davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Press., 1911-04-05
The Unknown Quantity A Difficulty Overcome With the Aid of Cupid By O. HENRY Copyright, 1910. by Doubleday. Page
 & Co.

The poet Longfellow-or was it Con. fucius, the inventor of wisdom?-re- marked: ...a
 Life is real, life is earnest,
 And things are not what they seem. As mathematics are, or is-thanks, old subscriberLthe only just rule by which questions of life can be meas ured, let US by all means adjust our theme to the straight edge and the bal anced column of the great goddess Two and Two Make Four. Figures -unassailable sums in addition-shall be set over against whatever opposing element there may be.
 A mathematician after scanning the above two lines of poetry would say: "Ahem! Young gentlemen, if we as- sume that X plus-that is, that life is real-then things Gall of which life in- cludes) are real. Anything that is real the proposition that things are not what they seem,' why''-
 But this is heresy and not poesy. We woo the sweet nymph Algebra We would conduct you into the pres ence of the elusive, seductive, pursued, satisfying, mysterious X.
 Not long before the beginning of this century Septimus Kinsolving, an old New Yorker, invented an idea. He originated the discovery that bread is made from flour and not from wheat futures. Perceiving that the flour crop was short and that the stock exchange was having no perceptible effect on the growing wheat, Mir Kinsolving cornered the flour market
 The result was that when you or my landlady Cbefore the war she never had to turn her hand to anything; southerners accommodated bought a five cent loaf of bread you laid down an additional cents, which went to Mir Kinsolving as a testimonial to his l perspicacitg.
 A second result was that MT. Kin solving quit the game with $2,000,000 prof-er-rakeoff. ......-. . MT. Kinsolvings son Dan was at college when the mathematical ex- pertinent in breadstuffs was made. Dan came home during vacation and found the old gentleman in a red dressing gown reading Little Dorrit" on the porch of his estimable red brick mansion in Washington square He had retired from business with enough extra two cent pieces from bread buy CTS to reach, if laid side by side, fifteen times around the earth and lap as far as the public debt of Paraguay.
 Dan shook hands with his father and hurried over to Greenwich village to see his old high school friend, Ken witz. Dan had always admired Ken witz. Kenwitz was pale, curly haired, intense, serious, mathematical, studi- ous, altruistic, socialistic and the nat ural foe of oligarchies. Kenwitz had foregone college and was learning matchmaking in his fathers jewelry store. Dan was smiling, joyial, easy tempered and tolerant alike of kings and ragpickers. The two foregathered joyously, being opposites. And then Dan went back to college and Ken witz to his mainsprings-and to his private library in the rear of the jew elry shop.
 Four years later Dan came back to Washington square with the accumu- lations of B. A. and two years of Europe thick upon him. He took a ilial look at Septimus Kinsolving's elaborate tombstone in Greenwood and
The Press., 1911-04-05
Four Kinds of Liars.

The late Sir Frederick Bramwell wa famous both as witness and arbi- trator in engineering disputes It is re- called that his brother. the late Lord Justice Bramwell. on giving advice to a young barrister told him to be care full of four kinds of witnesses-frSt. of the liar; second, of the liar who could only be adequately described by the aid of a powerful adjective; third. of the expert witness, and. finally. of my brother Fred
The Press., 1911-04-05

Many Sufferers from nasal catarrh say they get splendid results by using an atomizer. For their benefit we prepare Ely's Liquid Cream Balm. Except that 1t is liquid it is in all respects like the healing, helpful, pain-allaying Cream Balm that the public has been familiar with for years. No cocaine nor other dangerous drug in it. The soothing spray is a remedy that relieves at once. All druggists, 75c., including spraying tube, or mailed by Ely Bros, 56 Warren Street, New York. 2
The Press., 1911-04-05
&lOO REWARD. @IOO.

The readers of this paper will be pleased to learn that there is at least one dreaded disease that science has been able to cure in all it's stages, and that is Catarrh. Halls Catarrh Cure is the only positive cure now known to the med ical fratern1ty. CataTrh being constitutional disease, requires constitutional treatment. Hall's CataFrh Cure is taken internally. acting directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces Of the system, thereby destroy ing the foundation of the disease, and giving the patient strength by building up the constitution and assisting nature in doing it's work. The proprictorS have SO much faith In it's curative powers that they Oner One Hundred Dollars for any case that 1t fails to cure. Send for list of testimonials.
 Address F. J. CHENEY q CO.,. Toledo, O.
 Sold by all Druggists, 76c
 Take HalYs Family Ptlls for constipation
The Press., 1911-04-05
THE SOUND SLEEP OF GOOD HEALTH

Can not be over-estimated, and any ail- ment that prevents it is 8 menace to health. J. l. Southers, Eau Claire, Wis, says: 'I have been unable to sleep sourdly nights, because of pains across my back and soreness of my kidneys. My appetite was very poor and my gen. eral condition was much run down. have been taking Foley's Kidney Pills but short time and now sleep as sound as a rock, my general condition is greatly improved, and know that Foley Kidney Pills have cured me-" Good results al- ways follow the use of Foley Kidney Pills.
 They are prompt corrective of urinary irregularities. Try them. A Jacobsen.
The Press., 1911-04-05

all about monopolies. and the masses. and octopuses, and the rights of labor ing people. I never thought about those things before Football and try tug to be white to my fellow man were about the extent of my college curricu- lum.
 "But since I came back and found out how dad made his money I've been thinking. I'd like awfully well to pay back those chaps who had to give up too much money for bread. I know it would buck the line of my income for a good many yards, but I'd like to make it square with 'em. Is there any way it can be done, old Ways and Means?"
 KenwttE's big black eyes glowed f1erily. His thin, intellectual face took
The Press., 1911-04-05

narrow stairway or a squalid brick tenement he led the penitent offspring of the octopus. He knocked on a door, and clear voice called to them to enter
 Tn that almost bare room a young woman sat sewing at a machine.4 She nodded to Kenwitz as to a familiar ac- Quaintance One little stream of sun light through the dingy window bur nished her heavy hair to the color of an ancient Tuscan's shield. She fash ed ripping smile at Kenwitz and a look of somewhat austered inquiry.
 Kinsolving stood regarding her clear and pathetic beauty in heart throbbing silence. Thus they came into the pres ence of the last item of the instance.
 "How many this week, Miss Mary ?'' asked the watchmaker. A mountain of coarse gray shirts lay upon the floor
 Nearly thirty dozen," said the young woman cheerfully. ''I've made al- most $4. Pm improving, MT. Kenwitz. I hardly know what to do with so much money" Her eyes turned, brightly soft, in the direction of Dan A little pink spot came out on her round, pale cheek.
 Kenwitz chuckled like a diabolic raven.
 Miss Boyne," he said, 'Flet me pre- sent MT. Kinsolving, the son of the man who put bread up five years ago. He thinks he would like to do some thing to aid those who were incon- venienced by that act"
 The smile left the young woman's face. She rose and pointed her fore finger toward the door. This time she looked Kinsolving straight in the eye, but it was not a look that gave de light.
 The two men went down into Varick street. Kenwitz, letting all his pes simism and rancor and hatred of the octopus come to the surface, gibed at the moneyed side of his friend in an acrid torrent of words. Dan appeared to be listening and then turned to Kenwitz and shook hands with him warmly.
 "Tm obliged to you, Ken, old man" he said vaguely, "a thousand times obliged.'
 ''Mein Gott! You are crazy!" cried the watchmaker, dropping his specta- cles for the first time in years.
 Two months afterward Kenwitz went into a large bakery on lower Broadway with a pair of gold trimmed eyeglasses that he had mended for the proprietor.
 A lady was giving an order to a clerk as Kenwitz passed her.
 ''These loaves are 10 cents,'' said the clerk.
 ''I always get them at cents up town" said the lady. "You need not
The Press., 1911-04-05
One Conductor Helped Back to Work.

MT Milford Adams is his name, and he writes: II was confined to my bed with chronic rheumatism and used two bottles of Foley's Kidney Remedy with good eff feet. The third bottle put me on my feet and resumed work as conductor on the Lexington, Ky, Street Railway. It will do all you claim in case of rheumatism " Foley's Kidney Remedy allays rheuma- tism by eliminating the uric acid from the blood. Specially recommended for elderly people. A. Jacobsen.
The Press., 1911-04-05
11nnhar nnhImn,h,ar.

"Paw, is there any difference be tween timber and lumberT ...
 'There is no necessary difference in kind. my Son. They differ merely in degree or stage of development. For example. a man may be spoken of as good timber for some high office and yet represent nothing but lumber when he gets there. ."--Chicago Tribune.
The Press., 1911-04-05
an. Loved Him

This was after the quarrel "I can never forgive you he cried Hast night you said was lobster /"
 'Rut you know" she replied. and her tone was conciliatory know how dearly l love lobsters."
 With a glad cry he folded her to his breast. Philadelphia Record
The Press., 1911-04-05
Worse Than Hard Words.

"Why did you kill your parrot? The poor bird meant nothing by its pro fanity."
 'T could stand it's profanity, but it learned to initiate the lawn mower last summer"- Washington Herald.
The Press., 1911-04-05
Worth Her weiaht In Butter

Curious customs still prevail with regard to marriage. In some parts of Uganda the custom is to offer six needles and pack of india rubber for a wife. Some of the Kaffirs sacrifice oxen. The Tartars of Turkestan give the weight of the prospective wife in butter. In Kamchatka the price va ries from one to ten reindeer. Some savages require a certain amount of labor. Among the aborigines it is said of matches, which prompted a Paris contemporary to speculate whether one of the French government boxes would be accepted.
The Press., 1911-04-05
Vanceamca.

"I wonder at your allowing HIx to marry your daughter. I thought you were mortal enemies"
 '9Tha1ss just the reason. Nov he will have my wife for his mother.in. law."-Exchange.
The Press., 1911-04-05
Hereditary.

Look at the way baby's working his mouth!" exclaimed Mrs. Newman. "Now he proposes to put his foot in it."
 "H'm!' replied her husband grump- fly. Hereditary. That's what l did when I proposed"
The Press., 1911-04-05
Vanity TickIed,

During the early excesses of the French revolution a rabble of men and women were rioting in the streets of Paris. Lafayette appeared and ordered a young artillery officer to open fire upon them with two cannon. The of flcer begged the general to let him try first to persuade them to withdraw.
 "It is useless to appeal to their req son." said the general.
 Certainly" answered the officer, ''and 1t is not to their reason, but to their vanity, would appeal"
 The officer rode up to the front Of the mob. doffed his cooked hat, pointed to the guns and said:
 ''Gentlenien will have the kindness to retire, for l am ordered to shoot down the rabble."
 The street was cleared at once, for none could brook the idea of being classed with the scum of the city.
 Bilious Feel heavy after dinner Tongue coated2 Bitter taste? Complex. ion sallow2 Liver needs waking up. Doan's Regulets cure bilious attacks. 25 cents as any drug store.
The Press., 1911-04-05
He Want.

Visitor-Is your clock right? Tired Hostess (at the end of her patience and politeness)-Oh no. That's the one we call the visitor Visitor-What quaint namei Why? Hostess - Because it doesn't go.
The Press., 1911-04-05
shake Into Your shoea

Aliens Foot Ease. the antiseptic powder. It relieves hot, tired, aching, swollen, sweating feet, and makes walking easy. Takes the sting out of C0rns and buniOns. Over 5000 testi- moniAls. Sold Everywhere, 26c. Don't accept any substitute. Sample FREE. Address, Allen s. Olmsted, L0 Roy, N. r.
The Press., 1911-04-05
A Reliable Remedy
 FOR
 CATARRH Ely's Cream Balm e quickly absorbed.
 Gives Relief at Once. It cleanses, soothes, heals and protects the diseased mem

brane resulting from Catarrh and drives away Cold in the Head quickly. Restores the Senses of Taste and Smell. Full size 50 cts. at Druggists or by mail. Liquid Cream Balm for use in atomizers 75 cts.
 Ely Brothers, 56 Warren Street, New York
The Press., 1911-04-05

Generally debilitated for years. Had
 sick headaches, lacked ambition, was worn-out and all run down. Burdock Blood Bitters made me a well woman" '" Mrs. Chas. Freitoy, Moosup, Conn.
The Press., 1911-04-05

fill the order. l will drive by there on my way hOme.'
 The voice was familiar. The watch maker paused.
 "Mr. Kenwitzv' cried the lady hearti- ly. "How do you doY
 Kenwitz was trying to train his sO- cialistic and economic comprehension on her wonderful fur boa and the car riage waiting outside.
 "Why. Miss Bovne!' he began.
 Mrs KinsOlving," she corrected. "Dan and I were married a month ago."
The Press., 1911-04-05
Trolley Lines
WEEK DAYS.

Ly. Stafford Springs 6.2O a. m. and ev- cry hour until 1920 p. m., arriving at Rockville on the hour. Last car to Hart ford 10.20 p. m.
 The Interurban service cars, with a change at East Hartford. leave Hartford for Stafford Springs at 6.37 a. m and ev- sry hour until 1O.37 p. m.
 Surface trolley cars leave Rockville for Hartford at 6.22 6. m. and every hour at 22 until 1922 p. m., and leave Hartford for Rockville at TOT m and every hour until 10.O7 pm. Connects for Stafford at Rockville.
 SUNDAYS.
 Lv. Stafford Springs 72O 6. m and ev- cry hour until 12.2O p. m.
The Press., 1911-04-05

Don't think that piles can't be cured. Thousands of obstinate cases have been cured by Doan's Ointment. 50 cents at any drug store,
The Press., 1911-04-05

Prejudice, which sees what it pleasea. cannot see what is plain. Aubrey de We're.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05
CHARGED WITH ASSAULT.

CHARGED WITH ASSAULT.
Charged with aggravated assault,
UrsulO Soto was arrested Wednesday
night by patrolman- Gonzales. The com
plant was made by Alexandra Benabil-
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05

and therefore are OF little OF 40 uss
IN the treatment Of disease. These
great and wonderful currents ara
sought as a last resort by thousands Of
people. many Of whom have cause to
give thanks this happy season for the
relief OF years Of agony and suffering.
When the great DR.. Lorenz came to
America and relieved sufferers BY the
mere presence OF his hand, doctors all
over the country denounced him as
humbug; so It has been with every
new invention which has proven inds-
pensabIe to suffering humanity, name
what you wiz. It IS only the great
number OF books by reputable physI-
clans on electro-thersDeutics fallen
into the hands OF educated physicians
which has saved this great discovery
from being scoffed at by them. and the
wonderful cures performed every day
which have been given Up as inourabIe
by ordinary methods.
Mrs. n. A Crockett began treatment
two weeks ago. never dreaming that a
malignant growth had begun in the
female organs which would havs re-
quired a serious surgical operation IN
less than six months. Four treatments
have dissolved It entirely, and she now
feels ike different woman.
Miss Bertha DURAN little dreamed
that a germ CTubercular) was fast
penetrating the air cells Of her lungs.
shutting Off her breath, until she could
hardly breathe; four treatments killed
every germ in her body.
Mr.. Thomas Williams never dreamed
that he had gan stones until he called
upon the doctors and saw them upon
the photographs plate and afterward
held them in his hands without cutting
or shedding one drop OF blood
Mr.. 81 NJ Johnson carried the re-
mains OF a small bug IN his ear for
five years, never thinking It remained
there until he saw It removed with the
most delicate instrument in the world.
after which he heard clock tick.
The lady physician prepares and ex-
amines all ladies desiring It. and the
great specialist IN woman's diseases
directs the work. Free examination
9 TO r. to 4. Sunday II to H. New
automobiles viii be at the service Of
out-of-town patients They VIII be
stationed at the hotel and depot for
the convenience OF the prospective pa
tients. There viii be no charge FOR
their use to any part OF the city at
any time.
office open at night on Monday.
Thursday. and Saturday. 1880 to $50
only. commencing Tuesday, October 10.
sos Herald building
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05
FORCE is
TO BE INCREASED
State of Texas Has $3,000,-
600 With Which to
Paw S1OOO0O0O

Austin. Tex, Oct. 5.-Five members
Of captain J. r. Hughes's company OF
rangers, stationed at 4sleta, III Paso
county. reached here today for the pur-
pose Of reorganizing this and other
ranger companies Captain Hughes S
company viii be mustered up TO II
men and one new company added to
the strength Of the rangers, which VIII
be 36 for the present
A detachment viii be assigned Tor
duty along the Mexican border.
The governor today appointed Non
roe FOX, Of Austin, TO be captain OF
one of the new companies.
1t is announced today that in the
event the court of criminal appeals de-
cides J F. VOTERS and W. II. Gray.
anti-pro leaders, guilty Of contempt Of
legislative investigation committees,
the cases will be appealed to the
United States supreme court under the
personal liberty clause of the federal
constitution. Argument in the CON-
tempt cases was resumed today and
will be- concluded this evening.
The state of Texas is today on verge
Of temporary bankruptcy. There Is
only 100000 in the vaults to the
credit of revenue and over 500 900
in warrants to be paid. This deficit
is expected to be declared this eve
ming. The low interest rate under the
Campbell administration is alleged as
the reason for the conditions.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05

Untold happiness was given thou
sands Of poor sufferers in London hos
pitfalls by the kindness Of sympathy
shown them on Christmas day by the
king and queen and England. The day
that the Ozona Experts sent sunshine
in many homes by curing them Of
chronic disease by the new Finsen
rays. one Of the worlds greatest dis
eoveries. The rulers OF Great Britain
have always been most interested IN
the welfare Of those who suffer the
ravages Of disease. and in line with
their benevolence is the Investigation
they are now making OF the Finsen
rays. a wonderful electric treatment
It IS the newest invention known to
science. and It has been reported that
many cures have been made in the
presence OF the king and queen
People Of FL Paso and surrounding
towns can obtain treatment with this
new Finsen apparatus right at home.
It has been purchased at great expense
by the president Of the Ozona company,
who. for years. has been in touch with
every machine for the cure OF disease.
In the costly equipped offices. 500
Herald building. may be found many
apparatuses which wiz harness thou
sands Of volts OF electricity in such a
way that it Is passed through the body
a gentle, oily flow, distributing
strength and killing disease germs.
This new current is given circulation
through the human body with all the
health-giving and disease kiIIing power
Of ozone, yet It does not touch the
muscles and does not harm the person.
A corps Of skilled physicians and sci
eutists are IN constant attendance upon
the patients, and even the inventor Of
the wonderful Finsen current IS under
contract with the company mot TO
work. but to think. Every offspring Of
this wonderful mans mind has been
purchased before it was born. This
man, a scientist who has spent his en-
tire life in perfecting the wonderful
uses Of electricity. has sacrificed both
hands and perhaps his life from burns
IN his endeavor to perfect Its admins
tratfon without harm by the operating
which at last has proved to
be a grand success. as hundreds are
treated by it daily without one particle
Of danger. Even babes OF months
old now take thousands Of volts,
enough to kill regiment OF soldiers
were not the death-dealing powers
and the life-gtTing multiplied
5000 fold. The common currents from
medical batteries contain as much OF
this harmful current as the beneficial !
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05
MINNIE AND MARTHA.

Minnie and Martha are sisters. Minnie
clerked in a dry goods store at Sc week
Martha did. too. They paid S. week
each for beard and room. With the one
dollar a week saved from their salaries,
and the courtesy of their employer in
allowing them a reduction on goods
bought in his shop, the girls managed to
dress Passably plain.
Minnie still clerks in the same store.
Martha doesn't. About six months ago
Martha became wise. She borrowed $40
and took a four months course in short
hand and typewriting at the Interna-
tional Business College. She is now
earning ST5 a month Out of last
months salary she paid back the $40
borrowed. Next month she viii start
her sister Minnie In to take course.
BIinnie's friend. clerling in the same
store has no sister to help her. She win
continue her work in the store during
the day and take a shorthand course in
our night school.
BE wise today; tbs madness to defer"
INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS
COLLEGE.
J. P. Mullin, President.
Coles Building. Phone 1147.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-10-05
PLEAD GUILTY To
SMUGGLING GHIHK5
Lemon and Passage Are
Given Nine Months
at Las Cruces

G. Lemon and Frank Passage. who
were arrested last week near Las Cruz
ces. n. NJ, by immigratio inspectors
as they were driving a wagon in which
seven smuggled Cinnamon were con-
cealed. entered a plea Of guilty to the
charge in the federal court at Las
Cruces Wednesday. They were each
sentenced 10 nine months in the jail at
Las Cruces
The capture Of Lemon and passage
is considered one of the biggest catches
Of the year by the local immigration
authorities. as the inspectors say they
have been led to believe that they have
been carrying on the smuggling or
Cinnamon into the United states for
several years
me men admitted in thar trial that
they had struggled the seven Chins1Hsa
into the United States.