Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1910-04-15


Mrs. Tellit-Yes. she is a decided
| blonde. Mrs. Knockit-Indeed. When
lid she Milwaukee News.
i Little boy, haven't l seen you in
my Bible class?" Not unless | walks
in me sleep, lady. New Orleans Pic
ayune
| Ella Bella married an octogenariau.
Stella-l don't think that girl ought
to change her religion for a man.
| Chicago Daily News.
What selection is that the orchestra
has Just finished?" II don't know.
Sounded to me like neuralgia express
| ed in music. "-Tit-Bits
/ Daughter-D Did you have to fish
much, mamma, before you caught
papa? Mother--Fish. my dear, fish!
was bear hunting M. A. P.
How much does 1t cost to get mar
ried?" asked the eager youth. That
| depends entirely on how long you live"
replied tho sad-loooking man.
How is the water in the bath. Ii
setter" Cold, my lady. 1t turned
baby fairly blue" Then don't put
Fido in for an hour or so."-Pittsburg
| Post
He-Why are you so sad, darling?
She--I was just thinking. dearest. that
this is the last evening we can be to
gether till tomorrow Chicago Daily
| News.
Splendid color. isn't it?" asked the
| hshmonger, cutting open salmon.
Yes" replied the purchaser. looks
I as IL II were blushing at the price you
ask for It"
Wiggs-How do you know he's a for
eigner? He has no accent? Wages
No. but he knows so many ways in
which this country could be improved.
Philadelphia Record.
What did the poet mean when he
called his country the land of the free
and tho home of the braye?" "He was
probably referring to bachelors and
married men," said old Mr.. Smithers.
sadly.
What do you suppose, Algernon,
the young thing asked, is the reason
the ocean Is salty" u am sure ! don't
know" drawled Algy, unless 1t is be-
cause there are 50 many goldfish in IT,
Success Magazine.
The Manager--Ive got a new idea
for melodrama that ought to make
hit The Wrlter-What Is 1t? The
Manager Tho Idea is to introduce
cyclone into the first act that will kill
all the actors. Tit-Bits.
i've got TO go to Philadelphia said
the hurried traveller, who was fumbling
for his pocketbook Well answered
the New York ticket-seller. ARE you
buying transportation or just telling
your troubles?"-W Washington Star.
Bowers-I understand that the doe
tors have just had a consultation "n
Murphy What conclusion did they
come to? Powers They decided that
the patient was not wealthy enough to
stand an operation Spokane Review.
Ebeneezer-T skeeters makes me
think of them city visitors we had the
week before last His Wife--How's
! that. Eb? Ebenoezer-They come pref.
ty near bein' the worst singers and the
biggest eaters ! ever illustrated
| Bits
Gladys Oh. mammal Here's a note
| from that long haired pianist. He says
| II win be impossible for him to play
at our reception tonight Mamma
What's the trouble? Gladys Some
one stole his wig Chicago Daily
| News
! The Kind Lady You clear off or I'll
set the dog at you. The Tramp-Ah,
| 'ow deceptive Is 'uman natur Fer two
nights I've slept in yer barn, eaten Of
yer poultry an drunk of yer cider, and
now yer treats me as an utter stran.
| ger-The Sketch
They tell me" said the innocent
maid. that your marriage was the re-
suit of love at first sight. Is It true?"
1T is answered the round-shouldered
man, sadly. Had ! been gifted with
second sight I'd still be in the bachelor
class, - Chicago Record Herald.
i hope you will be interested in
yOndcr gentleman" said the hostess.
II have assigned him to take you out
lady addressed That gentleman was
formerly my husband, and he's behind
with his alimony. ~ Louisville Cour-
icr-Juurnal.
Magistrate-Of Officer what is this man
charged with Constable--He's a cam
era ficnd of the worst kind, yer wor-
ship. Magistrate-Bu this man
shouldn't have been arrested simply be-
Gauge he has mania for taking pic.
lures ConstableIt isn't that yer
worship; he takes the cameras.-Bos-
ton Globe.
THAT is a fat, prosperOus-looking an
velOpe Does our salesman send in
big bunch Of Orders?" Not exactly.
That envelope contains a receipt ror
his last check, his expense account for
this week, request for a salary raise,
and a requisition for some more ex-