The Washington times., 1911-03-24


"brown dog" statue from Battersea.
Wouldn't it be fine if some of the green
horse enormities OF Washington could
Join the pup?
BILL" Dcardon, clerk of the House
Committee on Civil Service Reform,
carries catnip liz one pocket and nuts
tl the other. All the cats and squirrels
in town know him.
Pref. Kirk, Iecturing to the Thco-
sophical Society, says that the world will
soon be SO overpOpulated that man
must migrate to other planets-in other
words, he must get off the earth.'
The Comptroller of the Treasury
rules that the members Of the Board OF
Education must pay for the taXicabs
they Use. There is TO be no JOY riding
along the road to the PieTian spring.
If the Washington policemen who
painted the station house are to forfeit
their salaries for the time thus spent,
what would be the penalty.if they had
taken few days off to paint the town?
Incorporation and a building all its
Of Commerce announces for itself. That
sounds like permanency and all the pos
sibilitics of continued effectiveness that
go with it.
Dan SulIy, whose suit against John
Hays Hammond is now engaging atten-
tion, evidently expects quite a protract-
ed season of litigation. He has decided
20 iC
of the court house.
If the Maine Monument Association
here in the District, tAkes as long to
raise the monument as it has taken TO
raise the Maine, the inscription will
have TO so into considerable detail to ex-
plain what it is all about.
The thirty thousand clerks in Wash
ingtOn extend congratulations to the
10000 rural mail carriers, who, on July l.
are, to receive a 500 b6ost in pay. They
are encouraged to hope that the next
raise will come nearer home.
A colored inmate of a local insane in
stitution who had been found guilty of
murder, saved his life by losing his
mind. Now he is about to lose his life
by recovering his mind-which might in
dicate that he is crazier than ever
The District militia officers detailed
10 make observations on the border
have no real apprehensions that there is
a practical joke concealed in the ina
neuvers,' but just the same they will
postpone their departure until. the day
after April l.
The proposition to put mail boxes on
the street cars of the District has met
with very cordial Endorsement on the
part of the people, who realize that it
would be a great convenience. The
movement should be carried forward
with all possible dispatch.
L" fsr
The New1yweds who wanted to get a
second marriage license here in Wash
ington, guaranteed to placate the wrath
of angry parents, have not succeeded
thus far. If they should discover one,
however. and get it copyrighted they
need not worry hereafter about their
daily cake. s--..
An official of the District National
Bank made a mistake of l cent in cal
culating the amount due the Govern
lnent in payment of its corporation tax.
The collector of internal revenue caught
the error, and formally requested the
remittance of the missing cent. The
District National official apologiZed, and
sent a check for cent by return mail
Although the recent theft of jeweIry
TO the value of $4,000 or $15,OOO from a
Washington home seems TO have been
the work of professional posing as a
maid" such robberies are frequently
committed by servants who are not
criminals at heart, but who succumb to
temptation in a moment of weakness.
One of the best ways for wealthy peo-
pie to keep their jewelry-and TO In
sure the honesty of their servants-is
not to leave it around the house where
it invites robbery.
Many Washingtorians who are inter-
ested in the wedding Of Lieut.. Carroll
Paul TO Miss Helen NJ. LongyeaT. Of