Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1911-08-18
SOME RECENT POLITICAL
DISCOVERIES:

i'eoihiiB anu ACTIVITY. % RAPID ana
marvellous have these discoveries been
that the world is not surprised at any
announcement from any quarter. 1t
is no surprise, therefore, that the
realm of politics should be invaded
and thrilled by the magic of discov-
cry. In national politics great discov-
cries have been made, but in these
few feeble remarks" we do not pre-
sumo to take wide range, like North
Carolina bully, and cover too much
territory, and SO, will point out few
,9of the many modern discoveries made
in things political in this great and
Attod old State of Virginia, once the
home and mother of Presidents and
statesmen-later the hotbed of poiti-
cal geniuses and discoveries. to saw
nothing of inventors.
The campaign of 1911, now on,
will 60 down as the Edison campaipn
in the history of Virginia Democracy.
The future historian will make the
pages glow with thrilling biographi-
cal sketches the Wizards of these
days have developed and the wonder
full achievements they have made. But
to begin:
Delving among the archives some
where, the discovery has been mnde
that Senator Thomas Standpat Martin
has been bad man since on or before
about 20 years ago. This discovery
was made by the Honorable William
Antlc Jones, member of Congress. and
a life long acquaintance of the said
Thomas Standby Martin and more or
Jess Intimately, at arms length, asso-
ciated with him. His badness. il has
been discovered now, consisted in his
being attorney for railroad, aking
some part in helping along the collec-
tion of little campaign money. etc.
These facts and others similar. have
been known to the said Mr.. Jones for
all these years, but their vileness was
only discovered when brother Jones
looked at them through certain lenses
through which he discovered afar off
and through glass darkly," an
easy seat In the United States Senate
occupied by Mr.. Martin. The reason
these vile things were not discovered
and brought to light long ago was due
OF course, to moral, or immoral dull
ness Of perception on the part of
those who have gone before us. 1t is
also significant that this same astron-
omer of the school political, Mr.. Jones.
has discovered that MIR. Ellyson, per
haps along with the said Mr.. Martin.
handled an unholy fund with unholv
hands, failing, however, to discover.
as his instruments swept the horizon,
that this same "yaller - dog fund
was partially distributed in his. Jones.
own district. Wonderful discoveries
The facts were known away back
yonder when Hector, this "yallern
dog, was pup. but the Indebtedness
and blackness of it all has only re.
Gently dawned upon an astonisbed
universe. But, this article must am
Die and limp along little further.
and record, that the Honorable Carter
Glass has also developed wonderful
powers as discoverer of the good.
bad and Indifferent in the career of
the Honorable Claudius Aurelius
Swanson, now Senator of the United
States aforetime Congressman of
the United States, and before a fore.
time Governor of Virginia In his pri-
vate laboratory this genius in the |
world political discovers microscopi- |
cally, that the said Swanson, one time |
Governor of Virginia, some years ago.
spent too much money, signed bill
permitting the N. and w. to build a /
little cut off through some red CLAW |
guliies around Lynchburg, and over
some sasafras bush and broom sedge
fields, which was not according to the
law. These, and other facts were
known to the Honorable Carter Glass.
the Honorable William, and the other
Honorables and dishonorabes now
trying to out Edison Edison, but up
to this good year of the Blessed Lord.
1911. the moral turpitude and devil
'shness of these facts were unknown
to benighted world.
Annfaar hrfnkk I,.x