Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

"Oh. but suppose there was a wreck
somewhere and they we're sending out that
X Y z signal, or whatever IL is, how
would you know about it7'
"well. you see, madam, it's this way.
l wouldn't hear him for q minute or two.
But then I listen In every five minutes II
a vessel we're sending out a distress signal
l would have been notified by the shore
station before now. There are three men
on duty In those stations, and one Of 'em
has the phone on his head all the time.
You see, the weather is fine and there is
no chance OF a wreck tonight anyway. OF
course. in case Of stormy weather 1 never
remove the telephones. My meals are sent
here and 1 eat without removing the head
pleca"
And with ~unchanging eountenance the
placid wireless man let's them swallow
that tit bit and digest It.
The sweet young things escort breaks
in here. Ho thinks It, a very faulty system.
What you need" he goes on, with the
air Of one who Is blazing a new trail in
science and invention, us a red electric
bulb fastened in front OF your instruments
which would Light when some one called
you"
This bright idea appeals with great force
to the other onlookers, some OF whom sup
plement the happy suggestion by others,
OF which the following are specimens:
why not have an electric bell ring whom
your call comes in? 1 should think a
large, loud one would be preferable 50
that it would wake you up when asleep"
Why not a buzzer fastened to the head
OF your bunk7'
"Or why not reproduce the sound through
a big horn, like they do with phono-
graphsT'
Why not ave the signals come In in
electric nashea tho way they do on
cablesT"
Tn operator never Loses his sangfrold
under his in%undation Of intellect and
mindful Of his traditions and the som
pany's conciliatory policy toward all in
aulries. pulls his wits together and returns
manfully 70 the issue.
Eyes, sir" he says, addressing the red
light idiot that's a splendid idea. You
happen to have hit upon the very thing
the company is trying to perfect. The
mechanical application Of the idea offers
a few obstacles, but our department of in
vention has a corps of eminent scientists
at present busllY engaged in overcoming
grunt from the perspicuous one, who In
"AS S@Se NHoN NAog hou
hurry up or some outsider will steal the
Idea and patent it.
Not all Of the troubles of the wireless
mar at sea have TO do with mere seekers
after knowledge. Sometimes a retired
banker with garrulous proclivites comes
around. bitches up a camp chair and holds
forth as follows:
"Oh, yes, the wireless. Didn't know these
coastwise boats had it. Csed to sit in the
office OF the operator on the Lusitanla and
see him work. Just got back from a trip
to Palestine with my WIFE" and then
launches into a detailed description of
his travels; tells the operator all about his
horses and automobiles, but how he really
loves the sea better than these things, etc.
He will take a case OF 5O-cent cigars out,
light one put the rest back and 60 on
talking until stopped by the dinner gong.
And the next morning he won't even buy
the ocean newspaper.
Interest in the wireless varies with diff
ferent shiploads of passengers. Occasion
ally there will be no visitors out of the
entire passenger list. This gives the wire
less man a rest and his mental powers a
period of rejuvenation, the necessity for
which is sufficiently apparent.