davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
BRIDGE HINTS
in June Smart Set.

D. B. VanBuren in June Smart Set
With the years against you, never
venture a weak heart declaration unless
you have diamonds enough to pull you
through.
Holding a commanding club. don't hesi-
tate to tell the cook 1t looks like rain, If
the soup justifies the declaration.
If you hold good heart, don't dis
card it.
Never waste time attempting to finesse
when your wife is obviously leading up
to new broadcloth suit
If you find an unguarded knave, kick
him and run.
If you are short OF honors, never
Fmind-many an obscure man dies rich.
With three good suits and four dia-
monds, 1t is safe to accept an invitation
to weekend party.
If your partner is a dummy, don't
complain; she probably wouldn't have
married you If she hadn't been.
With the score against you, Zip the
waiter literally.
Do not make practice of leading
through the cafe door.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

A FINE OLD SEA DOG

From the Washington Post.
The welcome tidings is that there is to
be a revival of the delightful novels of
Frederick Marryat, who was post cap
tain of the British navy in the old days
of the sail craft, and whose romances of
the sea are as far superior to all other
like tales as our own Cooper's Indian
stories surpass the works of Emerson
Bennett, who was no SLOUGH at that sort
Of narrative by any means himself
The man of threescore who at 10 years
of age reveled In Robinson Crusoe"
cannot bear to read that glorious novel
now; but the man past threescore who
read Peter Simple" Jacob Faithful"
1.-The Kings own Frank Midway"
1.-THE Dog Fiend' Newton Forster"
1.-THE Pasha of Many Tales" "Percival
Keen" "Ratlin the Refer" and the rest
of them will renew his youth to go back
and read these delicious old chapters
again
And we will find things that surprise
him; that have lain dormant in his MEM
ory for half a century. He meets an old
friend he had long forgot. but who sud-
denly appears on the scene and grasps
his memory and his imagination in hearty
clasp.
And. what healthy writer this old sea
dog was! How he did hate meanness
and how he did punish 1t! How he did
love a magnanimity, and how he did re-
ward it!-all except in THE Kings
Own" where there was something like
an osession of justice, and merit died
| with wickedness.
Let the French take the realistic schoo
and be hanged to them. Let us Anglo
Saxons cling to the romantic. that re-
wards the virtuous and Furnishes the
reprobate. AS grand old Sir Walter Scot
said. If one is to be professional liar In
harmless way, let him conceive a story
that has pleasant denouement.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
Alfred Noyes, 1.-The Enchanted Island and
D<,asa Nc

Alfred Moves, 1.-The Enchanted Island and
other POEMS"
(Morning) : -
Idle, comfortless, bare, .
The broad. bleak acres lie;
The ploughman guides the sharp plough-
share at
Steadily nigh. ~
The big plough horses lift
AND climb from the marge Of the sea.
AND. the clouds of their breath on the
clear wind drift
over the fallow lea.
Streaming up with the yoke. \ So
Brown as the ,sweet-smelling loan,
Tbro' sun-swept smother Of sweat and
smoke
The two great horses come.
Cp thro' the raw, cold morn * sAp
They: trample and drag and swing;
And my dreams are waving with un-
grown corn
In far-off spring. 1
L. Is my soul lies bare 4
Between the hills and the sea-
Gene, plouEhman Life. with thys aha.
plough-share, II =
And plough the field for me.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
CALLED BACK.


lie turned from a world of trouble
And The press of toiling throns,
Where fame, blown abroad, is a bubble
And right is subdued by the wrong,
To 9 vale where a road was winding
BY the shores of shadowy stream
And the arms of the trees were binding
The rills in sylvan dream.
Their the burden slipped from his shout
ders
And the care was raised from his heart,
And he grew a comrade of boulders
And hills and moved apart
From the sordid walks of schemers
And the slaves who MOL for gain,
And was one with the race of dreamers
And his soul heard a sweet refrain
That was blown from the fields of child
hood
And the lanes of long ago,
When his feet roamed free in the Wild
wood.
And the fires of his heart were aglow.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
Great Expeditions

1.-THE people in this section of the
country are naturally interested in the
contest between New Orleans and San
Francisco over the Panama exposition, +"
said a business man. New Orleans is the
proper place for it, and / hope Congress
will so view the question
1.-The Ohio Valley exposition, to be held
at Cincinnati early in the coming fall, is
attracting the attention of the south and
it should appeal especially to Alabama.
II opens in August and will continue sew
eral weeks. Birmingham should be well
represented there.
New York is getting up great
worlds fair for 1913, in commemoration
haitian Island in 1913 1t will draw great
crowds, for after ALL New York is the
one city that Americans from every Sec
ton delight to visit. New York, owing
to it's great size and its cosmopolitan pop
ulation, is lacking in public spirit. New
Workers themselves joke about not having
local pride or public spirit. But in order
to promote a New York worlds fair,
prominent citizens are at last bestirine
terest Henry Clews in an address at a
worlds fair banquet last week at the
Hotel Aston. said. among other things:
europeans generally know less
about New York than the people OF
this country know of foreign cities
Comparatively few across the ocean
realize that our harbor Is the prin-
cipal gateway to the land where over
81 900 900 of people live. Thousands WIFI
have never been in America will visit
us if we make the fair worthy OF
| the Empire City. Our tourists take
millions of our money over the seas
every summer and spend it on theil
Old World travels. This celebration OF
1913 would certainly bring thousand.
of foreign tourists and millions Of for.
| eign money, to US, and We should
not fail to impress them with the ides
that it will compensate them to visit
us at that time and become acquaint
ed with our country from ocean tt
ocean.
"As the late President Mckinley said
| 'Expositions are the timex eepers o.
progress and in my belief there can
not be too many of them, as the,
serve to demonstrate the progress
made in science. arts, education ant
industry.
But the New York international ex
position will have a greater object. II
view than the other expeditions, to
wit: The development of foreign trade
which. according to statistics, could b'
materially increased.
i "Expositions serve also other pur
poses. They stimulate the citizens t.
embellish their city BY opening beau
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

be put beyond commercial handling or
gambling.
Just what July and August and Sep
TENDER will do TO outstanding contracts
remains to be seen, but the belief
is that the bears are vanquished and
that they will not he able to draw
to New York any great amount OF
cotton. The hope is that the bulls
will be able to hold their own, thus
enabling them to teach the Wall street.
ers lesson they will not soon for
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
MAKING A HIT
From the Circle Magazine.

From the Circle Magazine.
At a small stag dinner the only
young and entirely unnoteworthy per-
son present sat throughout the meal
communing with his own bashful soul,
afraid lest by speaking he betray his
sophistication. Dessert being served,
he. felt he must have some of the can
died fruit at the other end of the,
table. Clearing his voice. he fixed the
nearest waiter with glittering eye,
and, amid sudden total silence, per-
emptorily called out at the top Of his
voice, Pigs, fieas." A 81 atsl
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
IN HOTEL LOBBIES.
MIR. Mays Observations

Isaac May of Richmond Va, who
| travels for large eastern shoe house, Is
registered at the Morris. He Is one OF
the best known and most popular men
ION the road and as he has been get
ting over. the -sourh twice a year for the
past 10 years he is exceptionally well
informed on southern conditions.
Business has been good this spring"
said Mr.. May 1.-THE south is wonderfully
prosperous and reviewing this section
since 1900 its material development has
been very marked. Birmingham seems
to be going ahead by leaps and bounds
improvements since | was here six
months ago are noticeable. and comparing
the city with what it was a year or two
ago it seems to have improved 100 per
cent or more
Mr.. May said that Alabama got lot
of good free advertising out of the land
slide defeat of the prohibition amend
nent last fall. alabama was TEMPORARY
ly hurt by its statewide -cohieition leg
islation," SAID Mr.. May, land if the
amenders had won at the polls every city
in the state would have been seriously
rare advantages and it's pulsating energy,
would have got backset. because in the
mind of investors and homeseekers moth
ing is so calculated to hinder develop
mett as drastic sumptuary laws. But the
fact that constitutional prohibition was
rejected by the people had a splendid eff
fest not only on Alabama, but it haG a
far-reaching influence for good in other
states where statutory prohibition was
being agtated
Local option is the right system
and 1 am not surprised to learn tina
the democratic state convention at
Montgomery Is overwhelmingly in ia
vor of restoring Alabama to its local
option position of a few years ago.
Reformers may discuss the liquor ques-
ton till doomsday but I doubt if any
thing better for real temperance in
large cities can be devised than high
license and strict regulation.
MY home, Richmond, is a model city
in respect to saloons. There are fewer
of them than in former days. We never
had many dives but now we have none.
The people who drink do so in mod
Grafton, and tipsy man is rare in
deed. The Virginia legislature last
winter acted wisely and in accordance
with public sentiment in rejecting the
Anti-S Saloon leagues measure for
referendum on state wide prohibition.
1.-The prohibition wave has certainly
spent itself and one reason why the
reaction is so pronounced is because
of the fanatica1 character of those who
believed the falsely named temperance
cause.
1.-The blind tiger is running riot in
all the so-called dry cities. Whisky is
served in teacups and beer in large
coffee cups. For a thirsty man that
style answers; but after all 1t looks
SO absurd to resort to such methods
l feel confident that the next time l
visit Birmingham l can have glass
of beer with my lunch or at the bar of
my hotel in good, honest fashion,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
The Benefit Concert

I'VE have had satisfactory rehearsal
of the ELI oratorio,' said Prof. Fred l..
Grambs, the director, after he had laid
down his baton last night. 1.-The chorus
is in good form and l am certain that
music lovers will be pleased with the per-
Torrance at the Orpheum next Sunday
afternoon. The 70 Birmingham oratorio
chorus, assisted by the orchestra play
crs of the musicians union are giving
ELI for the benefit of the mine dis
asters relief fund.
Mr. A. H. Ford bought 500 tickets this
evening and handed in his check for $3.50,
the price of the tickets being so cents.
Something like 1900 tickets have been
sold and as many more will probably be
Sold
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

tiful new thoroughfares, erecting fine
buildings, and generally making OF the
surroundings of the exposition most
beautiful spot. st. Louis and Chicago
are examples of what an exposition
can do to develop that part of city
where an exposition is held.
Losses. If any, in expositions are
few and are generally caused by mis-
takes which, knowing them, we WONT
repeat; but New York on that score Is
lucky, as by reason of its large pop
ulation it does not fear to lose, be-
cause IL could If necessary sustain It's
exposition and come out winner.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The Russian peasants and the southern
negroes have prepared ascension robes
for use this week against the comet, but
those robes can be cut up into something
useful, and no material loss of dry goods
will result
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
A Great Convention

1.-The state convention presented stir
ring scene" said Ferd Marx, who re-
turned from Montgomery last night. ut
was a very fine body of men and it was
a noteworthy fact that an overwhelming
majority of the delegates were in favor
of local option as against the present
prohibition laws. The convention is said
to have been one of the most represent
tative in Alabama
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Mr.. Roosevelt has gotten everything,
almost, but he is not a knight of the gar
ter, and he has not been admitted to the
order of the bath. He really does not
need either.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

whether this would prove tile pestilential
or the salubrious influence of comets on
human affairs depends altogether upon
the individuals party point of view
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

From The Rochester Democrat and
Chronicle.
THE trouble is" remarks the demo-
cratic Birmingham Age-Herald, Mayor
cavnor could not carry Ohio and Jud-
son Harmon could not carry New YORK.
In addition to that, both combined could
not carry majority of the states OF the
union. ff ~
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Those Illinois democratic legislators
who voted for Billy Lorimer have been
explaining their singular action to grand
juries. They are really seeking immuni-
ty hat he
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Denver Col, May 17.-Partial re-
turns from a. scattered precincts in
dictated tonight that Denver has gone
wet. Eleven downtown precincts
showed a vote OF 2 to ! against the
drys.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

From the New York Press.

From tNe NeW 4 OTk TTtsB. n
You don't have to know very much in
this world If other people know less.
Anyhow, it's better to be a fool hav>
ing some fun than a wise man with
the dyspepsia.
A woman would almost rather have
YOU think she was musical than that
she knew her A, B C's.
Most men act as If they'd rather
drink poison than eat something that's
good for their health.
There's something about reformer
that makes nearly everybody else want
to be . criminal.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

NO PLACE FOR LOW-BROws.
The lola Registers musical critic de-
livers himself of the following remarks
for the benefit of half-baked aesthetics
who see or try to see more in music
than was ever intended to be put there,
like the old inerbriate who once saw
snakes when Blind Tom" was playing
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
sENATOR BANkHEAD.s BEST

From the Washington Herald.
The very best that Senator John Hollis
Bankhead could muster was vote slight
ly in excess OF his combined opposition,
Ell? Evidently, 1t was not exactly Mr..
Bankhead's busy day.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

When some of Mr.. Roosevelt's enemies
heard that the ex-President would not be
counted in the present census they made
haste to be counted themselves.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The senators from the state of Wash
appointment of Ballinger, and the Pres
ident will have to shoulder the whole
of IL
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The sugar trust continues to be loaded
with favors by the government despite its
short weights and criminal record. Moth
ing seems to be too good for it.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

When the Aldrich machine Endorses the
long and-short haul clause inserted by the
Senate in the railroad BILL the public just
naturally concludes it is a water haul.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Andrew Carnegie predicts that Mayor
Gaynor of New York will go higher
This Endorsement will not hurt Gaynor as
long as it is not seconded by Jim Hin.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

King George didn't need the coronation
oath that the diplodocus may have taken,
and he was sworn in sensibly as any
other official is.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
Birmingham Real Estate

1.-THE Birmingham real estate markei ~
rea sonably active, said prominent
realty man.
Residence property is, in the nature OF
things, reaching higher levels. fashioh-
able home sites may seem quite high as
compared with prices four or fVe years
ago. But it must be remembered that the
intrinsic value of everything in Birming-
ham has increased, and will continue 10
increase, with the growth of the city.
There is almost no trading in central
business property. There is little of such
realty offered for sale, and If prices were
quoted they would seem fancy indeeo,
not to say prohibitive. The business as
triot is spreading out, but it is still con-
fined to a comparatively few blocks.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The comet as a weather or any other
kind of influence is fast losing its grip
here on terrestrial things.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Colonel Roosevelts German has, alas,
Kaisers English was all right.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The revolt against Senator Lodge in
Massachusetts is as deep and marked as
is the revolt in New Jersey against Gum
shoe kean.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

A Seattle man cured a stomach trouble
by fasting 80 days. They buried him on
the fortieth day.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Castro is to become hotel proprietor
He always did have an eye on the cash
register.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Before Mr.. Roosevelt can be made Pres
ident of the world several little legal
obstacles will have to be overcome.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

Fritz Augustus Heinze has been ac-
quilted. 1t is the poor and humble that
are convicted in this world.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The Iowa papers are kept from the
President, and he stays in the best of
humor.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

The comet is going to make one-night
stands in the early evening. This is for
the benefit of the hoi polloi.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

A man higher up in Pittsburg has been
located. but the man highest up has not
been.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
WISELY SPOKEN.

WISELY SPOKEN.
Marry me-" said the count, land you
will be the light of my life
1T is not l who would be the light OF
your life., answered the sapient heiress,
although dare say my money would
make quite a confiagration when you
started to burn it,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
POWER OF PADEREWsKI

Manchuria is the Massachusetts, of the
Orient. It's bean crop did it.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

AS soon as Congress really begins to
give us postal savings banks the band
should begin to play.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
MORE POPULAR WAY.

"An Oriental nobleman says to Amer
lean girls, Get husband and see Japan
in the spring."
Most of them will get husband and
clean house in the spring." Z,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
HIS SORT.

what sort of fellow is Pinks?"
He pronounces aeroplane as If 1t were
spelled 'arrowplane.'
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
"LIFE-STORYo CLERKS.

LII SLERho.
IF the woman who called at~my store
Saturday and told the clerk the story Of
her life, including two engagements. seven
proposals, and two husbands, throwing in
all the details about babies whooping
cough and how to make sponge cake,
with the purchase of 10 cents worth Of
buttons, will return to buy the dress to
sew them on, special clerk will be en-
gagged to sell 1t to her. and hear the
rest of her lifes story. We cater to
the trade, and not only keep in stock all
that women of good taste could desire,
but we aim to hire clerks for the special
purpose of hearing life story thrown
in with every scent purchase. Gard Of
Merchant Prince" in the Great Bend
Tribune.
FINS.
The sweetest thought
I've had today
Is simply this:
I'm done. Hooray!'
PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
QUITE A TRAVELLER.

QUITE A TRAVELLER.
Have you ever read Byron's poem
about The Girl of Cadiz'?"
who's Byron?''
"Oh. the poet. Of courser'
mo; I've never read any poem about
the girl of Cadiz, but I've been there It's
one Of the incest towns in Ohio.''
PESKY PALLADINO.
"Eusapia is
Herself again. ~.
Some news we read
Gives us a pain.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

AS BLACK Ely Els GO.
That's a lovely black eye you are
wearing
"Umph, I'm glad you like it."
81 don't like it. l simply think it's
good of its kind
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
NOT so HAIR

NOT so HARD.
Teddy. iJr.. soon will wed,
He's took out his permit.
There, by lingo! we have dug
Out rhyme for Kermit.
Houston Post.
OF course Ted, Jr., II take a bride
He wouldn't be hermit.
Excuse us while we point with pride
To another rhyme for Kermit.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
NOT coon For WIVES.
SHOWING OFF.

do you read Rabelais?"
"Only after my wife has gone to bed
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

49, = "A
The Battle of Manassas" Thus tiny
Registers musical critic:
This is confession, not boost. wy
like music, are pretty good whistler an4
have enjoyed some tunes that were ~
least near classical, but when we read thy
programme of a recent musical event here
we knew we had no business there. Ons
page of the programme informed us whose
'etude' the time was and the next page
explained what it sought to tell. For in@
stance, one piano piece is described thusI
The wonder-child that came to us through
the pink gates of the dawn was rockies
to rhythmic dreams in this cradle song,
muted music. Modulations from piseont
egg blue to Nile green, most misty ana
subtle, dissolve before ones eyes ana
for moment the sky is peppered with
tiny stars in doubles, each independently
tinted Now. we rise here to confess
that we would not know when a tune
'modulated from pigeon-egg blue to Nile
green and anyone in our fix had az
much business at that musical as blind
man at circus"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-05-18

SAYS A CONNOISSEUR.
The sanitary kiss
May or may not be sweet,
But the old-fashioned kind
Is mighty hard to beat.