davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe. ]
or.1r 70 min hnr Driun IL

Every family has Prize Kin.
Old-fashioned women used to say to
young men: Don't marry a girl who
doesn't know how to blush"
In a country town, people have bust
head on Monday, but in big towns,
people have bust head all the time.
The Square Deal talk is not new; but
it is as difficult as it ever was to get
'em to give it to you.
School teachers pick at members of
the school board as much as people
generally pick at married men.
When a girl quits going to school. it's
up to her to do one of four things
Teach school, get married, learn MILL
merry, or stenog.
nings, but the gam bier who says much
about his losses is either drunk or
crazy.
People don't care to hear a man leo
ture unless he has been rescued from
a balloon at sea, shot lions in Africa,
or done something else very sensa-
tiopal.
Doc Robinson. town drunkard, is not
the meanest man in town. by a long
shot. The meanest and most trouble
some man in town is always sober, IN
order to think up new ways of being
disagreeable.
If you quit work frequently, to work
on the committee for nothing, Wen bet
that the bankers notice 1t: the bankers
loan money, and they watch the ac-
lions of the men very closely.
Some fault is found with the pay as
you enter street cars lately introduced
in many cities, but there is no doubt
that they succeed better than would a
church conducted on that principle.
When a woman looks in the glass,
and realizes she looks old fashioned
and different from other women, she
knows what is the matter: it is her
| hair, and she goes to work on it-does
| 1t a new way, and possibly buys more
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
JAYHAWKER JOTy

"A real sorrow came into the life of
the Lawrence World the other evening
When the frost took the tomato vines.
Noting that Juneau. Alaska, wants its
coal mines opened. Charlie Blakesley
thinks Juneau can be assured of Atchi-
sons sympathy.
1t occurs to the Atchison Champion
that people blame their nerves for a
WhoIe lot that they ought to charge
up to their dispositions.
One charm about the coming of win
Ter remarks the Kansas City Gazette
piano next door through closed win
dows.
Nothing tickles a fat girl more, says
the Osborne Farmer, than to hear of
some other fat girl who weighs three
pounds more than she does and is an
inch shorter.
The Atchison Champion observes that
it's too often the case that the sons
OF mothers who are long on reading
essays before women'S clubs on how to
raise boys, the the oneriest kids in town
A story is going the rounds that when
a Kansas editors railroad passes were
cut off he dropped the timetables from
his paper and prints in their stead this
line: Trains are due when you see the
smoke"
Let US get to our guns and stand
by them. 1t is a crisis" This is the
surfing call to arms issued BY the
Lawrence Journal because of positive
information it has in it's possession
that the saloon interests are actively at
work trying to defeat Governor Stubs
A young and pretty girl was heard
JaWlng her mother the other day by
the Manhattan Mercury, and after re-
latlng the incident, the Mercury added:
NO pretty young girl should jaw her
mother. 1t will make her ugly as sure
as she is born. All the ugly women in
town were once pretty young girls who
jawed their mothers.
1t is always amusing, says the Troy
Chief, to see an amatur editor take
seat way up in front at public speak
ing, pull out a note book and pencil
and pretend to take down" the speech
1t is only a grandstand play and the
people know it, but the amateur thinks
he is impressing them with his repor-
torial ability, although he never prints
a line of the speech.
The village blacksmith Of song and
story is quite different person from
The up-to-date Kansas village black
smith. explains the Winfield Press. IN
stead of plying his trade under the
spreading chestnut tree, the Kansas
blacksmith is un to the minute with
an electric fan by his side. His forge
is blown with an electric motor, his
red hot iron is hammered into shape
with a power hammer, his threads are
made by machinery, he sets tires with
a patent implement, and he grinds his
tools by mechanical process. The only
| thing the old smith has to do is to sit
in rocking chair and operate a cash
register
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Republicans, unless there is an unusual
upheaval against them in the interior
part Of the state. This is not likely.
And SO it may turn out that Mr.. Roose-
welt is quite as good a political prophet
as he is an astute politician, although
much credit for the Republican victory
VIII go to Mr.. Hearst because of his
detection from the Democratic cause
me Democrats nominated Mr.. Hearst
Tor governor one time and could not
win with him. And the DEVELOPMENTS
OF this year seem to indicate that their
chances Of winning are seriously handi-
capped because Mr.. Hearst is not with
them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
QUAKER MEDrTATTONs.

IFrom the Philadelphia Record.l
It is more blessed to give than to
receive-advice.
Every man is just enough of a liar
to keep himself amused.
People should avoid banks If they
are susceptible to drafts.
Trying to keep up appearances is
what keeps man down.
The musician can't complain that
his life is all work and no play.
The increased duty on champagne
spirits.
Never hit a man when he is down.
The same rule should be applied to
beating a carpet.
The beggar who is on the lookout
for the coppers must also be on the
lookout for the cops.
B1obbs-P wonder why Skinnum
ever married. Slobbs-So he could
put his property in his wife's name.
Wight must be very sad for an
opera singer to realize that she has
lost her voice. Wagg-Not half so sad
as when she doesn't realize it
ST am organizing a crusade against
rum" exclaimed the prohibitionist
'Sort of Santa Cruz-ade. Ell % MUIR
INJURED the man with the impression
istic nose.
81 have come to the conclusion that
we all really like to be bossed.' OBJ
served the Wise Guy. 81 suppose that
| is why men have wives, and wives
have cooks" added the Simple Mug.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

[From the Chicago News.l
It takes hardships a long time to sail
out of sight.
When a wise man converses he says
as little as possible.
It's easier for a man to deceive him
self than it is to fool his nelghbors.
One way to demonstrate the uncer-
tainty of a sure thing is to bet on 1t.
And sometimes the wife of self
made man wishes he had used better
raw material.
A woman is foolish to resort to tears
unless she has a lot of confidence in
her complexion.
It's surprising how well the average
man gets along when you consider how
worthless he is
A man seldom has any money. Be
fore he gets married he spends it;
after marriage his wife spends it.
Perhaps it is his sense of humor that
prevents many a man from taking
himself as seriously as he wants other
people to.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

it gives fellow much time for reflec-
ton. 1t was there i met poor old
Tom Cuthbert. He used to talk OF
his girl-his wife whom he had been
until after this little fellow had ar
rived. He told me all abol.S her, and
dreamed they would join him-his
wife and baby. He never was strong
and the shock was too much for him.
He Knew of-well, of you-and of why
1 had left home, and he asked me to
come for his son and-take care OF
him. Tom has no people. you know
His father had been an English army
officer and his mother died when they
were all out in Africa He was
"Baby's name is-Tom." Rosamond
said.
Little Tom" the man echoed.
"And, he looked helplessly at the
infant-twhat shall 1 do with him. y
shall keep him; 1 love him too much
ever to let him go. He-he's all l
have"
"Rosamond," the man cried, as he
drew nearer to her.
The woman was silent.
"Rosamond," he repeated, and, as II
compelled to, she raised her eyes TO
him. 1T have not changed-not one
particle-in my thought of you. Can
you remember what that was? never
said much but-you know Rosamond !
You knew how much I cared ?-how
very much, Rosamond?"
81 knew-then," she said, solwly.
at is the same today" the man re-
peated, "the very same"
And after long silence the woman
said, "And the little fellow?"
"He is ours. We will both keep our
promises to his parents and bring him
up as our own.''-(Copyrighted 1910
by Associated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
JOURNAL ENTRIES

railroad time tables merely show
When trains are scheduled to arrive
and depart.
y d:
PERSONS who have all the necessities
of life these days also have many
luXuries.
The individuals who have every rea-
son IN the world to put on airs gem
orally don't
MOI very many people are satisfied
with the cards dealt out to them in the
game OF life.
= 4
The cobwebs in ones brain are not
made by anything so smart and clever
as spiders.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
HUNOR or THE DIP

'Ioe POI child died fun eatin' too much
'fIOh! Oar amt no SIGH un thing a.
WELL den, dar wasn't enough boy
Puck.
Are you also stranger in town.
asked the recent arrival
Nc; I merely feel TX. Ike one" said the
little dinner at the house to party OF
sufrragettes. Birmingham Age-Heraid.
Mrs. x. away from home)-John. did
you leave out anything for the cat before
Mr. x. (wbo disiikes the beast)-Yes. I
left can of condensed milk on the table,
with the can opener beside it-Boston
Transcript.
"a man recently found nine pearls in
an oyster stew; but the hot milk had
''ghese get-rich-quick schemes never
pan out. Now, if he had found nine oys-
ters he would have had something.''-
Kansas City Journal.
II would be willing to work for you,"
he declared. until my fingers dropped
- haven't any doubt of that" she re-
piled, but what 1 want Is a husband
for me."-Washington Post.
''You mustn't play with Mr. Borurn's
entertaining a caller. to her small
why mustn't II" asked the youngster.
because you might break it." replied
his sister, "and, besides, he will want
1T ahortly."-Democratic Telegram.
LAdy-What do you want, my little
maA?
Little boy carrying cat)-I want that
five dollars you offered as reward for
the return of your canary bird.
LAdy-That's not canary; it's cat.
Little Boy-I know it; but the birds
inssde-Judge.
''Et's mighty tough says the Philoso-
pher of Folly, ito have bunch of fell
lows throw rocks at you, and then to
have the owner of the quarry come ana
get. you pinched for receiving stolen
goods. cleveland Leader.
"svhy are you so vexed, Irma?"
81 am exasperated! 1 attended the
| megting of the Social Equality League,
anc the parlor maid presided and had
the audacity to can me to order three
l times! '-Fliegende Blaetter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
THE LESSON OF LIFE.

life" said a courageous soul, near
ing the end of a beautiful career-"life
resolves itself finally into just what
you can make of yourself. It has
really very little to do with conditions
or events This saying carried the
more weight with those who heard it,
SAYS an essayist in Harper's Weekly,
because it came from one who. de-
spite continual outer thwartings,
spread sunshine and courage incalcu-
liable wherever she came. Not what
she could get out of life, but what she
could put into it, concerned her-and
the measure of what she found to add
to mere living brimmed over.
There is yet another rule of great
value to apply to life when it seems
most difficult. 1t is to give good
measure of all desirable things. and
demand but little. Modest demands
social, financial, dom estic-help to
solve the problem of content. Do you
chance to remember the final para
graph in Tolstois Anna Karenina?
Levin, who records it, had found it
difficult to supply himself with a rea-
son for being; and, after thought.
study, and experience, he gives US this
solution: my inner life has won its
liberty; it will no longer be at the
mercy of events, and every minute of
nv existence will have meaning sure
and profound, which it will be in my
power to impress upon every single
one of my actions-that of being
good" If these words set down here
sound trite and childish, read in con-
nection with the whole great novel
one of the greatest of the last century
they have profound value.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

[From the New York Press.1
A man isn't ashamed to be liar, but
he is to be called one.
To a girl romance is most anything
that's preposterous.
Maybe it will be heaven because
there will be so much less music than
here.
The average woman wouldn't give MP
her long hair for all the political rights
in the world.
You can hunt trouble and find fifty
times as much as you want; happiness
and a hundred times less.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

During the past twelve months no
less than twenty-four aviators have
lost their lives in flights that ended in
disasters. Considering the smallness of
the number of men who are engaged in
attempting to conquer the air, this pro-
portion of fatalities is enormous. Why
don't some Of the anti-football en-
thusiasts begin to shout? DO away
with aviation" But of course not, it
Is in the reputed interest of science.
Anything is permissible in science
name.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

up with two-baggers after two-baggers
and sent earned runs across the plate
as fast as the scorers could mark them
up. This appears to be just what the
Athletics did in one or more innings of
each game in the series.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Some Of the Chicago newspapers in
innate tina: close decisions cut some
thing of a figure in the winning of the
worlds championship series by the
philadelphia team. Maybe so, but
there would not seem to be much room
for close decisions in games where the
members Of a team followed each other
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Those recent forest fires in Montana
and northern Idaho destroyed timber
of the value of $4,000, OOO Such a sum
Of money would have provided for the
adequate control Of the forests destroy
ed and guarded them effectively
against fires for generations of men.
Something along this line in conserv-
ing the forests of the nation, which IS
essentially practicable, ought to be at
tempted before long
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

The limit Of Righteousness appears
to have been reached by the woman
who had three Japanese spaniels act
as bridesmaids when she was mar
RED the other day in New York.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

As President Fairweather of the
Sioux City baseball team says: It will
be black eye to Topeka if she loses
her place in the Western League. And
from the present temper of the fans
and the business men it is not likely
that Topeka will permit one of her OPP
tics to be discolored in such a fashion.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Fresh air is one of those costless
things which are Interestingly expeD-
sive when not used,' says the Chicago
News and it adds: Fortunately the
schools are finding It out" And it
would be well If the schools Of other
towns beside Chicago took this valuable
11s-&
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
FRON OTHER PENS
UNEMPLOYMENT.

The English government employment
bureau, both local and city, or managed
by the board of trade, have in the
year in which they have been in
operation had to do principally with
the unemployed. The chief purpose Of
these public employment agencies has
not been to get men for employers, but
work for those who were without it,
In this task, as the Survey points out
in discussing unemployment, it has
been found that nine-tenths of those
out of work cannot work. The unem-
ployfd are nine-tenths unemployable.
They are i'll. crippled, lost strength, are
too old to work, are widows or deserted
wives. wives with helpless children, 1r
in many instances ignorant where to
get work. In few cases are they hard
drinkers. Sheer physical disability or
the disabling care of children keep
them out of work.
In any case and for all these various
reasons they are unemployable They
cannot give a full days work and no
one is, therefore. willing to give a full
days wage to them and no industrial
establishment is or can be gagged to
half work and half pay.-Philadelphia
Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

There is nothing so strange in the
fact that the Arizona Constitutional
convention has raised its ban against
newspaper men. The latter are now
admitted to report it's deliberations.
How, pray tell, could the delegates to
this convention expect to frame a de-
sirable constitution without a few
pointers from the newspaper men?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Another sample of Jersey Justice:
Under the compulsory education law OF
mosquito land they are insisting on
mothers going to school if they are
within the school age, II years.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Presumably there won't be any such
thing before long as an Oriental quar-
ter in little old New York. The new
police regime has started to clean it
up. And if it is cleaned up it assur-
edIy will cease to be Oriental.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

"If a man die. shall he live AGAIN.
quotes the Syracuse Post-Standard and
It answers: Eyes, If his home was Ia
coma and the census-taker discovered
his tombstone"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Something gigantic and equally ex-
pensive in the way of gates are being
built for the locks on the Panama ca
nal. They will be made up from 10000
tons Of structural steel and will cost
q mere bagatelle of $1,000 900.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

He regards himself as an irreproach-
able example Of immaculate rectitude,''
is a characterization of Colonel Roose-
welt by DR.. Stryker, president OF Ham
hton college. Whatever it is, that must
be something awful. Without attempt
ing to analyze the expression, it is safe
to say that it has all the shorter and
uglier words beaten to a FRAGILE.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

If anybody in Shawnee county is OPP
posed to the proposition of issuing $780,
600 in county bonds for the purposes of
the state fair he is hiding his light I'M
der a bushel
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal Is a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
ganization for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka.
The news is received in The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
bose
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Indian summer appears to have ar
rived. And it is a little more glorious
than usual because the atmosphere is
not hazy and smoky like it generally
is during these delightful periods.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

What fall! Christy Mathewson, one
of the greatest pitchers that baseball
has produced, is about to become pres
ident Of q checker club.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

One merit in the hobble gown has
been discovered by the Council Bluffs
Nonpariel. It says the hobble gown is
at least more sanitary than the train.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

The st. Louis candy bandit" thinks
he would rather be hanged than sent
to prison. There is one disadvantage
to being hanged, however. After it
has. been tried it will be a little bit
too late for him to change his mind.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
KANSAS CONNENT
YOUR MorHER-1N-LAw

We arise to point of personal privi-
lege to bespeak word in defense of
mothers-in-law.
A New York judge by the name of
Harris has seen fit to characterize this
long suffering, much ridiculed and pa
tlent race of social outcasts as a crew
of meddlers who have no rights that
any man is bound to respect.
About two million years ago some
one discovered that there was some
thing very funny about mothers-in-
law, and the jokesmiths have been go
ing to it ever since.
Here is the other side.
1t was this same mothe r-in-law that
suffered in bringing your one best girl
into the world. She watched over her,
and reared her to become the dear,
precious woman you love today. And
when your wife herself went down
into the valley of the shadows, it was
this same very funny mother-in-law
who watched prayerfully and tearfully
by the bedside, and mfnistered the sf-
fairs of your household. She nursed
your kids through their childish ills,
and when she has been a temporary
member of your household she has
been patient servant of the common
good and an inspiration to all of you.
And now, Mr.. Judge, shall we take
you and the jokesmiths seriously, turn
around and kick the old lady with her
bird cages and hat boxes into the
street? AS for US, we'd much rather
kick the judge and the jokesmiths.-
Wichita Beacon.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27
81 j
r4HsZsNv
, NOTES IN A MINOR KEY.
classified.

Social: Mr.. Cerin zumwalt has
been visiting in the Bottoms.
Religious: Rev. Codding has re-
turned to his charge at Lansing. Kan.
cutting q wide swath in the Sixth dis
trict.
Humorous:Among those who are en-
g1neering the recall movement, are
Hon. Rickenbacker and Hon Eaton.
Famine note: Since the advent of
Topeka's wet and law-defying mayor,
it has been impractical to serve keE
beer. A key of beer is an unhandy
article to hide in a bootleg or stoae-
pipe hole.
A recent dispatch from Naples,
Italy, states that the residents of that
city, while enjoying an epidemic of
cholera, were visited by three tor
nadoes,a cloudburst, an eruption of Mt.
Vesuvius and a tidal wave. The dis
patch furnished no further informa-
ton, and left 1t to be inferred that
outside of these few things, Naples is
all right.
The Balance Wheel" an alleged
"boozeorgan," calls Stubs a shorter
and-uglier and a slanderer, but Mr..
Stubbs remains serene. It takes
something stronger than that to
startle him.
Hon. Charles Holidays change of
heart may be due to cold feet, sort
of creeping paralysis.
Vote for the state fair bonds. If
you are a poor man, the difference in
your taxes will not cost you the price
of cigar. If you are rich, it will not
cost you as much as you can save on
one suit of clothes by jewing down
your tailor.
LOVELY CHARACTERS. Lesson TX.
COrtez.
When Cortez hit Old Mexico, he left 1t
on the Fritz.
And since that time a half a bone is
only worth two-bits.
He wore a sheet-iron overcoat, two
pistols and an axe,
And introduced tamales. yellow jaun-
dice, prunes and tax.
He robbed the Aztecs, took their
lives likewise their wives and
lands,
Then filled the blooming country up
with railroad section hands.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Some people are awfully fastfdious.
but we have yet to meet one who
would refuse a $40 bill just because
it was dirty.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-27

Now that the Morning Capsule has
retYacted, we may take it for a fact
THAI the meeting was NOT held at
the Elk building.