davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

living with them and trying not to QUARREL"
You have forgotten the worst of ALL"
said Clara
No, my darling, | have not forgotten it.
! have thought Of nothing else, but wanted
you to mention it"
"The fiat silver, George"
"The flat silver, my darling. Twelve
dozen, solid silver and teaset to match, bought
without consulting us, by your two rich
bachelor uncles in colluson. We wanted
Queen Anne or Louis Seize, simple, digni6ed,
something to live with and grow fond Of,
and what did we get?"
"Oh dear, they might have asked mel" "
"But they don't, they never do, that is the
theory Of wedding presents, my dear. We
got Pond Lily pattern, repousse until it
scratches your fingers. Pond Lily pattern, my
dear, which Iloathe, detest, and abominate"
Il too, George"
And that, my dear, we shall never get rid
Of; we not only must adopt and assume the
responsibility, but must pass it down to our
children and our children's children"
"Oh, George, it is terrible--terriblel
What are we going to do1"
My darling Clara, we are going to put
piece of bric-a-brae a day on the newell post,
buy litter Of puppies to chew up the rugs,
select butter-hngered, china-breaking wait
ress, pay storage on the silver and try occa-
sionally to set fire to the furniture"
"But the fat silver, George, what of that1"
"Oh, the fiat silver" ! said gloomily,
"each one has his cross to bear, that shall be
ours"
We were, as has been suggested, rela-
lively rich couple. That's a punl AT the
end OF five years relative on either side left
us a graceful reminder. The problem Of
living became merely one Of degree. AT the
end OF this period we had made considerable
progress in the building up Of home which
should be in fact and desire entirely ours.
That is, we had been extensively fortunate
in the preservation of our wedding presents.
Our twenty-second housemaid broke bottle
Of ink over the parlor rug, her tweny-one
predecessors (whom ] had particularly
selected had already made the most crafty
ing progress among the bric-a-brac, two
intelligent Airdale puppies had chewed salts
factory holes in the Art Nouveau furniture,
even the Sistine Madonna had wrenched
loose from its supports and considerably
annihilated the jcwel-studded Oriental lamp
in the general smash-up.
Our little home began at last to really
reflect something of the artistic taste on which
pride myself. There remained at length
only the flat silver and few thousand dollars
worth Of solid silver rcceptacles for which
we had now paid four hundred dollars stor-
age. But these remained, secure, fixed be-
yond the assaults of the imagination.
One morning at the breakfast table laid
down my cup with crash.
Clara gave an exclamation Of alarm.
George dear, what is it?"
For ali renly seized handful OF the Pond
Lily pattern silver and cazed at it with =
savage 10y.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

George, George, what has happened2"
My dear, have an idea-a wonderful
idea"
"What idea?"
"We win spend the summer in Lone Tree,
New Jersey"
Clara screamed
" Are you in your senses, George2"
Never more So"
"But it's broiling hotl"
Hotter than that"
1t is simply deluged with mosquitoes" /"
"There arc several mosquitoes there"
" It's a hole in the groundl"
at certainly isl
"And the only people we know there are
the Jimmy Lakes, whom 1 detest."
II can't bear them"
sand, George, there are bwglvsi"
yes, my dear" I said triumphanty,
"heaven " be praised there are burglars!"
Clara looked at me. She is very quick.
"You are thinking Of the silver"
"Of all the silver"
"But, George, can we afford itp"
"Afford what2"
"To have the silver stolen"
"Supposing there was a burglar insurance,
as a reward"
The next moment Clara was laughing in
my arms.
"Oh George, you are wonderful, brilliant
man. how did you ever think Of itP"
81 just put my mind to il" | said loftily.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

until the lamp explodcs or the pipes burst we
have got to go on and on and on living over
that, and why hy?-bccalse dear Isabel will be
here once week.
"I thought Isabel would have better
taste, said Clara
"She has--Isabel has perfect taste, depend
upon it, | said, she did it on purpossP'
"George"
Exactly that Have you noticed that
married people give the most impossible
prescnts2 1t is reyenge, my dear. Society
has preyed upon them They will prey upon
society. Wait until We get a chance"
ut is awful" said Clara
"Let US continue. We have FIVE French
rugs; no two could live together. Five rooms
desecrated Our drawing room is Art Nou-
veau, furnished by your Uncle James, who is
strong and healthy and may live twenty years
particularly abominate Art Nouyeau furni-
ture."
80 do l."
"oar dining room is distinctly Grand
Rapids"
NOW, GeOrgel
at is."
"Well, it was your Aunt Susan"
1T was, but who suggested it2 | pass
over the bedrooms. will simply say that
they are nightmares. Expensive night
marcsl | come to the lamps-how many
have we2"
Fourteen"
Fourteen atrocities, imitation Louis Seize,
bogus Oriental, ieathered, laced and tasseled.
So much for useful presents. Now for decora-
tion. We have three Sistine Madonnas
fmy particular abominaton). Two, thank
heaven, VIC can inilict on the next victims,
one We haze got to live with and why y2-so
that carh Of our three intimate friends will
believe it his own. We have water colors and
etchings which we don't want and a photo
graph copy Of every picture that everyone
sees in cveryones house Some original
friend has even sent US lifcsize, marble
reproduction OF the Venus de Milo These
things will he our artistic home Then there
nc VASES"
"Now YOU are losing your temper"
"On the contrary, I'm reserying it. |
shan't characterize the bric-a-brac, that was
10 be expected"
"Don'ti"
AAt least that is not marked come at
astto the silver Give me the list"
Clara sighed and extended it.
-Four solid silver terrapin dishes"
Marked"
Markell Terrapin-h hal hal Two mas
siyc, expensive, solid silver champagne
coolers"
Marked"
MARKED, my dear--for each end Of the
table when we give our beefsteak dinners
Almond dishes"
"Don'tlp
q l'orty-two individual, solid or 6ligree
almond dishes; forty-two, Clara"
Marked
Right again, dear One dozen bcnbor
dishes, FIVE nouveau richie sugar shakers (ws
neycrusc them), three rufiirccfs--;n 10 heavcn':
name what's fl,at2 Solid silver hre.d n dish~s
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

"My DEAR" replied, "the last time they
came in July, All the more reason that
they should change to August"
They will never come" said Clara a
second time.
"Let's bait the hook" said, trying to
turn'the subject into facetious vein. "We
nigh. s.rew dozen or 50 Of those individual
almond dishes do~n tho path to tue road :
They'll never conne." .sd clAra chxs.-
natcly.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

feelings. Never have ! Ichjoyed a a-situation
more. Itis.trile noticed as proceeded our
burglar began to edge away towards the
door, keeping the lantern steadily on my
face.
And onr favor more" added, "there are
several aocks Of individual silver almond
dishes roosiing downstairs
eF5-y-swo," said Clara. "twenty-four
IN The lining nom and sigsi.rl in the
parIor"
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

We went to Lone Tree, New Jersey. We
went there early to meet the migratory spring
burglar. We released from storage two
chests and three barrels of solid silver we'd
ding presents, took out burglar insurance
for three thousand dollars and proceeded to
decorate the dining room and parlor.
:" 1t looks rather-rather nouveau richie, +"
said Clara, surveying the result,
"My dear, say the worditis vulgar But
what OF that2 We have come here for a
purpose and we will not be baked. Our
object is 10 offer every facility to the gentle
men who will relieve us of our silver. Moth
ing concealed. nothing screwed to the
floor"
al Think" said Clara, "that the cham
pagne coolers are unnecessary"
The solid silver champagne coolers adorned
either side Of the fireplace.
GAS receptacles for potted ferns they are,
it is true, not quite in the best of taste, 2
admitted. "We might leave them in the
hall for umbrellas and canes. But then they
might be overlooked, and we must take no
chances on careless burglar"
"I'm sure the burglars will never come, "
said Clara, woman fashion.
eff there's anything viii keep them away,
said, a little provoked, its just that attitude
Of mind"
"Well, at any rate, do hope they'll be
quick about it, SO we can leave this dreadful
place"
They'll never come if you're going to
watch them," said angrily.
We had quite little quarrel on that
point.
The month Of June passed and still we re-
manned in possession OF our wedding silver.
Clara was openly discouraged and if still
clung to my faith, at the bottom ! was anxious
and impatient. When July passed unfruit-
fully even our sense Of humor was seriously
endangered.
"They will never come, " said Clara firmly
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1910-06-27

DON'T believe in wedding
functions. | don't believe in
honeymoons and particularly
Iabominatc the inhuman Gus
tom of giving wedding pres
ents, And this is why:
Clara was the fifth poor
daughter OF a rich man. |
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

E:4 American business man in
the extent to which they are
now saving time and labor by means
"f mechanical aidy and Office appli-
ances. This tendency to economize
In minutes and muscle is manifest to
a surprising and constantly increas-
Ing extent among men engaged in po-
litical, professional and even artistic
pursnits-vocations that are not com
monty supposed to quicken the quest
for maximum efficiency with mini
mum waste as does the fierce COM
petition of modern Industrial, com
nercial and mercantile life. Under
the new order of things, however. the
visitor to the office or study of the
progressive statesman, lawyer,
preacher. musician. artist. lecturer.
physician, librarian or educator may
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21
GOOD SEEDS MAKE GOOD GAR
OENS.

Seeds of the best quality are apt to
fail through improper treatment, by
sowing the seed too deep or too shall
low: in too wet or too dry soil. Seeds
differ greatly as TO temperature re-
quired for termination. Some will
terminate rapidly at certain tenn
perature. while others, if sown under
the same conditions, are apt to decay.
and for these reasons it is imperative
that great care and judgment be exer-
cised in selecting seeds, planting and
caring for your crops.
Be sure that you select your SEEDS
early to avoid possible delay in get
ting your order delivered, and also to
fortify yourself against any possible
rise in prices, which is sure to come
TO the late purchaser. Seeds for west
ern planting must be particularly
adapted to this climate, altitude and
conditions. The large seed houses.
such as the Bartcldes company OF
Denver, have experts constantly test
ing and grading their output. so as to
improve the quality wherever possible.
There is no question of doubt but that
the splendid record the Rocky Noun
tain country is making in yield per
acre is due in no small degree to the
fine quality of acclimated seeds that
are being so generally used.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

the telephone and telegraph in the transaction
of business and few ii any captains of indus
try rival Uncle Sans best-paid employees in
the extent to which they make use of the wire
less telegraph. This is but natural since
practically, all government vessels of any i'm
portance are equipped with the wireless and
the government maintains its own shore sta
tiOns for wireless work at various points on
the seacoasts and will ultimately have at
Washington a station of 5000 miles radius
that will enable communication direct with
almost any ship in the Atlantic. The federal
government parallels the precautions of the
most alert private business houses by having
its own secret codes for telegraphic communi.
cations. There are more than half dozen
Of these. The navy department and the war
department each has several codes; the state
department has one: and the president has
special secret code for his own use. These
codes are changed II suspicion is aroused on
the part of the officials that a key to a code
has fallen into alien hands.
At the White House offices there is a tele-
graph and telephone department that more
than measures up against any Of the similar
adjuncts provided at the general offices of
wealthy corporations having branches in wide
ly separated localities. The presidents intel
ligence Office" as this communicative nerve
center Is called is. first Of ALL the central" for
private branch exchange Of a telephone system
with upward of a score of stations at differ
ent points in the White House building and
grounds Similarly 1t is the hub OF system
that enables the president to talk confiden-
TALLY at any time with any of the members of
his cabinet. Finally 1t is clearing house
for long-distance telephone and telegraph
work handled by means of direct wires. Up
ward Of two dozen telegraph wires enter the
White House Offices and the expert telegra-
piers who. working in shifts. are ON duty
every minute of the "a hours enabled to
secure direct wire to any point at any time
and to reserve it for executive business as
long may be desired. These White House
telegraphers have. under stress of unusual
press of business. employed some unique ex-
pedients. Graphophones Of carefully gauged
speed have been used to record long messages
clicked of by the telegraph instruments-to
be transcribed later-and, on occasion. long.
distance telephone messages have been re-
peated word for word received to 4 graphic
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21
Giving II Away.

"A woman just can't keep secret.
he declared, opposing statement.
"Oh. I don't know" contradicted
the fluttery lady. "Ive kept my age
secret ever since | was twenty-four.
Yes" he replied. but one of these
days you will give it away. In time.
you will just simply have to tell 1t.
WELL" she replied with confidence.
81 think when woman has kept a
secret for twenty years. she comes
pretty near knowing how to keep it.
philadelphia Ledger.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

the signature, Erred W. Carpenter, oecie'aiy
TO the President" This plan OF signing CORE
snondence by proxy has also been employed
hv other high officials. notably army and navy
of,cers of high rank, who are served in this
capacity BY aids, flag lieutenants. etc.
"A phase of governmental work which has
called into reuuisition great number OF mod
ern business aids. representing a wide diver
sity of types is the issuance OF the daily and
weekly and monthly bulletins. announcements,
reports statements etc, which constantly
emanata from all government departments
and the purpose of which is to make notifica-
tion = changes in various branches of the
public service, the condition Of treasury
funds. etc. etc has lately been proposed
that Uncle Sam shall follow the example of
various foreign governments by issuing q
gazette or official daily newspaper. In which
shall be published all Of these governmental
announcements of whatsoever character, but
up to date there has been other method
than to allow each public official to make his
announcements in his own way
Some of the 7cily statements Of what
Uncle Sam is doing in various lines Of activ-
ity are now printed from metal type on ordi-
nary printing presses. just as circulars or
pamphlets are printed. but for the most part
these daily broadsides are prepared in the
office where the information originates, by
means Of some one Of those numerous new
inventions for Duplicating or reproducing
typewriter sheets. Some Of these impromptu
printing outfits in the government Offices are
operated by hand, but for the most part they
use electrical energy and this is often we'll
nigh essential. since in many instances
edition" of thousands Of copies has to be
printed within few hours. In most instances
young men set the type or prepare the wax
stencils that are necessary for this duplicat-
ing operation. and since statistics figure in
almost every one of these governmental an
nouncements extreme care is necessary to
insure accuracy.
close second to Uncle Sans printing
and duplicating equipment, both in number
and variety is the array Of governmental ap-
paratus for handling the mailing lists to be
used in sending out these various bulletins.
That the machines for mechanically address
ing envelopes and wrappers must be qualified
for rapid work may be appreciated from the
fact that some Of these government announce
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

Old-time cowboys to the number Of
seventy met in the office of Cattle In
spector Charles Hartman at Denver
and formed an association which will
-reafter hold . reunion during every
stock show in Denver. 1t will be known
As the Cowboys reunion. The only
qualification for membership is that
the applicant shall have served on
range prior to 1880 and shall be white.
Eugene Williams of Greeley is presi-
dent, Mark Beethan, vice president.
and Charles Hartmann, secretary and
NeaSurer.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21
New Works Literary Girls.

The young man who said he'd never eaten
any, to somebody who asked him II he liked
Troope. was outdone the other day in a Fifth
avenue book store A girl of II came in and
asked the clerk for "Prometheus" by man
named Kelly or Sheets. something like
that"
oh said the clerk. "Shelley's Prone
theus Unbound'?'
Yes replied the girl. that's it. But II
you please. I'd rather have 1t bound It's SO
easy to lose the pages. you know. il It isnt"
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

u HE public men OF the nation
are little, il any. behind the
\ proyerbially resource efu
- American business man in
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

Dor and material in the discharge of his busi-
ness that would not be tolerated in any pri-
vate business.
Naturally some sections of the government
tai machine are much more advanced than
others in their adoption Of business aids and
office appliances. For instance there is the
forest service, which under the direction Of
that human dynamo. Clifford Pinchot is the
peer Of any private business establishment in
the country In point of record keeping. ad-
ADMINISTRATION and celerity in the dispatch Of
business. Some institutions under the gov
vrnment are yet a long way behind this prize
example in the matter of ONCE equipment. but
the point is that practically all Of them have
made a beginning in the right direction. With
business men and corporation lawyers being
drafted, as a matter of course for cabinet
posts and the most important responsible po-
sitions under the government. there is every
reason to expect that mechanical assistants
will continue to make their appearance in in
creasing numbers aids in the discharge of
the ever-increasing volume of government
business.
The presidential business establishment.
for all that a certain dignity must be main
tained in all procedure, Is thoroughly up to
date both in methods and equipment. The
rule tand 1t is by no means dead letter.
that every communication shall be answered
on the same day on which it is received might
be adopted Win advantage Dy many private
business establishments that do business with
far more s1ss and fluster than the White
House. word should be said in favor Of the
White House system of securing the mail at
frequent intervals during the day by special
messenger and having ~, incoming letters
opened by one man. who sorts the communica-
tions and so distributes them among the office
force as to insure speedy response. The
White House uses approved card index sys-
tens for considerable portion Of its record
keeping and for its very Important mailing
lists" including those Of social nature. car
rying thousands of names and addresses WHICH
are used in sending out invitations for the
card receptions and other functions at the
presidential mansion. Incidentally 1t may be
mentioned that the card index and its next of
6n the vertical file installation now in
practically universal use in the government
o1Aces at Washingtonl and no factors have
III ,ed more to simplify the whole routine of
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21
Quantity, Not Quality,

Teacher-Willie. have you whis-
pered today without permission?
Willie-Yes, ma'am. wunst.
Teacher-Johnnie, should Willie
have said "Wunst'?
Johnnie ttrImphan'ly) - No.
ma'am; he should have said 'twict.' y
brooklyn Life.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21
Bobby Stands Reproved.

Little Bobby's Ma-Josiah. Bobby
has been using slang again today.
Little Bobbys Pa-Now. see here.
kid. You've got to cut it out! | won't
stand for it. See?-Brownings Maga-
zine.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

tenSlNe employ Ogln'nt. Many pliiCidls
now talk into Photographs all their
replies to correspondence and even
reports and public addresses pre-
pared in advance. thus effecting
clear saving of all that portion of the
stenographer's time that would, un-
der the old plan. be devoted to the
taking of dictation One OF the most
interesting exemplfications of the ad-
vantages to be derived from the use
Of this invention is found In the EN-
ployment of the phonograph In the
reporting of the debates of the senate
and house of representatives. The
expert stenographers who in the roles
Of official reporters make the short.
hand record of proceedings on the
floor of each legislative chamber save
much time by simply reading their
notes to monographs and then going
back to their duties on the floor.
leaving the record to be transcribed
by typewriter onerators.
The fountain pen. one Of the most
familiar of time-savers. is held In
high esteem by every member OF the
presidents cabinet and will probably
continue to be SO long as custom de-
crees that the head of each govern
ment department must sign in auto
graph every letter dispatched from
his office-a volume of correspon-
dence that reaches hundreds, mayhap
as much as thousand letters a day.
Signatures in typewriting or by auto
graph rubber stamp. such as are so
common In the business world sSe
strictly tabooed in the higher ofli-
cial circles. The president escapes
this ordeal because of the fact that
the great preponderance of the mail
sent out from the White House bears
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

A man who is serving life SEN
tence in an Ohio prison has written
book-probably to demonstrate the
power of the pen.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

ments are sent to more than 10000 ad
dresses in all parts OF the tniter
States In one government Office where
envelopes are addressed by means o.
chain apparatus. employing links ir
which the necessary type Is held. {
young man devotes his entire time Il
setting up new addresses in the NOV
able rubber tyne as names are addict
TO the mailing list. and in making cor
rections OF street addresses, etc. ir
the addresses already in type. Not
only are envelopes mechanically ad
dressed to Uncle Sans regular CORE
spondents. but said envelopes. afteI
their destined contents are in place
are sealed by electrically operated en-
velope sealing machines, each of which
does the work Of dozen men. Oui
public men. II they used postage stamps
on their official correspondence. would
undoubtedly follow the example of pri
yate business houses in utilizing me
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

"A SQUARE LOOK INTO eTeR-
NiTY." An astounding book. To tho
point. BY mail $1.0o. J. c. Jensen
4o5 Charles Block, Denver, Colo.
The Julesburg grit-advocate., 1910-01-21

phone to be transmitted later to the president.
This scheme has been found very convenient
when other duties prevented the president
from listening to the long distance conyersa-
tion as it came over the wire
Speaking Of the use Of the talking machine
in governmental practice, it may be added
that in all branches OF the federal establish
ment the business phonoEraph is finding ex