The Washington bee., 1911-06-17
Public Men And ThinDs
(By the Sage of the PotoInac.)

There was a discussion in the Coli
| scum the other night as to who is our
| greatest orator. You know the Col
/ llSeum IS on I4th Street, East Side,
between Wallack Place and T Street.
All the Bethel Literary Society four
hushers, pinheads and spontaneous
combuStiomsts were barred from en-
tTy as undeSIrables. Even Miles Max
held, the Old Glory announcer, failed
/ 10 get a place. In the language of
! Late Hershaw, the entries consisted
jot quantum sufficit" When the en-
| tries were all closed. it was found
that there were only four air-beaters
III the contest They were DR.. Yer
non, John Dancy, Prof. Tunnel and
Henry Lincoln Johnson. The arou-
ments were numerous. and the votes
plenty. A large size lager with four
inches of cuff on it. or a thin GLASS
containing four fingers of slow death
was a vote. Prof. Tunnel didn't get
many votes. 1t was decided his voice
was too corrugated, too megaphonic.
and his style too much English. Yer
non, DanCy and Johnson were the
favOriteS. One fellow who stood
down at the end of the foot railing in
the Cafe de St. Allen announced that
DR.. Vernon had the most musical
voice, the easiest stage action, the
most eloquence; that his words
dropped from his lips like water flow
ing over a pebbly bottom One old
walls-of-J Jericho fellow.
who was braced against tier of bar
rels containing siOw-death sourmash.
chuckled at this, and said: You sho
is shoutin' now. He's de primest
awater yit,"
But, answered another near-whis-
keyterian, Mr. Vernon is all that, but
you get the same purple grapes every
time, and he never gets through tun-
neling that mountain | like an ora
tor who hands you something new,
every time Now there's John Dancy,
he never was a prOdigious spender,
but when it comes to speaking, let me
tell you, he's the most liberal spender
of lungs around here He's some
speaker Why, John Dancy can speak
any time. anywhere, and on any sub
JeCt. He's got all the others blank
eted, you hear me mourning, do your"
The old fellow who was bracing up
the tier of slOw-death barrels asked
Whats his plexion" A North Caro-
linian, who was on Dancy's flagship
when he sailed from Wilmington to
discover New York. replied: Hes
dark enough to be recognized as al
COlOred man even in a crowd of
whites We'll, give him de lead
den.' said the old braCer Ais |
cares fer Is dat de hunk OF skin dat
awrates fer me must come in fast
cOlOrs'
A click of glasses, a dropping of
some coin, was the signal that Henry
Lincoln Johnson had been reached in
the Court of ASSlZes A man from
Georgia promptly took the cue Let
me tell you, gentlemen, he said, as
he enthusiastically regarded the beads
on four fingers of II aath Valley liquid
Henry Lincoln Johnson IS the bell
cow when 1t comes to OratOry. That
speech of his at Chicago when he
turned the tide against reducing the
SOuth's representation III National
conventions was an epic. It's like
had never before been heard. Smooth,
graceful, earnest, perfect command of
English, he's our peerless orator"
Where dis Linkum Jonsing from,
asked the barrel bracer From Geor-I
gia, sab, proudly and contemptuously
returned the ive-foot-seven Georgian
idolator. And who are he" called
back the barrel bracer IN a voice that
was glazed over with about steen
nlckel-ShOOterS. He's Recorder of
Deeds" returned the Georgian, saw
agely. What's him plexion?" An
yaller," retorted the
Georgian And by this time the
had worked to a fraz-
zle in the barrel bracer, and he lost
his balance and slid to the floor with
a dull thud. By this time eight or IoI
fellows, who were out hunting old
man Pabst and young "Trimble,' had
joined in the discussion. which lasted
until closing time. 1t was a close
race between Dancy and Johnson. but
Johnson won out. And let me tell
you, and | have heard Johnson speak
many times, he may have d few close
seconds, but when it comes to real
oratory, considering expression, style,
language, thought and originality,
that Georgia peach who draws $4,000
per for holding down that basement
job in the Court House. has every
thing in the color line backed off the
boards. And a mighty few over inI
the white Fairgrounds has got any
business sliding down his cellar door
He's an orator who got his training
under old Bill Pledger-peace 10 his
ashes-the gamest black man who
ever roamed unmolested through the
Cracker State.
~
| see Rev. Simon Peter Drew, the
sawed-off and boiIed-down would-be
ecclesiast who belongs to the deep
water Baptist contingent, is getting
all the big guns to speak at his
church He pulls United States SEN
atOrs down TO his tabernacle with a
regularity that makes the other very
erudite professors Of theology turn
green. Rev. Simon amt much Of a
preacher: that Is, | have heard better
anywhere and every place, and heI
looks, or rather dresses like a Catho-I
lis priest bound for a monastery in
the Green Mountains, but he does
know how TO separate a wise guy
from his spare change He's got a
hustle all the time. You have to give