The log cabin Democrat., 1910-01-13
HIS WIFE LAUGHED

| mean? Every fireside the cradle of liberty as the feller says. Then along comes youI wife and rocks the cradle.
 No, sir, I'm a downy bird, am and take it from ne, this home sweet nome gig isn't going to cash any pol Icy slip I ever saw. Not until they do something to give women sense of humor.
 Now, get this right. They can ap- preciate a joke. You hear me. Some of the best laughers in the wide, wide world right TOW are wearing high-heeled shoes and imported hair.
 Yes, siree they can appreciate joke. If they can see it they can. That's it. There yru have it, son. Ii they can see it! That's the trouble. They seldom see it.
 Listen here Did you see her laugh as she went out? Eh? Well. sir, just told her joke, regular kind of a funny joke. Is she laughing at ry joke, son? SL1 is not. Then what the blazes is she laughing at? You don't know. I don't know, she don't know. Can you beat it? Answer: No, you cannot beat 1t.
 Its a good joke too. Heard ii downtown. Seems one O. the boys was up in Maine this summer and jp- as he was getting over to Ra' a'tlesnake creek he heard terrible swimming going on there. He went down to the shore and there on the other side of Rattlesnake creek was a big turtle crawling away.
 He says the turtle had two rings on his tail and one button on the end and his shell was mottled yellow ana red He says the two rings probably were for the turtle to go ahead be cause that's what the turtle was do Ing And when he saw the button on the end of the tail he knew he'd seen he turtles finish.
 That's some story. Eh? But listen hare. I got to thinking about that story and I up and asks him how he makes it out that turtle could have rings and a button on his tail. Rat tlesnakes are the only critters that have them He said that was easy because when he first saw the turtle on the other side of Rattlesnake creek he knew in an instant it was cross
 Do you get that? l guess that'n bad. By gum, it cost me dollar six ty to find out about that cross, but 1t was worth it. l took cigar myself, because I was coming right home and didn't want any argument. Here smoke that when you get outside Wife objects to the smell around the house
 Well, sir, says, says l. Home for mine, where in the sacred precincts of my own vine and fig tree, l says I'll hand that one over the plate to my soft-voiced spouse,' says I and il will tie her up,' I says, into shak ing and complicated tanele of blithe some merriment,' says | Likewise such being the case, l freely opined that my paths would be in sunny places and sweet peace would brood over me, to the third and fourth gen eration thereof. Selah,
 50 I came home, and take 1t from ne, gave it out to her in plain words. No hidden subtleties, you un derstand, but full of corroborative de tail and, believe me. son, with the bright light of truth and virtue flash ing from my clear blue eyes,
 You never heard me when l was right in top form, maybe? Well, son. the way I told her that story was right. See what I mean? The turtle wouldn't have had any comeback if he had heard it himself.
 And did she laugh? Did she give that imitation of complicated and tangled merriment? Not a sort Nothing of the kind Nix. She looked me square in the face and she said; Well, what about it.? says she GH ahead and tell the joke says she
 Say, that got me mad. l wouldn't have minded if she had been kidding. me, but sine wasn't. l was sore al over and I unhitched my righteous In dignation and began to hand things out all in bunch. I combed thing? over pretty general one way and an other until I'll give you my word, ]: couldn't think of anything more to say that dared to, women being rn- necessarily touchy at times.
 "'You're the limit I says, as kind of windup. I don't believe you ever saw a joke in your life, I says and you wouldn't laugh if you did, says.
 "'Henry,' she says just as sericas I don't know but one real funny jCac and I've known that a long tim. che says and every once in awhile laugh myself sick over it,' she says It's an awfully funny joke she says and one is enough for any woman she says. that's respectable she says
 "'Well, for the love of mackerei put me wise. says l. No, Henry she says, you wouldn't like it at all And besides,' she says, I don't wan to h rt your feelings she says. And