davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

seems to penetrate his mind to the re-
gion of his memory and he forgets to
move. Parsifal is fine horse, with
most lovable disposition. but when the
air becomes charged with gasoline he
forgets his duty and falls asleep at
the switch"
Parsifal may be a new idea in
horses, but the next time go buggy
riding 1t will be in street car.
When we reached home that after.
noon found note from Bunch
which cheered me up wonderfully.
The note read as follows:
City, Sunday Morning.
Dear John.-Sorry we had the run-in,
but it was all my fault. Am sending
you two rosebuds this evening as a
peace offering. Yours.
BUNCH.
1.-TWO rosebuds!" snickered.
That boy Bunch is a honey-cooler all
right. But I'm sorry he didn't make
1t two cigars"
"Oh, john" Peaches said to me
little while later, when we went over
to Uncle Peters villa to take dinner
with them and spend the evening. Il
do wish l could tell you about the sur
prise, but Uncle Peter made me prom
ise not to say single word"
We'll, if you feel tempted to give
the old gentleman the double cross and
tell me, why I'll lock myself up in the
doghouss till he gives you the start
ing pistol" I chimed in. Who Is
that dragging the works out of the
clock in the sitting-room?"
1T isn't any such thing!" Peaches
exclaimed Indignantly. ITS Uncle
Peter, and he has a dreadful cold, but
Aunt Martha has 1t nearly cured now,
she says
He caught the cold about three days
previously, but after taking the pre-
scription of every loving friend within
a radius Of four miles, the cold had al
most disappeared. In place OF the
cold. however, Uncle Peter now had
acute indigestion, nervous procrastina-
ton, delirium tremens and q SPAWN on
his of fetlock.
All this was caused by 4 rush of
homemade medicine to his brain.
Aunt Martha is a great believer in
the simple life, so when Uncle Peter
acquired a simple cold she got sim
pie move on and poured enough simple
medicines into him to float a simple
| tug.
Every friend she had in the world
| suggested different remedy, and she
tried them all on Uncle Peter.
The cold got frightened and left on
the second day, but q woman has to
be loyal to her friends, so Aunt Mar.
tina kept on spraying Uncle Peters
system with dandelion tea and fried
| peppermint until every microbe heard
about him and dropped in to pay him
a long visit.
The frat thing Aunt Martha wanted
to do was to rub Uncle Peters chest
with goose grease.
Goose grease is such a noisy com
| panion," Uncle Peter demonstrated
Goose grease may be loud, but II
is never vulgar" said Aunt Martha
and she went after it.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

carries the patents away when ad-
vancing years makes it necessary for
them to lay the burdens down. We
are building up peasantry lit sounds
hard to call it that which promises
trouble in the future and raises the
question whether we are not establish
ing here in the central west the con-
ditions that have been the curse Of
Ireland for three hundred years. The
result of this condition is that the soil
is losing it's fertility; the farm is be-
coming foul; noxious weeds are grow
ing; the landlord squeezes the tenant
for all the rent that is in sight and
the tenant takes it out of the farm; he
cannot afford for the short lease OF
one or two years to buy fertilizers;
he must simply rob the soil for all
he can get and turn it over to his sue.
cessor In worse condition than he
found It, He cannot go into stock
farming on short land tenures, so he
must be what is known as grain
farmer, and this takes the life out of
the soil. The greatest economic men.
ace of the world today, bar nothing,
is the depletion Of soil fertility, and
this will go on as tenantry increases
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
BAD. ROADS :...|B|||U|.R||:|DE|N
ONWARD MARCH OF PROGRESS -
RETARDED ~ MISERABLE
HIGHWAYS.
BIG HANDICAP TO PEOPLE
Costs Much More to Haul Produce
Over Bad Roads Than It Does Over
Good Roads-Effect Of Good Roads
On Social Life.
eY HOWARD II. GROSS.

0O"RnO 100oos
When one makes a study of this
great subject and sees in how many
ways the march Of progress is re-
farded by miserable highways the
country over, and realizes what a
burden this handicap places upon the
people, it is surprising that the whole
population does not rise as one man
and demand that the highway condi-
lions shall be improved to the standard
required for the twentieth century.
Road advocates have shown for
years and years how MICH more it
costs to haul produce over bad roads
than 1t does over good ones; how with
good roads the farmer can market his
produce at any time he desires to do
so and take advantage of market con-
d1ttons and get the most for what he
has to sell.
Bad roads are a serious handicap
to social conditions. and sometimes for
weeks at time dwellers in the farm
home are marooned by stretches Of
impossible roads. They cannot get
out to see anybody and nobody can
get to see them. The town that is
five miles away might as we'll be twice
that. We know that man is sociable
thing-it is part of his nature-he can
only grow and develop by meeting his
fellow men-touching elbows-and by
| social and business intercourse.
We know that bad roads have been
responsible in very large degree for
driving the young people from the
farms to the cities. The census for
the last thirty years has shown an
ever increasing drift of the best brains
and blood of the farm to the city, This
is true Notwithstanding that there is
| no better business in the world than
farming, ii it is done along up-to-date,
progressive lines. It renders a surer
and larger return than anything else
In the worlds work, yet the fact re-
mains that the boy is not satisfied
with farm life. With good roads, so
he could get out whenever he desired
to with his best buggy and girl, or
perhaps an automobile, country life
would take on an entirely different
aspect.
The handicap Of the bad road is Ger
tainly heavy one and is farreaching.
Education has suffered greatly by reac
son Of it. The country schools are
little, IL any, better than they were
forty years ago. 1t Is an open question
whether they are as good. The wages
| noi6 tho toachoro aro sman Tho
number OF pupils is very limited
sometimes three or four-often not
over a dozen or fifteen. There is no
school spirit; there is no anything
but dreariness and drudgery with little
progress toward education. When the
boy and girl get old enough to realize
this condition and the parents see it,
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Accent Is Beyond Him.

The only real blot on my visit to
Glasgow is my total inability to speak
with a Scottish accent. rather pride
myself, as most people do, on my vo-
cal initiative faculties; but l confess
to all the world here and now that
l cannot initiate the Scottish accent.
My Irish Is beautiful; it would make
all Dublin weep. My American is
quite good; could nearly always get
anything that wanted in the shops
if l had the money. Anybody can
talk Welsh who cares to substitute
''p" for "b" and "f'' for w." But the
Scottish accent eludes me.
Sometimes speak little Scottish.
tentatively, to the policemen or the
tram conductors or the shopkeepers.
The policemen draw their slaves, the
tram conductors stop their trans, and
the shopkeepers put up their shut
tiers. am not quite sure, but rather
think that I shall abandon the I'm.
equal struggle.-London Sketch.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

q ~
scratched his left ankle with his right
heel.
Then the big machine made a sud
den jump to the right and hiked by US
at the rate Of about 500 fine, while
the lady passengers on the hurricane
deck stood up and began to hand out
medals to each other because they
didn't run us down.
Ten minutes later Parsifal came to
and looked over his shoulder at US
with smile a. serene as the morn
ing and once more resumed his mad
career onward, ever onward.
We were now about two miles from
home, and suddenly we came across
q big red Bubble which stood in front
of a road-house, sneezing inwardly
and sobbing with all it's corrugated
heart.
Parsifal saw the machine before we
did.
We knew there must be an ANTONIO
bile somewhere near, because he
stopped still and quietly passed away
jumped out and tried to lead him
by the Coroner's Delight. but he
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Shocklna!

Miss D., a teacher Of unquestioned
propriety in all its branches, was in
the throes of commencement, and to
the best of her ability was entertain
ing some young men-the suitors Of
her fair pupils. They conversed on
some beautiful flowers in the drawing
room. eyes," exclaimed the old lady;
'but If you think these are pretty,
you just ought to go upstairs and look
in the bath-tubs Of the girls dormi-
tories. They are just full of American
beauties!"
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Electric Mules for Panama

this curious towpath, powerful electric
locomotives will draw the largest
ships smoothly and swiftly across the
continent. A steamer Of, say 10000
tons, which the canal will readily
accommodate, is obviously a very
heavy burden, and the electric loco
motives will be geared to the tracks
by a middle rail in the form OF q
rack. The canal commission has ad-
vertised for 2,0O0, 900 pounds Of steel
ties, slots and covers and 100000
pounds of steel channels. This rack
railway will be built by the commits 70
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

One Sunday, determined to forget
all my troubles and take Peaches out
buggy riding.
When I suggested the buggy ride
to Peaches she was delighted, and
:moseyed for the Ruraldene livery sta
BILE to get staked to horse.
The livery man at Ruraldene is
named Henlopen Diffenbingle, and he
looks the part.
judged from the excited manner
in which he grabbed my deposit money
that morning that he had note fall
ing due next day.
Then Henlopen shut his eyes,
counted six, turned around twice, null
tiplied the day of the week by 10, sub
tracted II, and the answer was a
cream-colored horse with four pink
teet and s. frightened face, which
looked at me sadly, sighed deeply and
then backed up into the shafts of a
buggy with red wheels and white sui
phur springs.
The livery man said that the name
of the horse was Parsifal, because 1t
seemed to go better in German.
drove Parsifal up to our modest
home, and all the way there we ran
neck and neck with coal cart.
When I reached the gate whistled
for Peaches, because l was afraid to
get out and leave Parsifal alone. He
might go to sleep and fall down.
My wife came out, looked at the
rig, and then went back in the house
and babe everybody an affecting fare.
well.
We started off and we were rush.
ing along the road. passing fence
and overtaking telegraph pole every
once in a while, when suddenly we
heard behind us very insistent choof
choof- choof- choof!
Its one of those Careless Wag'
ons,' l whispered to Peaches, and
then we both looked at Parsifal to see
II there was Il mental struggle going
on in his forehead. but he was rushing
onward with his head down, watching
his feet to make sure they didn't step
on each other.
ChOOf-choOf-chOOf! came the Tor.
pedo Destroyer behind US, and
wrapped the reins around my wrist
in case Parsifal should get uneasy and
want to print hOrseshoes all over that
automobile.
The next minute the machine
passed US, going at the rate of IA con
stables an hour. and as it did so Par
sifal stopped still and seemed to be
biting his lips with suppressed emo
tiOn.
I cOaxed him to proceed in English
in Spanish and Italian, and then in &
pale blue language of my own, but he
just stood there and bit his lips.
Then I took the reins. cracked the
whip, shouted couple of banzais from
the Japanese national anthem, ant
away we rushed like the wind-wher
IT. isn't blowing hard.
The hours flew by and we mus
have gone at least half mile, whe1
another Kerosene Wagon came bounc
ing towards us from the opposite di
rection.
In 1t was happy party Of ladie!
and gentlemen. who were laughinl
and chatting about some people the!
had just run over
Parsifal saw them coming ant
stopped still in the middle of the road
Then he hung his head as low as h
could, and I believe if that horse hal
been supplied with hands he woul'
have put them over his ears.
The people in the Bubble began t.
shout at us, and I began to shout a
the horse, ana my vile began to shou
at me, while Parsifal stood there an
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Our First Families.

Science tells US that the Tipulidae, or
Daddy Long-legs, were the original in
habitants of North America, and that
they occupied Colorado in vast num-
bers during the tertiary period. It 10
understood that the descendants Of
Colonial families have protested
against this infringement Of theil
yights.-En4lish exchange.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Ingenious Old Clock.

Wells (En9.) has . wonderful clock
one of the oldest in the world. which
dates from 1926. When 1t strikes tho
hour four knights on horseback 90
riding round. and the seated man
kicks two small bells with his heels.
as he has been doing every fifteen
minutes for nigh on six centuries.
This clock was the work of Peter
Lightfoot, another monk Of Glaston-
bury.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Railroad to ee Built Along Panama
for Drawing Ships From Ocean
to Ocean,.

The first shipment of steel has been
made from New York for building a
unique electric railway along the Pan
ANA canal for drawing great ships
from ocean to ocean. The enormous
volume of shipping across the isthmus
will be drawn on the ancient towpath
system, so that it will be unnecessary
flor steamers to proceed under their
2lRn steam. In place of the mules, on
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
GOOD ROADS IN NORTHWEST
Washington State Alive to the I'm.
portance Of Having Service
able Highways.

The northwest is alive to the value
of good roads. In a recent issue of
the Seattle (Wash.) Intelligencer the
statement is made that before the
summer is over Seattle and Tacoma
will be connected by a f1rst-class ma.
cadamized highway. In King county,
of which Seattle is the seat, there
will be $4,000 available, including
state aid, for road improvement this
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Sllxer-Eyed 8ee!steak.

The London cop calls his half-pen.
ny herring his silved-eyed beefsteak.
and there are hundreds cooking every
minute in London town where one IN
eaten here. Any time Of the year .
big part OF this city would profit by
eating fish for 4 spell instead Of beef.
With no open air exercise beef is a
heap harder than fish for the body to
get rid Of, because there is a good deal
more water In fish than in beef or
pork. Fish are fat or lean. Eel. SAL
mon, herring are more than five per
cent. grease. Halibut and mackerel
are two to Ave per cent. fat; cod.
whiting, paddock, even less than two
per: cent.-NeW York Press
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

there is nothing to do but send Johnny
or Lizzie to the nearby town or city,
where the schools are better and
where there is an opportunity getting
the rudiments of an education, and
while Johnny and Lizzie are picking
up an education under town conditions
they are getting the town microbe
along with the education. They form
friendships and become part Of the So
cial life of the school; they are not
willing TO go back upon the farm with
it's dreariness and isolation. No one
ought to blame them for this. in fact
they are to be commended in many
instances. The country lass and youth
must have the social life that natures
demand. This sociological fact must
be reckoned with.
The National Educational commits
sion. made up of eminent educators,
thoroughly familiar with our condi-
tons, mas been studying this subject
for long time, and it says that the
solution is only to be found in the
consolidated township school, where
instead OF eight or ton isolated school
houses, placed at intervals at the cross.
roads throughout tho township-bleak,
dreary and neutrality-suspicious. should
be one central graded school at the
most convenient central point, and pro-
visions made to take the children ia
and from the school. Good roads are
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

year. Much of this will be spent on
trunk line destined to connect Seat
tie and Everett. From Everett to
Tacoma an improved road is a mat
ter of the near future. This road
work is part Of general plan to build
a trunk line from the northern to the
southern boundary of Washington.
which in turn will become part Of a
highway from the Great Lakes to the
ocean, through the northern tier Of
state, and this will connect with an
other trunk line from British Columbia
down the coast to Mexico-a dream
Of that wide-awake country that Is
certain to be realized in the next few
years.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

sPOHN'S DISTEMPER CURE viii
FINK an EYE and hs Ike amoe bcFse:
Of all ages, and prevents all others in tho
same stable from having the disease. Also
cures chicken cholera, and dog distemper.
Any good druggist can supply you, or send
to mfrs. 50 cents and 500 bottle. Agents
wanted. Free book. Spohn Medical Co..
Spec. Contagious Diseases. Goshen. Ind.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

lily, but I tell them Of my good friend,
your Vegetable Compound, and that
there will be no backache and bearing
down pains for them If they will taxa
It as I have. I am scarcely ever with.
out it In tho house.
II will say also that I think there Is
no better medicine to be found for
young girls to build them up and make
them strong and well. My eldest
daughter has taken Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound for pain.
full periods and irregularity, and It has
always helped her.
II am always ready and willing to
speak good word for the Lydia E.
Pinkham's Remedies. I tell every ono
I meet that I owe my health and hap
piness to these wonderful medicines -
Mrs. J. G. JOHNSON, scottvtlle. Mich.
RID. 8.
LYDIA e. Pinkham's Vegetable Com:
pound, made from native roots and
herbs, contains no narcotics or harm.
full drugs, and to-day holds tho record
for the largest number Of actual cures
Of famala diseases.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

The Same, but Different.
when it comes to the task Of TAX
ing up the parlor carpet, do you run
away from the job?"
mo, I beat it."
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

II you want to be up with the lark
In the morning, beware Of the swal-
lows at night
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

Chew and smoke untaxed tobacco. cheap and
undoped. Meriwether Edwards. Clarksviue. Tenn.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

Love is the only thing that more
than pays for all 1t gets.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Sad, but True.

Sad, but True.
Willis-So your military school
wasn't 4 success!
Gillis-No; none Of the pupils could
stay on a horse long enough to have
their photographs taken for the ad-
vertisements of the school.-Judge.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

sion. and will be in working order In
less than two years, in time for the
opening OF the canal.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
Worth Thinking About.

Worth Thinking About.
Eve-Adam, I want you to remem-
Der one thing.
Adam-What's that?
Eve-That when ! am looking the
eyes Of half the world are upon you.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

S Is
Such roads isolation drudgery schools poverty and
ant
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28
OWES
HER
HEALTH
TO Lydia e. Pinkl1amis
Vegetable Compound

Scottville, Mich.-"I want to tell
you how much good Lydia E. Pinkham's
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1911-07-28

1Lyd1a E.Fnknam'o
v eye table Com
pound and Sanative
Wash have done me.
II live on g. farm and
have worked very
hard. I am forty
five years old, and
am the mother of
thirteen children.
Many people think
It strange that I am
not broken dow IN
with hard work and
tho care of my fam
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-03-03
The Stomach Welcomes Quick Relief.

A Stuart's Tablet not only aids diges-
ton but it actually does the digesting
itself. In other words, it furnishes ex
actly the same elements for the diges-
ton of food as the natural juices OF
the stomach. The stomach. therefore,
is not called upon to do any of the
work except to churn the juices fur
nished by the tablet and then push the
digested food along into the intestines
where it will be still further digested
and the strength taken up by the blood
70 be carried to the muscles n nerves
4 the body.
So by taking a Stuart's Dyspepsia
Tablet after a meal you give the stom-
ach the rest it needs in which to mend
itself and grow well again. And you
absolutely prevent the souring of any
food, the formation of any poisonous
gases, belching. foul breath or consti-
patton.
Stuart's Dyspepsia Tablets nave done
more for humanity and have caused
more rejoicing than any other one
agency thai can be named.
Every druggist everywhere sells and
personally recommends Stuart's Dys-
pepsia Tablets. The price is so cents
per box. If you first wish to try them
a sample package vii; be sent ycu free
if you write to F. A. Stuart Co. $50
Stuart building. Marshall. Mich. Z
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1911-03-03
SELLS FURNITURE STOCK
TO CHRISTIAN SCHMIDT co.
Goods Of Eggert Company to Be
Sold at Once.

Owing to the i'll health Of Herman
wagner, who has been managing the
furniture business of Mrs. c. Eggert,
the entire stock of furniture has been
sold to the Christian Schmidt Furni-
ture Company. The stock was pur-
chased at So per cent. of original fac
tory cost.
The c. Eggert Company was estab-
lished forty years ago, and Is at ia
1i6 Ferry street. Its large stock will
be closed out by. the Christian Schmidt
Company in a sale which begins to-
largely attended from the opening day.
During the period of almost a half
century that the Eggert Company has
been IN business It has built a solid
reputation for the excellence of it's
stock and the opportunities afforded
Its customers at all times Of securing
exceptional bargains. .
Among the many customers of this
old business house IT. will be necessary
only to- announce that the stock is to
be sold at a great reduction on it's cost
price to insure the attendance of a
large percentage of Them Others are
being invited by the Christian Schmidt
Company to examine the stock and
Judge for themselves of the remark
able bargains which are being offered.
The necessity of appearing upon the
scene early is urged upon those who
would exercise the greatest possible
range OF choice in making their selec-
tons. The reductions will speak for
themselves, and SO far as the greater
part OF the stock Is concerned will not
have to speak twice.