University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1911-03-07

yards is no longer mystery. Early
each morning, small negro boys can
be seen dropping large chucks of coal
from the car to the ground and then
putting them in sacks. About car
of coal is lost in this way during the
winter.
At a dance. Preoccupied Univer-
sity students in conversation.
He-That girl with the pale green
dress is about to loose her false hair.
She-You don't say. :.
He-I guess there are worse things
than that Did you see that fellow
she's with?
She-Well, I'll declare.
Held like to dance with her If
had a chance. Who are you watch
ing?
She-I think so. too. What did you
say?
He-Here l have been talking for
half an hour and you haven't heard
la word said.
She-I've been listening. You want
ed to know if had a dance with that
cute little fellow over there.
He-Excuse me for thinking yon
were inattentive. There goes a fel-
low who want to trade dance with.
l hate to break up the conversation.
Excuse me.
The girls reverie was unbrOken.
A junior prom notice had been
placed on re bulletin board in Aca-
demic Hall for students to read. On
the bottom of the card was printed:
mo cabs. No flowers" The usual
humorist, who seems ever-present.
added: There amt a-goin' to be
nothin' nor nobody"
A student in the University lost
reference book he had just bought. |
He could not find it and decided to
buy another The book had been mis-
laid and another student found it. He |
sold it to a book store. The student |
who lost the book bought another and |
found he had purchased the same book
The book was found in the Y. NJ. c. A.
Building.
The modern woman is not original
at all. Prof. Jane Fales, of Columbia
University, has discovered that rats"
puffs, and other headgear were IN
general use among the Egyptian wom-
en- 5000 years ago.
A student after graduation often
fails to get position because of lack
Of experience. He can not get the ex-
perience until he has the position.
In the process of natural selection,
which came first-the egg or the hen?
Two University women were trying
o identify girl acquaintance. The
rame could not be recalled. One OF
hem said:
"Oh, I'm sure you know her. She
wears light blue suit and"
"A willowy plume?" exclaimed the d
'ther. 4
"Yes, that's her." The girl was iden- n
fled. II
A Wabash official attended the dinner 9,
iven by the commercial Club, but h,
ould not stay it out and make connec- n,
on with his train. Wouldn't it have =.
cen retributive justice for him to 8,
DIT several HOURS a' 0en'ral'a |p,
When you see students Snowballing,
ont you experience creeping sensa- ~
on up and down the spinal column
5 you walk in front of them? -,
A Stephens College professor walked
ito a confectionery and studied a ~
Te-cent gumslot machine for several
inutes. The he guitily slipped a u'
lin in the machine He pulled the 'o
yer and nothing happened. y.
whats the matter?" asked the
"''
What was it you put in?" asked 81
q proprietor. pr
"A penny" u"
Its gone then; fell on the other n
le." replied the shop keeper. -,
well, isn't there any way to get it III
IT," anxiously inquired the professor. gu
The professor had plunged and lost. "'
A student of the University went to