The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-12-13
EVENING CHAT
q RVTA CAANRON.

The other day I was grieved to see
in the paper an item to the effect that
an old friend of mine who had been
married about twelve years had just
been granted a divorce from her hus-
band.
The grounds were incompatibility.
The divorce was uncontested. 1t was
evidently one of those cases in which
the two parties have mutually agreed
to disagree and to ask the divorce
courts to let them do 1t.
As l read the news item, there
flashed into my mind a conversation
L had with my friend about four years
after she was married. We were
speaking of another young woman
who had been married about the same
time and had two babies, and of the
fact that my friend had no children.
"Oh, yes, I'm fond enough of child
ren," she said, but you know Fred
and l are unusually devoted, and 1
don't want any children because I'm
afraid they will come between US and
spoil our comradeship."
That was eight years ago. Today
the other woman has a family of five
beautiful sons and daughters, very
happy home and a devoted husband.
While the woman who didn't want
children to come between her and her
husband has neither home nor child
rem nor husband.
eSs CHllQT0n OIpen 90 come De-
tween them as bond infinitely more
powerful and enduring than mere va
grant desire.
1 thoroughly believe that it is well
if a young couple can have a year or
two to get used to married life and
adjust themselves to each other be-
fore they add to their responsibilities.
But the couple who think of marriage
as pleasant companionship which
babies would spoil, are steering away
a I-af
to a deadly Charybdis.
About once in so often I have such
interesting letters from my letter
friends that can't keep them to my
self. The following is one of these:
Il want to thank you for the re-
marks of today in regard to the I'M
married woman. have been repeat
eddy struck by the persistency with
which the writers and speakers on
this subject treat the unmarried wom-
ans condition as entirely a matter of
choice-as if every woman in an of
flee or business position of any sort
had deliberately selected that sort of
life rather than natrimony and moth
erhood.
Il am more and more sure that
there are very few women that in
their hearts would not prefer hus-
bands and homes and babies to any
sort of outside work, provided the
husbands are men, rather than brutes
on the one hand or weak Overgrown
boys on the other.
THE fact of the matter is, 1 verify
believe, that big proportion of the
women are so much more intelligent,
more self-respecting, and more decent
than the men (the corresponding pro-
portion of men) that there are not
enough even passable men to go
around. I know nothing of the big
cities, but I do know some of the
small towns, and as I look about see
a number of well-poised, intelligent,
self-respecting, wholesome young wo-
men at work in different office or
other positions-or living at home, for
the same thing holds good with those
who do not work, to a great extent
for whom absolutely fail to see any
corresponding group of possible hus-
bands. Even the brothers of some of i
these very same young women (who, |
of course, might be possible husbands |
for others of the group are in many |
instances absolutely no good
Putting aside all question of econo-
mic conditions in considering the |
working woman of the better class it |
does certainly seem that there will |
have to be bigger proportion of up |
right and clean-living and well-work- |
ing men, before the bachelor woman |
is to be seriously blamed for her own |
condition in life. Better to have no |
babies than that they should have |
selfish, careless, spineless, dissipated |
father, even though the greatest joys /
of life be never tasted."-A Working |
Woman.