Mrs. Grundy. (Tracy City, Tenn.) 1903-1930, 1911-02-16

Didn't call the t.srn?" wills
pered to Clara j. Put Uncle Peter
wise to Murf's condition and tell him
not 10 make any breaks"
Uncle Peter scowled fiercely at me
and Joined Clara j., while | shook
Murf's hand and lied how glad ! was
to see him.
This here old man is 20 uncle.
subj" Murf inquired.
My wife's uncle" / replied
That's some bettah, sub; being
no blood relation, it WORT hut yo'
pride so much when l tell yo' all that
he has lightning bugs in his hayloft,"
Murf said, earnestly.
What has the old gentleman done
to you, Murf?" | inquired.
Done, subj" shifted Murf, con.
temptuously; when l info'm him,
sub, tht | had brought seven bosses
on from Kaintucky for yo' all he be-
gan to froth at the mouth, sub! And
when l told him that yo' Uncle Owen
went oVah the final and full co'se be-
lieving that yo' all was big Casino on
the Eastern tracks, sub, that old
truck boss laughed in my face, sub.
I permit some few people to use their
laugh on me, pussonally, but allow
no one, sub, to laugh at yo' Uncle
Owens beliefs, now that is too ever
lasting late to change them, subj"
Good old Murf, you mustn't mind
Uncle Peter; he's sun-tounched," l
said, tapping my forehead signifi-
cantly.
oh" said Murf; "locoed?"
Plum, on the horse question"
answered; "but otherwise as harm
less as kitten. He was kicked on
the forehead some years ago by
roadster, and now even the mention
Talk automobiles to him, Murf, and
be on the safe side"
Il reckon yo all best excuse me
from any automobile talk" said Murf,
earnestly. Il nevah hope to see the
day, sub, when one of them foolish
wagons can rise high enough in my
esteem to be talked about I'm a
hossman, and from Kaintucky, subj"
At that moment, Clara j., Aunt
Martha, Uncle Peter and Tacks ap-
peared. and 1t was evident from their
actions that family council in re-
gard to Murf's supposed mental con.
dition had just adjourned pending
further investigation.
The two ladies remained at safe
distance and whispered together sym.
pathetcally from time to time, while
Tacks armed himself with a rock and
prepared for the worst
But the hit Of the show was Uncle
Peter, He danced around Murf with
broad grin on his face and bowed
extravagantly.
Murf sided up to me. did yo'
hoarsely.
Perfectly SOL" l answered; "hu-
NOR him, though"
Uncle Peter called me aside. Sure
he's harmless" he asked. eagerly.
Perfectly So" / told him; but
humor him"
The two eyed each other and began
to grin foolishly. 1t was my cue to
crack rib. but / had to keep a
straight face or lose the fight,
Presently Uncle Peter and Murf
were strolling around the lawn to-
gether, the former laying himself out
trying to be pleasant, while the latter
kept watching his companion out Of
the corner of his eye.
joined Clara ]. and Aunt Martha
to tell them that the visitor was as
docile as pet lamb. when suddenly
an awful yell caused us to turn quick
ly, and we beheld Uncle Peter down
on the lawn kicking furiously, while
Murf sat on his chest and swatted him
in the ribs.
In moment l had pulled them
apart and Murf exclaimed, When
the gentleman informed me, sub, that
he used to be brckah in Wall street,
l fo'got for the moment that he is of
his dip sur, and | plugged him one
for yo' Uncle Owens sake, sub, &C
cording to certain promises made to
myself, sub! III be glad to see yo' all
at ouah training quatahs tomorrow
subj" and with this Murf politely
DOTTED his hat to the alarmed ladies
and strobe off majestically down the
road.
81 beg pardon, Uncle Peter"
said, but on the level, forgot to tel
you not to mention Wall street tc
poor old Murf."
"Confound you and poor ole
Murf!" spluttered my surprised ant
bewildered relative, feeling the dis
turbed portions of his anatomy care
fully for breakages. The man is {
lunatic Harmless indeed! It's my
belief he ought to be in an asylum
OH my chest! my chest! l believe
it's crushed I'M"
Aunt Martha, in tears, ran hithe
and back in wild alarm, ooh
Peter" she cried; you must put OF
mustard plaster at once. Tacks
dear, run and get the mustard! Com,
in the house, Peter, and lie down
Oh, John, don't let that horrid mai
come here again" and with this the,
all rushed in to spring the first aid Il
the injured gag on Uncle Peter.
IL