Democratic messenger., 1911-11-18
TAKING TIVE CURE.
Graphic Pen Picture OF Carlsbad
and Its Dyspeptics.
MUD BATHS AND VILE WATER
The Victims Drink Often and Drink
Cecp and Absorb With the Evil Brew
Large Doses OF Misery-An un-
pleasant and Costly Road TO Health.

y city shaped Ike cup. cup con-
taining hot water. The sides of the
city are clothed with pines, aud In the
hollow lie the waters where the dys-
peptics Of the world forcgather to
drink and 10 be healed. They desire TO
be freed from excess of fat. from yell
low skins. from pains that catch one
In the small of the back and from the
stiff Joints that follow hard upon the
pleasures of the too abundant board.
In Carlsbad you drink often and
drink deep Drinking Is your main
occupation. Your drinking glass IL
strapped over your shoulders ms you
wander. slipping from spring to spring
as assiduously as any one bee. but
you do not get honey.
Your misery begins Mt q. At Go'clock
they call you. and you are expected 10
be shaved and decent before you face
the world of waters and of miserable
sinners nj : o'clock. II you had not
been miserable sinner. too. you would
not he here. but you have done those
things you ought not to have done and
you have left undone those things you
ought to have done, and your penalty
is Carlsbad.
So you take your place at the end of
queue 900 dyspcptics long and wish
you were dead You very nearly are.
for no "morning tea" sustains you: they
forbid that: II Is strictly against the
law. You take your turn at the "Spru-
der spring uncontrolled by the cook.
Everything contributes TO your misery.
A German close behind you Is tread
ing on your heels aud breathing loudly
down your neck. and n gentleman In
curious top hat IL conducting an or
chestra with intent to make you merry.
He fails You hate him. And every
moment you draw nearer to the "Spru-
del' spring. II leaps from the bowels
of the earth toward the roof of the
coonnade shrouded In It's own steam.
and a girl in waterproof overalls
catches you a glassful by means Of a
long pole.
Then you retire TO corner with the
evil brew aud try to drink IT, II tastes
of dead ratS-hot ones. long dead. Your
character may be OWNED by your
method of dealing with Il II may be
faced as one faces IA pet beverage.
with nm air" or II may BE- dallied with
IN sips-or thrown away. II may beat
you altogether. but this is rare. The
hardened dyspeptic who does his year
~ 'cure" has trick with n little glass
pipe. lie ~ initiated by the wise. Aft
er the first fell glass you hurry 10 the
little glass pipe stall and tuy little
glass pipe for your very own. and half
an hour later you brace yourself to-
gether for the second dose. II you
have sinned deeply you may be order
ed even three, but probably you will
be let or with two goes of "Sprndel'
and one of something lighter
An hour afterward you may have
an Inadequate meal OF sour milk, one
egg and browny roll that would baf-
fle dentist During the morning you
will be required TO undergo bath.
possibly OF mud. rceking with curative
properties and very expenslve-as ex-
pcnsive as the lunch you would like
You Even as II stands your mockery
Of meal. fruit. rice and bit OF
boiled bird climbs up to a total hither-
TO unassociate1 with such elementary
insufiiciencies. AZ o'clock you drink
more water N 10 the long day closes
with final gulp. and the dinner inter
vening Is beneath the dignity OF words
of any words.
Sixty thousand OF the sorrowful sub.
ject themselves to these penalties year
~ every summer.
But In spite OF the G0.0O0 you will
probably be lonely soul in Carlsbad.
Its dietetlc system does not make for
socability or mirth. But as the days
go by the pink hues of health begin TO
return TO your cheek. your color ceases
TO be drab and your temper becomes
less vile. You lind you can tolerate
your fellow man with some degree OF
courtesy even when he brenthcs down
your neck and clears his throat In the
region Of your ear. There Is less of
Hamlet about you and more of Puck.
for your days are ordered now more In
conformity with natures plan and your
reward IL an equnbility that Is foreign
10 the life OF broken laws In the place
from whence you came. For two or
three weeks this quickening process
will develop and continue until in the
exuberancc OF health you return 10
your land
When you are not here Carlsbad puts
its shutters up and goes away 10 cure
itself OF the tedlum OF having cure0
you. and by the time II has finished
with you its Golfers are quite COM
fortably stocked against u holiday. for
you were not n "cureguest" for moth
ing. Still you were cured. and n cure
Is always cheap. But on the whole
perhaps II would have been cheaper
II you had kept the law. London Mail.
interesting Spots.
81 SUPPOSE" SAYS the lady next door