Norwich bulletin., 1910-05-21
THE MAN WHO TALKS

sensational papers set the 1mag1nat1ons of some people running amuck, and they get all kinds of queer notions into their heads. It will not knock the world askew, for it is running by Di- vine schedule and has been running safe for 2.300 years. There IS seldom a wear that the astronomers do not see several comets in our sky. Encke'S comet returns every 1-2 years, Hal ley's every 76 years, but the great com ct seen in 1S44 is not expected to come in hailing distance again for 100000 years In the matter of speed, comets that make three miles a second are slow coaches. Halley's at last accounts was making over 1900 miles a minute. This world of ours is swinging around the sun once year at a speed of 800 miles a minute, and 1t has been going millions of years and doesn't collide or wear out We need not be afraid, the Engineer is an expert and we have a clear track
 Few persons appear to. realize that spring is as beautiful in it's color scheme as autumn. It is the season of soft and beautiful greens and bright yellows and delicate pinks and of blues and whites in the prettieSt comb bina- tions and if the forests do not flame, the evening skies often do. The birds building their nests and singing their love songs, and the swallows wheeling in the sky are peculiar to the season, and it's cloud -scapes and landscapes
 
 songs and artists to summon Genius to help them initiate them on canvas. A Turner cannot approach the brill1an- cy of the skies, an Audubon cannot re- produce the grace and beauty of goldfnch swaying upon rush. The oldest master in art and the greatest is nature.
 niglltkey more people would know 1t when they see it; but it is questionable whether some of them would be In condition to use it. If they had the key they might not be able to find the keyhole The Divine plan is that man shall get wisdom, and a drift toward foolishness is no aid to accom- plishment of any kind. Nature furnishes nothing with excesses but alarm; and 1t IS the part of wisdom to take notice and avoid disaster. No one can persist in defying nature and live the full time allotted to man. It is not smart to do absurd things; but a few people per sist in making nightmares of life in spite of the good genius who would re- strain them.
 What is one going to do when his eyes tell how miserable he is, his nose how able he is and his chin how mean he is. On the whole, it is not so strange that some people look at us, or that we wish that they wouldn't. But few people really know this, and
  people look at a man because he has wart on his nose, or a woman because she chall1s so beautifully. Most people stare at us in box car because they cannot help it, or because they wonder why we don't walk instead of ride in that fashion. It is not so easy to tell why people are so interested in us.
 If every married man had a ready made excuse when he is cornered by suspicious wife it might not be any better for him. What surprises the men is what a poor excuse will satisfy a confiding wife. The man who watch es with a sick friend found this out long ago, and the man who is staying out to see the comet is well aware of it. But, then, if the women were as dull as wayward husbands would have us believe, it would never have become proverb that More married men would make fools of themselves if their wives would let them When it comes to playing the game of life. the gentler sex appear oftenest to hold four aces. If the truth were really known, the consolation prize oftenest goes to the men.
 It has been said that too many cooks are apt to spoil the digestion of the policeman. but it should be remarked that the policemen rarely suffer from dyspepsia. Since policemen seldom die except from old age, serve long and faithfully, and usually die pensioners, it is apparent enough that the cooks are experts who feed them, and that there is no cause for anxiety in this direction. In the selection of cooks the policemen apparently make no mis- takes, hence they seldom call the doc tor. If it had been written too many crooks spoil the digestion of the po- liceman, that would have been truer, for they not only spoil his digestion but often spoil his picture.
 
 The flowing bowl looks like a cup of happiness to a greenhorn. but the man who has had experience with it knows that it is delusfon and snare. A man who sits down convivially with it at night can't tell who he will be sit ting with the next morning. He may or his wife, or he may be just wal ting for the coroner. The possibilities of the flowing bowl are past finding out. Some men have sat with it so long that they have become such cinders of re- spectability that their old acquaint- ances don't know them, and they have no patience with themselves. The flowing bowl drcwns every good qual- ity in man and just leaves the brute in all his deformity.
 When the census enumerators were taking the census they were surprised at so many women giving the age of 35. Now an English woman calls at tention to the fact that between 35 and 40 every woman is trying to re- member her youth and forget her age. Now this habit readily explains five per cent. of it, at least. It is not a bad habit, either this endeavor to stay the wrinkles of time. A woman is just as young as she makes up. and a man is full as old as he dresses It is harder to find out the age of some men than the amount of salary they earn. We do not think of woman's age, for if she has a. merry heart she will do. Uncle Sam must be amazed at the number of old citizens who have young wives, but he will never attempt to investigate it.
 Seeing the letter carrier with his loaded bag reminds me that some one has said that 90 in every 100 letters is a waste of postage. In other words, they are not worth carting round; but the writers do not think so, and doubt whether the letter carrier would accept this saying for a truth. for he makes a very good living car rying them round, and gets no little amusement out of the signs of joy which these sweet little nothings" IJe nd dx-