davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
KEEP POLLING ON.

Oh, let lis still lift up our eyes
 And seek a worthy goal; The man who aye undaunted tries,
 With all his heart and soul, E 'en though he fails and low at last
 Is laid in nameless grave, s> Shall prove, howe'er by gloom o'ercast, 'Tis something to be brave. Who quits the fight, ere half begun, And poltroon-hearted, fees When victories might yet be won,
 Shall taste the bitter lees Of wild regret; and when too late
 Remorseful tears shall weep Der shattered dreams of high estate And VOWS he failed to keep.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
 A widow is always willing to learn from a man so she will need to learn more.
 The most comfortable pedigree to have is one that goes back to gold mine.
 When woman isn't losing her hair very fast, ,>its sign she is sure It's grow ing thicker and longer. '
 If it rained dollars in your back yard the bottom of 1t would drop out and they would all go through to China.
 I, woman's bank account balances the first time she tries it, she doesn't dare -erify it, for fear 1t won't again.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
Coincidence in Names

"One of the most remarkable con- cidences regarding names has Just como to my attention" said a professional man. For many years Dr.. John |. Keane has been one of the foremost Catholic prelates in America. I knew him personally well when he was made bishop of Richmond in success sion to Cardinal Gibbons who was for fours years bishop of the Richmond diocese. Just before being elected b the hierarchy pr. Keane was a pop ular preacher in Washington, D. c. From Richmond he was transferred to the Catholic university at Washing ton as rector. On resigning from the where he held the position of consulter to the congregation of theological studies. He also had the honorary title of canon of St. John Lateran. For sew eral years past he was archbishop of Dubuque, resigning on account of poor health, believe. Now here Is the CO., incidence. His. successor as archbishop of Dubuque Is pr. John J. Keane, who has been bishop of Cheyenne. The two men are not related. The retiring archbishop ranks as one of the most scholarly doctors of the Catholic | church. He is the author of all the
 Catholic articles in one of the stan dard encyclopedias.
 | He established a reputation as d
 controversialist during the short time he was bishop of Richmond when he land the late Rev. Dr. Brown, an able
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
visItor Remnrk. Great Proeres.

w. V. Custer of Bainbridge, Ga, gen. eral agent of the Guarantee Company of North America, spent yesterday in Birmingham He visits this city from time to time on business, and is all ways cordially greeted by friends here.
 Birmingham is going ahead at fast rate" said MT. Custer. My first visit was in 1900. Birmingham was a town of considerable size then, but it's bus mess district did not present an ele- gant or modern appearance. It rather struck me as being an overgrown min ing town. It is very different today.
 "The erection of the first steel frame office building-the Woodward-was a turning point. That building marked a new era in this city's growth. It was soon followed by other big office build ings, and now Birmingham's business district is handsome and decidedly mod ern. l was here last February and l can see substantial Improvements even in this short time. Birminghams resi- dence sections are notably beautiful and form splendid advertisement for this city.
 Everyone can see that Birmingham has a great future. It Is sure to be not only the south's leading industrial city, but one of the greatest manufacturing cities in the United States
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

From the Philadelphia Bulletin.
 Enthusiastic sons of Alabama already have presented the name of Congressman Oscar w. Underwood as that states fa- vorite son and presidential candidate The civil war is not as yet sufficiently distant to render such 8 nomination probable, but the fact cannot be lost to sight nor fail of consideration, even under present cir cumstances, that, were Alabama a north ern state, the suggestion would have to be reckoned with by other candidates who have hope of preferment in the next na- tional democsrtic convention.
 The action of the democratic members of the House in cheering the Alabama mittee on his reply to Bryan, the other day, has attracted much attention as in. dicating the change of sentiment toward the Nebraskan. But it is of equal signifi. canoe as a tribute to Congressman Un. derwood.
 Assuming the duties of party leader ship at the opening session of a Congress in which his party had secured a ma. jority, with prospects of obtaining full COlllIOl ol lno SONtTHt1leUl, ne ndS sue ceeded in an unexpected measure in fram. ing a series of tariff bills, which, what ever may be their points of weakness in- yitng attack, have held the democratic majority in the House together to date and, although at some cost in necessary dicker, have commanded support in the Senate from the insurgent republicans tt ctlfh ayta Lo afe +;,i record on which to appeal to the people Without discussing the result of such an appeal, it must be admitted that Chair man Underwood has earned recognition from his party, and the applause from his fellow-members of the House was not more deserved than it was representative of the general sentiment of democracy Appreciation of such leadership is not likely to end in empty applause. It may be unlikely that political strategy vii permit his formal acceptance as party leader and presidential candidate; it ma, be possible that even nomination as Vice President by the side of a northern presi dential candidate will not be considered feasible; but it cannot be imagined tha, a democratic convention should reject his leadership or disregard his counsels il the framing of platform or in the SC lection of It's candidates.
 Congressman Underwood will be a fac tor in the next democratic convention He may be the determining factor. The tariff again will be the issue in the na, tional campaign and the man who shool the hands of Bryan will have to besti, himself if he would hold the commanding position in the race which seemed to bs his few months ago. Bryan has beer defeated and his leadership discreditet before. The significance of this occasion | lies in the fact that leader, who has earned for himself the confidence of his party. is ready to take his place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
DESTINY

By T. B. Alddrich.
 Three roses, wan as moonlight, and
 weighed down,
 Each with its loveiness as with a crown, Dropped in a florists window in a town. The first a lover bought It lay at rest Like flower on flower that night on
 beauty's breast. The second rose as virginal and fair, Shrank in the tangles of an harlot's hair. The third widow, with new grief made
 wild, s- Shut ip the icy palm of her dead child.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
WONDER WHAT MADE HER DO TT,

"A very singular accident happened at the theatre last night "Yes? What was it?'
 "A beautiful girl came in wearing a. gorgeous gown" But what was singular about that?" why, she came in fully 15 minutes before it was time for the show to be- gin."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
RATHER SLIM FARE

HA HEN SIIIM FAKE.
 How WIZ de feed in de last jail you wuz in, Dusty?"
 Just so. so, me boy''
 How wuz dat?'
 "Dejeuner wuz bread an water. Repeat tree times an you have de daily menu
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
NO BUSINESS ACUMEN

ftDibble is one of the most impractical fellows I ever saw .4
 You seem to be very positive"
 "I am. Why, he wouldn't have any better sense than to start laundry in the heart of Bohemia"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Senator Cullom is about all that Is left of the old standpat crowd in the Senate, and private life is calling him, but he is troubled with deafness on that side.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
THRUST AND PARRY,

q don't like the way you delivered your lines in the last act" said the playwright.
 Perhaps you will show me how to de- lineate character" replied the star, sar- castically.
 No I merely wish you to pronounce few of your vowes in such a way that the audience will know what you are talking about-'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Gov. Woodrow Wilson has already been chosen President by the debating socie- ties and straw voters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The German universities are old-fash- toned. They confer no degrees on. uncul- tured captains of industry, no matter how big the wads are that they carry.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The big gunmakers are not shutting down because of the international arbi- tration pacts.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

MT. Taft Is planning prediction trip, but the Payne tariff will not get another Wnona Endorsement.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
DESIGNED TO DRAW.

DESIGNED TO DRAW. People in the middle western states don't seem able to get enough of the chautauqua sandwich" ~ What is the chautauqua sandwich?' Bryan at one end of the programme
 and Hobson at the other, with lot of
 small fry thrown in to fill out'' PAUL COOK
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Rotten materials and benzoate of soda SC together, and both are well en- trenched at Washington.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Play oftentimes brings fatigue, but it i. not compulsory, while work is.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The chap who sips his coffee at break fast behind a newspaper is now classed with the endseat hog.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Antf-siren ordinances are being adopt ed daily in the cities of this broad land
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

An acre In potatoes will buy an auto these days with some change left in the farmers pocket.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Mir Leishman, our new ambassador at Berlin, cannot speak German, although his ancestors could speak nothing else.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
WASTED PATHOs.

Twas at a moving-picture play
 Designed to make spectators weep; And some, methought, were wondrous gay And some, forsooth, were sound asleep.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Colonel GoethaIs will probably be asked to build the canal Notifications after he has dug the canal itself. He is good at almost anything except the coal trade.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The impression grows that a wobbly, blear-eyed panic was hoodooed by Prick and Gary and President Roosevelt pulling together over the T. c. I.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Pauline Wayne, the White House COW, is travellng, but she has too much sense to make a Winona speech anywhere.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

A policeman on the aviation squad will soon be known as a "fycop."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

and learned Presbyterian divine, had some lively tits My old friend Dr. Brown was at the time editor of the Central Presbyterian. He criticised Bishop Keane for styling himself bishop of Richmond. the Presbyterian contend ing that he was bishop only of the Catholic diocese of Richmond The bishop replied with characteristic vigor The controversy in the formNof open letters broadened out into quite wide range. including many mooted histor- ical and theological points. Both schol- ars in the controversy were gingery now and then, but they never ceased to be on friendly terms personally.
 As to the young John J. Keane, know nothing of his scholarship. He may turn out to be as able and az gressive as the older If so, he will soon make his influence felt"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The Lorimer investigation has reached it's opening stage. In other words, it is just fairly launched, and it may last a lifetime.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

A people that had become accustomed to Jeff Davis of Arkansas are now trying to accept in advance yardaman of Mis- sissippi
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

I pity any rural wight
 Who has a mule disposed to balk; Also the young newspaper light ,. Who thinks he'll get Togo to talk.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Nat Goodwins book of wives is still delayed in publication. In the meanwhile Nat Is getting a deal of free advertising.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Congress has increased the quantity of the House of Representatives and the people are expected to improve it's quail itV
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
TWO HARD PROPOSITIONS

wishin' that I might die."-cincinnati
 Times-Star.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
Pjttsburc With an "Hv

"Pittsburg people have always stickle1
 for the h at the end of the name of
 their town-Pittsburgh, instead of Pitts burg" said an old citizen who claims to
 have a sentimental attachment for the great city at the head of the Ohio river.
 "Outside of Pittsburg the h has long
 since been dropped. In newspapers and
 encyclopedias and in books generally 1t
 is spelled Pittsburg. The postoffice de-
 partment at Washington has for some
 time been a reformer in the matter of
 spelling While it is not as radical or up-
 to-date as some of the magazines whose
 ditors insist on phoneticizing familiar
 words.,i has eliminated unnecessary let
 ters, or letters deemed by the depart
 rnent superfluous. I can remember when all of our burgs were spelled with an h. and in the postmark the h was gen erally retained, according to my recollec- tion, as late as 1875. In deference to the feelings of the people of Pittsburg an ex- ception was made in favor of the Penn sylvania city and the h remained in the postmark for a time after the simplified
 rule had been adopted. But at length even P1tISDurB II Idu lO 6o. uih ioW 6io to learn that it has been restored. I have always heard that Postmaster General Hitchcock was a reasonable man. think he showed his reasonableness in acceding to the Pittsburg demand. Iconoclasts in their efforts to smash tradition and poet ic legends strike at everything that has I bit of old time sentiment connected with it.
 About 25 or 30 years ago the postoffce department ruled out c. H. standing for Court House. as the termination of cor
 tain old towns. In Virginia it used to be
 Appomattox Court House. Louisa Court
 House, and so on. When the department
 had the court house matter under. con-
 sideraton Virginia congressman and
 others protested. They insisted especial ly on leaving Appomattox Court House unchanged. But the department was stubborn and would listen to no argument based on mere sentiment. It is now sim ply Appomattox. Most of the Court House towns were in the south, but ore of the best known was in Ohio-Washing- ton Court House. And it is still Washing | ton Court House. Exception was made | in its favor because there was another Washington postoffice in Ohio and c. II. was allowed to remain as a part of the | name of the large town in order to keep | the mail straight" ..s
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
EXCUSABLE.

EXCUSABLE. He made the best of what befell, And yet, could not, to save his life; Refrain from letting out yell When he was pummeled by his wife. Nor could you blame the hapless wight For dreading those domestic rounds; His better half knew how to fight And weighed at least 200 pounds.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
OSCAR w. UNDERWOOD

Poor old Uncle Joe has been lost in the shuttle of an extra session.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

WHICH? Seeing
 The sights Includes
 Sbme tights, When "Rube'' Doth go To town,
 You know. -- Birmingham Age-Herald. Seeing The tights g6 May mean The wights Who drink; Or those On maids
 In shows.
 Youngstown Telegram.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

THE FASHIONABLE KIND. Gertrude Hoffman has pair of Egyp- tiah shoes she can hardly walk in.'' That being the case. Gertrude'se shoes must be strictly up to date"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

ss,ater this sorrow.
 Antony and Cleopatra.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
THAT'S WHY

THAT'S WHY. My lord" appeals To most of us, Because it's so Altisonous.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

The roller towel stands condemned on it's very. face. ss
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Entered at the Birmingham. Ala'' postoffice as second-class matter under act of Congress March 3, 1873.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12
TELEPHONES

Bell (private exchange connecting all departmental, No. 1900.
 PeopIes-EditOrial rooms, 231; busi- ness office, 23O.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Colonel GoethaIs will probably be asked to build the canal Notifications after ht has dug the canal itself. He is good al almost anything except the coal trade.
 
 Senator Cullom is about all that is Jeff of the old standpat crowd in the Senate and private life is calling him, but he is troubled with deafness on that side.
  The German universities are old-fash- ioned They confer no degrees on. uncul- tured captains of industry, no matter how big the wads are that they carry. The impression grows that wobbly blear-eyed panic was hoodooed by Prick and Gary and President Roosevelt pulling together over the T. c. I. The Lorimer investigation has reached it's opening stage. In other words, il is just fairly launched, and it may last lifetime.
 A people that had become accustomed | to Jeff Davis of Arkansas are now trying to accept in advance yardaman of Mis-. sissippi | Congress has increased the quantity oi the House of Representatives and the people are expected to improve it's qual. ity.
 l l Nat Coodwn's book of wives is stil 1 delayed in publication. In the meanwhile Nat is getting a deal of free advertising
  Mir. Leishman, our new ambassador al Berlin, cannot speak German, although his ancestors could speak nothing else.
  Pauline Wayne, the White House cow is travellng, but she has too much sense to make winona speech anywhere.
  Rotten materials and benzoate of soda SC together. and both are well en- trenched at Washington.
  Gov. Woodrow Wilson has already been chosen President by the debating socie- ties and straw voters.
  The chap who sips his coffee at break fast behind a newspaper is now classed with the end-seat hog.
  MT. Taft Is planning a prediction trip, bat the Payne tariff will not get another winono fndorsemap+
  An acre in potatoes will buy an auto these days with some change left in the farmers pocket, The big gunmakers are not shutting down because of the International arbi- tratlon pacts. Antf-siren ordinances are being adopt ed daily in the cities of this broad land.
  Play oftentimes brings fatigue, but 1t is not compulsory. while work is.
  A policeman on the aviation squad will soon be known as "1ycop."
  Poor old Uncle Joe has been lost in the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

Daily and Sunday Age Herald. -. $500 Daily and Sunday, per month. " Daily and sunday. three months. 200 Sunday Age Herald 200 Weekly Age-Herald. per annum.. .60
The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-08-12

z E. Morgan and T. s. Millsap are the only authorized travelling repre- sentatives of The Age-Herald in it's circulation department.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16
The Law.

Speaking of law, the late Govern
or John A, Johnson, of Minnesota
said;
There is too much partisanship
and not enough patriotism in Amer
lea. There is much wrong done
owing to disrespect for the law.
The greatest thing in the universe.
Law has been and ever will be. In
our country the law is made for the
benefit of the people-to protect
the poor, to enable the workman to
collect his wages and to maintain
him in the enjoyment of his rights
under the constitution. Disrespect
and corporations draes the respect
of the law in the dust"
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16
The Great Express Monopoly.

A writer in the March American
Magazine calls public attention to a
gigantic monopoly which for years
has escaped publicity and which
has been fattening on unheard of
profits wrung from the people by
the exercise of usurped privileges.
This monopoly is that controlled by
the great express companies, six of
whom execute so per cent of the
cOuntty'S express business. Mr.. At
wood, the author of the article.
shows that these companies by
agreements between themselves,
have never entered into competi-
ton with each other, and rates, ar
bitrarily determined, are never cut.
Mr.. Atwood wants to know why the
U. S. Post Office runs at a loss and
why the express companies have re-
peatedly declared enormous divi-
dends to their stockholders. Speak
ing of the entire lack of competi-
ton between the express compan-
les, Mr.. Atwood writes:
AT first thought there would ap.
pear to be competition among the
different companies on one occasion
at least, that is when railroad con
tract expires But unfortunately
there is competition only as to which
company will pay the railroad most
for the l,rivilege. Consequently the
bigger the payment the more the
public must be charged to enable
the express company to make the
large profits to which it is accuS-
toned. Indeed the public is better
off when there is least expiration OF
contracts, for the railroads are de-
handing more each year from the
express companies. Formerly the
railroads did not expect more than
40 per cent of the gross receipts
where the business was heavy
whereas now SIS and 81 IL per
cent. are the customary per centage
for a choice contract"
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16
Horrors of Famine Are Told.

Washington, D. c., March 8.
More erueSome stories of the hor-
rorS of the Chinese famine reached
the State Department to-day from
the Consul General at Shanghai,
who sums up conditions at the be-
ginning of February. One traveller
reported passing thirteen dead bod
les in thirteen miles on the road.
The missionaries tell of the
natives eating cakes made of leaves
and stems mixed with millet chaff
which they buy with the allowance
of the Government of 3 cents apiece.
The trees had been stripped of bark
which had been eaten.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16
This Is Christianity.

A minister at Oklahoma City, in
carrying out the true principles of
the Bible, has applied its ethics to
a thief. One day last week a young
man stole a minister's laprobe from
his buggy and the minister upon
being informed ofthe theft, pursued
and overlook him. He questioned
the young man why he took it and
he said that he was hungry and I'M
able to get work. The minister took
him to a restaurant, ordered him a
meal and told him when he had
eaten the meal to come to his study
and they would talk the matter
over. He SAID that he would and
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16
No Illusion.
He pointed with pride to his fertile

He pointed with pride to his fertile
farm,
He found it an innocent JOY;
His oarns and bins filled his breast
with a charm.
No vexation his soul did annoy.
His heart was not set on silver and
gold;
No masters lash ever caused him
sad means;
He toiled in heat and toiled in
the cold,
For he knew he must feed all
the droneS.
He knew that the greatest treasure
on earth
Consisted not in silver and gold
He knew a good name far excelled
them in worth,
If in life's book it was only en-
rolled. T. S. Inmau.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16

true to his word he appeared Now
he is at work earning all honest
living. This course would not al
ways work, but with man who
has made his first offense it is
more apt to bring good result than
the prison route. What if he had
caused this mans arrest and thrown
him into prison, he had been tried
and of course found guilty? He
would have been sentenced to pris-
on and upon finishing his sentence
would have come out friendless.
with no means of support and prob
ably turned to crime as a means of
livelihood. Under the system that
the minister pursued he will become
a better man. A few kind words
and a helping hand never 60 amiss
in this old world. Spectator.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1911-03-16

Craig Utterback one of the wide
awake and up-to-date young farm
ers out on rural route 8 transacted
business in Monroe. Friday. Craig
is figuring on putting out a big crop
this time and you can depend on
him for results.