davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
CindereIIa's Slippers.

In transcribing the parchments of
the old French chroniclers many mis-
takes were made, due in great part,
to the condition of the originals. which
were sometimes almost undecipher
able. Of these errors one made by
Perrault has been spread broadcast
When. in the seventeenth century, he
was writing his fairy tales to amuse
the courtiers of France he had re
course to the old French chronicles
There he read that Cinderella, or
whatever her name was in those days
went to the ball in slippers of war;"
the royal fur of that time-miniver.
as it is now known. Perraut, mis-
reading the text. decked out his hero
Inc in slippers Of verre glass, Il very
different thing. The real Cinderella
probably went to the dance in those
pointed. curving. fur bordered shoes
of medieval days. But. thanks TO
Perrault. she will trip down the cor
ridors of time in her little Gathering
glass slippers.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
RED TAPE IN GERMANY.
A Railway Ticket. a Controversy and
Delayed Train.

Delayed Train.
In an account of the duchy Of Teck
and its Inhabitants by the Rev. s. Bar
ing-Gould an amusing experience is
thus described by the author:
I'VE are wont. we Englishmen. to
crumbe at red tapism. but with US 1t
= ,eS not go beyond the government
u..ires. In Germany it is everywhere.
| had an instance of it between ODER
Lenningen and Owen. had asked at
the former place for third class
ticket to Owen and had stepped into
third class carriage. On these branch
lines nearly every one travels fourth
I counted twelve compartments fourth.
nine third and three second. There
was no first class compartment. Be.
fore reaching the next station-in fact,
a mile from Ober Lenningen-the in
spector came round.
"'Hah. you have fourth class
ticket and are in a third class COM
partment: The fine is marks
Il explained and offered at once to
pass into an inferior carriage or pay
the difference.
"'That will not do. You have in
fringed the law and must pay 6 marks.
II get out at Owen and will explain
matters to the station master.
Il did so.
"'The fine is 6 marks said this lat
ter peremptorily.
But said I. I demanded a third
class ticket and was given one for
which l had not asked. This was an
oversight Of the clerk
"'You should have examined your
ticket
1.-The train was delayed five minutes
while the matter was thrashed out or
the platform. the travellers craning
their necks out of the windows of
their respective carriages. looking OH
and listening with lively interest. AT
last reluctantly tx. station master
yielded. l must pay the difference.
"'What is it|
"'One penny"
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Those Women!

The chief was cross that morning:
and was venting his wrath on the
pretty young lady who manipulated
the typewriter
Everything is in confusion on my
desk" he said testify. 1T always H."
you insist that you don't want amy
thing disturbed there" she responded
meekly.
"Well, I don't wish my papers dis
turbed, but l don't want this sheet Of.
postage stamps left there"
"Where shall l put them?" she IN
quired demurely as she took them up.
Don't ask too many questions" he
snapped. Put them anywhere out Of
my sight
every well, SIR" she cooed as softly
as a dove.
And, licking them with her pretty red
tongue. she stuck the sheet on his bal6
head and walked out to seek new
ituation.-HoustOn Chronicle.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
French Academicians as Family Men.

A French statistician has been look
ing at the records Of members Of the
Academic Franchise as family men.
OF the forty 'immortals" it appears
that the great majority are married,
but no fewer than fourteen are child
less. Among those who have the lar
gest families are NJ. Henri Poincare.
the scientist, who is the father of
three daughters and son. and NJ.
Jean Richepin. the poet and dramatist.
who has been twice married and has
four sons. VI. Rene Bazin has also
several children, but the families Of
the other acad"micians who have fam
lilies ut all do not number more than
one or two. NJ. Anatole France Is
among the half dozen members who
are MISUNDERSTANDING Gazette.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
NO CHICKEN IN THE PIE.
The Waiter Easily Explained Why It
Was Not There.

A hungry customer seated himself
at table In Il quick lunch restaurant
and ordered Il chicken pie When il
arrived he raised the lid and sat gaz-
iLg at the contents intently for awhile
Finally he called waiter.
Look here. Sam" he said, what
did | order?"
Chicken + lie. sah."
"And what have you brought mel"
Chicken pie, sab"
Chicken pie, you black rascal!"
the customer replied. Chicken pieI
Why, there's not piece Of chicken in
1t and never was"
Oats right, boss-dey amt no chick
en- in It,"
Then why do you call it chicken
pie? 1 never heard Of such thing"
Oats all right, boss. Dey don'S
have to be no chicken in chicken pie
Dey amt no dog in dog biscuit. is
iey T-Everybody's Magazine.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
A DREAM.
I glanced at a daily paper

! glanced at daily paper
That nevsboy thrust in my hand.
And | read Of a baseball contest.
Twas Wit By no prentice hand
But the thing that most impressed ne
And made ne cry Il declare.
Was the fact that in all that story
No word of slang was there.
1t was briefly and simply written
And flowed like a lImpid stream.
Nobody "bfled the horsehide"-
l thought it was surely dream.
No player pooled a homer
And none was walked to first"
And I read that slangless story
in deepest bliss immersed.
No pitcher was "pelted with bingles."
No batter was whitfield three times"
In all that detailed story
There were no linguistic crimes,
And when I reached home at even
I sought 1t once more-and then
I discovered I'd lost that paper.
I'll ne'er see its like again.
Denver Republican
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
An Improvement.

Patience-Of invaluable service to-
students of singing is said to be ma
chine invented by a Paris physician
which records the vibrations OF the
voice on a Photographic film.
Patrice-I should think it would i'm
prove some voices.
Patience-Why?
Patrice-Because they wouldn't really
look as bad as they sound.-YonkerE
Statesman.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Good.

Tommy, what is the mean
ing of the word futility?
TOMMY don't know exactly, but
an example of it would be trying to
tickle turtles back with a chicken
feather.-Youngstow Telegram.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
An Enicure's Pilot.

"Why do you follow that summer
girl aboutY' asked one early bird.
Because Of her valuable assistance"
replied the other. "She helps me to-
listen for food as well as look for it.
Every time she sees caterpillar she
screams" -WashingtOn Star.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Time and Money.

"It's too bad they are not on speak,
ing terms"
Il don't know; he tells me he has
saved $1.50 and has read two novels
since he ceased going there boston
Herald.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
The Reason.

1.-THE young widow seems sincerely
grieved over her old husbands death.
$50 would you be if you had to go
in mourning just when you had I'M
ported a brand new wardrobe Of the
latest styles. baltimore American.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Cheerful Doctor.

Doctor-Well, how are you today.
Hans?
Patient-Thanks, doctor, feel much
better.
Doctor-That's good. You're looking
much better too.-Fliegende Batter.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Studying Shakespeare.

You should join our Shakespeare
club"
What do you do?"
"Well, we fine every member for
nonattendance Then we take the
money and go to musical comedy
Washington Herald.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Sure Way.

Willis--I wonder if there win ever
be universal peace.
Gillis-Sure. All they've got to do
Is to get the nations to agree that in
case of war the winner pays the PEN
sionS.-Puck
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Notes.

THAT man seems to exercise great
deal Of influence"
YES" replied Senator Sorghum.
"Yet he never sounded the keynote
of any campaign"
mo. He never sounded any key
notes. But he has signed some ex-
ceedingly important promissory notes"
Washington Star.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Her WORTH.

Bullins-Id be willing to fight duel
for Miss Dusnberry.
Hitlers-Well. if you should fight a
duel for her l hope you'll know enough
to let your rival do all the killing
Chicago News.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
A Lover Of Horseflesh,

II take lots Of pleasure out Of horses.
l enjoy them more and more"
Thought you preferred an auto"
II do. But it's such bully sport see
ing horses shy, rear, run away and
all that sort of thing!''-Puck.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Matrimonial Amenities.

Mrs. Nagleigh-I suppose you are
satisfied now that you made mistake
when you married me?
Nagleigh-I made mistake, all
right, but I'm not satisfied.-Boston
Transcript.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
,s...SS
The Result.

Il had an acquaintance who went.
about getting q job with logged de-
termination"
"Well?"
"He got one as a barker"-Baltl-
more American.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Ha Didn't.


$50 you don't want no huckleber-
RESP
mo. I have changed my mind. L
see your cat is asleep in those buckle
berries"
''That's all right, mum. don't
mind waking the cat up."-Louisville
Courier-J Ournal
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Just So.

"Why do they call bellboy in a
hotel 'Buttons?"
Because he's always OF when you
need him most, guess" - Boston
Globe.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Weiohed In the Balance.

Belshazzar saw the writing on the
wall.
ut means your wife will be home on
the 800 and you had better begin to
wash up all the Dishes" advised the
interpreter.
Herewith a distinct gloom was cast
over the banquet.-Chicago Tribune
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
His Ambition.

Tommy-What are you going to dc
when you grow up?
Johnny I'm going to have bed
clothes long enough to pull over my
head without scrooching.-New York
Sun.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Reversed,

Nov, Lottie." said the teacher to
pupil in the juvenile class, "can you
tell me what vice versa means?"
Eyes, ma'am," answered the little
miss. ut means sleeping with your
feet toward the head of the bed
Philadelphia Inquirer.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
More Ornamental.

Patience-Two heads are better than
one, you know. dear.
Patrice-Well, III admit they give
opportunity to use more hatpins.-Yon-
kers Statesman.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Pernicious Literature.

Ibid you see that stout woman push
that little man off the sidewalk"
YES"
"What did she do it for?'
"Why, she's been reading somewhere
that women are displacing men in all
the walks of e"-Cleveland Plain
Dealer
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14

You're married man. aren't your"
II am"
81 thought so. When you married
men get night out you never know
when to go home."-Detroit Free Press
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14

CITY MESSENGER COMPANY.
TELEPHONE NUMBER CHANGED,
The City Messenger company has in
stalled two telephones, Nos. 1891 and
5941, one of which is always open
Call either number and Central will
get u.s." K. l.. ZEEK. manager.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Wanderlust.

Wanderlust.
Mother travels for her health
Doctors told her. sure
Spends pretty pile Of wealth
Taking every cure.
Sister travels for beau.
Though she won't admit
Mountains. seashore, to and fro.
Always on the fit.
Brother travels for his boom
Up and down the land:
Thinks he sees an Office loom
That will just be grand.
Father travels for the Arm
North. south, east and west.
He's the unconsidered worm
Paying for the rest.
New York e,n
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
PUBLISHERS NOTICE.

City subscribers failing to receive
the Herald by p. m. on Mondays
and Thursdays will please notify the
City Messenger Co.. Tel. 1891, and
paper will be sent to the address at
once.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1911-09-14
Presence Needs No Presents.

She-Before we were married, Jack,
you were always giving me presents
Now you never give me anything.
He-My dear girl. did you ever hear
Of a fisherman giving bait to fish he
had caught Flown and Country.
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
BENEFIT PLANNED
FOR WORKING BOYS
Delightful Programme to Be
Given at Playhouse.

Everything points to a successful and
delightful evening at the Playhouse to-
morrow night, when the Junior Auxiliary
Of the Working Boys Home will present
an attractive programme. the proceeds of
which are to 60 to that institution.
Boxes for the performance have al
ready been taken by Col. Thompson. Mr..
and Mrs. William Nelson Emo, and Mr.. and
Mrs. Granville Fortescue. the latter Of
whom Is president of the Junior Auxil-
iary. Miss Sophy Johnston is secretary,
and Mrs. Walter Tuckerman is treasurer
Granville Fortescue has arranged the
programme which consists OF an adapta-
tion Of Francis Perry Elliot's short story.
THE Smart Set::'' humorous songs by
George OConnor; the Danube Dance, by
Miss Saxton, and la comedietta, Break
ing Into Society,"" by Granville Fortescue,
the scene Of which is laid in Washington
and the time Mi Careme.
Prominent among those who Will aid
the work are Miss Sophy Johnston. Miss
Evelyn Chew. Mrs. Downing. Miss Lin
coin, and Mrs. Gardner Bell, while the
patronesses include Nine London, Mrs.
MacVeagh. Mrs Wickersham. Mrs. Rob-
ert Shaw Oliver. Mrs. Beekman Winthrop.
Mrs. Clark, Mrs Emo, Mrs. Foster. Mrs.
Julian James Mrs. John R Mclean, Mrs.
Samuel Spencer, Mrs. Gardiner Williams,
Mrs. Charles Brighton Wood, Mrs.
Biddle. Mrs. Murray Cobb. Mrs. Ralph
Jenkins Mrs. Edward Mclean, Mrs.
Arthur Lee, Mrs. George McLanahan,
and Mrs. Upshur Morehead.
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
PHYSICIAN PRAISES
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE
System Can Be Proven True,
Declares F. J. FlunO.

Before a large audience at the Colunl.
bia Theater yesterday afternoon, DR.. F.
J. Fluno, of Oakland. Cal, formerly a
medical practitioner. spoke in behalf of
Christian Science.
Christian Science is not made up of
mere personal opinions" declared the
speaker. 1T is the science of being.
Like the science of numbers 1t never asks
what we think about 1t or how we feel
about it, or whether We like it or not.
THE Christian Science textbook
teaches pure science: 1t does not teach
a mere belief. When Mrs. Eddy discov-
cred Christian Science, she gave up her
former opinions and ideas concerning
God and man and wrote nothing but the
unfoldings of science. from the basis Of
the one divine principle-God.
Christian Science teaches that all Is
good; not, however. that sin and evil are
good, but that all that Is is good. and
that what is not good it not at all.
Whenever Christian Scientists demon
strate over sickness or sin, either in
or others. they are overcom-
ing death in a measure, and with the dis
appearance of sickness and sin, death
will disappear and be as though 1t had
not been, as. indeed. it never was"
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
CHEVY CHASE CAR
AND BUGGY COLLIDE
Mr.. Cummings and Miss Cont
ner Injured in Accident.

Andrew ]. Cummings and Miss Zelpha
Contner. while out driving Saturday even
ing. met with a painful accident. when
they were struck by a Chevy Chase car
near the District line. The car ran into
the buggy In which they were driving.
almost demolishing it. Miss Contner was
thrown in front of the car and rendered
unconscious. A passing automobile was
pressed into service and carried the young
lady to the Office of DR.. T. X. Conrad,
where IL was found she had received
severe scalp wound about three inches
long After being treated, she was able
to be taken to her home. The injuries
to Mr. Cummings, who is a member of
the Maryland legislature. were not Sc
rious.
A number of eyewitnesses said the
car did not stop at the District line. as
is the usual custom. although there were
at least a half dozen persons waiting to
take the car to the city. The motorman
admitted he had lost control of his car.
and when he reached the District line
he was unable to bring his car to a
stop until after he had gone a square
beyond.
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
SYLVAN JOYS.

Last when file left the broing town,
its weary stretch of pavements and its buildings gray and brown
and wandered the leay woods aar from strife and
from all the carkng things which drive despair Oh
may like the of wheels the noise of busy mart but in
the woods find the peace that soohes troubled heart The
splendid majesty of makes human vain the music
of the swang boghs beats organs strain and wind
that fans your brow and sgs of sweeer than the
franknsense of Araby the best wandered in the wondrou
woods where hymns sung and lost the burden of
years. for all the world seemed young and all the little ges and
hates thought and ugly word and phase of city life
You wash your soul of ugly stains and
dirt kindred goods when you're couning with the
deep the virgin woods Yet there will ntrude and
change your smiles groans jay policeman in, and
taxed me twenty bones. WALT MASON.
By Gerss M.th Adama)
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
PASTOR URGES EXHIBITION
WORLDS ILLS AND EVILS
Rev. led H. Copp, Districts Rescue Worker, Would
Show in Vivid Form Social and Physical Degre-
dation as Object Lesson to Humanity.

as the only means Of saving the human
race.
Not content with portraying the evils
of war, he would undertake to bring be-
FIRE the public the various stages Of
alcoholism, showing the misery and the
degradation that results in prostitution.
divorce. and parental neglect, that will
bring the lesson home with q vividness
that no brush could paint
Expose of the Wicked.
Not even the Industrial standards OF
the countries should be omitted. he said,
but as with the other existing evils.
he claimed that child labor. employers
neglect of the health and lives Of their
employees, should be presented by such
exhibits that would picture truly the evils
that exist and expose the wicked from
the good
The human race" he said. surely
has come to recognize the Fatherhood
of God. the brotherhood of man, and the
familyhood of earth. Worlds fairs have
contributed their share to the rapid
scientific advancement, but hid away In
the life of each nation, like Q cancer, are
the ills and the evils of which I have
spoken, and which will remain and
thrive as long as they are weakly COW
cred up instead Of being bravely up
rooted. Exhibition would mean exposure.
and that would mean extinction"
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15

Mothers" praises were sung yesterday
from every pulpit in the land. and her
sweet name was lovingly mentioned in
country and its possessions.
The far-reaching influence which
mother exerts. through her great love for
her children and for everything that
stands for good. true and noble, on the
future of this nation or humanity at
large. was pictured In words of eloquent
praise.
Mother reigned supreme yesterday. Al
though queen of the universe every day.
yesterday was her special holiday.
Mothers Day." and her flower, the
white and red carnation. was proudly
worn by thousands Of men, women, and
children. The emblem was not only worn
in church and Sunday school. but the
personnel Of the various railroad lines
remembered mother by wearing the
flower.
Day SiRnaIzed Here.
The request of the founder Of Mothers
Day, Miss Anna Jarvis, that each person
signalize the day by doing some special act
of kindness or performing some mission
Of mercy in honor Of his or her mother
did not go amiss. judging from the en-
thusiastic and large congregations and
audiences which were present yesterday
at the various Mothers Day exercises in
this city.
The Young Womans Christian Associa-
ton Joined with the Young Mems Chris
tan Association in a union service in
rec nP he
was profusely decorated with the red and
white carnation, and the large audience
wore the sweet emblem. The principal
address was delivered by Supt. J. S. Hal
limond, of the Bowery Mission, New
York. and spoke of Mothers boys-God's 8
men" Mrs. Kate Waller Barret. of the
Florence Crittenton Mission, also spoke
General Secretary Cooper. of the Y. NJ.
c. A, presided, and Miss Florence Brown,
Of the Y. w. c. A. assisted. Selections
were rendered by the Ladies' Quartet, Of
Rubinstein Chorus.
Services In Churches.
The Waugh Methodist Episcopal
Church. First Baptist Church. First
Presbyterian Church. Temple Baptist
Church, Bethany Baptist Church, Met
ropolitan Baptist Church, Fifth Baptist
Church. West Washington Baptist
Church, st. PauPs Lutheran Church, and
the Peoples Church, at Pythian Temple,
held appropriate services.
The Pennsylvania. the Baltimore and
Ohio, and the Southern Railway lines
placed large bouquets of carnations in
each of its dining cars. and flower was
given to each diner. with the message of
Mothers Day
The celebration of Mothers Day was
inaugurated in Philadelphia in 1908 by
Miss Anna Jarvis, and has met every
where with such an enthusiastic reception
that 1t is not only observed in this coun-
try, but in Canada and Mexico and on
every continent of the world.
Coming as 1t does only few days be-
fore the general observance Of Memorial
Day. there is containeo IN the holiday
a suggestion of the great work performed
during the civil war by mothers, who
ministered to the sick and dying or suf-
fered still greater at home in the agonies
Of suspense
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
WILL BUILD RAILWAYS.

Am orleans Get Important COnces-
sions in Asiatic Turkey.
The Department Of State has received
a cablegram from Minister Carter, in
charge Of the American Embassy at
stating that the applica-
ton of the Ottoman-American Develop
ment Company for a concession for the
Of an extensive railway sys-
tenn in Asiatic Turkey has been approved
by the grand vizier and the council Of
ministers Of the Ottoman government,
and has been referred to Parliament for
action by that body.
The Ottoman-American Development
Company is an American corporation
with offices in New York City. and its
efforts to secure this concession has
received the support of the State Depart
ment.
The Washington herald., 1911-05-15
WILLIAMS FUNERAL TO-DAY.
Pioneer WashinEtOnian to BE Buried
in Rock Creek Cemetery.

Pioneer WashinEtOnian to BE Buried
in Rock Creek Cemetery.
Rev. John Reid shannon, pastor of
Metropolitan NJ. E. Church. will offciate
at funeral services this afternoon for
Joseph Williams. one time president of the
common council of Washington. who died
at his residence. I'll B street southwest.
Saturday morning.
Interment will be in Rock Creek Gene
terry. Pallbearers will be selected from
among the Association Of Oldest Inhabi
tants, the B. P. o. Elks, and Patriotic
Sons Of America
Mr.. Williams, who was eighty years of
age, was born in Fredericksburg. Va,
and came to Washington after the civil
war He was connected with the firm of
Litchfield. Hunt & Williams. and while a
member of this company superintended
the laying Of the old block pavement In
Pennsylvania avenue. The Tiber Creek
sewer was also built under his super
vision.
He is survived by a daughter. Mrs. L.
NJ Burtt, and a granddaughter. Mrs.
Nethe Sims. Mrs. William died twenty
years ago.