davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
The Question of Church Unity

U. P. Morgans gift of s10o,0OO last Oc- tober to promote the cause of Christian unity seems to be well appreciated by in this country and England" said a layman.
 While this large donation was made through the general convention of the Episcopal church, to which MT. Morgan was delegate, it is of equal interest to all Christian denominations.
 "The unity movement has not taken definite shape, and 1t may yet be two or three years before plans crystalize or before a worldwide conference is even called 10 discuss the question in a formal way; but quiet educational work is going on through the press, both secular and religious, and I sincerely trust that there will be practical results
 "A most enlightening discussion is in progress in the columns of the New York Sun. An EpiscopalIan of Brooklyn, who signs himself ID. D. LL D. contributes an article to The Sun from time to time, and his last letter In Mondays Sun is especially interesting, for he gives in short space some idea of various recent ly expressed views of Anglicans and oth- CTS on unity. That writer, after referring to the published remarks of Cardinal Gib- bons and Dr. Gore, Anglican bishop of Birmingham, England, the former hoping that some day all Christians will find their way into the Catholic fold, and the latter holding that there cannot possibly be church with episcopacy' says: "'On the other hand, Canon Hanson, the popular rector of St. Margaret's, Westminster, affirms, that bishop Is not absolutely necessary for a church, and es- pecially for a national church, and he says that such was the view of Dr. Ar hold of Rugby. Dr. Wordsworth, bishop of Salisbury, very decided High Church | bishop of the English Church, says he
 considers that the generous gift of $100,- 600 at the recent general convention at Cincinnati. in order to promote church unity, was one of the most notable fea- lures of the convention and that the
 whole question of Christian unity must
 be considered from more liberal point of view than that of any party in the English Or American Episcopal churches In Scotland they are making a deter mined effort to unite the National Pres. byterian Church with the Free Church Lord Rosebery has written letter in which he says that all the Presbyterian
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
LIPTON ON ADVERTISING

From the Louisville Courior-Journal
 Sir Thomas Lipton, the great tea mer- chant, puts the matter of advertising in a netshell. He says: "Given an idea little capital, industry and the ability to advertise, and no man ought to dIe poor" He practiced what he preached
 Soon after he started in business the city of Glasgow was surprised to see seven of the very thinnest men walking solemnly in Indian file through the streets bearing on their backs posters reading: I've are going to Lipton's." In the after noon the people understood what they had seen in the morning. For in the after noon seven of the fattest men in the country waddled happily along through the same streets with another poster saying: we have been to Lipton's."
 Some years ago Thomas Lipton was a passenger on an East India steamer car rying a cargo of tea. A furious storm arose and the ship was driven far out of its course in the Red sea. The peril was so great 1t become necessary to throw overheard a great part of the cargo. Lipton saw what was about to be done. Suddenly he rushed away from the scene, speedily returned and set viz orcusly to work with a stencil, a paint brush and pot of black paint. He pro- ceeded at once to label each chest and box before it was cast overheard with the words: Use Lipton's Teas" Of course, the cargo was afterward picked up on various shores and floating in various seas and served to bring the merchant into his first prominence abroad. The boat was lost. but crew and passengers were saved. Everywhere the story went. Within week Liptons name was in every continental newspaper and ho was the best advertised man in the British isles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
THE OAF AT THE PLAY

figure in Miss Crother's play, "A Mans World Is asked by friend why she has never married, and replies. with bowed head, No one ever asked me- it was evi- dent that the audience was perfectly captivated by the joke.
 There are persons with immature or undeveloped minds, who are quite. incap- able of understanding "The Easiest Way" which is nothing if not tragic, although no blood is shed. This is ap- parent to anyone who has observed the behavior of an audience sitting through the play in maudlin sympathy with the erring girl. firmly convinced that if mar riage isn't the climax that Is the fault of bungling writer of plays, and not the fault of the unberoic heroine who bungled her life. It is doubtless true that not few of the immature see in the climax the solution of the vexed problem of the young woman, viewing the project ed trip to Rector's merely as a leap from labyrinth of difficulties too baf- fling to be longer contended with.
 The coarse guffaw that greeted the poignant admission of the miniature painter in "A Man'c world' when the play was presented in Louisville, was duplicated elsewhere. It came from the minority, of course, but it iI- lustrated in an irritating manner the ut ter inability of certain portion of a thing more subtle than slap-stick com edey or blood and thunder melodrama. Since the fact must be admitted. what arc the causes?
 HfcrH sff1fo son. who ought to be at home when plays of a certain type are offered is not much of a noise maker, expressing inability to understand by smiles rather than by audible laughter. Equally immature young persons not So nice roar their con fession of immaturity from the gallery and elsewhere, marring the play. The two elements in the audience can hardly be eliminated Failure to understand is by no means confined to boys and girls. The matured oaf for whose improvement there is no hope is always in evidence. His point of view represents in part. no, doubt the effect produced by constantly attending musical comedy, burlesqus. fiappant farce and coarse vaudeville in which cynicism and brutality are the common factors by which comedy is produced To certain authors of plays, and ''books' for musical plays, nothing is serious nothing is sacred, and noth- ing that Is clean Is humorous. Persons fed upon the mental pabulum they pur- vey develop deteriorated sense of humor which enables them to enjoy a laugh at the pathetic picture made by the minia- ture painter in Miss Crothers' play, con fessing her reason for attempting a ca- reer.
 There is no means of getting rid of the nuisance such persons constitute when they stray into a theatre to see show" and find play that Is without a meaning to them. Persons of intelli- gence must grin and bear 1t. The oaf who laughs at the wrong time we shall always have with us Censure cannot drive him away. and police supervision of amusement places cannot suppress the yI-fiy,,ad r,,irth of the harren SDectatOr.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

just as long as the fee system is permit ted to exist.
 A prosperous, progressive state cannot afford to retain the fee system, and the people expect the coming legislature to disregard the rings from sheriffs to county superintendents of education, and to re- lieve the state of a system that is not for one moment defensible.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
NOVEMBER FIRST

By Wordsworth. . How clear. how keen, how marvelously
 bright ..5..-s.,- The effluence from you distant noun
 tains head a1 Which, strewn with snow smooth as the
 sky can shed, Shines like another sun-on mortal sight Uprisen, as If to check approaching night. And all her twinkling stars. Who now
 would tread, f7 If so he might. you mountains glitterins
 head : Terrestrial, but a surface, by the N'-f +. Of sad mortality's eartk-s4bsans Tleg. Unswept, unstained? 1er stsail the aei-sai
 powers .asy.
 Dissolve that beauty, aestlne1 tc s4dAre. White, radiant. spotlefs eae'lsts pera. Through all vicissitudes 1i'l feaial spring Has filled the laughirz .ss w.fa wei~
 come flowers.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

holc the ordinance constitutional if 1t be necessary to the maintenance of law and order in a community.
 The Baltimore ordinance is no doubt unique in American municipalities. It is sul gereis. But it nevertheless makes for peace in city and there is every reason to believe it will be found both constl- tutional and practicable, and therefore de- sirab
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
 If you want the most cheerful com panion pick money to be 1t.
 When a woman's children are her jew els they cost just the same.
 A woman's text for letter is pen. ink. paper and a postage stamp.
 Optimism is being able to keep on hop Ing after proof that you are fool to do it.
 It's just superstition that a man learns to be a good fisherman by being great liar; that's the way he really learns not to be.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
J1rsr TO RrM1ND yor1

JUST TO REMIND YOU. Right now's the time to loosen up And let your heart so be, That no more selfishness may Turk In any nook. Set free All gentle thoughts and scatter smiles, Till sorrow fades away And all the world lifts up a song To welcome Christmas Day. There's no room now for wights who
 frown,
 Or go forth with a scowl: But little good 1t does to whine And even less to growl. The cheery people reign supreme At this time of the year; Old Santa Claus is on the way And-gosh!-he'll soon be here.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

LYING IN WATT. Where Christmas shoppers squirm, Where tides of traffic throb, The glad monia germ Is once more on the job. ACCORDING TO THE PAPERS. Listen to the tinkle
 Of my little verse; - Nothing ever happens
 To a home1y nurse.
 Birmingham Herald. And, no doubt you've noted, Homely though they be, Actresses get hold of Hands across the sea.
 Syracuse Herald. DOESN'T SEEM NATURAL Here's a new kind of magazine story"
 'In what way?- "A village storekeeper is introduced who doesn't say, Dog my catsr"
 DOING TIME, MAYBE. A chap who had one mate at home And took another wife, Has lately ceased the world to roam And leads an indoor life.
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
A CANNoNADE OF CANS. :.

From the Boston Evening Transcript.
 Madam" he began. T have here a can opener which can't be beat. Can didly, 1t can open any can that can be opened by any can opener, and if you can show me a can,sI can--''
 Gan 1t, or I'll call out the canine," cried the woman cantankerously. and the canvasser cancelled all further at tempts and cantered away towards Can terbury whistling a canzonet.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Uncle Andy should know that money cannot Say when peace and war shall take place. Both name their own dates, especially when they are as hot-blooded as we were when the Maine was sunk.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

After all wars have been declared "off' the Carnegie peace fund is to be devoted to the next greatest evil and 1t may be suffraglsm, or 1t may be dyspepsia, or it may be Alabama's fee system.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
Rank of Alabama Cities

"If Bessemer had annexed territory that naturally forms a part of Greater Bessemer, that prosperous municipality would today rank fourth among the cities of Alabama" said an old citizen of Jef- ferson county.
 Selma. with a population of 13,649, comes next to Montgomery and, there- fore, has fourth place. Anniston has fifth place and Bessemer with 10,S64 ranks No. 6. But Bessemer by rights should have fully 1900. As it is 1t makes a comparatively fine showing. an increase over 1900 of 70 per cent. No city in the south of anything like Bessemer's cen sus population can boast of more stable values or brighter prospects for future browth.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

A slice of Mir. carnegie's peace money cludes civil wars and directs his peace board to stop those of the international sort
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
A WEATHER SIGN AT PADUcAH

From the Lebanon Falcon.
 Every night men put off until tomor- row socks that should have been alarmed last week. says the Courier-J ournal Darned or no darned, it was too cold to take them of Sunday night.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Dr. Wiley is going to marry a sui fragette and if he misbehaves he may wish he had stuck to his campaign against benzoate of soda.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Pittsburg has already begun an annex atlon movement against 1912. It is the early bird that stands well in census tables.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Italy does not employ capital punish ment, and Porter Charlton will not get what is coming to him after all.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Editor Watterson has gone to Wash ineton and some fear his campaign roosters will be taken there for lame ducks.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Horace White, temporary governor of New York, is spending his last days in high office. He will not come back.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

The republicans seem to be short Of timber for chief justices. They have not had one in a generation.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

The peers say they are not so very hereditary, for over half of them have beer created in the last 90 years.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

No one would have thought 40 years ago than an ex-conderedate would preside oyer the United States supreme court.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

We have forgotten the Bagbag and General Funston is jumped in the army frequently and there is no kick on his part.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

After Congress adjourns the lame ducks will try to get their legs reset, but few will succeed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

While Andrew Carnegie gives s10,00O, GOO for peace Secretary Dickinson demands $50, COG for war.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Cheap parcels posts hurt no small stores or small towns in Germany, France or England, and they would hurt no one bera
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

The democrats certainly got a square deal in supreme court appointments.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Not satisfied with their French prince the Goulds have annexed another foreign file
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Lorimer is no worse than the servants of Privilege in the Senate.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

Forty-two legislatures will decide next month the fate of the income tax amend ment.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

The snowdrift has superseded the land
 slide up north.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
Talks of Business in south

Robert S. Maxey, Jr., of well-known New York house, passed through Bir- mingham yesterday en route to his home in Brandon, Miss, where he will spend the holidays with his parents.
 He Is we'll known among the merchants of Alabama, with whom he has been dealing for a number of years. He said last night in talking of the trade for the past twelve months that fl had been as good as was expected, and that every one seems to be satisfied with the wind up of the season. Mr. Maxey. who claims Birmingham as his home, flnished' second in a race of a number of statesmen for orders received. He said travelling in the south and making such a record demonstrated that the merchants of the south were awake to the wider chances Of business than before.
 Business with our firm has been splendid all during the year." he said. we have been receiving rush orders at the New York house during the past few months, while the travelling sales men have been abundantly patronlzed. The rural merchants and those in the larger places have broadened out great deal during the year, which, of course, suggests the idea that a greater amount of money has been available for them. The large cotton crop and the overwhelm- ing corn crop were two agricultural re- suits which poured stream of gold into the pockets of the southern merchants"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

MT. Pinchot is leaving but little white wash on MT. Ballinger.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

RE-SUFFRAGETTE TIMES.
 According to old-fashioned notions, it was impolite to mention trousers Tn the presence of women"
 "Yes. That was in the days before women became so alarmed eager to wear them"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
For the Public Good

For the Public Good
 "Every one should be alive to the im- portance of safeguarding the public health," said a prominent man, land in that connection I would like to see prac- ticai good growing out of the resolutions introduced by Dr. Robert Nelson, city health officer, at the November meeting of the Jefferson County Medical society and unanimously adopted. After a pre- amble based on a certain typhoid fever case, the resolutions were as follows: That we recommend to the City Coun- cil of Birmingham that each dairy sell ing milk within the limits of the city not connected with sanitary sewerage be required to install some device. to be ap- proved by the city health department, whereby such excreta and garbage may be protected from flies during accumu- lation, and then burned. It is the sense of this meeting that the moderate cost involved in this sanitary procedure is in no sense an injustice to these dairies, since the residents of any given section where sewers are available are ordered to connect with said sewers at much greater cost for plumbing, toilet devices, etc.
 T understand that a draft of an ordi- nance is now before the City Council which provides for putting the recom- mendation of the medical society into effect. I hope it will become law"
 About Persons
 W. P. Tarrt. prominent banker of Livingston, spent yesterday in Birming- ham,
 Senator John Hollis Bankhead was in Birmingham yesterday. He will return to Washington January 3.
 w. W. Patton, well-known young lawyer of Livingston, was in Birming- ham on business yesterday.
 Senator John Rogers, the well-known planter of Sumter county. was a visitor to Birmingham yesterday. He is rated high among the orators of the state.
 John Bankhead, the well-known lawyer of Jasper, spent yesterday in the city.
 w. K Pckens, Sumter county official, had business in Birmingham yesterday.
 Ernest Lacey of Jasper, a former Wal ker county legislator, is registered at the Hillman.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
Cou,d Not Find High School

"A friend of mine, who was in the city
 few days ago, surprised and amused me
 very much by relating his troubles In
 finding the Birmingham High school"
 said a. well-known educator yesterday.
 Ut arose from the efforts of my friend
 to secure from various policemen of the
 city information as to just where the
 High school is located. He started out from the Hotel Hillman and asked the
 traffic squad man located at Third and Nineteenth. That policeman did not know where the High school was. He went up to the one standing in the middle of the street at Second avenue and Nineteenth street and he did not know where the school was. He went from that one to Parker's corner and asked the police man where he could find the High school. That officer did not know.
 / Laughing in amazement that Birming- hams finest did not know where one of the best buildings in the city was To- cated, and where 12OO people meet every day, he went to Second avenue and Twen- tieth street. There he asked the officer where the High school was. That one did not know. He entered cigar stand then, and laughing very heartily asked for a cigar The clerk inquired of what was the joke. My friend said, It surely Is a joke all right
 Turning to the bright young man behind the counter, my friend inquired the way to the Birmingham High school The cigar man said: tell you, brother, it is up this way somewhere (pointing northeasterly), but the exact corner I can't say. l pass the building almost every day, yet I can't recall the street and avenue. You just go in this direc- tion and you will find it.
 My friend went in that direction and found the High school. To my mind that suggests a rather odd condition here. Po- licemen of all men in city should be well informed, especially as to the pub lie buildings. But there were several men located right in the, heart of the city who could not tell rank stranger where the most valuable city building was and where over 1000 people meet and remain hours every day. I should thing some mental exercise should be given the po- licemen added to chart of the city, so that when strangers come here they can get such information. In many towns the traffic policemen can tell quickly the To- cation of every public place."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
CoNgpERARLY CRAMPEp.

Goodness me! Look at those people coming out of a door backward "Where?" Across the hall"
 "Oh, that's Biffkins and his wife going out to the theatre. Their fiat isn't large enough to turn around in"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

THE LESSER OF TWO EVILS. 'He keeps his phonograph going all the time when he's at home"
 T should think he'd get tired of that"
 ''He says it's the only way he can drown his wife's voice."
 One is as bad as the other"
 Not quite. The photograph doesni call him hard names"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21

 "Oh, that's Biffkins and his wife going out to the theatre. Their fiat isn't large enough to turn around in"
 WHY IS AN EGG? We've seen the quackng ducks in ponds, We've heard the turkey yelp. We've heard the little biddes raise Their piercing cries for help. We've heard the honking peacock And admired his gaudy hue; We've seen the cackling Plymouth Rock, When off her nest she flew. We've heard of duck eggs. turkey eggs And eggs by reptiles lain; There still remains kind of egg, The '1ength" we can't explain. We leave our problem unto you, With this we end our tale. What DO they mean who advertise, FRESH YARD EGGS FOR SALE"?
 -"B"-Ensley. While not well up on eggs. good sir Except as they're prepared At various lightning enteries.'' Where many time we've fared, ward eggs" must be the kind new
 lain,
 From some barnyard withdrawn. Perhaps by stealth. with lantern dark Long ere the paly dawn, Which come to table, as 1t were, Quite free from any fault And don't lie dead ten years or more In some cold storage vault.
 A SANDWICH SOUND. "I see where MT. Cunningham Fri dayed' in Pekin, Ill., ''Yes?'
 DO you suppose he is in the lunch room business?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-12-21
The Census Work

.while some cities in different parts of the country have been disappoih'- ed in the census reports, the great ma 5ority have every reason to be satis- fed" said Enos c. Hamilton of Wasn- ington. D. c.
 Louisville Is the only city or tne larger class that seems to have Just cause for disappointment. Cincinnati and St. Louis both felt sore, I under stand, over their census standing put each probably got full count. visit Cincinnati frequently and believe that # that city had extended It's limits and annexed Norwood and other pop ulous residence towns that belong to all intent and purposes to the Cincinnati community the metropolis of the ohio valley would have come into the cen sus table for 1910 with 450,000, the pop ulation claimed. instead of the 364,0oo that the census bureau gave 1t. But Louisville would seem to have 275,o00; certainly not less than 250,000 It would be good idea for every city to have its population closely counted by local enumerators every year or two. 1t could be done without much cost and each city would then have the satisfaction of Knowing just where 1t was at in the matter of population.
 "While it is true that the public &C., cepts only government figures, still an accurate local enumeration just before the census man came around would un- occasionally cause Uncle Sam's enum- erotors to be extra careful"