Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-08-31

GMHaA&H##X customs right.
.Hn%8E;H.NEy h circulates the
Ssi4##%W- 81 cooling breeze
4&8 Till he's SO cold he
&&2N&A has to sneeze
G:aa11J And l opine
s1A~s~A~ His SYSTEMS fine.
sC hoUIToS0 My hats off to the
Japanese.
I'd give a good deal if l knew
How he can play this system through.
l think 1t would be simply grand
II We could do it in. this land.
/ ask my wife on Bonded knees
II she won't fan me all night please
Not on your life,
fan my wife.
She's a suffraget. not Japanese.
PROPOSED FOR THE ANANIAS
The man who sends apu garden seeds
he guarantees will grow.
The man who says he never on vaca-
ton cares to go.
The man who say he never sOWed
wild oats when he was young.
The man who says he never was OF
watermelOns stung.
The man who says his wife does not
object when he's out late.
The man who says he always pays his
rent right on the date.
The man who says that he can run his
car without repairs.
The man who simply says he dOteS on
all grand opera airs.
The man who says his wife and he
have never had a scrap.
The man who says. for stag events,
he doesn't care a raj
The man who says he uses only sever
o OF cOal.
The man who SAYS. financially, he's
never been in the hole.
The man who says he loves to do all
of the household chores.
The man who say in winter time he
loves to sleep outdoors.
The woman who says that h does
NOT care at all for dress.
The who says that she has no
vain fads to confess.
The oma III says that she dearly
loves to cook the meals.
The woman who says hat she always
shows the mood she feels.
The who says that she's never
jealous. one small bit.
The woman who says that she never
has an angry fit.
The woman who says that her kid
are always well behaved.
The woman who says that, upon her
hats, much coin she'd saved.
The woman who says that she's never
cared to earn to sing.
The woman who says that she never
frets DER anything.
If these don't bring the membership
up to what lie desires,
! Wen give r. Il. 5000, 900 more first
class, artistic liars.
ON THE WAGON.
It's Il long and lonesome ride
On the Wagon.
And monotonous beside,
On the Wagon.
But you don't see cows WITH wings
Or a green giraffe that sings
Or a rattlesnake that stlngs
Or a pink wildcat that springs
Or a grizzly bear that clings
Or a thousand other things
On the Wagon.
OPPORTUNITY.
Dey say dat opportunity knocks once
at each mans do;
She knocks jes' once, den goes away
an dom come back no mo-.
Dat may be SO. but jes' de same, All
entertains a doubt.
Fo' II she ever called on me, she called
when All was out.
All thinks dat oppo'tuity done git ss1
dates all mixed.
She knocks at n mans do SO muct..
he has to git 1t fixed.
De mex man may be Waitin' for to en-
tahtain her call.
But this house aim upon her list an
she dom knock at all.
She calls on some folks every day an
knocks till she am So.
h rings q bell an toots a hon an
den breaks down the do.
Ell dey DOM come an let her In, she
takes 1t In her hatd
To go up stars an grab 'em quick an
yank EN- out OF bald.
All tells yo' what-if dat OF gal should
come aroun' NAH place,
She'll fin me waitin' at de do to grab
her 'roun' de wais'.
Ahll hang right on jes' like Abs gwine
to choke her plum to def.
Shell have jes' n affinity and dat will
be mahseff.
But !.ssen little chillun all, ct do not
"a to wait.
Jes' staht right out an look TO her
an. mos as sho' as Fate.
She'll be jes' roun' de cohner an be
gihd to welcome you.
OATS what mos folks what meets OF
opportunity mus do.
FROM tue sPINKs' CORNERS
vlGlLANT.
Miss Pansy Frink Is q graduate OF
Yale-Madame Yale.
Grandpa Perkins is so def he can't
hear . word you want him TO.
Everything SCENE to have q mission
% this world excepting mission fur
niture.
Nrs. Birdie Fink of Pleasant Valley.
who has been married three times, u
now hooking for . safe and sane
Fourth.
Rod Hask,rs. Of this town, has lost
khn ANh - VeAht NnnnAa0fnm 18TH eA~