The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1910-06-11
Fables Of Convention


Once upon a time there was a man
who wore q straw hat down town on
the 18th OF April.
A heinous thing TO do, no doubt,
nevertheless there were extenuating
circumstances that will doubtless ap
pear. duly card-indexed, when the
f, recording angel is called upon loi
evidence In the matter.
K. G.: II had been beastly not iof
week.
The mans everyday Fedora having
been changed from Alpine style 10
telescope once too often, wasn't M
To wear.
His Sunday-gotomeetin lid was at
the hatter's.
His straw hat. cool and appealing,
hung in tempting obviousness before
him as he surveyed the hat rack
The forecast for the day read this
way: Fair and continued warm.
Light soufherly winds"
What the do l care what they
say" said the man. Its going TO be
hot as - today."''
so he clapped on his straw hat and
went down town.
Now the hat was a perfectly good
and presentable hat, of conservative
model, and quite clean, the man hav-
ing bought II for half price during the
latter part of the preceding August.
Nevertheless, the populace jeered at
II.
A huet and cry was raised. Pipe
the straw lid," cried a newsboy. Men,
affecting TO be talking about some
thing else, made transparency insult
ing remarks about the straw hat In
the presence of the wearer thereof.
Others, even men who had never been
introduced to him. asked OF him, In
dithyrambic numbers, Where did you
get that hat?" and his warmest
friends rallied at him because OF It.
AS a result Of this popular cutlery
the man became involved In q hand
to-hand struggle with another person
on the corner of Main and First-sts.
In the course OF this struggle the man.
being throttled, bit of the tip of the
other persons ear, by way of counter
action.
policeman saw the fight.
The police Judge, being especially
busy next morning. and In something
Of hurry to get out to the country
CluD iOI iuuCHtOu, uibpObcu VI Tic
case OF the Man Who Wore the Straw
Hat In the brief span OF seven min
utes and forty-nine seconds the police
man proving a splendid witness, and
the man himself Nobody In Particular
The culprit got 80 days and costs
Forty-two days later the Man Who
Wore the Straw Hat sat on a bench
In park and made an inventory OF
things. He had lost his job his friends.
his grip. his sand, his hope. His head
was bloody and bowed, too. The fell
clutch OF circumstances" had his goat
His assets consisted OF a dime, a red
cent, various pawn checks, and one
nickel-plated, 32-caliber revolver. This
he had hesitated to pawn. A revolver
Is strangely companionable thing to
a lonesome man.
He held the dime and the penny In
his hand. He was wondering whether
II would be better to get something
TO eat with the dime, or, perhaps,
something to drink, or to-
There are places. you know, where
they will occasionally break boxes OF
cartridges for you; where one can get
as few as a dozen. or even a half dog
en-, II so few will suffice for ones
needs.
The man smiled a grim little smile.
He fingered the lone penny.
Heads | eat" he said.
He tossed the coin.
Bending above the dusty place
where the little bit of bronze had fall
len, he looked long and fixedly, with
something OF mystery in his eyes, at
a metallic wreath of oak leaves en-
circllng the simple legend:
ONE CENT"