davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28
HUMOp or THE DAY

Tommy-Tell me a fairy tale. Guest
Once man who had baby that didn't
cry and a dog that didn't bite went to
Harper's Bazaar.
"Now, children. what is this?', asked
the teacher, holding UP the picture of a
zebra. 1T looks to me like a horse in
bathing suit answered a little bCy.-Our
Dumb Animals.
as he a capable rnan?' II should say
ne Is. He can ipang pictures to his wife's
entire satisfaction."- Free Press.
Professor-what charming caildrenl
They are twins, 1 presume? Fond Mother
yours?-Chicago News.
n,s Rc ~ did y you like the eantata last
tertainment we went out and had some
lobster but there was no canneti-what-
you-cailed-it on the menu."-st. Louis
Star.
Kind L4ady-My poor man what would
you do with the money IL I gave you a
picture postcard an write yer a note O.
thanks.-Cleveland Leader.
replied Bronco Bob Il thought there
had been an accident and the c5ok had
who is the man who is so loudly and
theoretically opposing restrictions ON
automobiling speeding? don't recollect
having seen him among the motorists be-
fore" You haven't. He's not a motorist;
he's undertaken" -Baltimore American
Heard at the Beach-She-How much
do you love me2 He-How much9 Why.
I couldn't love you any more if every one
of your freckles was a $50 gold piece
Boston Transcript.
Must Be Specific.-"Who was It kissed
you in the arbor last EVENING" What
time ?"-Simp licissimus.
Servant-May I come in and dust your
room? Poet-Heavens. woman, I am
rapt in thought Servant-L1or' air, 1 am
glad I knocked first!-Casselps Saturday
Journal.
The Luck OF the Draw.-The mistress
was giving Harriet the benefit OF her adj
vice and counsel, touching a monentous
step the latter contemplated. "Of course.
Harriet" said the lady of the house, iii
you intend to get married, that's your own
business; but you mustn't forget that mar
Tiage Is very serious matter Wis
num- said Harriet. "Yis mum. I know
tbs, sometimes mum. But, mum mayba
I'll have better luck than you did, num- -
Brooklyn Life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28
FROA O7EER PENS
INTELLECTUAL DISHONESTY.

INTELLECTUAL DISHONESTY.
Honesty does not consist wholly of
the ability of one to keep his hands
out of other peoples pockets, however
laudable such achievement may be on
the part of anybody. More harm IS
done to society by the intellectual dis
honesty of its leaders than is done by
any common thief or CRATER. The man
who is Intellectually dishonest robs
himself as well as the whole people
What is intellectual dishonesty? Gen
orally 1t is seen in politicians who in
their mad endeavors to get office de-
liberately argue for what they know
is wrong, advocating certain principles
because they are popular, although
logically unsound. Intellectual dishon-
esty manifests itself in a willingness to
advocate for material reasons what one
knows intellectually to be wrong.
A thief who takes a pocketbOok is
as nothing compared to him who steals
anothers good name, as the greatest
poet declared, and so, too, is a COM
mon thief guilty of small wrong in
comparison with the man who intel
lectually leads his followers astray, and
knows that he is so doing. Honesty is
not simply a desirable thing. 1t is a
necessary thing. Many men who have
been perfectly honest financially have
failed in the higher intellectual test
Charleston News and Courier.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Jefferson M. Levy, a congressman
elect from New York, already has a
corps of stenographers at work draft
ing bills he proposes to introduce dur
ing the Sixty-second congress which
does not convene for a year yet. He
aims to introduce more bills than any
other member in congress. This is
one sort of congressional activity
which does not count for much
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press
Money warps character; envy poisons
the soul.
Good qualities hang back forever; bad
ones come bursting out.
A girl needs her whole face to smile
but she can wink with the finest corner
of her eye.
The average man is SO blind he can
see what's good for him, even when it s
being kicked out of public office.
Grown-upS catch marriage Just the way
children do the measles, and lots of them
are just as anxious to get over It.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Every effort should be made to put
the Smith Automobile company on it's
feet and keep it in Topeka. 1t is an
industry that is of great value to city.
Each Smith car that is being operated
in various sections Of the country. and
there are many such, is an advertise
ment for the town.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Andrew Carnegie was 70 years old the
other day. And unless he is booked
to beat the longevity record made by
Methusaleh he viii have to shell out his
coin faster than he has been doing if
he is to make good that boast of a few
years AGO that he intended to die a
poor man. But maybe the canny Scot
was bIuffing. Men have been known
to do such things before.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Those people who are holding up their
hands in horror at the number of seri-
Gus and fatal football accidents which
occurred during the season just closed,
would probably faint away If they only
took the trouble to keep track of the
serious and fatal accidents which are
happening these days in the hunting
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

"Ohio," says the Indianapolis Star,
"would think it a fair geographical dis
tribution for the nominees in 1912 to be
Taft and Harmon" Ohio would prob
ably like it better If the nominees Of
the Socialists, the Populists and the
Prohibitionists could also come from
within its confines
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Mexico's revolution appears to have
had no more substance than a soap
bubble And the present indications
are that much of the fighting and
''bloodshed" occurred merely in the
imagination of the newspaper CORES
pondents, or in the tips that were given
to them by the chief Mexican insurgent,
Mr. MaderO
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

It Is to be hoped that the expert
testimony which is being presented to
the interstate commerce commission
in freight rate inquiry will not be of
the same confusing sort as is bulk of
the expert" testimony that is given
from time to time in the courts of the
land
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Jack johnson has been arrested in
New York on a most serious charge
II he doesn't mend his ways the chances
are that the next fight for the cham
pionship in the heavyweight pug class
will have to be staged in some prison.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

President Taft gave only few hours
to celebrating Thanksgiving day. 1t is
difficult to figure out, though, how any
one could give more than a few hours
to Thanksgiving festivities when the
turkey provided for him weighed but
81 pounds, and especially when he had
10 divide 1t up among quite a large
FAMILY
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

were naturally equipped with bath
tubs. UP to date. however, the bath
tubs have been used only as coal bins
O receptacles for a varied assortment
of link
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

If the United States is not at all pre-
pared for war, as Major General Wood
chief of the army's staff insists in his
annual report, the people of the United
States have a right to know what the
army and navy has been doing during
the past few years with the several
hundred millions of dollars that have
been expended for military purposes.
Will General Wood, or some other ex-
pert in the premises, please explain?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28
KANSAS COMAENT
GOD BLESS OUR DAD.

We happened into a nome the OIner
night. and over the parlor door saw
the legend worked in letters of red.
w nat is Home Without a Mother? '
Across the room was another brief,
God bless our Home"
Now what's the matter with God
Bless our Dad!' He gets up early.
lights the fire, boils an egg, and~wipes
the dew off the lawn with his boots
while many mother is sleeping. He
makes the weekly hand-out to the
butcher, the milkman and the baker,
and his pile is badly demolished be-
fore he has been home an hour.
If there is a noise in the night, Dad
is kicked in the back, and made to go
down stairs and find the burglar and
kill him. Mother darns the socks, but
Dad bought the socks in the first place
and the needles and yarn afterwards.
Mother does up the fruit Dad bought
it all, and jars and sugar cost like the
mischief.
Dad buys the chicken for Sunday
dinner, serves them himself, and
draws the neck from the ruins after
everybody else is served. What is
Home Without a Mother2" Yes that's
all right, but What is Home With
out q Father ?" Ten chances to one
it's a boarding house; father is under
slab, and the landlady is the widow.
Dad, here's to you! You've got your
faults, you may have lots of 'em, but
you're all right, and We'll miss you
when you're gone.-Harveyville Moni-
tor.
THE SENATORIAL MELEE.
1t looks like things are shaping up
for a regular monkey-and-pa kind
of time in Kansas in 1912, when the
election of United States senator is to
take place. OF course, Senator Curtis
will be a candidate to succeed himself
and Governor Stubs has been an
avowed candidate for two years. But
his decreased majority for governor
last week has badly BACKED the eye
of his boom. Victor Murdoch wants
it so bad he can taste it. and now his
friends and hackers think 1t is time
for him to announce himself and get
busy at setting up the pins. Judge
Charles q. Lobden of western Kansas
has backing and influence, and some
self-appointed press agents are already
writing him up top f-column-next- to-
reading matter. Lobdell is Regular
and one of the best men in the state.
Hayes White of the Sixth district. an
Insurgent, would also like to be SEN
ator. 1t is plain to be seen that there
will be something doin' in senatorial
matters two years hence, and Gov
ernor Stubs is going to have all kinds
of trouble.-Howard Courant.
BRAG LESS.
If you have received a kindness, re-
member it. If you have done a kind
act forget it. We know this is con-
trary to custom, for every day we hear
some one Dragging how much he or she
has done for a neighbor, and at the
same time bewailing the fact that the
action was not appreciated. A short
time ago we heard a man Dragging
! that he had done a great deal for q
| certain woman in town. On being
| asked what he had done, he replied
| hn hp her 70 mil yr
washing. If the truth were known, the
| fact would probably be proved that she
did it at a mighty low figure.-Lucas
/ Independent.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

1t occurs to the New York World
that Massachusetts, would prefer its
Lodge in some vast wilderness rather
than In washington,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Mrs. Russell Sage is going to build a
model "spotless town" as a memorial
to her husband. She might well
come to Topeka and get a few pointers
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Topeka hunters are meeting with un-
usual success this fall in the fields
and woods according to the advertise
ments Of the local sporting goods
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28
AVERT THE STRIKE.

Unless our political system is a sham
and our social and economic civiliza-
ton a failure, there ought to be a
common ground where capital that
furnishes the job and labor that does
the work shall meet upon the level
and part upon the square" But from
many quarters come tidings and ru-
mors of strikes, to the chaos of BUSH
ness, and. what is worse, to the dis
tress of the poor. who live by daily
wage.
Why can not these two be friends,
brothers-employer and employee ?
There is q screw loose somewhere, and
the time is nigh at hand when 1t must
be oiled and frightened. TIL, high cost
of living forces labor to ask an in
creased wage. The Industrial concerns,
including transportation companies
and the gigantic manufacturing plants,
declare that their incomes Will not al
low further cost of production or adj
vance in the cost of fetching and car
rying from producer to consumer
Suppose a strike, a general strike, of
the employees of 81 great railroad
lines come? What would follow? The
loss of millions by both capital and
| labor.-Washington Post
WANTED-HEALTH BRIDES.
The appearances are that in the
future Swiss brides will be required
to present a certificate of health to
their bridegrooms, so that if any man
marries a girl whose health is not
good he will have himself to blame.
Next year, if the rich and infiuen-
| tial body called the Swiss Society of
Public Utility for Women, which has
done much good in Switzerland dur
| ing the last few years, has its way, all
young women, we'd or unwed, will be
physically examined, as are their
| brothers who enter the Swiss Army.
According to its report for 1910,
| the society has launched this daring
scheme, which is said to be receiving
warm support.
1--WE feel ourselves responsible for
| the health, the homes and the charac-
tiers of our people," the report says in
dealing with the suggested measure.
| 1t further urges every young woman
to undergo the ordeal for the sake OF
herself, her husband and Switzerland
Los Angeles Times
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

The fact that a prize fight. which
turned out to be a particularly vicious
one. was opened with prayer in Ohio
the other day is nothing very much for
Ohioans or any one else to enthuse over
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

That it is pretty hard work to teach
old dogs new tricks is emphasized
again by some news from Gary, Ind.
Modern houses were erected there by
the steel trust for it's employees, many
Of whom are foreigners. These houses
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

The State Journal Is q member Of the
Associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report OF that great news or
ganization for the exclusive afternoon
publication IN Topeka
The news Is received In The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

ALTHOUGH history does not bear us
out in the belief, we are firmly con-
WINGED that Sfsyphus was the originator
of the allegation that a rolling stone
gathers no moss. That his JOB was
an endless one is of no particular i'm
portance, as many of the unfortunate
moderns are up against the same
proposition,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Tommy-Tell me a fairy tale. Guest
Once man who had baby that didn't
cry and dog that didn't bite went to
live III a suburb without mosquitoes
Harper's Bazaar.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

"Who is the man who is so loudly and
theoretically opposing restrictions on
automobiling speeding? 1 don't recollect
having seen him among the motorists be
he's an r."-Baltimore American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Heard at the Beach.-She-How mucl
do you love me? He-How rnuchg Why
I couldn't love you any more if every ont
of your freckles was $50 gold piece
Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

''why don't you eat your cavier?" ask
ed the host. Didn't know it was TO eat"
replied Bronco Bob: Il thought there
spilled the bird shot."-Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Kind L4ady-My poor man what would
you do with the money If I gave you a
penny? Tired Hobo-Madam, I'G buy a
picture postcard an write yer note o.
thanks.-C1eveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Must Be Specific.-"Who was It kissed
you in the arbor last EVENING" What
time ?'-Simplicissimus.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

''How did you like the cantata last
night?' Il didn't try it. After The en-
tertainment we went out and had some
lobster, but there was no canned what
you-oalled-it on the menu.'-St. Louis
Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Servant-May I come in and dust you
room? Poet-Heavens. woman, ar
rapt in thought Servant-Lor', air, an
glad I knocked first!-CasselPs Eaturda
Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

as he a capable rnan?'' II should say
he is. He can hang pictures to his wife's
entire satisfaction" Detroit Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

"Now, children. what is this?" asked
the teacher, holding UP the picture of
zebra. 1T looks to me like a horse in
bathing suit" answered a little bCy.-Our
Dumb Animals.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

Professor-What charming children :
They twins 1 presume? Fond Mother
Yes. Observation-Disclosures they both
yours ?-Chicago News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1910-11-28

The latest largest bear story comes
from Monticello, N. Y. A com 9lete
alibi for Dave Leahy has been e8tab-
| lished. He was at his desk in To peka
! when the dispatch arrived.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30
The sun.

The show at the Sun the last half
of the week is one which is full of
laughs all through. OF the four acts
two of them are replete with comedy,
while music, singing novelty work
and dancing are also to be had in
plenty. There is not serious min
ute in the bill which is I'm keeping
with the approaching New Year when
everybody is supposed to be light, gay
and happy Chester and Grace, juve-
nile singers and dancers, are the head
line feature, while Wagner and Diggs
furnish fine sketch full of clean
comedy. W. II. Mills, character
change artist, introduces some very
fine presentations. John Mangel,
the boy with the educated hoops, has
neat and novel act. The motion
picture is of the educational type en-
titled 1.-THE Miners Daughter" Next
week, January, g will be presented
"The Two Orphans" by Mr.. Rob-
insons Stock company.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30

Los Angeles. Calf. Dec. 30.-Ar-
rested for praying i'm n public park at
Riverside that he might again see the
face OF the sweetheart for love of
whom he was banishcd from Spain,
Juan Garcia, Spanish nobleman and
former captain of the bodyguard of
the late King Alfonso XII began a
thirty-day sentence for vagrancy.
He declined to give the name OF his
sweetheart, who he believes is now
mother superior of FRANCISCAN con-
vent somewhere on the Pacific coast
Garcia declares that nearly thirty
years ago when he was captain In
the kings bodyguard he planned to
elope with his sweetheart. The king
became angry on learning of his plans
and threw him into prison. Eighteen
years later he was released under am
oath that he would serve in the Span
ish army during the Spanish Amcri-
can war. He went to Cuba and re-
mained until the war ended and then
began a search for his boyhood sweet
heart.
Garcia says he travelled on foot
through most of Mexico and much of
the southern coast country but fall
ed to locate the woman. He says he
has no intention of asking the woman
to marry him, but merely wishes to
see her face again.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30
Every Minute Counts.

A business man from small south
ern town was visiting New York. y
friend asked him what was the mosl
impressive thing he had seen so far
the high buildings. the subway, the
ocean liners or what.
"None of them" was the prompt re
ply. '1he thing that impressed mt
most was the rush In everything.
was In an office one day, and young
woman, evidently new hand, was
opening the mail. There must have
been several hundred letters. She cut
one open, took out the letter and laid
it in its proper basket.
Here. that will never do" said the
boss. Every time you lay down that
paper cutter and take 1t up again you
are wasting time. Cut them all open
first and then take them out, You will
save at least ten minutes that way
every day."-New York Sun.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30

Charles Lamb of LaRue, Mr. and
Mrs. Mac Cookston and son Donald
Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Spraguc and
daughters Donnafern and Delight,
Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Hatfield and son
Berton, Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Mears and
children, Ruth, Lois George and Imo-
gene Mrs. Georgia Metz and son Has
kell and Miss Jane Hatfield.
Mrs. Earl Schertzer who has been
telephone operator for almost four
years resigned her position Saturday
night. Miss Jane Hatfield will fill the
vacancy.
Mr.. and Mrs. John Clements north
west of town were the guests of
their son Raj Clements and family
Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs Fred Schertzer and
daughter Opal of Mt. Victory We're
guests of Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Schertzer
from Friday until Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. June Sprague enter
tained their children at Christmas
dinner Sunday. The home was pret-
tily decorated with Christmas trim
mings of holly and bells and festoons
of crepe paper. The afternoon and
evening was spent with music and
games.
Those present were Mr.. and Mrs.
A. n. Tonguett and son Donald of
Marion. Mr.. and Mrs. Charles
Sprague and daughters Donnaferne
and Delight and Mss Cecil Sprague.
Mr.. and Mrs. II. Il, Wiley and
daughters Frances and Marie Davis
were the Sunday "uests of Mr.. and
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30

home of Mr.. and Mrs. Jacob Kern
of near Moral Sunday.
Gayle Hatfield was the Sunday
guest at the Charles McElvy home.
Mrs. 4. ~ Tonguett and son Donald
Albert of Marion are visiting her par
cnts Mr.. and Mrs. June Sprague a
few weeks.
Miss Grace Titus VINO is attending
college at Ada is home to spend the
holiday vacation with her parents,
Mr.. and Mrs. e. b. Titus north
west of town.
Mr. and Mrs. Verd Kennel and
daughter Genoa of Marion visited
from Saturday until Monday with
Mr.. and Mrs. Grover Melvin of near
DeClff.
Carrie Mears was the guest of her
grandmother, Mrs. Nancy Day south
of the village Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Harry Fields and
Mr.. Eliza Carnes Of Hillsdale, Mich.
are spending the holidays with their
parents Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Carnes
north of town.
The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1910-12-30

Washington, Dec, 3O.--society at
the capital is wrought up over the
disappearance of beautiful young
Mrs. Philip Hichborn, who is said
I have taken passage on the steam
ship Manuretania on its recent record
voyage back to England Horace
Wylie. a Washington clubman, is re-
ported9to have taken passage on the
same ship. Mr.. Wylie is married,
Mrs. Hichborn was Miss Constance
Hoyt and is a daughter of the late
Henry M. Hoyt, solicitor for the state
department. Her husband is a son of
Rear Admiral Hlchborn of the navy.
diplomatic, army and navy circles
are busily discussing the rumors con-
cerning the two. Both the Hich-
born and the Wylie families deny the
alleged elopement, saying there is not
a word of truth in the story. The
Hichborns says that Mrs. Hichborn
has gone TO Atlantic City, being in
III health. and that she is in hospi-
~ there. ''It Is simply club and din
AZ, gossip," say, the relatives Of Mrs.