davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The statistician of the department
Of agriculture announces that the in
crease in American population is not
outstripping the increase in farm pro-
duction, but that, on the contrary.
farm production per acre is begin
ming to exceed not only the normal in
crease in population. but really to ex-
coed the actual increase" For a
long time Mr.. Hill and other long
distance prophets have been warning
the people against the day when
their farms wonld not produce enough
for domestic consumption. Evidently
their warning has either struck home
or they have oyerdrawn the situa
ton. Whichever theory is correct, II
is gratifying to know from Official
sources that better balance between
production and population has beer
STAINED
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
The Adventures
Mr.. Peter Ruff
~ Z. sHsLLses ossENHEsas
Delilah from Streatham
HiLLsss ossENHEsas
eo,rRleHr. "a y ~. r.A..0s rvaL.saMe Cd

(ceNtfrHed .ers~ yfsff~aay1
"If do" she answered. you are
not the one to sit there and reproach
me with it. are you? =
It's gone lar enough, anyway,
John Dory said. It's gone further
than meant 1t to go. Understand me,
Maud--it's finished! I'll find your old
sweetheart for myself"
She laughed heartily.
You needn't trouble she answered,
with little toss of the head II am
not such fool as you seem to think
me. Mr.. Ruff has made an appoint
ment with him
There was a change in John Dorys
| face. The mans eyes were bright
/ they almost glittered.
/ You mean that your friend Mr..
/ Ruff is going to produce Spencer Fitz-
/ gerald?' he exclaimed.
He has promised to" she answered.
John" she declared, throwing herself
/ into an easy-chair, Il feel horrid about
1 it. | wonder what Mr.. Ruff will think
| when he knows!
" You can feel how you like" John
Dory answered bluntly, SO long as
get the handouts on Spencer Fitz-
/ geralds wrists.
She shuddered She looked at her
husband with distaste.
Don't talk about it, she begged
sharply. 1t makes me feel the mean
! est creature that ever crRwled. I can't
help feeling, too, that Mr.. Ruff will
think me a wretch--quite the gentle
man he's been all the time, I never
knew any one half SO nice!
John Dory set down his empty glass.
thoughtfully, what made him take
wasn't 1t, Ell?
Maud tossed her head.
Il don't see anything so wonderful
about that" she declared.
Listen to me, Maud" her husband
, said, rising to his feet. You aren't a
| fool-not quite. You've spent some
y time with Peter Ruff How much
think carefully-how much does he re
mind you Of Spencer Fitzgerald
i Not at all" she answered promptly.
/ Why. he is years older, and though
! j Spencer was quite the gentleman
. there's something about Mr.. Rum. ard
the way he dresses and knows his way
+ about--well. you can tell he's been !,
/ gentleman all his life
I John Dory's face fell.
Y Think again" he said.
n She shook her head
IL Cant see any likeness" she de-
0 clared. He did remind me little oil
$ him just at first, though" she added
y refectively-" little things he said
!. and sort Of mannerisms. I've sort o.
= lost sight Of them the last few times
u though"
When is this meeting with Ti.z
gerald to come OFF, John Dory asket
abruptly.
!. She did not answer him at once. 4
: low. triumphant smile had parted hs
g lips.
Is Tomorrow night she said "h,
d is to meet me in Mr.. Rufus Office"
is AT what time?' John Dory asked
= AT eight o'clock" she answered
- Mr.. Ruff IS keeping his Office opel
% late on purpose. Spencer thinks tina
s. afterwards he is going to take me GU
lg to dinner"
ly You are sure of this? John Dor
Is asked eagerly. You are sure that til
!, man Ruff does not suspect you? Yo
believe he means that you shall NEE
Fitzgerald7''
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

II was the turn of the Western
trunk line railroads to submit argu
ments before the Commercial Com.
mission last week in favor Of the
higher rates proposed Counsel Han
son for the Chicago, Milwaukee and
st. Paul said that the valuation Of
that system was placed at $225,000,
900, on which they had earned only
5 per cent, which he thought was
proof that the rates at present were
too low. Counsel Horton for the Hi
nois Central claimed that the returns
of that system last year were 4.4s
per cent. All suggested that unless
more earnings were madc possible by
higher rates that government owner
ship of the railroads might as vel
come.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
rHE CURRENT MAeAzINEs.

r. G. Moorhead has an interesting
article in last weeks Golfers entitled
State to Cook which
describes Kansas successful expert
ence in bringing free instruction to
the doors OF the people. The article
is illustrated.
The third instslment of DR.. Arthur
c. MeGiffert's Martin Luther and
His Work, in the February Century,
deals with Luther and THE Awaken
ing Reformer" in the days following
his Italian journey. his growing sue.
cegg an a preacher and teacher, the be-
ginning OF his attacks upon many
abuses and excuses, and the widen
ing OF his horizon in his young man
hood
The Red Book Magazine for Febru.
AIRY is another exceptionally interest
ing Igsue Of this degervedIy successful
publication. The leading story, Cyrus
Athens Clear Call by Edward Price
Bell IN ~ impressive a bit of drama
as one recalls having recently read. II
concerns an old eIergymans attempt
at reyesse upon youth who had
led fits son info evil ways. Seurnss
AacAaDng contributes another appeal
ing story in the group Of Irish-Ameri
can tafez he is writing for The Rec
pook Magazine, and Charles Battel
l,o0nts in nThe other HaIf Of thu
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Another keokuk Boy Makes Good.
Glenn F. Jenkins has been given an
important position on the. Omaha
Bee and is now at work on that I'M
portant and old daily paper. He has
had varied and thorough going eS-
perience since he began his newspa-
per career in Keokuk ten years ago
and is now recognized as one OF the
best writer's and editors in the mid
die west
He has worked on the Indianapolis
Star which at that time at least
paid little the highest salaries and
preempted about the best men out
side New York City. He worked in
Omaha once before as a sub-editor.
He was city editor of the Sioux City
Tribune and later city editor of the
Des Moines Register and Leader. Pre-
viously, he worked in Ottumwa-
Columbus. Indiana. and other small
cities bfore getting on the big news
papers and landing in Omaha. For
few years he confined his work to
writing feature stories for syndi-
cate of Sunday papers. For while
he was engaged in helping and direct
ing daily papers in the smaller cities
in the preparation of big annual edi-
tons In short he has played the
newspaper game to good advantage
through all it's intricacies-
1t was foregone conclusion from
the beginning that he would be sue
cess as a newspaper man. He left
school to work as a boy in a box fac
| tory in West Keokuk. Later he was
given charge of a machine when ma
chimes were installed instead OF many
boys. A little later he was at work in
/ the office of the company.
! Then he decided that he needed
more education and that he had to
/ keep on working for living. He con-
cluded that newspaper work was a
good school which paid wages instead
of calling for expenditures. So he de-
cided to become a newspaper reporter
at once. He went to the city editor OF
the Constitution-Democ and asked
for job without receiving any better
Il
call again sometime later.
He called again in week and an
nounced that he had resigned his po-
sition in the box factory office; that
he was going to work as a reporter;
that he would sit around the city
room all day and the city editor was
i expected to send him out whenever
he needed an extra man or had any
4 thing a cub could do. that by this
process he hoped TO get on the pay
roll sometime, and If not he would be
learning lot anyhow. He sat in the
city room and studied the dietionar.
with bizarre results to his vocabu
Iary-for month or SO. and then his
persistence won and he was employ
ed as a reporter. A little later he fol
lowed that city editor to The Gat'
: City and learned to be a crack re
| porter on this paper. Since then h.
has been learning his trade as tn
German and English craftsmen do
: by working in as many differen
places as possible. II is not ba'
method of learning any craft. Gel
tainly Glenn F. Jenkins has made
: method of great value to himself
! He has pulled himself out Of pos
] ton mailing boxes together in far
: tory into one of the best newspape
!. positions in the country Probabl
: the fact that he is Keokuk produc
a had something to do with it, too.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The latest fashion decree is that
boomers are TO succeed the hobble
skirt. The edict comes from Paris
and from it there is no appeal The
era OF orientalisin is at hand and the
new costume is 10 be an exact re-
production of the dress" worn by
the Turkish ladies minus the veil. II
would seem as if the climax OF the
lysteria of women's clothes var
about TO be reached.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Keokuk's future will be what Keo-
knk people will to make IT. The
destiny of the city is in their own
hands. The disposition at present is
To improve every opportunity to the
fullest extent, and this policy should
be persisted in despite all difficulties
and discouragements Pluck will win.
it always does.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
ruoueH1 FOR The DAY.

Mind is the Master-Power that
moulds and makes.
And Man is Mind, and evermore ne
takes
The Tool OF Thought and, shaping
what he wills,
Brings forth thousand JOYS a
thousand ills:
He thinks in secret. and it comes TO
pass;
Environment is but his looking glass.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

There Is something new under the
n. after all. Such inconsistency as
he so-calIed progressive" are man
Testing in opposing a special primary
10 select a candidate for United
states senator was never seen before.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
CROSSING THE BAR.

CROSSING THE BAR.
Sunset and evening star,
And one clear call for me-
And may there be no moaning of the
bar
when put out to sea.
But such tide as moving seemed
asleep,
Too full for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the
boundiess deep
Turns again to home
Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark,
And may there be no sadness or fare
well
When ] embark.
For though from out our borne OF
time and place
hope to see my pilot face 10 face
When | have crossed the bar
-Tennyson.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Soup. soap and salvation is the
motto over a gospel mission in KAN
sas City 1t is suspected that good
many who visit the place never get
further than the first item.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The STAFF correspondent OF the Chi
cago Tribune reports that Senator
Young has written pledges from thir-
tF-one standpatters TO stand by him
until released II this is the fact the
Sioux City Journal concludes that
Senator Young has ample warrant for
his claim that the standpatters are
masters Of the situation
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
CLINTON 5 Storage
inton's Transfer.

;.:srohandlss, Machinery. Furniture
Stoves, Musical instruments, Pictures
and everything In tho Storage line
Laros, clean, safe warehouses. Prices
reasonable, Including Insurance.
TRANoFER LINE IN CONNECTION
once 625 Riondeau. Boil, phones 10
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The Marshalltown Times-Repnbli-
can says that one of the surest ways
of avoiding the payment of hunters
license next year is to drag shotgun
mnzzle first through woven wire
fence.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The Des Moines Register and Lead
er SAYS it may be another case OF the
more the merrier,s but the hiiarlty
doesn't seem TO make lowa's senator
ial candidates hysterical as yet
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Sena or.elect Kern of Indiana
chung 10 his whiskers through
out the campaign. and with equal
nerve parades them with the pictures
of the victor
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

A farmer wields the gavel in the ILL
nois house OF representatives oul
the lawyers have the floor.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Watch Keokuk grow.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
DAILY BIZ MAIL. :. N

DAILY BY MAIL ~.n
One year...... s3.EIFour mont4as- - x
six mont,s.. L5ciOne month .. q
Entered in Keokuk poBtonice a. seconA
postage prepaid; terms In sdys i.e 1n.
Ali subscription orders should Gire "a sn =
20. address and steA whether ~ 80 ~
new or renewal order. cnanse "a
sddress IL desired. state both Inc oas
Unit o. postoffice money ole e.a.
expresa money order. registefeu
The date printed on the address os
each paper notes wnsr the suDse'ap 49,
subscribers failing TO receive Yer ,hs 81
psners promptly viii CONFER z 1aNoA -
s5yirr y.otice Of the fact
ADDRESS al comnunieations 70 yy
THE GATE CITY CONT A.
M. il. North sixth St. heokuh. Low
THE GATE CITY i on SAFE 80
FOLLOWING news stands:
Hotel keokuk. cor. Third arc 5oa asyset.
q n Rollins & Co.. W main s
&ard Bros So Main street
Depot News stand-
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

The January shaw now in progress
is dong its share toward cleaning Oh
the sidewalks
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24
NOTES AND COMMENT.

Western Iowa editors have afFaBg-
ed for meeting at Council Bluffs Feb
ruary 24th.
The Davenport Democrat NOES that
Uncle George d. Perkins never nee
ries in what be considers we'll doing.
He runs the pronged prod into Eena.
tor Cumming every day. twlstg u .
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

Senator Lodge was lodged, all right
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1911-01-24

few times, and then serenels resumes
his usual train OF thought.
Wiarus. (Winona, Minn.) 1895-1919, 1911-04-20

niosla wladzom o zbrodni. Kadzik
mia} widocznle powod do obaw,
gdyz postanowi} zabi6 druga swq
zone j popefni6 samobojstwo. W
tym celu wza} powr6z l zone zwa'
BIC chcia} ma poddasze. Kobieta
przeczuwa}a cos niedobrego III
ciek}a do saslad6w. Gdy przyszFa Z
k1lkoma do .domu, zna!az}a meza
obwieszonego juz niezywego.
Hell. Cd przeszlo ID dnl zajmu-
ia sic ryLacy }owieniem }oscsi, ale
truly ich daremne DO }csosi wog6.
lie dotad Lie napotkano. Sledzie
take ME fokazuja sic. Rybacy So
" obawie O zarobek, tenn wlecej
re " nie]eduym domu juz b:eda
,panuje. Znawcy ME moga pojae,:
gdzle ryby SIC podzia}y.
ELBLAG. Przez zimez powodu
ewa{townych wich16w wzburzone
morzc wvrzucl}o znacz"a ilost
%bursztynu. N~iekt6rzy rybacy o.
s:agneli juz 400-5oomr. "a wyfo"
wiony bursztyn, znajdowano navel
znaczue kawa}k1. Wobec tego ry-
bat.y wsp6lnemi sitami naby6 chca
maszyny do wydoby wanna b}ota z
bursztynem z dna morsklego, jak
to sic JUL dawniej ds,s}o, -.
" s,..
CHEkMNO. W sobote s%nalezio~
no bez *Ycia W stsjni gokcinnego
D.. Wendta W Wlelklch Lunawach
pewnego cz}oAieka. Czy zachodzi
tutaj morderstwo Tub samob6jstwo,
wyksze " najblizszym czasie
6ledztwo.
Wiarus. (Winona, Minn.) 1895-1919, 1911-04-20
z PRuS POLSKICH.

CORA, Sprzedany ko6ci64ek iuz
zosla} rozebrany i obecnie pracur
ja mad wvdobywaniem fundamen..
tow. Z~nslaz1ono diva Fundamental,
to cd ostatniego W roku 1925
zbudowanego ma}ego koscio}a i
cd pred o~statniego koscio}a,
&t6ry byi znscznie wiekszym. lie
starsze Fundamental ME by}y ruszo-
ne wcale i opasywa}y i otaoza}y
zupe{nle ostatni ma}y koscio}ek.
Ma wiezy by}a choragiewka i kula
re starszego koscio1a z .roklem
1899, Ma kull by} napis 'wyryty, IL
%proboszcz wejherowskl. g6rski l
redzki W roku 1899 kosci6} i wife,
"a daf wyrestaurowa6, lod pano"
wan,em Augusta, kr6la Polski4
w kos;iele znalezlono diva gro
by, jeden zwyczajny, pod ch6rem,
z kt6rego ,wydobyto opr6cz ko6cl
mafa, dob'ze zachowana jedwabna
chustke. Drug; gr6b byi pod wiel"
kim o1tarzem wymurowsnY ceg{a-
mi W glioe, gdzie %znalez1ono try
male sreb'ne pieniazki l skorupy
cd staros wieckich talerzy. Kawa"
lex cd fuLdament6w znaleziono
tez try groby skrzynkowe csa"
sow pogahsk: oh. Popielnice POI
ttu&}y niestety sig.
DABR0WNO. Pred 9 ciu laty
wpad&a do studnl ma wybudowanla
W Sehwalde (O pod Dabrownem
iona 'posiedziciela Kadz j uto-
ne}a. TAX przynajmniej ka4dy
mysla&. K. ozenit sic po rae drugi
j zonie przyzns} sig po kilEu la"
tach pod wielkim sekretem, Re 20
s1edl ~ pierwsz2 iona do studni,
a uchwyci} ja ty}u "a nogi i
zrzuc,} W g3ebie g}owa ia dol
Kobieta milcza{a ma ,azie, lecz gdy
maj sp%oniewiera{ ja ze zsmsty do
Wiarus. (Winona, Minn.) 1895-1919, 1911-04-20
Kopniety przez dZikiego
kOnia.

Samuel Birch, z BeetowD, Wis.
!, mako co uszedi nieszczesciu u
traty nvgi, gdyz laden dokt6r ME
m6g} wyleczyc n1ebezp1ec.n rany
iaka sic r,zwine}a, lecz naresscle
Bucklena ma6c arulkowa wyieczy}a
ja kompletnie. Jest TO nsjlersze
lekarstwo ma ~rzody, sparzenia.
,uzy, wysypk;, skaleozenia, odras-
niecia, nsgnlotki, zimne rany, wy.
wichniecis amoroidy. Spr6bujcie
CSC " apiece NJ. J. Kowalewskiego.
Wiarus. (Winona, Minn.) 1895-1919, 1911-04-20

Gil VICE. z ma}ej ehmury well
XII deszcz. Is letni syn pewnego Stu
SARA, zamieszkafego pr1y uls Prey
s~zowieckiej, przybiegt; psdem dc
OLGA, grajacego " karty VI pewne]
restauracyl, z doniesienlem, ze jego
starsza c6rka pakuje swoje. rzeczy
ma w6z i chce uciee. Mimo profess
tn grajacych ojciec przerwa} gre
i pobieg} do domu, gdzle trati}
~jeszczs ma czas, ably ucieczke c6rki
udaremnic porzadna porcYa odlewa~
nych ,,prsYjaclelowi,, c6rki Gdy
nastepnie powr6ci} do res tauracyl i
przerwana gre " karty ma nowo
podjeto, pcwsta}a kfotnia pom'edzy
graozami 2 powodu w1asnie po-
przedniego prserwania party', poll
czk6w swemu partnerowi. Powsta
Ia etad 1alalczywa b5jka, " ktdrej
nsjgorzej wyszed} 6lusars, skutk'
v postaci sinc6w i guz6w podobn"
d}ugo ieszoze bedzie odczuwa}.
Wiarus. (Winona, Minn.) 1895-1919, 1911-04-20

unie winnlenia swego karygodne-
go czynu poda} pewien robotnlk
stad ma jednem z ostatnich posle.
dzen izby karnej W. Gniezn,e. Zg1o-
six on swe3o a ma urzedz1e stanu
cyw,lnego 6miert swego sYna, kt6-
ry ~jeszcze kilka tygodni pc ,zglo-
szeniu 6mierci zy}. Gdy p6znlej ma
stawlony lwniosek mlano owo faf>
szywe ~zg}oszenie z ksiag urzedu sta~
nu cy wilnego wymazaG oh}opiec W
rzeczY samej umar}. Gdy sic ma sa-
die ~oskarzonego pytano, co go
spowodowa}o do zupeinle bezpod-
stawnego zg}oszenia smierci syna
swego, odpowleds'a}. re przede.
wszystkiem chciaf rgniewad p. bur.
mistrza a potem chcial zobaczy6 "
iaki sros6b p. RurmistrA wymaze
z ksiag urzedowych nieprawdziwe
~zg{oszenle sm,erci. Naturalnlo sad
ME m6g} uznac ciekswosci oskar-,
zonego "a dostateczne uniewinnie-
ME ola tego da} kllkakroSu,e Jul
karanemu cskarzonemu sposobnosG
numy5!enia sic, csy lego nreched DE-.
p. burmistrza Jest uzasadnlcns,
dyktujac mu . tygodn'e wie.ie~
mia.
POZNAN. Pr.ess&o 1000 NIX.
przetrwoni} " lokalach z nsluR3
damska 22-letni pomocnik biuro~
Wy Stanis}aw Pataiczak. Peosya.
jego mlesieczna wynosi so mix.
poniewa1 jednak iy} bardzo seum
ME, . p~ieniedxy ~w34snych ME STAR
o.y 10, siegna} do szkatu}y praco"
dawcy. Izba kama skazata go ma
s;edtm missieoy w%is'ienia.
The Washington herald., 1911-12-10
APPEAL OF LOBBYISTS
TOUCHING REELECTION
FINDS FALLOW GROUND

Chief Botanist William +. Smith. OF
the Botanic Garden, tells a good story
Of a new Congressman and a body OF
Virginia seed-growers who came to this
city several years ago to do away with
the free seed distribution.
When the seed growers arrived" says
Smith, they had a fund of 5000 for
lobbying purposes, and the first man they
expended this money on was a member
Of the House, whose position in office
after his present term was decidedly un-
certain.
1T is not purely because this seed dis
tribution is hurting our business that we
appeal to you. suh." explained the chair
man of the committee, when they had
Cornered the Congressman, but 1t is also
because this is nothing but form of
graft
The Congressman remained silent.
I'VE will pay" resumed the chairman,
the sum of 5000 il you will crusade
against this graft. You see what it is.
Merely a scheme by which Congressman
get themselves reelected
We'll" thundered the Congressman in
whats the matter with il?
I won't fight free seeds-not for $4,000,
But l wish to God that you would think
OF two or three more schemes as good as
this. I'll pay 5000 for them"
The Washington herald., 1911-12-10

Times man are very nice and don't put
in the ages, but those of the Post and
The Herald. are just too horrid for any
thing. There were just lots of nice girls
passed the twenties who went to Balti-
more and other nearby places last win
ter and pretended to elope when they
were just wild to have a nice home we'd
ding with all their friends around them.
and there are lot more who are going
TO get their fathers and brothers and
sweethearts TO stop taking those papers
! think you call 1t boycotting or some
thing like that-if they continue the
practice, but 1 believe, perhaps. they
just don't think about how bad it makes
us feel and when you will all agree that
1T is the nice ChivaIrous thing to do this
to please us, even if it were not to YOUR
own interest.
Think what a lot of business YOU lose
when the couples go out of town. Now.
am going to watch the papers with
great interest and so are the others of
our circle, who are planning their we'd
dings for this winter, so please do help
us. You can do 1t If you will. and 7
can't imagine your not being a real nice
man. Hopefully, A PROSPECTIVE"
The Washington herald., 1911-12-10

A gay LOchinvar who has been paying
court to a woman many summers his
junior, but to whom he represented him
self to be much more youthful than facts
would vOuchsafe, is in a quandry as to
how to prevent her from finding out his
age. They are to be married soon and
everything is in readiness to make them
man and wife. After thinking the prob
lem over he finally hit upon the idea of
writing a 'ladylike' letter to the mar
riage licensed clery and complain to him
about those ''horrid" newspapers whose
reporters copy the age of the prospective
bride, and publish it next morning He
threatened boycott and other dire meas
ures against the clerk of the court, as we'll
as the papers, If they don't stop publish
ing the ages of the prospective couples.
The letter. which is addressed to the
Marriage license clerk" is typewriter
and is as follows:
Washington. November q. 1911
Dear Mr.. Cupid: I want to tell you
how unhappy you are making a lot of
prospective brides in Washington by let
ting the reporters from the morning
papers copy the ages of the couples IL
censed to marry. The Star man and the
The Washington herald., 1911-12-10
INSURANCE MEN HEAR
A BURNING" JOKE, BUT
LAUGH IS AT PREMIUM

When cur free-spoken and frequently
speaking fellow citizen, former Commits
sioner Henry B. F. Mcfarland, let's
loose an after-dinner joke it's up to the
diners to catch it cleanly and without a
nun, or they'll catch something entirely
different from Henry B. F.
Last week Henry B. F. was scheduled
to give one of those "This-is-a-great-
pleasure and speaking of pleasure-re-
minds-me" effects before the Life Un-
derwriters' Association. When he got
to the part where he had to work in the
Joke he congratulated Daniel, who, he
stated, remarked on entering the lions
den:
THE one pleasure about this is that
tbereII be no after-dinner speaking"
The laugh came slowly. Then the
speaker, eying his guests carefully, said:
said:
II am glad to see you are conserva-
tive. gentlemen. Your quickness reminds
me of the remark of De Wolf Hopper
that he had always supposed the Virginia
creeper was a plant until he rode on the
Southern. Thank you, gentlemen; thank
you
And you can bet that after that every
body laughed when he was supposed to
laugh.