Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1910-04-01

your stomach. fast if only for "a
hours. Try it; you may sneer at
this, and laugh at the suggestion,
but you try it and see if you do not
feel much better from your stomach
trouble.
Carrie Nation is coming to the
City" reads heading in the P.-I
of March 90 Anyone knowing the
opinion of those who drink It's the
Water" will understand at once,
that they will not propose taking Sc
attic to Carrie.
There are editors in this State
who, as far as being a credit to the
journalistic profession are disgrace
and would be far more at home, far
as brain-wOrk is concerned, in their
proper sphere. were they doing
chamber-work in livery stable.
A chewometer is the latest device
invented Dy follower of DR.. Fletch-
er, who advises people to eat less and
chew more. 1t is machine which,
when attached to the lower jaw, rings
a bell when the requisite number of
"chews" for each morsel have been
performed.
Long ago it was reported that
John l.. Wilson and "Col." Alden ].
Blethen had become fast friends
again. But recollect report did not
say anything about Brainerd, editor
of the P.-I. and the Colonel" be-
coming friends. 1t is supposed their
different ideas of what constitutes
an editor, will never allow for this.
King Edward. so dispatches say, is
discharging some of the musicians of
F, his band, known as THE King s
Band" in the interest of economy.
The amount of money Edward lost at
the races, yesterday; or the amount
he lost last night playing poker, dis
patches fail to state. King Edward,
practicing economy! He isn't built
that way, thank you.
The fact that the Brodick Castle,
and the Matterhorn, both loaded
with barley, being wrecked, will nc
doubt fill the hearts of prohibition.
lists with joy-the brewers will no,
have the two ships loads of the GER
cal to convert into liquid that intOxi
cates-if one drinks enough of it
| And it is only Germans who main
tain tina: too much is "shust enough. ;
Ed
| Coo of Yelm, met with an acciden
in Los Angeles. There is just thi.
about CO9's visiting the City o
Angels. J." Once before he lost som,
money; later he was hurt by a street
A., car accident. Mr.. Cos wants t,
omit Los Angeles and visit Watts
a suburb of Los. Watts is referred
to by Los Angeles papers and vaude
willie people, as Puyallup is known i,
Washington-a dead, forsaken ham
/ let.
"The Aberdeen boy who stole brace
(; let to present to his teacher will have hi
grief further increased by seeing som
nice looking bachelor man come alOn
and steal the teacher.-P-L
e, This would read more prObabl
, should the word married man be sub
r stituted for bachelor. During thes
!. days of affinities, some married ma
would be great deal more anxiou
to steal the school teacher-as an al
finity - than would o horse-sens
bachelor.
$ The Demosthenes- Cicero Ruthie
q heat-wave of the Washington SIT
urddy Rerie,c, claims to have q clu
I, to the identity of the mysteriou
Lou" of the WASHINGTON STANDARD
Come, Ruthie, why dost thou imag
inc I am "mysterious?' Tell me
do you belong to the Take me ou
to the ball game" set; or the Bibl
, class? Say, Ruthie, aren't yo
somewhat mysterious or is it one Q
I of your admitted short comings?'
When a man worth 10000, 90
goes to the land whence no travcle
returns. by the suicide route, as di'
: Thomas Mclaughlin, brother-in-lav
r of Mrs. Taft, wife of President Taft
: why pour forth abuse and sarcasm
on penniless specimen of lowe
!, five" humanity who goes the sam
road? Perhaps the "lower FIVE
fellow had as good reason to "shufn
off this mortal coil" as did the mem
ber of the upper ten." Who knows
Consumptives. coughing to tn
5 right of you, to the left of you; be
hind you and in front of you, is no
an experience to be envied. It
pathetic, too. The white plague
far more to be dreaded and feare
than the liquor traffic. 1t breaks u
as many happy homes and brings a
much, if not more, DISSOLUTION an
gloom into the hearts of humarit
! than whisky. If you care to invest
9 gate, visit Phoenix, Arizona, or
s Paso. Texas.
{ A new element is springing up i
the old Republican party-men wh
know in their own hearts and brain
n that the elephant" has trOd on tn
n uaOpla 0f thic oO,,p rvy until <bovy NJ