The Holbrook news., 1910-03-04

bet, especially her apple Bal timore American.
 Have y"u read Dobbley's last poem?" T hope so, but I am afraid not."-Harper's Weekly.
 Binks Gin 191O)-What kind of funeral did Howard have? Jinks-A mile of aeroplanes.-Life
 Hired Man-Shooting at air ships? Farmer-Yep; trying to bring down sumpin' to trim Mirandy's hat.-Puck.
 Drop in on us, any time," says one aviator to another. You'll always find the skylight open Cleveland Leader.
 Crawford-Why does your wife want to move? Crabshaw-She happened to see house with two more closets In it.-Puck
 Thompson-Suppose a man should call you liar, what would you do? Jones (hesitatingly) What sized man?-Jewish Ledger.
 She-Did you tell that photographer you didn't want your picture taken? He-Yes. She-What did he say? He He said he didn't blame me.
 Cynicus-That girl never says much. does she? Sillicus-Why, she talks all the time Cynicus-That doesn't alter my contention.-Philadelp Record
 She-Some day want to show you our family tree. He Hooking at her admiringly)-I should like to see It. It must be a peach.-Somerville Jour nal.
 Agnes sat playing bridge all the af ternoon with her back to a glorious mountain view" "Yes. She Is presi Life.
 He-We'd have won the foot ball game if our captain hadn't lost his head She-Mercy! Was it so bad as that? I heard 1t was only an ear-- Boston Transcript.
 ''The time to save Is when you're young" That's all right, but fel- low doesn't earn anything till he gets we'll along and then it costs more to live. Boston Herald.
 Olga Gall excited over Nora's ac- count of her elopement)-How roman ticl But wasn't you afraid<of the lad der slipping? Nora-Oh, no! Mother was holding it.-Judge.
 '.He is suffering terribly. His teeth are locked up tightly" Heavens, Is 1t lockjaw?" "No, they're in a safe and he can't eat anything until he gets
 
 CalIer-AIy uncle died yesterday. sir. and I want you to oficiate at the fu- neral. Deacon Jones-But l didn't know him. Caller-Goodi You're just the man l want.-Kansas City Jour nal
 Jack-I was in a box at the opera last night. Tom-Were you? Jack-I should say I was. I took two ladies there and then discovered that had left the tickets at home.-Boston Tran script.
 Katie-What lovely ring. Matte Isn't it. This ring was given me on my twenty-first birthday. Katie-Real- ly? Why, how well preserved 1t is it's hardly a bit worn!-Cleveland Leader
 So Miss Oldgirl is married at last Yes, and you should have seen her as she came up the aisle. made up to look like a young bride" Who gave her away" Her wrinkles. es."-Baltimore 
 I'm glad you've dropped in, Mrs. Irons." said Mrs. LapslinS. cordially greeting the visitor. This has been a dreary day for me, and call from a friend is like an Osiris in the des- Tribune.
 Count Hickoff-Ze weather is so queer over here. I must get my over coat out. The Heiress-How lucky. Count Hickoff-In what way? The Heiress-That you haven't lost the Daily News.
 Lady Shopper-I am looking for suitable present for gentleman is your friends occupa- ton? Lady Shopper-He is an under .aker. Clerk-An undertaken. Let me. show you nice berry set.-Boston Transcript.
 But money doesn't always lead to happiness" said the poor young man who had just been handed the frigtd nitt. True" rejoined the fair own ,r of the cold-storage heart; but 1t often facilitates the search. Chicago Daily News.
 The two men talked for time in he train. Are you going to hear lecture to-night?" said one. Yes" returned the other. Take my ldvice and don't l hear he Is an aw- ul bore" "I must go," said the oth- IT. I'm Barkins. Life.
 He had managed to accumulate lot if money by more or less questionable methods "I should like to do some hing for the benefit of the town," he old ssWoII |" suQgested the DOOr but