davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Douglas and the Clan,bake

rival, and as they gazed on the little
dumpy man with the great head, the
great shock of hair and the large, cav
ernous eyes laundering forth at them
from the speakers stand, many were
the comparisons they drew between
him and the tall, gaunt, loosejointed
rail-splitter most of them had seen and
heard speak in the same town a few
months earlier.
Yet for all the diminutiveness of
stature, Douglas held the close atten-
ton of the great gathering throughout
his entire speech. My boyhood recol-
lection of that speech is that it was a
superb political and oratorical effort,
but the impression that it made on me
was slight compared with the effect
caused by the impromptu postscript to
the speech itself His peroration de-
livered with all that power Of oratory
which he possessed to a superlative
degree, Douglas paused for moment
and smiled expectantly into the sea Of
upturned faces before him.
"And now that have had the priv
ilege of addressing my fellow-citizens
of this historic town." he continued, Il
shall take advantage of the invitation
given to me to participate for the first
time in my life in a genuine New Eng.
land clambake. It's aroma first reached
me while l was in the midst of my
speech. 1t has fingered in my nostrils
ever since. It has tantalized me great.
ly. It is very inviting. And, with your
permission, will now step down from
this platform and proceed to revel to
my hearts content in your famous
feast"
A mighty shout greeted this unex.
pected tribute to much-loved native
institution. Then they took the Little
Giant to a place which had been pre-.
pared for him and Toasted him. And
when he had had surfeit he sighed
contentedly, beamed upon the gentle
men gathered about him In the tent
(my father was of the number) and
said: Nov, gentlemen, shall 60 on
my way rejoicing"
downright, 1910, by E. J. Edwards. All
Rights Reserved.)
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Human Postoffice Retarded

cially in the village. Nevertheless ]
had not been there long before l was
greatly attracted by a young woman
every opportunity. I soon had reason
to suspect that she was not displeased
by my attentions, but after while
when we had become so well acquaint
ed that it was plain I purposed keep
ing company with her. there were par
entail objections, and I was practical
ly forbidden the house.
But, the saying is, you know, Love
will find way In that village there
lived a barefooted, freckle-faced, tow.
headed boy of Dutch descent. But he
was as bright as a new dollar. One
day met him in the street
Frank said to him, do you sup.
pose you could carry note for me to
a certain young lady so secretly that
nobody but she would know it?'
at guess I could he replied.
Well do you suppose you could
bring note from her just as secretly? ?
"'You try me and see,' the boy said.
$50 l wrote a little note, discreetly
worded, and delivered it to this Cupid's
postmaster. A day later he came to
me with note which had been en-.
trusted to him by the young lady.
Later in the day-maybe it was the
next day. answered the note and
gave my reply to the boy for delivery.
In due time he brought me another
note from the young lady; and thus
we kept up secret correspondence
that lasted until I proposed, when all
objection was removed to my paying
attention to the young lady. Not long
after that we were married.
well, one time when it became in
perative for me to go to Washington
during Lincoln's administration took
Mrs. Weed with me. My dear said
after we had reached there, I should
like to take you to the treasury de
partment. I want you to meet a gen.
tleman l know there And a little
later we walked into the Office of the
treasurer of the United States.
IT took Mrs. Weed over to a desk al
which gentleman was sitting.
"My dear, DO you know who this
is?' asked.
NO. she had to confess.
What, you don't know our Cupid's
postman?' exclaimed in feigned sur
prise.
Eyes, there he was-no longer the
barefooted, freckle-faced, tow-headed
little village boy, but a full grown
handsome man-Francis D. Spinner
And you can imagine the surprise and
delight Of Mrs Weed when she discov
! cred In the treasurer of the United
States the boy who had been the dumb
and faithful little messenger of on,
counting days"
Mr.. Weed might truthfully have
added that, in return for the services
Frank Spinner gave him in his court
ing days, he took every possible Cd
portunity to befriend the lad as he
grew up. And it was upon Mr.. Weeds
recommendation that President Lin
coin named Mr.. Spinner treasurer Of
the United States in 1861, a position
that he filled with great credit until
1875, when failing health caused him
to retire voluntarily. It was during his
incumbency that women were first
employed as clerks in the treasury de
partment to take the place of the meu
| who enlisted in the Union army.
Copyright. 1910, by E. j. Edwards. Al
Rights Reservedl
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Clever Method Of Bribing.

One of the cleverest bits Of cleo
tioneering dodgery was devised by
an agent who had been forbidden
to corrupt the electors. He called
a meeting and attended with his
pockets full of gold II have to in
form you, gentlemen" he began,
that there is to be no bribery on
our side during this election.
(Hear, hear!) For my part, l do
not intend to give away penny
piece UNEASY silence.) But ]
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Lest He Go HUNGRY

Sometimes men do things out y, o.,
fishness rather than out of kjndnasa
Recently club woman told tn."
story: 1o
"An old couple came in from, ., y.
country with a big basket of lunch to
see the circus. ~
1.-THE lunch was heavy. The o,d
wife was carrying it. AS thew CROSSE ,a
crowded street the husband ha1s
out his hand and said:
"'Gimme that basket, Hannah.
THE poor old woman surrendered
the basket with grateful look
That's real kind o. We, Joshua
she quavered.
Kind! grunted the old man.
Gosh. wuz afeared ye'd git lost, 30
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Lord CIanricarde's Plaque

fectly matched steel-white stones, and
a superb blue diamond scintillates
from the hilt The present owner in.
herited it from his mother, who was
a Miss Canning before her marriage
to the Irish lord, and the plaque is
practically priceless. Aside from its
value to collectors, and its worth as
a specimen of rare and exquisite art
it is incrusted with fortune in jew
els.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
Charles Summers Egotism.

Charles Summers Egotism.
Senator Carpenter punctured the al
legged egotism of Senator Sumner to
the quick.
He Identifies himself SO completely
with the universe that ne is not at all
certain whether he Is a part of the uni
verse, or the universe is part of him.
He is reviser of the decalogue. You
will soon see the Sermon On the Mount
revised, corrected and greatly enlarged
and improved by Charles Sumner. -
s. 8. Eax-"Why We Laugh
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

II that ship that got into New
York the other day with load of ele-
plants and pythons and other crea-
lures could have been stuffed into the
stockings Of several million children
It would probably have settled for all
time their demand for Noah's arks.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

When rat, carry plague and cats
and dogs that kill or drive them away
carry diphtheria and tuberculosis.
both Of which are affirmed by the ex-
perts, it seems there is nothing left
for threatened humanity but to get of
the earth.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

The Episcopal bishop Of Michigan
says that bridge whist players are
Just as much gamblers as Wall street
plungers or Monte Carlo patrons.
They must play for more than a quar-
ter Of cent point out that way.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

That technical secret attack upon
the Atlantic coast by our returning
battleship fleet will be valueless I'M
less the Mole st. Nicholas liar and
the New England faker who heard 50
much cannonading at sea in 1898 are
allowed to get into the game.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Men who began life as walters now
own one of Chicagos biggest hotels.
But, Of course, they were good walters
and never spilled soup down any
body's back nor forgot to renew the
contents of the finger bowls.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

A barber in Duluth has invented
"buttonless suspenders." If you have
contracted the habit of wearing sus-
nenders with buttons on them, fellow
mortal. here is your chance to break
Yourself of 1t.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

A report from Berlin has it that
Emperor William has become inter-
ested in boxing. It is not likely, how
ever, that he will at his time Of life
try for the middle-weight champion
ship of Germany.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

In the year 1910 the American hen
laid IT dozen eggs for every man.
woman and child in the country. We
have reason for believing, however,
that at least several dozen Of those
eggs are still in cold storage.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Miffed by the jeers Of the country
at large over the brand of weather 1t
e supposed to start for the refrigera.
zion of mankind, Medicine Hat pro.
noses to change its name. Since the
noint is on its style of weather 1t
would be more pertinent to change
that.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

By drinking 20 bottles of beer a day
for go days st. Louis man won suit
of taitor-made clothes and $3.50 in
money, but the chances are that a man
with a thirst like that will pawn the
clothes, and he certainly won't have
the money long.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

am afraid there are some ID roc
Gals In this room, and that present.
ly they will lay me on the table and
take 500 sovereigns out of nv noel.
ets. The next few seconds Ia
spent upon the table.-London Cbron
icle.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18
PathoIooist Defined.

PathologIst Defined.
"Pa," asked Johnnie, what is O
pathologist?"
Hes a man who lays out paths in
parks and elsewhere, my boy. Now.
don't bother pa any more, he's busy"
Health,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Maybe some time they will invent
a padded aeroplane which will not
rise more than ten feet from the
ground. Then the careful man will
become interested.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

] He has football in tne fall and
track athletics and baseball in the
spring and now the college student
has ice hockey all winter. And yet
he is said to play too little.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

That New York man who started to
shoot himself but thrice changed his
mind in time to dodge the bullets
may live to congratulate himself on
his fickleness.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

School teachers think they are en-
titled to pensions, but can teaching
be called war since corporal punish
ment has been abolished?
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Morocco Is to pay money to Spain
for the war which Spain recently
fought in Morocco Such is the en-
barrassing consequence Of coming out
OILY second best.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

New York's largest hotel is to cost
$17,000,000. 1t is to be built on Her
aid square at Twenty-fourth street
and Broadway.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

The unarmared cruiser Detroit,
which cost s1.za3.ooO, has just been
sold for $4,000. So run the fighting
ships away.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

A Boston man declares that he can
prove that there are nine hells, and
we presume that discovering that the
furnace fire is out Is one of them.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Goose-bone prophets are Of the
opinion that this winter will stretch
out as long as British election.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Western farmers are returning to
the effete east to buy up the deserted
farms of that section.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Alexander wept because he had no
more worlds to conquer when he
should have hustled around and found
a few.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Pittsburg a1ts to annex about
dozen sf1urbs This is likely to
start a Jew annexation movement in
Cleveland.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Alfalfa in various forms is to be
served at banquet in Colorado.
Now who is brother to the ox?"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Fir lumber has gone gone up one
dollar on the thousand. Now, all to-
gether: This is going too fir!
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

When women are required to sit
on juries they should be permitted to
bring their knitting.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

II war scares keep on accommodating
they may be offered by the dozen ut
reduced rates.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Why worry over good roads when
we are all on the verge of taking to
wings?
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

Another thing that will make MIL
waukee famous is a woman police
man."
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

When doctors graft it is folly to
be sick.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1911-02-18

It takes smooth tongue to side
track bill collector.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28

was administered in his room at a local
hotel
Mr. Hines did not quite understand,
and he asked il the witness said his
room was a swestbox.
1T has been sweatbox for four
nights" declared Mr. Funk 1t was
IN his room, he added, that the detec-
tive told him the name Of his en-
ployer
Attorney Hines asked the witness
further about his testimony that Mr.
Hines did not seem to be under the in.
fluenee Of liquor when the alleged re-
quest for "Lorimer contribution" was
made
MIR. Funk said he had never seen
Hines take drink nor even smoke a
cigar.
What has that got to do with this
investigation 7" inquired Senator Kern.
"oh. no offense meant interectedi
Mr.. Hines. Il smoke, too"
81 didn't think that il would be of
fensive to man from Chicago to ask
| il he took drink" declared Senator
Kenyon
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
Supposed Victim is Found at
Sherbrooke, P. @.
WORKING AS A BUTCHER
Man Reported Murdered and Afterwards
Buried in Woods, Has Been
Working in Canada Year.
Will Return to Maine.

Sherbrooke, Quebec, June 2s.--0fiieers
from Biddeford yesterday located c. J.
Weymouth, who was believed to have
been murdered some years ago and for
whose murder two men and a woman
are held. Weymouth will return TO
Biddeford with the officers.
Recently a clew to Weymouth's where
abouts was struck and report that
he was working here as butcher was
communicated to the Maine authorities
Yesterday officers from Maine found
their man. Weymouth had been work.
ing for the grocery firm for nearly
year. He left on the midnight train
with the officers for Biddeford, so that
the individuals now held for his muir
der might be released. Weymouth has
made his home in sherbrooke for the
past five years.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
N0RM0N'S CHIEF
LAUDS THE TRUST
Sugar Combination Greatest Blessing
Ever Enjoyed by People Of Utah,
He Says.

Washington, June 2s. The Mormon
church is in the sugar business for the
benefit Of its people; It sought Henry
o. Havemeyer's help to extend its sugar
enterprises; it regarded Hayemeyer not
as an industrial pirate but rather as
benefaetor and in combining with him
in the beet sugar business the heads
Of the Mormon church believed that no
law Of the United States was violated.
This in substance was the declara-
ton of the House sugar trust inyes
tigating committee yesterday OF Jo-
seph +. Smith, president of the Nor
mon church and president Of the Utah
Idaho Sugar company. He was sup-
ported in his testimony by Bishop
Charles Niblcy, general manager of the
Mormon church.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
Is the tuberculosis Crusade
Losing Ground?

Despite all the efforts being made by
advocates of fresh air and egg and-mtlk
treatments. the number of new cases mas
not been noticeably decreased.
Write TO US and ask to be referred to
Clergymen, Priests, men and women who
took Eckman's Alteratise and are today
we'll and strong without a trace Of tuber-
culosis-pronounced so by physicians.
years ago when doctors said they would
not live 10 weeks
Could anything be fairer TO yourself
and those who love you and would do
anything to restore YOU to health? II you
are skeptIcal--investigat us. our medi-
cine, our advertised statements. Write
to those who have sent fl affidavits and
testimonials telling how Eckman's Alter
alive cured them. Here is one,
532S Girard Ave, Philadelphia, Pa
Gentlemen: In the winter of 1908, l
had an attack Of Grippe, followed By
Pneumonia and later by Consumption. I
grow steadily worse In the winter of
1904 / had cough. night sweats fever and
raised quantities OF awful looking stun
and later. had many hemorrhages; at
one time. three in three successive days.
Milk and eggs became so dist-steful
could keep nothing down. Three physi-
clans treated me. / was ordered to the
mountains. but did not 60 Eekman's AL
toratiye was recommended BY friend.
After taking a small quantity / had the
first quiet nights sleep for weeks. My
Improvement was marked from the first.
gained strength and weight and appe--
title. never had another hemorrhage and
my cough gradually lessened until en-
tirely gone. / am perfectly well. Every
thing / say here can be verified by my
family and friends"
(Slgned Af1dsyiO Annie Floyd Loughran.
Eckman's Alternative cnres Bronchitis.
Asthma. Hay Fever: Throat and Lung
Affections. Ask for booklet OF cured cases
and write to the Eckman laboratory.
Philadelphia. Pa, for additional evidence
For sale by all leading druerfats and
Burt II. Wells, Barre, ~
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
EUROPE SETTLING DOWN.
Not Getting Any ouieter, but the Land
10 Slowly Sinking.

Not Getting Any ouieter, but the Land
10 Slowly Sinking.
Biologists have of late years come
10 the conclusion that the entire cen
trail European plain. which extends
from southwestern France through the
Low Countries and north Germany to
the Russian Baltic provinces, is slowly
sinking.
The lowest section Of this great
coastal region is that part of Holland
which lies from fifteen TO twenty feet
below sea level and has to be protected
by immense dams and bikes against
the danger OF being submerged.
A Dutch engineer named Ten Cate
has studied this subject and he deals
with Hollands danger at length In De
Ingenieur, a Dutch technical paper.
His investigations go back 1000 years.
and his conclusion is that the Dutch
coastal sinks eight inches In century.
This does not seem very alarming,
but every little counts IN country
which lies naturally SO low as the
Dutch coastal provinces. Besides. there
is no Justification for assuming that
the settling down process will always
he regular. and sudden subsistence
would be very grave matter indeed.
Ten Cate proves his assertions by
pointing to the situation of remains OF
Roman settlements In the Low Coun-
tries. which he calculates must now
lie from Ave to fifteen feet below their
original level. They were built some
sixteen centuries ago.
A further indication of the lowering
OF Hollands level is the fhct that the
low hills or mounds to which as late
as the middle ages people and their
cattle used TO Zee for safety at hood
times would not now afford the neces-
sary protection.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
THE REPORTERS LAMENT.
OF Four Things You Can't Figure .
City Editor 10 One.

OF Four Things You Can't Figure .
City Editor 10 One.
II think I'll have to look for a new
Job" said Ralph, the reporter, gloomi-
ly as be dropped in on bis old friend
Bill.
whats the city editor been calling
you down now for2" asked Bill. with
a wise air.
ut wasn't a calldown this time
replied Ralph. 1T was bit or I'M
qualified praise"
shoot. pal" was Bilrs comeback.
I'm all ears"
"Tve heard people complain about
that, but | thought you would be the
last to mention H." Ralph told him.
Now, keep your goat In leash and
I'll spiel the tale;
THE old man sticks me with q
morning assignment last year on Me-
mortal day. I'm to lose my beauty
sleep and get up at 10 o'clock and
write up the parade. It's bad enough
for morning newspaper man TO get
up in time to report at ] o'clock. SO
I decide to cure the boss BY giving
him the mushiest sort of story. aud
write lot Of gun about the thin
line of heroes who bad fought and
bled In their country's cause. He
comes around afterwurd and says.
Bully boy! That's the kind of story
People like sentiment on an occasion
like this"
This year the old man hands me
the same Job, and / decide to cure
him. and 30 / write him the driesl
sort of story about 800 veterans OF
the G. A. r. being in line, followed
by the ladies Of the w. r. Q. in car
riages | throw in all the statistics
/ can. Afterward be comes around
and says: That's the kind Of story
Too much OF this sentiment and soft
stuff is nauseating. I'll bet the Other
papers slop all over with IL. and no
body wants that kind OF stuff
Now, ask you, Bill. In all sinceri
ty what show have | got OF escaping
the next early holiday assignment
Bill finished polishing the bar and
then. carefully weighing his words
made answer: There are four thing:
you can't figure-a city editor. a jury
the supreme court and woman. And
furthermore, you got to take 'em al
! they come"
Whereupon Ralph concealed fhs
truth of the observation and decided
to retain his job.-Roy R. Atkinson In
| Puck.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1911-06-28
The Double Business.

Champ Clark may now be said to
be famous. They have found his dou.
BILE. or. more properly. the double has
found himself. They usually are self
discovered. The more celebrated the
man the more doubles he has. Dir.
Roosevelt. Notwithstanding the claim
ants had to tighten their upper lips
and give their lower jaws a sort OF
prognathous thrust TO prove 1t. had
coolies of doubles. and Lincoln, whose
homeliness the Creator found inimita-
Bile. had so many doubles that. like
Bill Nyes famous first white child
born in California. 1t was at one time
seriously proposed that they hold an
annual convention. Mark Twain had
a circular letter with which he always
answered his double correspondence.
1t said:
My Dear sirN-Many thanks for your let
ter with inclosed photograph. Your re-
semblance to NE IL remarkable. In fact.
TO be perfectly honest. you look more
like me than / do myself. | was 80 much
| Impressed by the resemblance that have
had your picture framed and am now us-
! ing II regularly IN place Of mirror 10
s 1. CLEMENS,
st. Louis Post-Dispatch.