The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-08-24
DRIFTWooD

DRIFTWOOD
 South Carolina also makes e noise like puiverizsd moonshine. 4 Automobiles are getting common. place. People will soon be getting rid of 'em to buy airships.
 Georgia Legislature passed 2e4 bills. This will make the Alabama body ter- ribly jealous until 1t exceeds that num- Der.
 Montgomery is famous for her me artesian water. We are drinking more of 1t than formerly. but 1t Is wsil nigh impossible to get jag on 1t.
 Hartman has sailed for home. May his voyage not be as rough rs some of his railroad lines.
 who was too slow. Must have tipped him in advance.
 Louisville has had a deluge of grass hoppers. Oh. well. perhaps that's bet ter than having deluge of grass A movement is on foot to build good loads into Chattanooga. according to a Georgia paper. But what attraction has Chattanooga for GeorEiens now7 They come too late. Chattanooga ss thirst parior has been dry since July | Senator Aldrich wants to stop the issue of bank notes. They might as well have been stopped long ago SC far as some of us are concerned.
 The Misspuri courts have decided that surgeohs who sew up their instru. Ients nSn,i,s in patient. ,tsn are iia6le Well we not carry the instr,insnt or torture around among your innards.
 A doctor rec6mmends eating the skins of fruit The doc should be put on diet of green banana skfns. Then hes would change his tune we're aftes thinking. ...s - oryills Dry i.,, Wr % win only ny ia ..,,. Ger. knows one csn have a fly ttns In Ger dry Walter wellman has again failed Tn his dash for the pole ia an Airship. much national institutioE ss Christ he will try it again next year. \ A new 1910 model of auto is called "the undertaker's friend" Ii ws gre. not mistaken they are all called that.
 Harry Thaw has written a story to prove that he Is not Insane. A poor way to demonstrate it. Harry. Must authors poets. etc, are considered 'Hinder cracked" uhdsr the lid.
 An Atlanta bachelor has beeu arrest- ed for wife beating. Whose wife lie was beating. however. is not stated. Alfonso has grown fun set Of sids however the first chance they get. to play with who ,kncwss
 Tire Alabama ,I.eEislaturs. which IA trying to legislate us into Heaven. might truthfully bs termed the state Irrigation congresa."
 Haven't forgotten an Afric.n aunta, by the name of T. Roosevelt, !ats Pras- ident of the United st,ttss. have youi One doesn't hear much of him these days.
 The Alabama Legislature" says The Houston Post. "nay go SD far as td feel devilish when his wifo lsavas for the summer"
 How strange to read a cable dispatch 
 heaviest enowstoryn ot years is falling. And people in Alabafaa can't woAr n collar with any degree of comfort, ow. ing to th" deGrHes Of heat.
 John D. Rockefeller says the ons ain, of his life has been to Inake sure os Heaven. And yet that man would have forced the wise virgins to have filled their lamps with Standard oil had he been living in that day.
 Parson Snowfall sings to his favor'ta fruit; Goodbye. Watermelon,
 It's time fo' you to go. You'se filled my heaht wid sunsliinI
 An kept off tcahs an woe. If me an you should meet next yeah
 I'd des say "Howdy do?" An den I'd try 10 masticate
 De sweet red heaht ob you.
 While the Birds sirg Love.
 white as srowfiakrs in the night While the Lady Moon is finging her
 long veil of misty white. While the bright eyes of you, sweet
 heart, are beaming with delight The birds seem a singing of Love. While the breezes whisper secrets ta
 the little blushirR rosgs. While the humble bee Is nodding on her
 breast in sweet reposs, While your checks blush sweet red
 blushes as I hold YOU ever close. The birds seem a singing of Love.
 --P. H. A.
 Phil Armstrong gives us Alabama in verse. which sparkles like diamond on the. bosom of an angel -Moulton Advertiser. Did you know that Phtl Armstrong, editor of "Driftwood" in The Montgor11- e"v Advertiser Is a true wit D. Hunts. vile Tribune.
 WEATHER BUREAU PRAISED.