The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-09-16
AND. SPEAKING OF GALL.


Once on time, $50 reads the add a
man was nearly dead; he had some
trouble with his inner works which
made his wheels go round by jerks.
''soda-water on the BRAIN" and shook-
| worm" "cussedness' and "gout." They
turned the patient inside out and oper-
ated for the chills. then loaded him
with purple pills. At times his tenn
perature they took; likewise his watch
and pocketbook, but still the sufferer
G-ew worse. until his folks engaged q
hearse.
AND THEN
friend who peddled drugs, dropped
in and sold him thirty jugs of Doctor
Dippy's Liver Dope. compound of
prunes and laundry soap). The sick man
took a quart at first, which acted on
his liverwurst, and in an hour his pam
had ceased.-his handspring ran as If
'twere creased.
This party lived to ninety-six, and
when at last he crossed the Styx his
liver stayed alive until the undertaken
had to kill it with a heavy baseball
THAT?
-
AS for the guy who wrote that dope,
| he was suspended with a rope at
twelve O'Clock one frosty night. 1t
His last words were: There still is
hope. Use Doctor Dippy's Liver Dope"
Now, to this fact they point with
pride: they hanged him till his body
died.-then shot and stabbed and burn
ed his GALL, but couldn't kill the
thing at all!
| The Kansas City reporter who was
chewed by the Wichita crooks bulldog,
has secured possession of the brute.
and will keep it for the same reason
that an old soldier keeps the minnie
ball which was whitfield out of hts
neck,-to exhibit when he tells the
story of the encounter. The animal
will be extremely useful for this pur-
pose, as it is generally understood that.
| the said reporter will be unable 20
| exhibit the scars he received in tina
encounter. Fresh photographers kind
| ly keep Off The dog DID bite him in
| the encounter).
| If any local citizen is a sufferer with
| insomnia, he should hasten to see the
eminent insomnia specialist, DIR. Bat
! ting Nelson, who will be in our city a
few days longer Consultation free,l
DR.. Nelson is specialist Of world
wide fame, and carries a pair of the
most effective sleep-producers ever
worn by one Of his weight. Call and
| see the Doctor. Only few days more
in our city, ct cetera, ct cetera-
AS we predicted earlier, ex-Chief
Burt of Wichita failed to convince Dis
trict Attorney Harry Bone that his
valuable services in running down
postoffice robbers, began at a suf-
| ficiently early date.
A KNOCK.
The new management of the state
fair has made some great improve
ments in the arrangement and con-
veniences of the fair grounds. They
have also made a. large mistake. I'm
der the old rule, the fence in front of
the grandstand, was only three feet
from t lower seat. When gang 4
yaps lined up to the exclusion Of the
view of those who had also paid to see
the races, the obstructers were In
duced, by pointed remarks. and the
ends of canes and umbrellas, to break
away. The new management has
moved the fence out to the track,
where the view-hogs are out of the
reach of umbrellas and profanity. We.
herewith submit q sketch Of the excit-
ing finish of the great Kansas Derby
as seen from the grandstand. the
same sketch is an exact likeness d