The Cairo bulletin., 1909-03-11

there had been an ordinance, its viola.
ton would have made out for you a
prima facie case, and then, II you'd
been killed. why you could get to the
jury. and the jury would render you a
first-class verdict. But as it is"
Alderman Barnes rose. "There'll be
an ordinance" he Numbered, and
don't you forget it,"
He was right Alderman Barnes was
not alderman for just nothing. He. a
property owner, would take the init
alive. At three meetings he hammered
away at the common council and
when at the fourth meeting. in his en-.
thusiasm, he dlsrobed in part and ex-
hibited his bruises, and dwelt upon his
pain and suffering. the common coun.
ell smiled behind their hands, but
cayed in.
The ordinance was passed BY its
terms ii was to take effect immediate
ly. BY It's terms. no matter how
severe a snowfall, the owner of prop.
orty, occupied. vacant or unimproved,
must clean his sidewalk. BY its terms
the owner who disregarded its iniunc-
ton was sibiect to fine of $40
for the first offense, s25 for the sec
ond offense, and 500 for the third
offense.
"And now, Wen see said Alderman
Barnes. And from that moment he
went up and down the city Of Mon
roe like a roaring, raging lion. seek.
ing whom he might fall upon and de
your. "I'll make this overgrown town
an up-to-date city before get through"
he said.
Then the alderman procured blank
complaint, and filled 1t out against the
unknown owner of the property where
his mishap had befallen him. an in
famous person of the name and fame
of Doe. He swore to It,
when you find him." he told a po
lice; "I'll appear against him. See?'
One day an officer was shown up
into his room. The officer touched
his cap
You're wanted at the Fourth pre-
cinct, sorr," he announced. He was
going to say more, but the alderman
hushed him up
"Pll 60" yelled the alderman. In
feverish haste he prepared for the
journey. In feverish haste he got in
to a cab that he had ordered for the
trip.
Go on" he cried to the cabby the
sooner we get there the better. Now,
he whispered to himself. "Ill get even
with the owner of that property
He could hardly wait for the cab to
stop at the station, so anxious was he
to get out. He rushed into the pres
ence of the sergeant. who glanced at
him curlously
mir. Barnes?" he queried The al
derman nodded.
mr., Barnes" went on the sergeant.
and there seemed TO be a maevolent
tone in his voice, you are brought
here upon a charge"
ITO make a charge" corrected the
alderman.
Upon a charge" repeated the ser
geant. "of serious nature You are
charged with violating the cidewalk
ordinance. What have you to say?
How do you plead?"
"W-what?' roared Alderman
Barnes, me? Why. you idiot, cane
here to make charge. That's "hat
you sent for me for
The sergeant smiled and his smile
was baleful. y sent for you to take
YOU into custody" he answered, you
are arrested, Mr. Barnes"
Alderman Barnes took a fresh hold
on himself He was not only disap-
pointed that they had not found the
man he was after, but he was also
chagrned that anybody should sus-
pcct him of the violation OF the law
which was his own creation.
IAN right. Mr. Sergeant" he said,
with fine sarcasm oozing from every
pore, fire ahead. Who is the com
plainant against me?'
Here is The complaint" went on
the sergeant, "you have a right to read
it, If you will" :
Alderman Barnes read it--once-
twice--thrice He pinched himself TO
make sure he was not dreaming, He
glanced at the members of the force
to be sure that they were not insane.
Sergeant" he said, you must
think I'm a fool. This is my CON-
plant. that swore to myself"
The sergeant nodded lndifferently.
II noticed" he said, that the com
plainant's name was Barnes. But that
don't cut any ice with us. There are
200 harnesses in Monroe. The point is
that you're Alderman Barnes, and that
A lderman Barnes Is tile owner OF lot
On Division avenue. and the owner OF
his lot violated the sidewalk ordi-
nance and-there YOU are
And then Alderman Barnes wilted- |
wilted hard and fast Lord" he |
I'D forgotten that / owned |
any LOT in Division avenue Lord. !
what a FIX. TO slip down on my own
To violate the ordinance
against myself Gee whiz."
lie turned to the sergeant and |