davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Fortunes in Chicken Farming?

upon the thoroughbred inmates. while
glass or muslin screens regulate the tenn
perature and ventilate the place The
roosts are almost cabinet work, the floors
of concrete and the furniture, in the way
of trap nests, water fountains, hovers,
etc.-all listed in the catalogues at repre-
hensible prices-is palatlal
THE incubator relieves the hen from all
home cares to exploit her in the business
line" says the wife. There really ought
to be a Hens unions. with hack to the
nest!' for its motto. Think of those lovely,
enhancing little yellow chicks-their own
little chicks-and they never get one of
them under their wings And half the tiny
chicks die too-at least Toms do
why Toms brain isn't added by read.
ing poultry books | don't know They
are his favorite works OF fiction, and each
one contradicts the other and is more
sensational than the last"
The mature heroine does not exist in
this class of farm-yard fiction. From the
egg to the market the modern hen has
but two years allotted to her span AS
pullet in her first winter she is cherished
and admired, but after her second sum
mer, having run her little race from
debutante to dowager,. she is either fat
tened for the table or sold off to the un-
wary novice who is looking for thorough
bred stock. The days OF the mother hen,
the comfortable. important creature sur
rounded by the chirping broods, are over.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
LO the Pure Puritan!

New England conscience mounted in life
like way on the crotch OF an ancient elm,
moulting in the glass case OF a museum?
We drop the tear Of sentiment upon the
lndian-nOw that he is not near enough to
return our courtesy with the tomahawk-
let us now call a meeting and weep for the
Puritan. So scarce Is the pure Puritan be-
coming that the next generation may feel
few salt drops trimming to their eyes
when some wintry day they see the bluff
old-back-country farmer sleighing to town.
tucked in rare warm robe of Puritan
hide-the last OF his race slain b. American
laughter the cruelest weapon ever aimed
at a brothers breast!
Why not grant this rock-walled field of
New England to the Puritan for his reser-
vation-a mental reservation. perhaps-but
always happy, hunting ground for him
and his conscience, before he and il. too.
meet with extinction in the fiashlight OF
humor?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

perhaps l would never marry. / might
be an old maid. sort of hoped that he
wouldn't agree with me, as the prospect
didn't sound attractive. He answered me,
however that II wasn't a bit likely. He
said sooner than let me become an old
maid he'd marry me himself Johnnie's so
sweet l couldn't thank him enough be-
cause he is really awfully good looking
and would make a very nice husband He
said not to bother about thanking him,
though. He has the most generous dis
position-I can see that-and I've noticed
that he is most affectionate. But to re-
turn TO my real husband I first saw
him I'm a restaurant about two weeks ago.
We we're having supper after the theater
in the grill room downstairs He sat at a
table quite near us and kept looking at
me all the time, / couldn't help noticing
a little bit out OF the corner Of one Of
my eyes. Then once ! turned around to
10 look at the decoration on the wall-the
decorations are really beautiful in that
hotel-and l accidentally happened to notice
that he was looking in my direction very
intently. Johnnie had just been saying
something very witty and / had dread
ful feeling after I had turned back again
that / must have still been smiling at what
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Her Husbands Voice Little HOmily on the Delicate Art
= nv nStrPE MN Of Shopping
BY AMERE MAN.

Don't you want me to write II down for
you2', asked the Amateur Wife, as she
stood In the doorway Of her suburban
home
What fore" the Post Graduate Husband
asked. I'm not so addle Drained that I
can't remember yOn want pink ribbon. Be
sides" be added mournfully, while man
may submit secretly TO the ignominy Of
doing his wifes shopping. he doesn't want
to have documentary evidence OF his shame
found on him IL he should happen to drop
dead"
Now, you know I have a headache and
can't 90 myself" protested His Wife.
And i've never asked you to shop for me
before! Are you sure that you can re-
member want five yards Of pink satin
ribbon about three and one-hah or four
inches vide ] simply have to have II II
I'm going 20 that reception tomorrow"
:. why. Of course. I'll remember it," Her
Husband answered and then hearing the
warning whistle % his approaching train,
he spirited for the station.
II was 3 o'clock in the afternoon before
he thought of the pink ribbon again. He
had been ont 10 lunch with an 01d school
mate from up state and in pleasing remin-
iscences Of how one OF them had received
the high school medal for elocution and the
ether had stolen the preachers wig, they
had passed two delightful hours. But upon
his .ret0fh TO the office a croquettish pink
bow in the telephone operators rudy hair
reminded, him OF his wifes commission.
He gritted his teeth, put on his hat and
Sailed forth 10 a large dry goods estab-
lishment across the square.
The big doors swung wide, and as the
Post Graduate Husband crossed it's stately
must have felt when they lifted their eyes
To the fatal sentence: IAN hope abandon
We who enter hereP'
Women. crowding around bargain coun-
tiers, jostled him cut OF the way.
Idle, saleswOmen, adjusting lead pencils
in their covering ooiffures, stared super.
ciliousIy Q .r-
a burly person, whom he suspected OF
being the store detective, seemed to be fol
lowing him about.
Where 40 you buy ribbon" he asked in
a sudden panic, and the young duchess he
addressed stopped chewing gum lone
enough to say with plying smile:
AT the ribbon counter-four aisles over
and two TO the left-then ask the floor
walker
: tt was that or some similarly cabalistlC
utterance. for at this point the Post Grad
uate Husbands recollection begun to be
distinctly vague
He followed the instructions he had re-
ceived-or at least he thought he did-and
wound up at the womens hosiery depart
ment. .-.r.ar s...
eoumiserating saleswoman gave him q
ciew which led him to a bargain table Of
crockery. III. ase
Az last in despair and disgust he turned
toward the front door and on his wa,
there perceived a hundred shades anC
varieties OF ribbon fluttering from the bat
Elements OF the ribbon counter.
Immediately the six Czarinas who pre-
sided there became studIously unaware o
his existence They seemed instinctively
to know that he had not been trained il
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Contentment a Boom to Humanity

elbow Breat hoon to, human life is con-
tentment9 And. lucky are they who have
acqaiFe II and who show the repose Of
manner which proclaims the acquisition to
jaded world.
> In this latter day struggle for wealth
power and greatness of all degrees. the
beautiful repose and simplicity that char
actsrized- our distinguished foreparents has
been trampled under foot
The old fashioned chivalry for women
and the courtesy that was shown In the
home life 10 one another; the love and pa
thence that were given to the wants Of old
people, and the strict modes of bringing
up the children Qoo strict. modern mothers
may, think, made the last generation one
OF mighty fine men and women, say 1,
while the results OF todays teachings are
still decidedly problematical.
However, this may be, contentment seems
TO have been lost In the evolution OF the
passing yeats, and no reward has been
offered verify consistent search for it,
more's the pity
Bot the men, women or children who
have caught a gllmmering shadow OF it
ARE continual feast to their friends, who
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Rnhien non,t Count.

A little girl in Washington had been
hearing her parents discuss the high price
OF meats and vegetables. 1t had been a
frequent topic at the table, and the child
has been heard to refer to the high cost
of living" while playing house" with the
little girls of the neighborhood.
Recently the mother of this youngster
presented the family with a bouncing baby
boy. a circumstance that greatly pleased
the child. While discussing the new
ccmer she was overheard to say to her
brother:
Wasn't mamma good to buy such big
baby when meat is so high?"-Every-
bOdy's
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
cSSt " Fu-s ossv HSt Hq.S eSas'h
An ntlasssSvSA

he had said while looking at the decora-
ton on the wall. Although it was little
in his direction I do 5hope 10 goodness he
didn't imagine-oh. bat of course he
wouldn't have dared! However, you never
can tell what men WIFI think. They have
such evil minds Anyway, to be on the
safe side / put on a frightfully severe,
stern expression and leaned over and
talked to Johnnie though 1 was very
much in love with him. l turned around
ever so little about five minutes afterward
to look at the gown woman was wearing
who had just come in and couldn't help
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

So many of our interesting American
fauna have met with extinction that feel
like entering a plea for the Puritan. We
think now with regret OF the long-gone
bison herd charging in a cloud OF dust
upon the unwary western traveller and ef-
,fectuaI Bu preventing his ever writing book
20 travel We could almost weep when we
see this terror wired into some wayside
park. -.... ..- ..s
shall we not shed few OF the unwept
tears we ! ad reserved for the buffalo when
We Wow the last OF the Puritans analyzing
the bars or his cage at the zoo? Or when
we gaze upon the stuffed specimen Of the
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

at that decoration again to see some more
Of the details. but as the creature might
thnk-well, decided not to. When we
went out and were getting our wraps and
things, 1 peeked back through the door
way a little and he was standing up and
drinking my health. He did look so cum
ming and silly, and as we were going right
out, and, of course, I'd never see him
again, l looked at him and smiled-in-
finitesimally. He was so pleased and sur
prised After all, my smiles are my own,
and il l wanted TO give him a quarter Of
one l could. We went out then and l
couldn't help wishing l had been having
supper with him. I'm sure We would have
got on splendidly. l believe we both have
a great many ideas in common. And today
when / was looking down from the top
of the bus / saw him walking along the
street. lie looked up and saw me and
stopped, ! wanted to shout out "Hellov'
1t seemed too mean that I couldn't just be
cause somebody hadn't mumbled our names
10 each other. The bus bumped along and
/ looked back little bit over my shoulder
and he still standing looking after it,
turned around so quickly / nearly dis
located my neck | hope he doesn't think
he certainly is good looking. lie had on
the smartest overcoat 1t can be very
exciting meeting people you know but it
can be still more so meeting people you
don't know.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

Saw him today from the top of bus. l
was so thrilled I nearly fell off the seat.
Perhaps he is my husband! This mys-
FERROUS being that l am to marry exists
somewhere and do wish 1 could hurry
up and meet him l should like to know
what he is like. They all talk of him as
a dead certainty and, naturally, 1 feel
very much interested. Cousin Anne is con-
stantly saying, when you are married,
my dear" and they all refer to the event
frequently / said to Johnnie once that
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

closing his opinion, the case resolved itself
into a question OF whether the ordinance
declaring hogs a NUISANCE was reasonable.
The court held that II was unreasonable.
Hogs are animals, said the Judge, and II
one animal Is a nuisance per Sc, It follows
that all are. Man is an animal, he said,
and would therefore be nuisance The
judge added that many men are unmiti-
gated nuisances, but that such exceptions
did not make a general rule
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

seeing that the creature-I mean the man
was still staring at me. 1t is simply dis
gushing the way one is positively perse-
cuted at times. But gracious! the idiot
was attractive looking! He had a SPLEEN
did figure and when the music started
again and they played that wonderful new
waltz would have loved to have had a. look
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
wisdom and Folly.

The man who's always happy
Is envied as a rule,
Sometimes he's a philosopher
And sometimes he's a fool
This life's like parlor magic
And oftentimes the fun
Depends upon not knowing bow
The various tricks are done.
IL isn't near so bad
To be unlearned and happy,
As 70 be wise ana sad.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Hnrh. CrneI NNnrId.

Mrs Crawford-You can have all the
bread and butter you want, but no more
cake.
Willie-say, Ma how is it / can never
have second helping of any Of the things
/ like2-Lippincotts
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
MIse Gil.

Henrietta said the sern-faced father
in tone that scintillated with sarcasm,
that yOung man Grinsum has been here
three nights in succession, and he does not
20 until midnight and after. I think YOU
mad better invite the fellow to bring his
trunk and make his home here"
oh you dear papa" cried the girl.
with innocent JOY. May 1? Oh. won't that
he lovely Il was just what he wanted but
he was too bashfJh 20 ask YOU Oh. but
won't ne be just too delighted when / tell
him this evening""
And he wGs-nOt. -L4ppineottL
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Daily Health Hint

one man claims that his good health is
mainly attributable 10 the fact that he
keeps his head cool and his feet dry.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07

The good die younger else outgroW H.
IT is we'll to bear in mind that all things
wait for those who go after them.
1t is Just as well to be lenient with the
faults of those who are bigger than We
are.
It's all right to learn TO say no, but 1t
has made many an old maid
Some fellows are actually too lazy even
to brag about how they used to work,
If ignorance were really bliss the work
would be much happier
Adam at least couldn't lay claim to
being a self-made man.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-02-07
Gentle Cynic's Musings

The good die young-or else outgrow it,
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
OPPOSED TO LOCAL
MUNICIPAL COURT
JEFFERSON AND w TERLOO
PAPERS REGISTER KIBK.
Give as Their Excuse the Matter
OF ExpenSe-The Same, How
ever. Is a Poor One-Interesting
Happenings of the Past Week for
Readers of the Leader.

Assemblyman Viebahn has introduced
bill in the assembly providing for the
establishment of municipal court in
this city, having jurisdiction in both
Jefferson and Dodge counties. The Ban
ner at Jefferson and Democrat at Water
loo objects because of the expense to the
county. The writer has not been in
formed as to the provisions Of the bill,
but should it make provisions for turning
over to the county treasurer all fees
collected, the county would be more than
reimbursed for all expenses OccasiOned
by such court. Then, the fact should
be taken into consideration, that Water
town has a population of 5000 approxi-
mately and is business center and in
need Of local court having larger
Jurisdiction in civil and criminal cases
than permitted in the justice courts. It
would also be great saving to litigants
who now have to 60 to Jefferson at con-
siderable expense and loss of time, even
to the people of Waterloo who are obliged
to settle their difference in court. The
opposition, 1t is presumable, is not so
much the expense as it is to give Water
town municipal court.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Thirty Years TOUether

Thirty years of association-think of
it. How the merit of good thing
stands out in that time-or the worth
lessness of a bad one. So there's no
guesswork in this evidence Of Thos. Ariss
Concord, Mich, who writes: Il haye used
DR.. Kings New Discovery for 80 years,
and it's the best cough and cold cure I ever
used" Once it finds entrance in home
you can't pry it out. Many families
haveused it for 40 years. It's the most in
fallible throat and lung medicine on
earth. Unequaled for lagrippe, asthma,
hay-fever, Group, quinsy or sore lungs.
Price SOC, $1OO. Trial bottle free. Guar
anteed by Chas. A. Gamm.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Will Make improvements.

j. E. Heismann will soon begin the
remOdeling of his store room on Main
street. The floor will be lowered four
teen inches so as to bring it on the level
with the sidewalk, the present front will
be replaced with new one and new
up to date ceiling of galvanized iron
laid in squares with cornaces on the sides.
While the work is in progress, the busi-
ness will be conducted in the Fitzgerald
building On Second street in the rear of
the store of Strauss & Sette, where Mr.
H. will serve his customers.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Play It on his CoTnet

Our friend Charles Wenck will play the
following on his COrnet for his friends:
"Esau Wood sawed wood. Esau Wood
would saw wood. Ali the wood Esau
wood saw Esau Wood would saw. In
other words, all the wood Esau saw to
saw Esau sought to saw. Oh, the wood
Wood would saw, And, Oh the WOOd-saW
with which Wood would saw wood ! But
one day Woods WOOd-saW would saw no
wood, and thus the wood Wood sawed
was not the wood Wood would saw if
Woods WOOd-saW would saw wood. Now
Wood would saw wood with a WOOd-saW
that WOnld saw wood, so Esau sought a
saw that would saw wood. One day
Esau saw saw saw wood as no other
WOOd-saW Wood saw would saw wood.
In fact, of all the Wood-saws Wood ever
saw saw wood Wood never saw wood
saw that would saw wood as the wood saw
Wood saw saw wood, and | never saw a
WOOd-saW that would saw as the wOod-saw
Wood saw would saw until [ saw Esau
Wood saw wood with the wOOd-saW Wood
saw saw wood. Now, Wood saws wood
with the wood saw Wood saw saw wood.''
Mr.. and Mrs. F. B. Schneider spent
Sunday with friends in Milwaukee.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
WdShingtOn'S Birthday

Wednesday, February 22, WashingtOn's
Birthday was generally observed in this
city. The stars and stripes foated from
all of the public and many Of the busi-
ness buildings and old glory was dis
played at quite a number of residences.
One of the attractive decorations, was
in oDe of the front windows OF d. q F..
Kusel, large picture of the Father of
his Country draped with flags. There
were no sessions Of the schools and the
banks were closed.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Farmers, Your Attention!

The Leader has made arrangements
with the management Of the Wisconsin
Farmer, one of the best farm periodicals
in the country, by which the Leader and
Farmer will be sent to each subscriber
to the Leader one year for the sum of
$3.50, the price Of one paper. In order
to take advantage Of this offer all
arrearages must be paid and one year in
advance. Every farmer should avail
themselves Of this opportunity to secure
a home paper and one of the best farm
papers published. If you take it once,
you will not be without it, Remember
only $3.50 for both papers, the regular
price Of one. P. Fl. SWIFT, Publisher.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24

days it is allowed to all, whether in
Lent or outside of that season.
Catholice having attained the suf-
hc1ent use of reason are bound by
law of abstinence. But when it is
either physically or morally impos-
slble to observe the law, or when it
would entail serious difficulties, they
are excused from it.
Sick Are Exempted.
In virtue of the apostolic faculties
granted us by the holy see, We hereby
delegate pastors to dispense, in each
single case, from abstinence the men
actually engaged in thrashing, as we'll
as the farmer families at whose place
thrashing is going on.
Catholics having completed their
twenty-frst year Of age are bound to
fast. But the causes just mentioned
IN regard to abstinence apply also to
the law of fasting. Hence the church
ordinarily exempts from fasting the
sick and those in feeble health
(whether by sickness or old age) ;
women nursing children; all who are
engaged in laborious and exhausting
occupations. Persons in doubt wheth-
er they are excused or not should
consult their confessor or pastor for
advice or dispensation.
AImsgiving Suggested.
In virtue Of the apolistic indult we
permit workingmen and their families
the use of flesh meat at the principal
common meal on all fast days and alb
stinence days throughout the year,
with the exception of all Fridays,
Ash Wednesdays, the Wednesday and
Saturday of holy week and the eve
of Christmas.
Persons excused or dispensed
from the law of fast or abstinence
ought to perform some other good
works Of piety and charity in the
spirit of Christian penance and sane
tifcation. Hence the pious custom
of giving Lenten aims. Redeem
thou thy sins with aims, and thy ini-
quities with works of mercy."-Dan.
iv., "a. Also the custom of abstain
ing from Intoxicating drinks, of stay
ing away from theatres, card parties
and other profane amusements, etc.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Attack Like TIGERS

In fighting to keep the blood pure the
white corpuscles attack disease germs
like tigers. But often germs multiply
SO fast the little fighters are overcome.
Then see pimples, boils, eczema, salt
rheum and sores multiply and strength
and appetite fail. This condition de-
manGs Electric Bitters to regulate stom-
aci, liver and kidneys and to expel poi
sons from the blood. "They are the best
blood purifier" writes c. [. Budahn, of
Tracy, Calf. Il have ever found" They
make rich, red blood, strong nerves and
build up your health. Try them. SOC at
Chas. A. Gamm.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Agents Wanted

A young man or woman who can de-
vote all or part of his or her time driv-
ing through the country and taking ord
ers for an article of value to every farm
er. No investment required. Position per-
manent with an assured good income.
Applicants will please give the names of
three responsible business men for refer
ences as to ability and character and at
the same time state whether you can de-
vote all or part of your time to the work
and what territory you can cover. P. O.
Box 907, Des Moines, Iowa.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24

Teachers Examination

The examination of teachers for Dodge
County, this spring Series 1911, will be
held as follows: Reeseville, Thursday
and Friday, March End and 3rd; Hustis-
ford, Monday and Tuesday, March 9Th
and 7th; Mayville, Wednesday and
Thursday, March, 8th and 9th; Fox Lake,
Friday and Saturday, March, 10th and
ilth; Juneau, Thursday, Friday and
Saturday, May, 25th, 26th and 9th.
Those desiring to take examination
should write to County Superintendent
John Kelley, Juneau, for information.
Watertown leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1909-1911, 1911-02-24
Open Through Service.

Chicago, Feb, 16-Through passen-
ger service from Chicago to the North
Pacific Coast via the Chicago, Milwaukee
and st. Paul and the Chicago. Milwau-
kee and Puget Sound Railways will be
inaugurated on May 28, according to an
nOuncement made today by the officials
of the roads interested.
The inauguration of this service will
make another rans-cOntinental line
from Chicago to the Pacific Coast.
Two all-steel trains-"The Olympian'
and "The COlumbian"-wi be operated
daily in each direction between Chicago
and Seattle and Tacoma.