davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

There il q funny side 20 every
thing" saws Hondo Murphy, and the
funny side to the great and noisy cam
pafgn which closes tomorrow, Is FUR
nished by Dave Leany. Dave u st az
old scout, and he wants 70 earn tne
So. 900 per annum which Stubbs per-
mits the state to pay him. Ths only
thing he sees to do, is 70 oeIeno NE
master, and he IL doing It to the pest
of his ability, and to the great JOY
of every newspaper reaoer VINO en-
joys q funny story.
ssHe reminds me of Uncle John
Barnes, late of Florida Uncle Jonn
was a gigantic timberman noted Tor
stroyer of red liquor. In his business.
he transported large RATS OF pine TIM
Der to market, and on one such occa-
sion, while crossing Tampa Bay on
raft with four companions, encounter
ed an equinoxial gale. The raft be-
gan to to heave and tear asunder. A
footing on the pitching logs be-
came Impossible, and the men were
busily engaged in climbing back, fall
ing off and climbing back. The pros
poets were indeed dismal as Uncle
John climbed out for the 'steenth time
and shook t. water from his whisk-
Boys, he gasped. as he spit out a
quart of the sa1suginous. -doesony OF
you-alls know how tun prax? They
pleaded not guilty.
Can't some of you-alls sing Rock
ed in tn cradle of thuh deep Throw
wout-th' Lifetime err some other rec
ligioua hymn
Nothing doing.
/" 'Nuther can l. shouted Uncle
John, as the log began to roll from un-
der him, but I'll be-(souse! gurle-)
blink ety-dang-blanked II I'm goin'
tub face my Maker without maxim
some effort tub square muhsef. Let's
| take up a collection know how to
| do that
80 it is with Dashing Dave, the Oar
| ing Democrat. He knows that some
thing ought to be done, and the only
thing he knows how to do is to write
and tell the kind of stuff that earned
him the title of King of the Kansas
| Newspaper Takers.
NATURAL HISTORY (Lesson XVIII
| The GUINEA Is freckled bird,
| But when I drew this biped,
| I dropped the spots, because ia heard
They look much better striped.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Most of this is very we'll, 50 far as
It goes, but with all respect to the near
friends of DR.. Hale who undoubtedly
framed the words, they say too much
and not enough. These are general
tiles which do not appeal, in place
of a concrete statement of fact-of
the achievement on which the fame
of Edward Everett Hale chiefly rests
and in which it will abide That is
that he wrote 1.-The Man Without a
Country''-that matchless tale of
what a noble ideal of fatherland and
flag Is. and what must be the repent
ance of the American who in pride
or passion throws that ideal away.
Therefore we take leave to propose
an amendment to that part of the in
scription which is not in DR.. Hale's
own words. We propose an amend
rnent which when rightly considered
is inclusive of all the vitality that
those other words have. and is not a
vague and glittering generality as some
of them are. With all difference to
Intellectual acuteness of Boston we
suggest that inscription on the. front
read:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
QUAKER MED1rA11oNs.
[From the Philadelphia Recorf

[From the Philadelphia Record.l
A boom is big noise, especially in
politics.
The cook who makes bad coffee sell
com makes good.
No. Maude. dear; it isn't every base
ball player who can pitch a tent
Many a mother thinks her da~s,b2.r
is in love when she is merely bilious.
Some women use their religion as a
cloak, and others haven't enough of it
for a bathing suit.
A little boy generally goes on a pic
mic with his sisters and his cousins.
The ants are already there.
A woman always feels sorry for a
man who has trouble with his wife un-
less she happens to be his wife
1t may be all right for some people
to laugh and grow fat, but with other
people it is n. laughing matter.
Even when you unchain the dog of
ar you will generally discover that
their bark is worse than their bite.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
HUzAOQ OF THE D<Y

Abou Ben Adhern had discovered that his
name led all the rest. well" he said.
pn6ppi6s tsar th at whers
Xenophon, whose name was near the foot
Ct the list, be kept rIght on loving his
Bookkeeper-The fact that your grand
father has married again seems to please
Amt got another grandmother ter die
now when I want to go to the ball game?
Boston Transcript.
Ascum-Do you think it's true that Skin
ner has bought place for himself in
iesseG Il fos hes nG to pet he's Is only
out at moments notice.-Catholic Times
ever be able to revive te ea de seisnoe Not
any of my patients"-Houston Post.
Ethel-Jack really won Maud by hard
mean? Embellishments and ice cream
Boston Transcript.
That's the worst card club I ever. be-
ionged to-. What's the matter?'' There
Detroit Free Press.
Il haven't seen anything of your fathers
So 600 check yet. He promised. it. didn't
he? Brfde-Yes, but he heard that your
father had already given us one, and he
knew we shouldn't care to have duplicate
presents--Stray Stories.
How is your wife, John?'' John (the
waiter)-well, don't know. miss. when
the sun don't shine she's miserable, and
If it does shine she says it fades the
carpet.-Catholic News.
Diogenes returned from his search for
an honest man. Given up the chase?''
they inquired. ut became a matter of
necessity" replied the philosopher "Sonae
one stole my lantern.
.Applicant-Did understand you to say
that you accommodate 200 persons at this
hotel? Hotel Proprietor-No. said this
hotel had capacity for 200-Browning's
Magazine
Why do you always jam a thermom-.
eter into the patients mouth? Is the
temperature SO important?' TT saves
listening to a lot of symptoms" Exclaimed
the doctor. briefly.-Louisville Courier
Journal.
How did your act take. amateur
night?'' "Greatl When I sang the first
verse, they yelled Finer and when Z sanS
the next they yelled Tmprisonme Sc
Baltimore Sun.
Farmer Hayrick-Here's where the
Call # Lovers Leap and charss fer TT TT
New York Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
A KANSAS FAILURE.

very unusual thing has happened.
Carrie Nation once gave to the Asso-
cjated Charities of Kansas City. Kan.
a house and ground to be used as a
home for neglected wives of Kansas
drunkards. Now here is the odd fea-
ture. Since the home was prepared
more than year ago there have not
been any neglected wives to make use
of the home. No one has lived in the
home.
One of two things is true: either there
ere no neglected wives of drunkards or
else the drunkards have their bluff SUI
premely mounted over the heads of the
neglected and frightened wives. Or it
is rarely possible that there are no
drrrtards in Kansas who married.
However it is it is a pretty good adj
vertiseneEt for Kansas. How many
states in the Union could go through a
like experience? .o'a2 r.
And now the u11equalled Mrs. Nation
is DESTROYS of selling this home and
tsing the proceeds to build home for
deserted children at Hot Springs, Ark.
And If the same luck awaits the enter
prise there as did the other in Kansas
City, Kan, Mrs. Nation may as veil
conclude that this country is entirely
ard completely evangelical and good
enough for anyone to live in.-Ottawa
Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
A GLIAfPsE OF ARCAny.

Amid the noise and din of busy mart
sometimes close my eyes and in sweet
dreams
Feel the warm glow of summer in my
And see the sparkle of Iow-laughing
streams;
And from the purple hills of Already
Catch the weird music OF an Orfad
throng,
Gliding from hill to Hill. lithe-limbed and
free,
Chanting ever wild and mystic song.
Or, by the margin of some Iimpid pool
Watch long-haired Naiad's sportive play
While Fauns and Satyrs through the
Led on by great Pan. dance in mad
array;
Or oft in dreams. on the fresh earth re-
clined
Hear the secrets whispered by the elfin
Anna J. Roberts. in Chicago Record
Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Colonel Roosevelt has found it nee
essary to deny another of the state
ments which have been made by the
congressional insurgents who have
visited him. They have been quoting
the colonel having said that Mr..
Cannon was the great obstacle in the
way of his efforts to secure good leg
islation for the people throughout the
seven years of his administration. Mr..
Roosevelt now declares that he never
wrote or gave voice to such a state
ment to any one. Almost every sim
gle statement that the insurgent Wis.,
itors to Colonel Roosevelt have cred
tied him with saying and which could
be construed as placing the colonel
in sympathy with the insurgent cause
has been emphatically denied by him
Draw your own conclusions as to the
general veracity of these gentlemen.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Among the scarcest articles these
days are original thoughts.
=
Everybody does lots of things he
can not well afford to do.
Rich people have their worries, and
lots Of them, just as do the poor folk.
::
To the pure all things may be pure.
but the pure are few and far between.
= y
Dumb animals have this advantage.
They never have to fret over where
they Will spend their vacations
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
LFrom the New york Press.1

LFrOm the New OK Pfess-I
The reason q man won't let his
daughter have a certain beau is she's
going to do it anyhow.
It's just as well that people talk
about the weather. else it would be
something still stupider.
A nice, jolly fat girl keeps all those
qualities when she grows old except
the niceness and the holiness.
A thousand men out of a thousand
know water won't run up hill, but es9
of them will bet it will if the odds
are long enough.
Even If a married woman is ready
to unmake her own match she can be
wildly enthusiastic about making one
for somebody else.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Reports come from Chicago that
the United Butchers of America are
working on plans whereby meat will
be retailed to the consumer at prices
at least so per cent cheaper than those
now asked. It is to be sincerely hoped
they get these plans in operation in
the near future
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

1t is a peculiarly constituted mind
which will argue that because two or
three. OF q half dozen schedules in the
tariff law were not revised in a man
ner to suit everybody, the tariff re-
vision, consisting of thousands of
schedules, is an absolute failure. and
not in keeping with the promises of
the Republican party.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
HOME NEWS wH1LE AWAY.

Subscribers OF the State Journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
to any address at the rate Of ten cents
q week or thirty cents a month (by
mail on1y.) Address changed as often
as desired. While out OF town the
State journal win be to you like a
daily letter from home.
Advance payment IL requested on
these short time subscriptions. to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Another instance showing that the
end does not always justify the means
comes from Tarrytown, N. Y. Some
bees located in the steeple of a his
toric church there. A fire was started
to drive them away. Before it was put
out IL had damaged the church edifice
to tho extent of 81. 900.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Two spectators were discussing the
rubber boom, and the question natur-
ally arose as to how long the upward
movement was likely to be main
tanned.
One of them. who has done very
we'll, was inclined to be somewhat pes
simistic.
"You know" he observed to his
friend. something will come along
and spoil this boom. If it isn't home
politics or an outbreak of war it will
be disease among the rubber trees,
which, I'm told, once started. spreads
like wildf1re.''
"Ah,'' retorted his friend, "the dis
ease question is certainly danger
point. But I'm all right as regards
that; the company I'm interested in
hasn't started planting yet!"-London
Financial Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

several states, and the nation in its
supervision over interstate corpora
lions, to pass adequate legislation
which will make it certain that all
classes Of .workmen shall get the COM
pensation due them in case of acct
dents.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Prospects are good that the Texas
legislature, now in session, will pass a
resolution which will submit to the
people the question as to whether or
not q state wide prohibition amend
ment will be inserted in the constitu-
ton. This is progress in the right
direction.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
KANSAS cOlHAENT
WHY IS WALTER FAMOUS?

WHY IS WALTER FAMOUS?
Walter Wellman IS one of the fam
Gus men of his time.
why: Because he once said he
.vtuio ny to the North Pole. He never
DID 1T, but he made some preparations,
"a chicago paper paying the cost and
wrecked three or four balloons.
And ne has been famous ever since.
He is a hero at chautauquas, where
ladies love to hold his hand, and the
yellow editors pay him great sums for
his contributions.
AS a matter of justice, should Wal
ter be famous for saying he intended
flying to the North Pole? Should he
and Frederick the Great, because he
had a big notion he couldn't carry out
II men are to become noted with as
llttls. excuse as this. why should not
YOU announce that you intend to fly
from the earth to Mars, and become
the greatest man in the world:
Most of our present day great men
are of the Walter w Gilman type. There
Is Clifford Pinchot. He is net only fam
ot;s. blu. many believe he is sort Of
Savior.
What has he ever done? All We can
recall is that he secured a political joD'
after years of trying. anc was dis
charged for in1pudepce. True, it was
said OF him that he was a Good Man,
and so much desired the good of the
people that he was willing to give ev-
erv family a wood lot of, 160 acres,
but he never actually gave every fam
lily SO mut'n as a cottonwood switch.
Go on down the list, and you will
find that most of our great men are
Clifford Pinchots and Walter Wellnians.
A really great man like John D.
Rockefeller. who started IS a poor boy.
end amassed the greatest fortune OF
ancient or modern times, is generally
despised by the admirers Of Walter
Welln.an and GincId Pinchot. John D.
Rockefeller controls the one business
concern that actually has the world for
market, but how the lovers of Wal
ter Wellman and Clifford Pinchot hata
old John D.. who has really accom-
'-ished something's The people hate the
truly great man SO cordially that when
his grandchildren are taken out riding
by nursemaids, it is necessary to send
detectives along, to prevent the admir-
ers Of Walter Wellman and Clifford
Pinchot from blowing them UP with
bombs.
By-the-way, here's something new
about your favorite hero, Walter Well
man He SAYS he intends to fly across
the Atlantic in an airship.
But you know about Walter.-Atchi-
son Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

What a relief It will be for all con-
cerned, and for the voters especially,
when wednesday morning arrives. AS
for the voters. they have bad diff
cult time in attending to their ordinary
AFFAIRS Of life because of the naggings
they have been subjected to by the
politicians and off1ceseekers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Professor Dyche, state fish and game
warden, has pointed out another ad-
mirable characteristic Of the German
carp. II you treat 'em kindly they
will eat out of your hand. 1t won't be
Mr. Dyche's fault If the carp do not
become popular in Kansas.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

It's either droutf or a deluge.
Down in Kentucky five weeks of con-
tinuous rains have damaged crops and
property to the extent of $4,000, 900.
Why couldn't some of that rain been
put where it would have been appre-
riofaa1
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

There will be dearth of lies passing
around in Kansas after the primary
campaign closes. It seems certain that
all of them extant have been nailed
down two or three times by each and
every candidate for each and every
office.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

The morality of the people all over
the country seems to be improving all
the time. Pool-selling and bookmak-
ing has Just been prohibited in Salt
Lake City. The Texas legislature is
enacting a law to prohibit the display
of prize light pictures in that state.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Swat the ptomaines. is the slogan at
Joplin, Mo-, tf1se days. And no won
der! More than 100 cases of ptomaine
poisonings has developed there in the
past week
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

A news dispatch from New York
states that the Intercontinental Rub
Der company, the alleged rubber trust.
and In which Senator AIdrich is in
tsrestsd. Is making huge profits now
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

The United States loss will be Eng
l-ad's gain. Jack johnson is soon to
set sail for London.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
FROA OTHER PENS
CHINA TO HER DEsPo1LERs.

CHINA TO HER DESPOILERS.
China'S reply to Russia and Japan
is delicious blend of humility and
imputation. Should the United States
and Germany take it as the basis for
their forthcoming notes to the same
powers, the perfidy of Russia and
Japan shall have been indelibly i'm
pressed upon the world.
Taking her cue from their hypocrit-
ical professions with respect to faith
fully carrying out all their pledges re-
garding Manchuria, China embodies
in her note grouping of all the Man
churian treaties from that signed at
Portsmouth down to the pact made a
shows the hollowness and mockery of
the whole proceeding, together with
the inevitable conviction that diplomacy
is at an end. insofar as it relates to
territorial integrity and the open
door.
China has bowed her head in a spir-
it of resignation born of a sense of
helplessness. 1t is now Great Britain s
turn to exhaust the ingenuity of diplo-
matte phraseology in an effort to
screen her equivocal position toward
the negotiations. Germany and the
United States are not helpless, like
China, but to them the prize is scarce
ly worth struggle, even to the extent
Enthusiastically show their hands,
Washington Post.
o.
BARRING THE EASY MARRIAGE.
New Jersey has taken a forward step
in a reform of the marriage laws of the
state. For years there has been no re-
striction in the matter of marriage
licenses, and the state has been the
haven for those who were barred from
marriage in other states.
By a new law which has just gone
into effect, every applicant for marriage
in the state must have a license Sc
cured from an official register. Each
applicant must endure rigid question:
| ing and q penalty of from one to three
| years Imprisonment is provided for
those giving false answers. Registers,
| justices and clergymen are held under
heavy penalties responsible for the en-
| forcemnt of the law.
The New Jersey reform deserves
warm communication, as being recog-
milton Of the Importance of the mar
! tract in a section of the country where
such recognition is most need--St. Paul
| such recognition is most needed.-St.
Paul Pioneer Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

How did your act take. amateu
night?t Great! When I sang the frs
the next they yelled Tmprisonm enti' 81
6aitlmOre sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Why. do you always jam a thermom,
temperature SO Important" ut saves
listening to a lot of symptoms" Explained
the doctor. briefly.-Louisville Courier.
Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

Farmer Hayrick-Here's where the
feller jumped his board. Farmer Corncrif,
Call It Lovers Leap and char FER II =
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

NATURAL HISTORY (Lesson XVIII
The GUINEA Is freckled bird,
But when drew this biped,
I dropped the spots, because I'd heard
They look much better striped.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01
EDWARD EVERETT HALE.
He Wrote 1.-THE Man
without a Country"
1922. 1863. 1903.
Latest Rubber Joke.

-
Chicago Inter Ocean.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-08-01

,Applicant-Did understand you to say
that you accommodate 200 persons at this
Motel? Hotel Proprfetor-No- I said this
hotel had capacity for 200-Browningss
Magazlne.
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1910-06-29

full rebellion at Beersheba was the
worst that could be charged against
you. Here, at your own home. when
your mother had just been spared to
you by the mercies OF the God whose
commandments you set at naught, you
have been wallowing in SHIN crome!"
IF can sit here and take that from
you. it's because 1T isn't So"
.sWretched boy!. Out of your own
mouth you shtll be convicted. Where
were you on Wednesday morning?"
81 was at home most of the time;
between 10 o'clock and noon 1 was on
the mountain"
There were three of you: hard-S
ened. degraded boy, woman no less
who tempted you"
Nan Bryerson at the spring under the
big rock. don't have to defend my
self! If you can believe I'm that low
down. you're welcome to!" Then. ali
ruptly: 81 reckon we'd better be going
on home; they'll be waiting dinner for
us at the house" NS
He got on his feet with that, but the
accuser was still confronting him, with
the dark eyes glowing and monitory
finger, pointed to .detain him.
Not yet, Thomas Gordon: there Is
a duty laid on me. I had hoped and
prayed that might find you repent
ant; you are not repentant Your faith
er has letter from Doctor Tolllvar;
the doors of Beersheba are open to you
again. had hoped" The pause was
not for effect. 1t was merely that the
man and the kinsman in Silas Crafts
had throttled the righteous judge. st
breaks my heart. Thomas, but l must
say It You have put It out Of your
power to say with the Psalmist, I will
wash mine hands in innocency: SO will
compass thine altar o Lord You
must give up all thoughts of going
back to Beersheba.'
Don't trouble yourself" said Tom.
with more bravado. 81 wouldn't go
back there II It was the only place on
earth, Then suddenly: who was 1t
that told on me, Uncle Silas."
| Never mind about that 1t was one
who could have no object in misstat-
| ing the fact-which you have not de-
MED. Let us 60 homo"
ITO be continued.)
Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1910-06-29

A negro attached to an African hunt.
ing party met with a curious adven-
ture. says an English paper. Wander
ing one day from camp, he surprised
two; lion cubs at play and thoughtless-
ly commenced to amuse them. He was
only too successful. The big cubs gam
boiled fearlessly about him and to his
dismay refused to desist when he
wished to leave them.
Realizing the danger to which he
would be exposed should the mother
appear, he began to run, but the cubs
refused to be shaken off and in their
play scratched his legs in fearful
fashion.
That the creatures were thoroughly
enjoying themselves was evident from
their manifestations of delight, and
before long their unusual cries brought
a lioness leaping to the spot.
Trembling in every limb. the negro
faced the growing animal. while the
cubs continued to jump up at him.
eager for further caresses. IA.e en-
ragged lioness moved round uneasily
in a circle. man and beast keeping
their eyes steadily on each other. Sew
eral times the lloness crouched to
spring. but the man, from fear. never
shifted his gaze.
At length. after what seemed an age,
when the negro was ready to drop
from exhaustion, the animal sud- My
called her subs aWay and disanppe red
into the surrounding scrub.