davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
TWO DAYS ONLY
Remarkable Success of These Tai
ented Physicians in the Treat
ment of Chronic Diseases.
OFFERTHEIR SERVICES
FREE OF CHARGE

The Associated Doctors, licensed by
the state OF Nebraska for the treatment
Of defOrmities and all nervous and chro-
mic diseases of men, women and children,
offer to all who call on this trip, consult
alton, examination, advice free, making
no charges whatever. except the actual
cost Of medicine. AL that is asked IN
return for these valuable services is that
every pereCn treated will state the re-
suit obtained 10 their friends and thus
prove to the sick and afflicted In every
city and locality, that a: last treatments
have been discovered that are reasonably
sure and certain in their effect.
These doctors arc considered by many
former patients among Americas lead
ing stomach and nerve specialists and
are experts in the treatment Of chronic
diseases and ed great and wonderful
have been their results that in many
cases it is hard indeed to iird the divid-
ing line between skill ard miracle.
Diseases of the stomach, intestines,
liver, blood, skin, nerves, heart. spleen,
kidneys, or bladder, rheumatism. sciatica,
diabetes, bed-weiting. leg ulcers, weak
lungs and those afflicted with long
standing, deep-sested. chronic diseases,
that have bailled the skill Of the family
ply stefan should not fail tn call.
According 10 their system no mors
operations for appendicitis, gall stones,
tumors. goiier or certain foIu,s Of can
Ger. They were among the first IN
America t. earn the name Of the Blood
lees Surgeons" by doing away with
knife, with blood and with all pain in
the successful freshmen. of these dan
gerOus diseases.
II you have kidney or bladder tronble,
bring u two ounce bottle of your urine
for chemical analysis ana microscopic
examination.
Deafness often has been cured IN SIN
ty days.
No matter what yonr ailmeut ma, he,
no matter what others may have told
you. no matter villa; experience You
may have had with other physicians, II
will be to your advantage to see them Mt
once. Have il forever settled in yonr
mind. II your case Is incurable they
will give you such advice rs may relieve
and stay the disease Do not put of
this duty You owe yourself or friends OF
relatives WHO are suffering because "i
your sickness. as visit this time costs
you nothing and may help !ou.
Remember, this free offer il for two
days only.
Married ladies' must come with their
husbands and minors with their fathers.
Office ut Thurstnn hotel, Columbus
Monday and Tuesday, May and {?
Hours I'D q. N. to = p. III.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
SOME GOOD THINGS TO EAT
Novel combInatlon % Fresh Mush-
rooms WITH oausa0es-oelleious
EoQ Dish.

Have you ever tried broiled sans-
ages with mushroomsf' asks cor
respondent Of tho Eplcure.
As q matter Of fact the sausages
are not broiled at all, but the smallest
of breakfast sausages are laid IN
sizzling hot frying pan and cooked
brown on one side. then turned and
taken out to drain on paper when suf-
ficiently cooked.
Some fresh mushrooms that have
been peeled are then set cooking In
the sausage fat. and are served with
the sausages on slices Of toast which
have been buttered. For q change add
a few slices Of bacon to the dish OF
sausages before cooking the mush-
rooms.
"A certain egg dish that was in
vented in a Latin quarter studio In
Paris is delicious. Butter some little
earthen dishes such as are used for
shirred eggs and break one or two
eggs into each. Sprinkle With salt
and pepper, crate on a liberal quantity
of dry Gruyere cheese. add some bits
of butter, pour over cream to cover
and bake in & hot oven until the
eggs are set.
For another dish: Put q sweet
Mexican pepper on Pimento morrones
the timed variety-in the bottom OF
a custard cup or earthen egg cup.
break in a fresh egg. add salt. pepper
and butter, and bake until the egg is
sufficiently cooked. Serve with fingers
of crisp buttered toast"
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
COULD TELL HIS LUCKY DAYS
Man Who Creates Sensation at Monte
Carlo Talks Of His Good
Fortune.

"Win Marlborough" said a Bloom
ington man, ''is the sensation OF the
Riviera. He has been winning at Mon
te Carlo at the rate Of thirty or forty
thousand a day.
will told me last month, at the
Cercle de la Mediterranee In Nice.
that he attributed his good fortune to
the fact that he could always tell his
lucky days.
He said with laugh that the first
turn of the wheel told him everything.
In its startling revelations the wheel,
he said, suggested the young earl who
fell in love with the pretty Monte
Carol chambermaid.
The yonug earl found a Monte
Carlo chambermaid so irresistible that
he proposed to her and was, OF course.
accepted. So one night he took her
motoring, and in the course OF the ride
he produced a bottle Of champagne.
I'll open it, said the pretty cham
bermaid. oh, let me open It,
And while the car sped along the
Corniche in the moonlight she I'M
fastened the foil and wire and twisted
out the huge cork so deftly that not a
drop Of the champagne escaped.
But the young earl pushed rudely
from him the pretty. smiling chamber
maid.
"'You have deceived me- he mutt
tered, hoarsely, I am not your first
love-"
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
OF SUCH ARE PR0oFREADERs
Little Miss Has Painful Struggle Dur
Ing Spelling Lesson Conducted
bv Her Father.

Ralph Royston, who IL q salesman
for one Of the big printing machinery
houses, lives in Dyker Heights. Brook
lyn. He has i've children and one OF
the youngsters. girl. IL q VIGOROUSLY
bad speller.
The other evening Mr.. Royston was
endeavoring to help the child with her
studies. The girl had to spell even
w." and with much painful effort she
started "e," then "v." then hesitated
and haltingly suggested e" again. and
having progressed thus far stopped.
We'll, go on" said the father. as he
pronounced evenly" slowly and care
fully, to help the youngster. Whats
after 'e-v-e'?"
The little girl thought and thought
and then suddenly saw light.
r." she said.
Her father. who couldn't understand
why she could not get the word right.
asked her with some Impotence. why
r."
"Oh, yes" exclaimed the little one
with a glad cry Of triumph, that's It!
EV-E-R-Y-R. Evenly"
Mr.. Royston laughed and the sisters
and brother Of the struggling speller
laughed, and then the little girl under
stood that she had blundered terribly.
And then she did what little miss ID
sure to do at such time. She wept
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
SHIPS THAT KICK LIKE MULE
sue to the Man ct Steer
ING Wheel.

When sailors join a ship almost the
first question asked by each one as he
takes the wheel for the first time is:
Does she kick"
Kicking. as it is called by seamen. IS
due to the action of the water under
the lee Of the rudder, when the YES
sells stern. which has for the moment
been borne skyward on the crest OF a
wave, falls back again into the trough
with such terrific force as to make her
tremble fore and aft. and perhaps
wrench the wheel from the grasp of
the steersman.
Sometimes it happens that he is
taken unawares. and being unable to
let go in time he is flung right over
the wheel to the other side of the deck,
often receiving serious injuries. Some
times man will be pitched right over
board into the sea. and a recent case
is known of a man who received a
blow under the chin from one of the
spokes and died Few days later from
the effects
In some of the worst types of kick.
ing straps are used regularly in near.
ly all weather. and many sailors re-
fuse to 60 to sea in ships which are
known to be confirmed kickers.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Arts and Crafts in Janan

or total membership of $50, as
reported at the annual meeting in the
Twentieth Century club. the Society
of Arts and Crafts has 237 members
in Boston. 1873 in Massachusetts ont.
side of Boston. twenty-six in other
states and territories and five in for.
eign countries. one being in Japan.
The jury reported that the work in
metals had improved much during the
year. enamels have improved in color
and design. Wood carving has i'm.
proved somewhat: textile work and
embroidery have not improved, nor
has work in ceramics. The member.
ship committee reported that eighty
eix craftsmen and sixteen associates
were added to the society during the
year and fifty-one have dropped out
OF membership.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
mind YOUR P'S AND Q'S~
One Theory 10 That the Old Saying
Originated In the Printing
Office,

Several explanations have been
given Of the origin OF the phrase
Mind your P's and Q's" One is that
It is derived from an old custom Of
hanging a slate up in All alehouse on
which was written p or Q-that is.
pint or quart-against the name OF
each customer according to the guam
tity which he had drunk; to be paid
when the wages were given on Satur-
day night.
Another explanation given in the
Dietetic and Hygienic Gazette is that
the sentence originally was Mind
your toupees and queues" The tou-
pee was an artificial lock Of hair and
the queue the pigtail of olden time.
A riddle used to be in vogue as fol-
lows: Who is the best person to keep
the alphabet in order? Answer: A
barber. because he ties up the queues
and puts toupees in irons
Charles Knight gives the most
plausible explanation, as follows:
q have always thought that the
phrase Mind your P's and Q's' was de.
rived from the schoolroom or the
printing Office. The forms OF the
small p's and as in the Roman type
have already been puzzling to the
child and the printers apprentice. In
the one the downward stroke is on the
left Of the oval; in the other. on the
right.
Now, when the types are reversed.
as they are when in process of dis
tribution they are returned by the
compositOr to his case, the mind of
the young printer is puzzled to dis
tinguish the p from the q. In sorting
pi or a mixed heap of letters, where
the p and the q are not in connection
with any other letter forming a word,
I think IT would be almost impossible
for an inexperienced person to distin.
guish which is which upon the in
slant"
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
onium In Barrel Slaves.

Through some clever work on the
part OF the customs secret service
men 1879 cans of opium hidden in the
.tayes of barrels containing lamp
backing were seized recently and the
would-be importer and his assistants
were arrested.
As the slaves of the barrels were
rather thick just in the center instead
of being followed out. the smugglers
had carved out a small sort of pocket
large enough to contain a narrow can
Of opium in each stave. When the
slaves were set together it was impos-
sible to see these gs.-Manila
Times
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
MIR. Widows Than Widowers.

The proportion Of remarriages
shows an almost continuous decrease
saws the registrar-general in his re
mort on the births. deaths and mar
riages in England and Wales during
1909.
The number Of widows. he states, Is
always much greater than that OF
widowers. because in the first place
men marry later in life than women:
secondly. because the duration OF
male life is shorter than that of fe'
male life. and thirdly. because the
proportion OF widows who remarry is
much lower than the proportion OF
widowers who remarry.
Marriages Of persons described as
divorced have steadily increased and
in the year 1900 were the highest on
record.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
posed by Doser by Arithmetic.

Before wireless Geography was
thought of. and the patient could COM
municate with the shore doctor. the
captain was the ships doctor. says
the London Chronicle. He had a med
icine chest with numbered bottles.
and book of instructions. There is a
ships carpenter still living who owes
his life to the captains treatment. It
was rheumatism. The captain read
in the book of instructions: IN cases
OF rheumatism one tablespoonful Of
No. IL three times a day" There had
been a run on No. II. But &C. and
IS" were full. Il reckon that makes
IL" said the captain. And he cured
the carpenter by arithmetic.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Zone Man."

II have servant girl who is capable
and good natured and whom wouldn' I
willingly part with. but she troubles
me one way" said Mrs. Clockley to a
visitor She is Finn and knows
but few words of English. so the ar.
rival of anyone from a guest to gro
Ger boy is heralded by her footsteps
and the solemn words:
Zone man.
1T is laughable and vexing. l have
to 60 all the way downstairs to ascer-
tain who il is. | am thinking of hav-
ing series Of mirrors put up to re-
fleet the visitors image upstairs. Or
perhaps I can invent a coming tower
such as submarines are equipped with
AT any rate shall never be able
TO stand il until she learns enough
English TO tell who wants me-"
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Oamnlnq Evidence.

Madam" says the agent Of the
black hand. I'VE have a photograph
Of you and Count de Gayleigh riding
In an automobile. Send $4,000 to US
or we will publish the picture"
What care II" haughtily says the
lady. The Count is a gentleman in
every way and. besides. he is going to
marry my daughter. There can be no
scandal connected with my riding with
him
That's not the point. It was an
1905 model car"
With a low moan the unfortunate
woman sank to the floor. after giving
a feeble indicatio~ that on revivine
from her faint she would write
check for the hush money.-Life.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Then He Struck.

A few days ago second-class stok-
O. was paraded before the command
ing officer Of the Devonport naval bar
racks on 2 charge OF insubordination.
His insubordination took the form OF
resistance 70 being introduced to the
swimming Bath. Asked what he had
to say for himself. the youth replied:
Sir. I've only bin in the navy three
DAYS. The first day the doctor drawed
six Of my teeth The second day I
was yaccinated. And the third day
the petty oflcer he says. Cum along,
we's a-go!ng to drown yer!'"-I.on.
dopiTruth.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
si,os HYMNS 70 Her Chickens.

woman living near here never
saws "Chicky. chicky, chick" when
sha wishes to feed her chickens
When she goes to the hennery with
feed she sings a church hymn. such
"a Rock Of Ages" or Holy Bible.
Dook Divine: Precious Treasure.
Thou Art Mime" and the "biddies"
make a bee line rush toward her from
ell parts of the yard.
The chickens recognize her voice.
and will not rush to any other person
with the same speed. even if the
same hymns are sung.-Clay City
correspondence Indianapolis News.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
The Galaxy Of Double Stars

Coburg. lane COUNTY. village of 500
people. boasts two pairs Of twins
5crn within the last six weeks. and six
pairs of various ages in attendance
upon it's public schools. Upon the
basis of these facts Colonel Roosevelt
is to be invited to visit Coburg while
In the state and say a few encourax.
ing and congrMulatcry words to the
parents OF the vilase-rortland Ore.
CONAN
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Complex American Legal Problems.

No country has such complex and
varied problems to cope with as the
United States. Conditions arising by
reason Of the heavy tide Of immigra-
ton from all countries. including gen.
tiles. Jews. Greeks, Turks. Mohamme-
dans, those of all religions and those
with none: those coming to promul.
gate socialistic doctrines. the perplex.
ing Chinese and Japanese questions il
the west. the abolition of slavery. the
rights of trusts. the organization anc
rise of declarations Of labor. have
raised perplexing questions which have
demanded the attention more or less
Of the criminal arm o. the law.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19

doctor. 1t is very
speedy on the road
and always re!ia-
bic. The old say
ing that thine is
money" is m OF G
than true in the
case Of the profess
.;Dool mon TnNhis
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19

Railroad travel is usually uncom-
Portable COoped up in a s;uity day
coach is an experience that most tray
cling statesmen despise. Besides its
discomfort, it's expensive. Railroad
and livery bills are always high and
make continual pull on the pocket
book. IL you are wise you'll save this
Outlay and make travelling enjoyable
aid healthy, by purchasing Ford.
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19
Statesmen - Doctors You
Can Save Money with a Ford

The medical profession is one that
usually requires instant service. The
doctors time is never bis own day or
night. He must answer calls prompt
~ or lose his practice The horse and
buggy used by the doctor to hasten
his call is fast being pushed into the
background and supPlanted by the
motor car. In design the Ford Tor
pedo Runabout is the ideal car for the
The Columbus journal., 1911-04-19

The original pur-
chase price OF the
Model L is small.
Consider, thai Inr
the price you &c; 1.
car with all The
useful equipment
necessary 10 make
anv trim under aDy
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1911-04-25
FACTS ABOUT THE SHAMROCK
ia an Entirely Different Plant In varl.
GUS Sections Of ths Emerald
lale.

rose By any other name would be
na sweet, and ihe fact that the sham
rock Of old ireland Is an entirely diff
erent plant in various sections of the
Emerald isle IN no wise Affects the
romance that attaches to the name
The plant generally exported from
ireland under that name IS one Of the
hop clovers, Trifolium minus II is
mistake 70 think that this plant
viii grow only in ireland. II will grow
and thrive IN any temperate climate
when properly cultivated IN fact,
there is no plant known as shamrock
which IS peculiar to Ireland. White
clover. for instance. known In vari-
ons sections or Ireland as shamrock,
grows ~ the United States n great
abundance. Black medic and wood
sorrcl are designated as shamrock in
certain localities The wood sorrel
may, il fact, be the shamrock Of song
and story Ordinary red clover is
somctimes rallied shamrock In the
United states
Bnt, after all. n pretty sentiment
should not be interfered with BY bo
tanical experts what matters their
Latin names. SO long as the three
leafed bit Of green grew near the cot
iage Of the fathers in the ould coxn-
tryi
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1911-04-25
PETTY SINS THAT WORRY
Those We Are inclined TO Pamper
and Stroke the Hard Ones TO
Get Rid Of.

What is your pet sin. and is II a
comfortable one to live with We
are not speaking Of the terrible sins
Of life. for they are at once too big
and too fsrocious for even the most
daring to coddIe Their function is to
rayage and deyastate. 1t is the petty
sin we are inclined to pamper and
stroke. which we find difficult 70 rid
ourselves Of
Does II not, like our pet economy,
cost us more than It is worth? Does
insincerlty. or meanness. or any really
petty trait pay one to give it house
room? II they made comfortable or
entertaining guests, then one could
understand the tolerance with which
many people house them. but they are
neither
They are the kind Of guests that,
once allowed your door, take posses
sion OF your house You cannot CON
anr them to a small back room. where
ns one viii see them. for they insist
upon forcing themselves into every
situation. and no crack or corner is
free from their hateful presence
The longer You allow them TO stay
the more loath they are to depart To
roddle them is fatal The oaly way
70 treat them IS to never let them get
foothold in yonr house, or II they
( succeed In establishing themselves TO
turn them ont the moment you discov-
er them
The question IS does 1t pay to have
guests SO Objectionable staying in
ones houseg Is Il not really a terri
bic nuisance to be ashamed OF them,
ret continue to have them about9 Ands
IS it not embarrassing to have inSsn-
ceriiy show her smirking face when
truth is calling on one. or to have
meanness obtrude her ugly head when
generosity knocks at ones door,
And they are as expensive as they
are illmannered, these troublesome
guests They demand all sorts OF
things One IS constantly giving IN
70 them They are never satisfied.
+ So why does one ever take them un-
der ones roof at an?
Insincerity IS famous for comphcat'
Ing ones life and landing one in EN-.
baFrasslng situations. while meanness
never makes a friend and IS always
\ disagreeable It Is better for girl
10 turn a deaf ear. to all their ad.
vanees
They will seek in a hundred differ
emit ways to enter your house, but
Just remember this, that II you have
them then truth generosity. sweet
ness and toy win refuse to visit you
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1911-04-25
COURAGE AND BLUFF
NEW YORKER MADE UP oFFlFTY.
SEVEN VARIETIES.
Southern Society Womsn's Estlmass
Of the Average Man and Woman
That Make Up Population Of
Gotham.

New Workers are made up OF fifty
seven varieties Of courage and just
dash Of blud
That Is Miss Scotia Sorin's estimate
Of the men and women who SO proud
ly sign New York after their names
when travelling Miss sorin, south
ern society woman and author. often
has visited this city.
you see,y this young woman said.
my opinion OF the people Of this great
little world Of It's own has deem
formed from studies made for some
time. and whenever think of New
Yorker-that Is person who has
come 10 the city to make livelihood
and has won out and made good
can only picture creature Of the
most wonderful bravery In the world,
for to merely exist. let alone work. in
this place one must have unlimited
courage
In great place like New York no
slipshod work is permitted. and when
one cUntemplates the numbers Of
young men and women who cone here
TO work every year without expert
ence, without talent and with good
WIN to do their best II Is a courage
almost beyond my understanding
They are entering fields Of work and
endeayor which are now nearly filed
with experienced people; they are en-
tering in the greatest competition I'm
aginable. that Of winning bread In
Big. overcrowded city. In which ever
one is interested In himself and little
thought Is given to the other person.
But the dear New Workers are the
funniest buffers in the world They
are not maliciously so. but IN every
business. in every home. in all pleas
ures. there Is just little dash Of bluif
tnat adds piquancy that you don't
find in other people. They do know
good deal in many ways. but they
always want one to think that they
know just a tritie more.
THE bluff that always amnsss ms
IL the love Of the New Yorker for his
United States Come to the point.
what does he know about his United
States? Not thing. except what be
has read and heard. for a New York
er won't travel over his own country;
but the moment he has the money he
will sail for Europe, just as the man
out west or in the smaller city will
come to New York when he can AZ
ford IL"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1911-04-25

Man VIII Lie II Bed and SILVER
Rather Than Get UP for
Extra Wraps,

Perhaps man never realizes 80
surely what a fool ne is as when he
wakes up on cold night with the
feeling that there is not enough cover
ing on the bed While he is perfectly
aware that he is shiyerIng, all his
powers OF action seem 10 have de-
serted him. He will no doubt draw
his knees up close to his chin, but
that Is about all he will do to relieve
his suffering
AN this time, strange to say, his
mind IS just as capable Of thinking as
II he were not In haif daze. He real
ICES fully that in his wardrobe with
In few feet 81 him. are enough extra
wraps 20 laugh the cold to scon and
make him the happiest man IN the
world. Yet he will huddle himself
into a cramped position, and lie awake
10 hear his teeth chatter rather than
get out Of bed and walk few feet.
All this time he Recognizes the fact
that he IS a fool. and though heN in
wardly curses himself for bis timidity,
some strange spell seems to be cast
over him that prevents his doing what
he should do There he shivers until
sleep comes to his aid In The morn
Ing ne win vow never again to be
such coward. though be knows IN
hts heart that when the thing occurs
again he win be Just as big a fool as
before.