Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1911-07-07

! ii"" Sc luhuenCe o. me in boIli,,
aloof ane waiting al ways for o,n,
lures trom him. At tn. time 7 tborol,,
as no doubt he thousht also tho a.,
'a'Hrel was beneath the motto, %
men. ~ .
AT any rate my family decided mn
to come to Washington during bis Ave-
winter in the White House. live,
alone at the Willard One afternoor
toward the end of February re
turned there from the senate and
found Woodruff bad news in his faco
What is it?" | asked indifferentIv
for l assumed it was some poIiticar
tangle
Your wife-was taken-verv i'll
very suddenly, he said. His eyes told
me the rest.
II | had ever asked myself how this
news would affect me, should have
answered that it would give me a sen.
sation of relief. But, instead of re-
lief felt the stunning blow of wave
Of sorrow which has never wholly re-
2eded. Not because | loved ber--that
| never lid Not because she was the
mother Of my children-my likes ana
dislikes are direct and personal Nc,
because she was my wife-that boa5
had been CALLING Not because | w.
fond OF her-she was one of III
cold, angry natures that forbid al
lection. Ne, was overwhelmed be
cause she AID | had been intima..s
with all the closest interests OF id.
in common, with the whole war,
even my children, whom | loved 49,,
sionately outside that circle W., ,
fate had drawn around us two. iH
agine this is not uncommon am4n
married people-this unbeatable b rak
in their routine Of association wreI
one de arts. No doubt it often pa
with the unthinkiug for love belatcdIy
discovered
She did not suffer-" said Woodrur
gently, 1t was heart disease. She
had just come in from a ride Win
your oldest daughter They We're RESI-
ing and talking in high spirits by tho
library fire. And then-the en
came-like putting out the light
Heart disease, Often | had not.
the irregular beat of her hoarl--a
throb, a Ions cause, a 1utter, a short
pause, a tbrob And l could remem
Der that more than once the sound
had been followed by the shadowy APP
pearance. in the door of my mind. of
one of those black thoughts which try
to tempt hope but only make it hilz
in shame and dread Now, the mem
DRY of those occasions tormented nae
into accusing myself of having wished
her gone But it was not so.
She had told me she had heart trou
BILE but she had confided to no one
that she knew it might bring on the
end at any moment. She left a let
ctr, sealed and addressed to me:
Harvey: snail never have the cour-
age TO tell you vet feel you ought to
know. thisf ry one attributes ia
every one elsr less ohrewdness than he
possesses. ! Low you have not given
love ne. And you were so kind and
oonsidsrate and SO patient with my
moods that no doubt ! should have been
deceived had l not known what love is
! think, to have loved and to have been
loved develops in a woman a sort of
sixth sense-sens itveness to love. And
that had been developed in me, and when
it never responded to your efforts to de-
ceive me, j kew you did not love me.
4 r,,rh
was able to hide it from you. And it has
often irritatel me that You were SO un-
observant. You know now the cause OF
many of my difficult moods, which have
seemed causeless.
admired goa from the first time
we met ] liked you. I have been proud
of YOU | would not have been the wife
of any other man in the world, | would
not have had any other father for my
children. But / have kept on loving the
man ] loved before | met you.
Why? | don't know. despised him
for his weaknesses. l should never have
married him, though mother and Ed
both feared I would. ! think I loved him
because I knew he loved me. That is
the way it is with women they SCI Iom
love independently, Men like to love;
women like to he loved. And, poor, UNI
worthy creature that he WAS, still he
would have died for me, though God had
denied him the strength to live for me.
But all that God gave him-the power TO
love-he gave me. And so he was differ
ent in my eyes from what he was in any
ones else in the world. And l loved him.
don't tell you this because ] feel re-
eret or remorse | don't; there never
was a wife truer than /, for / put him
completely aside tell you, because !
want you to remember me right after
no