Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-03-25


Law Courts Branch Of the Home Counties
Bank. When you come home. which I
hope will be soon. / want you to take
this money and administer 1t for her
benefit. The rest Of my property-nothing
to speak OF in comparison-is set down
have left in the hands Of Slocum, Sphinx
& Slocum, Lincolns Inn Fields, and can
not be touched until my death Is au-
thenticated. I have made you Joey's sole
trustee and guardian. and you will enter
upon your duties as soon as you get nome.
She is not to come of age. financially
speaking, until she is twenty-four.
'.That's all. I think.
''Good luck to you In life. Hughie! ]
can't, 1 fear, take my stand on the pin
down advice to you on your way up;
neither will I presume to counsel you as
to your future. My only piece Of advice
to you Is not to expect much in this
world. and then you won't be disap-
only three things in life that matter
health. money and friends. woman
once told me that the recipe for perfect
happiness is q million pounds and good
digestion. The last. I admit. Is indis-
rable interior is dyspepsia proof. The
million pounds you have not got and
don't want. Wealth. after all. IL q pure
ly relative affair. You can measure II
either by the greatness Of what you have
or the smallness Of what you want. All
insure his getting the second. and I am
inclined to think that in your case this
should not be q matter Of much dimculty.
Besides. it is in the small needs of life
house in town, the grouse moor-who
wants 'em? But the cab home in the
rain; the occasional bottle Of Pommery;
the couple Of stalls when an old friend
looks you UP, or the furtive and sympa-
thetic flyer when his widow does-these
worth having. Besides. the greatest joys
are those you have to save up for, SO q
millionaire can never know them.
LAS for friends-well, there are two
trouble you about. II you haven't &C
quired the knack Of handling them during
the last ten years you never will and are
no Marrable. Women? I give 1t up!
You can't standardize them. Men are
fairly normal as class. II you deal
appreciate the fact, and though he may
not respond by dealing straight with you,
he will at any rate recognize you for what
you area white man. But you can't de-
far stronger in their likes and dislikes
than we are, and are hopelessly capri
cieus into the bargain. My general ex-
perience-and 1t has been wider than you
might think-haS been that, once q woman
takes a fancy to you, you may run
counter to every canon of honesty. so
briefly and common decency. and she will
cleave to you-probably. I fancy, because
you arouse all the protective maternal in
stinct In her. On the other hand, once
you get into her bad books-it may be be-
cause you deserve 1t, but as often as not
1t is because you have hot hands or once
trod on her skirt in q waltx-nothing that
you can do will prevent her shuddering
at the very mention Of your name. Per-
haps, from the point OF view OF the great
est good of the greatest number, q wom-
ans method OF sizing up the male sex is
the best possible, but It comes hard on
well meaning but heavy-handed men like
US.
1--WE Marrables have always been mems
men. although we have the profoundest
reverence for women. perhaps that ID
the reason-a woman never wants you to
reverence women: she wants you to rev.
erence herr What sticks In our Threats
, fs the enormous amount OF make-believe
and shilly shallying that has to 60 on be-
tween the sexes before any definite busi-
ness can be accomplished Whenever I
see q Marrable in q drawing room. sitting
on the edge Of . chair ana balancing Z
teacup. always know exactly what he IL
there for. and I also know that he Ii
dumbly resisting mans primitive instinct
to pick up the right girl and run. When
that feat. or its equivalent, has been &C.
known q Marrable who was not . com.
plete success as q husband But they are
bad starters
your father was an exception. He had
the good luck to meet Q girl who knew q
man when she saw one, aud Was willing
to accept the viii for the deed when she
found him unable to express articulately
what she would have loved to hear. BY q
further stroke Of good luck her parents
objected to him. so he had comparative
walkover.