Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1912-08-29
DMHER(G QR!E5. GkS
-H-11 XII
nent very easily answered..

4'%
nent very easily answered.
The preacher was urging his sailor
audience not to drink; he was point
ing out to them the divine admonitions
against drinking. when a shellback
rose unsteadly.
"'Captain.' said the %shellback, 4
don't--hic-believe everything that's
printed In the scriptures. Take that
there-hic-walkin' or the water. l
don believe anybody can walk on the
water. Can you-hic-do it y6urselfo'
My friend replied the minister.
I Gun walk better or water than l
can on rum"
Senator Alice. OF Delaware. who
served "a few years In the Senate, had
a pair of very short legs. AS a result
there was little difference in his height
when he was sitting or standing at his
desk.
one morning. when the late Senator
Frye. of Maine. as president pro tenn
pore. was presiding; Senator Alice
Frye was a bit short sighted. He
looked in Allcc's direction and then
turned to h assistant clerk and
asked testify:
Rose. is that little man from Della
hanged IL l can tell"
During the time OF the French revo-
luton. Edmund Burke created some
thing OF IA sensation In the house Of
commons by taking a huge dagger
from his pocket and. throwing 1t on
the speakers table. exclaiming:
There is French fraternity for you.
Such is the poniard which French
Jacobins would plunge in the heart Of
u sovereign"
This dramatic exhibition startled
the house for a moment. but soon the
dagger was greeted with a litter. then
Il shout of laughter when Sheridan
said:
The gentleman has brought his
knife with him, but where's the fork?'
When James T.. Brady first opened
n lawyers office in New York he took
a basement room which had been
previously occupied by a cobbler. He
was somewhat annoyed by the pre-
vious occupants callers, and irritated
by the fact that he had few of his own.
One day an Irishman entered.
The cobbler's gone. l See" he said.
II should think he has," tartly re-
sponded Brady.
And what do you sell?" said the
visitor. looking at the solitary table
and IA few law books.
"Blockheads," responded Brady.
"Begorra." said the 1rishman. I'VE
must be doing q mighty fine business
we hain't got but n left"
Owen Wister. the novelist. was talk
Ing in Philadelphia about a poet whose
work sold poorly.
Poets are usually without honor"
he said. Remember Wordsworth's
caSe.
was in the habit of spouting his po-
etry aloud as he o his lonely walks.
Thus he polished and elaborated his
lines. Thus, too, he got the reputation
among the Rydal Lake folks OF being
q bit daft.
Wen. John, what's the newsy'
Hartley Coleridge one asked an old
stonebreaker by the lake shore.
why, not varra partickler,' the
stonebreaker replied. only old Words
worth's broken loose again."
When General Moreau was i in Eng
land he was once the victim " a
rather droll misunderstanding. He
was present at a concert where q
piece was sung by the choir with the
refrain:
..Tomorrow, tomorrow"
Having a very imperfect knowledge
of English he fancied it to be a can
tata given in his honor. and thought
he distinguished the words:
ITO Moreau. to Moreau."
Each time the refrain was repeated
he rose to his feet n gracefully
bowed on all sides, to the great aston
ishment of the audience. who did not
know what to make OF it.
Jobson and his wife were enjoying
a stroll along the quiet country road.
The footpath was extremely narrow.
and Jobson, of course. was more of
it than on. Thus, when the motor car
rushed around the corner. poor old
Jobson got it in the small of his bac
The owner Of the car jumped off to
render assistance and the injured man