The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-12-03
Nothing Worse Than Bad Case
Of Grip, Says Masculine Victim
Not Believer In Germs-Everybody He Knew Prescribed
Something Nothing to Do But Worry Through It
BY DOLLY DALRYMPLE.

chloroform linament for my chest anti
phlogistine, mutton suet for my nose and
mustard plasters for my back"
Looks like some of those things would
have helped" I mildly suggested.
Mother wanted me to go to bed for
three days and take hot lemonade. She
said that was DR.. Osler's treatment" he
continued. AT least the three days
not the lemonade. 1 would have taken
that remedy, If the lemonade had been
spiked and heavily spiked at that-enough
to make me sleep through the three
days. In fact, I'd just like to get boil
ing, raving, tearing drunk and stay
drunk until this fendish cold let go of
me- he vowed.
How on earth did you catch itg' I
blandly inquired. "A germ"
Now, don't you dare" he shouted IT
don't believe In germs and I have no
idea where caught this cold, and I am
surprised at you being so bromide as to
ask"
1.-The place for you is at home," I said
as 1 saw his temper rising. "and the
sooner you get there the better 1t will
| be-"
Not on your life." was the quick re-
sponse "One of the best musical at
| fractions of the season Is booked here
this week and I've got tickets and I've
| got to so. One of my sisters has ad-
vised that I sniff gum camphor and
| take a little piece of 1t with me to the
musical, but don't care how independ-
| emit man is. he doesn't want to do
| such sissy thing as that, and besides
| my neighbors at the concert might not
| like gum camphor. can reconcile cam
| phor with golf or cricket or polo or
| bridge. but somehow can't help but
| think that camphor and music are in
| congrous. Think of It'll Chopin and cam
phori Chaminade and oamphori Ughl It
makes my flesh crawl to think Of It.
Then what are you going to do about
it?' I asked. "If you don't go home
and go to bed you won't get we'll In
| time to go to the musicale and then
| what?'
i've better scheme Than that" he
, chortled. 81 am going to give my cold
| away I am going to try to give It to
everybody with whom 1 come In contact
+, and
1T am the first7'' I asked. well. I
| call that about the meanest thing ever
| heard of. I'd be furious II 1 didn't know
| that I was exempt from the germs, be-
| cause we are standing In the open air
| and"
| IT told you once I didn't believe in
| germs" he Moderated.
| ''Then, pray tell me how you expect
| to give your cold to other people," I
| quietly asked.
"Oh, you women" he frowned- You
are so literal and you pin fellow down
| so, but Just the Same. germ or no germ,
| I am trying to give It away and I hope
| you've taken 1t. Then you can give it
| to somebody else and they'll pass it on
and soon everybody viii be weeping as I
| am and we'll gather together nice lit
| tie company whose lachrymal glands will
( be stimulated to unusual activity. Now
| I can get back to my office and feel
| that the work is started and try to con-
vince my stenographer that my money
! IS still intact, my finance not refractory
| and my scheme for spreading the grip
well under Roadway and that am much
better off than I was earlier In the
| morning"
''Brutev' I shrieked as I darted down
the street, hoping all sorts of awful
things would happen to this horrid
! mean man.