davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
Popular Election of Senators

The effort to secure the direct cleo tion of senators has been going on from time out of mind and it bids fair to go on indefinitely, for the Senate has devised new and plausi- ble way of postponing it. At heart the Senate is opposed to popular cleo tions. It prefers clique elections, and one of it's number prefers jackpot elections. The latter voted boldly against any and all direct elections regardless of amendments. He knows a shorter way.
 The resolution was passed with the Bristow amendment sticking to it. The Bristow amendment was voted into the resolution by the casting vote of Sunny Jim Sherman, that incarna- tion of all things that are embraced in machine rule.
 The Bristow proposition is more cunningly drawn than the Sutherland amendment of the last Congress, but in effect both are one and the same thing. The Bristow proposition re- lates to amendments of Section 3, article 1, of the constitution, leaving section 4 untouched. Section reads as follows: "The times, places and manner of holding elections for sena- tors and representatives shall be pre- scribed in each state by the legisla- ture thereof; but the Congress may at any time by law make or alter such regulations, except as to places of choosing senator's By letting sec tion stand untouched Senator Bris- tow accomplishes about all that Sena- tor Sutherland aimed to do in the last Congress. Both, however, have one common purpose, namely, the defeat of any resolution providing for the direct election of senators.
 The resolution now goes to the House and really to the campaign of 1912. The House will undoubtedly re- | feet the Bristow resolution and until the people act in 1912 we have prob ably heard the last of the movement to reform the Senate. In the mean time Lorimer holds his seat and casts q vote against popular rule whenever opportunity presents itself.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
NOT so MARVELLOUS

From ftafper's Weehly'
 'I tell ye what it is, Silas,' said Uncle Nose Peavey, as he and the letter carrier sat together near the stove in the post office discussing things in general, "old Squire Dunkley's a-bustin' good shot with a rife. Ye' can talk all ye plea SC about these glass-ball shooters, and your various champeen shots down to the city, but there ain't many on 'em can shoot in the same day with the squire He kin hit dollar throwed into the air at 50 yards nine times out O ten"
 Yes, reckon he kin," said Sjlas. pull- ing strenuousy away on his corn-cob and asphyxiating the rest of the gather ing. but what if he kin? After all, Nose, you know as we'll as I do that a dollar looks ten times bigger to old Squire Dunkiey than it does to most O the rest on us."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
HOT WEATHER SUGGESTIONS

From Judges Library.
 If by some mischance you find yourseif spending the night at some spot where there are mosquitoes, comparatively easy way to render them harmless IS to seize them by the hind legs and tie tneir bills together with a piece of alarming cotr ton.
 sufferers from superfiuous flesh will find this an excellent month in whlcn 'o re- duce their weight The most approved method of doing this is to eat only one meal day. to run l5 miles every morn ing before .brealsfast, -.plava six sets of tennis in the forenoon, and to devote the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
Regarding Laundry Prices

My laundry bill is higher than it was two or three years ago." said a man who looks out for everyday economies. "l have lived in several cities, and l think it is safe to say that the laundry business in Birmingham is larger in volume than it is elsewhere, population considered. Owing to the smoke and grime which we naturally expect to find in an industrial center a great deal more washing of linen is necessary if one would keep up respectable appearance.
 .sWhen I first came here to live nearly 15 years ago the laundry prices, as l re- call them, were very moderate compared with what they are now. l think there have been two or three increases within the past four or five years. I like to see all business concerns thrive, but I think if the laundry companies were to charge little less they would still make big money and at the same time escape un- favorable comparison with the laundry industry in other cities.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
City Censor of Moving Pictures

Great Britain has censor of plays, and there is really no reason why Bir- mingham, America, should not tread in her ancient footsteps. Nor is there any known reason why Secretary Scudder Ryall should not be the new home censor. His decisions should all be reduced to writing, so to speak, in order that code of censorism may be built up here. Every decision will become precedent and precedent is to all intents and purposes a new law on moving pictures.
 Secretary Ryall should rise to the occasion. He should accept the prof fered place, and he should fill it to
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
Political Analogy

"In some respects analogy between
 the free silver craze andy statewide
 prohibition was quite marked" said
 Hiram F. Sweeny of Chicago. When l William Jennings Bryan made his cam l paign in 1s96, as the champion of free silver, the democratic party as a party shouted for 16 to 1 and the great mag netic leader.
 Four or five years ago when the anti-saloon league started its campaign | it soon became political and the most cunning wire-pulling known to the politician was made use of in the name of temperance. The anti-saloon league had many old politicians in the demo- cratic party bluffed, and the prohibition band wagon became quite popular in certain sections.
 Prohibition as feature of the dem oeratic party had no more merit or no more bottom to it than did the free out. Prohibition is still live question in many states of the south locally, but statutory prohibition and democracy have, in most states, parted company q was in Virginia recently and noted the changed sentiment there. Three years ago happened to be in that state and 1t looked to me then as if the anti saloon league would force statewide prohibition on the Old Dominion, but now local option is stronger there than ever, and here in Alabama no more will be heard of statewide prohibition. Ten nessee and Georgia are the only states with cities of considerable size that have statutory prohibition. but in Ten- nessee the prohibition law is a farce because the hotels have saloons and the retail liquor trade is carried on quite generally in the cities. It is the same way in Georgia, although the Georgians are even more liberal than the Tennes- scans in allowing beer to be sold under license.
 All right-minded men will be glad to do what they can to minimize the abuse of liquor, but sumptuary laws will never be regarded as reasonable by the masses and statutory prohibition as a political issue is certainly thing of the past"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

From the Louisville Courier-Journai.
 4 NEW idea of the new woman is
 "A given by Miss Lang who Is \ making a series of addresses to convince audiences that young women, and also old women, of course, would do we'll to drink whisky.
 When drinking advises Miss Lang, be modest and mannerly. Don't, as the un-. regenerate say, start anything" But by all means drink. The working girl should drink, or may drink, or shouldn't be blamed for drinking with her escort. The married woman, if not too newly married or too young, may drink in such company as she cares to select. But very young married women would bet ter not drink save in the company or an older woman-a more experienced woman presumably. In other words, one who knows how to carry load and Is equipped to give junior drinker reliable advice as to how far to stimulate with out endangerng dignity, physical or mental equilibrium, the rigidity of the muscles in the vicinity of the knees or her reputation for peace and quiet in the community ln WHICH sIie eahhs. An older consumer of the cup that in moderation cheers, and indulged in im- moderately doth oft inebriate, will know how to tell the earnest beginner how gradually to accustom her internal work irgs to a gentle fabrication with fusel oil so that she will not attract undesir- able attention by giving way to loud and boisterous laughter when there Is no cause for hilarity aside from general feeling of well being induced by the ef- feet of an alcoholic beverage upon an unaccustomed stomach. little compe- tent advice from one who knows tho ropes will save the fair tyro from burst ing into song in a crowded cafe, or weep ing copiously after the third orink pe- cause she has chanced to remember the untimely death of a grandparent who passed away during, or previous to. sher infancy.
 "Experience is the best teacher, ac- cordfng to an axiom to which most or us
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
LAcyGNErs FADED spLENDoR.


 IACYGNE'S FADED SPLENDOR.
 Tn paramount issue in LaCygne just DOW is: Shall LaCygne celebrate the Fourth?' There was a time when La Cygne was counted upon to celebrate the day and furnish entertainment for all the country between Kansas City and Fort Scott. Western Missouri and Eastern Kansas met at LaCygne on the Glorious Fourth assured that the town would sup ply all the modern amusement for such an occasion. It was the livelest town along the border in that day. and was headquarters for number of men who kept a string of race horses. The coun- try was patriotic, of course, and never dispensed with the reading of the Dec laration of Independence and the usual stunt of the ''orator of the day.v But the "exercises' were hurried along in order to give ample time for the races, the prin- eipal attraction. And everybody knew the names of the horses as the baseball fans know the names of ball players in this present day .Sorrel Nell' and Sleepy Jim' and "Grey Eagle had. their partisans as against Buckeye Bill" Ace of Diamonds and string Of other fa- nous runners that always helped to make able occasion" in LaCygne. The Frisco railroad regards the old town now as a whstling station,' but in the early day the Kansas City, Fort Scott and Mem phis had no more important town upon its map than LaEygne-Ka City'Star. PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
FATHER CARRIED TT

From Judge
 My father. says the host, carried that sword"
 The guest examines the blade with interest and discovers stamped state- Iaent thereon, to the effect that tAe sword was made in 1399
 What war was your father in?' he asks
 War? Oh, father wasn't in any war. He was travelling salesman for a regalia house.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
Western Union Delivery Charges


 When night letter telegrams are de- livered to my residence by Western Union messengers I am asked to pay an extra delivery charge" said prominent citizen who lives on the South Highlands. "I dc not think it right for the telegraph com pany to charge for delivery in residence section, especially when the section is nc farther away than Eleventh avenue north or south.
 'In New York Chicago and other great cities the telegraph companies have many branch offices and telegrams are deliv~ cred to residences promptly and without any additional charge. It might be well for the telegraph companies here to have a branch office at Highland circle. and perhaps at two or three other points But whether that would pay or no the extra charge for delivery should be dis continued at once.
 There Is much complaint in Birming- ham about the cost of living, and espe- cially about extras such as telegraph de livery charges. Certain it is that prices here should be no higher than in other cities of Birmingham's size"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
C pianola. He

pianola. He
 elevate, not the
 ms and when he has
 will have accomplished
 4 for thousands upon thou
 people who patronize pop .,riced entertainments. If the Ving pictures can be rendered bet ter and purer week by week the nov ing picture business will become ex- ceedingly prosperous and Daniel Froh- man will have another attack of the blues. It is up to Secretary Ryall, or rather will be, to bring about this desirable result. By all means let there be municipal censor. In time, perhaps, his duties will be extended to comic operas in the city's larger theatres.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR From tie New York Press

T 1TTI lNtFN The only tast color is red hair.
 Soft soap works only on a soft man.
 Sunday school lessons are almost as hard to remember as small change loans
 No man is ever late to meet a million aire and ever on time to meet poor re. lauon. The authority that man will obe, cheerfully is the kind that sfnashes him if he doesn't.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
osrEopATHIC VERSE.

The graduating class of Missouri school of osteopathy sang song during the commencement exercises. Here is the chorus; Now. if you want to fix dat disease, Come, get treated if you please Osteopaths, osteopaths, osteopaths,5
 Kirksville town. And here is health to the dear old doc-
 tor And all folks who follow after Osteopaths, osteopaths, osteopaths,
 Kirksvile town" At
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

masterpieces would have been; for un- happy master of a weird style of most brilliant conceptions, he was not unlike the oyster which, when wounded, pro- duoes rare pearls"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Before October in Mexico either peace will become assured or else there Will be another and bigger row kicked up.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

afternoon to some light exercise, such as walking, canoeing, or bowling. If, in addition to this, you will wear your win ter underclothng from the first to the thirty-first, and sleep in a featherhbed
 with an eiderdown quilt over you there is no reason why you should not take off several pounds,
 If your hotel room looks out oyer frog pond and the. bieating of the bullfrogs keeps you from sleeping at night you can of course, put a dynamite bomb fin the pond and blow it out of existence; but the more humane method is to stun your ears with cotton, close your win dows and sleep with your head buried under the mattress.
 The wearing of fur-lined overcoats at summer resorts at this season of the year smacks of ostentation and will be scrup- uously avoided by persons who have any desire to be de rigueur.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The Americans who remove to Canada are so good cosmopolitans that they there soon become good Canadians.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Three inches of LaFollette may be pompadour, but all the rest or nm IS uncompromising insurgency.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Oom Shelby Cullom is a candidate to succeed himself. He long has been. Tell US something new.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Clifford Pinchot is doing the laughing now. for the Cunningham claims in Alaska are to be thrown out as tainted with fraud.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Mexico has all sorts of trouble-earth- quakes and volcanoes as well as insurrec- tions and bandits.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Mrs Hartman rises up to remark that she has something else to do besides establishing great universities She de- nies the allegation altogether, whatever she may do to the alegator.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The further Diaz gets from Mexico. tie more popular he becomes there. This popularity is strictly long-distance matter.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The Mexicans should not. acquire the insurreetion habit. If they do, the auto cratic Diaz may come back.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

A man wears a belt and suspenders, and a woman sews buttons down the back of her dress, although she fastens it with hooks and eyes
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
FINE EFFECT.

"Griggs imbibes rather freely
 'Yes. Griggs says when his system Is illuminated he always feels that he's success in llfe''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

, nobility in London during coronatio[ week"
 "of course. it is something, but whether something worth while or not, depends al- together on your point of view"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

A temperature of s2 degrees is consid- cred a cool wave this summer.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
REVISED VERSION

Every little bit added to what you havs already misappropriated makes little bit more. &f
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The coronation will promote fashion arr ticles much more than poetry It may, however inspire Alfred Austin to write an ode or two.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
| last, at last he gan to fall.
BARRED our. WE HOPE.

According to all reports, the heavenly orchestra discourses sweet music"
 And why shouldn't it discourse sweet nusic? We have no reason to suppose that there are any steam calliopes, any trombones or any xylophones in heaven"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The iceman takes all spare money now, and there is no help for it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The optimistic live as a rule in town in which the home team is winning.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The breaking of the backbone of the summer is three months in the dim and distant future.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Ex-senator Clark of Montana says his modest New York home is assessed for a million foo much. He should consult Hetty Green in such matters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

Lorimer prefers to withhold his resig. nation until his term expires.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

The woodshed and the doghouse-gone, alas, and nothing except pergolas take their place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

It Is generally agreed that Chairman Underwood's report on the wool bill is yard wide.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

All dogs that walk abroad in the hot months should be adorned with a muzzle.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
pHuANTHRopTC TRICKsTERs

Capt. Hobson's Japanese war has either been mislaid or stolen.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

A heavan on earth I have won by woo. ing thee.
 --Alps Well That Ends Well.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
DIR. CUPID.

He kissed the grille once or twice,
 With expedition, And said, "I do this on advice
 Of my physician"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
DIREFUL PUNISHMENT.

He looped the loop with lightning speed, He sailed upon the wings of wind; huge monsters snapped at him in greed But still he left them all behind Now right side up, now upside down, He hurtled on through dizzy space, With phantoms black and green and
 brown
 He ran a terrifying race. His brain was sick. he strove to cry, But found the effort all in vain; So far away up in the sky,
 He could not see the earthly plaia. At last, at last he gan to fall,
 With quaking limbs and features pallid i; Then woke he up and loud did squall, . ''I'll ne'er again eat lobster saladi'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
FOOLISH VIEW OF NEW WOMAN

agree. But experience is no respecter of persons. Experience teaches one who has sat down upon the sidewalk midway between the cafe and the cab that nav igation' is impossible at certain stage of intoxication, but 1t does not call the cab prior to arrival at that stage of in- toxication until one has had good deal of it. It is, therefore unwise for 'un- chaperoned young married women,' as Miss Lang calls them, to drink unat- tended by natural guardian. such as husband or parent or some trustworthy person who knows the ways of the world and the vain and peculiar tricks of the alcohol microbe.
 It had not occurred to most of us that the alternatives athat women face are morphine and whisky. But this. Miss Lang intimates, is the case. The new women is stepping up and taking her place abreast of man. Drink or dope she will have. And little doping is a dangerous thing. Better cocktails, high balls and other mixed drinks, than opium pills. cocaine or Indian hemp.
 The view of many persons has been that the comparatively small amount of
 "social drinking" done by women in America is done as it is in Europe, not for stimulation, but for conviviality. Miss Lang's lectures do not leave the impression that this is her view. The modern woman, she thinks, wants bracer.
 How to diminish the evil of drink is large problem and an extremely inter- esting one. That it Is wiser to drink in
 moderation than to drink immoderately is andeniable. That it is better for the digestion, the purse and the morals to
 drink beverages containing small amount of alcohol than beverages con taining a large amount admits of no argument. But advising anyone or any class to drink is assuming serious re- l sponsibilty The reporters describe Miss | 1 ang as being twenty-one. Her advice
 is assuredly that of very young per 1 son, very much inclined to commit- the folly of rushing in where angels would fear to tread. N.4tsn Atsft s.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
A HAPPY END.

A HAPPY END. "Oh, death, where is thy sting?" ''Why this funereal exelamation?" q have just been reading In news- paper about a colored citizen who choked to death on a pork chop"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
WELCOME,

Thanks, little breeze! Your cooling
 breath
 Contrives to blow my cares away; Well pleased am I to feel your kiss Upon my fevered brow today. shall not mind, however much You toss my clippings all about If you'll but finger round while And put these pesky flies to rout
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

will be published .or's name. Rejected not be returned unless Aclosed for that purpose.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
 4 NEW idea of the new woman is "A given by Miss Lang, who Is 4 \ making a series of addresses to
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14
\ PRACTICAL PERSON.

A PRACTICAL PERSON. ''He quotes poetry by the yard.n ''If he tries to quote any poetry by my yard I'll sick the dog on him.
 SIC TRANSIT In poesy we'll take a whirl, My muse and I will frolic; A fellow kissed a chorus girl And died of painters colic.>
 SNOBS AND OTHERS. "It is something to rub elbows with the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-06-14

l Before October in Mexico either peace will become assured or else there will be another and bigger row kicked up. l The Americans who remove to Canada are so good cosmopolitans that they there soon become good Canadians
  Three inches of LaFonette may be pompadour, but all the rest of him is uncompromising insurgency. The Mexicans should not acquire the instruction habit If they do, the auto cratic Diaz may come back
  Dom Shelby Cullom is candidate to succeed himself. He long has been. Tell us something new. Mexico has all sorts of trouble-earth- quakes and volcanoes as well as insurrec- tions and bandits.
 -.s---- The breaking of the backbone of the summer is three months in the dim and distant future
  The woodshed and the doghouse-gone, alas, and nothing except pergolas take their place
 It is generally agreed that Chairman Underwoods report on the wool bill Is yard wide.
 All dogs that walk abroad in the hot months should be adorned with a muzzle,
  The optimistic live as a rule in town in which the home team is winning. temperature of s2 degrees is consid- cred a cool wave this summer.
  The iceman takes all spare money now, and there Is no help for it. Lorimer prefers to withhold his resig- nation until his term expires.
  Capt Hobson's Japanese war has either heer f1afc1afH Or GtOlan
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1911-07-07

DON'T HALT ON THIRD BASE
FOX CONGRATULATIONS, If you
would make home run. Order Coal
and have it delivered this month. The
kind of Coal you use has much to do
with successful HOme-running. Run
tie home fire on Smith e. Reifsnider
Elnn