The Grangeville globe. [volume] (Grangeville, Idaho) 1907-1922, 1910-07-28
WILL UNCLE JOE EAT GRASS


Tom McNeal, editor of the Farmers
Mail and Breeze of Topeka, Kans.,
and insurgent candidate for congress
in his home district, in speaking of
the recent incursion into that state
by Uncle Joe Cannon, just prior to
its enactment, remarked that he was
not expected to hang the insurgents"
on that trip, but that there would be
flourishing of the official cat-o-nine-
tails, a la Lagree, and a shouting of
intimidating threats, with a view to
getting proper lineup of the meal
citrants. McNeal then adds:
"The insurgent senators and rep
resentatives are, however,, to be pun
ished as far as possible. They are to
be treated as aliens and outcasts and
deprived of the right of patronage.
Not a crumb from the official table
is to go to them, If it can be prevent
ed.
Well, that sort of system has
sometimes proved to be effective and
then again sometimes it hasn't.
| One of the earliest cases of Cannon
ism recorded is found in the Book
of Daniel. The original Uncle Joe
Cannon was Nebuchadnezzar of Baby
Ion. Neb. was emphatically 1T in
that country and he insisted on all
that was coming to him and then
some. 1t Is human nature that when
man gets the itch for power he is
never satisfied with a reasonable
amount. He wants to make everybody
kow tow to him and keep kow towing
| Neb. hit upon a scheme that would
at once crafty his vanity and force
his retainers to show their colors.
He had golden image made whose
height was three score cubits and set
it up on the plain of Dura. Then he
sent for all the fellows, the princes,
the governors and captains, the judg-
es, the treasurers, the counsellors,
the sheriffs and the rulers of the prov
inces. Then the herald gave out
the order that at the sound of the
cornet. flute, harp, dulcimer and all
kinds of music everybody should fall
down and worship the golden image
that Nebuchadnezzar had set up.
When the time came, however, for
the fall down act there were three
insurgents who refused to fall, They
/ were Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-
nego.
When Neb. heard of this he was
warm all the way through and called
the three on the carpet and read the
riot act to them. 1t was a right try
Ing time for the three boys, but they
had their nerve with them and told
Neb. that, so far as they were con-
cerned, they would give it to him
straight. They had no intention of
falling down before his golden i'm
age
When he heard this Uncle Joe Can
non Nebuchadnezzar went into the
air, so to speak, and ordered his pri-
vate furnace heated seven times hot
ter than it was wont to be heated and
then he ordered his servile stand
pat followers to cast Shadrach, Mesh
ach and Abednego into the furnace,
which they proceeded to do.
Here was where Neb. had the ad-
vantage over Uncle Joe. What Neb.
said went. Uncle Joe has to take his
out in GUESSING and telling what he
would like to do. Well, here Is the
sequel. Neb. made 1t very hot for
three insurgents, but they came out
without even the smell of fire on
their garments. But what happened
to Neb.? In less than six months
he was eating prairie grass with the
town herd, till his hair was grown
like eagle feathers and his nail like
birds claws.
So it will be, metaphorically speak
ing, with your Uncle Joe Cannon. He
can rave to his hearts content and
tell how he would like to hang the
insurgents, but his day of power is
about over. 1t will soon be to the
woods nasture for JoSQnh