davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Excuses.

Following are a few of the reasons
advanced by patriotic officeseekers for
deserving to serve their country in the
field of diplomacy These three actual
excuses, and we have culled them from
letters kindly shown us by the secre-
tary of a certain Ohio congressman:
81 have a big family to support, and
I believe that the perquisites of the
office would enable me to pay my
debts"
81 speak twelve languages, and
find no market for them in this coun-
try"
81 am in i'll health, and my physic-
ian says nothing will help me but con-
tinued residence abroad"
"My parents were born in Europe
and it was their dying wish that
should reside there for a time I con-
slider this a sacred duty-will my
country put obstacles in the way of its
fulflllment?"
81 will accept any post where the
climate will ameliorate my rheuma-
tism, which | contracted while stump
ing the country for Taft"
In our humble opinion, the last ap-
plicant should get a job. He is a gen.
ius.-Cleyeland Plain Dealer.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

1t would be jolly to have a real coun-
try servant! She would be simple and
young and unsophisticated. So re-
'freshing, after the way in which their
London domestic had lordered the en-
tire family
Her name was Elsie, and she turned
out to be very simple and very young
and very unsophisticated She had
never seen a carpet sweeper or heard
an alarm clock, and she stared in open
mouthed establishment when her mis-
tress lit the gas stove for her in the
kitchen.
But she declared stoutly that she
would soon grow accustomed to hey
new surroundings and her mistress
ileft her to work them uot herself.
"How do you find the kitchen
ranger" asked the mistress at the end
of a week.
Deed, mum, it's lovely" replied Ell
sic enthusiastically 81 never seed a
stove with less trouble to it! Why
the fire you kindled for me when
came is still Albumin, mum, and It
'asn't lowered even once!"-Answers
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Americas, Ga, June Is, 1911.


@++%*%% + = = = =
y WHAT TO FORGET. =
p = + 4 y y y 4 = = = 4 +
Let US forget the things that yexed and
and tried,
The worrying things that caused our
souls to fret;
The hopes that, cherished long, were
still denied us,
Let US forget.
Let us forget the little Sights that
panied us,
The greater wrongs that rankle
sometimes yet;
The pride with which some loft one
disdained US,
Let us forget.
Let US forget our brothers fault and
failing,
The yielding of temptations that
beset,
That he, perchance, though grief be
unavailing,
Can not forget.
But blessings manifo i, past all de-
serving
Kind words and helpful deeds, a
countless thrOng,
The fault o'ercome, the rectitude un'
swerving,
Let US remember long.
The sacrifice of love, the generous Civ
ing,
When friends were few, the hand
clasp warm and strong,
The fragrance in each life of holy liv-
ing,
Let US remember long.
Whatever things were good and true
and gracious,
Whater of right has triumphed over
wrong,
What love of God or man rendered
precious,
Let US remember long.
Exchange.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
The Difference.

Representative Macon, at a dinner in
Washington, condewned taking, says
the Philadelphia Ledger.
AN explorer especially should not
fake" he said Explorers adyen-
lures are so Incredible, anyway, #
one of them takes to taking how shall
we believe the rest?"
an fact, the difference between the
true and the fake explorer is very
hard to distinguish. It's like the diff
ference between economy and vaga-
bondage.
The man who lives on almost moth
ing, you know, is an ECONOMIST, while
the man who lives on nothing is a
tramp"
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
CATCHING SHAD BY
HAND IN QUAKERDOM
SO Plenty Below impossible Dam as
To be { Prev,

To be Prey.
York, Pa, June 15.-Many hundreds
CT shaj were landed by fishermen at
McCali's Ferry today in the closing
hours of the 1911 shad fishing season.
The sight was witnessed by throngs
of spectators on the York county
shore.
Just bolnw the great dam of the
Pennsylvania Water and Power Com
pauy, the shad, which have been I'M
able TO get over the inadequate tishway
to spawn in the upper waters, were
clustered so thick that many were
caught by hand. Small boys seized
fish wcigf ing from eight to ten pounds
and Dluckily held on till they landed
them, though frequently carried into
deep water. This manner of taking
the fish eyades the fish law, which pro-
hibits the use of a seine or dip net
within 400 feet of a dam
Another form of sport made possible
by the great number of shad was the
spearing of the fish on gait hooks.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
THE GEORGIA PEACH AND THE
CAROLINA SUBSTITUTE.
Wilmington, n. c., Starr

The Americas (Ga) Times Recorder
remarks; Soon the luscious water
mellon will be a thing OF common en-
ioyment.' Well, with a Georgia wa
termelon it might be common enjoy
ment," but it is different when a fellow
lis trying to get on the outside of one
CT those .sugary, nectar-layored speci-
mons grown around Wilmington, he
has to so slow or else he will swallow
his tongue OF course people at a dis
lance have to be deprived of the enjoy
ment of our honey drippers, for the
rind is so thin an ordinary jolt cracks
it and out comes a flow of delectable
juice that would make a Georgian s
nair curl till he wouldn't know him
self
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Every Morning Except Monday.

All Subscriptions Payable in Adj
vance.
Advertising Rates promptly furnish
ed upon application.
All advertising copy requiring two
columns of space or less should be in
the business Office not later than noon
of day prior to date of issue in order
to insure its prompt insertion. All
copy for space of more than two col
umns should be submitted not later
than o'clock of the day, two days
prior to date of issue.
Memorial Resolutions, Resolutions
of Respect, Obituary Notices, ETC.,
other than those which the paper may
deem proper to publish as news mat
ter, will be charged for at the rate of
3 cents per line.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Somewhat Mixed.

A little girl on Carnegie avenue does
no know which she adores most-her
father or mother says the Cleveland
Plain Dealer She initiates each in
turn, and sometimes she gets her i'm
itations mixed.
What is the name of the society to
which your mother belongs?" asked a
visitor the other day.
q forget 'zact name" frowned the
child, but l think it's the Continental
Damns."
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

= STORIES
y WORTH READING.
4 4 4 - 4 I 4 Z Z 4 Z Z = Z Z :
Thai Was All He Wanted.

A certain alderman spent good
deal of time about the polling place in
hNis ward. With him part of the day
was his son, bright-faced chap OF
about twelve During a lull when no
voters We're in the room, the youngster
wandered in and soon became engag-
ed in conversation with one Of the in
spectors. Asked for his views on the
contest, the boy said: Il hope we
win this election because papa wants
Sunday baseball
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
4 \ 4 y 4 4 \ 4 \ 4 \ + + \ 4 4 (
= IN ABSENCE. 4
Chicago News.)

The house is drear and dark and lone,
The kitchen and the hall,
And in the living room, own,
There seems no light at all;
Upstairs or down It's just the same,
No joy close by can stay
For pleasures blind and deaf and
lame
Since mothers gone away.
The flowers in the garden sigh
And droops each pretty head;
Somebody speaks to me, and |
Must wonder what was said.
The whole place has downcast air;
The bluest skies seem gray,
And there's one more than empty chair
When mothers gone away.
I think it may be good for US
From her awhile to be;
We get true perspective thus
And judge her rightfuliy
She is the queen of all the earth,
A queen with loving sway,
All. Well we know her sterling worth
Since mothers gone away.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The witnesses in the steel trust in
vestigation acknowledge that the mon
.ey power is in the hands of one man,
such as Morgan holds, could be a per-
petual menace to the business welfare
of the nation. But of course they all
maintain that Morgan uses it judic-
iously and patrioticalIy-and piles up
more and more millions for himself in
cidentally
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Sympathy.

Missionary explaining to visitor)-
Our situation was so remote that for a
whole year my wife never saw a white
face but my own.
Sympathetic Young Woman-Oh, the
poor thingi-BOston Transcript.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

By the time the government turns
over its receipts and money making
power to the proposed reserve corpor-
alton a few men will have the country
in sling. .sf
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Why She Wouldn't Travel.

Mrs. Dart-Ny husband is just beg
ging me to take that trip around the
world, but I can't.
Mrs. Upfatte-''Why not?"
Mrs. Dart always get dizzy when
| travel in a circle.-Pathfinder.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
A Work of Genius.

An ideally brief and delightful adj
vertisement comes from a London shop
window. 1t runs: Our trousers, five
shillings a leg All seats free. =
Youths Companion
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
OF Snme Imnortance.

First Office Boy-The boss called me
in consultation today
Second Office Boy-G'wan!
First Office Boy-Fact. He had q
dispute with the junior partner as to
who wuz leadin the league just now IN
battin'.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

A teacher asked her class in SPELL
ing to state the difference between the
words results" and consequences. >
A bright girl replied, Results are
what you expect, and consequences
are what you get."-Harper's Bazaar.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The Board of Education is determ-
ined to maintain the high level of ex-
cellence in the teaching staff of the
High School. That institution is rap
idly becoming a model one for the
state.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

A 'womans club up North has slated
for a topic: Should a man lie
around the house The average man
has to in order to keep peace in the
family, especially when he comes home
after midnight
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
OF Course,

Hoax-Every outgoing ship the past
few months has been fairly crowded
with newly married couples.
Joax-Yes, the Atlantic Ocean is
being crossed in love quite frequently.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
She Called Him.

Mr.. Justward-Say, dearest did /
ever he'll you about irhe handsome
heiress who once wanted me to marry
her?
Mrs Justward-No, love, dont
think you've ever told me lie as yet.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Teddy would make an interesting
witness in the steel trust investigation.
''W7hy / set aside the law" would be
the topic under discussion.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Madge-What is Dolly's ambition IN
life?
Marjorie-She hopes to marry a
millionaire and save him from the dis
grace of dying rich-Life.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The contest is over, the prizes
gone to the hardest and most success
full workers, and the dead level OF
summer dizziness is on us again
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

THE receptive spirit is chronic
among Georgia politicians" is the way
the Wilmington star comments on
Gov. Smiths senatorial attitude.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

It is now suggested in the North that
Migrants be colonized Try them on
the New England deserted farms. The
South doesn't want that sort of col
onists.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The Wilmington Star advocates a
back to the farm" movement for the
people who want to keep hogs and
COWS inside a city's limits.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

According to the New York Herald
women's feet are growing larger The
shrewd shoe dealer will simply lower
the numbers on the shoes he sells
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

With bumper crops of cotton, corn,
oats and other products of its soil-ex-
.cept peaches-what can stem the tide
of prosperity in Sumter
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The gun club tournament will draw
many crack sohts to Americas. 1t will
be another medium for advertising the
most progressive town in this section,
Everything helps and the Gun Club
will do its full share in boos ing Amer
fcug.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Women frown down on men wearing
shirt waists and then clip few more
holes in their own tissue paper cover
ing
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
+ + \ y = \ + y \ + \ \ \ y \ y =
= 4 WHOLESOME REMEDY. !

y A WHOLESOME REMEDY. \
= y y = 4 ~ i ~ =
%. Simon Sam, in New York Times.)
Miss Mary Elizabeth Madeline Fayles
A girl about seven or eight,
Had cherished the habit of biting her
nails,
And practiced it early and late.
From such an absurd and ridiculous
trick
1t was not a long time before
Each delicate finger-tip down to the
quick
Was painfully tender and sore.
Elizabeth's father declared 'twa a sin
Such beautiful fingers to spoil;
And big brother said, with comical
grin,
Lets smear them with capsicum
oil"
So capsicum, aloes, and pitch were ap-
piled,
And vile things too many to name;
But Mary Elizabeth silently cried
And nibbled her nails just the same
Then Mrs Fayles said, with delight in
her voice.
I've thought of a cure sure as fate!"
She tried it at once and had cause 10
rejoice;
The nail biting ceased from that
date
What potent device did this fond moth
er use
In curing the trick of her pet
Twas simply an artifice, stratagem
ruse--
She bought her a manicure set
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

= SOME
= MORNING SMILES.
= = = = = = : : = = = = :
His Chance.

Mrs. Blowit--I see by this magazine
that wearing hats makes ones hair
gray.
Mr.. Blowitt-Well the expensive
ones that you have been wearing have
made my hair gray.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

If you really feel uncomfortable read
Dante's Inferno. This climate will
seem absolutely cool and pleasant,
then.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The devil asks no salary, because
he likes his work so much and it is so
easy.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

If a mans family includes a wife,
three grown-up daughters, and a
mother-in-law he has no earthly use
for a monograph.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Lemonade is refreshing and health
full. That's the reason the price Of
lemons is almost prohibitive
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

A higher tax on tobacco is now
suggested The ultimate consumer
continues to get it in the neck
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Summer weather with cracked ice
on the side is a cool proposition.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
Tom Hudson will get there.

To the average man life consists of
one bill after another
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

You can tell a philosopher by the
way he isn't when the time comes Tor
him to be.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The quest of riches brings many o
bitches. i
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

Too many fiirtations spoil the mat
it's a sign he is no genius.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
= \ 4 \ \ y ~ + = = \ \ 4
WEATHER FORECAST

= FURNISHED Daily by U. S. De- =
\ partment of Agriculture) =
= Forecast for Americas and vi =
= cinity: Generally fair. =
= \ \ \ \ = \ y \ y \ y \ \ =
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16

The only fast color is red hair.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-06-16
OFFICIAL ORGAN:
City of Americas.
SuDotar, Comfy

Webster County.
Railroad Commission of Georgia For
Third Congressional District.
q. S. Court Southern District OF
Georgia.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-01-29

the other hand. 1t Is contended that
even constitutional right may be
so used as 10 be made a part Of
a conspiracy prohibited by law
Still further, it is argued that
business is not a property right,
but rather mere abstraction in
capable Of judicial protection. This
proposition is opposed also.
Before the Injunction OF the orig.
lnal court had been passed on by
the higher court, the Bucks Stove
and Range Company complained that
President Gompers, Vice President
Mitchell and Secretary Morrison
had violated its provisions by com
menting publicly on the effect OF the
injunction They were brought into
court and held to be in contempt.
Now it is argued in their behalf
that the lower court had not issued
valid injunction and that they
could not be punished therefore, for
disobeying 1t. That 1t was not a
proper injunction is shown. Il is ar
gled, by the fact that the higher
court modified 1t.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-01-29

attended the university and was one
of the organizers of the college liter
airy society for girls, the Zetalethean.
The final preliminary in which the
men are to be chosen who will rep
resent Oklahoma in the debates
against Colorado and Kansas in April
will be held in the university chapel
Saturday night, February 4. Ten con-
testants have come successfully
through the first trial and will con-
tend for the six places on the debat-
ing squad. They are without doubt
the best rostrumites in the university.
1t is extremely doubtful if ten men
better equipped as to logic, oratory
and thorough understanding of all
the requirements that go to make up
the ideal debator could be found in
any university in the west. Certain
it is that Oklahoma has never sent
better contestants into the field be-
fore. If the school does not defeat
both of the big sister universities on
the rostrum this year it will be be-
cause they are stronger in debate
than they ever were before. The ten
contestants are Streeter, Speakman,
Tom Mayfeld, Z. NJ Castleberry, NJ.
o. Ellis, ]. L. Highsaw, J. NJ. Wallace,
p. d. Erwin, Frank Balyeast, J. A
Dickey and /. L. Williamson.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-01-29
SCHOOL
VzNoTES
-
A. & M. College.

Saltwater. Okla. Jan. 2S.-The bet
ter seed AMI live stock train left
saltwater last Tuesday morning. The
train is accompanied by eight lectur-
ers who will be on regular duty until
the end OF the trip. Those who lee.
ture on live stock are, Professor Jas
Wilson, director Of the experiment
station, and Mr.. Marl Woodson, as
sistant in the demonstration farm de-
partment OF the board of agriculture.
The lecturers from the A. & VI. col
lege on seeds and farm crops are
Professor T. NJ Jeffords of the depart
ment of agriculture for schools; Pro-
fessor c. Z. SanbOrn of the depart
partment of entomology; and A. c.
Hartenbower of the department OF
agronomy. r. c. Potts, professor OF
dairy husbandry. lectures on dairying.
Lectures on horticulture are given by
y. o. Booth, professor of horticul-
ture. The lectures on agricultural
and educational exhibits are J. S. Muir
ray, state superintendent of county
farmers institutes, and ]. c. McMan-
us, assistant state dairy commission
er. Hon. R. F. Wilson of Valiant,
member Of the state board of agricul-
ture was selected TO go through with
the train on its entire tour. President
] II. Connell OF the A. & VI. college,
was unable to accompany the train
on its first few days out but will join
il later. The exhibits on the train
consist of pure bred live stock, dairy
products, machinery, general college
exhibit of scientific equipment, charts,
models and apparatus. In case OF
cold or rainy weather, the passenger
coaches will be used as lecture halls
as stops are to be made regardless OF
weather conditions.
Mr.. and Mrs. Bentley announce the
birth of a son. Mr. Bentley is a mem
ber of the 10 class and is at present
a prosperous farmer at Charley. Tex
as.
Mr.. ]. L. McKeown, financial sec
retary of the college, was in Oklaho
ma City last week on college bust
ness.
II. ]. Baade, 10, who has had
charge of the high school at Wynne
wood, Oklahoma, since last Septem-
ber, resigned recently to accept a
similar position at Big Timber, Mon
tana, where he received substantial
increase in salary.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-01-29

homa. He has been lecturing under
the management of the university eX-
tension bureau. He delivered lect-
ures under the auspices of high school
and city organizations at Eufau,a,
Muskogee, Oktaha, Wagner and Nc
Alester. and preached in the First
Presbyterian church Of Enid on Sun
day morning of last week. The lect-
ures were all well attended and much
interest was manifested in the uni
versity by high school students. Pres
ident Evans says that the high schools
of the state have reached a high
point of efficiency, that the students
are taking the utmost interest in their
mid-term examinations which are now
under way, and that the graduating
classes in all parts of eastern Okla
homa will be larger than in the past.
This makes a big freshman enroll
ment from the east side certain for
the university next September.
The Sooner basket ball team leaves
tomorrow for an eight days invasion
of the Sunflower state. The red and
white cagers are in splendid trim, as
was shown by their recent one-sided
defeat of the Central Normal leather
tossers. They should at least win the
odd game of the seven they are sched-
ulei to play, even though the battles
are to be fought away from home.
Many of the fans are claiming an
even better break
William Sterling BATHS, the great
Dickens impersonator, appeared be-
fore an audience comprising almost
the entire student body at the Fran
ing opera house Friday night. His
entertainment was the third number
of the lecture course and one of the
most popular ever given here.
F. S. E. Amos, private secretary to
Governor Cruce, is former protes-
sor in the university; while Mr.. Par
sons, assistant
A gloom was cast over the uni
versity last week by the sudden and
unexpected death of Mrs. Walter C.
Erwin, wife of the professor of educa-
ton. For the four weeks prior to
her death she had been bedfast with
typhoid fever, but was thought to be
much improved until shortly before
the end came. Mrs. Erwin was one
of the most popular of the faculty
ladies of the younger set. She once