davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
DINNER GUESTS.
Bad Enough to BE Late, but to Be Too
Early Is UnforgivabIe.


1t is an accepted aphOrism that one
should never be late at a duel or q
dinner. Hardness is objectionable.
but the converse is also true. If il i
an Offense to be late it is unfOrgivable
to be too early. This refers solely 10
the dinner, since duelS are affairs of
the past.
Overhaste may be Gathering. but it is
also incOnsiderate. If the dinner is
important enough TO be called ''func-
ton and the house in which il is Civ
en- is sufficiently large to be rated as
mansion the early guest may find
hostess still in her maids hands. If
instead a cottage and a simpler repaSt
await one the housewife may herself
be putting the last necessary touches
10 the salad. In either case the hostess
feels a warm personal approval and
an ability for self praise if the coming
guest is a little tardy. Should the soup
be cold or the roast dry it is not her
fault; she was on time.
Can anything be more harassing than
the "yOu-dOn' t-mind-me-dear" type o.
woman who always comes half an
hour early and always wants to
'help?" Can anybody worship ones
household gods, turn away the hicks,
display the cleaning side in the pro
flaming presence Of a comparative
stranger? \ despairing hostess said
recently:
when l have just men coming
spend my soul on the cooking; when
it's women | put my extra efforts into
furnishing the house; when it's both
l almost kill myself. and when they
come too early want TO lie down and
die"
The quality of mercy is not strain
ed" 1t applies even to giving ones
prospective hostess ample leeway for
preparation. Failing this. invitations
may soon be written. AT Z. and please
be late.'-YOuth's Companion.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
HuM0R OF The DAY
Christmas Shoprinq.

Oh. the day | went a-shopping
Went to do my Christmas shopping
Went to buy a muft for mother,
Went TO buy a pipe for father,
Went to buy doll for grandma
And gold spectacles for baby
No-oh, mott was the other
Way about But mercy gracious,
Such n wild, bewildering chaos
Was the crowded shopping district!
Twas enough to drive me frantic!
Ever thicker. thicker thicker
Surged the crowd at all the counters.
Ever deeper. deeper deeper,
Plunged my hand into my pocket.
Recklessly | spent my savings;
Paid too much for katle's present;
Bought clock for Leonora
When | know that she has seven;
Bought a chatting dish for Robert.
Though he simply hates Welsh rabbit.
But no one can reason clearly
In a iostling crowd of people
Hustling, bustling. frantic people
Matching samples. snatching bargains.
Asking questions. scolding salesgirls.
Once | asked a naughty walker
To direct me to the notions,
But the crowd around that counter
Squeezed and damned like surging waters.
Homeward then | sadly hied me.
Saying. Il will go tomorrow
Bright and early in the morning.
And before the crowd assemblies
| will do my Christmas shopping"
But you know how many duties
Face a housewife in the morning
Johnny's luncheon, Susys mittens,
Baby's bottle. Bridget's orders,
All at once to be looked after;
Husband going, tradesmen coming.
And the telephone bell ringing
Till the morning. swiftly slipping.
Is half gone before I'm ready
Once again to start out shopping.
Once again to breast the surging
OF the tides of Christmas shoppers,
Once again to struggle vainly
With the overworked aoorwalker,
With the weary. hurried salesgirls.
With impatient fellow shoppers.
Then / vow a deep and mighty
Vow within my painting bosom
That next Christmas ] will surely
Buy my presents in September
Or November at the latest.
Quite forgetting it's the nineteenth
| Time I've made this resolution.
I Quite ignoring certain knowledge
That each woman in the country
| Makes this resolution yearly
And she never, never keeps it!
Carolyn Wells in Harpers Weekly.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
A Fish Out of Water.

Many people think that fish when
taken out of the water die because air
has fatal effect on them The real
reason, however, is that their delicate
gill filaments or membranes become
dry and stick together, so that no air
can pass between them. Thus they
lose the power to imbibe necessary
oxygen, and the circulation of their
blood stops. The painful gasping of Il
fish out of water is natures effort to
free the passage through the fila
mentS.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Word From Brother DickeY.

81 mighty glad | Twin wen de holi-
day time come roun'." said Brother
Dickey. "kaZe de hearts er de people
is mo- wide open in dat season. AL
ready l done got de long. black preach
in coat l axed fer, likewise de ole
beaver hat, but l puts my fr'en's on
notice dat amt gwine ter do any
preachin' 'twel after de holidays. Dis
here is de time fer takin' up de col
lection. ATLANTA Constitution.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04

The House committee on expo
sitions has acted favoradly on
the bill to appropriate $3.50, 900
for the construction of a memoir
al to Commodore Perry at Put
Inlay and the holding of CEN
tennial celebration.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Amono the Darwinians.

Yes. said the clubhouse bore, II
suppose | owe some of my success to
the fact that we've been golfers in our
family for generations. | was recently
looking up my ancestral tree
Did they throw any nuts?' asked
the quiet man in the corner.-World of
Golf
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Their Freshness.

These eggs don't seem to be real
fresh" objected the man from Phil
adelphia.
well. it's your fault, then" snapped
the Cincinnati waitress; they were
fresh when | brought them on. but
you've been half an hour opening EN-
Chicago News.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Struck by Lichtnino

\ lady riding in a train found her
self seated by the side of an old ma
tron who was exceedingly deaf.
"Ma'am." said she in a high tone.
did you ever try electricity
what did yOu say. miss?'
81 asked if you ever tried electricity
for your deafness?'
'Oh. yes. indeed. did; it's only last
summer | got struck by lightning. but
/ don't see as it done me a bit of
good"
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
An Ideal of Fiction.

Il want my son to be a polished man
of the world. prepossessing in appear
ance. tactful and skilled in the accom-
plishments of a gentleman"
I'm afraid you have been reading
novels. Your description tallies exact
ly with the description of the hero of
the latest thief story. Washington
Star
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
"The Honorable and Respected"

A curious old Bavarian custom is
just about to be altered in Bavaria by
the minister of justice. Criminals ex-
ecuted in the prison of Straubing have
hitherto been buried with memorial
crosses placed over them stating.
Here lies the honorable and respected
SO-and-so," if the criminal were mar
ried man. while the graves of the con-
demned and executed bachelors bore
the words, Here lies the virtuOus So
and-so." 1t has now been decided in
future to inter them without any
such complimentary remarks.-London
Standard.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Rioht on the Job.

A pupil had been naughty all day,
and the teacher sent him a note or
dering him to stay after school. The
boy wrote an answer on his slate say
ing: "Dere Teacher-Except the oner
with pleasure. Always keep mi en-
gagements with the ladies. Will be
at the tristing place at p. m."-Argo-
naut
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
No EXPOSURE For Him

The member of the legislature of
whom some graft stories had been cir
culated was about to build house.
You will want a southern exposure.
SUPPOSE" asked the architect
mo. sirr' said the man. IF YOU
can't build this house without any ex-
posture I'll get another architect
Yonkers Statesman
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Hop Pillows For Insomnia.

George III. derived great benefit
from the hop pillow prescribed for him
drugs had failed, and a similar remedy
was eminently successful in 1871 with
his late majesty King Edward VII.
then Prince of Wales. who was suffer
ing from typhoid fever.-London Tele-
DraDh
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Wise Move

Bills-Why are you so anxious to
get a typewriter whose first name is
the same as your wife's?
Wills-So that my wife won't trap
me if ! get to murmuring the type
writer's name In my sleep.-Pittsburg
Press
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
A Shock Absorber.

Didn't you feel tiInid about kissing
your beau at first?'
Those things come about gradual
ly." explained the dear girl. II began
by kissing Ferdinand through my
veil."-Kansas City Journal
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
A Definition.

Pa" said little Willie Wantaknow.
what is don't worry philosopher"
"He is man who makes his living.
my son. worrying about other peoples
WORRIES" said Mr. Wantaknow.-Har
per's Weekly
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
The Awful Question,

There's new one that the kids are
asking their long suffering parents.
Say, nom. did you hear about them
goin' to take the census over again?"
For goodness sake. why?"
ITO find y."-Philadeiphia Times.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Business For All.

MOther-Why should we make Will
lie doctor when there are SO many
new doctors every year?
Father-But think of all the new all
mentsi-Stray Stories.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
Proper Thinq.

Mrs. Mybes-ls she bringing up her
daughters properly?
Mrs. Styles-Oh. yes: they're all hob
bled!Yonkers Statesman.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
His Nightmare.

MOther-Johnnle. wake up. You're
sObbing in your sleep. What's the
matter?
JOhnnie-Oh. muvver, 1 dreamed they
was going to have a sane Christmas
Harper's Bazaar
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04
No Weight Reduction In prososc..

Mr.. Nervee-WiIl you be mine?
Miss Plumpleigh-You ask so much.
Mr.. Nervee-I know 1t. but you don't
seem to be getting any smaller.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04

It II Of no use to wait for our ship
to come in unless we have sent one
sut.-Anol.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1911-01-04

Nashville is to have another,
daily newspaper. A stock comp
any has been organized with 100,-
600 capital. 1t is proposed to be-
gin publication December 26.
Warmed over potatoes and love
affairs will never be able to pass
! for the original article.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
Mt. VERNON NEWS

Nit. Vernon, S. D.-Mrs. Mary
Gary went up to Pierre last week for
a months visit with her sister, Mrs.
Fred Villas.
Ed Fitch returned to Lennon the
first OF the week after a few days
visit with the folks.
Born, to Mr.. and Mrs. Matlick,
Monday, Nov. 30. A son.
Mrs. Chas. Huerman, and Mrs.
G. Heisch have been on the sick list
the past week.
Mrs. Perry, of Alexandria, wa the
weekend guest at the Biercc home.
Il. y. Mccormack, of Sioux City,
was i'll town the first of the week.
Miss Nellie Owens. of Mitchell,
spent Saturday and Sunday at the
home.
The two children of Mr.. and Mrs.
&. H. Smith have been sick the past
week with wllooping cough. Mrs. Ar,
Earl was here from Plankinton
last week visiting her parents, MIR
and Mrs. Geo. Dougherty.
Mrs. j. NJ. Pearson was operated
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
upon at the Mitchell hospital Sum

upon ~ tho Ni,o,,on ,,o..;.a, g.,
day 'se'ie' Aosp'''i "u'-
III,
taiuca about fourteen al seven
O'Clock dinner WeGnosdnv nveoin~
Miss Laurc,ta C%orrin pton le,t
Tuesday for Canton whn.a s,,a VIII
enter Ausustana c]ollepa
Robert Roantree was Eere from
Rock Valley. la. "Wednesday rcnew-
ing old acquaintance.
NJ. j. %Dougherty and family re-
turned Sunday from u few week
Visit in Ohio and other eastern
points.
Mrs. John Warner came home from
the Mitchell hospital Wednesday hnt
in , rooI,ln onnli.ta. ool
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
FIRST TAFT CLUB
IN STATE FORMED
ENTHUSIASTIC GATHERING AT
HURON PROMISES TO BOOST
FOR STATE RALLY LATER.

Huron. S. D.-A Taft club has
been organized in this city, with the
immediate object in view that OF
boosting the proposed state Taft rally
probably to be held in this city next
month.
L. L. Abel, candidate for lieuten-
ant governor, is president: L. G.
Kemp vice president: d. b. Nicolas
key. secretary! and NJ. y. Wishman,
treasurer.
The executive committee held a
meeting yesterday afternoon, which
was said to be highly enthusiastic.
The following make up this commit
tee: DR.. J. NJ. Chambers. Sam
Birks. G. a. Kelley, George Kerr. G.
A. Blake, G. N. McIlvaine, George
Fullinweider, Max Royhl, E. II.
Vance, j.. L. Scott, Il. G. Gibbs.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30


Dec. .. 1911, sale o commence at
10 O'Clock, when the following prop
orty will be sold: - head of horses;
head OF cattle; some choice Duroc-
Jersey hogs. Farm machinery: One
lS-inch sulky piow: S-foot disc; >
foot mower; Avery corn pillow: truck
wagon: sweep rake: new wagon:
Concern harness; . hay racks; road
cart. and many other things useful
on the farm. Free lunch at noon.
Terms OF Sale: All sums Of $40
and under cash; on sums over that
amount time will be givei, until Oct.
], 1912, on notes bearing 10 per cent
interest with approved security.
Arthur Miller, a%uctionecr, l.. j.
WEIGH, clerk.
John OcheNrec, Owner.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
MANUFACTURES IN SOUTH
DAKOTA.

while the manufacturing industr,
In South Dakota is comparativel,
] small, II is showing, according to ;
I. recent census bullcting. so rapid Q
4rowth that in, time 1t will attain
respectable dimensions. The total
value Of manufactured products in
South Dakota for 1909 is given as
3i7.s7o.ooo. US compared with 49,
$4,000 In 1899 and $13, 085, 900 in
I 1905 II this rate Of increase is con-
tinued, the year 1919 will see South
] Dakota producing over $4,000 900
worth OF manufactured products
each year. Tho percentage Of in
crease should increase rather than
diminish for the! state has reached
that period in development wher
more capital will seek investment In
manufacturers. It is always the case
With any agricultural section that
at nrst capital and labor are bent
upon the development Of the farm
Ing industry. Later on, when that
has become established and It has
brought together q large and per-
manent population. the advantages
Of manufacturing at homo the pro-
ducts usde by that %populace becomes
more apparent. This is why Iowa
has been rapidly developing in the
manufacturing industry. notwith-
standing there has been an actual
loss Of population because Of emf
grafton from the farms to newer
& q the value Of products. the Hour
and srist mills Of the state lead the
list. With = total OF $G.20s.O 600; the
butter. and cheese plants are second,
With 32.6s6.000; and the printing
an6spublishing business is third with
When the value added
el4Ylala,anlptfacturs y considered, how
FCES[-$sar.SESEIF4 isll 49,. E
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
Attend the box social at Lincoln
School formerly called Dondelinger
school, Dec. G., s O'Clock.
Miss Lena Mewhirter,
kH.Aa1-.
PUBLIC SALE.

l will hold IL public auction Of my
personal property On my farm, in
Lisbon township. 4 miles south and
5 miles west of Mitchell, on Tuesday,
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
OFFICIAL COUNTY PAPER
THEFT M THEFT.

One OF the results CT the failur,
q the Carnegie Trust Company o,
New York City, in the panic Of 1907
e the conviction this week of VIII.
lam j. Cufnmins. the real head OF
] the Institution, on a.~harse of grand
larceny. The exact accusation was
that he appropriated to his ri uses
$4,000 Of trust funds belonging to
blank allied with the Carnegie Com
pany. Unless the conviction is set
aside. Cummins will serve from Eve
to ten years in federal prison. 1t
VAL be generally recognized that, as
suming the charge to be true. the
punishment is we'll deserved. 1t will
y REGARDED by everybody as a SER
ious o6ense that Cummins should
i have taken $4,000 that did not be-
long to him.
There Is another law on the federal
Statute books which declares that
apy one is q criminal and subject to
renitentiary sentence, who %conspires
torestrain competition n thus
creates q monopoly. Having estab-
lished q monopoly, such a criminal
may collect 100000 in unreasonable
profits on sales in q week or al
day.sif he Is backed by q characteris-
ticsally powerful aggregation Of
wealth. II ho we're to do business
lawfully. he would not secure the
$4,000 in additional profits. Since
hesands It necessary to violate the
law In order to secure 1t. he is no
les = thief than is Wilma J. Cum
Minis.
But this provision Of the anti-trust
law has never been enforced, with the
ssingle exception, We believe, OF the
case against the turpentine trust. The
meat packers of Chicago are under
criminal indictment and If convicted
may Be ordered to wear stripes. And
q: 4. they are guilty of doing what the
q: teey e : says they are doing, they
ought to 80 to prison. x
Me..hHE &JMfEEE
AZ all events. It should be no less /:
Dsrmissible for q banker to take I
money that does not belong to him !
than for the head of a great indus I
trial trial organization to do SO. And not I
until mt that fact is actually demon i
stfateds In the enforcement of our t
laws can II be said that the law is
respecter Of persons. h
]. m-\sex n
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30
SMITH ON VETERINARY BoARr>

Pierre, s. D.-Governor Wesley
has appointed S. NJ. Smith. Of Mitch
ell, a member of the state veterinary
examining board, in place of J.. A.
Graham of Sioux Falls, whose term
has expired.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30

Mr.. Charles Heineman and Miss
Grace Dixon We're married Monday
morning at 10 O'Clock in the auditor
ium Of the First Methodist Episcopal
church, the pastor, DR.. H%oagland,
performing the ceremony. They were
accompanied at the altar by Mr.. and
Mrs. George Steinfeld of east First
Avenue OF this city, who arc friends
of the contracting parties. Mrs. Hei-
ema is one of the charming young
ladies OF Alexandria, where she is
popular and we'll known The groom
is Il of the substantial young men
OF Hanson county and u successful
farmer. In a few weeks the young
people will be at home on their farm
just north Of Alexandria where they
will be at home to their friends. They
have the congratulations and good
OF u host of friends.
Cornelius Aykens, OF Yankton, and
Miss Rosetta Fox, Of HaZelton, Pa,
united in marriage this morn
Ing by Judge Drake at 10 O'Clock,
when the young couple called at his
office to have the ceremony per-
They departed on the
south Milwaukee passenger for
Yankton.
Born, to Mr.. and Mrs. Roy A..
Hopkins, Of Redfield, in this city at
he home Of Mrs. S. p. Watkins,
of Mrs. Hopkins. Sunday,
Nov. &c, 1911, u daughter.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30

essr sAe sriastns AMI eahai.A4a.
feuAiasss sa inr Ia tAe lead. With u,
aso.aaN 10 Its credit. as o pare.
vita sSs@~,eee fer The foar mill:
AMI t3fSioao for the areameries
This Is because tho produe, % Ia,
printing plant includes q large pro
portion OF labor value. In the ease
of the -four mills and ereanerles, the
raw material purchased. the grains
an1 milk, constitute the main part
OF the cost of the products. In the
number of worknen employed, also,
the printing aud publishing business
is far in the lead of all others. with
a total Of S25, the second largest
number, 451. being employed in
plants making lumber and timber
products.
Most of the printing plants in the
are small, 72 employing no
help and 800 having from one TO
five employees. Only four in the
state employ from 81 to so people
and u of these four is The Mitchell
Company.
The growth of the state in the
past decade is reflected still further
n the figures showing the ag-
circulation of newspapers
within the state to have
increased from 232,166 to 4s5,1O1,
Y to have more than doubled. Of
his total the 10 dailies in the state
% to 46,l53 readers, while the 360i,
lceklies have an aggregate c%ircula-
of 277,127. 1t is clear that
outh Dakota people are lookingl'
ana more to their home papers /,
their news. This is shown most
by the increase in the circu- $
.tion OF the dailies from 1G,4C3 in {
899, to aG,153 in 1909, a growth {
+ 500 per cent. The daily papers {.
I the state are steadily improving /
quality and it is certain that they y
Ill enjoy in the next ten years a :
rowth quito commensurate with !
lat in the past decade. +
Dee<M I
l.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30

Robert Emmett Dodwell, of Artes-
ian, is the president of the National
Press Association, and he was very
much in evidence in landing the on
vention for Sioux Falls and South
Dakota. Through the hudreds OF
newspapers represented by these men
the state and many of the cities will
receive Il vast amount of advertising.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1911-11-30

Mr.. and Mrs. n. Is. Test and Mrs.
Hannah koll departed this morning
via the Milwaukee road for West
Palm Beach, Fla. where they will
spend the winter season. Mr.. Test
expects to build Il cottage there.
Mrs. A f. Test and children left
this morning for Maynard. Ncb., to
make Il visit with relatives.
The Mitchell band is scheduled to
practice this evening, and all the