New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1910-04-14
THE TALK or THE DAY,

The Emanuel Congregation of Beaumont
Tex. wants new pastor and has published
the following advertisement: Wanted
Rabbi: young man. a native Of America or
England. that is a good lecturer. who can
make himself agreeable with either ortho-
dox or reform congregation. In other
words we want a mixer. We pay sl,5co
year"
Willis Are YOU going TO take your law
suit 10 q higher court?
CiiIlis-No. We have agreed to just double
the fees in this one instead.-Puck.
NO success: no parody That is the
atrlcal truism which can be demonstrated
by the great number Of Chantecler bur
lesaues now to be seen i'm Paris writes q
German correspondent from that city. The
Rostand play was a boon TO the spring
'revues' ] have not found time to visit all
the halls and gardens where the parodies
are being produced, but I have seen thus
far as monarch Of the barnyard, BRAND
Rostand. a garde republican and Fallieres.
In the revue entitled Chandeliers Sue
ccssor,' a monster pig takes the part OF the
hero. and i'm the last scene the animal IS
slain by a tiny lad. The Growing hen and
the rooster with Matching proclivities may
also be seen. At a caf6 near the Boulevard
de Strasbourg a young woman appears
nightly wearing a sunbonnet, wooden
shoes and tights. The stage is set as a
BARNARD and swarms with real live chick
ems The burden of the song which the
wooden-shoed sings is to the effect that
Rostand himself could not crow as well as
the black rooster"
Hobo-Na'am. I'm hungry I'll do any
thin fer some food.
Housewife-Poor man, ! won't make you
work Here's a fine hot hrCakfast-juSt
wash your hands
Hobo Ma'am / said + wuz hungry-not
starvin' and desperate.-Cleveland Leader.
The rumor that the Swiss government
suddenly faced with the necessity of eX-
e-uting a murderer. is about to seek the
loan Of 2 guillotine from France is a re-
minder that I'm the whole OF France there
are only two official guilotines. Both are
kept in Paris. hut one is specially reserted
for executions IN the provinces. II IS doubt
full IL one Of these could he spared. but il
time is no object one might be borrowed
from one of the French colonies which
have between them no fewer than nine.
The cost Of guillotines is said to be 81 20o
each. but they are evidently we'll made. for
the two now i'm use I'm France were made
in 1870 i'm the place Of those burned during
the I 0Tllnuuer ana bN al accounts lutl
still work q s well as when first tested on
a bundle OF straw.
jenkins is a man OF remarkable per
severance
is he+''
Yes. indeed lie has tried six different
kinds Cf hair Testorar aud he hasn't given
up the fight yct."-Tit-Bits.
A furniture dealer I'm Paris is showing A
novelty I'm the form OF bed. which is an
improvement on a similar one which at
tracted attention at the last Paris exhibit
ton II is to all appearances an ordinary
bed but the weight Of the body upon II
sets clockwork I'm motion, thus operating a
music box which gives forth soothing mCio-
dies The lulahies which II plays are sup
posed 10 induce sleep. by means or a dial
at the head of the bed the person who
occupies Il fixes alarm for the next
morning. This produces, when the hour ar
riyes. discordant sounds. to which the per-
son i'm bed must pay heed. because failure
to rise within five minutes after the noise
has begun will cause the bottom Of the bed
to fal! out.
Thirsty Thingumbob--Gee, / wisht had
some hard cider.
Rollingstoue NOmpSS-Cidcr amt no good
II has 10 work before it's ut TO drink
Philadelphia Record.