davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
TIRED OF TRIAL. MARRIAGE
colored Msn Fell Into the Trap and
Had liad tsothing But
Ifibulation.

"T'anky, sali: t'anky.r gratefully
said kle-looking colored citi-
zen who had percolated into the Office
Of prominent attorney OF Polkvflie.
Arkansas. "And dis yuh am what yo'
kin do for muh. cuhnel II yo' please;
wants to Eli ATS trial marriage dat III
into busted It'll SOS / kin Git out'n 1t
ag'in
Trial marrlage-?" echoed the
legal lumiuarv
"fessah Dat's what It's done been
"a trial--fnn de beginnin' twell
plumb yit! Trial, sah--trial and trib-
bylation, all de time. And knowed
how 'twouid be befo' | got into de
trap. Didn't want to marry, nohow:
alus was uh.skeered o. de marryin'
notion and now
We'll. then, why did You marry II
you didn't want to-"
"Who?-~me? Eh-kaze I halter, sab,
Halter do ii; dat's why Oar want
no way round III! twu2 de law, When
dat ar faiIer lady fell into de creek
at do picnic all ! plunged in an drug
her out az de risk o. muh life, right
dar, sal ! gct Zip a'gin de law-de
marrylewl Dc young white men told
me bout II, soon 8 dey found out
what Ia done; hadn't Untold me lid
uh-gone hont muh bidness like fool
twel landed In de penitenchy for
muh ignunce, Dey done told me what
was 'bieesed to doman saves a
oman luna drownin' he's sho' gotter
marry her Foced to do 1t. sab an
done did II An now. cuhnel, for good
ness sake won't yo' please tell muh
how to sit 0utn do scrape? Kin git
q divo'ce. or suppin'. or must take
de lady down to de creek whuh drug
her ont an th'ow her In agin ?"-1om
P. MOrga@ In Puck
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
MIRACLE IN THE MELONS
Where Do Those In Oklahoma Get
the Water In a Season Of
Drought?

Bishop Quarle of the Methodist
Episcopal church spoke at a camp
meeting, and referred to miracles
about which people talk so much. He
said down in Oklahoma they have not
had a good ground-soaking for two
years, nor have they had any dew on
the ground for many long morning.
The crops are parched and the fruit
grows pale But the watermelons come
up, verdant and rotund, and filed
with water.
Where does the water come from?
There is your miracle. How is 1t pos
sible for that great, Juicy core to
come out of that parched ground.
Talk about turning water into wine,
why, here is case where you turn
dry clod into a honeycomb. There is
a big redcored watermelon, gouge the
heart out of 1t, stuff the laughing
mouth with It, and then philosophize
to your hearts content about the i'm
possibility of that hard, dry soil, in
which there is not enough moisture
to give drink to q flea.
How much do you philosophize on
this miracle? Not at all. You Just
eat the miracle, make 1t part of your
joy. and thank the good Lord that
this is still an age of miracles.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
cLEWS REVIEWS STOCKS
Weekly Letter Defines Brokers'
Views on Recent Depression
and the Outlook,

New York, Sept, ga Depression
and nervousness have again ruled
the Stock Exchange. No account
was taken OF Improvement in the
Moroccan situation, the satisfactory
condition of our foreign trade, the
strengthened condition Of American
banks or the fact that wte have
been able to loan large sums to p'u-
rope and take back considerable
amounts of stocks sold by foreign
owners. Nor was any account, Ca&-
en- of Improvement in the crop 5lta-
alton, or the knowledge that our
crops will be above average in quau-
tity, that they will bring good
prices and insure the American
farmer another year Of prosperity,
that the distribution Of cotton goods
has been accelerated by price con-
cessions and that the cotton goods
industry is being somewhat relieved
by the decline in cotton, that the
iron trade Is more active and that n
larger volume OF business has been
done Thanh is generally realized hes
cause, of price concessions or that
the exports Of steel manufactures
are running upon an Unprecedented
scale. While there are many rea-
sons for disbursement, there are
also numerous reasons for encour-
agement such as those just men
toned In the present state Of pub
lie temper, however they receive no
At the moment the
Street appears to revel in pessimism.
The strained monetary conditions
abroad arising from the continued
fall in securities served to aggrayate
the depression here, particular at
tention being paid to the simultan-
eous advance in all the principal
foreign bank rates and the decline
in British Consols- the latter due
entirely ito the ability Of capital
to secure better rates than az per
cent.
The Presidents address on the
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
Music by Electricity.

The "telharmonium, invented by DR..
Thaddeus Cahill, furnishes what is
called electric music" not merely as
a transmitter and imitator, but as di-
rect producer of musical tones by
means of alternating electric currents.
By combining these currents in differ
ent ways the operator at the key
board produces different qualities of
tone. Dr. Cahill has recently made i'm
proyements which render the instru-
ment capable of producing all sorts of
entirely new tones of its own, while
its Imitation Of trumpets, horns, yiols
and violins may be so perfect as to de-
ceive even the practiced ear of mu-
steal nearer A single receiver, 1t is
said, responds satisfactorily to any
sound from deepest bass to highest
treble, and TO single note of pure
tone to a full chord Of composite
tones.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
The Cry of the Guinea.

City folk visiting country neighbors
where guinea fowl are kept have oft
en- wondered at the cry of those Pre-
tentious creatures Probably no other
member Of the feathered tribes emits
a cry as exasperating to human listen.
ers as that Of the guinea fowl The
average man rarely hears it without
secretly longing to throttle the throat
from which 1t came.
Yet It has its uses Guinea fowl are
the policemen OF the poultry yard,
They serve as guards to give other
fowl warning of the approach Of dan
ger. whether 1t be In the form of
thieves, dogs, hawks or crows. The
cry of the guinea is said to be terrify-
ing to hawks and other predatory
birds, and 1t has prevented many a
raid upon tempting focks of poultry.
But the fact remains that 1t is an az
front to the human ear.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
MUST NOT TAKE ANY RISKS
Lincoln Beachey's story Shows That
It Ia Same In Aviation
as In Love- "a

Lincoln Beachey, afr his flight
over Niagara Falls in biplane was
congratulated on his daring by re-
porter
But / wasn't daring" the aviator
said Il put my machine only to such
ordeals as knew it could withstand.
In flying, as in love, we must run no
risks"
He laughed softly
II know he said, "a young woman
about to we'd who decided at the last
moment, to test her sweetheart. So,
selecting the prettiest girl she knew.
she said to her, though she knew 1t
was great risk:
"Tll arrange for Jack to take you
out tonight--a walk on the beach in
the moonlight, lobster supper and all
that sort of thing and | want you in
order to put his fidelity to the proof
to ask him for kiss
"The other girl laughed, blushed
and assented. The dangerous plot was
carried out Then, the next day. tho
girl in love visited the pretty one and
said anxiously:
"Well, did you ask him?'
"No, dear
NO? Why not?
"'I didn't get chance. He asked
ME first"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
Incompatible Old Maids.

"Her education in youth was not
much attended to, and she happily
missed all the train OF female garni-
ture which passeth by the name Of ac-
complishments. She was tumbled ear
ly, by accident or Providence, into a
spacious closet of good old English
reading, without much selection or
prohibition. and browsed at will upon
their fair and wholesome pasturage.
Had ! twenty girls they should be
brought up in exactly that fashion. l
know not whether their chance In
wedlock might not be diminished by
It, but can answer for 1t maketh (if
worst comes to worst), most incom.
parable old maids From Essays Of
Ella.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25

A noble lord in The Midland coun.
ties has fayoltte mare named "The
Cook" apropos of which the follow.
ing incident recently occurred:
Lord TO groom, who appears with
his arm in a sling and his face GOV.
cred with sticking-plaster and
scratchesl: Good heavens. Bates!
What's the natter"
Bates-'Its all on account of your
lordship's orders. You says TO me
last night as 'ow The Cooks girths
was too tight, and you gave me or.
ders to loosen EN-. wash 'er down,
curry-comb 'er, and put er in the
loose box, Cook. wot's indoors, over
heard you, and, as she don't know the
names of the osses. TUX 1t personal
and went for me suddenIike- and
er--well, look at me!"--London Tit
Bits.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
inside the Empty Fire Box.

seen, this device Is placed inside the
empty fire box, having four side
frames which rest on the regular
CRATE, and the auxiliary crate is sus.
pended several inches below the I'M
der side Of the stove top. AS the hot-
tom Is perforated, a sufficient draft Ia
provided, and also ease of access TO
the fire with the poker for raking out
the dead ashes from the bottom
While the FIRE is necessarily thin and
light, it provides plenty of heat for
cooking meal, and soon burns itself
out after accomplishing its purpose,
OF course. the device Is not confined
to coal for fuel. but will operate
equally as well with wood, charcoal or
coke.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25

y STOCKS, BONDS. CEREALS -

Sherman act on Tuesday Was at first
somewhat misunderstood il craat-
ed an entirely unwarranted feeiing
OF uncasinness when In reality =
should have given ample rc-assur-
ance II correctly Interpreted Air
Taft's attitude toward monopoly is
unchanged He recognizes. as does
any thoughtful observer, that the
drift toward monopoly n AGAINST
public welfare and has brought us
closer to Industrial revolution AND
socialism than any othcr known
force tfe, therefore wisely insists
upon performing his duty in cniorc-
ing the law fIe objects u amy re-
vision of the sherman law because
the Supreme Court has already built
up series Of Interpretations which
make the law In its application well
understood Revision ne believes
would simply revive agitatiop ARD
VsOUGUlN @Nh l9ANI ~ W. KISS
lent work and thought ALREADY eN
pended upon tho subject By tte Se
preme Court The decision IS n0y
bcing enforced in the light Ell rea
son" at.d revision he thinks "
wholly unnecessary and could ac,
ccmplish nothing except further iu-
furious disturbance of business ~
fairs. Mr. Taft also very properly
argues against the proposal that The
Supreme Court should decide be-
tween good and had trusts, GA Inn
posing improper work upon tht
court, the inference being that
trade monopolies when good would
be allowed to live; only the had be-
ing sent to perdition
Future Is Uncertain.
The future course OF the market
Is uncertain Liquidation may car.
ry prices still further, but it is quite
certain that as soon as completed, q
sharp upward reaction VIII follow
We can only repeat or previous adj
vice of exercising much discrimina-
tion in purchases Several very
poor railroad statements were issued
during the week and not unlikely
some of the indnstrials viii soon
show the consequences Of trade re
action, leaving the maintenance OF
dividends somewhat in question.
The future of United States Steel
and other big corporations is an i'm
portant uncertainty
HENRY CLEWs.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
Dustiess Carpet Sweeplnu

To give my carpets thorough
sweeping without raising dust. dip
my broom into gasoline (merely
moistening IT. and sweep In the us
ual way. This is superior to the ordi.
nary way of using wet salt or corn
meal, the gasoline Frightening the
carpets as we'll as absorbing the dust.
For my stair carpet. use q small
whisk broom, moistened with gaso-
line, and sweep the dirt onto q dust.
pan.--Suburban Life.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
FALSE BOTTOMS FOR RANGES
Economics Summer Coal consump.
tion in Simple and Effective
Manner.

Here is an invention which viii APP
PEAL TO housewives from two import
ant standpolnts, viz, economy OF coal
ana reduced temperature for summer
cooking The woman who thought
cut this idea could not see why she
should load her kitchen range up with
coal every time she wished to prepare
a meal aud then have half Of the coal
left TO burn out as waste and heat
the house 70 an uncomfortable degree.
Since, however, the live Goals must
be kept IN proximity to the griddles.
q thin fire in the deep firebox would
not accomplish the purpose. There
lore che developed the false bottom,
shown in our illustration. AS will be
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
preparlnu Mushrooms

Fry quarter Of pound OF mush.
room caps IN three tabIespoonfuls Of
hot butter, season with salt, pepper
and a CRATE of nutmeg; add half a
cupful Of milk. cover and let simmer
for eight minutes. Arrange the mush.
rooms on round Of bread In a mush-
room dish, pour the liquid over them,
cover with glass bell. and bake
about thirty minutes in moderate
oven Send to the table without re-
moving the glass, which confines the
delicate flavor and the aroma of the
mushroom.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
Foley's Kidney Remedy (Liauidl

Is "A great medicine Of proven value
for both acute and chronic kidney
and bladder ailments and for annoy
ing urinary Irregularities, 1t IS es-
peciaIly recommended TO elderly peo-
pie for its wonderful tonic and re-
constructive qualities, and the per-
manent relief and comfort 1t gives
them H. Mcconnell lit Catherine
St, Elmira, N r.. says: Five bot
ties did the work for me most effec-
lively aud beyond doubt Foley's Kid
ney Remedy is the most reliable Kid
ney medicine ever made
For sale by all druggists,
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
More Profitable.

Miss Rocksey-But. Papa, George
is Woodworking yong man.
Old Rocksey-That's It exactly. The
man / wish you to marry must be
able to make money without work
Ing
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
t.Sk.

"Reu cnlter coy said the man
who had inst been reading his son 4
severe lecture th gall men are ere.
ated equal"
"Mebbe they are" the youngster re-.
piled. but s0na Of them have the
luck to be adopted by people who re.
member that they were young onca
themselves
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
In Glorious Itaiy.

It has been observed that In italy
the memory docs NOR, tran the eye.
Scarcely stone is turned up that has
not some historical association. an.
cient or modern, that may not BE- said
to have gold under II.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
An Interesting Program.

you think that the question Of the
cost OF living can be solved by cheap
sugar."
Entirely" replied the elaborate
logician Cheap sugar will promote
the use of confectionery untll every
body's teeth are ruined, and then We
will all be forced to eat the simplest
foods
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25

WANTED--Men to learn the best
business in the world, the barber
trade Can have your own shop or
earn big wages. Few weeks re-
quired Tools given; wages while
learning Write Moler Barber
College, st Louis, Mo,
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
Riaht Never All on One Side.

Scarcely any private quar-e! eve
happens In WHICH the right and wrong
ars so exQuisitely divided that all the
right Ii on one side and all the wrong
on the other --Macaulay.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
DoDGING THE FRYING PRESS
How the President and Cabinet Fool
tho Newspaper Correspondents
In Washington.

When the cabinet holds meeting
one Of the things that causes invari-
able concern is What shall we tell
the correspondence"
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
The JOY Rider.

His father laid the foundation OF 0
fortune by burning midnight oil"
Yes. and he is wasting 1t by ex
ploding midnight gasoline
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
His Weakness,

know gentle yeggman
Who wouldn't hurt a fly.
But he would steal most anything
Whose owner wasn't hy, 4. ,.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
WANTED.

GOOD agent wanted in every
town to represent an old established
life insurance company that makes a
specially Of temperance risks; low
rates and liberal contract to capable
man. Address S. WILSON, Secre-
tary, 253 Broadway, New York.
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25

WANTED Ugh desk, about sew
en- feet long. Address Desk" The
Bulletin,
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
MISCELLANEOUS WANTS.
MAIE--HEL2

WANTED Men, young or old,
willing to learn and capable of
quick promotion, Apply 1l06 Wash
ington avenue
The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1911-09-25
FOR SALE.

FOR SALE--Desrable cottage
home, six rooms and BATH electric
lights, gas. Corner Center and Hol-
brook avenue. Inquire 73S Center
street. or J. c. Werner, 500 Ohio
street.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1911-06-02

Poor Gov. Noel! The Varda-
man club at Brookhaven has pass
ed resolutions denouncing him for
stealing Vardaman's vouchers,
when Vardaman swore before the
Contingent Fund Committee that
he didn't receive any vouchers.
Gov. Noel should be ashamed of
himself for stealing something that
never existed. Really isn't this
about as erich" as Bilbo's re-
ceiving from Dulaney certain bills
that had never even been put in
circulation by the Government un-
til a month or so after the alleged
occurrence.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1911-06-02
CONVENED IN COLUMBUS
Tombigbee River Improvement Con-
vention

A large delegation numbering about
forty from Macon and Noxubee county
went up to Columbus Tuesday morning
and attended the convention called by
the Tombigbee River Improvement AS
ISOLATION The owners of automobiles
in the town and country each carried
up a full quota of delegates. Those at
tending from this county were:
Mayor Jas. G. Horton, Hon. lack
Landrum honorary member of Macon
delegation) Harden Brooks. Jr., E. G..
Scales, Henry Minor. Henry Owens, C.
B. Dorroh, Ed. Hardin, DR.. G. B. Gle
ment, D. c. Ferris, George Wade, E.
V. Yates. w. M. Lamberson, j. F.
Shelton, J. F. Ames, H. N. Scales, A.
D. BiniOn, w. w. Shannon. Loyl Shan
non, L. F. Holberg, C.. I. Sargent,
Geo. Richardson, w. L. Sherrod, w. T.
Connor, Wyatt Jones. Jr., S. M. Har-
L. Sutton, z. T. Dorroh, A. P. McCas-
kill, A T, Dent. DR.. E. M. Murphey,
A. G. FAINT, Mrs. A. C. FAINT.
Noxubee Countrywide Swami, G. T.
Heard, DR.. Lusk, VIM. McGhee, Lee
Windham, Walter Windham, j. B. Bin
ion, Preston Chappell, Earle Skinner.
Noxubee had the largest delegation
of any county there in either Alabama
or Mississippi, except, of course.
Lowndes county. They were met upon
| arrival by Hon. lack Landrum, who
showed them especial courtesy. In
fact, it seemed that everybody was es-
p~ecially nice to the Noxubeeans Hon.
Harden Brooks, Jr., was asked to take
the place assigned originally to Gov.
Noel and accepted the honor and ac-
quilted himself splendidly. His speech
called forth the remark that the o n
~vention was glad the governor did not
come.
Mayor Horton was put on the COM
mittee on Permanent Organization.
Hon. A. T. Dent was made chairman
of the committee on Credentials. Mr..
]. @. Poindexter and DR.. G. B. Glenn
ents were called upon and made short
speeches before the convention.
Great enthusiasm, coupled with per-
s~istent, systemized and intelligent eff
fort characterized the meeting. The
time is ripe to get congressional actor
favorable to this project. and the i'm
provement of the Tomhigbee is a pro.
ject important enough to command at
tention and feasible enough to merit
favorable action. The making of il
into a continually navigable river at al
seasons from Aberdeen to Mobile
would bring tremendous benefits to &
very large section of the country
Every one living within say forty miles
of the stream would share in the ben
eft. and thus Noxubee county would b.
materially affected.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1911-06-02
In Honor Of Bride Elect.

On Thursday afternoon, May Is,
Miss Daisy Pruitt was the charming
and gracious hostess of a linen and hose
shower given in honor of the bride
elect, Miss Mildred Minor.
After the assembling of about eighty
guests on the lawn, they were ushered
into the hall to the strains of sweet
music, rendered by Macon's youngest
and most talented musician, Creighton
Allen, where beautiful little maidens
furnished each guest with a cup of de-
lightful punch before entering the par
lor, which was beautifully decorated
with hearts, ferns and flowers. Be-
meath the electolier was suspended a
ribbon rod on which many and varied
colored silk hose were hung, end here
the bride-elect, accompanied by Misses
Pruitt, Lucus and Ames, stood and
vas showered with hose. Then Mrs
Julian Boggess delivered a gracious
toast to the bride-eleCt, to which she
blushingly replied in heartfelt lines.
The guests then drank to the health of
the bride and groom-elect.
Immediately following this, another
pleasant surprise came heralded by
tinkling of silver bells in the way Of
an express wagon drawn by two beau
tiful little girls, Beryl and Rosa Lee
FAINT. This wagon was filled to over
flowing with dainty beribboned pack
ages containing and beauti-
full linens, both for personal and house
hold adornment. The hostess then led
the bride-elect away, ~showering her
with rice from the good luck slipper as
she passed through the door,
A game of progressive cupids was
enjoyed on the lawn and followed with
dainty refreshments. The honoree was
presented with a lovely Irish crockett
center piece, while Miss Carrie Lee
Sherrod was the fortunate winner of
a dainty hand embroidered bag.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1911-06-02

Some of the majors friends are
offering as an excuse for his not
meeting either of his opponents in
debate, that Senator Carmack, of
Tennessee, lost his life as the re-
suit Of the series of debates be-
tween him and Gov. Patterson.
This is absolutely untrue, how
ever, because the killing of Mr..
Carmack was the result of certain
editorials which he had written in
the Tennessean nearly six months
after the last debate was held with
Gov. Patterson and consisted of
sarcastic references to Col. Dun
can B. Cooper and the part that
gentleman played in the reconcil-
iation between Gov. Patterson and
former Governor John I. Cox, who
had once been the bitterest politi-
cal enemies. Evidently Major
Vardaman did not consider the
debate between Patterson and Car
mack as the cause of the unfor-
tunate tragedy which resulted in
the latter'S death. because in an
editorial in the Issue published
shortly after that occurrence, the
major gave an entirely different
reason for it. In fact, it was not
the result of meeting an opponent
face to face on the stump that was
the cause of Mr.. Carmack's IN.
timely death, a think MI. Car
mack was entirely too brave a.
man to have refused to do, but it
was the result of his indulging in
personalities in his newspaper, the
very thing that Major Vardaman
is now doing in the bitterest man
ner possible.