davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11
When Curates Were Wanted.

When one learns that CurateS are in
creasing SO much more rapidly than
beuetices, wonder is excited as to the
condition of affairs in the eighteenth
century. when euterprising ladies Of
fered iivings TO clergymen willing to
marry them. An advertisement to this
effect appeared in the London ChrOn-
icle in March. 175S. The lady was
rather particular too. The curate was
to be young. have small fortune. be
well recommended as to morals and
good temper and be firmly attached
to the present happy establishment"
The living was not rich-below fl00
per annum-but the fair one was young
and agreeable. There seems q touch
of humility in the direction that an
swers may be left at the bar of the
Union Coffee House, Strand. directed
to z. T." Confidence was created by
the assurance that the utmost Sc
crecy and honor may be depended
upon."-London Chronicle.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11
Don't Be Too Familiar,

"Abusin' yoh bad luck" said Uncle
Eben, ''is li'ble to git it so tame dat
it'll follow you aroun' like a yaller
dog."-Washington Star.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11

BIll-When all the fools are dead
don't want to be alive. Jill-Well.
don't worry; you won't be.-Yonkers
Statesman.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11
Close Quarters.

Bensonhurst-Does your wife find
fault with the size of the fat?
Yorkville-There isn't room for CON-
plaint. Smart Set.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11
His Wav Of Puttino IL.

Sillicus-Do you believe there is
honor among thieves? Cynicus-No;
they are just as bad as other people,
Philadelphia Record.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1910-02-11
Revised.

Don't you walk into my parlor."
Said the spider to the fly,
For you might give me typhoid.
And I'd very likely die."
Houston Post.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
How to Enter the Office.

Advance to the inner door and give
three raps. The devil will attend to
the alarm. You will give your rame.
postofiice address and number Of years
you owe for the paper. You will be
admitted into the sanctum and will ad-
vance to the center of the room, where
you will address the editor with the
following countersign: Hold the right
hand about two feet from the body,
with the thumb and fingers clasping a
ten dollar bill. which you will drop
into the editors hand. saying. Were
you waiting for meT' The editor will
grasp your hand and the bill, pressing
1t, and will say. You betT-Thayel
nlSN District
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
No Wonder.

The ancients thought the world was nat:
I'm really not surprised at that:
We'd ind II fat, dare to say.
II we were living in their day.
Just think. they had no autos then,
No show girls to delight the men.
No pipes 20 smoke and no cigars.
No cocktails served at handsome bars,
No bridge to play and no pink teas.
No liners speeding Ger the seas.
no yellow journals and no fats.
No women's monstrous picture hats.
No tariff problem to attack.
No gowns that button UP the back.
No end seat hogs with manners rude,
No monkeying with the price of food.
No ice bills. no cold storage eggs;
No bunko steerers and no yeggs.
No trolley cars with clang and whir,
No Teddy to keep things astir-
Say, is II any wonder that
The ancients thought the world was fat
Vancouver Province
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
LAWYERS in GERMANY.
They Cannot Advertise, and Their Fees
Are Fixed by Law.

They Cannot Advertise, and Their Fees
Are Fixed by Law.
The German law fixes the exact fees |
which q German attorney has to claim
for all kinds of professional work. and
the rechtsanwalt can charge neither
more nor less
These fees apply to all matters OF
the civil code and Of criminal cases
The amount, according to the Green
Bag, depends exclusively on the value
of the object Of contention.
It II an old though still unfulnlled
wish of German lawyers to have
new fixed list of fees, not made after
the old and low standard of the year
1870, but made with consideration to
the changes-the numerous decided
changes-which have taken place since
that year.
The rechtsanwalt is attorney and
counselor at law all In one Tin England
solicitor and bar-ister). The rechtsan-
walt can never be a business man. as
is the case In the United States.
The exercise of the law Is not to be
considered a calling OF profession, but
Is to be looked on more as public
office. According to the lawyers code
OF the LIST OF July, 1878, lawyer Is
charged publicly with certain duties.
He is obliged to have his residence
in the town or district where he Is ap-
pointed $50 called residence duty.
Further, he must conduct himself 10
and out of Office in a way BETTING his
professional and social standing-i. e.
: duty due to his rank. Thus lawyel
Is forbidden to advertise In newspa
E pers, by canvassing, etc. or to bu,
i or take over a practice already mad
= as being unworthy of his calling
! His position in society is between
y officials and scholars, and through Gus
3 tom and law he is compelled to keel
z the position to the last degree. Thi
r compulsion to keep ones rank ha
n given rise to the existence of CON
q mittees called embellishments, who's
duty 1t is to keep strict watch tina
L no lawyer dishonors his calling. Thes
lie committees have a strict code Of pun
lie ishment, ranging to complete expu
~ sion from Office. In this way the Law
y yers In Germany have a good and hol
Is ored position. In fact there Is scarce
Is a country In which the lawyer enjo,
ID more respect and confidence.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Test of Greatness.

When Elliston went from London TO
his own theater at Birmingham he
was known to scarcely a member OF
his own company. On reprimanding
one of them sharply the irate actor
threatened to kick him OFF the stage.
He rushed TO the stage manager and
asked who that man was.
"Mr. A." said the manager.
"a great man, very great man.
said Elliston. He threatened TO Kick
me. the lessee OF Drury Lane. Such
man as that must go to London. he
mustn't waste his energies here" And
he engaged the actor on the spot fol
Drury Lane.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
TASMANIA.
Mechanics Applied to the Ono Time
Convict Settlement.


Tasmania is perhaps the most inter
esting Of the states OF our common
wealth" remarked the Australian. at
is large triangular island lying to the
south Of Melbourne and was once a
convict settlement.
1.-THE climate is delightful and the
soil remarkably fertile. The island is
practically one large orchard, where
peaches, apples. cherries, etc, are
grown IN sufficient quantities to keep
the adjoining continent supplied, with
some, left over for export to England
AS frN't trees do not require much
tending, leisure is notable character
istic Of the inhabitants, and Tasmania
is known throughout the antipodes as
the land OF lots Of time or the land OF
sleep a lot 1t is also called the jam
country and its natives Familiarity
termed jam eaters This is on account
OF the presence OF an enormous can
merry in the island. where some OF the
orchard products are converted into
Jams, jellies and preserved fruits.
But this by no means ends the list
of Tasmanian nicknames. Two Dutch
e1plorers-Tasman and Van Dieman-
had to do with the discovery Of the
island, and, although the name Of Tas
man is now used. it is often referred
to In old school books as Van Dieman'i
Land. We find 1t amusing TO twis
the latter name a bit and call the Tas
manians demons which is a shame
as they are the mildest and best fel
loxrs fD tho world They SDaak q
themselves as 'Tasies,' and that ma,
be accepted as their unofficial designs
on."-New York Press.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
A RUNAWAY HORSE.
impossible For Him to Take the Bit
Between His Teeth.

impossible For Him to Take the Bit
Between His Teeth.
The runaway horse in story books.
a. in most OF the veracious and detail
ed accounts given I'm the daily press,
invariably takes the bit between his
teeth" as a preliminary measure. 1t
would be interesting to know how he
does this. He obviously cannot get 1t
between his molar teeth (grinders) un-
less both his cheeks are slit up from
the corners of his mouth. and II the
cheek straps be the right length 1t Is
equally impossible for him to get 1t
down to the level OF his incisors IMP
pers), and there are no teeth In be-
tween! Thus perishes another hoary
headed superstition.
What does happen Is that through
steady, unremitting tension on the
reins the bars OF his mouth become
numbed and impervious to pain. This
enables him to set his jaw firmly. put
the whole weight OF his head on the
bit and successfully resist anything
short OF one horsepower at the other
end of the reins. This Is the reason
why when run away with one should
ne, er try to recover control by steady
pulling. but should always use short
sharp pulls with intervals of complete
-Slaxot ton between them.
Although 1t is always advisable tC
drive a new horse, temporarily at least
with the bit to which he has been &C
customed, provided that he goes salts
factorily In 1t. 1t is never safe to as
sumo that 1t Is the best possible on
for him. This assumption, which i
general. is responsible for much trou
BILE that might be obviated. 1t is SUI
prising to note how complete and rad
zeal a change Of bit may be made, no
only with impunity. but with advei
tage, IL only the change be in the rigf
direction.-Outing Magazine.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
Practiced Too Often.

A young doctor who had lately
started practice In a country town bit
upon a capital plan for advertising
himself. He went to church regularly.
but in the middle OF the service some
one came In and called him out.
This happened three times. but on
the third occasion the minister got
even with him. He stopped the serv-
ice and said: 81 see that some one Is
IN great danger. since DR.. Bolus has
been called to see him. Before DR..
Bolus leaves the building let us unite
In prayer on behalf of this unfortunate
patient"
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
Music Maxims.

It is the tone that makes the music.
Pope.
Where there is music there can be
no harm.-Cervantss.
Music is but wild sounds civilized
into time and tune.-Fuller.
Music is the most comprehensive OF
all the arts. 1t can express everything
George Henry Hart.
Music is the only universal language.
All nations understand the music of
any nations-Laurence Enderby.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
A Chanua.

1--WE must economize." he said per
emptorily.
"Tm so glad" his wife exclaimed.
"You take the announcement more
good naturally than usual"
yes; it's pleasant to hear you use
the plural pronOun. Ordinarily when
there is any economizing needed you
expect me to do 1t ALL"
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
An Easx Gem parisen.

Uncle Ethan was In cautious frame
Of mind. which" somebody asked
him. do you think II the worst. .
Aood or Q drought"
Uncle Ethan scratched his head.
ut always depends" he replied. u
should say that a food was q great
deal worse, providing, Of course. that
there was q nood."-Youth's Compsa-
Ion.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
Still Life.

II pictures for your dining room
Appropriate, you wish
You'll choose a water color as
The right thing for a fish
And yet II you should like change
A very pleasant foil
For all the rest would be sardines.
They're always done in oil.
Cleveland Leader.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The After Dinner Speaker.


Oh. the soups / have drunk and the nsh
l have downed.
The SQUADS and the scallops and clans,
The sherbet and junk and the tenderioins.
Drowned.
The venison, chickens and hams.
The asparagus tips and the vegetable
stew.
The various dishes OF peas.
The bumblebees hips and the denitasse.
too.
The pastry and Neufchatel cheese
Oh. the Junk that / ate and the times AND
again
I've foolishly courted a bun"
Though | knew she would walt and that
l must explain
Thank heaven the season Is dora
Kansas City Star.
Ever No.i>. 1t?
Anglers they love 10 ,eli
or the fish :aey didn't eaten;
Our wives OF <.e men with whom
They might nave made Il match.
And IL this isn't true
] hope 4 may be burnt
The fish and the husbands caught
Aren't a patch on the ones that weren
Boston Transcript.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
He Knew.

Cant you make cake without re-
ferring to cookbook
81 have to see what ingredients to
use"
"Well. don't use ingredients! / pre-
fer currantsw- Spokane Spokesman
Review
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Other Extreme.

SWELL" signs the man with the wash
tie, NOW that the aeroplane is becom-
ing popular the women won't spend so
much money for automobile hats and
wells"
NO." growls the man with the In
growing mustache. but they'll blow In
Just as much on silk stockings and
high heeled shoes."-Judge.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
Last Lenoino. of Summer.

Last Loneines of Summer.
Oh, for a cake of Ice as large as any berg
afioat.
Oh. for lake OF lemonade that might
sustain a boat!
oh. for a wind OF frosty tang from on
glacier chill.
Oh, for a champagne at cooling shores
and a friend to pay the bill!
Philadelphia Ledger.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Dramatic Situation.

Where is the play OF Shakespeare's day!
Why fades the footlights' magic flame?
Alas, the light grows cold and gray.
And furnished lies n Garrick's name.
And moving pictures. so they say.
May even film the Hall of Fame.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Hurry or the Halt.

"Been having more trouble with
your automobile?'
YES" replied Mr.. Chuggins.
Were you arrested for speedingT
mo. That was yesterday. Today
I was arrested for blocking traffic.
Washington Star.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
Disappointino.

Bili-Did you say his first song was
disappointing? Jill-Yes. He sang Il
Am Going Far sway. Far Away to
Leave You Now" and he didn't 60
Yonkers Statesman.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Object or LIsp~..

"Were you bull or a bear when you
went into Wall street."
Neither. was one OF the fellows
they were both after" Exchange.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
I. aft.

Jack-I hear you had some money
left you. Tom-Yes; 1t left me quito
awhile ago.-Boston Transcript.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
The Imperial Double Disk Harrow

Two Hafrows Com
bined in ore for the por-
pose of saving time and
labor In thing the soil.
1t works the ground twice at
one operation. The forward
pair of gangs cut the ground
and throw it outward. the real
gangs cut it again and throw 1t
back leaving the surface finely
pulverized and perfectly level
For preparing corn stubble
ground for wheat it has no
equal. We sell the Harrow
with guarantee of its giving
entire satisfaction or you may
return it.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21

Our generosity should never exceed
our abilities. Cicero.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21
BY Moonlight.

Evelyn Did you notice the q"'e'
looking canoes: Why. they are nK'
bowls.
Ernest-H'm. ! think they are mort
like spoons "-Baltimore American
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1910-09-21

great cause sheadache. bousness, INDIGESTION oaa
Has your recommended Aver PS to your
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1910-08-27

The leading feature of performance
of Uncle Toms Cabin to the thousands
of lady patrons who flock to see it, is
the character of Eva. Managers here
tofore have found it difficult task to
find child suited to it in looks, size
and temperament to correctly interpret
this role, but Mason Bros. pride them
selves in being able to present the
smallest, most winsome and most tai
ented child artist ever seen in the part
before. In baby Beland, six year old
infant prodigy, is an ideal Eva, and a
little miss that is living counterpart
of the lovable child of Mrs. Stoves
great play. She comes from theatri-
cal family and was practically born in
the profession. She not only speaks
her lines distinctly and intelligently, but
she sings and dances with the skill Of
an adult. There is nothing precocious
about this little miss, she is simply q
sweet. lovable little artist who wins
the hearts of her audiences nightly and
gives vivid and 1ifelike portrayal of
the most beautiful child character ever
conceived by playwright Of this or
former times.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1910-08-27
New High School
A Model Building.
Building Is Complete in Every Detail
and Adequate to the Needs For
Many Years to Come.

The high school building which Bara-
ga township school district expects
completed today is model structure
and easily the best and finest for its
size in northern Michigan. Its cost
can not be given at the present time
for there are several small items still
to be taken into consideration.
The structure is located fifty. feet
north of the old schoolhouse, on a bluff
overlooking L'Anse Bay, with plenty
of room for large lawn and play
ground, which in due time will be lev
eled and slightly terraced. The build
ing is of solid brick, terra Gotta in col
or, black mortar being used, and is
two stories high, with attic and base
ment. The foundation is built of Port
age Lake sandstone. The structure is
surmounted by cupula, which is oc-
tagonal in shape, topped by fagpole.
The halftone presented in this issue
of our paper will giveyou an idea of
the handsomeness of the new hall of
learning. Upon the inside, long hall
runs through the center of the building
on the first floor. A drinking fountain
graces the center of this hall, the floor
being of tiling. Four rooms are on the
first floor. The second floor has two
classrooms in the back, the front por-
ton being taken up by q recitation
room, Office, laboratory and large as
sembly room.
The building is heated throughout by
means of combination direct and in
direct system of steam heat, which
comes from the central plant located in
the basement. Toilet rooms and play
rooms for both boys and girls are also
in the basement.
Great credit is reflected on the Bara-
ga Township Board of Education for
the han6someness and utility of this
new building. The board is composed
of representative men, citizens who
come from various walks IN life and
who have the welfare of the communi.
ty at heart. They have successfully
handled hugh building project. and
one of the most pleasing features OF
the progress of the work was the close
attention which each and every mem
Der of the board gave to the details OF
the construction, for each has been as
vigilant as though the building were his
own personal enterprise. Another
pleasing thing to contemplate is that
everything in connection with the
building project was handled in thor
ough business-like manner and every
penny fully accounted for.
The. taxpayers of Baraga are to have
a large measure of credit for the new
structure by signifying their progress
iveness in authorizing the appropria-
ton of SIS. .oo0.00,
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1910-08-27
LOCAL ITEMS.

Frank Feister spent Monday in
L'Anse the guest of his brother, Will
liam, while en- route from Houghton to
Kenton.
Abner Crebassa, who was attending
the Marquette Business College, re-
turned to his home in L'Anse Saturday
last.
d. Levitan is at present in Chicago,
purchasing goods for the department
store. in this town. He will accept a
position as travelling salesman upon
completion of this work.
A. E. Bishoff, of Superior, is spend
ing the week in L'Anse, the guest of
relatives.
Miss Anna Levitan left the Universi-
ty of Michigan yesterday for Raymond,
South Dakota, where she will teach in
the public schools of that city.
Mrs. Exilda Trudeau and daughter,
Elizabeth, returned Sunday from Han
cock, where they were visiting rela-
tives several days.
Station Agent F. w. and Mrs. Knep-
pie and children left Tuesday for Mil
waukee to visit relatives.
C. H. Menge was in Lake Linden
Wednesday on business.
Mrs. George A. Trudeau and daugh-
ter, Theresa, returned to their home
in L'Anse from Symco, Wis, Wednes-
day, after several weeks visit with
relatives.
Ernest p. Clark of Corrunna, Mich,
has been appointed principal of the Pc
quaming school
Mr.. and Mrs. George P. Sterk and
daughter, of Escanaba, arrived ir
L'Anse Saturday last and are guests
of Mrs John Sterk.
Mr.. and Mrs. Toney F. Sterk, Of
Kearsarge, were week end guests oi
Mrs. John Sterk.
Manager John T. Keranan, of Her
man Keranan's store at Herman, was
in L'Anse Thursday on business.
Master Carl Peterson left Thursday
for Hazel to visit relatives for several
days.
The following marriage licences
were issued by Deputy County Clerl
Deschaine: Albin Stewart Barr of Pc
quaming to Clara May Gibbs of Green
vile; Joseph Prevo to Eva Smith o.
L'Anse; George immonen to Ella Silver
of Pequaming.
Miss Della Perrault arrival il
L'Anse Wednesday and is guest o
Mrs. Charles Marceau.
Miss Pearl Marceau returned Wednes
day from a two weeks visit with rela
tives at Ishpeming.
Misses Hazel Price and Ethel Youn,
of Marquette, arrived in L'Anse Sat
urday last and are guests at the Cnive
home.
Jacob Kmsisto of Herman. was il
L'Anse Thursday.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1910-08-27
OSBORN Rally wen Attended.

An old-time Osborn rally was held in
the Town Hall Thursday evening, the
large crowd being addressed by Hon.
w. R. Oates of Laurium and Rev. j.
A. Kennedy.
The above named gentlemen, Messrs.
Oates and Kennedy, gave eloquent ad-
dresses, which converted all who were
not staunch Osborn supporters. We
do not mean to say that L'Anse town.
ship harbors any who are not Osborn
men, but wish it definitely understood
that after hearing the addresses one
could not help but put all doubts aside
and see clearly that Osborn is the man
we want in the governors chair next
year.
The meeting was largely attended
and must say that if this meeting was
a proof of the way other meetings are
attended, we fear that the Escanaba
editor stands fine chance of losing
the plug hat he wants to wager to the
effect that Chase will not go over the
straits with 1900, 10000. $4,000 or
10000 majority. 1t would be shame
to wear the hat.
On the last page we print state
ment by Chase, which will be well
worth your perusal. We also show a
cartoon of Governor Warner as the
Apostle of Truth" he being credited
with saying, "As Osborn contradicts
himself about every other day, it is
hardly necessary for anyone to show
the utter falsity of many of his state.
ments. Chase should try to mix few
facts in his talks" By his pedestal,
we should judge that Warner is hardly
in position to make such a remark.
The L'Anse sentinel. (L'Anse, L.S., Mich.) 18??-current, 1910-08-27
Camp Meeting Notes.

The two camps of L'Anse young
people seem to be having the time Of
their lives.
The services last Sunday were well
attended by L'Anse and Pequaming
people.
The visiting ministers, as well as the
local Indian preachers, have all rem
dered fine services. Everybody enjoys
the singing.
Tomorrow is the closing day. The
District Superintendent, James Pascoe,
will be the preacher. The last quarter
ly conference will be held Sunday af-
ternoon at l:s0.