davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
Times Haze Chanred

FROM the Macon Ca Telegraph.
Ths Republican Senator's are not will
Ing 10 discuss the Crum nomination in
open Senate There was time when
they would have reveied in such an op-
portunity 20 wave the bloody shirt -
But things have changed
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

It is our mistaken conviction that two
nations desiring 70 dwell together in in
tenationaI peace and concord are not go
ing TO be diverted from their original
purpose by a lot OF nesr-statesmen and
jingoes scattered around and about the
United States.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Marquette. Mich. is reported 10 have
a convict baseball team says the Buffa-
10 Express We do not see how it is TO
make much OF a record, though OF
course. each player cherishes an ambition
TO get out as soon as possible.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
ALITTLE NONSENSE.
A STAGE nlrr.KMAID.

Where are you going. my pretty
maid?"
Down to the fOotiights, SIR" she said.
May 90 with you. my prettey maid?''
Follow your cue. good sir. she said
Ny stage directions" Quoth the SOU
brette,
Make this a solo. and not = duet"
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

"A Chicago man has been sent TO the
penitentiaTy for marrying fifty women"
says the Johnstown Democrat II is
sometimes necessary to adopt heroic
measures to protect men from themselves.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

"A Chicago man wants to pay more
taxes than he IS assessed for says the
Pittsburg Dispatch. II one OF that mans
relatives ever commits murder, a streak OF
hopeless insanity in the family VIII be
easily established to the satisfaction OF
the jury.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

A member Of the Wisconsin legislature
recently walked seyenty-eight miles to
attend a session And still there are peo-
pie, We suppose, who VIII deny that he
earned his mileage
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Il is an even bet. We think. that Arr
iona snd New Mexico will get into the
Union this session OF Congress. The stu
aticn aiternates daily between a sure
thing and a hopeless proposition
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

what VIII a junket be 70 q State
wider when he must conhne himself to
ginger ale and cold cohee?" asks the
Burns CTenn-) New Idea A thing 10 be
most virtuously abhorred. perhaps.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
se,en varietie. Of wrong.

From the Ncw York world
The prosecutor Of the sugar trust says
IT had seven WAYS Of weighing sugar and
all wrong. Why not use a longer and
uglier worf2
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Adam was a Democrat" says the
Allentown Call There being only one OF
him IN the beginning OF things. we sUs-
pect he was the only man in history ever
able 10 feel absolutely certain about it.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
rakinr t. Chnnces-

From the Chicago Record-ssrald
Is it sublime confidence or reckless
daring that induces a mother 10 send
her little boy 70 the grocery for q dozen
eggs7
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

a contemporary says, The Standard
oil Company wants 10 take IN Missouri .
No doubt: but Missouri seems 10 be
something Of a wise old owl in respect
OF that. however.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

mobile visit We are firm in the faith
that Mr.. Roosevelt has keener sense Of
hEmor and appreciation Of joke than
that story would indicate.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

We suspect competition between Presi-
Dental messages and jungle stories is
destined TO be something fierce during the
next administration.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Concerning that much discussed Beauty
squad and the inaugural ball. we sd-
here 10 the old idea that handsome is as
handsome does.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

The royal conversation We should really
Ike 10 have heard, however. was the one
that took place between Edward and
William over the sauerkraut and wurz-
burger
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
Mlnainr &c r..

Prom tie Arkansas Gazette
IN vetoing the census bin. President
Roosevelt speaks Of personal perquisites
Of professional politicians. P-p-p-p-plum
pudding:
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

The Mexican Herald OF recent date car
res an editorial headed Roosevelt
Piatt That is what you might call an
ultra-comprehenslve heading.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Now that the tailors have determined
on the abolition Of freak clothes. cannot
some one suggest 8 way 10 dispose per
manently Of the college yeIIg
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

The enthusiasm and gusto with which
Senator Perkins declines to enter A
spread-eagie defense Of his official con-
duct raises an all but convincing sus-
picion that be IS not guilty.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

ability is that both estimates were equally
wide OF the mark. and that If the cost
OF the lock canal was underesti-
mated. so was the cost OF the sea-leveI
canal If We take this view, Senator
Kittredge's assertion that the lock canal
viii cost S40oaca.090 whereas a sea-leves
canal would cost Slo0oo0.Ooo less. loses
some Of It's startling effect This ques-
ton Of cost is obviously one upon which
light is badly needed.
What is absolutely certain IS that we
are in for al least twice the expenditure
on the isthmus that We expected TO make.
no matter what the type OF canal No
one believes that money IS being wasted
down there. but simply that everything
IS costing more than was estimated As
10 the engineering problems. and their
bearing on the type OF canal. We shall
know more when Mr.. Taft and his board
Of engineers return. but with respect 20
the financial end. it viii be necessary 70
provide means fer carrying on the work
pr construction. irrespective OF the type
finally determined on. Either a lock or a
sea-level canal viii cost at least 500. 90.
900 more than has been so far expended.
and 10 raise this sum 1t viii no doubt be
advisable to issue bonds from time 10
time, as the money may be needed.
Just make up your uaimportant mind.
gentle readers that the absorption Of the
Tennessee Coal and Iron Company by
the United States Steel Corporation was
q case OF benevolent assimilation, and
let it go at that! It is the precise point
at which you get Of
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Curiously enough. nobody evidenced
anything ike hysterieal surprise when
the Presidential result was declared in
yesterdays joint session Of Congress.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Wei. well. at last. Mr.. Taft has been
really and truly elected President OF the
United States. The suspense was Ger
tainiy long-drawn out and trying on the
nerves.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
still at 1t.

Fscn the Boston Herald.
The Roosevelt administration VIII end
as & began. busting the beef trust
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

We scorn to believe TIE report that
Senator -Jef- Davis left the White
House with grouchy scowl on his
face after that recent memorable auto
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Scrouge around, Anaaiases. and make
room for Mr.. Rainey.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
A Rare Boon.

This wireless telegraphy Is 4 great
thing
Yes; It has enabled the humcrists 70
manufacture some really new jokes"
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
OF Course.

OF Course.
Ten cooks applied for the place. ]
fear I selected the wrong one"
Don't woTTy about that. You took
their addresses. didn't your
Y did"
Then We can try them all in rota-
ton.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

This Is sea salt for the bath"
Gives you a genuine ocean efSsct, eh2'
Not quite. Somebody ought TO put up
sterilized melon rinds
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
Confusing styles.

"A Western legislature has reduced
the length OF hat pins to one foot. That
is the law"
Good law, too Now We won't be so
apt 70 mistake lady for q hatpin'
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

They say that skin food viii fiji out
the holiows."
$50 viii two-lneh steak"
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
NeYer HnIts.

Time flies. onward Day and night
II doth bob.
AS flier, t is right
In the JOB.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11
A Modest Man.

Come over &c my house tonight and
play bridge
Cant Ny husband is going to spend
the evening al home"
Shall you signslize the event in any
way2"
'Oh. no. He doesn't Ike for Us 10
make a sensation over f."
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

One Of the visitors TO the Members
gallery. when he offered his card OF ad-
mission 10 the doorkeeper. remarked 20
that gentleman that he had a souvenir
in his pocket. very few Of which are in
existence With that. he pulled out a
card OF admission to witness the count OF
the vote Of the Hsyes-Tilden contest
The card bore the date Of Feb. 1s, ISL.
and was signed by S. ". Ferry. PreSi-
dent pro tempore OF the Senate. and
Samuel J. Randall. speaker OF the House
at that time.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

Prof. F. G. Osborne. Of Philadelphia,
Pa. who is at the Shoreham, speaking
Of German schools. said last night that
to Americans the striking characteristics
Of the German schools were their variety
and their thoToughness. A bey il the
gymnasium may study fewer things than
are taught in the American high school,
but those things he comes TO know well
The German language is itself one Of the
main subjects, not IN dry analysis, but
in the study Of noble literature
1.-The German school Is also demo
crate. continued the Quaker City peda-
gogue in a very true sense. IN Ger
many, as in some Of our States, every
child must 90 to school between certain
ages. Even The stranger in a German
town is visited soon after MS arrival By
a uniformed official. and told, most po-
Iitely. but firmly. that his children must
go 10 school Rich and poor 20 10 the
public schools. and the German school IS
perhaps az once the most thorough and
the most democratic in the world. IN no
German city viii one see the children OF
weIl-t0-dO parents going to private
schools, AS IS the case in this country.
The German Emperor was q pupil IN
gymnasium. where he had some Anners-
can boys as schoolmates.
An American boy entering a German
school finds it difficult TO adapt himself
to certain conditions OF the life. The
pupil, as compared with our American
standards seems 70 have no rights which
a teacher mrst respect
A 5oy IS pct through a process which
seems To Us something very near bullying
and does his work il grest awe Of ths
ieacherH,.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-11

J. Adam Bede couldn't let the event
pass by without getting in joke from
his inexhaustibIe joke book. When the
recess was ordered, some one asked Bede
why II was done
Why" says he. go Jet out some cheers
for Jim Sherman and to take out other
cheers chairs.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Public School.

Some things doing at the High
School.
Rev. B. D. Weeks has been elect
ed a teacher of the High School and
is qualified to fill the position.
A step forward is: Prof. Merl
Tooley has been secured to fill the
Agricultural chair. That means
many of the young men attending
the Monroe High School will never
have the opportunity of attending
the State University and many of
them are farmers boys. Now if tn ey
do not learn to make 1 1-2 or 2
blades of grass grow where pap
had 1-2 or blade of grass or grain,
it will be a lost opportunity and
strictly their fault.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Birthstone.

Always carefully sift the talk you
hear.
Every man finally leaves the
bars down.
There is a certain kind of man
that no amount of effort will ever
make a man of.
A fire cracker after the Fourth
sounds as lonesome as the losing
politician after election.
When a young woman marries an
old man it is an indication that she
thinks she would look well in
black.
What has become of the old
fashioned woman who feared the
cat would take the baby's breathe"
Even a poor, tired old girl whose
laugh sounds like a wall, likes to
be told that she has miSchievous
eye.
You seldom hear of a man swear
ing off nowadays; the topers seem to
be waiting fol- the law to save
them.
Everything is terrible cut-and-
dried certainty with a married wo-
man except this: She doesn't know
what her husband will get mad at
next. - Atchison (Kas.) Globe.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Who Aldrich Is.

In Congress, as now constituted
as now conducted, and as now
working out a problem of profound
import, the people do not rule. The
interests rule, and Aldrich is their
regent. In the tariff session the
potential leader is Aldrich. The
law that will finally be passed will
be more nearly the work of Aldrich
than of all the other members Of
Congress combined.
And who is ALBRIGHT
He is a Senator from the little
State of Rhode Island, where the
people have about as much to say
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Apple-Land.

Apples alcng the highway strewn
And morning opening all her
doors;
The cawing rock, the distant train,
The valley with its misty floors;
The hillside hung with woods and
dreams,
Soft CLEANS Of G0ssc-nc and dew
From cOCk2coN 10 the rising moon
The rainbowed road for me and
you,
Along the highway all the day
The wagons filled with apples 90,
And golden pumpkins and ripe
corn,
And all the ruddy overflow.
From Autumn's apron, as she goes
About her orchards and her fields
And gathers into stack and barn
The treasure that Summer yields.
A singing heart, a laughing road,
With salutatiOns all the way,
The gossip dog, the hidden bird,
The pig that grunts a gruff
gOod-day;
The apple-ladder in the trees,
A friendly voice amid the boughs
The farmer driving home his team,
The ducks, the geese, the uddered
COWS;
The silver babble of the creek,
The willow-whisper the days
end,
With muTmur of the village street,
A called goodnight, an unseen
friend.
Richard LIE GalIienne in The De-
lineatOr for August.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
BlackneSS of Treason.

This is not an editorial from a
Democratic newspaper, but from of
the leading Republican journals of
the country, the Minneapolis
Tribune. 1t was written before the
nefarious measure passed, but is a
dead shot at the present tariff law
Read it carefully.
This is a time for plain speech.
The Tribune does not believe that
any northwestern member of con-
greSs who votes for the Payne-Alf
drich treachery can expect re-elec-
ton. We should have little faith
in popular government if any
could.
Contemplate the blackness OF
the treason in this part of the coun-
try in some state conventions and
campaign speakers may have
pledged tariff reduction with the
secret intention to raise the tariff
We have more confidence in ouI
members than to believe that was
the case here, But if politicians
did not mean to keep their word
the people meant that they should
and will punish them for not do.
ing it.
The national platform was plair
enough, but that of Minnesota was
more explicit. The re-electioD o
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Commend Senator Stone.

The constituents and friends of
Senator Vim. J. Stone, in Missouri,
congratulate their Senator and the
Baltimore justice who decided it
was no offense against the law and
dignity of the state to slap the face
of an impudent negro porter for
offering him an insult. Of course
his political enemies and the low
ers of the race think the act of the
Senator was very "undignifed." -
>Boonville Advertiser.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Loaded Bageaee.

Say suit case and gun easy, to
night operator, Will lesson, at the
Joe depot. He has learned to han
die suit cases with the greatest OF
respect. He picked up a nice one
dropped it on the floor, and bang, a
big gun went off and tore hole as
big as a S in the corner of the case
Frightened man, badly damaged
grip, and its owner ought to al
least say I'm sorry.
Mrs. James Davis of Ottumwa
Iowa, was unfortunate while visit,
ing her sister, Mrs. Walter Dimmitt
in this city. Mrs. Davis laid hel
purse containing $40 on the hal
tree and the $40 did the disappear
ing act.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
No Square Deal Here.

The square deal" is thrown to
the winds in Missouri by the rail-
roads. The same roads that charge
2 ~ and Sc mile in Missouri for
passenger fare are charging only 2
cents a mile in other states along
the central Mississippi valley. 1t
is not just to the Missouri people. -
Memphis Democrat.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
will Not Be So Sorry.

The Democrats of Louisiana in
the Senate and in Congress proved
untrue to Democracy and the peo-
pie and voted with the Republicans
for the Aldrich-Payne-Taft tariff
bill. We are afraid the people OF
this country won't be half so sorry
next time the yellow fever strikes
Louisiana, as heretofore. Boon
vile Advertiser.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Belle Of The 18th Dynasty

The beauty secrets of an Egyptian
belle buried 1867 years ago have
been brought to light by Prof.
Flinders Petrie. He has been at
work among the ruins of Memphis
and Thebes for six months, one of
his greatest achievements being the
partial exploration of the Temple Of
HathOr whose fame has been
modernized in The Worlds Desire, >
by Rider Haggard and Andrew
Lang. The secrets of the Egyptian
toilet are part of the spoils of time
he has unearthed.
Among the articles buried with
this beauty of bygone centuries is a
plot of pomatum which still retains
its perfume. There are other
articles whose use will be under
stood by the well-groomed woman
of today. There is jewelry in
abundance, and by the aid of imagin-
alton MeSSrs. Haggard and Lang
would have less difficulty today in
painting female loneliness of the
time of Helek of Troy than the!
had in their attempt to recall the
vision of beauty to which the Temple
of Hathor was due. Chemists vii
analyze the pomatnm; the toile1
articles will be catalogued by expert;
and in time will attract a passing
glance from the visitor to the British
Museum. New York World.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
There is a Difference.

Ignorant Republicans may not
know it, but the protective tariff
and the tariff for revenue are two
separate things. One conld be re-
pealed without affecting the other.
Kansas City Post.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

any member voting for upward re-
vision would be confession that
neither candidates, conventions nor
people mean what they say. After
that the people might as well alb
dictate at once and for good.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

The successful minister is born
not made. By the use of whatever
tools, vitalizing though he may be
compelled to the oldest and moldi-
est conventions, he comes to his
real work by virtue of qualities
which a theological education can
neither give nor take away. If he
has the soul to endure as one see
ing the invisible, and a heart to
throb in unison with all the varied
humanity about him, and to all
this adds the sense of a high mis-
sion and the burden of a spiritual
message, he need not trouble him
self Overmuch to become "socializ-
ed" He will find his true power
and WELD it. Into the striving sor-
row of the world he will be able to
bring something of peace and COM
fort, and will be the better enabled
to do it for having braced his mind
by hard study and fed his spirit by
long meditation. York Post
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Look at the Side Issues!

Many people claim that the sala-
ry of the governor of Missouri is
too small, but they entirely over
look the income he receives for his
Chautauqua lectures. Iron County
Register.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
The Proper Interpretation.

Viewing the record of the Repub-
lican party the Gallatin Democrat
hits the nail on the head when it
says that &c. o. P" stands for
Great on Promises. Albany
Ledger.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

Miss BeSs Lou BOarman has re-
turned from Kirksville thoroughly
fitted for her winters work. teach
IND the Mt Zion school
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

Charles F. Taft's meat packing
plant at Taft, Texas, will soon be
placed in operation. 1t has secured
a contract to supply sixteen hundred
dressed beeves per month to the
government employees on the
Panama Canal. All the cattle for
this packing plant will be furnished
from Mr.. Taft's Texas ranches. His
ranch embraces 10000 acres. =
Macon Times Democrat. That
sounds familiar. 1t was McKinley'S
brother that got the army contract
for gloves
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
What the Missouri
Editors Are Saying
Noah Could Have Used Him.

If the stories of the personal
proves of Roosevelt be true what
a foreman he would have made for
Noah in herding the wild animals
in the ark. Kansas City Post.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

E. Williams, of Bushnell. H., has
been with his friends, W. D. Barnes
and family.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Twenty-One Bridges and Culverts

1"SHlI-On DIluSSS anu AulNSTtSs
Before adjourning last Thursday
the county judges ordered County
Engineer Caldwell to proceed with
the construction of seven bridges
and fourteen culverts. Some of
the culvertS will be built entirely of
concrete while all of them will have
concrete abutments. Caldwell is
going to put them in TO stay.
The bridges will be located as
follows: At Crutcher's ford, north
of Stoutsville; across North Fork at
Martins ford and south of the 10
Jarboe place; south of Granville;
just south of Greenwood church; in
the John johnson neighborhoOd,
southwest of Paris; near the After
bury place just east of Madison.
New tubes will be put under the
bridge north of Holiday.
Engineer Caldwell was also di-
rected to furnish estimates on a
bridge across Elk Fork near the j.
| W. Warren place; one near the Bella
Hughes place north of Santa Fe,
one north of Madison. Appeal.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19
Blaming the Woman.

This perpetual clamOr eminating
from high sources against women
should be stopped. About once a
week some morbid man, anxious to
get into the limelight of publicity,
pipes off some story about the va
carries of the sex his tale being
built wholly on some abnormal
type. Analysed as though she we're
a plant or an animal, her whole be-
ing laid bare by some limelighter,
decent women everywhere are held
up to ridicule because of the action
of some pervert whose fool doings
are taken to be an indication of the
tendencies of ALL
The last break for the spotlight
has been made by a Chicago wise
one who alleges that wOman's Gu
pidity causes all of mans grating
about the silliest tommyrot of the
whole story. He holds that the av-
erage man wants money to spend
on a woman and thus gets the line
for his argument. He would find
that such cases are but isolated
ones, and that most men desire
money for place, power, or whatever
it will bring, women being only a
secondary consideration. Men adj
vancing such ideas should get in
contact with women who represent
the type rather the pervert and
they would soon get better idea
of the situation. Quincy Herald.
Twenty-0ne Bridges and CulvertS.
l,c%
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

That Texas editor who says that
when you hear a man making fun
of his home paper, that it is not as
good as the city papers, and that
you can safely bet that that map
never spends any money to help
make it better, is certainly entitled
to a chrome. We have such fell
lows in Queen City, and they know
about as much about what a news
paper should be as a hog knows
about Sunday. They complain
that there is no news in the papers
and when the editor asks them
whats the news" they invariable
reply: Oh, nothing!-Leader.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1909-08-19

about the election of United
States Senator as they have about
the canal policy of Mars.
He is closely allied with Standard
Oil and other trusts and corpo-
rations. His life, sympathies,
affiliations and conduct are based
on a point of view that utterly
overlooks the masses for the
people. Carthage Democrat.