The Washington herald., 1911-08-04
|CLINGING VINE TRAIT
IS AN ODIOUS ONE IN
AN ABLE MARRIED MAN
By DOROTHY DIX.

II In a lackadaisical, anateurish way,
as If he was afraid that he would get 1t.
After one of these atmless rambles,
seeking a situation, John would come
home by noon, eat whatever lunch had
been able to scrape together, and placidly
spend the rest of the day playing soil
tatre and reading the paper.
She Got Him o Job.
At length, In desperation, I went out
and got him a place myself. but he only
kept it little while. This was the be-
ginning Of many such experiences. No
job was attractive enough to hold him for
long. He would start of with great en-
thusiasn, but in a little while his energy
would wear itself out, and then It would
be the old story. Some night he would
come home with the announcement that
lie had given up his place because he was
prosecuted in the Office, or the super
intendent was unjust to him, or the work
was uncongenial-any old excuse except
that 1t was his own fault, and that he
lacked the grit to stick to a task after
the novelty had worn out and to keep on
working after It got to be work and not
play.
I'm the meantime We had, Of course.
been getting poorer and poorer. I had
niture that had been bridal presents to
me to buy John clothes so that he might
present decent appearance when he
went on his fruitless quests for work.
/ myself had no clothes except the cid
gowns and hats given me by my more
fortunate relatives, and I writhed under
their gifts, under the humiliation Of the
situation, for John was big and strong.
and healthy and Intelligent. and there
seemed no possible excuse for his sinking
into the class OF ne'er-do-wells.
The Croyvning Humiliation.
AT last the crowning humiliation of q
woman's life was mine. I had to go
back to my people, to be taken care Of by
them. to be a burden on them, to be
pitied and spoken Of as poor Fanny
whose husband couldn't support her.
Worse still. John went with me. He
had to be supported. too. because he
couldn't make a living.
II stood this hideous nightmare OF de-
pendence for two years, waiting, hoping.
praying for my husband to get out and
do something and show that he was O
man. I tried to encourage him to work.
to jolly him into It, to hold him In a job
when he got one, but i was no use. He
would always give It up and come back.
square n1els a day.
II had always had a talent for sewing.
a turn for making dresses. and so finally,
because I felt that I would rather die
than be dependent any longer, took my
courage in both hands and started out to
make living for myself.
II went to q distant city, and John
went with me. I literally worked day
and night, and eventually I built up a
h,V1t &h4N haa 10 fal, n
have ceased to be a dressmaker and am
now an artist, and people pay for my
touch on a gown and point to me as an
example of what a woman can achieve.
And IN all these years I have sup
ported John, who Is Just man enough
to be Inundated at the position in which
he Is situated, but who was not man
enough to bring about a different situa-
ton Therefore, he takes out his hurt
pride in hating me, while he eats the
cakes and ale that I provide.
IF I had to go back and live my
married life over again, on the day when
1 realized that he was lazy I should
turn him out Of the house and say to
him as the Spartan women Of old did
to their sons. Come back with your
shield, or on It.
Contempt for Loafer.
'T should say: IF you were sick or
afflicted, would work my fingers to the
bones to take care Of you, and thank
God for the privilege OF doing It: but
you are we'll and strong, and I shouldi
not love you: should have a contempt,
for you, IL you sat down and let Al
woman support you.
"'Go, the world Is wide; Il Is fun OF,
for any strong man who Is
willing to work. Drive garbage cart.
break rock on the street, dig bitches, IL
that is the best that you can do, and II
shall honor and respect you, but as long
as you sit here dressed In clothes that
somebody else pays for. eating the bread
another works for, I despise you as a.
loafer, a quitter, a thing that shames,
the shape of a man.
"'Go, and never como back to me until
you have made good, and can come back
a man. capable Of standing on your own
feet and providing by your own head andi
hands for your own family
IF I had said that to my husoandI
and forced him out into the world to de-,
pend on himself should have given HIM
at least his chance Of manhood, ana
things would have been better for Us
both"
you're right said one Of the men,,
the man who is a clinging vine Is not
only an unlovely object. He Is poison-'