The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-02-15
SHANGHAIED With HIS
OWN ANXIOUS CONSENT
How One Unfortunate Dodged the Passport
Law and Made His Getaway
From Honolulu.

little matter as soon as they got home.
"Anyhow, that was the Hawaiian
law when I was there, and that is the
law yet, / m told. It doesn't make
any difference that you may not have
one chance in eight million to borrow,
or earn, or steal, or somehow annex the
money to pay up what you owe. In
Hawaii YOU stick until YOU pay, and
the Hawaiian authorities are right on
the situation of seeing that you don It
execute any elopement with yourself
until you are in shape to present re-
ceipfed bills for every piece of eight
of your Indebtedness to anybody in
| Hawaii.
'fYou know my weakness-iee ma
chimes. I started an ice machine in
| Honolulu, and I'd no sooner got it GO
| ing like a barbecue bonfire, and be-
| ginning to pull down interest on the
| investment, than they put the steamer
| Australia on regular bimonthly run
| between San Francisco and Honolulu,
and every time the Australia drew
into Honolulu harbor she carried four
| thousand tons of manufactured ice
| that could be, and Immediately was,
sold for fifty cents a hundres less than
the actual price it cost me to make
/ ice. The Honolulans weren't going to
| take ice from me because I shaved
every morning and kept my nails
! trimmed, when they could buy it at
less than half the cost from the steam
| ship people. And that's how I came
to be marooned in Honolulu.
'sAfter dismantling my plant and
dickering with the Kanaka junkman
for my machinery, I found myself a
hard two thousand on the wrong side
| of the balance sheet Meaning by that,
that I owed four or five Hawaiian mer-
chants, and all of them, as it happen
ed, fiint-faces, two thousand metallic
| men.
81 sought these creditors out, group
| ed them together in lovely pavilion
on Waikiki Beach, touched the button,
assuaged their thirsts, and then staked
them to some very engaging converse
ton, to the general essence that I
thought I'd run right up to the States
on the next steamer, and get the money
i / owed them, and send it back by
i return steamer, and all would be we'll
er than a well-digger-hal ha! I
laughed joyously, clapping them each
and severally on the back, just like
that
"Could they see a joker Not no
ticeably; not, in fact, so that it could
q be noticed through binocular as big
as thirteen-inch gun. They assuaged
their thirsts all that / desired them to,
and lay back in their wicker chairs,
and listened quite calmly to my merry
quirks and outlets But when I came
to that pivotal observation about how
/ thought I'd just run up to the Unit
ed States, and all like that, they all.
each and several, leaned forward in
their wicker. chairs and told me that
they thought otherwise. [ required of
them what they meant. although |
knew. They related right back that
, my only chance on earth of ever again
seeing me own. me native land, was to
come across, sooner or later, with the
two thousand and odd dollarets that
owed them individually and co1lec
, lively.
Whereupon, becoming peeved, ]
ceased pushing the button for them
{ and we dispersed with negotiations not
: concluded, but Just about two thou
sand dollars worth in allegiance.
e "They entered suit against me the
next morning, got judgments while
f they waited, served the same on me
r and were rewarded with peek at ny
n pockets turned inside out, whereupo1
: they turned the judgments over to til,
t Honolulan authorities who see to i
g that debtors cleave unto the Hawaiian
soil until their debts aye discharged
(, unto the uttermost sou marque.
|. ''I didn It know the Honolulu folk
t in a business way well enough to ta
e at their office doors and request then
d to slip me, just for little while b.
t way of loan, the piffling matter o
I two thousand dollars l am not deny
ing that, socially, in Honolulu, l wa
l. a furore and a knockout, not to sa
it riot; but the gay butterfly thin
G doesn' t help You a whole lot when
RI heaves along time for you to vamp on
D. onto the business firing line and ge
S, yourself something.
h HAnother bad thread of it was tina
Il il being the hard times year of 81
l. there was no chance for me to make
T. temporary two thousand win by sendin
lie bunch of sad, slow music letters I
n friends in the States, informing thel
n of my marooned state, and implorin
a, them to remit if they didn t want I
It. hear of my perishing of a surfeit {
a. Pearl Harbor houseboat parties.
he '93, like 1908, every fellow in Il
Oh United States who had a two-doll;
an note was carrying it in his shoe al
ay going to bed with his shoes on; and
or ] wasn't idiotic enough to expect tn
| could do any good by the corr
ne snondence method.
lu, (Which brought it all down to o,
Ter blunt nuh: a personally conduct
pc elopement by and with myself fro
To- Honolulu if the cards could be shr
all fled around to read that way.
ty "Now. there never was any d
ng grace attached to the departure of
in debtor from Honolulu. He wasr
if looked upon as a criminal, or even
ha- bad actor, when he was in the thrc
ere of trying to break out of Hawaii.
lis was considered as sort of little gan
and a kind of little joke besid
na When YOU re 4 debtor in Hono1u
on anxious to fee those sapphire wat'
,ou for the purpose of trying for st;
in somewhere else. the only Honolulu
for who are ag in you are the folks Y