The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1911-11-10


that gang had assembled.
Great Work by Alievistor.
| have heretofore been very modest
in my claims as to what my alleviatcr
would do, but have known right alons
that where spark Of life still re
NAMED in the human body 1t would
WOO it back. Never was there more
complete success than in this case.
Death almost at once released its
clutch. life returned like an old COW
gallopin' home at millin' time. and IN
the course Of twenty minits the man
who was being mourned and wept over
as gone coon was boxin' his wlfe's
ears and sendin' the other mourners
about their bizness.
Remember that / am the sole com
FOUNDER of this alleviator Any one
claimin' TO hev my receipt or to be
sellin' svmthin' jest as good is hoss
thief and liar.
You start in at the earache and cure
everything down to consumption. and If
human critter hasn't bin dead over
five hour. you shouldn't look at 1t as a
hopeless case.
Be Sure TO Get the Genuine.
The price is the same TO rich and
poor-25 cents. II I'm feelin' jubllant
l make 10 per cent reduction to min
listers Of the gospel If hain't I add
3 per cent on the regular price
Before buyin' this alleviator at n
drug store take every precaution TO
sntisfy yourself that the druggist is
respectable. There are thieves. vi.
ians and murderers among druggists
the same us among other classes, aud
they would not hesitate to empty out
the alleviator and refill the bottle with
castor lie.
When | left the house of mournin'
the wife gave me a look of reproach
and the husband said he'd be burned
If he would pay % cents fur bein
brung back to hard work and poor liv-
IN when he had made all arrange
ments to git out of It. And he wouldn't
certificate for publication in my fam
fly almanac.
l had not driven more than half q
mile and wasn't quite sartin In my
own mind whether virtue was its own
reward or not when the critter who
had planned to marry the widder
jumped out on me from the bushes.
He was a disappointed and angry man.
ne grabbed the old boss by the bit
and stood there and called me names
for long FIVE mlnlts.
Then he begun to inveigh agin the
allevlator. l can stand personal abuse
nI long as the next. but when critter
begins to abuse II remedy that has bin
before the public for the last twenty
five years and has saved thousands of
lives every year of that time my hair
begins TO curl.
Fight Brief and Not Deadly.
When the disapp inted man invited
me to git down and hev my head
punched | accepted. and the mint my
feet teched the ground he swarmed fur
me. Theystruggle was brief, but moi
deadly. | swung fur his jaw and
reached 1t and put him out of business,
and / did not think it my duty under
the circumstances to waste Il bottle of
alleviator in restorin' him. He was
not dead, but only sleepin'. could
hev gone through his pockets and tax
en- his cash and turned 1t over TO some
orphan asylum, but | restrained my
hand. Holdln' down Il job as pilgrim
and holdin' down one us II robber are
two different things.
AS ambled along and was drawin'
near the Weepin' IIoller before men
shuned citizen come out to bid well
come. lie was the mayor He was q
man Of oily looks and unctuous talk,
and lie wanted to make me feel to
home at once. / appreciated the hos
pltable welcome extended, but ut the
same time did not forget that jest sech
II feller once picked my pocket on
Chicago street car.
Teaches Mayor Poker.
When had assuaged my thirst with
a glass of sassyparila pop the unc-
tuOus mayor asked me II | had ever-en-
countered the game OF poker in any of
my pllgrimages. ! had to answer that
had met up with II on two occashuns.
but had only set on the hay outside
the circle and seen the others play the
game. He seemed disappointed. He
had heard of the game, he said. and
wanted to learn 1t so as to start a
spring boom in Weepin' Holler real es-
tate.
A still small voice whispered TO me
to beware. but yet l thought that so
good a man should be accommodated,
ana at last let him prevail upon me
to sit down and show him what
knew Of the game.
Providence seemed TO have me under
its wing. The mayor started off hold
in hands OF threes, straights and
hushes and raisin' my bets In a most
reckless manner, and but fur my bein'
a man of strict integrity | should have
been cleaned ont in no time As It was
was $l5 behind the game when
got straight flush together and wal. |
loped him 10 the tune OF fifty. ! may
say right here, without goin' further, |
that this money will be sent TO the |
heather OF Africa ms soon as can get
around to II. When the oily and unc-
tnous was dogu hrplyo and couId ,n,,