davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

The little lamb that Mary had
Was puzzled much no doubt
To figure why the teacher should
Get mad and turn him out.
|"I may not be so much on looks,
Yet l am here to say
i was as handsome as the dude
Who called on her that day.
"She turned me out, she let him
It was her right to choose
didn't wear striped cravat
Nor patent-leather shoes.
"Yet If she wanted company
/ surely should have done;
She knew that l would be a sheep,
He was already one."
Nature made grass green that
COWS might not be affrighted at
the approach of human.
Before the bar of our own con-
science the jury never disagrees.
A learned Judge has decided
that if there is only one umbrella
in the house the man is entitled
to it. The court did not say, how
ever, how the woman should give
1t to him.
Some gentlemen in the agricul-
tural department no doubt regret
now that they did not take the
small-mouthed bass as model.
The fact that you are going to
play a double-header should not
make you careless in the first
game.
Two Philadelphia men held a
boxing contest without taking off
their dress shirts. They probably
called the affair fisticuffs.
Rev. Tycoon Kennedy of Toronto
says that men and women ought
to kiss moro. But where will they
get the time, with day confined
to "a hours.
Many a man lives on high
bluff overlooking the watered
stock.
The height of courage is the
photographer who dares to tell the
truth.
Considering the wind wasted on
trying to blow the foam off, one
wonders where the cyclones come
from.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

the comradeship
the
years binding
the forgetting the
The laughed song
AS grpped the horny of fe nched
AS toed
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
OPERATIONS.

The other evening a crowd gath
cred outside and hooted the wor-
shippers. Brother Adam came out
on the porch and told them, eff
you had more of the grace of God
in your hearts you wouldn't come
around here hopting."
Whereupon, the Ncrowd went
home. A day or so later the Zion
City police escorted the society to
the city limits and put them on
an electric car for Chicago. That's
the last heard, so far, of the
"HolieSt" sect.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

said. 1--WE do not believe in mar
rage. We do not believe the
brides of the Lord should have
children. The Lord has His work
cut out for us to do.
1--WE sleep in one room, men
and women alike. We are all
brides of the Lord men and
women alike. We sleep on the
floor, so we may get in closer
touch with the Lord. The Lord
gets close to us in our meetings.
That's why we shout for joy. We
are pure in mind, pure in heart
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

and pure In spirit"
The men in the society are stall
wart and two of them are only
about 80 years old. The women
are older and have no claims to
good looks.
Persons who do not live in
close communion with the
Lord" said Sister Ruth, cannot
understand our beliefs"
"And we don't want to under
stand Them" say the neighbors.
1.-THE idea, running around the
house naked!"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

THEIR BIBLICAL
AUTHORITY

Therefore I say unto you,
take no thought for your life.
what we shall eat, or what
We shall drink; nor yet for
your body, what We shall put
on. Is not the life more
than meat and the body more
than raiment?-Matthew vi,
25.
Therefore take no thought
saying. What shall We eat?
or, What shall we drink? or,
Wherewithal shall we be
clothed Matthew vi, 81.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

odAic IhihS lot
the teachers, is
w i | / | a m A.
O h a ncellor, a
product of Day
ton, o., W h o
grew into i'm
portance in Nor
w a ! X, Conn.
School manage
ment, from the
janitor's work
to d r | v | n G
knowledge into
unwilling heads,
has been his life
work. Probably,
despite the fact
that he is but
"A today, Chan
cellor can give
m o S t of our
gray haired ed
ucators a good
handicap a n d
beat them in
the gentle art
Of filling youth
Pu | minds with
Il akb DE- -
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
POOR OLD DAD.

81 understand your father met
violent death. How did it come
about?"
well, you see, he was at a
musical show one night and one
of the girls in the chorus ripped
her tights. The manager stepped
to the footlights and asked if any
one in the audience had a pin?
Poor father was killed in the
rush. ALDER &C. ALDER.
LONG ON LIFE
Mrs. Murphy's husband was ex-
tremely i'll, and she consulted a
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
CLASS DIsNIISSED,

Someone asks: is short
harem bathing suit on a tall girl
problem in long division?"
Hardly"
"a vulgar fraction" we should
say.
MIKE BEWARD G. WILL IVES
TON.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Buckeye Powder Co. sues the
Dupont Powder trust for $4,000
900 damages under the Sherman
antitrust act. Those Dupont fell
lows must be way behind in pres
ent day big business methods. They
could have started a panic and
swallowed that Buckeye bunch a
la Steel trust or simply blown the
Buckeyes up a la Standard.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Rev. Adams of Acata, CAL, CON-
fesses that he robbed a hardware
store because his congregation
owed him $3.50 back pay. OF
course, they can't prosecute the
congregation.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
WHERE?

Paris modistes say that the cor
set will soon be entirely done
away with.
Nevertheless, We venture to
predict that. it will squeeze in
some place.
AVERY & HART.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

"a bird in the
hand is worth
two In the bush"
into more sehol-
arly military Lam
guage. Sherman
then had Atlanta
and he wired
Gen. Halleck: "If
/ were sure that
x-o.fI
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

earn, Denver's dog-catcher, has
been bitten by 1000 dogs in his
time. He rubs in carbolio acid
and little Christian science when
bitten.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
HTbEEkR,BfST JOKES fHk2aIhb BROADWAY

hopeful resignation, ivan good
thing is, me poor man is six foot
tree in his stockings, SO he'll last
some time yet"
FRANK FOGARTY.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Why not settle that Maine mud
die by letting that &c wet major
ity get as wet as they want to?
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

a song grew white as the
years were told,
o the path of dreams was a lonely
path and the mountain peaks
were cold
The sun was set like a coronet
where the heavens opened
blue,
Yet never a flower beside the way,
and never a dream came true.
Back to the stricken ways of men
/ came bereft and poor,
Back where the human cry grows
sweet in the vines of cabin
door,
Back where the toiling human
throng smiles dying along the
street,
Back where the roses spring from
tears to blossom about my
feet.
The rain beat hard on the COM
mon day, and the smiling
storms fell chill,
And grief held sway on the human
way, that always ran uphill;
But sorrow and pain We're not in
vain, for Love was a diadem
White with light for the sons of
highland / was one with
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
The Dream Path
BY LARRY HO.

sad will follow the of through the
golden sky,
And live away the hurt of things world wang
will set soul the goal till vision fiBthe air.
And leaves divine longing
the path ofNdf
Away the clutch of moral tn the human
drfted the silent
And soul free of the eahbon unstaned of the
earth-born
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
LOOK LIVELYi

"That girl is all the world to
me. What would you advise me
to do?"
"See more of the world, old
man" WILL BRENNAN.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

soon be in our possession, / should
be tempted to march for Milledge-
willie and Augusta; but / must first
secure what / have"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
Observations

Hal John Redmond's idea of
home rule means a ministry OF
irishmen subject to recall by Irish
men only.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

dOCtOr.
''Pm sorry, madam" he said,
gravely, but your husband is dy-
ing by inches"
"Well," she said, with an air OF
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

One of the opportunities always
before us is that of living up to
what our friends believe of us. j
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

If there is no future punishment
how shall We account for the man
who invented ff-bosomed shirts?
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
OUR DAILY BIRTH
DAY PARTY.

When he isn't writing textbooks
for the pupils he is doing the
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25
TODAY IN HISTORY

Sept. rs, 1864, Gen. w. T..
Sherman put the old adage that
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Editor Pulitzer might scoop Edi-
tor Hearst by offering a prize of
$4,000 to the aviator who first
gets his machine repaired.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

You can't be a live wire with
out shocking some careless folk.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Send an answer to that Seattle
minister who asks: why should
we abhor the Mormon who drives
his wives abreast and welcome the
society man who drives EN- tan
demY"
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1911-09-25

Entered at the postoffios at Tacoma. wash. as
second class matter. TELEGRAPHIC SERVICE
OF UNITED PRESS ASSOCIATION
PUBLISHED EVERY EVENING EXCEPT SUM-
DAY ny THE TACOMA TIMES PUBLISHING
COMPANY.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05
HER FRIENDS
GOOD ADVICE
The Results Made This NeWburS
Lady Glad She Followed
Su99esti0n.

Newburg, Ala.-"For more than q
year." writes Myrtle Cothrum, of this
place, II suffered with terrible pains IN
my back and head. had a sallow
complexion, and my face was covered
with p!mples. Our family doctor only
gave me temporary relief.
A friend of mine advised me to try
Cardui so I began taking it, at once,
and with the best results, for was
cured after taking two bottles. My
mother and my aunt have also used
Cardui and were greatly benefited.
shall always praise Cardui to sick
and suffering women"
Cardui is g. purely vegetable, per-
fectly harmless, tonic remedy lcr wo-
men, and will benefit young and ole.
Its ingredients are mild herbs, hav-
ing a gentle, tonic effect, on the wo-
manly constitution.
Cardui has helped a million women
back to health and strength.
Have you tried it? If not, please
do. 1t may be just what you need.
N.B.-Wrte to: Ladies' Advisory Dept. Ghnttn;;
nooga Medicine Co.. Chattanooga. Tenn. for Special
Instructions. and 6i-page book. Home Treatment
for Women" sent in plain wrapper. on request.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

ing surplus lands to be devoted to
other crops and the growing of live
stock.
It is clearly more profitable to a
farmer to produce fifty bales of cot
ton on fifty acres than to produce
peIpunu eul no lunous emBs eql
acres, for he will receive the same
amount for his cotton and will have
fifty acres for other uses. Under or
binary circumstances, every increase
in the average yield Of cotton per
acre reduces the cost of production
per pound and yields the farmer a
larger margin of profit between the
cost of growing his crop and the sell
ing price.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05
Strong Political Combine.

While Senator Tillman has never
said so publicly, there seems to be a
we'll developed notion in some quar-
ters that he will fight Blease in the
campaign next year. The Sumter
Watchman and Southron says it has
been wandering what would be the
polit;hhl outcome of Senator Till
mans and Chief Justice Jones visit
to Mr.. John G. Richards,
of Liberty ....., and while We have
not yet found an answer, the follow
ing editorial in the Lancaster News
is somewhat Illuminating.
"It is very gratifying to Judge
Jones friends here to know that
their distinguished fellow towns
man is being urged to enter the gu
bernatorial race, and it is earnestly
hoped by them that he will be pre-
vailed upon to do so.
Judge Jones would make an
ideal chief executive. His ire
proachable private character and
srotless public record, his preeminent
ability, fine discriminating judg-
ment and universally recognized i'm
partiality in the administration of
Justice, his wide knowledge Of men
and affairs, peculiarly and happily
Fit him for the Office Of governor of
Son.h Carolina.
"As a candidate for the office,
Judge Jones would be irresistible. He
has no superior in the State as a
stump speaker. Ever cool and delib-
crate, quick and ready in debate, re-
sourcceul, firm and courageous, elo-
u.ent and forceful in delivery, the
iud . IS man few if any would care
to tac...le in public campaign"
Commenting on the ABOVE the
Waterman and Southron says "if
Chief Justice Jones should enter the
race against Gov Blease, and if he
has the assurance of the support of
Senator Tillman, Mr.. Richards and
their friends, Cole Blease will not
serve two terms as governor, all prec"
edents to the contrary notwithstand-
ing. Chief Justice Jones is strong
man and if the prohibition-local-op-
toin whiskey abomination is kept out
of the campaign and the contest
made strictly on the merits of the
two men and on their official records
Jones will win if any one brought
out to defeat 'Blease can turn the
trick"
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05
Very GOOD Idea.

MT. John Wood, secretary Of the
Spartanburg Board of Trade, has is.
sued a call to about two hundred
representative citiJenS of Spartan
burg county togather in the rooms
of the Board of Trade one Monday
for the purpose of organizing a Spar
tanburg County Board Of Trade. Mr.
Wood wants every township in the
county to be represented and in the
organization each township will have
a vice president and a member Of the
executive committee. In his circular
letter to the farmers, asking them to
join in the meeting MIR. Wood. among
other things, asks the following
questions:
"Now, we are going ito try to do
business with this organization. Come
to the meeting at the court house on
salesday and bring along some OF
your neigbors. Don't you want to
get rid of grade crossings? Don't you
want better telephones? Don't you
want to keep some o. the money at
home that Is being sent away every
year? Don't you want to have the
very best agricultural paper to be
had? Don't you want to know wheth-
er or not you can make more money
off of your farm? Don't you want
to hear addresses on live subjects by
The best men to be had? Don't you
want e market for the stuff you can
raise at home?"- Don't you think the
people of Spartanburg county ought
to get closer together, and pull to-
gether better, and prove that we
have the best county on earth? Do
you want to sell your land, Do you
want to trade? Don't you honestly be-
lieye that we could do a thousand
things for ourselves If we got togeth-
er and talked about it without some
body trying to get job every time
we met? We know you do and we
can get anything on earth II we "go
after it,"
The Greenville Daily Piedmont
says the idea of the Spartanburg Sec
retary strikes us as being very good
one if it can be put into practice. II
city board of trade can accom-
plish anything for city we see
no reason why a county one should
not accomplish much for county.
We shall watch with interest the re.
suit of Secretary Woods efforts in
his county board of trade scheme
We are satisfied that its possibilities
are great. 1t would bring the coun-
try and the county seat very close
to ogether, and they could pull togetr-
cr and help each other in many ways
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05
Southern Railway Helping.

"To clothe the whole of humanity
would require 100000 bales of
cotton each year" This statement
was made by President Hobbs of the
National association Of Cotton Manu-
facturers, at its recent annual meet
ing in Boston, Mass. Mr.. Hobbs said
that of the 1,500,000,000 inhabi-
tants of the world only 500,000,00O
are only completely clothed, while
750,0OO,OO0 are partially clotred and
25O,OOO,OO0 are practically not cloth
ed at all.
AS civilization advances, the pro-
portion Of the partially clothed and
the unclothed will decrease, and this
with the increase Of population in
civilized countries, will call for an in
creased supply of cotton. The cot
ton belt of the United States now fur
rishes fully two-thirds of the worlds s
supply of cotton anad stl
supply of cotton, and, as the demand
inceeases, will be called upon great
" to increase it's annual production
1t is a clear understanding of this
condition that has led the Southern
Railway company to organize a Cot,
ton culture department, to work in
cooperation with the United States
AGRICULTURAL department and the ag'
ricultural authorities of the South
ern states, to keep the cotton produc'
ton of the South abreast of the de-
mand by bringing about the adop
ton OF those cultural methods which
will result in larger avXearge yielc
per acre thus increasing the profita.
| bleness of cotton growing and leay
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE

CITY
5S Sellers Avenue, Lot 80 22O.
5 room house.
"a w. Amelia. Big house and lot.
Bargain.
Lot S. Windsor, 70 $50. Adjoin-
ing Laundry
Lot S. Windsor, 81 1914. Near
Calhoun.
Lot w. Russell, so $50. Near
Windsor.
Lot on E. Russell.
Lot on Bates place.
Lot on Orange Court. Very large
lot
JAMIsoN, S. G.
Big lot, store and dwelling COM
bined. Bargain.
COUNTY.
Is acres in Fogle settlement. Ben
Johnson Place.
105 acres on Sou. Ry., about one
mile East of Branchville.
235 acres near Rowesville.
81 acres in the Thompson settle
ment near Branchville.
176 acres near Stilton.
SO acres near Cope.
145 acres near Bolin.
105 acres near Jamison on Public
road.
$40 acres on road between Bethel
church and Rowesville. q
444 acres on Cannon's bridge road.
$50 acres near Eastern boundary
Of City.
81 acres Norhern part of city.
REAL ESTATE WANTED.
We have several inquiries for
houses in the city. If you have any
thing you will sell, see us.
ORANGEBURG TRUST co.
5 Court House Square.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Wanted-Good Housekeeping Mag
azine requires the services of re-
presentative in Orangeburg to look
after. subscription renewals and to ex-
tend circulation by special methods
which have proved unusally success
full. Salary and commission. Pre-
vious experience desirable, but not
essential. Whole time or spare time.
Address, with references. J.F. Fair
banks, Good Housekeeping Magazine,
3S1 Fourth Ave-, New York City.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Governor Foss, of Massachusetts,
accuses President Taft Of inconsistent
cy and dangerous conservatism. "1n
order to lie effective progressive Re-
publicans must come into the Demo-
cratic ranks" said the governor.
"The speeches of President Taft and
Senator Lodge on the tariff at the
Essex county Republican outing only
serve to widen tn brach in tn Rpubll-
publican party
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

The Rock Hill Herald says: "up to
the pres ant time over 1900 applica-
tions for admission to Winthrop col
lege have been received. Of this
number only about 700 can be ad-
mitted On account of lack of dor
mitory room. Here is something for
the lawmakers to ponder over. Thir-
teen hundred girls seeking education
at Winthrop and only room for sew
en- hundred! It is shame on the
State" The Herald must remem-
Der thai. there is limit to the mon
ey raising capacity of even the State.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

That it would be far better to send
5000 chidlsss wives out of this coun-
try and bring in an equal number Of
6ifddSffsshi0r ea Wives, was the state
ment made at the Winona, N. Y, Bi-
BILE confer ance by the Rev. George
Stuart, of Clevelend, Tenn. "Wo-
men and lap dogs do not make a
country; It takes fathers, mothers,
and Children" said DR.. Stuart.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Farm for sale in Dodge county, Ga,
10 miles from Eastman, contain
ing 1882 acres. 12-horse farm op-
en-, 18 shanties with brick CHM
neys, artesian water, l new 4-roope
dwelling. Will take $4,000 cash
for this place to make quick sale.
This Is the biggest bargain in land
in Georgia. Come to see me quick
If you mean business Lands ad-
joining bringing SIS per acre. w.
Wynne Hawkinsville, Ga.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

United States Senator Lorimer be-
came an issue again in the Grand Ar
my Of the Republic when he spoke in
Illinois before the Marion county
soldiers reunion, and as result the
veterans ere split into factions for
and against him. The senator called
down pa rticular ire when he de-
nounced the recall and declared that
he stood for the "old methods.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

If what the Georgetown Times
saws about Charleston is true the old
city musl be in a bad fix politically.
Our cotelnporary says "The News
and Courier seems to be making a
desperate fight for clean politics in
Charleston: but we are afraid the
buns h;.se that towr about cinched.
Tho blind tigers AMI criminal ele-
ment have been given too much
latitude by Mayor Rhett in the past.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Congr, sman Underwood places the
responsibility for the failure of this
congress TO enact tariff reform
measures upon the President. That
is exactely where it belongs, and un-
less public sentiment changes be-
fore the election next year Mr.. Taft
will realize his mistake after the op-
portunity to save himself from de-
portunit5 to save himself from de-
feat and his party from annihilation
at the rolls has passed.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

We have 10 idea that Senator Till
man will take an active part in next
years campaign against Gov. Blease
or any other candidate. The indica-
tions are that the Senator will be
ent ba,k to Washington without op-
position. Therefore, he should be
hands off.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Those OF US who are qualified to
vote in tho municipal election next
Tuesday sh ould study the candidates
who have announced themselves, and
try an picl out those who will best
serve the city as Mayor an Aldermen.
Vote for tie best man, regardless OF
likes and iislikeS. "a.. .,.--.- -.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Gov. Blea.Ie seems to be sanguine
of reelection no matter who opposes
him. This laay be so but the Cover
nor had be- ter not holler too loud
unit ihel gset drhul sesaBow, ,oPaba
until he get; out Of the woods.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

Gov. .Fo,s of Massachusetts, says
the tariff commission on which the
president Will base his recommends
tions for revision is nothing more
than bod" of clerks and absolutely
without power. It Is not for the
Democrats 10 attack President Taft.
The Republicans will show him up.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-09-05

President Taft says that the wool
and cotton schedules are indefensi-
BILE, yet he 6 ttacks the Democrats for
attempting 20 remedy the situation.
After the next election President
Taft will e. numbered among the
has-bs ems.