The Holbrook news., 1910-03-18

My brother broke his leg yester- day" Accidentally" We presume so. He had nobody to spite Kansas City Journal.
 Here's a picture that my aunt painted" said Mrs. Keephouse, show ing visitor through the fiat Its pretty frame. though. h."-Newark News.
 Sapleigh-The doctor says there's something the matter with my head. Sharp-You surely didn't pay a doc tor to tell you that!-Boston Tran script
 This advertisement savors of pessi- mism." Whats that?" Gentleman offers to exchange a Christmas present for something useful" ."-Kansas City Journal.
 Bill see a man is trying to drift across the 4. ctic Circle. Where do you suppose he'll bring up? Jill-Oh, on the lecture platform, probably Yonkers Statesman.
 had been divorced?" Well, I don't know. A good deal would depend on what she had been doing with her ali mony."-Chicago Record-Herald.
 He-So your husband has given up smoking? It requires a pretty strong will to accomplish that. She-Well, I'd have you understand that I have a strong will.-New Zealand Free Lance.
 The Conversationalist (to we'll known authoress)-I am so delighted to meet you-it was only the other day-I saw something of yours-about something or other-in some paper!- Sketch.
 Did you have any assistance when you made your appearance as a sing er?" Yes" answered the amateur soloist. There was policeman keep ing order in the gallery" Washing ton Star
 The Lady Fare-You can not cheat me, my man. I haven't ridden in cabs for twenty-five years for nothing. The you, mum? We'll, you've done your best.-New Zealand Free Lance.
 "I was nearly killed yesterday" What happened?" T was having tea in the garden when an airship passed over with one of those didn't-know-you- fools in it!" = St Louis Republic.
 Mrs. Younglove John, are you aware that you haven't kissed me for a week? MT. Younglove-Y-yes. darl- ing. I was just waiting to see how long it would take you to notice it, Boston Transcript.
 Helen" said her mother, If you are naughty you can't go to heaven" We'll" said Helen, T can't expect to go everywhere. I went to Uncle Toms Cabin once, and to the circus twice." The Housekeeper.
 Sapleigh-Bah love, you know, an Idea has occurred to me Miss Pert Cinterrupting)-Pa me. MT. Sapleigh, isn't that more than mere I should call 1t an event. Boston Transcript.
 Her Father-Yesterday l won the prize in the lottery, and to-day you come and ask me for my daughters land. Suitor-Yes, you know, one bit If good luck always brings another.- Neggendorfer Blaetter.
 First Chauffeur-You're bum driv- IT, Second Ditto-Say, what I know bout automobiles would i'll library. yhof Ion't know about 'em would fill Club-Fellow.
 Travelling Salesman-Well, MT. Ja- 'ez, did you get in to see the Hudson fulton celebration? Farmer Jabez- Jo; I didn't come nigh the place, :ause dye know, don't believe either f 'em ever reached the pole!-Puck.
 Joynes-I tell you, Singleton. you ont know the joys and felicities of ontented married life. the happy flight f years, the long, restful calm of long have you been larried? Joynes-Just a month it-Bits
 T am going to embark in some sort DuS1AcSS, anu HdAS CO hAoU r you think there is much money in loving pictures?" There was for a sllow who moved a haif-dozen of urs," said the flat dweller. He harged us $1O.''-St. Louis Star.
 Tomorrow will be my birthday, the fair typewriter maid. and I'm going to take a day off." Huh!" sneered the bookkeeper. who ad loved and lost, why don't you Ike five years of as you did the last me you had a birthday?"-Chicago ally News.
 Can I get the silver service for the re department?" inquired the young an at the free library. "The what?' ,ked the girl at the desk. The sil- sr service for the fire department le questions they ask you when you