davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
Why Not Impeaeh Ballingerl

The Richmond Dispatch. a
Democratic newspaper with more than
a modicum OF common sense. offers this
pertinent suggestion:
The wisest way 70 get at the bottom Of
this Ballinger business is for Ollie James
and Madison and the rest Of the peanut
politicians 70 prefer charges Of impeach-
ment against the Secretary Of the Inte-
rior so that the United States Senate
the trial court would be able TO handle
the matter in decent and orderly way"
Why not do this very thing?
Nobody now expects the forthcoming
split verdict Of the Joint committee or
commission Of Congress TO settle any
thing or convince anybody. It will
neither acquit nor convict
The opposition party. very soon to
emerge from the wilderness. apparently.
cannot learn too quickly that no endur-
ing benefit can come from such
stage plays OF small politics as Ollie
James and his confreres succeeded IN
pulling of at St Paul in this Balineer
case The Kentuckian is not appraising
the situation Alright if he think that all
the Democrats have TO do through this
Republican crisis is to play politics.
What they really need to do. what an
awakened public intelligence expects
them to do, is to practice statesman
ship. Any other course VIII mean but
fieeting glimpse Of the promised land.
AS for Ball!nger. we quite agree with
Editor Hemphin. that the only decent
and orderly way out Of the mess is by
impeachment, proceedings.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
The Shame Of Illinois.

\ Senator OF the United States unit to
occupy seat at a banquet given in
honor OF an ex-Presidentl
Thus is the shame OF the sovereign
State Of Illinois advertised 10 the world
The refusal OF Theodore Roosevelt TO
sit at table with William Lorimer. and
his excoriation of the corrupt machine
methods that made possible the election
OF that machine politician TO the Senate.
win aid the cause OF progressive Repub-
licanissn and help the party itself.
The episode concentrates public atten-
ton upon a peculiarly abhorrent and
singulsrly disgraceful chapter in our re-
cent political history involving the out
right purchase Of a Senatorial election
by base legislative compact between Re-
publicans and Democrats
Seats in the United States Senate have
been bought before, but never so openly,
SO shamelessly. as Lorimer secured his
toga; and yet the Republican party of
his state complacentiy accepted him.
continued to homer him. and. in the
grand jury investigation following the
graft exposures, has sought TO protect
him. 1t has not called upon him to re-
sign. not repudiated him. but been con
tent to be represented by such man.
and thus not only brought reproach upon
the State. but the nation as we'll
Roosevelt has sat at feast with men as
corrupt as Lorimer. He has fraterniZed
with them and used them to further his
political ends. AT this Chicago banquet.
doubtless many men were seated no bet
ter than Billy Lorimer-politicians OF
guilty knowledge before the act, II not
direct participants in the Ubiquitous buy
ing OF votes
But whatever his past relations with
I conscienceless machine politicians OF the
Lorimer type. and apart from the wholly
personal aspect Of the episode. which IS
open to criticism, Roosevelt has rendered
a fine service in presenting Illinois shame
as an object lesson Of the results OF po-
itlcsl depravty.
II insurgency mean an end to such a
STATE Of things. well may the country
welcome the spread OF the movement.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
saw LINCOLN SHOT.

From the Brooklyn Life.
Mai. Henry Reid Rathbone was in the
theater box when Booth shot Lincoln.
He tried 20 arrest the assassin, who
stabbed him in the arm. Maj. Rathbone
was transferred 70 the consular service
and kept there Long years ago, While
consul at Hanover Germany. he devel-
oped insanity. and killed his wife. He
was acquitted. but was declared to De In
sane. and was committed 70 an asylum
there in which he has since remained
Though II has often been claimed and
shown that he has apparently recovered
his reason, the government has refused
TO give him up. because a return Of his
malady could not. in the nature Of things
be absolutely disproved He is dying to-
day. and the conclusion. though harsh.
is Just that Germany has done well 70
protect him and others from what were
his Liabilities. His case seems 10 be a
duplicate Of that OF II. K. Thaw.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

From the Montgomery Advertiser
II there's any greater swindle tina
that which the pencilmakers perpetr~ te
upon a helpless public, we do not recall
It now, unless it be that OF the ioI
tain pen factories or sockmakers. One
buys a box OF soft No. 1 pencils
and perhaps out Of the lot Of one dozen
he can find one pencil with a lead solid
enough to withstand the gentle trims OF
the pocket knife.
AS a rule the writing "peth is too
brittle il it's soft and falls away in crumbs
while If the lead is hard it will not write
or course no one ever saw a fountain
pen or a pair Of socks worth the price;
no matter how small the latter may be,
Such frauds are enough to make one
take the name Of Teddy in vain
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
WE HEAR

That Charley Langley is too busy
even 10 think Of baseball. much less
ply il.
That James L. Parsons is making
a big hole in the United States
Treasury vaults.
That John McGreSor win shortly
build a home fer Washington ad-
mirers Of the Scotch.
That Doc Lew Wilson is spending
his hard-earned cash on the merry
go-rounds at Atlantic City.
That Andy Kelley thinks Chicago
is a small town when It comes TO
measuring paradable streets
That W. H. McCray is fully con-
virced that II is no cinch to build
Masonic temple in Brookland.
That DIR. ]. 3. Nichols gives the
sights of Atlantic City" as his
reason fer wearing stained glasses
That Peter Organ win 90 to a
hcme-ccmirg IN ireland when aero
Planes become carriers Of daily use.
That John Exner Will have 10
work overtime To fill the hoe in
his bark roll caused by his summer
vacation.
That Chris Glenn ana Gus Cook
are wishing for Congress TO OXEN. 50
that they can SO down and take
life easy.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
e GAELXzse-c&
BOOK REVIEW
THE BOURGEOIS"

bohemian Paris is, II seems. an mex
haustible treasury for the Anglo-Ameri-
can romancer. An established cant OF
the Latin quarter has come into being.
and certain properties. human and 9TH
er. are recognized as eligible for the
kind Of fiction in question Fortunately
the present story teller does not con-
duct Us through the worn paths Of stu
dent-grisette-artist literature. The hero
is an American medical student; but he
is original in being a minor character OF
the tale: the stars are Frenchmcn. an
amusing group. OF whom the central
figure Is one Prison This Frlsson Is
an ex-medicai student who aspires 20 be
4 playwright. and makes d living for
himself and a strange parasite by mis-
cellaneOus hack work The hanger-on.
Carabin. is a man OF fifty or sixty. for
many years an unsuccessful candidate
for a medical degree. and a gross ras-
cal by actual profession His only use
fulness lies in his ability 70 find work
for Prison 10 GO. To this pair comes
the Young American. Peter A.abaster;
NO the omnipotent gamin Of the famiI-
lar type, but sn unSophisticatei youth
with no vices. who finds himself much
al sea IN his strange surroundings. Tn
der the tutelage OF the Frfsson-Csrabin
group. and Of a certain Young woman.
his education rapidly advances He has
a narrow escape from becoming a party
in such matrimonial fiasco as his faith
er has warned him against. The real
interest and merit Of the book lie in
the picture OF the group CT down-at-
heels Parisians, and particularly OF
Frisson. an engaging and even heroic
figure N his way CNew York; Bren-
tano's).
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
Let There Be Light.

washington IS an iu-ughted city. A few
prominent thoroughfares are adequately
Illuminated. but. as a whole. the city
may truthfully be said 70 be enveloped
in gloom after nightfan.
Il is the universal comment Of visitors
acquainted with well-Hghted cities that
this Capital is poorly lighted. once out
Of the glare Of the Union Station, the
stranger finds only Pennsylvania avenue
and a few favored streets properly light
ed; The rest Of the city dark and its beauty
hidden. Residents have become so accus-
toned 70 this state OF things that TO them
the gloom is not so marked; but they are
conscious OF the fact, nevertheless.
It IS the system of lighting that is at
fault. obviously. and the observant citi-
zen has noted with pride and commenda-
ton a tendency toward improving the
system to the extent that Congress has
been willing TO provide the means. Six
teenth street now beautifully lighted. as
belts the main thoroughfare leading
A bA- tllt W 4lAe L1ouSet emphasizes TIE
inadequate lighting OF other residen-
tial streets. and illustrates the point here
made touching the poor lighting Of the
city as q whole
In view Of all this. we readily under
stand and applaud the disposition OF the
uthorities-somewhat tardily manifest.
ed-to have the city lighted as it should
be lighted. They would not be alert to
their obligation to TIE community II they
did not see the need Of a decided i'm
provement.
But the urgency Is not so great OF
pressing as TO warrant better lighting OF
the city at the expense Of the suburbs
Such a policy is unwarranted and in
expedient from any point Of view The
suburban citizens have presented their
case unanswerably.
The order recently issued. and against
which there is a just outcry. may wei
be revoked promptly. Then let the Com
missioners bend their energies for relief
before Congress. Surely that body can be
made to see, IL II does not know already,
what is needed.
Washington, so nl-lighted, should be
the best lighted of all American cities
its suburbs included
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
The Fisheries Decision

There Is no use trying to deceive our
selves with the belief that We won at
The Hague in the Newfoundland fish,
cries case simply because the arbitration
court decided FIVE points in our favor as
against two for Great Britain. The five
points we won were inconsequential: the
two We lost were vital, and went to the
very heart Of the dispute. The court de-
cided that American fishermen have the
right to hire alien help. which means
Newfoundland help; that they do not have
TO make entry or report at custom
houses. and are not subject TO the pay
ment Of light or harbor dues under GER
tain circumstances.
On the other hand, the United States
claimed that when laws or ordinances
were made by Great Britain, Canada. or
Newfoundland in regard TO the fisheries,
such regulations should be submitted 20
US for approval This was rather an ex-
travagant claim. and no one expected IL
would be allowed. There is. then. cause
for qualification in the fact that the ar
bitration court has decided that such laws
and regulations shall be submitted TO a
'disinterested commission" composed Of
three members. one selected by each party
TO the dispute. the third member to be
DR.. Paulus Hook. the scientific fisheries
adviser Of the Netherlands. SO that IS
settled.
The most important question related to
the ''three-mile limit" American fisher
men have been excluded from fishing
within three miles Of the Newfoundland
shore. We claimed that this three-mTle
limit should follow the windings Of the
coast, and thus admit American fisher
men into certain bays that are more than
six miles wide The British claim was
that the three-mile limit extended IN a
continuous line between the headlands
II was on this point that the greatest ar
gument was had. and it is reported that
Senator Roots speech on the subject was
mastery. even II it did prove ineffective
For on this point the court ruled against
the United States. and American fisher
men are. therefore. barred from the fine
fishing bays Of Newfoundland The case
is the more important. as it serves to set
a precedent for the future. Similar ques-
tions were brought up in determining the
boundary Of Alaska. and again in the
Northeastern boundary dispute. It is prob
able that the present decision will settle
the matter for all time. and this is likely
to be Of immense Importance in case OF
war.
But though we have lost on the most
important points, We believe that all
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
ANSWERS TO QUERIES.

Madge-No. dear; a turban is not
becoming with the hobble skirt.
You should wear a big hat and a
veil II possible. TO hide your
bushes while you hobble.
Clarendon-Yes. We think Il looks
real manly to have your monogram
printed on your cigarettes
Augist-It is spelled L I A r
Il was originally term q re-
prosch hurled AZ his detTsctoS by
Julius Caesar.
Populi-No; it was not Mr.. Bal
linger who set the date as Septem-
Der Is
IuQuircr-No: VIC don't know what
The Outlook gets out Of Il. A line
addressed 10 Mr.. Lyman Abbott
might bring you the desired in
formation.
Ralph Lett is because he IS 50
! etcrnally happy that Col W. B.
Hibbs holds his age so well.
Steck-Yos; a bank check made
out in lead pencil is perfectly good
sometimes
TOuriSt-No; the only scion Of
ROYALTY We have had with Us re-
Gently was R. V. Oulahan. a de-
scendant Of the Irish kings.
InquisitiVe-We must decline 70
say how much money Col. joyce
makes by his poetry.
Wrestler-We think that Mr..
Roosevelt was the only President
who ever acquired the art OF jiu
jitsu We are quite sure that
neither George Washington nor Lin
coin studied il.
Anxious-No: VIC DO not know the
rest Of the verse beginning Il called
man a liar and he punched me
in the eye. Can any Of our
readers supply it,
CheInist-We do not know the
component parts Of milk. but from
I what the scientists say we should
think Il was made up Of hookworm
germs typhoid bacteria. the baciIi
Of tuberculosis. a modicum Of water
and some-milk
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
THE PERFECT POEM.

Into the perfect pocm three things go
The poct's heart. the lOrc Of woman God
These with their light ard might and fiery glow
Transform TO singing what were else a clod.
Scc hcW She rurs across the graEs ynn Firlt
Seaying and swinging. hly-sail and sweet,
WHIST joyful cadence IN the wind-blcvn Curl
What Ginning rhyming in the dew-shcd sec;l
The balanced arms are ctrOrhCs. and the knees
Bend ike supple cDupiet smooth and strong
The Niic!e Hitting lyric Who looks eecs
Aiy perfect dRughtcr. hears nv persect song.
Pail Mall Gazette.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

interesting paper with the hope that
by assiduouSly devoting themselves
10 cod fishing the Virginia farmer
might considerably amehoTate the
high cost Of living.
A rising vote Of thanks was
awarded to the intrepid fisherman
on motion Of Col. r. y. Harper
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
PIncerriIIe,. Pears.

From the Portland Oresonian.
The secret Of the wonderful pears which
are produced in the Frey orchard near
Placervile has at last been discovered.
The ground is peppered with gold mug
gets. No doubt orehardists whose trees
have been barren will profit by this in
formation. They need only SOW few
bushels Of gold nuggets TO the acre and
their next crop q fruit will be satsfac-
tory. We anticipate great popularity for
this novel method OF fertilization.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
NOTHING DIFFERENT.

Same old speeches, same old b6oms;
Same old tiresome hunt for rooms.
Same old weeds that bend and nod;
Same old pesky goldenrod-
Same old oysters, same old quail;
Same old bills by every mail.
Same old freckles. same old tan;
Same old padded moving van.
Same old astersl in the mall:
Same old cider. same old fall.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

From the birmingham Age- Herald.
do you see that fellow over there
yelling Kill the umpire, Cut his heart
out. and the bloody robber?'"
"Of course, see him. and hear him.
too"
well, he's one Of the worst henpecked
men in town. He comes out here every
afternoon 10 let OF steam"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

From Illustrated BitS
Violet never had such a streak OF
luck. lie fell in love in Paris, proposed
in Rome, and bought the ring in Naples
Pierrot-Dld your luck end there?
Violet-Oh. no. While We were at
Monte Carlo he won enough from papa
for us to get married on.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
THE FAIR MAIDS HAT.

Oh, girly girls. my fancy whirls.
There are no girls like you.
With big straw hats, straight
twisted hats
And hats the COWS would chew.
Some hats that hide the charms SC
sweet.
Some hats that are measured b
the feet:
More hats whose price makes papa
yell.
Some hats whose shape is hard e
tell.
But in the evening. best Of all.
The pretty girls wear DO hats al
all.
MAI. STOFER.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
COLONEL TO LoRIMER.

/ have eaten with savages rimy
and black
Far OF on mid-Africa's plains
And Just for a bunch ! had Booker
TO lunch
And the colored vote showed
wondrous gains.
: have eaten with Spaniards ana
Rough Riding men.
With stokers and shovelers, too
But I'm hanged II I'm able to sit
AZ the table
With a man who's as crooked as
you.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

When the British commander saw the
accomplishment Of the swarthy American
he seemed TO nave lost his desire 10 fight
and wheeled about and fed westward. Il
took Perry a month to and him. finally
locating him at Put-in-Bay. IN the battle
that followed the British lost double the
number Of the Americans, and for the
first time in all history an entire English
squadron surrendered. And. best Of ALL
the victory was won by a hOtilla Of rick
ETY. rough. small craft. manned largely
by farm boys and foresters. and led by
a man only twenty-seven years old
Perry sent his famous message 10 Har-
rison, scrubbed In pencil on the back OF
an old letter. and using his stiff naval
cap for a desk
When Perry shifted his command from
the Lawrence to the Niagara he did so
amid storm Of shot. grape, canister.
and musket balls The British directed
all their available fire on the little boat
One shot shattered an oar. another went
through the boat. but Perry coolly took
of his uniform coat and stuffed 1t in the
hole 70 keep the boat ahoat.
A line in an old song goes:
dc pulled Of his coat and be plugged up his boat
Ard aVay be went sailing in Gre aud smoke
BY effecting the capture OF this entire
British squadron Perry became famous
in day.
On September 10 John Smith was elected
president Of Virginia in l60s; the Area
dians were exiled from Nova Scotia in
1855; Elias Howe received a patent for
the first completed sewing machine in
1876; the fugitive slave bill was passed in
1850, and the statue Of Commodore Perry
was unveiled in Cleveland in 1850. To-day
is the birthday OF Nicholas Biddle the
naval officer d75O; John J. Crlttenden.
United States Attorney General and gov
ernor Of Kentucky Q7S0; Sarah Wallis
Lee. English writer and artist Q79D;
Judge Noah Davis OSlS; Joseph Wheeler.
Southern soldier and statesman (lS36)l
John Brisben Walker. editor and author
QS4O. and Poultney BigeIow. author
QS55). 1t is the date OF the death OF
william the Conqueror QOS0; Henrietta
Maria 1883. and DR.. Thomas Sheridan.
the Irish scholar G739.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Three thousand Americans are strand
ed in London"
Terrible! We must raise a fund"
1t isn't lack OF money. The fact is
that all palace staterooms are engaged
six weeks ahead"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

The New York police have captured
vessel loaded with guns and ammunition,
and they cannot imagine where 1t was
bound Probably ordered by Uncle Joe. p"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
Saves His Breath.

I've struck a travelling Job that suits
me at last"
What iine?"
and let Il do the talking"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
Careful Dad.

Il wouldn't like to catch a daughter OF
mine smoking cigarettes"
Neither would l. When I smell Gig
arctic smoke about the house look the
other way"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

ION this trip I have made no partisan
political speeches.. says the colonel. OF
course not: any ole can see that.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Why is it that the college boy with the
biggest feet always has his trousers roll
ed up the highest?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Everybody likes to work in Charles
ton" says the News and Courier Yes
while you are busy working you may. per-
chance. forget that you are in Charleston.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

1t seems rather paradoxical to say that
the increased use OF the auto will keep
boys on the farm.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

A Seattle man Is seeking divorce be-
cause his wife eats seven pounds Of meat
a day. No wonder!
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

We wish the newspapers would quit
wondering, audibly, what has become OF
Chancellor Day. Let him rest.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

The Standard oil Company must In
deed. be rich If it can afford 10 keep a
red-haired siren and Ebert Hubbard botn
on rs nay roll
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

This fellow says he was a friend Of
yours when you were poor"
He was a marvellous actor then. I
never suspected It."
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

The new IS notes are TO be just one
third the present size. In accordance
with the reduction in their purchasing
power, We suppose
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
NO "FLARE.BACKS.'

Weather Prophet Moore has put
his experience to the test. He has
the finest farm near Rockville. he
is insured against flare backs"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Mr. Roosevelts idea about an elastic
Constitution" ought to give some satisfac-
tin to the rubber trust.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10
A Little Ahead.

Are we keeping abreast of the times?''
"Oh, yes; the 1911 models in automobiles
are on the market and the Christmas
magazines will be out next week"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Seeing how many alleged statesmen are
up in the air these days. it was wisdom
on the part of President Taft to decline
an airship ride.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

It IS a little difficult 10 determine
whether it is better 10 be a contributing
editor or TO have a contributing maya
zine
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

In the good roads movement the colonel
stands so squarely in the middle there is
no room for any one else to get by.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

One Of the best things we know about
the automobile is that it has done much
to abolish the high hat.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

kansas farmer waters his erops from
an seroplane." And yet they say that
Kansas newspaper men have no Imagin-
alton
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

Reginald Vanderbilt i'll from overwork.
Oh, piffie,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-09-10

The parents Of that 25O-pound girl who
eloped the other day will have an awful
lot 10 forgive