The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1910-03-31
IN THE SMOKING
COMPARTMENT
BY c. s. YosT.

Pomona. as he contemplated the black
and pudgy cylinder in his hand, that
cigar cost the man who gave it to me a
good. honest dollar-and it's punk. That's
what it is-it's punk"
Il never smoked many dollar cigars,
nor even many 50-cent ones" remarked
the red-headed man in the corner. but
L never tackled one that / didn't regret
it. My taste may be low. but | believe
that a cigar that sells at three for a half
is about the limit of excellence and a
three for a quarter is good enough for
ordinary consumption"
1T all depends upon circumstances"
observed the traveller from Louisville.
A straight ten will usually satisfy me-,
but the best cigar | ever smoked cost
NE a cool $1,000, and it was Il Wheeling
stOgie ut that. Moreover, it was worth
the money"
"A MAJ can't lay down Il proposition
of that kind i'll the smoking compartment
without offering an explanations" said
the red-headed person.
Don't shoot" cried the Louisville pas
senger. III explain, but | beg leave to
amend my statement. The best cigar l
ever snoked-the aforesaid Wheeling
stogie-was never smcned ut all. l keep
il in Il glass case decorated with silver
filigree. and for seventeen years it has
rested on my Office desk, where | can see
it every time j sit down TO work. 1t
cost me $1,000, as ] told you, and I'd
have to be mighty hard up before l
would sell it for another thousand"
Come. come, nOw," protested the red
headed one. next thing you'll be trying
TO make us believe that stogie's a fairy
wand"
either said the Kentuckian, but it
doesn't cast a spell over anybody but
me. I'll tell lou now L got that stogie.
There was an old fellow named Mitchell
who run petty much everything in the
Michigan town where l was raised He
was president of the bank, owned the
general store, ran Il big farm and was
the main pillar in the fresbyterian
church. He owned Il good part of the
town and he bossed all of it. He was
cranky and grabbed, sour as winter ap-
ples in July, and the closest tightwad
you ever saw. There were only three
things in the world he cared anything
about. The first was his daughter, the
prettiest girl in the county-jolly, gen.
erous-everything that the Oh man
wasn't. The second was his horse,
Jerusalem. 4 blue blOoded bay that
could walk away from anything in that
section of the state; and the third was
his Wheeling stogies. He bought 'em
by the thousand and he smoked 'em from
getting up to gong to bed: Nobody
ever saw Mitchell without he had one of
these black sticks stuck in his face, eX-
! cept when he was at church, and some
folks said that he even smoked 'em in
bed.
you can make a rou-h guess that
nobody loved Mitchell but his daugh-
ter. but you can bet your life that
every young buck in the nelghborhood
had his cap set for her. And it wasn't
altogether on account of the old mans
money. either. She'd have been easily
the most popular girl in the town if
she hadn't had a cent. But counting
Mary Mitchell wasn't an easy job. She
could wrap the old man around her lit
tie finger and make him loosen up his
pocketbook without a groan, but when
il came to lovers he guarded her with
the ewes of a hawk and the teeth Of a
bulldog. No young man could call on
Mary unless her father was present,
and il was a mighty cold reception he
gave any of us. Some of the boys could
never get any farther than the front
door. and | was one of those not on
the old mans visiting list. | asked him
one day, point blank, what he had
against me, and he said: Nothing at
all. sir. but l don't like your looks
Mary, as I've told you, was different.
You'll all wonder why, but she did like
my looks. There's no way to account
for women's tastes in the matter of men.
was probably the ugliest y%oungster Ill
Hillsdale, and didn't cut any particular
dash III society, but Mary, somehow OF
other. favored me more than any Of the
rest of the boys, and, although L was
tabOoed at her house, | got to see her
at other places. All my rivals tried to
get into the old mans good graces with
soft soap. | made up my mind to take
the other track. l was studying law
u - - n.+ -,~-01E nlaa+n1 ~ ~ nIo an
in the city council. Then l opposed
everything that Mitchell wanted. For
two years l fought him tooth and nail,
but the old man was a good hghter
himself, and he respected any other good
fighter, even if he hated him. | had
reason to believe that he hated me quite
a plenty. He ordered his daughter never
to speak to me under any circumstances
and instructed his houseman to sic the
dogs on me if [ came around the house
while he was away. And yet he him
self would nod whenever we met, and
sometimes he would even go so far as
to shake hands. Queer old character he
was.
HE reminded me, a good deal of Gen.
Grant. He wasn't given to talking, but
let somebody mention horses and his
tongue would begin to wag. One day
I passed by his store when he was sit
ting out in front Dragging about Jeru-
salem to a half a dozen fellows. That
horse o. mine he was saying. can beat
anything that wears hair Just to an
| .noy him, | butted i'll.
~"'Shucks.' I says, that old bag o
bones couldn't run away from a COW.
He's q has-been.'
"'That amt so! That ain't SOP he
yelled, hammering the walk with his
stick. He's the fastest animal in the
state Of Michigan, and you know it, you
young rascal
".Colonel.' I says everybody called
him colonel. you're a buffer, and I'm
just going to call you. I'll bet you S1OeOO
against one of YOU stinkin' old stogles
that / can produce a horse that can beat
Jerusalem and not half try
"'You know L don't bet says he. so
mad his voice trembled, and its you
| that's blufin.' but, by crackey,' says he
T1l go you. I'll go you!
"tAll right, colonel" 1 said; it's a go.
| You put up your stogie and I'll put up
my thousand, and we'n pull it of at the
county air.
"He didn't say anything more. but he
| shook kis stick in my face, and went
] into the store. too mad to speak.