Los Angeles herald., 1910-05-16
Mere Men

N HIS man must be about as ener-
getic an enemy of the plumbers as
"A any living Individual. He Is go
ing to walk from Coney Island to the
Pacific coast to take a bath. He ex-
poets to do it In 100 days. His name
is John Ennis. 1t is mere assumption
that he Is trying to get even with the
plumbers, but no other reason can be
imagined for the strenuous undertake
ing he has assumed. There are times
when a man in his dealings with a
plumber might be well justified in such
rash action. John Ennis is the first
man who has thought of this particular
form of revenge. Now that he has
projected the innovation, thousands
may be expected to cross the continent
annually to bathe just to hand their
family plumber hot one.
DennV Brereton, trustee of the Mary
e. Schenley estate, has filed a claim for
81 cents for himself. 1t represents an
outlay for kilograms during the past
year. Mr.. Brereton, being a millionaire,
has just cause to fight to the bitter end
for the granting of the claim. The
people must fight for their rights. Ihe
populace, the great under-half of the
public, must get all that is coming to
1t. The poor millionaire must watch all
odds and ends and let nothing get by,
else he die for want of food and raj
ment. The multi-triple-billion are
inclined to oppress those of small means
with whom they have business, and al
though there is no accusation of op-
preston in this instance, the common
people will rejoice to see fellow MEM
Der scramDllng for all that is his.
1t looks as though John D. Rockefel-
Ter will have, to be sent to Paris. He
L.. ltrrIaA o.
tator of fashions, and as such he can
no longer remain with any degree of
propriety in this country. He must TO
Paris. Next season, along with the
report that trained seal hats and hips
on the elbow are proper, will come news
that John D. Rockefeller has given out
as his latest creation an umbrella OF
frog skin with green sleigh bells around
the edge. All of this is brought forth
upon receipt of the announcement that
Mr. Rockefeller in an endeaVor to pop
ularize paper vests is giving them to
his guests upon rides in his automobile
or behind his horses.
No new fashion hereafter will be ac-
cepted by the most refined without Mr..
Rockefelers O. K. The four hundrrd
will first give his paper vests tryout,
and If they prove successful, as they
will, no doubt, no new style can ever
without first visiting Mr.. Rockefeller
and being received cordially at his fire
side, if it be winter, or in his spring
house, If it be summer.
Madame Rockefeller was seen on the
boulevard this morning in an elegant
suit of yellow Belgian hare fur, clipped
close and decorated with red baby rib
bon and lettuce" will appear in daily
papers in the near future. Immediately
after which everybody will be wearing
them.
The Rev. Father Philip ]. Magrath,
New York, did quite an extraordinary
thing one night last week for gentle
parson. James DWyer, a member or
Father Magraths Seamen'S mission,
told him that he had been robbed of
$50 by water front thieves. Father Ma
grath decided to find the thieves.
Every morning after closing the mis-
sion at midnight the priest has been
looking for the thugs. One mornig he
strolled into the very center of hold
UP party on Tenth street. There We're
three thieves and one victim. The vic
tim was in such a condition that he
might as we'll have been one of the
thieves. Father Magrath jerked up his
right sleeve about two inches and
placed three blows with full steam upon
the respective jaws of the three thieves:
Three thieves slept the sweet sleep OF
childhood. TIL priest blew his police
whistle. The three thieves woke up
before the police arrived. However, the
priest acquitted himself magnificently.
He held two of the rufflans until they
could be properly pinched. One of the
thieves and the victim escaped.
It is easy to smile if you are careless
about what gets your sense of humor
goat. If decrepit old chestnuts are al
lowed to scratch your funny bone just
as If they were fresh, crisp and breezy,
it is a cinch to look pleasant from sun
rise to sunset. President Taft, whose
smile is one of the national institutions,
has let it out. The president declares
that he Is never supercilious in the
presence of a joke. He refuses to go
into the family history of any jest when
it comes his way. He just cuts loose
when anything with the earmarks of
humor shows up, even though there Is
chance of its being a grandfather in
swaddling clothes.
Senator Burkett was talking about
art and an art commission in the sem
ate, and was telling about two statues
erected on a great battlefield. One, he
said, was made by some man whose
name was practically unknown. 1t was
ideal. Inc Otner was IIldue Dy d SI01I
artist.
1T was artistic,"' "'said Burkett, "but
as Gen. Ainsworth, who is most
competent judge of what an American
soldier looks like, said no soldier ever
saw a soldier look like that statue"
An Oklahoma man Is obliged to boost
and boom something, even if it is not
his home state. When Colonel j. Blair
Shoenfelt of Muskogee passed through
the national capital on his way home
from a trip to Cuba it had been several
months since he had been in Okla
homa, so he turned his attention to
the Isle of Pines. He says that" the
Isle of Pines, populated entirely by
Americans, is clamoring for stable
form of government under the control
of the United States.
NO CHANGE