davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

Livermore, Cal, April 22.-stlcklng
to his saddle through a 2OO-foot fall
to the bottom of a gulch, William
Blanch lay for hours pinioned be-
meath his horses dead body. 1T
shook me up a Bit" he admitted
when rescued.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

day, and the election laws, whenever
the opportunity and necessity re-
qulre.
It is claimed that Guggenheim, AS
tor and others of those on the I'll
tanic dressed in evening clothes and
said they would go down like gem
tlemen." The story is probably
made Of whole cloth; but it listens
good.
If the settlement Of the selection
Of candidates would also remove the
pictures of the whole gang from the
landscape, 1t might be conducive to
harmony and add much to the beauty
Of the scenery.
Joe Morton is a philosopher He
says his troubles politically are now
over while those Of Selling and Lane
have Just begun.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22
To Aid the Victims.

UNITED PREsS IFAsED wIRE.l
San Francisco, April 22.-Next Fri
day = "Titanic Fund Day"-nearly
500 motion picture and vaudeville
houses here are planning to devote
their receipts to the benefit of the
survivors of the lost liner.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

For rheumatism you will find moth
ing better than Chamberlain's Lini-
ment. Try II and see how quickly II
gives relief, For sale at Perry's Drug
Store.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

A woman likes to say OF her hus-
band that she doesn't believe he ever
would get up II she didn't call him.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

Flags were at half mast in Port
land Saturday over the Titanic dis
aster-not over defeated candidates.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

GO acres on main Jefferson road;
So acres improved; IA acres fine g.
year-old prunes and cherries House
and two barns. Price, 500 per
acre.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

so acres all gentle slope; 40 acres
cultivated and 40 acres fir timber
Well fenced and on good road
Small house, $75 per acre.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22
Prune Land Bargains

1856 acres eight miles from Salem
on Main Rosedale road 65 acres Inn
proved including "a acres of orchard
of which 16 acres are bearing. Bal
ance mostly timber. Good house and
new barn. A splendid proposition
for large commercial orchard at
only 800 per acre,
20 acres seven miles south of Sa-
lem on main road; Az acres two
year-old prunes; liz acres ready
for trees and four acres fine timber.
An ideal small orchard site. The
price is cheap
We consider all of the above as
EXTRA GOOD
and will gladly show any OF them
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

All of the following are south Of
Salem in the famous Red Hill prune
district,
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

SO acres IL miles from ROsedale.
All cultivated except Is acres good
timber. Lies well and is an ideal
site for a fine orchard, 500 per acre,
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

Marshfield has the road building
fever.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

Work on Albany's big flye-story ho-
tel has begun.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22
REAL ESTATE BULLETIN
E. HOFER & SONS
INVESTMENTS

No. l4S 11h acres all in cultlva-
tion about S5a miles from center of
town. Two acres orchard. Finest
black soil, On good main road.
House and barn are not very good
but the property is cheap at $4,000.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

Journal want Ads" Bring Results
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

No. LAG. One block of ground in
South Salem, only a block from Lin
coin school. Five room cottage with
modern improvements and barn.
Lots of bearing fruit trees on place.
Price, $500.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1912-04-22

No. 70. Six room house and lot
5OxlOO on l6th street, 11s blocks
from State Lots Of fruit trees.
House in fine condition. Full base
ment Price $1,000.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
The Protective Humbus


II hiss been proven chat there pract-
ically Is no industry in this country
that really needs the benefit Of =
protective tariff rs those who are
clanoring for the benefits for pro-
lection are selling their goods in the
foreign countries where of course
they have to compete with the
foreign manufacturer, and II they
can pay the freight across the ocean,
and meet the foreigner and under
sell him on his own ground, they
certainly need no protection in COM
peting with the foreigner at home.
The Democrats are going to end the
humbugory of protection and 1t is
regretted that the necessity for re-
venue with which to run the govern
ment will not permit lower reduce
ton in the tariff than is contempla-
ted.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
l Ed Taylor Out Of Hospital

Mondays Denver papers brought
the glad news that Congressman Ed
Taylor and wife had sufficiently inn
proved to leave ST. Joseph's hospital
aud go to their rooms at the Shirley
hotel.
Al previously noted In these col
nmhs, Mr.. and Mrs. Taylor had made
all Arrangements to proceed to WASH
ington prior to the opening Of the
present session of congress; they. had
reached Denver when 1t was found
nscSssary to operate on Mrs. Taylor
for 5 bad case of appendicitis; she
vs. still in dangerous condition
whsn Mr.. Taylor was taken down
vita the same trouble. The many
friends Of our able and hardworking
congressman and his estimable wife
wilt be glad to hear that both sue
cssaSully passed through their dan
gsrous and trying ordeals.
Although friends are urging Mr..
and Mrs Taylor to go to southern
California for rest and recuperation,
forIthe balance Of the winter, Ed has
declared that he will go to Washing
fous a. soon ~ he is able to travel,
and hpskie down 70 hard work for
the remainder Of the congressional
session.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
For Good Roads

Last Sundays Denver papers con-
tain an itemized statement showing
how the state highway commission
propose spending $l,s5OOOO on the
p1$llc highways of the state. OF this
SUD the commission proposes to
spshd on roads In which Rio BlAnco
comfy is Interested:
Craig Meeker road, $4,000.
ecker Rifle road, $4,000.
ecker to the Utah state line (the
lower White river road). 42O,OO0.
hese are goOdly sums and ought
TO g1ake big showing on our roads
II Ipnestly and intelligently expend-
cd
neither this money is to be APP
pr1Priated in connection with . like
appropriation by the counties named,
ID Pt made apparent.
not dollar of this money should
b tpent until the ground is gone
ovSf, viewed and the best possible
right Of way and grade selected, and,
mae permanent. Start the work
rie$t and the taxpayers will get
sos1e real value for the money ex~
peHded.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
The Coming Year

Before another issue comes around
1912 will have passed into history,
and 1918 will be ushered In with all
Its omens Of good and i'll ahead Of It.
The year 1912 has been m0mcn-
tous one for the people of Rio Blanco
county. Prosperity has been the
rule In every line. An, unusually
rainy season made good range con-
ditions and thousands Of head of fat
beef were turned of at record high
prices. Everything points to . con-
tinuance Of high priced beef.
Crops Of all kinds have been abund-
ant; and while the prices for grains
are not as high as in former years,
the yield and acreage have been
much greater. In brief, Rio Blanco
county people were showered with
many blessings during 1912.
And the prospects for 1918 are
equally bright.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Notice to stockmen

The Colorado Midland will have
extra Pullman equipment on train
l08 which leaves Rifle at 4.06 p. M,
Sunday, January 10, 1918, to accom-
modate passengers going to Denver
to attend the stock show. This train
will also carry reclining chair cars
and dining car. Don't forget the
date, January 10, 1918. Ask your
local agent or write r. f. Vickery,
General Agent, Grand Junction,
Colo, for Pullman reservations.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
First Methodist Episcopal Church

The subject Sunday morning will
be, "Misjudged' Providence"
Sunday evening the subject will
be, "Mormonism VS.. Americanism."
Everybody should hear Rev. Nue.
kolls on this subject In the evening.
Rev. Nuckolls has made q study OF
this important subject In its relation
to our government and will handle the
same in way that will be interest
ing.
There will be special music at both
services.
Fellowship for rich and poor alike.
"a homelike church."
RoBT. L. NGcKoLLs, Minister
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Lon Adams in Hands Of Surgeon

The last issue of the Rifle Telegram
reports
"a. H. Adams, Of Meeker, civil en-
gineer in the employ Of the federal
government, and during the past
year or longer engaged in survey
work on Divide and Beaver creeks.
and more recently establishing lines
In the Grand Valley country, with
several assistants, became i'll last
Saturday and was brought to Rife
for an operation. Mr.. Adams desir-
ed the services of DIR. French, Of
Meeker, and the latter came over and
performed the operation on Sunday.
The patient is doing very nicely and
many friends both at Meeker and
Rifle hope for his speedy recovery"
1.-THE latest report received by DR..
French shows that Mr.. Adams ID
coming along fine.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
As Usual

The county seat Of Routt is now
established permanently at Steam
boat Springs-where 1t should have
been years ago and the first term OF
court was held at the new seat OF
government last week. Speaking Of
court proceedings the Pilot says
District Attorney Gentry was on
hand early and had his cases prepar-
ed"
Sure! Gentry is always ready for
trial, as soon as court opens.
There were only three criminal
cases and all were convicted.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
watchnight Social

The Epworth League Of the Meth
odist Church, will give watchnight
social Tuesday evening Dec. 3lst, at
the church. There will be entertain
ment for all. Refreshments will be
served free. EVERYBODY is cordially
invited to come out and spend the
evening with these young people and
to enjoy yourself socially, in this
watchnight service.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Christmas and New Year Holiday
Rates---1012-l3

Account the above the Colorado
Midland will sell tickets from all
stations to Denver, Colorado Springs,
Pueblo, Trinidad and intermediate
points at one fare for the round trip.
Tickets on sale December %, "a, 25,
81 and January /. Final return limit
January 8, 1918. For further in
formation call on or write r. E.
Vickery. general agent, 352 Main ST.,
Grand Junction, Colo. Phone Jet 1l6.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Colonel Montgomery Improving

During the week q report reached
Meeker that Colonel Montgomery
had q relapse.
Later advices from Denver showed
that the Colonel was getting along a.
we'll Is could be expected and was
gradually gaining strength. 1t 10
hoped the coming week will see him
out Of the hospital.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28

An egotist is man who believes
that II he were to hide his light I'M
der bushel the whole world be in
darkness.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28

Vi St0o0 anu UaRo 10 hoAP
ing out the publicity" campaign, as
the following late notes will show:
Now would be an opportune time
for Roberts. the Meeker correspond
ent of the Denver daily papers, to vi
sit Craig. We can safely promise
him the time Of his life, and one he
will never forget.-Empire.
Northwestern Colorado's annual
Indian invasion is now in full force
and effect, with 'tbat Meeker man"
officiating rs the author of the de-
tails. The redskins are credited with
crossing the line from the White
Rock agency in Utah, and 'steen
thousand deer have been slaughtered
once again.-Rifie Telegram.
One of the best things that has APP
peared in print in this part of the
state for some time were four verses
from the pen of Herbert b. Gee, OF
Steamboat Springs, and appearing in
the last issue of the Pilot. THE Fell
low Out In Meeker" was the caption,
and Mr.. Gees wit was directed at the
chap that .'just turns loose and
write" about things that occur, and
oft times otherwise, over in Rio
Blanco county.-Rifie Telegram.
Recently stockmen met in Fruita
and organized a wolf bounty ASSOCIATE
ion due notice Of which was made In
the Mail Of that town. The Telegram
copied the item and gave proper Gre
dit, and then the far famed cores
pondent over at Meeker lust turns
loose and writes," cribbed the whole
article, and giving 1t local date line
sent 1t to the daily papers, from
whom he receives pay. as real item
OF news from Rio Blanco county.
The Record-Stockman Of Denver
next fell for the game and printed
the article last week under Meek
er date line and the ''endless chain"
is not yet broken.-Rifle Telegram.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28

The Farmers Home is now under
the management Of G. r. Bowler, Of
the Miller house.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Eggs! Eggs!!

The hens that lay. 1 have q few
8. G. Black Minorca cockerels left.
Choice t2.5O.-F N. JoHANTGEN.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
More "Publicity" for Rio Blancc

Our neighboring newspaper men
of Grand and Yampa rivers are help
ing out the publicity" campaign, as
the following late notes will show:
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
For Sale

New piano. Cash or time. Enquire
at this office. n8O
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28

Prices reduced. Good meals, s5c
ut Miller house.
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28
Will cure your cold
BROMO-FERRIN
while you sleep.
Moving Pictures

This week in addition to an extra
good lot Of pictures we have "Gau-
mont's Weekly" These weeklys are
the newspapers of the Moving Pic
ture world, each film gives all the
notable happenings of the week In
pictorial form, such as the great
events In sportdom, great accidents,
the doings Of the president and other
notables; also pictures of the latest
styles In ladies' costumes, from Paris.
There about eight subjects on each
film.
The next club dance will be given
The Meeker herald., 1912-12-28

The next club dance will be given
next Thursday.
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1912-10-12

Quite striking figure .u European
. politics Peter assentrd quickly.
f Dice Us suspected OF radical prociyi-
lies. and SIS stIl. 90 is rumorcd. au ac-
uv" p'otter against the existing mon
archy"
Very we'll" Sorrlu-c sald Vow
+ ii-tcn carefully Four months ago.
~'rdrNHr was living at the Golden
i..u, near Nice. be was visited more
'h.A once D. Marslue. introduced Lv
th" count Won Iieru The result ~
those visits WIS long series of cable.
grams 10 certain Political leaders In
America. Almost immediately. -hs
d sal'as" ~ Tho Maine was started.
I Now. Peter murmurod. YOU are
I really beginning 20 interest mo
This week Sorraugo went on. "it
is expected that th- result of ID. sal.
. wage works VIII he ms, known That
is 10 say. 50 is highly possible that the
. question OF whether thee Maine was
D blown uD from outsid" or inside. will
. Dee settled once and for all Now see
. what happens. Sirdcli,r returns o.
/ America. The Count Won ff-rn and
/ Prince M'rsire conc 90 America.
! J De- uWrh"s-e della Ncrmuo comes
! fn America. Tho Ducu,-,.c. STROLLER
I anl Nar-iuo are .ruu fhfs steamer.
I Doc Count Won Heu travels Ir tho
3 Lut.'ai.I only because lf was rerrrf
{ "t f."' S.rlDIi'r 90 f-n last minute
1 changed i.- mind AND Was travelling
/ it ...f boat lliy fh--. ti.r-- 1870 BOO
+ N"ir brain -.rIsI'.r. fhe Tuelas-,.
. Won ''"rH llr..l-. fl- rl 500. OBJ Doc
/ Maine. H.V Them l0 and uH1t sort Of
a. D.'..''. 1873 .ur-
D
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1912-10-12

that Won should be urkind 20 me Tor
the rest ~ the voyage"
Il could nor AFFORD that" She an
swered. forcing another smile OF am
relying too much upon YOU for com
partnership AM could ! trouble
YOU She atdcI "For the moment
need nav utI Slr pa-s,. there"
Peter sTraug mp and called the
Young woman. vhu was slowly pacing
thr deck. iir himself d.d not a. one.
return 20 Dis place Ue went instead
ih search OFT ~oErIrke. and IOIud h.m
90 hle sfaiDrDDM. suErIuEa H.s lg .nE
Ipuu couch. 100 sth smoking sIIf.
with French novel Boz DIS band and
an air OF cuutenuncut which was ale
most tatuous lIe laid down tle
volume az Peters entrance
Dear liarOr, hp murT1ured. why
/. this hastc' ~ one isl ever iu q hur-
~ upon "a steamer. Remember that
we can't uI Hssihiy get anywhere iu
less than eight DAYS and there b. I'D
task in The world nowadays. which
cannot b. accomplished Iu that time. DO
bunk
= presume you have quite auish.
cd Do said "if So. listen fo r.e.
am moving i1 the dlrl, 10 s ms
fault thnt ! tiaEtrr' py thc uerest
tccidru. have already committed o
hideous iluE pas. You ought to have
What do vor mrar--
-, u ,.ate sr. E.u fa uc wrhrsso Of
The eye. .l s.-f.rra steamed for
ui.i"'ni H.f r.... sfl
"Wt ru'' d.. .... IS eD0I
NAM r'gl." arc ui.Ir. 1H.H b. l'
IS one of t." str..-..' ...r.- . h1ve
ever heard 90 .'."" .....a .... Hr......
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1912-10-12
w

sell out TO thefull extent o. his Efean
or chair. consider ourselves at sea
i trust. my friend. that you are feeling
quite comfortable
Peter. Baron de- Crost. lying at his
ease upon a neighboring chair With q
pillow behind his head a huge fur
coat around his body. and a rug over
bis feet. had all the appearance Of be
ing very comfortable Indeed HIS re-
ply. however. was little short al
most peevish.
Il am comfortable enough for tho
present. thank you Heaven knows
how long II will Last"
Sogrange waved his arms towards
the great uneasy plain OF blue sea
the showers OF foam leaping Into tho
sunlight, away bcy onf the disappear
ing coast OF France.
last" he repU.a For eight days
i hope. Consider. my dear baron .
What could be- more refreshing. more
stimulatisg to our jaded nerves than
this?"
''That IS all very we'll" Peter pro.
tested. but ! have, left several other
things behind. too"
"As. FOR Instance" sogrange in
Iuired genlally
My wife. Peer informed him
Violet objects very much TO these
abrupt separations This week. TOO.
was shooting at Saxthorpc BESIDE.
nav lAfl NUuA hkf NuFI Z ulfA
disconcorting 10 be called out OF
bed In the middle 81 the night 20
answer long distance telephone call
and told to embark on a White Star
liner leaving Liverpool early the next
morning. o. may be your idea Of q
pleasure trip. II isn't mine
Sogrange was amused
Anything elFc2-
Nothing much. except that 7 am
always seasick.' Peter replied de-
liberate,y
sogranee laughed, softly. but with
out disguise
Who said anything about a pleas
ure trip" he demanded
Peter turned his head
You did Nol told me whom We
came on al Chorbourg that You had 20
20 10 New YORK 10 look after some
property there. that things were very
quiet In London aud that You hated
travelling alone Therefore. YOU sent
Tor me AZ "a few hours notice
is that what ,old you Sogrange
murmQurcd
Yes Wasn't II true" Peter
asked. suddenly alert
Not word ~ H." SOgrange ad-
mitted 1T is quite amazing that YOU
should have believed It for "A mo-
ment"
Il was fool" Peter confessed
you see ! was tired and a little
cross. Besides. somehow or other. !
never associated trip TO America
with"
Sogrange interrupted him quietly.
but ruthlessly
Lift up the label attached 70 the
chair next 70 yours Read 10 out TO
me"
Peter took IL IN his hand and turned
A q
him
Hern- Bernadinei'
Just So SogranEe asseuted. Nice
clear writing. isn't ~"
Peter sat bolt upright in his chair.
DO you mean 90 say that Bcruadine
IS on board"
Sogrange shook hts head
by the exercise. my dear Baron d"
be said. of a superlativc amount Of
ingenuity. J was able 10 prevent that
misfortune. Now lean over and read
the label on the next chair"
Peter obeyed.
La puchessc della Nermlno." ne
announced
SOgrange nodded.
Everything just as 30 should De-"
he declared. Change those labels.
nv friend. as quickly as you can"
Peters fingers were nimble. and tho
lhinE was done 600 few seconds.
so ] am to sit next the Spanish
lady De remarked. feeling for his
tie
Not only that. but you arc 70 make
friends with her SoVraurn replied.
is she. Peter asked. aux'ously.
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1912-10-12

YOU will permit sa- De begged 4
'fH[tl iHeos nit" have lived - Long
20 England that have Permitted nv
rs,t ne -ane o., On Erenshmsn /
en- travelling lnt-r The name = ~
lanes lau-t aw.
r-ary- us-,-I IN .h- fns.rtiai,..'
20 claim uv lights a. a clr-espofi a.
.as utnsef - ne u9able-Four ne
Count Won Hem rrf- menace o. Ger
'r ~. s,..-,.- -s --s-H &C.. ~,
come o. yvu Openly ,.alm yu.r asa.
uut YOUR 'rnitN
let u~ lr.v--ttrI or- anotne-
clearly g. grange sail You c.a.ri
our AID ir what
NJ furrnawr glanced around che
sailor ANA lowered hi~ voice
Ihi"N ia ~ u-t r'rs H.H-" 90
braEarEn ans thr Federation 90 POW
81 10 ..t s,a.n ~ %, NV, "~n l.1 -,
7 urrt- Peter was ..ar.r forward ia
his place. deeply interested
our active ans toward such an
end. ~'Frn~E~ rH'I az last Us i'm.
possible Ttr Society 90 fH. rftur rr-
-Four t""s r.t Interfere 800 fN. domestic
Then DE- u.- ask fnu WHY erI YOU
/ upon tfis ~t-aur- NJ fa0-HHw- ar-
I WHrtsi 800 tone o. suppressed a
/ rit'W~nf cone Del driven to conclude
/ that 20 - 'Hur intention Co interrrt- To-
/ terfer.nce Sogranre rstlt-d smooth
" Win every dn- respect 90 yuu.
. Prince. there ur" great interests iu-
I NDlN"i co. chile move nf rr.r-
Th. Prince was a. hIs man hst fo-
J on h.- large features and bearded
I a." DIS ''tf-S-.H r was o." expression
! of rcsN.sh ami pass tomato child lie
/ controlled himself with 900 cn.f'
Marquis. n~ sails 'fN'e u.s. rerss-
.art ny that - ST. necessary that
Serfanr" nodded Hprrovinsiv.
IT. Dr. wei spoken. h' rtt iu' poe
n.t"'tr in' Baron d" Frost re7reF-
! "uts ENGLAND and the English inter
eats 90 .lr Society
T." Prince ~ Marshes face WIS
| not Pheasant tn look uyor
! mn t' birth. Baron. he said. turn
Inc towards Hin. bur a more interest
ftlan Frsi1rl hos never existed ir -h.
pages ~ htetur- Sfr must have A
ttE"r lu every Die. Ta""'
I-ter leaned over from his place.
WHAT ahoH' Germany Mr Fam
shave. De asked. with ernuHasis
". a IttIe nonpiussed.
/ The Count Won Ueru" be ,.nf-ssatL
I 'has been q good friend to rue. This
Dos liable ana taN9raoiE inclined To-
/ wards INV family The whole affair i-
90 bis DESIGN one must reward ones
r- added with a meaning glance at
Peter. WAY other helpers should n't
be- .., airnittgf
'I.t On irfn. i,,sr , ma H .,. IS
or lt-'f absolutely inimlcal 10 the Do
M ,4n,fN
!.ns ta. table h~f"T" I'M. - d.. true
N.rd o." ,C'r.tn' Won ii.,ql s.. '.rt ''ii,
s,.v -r. ..-. ~ an ..,-..,,,-, ir,t
lo S hive 'I s "oaa1 VIEW w .i'''r rI na
sf D. ma. l' '' ~ ''~,
b 90 .'tH t.A. .'I q. ~ l' i'7
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1912-10-12

I y may now" SOgrange re-
marked. buttOninE Up his
ulster. and stretching him
To thefuli extent % his steam
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1912-06-06
QUAKER

[From the Philadelphia Record.1
A man is never too old to learn the
latest wrinkle.
Health is wealth, unless you happen to
be a doctor.
The longer a man lives, the more he
grows like his old self.
Even the waste basket demonstrates
that there is plenty ofzroom at the top.
The most uninteresting people in the
world are those who have never made
any mistakes.
The man who claims that his conscience
never troubles him must have it pretty
well trained.
Two mediums through whom we com
mune with the spirits are the cI~airvoyant
and the bartender.
No, Maude. dear; we don't believe it
would improve the young man with mar
row shoulders to dress in broadcloth.
Wigwag-"Well. there is no accounting
for tastes" Guzzler-"Huhi 1 can al
ways account for a dark-brown one IN
the morning"
The people who stand on may
not be exactly comfortable, but at any
rate they are better than the people who
sit all over YOU
Wigg-'You seldom hear of a woman
who thinks before she speaks" Wagg-
mo she would have to be a lightning
calculator to do that"
The wa of the transgressor is hard
quoted the Wise Guy. WHY shouldn't it
be?" demanded the Simple Mug. Its in
the beaten track"