Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1911-03-05

taken half hitch around q perpendicular
wall OF sorghum-colored limestone that
looks as though it had been built for that
purpose. while the southwest corner was
not visible at all. being buried under an
adjoining hill to depth of several hun
dred feet, to reveal which would entail
an amount Of excavation to which l dc
not feel equal, and for which l do no,
in this contract. II 1 were hunting seen.
cry and landscape material this entry
would fill my soul with delight. I have
never met more perfect land (es)cape
In all my travels!''
To the Post Office Department comes q
goodly assortment Of letters serious and
otherwise. One incident OF a freak letter
has now grown into series. Several
months ago the department received a
small paper mail bag. such as was
mas greetings. Inside this was in
closed a silver dollar with the informa-
ton, II will call upon the department
next week" When the next week had
passed and the man failed to materialize
a letter was sent him courteously in
curing the whyfor OF the matter Back
came another letter inclosing another
dollar and the information, II will COM
departments" Up to that time it was
thought the money might be intended for
the postal savings bank, but the last let
ter exploded this theory. and so the mail
bag. communications and So are reposing
in the safe in the Office Of the chief clerk.
To the Interior Department come all
kinds Of letters Many Of them concern
patents and copyrights. as people fire.
quently think the Interior Department
has charge of these projections. One such
letter was received first by President Taft.
accompanied by very weighty shoe box.
1t was addressed to His Majesty the
President of the United Sattes,' while on
the letter within the heading ran. your
Royal Highness." AS for the body Of the
letter, II was to the effect that the writer
was poor Italian baker and wanted to
have new pastry he had invented pat
ented.
Down went the letter and package to
the Interior Department. There 1t was
reopened. The new pastry was to all
appearances "a cross between some Turk
ish CONNECTION and half-baked bread" to
use the words Of one who was present at
the time. Nothing could be done but to
send it to the patent office--not, however,
before the package had been made to APP
pear unopened. When it reached its
final destination an official took one look
and then fled. Telephoning up to the Sec
retarys office, he inquired in trembling
voice whether or not they had sent down
an internal machine" Reassured of its
DdrmleSSneSS 10 t0e mere iOOk0T-OT, Cn0
regular course of action in such matters
was begun, but a patent was never is
sued
T.. Dana Durand of the census bureau
is not without his troubles from freak
letters He receives huge numbers of
them along various lines, including not a
few from people who wish to become
naturaliZed, and appeal to him as the
proper authority. One man sent him a
dollar and an advance enumeration blank,
xr-Sti fhn cfofn ant fhnt ho al 70, I,c
enumerated"
But what ranks as his f1rst-place
freak letter was received from a man
In search of a wife. In the letter in which
he made known his desire. he sent q pic
ture of himself, one of his house. which
only wanted "a wife," and picture of
his brewery. The wife he desired was to
be one of the census girls. The epistle
was passed around through the Office, but
failed TO bring the results which the gen.
tleman had expected.
The Conscience fund Of the Treasury
Is constantly increasing, and as the money
comes In so do the letters, at times
pathetic, but at others of an amusing
nature. This fund. which now totals over
$40, 900, Is increased every now and
then by receipts Of from cents up to
thousands Of dollars. In sending an in
closure to the Conscience fund one
writer stated:
Having been in your town about year
or more ago I bought a pair Of rubbers.
IS cents, and at the time was residing In
-. feel to be clean before God must
send you the duty. May God bless you
as He me, Is my prayer. Enclose find 20