The Washington times., 1909-04-18
SPINSTERS FAVOR
MAINE MOVEMENT
Pension for Maiden Ladies
Considered an Enlight-
ened Crusade.
TAX ON BACHELORS
TO FURNISH FUNDS
Last Clause Makes II Almost Un-
acceptable by Self-Respect-
ing "OId Maids"

-
which has recently been inaugurated IN
Maine. is one OF the most enlightened
crs3ades ever undertaken in this coun-
try Indeed, II sounds almost like a
Roosevelt reform: though If that gentle
man had had any say in the matter
the defect which is apparent in the bill
that has been introduced into the iegis-
lature OF the Northern State would not
have appeared in it.
The law as proposed is that a tax
shall be imposed on unmarried men Of
thirty years and upward for the bene-
at OF spinsters of forty years and up
wand who have never received a reas-
enable offer of marriage.
Now, the tast clause makes il per
fectly impossible for any self-respecting
spinster to accept the pension.
reaches the age of forty until she is
eighty and shows it: in the second
place, lives there a woman with soul
so dead that she would admit she had
never received an offer OF marriage; Is
there one with so little pride that she
would confess TO this mortifyinz fact?
I wot not
Spinster by Choice
heard sf an aged spinster only re-
Gently who. being very I'll and feeling
that she was approaching her last hour.
summoned the members of her family,
declaring that she had an important an
nouncement to make.
When they had arrived and the at
tention of all had been fixed upon her.
the dying woman. in a feeble whisper
which could hardly be heard, spoke
as follows:
Il want I'll to be remembered that I
could have married If 1 would 1 had
plenty of offers, but I preferred 10 re-
main single See that II Is placed upon
mlStombstone that I was a spinster by
ch8ce. And having uttered the last
VOID she fell back on her pillow and
passed away: but hers was a noble
effort TO justify herself.
The law In Maine should not be passed
IN the form in which It Is offered. 1t
should be amended to read: AN act TO
impose a tax on unmarried men of
thirty years and upward for the benefit
OF spinsters of uncertain age who have
zrom man whom they cared for suf-
hciently to accept"
Certainly no sovereign State would
have its women marry anyone who
asked them simply TO be married.
II is explained that by reasonable
oner Of marriage Is meant one from any
man who is not an inmate Of an insane
asylum or who has not even been con-
victed OF felony or an infamous crime.
Whiskers No Bar.
Nothing is said about a man who
wears whiskers or smokes an old pipe
Schopenhauer. or maintains always a
torbidding superiority OF manner, or has
an impossible nose-and yet could an
offer from such person be called d
reasonable One2
Better that a man commit a felony
than that he chew tobacco: infinitely
better that he have been an inmate OF
an insane asylum than that he be toe
addicted 10 the iniquitous highball.
Anyhow, no woman ever refused a
reasonable offer. The trouble with mos
women and all spinsters is that the mer
swho insisted upon marying them were
zhe ones whom they least wanted t.
marry. Some had strength steadfast,y
Ito refuse: the others weakly gave iT
1 after a long siege and married the
I wrong person. so that IT would really
l-be more sensible TO give = pension q
30 latter class than to the care-free
Kpinsters.
Pension Too Much.
The Maine Legislature offers spinstel
ladies 500 a year in lieu of a husband
II is too much. Half that sum would
more than com, .ansste. Indeed, it nigh
be argued tlat women already smiled
upon by fate sho-ld not be rewarded b.
the Legislature tNcause Of that fact
However, Legislaturemen are curious
cattle. and II they feel that to her whS
hath shall be given is good logic. le
them send along the 500 II is at leas
q sum sufficient TO buy an empire gown
IN WHICH peTGnGnGe the IdnCV OF EOIQt
rowing and discontented bachelor ma,
be caught, and shortly thereafter h
may be forever relieved OF paying tn
tax
II the Maine law goes into effect. am
man viii be exempt from taxation whC
has proposed three times either to tn,
same woman or TO different wcrnen. an,
been refused. I don't know how Il Is n
Maine. but II Is a poor old nOn-progres
siye man IN Maryland who has no
asked az least three girls TO marry hin
by the time ne has reached the age o
tWenty-one- II there IS any who hal
not, IL is because the first girl he aske,
hastily found Farson and married tn,
incautious one cut Of hand.
Cheap to Many.
There are come who have succeede,
in remaining bachelors who would fee
that small yearly tax would be
cheap price to pay for immunity from
household cares-immunity from hav
ing to remember 10 order coal. from
hooking frocks up the back, from dis
charging cooks, from criticsing ad
versely hats which look 70 them Tx
cOalhods. from attending bridge par
Aies and making the fires on days ol
which Bridget falls to put in an appear
ance.
There are dozens OF gentlemen VIII
would consider II cheap at the price an
who would not even attempt 70 deceiv
the authorities into believing they ha
made an effort to get married. but VIII
would glory in their shame.
II the Maine law Is properly amende
and IS passed. and If the fund raise
IS sufficient 10 make the few spinster
Of that State who admit they are fort
and have never been cOurted moder
ately happy, perhaps, there will be a
attempt made I'm Maryland to tax bach
elors. In this case, however. the fun
will have 20 be used for some 0the
purpose than supporting spinsters. be
cause there Is not a woman in tina
State who has not had many chance
OF marrying
1t is suggested, then, that II be ap
piled TO the maintenance Of worth
widows who have endured the tribula
tions Of welded life and still live [
tell the tale. LEOEORE CALVERT.