The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1910-08-31
You may have noticed how perturbed
was for a few day y,

lou may nave noticed how perturbed
/ was for a few days?"
mo. l didn't" she replied. IF you
lost SO on Wall street you concealed it
from me wonderfully WELL"
But l was no yet at the end Of my.
resources, Mrs. p. A determined man
V is. I went to our family doctor
and stated the case as strongly as l
could. l even told him that you had
gone into a decline and might not last
six months"
what did you want to tell him any
such nonsense forT'
II though he might advance us sew
eral hundred dollars in a lump sum
and let me pay him back on the in.
stallment plan-a quarter a week. I
was disappointed, however. He said
that the sooner you died the sooner
you would be among the angels"
"Mr. Perkins, 1 don't believe you are
telling me the truth"
Gently, d~car-gently. When 1 spoke
about the seashore he used these
words to me. They are craven on my
memory and can never be ungraven:
My dear man. are you crazy? Do you
want to get rid Of your wife before
her time? Is there no human heart in
your human breast? Take Mrs. P. to
the seashore and you take her to her
doOmv
"Those are his words, Mrs. Perkins,
and when l asked for an explanation
ne said: Don't you know, Mr.. Perkins,
that Mrs. P. is fresh-too fresh, and
that the seashore is salt-very salt.
And can you not conceive Of the re-
suits when a too fresh body is brought
suddenly into contact with a too salt
one? You are a murderer at heart to
entertain the thought of taking your
wife to the seashorerr"
Next time l see the doctor I'm 60
ing to ask him if he said any such
thing!"' snapped Mrs. Perkins.
Deaths at Summer Resorts.
II believed in him, of course" re-
sumed the ''wriggler." But l thought
it wouldn't do any hurt to have a little
talk with Phillips, who was at the sea-
shore last summer. I'm glad l did.
He kindly permitted me to copy some
statistics he had made, and here they
are. Listen:
Number of persons who dropped
dead in the water while bathing. 54o.
"'Number who suddenly collapsed
on the sands. 456.
"'Number found dead in their beds
from o much bzone, 800.
Number who died in their hus-
bands arms. 946.
"'Number who barely reached to
perish amidst familiar surroundings,
65S.
"'Number Of bereaved husbands in
one week, S76.
Number Of u%ndertakers who
amassed wealth in one season, 327.'
Their are the statistics. Mrs. Per |
kins. and when l say that after look !
ing them over l made up my mind
that we would go to the Catskills in
stead of the seashore l trust that you
will lay your hand in mine and ac-
knowledge that your interests are al |
ways and ever paramount with me-"
What? Are we to go to the Cats
kills?' she joyfully exclaimed.
1--WE are, my love-we are
You dear old darling. I'm sure I'd
rather go there"
81 thought you would. We run no
risk going to the mountains"
"Oh. it will be so nice! Can we start
Monday?"
"Well, hardly, my love-"
"Then when?'
"AbOut the middle of January"
Mrs. Perkins rose up and gave him |
one awful look and then stalked into
the house, and Mr.. Perkins looked aft
er her and then said to himself:
"Just like the rest Of them! When
they get what they want then they
want something different"