davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

When their labors we're completed,
the officials reported unanimously to
Mr.. Taft in favor of the White, and,
accordingly, a car of this make was
Immediately ordered from the manu-
facturers, The White Company of
Cleveland.
The new car was delivered to Mr.
Taft in Washington a few days be-
fore his Inauguration and since that
time it has been in almost constant
use. There has not been a day when
the President or some member of
his family have not been seen riding
around the National Capital in the
new car. 1t is limited that Mr.. Taft
likes fast travelling and that when
he rides out into the open country, he
does not always insist that the speed
of the car be kept within the legal
limits.
w. J. Urquhart, manager of the west
ern branch of the White Company, 239
Michigan Ave-, Chicago, ILL.,, said re-
Gently to a correspondent of this
paper: I'VE are receiving many in
quiries each day asking for full de-
tails regarding the construction of
Mr.. Taft's car and in reply we are
sending copies of our catalog. Mr..
Taft's car is exactly like any other
Model M 40 horsepower White
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
SISTERS TRICK
But 1t All Came Out Right.

How a sister played a trick that
brought rosy health to a coffee fiend is
an interesting tale:
Il was a coffee fiend--a trembling,
nervous, physical wreck, yet clinging
to the poison that stole away my
strength. Knocked at Postum and
would have gone Of it.
Zone day my sister substituted a
cup of Postum piping hot for my morn
ing cup Of coffee but did not tell me
what it was. I noticed the richness Of
1t and remarked that the coffee tasted
fine but my sister did not tell me
| was drinking Postum for fear ! might
not take any more.
"She kept the secret and Kept Civ
Ing me Postum instead Of coffee until
I grew stronger, more tireless, got a
better color in my sallow cheeks and
a clearness to my eyes, then she told
me Of the health-giving, nerve
strengthening ~life-saver she had given
me In place OF my morning coffee.
From that time I became a disciple Of
Postum and no words can do justice
in telling the good this cereal drink
did me. I will not try to tell 1t, for
only after having used 1t can one be
convinced OF its merits"
Ten days trial shows Postum's pow
er to rebuild what coffee has dc.
stroyed. There's a Reason
Look in pkgs. for the fancps little
book, The Road to MELVILLE"
Ever read tine above Ietter9 "A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true and full Of hutnnp
interest.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
TONGUE Twisters.

Tongue twisters are the actors
bane," an actor said. Lose your head
on the stage, and you are bound to
say Now Rababbas was a bobber,'
for 'Barabbas was a robber.'
"On a first night l heard a ~tragedian
refer to the Deity as "a showing leop-
ard when he meant "a loving shep-
herd
"You make me a boff and a sky
world l once shouted in a tank
drama.
I. my uncle, a divine, concluded an
address on the suffrage before a wom-
ems club with the terrible words: But
I bore you; / will cease; | do not wish
to address a lot Of berry wenches.'
My poor uncle meant weary benches
II was a duke in a recent problem
play, and when my servant asked me
one night IL l had any luggage, l re-
piled: Only two rags and a bug"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
For This Relief. Much Thanks

Whatever else Mr.. Taft may have
inherited from his predecessor, he
seems to have evaded the demons
legacy of Rooseveltian p~rolixity. The
length of presidential messages has
steadily increased through many years
until they have come to rival the six
best sellers in their unpruned luxuri-
ance. Napoleon said that he was con-
tent to go down to ~posterity with his
code in his hand. Should Mr.. Taft's
practice continue as it has begun, he
may take his place in the line of the
worlds great ones, grasping a single
sheet of typewriter paper contain
ing his first message to congress.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Democratic Policy the Right one.


The $500, 900, 900 a year which the
Payne bill is expected to turn into the
treasury should carry with it all the
protection that can reasonably be
asked. Surely it will restrict foreign
competition amply to cover the diff
ference between the American cost
and the foreign cost of making any
article that al be profitably manu-
featured in the United States.
Prohibitive tariff is neither in line
with sound finance nor with the de-
clared policy of the newly-seated
president. The Democratic purpose
to fight protective schedules only
when they are prohibitive and not
productive of venue will have, more
over, the support of millions of Re-
publicans in the northwest who are
as patriotic in their willingness to
contribute freely to the support of the
government as they are firm in op-
position to monopoly legislation.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
rhe strenuous Blanche.

One of Blanche Bates most intimate
friends is telling a rather funny story
about this clever actress.
"She came into my house n ever
ing very much excited, and l said to
her: Blanche, for heavens sake, what
Is the matter? You seem to be all
gone to pieces
Matter enough she answered, as
her voice shook with anger. I have
been accosted by a man in the
Streets
"'What did you do?' I asked.
"I hauled off and hit him in the
face she answered, and l said to
him: "You dirty dog, would you speak
to a defenseless woman?"'
"'And where was he when you said
this?' / again inquired.
Trolling. in the gutter where he
fell when I hit him. she said, in a
surprised tone at my question."-To-
ledo,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
TRUSTS TAKE HALF
THE REAL SITUATION IN AMERL
CA TO-DAY.
Farmers of the Country Consistently
Fleeced by Tariff Robbers
James J. Hill Not a Sound
Political Economist.

James ]. Hill, the railroad magnate,
says that American trusts will break
down of their own weight, and that
the chief problem before the American
people is to keep up the food supply.
This is equivalent to saying that
scientific agriculture will solve all u
industrial problems-that if we raise
enough wheat and flour we can allow
the trusts to plumber us at will until
they exhaust themselves. One can
not resist the conclusion that Mr..
Hills economic views are shallow. He
is a great railroad builder, and a poor
student of political economy.
Mr.. Hill admits that the tariff is the
mother of trusts but falls back on
the WORKOUT plea that tariff reduction
will strip the nations treasury. Isn't
1t strange that this western empire
builder should fail to preach national
economy, as he breaches it to his rail-
road subordinates, and to the western
farmers?
High tariff not only induces govern
ment extravagances, but increases in
dividual cost of living. Private and
public economy are the foundations of
national prosperity. A normal tariff
scientifically adjusted, will yield the
government ample revenue for legiti-
mate expenses. A depleted treasury
Is the favorite argument of ~standpat-
tiers, who scott at the idea of retrench-
ment in national expenditures.
But it is the individual foot that is
pinched most by the high tariff shoe.
How much better off is the western
farmer if he doubles his grain output
and finds the cost of living doubled
during the same period? Practically
this has been his experience in recent
years. The fruit of his labor and
skill must be divided with the robber
trusts.
Again, must the cost of living keep
on increasing until the trusts fall to
pieces through overreaching extor-
ton? Mr.. Hill seems to think so. The
preponderance of western American
sentiment is against this view. The
west believes that an artificial cost of
living can be broken down now by a
downward" revision of the tariff.
American agriculture may be des-
tined to play the chief part in feeding
the consuming world. That is no rea-
son why American farmers she uld be
fleeced by tariff robbers.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Judging by Size.

The Georgians of Augusta are chuck
ling over a new story about Mr.. Taft,
who drove out n afternoon to see a
Georgia planter. The planters cook,
a very old woman, takes no interest in
public affairs, and she did not recog-
nize the portly guest.
What did you think Of that gentle
man, Martha?" the planter asked, after
Mr.. Taft had driven off.
well, sir" old Martha replied, Il
can't say as | saw nothin' p~ertickler
about him, He looked to me like the
kind of man as would be pretty reg'ler
to his meals. "-Louisyille Times.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Taft's opnortunitv.

Possibly the strictest of the civil
service reformers would insist that
White House BARRIERS and messengers
shall be employed only after having
passed an examination designed to
test their efficiency, not as treasury
clerks or printers, but as BARRIERS and
messengers. But that point may well
be waived. The main thing is that the
business of transferring men, of re-
lieving them from duties which they
were hired to perform, ought to stop.
Here is a chance for reform which we
trust Mr.. Taft will not pass by.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

We presume there was no n so
simple as to suppose because the Re-
publicans promised an honest revision
of the tariff that that was the end Of
the question. 1t was only the begin
ming, and the event may be falsifica-
ton, as it was in the cas- Of the Dem.
ocratic promise under Cleveland. 1t
rests with the people to supply the
force that shall tur this strife to
the side Of honest revision or to let
1t go the old way Of a victory for spe-
cial privilege.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
His pax Of RECKONING.

AS the stout man whose appetite
had excited the envy of the other
boarders turned to leave the parlor.
he looked down at his waistcoat. Il
ds;safe, I've lost two buttons off my
vest" he said, ruefully.
He was a new boarder, but his land
lady saw no reason for further delay
in showing her banner "Watchfulness
and Economy for all" She gave him
the benefit Of the chill gaze SO famil-
lar to her older boarders.
ri think without doubt you will find
them both in the dining room," she
announced, clearly.-Youth's Compan'
inn
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
The secret OF success.

The motto of success was given in
this tale, told at a banquet:
A Swede among the miners in the
west was noted for always striking
pay dirt. His fellows thought that
there must be some secret to the I'M
usual success of the Swede and ques,
toned him as to how he always sue
ceeded in finding the spot where the
gold cropped out.
well, Ay don't know eff Ay can tell
anytang bout dat answered Ole. "Ay
only know dat Ay yust keep on dig.
gin'."-Milwaukee Free Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

"That is what / call an ideal mar.
rage" Hardy declared to his wife as
they were walking homeward after an
evening at the CAROLS. Actually,
l believe both think absolutely alike
Eyes, they are certainly charming"
asserted Mrs. Hardy; "bGt about
thinking, Joe, If you will notice, she
generally thinks first."-Youth's Com.
panion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Where the Tariff Hurts.

The law Of competition is the same
the world over. If Americans can
make better goods than are made
abroad, and have the additional ad-
vantage of transportation, they have
nothing to fear in most industries
from foreign competition. A scientific
tariff will find the real weak spots
and plug them up.
The present American tariff law is
not merely unscientiic and crude, but
is a direct instrument of oppression In
the hands Of robber trusts.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
A Modern Miracle.

Il caused the dumb to speak to-
day"
How was that?"
Il was stopped in the street by a
beggar with an I Am Deaf and Dumb
placard or his breast, and when l ex,
pressed the opinion that he was an i'm
poster he Immediately recovered his
speech and in vigorous Anglo-Saxon
requested me to go to-er-the place
that the new theology tells us doesn't
exist, and mind my own business and
Ned mind his!"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Hone sprlnas Eternal.

He was addressing a crowd n Sun
day morning ON the quay at Newcastle.
Il a safely say that no man ever
attempted to bribe me, gentlemen"
said the speaker.
Don't be down-hearted, old chap,
your luck may change" shouted a man
In the crowd.-Tit-Bits.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
More Than One.

A young fellow, whose better-hab
had just presented him with a pair of
bouncing twins, attended church one
Sunday.
During the discourse the clergyman
looked right out at ocr innocent friend
and said with thrilling %eloquence:
Young man, you have an important
responsibility thrust upon you"
The newly 1edged dad, %supposing
the preacher alluded to his peculiar
home event, considerably startled the
audience by exclaiming: Eyes, ! have
two Of em."-Liverpool Mercury.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Polite Interruptions.

"And it's awfully impolite to inter
rupt one who is talking, isn't it,
mother?"
Except when a woman is describ-
ing clothes, my dear, and then it is
polite to constantly calculate How
lovely!' or How ridiculous!' as the
case may be."-Kansas City Times.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Partners Ia his Crime.

The hard looking customer had been
arrested for stealing an umbrella.
What do you have to say for your
self" asked the police justice. Are
you guilty or not guilty."
I'm one O. the guilty ones, y'r hon
or, | reckon" answered the prisoner.
1.-THE umbrella had the name of ].
Thompson on the handle, G. H. Brick
ley stamped on the inside O the cover,
an I stole it from a man named Quinn
hv0
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Goes Into trust coffers.

Practically every American trust, in
Guiding those known as the robber va
riety-has grown up on protection"
The temporary crutch becomes a per-
manent staff, Worse still, it becomes
an instrument for extorting artificial
prices from consumers. The revenues
from these artificial prices flow direct
ly into the trust Golfers.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
lnnnortant to Eaothera.
Bears the
From Plutarch.

Neither rich furniture nor album
dance Of gold, nor a descent from an
illustrious family, nor greatness OF
authority, nor eloquence and all the
charms of speaking, can produce so
great a serenity of life as a mind free
from guilt, Kept untainted, not only
from actions, but purposes that are
wicked.-Plutarch
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

lasting cure, not
merely a temporary
benefit. Profit by
the example of
Rev. J. M. Suffield,
of 2179 S. Sth St.,
Lincoln, Nebr., who
confirms a report
Of his cure after
several years. II
told in a state
ment made for pub
LEGATION in 1900 how
Doan's Kidney Pills
had relieved me
after other rene
dies had failed"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

said Rev. Sufield. II have no hesita-
ton in confirming that statement now.
I have used Doan's Kidney Pills at
various times and they have never
failed me"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Pierpont Morgan's DAUGHTER has

J. Pierpont Morgan's daughter has
opened q restaurant in the Brooklyn
navy yard. If it is successful she
thinks the government will take it
over. If 1t is unsuccessful she a
get her father to hand it to the gov
eminent.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

The Payne bill as 1t stands pre-
sents many perpIexing problems, and
the tariff as finally enacted into law
is not likely to bear a recognizable re.
semblance to the original measure.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

Lewis Single Binder cigar-richest, most
satisfying smoke on the market. Your
dealer or Lewis Factory, Peoria, Ill.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
Give Him Time.

DO you cultivate the muses?"
"No-I'm a stranger in town, and
only know a few people. SO far"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
NOT A WEIGHT LITTER.

is the baby strong?"
well, rather! You know what a
tremendous voice he has?"
Eyes"
well, he lifts that five or six times
an hour"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
purIFuL SON.

"You young scamp! I've caught
you smoking my cigars!"
Yes, pa-er-er-you see | heard
ma say that you were smokin' your
self to death and ERIN tryin' to save
your life!"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

True friendship can afford true
knowledge. A want Of discernment
cannot be an ingredient in it.-Thor-
eau.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
rrx murine Eve Remedx

For Red, Weak, Weary, Watery Eyes.
Compounded by Experienced Physicians.
Conforms to the Pure Food and Drugs
Law. Murine Doesn't Smart. Soothes Eye
Pain. Try Murine for Your Eyes.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

And the west is heartily tired Of
trust-busting methods that bring no
practical results.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

When a man gives more than a dol.
lar to charity he usually manages to
get caught in the act.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
RerIIn Ruys MIR IN RuIk.

Berlin buys nearly all its milk lii
bulk, the bottled milk trade being in
significant But little sterilized milk
Ia sold
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

One way to remove paint is to sit
down on 1t before It Is dry.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

Remember you have once been
young, and never forget you may M
day be old.-Piggott.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

ONLY ONE "BROMo OUININE."
That is LAXATIVE BROMO QUININE. Look for
the signature Of II. W, GROVE. Used the World
over TO Cure a Cold in One Day. 25c.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

Dyspepsia and constipation are avoidable
miseries-take Garfield Tea, Natures Herb
laxative.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

It sometimes happens that a distant
relation is too close.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

Itch cured in 30 minutes by Woolford's
Sanitary Lotion. Never fails. AT druggists.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

Mrs. windows Soothing Syrup.
For children t~eething, softens the gums, reduces In
Illumination allays pain, cures wind collie. 25c bottle.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

From the blackmailer's viewpoint,
keeping secrets is a paying business.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08

The best thing to do when you catch
a cold Is to let 60 of 1t.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-04-08
MUST BELIEVE IT.
Every Reader Will Concede the Truth
of This Statement.

One who suffers with backache or
any form of kidney trouble wants a
The Washington times., 1909-06-29

Employed to clean the automobile of
Dr.. George E. Patton. 3427 Fourteenth
street northwest, Chesterfield Jenkins
decided to test the machine in Joy
ride" about the city.
During the progress OF this ride he
co'lided with a lamppost at Fourteenth
street and Virginia avenue southeast,
and also coliided with ordinances of the
city government. He was In Judge
KimbalTs court this morning charged
on three counts with taking property
without the consent OF the owner, col
liding. and being an unlicensed chauf-
feur.
Judge RImbaIl sent the young colored
boy to jail for number OF months
to pay for his fun.
DR.. Patton employed Jenkins for
few hours work on the automobile. Tho
next Tins II was seen or heard from
II was smashing a lamp post in the
southeast section. officer Varied saw
the mishap, and soon discovered that
Jenkins had no right to the machine.
The Washington times., 1909-06-29
BUILDING PERMITS.

The following building permits wers
issued today;
To John H. Binsted. for one two-story
frame dwelling IN Sherier street. near
Edmonds place northwest; architect and
builder, John II. Binstead: estimated
cost. $1,000.
To G. ". Barkman, for two two
story brick dwellings from s0l TO s0s
b street northeast. architect, A H.
Beers: builder. G.. W. Barkman: est
mated cost So
To S. w. Woodward for one sever
story brick apartment house at 2S01 Ash
mead place; architects, Harding g. Up.
man: builder. S. II. Edmonston; esti-
mated cost. $4,000.
To C. ". Barkman, for two two-story
brick dwellings from 11s TO 121 Ninth
street southeast; architect, A II. Beers;
builder. G. w. BarlSman; estimated
cost. 5000
To A. ~. Lukei, for eight three-story
brick and stone dwellings from 1712 to
1T26 Kibourne place northwest: archi-
tect and builder. r. F. Lukei; estimated
cost. $4,000.
To ]. ". Caughey, for two two-story
brick dwellings from 2422 TO 2424 Seven
teenth street northwest. architect, n. r.
Grimm; builder. John ". Caughey; esti-
mated cost. S25, 900.
The Washington times., 1909-06-29
REALTY TRANSFERS.

Woodbridge Nancy L Campbell, ct
vir, Robert A, 20 Janet L Toroort, lot
3, block 10, SO.
G street northwest between Twenty
second and Twenty-third streets-Ellen
Rupert TO Gustav Rupert, parts orig1-
nal lots Z and s. square 81, $40.
SIS Fourteenth street northwestern
bert A. Clark ct ux. to Allen G. Clark,
henry P. Blair, and William II. Rap
ley, trustees, lot 30, square 600, SO
40 II street northwest 1907 Fourth
street northwest, and Third street
northwest, between q and r streets
Katharine Miller TO Catherine A. Mil
Ter, lot 8, square DIS, and lots %, 36, 81,
g. sQuare $50, SO
A street northeast, between Fifteenth
and Sixteenth streets-John c. Deich-
mann ct ux 10 Clarence f and Annette
I. Keefe. lot Is square 100, $40
Observation-Disclosures NJ. Hall ct TX. TO
James MacFarquhar, lot s., block ?
$40 Same 10 HCu1er 2. Selnlan, lot SO,
Eighteenth street northeast, between
A and B streets-William G. II. Davis
to William o. Berryman, south half lot
8. square 1l0S 500.
Mt. pleasant and Pleasant Plains
Isottie l. Burn ct vir. James D, 10
Burr r. Tracy, lots IS, So. 80, square
2S45, SO.
Twentieth street northwest between
I. and K streets-Burr +. Tracy ct ux.
10 James D. Burn, part original lot g.,
NJ street northwest between IWelItn
and Thirteenth strcCss-E. Lulie Smith
ct vir, RexfOrd NJ. to Daniel w. Prem
tiss, part Original lot 2. square Isl, $40.
Widows Mite ano Kalorama Heights
Laura V French to William II. Lynn,
lots q, "a 3, 81, 30, 30, Widows Mite. and
lots II. Is, "A. block *, Kalorama
Heights, so.
Whitney CIose-BfiddaugF & Shannon.
Inc. to Eudora NJ. hampton, lot p.
Peffwoirth~Andrew ". Lukei ct ux.
to Frederick J. and Jennie V. Zotel, lot
So, square 3130: SO.
PetwOrth-Cuy S. Zepp ct al. to Peter
F. and Edith NJ Hon. lot Is, square 20;
SO.
Widows Mite & Kalorama Heights
Elizabeth J. Somers to Laura V. French.
lots q. "a. p. 81, 81. % Widows Mite
and lots u, 10. IA, block Is; SO