The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-23
BoWsER HITS IT.
And the Fire That Followed Didn't
Amount to Much.

1t was O'Clock the other evening
| when Il boy left a heavy sack of some
thing at the basement door of the
Bowser mansion and Mr.. Bowser lost
no time in conveying specimens of it up
to the sitting room for Mrs Bowser's
inspection. They looked like chunks
of asphalt dug up from an old pave
ment, and she turned from them with
the remark:
7 suppose somebody has been after
you again with patent of some sort
or other"
Have you the slightest idea what
that something or other is - asked Mr..
Bowser with a complacent smile.
Perhaps it's cement to fix the holes
in the cellar?''
My dear woman, I am not in the
cement business this evening. 1t is not
! cement, nor is it compressed food for
the cat. 1t is not a microbe-killer nor
a moth destroyer. VIII you kindly lis
ten to me for a moment while I give
you some facts and figures.
go on"
ITO heat this house and do the cook
ing we consume 20 tons of coal per
year. The coal man may cheat US out
of at least four tons. The coal must
be dug from the bowels of the earth,
raised to the surface, loaded on the
cars, transported, unloaded again,
loaded into carts and delivered, and
even then must be handled again, to
say nothing OF the aSDeS- 0an you
see why it costs so much o.
'tOf course
eve are only one of 100000 fam
lies using COAL and there are all the
shops and factories besides. Suppose
we had a substitute for coal. Some
thing which needed scarcely any hand
ling, gave out five times the heat and
left no ashes behind? What would
that substitute be worth to America
to the world at large? No dust no
ashes. no giving LOO pounds for ton,
no clinl1ers and no waste ~
"sI thought you'd been taken in
again. replied Mrs Bowser, with
sigh
"Oh, you did ? Very kind of you,
indeed! Well. my friend, I'm going to
disappoint you this time. I'm going to
revolutiOnize the fuel of the world I'm
going to knock out coal until it wont
be worth so cents q ton. Right here
before your eyes is something which is
going to bring me in millions of dol
lars in the next few years and make
the name of Bowser a household word
all over the civilized world Millions,
Mrs. Bowser. millions!"
And he thrust his thumbs into the
armholes of his vest and walked up
and down before her. and the cat came
out from under the piano and walked
after him.
WELL she said, to break the long
silence.
well" he replied, Il will simply say
to YOU this evening that [ will heat our
house from now on for 10 cents per
week, and 1 will run steamboat from
New York to London for $25. am
now going down to the kitchen to ex-
ing is believing, and 1 may call you in
about half an hour 1 think III be
able to prove to you that haven't
been wasting my money on a spring
j
how got the idea that / don't know
enough to buy turnips at 80 cents
bushel, but I rather think I'll astonish
YOU
Mrs. Bowser realized that the ex-
pertinent would be carried to some sort
of a finish no matter what she said. !
and she therefore held her peace, and
Mr.. Bowser gathered up his specimens |
and descended to the basement
"And now is it another foolin' |
around with the hot water pipes or the
gas meter ~ asked the cook, who knew |
something of his experimental nature. |
my dear woman, I am going to as /
tonish you as well as benefit YOU" re- !
piled Mr.. Bowser, as he approached |
the range
and ] want no more of it, Is it the
coaI-gas you are going to try and bot 4,
tie up and make cure for the whoop- |
in cough %
BE calm and fear not. You see this
stuff? 1t is a new fuel to take the
place Of coal. 1t gives out five times
the heat and leaves no ashes. No more
Juggling up coal. no more ashes to
bother with. II will be a snap to work
in this kitchen after this. Just rake
out what little fire there is, viii you,
so that l can start afresh ??
ssThere'n be a Robbery of some sort.
---------------