The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1912-02-27

noe had give ache other tn high sign
iv two men in -akel station ~ life.
ye'd stick out ye'er fist at him an
say. PLACED to meet ye. II ye dld
I'd have to throw We into tn sthreet.
| wud so. Whin a free born Amerl-
can citizen meets a king or amy "
his family tn idee is he must duck
as deep as he can without losin his
balance an buttin' tn rifle parsonage
N tn stomach. How far he'll go
over depinds on his build. A man "
my shape wud be required to do no
more hin sink his chin into his col
lar till it hurt. But a little, thin
fellow like ye'ersilf must bend over
till his back is all but broke. An
We mustn't open ye'er mouth. mind
We, or ven be thrun out, onless tn
king asks We to. If he taps ye on
tn shoulder an says: Say some
thing. me man. ye can cut loose TIL
he shOVes ye away.
.'Th' exercise with American ladies
is more severe. Whin an American
lady is up against rilety it's entirely
proper FIR her to swoon away. Nanny
have done so, but it's not often prac-
tised because iv its inconvenience.
TIL fright an conservative thing fr
her to do is to pretlnd to suddenly
lose her left leg an sink as near to
tn flure as possible without fallin'.
She cant AVE amy outside assist
ance. II she grabs holt iy a chair
she's out. It's up. to her to detarmine
what her strenth will stand. If her
lilety is greater thin her agility
she's in FIR a bump. On tn other
hand, If she don't go down as deep as
she can h reakin' something
she need niver come ar-round again.
I see that wan New York lady has
practiSed this in a gymna-
SUM till she can dhrop tn left knee
to tn flure wan hundred an fortv-
five times without losin' a button. "
course it won't stop here. TIL king
iv England himself is comm to this
country next yea an US Americans
arr too devoted to tn throne to mig
lict amy exertion no matther how
dangerous to show how we feel. A
mere ginuflexion may be good enough
fr a Jock, but whin tn rale article
arrives we'll show him what a young
an active people can do in these here
gymnastics. I expict to r-read In tn
pa-apers this spring: Mrs Sold-Jint.
wife iv tn we'll known (wholesale)
plumber, is practising a handspring
which III will do whin PRESENTED to
his majesty. Mrs. Lottson will rely
on her cillybrated crouch an spring.
Mrs. Van Rhinestone will do a head
spin.' But tn ladies iv tn older ar
rystocracy will prob'bly stick to TIL
simple customs iv their ancestors an
go by his majesty on their hands an
knees
II wondher how it's all goin' to
come out. Hinnissy. Since tn news
got around iv how we'll we threa,
kings in this country livery potintate
in tn wurruld is gettln' r-readv tc
come over here on a spree. Suppose
tn king iv Beloochystan shud take
1t into his head to pay us a visit. II
Hogan Is tellin' mo tn truth. tn
ony way We can approach this here
monarch is be wrigglin' up on zee,
stomach. An we'd have to do it o,
maybe he'd niyer come back"
They ought to be ashamed /,
thimsilves,' said Mr.. Hennessv.
Sure. what difference does i
make?" said Mr.. Dooley. doc Lar.
: kin says it's good fr thin. Says he
: If they do it often enough twill ray.
jooce tn weight an tbs fine fr tn
abdominal muscles. II as mann,
: kings comes here as their pres
agents promise, these here nobly
BORN ladies will get almost as mucI
exercise as if they did tn fam'l,
washin'."
What wud We If ye were a king an
come to this counthry?" asked Mr.
HenneSy.
well" said Mr.. Dooley, there
S wan thing I w%udden't do. [ Wud
S dent r-read tn Declaration iv hide
t pendence. I'd be afraid I'd di
Z lauEhin'."