The Logan Republican. [volume] (Logan, Utah) 1902-1924, 1911-03-23
THE THINKING
GERMAN
BY SARAH BAXTER
Copyright by American Press Asso-
citation. 1911.
BY SARAH BAXTER

Being woman with no children and
not content with the occupation house
keeping alone gave me, ! decided to 60
into the business of raising squads for
market. Having ample room In my
back yard, erected dovecotes there
and put in dozen pairs Of pigeons.
About the time began to think Of sell
ing my surplus on counting my young
birds missed several of them. There
was leak somewhere.
Behind our place, facing on another
road, was shanty I'm which lived
German cobbler named Hans Schrei'
Der. One night, hearing noise in my
back yard, went out with dark
lantern and flashed 1t on Schneider get
ting over the back fence. He was
warned that the next time he was
caught in our yard he would be prose
cuted under the law. He put on a
great deal Of injured innocence, but
continued to steal my squads. Finally
l caught him again, had him arrested
and the next morning appeared against
/ him in court
"Jutch," he said to the court, assum-
| ing the expression of a martyr, ~ leaf
II to you wedder poor man like me
can affort to eat squap. How woult
I know I like squap II don't know
how dey taste. got to puy 'em first,
hafn't I, to know wedder l like 'emY'
"That's very ingenious argument,
Hans" said the prosecutor, taking up
! the case, "but It won't work. Did you
never taste any kind Of game-duck,
quail, snipe?'
"Neffer. Do you take me for shen-
tleman?"
you've eaten young chickens,
haven't your
"Proilersl You think l can affort to
eat proilersr All T. proilers go into
t houses of shentlemen like you. Pc
sites, ven t proilers are two years
olt dom like EN-"
"How can broiler be two years
old?" asked the prosecutor. IT should
consi.er chicken two years old n
pretty aged bird"
~ proiler not pc two years olt!
H'ml Yo' go to t colt storage house.
Yo' flint 'em tree, four, fife years olt"
Were not trying the cold storage
men," said the prosecutor. Were
trying you. Hans Schneider, for steal
Ing Mrs. Perkins squads. What did
you eat for breakfast this morning?'
Sausage"
= Anything else?"
"Breat und coffee"
"Are you sure you didn't eat SQUAD p
, Sure"
"Hans, did you ever hear Of Herr
Roentgen?"
"No."
HE discovered process by which
one may look inside the body and see
what's there
/. Hans looked uneasy.
Now I'm going" continued the pros
ecutor, ito use one of these machines
! to look inside your stomach, and If
find SQUAD there his honor will sent
$ you up for long term. IL you vii
y confess I'll ask him to let you off will
r small flne-just enough to pay fo
a the birds you have stolen. Now, vii
I, you submit TO the test or confessT
wat is L principle of t machine?
asked Schneider.
|. "The principle Is that peculiar ligh
=. called the Roentgen ray Eliminates
\ mans inside and shows what Is there.
The prisoner thought awhile. the
said:
l. 81 like { see how dat Is done. Yo
q show me vat you hat for breakfast di
sr morning, und tell you what do
I. Come. come" said the lawyer sterI
p. ly, enough of this Send for tn
= machine"
He whispered to an attendant to 4
N to an optician near by and bring
'e certain instrument he designated
IL When II arrived the German looked {
II with much interest. 1t consisted {
RI. two brass cylinders. with glasses {
an each end. mounted ON an upright
= "Now, Hans" said the attorney, "b
:, fore applying the test I'll give you OF
vi more chance. VIII you confessr'
as Hans hesitated The instinct of /
at yestigation indigenous with his RAJ
m struggled with his fear of detectio
ly At last he said:
ri. "If you flint the squap in my stor
or ach how long for 20 TO shailT'
-. The lawyer looked at the judge, WI
-" was watching this new method OF tri
III much amused.
lp- Thirty days" said his honor
no 81 risk IT," said Hans. Look In
ri my stomach"
ed 81 withdraw the charge" ! sal
,er coming TO the lawyers rescue.
Az IN, charge is withdrawn" said {
Judge. struggling to repress laught'
" Prisoner, II another such charge
III made against you and you are prov
'ht guilty III send you up for six months
ME 81 wants to see" said the prison,
in wat vent truth my stomach dis MOI
en-. ing"
al. THAT'S not necessary now" 81
=, the prosecutor, "since the charge h
been withdrawn and his honor has
'"' missed the case"