Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1910-08-14
Dame Rwnor Does Society.

Dame Runor Does Society.
Listen, dears-my good humor is
enualled only with my daring this
morning and is all embracing, sex not
yithstanding-the best has happened.
That is, it will be a newsy, breezy
breeze TO you, but chances are-the
society editor will get lynched-but
that's nothing at all. It's an i'll wind
that blows nobody good, proverbially
spcaking, and besides it's the old lady
who is to blame. one all-important
mart of masculinity asked me recently
WHY | addressed the men on this page
as thew never read it. imp! How do
YOU reckon he knew the men were
sometimes included? Anyhow, men
and maidens all. bark ye, to the story
of this old lady who rescued our half
drowned society sheet from the mo-
news breakers. With a rush and a
roar. they were upon us. The alluring
song of the mermaid was pulling us
deep down into the sea of oblivion
when a chattering dame grabbed us
from the o~utstretched arms of the
green eyed maid of the waves. And
she wrung the page dry, with her
Wrinkled, restless hands. and restored
il TO the writer, who stood on the
shore. frantic over the destruction OF
her dear chee-eld Society whom she
was powerless to aid.
Can you guess the name of the gray
old lady? There's never a n of YOU
who has not met and talked with her
never q one to whom she has not
administered one of her ready slaps.
She is one of the worlds powers
everything she hears-everything she
knows-and everything she-tells. She
is to our grown-up days what the
'bogie man is to our childhood. IT'S
not a case of AN the goble uns1l
git you
Eff you
Don't
Watch
Out
But old Dame Rumor II git YOU /
Ef you
Don't
Watch
Out,
Truth to tell. she will get GU, any
how-seems she ought to be counted
the third proverbial certainty-death.
taxes and gossip.
If you fall ia IoNc-she's wise-ifI
YOU fall out-she's wiser,
II you are good she's not so sure
if YOU are bad. she's surer.
Kiss your swee%tlicart-she whispers.
kiss the other fellows. she shouts.
Laugh aud spend your money she's
kind-frown and none alone she's
SO whether you are good or
whether you are bad; whether you are
I'm love or whether YOU are not:
whether YOU marry or whether you
tarry-the prying old lady's w%itchery
awaits you.
Now, the dame seemed quite dis
gusted at the slack society page and
when | old her that il really was not
my fault and that ] was just as sorry
as she could be and as Disguised as
you are-but what's the USE
Why-her little greedy eyes spark
led suddenly as she %pondered my
words, and guess now what she said?
She agreed to write society this week
OF course. Dame Rumor can't write
(too busy talking), but she said she
would gather in the dope. and | was
10 enter it in her own words.
Maybe It was wrong. cut YOU all
how fascinating the Dame can
be, and, somehow, / could not resist
her quavering pleas. Everybody be a
good fellow and don't get mad, and
here's what was old to me:
Now" said the prying and pre-
Valent one. as she sneaked into thu
office yesterday. proceed TO the type
writer and put out for publication the
bits OF news I've gathered in" Aside
twhen YOU see that word today.
please understand it's the o%versigned
talking). The old lady looked so wise
and talked in such mysterious tones
mat the herein writer was almost
guilty of freezing extremities.
We'll" continued the old bag.
'Asidc-She can't read, ether.
j discovered g bridge club. an ex-
elusive two-table affair, hat has just
been clever enough to give YOU the
all these months. CAside-This
1lu woman can be disagreed ble). 1t
held forth every Wednesday. or
every other one, not just sure about
mat part Of it." (A-s-ide-Jot that
in your mental capacity one
.hlng. she didn't know. for sure).
hey certainly deserve great credit"
h laughed-no, you couldn't
al 1t a laugh-cackled is better. Its
lllnost inconceiyable-a protracted
ilence by a feminine bridge club, one
'i The marvels OF the age, But they /,
ire discovered now. SO don't let them
-sespe the society page n more
hey we're over at Mrs. Bernard (
Nodey's last Wednesday and after an :
interesting game seemed lust as in
in the 'pcachicst-(aside.
ne talks slang)--looking luncheon. r
FIowers and good things to eat .