davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-02-02
Cannon IN DOUBT
Doesn't Know What CONGRESS
Will Do With Reciprocity.
BE CAUTIOUS, HE ADVISES
Speaks at Banquet of Wooden Manu-
facturers' Association.
LODGE FAVORS COMMISSION
Massachusetts Senator Wants Tariff
Out Of Politics-President Wood
Seeks Fair Deal.
LODGE FAv0Rs COMMISSION

With practically every republican
member of the finance committee of
the Senate and the ways and means
committee of the House listening, Speaker
Cannon last night earnestly advised cau-
ton in consideration of President Tafts
reciprocity treaty with Canada, at tue
banquet OF the National Association of
Wool Manufacturers in the New Willard
Hotel.
In a months time we will be called
upon to enact the reciprocity agreement
with Canada into a law; but l don't
know what we are going to do with it.
We will only have TO come to COM
promise that cares for the industries of
all our people, he said.
Mr.. Cannon was in a fighting mood,
not an apologe;ic one Mixing satire
with careful advice, he pounded the Ia
bic i'm front of him to emphasize ono
point and the next minute dropped ms
voice a, most TO whisper
Several speeches had been made con-
corning schedule X, the famous wooden
schedule of the present tariff act, and
when Speaker Cannon arose shortly AFTER
midnight there was an animation III MS
countenance that commanded hushci
silence from the hundreds of guests pres
ent.
Experience Of Forty Years.
Il am not a schedule sharp. said
Speaker Cannon. Il wouldn't know a
schedule if | saw it on the street: but
have been in Congress forty years get
ting experience about revenue legislation.
l have followed it from the committee
assignments through all it's processes
and if anybody thinks a person can mo-
| nopolize the whole thing. he is sadly mis-
| taken.
| The Speaker reviewed the various tariff
acts with which he has dealt in Con-
| gress When he came to the Payne-Ald-
rich law, he said
Il followed PAYNE in that law. | fol-
| lowed the committee of the House and /
| followed it when compromise was eff
| fected. 1t was not a perfect bill. But
| followed President Taft, too. and believe
with him that it was by far the best reve-
nue. law made in the history OF the Ameri-
can people.
| IF there is a weakness among the
! friends of protection and in the protective
| policy, IT is that we are trimming our
sails to satisfy the dissatisfied and il
| you satisfy them today, You will find
| them doubly dissatisfied tomorrow. They
| will only learn through their stomachs
! what they cannot learn through their
heads. The people have given the demo-
| Gratis a majority of siXty-seven in the
next House. and they have made great
| gains in the Senate. God knows, / don't,
| when Champ Clark sends a bill to the
| Senate. what the Senate is going to do
| with it.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-02-02
Mqyye>x&roy&@''
037.030 F Street. No Branch Stores
Final Reductions.

Following the Inventory offering the entire re-
wanted lots prices that make them
precedentcd bargains
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
Retail Prices at
Public Markets



Pot roast. 10 to " cents pound rolled
ruaat, rs 10 10 cents pound prime Iip
roast. is cents pound; fancy light veal
fs 10 20 cents pound, legs - ihmh 2
ana a cents pound. legs mutton. II 20
fs cents pound; leg pork. ~ cents pound
German head cheese. IS cents pound Ger
man blood tongue, IS cents pounds hons
bologna. 10 cents pound. ? pounds
Isl cents. Eastern ham, II cents pound
cottage ham. 20 cents pound salt pork.
ib cents pound.
Local ranch eggs, 20 cents DOZEN
washington creamery butter, 20 cents
pound. Minnesota and Iowa butter, %
cent? pound. . pounds 81 Danish method.
butter. 80 cents pound. z pounds 90
cents: renovated butter. 30 cents pound
Wisconsin, cream brick choose. 20 cents
pound. ilmburgsr cheese, - cents pound
imported swlas cheese. 30 cents pound
domeafic Swiss cheese. % cents pound
fuli cream cheese. 20 cents pound ore
gon cheese. 2 pounds 90 cents
Head lettuce. 8 70 ~ cents head eel
cry. 2 stalks fb ccntEi BruaselA sprouts,
f0 cents pound; caullflower 10 end ~
cents head. sweet potatoes, 2 POUNDS 10
cents; cabbage. ~ cents pound cram
berries. 10 cents liquid measuroi estlnF
appiea. 10 cents dozen. oranges, 10 20
al cents dozen. lemons, 10 cents dozen,
Florida grape fruit. 6 cents; Jonathan
apples, 10 cents dozen. spanish grapes
20 cents pound; bananas, !. 10 ana -
cntn doben. w%ainuts. IS cents pound
yakima honey, 10 cents comb.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

n,y United Press,

LOS ANGELES. Jan. 20-Return-
ing from Pasadena at 3 a. m today.
Lewis NJ. Woolwine. son OF w ID.
Woolwlne. vice president Of the Ma
tlonal Bank OF California. was In
stantly killed when his automobile
struck n vegetable wagon near
Bardntown.
Miss Rosaline Harrington. 20. and
Mrs. j. NJ Grummond were severely
injured.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

AGENT CAUGHT

SAN FRANCISCO, Jan. 20-Bo.
cause he IL alleged TO have advor.
tiHod TO procure wealthy husbands
for lonesome women. accepted pay.
ment and then failed 10 make good.
Hugo NJ Morris. said 20 be a cap.
itallat. lA under arrest today. An
alleged Chicago accomplish recently
pleaded guilty 60 a charge of using
the mails 10 defraud. Membership
In the matrimonial club was 81 for
men and 81 for women. success
guaranteed" federal officers say.
Three Iowa swalnB Hworo TO the
complaints against Morris.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
leY star Specially

OLYMPIA. Jan. e0-rhe house
n representatives saw an unusual
think Wednesday when members
of the legislature sat In tho gal
isrics. while 10 the seats OF the
house itsch sat the members of the
state Federation OF Labor
Aud an orator addressed the
meeting,
Il wasn't n member Of the legis-
lature nor a polished graduate OF
the schools. Il Vas Peter Henratty,
n coal miner Of Gle Elum
A working man himself. Hen.
ratty told tho representatives about
the burdens which working men On
duro, OF their suffering. their hard.
ships. their toll and Of the great
benefits they give 10 humanity.
Then he pleaded for Justice.
ne wanted the crippled among
the working men TO be pro
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
WANT GOOD ROADS


PORTLAND. Or. Jan. s0.-Let.
tcrH from farmers. grocerymen. mail
carriers, commercial associations
and other organizations throughout
the state will deluge the Oregon
legislature with letters urging the
adoption OF tho Oregon Good Roads
Associations five highway bills. &c.
cording To President John Haak. OF
the association, today.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
MONTE CARLO
WANTS CHANGE
IN, United Press,

PARIS. Jan. 20-Prince Albert'e
plan for a constitutional govern
ment Of the princIpality Of Monaco,
In which Monte Carlo ia situated,
presented 10 the French consultative
council engaged In trying 10 regu-
late the affairs OF the little country,
was today rejected as unfit.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
LABOR SPEAKER
THRILLS SOLONS

provided for he told o. the de.
lays IN court. OF the technical
inIuuttcee, of the Ambulance
ehssers" who prey upon Injured
men, 81 the numerous motions,
demurrers, wrlta Of error and
devious other methods 20 hinder
the just compensation fer In.
Iured ssorkmen. and he pleaded
for the compensation act, which
would fix the relief without the
necessity OF going TO court.
IL was a masterful speech. be
'ause spoken with evident aincer
". And when Henratty goI
through. Legislators and laborlng
men alike crowded around to ahak,
ala hands.
Clarence Parker, n Tacoma ma
Walter j. Thompson. preal
of the State Humane society
Ind Senator Faulkner also spoke II
,ehalf OF the bin.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
ours FLORAL SHIP.

SANTA BARBARA. Cal. Jan. 20.
a b~attioahip made OF carnations
VIII be presented 10 Rear Admiral
Chauncey Thomas this afternoon by
the local lodge Of Native Daughters
as a compliment for having the
cruiser California designated an the
flagship OF the Pacific fleet.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
Release Suspect

BELiINGHAM. Jan. 2o-winiam
Davidson. arrested In Seattle on
suspicion OF being the murderer
OF Gaihralth az Acme last week. has
been released. Il having been de
cid"d that no IL not the guilty
man
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
GOOD NIGHT.

BARTLEsvILLE. okla. Jan. 20.
Two boys. Elmer and Edward
Miilus. were playing with a piece
OF solidincd nitroglycerin they
found near an oil well. One OF
them struck II with a hammer and
both were blown TO atoms.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
Ar wEsrLAKE MARKET.

Winesap apples. IS cents per box, de-
.uvored. fancy baldwin,. si2b per box
white winter permain, flbO per box
Home beauty. gt.i0 per box fancy spit
zsBburg. $40 per boz
strictly fresh ranch eggs. 20 cents per
dozon. cooking eggs, 70 csnthi Minnesota
reamary butter. 3 pounds for fl.00i
choice Jersey cream butter 2 pounds TOT
rs cents.
sliced ham. 30 cents per pounds sliced
driod beef, 90 cents per poundi coteborE
saueage. ss cents per pound. picked pigs
feet. 10 cents per pound; cottage cheese,
~ cents per pound. 2 pounds for 20
| oenta. z big herring for 10 cents
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
RANCH LIFE FOR
STRIKERS PLANNED

SAN RAFAEL. Cal. Jan. 20,-A
committee 60 be appointed AZ the
session OF the State Building Trades
Council here late today Will be In
trusted with the purchase OF a blk
ranch TO be used as a base OF supply
In times OF Industrial warfare. ac-
cordlng 10 Secretary Tyietmoe OF
the council.
Thirty 10 nfty thousand acres will
be purchased and strikers or. men
out OF employment will be cared for
on the ranch.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
INDIAN SHAKERS


OLYMPIA. Jan. 20.-The Shaker
church has been Incorporated The
bishop and head OF the church Is
Mud Bay Sam. an indian. Twelve
Indians are apostles. Sobriety and
morality are the principles. The
church has a large membership
among the Indians % the section.
It's announced purpose II to elevate
the Indian race Of this and other
states" Mud hay Sam and the
apostles yisit reservations and con.
vert redskins In bunehea Of 80 10
100.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
MOVING PICTURES LURE
YOUNG GIRLS TO SLAVERY

PHILADELPHIA. Jan 20-Four
yoang girls. alleged white slaves.
were held In bail today. They had
been lured from their homes by
promises Of positions as actresses
"a moving picture shows They gave
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
GIRLS MusI WORSHIP.

WELLESLEY. Mass. Jan. 20
Young men who call on the girl
students AZ Wellesley Sunday nights
must attend divine worship In Mem.
orlai chapel under a new rule Just
put into effect by the faculty. The
young nien must sit through the
service.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
MINISTER K Joa.

Rev Thomas J. shuey. pastor Of
the University Place Christian
church. is now secrciary-trcasurer
OF the Shaw.Priest Lyeeum bureau.
succeeding Clark A Shaw. who re.
tired January 4.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

their names as Katie R0senburg. rs.
Barbara Wahl. Is. Louisa Fischer.
IS. and Alice McCarrcn. Is
John Mcclure was held in $4,000
bail on the charge Of enticing tho
girls from their homes.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
Asylum Scandal


SALEM. Or, Jan. 20.--it In prob
that a demand will be made
for an Investigation OF the admin
iatration OF DIR. Steiner. auperin.
tendeut OF the Oregon state insane
asylum. ms n result of the outburat
In the senate yesterday afternoon.
when Senator Bowerman attacked
the present asylum regime and
charged extravaganza obtained
steiner took control.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
ENDORSE

The brotherhood OF the First
Methodist Episcopal church last
night formally endorsed Council.
Blaine and Wardall and voted
unanimously To support the recall
candidate for mayor. Tho brother.
hood comprises $50 members.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
20 AAuE

Ballard people who have had TO
pay a Scent fare on both the Sc
attic Electric street cars and the
Everett interurban In order TO reach
the city will. after February /. be
granted the use Of n transfer.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

PEORIA. III. Jan. 20 On Friday.
the 18th. assigned berth is. on train
n. the eaptbouud passenger train
Mrs ". Greenwood Of New York
left hers for her home. hoping
To dlapcl the hoodnn which has en-
velopod the number IL for many
gaara
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

COLUMBUS, Mo-, Jan 70
chickens with short toenaila are
the best egg layers" said Prof j E.
Rice, poultry expert for Cornell uni.
versity. addressing the students Of
the agricultural college Of the Uni.
yernity OF Missouri. here today.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

SAN FRANCISCO. Jan a0-The
pride % Wong sins Yum. Chinese
merchant. n worth $780, 900. and bis
business aeumen nets him t4ieT
per hour. according TO a suit
brought against immigration In
apcctors Strand and Robinson.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
RgpoRTs RICH STRIKE.

Paul Dcnhari. a large and veal.
thy operator In the Nome district.
reports a rich strike on spaulding
creek in the lnnoke district The
extent and value OF the strike 10 not
fully known.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
PAID AT LAST.

CHARLTON. o.. Jan. 20@oriando
H. Chamberlain has Just received a
check for $3.50 from the United
states government In compensation
for clothes lost IN the Civil war
Chamberlain enlisted I'm the New
York infantry In June 1851.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
THE MARKETS

Ute f~sftowlu3 are me average rsfre-
StAssd b the tgsai whelessisr< 90 iersl
pfnsiucw. meat- and frsa brtres ~ All
r4se@ are subject 20 variation according
10 freshness aud aen~rsi rtFsfirnfe. hnf
these prices. unless athesrtse Indicated.
are Ter strictly nrst rradrs.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
p. NJ. SAVES $500.

To prevent the practice Of un-
necessarily calling for mail AZ the
general delivery windows. Post
master George y. Russell has'closcd
two windows. which will 10 a
saving OF 1900.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
Flood Waters Fall

MMfNNvILLE. Or, Jan. 90
II Is believed that the crest OF the
flood In the Yamhiil river has pass.
ed. The river gauge registered a.
feet shortly after midnight aud this
morning the waters are falling.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
socIAIIsrs

Socialists OF Seattle will meet In
q few days TO protest against the
punishment Of DIR. kotoku and 20
other japanese socialists now held
an anarchists In Japan.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
PIONEER IS DEAD.

OAKLAND. Cal. Jan. 20.-walter
Scott Williams. IS. once commits.
sloner IN San Francisco for British
Columbia and several OF tho East
'ern Canadian provinces. is dead
here today.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
or. YOU ooop luck.

KANSAS CITY. Mo. Jan. Pol.
Mason got out Of n job. and spent
his last quarter. Next morning a
letter Was awaiting him telling that
he was heir 20 the estate OF his
grandfather. George Hopkins. val
ued at $500. 900.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20
This Store Will Open al $3.50
Tomorrow and Close at 6 p. I'M.

Let us repeat-we want TO be sure that the word
reaches all whom we scrve-That this store is to be
open daily from $50 in the morning to 8 in the
evening, including Saturdays. That means that
you who wish to come down town early tomorrow
or upon any Saturday in the future, may ommenc
your shopping at h~alf-past 8. Remember, please,
that ne shall. close, from now on, at 8 in the evening.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1911-01-20

Truif-s.ifing Price.
Wrnatrhee apples ....n* l.se9 81
Native apples sssss.ssfs s*s WV A'Ns
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
Tommy Wac Locical.

Uncle Bob came home the night 81.
fore Christmas with a toy acrobat thar
would turn over ana over on the tioos
after It had been wound Up. Tommy
was deeply interested ID the trinket.
and he expressed unbounded admira.
ton for it He did not ask for it ont
right, but be went So far as to JAW,
what are you going to do with ii
Uncle BobY"
The next morning Tommy was as
lighted to 1nd toy acrobat ID his
stocking. He wound 1t, ana il was
soon tumbling about on the door, while
Tommy watched ii with great joy.
1T Is just like the one Uncle Bot
had, said bis sister.
Yes" replied Tommy. "and / think
1t Ii the same one. Now. ii Uncle Boz
has bis this morning then this one was
given to me By Santa Claus. III Tn.
Gle Bob hasn't got his then he gave
it to me and there Is no Santa Claus
am going to find out whether you
folks have been flbbing to me Oh not.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
MAKES DAINTY B0NBON BOX
Simple Materials, With q little IN
genulty, Can Be Turned Into
Acceptable Present

The foundation Of very dainty
bonbon box is nothing more than q
small tin cracker box.
The entire outside surface has been
covered with an odd piece Of brocad-
ed satin glued on perfectly smooth,
tapping well over on the inside. The
lid IS treated In the same way and has
4 trellis Of narrow pale-green satin
ribbon worked over the top and tied
III smart bow at one side. The
box is lined with heavy glazed paper,
pasted on right up to the edge and
covering the satin that was turned In
from the outside
Such 4 box lined with silk or velvet
would serve as a jewel case, a hand
keEehief bog Of q receptacle for any
trfnkets II lined with silk, pad the
bottom gith layer Or two Of cotton
batting perfumed with delicate
sachet
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
TO MAKE I'M ODD MOMENTS
Trimmings That Are So Highly Popu-
lar Just at Present Need Not BE
Matter Of Expense.

The girl Of slender purse who Is at
tracted By the graceful imported
garnitures Of beaded fringe shown
Oh some or the most attractive gowns
OF the present season need not feel
it obligatory on her either to be
extravagant or to 90 without the
touch that would make her new
frock
Beads lib themselves are not relative
" expensive, and with well chosen
assortment Of these and few long
needlefuls Of silk, either to match or
contrast with that Of the ground work,
q plain silken fringe may be trans
formed into one that need be no iraita-
ton Of any shown on the latest Inn
portations, but may, rather, have the
lar more desirable quality OF original
heauty intsts leYisAug.
The best method of attaeilsng these
somewhat fragile and elusive bangles"
ID to knot the threading silk firmly,
first iii the beading Of the fringe, then,
1T the proper distance, around the
bead. and again, In the beading with
another knot, so that each bead Tor
set Of beads, ii more than one Is de-
sired on each loopl Is entirely SCI
cure, both in itself and as regards Its
neighbors.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
NOTICE Oh ELECTION


A Special Election IS hereby called
ii and for the city Ct Lakeland,
State Of Florida. to be held on the
sOth day Of December, A. D., 1911,
Tor the purpose Of submitting to the
qualified voters Of the city Of Lake
land the question Of issuing Munic-
ipal Bonds for the purpose Of con-
structihg a system Of Sewerage, paw
ing streets and Sidewalks, and
Public Buildings, including
a Fire Station, Jail and enlarging
the city Hall. Said Election to be
neld and certified in accordance with
the Ordinance Of the city OF Lake
land providing for the holding and
certifying OF general Elections, ex-
cept as provide dby Ordinance num-
her 1872. calling said Bonding Elec-
ton.
Three Bond Trustees shall be
elected at said Election, who shall
compose a Board Of Public Works.
JOHN F. cox,
Mayor Of the City Of Lakeland.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
FOR THE COMPLEXION CLOTH



The fashionable girl uses q touch Of
powder and 4 bit Of rouge Of an eve
ming and IS scarcely ashamed 81 IT.
why not make the most Of ourselves
II we have the power to do 30? we
Increase the loneliness Of our clothes
by little individual touches-why mot
apply the same rule to the complexion?
Anyway, we all do it, whether we are
ashamed To admit It or not. and il il
well to know a way always to have
Cd hand stock Of complexion cloths.
Once used for rouge, the cloth should
not be washed, because the color viii
certainly get into some other piece in
tie laundry and it Is best to discard
altogether when it has been used a few
times II one wears soft mercerized
underwear. one need never be at 4
loss for powder rags. Cut into squares
Or circles. as one prefers, and By
means of q pinklng iron, for sale 1T
any hardware store for three cents,
edge the rag" In dainty scailops.
which does away with hemming, and
the toilet table accessory which is the
one real necessity may be finished in
dainty stacks in any quantity at no
expense
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
Ex-CONGREssMAN HERE.

Rev. J. p Botkin. Of winfield.
Kansas, is In Lakeland looking over
the property Of the Lakeland Good
homes Co.. 90 representative Of a
number Of people from Kansas who
are contemplating purchasing tracts
near Clay Center. Mr. Botkin il 4
Methodist minister. represented the
State Of Kansas as Congressman at
Large IN 1896 and was tho Demo
cratic nominee for Governor in 1908.
He Is very much Impressed with the
beautiful country surrounding Lake
land and Il Is hoped that be VIII d.
eide to come here to make his per-
manent home.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
NarrnN EnIfa.

While belts are by NO means gen.
orally worn, the fashionable belt Of
the moment, when it Is In evidence, Is
about an inch and a half II width and
b made Of black patent leather deco
rated with d buckle to match, Or with
al antique silver one. A perfectly plain
belt has its ,votaries, and II usually
to be preferred, but ii some cases an
introduction ii made Of tiny white but
ton trimmings, which look very smart
indeed when The buttons are clustered
at the back In a pyTamidaI form DE-
signed to give grace to the figure.
Marrow satin BELTS are being em-
pIoyed, also, and some Of the dress
makers introduce by their means 3
contrast III colors to the rest Of the
costume. using shades 0f pink blue
and mauve most dextsrously folded
into tha narrow compass 81 their COM
an6
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1911-12-27
The Seven Ages Of the Christmas
Turkey.

The Seven Ages Of the Christmas
Turkey.
All the worlds platter
And all the men and women merely eats
ers
They have with them -lways their appe.
tifes.
And one turk IN his time plays many
parts,
His acts being seven ages: at arat lis
roast,
Reposing grandly on the grooming board.
thanked by rich dressing and cranberry
sauce,
A dainty dish to set before the king:
Then the warmed over bird served up
next day.
Lest we forget the Yuleride's merry meal
Then the cold cuts. at luncheon ana Al
tea,
still succulent, If you do like cold cuts.
Next comes the stew. yclept d frlcassee
VITA dumplings made TO fatten W the
dish
And which, forsooth. do cause Id many
groans
And pangs Of Indigestion; then crouusttes
Garnished with parsley cunningly and
with what suspiciously doth taste iike
veal
And 30 they play their part. The sixth
age shifts
Into the lean and languid turkey hash.
RepOsing on d slab Of soggv toast.
"A bitter aftermath OF glories past.
For t0othless age. Last scene Of all
That ends this strange, eventful history
A skeleton, a rack Of clean picked bones.
That finds Its dismal way into the soup
OF second childishness and mere oblivion.
Sans breast, sans legs, sans wings, cans
everything. -Sam q Stinson.