davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
| John henry
| = Lucky Days
| By GEORGE ". HOBART

when they get it finished. won't it?'
chirped Tacks.
Just then Aunt Martha squeezed in
from shopping excursion and went
out in the hall while she counted up
and dragged out the days spells for
Clara J. to look at.
Aunt Martha is Uncle Peters wife,
only she weighs more and breathes
oftener.
When the two of them visit our
bird cage at the same time the janitor
has to go out and stand in front of the
building with view to catching it II
1t falls.
That night / waded into all the
sporting papers and burned dream
pipes till the smoke made me dizzy,
The next day hit the track with
three sure-fres and couple of per
hapses
There was nothing to it. All had
to do was to keep my nerve and not
get side-tracked and I'd have enough
coin to make Andrew Carnegie's check
book look like punched meal ticket.
played them--and when the An.
gelus was ringing Moses O'Brien and
three other bookbinders were out buy.
ing meal tickets with my money.
Things went along this way for
about a week and was all to the bad
One evening Clara r. said to me:
"John. looked through your check
book today and I've had cold In my
chest ever since. At first thought
had opened the refrigerator by mis-
take
At last the blow had fallen.
had promised her faithfully before
we were married that I'd never play
the ponies again and fell and broke
my word.
The accident was painful, and I'd
be sad scamp to put her wise at this
late day, especially after being fried
to finish.
/ simply didn't dare confess that my
money had gone into fund to furnish
home for incurable bookmakers-
what to do? What to do?
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

by the women They cut OF the limb
to which the nest was fastened and
brought the trophy to Hamilton, who
placed the nest over his fireplace.
He was on his porch waiting for
the hunters moon to show over the
eastern hills when he heard roaring
noise inside. Thinking the chimney
was afire he rushed In. The room was
full OF hornets, swirling in clouds The
warmth from the fireplace had ava
kened them. The artist pried open
two windows and threw open door
to cool of the place. At midnight he
ventured into the house. as the cold
air had reduced the army to quiet.
At three o'clock in the morning
Hamilton had cleaned house and
buried pailfuI OF hornets under the
pines.
did you get stung?" was asked Of
Hamilton.
HIM! In what way do you mean?''
he spared. "Oh, by the hornets?"
"No-o. not by them
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

If every one in the country knew
all the languages that John D. Prince,
professor of languages at Columbia
would be no call for a universal
tongue. Instead. we could go right
ahead talking to every stranger we
happened to meet in whatever Ian
guage the latter chose to talk to us.
When he isn't busy teaching the
young men at Columbia Professor
Prince finds time to take an active in
terest in politics in Paterson, N j.,
where he lives and for some years
he has been state senator in the New
Jersey legislature from his district.
Professor Prince admits that his mar
velous knowledge of languages has
more than once won him the vote of
some newly made citizen who hadn't
as yet acquired English AS the crown
ing performance Of his use of Ian
guages, he recently made a political
speech in which he employed II diff
ferent languages.
If one asks Professor Prince how
many languages ne Knows he modest
iy disclaims complete knowledge of
any, even the English. A little closer
questioning. however. discloses the
fact that he can make himself under
stood in practically every distinct Ian
guage that is used on the face of the
globe, and few minutes study Of any
Of the hundreds of dialects that are
spoken in various corners of the earth
will enable him to decipher much of
what is written in it.
Il doubt very much," said Professor
Prince, whether any one man actual
ly knows even the English language.
For example, doubt il / understand
the English language as 1t Is now used
In the science Of aeronautics. Just so
others who may be thoroughly famil-
far with the English language, as they
suppose, do not know one-half the
terms employed in the automobile In
dustry, for each bolt and nut In a mo-
tor car has a distinct name.
There really is. so far as know,
only one language that is absolutely
impossible for white man to master,
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Believers in the Darwinian theory
of mans descent from the monkey
tribe might claim additional proof OF
the doctrine in an incident which oc-
CURED recently at Red Bluff, Cal,
where a monkey committed suicide
by hanging himself with a piece of
quilt The animal had shown some
ill-temper, and had been punished by
its keeper. In suiky fit, 1t was put
to sleep in its cage at night as usual.
Next morning the monkey was found
hanging dead to the roof OF the cage
1t had torn the strips Of quilt, formed
them into rope, and deliberately
ended It's own life BY hanging.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
Seven, come eleven!

Seven, come eleveni
After promising Clara ]. that !
would never again light pipe at the
race track, there stood, one Of the
busiest puff-puff ladies on the circuit.
Well, the truth Of the matter is just
this: fell asleep at the switch and
somebody put the white lights all over
me.
Just how ] happened to join the
Dream Builders association / don't
know, but for several weeks was
willie the Wild Boy at the race track
and kept all the booknakers busy
trying not to laugh when they took
my money.
Every day when showed UP at the
gate the pipers played Darling,
Dream Of Met" and every time
picked skate the Smokers society
went into executive session and elect
ed me life member.
Every horse that finished last gave
me the trembling lip as he crawled
home, we'll aware of the fact that |
had caught him with the goods.
/ blame Bunch Jefferson for putting
the bug in MY central.
81 Bunch went down to the skating
pond one day with SIS and picked
four live wires at an average OF to 1.
Then he began to talk about himself.
After that event whenever hap
pened to meet Bunch he would raise
his megaphone and I'LL the neighbor-
hood with hot ozone. fresh from the
oven.
1t was pitiful to see that boy swell.
Just TO cure Bunch and drive him
out of the balloon business made up
my mind one day I'd run down to the
IFlatfish Factory and drag few hon
est dollars away from the bookmakers.
SPLASH
That's where fell overheard.
One bright Saturday P. M. found me
'clinging to wad the size of foun-
tain pen and trying to decide whether
I'D better play Dinkalorum at 40 to /
or Mysteries at to 5.
finally decided that a ten-spot on
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Dinkslorum would net me enough to
give Bunch line of sad talk, SO
stepped up to the poor-box and con-
tributed
Dinkalorum started off in the lead
like a pale streak, and l Immediately
bought an entirely new set of furni-
lture for the fiat.
About half way around locomotive
whistle happened to blow near by;
IDinkalorum, being Union horse,
Thought it was six o'clock and refused
absolutely to work a minute over
time.
/ had to put the furniture back in
the store.
In the next race I decided to play a
system of my own invention, 80 took
my program, counted seven up, four
down and two up, all Of which result
ed in Pink Slob at so to 1.
It looked good and handed Isadore
iLonginger $40 for the purpose of
tearing 5000 away from him little
later on.
Pink Slob got away in the lead, but
he made the mistake of walking fast
instead Of running, with the result
that when tho other horses were back
in the stable, Pinkie was still giving
q heel and toe exhibition around near
third base.
1t wasn't my day, so squeezed into
the thirst parlor and bathed my in
dured feelings with sarsaparilla
Just before the last race ran
across Bunch. He was over $500 to
the good and he wanted TO treat me to
a lot of kind words he felt like saying
about himself.
oh! bat maybe he wasn't the city
how with the head in the suburbs!
When reached home that night I
felt like sock that needs darning.
Clara ]. had invited Uncle Peter to
take dinner with us and he began to
rive me the nervous look-over as soon
as answered roll call.
Uncle Peter Is a very stout old gem
tleman. When he squeezes into our
little Nat the walls act like they are
bow-legged.
Uncle Peter always goes through
me folding doors sideways, and every
time he sits down the man In the nat
below kicks because we move the
plano 80 often.
Tacks was also present
Tacks IL my youthful brotherinrlaw
with q mind like walking delegate
Because he's always looking for trotr
Bic, and when he finds It he passes It
10 to somebody who doesn't need Il
'.hyening, Johnl" gurgled Uncle
Peter. Late, aren't your
Gears blocked; delayed me-" !
sighed.
New York win be nice place
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

She had me dashed to the mast.
May inquire my wife continued
with the breath of winter in her tones,
why it's all going out and nothing
coming in? Have you begun so soon
to lead double iife?"
Mother, call your baby boy back
homel II Uncle Peter would only
drop In, or Tacks or Aunt Martha or
even the janitor!
Suddenly it occurred to me: Dear
ie," said, you have surprised my
secret, and now nothing remains but
the pleasure of telling you every
thing"
A thaw set In
"As you have stated, not incorrect
ly, my dear, large bundles Of Green
Fellows have severed their home ties
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

squirm and wiggle around the barrier.
In front, behind and on either side
were moccasins, and he soon saw it
was battle which would terminate In
kill or being killed. He determined
TO sell his life dearly and gave no
quarter, and when the battle ceased
the carrier had twenty-four and one
half snakes to his credit He says
the half snake that sought shelter in
the rocks still is living
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
A sure Cure.

Mother-I'm afraid GwendoIine 10
setting her heart on that young PEN
nfless.
FatherYou think SO?
Mother am almost sure Of it.
Father Well, he is not fit person
for her to marry. He Is as poor as a
rat and has no prospects. Something
must be done to set her against him.
Mother-I have thought of that and
have hit upon what think is an excel
lent plan.
Father-Yes? What is It?
Mother-We must tell her that we
want her to marry him.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

and tiptoed into the elsewhere" CON
tinued. gradually getting my nerve
back.
The Thermometer continued to 60
up.
~Clara J., On several occasions you
have Expressed desire to leave iris
tornaup city and retire to the wood
lands. haven't your / asked.
She nodded and the weather grew
warmer.
"0nce you said to me. oh, John. If
they'd only take New York on the
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
ODD OLD CHURCH CEREMONY

Every September certain Sunday
is set apart in two or three villages of
England for the ceremony known as
Clipping the Church" This word
clipping means surrounding or en-
hracing, and is performed by the chill
dren and congregation forming cir
Gle with joined hands all round the
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
HORNETS CLEAN OUT STUDIO

Robert Hamilton. landscape artist
Of New York. was routed from his
studio in the Berkshire hills near
Lee, Mass. the other night by hornets
which had been brought to the place
in cold storage by two women.
The nest, almost as large as a
bushel basket, was found In the woods
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
rRY MURINE aye REMEnx

for Red, Weak, Weary, Watery Eyes
and Granulated Eyelids. Murine Doesn't
Smart Soothes Eye Pain. Druggists
Sell Murine Eye Remedy, Liquid, 25c,
SOC, $1.00. Murine Eye Salve In
Aseptic Tubes, ESQ, $100. Eye Books
and Eye Advice Free by Mail.
Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
He Never shaved AGAIN.

Marmaduke What do you suppose
that wretched barber said when he
shaved me7
BertieI don't know
Marmaduke He said 1t reminded
him Of a game he used to play when
boy called Hunt the Hare"
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

CdllpCu - WO0h4AOcn
and broken down
condition of the
system. ] read so
much ofwhatLydia
E. Pinkham's Veg.
etable Compound
had done for other
suffering women I
felt sure it would
help me, andI must
say it did help me
wonderfully. My
= pains all left me, j
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

church, singing special hymns for the
occasion. The most famous place
where this strange Sunday ceremony
is still extant. as It has been for many
hundred years, Is the pleasant Glouces-
tershire village Of Painswick near
Stroud. The parishioners after their
procession and ring round Painswick
church gather at the chancel door,
from which as customary sermon is
preached.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

DR.. Emdee-You should eat meat
very sparingly.
Mr.. Joax-I avoid 1t altogether.
eat nothing but lunchroom ham sand
wiches.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
Innporfant fo Inotharn


There is not vice which more eff
fectually contracts and deadens the
feelings than the desire Of accumulate
ing possessions Mant.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Hadn't you better look into that
sandwich before you eat tit"
'eWhy2"
There might be bug or some
thing 10 IT,"
And II there was ia be out the
dime I paid for IT,
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

and that is the original language of
the North American Indian. Those
who think they are talking Indian Ian
guages are, as matter of fact, talk
ing Chinook or something similar
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

At sixteen a girl thinks about roses
and poetry: at twenty-six her thoughts
run to cabbages and money.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Rheumatism, Neuralgia and Sore
Throat will not live under the same roof
with Hamlins Wizard Oil, the best Of
all remedies for the relief Of all pain.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

nettes were all turned on one particu-
lar box, but it was empty, the only
vacant place in the theater.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29
WANTS HER
LETTER
PUBLISHED
For Benefit of Women who
Suffer from Female Ills

Minneapolis, Mimi was great
sufferer from female troubles which
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

The original Globe built
heater Of the took It's place. Tho playhouse
at exhibition
Whitechape Gallery n
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces infiamina-
ton, allays pain, cures wind collie, CSC bottle.
The Morris County chronicle. [volume] (Morristown, N.J.) 1877-1915, 1910-11-29

Too often plano stool is the seat
of discord.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

lesson, it by no means relieves
the party from the responsible
ties of the policy it has been
pursuing. Had Cannon served
the people with one-half of the
zeal he has served tine special
interests. they would not now
be turning him over naked to
his enemies.
1.-The Democratic party, from
all indications throughout the
country. seems assured of a
triumphant victory. The peo-
pie seem to fully realize that
there is no other way by which
they can be relieved from the
burdens of exorbitant farifl
taxation except by the election
of Democratic candidates. They
believe that the tariff schedules
should be reduced by the friends
of the consumer.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

ONCE more the twelve apos-
ties of the Mormon Church, of
whom United States senator
Smoot is one, announce that
polygamy must cease. Why
don't they quit it themselves
instead of making political bar
gains with the Republican
bosses that they are not to be
interfered with if they "de.
liver the goods" in the shape of
the electoral votes of Utah.
Idaho and other States where
the Mormons hold the balance
of power
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

Discerning Republicans" are
in anxious doubt if not fear of
the consequences of champion
ship of the Republican cause
by Hearst. That utterance is
not from some Democratic or
gan, nor is it the peevish talk
of an insurgent it is the bold
declaration of that staunch Re-
publican newspaper, the New
York Press.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22
You Need Less Uf Devoe

Have you found this out? You need
less of Devoe lead-and. zine for a job
than of anything else less gallons less
money.
Putting ii on costs two or three times
as much as the paint. Have you found
this out? You can paint Devoe in less
time less time less money.
Have you found this out Devoe wears
longer than anything else.
We don't object to long time between
jobs. Our customers like it. And we
like what they like. 1t keeps our Gus
toners.
rs THE CORDDRY co.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

THE Republicans of Michigan
adopted a Harmony platform
with Roosevelt left out. Such
harmony may breed trouble in
the future.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

Your cough annoys you. Keep on
hacking and tearing the delicate mem
branes of your threat If you want to be
annoyed. But if you want relief, want
to be cured. take Chamberlain Cough
Remedy. Sold by all dealers.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

WHILE Teddy has been preach
ing his "new nationalism" in
the South and West, droves of
the Union Leaguers are revolt
ing against it III his own State.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

Hoarseness in a child subject to Group
is a sure indication Of the approach Of
the disease. II Chamberlain Cough
Remedy is given at once or even after
the croupy cough has appeared. it will
prevent the attack. Contains no poison.
Sold by all dealers.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

Don't forget that the Democrats
will hold mass meeting at the Court
House in Snow Hill. on Tuesday next.
October 25th. You are cordially invited
to attend the meeting and hear your
Congressman. Hon. J. Harry Covington,
discuss the issues of the campaign.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

"A large number of prominent people
from all sections of the county were here
on Wednesday, to attend the funeral OF
Mr.. James p. Townsend.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

He is and
He is hustler and straight a string
He is always in his in Congress- looking after the
best interests Of the people of Maryland
He will vote to reduce the tariff the necessities of
life. You should for JAMES HARRY CONVICTION
When you paint your house yon will find that the
price of paint has gone up SOC Soo gallon because of
the Republican tariff If you elect Democratic Congress
this will be remeded. Vote for James Harry Covington
and tariff reduction
Your wife will have pay for suit this year
than before, because of the Republican high tariff.
Vote for Covington.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22
SNOW HILL. MD. OCT. %.
Campaign issues.

TO wage their campaign. In
fact. there are so many issues
forced on the attention of the
voters through Republican sins
of commission and omission as
to almost confound many
voters. The campaign book
issued by the National Demo-
cratic Congressional Committee
in its table of contents places
"The tariff and cost of living"
as the paramount issue of the
campaign, and Republican ex-
travagance" as second in in
portance.
The Independent voter is
more than ever worth atten-
ton this year, because of his
greater numbers and his evil
dent trend toward Democracy.
Nothing will appeal more to
the Independent voter than the
two leading issues above men
toned, for both touch the peck
ct; and after all it is the mater
ial side that appeals in politics.
But there are also great moral
issues involved in the tariff and
in extravaganza. By reason of
the tariff the tax is imposed,
and by reason of extravagant
appropriations much of the tax
is wasted. Such is evidently
the idea of Governor Austin l..
Crothers, of Maryland, who the
Baltimore Sun reports 'has ac-
cepted number of invita-
tions to speak, and who will
make as many speeches as the
duties of his office will permit
The Sun also publishes state
ment of. Governor Crothers,
outlining the main issues upon
which he will speak, in which
he says: "The Republican party
in its last platform promised
that If it were again intrusted
with power it would revise the
tariff downward, SO as to lessen
the burdens of the people. Its
candidates won. Congress as
sembled, and a shameful repu-
diation of that promise was
made by the enactment of the
Payne-Aldrich tariff law. In
this campaign the Republican
party and its candidates are
confronted by the failure to
carry out this solemn pledge to
the people.
"a party cannot make a
more serious mistake than to
violate a platform pledge, as it
involves the embodied con-
science of the entire party adj
herence. AS a result of the
failure of the Republican party
to revise the tariff downward,
the cost of living has continued
to increase, constituting a great
hardship upon the millions of
toiling masses and consumers
of this country. The Payne
Aldrich law has also served to
enrich further the privileged
classes, in whose interest it was
manifestly passed.
sit will not suffice now TO
promise to relieve this over bur
dened and sinking ship by the
promise to cast Speaker Can
non, the captain of the vessel,
overheard. 1t is cowardly for
the Republican party to try to
visit It's sins upon Cannon
alone. Cannon is simply the
product of the recent policy and
system of the Republican party.
He has stood firmly for every
move made by the party in the
interest of the privileged class
es. While it may teach Cannon
as an individual a valuable
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22
COLBOURNE.

Mr.. and Mrs. J. T.. Dickerson and
daughter, Grace. visited Mr.. and Mrs.
Rufus Shoekley at whitebury last Sun
day.
Mr.. j w Dryden and son. Milton.
spent Sunday with friends in POWELL
Vile.
Mr.. and Mrs. Willard Carmean spent
last Saturday and Sunday with their
son. Mr.. Roy Carmean. near Girdletree.
A few of our people attended the
festival at the Old Furnace last Friday.
All reports indicated a good time.
Mr. Station Dryden. who has been
spending some time at home with his
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. j. W. Dryden.
has returned to Virginia. lie was ac-
companied by this brother, Mr.. Clarence
Dryden.
There will be servives at Mount Olive
NJ. r. Church Sunday at the usual hour
Mr. William Carmean has returned
home from Philadelphia. where she has
been spending some time with her
daughter. Mrs. Herman Riggin. Mrs.
Carmean reports very pleasant time.
Our Fall opening of millinery was a
grand success. Ifyou did not get a hat,
we will be pleased to show them to you
again, and If we have not what you
want will trim one to your taste. Mrs.
J. Cannon Shortt.
Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1910-10-22

Printed, Engraved
or Autographed at
the MESSENGER
Office.