The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, 1909-05-28


gulshcd citizen WHonl you all expect
10 vote for. Like Kelley.
Like Kelley Nj. chairman and fel.
low-GotcIsi 1 am with you neart and
soul IN the purposes OF this meeting
whatever they may be. would like TO
take this opportunity OF commenting
primary reform. | believe In direct
nominations. would rather have the
nomination come direct than TO have
II denectsd NJ S6ult Salnte Marie!
While YOU are getting pub,ic owner
ship. fellow help one OF your
number TO cinch our national owner
rule everywhere but In China, Ire
land and Lansing. What say you?
Has not the time arrived for striking
out that ancient Lhune. Michigan, My
Michigan" and substituting therefor,
'"fhe Wearing % the Green
Chairman Oneof Myown-We Will
now listen 10 comrade + + migrate.
To submit "a list OF the men who act as
my conpaign committee every two
years. feel that should give these
devoted followers something more than
three cheers. | recommend them for
positions as motormen and conductors
with full pay for half service just as
soon as the people come into the pos
session OF these priceless privileges
they have given 10 greedy private cor
porations for countless years. | recon-
mend, also. that all employees OF the
street railway be required TO keep on
hand supply OF Ingrates tooth paste.
soap and p, rfume. TO the end that pub
lie ownership Will smell sweet TO those
members OF the dainty Committee OF so
who now declare II smells 10 heaven.
That Is all. Mr.. Chairman
Chairman Oneof Myown-Report and
recommendations accepted | am In
formed that Jersey Hunchon. franchise
seeker eternally. Is DESTROYS OF COM
municating with this committee In the
expressive but inaudible floral Ian
guage, which he Hon. Like Kelley has
done so much to make popular Shall
aesthctically?
(Mlngled cries OF Down with him.
Put him outr and Let him in")
Chairman Oneof Myown-l Will as
sumo the responsibility OF admitting
him Mr.. migrate. you may escort the
enter Jersey Hunchon meekly,
noiselessly. deliberately, putting, long
produces bunch of Stephanotis)
Chairman Oneof Myown-He pre-
sents the Stephanotis. meaning viii
you accompany me to the east?" What
to Montreal?
chairman oneof Myown hands Jer-
sey Hunchon bunch OF wild tansy,
and he departs dejectedlyD
Chairman Oneof Myown--I guess
that wild tansy will hold him for
while You know It's the lemon
To work. our public ownership meas
ure must 20 to the people. Ii should
have been Floral pills business TO
have prepared this. but he is evidently
absorbed in other great problems.
CAS- they get busy the voices OF
Floral Phil and Prof. slickery are
hoard at tIs.-rsaF-rshe -ths-same
speech.)
Prof sIickery-Your gestures will
have to be toned down. They look as
II you were going to throw something
but drop that windmill movement
one circle is enough TO carve out OF the
unofrending air. Now, say while you
did not expect to be called upon. and
consequently are unprepared. you are
none the less honored In standing be-
fore such patriotic host
Floral Phil-My friends and l might
say gentlemen. while I did not expect
to be called upon and consequently am
good deal in the air. you are never
theless standing before an idiotic goat!
Prof. SIickery-Angels and ministers
OF grace defend US. but you are rotten!
Floral Phii-Gee. but you're rotten!
Gentlemen, l thank you.
(Curtain.)
ACT ~.
River Fete Night. At the invitation
OF Mayor Floral Phil. both Committees
OF so have gathered to witness Allie
gorical Portrayals OF Incidents in Mod
ern Detroit. THESE comprise % River
Fete. CD Canadian Reciprocity. CD
League-before and after, Tableaux
received with great enthusiasm! Close
OF exhibition marred by alteration be-
tween leaders OF two committees
Oneof Myown-'Twill be happy day
when we can have a tableau picturing
the dawn OF public ownership.
+: Whiriing Eddy-Aw. forget It, my
deah boy.
F.F. IBgrate-See what Glasgow has
done
DIR. Carextensions-Look at der
electromagnetic city OF Cleveland. vich
Tom Johnson has done.
Oneof Myown-Your a Dutch Ana
Mas.
F. whirIing Eddy-Mollycoddle. MIN
compoopi
-lGeneral melee ensues between rival
commissioner Terrible uP R,or, Bis Dis
attended by Prof SlickeryJ
Prof slickery-Cease, brawlers, cease!
Look, who is here! What shocking
mayor. that embodiment OF culture and
poise, Floral Phil. who will now ad-
dress you.
Prof sIicisery Gin stage whisper)-
Louder.
FLORAL Phil-Fellow- citizens. friends.
gentlemen. and those louder members.
the band. l am glad to look upon such
n representative and reputable rally OF
freemen. While l was not expected to
be called upon awkward gesture,
prompted by Prof Slickery) and there
fore am totally unprepared. / am none
the less honored by being permitted to
sum n anu pdlTlOllt
host. You have-er, you have (chews
Violently
Prof Slickery Gin suppressed tones)
Gum In your mouth
Floral Phil-You have gum in your
mouth! But the great question Is, what
have you in your mind? That Is. what
have you in your mind on this moving
subject OF street railways? I must say
II is a very interesting matter--a very
interesting matter--and your presence
here tonight In such large numbers
4rr-r 4rvTr ~
heart and soul in the assertion=-which-
repeat nqualihedly-that this Is a
very interesting question. Personally /
am sorry that other engagements have
made II impossible for me to take up
this question some evening after din
ner-between dinner and the theater-
Children CHN