The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1910-07-12
COACHED AT
A COURTING
By HARRY VAN AMBERG
Copyright. 1870. by American Press
Association.

was lounging beside me In wicker
chair. She is a good friend of mine.
Mrs. Poland. although her husband
aud ! were chums before they were
married. She has never been at oil
Jealous of me-something unusual In
such cases. She invites me to her cot
tage every summer and Is good enough
to say that she would not consider a
party complete without me.
| tell her I'm never complete with
out party.
Mrs. Poland has a hobby. II In
matchmaking. She tried to match me
several times and always failed. The
reason. she said. was that l did not
understand women.
81 have u girl for you." she said.
81 thought you had given me up"
II have so far as your management
Is concerned. This time I wish you to
leave your part of the affair to me-"
Now you're getting down to some
thing practical. Who Is the lady?"
"She comes tomorrow-Miss Apnabel
Vail She is pretty. intelligent. stylish
and has some means of her own,
though not much"
VERY well. So long as you keep me
instructed I'll do anything you like.
But be It understood that I'm to have
no headwork to do on my own account
You understand"
"Perfectly."
Miss Vail arrived as expected. She
was all Mrs. Poland had claimed for
her. On the afternoon of her arrival
Mrs. Poland Informed me that she ex-
pected me TO drive with her guest
The carriage would be at the door al
O'clock. | told her would be
| charmed to drive with Miss Vail II she
thought the young lady could endure
me without other company We drove
two hours and returned IN time 10
dress for dinner. During the evening
| Mrs. Poland asked me how | liked
Miss Vail. and | told her | had been
much pleased.
IL doubt It," she said "A man who
is much plenscd with II womnn can find
plenty to say to her. Miss Vail has
told me that you didn't say anything
but Yes aud No
IL was always good listener"
A sailing party was arranged for d
days outing on the water IN Poland's
yacht. Mrs. Poland instructed me be-
fore starting to devote myself almost
| exclusively TO Miss Vail My motto
was obey orders II you break own
ers." Miss Vail was very seasick, and
| escorted her to the side of the vessel
and held her head. She motioned me
away. but | chung to the job. Then,
when she sank back into reclining
| chair, considering that she was III |
concluded that l. must do all the talk
Ing myself talked Till she told me
If | would only go away aud let her
alone SHE would feel much relieved.
Mrs. Poland that evening told me
very impatiently that didn't know
how to make myself agreeable to II
girl. but II was impossible for any one
to teach me.
"Haven't done all you have told me
to doT' ! asked. very much crestfallen,
Goodness gracious, do you expect
your coach to follow you about to tell
you when to talk aud when to keep ST.
lentI Must you be worked like the
figures In Punch and Judy show?"
"Icrom what you say Miss Vail has
not been especially impressed with
me-"
II wouldn't say So except that 1t Ii
all up with your suit. but she snys
you're the most aggravating man she
ever met.
Cant we wipe Off the slate and be
gin all over?"
You'd be the same
"ldlot?'
Mrs. Poland was silent. She wa
scolding me us she would scod one o.
her own children whom she dearl.
loved. There was nothing more to b,
said by either of us, so we dropped
the subject,
Bridge was the game for the even
ing. and in order to show Mrs. PolanC
that was willing To do all In my pow
or 10 meet her wishes | invited Miss
. Vail to be my partner. She was very
stupid at cards, and when she trump
ed my tricks, although | said nothing
could not help looking grave. Thii
she interpreted M condemnation ant
after finishing n rubber arose and lief
the table. Mrs Poland was watching
us and AS soon as we were alone sale
10 me:
"What did you scold her for?"
"Scod her! | didn't say word"
"lIut you looked It,"
was discouraged made no reply
"You'll never win that girl In tn
world You needn't try any more I,
please me- give II up"
The next day Mrs. Poland was yer,
cross with me. asked her IL ! hat
' offended further. She said that
had not. but Miss Vail was so offend
Il ed with me that she was intending t
: cut short her visit.
d That's TOO bad" | replied. "Not 10
:. the world would | consent TO remai
your guest after having driven a CUES