davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
SIMPLE STATEMENT OF FACT
Mr.. johnson Unable to See Where in
Any Way He Had Put His
Foot In H."

II is common to deplore the lack OF
humor in person. Yet the very
want of ii may save certain amount
OF embarrassment. as was the case
on certain occasion with President
Johnson. He was one day" says a
writer in Harper's Magazine. visit
ing my mother. and a friend, Mrs.
Knox. widow, came in. She had
known Mr.. Johnson some years be-
fore. when he was member of the
legislature. but they had not met since
then.
After mutual recognition. Mr.
Johnson said, How is Mr.. Knox?
have not seen him lately.
He has been dead six years. said
Mrs. Knox
81 thought | hadn't seen him on
the street. said Mr.. Johnson.
when Mrs. Knox left, my mother
said, laughing. That was funny mis-
take of yours about Mr.. Knox
What mistake did | make? said
Johnson. i said hadn't seen him on
the street, and | hadn't"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
KEEPING 1t DRY.

An old woman of wealthy New
Jersey family was going visiting The
coachman, who had not been in this
country long, had just been equipped
with a new uniform and new silk
hat. Before they had gone far 1t be-
gan to sprinkle. and the old woman
told the coachman to fasten down the
side curtains of the wagonette.
He drove up to hitching post be.
side the road and, dismounting, hung
his new hat on the post. and begun to
fasten the curtains
The old woman noticed his bare
head and asked him where his hat
was.
"Oi took 1t off me head, mum, so as
is wouldn't get wet" the coachman
replied
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
A New Version.

Lawyers have a peculiar system of
abbrevation, such words as trustees.
executors being cut down to trees.
exors, and admors. This practise led
to an amusing slip on the part of
solicitor who, somewhat late in life.
abandoned his profession and entered
the church. A few Sundays after his
ordination he startled his congrega-
ton while reading the lesson by deliv-
ering one of the passages as follows:
81 see men as trustees walking"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Another Tradition Exploded.

Two Englishmen were resting at
the Red Horse Inn" at Stratford-on-
Avon. One of them discovered a
print picturlng low tumbling build
ing underneath which was printed ::
The House in Which Shakespeare
Was Born" Turning to his friend in
mild surprise he pointed to the print
His friend exhibited equal surprise. and
called waiter who assured them OF
the accuracy of the inscription.
Pom my word" said the observ
ing Englishman, shaking his head
obviously. u thought he was born IL
a manager! '-Success Magazine.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Quotation Marks.

Senator Beveridge, in an afterdin-
ner speech in Cleveland, said of cor
rupt politician:
the excuse that a certain minister of
fered on being convicted of plagiar-
ism.
Brethren, said this minister, it
is true that ! occasionally borrow for
my sermons, but | always acknowl-
edge the fact in the pulpit by raising
two fingers at the beginning and two
at the end of the borrowed matter,
thus indicating that it is quoted
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Judge Nicholas Longworth, who
used to sit on Ohio's supreme bench,
looked unnaturally grave. and a
neighbour in recognition of his facial
depression, named pet owl Judge
Longworth' II was the very next
day that an excited maid broke up his
wifes garden party ooh, madam, -
said she. Madam. Judge Longworth
has laid an egg"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
E)O(IIH'
" xxx i
WOMEN AS POULTRY RAlSERS
Attention Is Drawn to Pleasure and
Profit in This Industry on
Any Farm.

like to draw the attention of farm
girls to poultry culture, says a writer
In Michigan Farmer While many girls
are called, have no doubt, to be
teachers. | am sure that II some other
girls knew the pleasure and profit de-
rived from poultry culture. they might
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Impounded.

Wife-Really. George. | get to
weigh more every week now
Husband-True; I've long seen that
] married you on the installment plan.
Shore and Country.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Nipped In the BUD.

Inc Minister (stopping to tea)---
no, thank you. | must decline on the
cucumbers.
hl''le lommie-Guess you're afraid
Oh lhe tnmmy ache. but you don't need
to be. cuz when have Il mamma al
ways rubs---" G. N-Roston Her.
aid
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

passed too freely. |
often staggered as II
drunk. | could not
lie In bed over half
an hour. My side was
numb. sight affected.
and a tingling sensa-
ton covered my
body. 1t actually
seemed as II | would
go crazy. ! was
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
A Senator's Criticism.

Senator Penrose was talking on one
of the Atlantic City piers about the
stormy "Elecktra" of Richard Strauss.
Strauss is very original" said a
listener, but senator, do you think
his theory Of music is sound?"
YES, indeed-all sound" was the
reply.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
On the Bayou.

Il understand that the new law
says that all power boats must carry
a life preserver for each person on
board?'
Eyes, we have them
"WelO2 IN ready to drink mine
right non. Houston Post.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
GEORGES WAY.

Sue-Don't you know, George kissed
tne at the door last night twice before
4, could stop him!
Mae-Gracious! What cheek
Sue-BOth Smart Set
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Father Foroot Himself.

Father-Now, Maud, in selecting a
husband. look for intelligence and in
ID Dity. before all things. Your moth
er, IN sorry to say, looked only for
moneyW
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
The Truth.

Sunday School Teachcr-"Now,
Johnny. why do we put penny In
the plate today?
johnny" Cause there amt nuthin'
smaller. "-Glarper's Bazaar
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

The secret of life is not to do what
one likes, but to try to like that which
one has to do; and one does like it
in timed. Nj. Craik.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Less Lavish.

Il saw Uncle Toms Cabin played
recently"
"So?"
Il think I'll read the book"
You may be disappointed. The
book mentions only one little Eva and
one Lawyer Marks. Louisville Cour-
ier-Journal.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

The eastern states, from Maine to
Alabama, produced gold worth $685.
l43 and silver worth $35.U70 last year.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Snubbed.

Flashy Young Woman called to
see if you didn't require a beautiful
model"
Artist-"Why, have you got
friend ?"-Boston Transcript.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

your new maid looks very dis
Greet"
Indeed. she is She even knocks
at all the drawers before opening
them. "-Pele Mele.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Man will have what he desires, and
will find what is really best for him.
exactly as he honestly seeks it,
Froude
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Found Out.

Il once did that man favor which
placed him forever in my debt"
Il have often wondered why he
hated you So"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

saved from fatal Bright's disease by
Doans Kidney Pills and my health i'm
proved wonderfully"
Remember the name-Doan's. For
sale by all dealers. so cents box.
FosterMilburn Co.. Buffalo. N. Y.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
No Raotinne for Her.

dance with you?
She-Certainly, but it must be very
slow, as | have just gone into mourn.
ing-Frou-Frou
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Among the important improvements
contemplated in Japan are the quad
rupling of the Tokio-Yokohama rail
way, and the improvement OF the
Kioto X ODE line. so that very much
higher speed may be developed.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
DRIVEN ALMOST CRAZY.
Bakersfield, Cal, Wonrsrs Awful SUI.
ferinq.

Mrs. ii. w. Heagy, 1915 l. St. Ia.
kersfield, Cal, says: Doctors failed
to help me and | was in despair The
kidney secretions scalded terribly and
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Miss Silligirt (sobbing)-"1 think
It's awful mean. That horrid Jones
girl has been saying that / paint"
Miss Meannesse-"Never mind, dear.
! expect If she had your complexion
she'd paint, too
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Statistics are almost as unsatiafa.,.
tory as facts are stubborn.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

DIT Pierces Plea SAINT Pellets mrs, put up 40 years
ago. They reRulnte and invigorate stoma b. llv er
and bowels. Sugar-coated tiny granules.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Better nagless wife than horse
less carriage.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

The Man in the Chair enjoy a
quiet smoke.
The Other-Well. you'll never be
troubled with crowds while you
smoke cigars of that brandt
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

Mrs Winsiow's Soothing syrup
Forchidren tsething. softcns he gums redu,~s,~
nmnation. allays palm cures collie ~ a b.,,,i~
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Refinement.

Model sit a good deal for the
burst. you know
Artist-For the?
Model-That depends on where you
bust" but think that's so vulgar
The Bystander
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19

CCsssO 0AHSA
Henderson-When man marries
he keeps his wife in dresses, hats,
shoes-in fact, everything she needs.
What does wife keep her husband
in?
Henpeck (absently) Hot water
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
Important to Mothara

Many a man who stops TO think
twice fails to act once.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1910-08-19
If . @s''s s;s. T ass Thompson's Eye Water

kill THE FLIES AND GERMS formula.
dime mex pensve and harnless. Nor SIS, Delhi, La
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
MINIMUM TARIFF is
WELCOMED BY JAPAN
Announcement Made by Ambassador
O'Brien in Toxic Commented on
FaVorabIy by the Press

TOXIC, Feb. 16.-The announcement
that the United States will grant its
minimum tariff rates to Japan. which
was communicated to the foreign office
by United States Ambassador O'Brien
and published in all the newspa pers,
has been received by the commercial
interests of the empire with the live
lest satisfaction.
1t was stated at the foreign office
today that the government never had
doubted that the United States would
thus reciprocate proving to the world
that America desired the best Of trade
relations with this country.
The leading newspapers comment
conservatively upon the action of the
committee on immigration of the
house of representatives in unanimous
ly voting to report favorably the Hayes
exclusion bill. They express the con-
viction that congress will not pass the
measure which, while not mentioning
Japan, nevertheless would prevent
ing the treaty rights which the Jap
anese government practically waived
without convention out of consider
alton for the wishes of the people of
the Pacific coast of the United States
two years ago.
Since that time Japan has prevented,
by her own regulations, emigrations of
japanese laborers to the United States.
However, the newspapers and public
do not show the least i'll feeling over
the matter and there is no evidence of
a tendency toward jingoism.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
ROOSEVELT TARRlES
IN CONGO FORESTS
Former President Delays Departure
to Gondokoro So He Can Hunt
Giant Glands and More
Elephants

GONDOKORO, Soudan, (on the Up
per Nile), Feb. 16-Until Colonel Roose-
welt reaches Khartoum it will be i'm
possible to outline with any degree of
accuracy his plans for his visit to the
European capitals.
The former president was due to ar
rive here today, but owing to his de-
sire for a hunting expedition for efe-
plants and giant Glands, on the Congo
side of the Bar-el-Jabel, which will oc-
cupy a day or more, he will not reach
Gondokoro until tomorrow night or
Friday.
The trip down the Bar-el-Jabel and
the White Nile in the launch of Gen.
Sir Reginald Wingate, sirdar of the
Egyptian army, will then begin. A
short stop will be made at Khartoum,
where Mrs. Roosevelt will meet her
husband. The voyage down the Nile
to Cairo will be leisurely.
The date for Mr.. Roosevelt's lecture
in Berlin is uncertain, but it probably
will be about May Is.
Prior to that he will deliver his ad-
dress at Christiania, before the Nobel
peace prize commission. His engage
ments also include an address at the
Sorbonne, Paris, in April, a visit to
Italy and hurried trips to Vienna and
Budapest.
Colonel Roosevelt will reach England
the third week of May and will sail
for New York the middle of June. All
dates, however, are provisional for the
present.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
MAN FROM VENTURA
lars CHICAGO POLICE
sURRENnERS HIMSELF WHILE
TEMPORARILY DAZED
SAYS He Doesn't Know Where money
Came from-Sheriff McMartin
Declares. Bad Checks
Might Be Answer

CHICAGO, Feb 16.-Chicago police
officials yesterday encountered
strange case in criminology-or psy-
chology-they don't know which.
The case involves a young man VINO
gave his name as Frank Major ana
his home as Ventura, Cal His eyes
swollen and bloodshot, his clothes ana
linen of good quality, but rumpled up
and soiled, he appeared IN the ONCE VI
Chief of Police Steward.
my name is Frank Major, ana my
home is in Ventura, Cal.," he said, ao-
dressing Chief Steward. THE last l
remember [ was in Ventura. L had
SS. Today 1 woke up in Chicago win
more money than l know What TO 40
with.
What has happened, l don't KNOW
I think l must have committed some
crime. 1 wish you would lock me up.
Wire to Ventura and find out what L
did,
"Well, 1 believe we can accommodate
you," said the chief.
Nailor was searched, but no money
was found in his pockets. He was
locked up while Lieut.. Gleason wrote
out a telegram to the police of Ventura
The police received this reply:
81 hold a felony warrant for Frank
Nailor. Arrest him and wire me. II. D.
McMartin, sheriff Ventura county,
Call
HE is neither crazy nor dope
fiend," Lieut.. Gleason said. His case
is q puzzle to me-"
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
ROOSEVELT WEDDING
DATE IS AWAITED
Society In East Eager to Learn When
Former Presidents Son Will
Marry Miss Alex
ander

NEW YORK, Feb. 16.-Much inter
est centers in the announcement soon
to be made of the date of the wedding
Of Theodore Roosevelt, jr., to Miss
Eleanor Alexander, whose engagement
was announced resently.
Miss Alexander is a beautiful young
woman and a member of a family
prominent in New York society. She
is 81 years old, one year younger than
her future husband. Miss Alexander
is the daughter of Mr.. and Mrs. Henry
Addison Alexander, who were divorced
several years ago.
She has been acquainted with her
fiance since childhood, but neither will
admit how long the engagement has
existed. Theodore Roosevelt, jr., is the
eldest child of the ex-president by his
second and present wife, who was Miss
Edith Carow. He is half brother of
Mrs Nicholas Longworth.
Miss Ethel Roosevelt and Kermit,
Archibald and Quentin Roosevelt are
younger children of the ex-president.
The wedding, which is to be cele-
brated on an elaborate scale, will be
deferred until the arrival in America
of the bridegroom s father. He heart
ily approves of the match.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
STRANGE FATALITY IN
BIG CAPITOL SCANDAL
Sixth Man Implicated in Frauds ir
Great Harrisburg State House
Furnishing Dies Suddenly

HARRISBURG, Pa, Feb. 16.-The
strange fatality that has pursued some
of the principal figures in the capitol
scandal was again brought to public
mind today when John E. Stott, one OF
the chief witnesses in the celebrated
case, was found dead in the bathroom
of the house where he made his home
while in Harrisburg.
He is the sixth man in the case to
die. His death was due to heart dis
ease.
Stott was secretary to the board OF
public grounds and buildings which let
many of the contracts for furnishing
the capitol that brought more than a
dozen men to the bar of justice. He
was a witness in two trials and was to
take the stand in the case of Joseph
M. Huston, architect of the capitol,
whose trial was to come up next
month. Two of the six men who died
were under two years sentence. one
was awaiting trial and two were i'm
portant witnesses. Besides these one
of the many men under indictment
has been confined in an asylum.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
is WANTED IN VENTURA FOR
PASSING FRAUDULENT CHECKS

VENTURA, Cal. Feb. 16.-Frank
Nailor, who surrendered to the police
in Chicago, Tuesday, is wanted by
Sheriff McMartin of this county for
forgery. Nailor is an eX-convict, hav-
ing served three years in Folsom pris-
on for grand larceny committed IN
Lassen county in 1906. He was en-
leased on parole and was employed by
James Mack of this city in his livery
stable.
Nailor worked faithfully here for
year and a half
Saturday, February 5, he drew the
wages coming to him, 50, and then
forged three checks aggregating $1OO'
which he cashed with local merchants.
Sheriff McMartin was notified Monday
and has been after Nailor since that
time. Little is known of his past rec
ord. He served in the United States
army under an assumed name and was
honorably discharged. He enlisted al
SO in the navy and received an hon
orable discharge. His offense in Las
sen county was the stealing OF checks
from a roommate and cashing them:
Sheriff McMartin cannot understand
how Nailor could have had mucn
money with him when he only had
$100 when he left Ventura.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
CONSPIRACY TO DEFRAUD
DENIED BY HAMILTONS
Mining Company Officials File Demur-
rer in Police Court to Charges
Made Against Them

e. M. Hamilton, Truman w. Hamil-
ton, +. M. Hamilton, w. Lester Hamil-
ton and Sherman Page, officers and di-
rectors of the Hamilton Mining and
Milling company, accused by A. E.
Wiley and other directors Of the Ante
lope Valley Gold Mining company,
with conspiracy to defraud the officers
of the latter corporation by transfer
ring 100000 shares of treasury stock in
the Hamilton company without due
process of sale, appeared in Police
Judge Chambers court yesterday
morning and through their attorneys
filed a general demurrer to the COM
plant setting forth that the allega-
tions in the complaint are not sufi-
cient to constitute a public offense.
Judge Chambers released the ac-
cused ON their own recognizance and
will hear arguments on the demurrer
at IL o'clock this morning.
The Hamiltons say their arrest is
nothing more or less than to assist the
directors of the Antelope company to
force certain demands which should
be taken up in a civil action. They
say they are confident the matter will
be dismissed in police court.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
YOUTHFUL HEIRS
LOT IS DISCUSSED
CUSTODY OF BARNARD Chill
DREN BEING CONSIDERED
ATTORNEY TALKS IN REGARD To
THEIR sPlRITING AWAY
Relatives Only Wish to Insure Their
Welfare and Do Not Desire to
Control Their Share of Es-
tate Left by Mother

The alleged kidnapping of the three
youthful heirs to the $500,000 estate left
by their mother, Mrs. Julia Fletcher
Barnard, who were spirited away in an
automobile from Pasadena Monday
night to Riverside, where they were
found by Miss Helena Barnard, was
discussed yesterday by State Senator
Leroy A Wright of San Diego, attor-
ney for eastern relatives of Mrs. Bar
nard. Senator Wright, who took the
children away, said the only motive in
the effort of the eastern relatives of
Mrs. Barnard to gain the possession of
the children was to protect them in
their interests. Mrs. Barnard died last
week.
Senator Wright and Mrs. Stoughton
A. Fletcher, slster-in-law of Mrs. Bar
nard and Miss Hilda Fletcher, Mrs.
BarnardS sister, both of Indianapolis,
are at the Van Nuys hotel.
1T is the happiness and welfare of
the children that the relatives of Mrs.
Barnard are looking out for, and they
do not wish to control the children's
share of the estate said Mr.. Wright,
when asked as to the motive for the
kidnapping. THE fact that the father
has been sick for a number of years
and is at present an invalid and that
his recovery is in doubt, and the es-
arrangement between Barnard and his
wife, constitute reasons which we think
are sufficient for placing the children
under the guardianship of the wife's
relatives.
although we will try to get control
of the children, we will not refuse the
father the privilege of visiting them, as
we have all the respect in the world for
his love for the children. If it is neceS-
sary, the Fletchers will fight the case
to the end until they gain the possess
sion of the children"
According to Senator Wright, Mr..
Barnard and his wife did not live to-
gether after September 1907, at which
time they became estranged at Coro-
nado, before going to Pasadena.
Friends of Mr.. Barnard say the trou-
BILE was due to the illness of Mr.. Bar
nard that made him mentally irritable
and made it imperative for Mrs. Bar
nard to live apart from him.
The children were taken back to
their home at All Palmetto drive, Pas
adena. yesterday afternoon, under the
guardianship of Miss Helena Barnard,
their fathers sister where they will be
under the care of a nurse and French
goVerness. Their mothers relatives,
Miss Hilda Fletcher and Mrs. Fletcher
of Indianapolis, will be permitted to re-
main at the Barnard residence and be
with the children until the arrival of
the father or some other amicable ar
rangement is effected. This was ar
ranged at a conference yesterday after
noon of the attorneys for both parties,
Lynn Helm, representing A. G. Wells,
general manager of the Santa Fe rail-
road, brother-in-law of Mr.. Barnard,
and Senator Leroy A. Wright of San
Diego, representing the Fletchers of
indianapolis, relatives of Mrs. Barnard.
Mr.. Barnard is expected to leave
Brookline, Mass, February 20, and is
due to reach Los Angeles on Thursday
of next week.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
BATHTUB is UNKNOWN TO
MILLIONS, SAYS EXPERT
Terrible Conditions in Crowded Tene-
ment Districts of New York Ex-
posed by Charity Director

NEW YORK, Feb. 16.-"More than a
million persons among New York S
tenement house poor are strangers to
the bath tub" says Lawrence WELLER,
director OF the tenement house commit
tee of the Charity Organization So
ciety, in a report on sanitary problems
Just submitted to the society
New York's tenements are without
a parallel in the world" continues Mr..
WELLER. "The congestion is unparal-
leled. There are 10000 discredited tene-
ments of antique type with neither sun
light nor fresh air; there are 100000
living rooms without a window; there
are 10000 violations of tenement house
laws now pending before the commits
sioner. Three million persons in New
York live in buildings that are in
constant danger from fire."
Los Angeles herald., 1910-02-17
PRISON REFORM URGED

Mrs. Alice Stebbins Wells of the
Prison Reform league, in an address
last night before members of the
Memorial Baptist church strongly urged
the cooperation of all religious bodies
with the prison reform work. There
is without doubt" she said, "much
room for improvement in the treatment
of our prisoners, and it is the duty of
the churches as well as all organiza-
tions humanely inclined to help abolish
this shameful condition of affairs. The
penitentiary should exist for the care
and cure of crime instead of the
breeder of it, and its influence should
be for good and not for bad" said Mrs.
Wells