Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1910-04-08
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| WI o. al IiiOC-luuccu. Anu ulu your
ancestors wear traces?
He lin full uniform)-I love the
smell of powder. She delightfully."-
Oh, do you? Don't you think the vio-
let scent is the best?-Baltimor Amer
lean.
well, Johnny, do you wish you were
grown-up man." You bet l do"
But why?" $50 people wouldn't ask
me such fool questions. Cleveland
Leader.
Small Boy-Pa, what is an optimist?
pam optimist, my son, is man
who doesn't care rap wnat happens
so that it doesn't happen to him.
Tit-Bits.
do you think you will keep your
new cook?" 1--WE don't know. She
has taken US on trial, but we are in
hopes that we will suit."-Baltimor
American.
Hostess-You won't come to church
with us, then, Phyllis? Phyllis (down
for the week end)-I don't think so,
dear. You see. shouldn't know soul
there'-London Opinion.
He-When I called you up on the
telephone last evening you seemed
very cold in your answers. She-Oh,
no, really! 1t must have been the ice
on the wires.-Boston Transcript.
His mother-Charlie, come down
from that tree this minute, or I'll call
your father! Charlie-Oh, pop can't
come now; he's busy writing my COM
position for me.-Meggendorfer Blaet.
ter.
Dick-I know a girl who accepts
rings from men she doesn't know
Clara-I don't believe 1t. How could
she? Dick--Why, she has to, you
know; she's a telephone girl-Tit-
Bits.
College Student-Roses are red, vio-
let's are blue, Send me ten dollars and
I'll think of you. Loving Father
Some roses are red, others are pink,
| i
think.
"But why do you put your friends
things in the dining room?" "Oh he
Is so used to restaurants that he won't
enjoy his dinner unless he can watch
his hat and coat. t."-Washington Cd.
c. Herald.
Elsie-Why is Clara always so short
of money? Didn't her father leave
her lot? Madge-Yes; but you see
she's not to get it till she's 30, and
she'll never own up to that!"-Boston
Transcript.
There will be balcony scene in
this play" Il dare say" said the
cynical manager, "and there'll prob
ably be scene in the gallery and par
quet, too, If you ever try to put it on"
st Louis Star.
Wife-Now, see ere, Jim; If yer
don't provide for me better shall quit
so l warns yer. Husband-Provide
better? Well, like that. Why, amt
got yer three good jobs O. work this
larst month?-Sketch.
Il married my first husband for mon
ey, and my second for love-" Then
you are very happy now, l suppose?"
mo. Alas! no. You see, my first hus-
band married me for love, and my Sec
ond for money."-Fliegende Blaetter.
Ethel calling on her friend)-I
didn't know you were one of those
athletic girls. Madge-What do you
mean, dear? Ethel-Look at those
foils over your bureau. Madge-Foils!
Why, those are my hat pins.-Boston
Transcript.
Newlywed-Don't you think, dear, II
l were to smoke it would spoil your
curtains? Wifey-You are certainly
the most thoughtful husband. 1t
wouldn't do the curtains any good.
Newlywed-Then, dearfe, take the cur
tains down.-Kansas City journal.
Young Wife-Yes, dearest, I'm 60
ing to favor YOU at dinner tonight
with a new cake that l invented all
by myself. Young Husband (gloomi-
ly)-Say, guess this will be good
night for me to bring Jim Taggart
home to dinner I don't like Jim
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Say, NAV, do l look like your"
why, Yes, Willie, l think there Is q
resemblance. Why do you ask?"
"'Cause when Mr.. Pipton laid his CT
gar down on the porch rail took 1t
up an smoked 1t, an he said had
your eyes, nav, an your nose, an
your Gilman paws nerve!"-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
Little Davey was forever asking
questions. You'd better keep still or
something will happen to you," his
tired mother finally told him one
night. Curiosity once killed cat,
you know" Davey was so impressed