The Greenville morning herald. [volume] (Greenville, Tex.) 1890-1956, 1910-11-15
A VERY NICE
PROFESSOR
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1910. 10y Associated Lit
orafy Press,

III NNAIN tlhatat III
lL---------------- |
When Professor Watson took the
stage at Ellsworth to ride over to Dia.
mondvilo the lnukccper liked his looks
and talk. He hadn't been in the vii
lage q day when We MI liked his looks |
and talk lie was a little, roly poly /
man of fifty and gave out that he was
professor of metaphysics in New |
England college His age was about |
fifty. and he carried smile on his 1
face that would have pulled crocus |
out of the ground n month ahead OF
time.
In Diamondvillc lived the Widow
Steadmau. She was forty years old !
and well off. She was being courtcd
by the town constable. who was nm
old bachelor 1t was said they were
engaged, but the arrival of the very
nice professor wrought change In
n week he had made her acquaintance
and was calling on her. In fort
night the nose Of the town constable
was out of Joint The professor mp
pcnrcd TO be Ia the best of health but
he claimed that metaphysics had bro
ken him down and that he had come
to the village for rest
The constable was called stupid as an
onicer-good hearted but stupid. We
hadn't sized him up correctly MS to
the stupid part. AS soon as he
discovered that lie was being thrown
down he began to study the profes
sor lie wrote to half a dozen col
legcs ard WIS told that they had ncv
er hes rd uf the man BY accident he
got hold of ii paper that put him on
the right trail. He went mp to the
city and had talk with the police
one June day the stage from the
railroad rolled in, and It's cargo con
sisted OF eleven women. They might
have been said to be of all ages, sexes
and colors AS the vehicle halted at
the inn Professor Watson sat on the
veranda. He was put under arrest by
n detective and the constable as he
sat. but he got on his feet and raised
his hat eleven different times to the
eleven females Some cried out AZ
sight of him. some smiled. and some
shed tears. After replacing his hat
the professor shook hands with the
eleven, beginning Mt the head OF the
line and saying:
My dear, your name Is Hannah If
/ ! remember and, though your call Is
! unexpected, you are nevertheless vel
| come"
Then he took mp the case of Jane
Betsy Mary, and so on, Every wo
I man there was his wife, and wife he
had abandoned, and yet he carried
I that smile and his nerve right through
| It. He was taken to Jail and the jaile
| said lie was one of the incest men II,
ever met The officers had casr
/ against him blgger'n house. He had
practced bignmy for twenty years
/ He had married girls, spinsters, wild
ows ana old women. one Of the vic
tins was sixty-nve years old He had
got money from some of them, but it
didn't seem as IL that was his motive
AS he explained it:
"Why. | just fell in love, and shc
fell in love, and we were married
Really, / didn't know had married s.
many"
And when the women We're asked tt
explain they answered.
why, he's such very, very nice
man that we couldn't help IT. Hes
Just too sweet for anything"
And, would you believe 1t, the Widow
Steadman, who would have made the
twelfth, was the first one to send him
n bouquet and her sympathies after he
had been locked up!
The professor hadn't gone far afleld.
He had done all his marrying within "A
radius of 200 miles. He had mude a
nice. kind husband while It lasted He
had painted kitchen floors, washed
dishes and whitewashed cellars. Yes,
the officers thought they had him dead
to rights, but they soon learned to the
contrary. Only one woman out of the
eleven was willing to swear against
the man. The county had the whole
/, gang on its hands 10 lodge and board.
The wife who was willing to do II
was an old maid and SO bony and
homely as TO excite general remark
For time she was fierce 10 send tie
little man to place where the dogs
couldn't bite him. None of the ten
, others would speak TO her. She was
, sent for by tue professor. When she
| had arrived Mt the jail. determined
: that his cajolery should not move her,
he held out his arms TO her and said:
Birdie, you cant find 1t In your
heart to do It. You are too noble aud
generous. II | hadn't seen the nobility
, OF your character in yonr face ] should
, never have trusted my happiness in
, your keeping"
, She believed him and fell on his
shoulder and wept When the trial
} WINS at last called not one Of the cley
!. en- was complainant when put on the
stand MS witnesses they were no good
They perjured themselves, and they
wrlggled and twisted and made all
sorts OF excuses for the man, and the
Jury had 10 strain point 10 convict
him. He got n sentence Of three years
Q and before being taken to prison he
G had interviews with the eleven In sue
e cesslon, and to each one he said
Never mind, darling Three years
Z will soon pass away, and then we vii
be with each other again to part never
more"
a And the constable didn't marry thu
4 Widow steadman. She said he WASH
u even little bit nice and that # wa
G none Of his business how many wive'
the very very nice Professor Watson
had.
To the Ladies'.