Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1910-03-17
Doing Things
Differently

/ Differently /
If only the Criswells were content
to live according to conventional rule
existence doubtless would be much
smoother for them. Also for others.
1t principally is others who rebel
against the Criswells' cheerfully &C.
centric method of conducting them
selves, their household and their af-
fairs in general, because when things
go wrong the Criswells are never
bothered nor upset, having childlike
and joyous interest in whatever is I'M
usual.
When couple who have been mar
ried eight years get energetic enough
to go to ball the usual method of
procedure after the dance is over is
for the masculine member to yawn,
mutter YEARLY that he has to get up
at seven in the morning just the same
and why the dickens doesn't the taxi
get them home faster-while his wife
says her head aches and somebody
else's gown was far prettier than hers
and oh, my, but she is sleepy!
Not the Criswells, however! When
they reached their home shelter at
two o'clock the other morning after
dancing since nine they surveyed one
another meditatively.
I'm starved" said Mrs. Criswell.
"Sosm To aorood Cr;cuoN
With one accord they made for the
kitchen. When the light was switched
on and disclosed a disguised and
startled mouse scurrying wildly for
shelter Mrs. Criswell did not faint.
Both she and her husband gurgled
joyously. She grabbed broom, Girls
well seized the poker.
Probably there is some costume ap-
propriate for the pastime Of killing
| mice, but whatever it may be 1t assured
ly is not trailing lavender satin and
brand new dress suit. Still, the con-
seriousness that they were inappropri-
ately clothed had no lettering effect
on the Criswells. A boiler factory in
i
possibly could have made more noise
than did they with broom. poker, over
turned chairs and falling dishpans.
Finally, the intruder was dis
patched and swept outdoors, the Girls
wells repaired personal damages and
once more attempted frugal lunch
They got it with some minor mishaps.
Criswell knocked over jar of pre-
serves and his wife in pulling out the
silver drawer pulled it too far, splitting
a peck or so of table implements all
over the hardwood floor. Still, they
laughed so much that their troubles
more than paid for themselves.
Just as Criswell pushed his chair
back from the table a point Of light
glittered at him from the library
Diving toward it, he quickly emerged
with large toy engine in his hands.
Elmer" said his wife. 81 hate to
appear inquisitive-bct would you
mind telling me if you have quite lost
your senses? Have you still at this
thirst for amusement that you have to
fall back on Tommy,S toy engine?
Isn't dinner party. a dance. mouse
killing bee-and supper enough"
That's all right, Minnie said
Criswell soothingly "You know
you're just as crazy over this fool
thing as am and it's never worked
right since Tommy got it Christmas
and | don't know of better time to
fix it,"
The engine was an affair run by
gas, SO the Criswells with much labor
got it attached to the gas fixture
Then on hands and knees they
watched it plunge madly across the
hardwood floor, chugging in very
business-like manner. 1t was while
they were thus occupied that a noise
interrupted them. Raising their heads
from their absorbing occupation they
saw enter what Mrs. Criswell after
ward said was the biggest policeman
she had ever in all her life beheld Be-
hind was policeman still bigger,
who in turn was trailed by the biggest
policeman of all. They regarded the
two persons in evening garb with sus-
picion.
/ "Whatchu dom here?" demanded
the biggest policeman.
Even the Criswells could see how
foolish and inadequate it sounded to
explain that they were running a
child's toy engine at three o'clock in
the morning. That was why they
were meek when they had to explain
the mouse-killing in the kitchen and
; the crash of silver in the dining-room
and why they insisted piteously in
stead of wrathfully that they lived
there and had right to run toy en-
gines in the middle of the night if
they wanted to. 1t was not till Nora
and Mary, the maids, who, reused
from slumber by the weird noises
downstairs, had telephoned the police
station that there were burglars in
the house and their employers were
out peered in timorously, that the