davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
CLAIMS THE PALM FOR
HER SHApELY FIGURE
Chicago Woman Is Said to Pos
sess Most Perfect Form In
the World.

Chicago.-Special: Oak Park offers
from its social circles a new candidate
for the title OF "the most perfectly
formed woman in the world Miss
Florence Haegg, the 17-year-old dargh-
ter Of o. w. Haegg, 1876 Elmwood Ave..
Is the candidate.
She is a fancy swimmer whose feats
are said to rival those of Annette KEEL
hermann, who holds the perfect form
championship" given her by DIR. Sar-
gent of Harvard.
Miss Haegg recently has been per-
forming her feats in the tank al the
Dab Park Y. NJ. c.. A. for the edification
of friends, and it vas these private ex-
hibitions that formed the basis for the
report that Oak Park had the only real
rival of Miss Kellermann.
Won't Go on the Stage.
Although Miss Haegg had said she
has no intention Of going on the stage,
it is possible she may submit TO DR..
Sargent her measurements in an en-
deavor to learn whether they are nearer
the ideal than any of the others sub
mitted 10 the Harvard expert.
Miss Haegg has refused to allow any
measurements to be taken, maintaining
that her athletic exercises are her own
affair. But within the last few days a
ClSCuSSlOl taken up Dy Oak EGTR WOtn-
en- caused the young mermaid to half
agree" to send the figures and ask for
a comparison.
Miss Haegg's speciality is diving, but.
while she has never attempted any div
ing from great heights, she a she
has never found any place the altitude
of which frightened her or caused her
to hesitate. Miss Haegg takes greater
pleasure in som~ersaulting backward
and forward, diving sideways and
skimming like the porpoise through a
foot and q half OF water than attending
a society function.
Miss Haegg is decidedly pretty and
has a form which she says has not suf-
fered by her physical exercise, thereby
adding another argument against the
theory of DR.. Sargent, who says gym
nastic work Is making women mascu-
line.
Swimming Favorite Stunt.
II am 5 feet 6 inches in height and
weigh 143 pounds, and I've never been
SICK" said Miss Haegg. Il have been
swimming and taking all kinds of
exercise ever since l was a child, and I
know there is nothing in this talk about
women growing masculine because they
exercise. None of my girl friends who
has taken the greatest amount of
exercise has suffered in appearance or
in nne
II love swimming, but / also take all
around exercise. / have dived into a
foot and a half of water from the high
est platform in the v. M. G. A. swim
ming pool, but that is not very high.
about 10 feet or so.
II can make two somersaults before
striking the water; dive backwards and
sideways. / am not giving any exhibit
tions, but the other girls like to watch
me do my little stunts In the swimming
tank"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Mo Siam for Her

Slip me a brace of cacklesi" or
dered the chesty-looking man with a
bored air, as he perched on the first
stool in the iunchroom.
"A what?" asked the waitress. as
she placed a glass Of water before
him.
Adam and Eve fat on their backsI
A pair of sunnysidersi" said the young
man in IN exasperated tone.
"You got me, kid" returned the
waitress. "Watcha want?"
Eggs up" said the young man.
Eggs the kind that come before
the hen or after, I never knew which"
why didn't you say SO in the first
placer" asked the waitress. You'd a
had 'em by this time"
Well, Of ell things- said the
young man.
II knew what he was drivin' at all
the time" began the waitress as the
young man departed. But he's one
of them fellers that thinks they can
get by with anything. He don't know
that they're using plain English now
In restaurants"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
ExaaeeratIon.

On her arrival In New York Nine.
Sara Bernhard, replying to a compli-
ment on her youthful appearance,
said: Tho secret of my YOUTH It
is the good God-and then, you know,
| work all the time. But / am q
great-grandmother," she continued,
thoughtfully, so how can these many
compliments be true? ! am afraid my
friends are exaggerating."
Nine. Bernhardt's laugh, spontane-
Gus as a girls. prompted a chorus OF
mo, mol"
YES" said the actress, "uncon-
scious exaggeration, like the French
nurse on the boulevard. Our boule-
wards are much more crowded than
your streets, you know, and, although
we have numerous accidents, things
aren't quite sc bad as the as-=e ::S
gested.
Her little charge, a boy OF six,
begged her 10 stop a while in a crowd,
surrounding an automobile accident.
Please wait the little boy said, Want
TO see the man who was run over.
No; hurry bis nurse answered.
There will be plenty more to see
further on"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
New process Of STAINING Glass.

The art of coloring glass has been
lost and rebound, ~jealously guarded
and m~aliciously stolen SO many times
in the history Of civilization that II
seems almost impossible to say any
thing new on glass staining. Yet q
process has been discovered for ma
king the stained glass used In windows
which is q departure from anything
known at the present time. What the
Venetians and the Phoenicians knew
of It we cannot tell.
The glass FIRST receives its design I'm
mineral colors and the whole is then
fred in a heat so intense that the col
oring matter and the glass are indis-
solubly fused. The most attractive
feature of this method Is that the sur
face acquires rssss= rrsss5ie1 saS-
acter in the heat, SO that when tho
glass Is In place the lights are delight
fully soft and mellow.
In making a large window In many
shades each panel is separately mould
ed and bent and the sections are as.
sembled In a metal frame.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
La The Rleh indian

The per capita wealth of the Indian
Is approximately $2,130, that for other
Americans Is only a little more than
81 300. The lands owned by the In
dams are rich in oil, timber and other
natural resources of all kinds. Some
of the best timber land in the United
States is owned by Indians.
The value Of their agricultural lands
runs up in the millions. The ranges
which they possess support about $780,
600 sheep and cattle, owned by lessees,
bringing In a revenue Of more than
ST., 900 to the various tribes besides
providing feed for more than 1900, o0O
head of horses, cattle, sheep and goats
belonging to the Indians themselves.
Practically the only asphalt deposits
in the United States are on Indian
lands.--Red Man.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06

/ think our conversational soprano,
as sometimes overheard In the cars.
arising from a group Of young persons
who have taken the train at one OF
our great industrial centers, for In
stance, young persons OF the female
sex. we will say. who have hustled In
full dressed, engaged in loud, strident
speech, and who, after free discussion,
have fixed on two CT more double
seats, which having secured, they pro-
coed to eat apples and hand round
daguerreotypes-I say. I think the
conversational soprano, heard under
these circumstances, would not be
among the allurements the old enemy
would put in requisition were he get
ting UP a new temptation of ST. An
thony.
There are sweet voices among us,
we all know, and voices not musical.
it may be. to those who bear them
fer the ere. .i.se yet s=ses.e- =
than any we shall hear until we listen
to some warbling angel in the over
ture to that eternity of blissful har-
monies we hope to enjoy. But why
should / tell lies? II my friends love
me, it is because / try to tell the
truth. / never heard but two voices
in my life that frightened me by their
observation-disclosures.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Why He Laudhed.

Miss Matte belonged to the old
routh, and she was entertaining a
!uest of distinction.
On the morning following his arrival
he told Tillie, the little colored maid,
o take a pitcher Of fresh water to
dr. Firman's room, and to say that
diss Matte sent him her compliments,
Ind that IL he wanted q bath, the
bathroom was at his service.
When T1llie returned she said:
Il tot him, Miss Matte, en- he
aughed At to bus hisseif."
Why did he laugh, Tillie?"
II dunno"
What did you tell him."
Jus what you toll me TO-"
"Tillie, tell me exactly what you
aid"
Il banged de doah, and I said, Mr..
nrman, Miss Matte sends you her lub,
ind she says, Now you a get up
md wash yo'selfl"-Lippincott's Mag
zine.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
MosIem Traditions.

Ramadan is the month exalted by
Moslems above all others. IN that
month the Koran-according to Mos
lem tradition-was brought down by
Gabriel from heaven and delivered to
men in small sections. In that month,
Mohammed was accustomed to retire
from Mecca to the cave of Hira, for
prayer and meditation. In that month
Abraham, Moses and other prophets
received their divine revelations. In
that month the doors of heaven are
always open, the passages to hell are
shut, and the devils are chained" So
run the traditions.-The Christian
Herald.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Had Money In Lumps.

Charles HI. Rosenberg of Bavaria
had Jumps on his shoulders, elbows,
and hips when he arrived here from
Hamburg on the Kaiserin Auguste Vic
toria. In fact. there was a series Of
smaller Jumps along his spine, much
ike a mountain range, as 1t is present
ed on a bas-relief map.
The Jumps were about the size of
good Oregon apples, and as Rosen-
berg passed before the immigration
DOCTOR for observation, the doctor said
softly to himself, See that lump"
Then he asked Mr.. Rosenberg to step
aside.
you seem like a healthy man."
said the doctor, "but / cannot pass you
until / know the origin of those Jumps
on your body" "Ah, it is not a sick
ness" laughed the mar from Bavaria.
Those swellinss is money"
Taking off his coat he broke open a
sample lump and showed that it con-
tanned $500 in American bank notes.
He informed the doctor that he had
s11 1000 in all, with which he was go
ing to purchase an apple orchard in
oregon
He was admitted to the country
New York Tribune.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
What About Brain Food?
This Question Came Up i'm the Recent
- Trial for Libel.

A Weekly printed scmo criticis--s &C the
not fancy our reply printed In various news
papers, and brought suit for libel. At the trial
some interesting facts came out.
Some Of the chemical and medical experts
differed widely.
The following facts, however, were quite
clearly established:
Analysis Of brain by an unquestionable au-
thority, Geoghegan, shows Of Mineral Salts,
Phosphoric Acid and Potash combined (Phos-
plate OF Potash, 2.91 per cent of the total,
5.33 Of all Mineral Salts.
This is over one-half.
Beaunis, another authority, shows "Phos-
phoric Acid combined" and Potash 73.44 per
cent from a total OF 101.07.
Considerable more than one-half of Phos-
plate of Potash.
Analysis of Grape-Nuts shows: Potassium
and Phosphorus, (Which join and make Phos-
phate Of Potash, is considerable more than
one-half Of all the mineral salts in the food.
DR.. Geo. W.. Carey. an authority on the con-
stituent elements of the body. says: "The
gray matter OF the brain Is controlled entirely
by the inorganic c~ell-salt, Potassium Phosphate
phosphate OF Potash). This salt unites with
albumen and by the addition Of oxygen creates
nerve MUD or tne gray matter OF the brain.
OF course. there Is a trace Of other salts and
other organic matter In nerve fluid. but Potas-
stun Phosphate is the chief factor. and has
the power within itself to attract, by its own
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Home Thouuht.

'Tt must have been frightful," said
Mrs. Bossim to her husband, who was
in the earthquake. "Tell me what
was your first thought when you
awakened In your room at the hotel
and heard the alarm"
my first thought vas of YOU" an
swered Mr.. Bossim.
How noble!"
Eyes. First thing / knew, a vas on
the mantel caught me on the ear:
then q chair whirled in my direction.
and when | jumped to the middle OF
the four or FIVE books and Q
framed picture struck me all at once
Even after saying that, he affected
to wonder what made her SO angry for
the remainder of the evening.-Mack'z
National Monthly.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Hard on the Mare.

Twice, as the bus slowly wended its
way up the steep Cumberland Gap, the
door at the rear opened and slammed.
At Arst those inside paid little heed:
but the third time demanded to know
why they should be disturbed in this
fashion.
Whist" cautioned the driver,
doan't spake SO loud; she'll overhear
u.s.
"Who?"
The mare. Spake low! Shure, oi'm
desavin tn crayture. EVERY tonne
she ears tn door close, she thinks
won o. yez is gettin' down ter walk
up tn hill. n that sort a raises her
sperrits.'-Success Magazine.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Where He Was Queer.

The negro, on occasions. displays a
me discrimination in the choice of
words.
Who's the best Whitewater In
.own?" inquired the new resident.
ALE Hall am a bond Artist with q
rhitewash brush, sah," answered the
:olored patriarch eloquently.
We'll, tell him to come and white
wash my chicken house tomorrow"
Uncle Jacob shook his head dubt-
susly.
"Ah don believe, sab, ah'd engage
Me Hall to whitewash a chicken
house, sab"
why, didn't you say he was a good
Ehitewasher?"
Eyes, sab, a powerful good white
washer, sab; but mighty queer about
l chicken house, sab, mighty ~queer!"
-Mack's National Monthly.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
The League Of Pollteness.

The League Of Politeness has been
formed in Berlin. 1t aims at inculcat-
ing better among the people
Of Berlin. 1t was founded upon the
initiative Of Fraulein Cecelie Meyer,
who was inspired by an existing or.
~ganization in Rome. In Difference to
the parent organization the. Berlin
league has chosen the Italian motto,
PRO g~entilezza." This will be en-
blazoned upon an attractive little
medal worn where Germans are &C
customed to wear the insignia of or
ders. The idea is that a GLANCE at
the "talisman" will annihilate any IN
clination to indulge In bad temper or
discourteous language. ANY polite
person. Is eligible for membership.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
How She learned.

The mother Of a family Of three
small children was discussing their
comparative %precocity with q friend,
John was very slow at everything"
she said, referring to her oldest. 'Tom
was a little better, and Edith. the
baby, is the smartest of all. She picks
up everything quick as can be-"
Master John, who had been listen
Ing, now contributed his share of the
conversation.
"Humphi" he exclaimed. II know
why her learns SO quick. It's cause
her has us and we didn't have u.s."
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Intoxicants and Tobacco.
From Harper's Weekly.


We are drinking more alcoholic drinks
than ever, more not only in gross, but
per capita. So the internal revenue bureau
says after toting up its receipts for the
year ending on the 30th day OF last june.
Here is its report of some OF the prod
ucts that paid taxes:
1863, 600, 900 gallons of distilled spirits, 3d.
900, 900 gallons more than the year before.
q 50 495. III barrels Of fer,nented liquors, 81
increase OF 5000, 900 barrels.
1900, 100000 cigars, 160,OO,oD more than
1908.
100000.
402, 900, 900 pounds OF plug, fine cut, cube
cut, granulated, or sliced smoking or
chewing tobacco or snuff, 100000 pounds
more than the year before.
141, 1862, 2S2 pounds of oleomargarine, 50,-
000, 900 pounds increase.
1t appears that the consum ption of spir-
its Increased last year over 20 per cent.
Perhaps taxes were paid on more liquor
than was drunk, but the payments from
year to year are a pretty close measure
of consumption. a drinking should in
crease in the face of so much prohibition
and local option legislation causes some
establishment, but is not, We believe, con-
trarv to axnariance. Legislation may have
an effect on manners. lnethods, and de-
tails of consumption, but it does not
change habits. Prohibition, II Maine IS
any criterion, does not HSlp at al III pro-
noting temperance. Local option may do
good, but is more likely to benefit the ris-
ing generation than the one whose habits
are formed.
1t Is possible that IN spite of the internal
revenue figures the manner of drinking
may be improved and the drinks better
distributed.
1t bears on this subject that of the 9,N0,-
600 of population in New York state 7,00,-
O0 live in cities. Local option In this
state is confined to country townships.
The increase of city population all over
the country has doubtless a relation to
| this increase in the consumption both of
alcohol ans tobacco, The nervous tension
of city life is greater than OF country life,
calling more for stimulants, and afford
ing more convenient opportunities to get
them. Drinking and smoking, too, are
both social practices, and there Is more
society in the cities than in the country.
The consumption of spirits has increased
more in proportion than the consumption
| of beer. and the consumption Of cigarets
more than of cigars. The report is not
complimentary to legislation.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
One From the Cashier.

The harmless customer leaned
ACROSS the cigar counter and smiled
engagingly at the new cashier. As he
handed across the amount his dinner
check called for he ventured a bit Of
aimless converse, for he was of that
sort.
Funny" said he, "how easy it Is to
spend money"
Well" snapped the cashier as she
fed his fare to the register, IF money
was intended for you to hold on to the
mint would be turning out coins with
handles on EN-"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Economy.

The late former Governor Allen d.
Gambler of Georgia was famous in
the south for his quaint humor.
Governor Gambler" said a Gaines
vile man. "once abandoned cigars for
a pipe at the beginning of the year.
He stuck to his resolve till the years
end. Then he was heard to say:
"By actual calculation, have
saved by smoking a pipe instead of
cigars this year $20S. But where is
it2'n
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06

law of affinity, all things needed to manufac-
ture the elixir of life"
Further on he says: THE beginning and end
of the matter is to supply the lacking princi-
pie, and IN molecular form, exactly as nature
furnishes 1t in vegetables, fruits and grain.
To supply defciencies-this Is the only law Of
cure.
The natural conclusion is that IL Phosphate
of Potash is the needed mineral element In
brain and you use food which does not contain
1t, you have brain flag because It's daily loss is
not supplied.
On the contrary, IL you eat food known to
be rich In this element, you place before the
life forces that which nature demands for
brain-bthlding.
In the trial a sheer was uttered because MI.
Post announced that he had made years of re-
search in this country and some clinics of
Europe, regarding the effect OF the mind on
digestion Of food.
But we must be patient with those who
sneer at facts they know nothing about.
Mind does not work well on a brain that is
broken down by lack of nourishment.
A peaceful and evenly poised mind is neces-
sary to good digestion.
Worry. anxiety, fear, hate, &C., &C., directly
interfere with or stop the flow of Ptyalin, the
digestive juice of the mouth, and also inter
Tere win tine now or the digestive Juices or
stomach and pancreas.
Therefore, the mental state of the individual
has much to do (mo-e than susrocted) with
digestion.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
MAKE UP YOUR MIND.

II you'il make up you mind to be
ConIented with ycur ior
And with the optimists agree
That troubles soon forgot,
You'1l be surprised to find. I guess.
Despite mis%fortune's darts.
What constant springs Of happiness
Lie hid in human hearts:
What sunny CLEANS and golden dream,
The passing years unfold,
low soft and warm the lovelight beam
When you are growing old.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Sentence

Henry f. Cope in the Chicago Tribune.
You DO not lift the world by rolling up
your eyes.
You possess only as much faith as pos
sesses you.
You can not love truth and fight free
dom in thinking.
The whirlwind of passion scatters many
of the seeds of sin.
1t takes more than a singing vocabulary
to MAKE a prophet.
The bic fences are not always around
the best fruit trees.
People who borrow trouble always give
more than they get.
Clearing some of the clouds from earth
clears TIE vision OF heaven.
The test OF piety comes not In the pews,
but II, the press OF da+iy life.
Ne one can measure the fortune Of the
man who leaves many friends.
It's no usa talking about walking with
God IL you're wabbling before men.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06

"Of course" said Mr.. Sirius Barker.
Il wan my daughter to have some
sort of an artistic education. ! think
I'll have her study singing"
why not art or literature?"
cart spoils canvas and paint and
literature wastes reams of paper.
Singing merely produces a temporary
disturbance Of the atmosphere.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
a MedlcaI -compromIss.

You had two doctors in consulta-
ton last night. didn't your"
Yes"
What did they say?"
Well, one recommended one thing
and the other recommended some
thing else"
"A deadlock, eh?"
mo, they finally told me to mix
'em!"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Tho "country churchyard.'

Those who recall Grays EIegy IN
a Country G~huTchyard" VIII remember
that the peaceful spot where "the
rude forefathers OF the hamlet sleep"
is identified with st. Giles, Stoke
Poges, Buckinghamshire. In the pro
sale pages Of a recent issue Of the
Gazette there appears an order in
council providing that ordinary inter.
ments are henceforth forbidden In the
churchyard.
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Thanks 70 Burnt Cork.

Gosh! But the colored ace is a.
comm to the front fast!" whispered
innocent Uncle Hiram. at the vaude-
vile show, as the black-face comedian
was boisterously a~pplauded.
"Yes, indeed" smiled the city man;
ANYONE can see that that fellow is a
self-made negro"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06

Grouchly-By denying myself three
ten-cent cigars daily for the past 20
years | figure that / have saved $3.50.
Moxley--Is that so?"
Grouchly-Yes. Say, let me have a
chew of your tobacco, will you?
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06

Were you nervous when you pro-
posed to your wife?" asked the senti-
mental person.
No. replied Mr.. Meekton: "but X
I could have foreseen the next ten
years / would have BEEN
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
Acted like che Genuine.

THE landlady says that new board
er is a foreign nobleman."
Bogus, TIL bet"
"Oh, l don't know. He may be the
real thing. He hasn't paid her a cent
as yet"
Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1911-01-06
4 Retractlom.

"You shouldn't have called that man
q pig" said the conciliatory man,
That's right" replied the vindictive
person. There is no sense In imply
ing that he's worth 40 cents a pounf
to anybody"