davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
A Telepathic Shock

Sc; ator Tillman of South
Carolina has the prize tender
foot .ory of the year.
In the south it is a proverb
that a negroes head is hard
enough to break a mules leg if
the mule is foolish enough to
kick it. If he does kick it, his
leg is broken, and the family
binds a paling to it, and he is
|of no further value as a beast
of burden.
One afternoon a negro girl,
about Is years old, was walking
up the road with difficulty, as
her feet were bound up in i'm
mense rolls of cloth. Her hair
on the top t her head seemed
to be a little mussed up.
"Whut de mattah wifi you ?"
one of her acquaintance in
quired.
"Mah foots is so'e," she ex-
planned. "Pap hit me on de
haid wifi his axe, and l was
standin' on some old iron.
Popular Magazine.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
: CANINE AuMoR.
Moro Marked In Monsrels Than Ia
Dogs With Pediarees.

More Marked In Mongreis Than IN
Dogs With Pedisrses.
generally End. writes a well known
English scientist. that mongrel dogs
when they happen to be sociable have
keen sense of humor. An aristocratic
dog with IL pedigree may have some
Inherited smartncss, but has no origi-
nality. a common yellow dog with no
ancestry to speak of, who has to gain
his living by his wits, could give him
cards and spades ut his own tricks in
two lessons
once l took into the house out OF
pity mongrcl yellow dog who insist
ed on installing himself at my door
step and always came back. no matter
how often he was chased away. had
Mt that time pedigrced water spaniel.
and tried to teach him some tricks
when took him out along quiet road
Mt times. The yellow dog, who made
friends with him. always came along
and beat the water spaniel at his own
tricks without training. Then he be.
gan to play tricks of his own on the
spaniel. When he had a bone he look
ed out for his comradc. and when he
saw him Looping alon:, he would lay
the bone in his path and disappear
The spaniel always made for the bone.
but the yellow dog. just as lie was
about to grab 1t, would dart from his
hiding place and, Selling 1t. run off
with it, This happened over and over
again. but the high bred spaniel never
tumbled to the joke New York World.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Making the cormorants Work,

The cormorants nre among the most
interesting and useful birds In the
world. They are employed in the
fishing industry off the coast Of Scot
land to large extent. They are cas-
i!v trained to work for their owners.
who place brass ring round each
Gf their throats 50 rs to prevent the
birds swallowing. They naturally feed
upon fish and soon learn to deposit
what they catch in their owners boats.
They display remarkable clevcrness in
time and n good fisher is worth good
deal of money to fisherman.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Communicated.

The District Convention of
the Daughters of Rebekah, held
at Logan yesterday was largely
attended, forty-seven members
going from this city; a number
fir I'm Council Bluffs attended.
The forenoon was devoted to
the regular business of the Or
der.
Missouri Valley was selected
as the place for next meeting.
Mrs. Bruce Starlin, of Missou-
ri Valley, was elected President
for the nextterm.
Initiatory work, was put on
by Staff of Dunlap Lodge, and
Memorial work, by Lillian lodge
M. 20, of Mo. Valley.
Speaking, reading of papers,
anil music was furnished by
Woodbine, Logan, and other
Lodges.
The State President, Mrs.
Helen Prescott, of Mason City,
was present, and gave a very
able talk on the state of the
Order, and the Orphans Home.
Refreshments wereserve1 by
the Ladies of the Christian
church of Logan, and 2 banquet
was also given in the hall at the
exercises. All went home hap
ply, feeling that our seventh con-
vention was a grand success.
A Rebekah.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11


Efforts are being made by a
Kansas City snake fancier to
have snakes installed in houses
to catch mice and vermin. He
says snakes are much better
than cats. We don't know
much about the ability of
snakes as little helpers around
the cellar, but it can at least
be said for them that they ere
not likely to disturb people by
wailing and screeching in back
yards at night.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
F.. +. GIDDINGs
DNTIST
Office over the Valley Banl
st. John Items

St. John Items
Mrs. Biernes, of Missouri
Valley, spent Friday and Sat-
urday the guest of Mrs. w. p.
McCullough.
C. E. Haight has the founda-
ton laid for his new house.
M. Altman left Friday for
Honey Creek, where he is bal
ing hay.
Mr.. and Mrs. T. A. Denton
entertained at dinner Thursday
Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Williams, Of
Oklahoma, Mrs. Morlan, of
Omaha, Mr.. and Mrs. Dan Skel-
ton and Mr.. and Mrs. Martin
Williams, of Missouri Valley.
Chas. Christensen and John
Cumys, of Missouri Valley,
were st. John visitors Friday.
Chas. Tickle spent a few days
last week at the Pitzer home.
Miss Lottie Kirkland has
been on the sick list but is re-
ported much better.
w. E. Mccullough attended
the Odd Fellows convention in
Logan Friday.
Mrs. Jno. kirkland and chill
dren, of Cal junction, visited
with st. John relatives the first
of the week.
Mrs. S. K. and Mr.. and Mrs.
J. F. McGavren had as Sunday
guests Mr.. and Mrs. E. A. Boies,
Mr.. and Mrs. r. L Linsley, Mr..
and Mrs. j S. McGavren and
Mr.. and Mrs A. N. Brown
F A. Heath was a st. John
visitor Tuesday.
Geo. Colver and a force of
men are building a fine new
cottage for Herman Jones, east
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

Of St. John. It will be ore Of
the neatest cottages in this
part Of the country when Geo.
gets it finished.
A. L. Haight is having the
brush and timber cut along the
road on his farm between St.
John and Loveland and when it
is finished Road Supervisor
Shelton will commence widen
ing the road, which will be a
great benefit as we'll as an i'm
provement.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
The Modern Child

Born scientifically,
Studied terrifically,
Clothed very carefully,
Dieted sparefully,
Aired Systematically,
Bathed most emphatically,
Played with quite drearily,
Punished Spencerially,
Sweet infantility,
STEPPED in gentility.
Santa Claus banished,
Mother Goose vanished,
Where are the babies,
The real human babies
The olden times knew
Harnessed scolastically,
Drilled superdrastically,
Cultured prodigiously,
Lectured religiously,
Classified rigidly,
Reasoned with frigidly,
Loved analytically,
Listened to critically,
Dosed with "ologies,"
Rushed through the colleges
Crammed pedagogically,
"Finished" most logically,
Where is the childhood,
The fresh, happy childhood
The olden times knew
Children successfully,
Reared thus aggressively.
Posing eternally,
Wearied Internally,
Planned for initially,
Formed" artificially,
Will they submit to it?
"Never cry "Quit" to it?
Will not analysis
Stop from paralysis,
Till our distraction
Ends with reaction,
Brings back childhood,
The bright, careless childhood
The olden time knew
james F. Morton, Jr.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
An Industry Threatened

"What you want to do is to
have that mudhole in the road
fixed," said the visitor.
"That goes to show" replied
Farmer Co-ntasse], show little
you reformers understand local
conditions. I've purity nigh
paid off a mortgage with the
money made haulin' automo-
'biles out o. that mud-hole."
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Good Laws Might Help

The editor of the Britt Tri-
bune is credited with the fol-
lowing: One day member of
the city council came to us and
said: ''You ought to write an
article every week on the sub
ject of dragging the roads and
get the farmers interested in it
so they will do this work" We
went out on the street and ask
ed the first farmer we met,
chow did you find the roads?'
ooh" he said, "they were not so
bad until l got inside the cor
poration, and then / found them
cut up so they were a fright. !"
We asked him what we ought
to do about it.
"Why, print an article every
week and roast your town coun-
Gil and mayor until they fix the
roads into town so they are
passable inside the corporation. y
And then we went back into
the Office and wrote an editorial
on the methods of teaching a
spotted calf with a hump back
how to drink without bunting
the pail over and spilling the
milk down the back Of the
teachers neck.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Speaking of the Weather

Mitchell, S. D., Republican:
This is the period when the old
settler comes forth and tells of
the pioneer days when weather
like this was easy, and that not
withstanding icicles were prev
alent in May the biggest crop
of all years was lr duced.
There is no OCCASION to be
frightened, and the best way to
keep your nerve is to watch the
attitude of some of the men
who have gone through with
thirty years in this country.
When they commence to shake
their heads in an ominous way
then there is time to join the
worry club. Up to the present
time the thirty-year men have
carried a level head and have
not allowed it to wobbIe in the
least.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Spare Change for Decorations

Notwithstanding the fact
that the financial situation does
not suit everybody we do not
seem to be actually suffering
for spare change. We spent
last year for jewelrv bought in
this country S80O,00O,O0O; for
gum. $25, 100000; for candy
S7a, 100000 and for soft drinks
,ver the soda water counters
1920, 100000 Chicago Int r
Ocean.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Lottery Chances.

NJ. Henri Poincare. the mathemati-
clan. told us a few years ago that If
every one who buys n lottery ticket
knew how little chance there was of
any one winning prize there could be
no successful lottery. The chance Of
each was about equal to the danger
of being killed in railway accident
London Truth.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
African Giants.

There are many giants in Africa nine
feet high. Some of them weigh 300
pounds and are strong enough to kill
a panther Mt one blow. Perhaps you
think such big fellows must be clumsy.
but they are not. They can run faster
than any horse. springing twelve to
fourteen feet at leap. This all sounds
like fairy story, but not SO when you
hear that these African giants are
ostricheS.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Thu Greater .E;eld.

',Fntsssn am not sure whether
shail be specialist for the ears or TIL :
teeth"
%haase the tveth. my boy. Every
one his fh'ytv ran Of them. hat only
two e.ss." London TTt ntfs.
A Brooklyn woman who sued
q mar for kissing her has secu-
red damage in the amount of 6
cents, The man who got the
kiss must feel pretty cheap.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
I'll ann looliing for crane on the door,,
How Fieldino Spelled His Name,

The Ficldings are an ancient race,
and the Dcnbigh earldom dates from
1922 BY the way. there is n funny
story as regards the family name and
It's spelling. The author of Tom
Jones" was one Of the race, and the
then Lord Dcnbigh said to his relatives:
why don't you spell your name Field
ing as the rest Of us do and not
'Fieding'Y'
The writer made answer. Because
am the first of the family who learn
ed to ell."-London Gentlewoman.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
How She Got 1t


A little girl was sent by her
mother to the grocery store
with a jug for a quart of vine
gar.
"But, mama," said the little
one, 81 can't say that word!"
but you must try" said the
mother, "for | must have vine
gar, and there's 90 one else to
send"
So the little girl went with
the jug, and, as she reached the
counter of he store, she pulled
the cork cu. Of the. jug with a
pop, swung the jug on the
counter with a thud, and said
to the astonished clerk:
"There! Smell of that ard
give me a quartz Mothers
Magazine.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

The Minnesota Agricultural
College has q six year old Hol-
sire Cow, that has produced
145 p'unds Of butter in the last
thirty daysl
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
In New York,

"rhc woman across the hall from
us is dead"
"How did you find that out?"
"Why. I happened to see it In the
paper."-Lifc.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
Heainnino Youno:

PARENTS my boy precocious. do
YOU think? School .Principal-Yery
He told tho teacher he had been sitting
up with sick friend.-puck.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
History Repeated.

We have just had another
Boston Jeopardy, not in Boston
harbor this time, nor of tea, but
in Alaska, and of Coal. 1t is
reported that the Alaska Steam
boat Company are shipping into
Alaska large quantities of Can
adam Coal, and the Coal miners
of Alaska met the ships and
tumbled the coal overheard into
the ocean, as our fathers did
the high taxed tea, into
the Boston harbor. This is a
rather rough way to dispose of
Objectionable goods, either tea
or coal, but if we approve of the
Boston tea party held by our
fathers, why not the Alaska
Coal party?
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

Allan ic, I,,wa, is to have an
Aviatien me 4n that live little
city, in the near future. We
know several "hign flyers" in.
that city, but we never heaATot
them pulling off events" a. til ,
fair grounds there.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

Sincerity is the basis of9sall: true
Friendship. Without sincerity tits like
II ship without ballast.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

The housewife who com.
blamed that she chad longed
for ten years to possess a brass
bed, but now that she can get
one she discovers that she
wants a Napoleon bed in ma
hogany," has unwittingly sum-
med up the whole phenomenon
of human life. Practically all
| of our pleasures come from an
ticipation. Realization is much
less colorful and pleasurable.
The woman who had pictured
for years a nice solid brass bed
sitting on her rosetoned carpet
beside the mahogany dressing
table, and had warmed her
spirit in the roseate flames OF
that anticipation, has practical
ly exhausted all the possibilities
in the ownership of sucn a
treasure. The treasure itself
amounts to much less.
1t is so with life. In youth
we look forward longingly to
the day when we can buy all
the chocolate creams that we
can eat, but on arriving at that
delectable estate we discover
that very few satisfy us. An
ticipation]'dwelt upon a big
round seal muff, but realization
lshows IS that round muffs are
passe, and that, besides, mink
is the thing. We dream of ar
automobile-and before it is
realized the flying machine ap-
pears on the horizon. Desire
is much; realization is little
Give us our anticipations.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11
iFeeIinu For Death.

For week the self appointed guide
to tho blind on their, daily walks had
noticed that the two men who were
her special charges felt carefully Of
the wall on either side Of the door OF
the asylum when passing in md out.
Since she was there to lead them. that
precaution seemed not Mt all necessary,
ard she finally asked their reason for
1t. i
81 am looking for Grape on the door,"
one old man told her. "Thcy don't
like to let us know hero in the asylum
when any one dies for fear OF making
us feel bad, but they put Grape on the
door, and by feeling for 1t when we
pass in and out we can find out for our
selves when one of us has gone" New
York Press.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1911-05-11

Ladies handbags at iShileya
Drug Store.
The Daytona daily news. [volume] (Daytona, Fla.) 1903-1926, 1911-03-03
BOND SANDSTONE BRICK CO.
Manufacturers
Light Granite, Buff, Red and
Drab Brick
Large Capacity Insurrs Prompt Ship
aents. Writ. for Booklet and Prices.
LAKE HELEN, FLA.
LAKE HELEN

Surrounded by several pretty lakes
and guarded by lofty pine trees is
Lake Helen, winter resort Of no
little importance. Camp Cassadasa,
spisitualistic camp ground is stu
ated near Lake Helen and at this
place several hundred people make
winter headquarters. A large lumber
mill and the largest brick plant in
the South are located at Lake Helen.
ORANGE CITY
The principal attraction around
Grange City is the MANY handsome
golden orange groves. The town is
supplied with water said to be the
purest in the world, another attrac-
ton to visitors. 1t is at Orange CITY
that passengers over the Florida East
Coast Ry. transfer to CARRIAGES and
drive to Deland. The town is sur.
rounded by land peculiarly adapted
to the cultivation Of citrus fruits.
The Daytona daily news. [volume] (Daytona, Fla.) 1903-1926, 1911-03-03
DrI AND. THE ATHENS OF FLORIDA
|DELAND D,
the county seat OF
Volusia County.

-, AoS County s~s "a
Volusia County,
is situated q miles southwest of i
Davtona and is reached from the lat |
ter city by an excellent hard-surface
road recently constructed
At DeLand is located the John b.
Stetson University, one of the lead
Ing educational institutions of the
South. Because of the interest in
matters educatiora. DeLand is known
as THE Athens of FloridD-"
stetson University has a faculty of
50 professors and instructors. There
arc over $4,000 In buildin&s and
equipment; nearly 100000 endow-
ment; a Carnegie Library alone rep
resentink an investment in building.
endowment and books, Of more than
$4,000 The library is the United
States Government depository for the
State of Florida, and contains over
5000 volumes. Science Hall, one
of the newest Of Is buildinkA with
its Furnishings, represents IN outlay
of $4,000. Elizabeth Hall is one Of
the most beautiful college buildings
In the South.
The city has = population of shout
$780, with = thickly settled country
adjacent. DeLand proper is FIVE
miles east Of the St. Johns River, on
the high, rolling pine land of the
great Orange Ridge" Of Florida
The predonainatink products are
oranges and grapefruit. the estimated
crop from this vicinity being over
100000 boxes this year. CrapeA
peaches, pears. Japan persimmons.
plums. pecans. fuavas. Strawberries
and other fruits are grown in plenty.
In the way of public improvements
are many miles Of fine shell roadss IN
excellent high school, electric lights.
q system of waterworks that is owned
and operated by the city. supplying
the purest water at little cost.
Nine houses of worship testify that
DeLand is \ church-eoink commu-
nifty. Baptists. Episeopalians. Meth
odists (Northern and Southern, Pres
bvterians, Christians and Catholics
besides colored Baptists and Metho-
dists, are represented.
The graded school offers = ten
years course, and the building which
it occupies is newly furnished
throughout, and is one of the most
commodious and best equipped pub
lie schools in the State.
The trip from Daytona to DeLand
is made by automobile in a little
over an hour, and there are many
pretty drives in the vicinity of the
county site. A good road leads te
DeLeon Springs. five miles, histori<
spot, where 10000 gallons of waite,
bubble from the earth every minute
From DeLand automobiles 70 soutf
to Osteen, IS miles, ON she'll and
mari roads; the st. Johns is crossed b.
ferry near Osteen and cars can thez
continue to Sanford and Orlando By
hard road. There is = she'll ROAD
from DeLand to Orange City, fv.
miles, and good road from DeLank
to Lake Helen, like distance.
The Daytona daily news. [volume] (Daytona, Fla.) 1903-1926, 1911-03-03
PICTURESQUE PORT ORANGE
PORT ORANGE is
q pretty little village
situated nve miles

= VIZ = OAOAA Avn ~
q pretty little village
situated nve miles
south of DaytOnn on
tn Dayt0na N ew
Smyrna hard . sur
fnce road, the scenic
highway Of the East
Coast. The town is
located ON the Hall
fax River, and is
ooonected With the
peninsula opposite
by . brldge.
The town Is we'll
laA out and has
many pretty homes.
A lafge number Of
1ousaGts and winter
WoAdeut0 make Port
Ora1geW winter head.
Q0a1eers, enc Of the
eVeeol attractions
Rlug the excellent
0ahing.
A short distance
west Of Fort Orange
arc che remains OF
she old Dunlawt0n
sugar mill, a place
that % visited every
year by hundreds OF
tourists. One time
all the country west
Of Port Orange. sur.
rounding the old
MIL, was q vast In
digo and sugar cane
plantation. The mill
Was operated extern
sively In those early
days but has been IN
disuse for forty OF
nfty years.
A very interesting
drive from Dayton,
- by ocean teacf
to the approach o
the Port Ort.ng,
bridge, across tn.
hr:dr.a and theI
passing through thu
principal street o
Port Orange TO TIL
ruins Of the eel"
br:lted old sEga
mill, returning 4
Dnytona by the ro:,
ON the nainland.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1911-12-01
WINTER SCHOOLS FOR FARMERS


% lot by the State College and Experiment Station These
IN convenience and are planned give the best and latest
most possible profit and pleasure out of it, Foenoon will be devoted
to field laboratory orchard practice
illustrated lectures
in
ing Soil Management and Crop
uon Household of
upy the students Special
and gasoline practice
nome treatment of accidents sanitation
except room and board For further
e week Short Course Lnden Six
rangemens in charge of c. E. Cline, LINDEN
in Soils Fruit
Cashmere Commercial Club.