davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Graft In SELLING EqQs.

To one who can afford them, good
eggs are cheap at any price, but in
vestigation shows that much of the
extra. money that the consumer pays
to avoid the risk of getting a bad egg
for this breakfast is simply the dea,
er's charge upon the consumers ig-
norance. While Investigating the sub
ject for the department Of agriculture
it was learned that a f-ocer in New
York city was buying Iowa eggs for
90 cents and selling them under his
private brand name for 40 cents. The
grocers across the street were selling
the same eggs for % cents. The ex-
ira Is cents was pure graft, made pos
sible by the merchaI is gall and the
customers gullibility.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
HITS NAIL ON HEAD
WIFE GIVES POINTED ANSWER
TO HUeBY'S QUESTION.
Attitude CT Sexes Toward Meetings
for Women Only and for Men Only
Made Him Feel Superior Until
Wife Spoke.

1t was HAS p. m. The man and
his wife had just come home. They
did not come together. They had not
been to the same place. She had been
to a meeting for women only, he tc
one for men.
Said the woman: There was a
man at our meeting tonight"
Said the man: There were about
hundred women tried to push their
way into ours
That one man." she said, locked
awfully scared"
Those hundred women" said he.
didn't look bit scared
Il think" she said, ''the mao got
into our hall by mistake. AnHhow.
he got away as soon as he could"
There was no mistake about those
women being where they WERE" said
the man, land they stayed until they
were shooed away by the police"
There was short silence. Said
the man presently:
''It is this difference In the attitude
of the sexes toward the meetings for
women only and for men only that
makes me feel morally superior. II
makes me proud of my sex. l haven't
the slightest desire-no man has the
slightest desire-to butt into q fem
mime confab, but the woman never
breathed who wasn't on edge with Gu.
riosity in regard to what takes place
when a bunch of men hold a secret
conference. l have known women
who admitted that they would will
llngly sacrifice years normal pleas
ures for the privilege of being snug
gled into Masonic initiation or some
other masculine rite. Contrast that
prying spirit with the modesty Of men.
On your own showing, when a man
is accidentally trapped In hall where
beauty congress or a dressmakers'
convention is In progress, he is SO
miserable that the fly in the spiders
web had picnic compared with his
martyrdom. That, to my mind, is
pungent commentary on the disposi.
ton Of man and woman. Can you
explain it?"
The woman confessed that she
could not explain it-furthermore, that
she did not intend to try.
There was another silence Said
the woman after a little:
What happened at your meeting
tonight"
"Oh, nothing much" said the man.
What happened at yours?"
Everything" said the woman. Then
she proceeded to tell what every
thing comprised. 1t took more than
half an hour to tell it. Every now
and then the man, for consistency's
sake, tried to look bored, but the air
of Indifference was i'll assumed The
narrative really interested him, and
he was sorry when it was finished
The story being ended, there was an,
other silence, while the woman
braided her hair Suddenly she said:
Il can answer your question now"
what question:"
cWhy women are crazy to go to
mems meetings, while men wouldn't
give fig to go to women's meet
ings. It's because the women come
home and tell the men everything
that happened, so they don't need to
go, whereas the men never tell the
women anything"
by George" said the man, II don't
know but what you're right"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Women Archaeolooists.

DR.. Edith M. Hall of Mt Holyoke col
Iege, continued her excavation work
in Crete through the whole of last
summer. For the last three weeks Of
the time DR.. Hall worked Independent.
ly at a site called Varokastro, stu.
ated on lofty peak three hours ride
from Gournia, where the other exca.
vations were being conducted. In
the summer DIR. Anna Young visited
the astronomical observatories in
Rome, Florence, Zurich, Potsdam, Der.
lin and Greenwich. And DR.. Mignon
Talbot, professor of geology at Mt
Holyoke, found the fossil remains of
one of the walking reptiles, of which
but four or five specimens have been
unearthed, in the Connecticut valley
sandstone.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

When the Hudson Bay Trading
company began its trading among the
Indians 1t was found that by selling
the Indians liquor they could more
easily be induced to trade their pelt-
ries
The first whisky or intoxicant OF 10
fertor quality was distilled in England
and brought to America in large bar
rels, but in transporting it overland it
was found more convenient to divide
1t into small kegs. The traders soon
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Learned Value OF Money

less leaks which Slapped my financial
strength. l purchased a neat little
leather covered book which would fit
into my purse, and every cent ex-
pended was honestly noted down. At
the end of the week | went carefully
over this accumulated list Of eX-
penses, and opposite those which /
decided were necessary ! placed a
tiny circle. opposite those that were
entirely unnecessary placed cross,
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
a Snn,s Commitment.

His incessant work, his avoidance
of all rest and recreation and his rig
orous self-denial made Joseph Pulit-
ger, in his days in harness, the de-
spair of his family.
In this connection a pretty story is
told about the famous journalists son
Ralph. Mr.. Pulitzer had refused to
take a holiday, and Mrs. Pulitzer ex-
claimed:
Did you ever know your father to
do anything because 1t was pleasant
Eyes, once-.when he married you,
the young man gracefully replied.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Are You Weak, All
Run Down?

This condition is directly caused by
bad blood. When the blood is made rich
and pure by Hoods Sarasaparilla, you
will feel strong and cheerful; it will put
new life into. your veins, new vigor into
and good digestion; make you lock better,
sleep better and feel better; will make
the hardest work lighter and the darkest
day brighter Facts! Thousands confirm
them. Get Hoods today
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

scribe the awful pain I endured. The
kidneys were in terrible condition !;
pain in voiding urine was intense,
and often I passed blood. For weeks
I was laid up in bed. Doan's Kidney
Pills permanently cured me after
had doctored without relief
Remember the name-Doans
For sale by all dealers. 80 cents a
box. Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
A Prime Cause of Ill Health.

A famous physician on being asked
recently what is the chief cause OF Ill
health, replied: Thinking and talk
ing about it all the time. This sense
less introspection in which so many
of the rising generation of the ,nerv-
GUS folk indulge is certainly wearing
them out. When they are not worry
ing as to whether they sleep too much
or too little, they are fdgeting over
the amount of food they take or the
quantity of exercise necessary for
health. In short, they never give
themselves a moments peace"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Origin of FirelUafer

became aware of the fact that by
diluting the whisky with water more
furs could be obtained This was prac-
tised for some time, but the Indians
learned that good whisky poured on
fire would cause it to flame up, where
as had the whisky been diluted the
fire would be quenched. 1t was by
this simple experiment that the term
'firewater" became a common word
among Indians.
A chief who had experienced the
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Remarkable Dental Freak.

An unusual case is reported from
Parkes, N S. W., where young wom-
an some time ago had IL teeth ex-
tracted which were causing her trou-
BILE. Before the gums had sufficiently
healed to permit of artificial teeth be-
ing fitted, new teeth began to make
their appearance, and every one OF the
II has now been replaced in this man
ner.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

and opposite those which were Of no
particular advantage and could as
well have been dispensed with
9laced a small rectangle.
The first week / was honest enough
to acknowledge that almost every ex-
penditure called for a cross. The
next week the rectangles predomina-
ted, and after that the circles began
to grow more numerous-and need
less to say tie Items were fewer.
! learned Why my sister could al.
ways hare ready money and yet be
we'll dressed,
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Inventive Parent.

Woodbury. noticed that Knewpop
had electric lights put on his lawn last
summer.
Seaforth-Yes, and he also had a
baby sling put on his lawn mower. He
figured, If his baby was wakeful, so he
would have to walk with 1t, he might
as we'll push his lawn mower and cut
the grass at the same time. l have
often seen him come from the house at
midnight, turn on the lights, put the
baby in the sling and start out on the
double job.-Chtcago Daily News.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
rmnortant to Mothers
Stupid Man.

my husband has no idea OF the
value of money!"
why, 1 thought he was a careful
business man."
He thinks SO. too. But he abso-
lutely doesn't realize what lovely hat
l can buy for $3.50"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

"Yod do:et resent that successful
candidates pFo.s and naughty man
usrf"
Nope" rejoined Farmer Corntossel
"The fact that he's in politics is all the
guarantee I want that sooner or later
he'll meet WITH some kind &C 2terrible
finish"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Chance For AltruIsts.

There are societies in nearly all
towns for the prevention of cruelty
to animals"
Yes"
And yet, no efforts are ever made
to keep a man from trying to shave
himself with a safety razor"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Devils mountain way?
They had put the dogs out, and l
was to get to bull pine tree on the
east bank of the river, at place where
they said the dogs would be apt to
send a deer into and across the
stream, giving me fine chance for a
successful shot Before 1 got there
heard the dogs baying off on the west
side of the river, which was about 800
yards wide there.
81 was still quite a way from the
tree when doe came in sight on the
opposite shore, jumped into the river,
swan across and bounded away into the
woods away from me. The dogs were
still yelping off in the woods across
the river, and not yet in sight. l made
a few big strides and got to the tree,
as didn't know what might be ahead
of the dogs yet, just as out of the open
ing where the doe had leaped and
taken the water bounded a big buck.
81 dropped behind the tree, expect
ing the buck to come On across. The
doe had run out on a tongue of land
that extended into the river about 20
feet, and from the extremity of that
bit of land had jumped into the wa
ter. Suppostng, of course, that the
buck would seek the same course,
was ready to let him have it as soon
as he pulled himself out on my side
of the river, but he had other ideas.
1.-THE dogs hadn't broken from cover
yet. l could hear them coming not
far behind the buck. Two or three rods
from the shore, on that side of the
river and the same distance below the
tongue of lano, was a big rock that
rose perhaps eight feet above the wa
ter
Instead of coming on as the doe
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Nature FakInQ,

Did you hear that fellow order two
eggs fried Oh their backs?"
Yes"
How do you suppose the chef can
tell which is the back of an egg"
"Oh, that's easy. The side nearest
the fire is the back.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
The Element of Convenience,

The man rocked the boat in mid
stream. Was he laboring under q
misapprehension?
That isn't as idiotic as mortgaging
your house to buy an automebile?"
at length called out to him from the
shore.
He laughed bitterly.
Il know it," he replied. But l can
rock the boat without having to get
my wife to sign papers! Puck.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Here's a new kind of magazine
story"
in what way?'
"a village storekeeper is intro
duced who doesn't say, Dog my
Cats!"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Yes, We got the doe. One of our
party brought her down two miles up
the river as she was taking the water
to cross back again, still way ahead
of the dogs"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
A Surprise.

I'm going to give my wife real
surprise this Christmas"
THAT so? What are you going to
give herr"
"The money"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Terrified Hero.

did you have any narrow escapes
in the surf last SUMMER"
EYES," replied the life-saver. Zone
lady whom 1 rescued was so grateful
that she nearly married me-"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

dlSOrdered KID
neys. Doan's
Kidney Pills
cure sick kid
neys.
F r e d A
Campbell, At.
lantic Ave.
Boothbay Har
Dor, Me, says
g" 0annot do
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

bad effects of whisky among his p,
pie said it was most certainly distilled
from the hearts of wildcats and the
tongues of women from the effects 1t
prOduced.-Red Man.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
Mot Yet but Soon,

Policeman Ito street urchin)-
Now. my boy, what mischief have You
been up to-"
please. sir, amt been up to
1othin'. yet. Life,
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Hero Is a Valuable Hint for Those
Who Are Careless in Its
Expenditure.
My sister had the faculty OF speno-
ing money and of having something
r. show for 1t. | had the ability to
disburse my equal allowance and TO
have little or nothing left 10 show
whittier 1t hed gone. It was annoy
ing and even embarrassing. ! deter
mined to place check upon the USE
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

The danger from slight cuts or wounds
is always blood poisoning. The immedi-
ate application of Hamlins Wizard Oil
makes blood poisoning impossible.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Heavy words in meeting viii not
make up for snort weight in market.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
A;o,,erpfzino the KIondike

In the Klondike steam, hot air and
hot water plants are displacing the
old-fashioned wood stoves, especially
in hotels and the bigger trading
places.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

The greatest glory OF free-born
people is to transfer that freedom to
their children.-Harvard.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
NJ aturaiIy.

so you have lost your cook?"
Shes dead"
Did she die a natural death?"
Yes, the natural death for person
that starts a fire with kerosene"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
ARE YOUR KIDNEYS WELL?

The kidney secretions tell if disease
is lurking in the system. Too fire.
quent or scanty urination, discolored
urine, lack Of control at night tell Of
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

PILES CURED IN TO Il DAYS
Your druggist will refund money If PAZO ONT
MENT fails to cure any case Of Itching, Blind.
Bleeding or Protruding Piles in TO Ia days. Soc.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

DIR. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets regulate
and invigorate stomach, liver and bowels
Sugar-coated, tiny granules, easy to take
as candy
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Mrs. Wtnslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces infamma-
ton, allays pain, cures wind collie, 25c a bottle.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Lofty Ambition.
what is your ambition?"
Merely to make more money than
my wife can spend. Detroit Free
Press.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

It's a great accomplishment to be
able to sing, but don't lose sight of the
fact that it's just as great one TO
know you can't.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

For HEADACHE-H!ck CAPUDINE
Whether from Colds, Heat, Stomach or
Nervous Troubles, Capudine will relieve you.
It's lquid-pleasant to take-acts tmmedi-
ately. Try it. 10c., 25c., and 30 cents at drug
stores.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
The niHerAnce

Ted-Did he sober down and
marry?
Ned-No; he married and sobered
down.-Smart Set
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
For COLDS and GRIP

Hicks CAPUDINE Is the best remedy-re-
lieves the aching and observation-disclosures the
Cold and restores normal conditions. It's
lidufd-effects Immediately. 10c., 25c., and SOC.
drug
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

The worst foe you have is the man
who would kill all your enemies.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

SANDER soon dies if you take it out
of circulation.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

The best way to lift men is to meet
them on the level.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

In the studios of eminent sculptors.
One statue that was recently added
to our national collection at our cap
ital city is the memorial to Baron
Steuben, the German officer who
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

An implanted duty done is better
than a planned duty undone.-Baker.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Heresy hunting is simply an obses-
sion of omniscience.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27
TO DRIVE OUT MALARIA

Take the Old Standard GROVES TASTELESS
CHILL TONIC. You know what you are taking.
The formula is plainly printed on every bottle,
showing it Is simply Quinine and Iron in a taste
less form. The Quinfne drives out the malaria
and the Iron builds up the system. Sold by all
dealers for 80 years. Price 30 cents.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

ONLY ONE "BROIO OUININE."
Tint - IAXATIVE BRONO OUININE. Look for
the signature of f. W. GROVE. Used the World
over 10 Cure Il Cold in One Day. 2jc.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

We find the worst in all by trying to
get the best of any one.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

Getting His.
'sHad a most enjoyable time at the
dentists today"
"Eh! Enjoyable?"
Eyes When 1 went in another den
fist was filling my dentists teeth
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

F ANIMALS don't reason
out the why's and where
fores of things and act &C.
cordingly," said Col. Hamp
Stone of the Big Thicket
country, Texas, what was
that big buck that l didn't
shoot doing that time down
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-01-27

own-Ine Z. s. Marine Band and the
chorus of vocalists If there is to be
one. Most important of all, he knows
where to seat each and every one OF
the hundreds of digtinaries who at
tend such a ceremonial. 1t will be
understood that it Is not merely
question either Of seating celebrities
SO that they will be comfortable and
have an unobstructed view OF the
ceremonies. In addition to such con-
siderations are the more important
ones of the rank of each spectator
and the honors and position to which
he is entitled in consequence. Inc
man who conducts big unwilling GER
emony in Washington must know
who is who" and who goes first
lust as accurately as the men who
manage the presidents receptions at
the White House.
After all, however, perhaps the most
important Improvement that has been
, brought about under this new era OF
statue dwellings is found in the
method adopted for the actual unVell-
ing. Under the old plan, as has been
noted. the draperies were almost sure
to catch or tangle. Then there was
Juggling followed by the rasping tear
of cloth and the statues erstWhile
clothing was dragged away in decid-
eddy dilapidated condition. Under the
new system the statue to be unveiled
is completely covered from head to
foot with large American. flags and
these are so arranged with ropes and
pulleys that when a signal is given
they fail away from the sculptured
figure, and, better yet, instead Of lit
tering the pedestal, are drawn above
and away from the statue. This
scheme enables persons on all sides
of the statue to get a good view of the
new monument and furthermore, a
pretty touch Is added to the picture
by the uplifted flags waving in the
breeze from overhead ropes spanning
the space above the statue OF courseI
this system of flag unwilling is not an
easy one to arrange and special
crew of expert Triggers" made up of
enlisted seamen in the navy is de-
tailed to arrange and manipulate thel
flags. The government is beginning
to get applications from all parts of
the country, whenever a statue Is to
be unveiled, to loan its master Of cere-
monies and his crew of Triggers" to
handle the practical part of the event.