The Washington herald., 1910-04-25
MAXIMS OF MARK TWAIN.
They Are Full OF HOmeIy wit, and
of Deep Wisdom.

OF Deep Wisdom.
ITO be good is to be noble; but 10 show
others how TO be good is nobler and no
trouble"
Noise proves nothing. Often a hen
who has merely laid an egg cackles as
if she had laid an asteroid."
Training IS everything. The peach was
once a bitter almond; caulihower is moth
ing but cabbage with college educa-
ton"
The autocrat Of Russia possesses more
power than any other man on the earth:
but he cannot stop a sneeze."
Habit is habit, and not to be flung out
Of the window by any man. but cOaxed
down stairs a step at a time"
"One OF the most striking differences
between cat and lie is that a cat has
only nine lives"
When I reflect upon the number OF
dlsagreeable people who I know have
gone 20 better world, am moved to
lead a different life"
THE true Southern watermelon is a
boon apart. and not 10 be mentioned with
commoner things. Il is chief Of this
worlds Injuries. king by the grace OF
God over all the fruits OF the earth.
When one has tested It, he knows what
the angels eat. II was not d Southern
watermelon that Eve took; We know IL
because she repented."
BE good and you VIII be lonesome"
Few things are harder 70 put up with
than the annoyance OF a good example"
1T were not best that we should all
think alike; it Is difference, Of opinion
that makes horse races"
Even the clearest and most perfect
circumstantal evidence is likely to be at
fault. after all. and therefore ought to be
received with great caution. Take the
| case Of any pencil sharpened by any wo-
man; II you have witnesses. you will find
she did It with knife. but IL you take
simply the aspect Of the pencil you will
say she did It with her teeth
April !. This is the day upon which
we are reminded OF what we are on the
other 354"
The English are mentioned in the
Bible: Blessed are the meek. for they
shall inherit the earth"
but the principal one was, that they es-
capped teething."
There IS this trouble about special
providence-namely, there IS so often a
doubt as TO which party was intended 70
be the beneficiary. In the case OF the
children. the bears. and the prophet. the
bears got more real satisfaction out OF
I the episode than the prophet did, be-
cause they got the children"
There IS no character. how 50 ever good
and fine. but Il can be destroyed by rid
cule, how so ever poor and witless. OBJ
serve the ass, for instance; his character
/ is about perfect; he IS the choicest spirit
among all the humber animals. yet SEE
what ridicule has brought him TO. IN,
stead OF feeling complimented when ",
are called an ass, we are left in doubt"
/ Consider well the proportions o.
! things. Il IS better 20 be a young June
\ bug than an old bird Of paradise"
Why IS II that we rejoice at a brit
and grieve at a funeral? II IS becaus
/ We are not the person involved"
All say. How hard it IS that we havr
20 die'-a strange complaint 70 come from
| the mouths OF people who have 10 live
1t Is easy 90 find Fault. II one has tina
/ disposition. There was once a man who
not being able 20 find any other faul
with his coal. complained that there wer,
I too many prehistoric toads in It."
When angy, count four; when very
| angry. swear"
/ "The holy passion OF friendship is o.
so sweet and steady and loyal and endur
ing a nature that It Will last through
| lifetime, II not asked 10 lend money"
Classic A book which people prais
and don'y read"
The man with a new idea IS a cranl
/ until the idea succeeds"
Truth Is stranger than fiction. but {
/ IS because fiction IS obliged 70 stick Z
I possibilities; truth isn't"