davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-09-08
A SpitefuI Exception.

Will like that girls manner.
There is nothing put on about her.
.sNell-Oh, nothing at all-except her
onplexion.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1911-09-08
OF THE pLAMS
(by RANDALL pARRISf1..

AUTHOR Or M LADY Or Tie. SOUTH. Nm
'WiEn MLoERhEse Was kino. frc.frt wv
iLLusreArrors Br DEARBsR1 NElvnEl~
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
How Mckinley Got a Job.

Congressman Duncan Mckinley. the
silver-tongued lame duck from Califor.
MIA, vino was defeated in his own dis
trict last November while he was dis.
pensing Republican oratory in other
parts Of the country, was in the east
right after election. He met President
Taft In New York.
"Awfully sorry you were defeated.
said the president.
"Yes, so am l." admitted the con.
gressman, with tone that was as
good as an affidavit. But I am not
going out of public life"
That's good; what are you going to
do?" asked the president.
Don't know yet, but I'm going to
have position in the public service
I'm willing to leave that to you"
The president laughed. and 80 did
the congressman. The story goes that
Mr.. Mckinley filed on two or three
good things that were found already
preempted and finally got his eye on
the collectorship Of the port Of San
Francisco.
He gets the job and will remain In
public life.-Washington Times.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

The Oak bungalow of India is a
blessed institution for the weary Oak,
as the natives call the traveller. He
finds these little shelters dotted over
many of the out-ofthe-way parts of
the country, generally not more than
one long days march apart. They
mean warmth when one has been
chilled to the bone by biting winds, or
shelter from the driving rain and hail
storms, the latter so common in north
ern India that planters insure their
crops against them, and so violent
that both men and cattle are often
killed by them. The bungalows usu-
ally consist Of two bedrooms and a
dining room, with rough outside build
ings providing kitchen and sheds for
horses and coolies.
After our life in the untrodden for
ests of South America, 1t was camping
de luxe.-Mary Blair Beebe, in Har.
per's Magazine.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
(By J. e. BRIDGMAN.)

One of the most convenient and
modern farmhouses Of moderate cost
the writer has seen is owned by
farmer in Ohio. 1t Is comfortable
and handsome, and the farmer and
his family enjoy practically all of the
advantages that are to be found In
city homes. The house has few an
giles and corners and 1t may be built
at an approximate cost Of $4,000 to
$4,000, and contain many of the i'm
provements essential to comfort, util-
ity and beauty.
The main or front part Of the house
pantry 14x20 feet. The lower story Is
feet high and the second story s
feet inches. The exterior walls
are covered with shiplap and lap sid
ing with building paper between. The
roofs are covered with best grade Of
S to 2 cedar shingles, that Is, five Of
the shingles, when placed together,
will measure practically 2 inches at
the thick ends. These shingles will
cost slightly more but they will also
last about three times as long as the
to shingles.
All interior side walls and ceilings
receive three coats of plaster with
white finish. All floors are quarter
sawed yellow pine. The trim for din
ing-room, living-room, hall and H.
brary Is of birch with mahogany
stain The kitchen and pantry has
hard pine trim with oil finish.
Entire second floor has pine trim
with fiat tints except bathroom, which
has enamel finish.
A good solid limestone or cement
foundation is placed under the house
and a basement excavation under the
front part. A hot-alr furnace is
placed in the basement, also hollow
wire lighting plant. The furnace and
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Wanted to Know.

Tommy had been taken to church
for the first time, and there was much
about it that interested him. 1t was
Just before the sermon that his curios-
ity got the better of his silence.
"Muvver," he whispered.
Hush, dear" said his mother.
"Wait until church is over"
But, muvver, want to know sum.
pin," said Tommy.
well. you must wait, DEAR" said his
mother.
I'm atwaid I'll fordet, muvver," he
pleaded.
VERY we'll, then, what is it?" said
the good lady, bending down to catch
the little chaps words.
What does dat minister wear his
nightgown for. Amt he got any py.
jamis?' asked Tommy.-Harper'
Weekly.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

and social obligation, resting at least
as strongly on the farmer as on any
one else, to encourage family life
among workers, and thus to promote
stability In rural populations and to
discourage the nomadism among Ia
borers which is the bane Of our agri-
cultural enterprises.
1t is altogether probable that the
actual decline in population, shown
by the last census to have taken
place in extensive agricultural areas,
is due to the Encouragement Of mar
riage among farm workers, and the
refusal of employment to men with
families.
That way lies the decline OF states
and the ruin of democracy. II we
want growth In population, and the
perfect working out Of the Demo-
cratic ideas underlying American in.
stitutions, we must reverse our meth
DDS, welcome rather than repel the
man with a family, and be willing to
share with him some portion of the
opportunities of the farm.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
LOOKS AFTER THE PENNIES
Good Stories Told Of Harry Lauder,
the Popular Little Scotch
Comedian.

Harry Lauder, little Scotch comedt
an, the greatest exponent Of simon pure
thrift Broadway ever knew, the man
who never let guilty penny escape,
has been separated, disentangled." as
1t were, and as a result he is out just
$4,000. A Boston financial Napoleon
induced the wee Scot to invest $4,000
in copper stock which is worthless.
Getting $4,000 from Lauder brands
him as youth deserving of the title
Napoleon of Finance.
To illustrate LADDERS frugality this
story is told of how Gus Ellen. Brit
ish music hall favorite, once heard that
Harry was saving more money than
he (Elen) was saving. He went to
LADDERS room to ask how he managed
1t.
wait till I blow out the candle"
said Lauder, "and I'll tell you"
Another time, when Lauder was In
New York he was in wine-buying
party at the Astor. Everybody but the
Scot bought wine When 1t came his
turn to buy he sighed:
We'll, boys" he said, "it's my turn
to treat. Come along with me. I've
got fine bottle of old Scotch up In
my room-I brought 1t over with me-"
On another occasion he was with a
drinking party, and instead of liquor
he took cigars, for which those who
treated him paid 80 cents apiece.
Harry put all but one in his pocket.
He spent two hours smoking that one.
After the drinking was over the little
comedian went to the cigar counter
and said to the man In charge: II say,
man, wud ye mind givin' me 10-oent
cigars for these 5O-cent ones?" The
exchange was made and Harry went
to his room with five times as many
cigars as he had at the start.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
HUSBAND SMOKED IN PARLOR
Visitor Is Finally Enlightened on Rea
son for Breach Of Discipline
Coat Was Afire.

The visitor sn1fred.
Excuse me, DEAR" she said, but
what a smell of smoke there is In this
room! You surely don't allow your
husband to smoke in the drawing
room?"
"Well, not as rule" replied her
hostess, but this morning"
my DEAR" exclaimed the visitor,
you should never make exceptions in
cases like this. l never do. My Fred
iy never smokes in our drawing room
On any consideration whatever"
"Yes," began the young wife, "but
Nonsense, darling! There are no
butts at all! In the first place, it's for
the sake of discipline. In the second.
the ashes absolutely ruin ones car
pets. And as for the thick air-Poof!"
II quite agree, sweet" exclaimed
the lectured one, spiritedly, getting In
word at last But this morning my
husband simply had to smoke"
Indeed" said the visitor, raising
her eyebrows. And why?"
Because" retorted her hostess, "his
coat was on flre!"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
RACE SUICIDE >''>''''.
AMONG FARMERS
Decline In Population Shown by
Last Census In A9 ltura1
Areas Due to discourage.
ment ofMarrAed Workers.
(By c. r. BARNS.)


The pitiful story was told recently
in northern daily paper of an in
dustrious and capable farm laborer
who had answered several advertise
merts Of farmers In need Of just such
experienced services as he was able
to render; but whose application was
rejected, in each instance, because he
had a wife and two small children.
The farmers wanted neither women
nor children about their farms. So
this competent farm worker was
obliged to accept employment in a
city stable.
1t is to be feared that this is by no
means an isolated instance Human
kindness has been SO far eliminated,
in many cases, from the relationship
between the farmer and his hired
help, and that relationship has been
put so exclusively on hard business
basis, that the complaint is common
that the farmer cares more for the
comfort and happiness of his cattle
and hogs than he does for the we'll
being of his men,"
Under healthier conditions In rural
life, the married workman would re-
ceive the same preference that he
generally does from employers in
mercantile and manufacturing pur-
suits; as being more reliable and less
likely to seek change, If fairly we'll
treated, than the single man. Aside
from this, however there is moral
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

In her way there was no better
woman than Miss Bessie Randalls
Aunt Jane Plaster, spinster, having
her own farm and living according to
her own lights. She was full of sym
pathy and charity and good deeds, but
"propriety" had been her motto SO
long that even her best friends thought
she carried matters too far when she
withdrew from the church because the
minister called and found her up a
cherry tree picking fruit. For prim-
ness and preciseness and propriety
Aunt Jane was without rival.
In after days, and not so very long
after, either, Aunt Jane admitted to
herself that she must have been
crazy when she wrote up to the city
for her niece, Bessie, to spend July
with her. She hadn't seen the girl for
several years AS she remembered her.
Bessie was a long-legged child with a
lonesome face and demure demeanor,
who would sit and play with rag doll
by the hour and ask few questions.
She had two real rag dolls made be-
fore she wrote the letter Of invitation.
She also had decided In her own mind
that she would let the child chase
grasshoppers in the back lot and climb
fences, but she must not chase or
climb boisterously-only properly.
you, dear, darling old thing of an
aunt, but | could just stand on my
head for gladness!" was the greeting
the spinster received one day two
weeks later when a girl of eighteen
was deposited at her gate by the stage
from Sherlockyille. The aunt felt
chlls Of horror creep up and down
her spine, but before she could do
more than utter a groan the young girl
seized her and waltzed her around
actually waltzed her up the path be-
tween the rows Of pinks and peonies
and hollyhocks, with the hired man
looking on!
That evening, after Miss Bessie had
talked about rowing, swinging Indian
clubs, pitching quoits, bathing, climb
ing trees and riding about in the cleo
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
An Attractive Farm Dwelling.
Ighting plant may be installed at a

lighting plant may be installed at q
cost of 1915.
AS both the heating and lighting
plants are entirely safe, easy to oper-
ate and the expense of running them
less than the cost of operating or us-
ing oil lamps and stoves, it would
seem that their use would pay, to say
nothing of the added comfort and
pleasure derived from them.
The furnace will without doubt pre-
vent much sickness If the fresh air
shaft is properly installed, and the
gas lights will save the housewife
much labor; also you will have light
equal to any city light electricity not
excepted.
The cellar has an inside entrance
under the main stairway, also an out
side entrance.
Root cellar, front room, ETC.. are
provided in the basement.
The pantry Is 30 located that 1t pre-
vents the heat from entering the din
ing-room during the summer months
and contains china closet with doors
opening to dining-room, cupboard.
-four bin, etc.
All rooms are of good size well
lighted, and ample closet room Is pro-
vided; also a good-sized linen closet.
The living-room has an open fire
place which also has smoke flue for
the furnace. The large arches con-
Meeting the dining groom, hall and liv-
ing-room causes these rooms to seem
larger than they really are, and with
suitable rugs, curtains, ETC., a beauti-
full effect may be obtained.
The house has no fancy work, but
when neatly painted will present a
very good front and will not look out
Of place on almost any building lot,
and for many reasons this building
seems especially adapted to rural dis.
tricts.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

trio runabout her father was to send
down to her-talked and never OBJ
served the pallor Of her aunt's face
nor her primness Of demeanor-after
she Aad talked and gone to her room,
Aunt Jane said to tho hired man:
James, something has got to be
done"
"Ycs'm. something has," he replied.
"You saw my niece waltz me
around?"
81 saw, ma'am"
"And was properly shocked?"
Very properly"
And you may have caught some of
her words about climbing trees,
swinging clubs she bought Of an In
dian, bathing In the river and riding
about the country on machine Of
some kind? You were also shocked
again."
Properly shocked, Miss Plaster"
Then you must agree with me that
we must take certain steps to save
my niece from herself. She Is q dear
girl and sweet girl. and she must
not be allowed to fall into hoydenish
ways. She must be reduced to state
of propriety and that without offend
ing her"
She must, ma'am-she must" sol
emnly answered James,
Fortunately for u.s." continued Miss
Plaster as a look of mingled hope and
relief showed In her face, I'VE are sit.
uated within two miles OF the insane
asylum. Insane patients now and then
escape and 60 roaming over the coun.
try. II my niece were to be told that
a male lunadc had escaped from the
place and was Mt liberty, and that he
think she would want to go gallivant.
ing around In that what-do-you-call.
It,"
"She surely wouldn't, ma'am."
"Nor do any climbing of trees nor
clubbing of Indian clubs II you have
heard Of any male lunatic escaping
from the asylum within day or two,
and haven't said anything about II be-
cause you feared to render me nervous
and perturbed, It will be your duty to
notify my niece early In the morning."
On the following morning James
found opportunity to say to the Wis.
itor:
Miss Randall, did your aunt men
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

"How much is lower berth?" ask
ed the man in front Of the Pullman Of.
ace window.
Five dollars" replied the man be-
hind.
And how much Is an upper?"
-Four dollars"
Then the higher berths are lower?"
Eyes, SIR"
"And the lower berths are higher?"
Exactly"
well, I'll take lower berth II
they're higher"
"I'm sorry, but I have no lower
berths left"
Got an upper%
"Yes."
"But these are lower?"
Sure"
well, then, the higher the fewer
-Yonkers Statesman.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

Impure milk will be the result If the
utmost precautions are not taken in
handling 1t, and impure milk neces,
sarily means that its products will al,
so be impure and have very poor
keeping qualities. 1t should be remem.
bered that all contamination depends
upon some form Of bacteria, which
are present everywhere and which
multiply very readily under certain
conditions and temperatures.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
The Woman's Wav

Many a married man who nigh,
make a fortune is handicapped be
cause his wife demands too much Of
his attention"
That's right. Just as soon as for
tune begins to f1irt with him his wifi.
gets Jealous. catholic Standard and
Times.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Failed to Please

YES" said Mrs. Proppin, 'T have
had Is cooks in three months"
"Oh you surely don't mean that
rejoined Mrs. Athome.
IT'S the truth" replied Mrs. Dron
inn, with a deep sigh, and what i,
more, didn't please any of than
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Poor Baby,


Nurse. has the baby had a pow
der?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"And those hpyophosphites?"
"Yes, maam."
"And the magnetism"
eyes, ma'am."
Did you put a poultice on his
back?"
Eyes, ma'am."
"And cold compress on his chest?-
"Yes, ma'am."
"And he's no better?"
mo, ma'am."
How strange! I think we had
better send for the DOCTOR"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

Doing well, young man, I see."
mo; Just struggling along"
But that fine adding machine?"
"A demonstrator left 1t on trial"
THAT new typewriter
"An agent forced 1t on me for
month"
AT least those expensive cigars de-
note ready money"
mo; l smoke ten and return the
rest"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

Friend-Why do you have such mis-
spelled and ungrammatical signs 4
your front window?
Sharp Tradesman-People think I'm
q Ounce and come in to swindle ms
Trades Just booming.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
On an Auto Ride.

Sentimental Daughter-Oh, father!
Look! Isn't the dying day beautifulY
Practical Parent awakening from
nap)-Whst? Where is It? didn't
know we hit anything Puck.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Iananese Farmers.

or Japan's 100000 people, So.0o0,.
900 are farmers, The whole body is
supported by cultivated area of but
$4,000 square miles. Every foot Of
soil is utilized; the farmer is special
iSt
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
A Polite EXPLANATION.

"You used to send me candy and
flowers" said Mr.. Meekton's wife.
Yes, Henrietta; but, you know, In
those days could do what liked
with my salary"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Accidental.

John was good-natured man,
and was never heard to speak i'll Of
anyone. But now he's got an au.
tomobile,"
HAS that made difference In
him?"
"A decided difference, Now he Is
always running his neighbors down"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
Erom Week 70 Week.

you take good many maga,
zines"
six"
THAT beats my capacity. I can't
carry over four sets of serial stories
In my head"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02

Binks-Is 1t hard to propose to
girl?
Blinks-Depends on the girl.
Binks-How so?
Blinks-f she has been out several
seasons 1t Is hard not to-"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1911-06-02
cow TESTING IS VALUABLE

Myrtle with herd
The
he
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-01-24
RAILWAY LINE IS CHARTERED.
Organizes With :, Capital of Fifty
Thousand Dollars.

The Orangeburg Railway which,
it is stated, will be ultimately ex-
tended to Columbia, Charleston and
Augusta, has been chartered by the
secretary OF state, the capital being
$4,000. The road will run from Or
angeburg to sprin g,feld, distance
of 80 miles, and will do general
freight and passenger business.
The officers OF the new road are:
W. C. Wolfe, Orangeburg, president;
Joseph A. Berry, OraE5eburg, secre-
tary. The board of directors are:
W. C. Wolfe and Joseph. A. Berry OF
Orangeburg and Lawrence Manning
of Sumter.
In the declaration of the corpora
tors it is stated that $500 per mile
has been subscribed and the capital
paid in is distributed among the
stockholders rs follows: W. c. Wolfe,
$4,000; Joseph A. Berry, $1,000;
Lawrence Manning, $1,000
The new road will be entirely
within Orangeburg county and will
pass through one Ct the richest sec
tions of the State. Just when the
company proposes to make the ex-
tensions to Charleston, Columbia and
Augusta is not stated in the petition.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-01-24
VERY SERIOUS FIRE.
Residence OF Mrs. G. Edwin Stokes
&, ~ BADLY Damaged. &

Monday morning about three
O'Clock fire was discovered in the
kitchen of Mrs. G. Edwin Stokes on
Church street opposite St. Paul Meth
odist church. The Kitchen is at
tached to the residence and the fire
soon communicated to that, and had
made some headway before 1t was
discovered. The fire department re-
sponded promptly and soon had the
FIRE under control. The, Kitchen was
badly damaged, but the gallant fire.
men extin :; s;a:!shed the fire before it
had damaged the residence much.
Mrs. Stokes has number Of
boarders, Ss,me Of whom lost nearly
all their belongings before the fire
could be extinguished. Rev. J. II.
Wilson, D. d., pastor OF, the Luth-
eran church, who is one Of her boar I
ers, lost nearly all of his clothes,
books, and other things. OF the
boarders he was tie heaviest loser.
TIE house was foU led with water,
which damaged the furniture OF Mrs,
Stokes and the; clothes and other
things Of the other boarders. This
could not be avoided as the fire had
crept into the upper part OF the
house.
The origin Of the fire IS unknown,
but is supposed to have been caused
by defective fue. Some months ago
the kitchen caught on the roof in the
daytime, but was extinguished before
much damage was done. Consider
ing the unreasonable hour at which
the fire was discovered Monday morn-
ing the fremen did fine work to save
the building from being DESTROYED
entirely. We are glad to know that
Mrs. Stokes had some insurance on
her furniture. We hope her loss was
fully covered.
The times and democrat. [volume] (Orangeburg, S.C.) 1881-current, 1911-01-24
"Gone to 8 Peaceful Rest"

On Monday, Jan. Is, Mrs. l.. N.
SHEER OF the North Providence Sec
ii. II passed away to her home above.
Mrs. Shuler had been in declining
health for several years, and lately
had been prevailed upon by her doc
tors to go to the hospital In Char
lesion and have an operation per-
formed. She never recovered and
after suffering the intensest pain
that it seems that mortal could bear
she succumbed to her disease.
Through I'll her suffering she was
wont to say, Dear Jesus, help me
to bear the pain, and more patient
Christian never suffered and died.
Mrs. Shuler was Miss Sallie Arant
prior to her marriage and has been
a consistent member Of Antioch
Baptist church ever since she was
married and a beautiful Christian
character she was, well loved by all
WHO knew her, and real mother to
all our young people. She leaves
husband and seven children to mourn
her loss. We feel especial sympathy
for her husband and two single boys,
for scarce two years ago their only
single sister was taken to Heaven.
and now their mother and only lady
in the house is gone.
Dear friends. LET not your heart
be troubled, for your loved one is
resting on the bosom of our mighty
Savior now, and her earthly trou-
bles and sufrerings are over.
A Friend.