Omaha daily bee., 1911-03-02

Geniality that smiles and shines above al
kinds OF common troubles il supposed TO b,
the exclusive and happy asset Of the IA
man. II is one Of the compensations for
Weighty responsibilities. the strain on sho,
leather and solace for rude remarks at.
tracted by a big front But a fat worm
turns occasionally. one Of copious dimen,
sions summed himself in front OF a store
window i'm New York and threw such a
mighty shadow over the interior that the
storekeepel ordered him to move on. He
| refused TO bulge. y lively argument fol-
| lowed attracting a crowd which fell into
the humor Of the situation. An appeal "a
a policeman lifted the blockade and shifted
the heavyweight and his shadow to the ad.
joining cigar store The store relieved
measures two feet six inches In width. and
SO well is space economical that the pro-
! prietor goes outside to turn around Prob
ably the fear Of bad taste or the cop
prevented the fat man from eating up the
| lean one
The passing of one Of the worst pests
from which New York has ever suffered
| and one that has been a matter of great
] interest to visitors seems to be near at
| hand. II Is the theater ticket Spectator,
that heavy browed Individual that infests
the sidewalk in front Of every New York
theater and all but commits actual assault
in case his offers are refused.
! BY unanimous vote the Board Of Alder
men has passed an ordinance preventing
the sale Of tickets in the streets and on
the sidewalks and prohibiting the adver-
usement Of such business. The specu-
lators still have three weeks to ply their
l hn1
| effective within thirty days. Needless to
say the spectators are trying to devise
some way in which to circumvent the or
dinance. but up to date no scheme Of eva
sion has been found
II was at first suggested that the specu-
lators take out peddlers' licenses and sell
chewing gum or some such commodity
with theater tickets thrown in. This
scheme, however was abandoned. on the
ground that X would have been too appar-
ent an evasion OF the law. II is probable
that the spectators will test the constitu-
tionality OF the law, the old ordinance hav-
ing been found unconstitutional. The new
ordinance is believed to meet the defects
found In the old measure and New Workers
are harboring visions of at least being rid
Of the most obnoxious phase of theater-
going in the metropolis.
Since 1t has been decided to establish
municipal baths for the million at Coney
Island, other and even more ambitious
plans for its Improvement have been
formulated These include a continuous
walk and drive along the entire Give
miles Of its water front and a new
bulkhead line which has been author
lied by government engineers. con-
tract has been let for a rip-rap wall
forty feet thick at it's base and twenty
feet at the top. suTmOunted by concrete
walk. This viii protect the island from
those periodic invasions by the Atlantic
which have frequently been quite destruc-
tive. All of which is expected to attract
higher average OF patronage than tine
resort has hitherto enjoyed.
Mrs. Frederick Hartwig, bride. living
at $40 Ogden avenue, notified the High
bridge police station that her diamond en-
gagement ring, valued at $145. had disap-
peared while she was making change for
the chauffeur Of delivery wagon. Police
men Buddemeyer and O'Mara were sent
around to investigate She told them that
the man had delivered several packages to
her In the kitchen. She went into another
room to get her pocketbook to pay him
After he had gone she missed the ring
She described the driver and the detec-
tives went to the stables of department
store at Park avenue and One Hundred
Eighty-third street There they scrutinzed
all the employees and finally picked out
John ]. Kelly, a chauffeur. He was
searched, but no trace Of the ring could
be found.
Wrong man, l guess" said OMara,
and the chauffeur began to put on his
clothes. So pronounced was Rellys relief
that he began whistling a popular air as
he adjusted his tie.
II know that tune" said Buddemeyer.
Its something about bells on his fingers
and rings on his toes. Do you suppose he
means anything by it?"
Lets see" said O'Mara Then he turned
to Kelly" Take off your socks" he said.
Kelly's face fell, but he pulled off the
hosiery. The policemen say they found the
missing ring encircling the little toe on the
left foot.
Assemblyman James A. Hendrickson of
Red Bank N. j., with a keen eye to the |
future, has come to the rescue OF the
lobster family with bill that will prevent
the taking or selling of Holsters under
nine inches in length. This will give the
Holsters that are now ruthlessly taken
from the bosoms Of their families a few
more years In which TO wax fat and sweet
for the palates OF the Broadway diners
The penalty provided is a fine OF from
s25 to $50 Hendrickson argues that the
bill will rebound TO the advantage OF the