The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1910-03-01

from Rat Mort the limit; but now,
l am canned hence because am
corrupting the morals OF the inc
briates! Is it not the height, the
crown, the apex of infamy, the
ultra rays of the spectrum of dis
grace? sympathize with Mr..
Tomlinson. of Berkeley Square.
see in his post-mortem career a
prophecy of mine own! But. old
sport, what a wonderfully and
unsurpassably complete structure
it makes of my character!"
ut is too bad" began Carson,
TOO bad?" interrupted Craig
head. "Ow, down't put 1t that
strong, ovid chap! But it is pro.
nouncedly unpleasant, down't y
kneow." And then with tragic in
tensity he concluded: "In the
worlds fields of highest endeavor.
many are called. but few are chos-
en-. My unique claim to distinc-
ton, sir, is in this, that, whatso-
ever to-ran-ta-ra the bugles blow,
|. Craighead. remain the Great I'M
called! Me for the blind baggage
and the tomato-can hat-Happy
Hooligan .Craighead, minus the
happiness. Begone dull fun!
Tears, happy tears! And exc, o
We tears! Great jumping genu-
flexionists, what world"
But" ventured Theodore, in
a sincere desire to comfort his
friend, you've had the treatment,
you know"
True, EliphazZophar-nay, j
will dub thee Elihu, for you have
not been cured of your right to
call yourself a Zoozite or Gittite
still-true, / have had the treat
ment; its dish-water Is in my
veins. its dope in my assimilative
system. The Witherspoony truths,
SO well adapted to the Second
Reader Grade, must remain in
whatever vermiform appendix the
volume of my brain provides for
the retention of platitudinous pom
derosity. / shall lose my sense of
humor. / shall become bourgeois,
un-Bohemianized, Philistine, Grass.
1 must go forth and rob folks like
any other good citizen. Would
that the chance might present it.
self ere l depart for home. By
George! That reminds mel
have no home!"
This was delivered in exactly
the tone in which one might an
nounce the leaving behind of a
handkerchief or cigar-case. Quite
at loss what to say, Carson said
nothing; Craignead, meanwhile.
smiling as if at new and anus
ing thought. Into this silence en-
tered Mr.. O'Grady, Mr.. Evans and
a slender person of about Carson's
size, who at once began the cours-
ing of imaginary game on the
Wallpaper, slapping his thigh and
laughing at SfCIy IdlluIt.
This" said Mr.. O'Grady, in
PRODUCING the indoor huntsman,
lis Mr.. Wylie, Mr.. Carson"
my worst fears confirmed"
Missed Craighead. 1.-THE one man
l ever loved turns out to be-oh,
We gods! both a teller of truth
and victim of regular habits!
The last straw, and no julep!"
Carson looked at Wylie; await
ing Mr.. O'Grady's development of
his case.
I'VE are, of cawse," said
O'Grady, SORRY to have interfered
with your plans, Mr.. Carson,
but"
Mr.. O'Grady's grave discourse,
in which Carson could feel himself
being placed irrevocably in the
wrong, was interrupted by Mr..
Wylie's making a swoop upon an
imaginary animal on Mr..
O'Grady's nose.
81 most caught him." he
cried. A bumblebee! A humble
bee! Sunday, gnats; mosquitoes,
Monday; Tuesday, flies; bees
Wednesday; hornets yesterday and
bumblebees today. Big game soon!
Ha, ha, ha. ha! Whoop!"
Craighead attentively scrutin-
lied Mr.. Wylie, who was lurching
about the room with wild simu-
lation of mirth.
"Long-lost brother, evidently"
remarked the Great Uncalled. az
note the Craighead strawberry
mark. Well, when he gets to
elephants, ! may claim relation
ship"
CONTINUED Tomorrow