The St. Mary banner. (Franklin, Parish of St. Mary, La.) 1889-1931, 1910-07-16
SHEAR
NONSENSE,

/ VA|lVAyIlVAJLl \
They've a new preserve IN Boston
THAT so?" Yes; the subway JAM
Boston Herald.
Il started farming on a capital q 4
one dollar Il started on a packag
OF free seeds sent me by Congres% \
man. Louisville Courier Journal.
Mrs. YOungW ife-'What have yM F.
ever done to prove your love for me-
Mr.. Misunderstanding, I've Con-
tracted a lovely case Of chronic dys
pepsia. Judge.
will your son take a full college
course?" mo, not quite. He will have
baseball football and track athletiS
but he fears there won't be time for |
basketball. "-Cleveland Leader.
Muggins-"That boy of yours Seems
to be a hustler. He's never idle
Buggins-'I guess that's right. WhA
he hasn't anything else to do he eaa /
something "-Philadelphia Record.
Miss Highbrow-'E verybody's al
fected by environment, don't ym /
Think" Mrs. Lowbrow-"I am, Il
am, | know. That's the reason | nevs
touch the stuff. "-Cleveland Leader.
She says the average poet is an IN.
kempt hungry-looking individual
THAT so?" Yes, don't it make You
angry? You are poet But, myl
dear fellow. l am not an average
poet. Houston Post.
What's that prima donna angry
about?" 'Oh, some well-meaning crit.
ic said she sang like a siren. The
only siren she knows anything about
is the whistle they use on a steam
boat. "-Washington Star.
Il saw that member of the Legisla-
ture taking notes." said the observant
statesman. Very foolish Of him." re-
piled the constituencies schemer. 1T
isn't safe to handle anything except
cash. Washington Star.
THE boy who stood on the burning
deck was a brave lad Yes" replied
the school teacher; "he doesn't ap-
pear to have been nearly so scared as
some of the boys who have since been
called on to recite about him" Wash.
ington Star.
Griggs-''You talk a lot, Briggs;
now what have you got against mar
ried life?" Briggs-''What have | got
against it? Why. may, take this ter.
rible divorce evil; it fiourishes
amongst married people exclusively
Boston Transcript.
please shake your head, Mr.. Pike
said the young lady's small brother
"All right, Tommy. Now, what did
you want me to shake my head for"
PA said you was a rattle Drained
idiot, but | didn't hear nothin' rattle
did you?"-Birmmgham Age Herald
Have you ever tried a fireles;
cOoker?" Yes. We've had one for six
months. My wife has tried to fire
her, and I've told her to go, but she
simply ignores our requests, and says
she'll scratch the eyes out of any 9TH /
er girl we dare to bring into the
kitchen. "-Chicago Record-Herald
Telegraph Operator-"The chap who
just went out wanted to pay me $
cents for a 25-cent message" Umu
Manager-"Who is he? Pittsburgh .
millionaire?" Telegraph Operator
No; he's poet, and he counted tho Z
syllables instead of the Words
Judge
His Mammal don't know what %
do with Willie. He wants to be
newspaper man, but he has no talent
for writing" His Uncle-"That's all
right. Buy him copy of Joe Millsrs
Joke Book and a list of the Unita
States Senators, and we'll get him ;
job as Washington correspondent
Puck.
Brother Enaw-"How am 20 0
gittin' along in his new job as Pun
man po'tah?" Brother Smoot-"F!nA
sab! Dat boy Kin make few pass
and put mo- dust on a pusson dan m
brushes on, and it didn't take him wv
weeks to learn to slam a do p
way dat nobody but railroad mn
kin slam 1t. Yassah, Cla'ence Is sD
dom elegant. Puck.