El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1911-03-29
The HeraId's
DailyShert Stery
The Wandering Arab

top of his head, and brought his teeth
together with a click that must have
sounded in the next street
Bismillah gave one yell of anguish,
clapped his hands to his mouth, and
sprang from his chair like one pos
sessed.
Moaning terribly, he ran in circles
round the kitchen, nearly knocking
Jane into the fire, and finally grovelled
at my wife's feet in an attitude Of in
tense pain.
1 felt certain amount of alarm, for
it was possible that 1 might have in
jured something in the roof of his
mouth and would have to pay for
doctor.
Poor fellow said Ella. stopping
and patting his head. He knows who
is kind to him! He must have bitten
his tongue, and 1 think you're very
unkind man indeed, James,
BY now, 1 had conceived a. bitter
hatred for Bismillah. and when Jane
amiably suggested my best brandy and
a cigar as a restorative, which was
agreed to by my wife, 1 left for the
club hurriedly, and did not return till
midnight
Just as I was getting into bed 1 re-
membered that 1 had not turned out
the hall gas.
AS I stepped out of the bedroom
fell over something bundled up on
the rug.
In two seconds I was trying to roll
what was evidently a man down the
stairs. while he was evidently trying
TO roll me up. It seemed as if he would
accomplish this apparently impossible
feat for he was strong and sinewy,
when suddenly my wife appeared and
shrieked loudly.
In an instant I was free, while my
assailant grovelled at Elias feet, and
I saw that is was Bismillah.
so dog-likew said my wife. "a
word from me, ard he's as quite as a
lamb. He must have been sleeping out
side the door TO watch over me. and
took you for an enemy
Replied with some asperity that on
the morrow I should take Bismillah by
the scruff of the neck and fling him
into the outer world once more, and
the proceedings terminated with tears
and a threat that Bismillah should
stop for ever.
But when 1 went downstairs Bismil-
lah, arrayed in a pair of my pajamas
and a flannel tennis jacket, was stand
ing by the table trying to cut the
bread with a spoon.
Il don't think he is well. dear, said
Ella. Il expect you hurt his tongue
last night; and when I tried to- explain
that he was to go, he fell on his knees
so gracefully that 1 hadn't the heart
to turn him out He shall stop for a
few days until we have heard from
his consulate, and he. can make himself
useful. He looks quite picturesque,
doesn't hep
remarked that he would make a
: !, ~ 1~,s&
have himself, and then looked round
for my boots
They were nowhere to be found. and
suddenly a horrid suspicion seized me.
looked at Bismillahs feet, and on
them were ny boots
Take them off, I shrieked in a
frenzy of rage. Selling carving
knife.
Bismillah dropped the coffeepot.
which my wife was trying to explain
was not kept in the coal boy and fed.
After a stern chase FIVE times round
the garden I caught him near his old
aid of the jobbing gardener 1 did my
best to suffocafe him In teh mold.
and finally recovered by boots.
1 was 20 minutes late at the office,
and spent most of the working hours
asking people If they knew what to
do with a wild Arab who wouldn't
leave the house
At last I hurried back home and de-
manded the instant presence of Bis
millah.
He's gone out for little fresh air.
DEAR was my wife's reply. and as
didn't want him to look conspicuous,
I let him have that old blue suit of
yours. You don't mind, do you, dear?"
In two minutes was securing the
neighborhood.
At length the policeman told me
that he had seen a foreign-looking
gentleman enter the private bar of the
crown.
I entered the next bar. and, peeping
over the partition. 1 saw Bismillah in
my blue serge suit and second best
hat talking bravely to the landlord,
and I heard distinctly:
''Oh, yes" he was saying in very
fair broken English, 81 stay just a.
down the road. Very old a-friend.
The lady's good-very good. but the
husband no good Never mind, 1 stay.
Yes-a, the lady Ikea me. So I stay
forever-yes."
And this was Bismillah, who did not
know a word of English
Hold him, landlord" I shouted over
the partition. I'm going to fetch
policeman"
But Bismillah heard. and was too
quick for me. AS 1 dashed out 1 saw
him flying down the street as if he
were followed by a host of evil genii.
I returned home, bolted and barred
the door, and sat up half the night
with golf club, in case Of attempted
entry by the window.
But Bismillah never returned, and
to this day local scandal credits me
with having cruelty maltreated an In
dian prince who sought the hospitality
which every Briton ought to extend to
the oppressed
And my wife is still of the opinion
that Bismillah was a stranded Arab
who ought by rights to have been in
his own country personally conducting
a caravan of cameis.
D-~,r~ .-o