Kingsbury County independent. (DeSmet, Kingsbury County, S.D.) 1894-1929, 1910-02-04

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I'm ance. Scarcely a
eN* day passes that
@& news columns are
H not filed with di-
vorce proceedings
NJ F either in high life
N or low. 1t is the
theme of books. of
sermons, OF plays,
of public discussions. Never in history
has 1t occupied so completely the center
OF the stage.
Various reasons are brought forward
as to the cause. Some say that mar
riage is taken lightly because divorce
is so easy; others that divorce is easy
because marriage is taken lightly. 9th
ers contend that we have not so strict
a national conscience as formely; that
our ideas of right and wrong are not
so clear and high. Still others blame it
on the unrest of women Undoubtedly
these las are named ADAM.
Probably all these reasons enter to
some extent into the cause. Marriage
today has been robbed of much of its
sa~credness and mystery. Never in his
tory has all its problems been so thor
oughly sifted, all its pros and o
discussed, all it's advantages and dis
advantages brought into the limelight.
Formerly romance enshrouded 1t before
the vows were taken and the veil dis
creetly drawn afterward. IL troubles
and quarrels arose, ii was behind the
closed doors OF the home. Now they
are aired differently before the public
In courts of law. 1t has thus lost to
some extent It's sacredness in the pub
lie eye and divorce is no longer a dis
grace. This light view of marriage or
this Easy way of taking divorce has no
doubt something to do with the prevail
nee of divorce.
Our national conscience is also re-
forming. Our ideals Of right and wrong
on some subjects are In a state Of tran
sition. When standards are shifting,
there is always more or less breakage.
But in the new without doubt, there
will be a gain. When the smoke of bat
tie has cleared away, II will be seen
that there Is an advance. Marriage
itself will be on a higher plane than
formerly, one that means greater hap
piness for both the man and the Worn-
an. But no doubt at present fl helps
the divorce mill to grind.
The unrest of women has undoubt-
eddy much to do with the present in
crease of divorce. But ii is the unrest
of women coupled with mans lack OF
understanding OF the cause of this un-
rest and his unwillingness TO grant
what she asks. Women are at present
in a safe OF ferment. They are be-
ginning 10 realize their powers and
what life offers TO them as their in
dividuality is developed. The world is
theirs now as much as il ever was a
mans, and this liberty is going a bit
TO their head. Foremrly they had to
endure and endure silently. Now the
divorce court is ready TO strike off their
letters. This very fact makes at times
letters seem irksome that really are
not.
If men accepted this changing at
titude of toward life. admitted
that she has right to some extent on
side n shaped their course ac-
cordingly, there wouldn't be so many
divorces. But they don't. They go on
heedlessly after the old fashion and the
thinking woman rebels.
Formerly woman yielded because she
couldn't do anything else. Now she
doesn't.
But underlying all these surface
causes liz the real root which. after all,
down to character. S~eifshness,
and simple, lack of forbearance.
OF self control are the seeds from
which all the trouble grows. IT is sell
fishness on the mans part in wanting
his way, In wanting his wife TO live her
life according TO his notions; s%elfshness
In the woman in wanting to develop her
at the expense of his hap
piness. She, to be sure, has more rights
On her side, for In the long run the
that women are developed the
for the nation. The woman
extravaganza drives a man to
the divorce court lis selfish. The man
who is cruel or Indifferent until she can
no longer bear 1t. is selfish.
The lack OF forbearance, the lack OF
self control underlie the laxity OF view
IN regard to marriage. "Ohl it isn't
while 10 put up with each other"
the disagreeing parties conclude: 1--WE
get a divorce
The shifting, unsteady ideas OF the
lay as to right and wrong seem to
give sanction 10 the proceeding. A
woman thinks she is right in demand
ing recognition OF her individuality.
man thinks he is doing a moral
wrong In living with a oma he no
loves.
They make no effort to weather the
as in the past, because today,
the clouds gather, the wind rises
anu tho whftv caps begin co ssfow sh5fsT
IL has become the easy fashion
10 make for the divorce court harbor.
In the past the effort would have been
made TO ride out the storm, and In
nine cases out of ten il proved to be
a passing gust that did no great
damage.
Unselfshness, ~forebearance and self
are the ballast needed for the
matrimonial voyage and equal guam
titles for each passenger embarking.
With these on board and love for the
the most violent storm can
outridden witho I any To
the divorce court.