The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-12-11


this land exist =
To nobody second I'm certainly reekoned
true philanthropist
! Is II my very humane endeavor to BRING
10 some extent
| Ny grand old party, more hale and
hearty, back to its usual bent
| My smile Is still serene.
AS plainly may be seen
| No matter how they may jump the track
and batter the old machine.
| For ! am quite content
! To do the work that's meant
! For a big American President-Amertcan
President
Chorus: His smile is stin serene. SC
The prosy and dun Congressional takers
! / heed with the greatest care
/ hear each Grafton without consterna-
uon. although they're hard to bear.
| When they seek the White House and
ask for pie, 1 viii treat them fine as
| silk
If the pastry's shy. there's Pauline scar
by. who win give them glass OF
milk
The man who's teeming with information
ON all things meath the sun
To Norton I send him. advice TO extend
| him on how the place should be run.
| The bold standpatter, likewise the pro
gressiVe, who comes 10 pay call
| idkeWiSe The inSuTgent. so eagerly Ut
| gent, ! welcome them, one and all.
| Ny smile Is stu serene,
| As plainly may be seen.
| No matter how they jump the track and
batter the old machine
| For / am quite content
| To do the work that's meant
For big American Observation-Disclosures
/ President
1t was this song which gave the Presi-
dent the text for his delightful talk Ia
the members OF the club aid their guests
"a talk which was thoroughly in har-
mony with the spirit OF the evening.
Hiss Democracy Appears on scene
Miss Democracy was resurrected for
/ fair at the dinner last night For mo-
ment or two the lights were extinguish-
ed and when they were switched on
again there was revealed the rear end
OF a band wagon. with Miss Democracy
| standing alongside. quite triumphant II
was big. husky Miss Democracy, with
muscles like a prize lighters and deep
bass voice that could be heard Ike the
fog horn at Sandy Hook
You do not look like the Miss De-
mocracy We have seen pictured for SO
many years, remarked the president OF
the club,
You bet I don't,' was the stentorian
reply. Pm no simpering old maid. I'm
militant. I am. I'm the original Fanny
FRAGILE I beat them 10 it,"
What are you doing hereT''
I'm taking a joy ride in this band
wagon for the first time in sixteen years
and say. I've got it chartered for quite
a speIl-'
The first person who announced his in
tention TO ride upon the band wagon
was a club member labeled Harmon. -
Where's your ticket for a ride on this
band wagon asked Miss Democracy
"Tioket?' was the reply. II am the
ticket. I'm the friend OF the masses. and
the classes are friends Of mine. I get
them going and coming. am the logi-
cal candidate"
Not yet my friend. exclaimed Miss
/ DemocTacr. You had Republican
| legislature in your first term as governor
and could blame them for not carrying
out yoJr recommendation. Wait for
two years, until we see what YOU do
with a Democratic legislature. Get orr.
] Ou bAnG Wagon
Then came the living image Of Coy
elect Dix, Of New York. His ticker
O. KID by Charles f. Murphy, was de-
cided not 10 be sufficient.
ANY other reason why YOU should
ride?" he was asked.
Sure" was the reply. II own wall
paper trust and ran on down-wfth-the.
trust platform"
! What does that prove 20
1T proves my versatility
/ My SON." said Miss Democracy. ouitp
solemniy. Il want TO tel you that the
| trouble with the Democratic marty for
! the past twenty-five years is that il has
been too id versatile. Get on.
Judge Simeon f. Baldwin. of Con-
necticut," was bawled out swiftly. even
though he threatened suit for Islander
and asserted that he was a great LesaI
! light. What has law got TO do with the
! Democratic party?" asked Miss Democ-
racy THE Republican party made all
the laws and We are going TO make new
| ones." Equally short shrift was made
| Of Gov. elect .Foss," who announced that
| 'butting In is my business" Then came
DIT. Woodrow Wilson, of New jersey. -
who claimed 10 be the only man fitted
to be the National Voice. This Ma
honal Voice business is played out. "
commented Miss Democracy. what we
want is a National Silence"
Following 'Dr. Wilson came club
member wearing long whiskers.
4 Won xxyurtffr.-
asked Miss Democracy.
Want anything was the Indignant
query I am John W. Kern of Indi-
/ ana, and there hasn't been a time IN the
last forty years that didn't want some
thing"
Wall Street Runs the Band Wagon.
/ But Mr.. Kern was toid to get off tho
hand wagon, and so was Joseph W.
Folk of Missouri" although the latter
claimed to have the Endorsement of
| William Jennings Bryan. Even the lat
/ ter, when he appeared in the person of
! a club member. was not allowed to climb
aboard Amid the elamor of all the
would-be JOY riders entered the inner
sonatlon Of Wall street.
Whats all this disturbance?' he
asked You remind me Of Jim Hin
talking about business conditions"
I am trying TO decide upon the Demo
crst 70 r1de on the band wagon with
you said Miss Democracy.
YOU exclaimed Wall Street in sur
prise
les, why not?
Because" said Wall Street as he