davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
A BUNCH OF HELPFUL HOWS.
Ready Reference Series That May
Come Handy Any Time.

Come Handy Any Time.
HOw to Keep Out of Jail.-A COM
pendulum of useful information
for busy magnates. giving the
nature Of %sribpoenas, congressional
probes. immunity baths (hot and cold
and bold fronts. Not only contains d.
rections for taking a (trust) bust
measure. but tells lucky numbers, fore
casts the fine days Of the year and
points out the criminal consequences
Of misappropriating tonly) a few paltry
plunks. Appendix includes the ad-
dresses of the highest priced lawyers
and the quickest routes to Europe and
Canada.
How to Break Into the Best Society.
An abridged (whist) edition for
climbers. Tells you how to be intro
duced properly to big money, how to
conduct yourself when 1t is talking,
how to enter a room when It is pres.
ent, how TO detect the odor of burn
ing money and how to "call" On easy
money. Tells the name of the one you
will divorce. Profusely illustrated
with 23.456 designs Of family crests;
can be made to your measure and ft-
ted right at home.
How to Be a Perfect Lady.-A con-
densed guide to ballistics for ladies';
full explanations how to hold a brick
bat. how to poise it gracefully and
how by hurting it to d~isarrange the
stolid British stare of a cabinet min
lister. Polite hints on smashing win
dows. How to have your cling with
%(stepping) stones Ito PRISON.. What not
to year in Jail. Simple lessons in dis.
couraging the unwelcome attentions of
policemen. Our method insures per-
feet results.
How to Keep a Cook.-The book you
will eventually buy. Contains the
green book of the Registered Lady
Cooks Of America. A brief synopsis Of
the bylaws Of organized cookery.
Formulates the latest demand Of a liv-
ing wage for angels in the kitchen
Qife size). including the use Of the
family automobile, old age pensions
for cook and dependent kinsfolk. daily
shopping tours, the opera box on "Sa-
lone" nights and the privilege Of at
tending s%uffragette lectures at Marble
House. Tells under what circumstances
cooks may be allowed to give monkey
dinners to their friends without in
fringing on the essentials Of good soci-
ETY.. A manual Of authorized converse
ton with the angel approved by the
union). Our book contains $4,000 fancy
designs of imported domestics, actual
colors, shades to suit, faces cut prin-
cess with graduated founces.
How to Take a Flier.-The up to date
book on aerial etiquette. What every
high fier should know. Explains
with diagrams) the dangers Of taking
a drop too much" when the airship
gets "tipsy," what to do when you
strike a hard cloud, how to avoid air
sickness. how to keep your machine
tuned up" to the music Of the
spheres. Complete instructions for
making a hit when the ship collapses.
Outlines the best method Of buying a
$4,000 dirigible at 3 cents a week.
Glossary Of latest list Of Eighty fads.
An air directory for airish people,
Life,
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
NOVEL POWER BOAT.
Tubular High Speed Cstamaran Motor
Craft Of Light Draft.

Tubular High Speed Cstamaran Motor
Craft Of Light Draft.
A novel tubular power boat which
draws only two inches without load
and three inches with several passen-
gers has been constructed by William
S. Reed Of GAINESVILLE. Wis. 1t has a
speed Of eighteen miles per hour when
operated by a gasoline motor of only
Fix horsepower capacity.
The boat consists of two cigar shaped
tubes measuring a trife less than one
foot in diameter. On the tubes a plat
form fourteen feet long is mounted
which has a railing of tubing with
paraffin coated canvas sides and ends,
secured by n molding at the bottom
and hooks on the railing.
The platform on which the engine is
mounted is three and a half feet wide
and is made Of matched flooring. The
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05

tunate English aviator. the Hon. @. 8.
Rolls. who later met his death at
Bournemouth.
To make the feat still more surpris-
ing. Mr.. Moissant was not familiar
with the geography Of his course. He
had never been in England and was
obliged to rely entirely on the CON-
pass, while the crossing of the chan
mel was accomplished in the teeth of
a strong westerly wind.
MI. Moissant, who is thirty-1ve
years Of age, is Of slight build. He
first visited Paris some months ago
and became interested in the study of
aviation. He had two machines built
after his W designs and found the
subject so fascinating that he deter
mined to become a practical air man.
Another notable performance in avi-
alton was that of Clifford B. Harmon
recently. who few over Long Island
sound from Garden City to Greenwich.
Conn.,. winning a silver trophy aud
everlasting fame as an aviator. 1t
was a daring feat. undertaken on the
spur Of the moment and not without a
hint Of recklessness, for the flying ma
chine was not provided with p%ontoons.
the aviator wore a heavy leather coat
which would have hampered him
greatly If he had been cast into the
middle of the sound, and a stiff breeze
was blowing, which was in the air
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
To Biacken liaht Woods.

To blacken light woods make a prep
aration of an ounce Of borax. dissolved
in q quart Of water. with two ounces
Of shellac. The liquid is then to be
boiled until a perfect solution is OBJ
tanned, then stir in two teaspoonfuls
Of glycerin and complete by adding
a suficiency Of soluble aniline black
to completely darken the liquid. which
will now be ready for use.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05

S"A IVA COuuO0uI u SuCe
cess. Among the others who are ex-
pected t swim the channel In Septem-
Der are Montague Holbein, who in 1907
was almost across when he had to
give up. and Captain Hoey Of New
Zealand. The latter has been training
for months for the trip, and great
things are expected Of him. At least
one woman will also try for the chan
mel honors in September. She is Miss
Lily Smith Of London, who has won
score of medals for her feats In the
water.
fish channel can have no idea Of what
It "a to swim it. Its peculiar and
dangerous tides quickly exhaust the
swimmer and make the feat almost an
impossible one. Webb In making the
trip was in the water over twenty
one hours, while It took Boyton in his
pneumatic suit something like twenty.
i've hours.
The chief attraction In the Ameri-
can league, outside Of the battle for
the pennant, is the Lajoie-Cobb bat
ting feud. and fans the country "
are intensely interested in the out
come. Here is how Eddie Plank. who
ranks as n Of the shrewdest stu
dents Of batsmen In the league. COM
pares the two men:
"Lajoie hits anything, inside, out
side. high or low. over the plate, and
it Is almost impossible to pitch and
fool him. Stick n close to bis belt
and be will crash 1t over the tnfeld,
mayhap to the fence. Drop one low
and be will hit 1t a mile. Around his
shoulders he will do the same thing.
Groove one and it is suicide. l never
try to outguess Lajoie, for I admit
that I have nothing With which I can
fool him. l simply take my chance
and confess that be Is my superior.
The easiest time to pitch to the big
fellow is when there are men on the
bases. He does not hit then as he
does when the pillows are empty.
1.-TWO years ago In Cleveland I was
trying to waste a ball. He hit It a
lick with his bat and knocked 1t over
the roof Of q building out Of the
grounds. l pushed him one in the last
series with the Maps inside and down
around his knees. He bounced It to
left field. That's the reason l pitch
to Larry and hope for luck. You can't
0utguess him.
with Ty Cobb it is different. al.
though Ty a hit anything that Is
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
HIRAM w. JOHNSON,

The "~lnsuresnt" Named by California
Republicans For Governor.
The nomination recently Of Hiram
W. johnson as the Republican candi-
date for governor Of California proved
beyond q doubt that the Golden State
Is "insurgent" in its Republican pol
itics, the nominee being an out and
out progressive" Mr.. johnson is a
young and vigorous man. in some Of
his attitudes not unlike ex-President
Roosevelt. though he is smooth shaven
and several years his Junior. He used
to be the city attorney of Sacramento,
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
$$$$$$
How the :
ANdtOrS Are
Succeeding

"HE query used to he, when
will the aviators do some
thing?" Today we ask, "What
will they do nextf" For al
most every day the bird men perform
some new and marvellous feat in the
air and successfully complete a jour-
ney that was thought to be impos-
sible. One Of the most talked Of tri-
umphs in aviation just now is the trip
made by John B. Molssant Of Chicago.
who with a passenger few across the
English channel. By this achievement
he far surpassed the feats of Messrs.
Bleriot. De Lesseps and the unfor-
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
Given His Choice.

A man who had been pressed into
carrying golf clubs and knew abso-
lutely nothing about the game was
asked by his employer:
"What should l take for this shot
an iron. mashie or cleek?"
ANY you like. sir" was the reply
''any you like. They all belong to
you."-Tit.B Bits.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
The Fate Of Genius,

The Fate Of Genius.
"Sir," began the poet impressively.
II am seeking an outlet for my pen.
"Have you ever tried the kitchen
sink? 2" asked the busy editor as he
blue penciled all but one paragraph of
a column story turned in by a cub re-
porter.-Birmingham Age-Herald.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
WORKING the BOYS.

II can't get my boy to do anything
around the house."
I'VE have settled that problem. My
son runs errands for my neighbor. and
her boy runs errands for me- Kansas
City Journal.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
WALKING FOR HEALTH.

Remarkable Pedestrian Feat Of q Doc.
tor and His Wife.
If you're fat, walk to reduce your
weight; If you're thin. walk to in
G your weight. This Is the
strange health hint furnished the
country recently by Dr.. D. H. Woolf
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
Sea Water Cement.

The result of tests made by a large
engineering firm recently to test the
effect OF sea water on cement sand
mortar showed that the water reduces
its tensile strength.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
The Fashionable Camp,

"And how did you like rough life liz
the A~dirondacks. Cholly?"
ut wasn't bad fun. We drank the
champagne u Of tin cups."-Louis.
Vile Courier journal.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
What the :
Sportsmen Are
Discussing F:
was thirty

1T was thirty.
five years ago
that Captains
Webb and Boy
ton swan the Eng
lish channel, and
since then all who
have attempted it
have failed. Now,
however, 1t looks
as II the feat was
to be duplicated,
as many of the
worlds greatest
swimmers are to
attempt the peril
ous trip. Among
them is Jabez
Wolfe, who up to
date has come
closer to swim.
ming the distance
than any other
man alive. He will
start the latter
part of September
and this time is
of sue.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
TT COBB IN ACTION.

II COBB N ACTION.
thrown to him. However. he is not 80
hard for me to pitch to. perhaps be-
cause he is q left hand batter and La.
3ode q right. You can fool the 0eor.
gian where you cannot the French.
man. When ! am pitching against De-
tSoit ! take . chance with Cobb. and
sometimes I a outguess him. al
though ! admit his ability al a bats.
man. He didn't get q hit OF me in .
Tecent game"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
A Conscientious Declaration

n C"onsclentiouS OecTaratIon.
Drummer-Will you be mine? All
my life l will worship you from Feb
ruary until April and from August
until December. The rest Of the time
I am on the road. -Fliegende Batter.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05

mans favor only In the last lap Of his
journey from Larchmont eastward to
Greenwich. His speed was almost q
mile a minute aud was sometimes
faster than that.
These feats spell progress in the air.
They stimulate expert enthusiasm not
less than public interest. Seemingly
the approach il being all at once ex-
pedited Of the day for the flying ma.
chine to come into its own mess7re
Of real practical utility.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-10-05
Before and Altar.

"They had a runaway marriage
didn't they"
Eyes, and walkahOme return"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
An Eyo on tho Future.

A man with swollen finger that
had a deep abrasion under the ring
called at a jewelry store to get the
ring cut off. Before the operation was
begun he said:
Can this ring he mended so pawn
broker will give me the usual amount
on it?'
1T can be mended." said the jeweler,
but doubt if you can ever persuade
q pawnbroker to accept it afterward."
"Then l guess I'll take chances on
my finger getting well with the ring
on" said the young man and left the
store.
"Incidents like that" said the jewel
er, "show what a surprisingly large
number Of Philadelphians live with
the pawnshop looming up just ahead
of them as an unavoidable evil. OF all
the people who need their rings cut of
two-thirds Of them ask that very ques-
ton, and a large percentage of them
take chances on blood poisoning rather
than destroy the rings value as a
pawnable asset" -Philadelphia Ledger.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Elizabethan SIanq.

According to the latest edition OF
Websters Dictionary. one meaning of
lobster" is "a gullible. awkward. bun
Cling or undesirable fellow" This
meaning is supposed by most persons
to be a modern development of slang,
However. lobster" was favorite term
of abuse among Englishmen of Queen
Elizabeth's day, and Shakespeare may
have denounced his callboy as a
lobster" when the boy failed to at
tend to his duties. Some students of
the word think it probably was applied
first to men with red faces. AS signi
flying a soldier the term lobster is as
old as Cromwell's day. Lord Claren-
den, historian of the civil war in Eng
land. explains that it was applied to
the Roundhead cuirassiers because of
the bright iron shells with which they
were covered. Afterward British SOL
diers In their red uniforms were called
HOLSTERS" Then came another develop
ment The soldier in the red coat be-
came a "boiled lobster" while the po-
liceman in blue was. Of course. an
"unboiled" or raw lobster" Again.
ito boil a lobster was for a man to
enlist in the army and put on q red
coat.-Chicago News.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
How Romans Took Their Food.


The Romans rec!ined at their ban
quets on couches. all supporting them
selves on one elbow and eating with
their fingers from dishes placed in the
center Of, the table. Each was sup
piled with napkin, and knives were
used, though it does not appear that
every one was supplied with one.
Nothing. it would seem, could be more
fatiguing than to partake of repast
in such an awkward posture or less
conductive to neatness, it being almost
impossible to keep the hands clean
even with water supplied by the slaves
or to prevent the food and wine from
falling on the clothing and the draper
les of the couch. This manner of eat
ing disappeared during the dark ages
so far as the couch was concerned,
but the popularity of taking food with
the fingers from common dish con-
tinued afterward for more than 1000
years.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Thu littIe Word "Yes,"

Eyes, is simple word spelled with
three letters
1t has caused more happiness and
more unhappiness than any other word
in the language.
1t has lost more money for easy lend
ers than all the holes in all the pock-
cts in the world.
1t has started more dipsomaniacs on
their careers than all the strong liquor
on earth.
1t has caused more fights than all the
you're liars" that ever were spoken.
It has procured kisses and provoked
blows.
1t has defeated candidates and elect
ed scoundrels.
1t has been used in more lies than
any other expression. =
1t is not meant half the time it is
said.
Will it continue to make such
record?
Yes.-Life.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Tho Inspirino Baupipes.

It was at seaside resort. and along
the board walk came marching a band
OF highland bagpipers in full costume.
They were tremendous fellows, but
their music. TO my untutored ears, was
like the squealings Of forty stuck pigs.
Yet have never heard strains to CON-
pare with theirs for arousing a desire
to die for ones country. l think bag
pipe music must have been fashioned
back in the old days by some demon Of
perversity out Of the whistle Of ar
rows. the clash Of claymores, the neigh
ing of war steeds and the shrieks Of
the dying. When hear it think Of
the wheel Of fortune. the car of Jug
gernaut. the mills Of the gods and the
inquisitorial rack and screw. 1t
whirls along with a cyclonic rhythm
that sets the feet to tramping and the
blood to boiling. Robert NJ. Gay in At
lantic.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Wouldn't Deliver,

he was born in Dublin and lived in
Ireland until about two months ago,
when he came to Cleveland. Then he
began to look around for job. The
manager of a furniture house prom
Used to give him trial.
Come around in the morning and go
to work." he said. land if you can de-
liver the goods We'll probably keep
you permanently"
The Dublin native went over to tell
his cousin about it. He confded to
him that he didn't believe he'd go back
to take the job, after all.
''They want me to deliver the
goods he said. ''"Think Of going
around delivering big, heavy furniture.
That's what horses and wagons are
for in my country."-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
He Wanted ia Know.

There was Il small crowd at the soda
counter when tall man rushed in and
pushed an empty bottle over the drug
counter.
Acid" he whispered. excitedly.
''Ten cents worth Of acid, and quick!'
The soda water crowd began to sit
up and take notice.
"What's he going to do with that
acid" demanded one.
Its secret" answered the drug
clerk.
Nothing unusual. hope"
swell. rather"
what! You mean to say he is 60
ing to take that acid?"
"Oh. no! Listen. There is a silver
wedding at his house tonight. and he
Is going to test the presents as fast as
his friends bring them in"
And then and there they voted him
the meanest man in town.-Chicago
News.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Harvard University.

Harvard university derives its name
from Rev. John Harvard, it's earliest
beDefactor. who in 1858 bequeathed
One-half Of his estate, amounting to
$500, for the endowment of the college.
Harvard hall was built in 1865. Hol-
worthy hall of brick in 1872 and Hollis
hall, also Of brick. in 1764. Stoughton
hall. being Of the same dimensions and
material as Hollis. was built in 1904.
and d writer Of 1917 states that Its
appearance is somewhat in the modern
STYLE"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Some Useful Knots;
How to Tie Them.
knowledge Frequently of Great
Value to the Farmer,
!. !. \ ! !. !. !. !. !. i. !. J. j. !. !

Among the exhibits of the School of
Agriculture, at the Minnesota State
Fair, was one showing the method of
tying various knots in rope, useful in
the emergencies of the farm; also the
method of splicing ropes. These are
among the practical arts acquired by
the student at the school. A ready
knowledge of them may not infre.
quently enable the farmer to save
hours of time, or the possible loss of
some valuable animal, or even a hui.
man life. Among the knots are the
following:
THE WEAVER'S KNOT,
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
What He Admired.

"What did father say when you ask
ed him for my handw
"Oh," replied Augustus, ''he-he did
his best to be pleasant. He said there
was something about me that he real
~ admired"
ibid he say what?'
"Yes; my impudence."
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Sure Thinu,

$50 Jack and Tom proposed last
night. Which did you accept?''
why. my dear. was so excited
can't remember But whichever calls
tonight must be the ."-Spokane
Spokesman
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
A Pointer to Others.

He-Going to marry the rich Jack
Hammond? Why. thought he had
thrown all his money to the dogs. She
SO he did, but they turned out to be
retrievers.-London Nj. A. P.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
The Convenient Excuse,

Hard luck is generally the name peo-
pie give to the thing that happens
when they have been acting foolishly.
Chicago Record Herald. -
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
!. !. !. \ i. !. !. + !. < !. + !. !.

Glover supplies humus and
nitrogen to the soil. Both of
these are essential to sarisfac-
tory plant growth. Glover is
so valuable a farm crop that
the Minnesota Experiment Sta
ton always suggests raising it
on new land, and growing it
regularly in rotation with
grain, corn, root crops and
potatoes. Aside from it's ben
efits to the soil while grow
ing, it is the best roughage for
stock, and the manure result
ing from such feeding is the
most valuable of fertilizers.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30

The last ration is the most expen.
sive one because of the introduction
of oil meal, which costs nearly 2 cents
per pound. The ration is suggested
especially for this year, because in
many cases, owing to the drouth,
there is very little clover to feed, and
the ingredients are apportioned. to
COMPENSATE for the ahsence OF clover.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30
Sum-.

His Sun.
Mrs. Buggins-Before we were mar
ried you used to say I was the sun
shine of your life. Mr.. Buggins-W Well,
I admit that you still do your best to
make things hot for me.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1910-09-30

Laughing cheerfulness throws sun
light on all the paths of life.-Richter.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1910-10-27
ADVERTISED LETTERS.

Mail for the following named per-
sons remain uncalled for in the Post
Officeat j.ynden, Wash. If not called
for in two weeks it will be sent to II
dead letter office.
Geo. Baer.
L. A. Dixon. -
Miss Laia Jones.
Mrs. Jennie Lindstrom.
Won Long.
D. II. Menser.
Nictla Coruso.
Harry ]. Wilson.
Robert O'Nell, P. NJ.
W. R. c. NOTES.
Our treasurer Nancy Palmer being
absent, Sister Randall filled the vacan
cy.
We are sorry our color bearer can
not attend more regularly.
Wednesday. the 10Th goodly
number of ladies met at their hall
and served for Sister Van Patten.
Saturday evening a number of the
w. r. c. ladies together with their
neighbors and friends gathered at the
home Of Cora McSarley to help cele-
brate the goth anniversary of her
wedding. Music and a social chat
was the diversion Of the evening. Mrs
McSorley was presented with a beaut
full salad set and a lovely plate as
| a token Of remembrance and esteem
A delicious lunch was served.
At ournext meeting the inspector
will be here: let US havea good atten.
dance. Dinner will be served at the
hall on that day. :.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1910-10-27

An apron shower was given to Mrs.
P. A. Clarke, of North Prairie Octo-
Der 18th. A very enjoyable time was
spent. q aprons were given.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1910-10-27

Mr.and Mrs B. Johanson visited wit
Mr.. and Mrs. o. Fredricson at the old
Baldwin place Sunday.