davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
DOESN' CARE NOW
WHAT IS DONE TO
MARRIAGE LAWS
Aston Content Since He
and Miss Force
Are Wed.
CEREMONY HELD
AT BEECHWOOD
Minister Is Found Who Is Will
ing to Brave Public Opinion,
but His Action May Cost
Him His Pulpit-Sim-
plieity Marks
Wedding,
He Doesn't Care Now

"Sow TINT we ure happily mar
rIed, don't care how difficult d.
vorce and rcmnrriBge laws nre
made.
81 sympatbizc heartily with the
most strniEht-lnccd people In most
of their idcns, but believe rennr-
rlBge should he made possible once,
nn marriage IL the hnppicst condI-
ton for the individual md the COM
muntty."-Stntemen OF Colonel
John jacob .khtOr. mude imm cdIntc-
~ after his mnrringr.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
GREAT PHIL0LOGIST DEAD
Francis Andrew March Dies In Home
College Campus.

Easton, Pa, September 9.-Francir
Andrew March. LII d. L. II. D., pro.
lessor emeritus of comparative phil.
Ology and English literature at Lafa.
yette College. died to day at his home
on the college campus. He was eigI,.
ty years old. In January last he fell
and broke Il hip, since which time he
had been confined to his home
DR.. March had a world wide repu-
.ation as a philologist In his long
career as one of the leading English
scholars of the world he wrote many
books on various subjects.
In 1855 he began his career at Lafa.
yette College. He was pioneer In
the pathological study Of the English
cl6ssics. He devoted himself espe.
cially to the Anglo-Saxon language
and ranked among the foremost schol.
are in that department.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
LIVES WITH BROKEN NECK
Man Injured in Diving Able to Move
Arms.

New Rochelle, N. Y. September O.
Waldorf Miller, who broke his neck
by diving from the rocks at Hudson
Park on the night of July 8, when
he went swimming with several other
members of the Iroquois Social Club.
has hopes of recovery
1t is reported that he can move his
arms with some strength and has mo-
ton in his fingers, which were at one
time practically dead. More than
that he can move his legs slightly in a
lateral direction and can move his
toes a fraction OF an inch. Miller told
friend that he feels fine and is hav-
Ing "bully time" In the hospItal
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
COMMITTED TO ASYLUM

Haldo Mallacls Had Shot Up Street
Chr, KILLING Two People.
Pittsheld. Mass. September o.-Hav-
Ing been declared insane by a COM
mittee of experts appointed by the
superior Court, Radio Mallack. who
shot up. street car in Adams on July
2o last. killing two persons and fateI-
ly fnJuring another. was committed to-
day TO the State Hospital for tho In
sane at BridRowRtef.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
IN LEAKING CONDITION
German Steamer Returns to Port Az
ter Collision.

Especial Gable to The Times Dispatch
Hamburg. September s-The Ger
man steamer IudiksvaI. which col
lided with the Hamburg American
liner Kelserin Auguste Victoria, off
CuNhaven this morning. returned to
this port late this afternoon in a Leak
ing condition. The stem of the Hu.
diksvall was stove In and several
Plates of the ocean greyhound were
smashed. The latter vessel proceeded
10 Cherhnnr1
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
GETS 90 DAYS IN WoRKHoUsE
Ohio Man Pleads Guilty to Hitchinr
Wife to PIou.

., Lisbon /, Is Ohio: September s;-Jacob
day pleaded guilty in the Probat to
Court here to a charge of hitchine his
wife tn a pillow and beating her be-
cause she failed to pull 1t. thinner
man. sought the mercy OF the court.
but was sentenced to ninety days in
the work house
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10
s47.ao tn CalIfornIa.

September II to October IA Tourist sleep
ing cara without change Berth, 49, Wash
ltnEton-sunset Routs, tso n Main Street.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10

.econtinued on Third pase.s
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-09-10

CONTINUED ON Page Eighth
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Audubon and His Hair.

Audubon, the great naturalist, early
In his career wore his hair very long.
He wrote in his diary one day: 81
wear my hair as long as usual. ] be-
lieve it does as much for me as my
paintings" However, In 1927 his
friends succeeded in persuading him
to get his hair cit according to the pre-
vailing fashion. On March 10 Of that
year he wrote in his diary: This day
my hair sacrificed and the will Of God
usurped by the wishes Of man. AS the
barber clipped my locks rapidly 1t re-
minded me Of the horrible times OF
the French revolution when the same
operation was performed upon all the
victims murdered by the guillOtine. Ny
heart sank low" Further TO express
his grief, the margin of the page on
which this entry was made he painted
black about three-quarters OF an inch
deep all around.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
ATE A WHOLE SHEEP.
This Was Only One Of the osstronousio
Fsats of Nicholas Wood, q Fs.
nous English oIutton.

The following account Of a man
named Nicholas Wood, famed for bis
gluttony, was written by John Taylor,
the water poet" of the seventeenth
century:
Nicholas Wood was a Kentish yeO-
man. BE it known to all men to
whom these presents shall come"
writes John Taylor, ''that 1, John Tay-
loT, waterman Of st. Savior's in South
wark, will, with plain truth, bare and
threadbare, treat OF the remarkable ac-
tions of Nicholas Wood.
He hath eaten a whole sheep at one
meal: pardon me! l .link he left the
skin, the wool and bones; and present
ly after he hath swallowed three pecks
Of damSOns. Two lOins of mutton and
one lOin of veal are but three sprats
TO him. Once at Sir William st. Ledg-
er's house, so valiant and staunch OK
teeth he showed himself, that he ate
as much as would suffice thirty men,
and afterwards he slept eight hours.
Zone morning l sent for him to the
inn to eat breakfast. He had already
eaten one pottle Of milk, one pOttle Of
pOttage, and bread, butter, and cheese,
He gave me thanks and said that If he
had known any gentleman would have
invited him to breakfast he would
have spared his meal at home. Never
theless he would do me the courtesy
to show me some small cast OF his Of
fee. WhereupOn summoned the host
ess and commanded that all the VIC
tuals in the house be laid before my
guest.
''The inn was slenderly provided, but
six-penny loaves were mounted two
stories high like rampant, three six
penny veal pies, one pound Of sweet
butter, and a number OF other dishes
were set out, all of which were quickly
brought to nothing"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
WILLING TO LEND.
@Hut, Oh, My Dear. am So sorryi ny
Husband, the Mean Thing, Has
Been at My Purse Again"

Men have something to learn from
women in the art of warding on
'stouchers'' for coin. Women respond
TO such requests once in about every
thousand cases, but they are scientific
In their refusals. A Cleveland woman
with a reputation as a borrower
turned up at the home Of one Of heI
friends the other morning with a much
done over story about a persistent and
threatening dressmaker and the usual
request for the lOan-''pay it back to
morrow, certain"-Of So.
''Why, my dear, certainly" was the
pleasant response to her carefully re.
hearsed little yarn, you poor thing
you! Just wait till run upstairs and
get my purse"
She ran upstairs. The male head OF
the house happened to be In the room
where she kept her purse He saw her
dig the purse out Of a chiffonier draw.
or and deliberately remove a Wad OF
bills from it, leaving about 81 cents
In silver and copper in the change
receptacle. The man was mean enough
to lean over the stair railing when
his wife went downstairs to the par
lOr with her fattened pocketbOok II
her hand.
"Oh, Pm so sorry, dearle," he heard
her say, but 1 really thought : had
the money. 1 find, though, that Frank
as usual, has been at my purse
heard him say something about set
ting a plumbers bill last night when
] was half asleep-and the mean thing
has left me only enough for car fare
Too bad! OF course, you know, II
Dealer.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Snubbed the Composer.

Gustav Mailer had a queer expert
ence IN Munich one day for which his
name was partly responsible, His
new symphony was being rehearsed,
and he took advantage Of an hours
intermissiOn to get some fresh air.
"On returning to the building" says
a Munich paper, 'he lost his way and
tried to reach the hall through a cor
ridor in which plasterers were at work.
You cannot pass through here he was
told. But l am Mailer (Mahler is the
German for painter.) You look it,
was the unsympathetic reply Of the
man who blocked his way. We are not
ready for the painters yet, so run on.
And the composer, realizing that argu-
ment would De useless, plunged into
the labyrinth and finally reached his
destination"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
A Liaht on Mothers.

The late William James, Harvard's
famous psychologist, would often nlu-
inmate a misty subject with an apprO-
pirate anecdOte. Discussing mother
hood in a lecture on psychology, Pro
fessOr James once said:
"a teacher asked a boy this question
Ia fractions:
Suppose that your mother baked
an apple pie and there were seven OF
yOu-the parents and five children.
What part of the pie would you get
for your pOrtionY
"'A sixth, ma'am,' the boy answered.
"'But there are seven of you said
the teacher. Don't you know anything
about fractions?
"'Yes, ma'am,' said the boy. I know
all about fractions, but know Eli
about mother too. Mother d say she
didn't want no pie"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
MARITIME EXPRESSIONS.
used In a MetaphorieaI Sense They
Are Quite Common.

used In a MetaphorieaI Sense They
Are Quite Common.
Maritime expressions used metaphor
icaIly are, in fact, very common. We
say a couple are 'spliced," a young
man Is the 'mainstay'' Of his family.
an intruder puts his oar in,'' a man is
''hard up" sometimes taken abaek"
or has ''the wind taken out OF his
SAILS" a topper is 'slewed," a loafer
'1spins a yarn" sometimes ''sries the
other tack" and a ruler 'steers the
ship Of state" through troublesome
times.
This last metaphor is extremely an
ctent, by the way. Horace refers 30
Rome as ship at sea, and Plutarch
says the Delphic oracle referred TO
Athens In the same way. a Tamil
saying embOdies a like metaphor, "The
soul is the ship, reason is the helm,
the oars are the souls thoughts, and
truth is the port" An old collection
Of English proverbs contains this one:
''The tongue is the rudder Of our ship. -
A Malay maxim says, "The boat which
Is swamped at sea may be bailed out,
but the shipwreck Of the affections Is
final"
Aristophanes, Plautus and others use
an expression which comes down to
Us as an English saw, ''TO row one
way and look another" An old Eng
lish proverb (614 was, cit is not good
to have an oar in every ones boat"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
FOSTERS DYE WORKS.
FIRST PUST HOUSES.

Es4abIBShsd by Cyrus, the FoUnSSr OS
tie Persian Empire.
The drst posts are said to have orig
mated In the regular couriers estab-
nshsd by Cyrus the Great about $50
B. @, who erected post houses through
out the kingdom OF Persia. Augustus
Was the first TO introduce this instttu-
ton among the Romans, 81 B. G, and
hs was initiated by Charlemagne about
800 4. D. Louis XII was the first
sovereign 30 establish post houses In
France, owing 10 his eagerness for
nsws. and they were also the first In
stttutton OF this nature in Europe
This was IN 1870. or about 1900 years
aftsT they we're started In Persia.
! In England In the reign OF Edward
~, Q4S1) riders on post horses went
stages OF the distance OF twenty miles
from each other In order to procure
the king the earliest intelligence o< the
events that passed in the course OF the
war that had arisen with the Scots A
proclamation was issued by Charles l.
tn 1881 that. whereas to this time
there hath been no certain intercourse
between the kingdoms Of England and
Scotland, the king now commands his
postmaster Of England for foreign
parts TO settle a running post or two
between Edinburgh and London 20 81
thither and come back again IN st1
dRzzS'
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Ha Sat

1t is related Of the Rev. Matthew
Clark that in the audience was once
a young British military officer whose
scarlet uniform far outshone any rival
habiliments and so fixed the gaze Of
the young damsels present that the
wearer, enjoying the impression he
was making, not only stood through
the prayer with the rest, but remained
standing after all others had sat
down until the pastor had proceeded
for some time with his sermon, and at
length, noticing a divided attention
and its cause, the minister stopped,
laid aside his sermon and, addressing
his new hearer, said:
"Ye're a Draw (brave) lad. Ye haze
a Draw suit OF claithes, and we haze
a. seen them. Ye may sit dOun."
The lieutenant dropped as If shot
From the Autobiography of Horace
Greeley"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
CURIOUS BLUNDERS.
The Anaehronisms That Crowded {
Once Famous Poem.

The Anaehronisms That Crowded .
Once Famous Poem.
The medieval romances are full Of
blunders, making contemporaries OF
men who were separated sometimes
by hundre0H. sometimes by thousands,
Of years, but as historical criticism
had not then being and the general
information of the age was not su-
periOr in any particular to that OF the
novelist their plans do not amount 20
much from a literary point OF view.
Such an instance is the case OF AriOS-
to, who might be supposed to know
something at least OF the truth Of his
tory, but whose once famous poem,
Orlando FuriOSO," is a tissue Of his
toricsl absurdities from beginning %
end.
In this poem Charlemagne and his
peers are Joined by Edward l. Of Eng
hand, Richard, earl of Warwick; Clar-
ence and the Dukes of York and
Gloucester; cannon are employed hun
dreds Of years before the time Of
Monk Schwartz, and the MOors are
represented as established in Spain in
spite of the historic fact that 300 years
elapsed after the death of Charlie
magne before they crossed from Afri-
ca. In one place Prester John, who
lived 400 years after ChaTlemagne,
and Constantine the Great, who died
FIVE centuries before him, are intro
duced and hold familiar converse with
the great Charles, while in another
Saladin and Edward the COnfessor are
Joined by the Black Prince.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
RUBBER OYSTERS.

They Brought Trade and Saved Their
inventor From Failure.
Rubber oysters laid the foundation
OF my success" said millionaire ho-
tel man.
II had a small saloon In them days,
and things looked very black. They
looked, In fact, like bankruptcy. So
In desperation 1 cut an old rubber
doOrmat into oyster shaped pieces on
April 1 and fried them in egg and
breadcrumbs to a tasty brown.
There was only one man in the bar
when fetched in that dish Of smok-
ing rubber oysters. His eyes glittered,
and he grabbed a fork, jabbed it into
a big fellow and took a hungry bite.
"Seeing the surprised look that
spread over his face, turned away 30
hide a smile. He gave an awkward
laugh and said:
&" 'Them's fine oysters. I'll bring a
couple of the boys in to sample them
"Sure enough, he brought two
friends a half hour later. The friends
no sooner saw the appetizing rubber
oysters than, setting down their beer,
they each sunk their teeth in one.
'"They, too, sent in friends for OyS-
ters. 1 fried up no less than three old
doormats and two OvershOes that April
fool day. The whole town laughed,
and the papers printed funny stories
about my joke My joint got real
popular.
'In short, was saved-saved from
bankruptcy by rubber oysters" -
Washington Post.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
STAR GEM OF CEYLON.
The Astoria Brought Health and For.
tune to lts Wearsr, Particularly if
he Had Been Born In April.

Familiar to some of the ancient writ
ers and credited with supernatural
powers, the astoria, or star gem, was
highly valued for the benefits sup
posed to be conferred on the wearer.
Its bright six rayed star, ever chang
ing and shifting with every play of
light and especially shooting out its
flames IN the direct sunlight, would
seem to be something more than an
ordinary crystal, and to the supersti-
tiOus mind it could readily be believed
to embody some tutelar spirit.
The particular virtue attributed to
this gem was the ccnferring upon the
wearer Of health and good fortune
when worn as an amulet, and to those
fortunate to be born in the month Of
April, with which the stone was asso-
ciated or represented, the wearer was
insured from all evil.
The star stone is found principally
In Ceylon, invariably in soil peculiar
to rubies and sapphires. Indeed, it is
composed Of the same constituent ''cO-
rundum," its chatoyant, or star rays,
being caused by the pressure Of what
the natives call "silk." It is found In
many different cosors, from pale blue,
pink and white to deep dark blue, ruby
and purple. The blue are termed sap
phire stars, the red ruby stars. It is
always cut en- cabochon, the star divid-
Ing into six rays at the apex. It is
next In hardness to the diamond.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Camels In Arabia.

There are two varieties Of camels
tn use in Arabia, the dromedary and
the freight camel. The dhelul drome-
iaries are celebrated for Their easy rid
ing gait and speed. A dhelul carries
about 800 pounds and travels about
SIX miles a day. 1t can be purchased
for 100 to 80 Maria Theresa dollars
(S42.60 10 $63.75). A freight camel
carries about 500 pounds and travels
about two and half miles an hour. It
sosts 300 Maria Theresa dollars (S12D
oF more
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Misnuided Friend,

De ChaDpie-If there's any one Dui-
sance 1 hate more than another It's a
fellow who is always going around in
Producing people. There's GOOdheart,
for instance.
ROuttown-What's he been doing?
De Chappie-The idiot! The other
day he introduced me to a man owed
money TO, and I'd been owing it so
long he'd forgotten all about me. Now
I'll have to pay up or be sued--Lon-
don Telegraph.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
S4ilI MenSerina.

The deaf man got out Of the tram
car on to the other line Of rails,
Look out! There's q car coming!
cried the conductor.
''WhatP' said the deaf man
There's a car coming"
"Whatr'
Just then the car caught and knock
ed down the deaf man, and as he pick
ed himself up he said:
'T wonder what that fool kept me
there talking about!'-LOndon Mail.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Just the Opposite.

An Irishman at fair got poked in
the eye with a stick and took proceed
Ings against the offender.
Said the magistrate, "Come, now,
you don't really believe he meant to
put your eye out"
Faith, you're right this time" said
Pat, "for l believe he tried to put it
farther in."-London Tit-Bits.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
CATCHING On.

Young Mr.. Struckett-R -Ritch was eat
ing his first meal at a real restaurant
what are thOse?' he asked, point
ing at the finger bowls the waiter had
Just brought to the table.
Those are to wash your fingers in,
sir" said the waiter.
"Oh, l know that" rejoined young
Sruckett- -Ritch, with remarkable pos
session. "I mean are they cut glass p
Chicago Tribune.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Not Idle Curiosity,

Ms. WanterknOwe-I should like to
know, Mr.. W, why you are so cross
when I ask questions. Surely you
don't think l have idle curiosity?
'NGreat Scott, MOI Yours is the most
perniciously active, wide awake, sleep
less, energetic curiosity it was ever my
fate 70 encounter"
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Teachers College.

Special opportunities for teachers.
Regular college courses in psychol-
ogy, pedagogy, education, etc, with
degree of A. B.; pedagogical courses
leading to Ph. B. degree. High-grade
courses in normal training, music,
manual arts and domestic sciences.
Graduates helped to positions. Lewis
B. Moore, A. NJ, Ph. D., dean
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Moral Stimulus of Good Clothes.

Men grow in self respect as they
wear good clothes. Their clothes earn
them the approval Of their fellows.
In turn they are forced to grow to I'LL
the measure of good opinion, so that,
forced forward by the clothes he
wears, men attain to their highest
eapability.- Sartorial Art Journal
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The School of Law.

Faculty of eight Courses of three
years, giving a thorough knowledge
of theory and practice of law Occu-
pies own building opposite court
house. Benjamin F. Leighton
IL. B., dean, 42o Fifth Street, North
west.
For catalogue and special informa.
ton, address Dean of Department
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
THE SCHOOL OF MEDICINE.
Medical, Dental and Pharmaceutica
Colleges.

Forty-nine professors. Modern la
boratories and equipment Connected
with new Freedmen's Hospital, cost
ing half million dollars. Clinical IA
cilfties not surpassed in America
Postgraduate school and polyclinic
Edward A. Balloch, NJ. D., dean
Fifth and w Streets, Northwest w
c. McNeill, NJ. D., secretary, ooI R
Street, Northwest.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Betty and the KittAn.

Betty is only four and often in her
excitement she makes very odd re-
marks. The other day she cried out,
"Oh, mother, there's a dear maltins
Kitten all curdled up in the cOrnerY'
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
PROFESSIONAL SCHOOLS.
The School of Theology.

Interdenominational. Five profes-
sors. Broad and thorough courses
Advantages of connection with a great
university Students aid Low ex-
Penses, Isaac Clark, D. D., dean.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Exception.

Doesn't your husband ike cats,
Mrs. Binks?"
"NO, indeed. He hates all cats ex-
sept a little kitty they have a. his
elub."-BaltimOre American.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Musical Nn+a

A newspaper says of a recent oper-
ltic performance, The ladies. the bar
tone and the bass were good. and so
we're the ten0r's intentOnsr
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
HOWARD UNIVERSITY
WASHINGTON, D. c.
Wilbur P. Thirkield, L.. D, Presi-
dent.

Located in Capital OF the Nation
CampSs of over 20 acres. Advant-
ages unsurpassed. Modern scientific
and general equipment New Carnegie
Library. New science hall. Faculty
Of over one hundred 1882 students
from 81 States and 10 other countries
Unusual opportunities for self-sup-
port. No young man or woman OF
energy or capacity need be deprived
Of It's advantages.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
A Feat For Willie.

Willie, if you had five eggs
ID the basket and laid three on the
table, how many would you then
tive? Willie -Eight.-Life.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Academy.

Faculty OF I3. Three courses of
four years each. High-grade prepara-
tory school. George J. Cummings,
A NJ, dean.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The Commercial ColIege.

Courses in Bookkeeping, stenogra-
ply, commercial law, history, civics,
etc. Business and English high school
education combined George w
. Cook, A. NJ, dean.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
School of Manual Arts and Applied
Sciences.

Furnishes thorough courses. Six
instructors. Offers four-year courses
in mechanical and civil engineering,
and architecture
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
The College of Arts and Sciences.

Devoted to liberal studies. Courses
II English, mathematics, Latin,
Greek French, German, phy ics,
chemistry, biology, history, philoso-
ply, and the social sciences, such as
are given liz the best approved col
leges. Sixteen professors. Kelly
Miller, A. M, dean.
The Washington bee., 1911-09-09
Fosters DYE Works
FOSTERS DYE AND CLEANING
WORKS

FOSTERS DYE AND CLEANING
WORKS.
you Street, between nth and 18th
Streets, Northwest)
Business and Display Office,
nth and You Streets. Northwest
CALL AND INSPECT OUR
WORK.
Ladies suits a speciality.
Gentlemen's suits cleaned, pressed
and sponged.
Gloves cleaned.
Ali goods look like new when they
leave our works.
RlnSTER,S DIVE WORKS