Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1910-09-14

more man insisted and upon further refusal
waxed wrathful whereupon the examiner called
the bouncer
An inventor in Highlands, COL. recently OBJ
tanned patent upon an airship that contains all
the comforts of home. In the drawings it re-
sembles enlarged picture of some sort Of
bug, with row Of eyes along the side and
ruf1e down its back; on inspection the rutf1e
solves Itself into the railing along the upper deck
and the eyes into windows OF the various state
rooms the ship.
The lace curtains of each window are care.
fully loOped back as not to obscure the view.
A staircase leads down from the hatchway that
modest women may alight without undue expo
sure Of lingerie. Everything can want in
shown, even to the buffet-that is, all except tho
machinery, which is probably in the cellar of the
craft with the laundry tubs and the furnace
man of Bergen, N j., has patented what
looks like large metallic box turned upside
down. There is no bottom in 1t. In the side
walls are circular openings, and in these are TO-
tary FANS which suck the air into the box. The
aeronaut sits in car suspended from the box
When the Bergen man wants to fly he turns
the power onto his fans; these pump air into the
box. It can only escape downward, and the reac.
ton from this powerful draft will force the box
upward, causing it to hy--so runneth the patent
specification.
An expert Of the patent Office figured out that
blast strong enough to lift the combined weight
or machine and aeronaut would blow hole in
the ground big enough to hide an elephant What
happens to the unfortunate hero who sits below
IN the teeth OF this tornado will probably told
In the supplemental application recently filed.
genius from Clarksville, Tenn, would fly
by 1ncasing himself in rubber suit much like
that Of diver, to which are attached hollow
wings filled with liquid air. The release of tho
air through Waived vents downward and back.
ward propels him upward and forward. There
are no eyeholes in the casing, "but,'' naively
remarks the inventor, "the air pressure from
without will enable the aeronaut to determine his
direction" which is rather vague sort of com.
pass.
From gay Paree comes Edouard Wulff. with a
patented scheme for flying by means of eagles,
vultures or condors." True to the instincts
.: his native city, he fits out his birds with "cor.
SETS, the specifications of which as to trimmings
binding, etc.. are carefully set out
B. Szantmikosy from Budapest, Hungary, also
has patented bird-driven airship, but limits his
motors to ducks; why ducks is not set forth.
or course Chicago has to shy her castor into
the ring She turns up with combination
MISUNDERSTANDING with bay windows and
balconies in the body OF the building, "eminently
adapted for flying through the air or navigating
the water" saith the patent. It has hull.shaped
body, and the vessel can go from air to water
and rom water to ar without disturbing the
poker game In the smoking room.
But woman from Brooklyn goes the Chicago
man one better. II some night the lonely way
farer Is startled by the appearance of huge
nondescript bird that alights in the roadway and
goes steeplechasing cross country with Barney
Oldfeld speed until it reaches nearby lake. over
which it rapidly skims until, landing on the fur
ther shore, it rises into the air again, and disap
pears over the horizon with parting flirt OF it's
tall, let not that wayfarer hasten to the nearest
parsonage and sign the pledge. The bird he has
seen is real for it is only the lady from Brooklyn
taking an after-dinner spin in her newest inven-
ton, ship that can make lightning change