Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1910-07-22

Scott" said he to himself. What was
their original size?"
Prue-Do you think he was sincere
when he said he loved you? Dolly
I'm sure of it. He looked too foolish
to be making believe.
Mrs. Knicker-Do you let Bridget
eat with the family? Mrs Booker
Yes; it's much cheaper than to have
her eat with the policeman-Puck.
That clerk of yours seems to be a
hard worker" YES that's his spe-
cialty." What, working?" No
seeming o."-Philadelphia Ledger.
She'll never have another photo
graph taken. He-Why not? She
If it looks like me don't like it, and
If it flatters me my friends don't like
it.
And is your milk pasteurized?"
asks the prospective customer Of the
dairyman. Sure" he replies. my
boys pasturize the cows every morn
ing"
Jones made an awful big hit at
the banquet the other night" rs that
so? Yes; he was called on for a
speech and refused. Detroit Free
Press.
Him-You're the only girl 1 ever
loved! Her-That's interesting but
immaterial. What want to know is,
am I the only girl you're ever going
to love?
"Wilt fly with me??" asked the ar
dent swain. "All depends" answered
the practical girl. "Is that a pro
posal, or merely an invitation to 20
aviating!"
Madge-Edith is surely not going to
marry that living skeleton Of a man.
He's nothing but skin mad bones. Tess
Why not? He'll make her a rafting
husband.-Boston Transcript.
The young man who called on me
last night says there is fool in every
family" "Was he trying to advance
that as a reason why we should take
him into ours?"-Houston Post.
Nov, then, children" said the
teacher, what Is 1t we want most in
this world to make VS. perfectly hap
py" THE things we amt got!" shout
ed the bright boy in the back seat
st. Louis News.
i wish I were an ostrich" said
Hicks. angrily. as he tried to eat one
of his wife's biscuits but couldn't. II
wish you were," returned Mrs. Hicks;
I'D get a few feathers for my hat"
Musical Courier.
These ere flying machines and
wireless telegrams-wonderful afn't
It, Mixer" "'Tis that. All, Tim, afore
we're old men we shall be able to
travel round the world without leavin'
'ome."-The Sketch.
do you believe in the Darwinian
theory?" II am inclined to 60 further
than Darwin did," answered Miss
Cayenne, "and believe that some mem.
bers of our species have started on
a return trip."-Washington Star.
AAo"i'e ~ loOh luc suuFaSette pa
rade three hours to pass given point.
Jewett-Were there many women in
line? Hewitt-Not 30 very many, but
they had to halt every time they ap-
preached dry goods store.-Chicago
News.
Ethel (confldentially) DO you
know, Clara, that | had two Offers of
marriage last week? Clara with en-.
thusiasm)-Oh, am delighted, dear!
Then the report is really true that
your uncle left you his money?-Pick.
Me-Up.
II am dissatisfied with your account
of my discovery" declared the scien-
tist. II told you that 1t would be i'm.
possible to exaggerate the Importance
of this discovery" "Well?" said the
reporter. "You didn't try."-Louis
Vile Courier-J Journal.
You can't run newspaper that
will absolutely please everybody" said
the editor. NO." replied the old sub
scriber; "a mans opinion Of the fash.
ion page is usually pretty much the
same as his wife's opinion Of the
sporting section" Washington Star.
Rory" said the minister, II hear
ye were at Dunlop's kirk on Sunday
last Not that I object, ye ken, but
ye widna yersel like yer ain sheep
strayin' away into strange pastures"
Il widna care. sir" said Rory, '1f 1t
was better grass. Boston Transcript.
I'm afraid my husband is develop
ing the gambling instinct" sobbed the
bride. Whats the matter, dear? Has
he been playing pokerf" mo, but yes.
terday he offered to match pennies
with brother Frank to determine which
one should pay the car e."-Detroit
Free Press.
saylor-van Janter's big apartment
house burned this morning and thu
tenants would hardly permit them.