Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1911-11-05
WHY LUcULLUS LEFT HONE

WIZ G0HpGGNS 49, ''N"-
sad Tale OF How BucoIic Youth
was Bured from the Long
FurrOw.
Lucullus was not handsome, but he had
q good disposition.
He never. never drank
And he was good to his folks.
He was born on the farm. He grew
up ON the farm. lie stuck to the farm.
The baleful, beckonng lights OF Broad
ways lamps turned not Lucullus. The
blithesoule. gleesful hours Of his young
life were spent in agriculture
He was industrious.
He used to rise at a. m. and don
his ovoralls. and toss the forks of frag-
rant hay into the horses stalls. Quickly
a half peck OF oats before each steed he'd
set, and with a brush and currycomb per-
form it's toilet. He'd coax the milk from
eleven cows and strain It into pals, next
his gay voice a-calling hogs would echo
! through the wales. Then he would chop
cord OF wood and stack IL by the doors
he didn't have to feed the hens, for that
was his fathers chore. Deep in the brim-
ming pail he'd plunge his features calm,
pull up HIS chair and eat his fill OF
huminy and ham. At break OF day he
would set out and till the soil till nighff5
and then he'd put the stock 10 bed by
the trusty lanterns light. For supper he
would have a change as you can plainly
see. he'd have ham and hominy.
! After supper he could go to bed, IL he
felt like it,
| Usually he'd feel like it,
For five long, lazy hours he would do
nothing but sleep.
Fie on thee, Lucullus. fear thou art q
sluggard.
He was economical.
Other young blades might run about
to picnics and waste their substance in
/ riotous absorption of lemonade and pink
soda pop, but not our hero; for him, tho
peanut rooster shrieked In vain. The
clarion call of the tamale vender fell upon
| deaf ears.
And SO.
When he was 10 years old he had Sc
in the bank.
His own money.
He might have drawn it out and spent
| it had he wished.
But it was safe.
He was educated. }
He could write his name quite well and
read most any book printed in words of
one syllable.
| knowledge is power,
! But IL is also peril: It ruined Lucullus.
o. that he had never learned to write his
! name.
o. that he had never learned to read I'm
words of one syllable.
A drummer passed; he handed Luculius
a book; the book was filled with pictures,
fierce-looSing fellows. stripped for the
fray. Some were pirates" some giants
ONE wild bunch called themselves
Tigers" Lucilus read the book; he gazed
long upon the pictures, and he was a
changed man. He carried the book to-
| work; he slept with IL under his pilioA
| His parents saw the change and grieEed
for his blowing average had fallen off
| 1000 to 1898 and a fraction One night while
| the tired hero slept his mother slipped
| the book from meath his head. She handed
it TO father. Father gave one look and
cast 1t from him with a bitter moan. 1t
was Spalding's base bali manual and
guide.
| Then came the crisis.
One morning father knocked at Luoullus'
door in vain.
He was gone.
So was his other pants.
So was the $2s from the bank.
| All gone.
He had hired out to a bush league
manager for $40 a month and found sss
He was resolved to become q great
pitcher
He had not praoticed much with a base
ball, but he could pitch hay, pop a
squirrel out OF the top of the tallest tree
with rock and outrun any bull in dads
pasture.
He was green. but he was game. and he
had good disposition.
At first he was a scream.
He made good.
His curves were so wide they frightened
the people in the grandstand. His fAsA
ones were 80 hot they set fire to th&
tall grass. The scouts found him out, the
managers were crazy about him. He
signed up in the big league for five years
at 1900 per. then he went right out and
spent 50 of 1t for nothing but clothes.
o, you Harry Lehr.
After that he went to the dogs fast.
Now he blows more money for chevina
gum than he used to spend for socks.
He stu passes up the dope sticks ana
the booze, but the other day when a hot
inshoot caroomed off his ribs, he said
"shucks" right out loud His MANAGE
was shocked. The umpire tainted. AneNhC
despises hominy He cannot look an hon.
est pig in the face. Every time he sees q
COW he trembles and turns pale He has
been seen TO walk three blocks out OF hts
way to keep from passing a hay wagon,
But at the hotels he tips generously,
and every morning at o'clock q bell-
boy hammers on his door and calls on
him to get up and curry the horses. Then
Lucullus rolls over and with a happy
smile sinks into peaceful slumber.
/. Poor Lucullus,--Kensas City Star.