davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

The republican state ticket has not many chances Of election and out of the kindness of our heart we would advise our republican friends that while We do not see any way to in- crease the number of the chances we see how they may be reduced by vic ious and personal attacks upon the democratic candidates.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

tCopyrlght 1911, by George Matthew Adamsl
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29
mn THANKsGIvNG TURKEY

THAT THANKSGIVING TURKEY
 Householder-Yo ask us how 10 carve six-pound turkey so 1t will reach nineteen guests Besides a fami' ly of seven.
 Nothing easier, dear friend, believe IS, first you get the turkey. This is the hardest part Of the entire un- dertaking Then you have it cooked 8 nice rich nut brown and placed uron the table. Get the guests all seated so that they can all watch you intently. Then walk over to the stoyepipe and sharpen the carving knife upon it. Jab the fork into the turkey and take of your coat Then swing the bird gracefully around your head three times and jam it down in the platter and go after 1t wisl the knife. First remove the legs. Grab the leg firmly with the left hand and jab around with the knife and listen to advice until you Snd the joint There is only one ioint, and that is an opium joint. Re move your vest and roll up your sleeves. By the time the guests start to get on their wraps 10 go ome you will have the first les re. moved The rest is simple. DcA't get 1t carved until nine o'clock at night. By that time the guests vii all have gone home aud you and the family can have the bird We charge for counsel
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

t paused a bit at China's gate.
 lt listened iong. and then It beard the roar of guns within
 And cackled: Sold agsinl'
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29
C o untry To W n
 Sayings
'kd Howe

It ls esSy to Gpas.nce man tha. 0e IS being wrCnged.
 A modest man is usually admired If people ever near of him.
 It is easy to carry some things So lar that everybody will lose money, and a few get killed.
 A wrong is sometimes nothing more serious than a man clamoring for something he is net entitled to.
 When a man wants to talk fl over
 e thinks he can soon briDs the op
 aT1A.,d [, bls W'' Of think ing.
 There are two things people are quick to notice; when a man wears a wig and when a woman paints her face.
 How is 1t that q widow bowed in griet at the funeral, and seeing no one. can tell after 1t is over who ". there2
 About the only thing that happens in a country town is the appearance in the spring and fall of a strange milliner to trim hats for six weeks.
 In buying things, you are com elled to run almost as much risk as in trading horses; nea'iT ever. butcher will sell you ram for lamb, and little is thought of 1t. a
 There may be pleasure in telling today of the big thing you intend to accomplish tomorrow; but the humil iation you suner tomorrow, when you find you cant make your big talk good, probably offsets it. S
 Man never gets orer it. I know a li6owef who is seventy, f he is day, and as ugly a man as there is in the world. The other day some one spoke to him of paying atten- ton" to an old widow. And the old man didn't do a thing but grin in an idiotic way. indicating that he was -uilty! When l pass the age of sixty # a man speaks 10 me oi love. IT. nook him down.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

T. K. F. says: l don't know what to do with my ashes.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29
THINGS WIZ WILL NEVER KNoV

Who is really the oldest odd Eel lew.
 How it feels to have enough money for Christmas.
 Bow some women have tho nerve to wear some hats.
 Why somebody doesn't invent a practical pipe cleaner.
 Pow some reoDle can own autolno- piles on pedestrian salaries.
 W hat they d. with the chicken that is supposed to go into the chick en sandwiches. sst
 Why tho homeiy men always mar " the prettiest women.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

In buying things, you are com elled to run almost as much risk as in trading horses; nea'iT every butcher will sell you ram for lamb, and little is thought of 1t. a
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

coDgrigft. l.u. ( x lIsther
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

About the only thing that happens in a country town is the appearance in the spring and fall of a strange milliner to trim hats for six weeks.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

How is 1t that widow bowed in griel at the funeral, and seeing no one, can tell after it is over who N. thereE
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

There are two things people are quick to notice; when a man wears wig and when woman paints her face.
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

misunderstanding, ! seems that the
Bisbee daily review., 1911-10-29

There may be pleasure in telling today of the big thing you intend 10 accomplish tomorrow; but the humil
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

The police the and the politicians without
sinister wisdom When life has taken punish
slayer would be inconvenience who didn't do the
killing submits to This the guilty
Also the public appeased when the pubcs
sleeps the arrested oneor lack EVIDENCES liberty
Thus when Fitzpatrick killed to make clear the path
leadership the aspiring Twist police
DAHL who all but volunteered the sacrifice Dahl sm
ngly to JAIL while the real murderer of Fitzpatrick attended
that dead gentemans wake the funeral
This last by the nicer the SIDE
complained Of as trenching vulgarity.
hailed chief Of the Easmans Dahl remained the Tombs
reasonable number weeks then his position
side society but natural the
bling Dahl should dwell warmly crate
full regards Of Twist.
Twist. chief the Eastmans. about
.olk Were his affiliations with the Five Points?
Was therefore the enemy? The Bother Egyp
Twist resolved spoil him the interest Dahl
Twist, with Dahl waited upon The Bother. Argument
short and to the point. Said Twist;
Bother, the Kid'-indicang the expectant Dahl-~s
your graft from It's to be break"
almost checked the beating Of The Bottlers
astonished What the pussan Twist
a step East side SIDE
proverb OF Take you may keep
can" Highland force
o inevitable and accepted Dahl
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

q
maker and had Suffolk position its richest CAPT
talists.
What bridge side
No dealer the device
bank descriptive "viggresh" his oneenth
of his losngs No broke and that
final sunshine ndubably
ton Stuss ticks round full fifth OF
all the vggesh should be given the black
glory thereof.
The Bother to max money. Morally careless
liking the with speculation which
sets folk dealing stocks others dealing cards
those Not that
the Bother weak minded to buck the Wise
prudent solvent he the other and dealt It, his
theater of operations being 1876 Suffolk street
There two the East side These are the
Five Points Monk There smaller
but each other of the
two fights standard Of general
There danger belonging gangs
there Is still in belonging OF them
speak Of folk OF The Boter Five Points
and Monk Easman eud with another and the fires
its will buckle
against the other while live should
fall Membership In neither however that will be
raided and robbed by both
The BOttler's
Castle Dangerous the peril his nights
be reduced minimum. united himself with the Five Points
True he could not be shtocker
but he had and would with It, and like all
demands Bonds given The
Bother would Wherefore
their ranks to receive him.
the chief who the his
On of that sorrowful retirement
Of York and Lancaster rival claimants
Richie Fitzpatrick Twist
Of followers at their backs
Twist, o a savage diplomacy
conference Fitzpatrick
death and Kid DAHL friend Twist
Tar"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

Here's OIL winter purt' nigh gonel
Seems like time goes mighty fast
Hardly git yer ear-tabs on
Tell tn winter days is past.
When wuz a little tyke
Laws! tn winters lasted then
Snow heaped up an hid tn pike,
Thawed, then snow an drift again.
Amt no winter time no more
Nor no summer. fer's that goesD-
We've he'd winters, though, before
I remember when things froze
Tight ez wax! An Christmas time
Wuzn't near to halfway through.
We he'd winter. sure ez I'm
Settin' here a-tel'in' you.
Winter wy, 1t don't half-start
Nowadays, ontell it's done.
Can't know half tn months apart
Lately, by tn way they run.
No, sir. Times amt whut they wus
In tn years / use to know;
Days an reasons fairly buzz
An they use to move 10 slow.
Summer? Huh! When 1 wuz young
Summer wux a time wuth while
Games wux played, an songs wuz sung.
Ever mornin' wore a smile.
Now what is our summer? Say.
1t amt wuth thought. at all.
While you're sayin Yesterday"
It's tomorrer-an' it's fall!
Here's oil winter purt' nigh gone
Fore you know It's here, it's went.
eeems-hke time keeps whiExin' on
Tell not half o. It IL spent
Worlds too busy now. I'd like
To be back whur time went slow
When rs jest little tyks,
An Their want no long ago.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

For six weeks The Bother and Dahl set
tied up, fity-and-ffty. with the close of each
stuss day. Then came fresh surprise. Dahl
presented his friend. the Mailer" to The
Bother with this terse remark:
Bother you can beat 1t. The Mailer Is
goin' to be me partner now. Which let's you
out, see?"
The Bother at bay He owned no
stomach for battle but the sentiment of des-
peration which the announcement of Dahl pro
voked drove him to make stand. To lose
one-half had been bad. To lose ALTO be
wholly wiped out in the annals of Suffolk
street stuss-was more than even his meek
ness might bear. No, The Bother did not
dream of going to the police. That would
have been to "squeal;" and even his friends
of the Five Points had only faces of flint for
such tactics OF disgrace.
The harassed Bother barred his doors
against Dahl. He would defend his castle and
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05


Twist while office again took the trail of the
loft worker
Dahl talked with Twist There but
The Anything short blood would
Twist and without that his leadership OF the
Eastmans a farce.
Bottlers killing, however. must be managed with a
convenonaies For either Twist Dahl
upon offender and shoot him death while
feasible, would be foolish.
Twist to Williamsburg for his friend and ally Cyclone
The bunecked, highly muscled parsonage
professional strong he profes
sionally ingand earned occasionally sdeshow
Coney ISLAM by bending iron bars about his neck twisting
pokers into Corkscrews about his brawny
Twist Dahl into council
explained imperative call The Bottles
Also laid delicate position
himself Dahl
Louis did hesitate but placed himself the disposal
Twist and Dahl The Bother should die he Louis would
o
But when?'
Twist replying, felt that the thing once
mentioned the following evening" nine place
would be The Bottlers establishment in Suffolk
of whom The Bother unafrad and ignorant expert
difficulty In approaching his There would be
others but pracced gang moraltes
etiquette would his mouth Or. If did,
would be only forth peruries
nothing. heard nothing
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05
On a Pinch.

'I've bought a new rvnabout auto"
says the druggist.
"One of those little things that will
only carry two people?" asks the man
who buys most Of his stamps of the
druggist and considers himself reg
ular customer and therefore entitled
to ask questions and give advice
about his affairs.
Yes. 1t will only seat two people,
but then, 1t may carry three In a
pinch"
Blamed II I'd haul any cop to the
station when he wanted to arrest me
for fast driving" asserts the other
man vigorously"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05
ConceIt.

Conceit is something we deprecate
very much In others, but regard a.
1ustinable pride in ourselves.
Conceit Is that quality In others
which impels them to talk to US about
their own attachments even while We
are trying to interrupt them in order
to tell few nice things about our
selves.
Conceit is In its full flower when we
begin to believe all the compliments
paid us.
SO long, however, as we unassuming-
~ deprecate the compliments, others
pronounce us properly modest. Once
we agree we are classed as conceited
The conceited ass. however. is one
who pays himself compliments and
wants others to believe them.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

"what?" asks the roommate.
You're not writing to your rich uncle
for a loan. and making the request on
a postal card? Don't you know that in
such a little place as the one where
he lives that card may be read and
everybody in the town will know you
have asked him for the money!"
Certainly" answers the crafty
youth But Uncle Grimsby will know
that, too, and rather than get the repu-
tation OF being tight old wad he'll
go to the postof1ice and buy a money
order for a good sum and send II to
me at once"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05
That Being the Case.

so she says her complexion is
natural. does she7" asked the first
fond friend. And she says all the
rest OF US use powder"
she does" replied the tale-bearer.
why. the two-faced thing! She
uses twice as much cosmetics as any
other woman in town"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

get word to the Five Points. The Boilers doors
having been barred, Dahl for his side insti-
tuted siege, despatching the Mailer meanwhile to
the nearest knot of Eastmans to bring reinforce
ments.
into the equation. He himself hunting loft
worker" Of more than customary industry and had
thought of either The Bother Dahl. Hap
pening, however upon situation whereof the strk-
ing features were Dahl outside with gun and The
Bother inside with gun, he so far recalled his
oath of office to interfere
With the instinct of his Mulberry street
caste he of the central office opened negotiations
with Dahl He knew the latter to be the dangerous
angle and began by placing the muzzle of his own
pistol against that marauders back.
Make a move" observed the central office man,
"and I'll shoot you in two
The sophisticated DAHL realizing fate moved
not and with that the central Office collected
his armament.
Next The Bother ordered to come forth. The
Bother obeyed In a sweat and a tremble. He
rendered his pistol at word of the law and the
trail Office man led both captves off to Jail. The
two were charged with disturbance" in the sta
ton house, as on the way. Dahl ceased not to
threaten The Boilers life.
"This pinchll cost fine of S." said Dahl, glar-
ing round the central Office the shaking
Bother I'll pay it, an then I'll get square wit
youse Once we're footloose you won't last long
as a drink of whiskey."
The Judge yawningly listened. while the central
Office man told his tale of that disturbance"
Five an costs!" quoth the Judge and called the
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05
Excellant Work.

He Is an artist at tying cravats."
HE is?"
YES, indeed. Why. he can tie a
four-in-hand 80 that 1t will look rs
perfectly artificial ~ a readymadt
one"
A<Nu-~0I1<N2
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05
THE APACHFS +
lOF NEW YORK;
KAILIRLD HTNRY LTW1S

0 born somewhere the banks Of tho Danube and
and steeragewss to this country about ten
ago. In what circles he affected he called THE
Bother He may had another in Austria; but
since he II dead and down under the roots
THE Bother" phrase OF Identification. should
well enough.
The Bother round. inonensive, well-dressed at
fable He also generous the East side employs
the term.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

face-dead without word
There people police arrived
they found only the dead Bother.
The police recalled which had cul
minated in the charge of disturbance"
you amt got me right sconed Dahl to police
There came the inquest and Dahl free
was buried and Twist and Dahl the
grave
The law slept baeyed constabuary went its way but
the knew.
Distinguished the chvalry Points was an
individual known Kid Pogg Only paucy Of years-he
under eigheenwithhed Pioggi topmost honors
The winters snow melted into spring, spring apsed into
dsporng himself at Coney island and Louis fol-
lowing some plan of relaxation at Coney
island. '
Piogg had seated himself at beer house of
call Of one Ding Dong" Twist in Piogsi
being of the Five Points, foe by Twist
who lost no time in mentioning fact
Being in facetious mood, and by expressing his
contempt Tor that gentleman Twist Poggi Jump Of
the window. ~ -
Louis and Twist in Ding Dons's from
which Pogg had been driven efreshment in
the guse or Wine Poeg rageswolen to heart
self at nearby telephone Calling the Bowery
affected by the Five Points Piogg Higher nnu
ence of the clan He told of his from Dnx
Dongs and the then Twist The Higher
Influence instructed Pogg keep sight The very
flower OF the Five Points should be fast az
cable cars could them.
known to Twist and Louis would be the bearer
OF blind message- purpoed to from in ono
OF the cheap theaters of the pacecalcuaed bring forth
Twist and Louis
Stall way" Pogg indicating spot within,
touching distance OF that TITS put em over
the jump"
Pioggs messenger did well his work and Twist and 1r
moved magnhceny albeit unsteady open They were
sweeping the walk clear of mora when the voice Of
Pioggi
oh there, Twist; look herei"
The voice came from the right Pioxei.
position calculated enemy AT double
~ '
Twist turned his head There fash and roar; bull
let struck Twist above the
in Twist down; Louis fell across Nv
There were twelve bullets in Twist eight in Louis while
the cracking of cannonading still alarmed IN.
of the dead twist an ~
dead Louis remained. " ~ >"~
Pogg went into hiding in Greenwich the Five por
had holdout There pulings haufnrs and h,s
perings in dark political conditions had ho
whispered and hauled and pulled satisfactory copdo
Pioggi sent word to favorite officer and h,
Pogg explained to the been thro.,
ened; he had shot only that he himself might live His
was seventeen Likewise there public loss. ~
going OF Twist and Louis had the AVERAGE 80 ~
espectabity The court pondered and ecidA
that justice would be fulfilled by tia E
reformRtory - s
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1911-05-05

Having adjusted details Louis, Twist and Dahl com
pared watches Watches? Certainly. Louis Twist and
Dahl were all most fashonably attired andAs became
members OF nobitysngularly full and accurate
In the important element of videlice that list
OF personal adornments which includes pin and
watch Louis. Dahl and Twist 1t that their time
pieces agreed. This that Dahl and Twist might
successfully their alibis
1t was the next evening. At 1855 O'Clock Twist
obtrusvey in the Delaney street police station wrangng
with the desk the release of follower who
had carefully brought about his arrest.
Come, quoth Twist to the sergeant its next to nine
O'Clock Fix the bond; I've date In East
Broadway at nne-thrty."
While Twist stood thus enforcing his whereabouts
upon the attention of the desk sergeant Dahl eating
a beefsteak in Houston street
What time have got7" demanded Dahl
German who kept the place.
Five minutes to nine." returned German glancug
at the clock.
"Oh. faint time that" retorted Dahl peev
ishy That clocks drunk Call up telephone people
and find out for sure"
The phone people it's nine O'CLOCK" reported the
German, hanging up the receiver.
Hully Gee! didn't think 1t more'n half past
eight" and Dahl looked vrtuousy corrected
While these fragments of talk taking place The
Bother attending to his interests looked
pale and frightened and his hunted eyes here and
there Five minutes went by. The pointed to nine
souchhat stranger entered. AS the clock the
Licking Valley courier. [volume] (West Liberty, Ky.) 19??-current, 1911-12-07
ANTi-sALooN LEAGUE
AND MAINE CIVIC
LEAGUE FALL OUT.

Washington, d. C.-The reports
from Augusta, Me-, and Boston state
that the Maine Civic league, which is
conducting the fight for the retention
Of the prohibition amendment in the
Maine constitution, and the Antl-Sa-
loon league of America are at outs.
The latter league has twelve of It's
paid workers in the state of Maine
assisting in the campaign. Mrs. Ste
vens, president of the w. c. T. u,
and the leader of the prohibition fac.
ton, refused to give her support to the
imported paid orators Of the league.
The league, II is said, then attempt.
ed to get the Civic league to raise
$4,000 for the Anti-Saloon leagues
part in the fight. The amount that
finally was agreed on is not known.
but the Anti-Saloon league and the
Maine Civic league have been working
hand in hand.
Rev. S. f. Nicholson, Washington
superintendent of the league. is deny.
Ing the report from Maine.
Licking Valley courier. [volume] (West Liberty, Ky.) 19??-current, 1911-12-07
STAGE MEDICINE WAS REAL
Veteran Actor For Years Played In.
valid's Part and Took Remedy
for Indigestion.


Taking medicine on the stage ia
not only realistic, 1t is real," said an
old actor. Anyhow. II was so in
my case. Here is copy Of pre-
scription that | had renewed eighty
three times in the three years that
| played the part OF an invalid. /
really did suffer most OF that time
with Indigestion. and the medicine
was prescribed by my physician He
had been hammering away at me for
months before undertook the part,
trying to persuade me to take some
thing
You got 10 take a dose OF some
thing in that second act be said. so
why not make II real medicine and
cure your stomach trouble and earn
your salary at the same timer
That seemed sensible advice. 1
got the prescription made up. and al
though ! have eaten many a fake
meal on the stage and have drunk
many pint OF fake wine, never once
have ! taken a dose Of fake medI.
cine"
Licking Valley courier. [volume] (West Liberty, Ky.) 19??-current, 1911-12-07
HEADS OF NAMES
MANUFACTURING PLANTS
AGAINST PROHIBITION

Bangor, Me.-The heads OF prac.
tically all OF the great manufacturing
plants of Maine are a. unit In con.
demning prohibition conditions as they
exist in the state at present, and ask
ing for regulatory laws under a con,
stitutional license provision.
Fred w. Aver. president of the East
ern Manufacturing Co., which employs
531 men at its South Brewer mills,
believes there would be less suffering
among the men and their families, and
that his company would get more and
better work from its employees, under
system OF license regulation.
Mr.. Aver has been opposed to the
prohibition amendment for over forty
years,
Maine has made fool of herself"
he says, "and has committed enough
grimes through the prohlbitory law in
the last sixty odd years to stop il, and
try something else"
Licking Valley courier. [volume] (West Liberty, Ky.) 19??-current, 1911-12-07
Suffering.

This world would he dreary rnouo
tone without the mountains and the
lakes, the rivers and the valleys,
which have come through natures
great upheavals The sufferings OF
earth make Il the more glorious. Men
is much like this In his own expert.
ence. The blessings OF like have come
In large measure because Of the heart.
aches and Sthe agonles Of men anu
women. They have given Of their life
blood so that others might be en-.
riched This has been their crucifx.
lon. But ont Of their afhlctlon has
come a new life--grown from the seed
OF the besa that died In the old sell
This has been their resurrection =
Charles Sickle
Licking Valley courier. [volume] (West Liberty, Ky.) 19??-current, 1911-12-07
A olseernlnn Psr.on.

Mrs Martins new parlormaid, su
san, appears to be not only extremely
well trained and all that correct
parlormald should be but also young
woman Of unusual penetration. When
Mrs Martins acquaintance. Mrs. Da.
Wis; comes to call on afternoons, Susan
hscends the stairs to her mistress
room and declares TO that rather az.
touished lady that Mrs, Davis, one
OF the gentry Is in the drawing room"
On the other hand when Mr.. Smith,
the book agent. or Mr. Jones. the
piano tuner, rings the front door bell
and sends up card. Susan is not to
be deceived. and announces. "Mr
Jones or Mr. Smith. not one OF the
gentryl" Mrs Martin ia at loss 10
account for these distinctions