davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
American Noblemen.

An old saying is that the British shop
keeper dearly loves lord" but that the
British shopkeeper is not alone in his adj
miration for titles is evidenced on every
hand in our country. Titles We affect to
despise. as a people, and yet on every op-
portunity we give our legislators the
preface Hon" to their names, while the
wealth Of colonies" and generals" and
governors" has long been a fruitful
topic for our comic press.
The other day an American citizen
wrote 10 the State Department to ask
whether his acceptance OF a foreign title
Of nobility would operate TO annul his
American citizenship. He had been Of
fered a title. for service rendered, by the
Italian government. The State Depart
ment replied that the acceptance Of a
title would not work the expatriation OF
an American citizen, for a native Ameri-
can citizen can only divest himself OF
citizenship by becoming naturalized ac-
cording 20 the legal requirements Of some
foreign state, or by taking an oath Of
allegiance to some other nation. So that
if any American citizen desires 10 accept
from foreign government the title OF
lord or baron or count there is nothing
20 prevent him. and Count Silas Hopkins
or Baron Paul Jones are not impractical
bic as American citizens.
We have not had. fortunately, many
American noblemen. though the American
fair sex has awaited itself often Of the
opportunity TO take titles. and. strangely
enough, with all our aggressive patriot
ism, we do not seem TO think any the
worse Of them-not even when the mar
riage is an obvious device on the part Of
the titled bridegroom to bolster up fallen
fortunes with good, new American money.
curious change-curious and yet sub,
tle-is coming over American thought in
such matters. In the abstract. the old
idea Of Jeffersonian simplicity seems at
tractive, but IN practice it does not work
out AT a dinner party the man who
wears the ribbon Of a medal is envied: :
at a public gathering the 'honorables"
Ceven though they have no legal right 20
such a title are much sought after and
deferred to. We are committed 10 re-
publicanism and, in theory, to an alb
horrence Of class distinctions; yet as the
years go by we are doing much to build
up such distinctions. and. what is worse.
on an altogether artificial and meretri-
cious foundation.
As Audrey said:
Its a mad world. ny masters"
And madden in nothing than in this mad
race after artificial distinction; this sedu-
lous aping Of the pomps and ceremonies
Of the Old World. There. at least. the
titles mean something; they are a reward
for some sort Of service to the state. Here
they are not only meaningless and mostly
false. they are snobbish and symbols OF
vanity and vainglorious pride. We are
not ready yet for an order of American
noblemen. AS a people. 1t will be we'll
always for US to remember that
Kind hearts are more than eoronets
And simple faith than Norman blood
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
A Bcartown cherry picker.

From the Philadelphia Record
Mrs Mary Fassnacht. of Lititz, aged
seventy-three years and a grandmother.
did memorable thing while visiting a
daughter at Beartown last week. With
a basket in hand Grandmother Fass-
nacht climbed a cherry tree without the
aid Of a ladder, picking the fruit from
the topmast branches. When the basket
was filed she lowered it to the ground
with a rope 10 be emptied, and she con-
tinued picking until the tree was al
most cleaned Of cherries. Mrs. Fass-
nacht did it with ease and enjoyed doing
il, too.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
EFFECTS OF SUNLIGHT.
Cures Some Diseases, Causes Others.
ParasOls Are Recommended.

PnrasOls Are Recommended.
From tie Journal Of Homeopathy.
Sunlight increases the oxygen carrying
capacity OF the blood. increases the ex-
erection Of earbonic oxide. and the shorter
light waves seem to cause a beneficial
stimulation in the young Of many Of the
lower or higher animals as shown by
better development The idea is growing
that though mans protoplasm can func-
ton without this stimulation. yet he is
better OF If he has it and thus reaches
his highest vigor and efficiency.
The stimulation Of strong sunlight has
been frequently mentioned by literary
men Of genius. for with rare exceptions
they have very sensitive nervous tissue
in which the results would be most no
tieeable. Light baths are suggested for
sluggish metabOlism. an excellent remedy
In the case OF those Of sluggish chem
istry who are benefited by the slower
heat rays Of hot springs. spas. &c.
A doctor reports a cure Of ,aburcular
peritonitis in child Of nine by the use Of
condensed rays Of the sun. An Iowa
physician is having marked success in
treating tuberculosis Of the lungs. larynx.
&c. with concentrated suns rays. and in
this method the glass stops most OF the
ultra violent rays il not all. He shows
that the light penerates the body and
kills bacteria or inhibits them so that the
Increased vitality brought about by forced
nutrition and other means disposes OF
them and healing then occurs. He shows
that the light Is a stimulant. is absorbed
by the cells, and causes definite chemical
changes.
Sunlight kills bacteria. but we ignorant
~ fail TO reflect It has just as fatal effect
on the protoplasm. which composes the
human system. Sunlight is producing
headache, insomnia. ccnjunctival irrita-
ton, skin diseases, nasopharyngeaI dtsor-
ders. thermic changes. insanity. suicide,
neurasthenla. and cardiac feebleness. 50
those Of as who wish to promote health.
sanity, and long life must raise our para
soils on going into the sunlight. hunt the
SHADE OF dark houses. take or advise a
seat IN the shade OF the old apple tree.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
SUMMER PHILOSOPHY.

The white clouds are a-driftin'
In white 60 as you please
And the oak trees are a-iiftin'
Their broad branches in the breeze.
An mockin' bird IS tunin
Up the pipes that's in his throat
And the field lark is a-crOOnin'
A preliminary note.
An 7 take my rcd bandanna
An / wipe away III sweat.
An I smile back az tn Gamma
Bloomin' red-Im wringin' wet
Fer I've found IL amt no matter
What the trouble that you're in.
There can't any trouble batter
Down the brcastworks q a grin.
Some one SAYS: "wowl this Is summer,
Amt this here a whizzcr-whecr 20
An l say: Yep. it's a hummer.
But It amt too bot for me.
There's a little breeze A-blOwin
Cooler than the breath o. morn,
An the corn is Just growin'-
This Is what We need for corr.''
An the minute that ! say It
I can feel the little breeze.
Come a-whispeiin my way; Il
Comes a-bmshin' through the trees
And a-bendin' down the grasses
Oh acrOss the medder lot
And the cannas as Il passes,
Sngin': NO, II isn't hct."
And It ain'tl Guess Gods a-knowin'
What we're needin' rain or shine;
50 when the Wild winds a-blowin'
Why. l take the wind fer mine!
An when the hot suns a-peltin',
And a-blisterin' your skin.
An you're pretty near a-meltin'.
tn help some n re grin
Judd Mortimer Lewis. IN Houston Pes
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
MEN AND WOMEN DODGERS.
Louisville Landlady Tells why She
Prefers Former, Five 90 One.

Louisville Landlady Tells why She
Prefers Former, Five 30 One.
From the Louisville Times.
Men" said the pretty Second street
widow. who owns a big rooming house.
'are pretty much on the square as far
as I find them, and don't mean 70 say
by that that women are not Tell the
truth, though, would rather have Eve
men in my house than one woman. Here
is the reason: The other day 7 rented
an apartment 10 a girl She was pref
", dainty creature. who told me that
she had "a place at a glove counter in a
big store downtown. I have no reason
70 think that she has not
The first night that she came home
she had about three handkerchiefs that
she wanted TO wash out 1 got the hot
water for her. Next evening she came
in with request that she be allowed the
use Of my range and kitchen 10 heat
some irons and smooth out a dress skirt
that had been damaged by ra.a. Next
evening she wanted TO borrow my can Of
gasoline 20 clean pair of gloves. Last
nlght IL was necessary 10 mend a pair or
hose. I'm wondering what is going 70
happen TO that girl next
Just 10 show you the difference"
continued the little widow. "a man came
here a week ago and applied for a room.
hadn't anything attractive, but showed
him the best IN the house.
It's good enough for me- he declared.
water and towel in the morning 10
wash my face He has been in the house
week, and have never seen him since.
except when he came TO pay the week
rent. OF course. this is all pretty hard to
say against women, but it's fact. and
every rooming house owner in Louisville
knows it. that women are hard to take
care Of"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
The PathOs of the Prison Mark.

Under relatively unimposing head lines
and all but lost in a wilderness OF other
matter appeared in the current news Of
Friday the following:
Dependent. it is believed. because OF
inability 10 get a position after serv
ing a term in Trenton prison. Chandler
A. Hopper, thirty-four years old. hanged
himself during the night 10 a bed post IN
his house at Paterson. n. j.. where to-
day his lifeless body was found by his
wife. Hopper was released a year ago
from Trenton after serving sentence
for larceny, and since then had been
unable 20 obtain employment
The pathetic story related here is not
new. It does not astonish. nor does II
surprise. Hopper's fate arouses ones
pity, inevitably; but that is about all.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
MONDAY. AUGUST S. 1910.
Home News Away from Home

Washingtonians who leave the
city. either for a short or long
stay-whether they go to mountain
or oeashJre. or even across the sea
should not fail TO order The
Washington Herald sent 70 them
by mail 1t will come regularly,
and the addresses will be changed
as often as desired. It is the home
news you will want while away
from home. Telephone Main $500.
giving old ard new address.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

From the Chicago Tribune.
The lawyer for the defense found it
necessary 10 weaken the testimony Of
the principal witness for the prosecu-
ton.
Mr. Skybo." he said, proceeding TO
cross-examine him, did you ever live on
the sea coast?"
Yes. sir responded the witness: "I
have lived half my life in a sea-coast
town"
You are familiar, then, wiki salt wa
ter fsh?"
Yes sir"
We'll, just as a matter OF information.
viii you please tell me how a founder
swims-whether horizontally or vert!-
caly?"
''Why-er-
THAT is all. Mr.. skybo; you may
stand aside
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
An Ethical Problem.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger
Mr.. Speaker" said the member OF the
hobo congress. there are enemies IN our
midst. Great excitement) I observe
several persons present upon whose hands
are the marks OF honest toll"
The sergeant-at-arns win set busy"
ordered the speaker.
After this interruption debate continued
on the question, rs work a disgrace?" an
affirmative decision being reached, with
the understanding that gentlemen CO.
creed into laboring on the changing
were not 10 be considered eulpabIA
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

80 Johnny, you wish to be a boy
scout2"
Yes, dad"
''Well, those tall weeds in the back yard
would make excellent cover for an enemy.
I think it would be good military tactics
for you TO cut 'em down"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

According to Mr.. Ballinger, the report
that Mr.. Crane recently requested Mr..
Ballinger's resignation, or suggested It's
propriety. is perfectly true, save for the
more or less trihing circumstance that
Mr.. Crane never mentioned the matter
TO Mr.. Ballinger at all
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

From Everybodys
This clipping from French newspaper
is too good to keep from you: There was
found in the river this morning the body
Of soldier cut TO pieces and sewed up
in sack. The circumstances seems to
preclude any suspicion Of suicide"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Hail to the hobble skirt.-New York
Sun.
Yes, and also blow it.-Herald
Aye, and may it's rain be short-Boston
Transcript.
And when its days are over it never
will be mist.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Our consul at Rheims writes that cham
payne probably viii be higher in price
next year People who are now econ
Omizing 10 the limit on beefsteak will
be panied to learn, of course. that they
will also have to begin economizing on
champagne.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

BE careful TO save the girl in time"
cautioned the stage manager.
"Sir said the star. Il never spoil a
situation"
Bother the situation. A heavy bump
might spoil that cardboard locomotive
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

King Alfonso does not cut very heroic
figure as he journeys toward England
just now; but his majesty is consoled.
perhaps. In the thought that England
has Spain beaten to a fragile in the
matter OF safety and sanity at this pre-
else time
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
AvertInr Loss.

Pretty shrewd business man. that.
Hides the money at night and leaves the
safe wide open"
why does he leave the safe wide
open7"
He doesn't want valuable safe blown
apart"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

From The Philadelphia Public Ledger
Now, little boys" he concluded. what
may we learn from the brutal affair at
Reno
mot to scrap wit'out trainin' to de
minute" responded an observant youth.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

THE boat is late"
so I hear"
wait. and we'l see II locked"
do they always dock the boat for be-
ing late?"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Former Senator Chandler has decided
that he embraces She" and that,
therefore, a woman may legally be elect
ed governor Of New Hampshire. Begin
the Senator's pardon, the argument reads
as II It might have been promulgated by
a sweet summer girl.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
Good Business.

I think I'll go to Panama
And have a look:
Then put the things I never saw
Into a book.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Perhaps the people refused TO give
Nephew Robinson Congressional nomi-
nation because the people love Nicholas
Longworth too well TO do anything that
might tend TO diminish the splendor OF his
magnificent isolation.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
A Rough Diamond.

From the Chicago Record Herald.
When man is referred to as being "a
diamond in the rough" It is generally a
sign that he wouldn't be tolerated in de-
cent society If he didn't have a lot Of
money.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Grave fears were expressed that some
body might be ''assassinated' during the
course Of the Tom Watson Representa-
tive Hardwick debate In Georgia Sstur-
day. Each disputant merely attempted
TO "assassinate" the others character,
however
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Daniel NJ. McCaIley, OF Pittsburg. Pa,
who is interested IN the industry. and is
at the Arlington. in speaking Of roller
skating, said yesterday that there is no
more beneficial exercise than that OF
roller skating. He is Of the opinion that
the pastime should be taken up by young
and old.
Twenty years ago" said Mr. McCalley.
the pastime was fashionable for a time.
but the intolerable hardness Of the old
fashioned rings. which were constructed
OF unyielding asphalt. and the heaviness
Of the original type OF patterns which
were built OF lockwood, and were always
liable to break. soon caused a revulsion Of
feeling. In these days, however, tim
bered rings are used and the planks are
laid so that the skater need never cross
them in making his rounds. while every
decent pair OF skates is fitted with ball
bearings and aluminium rollers. so that
the weight has been reduced two-thirds
and the strength increased up 10 the limit
Of absolute safety II Is now possible
for the learner to fall with decent COM
fort, even II he is not acquainted with
the break falls OF jiu jitsu: and one can
skate for whole hour without contract
ing an ankle ache. which is-or rather
was 80 as painful and abiding as the
cramps experienced by an apprentice 10
the art Of running on snowshOes. In the
case of roller skating. as in that Of BIZ
cycling and other artificial pastimes.
modern improvements In equipment have
brought about a renewal Of popular favor
In many respects this pastime is an
admirable physical exercise. especially II
Il is practiced in the open air. II puts no
unusual strain on any one muscle or set
Of muscles. but develops and strengthens
the whole system. Thus the making OF the
figure s on rollers brings into play every
single muscle. Above all. it teaches that
power Of balancing the body which
Is a chief factor in so many other ath-
letic diversions. There is probably no
better or easier way OF interesting chill
dren in physical exercise
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Whatever the why's and wherefores Of
Miss Laura Jean Libbey's going on the
stage. II is distinctly refreshing 20 re-
fleet that she is not relying for success
upon the fact that she is the heroine
Of some sort Of scandal
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

shall girls flirt?" inquiries the Pitts
burg Post. And then It answers its own
query. "Now But they will. neverthe-
less and Notwithstanding.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

A Pennsylvania court has been called
upon to decide whether soap is medi-
cine. 1t IS to some few people. anyway.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Not even Mr.. Roosevelt can bring
about early peace in the Republican par
ty," says a political writer. Besides.
there is no Nobel prize offered for that,
ANYWAY.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Looks as II the ranks Of the lame
ducks" this fall may be augmented by
some erstwhile very bright and par
ticular stars
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

"Spreckels says that three money
kings aim TO rule the United States, ="
according TO the Philadelphia North
American. Even II plutocracy is stand
ing pat on three kings. however. the
common people may hold straight
flush.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
Widely Pushed.

A pleased customer Is the best adver-
tsement- Everybody pushes our goods. A"
What do you SELF"
''Lawnmowers"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

1--WE Americans are too modest and
retiring" says Mr.. John Kendrick
Bangs. Especially. of course. Chancellor
Day. Mr.. Bryan. and the Colonel.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

in hostility TO the Mexican war which
the annexation Of Texas had now brought.
Samuel J Tilden, a profound adnirer
of Van Buren,. became one Of their
younger leaders.
Now arose the strife over the WiImot
ProviSo- Upon this proviso the modern
Republican party was formed eight years
later; upon II, fourteen years later. Alb
raham Lincoln was chosen President.
and upon it began the war for the Union
All the Democratic members, as well as
the Wings from New York. and most
strongly the Van Buren, or Wright men.
supported the proviSo. The Democratic
legislature Of New York approved il BIZ
the votes Of the Wings with the Barn
burner and the Soft Hunkers. the latter
being Hunkers less friendly 10 slavery. It
passed the House at Washington by n
vote of s. to 81. but it was rejected by
the Senate. In the following December
the President again asked for the meas
ure and as most Of the Northern state
legislatures had declared in favor Of II.
bills were soon reported in both Houses.
and the following February Is the House
again passed It by a vote OF lis to lOs
Meanwhile, however, the Democratic
Senate had passed a similar bill without
the proviso, and this bill came up before
the House. The body in Committee of
the Whole voted to amend the Senate bill
by adding the proviso. but the proviso was
rejected by the Senate and the LII was
finally passed without IT,
In the slang nomenclature which New
York politics have always produced with
great fertility Hard-SheH and Soft-ShelI
were terms often used instead Of Hunker
and Barnburner
August s, 1852 the writ Of habeas cor
pus was suspended by the President. and
in 1870 the first yacht race was sailed to
establish title to holding Of the America
cup. II is the birthday Of Abner Nash
the North Carolina patriot Q7l0: James
Bowdoin. in whose honor the college was
named 0720; Benjamin Silliman. ST..
THE Nestor Of American Science" Q779
Charles A. Dana journalist uS1O: Mel
son A. Miles, the famous American fight
er dsas); Laurence Hutton. author and
critic dss3); the date Of the death Of Pope
Alexander VI, in 1903; George Canning.
English statesman. in 1927, and the as
lsassination Of Senior Canoyas del CASTLE.
in 1881.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Dr. Cook is said to be preparing for
another pole dash. The good doctor will
find the pole right where Mr.. Peary
left IL.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08
The Only Mny.

How can win you for my very OWN
You fellows might get up a rattle, an
swered the summer girl. I'm engaged to
seven of you"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

I'VE don't want Statewide prohibit
ton" says the Waco CTex) Tribune
That is no sign you are not going 10 get
*, however.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

But we will never mind the August
weather so long as the August breezes
continue to blow, OF course.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

He is a mighty pessimistic Democrat
who cannot go out nowadays and see a
rainbow. with the White House at one
end and the Capitol at the other.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

An Illinois man has patented a safety
pin with two points. Cheer up! II might
have been hatpin.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Uncle Joe has nothing TO say about
the Kansas primaries" says a contem-
porary. Nothing printable. at least
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

been a cheerful optimist in this world II
only he might have had a fair chance.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

The price Of rubber is continually ad-
vancing. Rubbernecks are still rated as
cheap skates however.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

That the people can and will arise In
their might the while 20 smite was
clearly demonstrated In Tennessee last
Thursday.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Of Don jaime If he were popularity known
as Don Jeemes." perhaps.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

The country Of the cheapest telegraph
and the cheapest railway rates Is not
America but Russia, according to The
Russian Road to China" by Liudon
Bates, If. Russian railroads extend al
most to Kashmir, only about 400 miles
from those of British India. When this
gap is crossed Calcutta viii be but elev-
en- days distant from London.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Col Henry WattersOn recommends but
termilk as the ideal summer drink.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1910-08-08

Exhibit in the Can't Come Back So
ciety-Judge Alton Brooks Parker.