The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1911-11-16
Solicitors EmpIoyer

Inc porter OF small hotel being at
lacked by illness while on duty. his
Kind employer sent him upstairs. to
bed and called physician. When the
DOCTOR came down after having attend
ed his patient the proprietor accosted
him.
We'll. doctor, how did you find him?-
he asked.
He's coming down with the grip
was the doctors reply.
II he does I'll send him back to
bed. ! warned him not to lug any
more baggage today.'-Woman's Home
Companion
Don't Read This Often,
HI mister" called the driver Of a
huge dray. will you kindly hold my
boss head for me while get DOWN."
The pedestrian hesitated.
swell, I'll do my best be observed,
approaching gingerly, though / don't
know much about horses. Er-which
one shall hold:''
'The on 'un," replied the driver.
Dear me! Poor thing!'' exclaimed
the pedestrian. do you mean this
sad looking one?"
mo, / don'tw cried the driver II
said the off 'un, didn't II"
Eyes, ! know you did," replied the
pedestrian testify. but as / wasn't at
his parents funeral how the dickens
am to guess which is the orphan?"-
London Answers.
A laird's Mistake.
Some years ago a Scotch laird found
on succeeding to his estates that the
house contained two portraits Of dis
tinguished member Of the family who
had fourished during the reign Of
George Ill, one by Reynolds and the
other by Raeburn. He knew no more
OF pictures than a Newfoundland dog,
and he decided that two portraits Of
the same individual need not be kept
The Reynolds was retained. while the
Raeburn was presented to public gal
lery. The worthy man was struck
with CONSERVATION some time after
ward when he found that his gift had
been valued at 5000 guineas, and prob
ably the picture would now fetch dou-
BILE that sum.-London Truth.
When Chocolate Was Denounced.
Strong passions were reused in the
seventeenth century among those who
thought chocolate was an invention of
the devil. A formidable treatise was
written in order to denounce the use
Of the beverage by monks The trea-
tise appeared in 1924. but the monks
saw to it. by destroying every copy
that came their way, that its circula-
don was small and brief. Chocolate
houses succeeded coffee houses in Lon
don as eenters Of a supposed greater
refinement, although Roger North de-
scribed them as centers for the benefit
Of "rooks and cullies of quality. where
gaming is added to all the rest" and
where plots against the state were
hatched by idle fellows. = London
Graphic.
He Got the Pass.
The manager OF a road show, once
playing country town, was stationed
at the front door one evening taking
tickets when a young man. presented
himself and asked for pass. simply
stating that he was the ''bellman."
What do you mean by 'bellman""
asked the manager.
We'll" came the answer, next dooi
to the opry house is a tower with
large bell, and at 8 o'clock l ring the
curfew. II / get in to the show free
I'm going to give the bell couple OF
light taps If / don't get in free
ring it to beat the cars for fifteen
minutes, and it generally breaks UP
the show"
The bellman was passed in
Gilbert and Sullivan.
Questions have often been asked as
to the real cause Of the difference be-
tween Gilbert and Sullivan at one
time, and many erroneous statements
have been made on the subject. The
truth is very simple and commonplace.
Gilbert objected to the proposal OF
Mr.. D'Oyley Carte TO include the sum
Of IL SEQ for refurnishing the front OF
the Savoy theater in the preliminary
expenses of the production OF The
Gondoliers." Sullivan did not support
him in the way he thought he should,
and for time a GOODNESS between
them resulted. II was. however, al
WAYS a matter of the greatest salts
faction to Gilbert that be and Sullivan
were the best of friends again before
the latter died-Westminster Gazette.
GiIbertian Wit.
Once Sir ". s. Gilbert was standing
in front Of his club, absentmindedly
staring out at the line Of vehicles by
the sidewalk. when a pompous men,
Der stroiled out and. without glancing
at Gilbert, said to him:
"a cah Ynr GOOD man. call me q