The Logan Republican. [volume] (Logan, Utah) 1902-1924, 1912-12-05
THE MEXICAN REBELS

POUNDS and for Saint Charity, but being a
rebel in Mexico is sure hard lnes If the afore-
said rebels fail to continue their rebeling the gov
eminent will overtake them and then they will be
summarily spontaneously and as 1t were, eXpedi-
tiously dealt with; on the other hand II they con-
tinue to rebel the government serves notice that
as soon 1t does get the bulge on them 1t propos-
es to macerate, extermnate, and annihiate every
mothers son of the great unwashed" bunch which
now goes to make up the pride and glory of Orozco
the rebel chieftain.
Therefore we say, and again repeat, 1t Is
hard lines being rebel in Mexico. In fact 1t were
better for most of the Manufactured gingerbread
lean lank and hungry horde, that they had been
shaken into the gunny sack with the rest OF the
odd kittens ere yet the light Of rebellion had Gin
ted its CLEANS into their gluttonous orbs and cast
as It Woodworking to the coloquialisms OF
Champ Clark-into the midst of the nearest mill
pond.
However, new hope now injects its luminous
perspective into the Pickering lmelight. The new
secretary of the interior-not the one who was the
new one last time but the one who has Just re-
Gently been put in since the other fellow was put
out speaking paregoricaly, as one Democrat speak
eth with his feow-ths new secretary OF the In
terror for the great State, Nation, Republic or
whatever Mexico is just at present rises to remark
that. according to his best knowledge and belief
opinion as a unanimous unit, that If the rebels OF
Mexico were assured that the federal government
would extend clemency-whatever that is-to the
aforesaid rebels that they would forthwith, and ac
cordingly, and with undue precipitation and haste
lay down their arms, their machetes, their slckies
and their other adornments of war, and become as
Progressives who had failed to progress.
In other words-if more words should be nee
essary-he gives it as his opinion that the rebels
hnnnn
fear that the government will proceed to deal out
summary punishment should they surrender Mexico
He advocates therefore, the issuance of a pro-
clamation OF amnesty to all rebels who will now
pledge their honor-that being about all they nave
left to pledge, and most of them being woetuily
lacking in that article-to cease from torment
ing the vitals OF the government and take up again
the ways Of peace.
That on the face of it sound good III now'
the federal government in Mexico can only cause
the rebels to see that under the present drastic
program there is considerable danger of their be-
ing overtaken by the government forces before the
decrepitude of advanced age overtakes them the
plan ought to work admirably. Can they make them
see II? That is the crucial point, as Ollie James
suggested when he begged for the production OF
square pea because, perforce, he now hnds difncui
ty in keeping the present round ones on his knife
while in transit to his mouth
Howsumnever, Bill Glasmann might put II
in one of his fervd pleas for more progressive
form of Progressvism, the Mexicanos do certainly
keep up some fuss When we calmly contemplate
the speck of country which our third grade geog
raphy gives to the entire country OF Mexico II
seems as though an ordinary man might easily
straddle the whole nation and have one foot Dang
ling idly in the Pacific while with the big toe o
the other he might amuse himself by jabbing the lf
out OF the jelly fish which line the coral limits o
the Atlantic. Howsumneyer, again reyerting TO TN
possible asservation OF our friend Bill, the rus
at the present moment appears nearer to sci
Element than 1t did six months ago. Meantlm
the rebel hordes-there must be hordes else nov
could they continue killing of the thousands tina
are exterminated In each battle without using u
the supply-win continue to fight with thei
nouths) and disturb the peace of peacelovins cit
Gems while win or lose whichever way 1t goes tn
fighters will be no better on than they were in tn
BEGINNING therefore We again rise TO remark, tina
! being a rebel in Mexico is sure hard lines.
| plNcAoT
!.
| A headline in an eastern newspaper recent
read as follows: Fish Nearly browns Pinchot
I That item passes UNDECIDED In the east but
the west there 10 many a man who would like
drink tn. health OF that nsh and to pronounce
toast over the drink which would be: The mol
! power TO hin next time"
| We hope the election will have tendency
| quiet Mr. Pinchot for some years to CONS.
\ have had plenty OF him Indeed II he should gro
angry and disguised at the treatment OF his cou
I try and remove to a foreign lana, thus expstriS
ing himself forever, his country would try TO ~
l IT. and At the same time extend much Rymra
l as n haA 70 spare to the other land whore NJ
PhoAst aisAt % sor a Aons.-Tss Telegram