davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Getting nj the Facts.

From the YonkcTs Statesman.
Patience hear you're engaged TO be
married
Patrice-Where in the world did you
hear that2
MY maid told me"
How did she hear to-
"A policeman told her"
More mystery. How came a policeman
10 know it2"
"Why the man you're engaged 10 told
him when the officer was taking him
home"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Rather Personal.

IRON the Chicago News
TalIman-Dnly a fool makes the. same
sort Of mistake THE second time.
Shortman-Do you mean to insinuate
mat / am a fool?
Tallman-Certainly not
Shortman-Wel I didn't know. I've
been married twice.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
The Head Rest.

From the New York Tribune.
a young lawyer offered cigar "a
Henry f. Dixey at a New Years supper
It's easy 10 see, said Mr.. DiXey, eX-
aiming the cigar. that you are not
married, but only engaged"
Il am engaged. But how did YOU
know? ITS a secret" cried the lawyer.
Il knew" said Mr. Dixey, because
you have frequently offered me a ciga1
from your vest pocket, and ii has always
been broken"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
ALITTLE NONSENSE.
SAVING TIME.

On entering a crowded store
That many shoppers haunt.
Make ii your plan
To tell the man
Exactly what you want.
He then can sell you something else
Without a long delay.
IL helps a clerk
About his work
To start him of this way.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Poetry and Prose.

From the Boston Trau~-lpt.
She-Aprll. beautiful April! l wish It
would last forever.
He-So do l.
He-Not especially, but I have a note
coming due the first OF May
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Too Much ImpreHNed.

From tho Atlanta Constitution.
throat specialist in Bethany, accord
ing to the Clipper. used a Iaryngoscope on
nervous woman patient, and remarked
You would be surprised TO know how
far we can see with this instrument "
AS he was about to place the instrument
in her throat she apologized for hole
I'm her stocking
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Roosevelt stood silent before the tomb
Of Napoleon notes the New York
American. Well. perhaps a good many
other folks would. if what they might
have TO say were worth 81 per word in
real money.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

The enthusiasm in favor of Gov.
Hughes for the Supreme Court of the
United States is not altogether confined
to his friends: A large number OF crooks.
political and otherwise, in New York
State positively are praying that he may
be promoted
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

"A Michigan man has just obtained
his fifth wife through a matrimonial
agency" says the Milwaukee Sentinel
That matrimonial agency must work
hand in hand with separation agency.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

"The Republican party never was in
healthier condition than now AYERS the
New York Tribune. II is showing an
unusual disposition 10 throw of some
OF its major ailments, sure enough.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

The idea Of retiring Mr.. Roosevelt
on pension would receive the enthusi-
astic sanction of some statesmen, no
matter how large the pension, II only
il might be guaranteed that Mr.. Roose-
welt would accept il and retire
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Mr. Bryan wishes Congress TO provide
for the elimination Of ;he .iookWoyn in
Porto Rico. 1t is but just TO say. how
ever. that Mr.. Bryan does no; advance
the suggestion paramount-lssuely.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

The real truth of the matter is. the
Democratic party at this stage OF the
game is merely inclined strenuously 10
hope that the country will give it the
benefit Of the doubt next fall
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

In little more than three years Gov.
Patterson, Of Tennessee, has pardoned 96j
criminals, including 152 murderers. There
are few left in the pententiary. OF
course. but the governor stiT has several
months 10 serve.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

The Rochester Union and Advertiser
seems somewhat surprised to leara that
the late IL n. Rogers left only $3S. 000,-
600" II is a sure thing, however that
he did not carry anything away with HIM.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Civic Pride.

1T is considered patriotic TO go home
TO vote"
quite so; but / know man who came
all the way from Europe 20 help swell
our towns census total
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

the Ohio State Journal. Mystery? Why.
there never has been a day since the
year 1 that something just as good was
not available for courtship purposes.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

worth of presents she did not need. How
ever, the people who made and sold the
presents may have needed the money
paid for them.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
The Inference.

From the Boston Transcript.
Heck-In my view. the partnership or
marriage Is precisely like a partnership
In business.
Peck-Youre away cn, In business
man sometimes gets silent partner; IN
marriage. never
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
soon In Demand.

I guess that young doctor will pick up
some biz right at the start"
why so?"
Hes advertising himself as a green
apple specialist"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
.Inhn Ms Mnnrr.

From the ST. Louis PoSt.Dsuatch
n Rockefeller would convert his foundation money
into a ship subsidy fund he would confer a favor
on Congress and slrc the people a rest.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Violent Imnnct.

What would happen should an ire
sistible force meet an immovable body?'
1T would be about like a suffragettt
colliding with a d. A. r."
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

The Democratic donkey heaves a sigh
Of relief every tins 1t remembers that it
cannot remember what Mr. Bryan said
when he first got off the boat
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Gets the Habit.

"A baseball player who seeks the stage
seldom goes back TO the diamond"
That's because there Is no way OF
handling the sun as a spot light"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Sound Advice.

From the Arkansas Gazette.
What shah we do with Roosevelt ,he CUES
ton now. Don't do anything until you ask Rooee-
velt
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Uncle Joe" should have a look-ln on
one Of those D. A. r. meetings. It might
be entertaining to watch some frst-class
insurging from the standpoint Of an
innocent bystander.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

A contemporary recalls that MI Roose-
Welt let the tariff severely alone" Well,
from one point OF view. that seems a
pretty safe and sane thing 70 do
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Swapping symptoms.

You can't be prominent socially these
days unless you have an ailment TO dis
cusS"
Yes; l frequently attend an afternoon
clinic"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
PEOPLE AND THINGS.


Prudery.
The 1910 shapely bathing girls So
journing at Atlantic City may rest as
sured they will no longer be bothered by
rivalry in the form Of the artistic sand
statuary. an attraction which has In the
past been the means OF livelihood Of GER
tain aspiring sculptors. Here is a crumb
Of comfort; and. yet. it is 10 be imme-
diately snatched away. for the very law
which places nude sand statues of any
sort under the ban makes the mayor Of
the city judge in the matter Of bathing
costumes. officials behind the new law
claim that II was made necessary by the
fact that the sand artists frequently went
20 too great lengths of immodesty in
their sculptures in order TO attract at
tention and a few pennies From now on
every worker in sand must submit either
drawings or models Of his proposed work
before he will be granted license. Mayor
Stoy declares that he viii insist upon the
most modest Of statuary. or refuse to
grant any permits at all.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Society Drama.

/ love the fashion-plated play
Where six or seven hams
Infest the stage in lordly way,
Emitting epigrams.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Perhaps.

From the Roston Transcript.
The 5000 memorial to the late Speaker Reed viii
be unveiled al Portland in August Perhaps Dan
Vile viii do as much for Cannon some day.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Generally Has that Eject

From the Boston Transcript
Shell wonder why Methuselah lived to
sVch a great old age?"
He-Perhaps some young woman mar
ried him for his money"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

a Cincinnati man committed suicide just
as the census man rang the front door
bell Perhaps the most amazing lack Of
local pride on record.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Inside Information.

From the Philadelphia North American.
Senator Bacon made speech the cost Of hv-
ing Now. # Congressman Ham would give his
testimony. the case would he complete.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

What's this? Paris papers poking fun
at the colonel? Ha. Gadzoo1s, He may
abolish bunch Of those Paris papers
If they are not careful!
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

'The south pole Is continually NOV
-ing. says Sir Ernest Shackleton. The
man who discovers that thing may need
a laSso.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Dodging Taxes and Ta1is.

From the southern Lumbeman.
In these sNiftmoying times there is not 20 much
difference between men after al-the nch man
lodges taxes and the poor man lodges taxis
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
Tho EnattainabIe.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger.
Rhode Island is casting about for man q the
Adrch type. As though little State could con
tain a pair
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

From the Tombstone tArizl Ertarh-
Two Prescott bandits distinguished
themselves by going into ID restaurant.
robbing ii. and getting out without tipping
single waiter.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

"Jens wind Is improving" says a
sporting item. Hope this does not mean
the big fellow is to increase his talk
output
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Discussing great waterways. Michael r.
Neese. Of Chicago. H.. who is at TIE Ar
lington. said that the United states gov
eminent can well afford TO conside- the
question Of constructing a deep water
way from the gulf To the Great Lakes
for the national defense IS destined 90
require il as much as national commerce
demands IL
Canada " said Mr.. Neese. sis ersa-rE
in building system of canals. the COM
pletion Of which will permit the ErS,tS-
navy 10 send its fleet into the Great
Lakes itself. For MANY wears there has
bae, a treaty between the United States
and Great Britain providing that there
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

1t is hard to believe that little old Rhode
Island may have another Aldrich some
where concealed about it's person.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

BE gentle wiA the census man; refrain
from getting funny ~ does the very
best he can-he merely needs the money
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

a bipaue fell on an automobile down
in Memphis recently" Oh. gentle reader,
please excuse our ill-cOncealed miTth,
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Some people insist that one OF the most
enjoyable moments Of an evening OF nice
laxative, neighborhood whist is that point
where beautiful woman. clad in cheer
fulness trumps her partners ace and
then remarks that she did not mean 20
do II. But not always so. Oh dear. no,
A Kansas City woman was engaged in a
game Of whist, her partner being her hus-
bands friend. He threw an ace. and she
trumped it. and he cursed. What do you
think her husband did? He sat right
there, and didn't event resent il. The
lady very promptly sued him for divorce
and Il was granted her II seems 70 US
that the lady's partner should simply
have bubbled into laughter instead Of
getting up in the air over the matter.
and then all the trouble would have been
prevented. II may be laid down as a safe
rule Of the game never TO get sore at
the lady who trumps your ace. She sim
ply performs her normal function in
neighborhood whist in a case like this.
! and-well, you are a gentleman.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

MAKE Houston clean. says the Hous-
ton Post. What? Heavenly Houston?'
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
A Sop.

My hens refuse TO lay"
Put Votes for women placard in the
henhOuse"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
AT THE HOTELS.


There IS no man who is more on
posed 10 socialism than Theodore Roose-
welt and 20 ask him TO preside al a social
istic meeting would be tantamount to
challenging him to a mortal duel" said
Herman Z. Brinker, Of Chicago. IN.
who was seen at the Raleigh yesterday.
Mr.. Roosevelt impersonates central
lied government, a government bv the
strong willcd and strong in physique ana
IL is due 20 this very man, Roosevelt.
that socialism has made such tremendous
gains in the United States in the last
few years. ROosevelts attacks on the
trusts. combines, and interests every
where; his use OF unconventional terms
in branding them with his disapproyaI
resulted IN the muckraker whose articles
appeared everywhere and had the ten
dency TO disgust the people with existing
things. The people argued that If such
conditions could exist. the government
which would permit their existence must
be equally corrupt. Therefore the peo-
pie argued that centralized power as
| represented by Roosevelt was not the
thing for the country; that the principles
1 OF socialism and their practical execu-
I ton would be the salvation Of the Unlled
States. The people listened to Roosevelt
only too well They learned the lesson
and the result is a growing tendency in
/ favor of-not the Republican party or
! the Democratic party. the prohibition
| party, or any other of the big parties
/ but Of the socialistic party"
The election I'm Milwaukee has shown
which way the wind is blowing. La Fol
/ lette is also one Of the men whose doc
| trines and preachments are helping social
| ism. The election Of Democrats 90 Con-
gress TO take the place Of Republicans in
various districts is an indication Of the
/ dissatisfaction Of the people wiki existing
! things. The Democratic party differs but
/ little from the Republican party. and
soon the people viii cut their affiliations
with both Of these two old organizations
and join the Socialists.
Il make the prediction that the coming
/ election in Chicago viii be a sociaIistic
triumph and after once Chicago is IN
/ the possession Of that party other cities
and towns VIII follow In quick success
sion"
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Another mystery is how so many
young felix's contrived to get engaged be-
fore the porch swing was invented" says
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Potatoes are getting cheaper every day
This means more soup
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

4 Connecticut man complains Of rheuma-
tism in his wooden leg. a dry kiln is
the only thing we can think of suggest
ing.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Stick to your old gray flannels for a
week or so yet, nevertheless.
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24
CHAT OF THE FORUM.
Mhnt a Prnhicnmcnt,

I FI0m ne Houston IV5I-
Heavens, VIII there be no Republican in the next
House o. Representative for Us 20 shy a brick a.!
The Washington herald., 1910-04-24

Richard Buchert. Of Berlin a mining
engineer Of that city. who has recently
returned from German Southwest Africa.
and is at the New Willard. said that
the diamond fields near Luderitzbucht in
that country have a great future. The
local taxation levied on the gross diamond
output amounts to no less than 53lz per
/ cent ad valorem. but this in itself is little
compared with the absUrdIv low cost ~
/ production. which pans out al about IS.
/ Cd per karat The Kolmans Kop Com
Ipany,' continued Mr. Buchert. which is
I the only company working with English
capital subscribed in Cape Colony. have
as vet produced few diamonds, compare
lively speaking. and have placed fewer
stHl on the market. but they have been
able 70 declare a 10 per cent dividend for
/ the first three months working and 10
is anticipated that ar the expiration Of the
! next three months the directors viii de-
/ clare a further dividend OF - per cent.
/ Recently ] rode ont with the manager
I Of this mine, and saw parcel Of dla-
I mOnds weighed. representing three and q
, half DAYS work with a mere handful Of
/ Ovambo boys The parcel scaled lis
/ karats. So far the stones found have all
. been small. running from three 90 six
per karat. but further south diamonds ~
/ five karats and over have lately been
I discovered In the direction OF the sup
/ posed parent mine.
/ "LUderitzbucht provides a fine study in
| contrasts. Il has the most modern teIe-
/ phone system and no sanitation Water
is dearer in proportion than bread. With
nothing that makes life worth living save
money making. there is little else 20 do
but 20 gamble and drink. In LuderitzbUcht
Tho blacks do not joste tile whites. as ir
British colonies. but though segregated.
there is a cosmopolitan croWd-Oyaubos.
/ Hereros. Hottentots. Cape boys KaHrs.
ZulUs. all with their distinctive traits
And the cattle are nearly as varied a. the
natives. from the Egyptian camel % the
/ Argentine mule out from L-d,r-tzbucht
the railway ribbons into Eeetmanshoor.
From Svakopmund. higher u7 tire coast.
the railway runs inland % W--dhUk. and
|it is hoped that the near f--u-e viii see
the TWO inland teru.ui linked together
and country opened up thereby Bgt the
cost OF maintaining the line between
Luderitzbucht and Heetmanshoop has
proved enormous. Water has 20 be car
ried In trucks. Native men and women
are employed continually in keeping the
sand of the l'L-. which. but for their
IiuCessant shoveling. would disappear as
efectuaIly as If dropped in mlIocean
II is mon than likely that the imperial
and colonial German government vii
link up with the Cape Colony railroad in
the near future
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1910-07-30
AEROPLANE BATTLE
WITH SEA G|RT
TROOPS PLANNED
[special to the Newark star.l

N4
ASBURY PARK, July 30.-In the ten
days aviation meet, beginning August
10, chief of the special programs is thai
set for August IL, when there will be a
sham battle between the companies
from the military encampment at Sea
Girt and the aerial n~avigators, demon
strating the feasibility of the lighter
than-air machines as an aid in time Of
war.
On his occasion Governor Fort, of
New Jersey; Governor Stuart, of Penn
sylvania, n Governor Hughes, of New
York, will be the guests of honor. With
their military stats and the cavalry
assigned to act as guards a picturesque
touch Of the military will be added to
the other sights. Upon this occasion it
is not improbable that President Taft
will lend his presence, as he has prom
ised to be at Sea Girt, where the SOL
diers are encamped, at about this time.
Plans are developing for Asbury
Parks baby carnival, which will begin
August 80 with the coronation of the
carnival queen, and end September 2
with the far-famed baby parade.
Miss Helen Boswell, of West Phila-
delphia, vas the heroine Of q sensa-
tional rescue early in the week, when
she plunged. fully clothed, into the
water to aid Robert Eigenauch and
Howard H. Hook, of Pittsburg, whose
canoe had upset, leaving them in deep
water, and partly buried in the muddy
bottom Of the lake, from which they
were unable to extricate themselves.
Miss Boswell, who is an expert swim
mer, got both young men safely to
shore.
The membership of the Asbury Fish
ing I'll was given another boost dur
ing the week, when the 800 mark was
reached by the election OF nineteen
new members, including Congressman
J. j. Fitzgerald and Richard Gledhill,
Eugene T Warford, H. X. Satow. E.
McKelvey, DR.. William D. Knecht and
DR.. John a.. Gaynor.
Newarkers at the Edgemere include
l.. Horn, Edward Horn and Morris
Horn.
0. w. Kleppe and family, Of Mont
clair, arrived this week and have taken
apartments at the Annesley for the
balance of the summer.
Miss Dorothy NJ. Keller, A. Rowland
and w. NJ. Keepers have Joined the
colony of N~ewarkers at the Lafayette.
The Plainfield contingent al the Man-
haitian includes Mrs. F. T. Dickinson,
Miss Florence S. Dickinson, Miss Helen
Carson and F. It. Dickinson.
From Caldwell, at the same hotel, are
Mr.. and Mrs. II. e. Schanz, Miss b.
Schanz, Miss Harriet Schanz and w.
Schanz.
Patrons of the Fifth Avenue House
include Mrs. Charles A. Schenck and
family, of New Brunswick; E. d. SMITH
and Mr.. and Mrs. Charles T. Hammer
Of Elizabeth, and Mr.. and Mrs. Thomas
Davis, of East Orange.
Spending some time at the Brunswick
are DIR. J. Olin, William Talbot and DR.
E. Chaser, Of Newark; w. f. STEELE. o.
Plainfeld; Mr.. inc Mrs. A. Reid, OF
Bayonne; L. Rhoades and o. Rhoades
of East Orange; mr.. and Mrs. e. Kiel
of Hoboken: DIR. S.. NJ. Human, OF
Crawford: A. r. Roberts and ]. Nc
Dermott, of Elizabeth.
Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1910-07-30
KILLARNEY UNSURPASSED,
DECLARES NE WARE PASTOR
Rev. Henry R. Rose Sings Praises of Irelands Scenery and
Places 1t First in Natures Beauty-Tels of Finest Way
to See Picturesque RegiOn-Irish Wit Strikingly
Represented by Native Guides.

fallen Island, the Tore Waterfall and
the Meeting of the Waters near the
old Weir Bridge are some of the places
of alluring interest.
Then when o leave Killarney be
sure and do it in the motor car that
runs to G~lengariff and Bantry Bay,
for you climb, climb, climb 1,400 feet
through scenery that beggars descrip-
ton, until far, far below you on the
one hand stretches the Gap of Dunloe
and on the other hand the smiling
lakes of Killarney. The ride is quick
ening. Onward you speed over smooth
roads, past peat beds where the coal
of Ireland Is cut out of sod, little stone
houses where the peasants make their
neat and humble homes; waving fields
of grass and towering patches of pota-
toes-the principal crop of Ireland
and little villages until you near Glen
gariff, when you are once more in the
midst of wild and wonderful cenery
Soon Bantry Bay-an arm of the At
lantic-lies below you glistening in the
summer sunlight like a great diamond.
1t is all glorious, especially as the air
Is freighted with the aroma of new
mown hay from the fields nearby,
mixed with the ozone from old pecan.
From Bantry we took the train to
Cork. 1t runs through an agricultural
region which reminds one of New Eng
land at it's best. There is another
route from Macroom to Cork, and it,
too, carries you through country that
amazes you with its fertility and
grandeur. OF course, in the south of
Ireland you begin to see the poverty
of the people more than farther north,
and yet there Is no such poverty today
as there was ven five years ago. To-
day the farmer can own his own farm
II he wants to. England has passed a
law which compels the landlord to sell
the tenant the farm on instruments.
A farmer, by simply paying rent, say
for twenty years, comes by hat fact
to own his farm at the end of the
time. This is encouraging the people,
and they are a thousand times happier
and more progressive thar they ever
were. 1t used to be the rule for the
landlord TO raise the rent every time
the tenant made any Improvement on
his farm or made 1t more productive.
This, of course, discouraged industry,
progress and thrift. But today the
peasant gains by every Improvement
he makes. He has hope and something
to look forward to. Hence he is prov
ing that there is stuff in him out of
which prosperous and progressive man
hood is made. Ireland needs more men
and women, and I imagine II will keep
more of its population from immigrat-
ing, now that conditions are becoming
SO much more inviting n satisfac-
tory. I saw no evicted families, and
there need be none any more unless
the man is too lazy to work or too
Incorporate to pay his bills.