The Logan Republican. [volume] (Logan, Utah) 1902-1924, 1911-02-11
Mr.. II. Sucker
Writes a Letter

Writing 10 me every udy, ditnOusu vi
to this time l have not shown you the
courtesy of dropping you line &c
even ask after your health and how
the children we're getting on during
the cold spell, let alone buy the ten
shares Of stock.
want to thank you thousand
times for holding that ten shares of
stock for me. When | got your first
| letter | thought that unless ! bought
those ten shares right then and there
my chance of being an oil magnate
was gone forever But the next day
you wrote again and still gave me an
opportunity of crawling in under the
tent before the performance began
tried to pawn the cook stove that
day in order to raise the money, but
my wife interfered. | sat down and
almost wept, because | knew | would
never have such wonderful chance
again.
tiently, you once more offered me the
chance of buying those ten shares.
And so it has been through all these
months. From your letters and circu-
lars | know people are fighting like
mad in your office to get hold Of
shares in the Golden Dream, but can
see you, pale and defiant, backed up
in corner of your office, holding the
mob at bay with a shotgun and say
ing; mo, those ten shares are prom
Used to my friend. He gets them at the
original price. No man reaches those
ten shares except he walks across my
dead body"
| cannot find words to thank you.
know this is the real opportunity of
a lifetime. | already have shares in
the cit Up. Thar Mule Gold Mine"
and the Ring Around a Rosie Silver
Nine and the 20 I'm Stung Radium
Nine" but don't care anything about
my mining properties compared to the
Golden Dream oil well. The mining
companies all issued very pretty GER
tificates with big red ribbons and
great golden seals on them, and
have them framed and hung up in the
parlor. But / never could find out
where these mines were and so I've
sort of lost interest in them
You've sent me facsimiles of the
certificates of stock that you issue,
and | know your property is much
more valuable than my mines, be.
cause the certificates are at least an
inch wider and the picture at the top
is great deal prettier than ever the
one on the 20 I'm Stung Radium
Mine" certificate. You haven't said in
your letters whether your oil we'll
spouted kerosene oil, ca machine oil,
or hair oil, or olive oil, or cod liver
oil, or oil of cloves but | know it doesn't
make much difference. A million bar
rels of any kind of old oil would be
worth while.
hope it's olive oil, because then we
could tell the people that come to
the house for dinner that the olive oil
in the salad dressing was out of our
own well. On II it's hair oil it woull
be all right I'm worrying so about
that drill that I'm getting bald and
need barrel of hair oil the worst
way. 1t it's cod liver oil we can make
money starting sanitarium. People
can stand around and dip cod liver
oil right curt of our well in big tin
dippers and drink their heads off. "
it's hair oil we can start a big oar
Der shop right on the spot. do hope
| will be able to buy those ten shares
pretty soon. Meantime don't forget me
Il know you won't.
With thousand thanks for your
patience and kindness, | remain,
ALFONSO SUCKER.