The Washington herald., 1911-07-16

ITl In' door OF an nm, a man extended
IL III nus hand, and, naturally SUPP osng
- han to be porter the traveller Of.
-, tered him his valisC.
Inc man stcppcd back tossed his head and
irownCd, sCOUmiu'ly.
DO you take me for portcr?" hc de-
mandcd. 81 would have YOU understand that
| am no porter"
,.. lndccd!' said the Traveller. apologcticaIIy.
ih"n, may ask, senior, what are yuu?"
&lmsl"
During strike on railway. much diff
tuIty was experienced in finding engineers to
Keep the necessary trains running. One of
the substitutes, II young fellow, ran some dis
tahce pasi Il station, and then, putting back
ran rs much too far the other way He was
preparing to make third attempt when the
station agent shouted, to the great amusc-
mcnt OF the passengers, Never mind Bob;
stay where you are. Wen shift the station
Here is good story of a dog, which has
the further merit Of being true. An Irish
retriever, which had been taught to bring
ms masters Shippers when required was one
day expelled from the room when visitors
were calling, as he was making himself rather
troublesome. The dog, feeling himself in dis
grace, IN order to prOpitiate his master. went
to every bedroom in the house and collected
all the slippers and old shoes he could find
Eh'rh he deposited outside the parlor door
''''
when the door was opened for the partnp
visitors and this scene was revealed to view
Prolonged railway travelling is so tcdious
10 most people that any little diversion is
welcomed An incident Of this sort was the
absent minded performance of an elderly lady
on through train. The day was warm and
8h" was seized with thirst. SO the lady went
I" the water cooler. took the cup in her hand
turned tn, faucet and stood waiting Thn
Ic" water filed the catch pan, and ran over.
and soon was cooling the crosstirs Still the
woman stood holding the empty cup Final
~ tIaInlnan stepped up to her and said no
I,rN M&Iam' 90 you know, what you are
DONG! "Me? Certainly | do" "But Won
ar" running off all the water" 'Whv," said
she" calmly, Il am letting it run until it gets
nearby passengers brought her to her senses
ana she shut the faucet with a snap. and re-
turned to hrr seat without taking a drink.
t"ngr"ssmCn sometimes adopt queer exno.
dIrntS to gain the good will of their con.
sutuGnts. ears ago member from a West
Crn state was afraid that his first term would
i,I,nnif h% ms laSt as he had not managed to make
d,mtng what he should do, a friend said
=, on live near the centre of the I,nitni
States dout you?" "Ycs." "Then "TThr ",,%T HSy
don you introduce bill to have the capital
,oI tn, 20 - To- lnr principal town in your dis
trrlt The Congressman introduced the bin.
"nd the p""pI" OF his district at once con.
GHI"d he was great man and sent him
IMIN. Tor another term. He rcntroducrd the
l'I IN tn" next Congress, and. although il
WITS promptly pigcon-holcd in committee his
'"nStIlu"niS gave him third term. as n re.
ward for his genius
\ case Of what might be called cruelty TO $
ANIMALS J" reported from Indianapolis A /
'llN gentl,m took notion to raise chick
r1nS. SO hc purchased an incubator, several
n"h1rrd I eggs and some full-bIoodcd Plymouth :
halrhcd; the lady of the house boiled eggs
lmd made hash for them to eat. In the mean, il
me one ot the Plymouth Rock hens had a
p''h gwen setting of choice eggs, but at
~" allotted time no chickens appeared The t.
Gentleman was rather jubilant because the II
hrunator had proved its superiority over the s.
laturai mother, when the lady discovered il
hnt she had given the hen boiled eggs 10 g
lairh. Then, instead of feeling remorsC she $
'ot mad, and compelled the poor hen To set l.
mother three wceks-on fresh eggs this timc a
.owCver. '''"''
Sometime. a small boy can draw fine dis y,
melton. Two fishermen of the sportsman {
ypc, equipped with all the latest apnIiam%"s t.
or angling, were walking a mountain road
when they met a barefootcd boy, with - in al
AN IN hls hand and carricssk.trimmcJ It
fhncl oi tree sung over his shoulder u
Going fshing?" ''' ''''" ca
"No," druwed the youngstcr, with only
lance at the splendid outfits, "T amt roin; ,Ii
s"n Ih just goin' down to the crick to y
of
II