davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
No,,r Vacation,


II Is well for a man to respect MS
own vocation, whatever 1t is, ana TO
think himself bound to uphold II anu
to claim for 1t the respect 1t deserves
Charles Dickens.
"One of the astronomers claims that
ba has charted 10000 new worlds"
.Ey George, it's remarkable!'
sNot so very when you consider the
fact that he has the use of the largest
telescope in the world"
Il wasn't thinking of that. Wna1
consider strange is that with SO many
other worlds in existence the lady who
is acting as stepmother for my cnli-
dren had to light on this one.'-Cm'
cago Record Herald.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
GREETINGS To ASSEMBLY

Louisville, KY, May 22-Special -
The section of the National Assembly
of Southern Presbyterians was en-
livened to-day by a message from the
Cumberland Presbyterians in session
at Evansville, which contains what
was believed to be hit at the north
ern Presbyterians, with whom the
Cumberland Presbyterians do not al
filiate. The message contained II is
said reference to verse in the Blple
which is found to read as follows:
"Finally, brethren, pray for us tha'
the word of the Lord may have tret
course even rs it is with you and tna'
we may be delivered from unreasonable
and wicked men and all men who nave
not faith"
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
carrv;no a Stretcher.

The bearers of stretcher should De
as near the same height as possible
If there is any difference the taller
and stronger man should be at the
head. A stretcher should be carried
by the hands or suspended by straps
from the shoulders. Never carry
stretcher when loaded upon the snoui-
ders. It frightens the patient. ana ne
might fall off very easily. especially II
one of the bearers should stumble. Inc
bearers should not keep step. but break
step. the one in front starting on WIN
his right foot and the one behind wltn
his left. The injured should be car
ried feet first. In going up hill or up
stairs the head should be In front anu
the reverse in descending, except III
case of a broken thigh or leg, wnen
the feet should be first in going up ana
last in coming down to keep tne
weight of the body off the ln1ureo
limb.-"First Aid to the Injured" Dr
d. Il. Hartung, in National Magazine
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
-. :
p,--iad tke EnoIishman.

A.Philadelphian who had been enter
tanning friend from London for sew
eral days noticed that his guest ap-
pearea to be in deep thought at dinner
the other evening. whats the mat
terY' he asked, fearing that the Eng
lishman was Ill or worried or home
sick. 'I'm rawther puzzled, old chap,
replied the Londoner. Il really Gavin
make OUT what the blawsted pounuei
meantS 1 was lost in your city the
other day, and 1 dropped into an apart
ment house to ask my way. A ieAoW
was loading freight on bally lift.
awsked him, Me good man, can you
tell me how far down is Spruce street!
And that fellow said, I don't know
old top; my elevator only runs to tht
basement Now, what the dickens dlt
that bloke mean? ?"-Philadelphia Rec
ord.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
SHAVING IS NOT FATAL
BARRIERS Nowadays Do Not Use Ham,
mers and Gold Chisels.

BARRIERS Nowadays Do Not Use Ham,
mers and Gold Chisels.
In reply to correspondent who says
he yearns to have his flowing beard
removed and yet lacks the Spartan
frmless of the early martyrs to face
the ordeal and makes a pathetic ap-
peal for advice the afalfa editor OF
the Emporia Gazette unfeelhgly re-
marks:
"The alfalfa editor can offer no ad-
vice or encoura cement to such trem-
bling soul. 1t seems probable that he
has worn his whiskers for many years.
It Is likely that he hasn't purchased a
shave for q quarter Of century ana
therefore is ignorant Of the improve
ments in the art tonsorial which have
been achieved In recent years. IL IS
no longer like going through a slaugn-
ter house to an open grave to be shaV-
ed by an expert barber. In fact, that
operation has been SO shorn of its ter
rors that many eminent citizens con-
slider it q pleasure to visit the barber.
It is no longer necessary to strap
patfent down in the chair before shaw
ing him; neither is it necessary to ad-
minister anaesfhetics to,his whiskers.
"The man whose only reason for
wearing whiskers is the fact that he
fears the barber shop viii gain little
sympathy. If he tries to explain that
he cannot shave himself without suf-
fering the agonies of the all fired he
will gain less. Such excuses might
have had some force long ago, when
BARRIERS used hammers and cold CHS
els. but science has made giant strides
in recent years, and the country Is tull
of painless BARRIERS, and a clean shave
costs no anguish or Inconvenience"
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Attacks School Principal

A severe attack on school principal,
Chas. B. Allen of Sylvania, Ga, Is
thus told by him. "For more than
three years." he writes, 81 suffered In,
describabIe torture from rheumatlsm-
liver and stomach trouble and dis
eased kidneys. All remedies failed till
, used Electric Bitters, but four bot
Ties of this wonderful remedy cured
me completely" Such results are
oommon. Thousands bless them fol
curing stomach trouble, female com
plants, kidnev disorders, biliousnes'
and for new health and vigor. Try
them. Only SOC at B. F. Hughes.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
225 CH|NAMEN ARE
| KILLED BY MEX|CANs
SLAUGHTER is FIERCE
Appeal to Washington Follows
Desperate Encounter Between
Celestials And Natives

Eagle Pass, Tex, May 22.-Speclai
In desperate fight between Mexl-
can insurrectos and Cinnamon at Tor
recn 225 Cinnamon were killed.
This information was received here
today by Sam Wash, owner Of the In
ternational Hotel at Cludad. Porhro
Dlaz, across the river from here.
Details of the reported slaughter
have not reached here, except that OF
the number ofChinamen killed SO were
Wash's ranchmen. Wash has tele-
g5apned' Wais! 'he stser ,o4ection. m,aio'e' az
Aususs,.ss Uhss May 22.-Efforts to
r,eace in the South have failed.
General Enrique Zapata, Figuerora's
chief ally, refused to see peace ENJOYS
from the Government when they
reached his camp yesterday, and wher
they returned last night they wer'
kicked out of his headquarters
Zadara has 1000 men and has repu
dated Madero completely, declaring
that if Figueroa followed Madero hi
own forces would maintain the revo
| ution-
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Impartial.

Professor G. Alphonso Smith once
wrote an English grammar. The BOOK
was published while DR.. Smith was
teaching at the University OF North
Carolina. One day he received from
a farmer a letter containing the follow
ing:
II am glad somebody. has written an
impartial grammar at last"
DIR. Smith Immediately wrote to the
farmer asking what he meant by an
"iionartial grammar" The answer
was:
"You give the children this sentence
TO parse: One Confederate killed ter
Yankees New York Post.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
WARMING Before Command.


In bringing up my children I found
that at night when they were tired
they were spared many tears by being
/ warned before I gave them a strict
command. Instead of saying 'Now it
is time to go to bed. Put away your
blocks at once" l would say. ut Is
nearly time to go to bed. Finish your
house first and then put away your
blocks" In this way the children
we're fully prepared to go, and there
was consequently no begging and no
temptation for me to show my lack
Of frmness by being persuaded to al
low them to build "just one more
house."
Imagine mother in the midst OF ar
absorbing chapter being told by one ir
higher authority to put down her boob
at once and go to bed. Would it not
save a frown Of impatience to be tolt
to finish the chapter first?-Harper's
Bazaar.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
MILLION DOLLAR DAM IN RUINS

YUMA, Ariz., May, 22.-The 81, ,O0o,-
600 dam just completed by the United
Statss Government in Mexico, to con-
troll the water of the Colorado river,
has been rendered practically useless
by break in the Bee river leeve ABOVE
it. It is feared the entire lower I'M
perial valley will be flooded, and the
great irrigation systems established
there at enormous cost ruined.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Willy WILLIE PUTS
ONE OVER ON GANG
Lulls Guards to Sleep With Fancy
Story Then Makes Clean Get
Au,ax, Without Difficulty

AWAY Without Difficulty
After having enjoyed life of affluent
ease marred by no exertion however
slight it was hardly to be expected that
the sort of thing that is put up to mem
bers of the chain gang would have
appealed to William-he notified the
papers to stop calling him just Bill
Easton. Naturally, then, not a great
deal of surprise was felt MONDAY after
noon when it was learned that William
had told the gang farewell.
1t was along about 4 o'clock when
William decided that the weed he had
just pulled was the last weed he was
going to pull tow ard improving the ap-
pearance of Gooch Street, Sears HILL
Having arrived at this conclusion he
managed his escape by gaining from
his guards permission to 60 some dis
tance away from where the rest OF tht
gang was toiling for some purpose OF
other. Then, having thus gained ad
vantage of a start, he beat it away.
Easton had served just about a weel
of the sixty days to which he wa
sentenced when he was found guilt.
in the corporation court OF having pre-
cured money under false pretence
from county man.
Down about the court house corne
last night friends were offering odd
that William won't be gone week
He lust won't be able to stay ava
from the old town, they said. Non
of these same friends, however, wa
, willing to speculate on just how man
additional days will be tack ed on I
the unfinished sixty when Williar
, does come back.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Has Millions Of Friends

How would you like to number your
friends by millions as Bucklen's Ar
MICA Salve does? Its astounding cures
in the past forty years made them:
Its the best Salve in the world tor
sores, ulcers, eczema, burns, boils,
scalds, cuts, corns, sore eyes, spralns,
swellings, bruises, cold sores Has nc
equaJ for piles. Csc at B. F. Hughes
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26

problem Of their relative rank. The
one arrayed in the giddiest garment
seems usually to win.
If there is small choice in color and
cost between the pink costume of one
and the blue costume of the other
the one with the straightest hair stands
fast and the other walks round, some
times with grunts and comments soto
voce.
Or. all details seeming equal, they
face each other and glare until the one
with least nerve willis, swerves into an
adjacent doorway, and the victorious
one sweeps by with uptilted chin and
exultant petticoats.-Irene A. Wrights
MCnha"
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
TOO MANY ACES

Kittanning, Pa, May o.
Three men were murdered
and one fatally shot during
a quarrel over agame of cards
at Kay lor, last night. Dick
Sendrino, a miner, it is alleg-
ed, shot and killed his broth
er, Charles Sendrino, and
Andrew and Rocco Leopold
Braltis, two brothers, and al
so fatally wounded Walter
Spilish.
1t is claimed that during
the game. five aces were found
in a deck of cards with which
the men were playing poker.
Dick was suspected and was
given a beating. He reveng-
ed himself by firing into the
crowd, and then fled.
A large band of angry
miners today is hunting the
fugitive.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26

DIfhGult HORSEBACK Tedts
There are no better horsemen In the
world than the cavalry officers OF the
Italian army. yet even among them
there are very few, who could perform
the feat achieved by one of them. 10
run an ordinary foot race Is easy
enough, but to run at full speed Tor
several hundred yards holding In one
hand a spoon on which rests an egg
and to reach the goal without dropping
the egg is feat which must be prac
ticed carefully a long time before 1t
can be performed successfully, and as
a result there are not many who can
be sure of accomplishing it whenever
they try. Great, therefore, was the
surprise when an italian officer mount
ed on horseback performed this difti-
cult feat. Moreover. he selected a
course in which there were two OF
three high fences, and these he cleared
at full gallop without losing the egg.
A Curiosity of Sound.
If when riding in balloon at
height, say, of 1900 feet a charge OF
guncotton be fired electrically 100 fee
below the car, the report, though really
as loud as a cannon, sounds no mor'
than a pistol shot, possibly partly
owing to the greater rarity of the an
but chiefly because the sound havina
no background to reflect 1t, s1mpi!
spends itself in the air. Then, Away
and under all conditions Of atmosphere
there ensues absolute silence until IN
time for the echo back from earth ma
fully elapsed, when deafening ou'
} burst of thunder rises from DeloW
rolling on often for more than halt
minute.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
WAR OF THE WALKS.
Humors of the Right of Way on the
Streets of Havana.

Streets of Havana.
Between 2 and o'clock in the after
noon Havana begins to revive from
the lull which falls at about II, for,
although this city no longer frankly
retires to sleep the siesta as she ought.
she does doze duly in the motionless
thick heat of midday.
After 8 one sees ladies venturing
forth in twos and threes to the streets
where the best shops are. This is the
hour in which to witness, if one has
eyes and humor for it, whole series
Of comic occurrences.
Havana's sidewalks are narrow
and their lack Of width gives rise tc
some local customs and deal of heart
burning. One does not keep hard te
the right, regardless, in approaching
another person travelling along tht
narrow tagging in the opposite dlrec
ton. One must take under advise
ment sex, age, color and present condl
ton of servitude as blazoned forth TO-
all to read in the details Of persona
attire.
Men usually give women the insid'
of the walk, stepping down whel
necessary to let them pass. Serving
people, regardless of age and sex, AM
all others who so humble themselve
as to carry packages are expected t
Weld the walks to their superlors, wn
than are ahOut everybody they meet.
frequently, Of course. it is difhcul
to make. IN the flash of turning COZ
ner all the nice calculations requlslt
to deciding who shall have the wal
and who shall surrender it.
know of nothing funnier than t
watch two fairly well dressed and col
pulent Cuban ladies determining, a
they stand tottering, face to face on
foot wide tagging. the whole dellcat
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Aarkino Back.

"You were telling Miss Gaussip this
morning that you were going to be
married again, weren't your said the
shrewd man.
"Why, yes" the widower gasped IN
surprise. ."How did you know"
"After you left her she began to
count ON her fingers" - Philadelphia
Press.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Whera Honesty Failed.

"You are still having trouble In your
search for an honest manY'
"Yes," replied Diogenes. There are
plenty who are scrupulous aboutfbusi-
ness and politics. But l have never
vet found a man so honest that ne
wouldn't try to ring in a portrait taken
when he was ten years younger wnen
YOU ask him for a picture for publlca'
on."-Washington Star.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
ELECTRIC LINE FROM
HERE To WAYNEsbUR0
MAY SOON BE BUILT
Engineers Have Surveyed Route
And Prepared Plans Which
Capitalists Are Considering

Tentative plaus are bsing considered
for the bnildjng Of an electric railway
line betwe Stanton and Wsynes-
boro. That the project gives sub
stantial promise Of being carried out
is shown by the fact that an engineer
has already been sent over the pro-
posed routs anr is now engaged in
preparing estimates, while land own
ers have bsen approached concerning
a right of way.
When s,sn yesterday and asked for
information J. III. SPOTS. president OF
the Blue Ridge Light and Power COM
pan,, stated thst he wonld prefer not
TO disc ass any plans he might have
knowledge of ipj connection with the
proposed Stauh.on -Waynesboro line.
He did confirm, however, the report
tnat the building of the line is being
considered and that J. F. Casssll, en
gineel Of his company. ls now prepaI'
ing estimates of what the cost OF the
ests nlishment of the road woult be.
Besides denying chat company had
been organized TO back tina enterprise
Mr.. Spots wonld have nothing else te
say.
From county msn living between
here and Waynesboro and along the
route the line would most probably
follow it il learned that an agent ha'
been active in ascartaining senti
ment III the county with reference tt
the line. From this SANE sourcs
was furthsr learned that 50 far. TIN
land owners approaohs1 had show
not only interest, bat enthusiasm a
we'll In the project and had PROMISE
to grant the desired right Of wa
through their lana at very reasonabl
cost to the promoters.
While this part of the report coul
nos bs confirmed at first hand yeste,
day it is practically known that tn
| proposed line connecting Staunto
and Waynesboro has thu interest an
promised backing Of Stsunton men
wealth, who in the past have show
their willingness 10 entpr into an
t business proposition that sened
7 offer as fair q chance OF returns as IL
one now in hand. Waynesboro al;
M bers among its citizens men
: wealth and enterprise. who Won
' naturally be expected to become il
8 tsrested in this venture and who
;, assistance would likely De soug
Q and most probably secured.
: For years there has been talk
, building an inserurban trolley syste
q with Staunton as the central poin
put heretofore this plans have pr
Qressed no further than talk The
never has been any question that 81
= system wouli pay; the trouble b
- - pesn in getting the right men
h terested in 1t.
m Now for the first TINS since
Y. birth of the IDEA a good many yei
ago there seems real proDabil
IN that something will be done, Il
belief being based on the facts viii
10 have already bean set forth. Oh
~ among winch is that the right n
are in on the deal
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
WANT PURE ICE CREAM

Yonkers, N. Y, May o.
The recent death of two
children from ptomaine pois-
oning, the serious illness OF a
third child and reports from
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. OF sever
al hundred cases of severe
stomach trou BILE am ng
children has caused the board
of health to obtain samples
of ice cream, ice cream cones
and waters from all dealers
in the city and chemists are
making an analysis to deter
mine whether they contain
impurities.
The health board is pre-
pairing a code of regulations
more strict than that in force
in any city in the country I or
the government and inspect
ion OF the 200 ice cream deal
ers in Yonkers.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
A Snake Story.

This story is told Of the late DR..
Emil Reich One day when travelling
he lay down to rest in the shadow of
a bush and fell asleep. He awoke with
a start to find that night was coming
on and that rain had begun to fall.
Quickly snatching up bis umbrella, he
tried to open it and, finding it worked
stif1y, he pressed the spring vigorous.
ly. Suddenly there was a sound OF
ripping and tearing and snake fell tc
the ground split in two. The reptile
had apparently swallowed the umbrel
la as far as 1t could!
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Iarnast leo River.

The great antarctic river discovered
by Lieutenant Shackleton is the largest
ice river known and represents the
only visible outflow from the vast Ice
sheet of the southern continent. This
the Beardmore glacier descends 6Ooo
feet between sandstone hills ana IS
100 miles long by so wide. The NAL
aspina glacier in Alaska covers nearly
66O square miles, Himalayan glaciers
reach a length of twenty miles,; ana
the longest Alpine glacier is sixteen
miles.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
INDISPENSABLE.

"That banquet tonight can't get
along without me-"
"You have a pretty good opinion OF
yourself. Billed for a speech"
"Oh, no. was invited to LISTEN
Louisville COurier-Journal.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
or;o;naI Err. Of Good Feeling.

The phrase applied to the administra-
ton of James Monroe, 1.-The era of
good feeling" first appeared in a Bos-
ton newspaper. the Columbian Sentinel
Of July 10. 1917. From that time until
the present hour the two adm1nistra-
tions of Monroe-a period of eight
years, 1717 to 1825-are referred to In
the terms of the newspaper paragraph
which so aptly expressed the public
sentiment of the day.-Magazine OF
American History.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26

P.snniun, On Marriaae.

In Belgium they place premium on
marriage by allowing a married man
two votes at an election as against
the single mans enc. In Madagascar
one must be a father or pay for the
default. If man is unmarried OF
childless at the age Of twenty-five he
must contribute annually S3.75 to the
support of the state, and each woman
who has remained Single OF. is child
less at twenty-four is taxed $3.50 per
yeaS - -.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
ALeoaI CompIime1,t. I

Eyes, young Coke handled krne case
magnificently. He proved beyond the
possibility Of doubt that thal accused
man wasn't guilty"
"But he was guilty, of seourse."-
Cleveland Plain Dealer
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26

speak s6f friendly match" not
at all forgetting that dictum OF the
old Scot to- whom his opponent, break
ing some trivial rule, said, Il suppose
you w0nt claim that in f1enaiy
matcn| "rriendly matchG was the
repl-y "There's no such thing at golf?'
~, nndon Telegraph.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
A Matter of Luck.

bad luck is sometimes good luck"
"Ridiculousv'
"Not at all. Did you eter get club
to fill heart flush and afterward fais-
cover that some one else hadl Y full
ouse?"-Detroft Free Press. Z.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
The Lesson.

He-Yes, it's very true. man ooesn
learn what happiness is until he's mar
ried. She-I'm glad you've discovered
that at last. He-Yes. and when nes
married it's too late.-Dorfbarbier.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Too Strong.

"My boy tells me you discharged
him" said the late Office boys mother
sYou advertised for strong boy, and
I certainly thought he was strong
enough"
"Madam," replied the merchant, "he
was too strong. He broke all the rules
of the Office and some of the furniture
In the two days he was with u.s."
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
~
Courage.

Courage that grows from constltu'
tion often forsakes the man when ne
has occasion for it; courage which
arises from a sense OF duty acts ID q
uniform manner.-Addison
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26

His Wife-This paper tells OF Wo-
man who suffered two weeks from the
effects of a mosquito bite. Her Hus-
band-That's nothing. I know man
who has suffered for years from the
effects of a henpeck.-Chicago News
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1911-05-26
Keen Sense of Smf IL

The aborigines of Peru can in the
darkest night and in the thi hkest woods
distinguish respectively white man,
a negro and one Of their pwn race by
the sense of smell.