davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02
EpERTINENT' POINTS.

- s,G-- - 'lTs.St z u Ss
Nearly anything % man gets In WIN
ter Is called grip *
Many a latesta1ng sutton has had
q call from above.
4 1nltry,ng 70 he independent many
persons are impoli,a r
Many husbands pen checks tlis
wife's extravaganza: FL Z.
Il Not all Of the dark things OF life
come to pass at night.
q Poverty overtakes many man even;
when he lives a.iast life.
Some mouths are the ssmok
Ing vents Of their minds.
Sarcasm Is disolyent Of Friendship
and a cement Of renmities.
q Perhaps Lots wife was trying il
become a pillar In thetharch.
Some girls ripen3 into womartooc
and some are plucked green.
Long points. whether on lead pen.
ellis or argument, break easily.
Business success is not often bull
on foundation OF gold bricks.
When mans stomach is uppish, hi,
countenance is usually downcast.
The woman who is ashamed OF he,
ageusually has good reason for It. 4
The policy of2the educator is to
conserve possible sites Of: will power!
There are about seven milton Fiji
plnos inhabiting 800 different islands
Warped consciences.i like ,shrunke,
window frames, Keep the stoXers busy
Manufacturers are doing theiii|
best this year to elevate the shoe
Ones reputation and credit are llslt
ally the best when not pat to thu
test. "
Strange TO say. It requires no ar
tistlc ability whatever to draw q pen
sion. Az y Fl.
Many a man has squeezed his wa:
out ofaa tight place in his love at
fairs. II
It is qritc possible to break a man,
head without anything. coming GU
Of it. =
Why IS It that wife's taste j.
often in in scoltliet With her husband
mite?
a''T'f d. s.
And strangely enough. many a. mar:
has beenSlong on cash after hc ha.
cashcd in! '
There is always, someone. who Il.
willing 70 try to fan social ,smudg.
into a flame. as
Itis'not always the man. who pay,
the smost5for apew that most needt
the sermons. 4S
II women would let. contracts To-,
their painting 1t would, not SO. Otter
be over done.
I Courtesy lis not, unusual In marrIee
life 1t issonly recognition OF it.'thH
is; EXCEPTIONAL = !.Ss.
/ The principal use that the ilay,
man has: for his legs Is to aid him I:
lodging, work. ts Y = y. I
L 4 -. HF. ~. IS u
" 1t occasionally happens, Of otrse
that q good man goes WRONG By;: turn.
ing TO the?risRt. ! ~ y
Construe should be- accentcdjioa:
the first syllable,'when some; Of your
courts construe the law:
~ 4 g. ,,.sIt - ------;;'5 ~ .t1s..F' y ~
Possibly 1t Ii, because 50 many hus.
bands are tight wads that SO many
dresses are tightly; wadded. ~
A young mans suit always present,
the best appearance to young woman
after he has pressed 1t a little.
The woman who continually ,harrz,
OH one subject has much in commo i!
with the Musician who Knows only!
one selection.
IT may be SditilcMlt to teach an, Old
dog new tricks, but that Is no easc1t
why all of the .new. dogs should bas
taught the old:trlcks! 1
Abdication! Isl the process throug !,
Which aiding. goesswhen he! surrender |
1T, 4 49, II
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

IA Philadelphia policeman tried ITO
get gay with al goat the other day
and the goat chased hin, up o tree
and kept him there until Its ownsfl
came along and took IT home. y
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

The woman who is ashamed OF he,
ago usually has good reason for It.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Is IN enc Of the big jewc;ry stores IL
Maiden Lane. there is a man who rents
desk room and niakes2 q business ol
winding clocks, for wealthy New YORK.
familtess He has wound the clucts in;
cne house in upper Fifth avenue fer
,l5syears. and now. though the family.
Is abroad, he goes regularly every
eight days and keeps the timepisces
going. Il
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02
GlEANIMGs AND GOSSIP.

An Ohio man wants d divorce be-
cause his wife went away on u yislt3
and left him to do the cooking for
10 hired men. g...!sl 4s. is 5as
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Subscribe for \ the vast .ginisn;
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

The policy OF the educator is to
conserve possible sites of:will power!
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

l y III ths wlI'sst vitshlan:
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

There are about seven million Fiji
plnos inhabiting 800 different islands
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Warpe1 consciences. like ,shrnnke,
Ndndowiframes. Keep the stoXers busy
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

A couple q men iii Ohio have In,
vented q new paper for printing
ographs and ills said that IT
swill olutlonize the business 1t Is
ilnderatooa that they have sold their!
patent Tor 1850 1000. &.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Z a professor In California says that
certain sounds express colors What
color do The letters !. OF U. express
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Want advertising has buyer and
|iseileF sastng good morning at each
j j5s rlghs assay I. 4
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

IA number o. people In Boston are
trying to form a poets club and say
that the initiation fee Is only SO.
Who ever heard OF a real poet who
had q bowling acquaintance with / a
$40 Sbilif H "A I. ,s;S T., 4 Z
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

When a mans stomach is suppish hi
countenance is usually downcast.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Manufacturers are doing theii'
best this year to elevate the shoe
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Ones reputation and credit are us!t
ally the best when not pat to thu
test. ]
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

FRESH ouNTRl SUITE Ii AND
EGGS Al.RAYst 30. i. BR ,sNEN,s;
Gro GER 4sos MAIN STR EET.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

The Kcun chi-chu Che Rar de.
partmenp has serta a memorial to
the throne that orders may be- given
to. the offlcils and indiyiduls Of tho
whole empire to adopt the dresses Of
foreign style by wearing short jack
cts: A private imperial rescript has
been issued to the board Of cereno.
MICS In the same day instructinsi
them 70 deliberate upon this question:
and memorabilia to this effect
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

The pan who. makes the, most f,lss
over hisSloye'of bis country is usually
one who feels that he Is especially
called upon TO! serve it--att 50 muci,
per year: s. "A
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02
Some girls ripen3 into womanhooc
and some are plucked green.

Long points. whether on lead pen
ellis or argument, break. easily. q
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

The Paris street. With the longest.
name Is La Rue des Pretres-saiht-s
Germain-I .Auxerrols. III ( Brussels Is
I; La Rlie DC iagAtontatsue- Aux-H erbes-j
Potagres The Belgian 4 metropolis
has a suburb bearing the name On:
geschuperdezilyetco kkerno ljestriaett. q
Holland eellpsesi these with Alblasser-;
amlnerland areno INST ckersy rgaderin-
s1okaat which signtffes S,,,the meeting
room 81 the street lamp lighters OIL
2Aibasserd damn + III
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

Abdication Isl the process throus,
which aking. goes when he! sufrendet }
his thrones and tfat through wticht a
woman goes after she marries.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

! Strange to say, It requires no ar
tistlc ability whatever to draw 4 pen
sion. ~ 49,,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1911-02-02

IT may je diffcalt 10 teach an d, 4
dog new tricks, but that Is no. reasc1i
why all of THE new dogs should ba}
taught the old: tricks! S3s $a
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Pounds Travel Fund
For Teachers Benefit

A generous Frenchman. Albert Kahn.
Of Paris. has founded in America an en-
dowment fund which provides the privi-
lege of foreign travel for teachers in
our higher schools and professors In our
colleges. While a preference is ex-
pressed for teachers in our higher in
stitutions of learning as beneficaries
Of the fund, yet the trustees are di-
rected by the founder 10 cnoOse teach
ers and professors in isolated Southern
and Western institutions rather than
the richer schools and colleges OF the
land
One at a time would seem TO be the
rule, since the annual income In s.. 800
and the traveller IL expected 10 remain
at least one year abroad. But in moth
ing, perhaps. does 80 much depend upon
the individual as in the iIem of travel
ing expense, and many hard student
would be glad enough 10 share this sum
with another and yet be able to return
home at the end Of twelve months with
money in his pocket.
There are scores of able teachers in
struggling institutes that have mas
tered the art of making one dollar do
the work of two. The trustees who are
to make the selection or selections from
year to year are Edward D. Adams,
Nicholas Murray Butler, Charles w.
Eliot, Henry Fairchild Osborn, and
Charles d. Walcott.
The scheme Is received with all the
greater confidence because. while new
In America, 1t Is old and we'll establish
ed elsewhere, Mr.. Kahn having already
founded similar funds in France, Ger
many, Japan. and England.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
New Way to Cure
The Balky Horse

The incorrigibIe balky horses Of the
rural districts find their way TO whole
sale markets, where under the test OF
hauling a heavy truck wagon on a
paved street with the wheels blocked
the vice is Immediately discovered
II the animal has been sold as serv-
icably sound and guaranteed a willing
worker and a cheerful puller the buyer
reects his purchase, and the horse Is
resold without any guarantee except
clear title of ownership.
Some horses have learned to balk by
being overloaded and abused. Their
courage has been overtaxed. and they
rebel disheartened at the task they are
asked to perform. Other horses appear
to balk from natural inclination, and
appear foaled full of innate stubborn
ness.
Baking, like windsucking, Cribbing.
weaving, and halter pulling, is a vice
developed by natural inheritance. In
breaking young horses to harness too
much caution cannot be observed IN
asking the youngster to pull light loads
to begin with.
The baIky horse cannot be conquered
by brutal treatment, but may be IN
duced to pull by many devices intended
to attract attention from mis- resolution
not to pull. To lift the forefoot and
pound on the shoe. to put handful OF
grass or dirt in his mouth, to give him
a lump of sugar or an apple to eat
have all proved successful in some in
stances in inducing horse to pull.
To pass a cord around the pastern
and pull the forefoot forward until the
animal has to move is also means OF
starting a balky horse. An electric bat
terry manipulated by the driver gives
an animal shock from source that
he does not comprehend and is the
latest device in treating incorrigible
horses-Horse Shoers' Journal.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Bit Critical, But
SO Was His Wife

They are telling this story about an
Adelbert professor, who prides himself
on the correctness Of his English.
C'They" let 1t be noted, refers to GER
tain Western reserve students. But the
murder of the kings speech will out)
My dear" said this professors wife
a few morning ago, cant I give you
a fresh cup of Coffee"
You doubtless mean a cup of fresh
coffee" corrected the professor Par
don me- nv dear, but these vulgar er-
rors in rhetoric are easily corrected if
we give attention to them. Thank you
the coffee is excellent. BY the way. my
dear. that picture on the east wall would
show to better advantage II you'd hang
il over the clock"
All" replied Mrs. Professor, quietly.
you doubtless mean II I were to hang
II above the clock. OF course, you
know that If l were to hang it over
the clock. we should not be able to tell
the time. AS 1t is. I can see that you
have only three minutes in which to
finish your coffee and get to YOUR ghet-
oric class."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Probabilities.
Entries for Today's
Racing at Latonia

First race-Six furlongs Louis Reil,
lC3; Bob Co, 104; Lo Sa ia, 103; Bad News.
II, ITO; Mark Anthony II, 115; Orphan
Lad, los; Covendon, los; JEFF Bernstein,
los; Howla, los; Vanden, 10S; Peter Pen
der, los; Ben Double, Ill.
Second race-Six furlongs. Sir Blaise,
lO6; The Reach, 1O6; Lewis, 107; Free
Lance, los: Mack B. Eubanks. 1Os;
Among, lis.
Third race-Mile and seventy yards.
Edna Collins, 100, Syzygy, 100; Emma
Stuart 100; Port Arlington, 102; Chemul-
po, 103; Southern Light, 106; Henry Wal
bank, los; Butterball, los: Exemplar,
los; Ben Pryor, 105; Irish Lad, los;
Husky Lad, 1OS.
Fourth race-One and one-sixteenth
miles. Mockler, 80; Princess Galway,
1O3; kornak, 103; Bell Horse. lG3; Fire
man, los; Leamence, 100; Star Chamber,
100; Polls. 1o9; Prince Gal, 1l9.
Fifth race-Six furlongs. Swananoa.
100; County Tax, 1o3; Hazel Burke, 104;
Helene, 10i; Labold, los; White Wool,
10Y; Walter Welles, 105: Captain Car
mody, los; Star O'Ryan. 109: Adams Ex-
press, 109; Judge Monck, 100.
Sixth race-One and one-eighth miles.
Beach Sand. 80; Sweet Owen, 80; Bad
News II, 93; Dutch Rock, 81; Long
Hand, 102; Ida May, 1o5; John Reardon,
105; Romp, 106; Joe Morris, 107; Stone
street, 10; Superstition, Ill.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Uncle Henry Long
On Getting News

Robert said Uncle Henry. who
was visiting his city nephew, who 8
that man In the house on the other
side of the street? He stands in front
of his window and shaves himself ev-
cry morning He's done II now for
three days runnin'.'
And he's probably done it for the
last ten years, for all I know. uncle"
replied Robert, in a tone that lacked
interest.
Has he lived there all that time?"
Yes; and longer than that. 1 sup
pose. He was there when I came here
ten years ago"
Who is he?''
II don't know"
What does he do?"
Il haven't the slightest idea. uncle"
Whereupon Uncle Henry put on HIS
hat and went out. In about fifteen min
utes he was back in the house again.
Robert he said, that chaps name
Is Findlater. He runs an insurance Of
fee on Benton street. He's worth prob
ably s26. 900, owns that house, belongs
10 the Methodist church, has three boys.
one girl. is a widower. tifty-one years
old. a member of the Masonic order.
has a farm on Long Island. and is en-
gagged to his stenographer. I believe
living in the city has made you stupid
about getting information. Youth s
ComDanion.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
When the Fan Mixes
Baseball and Love

The baseball fan was feeling senti-
mental. The game was over, and the
sun had set and the moon had risen,
and now the fan was with his lady love,
trying to hand her few hot ones.
II feel" he remarked. en- passant (he
got his stuff from a summer novel;,
that with you to cheer me on. l could
er-" (here he lost his lines and had
to faket, that I could grab off any
pennant the big league was Offering"
Let me get you right" interrupted
the lady You want me to sit in the
bleachers and yell while you line 'em
out, eh?''
That's the DOPE" he answered, rather
surprised that she got his knightly idea
so RAPIDLY. She was to cheer him on to
victory, and a glance up to where her
dear eyes were shining-well. you get
It.
IF that's the case" continued the
fair dame, 1.-The grounds will have-to
be laid off in a little better shape So
far 1 haven't been able to see the dia-
mond."
He lwised up and was there with the
spark the next night And the game
wasn't called off on account of dark
ness. believe us.-Boston Traveller.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Pounds a College
With Strange Fortune

The following story from the Persian
manuscript of which a translation has
been published under the title, The
Glory of the Shia World" reads like
a passage in the Ara bian Nights" 1t
tells of a Persian at Meshed who had
founded a college with wealth gained
In a remarkable manner.
"One day a rich merchant asked him
whether he was willing to work at a
place to which he would be conducted
blindfolded. Being a fearless Kerma-
nj and -ery poor, he agreed. and was
led through many streets to a court
yard, where the bandage was removed,
and he was ordered to dig a hole and
bury gold coins and jewelry. This
he did 70 several days, and, being
searched before he left, he saw no
chance of bettering his condition.
However one day he saw a cat,
which he killed and ripped open. He
then sewed up some money and jewels
inside it and threw 1t over the wall.
After this, when his work was done,
he wandered about until he found the
cat and not only secured the money
hidden in its body, but also learned
the position of the house.
Its owner shortly afterward died,
and the astute Kermani bought his
house with the gold sewed up inside the
cat AS the merchant had never reveal
ed his secret to anyone he became his
heir and, in turn, when dying. bequeath-
his money for the pious task Of found
ing and maintaining a college.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Has Strict Law to
Govern Painters

Belgium has just drawn up a special
code of laws governing painters and the
exercise Of their craft which are singu-
larly strict and exhaustive.
From the fashion in which the new
laws hedge them in with enforced pre-
cautions one would think painting the
most dangerous trade in the whole Cata-
Iogue. In the first place. no employer
of painters may employ a man who
drinks alcoholic beverages to the tenn
porary extinction Of his logical power.
and no intoxicating liquors are TO be
brought into the vicinity of the workers.
Employers are responsible for the care
which their men take of their persons.
They must see that every painter
washes his hands before eating, suspend
the men whose health is not satisfac-
tory, and discharge any one suffering
from lead poisoning. A painter may not
wear the same clothes on the street or
in his home which he uses in his trade.
He is imperativeIy required to arm him
self with special suit OF clothes and
screened hat.
Contractors and master painters are
restricted in the use of white lead TO the
ground lead mixed with oil, and 1t is
handled that il does not splash or come
in contact with the painters hands.
The law strictly forbids scraping of
dry painted surfaces in which white
lead has been used. This will doubtless
prevent much carelessness and protect
the careless painter from his own indis-
cretion, but it is terribly restrictive and
smacks of overlegislation. - Chicago
Tribune.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Montreal Racing
Entries for Today

First raCe-Six furlongs. Coal Shoot,
1C4; Tender, l02; Glade, 107; Brendemor,
10; Daniel O'Grady, 80; Miss Rex, 112;
Bronte, 1l0; Rubiola, ia.
Second race-Six furlongs. May Bride.
ll2; Standiver, 1O7; Films, l07: Premier.
ia; Congo, los.
Third race-One mile. Sam Bernard,
u2; New Star, "a; Glenn Beachey, lis;
GreCtan Bend, '110; Mazonia, no.
Fourth race-Three-year-old and up
ward; one mile. Warden, 112; Henry
Crosscaddin, III; Flarney, ITO; Hickory
Stick, Ill; Complete, 10; Horace E. 1l2;
Peep Over, l06; Oberon. liz; Doctor
Young. 112.
Fifth race-Four and a half furlongs
Sally Savage, ia; Forester, 106; Isabel
Casse, 1O6; oGodacre, Ill; Alarmed, 1G.
Sixth race-Four and a half furlongs
Donovan, Ill; Haymarket Ill: Quincy
Rcll. Sc; Bodkin. 1G3; Creuse, 1c9; Ynca,
101; Brown Tony, ia; Tom Shaw. ia.
Seventh race--Four and half fur
longs. Susan, 1O1: Miss Cardigan, lo4
Carissima, lOl; Donaldo, 80: Fleming,
Ill; Bonnie Bee. 1O9; AIlowmaise. ia.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Sons Drink Blow
To Ardent Worker

Bale p Waggener once led a tenn
perance crusade at Atchison. The cam
paign wound up with a big meeting at
the opera house. On the afternoon pre-
vfous to the meeting Bales son. VIII,
who was then in his teens. had been in
the suburbs with a crowd of fellows and
took a glass of beer
That night at the meeting. Bale. who
was presiding. went through the usual
stunt Of all evangelists by asking people
to answer certain questions by raising
their hands.
How many of you have taken drink
of beer today" he asked.
Just one hand went up. 1t was that
of his son VIII.
Bale was greatly Inundated. In fact,
he was almost paralyzed for the mo-
ment Finally he recovered his wits and
gave his son a severe lecture. After
the meeting was over Bale said: My
son, you have disgraced me-"
"Oh. l don't know" said Will. "One
of those crusaders, acting as your dis
ciple, was with me and drank also. He
not only drank, but he lied about it
tonight
That may be true. my son" said
Bale. but please refrain from drink
ing any more beer while l am conduct
ing this crusade. 1t might further en-
barrass me."-Kansas City Journal.
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Woman's Hair Is Her
Glory and Undoing

1T is strange and often funny to men
to see what hard times most women
have at all seasons with their hair
said an observiantryoung man. Go whee
you will wherever the fair sex are to be
seen, and you will notice that the most
troublesome part of a woman's toilet is
her hair. All other feminine adorn-
ments. save this special one. are SEEM
ingly arranged with more or less salts
factory results, but d neat, orderly and
lasting arrangement Of the hair is some
thing that the most tidy and resourceful
woman cannot, apparently, maintain
long:
What thinking man is there any
where whose attention Is not eternally
drawn to this distressing situation? A
woman may painstakingly fix her hair
in the fashion that she believes Is most
becoming and shortly afterward hair
pin or some other equally treacherous
device gives way and conSpireS to make
her look-well, untidy.
So as women sit and walk in and
out of doors their chief trouble is their
hair and they are forever seen reaching
for their front or back hair and Catch-
ing short or long struggling locks as II
to assure themselves whether their halr
is coming partly or wholly down. And
the worst of 1t all is that fellow mar
ried or single, who happens to be near
a woman who is thus engaged (and
where will you escape emp is apt to
carry away some blond, auburn, or bru-
nette memento that will completely undo
him in the eyes Of another girl.
Now, as this trouble directly or indi-
rectly affects both sexes, I'm going to
suggest to some up-to-date hairdresser
when 1 meet her, some device-say a
barely invisible net that will complete
ly hold each particular female hair,
real or artificial, and. in short, keep a
woman's locks where they belong.
And the speaker, after disdainfully pick
ing a long, stray auburn hair off his
coat, went on his way.-New York
Press
The Washington times., 1911-07-12
Was Too Particular on
Dream Visit to Queen

Lord Talbot Demalahide was talking
in New York. says the Milwaukee News,
about the thoroughness of the customs
investiga tons.
The smuggler," he said. lis bound to
be detected II he tries his little game in
yOur metropolis. The smusglers pre-.
cautions against detection at this port
are as vain and ludicrous as the pre-
cautions of the dreaming Irishman.
An Irishman, you know. once
dreamed that he was visiting the late
Queen Victoria.
4" WIN you have a drink? the Queen
~ will said the Irisbfnan. "A drop
of Irish, of course, hot by preference,
your majesty
so the Queen put on the kettle. but
wher the water boiled the noise awoGe
the dreamer. =.
st. Patrick" said he. ri take it
cold next time "