Heppner gazette. [volume] (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912, 1910-10-27
By M. QUAD


tavern keeping easy and profitable. 1t
wasn't six weeks before he learned to
the contrary. 1t was easy enough. for
he had nothing TO do, but lie looked In
vain for the profits.
One summers day Uncle John sat
dozing and thinking. 1t was hot day.
and the town was dead. Nothing
buzzed but the flies. Uncle John
would have been asleep in Ave min
Utes more but for the arrival of a
stranger on foot. The arrival was
dusty and ragged. II he wasn't u
tramp then Uncle John never saw one.
He was motioned to so around to the
kitchen for a cold bite, but he sat
down and said:
"A little business talk with you first.
and then Ill take the best room 10 the
house and eat my meals In the dining
room"
Il can't hire no tramps." said Uncle
John.
But it may be that shall hire you.
Lead the way"
The fellow had a compelling way
with him Uncle John led the way
upstairs, and he picked up his bundle
and followed. AS they entered room
he locked the door on them and then
sat down for talk.
When the talk was finished he
brought shears and razor and cut the
strangers hair and shaved him. Then
the old bundle was opened and fair
Iy decent suit brought out What 1t
lacked was supplied by mine host. Re-
suIt-a decent looking guest instead
Of disreputable tramp. He appeared
downstairs Just after the train came
in, and Mrs. White thought he came
By It. So did the villagers who strag-
gIed in after supper for glass of beer
and o bit Of gossip. John Taylor had
arriTed-best room in the house-paid
a week in advance-no doubt man Of
meanS-was mum as to his business
probably had some big enterprise on
hand. 1t was two weeks before the
nature of that enterprise was learned.
Uncle John had to sell a horse first.
and advertisements had to be written
and placed. 1t was also necessary for
the editor of the local paper to make
writeUp. The advertisement inserted
in various newspapers read:
"a would be philanthropist stands
ready to make a gift of S1.000000 for
the best interests of society. but would
like personal advice. No letters. Shall
it be colleges. schools, asylums. hos
pitaIs. homes or gifts to widows?
Then the name of Mr.. Taylor and
The village were given. Uncle John
was running a ten room tavern-that
is. only ten out of the forty rooms
were furnished. He bought. hired and
borrowed furniture for the other thirty
rooms. He bought crockery and cut
lery and hired a cook and waiter.
He ordered extra kegs Of beer and
raised his rates from 81 day to just
double. 1t took sand to do 1t. Mrs.
White was not let into the secret, and
she almost went crazy.
One day ten strangers got of at the
depot and asked for Taylor. The next
day there were twenty. On the third
day Uncle John had to distribute his
guests around among the villagers. He
was here. there and everywhere. look
ing for judgment day. As for Mr.
Taylor, he was cool-cool and smiling
He had Office hours from a. m. to Z
d. m. He gave each patient one
hour. That made eight per day. The
rule was rigid, and the others must
wait. Therefore a conner might have
to wait FIVE or six days for his inter
view. Meanwhile he had to, eat and
sleep and pay 81 per day.
Strangers who knew just how that
million ought to be expended to dc
the world the most good kept coming
by every train. There was no otheI
tuvern; there was no other Mr.. Taylor
there was no other place in towr
where beer and cigars were sold. Col
Ieges, hospitals. asylums and every
sort Of public institution sent repre-
eentatIYes. Politicians came to ge
that million TO start reform. Men came
who wanted TO found new religions
Widows wanted cash, and township.
and counties wanted highway i'm
movements. For two months they
came and went. They slept where
they could and ate what was set be
fore them. Then the tide began tC
thin out, and there was more adver
tlsfng- This time the advertisement
read:
ANY inventor having a good thing
or any person having an idea that car
be turned into cash viii find man and
money ready"
And then it was the rush all over
again Inventors brought their models
and there was a barn full of them
Others brought their ideas. and they
were too numerous to be listed. Fol-
FIVE long months Uncle Johns tay-
ern hadn't room or a place at the
table to spare. Then along came a
man TO buy him out
"Sen and get out" advised Mr.. Tay-
Tor.
The advice was followed.
Now we win figure up and whack
up
II was done. Mrs. White smiled.
Uncle John rubbed his hands. and
the stranger grinned Uncle Johns
tavera has a new name and a new
proprietor now. II is not a forty room
favrrn auv more II Is A FIVE room