davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
and Glamour
Lifted from Tiburon

them that there was nothing OF value on
the Island. However, they crossed to the
Island established permanent camp and
for five weeks prosecuted their explora-
uons' finding no indication OF any thing OF
value or OF great interest
The island is twenty miles wide and
thirty-five miles long and is Of volcanic
origin. Good grass abounds and there Is
some running water. It contains no human
beings. but hundreds OF deer and myriads
OF wild pigeons. Inscriptions were found
proving the visit there in 1905 OF rescue
party In search OF traces OF the Grindell
exploring expedition. lost the year before
During the party's stay the island was
visited by former Congressman Conn OF
Indiana, who is making pleasure cruise
In his private yacht Comfort.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24

NoGALEs. Ariz., Dec. 2s.-The mystery
and glamor surrounding Tiburon island,
Gulf Of California, has been dissipated ef-
fectually through the return yesterday of
seven American explorers, who had passed
through Nogales on October 10 on their
way to explore the island, which they sup
posed TO be Inhabited by man-eating seri
Indians and TO contain hidden treasures
and rich mineral deposits. The party was
under the leadership Of Prof Fayette A.
Jones
provisloned IL for a three months stay.
and proceeded up the gulf. landing at Keno
bay on the mainland Here they were
visited by twenty Seris. men and women.
who proved friendly ana who Informed
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Mark Twain Says y y
He's Not Dying
Charge is Not True; I'm Behaving
as Good as I Can," He
Asserts.

RBDDING, Conn, Dec. 2S-Mark Twain
today gave out thu following statemen;
as result of various reports CONCERNING
his condition of health following his recent
return from Bermuda
Il hear the newspapers say / am dying.
The charge is not true. I would not do
such thing at my time of life. i am
behaving as good as can. Merry Christ
mas to everybody"
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Half Million for
Indianapolis Parks
Codicil to Rhodius Will Cuts Off
Dare Woman and Provides
for Family.

INDIANAPOLIS, Dec. pa codicn to
the will Of George Rhodius, filed for pro
bate today, leaves the residue of his es-
tate, or about $4,000 to be applied to i'm
provement Of the parks In indianapolis.
The original will gives only $4,000 to the
woman known as Elma Dare, who has
appealed to the Indiana supreme court the
annulment of her marriage to him.
The codicil to the will cuts Elma Dare
off without any share Of the estate. Num-
erous relatives and friends are provided
for and the rest Of the fortune is to go to
certain charities and to the park system.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Big Fight for
McLaurin's Scat
Half a Dozen Aspirants Appear for
Mississippi Senatorship-No
State Funeral.

JACKSON, Miss. Dec 2S.-The death of
United States Senator McLaurln occurring
within ten days of the biennial legislative
session gives promise of the most spirited
political struggle in the history of the
commonwealth.
The legislature must elect an incumbent
for the unexpired term OF three years and
three months.
Indications are that the names Of a half
dozen aspirants will be presented including
Ex-Governor j. k Vardaman, and Chief
Justice A. H. Whitfield of the supreme
court.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
WU ASKS MANY QUESTIONS
ABOUT NEW TRAIN TUNNELS
Retiring Chinese Minister Visits
Latest Engineering Feat in
New York.

NEW YORK. Dec. 2a-wu Ting-fang,
the retiring Chinese minister to the United
States, came 10 New York today expressly
to inspect the passenger train tunnels unde
the Hudson river which connect Manhat-
tan with the various railroad terminals on
the Jersey side.
DIR. Wu displayed his well known pro-
pensity for asking questions and when the
tour was finished a member of the party
said:
"Dr Wu has the man from Missouri
looking life deaf and dumb man when II
comes to a matter of show me-"
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
NEW ORLEANS TO HAVE SHOW
VIII Celebrate Opening of Canal and
Ann-VcrsRry of Clty'a
Founding.

NEW ORLEANS. Dec. 2S.-An exposition
will be held in New Orleans to celebrate
the opening Of the Panama canal and in
oldentally the two hundredth anniversary
OF the founding Of the city. Today plans
were announced for a meeting of all the
commercial bodies Of the city In the near
future TO work out details
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Today is the last
cha nee to buy
Xmas presents.

Under the head of "Christ-
mas Hints" on the first want
ad page, are a lot of sugges-
tons that will help the late
shopper. Some of the things
are quite out of the ordinary.
Have you read the want ads yet
today?
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
EVIDENCE STOLEN FROM JAIL
Wagon Load of Liquor Seized In
Raid ON Social Club Dls-
Nf appears.

GALEHA, Kan, Dec, 2S.-A wagon load
Of beer. whisky and other liquors which
was seized in raid on social club here
yesterday afternoon was stolen from the
city jail last night The liquor had been
locked up and was to have been used ~
evidence.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
ROBBERS BLOW KANSAS BANK
Secure Fifteen Hundred Dollars from
Safe and Battle with Presi-
dent Follows.

MOUND CITY, Kan, Dec. 23.-Robbers
early today blew open the safe OF the
State Bank Of Centerville, near here, and
escaped with $500. One of the robbers
the last to leave the building, was fired
upon by c. II. Brown president OF the
bank. The robber returned the fire and
after a lively fusillade OF shots drove
Brown to cover and escaped. Neither was
wounded.
The interior of the bank was wrecked.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Foarteen Men Missing.

SEATTLE, Dec. 2.-Mystery wells the
fg.lc OF the fourteen men composing the
crew OF the four-masted schooner Susie M.
Plummer which is drifting abandoned IA
tho ocean south OF Cape Flattery a.
menace 20 navigation II Is supposed the
crew was taken off by a passing vessel.
The Plummer was carrying lumber from
Everett 10 California
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
Dawson to Take
Leading Place
in w ashington
Council Bluffs Man, Specialist in Cen
trail American Affairs, Arrives
at the Capital.

- AAa
wAsHING1
gram.)-Thom,
Bluffs, retiring
been designate
Latin-American
partment, arriv
from South Anne
There is strong
circles that Mr..
followed by an {
more definite 20
towarz the situat
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24

CONTINUED on Second Page.)
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
WEATHER FORECAST.

For Nebraska-Rain or snow.
For Iowa-Rain or snow.
For weather report see page 2.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-12-24
THE OMAHA BEE

a clean. reliable newspaper that is
admitted to each and every hcme.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
GOVERNMENT REGULATION

Henry Clews, the prominent Nau.
York banker, cannot be held in ax-
ceeding high regard by certain of the
interests" in Wall street where he is
such a prominent figure. He is al
ways delivering himself of opinions
which must go decidedly against the
grain with them. These opinions of
his, though, on the big affairs in the
financial and business world. are gem
orally we'll founded and therefore thew
are given due weight and considera-
ton all over the country.
Nothing that he has had to saw of
late is more to the point than some
statements he made at a recent ban
quet in New York city of the Ameri-
can Civic Alliance. His subject was
Democracy and Evolution" and he
concluded that in the further evoIu-
ton OF our democracy a question of
chief importance is the matter of gov
ernmental regulation. "Repugnant as
the doctrine of socialism may seem
to many" he said, land so utterly
foreign to the very spirit of our con-
stitution, 1 believe that the machin-
stricting growth-should be so adjust
erful establishments of the country
agricultural, railroad and Industrial
and to punish and prevent all corpor-
ate abuses. In my opinion these
abuses can be prevented, and their
existence or persistence is the fault
alone of the government in not sup
pressing them in the incipient stage"
This is one of the big tasks con-
fronting the Taft administration. That
an earnest effort will be made to bring
about its accomplishment there can
i be no doubt. President Taft is pledg-
ed to it. 1t is a mammoth subject to
handle properly but the man now in
the presidential chair of the United
States is of large caliber. He is
peculiarly fitted to do this work and
he has surrounded himself with q
cabinet of brilliant lawyers who will
undoubtedly lend him much help in
/ this particular. All of which should
be particularly satisfying to the PEG.
| nile of the land.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
Wanted to Wager His wife.

Henry Becker often expressed cha
grin because he could not wager his
beautiful wife on the races, according
to Mrs. Becker, who was divorced by
her husband today. The decree was
granted to Becker after a settlement
with his wife, in which she agreed not
to contest.
Mrs. Becker tonight advised Young
women never to marry gamblers. and
blamed her troubles on the inherent
tendency of human nature to gamble
Tell girls, whoever they may be,
never to marry gambler" said Mrs
Becker, who is blonde and winner of
beauty contest, and the niece of r.
M. Sylvester. major and superinten-
dent of police of Washington st knew
when 1 married at Is that 1 should
not marry a gambler, but 1 got the
gambling fever myself and decided to
take a chance on the turn of the
wheel
II didn't take me long to learn that
any man is gambler to a greater or
lesser degree. The real gambler is
more so, but the spirit is within them
all.
When a man wins a woman and
he has her completely for himself he
has won the stakes for which he play-
ed, and he wants to gamble over
again.
Some men don't try second
| chance at the wheel of matrimony.
Most of them would, though, IL di-
vorce were more conventional, as it is
| fast becoming.
Then came our separation when
the wheel had stopped on the black.
and I knew 1 had lost."-St. Louis
| dispatch to the New York Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
AYHAWKER JOTS

Charlie Blakesley says a new song in
Fort Scott is entitled: What Are You
Going to Do When Missouri Goes
Dry?"
Love thy neighbor as myself. Prove
it by keeping your chickens at home
with our poultry netting" advertises a
merchant in Clyde.
An lola man may be pardoned for
feeling trifle sore. He paid $500 for a
barber shop not long ago on which an
mother man had an option for 1925
Something new in the way of show
recently at Garnett. 1t was a pin
shower. Now there was some point to
that.
Junction City proposes to hold a
Chautauqua assembly this year and the
persons back of 1t will probably have a
chance to display their talents in try
ing to make both ends of the affair
meet.
The only thing that now interferes
with the projected trolley line between
Coffeyville and Parsons is the money,
and the fear that town feeling may
burn up the rails If they are laid.
Ottawa Herald.
The election of Dan" Wagstaff as
police judge of Salina settles the fact
that history repeats itself" For
lima during the greater part of the Nine
tenth century.-Kansas City Times.
You are the only thing you own
said Bent Murdoch to a young friend
recently. You are your entire worldly
possession. And your life is the only
thing that you control. the only thing
for which you eare responsible. Do
something with it,
The board of regents of the agri-
cultural college have tried almost ev-
cry means to secure a president for the
school who will take charge when Pres
ident Nichols resignation takes effect,
and have not succeeded. With two
newspaper men on the board it seems
not out of place to suggest that they
try little lad" in the want col
umn.-Wichita Eagle.
A Central Branch editor writes:
When man asks a woman to marry
him she tells her mother, goes with
out gloves in zero weather to show off
her ring, makes a confidant of every
girl she knows in order that they may
have plenty of time in which to get UP
kitchen showers, etc. and keeps lin
gerie in the parlor in order to show it.
Still she falls over in a fit If the an
nouncement is made in the papers
Does anyone know why this modesty
that outshrieks the violet is displayed
IN regard to newspapers?"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24

OF the preparation of high crimes,
murders in particular, and in this re-
gard, there should not be any unfair
discrimination. there should be no
making of flesh of one and fowl of
another. If it is desirable that youth
ful criminals, who have repented and
who are intelligent enough to know
right from wrong. should be given a
new lease OF life after undergoing a
period of penal servitude of greater
or less extent, Jessie Morrison is as
much entitled to a Communication of her
sentence as have been any of the many
who have gone before her
In other respects, she is far more
deserving of pardon than several of
her more fortunate predecessors have
been. She. at least, had a reasonable
plea of self defense in connection with
the crime which she committed.
Other Kansas murderers who are en-
Joying the air of freedom never even
dreamed Of having such an excuse.
So strong was the case in her favor
that the jury which sat in the first
trial convicted her of such a lesser
degree of murder that the Judge i'm
posed on her a sentence of only five
years in prison. Her lawyers believed
that she did not deserve even that
much punishment, so they secured a
second trial. Then occurred a rather
unusual thing in criminal jurispru-
dence. The second jury found the
girl guilty of greater degree of the
crime of murder than did the first
jury and her sentence was fixed at
twenty-five years Imprisonment. 1t is
cor rx-ti oIa o6
serving.
Had the first verdict in her case
been accepted she would have been a
free woman long since. And for that
very reason it will strike most reason
able persons that she is actually en-
titled to executive clemency. Really
the question of the ethics of granting
pardons has little to do with her case.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

From the Chicago News
The early swimmer catches the
cramp.
A billposter knows his place. and
there he sticks.
Successful theatrical managers
should thank their stars
Mournful numbers-the balance on
the wrong side of the sheet.
The mosquito isn't a prohibitionfst.
yet he wants the bars removed
Time waits for no man. The only
chap who can beat IT is the musician.
If a woman wants to cut a mans
acquaintance she may look daggers at
him.
When there is work to be done the
buzzsaw is always ready to take a
hand.
Deaf people should enjoy better
health than others. a sthey do not
catch everything going.
Women read bargain advertisements
because they believe there is some
thing in store for them.
You may not be able to do great
things. but you can at least try to
do the small things in a great way.
Probably the easiest way to mark
table linen is to leave the baby and
a blackberry pie alone at the table,
for a few minutes.
A scientist says the cholera germ
looks like a comma. Possibly. but
when 1t gets into mans system II
is apt to put the final period to his
existence
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
His Drink Cure.

A certain Indianapolis lawyer, who
has good practice now, quit drink
ing whisky and beer and other intox-
icants, too, for that matter, two or
three years ago, and he didn't take
the Kelley cure, either. A German
saloonkeeper of whom the lawyer
bought most of his liquor administer
ed the cure, and 1t has been effective.
For several years the lawyer had
been buying nearly all Of his drinks
at this particular saloon. He paid his
bills there the same as he paid his
grocery bills. Finally the old saloon
keeper bought a house and lot, and
he employed another lawyer who new
er bought drinks to prepare the alb
stract and the deed and transact 9TH
er business in connection with the
deal. The lawyer who had been the
regular customer heard about it He
was filled with rage, and he went at
once to demand an explanation.
"Here!' he yelled as he leaned over
the bar and pointed an accusing fin
ger at the old German. 81 buy all my
drinks here. I have spent hundreds
of dollars in this place. And then the
very minute you have some work for
lawyer to do you go and employ
some one else. That's what you do
You go and, and
WELL" interrupted the old German
In the midst of the harangue of &C
cusation. when I got business, ]
want it done by a sober lawyer"
The offending lawyer turned and
walked out. and his friends say he has
drunk nothing stronger than coffee
Since.-Indianapolis News
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24

deal in the last two weeks said
Holloway, with pathetic emphasis. The
girl tapped her foot and said nothing.
In the meantime" he resumed, may
I ask, do you want that nickel or may
come over to your side and take you
down to dinner?"
mo, indeed; you may not--but I
suppose I'll have to take the nickel.
and as have to come over there to
get train home, you may meet me
downstairs and have the pleasure of
paying my fare for the last time"
Very well. But you can't prevent
my going out on the same train"
Il thought you were waiting for
some one?r
IT was waiting to see the chap you
were waiting for.
"Jealousi"
"I own it. Also, that is what allied
me two weeks ago.
You admit that?" asked the girl.
And all the rest-that you were
wrong about the whole thing?" she
asked again.
That 1 was wrong about the
whole thing said Holloway. 81 would
have told you that a week ago if you
had given me a. chance. Edith. was
a chump. and I'm no end sorry and
you are
"Dick. oh Dick." she interrupted.
come on over on my SIDE and I'll go
downtown to dinner with you
Copyrighted, 1909. by Associated Lit
erary. Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
GLOBE SIGHTS.
(From the Atchison Glob,


A worthless man is always a mis-
sionary for worthlessness, and spreads
his doctrine as widely as possible
We know a man who is mad all
the time because people eat lettuce
He hates it himself, and believes
others should.
We have observed. in a long life
time, that the fatter and more COM
Portable looking woman is, the bet
ter are her pancakes.
When man is treated mean by a
woman, other women are inclined to
think he is only getting what should
really be divided among several of his
sex.
We long to read a story wherein
the hero is an ordinary good fellow,
like many real men, instead of a milk
was not too good.
Every time we hear a funeral SER
mon mentioned. it is referred to as
al sermons are very unpopular may
be accepted as a fact.
A man was telling the other day
about a friend of his employed by the
government as a laborer. The man
gets S45 a month and board, and
works four hours day. That's an
other reason taxes are high.
The men say that a wife who loves
her husband uses her husbands name
on her visiting cards, thus: Mrs.
John Bertram Smith," but if she is
dissatisfied with married life, she has
her visiting cards engraved after this
fashion: Mae Ridgely Smith," (Note.
Her maiden name being Ridgely)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.

[From the Philadelphia Record.1
Jonah was the original f1oodoo.
The real Autocrat of the Breakfast
Table is the cook.
The man with a nervous wife
doesn't need any burglar alarm.
There are a few dishonest men who
are neither in Jail nor in politics.
Procrastination is the thief of time.
and most of US are receivers of stolen
goods.
The trouble with ready taIker
frequently is that he is such a poor
gutter
Every cloud may have silver lin
ing, but that fact isn't so important
as to get in out of the wet.
Every woman has a passion for the
bargain counter, and occasionally she
gets something she wants.
First Lawyer-'I asked the Judge
to try one of my cigars" Second Law
yer-"I'n bet he found 1t guilty"
Blobbs-"Bjones is going to start
a Turkish bath establishment next
door to a church" Slobbs-"What's
his idea ?'' enthusiastically told
him that cleanliness was next to god
Illness"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
dl:;:.gI,|,12,I]I)|
~@ cRB RUESa ~

Wroten ad Looie Linkenfusser, Re-
searchist.
Wiegehts, Looie: I dondt know
we're you iss ad, but hat a bunch dot
you ISIS somevere in der Yeast. / CAD
der der same from a recedt dispadge
concerning Mary und her Sleeps. You
vas always a dinger alder chessy-
nutses. und dis dispadge ISIS der prize.
Id Says dot Mary's lamb vas real.
Dot ISIS umportandt, uf true, aindt it?
In der vordss uf der poet,
Mary had a fiddle lamb,
OF vich der writer wrote
But dondt care a tinker's cuss,-
tink id vas goat.
But uf you und der oder members
uf der Idiocity Investigationary asso-
citation hat really discofered any eff
dence dot der animul in kvestion vas
der real ting,-chops, fries und ALL
uf you hat any piggled efidence on
egsibition, id ISIS time to come 'front.'
wards nit i'd. Id ISIS kvestion vich
hat upsettled nations and wrecked
homes. Uf you can proof your bosi-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24

ton, you will be recognized es der sal
ivator uf a suffering voildt. Der In
wentor uf short-sleefed underpanties
will nod be in i'd nit you. Anoder
smerious kvestion besides der realness
uf der Sleeps, ISIS. vot really
wroten der spassmodic fiddle epizoo-
die? Der dispadge sayss dot der fell
Ter vot wroten i'd dindt wroten i'd, but
dot noder Teller vot didn't wroten Id,
wroten it. Der smeriousness uf dis
kvestion ought to be plain, efen to der
condesity uf der noodle vich you wear
Fer gotsake, Looie. gedt bitzy und
find der anser. / candt sleep nit der
nights-time fer vorrymendt efer Id. /
catch myselluf sitting der dufferents
thought to moosic, und ge-changing
der fects und gas meter uf der orfchi-
nal poemtry, to Wit:
Mary hat a fiddle lamb
Vich vassndt exceedingly fat,
So she filled oop der beast
Nit hot vasser und yeast
Und vot do you know about that?
Hoping dis will find you der same,
I remaineseffer HANS
Young Misder Maxim hat invented
a. gun silencer, but der cranks iss
chumping all offer him aloud Id. Vot
he should did, ISIS to invent silen-
Ger to put on der Teller vich ISIS brac-
ticing on a trimbone.
Funny aboudt dot Niagra Fallss.
| Won bunch uf fellers ISIS trying to pre-
| serf Niagra, aldough der same baper
saws der Niagara ISIS in coldt storache.
Lasd year, Stubs vas trying to gedt
| Hoch to led Chessy Morrison oudt uf
der coop. Now, he sayss he VIII INK
aboudt id.
| Here ISIS someding else fer us to vor-
nv aboudt. Der scientists say dot der
shape uf der "big dipper' VIII be
! changed in a few millyunt years.
Chudging from der noosbapers. der
| preaching bitzness ISIS der hardest ting
| to gedt proper aftertising. but der
breacherss vondt gif oop, und score
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Few are the mistakes made which
cannot be readily rectifed.
y
It's much easier to make a living in
ways other than by writing poetry
X
The uglier the dog that is coming
along the prettier the girl is nearby.
If secrets are not designated as such
there is less chance that they will be
disclosed.
X X
With their hats and rats and other
things the girls may be pardoned
these days for being afraid of their
shadows.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-24
MAxINfs OF THE oID CoDGER.

MAXIMS OF THE OLD CODGER.
My son. it is well that you strike while the
iron is hot,
Provided, of course, that you know of the
task you have got;
Provided, also. that you know you're ham
mering with
And. lastly, provided that you're most
competent smith.
My son, it is well that you strike the nail
fair on the head,
Provided, of course that you strike not
your finger instead;
And furthermore into thine ear let this
wisdom be poured:
Be sure that you drive out the nail in an
other mans board.
My son. it is wise to be sure you hustle
ahead,
But, furthermore. son, by this counsel of
mine please be led:
Be sure that your rival is right-then with
earnestness grim
Go ahead till you lose every vestige and
shadow OF him.
Chicago Post.