Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1910-08-24
BILL" JUST in
FROM FUNERAL
Good STORY in G. N. Circles---Joke
on Officials Who Wanted 10
Break Records from Spokane
MAD Run Through Canyons.

'--Mad KUN lnrOugh canyons.
A good story is going the
rounds in Great Northern railway
circles, which is said to have its
foundation a few weeks ago at the
expense of number of prominent
officials and stock holders of the
system, who were making an in
spection trip over the line. AS the
story goes, William Watson, who is
better known to the boys along the
line as "Stuttering Bill' because
of an impeachment in speech, and
who had put in several years on the
mountain divisions, was :called to
Spokane to take charge of the
engine that was to pull the special
which had been scheduled to eclipse
all former time made over the
mountains in order to show the
stockholders the good condition of
the roadbed.
Mr.. Watson is said not only to
be better acquainted with every
grade, single and double, than any
other engineer in the Great North
ern service, but he is also credited
with being the most reckless run
ner' on the entire system.
Just as he was climbing into the
cab of the big compound engine at
Spokane, which was to break all
speed records. the conductor called
his attention to the fact that he
must not fail to make the time
scheduled for the run. This is
where Bills peculiarities displayed
themselves. He did not deign to
answer the conductor, but reaching
for the throttle, opened it so wide
that the ticket puncher came near
being left behind to take his meals
at the lunch counter instead of at
the tables provided with all the
toothsome viands of the market for
the guests Of the company.
For the first fifty miles Bill more
than maintained his reputation as
the most fearless engineer ever on
the system, then something hap
pened. The engine began to cough
like consumptive in the last stages
of the disease, and while the
steam gauge registered 100 pounds,
the train kept losing time until it
arrived at a station thirty five
minutes late.
The conductor, who had not yet
recovered from his displeasure at
nearly being left behind, rushed
ahead to learn the trouble. "Bill, ;"
he said. what the blankety blank
is the matter. are you losing your
nerve? Here you are IS minutes
late and the old man. is growing
wrathy. What do you mean? Do
you think you are going to a
funeral?"
Bill said nothing, gazed at the
blue-coated official in contempt and
proceeded to replace an eccentric
that had worked loose and slipped
out of position.
After a delay of ten minutes
putting the train as minutes be-
hind-the warning signal for start
ing was given and the impatient
passengers were soon whirling over
the road with a rapidity that made
them dizzy and caused the shivers
to dance up and own their spinal
column like California feas chasing
the tourist over the deserts.
Sixty-eight miles in 81 IL min
utes and then the train stopped to
coal and water. This time not only
the conductor, but several officials
rushed ahead to jump "Stuttering
Bill' for his mad run down through
the canyons where reverse curves
were the order, and where, had the
train left the track, it would have
been dashed down into gulches a
thousand feet below the road bed.
The conductor was the first to
reach the engine, and in language
that burned up his words with sui.
phurous luridness, he exclaimed.
"You -- idiot! What did
you mean by working steam dowr
that m0,1ntain and foor;n0 thro,,ot