The San Francisco call., 1910-09-04
Opinions Of ( Philistine
By Mrs. Ebert Fl u b bare d

Y JOUR letter has interested me very
much indeed. certainly appreciate
the difficulty that confronts you in
that people VIII not tell frankly and
honestly what their experience is. My
Husband and I are friends, and can
speak our inmost thoughts 20 each
other. When young people meet on
natural basis, our present civilization
insists that it must necessarily be fol-
lowed by 4 permanent, lifelong friend
ship. The truth seems 10 be that the
Cosmie urge brings a meeting, which
II followed by an enforced close rela-
tionship. has incompatibility as a Sc
quence.
Nature has but one thing in mind.
Civilization has reckoned without this
saet: Ayouth and a maiden meet when
passion is strong. the viii undis-
-cipaned. and judgment undeveloped.
Convention says there is but one thing
70 do when young people thus are
. strongly attracted TO each other. and
that is TO get the sanction of society
and make arrangements for a perma-
-nent, perpetual intimacy Nlrn each
other.
The youth expects the perpetual
beauty. smile and charm OF the ball
room. reception or parlor; the maiden
insists that all life be one protestation
OF love. and q cataloguing and indexing
OF her charms. Each has firmly fixed
in the mind an ideal that has none
OF the real IN it-an ideal that is pre-
posterous. ridiculous and impossible,
yet in It high hope and fond desire
somewhere hinted. The facts are that
a struggle has 5ust begun with un-
poetic realities Of existence, OF which
neither ever before dreamed. Perhaps
the wife must rise early, the breakfast
does not prepare Itself, nor are the
rooms IN order without work. The hus-
band goes 70 business. Business per-
plexeE.. Instead OF life being one sweet
dream, there Is much OF nightmare In
the common, very common. work and
care OF everyday existence.
"oh. she is Just Ike other women
'oh, he's Just q common. msni'
The Cosmic urge has nothing to do
with any OF this It has come-and
EonS perhaps. Here IS q social situa-
tion left These two young people have
had something in common, and posi-
bly, this Is only transitory something.
How shall they live together when she
loves what he hates. and he has hopes.
ambitions, desires that are nothing to
her9
He has cheated met" eShe has fooled
me-" is their heart cry. The truth is,
however, something like this: I'VE
have been deceived. Nature said one
thing 70 US and we confused our intelli-
genes with it. and thought what
CLOSED society said was true. We have
been deceived"
There was nothing that made those
two understand anything about hard
ships. disa greeable duties, discomforts,
WEAKNESS. pain, or that life was one
thing and their childish dreams an
other.
Something is awry,
the papers are saying good deal
about the divorce evil. They bring sta
tst{cs TO show that one out of every
twelve marriages results in divorce.
They have not. however, secured any
statistics as TO whether the parties in
the other eleven marriages have the
rights our constitution allows Ameri-
can citizens. Life, liberty and the pur-
suit Of happiness
The church is working day and night
fc cure the divorce evil One bishop
earnestly recommends the Jewish ana
iheinatizat tiou, Let neither party ever
be spoken 10. again" But how would
TINS remedy the social condition Of the
f%oe This Is sponiShment. but not cure
he cause Of the trouble IS not even
looked for by the bishop is mar
rage tailure2' According to me
divorce co0rts il IS. The church con-