davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Daytona daily news. [volume] (Daytona, Fla.) 1903-1926, 1911-02-08

Votes may he secured by securing
subscriptions 10 the Daytona Ga
zette- News, and votes Will be issu<
upon the following basis:
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24
When Diplomacy Failed.

Thomas B. Murphy, ole of the char
ter members of Minot Lodge No. 1889
and it's first esquire, who is one Of the
guests in the city today, acquired a
reputation during his residence in the
Magic City as a diplomat. No occasion
ever arose that was too much for Tom
and he was never found wanting when
the proper thing was to be said or done.
Mr.. Murphy was married last year and
his friends delight in telling of the
only time when Tom said the wrong
thing. Mrs. Murphy was getting ready
to go out, while Tom stood in the door
way, watching her complete her toilet.
By the extraordinary contortions Of her
neck, he concluded that she was trying
to get a glimpse of the back of her
new blouse, and by the tense lines
about her lips he concluded her mouth
was full of pins.
"Ump-goof -suff-wuff- shffspge"
eyes, DEAR" Tom agreed. cit looks
all right
"Ouff = wun = so = gs = mf-ugh
-ight?' was her next remark.
"Perhaps it would look better if you
did that,' he nodded, "but it fits very
nicely Is it ISL at''WTa(
She gasped and emptied the pins in
her hands.
GIVE asked you twice to raise the
blinds so that can get more light,
Tomb she exclaimed. "Can't you
understand plain English, you crnmb?''
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24
Worlds Short Story

The Satanic City asleep policemen
air hung like shroud Of mystery the Here
dog awoke the echoes with bark which could family
the pedestrians who crowded the Dusk had fallen wt
loud The buildings like ghoy spectral
and the smell Of bad spirits Fear
less Jack the boy detective Hardly
plant hero
his task. -. !.
boy detective jumped
thought, he have Rushing
conceaing himself he gd
With
chewing throwing it window paranged
waited times waited becoming weary
shrek in the pale moonlight which by this time
brany that made possible it's
mistep Bashf Bessie, will
Stealing crime for which he had been
the stairs Of the Athens Cafe Shks
through
Silently along, making
college YELL which
sight his petrfed
gagged songster shrng With in
whispers voice. Now for the
planting his foot the quming he paused
he energetica searched his helpless foe With
fearless burst the silently crept on
dead What hurled at the
by this time william, him. Elk
Tooth, the
plunged through the window and Asleep the Deep
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

Forks, N. D., dropped in. Kent used
to wear a red moustache, and some
said he was red-headed. I never no.
ticed it.
For fifteen years Frank Kent has
been Esquire of his lodge-bearing
one year when he was Exalted Ruler.
Some said Frank WIS not sufficiently
dignified to hold the mallet, but he
threw ffthe comedy for twelve months
and emerged with "dignityn record
second to none.
Since that time Kent has been the
means of allowing Grand Forks lodge
No. 255 to boast Of having an Esquire
that takes off his hat to but one man
in this part of the country-Henr,
L. Bryant Of St. Paul. It's real kind
of Kent to make the admission.
Under Grand Exalted Ruler, Jos. T.
flaming, Frank v. Kent was District
Deputy Grand Exalted Ruler. He also
established a record in that capacity.
Kent strong point, however, is
that sunny disposition, with an inclina,
ton to kid on any subject; then he ID
go down in his jeans at the drop of a
hat and give every nickel in his pc.
session to fellow that IS on his uppers
and no questions asked.
"Give 'em the flowers now, when
they can enjoy the perfume" says
Kent, "for when mans dead, he'll
be dead long time.
consider Frank v. Kent a gud,
Elk. And I make this public acknowl
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

A man was arrested for stealing
handful of peanuts off the stand. The
charge was impersonating an officer.
Billy Bedford.
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24
!: !: POETS &ORNER
The Morning Cali.

~ comes and calls at early dawn,
" An say: "Yessum.'
She calls again and just yawn
An answer: "Yessum.''
I love to lie just half awake
An dream Of fishin' in the lake
An smell the buckwheat battercake,
An answer: "Yessum."
Again she comes and gives her call,
An I say: "Yessum.''
Each mornin it is that there way:
I just say: "Yessum'
l don't get up ner stir at all;
I just say: "Yessum.'
And then she hollers: William, you
Have got your mornin chores to do.
You III have to hustle to get through. !"
An say: "Yessum.
She calls an calls an I just say:
elm comm, Yessum.'
Then dad comes and hollers: "Bill!"
AM then I stop my lynn still
An go to dressin' with will,
An boiler: "Comin.''
Chicago News
On the Fence
My brother is Democrat,
Ma yells for Prohibition.
But no one knows where Pa is at
For he's politician.
w. F.. Crewe, Jr.
*+*
A Dinner Text.
Hush, little tape worm,
Don't you cry
Here comes slab
Of pumpkin pie.
An Elk's Distress Signal.
Dear Bill:
When you gave me that I. O. U.
You said you'd pay up P. D. G.
Now can t you manage right away
To send me fifteen plunks 0. K?
I write you this on the Q. T.
hope you will R. s. V. P.
Sc many duns have come to me
I've got to signal G. @. D.
H. R. Schwabe:
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

The jolly Elk, the best Elks' paper
published n the country, barring none,
had the following mention Of Frank
Kent during the year 1909. Mr.. Kent
is the man who will lead the fawns to-
night through the bewildering wilder
ness out onto the green pastures where
fodder is abundant and those that are
thirsty will want not. Brother Eldrige
said:
We had three kinds of weather on
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

h. B. Walker: This car is just
what you want. II wiA last as long as
you live"
Jack Duis: "1n other words you
mean it will be the q, death, Of nc"
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

Gus Furstneau: essay General| What
must a man be to be buried with mil
itary honorss"
General Creel: CHE must be Cap
tain, young man.
Gus: s9Then lose my bet"
Gen. Creel: "What did you bets"
Gus: 1T bet he must be dead.''
They say that when people die they
will follow the same occupation in the
hereafter as they did on earth. 4t5,s
Chas. Meyers: "Well, if they do, I
won't serve anything but hot drinks
at my fountain
Ed. Gilbertson: "How do you like
Devils Lake now, Bryante"
VIM. Bryant: sob, pretty well, hut
dom: think it $ laid out as nicely as
Minot.
Gilbertson: emo, but it will be
when it has been dead as long,
It was agreed between two Jews
that whichever died first tn. other
would put $4,000 in the coffin. Epstein
died first-Cohen put in a check.
Ed. Gilbertson.
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

y, :" !: \
ze. supssi
Smith has 6Sr>haby[41kN !
The stork left It RR4s&atAr. N
Smith named her oleon}a3ss& 4sSSH
For he baan ;. any bS .,fk{<{lsV
~ w}hk
There was a precocjkg} young M
Who met young AA< se9&W
But to his dismk SE>SA||
When she dras$AS.HS
was wa; II, i: e s.,
Why He is Lame.
I once had doggie named Spark,
Who met with an auto at dark,
1T gave him glance
That pressed out his pants
And tore off part of his bark.
Jack Desmond.
Sure.
The place to hold
A summer school
Is some place where
The summers cool.
Ward Nelson.
Miss Anna, who halls from Savannah
Once slipped on peel of banana;
Someone said with grin
DIR. Van was called in,
Say, Van, oh, save Ann o. savan.
nah.''
!. "A. E. Buttz.
I. At a card table sat a ward heeler,
Who was shot in the heel by the dealer,
A doctor was called
And somebody bawled,
"Oh, he III heal the heel Of the heller. ,;
Bill Hausman.
j. + j.
Another Version.
| Mary had a little lamb,
A butcher was her pop,
One day he got his cleaver out
And made the mutton chop.
I "A. P. Bjorlie
$50
Something Nough.
He lived on the edge Of slough,
And whenever he felt bit blough,
Both he and his daughter
Would sail on the waughter
And shoot at the ducks as the Tough.
Adough
Tough yough.
An Elk's Wish.
, If any little word of mine
May make life the brighter,
If any little song of mine
May make a heart the lighter,
God help me speak the little word
And take my bit of singing
And drop it in some lonely vale,
: To set the echoes ringing.
" Art Reade
a
The True Elk.
= "Let me sit in my house by tn eside
:, the road,
n Where the race of men goes by;
The men who are good and the me
who are bad
AS good and as bad as T.
. g 81 would not sit in the scoffer's SCI
:. Or hurl the cynic 3 ban;
+ Let me live in my house by the side
the road
~ 1AAu NC d 444cuu W HAL.
~ -Chas. Henley
!. + i.
), A Cinc1l.
Little bows Of ribbon
,, Little grains of rice
re Make the new wed couple
Spotted in a trice.
n %. F. Kepp.
u Give ME brook, summer night,
" A shady nook by the moon s soft igl
a A girl who g sweet and fair to see
IN And you can leave the rest to me.
Mike Cowley.
t, " We Wonder?
~ What is itekes our friend Gil stSvt
: And why u Orchards Burn Y
And if all Bfsrs Irish were,
wsp'd that nS<S <)eN storn'
-.---. <z1e<<;pCt3a&SX - IN
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24
WIN. SPRIGGs

Who will have charge Of the pipe line.
Martin Mayer: essay, Callinan, how
did you know that the Farmer line
was ten minutes ahead Of time yester-
days"
Callinan: "Oh, I saw Ed. Jones
dog running into the station"
edo you belong to any secret So
cietys" eyes, the Devils Lake I'm
provement company"
Hans Halgren.
+ +
"What's a Nabisco7'
"a Nabisco 2&4y that's bit Of
frosting, laHand plastered."
~ Bert Moran.
The Devils Lake world. (Devils Lake, N.D.) 1911-1911, 1911-02-24

the 18th of the month-snow in the
morning, more snow and then not so
much snow.
Along in the afternoon the sun came
out, then Frank v. Kent of Grand
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
TUESDAY EVENT NC, MAY 9. 1911.
HOW SHALL THE FOURTH BE CELEBRATED?

RI F everybody remained in town over the Fourth of July more
interest would be shown in the matter of a proper observance
of the day. Before the Fourth thousands of people have left
the city TO spend the summer at the seashore or in the mountains,
while many thousands of others quit the city for short outings over
the Fourth. These absentees naturally do not take the interest in
the days celebration that they otherwise would, but the city au'
thorihes, at least, should not be lacking in interest. The general
desire S to change the form of celebration and make it more rational
We don't want to kill the spirit of the day by forbidding the old
time celebration without providing something in its place that will
be acceptable to the community. Other cities have had the enter
prise and public spirit to devise plans for general celebration that
are in harmony with the great event that is celebrated and that
afford the desired holiday diversion. Newark has practically done
nothing. There are merely more stringent rules and ordinances
regarding the use of explosives, and the youth of Newark are made
to feel that it is a criminal ofense to celebrate the one great day in
the nations annals. Neglect of that day shows a decadence of
American patriotism. OF what good is the teaching of lessons of
patriotism in the schools when we penalze it on the national holi-
day? 1t is true that the old observance of Fourth of July is dan
gerous to life and property and should be abolished, but it is wrong
TO outlaw a longestablshed popular custom without substituting
something in it's place. And the substitute must be of the same
abolished. Several New England cities, notably Springfield, Mass,
have successfully established new forms of Fourth of July observ-
ance that would find great favor in Newark. We believe that if
the Common Council should take the initiative an organization
would be effected for a Fourth of July celebration in our city to be
not only highly entertaining to the whole community, young and
old, but that would attract thousands of visitors. 1t is not too late
in the year TO provide for a celebration such as is suggested. ri
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
Closed sessions Justified.

To the Editor of the Evening Star:
While I am strenuously opposed, as
a rule, against secret sessions of bodies
that involve the expenditure of public
moneys, l must say that / think that
Justice Swayze is right in his position.
providing he is reported correctly, In
determining to have a Hudson. county
probe behind doors.
We all know, or ought to know, that
the average man will not talk as freely
about delicate matters while in the
glare of publicity as he would if he
were not. A room full of people, some
of them friends and some OF them enc
mics, makes a nightly big difference
with some people in telling what they
know. Such a course. too, results in
saving much money to the taxpay-
ers, and as the newspapers will get the
story, anyway, what's the difference TO
the public in that respect?
You may rest assured that there will
be little suppression of vital facts be-
hind closed doors. Justice Swayze is a
Newarker, clean and hign-minded, and
/ should be heartily backed in his ardu-
Gus task. J.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
Just a Line
About Men
You Know

Billy" Thompson, the publicity
agent of 1o1 Ranch. tells this story as
an actual happening on one OF his
trips to visit the winter quarters Of
the show near Bliss, Okla:
II was in the depot at Kansas City
when in drifted a wide-hatted man of
towering stature who doubled himself
down to the ticket window opening and
said: 4 want a berth to Bliss, Okla
"'Got a reservation asked the Pull
man clerk.
"'Reservation?' asked the man
doubling up a little more so as TO look
the clerk right in the eye. No, but
I've got 100 acres just next to The lO1
Ranch, and you don't want 70 get gay
with me-
1.-THE Bliss ma got his berth all
right" says Thompson.
Nathan Biider, the local attorney, who
can be found In the bankruptcy court
If he Is not in his office. is a great base
ball fan. A particular friend Of Mr..
Bilder, who is also TO be found most
any time around the bankruptcy court,
told the following story on Mr.. Biider.
Up to the hour of going to press 1t was
impossible 20 locate Mr.. Bilder and
verify the yarn:
The lawyer was about TO cross Broad
street at the -Four Corners" the other
day, when he sauntered over to a
newsstand. At once he became inter-
ested, for in large letters on the front
page of the Evening STAR he saw the
heading, "Madero is losing control"
Turning to an acquaintance Mr.. Bill
der asked, WHO the deuce does
Madero pitch for? What league is he
in7'
Director Wallace Ougheltree, of the
Board of Freeholders. is a hard fighter
when it I'M to getting increases in
appropriations for the different COM
mittees. His watchword is "cut down
expenses" and he sticks to 1t ven when
the rest of the board are against him.
He does not always gain his point, but
many a committee chairman has been
disappointed In not getting money he
figured on by the opposition of oughel-
tree.
Louis Knothe, special officer of the
'Pru," whose martial figure guards and
graces the exterior of its main building
in Broad street, must stand the fire of
odd questions all the day long. He has
become somewhat weary of the oft-re-
curing question asked in all serious
ness whether the building behind his
back is the Prudential, but his habitual
good nature got a hard jolt the other
day from q withered old lady. And
this is what she asked:
Say. Mr.. Onicer, can you tell me
where Mrs. Marks beauty parlor Is,
which was In business fifteen years ago
near Central avenue?"
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
In the Name of Red Tape :

To the Editor of the Evening Star;
Not so long ago when Chinese"
civil service vas a new fad Of
"reformers'' We read OF policemen be-
fore examining boards being asked the
name of the chief city of Greenland
and other Appropriate questions, and
most people concluded that if such
asinine questions constituted the es-
sence of civil service 1t merited small
attention. However. the idea had
some good features, as it has lived and
been extended. But methinks It has
stopped over again in the ease of
the East Orange payroll and has been
stabbed in the house of it's friends.
Why in the name of red-tape the
State Civil Service Commission should
haye to o. X. the payroll of East
Oranges police force is some" ques-
ton In civil government. NJ. b. O..
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
says Recall Is Humhus.

To the Editor Of the Evening Star:
Mr.. J.. I. G.. In the "Rostrurn'' says
the initiative, referendum and recall
are necessary, if the commission form
of government is adopted In this city.
l don't think so for the reason that 1t
is a curb-bit which Jerks too suddenly
and severely, and like it's prototype
when used on q horse does more harm
than good.
Now, many people seem to- be taken
in by the rolling and ponderous sound
of the above alleged "cure-all'' for bad
government. 1t is calculated to do a
lot of harm If used "ad lib" To the
inexperienced In politics 1t seems very
like a strait-jacket for the political Of
fiee-holder, and maybe 1t is. but TO the
experienced it means merely humbug
and a club for oranks.
Why, my dear ]. l. c., have you ever
seen as good work done by hanlpered or
fearsome men as that by the free agent
acting from a n of duty and guild
ed by his best Judgment?
The terms for which city ofice-hold-
ers are elected are short-the mayor
two years, aldermen I'VE years, board
of Works longer terms, but one or two
incumbents running out every year.
This gives the people a recall power
which Is quite sufficient and as effec-
tive as the proposed new idea.
Hedge about your city government
with "fussy'' things and you get hypo-
critical, Sinking gentlemen generally
to run things, afraid of being con
demned If they do and condemned if
they don't" so why not keep the fell
low who knows he will be condemned
anyhow when his turn cones to lose
popularity? Just consider this word
Popularity and you nave the key
which unioeks political d~estinies-
rough hew them how you WILL
MORE ANON.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09

@AUR government has been singularly patient in the matter, of
w the shooting of American citizens on American soil by the
Mexican combatants. No European power would display the
same forbearance under such circumstances. There is no possible
justification for this outrage in the plea that it was accidental and
unavoidable, nor in that the Mexican government was temporarily
unable to use its authority. There is no doubt of the governments
authority over the federal troops, and it is alleged that the firing
that killed and wounded people in Ell Paso was done by the federaIs.
The American public has passively looked on at the war drama in
Mexico, and, except in Texas, there has been no popular expression
of sympathy for either side. But repeated killings of American
citizens in their homes and business places on American soil have
stirred up public feeling in the United States. People begin to ask
why our government cannot guarantee protection from foreign bull
Lets even on American soil and in the presence of American troops.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
"shylock'' In Ciass-Room.

To the Editor of the Evening Star.
In a recent communication TO your
'Rostrum' a correspondent took ex-
eeption to a rabbits objection to the
study of S~hakespeare's Merchant of
Venice" in the schools. The writer
seemed to think that the rabbi was
very narrow and that he wore a chip
on his shoulder" He further said that
If the Jew can and does object to Shy
lock, then Englishmen ought to object
to Richard III. and the Scotch to
Macbeth.
Now, let us get this thing clear.
Your "Rostrum'' writer evidently
meant well. but he is just a little
short-sighted. Shyloek has done a
great deal of harm, for the simple
reason that Shylock is the only Jew
known to thousands of Christians.
Richard III. or Macbeth are but one
OF many E~nglishmen and Scotchmen
that the bard speaks of, and the
others, not being of the same calibre.
1t is easy to see that not all English
men or Scotchmen are like these two
characters. Why, if Shakespeare
wished to be fair to the Jew, why, if
he knew the Jew. did he not picture
good as well as bad Jews?
/ am acquainted with an educated
man who, In talking about his friend,
said; He is a Jew; but he is very
NICE This man evidently did not
think the Jews could be nice. He had
to explain that, although his friend
was a Jew, he could still be mice"
This man. until he was about 80 years
old. ,llved in a community where there
were no Jews, and the only Jew that
he knew anything about was Shylock.
True, he had read of other Jews, but
never did any Of the authors speak
we'll OF them. Unfortunately, he had
never read of Daniel Deronda.
So it is with the children in the
classroom. In many cases they do not
come in contact with the Jew, and for
that reason take 1t for granted that
whatever Shakespeare said about the
Jew Is right. This Is unjust. Shake
speare was unfair to the Jewish people
by making a Shylock. He should have
made a Daniel Deronda, too.
! do not thin that Shylock should
be barred from the classroom. because
I do not believe in a censorship. The
child or grown person should read
whatever he chooses. l VIII say, how
ever. that | do not think shyIock. as a
character. is q good one. and for that
reason, If the teacher wishes TO show
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
THE POWER BEHIND THE WATER.sNAKE.

m NEW question arises in the singular proceedings taken by
~ the encouragement at Washington on behalf of War Sec
rotary Dickinson for the benefit of the East Jersey Water
Company and its financial hackers. In fnrtherance of the East Jr-
sey plans it is necessary 10 condemn a right of way through Morris
canal property. Nomnaly, at least, the canal is a public utility and
IT is denied that the federal government can condemn and take any
part of that which is devoted to public use. The canal lessee op.
poses the application to the United States District Court for con.
demnation and asks that it be dismissed. But the attempt to seize
upon Morris canal property in which great corporate concerns are
interested as well as the property of the State of New Jersey indi-
Gates the power and influence of the financial interests that are at
the back of the condemnation proceedings.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-05-09
FREE LIST BILL PASSED.

m FTER having passed the Canadian reciprocity bill the House
of Representatives has now put through the free list bill
intended specially for the benefit of the farmers to com.
pensate them for the alleged injurious effects of reciprocity upon
the farming interests. The vote on the free list bill was decisive,
230 to 100, with twentyfour Republicans voting with the Democrats
on the bill. So far as this session of Congress goes, however, the
action by the House will be ineffective. The bill will be referred
in the Senate to the finance committee and there it will sleep. 1t
is not at all likely that the Senate committee will report a subst-
tutey And yet the bill is disconcerting to the standpatters who
have been opposing reciprocity on the ground that it would hurt
the farming interests. The reciprocity bill will be passed, and if
the compensatory bill is tied up in committee in the Senate or killed,
the farmers, incensed, will want to know the reason why