davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

in the comeback class I thought I was
the wise old owl and when Edna be-
came Ilrs. Oscar Lewisohn I suppos ed
that she was on the retired INST for fair.
What's the reason DO you suppossf 2
According to an that can learn, this
Lewisohn man has It to light cigar
cites with and Is ELS free with the
salad as though he owned a market
garden the size Of Alaska. But there
must be something back Of It all Why
here We were reading all about how
Edna had been taken up by dukes and
earls, and things and no racin' extra
was complete without q half tone of her
in the foreground. wearing a thousand
guinea gown and talkin' to the
notables.
II just can't help wonder4n' whether
Oscar has had some financial reverses
and told Edna that she'll have to let
the cook went and get wise to the six
O'Clock risin' racket, and to be care
full about putting benzine on the kin
ding. II such is the case, don't
wonder that Edna Is some peeved and
wants to come back to those dear old
United States, where one million Broad
way Johns stand ready to place their
buzz wagons and their bank rolls at
her disposal
There must be rift in the lutte
some place. and I suspected as much
when the little lady made an appear
ance in q home talent affair some
months ago, and the press went dippy
about her."
That Depends
do you think that she really will
come backf' asked the s. s. Y.
KID" said the s. D. K severely "the
rTmor is not yet verified that she
wants to come back. But there Is one
thing certain, and that Is that the two
a-day houses are not goin' to establish
any dangerous precedent like engagln'
star at $25o0 a week to do six shows.
Nix. not when fourteen is the usual
dose.
But imagine that q great deal will
depend on Oscar. II he looks like mis-
pictures t may take something more
than ambition to move him.
But II she does como and they re-
vive the Belle Of New York" I will
be tempted, old as I am, to follow
on" ..
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

polished the arm Of the chair as you
sat down. Also by the bars on your
shirt. Continue. or rather, begin,
please"
Every morning" explained the
bartender, biting his tongue ner-
vcusly, '.the very first thing I do upon
arising is to look out the window
and refresh myself with q glance at
the magnificent oak tree that my
Ereat-grandfather planted more than
two hundred years ago. You cannot
know, sir, what that tree has come
to mean to me. This morning. II was
not there when looked out the win
dow. I rushed to you"
How many windows are In your
room7" asked the great detective,
after regarding the third knuckle on
hfs right hand stesdfastly for full
half minute.
"Two. One looks out upon the
yard: the other upon my neighbors
property"
And which one did you look out
Of this morning.
With a glad shout, the bartende er
tossed the great detective a season
pass good on all schooners and burst
from the room
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Vest Pocket ESSAYS
NCESTORS are found along with
old furniture and captive skele-

~ old furniture and captive skele-
- tons in all of our best regu-
lated families. Ancestors consist
of forefathers and foremothers, to say
nothing of foreuncles and aunts, who
have done something grand or noble,
like being beheaded by a king or hav-
ing a relative who was governor of a
colony. This enables them to be point
ed at with pride by their descendants
forever more.
Being an ancestor is one Of the
easiest and most attractive Of jobs.
1t merely consists Of being boosted by
ones descendants. Thus, many ances-
tors have been enabled to make good
after they are dead. More than one
ancestor who has gone out of this life
a poor person, and only a few jumps
ahead of the sheriff, has had the good
fortune, a century later. to become the
ancestor of some ambitious family with
plenty of money, and has become so
famous in consequence that his tomb
stone has had to be greatly enlarged
and improved.
Ancestors are one Of the most valu-
able and satisfactory of possessions.
They are non-taxable and cannot be
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

existed and sed, Sammy, that shuttir
must be In your room. I've bin In evry
othir room In the house.
Wat, I sed.
Are you de1, sed pop. sed that
shuttir must be banging In heer.
The wind ony bloc my shuttiP
wunce. sed, dident It, Benny, and
Benny sed, Yes, only wunce. I counted
It. wich was the truth.
Well. thares sumthing funny, sed
pop, there's sumthing funny, and he
was Jest going out Of the room agen
wen he tripped ovir the string and
nocked his nee sumthing fearss
agenst the bed. saying things wich
I wood get the dickins II I sed. evin
II 1 fell awl the way down stares,
mutch less nocking my nee.
Aren't you a shamed, sed ma to
pop, kuming to the doar. and pop and
ma went DOWNSTAIRS and We didens
pull the string eny moar.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

causes all de trouble in dis heah
varld.
"Ah wants a small japanese stew"
pat's jes' what he ak TO- "a small
Japanese stew!" In all ma bon days
nsvah hear sech an order, and 1 say,
polite like, Beg pahdon, sah?"
"A small japanese stew!' he yellsp
night in ma ear. is yo' deaf, or
xhat?" he says.
Well, All goes back to DO kitchen
ald says to de cook, confident easy
like, "One small Japanese stew" Now
de cook amt any too fond @ me no.
how, and when dat order passed desc
lips o. mine he said things dat no
Genleman would take Il upon him
self to repeat, not to speak o. throw
Ia sevural promiskis like articles at
my haid.
Make it conn beef hasn't" yells,
and ] takes the cohn beef hash back
70 the inherent looisin' fellow, and
dokgone ef he don't eat 1: q II dat's
what he's expectin' all long. But Use
acaired O. ma iife To- to enter DAT
thare kitchen ever sence.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

lunch
di'rent telhn just what Belle IT
awful jerk the of block the cars stopped
let passenger and the jerks half as long and the
speeds sudden after it. it's stopped
chance o jump off while the cars in motion
Shut Your Eyes and Guess Next Time
the knocks half dozen down tyn to hang
himself the back window the poles off the and the motor
echangn compliments seconds before the
when wagons end the track while it's shootn
:oald cellar from the other end.
Nobody for at coal
Such passengers feins Belle they're really
There's always ladies the the
themselves and the ladies can't expression their
Utmost thoughts n O the gentlemen present
So when e conductor his trained mouth and lets the
wagon driver broadside the
bad habit keeps the from nden him
thanks The conductor this morning exhausted
block and had his pride
wouldn't let him repeat
pose Belle, people have in COAL and spose
can't @ from Twin streets with tracks but
relief when things fixed eveybodyl
delivered from aoplan coal and shot
the roof hate think the though the
the aeoplane coal while its
'front.' coal yard
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Getting On.

Lewis Cass Ledyard, at a luncheon at
Newport. smiled at the efforts OF a ncu-
veau richie family to pu.h its way into
society.
But the Nouveaux Riches are getting
on" he said. 81 understand that Mrs
Nouveau Richie is bcasting that she ~
snubbed by a better class of people each
year."-New York Press.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Secret Worth It.

Little Violet was one day examining
beehive, which was new to her. Be-
ing disturbed, the bees came out Of
their hives and one of them stung her.
Tears came into her eyes, but she
quickly dried them and cried triumph
antly Nov, 1 know who takes the
needles out of mamma's cushion
Pittsburgh Leader.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
An International
Hash of Wit
ENGLISH Joke FOR TODAY

Advt. of some villas to let. hard by
the crematorium, at Golden's Green,
hangs out as a bait the line: "A stones
throw from electric cars to Finchley.
MILESTONE and Barnet" Thus one sees
how tenants can put in the dull Sun
day afternoons-sitting on the doorstep
and throwing stones at the electric cars
to Ffnchley, milestone and Barnet
The Pink I'm.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
THE STAGE DOORKEEPER

III see" said the stage struck youth
aS he pinned his salary in his pocket
With a safety pin that Edna May has
announced that she would listen to a
pfoposition from the New York manag-
ess for ten weeks at $500 week, with
oct mats or Sunday shows"
f'Yes" said the stage doorkeeper wear
Nf 'I guess we'll have to put Edna
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Our Cullud Waiter
Saws, Such a Day!

i'Clare to goodness, All haint neb-
Der experienced such a day sense All
come to wuk in dis heah place. He
was sech a innercent lookin' GUS
tomah dat nevah expected havin' no
sech q time befoah / was froo wild
him, but let me tell you, de inherent
l0kin' folks is Jest the ones wat
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Sense Of Duty.

1--WE had quite thrilling rescue here
yesterday. but don't see anything in
the papers about it,
'iOhi There was nothing interesting
about that; the woman was rescued by
her own husband"
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Beats The Dutch.

D'Auber-Your daughter paints in the
Dutch school, does she not?
Mrs. Newrtch-Not much, she don't
We pay $50 quarter to give her pri-
vate lessons at home. Dutch school, in
deed!-Philadelphia Record
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
GOOD STUFF

Your ode to Niagara IL the real
thing. felt that way when I hrst
saw the falls"
'T have never seen the falls" sx-
planned the poet. II got the idea
from reading railway booklet
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Brain Work.

"Does your husband help you much
around the houseT" asked the nsighbor
WELL replied the tired looking wom-
an, "Josiah's work Is mostly brain
work. He keeps right busy thinkiu' up
ways for me TO economic. Exchange
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Literary Mixture.

What we want" said the publisher,
is the terse, hard-hitting modern style
of expression"
Il know" replied the writing person;
''the stuff that sounds like profanity
with a little benzoate Of soda in it.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Self-Supporting.

Lady Ito loafer who has asked for
moneyl-You'Y only drink il, suppose,
instead of taking It home to your wife.
Loafer-I ain't got wife, Idly. Tn
ea:ntn' me own living.-F Inch.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Like a Man

Fond Mother-Did young Mr.. Watkyn
show much interest in the old masters
at the art exhibition7
Aunt ChIoe-No, he seemed to take
much more interest In the young
missus.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Not the Same

Pendennis-Did you see Hooker when
he came In from fshingf
warrington-Yes; was on the pier.
Were there any fish lying about
himr
mo; he was lying about the nsh."
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Woodman, Spare It;
Or, Quick Deduction

you are q bartender" remarked
the great detective, just as his visi-
tor was opening his mouth to speak
How
How do I know interrupted the
great detective. by the way yo0
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
Lack Of Enterprise.

"Behold tho ruins of Pompsii''
Been this way long?"
Some eighteen hundred years."
Bah! We had San Francisco rebuilt
in less than six months. .'-Exchange.
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

fERE ought to be law passed, Belle. There ought
to be law passed either maxim trolley cars
smaller around the hips coal wagons more re-
trim around the drivers seat and the front wheels
cars and coal wagons amt compatible, the
papers put it.
Now that people are startin' in to build up
their annual coal bills, the coal wagon drivers are
havin' the time o their lives playin' their little
game of stop the coal wagon" you swear
first" My car was blocked so many times this
mornin that by the time got down to- the place
The Washington times., 1911-10-09

stolen. Their upkeep is practically
nothing. and they do not deteriorate
with age or neglect. In fact they in
crease in value as they grow older. An
ancestor 800 years old Is worth q
whole mass meeting of fifty-year-old
ancestors. Adam is the oldest ancestor.
He is 5000 years old, and had fine
record. But he is common possession,
The Washington times., 1911-10-09
THE REAL LOVE LETTERS
: That He Received
; Telling the Plans
OF HIS BRIDE TO BE

EAREST: The tears are very close to my eyes, and
/ feel as if veil that had long hung between me
and other women had been torn away and had
for an instant, woman-not as the individual.
but as My Sex, sex Of which part, with
the same hopes and fears and dreams
Dear, had letter from Aunt Marietta this
morning. You know wrote you yesterday that
on impulse I had asked her to be my maid of
honor, and today she has refused. Refused not
ton that she is too old"
Little niece" she wrote, your impulsive cry
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
A NOtre Dame Lady's Appeal.

To all knowing sufferers of rheu-
matism, whether musclar or of the
joints, sciatica lumbago, backache,
pains in the kidneys or neuralgia
pains, to write to her for a home
treatment which has repeadily cured
all Of these tortures. She feels it her
duty to send it to all sufferers FREE.
You cure yourself at home as thous-
ands will testify-no change of eli
mate being necessary. This Simple
discovery 'banishes uric acid from the
blood, loosens the stiffned joints, pur-
ifies the blood, and brightens the eyes
giving elasticity and tone to the whole
system. If the above interests You
for proof address Mrs. NJ. Summers
Box R, Notre Dame, Ind.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
APPLICATION FOR CHARTER.
GEORGIA-Sumter County.

= the Superior Court of Said County:
"ne petition of Ware G. Martin, j.
Sheppard, w. S. Andrews, ]. 0.
Macarthur and Lucius L. McClesky re-
specially showeth:
l. That they and their associates de-
sire to become incorporated under
name and style of Americas Security
Company, with head office at Americas,
Ga, and with power to establish such
branch offices and agencies as may be
deemed convenient for the carrying on
Of the Company's business.
II. The object of said Corporation is
to be pecuniary gain for its stock
holders.
III. The particular business to be
carried on by said Corporation is the
buying, selling and dealing in real es-
tate. stocks, bonds and other securities,
the promoting and fostering enter
prises and the negotiating and plac-
ing of loans of money, acting as tru5-
tees for others and renting and leasing
out real estate, collecting money and
making investments for others, and
doing general fire and life insurance
/ business, dealing in lumber and build
| ing material, contracting for building
of houses and improving real estate
generally, also abstracting and guar
Ianteeing titles
| ". The capital stock of said Cor
Iporation to be Fifty Thousand Dollars
with privilege of increasing same tt
any amount not exceeding Two Hun
bred and Fifty Thousand Dollars. Said
capital stock to be divided into shares
| of the par value of One Hundred Dol
liars each, ten per cent. of which is to
be paid into the treasury Of the Com
pany before commencing business.
V. Wherefore petitioners pray to be
! incorporated as aforesaid with all the
rights, powers and privileges for car
rying on this business for and during
term of Twenty years, with right Of
renewal of charter at expiration Of
said time, with power to sue and be
sued, and to use a corporate seal
make bylaws and wit hall the powers
of Corporations generally under laws
tof Georgia.
SHIPP & SHEPPARD,
Petitioners Attorneys.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
0rdinary'S Sale,
RGIA-Sumter County,

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
By virtue of an order of the Court of
Ordinary of said County, will be sold at
public cutlery on the first Tuesday in
April, 1911, at the court house in
said County, between the usual hours
of sale, the following real estate, sit
uated in the city of Americas, Sumter
County Georgia, to-wit:
A certain house and lot situated on
tn west side of Lee street in the city
of Americas, Sumter County, Georgia,
bounded on the east by Lee street, on
the south by the property Of W. A.
Dodson, on the west by an alley, and
the north by the property Of Ben Il,
Worthy.
Also one half share of stock in the
Americas Grocery Co., Americas, Ga
The sale will continue from day TO
day between the same hours until SAID
property is sold Terms cash.
G. S. GLOVER,
Administrator, Estate G. w. Glover
Deceased.
9-4t-pd
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
Administrators Sale.

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
Pursuant to an order of the Ordin-
airy OF Sumter County, Ga, regularly
granted. will be sold before the courr-
Louise deer in said County between the
legal hours of sale on the first Tues
day in april, 1911, a certain vacant
lot consisting of one-half acre, more
or less, situated In the town of Leslie
fronting east on Bailey avenue, az
joining the residence lots of DR.. A
J. Kemp, Mrs. ]. H. Williams and Mrs
VI c. Anderson. Terms cash.
MRS. NJ. C. ANDERSON,
Admx. Est B. " Lightfoo-.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
SENSIBLE VIEW OF
MEXICAN MATTER
War Would Not Be Endorsed
By Americans
washington Post.)

If Mexico were to plant a large army
and navy on the edge of the United
States. with the announcement that
these forces were to be used against
us in case we did not handle our affai 5
to suit Mexico, what would happen?
Mexico is a peaceful neighbor of the
United States. 1t has scrupulously OBJ
served American rights, and has not
committed any act of hostility. Mex
ico's troubles are her own. Why, then,
should the United States make an
armed demonstration against Mexico?
If nothing happens on the Mexican
DO der this great military demonstra-
ton Will have cost the United States a
lot of money uselessly. If something
does happen, it viii be because the
United States has precipitated it by
this warlike move.
We are convinced that the people Of
the United States do not want war.
They do not want Mexico, and they do
not wish to intermeddle in Mexico's in
ternaI troubles. They do not care
whether Diaz or the revoluuonists win.
They are concerned with their own
affairs, and are anxious that this coun-
try should be at peace abroad and
tranquil at home, so every man may
devote himself to his own business.
1t would be an irrevocable step if an
American army should enter Mexico.
No man can tell the consequence Of
such a move. The effect upon the ad-
ministration, the changed relations
with Mexico and the rest of Latin
America, the attitude of foreign pow
ers-these are a sealed book. All that
can be said with certainty is that any
step in the direction of the occupation
of Mexico is most momentous and far
reaching and should be considered
long and carefully.
The massing of troops on the Mexi-
can border is a step toward the occu-
patton of Mexico 1t may not be so
intended, but the effect may be the
same as if the order contemplated the
capture OF the City of Mexico If a
clash should occur between American
and Mexican troops, the American
army will march forward. 1t will
never turn backward until the City Ct
Mexico is occupied and perhaps not
/ then.
Nothing is easier than to make a
demonstration of military force. The
military advisers of the President may
be depended upon to make the most OF
the argument that prompt display OF
force win tend to prevent trouble and
disrupt the revolution in Mexico. But
this advice is freighted with menace &c
the peace of the United States There
are greater factors involved, which the
military men may not estimate at their
full value
The situation calls for circumspec-
ton on the part of the United States
government, and a rigid control over
the troops that are pouring into Texas
and California.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
For Letters of DismisSiOn.

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
Whereas, A. c. Crockett, admin
istrator of DR.. H. s. Crockett, repre-
sents to the Court in his petition, duly
filed and entered on record
that he has fully administered
DIR. H. S. Crocketts' estate;
This is therefore to cite al
persons concerned, kindred and cred
itors, to show cause, if any they can
why said Administrator should not be
discharged from his administration
and receive letters of dismission or
the first Monday in April, 1911.
JOHN A. COBB, Ordinary
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
For Letters of Administration.
GEORGIA-sumter County.

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
To All Whom 1t May Concern
Mrs. T. C. Logan having, in proper
form applied to me for permanent Let
ers of Administration on the estate OF
DR.. H. j. Logan, late of said County
this is to cite all and singular the cred
itors and next of kin of Dr. H. J. Lo.
gan to be and appear at my office
within the time allowed by law, an(
show cause, if any they can, why per.
manent administration should not be
granted to Mrs T. c. Logan on DR.. H
J. Logan's estate. Witness my hand
and official signature, this 9Th day Of
March, 1911.
JOHN A. COBB, Ordinary
q ~
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
GEORGIA-Sumter County.

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
l, H. E. Allen, Clerk of the Superior
Court in and for said State and County,
do hereby certify that the above is a
true and correct copy of the petition
for Charter filed in my Office of Amer
icus Security Company
Given under my hand this Sth day
of March, 1911. H. E. ALLEN,
Clerk Superior Court
D-March IL W-16-23-30
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
Citation.
GEORGTA-Sumter County.

The appraisers appointed to set aside
years support out of the estate OF
Howell B. Simmons, late of said CouA-
~. deceased, to Mrs Josie P Simmons
and her three minor children, having
filed their return in this Office. TINS
is to notify all persons interested 10
file objections, if any they have, on Jr
before the first Monday in April, or
else said return will be made the juds,
ment of this Court. 9-4t-pq
This 9Th day of March, 1911.
JOHN A. COBB, Ordinary
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22
4HEUMKTl5M
WEAK KIDNEYS & THIN BLOOD

\ Not only is the blood the great
nourishing source Of our systems, but
equally as important is its work Of
removing the waste of oxodized it's
sues which have been consumed in
force and bodily heat. This waste is
filtered out through the kidneys.
When, however, the kidneys become
weak and unable to perform their
regular duties, the waste is allowed
to remain in the circulation, soon
forming uric acid which destroys the
greater portion of nourishing elements
of the blood and leave it weak and
acrid. This imperfect blood deposits
into the different muscles and joints
the uratic impurity with which it is
contaminated. Then the pains and
aches of Rheumatism commence. The
gritty formation which uric acid
causes collects in the joints and pro-
duces the aches and stiffness which
always accompany the disease. Like
wise the muscles are coated and lose
their elasticity, while the continual
irritation to the nerves produces swell
ing and inflammation of the flesh.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22

First Farmer-"say, 81" (pointing
to an airship overhead, what's that
Second Farmer-"Don't know, Hen,
lessen it's a sack @ -four. They say
it's riz So"
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22

~Ostigo was a wicked man and
O'Brien was devout worshipper, bat
was unable to get Costigo to church
until Easter Sunday When he got
there and saw how the edifice was fix
ed UP he was filled with wonder, and
calculated, 1T beats hell" Keep still,
said O'Brien, that's the intention Of
T."
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22

a woman doesn't think about
whether clothes become her; her whole
mind is bent upon whether they are in
fashion, becoming or not
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22

When you have rheumatism in your
cot or instep apply Chamberlain Lin
iment and you will get quick relief
It costs but a quarter. Why suffer?
To. sale by all dealers.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-03-22

The Past, like an inspired rhapsod-
list, fills the theatre of everlasting gen.
erations with her harmony.-Shelley