The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-04-03
IMPRESSIONS OF A TENDERFOOT
- Being UnorthOdOx Sketches Of Real Human Interest -
(By WILL RoBiNsoN)
(By WILL RoBiNsoN)

Mar has always prided himself
on his intelligence over all other
animals, and while in most in.
stances he has made 1t stick, il
must be confessed that in spots at
least yesterday was the birthday OF
all OF u.s.. We really have no right
to be offended at any OF the games
that were perpetrated upon us, TOR
we are merely parts OF a long pro-
cession OF tools who have choused
around the world since time began.
History amply proves the truth OF
my assertion, and Il is well to re-
call it. II prevents the perman.
ence OF the swell head to Just recol.
lect that all the great figures OF re-
cord have made fools OF themselves
at times. Adam began It. He
vas doing very well there in the
Garden OF Eden. There was no
one to boss him around or keep
him from going fishing or enjoying
himself as a sane and natural man
would, but he lost b grip after a
while and wanted an affinity. He
got her, and right there his troubles
and those OF all other men began.
Eden faded like a dream. Adam
had to rustic tor a Iob. IL became
a serious question to him where his
summer suit was TO come from and
how he was going to keep ahead OF
the ice man, and such toolishness
as go.carts and dresses were never
tar in the back ground. To be
sure II be hadn't had that longing
tor a her, the world would have
missed about all there is worth liv.
ing tor, but it would certainly have
escaped lots OF trouble and worry
and nagging. That the more i'm.
mediate descendants oi this origin
al tool should have grown more
ornery than dirt was a matter OF
course. The wonderful part could
only have been noticed ii they had
done ANYTHING else. II served him
right when the PaIarita overlooked
and all but Noah and his set were
wiped out. Noah in his turn pro.
ceedcd % show his weakness. In.
stead OF keeping the boys on the
old home farm, he let them scatter,
and as a result we have a multitude
OF ace instead OF the first breed.
OF course it we all belonged TO the
same family the newspapers would
be short on headlines and there
would be no Irish, but We would be-
more peaceful. Abraham was a
old tool as we'll as an ass when
he turned Hagar out, not having
the decency even OF the present
Mormons, who look after their dis.
cards, but II he hadn't done II, we
would never have heard the thun.
ders OF Sinai, there would have
been no clothing dealers and no
one Tor Russia TO prosecute at dull
times. IL was a good Job Tor
Hagar when she hit the grit, but il
locked bad Tor the old man, and
does yet, considerably over a week
since II is said TO have happened.
Solomon was a too. The fact that
he had more than one wife demon.
stratirg the claim without any
argument, though some few claim
that It ,howed marvellous govern
ing ability to keep them all in good
humor at the same time. We can
forgive Sol his lack OF sense on
this score, however, Tor il was at
the building OF his court house
that a fraternity was formed, which
has since developed into an institu.
ton as broad as the world, and
which has been an unspeakable
blessing 10 humanity. Pontius
Plate Vas a fool OF the lrst water.
II he had the sense he was born
with, when he vas satisfied OF the
genulneness OF the Messiah, he
would have reported It as a devel.
opment OF the ruling party. Then
he would have been promoted and
sent to the Legislature and the like
oil that. But If he hadn't gone
wrong, we would hardly have had
the New Testament, and there
might nov be no Complexities.
Mark Antony was a tool and a blg
one. 4 soldier tried by time, il
was in his hands to give Rome the
valley OF the Nile and H. wonder.
iul richness and win immortal tame.
Instead OF that he went oil after a
saddle colored lady with a cast in
one eye. No one blames Mark Tor
being fond OF the ladies. Every
man who is worth a cuss has the
same distinguishing peculiarly, !
but when he let Cleopatra tie a
knot IN his lingerie, he tell from a
mighty high pedestal into the fool
dust. IL is no Excuse TO truthiully
say that about three men out OF
hye have since repeated the trick
with variations. Peter, meaning
truly to serve Jesus, in a lew Sec
onds delivered himself nj a denial