Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1911-09-16
CHORDS AND DISCORDS

century, favored US with a call this
week on the afternoon before his lee
ture at the Illinois theatre. The doc
tor did not have any ice with him, but
he did have a good cigar. We asked
him If it was a north pole perfecto,
but he kicked US on the ankle and re-
marked that we ought TO have known
better than to have asked such a ques-
ton.
But you were at the pole, Doc, and
surely they smoke up there?"
Yes, my dear sir, but ii is impos-
sible to make cigars, for the good rea-
son that the union refuses to send any
Of its men into the region, as il has
not yet been admitted to the iurisdic-
ton
Admitting that you found the pole
first, what was there left for Peary
when he got there?"
you know, my home is in the east"
Doc diverted. Il am very fond of ap-
pies. I was Just reading the reports.
and was overjoyed at the prospect of
a bumper apple crop. And, too, kind
ly keep in mind that the bulk of the
crop is to come from my dear old New
England"
We didn't quite get the connection
between the apple and the north pole,
but the doctor-and this was the first
and only evidence of his having con-.
cealed on his person a few breaths
from the arctic regions-in neat sor,
of way let the fact be known that he
was not making street corner speeches
about his expedition conquests. In
stead, he slipped us a card giving the
hours Of his lecture and the prices of
admission
For all of which we were much
obliged But we came back by in
forming the distinguished caller that
we had pair in the third row, and
that they were given to US for the
purpose of getting our opinion on pa
per Of the doctor and his story.
Not an unkind word spoken, how
ever.
On the contrary, the doctor proved
himself a perfect gentleman. He was
dressed modestly, yet neatly. We be-
lieve you would call it business suit.
But We didn't like the big dark four
finland tie that the doctor wore He
had on a heavy vest. too And it was
a warm day-one of the hottest of the
week-yet he did not shed bead
How was the weather up there,
Doc?" we inquired.
Its pretty kinky."
What's the pole like"
Before the answer we discovered
that We had fooled once more. and
we hurriedly switched by calling the
doctors attention to the members OF
the Dubuque baseball team, who were
in uniform ready to leave for Island
City park.
The doctor said he was fond of base
ball, but he had been so busy keeping.
up his batting average on the lecture
platform. covering the chautauquas
during the summer months, that he
had missed out on the games in the
cities he had visited.
However, the doctor did not forget
to take a few wallops at one Peary,
whom he termed the king Of four
fushers.
While, primarily, the doctor is seek
ing public vindication, he is not cut
1AA46 AAC PIACSS VI duuIlSSlOu 10 MS lee
lures.
Why wouldn't it be a good plan to
talk to the schools and colleges, max
ing no charger"
The doctor SHE'D out of the corner
of his right optic, and took another
puff at his cigar
Remember, l have a family" said
Doc. Also that l am taking good care
of my wife and children. | wish | could
say the same of some other arctic
explorers" We didn't get that last
one, quite, and the doctor uncovered.
While the doctor admitted he would
love 10 spread his story before all the
people without charge. for the present
he was compelled, owing to the exac-
tons of contract with his managers.
TO get the change.
After which we shook and the doc
tor was on his way. We told him
about our high buildings, our beauti-
full parks. magnificent paved streets.
county jail, etc. and he promised to
see them all before he left our midst.