The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1910-02-18
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Is she good at pyrography?" you
0et, especially her apple pies" BAL
timore American.
rave you read Dobbley's last
poems! Il hope so, but l am afraid
not. -Harper's Weekly.
Binks Gin 191O)-What kind of
funeral did Howard have? Jinks-A
mile OF aeroplanes.-Life.
Hired Man-Shooting at air ships?
Farmer-Yep; trying to bring down
sumpin' to trim Mirandy's hat.-Puck.
Drop in on us, any time," says one
aviator to. another. You'll always
md the skylight OPEN Cleveland
Leader.
Crawford-Why does your wife want
to move? Crabshaw-She happened to
see house with two more closets in
it.-Puck.
Thompson-Suppose a man should
call you liar, what would you do?
Jones (hesitatingly) = What sized
man?-Jewish Ledger.
She-Did you tell that photographer
you didn't want your picture taken?
He-Yes. She-What did he say? He
He said he didn't blame me.
Cynicus- girl never says much,
does she? Sillicus-Why, she talks all
the time. Cynicus-That doesn't alter
dol
She-Some day l want to show you
our family tree. He docking at her
admiringly)-I should like to see 1t.
1t must be a peach.-Somerville Jour
nal.
Agnes sat playing bridge all the af-
ternoon with her back to a glorious
mountain view" yes. She is presi-
dent of our Back to Nature Club
Life.
He-We'd have won the foot ball
game If our captain hadn't lost his
head. She-Mercy! Was it so bad as
that? l heard it was only an ear
Boston Transcript.
THE time to save is when you're
young" That's all right, but fel-
low doesn't earn anything till he gets
we'll along and then it costs more to
live"-Boston Herald.
Olga (all excited over Nora's &C
count of her elopement) -How roman.
tic! But wasn't you afraid of the lad
der slipping? Nora-Oh, no! Mother
was holding fudge.
HE is suffering terribly. His teeth
are locked up tightly" Heavens, Is 1t
lockjaw?" mo, they're in safe and
he can't eat anything until he gets
them out."-St. Louis Star.
Caller-My uncle died yesterday, sir,
and l want you to officiate at the fu-
neral. Deacon Jones-But l didn't
know him. Caller-Good! You're just
the man I want.-Kansas City Jour
nal.
Jack-I was in box at the opera
last night. Tom-Were you? jack
should say l was l took two ladies'
there and then discovered that l mad
left the tickets at home.-Boston iran
script.
Katie-What a lovely ring! Matte
Isn't it. This ring was given me on
my twenty-first birthday. katle-heal'
ly? Why, how well preserved 1t Is
it's hardly a bit worn!-CleVeiano
Leader
$50 Miss Oldgirl Is married at last.
"Yes, and you should have seen her as
she came ND the aisle, made up to look
like a young BRIDE" who gave ner
away?' Her wrinkles. baltimore
American.
Pm glad you've dropped in, Mrs.
Irons," said Mrs. Lapsling, coroialy
greeting the visitor. This has Deen
a dreary day for me, and call IRON
a friend is like an Osiris in the des-
ert"-Chicago Tribune.
Count Hickoff-Ze weather IS SO
queer over here l must get my over
coat out. The Heiress-Love lucky.
Count Hickoff-In what way! Inc
Heiress- you haven't lost the
Lady Shopper am looking for
suitable present for a gentleman.
Clerk-What IS your friends occupa-
ton? Lady Shopper-He is an under
taker. Clerk-An undertaken. Let
me show you nice berry set.-Boston
Transcript.
But money doesn't always lead to
happiness" said the poor young man
who had just been handed the frigld
mitt. True rejoined the fair own
er Of the cold-storage heart; but It
often facilitates the search. Chicago
Daily News.
The two men talked for time IN
the train. Are you going TO near
Barkins' lecture to-night?' said one.
YES" returned the other. Take my
advice and don't. / hear he Is an aW-
full BORE" Il must CO." said the otn-
er. I'm Barkins." Life.
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