davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
NOT THE TIME FOR THAT
scotsmen Objected to Mixture Of Good
Whisky and Religious Con-
versstion.

Owen Seaman, editor of Punch, was
the principal guest at a dinner Of the
London Authors club recently, which
was followed by q discussion on
"Humor.' Mr.. Seaman began with a
story d~eprecating the spelling Of good
dinners by any discussion at all.
There we're three characters in the
story-a bluebottle and two Scots
men. The story at once struck a note
Of probability by showing the Scots
men drinking whisky. The bluebottle
buzzed on the pane; otherwise ST
lence reigned.
This was broken by one Of the
Scotsmen trying to locate the blue.
bottle with geological exactitude. Said
the Scotsman:
SANDY, I'm thinking il yon fly is q
birdie or q beastie."
The other replied: Man, don't spoil
good whisky with religious converse.
ton"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

ballroom. The peeress herself was an
elderly lady who eve attended
dances, but she generally complied
with the requests Of her friends. who
had smart little houses lacking IN
space.
Each season about q dozen large
dances were held at her mansion.
Last summer. however. n borrower
went too far; she did not play tie
game, and she had all the bills for the
ball directed to the peerless, who PAID
them. but has never lent her house to
any one since.
Queen Mary, who is very much IN
touch with all current social LIE.
knows of the existence of the borrow
er, and is likely to end her London ca
reer. Women whose e do not
allow them to meet their social obl1-
cations without taxing the good ma
ture of their friends will not be en-
couraged to enter the court circle.
no matter how good their pedigree.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
SOCIETY BORROWER MUST GO
Feature Of London's Smart Set Is
Likely to Disappear Under
the New Regime.

London.-The borrower" who has
for some years been a feature of Lon
don society, is likely to disappear
somewhat under the new regime. She,
for the borrower Is usually a woman,
came in with the sporting set, which
has had things its own way. She Is
generally of good family and is an ex-
cellent sportswoman. but impecunious.
She never borrows money except
from members of her family, and she
does not really need to do so, as she
has to pay for little. She borrows
motor cars and weekend cottages. She
has been seen at dinners wearing the
jewels of a good-natured friend.
When she wants to bring out a
daughter she borrows a ballroom, and
it is no uncommon thing to see an
nounced in a London paper that Lady
So and So will give a dance for her
debutante daughter at the house OF
Countess This and That.
One wealthy and good-natured peer
ess used to be i%mportuned by borrow
ers for the loan of her London man.
sion, which contained a magnificent
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
ABaby Harry Who Weighs AIS
Pounds, Fears He Will Starve
Account Labor Laws.

Chicago.-Too fat to go to school;
too fat to get clothes to fit him; too
fat to do ordinary work, Eugene Craw-
ford the other day lost the Job that
brought him bread and butter and
clothes, because he Is too young.
Nobody loves a fat boy" was the
plant of the youngster, who is IA
years old and who recently has been
showing his Ats pounds Of solid flesh
lat Riverview Park. To many the
story Of the boy was very humorous.
but to him 1t is a serious matter to
be a very, very fat boy.
State Factory Inspector Davies
found the boy at the amusement park
and complained that the child labor
law was being violated. Today Baby
Harry appeared at Mr.. Davies Office
in person to plead his case. His trou-
Ibles started when he entered the door.
"Come in" said Assistant Inspector
barney Cohen.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
PUT SANDALS ON PET DOGS
Latest Unique Fad of london Society
IL to Dress CANNES In Col
ored Boots.

London-Summer sandals are at
present being worn by the elite OF the
canine world.
Doggie's boots are sold in all colors,
both serious and gay. and are. as a
rule, laced on his feet.
In the summer, however, these boots
are somewhat too heavy for their
wearers, so sandals are substituted.
Sandals can be obtained in all
Sizes" said a dogs outftter.
They are similar In shape to those
worn by babies. and are made Of
leather and fastened by a strap and
button In ordinary sandal STYLE"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
School Of Seventy-five Follow
Vessel for Two Hours.
Never Before in Memory of Shippers
Were Huge Mammals so Num-
erous Along Atlantic Coast
as at Present Time.

New York.-No vessel passing
through the picket line Of whales
which has patrolled the Atlantic coast
from Florida to Maine since July has
encountered such a large school as
did the schooner Ella l.. Davenport,
which arrived the other day from
Charleston, S. c., with lumber. Never
before in the memory Of shippers ma
king this port were the huge NAM
mails SO numerous as at the present
time. Whalers which formerly were
forced to traverse . Arctic seas in
search of their quarry merely put out
to sea nowadays and harpoon their
prey.
Il had seer several small schools of
whales on the way up" said Captain
John F. Dunton, of the Davenport.
None of these schools came very
close. But about 20 miles southeast
of Winter Quarter Shoal lightship.
down at the Delaware Capes, the larg-
est bunch of 'em l ever saw hove up
from the south. 1t wasn't a school. it
was a big university. You can't count
whales very well, because as soon as
you count one he hobs under, comes
up In another place, dives down again
and sticks up his spout for another
tally.
But l marked the ocean off into
four parts when the whales circulated
all around, and gave n quarter to
the first mate, one quarter to h sec
ond mate, the third quarter to the
bo'swain and the fourth to my wife.
l kept tally on all four. Dividing by
three to account for the natural rest
lessness of the animals, I'm pretty
sure that there were at least rs
whales in that university. My wife
declares there were 200.
They didn't do any harm, except
ing one that scraped the bottom of
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
TO vAccINATE CANARY BIRDS
Faris Pasteur Institute Makes Little
songster Immune From Dreaded
Marsh Fever.

Paris.-Nothing is too small for the
attention Of the Pasteur Institute In
Paris. provided It II connected in any
way with infection. It appears that
the canary suffers from a sort Of
marsh fever. communicated to 1t BY
an insect known as the codex. Doctor
Roux. the head Of the institute, has
told the academy Of science that the
bacillus Of this fever has been iso-
lated and q serum made to inoculate
other csparies.
Canarias vaccinated with this
serum proved comparatively immune
against the attacks Of the codex,
while n~oninoculated birds suffered se-
verely when attacked.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Whales FoNow a Ship
Copyright. 1910, western Newspaper Union.

the hull The schooner ratified down
below and settled a little to leeward,
but the whale swung from under and
the boat righted herself. My wife
was pretty badly scared, I can tell
you, but didn't think we'd come to
harm. | know a whale will never
smash into a ship unless 1t is attack
ed first. They're good natured and
seem to know that there's plenty Of
room in the ocean"
For more than two hours the school
accompanied the ship. swimming
along in twos and threes, turning,
diving. swimming below the surface
in all directions, but keeping in the
general direction of the Davenport.
After they had escorted the Daven-
port for nearly ten miles they sud-
denly headed for the south, and In
five minutes were out of sight.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Fat Boy Cannot Get Work
Cant" said the fat boy. I'm Bah,
Harry and I'm too fat.

Cant" said the fat boy. I'm Baby
Harry and I'm too Fat.
A side door built on more expansive
lines was found and he entered tho
room.
III you don't let me work I'll starve
to DEATH" he said to the inspector.
Its awful to be 80 fat"
why don't you 90 to school?" ask
ed Mr.. Cohen.
Cant" replied the boy. Il am too
fat. They could not ind any place 10
put me. I was too big for the desks
and II the teacher got me . chair 1t
usually broke when 1 used It."
Just then the sofa began to creak
and MI. Cohen looked anxious.
IT you don't let me stay 1t the park
and earn some money" continued
Baby Harry. Il don't know what / win
do"
TITS too bad" said Inspector Davies,
but you must stop. The law IL plain
and o cannot appear any more"
Then Harry went out BY the large
door. sobbing.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Dogs Gold Teeth GListen

than a year old. A Peoria dentist, who
is a friend of Mr.. Cantwell, did the
dental work. Some of her teeth were
getting in bad condition, and one day
Mr.. Cantwell remarked to the dentist
that he was going to send his young
est daughter to him for some dental
work. Instead of the youngest daugh-
ter" however, there appeared at the
dentists office Biddy, with an escort.
Fortunately she has a good dispos-
ition, and the dental work was done
without mishap, though toward the
end of the operation she began to
grow somewhat peevish. Whisper 1t
not to Biddy, but it is said on good
authority that some more dental work
awaits her at an early date.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Wants Children Spanked.

Greeley, Col.-American children are
Lot sufficiently spanked, declared DR..
G. Stanley Hall, president of Clark uni
versity, Worcester. Mass. in an adj
dress.
Il do not believe in too much fog
ging, but 1t should not be abolished"
he asserted. Americans protect their
children too much. and It makes them
precocious and disrespectful. A little
Shaping now and then r~einforces tho
moral purposes of the child"
The doctor defended laughing until
one falls from the chair and rolls I'M
der the table," also championed get
ting angry. crying and dancing.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Bees stop Sale.

York, Pa.-While an auctioneer at
the sale of the property Of Mrs. Har-
vey Smell, at Carleyville, this county,
was asking for bids upon a hive of
bees, the little honeymakers became
rufled at the inspection to which they
were subjected. They sailed forth,
putting to fight a hundred or more
people, including the auctioneer. A
number were stung and the sale had
to be postponed until the bees settled
into the hive again.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

ment failed to help. When in despair
/ began with Doan's Kidney Pills and
soon improved. Continued use cured
me and at present my health is ex-
cellent."
Remember the name-Doan's.
For sale by all dealers. so cents a
box. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Vermont Thrift.

Robert Lincoln O'Brien, editor of the
Boston Transcript, is a great admirer
of the thrift Of the Vermonters, but
thinks sometimes they carry 1t too
far.
O'Brien was up in Vermont last sum
mer and went to dinner with a friend
who had some political aspirations. AS
they came in the door he heard the
lady Of the house say to the hired
girl: Il see Mr.. Jones has somebody
with him for dinner. Take these two
big potatoes down to the cellar and
bring up three small ones"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Outlining Treatment.

II want you to take care Of my
practise while l am away"
But, doctor, l have just graduated.
Have had little experience"
"You don't need it with my fashion
able patients. Find out what they
have been eating. and stop it. Find
out where they have been summering
and send 'em somewhere else"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Does Engineering Work.

Mile. Bandurin is superintendent of
an engineering firm in Russia. She
was graduated from the Women's
archaeological Institute in st. Peters
burg, and has had practical expe-
rience in engineering. She built a
steel warehouse for an army cooper
alive society. has been assistant en-
gineer in building a bridge across the
Neva and has done other important
work.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Roonn0.

OF best quality for barns, fheds. chicken
houses and residences.-Ffte and water
proof. needs no paint, takes care OF itself,
will last for years. Get the best, all
lengths s to ID feet. Full weight goods.
Send this ad with order. Pidgeon-Thomas
Iron Co, THE Roofing Folks" "a, IS N.
I'd St. Memphis. Tenn.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
500 Reward. 500.

The readers of this paper will be pleased 70 learn
that there i at least one dreaded disease that science
has been able to cure In all its stages. and that 10
Catarrh. Halls Catarrh Cure y the only positive
cure now known to the medical fraternity. Catarrh
being Q constitutional disease. requires . constitu-
tional treatment. Halls Catarrh Cure Is taken In.
ternally. acting directly upon the blood and mucous
surfaces Of the system. thereby destroying the
foundation Of the disease. and giving the patient
strength by building up the constitution and assist
ing nature In doing It's work. The proprfet0rs have
20 much faith In It's curative powers that they offer
One Hundred Dollars for any case that It tats -
cure. Send for list Of testimonials.
Address F. J. CHENEY & CO.. Toledo. O.
Sold by all Druggists. f5c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
A Fallen Idol.

What makes you SO sure the Amer
lean public is fickle?"
THE reception a player. who used
to be on the home team gets when he
comes visiting"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

developed and for q
whole year, / was un-
able to FORK l suf-
fered agonizing pains
in my back and the
kid secretions
were in terrible con-
dition. My vitality
gradually diminished
aud tho doofor,c tract
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
TINY BABY'S PITIFUL CASE

"Our baby when two months old
was suffering with terrible eczema
from head to foot, all yer her body.
The baby looked just like a skinned
rabbit. We were unable to put clothes
on her. At first 1t seemed to be a few
mattered pimples. They would break
the skin and peel of leaving the I'M
derneath skin red as though it were
scalds. Then a few more pimples
would appear and spread all over the
body. leaving the baby all raw without
skin from head to foot. On top of her
head there appeared a heavy scab a
quarter of an inch thick. It was aw-
full to see SO small a baby look as she
did. Imagine! The doctor was afraid
to put his hands to the child. We
tried several doctors remedies but all
failed.
Then we decided to try Cuticura-
BY using the Cuticura Ointment we
softened the scab and it came Oh. I'm
der this, where the real matter was,
by washing with the Cuticura Soap
and applying the Cuticura Ointment.
q new skin oon appeared. We also
gave baby four drops Of the Cuticura
Resolvent three times daily. After
three days you could see the baby
gaining a little skin which would peel
of and heal underneath. Now the
baby is four months old. She is a fine
picture of a fat little baby and all
is well. We only used one cake of CUT
cura Soap, two boxes Of Cuticura Oint-
ment and one bottle Of Cuticura Re
solvent. If people would know what
Cuticura is there would be few suffer
Ing with eczema. Mrs. Joseph Koss-
mann, 7 st. Johns Place, Ridgewood
Heights, N. Y, Apr. 30 and May 4, 'O9."
"The Wish Is Father to the Thought"
DR.. Robert L. Waggoner, the presi-
dent of Baldwin university, said, in
the course of an address on pedagogy
at Berea, O.:
And one of the most remarkable
changes in the last 80 years of teach
Ing is the abolition of corporal pun
lshment. A boy Of this generation Is
never whipped. But a boy of the last
generation-well!"
Doctor Waggoner smiled.
'.The boys of the last generation"
he said, must have believed that
their instructors all had for motto:
The swish is father to the
taught"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
INJURED IN WRECK.
Conductor Thrown Down IS Foot
Embankment.

George Hahn, c. & N. w. conductor.
Arbor Ave-, West Chicago, ILL.,, says:
RI was thrown from a car down a 25-
foot embankment and my kidneys
were badly bruised. Kidney trouble
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Not That

1.-The doctor said that Bill was
drunk when we took the poor fellow
to have his head attended to last
night after he fell"
Doctor never said anything of the
kind"
Didn't l hear him? Said 1t was a
jagged cut"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

TO DRIVE OUT MALARIA -
AND BUILD Up THE SYSTEM
Take the Old Standard GROVES ESS
CHILL TONIC. You know what you are taking.
The formula is plainly printed on every bottle,
less form. The Qninine drives out The malaria
dealers for 80 years. Price 80 cents.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Hardly Worth While.

Scientists state that the sun will
continue to give out the present
amount Of heat for 3d. 1000 years"
THAT makes a two weeks vacation
look pif1ing. eh?"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
MOI UNDERSTANDABLE.

Horace Avory, K. G., just appointed
q judge, Is one of the mbrdant wits Of
the British bar. One day, cross-ex-
aiming . recalcitrant witness. he
asked:
What are your"
"A retired gentleman" proudly as
serted the ex-cheesemonger.
WELL" snarled Avery, when you
achieved the position of gentleman.
why did you retire from it,"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

The ortolan, the worlds finest and
costliest table bird, Is caught alive and
fattened on grain In darkened rooms.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
Sproutina up.

Don't you think, Mary, you are too
old to play with the boys?"
mo, mamma; the older | get, the
better / like them."-Judge.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

"Tis much to wound a foe; It's more
to save him and to win a friend.-Eric
Mackay.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

for 100 years PETTITS EYE SALvE has
positively cured eye diseases everywhere.
All druggists or Howard Bros. Buffalo, NY.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

Or. Pierce's pleasant Pellets cure constipation.
Constipation Is the cause of many diseases. Cure
the cause and you cure the disease. Easy to take.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

The more worthy any soul is. the
larger It's compassions-John Bright.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

Write me as one that loves his Eel.
low men.-Leigh Hunt.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

Important to Mothers
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORIA, a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and 9 that It.
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16
eoclal pebts.

Social Debts.
"6he telephones me every day
.sWhat is the reason OF that"
Il owe her a call and she is deter
mined to collect It"
The Tupelo journal., 1910-09-16

signature sssss ne q lIMzZzzzM
In Use For Over 80 Years.
The Kind You Have Always Bought.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1910-06-01
Winthrop College
SCHOLARSHIP and ENTRANCE
EXAMINATION

The examination for the award of
vacant scholarships in Winthrop
College and for the admission of
new students will be held at the
County Court House on / riday, Ju-
ly /, at 9 a. m. Applicants must
be not less than fifteen years of age.
When Scholarships are vacant after
July l they will be awarded to
those making the highest average at
this examination, provided they
meet the conditions governing the
award. Applicants for scholar
ships should write to President
johnson before the examination for
Scholarship examination blanks.
Scholarships are worth 500 and
free tuition. The next session will
open September 81, 1910, For
further information and catalogue,
address
Pres. D. B. Johnson,
Rock Hill, S. c..
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1910-06-01
I0 MINUTE 3HI|lE&
Robert Fulton.

~oBERT FULTON'S parents were
y SO poor that the future inventor
N had scarcely any education,
barely learning how to read and
write. His fatheg died when Robert
was three years old, and at an early
age the boy was ~apprenticed to a
Philadelphia jeweler. In addition to
his work in the shop. young Fulton
applied himself to portrait and land
scape painting and showedsuch talent
that he, was enabled to keep his wild
owed mother and In four years. bought
q farm on which he placed her. He
then went to London to prosecute the
study of his art as a painter. SO
strength bent had ne for science, how
ever, that in his odd hours he studied
mechanics and engineering. Finally
attracting the attention Of the Duke
Of Bridgewater, who was then Inter
ested in an extensive canal scheme,
Fulton was induced by that gentleman
to give up painting altogether and to
devote himself to civil engineering and
invention. J
In the next few years Fulton invent
ed an incline plane Tor s%uppanting ca
nal locks, mill for saving and polish
ing marble, a machine for spinning.
flax and another for making ropes
He also wrote a book on navigating
canals and another on the application
of steam to- navigation. AT about this
time he attracted the notice Of Edward
+. Livingston. United States minister
at Paris In response to an invitation
Fulton went to that city, where he
soon Invented q submarine boat which
he vaInly tried to have adopted 5by the
French, British and American govern,
ments. After his failure in this at
tempt, he returned to his dream Of
steam navigation and invented a small
boat which successfully navigated the
Seine. livingston was SO interested
that be advanced money to Fulton to
come4toSAmerica and build-a steam
>boat for. the Hudson. The result was
the Glermont, from whose first trip
between New York and Albany dates
the beginning Of q new era in the
water transportation of the world.
The Clermont marked the high tide
of Fultons success. he was forty-two
~yearssold at the time. and lived only
eight years longer. having been worn
out by the incessant toll Of his earlier
life. He had lived long enough, how
v to become one Of the immortals.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1910-06-01
LIVERY STABLE

I take this means of announcing
to the public that / have opened up
a first class livery business in the
stables at,the place formerly cccu..
pied by Mr.. E. j.. Minis on Main
street. Nrst-class teams furnished
on short notice. a.
7 will make a speciality of break
ing and handling colts. Have had
considerable experience in this kind
of work. Calm person or order
teams by telephone.
8. j. E. MINIS.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1910-06-01
TWO MINUTE SKETCHES
Daniel Webster.
By ,. q. EoeER

NERHAPS the crisis In Daniel
~ Webster's career was reached
Just after his admission to the
bar, when he was offered a
court %clerkship. At that time he was
very poor and had shown little Of the
wonderful o~ratorical ability which aft
! erward distinguished him. The tender
Of such q place vas therefore a sore
temptation. Webster, however. decid-
ed not to take 1t, stating that he in
tended to say things himself, not SIM
ply write things that other people said.
He began practicing in a small New
Hampshire town and remained a citi-
zen Of that state many years before
he> was finally discovered" and in
duced to locate In Boston. When Web
ster first tried to speak, he failed and
burst into tears. This was while he,
was still in school. So shy was he that
he could scarcely arise to recite. 1t
took Will power and perseverance to
overcome such a defect, and it was only
the fact that he felt his own greatpow-
ers that finally enabled him to succeed.
Even after he had overcome his
timidity the battle was only half won.
His first efforts were ornate and high
sounding, but contained little sub
stance. One local critic said they were
"full Of emptiness" Webster heard
Of the criticism, and it cut him, but
he had enough. common sense to recog-
nize the justice of the structure and to
profit by. It He resolved never again
to indulge in mere .oratory for its own
sake and to speak only when he had
something to say.
AS a boy on the farm Webster did
not. like to work, but when he got into
his own field he was on occasions a.
prodigious worker. When in school,
he was given a hundred lines Of yir-
gil to memorize. AL night he worked
and, when called upon to repeat what
he had learned, not only did 30, but
asked leave to give another hundred,
then still another hundred, after which
he stated that he was ready 10 repeat.
500 more.
With the modern Demosthenes-
personal appearance was more than
half the battle.