davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
GETTING EVEN,

GETTING EVEN. The sentlest wight, Who has to walk This for the truth, Not idle talk Perforce must smile When that he sees An autoist
 Down on his knees, Confronted by
 A punctured tire And mad enough
 To bite wire. Or else. beneath
 His bubble cart On s back attempts To fix a part That's jolted loose. Or something broke, This motoring"
 Thinks he mo joke" The gentlest wight, l say again, Who has to walk, Can scarce refrain From laughing out In fulsome glee At Goggle- Eyes PerpleXity!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

place for curbstone humor" And then aloud: IT have been talking for good roads, madam. We have decided to run rock road by here and as"
 "Who has decided?" This in the voice conductor uses when he asks you howl old your little boy is.
 Why stammered, "the Good Roads club, and-''
 q don't belong to 1t, do I? They wouldn't have a woman member, would they?'
 "I'm sure I don't know. have been chiefy-" I
 Sure you don't" the Widow Yarn snapped. You're chiefly concerned about taxing my 40 acres into the county treas ury without letting me vote on 1t. What right have you to come over here to build roads? Are you roadbuilder? Did you ever build a road or pay for oner'
 Madam" I said. you really do have vote on this question if a road district is organized. You have 40 votes-one for every acre you own, and" o
 Her face lighted up with light that never was seen before on human face. un- less, perhaps, in riding on an old trans- fer or getting rid of @ bad nickel. She opened the door wider-I had not been ad- mitted up to that moment-and asked mel to enter.
 You say I have 40 votes?" she in- quired.
 You have" I assured her, feeling like the bearer of good news.
 Well, glory bel" the Widow Yarn sighed, rocking herself comfortably. "Glory be, say I; I'll cast them all againat your old rock road. Now I must be get ting ready for prayer meeting"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
GIVING HIM CREDIT.

GIVING HIM CREDIT. In the press of life, Where the crowds were surgiug, He bore with the strife, Nor wanted urging. When the shadows gloomed Still cheerily toiling, Though his plans seemed doomed, So thick the turmoiling. And when the hard years Had visibly frightened And the leaven of tears By the sunshine was brightened: When honor was gained And all that he sought for, By fortune disdained Still labored and fought for, The friends of his youth Their heads fell to shaking, And spoke as if truth Were theirs for the making. Discounting the pluck He showed from beginning, They nuttered fools luck Was the cause of his winning.
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
A LIGHT LOAD.

"Confound it! You've wrecked my train of thought"
 "Pshawl I dare say there wasn't an ounce Of common sense on board"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
IDEAL FOR JOY RIDING.

Do you suppose there will be any au- i, tomobiles in heaven?" asked the man who owned touring car
 T don't know" said the man who had just come in to order some tires, but there ought to be. Streets paved with gold would make fine speedways." a
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The girl he kissed, a toddler there,
 Is called grandmother now; And where, oh, where's the curly hair That once adorned his brow?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
COMIC OPERA.

A steamship pier, a crowd inferred,
 Will give the right scenario; frotagonists, a spoiled song- bird,
 A raging impresario.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
 We forget past misery so we can get it again.
 The way to keep your friends is to let them use you.
 Women cork up secrets so tight that the bottle always bursts.
 The chief trouble about getting mar ried is all the money you will think you would have had if you hadn't done it.
 A man really can make more fuss over the way a barber trims his mustache than a woman over the way tailor cuts her gown.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The humble horse-drawn vehicle is still retained by few old-fashioned people who do not desire to aggrandize any further John D.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Since the discovery that H. H. Rogers died worth only $S4,OOO0O0, some think John DIS executors will not be able to show up real billion-dollar fortune.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The comet now rises at about a. m.. which is not convenient hour for spec- tators. A baseball game is more reason. able in its hours
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Meet the census man half way if you see him first. Get listed in Uncle Sam's great roll even if you have to go to the government building to do it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

T. R. is not seeing Europe-he is giving Europeans a chance to see the great hunter and the most popular man in the world. They get glimpse of him and away he goes to another capital.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
THEN TAKE FEM OFF

THEN IAhE 'EM UFF.
 stick to your f1annels for a week or so yet, nevertheless" says the Wash ington Herald. Quite right, quite
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
MORE TO ms TASTE,

Since work is so encumbering,
 He met it with a sob; But. when it came to slumbering, Was quickly on the job.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
sf

That in the temples inmost place spirit
 dwelt. Made all the lghti
 For glimpses of it they had caught Beyond the curtains when the priests That served the altar came and went All loved that light and held it dear That had this partial grace; But the adoring priests alone who lived By day and night submerged in It's im-
 mortal glow, Knew all it's power and depth and could
 appraise the loss If it should fade and fail and come no
 more. All this was long ago-so long ago! The light burned on; and they that wor- a
 ship'd it. And they that caught it's flash at inter-
 vals and held it dear, A Contented lived in it's sure possession. An. How long ago 1t was, 4 sf And then when they Were nothing fearing, and Gods peace
 was in the air. And none were prophesying harm The vast disaster fell Where stood the temple when the sun Was vacant desert when 1t rose again. An, yes, Iris ages since it chancedi
 So long ago 1t was, That from the memory of the hamlet-folk
 the Light has passed They scarce believing, now that once 1t
 was, Or if believing, yet not missing it, And reconciled to have it gone. Not so the priestsl Oh, not so The stricken ones that served it day and
 night. Adoring it, abiding in the healing of it's
 peace: They stand yet, where erst they stood Speechiess in that dim morning long ago; And still they gaze, as then they gazed, And murmur, 'It will come again; It knows our pain-it knows-it knows An, surely, 1t will come again. Lake Lucerne, August IS, 1897.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Minister Calhoun has been presented to the prince regent in China, and he is now ready to discuss trade and politics in high places.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

It is every mans duty to see that he is listed in Uncle sams great decennial count. the thirteenth of long series.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The comet may be visible to the naked eye, but the naked eye is not willing to work overtime on frosty mornings.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The people are much inclined to hold the President responsible for everything except what can be 'laid on'' the comet.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
TIME FLIES.

right. By that time they will stick to
 you.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The cold wave has added to the profits of cold storage. It is an ill wind that blows nobody any good
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
HEARD IN GRANVILLE.

Poor Willie Wiggles He came to aD untimely end" 'Suicide?"
 No; germicide."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
ANOTHER SIDE OF "JErE.

MT. James J. Jeffries says he thinks Lorna Doone' the greatest book ever written. Not bad for a prize fighters choice.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Prisoners who cannot write poetry are still compelled to try the old cut-and-run method of getting out.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
SOONER OR LATER.

,"I see where domestic peacemaker was hurt by jumping from a train while on his way to reconcile a warning couple"
 Well. the chances are he would have gotten hurt anyhow"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
THE WAY IT LOOKS.

Do you think Roosevelt will run for the presidency again? ?"
 Good heavensl What do you think he's doing now?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

course, the United States population is far ahead of that of those two coun- tries put together. The volume and variety of its activities are greater than those of the two others in the ag- gregate. It's wealth is three times as great as that of both those countries
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Colonel Roosevelt despises grouse shoot. ing. and Europe has no jungle.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Hut I am constant us the northern star, Of whose true-fx'd and resting quality There is no fellow in the Armament.
 Julius Caesar.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

$. P. Kennedy of Calh oun county is in Birmingham. He is one of the seven candidates for the position of railroad commissioner. Two are to be elected and his friends are predicting that he will be one of them. MT. Kennedy was for three years secretary of the Ala bama railroad commission.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

All explorers are acquiring the habit of climbing Mount Mckinley pr. Cook alone excepted.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
About Persons

J. A. Emery of New York, formerly general manager of the Birmingham Railway, Light and Power company, is here and will rnmain for day or
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Chicago has seen the comet, and it may insist on counting it in the census.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The comet may be able to put Tom Taggart in the Senate, but nothing of less size could.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The Knocker cannot knock with will and venom in frosty weather.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Gary has 300 saloons which will certain y be able to satisfy the thirsty at the sfarf
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The Southern league declined on Mon day to meet Jack Frost and fight it out.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

Kermit is having the bulliest time of all of them, for he has no speeches to write.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

The high cost of living is driving stand patters out of Washington.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

l The humble horse-drawn vehicle is still retained by a few old-fashoned people who do not desire to aggrandize any further John D. ----s.-----, Minister Calhoun has been presented to the prince regent in China, and he is now ready to discuss trade and politics in high places.
 It is every mans duty to see that he is listed in Uncle Sams great decennial count. the thirteenth of long series.
 
 The comet may be visible to the naked eye, but the naked eye is not willing to work overtime on frosty mornings.
 -.s- The cold wave has added to the profits of cold storage. It is an i'll wind that blows nobody any good
  Prisoners who cannot write poetry are still compelled to try the old cut-and-run method of getting out.
  All explorers are acquiring the habit of climbing Mount Mckinley, pr. Cook alone excepted. The comet may be able to put Tom Taggart in the Senate, but nothing of less size could.
  Kermit is having the bulliest time of all of them, for he has no speeches to write.
 Gary has 300 saloons which will certain ly be able to satisfy the thirsty at the start.
  The Southern league declined on Mon day to meet Jack Frost and fight it out. Chicago has seen the comet, and it may insist on counting it in the census.
  Colonel Roosevelt despises grouse shoot ing. and Europe has no jungle. The Knocker cannot knock with will and venom in frosty weather. The high cost of living is driving stand patters out of Washington. The drug habit is rarely cured except by an overdose
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28
BEER SICKNESS AT CARY

The drug habit is rarely cured except by an overdose.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1910-04-28

No communication will be published without it's authors name. Re1ecteu manuscript will not be returned unless stamps are inelosed for that purpose
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
TEACHERS REQUEST
AID FOR SCHOOLS

The interests OF the District in the
pending bill for the Government sup
port Of agricultural and industrial edu-
cation in public schools was explained
TO the Senate Agricultural Committee
today ny DIT. George z. Myeuz, principal
of the Mckinley Manual Training School
and Miss Emma Jacobs, director Of In
dustriaI and Home Economies in the
Washington schools.
They sad Washington people vveer in
terested in II and urged that the District
should be included in the benefits Of the
bill
Dr. Myers said that as an indication
of the interest of the people here in this
class of educational work, seventeen
teachers Of the Mckinley School had
volunteered to conduct 4 night school
and that 60 students had enrolled for
industrial courses under the new system.
He said that children needing this class
Of training had undoubtedly been cheat
ed by the public school systems Of the
country, which had failed to provide IT.
Miss Jacobs Contended that the do
nestle science feature Of the bin was
highly important She said the sub
iects OF sanitation and pure food for
the homes were important COuSideTa-
tons and that they alone would Justify
the appropriations asked for.
It is estimated that under the present
OH the District viii receive about s60o09
Of Government money for its public
schools
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
BARONESS
SOUGHT IN FAR WEST

CHICAGO. April ia search OF this
city for Baroness De Forrest a favOrite
at the British court. and Lieut.. II. Y 5.
Ashton. Of the Second Life Guards. Of
England. who two months ago. eIoped
from the country seat Of the baroness
near London. has been completed by
Henri de MERCER and Col. George BOyn-
ton. agents of Baron de Forrest They
left for California where they hope TO
find the clippers.
a worldwide search has been made
for the couple. Representatives Of the
baron hunted various foreign lands
Finally il was discovered they had come
TO the United States, and for the last
week the search centered here
An attempt TO conceal the facts con-
corning the elOpement was made by the
baron who believed II would oe easier
20 trace them IN secret The facts soon
became public, and since then the search
has been conducted openly
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
TROUSERS URGED
FOR NUDE STATUES
New England Blue Law
Legislation Expected
TO Pass.

BOSTON. April Is.-Trousers for Bay
State statues is the latest possibility IN
New England blue law legislation which
Is interesting lawmakers in the general
court OF the State here.
What is described as the nude statue
bill has just been brought before the
house OF representatives by Representa-
tive Mildram, and If It passes the art
museums of the State viii have either
10 put cylindrical or bifurcated draperies
on their works Of art Or exclude al per
sons under eighteen from the sculpture
and paintings on view
Behind the bin are petitions with
10000 names Of church members at
tsched, and its passage is believed prob
able.
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
BRIG. GEN. 7. H. BLISS
TO BE ACTING CHIEF

Owing To the absence in Cuba Of Maj
Gen Leonard Wood. Brig Gen Tasker
H. Bliss. president Of the war college, viii
become acting Chief Of staff upon the relief
from that oface OF Mai Gen. J. Franklin
Bell on April %
It is understood that when he Is relieved
General Bel wiz take a long leave Of alb
sence. IS he Is not due IN the Philippines.
where he viii command the Philippine
division. until some time next winter. Cen
eraI Woods Official duties in South america
where he goes as delegate 70 the Centenary
Celebration at Buenos Aires. VII occupy
h i'm for several weeks. and he is not eX-
peCted to assume his duties as Chief OF
STAFF until the latter part Of June
The Washington times., 1910-04-13

$500 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
$500 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
81 90 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
SII so Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
$3.50 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
$500 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced o.
S2400 Brass Trimmed White Iron Beds reduced to
The Washington times., 1910-04-13

cent act Of Congress. expressly declares
Il &c be non-SectaFlans and, IN point
IF fact, several denominations are rep
resented upon its board OF trustees.
The committee then proceeds 20 show
that the university Is not strictly =
private institution and that the most
that can be said abOu il is that il is
a pTfFaelE controlled and privately sup
ported college of a quasi-pubiic char
acter, and that i has never paid a
dividend TO any person or corporation
The committee deplores the fact that
there does not exist IN the District any
publicly endowed or supported school.
wherein the white youth OF the city NAV
receive a college training at public ex-
pense. The Morrill, fund would Unques-
uonably go TO such institution here, II
Il existed, says the committee report
C w o. GETS Fund
But for the present. continues the
report, the funds carried in the Morrill,
acts must be expended through the
George Washington University OF their
benefits entirely withheld from the citi-
zens Of the District
IN conclusion the report says that the
committee deems II wise that a time
limit should be put upon the grant and
that therefore the act restricts the
designation 20 three years At that
time. the committee viii. II fl sees
proper. renew the grant The sum OF
50 annually is also fixed as The maxi
mum that may be charged for tuition on
the subjects covered By the Morrill,
acts
The committee feeIs that with these
limitatlons-the restrictions which viii
compel congress 10 take the matter up
for consideration again at the end OF
three years, and the requirement that
Iees charged snail be merely nominal
every reasonable objection 20 the IeEis-
p
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
TAKING EGGS TO MARKET.

HARRISONBCRG, Va. April I2--Pat-
rick Shiffett. Of Bacon Hollow. started
across the Blue Ridge mountains Mon
day with 500 es-Es in a road wagon for
E-lkton. the shipping point for the Baiti-
more market While descending the
mountain q hind wheel came of. Shift
fett VIII not snip this week
The Washington times., 1910-04-13
Belief Prevails That His APP
poinment Would Stop
Albany Inquiry.
FLOCK IN
TO PREVENT PROBE
Party Ruin Is Predicted If Sc
cretS of Past Are
Revealed.

ALBANY, y. Y, April 1s.-Bribe
sivers are rushing to the capital Men
who In the past were prominent in
shaping legislation, amazed and fright
ened over the prospect Of having the
public know" are franticslly endeavor-
ing TO stave OF real legislative in
vestigation.
u viii ruin abe party" they declare.
and they are begging their friends in
the Legislature 10 emascUlate the in
vestigation resolution now being con
sIdered by the Senate finance commit
tee
Meanwhile, the strongest boom for
any man ever developed in this city has
been started for Governor Hughes 10
succeed the late Justice Brewer on the
Supreme Court bench. The men who
for months have characterized Hughes
as an animated feather duster'' now
tell sH who viii listen of his wonderful
judicial talents.
White Would Succeed.
Il these men can have their way.
Hughes viii 90 TO the Supreme Court
Re refuses TO discuss the suggestion IN
any way, but his friends are talking for
him. They declare the suggestion is 70
get him out Of the way so that Horace
White, now lieutenant governor, can
take his place
White is an oId-line politician and II
he should succeed Hughes the old
guard believes II would be safe These
iutimates Of the governor say IL is In
conceivable that ne will take any step
that VIII prevent him doing his duty as
ne sees II and driving 10 oblivion the
bTtvbe-givers and bribe-takeTs who have
sc->ndalized the State for years
Long Vacations Planned.
II is common rumor that certain indi-
viduaIs who have been active in shaping
legislation are arranging for lengthy "a
cations in anticipation Of the promised
legislative investigation. When the life
Insurance investigation was held certain
men went abroad and stayed there. It
Is the same class that plan to 90 again
should the necessity arise
The thing that hurts most is the IT,
port that documentary evidence. known
10 exist. IS being spirited away. Until
an vestiEstion is authorized. and sub
pOenaes can issue Il is impossible to
prevent this and because OF this fact
the men who want the investigation
are urging haste.
It become known today that the op-
position 70 the legislative investigation
viii come in the assembly. II at ali
Speaker WadswOrth, a son Of former
Congressman Wadsworth. and Leader
Merritt are on record as opposing such
an iuQEiry, but the advocates Of II de
Clareo today that when the matter IS
considered they cannot hold their fol-
lowers, and that the assembly viii con
cur IN the senate resolution y hiCh Is
70 call for a sweeping investigation
The Norfolk weekly news-journal. (Norfolk, Neb.) 1900-19??, 1910-06-10

Hollow.
Mrs. |. J. Daniel arrived here Satur-
day from oklahoma for visit with
relatives and friends.
L. c. Dewitt was here Sunday from
Omaha visiting with his brotherin.
law, Charles Hansen, and family.
The German Frauen-Nerein will
meet Thursday afternoon with Mrs.
Fred Fuerst, sr.
Auger's big show will exhibit here
IN large tent Saturday afternoon.
A large crowd attended the Memo.
rial day exercises Monday, and fine
program was carried out. Hon. Willis
II. Reed of Madison delivered an i'm.
pressive GRAFTON ON the occasion of
tho day. In the evening the opera
house was packed to see the play,
"The Siege of Richmond" by the Ken
nedy Stock company. The play was
well received.
Attorney William Rooney Is here ON
short visit NJ the home of bis pa
rents.
G. A. Martin Howard Miller and
others went to Holt county Wednes.
day for a fishing trip at blackberry
lake. They took their steamboat
along.