Evening journal., 1910-07-16
NEW NEWS OF YESTERDAY
The Story That Phil Armour
Liked to Hear
BY "HolIand."
BY "HolIand."

One Of the quaintest, most original
and most delightful characters that
ever sat in a legislators chair Was
Uncle David Gray, a member of the
New York State Assembly IN the win
ter OF 1880. SO quaint character. in
deed, was he that he gained notoriety
not bounded by the State He IL was
who was the originator OF the proverb,
Fair play. and half the road" and by
II he sedulously regulated his life. He
IL was. also. who taught the great
comedian Billy Florence, how to ex-
ecute the remarkable pigeon-wing
with which he invariably brought
down the house I'm the role of Bard
we'll Slote I'm THE Mighty Dollar"
a famous comedy In its day
One morning, several years before
Uncle David Gray, kindly philosoph
er TO the last. died at a ripe old age,
Or. NJ. o. Terry, who has a world
wide reputation in the medical fra
ternity by reason of his advocacy OF
the oil treatment i'm appendicitis, and
who was formerly surgeon general of
the State OF New York, met Uncle
David Gray In the railroad station at
Utica, n. Y. He wore his old-fashioned
slouch hat and slab-sided shoes The
carpet bag that he carried must have
done service for some of his ancestors.
His eyes were bright and swapping
with fun. his chin was clean shaven
and his unstarched linen Immediately
white.
Good morning. Uncle David" ex-
claimed DR.. Terry. Going on trip?"
Yes. sir" chuckled Uncle David.
Pm going out to Chicago TO see Phil
Armour | guess he's low spirited or
bilious. He sent for me yesterday TO
come out and cheer him up"
so you know Mr. Armour, do your
asked Dr. Terry
Know Phil Armour" exclaimed
Uncle David. why we grew up as
boys together. and I tell you doctor.
when I go to see Phil-and he sends
for me every once in z while-he
treats me like an old friend. He puts
me in a bedroom that's got carpet as
soft as young grass. guess there
must be half a dozen bathrooms on
that floor and he gives me one all TO
myself. We have the best of times to-
gether. talking Of the old days. / kind
of expect that Phil has sent for me to
tell him the story once again of how
we snapped Horasch Seymour over
fence. or through il, one time when
We were playing snap-the-whip My
you ought to see Phil laugh when
tell him that story.
Tell it to me. Uncle David" DR..
Terry asked.
We'll. Will, and III tell It to you
Just as | am going to tell il to Phil to-
morrow. You see, when we we're
youngsters together Phil and used to
play snap-the-w whip a whole lot of the
time, and we got so we could snap any
boy we wanted to off the end of the
line-twitch him wherever we wanted
him to go. We got real skittish at it.
well, one day Horasch Seymour
came down TO visit friend. and"
when you say Horasch Seymour -
interrupted Dr. Terry, "do you mean
the Horatio Seymour who was twice
governor OF New York and Democratic
candidate for president against Cen
eral Grant?"
That's the chap" cried Uncle David
with his eyes all asparkle. There
never was but one Horasch Seymour
and he was a coclSy little fellow. Well
Phil said: Let's play snap-the-whiI
and put Horasch at the end Of the
lash. Horasch was willing, but
cracky! he didn't know what was COM
ing to him. So we just started in, and
pretty soon we gave a mighty SNAP
to the whip, and the next thing Hor-
asch knew he was breaking through q
fence and all sprawled out on the
grass It's funny amt II? We boys
never thought in that snap-thewhir
there was one boy who was going tc
be governor and another who was 60
ing to be a great beef packer.
well, now, tomorrow night, about
half past eight, you can think Of me
washed up and just had good dinner
with Phil In his little room, and he
will be asking me to tell him how we
snapped Horasch Seymour OF the enc
Of the whip. And when | tell him, Why
II you'll listen hard, you can almost
hear him laugh
Uncle David Gray chuckled reminis
Pcontly. "Phil says that story alway:
fills him with glee and takes his
troubles away" he explained Il sup
pose if was as rich a man as Phi
/ might get the blues myself some
day"
And a few minutes later the quaint
old humor-loving -philosophe
was on his way to cheer up the mai
who taught the world how to utiliz
everything Of the hog except it
squeal.
Copyright, 1910. by E. J. Edwards
All rights reserved.
Monday Mr.. Edwards will tell O