davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[ From the Atchison Globe. ]

The man who wastes monev for a.
good time, vis"s tie past y good deal
without enjoying it.
81 haven't met a man in years will
ing to admit that he is older than
am."-Parson Irvine
Sell silver dollars for IS cents. and
within a month people will want them
for 80 cents.
Two important ways for avoiding
disappointment are never to fall in
love, or put anything in the oven.
1.-THE trouble with me-" said an
hour and a half and think 10 min
utes."
What his become of the old fash
toned prodigy who studied Latin with
the book propped open in front of her
dish pan?
ing for men than that glance under
the bed before retiring, the situation
would be easier.
The smartest boy in school usually
becomes school teacher. BY the way,
in reading of great men, do you recall
reading of one who began as a school
teacher?
We have noticed that no one ever
calls a man 'twistful eyed" If things
go wrong with him. he is an old sore
head, crouch or beast. but never
''wistful eyed
Mrs. Lysander John Appleton is so
tender hearted that before beginning
to read a death notice. she will get
her handkerchief ready for the flood.
But when she is half through the
notice. and he'd handkerchief is half
soaked, she will suddenly sit up
straight, and with flashing eyes, ex-
claim: ''She was older than thati 1
don't see why people want to tell a
lie like that in a death notice!' Then
she finishes the notice with drv eyes.
The old fashioned woman used her
combings to make hair wreaths which
were hung up in her parlor, and all
the hair the rest of the family also
shed went into buds and blossoms and
leaves and tendrils. There was no
hair TO hang over a chair back at night
in those good old days. If a guest
happened along who hung her hair
over a chair back. she was apt to find
next morning that it was made into
Johnny-Jump-Ups and tiger lilies. and
under a frame
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

LADY, want to put in this advertise
went Toni ii IT? ccG er VIII go n three lines.
madam. Well have to charge YOU for
I ieoIz lines. but you can put IN four more
e you Yt5h hSsy SsgiGSsRdS in
posite cornerw-rit-Bits.
How old are you, my dear7' Eight
by train and six when 50 out with
mamma. bon Vivant.
Norah-Why do you call me your Jewel.
Patrick? Officer Clancy-Bekase your eyes
loike pearls and even your voice has an
emerald ring to tt!--Browning's Magazine.
Prospective Patient-what are your
charges. doctor? Doetor-IIalf a crown a
don't want you to come on q visit; we
only want you to stay ten or fifteen min
utes.-The Sketch.
Citrate Ito wife-beater)-But. NV good
man. can you and your wife not live to-
gether without fighting? Loafer-No. sir;
"All. the world loves lover" But
not when he's holding a busy public tele-
phone for twenty-minute talk with his
turtle doye."-Louisville Courier-JournaI.
Does he call spade a spade7'' 'TIeav-
ems, mol He calls 1t an Implement for
foot power NJ Agee gee fsh oS
Teacher-Wells Johnnie, what is Il?
Johnnle-Please, teacher, Susie Brown
says she's going to marry me when L
grow up, an don't want her to.-Cleye-
land Plain Dealer.
Mrs. CalleF-Don't you find II rather
difficult to get along without q doueatior
Mrs. Homer-On the contrary, I am now
in position to take an Afternoon of
whenever want to.-chicago News.
.SteIla-The children want TO begin mat
Iinaony on the scale their parents end Il.
Rei1a-Yes, the bride wants as large ALI
mony as her mother.-Judge.
why is Mr.. Jones so popular with you
girls?" '.Oh, he's a deari Why. he doesn't
do anything but tell lies, and none OF us
can catch him at itr-Cleveland Leader.
BY taking the new express, saved %
cago. Finer And then lost II In a
traffic Jam."-Louisville Courier.
''My husband was out late last night.
and this morning found q couple Of aces
in his pocket. I daresay he's been losing
at poker" Don't condemn him without
q hearing. II he carries around aces he
probably won."-Pittsburg Post.
But" said Doggett why don't You
argue the thing out with your wffe7''
'Ohr' replied Meeker, my wife has very
positive views on that subject The mo-
m 1 ! opened my i mouth she would put
think you'd ehoke."-Cathoiic Standard
and Times
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
EDUCATIONAL REBORN.

That the agitation which has been
started in Topeka for a reform of ed
ucational methods in the public
schools is not local one is apparent
TO any one who has the opportunity
Of looking over the newspapers pub
lished in various sections of the
country. 1t is rather unusual to pick
up one of them these days which does
not devote some space to the ideas of
prominent educators or editorial COM
ment on the subject. The charge
seems to be pretty general through
out the land that the elementary
schools, the high schools included, are
falling far short of desired standards
in eqeipping their graduates with a
thorough schooling in the rudimen-
tary branches of study. And that is
che of the chief complaints against
the schools of Topeka.
Under a caption Need for Educa-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

tionaI Reform, the Christian Science
Monitor, the daily newspaper publish
ed in Boston under the auspices of
the Christian Science church, discuss
ed this subject editorially the other
day as follows:
"The attention of President Taft
was called recently to the failure of
the applicants for admission to West
Point and Annapolis by Represen-
tative Champ Clark of Missouri, who
said the young men had been lack
ing in information on rudimentary
subjects. In an address the president
referred to this and expressed the be-
lief that the ambition Of school SUI
perintendents throughout the coun-
try, who have charge of primary and
secondary education, has led US into
neglect of theroughness that we
ought to reform. He said 1t was true
that applicants for admission to West
Point and Annapolis had fallen short
in many instances on subjects that ev-
cry schoolboy ought to know. They
could not spell and were deficient in
other rudimentary branches.
Lack of thoroughness in eiemen-
tary instruction handicaps pupil in
all succeeding studies and courses.
Nothing is more important than that
q good foundation should be laid in
the early undertakings. Then strong
structure may be built up, one whose
walls will not crumble when the tests
come later. Trouble often originates
in the attempts of school boards to
introduce too many subjects. Time
enough for perfection cannot be CIV
en- by the pupils to the subjects that
are most important. Consequently,
the pupils pass along without any FIX
ed or definite knowledge of facts or
principles involved. They stumble oy-
er what follows, whereas, had they
been thoroughly instructed. their way
would have been rendered smooth and
easily pursued. Conscientious educa-
tors cannot fail to recognize that fact
that it is essential to pay closer at
tention to the simple but important
elementary branches, to the end that
they shall be really mastered
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
THE EMMY SIDE.

Life is full of funny things
Jokes not of our making;
10 each act some humor ciings
To set sides a-shaking.
Never mind how dark the day
There's some pleasure in it;
Each sad hour that comes our way
Has its funny minute
If hard luck has swept your path,
Surging like river.
Don't give vent to ears or wrath
Smile-and save your liver.
Somewhere in the diRest need
Want OF friends or money
You'll be sure to strike a lead
Toward the point that's funny
If, perforce. each sense you own
Suffers malnutrition,
Always keep your funny bone
Right in prime condition,
If some power you must invoke
In LIES perturbation,
Let it be-to see the joke
In each situation
-Lurana w. Sheldon. in the New Yorl
Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
POINTED PAKAuRAPHs.
[Fron the Chicago Newe.l

GFrom the Chicago News.J
Many a good fellow makes a bad
finish.
Poets have many triaIs-but few are
convicted.
The chorus girl with a pretty foot al
ways has kick coming.
The milkmaid expects to see a cow
hide when milking time comes.
Better a girl who chews gum than
one who is always chewing the rag.
The cigarette-smoking girl never
shows up in bachelors pipe dreams.
Ever notice that it takes less to make
fat woman laugh than a thin one?
1t takes nine tailors to make a man
and multitude OF collectors to sepa-
rate him from the price Of the job.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
JOURNAL ENTRIES

The unlinGsst cuts of all generally
come from friends.
X X y
You seldom hear of a woman giving
a birthday party for herself.
y 4 X
There is salts faction in the know
ledge that a man without a fault hasn't
been developed as yet.
y ~
A sage once remarked that the soei-
ETY. of women is the best school for the
cultivation of poIiteEess.
= y Il
1t may take all kinds of people to
n AXE a world, but surely few of the
varieties extant would not be missed
very much.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

The general estimate OF Boston
ians will have to be revised. 1t APP
pears that they spend millions of dol
lars annually in the theaters of that
city. And a considerable portion
of the sum goes to the cheaper thea
trical productions and moving picture
shows. Many people have had the
idea that it took a production of a
Shakespearian play without any stage
settings, or something of that sort. to
rouse enthusiasm among the cultured
eaters of beans.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

The supreme court of the United
States has lately annulled two import
ant orders promulgated by the inter-
state commerce commission, on the
ground that it exceeded its authority
in issuing them. Perhaps if the plans
of President Taft for strengthening
the interstate commerce law are act
ed upon favorably by congress, this
commission will have the requisite
authority to do something worth
while before long.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
EpOA OTHER PENS
GYRoscoPE CLAIMS.

After a careful consideration of both
the advantages and the disadvantages
incidental to the use on a single-rail
line of gyroscopic cars. The Scientific
American comes to the conclusion that,
ingenious and scientifically sound as
the system is, its success as a substitute
for that by which freight and passen-
gers are moved will probably be at
best a limited one.
What the new cars, it says, would
save as to weight by decreased num-
Der of wheels they would lose by the
enforced carrying of the gyroScope it
self, and as the latter would have to
be extremely well made, the cost of
the cars would not be decreased.
There would be a saving by the ELI
mination of one line of rails. but the
one remaining would probably be as
expensive as two are now, and it would
necessitate expensive changes in road
bed and bridges by the concentration
of train weight that is now divided. So
far as the passengers We're concerned,
their comfort, especially in going
around curves, would be much in
creased by the change to the gyroscope
cars. but that present speeds could be
doubled with safety and economy, The
Scientific American much doubts. The
only immediate utility of the monorail,
gyroscope railroad seen by this au-
thority is for pioneer lines through un-
famous and billy regions. where many
and sharp curves were necessary
New York Times.
THE MAN WITHOUT ACOUNTRY.
Poor DR.. Cook, He had his little
blaze of glory in the eye of the world,
and now is paying the penalty. An
exile, fleeing from the sight of his
indignant countrymeu, ashamed to face
all men, he sought to hide himself
among strangers, down beyond the
bulge of the arth. But he failed. Even
in Chilli there were eyes to see him
and fingers to point him out as the
most conspicuous liar of this genera
ton.
Cook deceived the world. and the
world will not soon forget that it owes
him a grudge. For the whole world
holds itself wise. and is also inclined
to hero worship, and when its intel
ligence is deceived and its instructive
applause of fine deed betrayed. the
world likes to punish the deceiver
with exquisite angeance.
The repudiated explorer knows now
the full meaning of the retribution he
must pay. In all the earth there is I o
place whe- he NAV hide himself The
furthest continents and the isles of the
sea cannot conceal him. Wherever
civilized men resort there will appear
accusing finger and wagging tongues
Around him will be scorn. and within
him, if he is the deliberate liar the
world thinks him. there will be tor
turc and shrinking of soul. This is
a dreadful penalty to pay for any fault
the knowledge that in all the world
one has no Misunderstanding Plain
Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Building work has started off with
such a rush in Topeka that it won't
be a great while now before there
will be a scarcity of labor among
skilled workers in the building trades.
There are few cities in the country
where the opportunities for many
more skilled laborers are greater
than in Topeka There are places for
hundreds such in the Santa Fe shops
right now
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

It was almost unnecessary for ].
Eads How. the millionaire hobo, to
announce that the unemployed" are
affiliated with the labor unions to
the extent that they will not apply
for places made vacant by strikers.
The unemployed of the hobo type
won't apply for work under any and
all circumstances.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

In all likelihood the women guests
Will lie few and far between at the
banquet which is to be gwen to
President Taf: in Chicago OF March
II, by the Irish Fellowship club. An
edfct has Keen issued by the commit
tee in charge of the affair that the
women attending will not he permit
ted to wear hats.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR.
[From the New York Press. ]

If the public did to corporations
what the corporations do to the public
they'd want to put the whole human
race in jail.
A man can make himself think he's
aiming to be great patriot when what
he's doing IS chasing a public lob.
The chief thing that ksc D vorn~
women from wishing they were men il
they couldn't have such nice. ionr.
wavy hair.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Thirty-ssven persons were the vic
Tins of thin ice on the lakes and riv-
ers of New England during the past
winter. That's bigger death roll for
merely one section of the country than
the football field has rolled up for the
whole country in two years. Why not
abolish skating and other ice sports
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

The populace of Monaco, said to be
the only absolute monarchy remain
ing on the face of the globe, have Pc
titioned their ruler for the establish
ment of a constitutional government.
II their request is granted it viii be
difficult to create such a government
unless some folk from the outside are
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

II is the idea of the New York
World that Cincinnati. with flood
water twenty feet higher than ef-
fete Paris boosted, might well be
pardoned for claiming to be the art
center of the New World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

All those who believe that spirits
from another world got away with
the $4,000 that couple of gullible
doctors of Hutchinson placed on a
table during a seanee should be COM
PEELED to stand on their left ears for
a weak
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

That bill before congress which
seeks to give further protection to
miners against waste and danger
ought to pass with the unanimous vote
of both houses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

called in. The population of Monaco
is only a trifle over 5000 and that
would not provide enough able-bodied
men to NIL half the offices in q new
and modern system of government.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Wichitans certainly did themselves
proud in the entertainment they ac-
corded to the members of the Kansas
state Editorial association. But that's
a habit the people of wichita have.
They shine on all occasions
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Harry Thaw has finally won q VIC
tory IN the courts. But it only is to
the extent of one of his omnivorous
lawyers being enjoined from suing to
collect a fee of some $4,000.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
KANSAS cOMAEMT

INSURANCE. AGAINST TROUBLE.
a pAnk DOWN at HOlyrood, Kan, was
looted by one or more OF It's offtclals
s1a nothing remained apparently but the
Weeks before the public knew any
thing about the trouble, the state bank
commissioner Was practically in pos
session of the bank. cleaning out the
purnt tlmbers. and forcing the remain
ing members of the corporation to
per leaked out of the real truth until
with crash the people of Holyrood
discovered that the bank had been re-
organized, with new capital, the for
that warrants were out for the de-
faulting cashiers. Everything was clean
and safe.
The Holyrood hank episode shows that
1t pays the state to have enough in
sspeetors in the field to keep watch OF
its banks.
A few years ago, there were only
three or four inspectors for the whole
state banking business-S00 banks. Now
there are double that number. me
banks arss inspected more often. The
inspections are more thorough and less
formal.
No doubt hundreds of thousands of
dollars were saved TO the depositnrs
by the efficient banking system. This
one incident pays well for the trouble
OF keeping eight inspectors on the road.
AS far as the expense of the IN
spectors themselves is concerned that
is all paid by the banks. Each bank
pays fee every time it is inspected,
and this money practically runs the
state bank commissioners department.
1t would pay the state, however, to
maintain such system of inspection
even If every dollar of the expense
was paid by taxpayers. 1t is the best
Find of deposit nsuranec.-Salina Jour
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

The unreliability OF the CT o river
IS agsia emphasized by the fact that
one of the big steamboats, which has
been accustomed TO ply it has made
3 comfortable landing in q cornfleld.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Strange things happen occasionally.
The Missouri Pacific has really begun
the work of improving its lines in
KRnSag
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

If Kansas City, Mo-, keeps up its
present gait il will soon be showing
the dust even to Pittsburg, Pa.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is a member OF the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news orr
ganiEation for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka.
The news Ia received in The State Jour-
mai building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
A BROKEN SOLITUDE.

The world is growing considerably
smaller, and he who signs for solitude
may find it hard TO find in any region
which will also produce bread and meat
and raiment. The Dalai Lama has
been deposed, and seeks refuge in
Darjiling. And If they butt in on this
remote ruler, there aren't many real
estate opportunities left in the way of
secluded spots. Tibet has the world
highest mountains: the Himalayas. In
fact, the country is mostly mountains
It's people are a poor, pastoral lot, de-
pending on their f1ocks for a livelihood,
where the pastures are tilted edgewise,
and covered with snow a great deal.
And this Dalai Lama was as different
from the common Oriental potentate as
anything you can imagine: an abstena-
iols recluse, living without LUXURY; d
weak mystic more than ruler. But
the Dalai must have seen it coming,
even before the Chinese troops crossed
his mountain wall. The sacred city Of
Lhasa was invaded by an English ex-
petition few years ago. and Sven
Hedin, the explorer, found his way
there and got out to tell about it.
China is awakening. Tibet has natur-
al resources, and the harmless and the
retiring Lama gives way before the
new order of things. And there isn't
anything in that new order about
solitude, except that solitary confine-
ment is nishmert.-Atchison Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
SOME GOOD CHILDREN.

You can say what you choose about
the Standard Oil methods, but you'll
have to admit that the Rockefeller
children are all right.
The young man. heir to the biggest
private fortune IN the world, is not
spoiled by the fact.
He does not drink booze all night and
sleep all day, he does not run after yell
low headed actresses, he does not keep
a yacht and make 1t a floating carousal.
He INDUCES in none of the usual sor-
did and vulgar joys of the very rich.
He is wholesome and American in all
his tastes and habits.
The children of the Standard Oil
magnates all seem we'll behaved. None
of the Rogers girls, the Morgan girls.
or the Rockefeller girls have married
worthless foreign noblemen; none of
the boys have gotten into trouble with
actresses. Wichita Beacon.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10
HOW He Knew.

In an assault and battery case, tried
in a Cleveland court, the prosecuting
witness testified at length that the de-
PENDANT had knocked him senseless and
had then kicked him for several min
uteS.
eff this mans attack rendered you
unconscious" demanded the magis-
trate, chow is it that you know he
kicked you when you were down?
This question seemed to floor the
witness He was lost in reflection for
some moments; then, Frightening, he
replied:
ST know it, your honor, because
that's what would have done to him
IL I'd got him down.''-Circle Mag
azine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Teacher-Well, Johnnie, what is f.?
Johnnie-Please, teacher. Susie Brown
says she's going to marry me when 1
grow up, an don't want her to.-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Mrs. CalleF-Don't you find II rather
difficult to get along without q domestic
Mrs. Homer-On the contrary, I am n3w
in a position to take an afternoon of
whenever 1 want to.-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10


Students of the crustacea often find
the cod a useful assistant collector.
Thus the circular crab seems to be
a favorite food of Gods and rays and
it was chiefly from the stomachs OF
these fish that some Of the older nat
uralists obtained specimens.
Another hunting ground of the nat
uralist is the sailing ship which has
been in foreign ports. In this way
DR.. Clark has been able to add tiny
CHILEAN crab to the Cornish crustacea.
1t was obtained by Vallentin on the
sides of a bark from Patagonia in a
coating of Seaweed and barnacles.
The crab itself may become a col
Iector of specimens for the zoologist,
for it is often covered with various
species of sponges, hydroids, and bry-
ozoa. Sometimes the species found
thus are such as are not easily OBJ
tainable otherwise. One species OF
crab, indeed (maia squinado), is re-
garded in Cornwall as the provider OF
material for the naturalist.-The
BIOLOGIST.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Stella-The children want to begin mat
'fnlony on the scale their parents end r.
2efla--Yes. the bride wants as large ALI
nony as her mother.-Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-03-10

Citrate Ito wife-beater)-But. my good
man, can you and your wife not live to-
gether without fighting? L.oafer-No, sir;
not 'appily.-M. P.