Mrs. Grundy. (Tracy City, Tenn.) 1903-1930, 1911-02-23

as the nucleus to the plot
Take this as a pattern romance.
Father objects to Reginalds presence
about the house. He is forbidden to
call and Gwendolyn pines alone.
Reginald is for a time frantic, then
Respondent, and then an inspiration
is born of his dependency. Gwen
dolyn owns monograph. Acting on
the inspiration Reginald invests in an
outfit and breathes passion into the
tin horn after this fashion:
Darling Gwendolyn, do you recog-
nize this voice? l know It is strange
in your ears, for sorrow has clouded
my soul and the tones that were once
merry, which vibrated with the Joy
that | felt In life"-and so forth for
three-fourths of the record; then the
following In hurried, dramatic whis-
pers: "Gwennie, dear, be at your win
dow Wednesday night at $50 and
Wen put one over on the old man.
| Slide out into my six cylinder and
Wen beat 1t to my aero shed, where
the boys will have the biplane ready
| for us. Mind you, Gwennie, no
diction, but under the pressure of
emotional excitement the best lover
will lapse into the vernacular
GwendoIyn, the unsuspectine One.
Gwendolyn in the privacy of her
rooms to which she has retired to
pine receives the record with the next
consignment from the dealer and after
playing few ragtimers and reproduc-
lions of Caruso and Melba she slips
Reginald's record on the machine and
faints at the first words, just recov-
ering in time to hear the elopement
plans. They elope. Father pursues In
his aeroplane. They capture par
son and embark with him on sub
marine and come to the surface just
in time to see fathers specially char
tered turbine liner bearing down up.
on them The news of the wedding is
transmitted by wireless telephone and
forgiveness is forthcoming by the
same medium, whereupon they all re-
turn by transatlantic dirigible which
happens to be passing
Even this scheme of affairs-on
which, by the way, no rights are pre-
empted-fails to include a proposal
by telepathy and a marriage over the
wireless telephone. There have actu-
ally been proposals by monograph
with strange complications. There is
one instance on record where the OBJ
streperous parents received the
canned message first, ran 1t off on the
photograph. and intercepted all the
plans. There have been marriages
over the telephone where the run
away couple were besieged In such a
fashion that they could not reach a
parson or magistrate to tie the bow.
line knot so they just called one on
the phone and had him read the serv-
ice over the wire, they making the
responses and transferring the ring
In the most approved fashion.
The marital bureau was a novelty in
conventions of wooing, proposing,
clipping and wedding, but the telephone
wedding, the wireless proposal and
the aeroplane flight in no wise con-
flict with the sacred formulas of mat
ing; they simply use new instruments
to facilitate the most ancient and
time honored ceremonies.
In the Time to Come.
Now, for instance. If young man a
century or so hence finds 1t impossi-
BILE to reach his beloved in the hour of
his inspiration he is really commit
ting no sin against convention by
transmitting his immortal question
through the medium of the impalpable
ether. A proposal by telepathy, If 1t
be properly directed and not permit
ted to wander astray and settle upon
the wrong recipient, should be quite
as proper and should be as impartial
ly considered as a kneeling petition
on the aforesaid parental rug.
What boon this same telepathy
will be to the separated lovers! The
young woman sits In the parental
homestead under a severe matronly
eye Suddenly message heRins tn