davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
Gilbert and Punch.

When the late W. S. Gilbert wrote
THE Yarn of the Nancy Bell he sent
1t to London Punch, but the editor re-
turned it as being too bloodthirsty, for
1t will be remembered that "the elder
ly naval man" had practically eaten
all Of the Nancy's crew except him
self, whereupon Gilbert sent the bal
lad to Fun, which accepted it with de-
light. Gilbert never forgave the in
suit he considered he had received
from the editor Of Punch and consist
emily refused to contribute to its pages
up to the time of his death.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
Aeeeptina tho Inevitable.

Wonderful are the Hindus for ac-
cepting the inevitable Tell one of
these that he must take castor oil, and
he will drain the oleaginous cup to the
dregs and smack his lips. Tell him
that his leg must be amputated, and he
will present the limb for dismember-
ment and smile as he sees it severed.
Tell him that he is TO be hanged, and
with no touch Of emotion whatever he
will reply, 80 hookm'' C'whatever is
ordered'), Just as if he had been told
that he must have his corns cut
Blackwood's Magazine.
The Same Hole.
An inexperienced young fellow was
called upon to make a speech at ban
quet at which Speaker Cannon was
present In fact, the speaker sat next
to the young man.
Gentlemen" began the young fell
low, my opinion is that the generality
of mankind in general is disposed to
take advantage Of the generality off,
The speaker grabbed the boy by the
arm and, pulling him down to him,
said:
"Sit down, son. You are coming out
of the same hole you went in."-Ex-
change.
All Doing the Same.
what is he so angry at you for"
81 haven't the slightest idea. We met
on the street and we were talking just
as friendly as could be when all Of a
sudden he fiared up and tried to lick
me-"
And what were you talking about?"
ooh, just ordinary small talk. 1 re-
member he said, I always kiss my
wife three or four times every day."
And what did you say?"
81 said, I know at least a dozen
men who do the same and then he
had fit"-Houston Post.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
Resentment.

Did you scy was cheap trick
ster?" asked the ward worker.
"No, l didn't" replied the man who
is close to the boss. Il merely said
you were trickster."
"Well, that's all right, but don't you
ever inslnuate that / am doing a cut
rate business. "-WashingtOn Star
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
Hard 70 Kill


IN a,liSator's tenacity of life is re.
marsabl' Il remember one time"
s''ys IN English traveller in India, al
stS with shooting party on the
talpEcS. when the natives brought in
SIN io"t alligator. They hoped some
#ne would want to buy It: but no one
-. 80 IL was determined TO kin the
r"H ere. lt was hauled out OF the
tank and tied to a tree. Bullets from
small rife or an ordinary twelve bore
gun seemed TO only irritate the sau-
rian, and he did not seem to care very
much when native thrust a spear
down his throat. Finally they were
obliged 10 get axes and chop or its
head Even then the tail thrashed
around. and the body was almost cut
TO pieces before all movement ceased"
Sound Logic.
n little boy living on East Seventy
ninth street did a naughty thing the
other day. He got Ratchet and chop
ped Off the tail OF the family cat. His
mother punished him severely for the
barbarous act, and then she tried con.
scientiously to make him comprehend
its enormity.
Bernard" she said, what is the
Golden Rule?'
DO unto others what you would
have others do unto you" he quoted
glibly.
And did you follow the Golden Rule
when you tortured that poor catg"
Il sure did, mamma. If had a tail,
wouldn't l want somebody To cut IL
of|-ClevelRnd Plain Dealer.
Size of the Roman Empire.
According TO the historian, Gibbon,
the Roman empire was above 1000
miles in breadth, from the walls Of
Antonius and the northern limits Of
Docia to Mount Atlas and the Tropic
of Cancer; that it extended in length
more than 5000 miles, from the west
ern ocean 10 the Euphrates; that 1t
was situated in the finest part OF the
temperate zone, and that 1t was sup
posed to contain above 900. 900 square
miles"
According to this, the Roman EN-
pire was considerably smaller than
the United States, the area OF which
Qeaving out Alaska and the islands,
is nearly 100000 square miles or al
most twice as big as was the empire
OF the Caesars
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
a Tradedv

slow did you like my new tragedyT
Tragedy? thought it was COM
edy."
$50 did | till got my check for the
DrOfitC
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
Paradoxical.

"All this time the cashier was burn.
ing the candle at both ends"
"And keeping 1t dark. Well, / de-
clarew-Exchange.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

.-.,-r wAgHINGTION 8 MINUTES
LAA ~ " AFTER ZACH HOUR
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

,v.yF BALTIMORE IS MINUTES
Liza HEFORE EACH HOUR.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

..-ga,s and information apply at our
w ~, o.rcr.s West street Station, Car
eYg.'l1 Maryland Hotel, WIN. II. Moss and
ys., nl - Green OHce Z. s. y. A, for officers,
J. n1.r-6.ea, etc. connected with Naval
Academy.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
OSTEOPATHIST.

DR. H. A. McMA1Ns, Osteopathic
Physician of Baltimore, will be in Anna
polls on each TUESDAY AND FRIDAY.-
Phone 435-m, Annapolis. s153t
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

.-.,.s earlier from Naval Academy gate
. go. 80 earlier from Governors Mansion
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

-g-,r,,. FITN DIRECT 10 HEART OF
a. iiftrINORE AND WASHINGTON.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
|FTTTEU VIII " IhEIstao.I
york RIVER LINE"
Tg4AN IgPAsSENGE R STEAM Frs carry
t1s r. b. Mail for WEST POINT and
s's RICHMOND. VA.

.,.,usrs leave Baltimore Tuesday, Thurs
AZ srJ saturday. at 8 OJ y. IN. and arrives
- Point az 7.4j a. N. and Richmond at
steamer calls az Gloucester Point, York
- Temcuts. clay Bank and Almonds.
TEkyFEs LEAVE BALTIMORE FROM
prtRS rs und ~ LIGHT STREET WHARF.
Tbrouyh tickets 10 all points may be secured
t,,,s-g checked and staterOoms reserved
80, he tlfy Ticket ONCE. li9 +. Baltimore
49, Arthur " Robson, Agent. I27 H. Balti-
20 : iroet, or the General Offces, Light and
u, streets Baltimore. Nd.
rHISH. N. CHAPMAN -.
Gsrl Pass Agt Asst. GEM. Pass. ARt.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

-..,gsspPAKE STEAMSHIP co. COM.
IgFSCIEG SUNDAY. May 1911, DAILY
4gHVICE.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

II, 10 CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY
TaIis., LAXATIVE BRoNo Quinins
III. Druggists refund money If II
a. ~ eors. Z. ". GROVES Ge.n.
IN sssh ksz REs.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

LAVE BALTlHo5RE!r H H9ga 3 ~ 8. ~ a
y AND iisS 7. N.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

For the best spot in town when ySu re
hungry for delightfully."- cooked food at
economy prices, for finest and quickest
service, try ANNAPOLIS RESTAU-
RANT, 224 Main Street, where you will
find the choicest Oysters, Fish, Lobster,
CLAIMS, Steak, Eggs, in fact anything
that can be had in season. Better cook
ing than you have probably had in a
blue moon outside of your home. Also
try one ofour Special 25c. Dinners with
Coffee.
Remember-Best Food at Popular
Prices. Open day and night.
Annapolis Restaurant.
>. n. FCUNOHS s. co.
224 Main Street, Annapolis, Md.
Phones. III and 624.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
CHESAPEAKE LINE.

.,,eA,r pAssENGER STEAMERS
! INV oF NORFOLK" AMI CITY OF
va BALTIMORE"
49,. orD POINT COMFORT and NOR
- s,sa,,e-s leave baltimore daily INCLUDING
q .risyl nj 600 p. m. leaving Old Point Com
-. 81 400 B. M arriving Norfolk at 100 a. IN.
-. by . Connection IS made with the Railroad
80 f,lr an points south.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

AND At 70 20 P. NJ.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

ws.s-1gt0n passengers Change
IA Academy Junction.
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20

.., rgyuRNCING AT 20 A. NJ,
81 ~ v-yrTEs AFTER EACH HOUR
Evening capital and Maryland gazette. (Annapolis, Md.) 1910-1922, 1911-09-20
....ssrlAoaaeny Jct. limited beyond

gEAIhs TDR BALTIMORE AND
eiht'- WASHINGTON.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
DEAF" BEeeAR COULD HEAR
Incident That Struck Householder AZ
Being Along Slightly Humor-
GUS Lines.

MANY funny things happen in a
nat during the course of few
months" said Milwaukee fiat dwell
er. but one of the best things l ever
saw happened yesterday.
II was suddenly reused from my
slumber by three loud knocks on the
door. Jumping to my feet and into a
bathrobe, hastened to see what was
wanted. opened the door in time
to see young fellow half way up the
flight to the next floor.
Hello. there!' l yelled at him.
He turned around. hastened back
and handed out a small envelope,
pointing to the inscription. l glanced
at 1t. 1t was an appeal for aid be-
cause the applicant was deaf and
dumb.
Say, | was mad enough to kick him
down stairs. Then the joke struck
me and slammed the door in his face
and went back to bed laughing"
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
FREED FROM SKIN DISEASE

Our boy was born in Toronto on
Oct. 13. 1908. and when three months
old a slight rash appeared on his
cheek. What appeared to be a wa
ter blister would form. When It
broke, matter would run out, starting
new blisters until his entire face.
head and shoulders were a mass of
scabs and you could not see a par.
ticle of clear skin. Other parts of
his body were affected, but not to
such an extent. We tried about every
advertised remedy without avail, in
deed some Of them only added to his
suffering and one in particular, the
- Remedy, almost put the infant
into commissions. The family doctor
prescribed for him and told us to
bathe the baby In buttermilk. This
did not do any good. 30 We took him
to hospital. He was treated as an
out-patient twice week and he got
worse. II anything. We then called
in another doctor and inside Of =
week the boy was, to all appearances,
cured and the doctor said his work
was done. But the very next day 1t
broke out as bad as ever.
I'VE decided that 1t could not be
cured and must run its course and SO
we Just kept his arms bandaged to
his side to prevent his tearing his
flesh. We left Toronto and shortly
after our arrival in Duluth. the Cuti-
cura Remedies were recommended.
We started using them in May, 1909,
and soon the cure was complete. You
4
child for Cuticura made his skin per-
fectly clear and he is entirely free
from the skin disease. There has
been no return this time. We still
use only Cuticura Soap for baby's
bath. Robert Mann. Proctor, MINI,
May 3. 1910"
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23

Fire in Mason City, Ia. destroyed
the high school building here. Loss
100000.
F. NJ. Vigil. for six years justice of
the peace at Aguilar. Colo, died of
cancer of the stomach. He was a
pioneer.
George Wycliffe Mcbride. former
United States senator from Oregon.
died in Portland, the result of stroke
of paralysis.
Fire in Atchison, Kans., destroyed
department store, the Ebenezer Zap
tist Church, one residence and greatly
damaged two shoe stores and an ice
plant. LOSS 100000.
The Kansas Supreme Court handed
down a decision in the states suit
against three subsidiary companies OF
the parent Standard Oil Companies,
prohibiting them from containing to
stifle competition.
A will leaving $500 for the sup
port and maintenance of a pet parrot
has been drawn and witnessed by
Thomas Billingsby. capitalist OF
Oklahoma City. The parrot is twenty
years old.
Heavy rains are reported through
out western South Dakota. eastern
Wyoming and southeastern Montana
every parched section receiving its
share. The fall was heaviest in the
Black Hills.
A veto against the proposed Morris
Flynn fight at Supulpa July 4th has
been announced by Governor Cruce
and the governor threatens to cali out
the militia if necessary to prevent the
bout, is being widely discussed in
Oklahoma City churches.
A letter has been sent to each OF
the congressman from Western states
and to Senator Guggenheim by the
Estes park committee of the Denver
Chamber OF Commerce, asBing their
support of the bill now in Congress tc
make Estes national park.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
SPORT.
WESTERN LEAGUE STANDING.

kid" Graves of Milwaukee has
been matched to box ten rounds with
Pal Moore of Philadelphia at Boston
June 26th.
An effort is being made TO match
Peter Jensen. the Battling Dane. and
Randolph Unholz for a l5-round bout.
at Trinidad. Colo, July 4th.
Eddie Johnson. of Alamosa, Colo,
and kid" Texas, OF Pueblo, will meet
at Alamosa. June 22nd. in l5-round
contest. Phil Kearney, of Denver, will
be matched with the winner
Frank Maggold of Kansas City and
st. Louis. an expert at all kinds of
billiards, who holds the Southern
championship, is In Denver in search
of a match.
Fighting Phil Schlosberg, champion
of the United States navy, and Eddie
McGorty of Oshkosh have signed arti-
cles for ten-round bout at East Chi
cago. Ind, June 2Sth. The articles
call for 163 pounds.
The 20-round bout between Jimmy
Mcdonald, of Denver, and Howard
Baker. of Boulder, which was to have
taken place at Sheridan. but was
stopped by the governor. will in all
probability take place at Lander, Wyo.,
July 3rd.
Two more worlds records were
smashed at the Tuiferies motordrome,
in Denver, when Eddie Hasha, the
Southern speed demon. lead field of
four other racers for ten miles in the
phenomenal time of minutes and 10
seconds, which is 8 20 faster than
the competition record made by Earl
Armstrong two weeks ago, on the
same track. Later he lowered the
two-mile mark.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
SOLVING NEGRO PROBLEM
Under Conditions, the Matter Seemed
Comparatively Easy Of
Arrangement.

The central police station was over
crowded one day last week. Oficers
were wondering what they would do
should another arrest be made, when
the door opened and sleepy-looking
blue-eyed foreigner drifted in with
most detected "Goot efning. mems"
The officers nodded their greetings
to the stranger. who then asked: Can
did some sleepings here? l yust
came from Chicago and am start to
work tomorrow"
We'll. the only space we have left
is bunk. which Is already occupied
by colored man. You can share
that II you want to-" replied the Off
Ger.
The man thought for a few minutes,
scratched his head and said:
We'll. guess l no can see him In
dark. and besides l am tired and want
sleep. Wisconsin.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
FOREIGN.

Johann Severin Svendsen, the Nor
wegian composer, is dead at Copen-
hagen. He was born in Christiania
in 1910.
The sinking of an overcrowded ferry
boat on the Volga, near Uglitch, Rus
sa, is reported. Thirty persons were
drowned.
Work of removing the water from
the cofferdam enclosing the wreck of
the battleship Maine is in progress
and the vessel will be raised soon.
Four thousand federal troops are
patrolling the streets of Chihuahua,
Mexico. determined the insurrecto
army under General Orozco shall not
enter the city.
Fifty aeroplanists took wing from
the aviation field at Vincennes on the
first stage of the Europe circuit race.
which calls for flight from Paris
to London and return with stops at
various places going and returning.
Almost Immediately after the start
two of the aviators met with tragic
deaths and at least one was gravely
hurt.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
wilIina to Support Proxy.

Albert Tiedemann, freshman OF
the University of Pennsylvania, was
called upon to vote for officers in
recent gathering Not being well ac-
Quainted with the nominees, he
thoughtfully kesitated before filling
out his ballot.
with the explanation that he ~onld
vote by proxy"
so will l." said Albert, and with his
pencil poised above his paper, leaned
over to companion on his right and
asked:
Say, what's Proxy's first name|'
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
m1he Bard of odon."

The Rev. George F. Culmer. "the
bard of Odon," celebrated his eighty
sixth birthday yesterday. The Rev.
Mr.. Culmer was born May %. 1925. in
Kent, England, during the reign Of
George Frederick George IV). for
whom he was named. At the time Of
his birth John Quincy Adams was
president of the United States.
Dr. Culmer has been a minister for
many years in the Methodist Episco-
pal church until his advanced age
made 1t necessary for him to retire
He is scholar and poet. Many OF
his poems have been published in
magazines and newspapers.-Washin
ton Correspondence indianapolis
News
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
HoMEsEEKERs ExcURs o N
RATES TO TEXAS AND NEW
MEXICO POINTS DUR
tSSIS'S
ING 1911.

On the first and third Tuesdays OF
each month during the entire year
The Colorado and Southern Rail
way will sell round trip homeseekers'
excursion tickets TO great many
points in New Mexico and Texas at
greatly reduced rates. Final limit
25 days allowing liberal stop-over
privileges. For detailed information,
rates, ETC.. call on your nearest Colo.
rado and Southern agent or address T.
f. Fisher, General Passenger Agent,
Denver, Colo.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
WASHINGTON.

The senatorial opponents OF Cana
dian reciprocity have given. up all
hope of defeating the bill.
The whipping post for wife beaters
has been instituted by the sheriff in
Rockville. Montgomery county. Mary
land, Just over the line from the Dis.
trict of Columbia.
A bill has been introduced in Con-
gress. being House bill No. 7O41. which
prohibits the carrying of alcoholic H.
quors into dry territory by common
carriers.
Representative Taylor introduced n
bill to grant rural free delivery mail
carriers thirty days annual leave of
tenance of vehicles.
Such estimates of the bids for the
governments per cent $50,000,000
Panama loan rs are available indicate
that the loan has been three timex
over subscribed and that the average
price of the new bonds will run little
over 102.50.
ment SS45,1S4 in disbursements to
special assistants to the attorney and
to district attorneys between March 5.
1903. and May 81. 1911. according to
a report transmitted to Chairman
Beall of the House committee on ex-
penditures in that department.
/. The Senate by Ga to "a passed the
resolution amending the constitution t.
provide for election of senators by di-
p,.;e nj
ment giving to the federal govern.
ment supervision of such elections was
adopted, "A to "A, the vice president
casting the deciding ballot. The House
had already passed the resolution
The military committee of the Sem
ate will interrogate Gen. Wood. chief
of staff of the army, concerning the
necessity for the proposed change in
army divisions and departments by
which the work of administration will
be concentrated in three cities of the
country, Chicago, New York and San
Francisco.
The Senate Military Affairs com
mittee will bring the officers of the
army general staff before it to learn
the necessity for the recent radical
changes made in army administration.
by which the administrative work of
the army Is to be concentrated in
New York, Chicago and San Fran
cisco.
The Canadian reciprocity bill now
has sixty votes in the Senate, accord
ing to the White House count The
Root amendment will be killed by
comfortable majority in the same
body. say the men who have studied
the situation for President Taft.
The Senate committee on foreign re-
lations decided to report favorably the
treaty between Honduras and this
country, providing for loan of $1O,.
100000 from banking interests of the
United States to meet the Honduran
debt. OF this amount $7,50O.0OO is to
be forthcoming at once.
The insular bureau of the War De-
partment has called for bids for $685.
900 four per cent bonds of the city
of Cebu, Philippine Islands, to defray
the expense of constructing sewer
and drainage facilities, provide water
Senator Jones of Washington intro
duced bill which may revive the
question Of leasing the government
public lands for grazing and other pur-
poses. 1t authorizes the secretary of
the interior to lease isolated tracts of
acres to the owners of adjoining lands. |
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
The k.l.er Like. the Bible.

The kaiser is great reader. and
while he tries to keep himself abreast
OF current events. his favorite book Is
the Bible. says the London Chronicle.
A well thumbed and marked copy Is
always by his bedside. When Mr..
Roosevelt visited Berlin last year. the
kaiser made him present of num-
ber OF books About half of them re-
ferred to theology and the others to
military subjects. These two classes
Indicate the kaiser's own preferences.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23
@ ZEN ERAl.

Both branches of the Wisconsin
Legislature have passed a bill grant
ing suffrage to women.
Damage estimated at 100000 to
$25O,OOO was caused by severe wind,
rain and electrical storm at Danville,
Va.
James Proctor Knott, former cover
nor of Kentucky and prominent for
many yeara in Congress, is dead at
Lebanon.
Prices of potatoes and other vege-
tables are soaring on account of dry
weather. Potatoes are 81 per bushel
III Kansas City.
Attorneys for the Standard Oil Com
pany are at work on plans for reor-
ganization to conform to the decision
Of the Supreme Court.
The steamer John L. Lowery, With
'ifty eXcursionists aboard, burned to
the waters edge at Hamietsburg, ILL.,,
opposite Smithsland. Ky. Loss of life
is heavy.
Mrs Helen NJ. Borden, wife OF Gail
Borden, who with his brother is wide
ly known as a condensed milk manu-
facturer, filed suit in Los Angeles.
for divorce.
August ClondeauX, ~. an expert
glass worker OF Ford City, Pa, de-
parted for Belgium, his native land.
accompanied by his wife and twenty
four children.
AT the behest OF the Southern Lum.
ber manufacturers Association. the
Long-Bell Lumber Company. which
controls thousands of acres OF timber
land, curtailed its yellow pine oltpdt
33i:. per cent during six months of
dent of the company.
A wind. rain. hail and electrical
storm struck the lower end of the Vir-
ginia peninsula and left a trail of
death and ruin. 1t was difficult even
to estimate the number of dead for
many small craft went down in the
storm at various points along the
James river and in Hampton roads.
estimates placed the
dead at not more than fifteen.
The southbound Shasta limited vas
held up and the mail car robbed by
two highwaymen between Drain and
Yoncalla. Oregon. The robbers en-
tered the mail car, held up the clerks
and looted the car. They stopped the
train at Yoncalla and escaped. 1t is
not known how much loot was Sc
cured.
Four convicts were killed, twelve
wounded and seventeen
guards and convicts more or less seri
ously hurt by the collapse of the bull
pen in which they were housed in a
pass at Waynesville, N. c.
A jury in the Supreme Court in New
York brought in verdict of $36,6s4
n favor of stephen NJ. Weld & Co.,
lotion brokers, and against the Postal
Telegraph Company for damages the
plaintiffs sustained in the transmits
sion of a telegram to New Orleans.
Heavy rains which swept the south
atlantic states for several days ended
drought which has extended from
eventeen days to more than month
II various sections. Crops generally |
lave been greatly benefited by the
hange in weather, especially cotton
.rop.
The Springfield herald., 1911-06-23

scarcely wear my shoes. The kidney
secretions bothered me and my nerves
were unstrung. began taking Doan's
Kidney Pills and soon the swelling
diminished. The backache and other
troubles quickly disappeared and 1
was completely cured"
Remember the name-Doan's.
For sale by druggists and general
storekeepers everywhere. Price soc.
Foster-Milburn Co.. Buffalo, N. Y.