davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Editorial Telephone, "THREE-ONE"
DORA BARRETTE, Society Reporter

issued the following notice: "a
civil service examination will be
held on January 8, at the old capt.
toll, St. Paul. The inspectors needed
for the dairy and food department
for the coming year will be selected
from those taking this examination. .
Mrs. 0. E. Bailey entertained the
following guests at dinner last ev-
ening in honor of Mr.. and Mrs. A.
K. Southworth, of Billings, Mont,
visiting Mrs. Southworth's mother,
Mrs. L. H. Bailey: Mr.. and Mrs. S.
c.. Bailey, Mr.. and Mrs. A. X South
worth, Mrs. L. H. Bailey, Miss Ida
Bailey, Miss Florence Smyth, and
Messrs. Harry Smith and G. C. Grip
pen. The evening was spent in play
ing cards.
What is more appreciated and ap-
propriate for New Years Gift than
a useful or interesting book. Get one
or more at Peterson's half price
sale.
A party in honor Of the seventh
birth anniversary of Margaret Car
son was given yesterday afternoon at
the home of her parents, Mr.. and
Mrs. G. E. Carson. The afternoon
was spent in playing games, and a
six o'clock supper was served, after
which the guests were taken to the
Grand theater. Those in the party
were: Alice Cameron Helen and
Blanche Mcdonald, Lorraine Kreatz,
Ada Warner, Carl and Mabel Tan
her, Margaret McCuaig, Eva White,
Blanche, Dolores Barnell, and
Lily Hovey.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
The Fighting Turk.

The Turk is great fighting man,
perhaps the best in the world-that Is.
on land, for as a sailor be has never
shone. He is great fighter because
he Is physically strong man. The
Turkish peasantry, from whom the
army is recruited. have to work hard
for bare living, and there is no
room among them for weaklings.
Therefore the Turkish soldier is capa-
bic of tremendous feats of endurance
and can live on nothing or next door
to it. Then he Is accustomed to fight
ing almost from babyhood. On the
frontiers and in the country districts
Of Turkey there is always trouble
going on.
Death in battle has no terrors for
him, for by bis religion it assures him
OF PARADISE London Answers.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Navajo Blankets.

Much unadulterated nonsense has
been written concerning the symbolism
of Navajo Indian blankets and the
poetry, legend. tradition and history
woven by the squaw into it's fabric
1t is true that some designs have a
symbolic meaning, but Hopi, Zuni and
Apache symbols are used quite as free
ly as those peculiar to the Navajos.
The Navajo squaw is one of the least
imaginative and least poetical of hu-
man beings, and it Is quite safe to say
that even when symbolic designs are
employed in blanket weaving it is
without the remotest reference to their
true Observation-Disclosures.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Wanted BY All,

When you see an elegant auto pass
by your door, your natural desire is
to be it's happy pOssessor. Just so
with any article on the market that
gives perfect satisfaction, everybody
wants it! Mascot flour always gives
perfect results and that means per-
feet bread. This flour secured first
prize in our late county fair, eventu-
ally, you will use it, why not now?
Schwandt e Marin. Phone 33.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Question For Question.

II shall discharge our butler" said
Mr.. Cumrox
whats the trouble?'
"He doesn't show me proper defer,
ence. When am paying a man nber,
ally consider it his duty to laugh at
my jokes" -"
And won't he?"
II don't think he can. He's an Eng
lish butler. When in spirit of gentle
and condescending badinage l said to
him, Hawkins, can you tell me which
came first, the chicken or the egg?' he
said, Which did you order first, STRIP"
|-Washington Star.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
The Thrifty French.


Every little while the French farm,
er or peasant sends a few francs as
savings to his banker in Paris or some
other city. The banker holds the fund
till there Is enough to buy a bond or
some other security, when it is ship
ped to the farmer or peasant and goes
into the family collection The French
savings bank is the stocking, and it is
stuffed with securities from all over
the world. -.as l. -tz
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Tranic Eano;lv Aie&nsv

The following inscriptions are to be
seen on tombstone at Debreczin.
Hungary: l.. . = -.
Joseph Moritz, murdered at sixty
two by his SON.. Isabelle Moritz wife
Of. above. poisoned at forty-seven by
her daughter. Elizabeth Moritz COM
m1tted suicide at twenty: after poison
Ing her mother. Joseph Moritz, Jr.,
murderer Of his father, died In prison
1t twenty-seven."-London Standard.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
AMnifiAs

'That gossipy Mrs Gladly has such
q mean, sneaking little dog for a pet.
Il suppose she took him out OF sym
patty" ia.
How do you mean T.
Why. isn't the dog backbiter
too Baltimore American.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Wall Street and Stocks.

= WIFI StESoC HNu 0IOCkS. =.
Probably 80 per cent Of the stocks
bought and sold for speculation on the
Stock Exchange are bought and sold
not upon conviction, but on example
A majority of the time it is true that
the strongest reason people have for
buying is that others buy, or vice versa.
New York Post.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
No Chance For Detection.

No Chance For Detection.
'Townley says you'll have to count
him out OF the theater party"
'Eh? What's the matter?'
Hes so hoarse he can't speak"
'TeIl him to come. anyway. You
can pair him off with the Gabber girl.
She won't give him a chance to say
word."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29

The root Of all benevolent actions Is
aliaI piety and fraternal love.-Con-
fucius.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29

Fixed to no spot is happiness. 'TiS
nowhere to be found or everywhere
Pope.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
:. 81
lonorance.

Mrs. Kaller-C Cooks are such ignorant
things nowadays. Mrs. Justwed -
Aren't they They can't do the sim.
plest things. asked Minis to make
some sweetbreads the other day and
she said she couldn't Washington
Star. MI 81 &
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29

1t is the enemy whom we do not sus-
pect who is the most dangerous
Rojas.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29

Despair alone makes guilty men be
bold.-Coleridge.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
.BEMIDJI BRIEFS
o o o o o o o o o o O o 90 Z
DAILY HEALTH HINT.
Causes of Aging Prematurely.

Causes of Aging Prematurely.
Rapid aging" writes an ex-
perinced physician, may bring
the man of thirty to the same
status of the one of seventy,
and, on the other hand, the lat
ter, by reason of inherited vigor
of constitution and right living,
may be physically twenty years
under his actual age. The in
heritance of poor structural ma
terial, dissipation and mental
strain are the chief factors in
early aging"
, @ O o @ o o o o O o o o @ O (
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1911-12-29
Big War Pictures at the Grand
Theater.

THE war in Tripoli," between the
Turks and the Italians will be shown
for two nights at the Grand Thea
ter tonight and tomorrow night.
Four other big productions will also
be shown. See full program else
where in this paper.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
SHE HOLDS 1T UP TO THE
Girl Who Studies to Beat the Men

energy to the same thing that absorbs
you-grade making. The men who are
too poor to go into the broad life of
the well-to-do collegian are almost in
variably obliged to give a part of their
time to self-support. So why get puffed
up about those high grades?
And you have given the intellectual
woman kind of black eye that is not
attractive You have so squeezed and
wrinxled yourself to become grind"
that your narrow interests and appar-
emily unsympathetic nature have come
to be blamed on all women of brain.
Uselessness Of Football
I do not believe in football, because
cannot bear to see a fine young male in
capacitated for future usefulness by a
kick in the wrong place. But 1 think
the senseless competition of grade get
ting has the cruelty and uselessness
of football beaten a hundred times.
Wake up, you man-beating girl! Take
what the college gives you: that suits
your need-as a WOMAN. And fling
the rest back in the faces of the facul-
ties till they are forced to afford you
an education which is adapted to your
needs. Make them let you learn to live
with people, not with books. Don't let
this man-beating excellence deceive you
to the fact that 1t is a first-class pulp
maker, grinding your distinctive self,
your woman self, to death!
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
MR.. PEEVED PROTESTS

Holy hominy, but I've got a head
acher' groaned Mr.. Peeved, as he lay
back in his morris chair and propped
his feet on the sofa But I don't
wonder This has been some day for
me-"
What have you been doing" in
quired his wife, as she deftly re-
moved his feet from the sofa.
Taking a flyer in high finance"
replied Mr.. Peeved. It's something
very seldom do, petty, but this
seemed like taking candy from a
baby, so put SIS on P. and L. when
1t was at 81 And by George, petty,
by 8 o'clock this afternoon. was
5000 to the good. P. and l. had risen
that much. But golly, it gave me
a headache following those quota
lions and trying to make some sense
out of the stock exchange lingo"
''Oh, you poor thing, exclaimed
Mrs. Peeved, solicitously. Did you
say two hundred? 1 know what 1t Is
to have a splitting headache myself
You poor thing"
And she lifted his feet to the sofa
again, and brought over two cush-
ions for his head.
Should I make you some hot lem
onade, John? It's the best thing in
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Reddy Smith on the
MeanneSs of Man

Did yu ever know, Jimmie, dat de
biggest crook gifts his spoils because
of de meanness OF human naturef
Course yu didn't; nelder did till de
udder day.
Brown uver here in de Mutual build
In is uh retail dealer in grain. Now,
he wonders why Jones. de wholesaler,
can sell him corn at two cents lower
dan Smith. Brown knows dat mos
Nv de profits in dis business is made
by skinnin de udder Teller, so he
buys uh bran moo scale, SOS tn see
dat he don't git no short weight
frum Jones. Jones is wise tn de
game, so he sends uh full load, which
Brown is satisfied with, after weigh
in de wagon when it's loaded an
when it's empty. Now, Brown didn't
send any Nv his men tn help unload
dat wagon-no, sir-he paid fur 1t
an de udder promised to deliver 1t,
so de udder Teller Guild unload it. De
udder Teller knew dat Brown was
dat way, so he puts 500 pounds Nv
sash weights in de lower bags. After
Jones workmen unload de grain dey
wrap dem weights up carefully wild
de bags an pile dem in de corner, an
fin sum excuse tn return fur dem
later.
OATS all, Jimmie: but IL sum people
wusn't SO mean maybe dey wuddent
git cheated-eh?
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

sides knowing it, made use of it,
which the philosophers say Is the
only thing knowledge is worth hav-
ing for.
May, be you saw that two by four
box of prunes that was decorating
the landscape in the rear of the
store2 Well, may be you didn't. but
they were there. The customers
couldn't see them either; you never
can tell how customers are going
to take prunes. Sometimes they're
just crazy about EN-, and then again
they're liable to remember all the
fool jokes they ever read about 'em
in the comic papers, and refuse to
look the poor little black things
in the face. That's the way they
treated this batch. Nobody would go
within two yards of the box.
Here's where the fresh paint comes
in, or gives a good imitation. For
there wasn't any fresh paint, only
a sign that read Fresh Paint" that
the boss stuck on the woodwork
back of those lonely prunes And
the customers flocked over, Of
course, to feel the wood and see for
themselves. That was our cue to talk
prunes. And as the poor defuded
customers were ashamed to confess
they were. there feeling the paint"
business In prunes looked up much.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

the world for you when you're feel
ing like that. Poor thing"
Yes. petty. I think a steaming hot
lemonade would touch the spot just
now. I'm just about played out"
What's P. and L.?" inquired Mrs.
Peeved, as she looked around for
another cushion. an oil mine-well,
I mean?"
It's a Railroad
It's a railroad, and just now no
body knows whether it's going to be
taken into the Pennsy or blown high
er than a kite. 1 took a sure tip
that the stock was going to rise
like sixty, and by Jimmy. hadn't any
more than put my money on 1t when
1t began to scoot skyward- Excite
ment? Vow
No wonder you've got a headache.
I'll go right down and fix up that
hot lemonade myself. Two hundred,
Ell? Have you got it with your"
No. That's the funny part of It
Just as 1 was going TO tell my broker
to sell. darn If the thing didn't go
down again Eastern 1t went up. And
by the time I got Strengthened out.
hanged II I wasn't loser by $20l
Where's the hot lemonade?"
There isn't a lemon in the house."
snapped Mrs. Peeved, as she lifted
his feet from the sofa again And
please see that you don't get those
cushions all mussed up"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Loretta's Looking Glass

You grind" you are deferrtng the
day of our real education. You are
making a martyr of yourself to furnish
data for the conversational ladies who
want to make speeches on 'woman's
achievement"
And you are NOT doing what you
think you are-beating the men. You
are just showing that by devoting all
of your energy-frequently sacrificing
your health-to study you are getting
higher grades than men who are play
ing football, tennis and taking an ac-
tive interest in fraternity or society,
debating and others. as we'll as dances
and week ends, and still keeping up
grades that let them stay In college.
You are NOT proving that you can
beat men who are giving their whole
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
THE STAGE DOORKEEPER

The stage doorkeeper carefully
drew a match across the mo Smok-
ing sign and started his pipe. Say,
kid" he said to the stagestruck youth
who has a meager job doing extra
gentleman" you sure do get next
to a lot of inside info in this Job. I've
been here man and lad for nearly
thirty years, but don't think ever
heard anything more interesting than
the dope I. overheard this afternoon.
Something Doing
-"ons of the newspaper inter-
viewers was down here to get little
bundle Of Maize Clare's history. He
got It all right I took him into her
dressin' room after the matinee, and
as I was of watch I fingered by the
door. Well, kid. 1t would o done your
heart good to have heard the twaddle.
1t didn't take much urging, and she
told how her grandfather was an earl
end had mixed in the Indian mutiny.
And how her father had got in Dutch
when he married her mother, who was
the daughter of a doge, or a Spanish
grandee, or something of the sort.
And when she got down to the part
where her family had to duck out of
Italy to escape getting mussed up in a
scrap there, why the interviewer
gasped. Her experience in Australia,
in the bush, he put down for half a
column, and her hairbreadth escapes
In Alaska he copied for another chunk
Of news. Say, it was great. Why, when
she looked up at him and told all the
pretty little secrets of her childhood
you couldn't help wondering how one
so young could go through so much
and still retain her beauty. Revolu-
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

the face of the poor but honest bank
president, he certainly looked II.
Sign the papersp'
He knew something about the bank
president, and the bank president
knew that he knew.
The aged man took the pen in his
trembling fingers.
IT WILL" he faltered.
BUT:
"Coisesr' Kissed the villain. 'T-
I really must beg your pardon. I'm
usually such a good villain, too,
that 1 don't see how 1t could have
happened. I've forgotten the papers!
With more coises, he stealthily
withdrew, and the bank president
wiped the dew from his low but
honest forehead and rang for ice
water .-.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

} lions. doges. grandees, bushmen. cow
boys and Indians Just slipped by in
her history and made no visible i'm
preston on her beauty.
THE newspaper guy sure did get a
good story and the manager is tickled
to death. / wouldn't be surprised If
Maize got a couple of bucks more
after next week If the boss decides
to run a summer show.
There she comes now. Some class
to that chicken, eh, kid7"
Yes" responded the awestruck
extra gentleman" with the STACEY
ambitions, but who is that man with
herr
The stage doorkeeper yawned and
replied: "Oh, that's her father. He
runs a saloon down on Eighteenth
street. Him and me run foot races
together when we was lads in County
Clare"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
REAL, EXERCISE

You must take exercise" said the
physician. THE motor car in a case
like yours gives the best exercise
that -- a..
But, doctor, can't afford to keep a
motor car" the patient growled.
Don't buy; just dodge thenl," said
the other ~ .
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
THE REASON

Warden-So you moved No 12s.
What's the matter? He seemed to be
very quiet and docile.
Assistant was afraid he'd tear the
sail down. You see, learned that he
was graduated in the same college
class as No. 1873 and that they were
planning a reunion for tonight.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Light Testing
For DIVERSION!
ENGLISH Joke FOR TODAY

"A curious barometer used in Ger
many and Switzerland consists of a
pan of water with a frog and little
stepladder in 1t. When the frog comes
out Of the water and sits on the steps
It is said infallibly to indicate rain"
London Evening Telegraph.
a"And when IT climbs down into the
water II will be wet a1n."-Punch.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Keenly Observant

do you think that college professor
is correct in saying poverty will be-
come obsolete?''. -.r
1T shouldn't be surprised" replied
Mrs. Comrox, Il note even now that it
is very questionable"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
WHEN NOAH WAS A BOY

He went down to the five and ten
drachma store and bought jack in
the box Then he sent 1t to his
mother by express collect. When she
opened it she tainted dead away. 1t
was considered a good joke in them"
DAYS
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

should husband how long should he shut his
and to suspicious circumstances?
admits received $4,000 from Robert
his puposed alienation of his wfe's
declared he did when his wife
big beautiful clothes refused in New York
he also that he believed what his wife
still rtera and that that Hoes friendship for her purely
platonic and that she in fact his ward
Christopher Bergen county tesifes that
his wife told him she
another finally brought verdict of $1,000
defendant appealed and the
supreme $300O declaring that first
much for love.
The third is which the wife declares purely and
simply fixed" money, and has yet be settled
Tragedy For Cupid
tragedy Cupid, isn't nowadays
reached the commercial when be baeed the highest
bidder? spiritual dthe side makes
exist draw Of aony
with wedding license and husbands price their wives
loyalty?
And what isn't always high appreciation Of his wife
that big his suit but usually greed
according themselves for they declare the who really
his wife be repaid for losing her and while he
kill fight the other and seek divorce he does
ask be paid for his "boken heart"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

AM not understanding. want you
to have the poor pay of your wreath
l. for all you have done. But I DO
complain of you. I bitterly resent the
slur you cast on my sex.
Slur? Yes, I mean just that! know
you think by making grades that are
higher than the ones made by men you
are showing the superiority of girls to
men. But you are not. You are just
showing your ability to do SOME of the
things men do as well or better than
they.
Unlucky Thirteen
Just now a lot Of mistaken girls are
gloating over the Cornell triumph. They
are shouting forth the glad news that
thirteen of the twenty-five eligible for
Phi Beta Kappa are GIRLS. If there
ever was an unlucky thirteen, that
certainly is it!
It is another bit of fertilizer for tina
root of that malignant growth of sex
antagonisrn. It's a regular scholarly
nightshade.
Why do we crow over doing things
that men do better than we? In our
growing enthusiasm we are losing sight
Of the fact that we are accepting a
masculine education as If 1t were OF
all things desirable instead of forcing
the colleges to get practically busy in
adapting their teaching for feminine
needs.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Cnrnnlicafed

Where's that umbrella I lent your"
Jones borrowed it. Why?''
"Oh, nothing. Only the fellow Dor
asking him for It.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
Our Grocery Clerk
Says, Have a Prune?

Everybody knows that fresh paint
has as irresistible an attraction for
human beings as molasses has for
flies. The point is that the boss, be-
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22

he's little
make deaf country
in Shakespeare
Anyhow he's got the reputation and the thousand
people that paid their good him last night settled
themselves behind their op glasses with the fixed idea that he
gon make them laugh till hurt So the second he
his pathetic lookn face the front that
didn't lose worth if she could help it, started
cacke before Jefferson Daniels had open
mouth the whole house
Mamie Couldn't See 1t That Way
And that's the they kept all evening envied em,
Belle ben able to have such good time all that supposon,
but the harder tried somepn that the
came to weePn If he had good jokes which doubt the
Lady the Limousine ben musical comedy nobody heard
eybody started laugh before the
Belle that couldn't make fac The people
that laughed prob1y much good of thed been
somepn laugh but the point by etchn their magaons
little bit they couda had good gancin'
Jefferson Daniels the little while and
roarn the empty
Mrs Flynn another example o the power of reputation.
Mrs Flynn took glasses about
she's
in reality every book agents
chaks welcome the
the the profession Yet when she the butcher shop
with those glasses and that the butched
think y fool her with anything but his choicest steak
he would O fyn.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
The FOiler Fooled;
Or, A Bias Villain!

''Har! Sign the papers,
Even without the har, no one could
mistake him for anything but a viii
lain. He was a bold, bad villain,
and as he f1ourished his revolver in
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-05-22
NJ A ME TELLS BELLE
A Man Doesn't Have 10 Worry Be-
cause He Can't Deliver the Goods
THEREPUTATION'S THE THING

IL and I took in The Lady in the Limousine"
last night Belle. Jefferson Daniels is the come
dian, and he did everything but make me laugh.
Not that he didn't bring the house down-they
went crazy him, as usual not because he
funny, which he wasn't, but because he's got
the reputation o bein' funny.
They're great things, Belle-reputations. For
all practical purposes, I'd just as soon have one
pension any day. I don't know how Jefferson
Daniels ever got the reputation O bein' funny.
Maybe, way back in the days when there wasn't
any candy boxes the backs of the seats, he