El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-12-02

nee upon a time there was
Serious Young Creature who
- believed that her sex had a sa--
cred Mission to Police the World, and
that q Man got Married to get someone
to Reform him
She was one of those Admirable e7lris
with Three-Story Foreheads' Wiio
The Goods as Domestic Angels, ana
-, ,r-ear TTigb Neck Gowns TO Fartles,
e1S are down on all Scrapping Matches
except Church Quarrels. 7,.,,,.s,-,-
IN spite however OF belng AopilSe.
,--ifh VIRTUES. the Maid was G3o1
7 ooI-er an right all right. and as neI
7aroenfed Father had left her Elle o.
Cs5If Fdre Securities the size Of a Trunk.
> Courageous Youth WOoed and Won
her as his Bride e--....7s rho
feared for his Safety IN the Feiia-
Servitude for Life DomestlclIy ina , -
Lady was apt to serve out ana - l-iS'
went to him and thus aQdresseu l-ll-- =,
without doubt" they said, your H.
ancee is a Lulu and a Honey, ana you
are fortunate to have won so Noo1S d
Fitted for the Higher life, and ruined
I'D 70 the High G Pitch In Whlcn sHe
v-abbles2 We apprehend that your Ike
cent Reformation was merely CaAl-
paign Promise tnat ooeSLl ~ 5..ai 49,
election. and that your Good resolves
are no Thicker than the GlIolng on tle
Cold Brick that you are handing the
Tsdv. Therefore we fear that In time
an Existence devoted solely 70 tne
Pursuit Of the Pure, the Beautl1ut ana
the Good will get on your Nerves
sure Of Himself.
at is true. replied the AOu5n, s1OWLg
Elevating the Lid Of his Left Orb, that
do not Sport any Fringe as 2 Snlllns
Example to Youth, nor am 4 a IOp-
Notcher in the Wisdom Push, neTerthe-
less I think that I stand to Win Out IN
Il opine that the Less a Wife knows
the Easier Mark she is and that Work-
ing Household Angel is like Paying
with Marked Cards. I-shall not Up =
nose nv wife in her Sacred Mission Of
Making Over the Universe. On the con
frarv. I shall encourage her to continue
to Devote Herself to the Altruistlc DC
cuDation of Reforming Public Abuses
iiF7or it does not get past me that
when she is Memorializlng congress 70
Abolish Saloons or suppress Foly gaIny
among the Sulus she viii not nave
Leisure in which 20 observe thaI Oc-
casfonallv Vary the MOnOtony OF the
Fireside by opening Bottles or wealthy
Water for ChOrns Girls
Now. as soon as the Nupual Knot
was tied the Wife proceeded TO Try
out her Theories on how to Bring a
Husband Up BY Hand.
Il hold 70 she said that it is q Wife's
DUTY to Lift her Husband up to her
own Exalted Level. and to help him TO
Overcome his Weaknesses, so I shall
put the Double Cross on all Of his For
nssr Amusements. apprehend that IL
is Sinful to Burn Up Good Money in
Cigars when there are so many Great
Causes needing FUNDS Moreover 1t is
the Possession Of Money in his Pockets
that gets a Masculine Creature into
Trouble and there is no other such
Protection against Temptation as not
TO have the Price"
No Money; No Key.
Whereupon the Wife went through
- nix nd
Relieved him OF everything but Car
fare. She also refused to let him carry
a Latch Key lest il might lead him into
staying out Late at Night and when
any Of his Old Friends called in the
Evening the only Refreshments she
served was Cold Shoulder Also when
they met q Real Glrlle-Glrler all DoIIed
Up 10 XIII, she made her Husband Turn
HIS Head the Other Way and Walk
Backward
Notwithstanding all Of these Home