Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-12-10
1885, &zzAT,
NJ FCHRISTMAS
~ SHOPPING

to- We try to find the fioorwalker \
tired looking woman is conversing with
him. She is saying that. yes, she did
go up to the fourth floor. turn to the left
until she came to the third aisle, and
ask the salesgirl there if she had any
thing to match that piece Of passemen-
terie. but she hadn't, and so she had gone
to all those pains for nothing. and she'd
like to know what "A foorwalker meant
by sending people all over the earth TO
find things that they didn't have in their
old store, and
Well. anyhow, after long. long while.
We get crack at that foorwalker, who
looks as if he's sort o. sorry that he
hadn't enlisted in the Marine Corps and
gone off strange countries for to see be-
fore he got over the age limit. and he
tells us where that thing is that She's
been limiting about for such a long time.
and go there. and there are 1874. 567
women lined up in front Of that counter
waiting to be waited on. and the three
deli ate looking young women behind that
counter have dark circles under their
eyes, and some of the women are peevish,
and most of EN- whispering to each
other that they're nearly dead and that
their feet hurt 'em so that they can hard
ly walk. and isn't it an outrage that
Christmas comes a Monday this year.
that they won't have a chance to fin
ish up their shopping on the day before
Y.
they've got such a cold in the head that
they can hardly talk, and they've got 2l3
things to get yet, and even then they
know they'll forget a lot of things and
isn't ii horrid when nice people that
you've forgotten to send anything to send
YOU nice gifts. and you've got TO Scram-
BILE downtown on the day after Christmas
and get them something and send il off
with the orful story that you got il all
right before Christmas but didn't get a
chance to mail il on account of spraining
your ankle on the slippery pavement, and
what would be nice thing to get a ratn-
er studious young man that's studying
law. and whose folks live way out in
West Virginia somewhere. and therefore
he hasn't anybody to do for him right
here at home, poor chap, and isn't il get
ting harder every year to think of what
TO get folks, and why don't those girls
wait on people, anyhow. instead of going
right on waiting on other folks that got
to the counter hours and hours after they
did and
Well we get the thing that she's been
limiting about somewhere along toward
dusk. although We have to take our choice
OF only few picked-over things instead
OF sizing UP the whole layout as Wa
would have had the chance to do had We
done our Christmas shopping early, and
then We go TO the phoneroom and phone
up to her that she'd better cancel that
eats number for that evening, since were
doing our Christmas shopping late tobli-
cato OF groans at our end OF the wirel.
anu We lndt We near nef lduSn-
ing softly at her end of the wire, and
then she suggests that she come down
town and meet us and help out with
the Job, since We're not going TO be home
for dinner. and
Yes! Yes! Yesi Do come down! Come
right away. How long will il take you
TO get on your shawl and bonnet? All
right: Come now
That's what We reply to her. Shed have
been down town anyhow if il hadn't been
that she felt she had to get home TO SUI
perintend the dinner.
And We go down TO the car corner to
wait for her to drop off the car. and We
see all the rest of the gloomy male jays
clomping around doing their Christmas
shopping late. and we have sort OF
chirky uplift OF the mind. What IT, when
she drops off the car. shall be able to
unload the hull direful business on her?
She drops off the car finally, after sew
eral years of waiting on our part. We
look her in the eye. She seems Rood-na-
tured. We dig into the jeans and slip
her the bank roll You do it, We say
to her. And she does, And We stink
home, glad. gul-lad,
That's how we do our Christmas shop
ping lately proxy,
CLARENCE l.. CULLEN.