The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1911-05-25
MADE
RESPECTABLE
By R. w. KEENAN,
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation. 1911.
By R. w. KEENAN,

taken the family silver from the side
board.
IT am about to remove your silver"
"Are you married man."
81 am"
"Children?'
"a boy and girl"
Suppose should break into your
house at night and rob you Of your
children"
Il would kill you.'
"But suppose you were in my pres
ent position and l in yours?"
81 would afterward hunt you down
and kill you"
"That is what society will surely do
to you; it will get you at last and will
punish you"
The burglar looked surprised. He
was not used to having his victims
thus argue with him.
II am not doing this for my own
benefit. l am doing it for my children.
If l didn't they would starve. Indeed.
they were starving when commenced
it, and that is the reason why COM
menced it. Having started in, / must
keep it up"
81 would advise you to drop it."
81 would be glad to take your advice,
for l know well that what you say is
true. But when l drop it the wolf
comes back to the door and he will not
be driven away; he will have all I
love. l can't bear to see them die,
and when they are dead what is the
world to me? The evil day comes, but
by taking your property l may put
it off for some time"
Suppose said the householder,
you could get work and keep it."
"You might as we'll suppose you could
shoot me without getting hurt your
SELF"
you have a terse way of putting
things. You should have been a law
yer"
II am as honest as many of them,
especially those who make fortunes by
telling financial kings how they may
rob the public and keep out of Jail
And l am as honest as some judges
who interpret the law for the benefit
Of these same financial kings"
The man in the pajamas started
"How." continued the burglar, "could
the great robberies of the hundreds Of
millions in the wreckage and absorp-
ton of the small concerns by the large
ones have been accomplished except
by the ruling of these same judges?"
1t was now the turn Of the man in
the pajamas to be impressed.
81 know a lawyer" he said after
some thought, "who will take your
case and serve you as well as these
others have served the big financiers."
81 should have to take your silver
plate to pay his fee. and likely he
would take the fee and let the case
take care Of itself"
HIN! I'm not sure. but that you
would conduct it better than he How
ever, may as we'll pay the fee myself
in money as in my plate, much Of
which consists of heirlooms which I
lawyer is paid. Permit me to call for
the police. Submit to arrest I will
furnish bail, and when you are tried I
will see that you go free. Then will
provide way for you to earn a living
without risk"
The man In the pajamas took it. tele-
phoning to the police, and when they
came they found the burglar covered
with his own weapon. They took him
to the police station and locked him up
for the night. The next morning bail
was furnished by a friend unknown
except to the culprit.
When the burglar was tried he was
astonished to see his friend Of the pa
jamas on the bench. An attorney
arose and. beginning. May it please
your honor" went on to say that he
would prove the prisoner a member
of church and a leader in all good
works: that an alibi would be estab-
lfshed and it would be apparent that
the accused was greatly wronged
man."
And he did.
ANS . SAoNIAy tAC way 0dlu GAS
burglar. 81 should have gone about
the matter myself had I been a lawyer
and conducted my own case'
II told you." said the Judge. that
you had legal talents. You are dis
charged"
AS the burglar passed out a police
man told him that the Judge wished
him to call at his house the same aft
ernoon. The burglar called. and the
judge said to him:
II have kept my word so far and in
tend to keep it further. can't make
you lawyer because you are not
highly enough educated. The next
best thing can do for you is to put
you in Office. am hand in glove with
the political boss. He will make you
one OF his principal heelers. and with
IN year you will be appointed to
position where you will have the care
Of millions Of the peoples money.