The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-12-26
TOTO Has 1Ny Besf Wnbes; Aho My
 Sympatb1es Says fbe Hotel Clerk
BY IRWIN S. COBB.

cut down to six and became practically a wdower.
 We come now to June. I spent most of June deciding, I remember, where I'd go in July. I didn't go anywhere in July. I think 1t was about the tenth of June or maybe the 11th, that I read a special dispatch from Huntsville, Ala, stating that the wife of a presiding el- der of the Methodist Episcopal church, south, named the Reverend Jordon, took a drink in the dark out of wet weather spring two years before and after sui fering intensely for many months had just been found to contain four of those little green summer lizards, all alive and doing well as could be expected under the circumstances. I also think there was war that broke out somewhere about that time and one of the reigning monarchs of Europe got killed or got married, or something of that sort. But I have only vague recollection of thoss matters because my mind was mostly interested in the dispatch from Hunts vile. Part of the time I was sympathiz- ing with the lady and part of the time with the lizards.
 And so June passed and July. and in August Dr. Cook came home by way of Denmark. In fact, if he hadn't come by way of Denmark I hardly think t'woud have been worth while for him 10 have come home at all. First twas his native guides that were going to prove It, but later on he retired to sanitarium and when pressed for the details he'd burst into tears so that you might say he's practically been depending for support on the firm of Nose Brothers-Esqui and Lacri
 September opened with Labor Day, closely followed by Commander Peary. noisy week, Larry. if you remember. uard fn-dn haN Nhr1n ranchman came on from South Dakota in answer to an advertisement printed in a matrimonial paper by lady describing herself as being young, unencumbered and wealthy, and before the rosy mists of fancy had been dissipated he found him. self hooked up in the holy bonds of we'd lock to large. suuare-toed bride. born in Sweden, with an estate consisting of nine small children and picture of Clusters Last Rally. This was carried in full in the papers under the head of Romantic Union of Western Million aire. Most of the theatres opened with new plays followed by frosts ThatTl do for September.
 Tn October. or Moth Ball Moon as the North American Indians poetically termed it. we suffered from acute revival of the Ancient Greek school of classic dan- cling. There's not much I can say for the ancient Greeks as dancers, except that they nad the courage or lnelr con- victions They feared neither chlblains in the winter nor poison ivy in the sum mer A number of distinguished foreign musicians, vocal and hand-operators also honored us with their presence. I heard one of them. Russian violnist 1t was, at any orgy called recital You've heard the expression, Larry, 'as nt as fiddler Wcll I know now which fiddle it was that had the ht was there when 1t had 1t. An abdominal operation was per formed on 1t by this here Russian and it's screams certainly were pitiful to hear
 Early in November Tammany start ed to win the election and Minister Crane started to China. Minister Crane made the better showing of the two--all that happened to him was having his ivory, as the saying is
 Thanksgiving day came On the sAme date that it was predicted for. and the United States court requested the Stand ard oil company to kindly dissolve, as special favor. some day when 1t had nothing particular to do. Strains of low derisve laughter by John D. Archbod. November was . poor month for traNng in stocks and margins. being similar in this respect to 10 or H. other months of the last year. But 1t was swell month for large financial movements involving theuss of large wads of ready scads. dedication of the New theatre. the open ing of the bids for the Moving-J sffries- Ptcturss-Johnson light and the mar