The Holbrook news., 1910-05-20
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l ' in cantata?" I'd jump at the chants. Louisville Courier-Journal
 Artist-It's, a good thing to hunger for fame. Model-Yes, for if you don't get the fame you're sure to get the hunger,
 Bill-Did xau ever try my doctor? JdM-Oh,. yes; don't you remember when was sick for such long timer -Yonkers Statesman
 Can you tell me how can keep a naid?" Madame, you are in the wrong place. The embalmer's is next dOor."-Buffazo Express
 T can recommend this horse. sir. said dealer, as a strong. sound ani- mal." Ut must be-" agreed the GUS. toner. ito, have attained it's present sge,"
 ''Lottie, what would. you do if you, work up some night andl found a burg lar in your room?" If he was hunt ing for money I'd get up, and help himl hunt. t."-LiFe.
 Fathen-You are. marrying my daughter for love, yoiu say? But she get S0yO00 marks dowrw. Suitor-Well. that can't be avoided. ean it? File gende B1atter.
 'lmpatience.' said Uncle Eben, "is, gineral1@ de feelin you has when you wants somebody else to hurry an make. up folh de time yon'S been wastinl.' - Washington Star.
 Fathar-What, Non want to- marry my daughter? Why, sir, you can't support her. I can hardly do it my self. Suitor (blankly) -C-can!5 we chip in together?
 Gentleman (hirfng valet)-Then understand you to have some Knoml- edge of barbeping You've cut hair, of oN.-Boston Standard
 He lives on the fat of the and.~ said a man to a friend, indicating a passer-by in the street "TXhat busi- ness is he in@~ Hes the propgfekor of an anti-fat remedy!"
 Why, Henry. How does it happen that you can't spell even the simplest words?" ~l can't spell 'em if they ain't in our spellin' book. can I?"- Cleveland Plain Dealer.
 Here's 8 remarkable gold coin want to show you, ola man." "Eh? This is an ordinary half-eagle. What's remarkable about it?" 'It belongs to me'+B0ston Transcript
 Mrs Hutton-We are organizing a piano club, MT. Flatleigh. Will you doin us? Flatleigh-w With pleasure. Mrs. Hutton. What pianist do yon propose to club frst?-Tit-Bits.
 Knicker-What's Smiths idea of himself? Bocker-He doesn't think anybody else can do thing he can do. and he doesn't think anybody else can do thing he can't do.-Puck.
 The father-Did mamma punish you to-day. Tommie? The boy-Yes, sir. What did she do?" Made me stay in the house while she was taking her singing lesson Statesman.
 Wigwag-What, rosesl Don't you know a girl never marries the fellow who sends her flowers? Oldbach- Sure I do That's why always try to keep on the safe side.-Philadelph Record.
 Sufferer-Doctor, don't you think that a change to a warmer climate would do me good? Specialist-Good gracious. mani That's just what I am trying to save you from!-Nsw York Times.
 Tommie was about to have a chill dren's party. Mother he said thoughtfully, ''it won't look we'll for me to be stuffing myself when those other children are here. How will it be if eat my share before they conner"
 50 when Bella rejected Jack. he went immediately and proposed to best of it. What do you think? He gave Maud an order on Bella for the engagement ring"-Boston Tran script.
 Did you ever have appendicitis?" said the insurance man. ''Well,@ answered the skeptic, 'I was operated on But never felt sure whether it was case of appendicitis or case of professional curiosity.-Washing ton Star.
 Some men are so queer" And you are going to tell me of one particularly queer one" 'fYes. It's MT. Barberton. His wife used to beg him for nickels and dimes, and now he's cheerfully paying her a hundred a week for ali Plain Dealer.
 "I hope you will be interested in wonder gentleman" said the hostess. 'T have assigned him to take you out to dinner" q shall be-" responded the lady addressed. That gentleman was formerly my husband and he's be- hind with his alimony."-Washingto CD. O. Herald.
 Woggs-You seem to be very proud of your youngest son. He must be very remarkable youth. Boggs-He is. Judging from the papers, 1 think he ;- +ho onIxr h0u in tho por1n-