Saturday news. (Watertown, S.D.) 19??-19??, 1910-12-23
wATERrowN, soUTH % KoTA, ERnAY DEoEMBER as 1910.

happened to cum out an coilered us
an put US In TIL calaboose tel til,
next day an it was while a languishin
amongst the gloomy walls NV tn Bass
teel in sorrer an heaviness NV spirit
| (mostiy Hamm's Dest), that the jigan-
tic intellect Wv til undersined per7
doosed TIL words Nv wisdom which
shel here be set down fer til use an
benefit Nv sufferin humanity as foilers,
to witt ct setry an SO forth.
| !. en- that is borne Of woman An
most Nv 'em air) air Nv mighty few
days an the; most Nv them is eether
in TIL winter er tollaDle late in tn
ILL. &
In the days Nv, their youth they air:
pestered with kolery infantime an
wind collie an later in lire with chlll-s
blones an inflooehzy an tn last days
Nv man is ginrally wuzz han th' fust.
tn fust.
In tn sweet NV his brow must he
earn his livin, like "vaud" Hopkins 'er
steal it like sis says Abe Sherin does
or beat somebody to it like Baskerville
an whichever way he goes at it he'll
wish, before he gets throu that he'd
tried somethin else, selah!
He blows hisself to new suit NV
underwear every five years 4. an his
wife tu a new hat evry cnange Nv th'g
moon fer man looketh on th outward
appearance an also. likewise. SO does
wimmen 55S
If he shells out librally evry time tn
preecher Nv tn ward boss gifts up an
shouts fer funds he is called a aaeezy
mark" an il he hangs tu his sirno1yons
like tick tu yearlin steer he is
hung up as a .tite wad" an twixt the
two eevils its hard tu tell which to
chapsa.
After menny trials an tribalashuns
he raises up y boy an a gal an sends
am away ti college, An all they do
after they git fhere TO keep look
out fer eaus an rite home TO the old
gent fer noar money an il yew don't
believe it you kin jist ask Jim GIL
christ, fer by thare works We shall
know them an they'll work yon'
pritty hard If you don't watch out.
He gifts into argument Monday
mornl,.,' with his nayber On the right
hand whats six foot in his sox an;
weighs 250) an skeers th' liver out Of
him an the mex day has row with
tn little sawed-off runt what lives on;
his left hand an gifts tn liver knocked
out NV him an a shanty put over his;
left eye an mug on him what he kin
drink out Nv a sorghum barl with all
in about 16 seconds, fer appearances,
my friends, air sumtimes deceetful.
He works fer Lee Slower 'er Lue5
Brickell fer forty yeer an by that time;
he's got about $2.65 saved up so he
borries TIL uther s997.35, givin a NOR
gidge on his house tu git 1t, an buys
a red ottymobeel an before he's he'd
it very long he finds out that glitters
air not gold an likewise all what's
got fore yaller wheels. an nickel plat
ed steerin lever don't allays go when
you want it tu.
Likewise he, sines tn pledge an. gifts
on tn water waggin an jines tn Sons
Nv Temperance or Son Nv Guns"
ur suthin NV the kind an gifts hisself
elected cheerman NV the temprance
committy an shells out libral when 9Th
Couse" gifts tn needin. money pritty
bad an he jines tn cnerch an gifts tu
be piller Nv tn community in glnral
an fust voos VOC know the ole woman
1eeves him alone some even;n an he
sneaks down town am goes ,ff on
jsmboree an that's tn last Of his re-
spectibility an coed resolvoshuns i /.
tn next time Fer wine ARIA mock
er, strong drink air ragin an some
o.these herr new tangled b.. eragess
llir list alb snt as lad
All nv wi u an th above air ihc5
g .liments u,
50 es tTooly, M
!. 3 Abijah Adouiram Skaggs.
Hfx Holler,
Possum County,
r. T. + Efxxexs 81