davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
SOCRATES ON PHILOSOPHY.

He Shows That Wittieism May Do
Real Good.
Socrates-Glaucon, what would you
say philosophy is?
Glaucon-I should say that, broadly
speaking, it Is putting two and two
together.
Socrates-That is, to some purpose?
Glaucon-Of course.
Socrates-Therefore to say that no.
body is very enthusiastic about our
great victory over the Cunningham
coal claims because it is not the time
of year when anybody cares whether
we defend our coal pile or not would
not be philosophy?
Glaucon-No; that would be a sort
Of witticism.
Socrates-Which is unworthy Of
philosopher?
GlaucOn-YeS.
Socrates-That is, it could serve no
other purpose than probably to make
somebody laugh?
GlaucOn-Exactly.
Socrates-It would not be doing any
good?
Glaucon-No.
Socrates-That is to say, it would
not do the person who laughed any
good?
Glaucon-Well, yes. Laughing,
dare say, does any one good.
Socrates-Therefore we have to con-
slider whether by doing good we mean
the individual or society generally?
GlaucCn-YeS.
Socrates Which do we mean?
Glaucon-You are splitting hairs a
little too fine for me, Socrates.
Socrates Nonsense. If one did an
individual good without doing society
harm would that be doing good?
Glaucon--Yes.
Socrates Therefore to make some
one laugh might very easily be doing
good?
Glaucon-Certainly.
SOcrates-And to say that this is not
the season when any enc cares wheth-
er we defend our coal pile or not prob
ably would make some one laugh?
GlaucOl-It might.
! Socrates-And thus do him consider
able good?
GlaucOn-YOu never can tell.
Socrates-Which would give it pur-
pose?
| GlaucOn-True.
Socrates-And make it philosophy?
Glaucon-By Jove, Socrates, you have
me nicely!
Socrates-Very well. Now let US all
go down and see who can hold his
head under water the longest.-Clarz
McAdams in st. Louis PoSt-Dispatch.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Tortured for Fifteen Years.

by cure-defying trouble that baf-
fled doctor, and resisted all remedies
he tried, John w. Modders, of Mod
dersville, Mich, seemed doomed. He
had to sell his farm and give up work
His neighbors said, ''he can't live
much longer" Whatever [ ate dis
tressed me-" he wrote, "till | tried
Electric Bitters. which worked such
wonders for me that l can now eat
things l could not take for years. It's
surely grand remedy for stomach
trouble" Just as good for the liver
and kidneys. Every bottle guaranteed.
ONLY SOC at OberdOrfer'
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Justi6ca alton,

81 may have lost my golf ball"
thought the old man as he crept on
all tours round the bush into which it
had rolled, 'but 1 will not lose my
temper"
So he continued to grOvel and grope
and to wear a persuasive, patient
smile. His knees bagged, his back
ached horribly, and the bush bestowed
upon his hands generous quantity
of thorns. But he refused to discard
his smile and kept on repeating:
mo; / will not lose my temper-l
will not!'
Suddenly the elusive ball caught his
eye. Hopping fat, he stretched out
his hand toward it, grasped it among
its nest Of thorns and gingerly with
drew it.
"Hoity toityw exclaimed an old
lady's voice behind him. You ought
to be ashamed, birdnesting at your
time of life!" And then he did lose his
temper.-Answers.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
WASH THAT ITCH AWsY

It Is said that there are certain
springs in Europe that give relief and
cure to Eczema and other skin dis.
eases. If you knew that by washing
In these waters you could be relieved
from that awful itch, wouldn't you
make every effort to take trip tC
Europe at once? Would yon not be
willing to spend your last cent to find
the cure?
But you need not leave home for
these distant springs. Relief is right
here in your own home town!
A simple wash of Oil Of Winter
green, Thymol and other ingredients
as compounded only in D. D. D. Pre-
scription Will bring instant relief to
that terrible burning itch, and leave
the skin as smooth and healthy as
that of child.
If you have not already tried 1t, get
at least 25-cent bottle today. We es-
sure you OF instant relief.
G. S. Warden & Son.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Mere Matter of SPEED.

The Reading railways lawyer was
cross examining a negro woman who
had sworn that she saw train hit a
milk wagon, whose bandaged driver
had just testified. No, she had not
heard the engine blow any whistle
whatsoever.
How near were you to the train"
the lawyer asked her sharply.
She didn't know exactly. 1t might
have been 80 far and it might have
been a little farther.
"But how farT' the lawyer persist
ed. GA mile, or a square, or what?
How long would it have taken you to
walk the distance"
"Suh," the witness replied haughtily,
"dat would depend entirely on my
speed "-Clermont Courier.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
FREE SAMPLE OF LAXATIVE
CURED HIS Constipation

When a person has become dis
couraged through years of failure to
find cure, and finally, perhaps, gives
up trying, it is small wonder that he
becomes skeptical. And yet, to all
who have constipation, we would say,
TRY just one thing more"
We wish you would try DR.. Cald-
wells Syrup Pepsin, laxative tonic
that has been used for a generation
Thousands are using it; surely some
of your friends among the number.
You can buy it of any druggist at
fifty cents and one dollar a bottle, but
better still, send your name and ad-
dress to DR.. Caldwell for a free sam
pie bottle. He will send you enough
to convince you of its merits, and
then if you like it you can buy it of
your druggist. Mr.. J. J. Petty of I'm
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11

ionville, Mo-, Mr.. George w. thinner
man of Harrisburg, Pa, and many
others of both sexes and in all parts of
the country first used a sample bottle
and now have it regularly in the
house.
You will learn to do away with
salts, waters and c1hartics for these
are but temporary reliefs while Dr.
Caldwell's Syrup Pepsin is guaranteed
to cure permanently. 1t will train
your stomach and bowel muscles SO
that they will do their work again
aside your skepticism and try Syrup
Pepsin.
For the free sample address DR.. w.
B. Caldwell. 402 Caldwell building
Monticello, Ill.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Vile Got Tip Top Advice.

my wife wanted me to take our
boy to the doctor to cure an ugly
BOIL" writes d. frankie. of Stroud,
Okla. 81 said put Bucklen's Arnica
Salve on it, She did so, and it cured
the boil in short time Quickest
healer of burns, scalds cuts, corns,
bruises, sprains, swellings. Best pile
cure on earth. Try it. Only Csc at
Oberdorfer's.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
81. GOD
POI SON
Cured BY the Marve! Of the
Century, 3. B. B.-Tested for
30 years.

Drives out blood poison in any
stage permanently, without deadly
mercury, with pure Botanical !nSred-
ents. To prove it we will send you a
SAMPLE TREATMENT X q +.
If you have ulcers, eating sores,
itching humors, swelilngs, nacus
matches. bone pains, offensive pimples
or eruptions, take B. b. B. (Botanic
Blood Balm. Ali symptoms heal
quickly. Blood is mase pure and rich
completely changing the entire body
into clean, healthy condition, heal
ing every sore and stopping all aches,
pains and itching, curing the worst
case of blood poison. Druggists or by
express. 81 per large bottle, with al
rections for hone cure. Samples
sent free by writing Blcoi Balm Co.,
Atlanta, Ga. Describe your trouble
and free medical advice gwen.
Sold by Warden & Son.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Raise Fine Mules in China.

North China is noted for raising tine
best mules in the middle kingdom. In
Pekin one will see mules quite as good
in every respect as the Missouri and
Kentucky product. The finest are en-
ployed by Chinese officers and other
wealthy men to draw their "Pekn
carts"
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Hiuh Price for MANUSCRIPT.

Twenty dollars line was the-prica
given recently for the original manu-
script of Burns ode to the Duchess
of Kingston. The poem consisting OF
a dozen lines, was sold for 1914.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
To Remove Rust Stains.

Boil the article with the rust stain
for about an hour in three gallons OF
water. To each gallon add one table
spoonful of cream tartar. The stain
will disappear, no matter how old.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
The Interesting Phase.

When a famous tenor quits singing
for awhile the public is tempted to for
get the loss to art in figuring on the
deficit in the singers personal bank
account
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Administrators Notice.

All persons having claims against
the estate of Mrs. Bridget Cain, de-
ceased, will have same properly prov
zen according to law and filed with the
undersigned administrator. Those
knowing themselves indebted to said
estate will please call and settle.
VIM. GRAMMAR.
Administrator with the will annexed
of Mrs. Bridget Cain, deceased.
27jlm
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Busiest CT All,

In busy New York there is nothing
buster than the telegraph instruments.
which tick off an average of $4,000
messages each day.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Sad Truth,

London man says he cuts his own
hair TO fool the barber. May fool the
barber, but he can't fool anybody else.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
NWeEKnOw.
.-BEOODINE..
VIII Help You
To Regain Your Strength
and Energy
Repefs Of the Head Physician @
q Leading New York Hospital
q on the Cure Of CstArrh.

ga few years ago we considered that
we were doing well if we cured ten per
cent. of the cases of catarrh brought
to us, but since the introduction OF
"Bloodine" into our hospital we cure
more than 90 per cent. Of all the cases
of Catarrh in its various forms brought
to us. Catarrh of the Head, Catarrh
Of the Eyes, Catarrh OF the Bladder
land Uretha, Catarrh Of the large In
testineS, Catarrh of the Larynx, Pelvic
Catarrh, Catarrh Of the Throat, and
'Catarrh of the Stomach are quickly
cured with "Bloodine." Itbuildsnew
tissues, gives new energy, new life,
new blood and strength to any part OF
the body attacked BY the Catarrhal
germs"
Bloodine is q powerful tonic, nour.
fishing food medicine, composed OF
valuable tonic stimulants obtained
from vegetable drugs. "Bloodine"
contains no narcotics or other danger
GUS drugs which merely deaden pain
temporarily, but give no permanent
relief or cure the cause Of your disease.
:"Bloodine is a powerful body builder
and blood maker; it is the best remedy
known to the medical profession TO
enrich thin, watery blood and supply
new, rich red blood to the whole body.
j FREE To prove the wonderful
merits of BLOODINE we will mail Q
large sample bottle for 10 cents ID SUI
YER or stamps for postage.
IODINE CORPORATION. Boston. Mas
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
Still in Primitive Life.

The natives of New Guinea have
been found living as if in the stons
ago
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
OuarreIed About Love.

He-So the engagement is of and
Maud and Jack don't speak to each
other. What caused the quarrel?
She-'Twas the silliest thing. They
were talking about theirs being case
of love at first sight and then got into
q fierce dispute as to which had seen
the other first-Boston Transcript.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1911-08-11
A Changed Coast.

A Changed Coast.
When pilgrim fathers found place
Upon a stern and rock bound coast
They founded an important race,
A much admired and honored host
But could they come again today
Upon that rock bound coast to dwell
They'd have to move; they couldn pa y
Tho price OF board at hotel.
Washington Star.
Newark post., 1911-08-30
Pleasant Quarters
AT. County Fair

The Free Library of Whining
ton has irfaugurated novel
scheme for making itself serve the
public need, in the establishment
OF a reading tent on the Far
grounds. A separate tent about
4ox25 feet, allows plenty OF room
for the exhibit which has been ar
ranged and for the visitors.
The principal object of the Ii
brary in having this exhibit is to
provide a reading room for those
who become tired, and to make
plain some of the resources OF
the library.
A small collection OF the best
books in the library will be shelv-
ed in the tent and there will be on
file several popular and technical
magazines as we'll as the daily pap :
ers of Wilmington, Philadelphia
and New York. Attendants from
the library will be on duty all day
to explain the various phases OF OF
the library's activities. They will
make it plain that the resources OF
the library are absolutely Tree to
Newark post., 1911-08-30

everyone and those who wish to
become borrowers can register at
the tent instead OF at the library.
Many, in the past, have thought
that those who become borrow
ers must either have property or
refer to others who will guarantee
the library against loss. The at
tendants will show that this is not
true. Anyone can become a bor-
rover simply by asking for the
privilege.
Various printed lists of books
on special subjects, such as ma
chlnery, aeroplanes, motor boats,
painting, paper hanging, roads,
poultry and farming will be dis
tributed free to those who are in
terested. 1t will be the effort OF
the library to make the tent home
Newark post., 1911-08-30
New Game Laws

here appears to be some Con-
fusion on the part Of number #
persons as a result Of the changes
made in the Delaware game laws
by the last session Of the General
Assembly. In view Of the fact that
the squirrel season now opens on
September IS instead Of Novam-
Der IS, as heretofore, some per.
sons are of the opinion that I'll.
season ior rail and reed birc
shooting opens on the same date
Such an idea is erroneous, fol
the season for rail and reed birc
shooting opens as usual on Sep
teml er I.
Newark post., 1911-08-30
PROMOTED FROM FIFTH
TO SIXTH GRADE.

TO SIXTH GRADE.
Alfred Grove, David Singles, |
David Chalmers, Joseph Moore,
William Crossan, Ira Steele, FL
wood Dean, Norris Smith, Oscar
Ewing, David Clancy, Herman
Wollaston, Harry Sanborn, Clyde
Poole, Ralph Robinson, Orlando
Smith, Jacob Billet, George
Chambers, Carl Riley, Paul
Rhodes, Karl Jones, Elmer Emer-
son, Helen Currinder, Lille Get
ty, Blanche Edmanson, Ethel
Sheppard, Gertrude Hill, Adelaide
Lewis, Gertrude Willis, Helen
Leak, Mary Clancy, Edna Gun
ningham, Sadie Gray, Alphonsa
Anderson, Margaret Doyle, Ger
trude Day.
PROMOTED FROM SIXTH
TO SEVENTH GRADE.
Eugene Kennedy, Francis Lin
DELL Walter Holton,, Gilbert
Chambers, Leroy Campbell, Con-
rad Lewis, Ralph Gregg, Allyn
Cooch, Newell Reed, William
Merrick, Joseph Rhodes, Ernest
Cornog, Ramoth Anderson, John
Fossett, John Richards, Raymond
Fader, Anna Sanborn, Florence
Colbert, Dorothy Lloyd, Irene
Richards, Katharine Wilson, Flor
ence Moore, Ida Getty, Alice Sin
giles, Hannah Fulton, Francis
Clark, Geneva Bnrnite, Margaret
Porter, Helen O'Rourke. Rita
Singles, Verda Gesaman, Maud
kilmon, Myrtle Campbell, lrma
Cornog.
PROMOTED FROM SEVEN
TIL TO EIGHTH GRADE.
Kathryn Clark, Edythe Whit
tingham, Helen Sheppard, Alyce
Shepheard, Marion Law, Mar
guerite Grove, Marion Brown,
Myrtle Wakeland, Helen Slack,
Helen Wollaston, Ethel Jackson,
Sarah Potts, Mary Stewart, Nora
Riley, Anna Richards, Harriet
Boys, Marion Smith, Blanche
Towson, Rachel Moore,
CONDITIONED.
Ruby Robinson, Emily Currin-
der, Katie Montgomery, Nora
! Riley, Elsie Crow, Flora Richards.
| George Wilson, Frank Tweed.
| ON TRIAL.
Carrie George, Frank Mackey
FROM EIGHTH TO NINTH
GRADE
Elsie Grier, Edna Chambers
Ella b ct h Stroud, Cecilia
O'Rourke, Helen McNeal, Mar.
garet Steele, Eleanor Fader, Leils
Herbener, Grace Merrick, Naom
Street, Laura Steele, Elsie Tweed
; Irma Jaquette, EdNh Lewis, Bon
) Brown, Paul Lovett, Herman Lit
, tie, Henry Mote, Frank Mote
Harry Green, Knowles Bowen
Ralph Dawson and Rodney Mil
, Ter.
FROM NINTH TO TENTH
GRADES.
Margaret Cook, Edna Cham
bers, Dora Law, Alice Moore, An
!, ma Gallaher, Edith Spencer, Elsi
/, Slack, Hettie Slack, Julia McMul
], len, Olive, Heiser and Edna Chal
: mers; Arthur Homewood, Georg
: Allcorn, Julian Clark, Simpso
Hoffecker.
} FROM TENTH TO ELEVEN
TIL GRADES.
: Mildred McNeal, Eleanor Pill
d ing, Carrie Jameson, Helen Steele
: Ona Singles, Mildred Ferguson
! Ethel Pierce, Emily Worral
: France Anderson, Hubbard Alder
). son, Oliver Suddard, Presly Gee
: hegan, Wilbert Ramsey.
|. #On Trial.
: Pleasant Quarters
a Al. County Fai
r, The Free Library of Whining
t, ton has inaugurated a nov
a scheme for making itself serve tt
7 nt,hlic need. in the establlsllmel
Newark post., 1911-08-30

like and attractive, and it is hoped
hat many will visit it.
Newark post., 1911-08-30
FROM TENTH TO ELEVEN
TIL GRADES.

Mildred McNeal, Eleanor Pill
ing, Carrie Jameson, Helen Steele,
Ona Singles, Mildred Ferguson
Ethel Pierce, Emily Worral|
France Anderson, Hubbard Alder
son, Oliver Suddard, Presly Geo
hegan, Wilbert Ramsey.
#On Trial.
Newark post., 1911-08-30
ROMOTED FROM FOURl II
TO FIFTH GRADE.

Edward Cage, Harvey Johnson,
tlee kilmon, Ervine Lauer, Will
Pm Miller, John Williams, ALVIN
alor, Johnson Rowan, William
ann, William Mars, Harvey
pok, Tom Armstrong, #Ermont
Fray, Raymond Barney, Edward
ichards, Earl Ramsey, Earl Rob
son, John Kelley, Harlan Tweed
llllam Bland, Roy Segars, Mar
"a Wollaston, #Myrtle Miller,
dlth Edmanson, Elizabeth Nc
eab Lillian Jackson, Marian
oVett, Sarah Brown, Manuehta
Fmstrong, Gladys McAllister,
nela nell, Pilnick, Marion Gallaher,
lille Williams, *Mabel Wassa-
-
Newark post., 1911-08-30
FROM NINTH TO TENTH
GRADES.

Margaret Cook, Edna Cham
bers, Dora Law, Alice Moore, An
ma Gallaher, Edith Spencer, Elsie
Slack, Hettie Slack, Julia McMul-
len, Olive, Heiser and Edna Chal-
mers; Arthur Homewood, George
Allcorn, Julian Clark, Simpson
Hoffecker.
p~,, ,rr,r1-rr no TIT T1vT>NT
Payette enterprise. (Payette, Canyon Co., Idaho) 1909-1935, 1911-08-17
COMPANY | MAKES
EXCELLENT SCORE
At Practice Shooting In Preparation
for Encampment Company
Makes Good Score at Two and
Three Hundred Yard Range.

Company ! held practice shoot
last Sunday afternoon at which
time they shot two hundred ydr-s
OH hand AMI three LunGred yar-s
Kneellng, az slow iirs. Tne practice
snoot was held TO get the boy s
III shape Tor the encampment and
rifle practice at Bose the 21st to
s0th inclusive. The results OF tne
score are very satisfactory TO
Capt. Fitch. The two and three
hundred yard range IS the most diff
cult that VIII be shot at the encamp-
ment in Bose. The officers OF
The Company are more than pleased
with the score and ii they can g-t
. marksman out OF ali the men in
the Company they feel that they
niay win the Governors trophy. 10
get mar6sman's pan each man
must average SO and the officers be
nee that looking at the records
nf other companies that ha, e been
in encampment and had their shoot,
naS an acreage OF 80 would win
he trophy.
Ten o. he privates are men that
dave never shot at range practice be-
sore. The balance of the company
net mentioned are al old marksmen
and the feeling in the company is
nat they will have walk away in
the shoot for the Go e-nor trophy.
Following is the score made, 1ol
shots at each range. record out OF a
possible fifty: U
Payette enterprise. (Payette, Canyon Co., Idaho) 1909-1935, 1911-08-17
LARGE CROWD
IS ENTERTAINED
Three Thousand Residents Of Pay
etc Valley v.sig and Inspe>t
Cold Storage Plant on Saturday
Last the CpSnins LAY.

That the people of this valley are
interested in the new cold storage
plant was e. idencel on las Saturday.
fhe company had ad CrtlseI that on
nat Gay it would hold open house
or the purpose OF al owing those
Interested to Inspect the pant. Three
housand people took aIyaatage Of
the invitation and visited the plant.
-All day long they thronged the build
ing being entertained b. the force at
york there and every detail Of the
construction and the manner OF
handling the products put there was
explained to them. One Of the fes-
lures OF the inspection was the thor
ugh explanation o. how the ice was
manufactured. The ice plant was
running full blast ard at noon a pull
If ice was made showing those there
Just how it was done. Luncheon con-
sisting of fee cream. cake. sand
wiches I'D - 'rade WIS SIRED TO
all who desired and everyone was
pleased with the entertaining man
ner in which the company had pre-
pared for them. A large number OF
business men attended in body
NJ noon and after a thorough In
sDection OF the pl'nt those familiar
with other like buildings gave II as
heir opinion that TIE building was
the superior OF any other OF a IKE
nature in the state AMI Derhans IN
he entire northwest. Other storage
Giants may be larger but none OF
Payette enterprise. (Payette, Canyon Co., Idaho) 1909-1935, 1911-08-17
BAPTIST CHURCH.
FOR SALE OR TRADE.

Desert REIMBURSEMENT to so acres.
Third annual proof has been made.
Fenced, ditch made. fifteen acres
cleared and plowed ready for crop.
address, Box 62S, Paye:te. Itaho.
Miss Edna Ellen Co,e. one Of the
.nterprising teachers Of Omaha, was
Ia Payette last week looking over
her orchard purchased from the
Payette Valley Land and Orchard Co.
Miss Cole was highly pleased with
the Valley, its orchards and her in
vestment.
irwin Thurston and MISC Ethel
Venable returned Monday e. en- 'ng
from New Meadows where they have
been enjoying their outing at the
camp of E. c. Pence and family near
that resort. They report that all
campers are having a fine time and
that there are many camped near
that town.
Payette enterprise. (Payette, Canyon Co., Idaho) 1909-1935, 1911-08-17
WILL SOON BE HERE.

Richards & Pringle's Famous Geor-
sia Minstrels have probably made
nore people laugh than all the 9TH
minstrels combined. All those
ompanies that sprang into exist
nee soon after the birth of the
'eorgias have long since been for
;otten.
The public were quick to dis
inguish between the real and the
imitation and the management OF
his company in turn appreciated this
confidence. and have ever striven
10 give that which was best. high
lass and most desired.
That the policy of giving the pub
tic its moneys worth and more 10
he best policy, thirty years Of pros
1erity amply proves.
The date of this company's ap-
pearance at Elite Opera House 10
august 26, 1911.
Oh, listen to the band! They will
lara1e the principal streets at noon.
"A little nonsense now and then
is relished by the best Of men,"