davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

[From the Chicago News.l
It's a corking good thing to bottle
up your wrath
No, -Alonzo, beads of sweat are not
classed as ornaments.
You couldn't raise the hopes of
some people with derrick
Fear of consequences keeps a lot of
men in the straight and narrow path.
Gossip is due to the fact that the
world contains more takers than
thinkers.
The rainy-day skirt was never in
tended for the tall woman with a
stately stride.
Probably a woman doesn't care to
tell her age because she knows that
nobody will believe her
The sick man who is able to swear
at his doctor isn't likely to give the
undertaken a job right away
Even if q woman does fail to enjoy
an outing she always tries to make
those who remained at home believe
she did.
OF course, you know just what Won
would do in another mans place. but
why don't you do the right thing in
your own placer
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
THE CORPORATION TAX.

AS a raiser Of revenue. of which the
federal government is in dire need,
the tax of per cent on the net in
come of corporations which Mr.. Taft
has proposed as a substitute for a
direct individual income tax until
such time as the constitution can be
amended and a law Of this kind can
be passed which will hold water, is an
excellent measure. But there is one
way of looking at it which does not
place it in an enviable light. Perhaps
this way is entirely wrong but it is
none the less interesting.
The high protective tariff of the
past dozen years has helped no one
to a greater extent than it has the
large manufacturing corporations of
the country, the trusts and the gigan-
tic and exceedingly oppressive monop-
olies which it has fostered and which
have waxed fat for the benefit of their
principal owners beyond all reason
and at the expense OF the rank and
| file of the people of the country.
Present indications are that the ire
vised tariff"-and what a missioner
| that is?-which congress proposes to
enact and force down the throat of
! the president, is going to keep the
schedules on all of the essential arti-
cles and commodities at the outrage
ously high figures at which they have
prevailed for the past few years. and
in many instances they will be higher,
If Mr.. Aldrich and his friends have
| their way,
! This only means one thing. The big
corporations, the trusts and the
monopolies are to be permitted to con-
tinue their ravages on the purses OF
| the people. They are going to be al
! lowed to keep on making the rich
men of the land richer and the poor
| men poorer. But the leaders in con-
] gress see the need of more govern
/ mental revenue to help finance many
| of their pet plans for the develop
ment of the country, and which, while
| necessary in most instances, will make
i fat picking for their friends in the
contracting business in various lines
So they have decided to say to their
greedy corporate friends: Eve are
not going to revise the tariff down
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
GLOBE SIGHTS.

from the Atehison G1obe.1
Most men waste too much time on
schemes that won't work.
When a woman has nothing else to
do, she remembers a lot of sewing she
has long neglected.
brakeman recently, at couldn't keep
cool if I should run naked
If there is anything in the pre-
existence theory, what a lot of rab-
bits there were many years ago!
ASK anyone about sick person,
and they will usually reply: ''She is
a little better, but awful weak"
Perhaps one reason Mother never
looks natural when lying in her coffin
is that it is the first time her family
ever saw her hands folded.
When there is spot on the table
cloth at the guests place, and the
hostess offers no apology with it. it
is time for the guest to take the hint
and go.
The average girl brought up in a
religious family has the same fierce
desire to become a missionary that a
boy has to go out west and fight In
dams.
The real dread of men is not the
devil, but old age. An old gentle
man, who is considerably past 10,
yesterday worked twelve hours in a
managed to earn So cents. He needs
pair of shoes, and is working to
earn them.
ST do not believe in going without
the broadening and educational fea-
lures of travel just because L can't
afford to leave town. said Mrs
Lysander John Appleton. So she got
a fashion book, made herself a new
est style bathing suit. and will wear II
when she gets in the bathtub.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Politeness don't cost much but it's
a mighty good asset for q person to
have.
= =
A runaway horse is bad enough but
1t appears from recent news dis
patches that a runaway auto Is worse.
y
The middle course is probably the
safest one to travel but it is apt to
lead to nowhere in particular.
q -
Women think that they have all the
troubles in the world. They're
wrong, though. They merely have all
that the men don't have.
y
There's all kinds of dissatisfaction
in the world. Among it is the gen.
eral desire of fat persons to be thin,
and vice versa.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR

LFrom the New York Press
A man likes to think he's smart be-
cause the candidate he voted for got
elected.
The reason a stout woman doesn't
expect to keep on getting fatter is she
keeps right on.
A girl is almost as much fiattered
by having a man propose to her as
his sending her a box of flowers.
There's nothing that can influence
man to take present home to his
wife so strongly as guilty con-
science
You can spend an awful lot of
money educating q boy to reason
about one-tenth as well as he could
do before by instinct.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE away.

Subscribers of the State journal
away during the simmer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
10 any address at the rate of ten
cents a week or thirty cents a month
(by mail onIy.) Address changed as
often as desired. While out of town
the state Journal viii be to yon like
a daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions. to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Governo~ Hadley. of Missouri, told a
Topeka Chautauqua audience that the
present methods for correcting monopo-
les are inadequate. One good way to
bring these gourmands to time would
be to greatly reduce the tariff schedules
on the articles and commodities they
manufacture and handle. They have
become mad with the riches that a high
ly protective tariff has permitted them
to eobble up.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Poor Mrs. Katherine Clemmons Gould!
What a distressing predicament is now
confronting the unfortunate woman!
She took her oath IN court that it costs
her $4,000 year merely to dress pro-
perly Something of a Daniel of a
Judge decided that her husband would
only have to pay her the mere sum OF
$4,000 a year for all of her purposes
Ergo. shell surely have to go naked
q part of each year.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

According to John Norris, represent
ing the newspaper publishers in their
efforts TO secure lower duties on wood
Pulp aad aper. Mr.. Aldrich made no
less than 10 statements which were
grave errors of facts in his discussion
in the senate of the wood-pulp and pa
FER business. That, apparently, is the
Aldrieh way of doing business. And ne
meets al such accusations as these
v eth serene smiles. Why not? He has
the votes
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

was fixed in the Payne bill. Mr.. Aldrich
must be intoxicated with his power. He
is probably answering the criticisms of
the whole people OF the country by
showing them that he can go as far
as he likes in revising the tariff
schedules by raising them. He'll make
them pay we'll for their ternerity to
question his acts and motives
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

William T. Stead, the famous Eng
fish publicist, announces that he is now
III a position to open up a bureau for
the purpose of communicating with the
spirits IN the other world. Here's wish
ing him success in his new field of en-
deavor. Most folks would like to know
just how things are going in the land
where spirits roam
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

That the moon was 4 planet captured
by the earth from space aid not de-
tached portion of this globe is the ar
nouncement of Profess or T. j. j. See,
a famous American astronomer. Maybe
this is true. But for captive, the moon
las a whole lot of liberty.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Commercial and financial reviews on
the business conditions in the country
during the past week are unanimous in
stating that an improvement in all lines
of trade is being made. The indications
are that this will not only continue but
will grow greater with each succeed
ing week. Prosperity Is certainly on the
homeward march again.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
HUMOR OF THE Day

Details wanted.-"That fellow worksw.
eh?' Il don't know answered the we
citizen. Does he toll nights because Ms
days discussing batting averages and pen
nant prospects ?'-Louisville Courier-Jour-
nal.
1t is not the worst liar who makes hit.
but the best.-I.ife.
The Death OF Gaming-"AIl gambling
must be stopped within the jurisdiction of
this Court" Numbered the Judge. Bet
ssid the 5adae. reaching for sP lis To"Fhi-
What makes that fellow so popularT'
stIn listen 1., tG funny story Without in
Journal.
Knicker-Laugh and the world laughs
game.-Columbia Jester.
wei, Johnny having any luck? what
do you fish with, worms flies?'
Worms. ocourse. 1t amt warm enough
Record-Herald.
eecsions Sssw T nmT IKE b sss6
with the strongest pull Wisconsin
Sphinx.
81 wonder if he ever thinks of his d.
yorced wife?,, IT'S not likely, You see he
has SO much trouble with his present wife
that he has no time to remember former
woes. brooklyn Life
The Boss-rd like to give you employ
do. Applicant-That just the sort OF
job I'd like. sir, if the salary were salts
factory.-Cleveland Leader.
What makes you so sure you know ex-
pery hUM much got nnf to exprss
honest opinion as to the figure at which
| tax. w ashington Star.
Yes, :. admitted the fair divorce. T
| the spinster. you are repenting at leisure.
ehg'' Mot SO you can notice it, answer
mon NY: y."-chicago NEVIS News cow q ''i''i'' an
isn't Papa is ae pretty it EGGa pShsT pays5
gether.'' "of course. he does. but wait
Post.
Oh, stay a little longer, .simpossibIe. my
dear fellow, But will leave my coat and
send me back to fetch them. -Meggendor-
/ fer Blaetter.
ano? Beila~No. she Just sits in the a r,i
| dience and hums.-Puck.
Professor of Socioogy-If this alarming
| increase in the divorce rate continues.
the home VIII no longer exist in America.
Practical Student-Ifow is that. Professor?
| They all marry again, don't they?-Puck.
| Mr.. Newed-Well. dearest. you can't say
| I ever contracted bad habits. Mrs Viewed
1 mo. George, you generally expand them.
Judge.
i Investing His Profits-s@what are you
going to do with the money you get for
your crops this year?" q guess I'll git
one O. these here centaurs I read about in
a book to run the new carriage 1 bought
mary mar creature. wei. this is am am mag mag
mary carriage. "-Washfngton Star.
Colleetor--You promise to pay this bill
every time I call. When are you going to
do SO? I'm getting tired of coming up
| here week after week. Please remember
| that time is money. Owitt-I know IL, and
I intend paying youth time.-Chicago
| News.
| A Gilded Youth believe I'll go in
| for ballooning a bit. 1t seems to be the
| thing. What kind of a balloon shall you
| buy?' '-Oh, I'll have touring affair."
| cloud-clfmber, a ba1loonette and light
| fIyabout for town use."-Kansas City Star
Some men are so optimistic that they
| think nobody knows it's their last years
straw hat.-Ohio State Journal.
| No Hope.-The Proud Mother-This boy
4 do grow more like lis father every day.
you tried everything 2-The Sketch.
| ------ ~-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

1t cost Oklahoma $1,000 to try and
v ipe Crazy Snake off the map. A long
suffering public that enjoys little the
strical entertainment once in a while,
Is distressed to think that the move
4nent was not successful. 1t is report
ed that his eminence, this same elusive
Crazy Snake, is going on the vaudeville
IL
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

This IS interesting. DR.. BASTARD, the
new paEtor of the Euclid Avenue Bap-
tist church, OF Cleveland. OF which John
d. Rockefeller is a member, has pro-
1,ounced a denunciation of DR.. Aked,
t,xstor of The Fifth Avenue Baptist
church of New York. Of which Mr..
Rockefeller is also an attendant. DIR.
Bustard says DIR. Aked is a heterodox
Baptist minister. DR.. BASTARD insists
that he himself is q purely orthodox
Baptist minister. But there is no tell
irg just now what DR.. Aked thinks he
dc
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Beatrice Maria Teresa Blenvenide is
+he name that has been thrust upon
the new princess of Spain. That ought
to be sufficient for all purposes but it
isn't marker to the one that the little
heir to Hollands throne has to carry
around on her tiny shoulders.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

titude he would wish her to take to
the rest of the masculine world. He
had got that far in three days And
six weeks later he and the girl wers
travelling over the same route again
on their honeymoon.-(Copy
1903, by Associated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Deposits in the national banks of
Chicago are now greater than they ever
have been before. This money will come
in handy to help move the wheat and
other crops.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
FRON OTHER PENS
MUcH-REJECTED MR.. BRYAN.


Democratic senators have served for
NAL notice on Mr.. Bryan that he is
not the sole proprietor of the Demo-
cratic lawn; in fact an intimation is
given that he would do better to keep
off the grass Mr.. Bryan's criticism
of the Democratic senators have been
numerous ever since debate commence
ed ON the tariff bill. and the senators
have finally injected some views of
their own into the Congressional Rec
ord. Mr.. Tillman inquiries, Who gave
Bryan the right to say who is a Demo-
crat?" Senator Simmons, of North
Carolina, ;tdminis tiers the most unkind-
est cut of all when he says: AFTER fol-
lowing Bryan II years to defeat and
disaster, I don't see what right he has
to dictate to Democratic senator's and
Senators Bailey Smith and others with
Democratic credentials follow in the
same strain.
Mr.. Bryan is evidently going on the
theory IL he has to suffer defeat every
four years he should at least have the
onsolatior of laying out the race track.
He knows every signboard and cross
street and there is no probability of
getting onto the wrong highway when
he is oiloting the party automobile.
Mr.. Bryan Las overlooked one import
ent fact, however. and that is that
while southern Democrats have saved
their political fortunes in TIE past the
pcrtents are numerous that southern
voters are breaking away from tradi-
ton and may some day refuse to be
herded into any corral bearing the
word Democrat over the gate. Not
eniy have the southern Democrats re-
jected Mr.. Bryan's advice in voting
| ON the tariff bill in both house and
senate, but now they tell him plainly
| they propose to do it again If they
feel like it.-Omaha Zee.
FOREST FIRES.
-,
Maine and New Hampshire. Two small
lbackwoods settlements have been
swept away, their inhabitants barely
escaping with their lives. Other vii
lagos are threatened by the advancing
| fires. It has not rained so heavily
down east this spring it has in the
west. The western forests are pretty
| well soaked or the first fires of the
season might have been among them.
| 1t will be known later in the year
4 Wisconsin have remembered the fiery
| lessons of 1908 The long continued
droughts of the summer and early fall
of last year were followed by fires
| which were extremely destructive to
| life and property. The property loss in
| Michigan alone was about $40, 600, 600
The woodland tracts which are looked
after by the national government are
| the only ones which are reasonably
free from CONGREGATIONS. The forestry
| bureau has showed the states what
they should do, but they are slow to
profit by its teachings. Forest protec-
ton would mean spending few thou
/ sands of dollars to save millions. but
state legislatures usually are too short
sighted to vote the ti1ousands.-Chicago
| Tribune
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

IF it isn't one thing it's another"
is pertinent wall from the Boston Her
aid. Just as we begin to feel easy
about the coal bin. along comes the an
neal scare about the ice chest"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

This is almost too much. In addition.
tc taking hides off the free list and
lacking a duty of 10 per cent on them,
the senate has now increased the du-
Ties on shoes and sole leather as It
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Sir Paolo Tosti. the popular song
composer, has a fad for upholstering-
and it is claimed for him that all of
the upholstering of Lady Tosti's draw
ing room furniture has been done by
her celebrated husband.-The Circle.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
The Scotch ALRIGHT.

; A Scottish laird overheard some
lowlard cattle dealers discussing the
use of England instead of "Britain"
expects that every man will do his
duty According to one patriotic
Sect. there was no question of the
admfraPs forgetfulness. and when a
companion expressed surprise at the
tsinjustice" the patriot treasured him.
NELSON" he explained, ''only expects
of the English; he said naething of
Scotland. for he kent the Scotch would
do tI16irf"-London Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28
What Is o. Havana Cigar?

What is a Havana cigar? The Lon
don sessions jury on Wednesday appear
to have been of opinion that cigar
made in England of Havana tobacco
cannot rightly so be called. And George
Augustus Sala. who knew as much
about smoking as most people, and
had studied Cuban eigarmaking on the
spot. once set forth that three kinds
of cigars came from Havana itself.
First genuine Havana, made of tobac-
CO grown, cured, and rolled in the Is
land of Cuba; second, cigars composed
inside of United States or European
tobacco imported into Cuba, with an
outside wrapper of Havana leaf; third.
cigars brought ready made from Eu-
rope, mostly from Bremen and Switz-
erland. and re-exported from Havana
to Europe, where they pay duty and
are sold to the unwary as "Havanas.''
London Chronicle
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

The Boss-Fd like TO give you employ
ment, young man, but there is no work to
do. Applicant-Thats just the sort OF
job I'd like. sir, if the salary were salts
factory.-Cleveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

what makes you so sure you know ex-
actly how much money that man makes
per annum?'' Il got him to express HI
honest opinion as to the figure at which
there should be exemption from an income
tax Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Yes admitted the fair DIVORCE. IT
married in haste" And now" remarked
the spinster, you are repenting at leisure.
ehg'' mot so you can notice it," answer
ed the (. d: I'm drawing $500 a month ali
ony."-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Stella-Does she accompany on the pi-
ano2 Bella-No. she just sits in the au-
dience and hums.-Puck.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

At the Club-"What. Going. Braun.
Oh, stay a little longer" Impossible, my
dear fellow. But will leave my coat and
umbrella here, and perhaps my wife will
send me back to fetch them. "-Meggendor-
fer Blaetter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Professor of Sociology-If this alarming
increase in the divorce rate continues,
twenty years from now the institution of
the home will no longer exist in America.
Practical Student-How is that, Professor?
They all marry again. don't they?-Puck.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

isn't hep Eyes, he Isn't 'Why he says
he wins from you every time you play to-
gether." '.Of course, he does. but wait
until you see what do to papa when you
and me are safely married. Houston
Post
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Mr.. Newed-Well. dearest, you can't say
I ever contracted bad habits. Mrs. Viewed
No. George, you generally expand them.
Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

"I wonder if he ever thinks of his di-
yorced wife?'' ITS not likely. You see he
has SO much trouble with his present wife
that he has no time to remember former
woes. Brooklyn Life.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Investing His Profits.-twhat are you
going to do with the money you get for
your crops this year?" ST guess I'll git
one O. these here centaurs I read about in
book to run the new carriage 1 bought
last year" why, a centaur is an imag-
mary creature ''Well, this is an mag
mary carriage. "-Washfngton Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-28

Collector-You promise to pay this bill
every time call. When are you going tC
do SO? I'm getting tired of coming vi
here week after week Please remember
I intend paying youth time.-Chicagc
News.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1909-01-13

!.
w. III. and L. E. Veritz of Munich
N. D., were among the out-of-town
visitors who spent last night in Be.
midi and were guests at the Hotel
Markham.
]. E. Lundrigan, a Cass Lake
attorney, came over from the Lake.
yesterday afternoon and spent today
looking after some clients legal
interests in this city.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ted Getchell and
the formers mother, Mrs. Bert
Getchell, Of this city departed on
this mornings uth-bound passenger
train for Murphy, North Carolina,
where they will spend the remainder
of the winter. They were accom-
panied by Gladys, the little daugh-
ter of Mrs. Bert Getchell.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1909-01-13
He Told the L.awver.

Lawyer S. is well known for his un-
comely habits. He cuts his hair about
four times a year and the rest Of the
time looks decidedly ragged about the
ears. He was making a witness de-
scribe barn which figured in his last
case.
"How long had the barn been
built?''
"Oh, don't knoW-about a year
mebby, about nine months p'r'aps.'
"But just how long? Tell the jury
how long itshad been built
"Well, don't know exactly-quite
awhile
''Now, Mr.. B., you pass for an intel
ligent farmer, and yet you can't tell
me how old this barn Is, and you
have lived on the next farm for ten
years. Can you tell me how old your
own barn is? Come, now, tell us how
old your own house is, if you think
you know"
Quick as lightning the old farmer
replied:
"You want to know how old my
house is, do We? Well, it's just about
as old as you be, and the roof needs
seeing to about as bad" =.
In the roar that followed the witness
stepped down, and Lawyer S. didn't
call him back.-London Globe.