Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-03-05
SHORTY HAS VIEWS
Teaching School Compared
With the Oyster Business.
NOT LIKE THE OLD DAYS
Teacher in Little Red Schoolhouse
Had Easier Times.
KEG FINNEY HIS AUDIENCE
NOT LIKE THE OLD DAYS
KEG FINNEY HIS AUDIENCE
Wonders How Keg Would Like to Be
Docked When Sick More Than
He Would Have Earned.

The bugeye Socrates cast it's stern
against the slippery piling of the
oyster wharf at the foot of 18th
street and Shorty Ferris gave his
friend. keg Finney. nudge in
the ribs as the painted name Of the
craft was displayed fully to the view
'He was a great teacher" said
Shorty. He had job as teacher
when teachin was carried on in a
schoolhouse without recoorse to tn
controller av tn Treasury. Socrates
never worried in all his life about
or not All he had to do was to teach
II dunno whether or not he taught
in wan of them little red schoolhouses
that are described in the lives of our
best Presidents He prob'ly did. Them
days was the red sandstone days of
Amurrican eddycation. All the teacher
had to do was to tell the best boy
in class to run the Amurrican flag to
the top o the pole, ring the bell. slap
her ruler on the desk and declare the
the first class in spelln' and l tell you.
Keg. them ten year-old boys could
spell all the double jinted words in
TN language when that ere old time
lcdcncI SOt TOO tedCnlu EN-.
Little Sister to Liberty.
She was a little sister to tn Cod
dess of Liberty. so to speak. She was
the main stem OF refinement in TIL
township. Ev'ry month tn school
board would put on it's double
breasted winter Prince Alberts and
hand her check, and beg her
TO stay on. cause they needed her
to keep the youngsters where they
were. She didn't have to apologize fer
Twin ev'ry time the legislator got an
economic streak. When she got sick,
some good kind ole soul TUX her a
couple o glasses of apple jelly and
some them good old-time remedies.
and what's more. they sat up with her
and told her how sorry they was, and
Ter heavens sake to get well. SO school
could go on. They prescribed medicine
ior her They don't do 1t nowadays.
Instead of feelin a teachers mise
nowadays when she's sick they run
ana take down law book and read
| up on ways and means to dock a
teacher three times as much money as
she would get if she was well and
STAYED In school fer forty, years.
'"Time was keg, when | used to know
some OF our leadin oyster men a sendin'
thcir daughters to tn normal school,
| used to think it was a great thing
ceptih lew nigh river front sports nd
get sWet headed and call a ChesapeaEe
pay select 'bivaive' jes as soon as ever
! their daughter got through tn first two
chapters of the dictionary.
Framing Laws for Teachers.
Nowadays IL you wuz to tell me YOU
Uuz morgagin' yer shad nets to send
Myrtle Gladys McWhif Finney to tn
normal school. I'd say, What you got
agin' her" Shed get a fine job at tn
end OF two years. and tn minute they
found out she was a teacher they'd. be
framin laws to keep her from dom any
thing bat wonderin' how many days they
wuZ in February.
romantic about school marin. D. yo'
know what romantic means? Nav
fought not. It's like yo' used to feel
when yod ct passel O. shad roe an
Marshall Hall wild wind and tide an d
moon big an yellow comm up ahead OF
yo' like you was headin' straight fer it.
'Yo've lost that feeiin' along wild
Sainin tn necessity for risin' at tree
every morning to wash down the deck
of lumber hauin' tug. But that was
tn way. a school marin was a fit SUBJ
| ject fer tn front page av weekly
magazine 70 don't see many 1911
| school marms on the front page any
| more. TIL pitchers school marms are
all taken from the reconstructive period.
Nowadays a teacher is teachin' her
class that thirty days make September,
April, June and November; all tn rest
| have thirty-one, ceptin' February-twen-
| ty-eight alone-when in comes a courier
| from the Treasury wild a notice sayin'
| that February has thirty days If you re
| sick and twenty-eight days If you're well,
| and that you're lucky to be alive, fer If
| you make a kick some one'll dig UP a
| decision of the Doge of Venice sayin'
! that all school teachers has to pay for
| tn privilege of holdin' a Job anyhow.
! When she gets that stuck In tn back OF
| her sweet little head and calls tn class
| in histry, she Is aware av strange
| head pearin' t'rOo tn window, countin'
| the children and making entries in a note
| book. It's nothin at all. though. Only
| an inspector av tn municipal architect
snoopin in to see IL her count of her
| class is o. X.
Drink Days for Teachers.
A s.Sha sf0nS m take dripk of xyofar