Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1912-08-15

in his disguise. The best he could
think of was: Twill somebody lend
me lead pencil?"
What for?" said Wellington, un-
easily.
81 am going to roll your upper lid
up on it," said the Doctor.
ooh, no, you're not" said the pa
tient you can roll your own Ids"
Then the conductor, still another
conductor, wandered on the scene and
asked as if it were not a world-impor-
tant matter: whats the matter
pick up a cinder?"
Yes. Perhaps you can get it out"
the alleged doctor appealed.
The conductor nodded: "The best
way is this-take hold Of the wink.
ers."
"The what?" mumbled Wellington.
Grab the winkers Of your upper
eyelid in your right hand"
1--WE got EN-"
Now grab the winkers Of your low
er eyelid in your left hand. Now
raise the right hand, push the under
lid under the overlid and haul the
overlid over the underlid; when you
have the overlid we'll over the un-
der"
Wellington waved him away: "Say,
what do you think I'm trying to do?
stuff a mattress? Get out of my way.
I W nf my yxyifn-laaI 70 fa -
An excellent idea," said DR.. Tenn.
pie, who had been praying for a recon
Citation.
He guided Wellington with difficulty
to the observation room and, finding
Mrs. Wellington at the desk as usual,
he began: ooh, Mrs. Wellington, may
l introduce you to your husband"
Mrs. Wellington rose haughtily,
caught a sight of her suffering consort
and ran to him with a cry Of Jim
mie!"
"Lucretia!"
What's happened-are you killed."
I'm Far from we'll. But don't wor-
ry. My life insurance is paid up"
ooh, my poor little darling" Mrs.
Jimmie fiuttered, What on earth ails
you?" She turned to the doctor. as
he going to die?"
81 think not" said the doctor. cts
only bad case of cinder-in-the-eye-
It's"
Thus treasured, Mrs. Wellington
went into the patients eye with her
handkerchief. as that the eye?" she
asked.
"No!" he howled, "the other one"
She went into that and came out
with the cinder.
"There!r It's just tiny speck"
Wellington regarded the mote with
amazement. "Is that all? 1t felt as If
l had Pixies Peak in my eye" Then
he waxed tender. ooh, Lucretia, how
can l ever" ...a
But she drew away with a disdain
full: Give me back my hand, please"
Nov, Lucretia," he protested,
don't you think you're carrying this
pretty far"
"Only as far as Reno" she answered
grimly, which stung him to retort:
You'd better take the beam out Of
your own eye. now that you've taken
the cinder out of NINE" but she, not
ing that they were the center Of inter
est, observed: "All the passengers are
enjoying this, my dear. You'd better
go back to the cafe"
Wellington regarded her with a re-
vt1lufnn IN yh,,nInrad OF
her: 81 will go back, but allow me to
inform you, my dear madam, that I'll
not drink another drop-just to sur
prise you"
Mrs. Wellington shrugged her shout
ders at this ancient threat and Jimmie
stumbled back to his lair, whittier the
men followed him. Feeling sympathy
In the atmosphere, Little Jimmie felt
impelled to pour out his grief:
"Jellmen, I'm brok'n-heartless
man. Mrs. Well'n'ton is queen
among women, but she has temper Of
taralt-"
Wedgewood broke in: 81 say, old
boy, you've carried this ballast for
three days now, wherever did you get
ito"
Wellington drew himself up proud
ly for a moment before he slumped
back into himself. well, you see,
when I announced to a few friends
that I was about to leave Mrs. We'll
linton forever and that l was going
out to-to-you know
"RpnO Wa know Well 2O
well, a crowd of my friends got up
a farewell sort Of divorce breakfast
and some of 'em felt so very sad about
my divorce that they drank little too
much, and the rest of my friends felt
so very glad about my divorce, that
they drank little too much. And, Of
course, had to join both parties"
And that breakfast" said Ashton,
Tasted till the train started, eh?"
Wellington glowered back triumph
antly. LASTED till the train started?
Jellmen, that breakfast is going yeti"
CHAPTER XXI.