The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-15
SOME MISTAKES
 OF A TOURIST

From the Chicago News.
 Gee! But it's good to be home again. said the young man in the English tweeds Didn't you enjoy your trip?" asked the
 man who had taken no vacation.
 I'd have enjoyed it better said the other young man, "if it had been my third trip from now. As it was l pursued pathway that was positively humpy with mistakes. Mistakes may lend an interest to travel abroad, but you know that kind of distraction pals after time. Even
 now I might be slowly freezing in a Swiss glacier If 1t wasn't that I'm positively certain was born to fall out of an aero- plane All other dangers but that I es- capped this summer!
 q met Slater at Swiss hotel and he was alone, like myself, so we joined forces and started out to do a glacier
 Every hotel in Switzerland has a glacier attached to the premises just as hotels
 here have garages. Slater said we didn't need a guide any more than we
 needed roller skates.
 "So we went forth alone and each step we progressed we congratulated ourselves on our cleyerness. It was perfectly sim ple-all we had to do was put one foot before the other. Slater was some dis- tance ahead of me, because I was carry ing a camera and going slowly for fear of | SnDplnR ana ldliinB Oh u. IiCotiitiy WC came to an ice valley, or crevasse, about 30 feet deep and at the bottom ran a l swift little stream bordered on both sides by gravel saw Slater sit down and disappear sliding over the edge. When | came up he waved at me from below and shouted something.
 "Oh yes. I understood perfectly. There weren't any visible footholds cut in the ice so naturally that was the way to get down. I even felt a little offended at Slater for thinking I hadn't sense enough to figure this out for myself. So seated myself on the ice slope and slid down the sharp incline. I had expected to stop at the gravel, but to my horror I found that
 a stout man gains considerable momen- tum in going a few yards. So I slid at
 breakneck pace through the gravel and a little way up on the opposite side into
 more gravel, coming to rest sitting in that little stream of ice water.
 "Satter was not at all gentlemanly
 about it. He coiled himself around a
 block of ice and yelled jubiantly. You
 see, his descent had been purely involun-
 tarv and great surprise to him and that
 was what he was trying to convey to me
 when he shouted I skinned my hands
 worse than he did, too, because he is
 living skeleton and his slide stopped
 when he hit the first gravel
 Then there was the time tried to go
 to the theatre. I. forget the name of the
 town. but the street car conductor and
 couldn't understand each others French
 They ought to send French conductors to
 night school or something. So I got off
 when 1 hit the main street and walked
 along till I saw building that looked as
 though it ought to be the theatre. It had
 lights enough and some kind of sign
 boards out in front. so I saunteerd in.
 The first door I opened let me into a
 meeting of the aldermen of the town, and
 they didn't seem at all glad to see me.
 got out quick for fear they'd have me
 shot at daybreak for a spy. I walked
 along till I saw sign that looked like
 theatre sign. I went in and up two
 flights of stairs and into a hotel office.