davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
My Chico For Mayor
is Pete grant
the ladies Pet an pridel

1t certainly was a tart collection OF
enthusiastic pave Founders that
marched through Ruraldene that even
ing and whooped 1t up for the Hon.
Peter Grant
The Candidate, with his wife and
niece and friends, reviewed the parade
from the Peter Grant headquarters"
in town. Then, after marching around
the Hon. William Gray's villa three
times, with the band playing Your
Neck Is Good Place 10 Get 1t, Mr.
Mani" we planted our transparencies
deep in the grassy lawn owned by the
furious Uncle William, and with Gabe
Malone's bull dog to watch them we
left them there for the entertainment
and enlightenment of the Opposition
while we adjourned to the little River.
side Park for the fireworks display.
With the exception of a roman can.
die that sailed into Conrad Puffen.
lotz, and after knocking at his dining.
room door insisted upon doing its
turn inside his Zouave jacket, the fire.
works were shot off successfully, and
the day wound up in a blaze of glory.
1t was a great day for everything in
Ruraldene-except Uncle Peters bank
account
Copyright by G. w. Dillingham; COD
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
DAY DREAMS A HELP

her dreams to comfort ner. II is for
such moments as these that day
dreams are invaluable. They wipe
out by magic the soul-destroying
monotony of the working girls life.
Nor is this all that can be said IN
favor of day dreams. They serve a
more serious purpose They are po-
tent factors in the achievement cf
ones ambition, and the building OF
ones character. The things we Sc
cretly desire and dream about often
strangely enough come true. Just as
the things we fear most often happen
10 us. One has only to desire them
hard enough and dream them strong
enough to have them accomplished
One frequently sees this fact mani
tested. Why then il one possesses a
habit so full OF potency and balm
should one allow ones self to be
ridiculed out OF it by those who know
nothing OF its charms
Yet, day dreaming has It's dangers
Its delights are so insidious that they
often tale possession of one at the
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
NOTES OF INTEREST.

England has twenty-eight railway
tunnels a mile or more long.
Amsterdam has three floating dry
docks for repairing ships and is
building a fourth.
An electrical dredge on the Yukon
river has a capacity of 10000 cubic
yards of earth a day.
1t is estimated that every square
mile of the oceans is inhabited by
120,000,000 living creatures.
The first steel rails ever rolled in
Australia recently were turned out
by New South Wales iron works.
Gray horses are the longest lived;
cream colored ones the most easily
affected by changes in temperature.
Electricity now does practically all
the work in the kitchen of the United
States Military academy at West
Point, N Y
London requires taximeters to 90
connected to the front wheels of taxi
cabs because the rear wheels do the
most slipping
Tests in Dublin have shown that
the wind will carry disease bacteria
200 feet and as high as so feet into
the air, even when there is heavy
rainfall.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
John Henry
MAKES A
HOLIDAY
By GEORGE ". HOBART

| was beginning to hatch. a dark
and devilish plot, and in the morning.
bright and early, had Barney Doolin
at work painting our automobile the
exact colors of the machine owned by
the Hon. William Gray, who had the
temerity to run against Uncle Peter
for mayor
This was Saturday, and since early
morning score of boys roamed all
wherein was printed "Bunch's Advice
TO Society"-a canard of my own de-
vistng to queer Bunch with the So
ciety push.
The cards made an awful hit. Nine
citizens out of every ten didn't know
whether it was straight goods or a
josh, but after reading the card over
for the second time nearly everybody
concluded that the strenuous cam
paign had overcrowded Bunch's men.
tai seating capacity and that he had
gone dippy.
When the afternoon paper, the
Ruraldene Palladium, made its appear
ance, 1T contained a paid get-back
from Bunch on the first page, and 1t
was surely a dizzy dish of words
Ruraldene, as everybody knows, is
an extremely popular suburban town
and is sometimes called The Commu-
ter's Paradise" 1t consists of a hust-
ling business center" and beyond this,
dotting the green In all directions, are
the villas and country homes of the
suburbanites.
Ii was through our army of Commu-
tiers that Bunch tried to reach me.
This is what he had in the after
noon paper:
Voters and citizens of Ruraldene:
There is in our midst an ardent sup
porter and adherent of the Hon. Peter
Grant who spends most of his time
besmirching the fair name of the Com
muteT. This man is the author of a
literary stab in the Suburbanite's
back, a copy of which has recently
come into our possession and which is
published herewith to prove its au-
thor's villainy. and to warn the voters
who may well ask If Peter Grants
henchman belittles the Commuter In
this cruel manner what will Mayor
Grant do to them?' We give space
to this cruel slanderer's effusion that
our citizen Commuters may be on
their guard hereafter:
THE COMMUTER"
(By John Henry.l
"Mirabel!"
Eyes, dear" answered the Commu-
ters wife.
THE Suburbanite pins his faith to
a railroad schedule only to find that
somebody plnches the pin!"
Yes, Claudius," the wife answered.
''Mirabel! the Commuters life is a
moving one and full of cinders!"
Yes, Claudius!"
"Mirabeli"
Commuter Goosedipper paused and
shook the family growler slowly from
side to side.
Eyes, Claudius," the faithful wife re-
sponded.
1T is now little less than daylight
on Monday morning." he said: land
must leave Insomniahurst and go
forth to the great city where get my
wages"
Goosedipper signed and squeezed
the pitcher.
"And TO-DAY the Chokeup and Crawl
along r. R. takes off fourteen more
trains!" he gasped.
"Claudiusi" the wife exclaimed, pale
from one end of her face to the other
To-day I must go forth on train
which will look no more upon In
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
CRIMINAL NEGLECT
OF SKIN AND HAIR

Cuticura Soap and Ointment do so
much for poor compilations, red,
rough hands, and dry, thin and fall
ing hair, and cost so little that it is
almost criminal not to use them.
Think OF the suffering entailed by
neglected skin troubles-mental be-
cause of isfiguration-physica be-
cause of pain. Think of the pleasure
OF clear skin, soft white hands and
good hair. These blessings are often
only a matter OF a little thoughtful,
timely care, viz:-warm baths with
Cuticura Soap, assisted when neces-
sary by gentle anointings with Cuti.
cura Ointment. The latest Cuticura
book, an invaluable guide to skin and
hair health, will be mailed free, on
application to the Potter Drug &
Chem. Corp. Boston. Mass.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Street Sayings Are Short Lived.


If soms London slang has a short
life, the street sayings current for a
time pass away even more quickly
Most of these, such as HAS your
mother sold her mangle?" who shot
the dog?" and How are you of for
soap? survive only in the pages OF
contemporary novelists.
Some. however, have a long life
Does your mother know you're out p
has been traced back to 1870 and may
possibly have been current before
then. Others are revived, with slight
alterations. Ten years ago rude little
boys would shout, Where did you
get that hat?" when their grand
fathers would exclaim, What! the
same old hail" And the expression
CT dissent emphasized nowadays by
S'Not in these trousers!" used to be
conveyed thirty years ago by the tag,
Not in these s!"-London Chron
icle.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
WELCOMED BY MEN WHO
SMOKE

Particular men who smoke realize
how offensive to people of refinement
is strong tobacco breath, and how
Objectionable to themselves is that
dark brown taste" in the mouth
afte. smoking
Paxtine Toilet Antiseptic is worth
its weight in gold for this purpose
alone. Just little in glass of water
rinse the mouth and brush tae teeth
The rlouth is thoroughly deodorized,
the breath becomes pure and sweet
AID delightful sense of mouth clean
illness replaces that dark brown to-
bacco taste.
Paxtine is far superior to lisuid an
tiseptics and Peroxide for all toilet
and hygienic uses and may be obtain
ed at any drug store 25 and SOC box
or sent postpaid upon receipt of price
by The Paxton Toilet Co, Boston.
Mass. Send for free sample.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

somniahurst until many bitter years
have faded into the elsewhere" he
muttered all foam-bedecked into the
pitcher.
And must lose you so soon?" said
the good wife, bursting INTO tears.
1T is the will ct Fate" he said.
THE years viii be long between US, "
she said, sobbing with her voice.
Yves, but | viii telegraph you
money once in WHILE" he whispered,
restraining the impulse to cross his
fingers.
"Oh, the awful suburban railroad
system" she shuddered, separating
the wife from the husband and the
father from the children he can never
know in their infancy!"
Teach the children not TO forget
me while l am away at the office, "
said Goosedipper. eagerly.
Il will. Claudius, If 1 have TO do it
with shawl strap" said the loving
wife.
Then GooSedipper arose.
Let me lcok around the old home
once again before 7 so away TO duty
on the 1909 accommodation. which
runs eagerly like a rabbit. hither and
thither, and no where in particular!
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Together with his wife, hand in
hand. followed by the cat and the lit
tie Goosedippers, the brave Commuter
took parting walk among his house
hold
And when his emotion overcame
him and he stepped not unkindly but
heavily withal upon the cat the scene
was too pitiful for words
1t was a touching sight to see them.
Then with sob Goosedipper grab
bed his lunchbox and was gone.
Il caught a train many years ago
but we had to change cars at Salt
Lake City, so | came home by the
way of Bangor, Maine" was the only
explanation the Commuter made.
Don't apologize, Claudius." said
the loving wife. Il knew you would
be home some day if you had to wait
for the Panama Canal 10 get finished
Such is the simple faith of the Com
muters.
Where is Spartacus?" said Goose
dipper. when l left you he was our
Oldest son. l hope no change has
happened to him, Mirabel? The day
before l went on the 1903 train little
Spartacus put on his first knickerbock-
er pants. Where is he?
THAT was many years ago." sighed
the wife. when Spartacus grew old
enough to learn the schedule of the
trains he sWOre never TO leave home
until the railroads made some ar
rangement to get him back again, and
SO he is now hermit"
"a hermit" inquired Goosedipper;
what is a lermit?"
"a hermit" answered the wife; "a
hermit is Commuter who loves his
home too well to commute"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

lSore Guards" $50 strong. marching
with cape-mackjatoShes plug hats and
canes. We were immense, with the
exception of three or four dubs who
had borrowed top-pieces too small
for their braineries, and who had to
break ranks every five minutes to
coax their lids away from the street
car tracks.
We carried transparencies reading
as follows:
PETER GRANT WILL MAKE
GOOD! BOOST HIM IN.
WHO is PETER GRANTS
OPPONENT?
A PIECE OF CHEESEl
VOTE FOR THE REAL RINA-
kA6Oo!
PROGRESSIVE PETERl
WILL WE PASS BILL GRAY
TIE lcE-PITcHER?
o, MAYBE!
GEORGE WASHINGTON ANo
PETER GRANT
NEVER TOLD A LEI
DID OLD BILL GRAYf
ASK ME!
REMEMBER THE MONROE
DOCTRINE AND VOTE
FOR PETER GRANT,
Next came the peter Grant Zou
aves." consisting of Conrad Puffen.
LOTT, four assistant hop-beaters from
the brewery, and thirty-six school
boys, not one of whom would have a
vote coming to him for at least twelve
years.
But the Zouave makeup was hot
favorite with Uncle Peter. He was
out to have a splotch of color in that
parade no matter what the cost, and
he got his wish.
Following the Zouaves came the
Martha Grant League of Helping
Hands" consisting of Conrad's wife,
the lady friends of the four hopbeat.
erS, Hank, the gardeners vile, and
enough of Hanks children to make
that portion of the parade look like
the recess hour IN public school
Lizzie Joyce, our cook. ad oeen led
to believe by some unsf up lous per,
son that the Hon. William Gray, II
elected, would introduce the Irish
eviction gag into Ruraldene. So the
parade for Lizzie, and she marched
among the Helping Hands with the
freckled parasol in one fist and in
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Petroleum In Cakes.

Tank steamers taking oil the world
around may in time be a thing of the
past. Now they have got up solid oil,
and they declare it is almost pure
petroleum. Slight pressure, such as
squeezing a cake of it in the hand,
causes the oil to ooze out. The cake
of petroleum, perhaps packed into a
wooden case lined with tinfoil, thus
preventing waste or evaporation, may
be shipped around the world,
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
TAKE AWAY TIE MoNoTONY or
THE DAILY GRIND.
How One Girl EnIiVens Her Somewhat
Monotonous Life-Really Serve
a Serious Purpose.

She walks 20 and from her work
and never has a dull moment, be-
cause sonas one OF her dream men
escort her. She holds loag and clever
conversations with them, and enters
the gloomy walls where her Gays
work is to be accomplished glowing
from the effect of their admira ton
and comprehension
She puts herself to sleep at night
with dreams. and admits that she
would not have the courage 10 rise
day after day at the depressing hour
az {. when other girls are snugly
sleeping, 10 face the daily grind ot
Ter life if shs mad not the glow OF
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
New FISHING Industry,

Albiccre fishing in Nova Scotian wa
ters has become interesting. but for
financial reasons. These fish frequent-
ly weigh over 500 pounds and are
known as horse mackerel. A number
were shipped to Boston last season
The average price there is three and
one-half cents per pound. Formerly
these fish were considered a nuisance
to the fishermen.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Ike the Other Chicks.

Charles t. Rose, equally we'll known
In Masonic work and banking circles
of Cleveland. is a great chicken fan
cier, Rhode Island Reds being his
favorite breed. Walking through his
incubator house he discovered that
Helen, the three-year-old daughter.
had followed him.
Come here, little chickabiddy." he
called to her. And when she ran
up to him to be tossed up and down,
she asked: Papa, which was my In
cubator?"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
"The John Henry Homo Guards"

And little Augustus Appius, where
is he?" inquired the husband after a
while
Little Augustus Appius has grown
up and developed the brain of deep
thinker" said the wife. with ten
years more study he will be able to
think deep enough to invent a subur-
ban train that will have the sense and
the courage to keep on going till
it reaches the place 1t started for"
Eyes, Claudius," continued the wife,
"cur little Appius is a scientist. Every
time he reads about new idea he sits
down and invents it! He is now
working on a useless pole for the
wireless telegraph"
The husband went out on thunder
strike.
my, my, my!" said Goosedipper.
81 go away on the Chokeup &. Crawl
along R. R., and before l get back
my children grow up and get famous.
Such is the suburban railroad system!
Where is little Gladiolus? When l
left she was the youngest. l hope she
did not change her mind during my
absence?"
NO." said the wife, "but she has
grown up to be car-shy girl.
"Car-shy?" echoed her husband.
"Yes," responded the wife; ''once
when she was just a little child
thought l heard the shrek of loco
motive, and / tainted with surprise.
1t was false alarm because the
shrek was made by the yeast brewery
over behind the hill. but the scene
made a deep impression on Gladiolus-
Ever since that moment she throws a
fit when anybody mentions railroad
train because she doesn't believe
there is such a thing in the world"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Preferred Carpenters.

Piumber-Why do you go on using
this old well with an old-fashioned
hoisttng apparatus, when for few
dollars you could get city water put
in your house?
observation-disclosures when this ap-
paratus gets out of order / can get II
fixed by a carpenter.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
child,s Pathetic Suicide.

A pathetic tragedy took place the
other day at Nuneaton (Warwick).
the victim being Sarah Ann Farmer.
a child of thirteen. who committed
suicide by drowning herself in
canal. The child lived with her moth
er's brother and his wife. She start
ed work at q Nunestoa factory some
months ago. but was discharged after
a few days. Since then she had tried
again and again to obtain work else
where. but always unsuccessfully. Re
csntly, the aunt's son asked the Eirl
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Unsafe.

Warden-So you moved No. 1913.
What's the natter He seemed to be
very quiet and docile.
Assistant was afraid he'c tear
the Jail down You see. 1 learned
that he was graduated in the same
college class as No. 129 and that
they we're planning reunion for TO
night-Puck
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

which are declared 10 render examina-
tons futile Recently he forecasted
accurately all the questions set In sew
eral examinations. with the rescl,
that his classmates all scored fun
marks by learning the answers to,
these questions by heart and neglect
ing any other preparation.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

most inopportune moment. A victim
of this enchanting habit whose days
are spent in stenographic thrall, con-
fesses that she often spells a whole
page of plain copy by jumping two
lines after having accomplished a
brilliant bit Of imaginary repartee to
an imaginary dream man.
This is the st%ge when day dream
ing should be strangled Allowed to
riot in this manner, it will curtail.
for all time, ones efficiency. But kept
in check and INDUCED only when one
is walking or dressing or resting, IT
will prove a marvellous panacea to the
girl whose nature Graves beauty and
romance, yet the environment Of
whose life banIshes such delights
from her.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Looklno Out for Number One.

Sydney lad been given some dis
carded millinery with which to amuse
herself. She trimmed o marvellous
looking hat, and so arranged it that a
long red ostrich plume hung straight
down from the front OF the brlm. over
her baby face.
Come here, Sydney" said her
mother Let me tack that feather
back. out of your eyes"
ooh. no, mother! 1 want 1t that
way, so | can see it myself. Most
always only other people can see the
feathers on my hats" Judge.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

to clean his boots, and when she re-
fused he struck her and told the girl
to go out and get work When she
returned home in tbs evening there
was further unpleasantness and even
tually the child made her way to the
cana. and in the darkness. drowned
herself.-London Mail
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Little Stories for Business Women
PoIly's Pies.

sale at No go John street, at noon
every day. Whole Pies 25 cents. Big
slice cents"
Polly hired a small boy to hand
these cards to the workmen as they
passed by the house the next morning.
thinking that after the first day her
pies would need no advertising.
Not daring to venture much, she
baked four custard pies and four made
Of canned peaches, and arranged them
neatly on a white covered table on the
side porch with a pile Of wooden
plates and wrapping paper, and was
ready dressed in neat calico dress
and white apron when the noon whis-
tie blew. In a few minutes a boy
came somewhat bashfully up the walk
and pointing to the custard pies, said:
Gimme one of them" and laid down
his quarter. Polly Immediately put
aside the bit of silver for lucky
piece.
Moments passed and she grew anx'
ious till finally the same boy came
running back and asked for three more
pies, taking one of peach and two OF
custard. The noon hour was now
over and Polly was little disappoint-
ed, although she had not counted on
selling many the first week.
Then she thought of selling the left
over pies to her neighbors, and pack
ing them in a basket, she started
down street and sold them all to busy
housekeepers The next day She sold
a dozen pies with calls for more, and
made arrangements with two bogs to
carry pies to the factory, for which
service each was to receive slice OF
pie as payment
Polly has learned how to buy mate
rails in large quantities, has wom-
an come to help her every morning,
and with some assistance from her
grandparents is earning a comfortable
income with her pies.
Copyright. 1910. by Joseph B. Bowles.)
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Marked hu New Method

A wave power motor that a Cali
fornian recently patented utilities the
horizontal motion of the water in
stead of the vertical as usually is the
case in such machines.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Bricks That VIII Float.

The inventor of new form OF lin
ing bricks claims they are impervious
to moisture and so tight they will float
in water.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Rank, power, wealth. influence, con-
stitute no exemption from activity or
attention to duty but lay weight OF
real accumulated responsibility on
the possessor.-Sir Thomas Bernard.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Wool fabrics only are employed
In the making of SINCERITY
CLOTHES" produced by Kuh. Nathan
& Fischer Company, Chicago. Write
for Style Book No. z.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

1t som etimes happens that woman
marries a man because she is sorry
for kim. But is not that poor way
to show her sympathy?
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

ppoiS dno ACIIdlC
troubles by your
m edi cine. ! had
been troubled with
both for fourteen
years and consulted
different doctors,
but failed to get any
relief. After using
Lydia E. Pinkham's
We ge table Com
pound and Blood
Purifier l can say l
m, a xzal1 u-onaoY,
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Comfort for Motorists.

A pneumatic couch has been invent
ed for the comfort and convenience
of motorists who must lie on their
backs beneath cars to make repairs.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

DR.. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets fret put up
40 years ago They regulate and insigor-
ate, stomach, liver and bowels. Sugar.
coated tiny granules
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
BUILDING Blocks o. Cork.

Floors and furniture are not
scratched by children playing with
new building blocks made of cork III
Germany.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Poten. Wine.

At Rigi hotel the following notice
is posted up-"In this hotel the wine
leaves the traveller nothing 20 hops
TOR
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Mrs. Benham-They can't say that
all your money goes on my back.
Benham-Not If they look at your
face.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Some men are anxious to get money
because they think 1t will enable them
TO get more.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Something New In cialrvoyance.
A new problem for schoolmasters is
reported from okayama, japan. where
a boy named Kawasaki. aged sixteen.
has developed gifts Of clairvoyance
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06
Took professors Word for II.

Didn't you hear all of the profes-
sor's lecturer
why no. He began by saying
that sleep is the secret of right liv-
ing-and then 1 came home and went
to bed"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1911-06-06

Garfield Tea will regulate the liver, Civ
ing freedom from sick-headache and bilious
attacks. 1t overcomes constipation.