The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-02-19

found upon his person. such nc d;a
gram showing where Honorable cum
mlns' Will place stepladder on hack
Pprch OF White house, "Blue print Of
noh' Iaft's mind when Hon. Hitch
CO ceGk Ierused to be impelled with toe
mittee," Photograph record show. how
1ng long intervals of silence at OYSTER
Say and measurements of the nor.
orable hole into which congress tbrows
bliilon dollars each year, % Just yybep
cae excitement ran highest, it was dis.
covered That the pseudo spy was Rich
war scare p"Ae'o
BIythe enough was the snr;pbtlv
CLERK who announced to the diners that
the house had passed the recinroc;tv
Dill, which he held in his hand Rnt he
cut an awful figure a few minntas
iater as he emerged from the door of
Ine senate chamber, with his clothes
~ 1atters, ms hat knocked over his ewes
all that was left of Reciprocity ),
Grilling OF Victims.
Then for moment the dinine hall
%l,h lts exQulsltely beautiful floral EN-
pelllshments, was plunged into black
ness, and the great fiery pridiron over
President Taft's head faded away. In
sepulchral tones a lecturer lifted bie
voice amid the chill silence. and dis.
coursed mournfully. and then in turn
with pungent wit upon public men and
measures, and shrieks Of laughter were
heard rs a remorseless spot light was
directed upon the shrinking victims of
his shafts of wit as they We're each in
order disclosed TO, their fellow guests,
Thinking that he had quieted all op-
position In disposlng of the "comniittee
Of Fifteen the newly-installed presi.
dent Of the club had been lulled into
false security. Before his verv eyes
big table was spread like magic in the
open space below his seat, and in a
full blast over his protests. It an.
peared that there were insurgents even
in the Gridiron club. and they had
taken this method of showing their in.
dependence. They utterly disreparded
the president of the club and smuelv
constituted themselves a MUTUAL admi.
ration society.
cit is perfectly wonderful how we
do 1t (meanlng the dinner), says one
"It is amazing that newspaper men
should have so much talent, - volunteers
another, to which n third gravely as
sents. " However we admit it - No.
table guests had these insurgents. too
Among them were counterfeit present.
ments of Carnegie, Tawney, Cannon
sherman. Beveridge, Fairbanks and
Champ Clark Gall Of whom were pres.
and these were called upon in turn to
briefly address the diners Each of the
little speeches was a bit of delicious
parody uDon the we'll known oratorical
styles Of the originals. Carnegie, for
instance, objected TO the number of
windows architects placed in his libra
rles. as not affording dead wall space in
places for his own name.
and his ambition was ''to die poor. but
-
Tawney and Economy.
Tawney was bitterly opposed 10 more
battleships. and economy was his watch
word, but he stood for public buildings
galore. and for the many creeks that
needed deepening.
Fairbanks had never attended more
Joyous dinner. wherefore he felt called
upon to add 70 the hilarity by a few
words "in tribute TO the great leaders
who rested beneath the mossy tomb
stones on yonder hills He had men
toned them at the preceding club din
ner. but felt justified in recurring to
the subject because "they are still
dead
Vice President Sherman s double told
the inevitable aDecdote only in This
case it was unspeakably aged and shop
worn, which can never be said of the
original article. He would like to be
n newspaper man. ''Let me but write
the political news Of the nation. and
the old guard win get the votes. said
he.
Beveridge's representative "stood
fearlessly for the uplift.' In fact, he
was the uplift himself. He bad never
missed an opportunity to make speech
and indeed, he chad made great
many when there were no opportuni- !
ties Champ Clark was fairly OBJ |
scessed with his love for Uncle Joe. |
but of course that had nothing TO do
with the fact that che VIII be fuss |,
ing around on the floor Of the house !
when T am UP in the speaker S chair.
All of the speakers, by singular CO
incidence, expressed their undylng ad-
of the Gridiron club, mo
member OF which had ever betrayed
their confidence
Valentines Distributed.
Though few days after the sentI'
mental saints annual visitation, the
Gridiron club was resolved that its
ruests should not suffer for their val
rntines, and the pretty miss1vcs were
personally bestowed upon the favored
ones between courses by n two hundred
pound Cupid with diaphanous wings
(and little else), who cruelty insisted
upon proclaiming aloud each choice BIT
,f sentiment, which generally was load
ed with half concealed jest at the ex-
pense of the recipients.
Catching up and holding together the
various skits and adding to the jolllty
of the occasion were the topical songs
of the famous Gridiron quartette, re-
plete with sparkling humor yet abound