Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1910-10-23

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corner, nobody would be the wiser.
| 1t was this last part of the program had
in mind as | was sizin' up Jake's travelin'
costume. And, say, how is it up there in the
| opodeldoc zone that they can get these high
water pant legs to fit so much like lengths of
stovepipe? They was kind of a bilious brown
| and cut gen'rous in the seat; but, as far as
| real comic relief went, they wa mt in it with
| the cute little short tailed cutaway that he
| sported above EN-. Honest, that coat was
enough to make an eccentric song and dance
artist green in the eyes! And you can be-
lieve me when say didn't lose any time in
day house patronized by some of our SWEETEST
Texas buyers. My next move is to make
report over the phone.
IYEP, got 'em both under lock and key"
= says [ to Marjorie. Trouble to pick
EN- out? All, it was pipe! Specimens like
that amt so common anyone could get
mixed if they knew what day to look for 'em.
Yes, the nephew's along, all right. His real
name is Jake. Well, Hermes if you insist.
But, say, ask Miss Mildred if she wants him
delivered in the original package, or should
hire some open face clothes for him.
The decision is that Hermes must come in
dress suit, and if he amt got any with him
Marjorie will send down one of Mr.. Roberts
old ones.
ooh, I'm just dying to see him in evening
clothes!" gushes Mildred over the wire. Il
know he'll be perfectly splendid"
"Ma be-" says l. ''Only don't forget the
collar Luttons and studs for the dress shirt"
Sa;-, won't dwell on the gay time l had
tryin to keep that pair out of sight until
after dinner. Honest, if I'd been drivin' the
monkey cage in circus parade I'd felt a lot
better; for every fresh gink that pipes off
that vaudeville costume of Jake's has to
where l steers em up against a twenty-five
cent course dinner all the girl walters got to
gigglin like they'd never seen freak before.
1t wouldn't have been so bad with just
Uncle Jerry, for he's wearin' an old black
whipcord that would pass in the dark, and,
outside the rubber collar and the plated
watch chain looped across his vest he didn't
have the crossroads tag on him very plain;
but Jake might as we'll have had cowbells
tied to him. Maybe | wa some relieved
| too when we got back to the hotel and found
this outfit that the girls had scraped together
and sent down.
| Nov We'll fix you up for the theater and
high society. Jake" says l. by rights you
sheared off; but l don't dare let barber
loose at you, for fear Mildred wouldn't
know you after he got through. She raved
a lot about that hair of yours, Jake"
| You go on now, Srnarty!" says Jaky boy,
GRIMM expansive think I'm goin' to
wear buds like themo"
"You do if you appear out again with
me-" says l. So peel the butternut regalia
and femme see if | can harness you up in
these"
"Hee-haw!" remarks Uncle Jerry. Let
him fix you up real harnsome, Jake"
| Maybe that's what did, but | wouldn't
want to swear to it. Anyway, got him into
the dress shirt by main strength. That was
the first struggle. Then, while Uncle Jerry
held him gaspin' and groanin' on the floor,
buttoned the high collar on and fastened
the white tie. Next we ended him up on his
feet and pulled on the display vest and the
long tailed coat.
"Ug-g-gh! 1t chokes somethin' awful"
says Jake, gettin' purple faced and panicky.
| "Ah, close that pie gangwaS of yours and
breathe natural for a minute!'' says l..
There, you're feelin' better already Come,
pull them knobby wrists back up into your
sleeves This amt no swirnmin lesson, you
know. Say, YOU wear dress suit like it was
SO much tin armor What's the matter with
| xyo,, auyuavo'