Omaha daily bee., 1911-07-29
Washington Life
Some Interesting Phases
and Conditions Observed
81 the Nations Capital
Striking ut Lame Ducks.

Striking Mt Lame Ducks.
Congressional lame ducks" snugly
quartered at the government pie counter"
are not permitted the full enjoyment Of
the feast arranged by themselves Envious
pot hunters consider them fine game and
take shot at them whenever the chance
offers. This cruel conduct is annoying al
ways and dangerous at times The seren-
lily Of the meal is disturbed, assimilation
retarded and the conversation marred by
the distant notes OF a dirge. Such sltua-
ton cannot last long. Some congressman
ana senators are determined to end It and
are making progress. Senator Cummins
resolution requiring the monetary commits
sion TO report by December next and close
up shop is regarded favorably, since Chair
man Aldrich of the commission announced
that report would be submitted at the
time Indicated. Other commissions in which
retired congressman and senators are quar-
tered at the old pay will be brought within
range OF the pot hunters at the regular
session. Meanwhile Senator Borah is load
ing piece of heavy artillery 80 aimed as
to wipe out the whole flock at one shot
He proposes to make members of congress
ineligible to any federal position within
two years after the expiration of their
terms.
Working for n Job.
There have been many amusing phases
to the appearance of the swarm of demo-
cratic petty officeseekers who flocked to
Washington when the jobs changed hands
relates Leslie's Weekly. Every man who
arrived seemed to believe he would land
the most important position. His first let
ter home confided the fact that he was
about to secure a chief clerkship Seven
days later 1t would be assistant clerk, a
week from then something even more mod
est Most likely the end OF the month
would find this same man running an ele-
vator in the house office building and glad
to get 1t. One of the best stories is of an
individual, said to be one OF Mr. Under
woods constituents, who wendell his way
to Washington from Alabama. He was a
democrat, all right and needed the money.
Finally the man landed the berth Of police
man. He looked good in his uniform, but
was green about his new duties.
What should 1 do first?" he inquired
of another older policeman.
Your first work." said the other, and
without the slightest authority, lis to get
out there and NOW that grass"
1t was 104 in the shade but the man
from Alabama went to 1t without a word.
He had the task nearly completed when
a friendly soul took pity and told him that
capitol policemen were not supposed to
keep the lawn trimmed.
"News ~ is News"
Come in and deliver any news you
have" remarked one Of the correspondents
to the house press gallery as DR.. Barch-
field, the big member from P1ttsburg
blocked the door.
You might as we'll try to rob a man
in poorhouse." exclaimed the Pennsyl-
vania member projecting his six feet and
two inches Of stature into the gallery. But
there have been things just as remarkable
as that come to pass. Which reminds me
that once upon a time-some twenty years
ago-I was standing one evening on the
river bank. back home, near the old poor
mousse Today Toe Ceraegie Homestead mill
Nbt fetth