East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1911-01-05
LOCAL ELKS ARRANGE
FOR ONE BIG Time


If you save money;
YOU'RE A CROUCH
If you spend it;
YOU'RE A LOAFER.
If you get it;
YOU'RE. A CRATER.
II you don't get y;
YOU'RE A BUM.
So what the his the use, Bill; come
out with the boys for one night.
Brother Frank Hennessey, a promi-
nent German or Swedish member Of
Portland lodge will be here and will
act as ringmaster. He will show you
how to make the wheels go round and
round and round-everything he says
goes and everything he forgets to say
goes just the same.
Assisting him will be our own Ex-
alted Ruler Brother Frank Quinlan,
in his new role, entitled "Toodles, the
Original Candy Kid"
We will also have the noted Swede
Singers and Yodellers. the famous
Bro. O'Keefe, Bro. O'Connor, Bro. A.
Sullivan in touching bullets and bal
lads.
Brother Tommy Thompson will
come out of his hole and chirp like a
gopher. This event will be framed
and hung on the walls of the club.
Don't fail to come and see our own
Bro. T. C. Taylor, as the original Bow
cry boy. He will attempt to smoke 10
cigarettes in one minute. Watch his
smoke. Pools will be sold on this
stunt before the event takes place, a
percentage of all bets go to the house.
Bro. Stuffy Lampkin will appear
in a cage and do the Sarah Bernhardt
laugh.
Hear that famous recitation:
The Punk is on the pumpkin
The ache is in your corns,
The cabman drives the cabbage
From the farm at early morn.'
With the 80 other stanzas by Brother
Charles j. Ferguson.
Bro. Thomas Smart, Pendleton's
famous entertainer will recite: when
Ireland Shall be Free" and will re-
spond to the encore with a song in his
well-known falsetto (that has often
drawn tears) "The Ache Of the Irish
Tooth"
Our own "Haunz," Bro. H. w. Col
Inns, will sing, 1.-TWO Can Live as
Cheap as One" He's convinced and
intends to try.
By special arrangements, (keep 1t
quiet and don't make it public so the
cops get wise) a six round bout be-
tween the bantam champion of the
Imnaha Athletic Club, Brother j.
Ross Dickson, and the noted feather
weight champion of the Coe Athletic
Sanitarium, Bro. Jimmy Kyle.
Brother w. A. Brown, the man with
the hair lip will tell the bunch the
story of Let 'er Buck" and will re-
spond to an encore, You Wouldn't
Know the Old Place Now"
Bro Geo. Darveau and Bro. Gus
La Fontaine, the acrobatic artists
will do three complete evolutions on
the trapeze and hang by their eye
brows from the horizontal bar, Dress
ed in green tights with calcium light
effect.
If you happen to get stung
Don't get sore at the world
And call it rotten;
Maybe it's only your own judgment.
Bro. Fred Judd will do the split act.
Red Raven or any other kind.
Great hammer throwing contest,
open to knockers only. This event
will take place on the roof
Bros Spell, Buck and Earl, the
storeroom trio, will appear in a COM
edy sketch-dresed in a silk hat.
Bro. Bill Dedman, the heavyweight
will wrestle with a canary bird for
points. Bros. C. Cooley and B. Bailey
will be the judges.
Between events the famous stale
Beer Orchestra" Parkes, Cheshire,
Godeck and Folsom, will discourse
agonizing strains
The great mind reader, Bro. L. G.
Frazier. He will tell the color of any
mans hair, eyes, and teeth, simply
by looking at him.
See that great mathematician Bro.
w. L. Thompson. He will tell you at
once how much you have in your
pocket simply by the size of your wad.
Bro. Till % Taylor, the pursuit man
will collect all concealed weapons at
the door-cork screws, eggs, etc.
That wonderful Oriental dansuese,
Bro. George Ferguson, the favorite
dancer of the Sultana's Harem will
dance 1.-THE Soul Kiss Waltz" in a
necktie and red spats.
Bro. Doc. Blakeslee, will address US
on the subject. The City Council
Did Not Issue Enough Saloon Licens-
es, or Outside of That Everything is
Alright"
Bro. Mark Moorhouse will below
like a bull and try and make you re-
alize the Importance of the per cent
proposition.
Dssestors Bros. McNabb and Lytle
will be on hand in case of an emer-
gency.
Brother George Strand, the famous
hand-cuff and lock king. See him. He
has been known to go in and out of
the Umatilla county Jail every day
for week.
To prevent a riot the committee
have also secured the services of the
artists Of the stubborn Cinderella
Company" who will be with us after
the show.
See "Roosey" as the Okhoond of
Swat. and Frank Frazier in the Sa-
lone dance.
Fix things at home so you won't
miss it-what's the use.
Bro. Jack Watson, a rusty haired
lad from Dublin who came over as
IT, -