Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1911-03-24

the visitors gallery, l forgot myse
and began to look up there as | tg!
ed, instead of addressing myself {.
my fellow senators. The ewes ~ .
speaker always wander over b.. .r.
dienee in search of eyes that responf
My glance wandered unconscious,y
until it found an answering CLAN
that fixed it.
This answering glance was not ~
sponsive, nor even approving. It"a
the reverse-and, in spite of me, ].
held me. AT first it was just a r'.
of eyes, in the shadow of the b..4
of woman's hat, the rest of the iaco
the rest of the woman, hid by thasN
in front and on either side. Thu
was a movement among them, and ~
whole face appeared-and | stopped
short in my speech. | saw only th"
face. really only the mouth and IN
eyes-the lips and the eyes of Ele
beth Crosby-an expression of pair
and of pity.
| drank from the glass of water ON
my desk, and went on. When | ven
tured to look up there again, the a e
was gone. Had | seen or imagined
Was it she or was it only memory
suddenly awakening and silhouettin
her upon that background of massed
humanity? tried to convince myself
that l had only imagined, but l knew
that | had seen.
Within me-and, l suppose, within
every one else-there is a dual per
sonality; not a good and a bad, as
Is so often shallowly said; but one
that does, and another that watches.
The doer seems to me to be myself;
the watcher, he who stands, like an
idler at the rail of a bridge, careless.
ly, even indifferently, observing the
tide of my thought and action that
flows beneath--who is he? | do / It
know But | do know that l have Lo
control over him-oyer his cynical
smile, or his lip curling in good-na-
tured contempt Of me, of his shrug at
self-eXCuse, or his moods when he
stares down at the fretting stream
with a look of WEAKNESS so profound
that it is tragic. 1t was he who
was more interested in the thoughts
the passion, the protest, the def
anCe, and the dread-which the sight
of that face set to boiling within me.
Sometimes he smiled cynically at the
turmoil and at other times he watch
ed it with what seemed to me bit
ter disgust and disappointment and
regret,
While this tempest was struggling
to boil over into action, Carlotta ap-
peared. She had never stayed long
at Washington after the first winter:
she preferred, for the children and
perhaps for herself, the quiet and the
greater simplicity of Fredonia. But
Il got to thinking about it, said she,
and it seemed to me bad idea for
a man to be separated so long from
his wife and chidren-and home in
fluences."
That last phrase was accomnanied
by one of her queer shrewd looks.
Your idea is not without merit"
replied | judicially.
What are you smiling att" she de.
manded sharply.
IF it was a smile" said l. at was
at myself"
NO, you were laughing at me. You
think | am jealous
"Of what? OF whom?"
She looked fixedly at me and finally
said: Il want to tell you two things
about myself and you. The first is
that | am afraid of you"
"Why?" said l.
Il don't know" she answered.
And the second confession?"
THAT l never trust you"
"Why?"
Il don't know"
yet you are always telling me |
am cold"
She laughed shortly. so is a sticl,
Of dynamite" said she.
Sho STAYED on at Washington.