The Washington times., 1910-10-08
TOO FEW PUMPKINS;
TOO MANY PIKERS
Chief Exhibit at Marlboro Fair is Unique Collection of
Persons With Much Inside Information, But Lit
tie Real Money to Bet.

Gimme one"
The ticket agent passed out round
trip ticket to Upper Marlboro and raked
in a dollar.
Gimme two" ordered the next in
line, peelinE a two-dollsr h,ii aet roll
OF currency.
The ticket agent showed oIt two r nd
trip tickets to Upper Marlboro.
The third man in line. whu bad
watched the brevity which Character
lied the business transactions Of tho
men ahead of him, came to the conclu-
sion that the Pennsylvania sad put 4
mind reader in charge OF the ticket Of
fee.
Give me one, please" he said, as he
stepped up 10 the window ana passed a
dollar in.
Where TO. please?' asked the ticket
agent. as he looked the purchaser over
You did not have 10 ask the other
two men shat question" remarked the
passenger.
Didn't have to-" answered the
ticket agent. Look them over. and
remember that the ponies are running
at Upper Marlboro
The third man bought his ticket for
Baltimore, and then walked out TO
the train shed TO get a look at the
two men who found il unnecessary 70
announce their destination when pur-
chasing q railroad ticket
Some Clothes.
one Of them was clad in a black
and-white suit, with three-inch cuffs
at the bottom Of his trousers, an au-
r. q II
Jersey sweater with a monstrOus piece
of glass in the shape Of a horseshoe
stuck where a tie should have been
knotted.
The other man had on a checker
board suit. cloth-top patent iesther
shoes, a golden horse stuck in red
necktie, a light gray derby hat, and
carried a big bamboo cane IN the
crook Of his right arm,
These two were a part Of the upper
crust of the racetrack follower5-who
make IL their business TO look pros
porous rega rdless Of whether lhelr
financial resources warrant It Incl
dentally they are eXiles- Listen ID
Amt this hard luck never goiu' tub
curl up and qUit2
.'WbaS a thought Ia be pikin' away
down here al this half-Daked village
irwin tub make enough 10 keep lle
bell hops lookin' agreeable when l ask
for ice water in the mornin' ana tlh
keep the hotel manager from throwing
me out. An just SOS TO rub IL In that
Hughes guy comes 20 town 70 De
Judge after he put US on the bum In
New Yoik II 1 cOu'd only beat these
iav-hawks out OF twelve hundred bones
I'd hop a train for New Yoik, pay me
detts and feel decent again We Eel
lers gotta elect that guy Hopper gov ner
O. New YoIk, then we'd have the good
old days back again.
Some Fair.
They make laws against us in New
Yoik Say. II we ever pulled OF any
thing so raw up home as these guys
are puIlin' of down here the reformers
would howl their bloomin' heads OF.
This IS an agricultural fair, amt IT.
Twas all framed up for the farmers OF
Southern Maryland. wasn't IL They was
supposed TO come to the fair grounds 10
see things thatd teach 'em things.
wasn't they? They get the ponies here
as Just part Of the fair, didn't they
They're gettln all those things, ain'I
they-2 Not. Have yuh piped the eX-
hibition2 On the level, it's a scream
Il got down TO the track early yes
tcrday 10 look al the BOYS take the
ponies out for mornin' exercise. and
when that was over I looked ,Ec place
over. Say. If yuh want tSh lie latin
Just 70 round and look az the agTicul-
turaI exhibits. Maybe 7 didn't have so
much trouble as some folks cause I had
me field glasses with me. But even
then : nearly strained me eyes. Re
member hat this Is an agricultural fair