Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1910-10-13
RED tape EXPERT
An East indian Clerk Who
stunped al English Official.
BEAT HIN AT His l.,.'..l GAME.

BEAT HIN AT HIS Il,.'....l GAME.
In I'll. Fine Art Of cireun,lccution eabu
Tara chand Made His Prstentious
Auditor General Appear Like Rank
Ana teur-A True Story.
The government offices in Whitehall
are supposed to use red tape" pretty
freely. but the supply in London is
nothing TO what 1t is in India. Let
us outline briefly the true history Of
Rabu Tara Chand. late of the subordi-
nate branch of the Indian civil scrv.
Ice. The story is true.
Habu Tara Chand was deputy sub
assistant clerk in the cutcherry OF n
deputy collector In the Swlnkibugh
district of southern Bengal The in
land postage rate IN India ut that
s'eriod was three pies. or about 1
farthiny, for letters weighing one ,ola
One fine day when the officials had
concluded the annual or biennial over
haul of the books of the cutvhcrry it
was discovered that by some un-
heard OF turpitude one stamp of the
value Of three pies q farthing, had
been uMaccounted for. The stamp
could be clearly traced to the desk
and control Of Babu Tara Cl,and.
Thence II had disappeared.
H;ibu Tara Chand was not sumn,.,-
~ * 1,n IL
the target of Il criminal prosecution In
stead he received IL lengthy letter on
blue foolscap paper. pointing out in
detail how certain property of her
most gracious majesty the queen en-
presto wit. one Indian postage STAMP,
of the value of three pies had lrel
committed To his care ON Al certain
date and that III, to the date of writ
ing No adequate explanation had been
forlhcpmin. of said postage stamp.
The communication fell upon the
lucklcsS Tara Chand like IL bolt from
the blue II left but three courses
open To liln-viz:
t;u Resign from the service.
(n Explain the disappearance of the
farthing postage stamp in IL manner
deemed satisfactory by the auditor.
tcl fecoup the farthilg.
or these three courses 1t will be
obvious to amy person with the shall
lowest knowledge of the Renyali char
;lcter that the third one u.p was from
the outset beyond the pale of CON.
sideration. The first Ia, was also too
terrible to contemplate. Therefore
Eabu Tara Chanl sat down and com
posed IL letter which WAS IL masterpiece
in its Way and in which he requested
To he relieved from routine service for
Il period of four weeks to enable hii:l
To make such IL search among the roc
ords of the department. etc. as might
enable him to trace the missing stamp.
This reasonable request was readily
granted
-Four weeks later Habu Tara Chand
applied for IL further term of two
weeks wherein to draw UP Il report
upon the results of his Investigation
in pursuit of the errant postage stamp.
This. having passed through the eight
cen or nineteen different hands nrceS-
saly for such an application. WAS in
turn duly granted. and at the end of
the fortnight Tara Ch;lnd submitted n
report of PIG foolsc,p pages. explain
ing that. despite the most diligent eff
forts and inquiries on his part lie had
been unable to secure the slightest
rew to the cause of the deficiency
When the department of audits and
accounts had fully digested this docu-
ment and presented Il report of the
same in official precis to the auditor
general the auditor general through
the secretary of the assistant auditor
general of the presidency of Bengal
notified I;abu Tara Gland that 1, was
not wholly satisfactory and that the
circumstances bearing upon the loss of
the stamp would have to be definitely
explained! and proved or the deficit of
three pies would have to be made good.
I;nbu Tara Chand stuck to his guns
and wrote again. He wrote many
times. AS often as he wrote his OK
plantations the auditor general wrote
SIGNIFY lHS HIS OllNlil ulSS;tt iSIHcllou
with the same.
Eventually. one fine day about nine
months subsequent to the discovery OF
The loss, and some two years subse-
quent to its alleged prrl,etr,tiun. the
auditor general his interest III the
matter of IL farthing postage stamp be-
Ing overwhelmed In II frontier war
budget-sent an ultinmtum to Tara
Chand. The loss of the postage stamp
would have to be definitely explained
or its value. the sum of three pies. be
duly refunded to- the treasurer of the
Swankignbh district.
Then Babu Tara Chand became pos.
seSsed of an Inspiration which even
to this day is pointed to with pride
aud complacency by even the most cir
cumlocutory of the red tape del art
menIs within the purview of the gov
ernmcnt of India.
Rabu Tara Chand wrote to the audi.
tor general as follows:
Srln reply to your memo. of eth inst
have the honor to state terrible contia-
grafton of my cook house 5th inst.
hopelessly annhilating all documents In
tho case of lost postage stamp of three
pies. property of her most gracious maj
eSty the queen empress. Therefore by
grace of God and under regulation para
1859. section cxNxi. OF departmental reg
uIations. volume 81 N3ensaD. request yol
forward for my information complete
copies OF entire file of correspondence In
this case. so that | can report again upon
same TO your satisfaction. have the
man tNk a uir NOD