The times dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1903-1914, 1910-05-15
Women in Relation to
the Art Of Conversation

Women who know that Franklin
said every idle word must be nc.
counted for" are also comforted BY
knowing that he reckoned idle silence
to be as pernIcious as idle words.
That women like to talk and ia
excel In what Is now considered to
be the lost art Of conversations is not
reproach. Quite the contrary. 1t la
laudable ambition for a woman to
be gay and ready. willing to welcome
each newcomer agreeably. and to be
able to add an incident or bring an
Illustration to whatever subject may
be uppermost for discussion or illumi-
nation.
Talk renders intercourse informa,
and spontaneous. 1t is one of the
things which a woman may enjoy to
her profit without cost. BY the inter-
course which converse brings about, a
woman learns to know the thought
and Its expression OF the period in
which she lives; by such means her
education may be carried to finish
and her friendships formed. friend
ships which may prove the JOY OF her
youth and tho happiness of her old
age.
Women ms Takers.
A woman in her talk Is not given
of life. She makes use rather OF ex-
perience anecdote. cross-lights and
quotation In tossing the ball of con-
verse to and fro. She does not dsdair
or Ignore the use OF gossip In her
lively interchange of thought. and Of
ten INDUCES in sarcasm at the expens.
of present or absent friends. An in
tellectual woman IS always at her
best when she is approached by the
,tpor ,ytt.
the plano of intellectual equality. She
Is then free TO differ without hesita-
ton. to assert her independence Of
Judgment and her consequent right to
take part In q real conversation. In
fact. no real bright social intercourse
is possible without the parties to II
being on the same plane. for good
conversation cannot be so reckoned,
unless 1. produces an altogether demo-
cratic atmosphere where private judg-
ment is asserted even when assent Is
made.
Matrimonial Disputes.
Marriage has been characterized as
a long conversation cnlivened by dis
putes. In disputes a woman nails her
colors to the mast and a MANS
opinions are only more obstinately In
grained. But through the differences
that are thus threshed out the woman
and the man become better acquainted.
Out of such differences new ideas ara
evolved. and n new basis for future
comradeship and sympathy and under.
standing formed. To a man wife'a
development of character after mar
riage II often an astounding revela-
ton. because drawing-room acquaint.
ance and knowledge gained through
talk there is bound to be superficial
This because of the subjective state
of woman OF the ideal imposed on her
from infancy and worn By her like
hair shirt. helping to falsify her ro.
lations In life.
DodEes the Issue.
Even the fa!seness OF a woman's
position helps her. however, when she
IS disposed in conversation to entrcpch
herself behind tho proprieties, to touch
upon a subject. only to taboo II. an
adroit woman. indeed. often affects
reserve in order to be frank. as she
may wear gloves when she shakes
hands.
When point of business or of con.
duct Is called in question. she will
weigh arguments and consider state
rnents with candor honesty and frank
ness. But IL the discussion turns on
an abstraction. woman's mind ia
anything but reasonable. She leaps
to a conclusion and nothing alters
her attitude toward 1t. What she says
tlTSt Sne Is apt TO say Anu inlH,
though logic and fact be nnarshaled
against her a woman thus cornered
will dodge point of difference by
irrelevant conversational flashes, and
press forward TO safe and neutral
ground over a bridge of evasion which
her discretion has pointed out as
happy method Of escape. Real queens
of the drawing room are like Jap
anese juggler In the practiced art
which they can put out of sight
dangerous topic and revive 1t. shorn OF
its objectionable features when they
will to do so.
A woman easily understands that
conclusion is not reached oftener by
talking than by thinking. But she
knows that in talking knowledge Is
widened In the discussion OF point
mutual interest is aroused. and when
interest does broaden into discovery.
or into imagined discovery the result
is shared. 1t is not restricted to an
individual.
One of the finest things that has
been said in regard to the art OF con-
versation is that the best teachers
OF the art are the aged who sit above
our heads on life's raised dais. and
appeal at once to respect and pity.
They are before us In the march OF
man. They have battled through the
equinox of life and they speak with
US. not as our superiors in intellect,
but in station. THE PASSERBY.