davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Schatchens Raise Price of Husbands

first been agreed upon. The tears Of the
bride-elect the pleadings of friends could
not move him. so the relatives of the young
woman had to rush about to procure the
extra money demanded before the cere-
mOny could proceed.
The college graduate is in greatest de-
mand in the East side matrimonial market
and usually brings the highest price. At
times he cannot be obtained at any price.
young man about to be graduated from
a medical school was recently approached
by scatchen with most flattering offer
Of marriage, which included a big dowry to
support the young physician while he
worked up a practice. He refused the pro-
pOsal and declared that he could not be
bought" He said that he would choose
his own bride when he got ready to marry.
Many Of the American born girls do not
take kindly to the transactions OF the
schatchen. When asked TO dress up for the
appearance of possible suitors one Of them
objected most strenuously. II don't want
any men coming here to examine me as II
we're a horse for sale" she Indignantly
protested, and wanting to know how much
money they will get with me. / don't want
TO get married at all II do marry II will
be for love, I'll not be bargained for"
In spite OF the present rebellious attitude
OF youths and maidens, although they may
not know IL, the schatchen has a hand IN
bringing about many marriages among both
the rich and the poor. The cost OF his SER
vices is higher than before. Formerly he
received from l TO per cent Of the dowry
Today he asks 8 per cent of small dowiies
and from 20 to per cent of the larger
ones. .r+,.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Wisdom from Babes

Mother. said a little girl. returning
from the park, 'T gave an old woman a
drink OF water from my silver cup. and
she said Thank you so beautifully that
1t made me feel good"
Here. then, is the medicine for any one
who feels discontented or unhappy. Let
him do a thank you" work of kindness
every hour, and he win feel good
The ground was covered with snow, and
little Charlie was trying to dig a path
from his door to the sidewalk. All he had
to work with was small shovel, but he
worked with will, for his mother smiled
at him from the window where she sat
watching
A man>passed and, stopping to watch the
boy, ne feelingly remarked
How do you expect to get through that
drift with such a shovel7"
by keeping at IT," said the boy, cheer
fully smiling back at him; that's how"
Mother was very busy busting and
Strengthening up the house. Little Lucy
was helping.
II declared said mother; II never saw
so much dust. wonder where II comes
FROM
TT knew I'd tell YOU" answered Lucy.
you don't even know what dust is"
"Oh, yes, 1 do. motherl II is mud with
the juice squeezed out"
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
The Tired Business Man
RI wALTER A sINCLAIR.

SO they tuave orgsnized poets union.
exclaimed Ffiend wife, II suppose they
will only poet eight hours a day"
Anything to restrict poeting will be vel
come" said the Tired Business Man.
Poets are bores not made. There are too
many Of them Running around offering to
burst into lines beginning with capital let
tiers and ending In rhymes, and as a re-
suit they can't EXPECT to get good wages.
II they can. perfect. this union and get
closed shop. poets .wili be able to support
their muses. and, there won't be so much
inferior work DONE.
a. manufacturer OF staple poetry
couldn't take a"chanee with depressing a
poet II NE Belonged to a union. Just think
of the awful predieament a poetry foundry
owner would be IN IL walking delegate
struck the Job lust as the poet had got
about as far as this
- " % fen and uuagmIre darkled DER,
o fatliomisss and hidden shore!
look up 10 thy roof OF silver
And think.
why the wholeot would come 70
stop. The manufacturer couldn't get
strike breaker % so in and finish up that
poem. Il would take first class poet TO
fix up q standard. flawiess rhyme for
silver 1 doubt whether a journeyman
poet SQpio 90 IL even lis Clhch thal IL
strike breakers were put on the Job It
wouldn't be any time before they would
be splitting infipitlves all over.
Many people think that being a poet is
like being a hotel man or an editor or a
preacher not requiring any training what
ever. but not 30. not 30. OF course, any
one without any previous course in steam
fitting or premeditatiOn can reel off any
thing like this
" . green eheese moon,
You big balloon,
/ love to spoon
And Groom a tune.
In June so soon
I'll be a loon,
So grant this boon,
. green cheese moon.
"Or words to that effect But to sit
down and turn out these neat little jig
saw scrolls that lit in the odd spaces Of
magazines where the stories don't come
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Lenrninr AZ onInkIr.

The new girl had been but three weeks
in the employ OF an artistic family, but
her time had evidently not been spent ex-
clusively in studying the domestic arts.
As her mistress was giving her instructions
about the dinner she said:
And, Marie, don't forget the potatoes. -
mo, madam" was the rsply. WIN you
have them in their jackets or in the mood -
-Everybodys.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Pretty Wall Out Up

Not lOas ago there was held in a New
England town an exhibition under the
auspices Of an ancestral loan society"
and among the proud exhibitors was a
apinster who showed several fine portraits
of her great grandfather. an officer in the
revolutionary war.
A friend was remarking TO the spinster
that she Aeemed proud indeed OF her vaii-
ant ancestor. "A brave maR," exclaimed
the friend. Nk.
'BrRvegs repeated the descendant of the
great man. 81 should say he was brave!
Why, he took part In over fifteen engage
ments, and there was hardly one in which
he didnts lose an arm or leg or some
g!"-Eserybody's %tS
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
sIiEhted.

Couldn't speak 10 me las night,
Cause yO' had a beau;
Ao' lax you had los yo' sight.
Knowed 20 hadn't, though.
You know Wen l come long by
70 jes' helt 20 haid as high
LAX yo'd business IN the sky.
Wen yo' com into de chu'ch
Wouldn't rotice me;
Well. I ain a-carin much
Cause 30 didn't see.
On'y ] want yo' 4 know
Dat wen you amt got no beau,
Needn't speak Z me no mo.
VIII Herbert In Every body's.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Whenever an author puts old truths
in the mouths OF homely character given
10 apostrophiEing he skates on thin ice
with bsnality signs stuck up all around
him. Clara e. Laughlin. In her new novel.
Just Folks" scstters wise saws in vari-
Gus dialects literally through her text.
Here are a few reflections on the unIovsly
character Of man:
Men is a terrible lot o trouble L break
in"
Il behave tbs in the nature Of livery
woman L want a man L try her hand
on"
Men want made 10 dream about; they
was made Z develop womAn's Christian
character. New York Sun.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Couldn't Resist.

Teaeher-If any little girl knows the an
swer. let her hold up her hand, Well.
Nettie, what it is?
Nettie (aged 81 don't know.
Teacher-Then why did you hold up your
hand7
Nettie-I couldn't help it, just had to
show the new ring got for Christmas
Human Life.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

MOTHERHOOD. how often have I asked you
to stop! You mustn't tease baby In that
manner.
Bob-In what manner must. / tease him?
He's only kid. and won't know one man.
ner from another
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Daily Health Hint

There is a tendency nowadays TO overdo
what you have aptly termed physical
straining.' What we need 70 develop is
not so much strength as heaith-not big
punches of unhandsome muscles, but sup
pleness especially OF the spinal column.
In this think you will fully agree with
me. To the average person, employed In
sedentary work, big muscles are useless"
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

That hunted frightened, snattered man.
The lokesmith's type pedestrian,
Should be among the first 70 so
To see an automobile show;
Tis likely he might fine points see
Not noted In the host which he
Has met, which bumped him over moons
or mashed him fiat In bright cartoons.
.-r 7. n ~.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Smart Sayings

manipulating spectators have succeeded
at various times in cornerlng all the mar
kets of foodstuffs-except the grain Of
truth.
A book entitled The Milk Of Human
Kindness" has been sent US to review
We have unfortunately had only time to
skim through IT,
A tombstone is not such a bad thing
after all; Il generally has good word for
man when he is down.
Sometimes woman understands enough
not to understand.
II ignorance is bliss why should we wish
to see ourselves as others see us?
Truth Is stranger than fiotion--but not
90 popular
Brevity lie the soul OF wit-but brevity
In your bank account finds you at your
wits end
The only secret that seems to be well
kept in this world is that OF success.
Debts are like automobiles: we rush into
them and crawl out the best way we can.
A real friend will stand by you to the
last dollar But 1t has to be your dollar.
The man who hesitates is soon married.
while the woman who does so isn't
Misfortunes are sent TO annoy and amuse
our friends Smart Set.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

real friend will stand by you to the
last dollar, But 1t has to be your dollar
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30
Just Poetry
A Man Of seIf-DenIaI.


lie had great schemes within his head
he patented folding bed, but though
he praised II loud and long he never
tried to sleep in It;
An airship wonderful he planned, OF nice
proportions, graceful grand, but he
was rather tlmorods when he was
asked therein to fit
with much ado he brought TO view a
fuel thai was wholly new; bus in the
furnace Of his homes1tie went on
burning chunks Of coalf
lie bad a novel &instTTmSht for hIring
fish, but when intent on gathering in
the hnny tribe he stuck TO the old
Uait and pole. ,,r .a'r
He had a preparation rare that he de-
clared would quick grow hair, but
never tried II on himself although his
hsad could boast no thateh;
He had devices to Hume the blackness
of the darkest room, but when he
wanted light himself he used an or
At last he studied out the ways by
which one could prolong ones days
but whether he should follow them
he was not ready to decide:
lie wavered, l regret to state, until Il
was by far too late, and he alas. I
srieXe to say, was only thirty when
Nathan NJ Levy in New York Sun.
Beautiful MaIdens.
Beautiful face, with the marks of the
Beautiful eyes with the look of the tears
saw you once In your bossomy beauty
Ere you were bruised with the blase Of
Beautiful lips, you are often quivering.
Beautiful bosom, you often sob;
once know you We're always singing
IN tune with your own heart throb
All, sorrow came to your too great loving
yo nUur mght song faltered and was a sigh
Aour eyes grew dull with the tears OF
your weeping,
iou learned that hearts joy can die
And so It is with beautiful maidens
SorroWs come as surely as years
anu lhe race and the eyes that were lovely
Grow sanity ssd-wlth tears.
-SHAEMUS OSHEEL.
A SuIDhide. .
why should I wear upon my head
a thing bizarre and queer
with stiff high brim and a rat-tail MUM.
Lake an Old Guard Grenadier?
Why should hoolt-and-eve rvsaIt
Up In odd cuirassed frocks
| WINE every female curve Is lost
And sense Of comfort mocks?
Why should practise Inartyrdom
And have to stand all day?
'S6Iralghtjackets are not in II when
ones stays are built au faltO
Why should ape the mop coiffure.
- me loFe-locks, and the sWirls
OF pile my aching brow with braids
And bargain-counter curls?
why De a Bromide? Why. in fact
DO all these stunts? I don't
| FOR I'm bold, brave Suiphlde and
Have learned to say. Il WON'T"
MAIZE V, Caruthers in Everybody's.
Why IL ItR
| We're ready to critcse errors sbrhad
When errors at home should be righted
our own sins are small or not noticed al
all ~
Faultfinding is ALWAYS farsigbtad
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Debts are like automobiles: we rush into
them and crawl out the best way we can.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

The man who hesitates is soon married
while the woman who does so isn't
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

We're ready to critcise errors abroad.
When errors at home should be righted
all ~
Faultfinding is always farsighted.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Misfortunes are sent to annoy and amuse
our friends.-smart Set
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

The only secret that seems to be well
kept in this world is that Of success
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Tells Friend wife That
Poets Are BOres, Not
Made.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Brevity is the soul OF Wit-but a brevity
in your bank account finds you at your
wits end.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

why be Bromide? Why. in fact,
do all these stunts? I don't
For I'm bold, brave Suiphide. and
Have learned to say II WON'T"
MAIZE V, Caruthers in Everybody's
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-01-30

Manipulating spectators have succeeded
at various times In cornerlng all the mar
kets Of foodstuffs-except the grain Of
truth.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13
[coNTINuEp.]
CHAPTER II.

= RRIvED at Phillips apart
~ ments In the Esplanade. Sam
hurried into an inner room.
4 \ Methodically he took cushions
from the couch and pillows from the
bed and piled them in a corner; then
he sat down against them with the
suit case between his knees.
Meanwhile Phillip, in the apartment
which had been turned into an office
for him. entered his record Of the
days business ON filing cards and upon
q huge diagram sheet, then wrote a
long aud careful letter. after which he
took pencil and paper from a drawer
In his desk and delved into numerous
books of statistics.
It was nearing 3 o'clock when boy
brought in two letters. One Of them.
In heavy, cream tinted envelope and
slightly fragrant, he opened and read
through with frown. A postscript at
the end, however. brought smile to
his face, and he stepped into the ad-
joining apartment. Sans eyes were
closed, but Phillip had no sooner set
foot In the room than he opened them.
black and shining and as expression
less as the eyes Of huge turtle. With
out moving he waited for Phillip to
address him.
'Lucy hasn't forgotten you, SAM"
said Phillip. Sans eyes glistened
"She suttenly is the most mischiev-
ousest pusson All even saw in nah
life" he exploded. and he ended with
a shrill falsetto chuckle.
"Her mistress writes" went on
Phillip. glancing at the letter again:
s'Lucy is turning pale since your visit
to Forest Lakes, and think she is
pining away for Sam. She asked yes
terday when he was coming back.
When is her"
Sam bent over the suit case and
slapped his legs In a paroxysm Of de-
Light. "Ah suttenly Is lady kiileh."
said he.
Phillip. laughing, returned to his Of
dee and, tearing the letter once across,
dropped it into the wastebasket with
q gesture Of almost contempt; then he
opened the second letter. one addressed
In girls hand, but arm one. This,
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13

puuvu nsoJxD0nsm. mat which I'M
proves the mental condition and i'm
creases hope will improve the debii
ity. When ambition and interest In
work are lost erectness and initia-
tive are also lost. Ageing is In great
part due to mental influences. Mental
stimulation through physical infiu
ences Is the natural method of over.
coming mental depression. Phos-
phorus and arsenic are useful drugs
Cor this purpose. Hygienic and die
tetic measures to lessen waste are
useful. Food should be nutritious and
such a. require little digestive effort
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13
How's Tnis7

We offer One Hundred Dollars Re-
ward for any case of Catarrh that..can-
not be cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
F. ]. CHENEY & Co., Toledo, o.
We, the undersigned, have known F.
j. Cheney for the last Is years. and
believe him perfectly honorable in all
business transactions, and financially
able to carry out any obligations made
by his firm.
INVADING, KINNAN & MARvN,=
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo. O.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken inter.
nally, acting directly upon the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system.
Testimonials sent free. Price, 75c.
per bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Take Halls Family Pills for consti-
patton.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13
Invisible Indians.

All Indians seem to have learned .
wonderful way of walking unseen
making themselves invisible like Ger.
tain spiders which in case Of alarm.
caused for example by bird alight-
ing on the bush their webs are spread
upon, Immediately bounce themselves
up and down on their elastic threads
SO rapidly that only a blur is visible.
The wild Indian power Of escaping
observation. even where there is little
or no cover to hide In. was probably
slowly acquired In hard hunting and
lighting lessons while trying to ap-
proach game. take enemies by sur
prise or get safely away when COM
PEELED to retreat. And this expert
ence transmitted through many gen.
erations seems at length to have b.
come what is vaguely called instinct.
John Muir in the Atlantic.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13

puuncss w rne-Jonts Ii due to hard
ening Of the ligaments and moist heat
followed by massage is Of temporary
benefit The use Of cane for sup
port In walking. and a comfortable
armed rocking chair to support the
arms. helps to acquire better posi-.
ton. True senile dementia due to
senile changes in the brain Is pro-
gressive enfeeblement Marked i'm.
provement follows small doses OF NOR.
phine. This is only temporary and q
habit may be formed.-Medical REQ
ord.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13
LUCY HASN'T FORGOTTEN You, SAM"

LUCY HASN'T FORGOTTEN you, SAM"
too. he read with frown. but It was
one Of surprise. A ring Of the tele-
phone interrupted his musing.
"Mr Rensselaer," he repeated into
the telephone. "Send him right up"
There came a knock at the door, and
he opened 1t to let young Rensselaer,
In.
you're just In time. Bert" he de-
clared. What have you to do this
EVENING"
Anything or nothing" replied Rens-
selaer. "At 3 o'clock all / want to
do is get as far away from the mutton
abattoir as possible and forget all
about II until the next morning. But
what reckless dissipation have you In
mindw
II have some friends over In New
Jersey that I am more or less obliged
to see," replied Phillip. land I thought
you might sacrifice yourself enough
to run over with me. / understand it's
only an hour and half II you take the
tunnel frankly, want to get into
the subway. to smell the subway
smell, and renew. II ! can. the i'm.
pressions of novelty that ] enjoyed in
my boyhood. You see. I was only a
kid the last time was here"
"It must have seemed a wonderful
place to you then" said Rensselaer,
"For myself. I'd rather be cow
puncher than anything can think Of.
but my respected auntie can't conceive
Of ones living anywhere else than In
or near Manhattan. and. moreover. she
fears I might contract misalliance
out west, as she still declares my "a
Their did"
THAT was his one best trick. wasn't
itr' inquired Phillip.
mo doubt Of It." returned the other.
~Tm the first Rensselaer, In q hundred
years who has been able to battle
without the aid Of valet and the first
enc to have blood enough to gush
when hs was cut. and my mother
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13

"Pm mighty glad to see you.' she
said, shaking hands with him. and her
tired eyes grew trifie brighter. my,
how solid looking you've grown!
Seems to me you look as II you was
hunting for somebody to contrary you.
You didn't use to look that way
when you boarded with us-did he.
Elsie?"
Kelvin turned to Elsie. and In his
gaze Rensselaer, thought that he read
friendly admiration and nothing more.
His look had not that rapt eagerness
Of her gaze and never would have for
any woman, Rensselaer, found himself
deciding. He decided wrongly. Kel-
vim had found himself strongly drawn
to Elsie, but he sternly suppressed
that tendency as quickly as he recog-
nized 1t in himself.
'T don't know" replied Elsie to her
mothers question. There seems to be
some slight change. but to me he is
Just the same old Phillip, whom I'm
glad to see again and hope to see
often"
II suppose you're married BY this
time" suggested Mrs White.
II have never stayed in one place
long enough to get married, except In
Tennessee, and there was too busy"
laughed Phillip.
"Elsie has never forgot you" Mrs.
White next observed. "She thinks
about you all the time, and she's been
talking about you ever since we moved
away"
The connection Of Mrs. Whites re-
marks was so absurdly palpable that
Rensselaer, could not help letting his
eyes twinkle, and Elsie. catching his
glance Of amusement, laughed out
right. whereupon the two callers join
ed her. very much to Mrs Whites
surprise.
"You was mighty busy young man
even in that six months before we
moved away ratified on Mrs. White.
1--WE was all sorry we had to go and
leave you behind. and 1t nigh broke
Elsie's heart But she's KEEP track Of
you all right She made us take a
paper from back home on purpose
First we saw that you struck oil on
that cheap little two acres Of ground
you scraped together and bought, then
you bought some coal land and built a
foundry and railroad or what not
I don't know what all you done. but
Elsie can tell you every bit of It. from
A to lizard She's
Mother. did you call fatherT in
terrupted Elsie demurely.
Eyes. he'll be right in. He's out In
the garden pottering around. You
know be always was crazy about gar
dening, and he amt working now"
How are the rest Of the family"
Kelvin asked.
Both Elsie and her mother looked
concerned.
"Grace is married" said Mrs. White.
ED got his spine hurt In a football
game. and he's upstairs now. You
ways liked you so well. All three Of
the children did. for that matter. al
though none Of them put crown and
q royal robe on you like Elsie did. Yes.
you did. Elsie. you know you did. and
you never would give any encourage
ment to a beau from that day to this.
I'm afraid Eds going to be an invalid
all his life
"Oh. that must be seen to-" protested
Phillip. shocked I'm spite of his embar-
rassment. Perhaps a specialist could
bring him out all right"
Mrs. White shrugged her shoulders
despairingly Specialists cost money,
and we amt got it-not these times"
II fro BE CONTINUED
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1911-05-13
WHAT sENlLE DEBILITY IS
Waste u Muscle, Cartilage, Bono and
Nerve Tlssvs Consequent on I'm
paired Mstabolism.

I. L. Nascher. New York. says that
senile debility cannot be prevented.
but its effects can be relieved. the
mental attitude improved and q sem
blance Of vigor restored. The cause
H. waste of muscle. cartilage. bone
and nerve tissue. consequent on Iu.-