davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Trouble Ahead.

'.This happened to me. and I want to publish 1t as warning to other mar ried men said business man the other day. ..l was busy at the office until late, and there dropped in uuex pectedly friend whom I hadn't seen for some time Of course we ilnme- diately adjourned te popular Chest nut street cafe. where we set 'em up couple of times. Then my friend in- sisted 1t was due Us to have dinner right where we were. Well 1 had said was coming home to dinner, so l knew there would he explanations coming if tried to break that of. but I also knew that tlsere would he more if l dkn't let the wife know. Any how. marched to the telephone, which hung conveniently near. and called up my house. As soon as I heard my wife at the other end l pa thetically murmured: Can't get home to dinner. dear: I'm crowded with work at the office and will stay late There was silence for second, and then nearly threw fit. My wife an- swered back firmly. Well. of course. believe you, and we will not wait din ner. but when you get home you'll have to explain to me how they hap pen to have an orchestra in your of flee .'"-Philadelphia Record.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
A Noiseiess City In Friesland.

Fancy city of 35.o00 inhabitants. gultless of street cars and omnibuses Nhe steam tram line from Franeker halts discreetly without the town, easily encompassed in an hour. for its singel. it's old meat which 1t has not yet greatly overstepped is not three miles in extent: city without great noise or confusion. save upon market days. and clean. quiet streets. lined by low houses with shining windows. peopied by rosy checked serving wom- en. capped with gold and lace. and demurely dressed. grave faced citizens. Send red sailed boats to its very heart until masts are jumbled with electric light poles and church towers; plant tensely feliaeed trees beside it's quays and few iron railed flower beds in it's open squares; give it water gir- ,lle thronged with hundreds of boats, crossed by few bridges and many little hand ferries-and you will see Ieeuwarden.- Scribner's Magazine.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
He Liked the Sound.

Mir Golf has humor peculiarly his own. He looks at the world in half amused. half indulgent manner some times very annoying to his friends One day when in town he dropped into a restaurant for lunch. It was a tidy although not a pretentious estab- lishment. After a good meal he called to tine waitress and inquired what kind of pie could be had
 "Applepiemincepier raisinpieblueberry- piecustardpiepeachp N berry shorteake.. the young woman repeated glibiy
 Will you please say that again?' he asked. leaning a trifie forward
 The girl went through the list at lightning rate "Andstraw wberrss short cake" she concluded. wish emphasis
 "Would you mind doing it once morc?" he said.
 The waitress looked her disgust and started ia third time. pronouncing the words in a dehantly clear tone.
 .Fhank you" he remarked when she had finished Fer the life of me | can't see how you do il. But I like to hear it. It's very interesting. very Give me apple pie please. and thank you very much. .''-Youths Companion.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Misery in Stomach

Why not start now-today, and for ever rid yourself of Stomach trouble and Indigestion? A dieted stomach gets the blues and grumbies. Give it . good eat, then take Pape's Diapep. sin to start the digestive juices work ing. There will be no dyspepsia or belching of Gas or eructations of undi- gested food; no feeling like lump of lead in the stomach or heartburn, sick headache and Dizziness, and your food will not ferment and poison your breath with nauseous edors.
 Pape's Diapepsin costs only 5O cents for large ease al any drug store here, and. will relieve the most obstinate case of Indigestion and Upset Stomach in five minutes.
 There is nothing else better to take Gas from Stomach and cleanse the stomach and intestines, and besides, one trianguie will digest and prepare for assimilation into the blood all your food the same as sound, healthy stomach would do it.
 When Diapepsin works, your stom- ach rests--gets itself in order, cleans up-and then yeu feel like eating when you come to the table, and what you eat will do you good.
 Absolute relief from all Stomach Misery k waiting for you A soon as you decide to begin taking Diapepsin. Tell your druggist that you want Pape's Diapepsin, because you want to be thoroughly cured oi Indigestion.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
A Ready Medico.

"While I was waiting to take the order of merchant in a small town fin Indiana" said the dry goods drum mer. sI went prowling about his store. and.a box fell against me. I regarded it as trife at the time. but an hour later l felt severe pain in my side. l have always been afraid of appendi- citis, and 1t occurred to me that 1t had come on to me bigeer'n house. Away l rushed to the village doctor, and he felt of my pulse. looked at my tongue and shook his head and said:
 My friend, you've got 1t this time for sure
 "'And I've got to be operated on?' asked.
 ''Nou shouldn't lose minute
 "With that I took off my coat and vest to have look at the spot. and q minute later l was surprised and pleased man. X splinter from the box was sticking in my side. looked from the splinter to the doctor and back, and he looked from tie splinter to me and back. Then asked
 "'necfor how much to payY'
 ".Five dollars he replied.
 ".But now do you make that outY'
 .1we and q half apiece for being the two biggest fools in the state.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22

Aunt Ahiatha You mustn't judge him from first appearances. Jack was little queer today. don't know what was the matter with him. But we'll have him in often. and you must be polite to him. Gwendolyn.s And that was how a most audacious courtship came 10 be carried on fight under Aunt Abiatha's eyes
 -Gwendolyn." asked Jack dreamiiy one sunny morning as they sat to- gether in the fragrant rose garden. '.how did you ever happen to come down to this quiet little spot anyhow ! I should inns zine you'd love sll the gay things of life-danees. theaters. din- ners and all that. you know. Don't you?'
 "No. you're all wrong answered Gwendolyn slowly. hiding her face in the flowers she had gathered. T love something quite different" For few minutes the birds fin the garden had it all to themselves. so suddenly still were the two people who sat there. "Gwendolyn." Jack finally found himself asking in a husky voice quite unlike his own. do you really love it down here--the quiet. lazy life we leadF''
 Gwendolyn nodded. but did not lift her face
 Love 1t enough to stay with me. dearest?'
 Gwendelyn nodded again.
 Look up at me. you fraud" Jack comma nded. taking her joyfully into his arms.
 "I can't" Gwendolyn protested. blinking There's something in my eye"
 "Oh. let me get 1t out. sweetheart" implored Jack sympathetieally. What 1t it. darling?"
 "A tear, think confessed the mis- chievous Gwradoiyn.
 Half an hour later Jack sat talking with Aunt Abiatha on the porch. Gwen dolyn was scribbling her daily line to her mother
 Read that. Aunt Abiatha." the girl called suddenly, holding out a sheet of nete paper "It has something about you in it.''
 And this is what the astenished Aunt Abiatha read;
 Dearest Mother and Dad-I want you to come down here just as quickly you can. I am to be married al Aunt Aba- thas two weeks from today The we'd ding will be very quiet. Aunt Abiatha fully approves of my engagement--in fact. she has done everything in her power 10 bring il about. Please bring my trous- seau along with you. Your loving
 CiWENpOLYN.
 P. S.-Hs name Is Jack Montgomery Heyward. and he's just nice his name. can cook and sew and dust. G.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Asks Us to Print

To relieve the worst forms of Rheu- matism, take a teaspoonful of the fol- lowing mixture after each meal and at bedtime:
 Fluid Extract Dandelion, one-half ounce; Compound kargon, one ounce; Compound Syrup Sarsaparilla, three ounces.
 These harmless ingredients can be obtained from our home druggists, and are easily mixed by shaking them well in a bottle. Relief Is generally felt from the first few doses.
 This prescription forces the clogged- up, inactive kidneys to filter and strain from the blood the poisonous waste matter and uric acid. which causes Rheumatism.
 As Rheumatism is not only the most painful and torturous disease, but dan gerous to life, this simple recipe will no doubt be greatly yalued by many sufferers here at home, who should al once prepare the mixture to get this relief.
 It Is said that a person who would take this prescription regularly, dose or two daily, or even few times week, would never have serious Kid ney or Urinary disorders or Rhenma- tism-
 Gut this out and preserve 1t. Good Rheumatism prescriptions which real ly relieve are scarce, indeed, and when y0n need il, you want it badly.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
A Friend Tn Need.

Tn the Hungarian parlia mentary ses- sion of 1s41 a certain Baron Szjel lived in Prcssburg with two intimate friends. George Majlath and Barthel Szemere One day the baron became envious of their iaurels- He called Szemere aside and said to him, My good Szemere. write me speech" Most willingly. my dear friend About what would you like to speak? ?" '.It Is all the same to me, if the speech is only a nice one-wonderfully nice" You will be satisfied with me" he answered and next day brought the manuscript. The baron memorized the speech and delivered 1t on the third day. The chamber re- echoed with "visas" and applause At this moment the president rose and asked ..Is anybody here 10 answer this speeehf" The baron looked sneer- lngly around. The members all re- mained silent. Then BarfholeHaens Szefnere arose. He began, Worthy gentlemen, what the orator said is from beginning to end incorrect" And then he began to show. in an able speech. the mistakes the baron had made. Don't veB believe him. gen tlerenr the baron cried angrily. in- terEupsiaT him suddenly. Tt was he himself vho wrote the speech for me 2 Every sae uf tbe ffty-two members rolled in his seat nearly eonvulsed wl5h laughter. and then and there the baron Gaa1e a VOW never again to speak in public.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Would chanae the Bill.

A repertoire company was walking into small town. says the Saturday Evening Post. where they were billed te play Romeo and Juliet" The lead ing man approached the manager. who etrede moodily ahead on the ties.
 '.Bass.- he said. live got to have l5 cents"
 Fifteen cents" growled the man ager. You're always yelling for mon ey. What do you want l5 cents forg'
 What do 1 want 15 cents forf" re- peated the leading man bitterly 'I want il for a shave. that's what l want iHfor. l can't play Romeo with five days black beard on my face"'
 'oh. well.' said the manager. you won't get no 15 cents. Wen change the bill to 'Othello.'"
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
The - Scrap Book
suspieieus.

Admiral Robley h. Evans told this story against himself He had con gressman for q guest, but had almost run out of his favorite brand of whis- ky and had stocked up with some thing he could not guarantee. He ex- nlained this and added. Here. howev- CT. is some brandy that I've kept un- touched for a good deal more than twenty years"
 Just hand me the whisky decan- ter" was the reply.
 Why. said the admiral. whats the matter with the brandyT'
 That's just what l want to know, Bob said the guest, But if you have haG it untouched in your posses sion for more than twenty years there must be something pretty bad the mat ter with it!'
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Work Wsakens The kidneys
Dosn's Kidney Pins Have Done Great Service for People Who Work in
 Putnam.

Most Putnam people work every day in some strained, unnatural position bending constantly over desk-rid- ing on iolting wagons or cars--doing iaborious housework; lifting, reaching or pulling, or trying the back in hum dred and one other ways. All these strains tend to wear, weaken and In. jure the kidneys until they fall behind from the blood. Doan's K d iey Pills cure sick kidneys, put new strength in bad backs Putnam cures prove il.
 Mrs. Albert Latourelle. 6S Smith street, Putnam, Conn.,, isays: "My husband was troubled for long time with kidney complaint. He had such acute pains in his back that he could hardly get around. He was also bothered by dizzy spells and too ire quent action of the kidney secretions. Deans Kidney Pills procured al Ores seris drug store absolutely cured him and he has never failed to recommend them since when an opportunity has occurred. He has been practically free from kidney complaint during the past several years and he gives Deans kid ney Pills the eredit.n
 For sale by all dealers. Price 90 cents. Foster. Milbum to-, Buffalo, New York, sole agent for the United States.
 Remember the name-Doan sand ake no other.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Reosntlx5lneapaoitated.

There were some deficiencies in the early education of Mrs. Donahoe. but she never mentioned them or admitted their existence. "Will you sign your name hereg. said the young lawyer whom Mrs. Denahoe bad asked to draw up q deed transferring parcel of land to her daughter.
 'sYeu sign yoursilf. an I'll make me mark" said the old woman quickly. ''Since me eyes gave out I'm not able to write Il wurrd. young man"
 How do you spell il :" he asked. pen poised aboye the proper space.
 spell 1t whativer way you plaze.' said Mrs Donahoe recklessly. since I lost me teeth there's not a wurrd in the wurrld 1 can spell
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
 1t Wasn't Catchinu.

kindergarten teacher tells the fol lowing:
 1'ne rules require when n child re ports illness in the family that the teacher shall find out whether such Illness is contagious or not. and 1t is customary to send the child home for a statement of facts. One morning one of the younger boys reported that his mamma was sick" He was sent home to find out the nature of the illness and soon returned with the information:
 Mamma says 1t ain't catching"
 That won't do." replied the teacher. You must go home and find out and then come and tell me just what is the matter with your mamma.
 Pretty soon the boy came toddling back into the room Teacher" said he mamma says it's All right She says it's boy and 1t ain't catching"
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
The Mystery.

That awful shadow Of some unseen power Floats. though unseen. amongst us. wis., itinS
 This various world with inconstaut wing As summer winds that creep from flower 10 flower. Like moonheams that behind some piny mountain shower. 1t visits with inconstanf glance Each human heart and countenanee. Like hnes and harmonies of evening. Like clouds in starlight widely spread. Like memory of music fled Like aught that for its grace may be Dear and yet dearer for its mystery
 Percy Rysshe Shelley.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22

man. who bossted that he could tena sheep with any of them. He received . big drove to herd and returned at the end of the month.
 Do you want me to herd sheeps" he asked of his employer
 Do want you to herd seeepr' said the latter. Why. what did l hire you fors
 We'll said the herder calmly. If you want me to keep on henlia ,em you'll have to get me another drove. cause them l had is all gone.'.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
A Crushino Climax.

One of the stories of Private John Allen of Mississippi was about the ex. perienees of certain Major Blank of Mississippi. Major Blank tried for years to secure a Democratic nomina- tion to congress. but signaliy failed each time. Finally he turned Repub. nomination. He made "whirlwind tour" of his district and felt confident of the result. When the returns were counted it was found that Major Blank had received just two votes. And the next day the maJer was arrested on the charge of repeating"
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
In Sections.

In the spring of 1895 the disiin guished Dutch novelist known by the pcn name of Maarfen Martens WIS eiecfed an honorary member of the Authors club of New York. says the Bookman. When the name Joost Ma rius NJ. Van der Poorten-Schwartz came to the attention of the member ship committee there was gasp of astonishment. Finally the late Bill Nye came to the rescue with the sng gestion that the first haif of the name should be acted en at once. but that the last half should be held over until the autumn, when the weather would be cool.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
The Soul.

Each soul is world fin which all good is accessible and all evil possible Each soul is also battlefield in which the vast hosts of good and evil folly and wisdom. are forever Ut war. The individual is an auteerat. an emperor, q czar, who can advance at will the standard of right or wrong within his own soul.-0rlando Jay Smith.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
The Lioht That Does Not Fail.

II is grand to look forward and see the heavens brighten with the dawn of new day. but there never yet was light upon the sky which was not meant to illuminate the ground about our feet and show each of us his bit of work waiting for him there.-George Adam Smith
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
He Knew Them.

Things have gone completely to the dogs with me-
 Cheer up They might have been worse
 Don't you believe it"
 Why"
 Because then they would have been"
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22

.Suffered day and night the torment Of itching piles Nothing helped me until l used Doan's Ointment. IL cured me permanentiy.h .h-Hon. John K. Garrett. Mayor, Gifard, Ala.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22

Harsh physics react, weaken the bo- wels cause chronic constipation. Doan $ Reguiets operate easily, tone the stom- ach, cure constipation. zoc, Ask your druggist for them.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22
Hs Wanted More.

A prominent western sheep raiser ran short of hands and hired green
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22


 brane resulting from Catarrh and drives away aGold in the ilead quickly. Restores the Senses of Taste and Smell. Full size 90 cts. at Druggists or by mail. Liquid Cream Balm for use in atomizers 75 cts. Ely Brothers. 56 Warren Street. Now York. Ntatos't Of Probate held ai Thompson with "A in and fer ths district of Thompson on tue 10th day Of Deermhrr 1908.
 Present. ttrorge < Crosby, Judge Estate of Irving l. Hosle late of Maiden, MaSs.. with real estate in Connectieui, in said district deeeased.
 The ExecuIor having made written appli. cation to said court. in aceordtnee with the statute, for au order of sale ai the whole part of The real esae nescribed the ein, Ii Is ordered thai said nrpl,cafiou be heard Ht Inc Probate Otfiee In ihompson oa the 2tih dny of December, 1908, ai 10 o'clock in the forenoon, and that nottc. thereof he piyen, by in,rriing q copy of thi- order in the Puinam Patriot, newspaper having circulation lD said District and that re- turn made 10 this iourf
 Attest,
 5i-s2. GEosGE x. CRoSBP, Judge.
Putnam patriot., 1909-01-22

TO EI A. . ~sA kad igs HzE AssB bcQn 's.;- lAzZ<M
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-07-22
PERSONALS.

Texter Lamb has gone north on a
visit.
Otto Weisman and son Wilfred OF
Chicago are visiting in the city with
relatives
Mr.. and Mrs Sam Miller leave today
for Boston and other eastern points.
They expect to be home on August a.
Mr.. and Mrs. Palmer Trimble and
daughter will leave Friday night for
Puget Sound and Pacific coast points
Miss Martha Wallace Jones Of Kan
sas City, Mo-, Is visiting her aunt,
Mrs. p. A. Leighton and Mrs. Grace
Brownell.
+. M. Daman Of 1904 Reid street re-
turned home last evening from Dem
yer, Colo, where he has been visiting
his son. Two grand children returned
with him.
w. G. Sharretts. formerly of this
city, now claim agent of the c.. B. &
@. at Chicago passed through the city
this morning and was greeting old ac-
quaintances.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-07-22
CITY NEWS.

a meeting OF the committee OF
the whole council was held this after
noon at the Mississippi Coal and Ice
Company at the foot of Johnson street.
Nauvoo independent: P. j. Kier-
an and w. M. Alexander arrived in the
city Sunday afternoon and departed
again Monday night for New York,
where an important meeting is to be
held today The surveyors are still at
work and 1t will take two weeks more
to complete the preliminary survey.
They are now working in the vicinity
OF Powellton and going south toward
Carthage
Ft Madison Democrat: In ex-
cavating for the cellar and foundation
OF the new residence to be built by
]. G. Johnson on the east side of
Cedar street, between Third and
Fourth streets, the workmen found a
genuine Indian pipe of the peculiar red
stone habitually used by our red
brothers in the old days for such art
icles. The pipe was found lying next
to foundation wall of the old build
ing that was removed recently to
make room for the modern structure,
about two feet under ground. Wheth-
er it was dropped there by an Indian
watching the building of the wall,
which was put in over sixty years ago,
or by one of the workmen engaged in
the laying of the wall, it is, of course,
impossible to say, but the chances are
that the loss occurred in one Of tae
two ways mentioned. Certain it is
that the pipe is of genuine Indian
make.
The result of the balloting for Of
ficers of the Odd Fellows grand lodge
of Iowa which was held in June by
the various lodges was as follows:
Grand master, D. B. Gum, Red Oak;
deputy grand master, H. G. Ring, Ce-
dar Rapids; grand warden, S. Steven
son Council Bluffs; grand secretary,
r. L. 1ilton, Des Moines; grand treas
urer, A. e Hindorf, Newton; grand
representative, l.. w. Smith, Des
Moines. The grand encampment Off
GERS elected were: Grand patriarch,
Louis Sillberstein, Creston;, grand
high priest, w. c. Chaplin, Union;
grand senior warden, ]. e. McGinty,
Knowlton; grand scribe, R. L. Tilton,
Des Moines; grand treasurer, f. A..
Lusk. Ida Grove, and grand represent
tative, A. A. Montgomery, Stuart.
Regarding the man who died in
Fort Madison after being mangled
by Santa Fe train and over whose
death Coroner Korschgen went up
this morning to hold an inquest, pa
per OF that place says: A Mexican
laborer by the name Of Jesus Alver-
ez, aged 81 years, was struck by a
train near Lomax, H., yesterday after
noon, injuring him SO severely that it
was necessary to amputste his right
leg at the hip and his left arm at the
shoulder He was taken to the Santa
Fe hospital, where the operation was
performed. The shock was too great,
however, and he died at 1920 last
night. The body was taken to o. r.
Johnston's undertaking rooms and
will be buried at Oakland cemetery.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-07-22
CITY NEWS.

The funeral of the late Edwin
Graham was held this afternoon from
the undertaking parlors OF Crimmins
and Chase at 4 o'clock, the services
being in charge of the G. A. r. post.
lnterment was made in the National
cemetery.
People from Keokuk, Ham lton,
Canton, and La Grange should take adj
vantage Of the special rates offered on
the Keokuk for next Sunday. Monday,
Tuesday and Wednesday,.