davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
kAMSAS cOAAENT
YOUR OWN HEALrH BOARD

The proposal to establish a national
bureau OF health has created some dis
senslon among those whose business it
IS to promote the health of others.
some reason for that, since the bill
TO be passed or defeated seems to give
the allopaths q monopoly in such mat
lers- Naturally the osteopaths, homeo-
paths, physical culturists, and others,
slgnt trouble ahead, and raise a wall.
1t seems right and proper that the ma
tlonaI government should show as
great interest in human health as it
devotes to the welfare of live stock.
But, on the other hand. 1t should be
borne in mind that the human animal
is more intelligent than the horse OF
hog, and that, therefore, more of
mans health depends upon the care
he gives himself than is the case with
the lower animals. And this will be
true. whether pill peddlers or purveyors
of the prayer cure finally secure con-
troll of the national board. The quar-
rel among the branches of the profess
sional health makers doesn't greatly
concern the amateurs. -Atchison
Globe.
SOME OF THE THINGS NEEDED.
Next to raising food for the constant
ly growing population, the most I'M
portant problem is to get that 1000 10
the people. The railways are the only
means of transportation and every rail-
way system is at present hampered by
a lack of terminal facilities which are
very expensive. Congress, instead or
building roads leading to the rural rail-
way centers and assisting in securing
good distributing facilities, is hamper
ing the railways by unjust and unfair
legislation which frightens capital and
makes improvement ts impossible. Let
us own the railways" is the cry in
answer to all this, yet able business
men and politicians have pointed out
that the government, II run on busi-
ness principles could get along with 300
million dollars less of the peoples mon
ey each year. How long would the
railroads pay expenses under govern
ment control? What is needed is fewer
battleships and canals and more rock
roads and better farmers.-Leavenwor
Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
AYHAWKER JOTS

Before abandoning the English Ian.
guage completely, the Wichita Beacon
| would like know what the Esperanto
word is for three Dagger"
why is it." asks the Atchison
Champion. that man will do the
very same thing he will cuss another
man for doing?" Oh. just because.
Paul Lovewell has an idea that toe
much credit Is given the man who
makes new record for high flight
| in an aeroplane- He says 1T really
makes little difference whether a man
falls one mile or five.
Charlie Blakesley notes that one of
the Garden City Telegraph's hobbies is
making one word of two. 1t uses
"Rockyford'' and "Greatbend." But as
Brother Blakesley says sit doesn't dare
to refer to Gardencity."
A story new to the Beloit Call: An
Irishman, in passing a new building,
was struck on the head by falling
brick. He employed lawyer to bring
suit for damages. The lawyer effected
settlement for $500, and gave the
Irishman 800. Say" said the Irish
man to the attorney. "who was it got
hit with that brick; you or me?"
1.-THE grandstander we always have
with u.s." writes the discerning Bert
Walker in his Osborne Farmer. II be-
long to lodges and we have him there
in all his glory. You belong to church
and you know that he shines there like
an electric headlight on foggy night.
You will see him in politics and in the
business world. I don't care where
you go, you will find the grandstander.
1 have even seen him do a stunt at a
funeral. You will notice him in the
baseball game and in the parade. And
surely, after our labors on this bright
planet are completed and we wander
on to that bourne from which no trav-
eler returns, we shall find the grand
stander there working eighteen hours
day 1 fully expect 1t and shall be
disappointed if mistaken. But the
grandstander does very little real
harm. He makes a person very tired
on hot warm day, but there is no
real danger in him. He runs his brief
course and then his place is taken by
another performer who puts on a diff
ferent stunt, but it is always the same
old grandstanding performance in the
end julius Caesar grandstanded
when on the Lupercal he thrice refus-
ed the crown and the world has been
at it ever since in one way or another"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
QUAKER MEDITATIoNs.

lFrom the Philadelphia Record.1
The favorite dog of the aviator must
be the Skye terrier.
I This may be the land Of the free
until you go to buy real estate. q
1t isn't a wise plan to be compelled
to patch up your differences with court
plaster.
The most popular advice to give a
women is to tell her to do as she
pleases.
Those who dance must pay the
piper, if they can't have the music
charged.
The things we don't put off till to-
morrow are generally the things we
shouldn't do at all.
Would you say that man was too
clever by half when his better half has
all the cleverness?
leave footprints in the sands of time
there are a dozen who want to cover
UP their tracks.
We are told that the Lord made man
in His own image, but woman seems
to feel the necessity of improving her
appearance.
Nell-"Miss Antique says she
wouldn't marry any man on earth.'
Belle-"Well, I suppose we shall soon
have airship weddings"
Mrs. Guzzler-"Aren't you ashamed
to come home In this condition?'' Mr.
Guzzler-"Mortified to death. NV dear
find that my capacity isn't what it
used to be-"
Il went fishing the other day and
forgot my glasses" said the nearsight-
ed man. well, can't you drink out Of
the bottle ?" demanded the man with
tae fmQreasionisftc nose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
Avenge Dogs Death.

Barney Gallagher of Lansdowne. rar
over dog with his automobile yester-
day near Llanerch. There is nothing
particularly novel In this, for automo-
biles will continue to run over dogs as
long as there are automobiles and care
less dogs. The dogs usually die. In
this also there was nothing unique
about the dog of Llanerch, for he
emitted one short, regretful yelp and
Joined his forefathers.
Ordinarily such an accident causes
regret, and If the dog is valuable, some
money changes hands. Barney was
sorry for this dog, too. Had he known
that the animal was going to get In
his way, he would never have invited
a party Of friends to motor with him
to VALLEY Forge. or, at least, he would
have gone another way; for the things
that followed the demise of the dog
were numerous and exciting.
Coincident with the death of Rover
realized that tire had been punctured.
Regrets for the animal were mingled
with some ingrowing language on the
part of the chauffeur, and he climbed
out of the car to repair the damage.
1t involved his sitting down.
Gallagher sat down. He Immediately
arose again with an agility seldom seen
outside of circus, and emitted a yell
that would have drowned a motor
siren. Then he fled. People of
1lanerch have a careless naD1t or leaY-
ing their nests Of hornets in the mid
die of the road, where stalled autoists
can sit upon them. That's what hap
pened to Barney.
The stung young man drew a "bee"
line for Cobbs creek, followed in turn
by his guests and the angry hornets.
Reaching the creek, he was unable to
pull up suddenly enough, and landed
in the middle Of it. The hornets re-
turned to their crushed home to make
repairs, and French and the young wo-
men proceeded to fish out Barney. In
the excitement two of the latter-Miss
Leighton and Miss Gertrude Kelly
tumbled into the creek, too
French and the remaining Misses
Kelly, by dint of much exertion, sue
ceeded in landing the trio safely. Then
they made their sorrowful way back to
the automobile. Gallagher concluded
that he would be hornswoggled or
something If he would monkey with
the tire in that vicinity again; so they
ali entered the car and limped back TO
the Kelly chateau, where they were
dried out There. safe from the
marauding hornets, the tire was re-
paired. But the trip to Valley Forge
was postponed. = Philadelphia North
American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
HVAOR OF THE Day

A POINTER to Qthers.-He-Going to
t marry the he rich h Jack Hammond? Why.
the dogs. sheuso hs d,d an ms money to
ed out to be retrievers.-M. A. p - 7'''i
The Worm Turns.-Guest tdriven abso-
lutely desperate by the depreciative airs
of very superior maid in country house,
y we co naSe yog got stnsthng own
stander.
A Very Palpable Hit.-The Lady Golfer
ball anywhere? The Unfortunate Man.
No madam; but I can show you the ex-
act spot on winch II feii.-The Sketch.
Soaring married an old man who
Is very rich I went one better on that.
married young aviator who Is a mill
lionaire. ''-Pele Mele.
His spasm of Courage--Mrs Henpeck
with newspaper)-It says here that but
termilk viii extend ones life to over a
hundred. Henpeck (wearily)-If I was a
bachelor, I'd take to drinking it.-Boston
Transcript
What 9,,t,i makes Mrs Elipperty look so
d deSt1 ps nysl da1or mo Has MIS- Ftp
twoH'-Cieveland Plain Dealer sne mao
New Thoughtist-why. what's the mat
New Thoughtist-Don't you know IL YOU
ache? Old Thoughtist-Don't you know
that If you had this toothache you
wouldn't have any faith?-Cleveland
Leader.
1T will be magnanimous. said the
French duelist. Rather than risk taking
human life will fire In the air" Don't
do that responded his second; you'd
be almost sure to hit an aviator."-Wash-
ington Star.
Achilles was lamenting his vulnerable
heel. But you can talk all right" they
assured him. Thus he saw the main
requisite for fight remained.-New York
Sun.
:. The defender in that breach of promise
case manages to be cheerful" Yes" re-
piled Miss Cayenne, ''he has at least the
ent position he attracts more attention
than he would have as bridegroom. -
Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
GLOBE SIGHTS.
GFrom the Atchison Globe. ]

lFrom the Atchison Globe.1
II you can't be ideal in any other
way, be an ideal poor kin.
What has become of the barber who
spent his time playing the mandolin
Those who are in love and a boy
who is eating watermelon, shouldn't be
criticised.
Women have a funny way of refer
ring to the bright spots in their lives
as if they were as large as melons.
Considering the practice they have,
BARRIERS do a mighty unsatisfactory job
at combing their customers hair.
A man with large family hasn't a
great deal to be proud of, unless he
also takes good care of the children.
People often say, "In few years, I
will buy an airship and fly every
where" It's p joke; the airship will
always be dangerous toy.
We confess a curiosity to know
whether society women bore each
other as much as they do outsiders
who meet them in the magazines and
newspapers.
1t is estimated that every man who
rides to his work in the morning in a
buggy. causes at least three people to
hate him every morning because he
doesn't invite them to ride.
When a man succeeds in saving q
little money, he begins to look around
for an investment. And more than
half the time, he makes an investment
that results in disaster. Look twice
before you invest your hard earned
money; remember the old, safe rules.
Consult some sensible business man
who has succeeded in saving his
money.
After a woman begins to wear
glasses she quits crying so readily. She
can't cry with them on, and taking
them off every time thetears begin to
flow is such a nuisance that she has
decided to cry less. Women who don't
wear glasses may still be seen dissolved
in their own tears, but we claim that a
woman weeper with specs over her
nose Is a rare sight
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago News. ]

[From the Chicago News.J
Even wise men do a lot of foolish
things.
The lazy man never seems to tire of
what he isn't doing.
It's easier to find a friend than it is
to lose an enemy.
Don't look for trouble. You'll
bump up against it soon enough.
A bore never finds out what people
think of him unless they are busy.
1t doesn't hurt US to fall into for
tune-even if it consists of hard cash.
The old COW has the milkman beaten
to fragile when it comes to giving
real milk.
A fool may give wise man advice.
but if the latter takes it his wisdom is
apt to go wrong.
A doctor may not be sure of his
diagnosis, but he takes the patients
money merely as a guaranty of good
faith.
Your side of the argument may be
convincing as far as you are concern
ed, but what is the use IL it doesn't
convince the other fellow2
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
Asher Kinds in Congress,


The nomination of Asher C. Kinds
In the First Maine district, IL ratified
by the people in November, will give
to the Sixty-second congress a mem
precedent. He has already seriously
been considered for the speakership,
while not member of the house.
That was one of the compromises
strongly urged at the time of the in
surgent outbreak in the spring. He
has long made a speciality of parlia-
mentary law, and has compiled a work
OF encyclopedia proportions. repre-
senting the study of years, on the
precedent of the national house of
representatives. Singularly enough,
the initiative for this publication
came from the Democrats. It gave
such an advantage to the speaker to
have these precedents card catalogued
and otherwise Immediately available
that the Democratic leaders came for
ward to ask why they should not have
access to the same information, too.
This led to the agreement to publish
the result of Mr.. Kinds researches.
To suppose that these are merely of
interest to students of parliamentary
manuals would be great mistake. A
proper understanding of it is often
the basis of intelligent legislative pro-
cedure.
Not ten men in the next house will
be better known to its general MEM
bership than Mr.. Kinds. He will be
one of the recognized leaders on
his first day there, because he has
been in intimate consultation with it's
speakers and committees on rules for
more than twenty years, and more
than once his advice has guided the
action of his party. In the assign
ment of committee places, while he
cannot now have any of the chair
manships which are regularly filled on
the seniority basis, he will be regarded
as decidedly "privileged'' among the
new members. Though the speaker
ship Is an extraordinary honor, and
primarily represents capacity for po-
litical leadership rather than acquaint-
ance with parliamentary law, it would
not be surprising if Mr.. Kinds should
reach that Office before many years,
and thereby make the First Names
second contribution to it within
comparatively short period. The
house seems to be getting ready ito
repose most of the party strategy
with its elective Committees on rules
assuming this new system to stand
and to seek in the speakership to
emphasize the qualities of a presiding
officer. This tendency, if maintained,
is pretty sure to bring Mr.. Kinds to
that great Office. He is a man of gen.
eral scholarship, has been considered
for the presidency of one of the Maine
colleges, is an effective speaker. we'll
versed in national issues, and pos
sesses the courage of his convictions.
In sending him to congress the First
Maine district will be making a rather
notable choice.-Boston Evening Trans
script.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

Geological in nature and, however they
may issue in practice. they leave the
scientific and technical problems of
conservation of natural resources to be
solved on their own basis. And these
solutions must be fundamentally much
the same under any political or socio-
logical system.
$50 obvious is all this that it can
only be careless lapse into confusion
of thought, or else wilful perversion
of what is legitimate in the arts of
persuasion, for an advocate of political
or sociological measures to glide with
out a note of warning from a conser-
vational premise which commands uni
versaI assent to a political conclusion
respecting ownership or distribution of
values which has no logical relation
to conservation. and may even be i'm
compatible with It's highest realization.
In recent months we have perhaps
seen such arguments for true conserva-
ton. Fallacies usually reveal them
selves in the end and hurt the cause
in behalf OF which they are urged,
and these perversions must ultimately
stand in the way of the wisest provl-
sions for the distribution of natural
values in behalf of which they are
putativeiy invoked. No class Of men
bear a more urgent commission to
keep the currents OF thought clear and
ethical respecting our natural re-
sources than biologists for, more than
any others, they have, as a matter of
history, been the fathers of the real
conservation movement. Hence this
note on the untoward set OF a sinister
cairrernf
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Just as soon as most people get out
of debt they proceed to get in again.
y y
Flirting will have a good deal to
answer for. Much of it ends In matri-
mony.
Individuals who are free at offering
their services are not very good work
ers, generally.
If people only talked about the
things on which they. are fully in
formed there would be much less con-
versation.
Some women who really haven't
anything to worry about. fret continu-
ally over the possibility OF their houses
being visited by burglars.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
( romance-our true love runs

bit of romance-our true love runs
SO smooth 1880
I'm sure don't know what you
meant" Milicent retorted, trying to
free her hands.
MOP" he said, his eyes Laughing
and incredulous. you don't. know
that by loving each other we please
the finest pair in the worid-and in
herit a million?'
Let go my hands! I-I-won't
listeni" Milicent burst out.
He caught her in his arms-there
upon his breast she told him every
thing lending abjectly: Please, please
let me go away before you tell the old
folk. They have been so good to me
l can't bear to see their eyes full of
contempt
But must tell them" Arden pro-
tested. And at once. Foolish lktle
girl, do you think 1 shall let you go,
no matter what your name Isl"
ITS like fairy tale come true,''
Lily, the real Lily, said three weeks
later; but she was no longer Lily
Haughton. She had come to Glen
vile in convoy of her new husband.
Jimmy Page, artist.
Jimmy held out against me until
he saw what cook / was, in camp
Lily ran on. 1--WE been trying for a
year to make him propose-now all
of US will live happy ever after
(Copyrighted 1910 by Associated Lit
erary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
A FIsHIN,.

A FTSHIN'.
Set in my boat fishin'
While the world goes rollin' on,
Mighty hard to keep from wishin'
For the day to quickly dawn,
When kin say-OP worid-go to-
For I've had all want o. you;
I'm goin a fishin'.
Tired o. watchin' men a scrappin'
Til their hearts grow hard an cold,
Trytn, to ketch their neighbors nappin';
Heapfn up their bonds an gold.
want to say-OP world-go to
I'm gettin' mighty sick o. you;
I'm goin' a fishin'.
Tryin' hard to make a shown!
Toilin'. early. toilin' late;
Always feelin'. almost KNOWN,
Twon't be long at any rate.
Till kin say-OP world-go to-
For amt nothin else to do;
I'm goin' fishin'
w. w. Wycoff, in the Cutters Book.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers OF the State Journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
20 any address at the rate OF ten cents
n week or thirty cents a month tby
mail onIy.) Address changed as often
as desired. While out OF town the
State Journal viii be to you like a
daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, TO save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

A comprehensive set of suggestions
has been issued nv the Topeka Motor
league directing automobile drivers to
be free with the use of signals when
they start their machines or travel
slong streets which are crowded with
pedestrians. Now if the automobiles
will only heed these suggestions it
swon't be necessary for the ordinary
plug citizen who has to walk on his
way to continue his training in the art
OF acrobatics so he can Just manage
to to flip or hop out of the way of APP
a,Paachfng motor cars.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

Norway is discerning. It's government
does not recognize that anything like
a state of war exists in Nicaragua. AS
near as can be figured from the con-
fiicting dispatches from the Banana
Republic the generals of the opposing
forces have been emulating for many
months the farfamed king of France,
who marched his men the hill up and
then marched them down again Some
times they exchange salute or two
as they pass by, but that appears to
be about all,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

pubIicans and Beveridge Republicans.
Yes, yes, it. is all true enough, and
then. on the other hand. we have
northern Democrats, southern Demo-
Gratis, Jeffersonian Democrats, Bryan
Democrats, Roosevelt Democrats, re-
dictionary Democrats, democratic
Democrats. Hearst Democrats, silver
Democrats. gold Democrats, hered-
itary Democrats and Tammanyites.'
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

The Smiths must be feeling pretty
sore these days. Their reputation for
university has received a severe blow.
Chicago's new directory shows that
that there are 5000 more Johnsons than
Smiths in that town
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19

Money i@ needed. the small sum Of
$1A, to pay for the memorial which
has been erected at the entrance of
Gage park in honor Mr.. and Mrs. G.
q. Gage who presented this magnih-
cent recreation resort to the people OF
Topeka. 1t ought to be Forthcoming
through popular subscription before an
other week has passed.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-19
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
rFrom the New York Press.l

rFrom the New York Press.
A strait jacket is the best aid to
self-control for most people.
A girl will refuse a man and still
want to hold an option on him.
A man will seem to be able to run
faster and longer after a public job
than after salvation.
When a girl will. take her mothers
advice against a man. it's sign she
doesn't like him anyhow.
The less success man makes with
his business the madden he gets with
his family for thinking 80.