The Holbrook news., 1910-06-17

did she decide? Milwaukee News.
 Little boy, haven't I seen you in my Bible class?" Not unless I walks in me sleep. lady."-New Orleans Pic ayune.
 Ella-Bella married an octogenariau. Stella-I don't think that a girl ought to change her religion for a man. Chicago Daily News.
 What selection is that the orchestra has just finished?" 'I don't know. Sounded to me like neuralgia express ed in music. c."-Tit-Bits. l Daughter-Did you have to fish much. mamma, before you caught papa? Mother-Fish, my dear, fish! I was bear hunting.-M. A. P.
 How much does it cost to get mar ried?" asked the eager youth. That depends entirely on how long you live" replied the sad-loooking man.
 How is the water in the bath, Li- setter" Cold, my lady. It turned baby fairly blue" Then don't put Fido in for an hour or Pittsburg Post
 He-Why are you so sad. darling? She-I was just thinking, dearest, that this is the last evening we can be to- gether till to-morrow.-Chicago Daily News.
 Professor (exanining medical stu dent)-If you were called out to pa tient what is the first question you would ask? Medical Student-Where he lives.
 Splendid color, isn't it?" asked the fishmonger, cutting open a salmon Yes" replied the purchaser. looks as if it were blushing at the price you ask for it'
 Wiggs-How do you know he's for eigner? He has no accent? Waggs- No, but he knows so many ways in which this country could be improved. Philadelphia Record.
 What did the poet mean when he called his country the land of the free and the home of the brave'?' He was probably referring to bachelors and married men," said old MT. Smithers, sadly
 What do you suppose, Algernon," tue luluS dShOu, lo IAC lOooO-4 the ocean is salty?" "I am sure don't know" drawled Algy. unless it is be- cause there are so many codfish in 1t. Success Magazine.
 The Manager-I've got a new idea for a melodrama that ought to make a hit. The Writer-What is 1t? The Manageable idea is to introduce 8 cyclone into the first act that will kill all the actors.-Tit-Bits.
 I've got to go to Philadelphia" said the hurried traveller, who was fumbling for his pocketbook Well" answered the New York ticket-seEler, ''are you buying transportation or just telling your troubles Washington Star.
 Bowers-I understand that the doc tors have just had a consultation on Murphy. What conclusion did they come to? Powers-They decided that the patient was not wealthy enough to stand an operation.-Spokane Review.
 Ebeneezer-Them skeeters makes mo think of them city visitors we had the week before last, His Wife-How's that. ED? Ebeneezer-They come pret- ty near bein' the worst singers and the biggest eaters I ever see.-Illustrated Bits.
 Gladys-Oh, mamma, Here's note from that long-haired pianist He says it will be impossible for him to play at our reception tonight. Mamma Whats the trouble? Gladys-Some one stole his wig.-Chicago Daily News.
 The Kind Lady-You clear of or I'll set the dog at you. The Tramp-Ah. 'ow deceptive is 'uman natur'. Fer two nights I've slept in yer barn, eaten of yer poultry an drunk of yer cider. and now yer treats me as an utter stran- ger.-The Sketch.
 They tell me-" said the innocent maid, that your marriage was the re. suit of love at first sight. Is it true?" Tt is," answered the round-shouldered man, sadly. Had I been gifted with second sight I'd still be in the bachelor si"-Chicago Record Herald.
 q hope you will be interested in yonder gentleman said the hostess. T have assigned him to take you out 70 dinner" "I shall be-" responded the ady addressed. That gentleman was my husband. and he's behind with his alimony."-Louisville Cour- er-Journal.
 Magistrate-Oficer, what is this man .harged with Constable-He's a cam ,ra fiend of the worst kind. yer wor- Ihip. Magistrate-But this man ,houldn't have been arrested simply be- .ause he has a mania for taking pic ures. Constable-It isn't that, yer he takes the cameras.-Bos- on Globe.
 That is a fat, prosperous-looking sn- ,elops Does our salesman send in a Jig bunch of orders?" Not exactly. That envelope contains a receipt Tor lis last check, his expense account for