davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
JAYH.AWKER JOTS

Verd Napier has observed that
some of those who claim to have
come from a noble family seem to
| have come long, long way.
Related by the Syracuse Journal:
The day before she was to be mar
ried an old negro servant came to her
mistress and intrusted her savings to
her keeping. why should l keep
your money for you? l thought you
were going to be married ?" said the
mistress. so L is, Missus, but do you
spose I'd keep all dis yer money in
de house wild dat strange Niger"
Many Kansas editor prefaces en-
gagement and wedding notices with
will ring" or, the wedding bells
rang" etc. And will the Kansas edi-
tors please stand up and be counted
who have heard bells ringing as in
cidents to a. wedding, either before,
at. or after the event. Betting is ten
to one that there are not many of
them.
One day last week was talking to
one of the young men who was here
with the flying machine, and he ex-
cused himself to go write a letter to
his mother, writes Tom Thompson in
his Howard Courant. He said he had
been away from home most of the
time for twelve years, but he had
made it a practice to write to his
mother twice a week, and that he US
ually sent her a postcard every day
How many young men away from
home write a letter to mother as Of
ten as once a week? Once when l
was postmaster a few years ago,
man whose motherless young daugh-
ter was away on a visit. walked three
miles into town every night for
week-once through the rain-in his
anxiety to hear from his girl, who had
promised ito write as soon as she got
there The expected did not come
and the poor disappointed daddy act
uaIly broke down and cried I would
have given dollar for letter or even
a postal card from that thoughtless
girl to hand out to him, and after he
was gone I wrote and told her all
about it, and wound up with as sharp
a lecture as could hurriedly COM
pose BY return mail the daddy got a
good fat letter which I am sure warm
ed his heart. and I got note of
thanks, for she was a good girl but
was having "such good time she
plum forgot her promise to write.
Years after that when she came back
to visit friends here and was wheeling
a roly-poly baby in front of her. she
stopped me on the street to tell me
how she never forgot the incident. And
there were tears in her voice, for the
loving old daddy was then gone on his
long tourney.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

ers' certificates so that a teacher may
go from one state to another with a
certificate which will show just what
grade of a teacher she may be- It is
good idea. too, in more ways than
one. For one thing, free inter
change of the teachers between sew
eral states could but have a broaden
ing influence on the schools.
The plans of p P. Claxton, United
States commissioner of education, who
veloping much closer relations between
the schools of all the states. are also
of an excellent variety. He would APP
point expert educators who would
gather all the information about the
workings of the different branches of
the school systems in the states. This
information would be compiled and
then distributed among the educators
of each of the states. In this way it
would be possible for the educators of
one state to pick out easily the most
successful educational methods in any
of the states and they could rearrange
their systems and curriculuns accord
ingly. The only thing that stands in
the way of Commissioner C1axton put
ting this plan in operation is lack
of funds to pay salaries to these in
vestigators, as we'll as their expenses.
He is going to ask congress for suf-
ficient appropriation for this purpose.
The Kansas delegation in congress will
be aiding in a great cause if they give
this proposition their earnest support.
Not more than six such investigators
will be needed Possibly four will be
enough. The elimination of a single
torpedo boat from the yearly naval es-
Inmates would provide all the money
needed and considerably more.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
QUAKER NIEDITATIoNs.
lFrom the Philadelphia Record

IFrom the Philadelphia Record.I
A checkered career can't always be
checked.
A board meeting-a lumbermen's conven-
ton.
Tho heiress isn't the only girl who puts
on airs.
Heaven won't be nearly exclusive enough
to suit some people.
It's a good plan 10 look before you leap.
especially in leap year.
Cupid sometimes sends divorced couplss'
back to be repaired
There is plenty of room at the top, but
most of us prefer TO follow the crowd.
Most of US are willing 10 lend helping
had to the people who don't need II.
There seems 20 be a bond OF sympathy
between the black sheep and the fatted
calf.
I'd is much easier for woman to change
her mind than for a man to change his
luck.
The old man who proposes to a young
girl might ask her how she would like
to be his widow.
Blobbs-''Scribbler says he can't COM
pose a poem unless he Is smoking" Sl0bbs
Isn't there some scheme we can get up
to make him stop smoking?"
First Typewriter Girl-"She's a pretty
quick operator, isn't she2" Second Type
writer Cirl-"Quick? I should say she
was. She hadn't been IN her job two weeks
before she was engaged to the boss"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

apartments, prepared to receive almost
any sort of condemnation from his
friends lips.
Mr.. Weldon was seated before a
swapping fire, for it was Novemb Der
and the air was crisp The lamplight
shining through his straw-colored hair
made him look like a halo-encircled
cherub. H. arose from his chair and
held out a cordial hand.
I've been expecting you, Hilary" he
said, smiling.
You have?'' muttered Hilary guilt
lily. How long?"
From the beginning returned
Cupid, setting a chair for him and
pushing the hox of cigars across the
table.
cupid, old boy" rnurmured Hilary.
you don't know what a cur 1 fell 1
didn't know that day when predicted
that when you-er-that 1 would-er
you miscaiculated my ability as a
mixer of love philters if you thought
I'd let you escape my matrimonial net
Hilary" laughed Cupid Weldon. 1T
was a put-up job on my part. and 1
must say that 1 never saw two people
walk into a trap as did you and Lucy
After Hilary had pounded his friend
Justify that plump young man conde-
scended to listen to Hilary's rhapsod-
les. AS Hilary paused for breath before
beginning again, he noticed that Cupid
Weedon's eyes had lost their careless
light and were sadly fixed on the dart
ing flames.
Cupid" said Hilary doubtfully,
you are sure-aren't you ever going
to find the girl of your heart and fol-
low the example of the rest of us?
For answer Cupid detached a locket
from his watch fob and opening it,
gave it to Hilary. Within was a pic
ture of Hilary's younger sister, who
had died a dozen years before. He
was startled, for he had never sus-
pected a romance between them.
ct found the girl of my heart and
lost her again. said Cupid Weldon
gravely, as he replaced the locket
But I want all my friends to be as
happy as I once hoped to be''-(Copy-
right, 1911, by Associated Literary
Press).
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
GLOBE SIGHTS.
rFrom the Atchison Globe.l


Some of your enemies are assets
No use trying to please a crouch; he
doesn't want to be pleased.
Some men would need raincoats On the
Sahara if they were going to chew to-
5accO there.
About the only man who isn't a little
bit afraid to die is the one WHO is afraid
to live.
Tt may also be said for the men that
very few of them want curly hair bad
enough to ,nrl it.
With the exception of bank robbers, few
men find it harder to spend money than
to acquire It
another shoe string in the house when
they break one.
An Eskimo woman has this advantage:
she has ample opportunity to use her ex-
pensive furs.
Probably an old dog gets more satisfac-
ton out of it's profession than any of the
other loaferS.
nestle economy until she can shut door
in an agents face
Speaking of forethought, not much pre-
paration for winter is made in advance
of the first blizzard
Our artistic sense isn't sufficiently de-
veloped to enable US TO admire hand
some coffin a great deal
Another little problem for today: Does
the average man have any use for half
the keys he carries?
Neither is a man henpecked enough to
hurt if his wife takes pains to cook the
things she knows he likes
There are actresses in this world who
are happily married, ana many other IN
teresting and unusual people
You may have observed that the profess
siona1 1oafer usually knows where he can
get a lot of good jobs
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
KANSAS COMAENT
THE ENDLESS CHAN.

The Abilene business men have Just
right to feel sore. After contributing
freely to the fair, the president pur-
chased some of their decorating ma
teriaI from mail order house and
paid iderably more for it than the
same article could have been pur-
chased from a home merchant. As
a result the merchants left their dis
play booths in the agricultural hall
to be used by the catalogue houses,
the fair exhibit was a complete fall
ure. 1t will more than likely injure
the fair permanently, as no fair can
be success without the support or
the business nen.-McPherson Free
man. And SO it goes-the endless
chain of trouble When a man be-
gins buying things out of his home
town he is poisoning the wells of bust
ness in the towr Here is this Abilene
case. 1t wasn't what the man saved
or lost on the bunting-that was few
dollars But his pie encouraged
town suffered, the fair suffered, the
county suffered. Trading away from
home is a form of malicious greed
that brings nothing but trouble to men
who indulge in it. Merchants are the
least sufferers. The poison in the
business well strikes down innocent
people-clerks who suffer from lost
trade, property owners who lose rent,
1aborers who lose work. The storm of
greed makes waves all over the pond.
1t never stops. Aside from the sensible
commercial reasons why people should
buy at home, are the moral reasons.
For the man who buys out of town is
merely shipping in trouble to his
neighbors. When a man sees his
friends and business associates buying
his own line of goods from out of
town-it doesn't make him a good
citizen And in a town a good citizen
is rather to be chosen than great
Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
FOR OBLIGATIONS PROGRESS

Nothing but benefit to the public
school systems of the various states
can come from such conferences as
the one that was held in this city
by the state superintendent of public
instruction. In education as in all
other things, the interests of most of
the states of the union are in direct
accord. Cooperation in all things is
the watchword of the day with the
American commemorative They are
striving for a uniformity of laws con-
corning many and various matters.
They have discovered that such laws
are needed if vexed questions that are
common to all the states are handled
in about the same fashion, and given
the same sort of treatment. And there
is no good reason why there should
not be something of cooperation be-
tween the states in the development
of their educational systems.
An important matter that the super
intendents have under consideration is
the Standardization Of teachers certifi-
Gates. There is a great variance now
in the standards demanded by these
certificates in the several states. A
teacher holding a certificate in one
state is like a stranger in a strange
land as far as her documentary quail
fications to teach are concerned if she
steps across the line into another state
for the purpose of looking for a school.
The idea is to standardize the teach
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
WHAT A SHAME.

He had a prophylactic bent,
And led a sterile life.
Had hygienic children and
A sanitary wife
Lived in fuInigated house
And wore aseptic suits,
Ate germicidal food and smoked
Denieotined cheroots.
His milk was always pasteurized,
He drank denatured water;
He neer forgot to swat the flies,
Mosquitoes he would slaughter.
He screened his doors and windows and
His office disinfected;
Against microbes of every kind,
He felt himself protected.
He exercised; he slept by rule
And timed his every breath;
His health was excellent and he
Defied disease and DEATH
His plan was admirable, no doubt,
But darn the measly luck.
He went and got run over by
A ten-ton power truck.
Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
IFrom the chicago News1

IFrom the Chicago News.I
A mans natural bent seems to be
crooked.
An elastic conscience is apt to fly back
and sting you.
Now look out for slump in the ice
cream soda market.
Some men would rather go to Jail than
to church social
a bartender says strong breath usual
" indicates a weak character.
No. Alonzo, the proprietor of swim
ming school isn't exactly divekeeper
Nearly every man has fool theory that
he believes the world will finally adopt
It sometimes happens that only his wife
knows whether a man is a good thing
or an easy mark
Some men are born great and some 9TH
ers roll up their trousers and wade right
into the midst of greatness
As a general rule married men do not
lie from choice But their wives persist
in asking such foolish questions
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
HUAOR or THE DAY

''At what age" she asked. do you con-
slider a woman to be most beautiful"
AT your age" he replied.
But anyone might have said Il. Her
father had million--Chicago Record
Herald.
The Bull Pup-How did you lose your
tail, old man?
The Yellow Cur-In trolley accident.
The Bull Pup-Do you miss Il much2
The Yellow Cur-Not as much as the
boys do who used TO tie tin cans to it,
Chicago News.
How far is Il between these two
towns?" asked the lawyer.
About four miles as the flow cries,
replied the witness
you mean as the crow flows"
NO put in the judge, he means as
the fly crows"
And they all looked at each other. feel
ing that something was wrong.-Every-
body > Magazine.
The modern mother 90 her daughter).
Look here, my dear, 1 going TO give
a bridge party this afternoon, and 1 want
you to stay and fill in.
Daughter (wearily): Oh. mother, -
That's IT. You are all alike, Never
ready to help me in my household duties"
Life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Men with aliases generally have use
for alibs.
X
Too many people want to try out
their remedies first on others.
X
Some folk are so credulous they ac-
cept as realities the tricks of magi-
clans.
X
If a man believes he has a strong
constitution he's apt to abuse it all
the more.
Nothing savors of being a joke that
will do the slightest harm to others.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
IdR
E2SQS28 HE6x

An old batch who eventually
changes his condition, is generally
considered a fair target for almost
anything. That's why we venture TO
suggest that Mrs. Dodd Castor begin
Keeping House at once, instead OF
waiting until after the honeymoon.
Whenever We see the printed ex-
preston, died like rats" we can not
help wondering whether rats can die
any deader than other animals.
Hon. w. r. Hearst has returned to
the Democratic party. but this seems
TO be Democratic period in history,
and all handicaps may fail.
BY a tiresome process OF arithmetic.
we find that, by shaving himself a
man may in time. save the price OF
some new safety razor blades.
Another advantage Adam had over
his successors: when he told what he
considered a fresh one. there was no
dub present to observe: THAT has
been my favorite joke ever since
heard it at school. Aw-haw. aw-haw.'
The A J. Drexel. jr's.. have a new
baby-the logical heir to two enormouA
fortunes but the bets are even that
baby who isn't heir to anything but
the proverbial 'sins of the father"
Our ultimate conclusion is that you
can't tell blamed thing about IL. Even
a messenger boy is liable TO develop
into a fast young man.
The High School World has % edi-
tors, which insures a wide circulation
providing each has the usual editorial
privilege of deadheading a few copies
to friends.
HOP
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

I
thine own mouth; a stranger. and not
thine own lips. Proverbs XVII 2.
Unfortunately for themselves. there
are countless people on earth today
who might profit exceedingly by giving
attention and consideration to the
precept of Solomon which is quoted
above. They are in every one of lifes
stations from the highest to the low
est. They are in every trade and call
ing. Not only are they obsessed with
the usually wrong idea that there ac-
complishments are of a superior order,
but they also never hesitate to make
that fact known to their friends and
acquaintance, and even to the stran-
gers with whom they come in contact.
But the impression they convey is gen
orally the reverse. if they only knew it,
of what they desire it should be.
No human frailty is quite so repug-
nant as self praise. Nor is any so I'M
necessary. The man who does any
thing worth while something large
and consequential. does not need to
climb on a housetop and proclaim his
achievements to the passing multitudes
below. If he thinks they will stop,
listen and applaud, he has misjudged
human nature. The best he will get
from strangers is a quiet laugh. From
his friends will come only pity. Yet
men, and men who would otherwise
loom up larger than they do, are doing
this very thing every day The world
is not slow to recognize the merit of
any worthy endeavor, nor is it stingy
with its appreciation It is unusual for
a man not to get the rewards that are
actually due him. And he is surer to
get them if he does not go after them.
An occasional page of history shows,
it is true. that a genius here and there
has not been treated with justice, or
his labors properly appreciated, until
long after he is dead and buried. But
these instances are rare.
It is equally true that the deserved
recognition is always given where the
words said or the deeds done are not
of sufficient Importance to attract pub
lie notice. In the everyday affairs of
the less gifted the ordinary humans,
their sayings and their accomplish
ments are ever measured up according
to their worth, and credit given Just
because a man is not being patted on
the back necessarily by his employer,
or his friends, and being told how
smart he is, or what good work he is
doing, is no evidence that his efforts
are not being estimated at their true
value and appreciated. Perhaps, in
the usual affairs Of life. not enough
deserved praise is given as freely as it
should be. Maybe this is all for the
best. For even a little we'll directed
and well meant praise has been known
to spoil the individual to whom it was
given. The exceptions are rare. how
ever, where the endeavors and the re-
suits achieved by all men are not given
their due. even if there is no shouting
about it The occasions are rare,
though, where the man who is given
to self praise even gets as much credit
as he may really be entitled to.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
IFrom the New York Press.I

TFrom the New York Press.I
Success is always open 20 conviction on
any subject; failure never.
a girl just seems 20 go into a trance
over a plano player II he wears his hair
long enough
The more you have to pay for a thlnI
to buy II the less you could get for Il II
you were selling II.
1t would take more money than there
is in the world for a man 10 have any he
could spare to his poor relations.
It's better to be able to do a thing
somebody else's way that you don't un-
derstand than not to be able 10 do Il
your own way that you do understand
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

Not any very loud protesting has
been done by the magazines because
of the recent ruling of the postoffice
department by which the bulk of their
output is distributed throughout the
country by fast freight. They'll have
right to kick. though, if a subse-
quent order provides for the trans
portation of the magazines by aero
planes, the latest thing in the way of
mail carriers. These carriers so SO
miles and more an hour to be sure
when they 60 But they seldom go
long or go far without having to take
a rest for three or four days. Fast
freight is far more preferab BILE.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

One word for the dear people and two
for themselves. Fruit growers say that
if each person in the United States
would eat five apples a day there would
be no need for a national board of
health. or any other kind of a health
board. And this prescription would ap-
peal more strongly to the proletari 1t
were it not for the fact that real choiIe
eating apples sell, even now, at the
rate of two for a nickel
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

Carnegie's hero fund commission does
a great work each year in passing GU;
substantial rewards to many who have
performed acts Of heroism and extend
ing benefits to relatives of those who
lost their lives in efforts to succor 9th
ers. But there are any number Of he
roes who do not come within the ken
of the commission. They're just ordi-
nary plug citizens fighting the ordinary
battles Of life against tremendous odds
and with monumental handicaps. OF
course, they're not entitled to help
from the Carnegie fund under the deed
of its gift, but many of them are far
bigger heroes than some who get the
Carnegie medals.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

An elaborate investigation of the ex-
press companies methods of doing bust
ness has been undertakes by the in
terstate commerce commission. Regu-
lating express rates to more reason
able figures is the objective point. This
would be brought about in a jiffy -
real parcels post law was put in op-
aratinra
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

Judge Stuart is pleased with the pros
poets of his candidacy for the Repub-
lican nomination for congress IN First
Kansas district Was there ever a can
didate for any nomination or electio
who wasn't pleased with his prospects
until the votes We're counted?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

That frost which has been threaten
ing this locality for many days now is
having hard work to materialize. And
if the local weather bureau keeps on
predicting its arrival daily it is al
most sure to call the turn before long.
A fall without frost would be tribe
out of the ordinary
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

United States Senator Cullom says
he will not be candidate for re-elec-
ton unless the people of Illinois make
a mighty noise that they want him 70
be. Uncle Shelby will probably be able
to hear a pin drop at any time dur
ing the next few months.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21
That the Missouri Pacific is gettin

That the Missouri Pacific is getting
right in more ways than one these
days is evidenced by the fact that it
will not dispute its liability for a re-
cent disastrous wreck. Not so many
years ago and it would have been an
unheard of thing for a railroad to ad-
NIT that it was to blame for a wreck
until forced to do so in court.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-10-21

Robert J. Collier is not achieving
much success in operating his new
aeroplane. He ought to take his chief
editorial writer, Norm Hapgood. with
him as a pilot or for ballast. Norm is
light and flighty enough to sustain
more than himself in the air for a
continued DeriOd