davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
The Biffest One Yet.

A minister noticed a crowd OF
urchins clustered around a dog OF
doubtful pedigree.
What are you doing. my little
men? ne asked with fatherly inter-
est.
Swappin' lies, volunteered one
the boys. " The feller that tells the
biggest one gets the purp."
" Shocking!" exclaimed the minis
ter. " Why, when ! was your age
| never even thought of telling an
untruth."
Youse win, chorused the ur-
chins. 1.-The dogs yours, mister"
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

CHIyALRoUs Spain proposes to send
over two new cruisers to salute the Amer
ican flag and by this graceful courtesy
wipe out old memories. By way OF
reciprocal amends, how would it do to
persuade Spain to take back the Philip
pines ?-EI.
Time was when this country got
even with Spain by few love-taps
at Manila and Santiago. And it was
done so well that the memory will
never perish. The salute to the flag
is but a continuation of the good feel
ing inspired by profound respect.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
Wedding Anniversaries.

First-Cotton.
Second-Paper
Third Leather.
Fourth-truit and Flowers.
Fifth-Wooden.
Sixth-Sugar.
Seventh-Woolen.
Eighth-India Rubber.
Ninth-Willow.
Tenth-Tin.
Eleventh-Steel.
Tweifth-Silk and Fine Linen.
Thirteenth-lvory.
Fifteenth-Crystal.
Twentieth-China.
Twenty-Fi -Fitth-Silver.
Thirtieth-Pearl.
Fortieth-Ruby.
Fiftieth-Golden.
Seventy-Fifth-Diamond.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
Enouuh 70 Know.

Some pilgrims pass their hours in dull re-
pining.
The clouds are all they ever try to see
I only know the sun is often shining,
And that's enough for ms.
Some pilgrims wall: THE road Is steep
and dreary!
The thorns are thick where roses fair
should be!''
I only know there's rest for all aweary.
And that's enough for me-
Some pilgrims moan: ''The way u vague
to heaven.
And death ends ALL The grave our goal
must be!''
only know . promise has been given.
And that's enough for me.
WALT Mason.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

"A rose by any other name would smell
as sweetr'
Cried Romeo once. and truth he spoke,
! own.
And We should smell the autos down the
street
Though gasoline were labeled French
cologne.
Detroit Free Press.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

on. That paper forgot to mention
the cost of the plant w. r. Hearst
will establish in Seattle-that of an
up to-date, ali the worlds news
morning newspaper.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

They keep on concocting eilxirs to make
Father Time disappear.
To keep US from going to heaven II We
chance to prefer It down here:
They keep on discovering serums that
shall obviate death and decay.
But the hearses are still being needed for
use In the old fashioned way.
Good luck to the glorious doctors. and
may they continue to wage
Their wars against wasting diseases till
youth shall return to old age!
They keep on concoctIng eiIxirs. they tie
Father Time to a stake.
But they can't somehow get undertakers
educated to not undertake.
Chicago Record Herald.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

"Could you do something for a poor
old sailorY' asked the seedy looking
wanderer at the gate.
"Poor old sailor?" echoed the lady at
work at the tub.
"Yes's: l follered the water for six.
teen years"
"Well." said the woman after a crit.
ical look. you certainly don't look as
II you ever caught up with It"
Then she resumed her labors.-Ideas
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

why did you decide to cut OF your
cue?"
ut struck me as absurd" replied the
enlightened oriental.
"In appearance?"
"No; in the way 1t Is spelled -
Washington Herald
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

Bangs Is liar. there's no
gainsayIng that
"osg-1'here's no gaInsaying 1t to
Bangs. l tried 1t once and it cost ne
$40 for repairs.-BOstOn Transcript
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

"What Is the greatest get-rich-quick
scheme you know off, asked the fimsy
dnancier of his partner.
taking money away from other peo-
pie who want to get rich quick
Washington Star.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

"Our new boOkkeeper seems to have
q wonderful grasp Of detail"
That's right" declared the junior
partner. HE knows the records Of
most all the ball players. Washing
ton Herald.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

THE man who is in doubt is the
man with another mans collar on
his neck.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

How wonderful the power Of love.
For the world all loves a lover.
But greater Is tho power of shove,
For the world all shoves . shower.
-puck
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
Needed the Rest.

What have you got against the
minister"
His sermons are too short"
That is an uncommon complaint
these days"
But he finishes before my nap is
half over
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

"Jack Blunt told Miss FRAGILE point
blank that she powdered"
"What did she sayr
"She simply exploded" - Boston
Transcript.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

You may break. you may shatter.
The trust II you will.
But the scent Of the grating
Will hang round 1t still.
-I.ifA
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
How to Can Greens.

Cook just as you would for the
table, sailing them and not cooking
too tender. Put into glass jars,
pouring the juice off. When can is
full have some good vinegar boiling
hot. Pour this into can. Be sure it
fills every crevice, putting knife in
around the can. One-half teacupful
is enough for one-half gallon. if vine
gar is good. Will keep for two years.
Is good cold or warmed over. This
is u good winter relish when every
thing is dry. Try it. Autumn greens
are good to can.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

WHEN we can't tell what is COM
ing to us, how can we know whether
to grab Or dodge?
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
GEO. G. ISRAEL
Attorney at Law
Chile Con Carne and Clam Chowder
Oh BYMPIA, WASH
Office: Funk Volland Building

Served daily at Theodore Werien's
lunch counter in the rear of Charles
Saloon. Cali in and get a bowl.
Coffee and doughnuts till Q A. N.
Merchants hrLch at noon. Teddy"
always greets the hungry with a
Smile.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

Patience-And you say she left your
college?
Patricc-Oh. yes. You know she was
tongue tied. and she could never hope
to use our college yell. - Y0nkers
Statesman.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

A big green fly he lit Just right,
AS II he'd come TO stay
] swatted him with all my might
And broke window pane. woke the
baby. upset a potted geranium and
tore a lace curtain. But that was
not the worst OF It
The blamed fly got away!
Chicago Tribune.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

De ship what's gwine ter take you
Through life IL bout ter sail,
But don't you be . Jonah
Ter be eat up by Z whalei
Be des what you wants ter.
Don't let yo' courage fail.
But don't you be q Jonah
Ter be eat up by = whale!
Atlanta Constitution
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

A WOMAN can forgive the man she
refused for getting rich, but not for
getting her name
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

II called q prizefghtcr q liar to-
day"
Gee whiz! What did he DOR
II don't know: hung up the re-
ceiver."-Toledo Blade.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

The chronic kicker, when he has
A good excuse for scowling.
Gets little sympathy because
We know he's always growing.
But when tho cheerful man gets sore
And kicks-sometimes he'll do it
Folks listen unto him and say,
'There must be something to IT,"
Detroit Free Press.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

Although some wild professor whose as-
surance isn't small
Says poverty will very soon be crowded
to the wall.
Keep up your humble toiling In the good
old faithful way.
You'd starvs to death q million times
while waiting for the day!
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

They charge me more and more for shoes.
they charge me more for meat
They charge me more for everything
have to wear and eat
They're adding to the rent I pay, but
refuse to fret.
Thank heaven. they have not increased
my alimony yet.
They're trying to increase the rates No
matter where I turn
Some schemer bobs up with a plan to cap
ture what | earn.
Day after day they find new ways to keep
mo plunged in debt.
Thank heaven. they have not Increased
my alimony yet,
Chicago Record Herald.
"Why do you like to pass the collec-
ti0n basket at church?''
ut looks better than to have the COL
lection basket pass me. Toledo Blade.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
Creamed Oysters.

Let two quarts Of milk come to a
boil. Take three pints of oysters,
drain off the liquor, put in chopping
bowl and chop fine. Stir two small
tablespoon fuls of -four in four OF melt
ed butter. Put the oysters in the
boiling milk, stir in the butter and
-four, season with pepper and salt,
let boil up once and serve.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

The P.-I. in a recent issue con-
tains an editorial headed: " A State
That Goes Ahead" in which it tells
of Ellensburg erecting woolen mill
to cost 100000; Everett building a
new salmon cannery to cost $40, 900;
Sumas to have a new bank, and so
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06
HOME HELPS.

The water in which a leg of mutton
has been boiled is an excellent basis
for onion soup.
Do not leave meat wrapped in pa
per; not only will the meat be apt to
taste of the paper. but the paper will
also absorb the juice OF the meat.
Broken eggs or the yolks will re-
main fresh several days if covered
with cold water and kept in the re-
frigerator or some other cool place.
If fresh water fish is soaked in
strong salt water after it is cleaned,
and then dried, it will be tastier
when cooked.
Try making your French dressing
in bowl in which there is piece or
two of ice. Keeping the ingredients
very cold insures q thick, rich, we'll
blended dressing.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

you know old Jollaby7 Well. he
has locomotor ataxia." "IIe has7 I
thought all the time 1t was q limou-
sine"-Baltimore American.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1911-10-06

scant Il tho aid mere decoration shows
Tho thoughts that flourish meath q last
years straw
Are often as significant as those
Rooted by . forty dollar panama.
-Washington Star.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
RUSSIAN ORCHESTRA.

4 musical event of interest for the
week will be the appearance in the
Gennett theater. Friday vening, Marcn
the Seventeenth of the Russian Sym
phony orchestra. The patron and
patronesses list which was published
Sunday contains the names of num-
Der of the prominent people of the
city. The orchestra has appeared in
this city before. Walter Anthony in
writing for the San Francisco Call
says:
This will be no criticism. AS a
hungry man devours a meal or thirs-
ty man drains a dipper so we sat at
the Garrick theater yesterday after
noon and Toasted and drank of music.
Mscha Elman alone is worth cram
med house of hearers who have two
ears each and spine, for he plays
the violin as only an immortal, touch
ed by genius. can do. Backing the
Muscovite fiddler yesterday was the
Russian Symphony orchestra. directed
by Modest Altschuler.
The playing of Altschuler's Orches-
ira demonstrated the fact that from
Russia is coming the best of present
day music. His program was exclu-
sively Russian. The musicians, COM
prising the organization, have been
identified for several years with moth
ing but the ears music, which it has
presented in New York. No wonder.
then. that Tschaikowsky' "Slav
March" was played with solemnty and
bigness or that the March of the Sa-
dar." which closed the program, was
big with meaning and suggestive of
the mystery and greatness of the race
which is just waking up politically
and which is i'm the very morning of
it's musical consciousness.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
ST. pATRJCk'S DAY.

What blessing that st. Patrick S
day comes during the Lenten season
and thus one can take day off and
arrange for the charming party for this
day. The shops are showing SO many
pretty novelties. In a window at one
Of the local shops Is miniature table
beautifully appointed, appropriate to
the day. The name cards and fav-
Ors are very pretty, as well as the
other embellishments. The hostess
who selects this day for entertainment
will surely have number of attract
I've gifts To select from. The Flower
Shop can be depended upon to arrange
for beautiful table decorations and as
the green is good, a number OF pretty
cry. Floral adorments are always i'm
portant at a dinner and adds much to
the success OF an affair OF this kind.
Among the novelties for st. Pat
rick's day favors are shown green pa
per caps: fans cunningly decorated
notices in which are tissue paper
caps which can be removed without
spelling the rose: pretty little green
paper candy holders; n shamrock car
with verse. In the napery line there
are tissue paper table sets decorated
with shamrocks
II is a comparatively easy matter to
carry out the menu in ST. Patrick day
effects. The caterer will supply new
ideas for ices. cakes and CONNECTIONS
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
MARRIAGE ANNOUNCED.

At dinner party given yesterday al
the home of Mr.. and Mrs. Webster Par
ry. 2t0 North Ninth street, the mar
riage of Mr.. Maurice White and Miss
Katherine Gift was announced. The
announcement was "a complete sur
prise. The wedding was celebrated
one year ago yesterday, March the
twelfth. nineteen hundred and ten at
135 Greenup street. Coyington, Ken
lucky. The Rev. Carlyle performed
the ceremony. The bride has estab-
lished a precedent for women, as
IL has always been understood that
women are unable TO keep secret
and so the bride should be doubly con
graduated.
The dinner table was beautifully dec
grated with flowers and ferns. The
colors. pink and white, with the fern
cry added to the attractiveness of the
table appointments. Dinner in five
courses was served. The guests includ
ed the members of the Gift and White
families with few intimate friends
OF the young people. Mr.. White is well
known in business circles as he is en-
ployed in the department of engineers
OF the Pennsylvania railroad. The
bride IL well known in business, so
Cial and musical circles of the city and
Is a most charming and accomplished
young woman. Their many friends will
he glad To extend congratulations.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
FADS AND FASHIONS

Some of the new silks are wonder
full and the border designs are exceed
ingly rich and beautiful. The colors
are weirdly unlike the ordinary, ia
miliar reds, blues browns and green's.
but as ribbons and trimmings designed
to match them by the kind forethought
OF the manufacturers, nobody will be
put to any trouble. The pinks have a
luscious, fruity suggestion. inclining to
purple. The puppies, on the contrary,
incline to blue the 0lues to crap. The
brown shades are most wonderful of
all. and range from palest biscuit and
corn to a rich nut brown. Green is a
particularly chic color. but it is too
strong for full costume and its use
will be confined chiefly TO trimmings
and to hats
Broad toques of dark blue etamine
straw, infinitely dotted with white,
gracefully draped and finished with a
full white or dark blue aigrette, are
among the up-to-date millinery novel
ties. Soft. supple straws woven TO inn
itate knitted wool. either plain or more
often striped, are extremely popular.
Straw nowadays is as supple as silk or
mousseline, and curiously soft can
vas straw is folded. plated or draped
as easily and as gracefully as a silk
handkerchief. These supple straws, in
lizard green. cerise, crimson and dark
/ III hoo Il
in raiah or Indian style. the small
point above the brow ornamented and
inset with a triangular piece of orient
al or wildly colored embroidery picked
out with gold and silver threads
Cherry -colored velvet. cherry colored
wings and cherry colored feathers. en-
ployed with all black or black and
white striped hats. are feature in the
novel headgear inasmuch as the pref
~ tint conveys an impression of
warmth upon a cold day that white
feathers and aigrettes certainly do not
impart.
Black and white striped straw is one
i of the novelties for early spring. the
stripes being an inch or so wide and
of coarse braid. Red is the favorite
color for trimming these. and it is
used in bands. rolls, knots and chouX.
All these hats are toque shaped, the
straw being wound and draped, al
ways. however, keeping the lines of the
stripes.
Fur, used as it has been on the win
ter hats in wide encircling bands, has
been found so becoming that women
are loath to part with it and it is
quite probable that fur will continue
to be used to some extent on hats for
early spring wear
Steel-studded hair ornaments are
much affected this winter by both old
and young women. They are particu-
larry effective in dark or in gray hair.
Florence Fairbanks.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
WHAT CLEAN BLOOD MEANS

They used to accuse Or. A. B. Simp-
son, one of the famous physicians Of
Indiana, of having Il cure-all because
his great reputation was established
largely on one prescription, the most
effective Alternative or blood purifier
known.
No" he would remark. 1T will not
cure consumption. nor typhoid. nor
any one of a hundred common dis
eases. 1t simply purifies the blood.
but it does that very thoroughly"
What are the symptoms of poisoned
impure blood? They range all the way
from the dreadful syphilis to muddy
complexion. They include inflamma-
tory rheumatism. catarrh. scrofula, &C.
zema, erysipelas. pimples, boils. run
ming sores, erysipelas. pimples.
boils, and number of simi-
lar Affections. All these yielded
readily to DIR. Simpsons treatment
And during the forty years this prep
aration has been on the market as DR.
A. f. simpsons Vegetable Compound
II has never failed in a single case
The very worst cases of syphilis have
been cured as well as all the other
same compound has always given
clear, clean compilations to those. 9TH
erwise In good health
1t is sold at s1.00 bottle at all drug
stores ...
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
ENTERTAINED FRIENDS.

On Saturday afternoon Miss Frances
Mayhem entertained number of her
friends at her home in North Goth
street, in honor of her eighth birth
day anniversary. A very pleasant time
was spent in games. prizes. prizes be-
ing awarded to Miss Lucille Jones and
Miss Lorraine Long. A dainty two
course luncheon was served. The lit
tie guests were: Miss Lucille Jones,
Miss Alice Van Etten, Miss Martha
Handley. Miss Marian Handley. Miss
Martha Plummer, Miss Florence Viii
son, Miss Florence Strauss, ISIS Helen
Massey. Miss Lorraine Long. Miss Ruth
Grove. Miss Gabrielle Fisher, Miss
Frances Mayhem
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
Queer Coronation Gifts.

One of the most extraordinary gifts
made on the coronation day of Edward
/. was that of 800 horses which had
been used by the royal princes and
other persOnages in the procession to
Westminster abbey. These horses, all
richly caparisoned and harnessed just
as they We're, We're let loose into the
very midst of the mob after the ban
quet in Westminster hall that always
succeeded a coronation in those days
The people in the streets were permit
ted to catch the animals, and to him
who caught a horse it and it's appoint
ments belonged.-Iondon Chronicle.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
DANCE AT INDIANAPOLIS

The members of the butler college
chapter of Kappa Alpha Theta save
their term dance last night at the
Woodruff Place clubhouse. The fra
ternity colors were carried out in the
decorations and the various appoint
ments. The windows were draped
with Southern smlaN. which hung
from lattice of green. and the Win
dow boxes were filled with yellow
tulips and jonquils. The stage repre-
scented a garden scene the background
being massed with palms and ferns.
Spring flowers formed the borders.
The guests from out of town were the
Misses Louise MauZy and Louise
Craig from Indiana university, Ruth
Moffett OF Bloomfield. Edith Wilk of
Nashville Fern Brendell of lions
vile, RoXanna Thayer of Greenfield,
Messrs. Luther Eldridge, Harry Reed,
and Herbert Mosher of Lafayette. and
Archibald Reynolds OF Indiana univer-
sity. The patronesses were Mrs.
Charles Eichrodt. Mrs. Cora Barnett,
Mr.. and Mrs. Carl Milan and Prof. and
Mrs. Charles Embody.-lndianapo
Star.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13

must poke these days or be consider
ed poky. We are leaving bridge to the
bourgeoise widow who ever comes To
Washington-city of bluffs, so poker
is its logical pastime.
It's all King Georges doing. So
cially we are Tories still, and it's FOL
low my leader" even across the wa
ter. King George set down his nice
big. virtuous foot kerplunk. with a
stern mo more bridge on Sundays my
lords and ladies'" You know his pa
pa used frequently 10 command
bridge on the Sabbath day at house
parties, where he was it. But George
is a different kind of a boy-entire-
ly. George reserves the Decalogue
and is bored with bridge. So bridge
has received a black eye, and since
one has to be entertained-on week
days, anyhow-there nothing left but
poker and few innocent things like
that.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
MILLINERY DISPLAYS.

Despite the fact that number of
persons are observing the Lenten sea-
son, the chief diversion seems to be
inspecting the new millinery. The
streets these sunshiny days are crowd
ed with women who are eager to see
the latest creations. Already several
hats have been seen on the streets.
The new creations are so beautiful
and lovely that femininity finds it a
little hard to wait until the openings
which will probably be held the latter
part of the month. A number of per
sons will save their new bonnets and
appear in them on Easter day. 1t has
been predicted that choosing a hat
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-03-13
PLEASANT SURPRISE.

Mrs. Walter A. Johnson Sunday in
honor of her birthday. The affair be-
ing an indoor picnic those who came
brought well filled baskets. The guests
We're Mr.. and Mrs. Henry w. Deuker,
Mr.. and Mrs. William Whitcare, Mr..
and Mrs. Ross Osborne, Mr.. and Mrs.
William S. Johnson, Mr.. and Mrs. Wal
ter A. Johnson. Miss Toy Osborn. Miss
Mildred Osborn. Mrs. Sarah Railsback
Mr.. Benjamin Deuker, Mr.. Harry Deu-
ker. Mr. Edward Lancaster, Master
Rolin Johnson, Master Robert Osborn,
Master Frank Osborn. Master Roy Os.
born, Master Robert Johnson, Master
Walter Johnson, Jr.