davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1910-08-21
!

1T
T. va- .r1 p ,rr.p.' a'l Nt~h' 10 rr .
.... rr.t' ha.... ..au .a,.er 49, ~.
.." p. r.' rl''..-,,- - vn- ..'.,.-
n..i ,..u'ni 20 Do '.r "N ..r vIn 60
rra -.", lr... '1'.i ni wiz. 'gl N"'u ...''
rs s''.' '"rr.' o" .yrs~.-'., ~ 7r.. 50
'""I' mi -. . d1Irg woman Ard w.
10 vas '..' 'r- -hrll-'ik" .aro md sk"'o. 80
..''nr - 10 'af'"r,.I rrt." iI,h s"o'r rt''y
'"-.l nlw'b.1g ''a' sk""-"i -. half
50 much ~ 'hc raI" 'ra' hlas.,l T. ", no
loon bellows - h"- "v"s 'r'-'r-d 20
cos. av'.'r..H upon he r,y',a-s 80 y; -
'h.-" Hopr0"I h"vpnd hon"
I'ov ,.'ur'" w.r"n' wasting amy
tr'r". ".'h,r hon.ng r fsaring long
-'...f a"d p. S"tr. ~ -" rrv,r lrirnr
ur..-sr.r = -" vino soon 49,. aT.~'.
- p 90 'N" 90 'r.csI'.r rai'.r = Ilrr.'a
'ar". v.irl o. - got ~" Vr,'cr ard -"
-. -. r.sgposod whin odd,r--v MON grow
-.i ari ol"t-~ rud dreaded >, 200
''.."I ~" Nor. f.r : kr"w that 'h.rr "ro
US e'r. NJ n INST i e smoking r'i'.
r.r-Ir-ln' Ia discrrtun and rnci'lnr
nom ~ and - - mad wrd- and doedS
~. r.r,lsh "vas lighted IN 'ho van no
- "a have -o7rcd tho N - and hrs Wild
i.irr ID 80 ri-t
Wh"r" d,d Won CO. Thin. Cous n"
''alr.f- ~" AZ salty. vc' C,cnrlv. FOR
-Ir"ly ~" . v"- cd hav" kept aroa.
r. N ne "-"cs = you rad hsen %
v"igh''d Whv. the very rn"rna,da vvud
'1"" dragged vou down om ~ Invv-
\ bog l-"v" n rver van was shot AMI
~ ne -lri how r"en NE last ~ spaad 4,
In h"r "r"nnnv wav rnuSin" riair" Rad
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
Miners Have Trouble

David E. Roovas, of this city, who
is general sales agent of the two
mines in the Filth and Ninth districts.
reports that the operators in these
two districts are having lots of trou-
BILE on account of the scarcity of
miners. These sections which are in
the southern Fart of Illinois, signed
up soon after the strike was declared
and have been operating all summer.
AS it is not as easy to mine coal in
these districts as in the northern coal
fields many of the miners have de.
parted for other coal regions where
it is easier to mine and the pay is
better.
The present mild weather favors
greatly mining conditions but should
cold snap set in, Mr. Reeves states
that while no one here would suffer,
there would be an exceeding scarcity
of coal
With regard to the hauling of coal
and the inability of the railroads to
care for the fuel fast enough Just
now, the Chicago Record-Herald of
recent date says in throwing light on
the coal situation which is a vitally
interesting subject in Keokuk as well
as anywhere else just at present and
substantiates Mr.. Reeves report:
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
uNHAPPlNEss DIsPELLED.

Men and Women Unanimous About it.
Many women weep and wall and
refuse to be comforted because their
once magnificent tresses have become
thin and faded Many men incline to
profanity because the flies bite
through the thin thatch on their cram
tums 1t will be good news to the
miserable of both sexes to learn that
Newbro's Herpicide has been placed
on the market. This is the new scalp
germicide and antiseptic that acts by
destroying the germ or microbe that
is the underlying cause of all hair de-
struction. Herpicide is new prep
aration, made after a new formula
on an entirely new principle. Anyone
who has tried it will testify as to its
worth. Try it yourself and be convinc.
ed. Sold by leading druggists. Send
10c in stamps for sample to The
Herpicide Co.. Detroit, Mich.
One dollar bottles guaranteed. For
sale by all druggists.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
AMUSENI ENfTS
Rink Opens We'll.

TIE Rollaway skating rink opened
Friday night with a goocly number OF
skaters present to inangeTate the first
whirl around the fine floor of the sea-
son. Everything has been put in ship
shape condition by Managers Prough
and Reichle and the skating public is
gratified to know that they are going
to conduct q fine place of amusement
this season. Last night the floor was
we'll filled with skaters and success is
attending the first opening nights of
the rink. Manager Pratt has his skate
boys. instructors and all help working
nicely and much pleasure is being de-
rived from the Rollaway.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
$3.50 RECIPE CURES
WEAK MEN-FREE
''nd Name ard Address Today-You
ean Have It Free and be Strong
and Vigorous.

., nave in my possession a prescrip.
WI ,ron lot nervous debility, lack of vigor
Weakened manhood failing memory
c c.u lame back brought on by ex-
~ sees, unnatural drains, or the folh IS
W.! youth, that hs,, cured so many
o rU.n and nervous men right in their
SSS,n without any additional
MI MP or medicine-that think every
n mah who wishes to regain his manly
lr Il and virility quickly and quiet.
d d.. should have copy. So I have
Summed summed to send copy of the pre-.
ora, p.ion Tree of charge, in a plain
w plhuiiiary sealed envelope to any man
mo VIII write me COR it.
OIL ms prescription comes from a nby.
Of ,a na. VINO has made a special study
snrnn eh and am convinced I. is the
ooff'sas ss combination for the cure
rra u a,,t manhood and vigor fail.
T ever put together.
Il eilhk owe 1t to nv fellow man
tbo telio them a copy in conf. ,nce 90
and :, any man anywhere who is veal,
nv, discouraged with repeated fai'pres
IN, s.op drugging himself with harm.
belidpma 'ent medicines, secure what I
five eye is the understanding restora.
rer,a upouilding SPOT-TOJTCHINC
bimsoIly, ever devised, and so cnre
Just ae a. at home quietly and quickly
urop me line like this DIR A.
troit o0,Ilhis ,, 4os1 Luck Building. De.
COW ~ @i .h. and ! will send you a
ordinarr this snlendid recipe in a plain
great !, envelope free OF charge. A
s30o !, many doctors would charge
presc., sa.oO for merely writing out
sntireI1,vr ,n like this--but / send ii
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
CITY NEyI is

The north bound passenger train
No. 10 was So minutes late upon its
arrival in the city The cause for the
delay was not given.
"A DEBATE on high and low tariff
was held at the grammar school Fri
day. the lows winning in the talk
fest. The debate was the first at
tempt of its kino and was very sue
cessful, five debaters being on side
and pitting their mental capacities
against each other.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
CITY NEWS.

The south bound X line passenger
train was ten minutes late upon Its
arrival in the city last night.
The big indoor fair carnival at
the Y. NJ. c. A. this week promises to
attract many people. 1t will start
Monday night at o'clock, and NO
admission will be charged.
George Mills, son-in-law of Ed
ward Fish, of this city, died in Quincy
Saturday afternoon. He was manag'
err Of the Mills Bros bottling works
He was twenty-five years of age, and
was a member of he Elks and Owls.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
Roads Cannot Haul.

Coal operators say there will be no
trouble in furnishing the coal at the
mouth of the pit. In a week or two
they will be In position to work the
mines to their full capacity, but the
railroads will not be able to haul it
to the markets. Most Of the rail
roads We're short on equipment year
ago and the conditions are said to
have grown worse since that time, as
the railroads say they cannot pur-
chase new equipment unless they are
permitted to raise their freight rates.
The Illinois coal mines supply a
large proportion of the coal consum-
ed in the Northwest. This trade
usually is supplied during July and
August. but on account of the strike
the past summer not ton of coal
was shipped to the northwest market
The railroads in the state long ago
exhausted their storage coal and now
are taking the full output of many of
the mines
No shortage of anthracite coal is
anticipated by the dealers. There was
no suspension in the anthracite fields
at the time that most of the bitumin-
GUS mines were closed, and there is
a fair supply of hard coal on hand.
The anthracite coal can be stored for
months or years without depreciation.
while the Illinois produce will de-
teriorate 40 per cent if it is exposed
for three months.
The Greater EVIL.
Franklin: Want of care does more
damage than want Of knowledge.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02

renee, was pushed i'll To MI Tebeau $
SHOES. Inc weakness was shown ar
lAe START anu heokuk unenslye play
was practlcaily lost.
AiL-uusn monmouth showed consid-
cradle knowledge OF the latest style OF
FOOTBALL play their most enectlve galus
were MADE ny heavy line piunses anu
mass pays OH emu. On these pays
heokuk's defense was not aule 10
Withstand the attack and they easily
succumbed. Six times the home team
ploWed through keokuk for touch
downs, and in six attempts to kick
field goals, five were negotiated.
Several times did Keokuk show
some signs of brilliancy and two for
ward passes for good gains represen.
ted the most spectacular offence the
visitors put up. The line nps.
keokuk Monmouth
McGrath :. ....... Hood
center
DiShle ...... ............. Barnes
Right guard.
motifs -. ............ .Frymire
Left Guard
Eiuer $500. ................S Wltzer
Right tackle
He1neman -. ........... Jones
LET. Tackle
Davis ...... White
Right end
Body ...... ...... Runburg
Left end
McManus ................M Mckee
Quarter Back
Meinhardt -. :. .......... Rankin
Left Half Back
hawkes. ........ .......... Stewart
Full back
Referee Mcmillan
Umpire-Marshall.
Timer-Glen Parsons.
Field judge ohnson.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
purple and White Weakened by
disqualification Of Halfback Te-
beau, no Match for oppon-
nents in Opening Game.
BEw1LDERED BY PlAY
Monmouth Made Many substltutions
and Hurled at keokuk a Varied
Attack That Could not
be Repulsed.
Football Results.

TGate City Leased Wire Service.]
AT Monmouth-Monmo So; keo
kuk 0.
At University of Pitts
burg So; Ohio Northern O.
AT Middleton, Conn. Wesleyan 80;
! Stores A. G. College, 0.
At Williamstown, Mass.-Williams
! 20; Union, O.
At Clevelan'!-Western Reserve Is;
Wooster 0.
At Medford, Mass Tufts 0; Rhode
Island State 5.
At Amherst-Amherst O.; Spring.
field Q.
At Columbus, ohio-Ohio State 2,
Wittenburg 0.
At Lafayette. Ind.-Lafayette 10;
Urinus 0.
At Ames, Ia.-Ames 10; Morning.
slde,0.
At Ames, Ia.-Ames 10; Coe 0.
I At Evanston, Ill.-Wesleyan 8,
Northwestern 0.
At Minneapolis Minnesota II; So.
Dakota 0.
At Cincinnati-University of Cincin-
natl 16; Pennsylvania 0.
At Massillon-Cleveland II; Mas.
sillon 6.
At Pittsburg- Carnegie Tech o.;
Waynesburg 0.
At Cambridge-Bowdern o; Harvard
81,
At New Haven-syracuse 6; Yale
i.
At Providence Norwich o; Brown
g.
At Ithaca enselar o; Cornell "a.
At Stevens 0; Princeton
Is.
At Philadelphia-Ge Gettysburg 0; Uni
versity of Penn. 80
At Annapolis St Johns 0; Navy
Is
Massachusetts state 0
Dart mou,li 6.
At Easton-U rsenus o; Lafayette
ie.
At Swarthmore, Pa-Lebanon 0;
Swarthmore AZ.
At Morgantown, w. va.-West
Virginia 6; Westminster 0.
Especial to The Gate City)
MONMOUTH, H., Oct. 1.--Keokuk
High school opened the 1910 football
season at Monmouth today by suffer
ing one of the most crushing defeats
ever dealt purple and white eleven.
The score was 35 to 0.
outweighed and outplayed bewilder-
Cd by the possibilities of new style
iooepall worked to advantage by Mon
mouth. the visitors could at no time
withstand the tremendous assault Of
.neir opponents. A varied attack.
neavy end plays and open forward
passes, were pulled off with lightning
fapidity substitutions were numerous
ana at all times did the we'll drilled
monmouth warriors trap their open
ngs well.
III the start Keokuk was handicap
pea by the loss of their stellar half
oack' who was disqualified, and Mem
uarat strong linesman, but woefully
weak as a back because of no exper-
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
Duncan SCheU Furniture eO.
LACE CURTAINS AND DRAPERES
Largest Selec zion i'm the City-$2OOOO Worth of Choice


This immense collection includes the latest Great
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
Tonight
Church of Modern
Spiritualists
FREE FREE FREE
On Sun. Night, Oct. 2, 1910
Spiritualists and Investigators

Yes, anybody ard everybody, are in
vited to attend at the Modern Wood
man hall, Keokuk, Iowa, 9Th and
Main Streets. Doors open at o'clock.
lecture and Spirit tests 8 O'Clock.
Your departed spirit friends will
speak to you through the Medium, the
Sterling Palmist Seats are free. No
collection taken. Ladies and gentle
men are welcome. You will witness
startling revelations The subject will
be DO the Spirits Return?' If it
rains come just the same. Don't be
afraid, the spirits won't harm you
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02

gains which we are able to offer bv our purchs
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1910-10-02
illinois, the Hive From Which keo-
kuk, Secures Her Fuel Supply,
Having Trouble Just
Now.
NORTH DIDN'T ORDER
Places in Northern Part Of Country
Wait Until the Last Minute to
Get Coal, Causing
Congestion.

Anent the cold weather that is com.
ing in few short weeks to remain
for several months, Keokuk people
are asking the price Of coal, the pros
poets of plentiful supply of both
bituminous and anthracite fuel and
replenishing bins that have been
empty during the warm month of
spring and summer Just a little
crate fire proved cheerful and COM
Portable nowadays and dealers have
to date been able to supply readily
the demand for coal
Soft or bituminous coal goes to the
private residenter at $375 and "a per
ton A raise in price is pending on
the ability of Illinois miners from
whom every bit of Keokuk coal comes,
or their inability to supply the de-
mand which as matter of course
will increase as November and sue
ceeding months drop in.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
LIMERICK CONTEST

Two prizes will be given in this contest each week.
First prizeChoce of school valued so cents from
TuftsLyon Arms company best baseball mtt valued at so
Second prze-Fne pearl penkn with two blades suitable
for either boy girl
Papers for this be addressed Aunt Laurie Herald
Junior, The Herald Los Angeles
Each separate contribution this be signed with
and address and name of school and grade
Il ought learn SWIM" said May;
"Ill go to the beach this nice day,
And I'll paddle around
Keeping close to the ground,
.........,. ...... ..........
Complete this limerick, making the last line rhyme with the
Limercks for this contest
office than Thursday May s.
for publication May IS.
The circus seasons around
And Willes first upon the ground,
For the tents in the air
And the elephants there
......,... ....... .....:....
Complete this limerick making the last line rhyme with the
two the These mercks must be
office than Thursday May r. for publ
cation May o.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
FIRST PRIZE

+ Sweet NAB would be queen of the +
4 May, =
\ She danced so light-hearted and i
i gay, >
i But her songs turned to tears X
= When small Tom with his shears =
\ Cut to shreds all her lacy array. !
J. HELEN M. FERGUSON. i
= 3246 Emmett street5 grade BIO, i
i l.. A. II. s.. age Is. \
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
Herald Juniors Demonstrate Skiuin Rhynli1g Contest
SECOND PRIZE

:. Sweet Nab would be queen of the I
!. May, +
!. She danced so light-hearted and !
\ gay, =
i But her songs turned to tears !
\ When small Tom with his shears :
\ Cut all her garlands away. =
\ BERNICE MAHANEY. \
:. 521 Pine avenue, Long Beach. !
!. Pine avenue school, AS grade. \
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
uIONoRABLE MENTION

+ Sweet Nab would be queen of the +
j. May, \
! She danced so light-hearted and !
J. gay, y
4 But her songs turned to tears \
+ When small Tom with his shears \
+ Remodeled her gown for May day. i
+ ANNA M. PELREN. +
+ 1901 East Thirty third street. 4
!. Vernon avenue school, grade 8. \
i I. !. 4 !. 4. j. i 4 i. T. \ + + j. !. + + i
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01

Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May
She danced lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears.
SO she jumped into the way.
ANDREW MARGRAVE,
Sawtele; 9Th grade.
Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears
Cut up the dress and spoiled the day.
ELSA WINKLER,
G5, Twenty eighth street school; age u.
Sweet Nab would be Queen Of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom, with the shears,
Cut her golden hair all away.
MARY TRAPANI.
Age II; AS, Mckinley avenue school;
4411 Mckinley avenue.
Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears.
Cut all the flowers from her wreath that
day KENNETH HOWELL
sth grade, Montebella public school; R.
F. D. No. 6, box IS, Los Angeles.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01

Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay.
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears
While she was thinking Of May day.
RALPH CLAVELOT.
Sawtelle 9Th grade.
Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced SO lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears.
Did cut her long curls bright day.
AUDREY McCLELLEN.
Sawtelle; 4th grade
Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom. with the shears.
Threatened to cut off her hair that day.
RAY LOOKABAUGH
245 South e street, San Bernardino; 9Th
grade Fourth street school.
Sweet Nab would be Queen of the May.
She danced so lighthearted and gay,
But her songs turned to tears
When small Tom, with the shears,
Cut off her sweet tresses that day.
ANNA EBERLE.
Downey grammar school, Sth grade; Ii
years old.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
tHoNoRABLE MENTToN)

(HONORABLE MENTION)
!. Sweet Nab would be queen of the !
\ May, !
+ She danced so light-hearted and !
u gay,
\ But her songs turned to tears !
+ When small Tom with his shears I
+ Cut off her brown curls while at Z.
+ play. RUTH MERRILL. :
I. 1916 West Forty-ninth street. !
i Grade A9 Polytechnic high school; !
!. age Is.
I / = / / L 4 I ( I / I !. i j
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01
HONORABLE MENTION

HONORABLE MENTION
\ Sweet Nab would be queen of the 4
\ May, \
! She danced so light-hearted and 4
= gay, i
i But her songs turned to tears 4
\ When small Tom with his shears 4
4 Spoiled her dress and also the day. X
! JESSIE CLAUDINO. i.
4 663 West Thirty-sixth place. \
X Jefferson street school, A4. Age 8. 4
Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-01

HONORABLE MENTION }
1. Sweet Nab would be queen of the 4
i May, =
!. She danced so light-hearted and !
i gay, !
i But her songs turned to tears !
4 When small Tom with his shears i
! Ruined the dress she was wearing !
= that day. Yours, >
4 J. HAZEL KELLER. \
\ 4O1 Edgeware road; B9 Olive !
i street high. Age IA. !
!. 4 X i j. X \ 4 4 + + 4 I. 4 X \ J. \ !
The Mena weekly star., 1910-05-05
A NEW USE FOR CATFISH
They Are Utilized in Portland, Oregon to Aid the Sewer Cleaning
 Department.

If the sewer is not broken. it can be cleaned by passing a rope through 1t, to be pulled backward and forward un. til the obstruction is loosened and re. moved. The street officials have a great deal of such work to attend to. and the worry connected with getting the rope through for a long time had them at their wits ends. At last how ever, they discovered quick. surs and easy method.
 The workman goes to the river. catches catfish, ties string to it's tail. and drops it down a manhole into the sewer, when it at once starts for the river, and forces its way through any obstruction not as solid as brick. dragging the string after it. Then the workman goes as far down the sewer as he deems necessary, and picks up the string, which he uses to draw a wire through the sewer, and with this a rope is pulled through, and the sewer is soon cleared.
The Mena weekly star., 1910-05-05
QUEER ITEM ON HOTEL BILL
traveller Charged with Bundle of Hay,
 and Good Reason Assigned for ,9 the Action.

When travelling on foot from Roth. enourg to the Danube Mir Everett Warner had the good fortune to put up at an inn. the Sign of the Lamb. where the charges were so small as 10 surprise bim. He describes in scrlbner's Magazine this unusual ex. perience:
 1t was quite dark when I reached the Lamb. On entering the tavern. which l found crowded to overflow Ing, l sought the Frau Wirtin and made the customary inquiry about the eharge for accommodation.
 Twenty pfennigs," five cents. "is me charge for a single roon," she an swered, to my great astonishment. I barely recovered sufficient natural ef. frontery to inquire if light was includ. ed at that figure It was.
 l will confess that, once irrevocably committed to the room and following the Frau Wirtin's flickering candle up- stars l had some furtive regrets for the haystack, under the open sky. but when l reached my quarters I found that the misgivings due to the alarm. ingly low price were unfounded. I Will not pretend it was a luxurious chamber into which I wag shown, but It was reasonably clean and, to be fair to 1t, many better bed has not yield. ed me half so good a nights rest.
 The next morning, while settling the most insignificant hotel bill that it has ever been my lot to encounter. | could not help thinking that those who pictured the country innkeeper as a fapacious brigand had certainly never put up at the Sign of the Lamb. Per. sonlly, have yet to be charged with bundle of hay, but I understand it las happened.
 How is this, Herr Wirt?" ex. claimed the amazed traveller, going aver the items of food and drink or his bill You have me charged with . bundle of hay"
 Quite right. quite right" responded the landlord, readily. You com. plained last night of the mooing of the COW in the adjoining stable and I gave her a bundle of hay to quiet her. Youths Companion.
The Mena weekly star., 1910-05-05
How Finger Nails Grow.

It has been computed that the aver age growth of the finger nail is 1-32 of an inch per week, or little more than an inch and half per year. The growth, however, depends to a great extent upon the rate of nutrition, and during periods of sickness 1t is retard- ed. It goes on faster in summer than in winter. and differs for different fin gers. being most rapid in the middle finger. and slowest in the thumb. Ac- cording to the rate of growth stated the average time taken for each finger nail to grow its full length is about four and half months. and at this rate man of seventy would have re- newed his nails 1S6 times Taking the length of each nail at half an inch, he would have grown seven feet nine inches of nail on each finger and on all his fingers and thumbs a. aggregate length of 77 feet six inches.
The Mena weekly star., 1910-05-05
Physical Exercise.

Comparing notes on physical exer- else. some one asked Congressman Paul Rowland what he did in that di, fection.
 "Who, me?" he exclaimed with q good deal of warmth. q have little need of any artificial form of exercise I live on the sunset side of the river, you know, in Vest Fifty-seventh street, and my exercise consists in building the fire every morning"
 The answer quite convinced all hands but one. professional skeptic, who wanted to know. you know What sort of fire do you build?" he inquired. Wood or coal?"
 Neither" replied the congressman. We use gas. and I have to scratch a match every time light the fire."-- Philadelphia Record.