The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1912-10-24
Universal
FurniSherS
INCL
By Frank III. Williams

get 1t.
OUR PRICES ARE MERELY
NOMINAL.
What you want furnished when you
want 1t. Give us trial.
UNIVERSAL FURNISHERS GNCO
That the ad thatll bring emil"
Sam Culbertson, the aged president
and practically sole owner of uni
versal Furnishers Qnc.)," spread
the morning paper before him on his
handsome new desk and leaned back
In his richly upholstered new chair
He ran his hands through his scant
locks. screwed up his far from hand
some face and winked at Sallie Jor-
dan. his pretty stenos rapher.
"This'll be the best little graft
ever worked"
Sallie looked far from pleased at
this announcement. Sam laughed
loudly at her expression.
MY dear girl" there was vast
condescension in his voice. 81 call
everything | do graft There's
nothing wrong about the scheme.
You needn't feel at all worried, even
# you have got one share of stock
and even If you are one of the incor-
porators. Neither does Bill. the Of
flee boy, need to feel worried. though
he's got a share and is also one OF the
incorporates. No one need feel
worried, because this business is go.
ing to be fair and above board, and
it'll be about the only square thing
I've been In for 20 years.
But why do you call it graft
them" Sallie spoke timidly. She was
fresh from business college and this
was her first position.
Il call everything graft, but that
word is good in this case, because it
will be something of graft in the
prices I charge the customers. You
see, people who are so anxious to get
things that they will employ pro,
fessional getter to get them, will pay
almost any price if the getter is sue
cessful. That's where the graft comes
in. All, Sallie, it will be wonderful
what prices We can charge our dear
customers and still get away with II"
But you say our prices are nomi.
raj" Sallie's voice indicated her In.
dignation
my dear little church-worker, our
prices are nominal-camparatively
nominal We will scale them nicely
to what our customers think the
thing we get for them is Worth. Now
its all fair and square-just forget
your Puritan conscience for a time
I'd hate to have one Of my fellow
incorporators out of sympathy with
the plans OF the business. All, here's
our first batch of mail"
Sam took the three letters extended
to him by the pcstman and opened
them rapidly. It took him but mo-
melt to digest their contents.
Three orders already, Sallie
That's fine. Wen just stop adver
Using until We get these orders out
OF the way. 1t would never do to
burden the company with too much
business at the start. Here's q man
In room 314-that's on the third floor
of the Portland flats. He's making
a collection Of hats and he wants one
worn by an American soldier in
the Revolutionary war. Hum, that
ought to be easy, Here's another
from Rudolph Erickson, OF Jefferson
street Rudolph wants key that will
open a six-by-four trunk used by his
grandmother. That's explicit, isn't it?
Guess better call him up and get
fuller details-he gives his telephone
number And here's the third one
some fellow by the name of Ernest
Randolph Ernest will not confide his
desire to his letter. he wants to see
a representative Of the company
tell you what. Sallie you go up and
see Ernest. I'll be so busy with these
two other cases that | won't have
time to work him for graft. Be sure
and get a good fee from him-thats
the important part you know-a big
fee"
Sallie was inwardly rebellious at
being connected with any concern
which even savored of graft, but she
was exceedingly anxious to make
little money by working in an office
so she had no thoughts of resigning
After all the business was really lie
Ultimate. and for her part she decided
as ;Le walked toward Ernest Ran.
do.ph's address she would charge
nothing but perfectly honest. mod
crate fee.
When Sallie returned to the Office
she found Sam sprawled back in his
chair and looking the picture of de
spondency.
This is the limit" Sam fired the
remark at her the moment she en-
tered the room. Here I've incor.
porated for 81 900 and really put 5000
In the company. which I've put into
office furniture. and now Il looks like
was up against a brick wall. This
thing isn't going to go so we'll as !
thought It would Now you'd think
il wouldn't be such laundering hard
lob TO find hat worn by an Ameri
can soldier In the Revolutionary war
and the key to a six-by-four trunk
which mans grandmother used and
which he doesn't want to break. but
which, also, yet once more, he wants
to find out what's inside of 1t. But
let me tell you right now. young
lady, that It's one deuce OF Job
If charge these fellows what their
Jobs are really worth I'll put both OF
EN- in the bankruptcy court don't
believe I'll ever be able to find what
they want. The business is on the
blink. This concern will never be