davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
Where the Laugh Comes In
A little car,
 And there you are, A little way to roam, Stuck in the mud Up to the Hub.


 That's why we don't go home.
 St. Louis Times. When the train stopped at the little Southern station, the Northern tourist sauntered out on the platform Under a scrub oak stood lean animal with scraggy bristles. The tourist was in- terested. "What do you call that ?" he inquired of a lanky native.
 "Razorback hawg."
 Well, what is he doing rubbing against that tree ?"
 "He's stropping himself, mister, jest stropping himself. ."-Housekeeper. A young man should not believe everything firt doesn't say.-Lippin- cott's. II don't see why he wants to marry her, he has only known her a week." "That's the answer."- Houston Post Lawyer" Where did he kiss you?' She" On the mouth, sir"
 Lawyer-"Oh, no. Where were you ?" She" In his arms. Variety Life "Dld your husband give you that black eye?"
 "No; my husband is in prison for giving black eye to the lady who gave it to me."-P I, P.
 "I've heard that young Bullion is going to marry the cook. What does his father say ?"
 Says he doesn't care so long as they don't let her go out of the family" Judge.
 Waiter (to night nurse watching patlent)-" Have some coffee, ma'am !" Night Nurse" No I greatly fear that that would keep me awake."-Le Rire. q suppose you have heard of the danger in kissing?" he remarked ten tatively.
 1T have," replied she; "but come of family noted for courage. Int Bits. Sillicus -" How do you account for his extreme popularity ?"
 Cynicus-" He never tells the truth about anybody unless it is absolutely necessary" y."-Philadelphia Record.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
Give the Women a Chance.

Los Angeles contains body of very chivalrous men. They have formed a club to "protect women from the ballot" AS the ballot is about the only effective defensive weapon which can be put into a woman's hand-save the hat pint is very mean and upgracious for men to wish to keep her from it's possession. When women do obtain the ballot it will be pitiful if they fail to make no better use of 1t than the men have done. The modern woman is quite capable of taking care of herself and many of them are even supporting men who have the ballot, Middletown Sun.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Says the Farm Journal: Many good man is in such haste to let the world know where he stands on the tariff, re- ciprocity. and the direct election of Sen ators. that his patient wife cannot find out where he stands on the important domestic questions of water in the house and a new carpet for the parlor. Save the country. brethren; that's right but don't forget to save the wife, for after all, what is the country to you when you have lost good helpmeet? ...
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
NORTH CANAAN HAS

A population of 2,171, Census of 1s10.) Two railroads.
 National and Savings Banks. Trolley railroad extending through the Berkshires to Pittsfeld and beyond. Up-to-date High School and first-class school system.
 Five churches.
 First-class hotel.
 Fire department including chemical en- zine.
 Six miles of State Roads. Electric light and power plant, Complete Sewer System. Never-failing water supply and the best water in the state.
 Wide-awake Business Mems Association. Extensive lime and iron industries. Fratern Il and benefit societies. Brass band.
 Up-to-date department storas. Pure air and wholesome climate.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

"Get together and pull together, "says the Connecticut Western News. "That's s what keeps the ball a'rolling." True ; but when it is, "Get together and pull hair," the ball is very likely to get lost in the shuttle l- Bridgeport Standard, Very likely; but even if it's hair pull. ing match, the admonition holds good Pull Together :. V
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

"The Courant" sighs for the good old days when brave man laid down an open ballot and said right out in meet ing, "That's the ticket I'm voting. "- Courant. Others sigh for the same sane and sensible style of voting. Why not start an agitation that shall bring about a return of those ''good old days?"
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
THURSDAY. OCTOBER 1a. 1911
RETTER fo RE RleHT

It is better only sometimes to be right than at ali times to be wrong. Before I resolve to do one thing or the other I must gain my confidence in my own ability to keep my re- solves when they are Lincoln
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
Amounted to No.hinr

The status of the beef trust prosecu- tion Is exactly where 1t was the day the first papers were filed nearly decade ago. The much -heralded prosecution |" which has been directed by one Repubh. can attorney general after another has amounted to less than nothing. Middle town Press.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
When in doubt follow the crowd.

That was a clever play on the name ]" Lohengrin," made by the society re- porter who wrote that at the Astor- Force marriage the "Long Green !" wedding march was played.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

The Elizabethtown Post says this as we'll as anybody can "To save an editor from starvation take his newspaper and pay him for it promptly. To save hlm from bankruptcy, advertise in his paper literally. To save him from despair, send him every item of which you can get hold; to save him from profanity write your correspondence on one side of the sheet and send it in as early as possible. To save him from mistakes, bury him. Dead people are the only ones who never make mistakes
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

William O. Johnson, of Newtown. who has just been elected first seleotman of his town, has a unique political rec. ord. He is rock-ribbed republican, and Newtown is an invulnerable dem o. cratic stronghold; yet Johnson gets any thing he goes out for. He was elected representative to the legislature of 1909, reelected for the 1911 term just ended, and last week was elected first selectman over the strongest democrat that could be picked in that democratic burg
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
AS AN ADVERTISING MEDIUM

The News should appeal with special force to the sagacious business man. .#
 It has an extensive circulation in Western Connecticut, and especially throughout Litch- field County and Southern Berkshire.
 It has competent staff of wide-awake cor respondents in the various towns to report the local doings each week, and goes into the homes and is perused by the entire families of the thrifty, intelligent reading class of people whom the long headed advertiser most desires to reach.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

It has come to be the orthodox thing, at the cattleshows, nowadays, to have as the thrilling feature, an aviator falling out of his flying machine and being carried to the hospital or the morgue.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
OUR TRUST.
BY EMMA RoDEMEYER WATT

Iris such blessed thing to know There's One who understands Who holds our lives and all VIC love Securely in His hands. We'll fold all cares and fears away, And simply, fully rest, Knowing the One who understands Does all things for the best.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Referring to the open week for deer hunting in Massachusetts, the Boston Transcript says: "The open week for deer in the four western counties of the state IS doubtless anticipated with more or less dread by the quieter citizens of that section. The experiences of year ago were not very satisfactory"
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Sir Thomas Lipton wants another chance to try to "lift" the America, Cup. Sir Thomas is persistent yachts man and '' dead game sport" But
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Get together. Pull together. That's what keeps the ball a'rolllng-Connecti- cut Western News. Good slogan any where. Bristol Press. t.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Massachusetts is bragging over a snow storm that fell last week. As if It were something to be proud of.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
THE NEWS AGENTS

Extra copies of The News are on sale at u 61ceof publication and at
 Dempsey's Drug Store, Canaan, EgglestoE's Drug Store, sharon, Post office, East Canaan. '.- q D. H Oakes Store. Lakeville,
 Post Offlce. Falls Village. George T. Johnson's Store, Norfolk, F. H. Smith & Co.'S Store Ashley Falls. w D. French, Sheffield, Mass.
 A. L. Dickinson. Salisbury.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Subscribers are requested to notify the pub tisFer promptly of any failure to receive papers regularly, changes of residence etc.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
WRITE LETTER ARouTIT,

Communications on subjects of general inter est to The News readers are invited, but no attention will be paid to anonymous letters.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

{ The election excitement has died down since the election has become a thing that was.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

Get together. Pull together. That's the way to hobble the kickers.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR SALE-Fowls, broilers; walnuts and ap-
 pes. H. Fl. stanton, Canaan,
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR FALE--A fine Service Hog. one and one half years old Win sell or exchange. because be is related to my stock H. P Morse, Falls Village.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
WANTED

single man to work in general store Must have good education and furnish references. One having experience preferred. Address Careful, care Conn. Western News.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR SALE-1e Black Minorca Cockerels, S. C., six months, full blood, cheap. Rev. H. Corn ford, Canaan.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
Cent-a- Word Advertisements
 Minimum Charge 25 Cents
FOR SALE

FOR sALE-I will sell for cash cheaply, a Canvas Glove Manufacturing outfit conaiat- ing of dies, cutting block, cloth rack. band cutting table, and glove turning machine Everything in good condition. Here Is good opportunity to get hold of money making business cheaply. Address,
 Miles l.. Blodgett, Fails Village. Conn
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12
MISCELLANEOUS

AR EATEN, optIcian of Torrington, 1onn.,
 will be at The Canfeldn hotel the first Mon- day and Tuesday afternoons of each month.
 If unable to call send postal. Consultation free.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR SALE--An K. M. F. 5-passenger touring car Thirty horse power, fully equipped, top and side curtains, wind shield. speedometer and clock, presto-light tank, gas and kerosene lamps, luggage carriers 8 extra shoes. inner tubes, tools, etc. 1910 model, nrst-claas oon- dition. Would be pleased to demonstrate at request. Price S650. Herbert Eggleston, Miilerton, N. T.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

100 Plants of Baby Primrose Primela Forbesci and Primrose Obcoai sa in 21kin pots just com plumosus navlus---iex Cegonias and Ferns, Rose M Adam.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR SALE Hubbard squashes. L. H. Kellogg.
 Falls Village, Conn. #
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

FOR RENT-Four rooms in the Porter Building Enquire at Rains Bakery.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

PEABODY-Optometri and Scientific Optician, will be at Mrs. Nj. A. Halls Falls Village, Ct, Oct is, 10, and at Maple Shade Inn, Salisbury, Ct, Oct. 20 21.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

HRS. M. c. DEAN will have a fine collection of Ladies' Hats from Miss Cora Brown early in October. She will also make a perso nal selec- tion of Hats from the wholesale houses of New York.
Connecticut western news., 1911-10-12

$500 REWARD-Lost a diamond sun ray pin with fresh water pearl center. The above re- ward will be paid by returning it to the Bar tram, sharon, Conn.
 STRAYED-Three months old Holstein Heifers, One with strap on neck M C. Dean, Falls Vii. lage, Conn. ..
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

The union labor attorneys of Los
Angfieles have prepared suits against
Mayor Alexander and Chief of Police
Sebastian, and the directors of two
or three corporations aggregating, ST.
100000 in damages. The suits are the
result of recent arrest of 95 union
men who were charged with conspir-
acy to do picketing. The suit will be
entered: "An action for conspiracy
and false Imprisonment"
Delegates from the Chicago Fed.
GRAFTON Of Labor and the International
Association of Machinists are work.
ing to influence the board of election
commissioners to purchase only vot,
ing machines that bear the union
label. 1t is stated that IL voting ma.
chimes are introduced which do not
bear that label objection will be SCUM.
ded by 100000 union men in Chicago
and that the matter might even GO
so far that the men might refuse to
vote
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Jackson. Miss. June 24-The sur
prise of the week in the Cotton states
League has been the victories of the
second division teams against the
league leaders. and it is beginning to
look like there will be a lively miX-up
at the finish.
JacksOns two straights from Hat
tiesburg, and the defeat of Vicksburg
by Yazoo City on Friday, has revived
the spirits of the disheartened fans,
who are beginning to think that the
fight for the pennant is not yet over
by any means.
In reality, the six teams composing
the circuit have been playing In almost
complete reversal Of form during the
past few days. Four straight victories
for Jackson is nothing short of aston
ishing, something that hasn't hap
pened before this season, and the bugs
and bugesses are beginning to enter
tain a sneaking idea that the much
derided team may have an ambition to
duplicate the record Of 1908 when
Jackson took fourteen straights and
went almost from the bottom of the
percentage column to the top and held
that position until the finish.
Hoping for pennant honors when
.175 points behind the league leaders
sounds just bit foolish, bit hope Is
favorite food with the fans, and new
er disagrees with the digestion. Ger.
tain it is, the Drummers are display
ing a remarkable and wholly uneX-
pected strength, and the same is true
OF the Meridian and Yazoo City teams,
while on the other hand there are
some surface Indications that Hatties-
burg and Vicksburg are Just a bit
stale. In Fridays game Carlos Smith
was the only Timberiack who clouted
the ball with any degree of frequency
Tutwiler, the star infelder of the team
picked by scouts as big league mate
rial, is decidedly off is feet, and played
like an amateur during the Jackson
series.
Meridian is so anxious to become a
contender at the finish that Manager
Waldron, has purchased a big league
outfielder who is due to report fol-
duty within the next few days.
The first series of the coming weel
will probably determine whether Jack
son or Meridian shall hold fourth
place as they are pitted against eact
other for series at Meridian.
Hattiesburg and Vicksburg play a
Hattiesburg, and neither team car
hope to make a substantial gain IL
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
One Thing He Noticed.

The old man had given his son very
fair education and had taken him into
his shop The young fellow was over
nice about a great many things. but
the father made no comment. One
day an order came In from customer
Il wish to goodness" exclaimed the
son, that Gibson would learn to
spell!' Whats the matter with it,
inquired the father cheerfully. "Why
he spells coffee with 'kr" NO
does he? | never noticed it." "Ot
course you never did," said the son
pettishly You never notice anything
like that" perhaps not. my son." re-
piled the old man gently, but there is
one thing ! do notice, which you will
learn by and by. and that Is that Glib
son pays cash. "-Argonaut
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Mayor Seymour, of Tacoma, Wash,
is conducting a campaign to break up
what he believes to be a combination
among the Japanese gardeners to
charge exhorbitant prices for food
products. His fight is attracting
countrywide attention at time when
the entire nation is protesting against
the high cost of living,
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Millionaire Ito ragged beggar,-You
ask for aims and do not even take
your hat off. Is that the proper way
to beg? Beggar-Pardon me, sir. A
policeman is looking at us from across
the street If take my hat off he'll
arrest me for begging; as 1t is, he nat
urally takes us for old friends.-Flie
gende Batter.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
JOHANNESBURG Second
Of SERIES FROM birds"

jackson, Miss, June 24.-In game
that combined mixture of brilliant
fielding with inexcusable hobbies and
ranged all the way from swatfest to
q pitchers duel Jackson nosed out
Hattiesburg yesterday, winning to
4. With the score tied, to 4, Stovall
placed fly Just behind first in the
seventh, bringing in Wright from Sec
ond: Needles essayed to perform on
the mound for the locals but went to
pieces IN the second. when punched
hits netted the visitors their only
runs. Peters replaced Needles and
held Hattiesburg runless after the
second. The visitors filled the bases
in the third, with none down. but fail
ed to score. Poehler, c. Smith and
Stovall starred in the field.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
will be presented matinee and night.

THE State Line" sure winner at
the Lomo Theatre today. Noble act
ions done because of gratitude in the
wild days on the frontier make this
powerful story one that touches tie
universal human chord. Cupid S
Chauffeur" no laugh limit to this pic
ture. 1t sets the right pace for ioy
Gus, jolly run of 1000 feet of fun. Two
new songs by Miss Georgia Belk, cor
tralto. Another special picture The
Still Alarm. the greatest and unpar-
allied fire picture ever produced.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Summary.
Two base hits-Peohler, Eaton, {.
Smith. Stolen bases-Thornton.
First on errors-Thornton, Tutwiler,
Norcum (2); Wright. Innings pitched
BY Needles 1 1-3; by Peters Z %;
by Eaton s. Hits approximations
Needles 4; off Peters 4. Runs appor-
tioned-Off Needles 8; of Peters l.
Opponents at bat-Needles 9; Peters
30. Struck out-By Needles 1; by
Peters 6; by Eaton 5. First on balls
or Peters 1; off Eaton 2. Double
plays-Peters to Robertson to Carl
son: Smith to Cruise. Left on bases
jackson s; Hattiesburg s. Time
1:40. Umpire-Chestnut.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
F;c,d's Finishird Touch.

'N'H = 7 ''''S''F'F5 TOUOTT'
Eugene Field was once visiting the
house Of Richard Henry Stoddard In
New York During the evening a GER
tain well known physician dropped in.
he was a serious man and bit pomp-
Gus. The talk turned on diet.
Doctor" said Stoddard, I've heard
that you eat two eggs at breakfast
every morning the year round"
mo" said the doctor emphatically
mo On the contrary"
"On the contraryt' cried Stoddard.
whats the contrary Of eating two
eggs?"
Laying two eggs" came in deep,
solemn tones from Field.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
The Deepest Wells.

The deepest well in the world is in
Germany aud is G,512 feet deep The
deepest well in the United States is
near West Elizabeth. Pa. Its bottom
is 5,575 feet beneath the surface A
more remarkable well, perhaps. reach
ing a depth IF $500 feet. was drilled
for petroleum in western China by
primitive methods and by means OF
such crude ;iprlinu-es as cable made
or twisted strands of rattan
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

The Mattresses union of San Fran
cisco has voted to impose a fine on
any member who in the future does
not display her badge of membership
while on duty An attempt is also be-
ing made to have members refrain
from giving their patronage to stores
that do not employ union clerks.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Twenty-Five railroads employing
100000 men, have straight pensions,
and the United States Steel Company
with 225,000 men, has a straight out
and out system. These corporations
maintain these systems, not as chart
ties but as business propositions, be-
lieving they will be recouped by in
creased loyalty and effort on the part
of the men.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
AMERICAN LEAGUE.
Results Yesterday.

Boston Z Philadelphia 3. First
game.)
Boston 6; Philadelphia 1. (Second
game.)
Detroit a Cleveland O.
New York 3; Washington 2.
Chicago-St. Louis: wet grounds.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
Bound to Be Discovered

II man is really reliable he doesn't
have to devote much Of his time to ex.
plotting that virtue: you are watched
pretty closely whether you know 1t or
not.-Atchison Globe.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Whatever the outcome of the sea-
mems strike, it will have an unusual
Importance as an application of labor
organization to new field, for a
strike on the high seas is a rare if
not an unexampled event.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

We can understand the ease with
which fool and his money are part
ed, but what puzzles us is how the
fool got the money to part with
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Tonight the BEAUTIFUL play of Silas
Mariner with the celebrated Thanhous-
err kid, will be the feature at the Gem
Theatre. On the same program. is a
splendid comedy, with new song hits,
just from the publishers and a fine
program of music, by the Gem Orches-
ira. On Monday the great military
play, Across The Mexican Border"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

attractive show rooms for their ma
chimes. An expert machinist on auto
mobile work has Just been employed
and has reached here, while one OF
the best men on vulcanizing and rub
her work in the south will arrive the
first of the week
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
Surprises of the Week In
The Cotton States League

percentage. Yazoo City will play a
series with Greenwood, following the
Sunday game between Yazoo City and
Vicksburg.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
NATIONAL LEAGUE.
Results Yesterday.

Cincinnati 8; st. Louis I.
Philadelphia /; Boston 0.
Pittsburg 4; Chicago 3.
Brooklyn /; New York 0.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

The Standard Motor Car CO. h.
moved to large and commodiols Q12 -
tiers in the Thornton stable on Wet
Pine street, and has arranged we'll
equipped and commodious shops and
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

They are as sick that surfeit with
too much as they that starve with
Nothing. -Shakespeare.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
Games Today.

Games Today.
Cincinnati at st. Louis.
New York at Brooklyn.
Chicago at Pittsburg.
Boston at Philadelphia.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

The Central Labor Union and the
Central Federated Trades Union,
Brooklyn, N. Y, will priest against
the McNamaras arrest tomorrow
night Samuel Gompers and Mayor
Seidel of Milwaukee will speak.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Games Today.
Greenwood at Meridian.
Hattiesburg at jackson.
Yazoo City at Vicksburg.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
SOUTHERN LEAGUE.

Results Yesterday.
Birmingham 6; Memphis 5.
Nashville 7; Montgomery 1.
No others scheduled.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
:. LABOR NEWS AND NOTES.
(. :: :. :. :. !. !: :. :. . = q q = . Z

Missouri has new child labor law
effective yesterday.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
Ha%<4%><>%%%%~~
HOW THEY STAND. =
COTTON STATES LEAGUE.

Results Yesterday.
Jackson 5; Hattiesburg 4.
Yazoo City 4; Vicksburg 8.
Greenwood-Meridian; rain.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24

Prof w. w. Rivers, of Conway,
Ark who has been elected president
of the proposed Baptist College for
Women in Hattiesburg, is in the city,
and will assist in raising the neces-
sary funds to build the institution
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1911-06-24
Games TODAY.

Philadelphia at Boston.
Washington at New York.