davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A woman in Pennsylvania buried
the wrong man In mistake for her hus
band. but, when the latter turned up
alive and well. stuck to the dead man
She wisely declined to have a live Is.
sue made OF her mistake.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A woman in New York town owes
her safety to the fact that she wore
harem skirt and the trouser part gave
her freedom to run for her life SO
here is one good point registered for
the prosecuted apparel.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Poultry raising is to be taught at
Rutgers college. Somebody there
must have an idea that there are peo-
ole who do not think they know all
about raising chickens
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A Baltimore bard is trying to organ
lee poets union. but the. scheme Is
likely to fail owing to the fact that
all the applicants for membership
wish to be walking delegates.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A Boston savant announces that he
can photograph thought. Now wen
know what perfect lady really thinks
when she runs for street car End
Just misses it
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Foolish.

Il am going to ask your father
tonight for your hand in marriage"
How dreadfully old fashioned you
are"
Don't ask him; tell him."
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Some OF these decrepit old baseball
veterans who have attained the ad-
vanced age Of 33 or "a years might
land I Job selling tickets.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Among the Cannibals.

In my most successful novel;" said
Upton Sinclair, at vegetarian ban.
Quet in New York, Il aimed at the
publics heart and hit it, with my beet
talk, in the stomach.
Il was rather like the Bangala mis-.
sionary, who said:
II failed, alas, to bring tears to
those cannfbals' eyes, but at least
made their mouths water"
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Common drinking cups have been
frowned upon by law In New York.
The manufacturer of the uncommon
kind has perked up considerably.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A Lowell. Mass. COW gave seven
tons Of milk in one year. The world
would be drowned in milk II every
body kept that kind of COW.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

There seems to be a remarkable In
ernational unanimity OF opinion about
the harem skirt. It has been mobbed
In Brazil.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
To the Point.

Over in Hoboken In a shop frequent
ed by Germans, hangs sign framed
In mournful black, reading thus:
We regret to inform our honored
customers that our good and generous
friend, Mr.. Credit, expired today. He
was a noble soul, always willing and
helpful, but has been failing for some
time. May he rest in peace. PAY
CASH."
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A $40 .000. 900 bread trust is being or
ganized In New York. and we presume
that its motto will be: Half a loaf
Is better than one"
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A st. Paul man has discovered that
he Is heir to a French throne. Our
advice to him, however, Is to hang
onto the job he now has.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

The Oklahoma woman who has 10
sons. all under years Of age. is not
suffering from the lack Of something
to do.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Some Of New York's fashionable
women are carrying canes. Must be
inconvenient when they are pushing
baby buggies.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

The Chicago youth who eloped with
girl and seven trunks would make
huge SUCCESS in the express business.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
LIZ You kauA Mnneu

That fellow Gotrox is multimil,
lionaire. He has more money than
brains"
We'll, what does he want with
brains?"
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

There is still plenty Of honey in the
rock for man who has the pa
thence to keep on pegging away until
he gets II.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Ambiguous.

Obliging Shopman e. lady who has
purchased pound Of Dutter)-Shall
send 1t for you, madam? s.
Lady-No, thank you. 1t won't be
too heavy for me.
Obliging Shopman--Oh, no, madam,
I'll make it as light as l possibly
can.-Punch.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Further evidence that China Is
about to wake up. A Chicago mail
order house has shipped 10000 alarm
clocks to Picking.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

'lmbecile insanity" Is the newest
We may yet hear of insane lunacy"
II the experts run out of adjectives.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

The story persists that the monorail
system of transportation Is to go to
Alaska and grow up with the country.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
quite often.

Figg.-Two negatives make an af-
firmative, you know.
Fogg-With a woman 1t takes only
one.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

II you want thing well done, do
1t yourself-Wellingto
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Shoe manufacturers announce that
the feet Of American women are grow.
ing larger The ungallant wretches!
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

A woman's idea OF brave man is
one who isn't afraid to go into dark
closet in which there may be a mouse
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

When girl yawns it's up to the
young man to get in the. home stretch.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

: 1t sometimes happens that a street
fight reminds a married man that
there are other places like home.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

The modern man who takes up his
bed and walks is the mattress sales
man.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Johnny Knew.

Now, Johnny" said the Sunday
school superintendent, "can you tell
me what it was that caused the pro.
phet Elijah to go up?" "Yeth, thir,"
said Johnny. ut wath the Payne tar.
if bill. "--i1arper's Weekly.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Even wise man can't tell when a
woman's hat is on straight
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

II the drinking cup is to go. some
economist Of pocket space might COM
bine straw with fountain pen.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
The Difference.

The proper study of a man ia
man, you know"
Eyes, but the proper study of wo.
man IL her clothes"
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Consistent,

Doctor-You are considerably under
weight, sir. What have you been do
ing?
Patient-Nothing. But I'm q retired
grocer, doc.-Puck.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Very Much Attached

Very Much Attached.
Swenson-Why do you always hear
ship referred to as "she?"
Benson guess it is because she
sometimes becomes very much at
tached to buoy.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
The Difference.

He-"1n China fellow never sees
his wife till after they are married"
She--"How strangep In England
It's the wife who never sees her hus.
band after they are married.-M. AP
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
The Riddle.

The Riddle.
The Sphinx propounded puzzle.
why does 1t always rain the day
you move?" she asked.
Herewith the ancients gave 1t up.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Holland produces $4,000 pounds oil
butter year. Enough to butter both
sides OF her bread.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Worry, anxiety. fear, hate etc. ETC., directly
interfere with or stop the flow OF Ptyalin, the
digestive Juice of the mouth, and alse inter-
fere with the flow of the digestive juices Of
stomach and pancreas.
Therefore the mental state of the individual
has much to do (more than suspected) with
digestion.
Brain is made Of Phosphate of Potash as
the principal Mineral Salt, added to albumen
and water.
Grape-Nuts contain that element as more
than one-half Of all its mineral salts.
A healthy brain Is important, II one would
do things" In this world.
man who sneers at Mind" sneers ut the
best and least understood part OF himself
That part which some folks believe links us
to the Infinite.
Mind asks for healthy brain upon which
to act, and Nature has defined way to make
healthy brain and renew 1t day by day as 1t
is used up from work Of the previous day.
Natures way to rebuild is BY the use Of
food which supplies the things required. Brain
rebuilding material Is certainly found tn
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

Send to DR.. Kilmer 4 Co., Bingham
ton, N. Y, for sample bottle. II will
convince anyone. You will also receive
= booklet Of valuable information, telling
all about the kidneys and bladder. When
writing, be sure and mention this paper.
For sale at all drug stores. Price fifty
cents and one-dollar.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
To Keep Il Neat,

Jack, dear" ueried the fair maid
at ten ball park, why does that
man behind the hitter wear such a
big bib?"
That" explained Jack rs to keen
his shirt from getting mussed IN
when the ball knocks his teeth ort
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Swat the fly!

II all dreams came true, people
would soon quit eating mince pie.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
As Others See Us.

The Dog-"Funny beings, these hui
mans are. They teach their children
to walk on their hind feet inst like
performing dogs."-Pele Mele.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03

DhfeUTe Fortunes are made In patents. Pro-
SWe . tect your ideas Our "a page book freq
fitzgerald Co.. Box X, Washington, ID. G.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Needed the Money.

Physician-You paw ma ss0 aoun
and $40 a week.
Patient-Sounds a. II were buy.
lag motor car.
Physic.aH-No. I am.
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
Hoods SarsapariII;
A COUNTRY SCHOOL FOR GIRLS

in New York City. Best features of coun-
try and city life. Out-of-door sports on
school park of IS acres near tho Hudson
River. Academic Course Primary Class to
Graduation. Upper class for Advanced
Special Students. Music and Art Write
for catalogue and terms.
Us Baau ~ Mss Wka eerd,k As,au NM lssN s. wea,AI
Elmore County Republican. [volume] (Mountain Home, Idaho) 1910-1915, 1911-06-03
f<AII Run Down"

f<AII Run Down.
Describes the condition OF thousands Of
men and women whs need only to purify
and enrich their blood. They feel tired
all the time. Every task, every RESPONSE
bility, has become hard to them, because
they have not strength to do nor power
to endure.
If you are one of these all-run-down peo-
pie or are at all debilitated take
Hoods SarsapariIIa
1t purifes and enriches the blood, and
builds up the whole system.
Get it today in usual liquid form Or
chocolated tablets called Sars atabs.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
FRIDAY, NOV. "a, 1911
MIR. BAYARD READY FOR BATTLE.

I'm THE interview published IN The Evening jour
Il nal Mr. Thomas 7. Bayard, chairman of the
Democratic State Committee, handled the canvass
of Governor Wilson for the Democratic presden-
tial nomination without gloves, and II is evident
that the Governorwill not get the delegates from
this state without stiff fight. Mr.. Bayard echoes
the sentiments of numerous other Democrats who
favor Governor Harmon of Ohio as the candidate
of the party.
On the other hand some Of the leaders will un-
doubtedly favor Governor Wilson. He is the
choice of the progressves of Kent and has the
support of some of the Democratic newspapers in
the lower counties. If the progressives arc to
make the fight, as has been outlined, tor a change
in the rules that there may be direct primaries,
they will have to do so in the state convention.
AS the situation now stands they have little hope
of controlling the state committee. The commit
tee is by a large majority probably in favor OF
Harmon. and will follow the custom Of the past in
calling the conventions at the regular time so
that national delegates will be elected in the regu-
lar way
The Wilson men and other progressives will
have to fight for control of the state convention
r and thus select Wilson delegates if they The
change in the rules will have to be made TO apply
after next year. Ii will be long and tedious
process for the prOgressves to win. and the battle
Of next year will be but a skirmsh.
If the progressives make the fight, as they say
they will it looks as if they would find the oonserv
atives ready TO meet them in battle. The latter
will make appealing arguments. They will
point to the success of JudSon Harmon as Gov
ernor Of Ohio; that he was elected once and then
indorsed; that while Governor of Ohio the Repub-
lican party in his state has been split almost into
fragments. They will say that the triumph OF
Governor Wilson was followed in New Jersey by
the defeat of his party and the loss OF the Legis-
lature. This argument will undoubtedly make
Democrats who want to win stop and think.
Mr.. Bayard has accepted the challenge of the
progresSives, and it looks as if there would be a
hattie royal between the two factions of the Demo
Gratis next year.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24

riages and similar vehicles have been permitted
to travel without lights.
An effort was made to pass similar law for
this state. The bill passed by one branch of
the Legislature but defeated in the other. 1t
should have become a law.
In Massachusetts there is some opposition to the
law. Many users of carriages and wagons fail TO
have lights and the situation so far as automobiles
are concerned is worse than before The motorist
is led to believe that wagons and carriages he may
meet will have lights, but the reverse is true and
accidents still happen.
1t would seem, really that no law should be need
ed to force man TO light up his wagon if he 10
going along much travelled public highway at
night. His own wish for security should prompt
him to go to the very little trouble and expense
of putting lamp on his carriage and
not taking chances. But if persons refuse to pro-
tect themselves, the Legislature should compel
them to do so, and not imperil others by their
own negligence lack of thought or consideration
for the safety Of fellow travellers
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
DRAGGING IN STUDENTS.

A THOUGH most of the big eastern uniyersi-
4 \ ties have natural increase in students, as
large they really desire some of them are adopt
ing business methods in increasing their rollof stu
dent membership. President Murlin, the new
head of the Boston University is asking the trus-
tees for an appropriation to be used in canvassing
the west for the purpose of bringing in $50 new
students to the law department The reason given
for this step is not that the applicants needed
but that the desire is to make the Boston Unver-
siy more broadly representative of the nation, He
wishes TO make his law school a national nstitu-
ton.
The president Of the Boston University is not
alone in reaching after students. The great west
ern universities, some of them have for years con-
Quoted campaign for students, and the corres-
pondence schools carry instruction to those who
arc not in position 10 take the regular course.
Athletic authorities of the universities arc always
on the watch 10 secure students who arc good
athletes Even conservative universities hold ex-
aminations in distant cities so that it may be less
expensive for prospective students TO enter
However the more conservative universities will
doubtless not follow the example of the Boston
University. Where there is a great desire TO in
crease the number of students there is a suspicion
that the course Of study is not very rigid and that
il is easy for the youth TO graduate although this
suspicion may often be unfounded
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
PAYS TO ENFORCE THE LAW.

EROM a pecuniary point of view the fight that
l. the government has been waging against the
smuggers has been profitable District Attorney
Wise Of New York pointed out at a meeting of the
National Jewellers Board of Trade in New York
that the man who successfully defrauds the gov
ernment in smuggling is obtaining an unfair ad-
vantage over his competitors, if he is in business,
because they must pay full duties on the articles
they import
During the last thirty months nearly 200 persons
have been convicted in New York of smuggling.
Some of them have been sent TO prison, and in all
there has been contributed to the government in
the shape of fines, forfeitures and penalties almost
$SOO000O
That the government is more rigid in collecting
duties is shown by the fact that during 1905 the
government collected but $l70 in duties on pre-.
cious stones and jewelry from passengers return
ing from abroad while during the present year so
far S99,905 has been collected from the same
source.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
PUBLIC OWNERSHIP IN ONE TOWN.

IT HE city of Pittston, Pa, is having trouble with
Il the owners of the electric light plant in that
place, and they have started movement for the
erection of a municipal plant The business men
arc spurred on to take this step by the fact that
the company is trying to secure franchise for
nnety-nine years.
New York syndicate wishes to purchase the
plant which is owned by local syndicate OF
Pttston for $55O00O provided the nincty-nine
year franchise is secured. 1t cost the local cap-
tasts $4,000 to build the plant and if they sold
TO the New Workers the sellers would reap a hand
some profit
The borough of Olyphant near Pttston owns
its electric light station. The arc lights cost the
borough $40 year, while Pttston pays 500 year
to the private company, the reduction having been
made from Sos year the rate charged a few
years ago The patrons of the Pittston company
nay ( cents per kilowatt, while in Olyphant with
the municipality owned works the charge is
cents per kilowat.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
Editorial Opinion
SHOP EARLY.

Worcester Mass. Gazette.
Falling on November 80. this year,
Thanksgiving comes about a week lat
er than usual. This will make the adj
vent of Christmas seem all the more
rapid, for but trifle over three weeks
will elapse between the two holidays.
II may seem bit early to urge that
the thoughts of shoppers turn now to-
ward the making of their holiday pur-
chases, but reflection and the expert
ence of other years will make it ap-
parent to all that the time is indeed
short
Early shopping is Of as great ad-
vantage to the shoppers themselves as
to the keepers Of stores and the clerks
employed. As for the. shoppers, early
purchases mean larger and unmussed
stocks of goods to select from in
short, Il means better bargains. For
the clerks II means some relief from
those long and tedious hours which
must be spent during the holiday sea
son working under the high nervous
tension and fret incident to an endea-
vor 10 please everybody in the short
est possible time.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
:: Personal and Pertinent ::

Tho dinner giving season may be said to be in
full cry. with the first the full and then
again upon the cry.-New York Morning Telegraph
What woman understand is how her
husband remember the name Of the President of
the United States and yet not what date her sisters
third child was born on.-New York Press
Better got your holiday shopping done now. for soon
YOU will be busy watching what Congress is up to-
Philadelphia Press
The completion of the Panama Canal a year ahead OF
the specified time will strike the average contractor as
almost violation of professional ehics.-Washington
Star.
Stumbling hassock in a New York church
j. r. Morgan spilled the contents of the collection plate
Seems unnecessary say that none of the cash got
away from him.-Baltimore Evening Sun
Evening journal., 1911-11-24

Some Americans have been accustomed TO think
that imported foods and drugs are purer than our
own, that the regulations in foreign countries are
strict that it is impossible to put adulterated
food and drugs on the market. But the examina
tions by our own government show how mistaken
this notion is, More than 5000 samples of import
ed food and drugs analyzcd at the ports of entry
during the year have been found to be adulterat-
cd. This is one-third of the entire number of
samples examined, and it is high percentage. The
government has been very active in pursuing the
food and drug aduterators and the examination of
the foreign products, with the unpleasant results
shows what a huge task the government has TO
perform.
Evening journal., 1911-11-24
:: With the ParagrapherS ::

He is noble only who i'm word thought and deed
proves himself a man-Anonymous.
.-.-.-.
The mind ought sometimes TO he diverted that il
may return the better to thinking Phoedrus
.-.-.--.
An Euglishman married woman of independent
means and sued for breach Of promise by an old
sweetheart IN court tho defendant was asked TO tell
the extent of his wifes property He did so The
judge then asked Have YOU any occupation now ?"
The defendant replied "As her husband" There was
admission that he living in his vife's house as
country gentleman.
.-f--..
We never reach our ideals. whether of mental or
moral improvement, but the thought of them shows us
our deficiencies, and TO higher and better
thngs.-Tryon Edwards
Baltimore admirers Of Edgar Allan Poe the great
Southern poet buried in that city are raising fund
with which to rear appropriate monument over his
grave simple shaft reared by school children now
marks the scpuchre, told but the literary peo-
PIE Of Baltimore propose to rear more imposing me-
mortal