Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-04-07
The Judge Knew Mules


l judge, with cruelty to ami
mails. The policeman who arrested
you says that he never saw SUCH in
human conduct as yours.
ct seems that you tore board OIL
a fence and belabored your unfortu-
nate mule with il until you we're too
exhausted to continue the outrageous
performance. It doesn't seem posi-
BILE Cor you to exl lain away such tes-
simony."
Eyes, it is possible" said the pris-
oner, cheerfully. 81 could fill this
courtroom with witnesses who would
convince Your Honor that my conduct
was perfectly natural and proper, and
that the mule was only getting what
was coming to it.
That's the most annoying mule in
the United States, judge, and all my
neighbors know it, and they're always
wondering why I don't feed him
stick of dynamite or curry him with
IN ak. a
'Tt's all very well for a policeman
70 come along and see me rebuking
tina. animal and then jump at con-
illusions, but that policeman never
had to wrestle with such mule.
81 was coming to town this morning
with spring wagon loaded with vege-
tables and real eggs and other pro-
duce. I got az far as the railway
track. There was train coming
about a quarter OF mile away, and
thought had oceans of time to get
across. Well, that mule crossed the
track, and then stopped short, with
the wagon right on the rail, and de-
liberately waited for the train to
come and smash things.
Il did everything man could do to
get him started, but you might as
well argue with rhinoceros as to
try to do anything with that mule
He just stood there, all braced for the
shock, and the locomotive caught that
wagon amidships, and the way my
cabbage and butter and eggs scared
around the neighborhood was a sin.
I'll bet that people half a mile away
from there were shoveling scrambled
eggs off their roofs all morning.
Hell go along for weeks and
months together, as moral and law
abiding as any mule in the United
states, waiting for chance to make
killing. He never fritters away his
energies on small meannesses. He
doesn't kick or bite, like ordinary
mean mules. He just b:des his time
till he can cause regular blamed
holds and knocks things upside down
Last FAN my sister was visiting
me. She's quite a corpulent lady,
weighing about 300, but she's spry and
takes lots of exercise, hoping to keel
her weight down. Well. she saw me
whanging around the place with that
old mule and took it for granted that
the beast was as safe as a wooden
horse.
$50 one day when was away from
home my sister Agnes dug up an OLD
sidesaddle and strapped it on that
mule and climbed aboard, expecting to
amble quietly along and enjoy the
scenery and freHh air.
well, session like that was pie to
hat mule. He hadn't had such an
opportunity in years. He frolicked a.
ound the yards, brushing up against
very building and finally ran under
wire clothesline, and the line caught
ly sister under her chin and hois.ed
.er clear out Of the saddle. and wLer
FRENCH SAVINGS BANK.
How the Poorer Glasses Are Able to
Lend Money.
France in her system of finance
and in her whole scheme of economy
aids and encourages saving among
the people.
The Government conducts a vast
banking institution whereby every
post office has it's saving bank de-
partrent - its caisse d'epargne.
Here, says Harper's Bazaar, any one
may make deposit as low as one
franc GO cents), which deposit Ia
recorded in ones livret de la caisse
d'epargne Savings bank book).
convenient feature of this system
tending to make saving easy is
that one make his deposits in any
post Office anywhere in France, and
may withdraw any part or all his
savings at any post Office, without
regard to where the deposits have
been made.
have never had a servant in
France who had not her livret de la
caisse de'epargne, and yet, the girl |
or woman, If she had no family of |
her own to support, almost invaria- |
hly contributed to the support of Der
fathers family. l have had one mid
dle-agen femme de chambre on |
whose face each day | could read |