The Washington times., 1911-04-09
PALMER REPORT ON
/. PAYROLL OF HOUSE
AMAZ|NGDOCgMENT
Many Receive Big Salaries
for Work They Cannot
Find to Do.
Continued from First Page)

| CONTINUED from First Page9
two telegraph operators. They date
4 back so far into medieval time that
nobody knows when they secured at
ltachment to the salary list. Anyhow,
! they never died, never resigned, never
were displaced-and have never done
| any work within the memory of men
now alive. They happened thus:
| Many years before the telephone was
invented-recollect how comfortable we
all were before wires got crossed and
central got cross and the wire was
busy-call again?'-a private telegraph
line was installed between the War, De-
partment and the House wing. Two
operators were provided for this wire.
The telephone came along, and no
body used the telegraph any longer.
The operators didn't say anything about
| It, and 1t never occurred to anybody
to to ask what they did for their wages.
They just drew their salaries. and drew.
! and drew, and drew. They got 81. 400
! apiece, which seemed good to them. The
Palmer committee had the outrageous
| and now they are going to- be compelled
TO learn the Morse code again and do
real work. .',' '.' ''
Away back in 1895, according to the
PaImer committee
| INVESTIGATING the archives, the clerks
document room of the House was
abolished. With it were--or were in
tended to go-all the employees and
officials thereunto appertaining.
Disregarded the Law.
But the clerks document room was
a good thinGS too good to be allowed
to expire thus ignominiously. 1t de-
cIined to be abolished. 1t went right
on functioning and drawing its sal
aries. These amounted to $3.50 a
year, according to the Palmer report.
Nobody every undertook to enforce
the abolition act; the salaries for the
various jobs were audited and paid
just as II there had been no such fool
law.
But at last the law is going to be
enforced, provided Congress is pow
erful enough to do II. Some fine
Capitol Hill a death grapple between
the United States Government and
the clerks document room. 1t will
decide which is greater-the Govern
Thus far all winnings have been on
the side of the c. d. r. Betting is
now slightly in favor OF the Govern
ment, but nobody is very confident
that it can actually abolish a job
that somebody wants.
LeaIouSly lendlng space.
Long before the magnificent Ii
brary of Congress palace was built, |
the library occupied a section of the |
Capitol. When the new building was |
opened. the library section was re-
modelled and cut up into office rooms |
for Senators and Congressman. On |
the directories of the building. these |
office rooms are always located as in |
The NOl0 library Snach'
1t seems that when the library was |
in this old section there were attend |
ants carried on the House payroll |
When the library moved away these !
attendants didn't go along; they be- |
longed in the House, not to the libra
ry. They were at a loss what they |
should attend. with the Library gone, |
but they sapiently decided to attend to
the space-and to drawing their salaries |
They have been doing that ever since
People with such upholstered snaps
as these OF course never got overwork-
ed. There was no excuse for dying, no
incentive to quit, no chance of getting
other Jobs that would pay so well for
so little work. So the incumbents vert
right on incumbing; but they will in
cumb no more. They are on Mr.. Pal
mer's little list.
Palmer Unsympathetic.
Mr.. Palmer is a cold, hard, steely-eyed,
person who doesn't care
any more for somebody's else snap than
he does for the left lobe of his cere-
bellum.
The committee found that two night
were charged to the folding
room of the House. There are seventy
four policemen on duty at the Capitol,
and the committee, for the life of IL,
figure what these two night
watchmen watched, unless it was the
police. So it was decided to risk the
police. The committee considered IL
ong and diligently, and decided that
4 anybody came along and carried off
the police while they weren't watching
t might not be such a bad idea, any
now.
On this point there is difference of
opinion. The night watchmen feel that
he policemen need watching. The
however, learned that the
police have so little tc do that they are
put to it for spending the time.
Arrested for Whistling.
1t is said that a policeman from Ten
1essee recently arrested a man for
in the corridors. He was
Yankee Doodle" This
'aused much concern among the North
srn wing of the party, and presently a
Maine policeman grabbed a man from
louisiana for whistiing. Now, whistling
8 irregular and subversive of the rules
Specially so when a Maine policeman
hears a Louisiana man in a broad
soft hat whistling Dixie"
The committee thought the police were
'verworking their ingenuity keeping
busy, and ought to be required to watch
So the two night watch
nen will be abolished, and if the police
men get stolen. why. it'll be their own
aClt.
Altogether the Paluer committee man.
OPd Ion nff in fhe HnnSa SarNrina l i
lone. these amounts:
saving under Speaker 232oOo
;aving under clerk. 39, $4,000
,aving under sergeant-at-arms.. A. 70oO. %