The St. Mary banner. (Franklin, Parish of St. Mary, La.) 1889-1931, 1910-04-30
SHEAR
NONSENSE.

Miss Print want a husband whit
will be easily pleased" Miss Crouch
That's the kind you'll get."-Life.
GLADYS, you are spelling YOU
dolly No, mamma; / am painting
its cheeks with the same color thai
you use. Judge.
They say she will create no enc
OF gossip We'll. guess the jobbers
in that community viii be able &c
handle her output. ''-Louisville Cour-
Ter Journal.
There's masked man at the back
door?" Horrors. Is he after my dia-
mo1ds?' No, maCame. He only
wants 20 borrow can of gasOlene. -
Louisville Courier Journal.
/ Artist Ito burglar, who is making
away with ngs)-"Er-by the
way if you should manage to dispose
Of them, would you mind sending me
your customers address?"-Life.
There's one thing we will have to
change if these ladies who wish to
vote have their way" said Senator
Sorghum. What is that" We'll
have to quit talking about the wis
dom of the plain people. "-Washing-
ton Star.
Mrs. Mulligan-"Och. Oh niver go
to tn shore but plat Oh fergti sum-
him. Mr.. Mulligan-"An' phwat did
yez fergit this tonne. darlin'?" Mrs.
Mulligan-"It's afther fergittin to go
at all, at all, Dim doing this marn-
n."-Judge.
You should bear in mind said the
publisher, that four-fifths of the peo-
pie who read novels are women"
That's why l call my new story
The Last Word,'" replied the novel
list; every woman will want it,
Philadelphia Record.
Yes, the Indian was a weak rene
.gade. 1--WE call him Statistics!"
sneered the chief of the tribe And
why Statistics?" Because" (here the
old savage spat upon the ground dis
dainfully), you can torture almost
anything out of him. Puck.
Pa" boo-hooed the chastised son,
"if had let Willie Simmonds lick
me. instead of me licking him, would
you've whipped me just the same?"
Yes but remember that in such
a case you would be getting TWO lick
ings in place of one!"-Judge.
What are the three known dimen-
I'D hn nj hn
night school. THE world, the flesh,
and the DEVIL gasped the shaggy
haired pupil. taken by surprise and
unable at the moment to get his |
mental bearings.-Chicago Tribune.
Il acknowledge. your honor said
the prisoner, that l punched this |
man in moment of indignation" Il |
have minded the moment OF |
Indignation so much" put in the
had he not also punched |
me in the face. Baltimore Ameri-
ran.
Stranger lin Drearyhurst)-"You
people here don't clean the snow off
Tour sidewalks very well, do you?"
Uncle Welby Gosh-"No, sir 1t saves
he sidewalks an we b'lieve in con-
'ervin' our resources. See anything
Use you don't like, er?"-Chica-
20 Tribune.
British campaign sidelights.-First
Charlie, 'opes the
leyt guv-ment'll make things look up
bit" Second loafer-"They would il
was among 'em. But it's 'uman ma
ur, you may depend-as soon as
hey gifts inter Parlment they forgets
hey was once men, like me and you
and they does nufink. Punch.
Just this way, SIR" said the cour-
eous clerk in the railroad ticket
flee. Let me show you some sum-
Ter guides entitled Where to Co
nd When to Co. The man with the
lodest income shook his head. They
ont interest me-" he sighed. What
want to know is How to Co..
hicago Daily News.
"John-John,' whispered Mrs.
idgeley, nudging her husband.
What is it?" he sleepily asked.
There's a burglar in the house"
What do you want me to do-get I'D
I'D run the risk of being killed."
No; but if you find in the morning
lat somebody has gone through your
ockets, don't blame e."-Chicago