davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
LEG A MASS OF HUMOR

About seven years ago a small
abrasion appeared on my right leg
just above my ankle. 1t irritated me
SO that l began to scratch 1t. and 1t
began to spread until my leg from my
ankle to the knee was one solid scale
like a scab. The irritation was always
worse at night and would not allow
me to sleep. or my wife either. and 1t
was completely undermining our
health. lost nfty pounds in weight
and was almost out OF my mind with
pain and chagrin as no matter where
the irritation came. at work, on the
| would have to scratch it until I had
the blood running down into my shoe.
| simply cannot describe my suffer
Ing during those seven years. The
pain, modification. loss Of sleep. both
to myself and wife is simply inde-
scribable on paper and one has to ex-
perience 1t to know what 1t is.
Il tried all kinds Of doctors and rem
edies but I might as wAl have thrown
my money down a sewer. They would
dry up for little while and fill me
with hope only to break out again just
as bad II not worse. had given up
hope Of ever being cured when l was
induced by my wife to give the Cuti-
cura Remedies a trial. After taking
the Cuucura Remedies for a little
while l began to see a change, and
after taking q dozen bottles OF Cuti-
cura Resolvent in conjunction with
the Cuticura Soap and Cuticura Oint'
ment, the trouble had entirely disap-
peared and my leg was as fine as the
day l was born. Now after lapse Of
six months with no signs Of a recur-
renee l feel perfectly safe in extend
ing to you my heartfelt thanks for the
good the Cuticura Remedies have done
for me. shall always recommend
them to my friends. w. H. White.
312 E. Cabot St.. Philadelphia. Pa. Feb.
1 and APR. 13. 1909"
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
The Eooman In PhiiadeIphia.

A young farmer from Clementon, N.
j.. was selling eggs at the corner Of
Fourth and South streets when a bar.
tender walked up to him and asked
him the price of dozen eggs The
farmer answered: Forty ceats =
dozen," and as there was an extra egg
in the dozen he wanted three cents
extra, but the bartender wanted It
thrown in with the bargain"
Well" said the one who sells the
liquor. Il will take the egg and treat
you to a drink"
"All right" said the farmer. When
they came to the tavern he was asked
what he would drink, to which he re-
piled:
We'll. allus drink sherry with an
egg in it."
And they say farmers buy gold
bricks.-Philadelphi Times.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
Sturdy Militiamen Patroled the
Northern Bank Of Raccoon Greek.

wagon, where one of them sat on his
feet to make sure he did not create
a disturbance. At her own sugges-
ton Jerry dismounted and climbed
into the wagon, where she sat on the
side board, with her head deeply
bowed as though in grief
Pretty picture OF a sorrowing wild
ow. mumbled Collins. Ardmore
punched him in the ribs to make him
stop laughing. To the quick step of
walking horses ahead of them was
now added the whisper and creak OF
leather
Hello. there" yelled Cooke. wish
ing to take the initiative
"Hey-O," answered a voice. and all
was still.
Give up the road; we're taking a
body into Turner's to catch the morn
ing train" called Cooke.
who's dead?"
"One of Ardmores Dutchmen Ship
ping the corpse back TO Germany"
The party ahead OF them paused as
though debating the case.
The north-bound party was a blur
in the road Their horses shifted and
moved restlessly about as their riders
conferred.
Give US the road" shouted Cooke.
We haven't much time to catch our
train.
Who did you say was dead?"
Karl Schmidt" returned Paul
promptly.
Ardmores heart sank, fearful lest
an inspection of the corpse should be
proposed. But at this moment wall,
eerie and heart-breaking, rose and fell
dismally upon the night. 1t was Jer-
ry mourning her dead husband. her
slight figure swaying back and forth
over his body in an abandon of grief.
DE poor yidow-she be nit u.s."
called out big Paul. forsaking his u.s.
ual excellent English for cultural dia-
lect
Who are you fellows?" demanded
Cooke. squirting his horse forward.
The horsemen. to his surprise, seemed
to draw back. and he heard a voice
speak out sharply. followed by a re-
grouping Of the riders at the side of
the road.
I'VE been to a dance at Turner's.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
Another Tradition Exploded.

Two Englishmen were resting at
the Red Horse Inn" at Stratford-on-
Avon. One of them discovered a
print picturing a low tumbling build
ing underneath which was printed:
The House in Which Shakespeare
Was Born" Turning to his friend in
mild surprise he pointed to the print.
His friend exhibited equal surprise, and
called a waiter who assured them OF
the accuracy Of the inscription.
"'Pon my word" said the observ-
ing Englishman, shaking his head
dubiously, Il thought he was born in
a manger!'-Success Magazine.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

derment, resignation and fmpotent
rage. Beside the wagon rode Miss
Jerry Dangerfield. alert and con-
tented Ardmore and Collins were i'm
mediately behind her. and she in
dulged the journalist in some mild
chan from time to time. to his in
finite delight. though considerably to
Ardmores distress OF heart; for,
though no words had passed between
him and Jerry as to the disgraceful
fight OF the adjutant general. yet the
master of Ardsley was in jealous
mood The moon had left the conspir-
ators to the softer radiance OF the
stars but there was sufficient light
for Ardmore to mark the gentle
lines OF Jerry's face, as she lifted it
now and then to scan the bright
globes above.
Paul drove his team at a trot over
the smooth road of the estate TO re-
mote and little-used gate on the south
ern side. but still safely removed from
the South Carolina pickets along the
Raccoon.
Its all right over there" remarked
Collins, jerking his head toward the
creek THE fronting armies are
waiting for morning and battle. sup
pose that when we send word TO Girls
void that Appleweight is in South
Carolina jail it will change the scene
of operations 1t will then be Gov
Osborne's painful task to dance be-
tween .and-order sentiment and
1T
stituents. The possibilities OF this
rumpus grow on me, Ardmore.
There is no rumpus, Mr.. Collins,
said Jerry over her shoulder. The
governor Of North Carolina is merely
giving expression to his civic pride
and virtue"
Leaving Ardsley, they followed
dismal stretch of road until they
reached the highway that connects
Turner's and Kildare.
It's going to be morning pretty
soon. We must get the prisoner into
Turner's by five o'clock. Trot EN- up.
Paul" ordered Cooke.
They were all in capital spirits,
with a fairly good road before them.
leading straight to Turner's. and with
no expectation OF any trouble in land
ing their prisoner safely in jail.
They were well into South Carolina
territory now, and were Jogging on at
sharp trot. when suddenly Cooke
turned back and halted the wagon.
There's something coming-wait,'
Maybe Bill's friends are out look
ing for him." suggested Collins.
Cooke impatiently bade them be
quiet
If we're accosted. what shall We
say?" he asked.
We'll say" replied Jerry instantly,
that one of the laborers at Ardsley
is dead, and that We are taking his re-
mains to his wife's family at Turner S.
| shall be his grief-stricken widow"
The guards already had Apple
weight down on the floor OF the
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
A New Version.

Lawyers have a peculiar system of
abbreviation, such words as trustees,
executors being cut down to trees,
exors, and admors. This practise led
to an amusing slip on the part Of a
solicitor who. somewhat late in life,
abandoned his profession and entered
the church A few Sundays after his
ordination he startled his congrega-
tion while reading the lesson by deliv-
ering one of the passages as follows:
'I see men as trustees walking"
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

and air goin' back home to Kildare"
came the reply.
That seems all right" whispered
Ardmore to Collins.
Thus" muttered Collins, "in the
midst OF death we are in life," and
this, reaching Jerry, caused her TO
bend over the corpse at her feet as
though in a convulsiye spasm of sor-
row, whereupon, to add color to their
story, Paul rumbled of a few consola-
tory sentences in German.
Give us the road" commanded
Cooke, and without further parley
they started ahead, closing about the
wagon to diminish, as far as possible,
the size of the caravan. Paul kept
the horses at walk. as became their
sad errand. and Jerry continued to
weep dolorously.
They passed the horsemen at a
slight rise in the rolling road. The
party bound for Turner's moved stead
lily forward. the horsemen huddled
about the wagon, with Jerry's led
horse between Ardmore and Collins
at the rear. At the top of the knoll
hung the returning dancers, well to
the left OF the road permitting with
due respect the passing OF the funer-
al party. One of them, Ardmore could
have sworn, lifted his hat until the
wagon had passed Then some one
called good night, and. looking back.
Ardmore saw them-a dozen men, he
judged-regain the road and quietly
resume their journey toward Kildare.
Pretty peaceable for fellows
who've been attending Dance sug-
gested Collins. craning his neck to
look after them.
"One fellow lifted his hat as We
passed, and | thought"
We'll. what did you think. Mr.. Ard
more?" demanded Cooke impatiently.
Well. it may seem strange, but l
thought there was something about
that chap that suggested Grissy."
They paused to allow Jerry to re-
sumo her horse, and one of the de-
tectiyes Joined in the conference to
venture his opinion that the men they
had passed were in uniform. They
looked like militia to me-" and as he
was a careful man. Cooke took note
of his remark. though he made no
comment.
But as they moved on toward Tur-
ner's, Ardmore was still troubled over
what had seemed to him the remark
able Partisan courtesy of the return
ing reveler who had lifted his hat as
the corpse passed. Grissy, he kept
saying over and over to himself, was
no fool by any manner of means, and
he was unable to conjecture why the
associate professor of admiralty,
known to be detached on special duty
for the governor of South Carolina.
should be riding to Kildare, unless he
contemplated some coup of impof-
tance
The stars paled under the growing
light of the early summer dawn. Ap-
pleweight. with shoulders YEARLY
dropping, contemplated the attending
cortege with the gaze of one who sui
lenly accepts a condition he does not
in the least understand.
A few early risers saw the strange
company enter and proceed to the
jail; but before half the community
had breakfasted, Bill Appleweight, the
outlaw was securely locked in Jail in
Turner Court House, the seat OF Min
go county, in the state of South Caro-
lima, and the jailer, moreover. was
sharing the distinguished captive's
thraldom
(TO BE CONTINUED
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
Rice marke. Yields s2oo, 900 900.

The worlds market for rice, meas
uring this market merely by the i'm
ports of the principal countries of the
world. amounts to from $3.50 200, ,OOG
to s20O.000.0OO per annum. The i'm
ports of rice into the principal coun-
tries of Europe in the latest available
year amounted to about $50 ,OO0, 900
value: into Asia and Oceanica, $685.
100000: into North and South Amer.
ica, exclusive of the United States,
312. 1000. 900. and into Africa, $4,000. 600
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

saved from fatal Bright's disease by
Doan's Kidney Pills and my health i'm
proved wonderfully"
Remember the name-Doan's. For
sale by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co.. Buffalo. N. Y.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

passed too freely. !
often staggered as II
drunk. l could not
lie in bed over half
An hour. MY side was
numb. sight affected.
and q tingling sensa-
ton covered my
body. 1t actually
seemed as II l would
20 crazy. l was
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
Opinions Aired,

Were the commencement exer-
cises interesting"
Very. The time was divided be-
tween advice from public men on the
selection of career and suggestions
from graduates on how to run the
government"
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
And They Wondered.

Judge Nicholas Longworth, who
used to sit on Ohio's supreme bench.
looked unnaturally grave, and q
neighbor, in recognition Of his facial
depression, named pet owl Judge
Longworth" 1t was the very next
day that an excited maid broke up his
wife's garden party. "Oh. madam"
said she Madam! Judge Longworth
has laid an egg
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
DRIVEN ALMOST CRAZY.
Bakersfield, CAL, Woman's Awful Sus'
ferin0.

Mrs. H. W. Heagy. 1915 L ST.. Ba-
kersfield. Cal. says: Doctors failed
to help me and l was in despair. The
kidney secretions scalded terribly and
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

MY friend" said the solemn man
on the railroad tran. do you drink
Intoxicating Nquors?"
Sure" cried the convivial chap.
"Much obliged for the invitation. Got
a nask with you?"
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

He is a good time-saver that finds
out the fittest opportunity for every
action.-Thomas Fuller.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Important to Mothers
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORIA. safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that 1t
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Men are always betting that their
sins will not find them out.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
SYNOPSIS.
Copyright l9ns by The bs-MerriIl Company

Thomas ArdnOre and Henry Maine
Griswold stumble upon intrigue when tn"
governors Of North and South Carolina
are reported TO have quarreled Griswoid
allies himself with Barbara Osborne,
daughter Of the governor OF South caro-
Una while ArtmOre espOus"s the cause OF
Jerry banEerfieid. daughter Of the gov
ernor OF North Carolina. These TWO ladies
are trying To fill the shoes OF their IA
theirs. while the latter are missing. Ioth
states in turmoil over one Apple
weight. outlaw with great political In
dueuce Unaware of each other $ posi-
tion, both Gris~old and Ardmore set out
TO make the other prosecute. Both hay"
forces scouting the border Griswold cap
lures AppIew"ight, but Jerry finds him
and takes him to Ardsley, her own pris-
oner- Griswod and Barbara. while in
vestigatiug the outlaws disappearance.
meet Ardmore and jerry. the latter re-
veais tn" presence OF Appleweight al
NrIsiey- Ardrnor" arrests man on his
property who says ne Is Gov Osborne.
Meanwhile another man is arrested as
Appicweight by the South Carolina mil
ftia. The North Carolina militia is called
into action When Gillingwater. Jerry's
tianre, finds that real war Is afoot, he
1ccs
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Hunehbacks In Spanish Town.
One town in Spain has one hunch,
back to every - inhabitanta.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Henderson-When a man marries
he keeps his wife in dresses. hats.
shoes-in fact. everything she needs.
What does a wife keep her husband
in?
Henpeck (absently)-Hot water.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
More Likely.

1t is said that the Nicaraguans
would rather fight than eat.
But don't jump at the conclusion
that this is an indication of great
courage.
1t may mean poor cooking.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Hrs. Winsiow's Soothing Syrup.
FOR children teething softens the gums in
aannAtion. .Allsys paln. cures wind collie He hotHo
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20

Better y nagiess wife than q horse
less carriage.
The Idaho Springs siftings-news., 1910-08-20
CHAPTER XVII.

On the Road to Turner's.
who goes there2"
"A jug
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
NEW YORK.

New York. John A Dix, Demo crat, has defeated Henry L. Stimson, Ropuf :can. by more than 100000 nlrra Returns from 2.376 cleo ton c trcts out of %.oJS in New York state outside of the city of New York
 eoycrn0r give imson. 343,510, Dix 310,1S9 The city of New York. Miih only G7 cleo ion districts miss ng, gives Dix 290,2 ,25S, Stimson lSS,- 305. This ratio. if maintained, will give Dix total plurality in the city of 105, 400.
 Both the assembly and senate rs- turns ran strongly Democratic, and there were some notable upsets in even congressional districts. Repre- sentative Herbert Parsons a lifelong friend and political associate of Col. Roosevelt and formerly chairman or the Republican county committee, was ousted by Jefferson AL Levy, Demo crat. Representative W, W. Cox of Nassau county, Theodore Roosevelt 5 home seat. vas tiiped out by Martin Littleton, Democrat. William ;. Ben nett wa deIeated for congress by Henry George. a son of the pollticai economist. Screno E. Payne, father of fine tariff bill, was reelected, but his home town. Auburn. went for Dix aud Vice President Shermans candi' date for congress was defeated ny q Democfat.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
ARKANSAS.

Little Rock-In an election ill which the lightest vote that has been cast in years in congressional election, Arkansas elected seven Democratic congressman by large majoritics. No district was in doubt from tae time the polls opened until they closed.
 The seven congresmen elected are: R. B. Macon of the First district, w. A. Oldfield of the Second, J. C. Floyd of the Third, Ben Cravens of the Fourth, H. M. Jacoway of the Fifth, j. T. Robinson of the Sixth and W, s: Goodwin of the Seventh
 Of the seven running, only two were without opposition. They were R. E. Macon of the First district ana Ben Cravens of the Fourth. MT. Jacoway and Mir. Goodwin will be the only two new members in congress from this state.
 The election was not only one ot the lightest in point Of votes cast, but it was one of e ouie ct. h the First district, wh re R. B. Macon had no opposition, in s-sany prco nets no election was held.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02

How Thackeray Worked.

If ecarte is to be leld Fesnonsibie for Thackeray's appearance as an au- thor. bis cratic methods of m9rk contributed equally to his early dasst N He wrote invariably with the primer devil in attendance.
 'T can conceive nothing more .harassing in the literary way. Wro'e Motley to his wife in 1858. than Thackeray's way of living from aaitd to mouth I mean in regard @ the way he furnishes food 10 the pr'n'eF 5 devil Here he is just inis 'hTG the number that must appear in lew days Of course, whether i'll or welt stupid or fertile he must prod9iee the same amount Of fun pathos CT senu- mem, His gun must be regularly loa,ded and discharged at command should think it would wear his hfe out"
 Motley,s fears were realized win Tn a few years.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
MIN SOFIA.

St Paul, Minn.- Minnesota Repuo- licans elected complete state ticket. and the Indications are that eight Republicans aud one Democrat viii be sent to congress. Returns on the legislative ticket are incomplete, bur the indications are that the legisla- ture vii he Republican, insatjng the reelection of United States Senator Moses F. Clapp.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
WARNING ORDER.

Before A. N. Bohlngsr |ustic ot the Peace for the Township of nrinNiey' Nouu- ty of Monroe, State of 'Arkansus Black Groc " Company. Pialntiffs'
 vS.
 E. Gaynor De'S''us'''. The Defendant is warpess to appear In tbis Court within thirty days and answsr the complaint the plaintiff Black Grocery Co.,. A. N. HLiNGER. Oct. l7sh,s l9io Justice otthe Peace
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
MISSOURI.

St. Louis, Mo.-The official count probably will be required to deter mine whether the Republicans or the Democrats carried Missouri for the state ticket. The result is still in doubt, with both sides claiming vic tory. The Democrats claim majority of 51 on jo latniblcmfwypcmfwkcm of 51 on joint ballot in the legislature. Except for the Seventh district
 where Holmes Hall, Republican, has defeated c. W. Hamlin, Democrat
 the congressional situation remains unchanged The antiprohibitionists won by majority of about 175,000
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02

Chicago, lll.-The Democrats have won ev " office in the county, jul dicia .e:Id municipal tickets. They have cai ried at least 20 out of the g wards in Chicago.
 Danville, Ill-Speaker Cannon made the following statement: T am elected by coco am Repub- liean. I have kept the faith have srEorsed and have not apologized for 1ae Legislation of this congress. lie refused to comment on causes and effects of Demo ratic congressional victories.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
INDIANA.
Indianapolis, Ind.-senator Beye

Indianapolis, Ind.-Senator Beyer- idge, Republican, will be succeedeo by John w Kern Democrat the penn oerats h3 v.ng elected the majority oi the momlefs of the Indiana assem- bly. They will have majority on joint ballot of g. The Democratic state ticket was elected by about I5, GOO plurality.
 For the first time in E years the Democrats have control of every branch Of the state government 'u' two United States senators and all hut che member Of the congressional delegation.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
Texas Militia Is DemoraIized.

Dallas, Texas. With three line oi- lieers and four company officers nav ing rendered their resignations, anu -r,ca companies urgently requesting the governor to muster them out the Tesa National Guard is virtually de
 ized as the result of the recent
 i4,ion of sergeant Manley or Co.lD&nY E, who bayonetted and Ei. cl spectator when President Taft was in Dallas a year ago Man- ley was given a life sentence in the penitentiay.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
[,ral and Personal

Mrs. M. R. Stimson ana |,ehter, Felix, returned Ihurs- Esf t's this week from Paris, 1T RI. where they were called a1 sbs illness and death of Mrs. Enson's father L-Ns. Howard, of Union N Tenn, is visiting her 7 Mrs. ". D. Wade 0f ecity.
 |-urs. ]. L. Starrett and chll- ,a returned Saturday of last
 .i from Little Rock where :l,
 's suent Thanksgiving with
 Hives and friends.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
LOUISIANA.
New Orleans. -As usual, the Demo

New Orleans. .-As usual, the Demo cratic nominees for congress and state offices were elected without exeep- sion. The constitutional amendment providing state bond issue of S',
 oo.000 in support of the proposed international exposition to be heid in New Orleans in 1915 was over whelminsly adopted, as were all the other amendments to the constitutioh'
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
Rice Pact Gets Recruit.

Now Orleans. La.--South Carolina
 next to Louisiana the biggest rice- growing state in the Union, has loined hands with Louisiana and Texas n the movement for a producers con trol of the rice markets. Of lie tulted States. Former Governor llegWafa of South Carolina wired the oiilcesa of the fecently formed Southern Rice Growers Association tlsst South e'as olina would join in the farmers move ment and would be represented al She uext meeting of tho association.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
TENNESSEE.

Nashville, Tenn. B. W. Hooper, Republican and Fusisnist, was elect cd governor by from l5,00Q to 1S,000 majority. Both sides claim the sem ate, with the prospects favoring the fusionists. The fusionists elected the lower house by safe majority. All Democratic candidates for congress have been elected save one-Lyle, in the First district. The Democrats re- fuse to concede Hooper's election and cries of fraud are going up.
 The large cities went heavily for Taylor, Democrat. -a .
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
NEW JERSEY.

Trenton, N. JEarIy returns indi- cate that Woodrow Wilson, Demo crat, has been elected governor, the only state office to be filled, by be tween 25,000 and 3o,00O pl'ii aiity oyer Vivian M. Lewis, his Repubiiean oHponent.
 The Democrats have elected six and possibly nine. of tbc ten members of congress NeN JerSess present representation in congress is seven Republicans and three Democrats.
The Brinkley argus., 1910-12-02
snu Bird. Then Shoot t.

paris.-A Paris game dealer has discovered a paying stratagem for snortsmen who 1nsuecessfui- In +be basement of ae shop there Is a ,,o,,o,,n and .e of eelets and sportsmen Eo 'tia'' they have on ra vment G. laIl sAet al tAcil 9iisea sNa