davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
No Luck.

81 never do have any such luck az
the other boysl" complained young
Harold.
why, I am surprised" answered
his mother. You have roller skates,
a bicycle. a football suit. and "A ticket
to the gymnasium. Some boys would
think themselves very lucky II they
had those things"
Yes, but Willie Swaddling's house
burned down, and he helped to save
thingsl Tom Anderson's house was
robbed and he heard the burglar!
And Jack Turner is sick. and the
neighbors are carrying ice cream and
stuff to him"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
The Quaker Scored. 1.

An old Quaker went into a booksell-
er's shop, and an impertinent shopman.
wishing to have some sport at his ex-
pense, said to him:
You are from the country, are You
not?"
Yes" replied the Quaker.
Then here is just the thing for
you" responded the man, holding out
the book.
What Is it?" asked the Quaker.
1T is an Essay on Rearing
Donkeys.'"
Friend" said the Quaker. thee had
better present that to thy mother"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Unpaid Genius of Theodor Schwann
BY M. A. LANE, sc. B.,
arch Fellow in Physiology, University of Illinois)

one day 1t "just flashed" upon Schwann
that the animal body might be built
upon a similar plan. Investigation
proved that he was right. and the great
cell theory" was announced-not so
much theory as c fact, and one of
the simplest and most natural facts In
the world when understood even su-
perficially, the only way in which SCI
ence, after the lapse of IS years. has
been able to master its causes
Schwann was poor boy who worked
his way through school with little help
from his father. He became the pupil
of the father of modern physiology"
Johannes Mueller, and for seven years
the very years during which he made
every one of his great discoveries-he
was employed as caretaker of the
museum at the University of Berlin.
At IS, when he published the anounce-
ment of his cell theory. he still held
the same job and was earning the
same pay he had received from the
beginnIng-$7 per month!
In those years-at the magnificent
salary of an office boy-often in want
of square meal. never with a decent
Schwann dug from the rich soil of ma
ture certain grand nuggets of knowl-
edge. of which everybody has heard
while the name of the digger is scarce
| ly known popularly, even to the vast
majority Of medical doctors.
| 1t was Schwann who discovered the
gastric ferment pepsin. and gave it its
| name. Schwann was the first to show
| that life could not come into being ex
cept through the agency of pre-exist
ing living bodies. To Schwann's ori
ginal work the famed Pasteur owes al
his immortality; and were it not fol
Schwann's discovery Of the minute
structure of the animal body there
| had been no modern medicine.
/ The poor German boy become the
most honored man In Europe King!
gave him decorations, every learned
society placed him on its roll Of mem
bers, and~at 20 he was nominated pro
fessor of anatomy at the University o
Louvain. and later at Liege. where h,
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
NOT 4 NFULL-LENoTH" PAPA
Child Wanted Original Of Portrait Thas
Had Been Made % Familiar
20 Her.

An amusing incident II related of
a young service matron who had re-
linquished her husband for two years
and who. having before his departure
insisted on a good photograph. applied
herself assiduously to the upbringing
Of her two-year-old baby with a view
to the child's familiarity with her dis
tinguished father Each day she would
call the baby girl TO her and. kneeling
beside her. would hold up the photo
graph. pointing out each feature TO
the child.
One day the o1icer came home, and
the baby girl, then four years old.
was summoned. Come, DEAR" said
the mother In glee. papa has come
home at last" The child surveyed
the oficer in perplexity and finally
shook her head.
What is the matter. dear?" asked
her mother. Well" replied the child.
he looks something like my papa. but
my papa hasn't any legs!"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Charles III. Wilson of Troy. n. Y.
occupies the unique position of having
been In business In one building for IL
years: at least he will have completed
Il years In the shoe business at 242-
244 River street August IL next. This
record. 1t is believed, can be equaled
by few If any shoe retailers in this
country. Mr.. Wilson has also been in
business for himself for more than 80
years. Mr.. Wilson is today just as
much in active business as he was al
most three-quarters of a century ago,
when as a thirteen-year-old lad he en-
tered the employ OF John Leonard
Williams of Troy. To be exact. that
was August IL. 1s40. Mr.. Williams
kept a shoe store at 242-244 River
street in a building which had been
erected in 1903, and so the building
now occupied by Mr.. Wilson for his
retail shoe business is one of the old
est buildings in Troy.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
How Nome Got His Name

was for some months rushed night
and day.
Now, 1t fell to my lot to draught
q map of the Alaskan coast that runs
southeast from Behring Strait. This
map was to be made from the field
notes and plats sent by the surveying
party in that district Such notes and
plats always contained the names Of
prominent features in the way Of
mountains. capes. inlets, and SUCH
Now. In making the tracing of the
coast down from Behring Strait. I
came across . headland for which
neither notes nor plats furnished .
name. Accordingly l made . pencil
note at the point. putting the word
name! with an interrogation after It.
meaning for the Chief. when he edited
the map. to put In the name. II 1t had
one. or to think up ono II II hadn't
In the hurry Of the work. and due also
Of the fact, I presume. that I had
written the letter = In the word
name very much like IN o. The nat
Ter vas passed ~ he rsvisers ant
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Ihinnest Man Weds.

The thinnest man in the world was
married recently by Municipal Judge
John r. Newcomer at the city hall.
II had to look three times to see
him." said the Judge.
The man is Arthur Atherton, twenty
four years old. Though five feet high
he weighs only thirty-eight pounds
He married Blanche Buckley, nineteen
years old. who weighs 1876 pounds
Chicago Daily News.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Honora More Than Even.

Mrs Patrick Campbell is not kindly
inclined to criticism of her work. At
a rehearsal Of a new play, one morn
Ing, her manager, Charles Frohman.
stopped Mrs. Campbell and said: Mrs.
Campbell, 1t seems to me that those
lines should be delivered thus" repeat
ing the lines in question Mrs Camp
bell drew herself up and said: Mr..
Frohman, am an artist" That is all
right, Mrs. Campbell" replied the ur-
bane manager. Il assure you l Will
never reveal your secret"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

william" said Mrs. Peckem, stern
ly, did you ever stop to think that
some one might steal me when you
are away?"
Well" responded the poor husband,
with far away look, Il was little
alarmed when a horse thief was prowl.
ing these parts last week"
Mrs. Peckem stiffened up haughtily.
"A horse thief, eh?"
Yes. ! heard that he carried on
two or three nags from this district" "
And then Peckem made a bee-line for
the door.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

It's well enough to devote a lot or
time and a good deal of prize money
10 the composition of National an
them. but what's the matter with Civ
ing us a national wedding march, too?
Must we be forever indebted to the
marches of an erratic Bavarian and
visionary Deutscher?
Here's an opportunity for ambitious
native composers.
Think of the pride that would fol-
low such an announcement as this;
The happy pair passed down the
aisle TO the pulsating strains of Boil
var p Gibson's exquisite 'Marche
SsuptiaIet' Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Makfna IL leoal.

I'VE don't know what to do about
Piute Pete" said the Crimson Gulch
citizen. He was a real good feller
but he would be careless about shoot
in up the populace."
Did you straighten out the mat
teri"
ITO some extent; We elected him
sheriff. thereby maxim it look a little
more legal"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
~Boy Scout" Movement Spreads.

The boy scouts" movement has
reached the Malay peninsula. and
Singapore is to have a fine organiza-
tion under the patronage of the gov
ernor and chief justice. 1t is a good
thing in many ways. aside from the
military training. and bids fair to
become one Of the permanent and
most popular institutions of the penin-
aula. All through the British colonies
boy scout" organizations are being
formed
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Gray Matter.

II used to think / could hire all the
brains wanted for s25 week" Mr..
Pushem said
We'll, couldn't your
/. "Yes. But it wasn't long before l
had to call in a 100000 lawyer TO
straighten out the kinks they put into
my affairs"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Work for Extinction OF tuberculosis

Work for Extinction OF tuberculosis.
Exhibitions showing in graphic form
the prevention of consumption have
been shown in every state in the
United States. except Nevada, Arizona,
New Mexico and Wyoming, and also
In most of the Canadian provinces and
in Mexico, Porto Rico and Cuba, ac-
cording to a statement made by the
National Association for the Study
and Prevention of tuberculosis. There
are now 25 states and 16 cities hav-
ing permanent and travelling exhibits
besides the two operated by the Ma
3tfonal association itself. and the total
humber of similar displays is over
700, including about $50 small school
khibits. The first tuberculosis ex-
6ft IN america was shown by the
Maryland tuberculosis commission in
anuary, 1904. In 1906 there were
-four such exhibits.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Sunplv.

New Minister-Now just one thing
more before | accept this charge. Have
you got a supply"
Deacon-Well, yes, though we never
said anything to the last preacher
about it. I'll show you where il is,
and get you a key. but tell you you'll
have to be just as careful about using
II as the rest of usi-Puck.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
my map sent to the engravers in that

my map sent to the engravers In that
shape.
"A few weeks after was astonish1
ed, on looking over a stack of mapS
just engraved from my original to see
this particular headland designated
thereon as Cape Nome" When
shortly after gold was discovered "a
the vicinity and a camp established
there the town took the name of the
cape. and il called Nome to this
day"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
DIsFIGURED WITH cRUsTs

Some time ago / was taken with
eczema from the top of my head to
my waist. 1t began with scales on my
body. 1 suffered untold itching and
burning. and could not sleep. l was
greatly disfigured with scales and
crusts. My ears looked as IL they had
been most cut OF with a razor, and
my neck was perfectly raw. l suffered
untold agony and pain. I tried two
doctors who said / had eczema In its
fullest stage. and that 1t could not
be cured. 1 then tried other rem
edies to no avail At last, / tried a set
of the genuine Cuticura Remedies,
which cured me of eczema when all
else had failed, therefore / cannot
praise them too highly.
''I suffered with eczema about ten
months, but am now entirely cured,
and / believe Cuticura Remedies are
the best skin cure there is" (Signed)
Miss Matte j. Shaffer r. F. d. /, Box
3. Dancy, Miss, Oct. p, 1910.
Il had suffered from eczema about
four years when boils began to break
out on different parts of my body. II
started with a fine red rash. My
back was affected first, when IL also
spread over my face. The itching was
almost unbearable at times. | tried
different soaps and salves. but nothing
seemed to help me until | began TO
use the Cuticura Soap and Ointment.
One box of them cured me entirely.
recommended them to my sister for
her baby who was troubled with tooth
eczema, and they completely cured her
baby" tSigned) Mrs. F. l.. Marber-
ger, Drehersville, Pa. Sept. 6. 1910.
Although Cuticura Soap and Oint-
ment are sold everywhere. a sample
OF each, with 32-page book, will be
mailed free on application to "Cuti-
cura," Dept. L. Boston.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
SPUR Farm Lands

covering 673 square miles. now being
subdivided and sold in quarter sec.
tions and upwards direct from tho
owners-no selling commission 10
load tho price-s12 TO s1s per ncre,
one-flfth down. balance +, 2. 3, 4, 3 and
years. Wonderful cotton country
No boil weevil. Healthy climate.
schools. churches. railroad through
lands. Lands being rapidly occupied.
For free illustrated pamphlet address
-Chas. A. Jones. Manager for 8. NJ.
swenson a. Sons, Spur. Dickens
County. Texas.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

A ST. Louis man Is suing widow
for 100000 for refusing to marry
him. He must be one Of those iron.
gray whiskered men who want to slt
on the front porch OF house that was
built with money earned by another
man.-HousfOn Post
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

George Ade, at the recent Lambs
Gambol in New York, objected to the
extravaganza of the modern wife.
1T is true that the married men OF
today" he ended, have better halves,
but bachelors have better quarters"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
a BUNCH OF
rIOUNLAIN SHEEP

There Is plenty of summer range d
In the great meadow and valleys q
the park. but the snow is too dee
for them to stay all winter, SO the
must come down to the lower country
Several large bands of domestic sheer
have been grazed up to the very
boundary of the park, although tha
supervisor of the Forest Reserve hs
promised to keep the sheep back fv(
miles from the park line, but he failed
to do 1t. This drives the elk down ths|
Yellowstone Valley. In the last thred
years great herds of elk have swept
down this valley, tearing down fences|
eating up the ranchers' hay stacks
and In fact eating everything in the
line of feed. making the country lool
as il bunch of Kansas grasshopperd
had suddenly swept down the countryl
This winter G91O-1D the elk are
twenty-five miles down in the ranch
country. 1t is needless to say they
won't all of them get to see the beauz
tfful scenery Of the great Yellowstone
Park again.
The superintendent of the Yellow.
stone park and chief scout, Mr.. Nc.
Bride, are taking good care of the
park antelope, mountain sheep, deer
and a small part of the elk. 1t is I'M
possible to feed $4,000 elk, which isl
the number in the park, according to|
the last census.
About 100 tons of hay are fed to the
game every year. This is put up by.
the government. 1t is alfalfa hay am
is grown In the park on an S0-a4
fiat in front of the town of Gardiner
There are from 400 to 2 1000 elk fed
on the fiat The number varies as
there is no fence to retain the animals
and the game comes and goes at will
II the storm is severe the fiat is GOV.
cred with game; when the weather is
mild the feed ground is clear of game.
The antelope that are fed number
about 200. The other 200 go down the
river, which is their natural range.
The scouts and soldiers try to drive
them back. but it is a difficult task.
The prettiest sight of all is to see
the so mountain sheep around the
feed racks in the Gardiner Canon.
Anyone who has spent all day climb
ing to the top of some high mountain,
thinking he has been very careful to
keep under cover and out of sight of
a band of mountain sheep, to find the,
quarry has disappeared, knows hoyf
wary the big horn is. But it is d.
ferent here. The big 16-inch r.
which is so hard to get close to- :.
tSS.s Ga Ssz1 l2-a4sxszs .s.sIs l.>s~On
near enough to get a good picture
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
The Retorf Courfeoua.

Manager-You prima donnas want
SO much for your services.
Prima Donna-And you managers
want our services for a song.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Bears the
Mise

Bobby, didn't you hear mamma
tellin' us to come in out o the rain?"
Yep, but I'm not goin' to do 1T till
I'm so wet that she can't lay me
across her lap 'thout spoilin' her
dress"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Gracious, what is all that Grape
for?"
gain, and. you know. my husband goes
in for fiying!"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Those who believe In reincarnatior
would probably object to being called
has-beens.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Lots of people who are thoroughly
convinced that we shall know each
other in heaven succeed admirably In
forgetting each other here.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

girl gets so good looking every
time she peeps in mirror it's queer
IL doesn't last long enough afterward
for other people TO see.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

1t is a severe test of mans Chris
tianity 70 have the minister call on
him during business hours
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Indefinite.

Ibid you have fun taking his candy
away from the baby?"
Fun? My dear boy, 1t was q
scream."
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Many a man who has no music in
his soul can play on . woman's heart
strings.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Many q man enjoys having his
aife's relatives visit them so he can
be detained downtown till midnight
on business.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

The worst thing about the silver
lining theory II ehat you have to turn
the cloud inside ont to find II.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
He Thought So.

Eve-Am I a well dressed woman?
ADAM guess SO; you never wear
a fig leaf more than once.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

When = fellow removes the cigarn
from his waistcoat pocket before en-
bracing her she may be justified In
her suspicion that she isn't the only
girl he has ever kissed.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Some people are like the humble
toad who. when he does lose his tenn
per. gets hopping mad.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Aeroplanes may become as danger
GUS to look at as they are to fly in.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

The difhculty Of moving what not
70 cay Il knowing when not 70 say II
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Arrs. wfnnow.s sootnfng Syrup for Children
teethine softens the gums. reduces infiamma-
fion nllays pain. cures wind collie 25c . bottle.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
Disappointed.

KnicKer-Was Subbubs disappoint-
ed In his house?
Bocker-Yes; what he took to be
the henhouse turned out to be the
bungalow.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
impossible

George acts like fool"
NO. An actor could never come as
close to nature as that"-Variety Life.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

For a trainwrecker no punishment
can be too severe.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

the homeseeking farmer will have the
time to personally investigate. lie
cannot afford TO pass tho great. solid
opportunity offered 20 secure a home
I'm the fertile
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

There isn't much hope for the fel-
low who is too lazy to even go fishing.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

all the men who are leading double
lives could be found out.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
In the ONCE

II am afaid to hear that report"
why so?"
1T is likely to mean some firing
going on"
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
TO DRIVE OUT MALARIA

Take the Old Standard GROvHs TAsTELBss
CHILL Tonic. You know What you are taking
Inc formul. 4. pIainy Rru.sa On pIo EYER, eo,sls
less form. The ouinirs drives out the malaria
and the IRON builds up the system Bold by al
Asalsrs for ~ years Price 20 cents.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Many a man who is lioniZed really
has the soul Of rabbit.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

SHAKE INTO YOUR SHOES
AuRnS Foot Ease, the Anfseptic powder for TIRED,
oehing. swollen, nervous feet Gives rest and
eoRf0rt- Makes Walking delight. Sold everywhere.
-. Dunr accept any substitute. For FREE
onupls. address Allen q Olmaed. L. Roy. ny
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

Black looks are wasted on people
no are color blind.
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

De Auber-Yes. Tve Just finished
ehat painting. Do you like the per-
spective?
Oryille Blunt-Yes. it's great. The
further away you stand from It the
better 1t looks!
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

important TO Mothere
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that 1t
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04

||
/; ] !: !. : !. !. !; ! !:
n the past five years
the elk in the section
~ n of the Montana game
/TkI 22l fields north of the
N>l boundary of the Vel
Me- E1A lowstone Park have
~ greatly increased In
L numbers. 1t has been
I~ observed by many OF
tne hunters in recent years that a
larger number of cows have two
caves following them than in pre-
sious years The elk are becoming
ecciimated to the high mountainous
country of the park and upper Yellow
stone and are growing more hearty
In their present environment. In
early Gays before the great valleys
and low lands were taken up by the
settler the elk were found in the big
open country except in late summer
months, where they were very often
round In the high mountains grazing
upon great plateaus. Early explorers
and prospectors noted very few elk in
the park and section north OF that re-
serve, and in fact very little game ex-
cept buffalo This information was
ootalned from DIR. Reagr, who was
with DR.. Hayden In his official expedi-
uon In 1871. when most of the geysers
were named and angulated.
The elk stay up here in the moun-
tains all winter now, very few of their
NUMBER trying to do Gown the valley.
ihey nave learned to like the snow.
and during the first snow storms will
ieaVe the low country where the
ground is bare to climb upon the
piateaus and benches into a foot of
snow 1t is not uncommon to see a
band of elk making a trail through
TOUR feet of snow, taking turn about
breaking trail. They will live all win
ter In this deep snow and will paw
out great patches. banking the snow
up around them and making 1t look as
though they We're penned I'D In n big
corral with a great white fence
around 1t. They are fine rustlers and
are busy most of their time paving
the snow down trying to find a bunch
of grass.
The calves suffer the most from the
long, cold winter and lack of feed. due
to the deep SHOWS. but there is not a
very large percentage that die, prob
ably about 10 per cent.
They usually meet their fate in
March. which is the month the COW
starts to wean her calf, which at that
time is very weak and thin and in bad
condition to rustic for itself.
The large herds of ep- st-.-ts to
leave the high mountain meadows OF
the Yellowstone Park, where the snow
The Aberdeen weekly., 1911-08-04
HOW IT HAPPENED.

Tom-Was II case of love at first
sight?
Harry-No-first call. She was
telephone girl, and he was taken with
her voice when he first heard IL.
The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1911-06-09
SEIpP-LOY.

Fred Seipp, Galilee, and Miss Mar
garet &. 10y, Rutledgedale, were
married at Honesdale, June Z, Rev.
A. c. Oliver officiating. They have
planned for short tour to a few
points of interest including the Della
ware Water Gap before settling in
their pleasant rural home near Ty-
Ter Hill. Miss 10y is a daughter of
William and Mary Loy Rutledgedale,
who have for many years been active
in the social and religious life of the
community. She is a graduate of the
Damascus High school and has
taught very successfully several
terms of school. She is a member of
the Methodist Episcopal church and
a teacher in the Sunday school. Mr..
Se1pp is a young man who has the
confidence of the people in business
and social life, is also active in re-
ligious work being the much appre-
ciated superintendent of the Sunday
school at Galilee and member of the
ofilcal board of the NJ. E. church. A
bright future opens before them and
their many friends unite in wishing
for them continued success and hap
piness.
They were attended by Miss Verna
NJ Rutledge and William w. 10y, a
brother of the bride.