Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-02-14
DALLAS DENIES DAUBS
BELIEVES IN BARRING BALEFUL
AND BAMBOOzLING BILLBOARD
City Calmly Comemplatess Creations
Commendable Compositions, Care
less of Grass Commercialisrn.

In these days of degeneration and
legislation, when the demon grip
stalks abroad in the land, and no man
| knoweth whence it cometh or when it
will return, it is pleasant to turn aside
from the cares that infest the day and
steal away. 1t is no crime to steal
away, or even a right of way, but it is
not best to do it right away, anyway.
Having stolen a weigh, or even
whey it will be found desirable, and
| perhaps necessary, to return. Hav-
ing returned, many things will be APP
parent that were not so before. One
of the most apparent of these is that
Dallas is not as other towns are, and
she is therefore entitled to lift up her
voice and sound her own praises. Any
one who will buy ticket, pay for it,
and ride over the Southern Pacific be-
tween Portland and Dallas, will see
why.
A jogging Journey.
In that journey of 6S miles, count
ing wggles, there are about fifteen
collections of houses and other build
ings, commonly called towns In
practically every one of these the trail
of the billboard color expert shows
glaringly over all. From the time he
strikes the city limits in the northeast
corner till he leaves the southernmost
environs, his progress is marked by
panorama of pigmentary paroxysms
that uprises suddenly from the scenery
and swats him in the eye, and paral-
Yves the optic nerve and drives it out
through the back of the head. Great
spasms of art dodge out from the
townscape and PROSTATE the anterior
quadrigemianal. On every side there
is the riotous rhapsody of an irrepres-
sible aurora borealis gone wrong.
When the traveller looks forth from
his luxuriously cushioned seat to gaze
in admiration upon the sunset splen-
dors of Mt. Hood, the revered, an acre
of plane surface cuts off his view, and
informs him that the world now
smokes "Smello the new medicated
five-cent cigar" and when he gets
through reading that, Mt Hood is be-
hind a hill.
Just as he stretches forth his neck
to catch a glimpse of pretty lawn
that contains real rockery, that is
too lovely for anything, barn shuts
off the vision, and huge chromatic
alteration, emblazoned on it's side,
vividly proves to him the value of
'Satin's Fun-Proof Saints"
ReVerieS I'm Red
A little further along he is capti-
waited by a charming brunette lowell
ness in red. At the very instant that
it was about to smile, a dead wall
rushes up and he finds himself con-
fronted by a yelping sea of yellow,
that makes him aware of the virtues
of 'Anut Agatha's Balm of Bunco," il
taken at the right time And so the
reel unwinds.
Dallas nesting peacefully amid her
hills, has almost entirely
the rava ging hand of the tour
ing paint singer Her barns are built
for other uses, and there is not dead
wall in the town to mar the beauty of
her vistas. Even along the tributary
rural roads, the sacreligious sign is
seldom seen, and Nature remains un-
punctuatcd with protruding paint.
Travellers note this, ahd when they
90 hence they speak we'll of it.
Science has proved that the ptero-
lactyle is extinct, and the accumulat-
I'd wisdom and experience-dearly
paid for of the largest commercial
proves that billboard
ADVERTISING is obsolete, and belongs in
he same category with the dinosau-
'us and other Mesozoic inctums of
prehistoric times.