The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-02-09
aches for an easy salary and wants

"~ACS AOI al easy salary anu wants
power. He'll graft if you leave de
bars down. but 50 will a bookkeeper
fur an undertaken. it's our leetle way
to graft. De politicians Of de- kentry
don't steal half as much as de bankers.
jest remember dat when you read all
de hard things in de papers.
"G1veadam Jones reckoned he had
voted fur a dozen rascals bekase dew
was on his ticket, and he brides hisself
on wotin' de straight thing. don't
imagine dar was a single rascal among
de lot. Dey was simply average men.
Put a cash register into de office along
wild 'em and count up de receipts
cherry night. and dere will be no short
age. OATS anodder of our leetle ways.
We 'lect a man to handle our cash. glib
him all de chances in de world to steal
in fact. tempt him into it-and den
we wonder why he goes wrong. De
whole caboodle of us haven't got de
n of a corner grocer in dis direc-
ton.
Voting Straight a Mistake.
And a word or two bout wotin'
straight. De man who does it orter be
robbed. De man who votes fur an
unfit man >bekase dat pusson has got
a nomination on his ticket am de open
enemy of good and honest govern
ment. He's mo- to blame dan any
body else when things go wrong. OATS
anodder of u Ieetle ways. We re-
fuse to buy pore butter at de grocery
to please de grocer or de hull world
behind him. but we will vote fur men
whose regulations smell wuss'n de
butter. We do it and den kick bekase
we haven't better government.
And l want to say a word bout de
government. It's good 'nuff. It's good
u no matter what party am in
power. If we am asses 'nuf to call
a man a liar, a rascal and a thief and
den 'lect him to handle our money and
make u laws W. deserve what we
get. hear somebody kickin' cherry
day. but we hain't de least right to
find n word of fault.
I'm my time a governor or president
was looked upon al a great man. One
was at de head Of a state and de odder
at de head of a nashun. We spoke of
'em wild respect and awe. How am it
nowadays? De newspapers have car
TONED and belittled 'em until dew
e to stand no higher dan a country
constable. We demand on de one
hand dat dey shall be our greatest
men and Oh de odder dey am no SOON
er lected dan we 60 to work to pull
EN- down among de smallest. OATS
n of our leetle ways dat make us a
great people in de eyes of Europe.
But I'm wantin' to say to you dat
when de next lection Gums along
make no mistake. If you take a news
paper into your house you am gwine
to read dat de men you have allus
up to am rascals and thieves.
You will read dat if such a ticket am
not victorious de kentry am gwine to
fall into a pit so deep dat not a single
later will be saved. You am gwine to
read dat it depends on you alone
whether America continues prosperous
or has half Il dozen mo- panics.
What to Do on Election Day.
men will come to you and tell you
dis and dat and upset you. You'll be
made at last to think dat if you don't
vote fur a sartin %candydate fur Office
de town am gwine to be swept by
cyclones and toyed wild by earth
quakes. Jest you stick a pin dar.
Don't read de newspapers, and don't
let a stranger frew de gate. Jest keep
cool and quiet, and don't sweat your
collar, and when lection day Gums
along take your spade on your Shout
der and go to de woods and find a
groundhog's hole and dig him out. You
may not git him. but Pm tellin' you
dat you will have done jest as much
fur de kentry as if you had staggered
into a pollin' place and voted and
staggered out ag'in. Lots of good
citizens do go to de polls and vote.
and some Of EN- am so good dat dey
vote in four different precincts de
same day, but dar am odder good ones
who go out arter rabbits or ground
hogs, and it's bout an even thing as
to which am de best patriot. Let us
now saw de purceedin's in twain and
20 home"