davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

D HOENIX, Ariz.-Come to Arizona
to die and get buried cheaply. The
Maricopa county board of supervisors
has just closed a contract with a local
undertaking firm whereby those who
die in such circumstances as to ne
cessitate burial by the county will be
laid away decently at the expense of
one mill per person. This includes an
upholstered redwood coffin and full
funeral service.
Four FIRMS bid for the county bust
ness, and none may be said to have
sought to exact an exorbitant stipend.
The highest price asked per corpse
was $4.25, while one firm offered to
do the work for 10 cents each and
another for one cent. The firm bid
ding one-tenth of cent was the 'low.
est responsible" bidder and got the
business.
1t might be gathered from this that
Maricopa county is such a healthy
place that no one ever dies. But not
only do persons die here, but they die
by scores.
The county burial bill, even at one
mill, will in the twelve months for
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Theatre Managers Hard Luck

The managers Of the Gayety Theatre
In Paris have found themselves placed
In dilemma by the persistency with
which a horse continues to put on
flesh. The horse at one time was a
candidate for the knacker's poleaxe,
but fate was kind to him. The man
ayers Of the Gayety were about to
stage Massenet's new opera Don
Quixote" and they cast about for a
horse that could play the role of Rosi-
nante, the hero's charger.
Paris was ransacked for an animal
lean and miserable looking enough,
and finally they found a worn out and
decrepit steed. He duly made his first
appearance in the part and was a
great success. But the actresses Of
the Gayety, letting their pity get the
better Of their discretion, offered the
horse food, which he greedily devour-
ed In such quantities and to such good
purpose that to the CONSERVATION of
the managers he gradually grew fat
ter and fatter until he became alto
gether too sleek and robust for their
purpose,
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
BuriaIs Cheap in This Arizona Town

/ which the contract IS made, run up
into several dollars. This Is due to
the fact that Phoenix, the seat Of
Maricopa county is a famed resort for
tuberculosis victims.
Behind the bid lies the reason. It
is worth something for the undertak-
ing firm to get its name in the local
papers every time a pauper dies. At
the same time, one can never tell by
the appearance a living man presents
what his estate will divulge It has
been demonstrated that not only do
the undertakers who have the county
contract not lose money, but actually
make a good profit In addition to the
advertising.
1t frequently happens that one case
makes up for the losses on a whole
years contract and leaves many other.
cases of supposed indigents to create
a handsome profit for the business.
The contract at one mill per corpse
means that the dead wagon must go
for the body and remove It to the un-
dertaking establishment. There It
must be prepared for burial, the firm
supplying all the essentials. 1t must
then be transported to the cemetery
and inferred
There have been cases where under
takers have kept bodies for six months
while they sought throughout the
country for someone who would pay
a fair expense bill for the funeral In
most Of such cases they are ultimately
successful.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
NOT ACCORDING TO PROGRAM
Practical Joker Meant to Abolish
His Wife, and Doubtless
He Did.

When the first shipment Of frozen
eggs arrived from Australia their ex.
treme hardness astonished the brok.
ers.
One man, calling at a brokers' Office,
was amazed 10 see him taking aim at
the wall with an egg.
What the dickens are you att" he
said.
But the broker let drive, the only
result being a slight dent in the wall
The thing being explained. the man
took a couple of the eggs. put them
In his pocket, and left to startle his
wife Arriving home, he waited till
the family was assembled for dinner,
and then banged an egg at the new
dado.
But the smile quickly faded from
his face. The egg had thawed.-Lon-
don Tit-Bits.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

ing about as she talked and reducing
the chaos to order. You're Miss
Goosie, all right, all right-trying to
put it over me that way, when you
know / know you so we'll"
Hush! won't hear such language!
[ don't see where you ever learned it,"
Mrs. Ray interposed despairingly.
Sybilla looked contrite and ran to
her mother, pushing her down into the
easiest chair and smoothing her hair
deftly.
Mrs. Ray got up, saying, irritably,
I will go upstairs-but mind, Mabel,
Il you keep Peter too long can't do
very much. That left side-form has to
be set in differently and without you
to fit it on"
Il know! I know! Only CO." Ma
bel interrupted
AS her mother vanished in the wake
Of Sybilla, whose arms overhowed
with inchoate finery, the minister
knocked. Mabel welcomed him warm
ly-she had warm heart toward any
man who admired her, 30 warm, in
fact, 1t was three hours before she
let Peter leave, notwithstanding the
state Of the pink silk frock.
"You can finish it by twelve o'clock
tonight-and Wen sleep late tomor.
row." she explained when her mother
complained of wasted time.
Sybilla, who had just come in, stood
with clenched hands. you know
mother ought to be in bed early" she
said, her voice singularly restraincS
"And she shall be there, too-even
you go to the hop in your old blue
latan."
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Al 2W YORK.-That New York City
~ has nearly reached its maximum
Of growth and will find it's supremacy
as the biggest city and the most i'm
portant commercial center in the west
ern world threatened by competitors
during the next thirty years is the be-
lief of Walter Laidlaw, secretary Of
the New York Federation of Chris
uan Organizations and a census ex-
pert of note. DR.. Laidlaw frankly sets
aside as preposterous the commonly
accepted estimates of the tremendous
growth of the city in the next three
decades and prophecies that in 1910
the population will not exceed $780,
900.
In a long report on New York's
Future" DR.. Laidlaw notes that the
two greatest causes of the city's rapid
rise to pre-emtnence were the build
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Enaland,a Oldest School.

A controversy has arisen in England
as to which school has the right to
claim greatest age. There are two
schools which were founded in the
early part of the seventh century-the
Kings school, Rochester, and the
Kings school. Canterbury. Justus, on
his appointment to the see of Roches-
ter in GOA, made provision for a school
in connection with the cathedral. Au-
gustine established the Canterbury
school about the same time. st. Pc
ter's at York dates back to the eleV-
enth century.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Country Aghast at Opium Consumption

about 60,000,000 consumes only 10000
pounds. as against the 100000 pounds
actually accounted for IN this coun-
try; in Italy, with a population Of
SS,O00,000. the consumption is about
5000 pounds; in Austria-Hungary,
whose combined population is nearly
| 50,000.000, the annual consumption
does not exceed 1000 pounds; Hol-
land, with a population of 100000.
consumes 1900 pounds annually
In Europe there are 145,000.000
people who consume annually only
about 10000 pounds OF the drug, while
our population of 100OOO,OOO, by i'm.
port figures. consumes more than ten
times that amount, 10 say nothing OF
the vast quantity that is olandestineiy
brought into the country"
President Taft urges immediate ac-
ton TO check the growth Of the evil.
There is now pending in both
branches of congress measure,
known as the Cullom-Foster bill, TO
control the trafhc by Bubjecting II TO
heavy internal revenue taxes. The
bill also provides for a practically
prohibitive tax-S200 a pound-on
smoking opium. The control of other
forms, principally morphine, will be
more difficult, # is conceded, although
It is said that in that form the drug is
most widely used.
The highest medical authorities es-
innate that $4,000 pounds Of opium
should suffice for the medical needs
Of the United States yearly, and that
fully rs per cent Of the 100000 pounds
imported Is manufactured into NOR
phtpa
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

OMAHA, Neb-In addition to music
~ having charms to soothe the saw
age breast" it has been discovered
that 1t has the power to bring about
verdict in the courts. This has been
demonstrated in Judge Sears divi
sion of the district court in this city
The case on trial was one wherein
a wife was suing for $4,000 damages.
The allegation being that a saloon
keeper had sold liquor to the plain
tiff's husband until he had become a
drunkard. H. G. Murphy represented
the plaintiff and A. H. Murdock and
A. c. Panacoast were attorneys for
the defendant. The testimony had
been introduced, when Murphy an
nounced that, instead Of arguing the
case, he would read the "Drunkard's
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
BY MARTHA M. WILLIAMS
lcopyrlght l0ll. by AgaoeIatod LILerary Pressl

sybilla burst explosively into the
sitting room. shouting subduedly:
"Motherl Mab Everybody! The
now minister Is coming-I saw him In
the lane-and you know the road
doesn't 90 anywhere else"
Dear mel And this room in such
a clutterl" Mrs. Ray cried, dropping
her sewing and glancing at the shreds
Of pink silk. the tatters OF tulle and
snippets Of gauze that Uttered the rug
and chung wispily to everything.
THAT frock does look dance-y," &"
Sybllla commented-but over her
shoulder-she was on her knees gath
ering up the offending shreds and
tatters. But don't you worry. mother
LIN whisk everything out Of hight.
Besides, believe his reverence will
be so taken up looking at Nab he
won't see anything else-not II It was
as big as a grown dog"
"Hushl You dreadful child" Mrs.
Ray reproved
Nab, the beauty OF the family, pout-
cd yisibly. Il do hope he won't stay
long. II he does my new frock will
never get done in time" she said
anxiously.
Sybllla laughed outright, saying pro-
yokingly. And II II shouldn't-why,
tho Hampton pound cake may turn
out all dough-"
Mabel flushed angrily. you de-
serve to be sent to boarding school
only you're such a savage you might
disgrace the family" she said severe
ly. Then she turned to her mother.
why can't you so upstairs and sew?
m make out you've got a headache
and send the Rev. Peter Benn away
In a jlffy."
you ask me to do everything ez
cept your lying" Sybilla bubbled, her
ayes dancing. Il like Peter Benn.
Why don't you leave me to entertain
him? He's almost as nice as a big
healthy two-weeks' old calf"
you forward thing!" Mabel eiacu-
lated. Mother send her upstairs. If
you don't she'll make me cry"
No she wont-crying makes red
noses for little Mabel-and she doesn't
want even a minister to see her so,
5ybilla flung back undaunted. whirl-
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Bernhardt's Callers at Stage Supper,
Boston society in the audience at
Bernhardt's performance Of Camille
were surprised at the familiar look
Of certain of the dinner guests In the
first act.
1t happened thus: Some young men,
who had met the divine Sarah In
Paris, called on her at the theater
AS they we're in evening dress 1t was
suggested that they have supper with
Marguerite Gautier. They became
actors at a moments notice.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Queen Marx,s TrOusseau.

Queen Mary is following tho eX-
ample set by her mother, the duchess
of Teck, who at the time of her dadgh-
ters wedding with the present king
declared that for the trousseau mot a
yard of cambric or linen, Of flannel or
tweed, of lace or ribbon should be
bought outside the kingdom" and who
kept her word. Queen Mary is hav-
ing her coronation robes and gowns
for court functions as well as the
opening of parliament gown made by
q British firm of all British material
She has ordered eight dresses so far,
and work on them has commenced
London Correspondent New York Sun.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
A Dry Wash.

Representative Livingston Of Geor-
gia, who, disgusted at the bath-tub de-
bate in the house recently, proposed
that little money might be made by
renting the bath tubs out, said recent
ly, apropos of this subject:
1--WE are now a good deal like Bill
Spriggins on a zero morning.
Bills valet entered his bedroom
one January morning and said with a
sbiver:
VIII you take your bath hct or
cold ,sir?'
"'Thank you said Bill; I'll take II
for granted"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

"Hello what makes you so elated?'
called to my friend, the jokesmith.
"An editor has sent me congratula.
tions," he replied, with a joyful smile
Congratulations on what% / ex
claimed with wonder, for / well knew
the kind of stuff he was in the habit
of turning out.
"Oh, my work, of course" my
friend replied with some heat. I'm
returning fifty Of my jokes he con.
graduated me because none Of them
was based on inothers-in-law, tramps
or boarding house hash"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Real Courage.

He was the small son of a minister
and his mother was teaching him the
meaning of courage.
"Supposing," she said, there were
y boys in one bedroom, and IL
got into bed at once, while the other
knelt down to say his prayers, that
boy would show true courage"
oh said the young hopeful, Il
know something that would be more
courageous than that. Supposing there
were u ministers in one bedroom,
and one got into bed without saying
his prayers!"' %
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
No Purchase Recorded.

There was a dealer who tried to sell
a horse to the late Senator Daniel OF
Virginia. He exhibited the merits OF
the horse, and said, This horse is a
reproduction of the horse that General
Washington rode at the battle of
Trenton. 1t has the pedigree that will
show he descended from that horse
and looks like him in every particu-
lar"
Eyes, so much So" said Senator
Daniel, that l am inclined to believe
1t is the same horse"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

II wonder why Mrs. Flimgilt regards
her husband as stupid. He has been
very successful in business"
Perhaps" replied Mr.. Meekton,
he's like so many of the rest of us
who can't possibly learn to keep the
score of a bridge game"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

They were in despair, being loath to
discard the animal, for he was a good
actor Finally they mastered the diff
ticulty by painting false ribs on the
animals hide in order to give him the
necessary appearance Of sorrowful
emaciation.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Mems Clothes.

Since 1926 the clothing of men has
grown simpler and simpler, and If the
cause Of evolution has taken away
erom the picturesqueness Of the crowd
Il has added to the dignity Of the
Eaan.--Men's Wear.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

trouble In all its
dreadful forms Il;
shooting pains an
lover my body, sick
headache, spinal
weakness, dizziness,
depression, and
everything that was
lhorrld. i tried many
doctors In different
parts Of the United
States, but Lydia E.
IPinkham's Vegeta-
Ibln Hovnnoupd haa
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
literary Atmosnhere.

Mark Twain was not a widely read
man. How do you suppose he ever
managed to turn out so much good
stun?"
81 don't know unless it was because
he smoked so much"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Many Of the horses raised in Prince
Edward Island are noted for their en-
durance and swiftness, and they gen.
orally command higher price than
those Of the other eastern provinces
Of the Dominion of Canada.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
cIvlno Him the Worst Of II.

Saying you can't beat corpora
aon is all wrong. Why, whenever
my factory whistle blows it tells the
time Of day to lot of persons who
don't pay me a cent for IT,"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Wanted to Mend a Tire, Maybe.
We sent Charleston waffle to New
York, but, Of course, some postal clerk
could not stand the temptation, and
he took it.-Charleston News and
Courier.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

The big stone had rolled to the bot
tom Of the hill again, and the bystand-
ers were jeering at Sisyphus.
Boys" he groaned, tackling it once
more, IF you can't boost, don't
knock!"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Ready With Proof.

An earnest preacher in Georgia, who
has a custom Of telling the Lord all
the news In his prayers, recently be.
gan petition for help against the
progress Of wickedness in his town
with the statement:
20 thou great Jehovah, crime is on
the increase. It is becoming more
prevalent daily, I can prove 1t TO you
by statistics. "-Eyerybody's Magazine.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Love does not depend for It's
strength on concentration.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Tightness across the chest means a cold
ON the lungs. That's the danger signal.
Cure that cold with Hamlins Wizard Oil
before it runs into Consumption or Pneu-
monia.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

No man has come to true greatness
who has not felt in some degree that
his life belongs to his race.-Phillips
Brooks.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Talent earns what the world gladly
gives to tact.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

The recording angel may take more
interest in your day book than in
your hymn book
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

No harmful drugs in Garfield Tea, Ma
ture's laxative-it is composed wholly of
clean, sweet, health-giving Herbs!
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

The percentage Of infant mortality
In New York city was greater last year
than ever before.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

Your working power depends upon your
healthl Garfield Tea corrects disorders Of
liver, kidneys, stomach and bowels.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

To correct disorders of the liver, take
Garfield Tea, the Herb Laxative.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

One might fight lie and still not
follow the truth.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

He who cannot do kindness without
a brass band is not so scrupulous
about his other dealings.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

done more for me than all the doctors.
l feel it my duty to tell you these
facts. My heart Is full of gratitude to
you for my cure."-Mrs. HARRIET E.
NAMPLER, 524 S. Ransom Street,
Ottumwa, Iowa.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

PILES CURED IN 9 TO IA DAYS
YoNr druggist Will refund money II PAZO ONT.
MBNT fails to cure any Of Itching, Blind
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
OTTJJMWA
WOMAN
CURED
By Lydia E. Plnkham's
Vegetable Compound

Ottumwa, Iowa.-'For years / was
almost q constant sufferer from female
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03

The bill collector is also a settle
meut worker.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Consider This Advlce.

No woman should submit TO a surgi-
cal operation, which may mean death,
until she has given Lydia e. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound fair trial.
This famous medicine, made only
from roots and herbs, has for thirty
years proved to be the most valuable
tonic and invigorator of the female
organism. Women residing in almost
every city and town in the United
States bear willing testimony to the
wonderful virtue of Lydia e. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound.
Mrs. Pinkham, at Lynn, Mass,
invites all sick women to write
her for advice. Her advice is free,
confidential, and always helpful
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1911-03-03
Innnrtant 70 Mnthars

Examine carefully every bottle OF
CAsTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
infants ald children, and see that it
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1911-12-28
Farm Home DESTROYED.

Antler American: Early Monday
morning the fine farm residence of
Dan Manning, living mile and half
northwest Of this city. was destroyed
by fire and almost the entire contents.
Dan had built fire in the kitchen
stove about o'clock that morning and
had returned to bed to wait until the
house warmed up somewhat before
getting up for the day, but shortly aft
er returning to bed he heard cracking
sounds coming from the kitchen and on
opening the door wall Of flames met
him and prevented him from closing
the door. He at once awakened the
other occupants of the house and.
scantilly clad, they tried to save any :
thing they could, but the IRE had al
ready gained such Roadway that ID
was impossible to get anything OUT
with the exception of the piano which
was in the front part OF the house and
was quite distance from where the
fire originated.
The loss to Mr.. Manning will be
considerable, as he only carried 81, 900
insurance 500 on the building ana
$500 on contents.
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1911-12-28
CIGAR STORE TO MOVE
Broadway Cigar Store viii Move from
Present Location as Soon as Suit
able Quarters Can be Found.

The Broadway Cigar store. next the
Pirie cafe. will probably move in the
near future, just as soon as a more
suitable location can be found. Just
how soon that viii be depends entire
ly on how quickly quarters may be
secured.
The Frances suit and cloak house,
which is now located on First avenue
north, will go into the rooms now oc-
cupied by the Broadway Cigar store.
The latter has vet lease of fourteen
months on the present location dating
from Jan. 1, which will be taken over
by the Frances just as soon as Rein
ecke & McCone vacate
1--WE will move the Broadway just
as soon as we find a suitable loca-
tion.'' said Mr.. Reinecke to a Forum
representative today. THAT may be in
six weeks, six months or Immediately
though at present we have no definite
place in view
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1911-12-28

A coroner's jury sitting at Barnes
VILE, yesterday afternoon, touching
the death of Mrs. Ellen Nyeng, 70
years of age, at her farm home, Christ
mas night. returned verdict. after
thirty minutes elaboration, in sub
stance that the woman met her death
accidentally. The woman's son who
was under arrest in connection with
the rather mysterious death of his
mother was Immediately released after
the verdict of the jury had been prop
erly signed and delivered to Coroner
Vincent.
In substance the son of the dead
woman. Lander Nyeng. S9 years OF
age, told the jury that he and his
mother left the house about o'clock
Christmas night, for the barn to milk
the cows. A few minutes afterwards
he went to the back door where he
found his mother lying on the ground,
her face and head covered with
blood. He summoned medical aid and
everything possible was done to alle-
yiate his mothers sufferings. She
PASSED away about IL o'clock the same
night. Mrs. Nyeng and her son had
been living on the farm about four
years.
The testimony of the doctor in the
case was to the effect that the post
mortem disclosed conditions which
seem to be contra to the story told
by the dead woman's son, The doc
tors report stated that there was a
clot on the brain, there was some
abrasion over the right eye, the wom-
ans nose was broken, two ribs were
fractured, there was a cut two inches
long on one Of her limbs and her
knees were bruised.