Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1911-01-06
house of commons, was wooing the

A prominent supporter Of the colo
mel was furthering his candidature
when a free and independent voter
declared with a fine show Of scorn:
II amt going to vote for a man who
Is only the kitchen. want man who
is the 'ouse." Quickly came the re-
tort "Oh, you don't want a man
in the kitchen, don't you? Well, If
your man gets returned, they will put
him in the boot hole, where he will
have to clean the other members
boots" But this reply was eclipsed
by an ancestor Of Lord Wemyss, who
at the time was contesting Fife. This
candidate did not believe in trucking
TO the electorate, and was noted for tho
freedom with which he gave his opin-
ion. Speaking from a window of the
town hall he was persistently heckled.
and strong lunged voter demanded:
will you vote for the tax on news
papers" NO" the candidate bel
lowed back, but I'll tell you what
I'll do. I'll vote to take the tax off
soap and let you dirty devils get your
faces washed A more conciliatory
attitude was adopted by the late
James Lowther when he was address,
ing a meeting in Yorkshire. The
meeting was not going well, and the
audience was decidedly restive until a
sportsman yelled: "Whatll win the
Great Yorkshire Handicap" This
was drawing a red herring across the
track with vengeance, but Mr..
Lowther had the wit to perceive his
opportunity. Here's a good double
for you," he replied. Back Mr.. -
(the candidate in whom he was in
terested) for the seat, and King Mon
mouth, (his own horse that had been
entered) for the race" Happily the
double came off and Mr.. Lowther's
stock went up with a bound.
Another candidate was asked by a
farmer at a Scottish meeting, WHO
owns the grouse?" He was somewhat
puzzled by the question, and replied
that he presumed they belonged to the
owners Of the various shooting rights.
No" replied the heckler, Il will tell
you who does-the Lord" And he
quoted the passage in the Psalms
which runs: II know all the fowls
of the mountains, and the wild beasts
are mine" 1t chanced that the can
didate was as we'll versed in the
Scriptures as in economic writings and
he promptly replied: II think, my
friend, you have forgotten the pre-
ceding verse. 1 will tell you what 1t
Is: Every beast in the forest Is mine,
and the cattle upon a thousand hills.
1t so happened that heckler was big
owner of cattle and the shaft struck
home.
The late Sir Charles Hammond, who
won a seat at Newcastle in 1892 when
he was returned as junior member
with Lord Morley, scored neatly off
heckler who ventured to interrupt
his discourse. Get yer air cut,
Charlie" cried the interrupter. Sir
Charles, who happened to be a mag
istrate, adjusted his glasses, and
calmly scrutinizing his interrupter, re-
marked, My friend, II I am not mis-
taken 1 have been the means Of hav-
ing your hair cut before today" 1t
was at Newcastle that candidate was
persistently heckled by an individual
who occupied front seat and shout
ed, Wrong, Jimmy" to every state
ment that was made. The candidate
got tired of this and apropos Of point
in his address he fixed his interrupter
and declared their grievances are
as numerous as the hairs on your
head" Wrong again, Jimmy" cried
the heckler uncovering and display
ing a head totally denuded Of hair.
The personal appearance Of the speak
er Is always regarded as fair game
by the heckler. A socialist who was
pleading his cause at a Huddersfield
election thrilled the crowd by vivid
picture Of the glorious conditions that
would prevail when socialism was es-
tablished. He was going full steam
ahead when a voice cried out: 'E's
fine trade unionist. e is. 'E's got nine
penn'orth of air on."-London Globe.