davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

There are many reasons why we should
not expect a great deal OF turkey on
Thanksgiving Day. but it really had not
occurred to US that appendicitis among
the birds is primarily responsible for the
sad situation.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
In GnIn Attire.

From the Buffalo News
We have made no careful count, but
from the headlines we believe that more
towns have been In Gala Attire" since
Mr.. Taft began his swing around the
circle than have risen "Phoenix-like from
their ashes" in all history.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Mr.. CampbeIPs Test.

From the Topeka State Journal.
Congressman Phil Campbell only accompanied
President Taft on a small portion of his recent
journey and yet he returned home suffering from
p.omaine poisoning and Congressman Phil is a
pretty husky individual, at that
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
MIR. Wilson and battle shIps.

From the Buffalo Express
Secretary Wilson says that the country now spends
SS.Co.o0 year in experiment work FOR the benefit
Of the farms which is twice the cost Of a battle
ship But probably he could proftably spend an
other 10000 on the work Of his department
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
A Doubtful Proposition.

From the Kansas City Times
A vacuum cleaner would be the thing
TO get the cobwebs out OF the brain Of
the man who still thinks the foreigner
pays the tariff tax.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
The President's REORGANIZATION.

From tho Philadelphia Public Ledger.
President Taft forgot TO issue a Thanksgiving
proclamation on schedule time. He had been 70
50 many turkey and pumpkin pic dinners lately
that he may have thought the august occasion had
been celebrated.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Surgeons report the case OF a man
whose heart is incased in bony
growth says the Detroit Free Press.
We hasten to inform our "insurgent'
friends that # Is neither Mr.. AIdrich nor
Uncle joe
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Mr.. CInrk,s Pronhecr.

From the Detroit News.
Champ Clark says that the next House viii have
a Democratic majority Of 100. But what good viii
that do the country Il the new Democratic Con
gresslnen are as suhservient 10 the interests as
many Of tho present members?
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

We do not know where the suggestion OF
Judson c. Harmon for Justice Peckham's
place on the Supreme bench originated.
but If we had to guess. we fear we should
say in the Commoner.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Automobile hearses ara 10 be employed
IN 81. Louis. AS between the old-fash-
ioned honk-honk horns and the new
tangled obejoyful trillers. however, we
think the former the preferable attach
ment for automobile hearses.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

A Texas contemporary carries a stock
headline reading, short Paragraphs
Briefly Told" You have TO be even more
explicit in Texas at times than you do
in Missouri
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Mr.. Champ Clark IS out on the Chautau-
qua circuit carrying the next House OF
Representatives unanimously for the
Democrats This IS the open season for
Democratic victories, however
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Where Iwnornncr 7, BIi...

From the Kansas City Times.
A state food commissioner explains how
to tell butter from oleo. If one can't tell
the difference, why not buy oleo?
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
PEOPLE AND THINGS


- - MWANEN
Sir Benjamin Stone. N. p. is the only
member OF Commons who is a photog-
rapher He has collected over 10000
photographs Of the most vivid personal
interest, and fully half OF them are his
own work. When first he went to West
Minister. old-fashioned members regarded
the enterprise with misgiving. but when
the finished pictures Of the House were
seen. everybody welcomed Sir Benjamin
and his camera as integral parts Of the
establishment. Private apartments were
cheerfully thrown open to him; constaoles
watched over his long-expOsure work
with enthusiastic care. Cabinet ministers
gave him sittings; he had only 10 ask for
facilities and they were Immediately
granted. When the body Of Mr. Clad
stone was lying in state in Westminster
Hall, the people were excluded for twenty
minutes so that he could take a picture
Of the scene In one busy session he
made group studies OF every member Of
the press gallery. and every member OF
the staff.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

From The Indianapolis News.
Wen. anyhow. Secretary BaIlinrer has conserved
another 5000 acres q water power rights. And, By
the way. the action vas taken without waiting for
decisive legislation on the subject.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
CHAT OF THE FORUM.


From the Boston Herald
The table upon which President Taft planted BIS
feet in Hartford was only four feet by two. II
well constructed that is large enough platform
for any man.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
MIR. Cannon and MIR. Ridder.

From the New York sun
What Mr.. Cannon understood was that Il Her
Ridder got cheap paper Mr.. Cannon should have
the support q the press Herr Ridder denies Il
He says 1T IS ridiculous" Il is ridiculous.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
He Certainly Did.

Il have Just been reading about
Montaigne."
What about him?"
''He said that whenever he saw a good
thing he annexed tt
We'll" remarked the saturnine press
humorist, he had the right idea for
running a humorous column"
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

We believe we could be Just as truly
thankful on Thanksgiving Day If not a
game or football were played throughout
the entire country-perhaps a little more
thankful, indeed.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Seldom Does.

'The last merger he attempted was an
utter failure"
'As to how?"
He tried 10 combine business with
pleasure, but II wouldn't go"
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
WaIst-Iine Woes.

When YOU would put your dexter fin
Around a miss,
There's nothing Ike a pesky pin
To spoil the bliss
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

'Tt does look like tho hookworm was
on It's last legs, says the Atlanta
Journal The Houston Post VIII indorse
the form OF this expression, II not the
substance thereof
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Radium is considerably cheaper than
formerly. Still. at It's present prlce-S2,-
10000 per ounee-a mighty little radium
has to be made 10 go a long way.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Senator Dick seems determined TO make
Ohio believe he has a record 10 stand
on, even II he has 10 furnish the people
microscopes with which TO see It.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Very UnusunI.

Well. ours IS real romance. at any
rate"
That is very nica"
Yes; Ferdy tells mo that I am posi-
lively the first girl he has loved this
season"
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Under False CoIors.

I understand I gave an alias when I
got arrested last night I hope I didn't
use the name OF any OF my friends"
You didn't You told the desk sergeant
that your name was NOrval, and that
your father was IN the sheep business in
the Grampian hills"
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Four weeks more-count 'em, four-and
that pestiferous son Of iniquity. Speaker
Cannon, will be on the Congressional job
again. waiting for all those grand, gloomy,
and peculiar things to happen to him.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
GenernsItv-

From tho Boston Transcript
Club waiter (fshing)-I dreamed last
night. sir. that YOU gave me a $ bill.
Sungy member-Indeed. James! That's
little high for tip; but-er-you may
keep IL,
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Some or the sugar trust plunderers
make a common sneak thief look highly
respectable in comparison.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
HIS Educntion CompIete.

whoever educated that fellow ought
to use him as a testimonial He'd make a
fine one"
why soY'
He knows II all"
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

"The time IS near az hand when the
majority OF mankind will wear wings "
says a New Jersey scientist. What
with football, automobile scorching, and
so on. We hardly doubt Il.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

What the average man thinks ne needs
in this country is an eIectricaIy-stimu-
lated income and a hookworm-infected
outCo-
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

In the matter OF successfully disposing
OF snakes, Secretary Ballinger IS stH a
few laps behind st. Patrick. il would
seem.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
COMMISSIONER WEST.
Comment Upon HIS Return TO News
paper Life.

From the Danville Register.
The announcement comes from Wash
ington that Henry L. West. one OF the
three Commissioners Of the District Of
Columbia for several years. has relin-
quished that honorable and lucrative post
TO return to his old love in the world OF
Journalism. He has done this to accept
the business direction Of The Washing
ton Herald, being associated with his old
friend and eo-laborer, Scott c. Bone, pro-
prietor Of that brilliant newspaper. Mr..
West for years engaged In newspaper
work in Washington and during the
greater part of that time he was con-
nected with the Washington Post. in the
days when the work Of Bone. West.
Merrick Bergman. and others made 1t
the greatest newspaper In the East. Mr.
West was regarded as one OF the most
brilliant political reporters that have
served in Washington in years. and we
suspect that he Will contribute to The
Herald in future some Of his nIumina ting
reviews Of political conditions-in Con
gress. in the country. and IN Virginia
No man in Washington newspaperdom
knew Virginia politics and public men so
well as Mr.. West His experience as
District Commissioner had served 10 ex-
tend his acquaintance and to strengthen
his grasp Of political conditions in Wash
ington and in the country.
The Herald OF to-day IS 20 Washington
what the Post was ten years ago. Mer-
rick brilliant paragrapher. is no more:
Bergman has transferred his splendid
cartoon contributions to another paper.
but Messrs- Bone and West will give 20
The Herald a strength It has not here
totore possessed.
In resuming newspaper work. Mr.. West
but exhibited that well-known attach
ment which the work has FOR all who
really love It.
/ From the Fourth Estats
Henry Litchneld West has resigned as
Commissioner OF the District OF CoIum-
bia and returns 70 the newspaper bust
ness as part owner OF The Washington
Herald, in which capacity he VII De as
sociated with Scott c. Bone. Mr.. West
before becoming active in politics. was
political writer for the Washington Post
lie IS a native OF Staten Island. y. y.
and an ex-presideHt OF the Gndlron Club
Mr. West was appointed Commissioner
In 1902.
From :hs Phfadelrhia PrssA
one good newspaper man does not be-
lieve in wasting his time and talents ir
public Office. Commissioner West. Of the
District OF Columbia, has resigned hi.
high Federal position TO re-enter III,
| newspaper field.
I Fr0m tho Boston Herald
/ Back 70 journalism goes District Com
! missioner West, OF Washington. Never
too late 20 correct a misstep.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Maude Adams IS thirty-seven years OF
age. One reason why she admits It so
cheerfully is because nobody seems dis
posed 10 believe IT,
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

When a mob starts out on a lynch
ing tour. it doesn't care whom it lynches.
if the original victim can't be found, the
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Having been awarded 100000 all
mony, Mrs Astor is in position to view
with approximate indifference the ad-
vance in the price Of champagne.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Royal Newspaper Readers.

Every ruler OF Europe watches the
newspapers. The German Emperor has
six secretaries TO prepare extracts for
him. two OF them being French. They
cut out everything OF interest TO him and
paste the scraps on sheets Of foolscap.
They must present disagreeable as well
as pleasant clippings. The Gar has sim
liar clippings prepared. but there Is also
printed daily a special newspaper for his
perusal This Is entitled "The Cars
Journal and IS edited by the head OF
the Russian police. Only one copy Of
each issue IS printed. The Gar notes
comments and orders in the margin and
sends IL % police headquarters Its fea-
lures include reports Of the Russian
secret police. sent by them from every
part Of the world; copies Of confessions
made by prisoners. copies OF the reports
and balance sheets Of popular organiZa-
tions, and elaborate details OF the utter
ances and movements Of suspected per-
sons. Frequently Il has accounts OF the
progress Of plots 20 murder the Car.
Their consplracies are allowed 20 pro-
ceed up 20 the last point. so that as
large a number OF criminals as possible
may be caught. and that the proofs Of
their crime may be convincing. King
, Edward has clippings prepared, but he
also reads some newspapers for himself.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Smart women no longer wear rats. -
notes the Louisville Courier-Journal
Some people doubt that real smart wom-
en- ever did wear them
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
A shrine of whitman.

Now and then. some admirer from q
distance, or even from dlmIy appreclatve
Philadelphia, would make the journey by
ferry across the Delaware 20 Camden
and pay respects TO Walt Whitman. The
aged poet always received these callers
with genial manner and would offer tea
for refreshment. Now the owner OF the
birthplace OF Walt Whitman. AZ West
Hills, Long Island. has decided 20 sell the
property at auction 20 the highest bid
der. He gives as a reason that he is
tired OF answering questions about the
birthplace OF the good. gray poet and
entertaining admiring pilgrims who Jour
ney there and take up his time with
what he considers fool questions. These
enthusiasts not only poster him with in
qulries while he Is attempting 20 care for
the farm. but tramp over the fields and
ruin his Cabbages and cUcumbers and
other vegetables that he cultivates for
the markets. Weary and dsgusted the
unfortunate owner Of the spot OF inter-
est has decided to quit and purchase
land IN some locality that has no his
torlc associations.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Jesse James probably would have
scorned some OF the methods OF the sugar
trust.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16
Sometimes the Cn,e.

From TIE Kansas City Times.
Editors pay cash for what they buy and
give credit for what they clip.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

Half past November. and all is we'll.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

From he Philadslphia Pr.sz

From he Phradelphia Press
one good newspaper man does not be-
lieve IN wasting his time and talents ir
public Office. Commissioner West. OF the
District OF Columbia, has resigned hi.
high Federal position TO re-enter TIT
newspaper field.
The Washington herald., 1909-11-16

HUN 10 Dlollu utTlll.
Back 20 Journalism goes District Com
missioner West, Of Washington. Never
TOO late 20 correct a misstep.
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
THE WORST IS
YET TO COME.
Congresmen Trembling Less President Taft
is Planning to Treat Them to Some
Roosevelt TObaSCO

WASHINGTON, Dec S.--The con.
servatiyes In congress- are trembling
today lest that voiuminous sigh OF
relief that nearly shook the dome of
the capitol yesterday should prove
premature. The sigh was prompted
by the conviction that the presidential
message marked the beginning of an
era free from Rooseveltian strenuous.
ity, But with the reflection that the
two great questions upon which Taft
dwelt particularly in his speeches
through the west, conservation and
amendment of the Interstate com.
merce law were omitted from the mes.
sage. The idea spreads today that
perhaps the worst is yet to come, II
has been learned that these two sub
jects were pruned from the Taft an
nual message upon the advice of the
cabinet for consideration In special
messages. Yet the Taft cabinet got
together at the White house and for
three hours pondered over these ques
tlons. The result of the conference
of the cabinet would not be divulged
but II Is generally believed that spo-
cial messages on conservation and In.
terstate commerce Will contain some
Roosevelt tobasco. They do not come
until January.
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
Died From Ef-
fects Of Injuries

Our friend and old-time citizen.
Andy Erler, is again bemoaning fate
that has relieved him of another
bother. George Erler having died yes
terday evening from the effects of in
juries received in the Hesperus coal
mine yesterday about noon. Mr.. Err
Ter was working in the mine when
"bony coal" or rock above the coal
vein weighing probably 600 pounds
fell upon his head and body, severely
bruising the head and evidently injur-
ing him Internally. He was removed
to his room and DR.. Lackey telephoned
for. The doctor departed as soon as
possible on horse back arriving about
4 O'Clock He did what he could for
the suffering man and arranged for
permit bringing him to Durango on the
freight train. intending 70 convey him
to Mercy hospital. En- route to Du-
range on the train George died, being
about Z O'Clock.
No blame whatever is attached to
the management for the accident, the
mine being provided with every safe.
guard and William Mason is one OF
the most careful and efficient superin.
tendents in the country. and always
glad for the most searching investiga.
lion. We understand Andy Erler
makes the statement. stating last ev
ening there was no fault to find with
the mine condition or management
the accident being one OF the unfortu
nate kind that every now and then oc
ours.
Coroner Goodman said 1t would moi
be determined until this evening II
an inquest would be held. The mine
management is perfectly agreeable tc
an inquest in order that everything IL
connection with the accident may bs
brought out. The local management
wired the state mine inspector las
evening and this official will proba
bly, arrive in day or two and lool
into the matter and report.
! The funeral will take place from ST
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09

An agent for wholesale liquor
house going into dry territory and
soliciting orders from individuals to
be delivered in the original package
Ia subject to the same ordinances that
control the sale of liquor In that ter.
rltory by residents OF the territory
is the gist of an opinion delivered by
the supreme court Monday NJ Burn
stein. representing wholesale liquor
house of Denver, solicited trade from
individuals. was arrested and fined
The saloon men carried the case to
the supreme court on the grounds that
the town Ind no right to prohibit
Denver house from selling through
agents. The court holds that the town
has that right and that the agent is
subject to the same penalty for the
violation of the ordinance as resi-
dent of the town would be subject to
The opinion will stope the sale OF
whisky through agents of original
packages through agents
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
Railroad Man In.
jured at Chama

About o'clock this morning spe.
cial arrived from Chama with James
Gibbs who was seriously injured at
that place last evening. 1t is under
stood that the accident occurred when
Mr.. Gibbs, who Is engine hostler al
Chama, was loading coal on an engine
slipped and was caught between the
tender and the engine. His
leg was crushed and he re.
ceiyed number Of bruises
about the body. DR.. Garthwaite
the company physician at Chamai
accompanied Mr.. Gibbs to Du-
range. DR.. Turrell met them at the
depot with the ambulance and the In.
jured man was taken to Mercy hospi.
tai. 1t was found necessary to am
putate the limb Just below the knee
This was done shortly before noon
This afternoon he is resting as well az
could be expected. 1t is not antici
pated that he suffers any internal in
juries.
Mr. Gibbs is married man with
children. 1t was impossible for Mrs
Gibbs to come with her husband AZ
she could not leave her little ones.
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
City Council

City council met last night in reg
ular session. Mayor Goodman presid-
ing All aldermen present.
The minutes of Nov. 2. Nov. ., Nov.
16 and Nov 20 were read and approx.
ed.
City Health Officer Hurd was pres
ent. The council had instructed the
doctor tc send samples of city water
to the state chemist for analysis to
determine whether or not the supply
is sanitary Three different samples
were analysed, one from the upper
reservoir, one from the second reser-
voir and the third tap water. DIR.
Hurd stated that according TO the state
chemists analysis, the water with
which the city is supplied is absolute.
ly sanitary The following is the anal
ysis in full:
Denver. Colo, Nov. IA, 1909.
Report on examination of mineral
analysis OF water No g. Amounts
reckoned IN grains per u S. gallon
Sodium sulphide, 0.3S1; sodium chic
rid, O.525; sodium carbonate, 1,66S
ferrous carbonade, 3,S27; calcium car.
bonade, 0.G62; also traces of organic
matter, silica. calcium sulphate and
magnesium sulpate; no lithia.
(Signed) EDWARD o. HILL.
Alderman Dudley moved that this
report be placed on file and the bill
for the same be allowed. Carried.
The petition of Lawrence Miller fol-
transfer license was read and granted
The reports of the different officers
for the month of November were read
on hand of $l6.s45.07 Two eases OF
scarlet fever were reported by the
health officer. The police magistrate
reported twenty arrests during the
month or these four were dismissed
Seventy dollars were collected in fines
The poundmaster reported having
placed twenty head of stock in the
pound Alderman Turner moved thai
these reports be placed on file. Car
ried
A communication from w, b. Doug
las, special examiner of surveys fol
the government was read. Mr.. Doug
las stated he had been recalled tt
Washington. and would see that tn,
matter OF having the old reservoir
grant amended was attended TO.
Water Superintendent Schalles stat
ed that he had received another com
munication OF Mrs. A. A. Rust cor
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
PEOPLE ARE KEIi>
IN IGNORANCE
So Strict is Censorship Maintained by zelaya
that Residents Of Western Part Do Not
Know What is Going On

PANAMA, Dec. S.-Passengers ar
irving here from Nicaragua state that
the people in that republic are kept
in ignorance of what is happening in
the country. So strict is the censor
ship maintained by President Zelaya
that residents of the western part oil
Nicaragua have not learned of the
breaking Off of diplomatic relations
between the United States and Mica
ragua
The president of Honduras, reported
10 be an ally of Zelaya. has wired the
Honduran minister to Salvador inquir.
ing about events in Nicaragua after
having waited ten days for reply to
the numerous messages sent by him
10 Managua
General Toledo Is besieged at Grey
town, which is surrounded on land
and sea ny insurgents. General Vas
quez, commander OF the government
forces at the last battle near Rama
was court martialled because of the
defeat suffered by the government
troops. This battle was desperate
one. The government column which
entered the fight with $50 soldiers left
all but four of them dead on the field
NEW ORLEANS. Dee S.--A special
from the City of Mexico says:
Authoritative information has been
obtained here that Mexico will exert
her good offices looking toward an
amicable settlement in the Central
American imbroglio. Charles e. Ma
goon, formerly governor of Cuba will
be appointed a special envoy by the
United SttaaSses -t,9- meet Senor Enrique
Creel now on his way TO Washington
from the City of Mexico, and Magoon
viii take up the adjustment of the
Nicaraguan question. The United
States will see to it that Nicaragua
carries out the rules and regulations
that may he decided upon by the
special ENJOYS"
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
DUEL TO DEATH
WITH REvoLvERs

WARREN, Pa, Dec S.--The story
OF a duel TO death with revolvers be
ed room during the night. the killing
OF the husband by the wife and hei
writing to Il relative telling of the
deed. were unfolded by Mrs. Anna An
derson. aged sc. on trial on the charge
oil niuruer. MS. s.i.--E-----i.- -------.-i---
defense She says her husband mis-
treated and abused her. She was com
PEELED to kill him or he would her
Semi-weekly herald., 1909-12-09
Beat the Off.
GERS to il

COLUMBUS, Ohio, Dec. S.-Frank
Grimes. convicted of the murder OF
Blanche Mcknight, sentenced to die
In the electric chair. March 25. to ex-
plate that crime, committed suicide
in his cell In the county Jail this morn.
ing. by hanging himself with sheet.
Grimes had been sentenced by Judge
Bigger Tuesday and was In jail await.
ing removal to the penitentiary annex.