davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24

"a pound of BUTTER" agreed the
gentleman.
"Bread?"
"Three loaves."
Coffee 2"
The gentleman hesitated. "No."
he said, with decision. "Coffee
enough on hand to last the rest cf
the week" He smiled contentedly,
watched the clerk write a name and
address at the top of the order, and
then went out of the shop whistling.
"IIow did you know what he want
ed?" asked the other customer of
the clerk
He lives just around the corner
in an apartment, and he and his wife
get their own breakfasts. Always
the same things-never any change
but he always has to have it writ
ten down."
''Do you know who he is?"
"His name is Bertini, l think.
He's kind of professor. I believe
he has kind of memory system he
teaches to people who can't remem-
Der things"
The other customer smiled, but
the clerk was quite serious. He had
no sense of humor.-YoHth'S Com
farioH.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
AN EXERCISE IN MNEMONICS.

"WHAT did I do with that memo
randumf" said a distinguished look
ing man, speaking half to himself
but with his eyes on the clerk, who
stood waiting for his order in a
large city grocery. "What I've
done with that memorandum this
time | really cannot imagine. But
you just wait a minute"
He began searching his pockets.
From each of them came scraps of
paper, big and little, old letters with
pencil notes on them, envelopes sim
ilarly decorated, two or three small
notebooks, theatre programme, and
a number of pieces evidently torn
from the margin of newspaper
covered with writing, He examined
the scraps one after another and re-
stored each bunch to its separate
pocket. The clerk waited, and Gus
toner farther along the counter eyed
the display with curiosity.
"Gone," said the gentleman, with
an air of fnality. "I'll have to trust
to memory" The clerk nodded.
six eggs?" he said, with an in
terrogative infection.
Right" said the gentleman.
The clerk wrote it down. "a
pound of butter?" he continued.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
THE REST WAS SILENCE.

"WHY do they say AS smart as a
steel trapl'" asked the talkative
boarder. 81 never could see any
thing particularly intellectual about
a steel trap"
"A steel trap is called smart" ex-
planned the elderly person, in his
sweetest voice, because it knows
exactly the right time TO shut up"
More might have been said, but,
in the circumstances, it would have
seemed unfitting.-PHHeh.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
SUFFERING OF THE POOR.

SEEING a tramp hurrying away
from a large house, fellow pro
fessional asked him what luck he had
met with. at amt wort askin'
there" was the reply. II just 'ad
peep through the winder. It's a
poverty-stricken 'ouse, mate. There
was aschully two lads playin' on one
pianer "-PhiiadeIPhid Inquirer.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
4 GOOD REASON.

SHE-How is it you we're not at
the Westends' receptions
HE-I stayed away on account of
a personal matter.
SHE-May / ask what it was1
HE-Will you promise to keep it
secretl
SHE-Yes.
HE-Well, they failed to send me
an invitation.-JHdy.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
WONDERFUL.

PHYSICAL culture, father, is per-
fectly lovely. To develop the arms
/ grasp this rod by one end and
move it slowly from right to left"
"Well, WELL" exclaimed her father,
what won't science discover? If that
rod had straw at the other end you'd
be sweeping. g."-IliHStvdted Bits.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
CYNICAL.

"WHY does that dog of yours al
ways howl when he sees mei"
Because, my dear fellow, he's
rude enough to express what other
people feel. el."-Bdltimore AmericdH
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
REAL FOOD 1T LAST.

VAN ANTLER-I think we are sure
of a good dinner tonight. You know
my new butler does the entire cater
ing for the household.
GRuBB-Can you rely on him to-
VAN ANTLER-Not always, but this
evening | requested him to send us
up something from the kitchen table.
-AHS5VYS.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
MERELY HATPINS.

ETHEL calling on her friend)-I
didn't know you were one of those
athletic girls.
MADGE--What do you mean7
ETHEL-Look at those foils over
your bureau.
MADGE-Foilsl Why, those are
my hat pins.-BoStoH Transcript.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
TERRIBLE.

"MY wife stabbed a passerby with
one of these terrible hat pins, and it
cost me five francs damages.
That's nothing, old chap, my wife
paused before a hat shop the other
day; a hat struck her and bang went
twenty francs" Bon NiVdnt.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
ALWAYS THUS.

FRIEND - Did your late husband
have any relatives9
RICH WIDow-Only at Christmas
and at his death.-JHdge.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
ONE GOOD THING.

"ANY good things in the bur
lesque show at the Umpiref"
yep. The hacker must be one"
-CIeveldHd Leader.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
n PLEASANT COMPLIMENT.

TEAcHER-Now, children, sup
pose you all know that Willie Win
kle's papa is going to address the
school this afternoon?
JIMMY JENKINs-Yes'm. l told
my pa about it, too,
TEAcHER-Indeed; and what did
he say?
JIMMY JENKINs-He said, "Why,
that old blatherskite can't address
an envelope. e."-Chicago Meas.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
BITTER COLD.

A SOUTH side man claims
that the janitor of the fiat
building in which he lives
is the meanest ianitor on
earth.
''He never gives us half
enough steam during the
day." said the complainant,
''and at night the condi-
tions are simply awful. WI
quently wake up and hear i
teeth chattering on the bt
Chicago Record-Herald.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
REPROACH.

'If you had had the tiniest bit
of love for me you would never
have married me!-witzige Blaet-
ter, Munich.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24

GOING TO TAKE 4 CHANGE.
"ARE You really going to marry
that young man Z"
'Yes, his parents strike me as very
agreeable people" - Detroit Free
Press.
Los Angeles herald., 1910-04-24
ONE CLEAN OF Joy.

JOHNNY had two presents at the
same time-one a diary, which he
kept very carefully, and the other
pea-shooting popgun, which he fired
indiscriminately on all occasions.
One day his mother found the fol-
lowing terse record in his diary:
"Mondy cold and sloppy. Toosdy
cold and sloppy. Wensdy cold and
sloppy shot granma."-EschdHge.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14

On his way home he visited Washing
ton, went through all the depart
mcnts, went to the top Of the
Washington monument, visited the
great national cemetery and register
ed in the old home of General Robert
e. Lee. Mr.. Shaft said it was the
finest and most interesting trip he
ever made and was delighted with
Washington. He says that when one
gets to the top of the 500 foot mOnu-
ment he can see over a big patch of
country and could see Baltimore and
almost up to Harper's Ferry. But his
most interesting and amusing event
was when he was selling Lincoln
county corr and telling the tender
feet Of the glories and wonders of the
west.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14

tions and the business Of the state. |
soon learned that the people of South
Dakota made no mistake when they
made him their governor. He was a
duct convinced me that he was a high
minded and conscientious man, and
that he constantly kept before him in
all of his official acts, What Is For
The Best Interest OF The People OF
South Dakota!
Having, during the legislative SEES
sion, become deeply impressed with
Governor Wesley as a mar and with
his work as governor, 1 have since
that time paid close attention to the
Administered ion Of the affairs of the
state by him, and I find that he has
always stood out in the open and
made a clear cut fight for what lie
thought was for the best interest OF
the people Of the state, and he has
continually interested himself in gett-
ing acquainted with the needs of the
people and the resources of the state.
lie has used every opportunity to
boost for South Dakota and its people.
He has repeatedly travelled from one
end Of the state to the other to attend
state and county fairs, educational
conventions, farmers congresses in
stitutes and congresses that had for
their purpose /the development of
South Dakota and the betterment of
her people.
Governor Wesley has given the state
a clean, b~usiness-like administration,
and as a result, the affairs of the state
and our state institutions were never
before in as good condition.
Governor Vessey has repeatedly
outside of the state to at
tend congresses, and he has always
been found boosting for the state over
whose people he presides as governor.
[ call attention to the fact that his
speech delivered at the Farmers Con-
gress in Chicago, something like a
year ago. WAS referred to by Chicago
papers at the time, as the best speech
delivered at that congress on the sub
ject before the meeting. This speech
partoOk of the nature Of a general
boost for South Dakota, her people
and her resources, and attracted to
South Dakota, the attention Of all
those who heard the speech and others
who read the report Of the meeting.
Well may it be said that the people
u a state are judged by those who
i've beyond its borders, by the quality
the man who presides over 1t as its
governor. Judged by this standard
hose who dwell in other lands can
rave no hesltancy in coming within
,he borders OF South Dakota to make
heir homes. South Dakota has been
better and richer state by reason OF
he fact that Governor Wesley was
its governor.
And now l want to say In conclu-
ion, that my purpose In asking for
he valuable space in your paper, Is to
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14
Vessty Should Be Reelected.
Black Hills Man Who Voted Against
Him Two Years Ago Now
For Him.

One of the interesting and imporu-
ant Developments Of the present cam
paign in the state Is a letter written
by DIR. Herman f. Rate, who was
elected a member of the 1909 legislat-
ure from Custer county on the demo-
cratic ticket. DR.. Rattle believes the
best interests of the state demand the
return of Governor Wesley as the head
Of the state government for another
term, and in his letter he gives his
reasons why the governor should be
reelected at the election in Novemb-
er. From a personal acquaintance
with the governor, and after observ-
ing his course during the legislative
session and since that time, DR.. Rate
does not hesitate to recommend the
reelection of Governor Vessey. DR..
Rate S letter is as follows:
Nisland, S. D.. Sept. q. 1910.
To the Sioux Falls Daily Press: l
trust that you will allow me some Of
your valuable space to make a few OBJ
servations on the political campaign
now under way In this state.
l have always taken an interest in
the political affairs of the locality
where I have lived, and in 1908 had
the honor OF being sent from Custer
county, where / then lived, to serve
as a member Of the 1909 session OF our
legislature. I was elected as a demo-
GRAFT and. until that time, had always
been a democrat.
The 1909 legislature was dominated
by the Republican party, and as /
took an active part In the measures
pending, / had occasion to consult
with Governor Vessey on many C
casions, In the interest of legislation
that was of Importance to the people
OF the state. I, from the first, was
much impressed with Governor Yes
sey's straightforward and honest
manner OF dealing with public ques-
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14

0. T. Rust and son of Lincoln town.
ship. we're LEADER visitors Saturday.
e.. M. GilbertSOn of Hudson was
among our renewal subscribers Mon
day.
Mr.. Rust brought in four ears Of
corn, one thirteen inches long, and all
ola superior quality. One cal had
kernels from half an inch to three
quarters of an inch long.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14
Capt. BOrardus Again Hits the
Bull's Eye.

Capt. BOrardus Again Hits the
Bulbs Eye.
This world famous rifle shot who
holds the championship record Of 100
pigeons in 100 consecutive shots is liv-
ing at Lincoln, III. Recently inter
viewed, he says:-"I suffered a long
time with kidney and bladder trouble
and used several we'll known kidney
medicines, all Of which gave me no
relief until I started taking Foley's
Kidney Pills. Before 1 used Foley's
Kidney Pills l had severe hackaches
and pains In my kidneys with sup
preston and a cloudy voiding. On
arising IN the morning would get
dull headaches. Now 1 have taken
three BOTTLES of Foley Kidney Pills
and feel 100 per cent better. ! am
never bothered with my kidneys or
bladder and again feel like my own
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14
. Generous and Charitable Wish

II wish all might know Of the bene-
fit | received from your Foley's Kid
ney Remedy" says I. N. Regain,
Farmer, Mo. His kidneys and blad
der gave him 80 much pain, misery
and annoyance, he could not work nor
sleep. He says Foley's Kidney Remedy
completely cured him.
SHERMAN & ROCHE.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14

For Sale Duroc Jersey stock hogs,
March and April farrow, weighing
from IT'S to 200 pounds. Parties wish
ing anything in this line will do we'll
to call on or write
j. j. CASTLE,
l7-22 Inwood, Iowa.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-10-14

let others know who have not had The
opportunity that l have had, to know
Governor Eesscy we'll and TO earn
what's good work lie is doing for the
state, that lie is the only candidate
who Is running for Office Of governor
OF our state, who is entitled to con-
sheraton at the hands of the voters
next November. Governor Vessey is
a good business man, and the expert
nee he has gained in serving the
state as It's governor during one term
will enable him to make even a better
governor during his second term.
Although, two years ago l support
ed n democratic candidate for gov
ernor, and although | have live d at
Rapid City and am we'll acquainted
with the democratic candidate who is
now seeking the votes OF the people. l
nevertheless shall support Governor
Vessey for reelection, and urge all
voters who want a good, honest.
straight man for governor, to assist in
re-electing Governor Vessey next No
Vember by an overwhelming majority.
DR.. Herman f. Rattle.
Rev. A. T.. Buriff Of the M. e.
church, is at Mitchell this week at
tending the annual conference, and
ne Will have the pleasure of reporting
his church free of debt. He has been
very successful in his church work
q the congregation is unanimous in
asking his return to the Canton
charge.
Rev. Cave, formerly pastor of the
~. y. church OF this city, has, we
learn, Withdrawn from the Methodist
church in Iowa, and is now a member
u n Congregational church with a
pastorate at New Hampton. Nav he
be successful in his new work.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
ALL MY PlMPLES GONE
Girl Tells Flow a Elotchy' Skin Was
Ciearsed Ey Simple Wash.

Il was ashamed Of my. face writes
Miss Minnie Pic aid of Altamahaw,
n. G. at was al! full Of pimples and
sears but after using d. d. d. Pre-
scription ! can say that now there is
no sign Of that Eczema, and that was
three Yeas rec"
d. D. y las become so famous as
a cure aCd instant relief in Eczema
and all other Sc ious sin diseases,
that its value is sometimes overlooked
in clearing up rash, pimples, black
heads. and all other minor forms of
skin impurities.
The fact is, that while D D. D. is
so penetrating that it strikes TO the
very root of Eczema or any other seri-
Gus trouble, the soothing Oil of Winter.
green. Thymol and other Ingredients
are so carefully compounded there is
no wash for the skin made that can
compare with this great household
remedy for every Kind Of skin trouble
d. d. d. Is pleasant to use. perfectly
harmless to til most delicate skin,
and absolutely reliable. A 25-cent
bottle will give you positive proof Of
the wonderful effectiveness OF this
great remedy.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
GOVERNMENT.
The proper function Of a govern
ment is to make it easy for people
TO do good and difficult for them to
do evil.-Gladstone.
COMFORTING WORDS
MANY an Aberdeen Household Will
Find Them So


To have the pains and aches OF
bad back removed; to be entirely
free from annoying, dangerous uri-
nary disorders is enough to make any
kidney sufferer grateful. To tell how
this great change can be brought
about will prove comforting words
to hundreds of Aberdeen readers.
Mrs. Elizabeth Laecock, 434 Kari
avenue, Hoquiam, WASH, says: Il
shall always recommend Doan's Kid
ney Pills in return for the benefit
they brought me. Since publicly
recommending them in 1908, have
used them off and on and have al
ways been benefited. Kidney COM
plant chung to me for many years,
the first symptom being severe at
lacks of backache. I had such ter
rible spells of dizziness that l was
afraid to walk across the floor and
trouble with the kidney secretion
also existed. I rested poorly and al
though I took treatment from the
doctors, I found only temporary re-
lief. Finally l read about Doan's
Kidney Pills and began their use
found them to be remedy of great
merit and l had not taken them long
before I received relief" 81
For sale by all dealers. Price 50
cents. FOster-Milburn Co., Buffalo.
New York, sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name-Doan's-
and take no other. CD
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
"CoME OUT, ALL. "
When Mother Announces Thinks
giving Dinner Is Ready.

In the parlor all except mother. who
is bustling at the fount of those Araby
odors. are gathered in studiously in
different circle. OF course to such the
eating part is nothing. They can wait.
enjoying conversation. The reminis-
cences of the evening before around
the lamp and hearth are resumed. fas-
chatting then. but now-huh.
DO you remember. LouT asks IA
ther Uncle Lou does Ha. ha! Ho,
no! Nevertheless
Will dinner never be ready?
Aunt and uncle and grandparent
draw you t. them t. fondle and ban
ter and query. But how may one
know how old one is, or where was
Moses when the light went out. OF
why a Zen crosses the road, when one
has resolved into stomach and nose
and all ones thoughts are in that adj
joining room?
Will dinner never be ready?
Grandmother is telling you in her
gentle voice of when she WAS Il little
girl and not so old as you and they
had Thanksgiving, interesting should
such a recital be. But
Oh, Gear. Won't dinner ever be
ready?
Where are you going, johnny" de
mands father stcrnly.
You want Il drink of water-iust Il
drink of water-in the other room.
NO; you stay right in here with us
You'll bother mother"
W-well. But
Won't dinner ever All. Mother
stands upon the threshold. Flushed.
warm and triumphant, she bids, Come
out. all"
Since then you have heard by the
Dutch ovens of the roundup fire the
cooks long yelp of "Chucl1w or on
shipboard you have sprung to the gal
ley boys reckoning wake. You have
dropped most willingly into place at
the logging camp long table or. tired
and spent by a day of strenuous bust
ness, in the clubs cafe you have
sighed with relief rs the silent waiter
bore in the soup and bread sticks. But
mothers smiling "Come out, ALL" can
never be o'ershadowed.-Ed l.. Sa-
bin in Lippincott's.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
tiesltnfu! Honey.

Honey. one Of tht most nutritious
and delicate OF foods, should be cate;
more than it is" writes Il cooking eS
pert. Bought in the comb. it is bound
to be unadulteratcd and will keep on,
free from sore throat and brorchil
troubles. know Il number of women
who use honey as cosmetic. They
apply it to the SKIN. rub it in we'll
then wash it OF with hot water. The
result is Il finer teytured complexion. a
glowing color, a young, fresh look"
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
Teet.1 G, :. >..;ark.

In respect 10 lis ilHti.ion the shark
Is a very remarEHnir creature. The
white shark has seven rows OF teeth
while other species vary in tlr nu,l-
Der of rows they possess. ii aust be
understood. however. that the SHARK
only uses one ROY 1T Il, ti!up. The
o1her rows lie down inside the mouth
behind the edge Of the jaw. erecting
themselves whom il is time for them to
take successfully tlr place of The tirS,
row. When one observes how keen
edged these inciS0rs are it seems no
wonder that they can bite off big
rope as readily us if it We're thread.
Match Sticks.
Certain kinds of matches are shaved
with the grain from sawed blocks.
sAssssza.rs :2re at 10th ways by saws. In
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
Salad Wrinkles.

sweet orange salad makes an or
namental dish. 1t is made by cutting
the fruit in round. thin slices and using
tlm and sugar for the dressing.
a banana salad-cutting fruit in
lengthwise slices and put ON lettuce
leaves-would be dressed with sugar
ana lennon juice.
a wrinkle for irving lettuce a more
piQuant taste is 10 Use a few drops of
Worcestershire sauce with French
dressing.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24

| huSU,..1 o.. - - CIli!l:s u Ineif nFst
day ut Lonesomchurst. Mrs. Gabbitt
that's the lady next door, called
upon me today. and she tells me all
the people here are like one big fam.
ilv."
"Ah. yes" replied her huSband-"aL
ways knocking each other" -Catholic
Standard and Times.
An Appreciation.
An old sea captain was turning over
the leaves of IL friends album whe,.
coming to the photograph of Young
lady Of whose acquaintance the family
was rather proud. he WAS asked what
he thought of her. ".AWeel" was the
old sea rover's reply. If ! were goin'
to make Il rare stroke o business Id
buy that girl for what she was worth
an sell her for what she thinks she IA
WORTH Ideas.
Cures For S'eep'eesness. :.
Horace in his satircs recommended
swimming the Tibrr three times Sir
Thomas Browne was accustomed to
Franklin took an air bath. Sir John
Sinclair counted. while Sir John Eep.
ME when engaged on any public works
never went to sleep until his head had
bean comb2l anl gently rubbed by
soft baud
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
Not That Kind.

"Now, jim. want you to go to Mrs
Gadsby's bridge party this evening
and play with her rs long as She wants
you to-"
But detest Mrs Gadsby and her
chatter. BESIDES. she cheats"
mo matter You stay"
"That's hard. Isn't it to be a case
of can't-l-leave-her bridge ?"-Baltimore
American.
So Like q Family.
Dear" said Mrs. Newcome to her
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24

Ham and cheese canapes are appe-
tiZing tidbits. Spread finger lengths of
bread with butter and Il layer of dev-
lied ham. over the whole sprinkle
layer Of Parmesan cheese. Put the
canapes in IN oven to become ho. b.
fore serving
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24
The Useful Crouton,

The simples, way to prepare Il
crouton is to cut slices of white bread
three-Quarters Of an inch thick. But
ter lightly on both sides: then cut
into three-quarter inch squares and
brown in skillet over moderate
fire Turn often. AS soon as lightly
Drowned put Oh drowned paper on a
colander to drain and keep hot. Serve
quickly.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1910-11-24

Mix in Il basin three cupfuls of mo
lasses. one cupful Of butter. two cup
fuls Of boiling water, one teaspoonfu
of baking soda dissolved in litt,
milk, two teaspoonfuls of ground gin
ger. one teaspoonful of allspice five
cupfuls of sifted -four and three ounces
of sultana raisins. Mix well and poui
into a buttered and Toured cake tin
Bake till ready in moderate oven.