davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Speaking of Christmas presents; I
got tew cases.-one of beer and another
of n-DEE-gestion. '-Deacon Squash.
A man in Pittsburg. Pa. was caught
With suit case full of dynamite and
whisky Evidently one of those low
proved anarchists who believe in get
ting results Dynamite failing, he was
prepared to resort to Drastic Methods.
An Innovation has been promised
for the Kansas Day blowout. Here
tofore it has been a banquet. but Walt
Payne says it will be dinner this
time. Banquet" in the Topeka
sense of the word, means a sandwich,
a trace of cheese ''fromage" on the
score-card)--a cup Of cold coffee and
q paper napkin.
Dodd Castor admits a growing sus-
picion that the cartoon on his book
looks something like Stubs; Maybe
it does. Cartoonists, like human be-
ings, are liable to form habits.
Every man leaves something to
posterity. 1t may be a mean DISPOSE
ton, or merely a mortgage on the Old
HON estead.
This is the season of the year, and
about the right day of the last week,
for us to advise PhyllisA(or was it
Ermy ?)-that our exchange
editor does not exchange Christmas
presents. (Honestly. the pruneful
paragrapher is hard put when it
comes to putting over something
seasonable.)
A favorite newspaper joke for this
week is the one about the man who
got a box of cabbage cigars from
WHEY. It is a shame to puncture a
time-honored gag, but the fact is,
WHEY always purchases slippers, of
the right size and style, and gets them
dangsight cheaper than hubby could
have purchased them. If it were not
for Christmas and WHEY, man would
sit around in his stocking feet every
night of the year.
Rare fossils have been discovered
in Peru 1t entailed close search to
the job expended the same effort at
home, they would have saved lot of
railroad and steamer fare.
It takes professional reformer
who sees some political advantage in
the price of kerosene while his house
is equipped with gas or electricity.
The visitor who was fined $25 for
his effort to recover $40 from a lady !
friend would harmonic with a spring |
landscape. 1t is a mighty green man
who doesn't know that trying to get /
som ething back from a woman is one |
of the most expensive sports.
We are willing to admit that neither |
Mr.. Metzger nor Mr. Dolley endorsed |
the Sterling Oil stock; and. if either
of the gents feel that Sterling Oil !,
stock has received sufficient free ad- |
vertising, we will gladly permit them |
to cease writing letters of denial to I
the newspapers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

The state fisheries and game COM
mission has decided to abandon artif-
cial Matching of quail after having ex-
pended nearly $4,000 and getting one
quail chicken, which, the comm ission-
ers assert. owes it's existence to the
fostering care OF its feathered mother
and not to an incubator. A large
number Of male and female quail were
obtained at a large expense from west
ern states for the experiment at the
Connecticut Agricultural college.
About 40 birds remain. and these
have been transferred to the hatchery
Mt Windsor Locks. The members Of
the commission are satisfied that the
only way to hatch quail is by the hen.
Winnipeg (Conn.) dispatch to New
4 ork Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28
CHRISTMAS NEckTIEs.

A seasonable question is Where do the
Christmas neckties come from? Are they
kept in storage from year to year? For
each years exhibit is strangely reminis
cent of that of the year beforehand Of
nothing else Or are they specially made
for the two or three weeks trade just
before the holidays? The spectrum
works overtime TO suggest the infinite
variety and dazzling radiance of their
hues. The haberdashers' windows glow,
and men dash by them with face averted,
covered with shame for the display is
libel on their sex, conveying the impress
sion that they are gaudy creatures, de-
lighting to deck themselves out with the
colors of the sunset sky
These are the cravats which would
have inspired the saying. 1t is more
blessed to give than to receive" If 1t
had not been already said. They gladden.
the eyes of women, who think that now
at last they will be enabled to have their
husbands, fathers or brothers look as
noble to others as they do to them. All
that man needs to make the world see
those qualities in him to which it has
been strangely blind is yonder bit of Per
sian sp1endor lighting up the area be
meath his chin. A woman needs an out
let for her emotions in this season of
general giving. Hence these Christmas
neckties.-New York Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

A serious error has been made by
the Holton Signal in an editorial dis
cussion of the increasing state taxes
and the reasons therefor. The reason
for the Increase says the Signal lis
not hard to find It is a game of grab.
Iopeka gets $4,000 for q state fair,
and representatives from the favored
cities get appropriations in exchange
for appropriations for other loeali-
ties The state fair at Topeka has
never received a cent of money from
the state of Kansas. The last $50. 900
which was put into this fair came
from bond issue that was voted will
ingly by the people of Topeka and
Shawnee county. And they feel al
ready that they have received COM
mensurate returns on this money.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

This is an era when honored and
sacred traditions are shattered in a
most outrageous fashion But the
eruelest blow of all in this particular
IS to be found in the announcement
that real chicken is to be served at the
forthcoming Kansas Day club banquet
Mock duck has been the piece de re-
sistence at these banquets ever since
they We're originated. And a Kansas
Day club banquet without mock duck
Will be as delusfon and a snare.
What is mock duck. anyhow
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

fFrom the New York Press.I
The only one who Ioveth a cheerful liar
IS himself.
What makes a girls hair curl so nat
urally is she says it does
It's so easy to have an opinion on any
question that most people have it wrong.
without title or treasure woman can
make out somehow; but without a sweet
temper nohow-
woman can tell you what the baby
is trying to say better than the baby
could if he knew how TO talk.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Topeka is to be a charter member
of the new Western Balloon club
which is to be made up of ballooning
centers west of Indianapolis And to
hold up her end of the game Topeka
must provide facilities for the infla-
ton of balloons. When this is done
it won't be necessary for the two To-
peka owned balloons to begin their
practice flights from Atchison.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Surely no one is surprised at the
political news from Washington to the
effect that considerable jealousy has
broken out in the ranks of the leading
Republican insurgents 1t hasn't
taken much of a student of human ma
ture TO realize that these gentlemen
are so constituted that each of them
wants the role Of leading lady and
have the spotlight all to himself.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

DR.. D. K. Pearson's statement that
he felt like a boy on his ninety-sec-
ond birthday is within the realms of
reason. DR.. Pearson has succeeded in
giving away all of the $1,000 00 of
which he was possessed. "A boy doesn't
feel at all natural unless he's broke.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28
DAFFYDHS
BY y. NoALL.

If the ink dried slowly would the
paper weight2
Click a stamp, mister. That's your
size.)
If duck paddles can a sparrow?
make d getaway boysl Here comes
Pinky. the lady detective.)
IF lard is fat why is gasoline?
Gift him up gently-Handle with
care=I.ay him down tenderly-He
took a dare.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

It is TO smile. No word of protest
comes from any inhabitant of Reno
against the great divorce factory
which is operated there. but the pros
pect of another big prize fight being
pulled off in their midst causes some
of the Renoites to insist it would be an
outrage to public decencv.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Some New York safe burglars hav-
ing set the fashion, it is likely that all
criminals Will ply their trade from
now on with well-sIoved hands. In
so doing. they can give the slip to the
Pudd'nhead Wilson who make identi-
fications from thumb and finger
prints
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

There is going to be some unusual
activity on Kansas avenue during the
next few days if the Western Union
Telegraph company removes its I'M
slightly poles from the east side of the
street by January /, as they have been
ordered to do by the city commission
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

It's to be wondered if the experts
in the weather bureau pat each other
on the back and chortie with glee
when a cold wave arrives according
to their predictions. If they do, they're
the only ones who are at all enthu-
siastic over coincidence.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

They're having a difficult time to
arrange a peaceful program for the
big dinner to promote universal peace
which is to be held in New York sat
urday night and at which President
Taft is to be the principal speaker.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Evidently the beef barons are con
WINGED in their minds that the gov
eminent has sufficient evidence to get
convictions against them. else their
lawyers would not make attempt after
attempt to enter a plea of immunity
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

Out in California. much advertised
for its Remarkable climate, the
weather has been SO cold of late that
it has been necessary to use smudges
in the orange orchards to save the
neNt cron.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

soon apparent. Previous to the removal.
of the clot he failed to recognize friends
and relatives, but now he can recall
incidents previous to the accident.
1t is believed he will recover entirely.
New York American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

When is a man in politics. Colonel
Roosevelt insists that he is not in poll
ties and that nobody expects him to be
in politicc
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF TILE ASSOCIATED .1'RIISs

The State Journal e a member Of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report OF that great news or
ganizatio for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka
The news IS received IN The State jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

He-Do you approve Of dancins2 She
No. why not2. why. it's mere hug
ging set to music We'll. what is there
about that you don't 1u1s71 The music"
Tit Bits
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

The list continued: Mark Twains
Hillcrest edition; Marcus Aurelius and
Epictetus took UP a few more inches
and then Alexander Dumas. Charles
Read. Thackery. Kant, Schopenhauer
and a dozen others, according to the
computation. almost filed the available
shelf room.
Now said the pork packer, whis-
pering into the ear of the salesman,
please put in a few books to read
lChapter TX tomorrow)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28
RY TIE WY
Y HARvEY PARSONS.

Speaking of Christmas presents; I
got tew cases.-one of beer and another
of in-DEE-g estion. Deacon Squash.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1911-12-28

We are willing to admit that neither
Mr.. Metzger nor Mr.. Dolley endorsed
the Sterling Oil stock; and. if either
of the gents feel that Sterling Oil
stock has received sufficient free adj
vertising, we will gladly permit them
to cease writing letters of denial to
the newspapers.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Series OF Meetings.

The Christian Mission Alliance Will
hold series OF meetings in the Court
House, beginning Sunday, February
2Gth. The meeting will last four days,
ending on Wednesday evening follow
ing. Rev. II, A. Forrest. of Atlanta.
Rev. NJ. NJ. Bales. of Chicago. and Mrs.
a. l.. Graham. returned missionary
from Soudan. will conduct the scryc-
cs. Rev. Mr.. Forrest is an accom-
plished singer and will lead in the
music. The time OF the succeeding
services will he announced at thr
first meeting Sunday morning. at If
o'clock
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
LIrE SAVED AT DEATMs DOOR.

81 never felt so near my grave. .
writes w. II. Patterson. of yelling
ton, Tex as when frightful cough
AMI lung trouble pulled me down to
l0r pounds. in spite of Doctors treat
men. sor two years. My father. moth
er ahC wo sisters died of consumption
and th&, | am alive to day is due sole
ly to DR., Kings New Discovery, which
completely cured me-
Now ! weigh ISL pounds and have
been well and strong for years" Quick
safe. sure. its the best remedy on earth
for coughs, colds, lagrippe, asthma,
Group, and all throat and lung trou-
BILE. SOC and $lO0. Trial bottle free.
Guaranteed by Laurens Drug Co. and
Palmetto Drug Co.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Avoid Frauds.

y paint fraud is paint that looks
fair for year or SO. and then makes
repaintng necessary
Don't waste your money and injure
your property.
The l.. & NJ Paint has been in use
for thirty five years.
You make one half of it by adding
u of a gallon of Linseed Oil to each
gallon. 1t then costs about Sl6O per
gallon. and is the best paint that can
be made
Our sales agents are: j. IL. & Nj. L.
Nash. Laurens; j. w. Copeland & Co.
Clinton.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
SOCIAL AND PERSONAL.


Mrs. George F. Young entertained
large number of ladies Friday after
noon In honor of Mr.. George Dudley
Young and bride. who were married
last Wednesday at Gaffney. A num-
ber of young ladies of the city assist
ed Mrs. Young in the receiving line.
600
Saturday Mrs. William L. Boyd gave
dinner party in honor of Mr.. and
Mrs. George Dudley Young.
600
Thursday afternoon, from until
6 o'clock, at her attractive home on
West Main street, Mrs. James Dunk
lin Watts received in honor of her
sisters, Mrs. w. II. Webb, of Nashville,
About seventyfive ladies called dur
ing the afternoon to meet Mrs. Watts
guests.
Miss Ella Brown of Spartanburg,
is in the city visiting Mrs. Nj. L. Cope
land. The following invitations were
issued this week by Mr.. and Mrs. Cope
land:
Mr.. and Mrs. NJ. l.. Copeland
At Home
! Tuesday Evening, Feb. Twentyfrst
At Eight O'clock
Miss Brown
| VO,.;I IuA ;,.
| DR.. w. II. Washington entertained
number of his friends Monday ev-
ening with a stag supper All of those
who attended spent very enjoyable
evening. A very exhaustive discus
sion of the recent train robberies and
feats of the yeggman formed an end
less source of conversation, the main
point of argument bringing on the
advisability of carrying concealed
artillery. After mature consideration,
both before and after the delightful
/ repast which was served, it was con-
cluded by a large majority, the vote
being carried over DR.. Washington S
veto, that ii would be safest to leave
the weapons at home as a strategic
measure to avoid their capture. Those
enjoying the hospitality OF DR.. Wash
| ington We're DR.. W. f. Irby. Nh r.
w. McCuen, Mr.. C.. NJ Miller. Capt.
| y. T. Smythe ,Ir.. Mr.. Berkeley Clardy
DR.. r. +. Hughes. DR.. W. d. Ferguson,
J Lois S,nl>
bert Todd. Esq.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Private kiElcrgnrtcn.

Miss Willie May Chldross who has
been assisting Miss Fannie Thames i'm
Kindergarten work at the Watts Mill
school, has resigned her position and
will open private kindergarten. She
has rented room in the residence
OF Mrs George McCravy and Will op-
EN- the school next Monday. A large
number OF scholars have already been
placed on her list and numbers of 9th
ors are expected
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
"A Correction.

A news item in The Advertiser Of
last week gave the impression that
the Planters Grocery Co., was still do
ing business under that name when
in fact the name planters Grocery
Co" has been discarded altogether
by the purchasers of the stock The
new owners are w. II. Hudgens e Co.
and they will continue with the same
stock and at the same stand under
dat meme.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
RURAL POLICE ACT.
Laurens County Force Increased from
Two to Five Members.

Among the special acts passed by
the general assembly was an amend
ment to the Laurens County rural po-
lice act, adopted year ago. providing
for an increase of the force from two
to five members. Messrs. A. r. Sulli-
van and s. w. Lowe served as rural
police officers last year for this coun-
ty and their work was entirely sat
isfactory. But ii was demonstrated
that two men could not cover the
county in a manner to obtain the best
results, and to that end the act was
amended providing for three addition
al men for this service.
The officers are appointed by the
governor upon the recommendation
of the legislative delegation. The sal
airy Of the policeman is 5000 per an
mum. 1t is understood that a num-
ber of citizens have applied for the
positions.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
"SkON gaard"

=
Skoygaard. the Danish violin vir-
tuOso, proved himself an artist OF such
exceptional pwer that very few OF
today's yiolinists can be compared with
him.
Here is player of not only uncom-
mon and rare ability but one thor
oughly imbued with soulfulness and
poetic feeling.
Skovgaard's style is free from all
affectaion. and possessing magnetic
dience to him.
Nothing could have been more ar
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Herr SkOygaard.

tistic. mature or exalted. than his read
ing of Bcethovem's "Kreut2er Sonata"
With the smaller offerings Skov-
gard exhibited another side of his
wonderful art, unsurpassed in its
suayity beauty and loveliness. What
rich, melting. languishing tones this
wizard draws from his glorious Strad-
ivarius. Neueste Nachrichten. (Mu.
nish, GermanyD
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Stop Scratching

Par-a-sit-i-cidc cures itch and
mango i'll 80 minutes. Pimples
and Ringworms quickly. Price
SOC at
LAURENS DRUG co.
ooc by mail or express from
DR.. l.. j. Sharp & Co., Cou'merce,
Ga. Guaranteed. Take no
substitute"
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Meeting OF Civic Lcngue.

There will be very important meet
ing of the Civic League of Laurcns
next Tuesday Feb. 2Sth., at o'clock.
The meeting will be held in the Office
OF the Chamber of Commerce. All
members who are in arrears are urged
to bring with them the amount due tho
league
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Fnlls Victim TO Thle,e.-

S. w Bends, of Coal City, Ala. has
justiiicablc grievance Two thieves
stole his health for twelve years They
were a liver and kidney trouble. Then
Dr. Kings New Life Pills throttled
them He's well now Unrivaled for
constipation, Malaria. cFIadachc. Dys-
pepsia 25c at Laurons Drug Co. and
Palmetto Drug Go.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
LOCAL AND PERSONAL MENTION.

Sen John II. Wharton was visitor
IN the city Monday
Capt a. II. Thome was in the city
Monday from EXON
Mr.. j. Nj. Davenport, of Waterloo
township. was visitor in the city
Monday.
Col. Robert y. Cunningham OF Water
too spent few days in the city dur
ing the past week
MIR. T.. Il. Mitchell and Mrs. e. f.
Simpson. OF the Mt. Bethel section,
were in the city yesterday
Mrs. w. r. Lucas will give musi-
cal Thursday afternoon complimentary
to several out t-of-town visitors.
Mrs. Louise b. Mays, State Regent,
ID. a. r., will arrive this week to be
the guest of Mrs. w. w. Jones
Mr.. l.. s. Bolt has been drawn as a
Juror lot lne spring term or Federal
Court at Florence next month
Miss Ethel Simmons has accepted
position as teacher in the Coronaco
school and has already taken up her
work
Mr.. and Mrs. ID. G. Ruckman of
Staunton. Va, are in the city visit
ing Mr.. j. \. p. Moore and other rela-
ttves.
Miss Milan, of Droughon Business
College. left today for her home in
Laurens to vst.-Saturday's Daily
Piedmont
Miss LILA S,:,uJell. OF Rockingham.
t.. G.. w.n arrive in the city today to
-e the guest of Misses OlyntAia and
Willie Jones.
Prof Charles f. Broo,;y SIpo"m-
'endcnt OF the Ninety Six Graded
School spent the Weekend in the city.
lie returned to his work Sunday.
L. j
ploycd ut the Palmetto Drug Store
to" several months, left Sunday for
Columbia where he has accepted a
ike position.
Mr.. Geo L. Pitts, DR.. w. III. Wash
ngton and Mr.. Nj. L. Nash have re-
,urned from Charleston. where they
attended the Centennial Celebration
Of the Royal Arch Masons.
Mr. r.. p Minter left yesterday for
The Northern markets to buy his stock
of spring goods. j. E. Minter & Bro.
will add stock Of millinery to their
already extensive line this year.
Mr.. j. O. c.. Fleming is having the
store room recently vacated by Ken
nedy Bros. overhauled and improved
The front of the building was torn
out yesterday and will be replaced
with pressed brick and plate glass
The jury commissioners for Lau-
rens county will next Monday. Feb
ruary 27th. draw ~ grand jurors to
serve this year with the hold-over
members of the body and 26 petit jur-
.ors for the March term of the crimi-
nal court.
Mrs j. H. league Mrs. FL *. Aiken
Mrs j. n. Hudgens, Miss Mary Todd
and Mr. Albert league went to Green
vile Monday night to witness the pre-
sentation of Madame Sherry" at the
Grand Opera House. They returned
Tuesday morning.
DR.. Rolfe IT, GIughes and DR.. lisa
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
No MORE PILES.
Hcm-foid Does It's Work Thoroughly.
No Return

Ii you have piles. YOU know that the
usual treatment with salve8. supposi-
tories or operations can't b. depended
upon for mere than temporary relief.
Outside treatment won't cure the in
side causc-bad circulation in the
lower bowels. DR.. Leonhardt's Hem
Roid tablet remedy internally. re-
moves the cause of piles permanently.
Sold for 81 and fully guaranteed by
Laurens Drug Co. ana druggists every
where. DR. Leonhardt Co, Station B.
Buffalo. y. u, Props. Write for book
let
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
Ginnery Notice.

This Is to notify the patrons of our
ginneries that next Friday. Feb. oath,
will be the last gin day at the Lau-
rens Oil Mill and at Hudgens Ginnery.
Those who desire cotton ginncd must
have it done before that date.
Laurens Oil Mill
Hudgens Gnnery.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22
MIR. B. Il. Terr, Ycr, I'LL.

MIR. Ben f. Terry, substantial
farmer and we'll known citizen of the
county. is critically i'll with pneumo-
mia at his home few miles south west
of the city.
The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1911-02-22

dore Schayer have gone to Raleigh
to attend the annual meeting of the
TriState Medical Association. DR..
Hughes is former president of the
association and at present is a mem
Der OF the executive council.