Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1911-08-17
hphedaowm eHenonCou Thursday

SplldllOn EO SndneI, RenueIIldH WHO
is remembered in the hymn book by that
line "Now | raise my EbeneZer," was
crouching behind Mountz and leiSurely
dipping up water from the spring and
pouring it from the pint-cup into Mountz's S
capacious pockets. The orator had just
begun with his Fellow citizens" when
one of the Aforesaid fellows pushed an
other citizen hard against Mountz and
over he went from his uncertain footing
sprawling into the spring. After short
soak:they fished him out and proceeded
to wiring him dry alike an old dish rag
then set him up in the warm July sun to
bleach out. Upon being asked condol-
ingly if he still felt so wet, he answered
that he never felt drier in his life, inside" !"
II is a pity that the neat and appropriate
speech he would have made cannot be
herein transcribed, alike some other
speeches in Congress that are not made,
but are nevertheless printed for home
consumption. Yet the comic picture of
Eb Shaaer, pouring tinfulls of water in
his sag pocket while he was preparing to
spout, is imprinted on my childish mem-
ory. A child who didn't know of any
other Ebenezer may also be pardoned
for thinking that the line of the we'll
known hymn applied especially TO Ed
Shaner and his being raised up all right.
This shows that hymnmakers should be
careful how they put in old Jewish names
just to get odd rhymes, lest they thereby
corrupt and vitiate the early and ever-re-
membered theologic impressions of the
good little sabbath school boys who sing
the aforesaid hymns.
When this band of heroes had duly fit
the war over, against the Soupkettle and
the punchtub and had thoroughly "clean-
ed them OUT they began TO betake them
selves homeward in very broken shatter-
ed ranks in fact they reeled in promiscu-
ously, many falling by the waySide when
they sank to rest and Snored meath the
bright sky OF those July days. His gray
horse was better pilot than his master
Mountz, so he was not lost in the battle
or the homeward march.
II must be said to his credit, that though
loud he was never abusive or coarse-he
only broke the peace with his tongue
and was never arrested for being too full
alike others who were often placed up
in the miniature stone donjon, that with
its thanking CRATES adorned the city's
western gate, and was called ireverantly
the ''iug'-giving rise to that welIknown
text which should have been painted
across its front in warning red letters,
''iug not that ye be not iugged."
Poor old Mountz, he must be pardoned
for his strong desire TO exercise his voice
and lungs TO inspire the multitude. He
was rather distinguished looking man,
and could he have experienced change
of heart, and have gotten some religion
instead OF WhiSkey inside his skin, he
would have made aSplendid pulpit orator
for those days, when lungs and loudness
took the place of the sword in propagat-
ing the faith. He missed his mission by
very slight turn of the road. He died
in exile from his home, few years after
the civil war and now sleeps in an un-
known grave somewhere hereabout,
where his epitaph might be written that
he contributed generously to the gayety
Of this small part of the nation, and it is
pleasant thought that though frequently
among his joyous and boistrous auditors,
yet the only missive that was ever cast at
him by myself is this little leaflet which is
hereby thrown upon the tablet of his
memory-Peace to his ashes.