Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1911-06-29
BEL lated
HAPPINESS

i
Engaged to Martha Tyler? Mrs.
Ward gasped when her brother an
| nounced the interesting news to her.
why, It's the most absurd thing
ever heard Of"
At this rather unusual form of con-
J graduation her brother Leonard
laughed.
ION the principle that there's no
fool like an old fool?" he inquired.
We'll, since we're in for adages, as
one might say, l prefer It's never too
late to mend And, joking aside, I'm
+, surely the luckiest fellow in the
world to have the finest and best girl
in the world saved for me all this
time. l can hardly believe it's true!
From that moment his sister al
ways said, he never had a glimmer
Of intelligence until after the we'd
ding.
The affair had developed with re-
markable suddenness while Leonard
was passing the holidays with his SIS
ter. Leonard and Martha Tyler had
known each other from childhood. So
there was more than one covert smile
and sarcastic comment when, after
going east and remaining for year
Leonard returned and, at the ripe age
Of forty-f1ve, fell desperately In love
with Martha, aged forty.
Leonard came west again a week
before the wedding-another ev1<
dencs of insanity, his sister said
The day before the wedding he and
Martha disappeared as completely alb
| If the earth had swallowed them up.
It was ten o'clock that morning be.
brother had left the house without In
forming anybody as to his Intentions.
She called up Marthas sister, with
| whom Martha had made her home.
and asked If Leonard were there. The
two had gone out together some time
before
Didn't they say anything about
getting license9" inquired Mrs..
Ward.
Martha's sister was sure that moth
Ing Of the sort had been said in her
presence. Mrs. Ward hung up the
telephone receiver and then gave her
self up to the hopeless process of try
ing to convince herself that James
couldn't have been such an idiot az
to forget the marriage license.
At eleven o'clock that night Leon
ard wandered in. happy and without
the license. To do him Justice. he
was quite as much disturbed as the
most exacting sister could have
wished when he was told that there
| would be barely time in the morning
for them to go down and get it and
return for the ceremony
He rose bright and early the next
morning and seemed SO alive to the
seriousness of the occasion that his
sister allowed him to leave the house
| without any misgivings as to what he
| might do while away However, al
time passed and he did not return.
her serenity deserted her. She i'd
geted uncomfortably for Is minutes
or so, then called up Martha's home.
She was informed by the maid who
| answered the telephone that Leon
ard had just left the house. A subse-
Quent short interview with Martha's
sister revealed the fact that Martha
| and Leonard only few moments be-
fore, when both their toilets should
have been we'll on the way to COM
| pletion, had been found reading po-
etry in the library.
HE certainly is crazy" said Leon
ards sister, almost In tone Of awe.
Not a bit more crazy than she is,"
said Marthas sister
Fifteen minutes after Leonard had
returned home and then had dlsap-
| peared into his own room, with strict
instructions from his sister not to do
any more foolish things until after he
was married, Mrs. Ward heard a
meek voice calling from the hall.
Carrie" the voice was saying. ~
wonder if you could help me-"
Mrs. Ward went to the door Of her
room and looked out. In the hall.
looking thinner and more forlorn
than she had any idea he could look.
| held q small jar about half full Of
some sort of yellowish, greasy con-
coction in the other an uncomfort-
able looking towel. With the towel
he now and then gave futile dabs at
HIS face. down which was sliding In
| slippery streams the other half of the
contents of the jar, mingled with slip
perry brooklets of soapy water
What is it?" he asked forlornly.
81 thought tit was a shampoo. but
| 1t seems so queer
Mrs Ward snatched the jar out of
his hand. why. you great idiot"
she said, with more force than po-
likeness. "it's goosegrease! It's ap-
propriate enough. I'm sure"
| For minute she gave herself I'D
to the joy of contemplating him Then
she took him firmly by the arm and
| led him back to the bathroom, where
| she soaped him and stood him on his
head in the washbowl and rinsed him
and then began the process all over