The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, 1911-03-17
PRESS NOTES

Teddy, Jr., expects stork.- Daily
Courier. Taking Dads advice, we
see.
The Walnut lives 1000 years.
Port Jervis Union. How'd you like
to be a walnut?
~ ~ ~
A physician says that early rising
shortens life. Well show that clip
ping to our boss.
Public men cannot bluff news
papers, says Governor Wilson.
Neither can men in private life.
~ ~ ~
Fred.-Will help you in your
trouble; did not send check, is a
N. Y. Herald personal. Fat lot of
help you are, Edna.
~ ~ ~
Comedian shot to death.-Johns-
town Democrat. Probably one in
stance in which he couldn't find any
humor.
1t is so much easier to get religion
than it is to keep it.-Providence
Register. It's just the opposite
with money,
~ ~ ~
Fifth Ave. Marriage Bureau.-N.
Y. Sun headline. Wonder if the
Goulds and Vanderbilts will con-
duct the correspondence course.
~ e: e:
Bod Chanler in Bermuda Study
| ing Angel Fish, mours the N. Y.
American. His last fish story was
also about am angel, SO we recollect.
West Pikeland Pencilings is the
way the West Chester Daily News
captions their correspondence and
then they go right ahead and ink it
~ ~ ~
Mr.. Harden in alienation suit
against Mr.. Hoops becomes irritable
at questioning ,screeches the N. Y
Herald Whoops, my dear Mr.. Har'
den.
Girl ran to school and dropped
Dead.-N. Y. American. Pupils o.
Wayne county, take warning. Bet
ter to be late few times than for
ever absent.
~ - ~
Finds buzz saw active. Maj
Shows how one finger was cut OIL
Well, practice makes perfect, doesn'
it.
~ ~ .&
The man who finished last in tn,
Statue of Liberty flight is to get thu
$4,000 prize. Another illustration
that the first shall be last and th
last shall be first.
~ - ~
"Blatt and Converse Kidnapped il
Mexica," headlines the N. Y. Trib
une. From the amount of fus
J made about it it would seem tha
the first gentleman is living up t.
his name.
= Three cases of scarlet feve
. among the four hundred students a
, the Bryn Mawr College for Girl
within the last twenty-four hours re
suited in the faculty practically clos
ing the college to-day.-N. Y. Her
| aid. How badly the other 397 mus
f feel.
The case of the Commonwealth VS.
wink" Knobs, for assault and bat
= terry upon Charles Pency Vanderpoo
! which was to have been heard befor
Justice j. H. Orcutt this afternoo
was continued for one week.-PeC
: ple's Daily Advocate. This was nc
/ case of winking at Justice. Th
. prosecutor failed to appear.
: - ~ ~
A report from Camel City say
e two women, Mamie and Mar
= Combs, were horsewhipped by mo
\ of fifty men and ninety wome1
They had been warned to leave tn
county.-Carbondal Leader. The
e should have needed the warning,
S we may venture to say so.
: ~ ~ ~
A Carbondale man was tellin
that he thought his town had tn
, stingiest man in Pennsylvania,
r not in the world He got married t
e homely girl to save expense
y They walked around the town for
bridal tour. He bought her nicl
els worth of stick candy for a wet
ding present, then suggested thu
they save the candy for he children
-Carbondale Leader. Serve hir
o right If he didn't have any.
v ~ ~ ~
Cashier Disappears.
q Kentucky bank is looted of ovt
$50, 0,000.-Daily Courier. We are S
Il bright that we could have guesse
y the second and third lines merely
e reading the first.
. ~ ~ ~
- Easily Satisfied.
Following that chase on Satu
day | travelled about twenty mill
q on foot but did not feel weary at tt
s. finish because the hunters capture
,s the fox and l was satisfied. ."-Pel
- rose King, in the West Chest,
y Daily Local News.
l. Stomach Remedy
~,---A4 l. ~ Wy no:I