The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-09-16
comes nearer being ac-

gently, ''now she comes nearer being ac- tually elhsh."
 The modern woman has gained in things, you will admit,'' said the woman presently. "She has advanced, She now has longer legs; she has ankles: she has a neck; she has superb shoulders; the beauty of her neck and arms are re- stored once more. after ages of long ob- scurity under heaped up materials"
 She Is certainly no longer mass without unity-a mere waist and skirt said the man. "She amuses us with a great variety of invention. She is covered with flaps. plackets. buttons, exits and entrances, addenda, and 1t is a little un- fortunate that these addenda chop her up into bits. And, speaking of being broken Up into bits, what's become of-er- err that tied up effect you women used to wear about the neither limbs-that hobble busness?'
 Did you like it?' asked the woman, in terestedly.
 well, 1t sort of gave to woman an air of mystery and importance. all tied up in ribbons, like box of bonbons,' said he facetiously
 That's a style of the past'' said the woman, Hike the old idea that used to limit woman to buying hat for the mere Justification that 1t splits her face Now you can buy any sort of an old hat and then fix your face to suit the hat'
 Sort of like buying frame and then securing the picture, eh?'' the man ques- toned.
 Precisely" the woman agreed. and then began to explain to him the particu- lar kinds of make up'' that harmonize with Killarney pink" "Flamingo red. Apple green" Chinese yellow" Cor beau red," and various other new colors.
 
 So you see. after all, hats are more than just hats said the woman as she finished her drink and informed the young man that she must go.
 Look for instance, at that little spind- ling sort of woman going by now pointing to the aforesaid person.. No matter how much flesh she might accumulate in the years to come. she'll always be little Look at her hat It firmly dominates her, and not only does 1t dominate her, but everybody who sees her"
 Its perfectly patent that her hats the captain of her soul" the man remarked presently. "If I were she I'd honestly be afraid of it'
 Haven't you had clothes that you were afraid of?" asked the girl. looking Up at him inquiringly. Hats that were like wet blanket to you? Hats that when you wore them walking or to church were far worse than the awful teacher who used to chaperon you in your college days? Hats and clothes that if you thought they would cling to you longer than just one season would make you jump into the river and end your life to get rid of them?"
 "Wait-stop!'' admonished the man. Let us stand here and look at the crowds go by. Aren't the girls of this sea- son delicious, funny looking, little things? Why if l had met one of them in a dark lane years ago. I would have run for dear life and told that something queer had dropped down out of an air ship and was in our midst-and not from one of the worlds airships, either, but one from Mars-or some other queer place."
 Don't you like the way the 1911 girl looks?b asked she, prettily.
 Look at that funny little one passing now" said the man, laughing fit to die That little tight black suit, and that grotesque little hat pulled down over her ears! It looks like a bee hive; and I've notion to call her Honey I shouldn't be surprised to see a bee rise from it at any moment"
 Maybe the girl of the season has a bee In her bonnet Who lxnows?" said the clever woman, and bowed her "adieux"
 Gadsden, where she was the guest of Miss Fannie Woodruff. Mrs. Sword also spent some time this summer at Mentone
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