The Cairo bulletin., 1909-08-23
Rivals for the
.CannibalQ ueen

Mr. Kicker turned to the company
and said: Gentlemen. shall | intrude
upon your time if | relate just one OF
my adventures
"Oh, go ahead" said Strout ITS
our rule to let a man talk until We get
enough, and then-'
He raised his right foot suddenly.
Il understand" said Mr. Kicker.
"When | was about % years old our
vessel was wrecked and |, the only
one saved, was cast ashore on can
nibal island-or, to be more correct
ethnologically, an island inhabited by
cannibals. | was handsome young
fellow, and ii is not at all surprising
that the queen, who was young, I'M
married and. fortunately. pretty, fell
IN love with me and wished to become
my wife.
But the prime minister, or great
paniandrum, as he was called, wished
his son to marry the queen and be-
come king. so he and his minions
planned to get rid OF me.
"Lola-Akwa, that was the queens
name. discovered the plot, and re-
solved to save me.
You all read your Bibles. and you
will remember that in the olden days
there were places that We're called
Cities of Refuge On that island
there was a tree of refuge. II was at
least 100 feet high and for 200 f9et
from it, in every direction, not tree
or shrub could be found. This open
space gave the pursuers a fine chance
for an arrow shot before the refugee
reached the tree
"Lola-Akwa told me to climb to the
top of that tree and stay there until
she sent word for me to come down.
But the panjandrum discovered my
hiding place. The queen declared that
! was protected by all that was sacred
in their religion. but the great pan
iandrum proved by the cannibal Bible
that only cannibals were entitled to
its protection He said they would
roast a man, and ii | would eat him
and pick his bones | might so free. |
declined, for am particular about my
diet.
Then the great panjandrum seized
an AK and struck at the foot OF the
tree. Others followed his wicked ex.
ample and 1t soon began TO totter,
They next tied rope about the trunk
of the tree. The plotters were 16 in
number counted them. They stood
in line, Juggling at the rope.
"Lola-Akwa stood far back awaiting
the terrible. moment of my death
could see that her eyes were filled
with tears. The tree fell. and ] went
flying through the air--to certain
death.
when | came to. | found myself
clasped in Lola-Akwa's arms Where
am II ! asked. Look she said.
did, and learned the wonderful truth,
The great tree had fallen upon the
| great pan1andrum and his Is conspir-
| ators and killed them ALL"
For moment there was silence,
then chorus of voices exclaimed:
Did you marry the queen"
The stranger pressed his hand upon
| his forehead.
NO If remember correctly, some
one held an ace and took my queen"
He arose from the nail keg.
I'm hungry. | would like some sup
per and bed for the night To-mor.
row | will embrace my only living
relative. Is there a boarding house in
town."
"Somethin' better'n that" said Abb
ner. We've got a hotel--the Hawkins
house. Mis- Hawkins keeps H. I'm
going along that way and I'll interduce
you. She's a pretty good talker her
self" and Abner winked with both
eyes as they went out.
Well said Benoni, as the door
closed after them. the Bible says An