El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-06-19


If woman had a growth Of hair
on her face, would Dr. Shaver?
If anyone asked DR.. Ira what allied
his patient, would he tell the truth or
beat around the Bush?
Do the saloons on FL Paso street that
have their back doors open and the
bar rooms crowded with drinking men
all day Sundays, make some of the city
officers fit subjects for an oculist?
NJ. ]. Preston sends this, with the in
junction not to let the editor go daffy-
dill he reads It:
There's river that passes Ell Paso.
From the pass above it passes down.
some water
AS it passes old FL Paso town.
Maybe Ell Paso's the passes,
Or the passes owe Ell Paso some;
But how much does Ell Paso the river
that
Passes Ell Paso, that the passes let
pass so
It may pass down and pass FL Paso?
You may pass past many passes, as
you pass past. but to pass past FL Paso
the Pass would be to pass past the best
passes Of all passes.
In other words
The best pass passing passengers pass
Past all passes passers pass past is Ell
Paso.
Miss c. E. Romero, 1913 California
street, is author OF these:
When a preacher can't sleep can
layman?
If dog can tree one 'possum. how
many can an umbrella tree?
If a horse can gallop ten miles per
hour how fast can a cantaloupe?
If the sting bee" sharp, must the fly
flea?
If a fowl can duck, can the corn
dodger?
If a hospital has such patience,
why does it nurse its injuries?
If fountain pen. can Ramon Corral?
If an Ingersol can keep good time,
why not dog-watch?
While the chambermaids talk, will
the bed tick2
According to the latest baseball rules
is not the water pitcher?
When the storms rage, do they mock
turtle? No, but the window.
If compasses point north, where
will pencil point?
No men who Havana" Judgment,
will throw a Key West while the Yeast
foam.
If the cook is clumsy. should the
dish saucer2
Glenn A. Cheesman sends another lot.
Here they are:
When Viola Allen saw THE Twelfth
Night" did SHAKESPEARE?
If E. H. Sothern had "A Midsummer's
Night Dream" would Hamlet Julius
Caesar Mark Antony?
If Knightho God was in Flower, would
manhood bloom?
If the snow came and we heard "a
Winters Tale" would Harry Thaw?
If Edgar Allen Poe had q Stately
Raven why did Goldsmith have a
deserted village?"
If Victor Hugo stood where Jean
Val Jean sat. where did Cossitt?
If the wagon spoke. would the wheel
turn?
If the haircuts. does the muttonchop?
If flower smells, does copper cent?
If Niagara Falls. where will Port
land?
II the breezes sang. would Neptune?
If the political ring played a game
would it be Kelly Pool?
When the tables were turned did the
bellhop?
When New York is theater crazy,
does Geo. AIDE?
If the frogs crosked in Cape Horn.
would Puget sound?
If Charlie Bassett roped AZ steers in
80 seconds. would Violet Heilethrope?
When Gen Grant marched to Rich
mon. where did Chickamauga?
If the situation took on new form.
would the rubber pad?
If the pine trees pine
And the dogwoods bark,
While the willows WeeO
Now why don't the ocean wave2
The winter came and the snow fell,
The water froze and the pipes bursted,
Now, why did the frostbite?
If Dan Patch made a good record
can DR.. Race?
If Mason Pollard sheared Sc sheep.
How many could Darbyshire?
They say that yeast will rise, but
Sozodont
If the sugar beets. can the peach
skin?
If Abe Reuff made his money in
Frisco, did the people in Reno?
If the Roosevelt dam is like the Ele-
plant Butte. will it make the Rio
Grande?
When Cleopatra loved Marc Antony.
did Nero have julius Caesar?
If A. L. Hawley has cage in the
E. P & S. W. building. why doesn't
HAWKS get the blTQ III the u H. SdIu
If you saw the horsefly, did you see
the cowhide?
If A. Conan Doyle read THE Scar
let Letter" what did Opie Reed?
You said the Kettle boils, but does
the pot roast?
If China took Miss France, would
Japan Russia?
If Art Woods grabbed the Cactus,
what did Joseph Kopf? The Gem.
eff king Lear" saw King John"
in a Midsummer Nights Dream"
would Hamlet Tolstoi's ghosts to come
for "The Twelfth Night" for 1.-The
Merchant of Venice?"
If Jake Wolff is Beaver, is John
Doe an Elk?
C. NJ. Newman asks:
If an auto gets weary. must It be re-
tired?
This is signed Little Jack Horner."
postoffice box 1855:
If the ticket agents were more civil
to the public, could that be called civil
service?
Mason Goebel. 724 Federal street, age
r. sends these: