Omaha daily bee., 1910-08-01

nipples en- hho QuxfouN Oh 1hAe
~ seen In the crest American
Metropolis frem nag ~ nay.
Automobile drivers in New York City are
being subjected to a midsummer third
degree OF unlocked for severity. They
are required under the new law to pass an
examination into their ability to handle
cars, their knowledge Of car mechanism
and incidentally. their general intelligence
Examinations. both practical and oral, have
been going on for ten days and will be COM
pleted by August J. when the law penalizeN
driver without a license 1t speaks wen
both for the efficiency OF the chauffeurs
and tho leniency of the law that out OF 305
applicants but fifteen we're rejected, while
five others were held under advisement.
After the driver has passed his examna-
ton by question, road test comes, that his
skill, GOODNESS and practical knowledge In
handling a machine may be discovered. An
inspector will sit beside the driver and
watch him operate under difficult condi-
tions, in the most congested sections OF the
city.
The dyspeptic who gives prayerfui thought
to every bite he eats sat down at restaur-
French menu card on which a dozen items
we're marked with a cross in red ink.
ITO my untutored mind, said he, chose
things sound all right. Some other fellow
with a stomach has been here ahead of me
and has marked off the few things that
Christian can eat without inviting sudden
death"
In his delight at finding the dinner prob
vi al fhn I've
peptic ordered ak Of the red cross dishes.
They were unpronounceable and unrecog
nisable, but they tasted good and the man
liked them. When the last crumb of the
last course had disappeared the dyspeptc
said genially to the waiter:
Rum old chap that must have been that
ate at this table ahead Of me-"
Yes sir" assented the waiter He was
one OF them diet cranks that drive restaur-
ant people crazy by marking up the bill of
fairs with red danger signals before the
dishes that nobody that amt got a sound
digestion dares to trifle with"
Good Lordl'' said the dyspepdo and
bclted for the nearest doctor.
Herman Gross, driver and understudy
for a street singer and peddler Of popular
music, was q prisoner in the Tombs court
accused Of having murdered Annie Laurie
in the public streets. Patrolman Ward of
the Fulton street police station was his
accuser He asked that the singer be pun
ished for disorderly conduct
II like music as well as anyone" Ward
said, but the line must be drawn some
where. This fellow was down in Cortlandt
street on Saturday afternoon and the way
he murdered Annie Laurie was scanda-
lous. He is a regular musical Jack the
Ripper. -
Magistrate Murphy looked at the prisoner
savagely and then reminded the policeman
that the charge against Gross was dis
orderly conduct and not murder.
''Oh, he didn't kill anyone, but the way
he murdered the tune of that touching
ballad was Shameful Ward explained.
When he sang For Annie Laurie I'd lay
me down and dee 1 almost wished he
would do It,"
What have you got to say for yourself,
DGross2" the magistrate inquired.
The regular singer was Ill from over
work, and had to do a double turn "
the prisoner said. You see, judge, it's
not my business to sing, drive the horse
that hauls the piano. but did the best 1
could. I'm no Caruso''-
well, as you're not Caruso, I'll fine
you 81 for peddling Annie Laurie with
out license" the magistrate retorted.