Atlanta semi-weekly journal. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1898-1920, 1910-06-21
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fell upward to the height you men,
tion," dib Hon. Hubbard like a squash.
But I cannot be amazed at water when
it merely falls down."
Go back to East PEORIA" 1 dement,
while Hon. Hubbard depart away under
his flop-brimmed hat.
rs there any historical event or
other untruthful anecdote connected
with this falls?" require Mayor Gay
nor with hopeful expression of a Dem
ocratic candidate.
Il can easily make you one, re-
port chiyalrously when the Pilgrim
Fathers landed at Plymouth Rock they
was dissatisfied with that chicken
named place, because real estate was
spoiled by disgusting Indian neigh
bors; so they take that yacht May
flour, and they sail up the Delaware
river Captain of this ship was Hon.
Benz. Franklin, the man who discov-
cred lightning. For pilot him where
to go was Miss Poky hauntus' beauu-
full Indian palmist. Hon. Franklin
knew even less about rivers than
member Of the rivers and harpors
committee, so he were very glad this
red lady was along.
so they floated upstream 40 or %
days. Tiresome fatigue felt by all.
But one brite afternoon, Miss Foxy
Hauntus begin to show nerVus symp-
toms Of thumbs and elbows.
benz Franklin she say Indianomi-
cally If you continue floating up TINS
river you will eventually hit something.
What should we hit, sweet copper
EN1-ar1 I'LL wi
flirting eyebrows peculiar to Philadel-
ohia.
Niagara Falls, please, confuse little
Poky.
Poosh and tish?' dib Hon. Benz.
scornly I have never heard of Niagara
Falls. How can we hit something L have
never heard of? Nextly you will be tell
ing me we shall be hit by Halley's COM
et.' Pooh-pOOh for him.
"'Ah, magnifiuous fat sir decry Poky
Hauntus, L shall not deny your pro-
lessor mind. But Niagara Falls hurts
when he hits. We shall be killed. 1t
Is not good for Indians to be killed
"a dead Indian does not SPOIL decry
Hon. Franklin, who was fond of quota
tons from Kipling.
But suddenly, whilst he spoke, .
SMASH! That ship 'Mayfiour' was
tunked against Niagara Falls with such
bounce that it was gashed to tooth
picks. Nearly all the ancestors of Bos-
ton was drowned in the fiossy water
But Hon. Benz. Franklin and Miss Poky
Hauntus swum affectionately ashore
arm finland. Beside each other they sat
on a rock for dry-clothes entertainment
80 We have been hit by Niagara Falls.
explain Indiana Maid pointing to this
hui flop of water splitting like an ocean
falling out Of balloon.
"T shall notice 1t next time l see Z,
commend Hon. Franklin with Saturday |
Evening Post expression of jokes.
80 they was married; because it is
improper for Young Persons to look 1T
Niagara Falls unless they are bride and
groom"
When I anish this historical event Ill
couples present blosh so
loud you could hear it above the whoop-
ing of the Falls.
Next sight to seen was Bridal Veil
Falls where Cousin NOgi took us by tai
ented crank-up of Hon. Ottomobile. Them
l6 new-wedding couples ariz upward ON I,
their feets to see this great matrimonlal
scenery. All see with joyful oh-crtes.
So 1 upraise my megaphone and parade
intelligent Lectures;
New groomed brides, l wish for you
TO look at this Nature now rushing be-
for you. 1t is called Bridal Veil Falls,
because it look like miles o. Irish lace
tumbling across the rocky face of Ma
ture. Why is this famous downpour like
(answer Of why is?' from
l6 double voices.) Because Marriage
chuckles smoothly until 1t hits sharp
cliff, then it jumps of with below OF
angry rages-loud yellup of Disguised
whirlpools, splatter and fractured pud-
lies, until Love arrive down with
splash and quiet forever. Matrimonial
marriage is oftenly thus"
How like. Ella Willer Wheelcox you
talk!" suggest Mayor Gaynor, who is
educated in all classic illusions.