davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

! understand why men will do many
things
That afterward bring them the devil-to
pay:
I've fathomed the reason why one fellow
sings
dismay,
And one will talk hours when he's
nothing to say
While others think silence as good as
chat
But this problems making me wrinkled
and gray:
Now. why does a man want to wear a
silk hat?
He's vain of It, too. as an angel Of WINGS
And wants to keep wearing 1t both night
and day;
Though 1t may grow battered and fuzzy,
he clings
To Its ancient wreck as he trudges his
way;
He'd wear 1t while swimming or while
making hay
Or while playing ball when he stepped
up to bat
II some one would only say it was
O. K
Now. why does man want to wear a
silk hat?
filings,
Prize fighter, chiropodist, sightseeing
jay
Each thinks his silk hat Is the last touch
that brings
The comforting thought that his garb is
au fait
No odds IL his nature is gloomy or gay,
Nor whether he's slender or pompous
and fat,
The shiny connection on his head must
stay
Now, why does a man want to wear q
silk hat?
Prince. think not it's fashion at which ]
inveigh-
It's nothing to do with the case, as to
that.
Just answer my question and tell me, ]
pray,
Now. why does a man want to wear q
silk hat?
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
The Vanderbilt Home.

Teller as representatives to battle at
the last ditch or make the surrender
complete.
Take that stroll down Fifth avenue
from Fifty-ninth street, for the fun OF
1t. Then 1t was one fine long row of
mansions-granite and marble and
brownstone-every one a palace and
every one inhabited by an aristocracy
as great as America can ever furnish
But now, walking down the street
from the park entrance, you meet few.
er mansions than shops even for tbs
first three blocks. A count shows five
brokers, three real estate offices, two
corset concerns and a French modiste
between the Plaza and the residence
of Mrs. Cornelius Vanderbilt to the
south. And in Fifty-seventh street,
not far from the Vanderbilt mansion
and just west of the Harry Payne
Whitney, residence, the famous old Oil.
yer Hartman mansion is to be made
over into store for dressmaker. The
fact that this new neighbor Is said tc
have been Virginia beauty before she
entered the trade, however, may ap
peal to the social taste of the Whit.
neys and Vanderbilts.
Just below, the famous old Andrew
Zabriskie house has gone into this
hands OF Schumann's sons, who are
making it over into fine business quar-
tiers, with apartments above And
right there, also, is the Coils p Hunt
ington mansion. with a new gilded art
shop across the way.
This little jaunt down Fifth avenue
shows, in addition, an amazing display
of glittering signs, with stately back.
grounds of brownstone and marble, ad.
vertising trade where New York's real
society used to hold levee. Signs are
everywhere. One Of them even adver.
tises coal from the basement of an old
mansion that wreckers are destroying
overhead.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

Great Britain has just launched one
OF the biggest of the dreadnought bat
tleships which the government is
steadily adding to the navy. And that
American ideas are good for some
thing in this connection is shown by
the information which has leaked out,
notwithstanding the careful way in
which naval secrets are guarded. that
the guns on the new vessel will be
arranged much like those on United
States battleships Of the latest design.
so that they can be fred one above an
other and concentrate tremendous
striking power at given point. Build
ers Of our warships are giving valua-
bic points to all the world.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

It will be a good day in this city
when every boy who goes to the high
school can multiply and divide with
snfailing accuracy, when he knows
the rule of three and Ia up on frac-
tions, says Philadelphia Inquirer. If
in addition to that he can write legi.
bly,, read distinctly and spell correctly
he will have better equipment than
has been common Of late. In trying
to teach children too much we have
not trained them to definite ways OF
thinking. Yet to think clearly about
anything is the great prerequisite OF
life and ought to be the chief aim of
education.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Currant Sherbet,

Boil together two cupfuls of water
and two cupfuls of sugar for ten min
utes; skim. cool and add three cupfuls
Of currant Juice and one heaping tea
spoonful of powdered gelatine dis
solved in one gill of boiling water.
Turn into a freezer and when half
frozen add the stiffly beaten whites of
three eggs, with three tablespoonfuls'
Of powdered sugar. Continue freezing
until very firm. remove the dasher,
pack and set aside for two hours be-
fore using.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
The LambertviIIe Record
PUBLISHED TWICE-A-WEEK
AT
Larapbertvidle, NJ. j.
DO INCHES MAKE THE MAN7

Until the time of the war between
Russia and Japan the short man was
obliged to defend the, prowess of his
Kind by citing Napoleon as an exam.
PIE OF what short persons could do.
Balzac, the great French novelist.
whose height was trifie more than
five feet, often half whimsically, often
seriously, endeavored to show a con.
nection between short stature and ex-
cellence. 1t was also a source of con
ISOLATION to him and to other men who
history that the Roman conquerers
were short. But after the Russo-Japa.
nese war it became evident to all that
stature had nothing to do with the
case, unless. perhaps, the victory of
the little Jap proved that the short
man was the superior of the tall. But
now come the municipal authorities
In our cities, who say that a tall po-
Ilfceman is better than a short and
that tall fireman is the superior of
short fireman, says Boston Globe.
Five feet 7k inches Is the limit of
ishortness to be tolerated say some.
while others lower the standard a
quarter of an inch. Others would low:
er 1t half an inch more. Supersti-
items die hard. We are still children,
snd. although far from the age of
giants we cling to the notion that
inches make the man.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Pears With Chestnuts.

Peel, core and stew half a dozen
pears until tender, press through a
sieve and sweeten with powdered
sugar to taste. Season with the
grated rind Of lemon, the juice of
half lemon and pinch of mace
Add a cupful of boiled and chopped
chestnuts The large Italian chest
nuts are the best for this purpose.
Stir In the chestnuts, heap into a
glass bowl and serve with whipped
cream.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
GIVEN UP TO TRADE
Only the Gid Guard Holds Forth
on Fifth Avenue, N. Y.
Fashionable Thoroushfare Has Beer
Almost Completely Sold Out to In.
vading Mercenaries-Only Few
Prominent Families Remain.

New York-Imperious old Fifth
avenue has gone-not into clay, but
into trade. At Fifty-second street the
Vanderbilts, the Sloanes and the Shep-
ards, buttressed behind their massive
mansions, have been making the last
stand Of the old guard against the in
vasion of mercenaries. But now, I'M
like the old guard, they have surren
dered, and within a year Mrs. Cor
nelius Vanderbilt will have for third
door neighbor a French modisaae with
fine, big electric signs to enliten the
famous mansion at Fifty-seventh
street. where for years and years the
destinies of social America have been
sWayed.
most New Workers when Fifth avenue
from Ffftieth to Fifty-ninth street was
SO exclusive that only the Knicker.
bockers could live there, whatever
their wealth. Then policemen frowned
creaseless trousers off the street. Now
folks Of all classes mingle freely, and
there is only one block in all the ten
where trade has not intruded. In this
block within six months an apartment
house with promised height of some
hundreds of feet will crown the neigh.
borhood.
The whole story of It all is that the
"old Fifth avenue" has sold out. 1t has
received more mone.a consideration
from trade for moving up town into
the new Fifth avenue than the senti
mental satisfaction Of preserving Its
ancestral homes was worth. 1t has
emigrated northward-or to Europe,
therefore, leaving only the three Van
derbilts. the Sloanes. the Shepards..
the Huntingtons and William Rookie
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Reprehcnsible.

Look here" exclaimed the portly
man, dashing into the private Office
of wholesale chemist Look here,
sir, I've notion to expose you as .
fraud and faker."
MY dear sir" answered the other
man, what In the world occasions
such remarks from your"
why, that last barrel of chemical
preservative you sent me to be used
in our Absolutely Pure line of can.
ned goods has spoiled on our hands.
l believe you have been adulterating
t."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Eloquent Signs.

TOO bad about Deffers, the deaf
and dumb man, who was to make sign
speeches for the central committee,
wasn't it,"
Il didn't hear what it was. What
was it,"
Just before the campaign opened
all the fingers on his right hand were
cut OF by circular saw, leaving only
the stumps."
We'll, they tell me that he went on
the tour of speech-making, as planned.
as soon as his hand recovered, and
that he developed into splendid
stump speaker"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

Reports of accidents to women wear
dng hobble skirts begin to come In
OF course such accidents are iaevita-
BILE. A woman who deliberately binds
her limbs before submitting herself to
the dangers Of the highway is doubly
handicapped. for even unhampered
physically, she likely would lack tbs
Intelligence to dodge a street car.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Time Saving.

Go to the ant" We say to the slug
gard.
Scornfully he gazes at us.
Whats wrong?~ we ask. Cant
you take good advice?"
HUH" he shifts, then rises lazily
and walks to his pantry. Opening the
door he shows us the remains Of an
apple pie and an open sugar bucket.
Go to the ant" he mutters
Whats the use? All have to do is
to leave things in this shape and all
the ants on eaSth will come I'd me-"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Pastry Information.

If women who make doughnuts and
crullers would use little less flour
than the receipt calls for and stand
the mixture on the ice before 1t is
rolled out to get thoroughly chilled
and stiff and then cut 1t and fry it
quickly before 1t has time to soften,
the cakes would be more delicate than
when stirred stiff enough with flour
to hold together when the paste is
warm.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

i A man in New York was sent to
prison for four years for stealing a
fve-cent looking glass. 1t served him
right. A man who makes so little of
his opportunities in the face of such
shining examples ought to be shut of
from the rest of society.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

A man has been found starving
himself because he feared the end OF
the world was at Land. There must
be such a thing as the rash bravery
Of cowardice.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

A bank in Spokane is issuing anti
septic money. Still. while sanitary
banknotes may fit in better than the
others with the progressive ideas of
the age, as far as the others are con.
cerned, with all their germs. we love
them still.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

Some genius has invented a ma.
chine for testing operate voices. 1t
will not help much unless 1t makes It
possible for the operator to go away
and leave 1t after he sets 1t going.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

did Washington swear?" asked
periodical. We don't know, but some
enlightenment could be furnished II
we knew whether Martha's dresses
were buttoned down the back.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Peppers with Soft Shell Grabs

Sweet green peppers cut in thin
slices. emitting the fiery white lining
and seeds, make an appetizing. ac-
compartment for fried soft shell
crabs. Dip the strips of pepper into
salt and eat like celery.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

A New York street car jurr ped the
track and ran into a saloon. An amaz-
Ing instance of the power of sugges-
don: the car driWsr was doubtless
very thirsty.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

A Sauce for Broiled Fish.

Beat half cupful of butter to a
cream; then stir in slowly a table
spoonful of lemon juice and the same
of minced parsley. Season with white
pepper and when smooth and creamy
set on ice until time for serving.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

Considered as an aerial racer the
carrier pigeon may ,,ot be quite up to
date, but its motor seldom II ever gets
out of order.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
loIooed for Life,

lQlooed for Life.
"And we will always stick together
signs the happy Eskimo bride.
"Forever!" rapturously exclaims the
happy Eskimo bridegroom. Forever
we shall live. side by side. in our own
iglue.''
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11
Solemn Decision.

I hold 1t truth with him who writes
The tariff rules both days and nights
That toys are toys and dolls are dolls.
And overalls are overalls.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

It's wise man who can guess two
times out of three which way the cat
Is going to Jump.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

A writer sagely remarks that there
Is no excuse for drowning. Unfor-
tunately. apologies are never offered.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

Reputation is what others know
about you: character is what you
know about yourself.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1910-10-11

.1l<A-.O 7ee,Gf
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
USEFUL MAN IN COMMUNITY
ably Claim to Be Jack Of
All Trades.

1t is necessary that the pioneer he
q man of infinite resource, who can do
for himself or his neighbors every
necessary task. Such man was Col.
Samuel Sloper, one of the early set
tiers of Blandford, Mass, whose as
tonishing versatility is recorded by
Mr.. S. G. Wood in "Taverns and Turn
pixies of Blandford''
Col Sloper, among other things,
kept something of a stable, and pas
tured horses and stock. For the mu-
nificent reward of three shillings, the
old veteran, in 1888, moved the family
of David Knox, by means of "Teame
and Boy" Now and then he turned
his hand to odd jobs. He carded and
laid out John Waldo Woods flax one
season for seven pounds ten shillings.
He seems to have made shoes and
garments for his family and for his
neighbors For Enos LOOMS young
son, who was bound out to him, he did
on this wise: Gaping your sons
shoes, 1-3" zone bottle-green coat
trimmed and made for Moses, seven
] shillings." He made several shirts
| and frock for the Martin Leonard
Company.
The number of things which this
veteran and "dabster" did make an
astonishing list. He was srrgeon-in-
ordinary to the parish of Blandford,
and this long before he had accumu-
lated an army experience. VeSerin-
airy, too, he was. His journals are
peppered over with charges for the
treatment of young horses. In the ac-
count of Eliphalet Thompson, in the
year 1872, along with a frying Pam"
and 81 Pr Steers" is the charge, ITO
Setting your boys rist twelve shil-
lings." James Sinnett, in 1855, be-
came indebted to Setting your knee
and Dressing" and to "Sundn Dress
ings," four and three shillings respec-
| tiyely-Youth Companion.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
I
Sd and Brayton

VIM. Bear, the new proprietor of
the South Side store has placed Mr..
Palmer in charge and his son is also
expected here sometime this week to
assist.
John c. Hardman accompanied
party of stock fanciers out TO his
Oakside Stock farm Tuesday after
noon but we did not learu that any
sales were made???
| DR.. w. r.. Koob aud family went
to Extra Tuesday to see the parade
Of the Glidden tourists and from
there went with them as far as
Guthrie Center where bounteous
lunch was partaken of.
Joe James of Elk Horn and his
brother DIR. James, of Klmballton
were in town a short time Tuesday
on their way in the latters auto
from viewing the anto tourists as
they passed through Extra.
Harry Nymand, while setting in
front of the blacksmith shop hold
ing the reins of his horses, they sud-
denly took fright at an auto and ian
off heading for the big bridge few
rods south but when near it they
veered little to one side,
crashed into the railing aud Cover the
| high bank into the creek but without
any damage being done to either hor-
ses or vehicle. When the team struck
the railing, Mr.. Nymand had jumped
to the ground thus avoiding what
might have been a serious injury to
himself.
The Ladies Aid Society on last
Thursday evening gave a Tsupper,
which from the standpoint Of cult
nary art, could hardly be surpassed.
During the evening, Messrs .Frank
Jenkins and A. r.. Andersen conduc-
ted "Scenic Brayton" excursions in
their autos, charging a small fare,
the receipts, from this source,
amounting to $l7, being generously
turned over to the ladies, which to-
gether with the So receipts from
the supper, amounted to 500 all told
The ladies desire to thank all who
so generously contributed to! and pa.
tronizsd the enterprise, which as s
social and financial success is withou,
a precedent.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
Announcement

To My Former Customers and
Friends:
Having disposed of my general
stoc. of Merchandise to Mr.. YIN.
Bear of Anita, wish to express my
sincere thanks for their liberal pa
troDage during the years we have
been in business in this town and
hope the same may be given my sue
cessor. AS | wish to close out my
books as soon as possible | kindly ask
you to come and settle NOW if you
are indebted to US. | will be at the
store for the present where my books
will be found.
Respectfully Yours
Hans Hansen,
Brayton, la.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30

they left and they are vel
pleased with their venture to secure
homes Of their own.
The following are the farmers who
marketed hogs the past week: S. F.
Gilman 5S, Hans Mortensen So, ia
cob Warner 81. w. Armstrong 30,
Tom Christensen 20, Geo. Kyhn 20,
Hans Rattenborg, G. Jayne aud An
ton Nelson II each, inc. Jensen 10
besides number who sold less than
10 in number.
Nels Rattenborg and wife arrived
last week from Rochester, MINI. at
ter an absence OF three weeks during
which she submitted to an operation
in which her case has proven sue
cessful as she is much improved in
health and if something unforeseen
does not take place she will soon be
her former self again a stout hearty
| woman.
Andrew Nelson had smash, up
near the old Parm Curtis farm in
southeast Greeley one day last week
when an auto, the humber of which
he took came up behind his vehicle
and without the warning whistle at.
tempted to pass him causing tn,
team to run away throwing him ont
OF the buggy: but he held on to thu
lines and was dragged twenty OF
more feet before he let go. He il
bruised considerably, the buggy bad
ly damaged but the horses escaped
unhnrt. The end ia not yet if Mr.
Nelson can trace the car to the ow.
ner or driver.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
Farmers Attention

Beginning July lst and continuing
during the crop season, parties de-
string the Governments weather re-
port for each following day, can pro-
cure the same by calling upon the
Brayton Central Telephone office
each dey between and O'Clock p.
IN. This will mean the saving of a
great deal of both time and money to
those who pay attention to the pre-
dictions contained therein and act &C
cordingly.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
SHE ALMOST REMEMBERED.

Little Josephine, aged four, was in
tently studying the pictures ip a book
and seemed very much interested in a
picture of Charles Dickens.
Taking the book to her mother, she
inquired who it was.
That is Dickens, DEAR" said her
mother.
The picture was wonderfully fascin
ating to the little girl, and when her
big sister came from college in the
evening she ran and got the book
turned to the picture, and said:
Sister, see! This is picture OF
Mr.. Darn
Her sister replied, "No, dear; that
is Mr.. Dickens"
Well" said Josephine, 81 knew ii
was some kind of swear word" -
Delineator.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
The Conservation OF Nature $ Resour-

Applies as we'll to our physical state
as to material things. C. J.. Budlong,
Washington, r. |. realized his condi-
ton and took warning before it was too
late. He says: suffered severely from
kidney trouble, the disease being here
ditary in our family. have taken four
bottles of Foley's Kidney Remedy and
now consider myself thoroughly cured.
This should be a warning to all not to
neglect taking Foley's Kidney Remedy
until it is too late" Sold by all drug
gists.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
HAMLIN
y SSgz5S21z5SlsSzs5S1ssS1zSgs

Gill Petty made business call in
Extra Tuesday.
Miss Anna Christensen is sewing
this week for Mrs Nels Mortensen,
Jr.
Nelson & Son shipped 8 cars of hogs
and Car of corn 10 market the past
week.
Mrs. Peter Nissen visited Saturday
and Sunday near Extra with Mrs.
Alfred Miller.
The Danish Brotherhood will give
a dance in their hall Saturday eve
ming, July 2nd.
Mrs. VIM. Olsen is visiting this
week with her daughter, Mrs. Jacob
Jasobsen of Greeley.
Nj k Otiesen of Sharon had horse
killed by lightning Saturday. Loss
covered by insurance.
Olsen and Rattepborg sold some
cattle to Northup, the Audubon stock
buyer one day recently.
L. c. Larson bot nice bunch of
steers of Geo. McNary Tuesday which
were delivered in Hamlin.
Fred Nissen near town had two
head OF cattle killed by lightning in
Saturday evenings storm.
Peter Nelson, wife and girl went
to Extra Tuesday TO see the Glidden
tourists pass through there.
Hans Aagaard inside business call
in Brayton Tuesday, Simon Chris
Jensen ticking charge of the lumber
yards.
A load of people went out to Mar
tin Mortesen's Monday and assisted
the lady Of the house to properly OBJ
serve her birthday anniversary.
We are informed that Mrs. Peter
Larsen, southwest of Hamlin sub
mitted to an operation last Sunday
with good prospect Of recovery.
Prof and Mrs. X. G.. Lancelot of
| Scranton went to Extra Monday af-
ter paying visit to her brother,
i Chas Higgins aud wife east of town.
Mr., and Mrs. Nels Mortensep, Sr.
went out to the home of Mr.. Andrew
Christotfersen Sunday to- assist the
good hostess in celebrating her 18th
brit day on Monday.
The s'man hole' of the Creamery
here sprung leak Saturday which
has been giving those in charge lots
of trouble but Tuesday a new one
was about completed so no serious
damage will result.
Chas Armstrong and sister Edith
are here from their homesteads in
Colorado for months visit with
relatives and old friends They re.
port their crops looking fine when
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-06-30
DANGEROUS Risk.

Look out, Hi" shouted the farm
er's wife as the big balloon scared
over the farm with trailing anchor.
Them thar arynaughts will hook
yeou up like fish if yeou don't watch
out"
Gosh, Mandy" gasped the old
farmer as he dropped his rake. "Yeou
don't think they'd try to do sech a
thing purposely, do yeou?"
Wouldn't trust them, Hi. That
tall chap looking down here with the
eyeglass is one of them thar Indiana
writer folks and he's working on a
book called The Uplifting of the
Farmer Reckon yeou better keep
yeour eye on that anchor"