Evening star., 1909-07-11

take, John. We didn't go into the Wilderness .
we went into the Clipped Garden and the un
necessary Wing
Lantier made no response but as though
some new and startling thing had suddenly
taken shape in his mind he looked at her
sharply; then looked away again and stood
gnawing his lower lip and slowly tracing out
the pattern on the carpet with the toe Of his
boot
1T would have been trying enough if had
been welcome" she went on after pause: but
i wasn't Everything | did was wrong
everything | wanted was low bred and vulgar
everything said was smiled upon pitying1y or
greeted with silent stare OF cold contempt
| had even offended by existing. | learned IN
time. You might have married money but for
me; you might have risen to any height, If you
hadn't hung milestone round your neck Oh.
did full penance IN that house for all my sins.
John-and they meant that | should
Il likened it a moment ago to tomb. but
a torture chamber would be nearer the truth
had led such Carefree happy go lucky, 1r
responsible sort of life in the dear old studio
that. even if | had been welcome III It. | must
have been crushed under the gloom and method
of that gloomy. methodlcal house was young
and full of life and animal spirits | wanted to
laugh and sing and dance and live-just live
| dIdn want to improve my mind | didn't
want to learn things that would ut me to be
something more than mere listener when In
the presence of cultured people! only wanted
W nave Liie iiDuiS So tllit you we've iDiCctl "
be away from me; and sometimes | was 50
lonely. SO heartsick. SO weary Of IT all. that
would gladly have changed places with some Of
the wretched prisoners whose causes you were
pleading IN the courts: for they could see YOU
and hear YOU the whole iay long and no mat
ter what harsh things said Of them, you
were there to speak in their defense
A GAIN his eyes lifted 70 hers with that sharp
startled look OF inquiry and surprise. ami
again they fell. and an awakened Something
dru1' med on the walls OF his underS tarding
Il didn't think YOU cared much. he said
in hushed voice as he put out his hand ana
slowly moved his fingers back and forth along
the rlmme- edge OF an ornamental table, |
suppose 1t was lonely for you: but! ildn'
think of it then | didn't have time 10 think Of
anything but-rnakng my way, And that was
as much for your sake as for my own.
Il always understood that John she made
reply but as l have told you already.
woman is an illogical creature She's proud OF
a man if he succeeds; but she doesn't love him
any the less If he fails and in those days
would gladly have put of prosperity for an
other year SO that | might have had you with
me for single hour, And used to count the
very minutes for YOU to come home, Oh.
how | used to count them. especially when |
had had an extra trying day. But it was al
ways the same-always the same. You were
too tired and tagged out after the days work
to go anywhere: too weary to talk. too spent
and exhausted to do anything but drop INTO a
chair after dinner and fall asleep And SO my
day of torture ended in evening of silence
and gloom.
A red stain came slowly up over his face.
deepening it grew. You surely couldn't
blame me for that, Kit" he said half resent
fully. "A man isn't cast iron. He can't stand
everything and never kcuckle under I'd been
working like dog the whole day long. You
oughtn't to blame me for thing l couldn't
help
I'm not blaming you for it. John; I'm
merely stating facts. If had had home Of
my own to occupy my thoughts during the day.
if | might have prepared some little surprise
for you. cooked some little thing that | knew
you liked it would have made all the difference
IN the world. But in that house | might not
move picture nor alter the position of chair
1t was the Wilderness l wanted, the Wilder
ness and the Axes, and when at last there
came a chance to have them l nearly went
insane with JOY That was-when-rny baby
camel
Her voice snapped and went off into silence.
Lantier shifted uneasily and looked up-and
looked down again quickly, and swallowed
something: and for moment or two that was
the only sound.
KNEW that the house wouldn't be large
enough to accommodate all OF us after
that. she resumed presently, and | grew SO
happy over the prospect of it that sometimes
used to Shut myself up IN room and stuff up
the keyhole SO that nobody could hear me, and
then scream-yes. scream-for sheer delight
at the prospect of it. There had been bibles