davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16
Do Women Like Food?

The "nicer" a woman the less she eats
and the less she cares about eating. 1t
is a sound masculine rule to beware OF
women who really relish good dinner.
who can order and eat it in tirstclass
restaurant without mental disquietude,
and who can say offhand what liqueur
should follow a meal that had been
grouped around, had led up to, and had
deployed from bottle or SO of Some
body's 1900. mean it is sound mas
culine rule to beware of choosing q
wife from among them. They may be
capital dinner companions, but they
will make poor wives. Somewhere
about them will be found strain of
greediness and extravagance not far
below the average males. And that is
fatal except in a millionaire's house.
hold. The proper order of things is
that women should cater and men en-
joy. There have been no great women
cooks and no great women writers on
cookery-for the same reason that
brings all diet reformers sooner or later
to grief on the obstinate rock of femi-
nine immobiIity.-Harper's Bazaar.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16

ed, but after deep reflection it was re-
membered that on the night of the
robbery terrific storm broke forth just
as the robbers were leaving the house
and for fear they might be identified as
the flashes of lightning revealed their
manly forms they evidently tire " their
plumber under the porch so that they
might not be caught with the goods.
Not only that, but they had evidently
robbed other ladies' boudoirs, where
small amounts of jewelry valued at
anywhere from ten thousand to fifty
thousand dollars were lying around
loose on chiffoniers and bureaus-thus
making it easy in few hours to gather
in jewels to the value of thirty thousand
dollars-only to he thrown under a
porch and to be scratched up later by
an old hen-to surprise its owner.
A Southern Minnesota farmer used
to take one of his best hens with him
whenever he drove to the village. The
hen would sit up in the seat with him
and when noon came she would lay a
fresh egg for him for luncheon. The
reason the farmer took the hen along
was because she would pick up the
grain that fell out of the horses feed
bags. Thus he skilled two stones with
one bird" (Of course the gentle read
er will say the above quotation is
wrong. Any one might "kilI two birds
with one stone," but it is not every one
who can kill two stones with one bird.)
The old man saved chicken feed and in
grateful appreciation thereof the hen
laid fresh egg for the old man.
A farmer in the Red River Valley
who owned a large number of hens had
one in particular Of which he was very
fond and he used to play with it. One
day while "fooling" with this particular
hen he had an old one-doIlar goldpiece
in his hand. The hen swallowed it
promptly and shambled off. The first
impulse of the old man was to kill the
hen and extract the goldpiece, but he
concluded he would let nature take its
course and await events-as, of course,
as heretofore stated, he was very fond
of this particular hen. The next morn
ing ha went out to the hennery to gath
er up the eggs and crux criticorum,
ante tubam trepidat, including few
other Latin quotations, he found two
twenty dollar gOldpieces under the part
of the hen that usually goes over the
fence last. "Aha," thought the thrifty
son of toll. "This is the kind of farm
ing that pays. I'll go to town, gather
up some more one-dollar goldpieces,
feed them to the hens and beat the
government mint making money" He
could not find any dollar goldpieces so
he had few flyers cut up into small
pieces and fed those to the hens, ex-
pecting twenty-dollar goldpieces in re-
turn-but after feeding the golden
splinters to the favorites of his hennery
he found next morning they were all
dead.
The two twenty-dollar goldpieces
which he had previously found had evil
IDENTIFY been dropped in the hennery by
some neighboring chicken thief who
became frightened or lost the coins of
the realm out of his pocket in STOPPING
down to get in or out.
And that will be about all on the SUBJ
ject of hens at this time.
UNCLE.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16
Decoy Eggs.

John, aged six, was sent to the chick
en-coop for some eggs. He soon re-
turned with the report:
"There amt no eggs IN the nests at
all, 'cept the ones they copies FROM
The Delineator.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16
First Annual
Meeting
Of the Who Who's of the MinneSo.
ia State Prison and How
it Wound Up.

The first meeting OF the local ColeO-
rity Club was held here sometime ago
but representatives of the press were
barred. By dint of great labor stem
ographic copy of the record of the pro-
ceedings was obtained from resident
shorthand man who carved it on his
cuff, which, when it was sent to the
laundry, exploded, ssending the dots,
dashes, circles, pothooks and suchllke
over to The Mirror Office, where, after
considerable confusation and confabu-
lation, they were finally transcribed
and here they are:
Meeting called to order by 81 Has
keIl, who read the call which was as
follows:
"Those interested in the propagation
and scatteration of social seeds of kind
ness and whose names have figured in
the Who's Who Almanac of this in
stitution are invited to assemble for
the purpose of forming closer and
more compact union of kindred spirits
where band of brothers may be duly
organized into more fraternal union,
enabling it's members to stand closer
together, shoulder to shoulder, elbow
to elbow, to the end that what may
benefit one may be of equal. beneft to
ali.'
81 am pleased to see such large
number of local notables present." said
Mr.. Haskell. "The first thing in order
will be the election of temporary
President What is your pleasure,
gentlemen?"
Uncle John-Mr. Chairman, ! rise
I riz-I mean l stand up to blaze in
nominashun dot grand Cit mean
excuse mel nominashunate for Bresi-
dent dot glorious-I mean l blaze in
de nominashun box de name Of
Duke of Oxford-Name him-name
him.
Uncle John-Everybody please vote
for der Tribune of de Elect for Bresi-
dent.
Mistah Ford-Another administra-
ton job.
Handy Andy-Shiver me timbersl
Chairman-The Tribune of the Elect
is nominated for temporary President
{QuickIy) Do hear second?
Heliograms-I second the nomina
ton, Your Honor-I mean Y our High
ness. No, what do 1 mean? Your
Worship.
Young Steady-I-
The Chairman-(very quickly Hear
ing no other nominations declare tht
same closed. ALI in favor of the cleo
ton of the Tribune of the Elect pie lst
manifest same by raising your RICH
hands. 1.-TWO hands upl The Tribune
of the Elect has been chosen unani
mously and 1 appoint the following
committee to escort your Temporal.
President to the chair: Uncle John
Rock Candy Kid and King Menelik
A voice-A sandwich committee.
Another voice-Everything is fai
while it goes our way.
Chairman-1t is my proud and price
less privilege to present to you you
temporary President-the Tribune o
the Elect. [Great stampture anon
the members of the administrator
wing.l
The Observation-Disclosures
you, gentlemen, I-I-I-say, 1 thank 20
for the great honor you have conferre
upon me in electing me to this exalte
position. But before proceeding t
Ackermoney-Ain't he peach?
Prof. Webb-He's the cocoa, all RICH
ell right.
The Barber of the Mild Blue Eyes
He's the picked peppers, you betch;
Ball-He's the raisins.
The Tribune-Gentlemen, I-I-har'
ily know how to receive your compl
ments-
King Menelik-Mr. President, I ri
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16
Duke of Oxford-To fill space

Duke of Oxford-To fill space
Handy Andy--And see if some plan
cannot be devised to rush the growler
for the printers.
The Tribune-(n despair)-Gentle-
gentlemen-we shall never
Porfirio Alexio Gonzolio-Mr. Presi-
dent, pardon me, sir, but with the kind
indulgence of Your Most Excellent
Eminence 1 would like to say [ heard
compatriot say something sometime
ago about can-opener. No doubt you
are all aware l am from the last. but l
trust [ may say not the least, lustrous
star added to the constellation OF the
Union-POrto Rico.
Mr.. R. L.-Hooray! that's a peach.
Smoke up!
Heiiograms-AndI presume the only
use you have for can-opener is to get
at some eye-opeDer.
Shoe Shop MISUNDERSTANDING
yoi! Oy yoi!
D. M.-Would it not be well, Mr..
President, to take the cotton out of
that fellows ears and stuff it down his
throatp l came here, sir, to-
Heliograms-See brotherly union
organized among lot of knockers.
Spellovitchky-But the chief knocker
is not present.
The Tribune-All the knockers were
supposed to be here. That's what we
are here for. to cement them into a
band of brothers. But confess 1871
am unable to make any progress as
your presiding officer
ST Haskell-Perhaps in rounding up
the knockers and spear throwers some
of them were overlooked. God pity us
all if that is so.
King Menelik-Mistah President
there's another point of order that has
just popped into my befuddled foozle-
tank and want to explode it before it
gets away, sub.
The Tribune-(languidly) State your
point of order.
King Menelik-It's no chop suey OF
short order, sub, nosuh. My point is
this: How about the grades in this so.
ciety, sub? am a second-termer, you
know, sub, and it is the unwritten Law
among us, sub, that frst-termers have
no license to commingIe, coagulate
amalgamate or coagitate with second.
termers.
Prof. Webb-Y assah, y-a-a-h! And
how about lOng-timers and short
timers? That's another point for Hi
Excellency, King Menelik, the cham
peen of the peepul-the chocolate cream
de la cream.
Mistah Ford-I move we adjourn o.
we'll nevah get through until we NEE
Marse Peter at the Gate.
Erid-I object to gag rule.
| The Tribune-A motion to adjourn
is always in order and not debatabIe
but We are met
King Menelik-And Mistah Presi
dent, my next point of order is
i Here the remaining notes flew out o
the window, but as they we're on tn
wing this sentence was made out:
"Officer Goldsmith appeared upon tn
scene and the members were escorte,
to the bathroom TO clean up for anothe
try at getting rid of the knockers
spear throwers and javelin twisters
Adjourned to knock again."
JUDGE EAGAN.
N. B.-Dialogue quotation marks ar
f Intentionally omitted to create ney
, style.
: AUTHOR.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16

Moralist: "Hell is paved with good
Intentions" Politician: "Who got the
contract ?"-Judge.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-09-16

"Did his widow succeed in breaking
his will" "Yes; long before he died."
City Journal.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

hanging in clusters, being represented
In colored electric lights. The border
of the garden was laid in smilax and
different colored chryanthemums. One
Of the most beautiful features of the
decorations was the flowers, of which
there was the greatest profusion Of
roses. carnations and chrysanthe-
NUNS Of all colors. Brass lamp posts
with miniature lights made the gar
den bright. Two stars of red and blue
were planted on the slope of the gar
den and beds of different cOlored
flowers in the shape OF stars and flags
were outlined. Bronze statuary was
used to excellent effect, and miniature
trees and shubbery heightened the
naturalness of the setting. Everything
was in miniature. Of course. On the
tables. on the walls, everywhere, flow
ers were in evidence, the chrysanthe-
NUNS being especially bautiful.
Houttoniers of red and white carna-
tions were at each plate. The walls
were covered with large and hand
some flags
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10
EXAMINATION FOR ANNAPOLIS

Columbia. Nov. 5.-Senator Tillmail
has received the following announce
ment in regard to the competitive ex-
animation for two cadetships at the
United States naval academy, which
was held in Columbia on November 1
under the direction of State Superin-
tendent of Education Swearingen.
The examination was held and the pa
pers graded by a committee consist
ing Of PrOfs. S. H. Edmunds, A. r.
Banks. and j. B. Coleman. The young
men were examined by number and
when the committee completed its
work. Mr. Swearingen opened the en-
velopes inclosing the numbers and
names and this is the result:
No. 13-Charles Franklin Martin,
College Of Charleston, Charleston, first
principal. grade 80 S-15.
No. 26.-Wallace Prior, Clemson
college, first alternate. grade 73 14-15.
No. s.--w. NJ. Nichols. Spartanburg
second alternate, grade 50 els.
No. BIB. M. English. Jr., Colum.
bia. route No. 3, third alternate, grade
So 1-5.
No. 10.-F. H. All, Clemson college,
fourth alternate. grade so 1-3.
No. ST. D. Ruddock, Jr.. 81
Pinckney street, Charleston, second
principal, grade 81 Ais.
No. 17.-William Forgarty, 80
Broad street. Charleston, first alter
nate, grade II l-S.
No. 2.-Thomas S. Marshall, Glenn
son college, second alternate, grade 7s.
No. 30.-C. e. DesChamps, Sumter,
third alternate. grade 6S 1-5.
No. 25.-William J. Carter. Jr., Dill
lon. fourth alternate, grade AZ.
The appointment blanks giving the
two principals and six alternates the
right to appear before the civil service
board for examination next April will
be filled out in the near future and
mailed to the navy department I'm ac-
cOrdance with the law and the re.
spective appOintees will be notified Of
their nomination with the necessary
authority to appear for examination.
The men who have won the APP
pointments will have almost six
months in which to study and further
improve themselves and the examina-
tion is very rigid.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10
COTTON CROP SHORT.
j. A. Taylor Eestimates Yield at Less
Than 10000, 900 Bales.

Memphis, enn., Nov. 5.-J. A. Tay-
lor. president Of the National Gin
ners association, today issued the fol-
lowing bulletin:
Complete returns INDICATE a max
imum crop of s,7sO,0O0 bales, not in
Guiding linters or repacks. Minimum
figures 9,7S0,000.
The heavy falling off is over the
belt except in Georgia and the Car
olinas, where there is about as good a
crop as last year on a little smaller
acreage.
Maximum report by States: Ala
bama $4,000; Arkansas GA, 900; Flor
ida $4,000; Georgia 100000: Louis
lana $4,000; Mississippi s5s, 200; ms
souri, and Virginia $4,000; North Car
olina S4S.o00; Oklahoma $4,000:
South Carolina 1.lss,oOO; Tennessee
25S,oOo; Texas 2,3os,Ooo. Total
9.7SO.O0o.
THE ginners say the small yield
is largely due to the smallness of bolls
and low yield Of lint. AS the crop fs
SO near ginned, We will probably not
make our December estimate"
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10
High school Nstes.

Mr.. o. b. Hutson. who has filled
very accsptsbly the position of teach
sr II the high school and commandant
at Cadets. has resigned to accept q
position elsewhere. In q different kind
of work. He made no request to be
released until he had secured the pro-
saiSs of suitable successor. He will
be succeeded by Mr.. w. NJ. Scott, who
served In this capacity last year with
such eminent satisfaction to all. Mr.
Hutson made many friends while here
and his work as teacher and COM
mandant was highly acceptable. Mr.
Scott feels perfectly at home in his
cid position.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

Coroner Flowers held an inquest
Thursday Afternoon In Privateer town
ship near Mr.. JOS. Richards of that
place. over the body OF John Benbow.
q negro. who was found dead In his
bed Wednesday night. Benbow had
been suffering with organic heart dis
ease for a year or more and there was
no reason TO suspect that his death
was due To other than natural causes.
but the negroes OF the neighborhood
asked for an inquest and Coroner
Towers was summoned. When hs ar
rivcd he made thorough investiga-
tion and Dr. Green made post
m0rtcn examination. DIR. Green stated
tia. death wes due To heart dis "a ~
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10
POSTAL LOSS $1s,47s.7zO.
Over $640,0OO,O8O In Cash Sent
Abroad I'm 90 Years

Washington, Nov. "a postal de-
ficiency Of s17,47s,77o, an increase of
$569,4s1 over last year. was announc-
ed in the annual report Of Merritt o.
Chance. auditor of the postofice de-
partment made public today. The
audited revenues for the fiscal year
ended June 80 last, amounted to S203.-
5S2.3s3, an increase of 6.31 per cent.
over the preceding year. The audited
expenditures increased e.07 per cent.
including losses by fire, burglary, etc.
There wre 6.700 additional post
offices authorized to issue money or
ders. In round numbers $1,oSs,00o,-
600 represents the value Of the IT,
479,40s issued and 7o,503,45s paid do
mestic money and international mon
ey orders with the fees prescribed by
law.
Compared with the volume Of do.
mestic money order business. in 1890
the number Of Offices increased 77per
cent, the number Of orders 1873 per
cent. and value Of orders 1876 per cent
There have been over $e40, 100000 in
money orders sent 20 foreign countries
during the past 20 years. About 80
per cent. of that sum found lodgment
in Austria. Great Britain, Hungary.
Italy. Norway and Russia and was evil
IDENTIFY the surplus earnings of foreign
labor employed in the United States.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

am pleased to announce to my
customers and the public generally
that ] am again installed In my Dem
tai Office. which has been closed for
several weeks on account OF remodel
ling the Osteen Building.
My office has been entirely refitted
and 1 am prepared to serve my Gus
toners with more comfort and salts
faction, both to them and myself.
N. G.. OSTEEN, JR, d. d. S.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

Among those who went to Columbia
Friday to attend the Fair were:
Misses Hlnda and Kaytie Manhein,
Mr.. and Mrs. Deveaux Moore, Mr.. and
Mrs. w. Y. shaw and son william. Mr..
G. Richardson. Mr.. L. I. Parrott. Mis-
ses Mabel and Hassie Parrott. Mr.. and
Mrs. Geo. w. Hutchison. Mrs. s. W.
stubbs. Mrs. c. l. stubbs. Mrs. C. f.
stubbs. Miss Pauline woodley. Mr..
Willie Brooks stuckey. Bill Dunno.
Mr.. Willie Bultman.
Mr.. Frank O'Donneli went to Char
lesion Friday morning.
Mr.. Ben r. Mcleod. of Clio, was In
the city Thursday night
Mrs Eugene Hogan has returne
from an extended visit to friends ai,i
relatives at White Plains. Ala.
Mrs. Mamie Feweil. of Rock Hill.
Is visiting her mother, Mrs. II. I. Din
kins.
Mr.. and Mrs. Louis LaBrpce and
children. of Plantersville. have been
visiting Mrs. LaBruce's parents, Mr.
and Mrs. John 8. Richardson.
Misses Elizabeth. Martha and Mary
Wilson attended the State Ball.
Mr.. and Mrs. John B. Miller, who
have been visiting relatives here for
the past theree weeks. left Friday
ternoon for their home In Washing
ton. ID. c.
Mr.. and Mrs. T. z. White and Miss
Marion Heaner. spent Thursday In Co.
lumbia.
Mr.. and Mrs. J. H. Dorrity attended
tho fair In Columbia Thursday.
Mr.. and Mrs. C. w. McGrew went to
Columbia Thursday.
Nra p. o. Leak spent Thursday in
Columbia.
Miss Florence Elliott has returned
from visit I'd her brother at Peters
burg. Va.
Miss Edith DeLorme. Miss Alice
Moses and Mrs 8. c. Baker left
; Tuesday morning for Greenwood to
attend the annual Convention of the
Daughters Of tho Revolution.
Mr.. w. 8. Schumacher left on Sat-
urday for his old home In Arkansas.
having been called there by the scri-
Gus illness Of his mother.
Miss Ialla Arial. IL visiting her
aunt. Mry. w. s. Reynolds.
Mr.. While Bostick and Miss Kath-
ieen Bostick left on Saturday for
Pickens to attend the Richey-
AcKasen wedding on Tuesday.
Mr.. Hubert McKagen left on Sat-
urday for Pckens. where ne was
married to Miss Ola Belle Richey on
Tuesday.
Misses Ella aud Eliza Orr. of Hen
dersonville. are visiting relatives In
the city.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. o. Hoyt returned
TO Denmark Saturday. after q few
days visit to Mr.. and Mrs. HI. A.
Hoyt.
Miss Viva Randle. who is attend
ine winthrop College spent Sunday
with her parents. Mr.. and Mrs. NJ. B.
handle.
Miss Louise Murray. Of Columbia.
srent sunday In the city. "
Miss Pet Wilson. Of Manning. spent
Monday In the city.
Mr.. and Mra Walter Renneker. OF
Charleston. spent Sunday In the city.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10
Big Potatoes.

Il. Il. Bruner Of Oswego, an indus
trOuS and successful colored farmer
who raises other crops beside cotton
was in town Friday with load Of fine
Vineless yams for sale, and brought
the editor n sample in the shape of
two potatoes that weighed nearly five
pounds each.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

CABBAGE PLANTS FOR SALE
L have about $4,000 Charleston
Wakefield cabbage plants, grown in
the open air, for sale. This is the
season to transplant for early
spring heading. f.. s. Miller. at
Folsom's Jewelry Store.
11-6-6t lit w
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

FOR SALE-Three nice gifts left, one
pure bred Bershire and two with
trace of Poland China. Two or
three cows will be fresh i'm milk la
ter. Several undressed sleep skins
at dollar each; about that value
In wool on them. After washing,
fine for bottom of buggy or bedside.
Goat skins soc. +. w. Dabbs. Mayes-
vile, :. G., Nov. 4th.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

The cotton crop in 1908, was H.
5S1,S29 bales, while in 1907 the yield
was 13,550,76O.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

'Tis the mind that makes the body
rich--Shakespeare.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

FOR SALE-The Mcleod place, 25s
l-2 acres. fine Wateree River
swamp, cotton and grain land, near
X. II. depot. ]. r. Sumter, Sum-
ter, :. c. 10-12-tt
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

They who forgive most shall bc
most forgiven.-Bailey.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

Send us your job work.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1909-11-10

send US your job work.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-02-25
ASSEMBLY MEMBERS CONVINCED
RADICAL sHAkE.uP 10
INEVITABLE.
MAY ELIMINATE CONTRACTS
Report Of Senate Committee, Expected
to Condemn Sanitary Conditions,
Probably viii signal Gen.
eraI Reform Move.

Jefferson City.-It being a fOregonc
| on %pcnitcntiary and reform school will
| condemn the sanitary condition Of the
| Missouri ~penitcntiary, and that the
| special senate committee appointed at
the last session Of the Legislature TO
visit prisons In other states with a
| view 10 suggesting improvements In
| prison management at home, will rec
Ornmcnd very extensive changes. prac'
| tically evenly member Of the legisla-
| lure and every state officer feels that
q radical chang is near At hand.
The special senate committee that
| visited prnitrn,iarics during the recess
is composed OF Senators McI)avid OF
| Greene, Bradley OF 81. Francois and
Eads Of Dayiess. institutions In New
York. Massachusetts. Ohio and iii.
nOis were visited.
The committee returned under the
impression there IL not a single re-
| formatory feature worthy Of the name
! connected with the Missouri prison,
aud that every prison visited is vastly
superior to /, IN a great many impor-
tant respects.
Senator McDavid says he will do cv'
crytbing in his power TO introduce new
and modern methods in the Missouri
institution. He opposes the contract
labor system.
Senator Bradley IL more O%utspoken
than Senator McDayid. The presence
Of 80 much tuberculosis, he thinks, Is
q lasting disgrace TO The state. lie
believes all OF the old cell buildings
should be TORI down. The contract
system Of working convicts IL intOlcr.
able TO him.
In a general way. Senator Eads quite
agrees with the other members Of the
committee in III" opinion that Missouri
ia far behind other states where mod,
Crn prison methods have been adopted
He also would abolish the contract
system.
II Is expected this special committee
will submit "a report at an early date,
perhaps the last of tn" present week,
and this will he n signal for "A general
move for prison reform In Missouri
II seems Impossible that the contract
system "a be continued In view OF
n much hostility towards IT.