davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
Slang AS 1t Is Slung

Dear Bill: If YOU were able TO peruse
nv last outburst through your sizzling
tears of jealousy you will TCCOllect re-
membering that l was Romeo and
the girl was Julie yet on a moonstruck
balcony at the junior prom.
Shades of Henry VIII, Hadst ever a
Nelson on Cupid on a mOOnstruck We
randall?
But. with a double -jointed B. Just as
l had coaxed the imp of OsCulation
close enough to see the whites of his
lamps, a fat guy with wilted neck
band crashed into the foreground to get
a few fresh airs.
Large evening" he caroled, as he
suffocated a law abiding little chair
I'm roasted"
Confided to the Circumambient at
mosphere that the largest evening ever
torn off the calendar shrivcled to a
half second in Halifax when glnN
with embongpong blew into it, and that
when 1t comes to being roasted, get in
the lee of the guy whose spoon is
snapped off al the handle.
But he wasn't hep. 1t went in one
ear like water off 4 ducks back !
mentioned that everybody loves a fat
man when he does the big end of the
telescope act: that a disappearing fat
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
Spinster Aunt's Advice

Dear Spinster Aunt: What do yOu do when
you think you have plucked the sweetest peach
on the tree of life and find its nothing but a
lemon that got into the garden Of love BY mis-
take?
In other words. how man break OF his
engagement without being tabo0ed in good So
Ciety and declared a bum. who trihed with
girls affections. to say nothing of perhaps
getting into court with breach OF promise
suit depicting his pocketboOk or putting him
into a cold, cold cell. where there are no
hot ba tbs and barber shops:
About year or so ago / met girl who
looked like the real thing TO me. and plunged
head over heels into the delirium that you
spinsters call love. but Is sometimes-hOwever
the fact remains that after / had popped the
question, been accepted and the marriage set
for sOue vague date next summer, | began to
wake up and see that the skies were just
blue when she wasn't around, and that the
birds sang Just as sweetIy when l didn't hear
her voice. and that other girls still looked
pretty. and some OF them much prettier than
she did herself.
In other words / dropped in a penny and
got wise to myself that instead Of being
really in love. I was simply crazy, and was
now convalescent.
Now mind, there's other girl mixed up in
this There's no quarrel upon which to hang n
theory Of broken heart; there's nothing
cPpt I'm moi much in lore | though;
was and I'm not eager I" support the girl
for the rest of my days.
I've gotten wise TO a few fits NJ temper and
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

some other characteristics that have rrhbed tho
bloom OF my romance, and | want to climb
out. How can | do Il? FI-SSEP
There are three ways such things
can be done. You tell the girl. let her
weep on your shoulder, and take a trip
TO some other town.
You behave unkindly to her, start a
quarrel, and end in a dramatic leave
taking. or you go about in slowly. for
getting to keep engagements and grad
ually break away. in the meantime TAX
ing to see her all the incest and best
looking men you know, in the hopes
that she may fall in love with one and
break it off herself.
None of the three ways are guaran-
teed: none of them. except, perhaps.
the last, will bring your letters back to
you. But, then, having plunged in, as
you yourself say, the path out should
be a hard one, so that you may, as
Solomon says. Learn wisdom as TO
womans ways" and beware the next
time.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

man, for a thing of beauty. has a col
lego yell done on both sides beaten to
a scramble.
But he stuck like glue with the will
lies. and got me so peeved | rose to
COra's feet, apOlogized like the perfect
little gentleman l always try to be.
shifted to my own understanding, and
pushed the ground from under Pudge
with my terrible No. {,
We heard him surprise a mud puddle
ten feet hadesward. But Cupid's a
mean little Cuss when you start any
rough house, so, Cora insisting, us TO
the ballroom. a bas lie fat man.
CHARLIE.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

Put me down for a new style book.
Kid" said the grocery clerk. I'm go
in to read up on that dernier cri chat
ter from Paris.
And when 1 get hep to what's COM
ing out in lacy lingerie I'm goin' to
wise up the boss and have him lay In
his supplies accordingly.
DO you get me, kid?
You see Mrs. wilberforce always
used to order her -four by the barrel,
but the new girl up there insisted on
having it in sacks and ordered two
sacks at a time. ] wouldn't have
thought it so funny but last Sunday
when l was goin' to church l saw the
new girl.
She had on her new harem skirt.
AN just above each ankle l. could
see a line of faint lettering which read
Made from Minnesota winter wheat.
she got it on Gift Pinchot on the con-
servation proposition"
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
Loretta's Looking Glass

for men are so constituted that they
cannot be made uncomfortable by a
woman and continue to love her I
imagine he purposely prolongs his
conversations while the dinner cools.
But let him pay the price. You just
go and eat while things are hot He
will soon discover that his stomach
resents bad treatment. 1t will make
him behave a good deal quicker than
you can by nagging. And stop nag
ging at the children. Whip them, but
do not nag. They do not like whip
pings. They get hardened to nag
gings.
But listen a minute. You were not
forced into marrying the man you
did, were you? You could see what
kind of a disposition he had, could
you not?
You knew he was easy-going. Then
why not play fair? If you married
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

NY DEAR LORETTA-Your
N lecturette on the woman
who nags makes me tired.
have a husband who always
wants to finish a conversation
when the dinner is getting cold.
He is easy-soing; and he encour-
ages our little girl to be like him.
He says it is a good deal easier
to live if you take your time
about it.
That is meant as a dig at me
because 1 want them to hurry.
My husband is never ready for
church; he seems to delight in
forcing me to scold. And ] am
tired of it. But some one has it
to do. 1t seems easy for you to p
point out faults. Can you give re-
ceipts for mending them?
A WORRIED WIFE.
Nagging is exploding nerves. Some
of the things you scold your husband
for are probably all right, only they
are just not your way of doing or
speaking. Nagging women generally
overestimate their own judgment.
Explosions never build up or create
anything.
NagSing follows the law of eXplo-
sions. Yours is blowing up your hus-
bands peace of mind. his comfort of
body. And it will blow up his love,
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
How He Won II

Miss Yangkie-And what has Lord
Chichester done that you think him so
interesting?
Lord De F'endus-He won a Derby,
v know"
Miss Yangkie-How lovely! On an
election bet?
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
No Sand

Nelle-Is that fellow of yours ever
going to get up the courage to pro-
pose?"
Belief guess not-hes like an hour
glass.
Nelle-An hour glass?
Belle-Yes-the more time he gets,
the less sand he has.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
Muscular Suffrage

Asked the progressive woman of the
beauty culturist: Don't you think
women should exercise the suffrage?"
certainly. My method will increase
it two nches."-Puck.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
NOT Life Size

II want a few colored illustrations
of beets and tomatoes"
Life size?" queried the artist.
"Catalog size" replied the scotsman
with a significant smile.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

SHE CAN'T WEAR HAREM SKIRTS
Ever see a mermaid. Jim?" asked
Dusty Rhodes, as he threw himself
down on the sands alongside of
brother hobo.
''Yaas," said Jim
What did she look like?" asked
Dusty.
''Oh, I d'no-rather like lady cut
decoletty, with a hobble skirt around
her propeller" said Jim.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09


when she manin roll
little with they're Belle your jools
N the doorknob
The thing almost happened the other night Bill and
took dance.
three hundred and OF the four hundred be there
thought Id show them what real dresser do when she has
spare
adjustin my sapphire gave my maid
that hold When
half out the door.
oh, she Il thought for the cook
Nonsensc her. VI the cook dinon They
make her conceited And know only that
nd 5 good o a leastt three times"
madlI wachin, l bcvc she's dishonest
Belle Bill says. the only difference bcin
o be 5 a few millions.
Rcely. Belle. don't think Id be if had
chance You can't be match raj If you're real rich Belle Suppose
felt that orned beef and what with would be the only thing
in the world hatd fill void at lunch Now if had
million instead OF eatin' with clear like do
I'd probably be peckn shoulder bite
OF nyfr ends lookn
then If had million. there probly wouldn't be
Oh we'll what's the
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
Crushing RetOrt

Mrs. Y (quarreling)-And what
would you be now if 1t hadn't been for
my money?
Mr.. x (calmly)-A bachelor. my
dear.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
M AMIE'S MONOLOGUE
About the Perls of
Riches Told to Belle
IN A TROLLEY CAR

y, BELLE, has your friend. Mrs. Drummon' found
her JOols yct-the that was stole comm
over from Europe, y know? Not that it matters
ng1ch-t was only matter of three hundred thou
sand or 50, wasn't it, A bag o shells
But it just goes to show that Us society women
can't be too careful. We haven't got no right, y
know, Belle, to lead the poor common people into
temptation. Now, there's Mrs. Drummon' ir
instance.
Absent-minded like. while shes changin' her
million dollar hobble for a damon studded harcm
* he lifts Ouart iOOIS off her and
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
The Barrier

She-But why is it that you get en-
gagged so often, Mr.. Jones?
He-Because 1 haven't the courage
to marry.
The Washington times., 1911-03-09
IncOmpatible

IF you had had the tiniest bit of
love for me, you would never have
married me-"
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

O
stockings; will make desserts; that won't
will do menia
for you until help the vote and until
promise O of buttons day
snckcrcd Mr. Pccvcd Go ii. How
long did it take to learn it:
This thing at snapped Mrs. Pccvcd Il
serious: We have all who belong the
Euual Rights Society, determined make this stand
"Aw forget and lcmmc read the paper said Mr. PccNed
kick make fool yourself
along with don't hand me
"Thats way cried Mrs Pccvcd "Ihas the with
tvrant mel Youth VIC canb &c aside by
"Aw. III ont interrupted Mr. Pecved. Nix the hot air
gets the moeons Who fixes the furnace and
the milk bottles? Who for the
me. me- And stand there and
YOUR going to stop looking things
Well mean said Pecvcd sitting down with
mined air Not another sock; no another BUTTON
right said Mr.. Peeved getting I'll drop line to
mother take charge
home.
Mrs Pceved looked uneasy. Il think she began.
vour mother nlawI shouted Mr.. Pecvcd.
And Pecvcd with got out darnng
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

DIM. said Mrs Pecvcd, glancing at her h"S-
band with determined look in her eyes. John,
| want to have serious talk with you.
Fire away" rctorted Mr. Pecvcd, chccriuy.
Get ii off your chest, I'm stcnn.
Then put down your paper snapped Mrs:
Pecvcd. Il don't want to talk to want ad.'
page
Mr.. Pcc,cd growlcd something under his
breath, skinned swiftly up and down the columns
and laid the paper down with sigh.
"Wcl2' he said, shortly.
"IoEn." aid Mrs. Pccvcd. getting up and
The Washington times., 1911-03-09

This is awkward. / f1irted with a
young man at the seashore, and we
both pretended to be rich. Now
find he lives in our city"
But you needn't see him if you
don't want to-"
Il can't well get out of it. 1t seems
he collects the payments on our
piano."
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-06-08

(Continued on Page Twelve)
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-06-08
THE CASH INTRIGUE

Continued nom Page TEMP
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-06-08

Sec TIP. R. Acres Total
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-06-08

Continued on Page Twelve-)
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-06-08

le Is SOW 10 7.24
10 Is SOW 7 1855
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
PAYS $4,000 FINE
Bethlehem Steel Company Mulcted
For Demurrage Rebates.

Bethlehem steel Company Mulctec
For Demurra9e Rebates.
Philadelphia, July 1.-Convicted or
Jan. 1 last In the United States dis
trict court in this city for receiving
demurrage rebates from the Philadel
phia & Reading and Lehigh Valley
railroads, the Bethlehem Steel com
pany paid over a fine OF 100000 i'm
posed at the time Of the conviction by
United States Judge Holland.
The $4,000 was paid by a CHECK
made payable to ]. Whitaker Thomp
son. United States district attorney
and sent 10 that official by John G
Johnson, principal attorney OF the
Bethlehem Steel company in It's fight
against the governments suit.
The two railroads were convicted
at the same time and under the same
act for granting demurrage rebates tc
the Bethlehem Steel company, and the
presumption Of the federal authorities
is that they. too. will abandon the in
ientlon OF appeal and pay over the
fines imposed. They were $4,000 in
each case.
The action brought against the
Bethlehem company and the two rail
roads was the first suit Of the kind
ever brought under the Elklns inter
state commerce law as amended In
1906. The law was originally passed
in 1903. but II did net apply at that
time to the granting and receiving Of
denurrage rebates.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
M'NAMARA's DEFENCE
Plan to Raise 100000 From Labor
Union Men.

TlaU " ndfoC @SSSfSSS v 'S'' ~6SNs
Union Men.
Indianapolis, Ind, July decisive
action has been taken by officers OF
international and national labor unions
who are meeting in Indianapolis TO
dcy Sc q plan to provide adequate de-
tense for J. J. Mcnamara. charged
with completely in California dynamit-
ing ouirages.
a committee drew up plans and out
lined the manner In which IL Is eX-
pecied funds for the Mcnamara de-
tense will be raised The report Of the
committee was adopted unanimously
by the conference.
Il is understood that the plan pro-
posed by the committee provides for
a contribution OF at least 25 cents from
every union man in the country. This
would result In at least 100000 being
raised within the next two months to
NEE, al expenses incident to the Nc
Namara trial for year. II II lasts that
long. The conference members we're Of
the opinion. il is said, that larged in
diyidual contributions would be OBJ
tanned. making the total fund nearly
$3.50 900
II was asserted In the conference,
according to reports, that Clarence
barrow. OF Chicago. who has been re-
tanned with six others for the defense
Of Mcnamara. would receive $50. 900 as
retaining fee.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
goth Day of July, 1911,

al ~ o'clock NJ. I'm front of the G.
II. in fredericksburg. Va, that val
liable tract OF land containing 675
acres, more or less, known as the
Rooney Gold Mine tract, situate In
Livingston Township, Spotsylyania
county. Va, about four miles from
Brockroad station on the p. +. & p,
Railroad, and the same property con
yeyed by John l.. Marye and st. Geo
r. Fitzhugh. trustees. to Hirsh &
Russell by deed dated December %
1888.
Terms OF sale-One-third (1-3)
cash, balance In one and two years
with interest, or all cash at option
of purchaser, deferred payments to
be secured by retention OF title un-
til the whole purchase money is
paid and the sale made subject to
approval Of the court.
The attention OF lumbermen is es-
pecially called to this sale, as they
will have the opportunity to pur-
chase one OF the finest timber tracts
known In this locality.
+. M. Chichester,
Lee j. OTdveS,
Granville II. Swift,
Special Commissioners,
fredericksburg, Va.
In the clerks office Of the Cir
cult Court of the county of Spotsyl-
vania. David Hirsh, plaintiff, against
Anshultz Hildreth ct ais, defendants
/, T. A. Harris. clerk Of the said
court, do certify that the bond re
quired of the special commissioner
by the decree rendered in sale
cause on the 5th day of June, 1911
has been duly given.
Given under my hand as clerk o.
the said court this 14th day o.
June, 1911.
T. A. Harris. Clerk.
liu22-w4w
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04

To Austin Lewis and to all per-
sons interested:
At delinquent tax sale held
before the courthouse OF Caroline
county, In the county OF Caronne'
State OF Virginia, on January sun
1903, for the non-payment OF tsAes'
returned delinquent on the hereihai-
ter described property for the year
1907 the undersigned became pur-
chaser Of a certain tract OF iand
in Caroline county, Virginia; asse
ed at twenty-five acres, ana s'anu,
inc ON the land books OF the saia
coyntv IN the name OF Austin Lewis,
and described as Linden or adJoin
Inc "T.inden" IN the said county but
Witch as surveyed by +. h. Travis.
and nlotted. which plot was return
ed and confirmed by Circuit Court
OF Caroline county on April llth,
1911 contains twenty-six (26) acres
and for which ! paid the amount
bid az sale, to-wit, $3.50 and on
which have paid all subsequent
taxes and leyies ACQUIRING thereon.
You will therefore please take no
tice of the said sale. and that on
Monday. January 18th, 1912. the
undersigned will request the clerk o
the Circuit Court OF Caroline COM
ty, Virginia. to execute unto the
undersigned a deed conveying unto
the undersigned the aforesaid and
above described real estate.
J. L. Fortune.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
ABLAzE $50 FEET IN AIR
Painter Takes Fire While Working at
Ton of Hioh Stack.

Top Of High Stack.
Pittsburg, Pa, July 1.-Two hundred
and fifty feet above the ground, sus'
pended by a rope that was burning,
and his clothes blazing from naphtha
and carbon oil, Chris Sinkas. a stack
painter. thirty-six years old, made his
way down Northumberland TO earth.
while a crowd OF men stood Mortified
at the Westinghouse Electrical and
Manufacturing companys plant In
East Pittsburg.
Sinkas held a rope In his left hand
to regulate the speed OF his descent,
at the same time using his right hand
I'm an effort to beat out tho flames
When he reached the ground his
clothing was almost entirely burned
from his body; be was terribly burned
about the right hand and arm, chest
and face, and his left hand was raw
and bleeding from being torn by the
rome as he made the swift descent.
Sinkas was painting a smokestack
built recently TO a new addition tc
the power house Before the tar Is ap
piled a mixture OF carbon oil and
naphtha is applied to the stack to cut
on the rust. Sinkas went TO the top OF
the stack Before starting to work he
lighted cigarette and tossed the
lighted match. he supposed. to the
ground Instead the match dropped
into a bucket Of naphiha and oil. Al
instant later an explosion occurred
and Sinkas. ahame, made his sensa
rional trip down the burning rope
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
TROOPS PROTECT SUSPECT

Feeling High In Cumberland, Nd.
Against Alleged AssaiIant OF GIRL
Cumberland, Nd, July Feeling II
50 high here as the result Of the as
sault on Miss Marie Bradour. eighteen
years old. the daughter OF William
Bradour. a wealthy farmer, living near
Cumberland, who was dragged into the
cellar OF her home and attacked, that
Company G. Maryland National Guard
Is under arms at the armory. subject
to the call OF States Attorney Robb.
The states attorney. perceiying the
ugly feeling, made the request OF the
governor that the militia be held In
readiness in the event that an at
tempt should be made to storm the
jail where Frank Holler. aged thirty
years, a suspect, is now confined. Hol
Ter Is a farm hand.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
MerIcans Burn Man at stake.

shawnee. Okla. July l. - Robert
Svayey. a Canadian. was burned at
he sake by Mexican bandits near
Fort Sumner, ~ ", according to a
le'ter received from Mrs. Emma Bing'
man. mother-in-law OF the dead man.
wazcy was killed because he refused
% reveal the hiding place Of a large
fuount Of money that had been left
u his care by a Mexican railroad that
employed him. the letter said. Mrs.
Eingman has advised the British gov
eminent OF the case.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04

New York, July Joseph b. Reich
mann. formerly president Of the Car
negie Trust company. was sentenced
by Justice Vernon NJ. Davis. sitting
in the criminal branch Of the supreme
court. to serve four and one-half
months in the penitentiary for max
ing a false report to the state banking
department of the condition OF the
trust company at the close Of business
On Aug. 81 last.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
TEN CRUSHED TO DEATH
Wcrkmen Buried Under Many Tons
Of Steel ard Masonry.

Wcrkmen Buried Under Many Tons
Of Steel ard Masonry.
Buffalo. n. T., July Ten work
men were crushed to death and hall
dozen others seriously injured In
the collapse Of the roof and other
parts Of the Buffalo water depart
ment's new pumping station at the
foot OF Porter avenue. on the lake
front.
Seven OF the men killed we're work
ing in the pit Of the pump house, aud
their bodies are buried beneath hun.
dreds Of tons OF steel. bricks and NOR
tar.
Most OF those injured we're at work
o nthe roof. which was 300 feet long
and 100 feet wide About 200 feet OF
this suddenly fell in The cause Of the
accident has not been determined.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04

In the name OF the Commonwealth
of Virginia. In the clerks office of
the Circuit Court. of the county Of
Spotsylvania on the Sth day Of June
1911, Thomas +. Alsop. plaintiff,
against Joseph Alsop and Carrie AL
sop. his wife; Maggie +. Smith and
N. Smith, her husband; Benz. Alsop
and Effie Alsop, his wife; Charles r.
Alsop and Cornelia Alsop, his wife;
Mollie 4. Farmer and William
Farmer, her husband, defendants.
The object OF this suit Is to have
partition OF tract OF land In Spot
sylvania county, Virginia. whereof
Benz. Alsop died seized and possess
ed, and for the plaintiff to recover
against the same money spent by
him in the payment OF taxes and
levies on the said property and for
money paid by him In discharging a
deed OF trust formerly on said prop
erty.
And an affidavit having been
made and filed that the defendants,
Joseph Alsop and Carrie Alsop. his
wife: Maggie f. Smith and N. Smith
her husband. Benz. Alsop and Effie
Alsop. his wife; Charles r. Alsop
and Cornelia Alsop. his wife; Mollie
E. Farmer and William Farmer. her
husband, are not residents OF the
State of Virginia. II is ordered that
they do appear here within fifteen
days after due publication hereof,
and do what may be necessary to
protect their interest In this suit
And It is further ordered that
copy thereof be published once q
week for four weeks in The Free
Lance and that a copy be posted at
the front door OF the courthouse OF
this county on or before the next
succeeding rule day after the entry
OF this suit.
Teste:
T. A. Harris. Clerk.
A copy-Teste:
Alvin It. Embrey. D. q.
T. A. Harris, Clerk.
a-WlW
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1911-07-04
SUSPECT HELD IN LONDON
Alleged Los Angeles Dynamiter May
Be EStradted.

Los Angeles. Cal. July IA man
believed TO be David Captain. one OF
the alleged Mcnamara dynamite con
spirators, is under surveillance In
London. Papers are being prepared
for his extradition.
District Attorney John ID. Freder-
ticks is in Washington comforting with
Secretary of State Knox regarding the
case. and il Is expected he will join
Detective William Burns in London
and bring back the suspect.
The first information Of the case
came from Secretary Knox to Gov
ernor Johnson, at Sacramento. Mr.
Knox is said to have received his In
formation officially through the British
embassy at Washington.