davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-04-12
Duffy's Pure Malt Whiskev


STANDARD OF PURITY AND EXCELLENCE SINCE 1860
has been before the public for the past fifty years, and its merit has
never been questioned. ltis the result of years OF careful work and is
an absolutely pure distilaton of sound, clean grain, thoroughly matted.
The voluntary testimony received from thousands of our grateful pa
tents is proof positive that it is the greatest known remedy for all
throat, lung and stomach troubles. 1t aids digestion, quickens the heart
action, restores health and vgor, makes the old feel young and keeps
the young strong and vigorous. 1t is prescribed by doctors and is
recognized as a family medicine everywhere.
the government s a medicine during the Spanish-American War.
direct, S1OO a large bottle. Our doctors will send you advice free, together
The Duffy Malt Whisky Co, Rochester, N. Y.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-04-12
Ribbons

Black and White Striped
Ribbons, AZ inches wide; various
style stripes; Csc a yard kind;
Thursday and Friday only at &c
Taffeta Ribbons of fine quality
in the most desirable shades; 80
So in. wide, 29c a yard kind at A0C
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-04-12

Fine Tailored Suits of excellent serge or. nov
city weaves for small, medium and large women; fash
ionable short coats, strictly tailored and handsome
ly lined; skirts gored or plated, as you wish; may
$3.50, special priced, while this lot q % zE
lasts, at only PAS.So
French Serge Suits for small, medium and
large women; ~splendidly tailored, but very effective;
coats handsomely lined; skirts gored, with novelty
plated panel; in black and navy only; suits that would
be rightly priced at $3.50 or there ~1-zE
abouts; to be featured Thursday at..... P4 E.fo
Short Coat French Serge Suits; strictly
tailored; coats with notched collars; satin trimmed;
lined with self color; skirts in effective styles; suits
that ought TO bring all of $50; special a : q 90
priced mere at ..................
Fine Panama Dress Skirts; gored or plated
models; with or without plated fare; tailored or but
ton trimmed: full range of sizes, includ- GO 90
ing extra large; value S5.e8: special. 80. Pos0o
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
r n ctlnse VIE.

The hearing-roog Of 1.-THE Frant and
Master streets police station was
crowded with the SPURIOUS me other
morning when a young negro woman
was hailed before Magistrate Scott.
/ what is your nane?9 asked the
magistrate ,s,s
annie Luck, replied the prisoner.
Annie Luck!" repeated1th Judge;
"and what kind OF luck brings you
here?@
bad luck, e said Annie. That's my
huband. Don't know what he done II
for
The magistrate turned to the hus'
band and asked him why he had hat
his wife arrested.
.why for yagrancy," replied the
husband, 1
"Vagrancy?e said the Judge. How
do you make that out? Does she no,
live with you?" 81
eyes" said the husband, "but she
done bust open my door last night"
why" said the Judge, shat Is no
vagrancy; that is hydrophobia:@ u
@That right, Judge" said Luck. Eek
cuse me, I'd forget the right word. n
Philadelphia Times.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

n
4 ERA Act4I yENERl
n. q D 4.

(Cine1nnatt Bnqulter.l \
History records no other century, no
other decade, IN which there were so
many persons actively engaged IN men
tai and physical employ ment as in this
.present era. Never before were the
Virtues so highly regarded, the I'M
selffshness OF classes and masses alike
more pronounced, the humanitarian
ideas SO universal as they. are at this
very hour in every civilized nation
throughout the world. Men who know
thoroughly the few deDraved and fool
ish mobiles Of Europe and who have
dwelt sorrowEully, but too long, as
witnesse of the degraded slums Of
London and the vicious dens OF Paris
are apt to imagine the world is cine
autographed in the vices they have
seen. They should become acquainti
ed with the classes OF morality, that
great body OF people that includes the
Door. the well to do and the wealthy,
and they should know this mighty and
Irresistible power for good that can
land viii master the forces OF evil and
Twill never permit the lapse OF the
world to the conditions Of pagan
lGrece, Rome and Babylon.
The rich OF the United States of to-
lday were the poor OF but yesterday
and the highest testimonial of then
remembrance of their own past strug
leles and their interest in their fellow
linen who are still struggling for sue
sIcess is found in that glorious roll q
4 contributions to, hospitals, missions
industrial homes, sanitariums and 9th
4 er institutions Of a similar character.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
Wees TOWN.

INV ~ fSar canapaign against
= a 5baetHfine to make
.,ss seS,, ~ Tolse and presently the
s,.s MI ..si4 iss +, SSs,bSs avn campaign
s., y ,i,s Seaith And happiness Of
&, r. ~ liza Morgantown Post
~ es' pegt =. 1ybe evidence against the
h rs IA AZ ~ common carrier Of dis
~ e "a j lses A, strong case
*, 49, sa,sf al Ms salriit but the
w ss,ss S,s "A Z enjoyed to nut him
out 81 business haye yielded no very
iarae il - N z ~
< n tlIa life history Of The
ss,;,s s'ficaS ssert that his breed.
: X sss IA 3 siInosf always in heaps
sSis s3fstI HSffssef manure is the
y IL Y ~ 4, tshief KS female fly de.
IN 1ss sess and the insect passes
ss5 feNs DAYS 81 itslaTal stage in the
s.ss s,sgs During this part Of his
w y, nv .fiysbin ii easy to catch, but
III NJ WI ess after him He has not
N cGSSs 4 fty9ai
80 MAMA sot1, ,,aratiyely
any ss.i ~ Il ~ vii :begin early
X, \, III, and take proper
~, e.s s se stSa disbosal Of the
y III sis,SIas within tlle city lin
* s1ll, siS,s oil " oIr house flies
I wv 4. s "a where horses
cols i y ~ NJ NJ aseysnt these stables
~ ,,. - , rRss tSsv must be reg.
ron pFeeusns si,ss ' and frequently
t y ~ Y, st,,asn'nes must be
lsanes s.. sl ~ IA eS Sins The waste
Kerr w t sc !, tSsateJ With chloride OF
& sllp W 9 AlsD 5ps y eassN " -
lime 3,n,,,d,nv for
fiIieetlt ordnance pi ..ahias and
Intelligent care Of morse ss ssAOi tha on
~. 1nsP nsdlnance would pre-
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
MUcH TTlE

9
ohe4hifd, Of Bfitainls estapll opS
orators are Wonlel
/ Ii is said tina are an 9 IT ldote
forlliquor and tobacco
The Austral IAN COVE fnllef oaers
large prizes for the bes lage lump
designs, {,
Hawaii Is thet pineapp e tersIi5pt me
world, The larg pine apple cam cry
ID. the world rs near Honolulu
Many people are 81 opinion that 4 az
flax will become a shiI bullalns port
The naval college IS liealiy located
here.
Statlsticialis now count on tlie SUR
4ival to maturity of 70 out q every
100 male children born IN Etalee M
stead Of 81 a few, year ago
The soda water bill In this country
where ii Hourishes as in no plher "a
all the world was thee shal we say
cool--sum Of $S20000;0O0s
The Canadian pacllic fsail gay Com
pany is reported to have placed orders
for steel rails to- the \ alsie5 81 go "
E000, a large share going the Daallii-
ion Steel Company. OF Nova Scott
An appropriation Of 100 900 70 en-
courage small farmers In the fw ~.
liam islands is covered itl. q bill Intro;
duced in the legislature which csll
RES out some o. the plans % the
board Of Immigration.
1t is proposed 10 Iriantfacttlre pa PER
Iron pulped blue gum timber Tests
have been carried out at English pa pef
mills, and are said Ito give q liolpel
equal to that made from a ftic y e 8;
parto grass. III,
plans Tor the .fe&. reezfii 3 plan 1t
the port Of Pa ela Ia, which iss 10 be-
erected in accordance with q conc e.
4 sion BY the Argentine Cong 70 az
taerican concern, have been pie jared
lahd{work on the building will soon be-
.Fgfn.
"A new source Of rubber suppl p has
lbeen announced To The ie1cA Acl-
ilkiemy ID Sctenaes ina esia toanq N
abundance in the Malay penlnAll laf
land archipelago. II IL eas setl q eis
ed and contains from 70 70 2eBpet feIlt
OF gprfe gum. 4 ~
,l4l The iumbeFd OF ps en- ers ied
on the tramways Of Buenos sree III
I19OS. 1909 and al9lQ ~:
Si712 1892, and 1913, b lse.
", and the receipts were ~ nv y y
ES11,771,294 and $t3S5 46, IA Uni "a
q States currency respectively
After Keller had become head ~
4 the, Lick, Observatory, and died 'tllsE,si
4 and lis ashes were brought nael q
4 Allegheny, for burial u was ne lrleilsl
4 Brashear who scale ID en- % tlleir
i last resting place, q hollow "a tlle mp
porting pillar OF the s0.tneh te ctof.
, which is Keeler's tnetriorial N
50 serious has become tile lalliase
i TO vessel, cargo, wharf pteperty ana
r storage goods through destfpetioa I,y
!, Traits along the river enfban knlent ~
: KIncafdlne; in the Duntermlln consti'
lllar district, that b PROBES Iona fat
E catcher has been employ ~ N lis
trlct committee tosunderta Eegthe exlel'
minatton Of these rodents III IA eet
cd area. The Official rat catcher WI y
his family, has Killed $4,000 Ea j
: one year from incoming vessels lils
ON one occasion they destroy tists q
the rate OF one a minute
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
INTERNATIONAL FAlrH.

New YORK Ir1Dune,l n.
= Mr. Bhlfour did well to vindicate the
good faith OF civilized nations and the
Effectiveness 81 Internat ional compaets
in his address at the London G1tidF
nan. The {aIfit or fepFoach isStoo
often cynically put forward tha6arpis.
.tration treatieS are vain aAas that co|tl-
MENTIONS Of peace are futile, because
no nationwide, in the end, let ITSELF pc
hound bS such an instrument to the
.defriment of what 1t considers to be
its own interests. This indictment OF
International good faith is largely IN
validated by the significant circum-
stance that 1t is made by the oppo
Inents of arbitration as an argument
aaginst he making of the treaties IN
question. But IL the treaties are vain
and ineffective, why should the opPo'
sitinn TO them be so Incorporate? The
very fact that the opponents OF the
principles embodied in these treatles
are so earnest in their disparagement
irresistlbly suggests that they, In tact,
fear The efficiency which they attect
to decry. Ms. :, .
general rule. We do not say that they
lare invariably kept or that they al
ways fully serve the end for which they
Iare designed. Neither do the laws
AGAINST larceny, arson and murder
but no sane man suggests the'aboll
tion of those laws because they are
occasionally broken. Some lndiVla
mas break faith and repudiate pledges
but that is no reason why all mel
should refrain from making promises
and entering into contracts.
THE EXPEDITION OF MoEocco.
washington Post)
French intervention in Morocco IS II
pursuance of the action Of the Alge
1 ciras conference recognizing France
dominant position in that part OF Al
RIGA. Nevertheless, the internationa
situation in Europe may be as Pre-
foundly disturbed now as when ger
many sayagely took issue with M
Delcasse's policy and virtually force
his retirement from the French minis
Itry, Germany's interests in Morocco
4 are wholly commercial She has n
territorial claims upon which to bas
her pretensions Of vital concern IN tn
administration OF Moroccan affairs.
The other signatory powers readil
trust to France to safeguard foreigr
ers whose lives and property may b
/. imueriIed, yet Germany Is not Statistic
/ to do likewise. The Berlin press snitt
danger in the proposition, and this
a sure indication Of what course tn
Il foreign Office will pursue. None to
/. we'll pleased with M. Deacasse's real
/. pearance in the French cabinet an
, the time having neared for the p'
i riodical swat at her old foe, the Moro
n can invasion affords good enoug
/ proyocation for display OF the MALE
h fist, Germany's loneliness with r
spect to the potash negotiations vii
the United States conveys an idea
the Irritation which French persistent
in policing Northern Africa provoke
at Berlin.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06


me moonlight falls ns s9llesl
u OAl0t
The SIMMER DAYS come oitesa
Ia Ohio:
FfendshIp S lIie Strongest
lores light gloNs The IoASest,
And yon aiNass lei the gcunfest
M Ohio.
i.ite burden Besf the lighsest
me home ares burn tlle. bilsn!est
III Chic
isitshens are tlie canes
e IL
Aud, Tie lisfa Ii leanest 4!
isle ;iil line & spFigliest
fs Il q.
gI.e Brs 2es llsh ~
i!nneiy oils lie leaes X!
Naidsia's eyes binest Y
Anu theiF hsatts they are the truess
h In OHIO
red hair is always feddsst
III Ohio.
sflead cats are alwaSs deadest,
X In Ohio;
|The colleges are thiekest, y
Mushrooms grow up quickest
And ff,a 4ets are the sieekest,
In Ohio.
The pumpkins grow the rouhdest,
LII Ohio:
me bankers I'D the scundest.
In ohio:
The game Ii aiways ganlest.
Pie wardens are the lanest.
Ara the hulNiogs are The tamest5
: Iii ohio. 4
The corn grows the tallest,.
III Ohio;
The taxes are the smallest,
In Ohio;
| The counties are dryest, y
The liighba,.s are the highest,
And the policemen are the shyesh
Iii Ohio.
The news is always newest.
In Ohio:
4 Politicians are the fewest.
In Ohio:
The water is the clearest'
4 The wine is never dearest.
\ Yet It often acts the dueerest
In Ohio.
Tie aove-nntes are the saddest
In Ohio:
The streams dance on the s!addest
lii Ohio:
The pocketbooks are the thtckest,
But they empty out the quickest,
!. For the wives they are the slicGest,
In Ohio
-Celtna Daily Standard.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

,rAe sons OF sivA.


ffom TIE Atlantic Monthly
IRIS night al the sirens are sIlents
Al the Hsiltufes asleps
And tile horns 81 tlie lempest are SUE
rjng
Under the deep;
all the sliowsp eiletl
mountains n
Dream pa n sea rs
"A ia down III ii is III tle liver ~
IS calling 70 me
sTiss hight I; an lie ayas Of the spirit
II SliaiSe M n me
And. the Orient ayeii aging Il
NJ It's lances Of lire 4 q
They hear, III lie Iilfiess that covers
The isnd and the sea.
The river In the heart the swaai,
Calling u. ue
,Tis night, but ii snight Of great JOY
anee, ~ ;sss I'M Il
might; Of tinrest-
The night Of the birth 81 the spirit
OF the East and the West;
And the caves and the mountains are
On the loan 6t the sea, Is
For the river inundant is calling,
Calling to Ile @
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
NEM. po,TArogs coMlNe GEE.

4 s9IIE " ~ IL
Car loads Of new potatoes are bst
itfg received. daily in the city THESE
shipments 1come directly from the
southern markets while the otner
green GOODS TO sbe found on the local
markets now are sent mostly from
PftfsburE THE feason for this Is that
with the exception=of potatoes and q
few other articles, II does not justify
i the local produce merchants to5gps
chase goods by the carload, so they
buy from PittsburgJ where goods can can
bsS purchased IN. smaller quantities
and instead of filling a car With one
article the dealer can charter q car
and have consignment OF a variety
Of goods shipped. ~
In The local markets apples STU
remain the top notchers but othesl
goods are at very reasonable pflcIe
and can be had by the economic NV
ing family. Home grown goods, WI y.
be very late this ear4o&ing 3to .th lef
late spring.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
WILL ATTEND
r, w. BREMEN AND CHARLES
WISE WILL REPRESENT LOCAL
KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS.

Messrs. II. w. Bremen and Charles
u. Wise, OF this city, will represent
the local council OF knights of Colum;;
bus in the annual State meeting that
will be held In Huntington on Tuesday
May 9th. &,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
STILL A QUEEN.

Eyes, sir" stoutly insisted the Gin
clnnatl man, Cincinnati is the Queen
City, as she always vast"
"You mean the Queen Dowager city,
don't your" said the clevelander'-
Chicago Tribune. u
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
AMENDED.

"Ycs. ST." .tautiy insisted the Cir
clnnati man. Cincinnati is the Queen
City, as she always was!" ~.
you mean the Queen DowageF Cl'y'
don't your" said he Cleyelander'-
Chicago Tribune.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

The music cries Of tho most musi,
cal Of countries Germany, say that
MIscha Elman is the greatest living
vlolinist.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

FORMER United states Senator viii
liam 3 Mason, OF Illinois, has unex-
t,ectedly blosomed out as thei author
81 4 successful religious book entitled
John title unafratd, which was anony.
niously published a year ago,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
cuRAp HosPlTALITY.

when know a friend is on the Wa
ter wagon l don't urge him to have q
drink"
Neither do l; l invite him to a
wine supper. Nothing like being lay
ish when they're not going to call
you.'-Pittsburg Post.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

on the day that a score Of your best
customers look in vain for your al
and only find that Of your competitor
you may do well to VERY Moderately
hard. 81 y ~ ! Il !. v, Y,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

mrs A. Al: Frost has Sheen raising
sweet peas Iof profit at MarbIehead.
by.the.sea, Mass for the last - years.
She employs ~ girls to help her with
her work and has established q ntn+
Der of new yarfetiesS ~
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
nc aove.nntes are the Eaddegt
IN A DRY STATE

Tourist-"Is II true that no drinking
is permitted on the passenger trains
In this state?"
,fhe depot 'niaster-"It's true" u,
'T6lrist-"WRat time does the neXt
5iteIght train leaTe?"-Plil "a \ Del q; Iihia
,Teleganl. as,s tsisa 5tit
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
WARRANT
jljsTlcE ISSUES WRIT FOR vii,
LIAM. Il. LAKE, CHARGED WITH
LDfiAGY. Y

lunatic warrant was sworn out
;Before Justice E. s. Amos this morn
tng charging William Lake with !un'
4 81. Lake recently returned from
SSyofihg, where he had been several
.lyeirs, A few years ago he is. said 10
fiiye shown signs Of dementia, but
thisf timeh Is condition is very mucn
worse 0tIicers went out to the Lake
lihma to bring him In.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

Bitter lat servants agencyl-Have
you got cook who will go to the coun-
try? :,
Manager calling out to girls In
next room)-Is Their anyone here who
would like to spend a day in the coun'
try?-Life.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
sMEN AND WOMEN.

MISS Enid Yand6I, who has modelled
segeral famous pieces has the honor
81 becoming the fifst woman member
Of the National Sculpture Society.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
FOUND GUILTY
sioE clEMcicH CONVICTED OF De
DINING oPERTY.

Ioe ciemcich, who was charged
ssgftt des tfoying property OF the Con.
solldation Coal Company, was found
Entity todayt I'D the Intermediate Court
bg tRe Jury that trayetsed the case
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
.IisKLRss,.

d can tell g9n how 10, do every
thing advertised tths foftrile taller :,
"Aha!" exclaimed the seeker. rgan
YOU y1s iell me how to boss my Wife,
II can said the weird sister. put
It will do you but, little good. she
won't allow you 10 tryit.i-cleSeland
Leadera eal I. w. "
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

Those who find shopping an annoy
ance are NoT-AD.READERs:
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
An ITN;IpIEAsANT DISCOVERY.

"non't YOU hate to find a worm
when you're eating frult?"
well, not so much as finding hall
a worm! PUCK.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06
INTERNATIONAL ITEMS

Dull.
Few runnors,
The Balkans are quiet.
Abdul Hamld hasn't started any
thing.
Edward VII, Tuesdayed in Marien'
bad last week.
Abyssinia has purchased a second
hand Dreadnought.
Why can't the city newspaper u'il'
ize this style Of Journallsht,as well as
lis rural contemporary?-Pittsbu
Post
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

"l'm quite near neighbor Of yours
now" said Mr.. Bore; I'm living just
across the bay" =,
Indeed" replied Miss Smart. y
home you'll drop in some day,"-The
Housekeeber.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

stephen Bowen, an sO-yearold resi-
aent Of Porters Corner. ~ Y. who had
not missed the first days trout fish.
ing for 50 years, walked mile Monday
to reach his favorite stream and drop
ped dead OF over.exertion 10 minutes
later
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

Z nd learn whether women can write
latf h look over the classifed columns
where a3lot Of their work Is shown,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

willie-What's the most ferocious
animal in the circus, papa?
Pa-The calliope, my son.-Woman's
Home Companion.
"You never had measles at your
' And YOU never had a fit in the
street, did r. Lf0 on Opinion. lsis
Telegrapher-The message must moi
exceed 10 words. I 9 4
Fair Sender can add a postscript,
can't I?-Boston Transcript. 's''S
/ Frigntful-They say she looked dag.
gers at him?"
'jrWorse than that. She looked long
hatpins. Detroit Free Press.
"Plague take that woman!"
.@My friend, she q the2most beauti-
full girl in this town"
I, se,a,ThaE may be, But; She ,obstruots
my view OF second base. "-Plttsburg
Post
Tommy-Pop, what lisa theorist? 4
Tommy,s Pop-A theorist, my son.
is a man who thinks he is learning 70
swim by sitting on the bank and watch.
ing a frog.-Philadelphia Record.
The dentist was a painless one; though
patients loud you'd squall,
He yanked their teeth out merrlly, ana
felt no pain at all.
Bitter lat servants agencyl-Have
you got a cook who will go to the conn-
Manager calling out to girls in
next room)-Is Their anyone here VINO
would like to spend a day in the coun'
try?-Life.
"'m quite near nelghbor Of yours
now" said Mr.. Bore; I'm living just
across the bay" !,
Indeed" replied Miss Smart. y
home you'll drop in some day'"-The
Housekeeber.
Aesop was writing his fables.
"Why don't you get one about II De-
ling cheaper to own your own home
than to pay rent?" sneerd a suburban
lite.
Herewith he saw a lost opportunity
New York Sun.
Old Party-Ah! Playing Londor
Bridge is Failing Down?
Gwendolyn Richdad-oh, no, We're
playing papa's 1O.story building IS De
ing razed to make room for 4V'stor1
skyscraper,-Puck.
Mrs, crawtord-Its an awful job t.
move. ~ !,
Mrs. Crabshaw-But look at the ad
vantages, my dear. I'm never SO hap
py as when I'm picking out new styl'
Of wall paper.-Judge.
Her Gain-Mrs, Jones-Does you
husband remember your wedding an
niyersary?
|; Mrs. smith-No; SO ! remind him Q
lit in January and June, and get tw
J nts.-Harpers Bazaar.
"You appear to be studying yer
hard, my boy" said the kind old mar
ayes sir" said the child.
as 1t a spelling book you have, m
! SNo, sir; it's the baseball guide
D Buffalo Express.
"What YOU ought to do" said tn
sage adviser, us to meet every ma
) ana boy in your community face
0 lGace,,. I.
OF "There's only one way to 40 thet
6lreplied the young man who Is leaT y Z
0 politics. 'I,ll have to set q posltt =,
81 asstfcket talSer AZ the ball grounds +
q washington star:
& ~ subslfibe sof the West tntallsi
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

Catherine Cooper Hopley, a distln-
iguished naturalist, died in london,
While IN the United States at the
time Of the Civil War collecting mate.
rial for her book on American birds
sic was arrested on suspicion of being
a spy.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

Tommy-Pop, what is-a theorist?
Tommy,s Pop-A theorist, my son,
is a man who thinks he is learning TO
swim by sitting on the bank and watch.
ing a rog.-Philadelphia Record.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

snbseribo % the Wei YIrsI0Iail:
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-05-06

The dentist was a painless one; though
patients loud you'd squall,
He yanked their teeth out merrily, ana
felt no pain at all.
Dallas News.