davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

mucker. A bird in the hand is the noblest
work of God. Take care of the pennies
and the dollars will be completely taken
care of by a number of gentlemen in the
same line of business as myself. Remem-
Der that the rolling stone gathers moth
ing else but moss and moss is a compare
tive drug on the market but don't let
that worry you. Any time your moss be-
gins to have value there's a number of
handy chaps up my way that'll be glad
to come out and give you a good close
trim, twice over. Be content with your
lot, even If It's a vacant lot which 1t no
doubt will be- says John w, with air
of bluff candor, especially the bluff part.
Let others engage in the mad pursuit OF
great wealth. Let me do it. But not
you. ] can tell with half an eye that
you are temperamentally untitled for the
possessorship at any one time of more
than eight dollars and a quarter. Few
are, in this country. Be frugal and null
tiply. The subtraction will be looked
after by myself and few others; also
the division. Remember that after all
the game is not worth the scandal-par-
don me, meant candle says John w.
With these few words l will conclude,
wishing you one and all kind good
night And the audience filed out deeply
impressed and walked home to save
trolley fare, while the orator of The even
ing climbs into his private ear, tells the
Smoke to take something off the ice and
put something more on, and pulls out
for the next stopping place. So, three
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

there are no blackballs recorded, the Of
fetal toothpiclsist brings you a tooth
pick on a gold-mounted truck and sticks
around until he gets tip. when he in
suits you and goes away. The other
members of the staff have already insult
ed you several times apiece, SO they have
nothing to think about but getting their
tips.
IN fancy let us enter one of these
splendid establishments, Larry. Any one
of them will do. Who is that sitting yon-
der at the center table glittering with
diamonds like the roof of a hot house.
waited on like an Oriental potentate and
basl1ing in the smile of queen of comic
opera who sits opposite him. dressed up
like a third alarm, and ordering dishes
of food with prices of more than three
syllables? That is no other than James
B. Jewelry, the Great White Father of
the Great White Way, who is honored to
all men because he hasn't missed a first
night in ten years and has therefore be-
come a Broadway institution. And who Is
that in the adjoining place of honor who
drinks his soup with a pronounced lisp
manner? That Is another local favcfite,
he being the chief low comedian IN a
Tired Business Mems Musical Show. But
who is the Insignificant duh who Is
jammed up under a paper palm. next to
the pantry door, where the walters can
spill things on him coming out and fan
over him going in? That's only poor
unfortunate, unknown, stock size MIL
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

the hearty contempt Of the persons who
do you the honor of taking ii away from
you.
Any night you can go into one of the
glorious food grottoes that dot our main
street and behold one of the most pitiful
spectacles of modern times. You know
the kind of place l mean-where eight
rear admirals of the Brazilian navy, in
full dress uniform, stand at the pave
ment edge in a naughty line watching
you fall out of a cab If you presume to
come on foot they won't even watch you.
Inside you are met by three bright lads
dressed almost exclusively in rows OF
buttons down the front like one of those
things that a Chinaman figures up a
laundry bill with, and they take charge
of your hat, with the guarantee that
they'll give it back to you, or one al
most as good, upon payment of suita-
BILE sum to each of them. Once 1t only
took one boy to check a hat Three are
now required because the other two need
the money. There's one captain of the
walters, one first lieutenant of walters,
one wine clerk, two plain walters and
one omnibus to each table. The sole
means of support to all this standing
army is to be found sitting at the table,
at the point marked X. he being the guy
who's buying. Everything Is done on
scale of the utmost magnifcence. IL you
want a toothpiek you tell the bus and
he tells the waiter and the waiter trans
mits the request to headquarters by spe-.
cial uniformed messenger and the board
of governors takes vote on it and II
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02
k<YKNTw him. Horatio..


And l did know Phil Thompson.
What charming voice it was,
what a sweet smile was hisl He did
draw men to him and grappled their love
never thing sordid. could be associated
with Phil Thompson, and so prone was
he to open mind-as he ever was to open
hand-that he was equal friend to them
twain, John G. Carlisle and Joseph c. s.
Blackburn. Both trusted him, both loved
him, for. big as was that great heart,
there was no room for thing ignoble
in it.
His acquaintance was wide and thou
sands of his friends will echo the follow
ing tribute to him in an editorial iii the
Washington Post:
Yesterday, at Harrodsburg, Ky, the
place of his birth, the c1ods fell on the
coffin of Phil Thompson. His life was
fitful and sometimes stormy, but of him
may be written:
Lofty and sour to them that loved him
not;
But to those men that sought him, sweet
as summer
"And that he was. He was a manly
man. 1t were impossible to associate
a meanness with him. His instincts were
lofty, and nothing base ever found lodg-
nent in his heart; that was as gentle
as it was valiant.
MANY a tear was compelled when the
news flashed, Phil Thompson is dead
for he not only commanded the respect
but the love of men. What beautiful
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

voice was his. What a CHEEKY sound it
was What a winning smile! And many
is the mendicant in this town who will
miss his open-handed bounty.
1.-THE sod will rest light and blue grass
will laugh melodiously above the manly
breast of Young Phil Thompson
A little more than GA years ago Phil
Thompson and his twin brother, John B.,
were born at Harrodsblirg, Ky. Their
father was ''Old Phil" with a single ex-
ception the last surviving commissioned
officer of the volunteer sodierly Ken
lucky sent to fight in the Mexican war.
His brother was the famous John B.
Thompson, who served repeatedly in
Congress from Kentucky, and rounded
out his political career as a senator In
Congress for the term 1S55-59.
The boys were named for these two
Phil for his father and John for his un-
Gle. 1t is not a curious, but a common
fact of the Kentucky of that day that
old Phil and old John took opposite Sides
in the stormy days of 1861. Phil went
south with his twin boys, then under
16, and John was a stalwart Union man.
Old John B. Thompson was whig and
beat Charles A. Wickliffe for Congress
in 1889. 1t was the closest of races and
for weeks the result was in doubt, for 1T
was ere the day of telegraphs, and there.
was not railroad in the district, which
embraced many counties, covering vast
geographical territory One night per-
haps three weeks after the election, the
father of Jack Chinn came tearing into
Harrodsburg on horseback with the news
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02
PHIL THOMPSON-By Savoyard

wealth, my brother of the bar who is to
follow me in the argument of this prose
cution, was the most inveterate, the most
brilliant, the most accomplished, the most
successful of all John Morgan's horse
thievesr'
The courtroom was crowded and from
the judge on the bench himself one of
Morgan's men, to the idlest on-looker, all
were convulsed with laughter that roared
throughout the auditorium-all except
young Phil who was as solemn as clock
and In something like a rage.
When his father concluded, young Phil
addressed the jury, pointing at the facts,
admonishing them of their sworn duty,
and demanding that justice be indicated.
1t was without avail. The jury grinned,
the laughter was yet uproarious in the
room, and after three minutes "delibera-
ton" the jury returned verdict Of mot
guilty.
Old Phil Thompson was without a peer
as g. criminal lawyer, even In Kentucky,
and young Phil was one commonwealth
attorney whose every indictment success
fully withstood, In the court above as
well as the court below, the scrutiny
raised by demurrer.
It was in 1878 that Milt Durham was a
candidate for reelection to Congress
from the Eighth district. James r. Nc
Creary, Just out of the executive mansion
at Frankfort, was a candidate. Mckee
Fox was a candidate, and the boys
brought out young Phil. The conven-
ton was held at Somerset, as I now rec
ollect, and there were 100 ballots without
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

lionaire He made a paltry million or two
in the high grass eountry and came to
New York because somebody told MIN
New York was the place to live If man
had money, only to find that mis- one
chance of breaking into print is TO be
run over by a truck and tina, the CHER
privilege to which his wealth entities
him is paying twice as much for thing
as anybody else and then getting only
There are several Thousand of this sort.
hopelessly lost in great city, and no
rescue expeditions ont either There ne
SITS unnoticed, unwepf, unhonored and
unsung, uneverything except unstpng.
with nowhere to go out oht and nowhere
to come but back. II he'd only stayed in
Alfalfa, Iowa, he ,uld have been The
Leading Citizen all the rest of his life,
with his wifes name in the society col
umn not less than thres separate and dis
tinct times every issue. Our old chum-
John w, is right. The only way to over
come the handicap Of A few millions is
either to keep on doubling the pile until
1t gets heavy enough 10 make a crash or
else to step into the limellght and do
solo on the slide trombone
1T was hearin' fellow say the ether
day that II was better to be an humble
husbandman than a pampered million
are" said the House Detective. Jest
wot is a humble husbandmanT'
IAN humble husbandman." said the
Hotel Clerk, rs a person that's married
to a suffragette.'
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

result. The convention adjourned to meet
at another place at another time. wish
I could recall the name of the chairman.
I think he was a Durham man. Be that
as it may, he inadvertently nominated
Phil.
It seems that in some interlocutory pro-
ceeding the Thompson men got tactical
victory. and the auditorium ran riot and
the chairman was in rage and raped
for order without avail Then he sat
down and said: damn you, yell till you
get your fillf''
They took up the word "fill' and made
1t Phil and on the next ballot Phil
was nominated for a seat in the Forty
sixth Congress and was seated.
And what Congress it wasl It was
the ablest I ever saw on Capitol Hill,
and I have known all of its successors.
Besides. I am proud to say the Ken
lucky delegation of the Forty-sixth Con-
gress, numbers considered, was the ablest
set of the lot. And that I'll maintain.
1 take them by districts. Oscar Tur-
ner from Gibraltar. He was of that de-
scription that Alexander Stephens gave
us of the cream of statesmanship. James
A Mckenzie, the most delicious COM
panion and the most accomplished orator
you ever saw, the immediate successor
of John Young Brown. John w. Cald-
well, the knightliest man of them all.
He was as able as he was guileless, and
the best loved man of a delegation that
contained Jim Mckenzie and Phil Thomp-
son. Proctor Knott was from the Fourth
district, an even greater lawyer than he
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

her murmur with smothered breath, my
hero, my lover--O, Charley"
Another wave of sorrow was yet to
crash over our homes. On that terrific
End day of July. 1868, grandfather was
wounded at Gettysburg mo man with
wound like that can live twenty-four
hours. said the surgeon. But he did
not know the wounded man. He lived
through the retreat from Gettysburg to
the Virginia side of the Potomac, and
after resting a while at Leesburg, he was
sent home. where he lived ten days. Just
before dying he muttered: Cemetery
Ridge" Charger Hold the flagr'
In the family burial lot they were all
three laid away to rest, for the bodies
Of Charley and Mortimer were recovered.
The sons lie near the body Of their mag
niflcent father, who was a Christian,
Virginia gentleman and gallant sold
Ter, and what more can be said Of any
one?
The little family cemetery is not far
from the house and in full view from the
side piazza; we could not avoid, there
fore, sometimes seeing the lonely figure
Of a tall, slender woman coming from the
direction of the Carter plantation to-
wards our little Gods Acre. We all I'M
derstood 1t, and were careful to go into
the house whenever we saw the figure
approaching the burial place. For years
ana years 1reSn mowers were kept on
Charley's grave, but there was never
an allusion to it. There are some things
too sacred for words.
The three grave are now marked by
marble. Over the graves of my unc1es
the headstones are graceful yet dignified;
but where the dust of our family prince
Rupurt" lies there rises marble shaft,
twenty-five feet high. and craven upon 1t
are-well, I shall not quote the lines,
for you, who did not know him, would
hardly believe the things that grand
mother charged them to carve there;
and yet, there's not an elderly person In
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

their little nephews, nieces, cousins, or
neighbors and kindly volunteer to see
the little ones through the menagerte and
the circus.
Fourthly: A manifest Improvement took
place in the financial condition Of the
community. Many people who for long
time had been anxious to pay that little
bil'' at the bakers, or the grocers, nay,
several church members, who had been
earnestly DESTROYS of paying their church
dues were seen In their holiday clothing
paying car fare and riding to the circus.
OF course, this cost money and as they
had no money last week when the
baker called for his bin, and as they
did have money on the day of the cir
Gus, certainly their financial status was
improved
Filthy: The circus was help to that
maligned class, the grog-sellers. Every
body who is familiar with English liter
ature knows that this class of people
have been prosecuted from time imme-
mortal Even In the 18th century, when
Temperance had not been invented in
England, DR.. Sam Johnson poured out the
Walls Of his mighty wrath upon the ale
sellers" One Of them demonstrated
why DR.. johnson, you know must
live" mo, sir" replied the Great Bear.
II see no sort of necessity for an ale
sellers living
How far prohibition prohibits" In An
MES Town 1 do not know, and SO con-
fiicting are the statements made by repu-
table citizens on either side-"amendists'
and ''antis''--that I do not believe that
Governor Conner himself, with all the de-
tective police at his back, will ever find
out. But both amendists and ants agree
that there are blind tigers here, and few
people think that these animals have any
rights that we are bound to respect. AS
long as the grog-shop was licensed in
stitution conservative people stood by
it. except when too drunk to stand, and
then they fell by it,
Now, Burns defended the thieving
mouse in lines which will live as long as
the English tongue Is read and the poets
argument is that the mouse must live"
Can not the blind tiger enter the same
plea. And If he must live" who will
say that it is not good to encourage
him? And who doubts that the circus
brought him many customer on the
day of the exhibition?
OF course, an ili-natured man who dis
likes the circus can contrive TO say q
good deal against it, but 1t Is not my
purpose to debate with the ants, and SO
/ prefer to rest my argument" here.
still insisting that ther4 is a right side
OF the oircus"-namely the. outside.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

the county who would not say, "he de-
served every syllable of praise and as
much again.
THE SERVANTS.
Nearly all the servants of the neighbor-
hood were gone. Mistaken notions of
liberty excited them to follow the north
ern army to-they knew not whittier.
Early In the war young ''likely" negro
belonging to the Towards suddenly dis
appeared. Search was made for him
without avail. In 1864 he returned to
the neighborhood clothed in, what the
servants called 1t, "a Yankee uniformb."
He created much wonder in the quar-
ters' when he related his experience as
a regularly enlisted soldier but the older
servants shook their heads, and one of
them said, "'Taint no good comm to
nobody whar fights wild de Yankees
'ginst dar' own people," His visit proved
to be unwelcome among the colored folk,
so he soon left for parts unknown
Our servants were all gone except "Un-
Gle" Henry, Sarah, Joe and old Nanny.
They We're born on the plantation and
never knew any other home, and when
other negroes invited them to join them
and go north, Uncle Henry spoke for
them all and asked. EFF we go mort who
gwine ter look arfter our people in de
big house? who gwine aer look arfter
Mistess?'
'Uncle' Henry and grandfather had
been boys together and playmates in.
young manhood, Henry was the body
servant of his young master; and when
that same young master, as Henry put
it. Jaws a-cotin' Mistess at Poplar
Grove he counted it his highest honor
to ride behind his handsome friend and
master
When the Colonel went to the war, he
took Henry with him. but he soon saw
that the faithful negro was more needed
at home than in camp or on the field of
battle so one day he said to him,
'sHenrv. go back home and take care of
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

was a humoris.. Albert Mills was from
the Fifth, and his industry was SO prodi-
gious as to make him the envy of his
fellows John G. Carlisle was from the
Sixth. then and ever the first intellect
of every crowd he came into Joe Black
burn was from the Ashland district
well loved man of that generation and OF
this. E. c. Phister was from the Ninth,
an accomplished lawyer, and Tom Tur-
ner was from the Tenth. I shall describe
him in his own words:
Mr. Speaker, I am in thorough ac-
cord and in complete alignment with all
the passions of the hour
And so he was a grand old Peveril OF
the Peak. There was no Eleventh dis
trict then.
Phil Thompson was from the Eighth
district. His was not the hammer of
Thor. It was rather the shaft of Locks
ley and went true to the mark. He was
a born.lawyer, though the bar of Ken
lucky are pretty we'll agreed that John
is better lawyer than was Phil, doubt
It, but II these boys, when they got back
from the wars. had opened a law Of
fee in louisville or Cincinnati, in Chi
cago or New York and stuck to the
court house, it would have been great
firm.
Last night my old friend, o. o. Stealey.
and l sat up and talked about Phil. I am
afraid we were unnamed enough to cry
a little. / am sure l was, and certainly
he was heart-broken. But we will see
him again. OF that 1 am sure. Else why
did we know him here? ss
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

from our pulpits and in our religious
newspapers we are coming to think It
only fair that the readers Of The Age
seeing some of the advantages that ac-
company this very popular institution. 1
am prompted to this discussion by the
fact that the circus has Just folded it's
tents like the 1rabs and as silently stolen
away from Annes Town, Ala, where l
am now writing.
And, first, on the score of health we
have much to be grateful for. A number
of excellent women, who, for many
months past have been martyrs to neu-
ralgia, rheumatism and other chronic all
ments which had dehed the skill of our
city physicians and had prevented the
good sisters from attending their beloved
church, were suddenly and mysteriously
cured of their complaints and smilingly
turned out to see the circus.
Secondly: The decided Improvement in
our peoples facilities for transportation
was quite noticeable. Church members
who had not attended their churches for
nearly year, because they had no con-
veyance. and it was too far to walk, +"
found, upon further consideration, that
they could hook up the old roam to the
milk wagon, or to the Jersey-heretofore
regarded as unsafe-and make perfect
ly safe and highly enjoyable trip to An
MES Town to see the circus.
Eociologists and other writers upon the
progress Of civilization from the time of
Buckle to our own day. tell US that a
peoples means of transportation may be
regarded as one of the best tests of their
civilization, and If this be sound doctrine,
then who will be bold enough to deny
that the circus Is great civilizing
agency? I know a pastor who, on circus
day. hired buggy and drove Is miles to
visit members of his flock, who had not
been to church for nine long months, and
he failed to see them, because they had
gone to the circus. What an admirable
commentary upon the time-honored prov
erb: Where there is will there is a
way!"
Thirdly: The circus kindled so much
hitherto latent interest in children. A
large proportion of the church members
who attended the circus here seem to
have cared little for the performance on
their own account. but they had children
who were anxious ito see the animals"
and the grown folks went ''just to crafty
the children" Some unmarried ladies of
uncertain age, who have not shown any
interest In anybody's children for a good
while back, are suddenly stricken WITH
. powerful impulse to b Of service to-
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-01-02

your mistress and the plantation, this
war will last longer than many people
think want you to pack up all the
family silver and take 1t out into the
forest or somewhere and bury it. Let
no one know of its whereabouts"
In due time Henry returned to East
wood. The silver was gotten out for
him at night, and long before day
break Henry had taken it In buggy
for burial. None of us knew where 1t
had been deposited until long after the
war.
AS to dear old Nanny, she was an
ebonized queenl She was coal-black,
rather stout, and while always in good
humor was very dignifed. She owned
the whole plantation, white people and
all; and so much was she loved, that,
her proprietary right in everything was
never questioned. Nanny was scrup-
ulously clean, herself, and had a passion
for general cleanliness around her. She
was q colored Lord Chesterfield in skirts.
Her curtsy was a thing of art, SO beau
tiful so simple and SO unaffected. She
would give the children lessons in de-
pertinent and show how to shake hams
jes like rnarster do;" or to bow like
real ginia lady do"
Nanny was always a refuge for the
children. binding up any little scratch
and soothing hurt feelings. She would
reprove the children herself, but If any
one else did so. she became their de-
fender at once. often saying, Desc
chilun done wrong? Nav, sir, yo' amt
know 'em; dey is de fines GINA quality
folks and de Bible say, Job such is de
kingdom OBJ heaben."
Old Nanny lived until 1868. Before
she died she turned TO her mistress, who
had been at her bedside for days and
nights. and with feeble voice, said, Mis-
tess. OIL nanny gwine up de long road
to de sperit lam an won't come back
no mo-; done hab' happy life an one
thing kin glib OF nanny happy death;