davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
SEEING THE GAME.

Milwaukee Sentinel.
He took his wife to see the game.
A frenzied fan was he
He called the players each by name,
Explained the pastime to his dame.
"Ah, yesl" she said. II see!"
The game waxed hot; the score was tie,
The home team up to bat.
He turned to her with cleaning eye.
Some camel he said. She made replyi
Amt that = fearful hat!'
When Bill McBiffer hit the sphere,
And knocked It out OF sight
He turned and hollered in her ear:
30, pipe that wallop, wife, dear!'
Quoth she: That hats a fright
And gaiy did the batters bling
And runners crossed the plate.
The fan, ali gladly did he sing!
Quoth she: That hats q cheap old thing
"A dollar ninety-eightw
And at the finish OF the strife
He whispered to his dame:
Believe me, twas some battle, Wife"
Her answer cut him like a knife.
Quoth she: who won the gamer
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
wom"n's DeplorabIe Points.

odIIIIIIUIb AInerIcan.
railroad gateman in Omaha. had hia
eye torn out by wom&n's hatpin. Enough
OF such deplorable accidents have resulted
to be a warning against the careless use
OF these sharp points projecting so far
beyond hatbrims as to be a menace both
to sight and life. While laughed at and
generally unsuccessful, the efforts to abate
this danger by legal restrictions are quite
In the public interest.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
MILWAUKEE, AND SOCIALISM.
One Experience Enough for Cream
City Taxpayers.
Milwaukee Evenlng WIsconsin.

City Taxpayers.
Milwaukee Evening Wisconsin.
Milwaukee has had a practical demon
etration of social democracy in operation,
and does not like it. The demonstration,
1t may be urged, had not gone very far,
but it had gone far enough to reveal an
immense incapacity. wild and creduIous
prediction to visionary innovations and
an utterly reckless waStSfulnsss OF the
peoples money.
1t was recognized that unwise and waste
full expenditures at the outset OF the new
regime would be only the prelude TO far
greater extravAgances in the future, the
programme for which was appalling to
people owning little homes and already
worried about the taxes.
This was the situation at the begin
ming OF the campaign, which ended when
the ballots were counted April l. Dur
ing the progress of that campaign, social
democratic candidates and speakers
made many ineautious revelations of want
of love for American institutions. Fur
thermore, they tried to profit by making
appeals to class hatred and by stirring up
religious prejudice.
The people OF Milwaukee did not like
so they rallied to the polls and voted
against the new party's candidates, not
one Of who was elected, nearly all Of whom
were buried under an adverse vote of z
to
The outlook for Milwaukee IL brighter
than Is was before
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

According to reports from Che seat
of war, Senator Norris Brown is
greatly perturbed for fear the little
controversy between the regulars and
insurgents may keep him out OF the
Craftsmanship of the committee on ter
ritories. That would, indeed, be a
terrible calamity to his Nebraska con-
stituency, which we all hope and pray
may be successfully averted.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
Insurgent Insincerity.
New York Tribune

new York Tribune.
Most of the republicans insurgents in
congress who are opposing the Canadian
reciprocity bill maintain that they want to
see the scope of that bill extended by in
cooperating into it the provisions of the
farmers free list bill But they are work.
ing for such an Incorporation as will kill
both bills which would probably suit their
real purposes much better than the passar ga
Of either.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
An Opening for the RecaII,

An Ohio lawyer who was disbarred for
contempt in campaign speeches telling
what he thought of Judge who was run
ming for reelection has been reinstated
by the legislature. A divorce of politics
and the judiciary in that state would leave
each to a state of single blessedness much
to be coveted
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The Indiana man who says clothes
are an evidence of insanity probably
would admit that all the citizens of
the Fiji islands were highly intellec-
tual gentlemen
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Down at Lincoln an enterprising
contemporary is holding the city cleo
ton in advance by postal card ballot.
The candidates for the various mu-
nicipal Offices, however, will wait for
certificates of election duly Issued ac-
cording to the official canvass.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The new president OF the Equitable
Life Assurance society is to get a
salary OF only $4,000 a year, as com
pared with the $4,000 salary paid to
the late Paul Morton, his predecessor.
Wonder II the difference measures the
market value OF Nebraska education
and training.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

it is costing them nothing. The
lecturer is a man Of means and loves
travel and all he asks from Los
Angeles is to be commissioned as its
commercial representative. lie pays
his own expenses There is no ques-
ton. of course as to the city's faith
in the serious results of the enterprise.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Another reason why members OF
the late legislature are so unanimous
for the constitutional amendment
cutting the time for introducing bills
down from forty days to twenty days
may possibly be found in the fact that
in the next sentence the amendment
raises the pay of our Lawmakers
from $500 per session to 5000.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
MARCH CIRCULATION.
48,Ol7

State Of Nebraska, county of Douglas IS;
Dwight Williams. circulation manager OF
The Bee Publishing Company, being duly
sworn. says that the average daily circu-
latlon, less spoiled, unused and returned
copies, for the month Of March, 1911, was
SOL DWIGHT WILLIAMS,
Circulation Manager.
subscribed In my presence and sworn to
before me this 31st day OF March, 1911
(Seal) ROBERT HUNTER,
Notary Public.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Some of the republican newspapers
In Missouri were so elated at the
thought of Missourian being elected
speaker that they forgot and threw
bouquets at Champ Clark.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Unwilling boarders at the city Jail
may now confidently approach Mayor
"Jim" for a ticket of leave by assur-
ing his honor" that pounding rock
would overtax their strength.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Prospects of New Depot Cheer
City. in st, Paul Pioneer
Press. They will also cheer the trav-
cling public, or that portion of it that
has had occasion to use the present
structure.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

A Kansas paper asks: What has
become of the old-fashioned man. who
used to tweak the little fellows
proboscis, show the ball of his thumb
between two fingers and say, There,
sonny, I've got your nose?'" He has
probably had his block knocked off by
sonny "
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The conversion of state banks into
national banks as consequence of
Nebraska's guaranty law goes steadily
on. But the predicted rush to take
out charters for new state banks is
not visible to the naked eye.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

According TO Official reports, 2,sl7
more single than married men were
arrested in Milwaukee last year.
Showing that men with wives to look
after them generally keep out of
trouble more.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

There are boy scouts and girl scouts
and just scouts, but the greatest
scout of them all just now is the
base ball scout.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Sometimes 1t seems as If those Har-
ward professors try to see Just how
brave they can be. Here is one de-
claring that women are nearer savage
than men.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The democratic house has now de-
cided to investigate the army What
If in the search it should find the muz-
zle of a gun or two?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

An unsophisticated man might
never suspect that there was a particle
of politics in the democrats attitude
toward reciprocity.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

OF course, neither Canada nor the
United States is promoting reciprocity
with the idea of getting the worst of
the deal
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Governor Hadley has Photographed
II to say, 1T is more desirable to be
right than president" But what a
bully thing to be right and president.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The archeologist who has discov-
cred that the Sphinx is a man and not
a woman has found out nothing new.
There never was a feminine sphinx.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

cracked up to be, and besides that,
the filling of every job is calculated
to make at least a dozen enemies and
one migrate
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
Smiles Behind the Kick.

New York World
In spite Of the danger from bullets cross
ing the Mexican boundary, Douglas, Ariz,
seems to have enjoyed the show
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Subscribers leaving the city tenn
pOrarily should have The Bee
mailed to them. Address will he
changed as often ms requested.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Those recipients of threatening let
ters should not be undulyj alarmed.
Even ordinary mortals like us editors
get them every little while.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Mr.. Bryan's Commoner says the
editor of the Richmond Dispatch is a
tool of the interests. Hammer or
monkey wrench?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Between 2OOO.O0O and 100000 bottles Of
high class conversation water" were de-
stroyed in the champagne war in France
Multiplying by two the number Of bottles
wrecked determines Its money value in
francs at home and in dollars abroad. A
tidy sum wrested by a thrifty people to
satisfy a grudge against a fortunate few
What was the trouble about7 The true
champagne district Of France is a limited
area Of fertile plain with distinctive geologi-
cal characteristics 100 miles east of Paris
Rocky barriers face east and south and on
these slopes are grown the grapes from
which the famous wine is made. 1t Ia
claimed that true champagne can only be
made from grapes grown in that district.
But the district could not produce all the
wne labeled champagne drunk in the
world. Adjacent vineyards produced
something just as good" something just
as sparkling and just as capable OF shap-
ing that awful head the morning after"
The difference between the two grades is
so slight that hardly one in 100000 could
detect the difference. The government
sought to confine the champagne label to
the product OF the favored district the ef-
feet OF which was depreciation Of the
value of the slightly inferior wine Max
ers of the latter protested and charged the
government agents with importing wine
into the district and labelling II champagne
Unable to secure hearing from the
authorities the protestants marched into
the favored district and smashed things
The rioters proceeding turned a searchlght
on a carefully devised plan to create a
champagne monopoly under the shelter OF
law.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The Commoner recently had an
article on the Passing of Plutocracy."
Fortunate Mr.. Bryan got in on it be-
fore it passed.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The governments order for the
shipment of 500 collins to Texas looks
like a concession.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
In Other Lands

Side lights on what il Trans
piring Among the Near and
Far nations OF the Earth
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

If Bill" Stone is aching for a fight
with those Mexicans let him slip on
his gum shoes and go to it.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The weather man is entitled to an
annual base ball pass without even
asking for it.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
TAPS ON THE FUNNYBoNE.

Man With the Bullying Brow-Wisdom
according to Solomon. brings length OF
days You ought to cultivate IT,
Man With the Bulbous Nose--Gosh The
days are too long for me as they are =
Chicago Tribune.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

They tell me tn guv'nor is doin a
great deal to tighten tn burdens Of tn
common people"
Guess likely he is. He's gettin' fifty a
night fer his talk on Reform an I'm told
he's payin off tn mortgage on his home
an putin money in tn bank. Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22
So Near ana Vet So Far.
Philadelphia Record.

Just seven states more are needed 20
raufy the income tax amendment to the
constitution out Of eleven that have yet
70 vote on H.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

still-there are skirts that beat
either hobble or harem.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Kansas City has a hotel where
there is not bellboy. 1t is the Girls
hotel
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

IT specks dars trouble comm to dat
gemman," said the waiter.
What's he been doin ?''
He done ordered deviled crab and angel
cake fob de same meal. Washington Star.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Bill, the Bachelor--Are you interested i'm
the Easter fashion parade.
Benedict, the Married Man-f you could
see the shrinkage in my envelope you
would not ask about any kind of a pay
raid.-Baltimore American.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Another ruction is on In Morocco. II
has three angles one each for the reignlng
sultan, Mulat Hafid. his brother Mulai
| Ismael, and the Ndeposed sultan Add FL
Aziz The latter has been out Of a Job for
about three years. His reign was dis
tinguished for it's modern progressive
spirit, and as a patron of the liberal arts
his generosity made statesmen leap with
| JOY and brought a succession of screams
from the taxpayers. The palace at Fe1
became museum for bicycles motor cars
monographs, moving pictures, sewing
machines and other up-to-date contrivances
that tickled the royal fancy But he neg
lected to coddle the tribesmen as diligently
as he did the statesmen, and woke I'D one
Zine morning to find q rifle at his nose
and scimeter tickling his spine. Sultan
Mulai Hafid took the opposite course.
eschewing modernism and procIairrinR
himself standpatter from sandal to fez
Mulat Ismael ia an unknown quality. but
eager for the Job. France and Spain are
watching the fracas, both evidently anx-
ious to butt in as soon as the conditions
afford an excuse for annexing a slice of
territory. The three-cornered affair evil
IDENTIFY has not assumed serious propor-
lions. The distinguished kidnAper and
bandit Raisuli maintains an attitude of
aloofness that indicates the scrap IL not
ripe for loot. When Raisuli takes the
neld the row will be worth while.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

You know, George, that you shouldn t
think of going to the opening game. Don /
you remember what DIR. Cutting said about
your throat?'
WHO? Doc. Cutting? why, Doc and |
are going to the game together. "-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

Does that long -haired Mr.. Snngsby get
much money from his writings ?'
Very little, l fancy. He got dollar n
word not long ago, however"
Mercy! How was that"
Why a man owed him 81. Slingsby
wrote Please remit on the bill and the
man sent him the money."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

The consumption of alcoholic drink in
the United Kingdom last year meant an
expenditure of t7s5.oOo,OOO by the consum-
ers; but, while this amount was somewhat
higher than in 1909. it was much less than
in 1899. when the British drink bill was
$3.50, 100000, almost a round billion. The
fact of a decreasing consumption is es-
tablished also by the marked decrease In
recent years in the Mortality from aloo-
holism and cirrhosis of the liver-the
scourge OF the dipsomaniac.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

To the French socialist an education
with faint of religion produces an effect
like the shaking Of red flag before a
Dull. The other day the socialist deputies
charged over the ministry because the gov
eminent had not closed a high school for
girls conducted by the Ursuline nuns at
Bazas In the Gironde department. Pre-
mler Monis' who had difficulty in getting
nearing said that the permission ac-
corded to the Ursulines to continue TO
teach in their school at Bazas was an act
OF grace which was rendered necessary by
the fact that the new secular school build
inss were not yet available The Ursulines
themselves were an authorized order by
virtue OF royal ordinance in 1s4S. They
had been allowed to keep open their school
until next July. Thereafter, socialistic
teachers will mould the plastic minds of
the girls of Bazas.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

MY constituents never fail 10 accord me
continuous applause" remarked Senator
Sorghum, hopefully.
Yes replied Farmer Corntossel. "A
lot o. folks out our way would rather
hear themselves cheer than listen to an.
other man alk."-Washington Star.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

''She claims a perfect allbi."
What is her alibi?'
she says that she can prove that al
time the crime was committed her lit
girl was brushing her hair
That proves an abb for her hair,
how about Observation-Disclosures Post
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-04-22

IcroHchments on the sovereignty of states
moved by leaps and bounds. Last year a
decision by the High Court set a definite
limit to federal power in state matters.
and forced the federal authorities IN
measures calculated to wipe out most of
the rights hitherto vested in the states
For this purpose four amendments TO the
constitution have been submitted to the
electors FOR ratSication or rejection. The
first gives Parliament power To Iato
trade and commerce.; the second. IN chn-
troll trading, financial and mining COM
panies operating in one state; the third
relates to this settlement Of disputes; and
the fourth gives Parliament power over
trade monopolies and combines. These
-FOUR propositions are included in one ballot
second separate ballot will enable the
electors, including men and women. 70 "a "
whether the federal Parliament shall hava
power to specify what constitutes =
monopoly That the conservative element
regards these propositions as a menace 70
evident from the ominous words of thu
sydney Herald, which says: The con-
stitution is not only to be amended out ~
existence, and the states DESTROYED. but
the High Court is to 20. II =, o.
the peoples will that the commonwealth
10 De supreme and Is to develop upon
the mere shred Of q constitution, there
can be nothing more to say. But II IL per-
rectly clear to thoughtful minds that tba
end OF 1t all must be anarchy and civil
war. These are dire words 10 write. hut
they are written in grim earnest, ana we
believe they represent the truth"
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-11-25
Was 1t Accident
Or the Result Of Effort?

A Connecticut octogenarian has
worked for SO years on an invention
and has made more than geo models,
each OF which was unsuccessful ex-
cept the last one. He has sold his
invention for a big fortune.
Many times l was disheartened and
was about to smash my models and
give up" he says. but then thought
that if I kept on trying had a chance
to win, while if 1 quit there was no
chance at all. At last, by accident,
7 hit upon the secret"
BY accident? Isn't the OLD man in
error here?
Is the result of so years work an
accident?
All inspirations. ideas and mechani-
cal secrets" come We know not how
or whence. but they come only to the
mind that is prepared.
Ideas are opportunities or,ly to the
mind that can grasp them and utilize
them.
1t took so years of study and experi-
ment on the part of this man to fit
him TO comprehend a certain mechan-
zeal principle. There was no accident
about it
The real basis of his success was his
persistency. A million men would
have given up in failure. He realized
that his only chance of winning lay
in continued trying. and he, the one
man in d million, kept on
The milton who would have quit
saw II was luck" with him But there
was no luck" except that which is
the natural fruit OF persistent effort.
The his-ory OF every successful mar
reads much the same. Whatever his
work. he raste-e6 Il and grateful NJ
t1Ire yielded TITO hts carable hands
her secrets fea1or1stv guarded from tn
unworthy
THE keynote 70 most fa''p1res Is ths'
de+es+ahla rf,-a~e Y can't" You vo~'f
ind ~ m ~ foefer anywhere w'7c
VIII rot ter vou that he hss found
out there is no use in trying. "Luc's'
Is against him. he says: and so 1t is:
luck is AGAINST any man who sees NJ
use in trying.
We may think we have failed So
often that 1t is impossible for us tc
succeed. It's nonsense. There is nc
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-11-25
SATURDAY. NOVEMBER rs. 1911.
Justice Demands
The Life Penalty.

With all of its horrible details the
Beattie murder case was brought to a
close when he was executed by the
Virginia authorities yesterday morn
ing. That the execution was a just
one no one doubts now since he made
confession that he was guilty and
II should serve as a warning to those
who regard the taking Of human life
so lightly.
The Beattie case has created much
comment throughout the country for
the reason that the crime was such a
horrible one, and sympathy for the
young wife was manifest on every
hand, while many others felt that the
circumstantial evidence was not con-
elusive and that he was convicted on
account of his relations with the Bin
ford girl.
In the annals of American history II
would be hard to find more bastard
- crime than the one which was COM
mitted within the borders of the great
commonwealth of Virginia, and the
people of that state have gone on
record as favoring punishment of crime
as it should be punished.
Technicalities. chicanery and the
Willingness of the American people to
give a criminal another chance to do
better Is unquestionably responsible
for many murders in this country to-
day. and if Virginia's example is fol-
lowed by other states human life would
not be held so lightly as is now the
case.
Life sentences in the penitentiary
may amount to more punishment than
death. but few criminals ever serve
out their sentences and if it were gen
orally understood that ones life would
be demanded upon conviction of muir
der there would be few murders to-
day.
Governor Mann did his fun duty to
the people he is serving when he re-
fused in any way to interfere with the
natural course of the law, and while
his sympathy for the faithful father
must have been great, still there is q
duty that officials owe to mankind and
the punishment CT crime is one u
them.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1911-11-25
Catarrh Doctor
You Can Get the Best One in
the World for $l.OO

Go to V. F. Balkcom Drug Co today
Say 1 want HYOMEI outfit" take ii
home with you, open the box and pour
a few drops of HYOMEI pronounce il
Hfgh-o-ne) into the little hard rub
Der inhaler
Then breathe pleasant, soothing
healing, germ killing HYOMEI over
the raw. iniamed, germ ridden mem
brane for a few minutes and relief
is immediate.
Stuffed UP head viii vanish. Keep
up the treatment four or FIVE times a
day for a few days and hawking. spit
ting and forming of mucus in the nose
and throat will cease
. HYOMEI is guaranteed to end ca
tarrh, coughs. colds, Group, asthma,
catarrhal deafness. or money back
Complete outfit $1.00, subsequent bot
ties If needed so cents at V. F. Balk-
com Drug Co. and druggists every
where.