Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-05-07
KEG F|NNEY, CRITIC
He Finds Fault With WastefuI
Hero in MeIodrama.
THREW AWAY GOOD BULLET
Might Have Killed the Villain With
His Cigar Just as Easy.
FAT WOMAN BOTHERED HIM
Spoke of Manners and Such Things
When He Went Out to
Get a Drink.
THREW AWAY GOOD BULLET
FAT WOMAN BOTHERED HIM

l\eG Finney pulled from his pocket
something he had purchased under the
broad term cigar, and as the first full
pun of smoke waited into the face of
Shorty Ferris. who sat on the fish wharf q
edge. that latter shad trainer ducked his
head slightly and spoke:
Il was 10 the thee-ayter last night
tour rows from the front. Twenty cents
They was a girl in the show Her boss
got stuck on her. He was one Of these
yer fresh guys. He come to her house
dressed up in these yer ridin' pants.
Ihems tn kind o. clothes that always
goes IN TIL first act of one Of these yer
stories of workin' girls.
This yer fresh guy tried TO tell this
girl, Mile Milestone, that he'd give her
bunch o money If she'd run off an
marry him. Old man Milestone was
Strong fer tn fresh guy, whose name was
horace lie Claire. | think the old man
must o looked on Horace as sort o
, meal ticket. But Mile was stuck on a
Young teller named John Anderson that
druv a truck fer the same store that
Mile worked in and which was owned
by TINS Yer fresh guy Horace.
John on the Spot.
That truck driver was certainly some
lover. He come in at the front door les
as Mile was tryin' to escape from get
tin kissed by Horace lie Claire's patent
leather mustache. and the way the truck
man swung on Horace was a reminder O.
III days when prize fightIn' was on tn
level. Jes' as ole man Milestone come
In wearin' his carpet slippers to borrow
couple o dollars off Horace. the hero
stood out in the middle o the stage wit
one O. them arms O. his'n around Mile
Horace come to. wonderin' IL he'd been
caught in landslide, and caught sight
of the two of 'em.
Who is that man. shouts Horace
John Anderson, the honest truck
driver says John. imitatin a statcher
Beat it, yells old man Milestone, try
in to stand In good wit Horace
If he leaves this house. 1 go wit
him, yells Mile.
Then go, ye ungrateful wretch
chimes in tn old man, griffin his teeth
wit tn thought of tn lost meal ticket
And jes' tn honest truck driver
and his best girl made a grandstand play
at the parlor door, the orchestra strikes
up somethin' fearful, and Horace lie
Claire pulls out a seegar and starts a
smokfn' it,
She Mentioned Manners.
81 fought fat woman next to me
Mike, stop cryin' madam. and femme out
gotta get drink seq to her. and she
durn near gets me wild hatpin I come
back eatin' a pretzel, and she says some
thin about manners. II I'd OF had q
boat hook I'd Of torn her main deck off.
The next act shows up Horace lie Claire
right. 1t seems he had been stringin' one
o these yer swell DANES whose neck and
shoulders have never known tn feelin' av
clothes. AS Mister Beelasco would say.
she was discovered smokin' cigarette.
and wonderin' what she would do now
that Alice had died
1T turned out later that Alice was a
white poodle. Horace come in. A Prince
Albert, gray pants and yaier shoes. Some
class!
The swell dame went after him from
the gong. Somebody'd told her this guy
was chasn' a shop girl and she got SO
mad about it she was jes' about to slit
him open wit a fruit knife that she ca
ried tucked in her chest. when in at the
door rushes Mile Milestone, carrying
eighteen boxes o. hats. 1t seems she got
a new job in a swell millionairy store,
and was deliverin' $50 lids at three a