Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1910-06-18
STAYING LOVERS
AFTER BEING MARRIED
II is a Matter of Faith
land Self Sacrifice.
(By Dolly Madison. J

CBy Dolly Madison.)
It is not always hard to win az
lection, but the diGculty is to kee,
it. The average woman looks bach
on the days 81 courtship regretfnl.
ly. She compares tie eagerness 81
the man who wooed her with his pres
ent Indifference She says to her
self bitterly:
1t was only the chase that inter
ested him. Now that lie has ne
he does not think t worth while to try
and hold me- And she builds about
herself little wall of pride, and the
man, puzzled wonders what is the
matter, bal she does not know low G.
relieve the situation.
There is nothing which can ruin
the happiness of two people as much
as pride. If they are to remain low
ers after marriage, | believe it is the
woman, who as a rule, VII bring
about this happy result She has it in
her hands TO make the home, 10 maxi
things pleasant and attractive, AMI
when, because of some fancied indif-
ference on the part of her husband sho
lets pride creep in and meets him
and greets him with coldness. She
is raising the first barrier against
the close int macy which is the heri-
tage of all married lovers.
Women complain about the change
in their husbands after marriage.
But they rarely examine themselves.
If the unhappy wife will ask herself.
DO | take the same care to be at
tractive in manner and dress? Do 1
practice the same self-control when
arguments arise? Do | always hold
the attitude of loving tenderness?"
My observations of married couples
leads me to believe that the woman
lets down as much after MARI. age as
the man. If he puts his feet on the
chair and smokes with easy familiarity
where before marriage he treated her
with a Difference, she, on The other
hand, eats her breakfast in the half
soiled ldmono with her hair twisted
unbecomingly on the top of her head
Before marriage he never saw her ex-
cept when she was exquis tely neat.
His ideaE of her was of a being all
lightness and brightness. a creature Of
good temper and perfect grooming.
OF course, it is not always posi-
BILE after marriage to keep up to the
standard of girlHood A man doeA
not always expect it of a woman, and
she should. therefore, not demand of
him too much. She should not feel
that it is a lack of love that has made
him cease to dance attendance upon
her.
The most sensible woman that
know, who has been married for fif-
teen years, and whose husband IS still.
devoted to her, claims she has held
him because he has never doubted
his affection There were days inst
after the honeymoon when she was
hurt and amazed at the change in
him. But she brought common sense
to bear. She repeated to herself con-
stantly He loves me. Ofcourse, he
loves me" She studied him and she
found that he was a man who liked
comfort, who would sympathize witl
her when she was really i'll, but VINO
had no patience with faneied ailments.
Woman-like, she yearned for the emo
tional moments of their early love
max ne. But gradually, she came 10
see that in her husbands heart was =
higher ideal than her own Love 20
him was not a fftful flame. but asteaIy
light that would burn to the end. He
spoke Of it little, but she found thai
he felt deeply. She ceased to de-
mand too much demonstration, but she
trusted implicitly in his affection.
She leaned on his strength and she
found that it never failed her.
To doubt a mans love may eventual
ly influence that love. We can force
a thought into the m nds of others.
To say to a man too often, You do
not love me as you did" may event
ually cause him to question himself.
OF course, there are women WHO
have brutal husbands, unfaithful hus-|
bands, selfish husbands But I be-
l.eve the average woman has the av-
erage man to deal with He has
faults and she has faults. He has his
work in The world to do, to her is
left the making of the home. And
his home making is not merely a
matter of keeping the house, it in
wolves also the study of hard PROB
lens. The woman who would hold
her lover must love him. And love
5 nos selfish emotion, it is rather
thing of faith and self-sacrifice, and
of constancy to an ideal.