The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1911-01-18
A Midsummer
Day s Dream

double-width smile, the Typewriter
Lady burst into the office.
20, girls, hello-1 mean-good-
morning 3 I'm - talking-about! Let
me get my things off. There, that's
better. Now, guess what I've done!"
And the Typewriter Lady beamed
about her.
Got married"
Got a raise"
Got bargain hat"
mo, you silly children. Something
much better I've been offered a house
in the country for the summer" And
the T. L seated herself triumphantly
and played a barcarolle on her ma.
chine, with variations.
"Theres' "a lady at our boarding
house who owns this lovely old place
in the country. The people she rents
it to are going abroad for the sum-
mer and my sister and l are to have
it free for the whole season. just for
taking care of it.
Were just waiting for salary day.
so We can buy the few things Well
need for it. You see it isn't quite
completely furnished-that is, Well
need a few porch chairs and some
extra table linen, and some bath fix
lures. The bath fixtures are my idea.
I always did have a perfect craze for
bath fixtures.
You can all come and spend week
ends. Why, l can hardly wait for the
first of the month to buy my COM
mutation ticket. And, say. l under
stand there's summer school out
there for young men! Aha, 1 thought
thatd bring out a few sparkles in
dicating interest. think it's sort OF
preparatory school where they get
them ready for college-and you know
boys that are being prepared for col
lege usually have fathers who aren't
exactly what you'd call poor. Oh, I
have a perfectly glorious summer
planned"
Il say, Hortense," chimed in the One
Practical Girl, ''have you been out to
see the place."
Not yet. We're going Saturday
afternoon, so as to be there when they
deliver the porch chairs and the linen
and the bathroom accessories"
The One Practical Girl smiled in
scrutably. "Once upon a time" said
she. Il bought suit through seeing
it illustrated in the back of maya
zine. 1t was perfectly grand suit-in
the picture. My wash-lady is wearing
it. Every time I see it on her have
pangs of conscience to think how
made a fellow creature a victim to
| something I wouldn't tolerate myself
She has never reproached me in
words. She just persistently wears
the suit-the moral of this tale being
| that you never can tell until you see
things" And the One Practical Girl
went on sharpening her lead pencil.
On Monday morning the Typewriter
Lady's desk remained closed. The
girls had been breathlessly awaiting
| her account of the country paradise.
of how the porch looked garnished
with it's new chairs, of the splendor
of the nickel soap dish. the towel
racks, the dollar-twenty-nine-
-one-fifty-shower bath, and all the
rest that was to bring summer refresh.
ment to the city-worn Office ladies.
At noon came Hortense, wearing the
blank expression Of a magician whose
trick has gone awry-who has failed
to make the rabbits come out of the
hat-and who breads the jeers of the
audience. One could see with half an
eye that the tears were being held
back with mighty effort. The One
Practical Girl slipped her arm swiftly
around her shoulder
Don't you care, Hortense, bet
know just exactly what's happened.
Didn't l buy that suit out of the
magazine? But, say, don't you care
You can make up what you're out OF
pocket by having ten-cent lunches,
same as l did for couple of months
and you'll feel all the better for it,
II
1T isn't the money" walled the
downcast one, half so much as it is
the meanness of that woman mis-.
representing things to me like that l
remember her distinctly mentioning
the tub The tub! 1t makes me rage
when l think of it! Imagine the pic.
ture Of my nickel plated soap rack at
tached to the side of disintegratins
wooden washtub, and my perfectly
grand patent nozzle shower bath
hooked on to the branch of a tres
somewhere, rugged up over the
tub"
"Hortense!!"
In tent, in tent, of course!
There wasn't any bathroom! And the
porch chairs! Oh, girls, it makes me
weep to think of my beautiful porch
chairs sitting out in the middle OF
the dusty road, being run over every
minute by automobiles. They'd have
to sit there, you see, for there wasn't
any porch! And the front door opened
right on to the road And as for table
iineni What would be the use of
table linen if you had to eat canned
food all the time? You could just
make picnic of it and have it out
in the woods, or anywhere, for all
! I, II