The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1911-11-18

Why do people give money away
with strings tied to it:
I will give twenty-five thousand dol
lars to the United Order of Humbugs
to erect an asylum for their children,
IL somebody else will raise two hun
dred thousand, says Mr.. Carnegie or
anybody
Then a committee is appointed and
In which the United Order Of Humbugs
is strong is raked with a fine tooth
comb.
Widows Of decea sed members of the
order with $3.50 in the bank are watt
ed upon by local members Of the COM
mittee and induced to sign a deed Of
trust, or whatever it is, in favor Of
the trustees of the asylum.
Grandchildren of the founders of the
Order are solicited for five percent of
their monthly incomes and retired vet
Grams are assessed on percentage ba-
sis for that part of their pensions
which they are requested to mortgage.
Tag day is instituted and every citi-
zen of the town from the poor devil
who struggles along with only ten
cents in his pocket and despair in his
heart, to the "tight-wad" who walks
down town to save street-car fare, al
though the rheumatism in his feet
nearly kills him, is held up for a con-
tribution to the asylum for the orphan
children of the Ancient and United
Order of Humbugs.
AS finish the committee goes on a
whirlwind campaign and every bust
ness man lettering on the precipice of
bankruptcy is browbeaten into hand
ing over the sole remaining contents
Of his cash drawer, and the committees
announce in large headlines that the
total amount has now been successful
ly bled out of the public and the foun-
dations of the asylum will be put into
place as soon as the funds are collect
ed.
Later, the asylum is reared and upon
it's granite face in letters four feet
high is inscribed the legend
Erected in the year nineteen hun
dred and something or other by An
drew Carnegie and the grace of God"
Or if it isn't Carnegie it's somebody
else
Notwithstanding the $25, 100000 re-
Gently contributed by Mr. Carnegie to
education, Carnegie seems a more or
less solemn fraud.
No man could legitimately accumu.
late the tremendous fortune belonging
to Carnegie.
II he gives it back to "the people,
although who on earth are "the peo-
ple''-its the only thing in common
decency he can do.
He robbed them of it in the Arst
place.
Carnegie's owlish pretentions to vast
erudition and his eternal presence at
the laying of corner stones is nearly
as amusing as Pierpont Morgans as
symptoms of art connoisseurship.
Pierpont Morgan and his ilk are the
blight on the fine bloom of art.
A collector is born not made.
Not in the world is there an enjoy
ment so exquisite as the pursuit of a
collectors fad
To at last after long search. after
ambushing elusive clues. after follow
ing a lure ending in cul de sac, after
chasing a wild hope, to run to cover
your cherished and longed for artistic
'inamorata-this is one of the superla.
tive pleasures known only to the true
collector
The latter is generally trifle shah.
by and frayed round the edges. He'd
rather buy a book than coat. Some
rare objet dart than a pair of shoes
Now step in Pierpont Morgan-or
anybody.
Whoever it is. after robbing and pill
laying and stealing and garnering in
ducats way up in the millions, says
I've about cleaned up the bunch
now I'll become an art collector"
He proceeds forthwith to corner the
art market.
Hal" says he, what's that?"
Why that's a Caxton, says poor old
out at elbows who's been hungerine
for a Caxton all his life
"What-er--is Caxton. strictly
sub rosa, of course. Don't want any
body to know l don't know what they
are"
well. a Caxton" said Out at Elbows
"is-well. Caxton you know-old fel
low-used to print books-and al
that"
! Buy up the lot," says Pierpont, OF
whoever it may be.
So his agent receives instructions tc
hit the head of every Caxton tina,
sticks its head out of cover
And poor old out at elbows, or ever
in at elbows with a moderate income