The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1910-10-08
BILLY A NDDICK.

Until the close of the Parliament of 1887, all
scriveners, notaries public and land surveyors in
Great Britain and Ireland were paid so much per
word for all legal and judicial documents Never
did the ingenuity or inventive faculties of man
achieve such petty trumphs they did during
the century and half which preceded the Parlia-
ment of 1881 Indeed, for half century before
81 perverted ingenuity was not able to add soil
tary word the legal verbiage already stereOyped
in the language of the courts. Now that verbal
payment for public or legal documents no longer
obtains would quite naturally assume that these
documents would, in ordinary language, conform
to common sense. But such is the tenacity Of Gus
tom and the pertinacty of tradition that for more
than seventy years our lawyers, notares and at
torneys persist in repeating iterating and reterat
ing that Billy Paterson struck by somebody.
Take. for example, sentence from will copied
by our city newspapers a few days ago: 81, Sam
uel Slight being of sound, disposing, healthy mind
and memory and not acting under duress, restraint,
compulson, menace, fraud or undue influence, give,
devise bequeath and grant all, etc, etc" Now,
what useful purpose is served by unloading upon
the courts and the public all this verbal lumber
and absurd tautology!
The phraseology of indictments, wills, mort
cages, petitions and pleadings, in most instances,
is absurd and ridiculous Why should it be neces-
sary to say that 'the said Billy Paterson struck
by an instrument of wood commonly called club,
a billy, skull-cracker or night stick, and that the
party or parties unknown did, without any provo
cation, insulting language facemaking, grins as
sault of any kind nature whatsoever on the part
OF the plaintiff feloniously strike beat assault and
dangerously wound with said instrument of wood,
commonly called club, a billy. skull-cracker,
etc, etc p
Or why should it be necessary to state that Tom
Shelton, under indictment for hog stealing did
fraudulenty, wilfully and feIoniously steal take
swipe and carry away Murphy hogH" Why not
say Shelton stole the hog, and let t go at that!
If Jack Daw is charged with running blind
pig, why indic him with illegally selling whisky
brandy, ale beer, GIN wine other intoxicat
ing liquors, or mixtures of same contrary to law
and the statutes so provided"
Whe, the other day, we asked lawyer what
purpose was served, or why continue the old prac-
tice of the penny of the eighteenth cen
fury, in drawing up documents wills and the like
to pile words upon words to terate, reiterate and
repeat till even the astute and crafty lawyer of
Philadelphia confused and mystifed, "What is
it good for anyway"
"Well,'' said our legal friend, before [ began
the study of law, [ clerk in drug store.
One morning an old friend of mine and a rafting
good fellow came into the shop and said to me:
Billy, want bottle of ''Brode's Ease-All." what
is it WORTH" Dick [ whispered to him, its not
worth d cent but charge dollar for it"
$50 with the words in mortgages, wills, etc,
they're no use, but charge literally for them
So, now, when a spade is called an elongated
oblong instrument of manual labor used in digging,
litching, delving and removing soil, muck earth,
dirt, globe ground, real estate trash, mud debris,
sand, gravel and mixtures of same, we are reminded
IF what Billy said to Dick and let it go at that