Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-07-17

ABoUTM MN
(eOWoW

Joseph Kitchener, of Plane street,
has In the last six weeks become an
ardent fisherman and spends all avail
able time at the fishing banks. But
Joe's knowledge Of fish is still limited,
as the following little tale will illus
trate:
One day this week Joe told a bunch
of friends, including Ferd Ruth, Jesse
Winter. Emil Schultze and Charlie
Charles that he was going fishing the
next day and would bring all Of them
home a mess of the denizens Of the
deep.
In chorus the four said: 1--WE don't
want any fiuke."
Right away Richeimer got mad.
''Fluke," he said scornfully. There
won't be any fiuke about this. When
1 say I am going out to get fish, I get
them"
And it was not until the next night
when Joe brought home a mess OF
thirty-two fiuke that he realized there
T. = 80 --11ed the f1uke, as well as an
I III htiid VI liuhC-d oAobe "o@o 49,
accident.
Frederick r. Freed, chief deputy col
lector of customs, is ar ardent ba5eball
fan. He declares it is the greatest
sport ever and delights in telling the
FLOWING story to illustrate the hold
which the national pastime has upon
the American populace:
81 was in Now York on business one
day while the Russian-Japanese wal
twas in progress. I was riding own
town in the e,oway and we were just
pdlling out Of Fc zenith street when
a newsboy yelled 'Extry! Japs whir
the Russians in a hard battle!'
"The passenC beside me had beer
buried in his evening paper reading the
baseball news and woke up when hi
heard the newsy. He poked his head
through the go window and shouted
What was the scorer"
City Clerk Connolly had his travel
ing bag in his hand, a new Kelly atol
his genial countenance. and he wa
standing IN front Of the ticket widow
of the Central station, asking for
ticket to Asbury Park, just as Alder
man Schmidt canie along.
The alderman heard the request TO
the ticket, in fact lad known the da.
before that the city clerk was goini
to the shore for tn weekend, but tn
"foolish-question'' bug had him, and h
asked:
Going to Asbury Park to escape tn
keat. 1 suppose?"
at isn't the heat 1 mind" reptile
the city clerk, tits the Internal nois
you fellows make about it. I haven
!, net a nan on the street today bu
didn't ask me II it was hot enough I
suit me. I'm going to get into a BATH
/ ing suit and if anybody asks he tha
again I'll duck him in the Atlantic"
s
Last Wednesday an agent entere
the Third precinct police station an
walked to the desk where Sergear
Luke Forsyth was on duty. After ash
ing a few questions the agent pulle
a pencil from his pocket and started
jot down notes. Immediately Luke M
|, ticed that the pencil was orange-co
ored. Hold on, young fellow" he sal
you'll have to put that pencil ava
Nothing orange is allowed here {
| July 49,"
, The agent looked at the sergeant ar
! then took up another pencil.
M. ]. Boice, manager OF one of Il
, leading local ice plants, says the on
thing wrong with the ice business
that you haven't any spare time for
vacation.
I'm summer they keep you so infe
4 nally busy playing tennis with supp
9 and demand hat you haven't time
+. think about a rest, much less to g
one; and in winter you've got to ke'
on the jump storing ice from the ma
ar Il supply. How'd you like to be Il
Q ice man?' is a question with mo
a than one side to it."