New-York tribune., 1911-04-16
NATIONAL TOpLTNERS
BY JAMES HAY. JR.

streets has TO be preceded by a runner to
clear the way.
As Haskin machine was rounding a cor
ncr at snail pacs IL barely touched an old
woman. who fell 20 her knees without re-
ceiving any apparent injury. Hasllin handed
a policeman his card and said:
"lt there Is any trouble about this look
me up al my hotel
The next morning he received this bill
from young native. "To killing one grand
mother, fifteen rupees
Hasln thought this was pretty cheap for
a grandmother whether She was alive or
dead, and sent the youth check for the
seven dollars and twenty cents.
CAPTAIN ARCHIBALD W. BUTT. the
President military aide was called out
of bed az nine o clock one morning 20 answer
d telephone call
Archie. said his friend on the other end
OF the wire, 81 called YOU up TO tell YOU that
! shall not be able 20 keep the appointment
| made with YOU for eleven o'clock today.
I'm sorry, said Butt, bis tone a tr,hc
chilly.
"Yes; it's too bad, agreed the other.
There ensued an ominous pause.
"You know remarked Butt sentcn-
tlously, "telephonng seems 10 be a habit q
bad habit, IN Washington. People are be
ginning 10 ISSUE their invitations by telc-
phone They phone Oh the slightest prov
ocatlon. They don't seem 10 know when
not 90 telephone They even get YOU out of
bed % talk 60 YOU on the telephone.
I'm afraid ! annoyed YOU. and YOU re-
baWlruq me trlf. said f.Q friend
"Oh, no. contradic'ed Butt in louder
tone. My remarks are merely "a few phil
osophical reflections induced by the carly
hour Of the morning.
John X. TENER. former member Of Con
: grcs- and now Governor Of Pennsylvania.
is Sis fec, SIX inches TALL He used o. be-
professional baseball player.
TOHN MASON. the actor. was commenting
on ,hc fact that nearly al the men who
amount 20 anything ,u Washington are good
takers and effective public speakers.
"Ih,e -hiuk NOR. ot -hc v.iucot language
.ran WAS the cas-. vi'r ha.e..a.pcr ,u 3D.
little town | struck ,r \.W England com.
-,rr,i ,lc actor. 81 reached t.o ru.. '.t.
iu -.e afternoon .u. Wont .. ... .re 'u'.
.u .ncu.,g. .0-l0.l N..rr. r.g'-..~,rr -..
mouHe~.l that ...| r.r .r Boston ...
told we t. give r.-. --. .~ open ..-.-..
-o ..a .o-' this particular ..-..'r. bad.
Br ..o w.r. .,. .. '.. man behind
-.r counter. .l.r. I.r. . Boston told u.
q. ..n r.u t... .. H.e friend .. mine and
81. wan. E.r ,. ,.o. after ~e.
"H.. ..e' SSH. ..I worry -.r lips. ..u-
tocel FL. Chew -...... .ei ',i r.. open .-.
mouth. waited . ..H moments. and cone
.....l .. ..l r.- ...-i w.. Tnr ! -.
ue...t my ~.m.r. about Jones being
.~..ni e.. mine and wishing mc .o receive
good treatment,
~Tle '.n ..rr.. person .how.i 20 silence
-.r fully t.ro. minutes. ren. a- made
omore F.. 60. D. said i-rIv. Well wh.. lo
~os w-o. me 20 l., Kiss you,
p REPRESENTATIVE DAVIS Of We.
II N-~1.u. wandered into 'ac \a"0ra.
Pr Club One evening on Due oI Ibis visits
20 Washington and called loudly .or court
plaster.
-W...'- ..e ma--,r,~ asked aestauier.
"I'r. .t. mr finger very badly. replied
D... holding ur w,.l. finger L-ui.-et
W,-. handkerchief.
How l,l r.u 5.t-,'
~Oa safety razor. De explained.
TIL Inv. -t. Won ~..--t.- .-.---. WAS .-r-