El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-09-03

ksDE ODDER night" said Mirandy'
May Jane was a-readln In
L. de paper about dat weddin
what dey had up IN Massachusetts
whar one'of de gifts TO de bride was
whole case of canned tongue
Oar now" sclaims Ike. when he
hears dat, EFF dat warn't sign an
token of good luck, den L don't know
none an 1 is de seventh son or
seventh. son an was born in caul-
Jumpin' Jehosipat, but dat bridegroom
sho'ly did have his rabbits foot wld
him, for I take hit dat de kind puSson
what presented all dat canned tongue
10 de bride was handin' her out a hint
dat she was to go an do likewise an
de mo- she kept her tongue bottled up
de better hit would be for de peace
an de happiness of de family
You amt got no particular meanin
to dem remarks. is you? inquiries 1. via
q meanin' look at him, for whilst l Is
meek. an humble woman eff dere IS
one. still dere's times when de worm
Will turn. an so when I hears Ike a
prognosticatin' about de beauty OF dat
canned tongue l Sorter sets up an De
gins to take notice. an den 1 says. you
amt a-fligin' no asparagus on nobody
character is youT
How Ike Regarded 1t.
..To he sho' not. to be sho' not" spoons
Ike Il was Jest a-thinkin' now ca m
an peaceful hit would be. do for a
man when he got in game an stayed
out later dan he intended or ef ne nap
pened 70 git mixed up wild too much
b5ooze as de best of us will sometimes,
an when he come a-meanderin home
along towards o'clock in de mawnln,
ef he had de blessed satisfaction OF
KNOWN dat he had one of deese mean
wives wild a canned tongue
..Yassurn." goes on Ike. Il specs dat
de voice dat breathed DER Eden. as de
HYMN book says. had a canned tongue
an I prognosticates dat his heah d.
vorsch evil is gwine to be squeIched
whenever women git TO keepln dere
tongues in cold storage iRsted of lay1n
dem on dere husbands whenever dem
no Dussicuted creters holds back a few
bones out of dere pay envelope OF a
Saturday night Lakwise. dis WorIe Is
gwinc to be mo- peaceabler place 10
live in when woman quit stickin deTe
tongues in dere neighbors business Me
for dat canned tongue business eVey
| time"
well" SAYS I. for hit sholy did rile
me de wav he talked. ''ef you don't
eniov nv conversation YOU don't have
IN lessen TO hit" an wild dat bein
prffict lady. I went out of de room
an barged de do behind me in a way
| dat said about 70 thousand cur words
But right den an dere | made up
nv mind dat I'd give Ike a dose OF DAT
canned tongue dat he was so stuck on,
| for I knowed dat eff dere is one thing
dat will drive n man to C,Ink sooner
dan anodder hit is one or desc mean
| dumb women dat amt got nothln 10
! say. an dat makes a house feel lax
deere was a funeral goin' on in hit all
de time. an dat you was de corpse.
so when 1 got super on the TAME
says to Ike:
ole man. says ], 1 ben thihkln
| about what YOU says about dat lovely
| lady wild de canned tongue. an Use
! gwine to follow her noble example.
From dis day on Use gwine 10 turn over
! = new leaf. an l amt gwine to scan
| dalize nv neighborS no mo, an am l
| gwine to pass no remarks on what you
do, no matter what hit is.
She Tried the Plan.
! pats right sclaims Ike always
knowed dat my influence was gwine TO
| lead YOU up to the higher life. sooner
or later. AMI bIesses Gawd dat Use done
lbeen able to pint you to de right road
| Wild dat. when we got through eatin
| Ike put his hat on de side of his haid,
an santered out as bold life TO de
crap game. an l never said a word. nor
| did I raise my voice when I let him in
| about o'clock in dc mornin' dat
soused dat he couldn't find de keyhOle.
! Neidermo' at breakfast did / hand him
| out my opinion OF a man dat was a
elder in de chu'ch, and de father of Il
| family, settin' dat sort of a example TO
| his innocent offspring, dough on such