The Holbrook news., 1910-06-24
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 where my wife can't find it."-Cleve-
 land Plain Dealer
 How Tillie's clothes hang about
 her! Why. they don't fit at all" But think how much worse she would look
 if they did."-Life
 Considerations, What long legs the new waiter hasi Host-Yes, en- gagged him specially for the diners who are in a hurry.-Meggendor Blatter.
 Miss Kidder-S'sh, Carrie has dyed
 her hair black. Don't tell anybody. Miss Askitt-Is 1t a secret? Miss Kid der-Yes; she wants to keep it dark. Boston Globe.
 What part of the railway train do you regard as the most dangerous?" inquired the nervous man. The din ing car," answered the dyspeptic- Washington Star
 I'll be ready in a minute" she said to her husband. You needn't hurry, now he called up some time later. T find that I shall have to shave again. Detroit Free Press
 q thought you said you told your wife everything you did" 'I do" Its mighty strange. She hasn't said a word to my wife about the s1O you borrowed from me. e."-Washington Star.
 Patience-They say she got all her furniture on the installment plan? Patrice-She did She has had four husbands, and she got a little furnf- ture with each one.-Yonkers States man.
 She-Don't you think woman's sui frage would be a fine thing? He-I know I could always persuade my wife to vote as I wanted by telling her I intended voting the other way-Bos- ton Globe.
 Why can't that prima donna sing more than twice a week?" q don't know" answered the impresario, 'ul- less it's because she tired out her vocal cords arguing with me about salary" Washington Star.
 Maud-So he had the cheek to ask my age, did he? We'll, what did you tell him? Ethel-I told him I didn't know positively, but I thought you were twenty-four on your thirtieth birthday Transcript
 Now, your conduct during the trial may have considerable effect on the jury "Ah, quite SOL responded the ultra-sweil defendant And should I appear interested or just smiIdly bored ?"-Kansas City Journal.
 You say you have quit smoking?" ''Yes, never going to smoke again." '"Fhen why don't you throw away those cigars?" Never, I threw away a box of good cigars the last time quit smoking and it taught me les son.
 ''The way to run this country" said the egotist, "is to put thoroughly wise. capable, alert. and honest men in con trol of affairs" Yes" answered Miss Cayenne, but what are we going to do? There's only one of ou."-Wash- ington Star
 Cholly-The deuce, old chap; cawnt go to the party. I have no col lah button. Reggie-Go across the street and buy some, deah fellow. Cholly-But I caawnt. Nobody has my except my tailah. don't 
 Mr. Dubbs (with a newspaper)- It tells here, my dear, how a pro- yressive New York woman makes her social calls by telephone. Mrs. Dubbs Huh, Shes probably ike me-not a decent thing to wear Boston Transcript.
 In written examination on astron- of HXEblf happens when there is an eclipse q he moon?" A student with rather ,ood knack of getting out of a difd- .ulty wrote: "A great many people .ome out to look at it"
 Whats that party kicking a5out?" aid one New Yorker. "Oh, ne's one if those guys who are lucky and don't now it." replied the other. He came lere on a round-trip ticket from Phil delphia and lost the return coupon" Washington Evening Star.
 '.Pm sure," said the interviewer, the public would be interested to now the secret of your success" We'll, young man." replied the cap ain of industry, ''the secret of my uccess has been my ability to keep it
 secret t.'-Sacred Heart Review.
 "Td hate to be millionaire. Gosh, Why?' Well. miliionaires re always getting letters threatening hem with all sorts of horrible fates nless they immediately pay the writ IS large sums of money" That's othing. I get just such letters on ne first of every month. h.'-Cleyeland eader.
 why" asked the judge. do you mink your husband is dead? You ay you haven't heard from him for lore than a year. Do you consider lat reasonable proof that he has assed out of existence?" Yes. your onor. If he was still alive he'd be