davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
MRS. GoLDE NOT IMPRESSED
Agents Talk of the Efficacy of
Touch" Merely Amused Old
Mans Darling.

Laurence A. Tanner of the Citizens
union, was condemning in Albany GER
tain features of the proposed New
York charter.
81 don't want to see the city in the
power of the BOSSES" he said. u
don't want to see the city placed In
the position of old Gobsa Code.
"Gobsa Code, you know, married In
his old age a beautiful young actress
"a very regrettable thing.
The fair young Mrs. Gobsa Golde
was examining the royal suite in a 30
story. hotel of cream-colored stone one
day, and the hotel manager was point
ing out the suites manifold convent
ences.
"'You touch a button, he said, and
this onyx bath fills automatically. You
touch a button, and the temperature
of each room rises or falls. You touch
a button, and a motor a is at the
door. You touch a button
But Mrs. Gobsa Code, nodding
~mischievously toward her aged hus-
band, said:
"Oh, l have no use for your silly
little buttons. | only need to touch
my husband, and diamond necklaces,
yachts, ropes of pearls-anything
want-appear.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Al infant cuvIer.

Miss Griggs easily induced the
wealthy Mrs. May 70 let her son Fred!
die join the vacation class in natural
history that she was organizing for
children.
I'm sure he'll love It'll" said Mrs.
May, with surprising enthusiasm, And
you will find that he knows a lot about
natural history already"
Indeed! That is very pleasant"
murmured Miss Griggs, vaguely. for
she was not prepared for scientific
attachments in a spoiled boy Of five.
"Yes," said Mrs. May, complacent-
ly, ever since Freddie was a baby
the chef has made all his blanc mango
in the shape of rabbits and squirrels,
and only lately he has begun to make
him m~arsnmallow frogs and chickens
and turtles, and Freddie simply wor-
ships them-you can't get him to
touch anything in a plain mould"
II am sure" concluded Mrs. May,
that you will find Freddie very ad'
vanced for his age."-Youth's Com
panion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Canada at the
Chicago Land Show
WILL MAKE A MAGNIFICENT Elk
HlBTT or GRAINS AND
GRASSES, VEGETABLES
AND FRUIT.

A carload of grain in straw, grasses
and other Of the products of Western
Canada arrived at Chicago the other
day, and is now installed in the
Coliseum, where the United States
land and irrigation exposition is under
way. Those who are interested in
the Back to the land movement" will
find in the Canadian exhibit one Of
the best displays of the agricultural
products of Western Canada that has
ever been made. There are repre-
sentative men there. who will be
pleased to give the fullest information
regarding the country.
The exhibit shows what can be
done on the free grant lands Of that
country and most of the grain was
produced on the farms Of former resi-
dents Of the United States who have
taken advantage of the homestead
lands of Manitoba, Saskatchewan and
Alberta.
The vegetable exhibit will attract
a great deal of attention, and some
marvellous potatoes, carrots, turnips,
cabbage and caulifower are shown.
It is true that the homestead area
Is being rapidly taken up and the
bulk Of that now to be had lies north
of the Saskatchewan river in a por
ton Of the country known as the park
country. Here there is a large guam
tity Of open prairie ~interspersed by
beautiful groves Of poplar and willow
Water is in abundance, hay is plenti
full and consequently fodder for ami
mails is right at hand. Those who
have taken advantage of farming IL
these districts and watched the efforts
of those in the prairie proper fee
that they have the advantage of theil
brother, who is not able to secure fue
and the other conveniences Of tn,
park district on his own farm.
The crop conditions Throughout
Western Canada the past year hav'
been generally good, and some won
derful crop yields, of wheat, oats an,
barley are recorded. The Canada
Government, under whose auspice
the exhibit spoken Of is being made
is preparing reports on crops in tn
different Western Canada districts
and while these will not be ready TO
distribution at the land show CON
mencing on the 18th Of Novembe
and closing on Dec. 9Th, application
made to the Canadian Government
agent nearest you will bring them t
you as soon as they are published.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
pink Of Ponteness.

Frederick Townsend Martin vas be.
ing congratulated by a New York re-
porter on his interesting book.
"And | do hope, sir" the reporter
said, that the eloquent volume will
have an exceedingly large SALE"
You are very polite" said MI. Mar
tin, smiling. I'm your politeness you
remind me of a little American girl.
she was a guest at a house party
In England, and one lovely afternoon,
as we were all taking tea on the ter
race, with the vast facade Of the old
Elizabethan mansion rising up behind
us, and the gardens and lawns and
woodland spreading before US In the
golden afternoon sunlight-our host,
as we sat thus, waved his hand before
him and said:
LAS far as the eye reach, all
this land belongs to me-
Then the little American girl
lisped politely:
"'And | trust, Lord Reginald, you
are not sho~yt-sighted.'
-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

A photographer tells as a joke or
himself that a woman, accompanied
by a little boy. come into his studio
the other day. Il want my pickcher
took" she said. II see that you take
pickchers for four dollars a dozen this
week, SO l come fer mine. And J
want this little boy took in the same
pickers with me-" Yes, madam
but, Of course, we make an extra
charge outside this special rate when
two pictures are taken at once" oh"
says the lady, but I'll keep the boy
In my lap. That's the way / do in the
street cars. and nobody ever says
anything"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
PHYSICIAN ADVISES
CUTlCURA REMEDIES

"Four years ago l had places break
out on my wrist and on my shin which
would itch and burn by spells, and
scratching them would not SEEM to
give any relief. When the trouble first
began, my wrist and shin itched like
poison. I would scratch those places
until they would bleed before l could
get any relief. Afterwards the places
would scale over, and the flesh I'M
derneath would look red and feverish.
Sometimes 1t would begin to itch until
1t would waken me from my sleep,
and l would have to go through the
scratching ordeal again.
Our physician pronounced 1t "dry
eczema" I used an ointment which
the doctor gave me, but it did no good.
Then he advised me to try the Cuti-
cura Remedies. AS this trouble has
been in our family for years, and is
considered hereditary, l felt anxious
to try to head it off. l got the Cuti-
cura Soap, Ointment and Pills, and
they seemed to be just what needed.
"The disease was making great
Roadway on my system until ! got
the Cuticura Remedies which have
cleared my skin Of the great pest.
From the time the eczema healed four
years ago, until now, l have never felt
any of it's pest, and l am thankful to
the Cuticura Soap and Ointment which
certainly cured me. / always s the
Cuticura Soap for toilet, and l hope
other sufferers from skin diseases will
use the Cuticura Soap and Ointment"
(Signed) Irven Hutchinson, Three Riv-
ers, Mich, Mar. 16, 1911. Although
C%uticura Soap and Ointment are sold
by druggists and dealers everywhere,
a sample of each, with S2-page book,
will be mailed free on application to
"Cuticura," Dept. II X. Boston.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Chatting OF BABY
STOPPED INSTANTLY
sorenese and Bleeding quickly CURED.

LH|.
Mrs. ]. F. Deal, Kansas City, Kan,
writes:
q cannot speak too highly Of Resi-
mol. When our baby was rotr months
old she was so fat that she chafed in
the creases of her legs and body. She
was SO sore and inflamed that she
bled, and was fretting and crying al
most constantly. Resinol Ointment
was recommended to US. We had
tried everything that could be thought
Of without success, but Resinol cured
her In a very short time. We consider
1t the best household remedy for irri-
tating skin troubles, and would not
be without it. We are also greatly
pleased with Resinol Soap. 1t is SO de.
lightfully refreshing for the bath"
Resinol Ointment and Resinol Toilet
Soap are high-grade standard prepara-
tions, and their merit and reliabilit-
have won them a place in millions "a
homes. They are for sale at every
drug store on the American cont,
nent and by al, leading chemists in
other countries. Sample sent free II
you will mention Department No. 4s
Resinol Chemical Co., Baltimore, Nd
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Heather Nations Invent Nothing

Bishop Thoburn who has been a
missionary in India for so years, and
knows India better than any other liv-
ing American, says: IF you visit the
patent office at Washington, you will
see 500 improvements on the pillow.
India has not invented one improve
ment on the toothpick in 1000 years.
The nations without God have no in
ventive faculty. They are almost uni
versally the savage, unenlightened ma
lions of the earth"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Mans Many Wan,

How many ways there are In which
our peace may be assailed. besides
actual want! How many comforts do
we stand in need Of. besides meat ana
drink and clothingl Is 1t nothing to
administer to a mind d~iseased"--to
heal a wounded spirit? After all other
difficulties are removed. we still want
some one to bear our infirmities. to
Impart u confidence to. to encourage
US in our hobbies (nay, to get up and
ride behind us). and to like US wit
all our faults.-Hazlitt.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
His Honor unlmpalred.

mo-" said the old shoemaker,
sternly, Il will not do 1t. Never have
l sold anything by Ease representa-
tions, and / will not begin now"
For a moment he was silent, and
the shopman who stood before him
could see that the better nature OF
his employer was fighting strongly
for the right.
NO." said the old mar again, II
will not do 1t. 1t Is an inferior
grade OF shoe, and | will v pass
it off as anything better. So just
mark it "A shoe fit for a queen and
put it in the window. A queen, you
know, does not have to do much
walking"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

lingering the skirt of her shapeless
black dress.
Twelve years ago, when Elizabeth
was 16, she followed the precedent of
all her seven sisters and brothers
and went out to make her living. She
got a place with a drug manufacture
ing firm, and from that time on all
the working hours of the day were
passed there.
Before the Trouble.
1t was an uneventful life. Perhaps
If you had asked Elizabeth then IL
she was happy and satisfied she
that she was.
Two years ago Elizabeth had be-
come what is technically known as a
p~ill-coater. In good times she made
seven dollars a week-in slack sea-
son-well, she made less. 1t is easy
to imagine that munificent sum did
not purchase all the things Elizabeth
would have liked to adorn herself
with to go to Coney Island and the
church fairs and the picnics of the
O'Brien association with her young
man"
But Elizabeth had one glory-be-
sides a nice disposition and a simple,
kindly face-she had a head of beau
tiful, curling auburn hair.
well" said Elizabeth, "one morn.
ing-that morning l mean-the blow.
pipe of the machine kept falling down
on me and l was very impatient
Every time 1t did that it meant that
I had lost time and could coat fewer
pills that day. You see, I got two
cents a thousand, and to make a dol
lar you have to hurry. It fell dowr
again. so | climbed up to- Ak 1t.
was getting down when I felt a lit
tie tug at my head.
1T was my hair, caught in the
shafting. l tried to pull it out. but !
wouldn't come.
II felt myself going up. / scream
ed. I felt a horrible, horrible pain
something tearing--I wal way up II
the air--I couldn't stand jt--that tear
ing.
Then something gave way. 1 fell
didn't know anything more for
time. / couldn't see.
"The doctor came and put some
thing In my arm. It was days ant
days later when l came to in the hos
pital.
1t was sickening to hear 1t. Blu
she had described just what had har
pened. Her scalp had been torn of
and her forehead and her ears. He
eyelids, too, were torn away, and dhl,
a relenting Fate forbore to snatcl
along with them her eyes.
So you can see why she came II
to see me looking as II she expected
a blow. She conccals her scars tn
best she can, but what woman coul
ever venture forth with that terribl
blight across her face and in he
soul?
i Il can't bear to go any place." sh
/ said. people look SO, and | can Sc
! many Of them turn away In DISCUS
i You can't imagine how you feel to b
: a thing like that. And, oh, the chi
dren-that is what / hate and wha
j hurts me most. They stare at me 8
} and the smallest ones are afraid
} me--that's the worst, And I'm Away
afraid some bad little boy, VIII
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
JUST MAKING OUT A CASE
Uncle Jeth Had Deep Reason for oc-
eupatIon That Was Seemingly
Improbable.

John Collier, the secretary of New
York's board of moving picture CEN
sors. said the other day:
It's no good getting up objec-
tionable picture plays. We neyer
pass them. In fact, We turn them
down so invariably that it seems to
me the composers of such plays are
animated by a spirit Of perversity.
They remind me of old Uncle Jethro
Husk.
Uncle Jethro sat fishing on the
bank of a tiny riyulet when a stran-
ger stopped beside him and said:
is 1t possible that there are any
fish In such a small stream as that?'
mo, there amt none Uncle Jeth
grunted.
but you're flshing!'
Yep said Uncle Jeth.
What, then, is your object?
MY object said Uncle Jeth, Is to
show my wife l amt got no time to
sift the ashes.'"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Wanted to Be More Earnest.

Rev. Sylvester Horne, the Liberal
M. P. from London, was talking about
religion at a dinner in New York.
TOO many of us in u religious OBJ
servances," he said, ARE like a little
Totterham Court Road girl.
This little girl said one night to her
new nurse:
"tOh, must l sleep in the dark"
"'Yes, miss the nurse answered.
Then wait a minute said the lit
tie girl, I'll get up and say my pray
ers more carefully"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Homeless Task.

An automobile editor is out In west
ern Kansas making a log" for a
transcontinental road. A curious
farmer asked him what he was doing.
Trying to make a log" replied the
auto editor.
You're up against 1t, stranger" re-
piled the farmer. The Lord tried to
make logs gros In western Kansas.
but gave 1t up long ago"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

DR.. James T. Docking, the president
OF Rust university. once discussed, in
d Fourth OF July address at Holly
Springs, Miss, the treason Of Benedict
Arnold
'Arnold's fault" he said, was as
plainly brought home to him as the
ault OF Fenimore Cooper's friend.
"Fenimore Cooper gave a friend a
copy Of his last work, inscribing on
the ly-leaf the words:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

ITO John Blank. with the authors
affection and esteem.
"A few months later Cooper came
upon this same book at q secondhand
dealers. He bought 1t In and sent II
to his friends again with a second in
scription:
This volume. purchased at a sec
ond-hand shop. is represented to John
Blank with renewed affection and re-
iterated expressions Of esteem"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Adam Rede on Plttsbura.

Pittsburg patriots twisted their
faces awry at a Smoketown pun de-
livered by former Congressman Bede
Of Minnesota.
Bede put it over In the climax of
a sparkling speech at a chamber Of
commerce banquet.
After telling how dearly he loved
old Pittsburg and her fine old peo'
Pile, her rich people and her toilers
he said:
II like Pittsburg, because if l ever
get tired Of the town l can wash II
off,"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Doesn't realize. might laugh or shout

doesn't realize. might laugh Oh shout
at me-"
Her LIES Monotony.
What do you do with your time!"
/ asked.
Nothing. / help with the house
work, but that's soon done. Then
there isn't anything else. / walk
around-from the door in there to
the window-and look out-then back
to the table in the back room, and
then to the window again. There
isn't much to see. There's no use for
me to try to fix up, or make clothes.
I've Just let myself go. What's the
use? I'm in prison. AMIN prison. -"
What do you think about. Eliza
beth?"
Il don't know-most of the time
about my trouble. I cry a great deal
/ am so sad. | live it all over. every
day. What is there for me to think
about? OF thope for? Or plan about?
You don't know how wretched am
Sometimes l cry out. But what's the
use?
Il try to be patient. But what's the
use? What the reward? There isn't
anything in the world for me-"
We sat looking out the window at
the chimneys and the Uttered fire.
escapes and the washings Tapping in
the wind. After a few minutes,
Elizabeth went on.
when I first knew anything in the
hospital, they wouldn't let me see my
self. For weeks before that | was IN
darkness, because of the injury to my
eyes, but when l was in the light
wanted a handglass. They wouldn't
give it to me. My head was all bound
up, but | didn't know.
"The nurse tried to break 1t to me,
but l didn't guess. Finally the day
came when they first unwound the
bandages from my head and saw
what had happened. I thought
couldn't live. The tearing the day II
happened came again, worse, to my
heart. l thought | would kill myself
rather than live a thing like that
But I didn't don't know why"
Keeps Torn Tresses.
Miserable Quasimodo, looking ou'
over Paris from your refuge in Notrt
Dame and watching the dying strug
giles of the only woman who had call
ed you friend-wretched Man WHIT
Laughs" eating your heart out will
your Wolf--unhappy Cyrano, resign
ing your dreams of love-were you
sufferings like this?
We sat there in silence, a few min
utes, then Elizabeth said, "Woult
you like to see my hair?"
Without waiting for my answer
she went over to an old trunk and be
gan taking things out of 1t.
Finally she brought out a shoe box
I cannot explain the feeling Of horro
/ had when | saw 1t. I felt as II
were going to see a dead thing. No
a peaceful, quiet corpse, laid quietl
away, but some strangled creature
whose unhappy ghost refused to b
laid.
Then she opened 1t, and we stoo
looking down at it-a great mass {
curling auburn hair, that had bee
cut from the machines when the acc
dent happened. Some Of 1t wa
} snSrled and broken, but in places
triumphed into the FURNISHED wave
which had once laid SO smooth
!, upon the poor, marred head.
. 1T was pretty, wasn't it?" she sal
putting a gentle, caressing flng'
, lightly upon a curl.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

236 w. Washington
St, Ionia, Mich, a y
II had kidney trouble
SO badly, that for six
months | could only
get around with q
cane or crutches. The
backache grew gradu-
ally worse until l was
compelled to take to
my bed. Willie still
in bed, l began using
Doan's Kidney Pills
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

group of women standing
around the entrance of the New York
fiat building in which she lives laugh
ing and exchanging the neighborhood
gossip or running out to the stores
near by, writes Maude H. Neal in the
New York World.
If you should ask for her of any
of the tenants they will look puzzled
and not be sure than any such person
lives there, although they could tell
you in a second If Mrs. Caseyis hus-
band came in sober the night before
or whether Annie Allen is still keep
ing company with her young man.
Yet 1t is not SO very long ago that
Elizabeth O'Rourke was one of that
same group-a plump, good-natured
Irish girl, giving back as good as
she got" in the banter of the neigh
'borhood as it passed in the early
evening hours. when the streets are
turned into a sort Of promenade for
the young people who have been tied
up in factories and stores all day.
Every morning she issued forth
ibriskly at the anne hour and every
evening she came back, more or less
YEARLY, a well-known, well-liked fig
lure in her little world.
If you recall these facts to the gos
siping crowd at the doorway a fast
of recollection will come across one
lof the faces. and in a low voice she
Twill say:
"Oh, you mean-why. she live!
fourth floor back, on the right"
AS you start to climb upward l
seems to you that you have left
hush in the chattering group behint
Iyou-a strange, significant silence
that you do not understand.
But If the world has forgotten
4 Elizabeth O'Rourke you find her yer.
far away from that came world whei
you have entered her three-room fla
where she lives with her old mothe
and her brother. The chances ar
that you won't see her.
Visitors Not Welcome.
When you have told the cd wcmal
who peers out whom you r seekinI
she bids you wait a moment. Thel
there Is the sound of hurrying step
inside and a door closing before yo'
ARE admitted. Then the mother tell
you that Elizabeth Is not at home.
Hewever, I did see her, because
had called on business. to find GU
what progress her suit for damage
for the loss of her hair had made
knew of her misfortune, SO / wa
prepared to conceal any shock
might feel, and very glad l was tina
Ii had myself in hand when she stoo
before me with a hesitant, fearfl
look in her eyes, like one who Is 81
Ipecting a blow.
1t was easy to see that Elizabet
had been a goodlooking woman. wit
ia soft, almost childish expression o
her face. She is % years old, and 0
account Of her good features her mi,
fortune has left her less repeller
than 1t otherwise would. Her healt
lseemed excellent, so that she is quit
likely to live to be 40 or 80, but sh
iwas very v at first as she 50
N "EHL MaLA FHZA 4NMHM" .N EHXMA
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

For over fifty years Rheumatism, Neu-
ralgia, and other painful ailments have
been cured by Hamlins Wizard Oil. 1t is
a good honest remedy and you will not
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

and gradually improved until we'll"
when Your Back Is Lame, Remem-
berthe Name-DOAN'S." SOC, allstores.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

When one is sad or out of sorts for
any cause whatever, there is no rem
edy so infallible as trying to make
somebody else happy. W. Carney
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Poor conversationaIlst

rs your husband a good after-din-
ner talker?"
mo, indeed. AS Dor as he's had
dinner he lies down on the couch and
falls asleep, andsI never get a word
out Of him"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
Proved.

Orator. thought your paper was
friendly TO me?
Editor-So it is. What's the mat
ter?
Orator. made a speech at the
dinner last night, and you didn't print
a line Of it.
Editor-Well, what further proof do
you want?--London Opinion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23
The Mean Thing.

Stella-Jack was on his Bonded
knees to me last night.
Bella-Well, poor fellow, he can't
help being bowlegged.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

1t is only those who live on low
ground who complain that the world
Is ~overcrowded.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

Don't go with the crowd Just be-
cause 1t is a crowd.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1911-11-23

Tell the dealer you want a Lewis Single
Binder straight Sc cigar.