davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
THE PESSINiIST.

When the sun isn't bright and the
sky isn't blue,
And no one is friendly or jolly or
true,
And the easiest lenders refuse to
come through,
And life seems bust and a flivver;
When you haven't an appetite-even
for pie
And you dismally moan that you wish
you would die,
Don't fancy that nature has gone all
awry,
It's something gone wrong with
your liver.
When the girl that you love prefers
somebody else,
When Fate picks you out for his wal
lops and welts,
When your luck seems as bad as one
7. Roos- e-velt's,
And you think you will jump in the
river;
Don't do it-although you may think
you're accursed,
And you find that the best you can
see is the worst,
Go hunt up a good, able doctor man
first
1t isn't your luck; it's your liver.
When the books that you read seem
uncommonly bad,
And the musical plays are pathetic
and sad,
And the jokes of your friends drive
you perfectly mad,
And Caruso seems merely to chat
ter;
Don't turn on the gas in your flat
not Tonight
Just chirk up bit for a while and sit
tight,
Day after tomorrow you'll find you're
all right
Your liver-that's all that's the
matter.
-. j. ]. Montague.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
MASCULINE FASHIONS.
(Kansas City Journal.)

NAdilSeio Slby JOuA
One of the distinct compensations
of advancing years, from the mascu-
line point of view, is the increasing
emancipation from the dictation of
styles in wearing apparel. With ma
turity and prosperity the man of af-
fairs shakes off the dizzy satorial
straitjackets of adolescence and gets
comfortable This does not mean
that he becomes shabby and slovenly
or that he necessarily saves money
in dressing himself. 1t only means
that when a man of years and re-
sponsibilities visits his tailor he in
structs him to fashion his garments
according to safe and sane architec-
tural designs.
The edict has gone forth from an
organization bearing the name of the
International Custom Cutters, that
there are to be radical changes in
mems fashions this spring and sum-
mer. 1t is said that the foolish"
exaggerated man" is to give place to
the "unexaggerated man. which
means according to the tailors' blue
prints that Shoulders will be narrow,
the chest full and the waist narrow,
giving the effect of a corset" The
trousers will be skin tight, reminding
one of the good old days, and will
only reach to the shoe top. This is
called by the tailors the 'unexagger-
ated man" Heaven help the mascu-
line being who has a hankering for
bit of exaggeration along the same
lines
The custom cutters are bewaillng
the fact that American men do not
pay sufficient attention to the die
tates of fashion. We are indicted as
being grossly independent of form
and fashion. only our college boys
appear to pay any attention to the
mode in clothing, while the men &c
their way happy and comfortable and
not caring a continental whether the
custom cutters like it or not. Debon-
aire young gentlemen who are sup
ported by generous fathers will nc
doubt encase their legs in snake skins
and pad their chests instead of theiI
shoulders. But the great producing
mass of men will keep right on wear
ing loose and becoming clothing ano
the International Custom Cutters car
go hang.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
THE NATURAL DIVISION.

The congressional reapportionment
bill drafted by Senator Oliver is
plainly the plan that should be adopt
ed. 1t provides for placing all the
counties of eastern Oregon in one dist
rict; Multnomah county in another
and the remainder of the Willamette
valley counties in third.
The merit of this plan is that it di-
vides the state along natural geo.
graphical lines. The present con-
gressional arrangement is unsatisfac-
tory because eastern Oregon, though
constituting two-thirds the area of the
state, is helpless through being
grouped with Multnomah and
several other western oregon coun-
ties. With the reapportionment in
effect eastern Oregon will be enabled
to select a congressman of its own
and he will be free to devote his en-
ergies to the needs of this section of
the state.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

The legislature has but few days
in which to conclude its labo:s and
some of the most important measures
are yet to be passed upon. 1t will be
absolutely impossible for the legisla-
tors to give all measures full consid-
GRAFTON. However there is this con-
ISOLATION that two-thirds the bills pro-
posed merit no consideration what
ever.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
WHY DID THEY DO IT?

Through the persistent opposition
ures have been so emasculated that
the legislation enacted amounts to
but little in the view of this paper.
AS it looks now we will have bond
ing law and a law providing for
highway commission and a commits
sioner. But the state aid bills fails
SO there will be no state appropri-
alton for good roads
Just what the highway commission
can accomplish without the state aid
law is difficult to understand. On
the face of things the commission as
provided for looks about as useful as
e silk tassel on an umbrella. Yet it
is possible of course that the COM
mission may do much good. The good
roads leaders seem jubilant over the
creation of the commission even
though the other measures went by
the board. Let us hope the exulta-
ton is not due merely to the fact that
they have won a moral victory. 1t
takes something more than moral
victories to build good roads.
Why the farmers organizations of
this state have striven so hard to
block good roads legislation this year
is hard to understand. Usually the
farmer is the most earnest advocate
OF good roads. He should be such
because he has the most to gain
from good highways.
The East Oregonian is frank to
charge the opposition Of the grange
and of the farmers union to mistaken
zeal on the part of the leaders and
not to genuine opposition on the part
of the eank and file of farmers them
selves. The average farmer is a sem
sible, practical man and he knows
that the only way to do a thing is to
d. it. He knows that good roads can
not be constructed out of talk. He
knows that If permanent highways
are to be had money must be voted
for their construction and that some
one must be intrusted with the Job.
He also realizes the hopelessness of
trying to get a good roads plan that
will be absolutely equitable and salts
factory to everyone. Only the In
dams could do that.
Had the majority OF the farmers
fully understood the measures pro-
posed by the good roads association
and the motives back Of those meas
ures they would have risen in their
might and demanded the passage of
those bills. Many Umatilla county
farmers did favor the bills, prominent
among the number being H. ]. Tay-
lor and S. r. Thompson, officers Of
the good roads association.
But the grange leaders at Salem
have worked with the apparent idea
of blocking any legislation that prom
ised results. They have persistently
fought the state aid bill and they
have tried to SO amend the other
measures as to make them worthless.
To a large extent they have succeeded
In their desires.
What do the farmers think Of the
ways Of their organization leaders?
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

Ever since his nomination as gov
ernor ofNew Jersey, DR.. Woodrow
Wilson has been talking. His friends
point to his record so far to show
that from the start he showed he
had one of the qualities least COM
mon among men who are obliged to
talk often. He never opens his mouth
unless he has something to say.
Here's how he describes the progress
sve spirit: That quality in man
which insists upon recognizing new
facts which tries to adjust legisla-
tive policy to new facts and conditi-
ons as they arise"
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

The timber trust, according to Her
bert Knox Smith, is about the great
est trust ever. 1t has the Standard
oil company looking like mole hill
beside a mountain. This news is not
surprising for at various times there
has been evidence of the existence of
the timber and lumber trust.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

Is it possible that some of the leg
islators who voted to pass the bill re-
pealing the anti-wife beating law over
the governors veto expect trouble up
on their return home?
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
Treatment of U. S. Fishing Vessels

The bureau of manufactures is in
receipt of a memorandum of the Ca
madam department Of customs, da.ed
December 81, 1910, containing IN
structions regarding the treatment of
United States fishing vessels in Ca
madam waters, in accordance with the
decisions of The Hague tribunal of
September 7, 1910. The memoran-
dunn is on file in this bureau, where
it may be consulted by those interest
ed.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

Portland people wanted to give
100000 for the construction of good
roads throughout the state but the
grangers objected. Portland is now
in a position to say Every well, Wen
keep the money then"
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
THE ROUNDUP.
Grrigon Irrigator.l

"Dirt will soon be flying On the
new Roundup stadium. The grounds
will unquestionably be in good shape
for the big show next fall and there
will be rousing entertainment. Now
let big preparations be made for
housing and feeding the visitors who
will be here"
We take the above from the Ore
gonian, of Pendleton, and are glad
to know that the enthusiastic people
of that fine little city are still hustling
to make the Roundup a success,
bigger success than ever.
And there Is no doubt it will be.
Last year they went at the job al
most blind, without money, almost
without concert of action-but what
success they made! Never had
such crowds been seen east Of the
mountains in Oregon.
And fun, enjoyment! Why every
body went away feeling that they
would not miss a repetition Of the
event for a weeks wage. And they
and their relatives will all be there
this year to make up one of the larg-
est crowds ever assembled in the
state, except in Portland. Not even
the State Fair will excel them in
numbers.
We are glad that up to date no
town has had the gall to steal Pen
dleton's great show, either in name
or act. And that is right It belongs
to Pendleton just as much as the
State Fair belongs to Salem or the
Rose Festival to Portland.
And in time it will be an event of
the greatest Importance to the entire
Northwest, and Of untold advantage
to the whole state of Oregon.
AS for housing and feeding the Wis
itors, we know the Pendleton people
will look out for that. Every hearth
and every home in Pendleton will be
opened to the strangers, and there will
be no lack Of bed or board.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

Consul Alc5zo p. Garrett reports
that the exports from the United
States to Mexico through the port Of
Nuevo Laredo for the month of De-
cember were valued at s1.098,259, an
increase of $S5 $40 over the exports
in December 1903
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

There is said to be only the remotest
possibility that Senator Albert B..
Cummins of Iowa, would consent to
enterthe field against Senator La
Toilette.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15

Mayor Gaynor of New York, is be-
ing flooded with invitations to address
public gatherings in various sections
of the country. including the legisla-
lures Of several states. The mayor
regards 1t as joke that several news
papers have laid out for him tours
that lead in different sections. These
stories really brought about the in
vitations. One report was that the
mayor was to take a trip through
Mexico and as result the Texas leg
islature was misled into adopting res
olutions requesting Judge Gaynor to
address both branches ION his way
through to Mexico" The legislature
has made all preparations to accord
the mayor the privileges Of the floor
in both houses. In the meantime
Mayor Gaynor says II he leaves New
York. II will be for rest and not to
accept any invitations of any kind, be-
cause his throat needs a complete
rest.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
ALONG THE RIGHT LINE.

From the big "Get Together con-
-vention to be held here February -,
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-02-15
} . ~~~~> ~ 80 :

Let no man pray that he knows =
not sorrow; =
Let no soul ask to be free =
from pain,
For the gall of today is the Z
sweet of tomorrow,
And the moments loss is the Z
lifetime gain.
, Through want of a thing does its =
, worth redouble; =
, Through hunger's pangs does =
. the feast content, =
, And only the heart that has har- =
D bored trouble
, Can fully rejoice when joy is =
D sent. Z
D Let no man shrink from the Bit
D ter tonics
. OF grief, and yearning, and
D need, and strife;
3 For the rarest chords in the Z
. souls harmonics
. Are found in the minor I
strains of life.
. Ella Wheeler Wilcox.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01

SpIit-Los Drag.

three or four inches wide and one.
quarter of an inch thick may be used
for the blade. This should be at
tached to the front slab, SO that 1t will
be one-half inch below the lower edge
of the slab at the ditch end, while the
end of the iron toward the middle OF
the road should be flush with the edge
of the slab. The bolts holding the
blade in place should have fiat heads
and the holes to receive them should
be countersunk.
II the face of the log stands plumb
1t is well to wedge out the lower edge
of the blade with a three-cornered
strip Of wood to give it set like the
bit of plane.
platform of inch boards held to
gether by three cleats should be
placed on the stakes between the
slabs. These boards should be spaced
at least an inch apart to allow any
earth that may heap up and fall over
the front slab to sift through upon the
road again. The end cleats should be
placed 80 that they will not rest upon
the cross stakes, but drop inside them,
while the middle cleat can be shifted
to either side of the middle stake.
These cleats should extend about an
inch beyond the finished width of the
platform
An ordinary trace chain is strong
enough to draw the implement, provid.
ed the clevis is not fastened through
link. The chain should be wrapped
around the rear stake, then passed
over the front slab. Raising the chain
at this end of the slab allows the
earth to drift past the face OF the
drag. The other end of the chain
should be passed through the hole in
the end of the slab and Is held by
pin passed through link. One and
one-half trace chains are sufficient
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
MRS. SELBY AND PRIZE BABY

IT have always used Cuticura SOAP
and no other for my baby and he has
never had a sore of any kind. He
does not even chafe as most babies
do. feel sure that 1t is all owing to
Cuticura Soap, for he is fine and
healthy, and when FIVE months old,
won a prize in a baby contest. 1t
makes my heart ache to go into 80
many homes and see a sweet-faced
baby with the whole top Of its head
a solid mass of scurf, caused by poor
soap. I always recommend Cuticura,
and nine times out of ten the next
time see the mother she says: oh!
1 am SO glad you told me Of Cuticura.' "
(Signed) Mrs. G.. A. Selby, Redondo
Beach, California. Jan. 10, 1911.
Although Cuticura Soap and ONT
ment are sold everywhere, sample
of each, with 32-page book, will be
mailed free on application to "Cuti-
cura," Dept. 20 L. Boston.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
Longevity Personlfied.

Senator Benjamin F. Tillman re-
lates an amusing anecdote about a
colored man named jeff, who has been
with neighboring South Carolina
family since before the war.
One day" said Mr. Tillman, his
mistress was rather surprised when
old JEFF asked to have few days off
to CO. as he put it, up to de old state
OF Bosting,' to see his aunt
Why, jeff said the lady, your
aunt must be pretty old. isn't She?
Yes'm,' he replied. 'yes'm; NAH
aunt must be pretty ole now-she's
bout ah hundred an five years ole
now.
One hundred and five years. ex-
claimed his mistress, what on earth
is she doing up there in Boston?
Deed, rs demo what's she's
doin', ma'am,' rejoined old JEFF, in all
seriousness, she's up dere Twin wild
her gran mother"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
JUST BEFORE THE TROUBLE
How Could the Listener Know What
His Friend Was Trying
to Say?

If any man ever admired his wife.
that man was Howler. And when the
Fitzboodles asked Mrs. Howler to get
up and sing, There is a Garden in
My Face" the husband glowed with
pride.
No matter that she had face like
hippopotamus and a voice like an
elephant, he sat beaming as she sang,
and could not refrain from bending
over to his neighbor and whispering:
Don't you think my wife's got a fine
voice?"
"What?" said his neighbor. who
was little deaf
Don't you think my wife has got a
fine voice." repeated Howler.
"What?"
Don't you think my wife's got a
fine voice?" roared Howler
Sorry" returned the neighbor,
shaking his head. Cant hear a word
you say. That awful woman over
there is making such a frightful row
singing"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
FATE AND THE FLETCHERS
Intervention That Made II Certain
Hour for Senator's Death Had
Not Struck.

Senator Duncan U. Fletcher of Flor
ida sought his berth one night on {
sleeping car on the way south from
Washington. Pulling back the cur
tains of lower nine, he saw that his
bed was already occupied.
Hi, there!" called the senator
shaking the stranger by the shoulder
The sleeper awoke and protested
angrily.
my names Fletcher" explained
the statesman. "and this is my BERTH
You've got nothing on me-" an
swered the other. my names F'letch,
er, and this is my berth"
MY full name is Duncan u. Fletch.
err" the senator elaborated.
Sos mine," agreed the intruder.
"Ah, l see," said the senator, pc.
litely. There must have been a mis-
take in reserving the same berth for
two men Of the same name. I'll go
into the next sleeping car"
The stranger, by this time, was fully
awake, and proceeded to apologize,
and to offer to give up the berth. This
the Lenator would not do, but went
into the car ahead, and found a place
to sleep.
An hour later the train was wreck
ed. The car in which the stranger
occupied the lower nine fell through
a trestle, and that Fletcher was
killed. The senator's car was not
damaged at all.-Popular Magazine.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
GUARD AGAINST
UNSIGHTLY FOWL
The LOSS of Fea theirs on CockereI's
Neck As generally Due to
Pulling Good Cure
for Scurf.

The loss of feathers on the front of
the male birds neck is generally due
to some feather pulling If the wat
ties are long. he is apt to get some of
the morning mash on them. as well as
on some of the feathers on the neck
A hen noticing anything on the wat
ties of a male bird generally picks it
off, and if there should be anything on
the feathers near the wattles. II would
be natural for her to also pick at
them. and in this way may gradually
get the neck bare. In cases where the
head and back Of the neck are bsre.
and upon which is found a substance
like dust. 1t is due to scurf. For this
trouble nothing is better than to .rst
give a teaspoonful Of castor oil, after
which give. daily. little condition
powder in the food. Anoint the parts
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
HANDY BARREL
Is DIVISIBLE
Made An Two Parts and Can bs
Used Several Tines-Eco.
uom4caI In the Long
Run.

After the head has been knocked
out of an old-style barrel its useful
ness, except as a receptacle for ashes.
is about over A Nebraska man, how
ever. has invented a cask that is
made in two parts and can be used
over and over again for any goods
which can be transported In a carrier
of this conception. Obviously some
things, like -four. could not. The bar.
rel is cut transversely through the
middle and the outer edges Of the
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
lnauIted.

A strapping German with big beads
OF perspiration streaming down his
race was darling in and out of the
alsies OF a Philadelphia department
store.
His excited actions attracted the at
tention of all salespersons, and they
hardly knew what to make of it. A
hustiing young man of the clothing
department walked up to him and
asked, Are you looking for something
In mems clothing?
mol" he roared; mot mems cloth.
ing; Vimen's clothing. can't find my
wife!"-Lippincott's.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
New Divisible Barrel.

two parts have rings. which fit closely
together and prevent the egress Of
any substance. Threaded bolts, run.
ming through small rings and fastened
therein with nuts help keep the parts
together. OF course. cask of this
type costs much more than the old.
style barrel. but It is claimed that IL
is even less expensive in the long run
owing to the number of times 1t can
be used.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
Loeusts Cause DAMAGE.

In southern and central Mexico
large swarms of locusts have caused
serious damage lately. Young banana
and rubber trees have been complete.
~ stripped of leaves and bark On
former visits these pests have de.
wasted only corn and other field
crops
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
Explanations,

Miss Fullosoul (of poetical turn
Which are you of opinion one should
say, professor Summer flies or
Summer lfees?'' =.
Absent-Minded Professor (great on
entomology)-The two species, my
dear young lady. are entirely distinct.
Now, the common house fly Then
he wondered why she suddenly open
ed conversation with the young
man on her right.-London Sphere.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01

loss of feathers on the backs of hens
is usually caused by sharp claws of
the male bird File the nails a little
blunt. and remove the afflicted hens
to separate quarters. feeding a little
sulphur in the soft food and anoint
the skin with vaseline or petroleum
Jelly.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01
Imports From erenoble.

Shelled walnuts worth $64.614. pho
Geographic paper worth $67,423 and kid
and lamb skins worth s64,982, were
the largest items in the shipments
from Grenoble. France. to the Unitat
States during the second quarter OF
1911.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-12-01

This is one of the Highest COM
plimentsl ever paid to the level-head-
ed, common sense of Americans
who cut off about two hundred mil
lion pounds of coffee when they
found by actual experiment lin the
majority of cases) that the subtle
drug caffeine, in coffee, worked dis
comfort and varying forms of dis
ease.
Some people haven't the charac-
ter to stop habit when they know
it is killing them, but 1t is easy
to shift from coffee to Postum, for,
when made according to directions.
1t comes to table cup of beverage,
seal brown color, which turns to
rich golden brown when cream Is
added, and the taste is very like
the milder grades of Old Govt Java
Postum is a veritable food-drink
and highly nourishing, containing
all the parts of wheat carefully pre-
pared to which is added about ten
per cent of New Orleans molasses,
and that is absolutely all that
Postum is made of
Thousands of visitors to the pure
food factories see the ingredients
and how prepared. Every nook
and corner is open for every visit
or to carefully inspect. Crowds
come daily and seem to enjoy 1t.