Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1910-01-28
A MARX TWAIN Story
STATEMENT SHOWING WHAT
MAY BE ACHIEVED BY NERVE
AND RElTERATloN.
LESSON IN PERSEVERANCE
FROM NOTED HuMoRlsT
Going to Prove That Repetition Will
Work Wonders if Man Has Only
the Necessary Amount of Cheek to
Stand Up and Keep on Taking.


Stand Up and Keep on TaIkina.
Mark Twain once told a reporter |
that if a man says the same thing of |
ten enough people will begin to listen |
to him.
"Now," said the great humorist
'there was that story about Hank
Monk. That was the Oldest, stalest,
driest, deadest bit of alleged humor
that any man ever hearcs 1t had been
circulated around Nevada and Cali
fornia until there wasn't man left
who would even listen to it. I had
heard it so many times that knew it
by heart. 1t told how Hank Monk got
Horace Greeley over the Glennbrook
grade to Placerville.
II was about to deliver my second
lecture at Platt's hall in San Fran
cisco-the second one l had ever de-
| livered. 1t occurred to me that
might begin that lecture with the
worst story had ever heard and by
telling it often enough start the lee
ture with a big laugh. l took that
story and memorized it so that it
would not vary in the telling, and l
made it just as pointless and just as
dull and just as dry as l could.
when it came time for me to talk
/ stood up and with few introduce
tory remarks began that story. If
remember it went something like this:
"'Horace Greeley once went over
the Glennbrook grade to Placerville.
When he was leaving Carson City he
told the driver, Hank Monk, that he
had an engagement to lecture at
Placerville and was very anxious to
go through quick. Hank Monk crack
ed his whip and started off at an aw-
full pace. The stage bounced up and
down in such terrific way that it
jolted the buttons all off Horace's coat
and finally shot his head clean through
the roof of the stage, and then he yell
ed to Hank Monk and begged him to
go easier-said he warn't in as much
of hurry as he had been awhile
ago. But Hank Monk said Keep
your seat. Horace, and I'll get you
, there on time" And he did, too-what
was left of him.
"Now, that was all there was to the
story. 1t was bad enough to begin
, with, but I made it worse in the tell
. ing / droned it out in fiat, monoto-
!, nous tone, without gesture to mar its
:, depressing effect. The people received
it in dead silence had insulted every
man in the audience had 'graveled
them with story that was not only
stale and pointless, but one which they
had heard at least thousand times
= / waited few seconds for the laugh
= ter, and then I began to hem and haN
- and shift my feet l tried to appear
Just as embarrassed as l could, ant
after foundering about helplessly for ;
:. few sentences cheered up little ant
said that I would tell funny anec
dote which might be new to them. /
= began:
:, ".Horace Greeley went over thu
Glennbrook grade to Placerville'-
. 81 told it in exactly the same miser
= able, pointless way that had told i
before, and when got through l wait
ed longer time for the applause, bu
there wasn't any applause. I could SCI
that several men in the house wer
growing quite indignant. They hat
:, paid money to hear a humorous lee
= ture. 1 took a long breath and plunged
in third time, more embarrassed ant
!, fustered and worried than ever, an,
- by and by / worked around again t
- the time when Horace Greeley wen
over Glennbrook grade to Placerville.
- "This time some Of the smarter one
began to laugh, and this encourage
=. me so much that thanked them an
q started right in to tell the story owe
- again, never varying the delivery S
- much as pause to take breath. Th
>. fourth time fetched 'em, and at TIL
- end of the story they stood up an
:, whooped and yelled and cheered fo
-, some time.
= "You see, l thought that If ma
had sand enough to stand up before a
audience and tell the oldest, stales
y. and most uninteresting story in til
o. world he could make people laugh
y he had the nerve to tell the story ofte
I'd enough. The rest of my lecture wer
very well. They We're willing to laug