Perth Amboy evening news., 1911-06-16

Hades-but I'm going to risk telling
you-the friends of 1911.
Gerald Barnes.-Gerald. our mu-
sician, the idealist whom we consid-
cred no less than a second Emerson,
was perfectly happy in the prosatc
existence of a Jersey farmer, a part
ner to Skeen-he of the flowing
locks and the inspired BROWN
1865, a round, jolly old bachelor.
Yes, a bachelor, eel though we
all know that Skeen once thought
quite seriously of Margin CMa-
rian) Nora and Betty Brown, the
heavenly twins, organized a refuge
for heart-broken spinsters and It's
said-thoHgh in secret-that Mar
guerite and Dutch G~oldberger, in
utter desperation, finally betoO]I
themselves hither. No more walk
ing home from church for you, Mar
guerite; no spooning on senior
strawrides for you-DOrOthea nor
hiding stolen chocolates in a lark
ened laboratory with the class
presi-well-we won't tell who, but
we know!
agnes Brown.-Agnes, the mis-
chievous incorrigible, Brownie
breaker of hearts-was grown into a
perfectly charming old lady, with a
curl and a cat, and a cup of tea,
while there still paid court to her
cold indifference, Hans, Russ and
Kenneth. Who would ever dream
that these rheumatic old bachelors
ever ran in a victorious relay team?
But Esther, Clara and Dora
known well to us all for their inces-
SAINT chatter and hilarious gaiety-
captured poor, unfortunate hus-
bands-innocent youth Harry Wal
lace and Fritz" O'Brien-and sub
tected them to the cruel wrath OF
their ever-wagging tongues.
/, Far, far off, in a secluded valley,
was a retreat for maidens who, un-
able to bear the strife and conflict OF
this noisy world, lived In peace and
solitude. Here were Lilly, Molly
and Sara. Pluto toll dine this morn
ing that Imp the messenger by which
he summons mortals to Hades, had a
wounded wing. I knew right away
that when he'd attempted to capture
Molly and Sara they'd started an ar
gument-just like those We used to
have at class meetings. My good
ness; but weren't they exciting.
Molly'd want one thing, Sara
would want another, and then we'd
talk and talk and talk, until the pres
ident appeased our ruf1ed heads or
Janitor Zellers poked his head
around the corner and shouted,
Well, if you're going to stay all
night, don't forget to lock the win
dows.' But 1t wasn't that, after all,
for while he was lowering above
earth-Wilson and Seamen ran into
him with their biplane, and plunged
him into a little vaudeville theatre
way down in Perth Amboy, N. J.,
where Polensky and Pfeiffer, noted
tenor sOloists, were billed. And they
certainly used to practice hard at
school. We could always hear them
above all the rest when we sang page
IS, F o r s a k e n, F o a k e n.
am T.. That Is, when Mr.. William.
son didn't sing. On the same bill
were four native Hindoo dancers
who turned out to be May, Grace,
Edith and Mary! And they started
out to be perfectly digniied school
ma'ams.'
when the Imp came through the
roof, Ruth HegstrOm, a powerful
cOntralto, was just singing, I want
someone to flirt with me- While
Earl Mullins answered to her plea:
Amy little girl that's a nice little
girl. is the right little girl for me-.
OF course, when the Imp came tum-
bling in. it created quite a nm
ton, but he said there was one tall,
thin. man in the audience that slept
right through it all. I knew right
away that 1t was Doc Benish. III
wager he's asleep now-Oh, Doc
(nO response)-I knew 1t! Co.
ing down Broadway next morning
Imp saw Eleanor Meade starring as
The Slim Princess and Tressa
eager as Lady Macbeth Tresa
made a wonderful actress because of
her utter disregard for nervousness.
How queer It seems to us who al
ways knew Tressa going around with
a Bennets Latin grammar in one
hand and a Virgil's 'Aeneid' in the
other. Her knees trembling and her
teeth chattering for fear of our ener-
getic professor.
Nellie Bardrum.-When Pluto
overlook Nellie she was travelling as
the fat lady with Frank Robbins cir
Gus. I'm sure we all remember how
large Nellie was at school, And
Lydia Oksen-our worthy secretary
became a clOckmaker, because, YOU
see, she had all the minutes of Ch)
our class meetings to work with.
And here's X. Herbert. She be-
came a lecturer on the benefits of
life with Nature. How that reminds
me of the time I saw two girls
tramping along Market street about
four o'clock one morning. One was
calm and cool, that was K, used to
taking constitutionals; the other was
pulling away with jerky breaths.