Virginia citizen. (Irvington, Va.) 1891-1921, 1910-09-09
he LOST THE RACE
Mark Twain's Futile Chase After
a Tallyho Coach.
MISSED A BIG CELEBRATION

The Way the Famous humorist Ir
Company With w. D. HoweIls Did
Not Attend the Centennial Of the
Battle Of tho Minutennen at Concord
In his "reminiscences of Mark Twain
In Hurpcr's Magazine W. ID. TIowells
tells amuslnSly OF the time when he
and Mr.. Clemens missed the anniver-
| sary of the battle of Concord:
MARK Twain came on to Cambridge
in April. 1879. TO so with me 10 the
centennial ceremonies at Concord in
celebration OF the battle of the minute
| men with the British troops a hundred
years before We both had special I'm
vitations. including passage from Bos.
ton. but | said why bother To 20 to
Boston when we could just as well
| take the train for Concord at the Cam
bridge station. He equally decided
that it would be absurd. SO we break
tasted deliberately and then walked TO
the station. reasoning of many things.
as usual.
when the train stopped we found
it packed inside and out People stood
dense Oh the platforms Of the cars.
To our startled eyes they seemed to
project from the windows. and unless
memory betrays me they Law strewn
upon the roofs like brakemen slain nj
the post of duty. We rcmounted the
fame worn steps of Porter's station
and began exploring North Cambridge
Tor some means of transportation over
land to Concord. for we were that far
on the road by which the British went
and came on the day of the battle
The liverymen whom we appealed TO
received us. some with commission
some with derision. but in either mood
convinced us that we could not have
hired cat 70 attempt our conveyance
much less horse or vehicle of any
description
III was raw. windy day. very un-
like the exceptionally hot April day
when the routed redcoats, pursued by
the ColOnials, fied painting back to Bos-
ton. with their tongues hanging out
like dogs but we could not take due
comfort in the vision of their discom-
future. We could almost envy them.
for they had AT least got to Concord
A swift procession Of coaches, car
riages and buggies. all going TO Con
cord. passed us, inert and helpless. on
the sidewalk I'm the peculiarly cold
mud OF North Cambridge. We began
TO wonder IL we might not stop one OF
them and bride IL to take us.
81 felt keenly the shame of defeat
and the guilt of responsibility for our
failure. aud when a gay party OF stu
dents came toward us on the top of a
tallyho. luxuriantly empty inside. we
felt that our chance had come and our
last chance. lie said that IL l would
stop them and tell them who | was
they would gladly, perhaps proudly.
give us passage. l commended that IL
with bis far vaster renown he would
approach them our success would be
assured.
While we stood. lost In this contest
of civilities.' the coach passed us. with
gay notes blown from the horns OF the
students. and then Clemens started I'm
pursuit. encouraged with shouts from
the merry party. who could not, i'm
agine who was trying TO run them
down. TO rivalry OF speed. The un.
equal match could end only In one
way. and | am glad cannot recall
what he said when he came back to
me. Since then 1 have often wondered
at the grief which would have wrung
those blithe young hearts II they could
have known that they might have had
the company OF Mark Twain to Con
cord that day and did not.
I'VE hung about unavailingly In the
bitter wind awhile longer and then
slowly. very slowly. made our way
home. We wished to pass as much |
time as possible In order to give prob. |
ability TO the deceit we intended to |
practice. for we could not bear TO own |
ourselves bafiled in our boosted wis. |
dom OF taking the train at Porter's |
station and had agreed to say that we |
had been to Concord and got back
Even after coming home to my house
we felt thar our statement would be
wanting I'm verisImilitude without fur
Their delay. and We erept quietly into
my library and made up roaring FIRE
on the hearth and thawed ourselves
out In the heat of IL before we regained |
our courage for the undertaking. With
all these precautions we failed. for
when our statement was impaired to
the proposed victim she a'stantly pro-
nounced 1t unreliable. and we were left
with 1t on our hands Intact. think
the bumor OF this situation was finally
a greater pleasure to Clemens than an
actual visit TO Concord would have
been. Only a few weeks before his
death he laughed our defeat over with
one Of my family in Bermuda and ex
ulted In our prompt detection"