New-York tribune., 1910-10-23

'OR OCTOBER 23. 1910
have few words with Herrnes in some quiet
corner, nobody would be the wiser.
1t was this last part of the program had
in mind as | was slzin' up Jales travelIn
costume. And say, how is it up there IN the
opodeldoc zone that they can get these high
water pant legs to fit so much like lengths of
Istovepipeo They was kind of a bilious brown
and cut gen rous in the seat; but, as far as
real comic relief went. they wan IN it with
the cute little short tailed cutaway that he
sported above 'ern. Honest, that coat was
enough to make an eccentric song and dance
artist green in the eyes! And you can be-
| lieve me when | say didn't lose any time in
scootin 'ern down Fourth-ave. to dollar a
| day house patronized by some of our swellest
Texas buyers. My next move is to make
report over the phone.
jVEP got 'en both under loci, and key"
1 says l to Marjorie. Trouble to pick
| 'em out? All, it was pipe. Specimens like
that amt so common anyone could get
mixed if they knew what day to look for EN-.
Yes. the nephew's along. all right. His real
name is Jake. Well. Hernes if YOU insist
But, say. ask Miss Mildred if she wants him
delivered in the original package, or should
hire some open face clothes for him.
The decision is that Hermes must come IN
dress suit. and if he amt got any with him
Marjorie will send down one of Mr.. Roberts
old ones.
"Oh. I'm just dying to see him in evening
clothes." gushes Mildred over the WIRE Il
know he'll be perfectly splendid
MA be-" says |. ''Only don't forget the
collar luttons and studs for the dress shirt.
Sa;-, | won't dwell on the gay time | had
tryln' to keep that pair out of sight until
after dinner. Honest. if I'd been drivin the
monkey cage in circus parade I'd felt lot
better; for every fresh gink that pipes off
that vaudeville costume of Jake's has to
have his say about it. AT the hash house
where steers EN- up against a twenty-five
cent course dinner all the girl walters got to
gigghn' like they'd never seen freak before.
1t wouldn't have been so bad with just
Uncle Jerry, for he's wearin' an old black
whipcord that would pass IN the dark. and,
outside the rubber collar and the plated
watch chain looped across his vest, he didn't
have the crossroads tag ON him very plain;
but Jake might as we'll have had cowbells
tied to him. Maybe | want some relieved
too when we got back to the hotel and found
this outfit that the girls had sCraped together
and sent down.
Nov we'll fix you up for the theater and
high society, Jake" says /. by rights you
ctSht " IistNt Soiiit Ol tilttl litCh ilt1Ilp
sheared off; but | don't dare let a barber
loose at you. for fear Mildred wouldn't
know you after he got through. She raved
a lot about that hair of yours Jake
You go on now, Smartvl" says .Iaby boy.
GRIMM expansive. Think I'm goin' to
wear duds like therno
You do if YOU appear out again with
me" says |. $50 peel the butternut regalia
and lemme see if l can harness YOU up in
these
"Hee-haw!' remarks Uncle Jerry. LET
him fix you up real harnsome. lake
Maybe that's what did; but | wouldn't
want to swear to it. Anyway. got him into
the dress shirt by main strength That was
the first struggle. Then, while Uncle Ierrv
held HIM gaSpin and groanin on the floor.
buttoned the high collar on and fastened
the white tie. Next We ended him up ON his
feet and pulled on the display vest and the
long tailed coat.
"Ug-g-gh. 1t chokes sonethin' awful"
says Jake. gettin' purple faced and pancky
An, close that pie gangway of yours and
breathe natural for a ninute'" SAYS l.
- Ihfr,. ~ h.,