The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1911-09-28
"CLOSED FOR
REPAIRS"
By M. QUAD
Copyright. 1911, by Associated Lit
erary Press.

Greenfield. There were six widowers
living there and all Of them farmers.
and three of the six were the school
trustees. For several years men teach
ers had been employed and had given
good satisfaction, but now they were
to change to the other sex. Widower
Thomas, the moderator, had suggested
the change, and he hadn't looked the
other two in the face as he did it. He
had simply said that he thought a
schoolma'am would teach the scholars
manners as well as geography. Mr..
Williams had agreed. but had at the
same time said to himself:
II understand his little game"
And Mr.. Burt had agreed with him,
but at the same time had said to him.
self:
1.-THE cute old rascal! But I see
through him as if he was made of
glass. If anybody around here mar
ries that schoolteacher it will be me-
The three other widowers heard Of
the plan, and each one said it was a
good thing and each one had his whis-
kers trimmed and his hair dyed and
made ready for the struggle. A SEM
mary was written to and teacher
sent on. 1t was for Whoever Thomas
to drive across the country in horse
and buggy to the railroad and meet
her and bring her on.
WidOwer Thomas had hopes that the
schoolma'a am would be about twenty
two and good looking. The arriving
teacher turned out to be all he had
hoped for. He felt so we'll acquainted
with her before they had driven half
a mile that he began:
"Now, Miss White, you are coming
among strangers, and l want to post
you about them. There's old Jim Will
liams to begin with. He's one of the
trustees and widower with four
children.
And there's Moses Burt. He's an
other widower. Claims to be forty
eight years old, but will never see
sixty again. Looking around for a
| young wife and ought to be ashamed
of himself Great hand to laugh at
his own jokes, but if you laugh with
him he'll sure think you are in love
with him and pop the question"
'"Then l shall not laugh"
''Then there's Joab Tyler Mebbe
he's only fifty next birthday, as he
claims, but he's sopping on the hair
dye to beat the band. Five children
for second wife to take care Of"
THAT'S dreadfulp'
'"Then there is Henry Stevens" con-
tinued the moderator. II can't say
that Henry is over forty years old,
and his wife only left three children,
but you can judge what sort of man
he is when l tell you that he never
shed tear at the funeral. He never
even SMILED. Seemed just as uncon-
cerned as if he was hoeing taters.
wouldn't advise no woman to marry
man like that
'"Then comes Levi Schemerhorn. He
was to Chicago once, and he'll brag
of it to you and try to make out that
he is hero. Don't you let on that
you think he's anything great or you'll
be goner."
"No, 1 WON'T" answered the girl,
| UuL are LueIC dLy
"Ahem! One more, Miss White.
It's me- I'm a widower with a hun
dred acre farm and only one child.
My later crop alone last year brought
me $500. Rising of forty is my age,
and l can run down a calf. Got
melodeon in the house and am willing
to buy red ingram carpet and lace
curtains for the parlor. In case I get
married l shall go on a wedding trip
to Niagara Falls and not mind the ex-
pense"
| "And are there no young men in the
neighborhood?" asked Miss White.
"Jest one. and he's hired man who
don't amount to shucks-eats with
his knife and fork and says that Bos-
ton Is in New Jersey. If I was you
I wouldn't let him get the idea that
you was a kindred spirit"
mo, I won't"
Miss White was left at the house Of
the Widow Hardness, which was to be
| her first boarding place. Supper was
not yet finished when the widowers
| began to gather. and in the course Of
Their excuses were various, but the
| fact was apparent that they had come
to size the schoolma'am up. Once
| there no one would go and leave the
others behind to get some advantage.
The clock had struck midnight when
the widow turned them all out in
bunch. There wasn't exactly a fight
outside the gate, but the six told each
other what they thought of hair dye
and old galoots. When they were
gone the schoolma'am turned to the
widow and asked:
Don't any Of those men want you
for q wife?''
"Not If they can get you," was the
doleful reply.