The Birmingham age-herald., 1911-07-13
"HE long-awaited memoirs of Nat C.
 Goodwin, relating chiefly to the dis-

r1HE long-awaited memoirs of Nat c. Goodwin, relating chiefly to the dis-
 = tinguished comedian's matrimonial ventures and adventures, have come to light at las. correspondent at Los Angeles sends a New York newspaper excerpts from the forthcoming book, which he says MT. Goodwin has just co.n- pleted at his Santa Monica home. If other chapters are as bright as that deal ing with the authors experiences in Eng land, where he went unwillingly through some social shopping to please Mrs. Goodwin, large royalties await a new author. At "Jackwood,' MT. Goodwin's English home, he was busy hiring guests" and found great difficulty in secuFlng pat | rons.'' There were plenty of Americans, | of course, who would gladly have accept l ed his hospitality, but the then Mrs. | Goodwin had the English bee in her | bonnet and insisted we must try and get | together some of tile impecunious nobility and a few army men as guests.' | To quote further:
 | these particular branches of society, and had no desire to, but, being under her l hypnotic influence, sought woman, the | wife of a friend of mine, an American | mining man, who, I discovered, knew all | the swagger members of the guards-one very particular one-and through her in | nuence one of these 'sapheads' was per- I suaded to visit our humble home from Saturday to Monday. He came, accom- panied by one of the present Dukes of England (whose father, by the way, died ewing me paltry s2OO0, borrowed on the | race course at Deauville, France). "They all came down this particular | Saturday in conjunction with Mime. Mel | ba and Haddon Chambers. We had a lovely time tthat is, I presume they did), as my wife insisted on my entertaining | the guests between courses with my sup posedly funny stories. Generally after 1 the telling of each one, which occupied some little time. my portion of the feast was either cold or confiscated by the butler Very little attention was paid to me, any way, only when reciting anec- dotes, and the first of every month when the bills. became due"
 | Mr. Goodwin says that being on par ticulary good terms with the butler" he selected him for his companion and strolled through the upper rose terrace discussing the menu for the next influx of English guests while the pale moon cast its rays over his memorandum book.
 Quite casually heard, as we passed | a window, the remark:
 "How could you have married such a
 vulgar little person?'
 | "Louis,' I said to the butler, that 5 me that chocolate soldier is referring to. -
 The oetsion of Mir. Goodwin's vul-
 garity and tiresomeness was mooted be- tween Mrs. Goodwin and the guardsman. According to the author, his wife held out
 somewhat stubbornly that her husband was not really vulgar little person and that he was amusing in that he told un-
 commonly good stories.
 The conversation continues:
 "IIe-Well, maybe. but was deafened
 by your beauty. I saw nothing but those
 reauteous eyes of yours, my dear Mrs
 Goodwin and everything else was a
 blank. Really T'--
 "She-Now, don't pay me silly compli' ments, Lord A; it isn't necessary.
 "He-I beg your pardon, but please tel
 me how did you happen to marry tna' funny little man?"
 "She-Now, don't ask impertinent ques' tons: one has to get married; and' reaiiy when he talks he says something "He-Does he-really"
 The butler and the host resumed theil
 stroll.
 "Jackwood' cost Mr. Good"'h ~c'"" "
 buy. s15,O0O year to keep up' ana s-o"' , to get rid 6f" "The comic little man o'' ! one thing" he concludes, Wr'u'hg "''i wry face or contented grin, the reaoe' i wonders which, "and that was 10 lauhci his wife in English society They repai'