davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe.l

IF'rom the Atchison Globel
Worry has made more men great than
Incidence.
Then there are men who confuse indie
pendence with impoliteness.
If a man has mean disposition, his
family is pretty apt to find it out
A loser never finds as much consolation
his brave conversation infers-
Slang probably prevents many people
from learning the English language.
While the axe seems quite effective in
kin rows, it is a terribly mussy weapon.
A man is pretty busy when he can no
longer find leisure to devote to pairing his
corns.
Only few train robbers, however, have
steady work before they get to the peni-
Tertiary.
Some men seem to have almost as much
fun earning money as others have spend
ing it.
When a mans stomach rebels, his no.
ton of riotous living is to eat sausage for
breakfast.
we like variety but not too much of it
in one dish, as in some salads we have
encountered.
Unless he has grudge against human
ity, an ex-soldier doesn't favor large
standing army.
just judge is apt to give one side the
worst of it: that is what one side is fire.
uuently entitled to.
This is also the season when people are
trying to induce the helpful hen to post
pone her vacation.
Some men kick themselves when they
are down. but there may be something
easier than for a rich man to get richer.
1t is hard to make a suffragette believe
the reason some men don [ want women to
vote is that they. like them so well.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Mr.. Frank Hitchcock (bachelor), who
is postmaster general. and Mr.. john
Barrett, (bachelor) who is director
general of the Pan-American Union,
had a -to-heart tete-a-tete on the
advantages and disadvantages of
matrimOny-
by the way. Frank said Mr.. Bar
rett, Il suppose with you, as with me,
every time you pay the slightest atten-
ton to a young woman you are i'm
mediately reported engaged or about
to be married"
yes, John" said Mr. Hitchcock,
gravely They naturally think that
at last we have capitulated, and that
our lonely bachelor existence is to
end
They seem to know just how we
feel about it, don't they?'' said Mr..
Barrett. ''You know I've been i'm
pressed with the fact that you and 1
have the same ideas on the subject.
That's probably why we are both
bachelors
but ] just heard of you going to be
married" ventured Mr.. Hitchcock. Il
heard the same about you answered
Mr.. Barrett There's nothing in it,"
was the dual answer. I'm too busy to
get married" said Mr.. Hitchcock.
ssSame here" said Mr.. Barrett. THE
reason you and 1 have remained bach
elors so long
But the conversation here was inter-
rupted by a bellboy-
ssMr Barrett" he said, there's a
lady calling you on the telephone
washington dispatch to New York
Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
AYHAWKER JOTS

All doubt that the winter season is
approaching is removed by the an
nouncements in the Kansas weeklies
that Blind Boone and his concert are
making their annual tour through
out the state.
Coming close. The BuckIin Banner
reports that one of the high school
boys while translating Latin recently,
instead of reading 1.-THE deeds of great
kings are not always good,'' he. read:
THE hre-pans are not good enough
for the king"
A Copper Rivet'' from the Bucklin
Banner: Most people do not realize
that temperance is applicable to eat
ing. exercising, working, loving, talk
ing, laughing, singing, dancing, read
ing, and all human pursuits just as
much as to the drinking of ardent
spirits.
An interesting query from the
Havana correspondent OF the Burlin
game Enterprise: If a half dozen or so of
Havana farmers, with their guns and
dogs, would go into town and tramp,
drive and shoot around on private
property, we wonder what would hap
pen next?
A high school note in the Scott CITY
Republican; Prof. to Freshman: NOW
each of you draw a picture of what
you wish to be-" Immediately all be-
gan drawing earnestly except one
bright young lady. Prof Miss, why,
don't you know what you want to be ~
Student. ooh, yes; but don't know
how to draw it. Lwant to be married"
Related by the Pratt Union: A
small girl went up town Saturday
with her mamma and when they re-
turned she said to her aunt, I'VE
were at the meeting house.. Her
mamma saidss'.kNby, no. we didn't go
to- church, The child responded
with: 'sWell, / know it, mean the
place where grandma gets her meat
The Chicago postoffice has notified
the newspapers of that city to dis
continue printing puzzle piano ads.
and declares that papers printing
such ads will be denied transmission
through the mails. Thus, comments
the Minneapolis Better Way, is the
prospective buyer to be denied the
right to accumulate a lot of 100 cou-
pons to apply on $50 piano.
There can be no doubt about IT.
Editor Graham, the photographed ex-
pert Of the Kansas Farmer. believes
in keeping his clientele hot-footing 1t
to the dictionaries In one of his re-
cent inimitable editorials he spoke of
the .stal1romachy Of life,,'' and con-
Guided the next sentence with a dash
and "Arnageddon.' This is certainly
passing out something exceedingly dis
tinguished in the way of words.
A man told the Oak Hill Gazette this
story the other day: Once a farmer
shipped cattle to Kansas City. The
railroad took so much time in getting
the stock down there, they were in
very poor shape, losing him money. To
get even with the railroad the man
didn't do a thing but walk back home.
One of the wise men at Cottonwood
Falls hid $40 in a cook stove for safe
keeping. Result: His wife, while homo
alone, started a fire in said stove and
the $50 went up in smoke. To the Oak
Hill Gazette, the obvious moral to this
tale is that "only a bachelor should
hide money in a cook stove
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
oUAKER AIEDIrATIoNs.

IFron the Philadelphia Record
In poker a bad deal often costs good
deal.
Some people butt in without any ifs OF
butts.
A ringer FOR someone else-The teIe-
phone girl.
AIS well that ends well. to the man
who begins right.
You can't tell. from the shallowness OF
a mans mind. how much he can drink.
It's a woman's privilege to change her
mind, but she generally gets such small
change for II.
Hoax-"His conversation was most abb
sorbing." Joax-''What was II about?"
Hoax-"Sponges-"
Regret for the mistakes OF our youth
doesn't always prevent US from making
those OF our old age.
--Henpecklxe boasts Of being "a
man OF few words" Wagg-'"That isn't
boast. That's a confession"
The time was long past midnight.
What was that terrific noise upstairs
darling2" exclaimed the nervous young
man. 4 think II must have been papa
dropping a hint" she replied
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
YER TLSLNG Talks

When I came to New York. twenty
years ago, the Cammeyer Shoe store was
campaign. In those days its business was
advertised Ike every other business-bls
headlines, announcements Of unusual vail
ues, reduction sales, etc, all OF which was
regarded as perfectly legitimate.
During the lifetime OF Mr.. A. j. Cam
meyer the founder OF the business. this
death the business was bought by Louis
NJ. Hart, who had been manager OF the
store for many years.
Mr.. Hart had his own ideas about adj
vertising, and when he assumed control
of the business he carried out his ideas.
About year ago he met young man
Mr. r. j. Goulston-whose advertising
methods appealed to Mr.. Hart. and he en-
gagged him as the agent to prepare and
place the copy.
A tremendous change has been wrought
in the business through an advertising
policy which tells the people frankly about
the merchandise offered. The business
has grown more rapidly in the last year
than il grew for ten years before, clearly
demonstrating that human-interest advor-
tising-the kind that is like a friendly let
ter between a business and its customers
is the kind most appreciated by the GUS
toners.
Recently the Cammeyer store put out a
page advertisement which was unusual
in more respects shan one. i have never
known, in the tWenty-siN years I have
been in the business, a store TO tell Its
customers how much business II did the
year before-how many pairs OF shoes it
sold, and to give such a frank straight
forward friendly talk as was given In
that page
Now. there are those who criticlse this
kind OF advertising, but when IL is taken
into consideration that this kind OF adver-
Using, followed persistently for a little
over a year. has put the Cammeyer Shoe
Store in position where it is doing more
business than fl ever did in its history
doing IL more Observation-Disclosures
greater measure OF satisfaction to Its GUS
toners than ever before-thats the an
swer to all criticism.
The personal, friendly tone In advertls-
ing will add to any stores business.
Cro be continued.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
HUNOR or TEE Day

so you want the privilege OF voting for
people Of whom you approve?'
mo" answered the suffragette ct de-
sire the satisfaction of publicly refusing
to vote for people whom / don't like
Washington Star.
Seaver-I have to tell that boy OF mine
where everything is.
Weaver-Have to tell him where the
baseball grounds are located, where the
circus is showing, or where the best
swimming-holes are?'-Judge.
Guest-Ee seems very nice young man.
What's his profession?
1Tostess-He's a social botanist.
Guest-And what Is that pray?
Hostess-Oh, we invite him especially
to give attention to our wallflowers.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
Uncle-I hope you've been good boy.
Tommy.
Tomrny-Wel. no. haven't.
Tncle-Dear,s deari hope you haven't
been very bad
Tommy-M'no, Just comfortablei-Lon-
don Opinion.
$50 he refused 10 let you marry his
mo: but he imposed conditions that
cannot comply with"
What they2'
said I'd have to go to work first
Louisville Courier-J ournal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

few vigorous strokes took him to the
side of the sinking boy. There WAS
thrilling scene in the water, then
both were safe on shore, with Mar
garet lowering over her brother.
Maurice's fiuttering eyelids opened
at last, and he whispered that he'd
soon be all right. Treasured as to
the boys condition. Margaret turned
her grateful eyes to his rescuer.
How can ever thank your she
exclaimed.
Il don't want your thanks" Dick
answered boldly. II want-you!"
The rosy flush of dawn seemed re-
nected IN the girls cheeks as she stood
Tor moment with downcast eyes.
RMS is no sudden DESIRE Dick
continued earnestly 1T has been the
greatest thing in my world since the
first time I saw you You remember
that glorious EVENING""
He was standing close beside her
now, his dark eyes seeking hers. As
she slowly raised her dropping lashes
Maurice, whom they had both quite
forgotten, sprang up with a whoop Of
delight.
Congratulations" he exclaimed.
i m off for that fishing tacklei'
The color deepened in Margarets
cheeks as she drew from Dick, ex-
claiming: Whatever does the boy
mean:
'Neve- mind himi'' responded Dick
regaining his former position. Lets
talk about something more interesting
Let's talk about-usi', -( Copyrighted,
1911, by Associated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
Good sense in Late Marriages

Figures showing a rate of but one
divorce in fifty-Seven marriages Of
college bred women as compared with
a rate of one in twelve among non
collegiates, are interesting, but. they do
not warrant the conclusion that col
lege diploma is an insurance policy
against marital disappointment and
unhappiness. Without casting any re-
Elections on the college girl, who, If she
has improved her opportunity, ought
to have developed in character and
judgment as well as in knowledge of
books. it probably is true that women
who have came to maturity under
home influence and have been etu-
Gated in the science of sweeping and
making beds and the arts of whole
some cookery and household admins
tration can show a percentage of sue
cess in marriage equal to that of the
cOllegiates.
The Inference which more properly
may be drawn from these college sta
tistics is that the late marriage, which
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
PoINTEp PARAGRAPHs.
[From the Chicago News.I

IRON the Chicago NeWs.J
It takes a bachelor to think that he
understands women
Sometimes a man who flatters gets even
with girl who flirts-
Apologies are perfectly satisfactory-to
those who make them
In order TO become a nuisance you have
only to hunt up a grievance.
Talk is cheap. Give us the silent lady
on the silver dollar every time.
Once in a while an actress surprises her
press agent by making good
The love that survives six months of
married life may be the genuine article
coat of paint may conceal the age of
a house-but not the age Of d woman.
bald man doesn't want the earth.
Give him bottle of hair restorer that
Will restore, and he'll go on his way re-
joicing.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

is more likely to be the deliberate
choice of long association and court
ship, the union of matured minds and
fixed characters, possesses the greater
element of permanency- The man and
woman are, and should be, wiser than
the boy and girl. This is reminder
that the most effective divorce reform
begins with a reform of marriage laws
and customs. and. one of the needs in
this direction Isl for more effective
barrier to irresponsible child mar
riage.
A fault of present American So
c1ety, in more than one of it's phases,
is that it is abandoning boyhood and
girlhood, and sometimes infringing on
childhood in making premature men
and women of its infants.-Philadel-
phia Bulletin.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Jumping at conclusions usually lan5s
one in an undesirable puddle of some
sort.
The man who tries to please all the
people fas attempted an impossible job.
x
There is progress in everything these
days except in the pronunciation of or
iginal Jokes.
X
Too many people put too much stock
in the applause they get. Much of it
is not sincere.
A clever clothing salesman never
fails to tell his customers that tlles,
have magnificent chest development.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
TAKE HEART.

All day the storm and wind has blown
From off the dark and rainy sea:
No bird has past the window flown
The only song has been the moan
The wind made in the willow tree.
This is the summers burial time;
She died when dropped the earliest
leaves,
And, cold upon her rosy prime.
Fell direful autumnS frosty rhine
Yet am not as one that grieves.
For well I know DER sunny seas
The bluebird waits for April skies;
And at the roots of forest trees
May flowers sleep in fragrant ease,
And violets hide their azure eyes.
0 thou, by winds of brief o'erblown
Beside some golden summers bier
Take hearti Thy birds are only flown
Thy blossoms sleeping, fearful sown,
To greet thee in the immortal year,
Edna Dean Proctor, in the National
Magazine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
ny THE WY

Society note from washington; Pau
line Wayne Taft has returned nome
after a visit with friends in Wiscon-
sin.
Speaking Of today's news today, etc.
the Morning Gourd made the discos-
cry this week that four children were
born in Topeka on July 4. We believe
in printing the news before it gets cold.
but such unseemly haste as the N. O.
displayed in this instance Is almost
indecent.
To entertain sn adult sized Jolt u
neuralgia for several hours is bad
enough, but to have Friend Wife sus-
gest that it is probably an attack OF
rheumatism, and then have IL dawn
on you that rheumatism is a bone at
fection-that is verging upon the limit
OF course a paragrapher ought 10
write something funny every day, just
as the show comedian says something
funny every day. but the paragrapher
is up against a slightly different pro-
position. joe Jefferson said something
funny nearly every day for 80 years
but he played only three parts in the
whole time.
AS a whole, we care very little about
the Chinese war, but have growing
curiosity to know how they manage
to send kilograms in Chinese without
kinking the wires.
Senator Joe Bailey. OF Texas. has
decided to retire to private life. In
his determination he is not liable u
meet with any serious opposition on the
part of his constituents.
The darkest hour is when you can't
find a match.
Job for the purity league: Trees arc
now making almost indecent exposure
of bare limbs.
A lovers jealousy is a compliment,
but husbands jealousy is an insult
The pretty girl who has to work for
a living has great natural advantage
over her less-favored sister in the same
circumstances. It is but human to
cuss the 10-year-old dollar alarm clock
for its failure TO deliver the goods. ana
at the same time pet a gold watcn
ana expand its cash value in repairs ev-
cry year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Some strong but nonetheless peril
nent language from the Philadelphia
Records: 1t was time for President
Taft to turn eastward on his coast-to-
coast trip when the dynamiters began
an offensive demonstration. Against
that explosive form of argument the
rule of reason offers no effective an
swer. The miscreants and sneaks, who
make war with dynamite should be
hunted as wolves and tigers are hunt
ed. There is no safety for other men
as long as they go free and are able
to ply their diabolical trade.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
[From the New York Press.I

[From the New York Press.I
A man lends money on faith; he borrows
it on nerve
The reason a girl isn't afraid OF big
man is she is of little mouse
Being engaged can take more of the
average mans time than being married.
When woman manages to run the
house on half the money she needs for it
her husband thinks he does it
A man won't stay home nights if there's
nobody but his wife, because it's dull and
if she has family VISITORS because it's
rackety.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

''Votes, votes. votes-votes, votes
votes, votes. votes. votes This is the
official woman's suffrage yell, in case
you should happen to hear it. But it
does seem that so many clever women
in such a righteous cause could have
turned out something better, that is. if
they needed any such thing as a yell.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

''Select a good-hearted cabbage -
begins writer of cooking recipes. And
one of the dyspeptic editors of the Bos-
ton Transcript means: ''Alas! that a
good-hearted cabbage has never come
our way. Those we have had any deal
1ngs with have treated us cruelty, very
crueIIv indeed
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Reports have it that rebels in Mex
leo are working at their trade and have
burned another railroad station as an
incident to their depredations. Reb-
els against what? The new govern
ment that was established by their
brother rebels? Or are they merely
guerillas, pillaging and plundering for
their personal gain ? The latter is more
likely the case.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

The unusually large attendance at
the annual convention OF the Daugh-
ters of the American Revolution is
explained by the big fight that was on
over the presidency of the organiza-
ton. Women enjoy a good scrap even
better than most men.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Tt occurs to the Chicago Tribune
that it surely Ought not to be a re-
pugnant task for every good citizen of
the country to comply with the apple
growers modest demand and eat five
apples day until further notice. Re
pugnantI No, indeed! 1t is merely a
financial impossibility, thanks to the
cold storage bins
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Mayor John K. Sague. of Poughkeep-
sic. n. Y, has evolved an excellent
plan for solving the tramp problem IN
his town. Hereafter all tramps who
apply to the police for lodging, and are
accommodated. will have to pay sor
their accommodation the next day by
helping clean up the city. He who re-
fuses to work. Will be arrested as 4
vagrant and take chances of being sent
to the penitentiary.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Leaders of the Chinese revolution
have issued an edict that all Cinnamon
within their power must cut off their
queues or they Will lose their heads.
And it would be just like some of the
Celestials to prefer TO lose the latter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Noble mani Booth Harrington has
high praise for his wife who is suing
him for divorce But it falls rather
flat in view Of the fact that he did
not think enough of her to retain her
respect and admiration.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Mr.. Underwood says that almost
any man the Democrats may nomi-
nate for president can be elected in
1872 And, who pray tell. does the
distinguished southerner eliminate with
that little word almost
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Mrs. Booth Harrington has sued her
husband for a divorce 1t seems that
famous authors are quite as difficult
for women to get along with as are
famous actors.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

The Choctaws are being advertised
as the worlds richest Indians. This is
great news for the clever rogues who
are so adept in separating the redmen
from their wherewithal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
on THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Is Topeka going ahead? oh. no; not
at ALI Only sixty additional blocks of
new street pavement are going to be
laid next year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

watch out for foulsI Mr.. Lorimer
is to have his inning this week before
the congressional committee investi-
eating his election to the United States
Sanafa
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Maybe the court was acting out of
kindness when it decided that DR..
Hyde's attorneys cannot examine the
Swope viscera- The Swope viscera is
getting pretty old.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

The Managing Editor of this paper,
who has probably not read all of the
previous chapters, he was too busy,
like many of the rest of you, said this
morning that we could have a whole
column about those alleged "Reminis-
cences' today. if we wanted to, so far
as he was concerned, as the worlds
baseball championship was settled in
the State Journal last night and in this
mornings Capital. and he and the 9TH
er baseball fans saw mighty little real
news ahead for today's paper.
Not on your life said the writer.
You forced US over onto the inside a
few days ago and it has been discov-
cred that the inside is just about as
good as the outside, so we don't want
a column of your first page space
where you imagine you are always
putting your best news The writer
happens to know that sometimes the
best stuff in the paper is not on The
first page. but Is on the inside of the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

n. By the way, look out for
LENA undt Loui'' in tomorrow's State
journal. in colors, said to be the best
comic running, also the latest. News
stands should order early.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

AS a whole, we care very little about
the Chinese war, but have a growing
curiosity to know how they manage
to send kilograms in Chinese without
kinking the wires.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-27

Society note from washington: Pau
line Wayne Taft has returned home
after visit with friends in Wiscon-
sin.