davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Best Egg Layers.

.Chickens with short toenails are
the best egg layers" Prof. J. E. Rice,
Poultry expert Of Cornell university,
told students Of the Agricultural col
lege of the University Of Missouri.
"Chickens have short toenails.' he
said. "by continually scratching for
food. A chicken that is constantly
scratching for food is sure to be In
dustrious." The hen OF the olden time.
Professor Rice said. laid on an aver
age. only IS eggs year. The mod
ern hen Of pure breed viii lay from
100 to zoo eggs annually.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
WAGERED HIS LIFE AND WON
Canadian Restaurant Man Had Deter
mined Not to Live Life Of Drudg-
n cry After Stock Deal.

Hamilton. Ont.--With $4,000 at in
terest. made from q quick turn in
stocks, Joseph Sherbrooke. until re-
Gently small restaurant keeper here.
Is about to start on tour OF the
world. Had the market gone against
him he would have killed himself
rather than return to drudgery. In
going into speculation. he had decided
that life was not worth while unless
he could be in easy circumstances.
and he staked his all on the turn.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
BIRDS STEAL FAMILY WASH
Linen Handkerchief Carried Away
by sparrows and Used to Aake
Comfy Nests.

Gary, Ind.-Mrs. William Parry Of
Crown Point placed four handker-
chiefs on high bush to dry. An
hour later two of them were gone.
Mrs. Parry placed two other handker-
chiefs on the bush several days later.
and from the window In her kitchen
awaited developments.
The handkerchiefs had not been on
the bush FIVE minutes when two Eng
lish sparrows few down from near
by apple tree and bore the linen
away. When Mrs. Parry's son climb
ed into the tree he found the four
handkerchiefs fashioned into a cozy
nest
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
wlu Provides for Mule.

Memphis, Tenn.--In the will Of
John English, a Shelby county farmer.
provision is made not only for the
widow and a daughter, but for an old
mule on the little farm which Eng
lish owned. This clause directs that
the mule must never be ridden in
the night time and that the said ami
NAL, 80 long as 1t survives. shall be
properly sheltered and generously
fed.s
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Era s1a ,A,as AM EslljS / / I y
Rllssful Ignorance.

Holden, the New York birdman,
lately had in his shop a taciturn par
rot. Day after day it sat silent on
its perch, Indifferent to every ques-
tion. At last a Cuban lady came into
the shop and spoke to it In her native
tongue. The parrot frightened up at
once, opened its beak and emitted a
jubilant volley Of vehement Spanish
words. When the parrot finally
ceased speaking, the lady turned to
Mr.. Holden and blushing violently
asked:
"Do you understand SPANISH"
"No," he replied.
"Thank God!" she replied, and left
the shop.-Success.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Domestic Repartee.

Professor McGoozle was deeply alb
sorbed in the effort to take the tangle
out of a knotty point in metaphysics.
"Lysander. said his wife, looking
up from the paper she had been read
ing, whit does it cost to have ones
name changed?"
1t never cost you anything to have
yours changed, Alvira," /" irritably an
swered the professor. 81 paid all the
expenses. /"
The worm turned at last.
"That was no more than you should
have done," she snapped, consider
ing that / changed my name from
Vanderpoole to McGoozle. Chicago
Tribune.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Only a Story, Though.

Clement ]. Driscoll at dinner told
a number Of amusing stories about
his strenuous life as commissioner of
weights and measures last year.
"A friend of mine," said Driscoll,
noticed one morning that his grocer
looked very sad.
/" What's the matter, old MANI
my friend asked, jokingly. The
weights and measures man hasn't
been dropping in on you, ] hope?'
/" Yes, he has, snapped the grocer.
" But you don't really mean to
say exclaimed my friend, that he
caught you giving only 15 ounces to
the pound?'
" Worse than thatl' groaned the
grocer I've been giving 17l' -
Washington Star.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

They were a young couple and
talked in loud voices on account of the
rattle of the elevated trains. He was
not in a good humor.
II wonder" she said, "why the, al
lowances of money made to wives by
husbands are called pin money!"
II suppose, he explained GROSSLY,
"it's because it sticks the husbands. "
Popular Magazine.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

glad l did, for 1T has cured me.
II know of so many cases where wo-
men have been cured by Lydia e. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound that I can
say to every suffering woman IL that
medicine does not help her, there is
nothing that will. Mrs. JANETzKI,
1868 Arch St., Chicago, Ill.
This is the age of substitution, and
women who want cure should insist
upon Lydia i. PinkhaGs's Vegetable
Compound just as this woman did, and
not accept something else on which the
druggist Cal. make a little more profit.
Women who are passing through this
critical period or who are suffering
from any OF. those distressing ills pc
culiar to their sex should not lose sight
of the fact that for thirty years Lydia
K. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound,
which is made from roots and herbs,
has been the standard remedy for fe-
male ills. In almost every community
you will find women who have been
restored to health by Lydia L. Pink,
hams Vegetable Compound
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Cover Crop.

Land that has been cleared Of early
truck should be sown with seed OF
some good cover crop. Crimson
clover is the best crop for light soils
and mild climates, while winter vetch
is one of the best for northern sec
tions. Inoculation and lining are often
necessary to grow vetch. It is great
soil improvement crop when proper
conditions are provided.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Change of Menu.

SHdT6c " WcHus
Representative Gardner, of Massa-
chusetts, says the Washington Star,
apropos Of an immigration case he
had Investigated, said the other day:
"The trouble with this. immigrant
was that he didn't know what was
good for him. We are all more or
less like that. The things that are
best for us are the things that we
most dislike"
Mr.. Gardner smiled.
IA woman, he said, twas COM
planning about the depredations of her
dog.
"'Only yesterday, she cried, he
broke into the larder.
!" Dear me, said her interlocutor.
did he eat much?'
He ate, she replied, every
blessed thing except the dog biscuit. "
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Too Many Trumns.

81 have seen some very remarkable
whist hands, said one of the bridge
fiends in a down town club on Sat-
urday. "But once, about four years
ago, ] saw one man hold all 13
trumps."
"Why, that's not so extraordinary,
two or three players broke in all at
once, "that's happened lots Of"
"Hold on till I'm through. What
made this hand remarkable is that the
man who held it only took one trick. !"
"Nonsensel What are you"
It's fact. When he trumped his
partners ace first time round his part
ner got up and threw him out of the
window. ."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
NoxIous Weeds.

Keep down noxious weeds and do not
LET them mature seed on the lawn. It
is much easier to destroy the plant be-
fore the seeds are ready for distribu-
ton than get rid of the young plants
after the seeds have been scattered.
Do not let the weeds get start
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Startling indeed. .

A University of Pennsylvania pro-
fessor who is teaching in the summer
school is somewhat absent minded,
and when he is engrossed IL a s9bject
it requires the most startling state
ment to arouse him from his work.
After trying several minutes to gain
his attention visitor, who knows the
professor very well, leaned forward
and said quietly:
''Your wife has stopped talking"
The professor looked up.-Philadel-
phia Times.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Change and Rest.

"Hello, Bill, ;" remarked Market
street salesman as he met friend
yesterday in a lunch cafe, "where
have you been ? haven't seen you
for the last three weeks"
"Well," replied the vacationist,
wearily, "I'll tell you. I've been
away. Went on the recommendation
of my doctor. Seemed to be all run
down and wrong. The doc said Twas
nearly all in, had been working too
hard. He advised me to go to the
seashore for change and rest. ! did,
and here am. The boardwalk got
the change and the hotels got all the
rest"
He looked tired, and his friend be.
lieved him. Philadelphia Record.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

Stranger Have you a good hair
tonic you can recommend?
Druggist lin prohibition town.
Here is something that is spoken of
very favorably by people who have
drank it.--Puck.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Student of Human Nature.

Mrs. Carter and her cook, says the
Brooklyn Citizen, were discussing the
murder which had narrowed the dusky
citizens of the countryside.
will dey hang him fer KILN of
his wife, Miss Cyarter?"
I'VE can't tell yet, Aunt jimmy.
The court will decide. OF course, il
they prove he did it on purpose"
Done it a purpose! Law, Miss
Cyarter, in course he kilt his wife a
purpose! Honey, amt / done been
married? Don't l know men?"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
TRY BALL RLuINa.

The housewives friend on wash
day. Large package 10 cents. Blue
that is all blue. Once RED CROSS
BALL BLUE is tried, all others are
discarded.
There is a reason: Liquid bluing
is a weak solution of colored water,
while Ball Bluing is solid blue, clear
through. Price, 10 cents. ALL GRO.
GERS.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
rRy MuRINE EyE REMEnv

TRY MURINE EYE REMEDY
for Red. Weak, Weary, Watery Eyes
and Granulated Eyelids. Murine Doesn't
Smart-Soothes Eye Pain. Druggists
Sell Murine Eye Remedy, Liquid, 25c,
SOC, $1.00. Murine Eye Sclve in
Aseptic Tubes, 25c, s1.00. Eye Books
and Eye Advice Free by Mail.
Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

"Well, well, we'll, said the kindly
stranger, patting little Mollie on the
head, II suppose you are your papa's
little darling?"
II don't know yet, thir," lisped
Mollie. "The court hathn't dethided
yet. Jutht now I'm the pet of the
Matrimonial Fidelity & Cathuality
Trutht company, thir"-Life.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Mndarn Poultry housea.

Poultry houses built SO as to admit
the largest amount of sunshine and
fresh air should supplant the old time
air tight structures.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

dllu l. W6ub w tuo
store to get 6 bottle
of Lydia e. Pink
hams Vege ia BILE
Compound, but the
clerk did not want
to let me have it
he said 1t was no
good and wanted mo
TO try something
else, but knowing
all about it / in
sisted and finally
got it, and I am SO
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
turkeys Are cowards.

Turkeys are born towards. with ali
their braggadocio. and II conditions
are not agreeable at home they viii
stay away where they can be By them.
seIYea.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

May-You seem to prefer the beach
to the piazza.
Maud-Yes; ! prefer to bs burnt by
the sun than roasted by the gossips.---
Judge.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

Is your son out of danger yeti"
"No; the doctor is going to make
three or four more visits. Louis
vile Courier-J ournal.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

"Will you be miner"
eyes, till we are married"
"Till we are married?"
eyes, then you'll be mine. Toledo
Blade.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

Hamlins Wizard Oil is recommended
by many physicians. 1t is used in many
public and private hospitals. Why not
keep bottle on hand in your own home?
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Hoods
arsapariIla

Cures all humors, catarrh and
rheumatism, relieves that tired
feeling, restores the appetite,
cures paleness, nervousness,
builds up the whole system.
Get 1t today in usual liquid form or
chocolated tablets called Sarsatabs.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

DR.. Pierce's Pellets, small sugar
coated, easy to take as candy, regulate
and invigorate stomach, liver and bow
els. Do not grippe.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
SHE GOT
WHAT SHE
WANTED
This Woman Had to Insist
Strongly, but it Paid

Chicago, Ill.-"I suffered from o fe-
male weakness and stomach trouble,
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

Vhen the bowels are constipated, poi
ionous substances are absorbed into the
5oodinstead of being daily removed from
ihe body rs nature intended. Knowing
this dancer, doctors always inquire about
the condition Of the bowels. Ayers Pills.
s---slsds by the J. c. Aver Co.. Lowell. MAsst--
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

"Did your husband give you that
black eyer"
"No, my husband is in prison for
giving black eye to the lady who
gave it to me. "-P. !. P.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

Mothers win lad Mrs. wInslow-s Soothing
Syrup the best remedy TO use for their childrea
suring the teething period.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24

"How did you spend your two
weeks vacation?"
Recovering from sunburn the first
week and poison ivy the second. -
Washington Star.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Be Cured In Your O,Un Home
rheumatism, Stomach and

Rheumatism, Stomach and Cured pemnet and
Mng Troubles Skin Diseases Of concentrated mineral No Fake nd for
Address MOUNTAIN MINERAL COMPANY
Main Street
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-11-24
Tie Fountain Head Of Life q
Is The StomacbA


a andi and
wills ind
his whole
cienty nourshed E#
MEDICAL DISCOVERY VA
makes flow Of &#
di6esfiy skcs EW
ASSIMILATION perfect, The Hver ard
puriGes 6rea maker
restorative fonic makes
body, active in mind nd judgement
This Discovery eycerc roots
absolutely free from alcohol and a
ingredients printed its 1t has with
Its ingredient endorsed by in Of
medicine Don't accept secret nostrum substitute for
of
Dspen Medical Association " Pres Buffalo NJ Y
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

friendly rivalry to greater exertion. The broad
plans and policies of the parent company are
outlined and executed in the fulness of the COM
bincd experience of these men.
The product of these Companies includes 81
different models-cars designed for every need,
utility and pleasure vehicles, for passenger and
freight carriage. They range in price from
$3.50 to 5000.
0URselling organization embraces "a branch
houses and dealers everywhere. This
distribution not only enables us to dispose
of our product at the lowest selling cost, but it
permits US to provide service organization to
maintain these cars in the hands of owners that
cannot be duplicated by any other company.
And this organization is owned by upward Of
thousand stockholders scattered all over the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

THIS readjustment of values is the logical
result of the original plan, policy and ideal
to which the United States Motor Com
pany owes its birth. Patiently and persistenty
we have worked to this end-harmonizine,
organizing, specializing-always seeking to in
crease the efficiency of our organization, to i'm
prove the quality of our product-always with
the ultimate aim in view-the attainment of an
unquestioned leadership, because deserved
The United States Motor Company'is COM
posed o! II. constituent companes-each the
leader Of its class 1t operates eighteen separate
factories, with combined floor space of 40 acres.
1t employs IA 900 skilled artisans and a corps of
original investigators, the benefit of whose work
is shared by all the companies alike. The indi-
vidual genius which built up each successful con-
stituent company still directs it, but spurred by
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

results In one place, all work of this characters
done there.
BY cooperative selling it is possible for one fac
tory to sell in places where it would otherwise be
possible to sell only at prohibitivc cost. Not
only does this saving benefit the purchaser, but
the service that can be rendered to the owner
after purchase could not be given in this locality
by any other plan at any practical expense.
WE HAVE conducted this getting ready
" process persstenly and patiently, untrou-
bled oy temporary or local conditions in
the industry. While others were cutting prices
to dispose of old stock or leftover cars, or to raise
cash, we said nothing; we were not ready. We
have now reached the point where the fruit of
our effort can be given to the buyer without
sacrificing the interests of our shareholders.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

WYE MAKE profit at these new prices.
w Hadwe needed to unload we would have
announced them four months ago. We
have no leftover cars, no old stock to work up.
AS matter of fact, our shipments for three
months ending November 80 were SIX per cent.
greater than for the same period in 1902
The season for the heaviest buying Is now just
about to open. Over ninety-fve per cent. of our
product is already contracted for with deposits.
Every indication points to shortage Of our cars
this Spring.
Nevertheless, by basing our prices on a cost
which is lowered by legitimate saving, made pos
sible through the benefits of cooperative oreani.
cation, we are establishing our Company, now
and for all time in public confidence and earning
the support which VIC expect Away, to retain.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01
NEW AUTOMOBILE PRICES
Revolutionizing Motor Car Standards

ment of which was only possible
through the cooperation and
organization realized in the
formation of this company.
We manufacture one-fourth of
all the motor cars made in the
United States and one-sixth of all
the cars made in the world. We
control all our manufacturing
processes.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

country is operated on cooperative basis, with
all our employees working whole-hcartedly for
our success and sharing in our prosperity, while
the executive management is based on military
discipline. No one man, no clique, holds the
majority of the stock. Our stock can be bought
in the open market by any one, therefore
control. depends only on efficiency.
TN BUYING raw material we are able, by
massing our purchases, to secure lower prices
and maintain higher quality. BY interchange
of experience in our engineering department, we
avoid costly mistakes and produce better cars
Our original Investigations which produce i'm
provements cost little when distributed over our
vast product. An improvement in method is
introduced Immediately in all our plants.
1fparticular skill and cquipmentproducesbet better
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

THE United States Motor
Il Company announces a new
schedule of prices, effective to-
day. ThisannounCementap appears
to-day in the newspapers of forty
nine cities. The automobile
world the entire reading public
will be amazed that this an
nouncement, involving as it does
lower prices for 1911 models, is
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-01-01

made now on the eve of the
New York Show, which is the
signal for heavy buying of cars
to begin.
We therefore earnestly request
you to read every word on this
page. 1t marks the beginning of
a new epoch in motor car history
the establishment Of new
automobile Standards-the attain
The Holly chieftain., 1911-09-01
Union Pacific Retrenehment.

Denver.-Speculation is rife among
Denver railroad men as to the mean
ing underlying the retrenchment or
der recently issued from the office Of
the general manager Of the Union Pa
cific railroad whereby $500 employees
were Temporarily laid off," The or
der affected every branch Of the oper-
ating department, and although no
trains have been discontinued as q re-
suit. Of the order. train crews have
been reduced to the minimum. track
gangs are fewer, and yard employees
and shopmen are affected more than
any o'her branch.
The Holly chieftain., 1911-09-01
Government Takes Part.

Sulphur Springs.-The United States
government is prepared to step into
the fight between the water users Of
the Western and Eastern slopes over
the diversion Of water from the Grande
river to reservoir systems on the oppo-
site side Of the continental divide. The
diversion of large volume Of water
from the Grand might endanger the
Grand Valley project Of the govern
'ment. known as the High Line ditch.
is the contention. Ethelbert Ward.
deputy United States district attorney,
who is in charge of all the water ques
tions In which the government is In.
terested, has received word from the
Department of Justice at Washington
to file suggestions and notices in the
District Court at Sulphur Springs to the
efefct that the government Is interest.
ed in the subject Of water diversion.
The Holly chieftain., 1911-09-01
STATE A, NEWS
or INTEREST TO
ALL COLORADO
Western Newspaper Union News Services.
COMING EVENTS.

COMING EVENTS.
September 1I-ls-Deita County Fair.
September 11-1s-Fremont County
Fair. Canon City
September 12-15- Morgan County
Fair-Fort Morgan.
Sept. H-15-16-Annual State Reun-
Ion of Elks-Ouray
sspt. 1sc5i-Annual meeting Masonic
bodies of Colorado-Denver.
sept. 1S-23-Colorado State Fair
september 2l-Elbert County Fair
September ls-aa-weld County Fair
sertember ls-ss-western Slope Fair
Aontrose.
Sept. zl-31-Annuai meeting order Of
Eastern 6tar-Glenwood Springs.
Sept. z2-23-Knights Templar Con-
clave-Colorado Springs.
September 26-29-Las Animas Coun-
ty Fair rinidad.
September 25-30-Mesa County In
Gustrial and Fruit Association-Grand
September 2S-30-sedgwick County
Fatr-Julesburg.
SEPT. 2s-30-san Luis Valley Fair
AlamosA.
October 4. s. 8 and 7-El Paso coun-
ty FAtr-Calhan,
October 1920 - International Dry
Farming Congress and International
Congress Of Farm Women-colorado
Oct. l4-a1.-second Annual show.
Colorado Electric Club. Denver.
The Holly chieftain., 1911-09-01
Record crop Tor Rio alaneo. ].

Meeker-The heaviest dry farming
crop in its history is the enviable rec
ord this season OF Rio Blanco county.
A much heavier acreage than usual
was put under cultivation this year by
the dry farmers, which was sowed prin-
cipally to wheat, oats and alfalfa, and
now mesa. basin and bottom land
around Meeker in every direction for
miles and miles show fine results Of
the springs planting.