Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1910-07-22
ROCKVILLE. MARYLAND. FRIDAY MORNING, JULY % 1910
BY +. A. mitchell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
The Bachelors club came to order,
the president In the chair
Fellow bachelors" he said, zone Of
our number shas .4cammittad matxi-
mony Edward Hammerton has tax
EN- to himself IL wife, will read arti-
Gle from our constitution, applying
TO his case:
when any member shall become en-
gagged or has been married he shall pay
a fine. and his membership In the club
shall cease lie shall state the arts by
which he was SHARED. IL there ARE palli-
ating circumstances In his case he shall
not pay the whole fine. but such portion
OF II as the club may consider q Just
amount In his case.
Mr.. Hammerton will now make his
statement"
Il assure you. gentlemen" said the
retiring member, that no intention
whatever to desert you ever entered
my head until a diabolical combina-
tion of young women In the town
where l live forced matrimony upon
me. These persons organized a club
eign land Between the mountains Of
India and Persia, have since under
stood. IL powerful tribe, among
whom the ladies can choose their own
husbands. All single woman has to
do when she wishes to change her
state " to send a servant to pin a
handkerchief to the hat OF the man on
whom her fancy lights, and he Is
obliged to marry her unless he can
show that he is too poor to purchase
her at the price her father requires.
INSPIRED by this suggestion from a
land where secret venOmous methods
underlie all social conditions, every
unmarried woman In the town where
| live formed a club-rather entered
upon conspiracy-tO force the bach
elors into matrimOny. One morning,
being about TO leave my home, on tax
ing my hat from the hall closet some
thing soft and scented fiuttered against
my hand | shuddered | had touch
ed the Indian poison flower and was
reminded OF Its waxen petals and its
seductive odor. Taking the hat to the
light, | saw pinned to II a blue silk
handkerchief In one corner OF which
was embroidered my monogram in
white silk thread. Observe, gentle
men, the insinuating method OF this
designing creature. She not only knew
how dear to every man IL his alma
mater. but she was aware that blue
Is the color of my college.
mind you. gentlemen. did not at
the time know OF this society or Of Its
malevOlent purpose, for the members
kept both secret 80 long as possible. |
asked my butler how the handkerchief
came to be pinned to my hat. He
said that the servant OF Miss Eugenia
Tomllnson. living at the other end Of
the street, had called before was
out Of bed. asked for my hat and at
taehed the handkerchief Why he had
done 30 he did not state.
Going to my club after had break
tasted, ! sat down to a cigar and
paper. In the paper read full ac-
count Of the organization and prac-
tees of this pestilent Indian plant that
had been imported to our soil. [ also
read list OF the bachelor heads that
had already fallen and was aghast to
see the names Of two Of my most lnti-
mate friends.
SEPARATION starting out on me, and |
have already received deadly Black
Hand notification.
The lady who had thus marked me
for matrimonial misery, both from her
beauty and general attractiyeuess, was
all powerful. Any man on whom she
pinned the skull and crossbones must
walk the plank. There was no hope
for him. Nevertheless, though seeing
the signal to heaye to. l made UP my
mind to pay no attention to It. |
simply sailtl On minding my own
business"
why didn't you take to an aero
planer u member Interrupted.
"RatsW "BuncOmbeP Brave bOyr
and the like greeted the speaker.
"One week after the receipt Of the
signal" he continued, the period
given biacklisted bachelors by this
club, met one OF my most respected
woman friends on the street. She
cut me dead. The same day | met
several others and received the cut
direct from all. Here was, indeed,
q boycott. You must remember,
gentlemen, that, although we do not
wish to surrender our independence
to these crer lures, to be ostracized by
them Ii serious matter. In time I
was cut by every unmarried woman In
town. Besides, the most attractive
married women were honorary mem
beers Of the club and Joined the boy
colt.
And then. gentlemen, appeared the
most alluring feature OF this maIiK.
nant scheme. Last OF all my femi-
nine acquaintance / met the girl into
whose tolls II was intended that
should fall. A seductive blush over
spread her features, q bewilderinR
smile parted her vermllIon lips and
showed two rows Of pearls beneath;
then a modest dropping Of the eyes.
These women who had united 10 as
sist In sharing me were all denying
me the benefit OF their society for the
purpose VI driving me like an limo
cent bird in'D the opening OF the net
ukAN .Ngl g..