Daily press. [volume] (Newport News, Va.) 1896-current, 1910-10-02
His One Mistake
BY F A. Mitchell
Copyrigs. 1910 by American Press
Association.

"Savin' yer prisinccsOi come to get
a squirt M the ex-prisidInt"
why do you wish 10 see the ex-
presidents"
"i}ecause livery one wants 10 see i'm.
to bc sure--becauSe he's the greatest
man on airth."
"Why is he great?"
Isn't he the frlnd of the workin'-
man. besides cOuntln' among his ac-
auaintances the crowned heads of
Urup?"
A sturdy gentleman in glasses smll-
cd. Pat" lie said. you are right In
placing the ex- president's friendship
for the wOrkingman ahead of bis ac-
quaintance with the crowned heads
Come with me- III show you around
the ex-president's place. and perhaps
you may get sight OF him"
Pat accepted the invitation. and the
two strolied about the grounds.
"Oi'm wonderin'." said Pat. where
he kapes the wild animals he brought
from Africa"
HE didn't bring any wild animals
alive from Africa. lie brought their
skins. They are to be stuffed for DIFF
ferent museums. But tell me more
about why you admire him.
"Wcll. Dim ihinkin'." Pat replied.
scratching his head. ''that-that. rs
told We. he's the frind o the workin'-
man. and Oi loike him becase he don't
moind tellin thin foryners what he
thinks OF 'em. But he made wan mis-
take In talkin' TO the Britishers."
whats that?'
"He tould 'em 10 get out o. Egypt
II would a been all roight IL he'd
made 1t Oirland."
The gentleman smiled
whats the valy O. them Egyptian
nagers anyway? And Orm hearin'
their country's nothin' but sand and
hot enough TO roast eggs in. savin' the
spalpeens haven't got the eggs. But
Oirland: The beautiful land that IL
Is, anG tne foine population of elligent
men and women. And them havin'
the feet o. England on their necks.
II the ex-prisident had said. 'Aither
govern Orland roight or git out 1t
nd n been loike sayin' git out o Or
land Gaze an Englishman can't gov
ern any one but nagers."
you've a good head on you. Pat
said the gentleman. What other
fault have you to find with the ex-
PRESIDENT
"Well. sor, i was lookin' while he
was In the White House for 'em to
take of the duty on tay. Tags a
foine drink. and the only people that
gifts 1t free are the Clancy nagers-"
but the president doesn't put the
duty on tea: congress does that. and
the president has no power to take it
OF"
Pat thought moment. then said:
Thin what's the use o maxim such
n fuss at elrciin' 'emT
Tell me some more faults of the
ex-president."
well. sorr. Oi'm thinsin' he wasn't
born in the roight country"
What country should he have been
horn in?"
.Oirland. Oh nivcr think OF i'm but
OF SO, in me mOind beautiful pictur
of i'm NJ an OirIsh fair. brandishin'
a shillalah over his head. jumpin up
and crackin' bis heels together. swear
in he kin whip the biggest man in the
crowd. He's mighty-what d'y' call
the word. stren-
us.
Another way loike 10 pictur I'm
is stirrin' up all them kings. tellin the
spaIpeens how TO govern their people
inst Ioike an American pTiSs'tent nd DO.
II. Oi can see 'im if he had the power
jumpin' around among EN-. knockin
OF their crowns and Sivin' the poo-
devils they've oppressed chance 10
live in their palaces awhile"
The gentleman led the way TO the
house on the top OF the nil and mo-
toned Tat 60 so in. I'll Introduce
you to the OK president" he said
But Pat demurred.
cit isn't for the loikcs o me in these
dirthy clothes TO go into the house OF
the great man. Besides. don't need
an introduction"
on don u
NO: I've been taIkin' TO i'm"
How did you know meg'
by the windy glass over yer ois and
yer beautiful white teeth I seen in the
newspaper pictures"
Good for you. Yon irish are cieT-
er race.
Not so clever as you Anerykins-"
How do you make that outg''
well. sorr. when ] scen v waikin'
about here. the cock O. the walk. ] had
enough pictur's Of 70 in me moind 20
cover the ceilin' % a church. u was
no credit 20 me 20 know ye. Bu; didn't
re cali me by me name without liver
hsvin' seen even a Photograph o me,
Ye called ne Pat AZ onct. Now. Oi
wonder. sorr. II &c kin gucss me oir