Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1910-08-04
AN OLD BUsYBoDY.
What the Bridegroom Thought Of tho
Old Native at the Station.


Old Native at the Station.
While waiting for the train the bride
aud bridegroom walked slowly up and
down the platform.
II don't know what this joking and
guying may have been to you" he re-
marked. but it's death to me. never
experienced such an ordeal"
Its perfectly dreadful" she an
swcred. II shall be so glad when we
get away from everybody we know"
"They're actually impertinent," he
went on. why, the very natives
| At this unpropitious moment the
whcezy old station master walked up
| to them.
BE you goln' to take this trainy" he
asked
Its none Of your business" retorted
the bridegroom indignantly us he
guided the bride up the platform.
where they ccndoled with each other
over the tmpertinence of some OF the
natives
Onward came the train. its vapor
curling from afar. 1t was the last
to their destination that day-an ex-
press. Nenrer and nearer 1t came nc
full speed: then in a moment it whiz-
zcd past and WAS gone.
why In thunder didn't that train
stnp:" yelled the bridegroom.
Cos you srd 'twarn't none of my
business. ! has to signal IL that trains
tn stop.
Nv ~ .t,lfi ,N.tx
stroked -, d";lru there was II wicked
twinkle Ill nls eye London it-Rits.
He Was Acting.
Stephen niliips the dramatist ard
poet. began life as II member of Il. X.
Brnsons repertoire company. Al
amusing story is told OF his debut, Nj.
i'cns"n had told him that the grrHr
thing for an uclur Is tu act. "lt does
not matter" he continued. so uuurl,
what lhr words are which the actor
sinals as the impression which hecun-
scNs To the audience by those words
Then he gave MIR Phillips the part nf
l.allhaZ;ir in "no,l,s, aud bullet" t.t
the first night Baiiiaaar managed t.i.
the rest. Romeo. In the person of Mr..
BENSON. bad tu 80 to his assisialp. /.
and speak the rest ot The part for him.
while Bhltllnzhr exhibited an agony nt
sleechless grief 'W hat .lu v,.,l moan .
Mr.. Rens,,n nf'prMn.d drnn,li.i,sl. "uy
.oing nll the stage without Showing
Your Inlrt: II W;iS only doing wliae
j you told me. You said The .rput ,hln..
on The Stage WAS not so much ITO
/ words you speak us to act Well, [
WAS ucting"--l.ulidon lit. Bits.
Tact.
Il am sorry to have to tell you s,,.
boys" said the pleasant looking visitor
who was addressing the Sunday
school. 'bu, there is not one chance
In II thousand that any one OF you
ever will be I,.'sldral o1 the United
States"
Still he failed 10 secure their undi-
vided attention.
"liut II you live up to your oppor-
tunities." he Went on. eying them
keenly. "some bright boy In this audi
cure may become great baseball!
! pitcher or the worlds champion bats
ni,.
Instantly every boy sat up straight
and began to listen.-Chicago Tribune,
Too Full.
| a man very much intoxicated was
taken to the police station.
why did you not bail him out?" In
Qutred bystander of friend
"Ball him out" exclaimed the other.
"Why. you couldn't pump him outv'
Allowances.
! "Of course | admit your son is ex-
travagant. But you must make allow
ances: he's young"
That's all right! But the more al
lowances make the quicker he blows
'em."-Judge.
TO rob a robber l. not robbing.-
French Psovseh
s-AD