The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-09-06
SWEET MAID!
Don't Ever Acquire the Fatal Habit of
 Eating Needles
l By Bill \

l EutiuB Nccuics
 By Bill Nye.
 From the London Lancet we learn that many years ago a case was re- corded by Dr. Otto of Copenhag gen in which 495 needles rassed through the skin of a hysterical girl, who had prob ably swallowed them during a hysteri- cal paroxysm. but these all emerged from the regions below the diaphragm, and were collected in groups which gave rise to infiammatory swellings of some size. One of these contained 100 needles. Quite recently pr. Bigger de- scribed before the society of surgery of Dublin a case in which more than 300 needles were removed from the body Of woman. It is very remarkable in how few cases the needles were the cause of death. and how slight an in | reference with function their presence and movement cause" | It would seem, from the cases on | record, that needles in the system rath- CT assist in the digestion and promote | longevity.
 For instance, we will suppose that the hysterical girl above alluded to, with 495 needles in her stomach, should absorb the midsummer cucumber Think how interesting those needles would make it for the great collie pro- moter!
 We can imagine the cheerful smile of the cucumber as 1t enters the stomach, and, lowing cheerfully to the follicles standing around. hangs its hat upon the walls of the stomach stands it's umbrella in corner and proceeds to get in it's work.
 All at once the cucumber looks sur prised and grieved about something. It stops In its heaven-born collie genera tion, and pulls a rusty needle out of it's person. Maddened by the pain, it once more attacks the digestive apparatus. and once more accummulates a choice job lot of needles.
 Again and again it enters into the un- equal contest, each time losing ground and gaining ground, till the poor cu- cumber, with assorted hardware stick ing out in all directions, like the hair on a cats tail, at last curls up like caterpillar, and yields up the victory. Still, this needle business will be ex- pensive to husbands, if wives once &C., quire the habit and allow it to obtain the mastery over them. If wife once permits this demon appetite for cambric needles to get con- trol of the house, it will soon secure majority in the senate, and then there will be trouble.
 The woman who once begins to tam- per with cambric needles is not safe. She may think that she has power to control her appetite, but it is only a step to the maddening thirst for the soul destroying darning- needle, and, perhaps. to the button-hook and carpet stretcher.
 It is safer and better to crush the first desire for needles, than, when it is too late, to undertake reformation from the abject slavery to this hellish thirst
 We once knew sweet young crea- ture, with dewy eye and breath like timothy hay. Her merry laugh rippled out upon the summer air like the 1oy- full music of bald-headed bobolinks.
 Everybody loved her, and she loved everybody. too. But in a thoughtless
 
 needle. This did not satisfy her. The cruel thraldom had begun. Whenever she felt depressed and gloomy, there was nothing that would kill her ennui and melancholy but the fatal needle cushion.
 From this she rapidly became more reckless, till there was hardly an hour that she was not under the influence of needles.
 If she couldn't get needles to as- suage her mad thirst, she would take hair-pins or doorkeys. She gradually pined away to a mere skeleton. She could no longer sit on one foot and be happy.
 Life for her was filled with opaque gloom and sadness At last she took an overdose of sheep shears and monkey wrenches one day, and on the follow ing morning her soul had lit out for the land of eternal summer We should learn from this to shun the maddening needle-cushion as we would a viper, and never tell lie.