davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
AS A GROUND FOR
DIVORCE.

It is written in the slang of the day
that nobody loves fat man." Unlike
most slang, the statement does not
contain even the germ of a general
truth. The unfailing good humor, the
optimism which finds it good simply to
be alive, endear the fat man and the
fat woman to all who come within
the radius of their smile. The direct
association between good nature and
avoirdupois is strikingly brought out
in a story which comes all the way
from Germany. Incidentally it presents
one more indictment against the hobble
skirt which, in all conscience, had sins
enough to answer for already. A
rotund magistrate was happy with the
wife of his youth, not only in spite of,
but largely because of, the ample
measure of her waist line, the waffle
like abundance of her double chin. The
shafts of adverse fate dulled them
selves against the armor of her unfail-
ing hope.
Then, came that abomination of la
mode, the hobble skirt. The magis-
trate's wife, like the balance of the
world, felt that it was as well to be
out of the world as out of the fashion.
Lacking the willowy form to which the
one-legged pantaloon is peculiarly
adapted, she set about reducing her
weight. By the time she had got
through using all the nostrums on the
market she had at least worried her
self to a shadow of her former pro-
portions, but in the meantime she had
clabbered all the milk of human kind
ness in her soul. As her magistrate
husband put it, "She fouted all re-
monstrances," and moreover, We are
left to infer, failed to provide enough
pumpernickel TO last over Sunday. r.
ritability and unthrift so changed her
that he could no longer live with her,
so he took up the question with an
other magistrate, who promptly granted
him a divorce.
Primarily the moral may be direct
ed to hobble skirts and freak fashions
which have broken up more than one
happy home, but at the same time it is
vindication of the time honored
theory that adipose tissue is closely
related to cheerfulness and hence is
it's own excuse for being.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
SUNDAY OBSERVANCE IN
NATIONAL CAPITAL.

The Presbyterian General Assembly
says We are bad, wicked, naughty
city, and that we need reforming. 1t
says many of our retail stores remain
open on Sunday; that public work,
such as paving, and private construc-
tion, does not halt for the one day of
rest in seven; that Sunday newspapers
are made and sold, and that theaters
and saloons run "in full blast"
The only weakness in this criticism
is that most of it isn't true. Other
wise, it is just. 1t is true that news
papers are made and sold in Washing
ton on Sunday, as they are in every
other city in the country. Just why
the National Capital should be singled
out for criticism on that score, there
fore, is not clear. 1t is also true that
one variety of theater, the moving pic
ture show, operates in the late after
noon and early evening, just as it does
in most other cities. 1t is equally in
explicable, therefore, why Washington
should be condemned for that particu-
lar infraction of Sunday quiet.
1t is not true that retail stores are
kept open on Sunday. 1t is not true
that public work is performed on Sun.
day. 1t is not true that saloons run
"full blast" on Sunday. There prob
ably isn't city IN the country where
there are fewer offenses of this char
acter. ...
Nobody contends that Washington
is an ideal community. We have our
faults, our sins of omission and COM
mission, just as other communities
have. To be singled out and smitten
with blanket indictment, however, is
unfair, especially when the charges
are not founded in fact.
1t would be interesting to know why
the Presbyterian General Assembly, a
magnificent organization of highly in.
telligent people of noble purposes,
selected Washington for Indictment
and refrained from resolving against
New York, Chicago, San Francisco,
Kansas City, and other cities notorious
for violation of both the spirit and the
letter. Of Sunday observance.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
AN INDULGENT SMILE
FOR SUNDAY REFORMERS.

To the Editor of THE TINES:
In one of Sydney Smiths essays that
genial thinker tells the story of Mrs.
Partington's terrific encounter with the
Atlantic ocean. The good old lady re-
joiced in a home a little too near the
rush of its rollers, and, when the tides
were high, she had quite a little trouble
controlling them. Her mop was rather
inadequate. Excellent for a puddle or a
rainfall. but q size or two too small for
the Atlantic. As read the common
sense letter of Justice" in your Satur-
days issue, the remembrance OF that
energetic woman came to me; but, bless
YOU. nv dear Justice" you are as
powerless as Mrs. Darlington II you try
to AFFECT the attitude OF ''reformers"
by any common sense They are proof
sooner you realize 1t the happier you
will be. They have one little window
from which they look at you ana me,
Justice" and when they see US enjoy
ing relaxation and change after
weeks monotonous and combining work,
they get mad, and wave the Johnson
SUNDAY observance bill at u.s. We know
as well as can be It's like Mrs. Parting.
toms mop; that 1t won't do one bit OF
good. So, instead of worrying about 1t.
let's console ourselves like the long
shoreman, who, when his wife beat him.
remarked: IVY not? 1t pleases 'er.
and it don't 'urt me-" The only sad
thing about it Is that such a nice little
band of respectable, exemplary people
should show itself so ignorant of the
truth which history never tires of teach
ing 'reformers"-that, until they have
so worked on a mans own sense Of
right and wrong, so that he abandons
the wrong and pursues the right of his
own FREE WILL they accomplish
NOTHING. If our dear friends had a
Savonarola or Wesley among them,
and cause that was just and human.
they would have. their way IN short or
der. The Charles Manchester wouldn't
be able to pay its coal bill; the street
car companies their conductors; and,
as for those terribly wicked picture
shows, They'd. shut up at once. But, as
IL Is, let dear Mrs. Psrtington trundle
her mop and go for the ocean. II
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
GORDON WILL STILL
WORK FOR THE CLERKS
To III. Editor of THE TINES:

To the Editor of THE TIMES:
Having resigned today the presi-
dency of the Civil Service Improve
ment Association of the Business Men
of the United States, 1 wish to say
in doing so. 1 will continue to push
the campaign with the same Vtgor as
in the past and will return to my
original idea as inaugurated at my
Convention Hall mass meeting IN
February. to work for the reforma-
ton of civil service as an independ-
emit citizen, Independent in politics,
independent of the Administration, IN
fact. without restraint, except the un-
aduIterated truth as my guide, whlcn
/ will use without fear or FAVOR, IN
securing for the 100000 Government
employees their share of increased pay,
as has been given all other employees
of the Government, except those IN
the civil service. Also the establish
ment Of a court of appeals. assuring
fair play in promotions. demotions'
and removals. A retirement FUND, al
so the same right to the clerk that
every other citizen has to petition
oohsfeSS FULTON r. GORDON.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22

The street cars offered them the most
likely relief, but on every line clouds
of dust followed every car, overtaking
it every time it stopped, and filing the
noses and Threats of its occupants
Furthermore, whenever two cars pass.
ed, a shower of dust filtered through
each.
Two of the most popular lines for
summer riders are the Chevy
Chase and the Brightwood avenue,
On either side of the car tracks
on these lines the District keeps
the road oiled. The broad stretch &C.
cupied by the double tracks, however,
is dry as finder. The ballast of the
roadbed makes a dust of finely pow
dered rock, which is intensely irritat-
ing to the membrane of the throat and
nose. Not only is it unpleasant, it
is actually injurious.
In many cities the street railway
companies are required to sprinkle or
oil that part of the street occupied by
their tracks. Why should they not
be required to do it here? Of what
particular advantage is it for the pub
lie to keep down the dust on each side
of the car tracks and allow it to be
stirred up by every passing car in the
center?
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
UNWILLING OF THE L'ENFANT
., ,. MEMORIAL. Co.. ~.

The unwilling of the memorial to
the memory of Major Pierre Charles
L'Enfant in Arlington Cemetery this
afternoon will be a tardy but fitting
recognition of the work of the man
to whom we are indebted for the
beauty of the Capital City. 1t was
he who, under the direction of George
Washington, drew the plans, looking
with the eye of genius to the time
when we would be the magnificent city
we are today.
He was one of the sincere friends
whom France gave to this country in
the time of our great crisis, and bis
work in peace and war is entitled to
the highest praise. 1t is right and
proper that at his grave should as
semble the President of the United
States, the ambassador from the
French republic, and a large concourse
of other distinguished citizens. In life
his reward was meager. He had but
too great reason to feel that the in
gratitude of republics was confirmed
in his case. He passed away with his
fortunes at the lowest ebb, too proud
to accept the grudging recompense Of
fered him, and for years lay in an I'M
marked grave.
Today he comes into his own. The
people of Washington should assemble
at Arlington to pay him their tribute
of gratitude.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
Sulzer Calls Fiddling
Finest Art in World

Representative William Sulzer, Of New
York, today stands as the supreme ad-
vocate of the gentle art of fiddling.
I'D rather be able to play the fiddle
than to possess almost any other ac-
compiishment in the world" is Suffers
praise of the fiddle. made yesterday at
the Y. NJ. c. A. mems meeting.
There's more poetry, more inspira-
ton, more comedy, more drama and
more tragedy in the tone of a fiddle
than in any other instrument" contin-
ued Mr.. Sulzer. advising young men to
spend two hours daily in study to
make themselves experts In some line
of endeavor.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
HONEST BEES PAY
FOR CIDER SPREE
WITH REAL HONEY
They Go on ''Tear" at Far
mer's Expense, But Later
Reimburse Him.

HILTON, N. Y, May 22-Residents
of this community today are busily
scanning THE Life Of the Bee" to see
whether Maeterlink has recorded the
propensities Of the insects for getting
themselves into that state which is va
riously described as "stewed." 'soused,"
picked" 'petrified," saturated"
Spilled" or "ossifed." AS yet, no one
has found anything in the annals Of
the Maeterlink work to indicate the
fact, but the residents have 1t on the
word of John Haynes that the average
bee simply can't keep away from the
stuff"
Haynes tells 1t to the credit of the
bees, who, he says, have improved up
on certain citizens Of this country, in
that they pay for everything they take.
Mr.. Haynes saw six bees crawling
on the floor Of the furnace room
in his residence. Their wings were
still intact, but they seemed unable to
fly and their hum was a thick and I'M
steady sort of murfnur. Moreover, their
attempts to walk reminded him Of a
salesman cutting of IS cents worth Of
velveteen on the bias, and a sort of
mild establishment enthroned itself up
room, and finally spied two more bees
crawling out OF the bunghole Of a near
ly empty cider barrel. He knocked in
the head of the barrel and found Il
lined with bees. There was about half
an inch of cider at the bottom Of the
barrel, and the insects were the thick
est at the edge of this. All seemed to
be paralyzed, the paralysis having
seized each one and set him in the man.
ner one must needs be curved to be
placed in proximity to a brass rail.
Each had one forefoot hooked into the
air, even as the arm of a man who
says, well, here's a hand across"
Mr.. Haynes jumped back, as might
most persons who suddenly find them
selves confronted by 467, 1882 bees, but
they made no move to follow him. He
lowered about the cask until he was
convinced that every insect in the lot
was, figuratively speaking, under the
table" Even the queen was lying in
a stupor at the speakers table, and
her cup bearers were leaning against
the wall in the style of the bacchanals
at one Of the feasts OF Philips war
like son.
Mr. Haynes took the barrel out into
the garden, and left the jewellers to
in the sun When he returned. three
hours later, he found that they had
swarmed on the branch of a pear tree
just above, leaving in the barrel 150
pounds of honey in payment Of the
check. Mr.. Haynes announces that II
any one who doubts the exactness OF
the narrative will call at his home he
will show him or her the identical pear
tree.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
NO PEACE WHILE
RACE HATE LASTS,
DECLARES RABBI
Tells Why He Declines to
Participate in Lake Mo-
honk Conference.

NEW YORK. May 22.-Dr. Stephen s.
Wise told his Free Synagogue congrega-
ton in Carnegie Hall why he declined
an invitation to take part in the Inter-
national Peace Conference this week at
Lake Mohonk. The host Of the occa-
sion, who owns the hotel at the resort,
bars his doors to Jews In the summer
season. On that account DR.. Wise will
not accept his hospitality in the spring.
He thinks no self-respecting Jew should
do 1t, and that the Christians will also
decline when the real peace spirit pos
sesses them. ....
1T have sent my message to my fellow
Jews and the peace conference as fol-
lows:
ct is vain to hope for cessation of
war as long as men suffer racial an
tipathies to go unchalienged. War, after
all, is not thing of arms and armies
War Is a thing Of human hearts, and
arms merely execute the purposes of
the souls of men. II we can get slaugh-
ter out of the hearts Of men, war Will
speedily cease
illustrates High Purpose.
Every reason which could be urged
in defense of the host of the Peace
Conference is equally valid IN the ex-
tenuation of the crime of war. Such
anti-Jewish inhospitality is popular and
widespread, so is war. 1t Is profitable,
so is war. In SO far as the Peace Con-
ference meets in a place participant in
a vulgar and goddess discrimination
against a whole people II illustrates its
own high purposes and in a very real
sense comes to bring not peace but the
sword.
IF the members Of the conference
were simply money-making hotel peo-
pie, the matter would be wholly negli-
gible. But at that meeting the leaders
and inspirers of the thought Of the ma
what boots international peace so
long as interracial bitterness and ami
mosities are uEconquered? Even II war
should cease this day. even II the
prophecy of the Hebrew seer be full
filled. that swords be beaten into plow-
shares and spears into pruning hooks,
still were there war upon earth so long
as peace be not rooted in good will and
comfy and fraternity.
War Between Sects.
Land hunger and. territorial greed are
HUI dS Idi BcI9 IcSpohoioic Aoi "ai no thc
racial and religious and national hostil-
ity of which anti-SemitIsm is a most
persistent and Christless example. They
have no right to feign to be makers of
peace between nations who in very truth
are war perpetrators between faiths and
sects.
1T Is honoring to be shut out OF some
Fifth avenue clubs, the qualifications for
admission being a capacity for unlimited
idleneSs and for almost unlimited meas
ure of strong drink. But 1t IL another
thing everywhere throughout the land
to xclude the sons OF Israel from the
nominally democratic fellowship of the
academic atmosphere. And the dishonor
Is in no part that OF Israel"
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
AS TO THE RECALL OF THE
JUDICIARY.

Precisely at what point the creature
which is the judiciary-becomes
greater and superior to the creator
which is the celebrates a question
which demands consideration in con-
nection with this discussion of the
recall for judges.
Widespread sentiment is growing in
favor of the recall of legislative and
executive officers. There is less sen
timent in favor of the recall of judges,
Some of the men who have taken
strong ground in favor of the recall as
applied to other positions, oppose or
express misgivings about its applica-
ton to judges. They urge especially
that such a program would tend to
break down that reverence in which
as a people-indeed, as a race-we
have come to hold our judiciary system
and its DEGREES.
Most judges in this country are
elected by the people. 1t seems fair
to assume that if the people are COM
petent to elect a mayor, and to ex-
ercise, as to him, the power of recall /;
and if they are competent to elect a
judge, then as to the judge they
ought to be similarly capable of de-
termining a recall proposal
The judiciary, it must be said, has
itself been providing of late some
powerful arguments in favor of CIV
ing the people the right of recall.
The other day a Cook county judge
made a ruling that ended the effort
of the Illinois senate committee to
conclude its investigation of the Lori
mer election. The court held that the
committee had no power to COM
mandeer into its presence certain
records of banking transactions which
were esteemed of the utmost import
ance to establish the truth or falsity
of charges that a great corruption
fund had been raised and spent to elect
Lorimer The decision is widely de-
nounced by lawers as an extreme and
unjustifable employment of techni-
cality.
Judge Dickson of the common pleas
court in Cincinnati has not only quash-
ed perjury indictment against Boss
George B. Cox, but has found that he
has been in technical jeopardy and
therefore may not be again charged
with that offense. This decision like
wise is surrounded by circumstances
calculated to arouse wonder whether
any action which the people, if equip
ped with the power of the recall, might
take would be dangerously subversive
of a proper independence of the
Judiciary. 49,.
The eagerness of California court
to save Abraham Reuf from paying
the penalty of his crimes is another
case in point.
There are certainly some samples of
the ermine which might well be dis
infected before undue outcry is raised
about the. proposal to interfere with
judicial independence. What we need
is more, not less, judicial independence
of political bosses.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
Iron Mine Millionaire
WEEDS Girl Book Seller

MILWAUKEE,, Wis, May 22.-George
L. Lonstorf, the Milwaukee Iron Mining
millionaire, has been married in Chi
cago. 1t was learned today, to Miss
Amelia McGGarry, a saleswoman in the
book department of a local store, with
whom he has long been acquainted.
Members of his family at first denied
knowledge of the wedding, but later ad-
mitted that the ceremony took place
with none of the members of either
family present.
Mr.. Lonstorf is the son Of Mrs Mar
garet Lonstorf. chief owner OF section
80. iron property in Minnesota, worth
$50 100000. and many other mines Of less
value. Her son, who is over forty years
of age, Is manager of her properties.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22

tries hand being even more clearly dis
cernible In the domination of both DOW
reproducing and power-using corpora
lions.
colorado presents striking example
OF the rapid consolidation of water DOW
er control In the same interest.
In the South, especially In the Caro-
linas, the same consolidation is going
on rapidly. The great water power re.
gions are New England. which is fast
being brought under subsection by the
trust interests: the Southern AppaIa-
chan States: New York: the Pacific
coast. and the Rocky mountain courl-
try: In all these regions the trust has
ready 1t Is In substantial domination.
Centralizing Control.
In working out the plans of the COM
biration, the most marvellous co-opera-
ton Of different departments is OBJ
served. The banking and financial af-
Citations enable the combination to
handle securities of public service cor
porations. to which the manufacturing
department sells all kinds of equipment,
and the power department supplies pow
er. The tendency Is toward centralized
control. under this great combination, OF
street railway, gas. electric light, and
power concerns. These companies, in
large part. paw for supplies in their Sc
curlties. which through the banking af-
fillations Of the combination thus enjoy
great advantage over competitors. In
getting marketed.
Tracing out the relationship Of fifty
three directors and officers in the Gen.
eral Electric and its subsidiaries, IL
their places in the boards of public SER
vice and power companies, a graphic
view Is given Of the huge and rapidly
growing power of this group; a power
which it is alleged. is fast making 1t i'm
possible for rivals to finance or develop
enterprises OF the sort in which the
combine Is interested.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22
Wellesley Girls Prove
Easy Prey for Cupid

WELLESLEY, Mass, May 22.-The
agitation of women's rights and the
necessity of a feminine ballot has, as
its sequel, the largest number of en-
gagements ever announced by any grad
uation class in Wellesley's history.
Fifteen Of the graduates are display
ing engagement rings. Yesterday the
college had a visit from Baron DIES
tournelles De Constant, ard a produc-
zion of Greek play out of doors was
given in his honor. the junior class
play was held in the barn, and the an
nouncement of the new officers of
the "Barnswallows'' was made.
The Washington times., 1911-05-22


column.
Doctorate disputation, George Washing
ton University, p. m.
Unwilling Of the HEnfant Memorial, Ar
lington National Cemetery, p. m.
Meeting Of the Southern Society, Con-
federate Memorial Hall, 1922 Vermont
avenue northwest, p. m.
Meeting Of the North Capitol and Eek
ington Citizens Association. st. Mar
tins Hall, North Capitol and T
The following Masonic organizations
win meet tonight: Lodges-Dawson,
No. Is, F. c.; Arminius. No. Is, E. A.
Royal Arch Chapter-Mount Vernon,
No. 3. p. F. and NJ. E. M. Scottish
Rite-Mithras Lodge Of Perfection,
fifth and sixth degrees, 8 p. m; dinner
in banquet hall, p. M; fourteenth
degree, s p. m. Eastern Star-Board Of
Managers, Masonic and Eastern Star
Home, Masonic Temple, 7:30 p. m.
The following /. o. o. F. organizations
will meet tonight: Lodges-Beacon,
No. Is; Excelsior, No. II; Langdon,
No. 26t Covenant, No. Il, and Union,
No. II, regular business. Rebekah
Regree-Esther, No. 5, degree work.
The following Knights of Pythias lodges
will meet tonight: Decatur, No. g.;
Calantha, No. II, and Equal, No. IL,
regular business.