The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-14
EVENING CHAT
= RUTH CAMERON.

We often think we would not like to
nave other people to be able to read our
And yet how many times, if folks only
could see each others minds instead Of
their deeds. their motives instead of their
acts, misunderstanding which embitter
might be whole.
Let me tell you of little resolution
which the man-who-thinks and his wife
adopted not long ago after they We're
married and to which he gives credit in
part, at least for their unusually happy
married life.
them His wife had planned with two old
friends OF theirs outing for a coming
holiday which she had thought he would
greatly enjoy. The opportunity to plan it
had occurred when she could not consult
with him. and feeling sure of his approval
she had ventured to go ahead with the
arrangements. Unfortunately he had
planned an interview with some business
friends for that morning and when he
came home tired and hungry, after an es-
pec1ally trying day and she told him, he
spoke out with sharp disapprOval She,
too, happened to be unusually tired and
nervous, and the result was a quarrel of
which the bitterness and duration was
quite disproportionate to its cause
After the storm had finally blown over,
and the air had become beautifully clear
and sweet, as it always does after thun-
derstorm, they sat down and talked things
over. They reviewed all the little troubles
they had had from the beginning, for this
misunderstanding was the latest and
worst of several similar ones, and they
found that almost all these misunder-
standings were caused simply by one
party doing something entirely without
unkind intent which, for some reason
happened to hurt or annoy the other.
Practically, none of the troubles had a
suspicion of unkind motive behind it,
And the conclusion Of their talk
this resoluticn--'We are going to try to
look at motives as well as deeds. We are
going to try to get the point of view be-
hind words as. well as the words them
selves We promise each other to make
a solemn effort to do this. before we
cuse or blame each other"
1t is to this resolution that the man
who thinks gives much of the credit for
their happy union.
EVEN in love" says Stevenson, there
are unloVely humors ambiguous acts,
objectionable words, may yet have sprung
from a kind sentiment II the injured
one could read your heart you may be
sure that he would understand and par
don: but alasi the heart cannot be shown
it has to be demonstrated in words Do
you think it is hard thing to write
poetry? Why this IS to write poetry Of
a high, if not the highest order
1t is to be sure, more difficult thing
than most of US realize to make our
words and deeds truly portray our hearts.
we don't appreciate this because we
fancy that any misunderstanding which
arises is due to the other partys stupidity
or perversity, instead of to our own fee
bleness at translating ourselves.
But if only those who live IN any close
Intimacy would promise each other to try
to understand, would make some resolu-
tons like that of the man-who-t thinks,
don't YOU believe it would be easier2
do.
OF course, we shouldn't always remem-
Der the resolution, and even when we did
remember and did try to carry it out, /
We shouldn't always be able TO under
stand and even when we did understand. |
We should sometimes find thoughts and
motives that weren't kind unselfsh.
I3lit even so, I'm sure such effort
would help httle-would diminish some
he l.
ings that embitter and hearts that break. !
Aren't you?