davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
Why Don't He Loan NEm Our
Army, Too?

Why Don't He Loan NEm Our
Army, Too?
Secretary Knox has given the
Mexican army the right to go
through U. 8. territory so they
can get to Lower California to
smash the revolutionists down
there.
The cost of one big battleship
would build 1000 aeroplanes.
BUT
the ship building concerns and
the armor plate works don't make
airships.
When you see your boy study
ing the calendar, you know that
the days till school begins are
growing few In number.
Since Chicago peddlers are for
hidden to cry their wares, they
name their horses Banana" or
Cabbage" and do a big business
by going down the street crying,
Whoa, Banano!"
American travellers spend $780,
100000 year in Europe.
A man by the name OF Totleff
took out a license the other day
to marry Miss Ticheff. Talk about
your rhyming couplets!
with a husband and twelve
boarders, you have no excuse for
stealing COAL" reprimanded Judge
Dolan of Chicago, in fining a wom-
an prison. A Daniel has come
to judgment, yea, a very Daniel!
In truth a husband and twelve
boarders ought to make it hot
enough for any woman.
Tests in Dublin have shown
that the wind will carry disease
bacteria 200 feet and as high as
| 60 feet into the air, even when
there is a heavy rainfall.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
In Little Old New York

new york, fridy-pritty near
ryot up at the Sd av station of the
subway, becos hank wells is car
penter and wares stoar teeth
hank he set out in the morning
with his kit of tools In one hand
and his uther arm Juggling lode
of lumber
in his teeth was his subway
tickit, all ready to be dropped IL
the box
acourse- there was a big crowd
josslin at the tickit box, and just
as hank was stepping up to il
sumboddy give him the elbow In
the small of his back
Tank he give gasp, and the
tickit went back into his face
quite a ways
so then he stood there wheez-
In and snortin, and not able to pro-
duce nuthing except his breth, aud
not mulch of that, and the tickit
man, being quite sum little joker,
he ses
say, do you think you can ride
on this ralerode just by making
them funny faces at the box, drop
sumthing in there and hurry up,
you're blocking the gangway.
just then poor mr.. wells coff-
ed. and out come his stoar teeht,
and fell into the tickit box, and
he swollered the tickit
don't want them teeth. ses the
tickit man, want a tickit
i've swollered the tickit, ses
hank, lie bet the ink on 1t will
pizen me, gimme back my teeth
all right. SEES the tickit man,
hear Is your teeth, after this keep
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
The PETITION

Excelency OF United States America
We the Undersigned Washington.
herewith for relief from the
dependent directly
second-That by private corporations
high force the ultimate to exorbtant
necessity times the production
Thrd-Therefore your petitioners pray that law be
n or Of dn b e ooa an 9
Alaska establishing railroad deliver coal
to ddewater Controller Bay Alaska building dock and
establishing bay
only shipping point but also coaing station for
providing colers deliver coal from
United States Of America establishing
coal uners at certain % the state Of here
of production plus of
cipa on certain bond matter named N f'
FourhThat the government fix and provide through
delivering coal government
points Washington
Fifth-The government established at the
following named points in Washington Tacoma
sixtI-That to those issued for
popular subscription, provide carrying Of
projects before mentioned the carried
existing immediate enact
of legislation herein set forth shall pray
NAME K ADDRESS.
...................
...... ....~s
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
TODAY's BEST STORY.

Walter Damrosch dinner Chicago
Debusy qualification,
his
the that Gabrielle dAnnunzo
dued together Paris that Debussys
stand 1t isn't like of modern music which puzzles people
death. musicale
bated vonst exclaimed Enthusiastically admired that
ed! kind of wild, eee
madness that thrilled the heart
coldly, putting a
string on violin kansas City Star. :
there much a house when Bill put
Very small"
Much appause?"
dog n nc his tall
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

them out of my tickit box. and you
go buy another tickit IL you want
to ride, mayby you had a tickit
and swallowed It like you say. but
! amt got no ray machine to
find out wether this is a stall or
not
so then br. wells he showed his
grinders back into his face so
he could talk better, and he hol-.
lers, lie walk first, durn your old
ralerode, and he beat it with his
lumber and his tools
evryboddy else laffed, nuthing
like having good time when sum
body else is the cote
tohny.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

war was raging
about 1T and the
Princess Pierre
Tropbetsky was
born there and
then. A day we'll
worth marking
on the calendar.
The princess has
had a busy life
since that event.
full day. AS
Amelie Rives,
she has written
often and well,
whole rows of
entertaining sto-
ries; as a poet
and dramatist
she maintains
quite a neat bat
ting q V ara u q
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

bulletin that the
Sioux Indians
under l. l t t | Q
Crow had at
tackled the town
of New u | m,
M l n n, a n d
b IL t C h 9 r Q d
a number of SOL
diers and citi-
zens. w 1 t h
whites to fight
at the south and
reds to extermi-
nate af the north
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
NOTICE

The Caswell Optical Co. have
built up a successful practice in
the city in less than one year.
Why?
Three strong reasons:
1st-Eyes exained right.
2d.-Glasses fitted right.
3d.-Prices right.
CASWELL OPTICAL co.
734 st. Helens. Masonic Temple.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

For a brief period OF time she
was the wife of John Armstrong
Chaloner, insane only in New
York, and the author OF the
who's looney now?" telegram.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Production of cement I'm the
United States increased by TO-
100000 barrels in 1910 over
1909, and the industry is now in
the first eight ''extractive indus
tries of the country. Standard
Oil still holds palm for extract
ing however.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
Busy and Hence Happy

Mrs Aetha Gilbert for ten prison maron
has IL female prsonerwltes
low bring about downfall
girls busy the reclaim
connection
be kept busy and hence bright happy.
What fine work church take
Godi
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Now the Ideal Time for the
journey
for a months;
approaching the
tiful coors then t The who
fami oil
Signals, Steel
Coaches (saey everything
beautiful Columbia Gorge; you
land Salt Lake City Denver Colorado
Through Sleeping which spendd
journey
abroad in the
desn
TRY TT
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

San Diego man gave his pros
pective mother-in-law a beating
and then at once married her
daughter. Maybe he's the fellow
who invented the notion about
taking time by the forelocl1."
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
Wife Got Tip Top Advice

my wife wanted me to take
our boy to the doctor to cure an
ugly boil" writes d. Frankel, of
Stroud, Okla. II said, Put Buck
lens Arnica Sa1ve on it. She did
go, and 1t cured the boil in a short
time" Quickest healer of Burns,
Scalds, Cuts, Corns Bruises,
lSprains, Swellings. Best Pile cure
on earth. Try 1t. Only 25c at
Ryner Malstrom Drug Co., 938
Pacific ave.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Entered at the postofffos at Tacoma, WASH as
second-class matter. TELEGRAPHrc SERVICE
OF UNITED PRESS ASSOCIATION.
PUBLISHED EVERY EVENING EXCEPT SUN
DAY BY THE TACOMA TIMES PUBLISHING
COMPANY.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
and Union Pacific
Aug. IA, Is, 16, II, 81, %, %,
%, 20, 80; Sept. 1, 2, 4, 8, 6, 7.

These the dates
Eastern Middle
31st) at Exceptionally Figures
From Seattle Tacoma, Portland Harbor
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
OUR DAILY BIRTH
DAY PARTY.

August %, 1868, was a mark
ed day in Richmond, Va. A great
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
most
ANYTHING
JOSH WISE
' SAYS!

49,. - 49,
"Baz g o o d
hunch fell help
less o N { n
board sidewalk,
an Doc Koozer,
jest from col
lege, decided he
had infant pa
ralysis. Later
Baz came TO an
admitted h e d
been paralyzed,
but not from in
fancy"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

When those English dukes who
are coming over to start a few
thousand tenant farms run into
some of western Canada's land
tax ideas, they'll let go quicker
than the fellow who picked up a
hot poker did.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
TODAY IN HISTORY

Aug. 23, 1862, the north had
diversion of war news by the
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Venus, the star so bright i'm the
western sky evenings now, be-
comes the morning star Sept. IA.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

the government certainly did have
! its hands full for a time.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
Keep This From Brother

Johnny had been bad"
am
what you doin?" Johnny, grim
Harpers.
visible this month by telescopes
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Upton Sinclair tells the teegraphing poe
rs dangerous experiment. And kI
his last we warn him that bringing be nigh fatal
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

French scientists declare that
sleep is simply the effect of a
brain poison which clears the
system of other poisons. Alas!
they make us out germy even in
our sleep.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
o 90 &c o Q Q . 0

People born on this day come
under the Big Dipper. This is a
dangerous sign to come under es-
pecially when in the hands OF an
irate housewife. The most pro-
pitious sign to people of this class
is beer sign seen over the right
shoulder when the thermometer
is nearing the hundred mark. To
Big Dipper subjects: Beware of
standing in front of a trolley car
while watching an airship on Fri
days, as this is your Jonah day.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23
Observations

Hartman, great German violin
list, says that what we lack In
America is "dreamers." Wonder
| what he calls those fellows who
sit all day on cracker box in the
corner grocery whiting on a
stick?
More than 100 men from the
forest service will gather fir and
pine cones this fall to reseed the
burned-over districts in Idaho.
| Eight men with artificial legs
and one with wooden arm,
played nine fat men, the smallest
Weighing 240 pounds, the aggre-
gate being 1925 pounds, in a
baseball game in Spokane recent
lily. The fat men lost. They
couldn't slide bases as fast as
the fellows with wooden stumps.
His name was Robert Gorden
lLowdermilk and her name was
Beulah 1vena Bath. Now, II he
allowed her a milkbath every day,
would she be as beautiful as
Anna Held? Quick, the stretcher!
Cousin Will Taft will now pro-
coed to bust his suspenders try
ing to make out that that ''inde-
feasible" wool schedule is really
defensible in spite of all he has
said.
New York commission is to be
appointed to regulate prize
fights and prevent fake" pugilists
from appearing just for the sake
of getting the short end of the
purse. Somebody suggests that
such a commission be selected to
take care of would-be concert
givers.
Senator on a hot day wore a
coat so thin his suspenders show
ed through> Ladylike correspond
ent was shocked and wrote home
about it. Moral: Don't wear sus-
penders when there's CORE
spondent around.
Bob la Toilette and Hiram
Johnson are mentioned as a team
for 1912. We await Mr.. Bryan's
decision.
Peru has a tree that rains nine
gallons of moisture from its
leaves a day.
"Out of 5000, 900 900 of gold
shipped out of Alaska to Seattle,
only about 100000 has been in
the hands of thieves. and the bulk
of this amount has been restored
to its proper owners" Wonder
| IL they would be able to say that
of the coal from Alaska?
Publishing houses announce
ments would almost make one
believe that all authors do now
ladays is buy autos and steam
yachts or take vacations in the
woods. We know several who
DON'T.
french scientists declare that
sleep is simply the effect of a
brain poison which clears the
system of other poisons. Alas!
they make us out germy even in
our sleep.
Venus, the star so bright in the
western sky evenings now, be-
comes the morning star Sept. IA.
San Diego man gave his pros
pective mother-in-law beating
I and then at once married her
daughter. Maybe he's the fellow
who invented the notion about
taking time by the forelocl."
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Prof. Sargent of Harvard wants
women to discard skirts for trous-
ers.
WILL
pa have the right to go through
mas trousers pockets then, prot? ?
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

"Out of $500. 600. 900 of gold
shipped out of Alaska to Seattle,
only about 100000 has been In
the hands of thieves, and the bulk
of this amount has been restored
to its proper owners" Wonder
| IL they would be able to say that
of the coal from Alaska?
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Publishing houses announce
ments would almost make one
believe that all authors do now
adays is buy autos and steam
yachts or take vacations in the
woods. We know several who
DON'T.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Peru has a tree that rains nine
gallons of moisture from its
leaves a day.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Bob la Toilette and Hiram
Johnson are mentioned as a team
for 1912. We await Mr.. Bryan's
decision.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

Tests in Dublin have shown
that the wind will carry disease
bacteria 200 feet and as high as
so feet into the air, even when
there is a heavy rainfall.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

The cost of one big battleship
would build 1000 aeroplanes.
BUT
the ship building concerns and
the armor plate works don't make
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

When you see your boy study
ing the calendar, you know that
the days till school begins are
few In number.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-08-23

More than 100 men from the
forest service will gather fir and
pine cones this fall to reseed the
burned-over districts in Idaho.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
CUSPIDOR EXPLODEC
 IN CRIMINAL COURT

Chicago. April 24.-An explosion of gun powder in a cuspidor during session of the criminal court caused consider able excitement today. Judge William D. Dever had just opened court and an at- torney appearing for the defendant in an Italian murder case threw a lighted cigarette into the cuspidor.
 As the first witness for the afternoon was about to take the stand there was an explosion, breaking the cuspidor and fire attacked small wooden pillar iri the court room. The room was full of Italian witnesses and friends of the par- ties supoenaed. and an uproar followed in which several women were tramplea and one became hysterical. No one was injured seriously and the fire was ex- tinguished by baiiffs.
 The sheriff's office is Investigating the al
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
NORFOLK RACES

Norfolk Va, April 24.-F'irst race, sell ing, 4-year-olds and up. six furlongs: Warden, 1O7, 13 to 3. even, l to ?, out. won; John Mars. 112 (McCahey), to 1, to 1, 4 to 5, second; Grandissimo, 10S (Schuttinger), 13 to 1, 6 to B. to 5, third; Time 1:O7 4-5. Paul Davis, Lucille R., Hudas Sister Chief Hayes, Pete ran.
 Second race, 2-year-olds, four furlongs: Overman, 115 Madiera), even, ? to 5. out, won; Kittery, 115 (Godstein), to 5, to 4, out, second; Naughty Rose, 112 (Mr- Intyre), 12 to 1. 3 to 1, even. third. Time, :51 2-5. Orphantry ran. Overman, Bel mont entry.
 Third race, selling, 4-year-olds and up, six furlongs: Tom Shaw, l13 (Tapln), 21a to l, to 10, 1 to 3, out, won; Light house, 112 (Peake), 10 to l, to l, 2 to 1, second; Vienna, 10S CPickens), 30 to 1, 12 ferno Queen, Amerique, Grecian Bend, O. E. Herndon, Hibernica Laughing Eyes ran.
 Fourth race, 3-year-olds and up, mile: Hoffman, 1l2 (Goldstein), even, out, won; Judge Monck, 95 (Mamie Cahey), to 1, even. out, second; Sir Edward, 112 CWar- ringtom, F to l, to 1. to 5, third. Time, :43 2-5. Afnar and Live Wire ran.
 Fifth race. selling, s-year-olds and up. six furlongs: Cooney K, 102 (Callahan). 15 to 1, to l. to 10, won. Rye Straw, TOT CMcCahey), to 5, out, second Black Chief, 90 (Edwards), to l. 3 to ?, to ,, third. Time, :lS 1-5 Pathfinder, John A. Munroe ran. Black Chief lost rider and broke his foot. Judges gave the horse third place.
 Sixth race, selling. 3-year-olds and up. one and sixteenth miles: Horace E., 105 (Taplin), to l, to l, ? to ,, won; Golconda, 9S Sweeney, ? to l, to 5, ' to 10. second: Brevite, 109 Warrington, ' to 1, 21a to l. even, third. Time, 49 1-E. Idle Michael, Juggler, NeeMoleete. Miss Officious, Hedge Rose. The Golden But terfy ran.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
ONE MILLION MEN
 FOR GAME 0F WAR

Berlin, April 24.-German will have under arms in connection with field ma neuvers this summer practically 100000 men. In addition to the regular army strength of 622.000 men. over 355,0o0 re- servists will be called to the colors, mak- ing a total effective strength for the army of 977,69S. Adding to these the men serv- ing with the fleet, an armed force of con- sderably more than a million will be en- gagged in the gigantic war game.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
Heresy Trial Begins

Pittsburg, April 24.-The Pittsburg Pres bytery today took up the heresay overture offered at a recent meeting calling on the gate alleged heretical writings and teach ings lN the Rev. pr. Francis Brown, pres ident 'of the Union Theological seminary, Schenectady, N. Y., and writings by the Rev. Dr. William S. Browne. a professor in the seminary. and recommended that the presbytery take no action. The writers. in the opinion of the committee, had not eombatted any doctrine or declar- ssion of the Presbyterian church. Any
 w the committee stated, it was mat
 for their own presbytery to deal with.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25

ranking member of the postoffice com mittee.
 Thursday, Senator Gallinger, chairman of the reorganization committee, stated that the committee probably would be able to report on that day.
 Senator Gallinger's motion prevailed.
 The Canadian reciprocity bill was con- veyed from the House to the Senate to- day and without comment was referred to the committee on finance.
 This cannot be taken up until the or ganization of the committee is completed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
Wells Wins in Sixth Round

London, April 24.-Bombadier Wells made a chopping block of Ian Hague in a fight tonight for the English heavyweight championship and the Lonsdale belt Both contestants for the title are Englishmen. Wells, after ad- ministering severe punnhment to his opponent, knocked him out in the sixth round,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25

present the names of members of their group for one-fourth of the republican committee places. There has been no comparison of lists and therefore no agreement as to individuals.
 The regulars have undertaken to give the progresslves about 9 per cent of ths assignments but they have failed to do this In the committee on finance. After a long struggle they decided that .he regulars should retain control of this most important committee and will therefore place only the name of Senator LaFol- lettee of the progressive wing on this committee The progressives have steadily contended for two representatives and they will present the names of Senators LaFollette and Cummins.
 Unquestionably the failure of the regu- lars to give the Iowa senator place on the finance committee will lead to sharp discussion and the controversy will ulti- mately be taken into the Senate in the hope that the democrats might come to the assistance of the progressives in carrying out their programme. The regu- lars are quite determined on this one point and probably will vote it through, because they claim the dominant party should have control of a committee deal ing so generally with partisan questions.
 Ratio of Committee
 As reorganized the committee will democrats. To give the progressives two members would be to turn over the control of the committee to combina- tion of democrats and progressives in case a combination should be made. The decision to cut Senator Cummins out will leave three republican va cancies to be filled with regulars. One of these places will go to Senator Gal finger of New Hampshire and the other two to western republicans of the reg ular persuasion whose names have not been divulged. The democrats have de- cided to fill the three democratic va cancies by the appointment of Senators Williams of Mississippi, Johnson of Maine and Kern of Indiana. The selec- tions will result in ginving the radi- cal democrats a majority of the demo- cratic representation on the committee It has been expected that Senator Kenyon, the new Iowa senator, would align himself with the progressiyes in their fight for committee representa- tion. but he said today he would take no part in the contest over the com mittees.
 The decision to this effect was induced by this late arrival. He, however, counts himself a progressive in the matter of
 legislation and probably will be found
 voting with that wing of the party on most measures.
 Senator Jonathan Bourne, Jr.. one of
 the ''progressiwes' on the republican com
 mittee on committees, will be given the
 chairnianship of the committee on post | offices and postroads. This was an- nounced at the White House today by i Senator Shoot, who said also that Sen
 ator Clapp would get the chairmansh.p
 of the committee on interstate commerce
 to which he is entitled under the senior- | ity rule.
 1 The selection of Mir. Bourne means that
 Senator Grain will retain the chairman : ! snip Of the committee on rules, as the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
Taft Accepts Invitation

Washington. April 24-An invitation to attend the celebration of Columbus Day by the Knights of Columbus of Boston was tentatively accepted by President Taft today.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
Pathfinding Car Starts

Washington. April 24.-Ane pathfind- ing car of the "Glidden reciprocity tour started from here today for Ot-. tawa to lay out the route for the an- nual automobile tour.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
HOWARD PLAYS TECH

Howard college plays the fast Georgia Tech baseball club here Wednesday on Redwood Field.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-04-25
THE REPUBLICANS WILL MEET TODAY Working Hard to Organize
 the Senate INSURGENTS PROTEST Trouble in the Senate Committee on Committees Has Not Cleared
 Up and Senate Is Still
 Unorganized

Washington, April A.-The republican
 committee on committees of the senate u.ill meet tomorrow in the hope of con cluding its business and the expectation of having ready a full list of committee assignments for caucus to be held Wednesday. The seven representatives of the regulars will present complete schedule while the four progressives will