davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
GLOBE SIGHTS.
TFrom the Atchison Globe. ]

LF'rom the Atchison Globe.1
A harvest hand gets good deal to
eat, but he needs it.
Considering how little they know,
and they admit it, the doctors do very
well.
Something more than a wiIted collar
is necessary to demonstrate industry.
So f. as we are concerned, no one
needs to travel around with trained
parrots.
If the word probably" is to be al
lowed anyone can be a weather
prophet.
Investing in another mans pros
poets is a good way for the other man
to get rich.
What has become of the old-fash-
toned woman who had best clothes
for Sunday?
All a man gets for speaking well of
his enemies is the reputation of being a
hypocrite.
Japanese are small people, and nc
ZOO-pound woman is going to look just
right in 4 kimono.
One trouble seems to be that the
statesman who has the fewest ideas
knows the most words.
Still, il all the monologue artists
would confine their efforts to vaude-
vile, it would help some.
While VIC len CAD good deal. q m =
is of the opinion that they are never
quite ready to start
You may have observed that the
thoughtless child can think up a Iargs
variety of devilment.
Signs may mean different things
among them, the joy of a long breath
after the corset is removed
If you belong in the big leagues
that's where you'll land, unless youl
fool friends block your way.
| Fortunes have been made in chewing
gum, I'D some women work too hare
to increase the dividends in that line
Suspense Of waiting for the football
season 70 open doesn't crush as many
people = the college youth imagines.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
QUAKER 1iEDITATIONs.
fFrom the PhiIadelphia Record.

IFrom the Philadelphia Record-1
The more successful farmer is the
less credit he viii give to the weather
and the Lord.
The noblest thing about a wife is the
way she will keep on being one when
she has learned better.
A prett-- girl makes a fool Of a man
by appearing to give him chance to
make fool of her.
Religion is ike medicine-somethins
that appeals to a man when he ism
we'll and can't have any fun.
A man isn't necessarily a fool at SO.
but he might as well be for all the in
nuence he can have with men under so.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
POINTED PARAGRAPHs.
rFrom the chicago Post. I

Il EOAAt tic AA1ACd6O LOcLa
A corkscrew does the opening turn.
A surgeon looks for the worst there
is in a person.
She's wise girl who can analyze
her own complexion.
Unless man is alive to his oppor-
tunities he is a dead one.
There are times when a silent wit
ness is an unspeakable nuisance.
The more questions a woman asks
the fewer answers she remembers.
If a man says You're another be
means you are just as bad as he is.
From seven different angles there
are always six fools among seven wise
men.
And the average girl would rather
be a silly goose than an ugly duckling
If a woman has an ak to grind she
induces some man to turn the grind
stone.
When a man begins TO sympathize
with himself it's sign he has outlived
his usefulness.
The man who is down and ont
should go in and get the elevator
chauffeur to take him up.
Never bring the family skeleton out
of ITS closet for an airing when
strangers are present.
In stealing kisses, young man. he
careful that the girls mother doesn't
catch you with the goods.
Many spinster insists that she is
true to the memory of her first love
who was in the good-die-young class.
When you bump up against a man
who boasts OF his iron viii, an analysis
will usually disclose the fact that It is
pigiron.
After a woman has divorced ona
man and married another. the first or
feels as an old doll looks when tts
owner gets new one.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
HUAqOR OF THE Day

Mrs. Nagleigh: I suppose you are
satisfied now that you made a mistake
when you married me? Nagleigh:
Il made mistake, all right, but I'm
not satished.-Boston Transcript.
Eyes, I'm saving for house" "I
can't save any money. How do you
manage it?" ''By getting my wife to
go without things. She thinks we're
saving for an automobile '-LouisvilI
Courier-JOurnal.
eyes," said Mrs. Blunderby, my
boy Willie has been through all the
alimentary schools" "Alim entary -
questioned the caller. "Oh, see; you
are going to make a food specialist of
him. Boston Transcript.
Somewhat Superior Young Minister:
No, dear lady; frankly, cannot per-
suade myself that 1t would be safe to
let women vote. And what may
ask, is your. reason for opposing it?"
well, dear lady, I cannot but think
make them, let US say-a little-er-
er-masculine." "Oh, I don't know.
It has never had that effect upon the
clergy. Life.
Mother Ito child who has left play
mates in park): Why have you left
the others? What do you want, dear?
Little Girl: I've come here because
Elias SO agglavetin' Ca pause). At
least, she will be when she finds I've
broken the leg off her new DOLL
Punch.
Unexpected.-Plato Weetz Cat cheap
lunch counter): Do you come here Of
ten. Cutter Pye; Same as you do
when I think I'm going to meet any
body I knoW.-Chicago Tribune.
my husband" remarked the caller,
'is always interested in some kind of
'ology." MY husband isn't" said Mrs.
Lapsling. "but he has 'em just the
same. He suffered from the neurol-
ogy last night so bad he couldn't sleep
a wink. Chicago Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Captain Fabroni, of the caribeeners
Of Naples. an organization which APP
pears to be about as effective as the
Boy Scouts, has testified recently that
the Camorra is the great crimina
association the woT has ever known.
And from their antics at their trial, the
ringIeaders Of this gang appear to have
missed their vocations. They would
shine as real stars in the slap-stick
comedy of vaudeville or frothy musical
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
PROTECTION or room FISHES.

1t is to be hoped thar congress. at
the next regular session, will be pre-
pared to take up the question of en-
forcing the system of uniform and
common International regulations for
the protection and preservation of the
food fishes in international boundary
waters Of Canada and the United
States, as prepared by the Interna-
tional Fisheries commission, pursuant
to and under the authority Of the con-
vention of April Il, 1903. between the
United States and Great Britain.
writes Henry Mann in the July Column
bian. These regulations. if carried
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

James Whiteomb Riley's presenta-
ton of a 500. 600 site for a school Ii
brary and administration building for
Indianapolis is a laudable bit of phil
snthropy- Had he distributed volumes
of his poems to that value with a dis
corning hand among people who can
not afford to buy them, he would
have given much more joy to hui
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
Er1Ta, LEASED WIRE REa OPT
tcaFF TTIE ASSOCIATIVE PRESS
ronrrs NEws Willie away.

Subscribers of the sta te Journal
mSyav from home during the summer
MAY have the paper mailed l regularly
--s.R 5sv 10 sanv address AT the rate OF
zen oenfs q week or Thirty cents
month (by mail Only). address
changed as often as desired. White
ont az town the State JOURNAL will be
TO YOU Ike daily letter n pm nome
Advance payment is r lquested on
tI,ese short time subscripti pms, TO save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Just why Jack Johnson did not cut
more of a. figure with his fifty suits of
clothes at the coronation of King
George and queen Mary may be ex
planned by an announcement of an
English magazine for July that among
the colored nOtables present on this
great occasion were the C1aekwar OF
Baroda, the NaharaJa Holkar of IN
dore. His Highness the Aga Khan. the
Begun of Bhopal and the Maharaja of
Pafiala
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Free speech is one of the inalien-
able rights of the people of these
United States. But that's no excuse
for number of the United States
senators taking such excessive advan-
tage OF their prerogatives in this par
ticular, and especially on a measure
like the Canadian reciprocity bill
which is almost certain of passage in
its original form despite the volume
of protests that are made against it
for personal political purposes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

It's already apparent that the
charges that President Taft improper
~ assisted in the alleged grab Of val
liable public lands on Controller Bay
are without foundation. They were
evidently made for no other purpose
than to provide a little political thun-
der for the Democrats. But these ef-
forts have fallen flat
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Even if Ethel Barrymore Colt de-
cides to drop her divorce proceedings
and kiss and make up with her hus-
band she has been a big winner in
the matter of getting a lot of free
publicity and notoriety which is so es-
sentiaI these days to keep even the
best of actors in the limelight.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Topekans have also had he realiza-
ton forced upon them that; the close
proximity of storm and ra IN clouds
does not necessarily mean that it is
going to rain soon in this locality.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Another era OF high prices on he
necessities Of life in the food stuff line
appears to. be at hand. It VIII take an
ingenious argument, indeed, to blame
these increased prices on the tariff law
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
PARCELS POST.

The New York World insists that the
best way to regulate and reduce ex-
press charges is to establish the par
cells post. For years past there has
been a persistent outcry against ex-
tortionate express rates and gen
eral popular insistence on remedy
through the provision of a general
mail delivery of parcels; but the ex
press companies, aided and abetted by
railway managers pecuniarily interest
ed in the maintenance of the present
system of parcels delivery, have been
so strongly represented in congress as
to be able tc defeat any remedial leg
islation.
The inquiry set on foot by the in
terstate commerce commission will no
doubt bring about some relief, either
voluntary or compulsory, at the
hands IF the expresses; but there will
be no adequate general system until
the government shall make parcels de-
livery u part Of the function of the
postoffice department. That would at
once create a competitive minimum
charge for service, leaving the field
open, as now, for swifter or more Sc
cure delivery for larger parcels
Philadelphia Record.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Mountaineers in the south are
probably much wrought up with jeal-
ousy over a development in New York
city. A couple of mOonshiners' stills
were seized in raids in the metropolis
which were larger than any that have
been operated in the mountain caves
Of Kentucky. Tennessee and the Vir-
ginias
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Thus does an erstwhile hero and
olondam public idol get back into the
Hmelight. Consuelo, Duchess of MARI
borough. is going to build her home
in Washington across the street from
Admiral DeweY's house.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Madame Emma Eames has just
struck another note in her matrimon
ial register. This time she has taken
unto herself for a husband a famous
baritone. And in any rows that may
develop in this new family all the
singing need not be on one side
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Harry Kemp, the hobo poet. of Kan
sas. announces that so many people in
Lawrence know him he is going away
TO seek. secIusion. And then he takes
particular pains to give out. the de-
tails of his itinerary.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Mr.. Dayhoff, who wa thrown out
of the Kansas City work house, is try
ing to get back. However, as some of
us may recollect. this is not his first
effort to break into jail.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

The old one about Papa's pants be-
ing cut down for Willie isn't in it with
the report from Hutchinson that a
mothers cuticle has been grated onto
her child Now some cheese will
break out with a song about Nam
mas skin will soon fit baby" etc.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14
KELLOGG AND HIS FEE.

Why all this fuss about the $4,000
that Frank b Kellogg drew from the
government as special counsel in the
prosecution of the trusts? 1t is a
goodly sum. to be sure. but is it to be
expected that any lawyer of ability
and standing will go before the courts
and fight the battles of the govern
ment without being well paid? He is
obliged to pit his wits against the
cleverest lawyers in the country who
are retained by the trusts
What the country would like to see
would be ten men of the capacity Of
Mr.. Kellogg acting for the government
in its suits against oppressive combi-
nations. It would be worth 1920, 600
to the country to have 10 cases against
| combinations that are alleged to be
illegal tried and settled. The Treasury
can well afford to pay literally for
special counsel and it is pretty small
business to make a row about it
Boston Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Among the startling news items Of
the past few days. kindly reserve an
aisle seat for the report from Los AM
geles that the McNanaras had plead
ed not guilty.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

The Home is confronted by many
hard propositions, but the hardest of
all is making q small boy believe that
table manners should be observed
when there is no company present.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Say "ping-pong' to any unmarried
girl. and she will say: "Oh, yes; that
game they used to play when I was a
Little Tot
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

When the home team wins a game
and the weather makes Z change for
the better in one day. Mere Man,
widely advertised as wanting but lit
tie here below" should cease to
crouch for few moments.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Maybe w. E. D. Stokes DID go to
the girls rooms after letters, but as he
is millionaire, everybody grins when
they read that part OF his testimony
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

A genial soul" is usually one who
enjoys life at the expense of others.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

M|E|!Ea|I ||llA
Among the startling news items Of
the past few days. kindly reserve an
aisle seat for the report from Los An
geles that the McNamaras had plead
ed not guilty.
The old one about Papa's pants be-
ing cut down for Willie isn't in it with
the report from Hutchinson that
mothers cuticle has been grated onto
her child. Now some cheese will
break out with a song about NAM
mas skin will soon fit baby" etc.
When the home team wins a game
and the weather makes 4 change for
the better in one day. Mere Man,
widely advertised as wanting but lit
tie here below" should cease to
crouch for a few moments.
Mr.. Dayhoff, who wa thrown out
of the Kansas City work house, is try
ing to get back. However, as some OF
us may recoI1ect. this is not his first
effort to break into jail
A genial sour is usually one who
enjoys life at the expense of others.
Say "ping-pong'' to any unmarried
girl. and she will say: "Oh, yes; that
game they used to play when I was a
Little Tot
Maybe W. E. D. Stokes DID go to
the girls rooms after letters, but as he
Is a millionaire, everybody grins when
they read that part Of his testimony
The Home is confronted by many
hard propositions, but the hardest of
all is making q small boy believe that
table manners should be observed
when there is no company present.
Western Kansas preacher had to
quit job because the drouth put the
farmers on the fritz ana they couldn't
pay his salary. 1t appears that instead
of retaining him to pray for rain, they
took a chance that it would rain some
time anyway.
Kemp the tramp poet. left Law
renee because he wanted to find soil
tude. Which goes to show that Kemp
is mighty particular about his soli-
tude; the brand that hangs over Law
renee would satisfy any but crank on
solitude.
Hired girls are scarcer than Har-
mony in the Republican party, but one
may acquire a household assistant
at $40 per week, four afternoons off
and the use of the piano
Now that a majority OF the Kansas
papers have used, as original, that
stuff about the summer of 1920, and
the rainfall of June. 1911, it devoIves
upon this department IA, write some
new weather dope worth copying.
But we can't think of anything
worth while today.
Hep
-HGP-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Western Kansas preacher had to
quit job because the drouth put the
farmers on the fritz ana they couldn't
pay his salary. It appears that instead
of retaining him to pray for rain, they
took chance that it would rain some
time anyway.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Mrs. Nagleigh: I suppose you are
satisfied now that you made a mistake
when you married me? Nagleigh:
/ made a mistake, all right, but I'm
not satished.-Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Kemp the tramp poet, left Law
renee because he wantel to find soIi-
tude. Which goes to show that Kemp
is mighty particular about his soli-
tude; the brand that hangs over Law
renee would satisfy any but a crank on
solitude
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Hired girls are scarcer than Har-
mony in the Republican party, but one
may acquire a household assistant
at $40 per week, four afternoons off
and the use of the piano.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-07-14

Unexpe Weetz Cat cheap
lunch counter): Do you come here Of
ten. Cutter Pye; Same as you do
when think I'm going to meet any,
body I knoW.-Chicago Tribune.
The Harlowton news. [volume] (Harlowton, Mont.) 1909-1914, 1911-09-08
-. One of
'HarI0Wt0n's
Leading
Industries
PREMIUMS PAY FAIR TRIP

Ever since the State Fair was
started there has been a number
of enterprising farmers and or
chardists who have killed three
birds with one stone. BY setting
aside their best products and ex-
hibiting them at the fair, they
have rot only won substantial
cash premiums, but as we'll, have
advertised their respective com
munities, achieved a reputation of
being progressive and wide-awake,
and have enjoyed a weeks vacation
without cost, their premium
money covering all expenses.
This year they will have keener
competition. More counties will
have displays this year than
in the history of the institu-
tion, and there will also be more
individual displays. Space has al
ready been reserved for the fair
the last week in September-by
twenty three of the twenty nine
counties. Displays will come
from Lewis and Clark, Broadwater,
Meagher, Beaverhead, Madison,
Gallatin, Park, Yellowstone, Car
bon, Rosebud, Sweet Grass, Gus
ter, Dawson, Chouteau, Fergus,
Musselshell, Teton, Cascade, Flat
head, Lincoln, Missoula, Granite,
and Deer Lodge.
If you have some likely looking
stock, farm products, or any of the
things listed in the State Fair
The Harlowton news. [volume] (Harlowton, Mont.) 1909-1914, 1911-09-08
HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF

1t is a record of sound and salts
factory achievements which the
democrats offer to the country as
fast as the first fruits of the power
and responsibility intrusted to
them. There have been no mis-
takes, for fortunately the resolu-
tiOn providing for the election of
senators by the people, which we
look upon as mistake and folly,
was buried in the conference com
mittee. Thoughtless partisanship
is welcome to whatever capital it
can make by pointing to the small
number of measures enacted in
this session, but sOber-mindcd re-
publicans will not fail seriously to
consider the respective positions in
which the parties are now placed.
Their own party is divided, as the
votes of the session show, and the
division is serious and alarming,
upon the question of the tariff,
just as the democrats in congress
and in the country were divided in
1893 upon the question so resolute-
ly pressed by President Cleveland
of the repeal of the silver purchase
act. Out of that democratic divi-
sion there came to the republican
party the heritage of power they
have not since relinquished except
in the present house. The demo
Gratis, ON the other hand, are
again united party, united under
competent andtrus ted leadership.
Republicans may form their own
conclusions as to what republican
division and democratic unity por
tend.-New York Times.
The Harlowton news. [volume] (Harlowton, Mont.) 1909-1914, 1911-09-08
MONTANA STOCKMEN DUPED

Aberdeen, S. d., Sept. 3.-At an
examination held before William
Wallace, United States commits
sioner, H. II. Tilley, proprietor OF
the Dakota Hide and Fur company
of Aberdeen, arrested on a charge
of having used the mails to defraud
was bound over to await the ac-
tion of the federal court. Tilley
will fight the charge.
1t is claimed Tilley advertised
in the Dakota Farmer of Aberdeen,
the Stockgrowers Journal of Miles
City, Mont, and other farm and
secular publications, asking farm
ers and ranchers to send their
hides, furs and pelts to him, assur-
ing them they would be paid the
highest market prices, or if pre-
ferred he would make up the ma
terial into beautiful robes and rugs
or harness leather and return tt
them at a minimum of expense.
1t is charged by the government
that the alluring advertisements
of Tilley drew a large patronage,
but that many of his customers,
after shipping the goods, failed to
hear from him either in the form
of a check for the hides, pelts OF
furs sent, or by the return of the
goods manufactured into useful
articles as promised.
Among the complainants are E.
f. Shields of Selma, N. d., who
sent two COW hides; r. e. Freebe
of Baker, Mont, who sent 11C
Continued on last page.)
The Harlowton news. [volume] (Harlowton, Mont.) 1909-1914, 1911-09-08

catalogue, it would be wise thing
to send it to the fair. If it wins
no prize, it will at least show the
owner where it needs improving,
and then the quality can be bet
tered which means more dollars
than the inferior article would
bring.
Intending exhibitors should con-
suit or write the member of the
state fair advisory board from
their county. G. w. Cook whose
postoffice address is White Sui
phur Springs, is member from
Meagher county.
The Harlowton news. [volume] (Harlowton, Mont.) 1909-1914, 1911-09-08

While helping Fred Carlson in
moving the city bastile last Satur
day Frank Lunsford had the mis-
fortune of getting his right foot in
the way of one of the rollers with
the result that he had to call on a
doctor to fix him him up, having
his toes badly mashed.