New-York tribune., 1910-03-06
MAKING MATCHES
american Mothers Sad
Lead in This Business.

.In Soma roo.hers matchmaking is an IN
stinct in others If IS a casual awakehihs
at the psychological moment. mere
still others who have neither instinct hoi
awakanings aud the daughters nave ~
paddle their own little canoes alone. nv
American mother though, taken as d "i'oio'
is far mere successful as matchfiiahe'
and less apparently so than the turopea"
mother' saws a woman who mas hau MI
opportunity to study the MAKING
matches on both continents
Her methods" says this authority az.
less evident than those of the mo'hers oi
any other land but they are far more sure
and result IN fewer unhappy marriages
Everything she does-when the possloie
husband, preceded by reputation loi
wealth and position. has been sighteo-'s
done with finesse that diplomat HliSn'
envy The wiSeSt do not even ten tneh
husbands that campaign is on. out' III
stead. do all in their power to cover every
advance In case A retreat should be neces-
sary for L told you so is not Pheasant 10
hear when congratulations would have been
Forthcoming had the youth not proved 100
wary for the inysibly spread net
THE girl has her own mind on the SUD
tect but clever mother can usually dueil
anv rebellion where her daughter is con-
cerne6 II the son IS the one for whom
| eternal happiness is being arranged. she
! knows better than even 20 hint ar her puf-
/ pose if he does not seem 20 fall In with X
| The mother of a maTriageaoie daughter or
! son has invariably plan OF acton "heH
! she determines that the right time has
| come. If the young man whom she wishes
| to make her daughters husband Is Of her
| own set the procedure IS comparatiVeiy
simple and requiring merely tact: out "heii
ambition enters into the calculations she
must be intelligent above the average Tor
Only with Insight. patience and DerseVer-
ance can she hope 20 win. while her dauSh-
I ter must he coached in such a way tha'
she too. has no suspicious
! Mothers with matchmaking prOclivities
map out their course many years before
tho children enter Societs- and never lose
an opportunity to make friend or some
( other woman with sons From the very
! first dance Of tho debu;an'e she must be
( made A belle. either by her own charms or
/ her mothers wiles. and such success depends
! TO a larger extent on the playmates who
have grown up with her.
The popular girl is harder to marry of
however. than the shy and retiring one, as
this little maid is content with the one
willing to seek her out. Not so the other
she has her own ideas and is likely to be
attracted by the one Of her admirers VINO
seems most Indifferent. though polite, Tor
she Is piqued by his lack Of alteration and
longs to bring him TO her feet. In her de-
sire for his attention she may discourage
other men far more attractive and worthy
of her hand. and unless her mother works
with a will. and does it unobtrusively. not
only will she lose ali her chances with the
others but any that she might have had
with the hard hearted one, as well
a series of entertainments with hut
an occasional invitation to the marked
man is one of the methods used by the
matchmaking mother, and always must
the girl have another man on hand to ap-
pear devoted. Mother also sees that any
girl the marked man has previously Wor-
shipped is pushed into his notice all oc
casions, besides which any girl he is likely
to admire is quoted TO him ad nauseum.
The ways and means by which mother
circumvents the girls with designs upon
the marked man are exactly those she en-
ploys for her sons sake. and when once
fairly started in either campa gn she loses
more sleep and has more worries than
from her own early manPuvres in catch