davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Lone MINDED Preachers

Dean LEROY who expressed the
opinion that ten minutes is long
enough for 1 sermon. would have met
with scant sympathy from some di-
vines Of past centuries. says the West
minister Gazette.
Thomas Hooker considered three
hours 1 fair average allowance for .
sermon. though. on one occasion. when
he was i'll he let his congregation of
more lightly. Pausing at the end Of
fifteen nl:nuteS. he rested awhile and
then continued his honlily for two
hours longer. Cranner's sermons werc
each small book when set up in type.
and Baxter. Knox. Bunyan and Calvin
rarely reached Lastly. my brethren. y
under two hours.
George Herbert once said: The par
son exceeds not an hour in preaching,
because all ages have thought that j
competence but a certain rector Of
BilDury, Gloucestershire. was Of an
other opinion. for he never sat down
under TWO hours. The squire, We
learn, usually withdrew after the text
was announced. smoked his pipe out
side and returned for the blessing.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
a STUDY In Anatony,

The brain is the headquarters Of the
nervous system and contains the cen
trail Offices Of the Anatomical Tele-
pho1e company.
When the suburban nerve center
says. Hello. central" the brain either
replies What number" or Busy" or
"Oupof order" as the case may be.
Sometimes the wires arc crossed and
the company fails to declare any divi-
dends. thus placing the entire brain ii
the hands Of 4 receiver.
From the brain issues the spine.
which is sometimes useful in rlatrimo-
ny, although rarely strong enough in
man for practical purposes and con-
stantly growing weaker the longer he
is married.
On top Of the head the hair grows,
or is supposed to. In some cases, how
ever, it fails TO grow despite the most
painstaking efforts
In ladies there are two kinds Of hair.
viz. the imported and domestic. II
gentlemen also two kinds-namely.
permanent and transient. The perma-
nent is seen in wild men. the transient
in civilized men when young.
At one time all the hairs We're care
fully numbered, but the practice has
been discontinued owing to great pres
sure Of other matters.-L;ppincott's.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Direct Answers

The negroes Of Africa are simple and
direct in speech. 1t never occurs to
them, writes Mr. L. H Milligan in
The jungle Folk In Africa" that the
purpose OF language is to conceal
thought, and to conniserate the Afri-
can for his color is waste of SYM
pathy IL illustration of this Mr.. Mil
ligan gives an amusing conversation
with one Of his pupils. One day when
I was talking to Bojedi something in
the course Of the conversation prompt
ed me to ask him whether. he would
like to be L white man. he replied
respectfully but emphatically in the
negative. l wished to know his req
son He hesitated to tell me, but /
was insistent, and 1T iasi he replied:
We'll. We think that ve are better
looking"
gasped when I thought of the vast
" i'll looking faces I had seen in the
jung!es. and i'll apology for myself
said:
But you have not seen US in our
own country, where there is 10 ma
laria and where We are not yellow and
green
He quietly asked what color we were
in our own country, to which l prompt
II replied, Pink and white
Looking 1T me steadily for q mo-
ment. he remarked:
Mr.. MilliGan. if should see you in
your own country I don't believe I
should know you"
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
4 Gale by Another Name.

Doubtless there were many puzzled
readers when deep sea skipper rolled
into this barbor a,few days ago and
reported that his ship had been be-
lated by gale which had piped up to
force TO-" Force TO-" it was ex-
planned, meant something like hurri-
cane. It is 4 term borrowed from the
Beaufort scale. scheme Of wind
measurements devised by the british
admiral Beaufort before the us OF
ocean going steam. Force l was q
calm, force : q light breeze, and so on
up to the hurricane velocity. Perhaps,
too, the Beaufort scale may give q
clew to those who have been wonder
ing for some time at the title Of q
popular German picture. 1t is just one
expanse Of frowning cloud and storm
tossed billow, and tie artist has named
it ..vindstarke 10, 11."-New York Sun.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Wills and Edmund kcan.

Irving used to tell with drar&t!c eff
feet q story about ". G. WINS. the
dra1natist. who, among other services.
wrote for him the play Charles l..
When Wills was a boy ten years old
he was taken to see Edmund Nean
play Macbeth. IN the murder scene
he was so affected by the realistic
power Of the actor that, seized with 4
severe attack Of nausea, ne hurried
from the box. Ten yearS later he was
lunchirg at e chop house In Fleet
street when q man entered. sat down
ut table near him and ordered a
meal. He was q perfect stranger to
Wills. who. after few minutes pro-
pinquity, was again seized with q fit
Of nausea, from which he had not suf-
fered since as q boy he was at the
theater on the occasion mentioned he
was obliged to leave the room. When
some minutes later ne paid his bill the
waiter said to him: Did you see that
gentleman at the table near you:
That's Edmund hean."-H. W. Lucy
in Cornhill Magazine.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
They Meant Business.

a Chicago stage manager was tell
ing of amusing incidents Of blunders
and errors caused by stage fright. In
q romantic play recently revived one
Of the minor characters. I dairyna maid.
comes forward at the end Of the re-
citaI Of a lore romance and comments
as follows:
Hope filed their youth and whetted
their love; they Dlighted their troth!'
But ct one Of the performances the
girl who played the dailylnaid was
absent without notice. At the last mo-
ment the manager gave the lines ito a
shepherdess. who had never had lines
to speak before and who. was excess
lively nervous when her cue came. This
is what the astonished audience heard:
Hope filed their trough and blight
ed their love; they whetted their
TOOTH
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Somewhat PuzzIilrg.

It is not at all surprising that the
American vernacu!ar should some
times prove little too much for the
Englishman. a case in point was that
Of visitor from London who came
to New York last summer and was
taken by his host to see one Of the
league baseball games at the Polo
grounds. The game had progressed as
far as the third inning without any
thing in particular happening. when
suddenly one of Giants pounded
out three bagg ct everybody
bowling with jo.
"That was irG :ulated the
Enclishman's he the excite
mcnt had subsidet
\ moment later foul tip sent the
ball flying back to the grand stand.
and what do you call that" queried
the Englishman.
That's 4 foul" said his host
"Ah," returned the Englishman. "a
fowl, eh? Well. it seems to me that
the language Of baseball is; most ex-
traordinary. a fowl is bird and 4
bird is a fowl, and yet youSlse these
terms to describe two plays taat seem
to me to be diametrically opposed to
each other. Do you call that logical"'
The Englishman is still trying to
think it out-Harper'S Weekly.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Winning e Violin.

The way N. Ysaye, the great violin
ist, became the owner Of Guarnerius
violin dated 1742 was thus quantity
told by himself:
''The Guarnerius was bought in Par
is by q pupil OF mine, q charming
young woman. enyied her the vio-
Lin. and fate gave it to me. teach
this pupil, and by and By meet her
sister, most lovely young woman,
with whom I fall in love straightway
and marry Soon I so to my sister-i1-
law, who was my pupil. and say to
her:
"It is time you stop foolins with
violin. You will never learn how to
play it, I take the liberty of big
brother, but she do not like it for long
time. At last she succumb to my ex-
perience and wisdom, and, she stops
playing. Then say grandiloquently:
"'I Will take the Guarnerius. 1872
I take it, and that is how the violin
came into the possession Of Ysaye.'
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Ennland,s GencroI.

There has not been an English gen
eral since Marlborough. Wellington
was born at Dangan castle, Meath, of
an old Irish family called Wesley and
christened in Dublin. Wolfe was born
at FerneauX abbey, Kildare, and chris
tened at Westerham-nearly in the
same case as the Brontes (Bruntyl.
His grandfather defended Limerick
against Williaic III.
Sir John Moore and the NaIiers were
Scotchmen. and so was Abercromblc
egypt; so were Napier Of Magdala.
Crawford and Clyde. Wolseley. Rob
erts and Kitchener are Irish; so WAS
Cough. The generals and statesmen
who saved India to Great Britain were
Neill. Nicholson, the two Lawrenccs
G-ish). Edwards CWelsh) and Rose
;:;cctch).
I know Of Wolfe because my great
grandfather served under him at Que
bee. His Irish birth was corroborat-
ed to me by Captain Dunno, once well
known in literary circles Of 4 Queens
county family. I don't know whether
Scotchmen like to be called English,
but certainly Irishmen do notion
don News.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
THE DOCTORS.
Tribute to the Nobility of the Medical
Profession.

Tribute to the Nobility Of the Medical
Profession.
To enter the medical profession is to
fnd oneself in most noble company.
When Dante was led by Virgil into the
presence Of "the master Of them that
know" he saw Aristotle surrounded by
a group of the sages OF antiquity. Look
at them as they are introduced one by
one, and you viii see that fourth OF
them bear names illustrious in medi-
cine. To take note of but one-Hippoc-
rates IS there. The student will not
turn to his pages now to learn what
has to be taught in modern text books
or class rooms. Yet be will do well to
lay to heart the spirit that guided "the
father of medicine in drawing up the
oath imposed on the students Of the
Hippocratic school. with purity and
with holiness" the candidate was
made to swear, II will pass my life
and practice my art. Into whatever
houses I enter I will go into them for
the benefit Of the sick, will abstain
from every voluntary act of mischief
and corruption
In the long succession Of those who
have enlarged the bounds Of his sci
ence the student will meet with Q
great army of men who have kept the
spirit Of that oath under higher sane
tions than were open to the pioneers
whom the medieval poet consigns tc
a place in his inferno because. though
blameless of sin, they had not beer
baptized.--Sir Alexander Simpson II
London Culver.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
a Queer Battle.

a traveller in South Africa tells Of 4
singular combat that he witnessed. He
was musing one morning with his
eyes on the ground when he noticed
q caterpillar crawling along at rapid
pace, followed by hundreds o. small
ants. Being quicker in their move
ments, the ants would catch up with
the caterpillar, and one would mount
his back and bite him. Pausing, the
caterpillar would turn his head and
bite the ant and kill his tormentor.
After slaughtering a dozen or more Of
his prosecutors the caterpillar showed
signs Of fatigue The ants made q
combined attack. Eetaking himself to
a stalk Of grass, the caterpillar climbed
up tail first, followed by the ants. As
ore approached be seized it in his
jaws and threw it off the stalk. The
ants. seeing the caterpillar had too
strong a position for them to over
come. resorted to strategy. They be-
gan saving through the grass stalk.
In a few moments the stalk fell. and
hundreds Of ants pounced upon the
caterpillar. It was killed at once.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
THE MEASLES CAMNIBAL.
Method Of Vancouver Island Tribe
to Drive Away Disease.

to Drive Away Disease
a few years ago an epidemic OF
measles broke out among the Indian
tribes living on Vancouver island. in
British Columbia. not far from Fort
Rupert. and the shamans or medicine
men came to the conclusion that Il can
ntbal sorcerer, whom they termed the
"hamatsu" (measlas cannibaD. was
Staying their children to eat them and
that be would continue to do so until
he was killed.
AS they could not slay ghost in his
own person they arranged q ceremony
in which one Of their number posed as
the cannibal and was treated as they
would have liked to treat the real foe.
This fact Of substitute was, of
course, not made public, only the med
icine men knowing the truth Of the
matter.
Against a wall Of rock was painted
an imitation opening. in the center Of
which the "cannibal'' was fastened
~ luG plOpCl tlAIC, .iItSl SOAnS
through various incantations. q cover
ing was jerlzed away, exposing the
cannibal apparently snrinsing through
the solid rock lie WIS promptly grasp
ed by two CT tie priests. who dragged
him out ard rushed him through fire
which WAS burning in front Of the
place and which was surrounded by
all the members of the tribe beating
drums and singing 1T the top Of their
voices BY some jusclerE the canni,
bal was got rid of, and the people were
told that he had flown away through
the air and would not come back.
After this ceremony had been re-
peated several times to put an end to
other epidemics, which were only toe
prevalent among the Indians, It grew
into a sort Of annual affair, managed
by the members of a secret society
whose members know that the sup
posed "hamatsu" was only a man.
Scientific American.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
An Anticlimax.

81 just dropped in to thank you for
that medicine you sent home by my
wife last night" said the grateful pa
tent, g-asping me doctor warmly by
the hand. "I've been laid up of and
on for years. have tried all the patent
medicines on the market and been
treated by every doctor in the teigh-
bcrhood. but your medicine was the
only thing that ever did me any good"
Its a pleasure to have you come
here to tell me this" replied the doc
tor, highly elated- Most Of my pa
tents are not so thoughtful. But that
prescription is my pet favori5e, and I
never yet knew it to fail to cure
cough if taken in time
'.Coueh?" echoed the patient why,
I didn't take it for my cold. I used it
rs a lioimens for my rheumatism.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Grand People In London In 1906.


"I came to town on Wednesday and
intended to 80 to the Ancient Music;
made q Bungle about my Ticket; it
was too late to get it. The Drawing
Room was Rhe object yesterday. They
made mistake in my Dress. 1t was
not deep enough for my Mourning,
and the glass Of my Sedan Chair was
not mended. Looked at my Lodgings;
found them Abominable. walked all
over the Town till was. Lord. how
tired. Looked in upon the Duchess of
Gordon while she took off her Hoop to
Dine with the Bcdfords.''
This was Jane, duchess of Gordon.
who rode down the High street Of Ed
inburgh on pigs back in the days Of
her wild girlhood and raised recruits
for the new highland regiment when
other means had failed by allowing
each man to take the shilling from be-
tween her lips. Hoops. We're de rigueur
for court dress until the days Of George
". although in private life the ladies'
skirts had been growing more and
more scanty since the days Of the
French revolution.-From John Hook
ham Frere and His Friends" by Ga
brielle Testing.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
4 Thrifty HUNGARIAN.

a certain Hungarian peasant named
Jan Eirsch made a business trip to
Budapest, and while there he had the
idea Of ordering hundred visiting
cards. When he returned home he
found. to his dismay, that the cards
bore he name OF MaTisch instead Of
Eirsc1,- It was only printers error.
but to Jan Hirsch it meant 1 loss Of
shilling and sixpencc unless be could
make use Of the cards. he according
y purchased for the sum, Of . shilling
en Official form Of petition and filed it
with Il request to be allowed to alter
his Ma me to Mavisch. His prayer was
granted. He is now Jan Mavisch.-
London News.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
TaLino The Step

It happened while marriage was
being celebrated. Tie bridegroom did
not have the usual happy. bashful
look. Instead be seemed to be profound
" unhappy and ddgeted about. stand
ing first on one foot and then on the
other.
So patent was his state Of mental un-
quiet that the "best man" deemed it
expedient to elucidate the mystery.
"Hae ye lost the ring" he solicitously
inquired.
"No," answered the unhappy one,
with a woeful look; "the rings safe
enough, but. man, I've lost my en-
thusiasm." ."-London Scrap.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
State Of South Carolina
County Of Clarendon.

By James NJ. Windham, Esq, Probate
Judge.
,AsHEREAS, J. S. Ridgeway made suit
~ to me. to grant him letters of ad-
ministration OF the estate and effects
of T. E. Ridgeway.
These are therefore to cite and ad-
monish all and singular tine kindred
and creditors Of the said J E.
Rideeway. deceased, that they be and
appear before me. in the Court of Pro
bate to be held at Manning on the 9Th
day OF Nav. next after publication
hereof, at II o'clock in the forenoon,
to show cause, if any they have, why
the said administration should not be
granted.
Given under my hand, this 2lst day
of April. A. d. 1909.
[sEAL. JAMES NJ. WINDHAM,
Judge of Probate.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
or Sale.

My farm at Jordan of 60 acres. 50 Of
1t now very fertile iuc'osed unto woven
wire fence. q nice home. will exchange
for property ir Manning. Also an ex-
ira nice pair of mares well bred, not
AFRAID of steam or automobiles. bred by
myself. work single OF. double, with or
without eye winkers, quality such as to
make them valuable. ) and 6 years Ole.
H. L. WILSON. ". D.,
Jordan, $ G..
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Digging For Money.

The honest workman was engageI
in excavating operations e.. he w:s
digging. The stray wayfarer Of the
inQuisitive turn Of mind stopped for 4
moment TO look on.
My man" said the S. ". at length
what are you digging for:''
The II. ". looked up.
Money he replied.
Money!" calculated the amazed
S. W. And when do you expect to
strike it:''
Saturday" replied the &. ". and
resumed operations.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
The KouselaSs.

Instead Of being obsolete and simply
an interesting relic. the hourslass in
various forms is twentieth century
necessity. \ machinist authority
points out that for such purposes as
timing hardening and tempering heats
in twist drill manufacture. where Sec
onds or minutes must be gagged accu-
rately, nothing serves like the hour
glass with the right amount Of sand.
Accuracy to fractions Of second can
be had much more easily than by
watching the hands Of q watch.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
.tI,d Rather Die Nnrtn1

than have my feet cur oil, . said NJ. L.
Bingham, of PrinceyiIle. Ill, but you'll.
die from gangrene (which had eater
away eight toes) if you don't said al
doctors. Inste"d he used Buckler's Ar
MICA Salve till wholly cured. 1t cures
of Eczema, Fever Sores, Boils, Burns
and Piles astouad the world. 25c, at al
druggists.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
~ Office !.

The next examination for teachers
will be held at the court house in Man
uing. Friday, May l4th, beginning
promptly at nine o'clock There will
be no summer school this year except
at WotTord college Due credit will be
given for attendance and work to those
who aJterd it, No teacher whose GER
have expired or are about to,
should overlook this examination. Or
tna summer school, if possible TO attend.
E. J. BROWNE.
County Superintendent Education.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
increased,

s.I appear to have made something
Of an impression on that man over
there" remarked young lady at
wedding party. "Hc has been looking
at me ever since I arrived"
eff you mean that one with the
black mustache, he's the detective en-
gagged to look after the presents said
8 friend.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
People past middle life usually hay

People past middle life usually have
some kidney or bladder disorder thai
saps the vitality. which is naturally
lower in old age. Foley's Kidney Rem
edr corrects urinary troubles. stimulate:
the kidneys. and rest"res strength ant
vigor 1t cures uric acid troubles b!
Strengthening the kidneys so they viii
strain out the uric acid that settles il
the muscles and joints causing rheuma
tism. ". Z. Brown q Co.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
He Walked.

Good afternoon. Miss Brown! Go
ing for walk? May so with you?
asked an elderly but ardent admirer Of
the lady.
Yes; my doctor says that we must
always walk with an object, and sup
pose you'll answer the purpose"'
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA,
COUNTY Of Clarendon,

By James NJ. Windham, ESQ, Judge
of Probate.
YagHEREAS, E B. Brown made
W suit to me, to grant him Letters
of Administrator Of the Estate and
effects of George B. Minis.
These are therefore to cite and adj
monish all and singular the kindred
and creditors Of the said George
B. Minis. deceased, that they be
and appear before me, in the Court
OF Probate. to be held at Manning on
the 9th day of Nav next, after
publication thereof, at II O'Clock in
the forenoon, to show cause, il any
they have, why the said ;tlInimistra-
ton should not be granted.
Given under my hand, this Goth
day Of April, a. D. 1909.
JAMES NJ. WINDHAM.
lSEAB.]
Judge of Probate.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
The Exporter,

"Who IS your Chicago friend:"
"Ee is a prominent exporter
what does he export?''
II didn't say he exported anything.
He used to be porter at the hotel
where l stopped" Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
An IncSssHructinIe Color.

The ipdestructible foral colcr is vel,
low. You cannot, even with sulphur
Gus acid fumes, destroy it. Take i
heartsease and try. You will consume
the purple tint easily enough. but tn:
yellow will remain for all your filthy
fumes.-Fry's Magazine.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Very Little Chance,

"It's three years since was in this
city" said stranger in o restaurant
as he was walking out after finishing
his dinner; "city looks the same"
"I don't find much change respond
ed the waiter as he took up the nickel
that was left on the table.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Up Eefc1e the Bar.

\. II. Brown, an attorney, OF Pitts.
fed. VI. writes: We have used DR.,
Kings New Life Pills ior years and find
them such :, good family medicine we
wnui,in't be without them" For Chills.
Constipation. 3illiousness or Sick Head
ache they work wonders. At all drug.
yiS:s.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
She Admitted K,

What Go you asl; for this plaqueE
inquired an old gentleman Of the pref
t. cir! il charge of 4 church bazaar.
One guinea" she replied.
Aren't you i little Gear:" 9uericd
the old gentleman.
We'll" answered the pretty girl.
blushing. that's what the boys all tel
mo-"
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1909-04-28
Wasted Effort.

Kind Old Lady (talking to tramp
Have you ever made an effort to get
work?
Tramp-yes, ma'am. Last month
got work for two members Of my fac.-
lily, but neither Of them would take it.
London Telegraph.