The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1910-08-16
A QUEER
TOURNAMENT
BY ANDREW c. EWING

Miss Ashby. that you men talk to
each other MS You dor Whenever you
and your chun. Mr. Warren are TO-
gether you say all sorts OF mean things
to each other but | don't see that
either Of you gets angry"
| "Oh. we understand each other
81 wonder If Sadie and could do
that"
mo. you couldn't without quarrel
ing"
| Miss Ashby was silent for moment,
then said, I'm going to try"
| IN bet you pound Of candy
against cigar that you quarrel"
an take the bet"
| It was agreed between us that the
two girls should have talking tourna
ment while they played d game Of ten
mis-, Dick Warren to furnish remarks
for Miss BIancharA to be thrown In
occasionally. and Ito do the same for
Miss Ashby. Umpires were appointed
and we all met by appointment at the
! court.
We permitted the girls to play for
awhile without furnishing any re
marks, during which time they said
what they considered very trying
things to each other, laughing all the
While and congratulating themselves
on their ability to maintain good hu-
NOR. After the first set had been play
1 faIr a Cta iraxr hy
girl he was to talk through. began to
put in an occasional word. producing
the following bits Of dialogue:
"You give me another ball like that
said Miss Ashby, land III swipe YOU
with my racket"
Miss Blanchard only smiled.
"Now you're showing your rhinoc
eros tusk." pursued Miss Ashby.
Miss Warren ceased to smile. In
deed. she looked very sober The tooth
referred to was blemish to her beau
| ty. Dick made her retort
"That remark was one of your own
You weren't told to say 1t at all. !
think 1t real mean OF you"
Deuce" cried Miss Ashby at my
suggestion, claiming 10 points more
than she was entitled tor
"You know very well its 3040
What do you want to. grab points Hike
that forr'
"lf you knew" rctorted the other
"what mad looking thing you were
when you said that you'd put youi
head to soak"
| Miss blanchard tried to laugh, bui
was too sensitive to laugh at re
mark which was untrue.
al say, Clara" she said when hel
opponent failed to take a bali sh,
served, III you'd stop looking sweet al
Mr. Martindale you'd play a better
game. Everybody knows what your
up to In that direction"
Dick scored one In putting that re-
mark into Miss Blanchard's mouth
Miss Ashby threw down her racket.
81 don't CARE she said at doesD'i
make any difference whether you wer,
prompted TO say that or not; you had
no right TO say It," Her face was fer,
red. and her eyes were Swapping.
Miss Blanchard had not got over the
remark about her tusk aud seemed to
take a malicious pleasure in saying
what Dick told her to say, sometimes
breaking into short bits of Irritating
laughter.
Sadie. II you don't stop that GIG
Cling you'll drive me crazy" / made
Miss Ashby remark
"oh, don't be silly! You're milking q
poor show of yourself. You should
have brought handgIass"
You'd better have brought one
yourself" retortcd Miss Ashby. III
you had you'd have kept your tust
hidden"
Miss blanchard dropped her racket
and strobe or the field.
Il didp't suppose" she said hotly
that this was to be tournament OF
insults"
Miss Ashby followed her. walking
erect and with great hauteur, II think
you two men had better finish It," she
said.
Done" exclaimed both Dick and |,
and. picking UP the rackets. we began
to play and TO chat. We both haze
physical defects aud did not refraiil
from delicate mention OF them
"Now I'm going to take you In TIN
bald spot on your forehead" from
Dick.
"And I'll knock one Of those spin
die pins from under you. Forty-thlr
ty."
"Thirty.forty. You mean. Pity yotir
first baby lessons were In lying"
"You know very well you've just on,
OF Jail for perjury"
"Now I'm going to put ball between
those bow legs of yours. could throw
a barrel between EN-"
which eye are you looking at me
with--the upper or the lowerf"
Wien we had sent these delicate
compliments for awhile we threw our
arms around each other and kissed
after the European fashion. on both
cheeks This we did to show our so
periorty IN the matter Of good nature
TO the girls. The umpires decided that
! had won the bet, but sentenced me