davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
COMPENSATION.

My neighbor has a daughter sweet,
And she's a winSome lass. it's true;
She is dream from head to feet,
A lass to stir one through and through
1 like to see her moving round;
1t makes my very heart rejoice;
But she brings sorrow, too, I've found
Her sutton has a tenor voice.
He comes at early eve and soon
His voice is floating on the air,
He gets a grimace from the moon
And all the stars sit up and stare;
The dogs all howl, the neighbors rave,
hear them signing as they say:
Wont some good, kind fool-killer save
Us from that donkey's dreadful bray?'
I like the gfrl-that's true enough!
To see her gone is not my choice;
But just the same think it's tough
I've got to stand that suitorS voice.
hope he'll wed her soon and go
To some far-distant foreign shore
I'll miss the maid all right but, oh,
I'll hear that tenor voice no more!
Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
QUAKER MEDITATIONs.
TFrom the Philadelphia Record

TFrom the Philadelphia Reeord.l
All the rules that glitter are not golden
rules.
Even on a football night the town is
never quite as red as it is painted.
A woman must take her husband as she
takes her religion, that is on faith.
The girl with a broken heart should
bear in mind that accidents will happen.
ANY magistrate will tell you that it's
when a fellow is down and out that he is
sent up.
No, Maude dear; we have never heard
of a watch that was run by a mineral
spring.
1t seems more than a coincidence that
the devil is the mother Of invention
Unlike his master the hunting dog can
go right through the underbrush without
getting any burs on his pants.
The politician who works for his party
generally gets job where it isn't neces-
sary for him to work any longer.
Hoax-"Why don't you take that dog
of yours to the laundrY?' Joax-"What
for?'' Hoax-''To have his muzzlin'
DONE
Billy-fYour aunt Is a wonderfully pre-
served woman. All the fellows just dote
on her. AIilly-"Yes, she's regular
antidote."
Coming events always cast their
shadow before them" said the optimist.
st suppose that's why the future is al
ways so dark" sighed the pessimist.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
.AYHAWKER JOTS

Wichita is fixing up gymnasium
so that the cops there can get phySi-
cal training. If past performances
count for anything, that's not the kind
of training the Wichita policemen
need.
There wa a man in our town, who
thought he was wondrous wise; he
swore by all the tabled gods, he'd never
ad 'ertise. But, alas! He advertised,
and thereby hangs a tale, his ad. was
set in nonpariel, and headed Sheriff s
Sale. Troy Chief.
Commenting on the announcement
of a Kansas man that good wine can
be made from tomatoes, the Osborne
Farmer has the audacIty to remark;
I'VE have always insisted that when
ever the tomato did start in the race
it wouldn't take long to catsup."
Mary Shiftless, oldest daughter Of
Old Bill, always had nice dark hair
until recently, reports Deacon Walker.
But she sent away for a recipe and
has been washing it in some kind of
dope that is causing it to turn a
lighter color. The boys are all CIV
ing Mary the horse laugh, but she
can't see it, and imagines she is surely
turning into a Real Queens
A plumber went into a barber shop
the other day to get shaved, relates
the Atchison Globe. He gave the bar
Der a dollar and received two cents
in change. "How's this?" the plumber
asked in surprise. Never mind" the
barber replied; you went up to my
house the other day, worked fifteen
minutes and the bill was SO cents.
I'm getting even. That's how it comes"
A movement is on foot to compel the
shippers of whisky to plainly label each
package on the outside so that the
nature of it's contents may be easily
known. If this movement is success
full, says the Leavenworth Post, the
hypocrite who bowls for prohibition
365 days a year and has an express
package marked, Hardware" delivered
at his door once a week, will get n
real touch of prohibition.
There was once a Winfield man, says
the Press, whose mother was an
Episcopalian, whose father was hard
shell Baptist and whose grandparents
were Quakers. The man married a
woman whose mother was a JeWess,
whose father was a Catholic and whose
grandparents were Mennonites. The
man joined the Methodist church, the
woman Joined the Lutheran and all
= cir children are Christian Scientists.
Maybe you think there is not some in
teresting religious talk when that fam
lily has reunions on anniversaries.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

is tn suggestion of frost in the air
early one morning.
The grain is now yellow with patches
OF green-the reverse of last weeks
condition. Under the influence of the
blazing, burning sun the yellow throws
of the suggestion of frost and wades
into the fast disappearing ranks of
green. Two or three days more and
the green is gone, routed, vanquished.
The yellow, now tipping into golden
brown, dominates the field. Another
day or so and early one morning a
binder sings in the field. The grain is
ripe and ready. 1t has been saved, and
none is there to care for the biting,
singing, killing frost that comes a few
nights later. The homesteader has
made a gamble. He has gambled with
nature-and won.
And this is the annual gamble that
human beings are making with natuNe
throughout these western provinces of
Canada. During the ten-day period of
ripening season every year there is the
danger that a killing frost will catch
the grain.
The margin of time between the
ripening and the killing frosts is so
small that every where in these grain
growing provinces there is that anxious
ten-day period-the anxiety based on
the fear that the margin of safety will
disappear and the frost catch the grain
before it is ripe and ready.
This, fundamentally, is the heart Of
the western Canada proposition, ana
the people living there realize it. TRAY
cling through these provinces, talking
with the elevator men, the merchants,
the farmers, the bankers, the home
steaders, one cannot but catch this
note of uneasiness. 1t is in the air.
Consciously or subconsciously, it is in
every ones mind.
True, in the few years that grain has
been grown in this country the farmer
has always won the chance, but by so
close a margin thai there always re-
mains behind the fear-the great fear
of the northwest prairie country
Success Magazine.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

cold. At your age took squills when
had a cold.''
"YeH-yell-yelll" exclaimed the
girl in a stage whisper.
"I-want-Etheli" was fairly
roared.
From the Evening Times Ell?
And you want to interview me on the
Japanese question: queried Mr..
Garrison. as he seated himself. Very
well, sir. I have made three differ
ent trips to Japan, and believe / I'M
derstand the people as few Americans
do. There will be no war between
Japan and the United States. You
can say SO on my authority.
Miss Ethel had advanced into the
room, but keeping out of range of
vision. Her lover looked at her with
despair in his eyes.
you've got to make him hear!
she said.
But how can II"
Hes started on the subject of ia
pan and will talk for hours"
But his trumpet is gone and l
yelled my loudest. Ethel must give
you up"
Give up nothing! Write what you
want to say and hand 1t to him. There
is pencil and paper"
I'm shaking so that couldnt
write a word. 1t is terrible to know
that we must part. That is, we must
part or elope. That is, can't make
him understand me until he gets q
new trumpet"
But I can and Will"
She advanced till her father caught
sight of her, and smiled and held out
his hand, and then she funneled her
hands each side of his ear, and stand
ing on tiptoes, she shrieked:
DO you hear that!"
Yes, family
Mr.. Enright wants to ask your con-
sent to our marriage. Do your catch
it?"
ooh, yes"
And what do you say?"
why, say he'd have saved half an
hours time by asking me when he
first came in!"-(Copyrighted 1910 by
Associated Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe.l

IFTom the AtchtSOn Globe.
The fact that he knows nothing about
a subject isn't much of an inducement for
the average man to keep still; indeed, it
often seems to work the other way
1t is all right to wear summer under
wear in the winter if you want to, or
chew your food to liquid: it is telling
about these things in a superior way
which makes people tired.
Formerly we didn't pay much attention
to flies, but since hearing so much about
flies having a thousand legs, and a case
of typhoid on each leg, we shoe them
more than we formerly did.
When you meet a farmer and his wife
on the street, and say to them: How
are you getting along?' and the wife re-
it?" you can easily tell who is boss in
that family.
A. boy will go to his mother, and COM
plain that he has lost his knife some
other article. And his mother will say,
well, 1 didn't lose it; 1 can't help it,
but all the same, she will look for it. and
find it.
A girl who will sue man for breach
of promise has as much nerve as man
who will back out of a wedding at the
last moment, and still remain in town.
The women are already beginning to
take notice. about Christmas presents,
but in the delicate way which character
ICES new widower when he first begins
to take notice"
You haven't one chance in a thousand
of finding a gold mine; but, if you are
industrious honest. and faithful, the
chances are ninety-nine in a hundred that
you will succeed
The poorest guesser on earth is the
person who guesses how fast an automo-
guesser than the one who guesses on
the number of people in a crowd
There once lived in Atchison a bust
ness man who was noted for politeneSs
along with a good deal of ability. He
has been dead fifteen years, but people
still talk about him. You know people
more az its
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Somebody else usually suffers the
most from your more serious mistakes.
True happiness is such rare bird
that few persons succeed in catching
a specimen.
Many people would not have to work
as hard as they do if others only did
their full share.
An enthusiastic optimist not only
hopes for the best. He has it. That's
why he's an optimist.
y :"
1t is not always well to judge a man
by his reputation. 1t may be the handi-
W ork Of his enemies.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
BIRDS IN DISGRACE IN KANSAS

Birds IN DlSCRACE In KANSAS,
A death sentence has been pro-
nounced, says the Industrialist, the
weekly publication issued by the Kan
sas State Agricultural college, upon
four families of birds in Kansas: Spar
| rows, blackbirds crows and jaybirds.
The sentence is legal in the case of two
| of these families. Public opinion is
responsible for the others fate. Many
persons believe these four bird fam
| lilies do more damage than good 70
/ crops There is an almost uniform
bounty of five cents apiece for crows
and smaller less uniform bounty for
sparrows. Blackbirds and Jays have
SO far escaped a bounty, but they are
under fire of the farmers to almost rs
great a degree as crows Sparrows
have fewer redeeming characteristics
than any of the others. They do much
damage to crops, especially to the small!
grain crops, and do very little to COM
pensate a farmer for letting them live
Although blackbirds do much dam
age to corn and other crops, credit must
be given them for partly paying their
board by catching worms and insects.
While young they live wholly upon in
sects. The old birds will follow the
plow in the spring and pick up all the
grubworms, after scratching them out
of the loose soil. The greatest dam
age done to crops by this bird is in
the spring when the corn is coming up.
The birds eat the seeds and scatter the
plants. In some communities they also
eat much of the corn when it is in the
milky stage. Their appetite for insects
is all that saves them, and the scales
are so evenly balanced that it is still
question whether the blackbird should
be killed. Public sentiment is con-
stantly growing in favor of his destruc-
ton The habits of the crow are very
similar to those of the blackbird. Crows
do more damage in the fall after the
crop is cut and shocked than before it
is cut. They are not such great de-
stroyers as are the bIackbirds. but they
make up for this deficiency by their
work as scavengers. Where crows are
numerous it is almost impossible to gec
a good stand of corn or any other crop
that grows slowly at first. They be-
came so numerous a few years ago us
to be a menace. The law providing for
a bounty on crows scalps was the re-
suit. The jay is more of a nuisance
than the others. His greatest fault is
the robbing the nests of other more de-
sirabIe birds. He not only destroys
the eggs but if the young are Matched
he kills them. His greatest enemy is
the owl, a very useful bird. Because
of his destructiveness the jaybird has
been sentenced, by public opinion, TO
execution.
The bIackbird's death is not generally
conceded to be a necessity. Unless they
become too numerous the destruction
they do will be more than balanced oy
the good service. AS they now are in
Kansas they should be looked upon as
an economic good and not be de-
strOyed
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
HUNOR or THE DIP

Mr.; standardization bill is to me a
great sadness.
Creditor-I only wish it were settled
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Bazaar.
stella-Do you do your Christmas shop
Bella-Of course, but 1 never buy till
the last minute.-New York Sun.
Gyer-Lightning recently struck a man
in Kansas and cured him of dyspepsia
Myer-How do you know that?
Gyer-His widow told me.-Chicago
Lady with some hesitation)-I-er-
wish to look at some false fringes.
Tactful SaleSman-Certainly, madam
What shade does your friend wish?-
Punch.
Father-Do you mean to tell me YOU
didn't say a word when that young man
Daug6ter-why. dad. how could 1?
--Pick-Me-Up.
yisitor.1s this lake in your garden
Child Of the House-No. stree. It's
real. fell in and got as wet as any
thing.-St Louis Republic.
~, DID your an,cestors have family tree.
Family tree, it is, ma'am? One of me
ancestors controlled tn intire priyileTe
of the Garden of Eden."-Tit-Bits.
Bluftton-I said something to my wife
last week that offended her and she
hasn't spoken to me since.
Henpeck-Qreat Scott, mani You cant
remember what it was, can you?-Puck
.o How does Santa Claus manage to
ney." ~-4'iii-
We'll, he can send 'em up in the dumb
waiter, can't he?"-Pittsburg Post. '-"
% Why didn't he wait until New Years
THE last time he came home swizzled
ms wife painted a swapping turtle red.
white and blue and turned it loose in his
Young Mother-Tm sorry, Mr.. TopfIoor
II tpaoys CRYING annoyed you. He's been
Topfloor "a crusty bachelor)-That's II,
knife Fns id to D 81 1etSi9s child
Suppose Kissed the villain, ''supposa
our plot should leak out?" oppose
That's, ali right" said his accomplice.
eonsolingly 1t can't Don't you re,
member telling me FIVE minutes age that
Quirer
,,rS e ti,g to .t the North Pole is no pleas
well" answered the Arctic explorer
it reminds me somewhat of the average
to start and so glad to get home."~Wasbss
ington Star.
do you Know, asked the doctor, that
you?" Al
NO" said little Elsie, them ain,t mi
crobes. 1 have to scratch that wav -
cause mamma made me put on w0oleps
this morning. Chicago Record-HeraId
When young fellers gets a courtin,. :.
said Farmer Corntossel, they sure So,
plumb crazy, an that boy Sam - rS5I,
amt no exception" lis
so Sans started. eh?'' aueried III
nearest neighbor ms
=, s Ssaa.e1 should say SOL exclaimed
irf - y, - nsss5, why. didn't he go
l 1IG eo~n yeseeru an blow in half a
WnsIr,w 1oI loolnOrush Harper
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

and which will be of real benefit to the
school children of the state. This was
an important element in the fight
which Topekans waged so successfully
some months ago for the election Of a
school board that would administer the
school affairs of this city in a fashion
different from that which had pre-
vailed. And at that time there were
some people in Topeka who styled that
agitation as being revolutionary, as
being an effort to tear down the school
system of Topeka, rather than to build
it up on more modern and effective
lines
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Although the railrod strike in France
has been settled, an occasional bomb is
still being tossed at railroad property
The French, being a frugal people,
probably made a lot more bombs than
were necessary for strike purposes.
especially as the strike was of shorter
duration than was contemplated. AMI
having these bombs on hand, they just
naturally can't resist the temptation
of using them and getting their
-loney's worth out of them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
Gamble with Nafure.

For ten days and ten nights earlv IN
august the Canadian homesteader is
uneasy. The hot sun of long summer
day helps the feeble patches of yellow
in the grain to make deep inroads into
the mass of green.
Day by day the conquering yellow
sends its color over the reeeding green,
until the field stands half and half
Night by night the homesteader
watches the temperature, the winds
and the clouds. Each night is a bit
colder than the preceding one. There
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

In view of the fact that Colonel
Roosevelt has given such a strong en-
dorsement to Senator Lodge who is
making such a vigorous fight for the
Republican cause in Massachusetts in
the hope that he will be reelected to
the United States senate, it is reason
able to assume that Senators LaFoI-
lette, Cummins, Bristow, Beveridge and
other Roosevelt devotes will hasten TO
Massachusetts, to aid III the cause of
their brother senator.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Bourke Cochran, who has been a
Democratic congressman from New
York state on several occasions, has
made another political flip-flop. He is
now supporting the Republican ticket
in the New York campaign. This is
no new procedure for Mr.. Cochran. He
supported Mr.. Mckinley in his first
campaign and opposed him in the next
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Chancellor Frank Strong of the Uni
versity Of Kansas and retiring presi-
dent of the State Teachers associa-
tion, has come out strong in favor IF
more industrial education in the schools
OF Kansas. In other words he favors
public education along practical lines
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

TFrom the New York Press.]
woman can believe in anything if it's
only unbelievable enough
Dogs nick men to admire with about
as mucfg reason as women do.
There's nothing sounds to you so much
like the real thing as flattery when you
are the one getting 1t.
If there was a tenth of the charity in
the world that there is self-esteem no
body would ever be in want
A man with any sense at all knows
better than not to like his wifes new
hat and so have to pay for another.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Although it would be lamentabIc,
there would be nothing so very unusual
about the present freight rate contro-
versy getting into politics, the POSSIBLE
ity of which is suggested in recent dis
patches from Washington. Everything
seems to get into politics in this coun-
fv1v
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Speaking of grandiloquence, how
about the reply of z. H. Sothern when
he was asked directly if he intended to
marry Julia Marlowe. now that he had
been divorced by Virginia Harmed.
''That honor has not been vouchsafed
to me-" said Mr.. Sothern. Surely this
will be sufficient to melt the fair Julia
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

The so-called Panama libel suit on
the part of the government against the
New York World has reached the SUI
preme court of the United States. The
justices of the court should be careful
in handling the matter. Colonel Roose-
welt was instrumental in starting this
suit and there are few stronger words
left in the English language than
"fossilized"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Moving pictures and interesting lee
lures are to be provided for the in
mates Of the states penitentiary at
Lansing. If this thing keeps up it
won't be long now before the state
authorities will have to use the peni-
Tertiary guards to keep folks from
breaking into the institution. instead
of employing the guards as hereto
fore to keep those on the inside from
breaking out
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

should purchase pair of buffaloes to
be used as the nucleus in the estab-
1ishment of a menagerie at Kage's
park is a good ont. No good reason can
be advanced why Topeka should not
have a zoo, and it is particularly ap-
propriate that buffaloes should have a
prominent place in it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Without taking into consideration the
merits of the controversy, the Mis-
souri, Pacific is entitled to a little
sympathy for having a large strike on
Its hands. Surely the Missouri Pacific
has trouble enough in operating its
trains on much of its roadbed.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

Chicago women are wearing hobble
skirts to dances. 1t will strike the
average intellect that hobble skirts and
big feet are mighty poor combination
for dancing.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is a member of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report Of that great news or
ganization for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka
The news Is received in The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

When General Funston gets back to
the Philippines he'll be likely to find
a substantial bridge over the river that
he was once forced to swim.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

And incidentally, an automobile was
not able to put Nelson w. Aldrieh,
United States senator from Rhode
Island, down and out
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

The latest thing in Peruvian banks:
The cabinet of Peru has resigned as a
protest against the way the affairs of
that country are being conducted.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

History and gossip both repeat them
selves.
1t is hard climb getting up in the
climb down again.
Warden Codding assures us that the
convict is not a hopeless individual.
there's hope.
Some time ago Col Roosevelt an
nounced that the Belamy- Dearmaria in
cldent was closed. 1t appears. how
ever, that he forgot and left the can
opener where Prof. E. H. Woodruff
could find it.
Historians claim that the ancient
Roman senators were reasonably hon
est. Perhaps they were. The togas
they wore were not equipped with pock-
cts or other modern conveniences, and
the bath rooms were out in the open.
Sometimes, by permitting a little
grass to grow under your feet, you may
postpone the time when it will be grow
ing over your head. Haste causeth a
hot box.
COMING: The day when the tough
turkey and the dull carving knife may
get together.
Pre1udice-popular definition: "What
the other fellow thinks is his opinion
LOVELY CHARACTERS: Lesson VI.
Elizabeth.
Among the Lovely Characters. was
Queen Elizabeth,
Whose soul-inspiring pastime was to
put her friends to death.
When Lizzie got acquainted with the
owner Of a throne
Shed soon cut her acquaintance, just
above the collar-bone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-10-24

1t is hard work to convince some peo-
pie that doing nothing is the hardest
kind of work.