Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1910-05-29

But if YOU never have hau 10 i1St14i
to anybody read his own play 1--WE II
maze II "his' for convenience tieh
abide with the undersigned for a heetihe
1--WE minutes.
First Of all, however, proit pS this
word OF advice: Don t.
Don't let anybody make YOU lend MN
your ears while ne mouths his play at
you: youH DC sorry if you do
The herewith writer would just about
az soon make big ones INTO httie ones
a t,anoo little synonym for that ROCK
pile thing as TO listen 10 fehow IN
,oii!ng his personally conducted pay
uuon him. There isn't any sadufE "cth'
am work r-ore dismal, gloomy. dcpress-
irs 20 the spirit; than listening 10 a
cnap reading Ills play 81 you. 1t doeSii .
make any difference who the chap IS
,itter Sot u particle OF difference:
This now-Hriting typ%ritlst mas near"
David Belasco read a play 10 an assem-,
bIed company OF players; he has ieanco
YEARLY upou one leg ard then upon an
other while Geney Water I'VE an tail
him 'ieney, of course sponteu one VI
lis pla~s at a defenseless and maltouSiy
laundering bunch of thesp.uns: he has
card all kinds and sorts Of piaywrights'
those who have connected ana those VIZ
haven't chance in billion ever To
connect unreeve their plays III all sotis
OF circumstances.
Eat II rraEos no diffcre"re Who tie
ylayvrite!s arc. Its just as dlSpirttln&
and dousing TO the soul 10 listen 10 the
s1re-onough uiay-puddlers do II as 1t Is
10 listen u the maybe-goinS-to-ec play
wfights.
or course when one of the hcnest-and
truly playwriShts insists that you Stlc u
around while he goes through Win the
of -
pIay on your ears, YOU have the more OF
less asSuageful consciousness that you re
participating In 4 sort OF real eApei l.
Snce; that the fellow who is uoins the
spiuttering Is. after ali, person or con-
sequence in his field. But that conscious
ness isn't SO mitigating. at that. The
undersigned firmly believes that 1t would
ne q bore To listen To David Garrick iead
n play aloud; yes, that it would hc Il
Kind OF a magenta-colored botheration &c
nave 10 listen to ". Shakespeare uncoii-
ing one of mis- plays.
But this little tale is going to be about
q playwriter who ism l. and who never
will be. The fact that he is not, and
never will be doesn't bother the out-of-
the-question draymatist at all, however
he knows that he has Pinero and
Bernstein looking like couple of scene
suffers when il comes 70 tEat dramatic
construction stuff, and ne il 50 delirious-
~ happy in that benign consciousness!
There was no chance on the globe foI
the present tIlECDsGitE 10 & u out Oh us
,enjng 10 this may Be -drauatists reading
Of mis- most recent play. lie was lureC
10 the house OF the playwriter by rusc
and then tic disaster was pushed atoI
of him without warning. OBy the way
the difference between ''playwrter'' anC
and a playwright Is this: The play.
wright has had at least one play pro
duced.)
II was felonious trick. but there va.
no way out of ii. The playwritec's foos
had been partaken Of mnder protest, 1,
be sure. but that made no dinerence)
therefore the piaywriter was in Il pc
sition to hop up from the table. ever
before the coffee was quite finished. anC
uroduce his hideous bunch OF manu-
script, and say, airily:
oh by the way. old man, | wann,
get your opinion of some of the scenes il
This little society drama that I've jus
finished.
What was to be done? Not a thing.
vo,lld have been rude To hit him o., tn
ton Of the head with one of his owl
n,aces of china and then have bolted 70
II Il, would have been the rough stuf
! even TO have beat it without hitting him
Z, 4 nd s0,lhere NE were. booked and seized
,,Iad 10 go through with it,
II iliilk you'll &c able promptly TO sc