davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
Sridht Boy,

A certain business man of Rochester is of the opinion that he has an exceed ingly bright office boy, and nothing pleases him better than to tell how he acquired the youngsters services. A notice had been posted in the mans shop window which read as follows: Boy wanted about fourteen years" A lad of that age. with little that was prepossessing in his appearance, came into the office and stated that he had read the notice.
 "So you think you would like to have the position" asked the merchant patronizingly as he gaZed at the lad over the rims of his spectacles.
 Yes. sir" was the reply; q want the job. but I don't know that I can prom ise to keep it for the full fourteen years"
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
@ to BIaizs's

When you think you are consigning Lore or any one who irritates you beyond endurance to d hot spot by telling him to go to blazes" if ap- pears that you are mistaken and that instead of being rudely abusive you are in fact merely bIandly polite. The explanation Is that once, in some far away time. there was good bishop named Blaize, who waS always readt to dispense wise and sound advice tu all applicants; hence it grew custom ary to sly "GO to buize's."- Washing ton Post
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
BOTH WELL SEASONED.
The Mn a Hotter Proposition Than
 the Beverage.

The Mn a Hotter Proposition Than
 the Beverage.
 One light not long ago Jim Corbett. John N>, Bratton, w. w. Denslow and other kliurru spirits were gathered about table in a New York cafe talk ing about the fight out in Reno, that is, the recent fight. Jim Corbett was telling about what he thought of the battle, and the rest of the party were extremely interested. One Michael Claffy, rich old contractor, had but ted in" on the strength of having met Corbett after the Sullivan encounter in New Orleans, back in the middle ages.
 At every statement of Corbett's Claf- fy would break in with some com ment. The rest of the gathering began to think of some way of making him keep quiet, and Bratton, looking about the table, espied a bottle of tabasco sauce. While Claffy's back was turned he shook several drops of the hot stuff into the old contractors glass of beer and urged him to drink up and have another" The rest of them winked and waited for Claffy to swallow the liquid fire. But he was too busy talk ing.
 Then Corbett, growing impatient, un- screwed the top of the pepper bottle
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
The Euralar's Prayer.

Sir Herbert Risley, speaking of the castes of eastern Bengal at a meeting of the Royal Anthropological institute, said a curious system of religious wor ship prevailed among a caste who were professional burglars. They made space in the ground, and a man then cut his arm and prayed to one of the earth gods that there might be dark night and that he might succeed in ob- taining great booty and escape cap ture.-London Standard.
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
IContinued from page Il

the hill, we are told. is Justice Blodgett' $ residence. Nearly opposite is the Major Webb place. The old house is gone Major Webb was noted man, an officer in the Revolution. George O. Peet of Canaan and Bridgeport represents his lineage. Looking north across the meadows we see the old church and the little village of South Canaan, and in the distance the Berkshire Hills. The road is fne-state road. We are at the peaceful, quiet village of the Falls. A look at the D. M. Hunt Library building and we are passing down through the financial district and under the railroad and alongside the great wall of the dry canal. whose epitaph, engraved on stone, reads Built in 1851" To it should be added : Been dry ever since"
 We are leaving the land of Canaan, and over the big iron bridge across the Housatonic to Salisbury town. This is the site of the first bridge over the Housatonic river connecting the two towns, built in 1744 and kpown as the "Burrill Bridge" Previous to that time the river was forded a little below. There were iron works formerly, on each side of the river, and paper was made near the falls, about 17S7.
 We stop few minutes to view Eye grate falls" always an object of in- terest then we reach the ruins of Ames- vile, where Horatio Ames made cannon in Civil War times.
 On up the river lived MT. John Adam and later George W. Peet-a nice old place. Next is the Ward farm, one of the best on the river, at the foot of Pros pect Mountain. This is one of the old places that stays in the family, formerly the home of John R. Ward. now owned and occupied by'his son, Edward. Some times we stop for little visit with MT. Ward-can't stop to-day must get these girls home before dark
 MT. Goggins is next, a "Fino old Irish Gentleman" who has solved the problem, "Does Farming Pay?" and under the hill beyond is the old Joslyn house where MT. Goggins. Jr.. lives. Evidently no race suicide here. We are at the Little place, another large farm with fine house and grounds, the home of Mrs. Little, widow of the late Robert Little and here we come to the part ing of the ways''-both roads lead to Canaan. If you wish to see the Berk. shire Power electric plant that lights the world-Harry E. Lyles, general super intendent-take the left we took the right, to cross and see the new iron Dutcher) bridge. The first bridge at this point was built in 1a60, near the Butcher place, from which it derives its name. We are in Weatogue, the old Indian settlement. The first white settlers purchased lands here of the Indians, about l720, and here is the old burying ground, (not Indian). It is re- ported that @ noted lawyer of New York and Lenox is the donor of the nice new fence that surrounds this old burial place.
 We are on Canaan soil again-on up the riverside and see the Indian cross ing" at the rapids; on up the hill to Eugene Roots corner, down the hill, across the Blackberry and home. The girls said "Thank you; we had a very pleasant time" The little horses. said Thank you," and MT. Briggs said Thank you" when we paid the fare.
 J. B. R.
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
They Were Stayers.

After a dinner given by Stephen Price of Drury Lane theater all the guests but Theodore Hook and the Rev. Edward Cannon retired. Price was suffering from gout,. but as they disregarded his hints to retire he stole off and left them in high talk.
 On the following morning Price in- quired of his servant. Pray, at what time did those gentlemen go last night?'
 "Go, sirT' replied John. They're not gone, sir. They have just rung for coffee"
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
Two of a Kind.

A person begging aims of Lord George Gordon said:
 God bless you, my lord! You and I have been in all the prisons in Lon don."
 What do you meanY cried Lord George. q never was in any prison but the Tower"
 'That is true, my lord" said the other" and have been in all the resi- London Tit Bits.
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
No Whiskers on His Sea Food.

Two colored porters paused to rest a moment on their mops in a down. town office building recently. Boy" said one, smacking his lips, did you ever eat mushratp' ''Mushrat? re- turned the other. "No; I never eat any mushrat. The only fancy sea food I ever fused with was lobster."- New York World.
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
Puzzled.

Mother (at lunch)-Yes, darling, these little sardines are sometimes eaten by the larger fish. Mabel (aged five)-But, mamma, how do they get the cans open n?-London Ideas.
Connecticut western news., 1911-01-05
The Truth,

Truth Is as clear as a bell" quoted the wise guy.
 "Yes, but 1t isn't always tolled," add e,l the simple Inug.-Philadelphia Rec ord
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Men Who Never UnveiI.

There Is a wandering tribe of the Sahara called the Tuaregs, a strange people, supposed by some to have de scended from the crusaders and dis tinguished by the wearing of wells, a custom that has occasioned much dis cussion. The Tuaregs guard their eyes against the glare of the desert by two veils, one rolled round the tenn pies and falling down in front of the eyes, the other reaching from the nos trils to the edge of the clothing, cov- ering the lower part of the face. All manner of learned arguments have been adduced to explain this custom, but hygiene is obviously the only mo- tive. This is shown by the statements of the Tuaregs themselves and by the sobriquet mouths for flies" which they apply to all who do not wear the veils. It is said that the Tuaregs never remove their veils, even at meal times. Indeed. they are so much a part of their wearers that any one de- prived of such covering is unrecog- nized by his friends and relatives.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Losing the Drop."

"When a man whips out a gun and get the drop on you there's nothing else to do but throw up your hands and let him have whatever he wants" :"
 That's where you fool yourself" said the man from the southwest If a man has the nerve he can face a gun and get away with it-sometimes. I remember seeing in a border saloon an Englishman pull a gun on a Mexi- can whom he had caught cheating in a game of cards.
 You give me back the money you've won from me or I'll blow your head off
 You wiil?' said the Mexican. look ing calmly into the muzzle of the Eng iishman's revolver. Well. you won't do il just now; that guns not loaded
 Whats that?' exclaimed the Eng lishman, turning the revolver toward himself to lock into the chambers. And on the instant the Mexican drew knife and planted it to the hilt in the Englishman's stomach New York Times.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Bradley aAter
ruF GOOSE alRl.

In preparing seusun's looking Tor their theatres, local manages must af- fer their patrons a Xaft9Ated a>sart- ment of attractions to appeal 10 their different inUanati1ns. One sVt prefers the opretbl. another comedy, Whte Net more ciamor for the musAcM dtam9. One class ot entertainment, however, appeals to neAriy att, that of romantic drama. Who among Us does not feel a thrill for the hero and heroine sur rounded by all the giamor of ardent love, beSet by critical situations, and narrow escapes from their several pre- dicamentS. Nearly all ot us in our day dfeaminGS have east our earthly bodies to the four winds and have, Tn our own imagination, imnoTtnltLed ourSelf as lhe hero or heroine of so4ne impossible romance. IL k just this sort of play which appeals 10 all ot us, love and romance. We cry or rejoice with the heroine, we place all our londest hopes in the hero, Knowing in the end he wili triumph, We rail at and tear the villain to shred, in fact, we see and feel ourselves every rart of the performance.
 It is just this sort os play that MeSSrs. Baker X Castle are offering patrons of the Bradley theatre in "fhe Goose Girl, 2 Geo. D. Bakers dramati. zation of Harold MaeOirath's 's well known novel, which comes to the Bradley theatre Wednesday, Oct. Is.
 MT. MacGrath's book attained q wonderful vogue ot popularity. It was one of the best sellers among fit- tion, and the play has already scored as great success.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Candle makina In China.

The manufacture of candles in China is no new thing. Years before the advent of the foreigner the na- tives made them by crude methods and used them i4 home and temple. Even today millions of candles are made by the old process of dipping. at which the old Chinese are very ex- pert. mixture of tallow and castor oil is first prepared and the operator, placing straw to serve as wick between each of his ten fingers, dips them into the preparation as many times as necessary to give the candles the desired thickness. After this they are set up on end against q board to harden and the straw wieks clipped to proper length. The finished prod uct burns well. gives q fair light k consumed slowly. and. best of all. in native eyes, Is very cheap. These can dies are usually made by small fac tories for sale to storekeepers, but many individuals still manufacture for family and temple use.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Astronomical Fact.

The diameter of the sun Is recsonaa at Ss2. .O0ey nliies. This diameter ow. ing to its loss of heat and the eonsa quent condensation. IS steadily being shortened though at very slow rata of course The whole solar. system the sun and all of its pianets-is nov. ing through space at pace estimat. ed at about 150,000.0OO of miles annn. ally. Those who are supposed to. know about the matter assure us that owing to certain causes, too, nnmerous and complicated to be dealt with in this place. the planet on which We live receives only the 2,25O-miilionth part of the heat that is thrown off by the sun. Even as it is the earth. receives annually from the sun an amount of heat that exceeds by a million times the heat producible by the combustion of 2S000o.O00 tons of coal.-New York American.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Business Before. Pleasure.

Pussy Man thurrying into newspaper office)-Ive lost my spectacles some where, and I want to advertise for them. but I can't see to write without them. you know. Advertising Clerk Qikegy to be business manager some day1-I will write the ad. for you. sir Any marks on them? Pussy Man Yes. yes. Gold trimmed, lenses differ. ent focus. and letters L. O. C. on in side. Insert it three times. Adyertis. ing Clerk-Yes.. sir. Ten shillings. please Pussy Man-Here it is. Ad- vertising Clerk-Thanks. It gives me, sir, great pleasure-very great pleas ure, to inform you, sir. that your spec tacles are on top of your head Pussy Mandy stars, So they are. Why didn't you say so before? Advertising Clerk-Business before pleasure, you know.-London Mail.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Why They Died.

Naturally applicants for life insur- ance may be expected to put as good face as possible on the reports con cerning relatives and the causes of their deaths but they sometimes make rather amusing statements. Some one has collected few of these which were originally published in the Brit ish Medical Journal:
 Mother died in infancy" Father went to bed feeling well and the next morning woke up dead" "Grandfa- ther died suddenly at the age of 103 Gp to this time he bid fair to reach
 ipe old age Applicant does not know cause of mothers death, but states that she fully recovered from her .a.t illness. Applicant has never been fatally sick" Applicants broth er. who was an infant. died when he was mere child" "Grandfather died from gunshot wound caused by an ar cow shot by an Indian" Applicants fTaternal parents died when he was child. Mothers last illness was caused from chronic rheumatism but she was cured before death" Father died suddenly; nothing serious. Jour nal of American Medical Association.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13

i)y, taftaHd denies absolutely the statements which ,haye appeared re- gently to the effect that Postmaster General Hitchcock had forbidden the sale of Red Cross seals. "No official ofCer has been issued on this matter,n saNs Df. Farrand. "On July lst the post office department decided that they could no longer carry mail matter which bore stamps or seals which re- stumbled postage stamps. Our design oi the Red Cross seal, however, has been approved definitely by Postmas- ter General Hitchcock and the depart ment and il does not come within the prohibitions of this order of July lst. IL hardly looks as if we were going to abandon the sale, when we have all ready placed the order for the printing of fifty million seals and for large quantities of advertising matter.
 "rhe Red Cross seal this year will be from a new design drawn by an artist in Washington, D. (. Every effort has been made 10 get as far away from the conventional design of stamps and seals as possible. The new seal will depict very pretty winter scene. The year is expressed in Roman nu- morals. The only other words on the seal are, American Red Cross, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year The corners of the seal, which will be square, are in white, thus giving the effect of circular seal when il is af. fixed to letters and packages.
 "It is very important that every one bear in mind that the post office de- partment will not carry any other non- postage stamps upon the face of the letter. Red CIoss seals may and should be placed on the back of letters and packages
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Thackeray's First Poem.

Thaekeray's momentous first appear. ance in print was satirical poem. published in the Western Luminary during one of the happy holiday times which he spent in Devonshire when still a scholar at the Charterhouse. A certain MT. Labor Shell was to have delivered speech upon Penendon heath, but the crowd refused to hear him. He had taken the preeaution however. to send copies of his intend ed oration to all the leading journals before leaving town, and these, of course. printed it. This ludierous in- cident inspired Thackeray to write a little jeu d'esprit entitled Irish Meo- dy," telling how Mister Shell" when the, men of Kent began a grievous shouting" found comfort in refieeting: My speech is safe in the Times 1 wot
 And eke in the Morning Chronicle
 Westminster Gazette.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Loaded For Economx.

fireman was up for examination for promotion to the position of engi- neer He passed a fair test on the rules and machinery, but during all of 1t the examiner was constantly lec- turing him as to the need of economy in the use of fuel and oil. so that by the time he finished his examination 1t was pretty well on bis nerves. Hay ing finished the technical part. the ex- nminer thought he would put the man in a critical position to see what he might do in an emergency. So he put
 hs question "Supposlng you are the eugireer of freight train on a single track. and roH are in danger of q head on collision with q passenger train. and you know tha, you could not stop vour train fhat collision could not be ayerted what would you do?" The nam. unstruns by the vigorous in Siruetion he ted received as to econ omy, repliel in this way: Why. I would grab the oil can in one hand and lump of coal in the other and Jump. mp."-AJehiSen Globe.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
A ssxrian Peasant suparatitlon

A lawsuit for libel brought by an apOthecary in Pollau. in Styria. against q young peasant reveals an extraordi- nary superstition prevalent among the country people. They believe that apothecarieS and doctors have the right to kill at least one man and one woman every year in order to make medicines out of their bodies. An ac- cidental movement of the apothecary at Pollau, Herr Kobermauser, when giving medicine to boy named Putz led the latter to believe he was going to be killed. He ran away, but got such fright that he fell ill The in- aabitants believed his story and boy cotted the apothecary. who was at length compelled 10 prosecute. Putz was sentenced to fourteen days i'm prisonment, but his parents. who had spread the story. were acquitted on the ground that they had acted in good faith-London Standard.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13


 Should citizen of the United Stat.- attempt to enter Russia witbont passport be would be turned baek .. the frontier. Should he arrive in D.. sian waters he will not be permir,a, 10 disembark until he has produead ts- necessary document. properly vised bs a Russian consular or diplomatic ofs cer. Indeed, the mere possession .of an American passport is not sufficiant for the regula tions of the Rnss,ars prescribe that the credential mnst 1o vised before the frontier Is crnssos Better to lose ones purse than ono,s passport in, Russia Funds may ha cabled for' and received in the coprso of few hours, but 1t Is auestion o. weeks whsre~a passport Is concerned Russian officials are usually eour,eou. 10 American visitors who. do, not Al, play toornnch curiosity about oerta,, unspeakaDie Russian institutions br, let them find "a ftraveler in the. inter,o,. without "a passport and the. lurkles. one will speedily see the inside of . Russian jafi,i and sooner or later ha conducted to the nearest point of tha. frontier.--Trayel Magazine.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
One Use of the Eel

It Is difficult to exhaust the uses of the eel Experts in top whipping pro nounce dried eel skin all admirable lash. and tops are by no means the only victims thereof. There is that affecting passage in Mir Pepys' diary. April q. l6ti3. Up betimeS. and with my salt eel went down ia the parlor and there gcf my boy and did beat him till was fain to take breath two or three times. Yet for all I am afeared it will make the boy never the better. he is grown so hardened in his tricks. which 1 am sorry for he heing capable Of making a brave man and is boy that and my wife love- very we'll" Salt eel'' appears to Nave been nautical term for a
 = -~d and it fl not certain that
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
euddist Priests Of Burma.

Every morning after sunrise the Buddhist priests of BRrma go out in Indian file, preceded by d boy with Q bell. which he rings at intervals. This warns the people of their approach. and It is wonderful 10 see with what reverence the people regard these priests, Immediately the bell rings a Burmese woman rHns out with her of terlng o1 Hte, bananas, eggs or the best that her house can provide. No words or greeting are exchanged. The offerings are made and received. in si- ienee. The Buddhist priests may not receive money. This is why they have To beg for their daily bread
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Cats In Ancient Wales.

An ancient statute ascribed to Howel the Good a Welsh prince, who ruled in 94S, regulated the price of cats. A penny was the price of kitten before Its eyes were open, twopence until 1t had caught it's first mouse and four pence when it was old enough for com granaries; forfeited either milk eve, with it's fleece and lamb, or as much wheat as would cover the body Of the cat suspended by it's tail, with its nose touching the ground X penny was coin of great purchasing power i'll the tenth century.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Wild Parrots Are Fiohters.

Parrots when in their native wilds live in flocks and guard themselves by a complete police system which en- ables them to marshal their collective force quickly when any animal or bird attacks one of their number. They seem to be disciplined and trained in fighting together. and all other birds and animals are afraid to attack a parrot unless the bird can be caught alone Even then a shrin call sum- mons the parrot army to the rescue. It is said that in the forests all par rots die of old age and that none is ever killed by birds of prey or other wild animals.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
Red Cross Seal Not Abolished

Not only will the sale of Red Cross Christmas Seals be continued this year, but il will be carried on along broader lines, and will be larger and more comprehensive than ever before, ' says Dr. Livingston Farrand, eSecu- tive secretary of the National Associa- ton for the Study and Prevention of Tuberculosis, in a statement issued by the press bureau of that organization.
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13

According to Order No. 907 q the Post Office Department subscri- bers cannot be indebted to a newspa- per more than one year and still have the paper sent to them at the second- class rate. The order reads as follows:
 "A reasonable time will be allowed publishers to secure renewals Of sub- scriptions, but unless subscriptions are expressly repeaDed after the term for which they are paid, within the follow Ing periods:
 DaiIies, within three months,
 WeekIies, within One Year, they shall not be counted in the legtii- mate list of subscribers, and copies mailed on account thereof shdH not De accepted for maitfng at the seeond- class postage rate of one cent pound, but may be mailed at the transient sec ond class postage rate of cent for each four ounces or fraction thereof, prepaid by stamps affixed
Putnam patriot., 1911-10-13
CaNs of The WeaL

While the Egyptians named the days 9I their week. the Jews numbered 4aeiA only. the first day of the week aeing always the day after the weekly sabbath. Fifteen different methods of sabbath counting are known to have eNisied during the last 1000 years. in 'ludlag every day of the week. weeks or different and varying length, from siX To ten days. and months of various and varying length.