The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1911-08-24

A-N mus sf-+s. 70 promote
Or else hen not a-Aourt TO much
When mother gees TO vote.
FROM TIE HICKEYvILLE
CLARION.
II il wasn't for the home made obit,
nary poetry, there wouldn't be nuct
Te2l, original humor IN this country.
Grandpa purdy went TO church in tht
rain last Sunday and Is now at home
suffering from tnfammatory religion
Jed FTin}l, II gentlemanly and con
genial blacksmith, has just completed
& new set Of false teeth for Grandma
Purdy.
Uncle Ezra Harkins is getting to be
quite an author. He has had tive
recommendations for Binks' Tonic ac-
cepted and published lately.
Hank Tum1ls fell down the back
stairs one day last week and broke
three ribs and five commandments sim
infamous and at the same time.
II Hanks says when he dies he
wants the Hickeyvtlle Silver Cornet
band 10 play At his funeral. and then
everybody will be sorry he is dead.
Bige Tiplms has got a new GO II p
Panhard roadster. His wife has also
got a machine which occupies all of
her time and attention. 1t is a Singer.
Deacon Purdy has two sons who are
down to New York. One of 'em is
writing poetry for q newspaper and the
other n amt maxim any none
either.
Miss Amy stubbs, our village mill
liner. has got a hat so big around that
She can't take holt of her feller's arm,
when she is walkin' with him on the
street.
a representa- a nursery
firm was through here last week, but
he didn't do much business, for the
folks around here have got about all
the kids they want.
Mrs. Late Purdy appeared at the
party last Thursday evening with n
OF them decollette ovn on. Her hus-
band can't make much more than a
bare living for her.
Hank Tumms stole the sheet iron
storm out'n the opry house to
patch up his tin roof with, and now
they can't have any show with un-
pleasant weather In it.
Abijah Wicks, the proprietor Of the
Huttei Hickeyvtlle, is lookin' into
some of these advertised schemes to
will work on hutte1 butter.
Rodney Binks' son Horace writes
home from New York that since he
moved his new th-ree-cornered pianner
into his flat. he and his wife have to
board and room outside.
A drummer from Chicago was In our
midst the other day sellin' goods. but
we amt heard whether he was a bass
or a mar drummer. Miss Amy stubhs
our village milliner, says every rum
mer is a snare and a delusion and a
snare.
-
KEEP COOL
Don't let the torrid atmosphere of sum-
mer worry you, but Just
Keep cool.
Don't let yourself be ruffled Up. ex-
cited or unduly fused.
Keep cool.
Don't scold about the price of Ice or
meat, 0 r anything like that.
Don't worry over little things or insti-
tute a family spat
Or lose your temper uselessly and vent
your feelings on the cat.
When everything e. earth goes wrong
and things are not what they
should be.
Keep cool
Remember how Cap. Peary fought the
icebergs In the polar sea.
Keep o
When asphalt pavement seethes and
boils and stone sidewalks reflect
the heat:
When ii is possible TO hroil beafsteak
right IN the brick-paved street:
Don't a V and swear n tear vcn1r
hair and spoft q disposition sweet.
Keep cool.
When collars Wilt and perspiration
triekles down your manly back.
Keep cool.
When. YOU feel very sure. ere long
your dome Of thought is going to
Keep cool.
Though others rave about the heat and
are beyond all measure fused.
And though the weather bureau IL
cutie properly n~aaisgaed and
We don't know how you,Il do 1t, b,,t,
remember, Of all things, you must
Keep cool.
ACCORDING TO UNCLE ABNER.
Tho way Of the pants presser is. hard
The harem skirt covers a multitude
Of shins.
Old Hi Perkins Is a man OF vern
reg'lar habits. He gets drunk every
night.
Many q man earns his bread by TIN
sweater his frau. Lem Purdy,s wifi
takes In washin'.
BY gravy. it seems to be more of 1
disgrace TO have a 1910 model oatn,o.
bile than to have none at all.
Rev. Mr.. Binks has the shingles