The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1910-06-14
Grandma S Ride
BY NJ QUAD
Copyright, 1910. by Associated Lit
erary Press
BY M QUAD

fifteen had lived with her son Zadoc
and his wife.
She broke her arm.
Grandma. you are seyenty.eight
years old, and I'm afraid this is the
end of things" said the doctor
That's what I'm thinking myself"
she replied Please prop the up in
bed want to go over things little,
doctor. | haven't had much fun in
this world. At the age of ten fell
OF the barn and broke four ribs"
Yes. I've heard So"
"When ! was twelve | chopped of
one of my toes. At fifteen horse ran
away with me and broke my right leg.
At seventeen | slipped on the ice and
broke the other"
Yes"
"At twenty | was almost drowned in
mill pond At twenty-five ! married
Moses SpooDer. Doctor. Moses vas a
poke Of a man. He could hardly keep
out of the way Of d haystack. lie was
always wanting to rest. ] was almost
glad when he died
Since you knew me | have had
bug in my ear. fallen down stairs. been
bitten by snake, hooked by COW,
blowed up with kerosene. twisted my
ankle, fell out of a tree and had vari-
Gus boues broken. This breaking my
arm is about the last of me, aint it?"
1--WE will hope not, but
"Oh, talk 1t right out, doctor. You
can't scare me none"
"As | told you. it's serious"
I'm feeling that way. | reckon my
days are over. but I'm not complain
! ing. Do you know, | never went to a
circus?
"You didn't"
"Never. ! always had broken leg
or something when there was circus.
spelling school or party. | never went
huckleberrying. | never skatcd or slid
downhill. | never saw mad dog or
| balloon. | never went to a church
picnic. I've always had broken bones
| on hand or been down with sickness.
/ ought to have some little fun in life,
hadn't /: | ought to have seen a dog
fight or something"
bulCl yOu ltDlIGu lllG uOSlOts
land am sorry for you"
''Then L want you to do something
for me. I've been whizzing along all
my life, and l want to go out of it on
the whiz. want Zadoc to go to town
and hire one of them autos and take
me for q ride, and i want you to fix
me up for it. I've got to go, but
want to go having fun"
You've got fever, and it will in
crease It,"
II can't help it."
Moving you in and out of the auto
will be very painful"
But I'm used to it. tell you. doc
tor. Pm going to have some fun TO end
up on if have to jump down the well.
It's my due. | jest want to laugh good
and hearty once before / CO."
The doctor wrestled with grandma
for the best of an hour. and then Ia
doc was called in to decide. After lis
teniDg to the arguments he said:
"Why, it looks all right to me.
Seems as If mother ought to have some
fun after all these years. She hain't
got any new bones to break"
The doctor put 1t Off another day.
and then, thinking that the worry was
as bad as the fever, he gave consent.
Zadoc went to town and hired IN auto
and chauffeur. aud the broken woman
was carried out with all due precau-
tions and seated in it. She was in good
spirits from the brandy the doctor
gave her.
81 hope you amt blaming me any,
Zadoc," she said as the machine moved
off
mot a mite, mother"
"You know I've got to be seventy
eight years old?"
Yes"
"And you can't remember ever hear
ing me even giggle, can you?"
mo. mother"
always had broken bones or some
thing to keep me from feeling good.
You was going to take me to the cir
Gus two years ago, but ] fell down the
cellar stairs the day before"
YES"
You was going to take me TO camp
meeting last year. but ! run Il rusty
nail into my foot"
$50 you did"
"And we was talking of going to
picnic next week, and / went and
broke my arm"
"Yes."
But guess I've got pretty nigh
the end. Zadoc. Is there smile on my
face?"
"Why, mother. there surely is1'
"And l feel like giggllng Yes, sir,
Zadoc. ! believe I'm going 10 be tic
kled after all these years! You won't
mind it. will you?"
Not bit, mother Go ahead and
grin and giggle and laugh"
''Then tell him to put on the whiz.
It's great, Zadoc. It's grand Don't
you see me grinning. Can't you hear
me giggling? Seventy-eight years old.
to, crriY, ha first