davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
FIERCE,

 Oh. the grind,
 The deadly, daily grindl A column still to fll, If one is well or ill:
 If one is glad or sad, Amiable or mad.
 Still stares him in the face That hideous yawning space. That's why he's always solemn, The chap who runs column. A DOUBTFUL COMPLIMENT. Tt is a pleasure sometimes to meet man who is stupid 'Y-e-e-e-s." Every now and then I get tired of listening to smart people, "Y-e-e-e-s" AS I said, before. it is a pleasure some times to meet a man who is stupid" Welt Do you want me to say. Thank you? 9? ss PAUL COOK. s-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

What is wanted is a square distribu- ton of the country's circulating medium The new Rockefeller foundation should take this subject in hand.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
Woman Burned to Death

Ocala Fla. March 10.-Mrs. Y. w. Jackson, wife of wealthy citizen of Electra, 20 miles from this place, was burned to death while fighting forest fires near her home today.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

chicago's fatness gives il immunity from snowslides. and the Chicago news papers are saving that now is the time 10 move in.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
a,u to Codifx Law..

washington, March 1O.-From the io,nt committee on the revision of laws senator Hepburn today reported bill nrovidine for the codification revision ana amendment of the laws relating to the judiciary.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Wade Ellis cannot induce all Ohio re- rublicans to sing in one key, and he is discouraged
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
CONSERVING HEART,

While it might be deemed too drastic Yet I think it wouldn't hurt If a statutory ruling
 Made it 'gainst the law to flirt.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The building of Dreadnought airships will be begun possibly this year-cer- tainly in 1911.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

John D. mas come to the conclusion that there is more enjoyment in giving than in grabbing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The retirement of Secretary Ballinger is suggested as freely and frankly as is the retirement of Chauncey NJ. Depew
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Bacon and eggs have parted. the for mer being as aristocratic as the latter is Becoming democratic.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Butterine is to be an issue In national policies hereafter. Cannon and Moxley, two of kind, did it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Senator Aldrich is hot under the collar because the peoples savings cannot be hurried to New York to buy ? per cents.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Japan has cut the price Of baseballs down one-half, and they make good balls.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The explorers who propose to climb Mount Mckinley next summer will carry a full supply of blank affidavits.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

Mr. Taft hopes to witness a whirl- wind baseball game soon, and he will then forget for a time his many trou- bles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The housefy begins to disport himself, regardless of the countrywide effort to eradicate hin
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The more the President courts Cannon and AidTich, the more the insurgents muss up his pet bills.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The Rockefeller foundation will still leave to the average man a few duties toward his fellow men.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

The Aldrich-central-b bank folly is by no means abandoned. It is Wall Streets fondest and most ambitious dream.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
Fine Fish in Market

'"The fish are in perfection just now, particularly fresh water fish and shad, said a man who is almost an epicure.
 '"The Savannah river shad are fresh and fine Shad roe is a delectable dish when we'll prepared. Many persons do not know that fish when thoroughly frozen lose some of the natural oil The pompano, which is taken in the semi-tropical waters of Mexico and Yucatan, are kept for weeks frozen. In fact they are thrown immediately into the ice pit on the fish ing vessels. Arrived at port they are transferred to ice bins. When shipped they are packed in ice. Most of the Span ish mackera in the markets have been thoroughly frozen. The shad and fresh water fish are shipped more promptly and are therefore more oily and nutritious
 ''rhere is nothing more delightful today than fried shad served with lettuce salad with egg dressing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

he is eating butter or Moxley com hound
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
ONLY WANT MONEY.

W IT. "I believe this Black Hand business is all a fake" Why"
 You never hear of a demand being made for anything valuable, like eggs or pork chops"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

These bright March days are call to the bat
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
Expects I.andsIide for O'NeaI

Being a business man and not politi- elan I have not been feeling the pulse of the people as to the gubernatorial con test, but O'Neal I feel sure will be nom- mated in the primary by large major ity, said w. B. Leedy.
 "o'Nears majority will be much larger even, than the majority we cast against the amendment last November. l haven't the least doubt about it.
 But for O'Neal there would have been practically no organized movement against the obnoxious amendment l opo- sItion. But for his initiative the radical element would have swept the staee O'Neal was the father of the Aonseo'n'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11
About Persons

Edward B. Garretson, president of Ed ward B. Garretson & Co.,. contractors, of Jacksonville, Fla. is in the city. MT. Gar retson will submit bids for portions Of the work at Corey.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

[ Enterted at the Birmingham, Aia, postoffice as second-class matter uiOe- act of Congress March 3, ls19
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-03-11

And when at last In snowy bed that careless crew were laid And quiet reigned throughout that little home, More happiness was there, I wis, by trouble undismayed, Than eer was bought with all the wealth of Romei
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
A SmokeIeSs Locomotive.

From The Springfield Republican.
The world is waiting for a gmokeIess
locomotive ana one burning bi,un1inous
coal has been developed in Chicago. A
group OF railroad men and members Of the
smoke committees from several cities re-
Gently saw the "DOylair smokeless loco
motive draw train Of cars from the
stockyards in Chicago a distance Of
twenty-eight miles without any DISPLAY Of
smoke or gas. and with but little firing
necessary 1t is claimed that the device
on the locomotive produces something
like perfect combustion. and thereby ef-
fects saving in fuel consumption of be-
tween IS and 90 per cent. This seems
almost too good TO be true and vet there
is no inherent impossibility in the claim
made. The fact that the outsiders who
witnessed the demonstration were greatly
impressed by IL Is most encouraging
This ought to be the beginning Of a de-
termined public demand that this smoke
less device be used on ali locomotives.
TO the speedy retirement OF the smoke
emitting nuisances that not only detract
from the pleasure of travelling. but sadly
pollute the air. 1t will be a great ri
umph for civilization when results like
those produced in this Chicago experi-
ment have become commonplace
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
a Naval Rumpus.

An extraordinary state Of affairs exists
in the Navy Department The effort TO
accomplish important changes in naval
administration appears to be attended
with results which have provoked per-
sonal estrangement and the termination
o. official relations in degree and OF a
character truly remarkable. This IS dis
closed in the recent hearing OF Paymaster
=. B. Rogers. head of the Bureau Of Sup
plies and Accounts, before the Senate
Naval Committee. That officer appeared.
with the permission Of the Secretary of
the Navy. to give testimony concerning
the naval supply fund and the new ac-
counting system al navy yards. The naval
supply fund has been a means Of ac-
cumulating stores which are drawn by
the various bureaus for doing work OF
fitting out vessels for service. Il has
been diminished by order OF the Score
tary Of the Navy by fve-sixths Of its
former proportions, upon the opinion Of
the Attorney General that its mainte-
nance as it has existed was Illegal. The
Paymaster General informed the Senate
Naval Committee that this was grave
mistake and would lead 70 expensive. II
not disastrous. consequences.
The subject is somewhat technical. but
it is evidently one Of vast Importance in
maintaining a reserve stock It is I'M
usual for a bureau chief to appear be-
fore a Congressional committee and seek
legislation to which the head Of a de-
partment is opposed. That is not the
only remarkable feature Of this sltus-
ton, however. The Paymaster General
Informed the committee that his efforts
70 obtain departmental action have been
unavailing- He added:
II have twice asked him dhe Secretary
OF the Navy in my letters 20 legalize
this enlarged naval supply fund to secure
from Congress a legalization Of what
consider the best piece Of accounting
work that has ever been performed in
the navy. and he has not only not done so
but he has not even answered the letters
in that particular"
The situation must indeed be acute
when the head Of the Navy Department
refuses 20 negotiate with one Of his bu-
reau chiefs. II that Is the immediate
effect Of the attempt TO TeOrganiZe naval
administration, there is great need. il
would appear. Of some effective inter
ference iH behalf OF the public interest
The conditions must be deplored by those
who realize that officials in responsible
place may fairly differ in opinion and
still be entitled 10 the civiIties Of Of
fetal intercourse. II does not -help any
cause TO have the head Of a department
refuse 10 act upon the recommendations
submitted to him. All suggestions COM
ing from an official source are entitled to
respectful consideration. although not
necessarily demanding approval. The dis
closure made by the Paymaster General
before the Senate Naval Committee is one
which adds nothing to the reputation OF
naval administration.
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
Pulpit Plagiarists.

Whether there is anything new under
the sun or not, there is little that is
original in everyday life. The fact IS
strongly presented to us at church. in
the theater, and in fiction. We ike origi-
nality. but its attainment is next 10 i'm
I possible. There are certain limitations.
and one Of these is TO confne ourselves to
the unities Of time. place, and action.
Hence the request Of Rev. DR.. Hugh /.
Elderdice before the graduating class Of
Westminster Theological Seminary that
young ministers be original is OF doubt
full value and open to argument.
Facts are facts. They cannot be evaded.
Deductions can be drawn: but there have
been brilliant men in the pulpits
of' former days. and they have pre-
sented practically all phases of life
and morals in concrete form and with
clear-cut language. What. then, shall the
young minister do? Shall he seek TO
solve problems that do not belong 10
the pulpit or that have no place in the
ology? Shall he become a mountebank.
and. by illogical effort. escape the beaten
path? Shall he ignore facts and let his
| fancy roam?
He need not be plagiarist simply be-
cause he uses ideas which are Of uni
versal application. Shakespeare did not
try to use original plots. but he did re-
| cast them in a mold which no other man
had used. He studied mankind and ma
ture, and adapted to his own use what
he found. It would be folly for poet
to read Shakespeare for the purpose of
avoiding touching on any topic mentioned
! in the works of the bard Of Avon.
SO it would be folly for a young min
lister to stand mp IN pulpit and try to
| tell the congregation something Of which
they had never heard. Better to repeat
the salient features which are incontro-
vertible. and then expatiate in his own
manner. THE same old story" told in
the same old way is the path to the heart
Of the hearer. We listen more attentively
to a subject of which we have some
! knowledge than 20 one that is entirely
new and on which we have had no OPP
portunity to pass judgment.
More and more is a certain liberty per-
mitted to the writer or speaker. He need
not strive for originality. He need only
/ present a subject in a clearer form than
| 1t was presented before. and he has done
]
does not claim originality. It IS taeitIy
admitted that the idea cannot be new.
II it were, it is probable It would lack
interest. Intellectual children" are not
a numerous progeny.
The minister VINO says only that which
has never been said before will have a
narrow field Of usefulness. He will not
be able 10 preach a sermon a week. nor
yet one a month.
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
How RnIIineer Hammered.

From the Springfield Republican.
II has often bee masked how President
TAFT happened to select Mr.. BaTinger for
his Cabinet Some have believed that the
Secretary Of the Interior was discovered
by Frank Hitchcock and recommended by
him to the President But Mr.. Ballincer's
own testimony may have cleared UP the
mystery. lie produced telegrams sent 10
him by President Roosevelt IN 1907. ask
ing him 10 become Commissioner OF the
Land Office. You must come and help
me out" wired Mr.. Roosevelt 10 Mr..
Ballinger. and Il deserve the helm OF
every man who believes in my way Of
doing things. Yielding 10 President
Roosevelts urgent perSuasions, Mr.. Bal
linger reconsidered his original decIina-
ton Of the Office. and accepted the offer.
When he reached Washington Mr.. Roose-
welt hailed him with the words: 'T have
no apologies to make. Rallinger. I'm
glad you are here. Any man who could
clean up Seattle as YOU did can clean I'D
that land Office Now. it occurs to us
that Mr.. Taft recalled Mr.. Roosevelt's
enthusiasm over Ballinger when he made
up his own Cabinet, and, wishing to
carry out the Roosevelt policies in the
Interior Department. he. too. summoned
the -~c,tle lawyer
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
SNAP SHOTS.

From the Dallas News
a word 20 the wise IS unnecessary.
Sometimes a stitch in time saves guvln'
The best way 20 keep your health is 10
avoid all the chances YOU have 70 lose II
The kind Of man who is satisfied with
himself rarely ever is satisfactory 10 any
one else.
About the easiest thing in this world for
a girl 10 do is 20 get ready 20 20 riding
in an automobile.
Probably. ~ the truth were known the
Venus Of Milo is no better of now than 4
she had worn corsets.
There Is scarcely anything a man can
become reconciled 20 as quickly as not
having anything 20 do.
There are fools Of various sizes. but the
biggest Of an is the one who doesn't profit
by the foOLshneSS or The Others
Our idea Of a brute is q woman's hus-
band who makes her mad right after SUD-
per SO he can read quietly tin bedtime.
About the hardest thing in this world
for a lunch counter waiter 10 believe is
that man who asks for a napkin isn't a
snoh.
The reason a schoolboy wants 10 STAY
in the house and get his lessons after
supper is because there is a big boy out
side waiting 70 lick him.
The kind Of boy who has never wished
he could play first base for the home
team ought 20 be watched. He NAV be-
come addicted 20 poetry.
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
TO-DAY IN HISTORY.
The Death of Napoleon-May S.

On May 8, 1921, Napoleon fought his last
battle and death closed the career Of one
.cf the greatest generals. If not the great
est the world has ever seen. The last
tragedy of his life was enacted on the
little island of St. Helena He was buried
in valley a simple slab marked the
place Of his repose; two weeping willows
waved over It, and an iron railing in
circled the spot Of ground
a few days before his death he awoke
one morning, saying: I have just seen
my good Josephine, but she would not
embrace me. She disappeared at the
moment when I was about TO take her IN
my arms. She is not changed She is
sull the same. full OF devotion 20 me-
She told me that we were about 10 see
each other again. never more 70 part"
The disease progressed rapidly and the
dying hour drew near. a violent storm
ragged with wild fury on that rocky prison
isle as the spirit Of the great Napoleon
was freeing itself from its earthly fet-
tiers. His few faithful friends who shared
his exile stood weeping around his couch
In the solemn silence Of that sacred hour
his loved voice was once more family
heard: France! Army, Head Of the
army! Josephine and the heart Of Ma
poleon ceased 10 beat isle Of Elba.
Napoleon" had been the last words Of
the loving and forgiving Josephine.
France. the army, Josephine" were the
last images that fingered in the heart and
the last words which trembled or the
lips of the dying Emperor.
The heart-melting story OF the hard
ships 10 which Napoleon had been sub
jected during his captivity at st. Helena
was told over and over again to his be-
loved France, till the nation al last rose
as one man to do his memory honor.
Just twenty-five years from the time
when Napoleon was landed captive
upon the island his sacred remains were
brought from their humble resting place
and reipterred in the magnificent mauso-
leum prepared for them in the Church OF
the InvAliaes. Paris. on the anniversary
OF the great victory OF Austerltz the two
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
The Colonel and the Tulips.

One Of the high mightinesses Of Haar.
lem put one over cleverly enough on the
colonel the other day.
The colonel was inspecting some par.
ticularly beautiful tulips on display al
a flower show. and the said high might.
ness was doing the honors more than
gracefully and leading the conversation
along with some adroitness. The colone
loved flowers? Oh. yes, indeed, The colo.
mel loved flowers with love that PASSED
by far that OF the man who invented
them. And tulips? All. tulipsl They were
the colonels favorite flowers. That mar
with no love OF tulips in his soul was al
for treasons. stratagems. and spells. Tu.
lips came with the budding springtime
they bespoke the resurrection Of nature
and all Of that
Whereupon, his high mightiness opinet
that America should go in for tulip cul-
ture generally and-particularIy-g
ously. To this end, his high mightiness
advanced the suggestion that the colo.
nel's dear native land might find this easy
enough and despite the increased
cost OF only the coloneTs hon.
orable )uld remove the duty on
Dutch h, now imposed by the
Payue-Aldli,h tariff law,
The coloneTs reply 10 this HolIandish
high mightiness probably was forwarded
by slow freight Al least 1t has not vet
been cabled over. II appears that we only
set something like 100000 pounds OF
bulbs from our Dutch friends every year
largely tulips, If we had more tulips. the
people would enjoy their springs ever 81
much more extensively. perhaps: and we
would have more tulips and cheaper tulins
if-as the high mightiness suggested to
the colonel,
Mr.. Roosevelt says he is immensely
proud Of his Dutch ancestry, and we are
quite prepared to believe him. Down in
his heart Of hearts we suspect he ad-
mired the nerve OF the high mightiness
who led him along so eleverly anept the
tulip and its uplifting and ennobllne at
tributes when thrust beneath the notice
ef discriminating and knowing people
But. as % the colonelg reply. You will
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
WHAT is A CONSTITUTIONS
Is IL Something to he Tempered
with or Replaced at VIII.

Is IL Something TO he Tempered
with or Replaced at VIII.
From the saturday Evening Post.
A long time ago the Texas legislature
passed a local option act under which
each community might decide for itself.
by ballot. whether il would have saloons.
For some reason the Supreme Court of
that ancient time held the act TO be I'M
constitutional This. however, did not
abate local antipathies 10 the saloon: so
the legislature passed several special acts
comforting the local option privilege upon
certain specified places which were de-
termined not 20 tolerate the liquor traffic.
Going 90 the legislature for special act
was inconveuieut. For this and other
reasons Texas became dissatisfied with
the old constitution But stiU being under
that strange delusion, common 10 all
States. that some sort Of cast-iron constl-
tuition was necessary Texas went 20 the
| trouble OF adopting a brand-neW one. To
provided, in effect, that every community
should. be privileged TO tolerate OF pro
hibit saloons as a majority Of the voters
might decide
! Lately a powerful agitation for State
wide prohibition has sprung up. But emil
ncnt lawyers assert that a Statewide
prohibition act would be unconstitutional
/ because It would squarely CONFLICT with
the local option clause Of the organic
| law as that clause guarantees local op-
ton, and Statewide prohibition would
leave no locality any option According
20 this well supported view. 20 achieve
Statewide prohibition the constitution
must be amended. which is far more DIFF
icult than the passing OF a simple pro-
hibitory statute by a majority OF the leg
[ islature
When a body OF by no means Inspired
| citizens sits solemniy down TO leCisIate
! for future generations, whose needs and
| circumstances they cannot possibly fore
/ see, by framing a cast-iron constitution.
the gods must fairly laugh their heads or.
The Washington herald., 1910-05-05
Teachers Retirement Fund.

The House District Committee acts
with wisdom in giving approval to the
teachers retirement bill 1t is wholly
meritorious. Washington should not be
behind other cities
The creation Of retirement funds for
public school teachers is rapidly gaining
popularity throughout the country. The
plans Of New York and Philadelphia, the
first cities TO establish such funds, have
been generally followed by other cities.
among which are Boston, Chicago, Buff
fslo. San Francisco. st. Paul and Gin
cinnau.
The movement began in New York
City about eighteen years ago. when the
teachers by a voluntary tax Of per
cent Of their salaries, raised the first
fund for this purpose. The city now
contributes annually per cent Of all
excise money. about s3OO.eOO. In most
cities having retirement funds the teach
ers contribute a percentage Of their sal
aries and the city or board OF education
an equal amount Eleven cities give
the revenues from tuition Of nonresident
pupils; Charleston. 5. c.. 4 per cent of
the school tax; Minneapolis and St Paul.
1 per cent on every 500 OF taxable prop
erty; Boston. ~ per cent on every 500;
New York. per cent OF excise moneys;
Cincinnati $4,000. and Philadelphia.
$4,000
Pension laws have now been passed in
twenty-one States. Indiana, Wisconsin,
Utah, Nebraska. and Virginia having
passed them in the last year. which
shows that legislators are fast realizing
the practical benefit as well as the jus
tice OF such laws.
The time of voluntary retirement varies
somewhat. it being allowed in most cases
after thirty years OF service. although
some laws require only twenty-five The
amount OF pension also varies. SEQ being
the lowest and S2,O0O the highest. the
average amount being one-half the
salary.
Although there can hardly be two
opinions as TO the claim which the teach
ers have upon any system adopted. the
retirement OF those who have been long
In the service should not be so much
regarded as a benefit TO them as TO the
schools. The teacher who is worn out
by constant mental and physical strain
in the class room is positive detriment
10 the school; but where Is the board Of
education that is willing 10 discharge
her when her efficiency is over? The
retirement fund makes this duty un-
necessary. and relieves the teacher from
the long strain by giving her the means
Of livelihood
There is as vet no such provision for
the teachers in the District OF Columbia.
but they want IL, and earnestly hope
that Congress, acting in the place OF
municipal councils, viii legislate for them
and give what has already been pro-
vided in so many States