davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Members of the staff Of the Grand
Rapids Herald, owned by Senator VIII
lam Alden Smith, of Michigan, regard
the Senator as an ideal man to work
for lie is one Of the comparatively Few
newspaper proprietors in the country VINO
are practical newspaper men; ana the
staff respect him accordingly. Even MS
newsboys feel that they have something
in common with the proprietor. inasmueh
as he was once a purveyor OF papers
on the streets himself.
One night Senator Smith wrote an
editorial at home and sent it over TO his
Office by messenger. A few minutes
later he called up the Office by tele-
phone,
4 wish you would read over that edi-
to,ial carefully" he said, ito catch any
slips OF speech, and TO cut II down II
you think il runs a little too long. DO
anything you've a mind 70 with u
Change II around or cut it down one
half If you wish. But there IS just one
thing about 1t that I don't want tamper-
ed with. Those three exclamation points
after the closing sentence IN the second
paragraph from the last must stand Just
as they are-all three of EN-. mind you,
even If ali the rest of the editorial goes
on the fioor!''
Champ Clark. who feels reasonably
certain Of getting the Speakers JOB by
and by. looks this year more Ike a
| iourneyman parson of the old school
than ever. except for new neektie- II
/ is a red necktie about three shades
brighter than the tights worn by John
Griffith in Faust out on the Kerosene
circuit He has also been going around
wearing a carnati0n IN the buttonhole
Of his blue suit When It is recalled that
Uncle joe Is a great hand 10 wear
carnation in his lapel. one wonders II
! Champ Clark chances to have a bit OF
! old fashioned Southern superstition IN
his system. Can 1t be that he Is OF the
sort that think it's bad luck to walk
under a ladder, and who believes what
the weather man says will come true?
Now that the Missourian does seem
sure to be the next Speaker, his friends
are digging up all sorts of things about
him showing that he was a DO
| speakuh." For instance. II is recalled
that he was presiding officer of the de-
batting societies both al Kentucky Uni
verslty and Bethany College. It Is said
too. that he invariably stood az the head
of his classes all through school and cot
lege.
Champ Clark himself is frank 10 say
that the hope OF being Speaker some
day has been the chief factor IN keepine
him in the House all these years. rs
had a good notion some time ago. he
says. to run for Senator. but RETAINED
! because he thought he saw ahead MS
| present chances for the Speakership
which place he prefers TO any other il
public life. unless Il would be the Presi
dency.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
HUMAN NATURE IN WASHINGTON
By FRED C. KELLY.

One of the crowds OF visitors being
shown through the White House the
other day was a tai. houghtful-iooking
man. with prominent Adams apple
and toothbrush in his upper left-hand
vest pocket He said he was from Indi-
ana, and apparently he hailed from one
OF those towns where anybody who is up
after the $50 train has passed through
in the evening is frowningiy regarded as
night owl.
The guide had just pointed out the
$1,000 grand piano in the East Room
ard made the customary remark that
after each time the piano is used piano
tuner comes around with his little doc
tors case full OF tuning utensils and
tunes it. even If it is used every day.
! The Indiana visitor pricked up his ears.
The Tafts don't keep a dog do they?''
/ he inquired. irrelevantly. "No7 / knew
| the Roosevelts did, but l wouldn't think
il would be practical with all that piano
tunin' goin' on. Why we used TO have
! a little brown rat terrier dog, and the
time we had our pianny tuned you'd
! just orter heard the yawpin that dog
| set up. Twas fearful. Seems like most
/ dogs is the same way. They won't
stand for any monotonous harpin' on one
key. the way a piano tuner does I sh'd
/ think thisd be q bad neighborhood foI
dogs, with EN- tunin that thing every
day or So"
Speaking OF the election surprises last
Notwithstanding that people are still
speaking about them-a Kentucky Con
gresham was telling here a few days
ago Of a surprise in Louisville some
fifteen years ago.
At that time 10 be nominated on tht
Democratic ticket in the county wher,
| Louisville is located was equivalent q
being elected. When the Republican,
were making up their ticket that year
they went through the fOTmality OF hav
ing a ticket. OF ceurse-one Of the com
mittee who made up the slate conceived
the idea Of perpetraung a little joke Oh
a young friend OF his by putting in al
name for the office OF county prosecutor
The young man had been admitted q
the bar. but had not succeeded in get
ting any legal work 10 do. according q
the Congressman's story. and gave al
the law business as a bad job.
Along came the Republican laudslid
and the young Republican joke victim
was elected.
II was about a month before the mem
bers OF his party could ascertain hi
whereabouts. for he had left town no
even knowing that he was a candidat
for Office. At last they found him II
was down in Texas. or somewhere Il
the Southwest, posting bills for a cir
Gus,
lie came back, took ONCE. hired a.
experienced lawyer for his assistant
and got along first rate. His assistant
was Bob" Woods. present postmaste
Of Louisville.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
GOD BLESS US EVERY ONE.

God bless every one" prayed Tiny Tim.
Crippled, and dwarfed of body, yet so tall
OF soul, tptoe earth to look on him.
High towering all
He loved the Ioveless world. dreamed. indeed
That it, at best, could give to him. the while,
But plying glances, when his only need
Was but CHEEKY smile.
And thus he prayed God bless every one"
Enfoding all the creeds within the span
OF his child heart and so. despiaing none.
Was saint than
] like to fancy God. in Paradise.
Lifting a finger Der the rhythmic swing
OF Ginning harp and song, with eager eyes
Turned earthward. listening
The Anthem stilled-the angels leaning there
Above the golden walls-the morning
OF Christmas bursting hower-like with the prayer
God bless every one."
JAMES WEITCoMB r
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
vital Issue in Chicago.

Fron the New York Evening Telegram.
Notice by the Chicago Tribune that the
800 composing the socially elect of the
Windy City are breathing heavily over
the solemn question. should oVershoes
be worn at operaF'
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
Why Moses was Great.

From the Lafayette Courier.
A Louisiana doctor says the law OF
Moses covers the health requirements oil
the present day. Doubtless. one thing
certain, Moses would have been against
SO many appendicitis operations.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
Christmas Charity

See me just before Christmas about
it,"
But he who gives quickly. gives
twice"
That's Just il. I don't care to be held
up later for a second subscription"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

In spite OF all they are saying against
Senator Lodge. we know there must be a
lot of good in a man who IS careful
never to split an infinitive.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

A Boston woman is going TO take her
friends up in her own aero. We surrpise
that some of them will prefer not to rise
so high il her estimation.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
A Week Win Each.

Il don't like TO be always moving
about" declared the cook.
Don't, eh?" said the new janitor.
i've been in this apartment house a
year. There's ninety families in it; I'm
good for a year more"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

The President. in showing how the gov
eminent may be saved $5sOoe.ooo year.
has put himself into the Louis Brandeis
class.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

The statue OF Liberty on Bedloe's
Island is TO display much brighter light
than heretofore; and this, also. will prob
ably be accredited to the Democrats.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
He Explains.

Before we were married you bought
me much handsomer presents"
MY general expenses were lighter
then. You lived on your father. and
lived on free lunch"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

clip the wings of its successor by aooi-
ishing the ranking privilege toward the
end of the session.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

The mayor OF Milwaukee wants TO see
'salome" before he condemns 1t and pro-
hibits its performance. There's selfish
ness for youl
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
Point Well Taken.

Firm tn san Fiaueisco chFonic'e.
OF course water. If pure, Is wholesome.
Bu; that is no reason 10 permit milk
dealers TO put IL in milk. II can be got
more cheaply from the kitchen faucet.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

One way not to economic is 10 con
slider the expenditure Of Sl4.000.o00 for
the fertilization of the Panama Canal.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

And yet it is minated that the Presi-
dents message did not contain every
thing he thought OF
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Milwaukee. under its Socialist mayor,
is to give municipal hops. 1t may be re-
called that it was hops that made NIL
Yankee famous
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

The schools are complaining that let
ter-writing IS lost art But the
divorce courts do not bear out this com
plaint
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

A Louisiana court has decided that a
widows kiss is worth $500. on the prin-
ciple that practice makes perfect?
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

A French physician claims as new
discovery the curing of drunkards by
water. In this country the water-wagon
cure has long been in occasional use.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

More eounteffeiters have been arrested
It is becoming more and more difficult
for the plain citizen TO make money.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

II we get universal penny postage. IL
viii be harder than ever 10 spot those
patent medicine circulars in the mails.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

President Diaz must find the delivery
Of inauguration addresses somewhat mo-
notonous.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
No End 10 n.

Some bought gifts early, they avow,
But still they stew.
They hustle out and daily now
Exchange a few.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Sixteen pugflists have been killed in
fights this year. If this average keeps
up. the reform of the prize ring may
come from the inside.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
A string OF Names.

1T must be troublesome to name these
royal babies"
Easiest thing in the world. No sug-
gestion need be rejected"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

And the fact that the children need a
lot OF sweets about tais time OF the year
ought to help make Christmas a merry
time for the sugar trust.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

When the women get hobble skirts
which viii not hobble and hat pins
which will not stick, their reformation
will be nearly complete.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Judge Dill. the father of trusts" is
dead, bat he left a numerous and vigor-
Gus DrngenV
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

It is just as important to shop right as
it is to shop early; in both ambitions
you can be greatly aided by The Wash
ington Herald's advertising columns.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

The Democratic members of Congress
seem to. be divided in opinion as 10
whether Champ Clark should be Speaker
or the presiding officer of a debating
society.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
Noticed Any:

'T notice one harbinger of the new
year"
What's that?"
The 1911 models in automobile jokes
are out"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

If, as some believe. the Panama revo-
luton. which made possible the canal,
had it's origin in Washington, should not
the canal celebration be here also?
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Remember the date-December Is. That
is the day that Col. Roosevelt breaks
back onto tie front page again.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

A hand-organ man of St Paul, MINI.
left an estate Of $4,000. Thus may a
nuisance become a source of wealth.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
A LITTLE NONSENSE.


Oh. Burbank. for thy aid we yean:
our need is sore.
Just do for US this kindly turn
We ask no more.
Put on a hundred men or so
To work in shifts
At training Christmas trees TO grow
Their little gifts.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Tt would be a fine revenge and good for
the people if the present Congress should
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

Somehow we never doubt a man when
ne admits that he is a liar.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

What the people want TO see is wire
less political campaign.
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09
a Wonderful Woman.

Thrifty. is she?"
Thrifty? I won't 20 into a long dis
course. / merely tell you that she banks
money in December"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

When he was eommander-in-chief IN
India he was on several occasions known
to order a parade on the day which had
been set apart for a polo match or a ten
mis- tea, and the ladies could not make
him understand that their parties were
more important than the British army.
Now. wasn't that dense % And he
might be as dense as that if at the head
Of ting war Office. and the fellows who
had been looking forward ali the week 10
billiard match or a bridge drive
would have their fun spoiled. BY way
of getting Kitchener out OF London again
he was offered the post of eomander-ln-
chief in the Mediterranean, where he
! would have had TO spend his time steam
I ing up and down the bright blue sea and
giving a CHEEKY wave Of his hand TO any
/ British territory he might pass lie de-
clined.
I should rather have relished to hear
! the remarks he made to himself declining
I the honor But. all joking aside, l hear
! that Kitchener is going East again. |
/ know he will accept Why? Simply be-
cause ne won't have to answer fifteen
! times each day impairment questions as
to why he does not get married
FLANEUR.
! Copyright. 1870 b. Mcclure Newspaper ssndicate.l
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

There are more automobiles IN the
British Isles than there are IN Germany
France, or any other continental coun-
| try" said Richard Pease, of London, at
! the Raleigh last night And yet ume
was and that but little while ago. when
/ the automobilist was looked upon II Eng
/ land as the very devil in disguise as he
went .hogging it, as it was termed all
| over the country, and the law was very
! severe on him.
..Driving at excessive speed TO the pub
lie danger as it is termed il the police
court charge sheet, is an onense "hlch
/ is growing less and less, thanks 70 the
efforts Of the Royal Automobile CLUB ana
tho Automobile Association. But when
an offender in this respect is caught IN
nolice trap il is not the duty or the
/ policeman on duty 20 arrest the
chauffeur. He does not always even take
the trouble to stop the car, being con-
tented with simply registering the num-
her in his notebook for future use.
compared with American methods Tor
dealing with such cases. and as an IN
stance Of the easy going ways OF the
country police In England MEMBER OF
tha Automobile Club tells a good story.
He was touring in Cumberland some
n,onths ago. when he was stopped for
exceeding the speed limit. Time went on.
and as he heard no more about II, he
,bo,,ght the matter had been dropped.
hut the other day he got friendly let
ter from the local police superintendent
which said that this official had received
a complaint against the automobiist Tor
/ ofending against the motor car act OF
fars bv driving a ear at an excessive
speed on September 80 last. The police
Official added that there was no great
danger caused by this fast driving. and
that he was not 10 be summoned for
The alleged offense. but advised the mo-
torist that when ne came into his county
with his car the next time 10 comply
with the law"
The Washington herald., 1910-12-09

lsilibS the irdNkiHb piiNitN6S sO"eA'U 80
end Of the session.
The President, in showing how the gov
eminent may be saved $5s,Ooo,Ooo a year,
has put himself into the Louis Brandeis
class.
And yet it is intimated that the Presi-
dents message did not contain every
thing he thought Of.
A Boston woman is going to take her
friends up in her own aero. We surrrise
that some of them will prefer not to rise
so high il her estimation.
A Louisiana court has decided that a
widows kiss is worth $500. on the prin-
eiple that practice makes perfect?
More eounteFfeiters have been arrested
It is becoming more and more difficult
for the plain citizen to make money.
Judge Din. THE father of trusts" is
dead. but he left a numerous and vigor-
Gus progeny.
The Democratic members of Congress
seem to. be divided in opinion as 10
whether Champ Clark should be Speaker
or the presiding officer of a debating
society.
What the people want TO see is wire
less political campaign.
If. as some believe. the Panama revo-
luton. which made possible the canal,
had it's origin in Washington, should not
the canal celebration be here also?
Somehow we never doubt man when
ne admits that he is a liar.
A hand-organ man of St Paul. MINI,
left an estate OF SSO.OOO Thus may a
nuisance become a source of wealth
A French physician claims as new
| discovery the curing of drunkards by
water In this country the water-wagon
cure has long been in occasional use.
The mayor of Milwaukee wants to SEE
''Salome" before he condemns 1t and pro-
hibits it's performance. There's selfish
ness for you!
Milwaukee. under its Socialist mayor,
is to give municipal hops. 1t may be re-
called that it was hops that made NIL
waukee famous.
When the women get hobble skirt:
which will not hobble and hat pin;
which will not stick, their reformation
will be nearly complete.
And the fact that the children need q
lot OF sweets about this time of the yea
ought to help make Christmas merry
/ time for the sugar trust.
/ 1t is just as important TO shop right as
| it is to shop carly; in both ambitions
You can be greatly aided by The Wash
ington Herald's advertising columns.
Sixteen pugilists have been killed II
fights this year. II this average keep
up. the reform OF the prize ring ma!
come from the inside.
The schools are complaining that let
ter-writing Is a lost art But tn
divorce courts do not bear out this com
plant
One way not to economic is 20 con
slider the expenditure of H4.o0.OOO 70
the fertilization of the Panama Canal.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
For SALE.

FOR SALE
A business corner recently sold for
$4,000. rents for 1925 per month, but
the unforeseen happened. party has to
leave town and will take $500 Tor a
quick sale. See US.
4 BIG BARGAIN.
An room story house and store
building IL lots, on corner, only
$500. Have many other bargains In
business property. residence and va
cant lots.
81 acres improved farm. good house.
close to FL Paso. $500 per acre
&C acre farm, all in cultivation, al
falfa, grape vines, fruit, etc. with good
house, 1925 per acre.
SO acres improved farm, close to the
city, all in alfalfa, wheat. truck. etc;
fine house and outhouses. stock. imple-
ments and tools. complete pumping
plant. Everything included at $500 per
acre; easy terms.
Have listed for sale a number of
small and large tracts OF valley land
under ditch from S25 per acre and up.
See us.
Have some excellent propositions for
colonization purposes, the land lies in
the Rio Grande valley and under ditch.
10000 acres at $3.50 per acre
1000 acres at $25 per acre.
$500 acres at $3.50 per acre.
$500 acres at S35 per acre
For further particulars see.
WM. MOELLER.
Real Estate, Loans, Rentals and
Insurance.
Herald Building. Sell 1927; kuto. 1855.
FL PaSO. Texas
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Bids Wanted

SEALED PROPOSALS
VIII be received at the office of c. w.
Fassett, City Clerk of the City of Ell
Paso. Texas, at City hall. until 10 a NJ
September goth. 1910, for a complete
garbage, refuse and sewage disposal
plant for the City of Ell Paso, in ac-
cordance with plans and specifica tons
which may be secured upon an aDpli
cation therefor to either the City En-
gineer or the consulting engineers, ac-
companied by $50, which will be re-
turned on receipt of a bid in proper
FORM
The capacity of the refuse destruc
tors will be three tons per hour and
of the sewage plant three millions Of
gallons daily.
A certified check equal to 10 percent
Of bid must accompany each proposal.
City Council reserves the right to
reject any and all bids.
Public Works Engineering Company
Consulting Engineers, Beck Bldg.
Portland. Oregon
c. W. FasSett. City Clerk
FL PaSO. Texas
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Wanted Situations.

WANTED-Work by young man in
store, office or outside. Address B. A.
Herald.
WANTED-By practical and expert
enced bookkeeper, 10 years experience
with large corporations, age 49, At
present employed; highest credentials
for integrity and ability. Address
Hustler care of Herald.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
For Sale-Real Estate.

FOR SALE.
so acres near the FL Paso dairy farm
about miles below FL Paso. This land
has been under cultivation within the
past years. A fine chance to resell
in tracts of l to acres each at a good
advance. Price S175 per acre; terms Is
cash, balance 1 and years at per-
cent.
Five lots on Boulevard corner. in
Bassett's addition; blocks north OF
Southwestern shops. Price $500 per
lot; terms.
Close in on Epson Ave. we have de-
sirable building site, S7hx120 feet.
Price $500.
$4,000 will buy on Mesa Ave, near
Boulevard. 3 room brick cottage.
Compare this price with ether prop
critics offered for sale on this street.
and you will find this to be the besr
bargain offered
FOR RENT.
709 Brown ST., 3 rooms $500
SIZE Overland. rooms. $500
zOl w. Rio Grande. 6 room. $500
BEHR & WATTS,
WE WRITE FIRE INSURANCE,
MONEY TO LOAN.
CITY NATL. BANK BLDG,
ia Pioneer Plaza.
Phone 4A4
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Directory Of OsteopathY.

DIR. A. t. STILL, OstcOT atbIc Ipfrmary,
from Kirksville. No. founder OF Osteo-
patty, President American School OF
OsteOpathy. DR.. Ira ". Collins. Physi-
cian-in-Chief. President National Ostea-
pathic Association. Only recognized
osteopaths now in Ell Paso-others were
compelled to take out medical license.
POI w. Missouri ST. TelephoEe 1906.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Wanted-Real Estate.

~---~~~--">----~->-~~>~~~~~
WANTED TO BUY-One and one-half
or two lots in a good residence neigh
borhOod; must not be too far out from
business center. May be with 4 or
room house. State location and price.
Address P. O. box 226 Ell Paso, Tex
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
FOR SALE.

800 acres of fine prairie hay, decided
land. II miles east from Deming;
shipping point PA miles; near post
office and school; well improved, with
large earth reservoir stocked with
fish: title good, cheap.
Also improved 40 acres, four miles
northeast Of Deming, in the heart OF
the shallow water belt; good home,
title perfect; cheap
THOS. G.. AITKEN,
DSming N NJ
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Lost and Found.

L0ST-White bull terrier, brown spot
on back, months old. Answers TO
name Pat" License tag 343. Phone
Bell 799 or 474
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
Rooms. Board. Etc.

FOR RENT nicely furnished room
in private home with sleeping porch,
high cool part Of the city. close in. 333
". Missouri ST. Phone 1926.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1910-08-25
LOWER VALLEY BARGAIN.

757 acres of very fine land. 420
acres in the valley. rest level table
land. Over 100 acres cleared. One
mile of town, five miles from the
nlacadam road. This is the best buy in
the valley $3.50 per acre, 1-3 cash,
balance l. . and years.
PETERMAN-L4ANSDE REALTY CO.,
2266-4 rings black. Ysleta. Tex.