Arizona republican. [volume] (Phoenix, Ariz.) 1890-1930, 1911-10-08
FATE PICKS HUSBAND
ats Ridiculous" Mrs. Strauss Says,
ito Say Girls Choose
Them"

Are there two men in woman's
life-the man she loves and the man
she marries?
This is the question Juliet Virginia
Strauss asks and answers in the cur
rent number of the Ladies' Home
Journal
To me the inquiry seems conServa-
tive, writes Ethel Lloyd Patterson in
the New York Evening Mail. In a
Womans life is one man, no man or
many men. The woman who loves
but one man other than her husband
cares for him enough eventually either
to overcome or disregard the laws
which separate them, or she cares for
him SO little that, sooner or later,
he becomes but one of the many
actors who, from season to season,
fill the role of love in the puerile,
parlor drama of her life. Find the
woman who says there have been
but two men in her life-her husband
and the man she loves-and you will
have found the woman vino has loved
no marlborough.
However, Mrs. Strauss aims not to
philosophize, but to prescribe and to
instruct.
ITO some women the men they love
and the men they marry are no more
alike than the lives they live and the
lives they dream" Mrs. Strauss de-
clares. There is here strong COM
mentary upon the evil of dreaming
which is certainly one of the great
mistakes Of womankind. We have no
right to dream.
Life is before US, full of beauty.
full of suffering. full of joy, full of
sorrow. II we are not big enough
to cope with it we should not lay
the blame on the other elbow. True,
the other fellow may be in a sense to
blame. but the DETECTION of Il fellow
mortal, even though that fellow NOR
tai be our nearest and dearest. is
never a valid excuse for our failing,
too"
Yet has not Mrs. Strauss To nearly
made a nightmare Of her woman's
dreams? To be sure. brokers may
not dream while they sell their
bonds, nor beef, but where may
man and a woman meet if it be not
in their wonderful dream? To be tall
ground while ones head is in the
clouds-there is the perfect happi-
ness.
However, in another paragraph Mrs.
Strauss points out the danger of the
sordid dreams which makes "A woman
cast covetous eyes at the man who
might have made the drama come
true.
The great failing Of women in the
common walks of life is their dis
satisfaction with the things they
have" she explains. "A woman has
a longing and desire for fincry ana
she frets BECAUSE the man she has
married cannot give it to her Then
begins a general dissatisfaction all
along the line ana finally she comes to
regard herself as a fine creature. fun
OF high tastes. yet welded to an in
ferior who can never satisfy those
tastes.
\ majority Of the women you meet
in poor or common homes will tell
YOU. if they grow confidential that
they have always longed for better
things" but "he" has never been
able or else never willing to provide
them. This. ! insist. is a very unjust
attitude on our part. and one that
10y means of proper education we
might come out Of.
In the first place. it is not good !
taste that makes US long for things:
it is bad taste. Good taste is the |
quality that enables us To make !
beautiful and harmonious the things |
We have 1t is probably envy. greed !
for luxury. idle covetousness of what !
IS our neighbor's that lead us To the |
liscouraging conclusion hat in other |
circumstances we might have shone |
There is never anything but personal |
ack of fineness to keep you from |
being fine"
Which is very true, indeed, but |
may be carried too far. as, for ex-
ample, when Mrs Strauss declares:
IF a woman is going to live with |
man at all she might as well be
he wife of whatever he is" That /
lOes not follow at all, because in |
many instances it would be far better
we're the woman to make the man
he husband Of what she is But that.
# course. resolves itself into strug-
gle for the survival of the fittest
But many women" concludes Mrs. |
strauss, sadly, hold themselves in
IN attitude of fine ladyhood. and re-
gard the laboring person whom they /
ire attached to as an inferior. la
ncnting the fact that they might |,
nave done better
You can never do better han Just
with your surroundings. |
There are always soap and water to
Keep clean with, always a chance for /
honest work and for straightforward |
living in the sphere to which you
ire called. And YOU are called to
he place you are in, not to the place |
'ou wish you were in. You are /