davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02

Of tire Phrygian blizzard, he smiled
muttered that 1t might be . whole
lot worse. There wasn't any sort "a
language that would make him angry,
sort Of ner scheme that upset his
tranquility In the slightest degree.
Epictetus wa there with his anRcrs
crossed - hours Of the day, and when:
an untOward event approached his
vicinity, he laughed so loudly that hei
showed all his crown and bridge work
n scared the event away. :
He was the original cheer-up apos-'
tie. was Epictetus. He didn't care a:
tinker's darn whether school kept or;
no and he lived so long that the au-;
~thor1ties thought for q while they
o have to o him on the judg-,
ment day so that he would be able to
Join the great line of Stoics who had,
gone before.
They never dared TO let Epicteus go,
to a musical comedy. for he would;
laugh SO loudly that he would break;
up the show. and anybody who can.
laugh at a musical comedy. it must be,
admitted, is some optimist. They had.
to keep all the patent medicine alma,
macs away from him for fear that he.
would laugh himself to death. and 1T
is a very lucky thing for Epictetus,
that Joe Miller and Ellis Parker But
Ter came along several centuries after
his time.
They never dared IL let Epictetus go.
the slightest degree. He could tinker
up a laugh out of anything. but, it,
must always be remembered. fair
reader, that Epfctetus lived away back
In the first century. We have often
wondered what would happen to Epic,
tetus and his philosophy IL he livedI
today and his wife would come to him,
about s mute before train time and
ask him to hook up about 376 of those.
cute little hooks and eyes concealed
in the lace on the back of her dress.
What would Epictetus do II he should
find that his wife had loaned his razor,
to the Ladies' Aid society for the pur-
pose of slicing ham sandwiches to be;
sold at the church supper? What,
would he do il his next DOR neighbor.
borrowed his lawn mower the first of
May n returned 1t the first Of Octo-'
Der? What would he do ii he lived
next door to a talking machine flend,
or ii the neighbor next door kept the
chickens that dug up his flower beds.
or If some insane galoot should get.
the wrong number and call him out of
bed by telephone at 2 o'clock in the
stairs and break a $196 cheval glass 2.
What il he should have a tire blow out
nine miles from any human habita-
ton n no tools with him?
Would Epictetus remain a true Stole;
or would he let out several yards OF
pyrotechnic language which would.
burn up all the oxygen in tho air
and suffocate the innocent ~bystanders 2
That is a question. of course, but IL,
there are any Stoics hanging around
in this day n age. they are not
working at it. Epictetus, we believe
was never obliged to undergo a real
test.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
On the Brain.
From the Washington Sta

From the washington Star.
While John d. Rockefeller was show
ing the Rockefeller Family associatinn
over his superb Pocantico Hills estate
last month the talk turned to golf. ana
the host said with q genial laugh:
"It Is amazing how golf takes hold Of
you--how 1t gets on your brain.
'"The other day I got of a train Ne
er and golf skirt. with a bag az 0olf
sticks swung from her shoulder.
"A porter. al he relieved her Of the
heavy bag Of clubs said:
".Hansome. m!ss?'
NO She answered absently; FOUR
some"
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02

to that rose. Jesus Christ is to met" These
from Scott and Tennyson are
worth more to the world than all the
doubling higher critics nave ever said.
from
Tom Paine to Bob lnaersolI
Hon. Mrs. Maxwell Scott. a grand
daughter OF Sir Walter. a brilliant and
beautiful woman. now owns and occupies
this amous home, Abbotsford. She ia
probably the best posted person alive to-
day on the life. character and career of
Mary. Queen of Scots. The secret doubt
less of her f~ar-reaching research and
thorough Investigation into the times and
countries in which this illfated queen
lived and died. is a very realistic painting
which Sir Walter left hanging in his
drawing room. Of the head of Mary.
Queen of Scots. painted Immediately after.
the tragedy of F~otheringay. The head Of
John the Baptist in a charger, is not more
suggestive of remorseless cruelty and in
justice than this picture. In Westminster
Abbey today the bodies of Queen Eliza
beth and Mary. Queen of Scots, rest With
In a few feet Of each other. and there is
scarcely nm hour of the day that the tomb
OF Elizabeth does not echo the sighs of
admiration and sympathy heaved by the
tomb OF her rival.
Mrs. Maxwell Scott. speaking OF the
tragedy of Fotheringay. says: 'sThus ter
minated . trial which In legal history
probably has no counterpart, n r..
Earding which the following points e.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
RErRIBUTION.
Copyright. 1911, by G. N. Nather.

The curfew tolls
the knell OF part
ing day.
The lowing herds
wind slowly DER
The lea.
A load of gay joy
riders pass that
a
Their speed much
greater than it
ought to be.
They pass a farm
er's rig as in a
dream.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
Economy Of FirsIess Cooker.

Mr.. Gray-Thunder! What made tia
ing for boarders:
Mrs. 0aryl guess II was heating -
stones for my new 1rsssss cooker.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
SOME SHAVING. THIS.
Sign in local barber shop window:
SHAVING DONE
ON THE INSIDE.
LUCKY AWAIT

VIAL
An aviator brave was he.
Who sailed aloft in highest glee.
He'd never had an accident
And wasn't wise to what fear meant.
But on this day his %aeroplane
Was taken with internal pain.
1t crumpled up. high in the air
And gave the watching throng a
He fell three Thousand feet and hit,
But it did not hurt him q bit.
Oh, lucky, lucky AWAIT
He landed on a lady's hat.
WHAT DRIVES STATION AGENTS
7 CRAZY.
DO YOU ppo No. II will be in
not?"
Can you tell me if q young lady
in a blue dress and straw hat got Off
the train which got in from the north
at 2:1G?"
what time does the S O'Clock train
leave. and is 1T going to leave on
timer
lis the train going to get into Fort
Wayne on time. do you Think"
What made No. z SO late a week
ago last Tuesday,"
do you think it is safer to ride in
a parlor car: or is there apt to be a
rear end collision7"
"Why is No. Is marked. up Is min
utes late?"
Have you noticed an old gentleman
with white whiskcrs and q telescope
go through the gate any time today? 2"
"How do 1 get to Bink's Corners,
Tex. without changing cars?"
II lost a back comb on the south
bound train three weeks ago last
Wednesday,. Can you tell me where
I can find it?"
will you watch for my sister and
tell her how to get UP to my house?
1 haven't time to wait for her train"
BY A RURAL SWAIN.
I once fell in love with a maiden;
She was no spring chicken at that.
She. surely enough, was a vision.
From her dainty suede shoes to her
hat.
I blowed all my money upon her:
I bought ice cream cones by the
peck,
I bought her a nice box of candy:
My bank account soon was a wreck,
The next day I asked her % marry.
The pain in my heart really hurt:
Twas then that I found out that Car
Was one of them things called a
fiirt.
one MuFHureu, i rove you most
dearly.
But marriage you should not expect
That's out of the question. yes clearly:
My husband would surely object"
Oh, often. quite often. I've tarried
And basked in their coquettish spell:
But most all Of them have been mar
r4cd.
Oh. how is a Teller to tell?
~
AN ESSAY ON EPICTETUs.
Epictetus wasn't a corn cure. 2
breakfast food. q vaudeville juggler OF
a grand opera singer. Epictetus wa
q famous Stole philosopher and was q
native Of Hierapolis, in Phrygia. He
died in 1873 A. d.. He taught q high
ideal Of life and nothing peeved him
He remained cheerful even under the
most adverse circumstances. When
somebody stepped on q narrative 81
his flowing toga. ripping out Q baca
breNdth and leaving him ct the ma4Vy
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
RARITlEs.

One-hOrSe hearses.
Cord limbed circus acrobats.
Lawyers who can write legibly.
Millionaire magazine poets.
One-eyed chorus girls.
Newlyweds who don't look the pa,
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
DOWN THE AIsLE,

Snatches II conversation between
young women clerks Of a certain de-
partment store, heard As. we passed
down the aisle looking for a spool Of
No. 60 white cotton thread:
"And my gentleman friend has got
the prettiest finger nails. You never
Me and him went out to North Park
last night. Glass"
But they say he has throwed her
over for another skirt. Amt it Just
the linn"
Mr.. Jones told mo he never seen
such eyes in his life as Mayme's. Must
be somebody BACKED en-. Here, Kitty.
kitty. kitty"
soda is the limit and do you know-'.
THE fioorwalker said he was going
to see that l got an increase in salary
next month. Bunk. Maggie"
Nope, not tonighs. Angie. My in
ended is coming over to blow himself
boys goin' to pass away with enlarge
ment Of the heart before I ever get q
chance to marry him." :.
"Um-um-um! Swell, swell, / should
think so. but"
Why. you catty thing. L amt put a
thing on my face for three years. YOU
Il me"
ACCORDING TO UNCLE ABNER.
There seems to be some discussion AS
to whether Gilbert Hubbard is the Ber-
nard Shaw of America or whether Ber-
nard Shaw is the Ebert Hubbard Oh
England.
There is said to be a plot on foot to
destroy the French navy. but It seemi
as though ii they would only let thd
French navy alone it would destroy
itself.
Judging by the pictures in various
American newspapers. the French bati
tleship Liberte rescmbled every known
craft from a motorboat to the Lusii
tania.
Andy Carnegie has decided. not I'd
start a newspaper. after all. Starting
a newspaper is no job for a mar with
only a few hundred million.
That war may not be such a bad
thing for America. Maybe some Of thJ
Italian grand opera singers will have
to stay over there and fight.
The linotypers are still referring I'd
him occasionally as Chump Clark.
MUST BE A PAINFUL JOB.
One of the want ads:
WANTED-YOUNG WOMEN TO
SEW LACE ON.
-
PESTS.
The friend who meets you on the
street n takes a good 10-cent cigar
U OF o vest pocket.
1ne OLD gentleman who
used to know you when :.
The neiRhbor who wants to tell Won
how to make your lawn flourish.
The young lady upstairs who IL fust
learning MADAME Sherry" on the.
piano. when o rave danced to it
two winters.
The. young man who has written the
greatest musical comedy In the an
mails OF crime and can't get 1t pro-
duced.
HOW LONG IF YOU WIND EN-
SIGN in a local jewelry store win
dow:
THESE CLOCKS RUN
THIRTY DAYS
WITHOUT WINDING.
NO PLACE FOR STOUT TAnoRs
Sign in downtown tailor shop win
~wanted-ssvsral thin cost makers"
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
THINGS 10 THINK ABoUT.

Statistics show that there are 1oo,-
000.0 900 swine in the world, not In
Guiding those who push women and
children out of the way so as to get
the best seats in the street car.
There was once a street car conduc-
tor who got off and opened umbrellas
for women passengers during rain
storms. He died of pneumonia.
In n month a single caterpillar
devours 5000 times it's w weight in
o A married caterpillar probably
devours much more.
Nicaragua is a small country in
Central America, bounded on the north
by revolutionists, on the south by re-
concentrates, on the east by fleeing ex-
presidents n on the west by mos
quitoes.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02
A@N"Tt1E.SPUR.
@F.THE.MowENT
~ By ROY K. NOUlToN.

agara Falls, the sphinx of Egypt or
the Chicago Masonic temple.
Every family should keep a scrap
book. In it should be recorded the
various family scraps.
Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1911-11-02

various family scraps.
LITTLE CHILE.
Have a good time, little chile,
When yo' kin, 70 arter while
This we're worl' won't be de same
So't of free and easy game
LAX ct is jess now TO- you.
AS de seasons come and go.
They am bringin' Ah'm afraid
Trouble closer to yo' haid.
Joy yo'sef am romp an play,
Make dc mos of every day.
Fo' each day comes once TO sho'
But 1t don come any mo-
Oats 4 fac. now yo' has heard,
Pickaninny, mahk NAH word.
Have q good time. little chile,
While yo've got q chance to smile
When yo' ain no cause to fret
Whar you'-all am gwin to get
u to eat and nuff to war.
An ct ain SO very far
Dat you'-ali has got to go
In de path OF life befo'
YO' aus hustle, all alone.
To feed chilluns of vo' own.
DON yo' hurry. little chile.
Jes' be patient fo' awhile
Fo' ct ain no cinch my lam,
FO' to he Il groWcd-up man.
Have a good time, little chile.
Fo' in .jes' 81 little while
Yo'll be wohkin' every day
Fo' to keep dc wolf away.
Yoll be worried what to get
All de polk chops what it ct.
An dc lasscs an de cakes
LAX yo' good oil nanny makes
An de fi'wood an de rent
Which will take yo' las red cent
Don't be anxious TO to vote
And q family burden tote.
Hol' yo' bosses fo' awhile:
Have a good time. little chile.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
THE KILArEA RESERVATION,

Evening Post funny over the plan to
Kauea expresses doubt that gasmg corporation
will deprive of hot place Nevertheless cor
poraon graspng otherwise already owns the volcano ana WIN
which includes arborca wonders that ted TO
be from the deprcdatOns of fire and cattle
promise Of Secretary Garfield after personal Vs
to establish the volcano but Congress
which monuments unmake then the friends OF con
syaon here call national park instead AS to the
the plea precisely the argument that Jusled e
setting the Yellowstone calls for the protection oil the "
aan volcano the pers private corporate con
region though great in like the Yellowstone Is
geyses fire quite interesting to the pup
lie geysers hot water Fern forests are as
slightly protection pine forests Woodland
sOlmdes of bird life liable to quick
if protected have claims the government AKIN TO
animal life that ought also to be pre-
odd shapes and wild scenery the klae
special claims well the Yellowstone PARK the
Yosemite the petrifed forests of Arizona.
right urging Kiauea reservation upon
Congress national well local The volcano region
absolutely unique 1t should be fenced its outlying
be used exclusively for cattle Instead
should there anything the validity of the national park
people for all time and opened witt
roads places Locally the gain
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
ROAD MAKING.

rOadmang does to have prohed mu
by experience years this administration or that has d S
hand methods and results were kept y
appear have made impression Each road suerheu
ent along tries scheme which may as was the
repeat past errors
ought, this time be definite formula for street
building lightly departed from, which would assure the
most suitable rock the satisfactory binding material and
uniform per yard for construction Of plain work sources OF
supply aspects topography being equal at all times
regime H. f. Cooper in the Public Works Oce TWO
ways making tried Kaakaua avenue The plan was
the The highway has had long test and IN
spots than tina have been built since
by other plans The that have the original plans
all the necessary data in hand and II kaakua
rebuilt would the lessons already learned from the
Cooper be applied? The Star does not they WOudn
be- But if they the would not surprise
observer intelligent writer this subject in the morning
paper says: .....,- ...
Our material for roadmakng 1t soon turns
makes admirable road
weather
this wasn't lava rock thrown out for coral long
ago. Yet is being used right along if experience taught nothing
Is this good business policy? .......
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
LITTLE INTERVIEWS

fault. The weather outside is rough
but the Mauna Kea will get through
all right
E. p. IRWIN-It seems to me, iudg-
ing by the comment have heard, that
the Rev. Gulick has started some
thing" There will be a number of
people heard from IN reply to his
statements that the hula can not be
spoken of in respectable society, and
that the Japanese geisha is not de-
cent.
DOCTOR PETERSON-If l could
have had some of the members of the
Legislature here during the storm, in
the old asylum building that was con-
demned eight years ago, they would
have been ready to vote money for
new buildings,-provided that after
the storm they were in such condition
that I could let them leave the asylum.
WALTER f. DRAKE see by the
calendar that my successor has time
to catch the Wilhelmina and should
arrive the day before Washington's
birthday with the Shriners. His first
days work will be holiday. 1t was
on a Washingtons birthday that the
man who installed me in the internal
revenue office left Honolulu.
R. E. LYONS, of Los Angeles-IIo-
nolulu doesn't impress one much on
approaching. But after we got ashore
Mrs Lyons and myself took a drive
in the residence section. doubt
whether there is anything to equal it
for beauty in the world. Honolulu
needs only enterprise and money to
make her a great city.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07

W. d. ADAMS-Where else could
you get a box from which to hear
Calve for only $50?
A. B. LECKENBY-Th Australians
treated me very we'll but the customs
and the money bothered me a little.
JOHN HUGHES-The Floral Parade
is growing larger every year and a
great deal of hard work is involved.
JOHN D. CLEARY-Its only little
more patience for us and then Ireland
will be at the end of her long struggle.
JOHN WALKER-After the Burns
banquet, / saw a Scotchman, an Irish
man and an Englishman together. Can
you beat it?
JOHN w. CATHCART-I wish
could say something brilliant. Then
l would get into the Stars little in e
terview column. But I can't.
SUPERVISOR HARRY MURRAY
We should appoint Link McCandless
superintendent of sewers and water
ways on the other side of the island
to keep the roads from being flooded.
PRESIDENT GILMORE-The cattle
that are coming on the Lurline for
the College of Hawaii, though not
fancy-priced, are among the best 20
be found in the California market.
w. H. HOOGS-The new SUPER
visors have been in office over q
month, but l don't zee anything done
regarding the down town streets
which are in an outrageous condition.
PURSBR PHILLIPS, of the Mauna
Kea-We are in for a rough trip this
time unless all indications are ut
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
Uncle Walt
The Poet Philosopher

The I day is right side up with
the good old pipe beyond repair The house
10 is filled with smoke from basement
THE UNIROKEN the tiles; the wife, who used wheee and
vow choke beamng with smiles. She often
on the back, finding in reach,
and says that I'm cackeracb, ooloo and peach tell my
neghbors how quit that habit obscene preach until have
fit against Old Nicotine. bore friends with many spiel
until their bosoms bleed tell them all how good feel since cut
the weed But often when alone with whom
wiring Oworn hands and grOan, sigh and walk the
feel though I'd gladly swpe a widows house lot if
that would bring the good old pipe the pipe that hit the spot!
Copyright 1870 by GEO. Matthew Adams WALT MASON
will be around with useful Repub
lcn convention.
The troops in and taking their
nothing else
What has become of the bubonc that exploited few
years ago?
few big rains would Justify ifesavng the
Waikiki flats.
Will the of hghvng be increased by Yok 5Sstory
building?
Madame Cave have enepsng press agent with her.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
FAMILY FINANCIALLY SHOULD A HUSBAND HELP HIS
7&BOyd EA&8I8

only makes them the more dependent
If. however. it is matter where
temporary help will be of great as
sistance, such as sending a brother
in-law through college, or helping a
sisterin -law to some special course
of instruction, let it be done in a
business like way, as a loan. The boy
or girl will be the better for feeling
that when the returns come from their
studies, they must pay back the one
who helped them.
But if it is a case of simply max
ing sacrifices without any hope what
ever on a return: as in the case Of
an invalid, or an aged father-in-law
or mother-in-law, it is matter then
of simply being unselfish, or shoulder
ing the added burden and trudging OH
cheerfully with it, It is a case of
playing the man. And any man who
is man and who loves his wife will
do it. 1t may seem hard, and no
doubt it is hard. But somehow or
other, when one does a thing for
love, no matter what sacrifice it may
entail, it sweetens life. SubtlA in
tangibly, but none the less truly life
becomes the richer and happier for it.
RA.<~.4- /a-T<
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07

In addition to bringing in 6842 bags
of H. A. sugar the Mauna Loa reported
81 1888 bags of sugar awaiting shipment
on Hawaii, made up as follows: Ho-
nuapo $3.50 bags, Kukuihaele $500
bags, Honokaa 1000 bags, Paauhau
II 800 bags, Paauilo 1900 bags, Ku-
kaiau, T. H. D. 4511 bags, H. H. 4O79
bags, and Kailua 1868 bags, total of
1898 bags.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
ANNUAL MEETING.

EVA PLANTATION COMPANY.
Notice is hereby given that the An
nual Meeting of the shareholders of
the Eva Plantation Company will be
held at the office of Castle & Cooke,
Limited, at the corner of Fort and
Merchant streets, in the City and
County of Honolulu, Territory of Ha-
wall, on Thursday, February 23rd,
1911, at 10 o'clock a. m.
T. H. PETRIE,
Secretary, Eva Plantation Company.
Honolulu, February Z, 1911.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
JUST FOR A CHANGE.

Honolulu has been experiencing the
annoying features of San Francisco
weather for almost a month; it's un-
pleasant and inspires one to leave
for a more agreeable climate. Haleiwa
offers all the heart of a visitor to Ha-
wall can crave. The hotel is con-
veniently located near the trains
with mountain or sea scape from
every room. Splendid cuisine and ser.
vice and the center of a locality
rather famous for its beautiful drives
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
ANNUAL MEETING.

WAIALUA AGRICULTURAL COM
PANY, LIMITED.
Notice is hereby given that the An
nual Meeting of the shareholders of
the Waialua Agricultural Company.
Limited, will be held at the office of
Castle & Cooke, Limited, at the cor
ner of Fort and Merchant streets, in
the City and County of Honolulu, Ter
ritory of Hawaii, on Friday, February
Gath, 1911, at 10 o'clock a. mo -
T. H. pETgIE,
Secretary, Waialua Agricultural Com
pany, Limited.
Honolulu, February Z, 1911.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1911-02-07
ANNUAL MEETING.

PONAHAWAI COFFEE CO., LTD.
The Annual Meeting Of the stock
holders of the Ponahawai Coffee Co.,
Ltd. will be held at the office Of its
agents, C. Brewer & Co., Ltd, in
Honolulu, on Wednesday February Is,
1911, at 1870 o'clock A. M.
H. NJ. WHITNEY,
Secretary.
Honolulu, T. H., February 6, 1911