The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-06-05

k ii. u. WELLS is an Lhe
MI man. AS If that was not bur-
" den enough. he has of his own
initiative become a socialist, novelist
a philosopher and scientist. Like an
other of his race. one Chesterton, he has
a vast proclivity for hitting the nail on
the head; but your amateur carpenter not
seldom has learned to hit the nail by
missing it and fetching his own fingers
a painful smack. And that is food for the
reviewers Nevertheless Mr.. Wells is gen
orally most popular, instructive, variously
interesting, and even artistic, his infinite
variety, like a woman's, being his SUI
preme attraction. He can sketch the vul-
gar Britisher with as much fidelity as
Dickens, and he can anticipate scientific
inventions with the unerring and amazing
genius of Jules Verne, no less. His love
of the people bubbles out in a gushing
stream, and his political pessimsm hangs
above that stream like black and chill
ling mist.
This is the man who is accused of ban
tering' the Larkinses. instead of "justi-
flying" theml The Larkinses, be 1t said,
are the family into which Mr. Wells
latest hero, Mr.. Polly, had married. To
quote the reviewer:
After the wedding the bride said:
Amt you goint to kiss me, Elfrid, now
were alone together? Mr.. Polly assumed
an expression of airdity becoming to the
occasion BE careful of my at,
said Mrs. Polly, yielding awkwardly.
This bantering tone is natural to MI.
Wells But 1t is so easy to banter the
Larkinses. It Is so much harder to justify
the Iarkinses, as Dickens did, that one
| would like to see Mr.. Wells 90 II rather
MORE
| Surely that is little hard, little I'M
just. Underneath real banter there is al
ways loving intelligence, but especially
| beneath banter like this. banter that mas
taken note of Mrs. Larkins incredibly
soaked and crumpled and used-up pocket
handkerchief" which on the daughters
wedding day never left her plump red
hand, Mr.. Wells eyes twinkle, but the
| tears are not far Off. -
There is, however. tone too often
taken towards the Larkinses, American
and British. which is easily mistaken for
banter, but is really soothing and bur-
lesque It takes most people long time
to be delivered from their provincialism.
Provincialism is a SNUG sense of the SUI
periority of ones own set. what you
have yourself been always accustomed to,
that alone has your unqualified approval.
The Chinaman with his queue goes down
the street and every urchin finger itches
to tug its silken end, or Ito heave
brick" And why? Because in no decent
land do men wear "pigtails." Behold the
broad and Catholic-hearted scorn In that
descriptive title! And watch the shade
of Noah Webster coming along, attended
| by Mr. Theodore Roosevelt In the flesh,
big stick and all. Queue" do you call
| 1t? How dare you spell it that way? The
American spelling is ''cue!" Thus the
Websterio- Rooseveltian roar, accompanied
with sundry poundings Of the big stick
on the echoing earth.
rhe Larkinses are, of course, excessive
ly uncultured They drop their aitches
and they mop their fattish faces with
rolled-up and perspiring handkerchiefs.
They are without the divine gift of mag
nation, and would be content with very,
very little of this worlds gifts If accom-
panied by appropriate displays OF arec-
ton But seeing them, hearing them,
forthwith the unlSindly provincial SCOTS
and passes on with sardonic self-com-
placency.
of the graduate and the era of the class
orator, It is not inappropriate to say thai
we are never SO unable to banter the
Hardness, never so likely to scott at them
as in the hey-day of our youth. I find
new illustrations daily Of youths gay
habit of generalization and It's sang
froid in classification. When fellow
knows but one city he is nobly equipped
to scorn all others. He who yesterday
barely resisted the temptation TO heave
a brick at chink' or to laugh in the race
Iof a. German using quaint English, Is very,
| 4o1o hat one
standard of truth, of nobility, of propriety-
or course not! Has he not grown up
amonest the best people? Even to imply
ouerv Is to confess oneself Philistine.
| This classification process of young
minds with iss naive intolerance can,
however. avail little towards establish
ling sympathy with the Larkinses. But
most people go on all their lives with no
better equipment for the UNDERSTANDING
of their neighbors. Take Tor example
Mr.. wells himself. Many, no doubt, read
his stories because they are interesting.
Put let IT be known that the author Is an
lavowed socialist and forthwith these
dear readers are Mortified, abasned, re-
pelled. To them the name spells itself In
LETTERS of red, dripping blood at every
angle They coniure up scenes ike tnat
foretold by western populist governor
when for some occult reason, the horses
would have "blood to the brides Or
lthey indicate terrible theories concerning
marriage and the nassng OF children I'M
der state control in series of barracks
while their mothers run around promis-
cuously. Read Wells? Never again! He
Is O horrid SOCIALIST" Thus the provin
cial
In the same way 1t Is understood thatin
certain quarters in China the missionaries
are believed to steal children and make
medicines and charms out of their eyes.
There are veracious persons who have
heard children screaming In the mission
| pound at the dead OF night. What more
proof do you want? These Larkinses, who