Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1910-07-02
NEW SYSTEM OF "SIL ENCE"
WORKS WONDERS FOR HUBBY
HIS one is going to be about a
new system Of domestic silence
for husbands at critical juno
lures. These critical junctures.

I1lS one Is SOlIfS 10 De dUouI Il
new system of domestic silence
for husbands at critical juno
lures. These critical junctures.
it Is assumed for the purpose
Of calculation. happen in the lives of all
husbands. Domestic critical tunctures OF
the type here in mind are undodgable.
The man who told us about this system
didn't get it at second hand. He developed
it all of a sudden and all by himself. by
a sort of inspiration. The method. how
ever has as yet remained unpublished. so
that we can't help but take certain
modest pride in the thought that we are
stalking the world-and husbands. particu-
larly-to something quite new and kertish
Perhaps the best way to unfold it will
be to set down the facts as to how the
,,cheme worked out in the case of the man
who first pulled 1t and who told us ABOUT
it. This man, a friend Of ours. is pretty
sedate, except occasionally. Occasionally
he makes a quiet little mooch on the
reservation and basks in the-er-ln the
we'll, occasionally he isn't exactiy 50
sedate as at other times.
On these occasions he doesn't brew any
war medicine or seek to shoot up the
agency to the obligato Of hideous coyote
winnings. He just nudges of somewhere
and basks OF course, at the termination
o. such times Friend Wife would not
receive him. upon his return from pask-
ing, with wide arms On the contrary
She would receive him with wide lips.
from which proceeded many. many opser-
yationS and things.
She would tell him his name. number
and hammock hook and mess figure In
Esperanto and Noiapuk and the latest
system of stenography, and then she
would double on her trail and tell MIN
slews of things in plain. not to say ACID,
English.
On such occasions, formerly, before he
pulled this new system, the man would,
IN the old. old, foolish barnyard way, say
things in reply.
He would explain. He would apologize
He would say never no more Tor him:
He would seek to mitigate. sidestep and
crawfish. OF course. this stuff never was
q bit of use. 1t all went unheard.
The spouse hadn't an ear tor any OF
his lines. She was too busy with her
own talking picture role. He might
just as well have been lava statute
from Easter Island so far as any of his
tions didn't explain. His apologies didn't
apologize. His never-no-mores were by
no means effective in subdung or quell-
ing or softening her asperity.
And SO, formerly, before Tie udyo VI
the system, the talk I'D weave back and
forth between the penitent and his spouse,
and from apologiZing he'd get sore and
say things he didn't mean and that he
was sorry for later, and there'd be do
nestle all-hands-around crouch, and the
whole bizni became a more or less inn
medicable mess.
A little while ago this misguided male,
In a moment of flaccidity, skunk over to
N'Yawk. The old grind had little on
his raw, the ancient rut had begun to
press on him a heap. and so away he
went to the foolish large town. animated
by desire to flag the routine for few
brief days and forget the monotonous
home thing.
In N'Yawk he had the usual roof
gardeny time. He was there for three
days, two of which were sleeping SUM-
hers. The shadow of the square-up that
was to be lowered over him darkly while
he was roof-gardening in N'Yawk. Never
theless he went through with it, knowing
full we'll that he might as we'll be hung,
upon his return, for an Ochre-hued canine
as for lamb with caper sauce.
On his way home here to Washington
in the lacQuered roller he was very.
Of the Square-Up doomed larger and
blacker. He knew how futile, fruitless,
val nand piffiing any or all of his expla-
nationnes and apologies would be. He
had the entire mental picture before him;
his protestations, his sorrinesses, his in
effectualness through it all; her remorse-
less panning, her determination not to
permit him to poke in any palliatives.
1t was at this juncture that the inspira-
ton visited him. He didn't feel like talk
ing Similarly, he didn't feel like being
talked at. So 1t all came to him like q
slant of sizzling light across an arid
plain.
He would say precisely nothing at ALL
That was the resolution he made on the
train. Say nothing whatever. Say moth
ing The wheels of the car took up the
Say nothing refrain and clinched him
in this high and winning resolve.
So he stopped at a late-keeping-open
BARRIERS to get shaved and dolled up be-
fore he reached home. way after dark.
and when he reached home and inserted
the key he felt fortified by the knowledge