The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-09
TWO BLOWHARDS WHIPPED

your eye on me, gentlemen, and lay
low and hold your breath, for I'm bout
to turn myself loose.
All the time he was getting this off
he was shaking his head and looking
fierce and kind of swelling around in a
little circle, tuckng up his wristbands
and now and then Strengthening UP and
beating his breast with his fist saying:
Look at me, gentlemen When he got
through he jumped up and cracked his
heels together three times and let off
a roaring "Whoo-oopl I'm the bloodiest
sort of wildcat that lives,'
Then the man that had started the
row tilted his old sloueh hat down over
his right eye; then he bent stopping
forward with his back sagged and his
fists a-shoving out and drawing in in
front of him, and so went around in
little circle about three times, swelling
himself up and breathing hard. Then
he Strengthened up and cracked his heels
together three times before he hit again
Chat made them cheer, and he began
to shout like this
''Whoo-oop. bow your neck and spread
Hold me down to the earth. for I feel
my powers a-working! Whoo-oop. I'm
a child of sin. Don't let me get start.
Smoked glass here for all. Don't attempt
to look at me with the naked eye, gentle
men. When I'm playful / see the meri-
dams of longture and the parallels of
latitude for sene and drag the Atlantic
ocean for whales. | scratch my head
with the lightning and purr myself to
sleep with the thunder. When I'm cold
bile the Gulf of Mexico and battle in
IT. when I'm warm fan myself with an
equinectial storm; when I'm thirsty
reach up and suck a cloud dry like a
sponge, when | range the earth hungry,
famine follows in my tracks,
Then the sother one went swelling
around and blowing aagin-the first one
the one they called Bob; next, the Child
of Calamity Clipped in again, bigger than
ever; then they both got at it at the same
time swelling round and round each
other and unching their fists most into
each others faces, and whooping and
paving like Injuns; then Bob called the
Child names, and the Child called him
names again. next Bob called him a
heap rougher names, and the Child came
back at him with the very worst kind of
language.
Both of them was edging off in differ
ent directions, growing and shaking their
heads and going on about what they
was going to do; but little black
whiskered chap skipped up and said;
Come back here, you couple of chicken
livered towards, I'll thrash the two yer
And he done ii, too. He snatched
them, he jerked them this way and
that, he booted them around, he knocked
them sprawling faster than they could
get up. Why, 1t wernt two minutes
till they begged like dogs-and how the
other lot did yell and laugh and clap
their hands all the way through, and
shout Sail in, Corpse Maker.''
"Hi At him again Child of Calam-
ity.'" Bully for you. little Davy!' Well,
II was perfect pow-wow for while
Bob and the Child had red noses and
black eyes when they got through. Lit
tie Davy made them both own up that
they were sneaks and towards and not
fit to eat with a dog and drink with
Niger; then Bob and the Child shook
hands with each other very solemn
and said they had always respected
each other, was willing to let bygones
be bygones. So then they washed their
faces in the river; and just then there
was a loud order to stand by for
crossing, and some of them went for
uard IN man the sueens there and the
rest went aft to handle the after sweeps.