The Detroit times., 1911-04-26
INTIMATE CORRESPONDENCE


Dear Dad: The thing most wanted
around the Ordnance Bureau OF the
Navy Department is goat. ne
should be a long whiskered, self-sacri
ficing animal. prepared TO accept the
sins of the whole navy department
! II necessary. The need for a goat
dates from the sinking OF the Puritan
and the blowing up OF the latest
Bethlehem gun that regrettable III
cident that resulted in the death OF
half a dozen men at Indian Head
few months ago. A careful inquiry
was held on the Indian Head al
fair-oh. how many weeks ago-and
somewhere, like Mohammed's coffin,
the verdict is hanging between sky
and earth. Also a courtmartial was
held after the sinking OF the Puritan
TO determine why the old monitor
was permitted to sink instead OF be.
ing towed into the dock during tho
forty eight hours which interviewed
between its being dynamited and Its
descent into the Potomac mud. II
looked very much as IL Captain
Knight, the officer in command OF the
Puritan experiments. would be con-
victed and sent TO Jericho in response
TO the demand of congress that some
body be held responsible. But Cap
tain Knights wife died about that
time, and il seemed rather hard lines
that he should be selected as the goat
for one of those unavoidable happen
stances which will occur in the worst
regulated governments, so Captain
Knight received friendly tip that
he had been exonerated. Captain Mar
| hn nhnfnn for Tho
goat, he being in charge Of the Nor
folk Yard. into whose slip the Puri'
tan should have been towed, had UNI
fortunately been previously exonerat-
ed. This left the supply OF goats
peculiarly short. In fact the demand
seemed so insistent and the supply SO
scanty that Admiral Mason at tho
head of the Ordnance Bureau began
TO feel bit uneasy. He discovered
that suspicious glances were cast by
the goat committee in his direction,
and remembering that his retirement
was only a few months of, he duck
ed. He filed at once a request that
!: he be placed on the retired list anu
that some other officer be appointed
10 his duties This eliminates Admir-
al Mason from the goat class, and
now IL looks as II Armour or the
Swift Packing Company would have
, TO come TO the rescue.
, An excellent speech on popular
, government was delivered April IL,
, by Senator Chamberlain OF Oregon,
speaking to the text of the Arizona
! and New Mexico Statehood bill. Per-
sons interested can get copy free
by sending request to Senator
Chamberlain.
Senators Gallinger and Murray
Crane are working on Townsend Of
, Michigan, the near-Insurgent, and
hope to add him 10 their ranks. Town
: send is receiving every attention at
the hands of the Tory senators, who
are hard pressed TO maintain the Spe-
, cial Privilege ring rule. Constituents
! of Mr. Townsend viii do well to brace
hi mup.
! The income tax amendment has
] been approved by twenty-eight states
|, and disapproved by eleven. This
! leaves seven states from which TO
: secure the three votes necessary To
r make this amendment a part of the
Constitution. Some of the states
which have acted favorably have fail.
ed TO notify the state department.
Since Senator La Toilette moved
TO abolish the Monetary Commission
the adjustment OF commissions. has
become quite popular. Frank Clark,
of Florida, proposes a Democratic in
vestigation OF all commissions. He
wants TO know particularly about the
Canadian Boundary commission,
which is at present a refuge for those
distinguished lame ducks" Tom
Carter, Jim Tawney, and l.. White
Busbey. former secretary to the
speaker.
In New Jersey. owing to the ac-
tivities OF Governor Woodrow VIII,
son. there is new law providing
that delegations to national conven
tons shall be selected by statewide
primary. This means a La Toilette
delegation from New Jersey In the
next Republican National convention
and a Wilson delegation in the Dem
ocratic National convention.
Sincerely. RATH.