The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1911-10-31
HIS FASTIDIOUS FIANCE
Copyright, 1911. By Associated Literary Pro.s.

I'm not at all romantic. but I want
something different from Just calling
In the minister"
But how am l going to TX FOR a
balloon?" he asked
Il don't know. but that's what you'll
have to do. No balloon. no marriage"
Moses went riding through all the
villages for twenty miles around ask.
Ing questions about balloons, and Il
was two weeks before he returned to
the widow to say:
I'm willing to obleege. but we can't
get no balloon here short OF q thou
sand dollars. and mebbe not for that.
Even II we could. no preacher would
go up to marry us"
We'll. Moses. I don't want to seem
over-particular.' replied the woman
after little thought. IF we can't be
married up in balloon how about
down In a coal mine?"
That might do. II / can ind one
Moses went inquiring again. and by
and by ascertained that the nearest
coal mine was $50 miles away. and a
very wet place at that. Besides. a
minister told him that he wouldn't
descend into a coal mine and marry a
couple for less than hundred dollars
When the widow Durham had been in
formed OF how the matter stood she
replied:
i had rather set my heart on It.
but | have always been a woman to
sacrifice. Why can't we be married in
circus ring before all the people?"
why, l never heard OF such a
thing, We'd be almost took for a
couple of camels or something! No.
no."
Moses. We must be married in a
circus ring or not at ALL"
Moses made his rounds again. II
was now September, and no circus
could be expected within ten miles OF
the village until the next summer.
When he spoke to his minister about
performing the ceremony the good
man exclaimed:
"Nc-never! should be put on
trial for doing such a thing."
You don't seem to be man OF
much energy" remarked the widow
when she had heard his third excuse
Il guess We had better drop the mat
ter"
Moses begged for another chance
and after taking three days to con
slider 1t the woman said:
| Well, perhaps I'm a little too par
ticular to want balloons and coal
mines and so I'll be content with a
flying machine. You can surely get
| one OF those. / read in the papers
every day of their carrying passen
gers at the rate OF a mile a minute
Why can't We be married at the rate
| OF mile a minute?"
| Lands. woman. it would cost every
dollar we are both worth" groaned
Moses. And II we got machine and
went up it would be the preacher
again. We couldn't hire one to go
with us. Preachers amt taking
chances. don't see why we can't
| go TO preachers house or have one
come here"
| I'VE must look at the sentiment OF
the thing. It's for n woman to have
her way about such things. Moses. is
there a tall tree anywhere around
| here?"
YES. there's big elm about a
mile beyond the bridge"
Can you build n platform In the
top and then run ladders up?"
Lands. but do you want to be mar
ried in a tree-top!"
II do. You have disappointed me
| about the other things. but you mustn't
| about this.
Moses went out to survey the tree
! at close range. and to talk to carpen-
tiers and the ministers. The carpen.
ters said IL could be done, but when
the minister was approached he re-
piled with a SILVER:
What? Climb a tree 70 marry a
couple! You can have little respect
for the cloth TO propose such a thing"
The good man consented. however,
to call on the widow as a mediator,
and he did call. and after arguments
/ lasting two hours n compromise was
| erected. The marriage was to take
place from platform on top OF q
| haystack, and two weeks later It came
| OF with the whole village as spec.
tntors. Later on. when the bride was
asked why she was so bent on the
| unusual she smiled and replied:
why, | suppose I was put out TO
think | had been a widow for eight
| years before any man asked me TO
marry him"