davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

"Waiter" roared the diner The
waiter looked intently out Of the win
dow, pretending he hadn't heard. The
diner had already complained Of his
chop and his chips and his napkins,
and Alphonse had had about enough
OF him. "Waiter" Reluctantly Al
phonse moved over. "Just look at the
color OF this water. waiter" growled
the diner. ITS not At TO drink
Critically the waiter raised the glass
10 the light and examined It. Then
triumphantly he set It down again.
mo. sir; you're decelving yourself,
sir" he said kindly. THAT waters
perfectly all right, sir. Its the glass
what's dirty"-pittsburg Leader
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
No Joke About This.

Colonel John IL. Carroll. the biz St
Louis railroad lawyer. came cut Of his
hotel in Washington the other day,
red in the face and humping the side
walk vigorously with his cane.
What's the matter. colonel|" asked
a friend who met him.
Matter" replied Carroll "Why. It
has got So now in these hotels that II
costs more for tips than 1t does for
food and room. This morning | sent
down a pair Of shoes 10 be cleaned.
One boy brought up one shoe, and five
minutes later another boy appeared
with the other shoe. and each ex-
pected tip"-Philadelphia saturday
Evening Post
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Johnson ard Tho Smart Children.

Full Of Indignation against such
parents as delight to produce their
young ones early into the talking
world, Samuel johnson gave a good
deal Of pain by refusing to hear the
verses the children could recitc or
the songs they could sing. One
friend tod him that his two sons
should repeat Gray's "Elegy' to
him alternately. that he might
judge who had the happiest ca
dence.
mo; pray, sir" said he, '1et the
dears both speak at once
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Sold 1t in the Court House.

Today the Recorder gave six
months to Feb Helms, white. and
fifteen months TO Lewis Ingram,
colored, for the matter of selling
whiskey. The reason the darkey
got more is that he is an old of
fender in this line. Both gave
notice of appeal. The interest
ing feature is that they made
their delivery to parties whom
they had engaged to under the
steps of the court house that lead
up into the court room. This was
ON Saturday and that afternoon
they were arrested ON the charge
by Chief Laney and Constable
Fowler.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Rally at Wellington.

The annual educational rally
at the Wellington School
preceding the opening of the
school, was held Saturday. a
large crowd was present and the
picnic dinner was of the class that
cant be beaten. The addresses
of the day We're made by Messrs.
J. G.. NJ. Vann and W. J. Pratt
of the Monroe bar. Neither of
these gentlemen claims to he an
orator. but each talks sound sense
that make their speeches both in
teresting and helpful. The school
opened Yesterday with good pros
poets for fine session.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Bows Jaw Bone Broken.

Wesley, the eight year old s:n
of Mr.. s. A. Montgomery of Blu
ford township, was kicked by a
mule last Friday night and re.
eeived a very ugly wound. II
became necessary to take out the
upper bone which was done by
Drs. Nance and Redfearn. On
Sunday night the little fellow
was taken to Charlotte for treat
ment.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
COMING INTO
FASHION.
Society Women Wear Them and
Jewellers Hope the Fad Will
Grow.


Grow.
New York Dispateh.)
No. she isn't losing anything.
That CLEAN of gold and jewels
just above her little pump is
right where il belongs. Her own
dainty hands, or those of her
maid. elasped il about the con
tour of the black silk stocking.
for that is the place il was made
for.
AnkletS are coming into fash
ion. Already they flash over the
waxen floors of town and co,n-
try bathrooms. and il wont be
long, if one may believe prophet
ic jewelers. before one can get a
glimpse of gold and jewels about
my lady s ankle as she climbs
out of her automobile ON the aft
ernoon shopping tour.
OF course Cleopatra wore them.
Who knows but that particular
enhancement of her charms was
the final touch that made Mare
Antony throw the world away at
Actium' They still wear anklets
in the East, behind the lattices of
harems, but they are not so COM
mon in Europe and they are still
rare this side of the Atlantic.
1t was only a week or two ago
that fair dancer appeared at
Manhattan beach with band of
gem-incrusted gold clasping her
open-work stockings. She crea-
ted IA sensation. But so swiftly
was she whirled hither and thith-
err TO the lively music of a two
step that onlookers could not tell
whether opals or emeralds or ru-
bies had the honor of shin
ing there.
A day or two since Mrs. Lou
Use Winterfield, wife of the bank
er, caused heads to turn as she
left the Ritz-Carlton early in the
evening. For she wore. as the
fortunate ones who saw it say. a
diamond anklet that could not
be worth less than $4,000. Some
made it $4,000.
Fifth avenue jewelers. are be-
ginning to sit up and take no.
tlce, Tor each of the new trink-
cts worn means a fat order for
one of them.
The anklet is made in one or
two pieces, according to the pre-
ference of the wearer. But the
prime requisite is that il fits per-
fectly. Because of the move
ment of the ankle in walking. il
requires Il master of the Jewell
er S art so to shape the gold or
silver band that it will set close
~ and at the same time allow
perfect freedom Of movement.
The less expensive anklets are
made with an opening usually at
the back, but the ones that are
studded with diamonds M other
preelons gems are cunningly
fashioned SO that their circum-
ference expands or contracts as
the owner walks. The joints are
placed at the sides
Whether the new form of fem
decoration will become so
common that 10 and % ct. stores
will add them to their stock of
lewelry is a matter for specula- !
ion. 1t is quite easy to imagine
such n condition
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Huunor and
Philosophy
~ DUNCAN ~. SFIrH
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

MANY men would be entirely willing
70 pay their debts II they could
spare the money from their current ex-
penses,
The big stick offers the only kind OF
argument that some people will lend
an ear TO-
Pride may warm the cold and feed
the hungry. but ii won't pay either the
tailor or the grocer.
Sometimes We feel SO smart that We
act silly.
The things that you didn't intend TO
do generally are way ahead Of the
things that you did mean 10 do.
Although many misfortunes are
singular, they are said never 10 come
sinsly.
Women may be alike. but on ac-
quaintanee every one Of them turns
out different
II is easier for a spendthrift 10 make
friends than TO keep them.
When a man isn't busy paying his
wife's bills he is engaged In guessing
what viii happen next
II Is easy TO be interested II the sub
ject matter affects you favorably.
Marrying isn't so bad. but staying
married or unmarrying Is sometimes
difficult
In the case Of the con man seeing Is
pretty certain 10 be deceiving.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Boys Arrested for Fratricide.
[ WiIkesbOrO Chronicle

y W " Nfil
Cleve and Carr Huffman of
Lewis Fork were arrested last
week charged with numbering
their brother, Lindsay Huffman.
about three years ago. The case
was continued and the boys gave
bond for 81 600 each. The diff.
Guilty occurred some three years
ago. The boys had been to an
exhibition. as we remember. and
returning home, they got into
scuffie over pistol. and the pis-
toll went off, inflicting a wound
on Huffman which caused his
death in a short time.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
A Matter OF Honor.

IF you were married 10 woman
who had secured divorce from an
other man would you permit her to
keep on drawing allmony from him."
mo. sir; should not think of coun-
tenancing such thing unless the
amount was sufficient 10 make 1t pos
slble for me 10 give up my job
Chicago Record Herald
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Sunday School Statistics.

There are five churches IN
Monroe. each of which have reg
ularly organized Sunday schools.
This does not include North Mon
roe and leemorlee. On last Sun
day the Lutheran Sunday school
did not meet. The attendance
and the collections at the other
SUNDAY schools were as follows
Attendance. Collection.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Feeling Big.

met my old friend Reggie Jones.
Who slyly dropped the hint
That he would like hundred bones.
AS though were a mint
II sort OF dazed me for spell.
For | had mighty few.
But for the compliment fell
And bought the drinks for two.
met a man named William Black
Upon a busy street.
He slyly slapped me on the back
And trod upon my feet.
oven need a president next fall"
He said, the man you are"
! heard ambitions feeble call
And bought him cigar
met a lady dressed in style
Mixed in the busy throng.
She turned on me her latest smile
And said. My. you're so strongl"
Her baggage, that would fill shelf,
carried with delight
And made a pack horse OF myself
To prove that she was right
And that's the way with any gent,
As careful ones may note.
Just toss a little compliment
And he will be the goat
The things that money will not land
With taffy you may get
He likes TO hear his praises and
VIII pay the price. you bet
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

IA nice husband you arep said
madam in a passion. "You care less
about me than about those pet ami
mails of yours. Look what you did
when your poodle, Azor, died"
Husband (quietly)-Well, / had him
stuffed. Wife (exasperated)-You
wouldn't have gone to that expense
for me-not you, indeedl
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Just as Announced.

Recently a minister gave out from
the pulpit that on the following Sun
day he would discuss family scan
DIAL. When Sunday came the church
was filled until standing room was at
q premium. lie talked about Eve be-
Ing beguled by the serpent.-Buffalo
Commercial
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
An unfailina Sion.

"Oh, dear" sighed the wife, this
new dress doesn't III me ut ALL"
"Why, 1t looks all right" rejoined
her husband "What makes you think
1t doesn't flti"
Because it's too comfortable" she
explained Chicago News.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
His Worries.

ERE, Bill, wot's the matter? Your,
lookin' worried"
Work nothln' but work from
mornln' till night"
"'0w long ave you been at itr'
II begin tomorrow M. A. p.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

Never leave home on journey without
bottle Of Ctamberlain's Collie, Cholera and
Diarrhoes Remedy. II is almost certain to
he needed and cannot be obtained when on
board the cars or steamships. For sale by
all dealers.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Noticeable.

II am very frank"
That is only another name for be-
ing disagreeable.
Think so?"
II know It."
"You have quite streak of frank
ness yourself, haven't your"
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
do You know y
loaded.

HE is going to take a chance on
matrimony."
but he can't"
"why noti"
Because no man has ghost OF
chance In matrimony."
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Rain Enough to Drown a Pig.

Messenger and lntelllgencer.
The heaviest rain that has pas
Sed over this section in three
years fell Sunday afternoon and
last night. Lands were badly
washed in many places and much
corn was blown down. The wat.
or spread over the yards of the
ginnery of the Southern Cotton
Oil Company. near the town
bridge, and drowned a pig be.
longing to Mr.. Stephen Iuntly
which was in a pen back of the
store. A rock dam on Mr.. ID. A.
McGregor's lot in the western
part of the town was also wash
ed away. The dam cost Mr.. Me
Gregor over 800. Notwithstand.
ing the incidental damage the
rain will be of great benefit to
late cotton, corn and peas.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Law Of Averages.

LaW OF NNtTaYes.
II am going to have some mighty
good luck pretty soon"
you are?"
"You bet"
"How do you know
"Cause ! never had anything but
bad luck"
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
COMPRESSED Time,

When on the scene a bull appears
And no strong fence Is near
A man lives In a minute then
About a half a year.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

BY flying the 2S6 miles from
st. Louis TO Chicago Monday,
with only two intermediate stops,
and in an actual flying time of
five hours and forty-three min
utes, Harry N. Atwood, of Bos-
ton, believes he has set q pace
which will result in his establish
ing a new record for his flight
by aeroplane from st. Louis to
New York and Boston. AS it is
he appears to have broken the
American record for single day
flight. The best previous Amer
lean record was made by Atwood
hndscli when he flew AS miles
frcm Atlantic City to Baltimore
on July 10. 1911.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
The Cipher.

The Cipher.
"Why does that poet begin 30 many
Of his verses with or"
Perhaps" replied Miss Cayenne,
because that is the mathematical
symbol that represents their exact
value. Washington Star.
Poor Women.
IT'S very sad
Bout Mrs wldge.
She can't improve
Her game Of bridge.
birmingham tAla) Age-IIerald.
It's sadder still
Bout Mrs Ball.
She thinks that she
Has learned II all.
Chicago Record Herald.
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Nightmare.

81 love excitement"
THAT must be the reason you eat
mince pie at night"
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

Chance For the Enterprisins.
"Seen the cometT
There amt no comet this year."
"But the town went wet, didn't itT
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

The Effect. .i4
81 hate dyspepsia"
"Why?"
1T makes me so cross"
"Why. | never knew you had It."
Il haven't. Mother has It."
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22

Getting Even.
Why so hap
pyT
MY mother In
law has come for
a visit"
Quit kidding"
Fact! There
is somebody in
the house who
can boss my
wife"
The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1911-08-22
Rich Wife.

Rich Wife. u
How can he love herp az
"why" vi
"She is so homely." =.
"But he is so fond OF money"
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

home, WHO. nip out of their snlcii
earnings to support tie home, want
to know all about the management of
affairs. Our delegation should consid-
er this matter and if they think it nee
essary, the investigation ought to be
made.-Spartanburg Journal.
There is very little need to have an
investigation By your delegation to
find out what it costs to maintain the
Confederate home. A reference to
the appropriation bill as passed by the
last legislature will show you that the
appropriation for 1911 is $4,000. A
report from the home could be neces-
sary for you to know just how this
money is expended. Under the act
creating the home only two soldiers
are received from each county. We
suppose if some county did not have
two more than two could be received
priation for this year makes the main
from some other county. The appro-
tenance about $175 each per annum.
The home cost to build about $4,000.
AS a member of the legislature We
opposed the appropriation for the
building Of the home, and it was due
largely to the efforts Of Capt. J. H.
Brooks, then senator from Greenwood
county, and the help given by Gen. W.
E. James, of Darlington, and a member
of the house, that the bill went
through.
Now that it is built We do not want
to see it torn down. 1t may cost a lit
tie more to keep those who are there
than is given to others, but if there
are any Confederate soldiers who have
no relatives to car for them, and no
home of their own, it is as little as the
State can do to furnish them a home
in their old age, and to give them such
comforts as that home may provide
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

In the bright lexicon of Greenwich
vocabulary there is no such word az
Cnicco.-Greenville News.
But don't blind tiger by any 9th
er name smell just as much like
booze?-Spartanburg Herald.
And they are not so awfully blind
in Greenville, but the stuff they hapc
out is awful. One thing may be sale
to the credit of the Charleston tiger
you can get something worth while
and the Chicco gin izz is O. Knew.
berry Herald and News. !
Coming from the Newberry Herald
and News this recommendation should
make the "Chicco Gin Fizz" the stan
dard. And in gin fizz wonderful
property that stirs human sympathy
and makes fitness for public office q
matter of no OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
burg Herald.
We were talking about blind tigers
and gin fzzes and no. about fitness
for office. 1t is a E.;;;tor of fact, all
the same, that Charleston is not the
only place where the blind tiger eX-
lists, or where whisney is illegally
sold.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA,
COUNTY OF NEWBERRY.

BY Frank NJ. Schumpert, Esquire,
Probate Judge.
WHEREAS, E. H. Longshore made
suit to me to grant him letters of ad-
ministration of the estate Of and ef-
fects of Mrs. Maggie S. Longshore,
THESE ARE THEREFORE to cite
and admonish all and singular the
kindred and creditors of the said Mrs.
Maggie S. Longshore, deceased, that
they be and appear before me, in the
Court of Probate, to be held at New
berry, S. c., on the 9Th day of Decem-
ber, next after publication thereof, at
II o'clock in the forenoon, to show
cause, if any they have, why the said
administration should not be granted.
GIVEN under my hand, this Goth
day of November Ammo Domili, 1911.
Frank NJ. Schumpert,
J. P. for N. C.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
THE VETERANS HONE IN COLTM-
BIA.

BlA.
A legislative committee, with the as
sistance of veterans who performed &C
tual service, should investigate the
Confederate Veterans home in Column
bia.
Is there any real need of the institu-
ton? What is the average number OF
veterans in the home? Were they all
in actual service on the firing line?
Are there any men there who are not
entitled to a place.. What is the cost
per month to keep each veteran? Are
they all disabled men who can not do
manual labor? Do any of them have
Jobs in the city and conduct a regular
business and use the home as a free
lodging and boarding house? How
many men and women are employed to
care for the home and what pay do
they receive?
These questions are not to be con-
strued as charges, but the veterans at
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
Thanksgiving Sale.
Secretary.

Caldwell & HaltiWanger are adye"-
tising a big Thanksgiving sale, in
which they are offering some attrac-
tive bargains in all departments OF
their big dry goods and ladies' a3d
children's furnishing store A care
full reading of their advertisement ii
this issue will we'll rep@E the buying
public.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

The Greenville Piedmont says that
oil and water will not mix. Neither
will whiskey and gasoline mix
when it is tried you generally see an
automobile lying against the fence
smashed to pieces the next morning.
Greenwood Journal.
We do not know about whiskey and
gasoline, but suppose you ask John
Floyd, of Spartanburg, about oil and
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

|How did Blease ever get to be
governor of South Carolina any way?
asks the Durham (N. CO. Sun: Through
the vote of Charleston.-GreenVllle
Piedmont.
We thought he received few votes
in Anderson and Pickens and Green
vile and Laurens, and Spartanburg
and few other countess but maybe
we are mistaken.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
Pulaski Lodge, No. 80, J. @. O. +.

Pulaski Lodge, No. 30, J. o. 0. F.
Pulaski lodge, No. 20, |. O. O, F.,
will meet in klettner's Hall Friday
evening, November 24, at o'clock. Al!
members are requested &c attend.
J. Y. Jones,
W. G. Peterson, Noble Grand.
Secretary
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

And speaking of Blease, does any
body remember what ever became of
Patterson, of Tennessee? ee?-Greenvllle
News.
II was ever thus. The man who
rides in the chariot today may push
the wheel-barroW tomorrow.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
NOTICE..

Sealed applications will be received
until December l, 1911, for the posi-
tions of County Physician and Keeper
of the County Home for the year 1912
L. 7. Feagle,
11-2l-3t. County Supervisor.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

Mr.. Carnegie has set apart another
S25,O0O,0O0 to be given to libraries
Wish you were library
News
We wouldn't mind very much if We
didn't have to erect ourself into Car
regie monument.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

The supreme court of North Carolina
holds that it is against the law to lend
friend a bottle of whiskey, or even
a drink.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

Nothing heard from Fielder yet
Greenwood Journal.
Is that so? We thought that you
were hearing from him right often,
but all that he was saying was that he
was coming soon.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

water. He SAYS it will M: ALI! Wien
properly mixed makes the finest har-
ness lubricator he has ever tried
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
Different Kind of Load.

Mail Carriers Load" is a head
line which keeps attracting our at
tention. But it's a patent medicine
advertisement and not a news item.
Different kind of lord.-Anderson
Mail
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

1enlIUu III tMl5 issue OI Inc hei aIu
and News. They are offering the pub
lie some fine values in a well-selected
stock.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21
Mems and Boys Clothing.

R. H. Anderson & Co. are offering
some attractive values in mems and
boys clothing, to which they call at
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

sold.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1911-11-21

11-21-3t.
The Columbus journal., 1911-01-11

There are altogether too many
Statesmen" and would-be leaders who
ontwardly pose as champions Of the
people but who behind the scenes are
opponents and servants of the priv.
leged class. As an eminent writer
has said, it is impossible for a states.
man, orator or writer to voice the
needs and demands Of the common
people unless he can enter into their
lives and see life and conditions from
their standpoint. Again there are
altogether too many people who at
tempt to gain power and notoriety by
blatant preachings in behalf of the
common herd. Too often the one who
presumes and assumes q role of this
character was born with q silver
spoon in his mouth and knows only of
the struggles of the common people as
viewed through the rich mans eyes.
Hastings Republican.
The Columbus journal., 1911-01-11
RADIUM.

1t seems to be pretty we'll agreed
among the scientists that radium is
distributed very widely over the earth,
being present in minute quantities
everywhere. Since it keeps itself con.
tinually II a temperature several de-
grees above that of its surroundings,
the question has been suggested wheth-
er the presence of radium could
account for the gradual increase of
temperature as We penetrate deeper
into the earth. 1t is believed in some
quarters that the amount of radium
present, if uniformly distributed, would
explain this increase and would &C.
count for all the heat lost from the
earth. In that case the date calculat.
ed by Lord Kelvin when this globe
will be 20 far cooled as to be uninhab.
liable might possibly be postponed for
. few million years.-Harper's.