davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

From the Kansas City Journal
If President Taft succeeds in restoring harmony in
the party and bringing an faction. Insurgents
and regulars into line % win the battle this
year FOR Republican principles by gaining the con-
fdence u the public in the party's policies and
plans he will have pitched the greatest game Of
politics that has ever been played in this country.
He has started upon his task in brave and op-
timistic spirit q good viii and superb confidence
He deserves 20 win If ever a President did.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Names representation.

From the Boston Transcript
The retirement o. Hale makes IL more than ever
incumbent upon Maine 10 strengthen It's repre-
sentation in both houses Of Congress. Senator Fryc.
on account Of age has erased 10 b. an important
factor. and the four Maine Representatives. while
good men. would never be mistaken FOR Reed Ding
ley, Boutellc, and MIliken, the delegation Of for
mer period Asher G.. Kinds who has lately been
much In the public eye II elected from the Fi7st
district, would do something toward restoring the
old tradition
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
SPRING.

Sing hey. the merry springtine
And the dainty dahodils.
Sing hey, the blooming tilips
Aud the fragrant. grecning hillsl
Sing hey. the merry picnic
And the browsing dronirg bees.
Sing hey. the-ahh-h-h-hchoOo-o-o-o
Gosh blame. Another sneezei
RALPH LEE.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Compulsory NInstnchcs-

In the Austrian army mustaches have
been made compulsory, or. rather, an old
ordinance 10 this effect has been re-
vived by a rescript from the war min
lstry. fl is said. on the personal wish
Of the Emperor. The original compul-
sorry mustache order dates from IyiS
its author being Gen. Count CyulaI. the
successor Of the famous Radetzkv in the
war with the Italian States. who him
self possessed an immense flowing mus
tache, and who wanted every man In the
army 20 grow one Of like proportions.
The order al the same time uphoIds the
exclusive privilege enjoyed by the Wind
ischgratz Regiment Of Dragons. which
distinguished itself in the hattie %
Kolin, where Frederick the Great was
defeated in 1867. in memory Of vh.cr
they we're allowed 20 shave. Since trs-
there has not been a mUstacAe .- gae
regiment
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

A TUNEFUL SKIT.

Would Congress make & hity
Let e quit.
Let Congress 90 away back
And sit
Down ard take a rcsti
It's a nuisance ard a past;
And no ono would sigh a single sigh
for II.
Besides. IT'S ell balled up and badly
split;
And it's time Tor il 20 flicker and
10 fit
So. Congress. speaking plainly.
But botA senab,y ard sanely.
It's ap to you 10 pack your grip
sack now and git
u GUS KARGER.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
A Poor Excuse.

From the Buffalo Express.
Il suppose" said his wife. as he sneak
ed IN at 6 in the morning. that you will
tell me you stayed up with a sick friend. A"
NO. my dear he answered: Il merely
stayed up 10 see Halley's comet"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

'Mr. Aldridge is as big a man to-day
as he would be II he had been elected
10 Congress- says the Albany Journal.
Perhaps. Doubtless that IS one reason
why he was not elected 10 Congress.
moreover.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

It was considered quite a joke when old
King Louis Of France once upon a time
advised his loyal subjects 10 eat grass.
At that time. however. nobody had
thought OF the vast possibilities incident
20 the exploitation Of breakfast foods.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

To-day, Congress IS going 20 adjourn
soon; tomorrow. It VIII not adjourn
until far into the summer. And yet. no.
body is clamorinE for Congress 10 remain
I'm session any longer than Is absolutely
necessary.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Conservative always. we advance the
suggestion that the Democrats probably
are as much as one-tenth of / per cent
more apt to win the next House than
Washington IS 70 win this years base
ball pennant. anyway
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

The abolition Of the House OF Lords has
been postponed until after Bwana Jumbo
gets out Of the country. anyway. Unless,
Of course. that gentleman decides that It
is up TO him TO put that Job over while he
is In the neighhorhoOd.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
OF Course Not.

Why don't you cut out the booze.
old man? There's nothing in f."
L imbibe for pleasure, my friend
don't expect my personal amusements 10
yield me a dividend"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Don't You Relieve II.

From the Youngstown Telegram.
The report that Senator Drpow. too. may retire
shortly sounds familiar. Surely We have heard II
before.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

The tail Of Halley's comet is reported
to be dragging along behind in a manner
far from graceful. One would think
from the rate IL IS travelling, that the
comet surely would have its tail UP and
over the dashboard
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
The Inventor.

You say he has covered the field Of
aviation2'
Thoroughly. Every bird that flies In
fringes on one OF his patents"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

From the ST. Louis Star.
Mr. Bryan's request that no demonstration b.
made over his return to the United States seems 10
have been fully and heartily complied with. Few
people know that he Is back yet This general pub
lie acauisscence IN a simple request By mere pri-
yate citizen Is touching.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

seen in other instances. Better that each
man be occupied than that he seek rec
reation which in the end proves detri-
ment to himself and 70 his compeers.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

From the Wheeling Intelligence.
The Daughters Of tho American Revolution seem
10 be trying to prove worthy Of the name.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
PoasibIe BeneAts.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger.
II the hope Of Mr. Knox Of seeing the world dis
armed should be realized there would be cannon
available for every park in the country.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
When the Tide Recedes.

From the ST. Louis star
Wickcrsham Is confident that the insurgent move
ment will subside. Ever notice what food leaves
strewn on the banks Of a river after Euhsidngl
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

a returning Roosevelt saying TO Mr. Taft.
Il left a strong. militant, harmonious
party, William" Which is precisely what
he did not leave.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

As for Uncle joe" however. he will
enact the role Of the boy standing on
the burning deck, II essary-enact It
to the very finish and then some, per-
haps,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

IF your wife is a suffragette, hiss her
biscuits, and see how she likes it," adj
vises the Detroit Free Press. But IL she
is a sufragette. there probably will not
be any of her biscuits to hiss
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

A Chicago woman went after her hus-
bands affinity" with an umbrella Go
II. sister, More power to your good
right arm. and may your shadow never
grow Less
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Very Serious.

I'VE demand a new trial
con what grounds
THE judge sneezed during the first
hearing OF the case"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

1t is mighty hard work for the Demo-
cratic donkey to go out nowadays and
not see bunch Of rainbows in any old
direction
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Ethics of True Comedy.

I'm sorry I quit burlesque for so
ciety drama. I amt getting the laughs
these days"
Get back 20 the first principles, my
boy. Bin some body every time you utter
an eplgTam."
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Nor do we believe that Oklahoma Has
ken = likely TO cut much ice in the next
Democratic campaign
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

,suu. If. after all, climbing Mount Nc
Kinley is such an easy matter. why may
not old Or. Cook have performed the
feat. just as he says he did?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Now that the Philadelphia strike has
been called off, a lot OF people are Won
dering why 10 ever was called on.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
The Handy Helper.

Oh. woman has resourceful trend.
Can tinker some.
There are few things she cannot mend
With chewing gum.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Roosevelt is walking Fourth Of July
celebration" says the San Antonio Elk
press. And he does not invariably con-
fine his gait TO a walk, moreover.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

The next time Mr. Mann moves a night
session Of the House. he should be put
under bond to answer roll call
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Granny Hunt IS 50 busy getting
conventions 20 come TO Washington
that he threw the census man out
II his house when he asked him his
business,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

THE world is n stage. but most or US
are scene shifters." observes the Scran-
ton Tribune Or "supes"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Tnsted Like homemade.

From the Bcstcn Trarsziri.
Mrs Caller-This m-nce pie is simply
deliciousl May have your receipt for IL?
Mrs. IRne-Certainly. dear. don't think
the baker will ask US 10 pay for it again
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

When he census man SGT a Food
look a. Billy Henshsw's bald head.
he expressed doubt as 70 the age
Eiven-thiT-y-TW
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Courts have decided that hash is not
merchandise" notes the Richmond News
Leader. It requires considerable cour-
age 70 say what hash is not.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
In the Swim.

Congratulations. old chap. You are
seen everywhere with Lord Bunkhurst."
Yes; I have rented him for the sea-
SON
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
CHAT OF THE FORUM.
A Good Habit

From the Milwaukee sentinel.
In keeping with daily custom Of years standing
Roosevelt breaks into print this morning
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Merritt Chances pedigree hIlcT
two pages u the census mans book
and it wasn't from the size q Mer-
ritt's family.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Cornelius Eclhardt was shocked
almost 20 madness when the census
man asked him Il he had said he
lad been married three tines
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Are the Daughters OF the American
Revolution insurgins again or yet?" IN
CURES the Atlanta Constitution Both,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

skunk skins have advanced go per
cent" notes a contemporary. Well
thank heaven, not 900 per scent. any
way.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Landslides IN the Thirty-second New
York Congressional district also show
which way the wind is blowing.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

So far. the comet is not making so
very many people get up and take notice.
we fear.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
AT THE HOTELS.

"Of all the foreigners in China. the
American is looked upon with greater
favor by the natives and the government
than residents VINO are subjects Of other
Western nations" said Dr. David L.
Anderson, president Of the Soochow Uni
yersity Soochow. China at the Raleigh
last night Soochow University is under
the control Of the Methodist Church
South. and DR.. Anderson. who has been
a resident OF China the last twenty
seven years. is a native Of Atlanta. Ga.
lie is here 70 attend the annual confer
ence Of his church
'Soochow University has about 900 stu
dents and Is looked upon with the great
est favor by the provincial as well as
imperial government The institution is
parouized by the best families. and IT'S
commandments are honored with the
presence Of the viceroy Of the province.
as well as other high government Of
fcials- Soochow IS about fifty miles
distant from Shanghai.
The curriculum of the university Is
the same as that OF a first class college
in the United States. The courses in
what is called in China the new move
ment are given in English. while the
classical HISTORICAL philosophical. and
other courses are iu charge OF Chinese
professors. The students are fond OF out
door sport. and have their regular ath-
leuc meets. the same as in America.
The university is not a charitable insti-
tuition and is not confined TO Christians.
In fact, Christians are by far in the mi
nority. Every one pays for the courses
he takes.
"A thing 20 bring closer the United
States and China would be 70 give the ex-
clus.on law a more liberal Interpretation.
China does not ask for the abrogation
Of the exclusion act, but IL would Ike 20
see that her students. merchants. and
better class were allowed ingress in the
United States the same as other foreign
ers, and without being obliged 10 undergo
the humiliation Of much red tape.
There never has been much japanese
influence in China, only az the c0nclu-
sion OF the Russo-Japanese war" added
DIR. Anderson. The Chinese don't think
much Of the japanese. and they are get
ting rid OF the japanese instructors who
were engaged following the war as soon
as possible. Il is % be regretted that
the United States assumes an attitude
as If afraid Of Japan. That lowers
American prestige In China very much
DR.. Anderson said he did not believe
that the reported outbreak against mis-
sions in certain parts Of China amounted
70 anything serious.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

VIII Parks says he viii leave town
before he answers all the questions
q the census tlker-
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

win GUIDE denies that his family
eonstitntes hall a the population
Of PetWOrth.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

ChH Long gives his permanent
residence as l5I3 New York avenue.
Bachelor, Business, chauffeur,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

r. n. Warner tod the census
man that he was uncertain as to
his place Of residence, but his blsi-
ness vas fat builder and politician.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Henry Hanford IS in hiding. He
is so popular with the girls that he
hates the idea Of telling the census
man that be is married.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

4 friend 81 ours named Hoover
got furious when his wife insisted 70
the census man that she was the
head q the house and he was only
the head Of a hrm down town
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

George Judd thought the sweet
girl who was taking the census in
his district was n solicitor for a
church fair and handed her a bunch
Of money.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

When the census man asked J.
Dawson Williams II be was mar
ned. Dawson blushed. said no. but
soon
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

When the census man called on
Harry c. {. {. c. c. stiles. Harry
thought he IVES Up against 4 book
agent, and Immediately ordered two
sets.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
A Htfor
EverytIeaA
EVERY SATURDAY..

Our Motto: lfyou sec il 10 The BIZ
Sud-. il isn { necessarily so.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Yea Lacrosse. Nscs. the West has
70 Better example 20 NEa, changes can
be brought scc-- I- q generation than -1
t-s ease ~ tas Russian Nenuonites,
S1l3 Charles y. Clark. OF kansas City.
Who IS ar trs New Willard. Thirty
years asc the E-St settlers came TO kan
SaS ves-.-S Sreepsb;1 coats, Russian caps
and boots They ru6dlc5 on the station
platforms ard could speak no English
They were afraid OF the customs Of Amer
.ca and acted as IL fearing 70 be jailed
or the slightest p-eteNt-
The other day continued N-. Clark.
zen touring cars were drawn up IN q
country road. and every one Of them
was owned and driven hv a Russian. all
sons % the men and women who huid,ed
IN sheepSkins a third Of a century ago
In December and January certain
hardware dealer IA the little town OF Otis
IN the midst OF the Russian settlement
sold atty automobiles. nearly all 20 farm
crs. They paid cash for them. too and
are getting q good deal OF pleasure out
OF their new playthings. Wheat did f.
In tho early DAYS the Mennonites skimped
and saved, always living on less than
they earned. though the income was
small They had few wants, and their
farms were well titled They lived. and
many OF them yet 1--we. in colonies. The
towns are the dwelling places and the
farms are managed al a distance"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Benny Guy suspected that the
census man was a Bzdstreet IN
vestisatcr. and positively refused 20
give information a. 70 how many
houses he owned.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

When the ccnsgs mar approached
VIII Galliher, W.ll thought he was
a committee o. one coming 10 ask
him 20 act as marshal Of a parade.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

When the census man called on
Cuno Rudolph. Cuno though he
was a reporter. ard REUSED 10 give
an interview on the proposed change
in tho form Of the District govern
ment
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

Read the Bingvills Busls Tomorrow.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23

". 2. GaFney. Of Seattle. a retired
business man. is at the Raleigh. AI-.
Ganney came here 20 place his daughter
IN one Of the finishing schools. and viii
return home to-day 1lr. Ga1ney has
been in Cuba on pleasure trip. and in
discussing conditions in that island said
that time should be given 20 the Cgbans
20 establish their government on G firm
basis: that they are new and i1expe-
rienced in self-governmeHt. but that they
are doing satisfactorily.
"A peculiar condition exists in the Isle
Of Pines said Mr.. Gaffrev. About IS
per cent Of the inhabitants are Americans
and yet the island is governed by Cuba
The Americans are not Cuban citizens,
and are, therefore. excluded from taking
part IN the government. They are salts
fed however. as they receive the hest
treatment az the hands OF the officials.
The taxes hardly amount 10 anything.
End I have no doubt that within a short
time everything will suit the Ameri cans.
Speaking about Seattle. Mr.. Garney
said that business is good. and that the
exposition which not long ago closed q
successful season had done much 20
advertise the town and attract capital
and enterprise.
Mr.. Garney said that President Taft
+ is popular on the Pacific Coast.
How about Mr.. Roosevelt"
ron. well. that's a different proposition,
YOU know the West has always liked
/ NJ. Roosevelt. We are immensely proud
OF him
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-04-23
Welded for
the UPlih
TWO CENTS
CENSUS ECHOES.


When The census man r0t Ecod
look az Billy Henshsw's bald head.
Re expressed doubt as 70 the age
Cornelius Eckhardt was shocked
almost 20 madness when the census
man asked him Il he had said he
bad been married three tines
Granny Hunt IS 50 busy getting
20 come TO Washington
that he threw the census man out
Il his house when he asked him his
business.
Merritt Chances pedigree hIleT
two pages q the census mans book
and It wasn't from the size q Mer-
ritt's family.
VIII Parks says he viii leave town
before he answers all the questions
q the census t1ker-
WIN GUIDE denies that his family
constitutes half a the population
Of Petworth.
Henry HanfoCd IS in hiding. He
is so popular with the girls that he
hates the idea Of telling the census
man that be is married.
When the census man asked ].
Dawson Williams II be was mar
ned. Dawson blushed. said no, but
soon
CHH Long gives his permanent
residence as l3I3 New York avenue.
Bachelor, Business, chauffeur.
r. n. Warner tod the census
man that he was uncertain as to
his place Of residence, but his biSi-
ness vas fat builder and politician.
wheu the census man called On
Harry c. {. c. c. C. stiles. Harry
thought he IVES Up against 4 book
agent, and Immediately ordered two
sets.
George Judd thought the sweet
girl who was taking the census in
his district was n solicitor for a
church fair and handed her a bunch
Of money.
A friend q ours named Hoover
got furious when his wife insisted 70
the census man that she was the
head q the house and he was only
the head Of a hm down town
When the census mar approached
VIII GaIliher. Win thought he was
a committee q one coming 10 ask
him % act as marshal Of parade.
Benny Guy suspected that the
census man was a Budstreet In
vesiigatcr. and positively refused 20
give information a. 70 how many
houses he owned.
When the census man called on
Cuno Rudolph. CunO thought he
was a reporter. ard REUSED 70 give
an interview on the proposed change
in tho form Of the District govern
ment.
The Arvada enterprise., 1910-12-09
$3.50 RECIPE CURES
j WEAK KIDNEYS, FREE
RELIEVES URINARY AND KIDNEY
TROUBLES, BAckAcHE, STRAIN
z ING, SWELLING, ETC.
Stops Pain In the Bladder, Kidneys
and Back.

Wouldn't 1t be nice within a week or SO
to begin to say goodbye forever to the
scalding. dribbling. straining, or too fire.
quent passage of urine; the forehead and
the back-of-the-head aches; the stitches
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have a recipe for these troubles that
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DR.. A. e. Robinson. K-254 Luck Building.
Detroit, Mich, and I will send 1t by re-
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