davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28
UNSUNo, YET HEROES.
Man Who First Ate an Oyster Emit
tied to Monument.

What were the sensations Of that
long ago human who ate the first oys-
teri
What were the feelings Of the man
who first Of all drank a bowl OF fer
mented fruit juice?
What was the standing I'm the tribe
Of the first merry Jester, Of the man
who perpetrated the original Seven
Jokes. that are still knocking about
the world In a million nimsy dis
guises?
There are "A lot Of ugly and inarts-
tic monuments I'm existence. They
keep green the memories Of certain
individuals who were supposedly great
heroes. The greatest hero OF them all,
however. had no monument. no MEM
OTial Of stone or brass. He lived a
lou, long time ago. before monuments
b'rlme fashionable The man who
at the first oyster. who felt the first
cool and pulsating folds slip down his
esophagus. was man of awesome
courage
An oyster is an ugly and loathsome
looking thing. They all look poi5on-
Gus. menacing and dangerous. OF all
forms Of sea food they appear least
likely 10 agree with the human di-
gestlye organs. The squcamlsh in
dividua1 naturally recoils, even yet.
from the oyster In the raw and un-
cooked state They have a habit OF
turning q copperish green under due
prOvocation.
They look like agony. slow torture
and lingering death. until you get
used 10 their appearance Consider,
then. how courageous that gentleman
~ the long ago must have been when
he tilted the first shell-clad denizen
Of the deep 90 his lips and gulped 1t
down.
Possibly there was famine In the
land and the little green melons that
grew on the hllltops over the tribal
cave village had failed Maybe Me
fish had gone out to sea on some mys-
terious migration and gaunt hunger
was stalking through the -fioored
caves.
Anyway. some one Of the hairy gen.
Grafton went wandering along the
shallow water OF the beach and found
this forbidding looking bivalve that
now figures in the bills OF fare from
the glittering restaurant to the church
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

For the third time In the history OF
the country. a conference OF the gov
errors OF the states of the Union is to
be held in New Jersey next month.
We note with distinct pleasure that
Governor Osborn is to play prom
inent part in the proceedings. says the
Grand Rapids Herald. with mis- SPLEEN
did Initiative and vigorous aggression.
Governor Osborn is qualified To lead
in a movement which shall have for
its aim the perpctuation of these an
nuaI conferences OF governors as a
permanent yearly institution. This
will be the first conference at which
a governor of Michigan has taken
prominent part. We are proud OF the
ambassador who will represent us on
this occasion; and we are hopeful that
his participation in the activities al
Spring Lake, New Jersey, next month
mas aid In crystallizlng into perma-
neut form the proposition that per-
mshent house of governors. through
thorough practical ventilation Of pub
lie problems and through a general
nation wide study, may tremendously
advance the conservative theory Of
states rights within its legitimate
realm.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

There is every indication at this
time that Henry l.. StimsOn. will be
Mr.. Tafts running mate next year. As
vice-president Mr.. Sherman has not
filled the bill to the satisfaction Of
Mr.. Taft and the low tariff men. and
he has openly opposed Canadian re-
ciprocity. lnasmuch as the republican
national convention in 1912 promises
TO be controlled by low tariff men who
will nominate Mr.. Taft, it does not
seem possible that Mr. Sherman will
be selected.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

''all in," yet had still the two hard
est stages of my journey TO cover
the bitter fight Of jumping and falling.
jumping and falling. during the final
300 feet, and last, but most awful of
all, the horrors of that descent where
the chances were 100 to against me.
Laughing at 10000 Feet.
There was nothing for it. however.
but to continue the fight upward.
So doggedly fixed my mind upon
the magic figures 10000 and mounted
again. Below me there was nothing
but space. The filmy clouds formed %
haze which completely shut the earth
from my view. and 1 seemed like an
impudent little 1y buzzing around Inn
portantly In the vastness of infinitude.
The thought struck me as being rather
droll, and laughed aloud.
Then 1 remembered how a friend OF
mine had come TO me ut the hangar
before l started and, with a quizzical
expression on his face. as though he
knew was not serious. asked:
-'Are you really going for altitude to.
day?"
"Yes," answered.
"Do you think you have any chance
OF making it?" he asked.
There's always q chance" replied
and Jumped into the machine
Since then have thought over that
short conversation a score OF times and
! have failed to find In Il anything
amusing. Yet away up there in a lone
Illness whose vastness and impressive
ness only Legagneaux and 1 of all liv-
ing men can appreciate. with the mo-
tor buzzing and whirling and humming
and splitting. seemingly to accentuate
the very vastness Of the solitude and
make 1t even more awe inspiring than
It is to the floating balloonist-away
up there, passing close to the 1900 foot
mark-the two questions and their an
swers struck me as being the most
droll things I Ind ever heard, and I
started 70 laugh bolsterously like a
drunken sailor in a low taproom.
Crazy" thought, and az the
thought dashed across my mind with
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

ICopyright, 1911, by Henry NJ. Nicely.
Copyright I'm Great Britain and Canada
All rights reserved.l
- Il was on the train between Phila-
delphia and New York. | had
"a Just received confirmation of lay
altitude record of 9.S97 feet-the
highest man had ever been in an aero
plane-and had read in the evening
papers that my great ambition to be
the first 10 go up above the coveted
10000 mark would never be realized.
for Legagneaux had risen 10.499 that
afternoon.
"Well." i heard one man say to an
other. they have settled Drexers rec
ord beyond all question now. Here's
fellow who has beaten him by 800
feet"
"Yes." said the other, 1T seems to
get easier every day."
Easy! A man climbs and climbs
and strains every nerve and muscle to
the breaking point-he fights inch by
inch, forcing frail machine beyond
anything 1t was ever intended to do
he hears the creaking Of the wood
work and the wicked singing Of the
tautening wires, and he knows that
one little ounce more of strain some
where. anywhere, and It will all be
over IN the most horrible Of ends-he
plugs onward and upward, sick at
heart and In body, utterly weary and
hopeless. nerves gone, strength ebbing
fast, brain dizzy, ears bursting and
eyes swimming until a momentary
spell of near Inconsistencies makes
him pull himself together for the
awful hell of that final plunge to
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

The recall Of judges Is still an aca-
domic question that probably won't be
much more than a subject for debate
for some time 10 come, even n a
state or two here and there does try IL.
but whatever one may think about
the judicial recall. there isn't the
slightest bit Of doubt that there Is
one Judge In this country that ought
To be recalled. and that as soon as II
can be done. Furthermore. there r.
no need OF any new law TO bring IL
about, remarks the Duluth Herald
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

Bryan says that he will not be silent
when the time comes for naming the
next Democratic presidential candl-
date. When the time comes that the
Lincoln spellbinder Is silent he'll be
out Of his paying job as a chautauqua
lecturer and be speedily forgotten.
Bryan's tongue has been his biggest
asset
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

The name OF the judge VINO ought
TO be recalled Is Lynch-Judgc Lynca
and the sooner the American people
yank him on his street corner and
back alley bench the better. Unless
they do recall him. such incidents as
that i'm Pennsylvania, where mob
dragged a negro out OF a hospital and
burned him. and that in Oklahoma
where 5000 men. women and children
cheered while a mob burned negro,
will put this country on the plane OF
civilization that Turkey and Russia
occupy.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28
HE KNEW JIM.

Jim had made an unsuccessful at
tempt to conquer the world and came
back to the Tennessee town dirty,
worn out and hungry.
"Uncle John" he said melodramati-
cally, II came home to die"
mo, dod CAST you" said unsympa-
thetic Uncle Jim. you came home to
eat."-From Success Magazine"
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28
f%<%%-$-%-%-'
! No Beef to
! Export
! In the
! Future
Will Need
It All
For
Ourselves


J.. ARMOUR. Millionaire Packer I
-
<W UNITED STATES SOON
GOING TO UNABLE EXPORT
" TRADE
Our wealth and population growing to SUCH AN
EXTENT that We will tho ENTIRE DOMESTIC
PRODUCT for our home consumption
South America is exporting GREAT QUANTITIES of
Europe going Austria Italy and the southern
OF Germany buying outside meat the laws for
bidding All the beef used in that country from within its
borders.
can't ohand just what the proportion of increase in the
expor; product from South America is but growing ENOR
MOUSLY.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

Accordine 70 Rep. George Lord Of
Detroit, WIN appeared before the state
board Of equalization TO protest against
the tax commissions figures. Wayne
county has reached the limit OF pa
thence. Wonder what Wayne county in
tends to do about II. Secede from
Michigan?
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

brain cells. The man who originated
the original seven merry jests was
in far greater mental
agony His shade will have a lot to
answer for when the rest of human
the StyX. But he was a brave soul,
for he was an original.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28

There are some people beginning to
concedo that Mr.. Taft may be right as
well as president.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28
MONDAY, AUGUST %, 1911.

T. Follette's presidential boom is
makins a noise like a squib firecracker.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28
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The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1911-08-28


Later came the dismaying announce
ment that test Of my Paragraph III
rough reading Of which had showed
approximately 9,97O feeo gave me only
q little more than 0.400 feet. But the
officials Of the Aero Club Of Pennsyl'
vania. under whose auspices the flight
had been made. were sure that a mis-
take had been made somewhere and
so turned the instrument over to
George s. Bliss, head Of the United
States weather bureau In Philadel-
phia. To the interchangeable and gener-
Gus efforts Of this official we owe the
fact that the final official reading or
9.S97 feet was given after tests to
which no Paragraph had ever been
subjected before. That was the worlds
record for only a short time. for day
or two later came Legagneaux's won
derful feat, when he assembled 10.499
feet and made II impossible for me to
realize my fond hope Of being the frst
man to pass the 10000 mark.
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16
DANCING GOOD FOR
 MENTAL DISEASES
DOCTOR GAYS IT AWAkENS FAC. UlTlES OF THE FEEBLE
 AND WEAK MINDED.

LONDON - The latest cure for feeble-mindedness is dancing. This is the view taken by Dr. J. s. Far Hiall institution.
 For many hours at two days conference in Birmingham, experts of more or less experience had been proposing all sorts of drastic meas, ureS and cCndemning the feeble minded to a dreary existence as per manent prisoners, deprived of the society and companionship of the opposite sex, and treated as a danger 70 the community.
 Dr. Fairies, who rose towards the end of the conference, cheerfully up- set all these theories. He saw no reason for separating the sexes; on the contrary. he believes in their enjoyment of one another's society He has great faith in the value of dancing in the awakening of slum- bering intelligence and in the bring ing of intellectual life and proper understanding to the mind hitherto vicious CT merely vacant. Dancing is word which occupies a Dromi- iltHt BtSllloL Oll HIS illilc ldDltS. HIS audience laughed when he told them this, but the doctor was serious.
 Nothing. he urges. gives the feeble minded child more confidence, or in fuces better behavior, than danc- ing. He believes that such children should be taught dancing as soon as they are capable of learning it. "NOt hing" he said, gives them manly thoughts more quickly" Be sides in it they are able to find en- tertainment independent of outside help. Cricket and football had prov ed a complete failure, but since the introduction of dancing Dr. Fairies finds that the children are showing an awakening of interest in these ether pastimes.
 Dr. G. A. Auden, medical officer, Birmingham education committee, is for permanent control as an institu- tiOn, which is to be neither a jail nor an asylum of the feeble-minded, believing. as he does, that the depri- vation of liberty is not felt by reason of their intellectual limitations He desires that every imbecile should be regarded as a potential criminal.
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16

Moran will agree 10 fight the champion al any time the latter says the word. To show that we mean business I will post 5000 ~to bind the match as soon as Vol gast says the word He can name all the terms, weight, place and so on or course, l will not stand for his insisting on naming the club, referee and tying Morans hands. All Owen needs k an honest referee and his own hands If Wolgast will wire in reply 10 this challenge that he fight is on. | will post my money. Then il will be up to him 10 come through with q forfeit of the same size and there will only be lit the necessity of finding a battling ground | insist on Vol gast putting up money for the req. $ that he is very apt 10 break a lead pencil or another bone in his wrist as the date of the bout approaches
 As far as he other challcngers of Moran go. l van. to say that there is no chance for any of them to get a match until after Moran meets Wclgast We are after the lightweight title aud mean to have il. After Moran beats Wolgast any man ill the world can have a fight. l. will be case of first come first served
 Marc, who i- challenging. is not entitled to a fight. for he is a poor drawing card. But lcr him show where there is auv money in fight ing him and he can have a match after Moran k ehampi H."
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16
RAREBIT HAS
 4 DEFENDER
SECRETARY WILSON IN A NEW BULLETIN SAYS IT IS A
 GOOD FOOD ARTICLE.

The department of agriculture is advancing 10 the defense of the Welsh rarehit Having proved by excessive experiments with the re spiration calorimeter a double walled, heat-prcof rom connected with electrically driven instru ents of wondous precision - that raw cheese is easily digested. the de partment will begin Wcrk in he near future to prove that the Welsh rare bit is grossly maligned and mis- understood.
 At the conclusion of the expert ments Secretary Wills Il will issue a bulletin explaining how to prepare a rarebit according 10 the official gov ernment formula with beer or without.
 The department of agriculture has conducted many strange tests with it's poison squad and other volunteer subjects. but even it's own experts admit that there never has been anything quie SC remarkable or complete as the cheese and Welsh rarebit experiments.
 The cheese tests have been going Uu lOI q al put lIit tAltI iS htll the secret well. It has just become known. now that the official Welch rarebit report is in preparation, that volunteer subjects have been boxed up and fed on cheese for days at a time - American cheese, English cheese, new cheese and old cheese, fragrant cheese. and other cheese and that enc subject lived on bread and cheese alone for more than a year and suffered no ill ef- leCts. Moreover, the experts are convinced, although the actual eX- periments with cooked cheese are only about to begin, that what has been proved true of the raw pro- duct is equally true Cf the rare bit
 The departments official cheese cook book, supplementing the meat cook book issued some time ago, will contain doZ ns of receipts for cheese dishes.
 But the leading chapter in the book will be devoted to recipes for making and the reasons for eat ing the melancholy and misunder stood rarebit.
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16
TAXES TWO YEARS
 ID COME BACK
NEGRO, SHANGHAIED AFTER A SPREE, GOES ON VOYAGE
 LASTING TWO YEARS.

NEW YORK, Dec. 9. There were many interesting passengers aboard the American liner New York when she arrived from English French and Irish shores, but the most romantic figure was big, gingerbread colOred negro, Alfred sel was dubbed The Wandering Coon.'
 The simple matter of a Saturday nights spree had sent Stark on a tWo-year cruise to strange lands far away from Petersburg. Va. where he had worked as a peanut roaster, unassailed at any time by Wanderlust or any spirit of adven- ture. His pay night pleasure outings previously had been satiated with beer, But on this night he took whisky and was shanghaied. He was destined to see no goober works for twenty-four months, in which in voluntary journeys took him to re mote Oriental ports and to many places in Europe. He has travelled more than 15,000 miles
 After his hay night at Petersburg he says he awOke to find himself cn the British steamship Cunexa, under a written contract to make the trip to Glasgow He had worked as fireman in the goober establish ment and was put in the stoke hole He was discharged at Glasgow and appealed to the United States con- sul. The consul, as the best he could do, found a berth for Stark aboard the British steamship Spar row, bound for Smyrna He also gave the negro a letter to the Amer ican consul there, asking that ofti- cial to find a job for Stark on some steamship bound for America.
 The consul at Smyrna placed the man aboard an American steamship, the New Jersey. This cruised among the ports of the Grecian archipelago, then went to Beyrut and Jaffa, the port Jerusalem. back to smyrna and then to Constantinople There he was shipped aboard a Turkish vessel to Alexandria, and the consul there passed him along to the consul at Marseilles
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16
'B|TTEREST PILL"
 GETS HIS
BAD BILL" EAIlEY'S BLUFF IS CALLED AND BILL GOES
 HOME.

JACKSON, Ky. Dec. 10. - Bad Bill' Bailey entered the store of John C. Shepherd at Wilhurst. Breat- hit county. about week ago and announced that he was about the "bitterest pill that ever trod shoe leather in Bloody Breathitt'"
 NIT. Shepherd who had a "mix-up" with Bad Bill' on another occa- sion and had received a knife wound that would have killed an average man. essayed to call Bad Bill's" bluff the moment he announced him selm at his dry goods emporium ' Ihe fight was on at once and after q volley of dozen shots Bad Bili' Bailey had been sent home" He received wounds in his heart and brain which ended his career.
 Shepherd was also wounded dur ing the fight.
 II is said that Bailey's body re mained where it fell for twenty four hours before being placed into q coffin. Bailey. it is said was decid- edlY unpopular in the community in which he lived.
 Shepherd is said to be the under guard of a deputy sheriff. His trial has heeu postponed twice on account of the difficulty of the commonwealth is having in summoning witnesses to appear against him.
 Shepherds trial will not take place until the county judge of Breathitt returns from Paris. where he is to appear as witness in the Abner mur- der trial now in progress at that place.
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16

about thirty hybrid beasts, lion-tig
 rs. fathered by the lion Nero. I'm sorry 70 say We only succeeded q in HrinsinG up four of these hybrids but We can do better now There are four in those cages, three males and a female Interesting aren't they2"
 Interesting they certainly were great. powerful brutes. more like lions than tigers. but without fine manes and markings. and. on the who'll, scarcely an improvement on H7fuTc's model. yet vastly import ant as suggesting wonderful results that may he obtained by a blending f wild races. Perhaps HagenbeCk nlay succeed in producing new ami mals - news kinds Cf buffalos, d CT ani elopes and ostriches. as strange and beautiful as the new flowers that Burbank has produced in Cali fornia Why not?-From "A Won
 erful Wild Animal Farm" in Metro p0litan Magazine.
The Alaska citizen., 1911-01-16
Timely Hints for the Housewife

of rich milk a tablespoonful of but. ter and q tablespo nful of flour. well sifted. When smooth pour this sauce over the beans and add two we'll beaten eggs. with a little more salt and pepper, if necessary. Put the mixture into well-buttered baking dish; cover the top with powdered bread crumbs, dot with butter and Lake until Drowned
 Bean Loaf.
 Rehcat and drain the contents Cf a can of lima beans. Press the beans through colander and season to taste with salt and pepper. Add enough cream to enable you to mold the mixture into the form of a little loaf: place this in a small baking pan. sprinkle the tGp with bread crumbs. dot with butter and bake brown. Tomato sauce may be used to moisten the beans instead of the cream previously suggested. or when the cream is used in moistening the loaf as an accompaniment. Left Ov.r gravy from meat or poultry also makes an acceptable sauce for this loaf. Garnish with greens. Serve hot As a luncheon dish. bean loaf is con- sidercd delicate and appropriate to serve as an ontree
 How 10 Clarity Consomme.
 Put in soup pot four pounds of chopped beef, a glassful of cold water. and the whites of two eggs. stifily beaten. Pour in very slowly prepared beef broth, put the pot on the stove and stir frequently. When il starts to boil. stand ii on the side and allow ii to simmer for two hours. Skim off the fat, take from the fire, and let stand for fiftee en minutes. then strain through a nap kin and colander. very slowly Keep in a cool place.
 Beef Broth for Consomme.
 Ten pounds of the shin Of beef. a knuckla of veal, salt. two onions with cIove stuck in each, two car rots. three leeks, one turnip. one parsnip. a stalk of celery. parsley root. and six quarts of cold water. Boil, remove all the scum. cover and set back on the stove to simmer gently for four hours and then strain through a cloth.
 Cream of Vegetable Consomme.
 Chop very fine one white onion. two carrots, two turnips. a little white of celery and leeks. fry in but ter, add salt and pepper and quart of broth. Let cook enc hour. Press through sieve, the vegetables Will remain only, for the broth will have cooked away. Put this in a vessel and beat in the yolks of six eggs and two whole ones. Butter one large or several small molds. fill with this preparation and lay them in pan with boiling water in it. set on the top of the stove and lei boil once and hen put in the oven to bake fCr twenty minutes, remove and allow to cool.
 A Good Meat Relish.
 Two quarts of green tomatoes, enc cupful of chopped onions. one cup ful of celery, one tablespoonful Cf salt, one half cupful granulated su- gar. one green pepper, One-half tea spoonful Cayenne pepper. one pint vinegar Measure tomatoes after putting through chopper. then put one toaspoonful C hatIu5 soda in hem. Put on stove and heat, then rinse once in cold water; this keeps he tomatoes nice green. Add all he ingredients. B"il one hour.