davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
wises U. Up ON Nomenclature

Wises Us Up ON Nomenclature
Nav, NV course me hair aint red!
Yu don't hav' tn hav' red hair tn be
called Reddy, du yu? It's jes me front
name chopped in haf wild uh cuple Wv
ledders added. an'-well, l wuddent
swop Reddy fur uh-nudder name, on
uh-count Wv de way it cum.
1t wus when l lives in Pearl court
dat 1 got ct. De gang uster call me
Stew" on uh-cOunt Nv me middle
name bein' Stuart. We wus playin'
tag on de. back fences wun day, when
Hogan Che was the leader), bein' 1T, -
chases me. 1 gives him uh good run,
an he gifts me cornered.
/ tries tn jump tn unnudder fence,
loses me footin' an falls.
When ! wakes 1 wus in de horspi-
tai Me head was all dun up wild
white rags, me hands wus clean an
de beds wus jest es white es snow.
Dere wus lots NV udders round me, too.
Wun mornIn' uh little gurl wiv her
mudder Gums tn de room. Dey goes tn
all de udder fellers beds, den Gums tu
mine. "O-o-oh," sez de little gurl,
"''es dot his head hurted. Use awT-
full sorry oo's dot oor head hurted,
she sez tu me; tell me how 90 dot It
hurted?"
could think, an she sits dere holdin'
me han an takin' ct all in. She
wus all dressed in white, wild two
ribbons uh hangin' from hur cap. Hur
hair wus long an curly an shined jes'
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

Say. kid. I'm sometimes sorry that
1 didn't fall for the wiles of the boss
daughter.
She's got freckles, and is bit or
the Clydesdale type and all that, but
a fellow could forget all that il he
could tie up with the right kind of a
father-in-law.
When Maude married that half
baked dentist just out of college, !
thought 1 saw where she was going
70 miss a lot of the comforts of home.
But shucks! He's worked up the
biggest practice in the neighborhood,
and they do tell me that he is getting
SO proficient that he can pull milk
teeth with both hands.
OF course, there's a reason. / have
my orders from headquarters. Here:
take this piece of rock candy home
and give II to your kid brother
There's nothing like making two
aches grow where only one throbbed
before.
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

HERE'S Jackie" asked Mrs. Pceved. nervousy, lay
ing down her embroidery and going tosglance out
into the hall. Hes very quiet"
"Aw, quit your fussing" said Mr.. Peeved, TAX
ing his cigar out of his mouth as he spoke. Il sent
him down cellar to chop some kindln'. Della and
that blamed furnace fire always seem to go out on
the same night and ! had to have some wood:
"Mcrcy!' cried Mrs. Peeved, 'he oughtn't to
be down there alone He-he might chop his foot
or something I'll go down."
Sit down and forget it," snapped Mr. Peeved.
nnhndr's He CHI
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
Re ddy Smith

roses an when she looked ct yu out
Wv hur big blue eyes. why WI cuddn't
help but like hur. Jimmie
My names Elsie" she sez. when 1
stopped talkin', what's oors?"
'Redman," sez l. "Redman?" sez she,
questlonen like. Tan tall oo-jes
Reddy?" Sure sez /, call me
anything you likes She smooths me
forehead uh-minute. den sez, Il like
co." An she stoops an kisses me on
de cheek, den runs uh-way. I ain {
seen hur since. Jimmie, but-say.
Reddy amt so bad, after all, dyu
think so?'
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
Drawn for The Washington Times.

ment, when he lands you into the
car in all your carriage f1nery.
Every time the workman next
you moves. he has a chill lest your
evening coat be soiled. He knows
what the other men are thinking of
him for putting you and the coat
in such a position.
You make more fuss about keep
ing your dress from touching the
steps as you get off the car than it
would take to protect the coro-
nation robes. Your rubbers keep
sliding off of your high-heeled slip
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

late Con- get OFF o there!
he hears what they they pretend
and then when have pulled they
your bell beve hucksters is the lot of earth
That's what | b1ieve
Say fellow, you gon off o there? You've been
draggn this for three and pce
you're gon what's you. Oh you
right, you-you-you-HEY! ARE YOU COIN TO GET OFF
O. THERE?
What do think I've been ringn this bell for
oafer? Hah! do you? (Look i'm ookn Look
at i'm looknD Yes that's what ignorant 1oae Yan
fit with decent people You're and you step
down off that Ill punch you're head
Oh did you hear what he called me? that
called boobl If hadn't "a heard wouldn't a beved
After aski him and requestn him nice know how
off the tracks he around and calls boob You heard
didn't you?
Say, feler Pm through trean like gentleman.
don't whether I'm goin hand
that pceman the against
morning and see that get the limit
Hey oierhcre he whippn his old down the
know didn't him draggn but what's the
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
Hopeful Scribe

winks-I hear that some OF the
prominent actresses, singers. generals
and society ladies get five hundreo
dollars for merely signing their names
to articles written for them ana
printed in the UpperSrust MaSazlneE
Jinks-It's true. too.
winks-WelI! Well! 1 wonder what
they'd get If they wrote the whole
article themselves?
Jinks-Get laughed At
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

The lady anarchist carefully wrapped
up her summer supply Of bombs in
cotton batting, placed them carefully in
her trunk, and battened down the
matches.
Then with ease and aplomb and
things like that she sent for baggage
man.
He came to get the trunk, and found
it on the top floor of a six-story house.
He carried It down and placed it in his
wagon.
She didn't tip him, which was ex-
ceedingly vexatious.
When he arrived at the depot he told
his good friend Sam, the baggage
smasher, of her nearness, and sam
said, Rats; I'll square that for you.
Taking the trunk in both hands, ne
raised 1t high in the air and
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
Hopeless Case

Mother-What makes you think, dear,
that you love him?
Daughter-Because, mamma, all the
while / was being fitted for my new
gown 1 kept thinking of him instead of
the gown.
The Washington times., 1911-03-16
Must Be a Suffragette

when I grow up I will marry a wife
who will know how to do everything"
And what will you do?'
81? Absolutely nothing. It is she
who will attend to everything
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

Uncle Mose-Look-a-heah, you George
Washington Jefferson, what you all
smokin' dat pipe fo'? Didn't All done
tell you dat smokin' shortins er mans
life moh dan haff?
Young g. w. J.-But you has bin
smokin' mos yo' life, Uncle Nose, and
All reckon yos a purity ole man.
Uncle Mose-Dat's all right erbout
me smollin', nah boy, but dat amt de
point. Abs eighty-foh yeahs ole now.
but eff All hadn't nevah smoked All
might have been moh dan a hundred
yeahs ole by dis time.
The Washington times., 1911-03-16

without hitting himself; besides, he did whack he'd hoer
loud enough for hear him here amt going to have
kid made mOlyCOddle, | tell you
WELL you may chop up said Mrs Pcevcd
GROSSLY. There lots of boxes don't all broken
pieces
Aw, for the love Mike what's the of always borrown
trouble" shouted Mr. Pecvcd Let the kid alone. Teach him
responsibility Don't go naggn and watchin him minute
Give him chance show what of stuff he's made Of tell
that half trouble have from being
watched and nagged much boys They haven't self
reance-it their mothers
around and holer if they do anything a all
81 amt going have my boy brought that said
him. Kid. need kindng I'll you dime do it,
and he
Got all done, pop interrupted youthful voice from the
doorway. Can l have that dime now
"Of course my SON. gcnialy, feeling
pockets you get pile OF small wood?'
the boy but the old hachet dull
chop small all, that
right my said Mr.. Peevcd always find
YOURSELF show reliance that's the be
bet" the boy. Il tried the carving knife
your and shaved the
and t will make bully kindling"
Mrs. Pccvcd snickercd.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
IN THE SOCIAL WORLD
Fancy Dress Ball at Draper
Home Event of Evening.
SOCIETY WELL REPRESENTED

Magnificent Home Is Beautifully
Decorated for the OccasiOn-MIss
Taft and Her House Guests At
tend hall After Dinner Mt Home
of Mrs. Lloyd w. Bowers.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28

and Mrs. Chandler Anderson, Miss Webb,
Miss Mary Howry and Miss Howry, Miss
Reyburn. Lieut.. and Mrs. L. S. Grant,
third; Mr.. and Mrs. John Hays HAM
mond, Miss Marjorie Cotton. the Assist
ant Secretary of the Navy and Mrs.
Be1kman Winthrop. Mr.. Clarence Hay,
son of the late Secretary of State; Mr..
Henry HOyt, Miss Dorothy Williams,
Lieut.. Symington, Miss Margaretta 'Sy-
mons. Miss Mary Carlisle. Mr. and Mrs
Vaudeville Carlisle. Mr.. and Mrs. James
Marion Johnston. Miss Aldrich and her
house guest. Miss Helen Case. of PrOvi-
denCe: Miss Emily Beatty, and Miss Dor
Othy Taylor.
Among those in costume were Mai
Archibald w. Butt. aid to the Presi-
dent. who wore the costume of wild
Westerner, of buckskin, with the fringe
down the outside Of the trousers. a soft,
flowing tie, and a Mexican sombrerO;
Mr.. John Barrett director of the Pan
American Union. as a Chinese mandarin; :;
Miss EudOra Glover, Marie Antoi-
nette; Miss Harriet Switzerland, Pier
rette; Miss Laura Merriam. sister of Mrs.
John WheelwriGht, of Boston, especially
ethereal as Alice in Wonderland; Miss
Esther Slater. of Boston her house
guest. a Norwegian peasant with an
elaborate costume brought over in the
IAN NOM pBt MISS hdl Una DONtl
daughter of the late Lloyd w. Bowers,
Dutch peasant; Mr.. Thomas Bowers, n
cavalier: Miss Alice Whiting, Night:
Miss Julia Whiting. Lady Orde. as rep
resented on canvas by Casway: Mime.
LOewenthaI Cwife OF the counselor of the
Austro- Hungarian Embassy, Viennese
washerwOman; her sister, Countess Nos-
titZ, French peasant: Miss Gladys Ingalls,
and her cousin, Miss Barnard, both as
Pierrettes; VisCOuntess day Cwife of
the naval attaChe of the French Embas-
sy). a green butterfly with green and
silver gauZe over chiffon and silk. with
silver wings; Mrs. Robert HinCkley, Irish
lady, in green velvet with a real ShiIlalah
Cthe costume brought over from Ireland
last summer: Miss Gladys Hinckley. as
Dawn or the Goddess of Fire; Miss Dor
is Haywood, Marie Antoinette: Hon.
katherine Reresford. of England (hOuse
guest of Col. and Mrs Robert NJ.
thompson, as a paper doll, with skirts
of pink Crinkled paper. a wide blue
sash of paper. and her hair in long Curls
and surmounted by a cap of lace: Mrs.
Stephen Pen, of New York daughter of
Col Thompson. court dress with fancy
cap; Col. Thompson was very gorgeous
as an Egyptian prince: Miss Leita
Montgomery, French peasant: Mime.
Vasselieff Cwife of the military attaChe
Of the Russian Embassy, costume of
Russian court lady of the sixteenth cen
tury: Miss SOphy Johnston. Normandy
peasant girl: Miss Lillian Finley. Quaker
girl: Miss LenOre Finley. Marie AntOi-
nette and Miss Celestine Finley, Nea-
politan fisher girl.
Mrs. Edward Beale Mclean. as Prin-
cess Lamballe. wore pale yellow bro
cade satin, trimmed with garland of
roses and roses in her powdered hair:
Miss Adelaide Heath. Colonial dame. in
blue satin and lace: Miss Katherine
BrlttOn was Hungarian peasant girl.
and wore the costume especially made
for her in Budapest; Miss Dorothy
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28

A perforated cylinder mounted on
wheels. with which II revolves, has been
patented by Michigan man for spread
ing ashes or sand On an Icy sidewalk
evenly.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
S.450.O0O TO employees.

New York, Dec. 27.-Elbert II. Gary,
chairman of the United States Steel Cor
pOratiOn. to-day gave out the following
statement regarding the annual distribu-
ton of bonuses to employees:
The United States Steel Corporation
has made It's usual distribution to the en-
pIoyes of the corporation and subsidiary
companies under its bonus plan, which
has been in force nine years. The amount
distributed for 1911 is $1,4JO,OOO.
The corporation will also offer to its
employees the right to subscribe for about
D. 900 shares of stock. as usual, on the
basis of the plan which has been in force
for the period above mentioned. The
price has not been fixed, but it will
probably be a little lower than the mar
ket."
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28

williams made a charming Merry
Widow" in a costume of black and
gold: Miss Emily Eeatty, a Chinese
woman, and Miss Mary MacCauley wore
a very pretty costume of white chiffon
and flowers to portray spring: Nine.
Riano wore a handsome costume as a
court lady of the period of Louis XIV;
Mr.. Thomas Hinckley caused much
laughter as Buster Brown" Mr.. ]. S.
Curtis was dressed as the Mad Hat
ter" and Mr.. Basil Miles as the carpen-
ter in Alice in Wonderland" Mr.. Will
lam Bowie Clark was dressed as Tom
my Atkins. ,and Mr.. Robert Stead wore
the uniform of an English sailor.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28

storage battery illuminated electric
sign has been invented 10 be worn on
the arm of a person selling refreshments
IN theaters and other public places. TO
save the labor OF crying his wares.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
WAKE" FOR DOG
WHO GAVE HIS LIFE
Rescues Child, So Will Get
Burial in Cemetery.

New York, Dec. 27.-Mike a fox ter
rier, which was killed by an automobile
in saving seven-year-OId Vernon Bantz
from being crushed by the motor car
was buried to-day in the dog cemetery
1T Hartsdale, y. Y. His owner, William
!. Murray, of 3l9 East Twcnty-fifth street
;aid to-day, as he prepared to send the
body to Hsrtsdale: He deserves a good
testing place, and I am going to see he
has it,
Befor" the body of the terrier was sent
away the men and women in the tene-
ment house where the Bantz boy and
Murray live held a wake over the dog in
a basement room. The chief mourner
there was Vernon. whose life had been
saved by the dog.
Vernon was at Play in the street when
q big automobile came along at a fast
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28

clip. Mrs. Murray and the boys mother
were talking on the stOOp of their house,
Mrs. Murray holding Mike on A leash
The other children saw the automobile
approaching, but Vernon was bending
over in the street and failed to see it.
Mike tugged on his leash so hard that he
broke away from Mrs. Murray and
dashed out to where Vernon was stand
ing. He sprung on the boy and knocked
him out of the way just in time, but
could not escape the wheels of the auto
mobile himself. The car passed over and
killed him instantly.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
Dinner Guests of Mrs. Bowers.

Miss Helen Taft. Mr.. Robert Taft, and
their house guests were the principal
guests at dinner of Mrs Lloyd w. Bow
ers and Miss Martha Bowers last night.
They attended the Draper ball later.
Miss Harriet Anderson, of Cincinnati.
and Miss Edith Morgan, of New York.
to-day are expected to join the house
party, which now includes Stanhope
Bayne Jones, rof New Orleans, and Mr..
Continued on Page 81, Column ;.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
uccttnr Jusfirf: ,.
COnnissiC
San Deod 10 o-,h,ns.

Christina .Aar.isss "a So ..nEJ..
Orphan Az linn s!onSsy ,.ra.ar p ....
a delightfu. occasion % a.. -aiIr--. III
visitors. = programme, crsnsivtlar -
recitations .' D0s4c nd sr ndSrzs hv
Mr.. Sturtt -r. was tuiiC" a. .. tn. dis
tribution SITS. EsrH 81 "a Es4 ltreft
a box of c Ddg and sr oTsDg III a1#.r.ou
The Washington herald., 1911-12-28
RECALL COMES UP
in JOYCE SUIT
Hearing at Upper Marlboro
of Mandamus Cases.

Special TO The Washington Herald.
Upper Marlboro, Md, Dec. 21.-The Cir
cult Court here to-day, Judge Philmore
Bell presiding, was engaged iR hearing
arguments in two applications for writs
OF mandamus.
The first case was that of former Mayor
Robert E. Joyce, of Mount Rainier. and
others against the mayor and city coun-
Gil to compel that body to order a special
election for the recall OF Councilman
Thomas c. Elliot, of the Fourth ward.
Harry l. Quinn, representing the respond
ents, filed a demurrer to the application.
and arguments on the demurrer were
submitted by Quinn and Charles Benedict
Calvert representing the petitioners. The
court held the matter subcuria.
The second case was an application for
writ of mandamuS compelling the
mayor and common council of Laurel to
submit to the voters of that town the
question of issuing bonds for the con-
structiOn of a sewerage system. The prop
osition has twice been submitted and both
times was defeated. Recently 100 voters
pettioned the authorities to again submi.
the proposition, and the mayor and
mon council refused to order an e.
upon the ground that the law ", ..-.
fed safter the question had .-
submitted.
Charles II. Stanley, Sta roll .
represented the petit Jsnra
P. Currer repTese- a..t :.A'
city council. IT, ..-
under adviser Tie ... i.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1911-12-23
M'CANDLESS MAY
SEEK TO STOP
SALE

The sale of the right to construct
and maintain tunnels ana TO take water
from government lands in Waahoie,
Koolaupoko has been advertised for
January 20. 1912, thus setting the date
for the expected disposal of the license
to the Oahu Sugar Company.
After many conferences with the
Governor and other officials connected
with the matter. the attorneys for the
oahu company succeeded in making
suitable arrangements for the supply
ing Of the plantation with a big water
supply which Is to he brought through
the koolau range at cost OF over
million dollars. This viii mean a
source of pure water just as long as
the underground supply from which the
water comes lasts
when the auctioneer asks for bids on
January 90 II H. not likely that there
will he any opposition, as the terms of
the sale are practically prohihitive. An
upset price of $3.50 per million gallons
has been placed ON the water. and iif-
teen million gallons may be taken each
day. The successful bidder viii be re-
CURED to deposit certificate of de-
post with bank doing business in
this Territory for $4,000. with this
deposit IL To be u guarantee that the
license will he executed within ten days
after the sale or else the amount viii
he forfeited.
There were rumOrs today that l.. l..
Mccandless. who claims certain of the
water rights to he granted by this sale,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1911-12-23

Night Prices. lis, 20 and 80 Cents
Saturday Matinee. IS and 20 Cents
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1911-12-23
PERSONALITIES

INTERPRETER CHANG CIIAU of
the Police Court said this morning
that England and Japan should keep
their hands of China. He believes 1t
Is not their business to butt-in.
JOHN FERRAlRA, Deputy Sheriff
of Waikiki, Maui, is in town, having
arrived this morning in the Mluna
kea. He came down on business, and
will return next Tuesday morning to
Maui.
Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1911-08-02
Young Soldier Tires at Being Re-
moved From Bride.
DiseuIses Himself In Female Gar
ments and Successfully Makes
His Escape From United
States Army Transport.

San FranciSco.-Here's a romance
of the army transport service in which
there are neither swords nor shoulder
straps. 1t is a strictly proper story
in spite of the fact that at the critical
point the hero takes refuge in the
heroine's skirts, during the absence,
of course, of the heroine.
On the records of the transport
Sheridan, which arrived here the other
day from Manila, the hero is de-
scribed as &C. R. Talerifo, dis
charged soldier" After each name is
this note. Left ship at Nagasaki."
The Talerifos were married in Ma
Mia just before the man received his
discharge from the army.
They applied for transportation
home on the Sheridan, and the best
that an unromantic Uncle Sam could
do for them was to provide Mrs. Ia
lerifo with cabin accommodation
and her husband with bunk in the
steerage. Although out of the army,
he was still an enlisted man for the
purpose of transportation. and as
such was barred from accommodation
anywhere but on the troop dack.
Now, a honeymoon cruise is not
much fun where the billing and COO
ing have to be done in accents loud
enough to reach from the troop deck
to the promenade deck, and in full
view Of an observing regiment Of
cavalry. By the time the Sheridan
reached Nagasak the Talerifos came
to the conclusion that honeymooning
under such conditions were what
Sherman said war was and they de-
cided to leave the ship and go home
by liner.
They we're confronted, however. by
another military bar to happiness.
Although Mrs. Talerifo, as a cabin
passenger, was at liberty to go
ashore, this privilege was denied the
enlisted men, with whom her hus-
band was classed, and armed sentries
were posted at strategic points to see
that the soldiers stayed on board.
Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1911-08-02
Edison Tells of the Possibilities In
This Field That Soon May
Be Developed.

An interview with Thomas A. Edi-
son in the New York Dramatic Mirror
quotes the great inventor as saying
that the future of the motion picture
is almost unlimited. He calls atten-
ton to the obvious educational value
of pictures in connection with work
in the elementary schools such as the
teaching of history, geography and
literature. He is sure that the future
of the motion pictures in the amuse-
ment world is a great one and he con-
cludes the subject with the follow
ing comment upon the development
of moving pictures in regard to the
work of the great actors:
That will be only another develop
ment of the art At the present time
the works of the greatest singers are
indelibly recorded in phonograpL and
talking machine records and will be
capable of reproduction for centuries
to come These records make 1t pos
Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1911-08-02
Future of Moving Pictures

sible for all music lovers. to enjoy
good music They will undoubtedly
cultivate higher musical taste in
this country. The same thing is true
of the motion picture, and especially
when it is effectively combined with
the photograph. The great actors
and actresses are able in their short
lives to reach only a fraction of the
public If their gestures and words
are recorded by moving pictures and
the phonograph, they can be seen.
heard and appreciated by every man,
woman and child in the country, not
only now, but for 100 years to come. !"
Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1911-08-02
Young Woman Anxious Over Result
of Brothers Examination Wakes
Up at Home of Teacher.

Pittsburg, Pa.-Imbued with tina
spirit of the evening when the prob
able results of the school examina-
lions were the burden of expectant
anxiety throughout Pittsburg. Miss
Fronia Jennings, aged nineteen,
daughter of E. c. Jennings OF 32C
Sycamore street, business manager OF
the South Hills News, carried her i'm
pressions through dreamland and
woke up the other morning in a
neighbor's house after perilous sleep
walk
Miss Jennings had taken much in
terest In the fortunes of her brother
Paul, aged thirteen, pupil at the
Mount Washington school, who be-
trayed much unrest the other even
ing because of the uncertainty of
passing his exam" for nigh school
promotion. The family had discussed
be subject freely during thu evening
Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1911-08-02
DONS WIFE'S SKIRT

Now comes the skirt act. In the
confusion Of arrivals at the Japanese
port Talerifo managed to make his
way unnoticed to his wife's state
room. When he came out his legs
were draped in his wife's best skirt,
his wife's cloak was around his
shoulders and on his head big pic
ture hat formed a screen from which
fell the heavy veil that hid his face.
Out on deck he tripped and down
the gangway to a waiting sampan.
One Of the sentries assisted him into
the sampan and when Mrs. Talerifo
went down the ladder behind her dis
guised husband she heard the sentry
remark, as he pointed to the figure In
the picture hat:
'She has a hand like a ham"
The Talerifos went to the best hotel
in Nagasaki and engaged the bridal
suite on the Japanese liner Nippon
Maru.