davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
A STANDING Joke.

Trains were always slow and far be
tween on the branch road Nobody
knew this better than the people mt the
junction, except perhaps those on the
branch itself. 1t was an old story tC
them, and the jokes about the situa
ton We're many and good. One day
the newSdealer mt the junction sta
tiOn came home to lunch grinning
broadly to himself.
WHAT'S the ioke?" asked his wife.
you look pretty well pleased with
yourself"
"Oh. nothing particular" he replied,
excepting an odd fellow from the end
of the line said funny thing.
He'd missed his train, and there
wasn't another for two hours. He
came to the counter to buy some read
ing matter. He asked for a joke book,
and | said | didn't keep them. Then
he paved over the stock and finally
said We'll. guess I'll take time ia
BILE instead b"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
Tho Earth and Man.

A II lie sun. a little rain.
A soft wind blowing from the west.
And woods and fields are sweet again
And warmth within the mountain
breast.
So simple is the earth we tread.
So quick with love and life her fame.
Ten thousand years have dawned and fled
And still her magic is the same.
A little love. a little trust,
A soft impulse, sudden dream,
And life as dry as desert dust
Is fresher than mountain stream.
So simple is the heart of man,
So ready for new hope and joy,
Ten thousand years since 1t began
Have left It younger than boy.
-StopfOrd A. Brooke.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
A Stomach on a Holiday.

a Chicago wine merchant went on
a yachting trip with judge from the
same city. They were out together
for two weeks aud had a good time.
When they returned the agent was
much upset to find himself summoned
on Il jury, but cheered up when he
discovered the judge on the bench was
his late yachting companion. He hur-
ried to the court and pleaded business
pressure as reason for an excuse for
him
What is your buSiness?" the judge
inquired of him Coldly.
Il represent wine in Chicago"
Selling it or drinking it,
We'll, drinking it largely
step into the box. sir A ten days
rest will do you good"
The wine agent served.-Saturday
Evening Post.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02


buckets of water
had been poured
laboriously in t o
the bathtub when
on his next trip
b e foun d her
waiting at t h e
clstern. She was
laughing so hard
il WAS with some
d ! f fic ulty she
managed finally
TO tell the hard
working II u b b Y
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

The Society For +hP Prevention OF
Cruelty to the Engnsh Language could
not invent more cruel punishment
for offenders than TO rompe them to
read and write their own product.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

what the matter SHE WAS LAUGHING.
WAS. 1t had just occurred to her that
the water pipes had not yet been dis
connected and the faucet in the tub
might just as well have been turned
on.
Hubby never said word. He only
turned red, put ON his hat and coat
and went downtown. Kansas City
Star.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

The laska-YukonTacific exposition
evolved striking exhibit right on the
ground-that Is. box office record
Of profit the first month.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
The Forest Wealth of the South.

The Forest Wealth of the South.
About ~ per cent Of the total forest
area Of the country Is located i'm four
teen southern states, which. however,
contain only % per cent of the ma
tiona area, says recent bulletin of
the forestry service This forest area
Is divided among states as follows
Alabama. 20.0OO0OO acres: Arkansas,
a. 200. 600; Florida, 2O.0OO.00O: Georgia,
R2, 100000; Kentucky, 10.OO000O: Lou
slana. lG,5OoO0O; Maryland, 100000;
Mississippi, 100000; North Carolina,
9.60O0O0; South Carolina, 12.O0O,OOO:
Tennessee. 100000; Texas, 100000
poo; Virginia. l4,OOO,OOO, and West
Virginia, 100000
The Importance OF forest conserya-
tlon 10 southern commercial interests
has OF late been clearly set before the
people of the region. Forest preserva-
tlon. with its accompanying protec-
lion of watersheds. power streams and
Woodworking industries. is perhaps
the most pressing conservation work
Of the present day In the south. Pres
ervation of the watersheds will insure
and water power and at the
same time protect the extensive and
ever growing industries which depend
upon local tlmbered areas for raw ma
terial
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

The spectacle of DR.. Jameson. who
raided the Boer capital years ago, and
General Bothu, who once would have
thought 1t u religious duty to hang
Jameson for treason. sitting together
In the kings prlvy council, must glad
den the apostles of peace, notwith-
standing that the present peace In
South Africa was gained by fighting.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

The recent Spanish uprising recalls
the fact that about forty years ago
Spain had short lived republic. The
tendency of that country to go back
ward will yet win it the name of the
cru Wish in the International millpond.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

An assistant bank cashier recently
ran away with about 100000 OF the
banks money and left note saying
that he had gone forever and had TAX
en- enough money to pay his ex-
penses." That bank VIII probably
have a prejudice In future against ad-
vanclng expense money.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

with railroads that fight the two
cent rate declaring heavy dividends 1t
II plain thar the lamp of faith In the
corporation lawyer still burns ar head
quarters
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

When the suffrage ladies asked Wall
bears" broke forth In catcalls. thus
exposing another mOnstrous nature
fake
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

II we were still In the days of the
pony express. the Pacific states might
all have seeded before Washington
learned what was going on.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

VIII be shut of a
couple Of days.
Wen need some
up in the bath
70 o IN. Il IN d |
thought you could
carry up a few
bucketfuls fro IN
the clstern and
fill the tub"
"All right" he
replied. He had
found the b e $ t
W ay to h a V e
p e a c e at home
w a S always to
agree with h $
wife
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

Story OF 500 diamond In a ten
cent dish of ice cream suggests that
Ice cream men also know thing or
two about advertising.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

Adam Steinbower was sent to the
store for quarters worth of break
last bacon. He paid the clerk with
dollar and pocketed the change.
When he reached home his wife ask.
ed him for the meat. He couldn't
find nothing but the change A
few days later he found the meat
in his pocketbook. This story re-
calls that of a man who ordered a
quarters worth OF beer delivered.
III tLefe is 10 one at home" he
told the butcher, Just push it
through the keyhole.
According to the big negro porter.
of the Idaho Northern trai
Emmett is the hardest station along
the whole line in which to get trains
out on time He says" Folks heah
Is de most peculiar yo' evan saw.
Hit takes 'em foar minutes a head ttI
kiss good-by. en- dey's generahally
5evahal head. We's argotter wait
Lwell dey gifts done. Same way
yittin' off de keahs. Meah kissin'
81 noah pesterin. en- noah foolishin
sroun' in Emmett den ennywheres
u de worl' Yeh jest naturally |
saint hey no trains on time"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

Lucky sometimes for some people II
"three minutes TO Broadway" means
nothing worse than three hours get
ting back.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

Simplitied spelling should appeal TO
Ing 10 bear arms. but not armies.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

Ii must make these mo hi" preach
ers feel ridiculous to have the other
fellows promptly raise to do that
beats It.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

You get the buckets, WHEY, and I'll
get busy right away" he told her.
She found n couple of pals. and he
started to work. \ dozen or more
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
Tales of the Town
The MARCH OF MEN.

IF you could east away the pain,
The sorrows and the tears
And let the Joys alone remain
From all departed years.
IL you could quite forget the signs
And recollect the song
What think you? Would you be as wise
As helpful or as strong2
-TF you could lay the burden down
That bows your head at whites.
Shun everything that wears a frown
And live life OF smiles
BE happy as child again.
As free from thoughts OF care
Would YOU appear to other men
More noble or more fair?
A II, no! a man should do his part
a And carry all his load
RejuiCed TO share with every heart
The roughness OF the road.
Not given to thinking overmuch
OF pains and griefs behind.
But glad to be In fullest touch
With all his humankind.
Charles Buxton Going.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02
The - -
Scrap Book
It Made His wifi. Laugh.

'N "NU" TVS wiz INuyH'
At breakfast she said:
"Dearie. you know the plumbers are
coming this morning and the water
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1910-06-02

THE comet" remarked Bill Mis-
glvens the other day" was herald
ed as brilliant spectacle, but ii re-
minds me of red lantern in street
excavation"
y
An Emmett man, in his wife's alb
sence, ate a lot of canary seed, mis-
taking il for breakfast food, and
ever since he has been sleeping
with his head under his arm.
Heard a; Sundey'G ball game:
Charley think | know why tn
..s,ner and pitcner walk up and wnh
per together. you do, Ell ?" Yes
They are expressing their opinion o.
he umpire"
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
Health and Beauty Answers
BY MRS. NAE MARTINI.

Mrs. X. p: IL your hair Is getting so
thin that you have TO wear false hair,
you should begin at once a treatment
to rid your scalp OF dandruff. which Is
tho direct cause of all scalp and hair
troubles IL you will mix together IN
ounce Of quinzoin, one-half pint OF al
you will have dependable remedy for
your hair troubles. Rub this gently
into the roots Of the hair twice a week,
and II will destroy the dandrun. stop
your falling hair and In time promote
a new growth OF hair. This quinine
tonic applied regularly will make your
hair soft. lustrous and keep II from
splitting at the ends.
Minnie H.: As you do not like the
idea of wearing glasses since they
make you look so much older, why
good eye tonic? II you get an ounce
OF crystos. dissolve 1t in a pint of wa
ter, you will have an eye remedy that
Strengthening. Drop a few drops in
each eye two or three times a day, and
am sure II will do your eyes a world
and IL excellent for smli t, hne e weserY
eyes, and a great aid even to those who
have TO wear glasses.
Victoria: As long as your blood is
ties will be forced through your skin.
and the application of external RENE
dies Will do no lasting good, for they
they do not reach the cause. Dissolve
one ounce of kardene and one half cup
of sugar In one-half pint or alcohol;
then add hot water to make a full
quart, and you will have enough mex,
pensive, old-fashioned remedy TO rid
your blood of impurities, stimulate
your liver and correct your digestion
Take a tablespoonful before each meal
and your saliow skin will again take
on the beautiful color nature intended
you TO have. Your circulation end gem
eral health will improve. and the sores
blotches. redness and other eruptions
will cease to trouble you. No better
general system tonic can be made than
by following this kardene recipe Try
IL. and get rid OF that rundown" feel
Ing.
juliet: Yes, any one afflicted with
| superfiuous flesh Is always at big
disadvantage. whether married or
single To get rid of that annoying fat.
stop at your druggists's the next time
you are are down town and get four
ounces OF parnotis Dissolve this in
III pints hot water and take a table,
spoonful three times a day (five min
utes before each meal). and your bur-
densome flesh will soon be cut down
The effect of this harmless remedy il
generally noticeable within a week. and
you will feel much better.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
IN SOCIETY

Mrs. James Flattery. Miss Flattery
and Frederick X. Flattery are 1t the
Chalfonte. Atlantic City.
Mrs. Fulmer. formerly Miss Viola
Brooks. OF this city. is convalescing
In = San Francisco hospital from the
fever which she contracted In the
Philippines. where she went as q
bride year ago. Mrs. Fulmer was
brought home from the orient by her
mother and husband, Lieut.. John j.
Fulmer. She will return to Detroit
a. soon as her strength permits.
o
The annual state conference OF the
Daughters OF the American Revoiu-
ton will be held in Saginaw this week.
Mrs. Arthur M. Parker. OF this city,
past regent of Louisa st. Clair chap
ter. IL a candidate for the once OF
state regent. Among the Detroit
Daughters to attend the conference as
delegates, are: Mesdames G. II. Met
calf. B. c. Whitney. A. M. Parker, H.
B. Joy, +. T. Ranney, e. w. Stod-
dard. K. A. Fox. Talcott Wing, w.
II. Irvine, Truman Newberry and the
Misses Ida Raymond and Jessie Chase
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

Mrs. j. g.: Wrinkles and other marks
OF approaching old age which now
worry you uo are very common However.
low this simple treatment Apply. 10
your face every night a greaseless
cream jelly made by mixing two tea
spoonfuls glycerine and one ounce al
mozoin into one-half pint cold water.
Stir and let stand several hours before
using. Massage frequently with this
cess OIL from the skin pores and In
time you will not have rough, wrink-
led face, but fresh. smooth. clean
ind this preparation excellent for re-
freckies and large pores in the skin.
r.. p. N: To whiten and beautify
your face, neck and arms, dissolve four
ounces Of spurnax In half-pint hot
Inc. Apply this lotion freely and it
will tone up your skin wonderfully and
quickly. II makes the skin soft and
mnSaY lo a1a which so annoynR n
you. You will find this lotion much
better 10 use than face powder as Il
does not rub or easily like powder nor
look" I fnd this spurmax lotion ex-
cellent for removing and preventing
freckles. chappins and roughness OF
J. o.: To remove those disnguring
hairs from your face and forearms mix
q little delatone with enough water to
make a paste. cover the surface OF the
skin where the unsightly hairs are
growing; let X remain two or three
minutes. then wipe OF and wash the
surface with warm water. Although
your druggist will charge you a dollar
for an ounce OF delatone. this safe
treatment for superfiuous hair Is pre-
ferred to the electric needle. for della
tone IL painless, less expensive and can
be applied In the privacy OF your own
home Should the hairs return they
will be light, thin and straggly. A
second or third treatment with della
tone will remove them forever.
Josephine: In treating your scalp
for dandruff, IL In necessary to keep the
scalp as clean as possible Shampoo
freely and as often as you need IL. but
never use soap or O soap Jelly. as the
alkalj will make your hair dull. lifeless
ana your scalp. harsh. Shampoo with a
teaspoonful OF canthrox dissolved In a
cup OF hot water; then rinse In clear
water. You will ind this a wonderful
shampoo: II will put new life Into your
hair and cleanse your. scalp as no other
shampoo VIII. IL fathers freely. dries
quickly without streaking and leaves
the hair 1ustrous, huffy and easy to do
MP. After the hair Is dry apply the
same tonic recommended to Mrs. r.. T..
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
Long-D Distance Flights
AMERICAN.


IeiOGenn Cuiis to
ioioGien.
1sIe-Hsnry
Is1o-oui. (Fanes)s
lsio-Losis -
SIO-LeBanc,
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

lily lessen her power in the triple role
for which she IL most fitted.
In the arena Of public life women
haven't got chance. Men are strong.
er mentally and physically and wo-
men cannot compete with them.
l think It ia a grand thing to see a
woman taking In washing. She's far
better than her richer sisters who
spend their time taking In men.
think II Ia unfortunate that wo-
men have to work outside the home.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
FARMER HAD H0OKWORM
DISEASE-LIMBS OSSITYING
His Feet, Legs and Hands Are Now
Affected, Victim Suffers But
Little Pain.


RICHMOND, Va, Oct. l1.-Entire
Justification threatens M. L. Peaden. a
farmer of Pitt county, N. c., who is
now under treatment at the Retreat
for the Sick.
Peadens condition Is regarded by
many physicians. who have viewed
the remarkable case, to be due to an
attack OF hookworm disease which he
suffered two years ago. Six months
ago Peaden noticed the hardening Of
the muscles OF his feet, limbs and
hands.
The hradening process continued to
such an alarming degree that they
would crack when Jared by walking
and he was prevented from moving
about much.
The joints of elbows and fingers de-
veloped boil-like ulcers. though other
wise he was In little pain from his
peculiar condition.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
FASHIONS

A new feature In the cut OF Dire
coils skirts for tailored suits and
dresses Is q very broad fiat pleat at
the center back. The effect IL that
OF fattening the figure. giving q very
straight line at the back.
Plain colored silks are much used
for tailored blouses.
Some of the skirts are made with
circular cut bands or fiounces with
out any fullness. and this type of gar
ment Is considered very good.
Many habit-back skirts buttoniNg
down the front or slightly at one side
are seen. but these are not made like
the old-fashioned habit-backs, as they
have little or no flare.
A very pretty juvenile blouse is OF
soft silk and trimmed with piping.
There are also used very small but
tons and q few large ones of liberty
silk tn the same color.
The short sleeved peasant blouse Is
prominent style feature with all
types Of dresses and costumes. The
narrow skirt prevails.
The all-gold or silver laces will be
used on handsome dressy afternoon
and evening frocks, In conjunction
with black. white or ecru maline
laces.
The skirts are being made very
short generally. Extremely narrow
types are seen In high-class lines.
II large pan Is turned over the
irons ON the stove they will heat
more quickly than II left uncovered.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

utes rinse with coldwater and apply
cold cream sparingly. (2) 1t will make
II a little darker. Make strong tea,
and brush 1t through the hair. How
ever, assure you you will not be
pleased with results
Dear Miss Grey: "a What will
keep patent leather from cracking?'
CD What will be the leading colors
In fall suits for middle-aged women?
CD l am 10 and small How long
should my skirts be? (4) How should
| arrange my hair? MARIE.
A.-(D Nothing. (2) Black or any
OF the purple shades. (3) Five inches
from the floor. (4) Just as simply as
possible. A soft fat pompadour or
parted in the middle Choose the most
becoming style) and coiled loosely in
the back just above the nape of the
neck.
Dear Miss Grey: What will remove
white spots which were caused by
hot dishes, from polished table top?
A.-Wipe on quickly with cloth
moistened in alcohol, then wash with
clean wet cloth at once or the alcohol
VIII mar the polish.
Dear Miss Grey: ~ Please tell me
how to clean white window shades
without removing them from the roll
lers. CD Do you advise hair dyes? II
so, please tell me something to re-
store the color of my prematurely
gray hair. Hazel, EYES.
A--W Better remove from roller
and launder. That's the only satisfac-
tory way. CD Indeed I do not The
early change of hair indicates poor
general health. You should improve
your physical condition. Give the
hair an egg shampoo every two
weeks. Rinse well, first with warm,
then with cold. water, and dry with
gentle friction. Use a good hair
tonic daily. Loosen hair and brush
daily for 20 minutes, in the sun II
possible.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

That 10 Why Pullman Porter Grlnned
and Others In Car and at Hotel
Laughed Out Loud.

anu Otnere IN Car ana AZ Totet
Laughed Out Loud.
PORTLAND. Ore, Oct. 11.-With
but few minutes to dress and IN
the darkness OF their Pullman berth,
unlucky lower 1.-TWO young women
carelessly exchanged punches OF sur
plus hair with the result that fellow
passengers, street car conductors, ped
estrians and hotel patrons INDUCED In
wild hilarity at their expense. A
hasty glance into a mirror at the no
tel revealed the cause OF the laughter.
One girl was pronounced brunette
and the other was a striking blonde.
The dark girl had grabbed handful
OF light tresses that go TO make up
curls and puffs and added them to her
own dark hair. The blonde took what
was left, not noticing the difference.
When the mistake was discovered
the two ed for the elevated and did
not reappear until late in the evening,
when their tresses, from all outward
appearances. were OF natural growth.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

fere too much
with their pleas
urss. their figures.
! think woman
never exercises
her great influence
90 strongly and
subliuiely a. when
she lives a. the
mistress Of Z
home, the darling
mother Of heI
children, and the
queen of her hus'
bands heart.
The new de
mand of woman
for equality with
man will nocenaar
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
WHILE HE BUYS CIGARS
TRAIN WITH BRIDE GOES
Hires Fast Taxi and Overtakes Both
After q Thlrty-eight Mile
Chase.


TACOMA, Wash, Oct. 1l.--Alight-
ing from q Northern Pacific train at
the railroad station at Seattle TO get
some cigars. Charles o. Marvin, OF
New Haven. Conn, sa wthe train pull
ing out from the depot when he re.
turned. His bride. TO whom he was
married two weeks ago in the Con-
uecticut city. remained in her coach.
Marvin hired taxicab and started
ON race after the train. They were
two minutes behind at Auburn. Is
miles from Seattle, but with better
roads from there on the speed Of the
machine increased and they pulled
into the Northern Pacific station here
% miles. ten minutes ahead Of the
train.
When Marvin greeted his bride she
WAS In tears over their involuntary
separation. 49,,
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

Miss Jessie Duncan Hills, q sister OF
Mrs. n. &. DIN, No. 40 Henry-st,
died Monday, OF tuberculosis. For
some years Miss Hills had made her
home with Mrs. DIN The body will
be taken to Syracuse. N. Y, for bur-
tal
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
THE SPHERE OF WOMAN.

They talk about a woman's
sphere,
AS though 1t had limit;
There's not a place In earth or
heaven,
There's not task to mankind
given.
There's not blessing OF
woe,
There's not a whispered yes or
no,
There's not a life, or death, or
birth,
That has q feathers weight OF
worth
Without a woman In II.
\-Anon.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

Coffee taffy is new confection. In
stead OF water, use coffee to dilute
the sugar. Cook in the usual man
ner and pull the taffy the same as the
old-fashioned variety. AS 1t begins
to stiffen, roll the candy In ground
nuts and break into desired lengths.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

ance. one can be perfectly dressed for
all occasions.
II has eight buttons. BY adjusting
the buttons different gowns are pro-
duced. The morning suit becomes an
seroplane. automobile or "hobble"
gown, this In turn is an afternoon or
calling gown. Then at last this Is
slipped of and an evening array Is
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11
LIFE WORTH LIVING.

II can stop one heart from
breaking
| shall not live in vain;
II / can ease one life the
aching,
Or cool one pain.
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again
/ shall not live In vain.
Emily Dickerson.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

advertises himself
for sale for one
year to the highest
bidder. He Is to
be furnished with
board, room and
clothes and the
amount of the
highest bid shall
be paid him at the
end OF the year.
He wants to be
trained In some
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

For darning rent In fine white
goods use one strand of fine spool
cotton, No. 80. untwisting the thread.
This makes a more invisible darn
than does the finest twisted thread.
The Detroit times., 1910-10-11

Good substitutes for the ironing
sheet and blankets, which always
Used to be thought essential Tor the
laundry, are heavy canton flannel and
unbleached cotton cloth