The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1910-03-25
DAMON AND PyTHIAS.
According to Ye Editor of the An
derson Daily Mail.-'The
Truth About the Affair."

(EQ1tOr S Note: IN the Issue OF the
News and Courier Of March II, ap-
peared an inquiry by Mr.. A. E. Evi-
son, Of Barnwell, regarding the real
history concerning Damon and Py-
thias. We are here reproducing the
real ''history" Of the story, as told
by the editor of the Anderson Daily
Mail, and trust that it will prove
satisfactory. Perhaps, Mr.. Evison
is not acquainted with our good
friend, Brot tner Carpen ntdr, if not,
this will prove a most excellent in
troduction.)
The "history" is as follows:
Pythias Was a married man in an
cient Syracuse. He went on a whiz
one night and got into an awful
scrape. He smashed a show case
in a cigar store, and ate a steak in
the cafe and wouldn't pay for it,
and raised rough house generally,
and finally wound up by trying to go
to bed in the piano at the moving
picture show. The police got him,
Of course, and the neXt morning the
Recorder, Dionysius, gave him SEN
tenee Of thirty days without the al
ternative Of fine. Now, as they
were taking the prisoners down the
street to the rock pile, Damon, one
of Pythias' neighbors, came along.
|'Hail!' cried Pythias, or words to
that effect. "Say, you've got to be
a friend. I want you to 60 to my
wife and prove an aibi for me. Tell
her the firm has sent me to Green
vile to look after some bad debts,
oor any other lie that you can think
of if it is better one, and make her
believe it. III do as much for you
some day. He would have talked
more, but the guard punched him
in the ribs and told him to gadap.
Now, about three months before this
Damon and Pythias had both been
trying to hire the same stenographer
and Pythias had won out. So, on
this beautiful, bright spring morn
ing Damon didn't do thing but go
to .Pythias' house and told just what
had happened. He told the whole
naked truth without concealing a
single thing. And about fourteen
minutes later he came hotfooting it
into the police station, minus his hat
and with his face torn and his shirt
front all blooded up, and this was
the story he told: '"Run for your
dives, you fellows. Pythias' old
u0ife, Philopena. is on. the warpath.
She is armed with a gun and ra-
.zor and hat pin, and she says she
Is coming here and clean out this
whole works. And she II come jolly
well near doing it, too, for you see
what she has done for me-" Now,
Ithe sergeant was a married man
himself. He sent an officer post
haste to the chain gang, and had Py-
thias brought back to the station
house. They took the stripes off Of
him and gave him back his clothes
and bromo setzlel, which braced
him up, and sent him to his office,
and when Philopena got there they
said they hadn't seen Pythias in
month and didn't know anything
about him. Philopena went on to
her husband IS Office, and when she
get there he was working on the
books Like all possessed. But he
wasn't napping-no, indeed. He
beat her to it and lit in and gave
her a line of talk about how he had
been called out Of town suddenly the
afternoon before, and couldn't get
her on the 'phone and had told the
boys in the Office to let her know
about it and they had forgotten it,
and he had just gotten IN and had to
stop by the Office and go over the
books becausd he ioouldn It depend
ron anybody to keep things straight,
and he was going on up to the house
in a little while for he came from
over yonder on the early train and
hadn't had any breakfast, and, oh,
dear, do sit down, -e said. When
Philopena told him what Damon had
said he was very much astonished,
and then looked sad, and he said he
did not intend to tell her, but that he
had noticed that Damon had been
acting strangely for some time, and,
really was afraid he had begun dop-
ing. Philopena believed it, or pre-
tended that she did, which always
.arnounts to the same thing. She said
she had been so worried, but it was
:a1 right now, and it was a pity he
saad to work so hard and be away
E,-cno homo So nouch. for she did miss