davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
HE HAD HIS H
And lt Took a Long, Long
 Find Out by Whom.


 One of the most elaborate and sus- tained practical jokes on record was that played on J. NJ. Langford-eom- monly known as "Joe"-some fifty years age According to the version given in the Life of Sir William Rus. sell Langford was in the Garrick club in London when Albert Smith accosted him: Hello. Joe. Who has cut your hair?" Joe was in a digni fled mood and resented the query. "l really don't see" he replied. how it ean interest you who cut my hair. Smith went downstairs and stood in the hall. The next member who came np to the morning room sauntered up to LapgfurG with: "l see you've heen having your hair cut Who did it?" Joe very Steru'y replied. 'I can't i'm agine why you ask me- Then he or dered a gass of sherry and bitters The waiter drought 1t and gave little start of surprise as he presented if with q Beg pardon sir It's along of your air. sir; il looks unusual Joe went to the glass and saw nothing re
 
 his face Charles burst upon him with Where or earth did you get your hair cut. my dear JoeT'
 Joe could stand il no longer. He went off to his chambers in Ray moud's buildings. Gray's inn. Next day he saw an advertisement in the Times: "J. NJ. L.-Say. who cut it: Was i4 other? Confess ere 1t be too late. It was only the first of a series of sim liar announcements. and the ingenuity of his tormeutors devised continual surprises for him. On the day he went down To Chertsey races he saw yhe walls pacarded with enormous posters. yellow and black: "J. NJ L.- 0uce more, who cut it? You must speak" band of Ethiopian min streis vas furnished with a melody to sing outside Raymond's buildings to the air of What Are the Wild Waves Saying" then very popular. And the refrain WAS;
 What are de wild waves saying as dey lap
 de Waterloo statre
 What are dem wild waves saying? Dey
 say Who cut Joe's hair?
 In despair. Langford went abroad. and when. at Chamouix. he climbed to the Cascade des Pelerins he found plastered in front of him a huge vel low poster bearing the words: "J. NJ. L.-Confess, reveal. or be forever lost, Who cut it?'' Joe's spirit was broken. He sat down and wrote a humble letter to Albert Smith: Il yield. Spare me My hair was cut in St Martins court at the barber's on the left hand side His charge was threepence l am quite beaten"
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
Literary Notes.
AMERICAN MAGAZINE

The American Magazine tor October publishes the first installment of the autobiography of Senator La Toilette ot Wisconsin. It deals with the early life and first political struggles of one Of the greatest fighting liberals of this generation. It is crammed with ad- ventures and vivid with intimate Die lures ot great men.
 Fiction, in the October American, is headed by announcement of H. c. Wells new serial novel "Marriape T which begins in the November mum. Der. NIT. Wells stands at the head of contemporary novelists and students oi the age, and Marriage is a start ling analysis of matrimony by the one man who realizes it's relation 10 mod ern society.
 In this number is also a dramatic newspaper story by Donal Hamilton Haines; new and powerful tale of A girl who couldn't get work, by Edna Feroer; one Of James Oppenheim, ,s most vivid stories, and a fsscinating contribution 10 W. ]. Loeke's adven, lures of "Aristide Pujol.n kin Hubbard and Ed" Howe, perhans the best charaeteristieally Ameriesn humorist now living, also contribute Id the number.
 Hugh Il. Fullerton, the great base ball expert, contributes, "The Right and Wrong of Baseball" which, be.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
Bradley Theater
TIE WITCHING HOI-R


 The Witchlng Hour, referred to in Augustus Thomas masterpiece of that name, which is to be presented under the management of Geo. N. McGregor x Co. on Friday, sept. 22, at the Brad ley theatre, Is not midnight but two o'clock in the morning. However, though il is possible to specify the def, nite hour in the mind ot the play wright when he chose the title for his drama, the name really has a wider significance in its general suggestion Of all that Is mysterious and, to the un- initiated mind, almost superhuman. The exact hour is established by the fact that the clock on the stage strikes two al the end of the second act, thus carrying out the mysterious suggestion Of the beneficient return from the dead ot spirit able to help in the solution of a terrible and tragic difficulty. This suggestion has already been given by the reading of poem by Bret Harte which speaks of such d return from the grave at precisely that time of the night.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
scription, it would be billiard-cue or

scription, it would be biliard-cue or a golf-club.
 As far as working in the heat, pulling weeds with curved spine, and things of that sort are concerned, 1 decided that in my old age 1 would never kneel in the dirt again. The only real rest l ever enjoyed during my farm life was at the family altar in the morning just after breakfast when we all knelt in family prayer, andi1 fell sound asleep during those few moments, although l was supposed to have had refreshing slumber during the past night; or,per- haps, when our pastor came and we were all callediinto the parlor, which was only opened for prayer and on Thanksgiving Day, and we all knelt in the heat while the preacher prayed. had a long sleep then.
 can well understand the joyful ha- To of happiness that comes over man like you, in his declining years, who was the son of preacher with s50O a year salary, who lived in town, and who was brought up in allluence dur ing his early life, when he smells the new.mown hay and enjoys the privi- ege of pulling weeds in his own gar den and hoeing turnips and cabbages in his back yard. l realize how it Is possible for such man to give up the game of golf and exercise his muscles in pulling weeds, in bending his back over an onion patch, or welding a spade in digging a trench for the plant ing of watermelons and cantaIoupes. Let that son of minister enjoy the pastoral life to his hearts content, but as far as l and my people are concern ed, we will never join him or his in these pursuits. We do not want to turn him away from his ways of pleas antness or deprive him of the happi- ness of the precipitation that comes from following the paths of peace. He is joined to his idols, let him alone. Our precipitation is the precipitation of AttN NNRA-NNhAHNs .AAAt oet iAiNAASN i' AA"NN or lost in playing ball hole. Let the sweetened water mixed with vine gar prolong his life, as it will probably will, but to me and mine a cocktail with short life brings thoughts of joy when think of the past and read of your work in the garden.
 Now, you ask me to visit you, to join you in a trip, and you would fain spend a day, perehanee more, in show ing me ,the fruits of your physical workmanship as eNemplitied by grow ing cabbages and corn. Each blade of grass would have a lesson and every blooming squash a sermon. My golf clubs would be my side but where and witl whom should l play?
 Mediate alone upon the facts pre- sented to you above of farm life as l know il, think again of the golf game you once played before this terrible ru- ral, al,agricultursl, wanting. to- see things grow life grasped you, and then we will talk it over again and the trip you so kindly referred to.
 Yours sincerely,
 E. R. C.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22

The next issue of the Telephone Di- rectory will go to press on September 7lh. In order 10 assure that your name appears in this list, place your order for service previous to that date.
 The quickest route 10 the source of help in case of emergency is by tele- phone.
 Residence telephone service saves the housekeeper countless steps, time and money, and is convenience 10 every member of the household.
 Telephone service costs less than SC. a day and earns far more than this small outlay.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
Her Opportunity.

In an old French joke book is a story to the effect that when at Rome public penances were customary con lessor thought lit to order that one of his female penitents should be fiogged. She told her husband, and he volun- teered to undergo the penance for her. The wife was present at the fogging. and whenever the confessor's energies Jagged she would cry:
 "Flog harder, father. for you know I'm great sinnerr'
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
Pinto's Scheme.

It was Mir. Streeter. a London jewell er' who was instrumental in exposing the notorious old time swindler. Pinto. who claimed to have discovered the philosophers stone. His method con sisted in having bag or gold dust concealed up his sleeve. from which by an ingenious contrivance. he was able 10 squeeze the powdered meta. unnouced into the crueible. By this means he was able to melt a sovereign ana produce three or four times its weight in metaL-London Mail.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
The Shiny Coat or Suit.

It often happens that garment wears shiny while still servieeatle One hates to discard it and at the same time dislikes the appearance Of continued use. In such case bit of diluted distilled white vinegar rubbed on with woolen cloth will raise the nap and impart a look of newness that will give it a new lease of life. The garment will need good airing to re move the odor of the vinegar
 In this way the usefulness of a suit may be prolonged till it can be laid aside for a heavier or lighter one, according to the season.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22

COSTUME OF NAVY BLUE SATIN pr sOIE.
 Satin de soie is material that is having great vogue this fall and will be popular all through the winter both for suits and dresses.
 The fetching little costume illus trated is of this fabric in the new dark shade of navy blue. The skirt is narrow aud straight and slightly gath cred about the waist Two deep tucks form the skirt trimming
 The much exploited peasant waist is employed A rather novel neck treat ment is outlined with dull gold cord. edged with narrow black braid Black cord is drawn through the white nous seline chemisette. and cordeliere of black silk is attached at the waist line.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22

What David Starr Jo-!en Says
 David Starr Jordan. preS.isu' 'i '.' land Stanford university. n q tF'eA. address, in which he declared WOE. suffrage to be inev:t bla S3.d men have learned throueh r" poas.o. ity. women will learn, al %hen Y !. have learaed there will "e u'e degree of 4isdom to govecn the "oF.l, We need sta telp of borh men ',' women to Go the things that neru U. ing. The time is pasr when we felo,, women thes ballot because they oan-s fight, for tue business of kihhg ~ is coExng to an end.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22

Quick climatic changes try strong constitutions and cause, among other evils, nasal catarrh, q troublesome and offensive disease. Sneezing and snufii- ing, coughing and difficult breathing, and the drip, drip of the foul discharge into the throat-all are ended by Ely's s Cream Balm. This honest remedy harmful ingredient, The worst cases yield to treatment in short time. All druggists, 50c., or mailed by Ely Bros, 56 Warren street, New York.
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
New Hat Ornament.

Ribbon is being manipulated in a number of wonderfully clever ways on the fall hats. And perhaps the best imitation of the popular aigret has
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
To Subscribers of the Patriot


 According to Order No. BOT c she Post Office Department subscn- bers cannot be indebted to newspa- per more than one year and still have She paper sent to them at the second class rate. The order reads as follows:
 A reasonable time will be allowed publishers to secure renewals Of sub scriptions, but unless subscriptions are e1pressly renetoed after the term for which they are paid, within the follow Ing periods
 Dailles, within three months,
 WeekIies, within One Year, u tbev snail not be counted in the legitl- maie list of subscribers, and copies mailed on account thereof shdii not 6e accepted for maiitn9 at the second class postage rate of one cent pound but may be mailed at the transient sec ond class postage rate of cent for each four ounces or fractior thereof, prepaid by stamps affixed
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22

Have you a telephone in your home? If not, why nots
Putnam patriot., 1911-09-22
DailIes, within three months, x.,;tbin nna Y1af.
Editorial Scraps

Six young women are enrolled at th Albany Law School this fali-thfee 0 them newcomers.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
keeps PAGT
WOMAN SHOOTS
SELF AND SON
DOUBLE TRAGEDY FOLLOWS
AoREEMENTo OF THE WOMAN
AND3HER DYING HUSBAND.
DOCUMENT F0yADII I'm DRESSER
Il Would Be Wrong to Leave Son
Alone in World to Suffer Troubles
the Parents Had Experienced, Writ
ten Compact Says.

OXFORD. Me-, Feb. 13.-ln fulfill.
nent OF a compact made with her
husband during his lingering illness,
which death ended yesterday. Mrs.
lLynwood S. Keene took her own life
yesterday. after having fatally shot
her II year old son. Gerald. The com
pact dated about a month back, was
found by the coroner. In a sealed en-.
Ivclope in the woman's room.
Keene was oncera prosperous farm.
Ter, but according to the compact the
family had become impoverished and
discouraged during his lone sickness.
He was 38 years old and his wife a
year or two younger.
The document found in a dresser In
Mrs. Keene's room along with several
farewell letters to relatives, bore the
names OF both Mr.. and Mrs. Keene,
although the husband apparently had
been too feeble to make more than
his mark, his name being written by
his wife, The document reclted brief.
~ the family troubles. the result OF
Mr.. Keene's Illness. In 1t his death
was predicted and 1t was stated that
las both the. parents thought 1t would
be wrong to have their son remain tn
1.-The world to suffer the trouble they
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
ACCEPTS CALL
REV. GEO. E. sPRUiLL COMES TO
PALATiNE BAPTIST CHURCH.

REV. GEO. E. sPRulLL COMES TO
PALATlNE BAPTIST CHURCH.
Rev. George E. Spruill, of Cameron.
South Carolina, has accepted the call
extended to him by the congregation
OF the Palatine Baptist church and Will
enter upon his duties as pastor OF that
church about the first OF April.
The call was extended to Rev.
Spruill several months ago and an In
yitation was also extended to him to
come here and look over the ground
and conduct a series Of eyangelistic
meetings.
Rey. Spruill came to this place
about two weeks ago anu since that
time has been engaged in a series OF
meetings which have resulted in: a re.
viyal Of the church along all lines and
upwards OF thirty accessions have
been made 10 the church as u result
OF these meetings.
Tie church is fortunate to secure
the services OF Rev. Spruill, who Is a
splendid speaker and a conscientious
Christian man.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
For Mrs. Reilstein.

One Of the most delightful card
parties OF the season was that given
Yesterday afternoon from three to
five o'clock by Mrs. Herbert Brooks
at her home OIL Mechanic street, com.
p.imentary to her house guest, Mrs.
Oscar Beilstein, Of Pittsburg. Pa. The
house was beautifully and very effec!
lively decorated with American flags.
and bunting, suggestive Of the ami,
,versary OF Lincoln's birth. Eight
tables were used for euclire and the
progressive Prize fell TO Mrs, Frank
,Dennlson, It was . copy Of the Life
Of lincoln and Wassery gracioualy
PRESENTED to the honor guest, Mrs:
Ilellstein The lone hand prize was
bestowed on Mrs. w i. Newton. ii
carriedzoat the patriotic erectwith
rea and while casnations. tlsl With
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
CRITIC TEACHER.

Miss Jessie lee, who has taught the
Urinary grade of the Fifth ward school
for the past several years has been
appointed to the position of Critic
teacher in the Training department OF
the Fairmont State Normal school.
Miss Ice has taught successfully for
The past few years in the Fifth ward
school and the position to which she
has been appointed Is a responsible
one and one Of which she is deserving.
The place made vacant by Miss Ices
appointment will be filled by Miss
Lulu S. Hogg, Of Mannington. Miss
lHogg comes to this school highly rec.
commended having had experience in
the Warrington school as primary
teacher.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
The Curse Of CaIhaflics.

It hns long been known by the well
Informed that pills. oils. salts, caiomel
and other violent ,cathartics caused $ir-
,ritation Of tho delicate mucous mem
branc lining OF the Stomach and
Bowels. caused the Bowels to become
caiioused, deranged the Stomach, and
that In many cases the irritation or
arrangement extended also to the Kid.
neys and Liver.Syet owing to the tenn
.porary need of u laxative. anytpeople,
knowing this to be true, have resorted
to these harsh. harmful purgatives.
II you are among the number you
can vouchc for the truth of our state
nient that each dose taken left your
Bowels and system generally in worse
shape than before: that a}larger dose
must be taken from time toatIme, that
the point lis finally reached when YOU
ind sft necessary to change to some
other OF these vile remedies. with which
you repeat your experience with the
first, and SO on until YOU have gone
the rounds.
During all this period the necessity
OF using a laxative has been created,
your Stomach, and Bowels have become
irr.itated and .deranged. so It Ia not. sur
prtsfnS. that many people suffer from
Stomach. Liver and Bowel Troubles.
Not all these troubles come from this
one cause: most are. due directly or In
directly to Constipation. But the ca
thartics cause Constipation, and tfnsten
upon you the habit Of their Use.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
NOTICE 70 TAKE pEpostTtoNs.

ESSs'Se nv
PiB: swearfngen. plaintiff. VS.. bert
Marshall, defendant.
To Bert Marshall:
Take notice that we Shall, on the S,h
day Of March, 1911, at the office OF
5Showalter & Frame, Fairmont Trust
building, in the city of Fairmont, Ma
rion county, West Virginia. between
the hours of s o'clock a.. m. and. G
O'clock p. m. OF that day, proceed to
take the dispositions Of P. B. Swearin-
gen and others, to be, read in evidence
in my behalf In a certain, suit in chan:
Gerry. pending in the Circuit Court OF
said Marion county, wherein l am
plaintiff and YOU are defendant; and IL
from any cause the taking OF said
dispositions be not commenced on that
day, or. II commenced. be not conclud-
ed on that day. the taking OF the same
will be adjourned and continued from
DAY TO day. or from time to time, at the
same place and between the same
hours, until the same shall be com
.pleted.
P. B. sWEARINGEN.
sH0WALTER & FRAME,
Counsel for Plaintiff.
Feb. 6-13.20.27. z.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
. s@TERE0PTICON
At BAPTIST CHURCH.
DR.. SAMUEL G. NElE,a DISTRICT
SECRETARY OF AMERICAN BAP.
list PUBLICATION sociETYoF
PHILADELPHIA, LECTURES AT
BAPTIST CHURCH..

~ |F.r- ..#... !. HHHN.. H- Ln~
Sunday evening at the First Baptist
church on First street and Walnut
avenue, Dr.. Samuel C. Neil, Of Phlla.
.deiphia, district secretary OF the Amer
lean Baptist Publication Society, gave
an illustrated lecture before a crowd.
ed auditorium. which was highly APP
meciated. Dr.. Nell spoke on the sub
ject, America and his lecture was
illustrated by a number OF splendid
s%tereoptican slides. Besides giving
many realistic Illustrations OF America
and American life. Dr.. Neil told in an
interesting name the workings OF
the publication society along mission.
airy lines. The lecture was a brilliant
one and was much enjoyed by the
large congregation. DR.. Neil is a logi.
cal anu pleasing speaker.
On Sunday morning at the same
church Dr.: Neil preached a brilliant
sermon. using as his theme the attrac.
tiyeness of the Christian religion or
"Beautifying Religion"
On Sunday afternoon a Sunday
school rally was held at this church
conducted by Dr.. Neil. assisted by Rev.
L. E. Peters. Of Glarksburg; Rev. A. B.
Withers. Of Bridgeport. and Rev. NJ.
A. Summers, OF Parkersburg. This
rally was attended by a large number
OF people and was n most enjoyable
rally.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13

To all who sufrcr from c%onsffpatfon,
Dsnpepsla, I~ndiscstion. Headache, MI.
fousness, D~ixxtness, sctc.. we suy USE
FIELDs' PRUNE sYRUF AND SIENNA.
Unlike other laxatives, PHuSE
SYRUP restores tho natural action OF
the intestinal tract. Unlike other laaa.
tives, you do not have to increase tho
dose from time to time, but o. the 9th
er hand cam decrease the dose until It's
use Is no longer required. 1t gives
permanent relief.
vt does not irritate Tor dorangc the
Stomach. LIVER Or Kidneys, but stinaa-
lntes. regulates. %cleanses, aids diges.
ton, and at the ame timo IL Possessed
OF very valuable antiseptic and de-
mulcent properties.
The medicinal properties are at.
tained by scientific Combination Of
Herbs, whose VIRTUES. are extracted BY
methods used only by us. There Ia
nothing IN tpRUNE SYRUP to harm the
most delicate. It can be 5tnken by any
member of the family. does not intcr-
rere with business or pleasure, does
not sleken. or grippe: II is the perfect
laxative. ~Ffeaanut, Safe and SURE.
Are You going to use harmful ca
thartsss: or Will you be sensible and
iss "used IN all Well Regulated Fam.
llies;" Sold by all good dealers nj. COO
Send for Autographed booklet and
souvenir post cards. 81 lI.IV
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
Banks-D~ Davidson.

Mr.. Brooke Banks and Miss Rosa N.
Davidson, Of. ciarksburg, were united
in marriage at the home Of Rev. H.
r. Hess on Sixth street. Fifth ward.
Saturday evening at $3.50 p. m. The
best wishes OF their many friends go
With these splendid young people.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
c.$E. Social,

The Christian Endeayor Society Of
the First Presbyterian church will
hold Valentine social on Tuesday
evening at the church. The hours are
from eight 10 ten and the members 81.
the orgahizattonsan thef friends me
invited ID ~ present.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
VanGnder corbin.

Mr.. Thomas vanGilder. OF this city,
and Miss Ida Corbin. of Middleton,
were united in marriage on Sunday
evening at the residence Of the Off
chatting miniter, Rev. L. B, Bowers, in
the First ward. They Will reside In
|Fairmont.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13

ced today. Tickets already purclias.
ed will be honored on Thursday and
additional tickets can be secured from
any Of the ladies' of Christ church,
under whose direction the quartette
will appear here. The concert will be
given Mt the High School auditorium.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13

Honoring her guest. Mrs. Oscar
Reilstein, Of Pittsburg, Pa. Mrs. Fred.
Helmick has issued invitations for a
Wednesday afternoon tea at her home,
on Fairmont avenue.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
For Miss Sine.

Mr.. Robert McCabe entertained at
dinner last evening at Edgewood, Coun.
Try Club in honor Of Miss Mazici Sipe.
of Fairmont. Covers were laid for
.cight.-Charlestons Gazette.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
Main street.
P. e. Club This Evening.

There viii be a meeting OF The 70;
litical Equality Club this evening at
1880 O'Clock at the club apartments on
Jefferson street.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13
Mrs. Smith to Entertain.

Mrs, HE. Smith has issued invita-.
lions to the members Of the II. Q. G.
club iforyaktNaientine party to be given
on Tuesday evening at her home on
Bridge street. $$
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-13

blue Maline. a tempting salad sup
.l.er was served, the hostess being MS.
sisted by her daughter, Miss Mar
earet Brooks and Mrs. Charles E. Lam
terd.-Clarksbnrg Exponent.