The Washington bee., 1911-02-18
PER
CONTRA
By JOHN BERWICK

"IlLten ny hOrrld old Dachelor.J
My chum. Henry Burbank, and /
courted the girls we married at the
same time and married within a week
OF each other. AS soon as we had re-
turned from our wedding trips we met
for supper and chat.
well, Harry" / said, lis your hon.
eymoon over. or is it going to last for
ever?'
I've learned just enough about
! working in double harness to realize
that it requires adroitrass to trot
smoothly together"
so have l."
My wife seems to want to have her
own way about every little thing"
Same here"
ION our wedding trip il | proposed
TO 60 fishing she wanted that we
should play tennis. If | wished to
take an afternoon siesta she insisted
on going TO ride"
We'll. what are you going to do
about it?"
81 don't know-grin and bear it, /
suppose. How are you making out?"
We'll, l don't have exactly the same
trouble that you have. My wife is diff
ferent. If we differ about anything
she always argues and argues. and
can't stop her. If l say, It's not a
matter Of any Importance; let's stop
talking about it, she says, I want to
say just one more thing and she says
it."
"a great many timesY
YES"
The uext summer my wife went to
the country. and l, not being able to
get away, stayed at home. l dined fire.
quently with Harry and his wife. At
the first dinner l took with them the
subject of people keeping pet dogs in
the city came up, and l was surprised
to hear Harry inveigh against the
practice.
! why, I thought you loved dogs in
your bachelor days." / remarked.
Hate EN-"
Upon my word! Did you bring
about this change, Mrs. Burbank" 1
/ asked.
/ "Oh, no! like dogs. like all ami
mails"
At that moment little skye terrier
ran into the room and jumped up on
to Harry's lap. Harry ordered him
down harshly.
II want you to come round. Tom,"
said Harry, when my wifes sisters
come. They're going to make US a
visit. I'm looking forward to their
coming with a great deal of pleasure
/ Lovely girls, both Of 'em."
! That must be very nice for you,
| Mrs. Burbank" / remarked.
We'll. I'd like 1t II we had plenty
Of room and more servants and all
that. Harry's got 1t into his head that
he wants them to come. he thinks it
| lonely here-no one in the house with
him but me. l give in to him in
everything, but for once I'm going to
| have my own way"
| / looked at Harry and thought saw
q strange look in his eyes.
You see how 1 have my way" he
said, addressing me. "N1y wife has an
aunt-dearest old lady you ever met;
poor woman. hasn't any home 1 want
/ her to come here and make a home
with US"
Now, Harry, you're giving an en-
| tirely wrong impression. Aunt Mar
| tina is old and irritable. She needs to
run her own establishment. She would
not be happy here at sll. No home!
/ Why, she has a very comfortable
/ home-a small fat of five rooms"
"And not a soul in 'em," snapped
Harry. except herself. 1t must be
awful lonely"
/ When coffee was served Mrs. Bur
bank left us while we smoked. She
/ had no sooner gone than the skye ter
rier jumped into his msster's lap. and
Harry petted him as if he were a
/ spoiled child.
why, Harry" l exclaimed, Il
| thought you hated the little beast"'
Don't you give me away, old man.
If didn't make believe / hated him
he wouldn't be here. You see, I've
learned something since I've been mar
rIed. | keep a sharp lookout. and If |
see anything coming ! don't like | just
veer right round on 10 that side, and
/ the harder | blow for 1t the more de
/ termined Doll is that it shan't come
/ of. She has two hoFrid old maid sis
ters that she's been thinking Of asking
/ to come for a visit. See the way |
headed her OFF,"
"Oh that's VOur game, is It"
/ And the old aunt-if she came here
there wouldn't be any use having any
/ vinegar on the table Shed turn milk
sour She'd bring on a divorce be
/ tween Doll and me within a week.
The first thing l knew one day Doll
| began to talk about her aunt and how
| lovely she was living by herself and
how much company the old cat would
/ be for her when ] was downtown and
sometimes when have to go away on
| business. l jumped right on to the
| scheme ana swOre it should be done
/ at once. Doll doesn't like to be hur-
ried into anything. and this and my
| being for it together have put her right
| on to the other side. | tell you I'm
/ Jim dandy OF a married man. These
/ fellows who are loaded down with
/ their wife's relations don't know how