Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-02-01
Salt on the Bird 7 all
Story Of NIardi Gras
Masquerade
By SAMUEL E. BRANT
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation, 1911.
Who is the biggest fool you ever
By SAMUEL E. BRAN

Woman"
The girl I'm engaged to-"
Well, l like that. What kind Of
vie do you expect her to make"
How should l know her qualifca-
tiols for wife? Marriage is q lottery
otter men may marry for qualifca-
tiois, but we youngsters don't pretend
to 'orecast what girls going to be.
And I don't believe the old ones hit it
any better than we"
What makes you set your fancee
down as a fool?'
III tell you. but I must begin back
a little way She's Madge Whitridge,
only it should be Madge Wildfire in
stead, Not that she is so wild as she
was. She's been quoted down bit by
a ce'tain little happening that came
near resulting disasuously. She near
" caused my death"
You don't mean it, Not intention
ally, suppose"
We'll, whether there was a spark of
IlJu III IL dOII hION' ACu hChNL
can tell what q woman is going to do
or way she does it. We can't be sure
she knows herself. If Madge had
caused my death any prosecuting at
torney might have made very good
case against her of doing it with NAL
ice aforethought And to tell the truth
I'm not sure but she did"
And you're going to marry herT'
You bet-that is, if she doesn't shake
me for another fellow, though l don't
think she would do that now. She
might have done it before this thing
I'm going to tell you about happened;
but, as l said, it sobered her, and she's
quite tame That's the time | chose for
putting salt on the birds tail
There's more appropriateness III
this simile than you may imagine. as
you'll see in a moment. But for the
incident. We floor gliders,' as one
called our dancing club of yOung peo-
ple-there was not one over twenty,
and some Of the girls weren't over fif-
teen-concluded we'd celebrate the
Mardi Gras with a masquerade ball. Id
been getting sweet on Madge-Wildhre
l may as well call her-and about the
time the costumes were being arrang-
ed | was sitting up to her like Il sick
kitten to a warm brick. In fact, we
arranged to have corresponding cos
tunes for the ball.
"This was after Rostand's play Of
'Chantecler' came out, and everybody
was talking about it. You know that
the leading lady chicken in the play
is the hen pheasant, the leading gen
tleman being the rooster chanticleer.
We concluded to get ourselves up as
these two birds. | was a month ar
ranging my outfit did it all myself
you know-but when l got it done it
: was a corker l made the body of q
rooster. which l strapped under my
arms, with an elegant head and comb
in front and a fine display of cocks
tail behind. the tail being made of
tissue paper of different colors. You
couldn't have told it from the real
thing
st went to see Madge the afternoon
, before the ball. 1t so happened that
we got to quarreling, and l went
off in a huff. This was unfortunate
to say the least. We had spent a lot
of time getting up our bird rigs anC
expected to make a lot of fun billing
and cooling during the ball, and the
| worst of it was, now that we were il
just the opposite condition from what
we expected, we hadn't time to ge
other rigs"
"What was the cause of the quar-
rel?"
ave tried on our costumes in ad
vance, and when she walked l told
l her she waddled like a duck. Tha
made her mad. and she fired back, anC
we soon were in for it hot and heavy.
"When the ball came off, instead o.
walking about together, 1 strutting
she cuddling up beside me, we were Il:
far apart as possible and when We
met glared at each other. After awhile
l saw her sitting in a window will
: Ned Tucker. This made me all free
Jealous as well as mad, and to show
my spleen what did l do but go W
near where they were sitting anC
whisk around with the intention O.
turning my back on Madge. l didn'
calculate how near my tail feathers
were to them, but it seems they
! brushed their faces. This made MadgC
madden than ever. Ned had just strucl
match to light a cigarette. Madg'
jerked it out of his hand and held i
under the tip Of my tail
'In a second the whole of it was il
flames. l tried to get the rooster par
of me off, but it was tied on so wei
that couldn't do it. The flames raj
from the tail to the wings and from
the wings to the rest of the body. TIT
whole roomful of people rushed toward
me, scared out Of their seven senses
every one crying, Put him out!
Whether they meant to put out tn
flames or put me out to prevent my set
ting them all afire l don't know.
was bowling with the burns and witt
fear when Roman senator took OF
his toys and wrapped it about me.
II was taken to carriage and home
I wasn't burned at all, but just to pun
ish the COMPOUNDED girl that apple,
the match l gave out that might die
She was knocked clean out, and whe
let up on her she wilted. She ha'
put match to my tail; 1 put salt o.
hers and caught her"
"You mean she caught you. Iher
= are lots of men who think they do tn
catching when they are caught then
!