Omaha daily bee., 1910-06-29

line at Sycamore Hin were rounded up by
Theodore Roosevelt last saturday, and es-
corted into his library. What do you
think OF that?'' he asked, as a sweeping
gesture Of his hand indicated the stacks
Of mail In the room over in one corner
was a pile OF letters taller than the col
onel and ever so much broader. 1t must
have contained at least 10000 communica-
lions. Piled up along the opposite wall
were 1000 or more books sent by friends
authors and publishers who are looking
for Endorsements. only a few had been
unwrapped. In another part OF the library
were heaps of magazines and weeklies
every sort of periodical with information
ranging from Arctic exploration to the
care of little goldfish.
Just look at itv' said the colonel Ism I
it awful?
II want you boys" he said Ito make
II clear that it's utterly impossible for one
man to cope with this mail II every man,
woman and child In the United States
stopped writing to me today 1t would take
me six months, with the assistance OF Il
large clerical force, to answer their let
tiers. There are probably many letters
from close personal friends, but it Is i'm
possible to separate the important from
the unimportant I'm getting the mail of
the White House, and 1 haven't the White
House staff to dispose of this great mass
Of correspondence"
Judge Joseph Fitch, sitting on the bench
of police court in one of the outlying dis
tricts of New York, a district near enough
to Long Island to receive bibulous infec-
tion has defined the difference between
an appetizer" and the drinks" He was
hearing a case against hStel waiter who
had served cocktails to two men who had
seated themselves at a table in the main
dining room on Sunday. A policeman
saw the liquids poured down with gusto,
and took the servitor before the court
"A man is entitled to one drink before
a meal, said his honor, and to serve
that is no infraction of the law. The
waiter evidently believed that the men in
tended to order a meal. 1t is the habit
of many men to take an appetizer before
meal and waiter has a right to serve
it. The case is dismissed"
Out Jamaica way, hereafter no one will
ask for whisky or beer on Sunday; he
will call for IAN appetizer" and then pos
sibly wander on to another hotel and again
commit a liquid assault on his appetite.
A little girl ran into the West R5th
street police station one morning last
week, handing Captain Farrell note.
Can my papa stay homer" she asked.
The note read:
'Patrolman Frank Sherry First platoon:
Just arrived-a girl"
HE can stay home" said the captain.
Half an hour later another girl hurried
in with another note. 1t read:
Tirct Nlaf M
wants leave of absence for a day. A boy
Captain Farrell had scarcely granted
leave to the second happy father when a
little boy came in with still another note
from Policeman Bernard Welnkelman, OF
the First platoon. This time it was girl
that had come to the home at One Hundred
Thirty Eighth street and ST. AIMS avenue
Finally later In the day Policeman 'Dia-
mond Dick" Crossen further depleted the
First platoon by announcing the arrival OF
a nineteen pound baby boy at his home
at one Hundred Twenty First street and
Sylvan avenue. He added to his request
for leave of absence that the big little
fellow would surely be cop" some day
"All right" said Captain Farrell, resign
eddy. But remember, you men of the First
platoon, this is positively the last"
Here's another little lesson in economics
In New York City there are 100000 eggs
| in cold storage waiting for winter prices
They cost "a cents a dozen. The charges
for storage and insurance will be cents
dozen. They will sell, probably for A
cents a dozen, leaving a net profit Of about
10 cents a dozen, or a total profit of some
S7OO,OOO Now figure out who ought to
have that 100000.
In the front window Of a sporting goods
house is a continuous performance that
holds that portion of the street audience
which has cast wistful eye toward wood
land camps for the summers outing. A
miniature fireplace has been constructed
with flue that connects with some escape
pipe which the fire department apparently
approves Of. With that fireplace and heaps
/ 49, rtv,Ill