davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
A Reluctant Candidate.

During local election In German
town only one man appeared at the
nomination desk.
Whom do you nominateT' inquired
the official
Myself" was the answer.
do you -accept the nomination.
''Well, no.
The officer laughed and said:
Then We must try again. Whom
do you nominateY
Myself
You accept the nomination."
mo"
A su5dued "Donnerwetterr' escaped
the lips of the perplexed official. but
he went on:
For the third time. whom do you
nominateY
Myself" came the inyariable reply.
DO You accept the nomination."
The man rose up. and a smile Of sat
isfaction spread over bis face as he
answered proudly:
Having been three times solicited
by my fellow citizens to accept the
nomination. l can no longer decline TO
accede to their wishes" He then re-
tired.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
In the Nick of Time.

The steamer was on the point Of
leaving, and the passengers lounged
on the deck and waited for the start.
At length one of them espied a cab
In the far distance, and it soon be-
came evident that the driver was do
ing his level best to catch the boat
Already the sailors hands were on
the gangways, and the cabs chances
looked small indeed. Then sportiye
passenger wagered a sovereign TO a
shilling that he would miss it. The
offer was taken, and at once the deck
became a scene Of wild excitement.
Hell miss itr'
mo; he'll just do it.'
"C0me On!'
"He won't do it!''
Eyes, he will. He's done I'll Hur-
rahv
In the very nick Of time the cab ar
rived, its occupant sprang out and ran
up the one gangway left.
"Cast off," he cried
1t was the aptain.-Pearson's Week
ly.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
The Fun Of the Farce,

1t Is related that the manager of a
theater consented to hear In his room
young man who had an unfortunate
impeachment In his speech read short
farce, the sole condition being that it
should not occupy more time than 1t
took to finish the cigar the manager
had just lit They both started, the
one reading, the other smoking, but as
the mild Havana gradually grew
shorter the worse the young author
spluttered. They finished together. or
course the question was Immediately
put, What do you think Of IT,"
"Well,' replied the manager, 'it's not
a half bad idea. Father, mother, lover,
daughter, all suffering, will be novelw
The author, furious, exclaimed: ''They
don't stammer! II is only my misfor-
tune"
''Oh, then, the play isn't funny at
all! Sorry that / can't accept it." re-
turned the manager.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
ApprselatIvs.

A housekeeper who has been en-
ploying a coIored washerwoman for
several months. was surprised to see
her appear last week 10 hat trimmed
heavily with Grape.
why. julia" she asked, SIS any Of
your family deadT'
mo. no." was the reply. but one OF
my best customers gave me this hat,
and didn't want her TO think I don't
'precfate nolszin'."
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

1t Is commonly accepted belief that
nothing short Of being pried loose VIII
induce a bulldog to give up his grip
ON another dog or on an intruder, but
this is mistake. A little household
ammonia poured on him as near his
nose as circumstances VIII allow viii
make him let go Immediately. The
fumes OF ammonia are so oyerpower-
Ing that dog cannot possibly main
tain his grip and his breath at the
same time-Country Life In America
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Whv He Cried.

The sympathetic nelghbor asked: "Is
your little brother III this morning.
Johnnie? | heard him crying In the
most heartrendIng manner"
"No; not exactly" Johnnie explained,
"but Willie pulled down a jug of mo-
lasses on himself in the pantry. and
mother has been trying to comb his
r"-Exchange.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
livinastone.

OF DR.. Livingstone it was said by
Stanley that the missionary lived for
years among the most cruel and ig-
norant savages in the world. but he
never fired shot in anger, never
"clubbed or clouted or banned or blast
ed" His manner was that of ''cool,
wise old man who felt offended and
looked grave"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
,mprcvina on Euclid.

The Pioneer OF Allahabad tells
stories. OF some kindergarten" classes
In the English army. Among the def
nitions given in an examination Is one
Of a circle peculiarly happy, which
gives a freshness to Euclid. 1t is, "A
straight line which starts at u certain
point and gets back to the same point
as quickly as possible
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Salutina With the Hat.

Before the invention of wigs the hat
was rarely removed except to salute
others, especially royal Dersonages. 1t
was worn at table when ladies or per-
sons of rank were present Except
when saluting ROYALTY 1t was the Gus
tom merely to raise the hand to the
hat somewhat after the manner Of a
military salute. When it became the
mode to wear profusion of false hair
the hat was less needed as a protec-
ton for the head and was carried I'M
der the arm.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Above Her Business

The tall man came into her little
blue kitchen and looked over the
shelves which were just beneath the
level of his head, but above hers. He
ran his finger over one shelf, then
showed it to her. 1t was pretty black.
"You are nice housekeeper," he
said.
people" she explained falteringly. 1T
was made for little ones. New York
Press.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

Good shouted the friend OF the
bibliophile as the latter emerged from
the burning house carrying bundle
OF books. Did you save your Shake
speares =
~No." replied the biblIophile. comb
ing q spark out OF his whiskers; II
saved my Bacon"-Houston Post.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Crude Logic.

1t Is told of an East Indian law stu
dent that he once threw his examiners
into confusion by declaring matrimony
to be an illegal state. How so? How
so?" he was asked by the perturbed
examiners, many of them married men.
The student smiled beetifically. Mar
mage" quoth he lis lottery, and lot
teries are forbidden by law"
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
IT'S Good Point.

But" asked the long haired young
man. sis. there nothing at all about
poetry that you like?'
YES" replied Crabbe. Whenever l
see poem 1t makes me feel good to
realize that there's no law TO compel
me to read it."-Catholic Standard and
Times
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
vour Chances.

but the great chances come and go and
never come again. If we could look
back over the lives OF the people by
whom We are surrounded, how many
great and rich opportunities would we
see that they have permitted to drift
by them unimproyed.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
A Frequent lnsincerity.

''The mans own words prove him a
prevaricator." said Mr. bubbles.
.'In what way?"
He writes me an insulting letter and
signs 1t Yours respectfully Wash
ington Star.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Line ON Hienkyns.

Lawson-What sort Of man is Bjen-
kyns, anyway.
Dawson-Weil. his wife always goes
with him when be buys suit OF
clot Somerville Journal
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
circumstane.s Reversed.

Unkempt Smith, Mister. would youse
kindly help poor man as Is all In.
down and out? Jocular Citizen Why.
certainly. Just climb the Gre escape
on that skyscraper- across the street
and walk In on the top floor. Then
you will be all out. up and in.-Judge's
Library.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Timely Warnina.

Proprietor am satisfied with your
work, Pusher. and / will raise your
salary from SO to S12 a week; but,
mind. that does not mean that you
must go and get married on the
strength of it.-New York Times.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Perfectly Cool.

Mr.. Figg-Gasser says he kept per-
fectly cool last night when that bur.
glar got into the house. Mrs. Figg-
So his wife told me. She found him
trying to hide In the refrigerator.--
Boston Transcript.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

Orange salad Is quickly made and
win help out many a hurry up meal.
Simply peel large seedless oranges and
break the sections apart Lay the
pieces on lettuce and serve FFeaeh
dressing with them. Chill before serv-
ing
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
PRESBYTERIAN.

Rev. James NJ. Duer, Pastor.
Preaching at 1890 a. M, and 80 p. m. Sum
day.
Sunday School at IL m.
Ups G E meeting at $50 D. M
intermediate G meeting at $50 d. m.
Junior p G Z meeting at 800 D. m.
Sunday school at west side chapel every Sum
Gay at 800 O'Clock.
Sunday school at the Hull Memorial Chapel
every Sunday afternoon at O'clock
Prayer meeting on Thursday evening at 30.
A cordial invitation is extended to all serv-
ices and privileges.
The Ladies' Aid Society will meet Wednes-
day afternoon in the church parlors. and will
hold an indoor picnic.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
METHODIST.

Rev. F. Fl. Brigham. Pastor. BOG Franklin st.
Services at 10:40 a. m. Sunday.
Sunday School $50 a. m
Services at 7:45 Sunday evening.
Mission Sunday School. SIS Lincoln Ave. (off
9th street, 2;3 d. m.
West Side Mission meets In the church audi
forum at three O'Clock.
Epworth League Sunday at $50 d. m.
intermediate League Sunday at 400 %. m.
The Ladies' Foreign Missionary Society will
meet Wednesday afternoon in the church.
Entertainers. Mesdames A. A. Hooper, j. A.
Jones, Robt Kickbusch and VIM. Convey.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Not Always.

Tommy-Pop, what il the difference
between probability and possible
fly? Tommy's Pop-A probability. my
son. Is something you want TO hap
pen.-Philadelphia Record.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

You can live forty days without food.
but you cannot live four minutes with
out air. These things being true, IL It
wise to stun ourselves with food and
starve ourselves for want OF ARR
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
ST. JOHNS cHvacH
AEploCOpdi.t
MoClaliaY. an6 Eotn rth cfpaofS

Mcclellan and Fourth streets.
Rev..W. Everett Johnson Rector. SIS Fourth
street.
Sunday services-Holy Communion at 1880
a. m.
Morning Prayer and Sermon at $50 a. m.
Evening Prayer and Sermon OF 80 d. m.
Sunday school at IL m.
St. Martha's Guild will meet Wednesday
afternoon with Mrs. VIM. Gillian. at the
Naples.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
TAUGHT Him sLesson.

why don't you give your wife an
afiowancef"
Il tried that once, and she spent Ii
before could borrow 1t back Louis
vile Courler-J Journal.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

my wife always consnlts me about
every article Of attire she buys-frocks.
hats. shoes gloves. everything"
MY wife does. too-that IL. she asks
ne for the money
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
CHURCH ITEMS.


BAPTIST.
Rev. G. G. Crippen, Pastor.
Services Sunday. Preaching at ii:0s a. m.
and rs D. m
Sunday School at 10 a. m.
Junior Society at 800 D. m.
b Y p q 6:45 D. m.
Prayer Service. Thursdays at 7:45 D. m.
Seats free.
The Ladies' Aid Society meets Wednesday
afternoon with Mrs. 6. c. Crippen, 2l0 McIndoe
street.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Politics.

Novice-They tell me that a man
can't go into politics and remain hon.
est. Old Stager-Yes. he can. But 1t
isn't necessary.-Chicago Tribune.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Mean Lander

Mrs. Uptown ito lady callerl-I do
think we've got the meanest. NEST pc
nursous and grssplng old Shyiock OF a
landlord that ever lived Caller-Why
do You remain here. then2 Why not
try some other place IL you don't like
the landlord Mrs. Uptown-That's
lust I'll He's that mean he won't let
as get far enough behind with the rent
70 It h really any object to rs to move.
Judges Library.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
uNivERsALisT.

Rev. T. b. T. Fisher, Pastor. III Warren.
Morning worship, with sermon, at 1920. All
welcome.
Sunday School at IL.
Women's Mission Circle meets on the second
Wednesday of each month.
There will be no Ladies' Aid Society meeting
this week.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
GERMAN BAPTIST

Preaching at $50 a. m. and 7:S0 D. m.
Sunday School at IL m.
Prayer meeting at 7:3 Thursday evening.
Women's Missionary Society meets on the
first Wednesday Of each month.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

Ever 60 10 that taiIory"
Yes. Most expensive man. ] got
.wo suits from him-a dress suit and
lawsuit "-Lippincott's
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

Success doesn't happen 1t Is or
ganized, pre-empted, captured by con-
eentrated common sense.-Frances e.
Willard
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
A Dozen Zoos.

The Teacher-How many eggs are
there In dozen? The Pupil-Five
fresh ones, Eve doubtful ones and two
bad ones.-Cieyeland Leader.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

No grip is so hard to shake or as
that of early convictions.-Maur
Thompson.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

"What do you thinkf Mrs. Zizza.
who never goes to church. has won the
flrst prize In the church lottery.
gendcrfer Batter.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
INFORMATION TO VOTERS.

A voter upon entering the polling
place and giving his name and resi-
dence, will receive ballot from the
ballot clerk which must have en-
dorsed thereon the names or initials
OF both ballot clerks, and no other
ballot can be used. Upon receiving
his ballot, the voter must retire
alone to booth or compartment and
prepare the same for voting. A bal
lot clerk may inform the voter as to
the proper manner of marking a bal
lot, but he must not advise or indi-
cate in any manner whom to vote
for.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
GERMAN "A e. chuaen

Preaching 1915 a.. and Z % 0p m. Sunday
Sunday School at 900 a. m.
Epworth League, Sunday at 700 p. m. and
Friday 7:30 d. m.
Junior League on Saturday at II rs a. m.
Prayer meeting in church at 1880 D. m
Wednesdays
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

N. Campbell, Secretary, 7l3 Fulton street.
Gospel meeting for men, at D m Sunday
Special singing.
Bible reading Tuesday at 3:3 D. m.
Bible class for ladies meets in the Association
parlors every Tuesday afternoon at $780,
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
ST. ..mrs. cArHo,,e CHURCH.

street.
Corner of Second and Grant streets.
Low mass at 100 a. M, high mass at 10 a. m.
Sunday School at 2:3 d. m.
Week days, low mass at s a. m. every day.
Ltany. sermon and benediction at 80 D. m.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
Omce of City Clerk.

March 26, 1910.
TO the electors Of the city Of Wdusdu,
Marathon county, Wisconsin:
Notice is hereby given that gen.
eral election for the election of city
officers is to be held in the several
wards in the city of Wausau, Mara
thon county, Wisconsin, on the 5th
day of April, 1910, at which the Of
ficers named below are to be chosen.
The names of the candidates of each
office to be voted for, whose nominal
tions have been filed in this office,
are given under the title of the office,
and under the designation in the
SamDle ballot below
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

The regular meeting will be on the last Fri
day of each month. at 3 O'Clock d. m.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
rlas1 c.uacs or csa,sr. sclrnrlsr-

FIRST CHURCH or cHaisr, sciEHTlsr.
On Mcclellan Street. between Second and Third
Streets.
Services: Sunday. 10:45 a. M: Sunday SchOoi
IL m; Wednesday evening, Testimonial Meet
ing. 7:45.
Reading Room in church edifce open daily
from to p. m, except Sundays and legal
holidays.
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29
FAC-SIMILE OF OFFICIAL BALLOT.

inserting writing in the of the candidate for
whom he wishes to VOTE in the space under the
printed names of the candidates for said Office
Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1910-03-29

As all of the candidates running without party
designation it will be necessary for the make
mark in the square at the right of the name
of the candidate for whom he intends to vote or by
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1910-01-27
The Occult in Fiction.

Morgan Robertson, writer OF sea
tales, presents curious problem
in the story called The Mate OF
His Soul, which appears in the
first February issue of the fort
nightly Popular Magazine.
One of the characters is strong
muscled, hardhitting man with a
highly combative temperament.
The other is a fairhaired, pink
faced young fellow with the pc
culiarities of milksop. When
these two men meet a strange
thing happens-the strength and
temperament of the stronger is
communicated to the weaker and
the mildtempered youth becomes
the very incarnation of fury when
when the mate of the deepwater
vessel on which he ships before
the mast tries to enforce obedience
with a Delaying pin. 1t is in many
ways a remarkable story and we'll
worth reading.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1910-01-27
AinsIee's.

If there is a virtue which the
reading public delights to honor in
an author, it is versatility. To
see a writer, noted for q special
type of story. do something entire
" different and do it as we'll or
better than his other popular work,
is to catch glimpse Of genius.
George Barr McCutcheon has ex-
hibited bit of it in his story
which appears in the February
Ainslee's-The Butterfly Man. As
a piece of character drawing the
story is certainly above the average;
as q social satire it is immense.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1910-01-27

When the chains that now bind me are severed,
And freedom, hope shall impart
When the confidence Of man, now denied me,
Is restored with fullness OF heart;
NV life in the future I'll model
By no standard beyond my own sphere,
But TIL meet the troubles and sorrows
AS I've met them and conquered them here.
To Him, who has aided and guided
And stood by my side mid this strife,
I'll still continue to pray for the strength
To resist the temptations Of life.
While to those whose kind aid has cheered me,
When lost courage my pathway assailed,
I'll endeavor to prove they've not toiled in vain
By succeeding where others have failed.
IF the world should in scorn turn to question
The deeds of the past will say:
"Don't judge me alone by the life have lived,
But the life I am living today
For since have paid without finchng,
For my folies, the price doubled, why not,
Let me ask, should I fail to be guided
By the lesson this experience has taught2
Young Steady
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1910-01-27
SKIPPER AND MISS.

There was Captain of ship,
Who, when he spoke smote thigh and hip.
His voice was loud, resonant, full,
Like the deep roar of an angry bull.
But when he laughed his laugh was free,
Danced his blue eyes right merrily.
His lips, by mustache and beard o'erlaid,
Opening, two rows of teeth displayed,
Healthy, clean and wondrous white,
Firm and strong enough to bite.
A reckless, rollickine skipper, he,
Cursed and prayed alternately.
Yet most things with firm patience bore,
Often laughed, though he often swore.
One day, to him maiden said:
"Your language, sir, is shocking!"
The skipper, (who was rudely bred,)
Answered, "quit your knocking?'
-"Wby don't you choicer language use?"
My language then its force would lose.'
"Such epithets! Upon my word!'
Remarked the skipper, you're absurd
"Have you no fear of being struck?"
Said he, Il fear no such darned luck
"Sir! PoitenesJ would not be amis."
The Skipper ans cred, with kiss.
ID. M.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1910-01-27
The Local collllnissaTy.

The local boarders and others
no doubt will be pleased to know
something as to the amount of
meat and vegetable supplies House
Steward Anderson uses in feeding
them The supplies here given
are those used in feeding the pris-
oners only at the old prison and
the quantities are for period of
one week.
The following meats are used in
making up the prisoners bill OF
fare for one week: 1850 pounds
of fresh beef, It's pounds of livers,
225 pounds of mutton, 3S0 pounds
] of pork shoulders, 220 pounds of
sausage, It's pounds of Vienna
sausage. 100 pounds of Bo ogna,
16O pounds of bacon, 220 pounds
Of sugar-cured hams, 200 pounds
of salt pork.
On holidays there are provided
700 pounds of turkey, 500 pounds
of chicken or 400 pounds Of veal.
Each week there are consumed
in feeding the local residents, ex-
elusive of officers, SO bushels of
potatoes, 6 bushels Of beets, 8
bushels of parsnips, il bushels of
carrots, s bushels of onions, 8 BUSH
els of turnips, 500 pounds of cab
bage, 800 pounds of dried navy
beans, 100 pounds of dried peas,
so gallons of sauer kraut and one
barrel of cucumber pickles.
The dried fruits used weekly are:
so pounds of apples, 100 pounds
of apricots, 100 pounds of
peaches, l25 pounds of prunes, 125
pounds of figs and so pounds of
raisins.
In addition to the above the
weekly supply carries rs pounds
of oatmeal, $50 quarts of milk, 60
pounds of butter, so pounds of
cheese, 60 gallons of syrup, $50
pounds Of sugar, IS pounds of cof-
fee and % pounds of tea.
The above does not include the
New Prison. Last Summer straw
berries were furnished for supper
on several occasions.
Mr.. Anderson says the prisoners
: receive daily IL ounces of food
each and it is we'll cooked.
Last week the output of the loca
+: bakery was given showing the
amount of bread provided daily.
In addition to the food eacE
: prisoner receives weekly -four
ounces of tobacco, chewing o.
> smoking, as he prefers. There ii
maintained local tobacco manu-
8 featuring plant operated by an in
mate.