The Washington herald., 1911-12-01
WOMEN FITTED TO
BE GOOD WIVES
Spend Their Lives in Single
BIessedness.
By DOROTHY DIX.

Once upon a time there were two young
maids who grew tired of sitting upon
the anxious bench waiting for eligible
men TO come along and notice them, so
they determined to get up and go out
and Hustle some on their own account
Now, both of these maids were most
charming and fitted to adorn any society
Also they were there with the glad raj
ment and nifty line of conversation
calculated to make a man swell up with
grattied vanity until he became so
chesty his shirt studs would not hold
Furthermore. these maids had had the
lnestimable advantage of being brought
up by mother who was onto the game
or life. so they passed up the girl bache-
Tor and latch key proposition as a false
alarm, and did not affliCt the public by
running any bIun about the glorious
privilege Of supporting herself being a
c.pch fer a female
On the contrary" they said to one
smother, "a good home and a ready
money bill payer is worth two careers
any day Of the week, and We opine that
any lady will find it less fatiguing to
work husband than it is to work a
typewriter"
Unfortunately. however. the elder of
the sisters had not been present when
the distribution of beauty was being
made, and hence she was a trif1e shy
- pulchritude. but when it came to real
intellect she was SalIy-the-whole-works
Alas. she said, as she communed
with herself. 4" my mirror tells me that
am the human chrome instead of a
living picture, and / am wise that + will
never win out my looks, but what
Is beauty compared to brains and a noble
disposition?
BrninIeEs Beauty.
1T is true that in beauty show
would not cut as much ice as my sister.
who certainly is a peacherino in appear
ance. but who has a mind of the con-
SistenCy Of scrambled eggs, and tenn
20 per like set OF Fourth of July fire
works.
Il do not wish to hurI any bouquets
At myself, but have made close study
of men, and l apprehend that my su-
perior knowledge of the subject will
leave my sister at the post. for while
she possesses beauty, I have a great
head
Il have listened carefully while men
discoursed about what women should
do, and have ascertained that while
they seem to admire the women who
look like a daily hint from Paris. what
they really yearn for is a female crea-
ture who takes serious views of life
ard who has no vanity and affectation
y have listened with profit to the
many knocks that men hand women for
their devotion 20 dress. I have also OBJ
served how they deplore the fact that a
creature with a soul should spend so
much valuable time in trying to make
herself attractive to men instead of en-
Gaging in some useful pursuit.
so il is up to me for the natural waist
line. and the puff1ess CoifTure, and to
give a moving picture illustration of all
the qualities men admire most in
women" and with that the elder sister
ut out the fashions adopted rational
iress, and devoted herself to performing
household stunts.
An Attractive Center.
The younger sister. on the other hand.
continued to help out nature with the
rouge pot. and the peroxided frank
furter, and although there was nothing
on her mind but her hair she was the
center Of attraction wherever she went
If she had searched her system she
could not have found a single idea in It,
but she had a habit of getting there all
the same.
She noticed that it is the maid with
The high-heeled slippers and the mar
celled locks and the frOu-frou skirt who
is fed on lobster and chocolate creams, |
and she opined that that was about all
that she needed to know in her busi-
''NSS' ~ 'i'N SpSNt HSI 'iiG III lIINOIouS
amusements, and in keeping her hands !
in a nice squeezable condition.
- Now, all of the old married people |
were never weary of touting the elder |
sister as the capital prize in the matri- |
monial lottery.
See" they cried here is a maid who |
realizes at last the ideal of a perfect |
woman. She is industrious, economical, |
sensible, and domestic. and as a wife |
she would be the real thing.
What you say is true" each man |