The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1911-05-12
RECTOR WAS A FAN
HEARD THE SCORE AND CALLED
FOR LONG METER Dox-
OLOGY.
EVEN BISHOP FORGAVE HIM
Echo Of Great Struggle Between Cubs
and White Sox-How Zwilling
Dieted to Reduce His Weight
Most Freaklsh Catch.
By HUGH 8. FULLERTON.

BY HUGH 8. FULLERTON.
This La q story which is perfectly
proper to tell, because one OF the
bishops of the Protestant Episcopal
church laughed until tears rolled down
his cheeks over 1t and forgave the
rector concerned. The rector is in
charge of a prominent Chicago church.
end it so happened that he is and al
ways will be a White Sox fan.
In the vestry are two more White
Sox fans, who shall be called Smith
and Brown, because they would never
forgive the use of their real m
The story concerns the time that the
Chicago Cubs, representing the Ma
tional league, and the White Sox,
champions of the American league,
met to decide the worlds champion
ship.
There was civil war in Chicago that
fall. The series divided families and
caused neighborhood riots. Friends OF
a lifetime ceased to speak and good
citizens blackened each others eyes
IN the street because, foorsooth, one
thought the Cubs would win and h
other picked the White Sox.
The rector and the two vestrymen
had a box at all the games during the
week-but, alas! for them, the final
fell on Sunday and, worse than that,
OF a Sunday for which the rector had
announced special matin services.
But for the special services, Smith
and Brown might have compromised
their consciences and seen the game,
but knowing the rector would note
any absence on their part, they duti-
fully attended their church duties.
The special service vas two-thirds
~ when Brown was unable to stand
1t any longer. With intensely solemn
face he arose, tiptoed down the aisle
and made a quiet exit. Once outside,
he dashed madly across the street to
the drug store and reached a tele-
phone. A few moments later he re-
entered church. His face vas
wreathed with a t~eatific smile and, as
he carefully parted his coat tails and
resumed his seat, his chest overhung
his body like a bay window, and the
absolute contentment of his smiling
countenance was only to be rivaled
by a calf chewing a dish rag.
Brother Smiths pew was directly
across the aisle. He was twitching
with suppressed anxiety, and seeing
Browns face, he could contain him
self no longer, but stretched his neck
across the aisle and whispered:
"Who won?"
His whisper was audible to half the
church and the rector paused in his
discourse.
1.-The Sox," replied Brother Brown,
his smile spreading, and his exultant
whisper penetrating even the choir
loft.
For an instant the rector was dazed.
A murmur ran through the church.
Then the little rector regained his
composure, aud said, calmly:
"And now that Brother Brown has
told us who won, he might tell us the
score"
Brown did not hesitate. Swelling
his chest further he proclaimed:
Eight to three"
A litter al over the congregation
as the rector, without raising his eyes,
said:
1--WE will now sing the long meter
doxology three times"
Little Alexander Zwilling, cheru-
bic looking (not acting) outfielder of
the Chicago White Sox, is a native of
Battle Creek, Mich. He probably
could make more money travelling as
an advertisement for the health foods
of that place than he ever will at
baseball. He looks like the picture
of Mellins' food babies, and is so
plump and angelic appearing that the
pitchers hate to strike him out. But
Manager Hugh Duffy decided Zwilling
was too plump. One afternoon Little
Alexander was thrown out at first on
an infield bounder which Duffy thought
he ought to have beaten to first, and
he called the cherub.
Here, Zwilling," he remarked,
you're too fat. Get some of that
weight of and you'll go faster"
yes, ! within dieting now" re-
marked Zwilling.
Two weeks passed and Zwilling
looked plumper than ever.
You'll have to take some of that
weight of, or I'll send you back to the
minor leagues" cautioned Duffy.
I'm dieting to take it or" respond
ed Zwilling.
What are you taking?" asked
Trainer Buckner, who had not been
consulted in the matter.
I'm taking nearly a pint of olive