The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1911-12-27
gave you the scheme?" asked Mrs.

1T did. l was in the library trying
to find some further information I'M.
der the head of Ducks but was un.
able to do go. The encyclopedia seems
never to have heard Of it."
And your idea is to charter a shin
and proceed to this island and load
her with ducks eggs" was asked.
Better Than Finding North Pole.
Precisely. l have figured that l
can stow away 100000 eggs at each
cargo and make three trips a year.
There will be fresh eggs waiting for
me every trip. l think I can contract
half a million dozen eggs in advance.
I shall take possession Of the island
on my first trip in the name Of the
United States and name it Bowser is-
land. 1t will. of course, be named for
me alone.
There is the whole scheme, and I'd
like to know what you think of it.
Isn't 1t a sure thing? Isn't it better
than discovering the north pole? Are
there any gold mines in the west to
beat It? You have called me an easy
mark and a visionary, but 1 guess you
will have to take it back, eh?"
"Have you figured on the expenses?''
asked Mrs. Bowser, with sinking heart
and realizing that there was another
row on tap.
I'm a general way, yes. They won't
amount to much in comparison with
the profits. probably a tenth Of the
profits. l suppose the natives can be
hired to gather and stow the eggs
aboard for a few yards of calico cloth
per day. The live ducks, of course,
come in crates-twenty-four ducks to a
crate"
"You have figured very close"
That's me-that's Bowser. always
figure very close when l am going into
anything. That's the reason it turns
out a success. You haven't told me
just what you think Of the scheme
yet"
II am naturally biased in your IA
vor, and for that reason l wish you
would go over and consult with the
druggist. He is a very practical man,
you know"
YES" replied Mr.. Bowser as he re-
membered how many times that same
druggist had called him an idiot.
Eyes. he's practical, but l think l can
manage this affair without him. He'd
naturally be jealous, you know"
Druggist Listens Patiently.
Mrs. Bowser argued the matter.
however. She admitted that Mr.. Bow
ser was as smart and keen as a Wall
street broker. but hints from other
smart men were not to be despised.
After a little f~1attery of this sort the
ducks eggs man sailed forth. He
was greeted with a CHEEKY welcome
at the drug store. and two customers
were kept waiting while he told his
story. The druggist listened with
close attention, and when the story
was finished he slapped Mr.. Bowser
on the shoulder and exclaimed:
Good for YOU, old man. You've
surely struck 1t this time"
"Do-do you mean it,"
"Surely 1 do"
"Then I-I"-
1.-THE very first cargo Of eggs and
ducks will pay your board in a. luna
tic asylum for ten years."
Mr.. Bowser walked out Of the store
and kicked at a dog and bullied a
tramp and then sat down on the curb
stone of a side street until a police
man came along and said If he didn't
move on he'd get his neck broken.
MIS- Bowser was in bed and asleep
when he came ~sneaking in, but she
reused up enough to hear him say to
himself:
This is the last straw. and divorce
must surely follow. She put the Job
up. and she must suffer for it."