The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1912-12-04
BY ESTHER GRIFFIN WHITE.

cynic.
Especially the people who don't
know you and never said two words
to you in their natural lives" contin-
ued Sal.
THAT doesn't surprise me as much
as the things the people who know
you say" grinned the cynic.
isn't that the TRUTH" exclaimed
Sal
ut surely ami" calculated the cynic.
There's nothing" went on the Gym
ic, that would give me more ex-
quisite joy than to know what-you-
for example, say about me when I'm
not round
"Why, you horrid thing!" said Sal,
when you know l say the incest
things you ever heard!"
"Oh-anybody'd have to say that, -
smiled the cynic.
Say what?"
THAT they said the incest things.
I'm disappointed in you. l expected
you to be more original
Then if I'd told the truth you'd
have abused me for my bad manners
cried Sal.
$50 you admit it"
why l do not! l don't know what
you mean-but | don't admit any
thing." Moderated Sal.
"My dear Sarah" deployed the Gym
ic. pray thee do not so excite thy
self Why not be a dead game sport
and when thee finds thyself ambush
ed, back up against the wall and use
thy own weapons rather than turn tail
and run"
81 never heard anything so perfect
ly silly!" exclaimed Sal And l don't
care if l did say it, it was mean of you
to trap me-because l do say nice
things about you-sometimes, she
added with a fiendish grin.
ooh, woman, thou vert ever thus!"
murmured the cynic.
"All the same it is queer what peo-
pie say about you," reiterated Sal.
How do people, who were never in
your house and who never did any
thing but pass the time O. day with
you, know what you said to your moth
er-in-law and what she said to you and
how you ran upstairs and threw a
lampshade out of the bathroom door
down the cellar steps and how she
said that she had always warned Edith
against you and that, anyway, you'd
have to get out of this house because
it was hers and if you couldn't be more
respectful you'd have to rent house
of your own and then you'd fnd out
how it went to pay something besides
the grocer's bill and-how just then
Edith ran in between you and implor-
ed her mother to stop and you to re.
strain elf-and-and-"
"Take one long breath and count
two" murmured the cynic.
Now, how do they know it," asked
Sal
Don't ask me-" said the cynic, 81
didn't tell EN-"
Neither did anybody else. You
didn't, Edith didn't, your mother-in,
law didn't-in fact none of you ever
mentioned it and yet Mrs. Dubbydub
who lives three miles away in another
part of town, who doesn't know any.
body that you know and with whom
you never exchanged word in your
life is whispering this story in cor
ners where your shadow never falls
she not only tells it, but believes
it,
And the funny part of the whole
thing is continued Sal, that such ar
incident never occurred and such q
triangular conversation was never
held"
you amaze me-" murmured the
cynic.
NO 1 don't amaze YOU" cried Sal
You know perfectly we'll this is al
true enough and you just want tc
change the conversation-but you're
not going to-" she snapped
You wrong me Sal, DEAR" sootheG
the cynic, "go OIL love to hear yor
talk
The only reason I'm going on il
because I know you don't like to heal
me talk" smiled Sal sweetly.
Your lovely disposition is one o.
your greatest social assets my Sal,
grinned the cynic.
And yet people will go on telline
these marvellous tales about what hap
pened in peoples houses and what sh<
said to him and what he said to hel
and how the neighbors heard and die
you ever, and wasn't it perfectly aw
full, when the wonder is how they
know it at all when nobody was within
shouting distance!"
You've got me there!" murmureG
the cynic.
Now this is what want to know,
said Sal, who tells it in the frs
place and how does it start? The truth
is that half Of the coin of converse
tional exchange is counterfeit anG
nine-tenths of the balance false.
I'm instance, somebody / never
heard of told somebody else l didnt
know that went to a party in an ev
ening dress and a sailor hiatt" CRIED
Sal
Now the funny thing is that
| haven't been to party for two years
haven't any evening dress and the
only sailor hat I've had for the pas
| half century was cast on the ash-heaI
exactly six years ago."
| Il am completely flabbergasted!
| feebly exclaimed the cynic.
| But the worse part of the whole
thing is murmured Sal aggrievedly
that I'd be accused of doing such 6
thing. l. Who deliver lectures before