Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-06-24
Pointed Paragraphs.

constantly removed to allow the new
skin beneath to form fresh, white and
beautiful.
The man who tells you all he knows
isn't half so bad as the man who tries
to tell you all he thinks he knows
Somerville Journal.
Pat (to English traveler)-And have
you heard the latest?
E. T--No. What is it?
Pat-Shure, In Ireland they can't
hang a man with a wooden leg.
e. T.-What do they do then?
Pat--Ach, shure. they just hang him
with a rope.-Current Literature.
OF land animals the rabbit holds the
palm for rapid increase. A rabbit
breeds seven times year, producing
about eight young at time.
The ultima Thule" Of the ancients
was declared by Pliny and other an
cient writer's to be Iceland. Says PHI
ny, 1T is an island in the Northern
ocean discovered by Pytheas after sail
ing six days from Orcades." Others
considered the most distant northern
land" to be Shetland.
Mother-My child, you shouldn't be-
lieve more than half you hear. Daugh-
teri know that, mamma, but how
can tell which Exchange.
"Have you tank in the building?"
inquired the inspector from the insur-
ance Office.
I'VE how" admitted the janitor.
whats the capacity"
Faith, an OF niver hod money
enough to fond out" Bohemian Mag
azine
Emery wheels are made by pulveriz
ing pieces of emery and then mixing
dust with clay into suitable molds and
firing like earthenware.
II suppose you carry a memento Of
some sort in that handsome locket Of
yours?"
YES; it is a lock of my husbands
hair"
But your husband is alive"
yes, but his hair is all gone. Pick
Me-Up.
Blobbs-A girl seldom hits anything
she aims at Slobbs-Yes, especially
If she throws herself at young man
Philadelphia Record
Some one asked Archbishop Whately
if he believed personally in early ris-
ing. That witty divine replied that he
had on one occasion risen early. but
that he felt so proud all the morning
and so sleepy all the afternoon that he
had resolved in the evening never to
do it again
1t is often cheaper to be imposed
upon than it is to fight. This fact re-
suits in many unfair men.-Atchison
Globe.
The Teacher Of Elocution-Do you
mean to say that Won said mo" to Mr..
Etuper tWicef The Grammar Teacher
YES; and then lie went away and said
he would never come back any more
GnG was 50 sure he would know what
meant by a double negative.-Bohe-
miGD Magazine.
which 90 you consider best, a long
or short engagement"
rs your friend a tightwad or a |
ready spenderf' Houston Post.
He-Half past II! Isn't that clock
fast:
She think not
He-Wen I guess my watch is like
myself. II is slow.
She-But it is not exactly like you.
He-Indeedt
She-No 1t goes.-Harlem Life.
He-Won't you miss me when I'm
far away?
She-No; III always think of you as
very close.-COrnell Widow.
John Smith fell down the cellar
stairs the other day and broke his left I
leg, his right arm two ribs, his nose, |
one finger and cut his scalp, sprained
his ankle and put his shoulder out of
Joint. But he didn't really begin to
feel bad about it till his wife asked
him if be was hurt.
Mrs. Benham-How much did you
pay the minister when we were mar
RED? Benham-He fined me Solar
per's Weekly.
Bridget" said Mrs Hiram Oner
sternly, ION my way home just now /
saw the policeman who was in the
kitchen with you so long last evening,
and took occasion to speak to HIM
"Oh, shure, that's all roight, ma'am.
Orm not the least bit jealous. Phil
adelphia Inquirer.
Mother Willie, are you sure YOU
have washed your hands? Willie-Oh,
yes, mamma. If you don't believe me.
look at the towel
WAS the wedding a success ~
81 guess so. The brides mother was
In tears, the groom's mother went her
one better and had Mysteries, you
couldn't hear a word of the ceremony,
and the church was so crowded that
three women tainted. Yes, 1t was a
success all rlght,"-Life
"Well, Reuben. what did your big
pig fetchY
mot near so much as l expected,
And ] never thought it would"