davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

gives one song number, accompanied
by barefoot dance" She has a
pleasing soprano voice and sings well.
The comedy honors of the bill are
easily captured by Shayne and King,
who not appropriately style them
selves advanced Hebrew entertain
ers." Their stun is new and appar-
entity original, and they are natural
comedians. Both can sing. Mr..
Shayne has faculty of throwing his
voice into a high soprano, which Is
much clearer than the average falset-
TO and Is really pleasing to the ear.
The efforts of the pair were most cor
daily received by Mondays audi
ences.
Frank Rutledge and company have
a rather entertaining sketch, called,
Our Wife," 1t has TO do with the
return of a lover thought dead. and
his chagrin is great when he discov-
ers that his sweetheart has welded
another. The husband cunningly man.
ipulates matters so that both his wife
and the intruder become disguised
with each other. and the threatened
breach in the household is averted.
j. X. Bradshaw, as Alphonse De Gran
der, the lover, shows real dramatic
ability. Frank Rutledge, as the hus-
band, and Grace cambridge, as the
wife, handle their parts well.
| The Misses Anna Armstrong and
Alma Fern have classy singing act.
The Girl, the Boy and the Piano
Miss Armstrong impersonating the
boy. They made hit. Monday. Rich
ard Hamlin, ''the medley man In
/ brown Is an excellent entertainer
| when he confines himself to dancing
He has a number of new steps. Ehren
dali Brothers and Dutton open the
show with a gymnastic number, Bits
4 from Circusdom," which Is worth
while. The Milescope shows Mutt and
1 JEFF In the banking business.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

CHICAGo--A bullet which passed
through the brain OF mad dog be-
fore it,entered the body OF Max Metel-
man. II is feared, may cause hydro
phobia
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

KANSAS CITY. Mo--women In
their zeal to get to lower floor In
"A department store. where handbags
were on sale. slid down the banisters-
Two women fought until separated.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

MATTEAWAN. N. Y.-When told
that her parents had been in an auto
mobile collision. Adele Courhi, eight.
was so badly frightened that she died
of shock.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES, hachoo. ha-
choo, h-choo," is the new yell that will
be adopted today by members OF the
Boston local" of the United States
Hay Fever association, which meets
on the mountains OF Bethlehem. N. H..
where II is never damp on Aug. 30.
II is a sure enough organization, with
headquarters in New York.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

CINCINNATI, O.-Carl Harel bet
James stephens cigar he could swim
the Ohio river four times. but when
he made the attempt he was seized
with cramps and was rescued by Ste
phens, who collected the cigar.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

PORTSMOUTH. O.-Ivey Bailey. II,
took rough on rats and then told her
relatives. who laughed at her, think
ing she was joking. The girl died q
few hours later, In terrible agony.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22
ODDS AND ENDS
FROM THE WIRES

NEW YORK-Because he did not
like the food served I'm a Brooklyn
restaurant. John Cook pulled a'gun'
and plugged the beefsteak full OF bull.
let's.
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. struck
Policeman william Lambert In his
home and cured him OF neuritis, from
which he had been bedridden for a
year.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

YOUNGSTOWN, o.-Practical jok-
ers poured whisky over A. b. Under
wood while he was asleep in a chair
and set fire to him. He was SO badly
burned he will die.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

worth OF damage. The loss BY fre
was t76.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

PITTSBURGH, Pa.-Charles Leise,
a butcher OF New Kensington, thinks
he has too much blood. He attempted
to bleed himself upon several occa-
sions and the police arrested him.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-08-22

LAKE MARIE. wis.-volunteer fire
fighters got in their awful work when
Tobey inn caught fire. They did $3.50
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10

Hank Snyder announces that he amt
going to eat amy more green corn, be-
ing as how the colonies get in between
his teeth and pry them apart and cause
them to ache him dretful
Anne Hillyer, our talented loryer and
legal light, almost had a serious fight
with his wife tother morning which
was only averted by the quickness of
Ame's trained legal mind Anne put on
clean shirt but couldn't find amy
buttons on it to button it up with. He
got real existed and hollered at Mrs.
Anne and Mrs. Anne she hollered back
Then Anne discovered that he had put
the shirt on wrong side out and that
the buttons were all there only under
meath. so it was all right, to the dis
gust of the naybors.
Miss Amelia Tucker, our reigning
society queen, entertained small party
of friends at her palashial home tother
ev'g. During TIE ev'g Miss Amelia per-
formed on the nelodeum and almost
everybody knew right away that she
was playing Home, Sweat Home"
Miss Amelia is getting to be turrible
talented on the melodeum. The party
left early, voting pleasant time hav-
ing been had by all
Abe Witherow was almost distrackt-
ed tother a. m, when he got up, being
as how he was unable to find his false
teeth, and mince pie for breakfast too.
1t finally come to light that on retiring
Abe had put his teeth in his right hand
pants pocket by mistake, he always put
ting them in his left hand pants pocket
over night A habit is certainly fun
ny thing.
Yves Woodruff, our expert hunter
and trapper, while cleaning up his traps
for his fall hunting, stepped in a fox
trap he had layed on the floor. 1t bit
Yves in the heel, yanl1ing the heel often
his boot. Yves was scairt almost to
death, and Topped into the air so high
he crushed his hat against the ceiling.
Sine Peterson of Sorrow Hollow
was a visitor in Bingville last wk for
the purpose of buying mother pair of
suspenders. Slime says he sweats SO
that his suspenders wear on him in nc
time 1t was only yr. ago last Jul
that Slime bought his last pair.
Dad Henderson found 1889 penny
up to his house tother day. Someone
told him il was worth $500 and Dad at
oncet began to fgger on what he would
buy. Meanwhile he wrote to man
that buys old monney and yesterday
the man that buys monney answered
his letter and said that the penny was
worth 5 cts. if it was in good con-
dishion. Dads first impulse was to
throw this penny into the crick, but bet
ter council prevailed, so to speak, and
Dad is now holding the penny for a
raise.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10

citizeness Mrs. Martha Tucker. Every
body was treated like queen, q light
collashion of doughnuts and tea being
had. The tea was lukewarm, but was
offset by the heat Of the day.
Mrs. Gookins is helping Mrs. Cy Hos
kins to red up her house during har-
vesting for SO cts. a day.
Bud Hinckley, who amt quite right
in bis head, was kicking stone down
Main St last wk when he kicked it
right onto Hank Dewberrys bunion,
who was coming up the street Hank
was hurt so bad that it was some time
before he could begin swearing, and by
that time Bud had gone thence from
there.
Lige Barker bit his corn cob pipe
, stem in two last Thursdy. Lige is
too tired, or amt got the time TO cut
another stem, and the stem is now so
short that it nigh burns of his nose
every time he smokes it.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
Locals

A maple tree has turned red over be-
hind Milt Gerrishes barn. How Is this
for tree turning red in Sept1
Miss Molly Tucker had a tooth
pulled last wk. She says the hole where
the tooth was feels so funny that she's
all the time ramming her tongue into
il and that every time she does she is
like to die laughing, it feels so funny
Amir Haines is suffering from tur-
rible cold in his head. He drunk al
most a at. of whiskey when It started
and got very hilarious and throwed a
lot Of truck at Mrs. Amir just for .
littel pleasantly. Mrs Amir retorted
by throwing the whiskey bottle outen
the winder and slsmming Amir on the
head with the tongs. Sinst then Amir
has done without medesin and his cold
don't seem to improve
Eph Higgins, our obliging P. NJ,
made out his report ending Dec. 81.
1910, tother ev'g, and found to his con-
sternashion that he was short one
cent stamps. He hunted all over the
place. but couldn't find hide nor hair Of
them, and finally put it in his report
that the rats had ct EN-.
The sewing circle met last wk al
the homelike home Of our well-knowu
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10

The citizens of this town are
grately exercised over the most re-
cent acktion of the School Board of
Bingville, composed of Cy Hoskins,
Deacon Butterworth and Lem
Brown, same being nothing more or
less than the dicishion that AS
tronerrny should be taught in the
Bingville schools now and hence
forth until someone else changes the
ruling of the school board or they
do it themselves.
This meeting of the school board
took place last Wensdy ev'g, it be-
ing a impromptoo affair, so to
speak, and held in the rear of Her
Weathersby's gen1 store. Lem
Brown he advanced the opinion
that the same things has been
teached too many years in the pub
lie schools of Bingville. and that
they ought to be varied and shook
up, as you might say, so as the
younger generation of Bingville
could be more culchured and more
polished. Deacon Butterworth he
thought so too, and the only dis
senting voice was Cy Hoskins, who
always dissents from everybody
on gen'l principals.
Lem was in favor of having
Manuel Training taught, and Dea,
con Butterworth wanted Sykology
taught, but they finally decided
that every young teller in Bingvillt
knew all the Manuel Training thai
was good for him, and that Sykol.
ogy was dangerous, being as how i
might put ideas into their heads
And, anyhow, neither of then
knew what it was. So they com.
promised on Astronomy, despit,
the copious dissenting of Cy Hos
k<ins, who bawled out about no
wanting it so he was heard all ovel
Bingville.
The arguments advanced by Len
Brown and Deacon Butterworth If
favor of Astronomy is that if any.
boldly knows about stars he car
find his way home IN the dark il
The was lost on a desert island OF
anywhere. Cy Hosl1ins said the,
wouldn't need Astronomy if the
was lost anywhere around here, be
kause all they would have to d.
would be to ask at house which
way Bingville was, whereas if the
was lost on a desert island the
wouldn't have no home, and woult
not have to find their way any
where.
Lem and the Deacon then tolc
Icy it was broadening anyhow, 81
to shut up argufying. Lem toll
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
cALAMITY coRNERs.

Ezekiel Snodgrass made a chair outen
a old Dbl tother day during the thunder
storm, and when he went to sit in il
the bottom fell out and Zeke fell
through, biting his tongue. Zel1e is tur-
rible handy with tools.
Pete Snyder layed In wait for q
chicken hawk that has been praying on
his chickens of late and he hadn't been
waiting more than 2 hrs. when the hawk
appeared Pete let the hawk swocp
down within IT, Of his big red rooster
and then off both bbls. of his old mug
eel loader shot gun at the hawk. The
kick near broke his jaw and when he
got up he seen that he had shot his
red rooster all to pieces and the hawk
had flew of. Better luck next time,
Pete.
Gid Hawkins has got Is bushels corn
he wants to get nd of at a price, also
a boil on his neck.
Bill Wilson lost the key to his house
tother day and broke a winder to get
in and after doing so found out the
door wasn't locked after all, he having
forgot to try it to see whether il was
or not, and also discovered he had put
the key in the sweat band of his hat,
SO that it want lost at all
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10

Hen Weathersby, prop. of our GEM
store, and as well-knowed to Bingvill"
folks as if they was his brothers, suf
fered feafful blaze in his beard tother
day which not only spectacular but
which nearly caused the death of our
genial dispenser of groceries, dry goods
and noshions.
Hen had been filling up his kerasene
Dbl, and in so doing had leaned his
head down so as to let his beard drag
in the drip pan which always sets I'M
der the spigot of the Dbl. In this man.
ner Hens beard become a regular lamp
wick, SO to speak, and was in a turrible
conflagrashious state.
No sooner had Hen got his back
Strengthened out after filing the Dbl
than he pulled his old corn cob pipe
often the counter and scratched match
on the seat of his britches and whisked
it up quick to light his pipe AS he
done so the flame often the match COM
municated itself as it were to his oily
beard, and the first thing anybody
knowed, Hens face had bursted into
| flames.
1t was a trying moment Miss Sa.
mantha Deevers, who has been on the
sick list regular, but who had venchured
out for a littel fresh air, was the first
to see the flames. She let out shrek
and immediately had a relapse and
| sprinted for home. Arowsed by her
shrieks, the people in the store turned
as one man and seen the horrible state
that Hen was in.
Hank Dewberry, who was busily en-
gadged in doing nothing on the front
stoop, grabbed up a handful of dust
and run in and threw Hen down on
the floor and rubbed the dust into his
face. Bale Hawkins, who was also pres
ent, grabbed up a bag of fertilizer and
droppit onto Hens face. Hen let out
a offul yell, and no sooner had he done
so than Jason Tucker, the valiant chief
of our FIRE dept, rushed in with 4
bucket of water and slung it all over
Hen.
At this point Hen riz up with one of
the most elolrwent streams of profanity
| the most elokwent streams of epitaf:
been heard in these parts The fire wa:
out, but Hens beard looked like a
wore-out scrub brush, and from his
speech he would rather of died OF
burning than be put out as he had. Hen
fred everybody out of his store and
retired to his home, swearing violently
and continuous. At this writing he has
not been able to wash or shave his face
and looks offai, but will suffer no seri-
Gus damadge.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
Country Correspondence
HAPPY VALLEY

We hate to see harvesting go, as "a
amt got nothing to look forward to now
except Christmas, Christmas being con-
siderable over mos. away.
Jim Snyder cornered woodchuck
under a fence tother day and doubled
up lot Of withes and showed EN- in at
the woodehuck so that the woodchuck
could bite on EN- and get pulled out
and killed, but the woodchuck over
reached and ketched a holt of Jim's
thum and bit it clear to the bone, Jim
was so sick and disguised that he tore
down the fence and while he was tear
ing il down the woodchuck run between
his legs unknown to him and escaped.
Jim says he hates woodchueks worser
than amy aninlile.
Miss Teenie Miller while cutting her
corns with her fathers razor had the
razor to slip on her, making big kniek
in same Her father was turrible mad
and said maybe she would like TO have
him give her the razor and use the saw
to shave with. When the razor slipt It
cut a cash in Teenie's great toe.
Mrs. Jim Wheeler has got a touch of
rheumatism in her right ear. This Is
a peckulier place to get the rheumatism
say we.
Benz Gibbs while milking tother ev'g
had his COW Bess to put her foot in the
pail Of milk without upsotting the milk
Benz. strained it and the folks never
knew the difference BENZ. said il diden't
taste amy more convey than ushual.
Miss Mary Ann Green of here is think
ing some of visiting in Bingville. II so,
Bingville girls had better look to their
lorrels, as Mary Ann is a turribIe fash
mater. EXCELSIOR.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10

Cy he was so narrow that anybody
could cut down a tree with him,
and this made Cy offal sore.
We think that this is the first
time on record where Cy Hoskins
has been right about anything. We
don't see how any good can come
outen teaching Astronomy in our
public schools.
It is true that Jed Peters, our
intelligent school teacher, when
asked by Lem Brown if he could
teach Astronomy, said he was a
grand little Astronomy teacher
and could read up more Astronomy
to teach in one night than he could
inkulkate into, the minds of the
Bingville youth in wks. or 1 mo.
Disregardful of this fact, we
done a lot of thinking about As
tronermy, and this is what we
thought. In the first place, the
stars, which Astronomy is a study
of, are so far away from Bingville
that no one is ever going to get to
same. Some of them are millions
of miles away. Some, it is true,
amt so far, but they are far enough
away so that they don't do us no
good. In the second place, nobody
has ever been to star. In all his
tory we defy any man to show us
case of anyone going to a star and
getting back to land alive. For that
reason we say that there amt any
one who knows anything about
stars.
All people are doing is guessing
when they tell you about what there
is on a star. If we tell you that
there are fellers on the star Venus
which wears their pants on their
ears because it isn't considered po-
lite to leave the ears uncovered
and which do their haying in Dec,
and which chew their food with
their hair and feed it into their
selves through their toe nails, yor
are going to say, Gosh, is tina
So" and go home and tell your
Iwife about it, but you amt going
to be able to prove that we are /;
liar.
That's the way with some Of
these here scientists. They tell u.
a lot of junk and we say, Gosh, il
that So" and they say, Yeah,
and everybody believes them, anc
what they say is taught in our pub
lie schools.
| For that reason we say stick tt
'lReading, Riting and Awrithmetic
sometimes known as the three Rs
and let Astronomy alone. 1
don't help to learn US anything
about the rotation of crops OF
where the cut worms go to. Sub
scribe for the Bugle. We give yo,
| all the news we hear, and our hear
ing is good.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
Cast in Her Bed

Granny Slocomb, who don't like
thunder storms, was sleeping in her
bed during that of last Tuesdy when
she was woke up by particular loud
crash of thunder. She jumped and
kicked out, and the rope under her bed
broke of, presipitating Granny onto
the floor amongst a melee of bed
clothes and mattress, where she was
cast for some time. Granny, thinking
she had been struck by lightning,
screeched turrible, arouzing the nay
bors. Even at this writing she amt
sure that she amt dead.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
Personals

The thunder storm of last Tuesdy
caused considerable rain to fall on the
roads and other places which alleeviat-
ed the dust and layed same.
Miss Nancy Green had peckuliar
thing to happen to her during the thun-
der storm Miss Nancy has turrible
lugshuriant hair, and when the thunder
storm was at its worst she was en-
gadged in combing it. The first thing
she knew sparks begun to come right
outen her hair and il riz right up on
end. Miss Nancy was so overcome by
this electrical demonstration that she
erawled under the feather bed. When
the storm had went by she emerdged
and resumed her hair combing and
found that the electrical disturbance
had ceased. $780,.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-09-10
Hollacowst!

Awe-Inspiring Conflagrashion In
Beard of WeII-Known Citizen,
in Which All His Hair Gifts
Singed OFF, He NarrerIy Escap-
ing a Fiery DeathI Read Ab't
Same:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-16
MUST NOT LOAN
YOUR WHlSKEY.
Against Law to Let Any One
Have 1t Except in Case of
Snake-Bitc
Especial to The Timcs.pispatch. !

Especial to The Times-Dispatch.l
RaleiSh. n. c., November 15.-Twcn-
ty appeals were disposed of with
opinions and otherwise, this weekly
delivery day by the Supreme Court.
The list follows: King VS.. Atlantic
Coast Line Railway Company. New
Hanover; new trial. Wacksmlth vs.
Atlantic Coast Line Railway Company,
Cdgecombc: no error. Carmichael VS.
Bell Telephone Company, New Han
over: new trial. Maynard w. Sears.
Wake: error. State VS.. Neville Ala
nance; no error. State vs.. Dove. Gran
Vile; no error. Patterson VS.. Trust
Company. Guilford: no error Thomp-
son vs.. Revolution Cotton Mills, Gull
ford; no error. Urquhart vs. Durham
and southern Carolina Railroad Com
pany. Durham; no error. Young vs.
southern Railway. Guilford: no error.
TrollinSer vs.. Flcer. Davidson: no
error. Jefferds rs. Albcmarle Water
Works. Stanley: affirmed. Curric VS.
fleer Davidson; no error. Goodman
VS.. Heilig, Davidson affirmed.
Pritchett vs.. Southern Railway. Ro-
wan: no error Davidson VS. South
ern Railway Company. Iredell: no trial.
Beck VS.. Bank of Thomasville. David
son: appeal dismissed. Baltimore VS..
Grubbs, Davidson: no error. State KS.
George Mitchell. Forsythc: no error
johnson vs.. Mutual Benefit Life In
surance Company. stokes: no error.
In state vs. George Mitchell. from
Forsythc. the court holds that the
loanng of whskey. with the under
standing that 1t ia to be paid back
with other whiskcy. makes the parties
guilty of selling. and that this loan
ing OF whiskcy could not he excused
under any circumstances save. posi-
nIy. IN case one is bitten by snake
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-16
NEW YORK rnonUCE M.nKtr

New York, November ia.--Fiour was
steady with fair Johhing t-,dc. Rye
Hour Quiet. Rye easy; No :? 81 no,uinul.
g l. I. Buffalo TO arrive. Buckwhcat flour
S2ej per 100 pounds. Cornmeal and barley
steady. Wheat steady; No. rcd. .7i.c
elevator cNpor, hasis tn arrive and $3.50
+. o. b. afoat. Options closed ,.ds higher
pocember. %; May. l.nil. Corn easy. new
export 69Nic {. o. b. anoat TO arrive. OPP
lions nominal. Oats steady: options nomi-
nal; Fork. beef, lard. petroleum. moiasscs
ana rice steady. Wool and rosin ouint
Tuipenttne dun. Sugar nominal: refined
easy. Coffee futures closed steady, I'M
changed to 20 points net advance: spot
quiet Rio No Z, ii5s I5c; santos NO I,
io's' MUD quiet: Cordova. IGN q1sIsc nom
mai. Butter setady TO hrm. Cheese irm
h.sss steady Potatoes and cabbaGes steady
unchanged. frciEhis ana peanuts un-
changed. "
Cotton seed oil was quiet but steady on
commission husc buying, covering of shorts
support from refincrs ana with the hrmncss
W h"I hf"ducis Closing prices were .a5
pn, POINTS net hlEh4r November. 5Si@5.sj:
,t",e nheF' ht9'ntI "a january, S.56m5.67:
rcpruafy. h.6om d'o March. 56Sm1.7q prim,
rude: ii'@ ga; prime summer yellow,
nSL q go; prime winter yellow. 65onsTo:
primo summer white. $50 bid
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-16
Chesapeake & Ohio Railway

$40 A.-Local-- Daily Newport News
1850 A.-Local.--D Daily Clv,lle. In. SUM-
Thurmond
1900 A.-EXpress-- Daiiy--Novfolk, Old Point.
1000 Locai--Daily-Lehbs. Lex. c. Forg.
'2:06 P.-Express-Daiiy-C melville
ti:0o L. --E1press-Daily-Nor y, News
5:l5 P.-Locai-Ex. Sun.-Gordonsvil!e
'5:l5 P.--Ltcal-Ex. Sun.-Lchhg, Natural
Bridge. clifton Forge
s5:35 P.DI.in.sed--Daiiy-t shcxh'ti CHICO.
-i:W MISUNDERSTANDING, L'v!ile
'Sleepers fParior Cars.
TRAINS ARRIVE RlCliMOND-Looal from,
East $50 a. NJ. 1850 r.. NJ. Through from
East: 1850 \. NJ, $3.50 i. NJ. Local from
West: $3.50 a NJ. $3.50 y. II. and 7:i5 p.
NJ. Through: 100 A. NJ 2:i5 p. NJ.
James River Line: ''S:35 a. H.. 6:i5 p. II.
''DaIly except Sunday.