davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
Ending Easy Money"

From tie New York Times.
In the last year the Post-office De
partment has run to earth and put out
If business over eighty get-riCh-quicli
concerns. and these eighty concerns
feeced tie American public out of $780,
O09.CCo 1t is probable that the govern
mcnt can accomplish a great deal more
but the work done by the postal de-
partment is necessarily restricted to a
fraudulent usage of the mails. There
are other pitfalls from which YOU must
protect yourself.
To-day little advertising is done and
the sucker lists are almost always used.
The mails are not used nearly SO much
formerly. and agents. sent from town
to town, are the means of separating
the innocent victim from his hoard. Men
of standing and responsibility are made
use OF in many towns and they can
often be depended upon to help fleece
their neishbors for a commission of %
per cent In many cases. however, they
are themselves the innocent victims of
some master agent, who has been sent
to appoint them.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
ITALIAN POLICE METHOD.
Americans Could Learn by study o
CamOrrn Trial.
From the New York Times.

FROM Inc New Ork Times.
Strange as may seem 10 us the proce-
Gure followed in the trial of the members
of the CamOrra at Viterbo, il becomes
daily more evident that the evidence
against the prisoners has been collected
with care and intelligence, as we'll as
with wonderful patience.
Our own police could learn something
from the way in which the carabiniere
obtained possession of the ring taken
from the murdered CuoCColo's finger and
turned over to the man who had de-
manded his death. They did not content
themselves with going to the place where
they had heard it was and with taking
possession of it. That would have given
plausibilIty to the easy accusation of a
plant" Instead. they compelled friends
OF the suspect to do the searching and
the finding, and then to make signed
declaration of the exact cirCumstan noes
in which the discovery took place.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
THE SIGNATURE EXPERT.
Learns to Remember Many as
5000 on Cheeks

frnni H4TTST > NCcEt.
\ number OF the larger banking inSti-
tutions employ from one to half a dozen
men whose sole iuty i, to examine every
check that comes in through the clearing
house and vouch for the genunencaS of
the signatures. To the ordinary citizen
It seems nothing short Of marvellous that
a signature clerk will instantly recognize
tho slightest alteration in a signaIur"
with thousands Of checks passing through
his hands each day. many Of them drawn
by drpositors who sign but a few checks
in the course Of year. but an expert
signature clerk can carry in his mind
accurate photographs Of 500 or more
signatures and rarely has to refer to
the signature book. When not engaged
with tho incoming checks the s!Graturn
expert spends mis- time in familiarizing
himself with the signatures of new Gus
toners. There IS no room for uncer-
talnty in his business. In proportion 20
the number Of checks paid by large
bank every business day the smallness
of the number of bad ones tina: slip
through is nothing short of marvellous.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
Civil Pensions.

While 4 civil pension list might
weaken ambition for advancement. as
well as the fostering Of prudent habits.
it has d good deal in lis favor Secre-
tary Maclcagh says that our enormous
civil war pension list is not a credit to
Us. and that 1t never had a just basis, al
though a worthy motive gave it birth;
that It has lost its patriotic aspect and
ll2> become a political list, costing the
government about SI6o,ooo.ooo a year"
lie believes it most important that an
other pension list should be established
f:r the civil employees of the govern
mcnt."
The Secretary argues that he is ham,
pcrcd in his efforts to promote economy
through efficiency. because Of lack of
retiring list, and that the government
is losing money by paying salaries for
incficiency. in place OF having efficient
employees and a retiring list for those
whose efficiency has departed from long
and faithful service
II disability is incurred from long
service in the necessary performance of
duty. there should be due recompense
on the part of the government, as in
private employment. In fact. private
business concerns have begun to show
how this can be done with profit to the
employer as well as to the men affected.
Why should the government hesitate to
follow their example?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

From the Indianapolis star.
Senator John Kern, of Indiana. tells
this story about his late predecessor, the
late Senator Dan Voorhees,:
voorhees, frequently made the claim
that. more Democrats than Republicans
had been enrolled from Indiana in the
Union army during the civil war. on
one occasion he made the assertion in
connection with a speech in Sullivan
County.
Il guess anybody will admit that con-
siderably more than half the people who
went into the Union army from Sulli-
van County were DemocI ats. he de-
clared. with emphasis.
a Democrat down in one of the front
row had taken drink or two before he
came to the meeting. and he confirmed
Voorhees, statements.
Yes: it's true" he shouted. Col darn
it, they drafted u.s.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
The Washington Veterans.

Out of the 5000 young men who vol
unteered in the civil war from the
District of Columbia. only few remain.
Now they are gray-haired veterans, sur
vivors of a conflict which to the present
generation is a tradition.
1t was an inspiration which led these
soldiers of 1861 to celebrate yesterday
the semi-centennial anniversary of their
enlistment. 1t was also most appropriate
that President Taft and the District
Commissioners should unite in doing
them honor. Only those whose lives
have spanncd the fifty years since the
call to arms can realize the excitement
and the anxiety which prevailed in the
National Capital during the first days OF
the war Here in Washington, along the
river which marked the dividing line be-
tween the North and the South. the
situation was most intense. for in this
city the fact that the struggle was OF
brother against brother appealed with
distressing force The prompt response
OF the District citizens was remarkable
demonstration OF IoyaIty-an evidence OF
patriotism which has not been dimmed
by time.
Happily rejoicing in a united country.
and fortunately living long enough to
see the wonderful progress which has
come to Washington with the advancing
years, these volunteers OF long ago gath
cred in reminiscent celebration. They
deserve the tributes willingly rendered
to their patriotism and courage. They
set splendid example in their youth,
and now they enjoy the respect and graft
tudc of the city which is their home, and
which they would have given their lives
to save.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

From World WCrk.
Within ten years the elimina ton of
every extraneous influence in the admin
istation of the State prisons of New
York. together with the introduction of
scholastic and industrial training, has
produced an almost complete change in
the interior routine. A well-fitting gray
uniform has been substituted for the con-
viCt's former striped suit. and the mill
tary step has replaced the loCkstep. His
hair is trimmed neatly with shears. in
stead of being cut close to the scalp
with clippers. CrOckery has replaced the
old tin cups and pans in the prisons OF
the State. An ocUlist and a dentist look
after the eyes and the teeth of the pris-
Oners. An electric light in each cell has
replaced the old tal!ow candles. Infrac-
ton of rules in the New York prisons to-
day merely consigns the convict to soil
tary confinement until he reaches nor
NAL cindition of mind and signifies his
Willingness to conform to discipline. The
paddle. the rack, the ducking stool. and
all other forms of corporal punishment
have been abolished in New York's penal
institutions
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
An Excellent Dollar Investment.

We agree with the New York Sun,
that Senator Heyburn'S bill to supply
the Congressional Record to subscribers
for ST ought to be enacted into law At
the same time we desire to defend our
morning contemporary against the flip
pant and unappreciative tone which the
Sun employs.
The Congressional Record is really a
most readable publication. When tariff
bill is under discussion, its pages are
literally loaded down with a mass of
information. There arc not only stats
tics galore. but unknown and interesting
facts about every article which the
United States produces or manufac-
lures When. for instance. a score of
Senators spend an entire day discussing
the growth and importation of pincap-
pies, or when they enlightcn each other
about JapanS manufacture OF celluloid.
the average citizen is sure to add to his
sum OF knowledge In the matter OF
politics. too. the Congressional Record
IS a wade mecum. reviewing all the
history OF the past, analyzing the pres
cnt. and indulging in glorious outbursts
concerning the roseate future. As a
purveyor OF obituary oratory it stands
without a rival Prose and poetry I'LL
its columns and quotations from every
volume OF classic lore are spread upon
its pages.
1t is a remarkable daily publication,
this same Congressional Record. The
pleasantly and the satire OF debate. the
humor labeled by the insertion OF the
word applause" the retort courteous
and discourteous, the scintillation OF Wit,
the ponderous and philosophic essay-all
these are recorded with style accuracy.
Sometimes there would be an imposition
upon the subscriber in the shape Of
lengthy leave to print. but when so
much else OF value is offered for ST
the long -winded effusions which are
never delivered might even be endured
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
HE FLOORED THE LAWYER.
Former Got the Best of Argument,
Which Counsel Believed Won.

From London Tit-Bits.
A case was being tried in a country
court A horse had been stolen from a
field, and the evidence all pointed to a
certain doubtful character of the neigh
borhood as the culprit. Though his gilt
seemed clear, he had found a lawyer to
undertake his defense. At the trial the
defendants counsel expended his energy
in trying to confuse and brighten the
opposing witnesses, especially a certain
farmer, whose testimony was particu-
larly damaging. The lawyer kept up a
fire of questions, asking many foolish
ones and repeating himself again and
again. in the hope of dacoying the wit
ness into a contradiction.
You say the lawyer went on. that
you can swear to having seen this man
drive horse past your farm on the day
i'll question:"
Il can replied the witness. YEARLY,
for he had already answered the ques-
ton a dozen times.
What time was this?'
Il told you it was about the middle
of the forenoon"
But | don't want any 'abouts' or any
iiiluuitS want you u tell lHe July
exactly the time
Why" said the farmer, Il don't al
ways carry a gold watch with me when
I'm digging potatoes"
But you have a clock in the house,
haven't you?"
Yes"
Well. what time was it by that"
We'll. by that clock is was just nine
teen minutes past TO-.
You were in the field all the morn
ing?" went on the lawyer. smiling sug-
gestivey.
Il was"
How far from the house is this field?"
About half mile
You swear. do you, that by the clock
in your house it was exactly nineteen
minutes past 1872"
Il do
The lawyer paused and looked tri-
umphantly at the jury. At last he had
entrapped the witness into a contradic-
tory statement that would greatly weaken
his evidence
Il think that will do he said. with
wave of his hand; Il have quite finished
with you"
The farmer leisurely picked up his hat
and started to leave the witness box.
Il ought. perhaps. to say" he added
that too much reliance should not be
placed upon that clock, as it got out OF
gear about six months ago. and it's been
nineteen minutes past 10 ever since"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
American Money Mania.

That America and Americans are in
the clutches of money mania, insanely
striving for gold and finding recreation
in degenerate luxury such as that which
marked the early Roman empire, is the
opinion of Or. W. W. Wilson, of New
York, who was seen at the New Eb-
bitt
statistics show that the percentage
of insanity is increasing far in excess of
the increase in population" said he
This. no doubt, is because it has been
only during the past decade that care
full statistics have been kept and each
little phase of mental arrangement tab
ulated. Be this as it may. insanity is
on the increase
"'Fanaticism and Just plain foolishness
sometimes are called insanity. The man
who knows the ethics of right living
and ignores them is a fool. The fanatic
is man with an idea. living ahead OF
his time. But the insane man is the man
whose way of living is all wrong, but
who thinks it is all right: and in this
country we have the insane man at his
worst AS true as that the lust for
riches is the root of all evil is the fact
that the American has the money in
sanity He is obsessed with the idea of
accommodating more than his share of the
worlds goods. And the more of the
worlds goods that accrues. the more
there is slackening of spiritual strength.
IF for no other reason, one should at
tend church once a week to keep his
mental balance. Lose hold on the anchor
of the mind. and the drifting of the ship
is the drifting before the world storms
of evil"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
A Serious Situation in China.

AdviceS from China are to the effect
that a serious situation has been caused
by the efforts of the Chinese government.
on the one hand, to suppress opium
production. while nothing is being done
by the English government. on the other
hand, further to restrict the importation
of the drug. China has widely prohib-
itcd the growth OF the poppy, depriving its
own citizens OF a very important source
OF revenue The reduction in the area
planted has been so great that the
price of foreign opium has risen ma
terially The Chinese users of the drug
arc not only paving a heavier tax than
formerly. but they know that their
money is going into the pockets OF those
who control the English trade
1t is this fact that gives the approach
ing Hague conference on the opium
question a most serious phase. Even
those who are most earnest in suppress
ing the opium traffic feel that China is
not being fairly dealt with. as long as
the importations continue in such large
quantities. Chinese officials frankly state
that unless Great Britain co-operates
with them they will be powerless further
to check the planting OF opium and
that all the efforts which have been so
sincerely inauguratcd are likely to be Of
no avail The poor Chinese farmers
cannot understand why they should be
forbidden to raise the opium plant when
the product OF the East Indian planta-
tons is brought into China in large Con-
SignmentS.
The sympathy of The civilized world is
with China in its dilemma, ard there
will be a universal hope that Great
Britain will do its utmost to eradicate
the blight which opium has stamped
upon the celestial empire.
When it comes to foreign names. we
fail to see any difference between the
OLD Mexican cabinet ard the new.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
CURIOUS BITS OF HISTORY
By A. w. MACY.
THE GREAT CAT HOAX.

Every generation has it's prac-
tical jokers. In the year 1915,
shortly before the departure of
Napoleon for st. Helena. some
person in the city of Chester,
England. caused hundreds of
handbills to be scattered through
out the city announcing that the
Island of St. Helena was overrun
with rats, and that an immense
number of cats were wanted to
exterminate them. Those having
cats for sale were advised to be
on hand with them at a certain
place on a certain day. Sixteen
shillings would be paid for each
full-grown tomcat ten shillings
for each full-grown tabby, and
two shillings sixpence for each
kitten that could feed itself. The
result was astonishing. On the
appointed day the city was liter
ally crowded with people carrying
cats; men, women, and children
from the surrounding country. A
riot ensued. and about 1000 cats
were killed. The rest got away,
and for long time afterward the
city and surrounding country was
infested with cats Of all kinds,
breeds, and descriptions The
perpetrator Of the hoax wisely
kept IN the background
Copyright, 1911. BY joseph B. Bowiss)
To-morrow-sAA Albino King
q EnglaAa.p
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
Fast Trains I'm Europe.

From the SC1entlhc AmcTlcan.
Express speed in Great Britain and on
the Continent is high. In Great Britain
there are eleven daily express trains
making runs of from 80 to lis 3-S miles
without stop. whose average speed is
from 81 10 $50 miles an hour. The
fastest and longest nonstop run is 225 81
miles. from Paddington to Plymouth.
made at 5i.S miles an hour. France has
seven daily expresses that run from
a. 3-4 to 147 1-2 miles without a stop at
speeds of from ST. to els miles an hour,
and there are nine French trains that
run from 10e to IA 3-4 miles without
stop at speeds of from 5o.i to 59.3 miles
an hour.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

From Harper's Magazine.
The sea, as all the world knows, Is
salt 1t is sailed where strong dry winds
blow across the surface. as. for in
stance. in the trade-wind regions and in
the Mediterranean and the Red Sea. 1t
is less salt toward the poles and in the
deeper layers of the ocean. 1t has long
been known that the very salt water of
the Mediterranean flows as an under
current outward through the Strait of
Gibraltar, and thus affects the salinity Of
the deeper waters of the Atlantic over
a wide area. Although the amount of
salt in sea water varies. the compost
ton of sea salts remains very constant:
slight differences have, however, been
noticed along the continental coasts, in
the polar regions, and in the deep water
in direct contact with deep-sea deposits.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
4 FRANK ADMISSION.

Art for arts sake may ham
| want my hire.
lis not for JOY l twang
The tuneful Tyre.
| am 10 fine but fraved
Poetic dub:
I'm in the poetry trade
For grub.
No chap can keep alive
On art itself
4 fellow must Contrive
To gather pelf.
| want no loud applause.
Nor any bays:
] deal in verse because
II NAYS
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

Here is reciprocity with the lid of. a
Connecticut man who had been appointed
State pharmacy commissioner. il was as
Certained. is not an American citizen. but
a British subject. Gov Baldwin says it
made no difference whether the APP
pointee was a citizen or not.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

Rev. A. Eugene Bartlett. of Chicago,
who recently made a tour of Europe.
was seen a the Arlington. He said
that Berlin lad outstripped Paris and
London. and that in many respects it
surpasses Chicago.
Berlin is the Chicago of Europe"
said Rev. Mr. Bartlett. In many ways
It has surpassed US: yet Chicago has
finer stores and more and better play
grounds for it's children. Berlin is a
more beautiful city than Chicago and
has more intelligent conception of
beauty as developed in a city center
and radiating out from there to all
points of the municipality. Our thought
of a beautiful city seems to be limited
to a big civic center and boulevards and
parks.
Berlin has realized that extensive
beauty is necessary. and lawns and
flower gardens border the streets. not
only along the lines of the bouIevards.
but in many different sections of the
city. Statuary and fountains are not con-
fined to central squares but are scat
tered with lavish hand throughout the
city. Berlin understands that a beauti-
full city is one in which all sections fit
tremendously into one perfect whole.
Berlin has comfort stations. while we,
10 our discredit, sadly neglect these hu-
name public necessities. Berlin has a
line of auto-buses that make a circuit
of the boulevards. These buses relieve
in part the congestion of subways and
elevated and surface cars. but, better
still, afford the common people a chance
to see their own boulevards and parks
Berlin knows how to keep the city clean
and does it. Relief agencies are thorough
~ organized in 80 districts, and more
than 900 citizens are doing volunteer
work ~
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

Who is well enough posted in mathe-
mates to solve this little problem? II
the original cost of the Albany capitol
was estimated at S4.OO0.OOO. and it cost
some S27.0o0.Co0 without being finished en-
tirely. what will he the ultimate cost of
restoration upon an estimate of 81. 900 OOO?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
simple Life in New York.

Firm the New Yo:k Tribune.
The fierce, unbridled horse car is still a
menace to the peace and safety Of the
metropolitan dwelier. The spectacle Of
one of those archaic chariots running
anluck through the streets of New York
is enough to cause the stoutcst heart to
tremble.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
Smoothing Rough Places.

from the DaIIas NtWt.
II it is true that King George has
agreed to make a formal call on Richard
Croker on the occasion of the Kings
visit to Ireland. 1t ought to do a great
deal to bridge the chasm between the
British throne and Tammany Hall
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

Hair CT a different color from that of
the wifes is rather delicate basis for
divorce suit Yet it has served its pur-
pose well out in Kansas. They are pro-
greSSive out there, sure enough
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
She Was n Sight.

Did You fall in love with your wife
at first sight?''
Not on Your life! When I first met
her sheath gowns were in style
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

Chicago boasts of one fact to disprove
the theory that the Western metropolis
is decadent. II has quite a number of
families with seven children and more
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

There is one thing about the. Socialist
party in Congress that will be the envy
OF the others. He" can hold a caucus
at any time and commend a unanimous
vote on any question.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
4 Legal Wind.

NO use whispering soft nothings to
that girl She's a law student"
How does that affect her case?''
We'll. she's prompt to detect the in
competent. the irrelevant, and the i'm
material"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

If we are to believe a man who claims
that he knows, there is neither a million
aire nor a pauper in North Dakota.
That would mean a veritable paradise
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11

You have been living too high. You
have violated natures laws, and must
Fay the penalty"
oh, come now. Doc. Get out an in
junction or something"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
silent for Once.

Did your wife jump on you when you
got home late last night?"
NO; for once was in luck. The peo-
pie in the fiat next door were having a
spat, and my wife was busy listening"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
II Is Characteristic.

From the Chicago Record Herald.
People pay s.7.ooooco for a State house
and then let it burn down because few
wires are not properly covered. 1t seems
careless doesn't IL?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1911-04-11
The Question.

Are we making history" inquired the
Mexican insUrgent.
What a question. general
Il ask ii seriously. Are we making
history or just a few films for the NOV
ing picture people,"