The Washington herald., 1910-12-11

Al what age should a man marry?
This is a question that has been dis
cussed for ages, and yet it would seem
that there is but one answer TO il, las al
ways it has been, namely. follow the
inclination of nature" in all instances.
OF course. in the first place. marriage
means the desire for domesticity and for
the perpetuation OF the race. Present
day social conditions make the family
the main factor OF the existence of ma
ton as well as the basis OF our legal
system of inheritance.
Nature says that a young man should
marry not before the age Of eighteen.
but not later than at twenty. Reason
and experience add their voices to that
of nature, and both say that young
man who is single sows wild oats or is
either i'll or unhappy; or II not sick or
unhappy, he IS a mOnstrous exception
whom any father or mother should hate
to have as a son.
Aristotle. the celebrated physieian-phi
losopher OF ancient Greece, said a man
should marry at thirty-fve. Plato. who
disseminated Socratean teachings, said
at thirty Montaigne, who married at
thirty, praised Aristotle for his maxim
in these words: do we wish TO be loved
by our children? Do we care 10 deprive
them of the opportunity TO wish for our
death? Let us make their lives as pleas
ant as we possibly can For that rea-
son we should not marry young, for II
W. do they will have TO wait TOO Ions for
Us 20 make room for them
Nfasvgrhr German nRSCl-
mist and scholastic philosopher, makes
short work of the entire matter in these
few words: From twenty to thirty mar
riage is a necessity; after thirty Il is
only useful"
But what all Of these great men seem
10 have omitted in laying down their the
Dries Is the quite" important fact that
| il take two TO get married. Is II also
a necessity for young girl 10 marry
when she is sixteen? 1 say. Yes. It IS.
h Causes Moral Suffering.
A young girl as a rule does not run
wild between sixteen and twenty, but
she suffers. physically sometimes, moral
~ always II she is of a dreaming nat
ure, she loses hersesf in romantic, mel
ancholy and sad thought. The novels
which are most harmful 10 the young are
not those she reads. but those she in
vekts. II she is practical she becomes a
/ gossip
In any case she Is crushed by the feel
/ ing OF her uselessneSs. She Is tortured
/ by il and is able TO shake il of only by
/ day dreams or gossip. In most cases
| they do not shake Il of. and their mac
| tivity arouses pity in others and often in
/ their own hearts. The happiest girls be-
/ tween twenty and thirty are those who
keep house for their widowed fathers.
They have an occupation. they are some
/ body and feel that they count for some
thing. They are not very unhappy; and
/ this is seen IN their gait their gestures,
and their eyes. They have eyes that look
/ frankly right and left. The young girl
should marry at sixteen: at eighteen II is
already a little too late.
] The young girl who waits 10 marry a
/ man until his youth is past, after all
| marries a man who has had all the eX-
! ptrience OF love, while she has had none,
and this Is exceedingly distasteful to her.
/ though she may say nothing about II. 1t
! causes uneasiness ard retrospective jeal-
ously. Retrospective jealousy is Just as
strong in woman as il is in man. The
/ jealousy OF married women is nearly
always founded on retrospective jeal-
ousy. and from this it borToWs a strength
which IL would not have otherwise, be-
/ cause a married woman has the feeling
that she cannot be the only one.
! Leon Blum in his book on marriage.
/ has proposed the solution that girls
| should marry at the same age as men
that is to say late, and only after hav-
ing had as many love affairs as men
have so that equality is maintained.
What makes the plan difficult is this
that woman Is by nature homogeneous
The liaisons OF the young man touch his
! heart little or not at all. The love af-
fairs OF a young girl. and especially the
1 first, change her whole being, her heart
| and soul, so completely that she would
never be able 10 love her husband in the
| same way
Prefers Early Marriages.
There remains, then, only the solution
of making the young men OF eighteen
marry girls of sixteen. These are the
indications of nature. experience, and
reason. But we should follow the indica-
tons Of nature only when social condi-
tons do not absolutely forbid them.
Does not the present civilization abso-
lutely forbid marriages between the very
young? Under our present social condi-
tons things are not natural IL should
be like this Charles married when he
was eighteen: he is now thirty-eight. His
son Pierre, who married last year, has q
son Jean. Charles viii educate Jean un-
| til he himself is fifty years old. Pierre
who will by that time be thirty-two, will
follow his example, and so on
Each generation thus would be educat-
ed first by the grandfathers and grand
mothers. then by the fathers and moth
ers. half by the former and half by the
latter This would strengthen the fam
lily. make it more solid, and the position
or the grandparents would be quite diff.
ferent from what it is to-day AS Il is
they are old people who are united witt
the children by their common feebleness
They are children whom the children
consider almost their equals. Under nat
ural conditions they are the columns Of
the house, the great domestic authorities
If this were so the words grandfather
and grandmother would have some sense
A true and strong family ought TO con
sist of three generations, grandparents
parents, and children as far as possible
living under one roof.
Bliss DestrOyers.