davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1909-04-15
.DISAPP0INTMEN IN
Results Is Unheard Of in The
Use Of the
Il
ARNOLD MASSAGE VIBRATOR

Letters Of testimony are In our mails daily
telling us Of the wonderful results obtained by
the use Of the Arnold Massage vibrator.
One lady writes Of the immense relief she has
obtained from sciatica.
Another that 1t is streastheniaG her serves
daily.
Another that her headaches are fast disappe,r-
Ing.
A esAtleman writes thar he ha bess relieved
from acute indigestion.
a half dozen whom Il II bene1ting Cor deaf
ness caused By eatarh.
prominent society lady says she has had
backsche for two years; used plasters, medicines
ana everything that has been susgestcd. The
Arnold Massage vibrator IL the only thing that
has ever proved successful 10 relieving her.
Why csnuot we prevail on you to come and
get . FREE TREATMENT with this WONDER
TUL MACHfNEI
You do not have to wait in Doubt
One short treatuest win convisee the most
skepticai.
Should you be unable to come. send your ad-
dress and We will send competent demonstrates
to your homo without any cost to you.
REMEMBER
That the factory has ordered us duriag this IN
troductory sale to redues the price from $500
to $3.50.
The Arnold Massage vibrator Il now os sale
and being demonstrated at
Evening star., 1909-04-15

Beveridge Urges Tariff Commission.
Both Senators Beveridge OF Indiana and
La Toilette Of Wisconsin had tariff COM
mission bills to present today and as
soon as Mr.. Aldrich and Mr.. Bailey fin
ished their dialogue, they were on their
feet to hand them In. They had to wait
few moments. however while the sec
retary read President Taft's special mes
sage on the Philippine tariff.
Then, much to the disappointment Of
Mr. La Toilette. Mr.. Beveridge was rec
Indiana senator took advantage Of the
occasion and had a few things to say
in favor Of his proposition. He had not
introduced 1t. he said, as an amendment
to the tariff bill. but wanted 1t to go to
the finance comittee. and hoped thmat ia
vorable action would be taken upon 4.
He remarked that no fiscal measure in
the last quarter OF q century had had the
support OF SO many commercial bodies as
his BILL nor had any such measure had
the approval of SO large proportion Of
the press of the country since the civil
war. 1t had meyer been opposed in any
public address. and all opposition to It.,
according to Mr.. Beveridge. was confined
to cloakroom conversation. Mr.. Beveridge
then told the Senate that he would deliver
speech upon his bill at later date.
When Mr.. La Toilette got the floor he
introduced his bill and had nothing to
say about 1t whatever. except to ask that
it be referred to the finance committee,
which was done.
A number of senator's on both sides
of the chamber presented amendments
to be proposed to the tariff bill next
week. Among these amendments was one
by Senator Cummins of Iowa to extend
the reciprocal provisions of the present
law. Mr. Cummins is the author OF the
so-called Iowa Idea" in tariff legisla-
tion.
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

successful treatment for either OF
his inhrmaties, but when his eyes
are opened, and his deaf ears un-
stopped this present sorrow caused
by what we call death will be an
added Joy in the real life
Miss Addie Hogenboom, of West
field, New York, is spending the
winter with Mrs. Thatcher and
daughter. She is an expert in
shampooing and manicuring, and
is doing satisfactory work.
On account of illness J. H. Young
Our veteran speaker, was unable to
appear on Sunday afternoon. All
hope his indisposition will be tran
cient. He fought for his country
in days that tried mems souls. He
has been standing for freedom OF
thought and expression for long
wears He has always realized
that the moral value of any move
ment of reformatory character IS
determined by the life force OF a
community or nation in which it
finds action and so he has helped
70 register on the dial of evolution
that which has been moral I'M
pulse to those who know him by
word or pen.
, Our home choir, with Mrs
Harris as pianist, consists OF Mrs
Pratt, Mr.. Ballard Earl Slater and
DR.. Critchley. They sing from
our hvmnal sweet songs that touch
the soul, and the audience JOIN IN
Mrs Clark Kelsey offered the in
vocation and President Hilllgos'
asked Mr.. Hubbard TO be the tlrs
: s. Gaker. He spoke in an ener
thetlt iiin .ii % re progress OF OH
pllnlcltary way 70 the mornnlg
address OF Rev. Mr. Blocker at the
Baptist church that morning in
Lake Helen, and was optimistic as
to the outcome of religious thought
now viewed from different angles
Of vision.
DR.. Gould also an old Vermont
worker, made an address full of the
courage of his convictions and
faith in the fruiticn Of oul work.
He linked the earthly and the
heavenly until one could hardly
reparate the two. 1t is said, They
best hear the angels sing, who
listen to earth's signs DR.. Gould
as we'll as Mr.. Hubbard is deeply
interested in a camp at Queen City
Park, Vermont.
Major E. R. Hopkins, of Brook
lyn, was the next speaker. He
reviewed lie progress of Spiritual
ism and in a way contrasted the
past and the present. The Major
always acts the military man, and
even in citizens dress reminds US OF
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22
CAMP CASSADAGA.

The past week has been pusy
one at the camp. The sound of
the saw and hammer is part OF
the amusement of the place, for 1t
tells it's story Of growth and inn
provement.
We find upon the Cassadaga
register the following new arrivals;
B. F. Morris, Warren, Pa, A. A.
Sargent Barrie, VT; Mrs. $ {.
WILDER, New York, N. Y; Major
E. R. Hopkins and wife, Brooklyn,
N. Y. w. N. Wilson, Youngstown,
Ohio; C. V. Wallace, NJ. D., Youngs
town. Ohio; Mrs. n. a. Bishop,
Fayville, Mass
Mr. H A. Burlington and wife,
of Springfield, Mass, arrived on
Sunday evening, and were vel
coined by their many friends. Mr..
Burlington has long published book
and periodicals under the name OF
Star Publishing Company, Spring
field, Mass.
: Mr.. and Mrs. Miller, of Big Run
Pa are located with Mr. and Mrs
; Frank Johnson outside the gates
They are to build winter home
here.
r Many of the solid men of thu
, North have an eye for this locality
especially when they try the eli
Il mate for a winter.
DR.. Babcock and wife enter
u tanned Mrs. MacGarvey, Mrs.
= Palmer, Mrs, living, of Cassadaga
J. and Mrs. Arthur Pelton and Mrs
Adams and Mt. and Mrs. E. W
: Bond. of Lake Helen, on Tuesda,
taker. Mrs. Clark and Mrs living
OF Saturday afternoon and evening
Particular interest centers upon
our Friday afternoons at the Ba-
zaar on account of the character
readings given by our Gipsey,
with her cup with the signs of the
Zodiac upon it and our gifted palm
list, Miss Bowman. They are much
sought for. and meanwhile the sale
of aprons, handkerchiefs, beads
and many fancy articles is going on
Our Lady Of the Rose Garden is
also secretary of the Ladies Auxili-
airy and has charge of the bazaar
The many friends of Mr.. and
Mrs. Smith Baker, of Kansas City,
Mo-, are greatly shocked to hear of
the recent passing away Of Mrs.
Baker. They were expected at
Hotel Webster again this winter.
Mary Marsh Baker was a fluent
writer, ready speaker. One OF
her books. Ruby Dana" is a
most charming book, and her
poems were stories of the soul.
She was a woman whose interest in
all reforms was marked by her
sense of justice and her characters
were many. All will extend their
sympathies to Mr. Baker, who
stands alone now in one sense, but
never alone in the true sense. Mrs.
Baker has two sisters, Mrs. Com
stock and Mrs, Hughes, who are
both here. At ? o'clock this morn
ing Mrs Comstock awakened Mrs.
Hughes and said Sister Mary is
dead; saw the notice in kansas
City paper So they were both
looking for the telegram which
~ turt.rter Was it a dream,
xM especially t'-~S Hughes will re-
~ They have
Mr.,
Kept ia Cola
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

w. l., would settle the suit tor
damages without going to court.
Mr.. Jacques left on Saturday and
will return as soon as possible
The following items were kindly
contributed by Mrs. Adams,
Miss Sellcott, of Virginia, came
Friday to spend some time at the
Webster house.
Ed Brown went to Coronado
Saturday, returning Monday.
Plat Richards came over from
DeLand to work on the new school
house.
Prof Mccall, one day last week,
emphasized the rules of the school
by administering corporal punish
ment upon seven beligerents.
Mr. and Mrs. Will Andres offer
their charming home for sale
Mr.. Andres recently passed the
civil service examination with the
creditable standing of ga 10
He has in view a responsible gov
eminent position in Florida tol
which he is admirably qualified
Mrs. Barnes, Mr.. and Mrs. Hale
and a niece are guests of Mrs
Whitaker at Hillpatty.
T. P. Mace has the contract To-
building the new school house II
the colored settlement. Its dlmen
sions are 24X36. The old schoo
building was sold and the new on
is to occupy the same site, Schoo
is to begin early in February
There is an unfortunate condition
or management existing in man,
localities of the South that ex
c,,,d cnio~.,d ol;'i. ~ F~"'' p. e.
to supply the colored schools, but
how can colored pupils qualify for
teachers if deprived Of even the
opportunities of the public schools!
The ignorant class are not the best
citizens. For the advantage of
every community every class should
be given a chance for education.
The trunk containing advertising
matter for the Harlan Hotel. which
started fro Lake Helen with Mrs.
Jacques, has been located in port
in Jamaica, by the transportation
companies that were required to
meet the damages
Mrs. Adams chaperoned the
party at ldlewild, and three other
young ladies to Blue Spring Friday
Mrs. Sears and daughter and
Miss Smith, of Geneva, N. Y, are
at the Granville. Miss Sears will
be remembered with pleasure as
the painter of exquisite flower
pictures here three years ageo
Mr. Howard and family. of De-
Land, have moved into one of Mrs.
Newton's cottages. Mr. Howard
is a blacksmith in the employ of
the Bond Company
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

The Peerless Leader. --,a.-
Jennings Bryan. will deli, lldress
in the university auditorium on Satur-
day. February E. Besides being one OF
the best known men in the world,
Bryan stands as the leader in the
United States as an orator The uni.
versity and the people OF Volusia
county are especially fortunate in
securing this event, for which the Ly.
ceum Committee deserves great credit.
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

WINGED they were in
Heaven bless both the ID.
the. gray
The writer was then called TO.
ward and made a short address.
President Hilligoss, speaking OF
the persistency of righteousness,
cited an instance that for nine
years has occurred and is still
occurring at CincinnatIs large
Icourt house. A little woman dres-
sed in black with luminous face
and pleading eyes will daily 60
| from room to room at that great
structure and ask lawyers and
Judges and whoever she may meet
that seem to belong there, "Wlll
my case come on today And
4 ~ tell her no, not today, and 90
= x; tire OF her for they know her
stot, we'll how at the sudden
death of her husband the home
( they were paying and praying Tor
twas gotten away from her and hci
troubl, disturbed her mind on the
lone thing until she became mild
insane, but is always hoping
the redemption of her home.
pathizing friends have had e
money pledged to more Ih'
it at its real worth but the
keeps raising the price soA
really no chance for her\
ideal is there. Hope W
building its ladder, a
planning and smilir
asking Will my
;, duy'' Some b.;
will corle on, on today
. .iUrlc "i'i =. .'i.n-- .au'
. Sc COS sinned5; I'VE all NAV
The writer would be
reproduce the story as it .,,r
but that is impossible, -
duced an impression that,
soon be forgotten. ,ck
The evening services
Quoted by Mrs. Cla
assisted by Mr.. Hubba
Miss Addie Hoganb
superior magnetic hea
Thatcher's cottage,
daga, and will Civ
She will also do >sh
manicuring at reaso
Mrs. c. /
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

NC go Vic
an He is not to be over
looked if he is not very tall
Mr.. John Wiley arrived on Satur-
cav from Bloomington, ILL.,, and
has rooms in his house which is
coupled by Mr.. Powell and family
Mr.. Chas. Armstrong spent Sum
cav at home. He is working at
l:spanola in the mill
Mrs Clarkson is enjoying visit
I'm her sister during Mr.. C.'s
bsence.
The annual business meeting OF
the Ladies Aid Society met at Mrs.
Todd's home on Thursday With
he exception of vice-president all
,ttcers were reelected. AS Mrs
&caver is living in the north this
inter, Mrs. Zanders was elected
fill the office of vice-presldent.
The Saturday afternoon train
,,n the east was delayed by the
,aking of the connecting rod in
engine. Claude Burch, the
man, was in the way, and sus-
nod a bruised hip.
Iaster Cecil Wood, aged twelve
j. is spending the winter at the
20 pm sas prize in draw
4 offered by magazine
II is also a fine penlnan
;r'rida twenty Of our young
1. - tended the laet camp
BaptA had . fine time.
pssSrl ,noxsDstsot stetson' subs st
was nv re Rev NJ Rloc''"r n 'h'
US" and presented many new
and helpful thoughts in a torceful
manner |
Rev. Marsh preached a special
sermon at the Congregational
church last Sunday, on the Power
of Love" 1t was closely listerned
to and highly appreciated by the
congregation. |
N Mr.. and Mrs. Butoff arrived last
week and are in their pleasant
1me on Euclid avenue
b. Freeman Brazeau lett on
axsiosaCvba. where he wall
Is. Quigley have re-
ffSQN Daytona and are
M Mrs. Quigley's parents,
EAMrs. Butotf.
af thur Pelton spent few
X It week in DeLand, the
* $. Berlin Wright.
* hubbard, Pelton and
r. taEir.hipping cabbage, let
X Have vberries, as we'll as
& losing wand adjacent mar
* We Ike a rose in the
upon whie the gardens IN
X We havee air down there
can be pure. spicy odors OF
H We havi our boys say
X we offer for ssnoment they
Is We nave Ugh pine land
h Hotel, which c&h ct the hat
~ We have many otlH
3SVI XAT G01
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

t offered by a magazine
II is also a fine pentnan'
twenty of Our young
Tended the la,t camp
had . fine time
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22
MD. FLA.

those WHO IIldTCIi
and did their best. btASSSSSS
vinced they were in
Heaven bless both the ID.
the. gray {
The writer was then called TO-. (
...o.l 4 .,,nIo n cEOrt address, q
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22

= = aSxl2 So
- 81 j -lelen
DeLand news. [volume] (DeLand, Volusia County, Fla.) 190?-1921, 1909-01-22
THE prLAND NEWS, DpLAND, FLAN {
Tin Ware at the s and 10.

Is Photos at the Ping Pong Stutl
a quarter. ~Ay
Garden seeds, the kind to plant now,
a large variety for your inspection at
Fishers Drug Store.
We are glad to learn that Rev. Mr.,
Oates engagement, in England, 5
only ior the summer, and that he ex.
poets to return to this country in the
fall
Accuracy is our watchword Every
ingredient entering your prescription
is checked by an assistant before leav
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

In Miss Juliet Bred0n's book about
her uncle. Sir Robert Hart. the grand
old man Of China. for many years
in charge Of the imperial customs serv-
Ice. Is the following story:
Zone OF the most influential Of sir
Roberts Chinese friends was the great
Ii Hung Chang The diplomat liked
LIS household because Of the simple
ity he found there-nO wearisuine
courses at dinner. but fsh and perhaps
a dish Of chicken with rice. Incan-
tiOusiy. AZ il turned cut he praised this
frugallty to his own Chinese servant,
for the remark reached LIS ears in a
distorted form. Next time Sir Robert
went there he had TO face grand GER
emOnial banquet.
"'You shall not have the chance to
90 away again and say that you have
been fed like eooly In my house.
said the vicerOy proudly at the end
Of the banquet
Nevertheless the very simplicity
Of your hospitality was what ! most
appreciated Sir Robert replied But
II you believe that could have made
any such remark and II you persist in
altering The style Of my reception |
shall not come TO lunch with you
again."
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
The Room Was Full.

Rev. Daniel ISaacs once aIighted at
an inn to stay the night. On asking
for bed he was told he could not
have one. aS. there was 10 be a bail
that evening and all the beds were
engaged
AT what time does the hail break
ups" asked Mr.. Isaacs.
about in the morning. sir"
"Weli. then. can have bed until
that time?'
Yes. certainly. but II the he'd II ask
ed for you will have to remove
Very we'll" replied Mr.. Isaacs. and
away he went 10 get between the
sheets.
About 3 IN the morning he was
awakened by loud knocking at his
chamber door
What do you want?' he asked.
How many are there of you in
there?" inquired voice.
There's me and Daniel and Mr..
Isaacs and an old Methodist preach
err" was the reply.
Then there's plenty of you" And
the speaker passed on. leaving Mr..
Isaacs to enjoy his bed.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
The EnaIishman.

Just as there is no being more dis
liked in his own country than the Ok
ford man who displays what is (most
unfairly described as the oxford man
ner, so there is nobody who does more
harm to our good name abroad than
the EngIishman who carries his iDsu-
lar conceit ali over the contInent-his
evident belief that the people. the
country and the institutions under his
understanding review are obviously
and painfully inferior to those he has
left behind him. That is the sort OF
optimism which has to be kicked out
of a man before he becomes a toler-
able citizen OF the world.-London Out
look.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
5sIated Logic.

"Put yourself In my place. young
man. Would yon want your only
daughter 70 marry a penniless YOUTH"
Put yourself in my place. sir
Would you want to remain a penni-
less youth when there are rich mems
daughters TO marry?"
"Yon confess. then that you marry
my child simply for her fathers
wealth?"
"And you confess that you withhold
her from me simply because Of my
povertyT'
what other reason do needg'
What other reason could influence
you?"
This talk is quite useless"
Quite
I'VE have nothing TO gain by It ~
Absolutely nothing"
You take II phiIosOphically."
"Why shouldn't /? Your daughter
and | were married quietly 4 month
ago"
"Great Scott"'-Puck.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
insanity In London.

COstermOnEers and engineers. one
notes. rival each other in heading the
list of maDiacs provided by the com
missioners in lunacy. IL you don't
want TO be mad. be a clergyman. You
will have about one TO a thousand
chance Of not dying in a lunatic asy-
lum. II is bit risky TO be literary
or scientific person. but IL you put
your science into practice and become
an engineer your prospect Of lunacy
jumps TO the top. with only coster-
mongers as your real rivals. Why
this is is a mystery. II can't be intel
lect or hurry. Costermongers do not
hurry. and they are not noticeably In
tellectual-London Chronicle.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

THE north pole may have been dis
covered and then again II may not, !"
remarked the home grown philosopher.
but there are at least three still great
er problems that I'm betting no man
will ever be able to solve"
What are theyY' asked the party
who was posing as an innocent by
stauder.
Perpetual motion. the square Of the
circle aud the heart o. woman" AN
swered the local philosophy dispenser.
Chicago News.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Knew Their Value.

'Sir," yelled the first mate above
the bowling OF the storm ''the ship Is
likely 10 sink at any minute"
Il know" replied the terror stricken
passenger. there Is no hope for u.s."
Then why don't you put ON life
preserverg'
I'm the manufacturer OF them. r.
Catholic Standard and Times
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Human Vanity.

why do you object 80 seriously 70
snapshot portraits OF yourself?''
Because answered Senator Sor-
ghum they violate all recognized
rules Of procedure What right has
any photographer TO take mans
picture without giving him the Gus
tomary ten minutes grace TO Fix his
necktie, brush his hair and arrange
a pleasant smile, - Washington Star.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Obituary Pome.

This Is the end OF the story,
whispered with bated breath.
The north pole sent this message:
I'm dying-tasked to death"
Denver Republican.
All, no. Not yet Is the story
Ended. By any means.
The tale will run. with pictures.
For years In the magazines.
-Harper's Weekly.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

was dining at a French restau-
hnd while he was slipping his
coffee and firing 500 glances to
inute at a girl In a fluffy pink
bite dress a stranger gracefully
hndeered his overcoat. He had
eached the door when the owner
him on the shoulder.
Rdon me. sir" he said meekly.
you'd you allow me to get an
cigar from my coat pocket in
do not meet you againT'-Tit-
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
WIZ She Went.

Styles What are you crying
dear?
StyIes-l'm crying because !
spend that $40 you gave me this
lg.
Styles--Well. you shouldn't cry
that You're better off not to
BENT it.
Styles No. I'm not. either. I
-YonkeFs. Statesman.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

An of8eer once asked Frederick the
Great f"r an Interview. which was
granted on cOndition that be only said
two words. He presented a petition.
sire be said. sign Frederick.
highly amused. surrendered.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

My frst word 70 all men and bows
who care 70 hear me Is. Don't get into
debt Starve and go to heaven. but
don't borrow. Don't buy things you
can't pay f0r.-John Ruskin.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Up Against II.

Beggar-Say. mister. would youse
give pore Teller dime ter save his
life?
Stranger should say not I'm an
undertaken Judge.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
cold sIaw.

skeeFy.
This long winter night Is so drearyi'
ship ahoy!' said the star,
Stay right where you are.
Here's Cook. And. great snakes. here
comes Peary!'
New York Life.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
cnn.nnt. Of the Mail.

Each day your way the postman floats.
Our minds with hope he fills.
A few get checks or friendly notes,
But most of us get bills.
Washington Star.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Deadly.

Myer-Try one OF these long cigars,
old man. They measure four TO the
yard.
Gyar-What yard-the graveyard
Chicago News.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
VIM sha Left.

did opportunity knock at your
door?
Yes, but the cook always main
tained that 1t wasn't her place to an
swer it."-Puck.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

Hank Stubbs-Amos Green says ez
how he allus pays ez be goes.
Bige Miller-W WAL. ef you'll notice.
Ame's chair bound most Nv the time
Boston Herald.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Yearly Occurrence.

5 only once that we return TO
said the solemn looking person
louS tones.
b guess you don't take a two
vacation" laughed the home
With the tan and scratches. Il
inches OF II in the old, home
very year st, Louis Repub-
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05

There was a young fellow named Clyde.
Who In a funeral procession was spyde.
When asked who was dead
lie grinned as he sead.
Don't know, / just came for the ryde''
Chicago News.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1909-11-05
Not Enounh 20 Hun.

Real humor never hurts"
Explained the speaker, solemn eyed.
Because there's not enough OF IL
To hurt" his friend replied.
kansas City TIn,as.