The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1911-08-04

1ite Doctor Woods Hutchinson,
% would rather have the gizzard
!, Edelfsen than the conscience of
n, Gideon L. Lowell. We do not
,,v this to reflect on the conscience
!, the former nor on the craw of
ha latter. An easy stomach is the
host evidence OF morality and a
norfect sesame to the kingdom of
heaven. The purpose of the OBJ
servation is not easily apparent, but
there she is and there she'll stay
Mrs sanderson frequently remarked
that when it's put, put 1t should be.
You may not know Mrs. Sanderson
but that makes little difference.
She is good authority.
Last week we left the Caldwell
commercial club in the Jones I'M
dertaklng establishment. We trust
It was properly embalmed and de-
Gently buried. Dyer has never neg
eCted his duty before and we hope
he has not on this occasion. The
club was entitled to decent burial
for good deeds already done. But
she and Caldwell are dead. Pull
out the requiem; let's have the
thnOdy.
We are told the business men
Of Caldwell have raised $4,000 for
general publicity purposes. Last
week we thought it was $4,000. 1t
has dwindled to two. Caldwell has
dwindled too. Let the dwindling
go on. 1t will probably dwindle to
q cipher with the rim knocked off.
So be 1t, and let it come quick.
Quick, old man, quick. is the ease
Of death as brevity is the soul of
wit
But we like to stop, now and
again, and think of the ducks who
are doing it. You fall out of Jones'
INTO Paynters.' I. N. Paynter is the
proprietor of a feed store, and a
very fair old cuss is Mute, X Mute,
or Knutson. Spell it as you please
he once belonged to the city coun-
Gill; but is recovering rapidly. He
PROBABLY did his part and is entitled
10 full measure of credit. We
ADMIT that If he had done it all, he
would have excited very little ad-
mlration. Following Paynter is Mrs.
harris' a sort of queen in the mil
nnery line, in view of the fact that
Sue operates in Caldwell, Emmett
ana Payette, and sometimes strays
over into Oregon. Then there is a
Vnihese restaurant, the which does
not appeal to Dad Patten. Dad Pat
'en operates on Kimball avenue and
ue operates strictly white. He
seems to have inherited a prejudice
against Japs and Chinks. We can
uO' understand that, but there are
great many things in heaven and
curtin that we do not understand
ana were never provided for in our
philosophy. AS Addison observed of
:, 'a'o' Now that is getting up in
'HS air. Such ascensions are dan
Serious Plato INDUCED in tetral-
wy to a considerable extent and It
seems the habit continued after
'ea'h' The bad habits of the phil
,'ophers were sometimes something
ierce.
Bad habits are easily acquired
'uu hard to get rid of. For in
lance look at the commercial club
'"u mo publicity fund. Tantalus
VI" get a swig long before the
committee regalns Its euul-
'orlum; and perchanoe Fred Har-
e"Oo"'r Will be found guilty of
p''o'hE before that happy eondi'
'on arises. The three are billed
VI the Tar and distant future.
II you emerge from the Chinese
's'aurant you are likely to plunge
"'o the second hand store presided
", ner by Raines & Wing. Ralnes and
wing are two gentlemen who look
'''n favor on brass band but are
"'p''cal of commercial clubs, funds
" publicity, etc. and so forth. We
'ount that they came through as
.sely as they might, but that is a
'''"lege enjoyed by the American
''Op'e under the Declaration of In