Arizona republican. [volume] (Phoenix, Ariz.) 1890-1930, 1911-02-19

even III CluD
and they had taken this method of
showing their independence They
utterly disregarded the president of
the club and smugly constituted them
selves a mutual admiration society.
1T is perfectly wonderful how we
do it" (meaning the dinner), says one
1T is amazing that newspapermen
should have so much talent" volun-
teers another, to which a third grave
ly assents: However. we admit it,"
Notable guests had these insurgents
too. Among them were counterfeit
presentments of Carnegie, Tawney
Cannon, Sherman, Beveridge, Fair
banks and Champ Clark Gall of whom
were present in the flesh at the real
guest tables. and these were called
upon i'm turn to briefly address the
diners Each of the little speeches.
was a bit of delicious parody upon
the well-known oratorical styles of
the originals. Carnegie, for instance,
objected to the number of windows
architects placed in his Libraries, as
not affording dead wall space in fifty
seven places for his own name. and
his ambition was ito die poor, but
advertised
Tawney was bitterly opposed to
more battleships and economy was
his watchword. but he stood for pub
lie buildings galore and for the many
creeks that needed deepening.
Fairbanks had never attended a
more joyous dinner. wherefore he felt
called upon to add To the hilarity by
few words 'in tribute to the great
leaders who nestled beneath the messy
tombstones on yOnder hills" He had
mentioned them at the preceding club
dinner, but felt justified i'm recurring
to the subject because they are still
dead
Vice President Sherman's double
told the inevitable anecdote. only in
this case IL was unspeakably aged
and shopworn. which can never be
said of the original article. He would
like to be a newspaper man. Let
me but write the political news OF
the nation and the Old Guard will get
the votes" said he.
Beveridge's representative stood
fearlessly for the uplift." In fact. he
was the uplift himself. He had never
missed an opportunity to make a
speech. and indeed he had made a
great many when there were no OPP
portunities." Champ Clark was fairly
obsessed with his love for Uncle Joe.
but of course that had nothing to do
with the fact that "he will be fussing
around on the floor of the house
when / am up in the speakers chair"
All of the speakers. by a singular
coincidence. expressed their undying
admiration of the Gridiron club. mo
member of which had ever betrayed
their confidence
Though a few days after the Senti-
mental Saints anhnaA. visitation, the
Gridiron club vas resolved that its
Guests shoaI, se~siffer for their
valentines. and the pretty missives
were personally bestowed upon the
favored ones between courses by a
2OO-pound Cupid with diaphanous
wings (and little else), who cruelty
insisted upon proclaiming aloud each
choice bit of sentiment, which gener-
ally was loaded with half-concealed
lest at the expense of the recipients.
Catching up and holding together
the various sldts and adding to the
jollity of the occasion were the topi-
cal songs of the famous Gridiron quar-
tet, replete with sparkling humor. yet
in the sweetest melody.
President Taft was not given the
usual number of turns on the red
hot gridiron. so he had better OPP
portunity to enjoy himself and doubt
less one of the songs especially APP
pealed to his risibilities. II was en-
titled, THE Tariff Whoop," and pic
tured the plight of sturdy Kansas
member of congress who had been
shrieking for tariff reduction. and:
Kicked up such a terrible din
That President Taft suggestively
laughed;
To cut rates he started right in:
He framed a Canadian treaty.
Put farm products on the free list.
But the Kansas insurgent held views
so divergent.
He begged his colleagues to desist.
And the solo in the chorus rang
out:
Great guns. holy smoke. can't Bill
Taft take joker
Carnegie received a special tribute,
being saluted in a coon song. begin
ming:
"A man named Andrew Carnegie
Was busy giving things away;
He thought that he was Santa Claus
And every day was Christmas day
And Uncle Joe. and Roosevelt. and
Champ Clark. and Guggenheim. and
had their roast i'm combi-
nation i'm a Song of Famous Men"
1t is not to be supposed for mo-
ment that the Gridironers did all the
though. The victims of the
grill came back in great style and IL
IS to be regretted that the inviolable
rule of the famous organization which
protects the utterances of the guests
IF the Gridiron club from publication
operates to consign to oblivion some
Df the brightest and wittiest and
sometimes pathetic deliverances Of
the greatest brains of the nation.
ron nolnrnTfn IIrIn