New-York tribune., 1909-02-07
WHAT Is CHARM?
The Judge, the Doctor and the
Young Girl Giue Their Opinions.
What is charm?"

What is charn?''
The Girl who wasn't Out Yet asked the ques-
ton II was a weekend party in the country
and everybody was having tea before the big fire
place Nobody answered for a minute Then the
Young Man said decisively:
Charm Is what a woman had better be dead
than be without"
.rF3It what is charrn?" repeated the Girl.
THE most charming young woman I know be-
gan the Grayhaired Matron, after another silence.
isn't pretty is she very clever She Is quiet
Eho has no special talentsshes not at all the sort
OF girl who shines. But everybody is glad when
she comes and sorry when she goes. When I've
beer with her feel so rested. She never jars. l
believe that Is the secret. She remembers your
senslbilities-and II you hurt hers she doesn't let
you know. She thinks about you-not about her
self she's interested in you, not Obtrusively, but
when she asks you how you listens to your
account Of your babys last prank or how your last
books selling you feel that she cares; il isn't just
po-Ir51ess. l believe that Is the secret Of charm"
That's all right" said the Young Man, but
I'll wager that your charming girl has low, sweet
voice and a pretty smile and q gentle way Of NOV
ing about
yes. she has" admitted the Grayhaired Matron
Those possessions IN themselves make a woman
charming" said the Young Man. whereas she
may have the loveest disposition in the world but
If her voice is raucous and she bumps into things
when she moves she'll never strike you as chaFIh-
ing woman.
THAT'S partly true" said the Old Professor
But surface looks and don't constitute
charm. either. There must be the two things-the
sweetness Of nature and the vehicle that VIII eA-
press that sweetness without any rasping.'
Don't clothes have anything to DO with charm?
asked the Girl who wasn't Out Yet. in rather
small voice.
.Ofran they have q great deal to do with it,"
said the sweet-faced spiaster. eAphaticaliy Ihere
are 4 few people who can be charming IN ugly
riotbes but they are very few. met Milly Hoyt
the other day, and she seemed sort Of sulHy and
awkward. I thought to myself, Miily is getting
disagreeabIe'-and then it dawned upon me What
The matter was. Il vas her gown-hideously ur-
becorning and she knew It. and not being spirit
uaIlv minded which one is nowadays she
couldn't bear up under II The next day saw
her in q becoming gown, and-why, she had DIoouneo
out. The knowledge that she was good TO look upon
filled her with sunshine, and she shed It upon
every one about her"
And pretty clothes a charm in themselves
said a Very Young Man in the corner, bashfulIy-
And good grooming-daintily cared for hands,
an exquisite skin, beautifully oTushed marian
these constitute charm"
''I always have supposed" said the Girl VINO
wasn't Out Yet. that I'm not beautiful-on' l
know I'm not so don't you try to be polite and
tell me that AMI supposed that never couIo
hope to be charming. But some one told me yes
terday that lack of beauty wasn't bar
IT IS not" said the who wrote stories /
think sometimes that beauty is an enemy TO charm
Don't misunderstood Ine-beauty itself is a charm
q very great charm. But when g woman knows
her beauty well and lets IT make her arrogant
It destroys any other sort Of charm in her The
plain woman, II she be sensible, does what plain
woman I know did early in her life She said to
herself: No one will admire me for my eyes.
nv hair-nly looks, in short-and yet I do want
to be admIred-to be liked She set herself to
cultivate the qualities that would wtn-genteness,
thoughtfulness, caring for the comfort Of others
She cultivated her talent-rnusc; and 1t S~as
always at the service of others. She kept her
speaking voice sweet and low. Her very knowl-
edge of her lack Of beauty gave her certain
humility that charm itself And that
woman was a deal more loved and sought after
than more than one beauty I've known"
ITO my mind, observed the Old Judge from his
corner, truth is a wonan's great charTl-When
she has it. Very few have Too many women
resort 10 fabrications-whits nes-whenever II
suits their convenience. When I meet a woman
upon whom I can depend for simple. straightfor-
ward fraDkness. I place her name in my heart
The truth judge" shrieked the young married
woman. What, always tell the truth when your
friend asks YOU how her dress fits. when
"Oh. one must have tact" smiled the Judge.
And better be frank I should say. even in the
serious case you adduce. Your friend might De
very grateful TO have you point out, in your own
gentle way the wrinkle in the back Of which she
didn't know"
Charm is repose" remarked the Doctor. You
never hear {, charming woman say, oh dear I'm
so nervous'-for she knows that that sort OF thing
gets on other peoples nerves"
Charm IS never speaking Ill Of other women"
said the Grandmother. Il heard renowned man
say, long ago, that II women knew how men dis
like 10 hear a woman say unkind things about
other women they'd never do IL It's an unwise
habit for most nice men have some chivalry. and
that chvalry is sure be aroused in favor Of the
woman who is magned"
well said the Rather Old Girl. sadly, all my
life I've practiced the recipes you've been giving
for charm I've tried avoid sandering my Sis
ters: I've shaved myself 10 death for other peo-
pies charity fairs, and made 1t rule to look rapt-
1IrousIv interested as I listened to bOres; and no
one ever called me charming. It's opinion that
charm is a matter of temperament 1t is an inde-
Enable magnetism which the beloved Of the gods
are born with. and if you're not born with 1t you
must Just jog along without"
Don't be so pessimistic,' urged the Grandmoth-
er, gently. There many kinds of charm, and
some kinds can be acquired"