The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1910-05-04
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MAXIMS OF MARK TWAIN. !
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one of his books:
These wiSdoms are for the Turing
of youth toward high moral attitudes.
The author did not gather them from
practice, but from observation. To
be good is to be noble; but to show
others how to be good is nobler and
no trouble" Some of the other max
inns read:
Noise proves nothing. Often hen
who has merely laid an egg cackles as
If she had laid an asteroid."
Training is everything. The peach
was once a bitter almond. caulinower
is nothing but a cabbage with a col
lege education"
THE Autocrat of Russia possesses
more power than any other man in the
earth; but he can not stop sneeze"
"Habit is habit, and not to be flung
out OF the window by any man. but
coaXed down stairs n step at Il time"
"One OF the most striking differences
between Il cat and lie is that a cat
has only nine lives"
When i reflect upon the number
OF disagreeble people who know
have gone to n better world. | am
moved to lead Il different life"
The true Southern watermelon is a
boon apart, and not to be mentioned
with commoner things. 1t is chief of
this worlds luXuries. king by the grace
OF God over all the fruits of the earth.
When one has tested it, he knows what
the angels eat. 1t was not South
ern watermelon that Eve took; we
know it because she repented"
BE good and you will be lonesome"
Few things are harder to put up
with than the annoyance of good ex-
ample"
1T were not best that we should all
think alike; it is difference of opinion
that makes horse-races."
Even the clearest and most perfect
circumstantial evidence is likely to be
at fault, after all, and therefore ought
to be received with great caution. Take
the case Of any pencil sharpened by
any woman If she did it with n knife;
but if You take simply the aspect of
the pencil you will say she did IL with
her teeth"
April |. That is the day upon which
we are reminded of what we are on
the other 364"
ich t., Il,
Bible; Blessed are the meek, for they
shall inherit the earth"
Adam and Eve had many advan-
lures. but the principal one was. that
they escaped teething."
There is this trouble about special
providences-namely, there is so often
doubt as to which party was intend
ed to be the beneficiary. In the case
OF the children the bears and the
prophet the bears got more real salts
faction out Of the episode than the
prophet did, because they got the chill
dren"
There is no character, howsoever
good and fine, but it can be destroyed
by ridicule, hOwsoever poor and wit
less. Observe the ass, for instance:
his character is about perfect; he Is
the choicest spirit among all the hum
bier animals, yet see what ridicule has
brought him to. Instead of feeling
complimented when we are called an
ass, we are left i'm doubt"
Consider well the proportions of
things. 1t is better to be a young
June-bug than an old bird of para
disc"
why is ii that we rejoice at a birth
and grieve at funeral? 1t is be-
cause we are not the person involved"
"All say, How hard it is that we
have to die-a strange complaint to
come from the mouths of people who
have TO live"
1T is easy to find fault, If one has
that disposition. There was once a
man who, not being able to find any
other fault with his coal, complained
that there were too many prehistoric
toads i'm it,"
When angry, count four; when very
angry, swear"
"The holy passion OF friendship is
of so sweet and steady and loyal and
enduring nature that 1t Will last
through lifetime, If not asked to lend
money"
Classic = book which neonle