The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1910-08-18
De S-To THOMAS S. RICE.
CRedakJoro Pr Sportoj)

Nix That's not our opinion Of I'm
pire KERN, but our title in Esperanto
Game with Cleveland today at p m
This is The day the Esperantists gath
er at the ban yard 10 see the great
American game as she is played They
viii also hear some English as she Is
spoke They VIII see Larry L4aJoie- but
won't hear him, because he does not
have much TO say. Harry CollifOwer
ard Bill Evans viii be the two umps,
and the Esperantists viii hear kind
words for them before the game begins
Later, If the game happens TO go wrong.
they wiz hear how Ubiquitous human
berg can be without being struck by
lightning, but as most Of the delegates
spCak not the English. the babbIe viii
sound 10 them like Luther Mc1IiIIen
reading an essay on the improvement
OF the American racehOrse in ChOctaw.
Got any loose changer The price OF
the baseball rules in Esperanto is only
duonSpesmilO, and it's well worth IL
There are q lot Of nice things IN the
book that can be told an umpire. TO
the relief Of your feelings without q
policeman being able TO swear you used
improper language in public
President Tom Noyes has made ar.
engagements 20 have the Esperan5ists
10 sit Jogethe-. and VIII tell them how
fares the battle This viii be a big
help, for Mr. Noyes Is as one having
authority and can chase away jim
O'Day if Jim thinks the strange words
smack OF a riot and tries TO fan our
eminent guests out or the park Jimmy
3fcAleer said ne would be around %
inquire rEe Esperanto word for shilIalah-
We are going 10 md out the EspeT-
antO for hope OF the white race and
use Il as blessed relief from the Eng
1sh Of IL
Esperanto has no swear words, hence
Il would he useless 10 discuss Umpire
KERN in that language As the army
II Flanders acquired a wide reputation
Tor fluent Remuneration. We are think
ing Of learning Flemish against the next
time KERN comes here, so that We may
have q fitting medium IN which TO make
casual comments upon this particular
arbitrator KERN is a wonder When
Bob JuglaU5 was plUnked on the head
by q pitched bah guElaUb says KERN
would not allow him to take his base,
because u was slow ball The pro
vision that . man should not take his
base II hit By a slow ball has been
wiped out OF the book even IN the Es-l
peTauTO edition, so where does KERN
get OFF, Fine business for an umpire
who spends hale his time behind the
plate, and IS likely 10 have to adiUdi-
cate four or five cases OF men hit by
the ball In the same game The further
charge by KERN that TngIaub did not
Try 10 avoid the ball IS absurd Bob
Is willing enough 20 help his batting
average by taking = poke in the ribs,
but he has not Yet reached the az
vanced stage Of headworlZ where ne
would stick the hack OF MS noodle IN
the way OF q shoot IN order TO save q
time at bat KERN was IN bad all
around, and when Umpire Tommy Con
molly reversed him Connolly did the
Cnly sensible thing possible
The genial and generous M Decker
VIII dispense his usual line Of hand
picked, selected peanuts today at kvia
CendOj-
KERN is the brilliant genius who gotI
into trouble here last year In mucn the
same way one afternoon when Washing
ton was playing St Louis On the third
strike, with a man ON first base and one
or none out the batter famed The
third strike went by the catcher and
hit the umpire KERN not only allowed
the runner 10 advance. but gave the
batter first base despite the fact that
under the rules the batter -aS out as
soon as the strike happened. irresneC-
tive ~ what became OF the BAN after Il
passed the plate There was a trsnIen-
doUs howl and Joe CautiIlOn threaten
ed 10 protest the game. but never did
Fine work for a major Lacquer
In Esperanto KERN would be desig-l
mated -kapO faTiIa q OStO-" Harsh
words but true. ESQerantists viii see
the point IN the Introduction to the base
bail rules
We have with Us today as umpire
Harry CCllifoWer. q native son Of our
1aiT city Harry has recently broken
into the American League on the rec
ommendatiou OF q host Of Washington
friends, and IL IS q Ci1ch that he cannot
be worse than some OF the talent with
whom we are now afflicted de has lis
nerve with him. and from the number
Of intricate, CeChuicor questions ne pro-
pounds in the winter time we imagine