are always able to feel bad enough
without the narrowing details.
One learns a little late that the old
oaken bucket was no sanitary system of
waterworks.
There would be less kicking on woman
doing a mans work If she would support
the man.
There is so much rudeness that people
are apt to wonder what a polite man
wants to sell.
Study most along the line that brinss
you your living. Let your hobby be your
business.
Sunrise might be as beautiful as sunset
if there were not a hard days work Just
ahead of 1t.
What has become of the old-fashioned
girl who Pined Away when her steady bs.
came unsteady?
You may have observed that the losers
have a good deal to say about the inter
ests of Clean Sport
Some one has said that heaven is a
place for those who have failed on earth
People say most anything, you will OBJ
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
by TIE WY
BY HARVEY PARsONA

Tt is our experience that the man
who spent 20 years of MS me on q
farm so blamed poor he couIon
raise the sights of a rifle on 1t. doesn
go back to farming after his first year
in town. He stays in town. IL IS the
| Retired farmer who wants 10 get packi
and the Retired farmer didn't retire
from poor farm.
Note: A lot. has been said about
the case of the colored jointist, who
was arrested by Sheriff Norton and
then escaped. 1t is bad form TO Joke
the affable sheriff about that incident.
We will bet weeks wages 1t is the
/ only prisoner who ever escaped from
the Colonel" Others will bet dang
sight more on the same propositlon'
as they have reliable records and m
formation to the effect that the col
ored gent in question is the only
Prisoner the Colonel has arrested DUR
| ing his four years in office.
We feel better now. Taft has ac-
cepted the nomination. Thus ends an
other one of the nerve wracking sus-
penses Of life.
Seeing the alligator is one of the
favorite forms of recreation among
farmers along the classic Smoky Hlii
river. But why cavil; at that II is
just as harmless as croquet, pitching
During the week, persons VINO ex-
pect to cash their opposition TO hlene
have been circulating the report that
he has promised all the jobs con-
nected with the sheriff's office. But
that isn't all They named one set OF
deputies while talking to liberal Vot-
ers and another set while spreading
the glad tidings among the other rae
ton. Kiene is almost hot about 1t.
II hot he 7ox nrOUId6E
a sheriff shall pay for his own help,
he will be unable to make enough out
of the office to pay the two complete
sets of deputies appointed by the
knockers.
Uncle Ike Stephenson of Wisconsin
and late of congress averts old age by
the use of aloes pills. Others escape
old age by dying young.
About the only explanation OF the
Arkansas City auto accident is that
the street car was trying to climb into
the bullmoose wagon.
A million dollar station is to be
erected in Los Angeles by the Santa
Fe. Hereafter, any tourist-who goes
over the Santa Fe-can point with
pride and say; See what We have
DONE"
Minneapolis surgeons are gong 10
operate on a professional thief to con-
vert him into an honest man. The
operation, to be successful, should be
the same as the preliminary operation
of turning a rooster into chicken
stew.
When two women are not on
speaking terms, the quarrel is not
necessarily serious--but when it gets
to the point where they refuse to kiss
each other in pubhc-that means Sc
riouS Trouble.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
CURTIS AND HIS ENEMIES.

The Progressives. after all, are
made of the common clay. They are
unfair and say things which will not
bear the light of day. Not all their
untruths are deliberate. Many of
their assertions are conceived in
haste and carelessness. They don't
always fight fair. At times they
seem to make a case and try to pro-
duce facts to sustain it; the case must
be made, let the facts fall where they
will.
In justice to the senior Kansas
senator. of Topeka, something should
be said.
The enemies of Curtis, both within
the state and without. show a deter
mination to do their best to defeat
him. whether the claims upon which
they base their opposition are true
or not.
To those who have followed the
situation this is apparent. Senator
Curtis is charged with doing certain
things and casting certain votes in
the United States Senate. 1t has been
specifically shown that many of these
statements are untrue and many of
the votes attributed to him were cast
directly contrary to the statements
made by those who are opposing him.
His position on reciprocity and other
Issues has been distorted
The opposition of Golfers Weekly
is VIGOROUSLY inconsistent. That
periodical which is so partisan in its
views criticised Curtis severely for his
early vote to sustain Lorimer, and
then abused the Kansas senator when
upon later evidence Curtis voted to
Gust Lorimer, his vote and those of
the other senators who changed their
views, making a sufficient number
to declare Lorimer's election void.
He is lambasted for not doing a
thing, and then chastised for doing
the same thing. He is caught going
and coming.
The Collier article on Curtis was
particularly ugly, petty and unjust. 1t
was quoted in this paper last Friday
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
EVENING CHIT
By RUTH CAMERON.

To be able to tell an interesting an
ecdote in a clever way, or, better stu
| to know how to make commonplace
happening interesting by ones man
ner of telling it, is one of the great
est of conversational gifts.
But to crowd ones conversation
with anecdotes is as great a CONVEX
sationaI mistake-especially when one
does not have a knack of telling them
Anecdotes ought to be the trimming
of conversation, not it's warp and
wool. And just as we like to see d
gown garnished and embroidered mere
and there. but do not like to see 1t
over-ornamented, so we tire of the
taIker whose conversation is all trim
ming.
Furthermore, there are certain kinds
of anecdotes which never ought to be
inflicted on a ong-suffering public.
For instance there is the narrative
whose chief element of interest lies
in knowledge of the people involved;
to tell such an anecdote to someone
who does not know these people is
like taking a stranger to neighbor-
hood minstrel show or some very anna
teur theatricals, and expecting him to
enjoy himself.
And yet, there are people who think
to divert their friends by telling them
such anecdotes in which every other
word is either the name of some un-
known person or an explanation in re-
gard TO one
Similar to these narratives are an
ecdotes requiring for their comprehen-
sion a knowledge of some trade, profess
sion or condition. The newspaper man,
for instance, tells a group of his lay
friends some story which would be
howlingly funny to a group of news
paper men, and then thinks them stu
pid because they evidently miss all the
points. HI might just as 7Tell have told the
Iov1 700 av3I No
cused them of lacking a sense of hui
NOR for not laughing. Unfamiliar
terms and technicalities spoil the best
story. Explained, they break the
march of the story; unexplained, they
make it incomprehensible.
The worst bore of all in the story
telling line is the person who has read
an interesting story or attended an
absorbing play and tries to tell you
about it.
Perhaps one man in ten thousand can
give a fairly clear synopsis of story.
And at best it is a rather pale and
warmed-over thing to hear the story
of story. But to hear 1t turned
upside down, distorted, criss-crossed
with explanations and re-explanations
like an old-fashioned letter, as the
average man does it, is-well, it's the
kind of thing that makes you retire
into the recesses of your own mind, to
commune with yourself and come back
to the surface only when the flow o
language ceases and you know it is
time for you to say: isn't that in
terestinS?''
AS the man or woman who will really
listen and try to understand a thing
like this is about as rare as the man
or woman who can tell it well, on the
whole it's better not to attempt it
For that makes nine thousand. nine
hundred and ninety-nine chances that
you are not the gifted "raconteuse"
and the same number that he is no
the. gifted listener. Rather heavy odds
don't you think?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
DAEFYDHS
By q. NoAL.L.

If Wolgast won from Rivers in Cali
fornia where did graphite?
fOld 81 Seemore will now favor us
with an exhibition of eating peas with
a knife1
If river can, put on flood stunt
can a cataract?
(Sh-hI She sleeps on the banks Of
the Kaw.)
If Topeka is unwilling to fight is
Burlingame?
drop that scythe. What do you
know about reaping machines?)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
IFrom the New York Press.l

If isn't nearly as bad for girl to have
big feet as it is for you not to say they
are small.
You can make the weakest argument
look strong to a girl If you back it up
with a box of candy.
II takes a man months to grow mus
tache but a woman can grow a figure il.
the time it takes her to dress.
A useful thing to a man about being a
GOOD swimmer is how many times he can
Teach a pretty girl. if he really doesn' /
know himself
One uncomfortable thing about having
women in politics is then they'd know
when their husbands were explaining pub
lie questions wrong to them
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Everybody wants to be guided pI
rules of his own in the game or lie.
70 y y
Some people never think or klcklns
any one until he is down ana nearly
out.
Appearances are not as deceptive as
they are generally credited with being.
Il Il
Most folk believe in fair play ouA
not so many are willing to practlce H.
< 4 =
Too many clever persons spoil 1t all
bv exhibiting such consciousness OF
their powers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-08-02
FROM OTHER PENS
THE EMPTY PEW


The christian Register has thought
| of the right and true way to cure peo-
pc of staying away from church. THE
best way to cure nonattendance at
church." says the Register. lis for
every one to attend" And then it adds,
How simple, yet how sufficient! Why
have We not thought of it before?''
There is more than joke in this dis
ccvery. The Christian Register IL
published in Boston, where no joke has
been made since DR.. Holmes died. Here
is the point of the observation; II peo-
pie wanted to go to church, they would.
You cannot employ force to make them
go. Therefore, it is a question of go
or stay at home with the people them.
selves; and the task of the church is
to cure the evil of nonattendance itself.
If it cannot cure it, it is a bad doctor.
and is not likely to be employed much
more. And there you are. Beecher
prayed not only for those who were
absent on beds of sickness, but for
those who were absent on chairs OF
wellness The man who preferred his
chair at home to a chance to hear
Beecher preach must have had some
good temperamental or moral-or i'm
moral-reason for his choice Let every,
one attend" That is the cure. And il
one does not attend-why he will have
to be let" too. The empty pew is
TIE preachers perfect work.-New York
Mail.
A GOLF-TALKERS CHAMPIONSHIP
AS indicated by the results Of fine
state tournaments" remarks Colonel
George Fitch in the Peoria Herald
Transcript. Peoria does not produce
the very best golfers in the world. but
having been an occasional guest there
at, Wen back the annual golf dinner of
the Country club against all corners for
witty drives and brassie lies" Colonel
rl.cn touches here upon one of the
main reasons for the existence and
popularity of the ancient and honorable
game. It's not only the marvellous
never before-accomplished stroke on
inc INKS that counts. It's the talk about
that stroke in the 1ocker-roonn or on
the train going home. We are glad that
Peorla excels in this branch of goIfine
skin; We shall support Colonel Fitch h
ne snouid demand of the N. G. A that
golf takers hold a national cbar1nto,-
snip contest as well as mere golf plav-
Post.