davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
FREAKS OF ELECTRIC STORM

During recent storm which swept
over Wyalony, Australia, flashes Of
lightning caused many startling acct
dents. A young girl, Belle Melville,
had rather unpleasant experience.
The lightning struck a glass Jet neck
lace, which she had in her hands and
also dislodged the hairpins from her
hair She was stunned for some time
and suffered considerably from shock.
A somewhat similar experience befel
Miss Grace Gerard. The young lady
went out Of doors with an opened box
of matches in her hand. The whole
of the matches became ignited and
her hand was severely injured.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
PICTURE ON A CRAB SHELL

An ordinary crab shell, upon the in
side Of which appears the c1ean-cut
bust picture Of a woman, is curiosity
now on exhibition In the rooms of the
fish and game commission in New Or
leans The shell was sent to the COM
mission by Oscar Angelo, game war
den Of Lafourche parish. The face is
said to resemble paintings of Queen
Marie Louise, consort of Napoleon
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

he had to wait for his wife to finish
dressing to accompany him to court.
The minutes spent by Belly in but
toning his wife's waist up the back
and in waiting for her to get her hat
on straight before the two boarded a
car down downtown, would have cost
Belly and his bondsmen heavily had
not Judge Dyer relented, after Belly
explained, and set aside the forfeiture
of the bond.
Thus was it evidenced that even a
Jurist may have an appreciation Of a
husbands predicament when wife has
to be "buttoned up
Belly's failure to put in an appear
ance in Judge Dyer's court at 10 a. M,
when the verdict of the jury was to
be announced, caused great excite
ment in the court ROOM Rumors that
Belly had fed we're current
Judge Dyer, when ten o'clock had
passed, ordered the bond forfeited
and an attachment issued for Belly.
Before this action could be taken,
however, Belly walked into the court
room with Mrs. Belly The latter was
securely fastened up the back and
wore her hat at perfect angle.
Belly's explanation Of the cause of
his delay created ripples Of merriment
throughout the court room and every
body appeared satisfied when Judge
Dyer set aside the forfeiture of the
bond.
The verdict of the jury finding
Belly guilty of attempting to extort
$1,000 from Esselbrugge by threaten
ing letters, was then read. Judge
Dyer deferred sentence.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
SHERLOCK HOLMES
Has A REAL RIVAL
DETECTIVE WILLIAM j. BURNS is
WIDELY KNOWN AS THE
"NEVER FAIL"
FAMOUS SECRET SERVICE MAN
Gained Much Fame When He Ran
Down Elusive counterfeiters for
Uncle Sam-For Is Years He Has
Successfully Tracked Criminals.

Los Angeles, Cal.-William ]. Burns,
better known rs BILLY" Burns to Sc
cret service operators and detectives
all over the country, and whose most
recent claim to fame was the arrest Of
the Mcnamara brothers and Ortie Nc.
Manigal for the long series OF dyna-
mite crimes throughout the country,
is an Ohio product. He was formerly
cutter In a tailor shop at Columbus
Something over 80 years ago Burns
earned modest stipend as cutter in
g tailor shop at Columbus, where the
uniforms for the police of that city
were made. John e. Murphy was chief
of police. He and Burns became great
friends. Often when Murphy had a
hard case he would talk it over with
Burns. After the police had worked a
week on murder case Burns criti.
cised the methods employed. He told
Murphy the men worked on bad lines.
Murphy suggested Burns try his hand
and the suggestion was promptly &C
cepted. One week later Burns landed
the man and secured a confession.
He was taken from the cutters bench
and made detective. and while he
was there made his name a terror to
criminals. After a short experience
he went with an agency at st. Louis.
Later he became connected with the
United States secret service and ham
died with marked results great mass
of important work William P. Hazen
was chief Of that branch of the treas
ury when Burns was called into the Of
fee during the '98s and shown an al
most perfect 500 Monroe head silver
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
BUT T0NING UP WIFE
NEARLY COSTS $1,000
ST. LouIsAN, DUE IN COURT, DE
LAYS HOUR TO HELP SPOUSE
AND LOSES BOND.

st. Louis. arduous task of but
toning his Wife's dress almost cost ia,
cob Belly of Walnut Park SIG minute
and he devoted so minutes to mad.
ame's toilette-in the United States
circuit court of st. Louis.
Belly was found guilty of attempting
to extoft 81 900 from Frederick Essel-
brugge, a wealthy North st. Louis mer-
chant, by BLACK Hand" methods. His
bond was declared forfeited because
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

Residing In little French town
and still plying his trade of tailor is
Pierre Chanel Roy, who is believed to
be the only man now living who saw
Napoleon Bonaparte. Roy not only
saw the great emperor, but was once
carried in his arms. He Is one hun
dred and four years old, but still quite
hale and hearty. Needless to say, his
favortte topic Of conversation is Napo-
leon, beside whose portrait he is
especially fond of sitting in leisure
time
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
Who She: Was.

Well" laughed squiggles, some
men never know when they are
snubbed! That lady you just spoke
to was about as distant as they make
'em In her greeting. :.
We'll, why shouldn't she be??' re
torted Jabbers. She's distant rela-
tive of mine.''
BY marriage?'
.sNo-by divorce. She got rid of me
at Sioux Falls back In -Har-
per's5 Weekly.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
AnxiousIy Waiting.

Il do hope things will take turn
for the better soon. If stocks would
only go up!''
why, have you been investing IN
stocks, my dear?'
mo, but father has promised that
he would buy me a duke as soon as
A. G. & w. touches 12O.''
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
BY the Harem Code.

do you think / am really your az
fnity?" Solomon's nine hundred and
eighty-ffth wife asked, coquettisEly.
"My DEAR" the Wisest Guy said,
you are one in thousand"
He got away with it, too.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

The arrow gun here photographed
is used by certain savage tribes in the
interior of the Philippines The ma
chine will hurI bamboo arrows, whose
tips are painted with poison, for sew
eral hundred yards. Many American
soldiers have lost their lives from
wounds received from these arrows,
which are usually fired from ambush
in tree tops and branches.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
IT'S THE "ARMADlLLov NOW
The Latest Thing in Women's Hats
That Has supplanted the
"Ding-a-Ling."

Chicago. The Armadillo," that's
the name Of the new headdress for
women that has supplanted the Ding
a-Ling" bonnets. THE Armadillo" is
to be had in different shapes of coarse
straw. The name probably comes
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
Chinese Educational puzzle.

1t is generally recognized that China
has set to work at the wrong end OF
her education problem. China
has begun at the top. has tried to
establish universities without prepar-
ing students for them, and all the low
er rungs of the ladder are SO badly
constructed that it is almost impos-
sible for the student to mount by
Unconstitutional Review. Shanghai.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
"When a Wife is Cruel"

The husband rushed into the room
where his wife was sitting.
My DEAR" said he, excitedly,
guess what! Intelligence has just
reached me q
The wife gave a Jump at this point,
rushed to her husband, and, kissing
him fervently, interrupted with:
well, thank heaven, Harry
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

A man can get along without doing
much if he has sense enough to know
what not to do
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
Join in War Against tuberculosis.

Join in War Against tuberculosis.
From statistics published in the
new tuberculosis directory of the
National Association for the Study and
Prevention of tuberculosis it is as
certained that over 900 cities and
towns of the United States, besides
about 100 in Canada, are engaged in
the war against consumption, and that
on April LIST there were nearly 1880
different agencies at work in the cru
SADIE, an increase Of nearly 700 per
cent. in the last seven years.
The new directory lists 421 tuber-
culosis sanatoria hospitals, and day
camps; 511 associations and commit
tees for the prevention Of tubercul-
osis; 342 special dispensaries; s.
open air schools; SO hospitals for the
insane and penal institutions, making
special provision for their tuberculosis
inmates; besides giving an account
of the anti-tuberculosis legislation in
every state and in about $50 cities.
The new directory is sold by the
National Association for the Study
and Prevention Of tuberculosis, los
East Twenty-second street, New York
city, at cost price, so cents postpaid.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
CURED ITCHING AND BURNING

I was taken with the itch In April,
1904, and used most everything. /
had friend pay me a visit from
Cumberland, and she advised me to
use Cuticura Remedies which I did.
The cure was certainly quick, and
use them to this day. / had it terri
bly, under my knees. ] only used one
box Of pills, but two boxes of Cuti-
cura Ointment, and use the Cuti-
cura Soap all the time. / hope this
will benefit others, as it has me, after
DR.. and others could do moth
ing for me-" (Signed) Miss Lu John
son, 1923 Ninth St., N. W., Wash
ington, D. G., April 8, 1910
In later letter Miss Johnson adds:
"The trouble began with an eruption
under my knees, and extended up
wards toward my waist, until I was
not able to sit down. 1t kept con-
slant itching and burning all the time,
night and day. I went to my doctor,
but he could do me no good after /
do not know how many medicines he
gave me, and then told me I would
be compelled to go to skin special
list, which positively refused to do. I
cried all the time. Finally I made
up my mind to try Cuticura Rem
edies, and tried Cuticura Pills. Oint-
ment and Soap, and was entirely
cured Of the itching three days after
I started using them. The healing
took about eight days. / consider
Cuticura Remedies marvellous, and
would recommend them everywhere"
Cuticura Remedies are sold through
out the world. Send to Potter Drug
& Chem. Corp, Boston. for free book
on skin Affections.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17
FrightfuI.

They say she looked daggers at
him?"
Worse than that. She looked long
hatpins"
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

The chief secret of comfort lies in
not allowing trif1es to vex us.-sharp
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

photograph
standing beside This trunk
is 1o1s high
making there used 1870 feet OF timber
of lining 50 pounds
gallons h.
The Donaldsonville chief. [volume] (Donaldsonville, La.) 1871-current, 1911-06-17

The herb laxative, Garfield Tea. prompt
iy overcomes constipation, biliousness,
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

innocent face, led Little Saucer-eyes
straight to the taffy-covered sofa pill
low. like lamb to the mint sauce.
Percy sat carefully down on the
sugar-coated pillow, and Tacks, hardly
able to suppress his emotion, shrieked
hoarsely: I'll tell Sister you're here!"
and went madly on his way.
But Tacks didn't tell Sister" He
ran out in the dining room, put his
head under a rug on the floor, and
choked for five minutes.
When Sister" entered the parlor,
Tacks was among those /"also pres
emit"
The taffy had taken kindly to
Percy's lavender panties.
Percy arose to Greet Clara j., and
with him arose that yellow soft pill
low, clinging TREMENDOUSLY to a back
ground of outraged lavender trousers.
Clara ]. was a brave girl. She
longed to take the lid off a laugh that
would startle the neighborhood, but
she was polite enough TO renig. So
she stood there, biting her lips, while
Percy bowed and bobbed, and every
time he bobbed the soft pillow went
up In the air like the wash on a line
on a windy day.
Won't you sit down. Mr.. Jones?"
Clara J. said, sweetly; then in swift
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

Miss Clara said | could have this one.
so-er-er-that is, took 1t. Fad Of
mine. don't you know"
Indeed" said Mamma We'll, 1t
must be rather awkward to carry the
bottle of mucilage that goes with that
fad. Good night, Mr. JONES'" and
with this she brushed by and left him
on the ice.
Percy stood there living picture
entitled Down and Out"
He hadn't friend In the world ex-
cept the soft pillow, and that stuck
closer than a brother.
His checks were all in, and he had
just made up his mind to leap
through a window, call a cab, and
say ITO the morgue, drive fast!"
when Tacks jolted him back to life
by saying: Here's Pops old over
coat On your way, quick. Send the
pillow home by express and all will
be forgiven"
With something akin to joy in his
heart, Percy dug up dollar, gave it
to Tacks, and said: Little man,
you've saved my life-bless you, bless
you! Tell your sister I leave town
tomorrow morning very early and may
be gone for seven years."
Then Percy and the sofa pillow
went under the overcoat. and the
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14
John Henry $
Courtship
By GEORGE v. HOBART

aside: "Tacks, leave the room!"
But Tacks wouldn't go-not for
priceless gems!
Percy proceeded to part his coat
tails before doing Society droop, and
in that manner he grew wise to the
airship attachment In the rear.
An expression of wonderment crept
over Percy's face, and with much de-
liberation he started to pry off the in
cubus.
Then something ripped. 1t wasn't
the sofa pillow.
Clara ]. was painfully embarrassed,
and Tacks was busy taking care of
series of internal spasms.
Percy began TO back up. Presently
he hit a small table on which rested
a costly bit of bric-a-brac, and over
went the whole plazazus with a smash
on the floor
Percy gave Clara j. the frightened
fawn eye and started to gather up the
shells from the floor
When Percys shoulders went
down, quite naturally the pillow went
up In the air, and then Clara col
lapsed.
Tacks was under the sofa biting
holes in the carpet.
Attracted by the crash. Mamma and
Papa cut in. They stood in the
door and watched Percy digging for
broken bric-a-brac with a sofa pillow
clinging gayly to his southeastern ex-
tremity. He looked like an animated
Japanese lantern.
1t was too much for Papa. He
gave Percy the boot and ducked.
Mamma teetered over to Percy and
said "Oh, it doesn't matter, Mr..
jones'" and then she took puff at
the pillow.
As she did so Percy sat down on
the floor with bump that shook the
block, and it was even money who
was the most surprised. Mamma or
Percy.
Clara j. had left the scene OF battle,
and Tacks was out in the hall pray
ing for power to laugh just five min
utes longer
Percy arose painfully. So did the
sofa pillow. Mamma eyed them both
suspiciously.
Il beg your pardon, Mrs. Van
vivver!" said Percy, and with both
hands behind his back he took an
other yank at the evil.
"R-r-r-rip!"
Percy stood up and Mamma ex-
claimed: Mercy on us!
Its a mere nothing, | assure youi"
said Percy.
Wont you re-seat yourself?" asked
Mamma, politely.
I'm afraid I'll have to when this
comes or" answered Percy mourn
fully.
81 fear ! don't quite catch your
meaning" said Mother, and now her
signals were out for cold wave.
Percy blushed and said THE fact
is, Mrs. Vanvivvier, I'm making a col
lection of sofa pillows-new fad,
don't you know. Awfully jolly sport
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14
Calendars

We are showing the finest line of Christmas Novel
ties including notices. calendars and unique designs il
folders and art goods shown in Central Michigan
Hundreds of designs in prices ranging from Oc to 81 OC
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

Seven of us were entered In the
race for Clara Us affections, when
determined to get out my saw and do
some heavy ice-cutting.
The other six were society shines,
and every time | dropped into Clara
Us brownstone | found one Of these
pale boys draped over a sofa, making
gurgles with his voice, and handing
out Fiji glances to my own particular
Pattern of Dress Goods.
1t was cruel
Something kept whispering: John,
get your brush and paint finish for
these polishes!" so finally | went
after them.
Percy Acton Jones was my pet
aversion.
Percy was short and fat, and when
he talked he used blonde voice.
Percy used to be a dramatic critic
on one of the mail order journals, and
he had the reputation of being able
to throw the hammer farther than
anyone else in the Knockers Union"
Percy rejoiced in the fact that he
was safe from the retributive slap,
because when an actor or an author
whom he had toasted went after him
for the purpose of handing him one,
Percy would always pull a frown
down over his fat little forehead and
exclaim: Aren't you the rude thing"
In soprano-then II was all off
Clara j. rejoices in small brother
whose company name is Thorndyke,
but the family call him Tacks for
short. Tacks is eight years old, sharp,
and hard TO sit on. | was his hero,
and IL only cost me four dollars, most
ly in nickels.
So, with the aid of Tacks, | formu-
lated finish for Percy Acton Jones
that was beautiful to the limit
| had often noticed that the parlor
of Clara Us camp was threatened
with rush of sofa pillows to the cell
ing and one of these saffron-colored
sit-down-easys gave me an idea.
| took Tacks into my confidence
and explained my plan. Tacks didn't
like Percy. In his estimation the Jones
party was a stout parcel of heated air,
and Tacks was eager to be up and do
Ing MIN.
At a candy cave | bought pound
of saffron-colored molasses taffy and
had it rolled out fiat and square, so
that 1t would just about cover the top
of a soft pillow.
Tacks was with me, going and
coming, and when we reached home he
went through the basement and let
me in the front door. felt as nerv-
GUS as an unopened Jackpot, but we
finally introduced the saffron-hued
taffy to the yellow sofa pillow and
placed It carefully in the chair most
affected by Percy.
Then | left Tacks on guard and
gumshoed away like Raffies, the busy
burglar.
When Percy rang the bell that eve
ming the door was opened with a sud-
denness that made him gasp, and
Tacks. with a heavenly smile on his
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

whole package made rush for the
door and freedom
He never came back.
When | sauntered in a half hour
later | overheard Clara j. saying to
Tacks: Here's a dollar, you little
imp. Now. don't you dare tell John
Henry" /
The next day gave Tacks another
dollar for not telling me.
There was only one way to get rid
of the other FIVE saucy ones who sat
around and spilled words In Clara Us
parlor, and that was to induce her to
walk down the church aisle with me
until the minister stopped US. -,
SO | framed up line Of talk that I
thought would be strong enough to
make her look up the market quota
lions on freshly picked orange bios
SONS 90.
| figured 1t out that all had to
do was to talk my lines and the girl
would swoon at my feet With
speech like that the part would play
itself-there was nothing in it,
But luck wasn't with me.
Unkind Fate gave me the double
cross and my hoodledoo was working
overtime.
For two weeks | was out on a side
track with my strong speech locked
up In a cold storage car.
The trouble was that the old folks
looked upon me as one of the family
to such an extent that every evening
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

No more useful or acceptable pres
ent could possibly be give than one
of our HooSier Cabinets. They are
built from selected materials by skill
ed artisans, who have used their brains
as we'll as their hands in building
these labor saving, Step-Saving Cabi-
nets. No matter what kind of kitch-
en- or arrangements you may have,
they will tighten woman'S work in
the kitchen. Gust whisper to us and
we will set one aside and deliver it
Christmas morning.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

spread him as he watched tie pro-
gress of the play The girls took
their parts like finished artists and
gave such a naturalness and spon-
taneity TO the whole affair that it was
a JOY to behold.
We are informed that they are
going to give another play, and that
very soon, No one can afford to
miss it. so watch for the announce
ment OF the time and place
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14

Clara Us Papa used to float in the
parlor and cut ice for hours at
time, while Mamma sat in the rock
ing chair and made faces at herself
in the mantel mirror
II was a fight, and there was a tie
up in the wedding bell business, but
won out
Clara Us father is Wall street
broker-retired. Every morning for
20 years he went into the street
and came home at night with hat
full.
He used to throw what he made
In the cellar, and when the cellar
wouldn't hold any more he got mad
and quit bringing 1t home.
One evening | brought Papa
book entitled An inexpensive Way
to Get Rich" written by a chap who
Is visiting friends in the poorl house
Father went out in the dining room
and started to read the book to
Mother, and she went to sleep
Here was my golden opportunity
and | cashed in.
led Clara over TO a dark corner
and began to talk fast.
Clara j." | said. for weeks and
weeks I've been waiting for a chance
to place your tiny mitt in mine AND
give it the silent squeeZe-take that!
Through all the waking hours of the
day and through the lonely stretches
of the darksome night | think of you,
only you, beloved - look into my
lamps and you'll see I'm not kidding
you, Are you next, little one?"
Clara J. nodded.
This was the opening scene from
nay strong speech, and it seemed to
be hit all right; but perhaps | wasn't
swallowing my palate and getting
nervous Well, maybe,
Listen, Clara il braced and
began to push the lawn mower again
-"sincs time immemorial men have
knelt at the feet of beauty and-er-
er-I say. since time immemorial ken
have melt at-er-"
The wheels were slipping and had
no sand.
Il say. Clara j., since time MINI
mimimorial ken have belt at the meet
of-that is to say, ben have felt at
the keet of-er-er-"
Back up" said she very softly. and
my life was saved.
IL was the first time | ever heard
her use fancy phrase, but she had
timed II just right. 1t brought me
back to earth as no other words could.
Isn't she the wise little gazaboine.
though?
discarded my strong speech and
got right down to cases
Clara j." said, months and
months ago your image moved into
the only furnished room in my heart,
and now | want to collect the rent
are you wiser"
Yes" she said, and her head
dropped a little lower
II was out" / went on. ito hand
you one OF those long, ready-made
speeches. full of moonlight serenades
and peeping stars nesting in azure
skies, and soft sentences tied up i'm
a true lovers knot, but fell down
in the first lap and had to cut it out.
Now, the point is this When can I
grab you by the southpaw and lead
you off to minister's, where togeth.
er we can hear the brides sing?7
For a moment she was silent. then
she looked up and said ever SO sweet
ly: It's up TO you'll"
The next minute-well. it's none Of
your darn business
Copyright by G. w. Dillingham; Col
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1911-12-14
Alpha Theta Play.

Every one remembers what
treat the Alpha Theta girls gave the
college and town, when they pre-
sented their play last year in the
chapel No one has forgotten the
delightful spirit of merriment which
prevailed it. Every one felt his
cares and worries roll away as if
BY magic and a general glow over