davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03
HUMAN BOATS.
Swimmers Who Used to Rig Them
selves With Sails.

selves With Sails.
When you throw Il piece of wood int
the water and watch how nicely il
floats. has 1t never occurred TO you tC
make yourself into boat and to &c
floating about as easily and coolly as
a real boat does?
This may sound very queer, but to
one who has confidence in himself II
Is quite practicable. as was proved
many years ago by a DR.. Bedale of
Manchester This gentleman. a noted
long distance swimmer. was often to
De seen floating about the river Mer-
sey for hours at a time. He used to
fasten a strong belt round bis waist
and attach to It light mast and sail
which he could furl or unfurl as he Law
comfortably on his back, and no doubt
1t was very enjoyable.
This was carried a step further nv
another noted swimmer. Captain Boy-
ton who used to ttdnk nothing of sail
ing up and down the English channel
clad In dress inflated with air and
with a sail fixed to his feet. Once.
indeed. be actually crossed the chan.
mel from Dover to Calais. but on this
occasion be used a paddle with which
10 steer himself.-Pearson's Weekly.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03
DR.. Bells Pine Tar Honey

Viii. break up the worst cold and al
eu.lao shrdl rdlu mrdlu dlu lu luuu
lay throat irritation. This remedy
quickly cures coughs, colds, grippe,
and all throat and bronchial troubles.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03
Cheap limitations

Owing to the immense sale and pop
ularity of DR.. Bells Pine-Tar-HOHI
there are many cheap limitations q
the market under similar sOundi4
names, but you can always get ID
genuine by looking for the bell q
the bottle.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03

The orator spoke about the things he
had not said. the things be did not be-
heye and the things be would not do.
That fellow" observed the sailor.
is talking at the rate Of about thirty
tots an hour."-Iudge.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03

Something new. Phone 541 and
have your shoes called for, shined
and returned. Dallas Shining Par
lirs, next to Gail.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03

See }. H. Shepherds removal
ad., page 7.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03

Walter L. Tooze, Jr., lawyer, Will
liams bldg.
Polk County observer. (Monmouth, Polk County, Or.) 1888-1927, 1911-11-03

Oscar Hayter. lawyer. Rooms s and
6, Uglow Building.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

nm enal increase of automobiles. It Is
 ,roved by authentic statistics that there Ire more horses in use today than ever before, and the price of horses is higher han ever before. The harness manu fActuring industry, the horsewhip indus try, the wagon and carriage making in dustry, all are more extensive than ever. This i'll spite of the fact that many of the leisurely class have discarded horses in favor of automobiles for pleasure travelling, and that heavy trucking and merchandise delivery in the larger cities, that were formerly done with horses are now done by automobile. ltis a demon strable fact that notwithstanding auto mobiles have to great extent robbed carriage driving of it's pleasure by mak- ing it unsafe, as they have made pedes- trlanism hazardous on the public high ways. the horse is holding it's own, not only in numbers but in popularity. Blu cephalus will stay.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
Letters From the People
Still Up in the Air

Editor News: I was very much in terested Ill your description of the route by which the new trolley railroad will enter our village, but would like to in uuire whether the railroad authorities will be likely to accept the survey which you describe? Canaanite.
 Canaan, Conn. June 12.
 They claim not. On the contrary, they give assurance this very week, in re- sponse to a direct inquiry at the Infor- nation Bureau, that just soon as the final layout is decided upon, The News will be notified, but that up to the pres ent time the question is no nearer set tied than eyer. However, The News's suggestions of last week will undoubt- edly expedite the settlement of it.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
Where the Laugh Comes In
The cake she made looked fine enough

The cake she made looked fine enough
 To justify her pride, But when we came to eat the stuff
 We pretty nearly died She said she could not comprehend
 What trouble there could be, She'd followed closely to the end,
 The cookbook recipe. It certainly seemed strange the cake
 Should turn out such mess, Unless she made some sad mistake
 Despite her carefulness. The book proved such the truth to be
 Beyond the slightest doubt, For from the simple recipe
 Six pages were torn out
 HI. W. Francis in Puck.
 Mrs. Wigwag- your husband takes yoU to the theatre, does he ever go out between the acts?
 Mrs. Guzzler-Well, I wouldn't ex- press it in just that way. He some times comes in between drinks Philadelphia Record.
 Anxious old lady-I say, my good man, is this boat going up or down? Deckhand-Well she's a leaky old tub, mum, so shouldn't wonder if she was going down. But, then. again her b'iler ain't none too good, so she might go up Sydney Bulletin.
 A sailor had just shown a lady over the ship. In thanking him, she said: ''I am sorry to see by the rules that tips are forbidden on youf ship"
 ''Lor' bless you, ma am, ;" replied the sailor, ESQ were apples in the Garden of Eden. "-The Caledonian.
 "What this town needs most" said the eminent publicist, ''is a thorough cleaning up, about a dozen new bridges and first-class subway system"
 You are mistaken," replied the average citizen. What this town needs most is good left handed pitcher. ''- Chicago Record Herald.
 q think it is disgraceful to be enormously rlch."
 "Oh, so do I. was brought up to think that way. But say"
 "Weu,"
 Don't you wish once in a while that you weren't so blamed respectable? ?"- Toledo Blade.
 Johnny Papa, would you be glad if l saved dollar for you?
 Papa-Certainly my son.
 Johnny-Well, I saved it for you. all right You said if brought a first class report from my teacher this week you would give nae dollar, and didn't bring it.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
CANAAN LOCALS

Passengers on the special conc ert train going to Norfolk Thursday evening who chanced to be looking out of the windows On the north side of the train, had an opportunity, near West Norfolk, to see a beautiful fawn standing on the hillside few rods from the track, watching the train. The animal watched until the cars came abreast of it. then dashed up the hill and disappeared in the forest.
 Mir. and Mrs. A. H. Herriman went to Hartford Monday for short stay. MT Herriman's s fast horse, "Friend Direct, '. is being trained on the Charter Oak track by Trainer Harry Brusie.
 Plumber WiggIesworth has completed the work of placing iron pipe along both sides of the bridge near H. k. Lyles' residence on Elm street, and for some distance along the approaches.
 Benjamin expects carload of Few wagons this week. Gall and see them, also his new Harness.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
What the Other Fellows Say

Senator Chandler, of Rocky Hill, said only one woman in his place wanted the ballot. One sensible woman to redeem the reputation of n town is small and Is entitled to the badge of courage. Per haps the other ninety and nine" went astray. No correction on this paraphras- ing of Scripture Is necessary. MT. Chandler's argument against woman suffrage was ''that the good women would be obliged to vote whether they wanted to or not" MT. Chandler should be reminded that all the good women are not antis, the good as well as the thinking women are for equal suffrage. New Haven Union.
 New York is to abolish it's present highway commission but so long as the state isn't going to abolish building good roads the general pubic is satisfed.- Pittsfield Eagle.
 The past is past, the future is as much in the grasp of the suffragists as it ever was. The suffragists of Connecticut have every reason to be proud of their latest campaign and the leadership that carried it on. All that can be said now is. to use an old and homely expression, "More power to them next time" Those WlO Gn10K SuuraR0 mas been Rlll6u WILL find it the liveliest corpse they ever un' dertook to pronounce defunct.-Hartford Post. ,
 To the credit of Fairfield county be it said that every senator hailing from within it's confines staid true for the minority bill. Senators MeNeil, Paddock and Bartlett are each deserving of the plaudits of their constituents for their vote. They will have no cause to regret their action. Bridgeport Farmer. <'
 A lighthouse keeper advertised for a wife and received twenty-five prompt answers, all of the writers perhaps think ing that light housekeeping would make the job Waterbury Republican.
 The rain is interfering with the inter- national polo games seriously, but we all need the rain and some of us can get along without the polo, although having no conscientious scruples against it, Bridgeport Standard.
 Standard Oil stock has been going up ever since the Supreme court decision. After all, John D. Rockefeller may be able to put a little aside for a rainy day. Bridgeport Post.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

to it, but tell tn truth I didn't think much O tn actin. It couldn't hold a candle t East Lynne, or Ten Nights in a Barroom,' But the applause-say if that man Paine eyer runs f'r office after they pass tn woman suffrage bill, they won't be nothin' to it. They had one singer there, Miss Glook, an she sure could sing like martingale-way up in the little thin ones-teedle, deedle, deedle, just like that. Say, she made me feel so much like a fool that 1 almost wanted t' kiss my own wife. Thenthey had tenor singer--so help me, he was tn humliest devil ever sve. Face looked as if it was put on too quick an run before it got sot. But couldn't he sing Seemed just AS if he'd found angel asleep an stole his voice-didn't look bit too good U do it, neither. sez t my wife, sez I, That's tn freakest combination ever see-a million dollar voice, an a twenty-five cent face t' go with it. She sez, Honest, never see such a voice an heard such face at tn same time to once before in all my born days The same night they was young fellow give a slsight.o' hand per- formanoe on tn pianner, an tn way he did claw out tn grace ce-notes-black keys or white keys all tn same t' him he didn't ask no odds. l sez t' my wife, sez I, With them slick fingers O his'n, wouldn't he make great piok-pocket, though, if his talents only run that wayH She didn't make no answer. But he had jest tn same trouble th' fe- male lady violinisty had, tn last night she sure could juggle the fiddle-stick t' beat four of kind an make tn old fid- dle squeal an grunt but that's all they was to it. l marked t' my wife, sez |, That lady would make a corkin' good fiddler if she'd learn a tune or two t' play My wife sez, Shut up, ye fat fool that's Max Brooks celebrated classic "Ooncert-Stuck. sed it seemed jest so t' me, but why tn thunder didn't she give it up an tackle suthin' that wouldn't sticke Then they had another fifty thousand dollar lady singer, an VOW there was ladies right in tn hum chorus-yes sir. even among tn insurgents-that could sing as much as she could I; an I'll bet n heifer my wife could sing jest as loud. I sez C my wife, sez l." sr. s.-.
 "Move we adjourn l" shouted Sam Camp So voted.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
BUcEPHALUS STAYS

The spectacle of horse riding in an automobile through the town on Sun- day, enroute to the Berkshires, would seem to justify the observation of an ob- server, that the autos conquest seemed complete when it comes to the pass that horses ride in automobiles. The circum- stance recalls the remark of the Irish rider, when his saddle horse lifted his hind foot so high to kick bothersome fly away, that it caught in the stirrup
 "Bedad, !" said Pat to the nag, eff ye're goin' t. get on an ride, I'll get off P The horse in the auto last Sunday may we'll have reasoned as nationally as Pat, that if he couldn't travel on foot in front of the vehicle, he might as we'll ride in it! But the conclusion of the observer. as quoted, is defective. The automo- bile is not destined to supplant the horse
 on the road, notwithstanding the phen-
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
States Poor Way

The Connecticut Citizen, temperance periodical gives jail statistics in this state for the past ten years, showing that the total commitments footed up 95,5 ,564, of which 42,324 were for drunkenness and of the total 54,3 1928 had served terms before. This Is a repetition of tae old story, from street to jail and back again. There are many people who spend large portion of their time in jail and they seem to be unable to keep out and when their terms expire they are at liberty only long enough to permit them to get drunk again. The state's failure to treat those cases in such manner as to either benefit the state or the individual, or both for that matter, has resulted in a system that has become drain on the common. wealth. Those men are usually broken down in health, they are unable to work when they reach jail and soon after they recover from their debauch they get out, drop back into their old habits and back they go to a period of confinement and the whole performance is repeated New Britain Herald
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
AMuslc-LovINie COMMUNITY

Now that the Choral Union rehearsals are over, the Norfolk concerts have been given, the musical event of 1911 has be come matter of history, and the gener- osity of "the Stoeckels' has been once more exemplified, it may be pertinent to ask, how many of those who had the privilege of witnessing those classical performances really appreciated the value of the privilege? Here in Canaan, for instance, something over 600 tickets, or invitations, for these concerts were given out. When the character of the productions, the labor contributed by the local choruses, the eminence of the composers and directors participating, the prominence of the professional solo artists, vocal and instrumental. and the magnitude and excellence of the great orchestra, are taken into account and it is borne in mind that such combinations andaggregations of talent are very rarely centers, it is not unreasonable, basing the estimate upon the quantity and quality of the average performance in the Grand Opera Houses of the metro polls, toassume that each ticket or invi- tation was actually worth not far from $10
 Did every Canaanite of the 900 or more who were favored, realize that, and derive enjoyment in proportion? And did those outside the chorus consider that while their chief obligation was to the Stoeckels, their good fortune was directly due to the local chorus, through whom the invitations were issued?
 The chorus had labored and studied and rehearsed faithfully for six months, under the rigid discipline of MT. Paine, in order to make it possible for their fellow townspeople to have, for nothing, what they could not Ihave bought for money. And the eagerness displayed in the scramble for invitations to the musi- cal festival seemed to indicate musical appetite for classical harmony, which was not quite so ravenous few weeks ago when, through the efforts of the same local chorus of the Choral Onion, 8 high-class feast of music was provided, by the Boston Festival Orchestra, at 50 cents a ticket. This venture, which brought here an organization of known and acknowledged excellence that gave splendid concert, attracted mere and meagre handful and resulted in 8 finan- cial loss which the local chorus-to whom bear in mind, our Emusic lovers'' are indebted for the privilege of attend ing the Norfolk concerts for nothing had to make good.
 Nevertheless, we are musical com- munity-un9oubtedly.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

The News commends to it's esteemed fellow citizens these sentiments, from a distinguished source "The citizens of any prosper ous town are always public spirited and united. Stand together. work for the interests of the whole town. Always stand ready to do your part Don't grumble and spend your time in phophesying failures, but help to make every enterprise success, be it great or small. Be energetic and contemplating and your example will be initiated"
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
O. and A.

Editor News: Do you suppose that if the railroad people could be induced to make the first move, in the way of remedying the sidewalk and crossing conditions, their example would have auy effect in bringing about some activ- itv in sidewalk repairing at that wretch ed cofner adjoining? Thanking you in advance, remain yours truly,
 June 13, 1911. R.O.J,
 No telling. It might; Then again it mightn't. You're welcome.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Senator, Dickerman, of New Haven, says the legislature is not likely to ad- journ before the first of October. Sena- tor Shanley, also of New Haven, says the legislature will adjourn by the first of July. Plainly, that's the long and the short of it.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

This is how the St. Louis Globe Democrat accounts for it: "It was the devil who made the fashions. of course he is responsible for the first fig leaf and all it's weird variations unto this day. |" It may be.so. If it is, the devils taste has degenerated since he first began to dress-make and miliiner for the race.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

The governor of Texas has been re- qaested to leave the church because he is against prohibition. And the Bridge port Post ominously observes that Gov ernor Baldwin may find himself in the same boat.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

The ministers of Bridgeport are fight, ing the mayor on the Sunday baseball issue. And while it's leg and leg between them, the Sunday baseball managers are reaping the benefit of the advertising, in overcrowded grounds Moral-Find it for yourself.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
GODS PAY DAY.
BY EMMA RoDEMEYER WATT.

Just labor, dear heart, and be faithful,
 And smile through the tears in your eyes The Master is watching your efforts
 And keeping account in the skies. It's ours just to be willing workers
 Though others may not understand The whole world is Gods mighty vineyard Where each one must till his own land. Be patient, and earnest and loyal,
 And always for betterment try Your efforts will all be rewarded,
 Gods pay day will come by and by.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

An exchange remarks that the man who gets mad at what the newspaper says about him should return thanks three times day for what the newspa- per knew about him and suppressed.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Old Glory didn't wave yesterday as promiscuously as might have been expected on Flag Day. But wait for the Glorious Fourth That'Il be Old Glory $ Day in Canaan.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

"A horse is mans truest friend" said the lover of animals.
 He's more like relation than a friend" replied Farmer Corntossle He makes me think of my boy Josh; allus ready to eat an liable to kick if you put him to work. '-W Washington Star.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
TELEPHONE: CANAAN 12s RING
AS AN ADVERTISING MEDIUM

The News should appeal with special force to the sagacious business man.
 It has an extensive circulation in Western Connecticut, and especially throughout Lttch- field County and Southern Berkshire.
 It has competent staff of wide-awake cor respondents in the various towns to report the local doings each week. and goes into the homes and is perused by the entire families Of the thrifty, Intelligent, reading class of people whom
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Our enterprising merchants have laid in a supply of bunting for the Fourth, that will make the old town look like a circus wagon.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Departing Guest-You've got a pretty place here, Frank, but it looks a bit bare yet.
 Host-Oh, it's because the trees are a bit young. I hope they'll have grown to a good size before you come again. London Opinion
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
THURSDAY, JUNE 15, 1911
DOING GOOD

He that does good to another man, does also good to himself not only in consequence but in every act of do- 5 ing it for the conscience of well doing is ample reward.-Seneca.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

This weeks installment of Comrade Roberts war "reminiscences gets exciting at the finish. Notice it?
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

The suffragists are down again-but not out. Decidedly not.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

According to the papers Carrie Nation left only $2O, 900. It's an untruth. She left all the money in the world
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

The finance committee report contribu- tions to the Fourth of July celebration fund 'coming along fine' That's fine.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Subscribers are requested to notify the pub lisf CT promptly of any failure to receive papers regularly, changes of residence etc
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Listen to the music of the band-the Canaan Cornet Band e
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Get Together. Pull Together. Result are accomplished so.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Gentle reader, what is your oaudid
 opinion about the tariff on free wool?
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
WRITE EALETTER ABOUT

Communications on subjects of general inter- est to The News readers are invited, but no attention will be paid to anonymous letters.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
THE NEWS AGENTS

Extra copies of The News are on sale at the office of publication and at
 Humphreys Drug Store, Canaan, Egglestocts Drug Store, Sharon, Post Office, East Canaan.
 D. IF. Oalxes' Store. Lakeville, Post Office, Falls Village,
 George T. AJohnson's Store Norfolk, F. H. Smith & Co.'S Store Ashley Falls.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
MISCELLANEOUS

R. PATTEN, optlcian of TorrinRton, Conn.,,
 will be at The Garfield" hotel the first Mon-
 day and Tuesday afternoons Of ench month.
 If unable to call send postal. Consultation free. S. R. STARK, Nurse, Canaan. Telephone 15a
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
WANTED

WANTED-Live poultry.
 M. c. Dean Falls Village. WANTED-To hire good-szed cottage at Twin Lakes, for ten days or two weeks commencing Aug. 11th. Address C. II Bocltus. l02 Madison Ave, Hartford, Conn
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

H. VAN DEUsEN wishes Co announce to the public that he ia again doing upholster- ing and furniture repairing. Making new hair mattresses speciality. West Man Street, Canaan, Conn.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

LAWN MOWERS SHARPENED-A W. Mesy senger will make his annual trip sharpening lawn mowers in Norfolk. Canaan TalSeville and surrounding country in July. Wait for him and get your mowers shnrUuued right.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15
Cent-a-Word Advertisements A Minimum Charge 25 Gents D
 FOR SALE ".#

BROILERS FOR SALE-We always have broil- weighing from to lbs. to the pair, ranging in price from S1'25 to S1.75. Order by mall or telephone to !. #h
 Maple Glen Poultry Farm, M1lerton, N. Y.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

me book your orders for Aster plants Eight different colors. Fifteen cents per dozen, Also Celery, Cabbage and Cauli flower plants. Telephone 12S-iI. w. M Beebe FOR SALE-Forty pigs, six weeks to three months old. nice lot and prices right
 Geo. w Hall Falls Village, Conn.
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

FOR SALE -Sixteen-foot Morris canoe, used one season and in excellent condition, complete with 47-foot lateen sail and rigging, Canoe is at present at Twin Lakes and can be see at any time. For full particulars address A. B. Juvenal, 63 .rk Avenue, Worcester, Mass
Connecticut western news., 1911-06-15

Housatonic River. Carries four passengers comfortably. 1 h. q. engine in perfect ccn- dition. Best of reasons for selling Small boat small price. Demonstration cheerfully given. Allyn Fuller, Canaan, Conn,