Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1910-01-07

Journal
Bill see man is trying to drift
across the Arctic Circle Where do
yon suppose he'll bring up? Jill--Oh.
on the lecture platform probably
Yonkers Statesman.
Would YOU marry woman who
had been divorced2" Well, | don
know good deal would depend on
what she had been doing with her ali.
mony. Chicago Record Herald.
He So your husband has given up
smoking? It requires a pretty strong
win to accomplish that She--Wen,
I'd have you understand that | have
a strong will.-New Zealand Free
Lance
The Conversationalist Ito Well
known authoress) Il am so deligh ed
to meet you--it was only the other
| day saw something of yours--al aut
, something or Other--in some paper
Sketch.
Did you have any assistance when
YOU made your appearance as SIG
err" YES" answered the amat ur
soloist. There was policeman keep
ing order in the gallery Washing
ton Star.
The Lady Fare--You can not cheat
me, my man. / haven't ridden in cats
for twenty-five years for nothing. The
! Cabby-Haven't you, mum? Well,
| you've done your best New Zealand
Free Lance.
Il was nearly killed yesterday"
What happened?" Il was having tea
In the garden when an airship passed
over with one of those didn'tknow-you
were-underneath fools In it," st.
Louis Republic,
! Mrs. Younglove John, are you
aware that you haven't kissed me for
week2 Mr. Youngloye-Y-yes, darl-
| ing. / was just waiting to see how
long 1t would take you TO notice it,
Boston Transcript
Helen" said her mother, IF YOU
are naughty you can't 80 to heaven.
! Well" said Helen, II can't expect TO
! 30 everywhere. went to Uncle Toms
| Cabin once, and TO the circus twice.
The Housekeeper
Sapleigh-Bah Jove. you know, an
idea has occurred to me- Miss
Pert OnterruptingD Pardon me- Mr..
Sapleigh, isn't that more than mere
occurrence? [ should call it an event
Boston Transcript.
| Her Enthusiastically | won the
prize In the lottery. and to-day you
come and ash me for my daughters
hand. Suit0r-Yes. you know, one bit
of good luck always brings another
Meggendorfer Blaetter
First Chauffeur You're a bum driy-
er. Second Ditto Say, what | know
about aut omobiles would fiji library
! First Chauffeur-Yes, and what you
don't know about EN- would I'LL a
m0rgue The Club-Fellow
Travelling Salesman Well Mr.. ia
bez, did you get in 10 see the Hudson
Fulton celebration? Farmer .jabez
No; didn't come nigh the place.
cause dye know, ! don't believe either
Of EN- ever reached the pole, Puck
Joynes / tell you, Singleton, you
don't know the Joys and felicities Of a
coptented married life, the happy flight
OF years, the long, restful calm Of
Singleton How long have you been
masried? Joynes--Just a month
Tit-Bits.
Il am going 10 embark in some sort
of business, and want to know wheth.
err you think there is much money In
moving pictures?' There was for a
fellow who moved half-dozen of
ours, said the fiat dweler He
charged us $l0.'-St Louis Star.
Tomorrow will be my birthday"
remarked the fair typewriter maid,
and I'm going to take day on"
HUH" sneered the bookkeeper, who
! had loved and lost, why don't you
take Eve years of as YOU did the last
time you had birthday" Chicago
Daily News
Can 1 get the silver service for the
4 fire department. inquired the young
man at the free library. The what?"
asked the girl at the desk The sill.
yer service for the fire department
the questions they ask you when you
take the silver service examinations
You know. Newark Evening News
Stubb-What's the trouble, old chap?
You look angry enough to fight. Penn
oh, I'm sizzling. 1t took me an hour
to button my wifes waist in the back.
and then told her a joke and she
laughed so much the buttons all few
open. What's the use in telling a won.
an joke, anyhow?-C Chicago News.