davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
Doctors Versus LAWYERS.

Most lawyers take a keen delight
trying to confuse medical experts
in the witness box in murder trials,
and often they get paid back in
their own coin. A case is recalled
where the lawyer, after exercising
all the tangling tactics without ef-
feet, looked quizzically at the doc
tor who was testifying and said:
You will admit that doctors
sometimes make mistakes, won't
you?"
'Oh, yes; the same as lawyers, -
was the cool reply.
And doctors mistakes are
buried six feet under ground" was
the lawyers triumphant reply.
YES" he replied, land the law.
yers' mistakes often swing in the
air."-Philadelphia Public Ledger.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

rS- I . ~ q "a,
to 70 under the automobile with him:
but she says since she's a widow she
never goes anywhere alone with: one
man. Uncle and Miss Clara Emily
came in just then, and, the effect was
paralyzing. Uncle turned red. and
poor Miss Clara Emily nearly sank to
the floor. Mrs. Whalen advanced to-
ward them as if she were q general
leading cavalry charge afoot, and
said: "Well, so the old folks have
been out summing themselves!" Did
you ever hear of anything more cruel?
Miss Clara Emily looked blue with
rage, and said she must go to Clara,
and Mrs. Whalen said: John, come
with me-" and took uncle of behind
some palms, and Lee and I went away
so as not to be anywhere when he
came out.
We didn't come back until nearly
six, and Lee said he supposed we'd
find uncle and Mr.. Peters learning to
play "old maid;" but when we cane
in uncle was reading a New York
paper about a month old and Mrs.
Whalen had gone out with Scott Nc
Carthy to buy Clara hot-water bag.
is. She asked if you approved of
Lee, and when told her that you did,
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

st. MalO.
Dearest Mamma: We are all here
together again except the Brewers and
the two Trips and Ellsworth Grimm.
1t is very jolly, only I am so worried
over uncle and Miss Clara Emily.
Even Mr.. Peters cannot keep them
apart. Lee took Mr.. Peters to his
room and talked to him seriously, and
offered to make uncle still more worth
his while; but Mr.. Peters has been
agreeable so long that he doesn't do
1t well any more. He just looks silly,
and Lee says if he was us he'd let
uncle go rip. But of course Lee isn't
us, and I know that he can't be ex-
pected to know just how we feel. If
Uncle John marries Miss Clara Emily
l know no one is going to like it at
all.
We went to Mont-Saint-Michel, and
every one but uncle went up, and he
went seven flights up-he says 20, but
don't believe that there are more
than 16 or II in all. We were ahead
and never knew that he had stopped
being behind, and it was SO interest
ing on top that forgot had an un-
Gle. There are beautiful halls and
cloisters, and then one goes down
through all sorts of horrors while the
guide tells who lived five years in this
hole and who lived IL years under
those steps. You get to have such a
contempt for people who were in
prison only one or two years over
here-as if they ought to be ashamed
Of only having been in such a short
time. There is a ghostly, CHASTITY mu-
scum in nt-Saint-Michel where the
visitors walk through an unlighted
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

luH. "ACl 11cIAy VI CAC wv
themselves out of their hammocks
unusually early in order to dress
the ship with holiday greens ere
the sun IS up.
Usually the gibes for the OFF,
GERS are reserved for the mlnstre!
show in the evening, but there
have been occasions in the history
of the navy when the bluejackets
played decidedly practical jokes on
their superiors in connection with
the Christmas dinner. For In
stance, at Shanghai, China, few
years ago, delegation of the en-
listed men got ashore almost as
soon as the ship dropped anchor In
port, and having forestalled the
wearers of gold braid they proceed
ed to corner" the limited market
of turkeys. Thus they had plenti-
full slices of the light and dark
meat at their spread, while the
ward-room mess had to put up with
not altogether satisfactory sub
stitute The high prices paid for
fowl on this occasion constitute
but one of many illustrations that
might be cited to prove how lavish
are the bluejackets in their expen-
ditures when it comes to providing
ammunition for the proper observ-
ance Of Christmas.
The mischievous nature OF these
boys grown tall crops out in the
character of many of the contests
that take place on Christmas after
noon. There are boxing, wrestling
and fencing contests that are in
deadly earnest, but there are also
such merriment makers as egg
races, potato races, three-legged
races, sack races, ETC., and finally
there are ludicrous pie-eating con.
tests and similar stunts. A time
honored Christmas prank aboard
Yankee fighting ships is that
wherein a procession of fantastic
ally CARRIED sailors visits the cap
tain's quarters, carrying a bucket
of whitewash, and petitions the
commanding officer to literally or
figuratively wipe out all scores or
dement's standing against members
of the crew for minor attractions
of the rules. If the master of the
craft is not utterly lacking in that
tact and discernment which makes
for popularity in the navy, he hast
ems to take cOgnizance of the spir-
It of the day by granting this re-
quest for universal clemency.
The opportunities for enjoyment
open to our American bluejackets
at Christmas have been materially
enhanced by the present policy of
having the warships. whenever
possible spend the holidays in
some populous port. For instance,
the plan, at this writing, is to have
the big battleship fleet spend
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
Costly Street Lemonade.

A West side man whose youngest
child attempted to blow himself up
on the Fourth of July has just settled
a peculiar claim for damages. The
child's clothes caught fire in the
street, and he was saved from serious
injury by the nimble wit of a man
who soused him into a convenient bar.
rel of liquid. A week later the ia.
ther got bill for $40, which repre-
scented the cost Of a barrel of ruined
lemonade into which the youngster
had been plunged. The father was
willing to pay several times $40 for
the preservation of his son, but to
place that valuation on a barrel of
street lemonade struck him az q bit
of unconscious but delightful SATIRE
New York Sun.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
A Street In Auray.

she said then she had nothing to say
Lee introduced her to Mr.. Peters and
she sent him straight to bed and had
them poultice his chest and mustard.
plaster his back, for she says his cold
may run into anything. took her up
to Clara, and she sent out for sweet
oil, and stopped the china straw, and
set her to gargling. She says it's aw'
full the amount she finds to do every
where she goes, and she was in .
train accident before she came to the
steamer, and you ought to hear how
she chopped people OUT The shade
Miss Clara Emily was upstairs pack
ing, to take Clara to specialist
somewhere else Mrs. Whalen came
to my room after dinner and said
must rub kerosene or vaseline into my
hair every night for a month. don't
want to, but I'm so grateful about I'm.
Gle that I'll pour a lamp over myself
if she wants me to. Uncle came to
my room a while later and said:
"Hum!" and shook his watch, and
held it to his ear. I don't think he
liked being broken up with Miss Clara
Emily, but he only said he was going
out on the yacht tomorrow CHATS
today, and for me to consider my
self in Mrs. Whalen's charge for the
time being.
He went away early this morning
with Mr.. Peters and jim Freeman and
Lee, and Mrs. Whalen and I saw the
Kingsleys off for Rennes at noon. I'm
sure Miss Clara Emily felt dreadfully
over uncle, and Emily says she's more
than ever ashamed of having such an
aunt Emily told me that if an Eng
lishman came on this afternoons boat
from Jersey, to tell him they'd gone
to DOL She didn't want him In
Rennes, because she knows two
French officers in Rennes. 1t was not
a very nice day for travelling, fol
there is such wind they won't be
able to have the windows down at ALL
and you know it's only fun when you
len says she'd have the windows down
anyway; she says she'd like to see the
Frenchman that she wouldn't put
window down in his face, If she felt
like 1t. I asked her where she was
going next, and she said she had NJ
idea, but she thought to Dol and Mont
Saint-Michel, as long as she is so near
She says it was a stroke of luck her
happening here just in time to save
uncle; she's positive he was holding
her hand through the marine glasses
She says it's good she came about Mr..
Peters, too, not to>speak of Clara.
It keeps blowing more, and Scott
Mccarthy says that they'll be out all
night. Lee will like that, and uncle
won't, and uncle will see that Lee
likes it and then he won't like Lee.
Oh, dear! But I mustn't mind any
thing as long as Miss Clara Emily is
gone.
Mrs. Whalen has just come in to say
that she's going to Dol, so as to see
the tide come in at Mont-Saint-Michel,
and to measure out the ginger SO
can make Mr.. Peters the tea I'm sure
I'm glad she is going, for she makes
me so tired and nervous, always hop
ping up to fix something with her
screw driver. Lovingly,
YVONNE.
p. SIT is ten o'clock, and the
yacht never came in. If uncle gets
seasick in a storm, he'll never want
to lay eyes on Lee again, and he'll
never forgive me.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
The Second Best.

The Second Best.
Long, long ago, while yet my world was
fair
dreamed that Fate would grant me all
I sought;
Love, wealth. fame, and all that earth
holds rare,
My hope Of love I nourished and ca
ressed;
Some day, somehow, I, too, would have
1ife's best.
Now have lost my gold, Arcadian days.
And faith az well, and now too well
know
Our dreams die first, It's only life that
stays;
Yet love still fingers, for its death is
Gone, my heart-hopes-ungrante all tn,
rest
Humbly I pray to hold ufe's second best.
Stella Leerburger, In Gunter's Maya
zine. 49,
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
The Bad Bill

mistake. The driver gave him his
change-a dollar Itll-and drove of
very hurrieGiy.
Then Harrison became aware of
what he had dcae, and he shouted to
the man:
Hey, sop! That bills bad
"'Its good 1nsugh for you:' the
driver called tack,, defiantly, putting
on even greater speed.
"And HarHso1. examining his dollar
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
Taft Remembered Request.

art remembered NSQOeSss
When Mr.. Taft was passing through
South Carolina on his way to Charles
ton, to sail for Panama, little girl
handed him from the rear Of the train
q bouquet of violets. She had fas-
tened a card to the stems, on which
was written her name-Josephine
Bass.
is that your manner" asked the pres
ident.
"Yet@,," lisped the child.
"Your violets are very sweet, Jo-
sephire, and I would like to do some
thing for you: tell me what you would
like"
The little girl hung her head and
hut her fingers in her mouth rehec-
lively: then. with bright smile. she
said:
Il would like you to send rue a
souvenir postal when you get 10 the
canal"
The postal card was duly mstled,
and it 10 doubtful If the little receipt
ent had any more pleasure in the
transaction than was felt by tho presi-
dent-elect when he directed the H.
Illustrated bit. Of pasteboard to s"Miss
Josephine Bass" hi& little admirer in
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
Woman's Fine Record.

Miss Laura A. Hecox, who for ~
years has tended the light of the
Santa Cruz lighthouse, has but re-
Gently returned to her post from the
last Of the six vacations she has taken
during that period. Since 1881 she
has had ABSOLUTE charge Of the light
and n.aIls that timesft has never,eono
cut during the night.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
change under steel lamp, perceived
that it was a counterfeit"
Coincidence III Names.

In New York public school one
of the teachers has four pupils whose
names are the same as her own, and
the principal and the janitor get each
others mail for the same reason. An
other singular thing in this line &C.
CURED not long ago on the East side,
where the clergyman and the man and
woman whom he married had the
same name.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

He reminds me"-Senator Lafol-
lette was condemning a corrupt pol
itician who had come cropper-"he
reminds me of Harrison and his bad
five dollar note.
Harrison hurried down to New
York for the Hudson-Fulton celebra-
ton. He had in his vest pocket a bad
five-dollar note, and one night after a
banquet, getting out of taxicab, he
handed the driver this bad note BY
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

ing abroad? She arrived last night on
the Jersey boat, and saw uncle and
Miss Clara Emily on the ramparts
through her marine glasses. She
hunted US up at once, for she says
that affair must stop right where it
in my room didn't work, and she put
a chair on a wash-stand, and fixed it
with screw-driver that she carries in
her pocket Jim Freeman wants her
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

1TeQuenteU corner OF the snip, W.T.
ting to loved ones at home, play
ing cards, or mayhap exchanging
Christmas geetings with friends on
other ships of the fleet by means
of the picturesque wig-wag system
of flag signaling.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

increased Mortality Among Miners.
:, No fewer than FOG persons lost their
lives in the msues of Lancashire, Eng
lan4. last year. as against an average
annaal mortality Of 40 in recent
yean. .-- s*z~4.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
Literary Note.

There's big difference between
the book bug and the book worm. The
book bug lays the book and then
matches 1t and the book worm devours
1t II he doesn't get sick after his first
bite
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

christmas In New York harbor This means plen-
ty OF entertainment for the buejackets when they
have "shore leave and it likewise gives many of
the tars opportunity to entertain fair friends
aboard and proudly show them over the floating
fortress.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
A Casual INQUIRY.

i never have tasted liquor OF an.
kind nor used tobacco nor uttered A,
cath In my lite" I'm! Yo:. hatsH ,
Ell? Do you wear ruffies on yoar. uix.4t
shirt?"-Exchange.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

reunion that people enjoying during closing
week of December Of of Uncle Sans
NAV
happens to be where his
reside but naturally that
gency for blue. The
home Christmas and he
accordingly
Many of the features average program
the navy else that
might expected from whole community Of redbooded
healthy who have been
for some previously This accounts for the
given sports and athletic contests in the yulede
or course muscular competitions not monopoze attention
on this day days. There other redeer
twentyh of December not forgetting the traditional
mas spread almost inevitable minstrel
rounds 1t is in connection with these
play many of the pranks the prvi
they claim their
occasions.
naval sailor dearly loves joke any
occasion all the the buejackets display that
propensity that might be expected
of husky combine with strenuosy that
hilitu with The comforting
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
A Time to Give.

Every boy and girl should make
something to give to another at
Christmas time; there is scarcely
anyone who is not able to do some
thing to make another person hap
py at this season of the year.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

of an unfailing supply of substantial food and
warm clothing At Christmas this spirit reaches
climax The tars play FRANKS on each other;
they play FRANKS on their officers, who cannot
resent such attentions at this time, and they are
pretty apt to play pranks every body in sight,
They start in before daylight on Christmas morn
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

IL ordered that such functions shall take place
some other day and that the men be given prac-
tically free day. for their own amusement
Bluejackets who do not attend as participants or
onlookers the Christmas athletic program may
often be found on the holiday reading in some un
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

The trade name of a certain Austral.
ian brandy is the boomerang"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

Another new line of policy IN
the navy that makes all noh'
days more worth while IS
that. outlined in the recent
order of the secretary OF the
navy which prescribes that work
aboard our warships shall be reduced
to a minimum on Sundays and holl'
days. Even ship inspection and in
spect:on of the crew are dispensed
with on such occasions-or rather is
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
BY ANNE WARNER
YVONNE to Her MOTHER
Copyright, by the Century Go.

till she told me that Mr.. Brewer said
so.
We all took the tram-ride to Roca-
hey yesterday, but one is so afraid
that a wave will wash over the car
and drench every one with spray that
it isn't much fun. The tide is so fun
ny all along this coast, because the
coast is so level that foot of water
covers a mile or so, and when a wave
starts to come in there's nothing to
stop it at all. I don't think that St..
Malo is very interesting, but perhaps
that is just uncle and Miss Clara
Emily. He sends her violets, and I
know it is he, for it couldn't be Mr..
Peters, and it wouldn't be Jim Free
man or Scott Mccarthy. She wears
them pinned on in such funny way.
ST.. Malo (next day..
Dearest Mamma: Edna has sent me
the letter about your coming over,
and am so relieved. Perhaps you
will get here in time to save Uncle
from Miss Clara Emily; I do hope SO.
Edna's things must be lovely, and
read her letter to Lee. He says if I'm
good I will have some things of my
own some day, and do hope SO; but
uncle is SO heavy on my mind that
cannot realize that shall ever have
any life except trying to keep him
from Miss Clara Emily. Mr.. Peters
is no good at all any more, and has a
bad cold besides. He and Clara sit
on the ramparts and gaze a the sea,
and look as if they were two consola
ton prizes that the people who won
didn't care enough about to take home
with them. Lee says he never real
lied that Mr.. Peters could peter out
quite SO completely. Lee wants to 60
yachting, and wants me to go, too, and
l can't leave uncle, and uncle won't
leave Miss Clara Emily. It's quite
stupid here at St. Malo, and we want
to 60 on.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

South Carolina, and knew that her
wish would be gratified.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15
St. Malo (next day..

Dearest Mamme: Why didn't you
write me that Mrs. Whalen was COM
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-12-15

P. SIT is ten o'clock, and the
yacht never came in. If uncle gets
seasick in a storm, he'll never want
to lay eyes on Lee again, and he'll
never forgive me.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1911-06-06
.VANDALS SMEAR
PAINT ON STATUE
EZEKIEL IMAGE Of JEFFERSON
At UNIVERSITY OF VIZ.
sGINIA DESIGNATED.

CHARLOTTESVILLE VA, June e.
ihe entire college community la india-
nant over the act of vandalism on Eat
0rday night. when the bronze statue
OF Thomas Jefferson, which occupies
the esplanade on the north side of the
rotunda at the University OF Virginia.
was smeared with yellow paint The
figures surrounding the Liberty Bell
upon which the statue in Imposed. and
the bell itself, were also dishKared with
hlua paint The large pedestal Of
Italian marble did no: escape.
The persons engaged In this outrage
are not yet known. Ii liz one OF sew
aral incidents which have occurred
near the close OF the present session.
proceeding year for a generation at
this Institution Elsewhere they prob
ably would be regarded as snoyfng
pranks or foolish boys. but here they
are notable because of their rareness.
For previous similar conduct ave stu
dents have been required to leave the
university. In the present instance, II
Is not now known whether students are
responsible.
This statue of Jefferson is hand
some bronze figure of the statesIna n
standing or copy of the Liberty Bell.
surrounded by group parsorifysnG fhs
things for which Jaffersou's statesman
/ ship stood. Ali are elevated upon a
large pedestal OF rtchivcolorad Italian
+ marble. IL - the production of Sir
Moses Ezekiel. Virginia sculptor
whoaa home IL In Rome, where his ar
+. tistfc triumphs have been won. The
| ly $4,000. II WAS unveiled At tina
commencement last June, IN the pres
ence of large crowd Among the
i speakers the sculptor.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1911-06-06

familiar with the weight and seriously
of Mr. Crawford's drama. with its
''churchy' plot. were anxious to see
what would happen To IL in the hands
Of less distinguished actors Tho
players met the test and The White
Sister" viii prove one OF the most
popular productions of the season.
For a first night the production
was all that could have been expected.
There We're, OF course; "a few rough
places ard there were one or two
lapses Of memory on the part OF some
81 the principals all Of which VIII
disappear with future performances.
In the part Of the White Nun Mics
Marie Pavey has a role TO which she
Is admirably suited, and which wins
and holds the sympathy OF the audit
ence throughout the four acts. MIR.
Thornton. who on Monday night was
the principal offender IN the matter
of forgetfulness. has strong role In
+ Captain Giovanni Severi and In
which he is sure 10 make good.
The piece seems to bring out the
fun strength nf the company, and
Miss Dorothy Dalton and Miss Carey
! as members Of the company. Rich.
! mond will welcome them. as i, has
their associates. THE White Sister
/ deserves TO be seen, even II Il In not =
I pretty" story, and in the capable
hands OF the Schiller players shoult
/ prove popular with the night patron:
and an immense success with thos,
of the matinee.