Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1911-02-14
An Unfortunate
Enconlium
By EDWARD IGLEHART
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation, 1911.

scious it breeds vanity, and vanity IS
the mother Of large brood Of troubles.
/ My wife and myself-we are both
| Vans belong to the older aristocracy
/ of New York. None of our ancestors
would have thought of associattng
with the ancestors Of persons who are
/ now in the swim and to whose circle
| we were not admitted. They care
nothing about our ancestors, though
many of them have heard of my IA
/ Their, who was a distinguished com
modOre in the navy, and my Wife's
| grandmother, who was a celebrated
New York belle. The places once oc-
cupied by these worthy people are
now filled with the descendants Of
those who sold them oysters and fish
and whose wealth runs away up into
the millions.
But my wife and l were happy IN
til certain remark was repeated to
her. One of our old family cOnnec-
tons who owns a box in the diamond
horseShoe"-sO called from being that
gallery of the Metropolitan Opera
| House occupied by the multimillion-
afres-gave us the use of it for one
night. The favor nearly caused our
ruin. Soon after that night at the
opera Gertrude's cousin, who gave US
the box, said to my wife:
THE Earl of Chapperton, recently
from London, asked me who was the
| lady in my box on Thursday night,
saying at the same time: She's the
most beautiful woman l ever saw
London could not furnish anything
equal to her|"
The remark was not only repeated to
my wife, but was talked about at ev-
cry function held by the golden set.
1t finally came to Gertrude added to
in this wise: "What a pity that Mrs.
Van Valkenburg doesn't take the pO-
stion in society that half a century
ago was occupied by her grandmother,
the beautiful Betty Van Wyke."
From that moment my dear wife got
the society bee in her bonnet. "Our
family has always kept up in the
world till the present generation" she
said I'VE have $4,000 q year, and
on that we could get on in society.
Connections of ours in the swim would
Introduce US, ard our especial associ-
ates would be Of the older aristocratic
set who are not so rich as these new
commercial people"
my dear" l Protested, tour $4,000
income would not keep us in the swim
a month"
'.l"t with your management" she
retorted, "but a woman can always
make money so further than a man
Let me try, I viii show you what
can do"
! Like fool I was persuaded. Ny
wife had no trouble in penetrating tht
| society skirmish line because of tht
! remark Of the Earl of Chapperton
which was on every ones lips. She re
/ ceived a number of invitations, bu
| found that she must make consider
able outlay for costumes before she
could accept any Of them. And since
the costumes she must rival cost al
the way from several hundred to sew
eral thousand dollars, and she mus
/ have a different costume for eacl
| function, the amount soon ran up to {
third of our total income Since ou
ordinary necessary expenditures re
quired the other tWo-thirds, it was evi
dent we would soon run upon tn,
rocks. But what is the one matter o
q woman'S costumes, expensive though
they be, compared with the THOUSAND
and one other luXuries that must b
provided by people of fashion. On
dinner alone we felt obliged to Civ
cost us $780, and it was considers
plain at that,
We permeated the outer social lin
and were making some Roadway int
the inner circle We were both disap
pointed in discovering that we must b.
civil to a number of the wives of youn
multimillionaires who had marrie
actresses, and my wife had discovers
that society was not composed of sucl
persons as her grandmother had shon
among. Then something h0ppene,
that called halt to our advance.
A certain Mrs. Van NalkenburG
whose income was some 100000
year and who was as homely as
hedge fence, caused it to be given on
for a consideration. the price bein
invitations to certain social climbers t
her soirees-that a mistake had bee
+ made in reporting Earl Chapperton'
remark as to the most beautiful won
=, an in New York. The Mrs. Van Va
kenburg referred to was the lad!
with the 100000 income.
Everybody sneered, but as all vi
derstood that to gainsay this edic
would cost them the enmity of on
of the most powerful women in Ney
York society no one dared to lis
q word to the contrary. The eaI
had returned to England and was nc
to be even questioned on the subjec
The moment his lordship's complimen
was appropriated by another my wifi
ceased to be an object of curiosit
and as she had no other claim to b
admitted to society, was dropped. BE
sides, any further attention to her wa
sure to be resented by the other Mrs
Van Valkenburg.
When the battle was over discoy
cred that we had eaten upon our CAP
ital sufficiently to reduce our incom
one-half. l was thankful that we wer
beaten off before all was exhausted.
When my wife grumbles at the halv
ing Of our income / never mention tn,
cause. have a regard for the tuft O.
hair on the top of my head.