davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07
EooIish Ioiterer.

FooItSH DoIterer6.
People who sit and wait for great
moments miss many wonderful small
moments, and they are to be pitied.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07
DOCTOR YOURSEI

DOCTOR YOURSELF
when you feel a cold coming by taxing few doses
Of Perry Darss Pdfnkiher. IL Is better than Quinino
and safer. The large SC bottles are the cheapest.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07

EFFECTS OF LIQUOR REMOVED
IN 81 MINUTES.
Drunkenness is unworthy when you can
have 1t removed without anybody's knowl-
edge. Acme simple home-treatment will
do the work. Write E. Forth. r SIG
Dickey Bldg. Chicago. Ill. for free trial.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07

A good many things are important
II true.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07
HAD NERVE.

He-He has an iron constitution.
She-Yes, and there is a great deal
OF brass about him, too.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1910-05-07

a 8. RICHARDS MEDICINE CO.. Sherman, Texas.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Had Met Before.

young medical student cane
face to face with dear. kind. faith
erly looking gentleman. with white
hair and of highly respectable ap,
pearance.
They both stood transfixed. The
same idea flashed across both OF
them
Your face Is familiar-very famil.
lar; but can't remember where
we have met so often"
However the friendly impulse was
carried out
They shook hands warmly, par
took of friendly glass and depart
ed, still ignorant of each others
name and occupation. But the
young man was determined to solve
the problem, and he seized on a
waiter and said to him:
Tell me. waiter. who is that dis
tinguished stranger with the long
white hair?''
And the waiter whispered slowly:
Please, sir, that's the pawn
broker"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

| Mayor Halliday read his annual
might of May nth. He recommended
| the construction of brick and stone
walks instead of plank walks; the
construction of a sewer outlet through
Ohio levee at Twenty eighth street;
another through the new (Missis
sippD levee. to drain Lake Edwards
into the Mississippi river; the con
struction of a stone walk in front Of
the public library; pavilion in s.
Mary's Park, fountain and a lake
in the park: and other important i'm
provements. AT the same meeting
the council confirmed appointments
AS follows: Corporation counsel
VIM. B. Gilbert city jailer. Michael
Bambrick. assistant chief of the fire
department. Joseph Stegala; street
supervisor, TRADER After; city mar
shall, Patrick Mahoney; policemen,
Thos. A. Fuller, Anthony McTigue
and others; health officer, S. NJ Orr
Regarding the police force, the
mayor said in part: THE conduct
OF the police force during the past
year has been in harmony with the
policy of the administration, and has
received not only the unanimous in
dorsement of the city council, but also
the approval OF good citizens, and also
the compliment of the disapproval
from those who are opposed to the
of the ordinances against
certain offenses, whose peculiar
business and occupations are depend |
ent to large extent upon the pres
ence in the city Of offenders against |
the law. With the support of your
appreciated approval, shall urge |
with renewed energy the continuance |
1f the policy already adotped, OF rid |
ling the city OF bad characters. +"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
AT URBAADALE PARK.
Place Likely TO Become Popular Re.
sort During Present Summer
Two Affairs Scheduled.

Urbandale Park promises to be
Cairos play ground. 1t Is a pretty
spot adjoining the Half Way House
and is easily reached by the interur-
ban railroad at a small fare. The
owners of the property have placed
the park in good condition. The chill
dren from three rooms at the Stafford
school will spend today at this park.
They will enjoy the ride on the cars
and will take their lunches with
them.
June 18th the knights of Columbus
will hold their outing at this park
The entertainment committee for the
knights are Lee Fitzgerald, Isaac La
hue and William Langan. They are
ldevising many novel features of en-
tertalnment for the picnicers. Races
will be run and other sports will be
introduced, swings will be hung az
various points on the grounds. The
committee of arrangements are NJ. r.
Cahill, Harry Stout and Ed j. Stuart.
For the benefit OF those who do not
care to take refreshments, a commit.
tee composed of Thos. Il. OShea, E
Butcher. Lee Fitzgerald and Moses
Haines will see that they are sup
Piled
Those who do not care to spend all
the day at the grounds may go and
come at their pleasure any hour dur.
ing the day.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
PROTEST IS MADE.
TO CONNIE RCiAL AVENUE I'M
PRoVEMENT ORDINANCE IN
COUNTY COURT.
Traction Co. Objects to Paying For
Two Tracks Where II Has But
One--RaiIroads Object
to Tax Levy.

| In the county court yesterday tive
important matters were given atten
ton: the delinquent tax list and the
Commercial avenue Improvement or
dinance, Protests We're filed in each
case, by railroad companies interest
led. In the former case objection was
made in behalf of the Big Four, hi,
| nois Central and G. 4 f, l. railroads
| as foreshadowed in The Bulletin some
| days ago. Their contention is that
the tax levy for county purposes is in
| excess OF the sum permitted by law,
special reference being made to the
% cent tax for the floating debt,
which ould yield this year more
money than is necessary to take up
what remains of the debt of the S25. 900
Originally voted to be paid out Of this
tax. This mater was not finally de-
cided and will be given further con
sideraton tomorrow morning. Attor.
|ney Leek appeared for the C. & f. l..
and Attorney Thomas E. Gillespie for
the Big Four.
In the Commercial avenue matter
Lansden & Lansden appeared to pro-
test in behalf of the Traction Co. and
the Cairo and st. Louis Railway Co.
which were assessed about 500 900 as
their proportion of the cost of the
pavement proposed to be put down.
The ordinance is drawn to cover two
tracks where the company has but
one. and provision requires the com.
pany to lay the second track. The
company is not prepared to this. con.
tending that the business of the city
does not require it at the present.
nor will it do so for some time to
come. The company is not opposed
to the improvement and Is willing to
pay its share of the cost of the pave.
ment for one track, refunding to
property owners the cost of paving
for the second track whenever that
Is laid, which it is permitted TO do at
any time, under its franchise ordi-
nance.
Objection is made also that in or.
der to lay the second track the com
pany must cross the Big Four track
above Twentysixth street, which it
can not do without permission from
the State Board of Railroad and
Warehouse Commissioners.
Attorney Leek contended that the
ordinance was drawn covering two
tracks under verbal agreement
with former General Manager Fischer
Of the railroad company.
Judge Dewey set Wednesday morn
ing for the formal filing of objections
and win pass upon the matter later.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
HIS SACRED HONOR.

Darling he cried. catching hei
In his arms.
Stop she said, struggling to
free herself, You have no right to
treat me in this way You are a
married man
But, listen, sweetheart, / love
you. have loved You ever since the
moment in which FIRST"
Don't! DON'T" she begged, still
struggling TO free herself. You are
wronging your wife--you are wrong,
ing me when you compel me 10 hear
yon say such things. Let me go
please! You are dishonorable. Yoa
Say that | may hope to win your
love aud | will promise to get di-
yoree as soon as l can
TRULY"
Il promise it. upon my sacred
honor 4t
"Well-then | suppose 1t would be
foolish to deprive ourselves OF the
happiness we might have in the
meantime, wouldn't it, t?'~-S.
L. keiser.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Her Stinerb Disdaln.

But there was one young woman in
the box party at the theater who took
no part in the noisy chatter and
giggle,
With her gaze fixed upon the stage
she watched the progress of the play,
Indifferent TO the gayety around her,
except that her delicate, aristocratic,
finely chisled features bore look Of
WEAKNESS. and scronful smile curved
her lips.
Al last, however she turned her
head slowly and looked at the other
members Of the party.
Then she spoke to the elderly ma
iron sitting by her side.
THAT girl in the blue kimona." she
said, thinks she's the whole custard!"
Chicago Tribune
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
THE c0lORED SCHOOLS
Closing Exercises in Various Depart
ments This Week Ending on
Friday at Opera House.

Sunday afternoon the closing ex
ercises of the Sumner high school be
gan. The Baccalaureate sermon was
delivered at 2:90 p. m. in the as
sembly room by Rev. s. A. Sanders.
Yesterday afternoon the Eighth
grade class exercises were held
Fourteen pupils We're promoted to
the high school. Mrs. C. O. Lewis
teacher of the grade had charge OF
the exercises. The assembly room
was crowded to its capacity.
Today the Sophomore class exer
cises take place.
Wednesday evening at 8 O'Clock the
Junior class will hold exercises.
Thursday evening the Senior elias!
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Got His Wish.

Prof. Edgar l., Larkin, the noted
astronomer, was discussing marriage
at dinner in San Francisco. Prof
Larkin believes that it is criminal &c
continue for life marriages that are
unhappy.
why condemn" he said with a
grim laugh, men and women to
such misery as attiiets our mutual
friends, the Blanks? We have all
mutual friends, in the Blanks posi-
ton
AT the height of their usual
quarrel the other day Mrs, Blank
choked back sob and said. re-
proachfully:
81 was reading one of your old
letters today, James. and you said
in 1t that you would rather live in
endless torment with me than in
bliss by yourself
Well. got my wish, Blank
growled"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Not a Salesman.

A house hunter. getting off a train
at a suburban station, said to boy:
My lad, am looking for Mr.. Smith
sons new block of semi-detached cot
tages. How far are they from here?"
About twenty minutes walk" the
boy replied. Twenty minutes" ex-
claimed the house hunter. Non.
sense! The advertisement says five"
We'll" said the boy. you can be
lieve me or you con believe the ad-
vertisement; but amt tryin' to
make no sale"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
A Woman's Great Idea

is how to make herself attractive
But without health 1t Is hard for he
to be lovely in face, form or temper
A weak, sickly woman will be nervous
and irritable. Constipation and Kid.
ney poisons show in pimpies, blotches
skin eruptions and a wretched com.
plexion. But Electric Bitters always
prove a godsend to women who want
health. beauty and friends. They
regulate Stomach, Liver. and Kid,
neys, purify the blood, give strong
nerves, bright eyes, pure breath,
smooth, velvety skin. lovely complex
ion, good health, Try them. soc at all
druggists.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

EXERCISES will take place at s O'Clock
Friday evening at the opera house
the high school commencement exer
clses will occur. The address will be
delivered by Rev. j. "A. Jones, d. d.
ex-president of Wilberforce Uniyer.
sity, and an admission of 20 cents will
be charged to the lower floor and 15c
to the dress circle.
There are six graduates from the
Sumner high school. Douglas j. Amos,
Maggie I. Wall, Edna G. Carr, Alice
Grear, G. Vesta Lewis. salutatorian,
Louise L. Russell. valeiiceors.A
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
The Bulletin 10 on sale at the fol
lowing places:
coIeman's, 7o2 Commercial Avenue
Halliday House News stand.
Blue Front Restaurant.
Msshew News Agency, 221 Eighth
street and IL Sixth street.
MONITOR ON THE MISSISSIPPI.

When the double-turreted monitor
Amphitrite steams up to st. Louis the
people of this section of the big val
ley will review sight which was
familiar to them forty-five years ago
The Amphitrite is now at League
Island navy yard, near Philadelphia,
and thus is several thousand miles
from her destination few days
hence, however, she will steam down
the Delaware, will make her way
along the South Atlantic Coast into
the Gulf Of Mexico, and then will pass
up by way of New Orleans. Then
will come by far the most interesting
part OF her trip. The journey from
New Orleans to St. Louis win attract
the countrrs attention. incidentally
1t will give some impetus to the move
ment for deep water from the lakes to
the gulf.
The Amphitrite will find many i'm
river since Farragut and Gen. Butler
sailed into 1t In 1862 and captured
New Orleans. The sandbars and the
shifting channel troubled Farragut far
more than did the rebel gunboats and
batteries Eads, howver, and the
government engineers have been along
the river since then and have made
sailing up and down the stream a lit.
tie safer and easier that it was half a
century ago But the work which
they did was only a beginning oil
what will have to be done before the
river can be utilized to the extent
which naval as well as commercial
needs demand. Several gunboats and
torpedo boats have been up the river
as far as st. Louis in recent years
yet the trip of the Amphitrite past
Baton Rouge, Vicksburg, Memphis and
Cairo will be followed by the country
with great deal of interest.
But the journey Of the Amphitrite
up the river will have different OBJ
ject from that which carried the little
war vessels here in the past few
years. Their calls were casual and
lasted but few days. The Amphl
trite is to be stationed here and Is
for the use of the Missouri Nava
Militia. st. Louis was something of q
naval center during the civil war
Eads built some OF his ironclads ir
our region. At one time and anothe,
many OF them passed up to and be
yond st. Louis. Those boats would
look crude today, but as they we're i'm
provised craft, as they were INTENDED
to meet an immediate and pressine
need, and as they met that need, the,
performed useful service and mus
be spoken of with respect. The Am
phitrite has something OF war rec
ord She served In the Spanish con
fict Of 1898, but has been thoroughly
modernized, and would be capable o.
rendering good service IL called upor
In 1910. As st. Louis institution
the Amphitrite will have the glat
hand stretched out to her when she
arrives. and as training ship for tn,
naval militia Of this state she will al
good work for the country. Globe
Democrat,
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
They Go Toaether.

Henry" said the young wife, who
had taken up physical culture, how
do you think / am built?"
MY dear, replied her husband
fondly, you are built like a watch
Thank you, Henry And Henry?
"Well?"
Tiff | am built like watch
don't you think | should have a few
jewels
And then Henry frowned and said
the man who compliments woman
is an idiot.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Conducive to Growth.

The keeper was feeding the pyth-
ons Several live rabbits were toss
ed into the cage, and were immedi-
ately and greedily seized by the rep
tiles The struggling rabbits al
though seemingly almost AS large as
the snakes, were swallowed whole,
one after another. The grisly sight
prompted the scholarly looking man
to exclaim
"Gruesome, eh, Keeper
"Yes, and you'd "a grew some, too,
if you'd ct all that live stock,
guess. - Youths Companion.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
In the Waist,

She was examining her new waist
by the aid of the big mirror. Dear
me-" she exclaimed, pettishly, Il
can't see anything pretty in this"
Well. | can" chuekled the young
man who was sitting on the sofa.
Really? And what do you see
pretty in it?"
Why, you"
And then she blushed and said she
thought the waist was just too love-
ly for anything
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
l.nnn Deferred.

Meeker--" Yes, I'm perfectly will
ing for my wife to have the last
word, but"
Bleeker-''Theu what's the trou-
ble?"
Meeker-"The trouble is she hasn't
reached it yet, although we have
been married seventeen years.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Sanitary.

Health Officer-"Do you always
wash your hands when you mix the
dough-"
Baker-"Vor sure yet; you dink |
goes 'rount nit dat dirty -four stick
in on me; you bed | wash mine
hanta."
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Changed His DIAGNOSIS.

Physician-From hasty examina
tion am Of the opinion that you are
suffering from clergynlan's sore
throat.
Patient-The devil you say!
Physician QUICKLY But it Is quite
possible | am wrong--I will look
again
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Guilty!

Goodman was arrested
for beating his wife yesterday"
Squaggs-"H eavens Is it possible?
| always fancied him to be the best
of husbands"
Squiggs-'So he is; but they were
racing automobiles and fR got be-
yond the speed limit and was jerk
ed; he beat her, though"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
An ArtfuI Dodcer.

Eyes" said the candidate, 81 must
admit that when those hoodiums
down at Podunk tried to argue with
me | lodged the issue
why did you do that?' queried
the campaign manager. -
Because" explained the candidate
they tried to argue with eggs"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
CIRCULATION STATEMENT.

Average number complete and
perfect copies OF The Cairo
Bulletin printed daily and Sun
day during the year 1909 .2216
Average number of complete and
perfect copies of The Cairo
Bulletin printed daily and Sun
day during the month of May
1910 ..... .214e
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Overcoming a Difficufty

Finding canal bridge too low 70
allow the passage OF his barge D
German skipper induced 500 Grena.
der Guards from neighboring bar.
racks to step on boadd and act as
ballast, thus lowering the vessel In
the water and passing the bridge In
safety.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Timely Warning.

my friends" said the campaign
orator, beware of the INSCRIPTIONS
briher. (Applause) There are men SO
lost to shame that they will offer
you shilling for your vote. Hiss
ESD DO not listen to them. Spurn
them. Be on your dignity. Demand
more" CONTINUED applause)
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Pig Lived long Without Eond

Missed from farm near Ramsgate.
England, two months ago, a pig, which
had apparently been covered in dur.
Ing the building of haystack. was
found alive in the stack, but very
weak
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
No gentleman should wear a dl

No gentleman should wear a d.
rectoire gown on the street
Porch-climbers are not necessarily
men OF high aspirations.
In general, cooking should be con-
fined to the kitchen, but on special
occasions your husband may be
roasted elsewhere. without serious
results.
A mosquito bite in the hand. Is
better than a dozen on some Other
less convenient portions OF the an.
atomy. (Socrates)
Never cry over split milk, unless
the hired girl split 1t.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
In Mortal Dread.

II fell out of the window of my
fiat yesterday"
And you are on the fourth floor
That was terrible"
Yes; | don't know how to face the
Janitor I'm sure I've violated some
clause in my lease"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Good Reason.

Towne--Why do you call young
Fetherbrane ''Cholly?" His first
name Is Noah.
Browne-Yes, but that's SO map
propriate. Noah had sense enough
to get in out of the rain.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
The Greedy Bard.

when he was poor he was good
poet, but prosperity ruined him."
How was that?"
AS soon as he began getting a
dollar a word, he wouldn't stick to
the meter. Insisted on jamming in
extra words"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
At Columbus.
Teacher Should Rank hIoh.

u education is to do what we hope
lot our children. 1t is imperative that
me best and most gifted men and
women should be attracted into the
ranks Of teachers and that they should
DC regarded as filling one of the most
highiy honored positions In the land
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Correction.

Gee whiZ! here's the rain comm
down again and somebody's stolen
my umbrella"
Somebody's stolen what?"
Wen, the umbrella I've been car.
rying for the last two weeks"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Wisdom.

Criggs--"They say that the hand
that rocks the cradle rules the
world"
Bliggs--"Yes, but the hand that
rocks the boat, gets into the head
lines much more frequently"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

Take three angels, being careful
that they are strictly fresh Remove
the left wings and the harDs Sim
mer gently, and sprinkle with star
dust. Stir in two or three silver
lined clouds, and bake in the sun
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

The Cairo Water Company had
several gangs of men laying pipes in
different parts of town. II was get
tn ready to begin the construction
OF standpipe up town.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

Four measures of five-cent booze.
Two quarts champagne. Three whist
clubs. An ounce Of matrimony, well
palyerized. The best parts Of six
politicians, sprinkle with powdered
responsibility, and serve hot.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
TO BRING STATE CHARGE
Man Who Had Nose Broken Threat
ems Serious Proceedines-Bad
Negroes Fined.

Al Woodland, the carpenter who
punched Errick Parker Sunday night
was fined In Justice Jackson court
$3.50 for the pleasure he enjoyed
parker's nose was broken by the on,
sianght of Woodland and it might dis
figure his face. in that event he will
have a state warrant charging
Woodward with mayhem.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

Send me up two bags of oats and
a bale OF hay
yoice--All right, sir. Who is it
for?
1.-The horse, Of course, you idiot?''
London Globe.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
May Circulation.

The above is a correct statement
of the circulation OF The Cairo Bull
letin for the year 1909 and for the
month of May, 1910.
CLYDE SULLIVAN,
Business Manager.
Subscribed and sworn to before
me this 9Th day of June 1910.
LEO ]. KLEB,
Notary Public.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Raising An Old Are Pension.

Eight years ago Norway began To
put away certain percentage Of the
PROFITS coming to the State from
liquor selling for an old-age PEN
sion fund. This now amounts to ~.
10000.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

What would you do, dear, II /
were to die?" asked Mr. barley,
fondly.
Il don't know replied barley
thouehtfully. (which is your
choice burial or cremation?" -Tit-
Bits.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Following American Customs.

Shoe manufacturers in England.
In advertising their output. to give
the highest commentator to their
goods, make statements like this:
Ours ia the only factory In Great
Britain which specializes on Ameri-
can principals by devoting Its entire
OUTFIT to one quality of boot"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Forced vIrtus

The trouble with soaring man into
being good is that 1t takes so much
time to keep the thrills going
Atchison Globe.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
One Way.

Doctor-Did your husband follow
my directions? Did he take the medi-
cine | left him religiously?
Patients Wife-I'm afraid not, doc
tor; he swore every time | gave him
a dose. Boston Transcript.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
Secure.

Depositor--'Is this bank safer"
Cashier-"Well, | can say that not
a cent ever gets away from the d.
rectors."
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

Sam Winstead, of Paducah. the
young man who thought he was in
the wild and wooley west and shot
off his toy pistol on the street Sun
day night, was up before Justice
Jackson yesterday where he was
fined S25 and costs. A well known
druggist uptown paid his fine and
the young man returned to Padueah.
He is a son of a Well known medi-
cine manufacturer of that city.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

Minnie, if youll be mine
I'll treat you like the courts treat the
Standard Oil CO.
Minnie Indignantly What DO
you mean?"
Jack Fine"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
suckers!

Diuer-'T thought you advertised
that You were serving fish today?'
Waiter--"Well. I'm here for that
purpose; what'll you have?"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07

me bell never rings itself; unless
sOlne one handles or moves II. il i
damn Pixntu6.
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
A Telephone Manonolv.

A Telephone Monopoly.
who Is the party who gets so
angry when you tell her the lines
busy?" said one operator. Il think tia
the same one who never talks for less
than an hour and half when she gets
on the wire"
The Cairo bulletin., 1910-06-07
CAIRO IN 1885,
(caIro Bulletin, published by E. A..
Burnett.)

Mr.. Edward Parsons, of New York,
was in the city on May 9th, visiting
his nephew, Mr., George Parsons.