davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

My brothir Sans birthday Is next
weak. pop sed to ma at suppir last mite,
and as he is about the ony persin In
eether brantch of the family with any
muny to speek OF, and as Sammy Is
named aftir him, think It wood be
wise to rememblr not to forget the
fackt.
Shood we send him sumthing. sed ma,
and pop sed, got the hobby ideer.
lets have -Sammys pickture takin and
send II to Sam with best wishes. II
that's not a hobby ideer. he sed, nevir
herd L
Ma Approves
It's not bad, sed ma, and this moarn-
ing she took me downtown to the foto-
grafers. And pop was watching up
stairs for US wen we got up thare.
Now, Sammy, pop sed, Tor hevens
sakes don't giggiL You spoiled evry
pickture you evir had took by giggling.
he sed, and II yure Unkle Sam gets the
ideer you look like a grinning munkey
he win forgit awl about you wen he
makes his win.
wens he going to make 1t, sed. and
pop sed. That's enuff. now, hears the
fotografer.
The fotografer was a funny littil man
with funny wiskers, and / coodent help
Cycling as soon as saw him, and pop
sed. Well, II you must giggil I CESS its
best to have 1t ovir and dun with a.
the start, so get 1t out of yure sistem
for the love Of LATTER.
So aftir a vile 1 stopped giggiling
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

seemed to be troubling him. He tried
to say something, but the words stuck
in his throat. and the girl, noticing
this, turned the gas even lower.
Suddenly he turned to her and cried.
I'm dub"
NO." she said, fondly. You don't
appreciate yourself as well as some
others do, perhaps. Tee nee"
Yes he persisted stubbornly, TN
dub"
NO" she maintained.
Yes" he almost shouted. 'T'm
dub.'
She was sensible girl, and 50, re-
alizing that he ought to know best, she
thanked him kindly for warning her In
time and handed him his hat. II was
only after the door slammed behind
him forever that she realized the awful
truth.
He had contracted a nawsty cold. and
what he had been trying to say was.
I'm in Lowell
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
THE STAGE DOORKEEPER

"It looks" began the stage struck
youth. "as though we were goin' to
have another epidemic Of Gilman
Corey paragraphs in the papers"
I'll admit" agreed the stage door
keeper, that things do have a ten
dency to slant that way. I haven't
made up my mind what Is the
especial reason for the outbreak, but
1t looks to me as1thpugh Mr.. Corey's
press agent was falling down on his
Job and letting rumors get into print.
An 10 >Kt. Cinch
"Accordin' to all that I've heard
this Job of bein' a millionaire's press
agent has the theatrical Job lookin'
like a counterfeit confederate note.
II what they tell me is true the Job
Is an IS kt. cinch. Now our little
press agents have to be on the Job
not more'n twenty-seven hours out
of twenty-four, when they are rum
ming around in circles, jollying edi-
tors and \ dramatic critics, writing
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

Since then though mems belts have been satisfied the
place, wanderin
the shoulder blades speakn with the ony
stoppn the where the prsors
have the o stay the waist ought o be.
If ony had the Belle; there's material enough in for
second Paradise Lost Is doomed travel home
less till the end time draw funny pictures of
the papers? Talk about the of Adam, Belief
It's An Impositi on On the Men
1t wouldn't sprse Belle if day
should himself the Of fearless
proposn confnin
than inches above think the law would
bring sufern' and embarrassment upon the too.
Don't the fellow Belle that calls his best girl
day after the waine has been officially decided for
the by the dsessmakers union?
Trusnly be his right where the last
called ony the poor girls fghtin' with
hips ben tucked neatly
Where1l be Belle? Millions and millions of civ
ized would the weeks butchers find
advance whether their waists gon to be their elbows
their ankles the Reflect Belle the eveasn
slanin
angle your shoulder inches
which may may be the official
1912 model ~ l.4.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
Loretta's Looking Glass

VOU need no soda fountain drinks
II nor would champagne add to
your exuberance. All that is re-
quired to make you at peace with the
world. satisfied with yourself and
hugely entertained are a few people
and free conversational rein.
on you go! You talk about your
latest man episode. You describe how
you learned to write poetry. You tell
what promise your admirlng circle of
friends discovered in your early youth
You mix in q few anecdotes about
some one you know to illustrate what
distinguished individuals have ac-
knowledged your charm by cultlva.ing
your acquaintance.
Topic For Talk
Some one who realizes that the as
semblage Is not meant to serve as au-
dience for your self-enthusing rushes in
upon your monologue and suggests q
topic for talk. You seize it with the
versatility you have cultivated in fire.
quent wrestings Of conversations to
serve as means for your self-enthusing.
II it's spiritualistic seances, you tell
how, a certain medium informed you of
your gift for seeing the filmy denizens
of another world You dilate upon the
fact that, for nights afterward, you
were afraid to sleep alone lest some
or the spooks, DESTROYS of an acquaint-
ance with so distinguished a person.
might materialize before you.
The quiet little girl with the we'll
bred manner and the air of being able
to say something interesting II you
gave hcr a chance sits and stares at
you with as much fixity as her breed
ing will allow The men In the party
have long since succumbed. They
know you for what you are. a social
inebriate drinking yourself into 6 kind
Of ecstasy with your self-praise. And
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

they come across with the tips about
as gracefully as anybody.
Well, / hoofs 1t around, and the call
was from some strange guy that I'd
never piped in that place before. "Oh,
here y'are," he says, quick and loud.
IF you never made time before make
It now. If you get this bundle up to
this address in three minutes I make
ten thousand dollars. Now scoot."
And say, maybe / didn't scoot Ten
thousand-well, you bet 1 scooted. And
the guy at the address grabs the bun
die at the door and yells Saved" And
/ beats 1t back to Flyer and Sinks,
ard the first guy was all one large
sized grin. Here, son." he says, and
hands me dime.
Some other time" says to him. al
can't change IT now" Fan me.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
SIZE HOLDS TT UP TO TIE
SELF.ENTHUSER

others. Or, at least, you appear to
think that they are. for you elucidate
their peculiarities and their premoni-
tory significance with a thoroughness
that squeezes all interest from the
others.
And when the party is over, you
fairly overwhelm the hostess with your
enthusiast protestations of good time.
Bitterly she reflects that she hopes
the others can say as much. But an
uncomfortable doubt puts her out Of
humor with her entertainment.
And the well-bred girl Is convention
ally polite, but certainly not effusive as
she murmurs her adieux and her thank
you" for an agreeable evening Then,
the hostess KNOWS that you have
spoiled her little Informal party. She
meant II to be a sociabie and comforta-
BILE experience. 1t has been an oppor-
ciable and the others extremely un-
comfortable.
Juicy Resonance
You leave with a puffed-up and we'll
fed mental air. 1t shows in your benef-
cent smile. and the last pleasantries
you call back as you separate yourself
from the scene OF your enthusing. You
regard the party as great success.
You FEEL so GOOD. You have the
sense of well-being which ordinarily ac-
companies a well-filled stomach. Only
yours comes from an imitation of all
your organs OF self-approval and the
Juicy resonance Of your brilliant re-
m-rks lingering like agreeable fiavors
on your mental palate.
You are the champion hypnotizer,
practicing your arts upon yourself and
never realizing that the black magic
shows its sinister color in the disagree
able thoughts you have inspired.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

they are paying the price Of the drafts.
They know 1t is no use to try to put
an end to your debauch. So they sit
around the room saying nothing with
an industry which your uninterrupted
flow of speech cultivates.
Some one mentions dreams. You have
had them. And you take the opportun-
ity to describe their unusualness. The
kind you have had are just a little
more unique than the dreams of the
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
M A ME TELLS BELLE
That the Men Ought TO Stop
Grun1bhng and Consider That
WOMEN HAVE NO WAISTL INE

SEE by the women's pages O. the papers. Belle,
that the big question hasn't been decided yet.
Why, there's on'y big question. o. course
it's INTERESTING to know about the Morocco trouble,
though | always thought Morocco was leather
factry Alaska, and it's INTERESTING to know that
John w. Gates found himself unabl. to take his
forty millions so with him on his last trip, but
the real question O. the hour, Belle, is where the
women's waistlne is gon' to be mex season.
It's been the question of the hour at about this
time every year since Eve established the first
waistline with that famous FIG leaf and yard q
wild
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
They All Can

He-What a glum and dismal wife
you arei ! don't believe you could
be lively or pleasant to save your
life.
Shell may be q dull wife. but just
give me q chance and see what merry
widow would make.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
No Vacationists

Rather a backward summer"
What makes you think so?''
$50 far none of the neighbors has
been over to borrow my suitcase"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
Our Messenger Boy
Says, High Finance

I was sorter tickled when the boss
'ssigned me to call from Flyer and
Sinks. because when these stock bro
kers amt got indigestion or somepin'
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
Now Blow Hard; Or,
A Terrible Error

Sweet was the lass. low was the gas;
* was the evening she expected him
to put across the big question,
He did not look well. Something
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
ENGLISH JOKE FOR TODAY

A police dog saves blind mans life,
and two other dogs, prevent their re-
spective owners from dying of gas
leaks. Obviously the "dog days The
Pink I'm.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
The Lesser and Greater

Doctor-wen. hope you pronted 3y
my adyicef
Patient-Yes. doctop; but not SO much
as you did.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

-EAREST ONE:-Having two letters % at
Nv !: Z s
- My heart keeps singing, "he, too; is counting
the days till we may set date for wedding;
he too, grows weary and hearsck at the wait
ing, and he, is learning economy"
Poor DEAR I'm chin shaving yourself and
SIR. Fifteen day say nothing of the tips
So Wonderfully Beautiful
will add that bank
that and think that learning cook and do laundry
has shine shoes Dear would be
wonderfully beautiful full the glamour
which wouldn't it? The of soemnl seriously
all the habits that ndugent have carefully
say you're going tips" Dearest know
monious perhaps but gather the wai Oh,
honey dabu there I'm only laughing because I'm singing with
happiness a..
table linen Mother will about all
shall need and tomorrow shopping searching
getting piece linen that
buyer, for it's astonishing how much that
A Good Value Seeker"
used walk in order vaguely what wanted and have it
charged and but not bargain hend but good
seeker; would the difference
Do you many many you've away
short passing after ALL though long to look forward
the thought has that after ALL each day.
happy orrowful like the silver thread of
string complete will bring together
wedding shall the clasp hold the days about the throat
Goodnight DEAR awfully go my dreams
of H
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01
It's Good Copy

How do you account for the
rumors Of the separation" asked the
S. s. Y.
It's an easy proposition, bo," re-
sponded the s. D. X. You see in the
first place all miIlionaires make good
copy as my newspaper friends would
say. And this has been a good year
for millionaires. Here's my friend
Stokes that loans his legs to a couple
of girls for target practice He
started the game and lots OF others
followed. Then Jake Astor Grabbed
all the other acts and took the center
of the stage. But even he, with the
help OF Dominic Richmond, couldn't
hope to keep the audience forever So
now they've gone and demanded GIL
man-Corey news, so you can expect
to hear most anything from now on.
Be glad, kid, that you're not a mil
lionaire, cause as you are now you
are not good copy"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1911-09-01

bales Of copy and diggin' up photo
graphs. wearing out typewriters, put
ting distilleries out of business and
the like.
But the other Job, ahl that for
muh. The rich mans press agent
gets paid for not dom anything. All
he has to do is to indorse his cheques
once every week and deposit his pay,
which means that he will keep his
mouth shut. And incidentally he is
supposed to have at hisA disposal an
expense account which he can use
tudiciously to keep other chin music
from falling on the ear Of the public
But we're gettin' away from the
Corey-Gilman pair. 1t seems some
funny that after six years of bliss
that has only been interrupted by re-
porters and photographers that they
should be gettin' back in the lime
light again.,
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
Again Released On Bond.

At Paris last Friday Judge Bulge
took up the case of Earl Haggerty
and Henry Schriber, who Were, by
him, ordered committed to Jail three
weeks ago, the case having been
referred back to the judge by the
supreme court, after that tribunal
had refused to release the men on a
writ of habeas corpus. After hear
ing full and true statement of the
case by counsel for defendants, the
Judge ordered that they be again
admitted to bond, pending the appeal
of the cases to the supreme. Mr.
Haggerty's bond was fixed at $500,
and it was promptly furnished.
Mr.. Schriber, however, has been
unable to furnish bond up to date
and he is still occupying quarters at
Hotel d. Rich in Paris.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

The meeting of the Western
Developm ent association,
which was held in Salt Lake
this week, is bound to result |
in great good to the inter-
mountain region. Plans were
laid for exploiting in a system
attic manner the wonderful re-
sources of the western states,
and sufficient funds have been
pledged to carry on the work.
The first move will be to send
a travelling land products ex-
hibit into the eastern states
next September, and after
visiting some $50 cities, the
exhibit will return to Omaha,
where a big land products
show will be held in October.
The plan is to send out a
train of twelve steel cars of
which ten will be built to car
ry the exhibits of ten western
states banded together in the
league. One will be a moving
picture theatre on wheels and
the other will accommodate
the staff of experts that will
have charge of the train.
Hundreds of films depicting
the glories of the west will be
a part Of the equipment. Not
only will they be shown on
the exhibit train, but will be
sent broadcast through the
east to be thrown on the can
vases of thousands of motion
picture theatres in the larger
cities.
The train will carry tons OF
advertising literature contain
ing information certified to
officially by each state in the
association, it being a prime
idea TO advertise the west II
its true light only. Two ex-
perts will be in charge of each
car, and the whole will DC
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

superintendent by a staff of
ten or twelve officers of the
association.
Ex-Governor Brady was one
of the leading spirits in the
organization of this associa-
ton and besides promising to
devote much of his time to the
work he will contribute liber-
ally to the financial end of
this gigantic crusade for the
upbuilding of the west.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
DAYToN-DIMICK NUPTIALS.

Albert Dimick of Marlboro and
Miss Maude Dayton of Dingle, were
united in marriage last Wednesday
evening. The ceremony was per-
formed by Bishop Humphreys in the
presence of about 20 friends of the
contracting parties. Mr.. and Mrs.
Dimick We're the recipients of many
fine presents.
On Monday evening Mis- Dayton
was given a 'dish shower" by her
young friends, who assembled at her
home and spent most enjoyable
evening. She was presented with a
large number of fine pieces of china
and cut glass.
Mr.. asd Mrs. Dimick are populai
young people of their respective com
nlunities and they start on LIES
journey together with the best wishes
of aNhost of friends.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
Election Proclamation.

Notice is hereby given that the regular bien
NAL election for the City of Montpelier Idaho
VIII held on Tuesday. the 4th day of April, lqiI
ior tine purpose of electing she following ofRcers
ior a term oil two years each. viz;
One City Clerk.
One City Engineer.
One Police Judge.
One Treasurer.
TWO Councilmen from the First Ward
Two Councllmen from the Second Ward
Ewo COunctlmen from the Third Ward
The First Ward comprises all TINT portion of
the city OF Montpelier east of north and south
ifne drawn through the centr of Sixth street
Voting place. City Hall.
Registrar. Mrs Emily Cozzens
Inc second Ward comprises all that portion
OF the city OF Montpelier between a north and
south line drawn through the center OF Sixth
street aud north and south line drawn thru
the center OF Ninth street.
Voting place
Registrar. Mrs. Chas Schmid.
Ihe 'rhird Ward comprises all that partition of
the city OF Montpelier west of a north and south
line drawn through the center of Ninth street
Voting place, City police station
Registrar, Mrs. A. g. Hunter
The polls will be open at O'Clock n m and
remain open until O'Clock p. m. OF said day
In testimoney whereof 1 have hereunto sat
my hand this 9th day OF February laIi
Attest. 80 4A3ses'
VIM. ], RYAN, City clerk.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

If You have trouble in getting rid of
your cold you may know that you are
not treating it properly. There is no
reason why cold should hang on for
weeks md ] will not il yon take Cham
berlain's Cough Remedy. For sale by
Modern Drug Co.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
Montpelier, Idaho, Mar. "a, 1911


; Hereafter people will have
to confine the deposit of tin
cans and other rubbish to
their back Yards and alleys,
as the legislature passed a law
making it a misdemeanor to
use public highways for dump
ing grounds. Now if the Of
ficers will see that this law is
enforced the streets of Mont
pelier and many of the country
roads will present a much
better appearance.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

And in rccordance with law and the order of
the hoard of directors made on the 18th day OF
Feb 1911, unless said delinquent assessment to
gether with the costs OF this advertisement be
paid prior thereto; so many shares OF each
parcel OF stock as may be necessary will be sold
at public auction in front of Clarks Grocery
Store In Montpelier. Bear Lake County, Idaho,
at the hour of - o'clock noon On the 10Th day
of March, A. D. 1911. to pay delinquent asse-
ments thereon together with cost of advertising
and expense Of sale.
THOMAS NJ. MUMFoRD, Pres.
FRANCIS u. WINTERS, Stcty.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
Conference Rates.

Via the Oregon Short Line Railroad
for April Mormon Conference. Tickets
on sale from all points north of Ogden
up to Spencer Idaho, April Bird, to Sth.,
inclusive, limited 10 April 18th. See
Agents for rates and further particu-
Iars
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

When you have rheumstism in your
foot or instep apply Chamberlain's Lin
iment and you will get quick relief. 1t
costs but quarter. Why suffer? For
sale by M ,dern Drug Co.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
Delinquent Notice.

Montpelier Irrigation Company, principal
place of business Montpelier, Idaho.
There is delinquent upon the following des-
cribed stock on account of assessments levied
May IA. 1909 and June 10, 1910, the several
amounts set opposite the names of the respec.
tive stock holders as follows, to-wit:
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24
$3.50 Reward.

offer reward of $3.50 for informa-
ton that will lead to the arrest and
of the person or persons
who set fire to the hay stacks on my
ranch last November and caused the
destruction of l35 tons of hay.
b. BUNDERsON,
st. Charles, Idaho.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1911-03-24

If you want good meal when ii
Paris, call at the Cottage hotel.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-07-21
WHAT DAWSON THINKS.

Skagway has aroused considerable interest in other places by deciding to build the samplng mill. The Daw- son News recently published the complete story of the mass meeting which was printed in the Alaskan and then comments as follows;
 While Dawson has been sparring and talking for a sampling mill, Fair banks has erected two. and has them grinding with great success, and Skagway now has come to the front and has held an enthusiastic mass meeting, declaring in favor of a stamp mill for that town. Fred Heu- ig, editor of the Fairbanks Times. who passed through Dawson recently from a visit to the coast, writes to the News that the thing which im- pressed him on arrival in Fairbanks was the large number of quartz led ges being opened, and the success at taiDed in grinding out gold, Pokes were coming to town rom the mills,
 The Skagway movement was talk ed of but a few days, and then went through with a whoop. General Man ager Dickson of the White Pass was one of the enthusiastic boosters"
The daily Alaskan., 1911-07-21
THE KNocKER.

The kUocker is a most despicable character and seems to be indigenous to all countries and sections of couu- tries, He exists under au climatic conditions. Like baciB of mbercuI osts knockers are universally pres eut. but do bu, little harm to the beuthy and strong.
 Skagvay has two or three Of these germs taaJ have failed in all their ef- forts to accomplish anything of note. Every aysemp, to do anything for themselves individually has been a complete failure. The idea that tbere may be chance for the people to do something by concerted action that will rgsul, m permanent benefit to ybe town, Is gallus to these mic robes og calamity
 You can see these fellows about town and know tbem instantly by me visual angle which is always directed toward the pou, og Che nose. They look down in Che mouth. and are al. ways there uiA sgatui,ous advice to strangers within the place, that no good can come to Skagway.
 It is always ae distant pasture ha, looks green to che knocker and he iDdusu5ousg works on schemes to have his fellows help him m the promotion og something at a distance, After repeated failures he comes back to be eudaled into life again that he may once more commence his career. uassmg and irritating those who are really doing something to develop Che community and it's re- sources.
 Somebody said that it was good for dog yo have a certain number og Geas for 1t made him forget at times tbat he was a dog, Perhaps the kUocker may have some useful place in tbe scheme of things but no community has yet discovered what it may le.
The daily Alaskan., 1911-07-21

Don't let little parasitic microbe of Begation nor a germ of mental dyspepsia disturb your pOise and eonfidence-Skagway is on the min ing map to stay