River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1911-12-21
ELECTRIC SPARKS

potatoes at S3.OU a sack are not to
be sneezed at.
A girl can get more pouting dur
ing courtship than she can by shout
| ing after marriage.
The strangest thing about cam
paign publicity bureau is the num-
Der of secrets it has.
The wool and cotton men are on
their way to Washington to spend
the winter vacation.
Every woman would study geog-
raphy if the boundary lines we're
lace work or hemstiched.
Strange that we should have SO
many foggy days only since Con-
gress resumed its sessions.
1t looks as if the Tobacco Trust,
when it made plans to dissolve
itself, were right up to snuff.
Uncle Joe Cannon pre-emptorily
refused to name list of the twenty
greatest women. Jealous thing.
The McNamaras find that they
can stun more people with confess
sion than they can with dynamite.
Owing to the high cost of living
Uncle Sam estimates his housekeep-
ing expenses next year at $745, 000,-
600.
Mr.. Pinchot fears that he will
have TO organize party of his own
in order to get one that will suit
him.
That Minnesota man who claims
to have lost money by dealing with
Rockefeller is merely one of about
100000.
The confession in the Mcnamara
case has interested Detective Burns
so much that he would like to hear
some more.
Mr.. Gary, the steel trust boss,
wants a commission to curb the
trusts. But who is going to curb
| the commission?
Mr.. Carnegie should have one of
his own hero medals for naming the
worlds 20 greatest men and leaving
| himself off the list
An Illinois woman has just mar
ried man who shot iier fourteen
| times. Most of US surrender before
a single shot is flied.
It may be necessary for the Out
look to get out daily edition SO
that Col. Roosevelt can keep up
with those messages.
1t takes bride with a vivid mag
| nation to keep on believing it is
still the honeymoon when she is
busy at the washtub.
Carnegie picked out twenty great
men, mostly of his own line of trade.
Even Shakespeare, the Baconites
claim, was in the steel business.
Los Angeles is to have school
for matrimony. If experience calls
for anything the first call for a pro-
lessor should go to Nat Goodwin.
The way women who have killed
their husbands are being acquitted
may well make the lawyers fear
falling off in the divorce business.
DR.. Woods Hutchinson says four
hours work day is enough for any
man. He must believe it proper to
| let the women do most of the work.
Edison's declaration that this
country needs men of brains and
not politicians who supposed they
had brains" will meet with approx
al.
One admirable point about the
Shakespeare-Bacon investigation is
that it is not conducted at the ex-
pense of the ultimate consumer or
taxpayer.
The police officer who thinks he
can solve murder mystery by fol-
lowing a clue suggested by dream
should be advised that even Sher-
lock Holmes never dreamed of such
a thing.
Philadelphia is going to have a
business administration, with ex-
perts to fill the expert positions and
not single boss or ward politician
consulted. That's the way to adj
vertiSe.
1t is seriously announced that an
Indian boy would like to be appoint
ed as a page in the U. S. Senate.
Some members insist that there are
a good many young Indians among
the pages now.
| Thomas A. Edison says he's 10
years old because he has worked Is
hours a day for a long time. He
wants to live to be $50. And, at
that rate some of the editors we