The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1911-12-30
CHAPTER XIII
(Consinuedy

II
My friends" said Major Piper. I'm
not saying anything against Colonel
| Todhunter personally, but | want 10
warn you that he's playing mighty
undetermined game. He's telling too
many good stories, my hearers, and
it's when he sets you to laughing over
them stories that he's playin' tricks
with you. It's a peculiar fact, but |
notice that. while Colonel Todhunter
stories seem mighty harmless on the
surface, every one OF 'em makes some
kind OF a point for William j. Strick-
land In an innocent sort OF way. Now,
my fellow Democrats, | like a good
story as well as any man In the world,
but | put IL to you that good stories
amt arguments, aud don't intend
TO see you made unsettled in your
minds without clear logical reasons
being advanced. You just keep a grip
on yourselves. my friends-we've
promised the Honorable Stephen X.
Yancey that he'll get the banner vote
In Vernon county's long and honor
| able Democratic history"
"Oh, shucks now Major. that's
| crowdin' me too hard. subj" laughed
| Colonel Todhunter in the course OF
l his reply. Il leave IL to all you Yer
non county folks II the majors a-giy-
| in me fair play Me and him ain't
had a chance TO pow.wow together for
four or Ave years, and it's been
| longern that since had chance to
visit you.all here In old Vernon. Be
sides, you oughtn't 10 give man
such good vittles TO eat IL you want
| to get rid OF hint amt consistent"
4 Even Major Bulsom Piper, though
shaking his head TO express disap
proval of such specious pleading
joined in the laugh which greeted this
remark
MY friends and fellow-citizens." re
sumed Colonel Todhunter. Il fee
compelled to tell you that my friend
Major Piper's objections remind me
mighty forcibly of what old Judge
Lindsay of Kentucky used to say about
his niger, Jim. the biggest chicken
thief In the whole country, sub. Jim's
weakness was always gettin' the jGdgt
In trouble with his neighbors.
"'Cuss that nigger!' old Judge
Lindsay used to say, rarin' up and
down his front gallery over some new
scrape OF Jim's. He not only steals
my own chickens, sub, but I'm held
responsible for every blamed chicken
stole In this section of the state. IL
have to break that nigger's neck yet
subj
4 But the next minute the old
Judged be shakin' his fat sides laugh
in No, sub" he'd conclude at the
last, 1 won't do IL, That inferna
Niger Jim can make me laugh wher
no other human bein' can-he's cheaI
at the price, subj
And | tell you candidly, my hear
ers,' continued the Colonel, my ole
friend, Major Bulsom Piper, knows
as well AS We do that he Endorses ole
Judge Lindsay's reasonin' He bettel
keep me here at the price. He ain
laughed so much in 10 years-look a
him now. the snickerin' old hypo
critei"
| Later that day. when Major Butson
Piper hauled Colonel Todhunter owe
the Goals, privately. for turning tn,
joke on him In such a manner, Col
onel Todhunter only chuckled, linger
ing lovingly over his mint julep.
"Pll tell you one thing. Major" h,
said. You've certainly got some al
mighty fine mint patches here in Yer
non, subj"
But II was at the big barbecue II
Dunklin County, where he met the re
doubtable Bedford Giles on the stump
famous throughout the length and
breadth OF Missouri.
BEDFORD Giles was probably the I'm
est living master OF the old school o.
pcrfervid political oratory that once
30 powerfully swayed the minds o.
men in the South and Middle West
II may be true that he lacked tn,
sense OF humor, but, osetting THU
delinquency, he possessed a sort o.
leonine earnestness that had never
failed TO score tremendously In tn,
campaigns OF which he was q con
spicuous figure. The announcement o.
: a speech by Bedford Giles was In II
self sufficient to concentrate Mis-
scurians at one given. point from {
radius of twenty miles around AnC
: they were never disappointed, becaus,
this renowned spellbinder, In his tenn
permanent a ranting tragedian Of tn,
old Edwin Forrest type, invariably
tore their emotional beings to tatteri
and left them convinced for all tim,
that they had assuredly been listening
: TO the most irresistible orator OF theil
day.
Against this man was Colonel Tod
hunter pitted on the day Of the bar
. becue, and the certainty of witnessing
great encounter attracted to tn,