davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
WAITER IN LITERATURE

From 1.-The Point of View" in the No
vember Scribner.
Dickens popularity is enduring, some
one has said. because there is SO much
eating and drinking in his novels Say,
rather, because there are so many walters.
Find me a chapter in Dickens through
whose pages there Is no waiter slipping
in and out: where Mr.. Weller, ST., fails
to call for a double glass of the inwari-
able. and there Is no such incident as
this:
"Here, waiter shouted the stranger.
ringing the bell with tremendous violence
glasses around-brandy and water hot,
and strong. and sweet. and plenty"
All the world loves q wsiter-his fresh
linen $50 long as it IL fresh); his fiirta-
tious napkin; his good-natured en-
couragement of appetite; his waddiins
motion, confined to the lower leg. Why is
you Never Can Tell" the pleasantest OF
Mr.. shaw's plays Pleasant and Unpleas-
anti II It be not thanks to good will
liam" an infinitely more lovable figure
than his accomplished son, the barris-
ter?
speak not Of your walters who are
not waiters-those who only ask briskly'
peg pardon, sir, wish see bed room r.
II ia the waiter with something to eat
and drink in each hand and polite IN
vitation to be merry. that have In mind
At public dinners, even In Dickens
walters are not themselves:
.arureens of soup are emptied with awful
ra pidity-waiters take plates OF turDot
away, to get lobster sauce, and prine
back plates OF lobster sauce without tur'
bot,"-and the whole rite is spoiled Tor ne
bv the interference on the speakers par'
that robs the waiter of his sacerdotal
character. In "Pickwick Papers two
walters play. with Weller. Jr., leading
roles in that famous Eatanswill contest
Of slumkey VS.. Fizkin: ''pumpin' over the
independent voters" as Mr.. Weller ex-
nresses It to ar. Pickwick, at shilling
a. head" But 1t is not for his activity
In the political sphere that one most
highly values the waiter; nor are we
much attracted by that description OF the
White Horse Cellar. with its uncomforta-
ble travellers room, divided into boxes
FOR the solitary confinement Of Travellers "
ana furnished with "a clock. looking
glass. and a live waiter which latter
article is kept In q small kennel for wash
,nr glasses. In q corner Of the apart.
ment;'. for here the waiter is "a man
with a dirty complexion, and q towel Of
the same" This II but = poor apology fol
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
ADRIFTs WITH THE TIMES

greeted me with. Did you ever play this
game of corks?
"Trot 1t out said, and he brought
out bunch of corks and set them In
front of the longest line of guests you
ever saw in your life. Now says he,
the last man to pick up his cork after I
say go is stuck. Coz he hollered, and 1
dug my fingers into the bar in my hurry.
l was the first to pick up my cork, all
right, but l was the last, too. The rest
just stood around and laughed. The
round for that bunch of pirates cost me
exactly $3.50"
New York Evening Telegraph.
SUCCESSFUL AWAITING.
IAN airship is strange place for .
cat"
"Oh, don't know. cat always landst
right side up when 1t falls"
FALL MUSIC.
THANKSGIVING Day
Is drawing near,
The turkeys lay
Is sweet to hear.
PROBABLY.
ED. Oliver, the humorist, is single
man, is he not?'
Eyes"
Il wonder whyg'
Probably he couldn't see any joke In
getting married."
RELIEVED.
IT see by the papers that valuable
article is missing" remarked Mrs. Sokeby.
"Is it a corkscrew?" asked Colonel
sokeby.
mo- a diamond sunburst."
"Oh! feared II was something use-
full"
RECIPROCITY.
A soubrette sang
A winking song,
The front row winked
Back, fifty strong
PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
Unprecedented Prosperity Ahead

The country is about to enter upon a
new era of prosperity-an era that prom
ises new high records in many direc-
tons
Owing to various causes, notably polit-
ical agitation and uncertainty about late
crops, general trade this month has been
marked by extreme conservatism. But
political contests of national bearing Will
soon be settled at the polls. The crops
are surprisingly large and the railroads
will be taxed to their utmost to haul
them.
The great financial interests do not al
WAYS regard the democratic party with
favor. But this is time when capital
will welcome a democratic victory in New
York, and Wall street is already dis.
counting the defeat of the Roosevelt
ticket and the election of Dix.
Word has gone out that the railroads
will begin to buy steel on a large scale
Immediately after the November cleo
tions. AS the railroads under normal
conditions are our greatest consumers
of iron and steel products when they
keep away from the market the metals
trade says. Conversely when they go for
ward with Improvements and extensions
iron and steel companies are crowded
with orders. The Wall Street Journal,
one of the best authorities in this coun-
try, points out the true significance of
the United States Steel corporations pur-
pose to pay holders of common stock
extra dividends. 1T is not likely that
the steel corporation would depart from
itu conservative policy by increasing the
dividend If business conditions did not
warrant such action" says the Journal.
"At the present time the Steel corporation
is operating not much over 65 per cent
OF itc capacity, which would not warrant
an increase in the common dividend.
However. the opinion among manufactur-
ers is that the railroads will start in
to buy steel before the close of the year.
which will enable the company to in
crease its production, and earnings will
show a corresponding increase"
Since the panic of 1907 the railroads
have been working along with the least
possible outlay for betterments. After the
panic was over railroad directors were
grouchy, and naturally so. They settled
down at any rate to waiting policy;
but such a policy is about to be ended
With the railroads back in the market
iron and steel prices will advance. The
price of pig metal may not jump to
fancy figures. But there will be a reason
able advance, and that, too. In spite of
accumulated stocks on the yards of fur
mace companies.
The Birmingham district will feel the
impulse of an iron-buying movement at
once. With splendid crops in Alabama,
with bright outlook in the iron and
steel business and with the vast ex-
penditures for new construction already
in evidence, Birmingham is going to en-
Joy unprecedented prosperity between
now and the holidays. Optimists can well
claim right of way. They will head the
procession; will make it up in fact, for
there will be no place for croakers the
balance of this year.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
SHAKESPEARE AS BUSINESS MAN

This would not exceed from s24o to ESQ.
or from $1,000 to $500 In the money Of to-
day. II we multiply that sum by IA, We
shall know the profits of the entire COM
pany
1t is noteworthy that the amount of
profits from one share in the Globe be-
fore 1913 agrees with the similar amount
of ESQ from one share In the Red Bull,
as shown by new documents in UNIVERSE
ties Studies and with similar amount.
estimated at from ass to a5a for different
periods, from one-sixth of the Black
friars prior to 1908. when Shakespeare's
company took that theatre and divided
1t into seven shares. After the Globe
was built in 1914. the profits were great
ly increased, Writer says. and he now Of
fers to accept half share. In lieu of the
one forfeited, at yearly rent of e13 IS Sd.
or. as an alternative, to take the profits
from the house Hemynges had recently
been allowed to build on the Globe
grounds. and from other houses they pay
the rent of the entire properly to Brend.
and risk clearing then more than the ESQ
to s4o. which he formerly received when
each owned one-seventh of the moiety.
A large fancy has hitherto assumed that,
Shakespeare's yearly income from his
share in the Globe was from $500 to
Coco lin modern money possibly from
$4,000 to e4800 or from about $4,000 to
$4,000 a year,. Multiply that by IA. the
number of shares at Shakespeare's death,
or by 10. the number after his death,
when Ma tha pieI aEield mos odxotftad ona
we have a grand total of assumed profits
Of from a56s00o to f6s.o0o fabout s2sO,0o1
to s324.000 year for the company. This
sort of Biographical fancy" pictured
Shakespeare as shrewd business man
who, having accumulated large wealth
(perhaps s1,ooo.ooo). scorned the noble art
Of poesy after 1t had served such mere
ly sordid ends, retired to his country
residence at stratford, and there lived the
life of a wealthy gentleman.
The Witter Hemynges pleadings supple
ment the Osteler-H emynges, records, and
are also supplemented by them Here
we have Shakespeare and his associates
in precarions business enterprise that
they have staked their whole future upon
in democratic brotherhood. Failure or
success affects not merely the financial
returns. but the dramatic effort of both
playwright and actors. Throughout.
shakespeare's plays and in the history of
the company SO far as we know 1t from
records like these, optimistic ideals DOM
mated the hard conditions.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
REFLECTINONs OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
Some men would rather go to law than
to heaven.
Charity begins at home, and usually it
ends right there, too.
For every one man who can make a
fortune there are million who can tell
him what to do with 1t.
When you meet a woman In the street
with divine light on her face it's a
sign she is going shopping.
A couple don't think about what they
are doing when they are to be mar
ried. because they'll have plenty Of time
60 think Of 1t Afterwards
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

BY Edward Fitzgerald.
Alas for those who having tasted once
OF that forbidden vintage Of the lips
That press'd and press'd. from each other
draw
The draught that so intoxicates them
both,
That. while upon the wings of Day and
Night
Time rustles on, and Moons do wax and
wane,
Al from the very Well of Life they
drink,
And, drinking. fancy they shall never
But rolling Heaven from his ambush
whispers,
80 in my license is it not set down;
All. for the sweet societies make
At Morning, and before tho Nightfall
break;
All for the bliss that coming Night fills up2
And Morn looks In to flnd an empty
Cunt
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
A Popular Raconteur

| T. n. Harris of Helena, in Shelby coun-
ty. returned home yesterday after spend
ing the greater part of a week in the city
on business. He had mDch to say to his
friends in his peculiarly interestin and OPP
timistic way relative to Birmingham S mar
velous growth and the political complex
ion of the state and nation. Among other
things he told this story on Judge Long
shore. According to Mr.. Harris the peo-
pie of Shelby county would not believe
the world was round unless the genial
Judge would admit the fact.
Not long ago." said Mr.. Harris, "a
party of gentlemen drove into the county
seat in a monster automobile. stopped at
the courthouse and called for Judge Long
shore. The Judge responded Immediately
to the call with uncovered head and with
all the politeness and cordially at
gentleman's command. But before the
visitors had time to announce their BUSH
ness a native mountaineer 'driv' up in
two-wheel cart, drawn by a one-eyed OK
with a horn knocked off. Excuse me.
gentlemen said the Judge, here's a friend
of mine from beat so-and-so and I wish
to speak to him about little matter,
after which 1 will see you again
Beat man like that for office! No.
All the orators in the universe couldn't
persuade the people to vote against such
a man. He knows the folks and the folks
know him. Everybody looks alike to
Judge Longshore."
Mr.. Harris continued: I'VE are having
hot politics in Shelby, and the county
papers are belching fire and birthstone at
each other IN manner which we have
never before Witnessed
Mr.. Harris is superintendent of a
large mining camp in Sh elby county.
His friends say that II he is not an
Irishman he is full of irish wit One
moment he has those around him all
but splitting their sides with laugh
ter and the next he may move them
to tears. After speaking of national
politics, hard times and reconstruction
days, of causes and effects and the like
Mr.. Harris said:
THE people of this day and time don't
know anything about hard times. When
was boy IA years of age I had a
widowed mother and was the eldest of
five children. / worked at lime kiln
for rs cents a day and took my wages
in corn meal and bacon. which I 'toted'
a long distance home. after completing
hard days work."
One who listened to Mr.. Harris re-
marked: PLUCK. energy and hope--a
hope that will continue to hope will
surely reap a reward, as is witnessed
In this little story. Mr. Harris. like
many other men who amount to some
thing in this world, has sailed over
seas of adversely and has succeeded in
degree that is certainly worthy of
note"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

If you hear a knocking sound from the
north you can safely attribute it to the
Pennsylvanians who are mailing John K.
Tener's hide to the wall.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

In Egypt, under the shadow of the
Pyramids a railroad strike Of the ac-
cepted union pattern is progressing. and
the Sphinx says not a word.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

A sea-going ship went to the rescue OF
an airship, and it is now the turn OF
an airship to repay the effort. Turn
about is fair play.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Big Chief Bender can be trusted to
bring Indian summer weather to the Ath-
letics whenever he pitches.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
seekin< to UnIte Christians

The Rev. G. F. Mosher, missionary in
China. LIS the guest of the Rev. DR.. w. e.
Evans and win I'LL the pulpit At the
Church Of the Advent at the n o'clock
service today. He viii occupy The pua1it
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Ocean aviators are at present outrank-
ing in the public mind the landlubbers
of the art.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
A POPLAR PHRASE

"A number of society women at Gary.
Indiana, went to a hobble-skirt party and
found they couldn't get upstairs on &C.
count of their tight apparel"
What happened then?"
IAN athlete named George Clinton car
ried them up, one by one."
II see. Somebody probably said, Let
George do It. E"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

When the America became a wreck
at sea it went up instead of down. This
is a new record at any rate.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
IN HOTEL IoBBIES
A Memphis Banker. visit

T. o. Vinton, the prominent banker of
Memphis, who with number of capital
lists of that city are interested in the de-
yelopment of Mountain Terrace, spent yes
terday in Birmingham. 1t had been eight
months since he was last here and he
marveled at the strides the city had
made in that time.
"The more 1 see of Birmingham the
better I like it." said Mr.. yinton. This
Is a wonderful city In many respects;
and when 1t comes to beautiful landscape
effects no city in the south is In its class.
I am delighted with Mountain Terrace.
There has been a great deal OF building
there-handsome building-since my last
visit. Cliff road is really enchanting and
the entire aspect of that section of Bir-
mingham reminds one of poets dream"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

birmingham Is TO nave the opportunity
Of hearing more high music this season
than ever before. To begin with, we are
to have Madame Louise Homer next
Tuesday night. On November Ernest
Hutcheson, distinguished young pianist
will give the initial concert of series
of three, under the auspices of Mrs. AL
drich. The artists coming later under
the same auspices are Liza Lehman and
her quartet, and Maud Powell, violin.
Plans will soon be made for grand
music festival in May. and there is a
possibility of a week of opera during the
coming winter. The Kneizel quartet is
to begin southern tour in April, and 1t
will probably include Birmingham in its
itinerary.
Mrs John A. Cathey Of Memphis is now
in the city, trying to arrange for the APP
pearance here during the present season
of a number of splendid attractions,
among them Madame Rita Fornia, dra-
matte soprano of the Metropolitan Opera
house, and Arturo Tibaldi. violin. in Joint
recital: Madame Gadski, Scharwenka, the
celebrated pianist; David Bispham. the
famous baritone; Bonci, the rival OF
Caruso; a symphony orchestra-either the
ST. Louis orchestra or the Philharmonic
of New York.
Mrs. Cathey has had fine success In
placing big artists, and as her terms are
reasonable she hopes to dispose of sew
eral hundred season tickets within the
next few days--a sufficient number, at
any rate, to make her venture CONNER
cially safe. Many prominent musicians
and music lovers have already entered
their names for season tickets.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

The cat came back although 1t was
not consulted as to either time or method.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

The census cheats have no friends.
north or south, east or west.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Candidate Tener's full statement about
that get-rich-quck scheme is still de-
layed in the mails. and the election is
coming on.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

The Cubs and wellman are now in one
boat Both did their best and both got
up against elements that could not be
overcome.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

That honor" said Mr.. Sothern, has
not been vouohsafed to me-" This is his
dignifed denial of the rumor that he
and Miss Marlowe are to wed.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Meetings of the Illinois Central stock
holders no longer resemble pink teas in
any respect.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Wellman did not reach his goal but he
certainly had a fine sail and accumu-
lated keen appetite.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Politics and the flying machines and
the baseball championship series made
last week one of interesting events, to
say the least.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

There may be apathy here and there
but there is none where the colonel Is.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

No one but the colonel could boom In
one campaign the insurgent Beverage
and the standpat Lodge.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

The fall campaign begins to acquire q
razor edge.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Chairman Huppuch denies that either
he or Candidate Dix is a wall paper twin.
The republican papers and the colonel
will be compelled to invent new fable
to take the place of their favorite twins.
And it is their tariff In any event
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

David Bennett Hill died as he had
lived, democrat. Tennessee should emu
late in this world his example.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

Up in New York they say the coloners
equilibrator is out of gear.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
University Debating schools

The Yale News says that that uni
versity is continuing to pay special at
tention to training its students in de-
bates. both written and oral; and it also
says that Clement r. Wood of Birming-
ham has been selected as one of the de-
baters against Syracuse university
Said lawyer friend of young Wood:
"Inasmueh as American institutions were
founded and are preserved by debates
among its public men. 1t certainly is
fitting that polemieal training in the life
of public man receive attention at all
of our universities. In years gone by
much more of attention was given this
subject at the Alabama university than
now, and 1t is to be hoped that the fu-
ture will see a revival of the old-time
custom. All selections at Yale are made
by trials of skill, and this pertains to
debates as well as football and every
thing else"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

The Wellman airship was wrecked off
Hatteras, and 1t was not the first ship
to go to the dogs in that locality.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
HAPPENED IN OHIO.

There may be nothing in name,
But what think you of this?
Divorce was granted to dame
Whose married name was Bliss.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

noble species; such as we have al
its best in one of the Christmas stories
and in "Copperfield.'
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
THE REASON.

1.-The little widgery boy is not as bright
today as usual"
"Why not?"
Hes been playing in the coal cellar"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
A CLOSE OBSERVER

Have you ever seen a mermaid?"
mo; but I've seen professional diving
girls whose skin was rather scaly.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23
A GOOD JOKE

A GOOD JOKE.
When an aviator falls
People seem inclined to laugh
And a poetaster calls
For to write his epitaph.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

J. III. Barr, vice president of the
First National bank, who attended the
bankers convention at Los Angeles, has
returned home. The meeting was
largely attended. considering Califor-
MAS great distance from the east, and
it was In every way pleasant and in
teresting.
Mr.. Barr visited San Francisco, Port
land and Seattle. spending few days
In each place. He says that San Fran
cisco has been handsomely rebuilt and
that business conditions there and
throughout the west generally are all
right.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

SCORING TEDDY.
What is this New Nationalism we hear
SO much about?" asked Mrs. Woffles.
Profound egotism." answered Mr.. Wof-
f1es. "masquerading in the guise of re-
FORM"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

THE MERRY GAME OF CoRKS.
IT walked into a Western bar said a
New York gambler, land the proprietor
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1910-10-23

PHILoSoPHIC THOUGHT.
Where'er he goes,
He'll play in luck,
Who always knows
Just when to duck.