davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
This One Is on Huu1.

when I came into the Union sta.
tion the other morning, after travelling
all night said Hugh Reilly, at the
Commercial club" went into the bar
Der shop. When you spend ne night
in sleeping car said to the barber,
1T doesn't improve your personal ap
pearance, does ito
Well said he, as he loked mo
over, ! don't know how you looked
when you started, but perhaps you're
right. Washington Herald.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
HUMOROUS QUlPs

There was terrible noise coming
from the dining room and the fond
mother. alarmed, rushed swiftly in.
On the floor her son, aged ten, was
going through all manner of contor.
tions-somersaults, both backward and
forward; bang. bang, he went.
Willie Willie" cried his mother,
what are you doing? You'll"
For a moment Willie paused In his
gymnastics.
M "Oh, Its all right, mother" he gasp
ca. You see, I forgot to shake my
medicine before taking it--like you al
ways told me to do. SO I thought I'd
shake myself up, as the medicine was
inside me!'--New York Globe.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

The illustration shows useful rag
Ian coat for girl, just the thing need
ed for going TO and from school dur
ing the winter; it is carried out in
cravenette, so it is waterproof with
out being heavy or too warm OF
course, if preferred. it could be made
Ia tweed, serge or cloth.
The hat is dark green with small
feather mount at the side.
Material required for the coat; Two
and one-half yards AS inches wide.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
Footwear Extravsaanee.

You cannot economiae on your feet
this season when they are so much in
evidence, therefore every woman will
have to take UP the two subjects to-
yether--the kind Of suit she buys and
The kind of sLoes she will get to 80
with tho suit. ;
Practical. s.
Friend Lock here! There Is moth.
ing in the love Of this young heircss
for you.
ChanffeurOh. yes. there is. There's
millions In II.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

TIE POET PHILOSOPHER

TIE Queen great .trcss a puddle her
stopped "Il all
spashcd with cay!' And thon
an OLD STORY boke his
cregn's feet; dry
lcvhoopiug the street
her slight and acted Johnnie small came
lasting and is nbalmed poets
their
like labor They their
oN8 apd MIXED their dug their wells
Tyre Ia hit throws balmnG aborcrs like They
had eir
The writes
It's still the
stand and tcie o'rcre
they d advertise.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Once a little doubling duckllng
stood beside a puddle pond,
Cooked an eye. and looked beyond
said to him. as he stood there,
Half afraid to venture in,
While his wee pin feathers tremblcd
All along his prickly skin:
!, prithec. art thou Balboa,
FA rfTtthy pond alniwhty ocean,
surAR 1ittlc fluffy Psychc,
with thy dowiiy wings in motioa7"
Paddle in, thuo ducky daddlcs.
Far be II from me to say @
'Whethcr Loves a great adventure
Or a rain pool by the way.
~--aena Cary Sheffield in January
Ainslces,
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
On, Ey Presidents.

VIVA, win Mr.. T4rr do II dtfeatea
for reelection? The question nr5
been Often asked Of hate We pre-
sume lha5 he viii return 70 tpc pTael
tice OF law, for which he isE lsre-
omiucutly fitted Our oX-presidcsta
have never Quit active work aftet
leaving their nigh place There 81
no harder worGer todoy tlan4 Mr.,
Roosevelt Nj Cleveland prae tjcc
law af;cr his defeat in 1898, and M
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

1t Is right and just that Russia
should respectable passports of our
Jewish citizen*Nbut what puzzles us
IL this: After getting out Of Russia.
why does any Amcricanized Jew ever
want to go back? inquired the Mem
rhis Commercial-Appeal. Possibly
fer the same reason that the thcat-
Meal Star deserts the, Great White
Way to return TO Tanktown--to
chow or hen good cl9Ihes.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Twelve couples out of every 100
get divorced within twenty years Of
the marriage day, according to the
Baltimore American. Well that isn't
so bad.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

trees have been placed on the mar
ket fiji the United States, is strong
evidence that there will be at least
four million happy kidlets in this
country three days from now.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
Usual System.

Magazine Editor--This Is a spler.
did story, but never heard of the au'
thor before, did you?
Assistant-Never. Shall | send II
back?
Magazine Editor--No. Put 1t away
until lie becomes famous.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
> Neclected opportunity,

The most and his visitor were walk
ing IN the evening in the street where
most Of the electric signs are display
ed. once the visitor stopped.
"What is TT" asked the host.
There's one without sign on It,"
he visitor said
The host looked, too. "Sure
enough" he agreed That's tho
noon"
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
hektoaraph Ink.

Hektograph or copying pad Ink Is
made as follows: Dissolve one part
methyl-violct in eight parts water, and
odd one part glycerinc Gently warm
he solution for an hour. ard when
DOL, add a quarter part alcohol. Or
axe methy'-vole,. one part. ~a'er
sfcn parts. glycefine, two parts
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Fresh mush is the best dish ever
invented, declared James A, Patton,
former king OF the wheat pit, sew
eral days ago in Chicago. Mr. Pat
ton may be contemplating corner
of'the mash market, but who cares?
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

If Uncle Sam does not use great
deal Of diplomacy in handling that
treaty matter, Russia will not permit
any more OF It's paupers and an
archists to immigrate to this country
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

A woman who claimed to be f07
yearsold died at Elizabethtown, Ky,
tho other day. Dispatches fail to
state whether or not she smoked a
pine, which leaves us in doubt as to
the exact cause of her death.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
November Circulation.

of the circulation of The Cairo
Bulletin for the year 1910 and for
the month Of November. 1911.
CLYDE SULLIVAN,
Business Manager.
Subscribed and sworn to before
i me this sixth day of December, 191 \
LEO ]. KLEBs {.
(Seal) Notary Public.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
a tiorrid SUSPICION,

"Why do men persist in holding up
the Venus OF Milo as the model Of
womanly perfection?"
Huh. Because If women were
like her, they couldn't rake things so
much in their own hands"
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
A EorcefuI STYLE.

II found ont The farmer We are
boarding with pens stray article
now and then"
You dent say! What are his chief
subjects
Wandering pigs, OF course"
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
On the safe Side.

You'll be late for supper, sonny"
'sid q merchant IN passing small
boy who was carrying a package.
INC, wont,"was the reply. i've
aot dc meat. '--Lippincott's,
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

A dispatch states that General Nor
ales, former president of Santo Do
miago, may be shot. We hope he is
not more than half shot.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

If the predictions of certain po-
ltical experts do not miscarry Presi-
dent Taft will make his next Western
trip as Mr. Taft.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
Too Much So.

"Mrs Gamely is said to have such
winning ways as a hostess"
$50 she has winning ways, That's
why had to stop going to her bridge
PARTIES"
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

One dollar and fifty cents per
thousand cubic feet is pretty stiff
price to pay for gas that neither
heats or Eliminates.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Nat Goodwin will have to pay his
divorced wife, Edna Goodrich. 500
600 alimony. 1t appears as If Nat
was divorced more from his money
A@ ~ @rsS
than his wife. @z
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
MORALITY AND LOVE.

The one thing that is pro-
foundly linked with morality isl9
! love. RS morality do not mean
onr respects biiities, our little
conventions OF conduct which
are. not the same beyond tie
pyrenees." 1t is not morality
that prevents Hindu from eat
ing meat. an Egyptian from kill
ing n beetle. n Nazarite from
cutting his hair. Puritan from
singing q love ditty. MOham
medan from putting picture in
his church. a Methodist from
PLAYING whist or an ecclesiastic
r. from marrying wife. These
! things may be all useful enough.
y pefliaps. hut they are matters
OF Discipline, not morals I'y
ssmaFality mean that control
over ores own acts and pas
sions which Is undertaken In
the interests of the higher part
of human nature, that self direc-
tion which is intended to make
US more humane. more loyal and
more reverent, toward ourselves
and toward others, That which
is the electric current, which
normally works in US higher
kind Of life. is love. and love
alone. Commandments, prohibit
tions. rules and all cold COM
pulsions. whether from oneself
or from another, af&auite apt to
be disastrous AlQS&iity IL pre-
cisely what the NH could not
do"-Dr. FRANC Crane.
ssA
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
CIRCULATION STATEMENT

Average number of complete
and perfect copies of The
Cairo Bulletin printed
8.ldaily and Sunday during
the year 1910. ......... 228.
Average number Of complete
and perfect copies Of The
Cairo Bulletin printed
daily and Sunday during
the month Of November,
1e11 222,
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

This will be a great day for care
less persons who put off their Chrits-
mas shopping till the last moment.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

VI aonears rs II Pastor Picheeon
.tsjsa TO take the law in his own
hands and made a poor job of It,
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Shady Beud, Of the tar-party fame.
wants to change its name. Any other
name would be inappropriate.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

While there is an excuse left for
writing q presidential message there
is hope.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Just one more payday left and it's
spent already
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
Do You, Now?

Here's some lively news to see:
Cheaper gas for Chlcopee,"
Evidently, from your pliz.
You don't know whore that town is.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Pretty soon ell will be over, expect
paying the bills. q
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Mrs. Gusshur-Oh! | adore paint
ings! Which is the greatest work o.
art,
Orrville Dauber--S Selling my paint.
ings, madam,
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
Grestcs, n A.n Mlna.

The only pecpe "h, ~ es n
9ssd nit Is the sica,rSl 3at ia sM
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

when the attention Of The Bul-
letin is called to any misstatemenf
of fact or to any error concerning
any man or thing, corrections viii
cheerfully be made.)
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
me kETCHEN
I|.2s1G7ABENET
M F J were ss$ed{veat sss De

auap4aad wefan. | woAld$saY. Ror errors
f1'A' diet, N76t lack ofrExstcise. Snot over
work, nor corsets, nor any OF these, but
bad mental habits. Fear. anger. worry.
regret. irritability, envy jealousy, lack OF
trust In ones self and IN the great Cod
eli these are had mental states which de-
stroY beauty not only ny interfering
with the action OF the vital organs, but
nv directly dsaguring the expression OF
the face. Outing.
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

Haze you hung up the mistGetoe,
sister? Sfi ~ ~ . "a
VA ~
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

When syoNnsf son asks you howSie'
IL that santa Claus can descend an
the chimncys In the United States
at one time, It is a. sure sign that he
Is goink 10 shayc a, different opinion.
OF the ola BOY this time next year. \
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23
He Simply Can't.

How can p wight
Feel hale and hearty,
When he's spent the night
At a poker party?
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

sTnc Bulletins SaEa Claus cam
paign for the Youngsters at the chill
drcns Home viii CLOSE tomorrow
night, II your list has not been col
leAtedsryou viii confer great favor
uron tho Fund Editor by sending 1t
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

News that four million Christmas
The Cairo bulletin., 1911-12-23

BE sure your stocking has no hole
in it.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18

opened as the spring does open in
Richmond. with sudden glory OF
green leaves. magnolia blooms and
flowers among the grass. our spirits
rose after the depression of the later
months. If only to shake of the at
mosphere of doubts and fears engen-
dered by the long winter of disaster
and uncertainty the coming activity or
arms was welcome, | shall not attempt
to describe the rapidity with which
thrilling excitements succeeded one an
other in our experiences in this house.
The gathering of many troops around
the town filled the streets with con-
tinually moving panorama of war. ana
we spent our time in greeting. cheer
ing. choking with sudden emotion and
quivering in anticipation of what was
yet TO follow.
We had finished several battle flags,
and one of them was bestowed upon
the washington Artillery of New
Orleans. a body of admirable soldiers
who had Weakened TO enthusiasm the
daughters of Virginia in proportion, l
dare say. TO the woe they had created
among the daughters of Louisiana in
bidding them goodbye. One morning an
orderly arrived to request that the
ladies would be out upon the veranda
at given -lour; and, punctual to the
time fixed. the travel-stained battalion
filed past our house.
These We're no holiday soldiers Their
gold was furnished and their scarlet
faded by sun and wind and gallant
service-they were veterans how on
their way TO the front. where the cal
of duty never failed to find the flower of
Louisiana As they came in line with
us the officers saluted with their swords,
the band struck Up My Maryland" the
tired soldiers sitting upon the caissons
that dragged heavily through the muddy
street set up a rouSinS cheer. And there
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18
COncelhin
Well-known People.
More PaIatabIe.

THOMAS w. LAWSON at a dinner ia
Boston said OF far-famed finan-
cier:
He is all right at heart. but his out
side is prickly. and you must handle him
with great caution as they handled the
Tin Can gambler.
"A gambler of Tin Can borrowed
sum from a money lender and when the
note fell due he said he could not settle.
You must settle shouted the money
lender. IF you don't settle I'll
But the gambler. taking a revolver
from his boot. pointed II at the money
lender and said
Eat that note or I'll let daylight
through YOU,
And the money lender. after a mo
ment's silent thought, crumpled the note
into ball. put il in his mouth. chewed
vigorously and then. with a gulp, swal-
lowed the pulpy morsel.
That dose saved your life. said the
gambler. in "A Modified tone. and the next
day he had "A streak of luck and paid the
money lender in full
The money lender was much pleased
with this honesty, and when the gambler
a few weeks later called and asked for A
new loan he was readily accommodated.
The gambler. having pocketed the
new loan. sat down. dipped pen in the
ink and selected a sheet &C paper. where
on to write the usual Acknowledgement.
But the money lender hastily interposed.
Hold on. my friend, he said, and he
ran To a cupboard.
Wait a minute my friend. Would
you mind writing 1t on this soda crack
err? !"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18

burning ships and steamers and bales or
cotton along the levee made a huge
crescent of fire. Keeping just aheao OIL
the enemy's fleet. they reached Vicks-
burg and thence went overland to MO
bile, where their charge was gwen up
in safety.
And now we come to the 31st of May,
1862 when the eyes of the whole con-
tinent turned to Richmond. On that day
Johnson assaulted the Federals who had
been advanced TO Seven Pines ito within
sight of the steeples of the Confederate
capital In face of recent reverses tfork-
town and WILLIAMSBURG, we in Rfchmond
had begun to feel like the prisoner or
the Inquisitlon in Poe's story. cast INTO
dungeon of slowly contracting walls.
With the sound of guns. therefore, in the
direction of Seven Pines. every heart
leaped as If deliverance were a hand.
And yet there was no joy in the wild pull
sation. since those to whom we looked
for succor were our own flesh and blood.
barring the way 10 foe of superior num-
bers, abundantly provided. as we We're
not, with all the equipments OF modern
warfare. and backed by a mighty ma
ton as determined as ourselves to win.
Hardly a family in the town whose ia
Their son or brother was not part and
parcel of the defending army
When on the afternoon Of the 3lst It
became known that the engagement had
begun. the women of Richmond were
still going about their daily vocations
quietly. giving no sign of the inward
anguish Of apprehension There was
enough to do now in preparation for
the wounded; yet. as events proved. all
that was done was not enough by half.
Night brought a lull in the cannonading.
People lay down dressed upon beds, but
not to sleep, while the weary soldiers
Early next morning the whole town
was on the street. Ambulances, filters,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18

de ST Martin. the brother-in-law OF Mr..
Judah p. Benjamin uhe secretary OF
state) merely shrugged his shoulders,
with a thoroughly characteristic gesture,
making no remark.
This must affect your interests, some
one said to him nqurngly.
Il am ruined. VOLTA tout was the re-
joinder-and this was soon confirmed
This debonair little gentleman was one
OF the greatest favorites of our war
society in Richmond. His cheerfuness.
his wit his exquisite courtesy. made him
friends everywhere. and although his
nicely of dress. after the pattern OF
the boulevardier fni of Paris, was the
subject of much wonderment to the popu-
lace when he first appeared upon the
streets, it did not prevent him from join
ing the volunteers before Richmond
when occa sion called. and roughng il in
the trenches like veteran. His cheer
full endurance of hardship during freez
ing winter of camp life became a proverb
in the army later in the siege.
For a time nothing was talked of but
the capture of New Orleans. OF the
midshpman, my brother we heard that
on the day previous TO the taking of
the forts Jackson and st. Philip which
guarded the approach 10 New Orleans
from the gulf, after several days bonn
bardment of the United States fleet under
Flag officer Farragut. he had been sent
in charge of ordnance and deserterS TO
a Confederate vessel in the river: that
Lieut.. R friend of his. on the way
70 report at Fort Jackson during the hot
Smelling. had invited the lad to accom-
pany him by way of pleasure trip.
that while they were crossing the moat
around Fort Jackson, in a canoe, and
under heavy fire, thirteen-inch mortar
shell had struck the water near, half
filling their craft, and that. after watch
ing the fire from this point for an hour,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18
Mrs. Newed's Quandary.
rAYOR RICE at June wedding IN
lvl New Haven told an appropriate

NHAYOR RICE at a June wedding III
Vl New Haven told an appropriate
story:
"All these young ladies here. he SAID
will be married some day. they VIII
ALI some day-for race suicide is the
thing no longer-be in the quandary oil
Mrs. Viewed. Let them not. however
emulate her.
Mrs Viewed sat one day In pubic
library turning over the leaves OF the
directory. An old gentleman entered. He.
too. wanted to consult the directory,
and he frowned on seeing Ii in use. Then
he began to pace the floor impatiently
Two or three other persons entered.
They also wanted the directory, but
Mrs Viewed still continued to turn the
leaves. "
Finally a business man entered he
looked at Mrs. Viewed and at the line OF
waiting people, and, taking in the situa-
ton at a glance, he approached the young
woman and said. politely:
Pardon me, but /, as business man,
am accustomed to consulting the direc-
tory almost daily. l perceive you are a
novice, madam. Let me help You IN
your search
".Ah, thank YOU said Mrs. Viewed,
and with a smile and look of RELIEF
she surrendered the huge volume. THANK
you ever so much. sir. | am trying 10
find nice name for my baby.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18

Special Correspondence OF the star
LNDON. June 10. 1911.
X MILITARY society in London is hav-
Nl ing a good deal of quiet fun just
now over the arrangements for horsing
the military personages. and especially
the country magnates who are honorary
colonies of territorial regiments AT the
coronation. All these worthy colonies
have been appointed special aios-oe.
camp TO the king and have been notlheo
that they must ride in the royal process
sions on the day of the great ceremony
itself and the following day, "hen 'ne
king and queen make state progress
through London.
Accommodating this notice was an mt
nation that they should INFORM 'he
nroper authorities whether they proposed
TO furnish their own mounts OF whe'i l
they desired horses to be PROVIDED lot
them In the latter case they are asked
IN eynress their preference for a morse Oh
one of the following three classes:
A. Trooper.
r. Quiet trooper
L. Very quiet trooper
Now those personages who are coioneis OF
veomanry regiments are accustomed 10
riding of course, but many OF the coio-
neIs of infantry regiments 90 not hnoM
much about horses. Some or them nave
boon accustomed to appear at reviews
and similar functions on nags warranted
blind. deaf and spiritless by the local
livery stable from which they were hired,
and guaranteed not to go faster ,han
walk for anything less than lSuulte
she'll exploded under them. Even then
some of the riders have experienced great
difficultv in refraining from hanging on 10
the names of their chargers IN 100 con-
SpicuouS manner
In snite of all this the writer is told that
the demand for very quiet troopers" has
been Surprisingly small. The reason
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-06-18

suhterranean passages and CROWDED 10 i.s
limits with refugees like ourselves from
country homes within or near the enemy
Nnes-or 'fugees," as we were all caiieo'
For want of any common sitting room
we took possession of what had been
DOCTORS office. few steps distant down
the billy street, fitting ii up TO the best
Of our ability: and there We received our
friends, passing many merry hours In
rainy weather we reached II py an unuer-
ground passageway from the hotel, an
alley through the catacombs: and many
a dignitary of camp or state will recall
those Clifton evenings.
Already the pinch of war was felt In
the commissariat, and we had recourse
occasionally 10 a contribution supper, or
Dutch treat, when the guests prought
branded peaches, boxes OF sardines,
French prunes and bags of biscuit, while
the hosts contributed only roast turkey
or ham, with knives and forks. Demo-
cratic feasts those were. where major
generals and high privates met on an
equal footing. The hospitable old town
was crowded with the families of officers
and members of the government. One
house was made TO do the work of sew
eral. many of the wealthy citizens gener-
ously giving up their superfuous space to
receive the newcomers.
The only public event OF note was the
Inauguration of Mr. Davis as president
of the permanent government of the
Confederate states, which We viewed
from one OF the windows of the capitol.
where. while waiting for the exercises 10
begin. we read northern papers, the lat
est per underground express.
That I'D of February was day OF
pouring rain. and the concourse of UNI
brellas in the square beneath us had
the effect of an immense mushroom bed.
As the bishop and the president-elect
came upon the stand there was an al
most painful hush In the crowd. All
seemed TO feel the gravity of the trust
our chosen leader was assuming. When
he kissed the Book shout went up:
but there was no elation visible as the
people slowly dispersed. And il was
thought ominous afterward. when the
story was repeated. that, as Mrs. Davis
who had a Virginia negro fer coach
man, was driven To tie inauguration.
she observed the carriage went 1T a
snai"S .aec and was escorted ~ four