Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1911-03-30
WHAT EVERY PAGE KNOWS.
Messengers of the Senate Could Dis
close Some Interesting information.

| messengers OF the Senate Could Dis
close Some Interesting information.
Some person, speaking from the bot
tom of the well of truth, has said that
no man is a hero To his valet. The
| philosophy of the observation might
| have been greatly strengthening il the
sage had thought to add that no
| United States Senator is any great
| shakes 70 4 Senate page.
| II the folks at home knew their Sen
| ators half as we'll ITS the pages in the
Senat" know them there would be spe-
| cial elections ordered in quite a num-
Der OF our fair states. Also if these
| same pages could be permitted to die
| tate few thoughts for the Congress
| sional Record, setting forth their per
| sonal views about their employers the
| circulation of that staid old sheet
| would be doubled almost Immediately
| There IS a popular impression that
| the Senate pages are studiouS youths
| with bullying foreheads. learned in the
| constitution and deep in the mystic
| ries of Senate procedents. They are
| supposed to converse exclusively in
1 parliamentary and senatorial lansu-
| age. even when ngaged in the youth
full rastime of matching pennies in the
| cioakroom. These ideas probably are
| erroneous. Intimate association with
| Senator's does not necessarily tend to
| elevate. Persons have been known to
| sit right across the table from a
| United States Senator all night and
not hear anything more constitutional
mentioned than the fundamental law
| that three of kind beat two pair.
| While Ii is perfectly true that this is
good law, besides being useful infor-
| nation, 1t could be acquired without
| going to United States Senator, and
| probably much more cheaply.
These wrong impressions about the
| high constitutional atmosphere that
| surrounds Senate page come natu-
| rally enough from the superficial OBJ
| servation of visitors in the gallery.
| Looking down from there il is easy to
| suppose that when Senator claps his
| hands and a page hurries noiselessiy to
his side and inclines 4 respectful ear
| that the fortunate youth is receiving
| information of the highest import.
| Doubtless lie will write it down in his
| private diary before he sleeps that
| night. and in later years will publish
IL in his memoirs where eager millions
| will read it. Also doubtless he won't.
for the chances are the distinguished
| Senator merely requested the page 10
| tell that bothersome constituent who
| has been waiting out in the marble
room for the last hour, to wait anoth-
| er hour. by which time the distin-
| guished Senator will have slipped out
| another door and gone TO lunch.
| Mark, too, how another distinguished
Senator is writing something out with
great care while the page stands by to
| receive the message. Its importance
| must be great. for see how the Senator
reads it over to the lad pointing out
each word with his pencil The page
mods intellgcntly. folds the note care
| fully and speeds away. Doubtless he
will return presently with his arms full
of learned books and the Senator viii
make a speech that will echo down
the corridors of time for as much as
week. But if the watcher in the gal
lery could follow the winged page on
his errand it would not be to the Con-
gressional Library. but to the Senate
restaurant in the basement of the
Capitol. And if he could look over
the chefs shoulder and read the note
tinguished Senator is mighty particu-
lar about the way his chops shall be
broiled. Yesterday, it seems, they
were not 10 the Senator's liking, and
the chef will take notice that if he
falls down that way again he will
hear from the Committee on Rules.
which runs the Senate restaurant and
pays the chefs salary.
| hA cI,n
notion to disclose the secrets of his
prison house he could a tale unfold
that would make.s1he undertaking
maya zines look likS4periodicals sub
sidized by Wall Street. He could tell
exactly whatfthat whispered message
was that paAsed between leader on
one side of the aisle toe leader on the
other side at critical moment during
rcllcall. He could tell what went on
out in the cloakroom when :, deal was
on to trade one little bill for another
little bill, and incidentally to break a
part pledge and sell out party meas
ure. Even the familiar designations
by which pages know their masters
would make mighty good copy One
Senator somewhat known for his
querulousness invariably is referred to
by the fraternity as Grandma" which
is hardly parliamentary even in the
clCakroCm.
1t would be Interesting to know what
becomes of Senate pages when they
outgrow the Job. They have been
known to become Senators. but that is
4 rare. There must, of course be thou
sands of eX-pages who now are doc
tors and lawyers ard merchants. and
other things. Probably a close OBJ