Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1911-03-17
Dinner EPISODES.
Odd Happenings That Helped to
Spice the Meals.
THE WORM THAT DIDN'T TURN

THE WORM THAT DIDN'T TURF
It Spoiled = Funny Story For q Wo
man Whose Pet Horror Is Anythin!
That WrigsIes-A Distracted Seien
fist and a Gastronomic Calamity.
At a dinner party one night my hos
and were in the midst Of an interest
ing conversation when l noticed {
movement in the lace centerpiect
which lay under a pot of growing
tulips. The lace was pushed aside. and
straight toward me wriggled fat rec
earthworm. II have pet horror II
is for anything that writhes. My host
was nearing the point Of funny story
when I caught sight Of that strange
intruder on a dining table. he reach
ed the end of the story and laughed.
] believe l laughed. but to this day
cannot tell what that story was about.
sat watching the gymnastics Of that
lively specimen Of fish bait. In forty
seconds 1t was due to tumble into my
lap There was no waiter near. The
reptile was hidden from my host by a
soup plate The man at my right was
absorbed In conversation with wom-
an beside him. The worm had almost
reached the edge Of the table when !
had an inspiration. ! turned q red
wineglass upside down. for the waiter
was approaching with a napkin wrap
ped bottle.
"Have you turned White RibbonerY'
asked my host.
For tonight have" Where my
voice came from do not know; neither
do ! know how | ever sat out that
meal listening to q host who tried bis
level best to entertain a dull guest
and watching a frantic fshworm try
to break its way out Of Jail. Some
how growing plants on the dining
table have gone out Of favor in our
house.
A dear distracted old scientist
know keeps bis wife on the anxious
seat every moment when they dine
out. She Is prepared for any ridicu.
Ious thing be will do. No one ever
possessed finer breeding or gentler
manners than the good old professor.
but bis fits Of abstraction are likely to
descend on him at any moment. His
wife tells Of one notable experience.
Zone night" she says, II lectured
John all the way home from dinner.
! was trying to make him understand
that pate shells were intended to be
eaten. II 1t had been a caterers
meal I should have thought nothing
about It. but our hostess was 6ne
cook. and she had just announced
proudly that we were having some Of
her own put paste Everybody ate
the pates except John. With the
greatest care be scooped out the
creamed chicken and left the shell.
he was horribly distressed over It.
If had only known. my DEAR he
said. that the thing was intended to
be eaten. that 1t was really food and
she made it, ! should have shown my
appreciation
"'Remember 1t next time. then,' l
said.
"A week later at another dinner
John was seated opposite me.
glanced at him curiously after the
dessert came on, for be seemed to be
in the throes Of a choking ct. 1mag-
Inc, II you can, my horror. He was
trying to masticate the paper case Of
q charlotte russo. There was only
one thing I could do-call him to order
as one would have done child. I
could not sit by calmly and watch him
choke to death. Dinners are frequent
" stupid affairs, but that one was not
after l had explained the situation to
a tableful Of people. Fortunately John
u 10 brilliant that bis absentminded-
ness is considered a natural adjunct
to genius"
my husband" said one Woman. rs
the funny man at a party when the
mood happens to seize him. One night
after playing bridge we fled out to the
dining room. where we were seated
about the table for supper. From
the corner where my husband sat
came gales Of laughter. He had turn
ed conjurer and was making every
thing disappear. from salt spoons to a
water decanter. When things were
found it was in the most remarkable
places.
+ "A week later while searching his
clothes for soiled handkerchiefs-that
b a regulation Monday morning task
In our home-1 heard something rattle
IN bis dress coat. From an inside |
pocket drew two silver forks. three !
teaspoons and 4 salt spoon. They
were marked with various initials.
None of the stuff came from our side
board. My husband was out Of town.
and l spent few perplexed hours. An
idea suddenly dawned on me. I wrap
ped up the silver, put on my hat and
went straight to the hostess Of our last
card party. Thank goodness! she
cried. 4 have nearly had nervous
prostration over the loss Of these
things. Servants have been suspected.
i hired a man to go over the garbage
H1umn and the whole hOusp has been