davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
A Little Previous.

During the latter part Of the war be-
tween the states Basil Gildersleeve
lay one day apparently at the point Of
death. surrounded by several members
Of his family. Brother" he muir
INJURED family, # have. at most. only q
few days to live, and when am laid
to rest want You to have my new
pair of boots In the closet yonder.
paid $3.50. Confederate. for them, and
you are sorely in need Of pair" In
stead of the expected burst Of graft
tude, there was no answer. Racked
with emotion at the thought OF his
great loss. the brother was evidently
too much overcome for speech.
Brother" persisted the future 'im-
mdrtalS weakly. "you mustn't have
any foolish sentiment about those
boots. | will never be well enough to
wear them again, and 4 would be pure
extravaganza to bury me in them"
Still the brsther. bis face flushed. his
heart too full for utteranoe. made no
reply. Wont you promise me to
wear the boots after am gomez GIL
dersleeve pleaded. "Basil,' stammeced
the other, crimsoning with confusion,
"pve-got 'em on now."
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
The
The -
Scrap Book
storin,o aLoan.

A Memphis character well known
about town as brilliant, but booty, was
persistent in his applications for loans
and extremely careless about repaying
them. Several years ago this man had
induced local bank to loan him $40
and had given his note therefor. At the
end Of each three months he invariably
appeared and asked that the note be
renewed. and as there was nothing else
to do the bank always renewed it. One
day he went into the bank and said to
the cashier:
I'D like to renew that paper of mine
you have here"
Certainly" replied the cashier. an
az it up for you"
The cashier made the proper prepa-
rations for the renewal. and as he was
fixing up the paper he said:
"Say. the directors were talking about
this paper Of yourss1he other day.
They decided they wouldn't charge you
interest on it any longer"
That's very considerable of Them"
was the reply. II am glad to hear it. l
am under obligations to them"
"No." continued the cashier. Were
not going to charge you interest; we're
going to charge you storager-satur-
day Evening Post.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
A Pertinent Question,

Speaking of common sense. DR..
Faulkner. head of, the vineland IN. j.
hospital, told the following story:
A queer looking building had been
erected on the outskirts Of a small
town. 1t was shrouded in mystery.
All that was known about 1t was that
It was chemical laboratory. An old
farmer, driving past the place after
work had been started and seeing a
man in the doorway, called to him:
What be ye dom in this placer"
I'VE are searching for a. universal
solvent something that will dissolve
all things" said the chemist.
what good will tibet be?~
Imagine, sir! 1t will dissolve all
things. If we want a solution Of iron,
glass, gold-anything-Gl that we haze
to do is to drop it IN this, solution"
''Fine," said the farmer. Zine! What
be ye gotn' to keep it in"-Every-
body's.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
NOT TOO GREER.
He Knsw Enough 70 Painfully Realize
His Exact Position.

He Knsw Enough 70 Painfully Rsai'zs
His Exact Position.
Francis Kilkenny landed in Chicago
some years ago. fresh from ireland.
with but q few dollars and no Job In
sight He decided to buy a second
hand lawn mower and make some
money cutting grass. He was directed
to the north side Of Chicago and final
" struck the place where the big
houses and fine lawns are. ~
He went up the steps Of mansion.
hammered on the front door and was
vastly astonished to have man stick
his head out of an upstairs window
and ask: what are you doing there.
you greenhorn? Can't you see this
house is closed for the SUMNER
but you're in It," answered Kill
kenny.
"Sure I'm in 1t. I'm the caretaker.
II you want anything just so round to
the back door, where you belong"
Kilkenny started round, but came to
tall board fence that ran clear across
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Whore Her Rule Ended

It is reaated that upon one occa-
sion Senator rhurmans friends visited
hts house. to apprise him that new
political honor had been conferred
upon him He was pleased. but after
they had been seated few moments
the conversation Jagged. and the old
Roman seemed to be Ill at ease. His
wife tried her best to entertain the
campaigDers. and the senator excused
himself. He presently appeared with
bis boots and topcoat on. Gentle.
men," sald hs. I'VE will now 60 out
and get something to smoke. My wife
is the boss here. and we never have
anything 10 drink In the house." Mrs.
thurman looked pleased as she closed
the door after them. "As i was say
Ing" added the senator. "she runs the
house: but. thank heaven. she doesn't
run the town."
Tho Proud Father.
"Hear you've had an addition to your
family" said the first fly.
"a slight one," admitted the second
ey. This morning 100000 baby flies
arrived. Come on, and I'll set up the
ptomaines for the crowd. kansas
City Journal.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
SHOULD BE GIVEN EDUCATION
INSTEAD OF BEING KEPT AT
WORK AT HOME.

VALLEY CITY, N. D., Aug g.
That the farmer who will keep his son
out Of school to ride pillow is as much
Of law breaker as the man who sells
goods, the sale o. which is r: .hihit.1
by law, is :as belief of George A. Ne.
Farland, Dzasi mt Of the Valley City
State Normal school.
In an aa'!ccss here today to more
than 600 school teachers Of this sec.
tion he pleaded for the best possible
rural schools, these being the founda.
tion Of the commonwealth. Also Mr.
M"Farl; nd said that he teacher who
knew Of child Of school az, who was
not attending should insist upon the
law being upheld and in case she did
not, she was not fit to occupy a school
room as an instructor.
Among the ideas advanced for the
teachers to follow during the coming
year Mr.. Mcfarland urged that each
teacher take the matter before their
school boards for the imposing Of the
highest school tax allowed by law that
the rural schools might be brought to
the highest possible efficiency.
The institute promises an attendance
Of nearly 900, the Target yet to be
held in the state, more than $50 al
ready are registered, this being the
first day. The work in charge of
Lynn B. McMullen of the state nor
NAL school.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Wouidn't Lie About Golf.

Wouldn't Lie About Colt.
Grizzly Adams fell in with OpIe
Read and Bill Sterrett at Dallas.
A three handed golf match was sug-
gested. and the first hole had been
played. The second hole was beyond
an abandoned quarry. crossed by a
bridge. 1t took only an ordinary drive
to be safe, and Adams made 1t easily.
He was followed by Sterrett, and both
were on their way when Read un-
limbered-
He sliced hs drive and the ball went
into the quarry. where Opie descended
laboriqusly.
Adams and Sterrett presently heard
q succession of whacks, and after a bit
the ball came out, with Read in hot
pursuit.
"How many strokes in the quarry7'
asked Grizzly.
"Three," said Opie.
Adams turned to Sterrett. and they
both laughed.
"why," said he. "Bin and heard six
plainly"
II know" said Opie. ''but three OF
them were echoes. Post.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
STUBBORN IN POLITICS.
A National Movement to Which Hs
Was Violently Opposed.

a National Movement to Which He
Was Violently Opposed.
At the meeting Of the Illinois Bar Us
ISOLATION Judge Theodore Brentano Of
the superior court told of case tried
before him several years ago at which
the late Jim Evans. widely known
and universally liked newspaper writer.
was witness. Evans had given i'm
portant evidence. and the opposing at
torney was doing his best to shake his
testimony.
He had made Evans go back over his
past life and was questioning him re-.
garding the different positions ne had
held.
Jim was telling Of a period of his
early newspaper days when ne had held
many places and none for long
"Then where did you go?" Numbered
the lawyer after Evans had told Of
working few days in the southwest.
ITO Dallas, Tex. Worked. two
weeks" replied Evans.
why did you changer" asked the
lawyer.
"My boss and could not agree upon
q question OF national policy" was the
answer.
."Then where did you go?"
ITO New Orleans. Left there In 4
week."
And what was the reason this
time?" from the attorney.
Same thing" answered Evans with
a smile. 1.-The proprietor and found
that we did not agree upon political
question of national Importance"
The same answer was given as Evans
told Of numerous other places he had
taken and given up. The attorney
finally gave up his attempt to break
down Evans with the remark. "You
must be hard man to get along with
II you have such set political IDEAS"
A few days after the case had been
decided Judge Brentano met Evans on
the street.
'Say, Jim," he asked. what was that
| question of national Importance that
cost you SO many Jobs? What did you
and your bosses disagree over?"
Prohibition" answered Evans with
. smile.-Chicago Tribune.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
HIRED MAN TAKES TEAM OF
H0aSES AND LEAVES TIE
COUNTRY.

HANKINsON, N. D., Aug. "a
couple Of weeks ago Dan Sweeney OF
Elma, hired man for the haying sea
son. The fellow was of the hobo class
and answered to the name of "Har.
ry,' but beyond that nothing is known
of him.
Mr.. Sweeney was called away from
home over Sunday of this week and
left "Harry'' in charge Of the place
On his return the fellow was missing
together with one Of the best teams
on the farm, suit of clothes and 9th
er belongings Of his employer. A CUR
and some other effects had also been
stolen from the home Of Mr.. Hanson
neighbor.
The fellow was traced to Hankin
son, where on Monday he had cashed
forged order, purporting to be sign
ed by Mr.. Sweeney, on Fred Burrows
for $40. The gun and clothes he
pawned to V. K. Baltulis for SIS in
casn. lie left town during the after
noon, 81 ice which time n, trace OF
him can be found, and he apparently
has made clean getaway.
Chief Of Police Phillips and Sheriff
Robbins are working on the case and
hope to land the culprit behind the
bars in due time. He covered up his
tracks so thoroughly as to battle pur.
suit so far, however.
"Harry" is descsibed as heavy
set man about 25 years of age, smooth
shaver, and of more than average in
telligence. The team were blacks and
the buggy black buggy with red
running gear. After leaving town,
the rig was seen in the vicinity Of
Lightning's Nest, but from there all
trace was lost.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
The Book Of Years,

In sleep turned the volume Of my years.
The leaves were many. rough and soiled
and marred.
And here and there line was blurred
and SCARED
Where to erase it I had tried with tears.
No page was perfect, but through all there
ran
Fair lines and many spaces white and
clear.
All. small they were. the blotted lines
too near
But each showed where higher thought
beganl
Unknowingiy traced theoe pages inter-
lined.
I thought them but loose leaves soon
torn and lost.
knew not then the tears which they
should cost
When in the western sky my sun de-
clined.
Could but write them now how fair they
all should look
When the great angel comes to close and
seal my book!
-Ninette NJ. Lowater.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Wit That Mon

When the late Stilson Hutchins own.
ed two newspapers in St Louis hs
kept standing along the top of the edi.
torial page Of each. while the Dis.
patch and Times are under the sans
proprietorship. they are under distinct
and separate management" One day
he learned that Stanley Huntley,
author Of the "Spoopendyke Papers"
his correspondent at jefferson City,
had been celebrating unwisely. He tel
egraphed, dismissing him. and signed
the message IS. H."
Huntley replied: II was gay last
night and am sick today. My condi
tion Of today and my condition Of last
night, while under the same proprietor
ship, are under distinct and separate
management"
Hutchins wired back, retaining
Huntley and raising his salary.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Marx nwain's Mission.

Mark Twain did not cherish fond.
ness fo1 the average Office boy. he
had an idea that the genus was in
sunSrable, and Invariably when the
humorist sailed forth into some bust
ness office there was immediate armed
hostility between him and the boy.
One day Mark went to see friend
ct bis Office, and the Office boy ON
guard. in Icy tones. said:
whom do You wish to seer
Mark mentioned his friends name
what do you want to see him
about?" came next fSom the boy.
Mark Twain Immediately froze up,
and then. with a genial smile be said:
"Tell him. please. want to ask Ids
hand in holy matrimony."
Of Course Not.
II don't eat enough to keep a bird
alive"
"You couldn't, my dear, proportion
ately speaking. Science tells us that a
bird eats two and one-half times its
own weight every twenty -four hours"
Louisville Courier-Journal.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09

eating the coarse fare Of the railroad
laborees and got little enough even of
that, so that they all had magnif-
cent hunger on when the train reached
Z small station. at which there was a
restaurant. and the Englishman was
the first to find seat at table.
Bring me in hurry" he said to the
landlord. a buray western man, "a por-
terhopse steak, some deviled kidneys, a
brace of chops, plenty of vegetables
and two bottles Of Bass bitter beer"
The landlord looked startled for a
moment, stuch his head out of the din
ing room door and yelled to somebody
In the rear apartment, "Say Bill, tell
the band 70 play Rule Britannia the
Prince of Wales has came"
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Force Of Habit.

In New York, during the old Bo-
hemian days Of Ada Glare. Harry
Clapp, George Arnold, William Winter
and the rest, Nat Urner. the novelist.
knew every bohemian and had got so
used to pathetic tales Of personal dis
tress that whenever he met man he
unconsciously assumed that man to be
in hard luck. Meeting Frank Patton
one day. he said to him. well. how
are you. my dear boy?" First rate"
said Patton: "got an editorial position.
got good wife, got bank account,
and everything Is lovely" WELL"
said Arnold. never mind. old fellow,
Cheer up, cheer up" 4-~r''
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Jefferson's Prayer and PouItice.

Jenerson'S Prayer and PouItice.
Joseph Jefferson was suddenly taken
III once while visiting at the home of
a friend. The wife of the friend whose
hospitality he had enjoyed became
alarmed oyer his condition and. being
Of a religious turn Of mind. wished to
instill in the mind of the actor her be-
lief in the necessity for spiritual con-
temptation. A call to his room for the
purpose of applying a poultice gave
her the much desired opportunity.
"Mr. Jefferson" she said. nervously
shifting the poultice from one hand to
the other, ''for your sake. for the sake
of your friends. your family. IL
would like to pray fer you"
The actor listened attentvely. and
bis answer came slowly. Eyes. mad
am" he said, 'you may-for my sake,
for your sake. for everybody's sake
but for heavens sake put on that poul-
ticey'
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09

The hail losses in Ramsey county
amount to more than the amount col
lccted for state hail insurance. in the.
entire county this year, and if the
same is true over ths entire :ta:e.
the mutual insurance company under
Moth Dakota control will be discount
ing the payment Of losses considera-
bic.
Commissioners johnson, Thelin and
Maloney spent yesterday in adjusting
the hail losses in the county for the
state mutual yesterday, the result be-
ing that the losses now total over
$4,000, while the amount collected in
the county is scarcely over $4,000, to-
gether with the fact that H. A. King
of Lakota who has 24OO acres in Ram.
sey county has had some loss which
has had ONE loss which has not vet
been adjusted.
Since every county in the state has
been hit more or less by miniature hail
storms in the state enough to incur
some loss, and Ramsey county leafs
the others in the amount of hail in
surance written for the state, there
being considerably more written this
year than last year, it now looks as
though the state association would
have difficulty in getting On its feet,
and it may be that the total amount
of losses in Ramsey county will have
to be discounted, although the state
mutual will continue to write hail in
surance until Aug. Is.
The county commissioners adjusted
the following hail losses in the county
yesterday.
J. 0. Engesather, Fancher township,
Section IL, adjusted at 1928, loss 20
per cent.
J. E. McLain, Fancher township,
Section 18, loss ninety per cent, ad-
justed at $1440.
Miss Winifred Donahue. Overland
township, Section 20, 81 and 1e, loss
25 to so pei. cent, adjusted at $s03.33.
I. 0. Fjalstad, Highland township,
Section 80, and Newland township,
Section S, loss 10 per cent, adjusted at
$3.50.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09

the lawn and had spikes on it. He
didn't see the door In the fence and,
after figuring for time. put his lawn
mower against the fence and tried to
climb over regardless of the spikes.
The lawn mower slipped, and Kilkenny
stuck on one of the spikes and hung
suspended. .5
The caretaker heard his yells and
came out Finding Kilkenny hanging
there in the air. he looked up at him
and said:
swell. you are green! How long
have you been over?"
"Begobs" shouted Kilkenny. 81
amt over yet"-Philadelphia Satur-
day Evening Post.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
He Got the Room.

In Goal Oil Johnny's'' flush times he
went to hotel and registered, but the
clerk would not give him a room be-
cause he had no baggage. Johnny was
not going to be stopped by anything
like that. Although it was we'll along
in the evening. he went to the house
Of trunkmaker and woke him up.
He made him dazzling offer. and tho
dealer came downtown and opened
up. Two expfessmen were dug up
similarly: The oil prince Fortunatus
then went back to the hotel and said.
Il want that room; also have twenty
trunks. and want them all delivered
in my room Immediately"
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09

CHOCOLATE. served my guests.
It was steaming hot, but the whipped
cream gave it a different appearance
The young man of whom I am speak
ing was engrossed In conversation with
one Of the. debutantes and did not no
tice the chocolate was hot. He took
one gulp. and then what happened I
will never forget.
HE merely turned his head to one
side and spat the chocolate on the new
wall paper. Not in the least embar-
raised, he turned to the guests and re-
marked:
Now. don't you know that some
fools would have swallowed It? 1t was
50 funny that we were all forced to
augh."-L0ufsville Times.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
DEFEAT LANGDoN IN INTEREST.
ING CONTEsT-MUNICH IS
CHAMPION.

special TO Gne world. -..
MUNICH, N. D., Aug. 6.-Munich
won two more games from Langdon.
The first game was won by the score
of IA to S. CAVITY and KERN were the
battery for Munich and Lee, Monnett
and Estevan far Langdon.
CAVITY pitched his usual excellent
game and Munich was heavy at bat
all around.
A six inning game was arranged 70,
in the evening. This went to Munich
by the score Of 2 to 1. Battery 70,
Munich, Nelson and KERN, for Lang.
don, Estevan and Stenvick.
This makes the 18th consecutive
game for Munich, five Of these being
from the fast Langdon team, and
should give Munich a strong claim to
the championship in the northern part
Of the state.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09

his head. and he TO MOVE.
appeared to be on the verge of a COL
lapse.
You don't seem WELL" Sir Luke re-
marked sympathetically.
"Noa. zur!" gasped the man.
docs the pose tire you?" the artist
asked.
"Noa. EUR: faint that what does It;
it's the holdin' me breath so longv'
The unfortunate man had somehow
got the idea that mot to move on any
account" included that he mustn't
breathe.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
Answered to the Nan,e.

A couple Of drummers. having few
hours layover in a small town, de-
cided to dine at the village hotel. On
looking over the bill of fare they noted
that young FRY" were Especial" for
that meal. SO one of the men turned
to the pretty little waitress and asked:
Flows the chicken?"
The young lady blushed. then an.
swered: "Oh. I'm all right. How are
youT-Everyb ody's.
Sympathy.
Regular Customer-I shall want q
large quantity of flowers from you
next week for my daughters coming
out. Flower Woman-Yes. mum. You
shall ave the very best for FER, pore
dear. Wot were she put in for?-Lon-
don Punch.
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
French With a 1rogue,

A story is told Of certain mayor Of
Cork who headed deputation to the
emperor Of the French and commenced
an grafton to his majesty in what he
conceived to be the French tongue.
"Pardon me-" said the emperor, after
he had listened to the speech with
much patience. English I know fairly
well: but, regret to say, have never
had an opportunity of studying the
Irish languagey'
Devils Lake weekly world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1914, 1912-08-09
EIsinore and tho Senior.

When F. H. Heald settledson the Ma
chad0 ranch. near San Diego. and be-
gan to build Elsinore. then unnamed.
he was puzzled about the christening
What should he call the coming city
by the lake and springs? Finally he
chose lake something or other-a long
eompound-but the postoff1ce authori-
ties would not have it. They wrote
Mr.. Head that one word was enough
and sent him a list to choose from. He
look Elsinore and few days after
ward announced the fast to old Senior
Machado. The aged don was for a
moment nonplused. "El Senor.' he
said. (which senior do you mean. your
self or myself?" yourself. Of course"
replied the diplomatic Heald. And to
this day the Machados believe that
the name ElsiBore Is but a gringo cor
ruption Of "El Senor." the senior who
owned the original property .-Argonaut.