davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
THE M1sANrupopE

THE M1SANTHROPE Life seems to him a weary way And hardly worth his while, Because he mopes day afler day And seldom wears a smile. However blue ;hp s.Sies raal be. However bright the sun, He will not or he can not sec His plaint is never done. The bird that warbles on a bough. The sweetest garden rose, Fair innocence with tranquil brow. But add unto his woes. No mirth, no laughter brimming free. No kindliness at all Methinks. a thrice-mocked fool is he, When soon the gloomy pail Will fold his quiet limbs around And end his brief career. Before his groping heart has found How much of life is cheer.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
Pure Food and Drugs

Between Secretary of Agriculture Wilson, who thinks benzoate of soda is good enough for the "hoi polloi," and the supreme court, which makes legal false labels on patent medicines the pure food and drugs act of 1906 is being whittled into insignificance. The supreme court says the patent medicine people cannot under that act make misstatements about the in gredients of their compounds while they make misstatements without limit concerning their alleged cura- tive properties. The latter mislead ignorant people, and the supreme court reads into the act of 1906 the right in patent medicine proprietors to make claim to all sorts of curative properties.
 There is but one remedy against all this business. Congress should amend the act of 1906 until it affords the general public the protection origin ally intended. It is not easy to cir cumvent secretary of agriculture who has an eye single to manufac- turers of canned goods and no eye at all to the stomachs of the people. The task is not easy but for the sake of the many it should be attempted. The pure food and drugs act should be vindicated by making it as effec- tual as the legislators of 1906 intend ed it should be.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
REFLECTIONS OF A BAcHELoR

From the New York Press.
 Charity hath no charity to let the giver off lightly.
 There's nothing man can be prouder of than that his wife let's him buy his own ties.
 4 man thinks q girl believes everything he tells her: She knows he believes every thing she tells him.
 Hand organs in the street are much sweeter music than pianos in the next fiat, because they move on.
 The most suspicious creature breath ing the breath of human life is q man with an umbrella at a public welfare meeting.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

countenance stopped on thA sidewalk t1 chat with friend of hers fwho was sit ting on the veranda of Birmingham res. idence.
 Has Mrs. B. quit the club?" asked the hawk-eyed one.
 'Yes." said the other woman. Her hus- band made her.
 The woman with ideas sniffed with such vigor that the little birdies in trees there- about forgot to sing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
wH1sTLER's PoRTRAIr OF CARLYLE

Whistler"
 While living at Chelsea Whistler had Carlyle as near neighbor, and of, his own motion he painted the portrait that now hangs in Glasgow. These two extra ordinary beings were quite congenal. The dogmatic old philosopher, then past 15, sat day after day to the eccentric paint CT, who was nearly 40 years his junior, as patiently as if he were professional model and the sittings were long and tedious As. the portrait neared comple- ton, Carlyle took good look at it one day, seemed pleased and said:
 "Weel, man, you have given me clean collar, and that is more than Meester Watts has done"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
Purchase of the Sabel Home

In four weeks time the governor of Alabama will be housed in a 15- room structure built of brick and stone and containing handsome fur nishings and appointments" Wherein "appointments" differ from furnish
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
THE WIREGRAssIAN.

The Wiregrassan, published by the stu dents of the Geneva County High school, Is credit to that institution and shows a lively interest on the part of the young people who have it in charge. The Wire grassian is published bi-monthly and com pares favorably with the best school and college magazines of the state. The board or editors and managers is as follows:
 Business managers, James M. Davison. Jr., Rhett l.. Williamson, J. Marvin Met caif. Society: Bessie l.. Golf. H. G. 1ilier, J. Alto Ward. Music: Miss Melrose Greene. Atheletics, Robert Ward. Jokes: J. Hart Russell Advisory: IT. H. Holmes. A. l.. Young. Social: Rosalle Rivenbarl
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
A SAD AWAKENING.

A SAD A w How pleasing the ads. of the summer re- sorts are. When cursory reading presents them to view But painful reflections and plenteous shorts are
 Our portion when finding these claims are not true. The cuisine extolled there as really delectr able
 Turns out to be largely a matter of prunes: Although the landlord Is extremely re- spectable, We can not help thinking he's played us for looms.
 A Low-BROwED LISTENER. "A St. Louis paper publishes an edi- torial on What the Orchestra Means |" "1'd like to read 1t. There are times when the orchestra keeps me guessing"
 CAN'T LIVE ON KISSES. Tn the Spring a young mans fancy Lightly turns to thoughts of love-" Though he knows but slender chance he Has to feed turtle dove.
 Birmingham Age-Herald. Marriage sometimes makes him dizzy With the troubles that increase; And he finds it keeps him busy Nourishing the dove of peace.
 Youngstown Telegram.
 NO TRUE SUFFRAGETTE. The lady with the determined cast of
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
MATERIALLY SPEAKING
the Smart Set Magazin'

From the Smart Set Magazine.
 Guest-That's a superb statue in the drawing room.
 Host-Yes. it's fine piece of work whats it made out of. bronze or cop per?"
 "I made that out of cotton"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
sEEKING ExPLANATIoN.

In vain the bard doth WOO the muses,
 And inspiration cometh not. Ii may be cause much thought confuses It may be cause the weathers hot.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
BRIGHAM YoUNG's DREAMS.

SIT CidiicS Oilhe liooo).
 Brigham's personal position is strange one. He calls himself prophet. and de- clares that he has revelations from God himself; but when you ask him quietly what all this means, you will find that for prophet you must read political philo- pher. He sees that a canal from Utah Lake to Salt Lake valley would be of vast utility to the church and people that a new settlement is urgently re- quired He thinks about these things till they dominate in his mind and take in his brain the shape of physical creations He dreams of the canal the city: sees them before him in his waking moments. That which is so clearly for the good of Gods people, becomes Gods will Next Sunday at the Tabernacle he steps to the front and says:
 God has spoken; he has said unto his prophet Get thee up, Brigham, and build me a city in the fertile valley to the south, where there is water where there are fish, where the sun is strong enough to ripen the cotton plants. and give raj ment as we'll as food to my saints on earth Brethern willing to aid Gods work should come to me before the bish- ops meeting"
 As the prophet takes his seat again and puts on his broad brimmed hat, a hum of applause runs around, and teams and barrows are freely promised. Sometimes the canals, the bridge, the city may prove failure-but this is not concealed: the prophets human tongue may blunder even | Il
 After all.' Brigham said to me one day. the highest inspiration is good senes the knowing what to do and how to do it." Brigham's head is that of a man who nowhere could be second.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The poet laureate is not to be permitted to read his coronation ode before the King. Kings cannot stand everything, even after Sandow training.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
CHANGE OF KEY

From Christian Register.
 What carrot-headed little urchin is that, madam?' Why he is my youngest son. You don't say so. What a dear, little. sweet dove-cyed cherubl"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
THE "PIrGn Ar unM

He never wears. an anxious look When he goes put to fire the cook. Is such a famous pugilist,
 He knows quite well she won't resist. She may vituperate, 'tis true, But that's what he's accustomed to.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
st. yjncent,. Ho.pitnI

A large crowd will doubtless attend the dedication of the new wing of St. Vincent's this afternoon. The Sisters of Charity opened a hospital here In the '90s They occupied the DeBardeleben mansion and conducted q hospital there which proved to be a great boon to this district. 1t was not long before
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
Regard.ng Prohibition

T understand that an election in this county on the question of wet or dry will be held in October" said a prominent business man. Tt is we'll to defer it until the middle of the fall. because great mer months, and taking plenty of time gives those interested in the question an opportunity to check up. Mobile, Mont gomery and Birmingham are almost sure to have saloons again. But the saloons will be limited in number and will be strictly regulated.
 T count myself a temperance man. While I am not a total abstaner, l drink nothing stronger than beer, and never was inside of a saloon a dozen times in my life. But prohibition in large cities is a farce, and the sooner we vote it out here the better for decency and morals. I myself would be glad to see the dispensary instead of saloons, but I find the sentiment of business men and many others is largely in favor of the latter.
 For some time after the statewide en- actlnent went into effect the cities of the
  wide open. There were spasmodic ef- forts at enforcement of the law, but the blind tigers were in evidence all the while. Here in Birmingham the city com mission put the lid on tight, and while there is less of the blind tiger evil to- day can there was a month ago, still there is enough of it to disgust all level headed people with prohibition laws in cities the size of Birmingham When Jefferson county gave a large majority against the liquor traffic in 1907, many of my friends who voted dry then are now pronounced in their expressions against the anti-saloon propaganda. When the vote is taken in October the majority for liquor will be as great, think, as it was against it four years ago.
 q have been a voter a long time since 1S72-and have taken an active part in politics most of my life. I have wit messed many campaigns in which excit- ing issues were dominant. but I do moi recall anything in politics that has caused SO much bitterness and turbulence al radical prohibition. And all wise mer saw from the start that the pendulum would swing back. A reaction was sure to set in, and it will be long time be fore professional agitators will be abl' again to make the majority of voters 1T poplous county with a large city for its capital take a fanatical view of thing: and act accordingly
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Mexico prefers to conduct its presi- dential election by the revolution ropte. The trouble is, Mexico is not a republic No Latin-American country is. They don't know how.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Justice Harlan talks plainly to his asso- ciates of the supreme court and. they can not send him to jail for contempt cf court.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

In Lincoln, Nebraska, .the mayors cab inet contains one woman. This is an in- novation that Birmingham, always pro- gressiVe. has not tried
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
PROPOSALS IN FICTION

ter of an old cistern. Whereupon he makes this dissertation to Paula:
 Were you to die, I should love you and know you were near. This is love above Flesh and Death-the old mysti- flying Interchangeable. This happiness is the triumph over death. It is reve- lation, mighty adoring-not a mere woman In my arms, but an ineffable is- sue of eternity. A woman, but more Love and Labor and Life and the Great Good that Drives the World. This Is the happiness 1 have and hold today: Though you died 1 should know that you lived and were mine."
 Do you get that about the ''mystifying Interchangeables'' and the 'ineffable is- sue of eternityf'? Anyhow. Paula did though how she knew there in the dark that all those impressive words were to be spelled with capitals isn't explained.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

New York statesmen rarely fill the places assigned them by their political advance agents. No New York man is prominent today in the presidential race on either side.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
Find. Bushes. satisfactory

T find no cause to complain of busi- ness" said B. E. Burton, manager of the Cable Piano company. "Our business has been good right along Within the past few days I have visited Decatur and Huntsville, and have found those cities very prosperous indeed. At De- catur the Louisville and Nashville rail- road shops are being operated six days in the week, and that naturally enlivens the community.
 When the piano trade Is good the bus mess situation generally is satisfactory. Our sales and collections throughout Ala bama certainly indicate that the peo- pie are well ahead in this worlds goods. There is a great deal of thrift in the agricultural sections, and the present fine crop outlook is exceptionally cheering. Everything points to record-breaking crops this year.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Daz has been kicked out of the house that he set in order and maintained handsomely. His orly crime was stand pattism.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The Dlaz resignation came at last No official lets go of power willingly, tnd bloodshed did not. caHnt iQ piaz-s mind' It least,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
CAN STAND ANyrHING.

'Pipps has a remarkable constitution" What makes you think so?"
 "On one of the hottest days we've had recently he read an essay entitled The Ideal Man !"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Mexico is coming along without the aid of inc awful General Reyes. who is off eially held up at Havana.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
HIGHLY PROFITABLE.

Every time Billy" Sunday saves great many souls he seems to get a great deal of money. We are not at all surprised to hear that he intends to keep on saving souls indefinitely.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

There is no meat in commercial mince- meat and the public begins 10 Wonoer what there is in it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Up north they declare that the time to pick straw hats and electric fans mas fully come.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
SEEMS OPPRESSIVE.

Kansas has taken to liquor made of water, prune juice, ginger and fishberries. The effects of this mixture upon the hu- mar system are said to be astonishingly succsssful, causing mild-eyed farmer to resemble a cyclone crossed with A grizzly bear, or Bengal tiger two days late for dinner. As usual, the govern ment, which always tries to prevent Kan sas from enjoying itself, has prohibited the sale of fishberry ne.=Chicago Ex- aminer.
 HIS UBTIMATUM.
 Remarked a fan,
 ''I will not laugh Until we get
 pitching staff"
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Madero trusts his fellow Mexicans, but he never trusted Diaz, who once put him in jail
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

On the old adage. Handsome is as hand some does. New Jersey is claiming thae she has the handsomest governor.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Arizona may decline to recall her re- call. She knows her judges better than we do.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

No man knows or ever will know "reasona ble" restraint of trade.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The Moors have killed British con sul. and John Bull is believing in earnest.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The jackpot will not again publicly serve in politics. Hereafter it will gum shoe.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The list of dead aeroplanists now mum bers 5S.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Ohio should make dog fennel a state flower, for she grows it in every county
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

The lumber trust declares it is reason able" and the country demands 10 De shown.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Americans are now engaged in dodging 7SO, coo automobiles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31
FOR rNDREss LIBRARIES

Even in New York they are beginning to take 'em off.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

NO TRUE SUFFRAGETTE. The lady with the determined cast. of
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala, postoffice as second-class matter under act of Congress March 8. 1879,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-05-31

On the old adage, Handsome is as hand some does. New Jersey is claiming tha she has the handsomest governor. The Dlaz resignation came at last. NC official lets go of power willingly, tnd bloodshed did not. ca1nt in piaz-s mtnd' 1t least.
 Mexico is coming along without the aid of the awful General Reyes. who is off eially held up at Havana.
 rhor. is no meat in commercial mlnce- meat and the public begins to wonder what there is in it.
 ---s.------ Up north they declare that the time to nick straw hats and electric fans has fully come.
 Arizona may decline to recall her re- call. She knows her judges better than we do.
  The lumber trust declares it is reason able" and the country demands to be shown.
 The jackpot will not again publicly serve in politics. Hereafter it will gum shoe.
 Ohio should make dog fennel state flower, for she grows it in every county. The Moors have killed a British con- sul. and John Bull is believing in earnest. No man knows or ever will know "reasona ble" restraint of trade. Americans are now engaged in dodging 7S0 coo automobiles.
  Even in New York they are pesihhlhs to take 'em off.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-21
WILL HEAR APPLICATION
FOR REDUCTION OF BAIL
[gpecial 10 The rimca.Dianatchl

ISpSCIaI W ne -DlSpatCn.l
Lynchburg. Va, November so
Judge Henry Clay Mcdowell. of tho
Federal District Court, upon ,applica-
ton OF Caskie & Caskie. counsel for
George E. huffman. the alleged mall
robber, fixed Tuesday. December 6 as
the time TO hear the application for n
reduction of bail. This means that
Huffman will have to remain in tho
city jail at least until that date.
Commissioner O'Brien fixed the bail
bond at $4,000 at the time Huffman
waived preliminary hearing. and the
defense concluded that this was ex-
cessive. The matter was brought this
morning to the attention of Judge Nc
Dowell. who agreed TO hear the mo-
ton on the date indicated.
II is understood that the defense
VIII erdeavor TO have the bond re-
duced to $4,000. and II this is success
full, IL Is said, Huffman's relatives Will
have no trouble furnishing surety
satisfactory to the court for that
amount
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-21
SUPREME COURT
WILL MEET TO-DAY
Appeals From Thirteenth Dis,
trict Will Be Argued-Char-
tiers by State.

Raleigh. \. c., November 2o.-Ths
FIRST appeal to DO called BY the Su.
preme Court for argument tomorrow
when the Thirteenth District cases are
called Will be State rs. Gouge, from
Mitchell county, In which tho appellan,
is under sentence OF twenty months
imprisonment for frauduientiy chang
ing the totals OF the tax books of Nit
chell county, with a view to cheating
the county out of $4,000 In the settle
ment of the county commissioners with
the sheriff OF the court for the taxes
for the year. Gouge was Office deputy
for the sheriff. and was convicted OF
going into the Office OF tho register OF
deeds and making the changes OF the
totals on the tax books. The appeal
is based on allegations OF defec, in
tle bill OF indictment. and admission OF
incompetent evidence
a charter was issued to-day for the
Hunter Drug Company. Warrenton. n.
C., capital $4,000 by W. A Burwell
and others. for general drug business.
II is estimated hereabouts that II
viii be December i before all the cot
ton is picked in Wake and adjacent
counties. Much of the cotton still in
the fields Is deteriorating rapidly now.
The Carolina Title Insurance Com
pany, Wilmington, was licensed to-day
by Commissioner ]. r. Young. of the
State Insurance Department, TO do
business in North Carolina The cor
poration was only organized the past
few days. w. B. Cooper being elected
president. This Is the SECOND corpora
ton of the kind formed in this State
for the insurance of titles to real es-
tate The first was formed at Ashe-
Vile q couple OF years ago, and is do
ing well.
ha Eve 20
insurance companies that had during
1910 Sl.i5S,S5l premium receipts; ST.
7i2,1l5 total income; paid s347,642 to
policy holders during the year; total
assets, {3.es5.3s3; new policies for the
year, 1920; amounting to Sl2.565,477.
They hao at the end of the year. $4,000
policies in force. amounting 10 $4z.507,-
395. the gain in policies for the year
being SS.5+s. amounting to s6,39o.345.
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-21

church extension, addressed the body.
and statement OF interest made by
him was: we arc building hve
churches week every week In the
year"
brotherhood Elects omcers.
The conference took recess. and
the Virginia Conference brotherhood
held an annual meeting. The omcerz
elected for tho ensuing year are:
Pr.sident. DIR. b. +. Lipscomb Vice
President. DR.. IL +. Johnson; secre-
tary. Rev &. J. Bettcn. Assistant Sec
retury. Rev. r. r. Reeves. Membership
Secretary. Rev. John W. Eure; Trus-
tee. Or. James Cannon.
The conference was again called to
order and L collection was taken for
Rev. a s. J. Rice. who on account
OF failure OF health. was placed OF the
superannuatcd list. the sum of {635
being contributed TO help him.
The report OF the board OF educa-
tion wac read. and DR.. 5. c. Hatcher
spoke to the report and read teIe-
gram from, Colonel J. Z. Branch an
nouncing his gift.
DR.. II. Z. Blackwell also epoke to
the body DR.. Cannon made an address
on the Southern Assembly at Waynes-
Vile. y. C., outlining the plan OF or
ganization. Rev T. 7. Dacsnun and
others offered resolutions. Endorsing
DR. Cannon.
Rev. n. Beckham. chairman of
the Joint board OF finance. announced
that the church had raised enough to
pay an excess OF 80 l-3 per cent. on
the appropriations for superannuated
preachers This statement was greeted
with applause and qualification. as IT
greatly relieved the necessities of
those dependent on the fund.
The board laid an assessment Of
The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1911-11-21
AN OLD REMEDY
FOR BLOOD POISON

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has been curing Contagious Blood
Poison in all its forms and stages,
and IS today, as it has always bee:.:,
the safest as we'll as most reliable
remedy for this disease. One reason
why S. S. S. is so successful in curing
Blood Poison is that it strengthens
and builds up the stomach and diges-
tive members while eradicating the
poison from the blood. The greatest
OF all reasons however is because this
medicine possesses just the proper
ingredients, blended and compounded
in such scientific proportion, as to
make it the most perfect blood puri-
fer ever placed upon the market.
S. S. S. is made entirely of roots, herbs
and barks, and in addition to it's value
rs remedy, is the one blood nedi-
cine which may be used without any
bad effect, no matter how delicate the
system. Not a particle of strong
mineral or other harmful drug enters
into its composition, and you can
take it assured that it will cure YOU
and at the same time build up your
system. S. S. S. cures permanently
and perfectly, removing every symp-
tom OF the trouble by natures true
way-reInoving the inward cause.
Get 5. 5. s. at your drug store and
then write for our Home Treatment
book which is free and of great assist.
ance to every sufferer of this disease.
THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO.. Atlanta. Go.