Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1910-12-28

muStn Nflilk
"lIeavenS: Are these people as inhu>
man rs all that
'Worse than that. 1t might be ia
tai il YOU were ever seen in the hotel
bar. And. to begin with. you must
refuse all invitations of any sort,
whether to dances. parties. church So
ciab'cs or even Sunday dinners"
"Why Sunday liuncrs?"
because Sundays the only day
you II be invited Dinner on weekdays
is from T. to 1890 and it's strictly a
business matter. no time for guests.
But YOU needn't fret. They won't ask
You till they've sized you up pretty
carefully"
"Oh,"
"Moreovor. you must be very par
ticular about your dress. It must be
absolutely faultless. but very quiet
Clothing sober. dark grays and blacks
and plain, but the very last word as
to cut and fit. And everything must
be in Keeping, the very best of shirts,
collars, ties, hats. socks, shoes, under
wear'- kellogg caught Duncan's
look and laughed. Your launuress
will report on everything, you know
SO you nUSt be improbable"
"l'll be even that, whatever it is"
''i,r very particular about having
your shoes polished. shave daily and
manicure yourself relisiously, but don't
let EN- catch YOU at it,
"Worid they raid me if they did 2"
"Anu then. my son, you must work.
Kellogg paused to let his lesson sink
IN. After a time Duncan observed
p|;i:it;ve:I, Il knew there was a catch
in it somewhere What kind of work 2
1T doesn't make any difference. sc
| long as you get and hold some job il
| the town.
"N'ell. that let's me- out. You'll have
| to sic some other poor devil on this
glittering proposition of yours.
| Couldn't held job in
wait. Ill tell you how to do it il
| just a minute"
Il don't mind listening. but
you'll inch the whole business by
| going to church without a break
! Don't ever fai!-nlorning and evening
| every Sunday. Don't forget that"
| "WhyT'
cts the most important thing OF
| ALL
Does going to church make such q
hit with the young female Jasper-the
Jasperette, as it were?"
| It'll make you more solid than any
thing else with her pepper and nom
mer, and that's very necessary WheI
you're a candidate for their ducats as
we'll as their daughter You must
work and you must go to church,
"i'hat can't be all. Surely you car
think Of something else
! 'ThOSe are the cardinal rules
church and work until you've landed
your heiress. After that you can move
back to civilization. Now. as soon a:
you strike your town you want t<
make arrangements for board and
lodging in some old wonan's house
preferably an old maid. You'll be SURE
to find at least half 4 dozen of EN-
willing to take boarders. but YOU wan
to be equally sure to pick out tn,
one that talks the most. so that shell
tell the neighbors all about you. Don
worry about that, though They al
talk. When you've moved in stool
up your room with about twenty o
the driest looking books in the world
LaWbooks look most imposing Fix "
table with lots of stationery-pen
and pencils. red and black ink. and al
that sort of thing. Make the room loo]
as if you We're the most sincere stu
dent ever. And by no means neglec
to have a we'll worn Bible prominently
in evidence. You can buy one secon,
hand at some bookstore before yo1
start OUT
I'D have to. of course. l thank 70
for the hattery. Proceed with the pre-
gram of the gay. mad life must lea(
I'm going to have a swell time: that
perfectly plain
AS soon us you're shaken down i
your room make the. rounds Of tn
stores and ask for work. Try to &c
into the dry goods emporium if 70
Gun The girls all shop there. But an,
thing will do. except a grocery or
hardware store and places like thai
You mustn't consider any employment