Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1910-03-11

( VELVET 2u RAGS )
INDIVIDUAL oPIkIok) }
{ BY LUE +. VERNON J


iO' ilISuitu Love. ne Dllnntef
had to pay.
War has its victims in time of
strife, but the automobile has its
victims every day.
A "squibble" is a sort of cross be-
tween a squabble and quarrel, with
a little bit of friendship mixed.
Honesty is the best policy and. one
that never expires, neither does it
require a cash-in-advance premium.
An Olympia physician says, the
patients he finds the most difficult to
cure are those who have nothing the
matter of them.
Wonder if Hazel Moore will take
Hamilton a dish of strawberries and
cream this summer, or will she be
too busy automobiling?
A man in San Antonio, Texas, died
OF cleverncss. All his relations and
friends told him he was clever and
could write; so he starved to death.
The most considerate wife / ever
heard of lives in Olympia. She dates
all her letters week or so ahead, to
allow her husband time to post them.
If it were not for reading the epi-
taphs on the tom bStones, no one
would ever dream that so much vir-
tue had ever flOurished in this world.
If you would learn what "a cold,
unfeeling worlG' this really is. just
listen to the ribald laughter you'll
hear when you step on a banana skin.
Biplanes, monoplanes and aero
planes may be ordered for 10:30 p. NJ"
will soon appear upon theater pro
grammes, no doubt, if we are to be-
lieve the sky-pilots of the dir.
a Mexican girl in the city of Mex
leo slew her lover for calling her
mother a coyote. A few more wo-
men of this kind and the mother-in-
law joke will be as extinct as the
dOdo.
An Olympia man said to me the
other afternoon: 81 like Lent be
cause | can save money in Lent, and
when Easter comes ] can have a good
blowout. u" That is simply form of
ceremonial seltishness.
Mrs. Klam: Before we were
married you said that life would be
'one grand sweet song"
Mr.. Klam: Well, that of it ~
Mrs. Klam: "I'd like to know
where you do your singing.
1t stood discarded, in darkness. gloom,
Where sunshine did not peep.
| Deserted, unwept, cast aside, unsnng,
As Of it canght peep;
MY. how Memories crooned and sighed
AS near it | approached.
And tipped my hat, paid homage,
To the dear. old-time, stage-coach.
A new anaesthetic has oeen dis,
covered under the influence of which
the patient retains complete con-
sciousncss, yet suffers no pain.
Husbands might try this when pre-
scnted with the millinery bills by
their wives.
Said a Chauffeur to me the other day
with a note of pride in his voice, Il
have been driving for several years,
and | have never killed anyone. "
/ Marvellous However, there is No
need for despair. Whilst there is
life there is hope.
California and Arizona may boast
of their 1866 days of uninterrupted
sunshine"-but give to me Puget
Sound, with its musical winter rains.
and her grand, alluring friendly fiji
trees. These are as near heaven as
| ever wish to be.
Startish: Il notice the editor OF
the P-I has entirely abandoned the
simple style of spelling which at one
time he so warmly advocated
Klam: Yes, he found it so diff
ticult to make people understand
that he knew better"
An Olympia woman says her sor
subscribes for the STANDARD to OBJ
tain the local news. but gets mucf
more gratis. Nothing stingy OF
close about the best weekly paper
in the United States-it always give:
more than it receives.
1t is well to keep before US alway:
this JeffersOnian rule. Freedom o
religion; freedom of the press; free
dom of the person under the pro
lection of habeas corpus: and trials by
jury impartially selected" Get tina
by heart; it will be serviceable il
every political controversy.
" East is East, and West is West,
but it seems as if in the matter of thu
utilization of modern inventions tn,
twain are rapidly meeting. for Jeru
salem has an electric light and powel
plant, while the construction OF al
electric railway between that cit.
and Jaffa is now in progress.
Railway stations in Sweden a
which meals are served are indicated
by the simple but suggestive pictur
of a crossed knife and fork opposite