The Washington herald., 1910-05-09
THE RECIPIENT GRATEFUL.

What pity there IS no school FOR train
ing girls how TO receive gift There IS
an art In being a graceful recipient. and
few there be who possess II. writes Helen
Bruce Wallace, in the Philadelphia Press.
Have you never given a present that
you heartily wished back before the
strings are cut on the wrapper? II not.
you have never met the girl who looks
when you hand her gift as II you were
doing her an insult?
Gratitude may he intense. but the re-
cipient has not learned TO look her part
Perhaps shyness or lack o. ease Is TO
blame, but results are as unpleasant as
though the girl really were furious that
you dared to give her a present
Equally trying IS the girl who takes
gifts as a matter Of course. Tier thank
YOU is so pcrfunctory and she shows such
palpable lack Of interest as TO the con-
tents Of the parcel. that again you wish
your money back In your purse
Worse yet is she who Is gushing until
she sees what you fave given her then
lets her countenance and her voice both
show her disappointment. II is an embar-
you actually begrudge that gift
There is the girl who appears grateful
both before and after viewing. but the
next minute disposes Of your gift so
cerelessly that you realize that her
gratitude is from the lips only
or that other girl whose manners are
better than her memory. You think. "at
last have 7 made a hit" so graciousIy
and gratefully IS your present received
In the course Of an hour you have the
pleasure Of hearing her declare your gift
rather-its type-the one thing she can
not stand.
OF course, II IS unconscious and the
girl. when she realizes her break" is
hopclessiy embarrassed. but once more
you wish you hadn't been so generous.
And the other girl who regulates her
thanks on the value basis. She takes on
a marked increase Of gratitude so soon
as she can spot the sterling, or can by
a surreputious lick taste pure gold.
Who OF US has not been half thanked
for some novelty that girl does not
know is the latest wrinkle" It Is not
until some more sophisticated friend
raves over the new possession that a
decent amount OF gratitude can be sum-
moned.
Then II the girl is not especially clever
she shows her hand by gushing that
makes you long TO slap her for the
covert insult to your good taste and
knowledge Of fashion.
Worse than TO be half thanked Is 20
be overthanked. There are girls who
fairly slather thanks. They rave un-
meaningly and increasingly until you
know they cannot possibly mean #. II
you cannot doubt their sincerity. so
wearing Is the gratitude and such bad
form that you secretly determine not TO
bring down such an avalanche again.
The recipient graceful does not overdo.
She is cordial, not effusive; is grateful
for the thought rather than the gift; can
conceal disappointment even In the face
Of atrocious taste: above all. does not
act as IL she were conferring a favor on
the giver by accepting her presents.
Some girls err in this respect by think
ing It shows an Independent spirit to hold
back when a gift is made or a favor
is offered. They say: II cannot pos
sibly accept such a thing! Oh, I couldn't
let you spend all that on met
What such girls need is for the giver
10 some time take them at their word
and withdraw the gift. Their boasted
independence would suffer a sudden col
lapse and their manners would improve.
The girl who must be most careful 70
be a graceful recipient is she who has
wealthy friends. The poor and proud
spirit can be overdone 10 the point OF
actual brutality. While a nice girl can
not afford to sponge. she should not re-
fuse 20 her friends what is often their
greatest pleasure-the making Of pres
ents that girl could not afford to buy.
1t is sometimes hard for the receiver.
truth must admit. Favors are not al
ways as tactfully offered as they are
we'll meant; but unless the donor is in
sufferably patronizing the spirit. not the
manner of the giving, should be taken
into account.
There are times when one is excusabIe
for not being a graceful receiver. IL
there is any hint Of a purpose in the Civ
ing; II the slightest taint Of graft is sus-
pected; il by receiving a girl places her
self under ill-advised obligation. she
should refuse 10 be q recipient at all