davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
TRIED 1T ON DAD.
Botanist of the Family Treats the Old
Man on Discovery


Man on a Discovery.
A prominent Yale professor is ex-
ceptiOnally fond of mushrooms. His
son, who is an enthusiastic botanist,
one day brought some home and told
his mother to have them prepared as
a special treat for his father When
the professor came in to dinner he was
delighted to find his favorite dish at
his place.
These are not all for me, are they"
he asked, not wishing to be selfish.
Eyes. father; I gathered them spe-
cially for you" answered the dutifuI
son.
Next morning his son was awaiting
him with rather an anxious expression
on his face. Good morning, dad" he
ventured. Did you sleep all right last
night?"
Fine" was the encouraging reply.
Not sick at all, or didn't have any
pain?"
why, of course not" answered the
professor.
''Hoorah" said the bOtanist 81 have
discovered another species that is not
poisonous" success Magazine.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
A Gold Road.

At Oroville, in Butte county. Cal. a
section of roadway has been found so
rich in placer gold that an application
has been made for permission to
dredge 1t. The miner who makes the
application to the authorities agrees,
according to newspaper reports, to re
place the road by one fully as good as
or better than the present one. 1t would
seem, however, that if the city owns a
gold mine 1t would pay better to work
it and get the money for the city treas
ury. Not many cities in the country
can boast Of paying gold deposits in
the public streets. and there is proba-
bly, dearth of precedents to guide
the city council in its action.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

the atmosphere with the handsomest
smell of ham and eggs that ever laid
the honeysuckle in the shade. When
it got too dark to make out Buckles
nonsense and the notes in the In
structor me and Mack would light our
pipes and talk.
One evening Mack spoke up and
asked me if l was much apprised in
the habits and policies of women folks.
why, yes says | in a tone Of
voice. Il know 'em from Alfred to
Omaha The feminine nature and 81
Multitude" says l. lis as plain to my
sight as the Rocky mountains is to a
blue eyed burro. Pm on to all their
little sidesteps and punctual discrep-
ancies.'
Il tell you, Andy" says Mack,
with kind of sigh. Il never had the
least amount of intersection with their
predispositions. Maybe l might have
had a prOneness in respect to their vi
cinity, but | never took the time.
made my own living since | was four
teen, and / never seemed to get my
ratiocinations equipped with the senti-
ments usually depicted toward the
sect l sometimes wish had" says
old Mack
They're an adverse study" says I,
land adapted to points of view. AL
though they vary in rationale, l have
found 'em quite often obviously differ
ing from each other in divergences of
contrast
at seems to me-" goes on Mack,
that a man had better take 'em in
and secure his inspirations of the sect
when he's young and so preordained.
l let my chance go by. and guess I'm
too old now to go hopping into the
curriculum"
"Oh, | don't know" l tells him.
maybe you better credit yourself with
q barrel of money and a lot of ernan-
cipation from a quantity of uncontent.
Still. don't regret my knowledge of
'em," | says. ut takes a man who un-
derstands the symptoms and byplays
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
Automobiles to Haul Road prans

At Salina. Kan, an effort is being
made to induce each automObolist to
drag several miles of road after each
rain. The theory is that the use of the
drag places the earth on the crown of
the road, where it dries and hardens.
After another rain a repetition of the
dragging carries on more earth, which
in turn hardens, and after a few such
applications of the drag there is con-
siderable hardened surface to the road
which does not easily disintegrate. The
employment Of the motor car to haul
the drag you'd demonstrate a hitherto
unemployed utility Of the machine.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

Of women folks to take care of himself
in this world"
We stayed on in Pima because we
liked the place. Some folks might en-
joy their money with noise and rap
ture and locomotion. but me and Mack
we had had plenty of turmoils and
hotel towels. The people were friend
ly: All Sing got the swing of the grub
we liked; Mack and Buckle We're as
thick as two body snatchers. and l
was hitting out a cordial resemblance
to Buffalo Gals. Can't You Come Out
Tonight" on the banjo.
One day | got a telegram from
Speight, the man that was working a
mine l had an interest in out in New
Mexico. | had to so out there. and l
was gone two months.
When l struck the cabin | nearly
tainted. Mack was standing in the
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

the only one in town that can perform
the dispensations of marriage. | prom
ised Eddie and Rebosa a month ago
I'd marry 'em. He's Il busy lad, and
he'll have a groceIi Ct his own some
day"
"He WILL says |.
"There was lots of women at the
wedding" says Mack, smoking up
But I didn't seem to get any ideas
from 'em. | wish | was informed in
the structure of their attainments like
you said you was
'That was two months ago. says 1,
reaching up for the banjo
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
The CowardIy Eco,

when l arose to speak," related a
martyred statesman. some one hurled
a base, cowardly egg at me, and it
struck me on the chest
And what kind Of an egg might
that be-" asked a fresh young man.
A base, cowardly egg" explained
the statesman, lis one that hits you
and then runs. Everybody's.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
Atlantic CITY Next Year.

The next annual meeting of the ma
tional grange will be held at Atlantic
City, n. ]. Invitations were received
from New York and Washington states.
Atlantic City winning out over Wash
ington by a small plurality. The re-
election of National Master Bachelor
was never in doubt. the opposition to
him being merely nominal.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
JACKIE Lantern

Johnny-The medicine amt so nasty
as it usetir be, mommer. I'm gettin
used to it,
Mommer-Do you take whole
spoonful every hour?
Johnny-No'm. l couldn't find a
spoon, so I'm usin' a fOrk.-Cleveland
Leader
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
As Usual.

In vain they told the heiress that the
duke was an impostor and worse.
Why" said a friend. Il have read
there is a price upon his head" But
the heiress, all serene, only answered,
Il have the price"'-Young's Maya
zine
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
Gems of lndexino.

The following are to be found in the
catalogue of the Squantum Corners
Public library:
Bacon; Its Preparation.
on Inductive Reasoning.
Lead Poisoning.
Kindly Light.
0 lark 7 aDtarp
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

First LabOrer-How do you like them
college boys yell?
Second DittO-I got locked an hour
yesterday taking it for the quit whis,
tle.-Punch Bowl.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

Any questions that any reader may
like to ask about the grange move
ment may be addressed to the name at
the head OF this department
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
unidentihed

Officer-Whose little boy was it jist
fell off the wharf?
Tommy-Dunno. When they fished
him out he wuz so clean day couldn't
identify him.-Spokane Spokesman
Review
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

Alaska gave us S19,OOO,OOO worth of
gold in 1905 But what of it when
New York gave $23,OOO,OO0 worth of
potatoes and Vermont $1S,O00,0O0 worth
of hay!
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
Where They Land.

"Pa, what is a libretto?'
"a hbretto. Aurelius, is a home for
old jokes. Detroit Saturday Night.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09
The Week In London,

"Is Lady Jane inT'
every sorry, sir, but mistress Is In
prison this afternoon" Life.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1910-06-09

Members Get Quotations From the Ex-
change and Keep Prices and Arrange
ments to Themselves-This Is Said to
Be the Secret of Successful Co. opera
tive Buying Farmers Supplies.
The Brunswick news. [volume] (Brunswick, Ga.) 1906-2016, 1910-05-08
ADJUSTMENTS
THE GRAND MONDAY NIGHT;
VAUDEVILLE AND PICTURES

Ri graphs greatest Indian picture
"A Ron ance of the Western Hills"
a = our W the Rhine" a scenic. and
Or Cid Teacher. drama
Nay MuliiSaE. the Cleyerest little
singing and dancing sOubrette on the
circuit will be at the Grand the first
half Of the week, her work is said to
be remembered for a girl of her age.
Katherine Goodrich and Tom Lingt
ham. in their laughable sketch Bet
tvs Luck" will also appear for the
first half of the week these two vau-
deville acts promise to be the best
seen Sc far at the Grand which is say
ing great deal.
Mondays greatest feature is the
lrand new Biograph Indian story "a
ROmnace of the Western Hills" This
clever picture was taken in the heart
Of the California Mountains and the
scenes are acting is by far HE best
this famous I'ioaraph company has
ever produced
The Grand is crowded every night
with delightful audiences If you
haven't been TO the Grand lately, and
are in doubt AS 10 the class of the
vaudeville and pictures offered there
ask any one who goes and they will
tell you that the shoW is clean and
you will get a thousand louehs and
nor a blush.
The Brunswick news. [volume] (Brunswick, Ga.) 1906-2016, 1910-05-08

Free, Free. Free we have a few
aluminium Coffee Perculators to give
away to each customer that buys one
package each Pest Toasties and Grape
nuts .... HAHPEHS.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
OUT OF THE GINGER JAR

The crow sticks steadfasty to. his caws.
 The chewing gum girl lives from hand to mouth
 The night key is not usually the key to success.
 Even the wise men are occasionally otherwise.
 A mortgage on the house will not prevent the roof from leaking.
 There are some men so lazy that they will not even file their liens.
 It isn't worth while to call in veterinarian for bad case of eggs.
 The bushes of promoter is to persuade your money into his pocket.
 A little vanity keeps a man keyed up to his best, while too much renders him obnoxious to his fellows
 There is many stump speaker who would much better be at home pulling the stumps from his own clearing
 Bob: ''I see Smith in town; what motive brought him? Bub: "I don't know for sure but I think it was locomotive"
 Some of the real farmers complain that the average city agriculturist doesn't know corn on the hand from corn in the ear.
 The man who sets out in life's race expecting to have a walk-over is likely to be run over be- fore he has proceeded far upon his way.
 The simple word "hash" covers multitude of things we know nothing about and assures us that when ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to be wise. The owl sat mute in the hollow tree; Through the long day not sound made he. Why, then is wisdom ascribed to this bird? It is because he speaks never a word. The moral is plain, as all may see: If we would esteemed for wisdom be, And be most renowned of men among, We must early learn to hold the tongue.
 Little Johnny, watching hen cacking furi- ously, said: "I know what is the matter with that chicken. She dropped an egg around here somewhere and has forgotten where she laid it. 7"
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
FAMILIAR QUOTATIONS FROM
 AMERICAN POLITICS

''Liberty and graft, now and forever, one and inseparable'
 "I'd rather have the poodle than be presi- dent.'
 "Where did you get it?'
 "Give me graft or give me death" "With malice toward none with an appro- priaton for all.''
 ''Public office is private steal" "Oy you Ananiasn'
 "First in bluff, first in gulf, first in the pockets of their countrymen." "Millons for revenue, every cent for the politicians.
 'Shake the plum tree"; "Let us have-the pieces"
 'Search me; Pm immune"
 ''Let no guilty man escape; but catch him first
 .''To the trusts belong the peOple.' coffee for the revenue only; we Ire not here for our health."
 ''The square steal, or honest graft" "Corrupt and disconcerted; there is money still left in the treasury"
 "Never touched me- look for the man low CT down.
 ''Protection for the police; they need the money"
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
COMPETITION AMONG CITIES

The most significant feature of modern pro gress is, perhaps, the rivalry of cities. Here competition is in its full vigor, and combination is impossible It is this, more than all legisla- ton that is reducing railway rates and compell- ing better railway service.
 It is very small community now that hash t its Commercial club or similar organization, and these are all "on the job.' Each city has it's products and industries. These are constantly looking to broaden their market and this is fol- lowed by a reach for new products and new in dustres.
 For this the organization of business men is the first step, the drawing together of the local forces as a unit It makes no difference whether the city is 1000 population or 30OO,OO0, the need and the method are the same. Even Boston has now rubbed its classic glasses and is aiming for a business mems organization of 5,OOO with a ways and means or public affairs committee of 250.
 It is this latter feature which is of most local interest, this aim to bring together as large a number of the main body as is possible into one compact working committee.
 The reports recently published, told quite uni formly of this common policy. Boston is to adopt it. Cleveland and Chicago have it. In each instance this large committee meets week
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
THE NEW ISSUE IN ENGLAND

The English parliament is certainly making history Recently the lords formally renounced their hereditary right to membership in the upper house. By vote of 175 to 17 they adopt ed the third of the Roseberry resolutions declar- ing that birth should no longer entitle any peer to sit and vote in the house of lords.
 There are now GIG peers who have that right. It is significant that less than 200 were present and voting upon this question. This would seem to prove either the entire indifference of the great majority of the lords, or that more than 400 of them, while opposed to a surrender of this right, so realized the necessity that they took the easiest and possibly the most dignitied way out by remaining away.
 And yet 200 is much more than usually attend the sessions, and those present included the more active of the peers, while the vote was overwhelming. The two resolutions prelimin- ary to and leading up to this third and final step had already been adopted with practically no op- position.
 The very day before this action, the govern ment, or majority of the commons, had outlined the liberal program as to the lords. It consist ed. as in the lords, of three resolutions. The first declares that the upper house should no longer have the authority to either reject or amend any money bill.
 The second declares it eXpedient that the pow CTS of the lords over any other measure be so re- stricted that bill shall become law when passed in three successive sessions of the commons The third would limit the duration of each parlia- ment to five years; it is now seven unless pro- rogutd
 It is expected that these resolutions will be rejected emphaticaly by the lords; that parlia- ment will be prorogued, and new election held in May. This would present to the country this new issue of the program of the lords to create an upper elective body from the peers versus the program of the commons to practically strip the upper house of all its authority.
 This, also, will be the sole issue, as the budget will have been passed, carrying with it the land tax and this, with the question of the alternative of protective duties, will be side-tracked Just as flyer into the future, we predict that the country will endorse the program of the peers, for England still dearly loves a lord, and yet the peers themselves may be less interested, since it is good deal like heads we lose and tails you win.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

Some people are good because they don know any better.
 A man can get good qualities by dying and having them put in his obituary.
 All the advice a man wastes on other people might do some good if he tried it on himself.
 The only thing easier to do than to break good resolutions is to spend money you resolved to save.
 Once in while man turns out so much bet ter than he was expected to that everybody is suspicious of him.
 It is easy for the man who never wore dress suit in his life to blame all the discreditable things he hears on polite society.
 Temptation gets in its fine work by your think ing it isn't
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
POINTED PARAGRAPHS

Filtration is attention Without Intention.
 A woman never eXaggerates when speaking of her age.
 He's the sure-footed mule who can kick the same spot twice. Never forget especially if he owes you anything.
 It's often what the wife wants that the hus- band says he can't afford.
 A woman is proud of her wedding ring even if her marriage is a failure.
 Opportunity is apt to dodge the man who spends all his time waiting for it.
 The trouble with the average man is that his ideals are higher than his salary.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
DAILY ARIZONA SILVER BELT

ly at lunch as sort of public forum for the discus o of public affairs
 Here any one who is a member of the club is welcome and here opportunity is given every one to broach any subject or call up for consider ation any project which may be for the good of the city The meetings are democratic are wide open, all are made to fee! for the time as mem- bers of the committee and not mere listeners.
 In this way the entire club is interested, latent activities and abilities are developed and the younger men are brought into touch and made of use It is the best way, as experience has shown to arouse united civic spirit and civic pride, which is the prime necessity to meet the shar' keen and never-sleeping competition of rival communities.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

The Bisbee Miner refers to Ca dreary gath ering of democrats" Compared with the mon key and parrot time now on within the repub- lican ranks we presume that any move that dem ocrats might make would appear decidedly ''dreary' to the disciples of the G. O. P.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

Bisbee democrats in convention assembled have resoluted against the senate statehood bill Democratic opposition is exactly what the pro- posed bill is courting. It is the aim of the re publicans to have the responsibility for the de feat of statehood placed at the door of democ racy.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

the people as a whole and not of political par ty. He will recognize upon his return to Amer ica neither standpatter nor insurgent The flu ture political course of Theodore Roosevelt is very plain
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

Now if some of those adults who have been sharing with the little tots the pleasures of whooping cough do not prove pikers, they will stay for the revived game of measles, now some thing of fad in Globe
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

There need be no fear Democrats in the sen ate will vote for almost any kind of an old state hood bill. The responsibility for the defeat of the measure, good or bad cannot be placed with the democrats
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

Outside newspapers quite frequently allude to Globes new $35000 Elks home. Tack on another 5000, gentlemen.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

The Wells-Fargo Express company is to make avoluntary reduction of rates. Now, if the com pany will give Globe free delivery in the resi- dence districts, all will be well.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

It is claimed that after the Greenleaf slice is chopped off, Graham county will be even more solidly democratic than ever before. But how about Greenleaf county!
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

In shipping through to Arizona from Los An geles and San Francisco in less than carload lots the railroad company will at least get its init on the money quicker.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

It's an i'll wind that blows nobody good The death of Justice Brewer will give Standard Oil and the tobacco trust a new trial.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

It is said that booze bon bons have struck; Arizona Evidently intended for Texas or some other prohibition state Arizonans are still talk ing theirs straight.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

'What made that stout man jump so nervous ly when the driver cracked his whip?" 'He's used to jumping when the whip cracks"
 ''Is he in circus?''
 "No, he's in the legislature
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

The Republican has heard that "Los Angeles may become competitor of Phoenix" Now wouldn t that be awful!
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

"Not on earth'' runs headline in the Phoe- nix Republican. Probably the answer of the housemaid in the home of an aviator
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

There is some consolation to be had in the fact that the coal miners decided to strike on the eve of summer rather than in the midst of winter.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

People who have little to do generally are pretty busy stirring up things for those who are actively engaged in legitimate callings.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

While all the outside world apparently is tossed in snowstorms and blizzards and Cali fornia is deluged in rain Arzonans are enjoy ing the best climate in the world
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

Of course if the E. P. X S. w. railroad is go ing to hit "the' points in Arizona we might just as well get ready to receive another rail road in Globe
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

The Phoenix Republican is gradually coming through It is now willing to admit that the new tariff law is partly to blame for the high cost of living.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

A man never knows how many relatives wo- man has until after he marries her
 When young couple are engaged, people don't pay any attention to their foolish actions.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02
MORNING SMILES

Stella-Two is company and three is Bella-Divorce
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

''To make baseball poetry is possible" as serts the Phoenix Republican. Yes but it ism t likely to make hit
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

The Tucson Citizen is critsed for defending
 Cannonism. Why? The Citizen is repub- lican newspaper and Cannon stands for all there Is and all there ever has been in repubIicansm.
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

Should Theodore Roosevelt be the next presi- dent of the United States he will be the choice of
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

She-History repeats itself, you know.
 He-Not always. You never heard of man eloping more than once, did you?
Daily Arizona silver belt., 1910-04-02

While scouting around in the wilderness of Africa looking for things of unusual size, it would be interesting to know whether or no T. Roosevelt gathered unto himself new big stick