Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1911-05-23
JOHNS SENSE OF HuMoR'
BY RUBY BAUGHMAN.
Copyright, 1911, by Associated Liter
airy Press.)

Copyright, 1911, by Associated Liter
airy Press.)
Margaret was toiling along through
the Los Angeles chamber OF COM
merce behind her two prosaic KIN
folks. Like the humming drone Of his
own threshing machine, Uncle John
prosed over silly statistics and poky
processes. She was half-giggl1ngly
commenting to herself as she tagged
doggedly along after Aunt ELIAS am
ply constructed, black broad-clothed
form, that Uncle John ought to be
prosecuted for bigamy on the ground
that he had two times as much wife
as he had when he first married, when
she discovered two gray eyes, under
a broad hat brim, answering her
chuckles with wrinkly wrinkles.
The naughty disdain which she du'
tifully tried to spread over her amuse-
ment fell before the good-natured ap-
probation of her need of relief ex-
ipedition. She bowed. tentatively and
reservedly. The hat lifted in most
dignifed Acknowledgement and It's
owner advanced, holding out his right
hand. Margaret placed her brown
glove within his reach, with the affirm.
alton:
81 am very glad to meet you here,
very glad to see you again, In answer
to Aunt Eliza's backward look OF In
uuiry. The aunt's exclamation at
tracted the attention of Uncle John
Margaret led her new found friend
up to her guardians.
81 am glad to introduce to you
very old friend from Iowa. This Is ny
uncle and aunt, with whom am spend
ing nv summer vacation, Mr.. Living
ston."
Aunt Eliza only exclaimed again,
aloud, and started to say that which
Uncle John interrupted by an en-
phatic wave Of his big capable-look'
ing arm.
~ am delighted to know you, Mr..
Livingston: delighted to know YOU
Then taking an observation of the
young mans evident intention to fall
back in step with the niece he
reached forward firmly for the young
mans arm, pulling him into step.
"If' you are from the middle west.
most Of our agricultural processes
and products will be new and interest
ing to you. Now, here is" and begin
ming with a peroration about prunes.
based out of the huge elephant con-
structed out of dried specimens OF
that much derided boarding house IA
vorite-a frightful. wobbly-kneed ex-
annie of what industry, coupled with
violence Of imagination. energetically
mjsdirected, can perpetrate-- Uncle
John led him, by dried-fruitbound
paths into the mysteries of California
farming.
Silently. not to say patiently or re-
sentfullv. Margaret walked along with
Aunt Eliza. What profit from her
transgression if it not only furnished
no ESCAPE for her. but even afforded a
new sacrifice upon the altar Of Uncle
Johns zeal for acquiring and impart-
ing information. Piloted by Uncle
John. the humorless. the quartet stop
ped before model fruit farm worked
out in PAPER mache.
"This ranch, Margaret, which is
here reproduced. belongs to your
aunts nephew, Jack Jenkins. l have
asked him to take dinner with US at
the hotel tonight and you will meet
him there. He's a good chap. I never
caught him in a false position but
once. and then think the fault was
not altogether his
The young man with longing looks
toward Margaret, showed signs OF
breaking away from her uncle's re-
straining grasp.
"All he needs is a housekeeper -
wife, mean, home-maker, like your
Aunt Eliza's been to me" droned
Uncle John, stating that romantic
situation as one might speak Of the
number of seeds in prune elephant.
"But he is not much for women folks.
He says 1t takes him six days to figure
out what woman means by what she
says and by that time he's forgotten
what it was she said.
The man with the sombrero flushed
u,;t1, oho mo over this account OF 40