davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
There was,

The disheveled bard entered thu
Weary-eyed editors apartment
els there an opening here for a
poet?' he inquired.
Yes, indeed" replied the editor,
touching a button underneath his desk,
and the next instant the poet disap.
peared through a trapdoor in the floor.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
He Knew.

Young Lady-What do you
mend for q brother?
Clerk-That depends upon whether
hes your brother or some other
girls.
Young lady blushes.
Clerk. watching her-That being
the case. right this way. please
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
More TA.. one way.

The caller, q man whom he had
known In the old town back In Penn.
sylvania. had dropped in to talk old
tfmes with the busy lawyer, and the
lawyer had endured It patiently for
an hour and halt. Then. unseen by
the caller, he pushed a small knob at
the end OF his desk. and = bell rans
In the adjoining com.
Excuse me . moment. MI. Hocken.
spluttcr." he said. stepping into the
other room and proceeding % hold THU
opeesided conversation Over IN imas
fnAfy telsphoas:
s.sFlello!!"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
The clocks Annoying Habit.

Mrs. Benham had just seated herself
to work at a bit of embroidery that
required particular care and attention,
when there came a ring at the tele-
phone. Il just know that's Mrs. Gum
N.Y." she said, as she laid down her
work and went to answer the call.
Whenever l am unusually busy and
haven't any time to spare. she rings
me UP and talks to me by the hour
She was right. 1t was Mrs. Gum
my, who vas fully as talkative as ever.
She began with a long story, and when
fairly in the middle Of it the clock
on the wall of the room began to
strike.
wait a moment" interrupted Mrs
Benham. Il can't hear you until this
noise stops"
What made that noise" asked Mrs.
Dummy, after it had ceased.
1T was only the clock" answered
the patient Mrs. Benham. You know
it always strikes once or twice when
we get to talking"
The conversation did not last Ions
after that.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
The Promissory Promoter.

Did you use any money in your
campaign"
Certainly not" answered Senator
Sorghum. THAT sort of thing has
been discredited. A mar who has any
real financial ability should be able
to do business with a glit-edged pros,
Observation-Disclosures Star.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
Fair, Fat ana Ttde-y.

A Kansan sat on the beach at At
1antic City watching a fair and very
tat bather disporting herself in the
surf. He knew nothing OF tides and
he did not notice that each succeed
Ing wave came a little closer to his
feet. At last an extra big wave wash
ed over his shoetOps.
Hey, there!" he yelled at the fair,
fat bather. Quit yer jumpin' up and
down! Dye wan to drown me?"-
Everybody's.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

Depends on circumstances
Mrs. Palmer-An auto is declared
to be a safe place in a thunderstorm.
Mrs. Wilson-Not If the storm is
caused by the price of the auto
Harper's Bazaar.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
Ga.olin~ woulan,, Hello.

Redd-Ycu say the couple eloped In
the fathers AUTOMOBILE?
Greene-Yes.
Cant the old man trace them?'
mo, he's got such a cold In hil
head he can't smell anything."-Yon'
kers Statesman
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

where Charity Her Own.
Mrs. Brown-We're so glad to seq
you give all the craps to the cat.
Susan!
The New Treasure-wot l SEES, mum.
is-be good to the cat, int you may
ave arr your washing up.-Tit-Bits.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
81 - tests Z
x4izI|&zeoD tie y
- 1':1o&esnzfbs


A Long Job.
Where have you been for so long?'
asked the head man of the menag'
erie.
Been watching one OF the animals
clear his throat, sir" replied the at
tendant.
But does 1t take half an hour for
an animal to clear its throat?"
Yes. sir; 1t vas the giraffe, sir!"
-Yonkers Statesman.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
A Good Loser.

john she asked, do you even
play poker for profit?"
NO." he replied, thoughtfully; "tha
game serves as my RAJ of being char.
itable."-Philadelphia North Ameri.
can.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

Aurora-Why are commuters A.
ways 80 thin?
Borealis Probably because they
train down every day.-Yale Record.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
pe..ima.t,c.

what a pessimist Brown L."
Whats the matter now?"
HE even bewails the fact that n
can't live to collect his life insurance.
Free Press.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

part company. You can have my car
riage for the ride to Tokyo. I've had
an instructive half-hour with you and
I appreciate your f~orbearance In sub
hitting to so long a c~ross-examina-
ton. Good-by and good luck to you
both"
with these words the Japanese
handed two cards to the marines,
shook hands, got a party OF bowling
servitors, while the carriage started
for Tokyo.
Bet he was a big gun all right, all
right observed one of the marines,
rejecting, leaning back among the
cushions and taking the card from his
pocket.
And he a In English script upon
the card were two lines of print which
read: Marquis Hirobumi Ito, G. G. B.,
prime minister of Japan
We Cannot Afford Bad Government
Nothing is so foolish as to tell Bust
ness that it ought to be good, says
Charles Edward Russell in Success
Magazine. Evolution will take care
of that. Either Business will come 70
be operated on broad, clean, humane
methods, looking far ahead to great re-
suits, or it will defeat itself and man
will be compelled to find some other
source Of primal supplies.
For instance, the vice and graft al.
lance, although it enhances the days
receipts, does not really pay in the
long run. You can not in any city
have a wide-open policy without very
great waste. That is inevitable. If
you sanction graft in one way you
sanction 1t in all ways. Booming red
light districts mean a lax city admin.
istration with loot of the city treasury,
dirty streets, bad pavements, reckless
appropriations and a municipality
down at the heels. Inevitably and al
ways it mean just this. In time AL
these conditions react upon Business.
The game isn't worth the candle.
Taxes and bond issues increase, dust
from the dirty streets Injuries goods
and spreads disease, the bad transpor-
tation service keeps customers away,
the stolen assessments multiply on
your heads.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
rhe CarefuI snepper.

What = thisr' inquired the dealer.
that's : cigar stump" explained
the shopper. .One Of the kind my
husband smokes. I want to match It.
Got anything In that shade?"-Kan-
City journal.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
A Dark

Made any resolutions dis yeah?"
Yes, sab; rs resolved not to eat
eggs till de price goes down. Maybe
dey'd be mo chickens II We all done
de same."-Brooklyn Citixen.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
A Valuable Voice.

Farmers Wife--"1 near your son IL
making money out of his voice at the
opera"
Byles-'That's right, num-"
Farmers wife-"Where did he learn
singingy"
Ryles-'oh. e don't sing, num-. u
calls the carriages!"-Tit-Bits
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

Many q mans wife prevents him
from losing . lot OF money In spscu-
lating by not allowing him any to
speculate with.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
Maa Is Keep o..

'.I didn't know you intended to go
around the world"
II didn't when ] started. But 1
went through Europe without tipping
and va afraid to turn back."-Kan-
80 City Journal.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
h Protector.

Old Maid-T'm SO alarmed lest = MAJ
should attempt to kiss me In the tn
mel.
Pretty Passenger-Well. you needn't
worry about that while I'm here.-Nss
gendprfer Blaetter.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
IncI.dinx the TRIMMINGS.

Do they serve elegant meals at
that restaurant"
Perfectly gorgeous! They combine
the maximum of finger bowls with the
minimum of food"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
CeneGs Lac.

How q your sOQ standing In COT
leGs?"
ON crutches. He was initiated into
fraternity last week."-Cieveland
Plain Dealer.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
seriOn. oue.ttor.

He-I could waltz ON to heaven with
you.
she-can Q reverse!-Yale Rec.
ord.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
He O.ght to Have Knov..

"0 O0Bm0 10 1tWVG NhOWAe
DO you love me well enough to mar.
ry me, dear?",
How can you ask that. Henry, when
I love you we'll enough to risk my life
In your machine."-Boston Herald.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

Even the man who admits that he
caught only one fish may lie sbest ~
weight.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
Not Her Own.

Her c~elluloid comb took fire."
Gracious! Did she have it on?"
YES"
Did it smoke much?"
Just a couple of puffs."-CleveIand
Plain Dealer.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
society.

Society is a funny thing"
Why"
After a coming out you are all in"
Lampoon.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
Genuine Alarm

Madam, your pet dog bit my little
boy in the face this morning"
"Oh. you alarm me! Had your little
boys face been antiseptically wash
ed?"
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22

A graveyard is the last msasurs .
resorts to.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1910-04-22
"Of course not. /"

OI Course nOC. i
Good heavens, woman! How could
o let the little darling run such a
risk! James, telephone at once for
the veterinarian. Baltimore Ameri-
ran Lr. ".
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18

If you are interested in good Nor
NAL School, it will be to your advan-
tage to write to the Lock Haven State
Normal School for its handsome cata-
log. The beautiful scenery in the west
branch of the Susquehanna in the i'm
mediate neighborhood is finely illus
trated as well as the great buildings of
the institution. AS a progressive
school,it insist on having a thoroughly
well trained faculty. By referring to
the catalog, anyone interested can
qui ckly discover that every teacher
has chad superior college and uni
versity advantages. The fall term be-
gins September 9Th.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18

Prof w. II hudiae, the veil known
Eye Speoialiat, Of iiughamton, " ",
will be At a. u, hiFsoh'a iewelry
store, Emporium, Pa, August 2T.
~ you can't sea well oF have
headaehs don't lail b. call aud see Prof
hudinu, a. he guarantees o. cure all
such cAssa lenses gfuund and htled
Ia ald frsmss. kysa tested aad "a
Amlnrd free an mork guaranteed
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18
Autoed to Emporium.

The following people composed auto
parties that visited Emporium last
Sunday and were guests at The War
ner: Mr.. and Mrs. Mark Pomeroy,
Misses Bessis King and Adelia Pome-
roy and Mr.. ]. E. Smith, of Port Allie
gany and Messrs. Scott Redfield,
Deputy Sheriff Morrison and "Ted"
Newman of Smethport.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18


tdt card letter or personally.
Joe Workman spent Sunday guest of
his mother at st. Marys.
Chas. s. Mickey, of Shelby, o., has
located in Emporium.
Miss Marion Judd is spending the
week visiting friends at Wilcox.
George A. Walker spent Sunday at
Oil City, Pa, visiting with friends.
Frank Felt is spending a few days at
Olean, N. Y, transa citing business.
Miss Lavina Murray spent Sunday
with friends at Austin and Sizerville.
Miss Verena Hertig was business
caller at Ridgway for a short time
last Saturday.
Mrs. r. Fisher, of Howard Siding,
was in Emporium last Saturday after
noon transacting business.
Miss Helen Cassidy, of Allegany, N.
Y, is guest of the Misses Kelley at
their home on Fifth street.
Arthur Kline and wife, of Sinnama-
honing, were guests of relatives at tLis
place, the first of the week.
Justice B. Nefcy, of Driftwood, was
in Emporium last Friday between
trains, on business mission.
Henry Yeager was business caller
at st. Marys last Friday, returning to
Emporium in the evening
Bellemont Mosser, OF st. Marys, was
Emporium last Saturday afternoon,
consulting DR.. R. P. Heilman.
Mr.. and Mrs. Amos Kresge, of Du-
Bois, we're Emporium visitors last Fri
day morning between trains.
The Misses Allie and May Lincoln,
of Philadelphia, are guests of w. II.
Howard and family, Sixth street.
Miss Regina Schaut, who has been
guest of the Misses Louise and Ida
Seger for the past week, returned to
her home at st. Marys last Saturday.
Miss Gertrude Germon, the very
efficient teacher, leaves next week for
Bedford, Oregon, where she has a con-
tract to teach the young ideas how
to shoot"
James Logan and wife, of West
Greek, called TO inspect the PRESS
plant on Tuesday. They also carried
away a receipt for one years subscrip-
tion TO this popular loral journal.
Mrs. Thomas Radigan returned TO
her home at this place last Sunday
after spending "a few weeks guest at
the home of her daughter, at Mt.
Holly, y. j.
Miss Mary and Master Edward Weis-
man, of Olean, y, \ are being enter
tanned "a guests at the home of their
grand-parents, Joshua Bair and wife,
Fifth street.
Mr.. and Mrs Jas y. Creighton and
daughter, Miss Ethel and son Master
John, accompanied by Miss Marion
Brady, visited at Buffalo and Niagara
Falls last week, returning to Empori-
am Saturday evening.
Messrs. Max. r. Balcom aud Russell
NJ, MeQuay returned To their homes at
this place, last Sunday, after spending
ten days in most delightful trip
which included a visit at Duluth, Chi
oago aud other western points, making
the trip via the Great Lakes.
Miss Ellan Wood, OF Coudersport,
was guest Of her grand mother, Mrs
l.. t. Lay, of The Warner last Sunday,
Mrs, Lay IN company with her grand,
daughter departed for Jersey city
sunday night where they will Walt 70
latsyes.
Miss beokwith who has spent the
summsr Ia Emporium, guest At 1ha
hame Of rtay aud Mira. ]. l.. Bogus,
viii e. 20 Elmira this @osk where she
sill make = short yislt aud sill then
go 10 oleau, y g. where she viii
tsaoh languages a 'ha High school at
that place, duriag the ooming school
rear
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18
From Sickness to"Excellent Health. y

SO says Mrs. Chas Lyon, Peoria, H.
81 found in your Kidney Pills a prompt
and speedy cure for backache and kid
ney trouble which bothered me for IN any
months. | am now enjoying excellent
health which | owe to Foley Kidney
Pills" For Sale by Emporium Drug
Co.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18
Manufacturing Men.

To qualify for 5000 to $1,000 office po-
sitions. A 10 months course is suffi-
cient. Westbrook Academy, Olean,
n. Y.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18
WILLIAMS GROVE PICNIC.
Reduced Rates via Pennsylvania
Railroad

For the Grangers' picnic at Williams Grove,
Pa, August 29 to September 8, the Pennsylvania
Grove from stations in Pennsylvania and from
Baltimore Elmira, Frederick ard intermediate
stations on the Northern Central Railway, Aug
ust % to September 2, inclusive, good for going
passage to reach original starting point not
later than September 6, at reduced rates.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18
Wanted.

Washing or ironing, or work by the
day. Will take Office cleaning. En-
quire OF PRESS Office, 27-2t.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1910-08-18

PER RSONAL GOSSIP.

Contributions inuited. That which you tDould
tike to in this department. let us knotD by pos
ldt card, letter or personally.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27
ANNUAL SWEETEST ON
All Sections~of the Country Represent
ed at Convention of U. S. Hay
Fever Association.

Bethlehem, N. H. Aug. 26.-The
annual convention of the United
States Hay Fever Association begar
here today and for the next week OF
so there will be a grand eXemplifica
ton of every variety of sneeze, from
the false" or cat sneeze to the
real, robustious roof raising affair that
always gets laugh in public.
All sections of the country are rep
resented in the membership of the as
ISOLATION Not only have they been
getting together annually for thirty
seven years, but they bring out a
booklet each year, with all the infor-
nation that can be obtained about the
disease, its remedies, and the places
where the sufferers are exempt. No
one place meets every mans needs
but Bethlehem is said to hold the rect
ord of exempting the largest proporf
ton of sufferers and as consequences
this palce is always chosen for the
annual meetings.
Samuel A. Harlow of Grafton, Mass.
has been the president Of the associal
ton for many years. The secretary is
William H. Patterson of New York
City. The gathering opens with an
address. by the president, followed by
the annual report of the secretaryE
When these and other formalitie$
have been concluded the convention
begins its deliberations with the singL
ing of the associations anthem, bel
ginning:
Blow, bugle, blow, set the wild
echoes flying" Fl
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27

St. Louis, Brownsville and Mexico
srailway, at 2:S0 Thursday afternoon
Young Thornton was killed instantly
and his father j. NJ Thornton, and
Winters will probably die. The
driver, j. B. Blake, is also badly hurt
and was n such state of mind when
brought here that he was unable to
give the name of the third party in
jured. All of the injured were picked
up by the train crew and brought to
Mission, where medical aid was sum-
moned. San Antonio is said to be the
res, dence of the unfortunates. Ac-
cording to statements made by several
passengers and by part of the train
crew it seems probable that the
driver attempted to cross the track
ahead of the train, which was making
good time, and it is thought that the
driver attempted to reverse his car
when he saw that danger was immi-
nent, but that his clutch failed to
work and the car was shot in front
of the moving train by it's own Volt
ton. The spot where the accident &C.
Cured is on very sharp curve and
a small house obscured the vision of
the driver and it is possible that he
was upon the track before he saw the
train.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27
ton from Washington that it would

ton from Washington that it would
not be acceptable.
In 1896 the present secretary of
state was sent to Canada as special
legate to settle dispute over what
was known as the Manitoba school
question He remained, for six or
seven months, visited the principal
cities of Canada and the United
States, and so conducted his investi-
cations that both the Manitoba gov
eminent modified its action and the
Catholics became reconciled to the
new regime and ceased to fear for the
aggress:ons against their religion. The
pope's encyclical letter" sent after
Merry del Val had returned to Rome
and reported to him, closed the COM
troversy, evidencing a signal triumph
won by the young delegate.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27

Miss Mertle Brown, Miss Mira Ben
ham, Mrs. j. D. Carter, Miss Fannie
Terrell, Miss Eliza CASTOR, Miss Par
rle Garrett, Mrs Callie Guile, Miss
Lucy Grissett, Albirdie Green, Mrs. A
Nelly Johnson, Nettie Moore, Mrs. Lee
lar Malcolm, Miss May Moseley. Miss
Josie Organ, Miss NJ L. Roberts, Miss
Kate Smith, Miss Motley Shaw, Mrs.
Lizzie Turner, Mrs. C. V. Walston.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27
FAVOR CHRISTIAN UNITY
Representatives of Evangelical AL
lance of London Arrive In Que
bee on important Mission.

Quebec, Aug. 27-The venerable T.
J. Madden, archdeacon of Liverpool,
and the Rev. George H. Hanson of
Belfast, Ireland, arrived in Quebec
Friday from England. These men
come as the representatives of the
Evangelical Alliance of London and
their mission is to promote the move
ment looking to a closer cooperation
between the evangelical churches of
Canada and those of England and
other countries. They will attend the
church congress to be held in Halifax
visit many of the leading cities Of
Canada.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27
Lest You FORGET.

The School of Business begins its
fail term next Monday. We are proud
of our record of the past year. Our
graduates are all at work, and quite
number have secured positions be-
fore completing their course. Some
are earning more each month than
their course cost them.
The demand for competent office
help is always greater than the sup
ply.
Do not wait until a position is Of
fered you before you begin to make
preparation for it. 1t will be TOO
LATE.
Come to see us at College or call
us up, phone 1877, and request us to
come and see you.
Respectfully,
H C. jameson,
24-2t Principal.
Palestine daily herald. [volume] (Palestine, Tex.) 1902-1949, 1910-08-27
Mems List.

Ennis Burres, Ben R. Brooks, T. w
Carpenter, Harry Curtis, George Copp
Jerry Evanson, Charlie Ford, Alder
Foot, Clifford Howard, A. M. Harvey
Landrum Harris, G. NJ. Heiges, Dave
Hollands, Luther Holt, Walter Hen
derson, w. H. Lockett, Jasper Moore
Oliver Manley, Colby E. Marshall
Mosella hurry, L. H. Robinson, Sims
Simons, j. Milton Turner, Bethel
Watson, j. w. Williamson, H. R
West, H. W. Walker, Perkins Bros.