The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-07-11

we Have With Us Tonight by sam ueI G. Blythe. .(IIenry Altemus Co.)
 MT. Blythe, the gentleman who is ae- credited with producing, among other bright things for the Saturday Evening Post. weekly, the Who's Who and Why or Oughtn't To Be in This Country" or something like that, has sent. out through Altemus Co. a winner in the way of a laugh-produeer A winner for the men; 1t is not probable that the ladies Will howl with glee over we Have With Us Tonight But there is hardly any man of any business or social pretenses who has not suffered at banquet, when the toasts'' began, similar to that case, ridle- ulously described by MT. Blythe in the book heretofore mentioned.
 Nearly all of us, that is, of the male persuasion, have learned by dearly bought experience that the surest and most seleh- tihc way to spend d wretcheo evening and a great deal worse morrow (beeause you will not be able to forget dtD Is to be 'among those present" at a large public dinner And yet these big dinners continue, from S1 per plate up to Slo ana beyond, and no one has (oefofe MT Blythe) been willing or had the telner1ty' so 1t seems, to give the aWtu oore away. a But MT. Blythe has done the work all right He has broken a spell (even a con- tugation) or twoi he blurts out the whole truth and upsets the whole row or oaDy carriages. In this one little book MT Blythe has taken revenge for all our past wrongs that we may have suffereo at the hands of fellow diners who had some thing in their chest they were compelled to turn loose, and worse-did so. Ihose criminals are all In MT. Blythe's DOOR, and he lines them up in the stocks, plliory and straight jacket something like tnls a4afxT n giving a banquet. The diners have had their food hurled at them and have hurried 1t into them. long and imposing toast list had been prepared and the speakers are at the head table trying not 10 ap- pear self-conscious. Cigars are lighted The orchestra Is playing The Merry Widow A few of the younger set are humming along with the tune. The ladies have arrived in the gallery. The toast master rises, taps with the gaVel, glances around the room and smiles compiaeently. There Is a great noise of chairs being shifted so everybody can face the heao table. The toastmasteT suaghtehs HIS le' pats his shirt bosom and begins"
 Fever move your chair like that 10 'Prepare to Receive Cavalry on many "auspicous' occasions?
 Or listen to the fat toastmaster who didn't know what he wanted to say ana couldn't say it. if he did, and was not worth hearing anyway?
 Ever been bored by the local Judge Bolus," who was down for a hefty toast, who talks in circles, spheres and ngure eights, and who made you wonder how he ever got his job?
 S Do you recall the local Charlie Cutie" that awful bore, that tiresome person who from his remarks at the banquet you knew he must have formerly been a census enumerator in the grave yard Of jokes?
 Then MT. Skinnem your local bank CT, whose success in life is largely due to the fact that he has never smiled or seen a joke. He is the one whose speech usually consists of a 20-page, closely printed article read in a dronng voice from "The Bankers Magazine.
 And then the local near-poet "Childers," another alleged funny man, who Is fol- lowed by Congressman McGun' and Senator Butt" for whom MT. Blythe has and uses adeptly his longest har- poon; the senator" who spurts colored fire till he is purple cred, white and blue) in the face and drags the poor banquet CTS to the verge of a collapse.
 "We Have With Us Tonight is a win ner. This reviewer loaned the book to a man who hasn't smiled or permitted himself to see a joke in 20 years by the clock The book was returned by the aforesaid kill-joy, who said In erect that he hadn't laughed as much in 20 years
 
 is the severest test this reviewer knows. You will thoroughly enjoy We Have With Us Tonight"
 "Uncle Gregory" by George sandeman.
 co. P. Putnam's Sons)
 This Is very unusual novel. You are likely if you are addicted to "best sell ers," an awful disease, by the way, to not enthuse as you really should over "Uncle Gregory"
 "Uncle Gregory" who has recently died before the book opens-which was just as well; for dead we have enough Of him-leaves a preposterous will directing the carrying out of all kinds of unwel- come improving, educational schemes and the writing of a monumental biography of himself. This work was primarily left to his granddaughter, Vera Capes, who had married Jack French. Vera and the supposed writer who tells the story are the only direct descendants of "Un- rle Cfregory's' family. Vera had Just been married when Uncle Gregory died; her honeymoon becomes Immediately overshadowed and gloomy by the carry ing out of the old mans will, particu- larly the preparation of the biographical sketch referred to.
 The man who tells the story was in St. Petersburg when the work under taken by MT. and Mrs French was be- coming to them a nightmare. So this cousin was sent TOT ana tne pooh peBlnS with his arrival in England and long de- scriptions of what "Uncle Gregory" was. intended to be and was not
 Apart from the love story woven in ii the book is really vivid picture of a modern type that is not without obvious resemblance to living, present-day nota- Utilities of the same breed who now have a place-in the public eye.
 "Uncle Gregory" was successful bank CT of immesaureable wealth, a sectarian, an efficient" man. obstinately philan-