Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1912-09-16
Aunt Sarah's
Pension Money
Copyright. 1872. by Associated Lit
erary Press. e
By NJ QUAD

and went to the front to be killed. II
was years afterward that Aunt Sarah
got her pension, and then IL came in
lump sum OF SGoe. She was fifty-fye
years old then and living with rela-
lives. a.. .r .Fss
There were two brothers, two broth
ers-in-law. three sisters and four or
Eve uncles and aunts interested In that
pension money 1t came by the =
o'clock mail. and by 9 O'Clock the news
had buzzed all through the village and
reached relatives living eleven miles
away. That evening there was an as
sembly at the house OF brother Moses
The family had let the dish washing go
and dressed up. Annt Sarah In her
calico best. She was 5000 woman
now. and brother Moses had said to
her: =.
I'm take charge Of the money aud
all youth have to do the rest of your
life Is to eat peach preserves and sit
with folded hands
The other relatives. as fast as they
approached. made similar offers. and
there was hardly man In the village
who didnt offer to borrow the money
and pay 10 per cent interest. Aunt
Sarah csntainly held the center Of the
stage She had ,often been tainted
with having no will OF her own. but
now 1t was found that her relatives
had made great big mistake. She
had will. She refused to let any one
of them take charge of her finances.
She refused to lend shilling: She re-
fused to follow any advice about in
vesting 1t. She proposed to paddle her
own canoe. When she cashel the
check she refused to bank the money.
but carried the wad OF greenhacks
around In q pocket made for the pur-
pose.
How was any relative to get his
hands on that money! This kept sew
eraI men and women awake nights
and gave them shiyers in. the daytime.
It seemed that cajolery or battery
was the only course. They had Aunt
Sarah from home to home. She was
fed on preserves and lodged In the
spare room. She had an alpaca dress
and new bonnet II she went to feed
the hogs or wash the dishes she was
chased back Into the parl0r and told
to look at the photos In the family
album. She was, told that she was
growing younger every hour. and she
was provided with hair, dye and
toothbulEh. and after couple OF
weeks hints would be thrown out thaf
she had better hand over the money.
She was always ready to pass on to
the next relative after that.
Things finally got around to Moses
again. He had been thinking and try
ing to decide what bis duty was. He
had finally made up his mind He
didn't even tell his wife about it He
was NOT secretiye as q rule. but IN this
case he felt that he could do his duty
unaided. At midnight. when Aunt
Sarah. was soundiy asleep IN the best
bed in the house and dreaming Of the
ounce preserves she had eaten for
supper. Moses left his own bed and the
house and started to crawl into her
open window. It was known to him
that once the widow was asleep no
thunderclap could awaken her. Under
the window he deposited an old pair
of shoes. and on the grass not far away
he left an old hat Suspicion must be
cast upon tramp. you see.
The loving brother had got most of
his body into the room when Aunt
Sarah bobbed out Of bed and grabbed
q chair and brought II down on the
head Of the intruder with such force
as to break the legs and his head at
the same time. The chair fell to the
floor. and Moses fell to the ground.
There was an alarm. He was not a
good liar and realized the fact. and so
he simply explained that it was case
OF sleepwalking. He had gone to bed
worrying about the sisters money and
In his sleep had tried to crawl into the
window to see If it was safe.
After Moses had done his duty, or
made good try at it, the 5000 widow
accepted an invitation to pass couple
Of weeks with a friend. She was bit
afraid that some Of her other relatives
might try the sleepwalking stunt
Amid all the planning and talking no
one had mentioned marriage. Such an
idea was preposterous. Fifty-fye
years and over and no man in sight
They had said she was growing young
er; that she almost had girly walk.
One afternoon Aunt Sarah took |
walk dow. the highway to bridge
over a creek. She was standing there
when Deacon Griscom, sixty years old,
came along. He looked at her and
halted and asked: rs-
. ''Mebbe you are a wilder woman
81 am"
and Pm a wilder man Want to
get married."
1Why-whv-I hadn't thouOhtN-