davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Paul tidende. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1902-1928, 1912-08-02
Maerk

"a &uitlupcn MI CT blepet ifGr-
pct, mcb @enipn til Detailing al
&labe og Siosifrifter, CT bet npos
penbist at Mbpmncnter entem inbbe'
taller bpaD &c ifylber, furiaautot SC
CT i @citancc, cllcr mebbeler os,
luurnaar DC fan inobctalc 8elpbet,
iamt belit ct Iar / 6prifnb.
9ette CT cnsgirloenoe for alle.
We'd Kj0b e1ler Reparation af
Ul1rc bes9g den velkjendte Juve-
Ter Simon Nelson, 2oe E. 9TH St.,
St. Paul.
St. Paul tidende. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1902-1928, 1912-08-02
100 fine Visitkort for
Gents

Send so Cents og e vii
erholde 100 fine Visitkort
med eres Navn og Adresse
paatrykt. Skriv Navnet
tydeligt.
Brevpapi1, Konvolutter
og Reggninggs s SAINT
Trykning i de skandlnavl-
ske Sprog udfores hurtigt
og billigt.
St. Paul tidende. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1902-1928, 1912-08-02

Der uil bltpc @nbstjeneitc / Ser
! bonlf=l1or lfe @olgatbu Strife, 19G
Slon!as st., pua fprl tfommcno(
! Sp1oog Norluiooog 81. 1890. 81.
Mlerol,ocr Morlppc pil prroif(
ppcr Gn1nct: ,&riltctbcltel1cs Sejrs;
gang.
MISUNDERSTANDING ofbolOer III
nrlte Mfpbe Ire0ag Mftel1 SEN 9O(
Ml1g11lt hos MrS. Gcrl1on, CSC
Como Npe1u1c. Nllc. er Djertclig1
i%n0hl10tc.
Napncfpranorin9. Oct n1eobeleS
ps, at Ealtor Nrcl Moblerp bor
faoet lopformlig Nopnefpranorii,q
og bereftcr bcobcr Mcp. Or. Mlerol1=
Der Marlome.
81 truoe bape 2plt til at lfripe
ell bel NcOaftionsortife( inoo Scan:
llef oronoringer al Dcl1 Mrt, men ifol
l1bjcs mes at beflagc at o.. Mn0ie11
bar funoet Jig befeict til at taite
&ro1 poa set apoe Ou1ife cller nor.
otlfe Naml inu hm1 bar.
LIS. ztxF - '~
; 0cm nurif Clinic. &orinI 6. $
@obc or ,petop ncnot tilhoge fra e'
SIR til Nprge bporbcn ha,1 pu:
reilt for at pperppre Sen norlft
: Mmcrifolinics @el1erolforlm1ling
&%riltiunin sen 290c SSl1ni.
/, &plrllrl @obe nreooelte, at bon ef
ter ct olmil10e1igt llotolt Enlfe q
%9lftipnrrer fer / 2an0ct % / Ncr:
&c far nloottet hcItemme iig til I'll
! mccrtage 2eOelien al 0el1 1lDt Il:
;lries Yos logertrofif / Nmcrifo, o(
at bon itrofs oil goa i9ol,1 meo q
F; oprctte Mgcntl1rer omfrin1 ! 81
, 6orene>e Stoter oa Canada. 8
;&rl1tor pil meo set f9rite blipe op
+, r2ttct t 9em Dprf, na aonl1lcl
; fommer forelg6ig til at 0elc i'm Iii
mellem ct. Ealtl og Mcp Dorf. ,
jGbica9o ct allercoc Nae11tur onret
tet og geitprer uonnpnt, oa !abc1
fort 9ib nil 2i11icns Nger1tlrer
9oroet bore fl1l0t orguniiercOc.
Smfrino 500 Sillruaere d
St. Paul tidende. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1902-1928, 1912-08-02
.2anif G%cniionat, 5grite &lasies
Scott og 2ogi. geo. 3 Srping Nnrf.

@pj Nlocr. Mrs. SSamcs Mor-
tins, 1O5 sor ga11mcl, bpDe Girs-
Sag often poa Goll1tpcts Tattig=
far1n, boorben bau, blcp broat for
fem Nar iiOen.
St. Paul tidende. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1902-1928, 1912-08-02

&c gjcitcnSc Spcripitrc al 9. g.
g., iom bar fer til Set oarli9e Sc
b%iltonsmaoe / lio1te ltge, aflag6e os
ct Environment @eigg ii0lte Man-
Dag. -.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Vanderbilt Gets a Tin.

There are a lot of stories told OF
that famous amateur whip, Alfred
Vanderbilt, who has once again taken
to himself a wife. On one occasion
he had an amusing experience while
driving his coach between London
and Brighton. At one stopping place
an American approached him and hand
ed him a substantial Tip" 81 touched
my hat in customary STYLE" said Mr..
Vanderbilt afterwards, took the
money and put it in my pocket, and 1
think had the better of him. 1 don't
know whether this particular Amer
lean intended it as snub because l
was a coachman or because he didn't
know me; let us give him the benefit
of the doubt-either way it's good
enough" Mr.. Vanderbilt, by the way,
inherited 920,0OO,0OO from his father,
the late Cornelius Vanderbilt He
owns over 100 prize horses and con-
siders coaching ''the finest sport in
the world."-London Tattler.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Drouth Getting Severe

If the present hot weather contin-
ues another week, crops will begin to
suffer severely. The hay crop was
never better and conditions have
been the best possible for it's cutting
and curing, but nearly every other
crop will suffer unless there is rain.
Potatoes are thin and the potato
bugs were never more numerous or
active. Other crops are still holding
their own but will need rain within
a week or 10 days to prevent stunt
ing or destroying them.
County Game Warden ]. A. Chaplin
of Mddlesex says that the streams
in MiddleseX and vicinity are drying
up fast and will begin to suffer from
lack of running water.
He finds trout, particularly of
large size, numerous in the pools but
few are being caught as they will not
take worm. 1t is probable they
would rise to a fly and afford good
sport but if they are to suffer from
lack of water later it is we'll that few
are being caught.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
MIahtx River Amazon.

It has been stated in official consul
lar reports that the aggregate navi-
gable waters of the Amazon and tribu-
taries for all sort of craft are estimat-
ed to exceed $4,000 miles. The aver
age depth is from 40 to $50 feet and
the average width from to 40 miles.
At the mouth near Para the river is
1873 miles wide, including the Island Of
Marajo and the northern and south
ern outlets. The immense volume Of
water discharged marks a path Of
yellow water in the blue of the Allan
tic easily distinguishable for $50
miles at sea, creating fresh water
sea while out of sight of land. This
yellow or old gold coIored water unit
ing with the equatorial current trends
to the north at the rate of six miles
an hour. and entering the Caribbean
sea forms what is recognized as the
Gull stream
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
TO TELL FUNNY STORY
PROPER METHOD IS REVEALED
BY THEoPHILus SNIFF.
Take Joke by the Hand and Lead IL
About Until Thoroughly Aequalnt-
ed, Then Assume Air Of Un-
dertaker and Spring II.

Ever since Cain slew Abel for call.
ing one of his pet jokes a chestnut,
the world has been taking lessons in
the art of being funny. The desire
to be funny turks in every human
breast. There have been men who
have lived it down, and these have in
variably become great statesmen.
The Morning Telegraph has called
upon Theophilus Sniff, the great ex-
pert and scientist, who is said to
have been the first man who ever
made a theater box Office man smile,
but he kept his secret well and be-
came famous. Prof Smiff said:
"Humor is anything that is funny.
1t is in everything and in everybody.
Extracted humor is followed by laugh.
ter, for it is by striking the responsive
humor chord in the human breast
that we get our only true effects.
Therefore, no matter how good the
joke, unless it be told in manner to
strike that cord, it falls of it's own
dead weight and furnishes us with one
Of the saddest sights in life.
Select from any well known joke
book story. It should not be too
new, as it is likely not to go so well
as an old reliable joke that has been
through several campaigns. Then cut
from it all unnecessary adjectiVes, de-
scriptions and apologies.
Never apologize for joke.
"Take your joke by the hand, and
after having led it about until you
know all of its family history, assume
the air of a funeral director telling
the relatives from which side of the
casket they are to view the late Ia
mented, and then give utterance to
your jape.
1.-THE best way is to get the point OF
the story we'll in mind and then put it
away entirely until you need it. Moth
ing so intereferes with the success Of
a joke as to have the point hanging
around in plain sight before the story
is well started.
Remember above all things that the
face should be solemn, and the voice
low and well modulated, with just a
suspicion of sadness in it.
Learn to pause at the right place,
and if you are in doubt at all, the best
place to pause is just before you start.
"This has been known to save a
man many friends that he otherwise
might have lost" New York Morning
Telegraph.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Wonderful Curiosity.

On the banks of. the Willamette
river, a short distance above Portland,
Ore, stands one of the most remark
able rocks in the world. It is known
as the Balancing rock. Rising from
a broad base is small column, rough
ly round in shape. Just above this is
huge mass of rock, bearing a tree on
the summit, the total height of rock
and column being about 100 feet. Al
though great deal larger and heav-
Ter than the pillar on which it stands,
the big rock is very accurately bal
anced. For how many centuries this
odd freak has stood not even the
wisest scientists are able to determine,
but it has evidently been there for a
very long period. The entire rock is
of a volcanic nature, and the most
singular thing about it is the fact that
the knob and pillar are entirely dis
jointed from one another. Wind and
weather, no doubt, are slowly wear
ing the Balancing rock away, but the
process is SO imperceptible that, fail
ing some unforeseen catastrophe, the
monument will probably endure for
many centuries.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Samuel N. Brown.

Samuel Newell Brown, a Boston
business man residing at 119 Com
monwealth avenue, died on Thurs
day at the age of So years, at the
New Ocean House, Puritan road,
Swampscott, of which he was the
owner. He also owned other valu-
able hotel property in various places
and was interested in many import
ant business enterprises.
Mr.. Brown was born in Boston on
April %, 1927, the son of Samuel
Newell Brown and Lydia Brown. He
was graduated from the English
high school, where he won Frank
lin silver medal. After his gradua-
ton, in 1843, he entered the employ
of the E. T. and J. P. Fairbanks,
later the Fairbanks Company, man
ufacturers of scales, which was estab-
lished in 1880 and incorporated in
1870 Mr.. Brown eventually became
vice president of the company.
In 1895 he succeeded the late
Franklin Fairbanks as president of
the company, holding that position
until H. N Turner was chosen for
the position in May, 1909.
The Ocean House at Swampscott,
where he lived in the summer time,
ne Hdu OWneu IOI d 1OhS IlLI0' anu
a few years ago he remodelled, or
practically rebuilt, the place on an
extensive scale and it was renamed
the New Ocean House.
He belonged to the Algonquin,
Boston Art and Exchange clubs, the
Boston Athletic Association, the
Tedesco Country Club at Swampscott,
The Country Club at Brookline and
Eastern Yacht Club at Marblehead.
He was twice married. His first
wife was ruth G. Haskell, of Marble
head After having been widower
for many years, Mr.. Brown, two
years ago, married for his second
wife, Mrs. Charlotte Thompson
(Ames) Bradford, who survives him.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10

The funeral of Mrs. J. F. ROBBIE of
West Somerville, Mass, whose death
occurred at Coos, n. H.. Friday after
noon, was held at the Methodist
church at St. Johnsbury Center, Mon
morning. Her pastor, Rev. George B.
Dean, from West Somerville, officiat-
ed and spoke most appreciatively of
her life and work as member of his
church. Mrs. Don G. Stiles sang three
selections at the church and one at
the grave, and a profusion of beauti-
full flowers showed the sympathy of
her many friends. She was a woman
who was known for the good she had
done and for the kindly and helpful
spirit which was always manifested
by her. A short service was held at
Coos, Sunday, by Rev. w. E. Fuller,
of Concord, N. H., and the body was
accompanied here by Mr.. and Mrs.
Thomas Atkinson and Mr.. and Mrs.
Howard Atkinson of Coos, and by her
husband and daughter Mrs. B. F.
Farrow, who were with her at Coos.
Others present from out of town were
her son-in-law, B. F. Farrow, Mrs. H.
]. Potter and Mrs. e. J. Stone from
West Somerville, Mrs. F. A. Walker
from Tampa, Florida, and Harry A.
ROBBIE from Lyndonville.
Jane Hartwell was born in Comp
ton, Canada, July s, 1888, and came
to st. Johnsbury when about 1 8 years
of age. She lived here a number OF
years, marrying for her first husband,
Edwin Stone, of this place. To them
were born three children, only one
of whom, Mrs. Farrow, is now liv-
ing. After Mr.. Ston's death she
married j. F.. Robe, on July %,
1871. To them was born one daugh-
ter, who died at ST. Johnsbury Cen
ter, about five years ago, Mrs. ].
Pierce Bell. They lived here about
seven years, going from here to
Grand Rapids, Mich, where they liv-
ed three years, from there to Allan
ia, Ca, where they lived 25 years,
and where she did missionary work
among the coIored children, coming
from there to West Somerville,
where they have since lived. Mrs.
Robe was one of a family of four
children, one son and three daugh-
ters, only one of whom survives
her, Mrs. William Daley OF Salem,
Mass. She has for many years been
member of the Methodist church,
and was a member of the choir of
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
spIkIna Obsolete Nowadays.

one reads in the war news that the
Italians found that guns in the Tr1pon
forts spiked" If that is meant lit
orally they must have been guns OF
mainly antiquarian interest.
The expression, "spiking guns" is
a survival from the day when all that
was necessary to put a gun out OF
action provided, of course, that you
had access to IT'D was a large nail OF
spike and a hammer. You simply
drove the nail into the touch-hole at
the breech. If the nail was long
enough to turn round at the end, on
the bottom of the bore, SO much the
better.
1t is just as simple, perhaps sim
pier, to put a modern gun out of &C
ton. All you want is a hammer. The
breech block of the modern gun is
held closed by screw threads, after
the breech block is shut on the shell,
a turn of two or three inches engages
the threads. BY knocking a burr ON
these threads you prevent them en-.
gaging. Any attempt to fire the gun
without the breech block being perfect
ly closed would, of course, be OF ma
terial assistance to the enemy.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Use American Liver Tablets.
VERMONT SCHOOL TEACHERS
Interesting Statistics Gathered by
Prof. Mcfarland

The Montpelier teachers have Sc
cured the amount pledged by them
to aid the Vermont Teachers Retire
ment Fund and satisfactory reports
are received from other portions of
the state. Rutland teachers raised
several hundred dollars. The report
of Professor Raymond Mcfarland of
Middlebury college on secondary ed
vocational conditions in the state CIV
es interesting statistics regarding the
teaching staff in the state.
This staff consists of 1876 men and
235 women, a total of $40 teachers.
Divided among 70 institutions this
gives an average of five teachers to
a school or one teacher to every 20
to % pupils.
The ratio of male and female sec
ondary teachers is as follows United
States, 443 per cent men and 55.7
women; North Atlantic division, 42.2
per cent men and 57.8 women;
Maine, 1915 per cent men and 60.5
women; New Hampshire, 1876 men
and GA women; Vermont, 36.5 men
and 635 women.
This shows relatively a smaller
proportion of men in Vermont
schools in comparison with secondary
schools of other states.
The salaries of male teachers
range from below $500 to $4,000.
Fifty-five per cent receive salaries
between, $500 and $1,000 and % per
cent between 81, 800 and $4,000. The
salaries of female teachers range
from $685. to 1000; SO per cent re-
ceiving between $500 and 500; rs
per cent between $500 and $1,000
and % per cent below $500.
The relation between salaries and
experience is shown in the following
table:
Men, no experience, $786; women,
1857; men, one year, 1929; women,
$497; men, two years, $685. wom-
en-, $685.; men, three years, $917;
women, $617; men, four years, ST.
075; women, 1925; men, five years,
$1,1OO; women, $500.
A silent protest by Vermont teach
ers against absurdly low salaries is
seen in the fact that none of the
teachers who receive salaries of $500
or under is a graduate of Vermont
college. A majority of the men have
an experience of five years or under.
Fifty-eight per cent of the women
have taught less than four years.
The men remain in the service SO
per cent longer. Ten and a half per
cent of teaching was excellent; 1874
per cent fair, 4S.3 per cent good and
rs per cent was poor.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
LOCAL GATHERINGS

Advertised letters: Ladies, Hill,
Miss Lena; Smith, Mrs. George;
Smith, Mrs. Thomas f. Gentlemen,
Davenport, J. w; Dean, A. c.; Good
rich, Glen; Holland. A. E.; LeBar-
on. Shandon E.; Maxfield, Bernard
W.; Placey, Alesworth; Sulham,
George H.; Woodward, Joe. Curtis,
Miss Cora (pkg.)
Fred r. Clifford has closed his
furniture business at "a Eastern
Ave. and will open up a Quality
Art Store at 81 Eastern Ave.
The College Club will meet at
Brantview Friday afternoon at $50.
A committee with Mss Margaret Mer-
ril as chairman will be in charge of
the exercises for the afternoon. A
novel program has been arranged
which will begin promptly at four
o'clock. The midsummer meeting
of the club is intended to be, IN
special way, the social Of the year.
The College Club is a very informal
organization and it is hoped that
any woman who has ever ATTENDED
any college will consider herself
member and attend the meeting
Passenger traffic on the Boston
and Maine railroad was delayed
about four hours here Monday AFTER
noon by the wreck of three freight
cars at the electric light station
crossing. The cars were in the north
bound through freight train and 1T
is supposed a brake beam fell and
three them off the track. No one
was injured and the damage was
confined to the three cars and the
track.
The Peoples Recital given by n.
r. Young will be given in Pythian
Hall. Friday afternoon at four
O'Clock. The public is cordially in
vited.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
REFUSES Old Guns to State.

A case where the lesser municipality
Is greater than the sovereign state de-
velops in the issue of obsolete ord
nance from the war and navy depart
ments. Recently the war department
received an application from a state
for a few such guns to be used for
monumental purpose. 1t declined to
grant the request, however, as it was
found that the law limits donations of
condemned ordnance to soldiers mon
uments, posts of the Grand Army of
the republic and municipal corpora
tons.
The sum of money allotted by con-
gress to the states and territories for
the maintenance of militia cannot by
hypothetical in advance, according
to a recent ruling of the militia di-
vision of the war department. The
question arose through an inquiry
from a state which desired to incur
an obligation in excess of its allot-
ment for the current year and sought
authority to make it charge against
appropriations for subsequent years, a
practice which has been disapproved
by the war department.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
Pone-Janes.

A very quiet but pretty wedding
took place at Mr.. and Mrs. Nathaniel
B. Trussell's residence on Pearl
street, thursday, July 4th at 1880
O'Clock. when Mrs. Trussells broth
er, George E. Pope, of JeffersonV1lle
was united in marriage with Isabel
Lillian James, formerly OF England.
The ceremony was performed by Rev.
A. P. Grint, pastor. of the Episcopal
church, under an arch of roses, sy-
ringias and maiden hair fern. The
bride was given away by her father,
and was charmingly gowned in pink
chiffon over pink satin trimmed with
pink folds and rosettes. She wore a
veil caught with mock orange bios
SONS and carried a shower bouquet
of bridal roses. Mrs. J. H. Pope Of
Greensboro Bend acted as bridesmaid
and wore a cream colored silk trim
med with insertion and black tip
ping. J. H. Pope, brother of the
groom was best man. Mrs. Pope had
four attendants, the Misses Marshall
Of st. Johnsbury. Mr.. and Mrs.
Pope were the recipients of many
beautiful and valuable presents, con-
sisting of cut glass, linen, silver and
china, and George H. Cross presented
the wedding cake. Mrs. POpe's go
ing away suit was a cream colored
serge with a large picture hat with
white plumes. The dining room was
prettily decorated with daisies, and
after the ceremony delicious refresh
ments were served. After a short
wedding trip through Newport, Wat
erville and Montreal, Que, they will
reside in Jeffersonville, where Mr.
Pope has a blacksmith shop.
St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1912-07-10
RECENT DEATHS


Mrs. John Proctor died at the
home of her daughter, Mrs. G. G.
Frost, Friday afternoon, after an
illness OF eight days, the cause being
infirmities of old age.
Clarissa Goss Stearns was born in
Goss Hollow, June IA, 1916, and
was the fourth daughter of Clark
Stearns and Celia Hawkins, and one
of eleven children. At the age of
Is years she was united in marriage
to Horatio G. Pierce of st. Johns
bury, who lived only a short time,
leaving with her two daughters,
Candace c., now Mrs. c. G. Frost,
whom she made her home with for
several years, and Estelle w. Pierce,
who died at the age of II years. She
later married John Proctor, formerly
of Ludlow, and two daughters were
born to them, Mrs. w. P. Chaffee,
lately deceased and Mrs. Annette P.
Magoon of Lynchburg, Va Besides
a brother, George w. Stearns of Ha-
verhill, Mass, aged over 80 years,
she is survived by four grandchil-
dren, Mrs. Harriet G. Ross, of Den
yer, Col, Mrs. Carrie F. Eastman of
st. Johnsbury, Arthur w. Chaffee, of
Washington, d. c., and Ralph Ma
COON of Lynchburg, Va, and three
great grandchildren, Beulah F., and
Irving W. Eastman of St. Johnsbury,
and John Chaffee Ross of Denver,
Colo.
Mrs. Proctor was the oldest mem
Der of the North Congregational
church, also a member of the 20
Club, both of which she was greatly
interested in and enjoyed. She waS
very domestic in her taste, quiet and
retiring in her nature, and given to
great hospitality. In her younger
days she was fond of social life and
no sacrifice was too great that she
did not gladly and willingly make in
her home and to promote the happi-
ness of those around her. The pro-
fusion of lovely flowers gave silent
witnesses of the love and grief of
her many friends. The funeral was
held from her late home Sunday af-
ternoon at $3.50 O'Clock, her pastor
Rev. G.. w. G. Hill officiating, and
was laid at rest in Hill Side Gene
terry, ST. Johnsbury Center.