The Durham recorder. [volume] (Durham, N.C.) 1879-19??, 1909-07-15
A Mothef-in-lAw's
Experiment.
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When James Burton married he In
vited his mother.in-law to live with
him and his wife. She accepted. Both
promised to refrain from putting IN"
When the nrst born came hundred
new complications arose. Az q young
husband he had never before had an
infant In his arms and had never real
~ seen above dozen Of the nuisances
at close range. but he felt that be need
ed no advice from grandma When
he set out with spoon and castor oil to
doctor the kid for . dozen things at
once the mother-in-law had to make
few remarks-she Just had to.
There were occasions when the IA
Their would carry the sQuahing young
ster about head mp. head down, over
his shoulder and under his arm and
pay no heed to the protests OF his
wife or the looks Of the mother-in-iaw.
There were other occasions when he
would ding It into the lap Of the old
lady and expect her to walk the door
with 1t for half the night. In return
she would visit the druggist next day.
walking into the store with an iron
Jaw, but somehow she could never ask
for arsenic or strychnine. The words
always stuck. and she ended OF by
asking for soda water with sarsapa-
rilla strip. There were happy hours.
however. There were hours when the
mother-in-law and son-in-law sat down
and told each other that II surely must
have been the work Of Providence 10
bring them together. They almost
held hands over It. They felt Just
pride in realizing that they were the
only mother-in-law and son-in-law on
the face Of the wide earth that ever
lived in the same house and loved each
other.
A crisis must eventually come in the
happiest family. One came in this.
It came one day after the mother-in.
law had carried In Q ton Of coal and
beaten two carpets. On the same day
the son-in-law had discovered that the
old lady was in the habit Of coming
downstairs at midnight and cooking
herself late supper. There were nc
words over either circumstance. On
the contrary. they sat and smiled al
each other and purred like two kittens
| She was informed that but for hef
presence in the house life would have
held little or nothing for the man be-
fore her, and she reciprocated By say
ing that she never knew what that
complacency and contentment meant
until she made her home with him
1t was q feeling hour. The fountains
Of the deep were broken up. and
neither felt ashamed Of the tears In
their eyes nor their qu'rering lips
Next morning both were missing. On
q stand In bis bedroom and on thu
bureau In her bedroom the distracted
wife found eDistieS The one from the
husband read:
Il invited my mother-in-law 10 pasI
the rest Of her days with me and con
tribute to our happiness. I had always
held TO the theory that the wffe'l
mother, particularly II she had an iror
jaw and a mind Of her own. could rem
der the little woodtine cottage Of hei
son-in-law q paradise on earth. Mer
argued with me In vain. When Thu
opportunity came tried H. Their,
was to be no butting In on the othei
side. Il was TO be one long. happ,
day. IL has been. 90 to my rewart
simply because I can't send her I,
hers. Ever since her first week in thu
said woodbine I have never for nj
hour been clear Of thoughts Of muir
der. They have always been thought
Of numbering q mother-in-law. In I'm
agination I have given her nine diff
ferent poisons; Eve times ! have dis
membered her with the ar: eight time
have I stolen upstairs at midnight b
choke her 10 death with my stronl
fingers. I have hired chauneurs b
try to run over her. and I have re
moved the steps from the cellar stair
In hopes to precipftate her TO the e
ment and break her back.
I'm conclusion let me say the state
ment went on. "as she refuses 20 di
for me I have decided to die for her
We have grown to be too happy. Tn
deadly monotony has come, and
haven't the strength to endure II. M
cold body win be found hanging In III
wood shed. Love TO you and the ki
and any number Of best regards to th
dear old lady. know she viii mour
me-
The letter Of the mother was equal
interesting.
When Jon read this, my dear daugt
ter" she began. 'the body Of you
mother VIII be found at the bottom Q
Grsy's min pond. I have been thinl
ing Of taking this step for long tim,
have been 10 happy with my son-ir
Law. That Asppiness has begun I
pail. Thin: Of having a son.in.ls'
and jet be bound By the most solem
promise not to call him a brute, q Vi
lain and n wretch dozen times q daJ
Think Of bow I have had TO keep u
hands Oh him when I fairy schsd I
wash them IN his blood Think Of "a
sleeplcss hours I have spent IN criI
. ping and hanging ana murdsTin
him In imasinationl I believe that