davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
EAslN TIL E.SPUR>.
EXlFo T He oWZ9NEENT
SaS3 By ROY x. MOULToN.

mas presents on the way home last
year. and 1t all spilled down into his
bootleg.
Grandpa Bibbins says IL all the
Christmas neckties he has ever re-
ceived in his life were tied together.
end to end. they would reach around
the earth three times and leave room
for bow knot They probably all
gave him neckties because he has q
long flowing beard and nevcs wears
cm.
Am Tllson says the time 10 run for
office Is right after Christmas. when !,
teller has got plenty of cigars that he
don't know what else to do with.
Uncle Ez Harkins says the only time
he was ever kissed was once at a
sleigh ride party. when he was all bun
died up and she thought he was some
body else.
What has become of the old Teller
that always used to grease his chest
with arnicky before no went TO bed?
He IS probably keepin' company some
where with the other old Teller that
used to stay at home when the weather
bureau predicted storm.
The Teller that dyes his moustache
and leaves his hair gray doesn't fool
anybody but himself.
Grandma Perkins carries her false
teeth around in her pocket. and she
found the other day that they had
chawcd up most OF her plug tobacker
through force of habit.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
MIS-. Iobn n. p.r.nn

Goldsboro, y. c.. December Airs.
John B. Person. widow of Dr. ]. b.
Person, died yesterday at her home
In Fremont. She Is survived by sew
eral children and a wide circle Of near
relatives.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Tate s. Sterrett. of Highland county,
has been tho recent guest OF friends
in this city.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Mr.. and Mrc Taylor E. Carney, OF
Churchland. are guests OF Mr.. and
Mrs. B. West Tabb.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
Smith-LumIcy,

Goldsboro. n. c.. December AT
the home OF the brides parents this
afternoon. Surry I. Smith, of Newborn.
and Miss Sadie s. Lumley were mar
ried The coupl left on the evening
train for Mullins. s G.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Miss Annie Louise Schultz has re-
turned from Boston, where she has
been visiting Mr.. and Mrs. II. b.
Schultz.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

i. P. DeSaussure, who has been
quito Ill at AIS homo for the past weeA
is now improving.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
Thanks A,rfulIr.

Some kind but
misguided friend
who has evidently
been harooring a
deep seated grudSe
against US. has sent
by express. anony-
mously. a live pos
sum, and we have
got him chained in
our cellar. Those
who are not ac-
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Miss M. Alletta Crump. of New
York City, Is the guest of her aunt,
Miss L. c. Hulst. on West Grace
Street
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Miss Mildred Lefew was among tn
girls attending the dance at Wood
berry Forest School Saturday night
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
Rnu. VIII EN-.

Furnace fires that pass in the night.
Oxford shoes in November.
False teeth that slip out during the
soup course.
Inside seats at the theatre.
Gauze pajamas in the winter
Cures for falling hair.
Mandolin orchestras.
aluminium chimes
short handed snow .shovels.
Canadian money.
Pompadours
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05
wen Never he Happy Until We

heroines in real life.
Own two distinct pairs of suspend
ers.
Cultivate lasting friendship with
some gentleman Cor LADY, who owns
an automobile.
Participate in one good Michigan
watermelon.
Ascertain how men do 1t on 111 per
week
Own a green stucco house with a
pergola and Il porte-cochere.
Smash that phonograph next door
with a paving brick
Hear some political speaker who
doesn't mention the grand old flag"
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Miss Elizabeth Lennon left Mon
day for her home In Baltimore aftc
visiting Miss Camill. Wexford.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

where he is connected with the Ten
nessee Chemical Company"
Engagement Announced.
Mr.. and Mrs. Willie Farls, of Pleas
ant Grove, announce the marriage of
their daughter. Florence Faris. to
Everett s. Smith. OF Callaville.
Greenesville county. The marriage
will take place at Pleasant Grove
Methodist Church on Wednesday. De-
ccmber 90.
Howard-Denn.
The marriage of Mrs. Ola Neal Dean
of this city, and Benjamin Franklin
Howard, was celebrated yesterday at
the Union Station Methodist Church
parsonage, DR.. W. II. Edwards oflci-
ating. The bride wore handsome
blue suit. with hat and gloves to match.
Mr.. and Mrs. Howard left at once for
Northern wedding trip that includes
Washington, Niagara, New York and
Toronto. After December IS they Will
be at home at 5000 East Broad Street
Meetings To-Day.
Lee Chapter. United Daughters of
the Confedcracy, will hold their regu-
lar monthly meeting this morning at
IL o'clock in Lee Camp Hall. All mem
bers are asked to be present
The central committee G the Asso-
citation for the Preservation OF Vir-
Ginia Antiquities will also meet this
morning at IL o'clock. The meeting
will be held in the rooms of the Vir-
ginla Historical Society.
The regular meeting of the Council
OF Jewish Women will be held at 3:45
p NJ. to-day in the Sabbath school
room of Temple Beth Ahabah In ad-
dition to the general business there
will be play entitled Trouble at
Satterlees." given by the members of
the Junior Council; also a vocal solo
by Mrs. Henry Hymes. accompanied by
Mrs, Sig. Hutzler. Members and their
friends are cordially invited to attend
Lecture Mt Art Club.
Admiral Harrie Webster will lecture
this afternoon at 4:30 o'clock in the
rooms of the Art Club of Richmond
Tea will be poured at the conclusion
OF the lecture q usual.
In and Ont of Town.
Miss Mary Foster has returned to
ST. Anne's School after spending sew
eral days with relatives here.
Miss Marie Ridley. of Atlanta. is
visiting Miss Katherine Hasan at her
home on East Franklin Street
Miss Elizabeth Lennon left Mon
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

Miss Marie Ridley. of Atlanta. i
visiting Miss Katherine Aagan at he
homo on East Franklin Street.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-12-05

She visited here last winter and was
entertained great deal during her
stay In thi5 CITY
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

shows always come when You have
 got no roll?
 Why does the youngster always squal
 when he's on exhibition? Why does tse tomcat always yowl just when you want to sleep? Why do the big feeds always come
 when you're not in eonditionE Why must you always give away the things you'd rather keep? Why does the servant always quit
 when guests you have invited Why does t-e phone bell always ring just after you've retired. Why does your dentist alawys look as though he was dtlighted? Why do you say that you've re
 signed when you know you are
 -red? Wby do your friends when you re a-Ve, slam you as good iriehds
 shouldntg
 Why do they always some1ow save their praises till you die. How is it something always comes tc this world as they shouidntE The only answer Echo gives, and Echc answers Why?
 THE SAME OLD sIxPENcE The same old smile, the stme old
 dress suit,
 The same old patent leat CT boot The same old fashioned mirror and The same old speech that gets the
 hand.
 The same old beau Of easy grace The same old figure, same old face, The same old collar, same old lie, Fhe same old way Of getting by, The same old line of paTlor talk. The same old gestures, same old wall The same old jolly, same old wit The same-oid actor, same old hit; The same old idol, same old way, The same old girls al matinee. The same old hero, same old sy tle; The. same old bouquets all the "l7ie The same old curtain calls and more The sgme old hand claps as Of ycIc- The same cid optimistic air, The same old habits dehOnaire; They same old friends who always go. The same old sign with $, R. o. The same old prince we always kny' The same old hearty friend, JohI
 Drew.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
WHAT LINCOLN SAID ABOUT THE COURTS.

It is the fashion of soclalistic and '1rogressiye" newspapers and speak CTS to quote Lincoln. in whose name demagogues for more than genera ton have committed crimes, regard ing the fallibility of the courts.
 On one occasion. Mir Lllcoln de. clared that the highest court Of the land had seriously erred. It has never been contended, we believe, that courts are sacred and infallible but that they are institutions. in the choice of the administrators of which, so great care is taken that the like. lihood of error is reduced to a min. imum-
 But it was never suggested by Lin oolu, nor by Jefferson who once com plaincd that the judiciary was beeom. ing an encroaching body, tbat the ju- dieial recall was the remedy for the evils which attached to courts, as they must attach to all human insti- tutons.
 It may be urged that such rem edy never occurred to Jefferson and Lincoln; that .f it had occurred to them they would have grasped it eagerly: that decades were to pass before the idea of the recall Of the judiciary and the curtailmeut Of the powers Of the United States supreme court should find birth in the gigan. tie intellect Of that matchless and distinguished publicist. that inspired statesman. Jonathan Bourne, jr- whose mentor is an obscure lawyer and socialist dreamer. ". s. URen.
 However just the structures of Lin coln may have been they were no' made by him as president but wheT he was a rising lawyer, in the hea of a fierce political campaign
 Never in a public utterance in hi. msturer years when calmness an' patience had taken the place Of youth ful fire. would Lincoln have said ; word that might have been construed to be directed against the iudicia system whose integrity and useiulueo' depends upon popular confidence.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
THIS IS THE
 CAMPAIGN SEASON.

Our Tucson Friends are unueces- sarily worried over remark made by Maricopa county candidate at Tempe lately in which he promised, If elected to the legislature. to es- tablish a university there, school oT mines or some such institution which should rival the L. Of A. That's nothing. Tucson must remember that tLesc are campaign times and it must know that promises of any, thing ga a great ways in the salt River valley when the silly season is on. Anyway, inc candidates know this and they are governing them selves accordingly Candidates fof tbe office of dog catcher have been promising to abolish the court Of com. neree and Co trim the nails of the United States supreme court, if later they do not conclude to abolish it d. together. In the stress of circum- stances they are likely to promise anything from a seaport to a sar- cophagus.
 It would not surprise us if a can4i- date were to pledge himself to the establishment of a theological semiu ary at Kyrene or if another should declare 1t to be his first and last duty 10 set up an institution for scientific research at stringlown.
 sNe you'd reassure inc disturbed citizena of Tucson. t viii be many a long day before there is a second
 university in Arizona and an equally bong one before school of mines sbali nestle in the shadow of tho Tempe Butte.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
E9gyN.THE.SPUR E8SdF>. THE .NoME<NT SpN By ROY K. MOULTON.

i was inside the Sat He has dis covered about sl39 in silver that had got lodged inside the sweat band of the hat while the collection was be- ing took in it. By gosh, if it had been paper money. maybe he would
 leyer have noticed it The Rev. has
 got a higher opinion of his congre-
 atiou, also of Deacon Tibbitts. who lakes up the collections, since he made ais discovery.
 There is SO many dry fellers that
 going to vote wet and so many wet
 oilers that is going to vote dry, that it is quite difficult to figger out ma
 ority either way in the coming cleo; ton in our midst
 About the only difference between a s4 genuine briaT pipe and 25 cent
 imitation, Is that you get more eou- nons with the former and it don't take SC long to save up for that solid silver pickle boat.
 When it comes to goin up in air ships which can't carry heavy loads
 nost fellers would rather be Wright
 han be president just now.
 There are a good many things that need explaining and one of tls5m is why they always send the rurtiest siris around to sell church tickets for suppers and 10 solicit subscriptions for benefit concerts.
 It is said to be impossible to get
 thin' for nuthin', but Hank Purdy u it. He wandered into a pest house nd got tce small pox once. and 1t didn't cost him cent. either to get in.
 1t is gettin' so that very few feIlors besides southern statesmen and tcle- graph operators chaY tobacco any more.
 4 lot Of fellers that kick like blazes when their wives ask them for a new pair of shoe strings, will drop a uickle into a horseless Iianner With out slightest procrastination.
 We never yet see a feller that wore earmufs who didn't take pes smistic view of life, or artick over shoes either. for that matter.
 ACCORDING TO UNCLE A5NER 1t only takes one hoss to win a race. but it takes two to win in a dice game.
 To beats au how eyeglasses will relieve the monotony of long nose. I would rather ride in a payas-you enter car street car then in a pray as-you-enter oatmobile. A fellar is putty apt to git back about what he gives out in this world Hank Purdy gave HOd Renfrew gen uine imitation solid silver pickle dish for a birthday present and got it back on his silver anniversary. It's mighty hard for a fat man to make anybody believe he is sick and so as long as there ain't any use in feelin bad he generally manages to keep putty we'll
 Licker and gossipin' Eimmen cause about nine-tenJhs of the unhappiness in this world; also ia the next Lafe Tubbs buried bis fust wife and put up a tumbstgu which read: We shall meet above" Hayin been married six times since Lafe will have lot Of explsinin' to do when he ! gets there.
 We never see a picter Of a turin nobleman yet that didn't look as if | he wished he wasn't. Hank Todd has got three trained heifers and an educated goat. Reg lar stock company, as it were. Another model husband has gone wrong in New York, having eloped
 with his employer, young lady ar tisL
 r x MatiIer
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
FATAL QUAIL HUNT

TOPEKA, Nov. 21.-A. A. Hayes, general auditor Of the Atchison. To- peka and santa Fe railroad, died here today of blood poisoning as a result of small gunshOt wounds in the right leg. received while hunting quail
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
FROM THE HIcKEYVILLE CLARION

t is reported that there is d shop litter workin' in our midst. Luke BII- bins says she may 5e blamed strong woman, but heu bet 9 grindstun ana a peck of carrots again duzzen dun. nuts tcat she cant lift his black smith shop.
 Iii Higgins is gettin' ready fer 10 fake the census. Hi ought 10 be all right for that job, as he has always demonstrated his ability to take any thing in sight-eyen easter ile.
 Rev. Hanks plug hat hasn { nl iate- ly. and he thought his head was get lin ouTn shape as it felt like bumps
 Copyright 1911,
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

Chah,beTiain,s Siomach aud Liger Tablets do not sbsEeu or gripe and nay be taken with perfect safety by the most delicate woman or the youngest child. The old and feeble will also ind them a most suitable remedy for aiding and strengthenjng their wes Seued digestion and for reg uiating tho bowels. For sale by sa- dealers.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

WHY Why does the biii collector always happen in on Fri day?
 Why dCes the cold
 snap alw ay $ come when you are out of coal! Why does the pas tor always call when your house
 is untldy? Why fo the good
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
DIED NATURAL DEATH

The Only one of sfFzmiIy of Seven
 SAN FRANCISCO. Nov. 2i.-August Buisley, a famous early day balloon ist. is dead here, aged sixty-iour. He was one of a family of seven circus performers. and was the only one Co dle 2 natural death.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
A auRetAR,s- AWFUL bad.

may not pafaiyze a home so com pletely as q mothers long illness, But Dr. Kings New Life Pills are a splendid remedy for women. '"rhey gave me wonderful beHeBt' in consti- patton and female trouble" wrote Mrs. Nj. C. Dunlap of LeadilI. Tenn. lf sihng, try them. 25c a. .en dealers
 543 .
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
zOugy 4t5arTOdaz LE1lii 5 %y TfF5 lHe.s R0SERT M A4E0kkETzE.
WE. THE PEOPLE.

A NOTED italian composer, watching me sua , cone grand parade-but y ou should slng- .,,.U 7-r;ta so anthem give words. The women accepted the challenge. oheIeu ,;-, .(,,5 slvertised for a National Suffrage An them Poems by noted riters over the country were iudeed by a comm ittee who did not hho" inc authors They chose one by Mmnetta Iheo
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

ornment suit against the Steel Coz. ToraiiOa. The Review, as it's reader will recall expressed the belief that Mir. Roosevelt would especially resent the statement in Inc complaint that be had been mislcd by Judge Gary and Mr. Prick in consentlug to the absorption Of the Tennessee Coal & Iron company lie has lately most vigorously expressed his resentment and has thereby been led into ds fense Of inc steel trust as 9 part of our industrial system, for which, however, he recon meHds, rather in. definitely, certain changes. It was loo much to expect that Mr. Roose sell would remain quiescent under inc imputation that it was possible for the unerring c. err or for the lnf8lHble to fail.
 The Mothers Meeting" near sha- dy Bend, Kans., where that. tarry frame up" against Miss Chamberlain uas c7ncocted will go dovr in..3 his toiy as he most expensive ssseta- blaze for the size of it ever held. We s.iiose nor. us. the ot re- gather ings throughout the country which have been calling themselves Moth CTS Meetings" will apply 10 the leg isiature for a change of name.
 "who raised hell?" vas tho an bounced subject oE a lecture to be delivered al Tucson on Sunday night. is We understand lt the lecturer was not intending to deal with politics, seaports. libel suits and such things but merely 10 present his new and rersouai views regarding the biblical schema,
 g. The republican management ot tnss Sountry might keep it's ticket full through the medium of an alternative writ requiring unwilling candidates tc appear on December 13, or some con venient,. subsequent date and show cause why they should he allowed e
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

refrain is.
 We the people, All ople
 How And is not that stirring daughters sisters no less the roople.'
 any telguee aud wisdom cf the womef
  deeng suffrage But for number Of generations
  industries and occupations directly affected by es municipal and notnsl laws They are th mother the practical and the only gain the advantage o voting Is O but O ratroism-oge wealth to the people How i t E q
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

No, no, ! tsil you ho" Deds arcsS but her eyes were mo,sa with the momery of her pet. Please
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
create vacancies

creaJe Vacancies.
 The colonel 1oiRs the popular ont. cTy against the manner of dissolution of the American Tobacco and the Standard Oil companies. Yet he aP proved the solution of the problem Of the Northern Securities company.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

1T there Is any dtseord ameRg ihe democrats of Arizona, it is funny that nobody but the republicans ever heard of it.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

General Reyes is having difficulty in finding a place to give his revolu' ton good start
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22
DEMOCRATIC STATE AND CON.
 GREsSloNAL TICKET

For U. s. Senators Mark A. Smith. Tucson. Henry F. Ashurst, Prescott For Judge of Supreme Court Alfred Franklin, Phoenix. Henry D. Ross, Prescott D. L. Cunningham, Tomhstonc. For Representative in Congress Carl Hayden, Phoenix.
 For Governor George ". P. Hunt Globe.
 For Secretary of ststs Sidney P. Osborn, Phoenix.
 For Auditor J. C. Callaghan, Bisbee.
 For Treasurer David Johnson, Douglas.
 For Attorney General George Purdy Bulard, PhoeHix. For Superintendent of Public h.
 struetion c. 0. Case. Jerome.
 For Corporation comm!ssien F. A. Jones, Phoenix. ". P. Geary, Winslow. A N. Cole, Douglas DEMOCRATIC COUNTY TICKET 
 For State Senator c Nj Roberts W. ?. Simg.
 For State Representative Samuel B Bradner J. Ii. Ball. George D. Craig A c. Curry. James F. Duncan. W. j. Graham Carleton B. Kelton.
 For Judge Of Superior cour, Fred A Sutter. |. For Clerk of Superior Court J. E. James.
 For Sheriff Harry C. Wheeler.
 For Recorder Owen E Murphy.
 For Treasurer Frank Ramsay.
 For School Superintendent H H. Hotchkiss.
 For County Attorney V G. Gilmore.
 For Assessor F. A. Hughes. For County Road Superintendent J. J. Benton.
 For Surveyor J. $. McNeish.
 For Supervisors August Hickey William Riggs. John Rock. Warren District Precinct Ticket.
 For Justice of Peace. John ". Hogan, Bisbee. Samuel L. Iuge, Bisbec. George R. Smith, Lowell
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

(copSriEht. isi6 by the MaeMiiian co-zpanT
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

Al the time of the fling of rhe gov
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

Warren District Precinct Ticket.
 For Justice of Peace. John ". Hogan, Bisbee. Samuel L Inge, BisbeC. George R. Smith, Lowell.
 Fer Constable. James L. Cannon, Bisbee. John J. McCreas Bisbee. L. R. Bailey, Lowell.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

To be eontlnuedj.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-11-22

For Corporation comm!ssicn F. A. Jones, Phoenix. ". P. Geary, Winslov. A N. Cole. Douglas
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-02-19
A. and M. College.


Saltwater, Okla, Feb. 1S.-The
better seed and livestock train fin
ished its tour of the eastern par
| of Oklahoma, last Friday. Some OF
the lecturers who are members of
! the A. and NJ. College faculty, have
| returned and report a very successful
trip, much more successful, in fact,
than any one had dared hoped for.
The weather was fair the greater
shows that the farmers appreciated
the efforts of those who had the
train in charge 10000 people attend.
ed the twenty-one days tour
Professor w. A. Linhlater, of the
animal husbandry department, has
announced that the following stu
dents in the school of agriculture
and domestic economy are eligible
to graduation two year course: b.
V. Aldrich, Eugene Sayre, John
Hauser, Ed Spaulding. First year
course-G. w. Davis, l.. C. Rusk, f.
A Ramsey, L. ]. Winchill; also
E. r. Copley, Frank Ikard, ]. D.
Weber, E. r. knight, Frank Horn,
providing they make up back grades
and offer satisfactory substitution
for omitted courses.
Last week the business class
and the sophomore class each held
a class party Large attendance and
much enjoyment was reported from
both parties.
F. w. Perisho, the Y. NJ. C. A.
general secretary, left last Thurs
day for his home in Iowa. on ac-
count of the illness of his brither.
Professor N. c. Booth, of the
horticulture department, missed his
classes a few days last week on
account of illness.
The program committee of the
alumni association held meeting
o arrange for the annual banquet
which will be held on the evening
of commencement day next June.
The date for the production or
'lmogene." the junior and senior
class play, has been announced to
be February %. This play promises
to be the best ever produced by
the students.
Nd c. w. Medicines, state dairy
Inspector. was at the college las.
week.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1911-02-19
Meat EATING and Rheuma atism

Unity Editors Note-The followine
is an extract from a letter sent tc
Unity by a lady who has been trou
bled with rheumatism and was not
clear in her application OF the Truth
The reader will see that she gained
one point, which was that from the
medical view, as set forth by the Unit.
ed States government, beef does not
give iron to blood.
"l was in such straits that | gave
up and went to a doctor. 1t was too
funny-that interview. He looked at
me with an inquiring eye, and | pro-
ceeded to inform him that had come
to him to see if he could tell me any