The evening world., 1911-05-23
@
Court
Justice
Guy
Discusses
The
Marriage
RELATION
%

By Marcuerffe Mooers Marshall.
what IL the average length OF
the marriage h 10 ended by .
divorcc7
How long n duration OF years IL
necessary b~fore a marriage may
be called happyp
A ~well-known Philadelphia society
woman has been compiling a list OF sue
cessful marriages in her W set. and
she has excluded all save those who
have enjoyed a dozen years Of marital
felicity. She has reached the conclu-
sion. from studying the divorce courts.
that In the course of q decade the hus-
band or wife finds out the matrimonial
mistake, II It exists, and seeks the
courts. II they continue together two
years over the ten II means. to her
mind. that they have been convinced
that the affection Is lifelong.
Yesterday 1 showed her conclusions
TO Supreme Court Justice Charles L..
Guy. who has presided over hundreds
OF divorce trials In the City OF New
York.
Since there II no such thing as mar
riage insurance" the Justice observed.
with a smile. 1T Is impossible to predict
the period of risk with statistical ac-
curacy. You know In Italy parents take
= insurance for their daughters on
the day of their birth that they will
marry.
Why Not rIvorce l%nsurance7
From the hit-or-miss state into which
the prevalence of divorce has brought
married people In our country l some
, - wonder why there Is no such thing
as marriage Insurance.. to be taken out
on the wedding day. to indemnify the
contracting parties for not staying mar
ried. Then we would have a fine row
OF statistics on the average age OF d.
vorce.'
seriously, though, In my sx-
perience I have 70 nd hat the ma
jority OF divorces occur during tho
FIRST FIVE years Of welded life. II
two people live together ten years
tho anc are that they have de-
oided that their union II happy"
But why do the divorces come 30
early?"
Because at first the newly welded
couples care too much and afterward
not enough" Justice Guy responded.
wisely. Between the two stools OF
alteration and Indifference they fall.
NO man and woman should marry
unless each feels that happiness Is I'M
possible without the other. But the
worshipful alteration of courtship and
the early days OF married life Is a con-
dition above concert pitch that cannot
In nature be maintained. 1t Is as II We
tried TO carry on all our conversation
on the note of high C, instead Of talking
in ordinary tones.
When the Trouble Comes.
"Ths happy marriage u for
the most part oonsist OF loyal,
equabls ~comradeship, not in .
state of e~xaltatton. I. 10 In this
reimbursement to the A~comradsship
plano that the trouble 10 likely to
come.
perhaps the husband is inclined to
become boss instead OF lover. Perhaps
the wife would like to continue a
worshipped queen instead OF becoming
a real 'hclpmate.' In either case out
RACED var.i,y is at the bottom OF the
trouble.
IT believe that wounded vanity
on the part Of both men and wom-
on IL the great reason for most
divorces.
Each party feels a lack OF constdera-
ton on the part OF the other. There
fore they quarrel and perhaps finally
agree TO disagree.
sua,IJnptat1r N,p4t ~ a , nee ittsf here
the real reason why. II they a keep
together for the first FIVE years their
happiness is likely TO be lasting. Young
people are Unfortunately vain. AS they
grow older they mast get II taken out
of them, After a few years OF grating
and super-sensltiveness they suddenly
rec , that they do care more for each
other than for their own silly selves.
Then the way is clear"
But don't you find tnat the families
OF bride and br. ON are apt to be
specially interfering in the first years OF
MARRIAGE" l suggested.
Motner-in-Law Mallgned.
THE american mother-in-law has
been very much maligned." said Justice
Guy. In the case OF a marital dispute
NlAo AilbAt 49, ~ F"N'
himself-or herself-behind the convenI
ent fiction of the mother-in-law. But
have generally fou that person to be
on the side Of right and Justice. even II
she had TO tn n stand against ncr
own flesh and blood. The mother-!n-
law is a sensible American woman. you
must remember"
And how about the other man or
the other woman as a factor?"
THAT person Is a SYMPTOM. not a
cause, of unhappy married life, It's a
sign Of wonded vanity cropping up
again. Husband or wife. not receiving
sufficient adulation at home. seeks II
elsewhere. The other man and other
woman need not trust much in the
love they are getting. They are fire.
quently only mental and moral sofa
pillows.
"a chlldless marriage Is often an I'M
happy one for this reason. When a
woman is continually occupied with