The central record. (Lancaster, Ky.) 18??-current, 1911-10-13
.Croaker
By MARTHA v. MONROE
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation, 1911.

"Ouioh UC JOuA SIOdhcI > Wllc
for anything" said Mrs. Busby to
Mrs. Emmons.
"Why not?"
Hes well named. He's a croaker,
true enough. Besides, he's a grumbler,
| always snarling. The incest man il
| this town is Ernest Schoefeld. He al
ways has a pleasant word for every
one. is always smiling, and
II have no use for him."
"Why not?"
| 81 prefer Croaker. Somehow I never
feel sure of Schoefield's nice sayings.
| When Croaker growls at me 1 know
what I'm getting"
Il reckon that's because you're kind
o. queer yourself.
Mrs. Croaker had trouble at times
with her husband. When she asked
him for S. to buy some needed article
he would say, with grumbling tone:
you can't get anything but the cheap
est for So. and there is no economy in
cheap things. If you're going to get
1t at all, get the best" Then he would
hand her double the amount she
asked"
| A little daughter, Alice. the only
child Of the Crackers, would occasion
ally get Il pleasant word from her
father, but she was the only one who
ever succeeded in doing so. Andy
Schoeield, Il son of the Schoefield men,
toned by Mrs. Busby, was a school
mate of Alice's, and the children were
| growing up to be lovers. Andy's father
didn't like the match and warned his
simply croaked as to the horrible
future in store for the couple. since
neither Of them would have anything
on, which to begin life.
"Why, Ernest Schoefield is rich,'
protested Mrs. Croaker
''How do you know?" snarled her
husband.
'Why. everybody says he is, and he's
just bought a $1,000 automobile
"Oh. he has. has he? Has he paid
for it,"
When Andy Schoefield became of
age and Alice was nineteen it was evil
dent that their hearts were set upon
each other. 1t was about this time that
Mrs. Busby and Mrs. Emmons met one
morning at the greengrocer's.
isn't it awful about Mr.. SchoefieldY'
said Mrs. Busby.
whats awful?"
"Why, haven't you heard7 He's
| fol lodi nd ctr oil 4,
friends. And such nice man toor'
well, Mrs. Busby, you know 1 don't
fancy these people that are so nice to
everybody. Their niceness is usually
only skin Deep"
"They say he was living beyond his
means"
Just so. That kind O. persons usual
ly do. It's their disposition to lock on
the best side O. everything, so they
don't see the DARK side. If they'd keep
an eye on the dark side they'd come
out better in the end. The bright side
don't need watchin'"
And just think how hard it is on
the young lovers, Andy Schoefeld and
Alice CrOaker. Everybody said what
a nice thing her being engaged to Andy
was. Mr.. Schoefield gave out only a
day or two before he skipped that he
was goin' to give the couple a house"
Reckon that was to keep up conf
dence"
well, Pm sorry for Alice. should
think she'd want to get married If only
to get away from that crusty old
father of hers
"Oh, don't think Mr.. Crackers so
bad! kind O. like to have him srarl
at me dice in awhile. know he amt
fooliD' me. and that's more than ]
know of these people who are always
givin' me soft solder. Good mornin'.
Mrs. Busbyr
Mrs. Busby went away muttering,
"The reason she likes old Croaker is
she's one O. the same kind herself"
The Schoefeld failure threw the
Schoefield and the Croaker families
both into a painful condition. First
there was the disgrace attached to
Andy's father running away to get
rid of criminal proceedings against
| SCOOAu, <Allug a SCAL isllu
up; third, to mention marriage under
the circumstances to Mr.. Croaker was
considered by Mrs. Croaker and Alice
to be equivalent to shaking red rag
before q mad bull.
However. Andy bad position pay
ing him $50 a week. and on this the
two resolved to be married. Mrs
Croaker broke the news to her hus
band, expecting some violent expires
sions, and she got them.
They're going to be married on $40
week, are they? Tht's about
enough to pay house rent"
"They can board at first, and If you
can spare, say, 500 for clothes for
Alice she won't need to spend any
thing in that way for q year or two
"a hundred dollarsl That's all rot
'Well, fifty then
Mr.. Croaker went off to his den
where he kept his desk. and. coming
back, handed his wife a check for
$1,000.
"Why, pa, what does this mean"
"Trousseau." grunted the old man
and went away grumbling about the
FOLLY of young people trying to bite
of more than they could chew.
A third meeting occurred between
Mrs. Busby and Mrs. Emmons.
"Mornin', Mrs. EmmOns. Have you
heard about that $4,000 house that
crusty old Croaker gave his daughter
when she was marriedY'
"No; did he? l always said I'd
rather have that man hit me than
roother man tak soft to me-"