davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

~ ROBaB BLG if any ever asked YOU why yon
YOU set him down for fool immediately, ana
perhaps YOU edged away from him for fear that
lie might become violent 1t does sound ld'otlc TO
ask why he laughs But If you ever di'i answer
the question the chances are nncto one thai You sSla
YOU laughed because what happened was funny
OF course, knew YOU begging the ques=
ton. BIT that is about the only reason any OF US
could find on the spur of the moment And 1T a thing
is funny that certainly is sufficient cause FOR laugh
ing at it. just stop moment AMI ask yoursef why
thing is funny and you will begin to see that the
who asked YOU why you laugh WAS not such a
fool as YOU thought. Ii is safe bel that YOU can
the question: and in the end You Will be
obliged to take refuge in that conclusive feminine
that it is funny Just because If is.
There is man, however, out Of the billion anu
half inhabitants of the earth who has succeeded IN
answering the question He has aualvzed the subject
Of laughter anI found the for all its forms,
from fitting smile 10 our most immodcratc cachnna
tious. This discerning man Is NJ. llcnfl bergSon, a
professor of the College de France in Paris lie en-
bodied his views and his researches in series of three
articles which published in the Revue de Paris,
authorized translation of which has recently been
ssueI by the Macmillan company of New York. NJ
Bereson knows how to create sensation, lie has
lust been stirring up great furore in England with
his book on ''Tmc and Free VIII and his lecture at
Oxford about the soul. His explanation of laughter is
scarcely less sensational.
Man has been defined "an animal which
laughs. aud II safely nc SAID that every human
being likes to laugh and the more lie laugh the
better he enjoys himself. In other words he feels
sorry time be finds that he has missed oPpor
tiIpty for good laugh, This is the sad part abont
NJ Bergson S book Once have read IT YOU realize
that your ignorance of WHY YOU laughed has debarrcd
YOU from a great deal Of amusement. The very
fact that laugh is uproariously funny NJ, Berg
son book shows Just what ridiculous fool You
are for laughing at the things YOU do, 1t provides
YOU with the facilities for getting two laughs where
formerly you oulv got You laugh at the funny
thing that happens then YOU laugh Yourself for
laughing at ii.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

M GRrLE-Bella, yeh yuhself out by oviu
LVA yer entire soul TO Yer work, which 1t tells on
any III the end. In | suffer from the
evil effects of allowin' art 10 dominate me. an ,
nights after the show when 'vc thruwcl my self
wholly inta my line. ''Yuh should the gcs on
old Broadway. Yer majesty. an did my TWO dances
! ain { able TO become normal again till We had
coupa shots Of Kentucky disturbance. Not that APP
prove of lady plnyn that stun in public but took
medicine ii S different. an | amt the sort 60
ever let it git boll kin take 1t or leave
IT alone. an aus could,
Anuabelle-An' so kip-hco. Msta George
Baldwin of Valdez les that frena Gif Pinchot s
aim hef Hold the wire. Jest a seckind Whadda
yuh want George Iur' None of my busncssi A
vuh be right. but ef it s lunch in the Red
Room they one waitin' there an another Jest
wor1 she II order an fur him to speed along an with
heart beatin fur the private of my mere
lv--hello | must he rcfcrrn TO different gclmunl
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10
Professor Henri Bergson, of the
College de France, Explains Its
Causes; Also Advises How to Culti-
uate Two Laughs
Where But One
Came Before.

long to the parish He thinking mechanically
His mind was rigid Ho Just like the absent
minded man He had q SET idea i'm his head aud moth
ing could move him from it, Thus NJ. Bergson traces
all laughter to the same Every funny crcum
stance, while il may he due directly TO different
reasons is based on the same fundamental prluclple
Consequently dealing with other forms of humor
will NOT be necessary to trace them all back to the
fundamental principle. Once YOU know the direct
cause of tho laugh easy to sec ITS relation TO the
basic cause of over. .rigiditv Of habit.
NJ Bercsou has embodied his theory in one SEN
tencc '|The attitude gestures and movements OF the
human bolv arc aughabc in proportion as that
body reminds OF a mere machine In other words,
we laugh the interference of matter with tc or at
the body impeding the movement of tho soul: as for
example when speaker Is obliged 10 stop and sncczo
in the middle Of eloquent passage.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

Scene-The telephone switchboard in the lobby of a
Broadway hotel.
Characters-Anuabelle. the telephone girl and
Myrtle ''in the business
A NNABELLk-Lsten, leare. Kin yuh gimme
~ the loan of FIVE bucks9 The pianner agent
n due tomorrow, an ef / kmnot dig up the
rent it II be took out, an yuuuo the talk
what II begin. 4 course fur I kin endure any
thing but left hysterical Jest at the deer Of
it. luh II cit it back Sat dy.
Myrtle--Bclla IN clean as bug. Three weeks
salary an the eighty | got fur sein the neellct
Jimmy sent me-I had two already an CELLS gotta
live; besides, / ain t speaku TO him more any
way, An ef | yuh gotta right to sell Yer
prop W But the deer is what Jone with the change,
which | yuh think M stngy, but how kin when
| ain got it, dearie!
1t s miuin stocks, an cf ever ! incline my she'll
like ear to the sweet murmurin' song Of a guy who
kin me in copper proposition where they
only got steamer freight to the smelter, an they
be shippiu' soon S they kin induce the boats
to come in an empty the buukcrs-the tunnel cx-
tcndin' seven miles acrost a ledge pure an rich
that the diamond lrillers breaks into uncomfortable
wecpn when they must 90 off shift an they gotta
have guards to stop the Guggenheims from surgin in
an pcrs nav grabbin' shovel 80 5 to help out
he said it all that. an cf doubted l could asst
Steve Birch
Oh. why why is the male animal gave leave 10
the earth, handn us pore workin' gels dreams!
j myself pitchered the actress queen of the
copper country. opuent that ! could line alone
every cyenn' an cut all the guys what i gotta be
polite 10 not git attention, an then they
pnched the promoter fur illegally usin the mails an
| haJda sign fur the road tour at twenty week an
room with chorus ladies what il 5 honest fact |
bccha ain Il got n di mond TO their name! Ain life
fierce, deare'
Annabelle-lts hor bic. Lookit me. settin' here
forlorn when IN lonein' to haste ia the wild, tree
praries where sun an hearts are kind. a course
- SIM oPccu Eocn slim cfnf limo
of eas about how this here IS the burg an the
rest ringers otherwise yuh knock yuhself but gun
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

VIZ HEN see fall down III the street
w we laugh Why' NJ. Bergsou says IT Is
simply because amused AT. his mechanical
nelasticity." II the had suddenly bceu seized
With the whim 10 sit down probably would not
have laughed at BIN. II not his sudden change or
attitude that creates the laugh, but the involuntary
element in this change His mind has not adapted IT.
self quickly enough to the fact that there stone
in the path that the ground was slippery. And
absent mindcluess oyerrigiditv of habit The
cIiapces it would have occurred 10 any OF
that this is the of laughter, But NJ. Berg
succeeds in proving his statement by series OF
amusing anecdotes and incidents the humor of which
arises from the source.
Carving his idea of a falling down. he
DOUBTLESS fall is always fall but it is
thing TO tumble into we'll because YOU were looking
anywhere but in front OF YOU; is quite another 10
fall into it because YOU intent upon star. -
Such is ridiculous because of tho jolt his
mantle occupation received when he encountered
a prosaic thing a we'll. II is the contrast which
makes us laugh. And vet these whimsical wild
reasouab BILE. excite TO laughter BY playing the
same chords within ourselves, by setting in motion tho
same inner mechanism, does the victim of a prac.
,ca Joke or the passer-by who slips down in the
street.
1t is the same way with the man who did weep
at a funeral sermon which deeply moved every one
else and who gave tho reason that lie did be-
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

A NNABELLE-Pers nay, kin where they
could be many changes made on this here I'm"
happy sphere, but they ain t goin TO come on the
safe play TO set tight don I 20 in till yum
got sunDn' ! been fccln better steady ever sluce
/ met with Chaw-lie. head barkeep, fur, he
saws, leave the worl go fur what II it 40 fur yuh!
lie the grandesf fcla, dearle. course to
strangers tryn to in he's dretful cold an re-
served. an bein' exclusive an drinkin' only grape
cf he s asst, they gotta respect him. | think gel
oGghta have dignity fur these here Jocs who s
allus glad-handin summon wearies me. Chawle says
-hcol
Hello Who? Oh, is that yuh, liazeli (She S tho
big blonde at Hcgan = dearc; not bad lookn when
she S made up fresh an aus pcddIn n rap against
her best freDs but she S good fela at that) Say
Hazel are vuh goin to the roller rink like yuh saiif
Well listen Bout 10 clock yuh crack about supper
an lea We us 90 to Churchill cause IT IS been brang
10 me that Able S gon there evcDin IS with party
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

clare HI cites many instances of this kinl
bumor from Molicrc s plays; for example. the az,
SaguarclIc gave Gcronte when inc Iattcr remai
that thc heart was the left side and the lriI
the right: "Ycs, it was so formerly, bnt we 4
altered all that: We practice medicine in q
a new way
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10
Johnson's Joke.

was talking TO lack johnson at Iinsal Ihv to'
bar in London about the authorities refussr,
him fight Wells' said a sporting editor OF - he
'Jack blamed it all on Bishop Meyer, e., ." The q
the advertising divine who managed 10 s.uppr tl0o
He WASH t nj all angry with Bishop Nef''
In fact, he cracked Il Joke about him .,. b
Flashing his golden smile upon me "'u'N RI
glass of stout lack said: ~ IresdtI
'''I can I blame Bishop Meyer. Hc !. sven d
opposed to fighting, you know. lie won
Punch. - b.
The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1911-12-10

Scene-The telephone switchboard in the lobby of a
Broadway hotel
Characters-Annabee. the telephone girl. and
Myrtle ''n the business -
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
MORE FREIGHT
 THAN EVER

Not for the past eight years has there been 90 much freight to take from this place to the foot of lake Tabargp as this spring and never has tH Ice on the lake been SO thin at fh season of the year-not to sz- urrd eighteen inches This roudL Hor Is due lo Che fact that the snow 'aH early last all and before there had been any severe freezing weather
 The condition of Che fec means that It win be necessary Co rush the -.iEhtiuE business. as the lake will doubtless break up at least 10 days earlier than usual -Whitehorse star.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
GOES
 S0CIBLISTlC
By Alaska Nsws BureauJ

BUTTE. Mont. April i-The so- CaIist party today swept the city. e'ectiug the Reverend Duncan. an unitarian minister as mayor. and al s- electiug the city treasurer, all the FcTce judges and five out of nine a1uucilmen
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
CHAMP CLARK
 E SPEAKER
Rr Alasks News Rureaal

WASHINGTON. n C.. April 4- with the galleries of -he House hu- "a Go ovs-flowtus. Congress opened -.tay Champ Clark was elected Speaker setting GI7 out Of 265, Rep rsseruuva Mann. Of Illinois. recejv- ad Ial votes. and sixteen progressive R,pubEeaus voted for Representative Cooper oI Wisconsin.
 T- his opening speech. Clark said us. the democrats would revise he .,rtH downward. demand fair house rules and admit Arizona and New Mexico Co statehood
 William Jennings Bryan appeared a- a spectator and was greeted with cheers
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
YALE CANCELS
 'MIDOIE" RACE

ANNAPOLIS. Nd. April 4-Yals has notified the naval academy that a. r-ev win ne sent Co Annapolis t.ts yasr The reason given it that f fs almost certain .hat Yale vill en- f.ra t-.arer'ar race with Cornell and Princeton some time before Che Harvard race at New London !, Is .rrhaHr. That Syracuse win send a row tr Annapolis May zH.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
BECKER TRUE
 II HE NORTH

The Bellingham Herald of Feb ruary fifth contains an article and a picture of our fellow townsman. R. M. C. Becker. in which a history Of the travels of Mr. Becker. and anec- does of his younger days are given. Mir. Becker states In the interview. the same sentiments which he ex- pressed to this paper when he re- turned. that there is no place Ike Alaska"
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
GAS STOW:
 CAUSES FIRE
CBy Alaska News Bureaul

COLUMBUS. Miss. April IA g7s stove left burning In the drug store O. Dr. J. n. Turner Hndled a blaze a Fayette. Ala. % miles east Of here. which destroyed l2 buildings, practically every business structure in the city. the Fayette Courthouse. nl Fayette County Bank and Turner HCtel
 The loss is estimated at S500,o0o g. tn S400.Oo0 insurance
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
INDICTMENT IS
 SERVED IN COX
IBy Alaska News Bureau.

CINCINNATI. April f--"Boss" Cox. who disappeared yesterday when an- other indictment for perjury was brought against him. showed up to- day and the indictment has been served.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
GETTING TIRED
 Gf SOCIALISM
- M M. Euraanl

NTIWATKEE Wis April I1. women o5 this city are -warmtnl a ghe polls in the.- erJeavor ,0 dr. feat fhe soaialsuo region of Mayor Sraa and his oonngH who haN" boon in office tor Che past year.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
EAST WANTS
 THE G0MNONER
CBy Alaska News Bureau)

WASHINGTON. D C., April c. One hundred thousand dollars have cen raised In this city for Che pnr- bose of influencing William Jennings rvaa to bring The CommoBcr' here -r nuNILraL-un
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
MEETING HELD
 LAST NIGHT

Tn response to notices in The Alaskan yesterday. a number Of .ae .-ff-ars of SkaEvay attended rlNS nan 1asr night and listened .' ag. 5-sszas hv D- J. P Brawaua and '. U Tanner -------
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
CORRAL ASKS
 FUR LEAVE
CBy Alsska News BursauJ

MEXICO CITY. April 4-vice-Pres- id-nt Ramon Corral. of Mexico. has asked a six months leave Of absence on account of 1T health. Great re- forms are in sight. and peace Is hoped for in the near future
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
WEATHER;
 HEAVY VOTE

The election, although there is a s5od deal of good natured rivalry among the candidates, is very quiet and both sides up to the time of zoe ing to press are confident of ma- iorIty. A great many of the ladies 0s Che city are voting for school clerk. as Che weather is ideal
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
ABE INJURED
 ONCE MORE
CBy Aiaska News Buresu)

NEW YORK April l-AhH At.ui 1.s night injured his shoulder iu H ht with Frankie Burns u 'H.s
 The .uiury may mean .Hn per maurnl retirement of N.laH from the ring
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04

Crisp Doughnuts, Delicious Pies and Cakes. and everything to be found In an up-to-date baker shop can be had at the Royal Bakery. Wbitehorse. Mrs R. Kelsey, Pro pr- -etrass. tf
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
IN
 TACOMA HOT
(Bv Alaska Ners Bureaul

TACOMA. April 1.-The election here is very hot. and tho rivalry is very keen between the supporters of ths present administration and the dissenters.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
PRACTICE IS
 DECLARED OFF
lRr Alaska NeEs Bnreaul

NORFOLK. Va April 1.-The tar. .e. practice which was ordered off Cape May. 70 be participated in by r4 battIesbips. has been postponed on account ot fog.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
BEING
 WELL GUARDED
rRr Alaska News Bursaul

CHICAGO. April 4-Thousands of policemen are guarding the polls at th city election today The betting up until yesterday was at two to one cdds on Carter Harrison for mayor.
 LATER-The contest for mayor Is v-ry close. and ;he voting has been exceedingly heavy.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
SMALLPOX
 AND PLAGUE
rRr Al,sk, Nsws RureanN

ANoY China April 4-EIeFen gaatrs from hrrou.e 0'aEu1 and six raatNs r-rm smallpox were reported within Ha city during the two weeks Fozl
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
NAME MANN
 FUR SPEAKER
CBy Alaska News Bureau

WASHINGTON. D. C.. April 4- Congress assembled at noon today The republicans in the House have unanimously nominated Representative f R Mann. of Illinois. as tba.r oan- Ujate for Speaker of the House for tUe present Congress.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
TAFT MESSAGE:
 VERY SHORT
CBy LlAska Nsvu Bureau)

WASHINGTON. D. C.. April c. President Tafts message which was approved by the cabinet this after. 1oon. contains only one thousand words. and urges the passage of the reciprocity bin. and asks that the tarifs be not changed this season
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
DOES
 N0T COUNT
rRr Alaska News Bureaul

NEW YORK. April 4-Mrs Chas Gates the wife of millionaire Gates son. has announced that she will su for divorce on the grounds of domestic iufeIeity.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04

N .erts tor Home Cooked meal Che Royal Cafe. Whitehorse Quick r.-rfes White Help e
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
STILL
 IS CHAMPION
fnr Alaska News Rureau ]

(By Alaska News BUrsauJ
 CANTON. O. April f-Paeksy Nc, Farland earned the decision oyer Paul Rohler in a fen round fight here last night. Kohler never had chance
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
REPUBS. MIN
 IN MICHIGAN
fRr Alssta NeRs Bureaul

DETROIT. Mich. April l-The re- rubUcans have carried the state and C.ay elections by a small majority
 n.--.n- .-- .n.. rn.lt- AInnt,n
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04

The Ladies Aid Society of the Methodist church will meet tomorrow afternoon at 2s20 o'clock at the home of Mrs. E. ]. Liddicoat
 e w. Averin & Son will be here fer the next two weeks They also arc carrying full line of the latest optical goods 3t
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04

COuncilmanic candidates are as thick on the streets today as bees around a June Rose.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04
CARD OF THANKS.

hereby wish to express my heart fel' thanks for all the kindly acts eI- tended 10 me by my friends. and Mrs c. V Zlnkan particularly. dur lns the Illness and death of my be- loved wife
 Respectfully yours,
 GEORGE MOWL.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-04-04

snbecribe for tNe paIl1 Alaskan.
Milford chronicle., 1911-01-13

health. and not one OF them can be
safely omitted II 1t Is to be retained
However. in spite Of wisdom and care
or possibly because OF a lapse and
neglect OF one or more Of the above
rules. sickness does come into the
home. II is the result OF some trans
gression OF natures laws and brings
its attending anxiety and care What
20 do when some member Of the fami-
ly is III is often a puzzling question.
II is not always possible or necessary
to have a professional nurse. and yet
II is necessary that the patient should
have good care in order that there may
be a speedy and thorough recovery.
Perhaps it were well II the first d.
rection given in times Of sickness
should be. Use common sense and
practice rational methods" and yet
sometimes there is so little real under
standing Of the body that ones in
depreciation OF rational methods and
common sense is far from right. 1t is
not tie Intention In this -aEticle-t
Milford chronicle., 1911-01-13
panaerous Snort.

First Lady reading a newspaper
This golf seems To he a very danger
Gus game. Did you see what hap
peued to man named Taylor? He
went into bunker and was in two
when he came ont.
Second Lady How dreadful,
Yes. here are the words Taylor
getting out i'm two Braid secured a
half"
Does it say what happened to the
other half|
"NO. bur there was worse to follow
According To the report Taylor then
fell altogether 10 pieces. Word Of
Golf.
Milford chronicle., 1911-01-13

pitcher containing hot water. two
wash cloths. a bath towel and one OF
two soft towels for hands and face,
some good soap and a bottle of alcO
hol. When quite ready remove the
/ patients nightgown and wrap him in
blankets. This is done without re-
moving the bedding. which the blan-
ket is intended to protect. The face is
bathed first. then the neck. arms.
chest and abdomen. Each part is to
be wiped thoroughly and rubbed brisk
" as il is washed. BE careful not to
allow any water TO dry without wip-
ing. as this may cause a chill Turn
the patient on one side to bathe the
back and finish with the legs and feet
Do not uncover the body more than is
necessary 10 wash each part and in
drying and rubbing arms and legs al
ways use an upward stroke. Change
the water two or three times during
the bath After the bath rub the body
with alcohol. clean the nails and brush
the hair Do not neglect the patients
teeth. These should be brushed at
least twice a day. particularly at
night The patient will do this for
himself if able to sit up II not it
must be done for him. as in sickness
the teeth are much more liable to de-
cay than in health.
Changing the Sheets.
When the patient is strong enough
the sheets on the bed may be changed
after the bath This can be easily
managed after a little practice. The
fresh sheets should be well aired and
warmed The under one is changed
first. Turn the patient on one side away
from you and roll the soiled sheet
tightly close to the patient Lay the
clean sheet on the side Of the bed |
near you and tuck it in at the side 1
The other side of the sheet is folded |
closely beside the soiled one at the pa
TENTS back Go around to the other |
side Of the bed. turn the patient back ]
on the opposite side and gently pull i
out the sOiled sheet from underneath
Then draw out the folds Of the clean
one and tuck it in well at the side and
end. Pull the sheet firmly until it is
straight and make sure there are no
under the patient to cause
bed sores To change the upper sheet
loosen all the bedding. put the clean
sheet and blanket on top and then
with one hand hold the clean sheet
md blanket and with the other slip
lown the soiled clothing underneath
Draw it our al the foot. then tuck in
he fresh bedding.
Milford chronicle., 1911-01-13

1" o have good health is the birth.
right Of every individual. Some
n times this gift has been denied.
and there is an inherited tend.
ency to disease. But even when this
Is the case good health may still be
attained and; having been attained.
may be kept If the path Of wisdom is
followed. To be free from disease, to
be a normal individual. lies more Of
ten within our own power than many
people suppose. A simple prescription
which will help the person who al
ready has good health to retain 1t and
will also do much in gaining it for the
individual not so blessed, II 1t is faith
fully followed, is this:
Nourishing food in right amount
Sufficient fresh air and exercise.
A fair share Of work and fair
amount Of recreation.
Eight hours sleep out OF each twen-
sty-four.
A cheerful mind free from worry.
few moments thought will show
the intelligent person that each one
Sf these rules is essential to good
Milford chronicle., 1911-01-13
BROOM GlRN MADE HP

For cash an small lots Of broom corn may Be lefi
at ROBINSON & WEBB, GARAGE in Milford,
from whence it will be taken prompt care
Of Special arrangements are made for cleaning
corn Corn with seed on must be left at my factory
on the farm in Cedar Neck. Phone No l47-H
J.E. Webb, Lincoln. Del.
Rural Delivery. 1G-l5.d