Gilpin observer., 1911-08-03
OBSERVATIONS

Only sucker DelleveS all the Ilsn
stories he hears.
Misery loves company-and she
takes no pains in picking it.
When a man has half chance he
should grab for whole one.
Practice has not made perfect
husband out of Nat Goodwin.
1t would be unsanitary to make
some people swallow their words.
The inquisitive person finds out
lot of things he doesn't want to
know.
There are just 21O active volcanoes
in the world since Oyster Bay be-
came inactive.
The man who drives the water
wagon is open for a five months
engagement at some other trade.
Dictionary publishers have the last
word-but even they have to put it
in the appendix.
Some peoples patriotism lies DOR
mant until someone starts a move
ment to reduce the number of holi-
days.
Mexican poets are said to number
about one to a thousand Of popula-
ton. No wonder there are SO many
popular uprisings down there.
A Chicago mail order house offers
to furnish bridegrooms on easy
| terms. On the wedding day bride
groom always looks as if he was got
ten on pretty easy terms.
A western boy recently shot him.
self because another fellow took his
girl to a dance-and the fellow who
did take the girl got half so.
Central America is the Land of Op-
portunity-where every man has a
fighting chance.
A Boston man says he can prove
there are nine hells. Well let him
take his pick-only be quick about it.
The war scares have not become
serious enough as yet to cause in
surance companies to raise their
rates.
The eggs of a Philadelphia hen
cost $25 each. Only few years ago
the ultimate consumer would have
considered that price outrageous.
DR.. Wiley recently stated that heat
is only a condition of the mind. 1t
is significant that the hot weather
came at the time the department
first suggested firing him.
Mr.. Gary says the steel trust is
acting on the principle of the golden
rule. Maybe so, but it's yardstick
needs looking after by the Weights
and Measures department.
Gov. Aldrich, of Nebraska, when
asked to Issue a proclamation calling
for the observance of prayer for rain,
said he didn't believe the Almighty
would be influenced by interference
on his part. o, thunder!
A deaf man in Quebec was recent
| ly knocked hundred feet by pas
senger train. His hearing returned
to him as the result of the accident.
The railroad does not guarantee a
complete cure in every instance,
however.
II the automobile craze keeps in
creasing at it's present pace Osler
will never have an opportunity to
see how his theory would work out
in general practice.
Iceland has women's suffrage. The
wives and mothers of that country
don't intend to be left out in the
cold.
The sure way to get to heaven is
to follow the golden rule-and pay
your subscription. Our subscription
department is non-sectarian.
If woman was to wear the same
costume on the street that she wears
before the gaping crowds at the sea-
shore, she would be put in Jail or
the insane asylum.
The British government is prepar-
ing to take over the telephone sys-
tens of that country. If the tele-
phone girls go with the deal, it is
wise move. Hello!
England has 536 war vessels, Ger
many 1874, France FOG. United States
109 and Japan 161.
Easter comes on the first Sunday
after the full moon, which appears up
on or next after March 81.
A man always admires your judg-
ment when you ask his advice-and
follow 1t.
Silence is at least discretion when
you know your wife knows you have
q pretty little story framed up.
Work and wait" is good advice
when the last two words are obllter-
ated.
Conservation consists a whole lot
in wanting to conserve something
that some other fellow was going to