Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1911-08-03
ABE'S.
E
By ELMER TROOP SAWYER
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation, 1911.

SCAO q dOl T. u JooAS SAA WIN l1fCu
some distance back Of the college build
ings, / asked Abe, the sweep, who
took care Of my room, to take it for
me.
I'm in a hurry for a reply to this.
Abe,' 1 said. go straight back over
the campus and through the grounds
beyond. and it won't take you half an
hour to go and come"
Yes. sah!" replied Abe. and, taking
the note, he departed.
I waited an hour for him. at the
end of which time be came in. pant
ing.
"Were you kept waiting, Abey" 1
asked.
"No, sab. wasn't KEEP waitin'."
"Then why were you gone so long?"
II didn't go the way yo' told me to
go, sab"
"Why notw
II nebber go dat way. sab. had
q bad sperience on dat route once"
Experience! What kind of an ex-
perienceY
II don't mind tellln' you about it if
yo' won't tell any OBJ de students. Dey
don't b'leibe nothin' about hants, and
dey laugh at me. But / tell you sab.
dere hants on dat road, and dey get in
side de statutes in de park and raise
de debbil."
Get into the statues"
Twas ooh I'm rrrin0 m fn1o W.
about one OBJ 'em. He make me a
good man, though. l own up to dat.
But I hain't got conscience enough to
go that way n mo- nohow.
II war de wickedest man anywhar.
I wal n liar and a thief and every
thing that was bad. Yo' know Pro-
fessor Barnacle? He was student den.
His fader had chickens. ALI us mig
gers lub chickens and watermillions.
When de broilers git plenty big I used
to steal 'em. and when de chickens
wal big and de wutermillions war ripe
I used to go home past the Barnacle[
place, and l take a chicken under one
arm. with me- finger pressed on its
throat to keep it from squawkin'. and
under de udder arm l had a water
million.
when I'd committed these depre-
dations lots OBJ times Mr.. Barnacle
he says to me. Abe. what yo' stealin'
our chickens fog Go long I says; I
hain't got no use TO yo' chickens
We'll. Abe, all l hab to say is dat [
} heard a clatter in de chicken house one
night and went out to see what was
} de matter. | saw Somethin' dark
walkin' away and follered it. l saw
} it go into yo' house,
y "'Fo' Gawd. Mr. Barnacle, | hain't
} teched chicken meat in a year. rs too
poor to buy 'em. and rs too honest to
D steal EN-
ABE he said, 'yo're sacrilegious.'
II larfed when he said dis. TO- |
wasn't convicted oh sin. as de minister
B says. but ! got convicted sho' enough
0 mighty quick arter dat. De water
2 millions war gittin' ripe, and one night.
passiu' de Barnucle place. l TUX a big
h watermilli"n under my arm. and l
thought how good fried chicken would
B taste TO breakfast. Den | went into
de chicken house to git one OBJ EN-.
B Dere war so much squawkiu' dat lit
. out TO- awhile and hid in de bushes
b | saw somebody come out Oh de house
. and look around. den go away
q waited 70 awhile: den sneaked in,
y got ma chicken and went off towards
n ma cabin:
y II war passin' de statute OF General
a Somebody or odder who fit TO dis state
" in de rpbelution when de statute called
n out:
v Hal thar. you Abe!
II stood still as | could TO- de Shak-
. in oh ma legs.
a "'Drap de chicken says de statute.
81 hain't got no chicken
"De right arm oh de statute raised
70 and frowed sornepin at me-. 1 heard il
a splosh on de- yroun'. reckon it was
~ an egg.
Il was so skenrcd at SEEN de statute
~ frow somepin dat | le' go de neck OBJ
N de chicken. and it began to sQuawk.
~ You say yo' hain't got no chicken,
al eh?' says de statute.
W II didn't say nothin to dis.
"'Drap de chicken and de water
. million says de statute.
M II dropped 'em bofe. and de chicken
went off Squawkin'.
W ABE. says he statute. I'm a hant
= what TUX up inside dis statute TO- to
III convict yo Oh chicken and watermil-
lion stealth, and Pm gwine to stop yo'
III dom 1t.
= "'How you gwine to do datT l says.
N "I'm gwine to kill yo'
DAT statute ne Just lifted up his
N arm ag'in and fired Il pistol. and de
ball sung right up above ma head.
W ".Fo' Gawd. Mr.. liant. | says.
4 promise not to steal chickens or
JH watermillions no no If yo'll spa ma
q life
I ABE said the liant, 'yo' not only a
q thief: yo' a liar. How ! gwine know
W yo' keen yO' DrOmiSey'