The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-07-18

attire of broadcloth, duck and Marsailles not neglecting patent leather boots, stove pipe hat, Henry Clay cigars and kid gloves.
 When Spence drove up and announced
 that he was Governor Wise, who had
 come to take the waters, twenty negroes were brought into requisition to see to
 the comfort of the illustrious guest The best quarters were assigned him, and the
 first order was to take the brown sugar out and put the white Sugar in. There
 never yet was man who could look the
 distinguished guest better than Spence. There was a lordly' air about him when
 he chose to put it on that We're de We're or Rohan could scarce have equaled. He
 sat in state, was the favored guest at
 table. and all the best drinlSables and eatables round about were his. When the landlord was at leisure he went into the room where Spence was enthroned and there they communed on all great matters of state. Spence had d vocabulary that would have put to silence all the tongues at Babel, and he whired it at the old fellow and thus confirmed him in the conviction that the sagest of all statesmen was his guest, his friend, ana under his roof.
 And so it continued for two weeks, when tramp sadder, who had worked at the. bench with Spence, came along, recognized him., and hailed him. The landlord had heard of Spence and in twinkling saw the trick of which he had
 been the victim, but all the punishment he meted was to order the white sugar out of Spenee's room, who had to make julep with brown sugar the rest of the summer. About the close of the season the landlord said to Spence: 'T want you to understand, Colonel Dabney, that you are not going to leave here .ill you pay your bil.'' That suits me exactly" was the reply, q am here for the rest of my natural life.''
 l could fill this entire newspaper
 with anecdotes of Spence Dabney. He had lived in and been a citizen of IA cities, towns, villages and hamlets in Kentucky, and everywhere he went he carried a humor and an Individuality that reversed that passage in Shakes peare: "The prosperity of an anecdote lies more in the ear of the nearer than on the tongue of the narrator" or
 words to that effect. When Spence told a story all of us were sorry that he had made an end, as Ben Jonson said of Bacon. I never saw him angry,
 but a friend of ours did, and he said it was terrible.
 Spence was what they called a com mercial drummer in those days, and he got the largest salary ever paid one
 up to the time he left the stage. Unfor- tunately-perhaps happily--he could not stand prosperity. He worked for some Jews In Cincinnati. His mission was to get the customer into the store, for he knew nothing about goods. He could tell thousand anecdotes of the Jews. He had their dialect and tn cir pioatV Rl1t he did them justice and always wound up with the words that they were the best and fairest and honestest people in the world to work for. He also said that they were the most generous peo- pie, and he was ready to worship an old Jew in Cincinnati by the name of B. Simon.
 As said. could fill this paper with anecdotes of Spence Dabney. 1 will ven- ture one, though 1t is lost in the tell ing. He one day went to the zoo and heard a man make an ora ton like this Ladies and gentlemen, 1 will now ex- hibit for your view this great female elephant Ann. She can walk so miles a day and when pushed can go 200
 Ladies, l call your attention especially to this fact--it requires more calico than is contained in any single dry goods store in the great city of Gin cinnati to make this elephant one pair of pantalettes."
 That was too much for Spence. and he roared out: That's a blank, blank lie. Pierce, Folle &- Holton have got more calico in their store than will make her whole suit!"
 But l am at the end of my paper. Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him we'll
 Horatio, a fellow of infinite jest. of most excellent fancy
 And who shall deny to me that he is in some Valhalla, along with Shakes peare and Ben Jonson, Addison and Steele. possibly with Swift and Pope certainly with Proctor Knott and Dick Wintersmith, Theodore Halam, Bill Bolts, Alec Grant and Zeb Vance.
 Washington. July 13.