davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
EVENING CHAT
BY RUTH CAMERON

well, I'd just like to know what
Evelyn Berkeley has to be so stuck-up
and exclusive about"
rs she stuck up?"
well, I should say The other day
she sat down beside me in the train by
mistake, and when she looked up saw
me, and had to speak. she looked as glum
as an oyster. And she hardly said
word all the way She just makes me
sick! What if her grandfather did write
a few books That's no reason for her
to set herself up above everybody. And
little"
heard that conversation about week
ago.
Yesterday, strangely enough I heard
another conversation between the much
censured Evelyn and a girl friend.
Said the girl friend Evelyn Berkeley.
why didn't you talk more at the reception
the other night2 / watched you and you
hardly said word the whole evening.
Do you think that's a nice way to act
when you promised me you'd try to talk
more?
Said Evelyn. oh dear. knew YOU
would be disguised with me. Janice. and
| did try, but you don't know how diff
ficult it is for me to make small talk
with people don't know very We'll I'm
always meeting people that L know
slightly on the train going back and forth
to work, and 1 feel L ought to talk to
them. yet 1 can't think of thing to say.
hate myself You have a natural social
gift Janice, and you don't know how
hard it is to be born shy and self con-
scious."
1 wonder what the parties of the first
conversation would have said IL they
could have heard the second 1 have
quoted the two at such length. because It
seems to that they expose with
singular clearness one of the most COM
low creatures of which We are guilty
namely, the misinterpretation of diff
dence and shyness as pride and ex-
clusiVeneSS.
Many a girl-and a man too. for that
matter-who suffers torture in her ef-
forts to overcome her Unborn diffidence,
is further punished for her misfortune
by dislike and avoidance on the part Of
those who misinterpret her shyness and
self consciousness as snobbishness and
diSagreeable pride.
Now. 1 think almost everyone has diff
dent moods-moods when he suddenly
finds himself out of tune with the uni
converse with those he ordinarily treas
ures and enjoys
Surely you have had this experience.
You knew people were thinking you diff
dent and disagreeable. You wanted to
get back to your natural self and yet you
were helpless. There you were marooned
on a cold little island of self. ignorant
how you came there totally incapable of
getting off even of signaling your I'M
happy state to the mainland
BY and by the Overtired condition. the
preoccupatfOn or the anxiety that cast
you on that island was relieved and you
found yourself once more on the pleasant
mainland of happy. human intercourse.
Surely. then. you paused and thought |
a moment of the unfortunate people with |
whom the condition of shyness. diffidence |
and lack of harmony with the universe |
was the rule, and anything else the ex- |
ceptfon
IF you didn't you will next time, won't |
you?
And thus turn your painful experience
to good. by letting it teach you not to |
shyness and dinidence as |
arrogance or unamiability
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
BeMare. SIG. Caruso.

Me q cake of soap. What does
he know about soap
This was the exclamation of Emma
Trentini, prima donna, as she stood in
her apartment and stamped her tiny
foot and shook her curls by way of
emphasis, while giving to a reporter
her opinion of Enrico CaruSo, to whom
she was engaged at least, she says
she thought she was-until his arrival
in New York Wednesday.
According to dispatches Caruso was
not pleased with his engagement to
Trentini. and said, she reminds me of
a peanut. She is only cake of soapi
"CarusO never used much soap the
prima donna said w hen We sang to-
gether in opera he made love to me-
He hold me in his arms and he sing.
When I sing he whisper so none but l
could hear-he whisper his love. His
voice make me forget his greasy APP
pearance and his lack of soap with
plenty of hot water.
con stage and off he tell me many
times he love me and n want me to
be mother to his two boys When my
mind was full of his divine voice 1 con-
sent Now he say I'm a peanut and
only 4 cake of soap!
WAS ever man so tickle like Caru-
so? He swear he love only me- Every
time l see him he tell me his love. but
when am away he say I'm a peanut
and a cake of soap Take care, CarusO,
You lose your voice and you may sell
peanuts on street corner and use soap
much soap
ssCaruso- Caruso-I-I forget him. I
forget his voice. ] forget his boys. ]
forget his stage kisses-I forget him
and everything except he is pighead,
fat, conceited, tickle, and Eighty. I'm
glad l found him out in time. Grand
voice-diVine voice. but he'd make an
awful husband. '=Chicago dispatch to
the New York American
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
ADVER Using TALKS
BY WILLIAM C. FRIEDMAN

Among your personal acquaintance it
is easy for you to pick out the men and
women whom you can instinctively trust
those who stick to thing until it is
easily-those who promise and keep their
word and those who do not
There is no trouble to pick out those
who are successful, nor is it difficult TO
of success and who lack the qualities
necessary to accomplish results.
Your personal acquaintance are no diff
ferent from the average business man
they have the same strength and the
same weakness.
The only way You have of judging the
favorable and unfavorable characteristics
OF the business houses in your commun-
1ty is by reading and responding to their
advertisements.
One can easily tell by the reading of
advertisements whether or not there IS
sincerity and a progressive. enthusiastic,
determined spirit back of the business.
One can also tell by the regularity
irregularity of the appearance of the ad-
vertisements. whether or not there is per-
sistency and concentration and confidence
back of the business
Then when you visit the stores you can
decide whether or not the merchandise,
the attention you receive. and the service
you get justify or confirm the printed
statements you have read.
There is more application of the per-
sonal analysis in these days than mer-
chants think, so 1t behooves all who want
the confidence of the public to advertise
so that their personality. their integrity,
the character of their merchandise, and
the accuracy of their statements are i'm
pressed on the people
Merchants who advertise in this way,
and who back up their announcements
will attain real and lasting success.
(To be continued.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
AYHAWKER .JOTS

It's the idea of the Marysville Advo-
| cate-Democrat that the one universal
passion is loVe-of money.
An Atchison woman is so precise, re-
ports the Globe, she never prepares
cottage pudding because she lives in a
bungalow
1T is better to coax than to try to
drive" quotes the Pratt Union ana
then it asks: But how would that work
with a railroad spike?
Senator Vests eulogy on the dog has
started its semi annual rounds of the
Kansas weeklies, with the Lacrosse
Chieftain leading the procession.
If Uncle Rastus, of the Clay Center
Dispatch had his way he would impose
fine of SO on every man who fails
to vote unless he has a good excuse
The Sterling Bulletin has noticed
that most men are more particular
about "blanketing" their automobiles
in cold weather than they are their
horses.
The Osakatomie Graphic wonders if
the man nowadays VINO calls himself a
Lincoln Republican or a Jefferson
Democrat, knows just what he IS talk
ing about
Answering an inquiry, the Atchison
Weekly Globe says: The only way to
keep a BOY looking neat is to haudeuff
him, shackle his feet and give him
sleeping powders every five minutes
1t seems mean to the Holton Signal
to pick out the faithful old rooster ana
feed him up on the best there is and
pamper him until he has learned to
have the utmost confidence in you and
then chop his head off and serve him
to the kinfclk on Thanksgiving.
The Clay Center Times calls atten-
ton to the fact that there is a law in
Kansas which makes it unlawful to
introduce or sell within the state any
seed or roots of Johnson grass. And
then the Times pertinently inquiries;
Who knows what johnson grass is?
We note in an exchange a headline
that SAYS: The World is Growing Bet
ter It is hard for a newspaper man
to believe that when he receives a copy
of his paper returned to him marked
'Refused'' from a subscriber who is in
arrears two dollars and six bits.-Con-
cOrdia NKansan.
A word of appreciation from Dow
Busenbark the editor of the Lyndon
Peoples Herald: our thanks are here
by extended to Clyde Hanger for a
gallon of ripe persimmons presented to
the head push and office force on Mon
day They were thoroughly ripe and
made good eatin' for an emaeiated and
ill-fed cadaver such as the writer Pre-
sunnably if Editor Busenbark were pre-
scented with a basket of pawpaws he
would drop dead with joy
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.
IFrom the Philadelphia Record

GFrom the Philadelphia Record.l
Even the thirst for glory may have its
direful after-effects.
Is it possible for man to be straight
and make both ends meet?
Some people are so wrapped up In
themselves as to suggest human balls of
Irvine.
Jack Frost is an old busybody He
even stations his icicles around as eavs-
choppers.
1t is quite possible for man to break
his word without going around dropping
remarks.
Reading maketb fun man" quoted
the Wise Guy 80 does the wine when
it's red added the Simple Mug.
Are you interested in psychology.
asked the Boston girl. Isl Cologyz''
who's he?" asked the girl from Chicago.
Sillicus-"Is there any cure for love-
Cynicus-"Yes. the gold cure In other
words an injection of alimoney."
Hoax-"I wonder what has become of
all the dime musemum freaks" Joax-
Il understand most of the india rubber
men are now employed in saloons as
bouncers."
Blobbs-"Guzzler is always complaining
about his ups and downs" Slobbs-
well, his ups and downs usually consist
of gravitating between rathskellars and
roof gardens.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
GLOBE SIGHTS
BY THE ATCHISON GLOBE

This has been bad year for potatoes
and potenta tes-
Nobody ever gets very far with an at
tempt to initiate genius.
Hoping for the best however. is less
important than working for it.
Everything in China seems to be known
by some short and ugly word.
Speaking of rules which work both
ways: Many men break automobiles
An Investigating committee takes
enough time TO learn more than it does
Friends aren't worth much to a man
who wants them for what they are worth
If you think people are anxious to hear
you talk, rent a hall and charge admis-
sion.
TO call some one conversationalist is
a polite way of saying he is a big tall1er-
Hatred is a painful passion, but there
are people who are rather proud of it
Aren't there many things you think you
will Put a Stop to, but which keep going
on?
Some people not only marry in haste;
they repeat that performance at frequent
intervals.
A man needn't be so proud of not Weld
ing to temptation when there isn't any i'll
his vicinity
Remember that the industrious slot
machine never loses any money for the
man who employs it.
If you can't deliver the goods, don't de-
liver an excuse in their place and expect
it to be satisfactory.
A Practical Joker may have a slight
sense of humor, but he lacks the well
known horse variety
It is difficult for an expert to under
stand that other people may not know
what he is talking about.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29

said Nan seriously. Tell yours, and
then it's good-by."
He leaned toward her.
Il wished that 1 might never lose
track of you, Nam
II am going uptown on the ele-
waited"
what did you wish?'' he persisted
you have to tell; on the level, you
do; when you agreed"
IT wished that-that you were going
uptown on the same elevated"
Harvey bent down and carefully col
lected the fragments of the wishbone,
and slipped them in his vest pocket
THAT is a magic wishbone," he said
ct am not superstitious, Nan Farms
lee, from Tennessee, but I think luck
is perching on my left shoulder blade
at this minute, and I carry his wish
bone here. He has properly introduce
ed US. and I defy you to get rid of me.
Ready, fair lady?''
Out they passed into the swirling
snowstol m, Thanksgiving waits. But
all the glamour of young love was in
his eyes as he looked down at her, and
Nan was happy.-( Copyright, 1911, by
Associated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
who viii Use the Canal?

For the first time in five years an
American clipper ship has arrived in
Boston harbOr where their maStS were
once as the stand of pines on a Maine
hillside. Business on Atlantic avenue
pauses whilst the populace gapes at
her Old men lead their grandchildren
to pierheads, saying: Now look,
SONNY We can say you've seen Yam
kee ship like what your grandad sailed
in" as babes were lifted to look on
Lincoln. Poor old vessel first to be
the museum freak of her home port,
and then. has report has it, to go up
and down this coast, dismantled and
disgraced, at the end of a towline, I'M
til she finds a grave on Peaked Hill
bar
Aye. we'll, one or two memoranda fer
the people of New England and faint
halloo to those beyond the Allie
First-When the Panama canal is
article in the London Times Of this
month reminds the British that there
are not a dozen American vessels en-
gagged in cross-sea service.
The want of ships has prevented the
United States from developing any
considerable trade with her neighbor
in South America. With
larger feet available for the new con-
ditions which will follow the opening
of the Panama canal we should take
care Jndl OLlleA AAe1ttoA47 ACSS ldNOIdDiN
situated should not enter this field
through any lack Of enterprise on our
part"
second-When the navy was sent
spinning around the globe in Mr.
Roosevelt's time. was it generally
known that it was coaled by foreign
bottoms and that the governments of
Europe We're laughing in their sleeves
at the spectacle!
Third=Does the country suppose
that in the event of sudden war. such
seamen as won their battles in 1912
and 1861 could be trained in six
weeks? The old breed of seafaring
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
A MEMORY

l sit alone, in my room tonight.
AND think of her dear, sweet face
mere where 1 miss the tender light
or her loneliness and grace
1 read her letters over again
The letters she wrote last wear.
The faded flowers in the folds remain
As her dear hand placed them there.
An little she thought, when these flowers
she pressed
For the heart that adored her so,
1hey soon be here, above her breast,
And she, in the dark below!
But the beat of her holy heart was stilled
Ere the voice in its depths could speak.
ana the Angel of Death in his anger
chilled,
The Rose of Life on her cheek.
why should I read her letters DER?
Can they bring her back, as of old
Inc hand that penned them can write
more
The lips that kissed them are cold.
Dear! we shall meet when this life is
past
Under the dawn and dew,
AND Lie will break my life at last,
w hen 1 dream in the dark with you.
Frank l. Stanton, in the Atlanta Con-
stitution.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
Karger,s Fingers Were Crossed.

Charles D. Hilles. secretary to the
president, tells this on Gus J. Karger,
the washington newspaper man, who
is probably closer to President Taft
than any other man of his profession
in town Karger is a Hebrew, and a
wit so HiIles is safe in circulating this
SANDER.
1t appears that when the presiden-
tial party visited the home town of
Major Archie Butt, the presidents
aide, they attended church where
Butt, as a youth, was a worshiper
The president and Karger sat in a
pew near the front, and when the
stirring hymn, Onward, Christian
Soldiersi' was given out. the presi-
dent, as usual, lifted up his voice in
song. The boys looked at Karger,
and to their establishment noted that
he was caroling away cheerfully
alongside the president
But 1 looked over" says HiIles
'and saw that Karger had his hands
on the top of the pew in front of
him. with his fingers crossed. ''-Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

GF'rom the Chicago News.
There's many slip twixt his and her
lip
Nearly every man thinks he is an in
spiration to some woman.
We at least expect a topper to have
sober second thoughts.
Wise are they who think twice before
getting married once
It's almost as easy to give good advice
as it is not to follow it.
Judging from the obituaries most of the
really good people must be dead.
Some daughters wonder what excuse
mother had for bringing father into the
The young men all sit up and take
notice every time a girl makes noise
like an heiress-
Ard many a man has built a castle N
the air while his wife was mailing a board
on the back fence
A handsome woman may look good to a
man. but it takes a truly good woman to
get a strange hold on his heart.
It's a sign that a woman is happily
married if she feels sorry for the colIn-
try because her husband isn't president
of it.
another girl she hates-perhaps because
of the opportunity TO muss up the be-
loved enemy's complexion
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
INC Duck was Armored.

The Rev. G. A. Vets. pastor of the
Methodist Episcopal church of Bay
port, Long Island, went to the shore
a few days ago to shoot ducks He
found one duck right on the job, and
its calmness indicated that it was in
nocent of the projected assault upon
it.
The clergyman hid behind a bush,
took aim, and fired. The duck ducked
but came up again apparently unhurt.
Mr.. Niets blazed away again. but the
duck gave no heed. The minister was
losing his temper, but he persevered.
He had fred his 18th shot when he
learned that the duck was a decoy.
well. welll" the minister did not
say with a smile.-New York World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
HUAOR or THE DIP

Wiggins-Maud says she is p but
happen to know that she was born In
know that the date on which "a woman
was born has nothing whatever 10 do with
her age afterwards.-Boston Transcript.
My friend the architect. has a hard
job on his hands" What's that2" "Ic
has a rich customer who wants him 70
build an Italian vendetta around her new
cottage baltimore American.
You say you are your wife's third hus-
band2' said one man to another. during
a talk. NO. l am her fourth husband"
was the reply. Heavens. man.. said the
you're a habit-"-Tit-Bits.
when visit the Grand Canon OF IN.
Yellowstone ! realize the insignificanct
of man. Ever been there2'' Never y,,r
can get the same sensation by going TO a
suffragette meeting" Courier
Journal
Not His Funeral.-wife-To be fr.rt-
with you, II you were to die / should or
t8iniy marry again. Husbaud-Ts,-e -, -
lection-Irn not going to worry about he
know--Variety Life.
so you were successful In your effor,.
eft OT ya o gg1yr 900 Sp 6els VIII in which he
easily And how much did YOU finsII,.
ger: - After paying the lawyers / ta,35
" F4 -N4O4e free Press.
" nat dld you do when YOU me, a..
u ain ROPER race TO face2'' 81 e~r,fs..liee
that had been interviewed bv ne . si,iiea
s se, me luggage carriers the din SiSet
ana bor-oi,sed ana me sleeping car porters
lngton Star. IN iiiA- wash
Did the Gildevs have ~,..-,
arranging their separation ~ 'ronole in
-TSes.' no., ~. until they reached the ch,,AAt
. .r5Ss nave put one child Won mid.
~. ~" ABOUT the dogs2' That h"oW-
! hey had two dogs" II see ~ "a easy.
je,-e i1,es 90 Why. Giidey s,,ad lat
took the child a5S x, Or generosity AZ
'oes' Cleveland Plain Dealsr. nave o0th
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
REFLECTIONS or \ BACHELOR.

[F7rom the New YORK Press
Love anticipates and its fulfillment ret
respects.
man will never lie to his wife il he
hasn't one.
Reform begins as far away from home
as possible.
Wealth that brags is never so big as
the brag says it is
The reason boy can go to college and
not learn anything is his father learned
less not going
man gets to know so much by keep
ing his mouth shut that when he opens
it he no longer knows it.
All the money spent raising children
would help them much more L so much
wasn't spent on them
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
Ply THE WAY
az HARvEY PARsoNs.

| smashed Cup race was pulled off at
savannah and no one was killed.
!
The mongoose in the Kansas City
zoo is to be deported because he is
/ dangerous animal" OF course he
| should be deported; should this mon
goose escape from his cage he would,
key crop of the Nation. Why not make
a Campaign Issue of him? Think of the
| hit a politician could make in the rural
districts by quoting the Washington
official who says that the mongoose
might do great damage to the Ameri-
can horticultural interests.
The X. c. mongoose is the only speci-
men IN the United States, and is about
the size of a musk rat. business OF
viewing with alarm.)
Hon Alb 9amet's jewels are being sold
at auction However, none of the pearls
of his late harem have been offered
for sale, the prevailing opinion being
that they wouldn't bring 80 cents
dozen net
The mail carrier who thinks he is
carrying heavy burden should con-
graduate himself that he doesn't be-
long to the middle ages, when mail
carrier carried an assortment of stove
doors, sewer pipe and soup kettles.
Man reaps what he sows and woman
sews what she rips.
Current advertisement offers baby
muffiers" at figure within the reach OF
all. This is an invention worthy of
consid Grafton We have always held
that most babies were too loud
Senator Bristow attacks Wicker
sham's policy. Attacking something,
as you may have observed, iss one of
H., ,1e+r r, i1,cr
Question for debate before the Bar
Der Shop Forum is: Where do we
draw the line between a snap and a
spell? We hold that a cold snap
should be confined to less than
hours duration, and that after that
it IS a "cold SPELL
"Yew may hev a full set of Lamb
an Bacon in thuh libr'y, but it won t
do heck-uv-a-lot twards cuttin'
down expenses in thuh kitchen. -
Deacon Squash.
Another reasonable definition of a |
Philosophers A poor man who is try /
ing to put across the bluff that he
doesn't want to be rich.
The principal trouble with many
would-be musicians is that they work |
the instrument, rather than play it.
The boob whose veins are full of |
skim milk is always the first to re-
member that discretion is the better
part of valor.
And an artistic temperament"
seems to be a mental disorder that
causes one to prefer lot of soft soap
to q steady salary.
Notice to friends: You might as
well send in your orders for the Dodd
CASTOR book. The report that the
illustrator will take his pay in books
and distribute them Christmas
presents, is Greatly Exaggerated.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29

men is dying out of the country, and
there is now no way to replace them.
The money we lose through the want
of a merchant marine this nation can
better afford to miss than the kind OF
men we lose.
These are the baldest elementary
facts of the situation. They are ad-
mitted in congress to be ignored. Let
any legislature be proposed of sort
which will fairly allow American ship
building firms and American vessels
to compete in the markets of the world
and bark to the owls boot and parrot
decentralization Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-11-29
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Nor is every long-haired individual
a genius.
Too many smiles and too much laugh
ter are of the forced variety
X X
Why is it that nine people out Of
ten will push on a door that is marked
'pulI?"
No mans memory is so poor that he
doesn't remember lots of things he'd
like to forget.
X =
You seldom have to attempt TO make
a horse drink when you lead it to wa
ter It's generally thirsty enough to
drink OF its own accord.