davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
HumOr and
Philosophy
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

NO matter how glaring the fault.
don't make the mistake OF think
ing that your dearest friend would ap-
preciate having IL pointed out TO him
Indigestion is one OF the most pow
erful painters in deep blue designs ex-
tant
Keeping company with Satan calls
for an asbestus suit with insulated
copper trimmings.
1t is wonderful how some persons In
the teeth Of jolt upon Jolt preserve
their self conceit
Being able to make good with any
old excuse may. be regarded as q man'S-
certificate In diplomacy.
We would doubtless be WiIlng %
listen to reason II reason had anyway
Of making herself heard
Who shan say that man is-not Aatn-
rally adaptable. seeing that he plays
the fool 20 easily and wen7
II you take care ofyourseif Il some
times happens that your neiehbor 5uSt
has to take care Of himself
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver
Tablets assist nature IN driving all
impurities out of the system. insur-
ing a free and regular condition and
restoring the organs of the body to
health and strength. Sold by all
druggists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

William Howard Taft, Joseph G.
Cannon and Nelson Aldrfch have by
this time concluded that their recon-
mendation of the tariff bill is much
like the average recommendation
easy way to get rid Of an importunate
friend. but OF little effect with the man
to whom It Is addressed.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

La FolIette says that Wickersham
acted like trust hireling in dismiss
ing the New England railroad merger
suit But why should Wicl1ersham be
expected to make an exception in this
case?
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

Diarrhoea should be cured without
loss of time and by a medicine which
like Chamberlain's Collie, Cholera
and Diarrhoea Remedy not only
cures promptly but produces no I'M
pleasant after effects. 1t never fails
and is pleasant and safe to take. Sold
by all druggists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
April Is in American
History

1731-William Williams, "signer" fol
Connecticut, soldier, ETC., born; died
1911.
1775-Paul Revere's famous ride out
of Boston to arouse the colonial
patriots.
1S47-Battle of Cerro Gordo, Mexico
General Winfield Scott defeated
General Antonio Lopez de Santa
Anna.
1906-Earthquake at San Francisco
and vicinity. Many buildings In
the city reduced to ruins, which
later took fire. Tremor recorded
as far east as Albany, N. Y.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

1880 - ~ ~ 1AO1 80
years while passing
through the Change
of Life and was
hardly able to be
around. After TAX
ing six bottles of
Lydia E. Pinkham's
V e &c t table Com
pound / gained 20
pounds, am now
able to do my own
W ork and fe ell
well."- Mrs. Ed.
LA DoU, Park Rap
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Dead Mans Accounts Short.

Kans as City, Mo, April 1s.-That
William ]. Baehr, formerly city treas
urer, who died recently, was short in
his accounts sea, 4sO was reported to
the mayor by firm of accountants.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Do not let the census
man pass you by.

See that the census enumerator gets
the whole family
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Your tongue Is coated.
Yonr breath Il fnnl-

Headaches come and go.
These symptoms show that your
stomach is the trouble. To remove
the cause is the first thing and Cham
berlain's Stomach and Liver Tablets
will do that. Easy to take and most
effective. Sold by all druggists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Moment Of RIiaa.

Moment Of Bliss.
oh, what a sight Il is 70 see
And how IL rests the eyes
And makes Imagination run
Exaltant TO the skies
When Mary fixes up her tray
From kettle. pan and pot
And comes in with tho evening meal
Well cooked and piping hotl
You bet / sit up then and take
An interest IN AFFAIRS
And In the distant background put
My troubles and my cares.
Her form is plump. her face Is fair.
Her smile is kind and sweet.
But better still that meets my gaze
Is what she brings 20 eat
watch her movements as she sets
Tho dishes all I'm place
And notice that her every act
Is full OF life and grace.
And, oh, my admiration grows
AS in her hands I spy
The very dishes that / like,
Backed up by homemade piei
We like-at least own do
A pretty girl and bright
Her every look and motion adds
To our supreme delight.
But for our permanent regard
Unwavering and strong
We must admit q lot depends
On what she brings along.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

Some day a genius VIII invent a
Pullman car without any upper berths.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Didn't Plug the KsyksIs.

Didn't Plug the keyheIs.
''Mabel, did j see that young man
kissing you last night?'
mo, papa"
81 thought did"
'1 don't think so. We looked very
carefully first to see that no one was
In sight"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

AS its contribution to the coming
harvest congress will raise the Maine
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

The Test.
"She has a beautiful complexion.
hasn't she?'
Eyes: guaranteed"
Guaranteed?
Eyes; to turn rosy on the receipt OF
a compliment"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Where He Was Strong.

Where He Was Strong.
~Can't you find work.
"Oh, yes There is plenty Of that,
but not in the line in which l am beSt
qualified"
What can you do bestT'
Help Mr.. Rockefeller give his mon
ey away"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
a Hint

Landlord, you ought to paint those
radiators white"
"For artistic effectT'
mo. When one is in the arctic re-
gions it IS pleasant TO have the sur
roundings look natural"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

ny puDilC SENTIMENT. he talked or the
antitrust law as the shield which had
been created TO protect the public
against further oppression by trusts
and combinations of all sorts. and then
proceeded to show how the pending
bill purposes to destroy that protec-
ton and to give the railroads unre-
stricted power to resume their oppres-
sive methods.
IF We are not WISE" warned the
Minnesota senator, ''if we are no wiser
than the French were in the days of
Louis XIV and Louis XVI and allow
these trusts and monopolies to grow
and go on untramme1ed the day will
comet will not be in our day, but
the day will come--when the Ameri-
can people will resort TO a revolution
as the people of France had to do, but
it will be a peaceful REVOLUTIONARY
American revolution-not as violent
and repulsive as the French. but as
thorough and effective In its results
"Mr. President, I am very mucn
obliged to senators for listening to me
without interruptlHg me. My opinion
Of this bill as it came here from the
committee in the first instance is thai
in essence its chief aim was to pro-
tect the railroads against the anti
trust law. l can come to no other con-
clusion, and being a plain, blunt man,
I can not help expressing this opinion
in this chamber and before this body"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

Many reports are being received in
Washington to the effect that the
amount of democratic sentiment that
has developed in the New England
states since the passage of the Payne
Aldrich bill is little less than astound-
ing. The following letter from a resi-
dent of Torrington, Conn, Is a sam
pie of many similar letters: Il live in
Representative E. j. Hills district and
our town generally gives Mr. Hill l.
200 to 1900 majority, it being one of
the strongest republican towns in the
district for its size. But we have Just
had our annual spring election and for
the first time in the history of the
borough the entire republican ticket
was defeated, which 1 think is a very
good sign of how the people Of Con-
necticut feel toward the Payne-Aldrich
law. 1 believe Mr.. Hill's place will be
filled by democrat if good live cam
psign Is carried out this fall"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
These DAYS.

THAT man looks like a pirate"
HE is"
what! You don't mean ftp
well. he rms meat market"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

United States Attorney General
Wicl1ersham was once more revealed
as having dropped an important suit
against corporations when Senator La
Toilette had concluded his speech
against the Taft Wickersham railroad
regulation bill. The speech was chief
ly the story of monopolisation Of trans.
portation facilities throughout New
England by the New York, New Haven
and Hartford railroad, the manipula-
ton Of state legislation to make this
monopolization possible and the final
browning achievement Of the monop-
olists In obtaining the dismissal of the
government suit begun under Roose-
veit to check the process Of merging
all the railroads, steam and electric.
The dismissal OF this suit by Attorney
General Wiokersham came three
months after he had taken office. It
was ordered by him without investi-
CATION and without explanation, except
such az does not explain at all. 1t is
being recalled that MIR. Wickersham
also dropped important suits against
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
THE ARGUS.

Published Daily and Weekly at 1s24
Second avenue. Rock Island. Ill IDn-
tered at the postoface as second-class
matterI
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
substitute For Oysters.

Substitute .For Oysters.
"How did you like the oratorr
HE is an old cannibal"
where did you get that ideaT
"He asked us 10 lend him our earn"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
Which,

'T have been driven to desperation"
"You have"
Eyes"
"What inT'
'sWhat in?"
eyes. Automobile, carriage or the
police patrolT
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

sY THE J. w. POTTER CO.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

SUFFERING
FOR YEARS
Cured by Lydia E. Pink
ham Vegetable Compound

Park RAPIDS. Minn.-"I was sick for
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

TERMS.-Daily, 10 cents per week.
Weekly. 81 per year In advance
All communications of argumentative
character, political or religious. must
have real name attached for publIca-
ton No such articles viii. be printed
over fictitious signatures.
Correspondence solicited from every
township in Rock island county.
AM6EHLa
&TRA6Esl G IsEaf( (co1NcII5 20
Monday, April 10, 1910.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18
SOME REAL LIVE
GOSSIP FROM THE CAP
ITAL OF THE NATION

CONTINUED from Page one.)
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1910-04-18

The Test.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
EQUITY MEETING

All county locals Of the American
Society Of Equity will please take
notice that the County Lodge is
hereby called to meet in Marion, Ky.
on Saturday, January, Sth., which
is the second Saturday, for the pur
pose of electing officers for the COM
ing year, and to transact any other
business that may come before the
meeting. All Locals will please
send delegates.
j. n. LAMB, President,
B. l.. WILBoRN, Secretary.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06

are dear to me, still, the serene calm
which now IS mine, enables me to
reflect upon the noble friendships
aud the "Ties that Bind, which
have been formed in the pleasant
past among those just bloomiug into
young manhood and womanhood,
(these being most lasting) and which
| expect to 60 with me to the Great
Infinite Beyond.
Yet while things are made rather
still for me at this time. the fact
that il is Christmas Time when all
should be merry making the stiffness
and the day the more beautiful, this
stiffness to me is more pleasant and
my mind rests from its daily work
with greater ease. than could posi-
bly, have fallen to nv lot among new
aud frivolous acquaintances who do
not know me and whom | do not
know.
For the beautiful sunlight stream
ing from the horizon and the birds
chirping their sweet melodies, pres
ent to the mind sweet recollections
and inspire there anew, bright hopes
for the futuer. The merry tidlngs
, Of those about us herald q greater,
grsnder, aud more triumphant day
when the Angel Of Peace shall kiss
every frown from the brow Of the
Universe, aud universal concord and
good will shall reign among men.
Beautiful twilight at set Of sun;
Beautiful goal with race we'll run. "
ANONYMOUS
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06

At 3 o'clock on the afternoon Of
Dece ember 22d., at the home Of the
BRIDE, Mr.. Orda Woodland and Miss
Tilda Curry we're united in holy
wedlock by Rev. W. T. Oakley.
The beautiful wedding was wit
messed by host Of friends Of both
the popular young people.
The groom is popular young
farmer Of Cave Spring neig hborhood,
while the lovely bride Is popular
young woman, of Iron Hill country.
They have the best wishes Of the
Record Press for a long, prosperous
and happy life.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
TuCker-Drennan.

Mr.. Claude brennan and Miss
Winnie Tucker were married at the
home of the bride on the afternoon
Of December the 22d at 2-30 O'Clock,
by Rev. W. T. Oakley, in the pres
ence of large number of relatives
and friends.
The bride is of the Shady Grove
neig ghborhood and is said to be one
of the most beautiful and lovable
young ladies in the county. The
groom is a popular young farmer, OF
Iron Hill country. The Record
Press extends best wishes to the
happy couple for life fraught with
the richest of Gods blessings.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
Money Comes In Bunches

to A. A. Chisholm, of Treadwell, N.
Y, now. His reason is well worth
reading: ''For long time suffered
from Indigestion, torpid liver, consti-
patton, nervousness and general debih-
ty," he writes II couldn't sleep had
no appetite. nor ambition. grew weak
er every day in spite of all medical
treatment. Then used Electric Bitters.
Twelve bottles restored all my old
time health and vigor. Now l can at
tend to business every day. Its med
icine." lnfallible for Stomach, Liver,
Kidneys, Blood and Nerves. SOC. at
Jas. H. Orme's and Haynes & Tylor.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06

Doan's Kidney Pills are made for
kidneys only.
Are endorsed by Marion people.
William Redd, farmer, Marion,
KY, says: al was subject to sharp
twinges through my loins when l
stopped or lifted and was also troub-
led by a pain In the small Of my
back. At night l had an acute
backache and when / rose in the
morning, I felt very lame. tired
easily, was dull and languid and at
times was very nervous. The kidney
secretions we're too frequent in pass
age and was forced to arise from
three to four times during the night
on this account. Learning Of Doan's
Kidney Pills, / procured a box at
Haynes & Tsylor's Drug Store and,
after using them about three days. l
received great relief. l continued
using them until had finished the
contents Of one box, at which time
l was cured. am pleased to give
this remedy my endorsement. ;"
For sale by all dealers. Price SO
ceats. Foster-M -Milburn Co.. Buffalo,
New York, sole agents for the Unit
ed States.
Remember the name-Dosn's-
and take no other.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
HEBRON

Old Santa Claus has visited US
aud we hope he has visited every
reader Of the Record Press.
Mr.. and Mrs. Jno. Guess, Of Tolu,
spent Christmas with her father, Mr.
z. 7 Terry.
Bud Kirk, Of Salem, has moved to
Bill Barleys house.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ebb Sullepger, Of
Sheridan, visited her parents, Mr..
aud Mrs. T. N. Bracy this week.
Harvey Clark, who has been work.
ing at Fairview mines, is spending
this week at home.
81 Franklin and family moved to
Marion Monday.
Mis- Ruth Cook, who is attending
school at Lexington, is visiting her
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. Edd Cook.
Mr.. and Mrs. Geo. Williams visi-
ted her mother, Mrs. LaRue, Of Ma
ron, first of last week.
Miss Bettye Morton, of Henderson
is spending the Christmas holidays
with her parents.
George Byarly spent Christmas
with his son jim, of Tolu.
Prof. G. +. Thomas and wife visi-
ted Edd Cooks. Sunday.
Miss Elva Roberts, the teacher Of
the Tolu school, passed through here
Friday en-rorte home.
Pof. Kee aud family, of Ripley,
Tenn. are visiting her parents, Mr..
Mrs. H. Wathen.
A Happy New Year to al the read
ers Of the Crittenden Record Press.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
McMURRAY & GRISSOM.

We are now in the Dry Goods,
Clothing, Notions, Shoes and Groce-
ry business in the |. U. o. +. build
ing on Salem street where we will
be glad to welcome our friends and
customers, and show them nice
general line of goods as can be found
in Marion or Crittenden county.
We are now just opening up. But
by the first of the New Year, will
have every thing your heart could
wish and of the freshest and cleauest
to be had any where. Do not for
get US. We want your patronage
and by good treatment and fair deal
NJ we mean to merit 1t. Come see
US and leave your orders.
Yours For Business,
MoMURRAY & GRISSOMs
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06

stock Of envelopes and paper for
this offer and will be ready to gil all
order as fast as received. No one
will be compelled to wait longer than
for the work to dry.
Come in when you come to Marion
aod leave your oider.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
EID RIDGE.
Weather ia cbapgeab

Weather is changeable in this
section.
The "candy breaking" at Curtis
Teer's was enjoyed very much on
last Wednesday night. ,
Look out for the year 1910.
Old Santa Clause visited the
Craype School Thursd ay.
Mr.. Il. Duller. of Mo, is the
guest OF friends here.
Miss Matte Clement, who has
been attending school at st Vincent,
has returned.
Newt Bressher, who has been gone
quite a while, having served out his
time In the army, is now home per-
manently.
Mr.. Wilson Travis visited W. W.
Teer Sunday.
Mrs. Susie Sullinger was the guest
Of Mrs. Grandstaff Thursday.
Miss Florence Dawson has returned
home.
Fine interest in the Sunday School
At Crayne.
Furs are bringing good prices here
this season.
Riley Rogers new house is almost
completed.
An interesting meeting is in prog
ress at Crayne.
Mrs. Ida Riley is visiting friends
in this eighborhood.
John Towery is of on a Christ
mas visit to friends and relatives,
Everett Teer was the guest of j /.
Z. Jones Sunday.
Mrs. Julia Ordway and daughter
visited Mrs. Flora Deboe last week,
Railroad hands have been laid of
for 4 time
Pert Crayne has had a very sick
child at his hume.
Miss Dixie Bipkley has been on
the sick list.
Mrs. Mary Elder visited friends at
Crayne last week.
Miss Bessie Binkley Is visiting
relatives near Francis.
Rev. l. Threlkeld has been hold
ing a meetsng at Crayne.
Mrs. Lottie Jones visited Mrs.
Celia Tabor Sunday.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
ANONYMOUS OPENS UP
ON CHRISTMAS

On this beautiful Christmas morn
ing am sitting all alone in my
study gazing from my window to the
Eastward where, in more pleasant
days than these, | recall memories of
happy houis spent with those among
whom | was wont to mingle in days
of old.
While this is not the gladdest holi.
day season of my }ife, being spent
away from home and all those that
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
GUARANTEED DANDRUF CURE

Beware OF the druggist who tells
you that any other hair tonic is just
as good as Parisiau Sage-he knows
better.
Haynes 4 Taylor are the agents
for Partisan Sage, and he won't try
to give you something just as good,
because he knows that Partisan Sage
is guaranteed to cure dandruff. stop
falling hair, and cure all diseases OF
the scalp in two weeks, or money
back.
He knows that Partisan Sage is
highly recommended as the m ost
pleasant and rejuvinating hair dress.
ing known. 1t makes the hair fiuf-
fy and beautiful. so cents a large
bottle at Haynes 4 Taylor. They
will guarantee it. Made IN America
only by Giroux Mfg. Co., Buffalo,
New York.
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
An UNUSUAL OFFER
TO SUBSCRIBERS.
Every Farmer and Citizen Should
Have His Name and Post office
Printed on His Envelopes.

Every farmer or citizen for that
matter, should have his name and
post Office printed on his envelopes
and the paper he or his family use
in their correspondence, thus avoid
ing any mistake ip a reply. On all
rural routes nearly everywhere this
custom is being practiced and ap-
proved Of. when too, il is found to
be so much cheaper than buying
PLAIN paper and envelopes by the
small quantity
Here is our proposition:
To every one subscribing or re.
newing their subscription to the
RECORD-PREss, we will give 100
envelopes and $50 sheets Of nice note
paper, with your name and address
and whatever you want to say on
both for the total sum OF $l.50.
The envelopes and paper alone
would cost sl. 90 anywhere without
the printing aud by takipg advantage
OF this offer you get the RECORD.
PRESS one year TO any address,
together with 100 nice envelopes and
$50 sheets OF paper for $l.50.
We promise as much care in pleas
Ipg you as n you werere paying fell
price. In other words We will guar
antee to please you.
We are making this low offer that
We may hold every subscriber
and secure as msuy new ones as pos.
sible. We are anxious to increase
our circulation from its already pres
cnt high mark, aud feel that this is
the best way to do it.
Now Of course you can not ge,
your work the day you subscribe aud
order il, But your name vill be en-
tered with a copy Of what you wan,
aud in a few days at the outside limit
your work will be done and done tc
please you. There is scarcely fam
lily 10 Crittenden county that will not
spend twice ibis amount in the run
Of year for paper and envelopes
without the printing.
Should there be those who want
Oslv the 100 envelopes with the
RECORD PRESS, the total cost will
be sl.25.
W .a,o o,J.rad N t,amandnous
Crittenden record-press., 1910-01-06
|LWAY MAIL
CLERKS WANTED.
Government Pays Railway Mall
Clerks $500 TO 81, 200, and Other
Employees up TO $500
Annually.

J llucle Sam will hold Spring exam
Itions throughout the country for
klway Mail Clerks, Custom House
krks. StenOgraPhers, Bo9tkeepers,
|partmental Clerks and other Gov.
bment Positions. Thousands Of
bointmeuts will be made. Any
la or woman over Is, in City or
|untry can get Instruction and free
|ormstion by writing at once to the
Ireau Of Instruction, Hamlin Bull
biz, Rochester, n. Y.