The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-12-13
HUA0R or THE DAY

HU1NOR OF THE Day
the girfs e stra bst are # oo big help to
classy to see girl able to keep her pumps
Post. t. 'e'''a' power aiohe' -f'ittsOurE
Nell-She admits she made a mistake in
marrying man old enough to be her
Believes, she had an idea he would
only live few months. and they've been
married nearly a year now.-Philadelphia
Record.
The mighty Casey had struck out. Il
mad to do 1t or spoil the poem" he ex-
planned. Years afterward, however, when
he ,sr saw how the eIocutionists had over
chicago Tribune.
,, II am in hard luck" How sos" Told
training mollycoddles.' weir Then I
many before ' met the rsai thing ned in iG neT
and fhe Of asked me if my proposal was the
iorn hope. "-Baltimore American.
What is your idea of happiness?'' ITO
were going to turn urn in an expense account
when got home. Chicago Record-Her-
aid.
Mary Jane (to the gentleman with the
bow legs who has called to see her mas
from the fire. yer legs is is warping most
'orrible-Leslie' Weekly.
Doctor-You should always take little
fruit in the morning. Guzzler-I do.
am old-fashioned enough to insist upon
cherry in my cocktail.-Philadelpfli Rec
Il hope and pray remarked a gentle
never have occasion to cross the Atlantic
again. Rough passage, eh?" queried a
f fonr K9 h Is no name name Tor II: had
Sun.
you've cut me- wei. well. so it is; but
there, ]. always deduct a ha'penny for
to go out of here having won fourpence
off me."-The Taller.
His wife-This paper says that mans
woman's does Her Husband-ff it does
I'll bet a woman is the cause of it.-Chi-
cago News.
Conceited Bridge Player-Come here and
sit by me, Kittie. You can learn a good
deal by watching my game. kittie. Quick
by other peoples mistakes.-Life.
why are you so indolent?' demanded
the stern parent. You don't see ME let
replied the son: IF You had let some grow
under your feet you wouldn't be so near
having. it grow over your head."-Phil-
adelphia Record.
"There was time said the old inhab-
nen !hss Rsse OF s 9d
opera prinla donna, 'how very expensive"
w ashington Star.
Heien-I am keeping every birthday
childhood days MabeIle--oh. ]. wish I
tiques.-chicago Daily News.
'I am training my boy to be self--re-
his own canoe, eh?'' 'sWeIl, 1 want him to
be able to operate his own motor-boat."-
Louisville Courier-Journai.
Doctor-Hab she bin ailin' long? Hus-
band-Yes, sab, doctah. She hab had fits
OBJ de blues fo gwine on ah week Doctor
Den if dat am ah fac she mus hab in
Observation-Disclosures.
Benevolent Old Gentleman Ito seedy ap-
plicant for a job)--But the last man I
helped turned out to be a burglar. seedy
nercent men like you an as to suffer.
Punch.
smoke nowadaSs?'' WHY" II lust saw
an advertisement offering to any woman
six puffs for a dollar.-Purple Cow.
sIIas he a good memory" mo, just a
common, ordinary. everyday memory. He
remembers people who owe him money
much better than those to whom he owes
money.''-Detroit Free Press.
- q
Its all very well for you to preach
economy said his wife, but I notice
whenever I cut down expenses that you
smoke better cigars and spend more mon
ey for your own pleasure than at any
other time well, confound it; what
do YOU suppose I want you to economize
for, anyway ?''-Chicago Record-Herald.