Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1911-09-07

m Just miserable" sighed Mar
jory, and know I'll never be happy
again"
What's the cause of all this woe?"
asked her friend Polly. sympathetical-
iy. Tell me about it,"
That's the reason l rushed over be
fore breakfast" said Marjory. "If
didn't confess to some one 1 would
die Such load on my conscience"
oh, case of guilty conscience.
How many hearts has the heartless CO.
quette broken this week." asked Polly.
Worse than that, Polly, I've killed
man.
Heavens" screamed her friend.
What do you mean? Explain"
We'll, | haven't exactly killed him
outright, but the doctor says he is in
critical condition"
Who is he? Come to the point and
don't keep ME in suspense"
We'll, since I've lived at this board
ing house I've been kind of lonesome
like, so yesterday Jane Darwin came
over and stayed all night with me.
About four in the morning | was
awakened by strange noises in the
hall. shook sleeping Jane into con-
seriousness and whispered Burglarsn
We both sat erect in bed, breathless
and listened
We shall be murdered in cold
blood groaned Jane, while /, with my
usual impulsiveness, jumped out of
bed, grabbed the alarm clock and
tung it through the transom, smashing
the glass in thousand pieces.
And you nearly killed the burglars"
gasped Polly.
No, If he had been really truly
robber | wouldn't have cared; such
a deed would have been heroic. But
there was no burglar. My alarm
clock hit a perfectly innocent fellow
boarder who was doing nothing more
than entering his room, which unfor-
tunately happened to be next to mine.
He had no business to stay out
until four in the morning. 1t served
him right" stated Polly.
He was returning from business
trip, new boarder. The room had
been vacant so long l completely for
got it belonged on the map of Mrs.
Persimmons select boarding house.
We'll, he happened to be hand
some broad-shouldered splendid
young man. And, oh, Polly! that hor-
rible alarm clock hit him square on
the head and knocked him senseless."
Il guess it knocked the clock sense
less, too, for its alarm started to go off
and think it's going yet.
The noise Of his fall, the ring of the
clock and my screams brought the 40
boarders rushing to the scene of d.
aster
"And their negligee costumes were
positively indecent. If it weren't
tragic it would have been excruciating
ly funny to see old Mrs. Tops with
her wig in her mouth and holding her
false teeth to her head
"They carried the poor man to his
bed. called the doctor. and here l am
worried almost frantic Suppose he
should die? So good looking, too"
you poor dear" said Polly. Il can
imagine your anxiety, but brace up.
know he will soon recover and forgive
you your unwarranted attack Of as
sault and battery"
About four weeks later Polly said
to Marjory: "By the way. how is
your burglar friend?"
"He's just splendid" answered Mar
jory sparkling with enthusiasm
Then his head was not seriously ia.
jured?"
mo, his head is better. but-but he
claims the blow affected his-his-
heart"
"Marjory Morton, you are blushing
furiously. What does it mean?"
when Chester mean Mr.. Ford,
was convalescing l felt 1T my duty to
help him while a1'ay the tedious hours,
being that it was all my fault. Living
under the same roof, naturally We saw
quite bit of each other-see?
Then was sorry for him. He was
sorry because | was sorry, and-well-
you-see-you Know guess you I'M
derstand"
ooh, Marjory: how romantic. I'm
so happy, and IT'S all on account Of
an slarm clock"
Yes. Chester says he's going to
wear that alarm clock for watch
nh q M, aftor this laI,ohod Mariory