davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
spanks Wife Weekly.

When a husband forms the habit of
spanking his wife it is not easy TO IN
duce him to change his way or TINS
Mrs Mabel Baker, Of 5S11 Market
street is firmly convinced. Before
breakfast yesterday she had her hus-
band, George Barker, a meat dealer,
arrested for having spanked her IasI
Tuesday but when he was arralsneo q
before Magistrate Beaton in the city
han nolfce court few hours later, she
ANNOUNCED that she did not want him
sent to Jail. He was discharged.
ssThere is only one way to get George
to do a thing" said Mrs. Baker last
night. in admitting that the court pro-
ceedings We're not an entire success, s.
''and that is to have MIN make up MS
own mind to do it.
1--WE have been married about two
wears and half. He commenced
sDanking me two weeks after our wed
ding day, and he has kept 1t up almost
and so have I; and If we Jangle, a
snanking follows. He is not big man
and I am not a small woman, but
am completely helpless in his arms.
His muscles are like IRON
.sWhen he spanks he puts me across
his ian lust as one would a baby, and
then l am spanked
"Once. after a spanking, waited
until his back was turned and hit him
with weight
He was SOOQ-ndt0IC0 GDO0h H. 81
though he bore a mark for two weeks,
and only grumbled.
eApart from his quick temper and
his determination to spank me every
time we disagreed, he is splendid
man. There is nothing in the world
he would not do for me or give me-
IT can't tell how many times have
been spanked. At first / endured the
humiliation of such punishment be-
cause I didn't want people to know
about it. Then I threatened to have
him arrested. 1 suppose I threatened
so often that he thought 1 would never
do anything. But when he spanked
me harder than usual last Tuesday
caused his arrest. It didn't cost me
anything, but George had to pay $40
for a lawyer. although it seemed TO me
that IS would have been enough for
such easy work.
when he was discharged we came
home. but we didn't speak, except
once when George told me never to
enter his store again
when he gets tired of being angry
I suppose we will make up. and I sup
pose he will spank me again. But that
doesn't worry me. I've been spanked
so often that am used to it."-Phifa@
delphia North American.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
GLOBE SIGHTS.

IFrom the Atchison Globe.l
Some men can never get anywhere
without a row.
Some people save time so they will
have more to waste.
One shouldn't use the same bluff too
often, if he would avoid a call.
For its size, the dictionary probably
carries the most excess baggage.
To a clothing store man. every sea-
son seems a little slow in starting.
Aviators who have tried it, see the
difficulty of hitching ones wagon to
star.
Some people want to live forever.
and others would like to see the tariff
settled.
Claiming to be doped never gets the
loser any nearer the winners end of
the purse
Most men never fail to have small
change in their pockets when they at
tend church.
When a man gets tired of woman.
it is difficult for Lorajean Libbey to
help matters much.
Studying high mathematics may also
aid the freshman in mastering the foot
ball signals.
In figuring a strike victory, the time
lost should enter into the calculations
oftener than it does.
Sometimes a travelogue seems about
as long as the journey required to get
the story and pictures
No doubt the spotted coach dog.
trotting beneath the carriage believes
IL is carrying the load.
Billiken doesn't seem to be doing his
former amount OF business, and there
are other improvements.
There is so much good literature
that the circular letter isn't as widely
perused as many believe.
There are a number Of fools who
don't carry guns, of course. but they
are of the less dangerous varieties.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
CONSIDER THE GROUCH.


He wears no simulated smile
At every time and place
Sometimes you see for a half a mile
The frown upon his face.
He isn't much on shaking hands,
His manners sharp and short;
In fact, he scarcely understands
The way to be a sport
He very seldom buys a drink
Or blows the bunch for smokes;
He seems to want to spend his chink
Upon his wife and folks;
The merry grafters call him close,
The lushers say he's tight;
They dub him grouehy, sour. morose,
And doubtless they are right.
But when you're broke and need a friend,
Why, he's right there. you bet;
He'll stick right with you tc the end,
Through trouble. woes and debt.
He'll swear at you most heartily
(But stake you when you're flaD;
It's pretty good, 1t seems to me,
To have a friend like that
He loves his children and his wife,
And though his face is grim,
And though he doeSn't grin through lie
His friends all swear by him;
His workers love his very frown,
And for his goodness vouch;
And-wel, I'll let you put me down
AS one who loves the crouch.
Puck.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
HVHOR or TIE DAY

Has he done anything since he went
He has made a record" Funny hadn't
heard anything OF It. You win. He so
licited bribe yesterday ana there was a
dlctaphone concealed in the room. "-Hous-
ton Daily Post.
Mrs. Excl can always tell when M,
husband has been drinking the moment
he kisses me. Mrs. Wye-And I can al
ways tell when mine has been drinking
by his not kissing me.-Boston Transcript.
This Language Of Ours.-Fige-Brosgn
cant fill his orders. He discharged a lot
OF MS hands because they got full. FoGE-
l see; and now he's got his hands full
Boston Transcript.
A Mean Brother.-she-Ha twin
brother annoys her dreadfuIly. He-TIowT
She-H on see, everybody knows they are
dwlns' ana poor Maud can't pass Tor only
change.
A Most Unusual Way.-Jorkins-rfov
did you ever come to possess such a shah
oy-looking umbrella as that2 Dorkfns-
Why, I got this umbrella in very Pc
cuAar way bought it.-Exchange.
Shrewd Boy-want a situation as er-
randboy, do your Well. can you tell me
how far the moon is from the earth eh9
Boy-Well. guv'nor, I don't know: but [
reckon 1t amt close enough to Interfere
with me running errands. lie got the Job.
First Illustrator-Great Scott. mani
you're painting that apple an awful sizei
Second Ditto-I know it. It's TO be used
in nursery stock catalogue.-Judge.
She F1ew.-Miss Fuliosoul (of a poeticai
turnl-Which are you of opinion one
should say professors Summer files or
summer flees'T Absent-minded Profess
sor great on entomology)-The two
Species my dear young lady, are entirely
distinct. Now. the common house fly
-Bostin Transcript.
You may break, you may shatter, the
vase IL you will" He paused and bent a
severe look upon his young wife. but
went on, Ito leave that sort of thing to
servants The woman, on her part. BIT
her lip chagrinedly, but she spake never
a word.-Puck.
Some of the primitive instincts Inger
In the highest civilization" said the
statesman: Yes" replied the ethnologfst:
many OF our communities cannot get
away from the idea savages all have
that a man who manages to get possess
sion or high silk hat IS thereby qualified
to be leader. Washington Star.
Say, pa, what does II mean when Il
says the supreme court dissolved n trust7'i
We'll. my son, you see. hum-ha-that's
a sort OF solution of the trust question
more pap .weii. my son. When sis you any any
solve lump OF sugar in water, the trust
is still there, but you can't see it."-Life.
He-How is this? I come bacl, une~-
pectedly from my trip and find you fiirt-
Ing with another man. You have deceived
me. She-Not any more than you. You
told me you would be away eight days
Have you not also deceived me.-Flieeende
Blaetter.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Peace often costs more than a fight.
Society shocks lot OF people who are
not in It,
One way to get even with people f. 70
pay what you owe.
Many a man apparently goes to pieces
before he is broke.
Laugh today; your sense Of humor may
be out OF commission tomorrow.
Luck seems TO have a mania for drop
ping in on those who do not expect a.
If you have another mans umbrella ne
is at least entitled TO your sympathy.
It takes a woman 20 generate enthus-
iasm over a present that IS OF no earthly
use.
woman isn't necessarily Of the bold
faced type because you can read her like
a book
II a girl really wants 70 marry a man
she can lead him up to the altar without
waiting for leap year.
Just to prove that she doesn't lack ~,
sense Of humor. the average woman
wants TO be humored all the time
Occasionally a man spends all his time
making money to buy food and ciothea-
only TO find the food disaerees with hir,
and his clothes dove -
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
QUAKER AIEDITATToNs.


TF'rom the Philadelphia Record.1
Where ignorance is bliss It's folly TO
have eyes.
Money always talks loudest just before
election.
Many a man is dead one long before
the undertaken Is called In.
The man who can combine business and
pleasure Is a pretty good mixer.
The man who gets to the bottom OF
things Is the one who comes out on top.
This makes my blood boil" said the
cook when she found the water wouldn't.
The unsuccessful gambler realizes that
money can be lost IN more ways than
won.
I'm afraid this isn't my long suit" re-
marked the stout woman as she tried on
a walking skirt
TRY one Of my funerals and you will
never use any other" advertises a Kens-
ington undertaken.
Queer that the ald-headed men all sit
in the front row, in spite OF the close
proximity to the flies.
1.-The idealist always hugs a deIusion."
remarked the Wise Guy. well, a delu-
sion generally wears petticoats. added
the Simple Mug.
Tommy-''Pop, what is executive abii-
ity2" Tommy's Pop-"Executive ability.
my son, Is the knack Of getting somebody
else to do your work for you"
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

It is always with fear and trembling
that one strikes the note of warning
against the dangers that menace
through the family pet; but now and
then it has to be uone. and all the
more because of the fact that the
dearer the pet the greater the menace.
says an article in the Doctors Corner
in The Youths Companion It is hard
to prove to people who adore their
cats that this lovable. hugable. kissa-
BILE animal can be, and often is, a car
rier Of the worst kinds of disease
germs. They say, why. our cat is the
daintiest. cleanest thing in the world.
She washes herself all the time"-and
1t is quite true, she does. only un-
fortunately sne has no knowledge of
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

does striking1y resemble Rex, only tnat
Rex is younger and fresher looking.
Betty backed up TO the dressin
table, her eyes wide and scared.
Suddenly the phone bell rang mer-
rily. Marjorie answered =. smiling
wickedly.
"It's WalIy, dear" she said present
". Mr.. Bretherton is with him.
Would it spoil your visit. dear, II we
had Rex for a week. too? He's so FOR
lorn, and he won't come unless you as
sure him it win not be unpleasant for
you"
BETTY reached for the receiver i'm
petuousiy.
"Go away, WaIly. This is Bet. Yes.
Give me Mr.. Bretherton, please. Oh.
hello. Won't you please forgive me
II don't remember you At all. What
Why. no. 1 shall be delighted TO meet
you again. Truly. I'm afraid I don't
understand you"
She turned and covered the mouth
of the receiver.
'Ma-aerie, he says he Will come for
week. but he will make love 10 me
all the time and carry me Off 70 Pan
anna in a months time. and that he's
completely overheard. and Wally Is on
his side. Whatever shall do?"
Throw him a life preHerver.
laughed Marjorie.
Betty's color famed 20 her ear tips
She ignored the suggestion and almost
Whispered back into the phone.
You may come II you wish IL
will be here three weeks" Copy
right, 1911. by Associated Literary
Press)
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Too many people give the Devil more
than his due.
And sometimes. the woman, who is a
good cook, is nothing more.
x X y
Almost any parade could get along
just as we'll without a drum major in
front of the band.
y
Money may talk. but it's pretty hard
these days for the man in ordinary cir
eumstances to hold a continued con-
versation with it.
X
Most of the men, who say they are
women -haters, and most of the wo-
men. who say they are men-haters, are
merely posing.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

President Taft's denunciation of the
muck-rakers of colleges was well
timed. It is too much to expect that
all the young men attending the high
er institutions Of learning in this coun-
try are anywheres near morally per-
feet. And it is decidedly unfair for
would-be reformers to charge all the
college boys with the defects of a few
of fhern
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Philadelphia American League
team has won sufficient games to as
sure it the championship of that
league for the season of 1911. But be-
tween the Athletics and the champion
ship of the world for this year stands
the lively New York Giants. with their
two great pitchers, Marquard and
Alatthewson. and an aggregation of
base runners that are the marvel of
the baseball world
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
EDUCATION Is CHANGING.

Ihe time Tor IneOreLlc educdl1On Is
past. What is wanted now is practi-
cal education. The teaching of Ian
guages is passing away and more use
full things are being substituted The
change is good. There has been an
idea out that education was something
that was hard to get and could not be
used afterwards. What is wanted is
an education that you take with you,
not one that you lock up in your brain
and let out only upon occasion. Edu-
cation is changing and of right it
ought to change. There has been too
much underbrush for the size of the
tree.-Lawrence JournaI-World.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Special dispatches to the Chicago
and New York papers say that Presi-
dent Taft has been greeted by the larg-
est throngs of his trip IN progress
sive Kansas" But the insurgent Re-
publicans insist that there is nothing
of political significance in this. The
discerning newspaper correspondents
with the president. representing the
largest newspapers in the country,
seem to think otherwise
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Something refreshing in the way of
news from the local divorce court is
to the effect that eight Topeka couples
who have been parties to divorce suits
filed during the past few months have
kissed and made up. II Kansas Is to
continue with its easy divorce laws,
courts of arbitration should be estab-
lished for the settlement of domestic
differences. Many divorces are sought
for no good and sufficient reasons. and
many more of them would be discon-
tinued if there was judicious pouring
of oil on the troubled waters.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Encouraging news for the consum-
ers: Professor Wallace of Des Moines
told the conservationists assembled at
Kansas City that the lowest permanent
level in the price of food had been
reached. In other words. he thinks
the high prices of the present era are
here to stay.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

though. that LaFoHette INDUCED in a
speech-making tour OF Kansas. 1t is
safe to say that ninety-five per cent
of his audiences would be on hand
merely to satisfy their curiosity. But
the Republican insurgents would be
loud in their insistence that Kansans
had gone wild for LaFoIette
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

A few of the insurgent Republicans
in Kanass. and one or two of their
newspaper organs, are insisting
that there is not the slightest po-
1iticaI significance to the large crowds
of Kansans who have turned out to
greet Mr.. Taft They say that this en-
thusiasm of the people of Kansas for
Mr.. Taft is merely a patriotic demon
stration in honor of the president of
the United States Just suppose,
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR
[From the New York Press.]

[From the New YORK Press.J
After all, lunacy in a man is only
somebody else's opinion.
A man will take a bigger risk with
his soul than with his money.
The reason a man has a hobby IS SO
he can be disgusted If you want to
talk to him about yours
A woman thinks she eats no more
than a bird just because it is ice cream
and cake instead of potatoes.
Being generous at your fathers ex-
pense is lot more satisfactory than
having your son generous at your ex
pense.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

For the benefit of any one who may
be interested and who possibly is not
aware of the fact, it is hereby an
ncunced for the first and last time in
these columns that pawpaws are ripe.
Delectableness is added to pawpaws by
eating green persimmons with them.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

This much is certain. The picture
Of Robert f Peary as it is painted by
Dr.. Cook can scarcely be described as
being attractive in any detail
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

These are busy days for the Dove
of Peace. And it is asking almost too
much to expect that lone bird to get
around to all the places where it is
needed at one and the same time.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Now comes denial that the steel
trust will dissolve. Judge Gary,
chairman of the board of directors of
United States Steel corporation, says it
is not an illegal combination. Others
may be pardoned for holding a differ
ent opinion.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

At the annual convention of the
Kansas Retail Butchers association,
held in this city. there was also dis
cussion and suggestions concerning
better ways and means for it's mem
bcrs to make both ends meet
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The less said about the efforts of
Kansas avenue business men and prop
erty owners to decorate for any occa-
sion the better
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Italy has addressed a pointed note
TO Turkey concerning her desires in
respect to TripoH. And in case the
pen in this instance should not prove
effective. Italy's sword appears to be
ready for action.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

The Galveston News idea of a re-
sourceful woman is one who can stand
her family skeleton in a corner of the
parlor and make folks believe it is
bric-a-brac
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
FOOLING THE PEOPLE.

A certain patent medicine man has
a remedy for dyspepsia. It is very
popular, and the manufacturer is get
ting rich. The directions provide
few common sense rules for diet, and
these are insisted upon, if the medi-
provide for simple diet, eating slowly,
hot water a half hour before each
meal, etc. The simple rules of diet
help the patients, and they recover;
the medicine does them no good. But
the curious part of the story is that
the patients are writing letters thank
ing the patent medicine manufacturer
They cure themselves, and thank the
patent medicine man, in addition to
paying him money! 1t is a smart trick
but it is quite common for Americans
to do things for themselves, and give
others the credit.-Ed. Howe in his
Monthly Magazine for September.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
FROM OTHER PENS
ARE CRIMINALS.

Though a coroner's jury has made
the charge of wilful murder against
Gillette, the Florida Shaker who took
it upon himself to confer "euthanasia'
by means of chloroform on a member
of his community to whom life had
become, in his and her opinion, a
burden too heavy to bear, there is
hardly a possibility that the man will
ever be convicted of this crime.
That he is legally guilty of murder,
on his own admissions of fact, there is
not the slightest doubt; certain is it,
too, that what he did is without moral
justification, and that to cOndOne his
exercise of the power to kill the sick,
which is in the hands of every nurse,
related or unrelated, would lead
straight to many mistakes more or
less terrible and to many crimes more
or less horrible. But in this particular
case the mans intentions were pre-
sumably good, he gained no personal
advantage from his act, he took life
openly, and he has made no denials,
but accepts full responsibility for what
he did. Nobody is going to send him
to the gallows.
Both he and his accomplice, how
ever should go to Jail. They exercised
private judgment in a matter beyond
the domain of private judgment
sufferingS they deemed hopeless may
not have been so-were not, if the re-
ports as to the autopsy findings are
correct-and the consent of their vic
tim, of which they make so much in
their eXculpation, was the product of
diagnosis even less competent than
their own.-New York Times.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
KANSAS COAAENT
sHEAPBNING MATRIMoNY.

CHEAPENING MATRIMONY.
Kincaid, in Allen county, is going
to do a little part in making matri-
mony vaudeville stunt 1t is offer
Ing a free marriage license and the
services of a clergyman to any couple
that viii be married on the grounds
of the farmers annual fair.
Kincaid probably doesn't stop to
think what a mock this is making Of
marriage, for hundreds of other fairs
have done the same thing, year after
year, but Kincaid is doing a vicious
act when it endeavors to line up
couple, entering into the solemn and
sacred precincts of marriage, along
dog peddler, the merry -go-round and
red lemonade
Marriage is getting to be too cheap
anyhow in this country without try
ing to make a popular sport of it,
along with horseshoes and cane racks
Instead of the beauty and solemnity
and religious atmosphere that should
prevail at such an occasion, the Kin
caid fair would substitute the raucous
voice of the ballyho man and the
frivolous feeling of a fair. 1t would
su bstitute the rag time of the hurdy-
march, and would plunge the young
people into life contract with the
flippancy that characterized the
American people out for a careless
holiday.
Weddings are not popular sports
despite the attitude taken toward them
by the aristocracy of Newport and
New York. It's a lifetime business
that ought to start off with thought
fulness and all the sympathetic feel
ing and helpfulness of friends and
reIa tives. 1t isn't real good form to put
such sacred rites into competition
with side shows and street fair takers.
OTTAWA Republic.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28
BY CLAW AND FANG.


When it comes to a diversity in vital
statistics India certainly assumes the
lead. The natives of that weird land,
especially those of the northern pro-
vinces, not only die from unusual nat
uraI causes, the plague, for instance,
and famine, but they are frequently
cut off by wild animals and poison
Gus serpents-
Residents of those favored lands
which know no jungle terrors, will
scarcely credit the amazing totals
which the British departm entail Off
cials have made public in this connec-
ton. During 1910, according to the
statistics, more than %, 600 persons
were killed by wild animals and pois-
onous serpents, and strange to say,
this is the highest record since 1907.
The number of cattle killed by these
creatures of the jungle was close to
$4,000, a prodigious loss for the na-
tive owners, whose goods and chattels
are few.
OF course the natives made repri-
sails. Hunting parties were frequent
ly sent out. man-eating tigers were
tracked and trapped, marauding ele-
plants We're driven back. But it was
against the serpent tribe that the man
of the rice fields warred with great
est vigor. In 1910 the natives slew
more than 10, 600 elephants. tigers,
1eopards, bears, wolves and hyenas
and nearly $1,000 snakes.-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Shrewd Boy-Want a situation as er-
randboy, do your Well. can you tell me
how far the moon IL from the earth, eh Z?
reckon 1t amt close enough to Interfere
with me running errands. He got the job.
Christian Register.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

Has he done anything since he went
70 the LestslatureT' f'You bet he has.
He has made a record" Funny hadn't
heard anything OF H.. You viii. He So
dlotaphone concealed in the room. ''-Ious-
ton Daily Post.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

A Most Unusual Way.-Jorkins-Ffop
did you ever come to possess such a shah
oy-looking umbrella as that2 Dorkfns-
Why got this umbrella in q very Pc
culiar way 1 bought it.-Exchange.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

First Ilustrator-Great Scott. mani
you're painting that apple an awful sizei
Second Ditto-I know it. It's to be used
In nursery stock catalogue.-Judge.
The Topeka state journal., 1911-09-28

A Mean Brother.-She-Mau twin
brother annoys her dreadfuIly. He-Tfow ?
She-You see, everybody knows they are
twins, and poor Maud can't pass FOR only
q, because he tells people he's 30.-EN-