davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

this. / think after the theater is
rather late to sit out on the porch
unless on warm evening and when
other members Of the family are up.
see no harm in friendly letter or
an occasional postcard to boy friends
who are out Of town. provided moth
er" does not object
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Danoerous Story

A Yale undergraduate has been nav.
ing fairly lively time OF II during his
summer vacation, and when the allow
ance has not been keeping schedule
time
He was invited out TO dinner with
his mother, and he was seen to get q
bit nervous when she began one 81
her favorite stories This concerned
the burning of their home. on which
occasion the sons watch. left on a
bureau. was found ticking in the ruins
after the house had been destroyed.
At the conclusion OF the story the
college boy jumped up abruptly and
: left the room with his handkerchief
over his face as II suddenly seized
with nose bleed. He did not return for
several minutes, by which time the
conversation had drifted
After dinner the "undergrad's'
chun asked the significance of the
move.
"I'll tell you, but nobody eise." said
he. when mother told that story
was afraid she was going to ask me
to show the watch. Evening
Post.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Ral.lno Fooastuff..

Il know c;ss man who is making
a fortune raising cucumbers on q
town lot"
How does he do it,"
He buys them from the producers
for 10 cents dozen and raises them
to 5 cents apiece"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

My dear. It all depends upon the
young man as to what you will find an
interesting topic of conversation. SOME
like football. others golf. some are
camera fiends or others are book
worms; Just cleverly find out what
the particular chap likes and then get
him started and you listen and he will
think you are Just fnc.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Proper Hour 10 I ,ave.

am very much interested in your
department in the paper. viii you
please be kind enough to help me?
am twenty-six yeas old. / am very
much interested in boy friend and
he In me. When he comes to my
home how long should he stay In the
EVENING" At what hour would be the
proper time for him to leave7
MIDGE G.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Artssian Well Ia SUNK.

Lake City, Nov. 20-An artesian
well has been made at the Sturgeon
farm south of town that throws q
stream of water four feet above the
ground. The we'll Is los feet deep.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

Of the case and at the base OF this
flap leaf Of soft wash leather is
sewn. upon which the razors may be
polished after they have been used
The case Is fitted with ribbon strings
by which It can be secured when
closed. and this is illustrated in the
small sketch on the right-hand side.
The word "Razors" can be worked
upon the front of the case. as sug-
gested. or in its place initials or some
pretty floral design may be embroi-
dered II desired
The leather leaf may be easily re-
newed when It becomes cut or soiled.
and for lining the two pockets for the
razors soft wash leather is preferable
to silk. but the latter is perhaps more
easily manipulated.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Reply to "undeelded. /"

AS I am young would like to ask
your advice. Are the girls supposed
TO ask the boys to accompany them
home or should the boys offer to &C
company them? Is 1t proper for
q young girl to sit on the porch with
young man after coming from the
theater or other places? Is It proper
for girls OF sixteen to write letters to
boys In another town. and II not may
they correspond by postcardsf
UNDECIDED.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
johnson Commits Suicide,

Burlington, Nov. 20.-J. p. John
son, a well-known grocer. aged SO
years, shot himself to death. No
cause Is known. He leaves a wife
and several children
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

OF Interest to Young Men.
Will you please give me an idea as
to few subjects that are entertaining
to young men? R. e. N.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Separate Waists.

Separate waists are always worn
by some women. and there is every
indication that during the winter the
more elaborate waists of lace net and
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

Tea or haif-past is usually consid-
cred late enough for man to remain
when calling and he Is the only Wis
itor; OF course there may be excep-
tons to this rule. but 1t IL pretty
safe one to follow.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

II you had told me the object
could have given you better sugges-
tons: II for pleasure only you could
call It the Merry Larkers." II for
study and Improvement how would you
like -Cresco" ci-cle?" "Cresco" means
to grow; or II for benevolent purposes
think willing Workers" or "Lend-a-
Hand" Club would be good.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

SarsapariIIa

,Eradicates scrofula and all
other humors, cures all their
effects, makes the blood rich
and abundant, strengthens all
the vital organs. Take it.
Get It today in usual liquid form %
chocolated tablets called Sarsatabs.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

"They tell me Daring Ike's dead. II
that right?"
Sure; shot plumb through the
heart"
We'll, / amt surprised, then; his
heart always was weak"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23

Girls never ask the boys to see
them home. II is the place and privi-
lege Of the masculine gender to do
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Name for GIrIs Club.

About nine or ten girls. aged sixteen
to eighteen. have formed a club. for
which they would like to have you
suggest name. N. G.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1911-11-23
Angry eInIelsh.

Old Biffleigh. after thinking ruefuliy
Of the gas and coal that were being
consumed downstairs. was Just drop
ping OF to sleep when he was reused
by a noise from below. "Evai" he bel
lowed. making his way to the top of
the stairs. "Evai What on earth's that
bowling down therer' "Howling. pal"
came the answer. IN shocked tones
why. it's Mr.. Chuffer singing Love
Me and the World Ia Nine" Then
for goodness sake love nim." growl
ed Biffleigh. "and perhaps TIE silly
young ass win be going to look after
his property"
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Freshening Frills.

Do you wear one of those large
frilled muslin jabots with a coat and
skirt that look so smart and fresh:
There is always trouble about them
because they soon grow soiled, and the
laundress tears them all to rags when
washed.
friend who dresses very smartly
on small allowance, told me how she
manages. Get cents worth of pow
dered magResia and keep it in one of
those little pepper sIfters with holes at
the top.
Whenever you take off one of the
frills. pepper it all over with magnesia
and Iay il in a box which is reserved
for frills only.
Before putting it on again, brush it
with tiny soft brush. Then the mag
nesia comes away, and brings all the
dust and spots with it.
You can wear a frill a dozen times
and it looks quite fresh to the end.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Dashes of Color.

A tendency to audacity in touches of
relieving Ecolor shows throughout the
ranks of the imported tailored costumes
where these are not of the extremely
severe kind, and some of the color
schemes introduced are really quite
startling So extreme has this fad
been lately that there has been feel
ing against it during the last of the
summer season, but in the new cos
TUNES one sees touches of surprising
color flaming against dark or neutral
backgrounds,
Purple seems to be extremely popu-
lar 1t predominates wherever mill
tary or dress goods are exhibited, but
in the tailored suits there are many
puppies that have no hint of the bright
or striking-deep. rich, soft shades, in
plain cloths or in tweeds and othel
mixed effects where the purple is toned
down even more by fllecks of white OF
black or gray or dark hue.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25

A MISTAKEN IDEA OF
WHAT CONSTITUTES FIN
Often Leads to the Playing of Practical Jokes
that Require Neither Brains, Originality,
Nor Talent -CIownS Raise a Laugh

for a sense of humor. To the latter cat.
egory belong those individuals who send
kilograms announcing marriages and
deaths which have not occurred, "just
to get good joke" on the recipient. And
closely related to these merry testers is
the facetious individual who rocks the
boat in stormy sea and who pulls a
chair from under his friend who is about
to sit down.
The people who o-object to the overturned
boat or to the broken limb resulting from
the sudden seat on hard floor are sup
posed to be lacking in "a sense of hu-
NOR"
There was recent departure Of a younA
man from New York on his first ocean
voyage. The traveller in question is a wit
and humorist, but to the writer's knowI-
edge he has never been known to be
cruel, tasteless, or brutal in his use of the
sense of humor. Nevertheless. it occurred
to some of his friends who mistook these
attributes for wit to send to the young
mans cabin live mice, canary birds, a
monkey, lobster-and, in fact, a taxicah
filled with things useless and troublesome
to a traveler-things which would suffer
and give discomfort and cause worry
and expense.
Herein every jester who partook in the
practical joke exhibited that lack of fine
makes the dividing line between the real
sense of humOr and the vulgar desire to
raise laugh at some ones expense.
No Wit in Meanness.
There is not one atom of wit. not one
particle of humOr, in any word or act
which causes another individual to be
inconvenienced, put to unnecessary ex-
pense, startled with causeless fear or
in, to y,A
Nor is there an evidence of a sense Of
humor, but rather of a lack of fine sensi-
bility and humanitarianism, when ami
mails are made to play painful part in
supposed jest.
1t requires no brain, no originality, no
talent to do these coarse and unkind
things. Real wit and humor are talents;
and those who possess them are a bless
ing to this world, which otherwise would
become uncomfortable with continual and
unremitting seriousness 1 have heard
a woman whose Jealous and envious ma
ture found vent in biting sarcasms speak
of her own great sense of humor; and ac-
cuse any of her acquaintances who OBJ
jected to her ridicule of lacking in that
quality which she regarded as her chief
blessing. Before you pride yourself on
possessing sense of humor. give a little
careful analysis to the quality you are
cultivating.
Any clown, any monkey, can raise a
laugh.
Any fool can rock boat and pull away
chair; any vicious mind can utter an
unkind sarcasm; any lout can send a
| false telegram; any idle mind can think
!, up a practical Joke which will cause
trouble and expense; but these things
are not witty.
Better be too serious than too vicious,
brutal, coarse, and unkind.
Unless you posses clean, spontaneous,
good-natured wit, do not pride yourself
upon your sense Of humor.
Copyright I9T1.l
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
HERALDS FREE COOKING
SCHOOL BEGINS TO-DAY
Scores of Women Have Eunced Great Interest
in the Week Which Promises a Large Au-
dience for Mrs. Armstrong; First
Lesson for; This Afternoon.

And it is a knowledge Of the fact that
nothing so pleases members of a house
hold as good cooking that will draw
a representative showing of Washington
women to these lectures, as it has else
where.
Mrs. Armstrong is one of the foremost
opponents on culinary science in this
country, and her work of assisting the
women in improving the quality of cooked
food stuffs has been a wonderful success.
The art of preparing two or three
meals day. seven days out of the week
and 365 days out of the year, and pre-
pairing them with a variety and quality
that is appetizing and wholesome is an
art that marks any woman as superior.
Strength, health, and vigor depend upon
| wholesome food, and wholesome food de-
pends upon the cook. So that the woman
who arranges her menus with intelli-
gence and cooks with a knowledge that
| lit is exactly the right way" will find
it is not only satisfying, but pleasure.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
By ELLA WHEELER WILCOX.

1t has become fashionable to talk about
having a sense of humOr, and those
satisfied people who fiaunt their proud
possession of this quality love to ridi-
Cule or pity those who they believe are
lacking it.
1t is pitiable, indeed, to be utterly
lacking in a sense of humor, and to put
literal meaning upon every phrase ut
tered in ones hearing, and to take as an
insult what is meant as pleasantly.
Two pretty young women were visiting
woman who could not understand a
ate joker, in an open and frank way.
The husband was leaving on an early
train, and the young ladies said good-by
With their goodnight. I'VE will not see
you again" they remarked, ''as you
leave so early
"Oh, yes, 1 shall surely go to your
room in the morning and kiss you good
by" the man replied. Whereupon the
wife responded quickly and seriously:
You will do nothing of the kind; you
will say your farewells now"
The same woman replied to one who
spoke of the primrose road to folly,
that she had never yet seen any prim-
roses growing about folly's path. To live
with such a matter-of-fact and literal
nature requires a similar nature, if life
is not rendered difficult and even tragic
by continual explanations.
Mistaken Idea OF HumOr.
But there are many people who mis-
take sarcasm, ridicule and even lying
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25

AS a change from the tomato sauce
usually served with Dreaded lamb chops,
try an onion sauce made in this way:
Slice two, or, if very small, three onions
and cook them in water for a few mo-
ments, and drain. Put them into just
enough boiling water to cover, add a
little salt and cook until tender Cook
together two tablespoonfuls each of -four
and butter, and when perfectly smooth
add one-hah pint OF stock, three or four
tablespoonfuls Of cream, and one salt
spoonful each of salt and sugar and a
dash of cayenne. When the onion is ten
der, press it through a colander and add
the water in which it has cooked.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
SaSSinS or Hanging
Cheeks or Chin
Iron Woman's aLagazine.l

Flabbiness of cheeks. chin or neck
has been considered very difficult to
correct. until the recent discovery of
a veritable wonder-worker for such
conditions. The preparation is so
simple and harmless any woman can
easily make and apply it. 1t is all the
more remarkable in that its beneficial
effects are apparent even after the
first application, both as to appear
ances and the feeling of comfort pro-
duced.
The formula Is: Powdered saxolite,
i o., dissolved in 1 pit. witch hazel.
Use daily as wash lotion. The solu-
tifR tends to contract and solidify the
loosened. baggy tissue. smoothing out
the folds, creases. and wrinkles be-
sides having a refining, influence on
skin of coarse texture and large pores.
AS witch hazel and saxolite can be
had at any drug store at little cost,
many will doubtless be glad to have
this successful recipe
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
When Jelly Won't Jell.

When your jelly will not jelL and that
happens to every cook at times, do not
turn it back into a saucepan to cook 1t
over; that breaks the little gelatined
globules that have formed even though
not enough to make jell. and you will
have at best a sticky. stringy mess; but
take a large dripping pan, half fill it
with water, set your undisturbed glasses
of jelI in 1t, not close enough to touch,
put into a hot oven and let them bake
till sufficiently jelled. 1t sometimes takes
three-quarters of an hour, but the jelly
will cut as smooth and clean as though
stiff enough at a first cooking.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
FASHION FANCIES NOTED
IN WASHINGTON SHOPS

The popular Sling or cordeliere bag
can easily be made at home at a small
cost. Odd pieces of silk, satin, brocade
and velvet, SUCH as can be obtained so
cheaply at the sales just now, can be
turned to good account in this way, and
either made up plainly. with a silk cord
trimming to tone, or enriched with en-
broidery in colored silks, gold and silver
thread, or incrusted with seed pearls,
beads, jet, porcelain, aluminium, secuins.
turquoises, gold and silver To make
such a bag, cut the back portion with
the flap in one piece, then cut the front
section. and after transferring the pat
tern Of the design, embroider 1t with gold
bugles, beads or sequins. Sew the bag
together on the wrong side then turn
right side out. Sew the gold embroid-
cry on, using gold thread and taking care
TO keep the corners neat and fat Cut
the lining in the same manner as the ma
terial, one portion representing the back
Of the bag and flap, the other the same
shape and size as the front section. Ma
chine together, turn right side out, and
slip the lining inside the pocket of bag,
drawing the top up to line the flap, turn
ing the edges in to meet the turned-in
edges of the material of the flap. Trim
the outside of the flap with gold en-
broidery, sew on two gold rings with rib
bon threaded through, and the bag is
completed.
A fad of early fall is to have a hat for
each gown, made of the material compos-
ing the dress. Striped and brocaded silks
are charming put to such a use, and the
only trimming necessary is a stunning
bow of black velvet ribbon. II the hat
is wide brimmed, black velvet is used as
a facing.
Shaded taffeta in two or three tones has
really become midsummer rage and the
woman Of elegance now includes several
of these pretty and useful frocks in her
wardrobe. Made in the simple, aIl-in-all
coat-frock style, fastening on the side, or
in two-piece costumes with jaunty short
coat, to be worn with exquisite. lingerie
blouses and very Frenchy jabots, they
are equally la mode.
Some Of the new buttons are marvels of
beauty and in some cases are the prin-
cipal decorative features on the gown.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25

drogen to wet the hair; add a few drops
OF ammonia. This will bleach the hair
SO that it is less conspicuous and the
ammonia gradually will kill the roots.
This treatment may have to be repeated
several times.
wild" hairs in the eyebrows can be
pulled out with tweezers and a touch OF
ammonia applied to the roots; be care
full to pull the hair the same way that it
grows, otherwise it will break off and
grow again.
The hair in the nose never should be
pulled out. but at least once week a
bit of cotton saturated with pure per
oxide of hydrogen should be placed in
the nostrils while one is dressing: this
will bleach the hair so that it will not be
noticeable.
For hair upon the face or ears the
electric needle is hest.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
S5O8

This simple frock is cut in Empire
style, with a slightly raised waistIine.
The shoulder is seamless and the sleeve
of elbow length. The two-piece skirt
closes in front en- a line with the closing
of the waist.
Cashmere, serge, Cheviot. linen, ging-
ham, lawn and other materials are suit
able for this style.
The pattern. No. sos. is cut in sizes
a. I6 and IS years. MediIR size re-
quires 5 Il yards of 36-inch rSdteHial
The above pattern can be obtained by
sending 10 cents to the Office of this
paper.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Unsalted Butter.

The woman who entertains need not
despair If she cannot buy unsalted butter
for her dainty sandwiches. The very
incest butter in the world Is made by
whipping cream which is too warm to
whip and just little sour. once heard
of a lady who make her butter in the
morning., shutting it tight in a fruit
jar with a big American Beauty rose
fresh from the florist, that her guests
might think Of roses when they ate the
buttered slices.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
LILLIAN RUSSELLS BEAUTY QUESTIONS

but the needle cannot be used on arms
nor legs, where it is often. very Objec-
tionable. good depilatory, and there
are many on theemarket. can be used and
then the parts dabbed with cold cream.
Now that it is fashionable to wear thin
silk stockings. hair on the legs is as
annoying as upon the arms.
II you only have a dark fuzz on your
arms, take enough pure peroxide of hy-
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Astringent Lotion.

Madrian-I consider witch hazel one OF
the best astringents. and it is one of the
necessities of my toilet table.
Cloths wet in hot witch hazel and
placed over the nose will reduce the pores
materially. but you must be careful to
cool the face always before going into
the air.
The formula I am sending you is one
of my best.
One and one-half ounces of witch hazel
one-half ounce of tincture of benzoin
one ounce spirits of wine. and five ounces
of orange flower water. Put the tincture
of benzoin inro an eight-ounce bottle
with the spirits of wine; add the other
ingredients previously mixed, and shake
slightly.
Apply this wash with a sponge night
and morning. This lotion not only will
correct coarse pores, but it will remedy
oilineSS of the skin.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Refusing to Dance.

Miss T.-If you have no plausible
excuse for not dancing with the young
man, you should put aside your preju-
dices and give him at least one num-
ber> If you have a serious objection to
him, you should tell him that you do
not think that you shall dance that
particular number.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25

This model can be made in an hour, as
it has no seams whatever only a short
dart under each arm. The closing is at
the center of the back at the shoulders:
the neck and armholes are very much cut
out.
Gingham, calico, cambria, &c, may be
used for aprons.
The pattern, 1880, is cut in sizes 50,
&C. 40, and "A inches bust measure. Me-
dunn size requires yards of 36-inch ma
terial.
The above pattern can be obtained by
sending 10 cents to the office of this
paper.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Farewell Party.

Florence-For your farewell party, if
you are going away on a steamer. for
instance, to Europe. you could use the
flag of the line for favors, or suit cases
and souvenir postals for place cards.
AT a tennis tea, iced tea. coffee, or CO.
Goa. sandwiches and a salad. followed
by a frozen sweet, would be acceptable.
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25

Among the most noticeable are those of
Imitation amethysts. encircled by a rim
of dull gold or silver turquoise trimmed
with fiIgree gold or Jet and lovely speci-
mems in coral usually encircled by rhine
stones
The Washington herald., 1911-09-25
Hand whitener.

Mrs. LA splendid formula to use on
the hands after washing is:
Fifteen grains of powdered borax, If
teen grains of common table salt, one
half dram of spirits of ammonia, one
dram oil of orange, two ounces of gly-
cerin, and six ounces of alcohol.