The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1910-09-16
Kansas-Where the Laws Are Enforcel

Kansas-Where the Laws Are Enforced.
As the train started to pull out across
the bridge, the grinning reporter came
into the smoking room and began to
gather up the drinking glasses.
whats the matter now. George Z"
asked the fat man in tho corner seat.
..Jes' gittin' ready for Kansas. Cap
tain the darky grinned- Every feller-
I got to furnish his own drinkin glass in
Kansas
.IIuhln snorted the fat man. LOT a
damned cranks. Who ever heard Of
such fool nation
An old man with a ragged gray beard
and a shrewd blue eye looked up from
his seat in the armchair. II take it
you're from New York;" he asked, inno-
Gently
YES growIed the fat man, with a
contemptuous glance, "l'm from New
/ York. /.
aWell.s went on the old farmer, do
You New York fellers each have his own
tooth brushg OR do all Of you scrub
your teeth with the same brush|
The New York man sputtered IN
speechless Indignation
you see the farmer went on mildly.
"a drinking glass that is used by every
body is just as bad as a public tooth
brush. SO we efauks out here in Kansas
passed law forbiddiug them in the
state.
Kansas has always been the singed eat
III the brotherhood Of states. Fifty
years ago its present place on the msp
was marked By a shaded reetangle, with
the legend, 4Arid Plains" In more re-
cent years. Kansas has suffered from
plaques Of grasshoppers. Pcpnlists,
whiskers. mortgages, hrmnorists and fic-
ton writer's Of the Dodge City and Sod
House schools. So that to-day when the
man IN the street thinks of Kansas he
winks at himself in the mirror and
grins Kansas What a joke
Getting of the train at some small
Kansas town with visions of cyclone
cellars and sod houses IN his eyes, he
win be met BY smart page IN buttons,
who carries his suit case across the
street To handsome hotel il the Eng
Ish timbered style where the service and
table is within five points of perfection.
Then when he orders his cocktail before
dinner he win be told that Kansas is a
prohibition state And presently one Of
the most startling and important things
about Kansas will begin to impress itself
on him:
Kansas is one state in the union where
the laws are actually enforced.
The casual guest winks at the page,
hands him quarter and says that Of
course he knows Kansas is a prohibition
state, but that he wants a cocktail just
the same Deity pocketing the quarter,
the page regrets that a cocktail is Inn
possible. His statement is endorsed by
the manager Of the hotel. The prohibit
ton law is really enforced IN Kansas.
So are the other laws No wonder the
state has reputation for crankinessl
What other people, for instance, ever
produced 4 state official who declined an
appointment as United States senator |
because he preferred to stay at home |
and write poems on pork. odes on oats |
and sonnets on alfalfa for circulation /
among a lot OF farmersg +. ID Coburn
ii the Kansas Horace and the bulletins
which are issued by the Kansas state
board Of agriculture under his direction
are SO different from any other similar /
documents dH u tdiot ftAt 914ta Va 1tAH7
pcions in the commonplace mind Of an
ordinary dry-as.dust, agricultural ex
pert Coburn's productions are bound /
and printed in the style Of art booklets
and bear such alluring titles as "Alfal
fa's Affinity sThe Hogs Happy Hab-
itat,7 and "The Lay of the Helpful /
Hem also the convincing facts and fg
ures which Cobnrn knows so we'll how to
presents are spieed with bits OF verse
all, like the hogs and poultry, native I
products Of the Kansas soil First is
printed a table, showing that according
to the national government an average
Kansas hog is worth more actual cash
than a porker from any other state in
the union. Then, just below the figures.
Walt Mason. the Enporia bard, bursts
INTO song
Kansas: Where we've torn tho shackles
From the farmers Leg
Kansas: Where the hen that caekles
Always LAYS an egg;
Where the cows are fairly aehiu'
To 20 on with record hreasin'
And the hogs are raising bacon
By the key"
Prom @Those Kansas Cranis,I byl