davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23
SUNDAY MAGAZINE FOR JULY %. 1911

and seemed be pretty indignant generally got
up petition.
1t O'Clock in the morning. l telephoned
to my weeping family to cheer up as l would yet
Patsy, and again called the Mayor After awakening
the head of the city government from his slumbers
threatening, caoljng, and entreating, | secured
autographed letter from the Mayor the poundmaser
which read:
DEAR BnL-As personal favor me- let this have
his dog and II give you the dollar.
GEORGE G.. RAYMOND Mayor
drove in triumph to the pound. The poundmaster
off at cock fight with his friend, the officer of the
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty Animals This
is fact; for the cockfgh raided that night, and
they all arrested After fr1itess search through
the pound for Patsy the poundmaster wife said me-
Il do hope you'll get your dog and that I'll
him again! He busts into everything and eats all the
provisions we have. guess he's with my husband. He
appears very fond of him; you'll have to back
in the morning.
But didn't have to come back in the morning. AS
drove past the police station it was toward dawn.
heard great noise and confusion for peaceful
village. Stopping to inquire the cause, found it
the aftermath of the raid the cockght. Patsy had
been the first offender grabbed, and he in charge of
the police, together with the officer of the S. P c. A.
Patsy finally permitted to depart with upon my
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23

he ever going make it that evening His medicine
didn't seem to help much; he took another swig at
it. How he got his clothes on his can't exactly
explain 1t job for undertaken, valet. But
after regular ghtmare of it Carnarvon started for
the Schuelt fat He didn't dare take cab this time,
for fear he'd be found asleep and they'd think he
drunk. So he walked. 1t must have been terrible.
Most of the time he staggered along with his eyes Shut
hoping he'd into somebody who d punch him in the
head or give him good kick to wake him up No such
luck.
well he got to the Schufelt fat somehow and just
before going in he emped the bottle in hopes it would
carry him through the ceremony. That last dose made
him feel if he living inside blanket with his
and legs tied. Lord! that man was camel
HE just got in and that about all; for he
stumbled on the first rug fell feet down the floor and
begun to Mrs Schufet picked him up, and she
and Nanny ugged him into bedroom and tried wake
him up. BY this time he Just mutterng to himself
something like | don't give cuss for anything. I'm
tired of swimming through jey-blub- blub-b lub-
| want 10 lay down and die decent.
"Of course they thought he was drunk What else
they to think? But SO long she safely spiced
to him Nanny didn't care-she determined not to
make miss of it, and she Mrs Michael
Carnarvon she knew she'd give him tongue lashing
that would sober him up So they slapped wet towels
his face, stepped his toes ticked the soles of his
feet used few needles brushed up his hair backwards
and dragged him to greet the friends of the family
Wow He tried to crawl on his hands and knees but
they wouldn't have it. Everybody thought it
disgrace but he was rich and that always explains
lot. ...
when he introduced to the minister, he melted
down into chair shut his eyes, and opened his mouth
Nanny pinched him good. He got up in kind of a
trance fell into Mother Schufelt sisters lap stepped
into the rubber plant upset table full of wedding
presents and then the old lady decided to hurry things
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23
| 0

for his safety and iportuned to him dire
destruction overlook the playful Patsy.
While the matter being legally delayed, de-
termined to what political influence could do in
the matter of securing the Grant Patsy from the
pound.
The present poundmaster had gone in under reform
administration. l too for reform. l happened to
be personal friend of the Mayor, the Controller the
Police and Fire Commissioners And so l secured a
hack and drove around.
saw the Mayor first and, he said it matter
affecting the Citys finances he directed to the Con-
troler. The Controller dubious He thought,
where immediate action necessary in this case,
that the executive branches of the city government
responsible As a friend, and unofficialy, he
advised go the local officer of the S. p c. A.
found the officer of the S. P c. A. after much diff
Guilty He listened to my tale of woe, and informed me
that he would be powerless in the matter until the dog
killed "If they shoot him" said he, "as you say
they threaten, have the matter investigated, the
law says dogs must be suffocated by gas know that
fellow amt been suffocatng them by gas, because he
amt got any gas over there at the pound. They
kerosene lamps
then went to the Chief of Police, the Fire Com
missioner and the City Clerk They offered to sign
petition would get up. asked what good that
would do and they said they didn't know, but when
people in New Rochelle got indignant about anything
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23

faithfully promising to produce him in court in his
presence necessary.
l rode home dawn with Patsy in the hack. AS we
neared house gray gaunt darted across Pelham
Road Like flash Patsy went through the window of
the hack. taking glass and sash.
OF course he returned to the pound. And there he
stayed until | sent word that didn't want him in any
circumstances and that if they would suffocate him
cording to law l would pay for the gas-and gas is
dollar and twenty-five cents thousand feet in New
Rochelle! The hackmans charge ten dollars for all
night service and five dollars for repairs the window
of the hack.
I .ATER: l much interested in endeavoring to
- position for myself on the School Board Of
New Rochelle but when brought all possible pressure
to BEAR the Mayor, Controller, City Clerk Tax Col
lector and Fire and Police Commissioners frank
enough to say:
Look here! Don't you think this administration has
done enough for you' Didn't we get your dog out of
the pound? What do you want, the earth2"
Now that we have firmly and rrevocably renowned
Patsy and all his works. have given him away, fully,
completely, and in fee simple; and he knows it, he
never leaves us.
Maggie Cline says it me right. / wrote
the for Kelly" promised her. But submit that
have never promised her anything but to send Patsy
back
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23
BY GELETT BURGESS

and get the agony How she induced the minister
to do the Job don't know. Perhaps it the hundred
dollar bill Carnarvon had in his vest pocket did the
trick Anyway, they propped him up on each side and
one behind, and the parson done his act. Everybody
present afterwards that they heard him say L
will
out sofa and covered him up with tablecloth.
While Nanny changed her clothes the guests went into
the dining room to feed and drink his health.
Nov, whether it champagne young Carnarvon
had paid for just the natural tendency of we'd
ding guests to play the goat l dun no. anyway they
fixed up Joke on the happy pair. There cutup
there rising young plumber he named Square,
and first thing | knew he round to my stand
and wanted to hire my hack 1t was him that put me
the whole thing He was fairly busting with it.
He offered twenty dollars for the of my cab and
my hat and overcoat, and surrendered. Naturally,
followed round the to the fun He sent away
the aXicab Carnavon had waiting and went up stairs
to see if all ready.
"The rest of them had everything fixed. They got
young Carnarvon down stairs holding him up the way
you do drunk, and they rammed him into the cab.
Then they brought down Nanny who was beginning to
talk You ought to have heard her remarks-they
was something desperate. The guests only screamed
and laughed at her. OSquare got on the box-we all
tied up the trunk with ribbons and off they went,
Nannys language dripping out of the cab like leaky
watering cart.
"OSquare brought back my cab towards one o'clock
next morning He didn't say nothing; but heard after
wards that he dumped EN- OUT anarvon dead asleep,
Nanny fighting mad, and the trunk covered with old
boots and white nbbOnS-On little cross road IN the
middle of Van Cortlandt Park. That his idea of
Joke What happened after that don't know, except
that week later Michael Carnarvon brought suit
for the annulment of his marriage the grounds that
he asleep during the CEREMONY
The cross eyed cabman paused and felt in his inside
pocket. "If you don't believe it, he remarked "look at
this here thing found it tucked into nook in the
cushion of my cab when | cleaned her out next
day" He held up locket, heart shaped with star
of white stones. 1t flashed like handful of sparks in
that smoky, dusty
Il amt sure it was Carnarvon's wedding present to
his wife" he explained. at wasn't advertised
for, and so never said nothing about it. You know us
cab drivers has got to have some perquisites.'
THE suspicious that had arisen in Fentons mind at
first sight of the eyed cab driver were con-
frlned long before the story finished. AS it ad
vanced, Fenton amazed at the mans audacity in
weaving point after point the facts of the octoroons
narrative.
The sleepy bridegroom could of course be other
than the dead fare Gordon Brewster the picture the
cabby had seen he watched from nearby
almost the identical the octoroon had described
the tragic truth disguised in this comedy recital As
chorus after chorus of outlaws appauded the tale Fen
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23

something savage she got him going till he popped
the question She certainly managed it great!
"Carnarvon's folks wild when they heard about
the engagement but by this time he deaf and blind
to the fact that the Schufelt girl only after his
money, and had the reputation around Chelsea village
got mad. Lord. must have been strain for that girl
to hold her tongue SOmetmeS but she boiled
till after the wedding You'd have thought she
half wltted, almost she tame when CarnarVon
around But how her mother used to catch
it when he left the fat And her mother could put up
pretty good jaw fight too.
well three days before the wedding Carnarvon had
to work like donkey engine to get his business
Strengthened up SO he could get off his honeymoon.
He at the office ght and day working himself to
FRAGILE In that time he hadn't slept more than three
four hours, all told and the morning of his marriage
he was about near all in can be, and keep
awake. In fact he couldn't keep awake, and that
the trouble They tell that last forenoon he was
practically walking and talking in his sleep Black
coffee didn't do good at ALL for he'd been living it
for week, practically He dictated his letters stagger
ing up and down the ROOM and every time he down
at the desk to sign his em the typewriter had
stick hatpns into him to wake him up. He took snuff
to make him he washed his face in cold water
every ten minutes, he kept the windows wide open,
everything he could think of brace him up; but he
just naturally got brewster and brewster every minute.
"They was things that simply had to be done, if he
going to git off next day and SO he kept till late
IN the afternoon, dOpy he couldn't talk American.
Blub blubl' was about all he could say. 1t some
thing awful His clerks mplored him to let them finish
up; but he didn't dare trust Them he stuck to the
ship. At six o'clock he like living corpse, half
blind with sleep yawnng continually and having to be
lifted up off the floor every five minutes. He living
on sheer nerve Blind staggers nothing to it. But
he left to go home, declining help from the boys and
Copyright by Burgess.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23

Of course, owing to ructions in his
family, not likely to get much assist
ance when he did get there.
WELL, on his way home he
w dropped in at drugstore
for dose of something, strychnine
or some such stuff, to brace him up
through the ceremony. After that
he didn't care, just as long as he
made good with the minister. How
he asked for the dope, | don't know.
He must have said something about
sleeping, | suppose; but, anyway,
the clerk thought he wanted a
sleeping draft, and he gave him
what turned out to be a twenty per
cent. solution of morphine. There
he was, hardly able to see straight,
with a double dose of dope on top
of it.
@He took a cab home, and the
driver had to pry him out of the
seat when they got there. He
crawled up stairs, wondering how
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-07-23
~. THE LIARS CLUB (Continued)
THE STORY OF THE
SLEEPY BRIDEGROOM

TT was funny story how young
Michael Carnarvon got married.
said the cab driver. Il never
heard of such a wedding in my life.
"You see, young Carnarvon was
really what you might call roped
in. The Schufelt girl was a manicure
working in the Hotel Persimmion,
and from the day she laid eyes on
him she began to wire things up to
marry him. s'pose all women do
that, one way or another; she done
it by listening instead of talking
When he begun to call on her-she
lived over on Charles-st with her
mother-she kept him talking about
himself till he thought she was the
cleverest girl in New York, which,
in some ways, she was. What with
playing the innocent-sympathetic,
keeping her mother out O the way,
and padlocking her temper, which
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

ishly. with his face turned away from
her. If 1t had a-been Ben. now. could
--er-done 1t; but the little 'un-I-I
-
"Mr. Dobbs. l respect you fer your
feelings fer / seen the thought ter
help were In your mind. but Ethel
Maud is a slimsy little thing as would
be hard for man to handle. She is
asleep. and I expect Mis- Dobbs have
got your dinner ready by now"
Il thank you. Miss seliny Lue.
ma'am. and do say as how you be the
master hand with the young 'uns. 1
was Jest a-telling Miss Cynthie. who is
awaiting to see you. that 1t do seem
a pity"
Miss Selma Lue's progress down the
street was resumed before Mr.. Dobbs
had exactly formulated the regrets he
wished to express. but whose nature
Miss Selma Lue inferred from expe-
rience.
But her hurried return to her own
affairs was not to be permitted by the
anxious neighbors along the path Of
duty which she had trod SO excitedly
with Bonnie Dobbs an hour before.
Mrs. Kinney had been sitting on the
hot stove or curiosity. and her face
was determined and her voice was
compelling as she hailed from her
stoop.
wait q minute. Miss Selling Lue.
can't you? Whatever was the matter
with the Dobbses?" she said, draping
herself over the picket-fence as II she
had come to hear the news II It took
all morning and all the backbone she
possessed to extract It
at was a bad accident, but It might
er been worse II she had a-run It in
her eye. though that woulder been
hard for her to do unless 1t had been
something like q knitting-needle. A
thumb amt SO much use except in
peeling potatoes and sich. as a sorter
balance wheel for the rest of the
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

ings you can't never understand. and
one Of 'em is a cussing husband"
That's SO. and l reckon can't
hardly sense your feelings in that
case. but II had a-married. and he had
a-felt cause fer cussing-There now.
she's done doze on with the sooth-
ing OF the hot water! Open my bag
there and git me that old linen hand
kerchief tored into strips. Don't take
on this rag tonight. and I'll fix 1t again
in the morning" Miss Selma Lue laid
the relaxed little figure on the bed
without causing a tremor of the white
eyelids.
Law. Miss Seliny Lue. It do seem
a shame you amt got ten of your own.
you are that kinder hovering-like with
them. l shore am sorry for you,"
said the grateful mother as she 1abbed
in the dart Of her sympathy with a
smile.
We'll. don't know but it's best as
1t is" answered Miss Selma Lue with
spirit. "fer you all are SO good about
letting me help with yours. People
kinder grow along towards what they
think about: and as think baby tend
ing a good part Of the day. come night
l feel like | was the mother of TWEEN
ty. Mind not to take on that rag until
l see 1t again"
In a few minutes Miss Selma Lue
departed and attempted to hasten
down the street, but was interrupted
at every turn. 1t seemed. On the cor
ner she met Mr.. Dobbs, whose steps
were faltering towards home.
Miss Seliny .Ile," ne said sheep
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

hand" answered Miss Selma Lue, COM
mencing in the dramatic part OF the
tale without any unnecessary pream-
BILE.
Now. amt that like Mary Ellen
Dobbs? ] never seen SIGH a person fer
keerlessness. It's a wonder she amt
did 1t before! 1t will be powerful awk.
ward to be without a thumb when Il
comes to going to meeting in a genteel
way with gloves"
TT was Ethel Maud. Mis- Kinney
Ethel Maud? Who ever heard of
child injuring her mother? Miss
Seliny Lue. she must have the rabies.
Maybe she was bit by a mad dog when
her mother didn't know It reckon
better call my children on this side
of the street till 1 see what happens"
Mis- Kinney. ma'am. please wait till
l tell you the straight Of It Ethel
Maud sewed her thumb in the sewing
machine. and she amt hurted bad at
all. In day or two
We'll. Miss Seliny Lue. I take It
hard indeed that you let me get SO up
sot over the troubles of one of my
neighbors that amt anything at all.
| never expected no such treatment
from you that calls"
oh. Mis- Kinney. honey" pleaded
Miss Selma Lue. with an eager pat on
the heaving shoulder. Il wouldn't hurt
your feelings fer worlds. Now. who
but you coulder been SO kind and
thought up all them Affections fer the
Dobbeses?"
That's Jest it." sobbed the friendly
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12
PUT YOUTH ON HIS GUARD
Evidently Recital Of Romanees Long
Passed Made No Appeal to His
Feelings.

Charles" said n sharp-voiced wom-
an to her husband In a railway car.
riage do you know that you and I
once had q romance In a railway car
riage?"
Never heard of It," replied Charles
in a subdued tone.
Il thought you hadn't; but don't you
remember. It was that pair OF slippers
I presented to you the Christmas DO
fore We were married that led to our
union? You remember how nicely
they fitted. don't you? Well, Charles.
one day when we were going to a pic
mic you had your feet upon q seat,
and when you were not looking took
your measure. But for that pair Of
slippers don't believe we'd have ever
been married"
A young unmarried man sitting By
Immediately took down his feet from
the seat--Ideas Magazine.
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

York Cottage. Sandringham Park,
which IL to be the kings shooting
lodge. is not very commodious house,
and It bears some likeness to the let.
ter E. In consequence 1t may be said
to be divided into three par: connect
ed by a cross piece.
The central part IL the Hottest. Dos
sessing three floors. while the other
parts have two only. The house could
be easily enlarged by producing the
arms. and II desirable adding a sec
ond cross piece. SO that the whole
block would be an oblong built round
two inner courtyards. and 1t is prob
able that the king will begin some
suct alteration next year. York Cot
tage as it now stands was put up by
King Edward as a bachelor annex. to
Sandringham and was added to in
1898. when the present king was
about to be married. II is Elizabethan
in style. with high gables and project
ing windows.-London World.
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12
ti2rNs P> TIeSHSSs GI;NI%,1I1IrE1sSsrrv

the doorway with a cracked, yellow
bowl Of hot water In one hand and the
towel In the other. You are Just like
all men folks. a-trying to make light
Of the sufferings Of women which they
can't none Of you know nothing about
Men always look at women troubles
outen the little end of the horn There
was Dobbs standing there accusing
me cause my stomick turns at the
sight Of blood. and him the one to un-
sew his own children II SO comes they
need It." Mrs. Dobbs was still white
about the mouth. and. the tears were
still undried on her red. round. shiny
cheeks. She stopped the water over
Miss Selma Lue's shoulder and soused
one Of Ethel Maud's little pigtail plaits
as she handed over the bowl with a
sninie.
There. there. Mis- Dobbs. you know
they amt a mite of harm in Mr..
Dobbs: and as fer cussin', looks like
that sinful habit is all the let-or man
have got. while q woman can break
up dishes. slam the stove lids. spank
the children. and make herself cup
Of tea to ease her nerves. and no
body even knows she's upset."
That's all very well for a woman
that's as free as you is. Miss Seliny
Lue: but married woman has feel
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

was introduced by particular re-
quest to Mrs. Wyndham Lewis. a pref.
ty little woman. a firt and a rattle;
indeed. gifted with a volubility I
should think unequaled and Of which
I can convey no idea. She told me she
liked silent. melancholy men," an
swered that I had no doubt Of IT.
Letter OF Benjamin Disraeli to his sis
ter
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12
Our Railroad Mileage.

We get our products to the con-
sumner by 100000 miles of railroad.
which is three times the railroad
mileage Of Great Britain. France md
Germany combined.
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

Il wonder" said the Sweet Young
Thing. why a man is always SO
frightened when he proposes?"
That" said the Chronic Bachelor.
rs his guardian angel trying to hold
him back-"-Stray Stories.
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12

Away with these cemeteries Of
stone; they are indecent; let me fade
into the anonymous grass.
The Lamar register., 1911-04-12
CHAPTER !.
Ethel Maud Sew. Her Thumb.

IF grown-ups would Jest chaw one
another's good luck. they could get
heap of satisfaction from it."
-Miss Selma Lue.
Miss Seliny Lue! Oh-Oh-o-
no. Miss Seliny Lue! Boo-hoo-hoo
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1911-03-25
Lincoln Liked Praise.

At the Republican club Lincoln din
ner in the Waldorf, William Barnes
Jr., showed a letter which, he said
Abraham Lincoln sent to his grand
father, Thurlow Weed. The letter ii
dated from the executive mansion
Washington, March 10. 1866, and is al
follows:
Every one likes a compliment
Thank you for yours on my little mott
tication speech and on the recent in
augural address. | expect the lattei
to wear as well as-perhaps better
Thanksgiving l have produced, bu
believe 1t Is not Immediately popu
lar.
Men are not fiattered by beint
shown that there has been a differ
ence between the Almighty and them
To deny it. however, in this case, is t.
deny that there is God governin,
the world. 1t is a truth which
thought others might afford for me L
tell It,"
Mr. Barnes said the letter had never
before been made public.-Ney Yorl
Times
The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1911-03-25
Supper Dishes.

/
The following are some dishes suit
able to serve for an evening supper
or they may be used for luncheon
dishes:
Savory oysters.-Clean a pint of
oysters, parboil and drain. Melt four
tablespoonful of butter, add the same
amount of flour and stir until well
Drowned. Pour on gradually the oys-
ter liquor and half cup of soup
stock. Add a few drops OF onion
Juice. Salt, pepper and teaspoonful
Of Worcestershire sauce and the oys.
ters. Serve on toast or In patty shells
Or timbale cases.
Russian Pattles.-Parboil, drain and
reserve the liquor from pint of
oysters, There should be half cup
Of liquor. Make sauce of three ia
blespoonfuls of butter, four and half
tablespoonfuls Of -four, one-half cup
Of chicken stock, half cup of cream
and the oyster liquor When the but
ter is bubbling hot, add the -four and
when well mixed add the other ingre.
dents; add two yolks we'll beaten. a
tablespoonful Of horse radish, two ta-
blespoonfuls of capers. salt and pep
per Add the oysters and as soon as
hot fill the patty shells
Stuffed Eggs.-Cut four hard-cooked
eggs in halves crosswise, remove the
yolks, mash and add two tablespoon
tuls Of grated cheese, one teaspoon of
vinegar, one-fourth of a teaspoon Of
mustard and salt and cayenne to taste.
Add enough melted butter to make
The mixture of the right consistency
10 shape. Make in balls the size of
the yolks and refill the whites. Ar
range on a serving dish, pour around
one cup of white sauce: cover and re-
heat
Eggs poached and served on toast
with tomato sauce are very good for
change.
Tint cream cheese with green and
I'LL the hollows of celery stalks.