davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
English Horribly Misspoke"

Homer started In to use all the words
there We're. He couldn't mention milk
without calling IL white" or blood
without calling 1t dark" as If any
body ever saw dark milk or white
blood. He always called a spear
sharp" ship curved" and dawn
rosy" and Helen "white-armed," and
the Greek heroes "fair-haired." Eve
grant the rest, and pronounce 1t
tautological-but did you ever see a
'fair-haired" Greek0
Now, all this repetition was very
we'll for Homer. and for the other
poets, down to the present day bards
who sing of green grass" and blue
sky" and white clouds" and other
perfectly obvious things. But in a
prosaic age when We study Esperanto
to save words, and sign checks in
stead OF trading pumpkins for sofa
pillows, and read little literature ex-
cept box scores and market reports,
We might just as well talk concisely
and write concisely, cutting out all
unnecessary words.
Oh. yes, We may bubble over once
in while and ease the strain by pratt
Ting. Nevertheless, in a good writ
ten or spoken style, nowadays, one
avoids tautology as one shuns the ac-
cent of Pittsburg or the sartorial
styles of Montana.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
HOWELLS AND MANUAL LABOR

Everybody turns up sooner or later
on the terrace of the house of conf
mons, and latterly 1t was my chance
to meet there that veteran of letters,
Mr.. w. ID. Howells. He was talking
of his journey-a slow crossing, but
he had brought some editorial work
along with him. Just enough to be a
pleasure" said. "Ah," replied. is
work ever a pleasure?" NO" struck
In another man at the table, 1t is
always slavery" appealed to Mr..
Howells. Il know what he MEANS"
he said. i've done that kind of work.
When? At the printers CASE
/ remembered then that the famous
novelist had printed books before he
wrote them. But" said /, do you
mean that all manual labor OF that
class is disagreeable?" Il certainly
found II So" he said. The other man
was more emphatic. You may take
II from me, out OF my own experience,
that all the hands in all factories are
simply counting the minutes till the
clang of the bell. Mail.
Ever notice that when a man gets
fat his hair usually gets thin?
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

II will do no harm to muck-rate
tautology q little more. Tautology, as
the reader learned in this instructive
column yesterday. II he didn't know
1t before, Is q squandering OF words;
1t IL repeating unnecessarily, saying
the same thing more than once.
How often We hear the expression,
"a petite little woman" Now, IL you
know three or four words OF French,
you know that petite" means little. y
And SO this expression amounts to
saying that the person In question is
"a little, little woman" or "a small
little woman" French is usually load
ed anyway.
The same error is made in the
phrase, close proximity" For ''prox-
unity" is always CLOSE" In fact, the
writer doesn't know of anything that's
closer than proximity.
Ii is the uniform and invariable
practice of some authors-but wait a
moment. Uniform" and '1nvariable"
mean the same thing. We're always
laundering into tautology that way.
Mrs. Jones accidentally broke her
leg the other day. Well, does anybody
think that Mrs. Jones would break her
leg puTpOSely IL y HdTuly ucCeosdly
to say that the fracture was "acci-
dental
Theodore Roosevelt, doubtless, has
great future ahead of him. or
course, of course! 1t would be queer
future IL it was behind him, wouldn't
it? We'd better leave out the ahead
of him."
In our youth We used to think 1t
funny to hear someone say Shes a
poor widow woman; her husband Is
dead" We didn't know then that this
doleful remark is very Pathological,
but we had some glimmerings of logic,
Just the same.
There was q fatal drowning" in
Jamaica pond the other day. Did you
ever know of drowning that wasn't
fatal? And did you ever know Of yer
dure" that wasn't green" or baby"
that wasn't both wee" and little"
or a "panacea" that wasn't "univer-
SAL" or monopoly" that wasn't
complete" or prospects" that were
not future" or a 'fallacy" that
wasn't "specious?"
The poets have been great sinners
in this respect. Old Homer started
1t. In Homers time they had plenty
OF time and plenty Of words. and
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
AN UNUSUAL GIFT.

All articles pawned in the National
Monte de Piedad and branches In the
month Of February of this year for
amounts from 25 to 75 cents will be
returned to their owners in Septem-
Der. This will be the contributional
OF the national pawnshop to Mexico's
poor as part of the centennial cele-
bration.
The articles, which are principally
jewelry and clothing, will be returned
TO the ticket holders, who will not
be required to pay either the princi-
pal or interest on the loan. II is evil
dent that only the very poor people
have asked for amounts less than 81,
and II Is these people that IL is desir-
ed to help.-London Spndard.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
The Duty Of Republicans.


To the Editor of The Times: | read
in The Times of the ludicrous at
tempts OF the Republican nominees to
get out from under" Mr.. Owens.
II strikes me that IL Mr.. Owens
was strong enough to be nominated
without the support of the party, sure
ly he should stand we'll with Its united
support.
He is almost certain to make a good
run with the working man, and he
may show up those candidates who
are opposing him as their leader.
Your article quotes Mr.. Shepherd
as follows: 1T will be made clear
to Mr.. Owens within the next two
weeks that not one of the party or
CARNATIONS will recognize him as the
candidate" etc. Mr.. Shepherd Is not
the Republican party in Detroit; in
fact he is only 1.22,0 900 part of it and
that party has just decided that Il
wants Mr.. Owens.
This much Is clear: Mr.. Owens has
fighting blood In his veins and shows
no disposition to listen to the faint
hearted in his party who desire his
withdrawal.
The primary laws were enacted for
the purpose of giving to the people
the right to nominate their own can
didates, and now these men want TO
nullify the peoples choice.
think the best thing that the Re-
publican candidates can do Is to stick
together and vote for Mr.. Owens, for
II they gig back on him 1t will be
every man for himself and that spells
defeat.
ALFRED B. JACKSON,
1900 Twenty-third-st.
Detroit, Sept. 10, 1910.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

OF Sunday school pupils In a skin. II
you fingered they might splash water
on you with their dying struggles and
ruin your raincoat.
whether IL was a crack motorboat. He
said II had been until the crack was
calked.
Then | asked him how many miles
ii made an hour. He just laughed. Il
can't tell" he said. Nobody ever
stays in a motorboat an hour"
Well | says. how long does II
take to pake a nine?
Il DOM remember" he says, but
| think IL is $3.50 feet"
I'm sorry | can't take you riding
in my mot orboat, because IL was en-.
tered in a regatta. II was entered and
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
FEMININE CURIOSITY.

one day while down town she dropped
into his Office.
What are all those books on top
OF the safe?" she asked.
Those are the daybooks, my dear"
he replied.
And where are the nightbooks ?"
she queried.
''Nightbooks?" he echoed in sur
prise.
Yes she rejoined, those you have
to work over at night sometimes when
you are kept here until o'clock In
the morning. Chicago News.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
REPAYS HALFPENNY IN
FIVE YEARS

The sum OF one halfpenny has just
been repaid to the Hull corporation un-
der curious circumstances. Five years
ago an old lady who lives In an out-of-
the-way part OF Yorkshire went TO Hull
and rendered two halfpennies for her
fare on a tramcar. One OF the coins
fell and the conductor refused to take
another. saying he would find the ono
on the floor. When the old lady re-
turned to her country home the miss
ing halfpenny fell out of her umbrella,
and though 1t was five years before
she again visited Hull, her first care
was to call and repay the corporation.
London Express.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
TWO MINUTE VAUDEVILLE
az FRED scHAEFER.

is a
Slap-No, climbs them
Thud-Cant he other side them
Slap-IIe
them and
a he
when lunch?
Slap-Youve all mixed He
steeple
to for he
1t
o O the
o of lin
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

In 1t. But not entirely. II doesn't. for
instance, keep you from sinking in II
ali the money you've got.
There's a good deal OF resemblance
between a motorboat and an automo-
bile. They steer the same way-with
a wheel. And just as often they steer
a different way. And they smell alike
when scorching.
Instead of an extra tire the motor
boat carries a life preserver IL look
just like an extra tire, however, and
you need ii just about as sudden.
When there's something the matter
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
AN ACTRESS TRICK.

Nine. Sarah Bernhard, who is sup
posed to be something of an artist
as we'll as an actress, was recently
called upon in one Of her marvellous
creations to enact the role OF a
sculptor and to model a certain bust
in view of the audience.
This fairly electrified the critics,
but when going into rhapsodies over
the technical skill in handling the clay
which Nine. Bernhard exhibited they
showed that they knew little of the
artistic tricks of actors and actresses;
as a matter of fact, she does nothing
Of the kind. The bust is modelled
and baked, and over il Ia placed damp
clay of the same color. This the
actress merely pulls of leaving the
beautifully modelled head underneath.
Strand.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
EDITORIALS BY THE PEOPLE.
Some Faith In the Rest OF us.

Some Faith In the Rest OF us.
To the Editor OF The Times:-i
have been a subscriber OF The Free
Press for over 40 years and can can
cidly say that after reading their edi-
torials since the defeat OF Senator
Burrows, my only wish Is that there
was a real Democratic paper printed
in Detroit aud | am quite certain
would not have been able TO get 10
the Free Press Offices quick enough
TO have my subscription cancelled.
II seems TO me that the Free Press
is feeling extraordinarily bad. even
such as certain religious fanatics on
the approach of a comet. owing TO the
popular will of the people TO not again
sanction Senator Burrows nomina-
ton. Personally speaking, i am a
friend OF Senator Burrows, yet, can
not see eye to eye with the Free
Press that because of his forced re-
tirement from politics that the at
fairs OF our nation and state are des-
perately endangered.
| think Mr.. Townsend of Jackson.
is a very estimable and capable gen.
tleman and l have no hesitation In
saying that the interests OF this state
in particular and the nation at large,
will have his strict and untiring at
tention as the only outlook OF pub
lic-spirited gentleman who has the in
terests OF the people at heart.
The insurgency movement is
spreading fast and furious, over our
country, today, so much SO that the
states of Maine and Vermont, saying
nothing about Michigan. cannot be
depended upon by the Republican
party. No man can tell the outcome
OF this movement, one trying to adopt
itself to circumstances in attempting
TO hold the balance between Repub-
licanism and Democracy; but come
what may, be the signs good or bad,
most assuredly We can predict that
with the possible election of Mr..
Hemans as governor OF the state OF
Michigan, and VIM. M. Thompson as
mayor of Detroit, and a majority of
certain candidates for the state legis-
lature in this supposed "rock-ribbed
Republican state, the prosperity OF
our state and city will 60 on with
leaps and bounds even in spite of the
rhetoric and mud-throwing of the Free
Press, trying in its own little puny
sinister and nefarious way to please
everybody and pleasing nobody.
/ cannot but repeat that the sooner
we have good, sane. Democratic
paper based on the broad humane
principles of Democracy here In De-
troit the better IL will be for all con
cerned.
ROBT. McKINSTRY.
SIG Bull Block.
Sept. 10, 1910.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
Canned swear.Words VS. Singing.

Another vocal trouble comes from
Hungary. There gramophone dealer
has been so annoyed by the singing Of
the girls in a dressmaker's workshop
that adjoined his room that he filed
one of his instruments with swear
words and set II to work when the
girls were all assembled at their la
bors. The defense that he was only
testing new records" did not have
him from having TO pay damages 70
the amount of a sovereign. He would
have found u ches Dcr 20 buy a parrot!
Westminster Gazette
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

own n motorboat now, call At
my Pretty Maid" because l always
have to ask II where IL is going.
A motorboat is six-cylinder gaso-
line motor with just enough boat
around II to keep you from sinking
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
A Fairy Tale.

Tommy--Tell US fairy tale.
Guest-once a man who had a baby
that didn't cry and a dog that didn't
bite went to live In q suburb without
Quitoes.-Harper's Bazaar.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
a netter aid.

u The Gentlemen, Mr..
Cohen informs me that he has lost
- pocketbook, containing f250, and
~ Offers a reward OF $50 for it's re-
+ q Voice -Tifty-nvs.--London Taller.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
SHY BUT oBsERvANT.

The average mans wife Is a shy
little woman who can see more out
of her sitting.room window than he
can see from the top OF skyscraper.
Galveston News.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
Iere's the Story Of
The Jumping Frog Of
CaIaberas County
Telling How the Owner Of the
4, Frog Trusted u To q Stranger
" and How the Stranger Filled
II With Shot So IL
Couldn't Jump.

Couldn't Jump terriers and chicken-cock and tom
5ou you nothing
match He kched frog day and took him home and said
yard frog jump you you
did him. give little punch behind and the next
summerset maybe couple got good
dewn hatfOoed and all right like He him the matter
kechng flies that he'd nail fly
time could him Smiley said all frog wanted
awhy I've seen
Webster the the sing out Flies Dan1 hiesp and
flop floor agin solid COB Of mud
fall scratching the side of his head with his hind foot a. ID rent
frog modest and Straightforward as he for all he
get over more ground
Jumping dead level his strong suit understand
e had red Smiley monstrous proud frog might
~ fe that had travelled and been evwheres all said he laid
ever any frog that ever they see
M "wen Smiley kept he used to
ish him down town sometimes and lay for bet One day feer-a
Stranger in the aoros him with his box and says
sand Smiley indifferent like 1t might be parrot or
BE Il: s. Iss but sd lsas. 1t ss . s!n. round
this and that and HIM, tbs Well what's he good for
hing should juds-Ss can outump any frog csavsss county
Teller the and took another long particular look
pnts that frog that's btern other frog
S | sS %
you amt only Anyways I've got opinion and
And h sr studied minute and then says kinder sad like
I'm only here and amt frog but had frog I'd
Smiley says all right that's all right you'll hold
box III s1 get s s r :s H.: set os As
set there good while thinking and thinking himself and
oiled him full Of quail pretty
him the floor Smiley went the and Opped the
give him to this Teller says
ready him alongside S1 Of DAM DAM WI with his
the Teller touched the frogs from behind and
shoulders Tnohman oouidnt
planted solid church and he couldn't no more stir than
gu didn't idea what the matter of course
the jerked his thumb his
ssous that frog that's any sstrn any other frog
SMILEY he stood scratching his head and looking down at Dn
rowd of something the matter with him
look mighty som Ad S m1 s.. h.
pounds him upside down. and he blched
and took after the ler but he never
kstched him."
You majority Of Republican voters are
pretty nsurgent
BY insurgency meant everybody knows by this time
spirit of progress that jump
touched from behind" 1t jumped from Cal
Norma o
E4 That isn't exactly accurate either
jumps-from Michigan (y julius y
+ and Michigan
Well, then, 8 the idea.
The politicians eyes nsurgent frog
Some of them including Mr. DENLY had undmated It's
Jumping ability up until about last Wednesday morning.
They any any other frog
NOW however, there scramble between this date and
election for the bandwsgon
people careful
n whose hands they leave their frog.
Smiley what you'd call chump for trusting his frog the
stranger.
And the people will be just big chumps they trust their
public seeking
indicate that they they
nesdsy morning they didn't Insurgency"
These fellows would like hold frog
counted people permit get
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
A CRAZYLOG
BY Fred Schaefer.

exhilarating when you can keep right
on going after running down a bunch
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

The trouble with people who can
only talk on one subject Is that they
always do.
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12
Did you ever hear the story Of the
jumping frog of Calaveras county !
Mark Twain told it to Us original.
" and it was one of his best.
We are going to reproduce it and
then tell you our object in doing so
Here il is:

well, this-yer Smiley had rat
terriers and chicken-cocks, and tom
The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-09-12

Ever notice that when a man gets
fat his hair usually gets thin?
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
A "BARON'Sr ROGUERY.
Advertised. Then Secured Money
From Women; Some He
Married

London.-An amazing story was
told in the Hull police court, when a
teacher of languages named Won
Westerhagen was charged with OBJ
tanning money by false pretenses. e1
Mr.. Dawson. prosecuting solicitor,
referred to some astonishing frauds
alleged against the prisoner. His
method it was stated. was to adver-
tise in Continental papers describing
himself as "a German baron. having
large estates" He obtained money
from women, in some cases marrying
them and living on their money while
1t lasted and then disappearing.
Mr.. Dawson declared that wester-
hagen had posed as a professor of an
English university a doctor of medi-
cine, a teacher of languages and of
music. He had no qualification what
ever for these positions; He was, in
fact, simply German waiter.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
MERCILESS
IN THE EARLY DAYS

Washington. Muck -rakers of
other days" is the title of a speech
to be delivered in the house within
Kahn (Rep., CALI
1T is really surprising" remarked
Kahn. ito what length the literary
muck-rakers went during the early
days of our history. Washington was
attacked time and time again and
mercilessly too.
Because he spent $4,000 upon the
White House, he was roasted to a
turn from one end of the codntry to
the other. And it isn't half finished
either the muck-rakers shouted
while jumping on him for this terrible
extravagance. Roosevelt spent $780,
600 on the White House not so very
long ago and nobody thought it worth
while to throw fits.
Jefferson and Jackson were par
ticularly singled out by the old time
muck-rakers' and their characters as
well as their public acts were un-
mercifully grilled. Even the poet
Tom Moore took a shot or two at
Jefferson.
THE shooting of four soldiers for
desertion in the Creek war brought
down a perfect avalanche of criti-
cism on Jackson's head. The news
papers ran all sorts of pictures of
coffins and gravestones to illustrate
the presidents fiendishness at this
time.
The deeper one goes into the sub
ject the richer the mine becomes. |
could talk all day upon it and still
scarcely scratch the surface"
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
PONIPOUS SENATOR HAS WIND
TAKEN OUT OF HIS SAILS

Washington.-The elevator in the
southeast corner of the Treasury De-
partment building lands its passen-
gers on the top floor, almost directly
in front Of the new offices of Super.
visor Richard Taylor. on the wall
beside the elevator Is a small fire al
arm box.
A day or two ago senator who Is
one of the most pompous of the up
per house and always insistent upon
prompt attention to his demands, es'
pecially from subordinate government
officials, had business with the Su-
pervlsing Architect.
Having completed his mission the
senator stalked majestically toward
the elevator and. pushed the fire al.
arm bell. Immediately two watch
men rushed up, looked around, sniff
ed the air and fir 49, no fire depart
ed. But the elevator did not come.
After minute or two of waiting, the
senator rang the fire alarm again.
Once more it produced two watchmen
on the run, but still no elevator. The
senator pacing impatiently backward
ana lbi Mdlu NdlCllth lhO ii'h
searching in corridors and apparently
looking around aimlessly. After an
other brief period of waiting the now
thoroughly irate senator rang the fire
alarm bell for the third time. Only
one of the watchmen responded this
time, but still the elevator did not
come. Filled with indignation, the
angry legislator marched up to Archi-
tect Taylor and demanded angrily:
Whats the meaning of these Mara
thon races down the corridors which
always end in this corner, and why
in hell is the elevator not running?
| have been ringing the bell for the
last ten minutes"
With a proper air of contrition Tay-
lor promised TO investigate. He rang
the elevator bell and the "lift" ap-
peared Immediately. Explanations
followed, and the senator left the
building with some of his pomposity
temporarily deranged.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
SOCIALISTS TO LEWISTON.
Independent Workers Organize Local
Union in Idaho City.

Lewiston. Idaho.-The Industrial
Workers OF the World will invade
Lewiston. j. j. Mabbott, an organiz-
er OF the order. is here and is circu-
lating a petition with a view OF or
ganiz.ng a local union. He says that
the demand for such an organization
in Lewiston is imperative, and that
as soon as a charter has been obtain
ed street meetings will be held and
prominent speakers of the order will
carry on an active campaign here.
1t is not known what steps will be
taken by the city authorities in case
street meetings are held but it is pro-
bable that inflammatory speeches will
not be permitted.
Chief of Police Masters said that the
street speakers would not be inter-
fered with unless they cause annoy
ance to citizens.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
Baker Students Choose Officers.

Baker City, Ore.-At the close of
school "Wednesday the student body
organization of the high school chose
the following officers for next year:
Victor Basche. president; George
McCord, vice president; Fluvia Hun
stock, secretary treasurer; Leland
Shinn, football manager; Claude
Bronaugh basketball manager;
Charles Langrell, track manager.
The average attendnce is 200 and
out Of this number 151 votes were
cast The Australian ballot system
was used and not an incorrect ballot
was voted. There were large num-
ber of candidates and much good nat
ured rivalry was shown
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1910-04-15
Surveyors Steal Out,

La Grande, Ore.-A crew Of 10 men
left yesterday morning for a point
near Elgin from where they will start
survey across the Blue mountains
for either an electric road or steam
road. That it will likely be a steam
road is attested to by the fact that
most of the men are from the vicin-
ity of Walla Walla and Milton, where
the Hill Road terminates now.
1t Is said that Hill surveying
crew has been at work for three weeks
on the west slope of the mountains
During that time the crew has given
no inkling as to who is furnishing its
funds