The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-08-08
BY GEO. FITCH

however, will lay In a supply Of ordinary
clothespins and clasp one firmly on MS
nose before entering the dining saloon
he will have little or no trouble lie
may excite son.o attention, but as this
Is a favOrite dive, ZION on shipboard, IL Is
not an objection.
About Eating.
The amateur mariner will be amazed at
first by the uxuriance OF the bill OF fare
Every conceivable article Of food VIII be
offered to him. And, as a rule, he VIII
eat all of them the hrst day. After that
he will eat nothing and lay IL TO seasick-
ness This Is a wise provision OF tho
steamship company which only needs 10
provide food enough for the first day or
two DO not be led to believe that you
have to eat everything on the bill OF
fare. On the first day eat only little
soup, some steak, a slice Of ham or two,
a few boiled eggs, some fruit and cake,
some salad and pudding or two. BY
beginning lightly you VIII thus be able 10
eat full meals during the last few days
and turn the joke on the steamship com
pany.
Getting Acquainted
Getting acquainted Is the great diver
sion on shipboard. The lid Is of and You
are perfectly free to talk TO any one
who will talk back to you. good trav-
eer should be able 10 get acquainted
with every one on shipboard by the sec
ond day. II you will brlbe the purser
to spread the news that you are west
ern millionaire, going uUIOdu TO DhJ u
second hand castle. you will find the job
much easier and more pleasant.
Amusing Yourself.
The question Of spending a week or
two on the ocean far from baseball
diamond or a moving picture theatre Is
at first appalling, However. It is not
hard to amuse ones self on shipDoard:
The favorlte method is to talk about
yourself The game is to make yourself
out a bigger man than the one with
whom you are cOnyerslng- DO not by
any means admit that IL Is your hrst
voyage. on shipboard. people are divid-
ed into two classes-those who have been
over before and those who haven't Join
the former class at once and talk about
your former trips to those who haven
been over IL is perfectly safe and enor-
mOUsly gratifylng-to you BY making
the number of times you nave crossed
big enough, you can become so big a
parsonage on shipbOard that people VIII
even forget you are millionaire.
Pests.
There are many pests on shipboard.
The greatest Is the person who tries TO
tell how many times he has been over
when you want to tell how many times times
you have been over. The next greatest
Is the energetic young woman VINO gets
up games TO amuse the passengers ana
wants TO make you run three-legged races.
Another great pest is the woman VINO
wants to sit I'm your steamer chair all
the time. There are no cures for these
pests. Bear them meeky, and get even
with them all by getting up n collection
for the benefit of the steerage passen-
gers and making them all contribute.
This naturally brings US to the subject OF
Little Gouges.
steamship company is very large
AFFAIR. but it is guilty of some very small
ideas Perhaps you have had the idea
that when you paid 500, 500 or $125 for
n week on the water. you were paying
all your charges You will quickly be
dsabused Of this. On boarding the
rent a place to sit down for the voyage.