davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29
A Pertinent Question.

Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Western railroad men declare that rail-
roads make no money carrying freight.
where do you get it, gentlemen"
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Colonel Roosevelt still insists that
he enjoyed the sham battle Emperor
William pulled off for him, but every
body knows the colonel was never
much for sham.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

The time is drawing near when
Little Johnnie must decide whether it
will be a toe or finger. Hurrah for
the Glorious Fourth!
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

subscribers leaving the city tenn
Porarily shouId have Ths Zee
mailed 10 them. Addresses will be
changed as often as requested.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

1t is beginning to look as II the
scales were tipping against the men
who fixed them, and there is no steel
spring in them now,
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

II is a mistake to say that perpetual
motion has never been accomplished.
What about congress?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

STATEMENT or CIRCULATION.
State OF Nebraska, Douglas County, ss;I
George Il. Txschuck. treasurer OF lhe
Bee Publishing Company, being duly sworn;
says that the actual plumber OF tull ana
complete copies of Tho Daily. Morning,
Evening and Sunday Bee printed during inc
month OF April 1910 Waa as follows;
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Perhaps the dog catchers got the
comet and amputated part of the tail.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Those who have faith may yet be-
lieve that June means to do the right
hing by us.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

The no-food fad does not promise
to become very popular, regardless OF
what prices may be.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Wall Street journal.
II only the Sugar trust had taken It all
out of the public and let the government
aIonet
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Kentucky is the greatest corn state
in the union, that is, liquid corn.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Unmarried women are permitted to
vote in Iceland. Yes, but what suf-
fragette cares to go to Iceland or to
stay unmarried?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Maryland has organized Mint
Julep league, What is this, simply
an attempt to harass Colonel Wat
terson?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

MY trouble is this" said the caller, "l
went through a mock marriage for fun
and now am told that the ceremony wai
legal and binding. Can l get out OF III?
Nothing simpler replied the lawyer
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Oh, somewhere in this favored land
the. comet is, shifting bright So why
should we worry longer?
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

He (sishingJ-''Would that both our
hearts BRAT as one!'
She (unmoved)--'woud that mine beat
as wonn-Judge.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29
DOMESTIC PLEAsANTRIEs.

Younglelgh--Which is the better way to
propose, orally or by letter?
Cynicus-By letter certainly. There's a
chance that you might forget TO mail it,
Boston Transcript.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

He vows that l am the first girl he
ever kissed"
truthY'
II don't know. II he is. he must have
practiced on a dummy, that's all -
Houston Post
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29

Entered at Omaha DostOffieo as second
class matter.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1910-05-29
Carlsbad -Sprudel
WASSER
The Genuine Brand

Anoues Msgnesis Water. at, bottle
l dozen, at ...,.... .,,...:,..:i III
Buffalo Lithia Water, II gal botN
do1Sn case 81 1870
dozen Gaze .......
Return allowance
Delivery free In or
Corner
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
The Fish. Against Tuberculosis.

Interest in the anti.tuberculosis cam
paign now being waged throughout the
United States is evidenced by the fact
that in the year 1909 163 new anti-tu-
berculOsis associations were formed.
133 tuberculosis sanatoria and hospit-
ais were established. and 81 tubercu.
losis dispensaries were opened. Com
pared with previous years. this Is the
best record thus far made In the fight
against consumption in this country.
During the year 1909. AZ more asso-
Citations for the prevention OF tubercu
losIs were formed than during the pre-
vious IL months. and g. more hospitals
and sanatoria were established. On
January !. 1910. there were In the Uni
ted States 39i anti-tuberculosis associ-
ations. 3S6 hospitals and tuberculosis
sanatoria and 2G5 special tuberculosis
dispensaries.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

this look after more than a half
hundred phones for the vermilion
County Telephone Co. ] sell gasoline
engines. corn-huskers. cream-separa.
tors. feed-grinders. by which you may
see I keep the blood circulating.
have a single cylinder . to 81 h.
p. engine in my blacksmith shop and
my wife uses 1t to run the washing
machine. churn. and cream separator.
and with this same power we pump
all the water, run the sausage-grinder.
emery-wheel. disk-sharpener. post-drill.
bone grinder, stone-molter. cider-mill.
and merry-go-round for the children.
I expect soon to put In machine
lathe. All of these machines are run
from n line-shaft. without moving the
engine. We often run the washing.
machine. churn, pump water. and
some OF the other machinery, all Mt
the same time with no extra trouble
or expense.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

plates more than keeping soul and
body together this farm has been
ruined. 1t will amount to nothing
until 1t has the effect of right treat
ment. and rather expensive treatment.
for series OF years. And many an
other Illinois farm has been practical
ly ruined in the same time. though
perhaps not many by the so-called
farming of one person.
The owner can never build up"
such land. The utmost he can do Is
to live. He has not even a dollar per
acre to invest in improvement. Money
for such wise investment must come
from outside the farm.
1t takes a little longer to ruin the
richer land of central Illinois. but 1t
can be done Just as certainly, as Is
shown by the 30 y5ars of continuous
corn growing on one OF the university
plots at Urbana.
Now every intelligent farmer is be-
ginning to see that without some
proper care and repair his soil will
notsmaintain itself forever. any more
than would his buildings.
Nothing more significant to Ameri.
can agriculture has ever been uttered
than the two sides of the same prop
osition persistently taught by DR..
Cyril G. Hopkins. the University of
Illinois soil expert. as follows:
ITO permanently maintain profit
able systems of agriculture Is our
most important material problem. not
only in Illinois but in the United
States.
IF We shall succeed in Illinois in
discovering and adopting into general
agricultural practice systems OF farm
ing that will restore our soils to their
virgin fertility and permanently main
tain a high productive capacity for
these Illinois lands. It will be the first
time for this to be accomplished any
where In the world over such an
area"
This Is getting down to bedrock in
agriculture. The most far-sighted and
unselfish farmers are Just beginning
to comprehend the literal meaning of
these facts and the advisability of act
ing upon them before 1t Is too late.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
CLEAR.HEADED
Head Bookkeeper Must be Reliable.

The chief bookkeeper in n large busi-
ness house in one Of our great West
ern cities speaks OF the harm coffee
did for him:
My wife and I drank our first cup
Of Postum little over two years ago.
and VIC have used 1t ever since. to the
entire exclusion OF tea and coffee. 1t
happened in this way:
About three and a half years ago
I had an Ittack Of pneumonia. which
left memento in the shape Of dyspep-
sia. or rather. to speak more correctly.
neuralgia o. the stomach. My cup Of
cheer had always been coffee or tea.
but ! became convinced, after n time.
that they aggravated my stomach trou-
BILE. happened to mention the mat
ter to my grocer one day and he sug-
gested that I give Postum a trial.
Next day 1t came. but the cook made
the mistake Of not boiling 1t sufficient
iy. and we did not like it much. This
was. however. soon remedied, and now
we like II SO much that we will never
change back. Postum. being a food
beverage instead OF a drug. has been
the means Of curing my stomach trou.
BILE. | verify believe, for I am a well
man today and have used no other
remedy.
My work as chief bookkeeper in our
Co.'S branch house here is of a very
confining nature. During my coffee.
drinking days I was subject to nerv.
ousness and the blues in addition to
my sick spells. These have left Te
conscientiously recommend 1t TO those
whose work confines them to long
hours OF severe mental exertion."
There's n Reason"
Look in pkgs. for the little book
"The Road to Wellville."
Ever read the above Ietters A new
one appears from time To time. The,
are genuine, true, Rad full Of humas
iAterest.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

The engine herewith shown is a
traction gasoline engine. the traction
part of which l made myself. 1t has
a forward speed of from five to six
miles an hour. and back speed two
thirds slower. writes W. N. Marble in
Farmers Review. The engine alone
weighs about 800 pounds and the COM
piete outfit about 500 pounds. 1t Is
only four feet wide. from one end of
axle to the other. and I can run 1t
through n gate way four feet one inch
wide, SO you see It can be kept under
perfect control. The engine is a six to
seven horsepower air cooled one. and
a fine machine.
l use 1t to run a fodder-shredder.
corn-sheller. feed-grinder. tanning mill
and circular saw. l am thinking OF
buying a small threshing machine. to
pull with II. As to how much the
traction will pull I cannot say. I am
. farmer and stock raiser. and besides
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Who Are the EIect7

Two modern statements of the doc
trine of election" neither Of which
would quite satisfy John Calvin or
Jonathan Edwards. are given in the
Congregationalist.
One was Henry Ward Beecher's cpl.
grammatic and convincing phrase:
THE elect are whosoever will: the
non-elect are whosoever won't"
Good as this Is, there is another eS.
planation that is star OF equal mag
nitude. It was made by a colorcd di.
vine. who said:
Brethren. 1t is this way: The Lord,
he is always voting for man: and the
devil. he is always voting against him.
Then the man himself votes. and that
breaks the tie!"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Put a Shirt on Greeley.

The excellent cut OF Horace Gree
leys birthplace at Amherst, N. H.. In
the Sunday Herald of recent date sug'
gests this anecdote which may be OF
interest:
The room in which he was born IL
now occupied as sitting room. A
visitor some years ago asked lady
living near by II she remembered ever
seeing Horace Greeley. and she re-
piled: well. yes: l have q very early
remembrance of him. ! put the first
shirt on him."-Boston Herald.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Good Pun on Carnegie.

A belated pun. with Andrew Carne-
gle as the victim. is being circulated
at Washington. The ironmaster was on
board a ferryboat at Norfolk on tho
day the president visited that port.
Something went wrong with the com
pass. The captain appealed TO the
mate.
The mate examined the compass and
said: 81 guess 1t must be attracted by
that steel magnate over there. Troy
Times.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Embarrassing.

Dear me, Tommy" remarked tho
young man who had been calling fis,
years. this Is a fine thick rug in front
OF the Sofa
Yes. pa gave 1t to SIS" confided
Tommy.
VERY nice OF him, I am sure
"Yes; he did 1t on your account.
though
MY account"
Il should say so. Pa said he WAS
afraid you were getting cold fest
and"
But Just then n small boy was
grabbed by blushing young lady and
locked in the basement.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
WEARING OUT
FARM QUICKLY
Rich SOIL Rem ndered Sterile
Through Continuous Bad Crop.
ping and Bad MANAGEMENT
of Fertility.
By ARTHUR 8. RILL.)

tBy ARTHUR 3. BlLL.D
Our inexhaustibly rich soil" and
many similar expressions to indicate
that the land would never become less
productive were quite common a dec
ade ago. But you seldom hear such
words now: they are passing away
with many other thoughtless conceits.
But whoever heard Of a man taking
4 piece of virgin soil and literally
wearing 1t out in his own lifetime?
A most impressive illustration of
this very thing recently came under
the writer's personal observation. a
Jew miles from Carbondale. in south
.rn Illinois.
A man now well along in his nine
ties is living upon a 120.acre farm
which he secured from the govern
nent about sixty years ago at $i.25 an
acre. The place has never been trans
erred to another person.
II was good ground and used to
produce IS bushels OF wheat per acre.
out has been farmed SO constantly to
corn and wheat without any intelli.
gent rotation or provision to return
the plant food taken OF in the crops
that now the produce OF the land bare
y enables the occupants to exist.
The last wheat crop was two bush.
els per acre. Probably less than ten
bushels Of corn per acre were raised
there this year. The land can be
counted on for little II any more than
a quarter of an average crop. Some
OF this land must lie idle every year
to rest up" for the next crop-as the
writer saw.
A nearby farmer has 40 bushels Of
corn per acre and may have above 30
bushels per acre this year. Land Is q
good price in that locality.
For any real farming that contem-
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Sizing Them Up.

Il notice all the patrons call you by
n different namc." remarked the OBJ
serving guest.
Yeas. monsieur responded tho
French waiter. "it is in zat way l tell
re tips I may expect"
"How so?"
why. IL zey shout Hey. you.' ] &c:
one nickel. II zey call me Boy I get
n dime. and II zey say 'Garcong.' with
one Parisian accent, ! get n quarter.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18


A with
a moderator
cases nvov a serio
legislation be obtained
which by meeting recently
a
IL
andg gain al the possible
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Too Much to Believe.

'I should like to be excused, your
lordship," said a man who had been
summoned on jury.
What for?"
81 owe man five pounds. and
want to hunt him up and pay it,
DO you mean to tell this court you
would hunt up man to pay bill in
stead of waiting for him TO hunt you
up?"
"Yes. your lordship."
You are excused. I don't want any
one on the jury who will lie like that"
-Cassell's Journal.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
CARTER FOR POSTAL BANKS

Few big measures Of any Importance have
been discussed in the United States senate in the
last few years that Thomas II. Carter. senator
from Montana. has not had something to do with.
Mr.. Carter is indefatigable worker and thor
ough in all he does. When he was national COM
missioner of the Louisiana Purchase exposition
at st. Louis he was always hand to that
the interests OF the government well
guarded. The Montana senator took prominent
part in the debate on the tariff bill and now he
is behind q measure which President Taft wants
passed.
1t is the postal savings bank bill that has the
attention OF Senator Carter Just now. The Repub-
lican pla torn called for such a law. Taft says
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
3rATE or ONO CIT or TOLEDO. GO
LUCAS COUNTY, ~


Lucas COUNTY. M.
FRANK J. CHENEY makes oath that he s senior
partner OF the firm OF F. j. CHENEY Co. doing
business In the City Of Toledo. County and State
lforesad and that said 1rm viii pay the sum Of
rasr OF CATARRM that cannot DO cured by the Of
HALLS CATARgH CURE. - : ..
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before and subscribed In my presence.
this eth day Of December. A. D.. 1886.
49,, 4. ". GLEASON.
/ SEAL NOTARY PUBLIC.
Halls Catsrrh Cure Is taken internally and acts
directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces OF tho
System. send for testimonials. FREE
=. J. CHENEY & CO.. Toledo. o.
Sold by all Druggists. fSc.
Take Halls Family I'is for constipation.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

This illustration gives an excellent
idea Of an ingenious arrangement Of a
circular saw and gasoline engine to
be used for cutting down tres. All
the units of the plant are assembled
IN an ordinary farm wagon. the saw
being arranged on a mast which
swings from the back end Of the vehi.
fcle. says Popular Mech.nics. The gaso-
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18


is
his he II ady
In
mportuned him
inaugural Then he to bed leaving
orders tina he disturbed for day.
of
he selling Album
never efusedh
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Of
is rumor
cides
Asquth
As a
portfolio
of
andth
for rrecrea
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

David Brewer. associate Justice OF the su
preme court of the United States, says criticism
of courts. their delays. and cost OF litigation
just In recent interview he favored the
granting of but appeal after trial. Justice
Brewer declared an implicit faith in the capa-
biity Of the American people to maintain and
perpetuate the republican form of government.
"The courts. their delays and the cost Of liti
CATION justly criticised" said the venerable
jurist. mo judge ought to object to any fair
criticism and no honest judge will object. There
is no duty more imperative upon the bar and the
bench than to do what they to simplify mat
tiers and put techncalities out OF the way and
to it that substantial Justice is administered
my 6nipiau
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
SHERMAN RAPS WATERWAY

Everybody in Illinois knows that Lawrence Y.
Sherman. former lieutenant governor and now
president of the Illinois state board OF administra-
ton. is plain talker. Mr.. Sherman usually says
what he thinks and does not fear to express his
opinions freely. but his closest friends we're
prised at the speech he made before the Automo-
bile Club of America in New York several days
ago.
In that speech Mr.. Sherman attacked a pet
measure OF his chief. Gov. Deneen. The governor
wants to spend s2O.o8OOOO on the states water.
ways MIR. Sherman knows 1t. but he didn't hest
tate to say that the money could be put to better
use II applied to the building of hard roads. or
course this kind of talk pleased the automobile
people, for good roads is the hobby of all who
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
ASoUITH SNUBS THE KING

Premier Asquith. who has left London for a
vacation on the continent. may relinquish the
premiership when the new government is formed.
He will decide this question during his trip. He
declared before the elections he would not con-
tinue in Office unless the country gave him full
authority to carry his policy In dealing with
the house of lords.
II can hardly be said that the result OF the
elections contains any such mandate. 1t Is
practically settled the liberals will not have n
clear majority in the house Of commons and the
coalition with the nationalists and Iaborites will
not have sufficient authority TO inaugurate any
radical constitutional changes.
1t is open secret that Mr.. Asquith has
found the practical dictatorship Of the socalistic
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

If you would know Just what people
say of you behind your back, listen to
what they say of others.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Many a man does more kicking with
his tongue than a mule does with mis-
hind feet.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Some girls wear their hearts on
their sleeves. and others are heartless.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Fraud on the Face Of It.

Medium.-The spirit of your wife
craves to speak to you.
MANICURE rank fraud; my wife
would never ask permission to speak
to me.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

line engine belt is connected to
horizontal shaft. which in turn Is con.
nected to a perpendicular one. A belt
leading from the perpendicular shaft
whirls the saw. which can be raised
or lowered to satisfy the requirements
Of height. As shown In the illustra-
ton, the saw can be made to cut very
close to the ground. which Is a dis
tinct advantage.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

A missing suspender button often
leaves q man In suspense.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Two hearts that beat as one seldom
keep time. very long.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18
Natural Consequence.

How was 1t he came to grief?"
by being a joy rider
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Even real estate men occasionally
build castles in the air.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

A lame excuse is merely one tina
doesn't go.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

Even the man who admits that no
caught only one fish may lie about its
weight.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

in
Springfield
plan which Mr.
greatly
speech
mile he expressed his preference
good roads
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1910-02-18

c. B. FIAER, Mt. Sterling, KY, says:
bladder frouble Tor Ten wears nask
Peruna and continued for three months.
have not used it since, nor have felt
pain"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1910-04-02
Andy's April Fool Surprise

frock to wear on the morrow. came run
ming to the hall door to see what the joke
was
ITS some KID declared Andy. "and
he's hidden somewhere nearby. But he
may watch i'm vain to catch me pick up
that purse. 1t may stay there till TO-
morrow before touch It,"
"Oh, that's unfair to the kid" said
Sissy. Il say, let one OF US pick up the
pocketbook just to give him his sport.
It's terribly disappointing to lay plan
to catch some one on April FOOLS day, ana
have It prove a failure. Let one OF US
pick up the pocketbook and give the
joker his fun
mot me-" persisted Andy. 'I'll not fall
SO easy. II you girls want to do f-go
ahead. And when some kid from behind
the hedge yells out April fool: don't get
mad
'Not a bit of It," laughed Sissy. Come
on. Mary, let's pick it up together. What
do you say?"
IAN right, Sissy, I'll help to give the
Joker his triumph" consented Mary. So
together they opened the door and stoop-
ed down. their right hands grasping the
big poketbook together. They held IT a
moment, expecting to hear voice from
some hidden spot calling out April FOO!
But not a vocal sound disturbed the quiet
around them. They were somewhat sur
prised at the result of their picking up
the book and decided to look inside OF
il. They returned to the parlor, where
ANDY still remained, and there opened
the mysterious pocketbook. To the sur
prise Of all, they beheld a great fold OF
bills-amounting to $500. And around the
bills was wrapped a paper on which these
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1910-04-02
A FAIRY AND A CAKE

are not to blame for the action OF the
dough. l arm responsible for it,
Andeva turned about to see a fairy
standing beside her. She was SO much
astonished that she could not speak for
a minute and stood staring at the beauti-
full creature beside her
II know how unhappy you are, little
Andeva.' said the fairy. and I have
come to take you to happy home. where
other children will welcome you. And
this cake dough, which, you will observe,
Is turning very hard. will lift its way
through the roof OF this stone kitchen,
and by 1t we will ascend to the clouds.
From there our way il safe-once out Of
reach of this castle"
'Oh, good fairy! Are you speaking
truly. or ain l but dreaming?" cried lit
tia Andeva-
THE moment is real and not q dream -
raid the fairy. '.And now we will ascend
10 the roof, and from there to the clouds.
and then we will 60 on and on till we
reach a land far from here, and there you
will md q happy home"
As the fairy said this she took Andeva's
hand. and together they climbed to the
roof Of the stone kitchen by the great
pile OF dough, which had turned to sub