Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1910-08-12
IOWA AGAINST KISSING.
BY Lue F. Vernon.

ed scientific, backed
crusade against kissing is actually
advancing in Iowa. The State where
the corn grows and husking bees
tempt youth to osculatory indiscre-
tiOnS started the crusade as part OF
its organized fight on the great
white plague. A dozen other State
governments are watching the prog
ress Of the experiment with interest
If Iowa really proves that her cru
sade against kissing stamps out the
white plague, other States may fol-
low suit, the lipless kiss may be pre-
scribed by law. and marriage bu-
reaus will become as deadly dull as
graveyard.
A joke? Not at all The great
State of Iowa has appropriated the
sum of $4,000 per annum as salary to
its professional crusader against the
time-honOred habit of kissing. Sim
gle kisses have at times cost men
who loved not wisely but too well as
much as $1,000, as exhibits in a
breach of promise case, so the same
sum as an annual salary to an expert
might seem a trife low. Still the
measure of the crusaders enthusiasm
must not be taken by his salary.
The crusader is Aretar Edward
Kepford, and his real. official title is
State Government Lecturer on
Health. You will note that he is
not called the State Kiss Extermi-
nator. Perhaps if he was. the ap-
preparation might never have gone
through; for, after all, members of
the Legislature are only human
and. being human, recognize CON-
forting, soul. satisfying kiss. when
they get it.
Crusader Kepford is pledged to
lecture against the white plague.
and to teach Iowans to dodge it.
Now, there are various ways of side
stepping the dreaded disease; Sleep
ing in the open being one of the most
popular prescriptions. But Crusad-
er Kepford believes in drastic meas
ures first, and then perhaps gradu-
al tapering off. And what more
drastic remedy could be suggested
than this crusade against kissing
Why, when Iowa heard about it
everybody gasped.. lowans, en- masse
realized how many people they want
ed to kiss-the neighbor's new baby,
that looks so like its pretty mamma;
the pretty girl whose lips invite
from beneath the shadows Of o
flower laden hat; the dainty cousin
from Illinois who has come to visit a
few weeks; the girl who's bent on
matrimony and the girl who's bent
on Irritation, old friends meeting af-
ter many years and friends you have
just met and made and would like to
know better. Really, what would
courting be in cold words, 'unpunc-
tured by kisses
But o laws o lawn Iowa, at
least-and with thousands of signs
they are giving it q test. at least in
theory.
Crusader Kepford took Ben Frank
Inns advice. "What you want In
your nation introduce in your public
schools.
He has started with the schools.
Two thousand school teachers have
pledged him their earnest support in
stamping out the kissing habit.
And some of them were so kissable.
tool How could he do it, after look
ing the two thousand over?
Kissing. my dear supporters,
he announced, belongs in the stone
ages of courtesy, along with rubbing
foreheads, noses, and chins. There
is no reason why rubbing lips should
be more seasonable or logical. ;"
And we always thought that SCI
entists were human as we'll as wise!
But to return to Iowa and the
edict against kissing. Crusader
Kepford has had printed q number
of artistic signs, hung ON pink and
blue ribbons, reading: Don't kiss
me-" =
These will be hung ON the neck
OF each new born babe, and even the
proudest papa will have to desist.
Ten thousand of these cards have
been printed at the expense of Iowa,
and as race suicide is not fashionable
back there, the printers have let the
type stand for immediate further or
ders. Think of the ten thousand
Iowa babies decked with placards in
stead of rings and bracelets and
enamelled pins
The young people are already
groaning under the burden of State
duty. Young Smith receives in the
same mail with an invitation to a
moonlight skating frolic a notice
from his one-time teacher. backed by
Crusader Kepford: do not expose
the one you love to germs that lurk
in kisses"
The recipient is requested to hang
this over his desk as daily reminder
of the new doctrine aud to memorize
- auaipSf tho oyop;pn IF xo,,r<o <;ov,