Arizona republican., 1911-01-21
HORRID MAN.
The Southern Family Really Had No
 Sense of Humor.

You say the new family is a south
 ern family?" asked Mrs. Jones of her
 neighbor. Then I don't believe I shaI
 call upon them. Not that I haven't q
 great deal of admiration for southern
 CTS as d class-oh, my. no-but you sec well, they are so different from the rest of us, don't you know? I am sure that Mir. Jones would not approve of
 my calling on them, and as for Tommy
 the dear child, I shall give him strict orders. to keep off the block that they live on.
 You see. We once had a southern family in the neighborhood with us. and l shudder yet at their dOings. They have no sense of humor at all-none at all-actually
 Our little Tommy. who is just as sweet child as the world ever saw well. it was all because of his innocent desire for amusement The idea of get ting so perfectly wild over the mere playfulness of a child.
 But I haven't told you.
 You know they had an artificial pond in their yard and they stocked it with goldfish of quite a respectabl size and, of course. q little boy does not know anything about private ponds or of goldfish being for ornament rather than use-all normal boys do that I should hate tO think Tommy was not normal. Don't rip the lining out of Mrs. Smiths huff. Tommy Isn't he cute? Where was I?
 "Oh. yes. Tommy came home one Iax and his chin skinned. and his eyes were SD red that I knew in moment that he had been crying or something So his pa questioned him in order to find out the cause of his looking as he did. and you know, MT. Jones is rather stricter with Tommy sometimes than he should be, so Tommy was afraid of being whipped so naturally told what wasn't exactly true.
 He said that this MT. Peyton had met him just as he was coming out of the school yard and had thrown him down so hard that he had skinned his chin on the sidewalk. and when he tried to run this MT. Peyton had grabbed his coat and torn it up the back. and then spanked him, all without cause.
 T declare. MT Jones was furious simply furious! He went and got an old fashioned rawhide whip-perhaps you have seen it. for it hangs in his den for an ornament-and he coiled it up under his coat and started out to inter view MT. Peyton. Mir. Jones is a rag ing lion when his temper is aroused and I felt sorry for MT. Peyton, even if he had whipped our child.
 But I did not try to dissuade NIT. Jones-for. of course. MT Peyton would have deserved it.
 Well, Mir. Jones rang the door Dell and Mrs. Peyton came to the door and pa asked if MT Peyton was in, and Mrs. Peyton said he was and invited Mir. Jones in, but of course he would not go. He said that he would prefer to have MT. Peyton step outside. so Mrs. Peyton went in and MT. Peytou stepped put. and as soon as pa had asked him a few questions the whole story came put.
 Tt seemed that Tommy had not at tended school at all. but had made him q pinhook and had some worms. bo like. and had got tin can and had gone in and fisned all the goldfish out of the artificial pond. Then he tried to run away when NIT. Peyton attempted to catch him and he knocked down and broke a valuable jarliniere with fern In 1t. Then when Mir PeytOn caught the frightened child by the coat the coat was torn and Tommy. who IS very spirited child. called Mir. Peyton some name-I am sure he did not know the meaning of it-and MT. Peyton him and spanked him.
 Well. Mir Jones was awfullv mortl- fled. sand he apologiZed to Mir. Peyton and they shook hands. Then-you know, MT. Jones hasn't much tact-pa laughed and said as he pulled the whip put from beneath his coat: It's good thing for you I took the time to near TOUT explanation. for l had come over 1ere fully determined to give you this
 "Then-and it is this that makes me listrust southerners - Mir. Peyton reached back beneath his coat tail and produced a dreadful revolver-as big as , young cannon-and replied: Yes, sir t is a good thing for one of us, Slr. for
 am always prepared for any little personal difficulty, sir
 As I said, that is the reason o"h are much for sOutherners. If pa hau ;truck him with the whip MT. Peyton night have shot pa.
 ''The idea!"-Chicago News.