davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Why Not?

Grandpa likes to kiss wee Sallie.
She says no;
Says his whiskers. thick and bushy,
Prick her so.
Grandpa's head is soft and shiny
On the top,
Where the hair began to thin and
Would not stop.
Grandpa kisses. Sallie questions,
So tbs said,
Grandpa, why not put your whiskers
On your head?"
Chicago Record Herald.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

YOUNG MEN WANTED. who desire to
L earn better salaries and do more con-
genial work. If able to read and write and
ambitious to succeed. we can qualify you for
a position as mechanical, steam, civil or
mining engineer, architect, etc. etc. Write
kann. Rep. l. c. s. New Ulm. MINI.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
His Oppo tunity.

Son-Yaas, guv'nor, at college |
could lift more than any other man il
my class.
Father-Waal, jest We take off yer
coat an try yer hand at liftin' the
mortgage we put on the farm tew send
We tew colledge.-Chicago News.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Boarding House Plume.

You dump into the tub some salt
That's finely ground.
And then into the tub you vault
And splash around
It's like an ocean bath, one finds,
Although it lacks the melon rinds.
The water isn't quite so rough
As ocean waves,
Yet fills the picture we'll enough
And money saves,
And other boarders at the door
Will initiate the surf's loud roar.
Kansas City Journal.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Texas Gives Up Mars For Melons.

We don't care much to signal Mars.
But we've about a million cars
OF melons. we give you a tip,
All ready now to pick and ship:
Cucumbers till you just can't rest.
And onionS-say, we've got the best
And biggest ever raised, l guess!
just ask Bermuda. She'll confess.
We've got no time to signal Mars.
We're loading truck on to our cars.
Houston Post.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Don't Cough, But Live Long.

II every cough were cured before it got
strong holl. human life would be length
ened by many years. II every cough sufferer
knew that kemp's Balsam would stop the
cough in few minutes, he would be glad to
escape the serious consequences. If any
medicine will cure a cough, Kemp's Balsam
will do it. At druggists and dealers, Is cts.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Goino Some.

MY uncle used to smoke his pipe
and blow smoke rings that would float
across the room and ring the door
knob
'My uncle" said the other liar
dreamily, used to blow some that
would ring the doorbell Puck.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Financial Aviation.

80 you played those tips on the
MARKET"
Yes. | took a fier in Wall street,
but something went wrong with my
steering gear."-New Orleans Times
Democrat
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Careless Charles.

Charley, dear" said young Mrs.
Torkins. what is piker?"
"a piker is man who starts with a
shoestring and tries to run it up into
a bank roll"
How careless of you. Every time
you used to go to the races you in
sisted on wearing button shoesr'-
Washington Star.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
A d WRITER'S WANTED

hD WRITER'S WANTED. There are
"A many positions open for ad writer's
and advertising managers. Salaries run as
high as S16,000a year. We can teach you
Advertising in your spare time and at low
cost. Ability 10 read and write and ambi
tion to succeed are all you need. Write to-
day for Two Hundred Million Dollar adver-
tisingBook let" which gives full particulars
Paul Kann, Rep. l. c. S. New Ulm, Mimi
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
The WAYS of Fate.

Fate hit me very hard one day.
l cried: What is my fault?
What have l done? What causes, pray,
This unprovoked ASSAULT"
She paused, then said: "Darned if know!
| really can't explain,
And just before sac turned to so
She Whacked me once again
La Touche Hancock in New York
Times
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

Waiter Crying to pull cork out of
bottle)-Durn it! III get the blessed
thing out if have to shove it I'M
Lippincott's Magazine.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
The Consistent Cynic.

FAIRY stories usually end and they
lived happily ever after"
Yes" answered Mr. Sirius Barker;
that's one of the reasons why l don't
believe in fairies. "-Washington Star.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
An Admonition.

0 Mars, when we exchange remarks some
day,
AS wise men say that we are sure to do,
Pray heed this early warning. Do not
say:
"Hello, there! Is it hot enough for
your"
Houston Post.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

Full many resorts may promise fun
For cen vacation short.
But not to the hopelessly busted one
Who's down to his last resort.
Kansas City Times
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Going Down.

We all know just what happens
To man in a canoe
With sweet girl whose lips are pursed
And coax a kiss or two.
But what will happen to the duck,
The ardent wooing swain,
Who makes jump to kiss girl
Up in an aeroplane?
Mortimer Lewis in Houston Post
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
EloGuence.

Knicker-Do people hang on his
words?
Bocker-As though they were car
straps.-New York Sun
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Come on, BOYS.

The airships have been tried when the
weather was good,
When Nature was in her best form,
But what we would like is a different
mood
And see them tried out in a storm
Washington Star.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
The Food Question.

The mosquito bored through the
paint and powder on a girls face and
then became violently sick.
Curse these adulterated foods, any
how. said he.-Philadelphia Ledger.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

Enga gements terminate in town,
In theater, in shop and store,
To be renewed two months or so
Down by the e'er engaging shore.
Boston Globe
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Figuring the Expense.

fisherman went on a glad holiday,
And great was the pleasure he found.
Though the fish that he caught, so the
knowing ones say,
Cost him twenty eight dollars a pound.
Washington Star.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
En- Repos.

my wife never pays any attention
to what say"
'NIine does at times"
'Indeedw
Eyes, when l talk in my Sleep
Lippincott's Magazine.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
AS a Last Resort.

Uncle-Johnny, wouldn't you like to
be an angel?
Johnny-Not as long as there's
show for me to become a baseball
pitcher or circus clown.-Chicago
News.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
The Philosophers Stone.

The summers wondrous alchemy
Now sets US in a whirl
The summer girl an heiress grows,
The ribbon clerk an earl.
New York Sun.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
A Poetical TIP.

Should it be your one ambition to write a
humorous verse pick out an ancient
subject and express in language
terse. The editor may reject
it if the meters out of
joint, but if you
fashion il like
this he'll sure
ly see the
point
-Iipnincott,S Magazine
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

what is the latest con
ceit in ladies' summer hats?
Judkins-My wife.-Town Topics.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
-Lippincott's Magazine.
Natural Deduction.

Blox-Dawkins is one of those chaps
who pay as they go, isn't he?
KNOX, guess So At least he never
goes far-San Francisco Examiner.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14

The hammock is just beginning to
get interesting to those who whisper
sweet little nothings till the edge of
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Star.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Or Even "the Dickens

"Does lightning scare you"
"Scares me to beat thunder" kan
sas City Times.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Mary's Lamb.

Mary had a little lamb,
So we have oft been told.
Twas butchered ten years later
And as spring lamb was sold.
st. Louis Republic.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
Tho Usual Seouen

Jag, joy ride. jail.-Cleveland Plain
Dealer
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-07-14
THE GAZETTE OFFICE
The Best Pair To Draw To
AbSoi0m 27O14

Absolom is a jet black, foaled
May "a, 1900, weight in show
ring condition 2l20 lbs, and is
undoubtedly the most noted
Percheron stallion offered for
public service in the entire
northwest. first prize winner
Worlds Fair, St.Louis, 1904. and
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10

will come In on the hit and run stunt. All this came about through coincii dence. He started from home on a single, when 8 feminine arrirer i1 inc grand stand imbned Dim with .he ambition to make 1t a double, and this after climax shows that he must be credited w'ta triple. For Tom has joined the Papa league and all the bah (bawD he plays hereafter Will he with Tommy Junior as an under ft;aly
 Arizona in Fine shape.
 w. D. Berry. the popular represen- tatiye of Haas-Baruch & Co, Of Los Angeles, is in the city looking after the interests of his firm. Berry has just completed a trip of three weeks through Arizona, and is enthusiastic over the mining possibilities of tha, territory. He is espec ally sanguine over the prospects of the Ray Consoli- dated, and says it is going to take a high rank.
 Personals.
 C. F. Chester, a Morenci citizen, is registered at the Alexandria.
 Leo Nj. Purw'n, of Los Angeles, Is a guest of the Hotel Sonora.
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10

ested capitalists will soon be on the ground.
 The Ray Consolidated Copper ecm. pany, which has without doubt one of the largest low grade copper de posits in the territory, is backed by some of the foremost mining ana financial men of the country, such men as D. c. Jaekall. s. OIdrich, Mir Dunham, s. Mudd. Philip Wiseman several prominent English capitalists and others
 Since the change in management of the Rap Copper company some eight months ago. the actual mining was stopped Altogether and development work on an extensive scale was start ed and will be continued for some time to come. Eleven churn drills have been installed on the property and holes of various depths to 50O feet and from 100 to 150 feet apart are being drilled. Gre has been en- countered. with but few exceptions, in every hole, and the management or tke property is immensely pleased with the conditions. Several of the old shafts made Dy the old manage ment are now being worked for ore to be used al the mill Many thou sands of tons of ore have been block ed out and are being shipped to the mill as rapidly as possible. The present mill is being worked to its full capacity night and day. The mill is too small and plans and specifica tions for large mill of from 2000 to 5000 tonnage daily will soon be drawn and then big things can be lcIHed for from this locality; 1909 saould De year of plenty and prosperity for all
 . Travelling right allng with the Ray Consolidated Copper company is the Eagle Mountain Copper company a new company Col. r. T. McGraCn the general manager. has taken up some very extensivt' copper property across the GIIa riger from the Ray Copper company. and adioinig the rich Sultana Arizona Copper com pany, and is doing some extensive de. veloping work. This property mas been developed in a small WAY for the last twelve years and some very rich ore was encountered. but since Col McGTath took hold the development work has been pushed and very good
 sulphide ores have been struck at NaIlDus utplHS. JUL ACIialu Has Htu considerable mining experience, hay ing been connected with a number O. large mining properties, and he pro nounces this property as a good one
 and one that should. develop we'll The colonel expects to go east soon in the interest of the Eagle Mountain Copper company and promises on his return to open the eyes of the people of Arizona.
 Geo. Sarrick has been working or
 his group of claims near Wooliy switch the past few months and has encountered some very good ore. Mir Sarrick is a very practical miner and knows a good mining proposition when he sees it. He has had pos session of this group of claims for a number of years and has developed them in a very practical manner
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10

them playing for nearly a half an - hour. The officers were concealed in another room and could see every move made by the negroes and hear every word that was spoken.
 'Ple just raise that two fifty" You caint blum me, old kid. Ple just take that air bet" and many simi. lar phrases not used by card players when they are playing for drinks. as sured the policemen that the men were violating the gambling law.
 They were taken to the city jail. and later released on twenty-five dol lars bond each. The place has been suspected for some time as a place where money changed hands over the cards, but the police have been
 unable to secure evidence which would warrant arresting any of the frequenters of the club for violations of the gambling law Last nights
 raid. however, was successful in catching four of the gamblers In the act. The case will be called at g o'clock in police court this morning
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10
WANT WOOL GROWERS
 IN ALBUQUERQUE

ALBUQUERQUE. N. M Jan. s. George Arnot. Solomon Luna. w. E. Mauger and other men prominently identified with the wool business in New Mexico, are taking an active in terest in a plan proposed yesterday to urge the National Wool Growers as soelation to hold its next annual con vention in Albuquerque
 The national association will meet January 13 to Is in Pocatello, Idaho, in it's 5th annual session and, owing to the tariff agitation and the press ing questions affecting the public do main. a large attendance is expected. An effort will be Iaade to send a strong delegation from Albuquerque to this convention and to extend an invitation to the wool growers to hold the 6th annual convention here. Al buqueTque's new convention hall, the vast extent of the wool industry In New Mexico and the rapidly growing attention being given the industry Tn the southwest by the wool trade Of the nation are influences which are expected to work faYorably. In addi- tion, not one of the 45 sessions Of lns association has ever been held in the southwest nor has the southwest ever had a representative in the eficiai makeup of the organization.
 
 Review Want Ads bring results
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10
OUTLOOK GOOD FUR THE KELVIN
 NE|CHb0RH00O
Ray Consolidated, Eagle Moun- tain, and Other Mines Will Increase Production During Coming Year.

KELVIN, Jan. S.-The year of 1909 from all present indications, promises to be a very eventful one for the KeI. yin mining district The price of cop per has gradually risen to a reason. able figure and work has been re stunned on a small scale, but gradually increasing daily. During the past year there was no extensive mining operations here. but every prospectoi and individual claim owner was busy developing his property The mineral wealth is here and the people of thts locality feel confident of the ultLmat prosperity of Kelvin.
 There were several important saleg during the past year which speak well for the future. The Ray Corsol dated Copper company underwent some important changes fn it's man agement, which to date have benefited the mining district immensely. J. L Shoemaker sold his extensive holdings to a company of Milwaukee capital ists, headed by Col P T. McGrath an active mining man. There were some important changes in the man agement of the Sultana-Arizona Cop per company The Troy Manhattan company took new life toward the lat. ter part of the year; the Renfro prop erty is daily showing up better, and all the surrounding properties have a splendid outlook. Queries are com ing in every day from people all over the country asking about the copTer prospects here, and the office of T. s. Tsook is Kept busy responding to them. The Dagger Well claims stili keep showing up rich and from re ports coming a large crowd of inter
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10

showing up the ore in good shape In some places he encountered copper ore which assayed 45 to 50 per cent, but this grade runs in punches, ana taking the ore on his claims on an average 1t will assay good. MT. Sar- rick is anxious to dispose of his prop erty and is willing to sell cheap. Mrs. L. Emmet vas fin town several days last week looking after her min ing claims and seeing that the annual assessment work was being done IL
 Just how inviting Globe looks to outside capital is made plain by the fact that there are now fin the city the representatives of two large cleo tric concerns, looking over the ground with view to applying for franchises
 for street railway Epes, either trolley lines or gasoline operated motors, says the Globe SilvesBelt.
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10
ALLEGED VIOLATION
 OF GAMBLING LAW

The first arrests made in Albuquer. que for violation of the gambling law since it went into effect year ago, were made last night when Night Marshal Harry Cooper and Police man VIII Marquette raided a negro club at PA North Third street ana arrested the proprietor of the place, George Harris, and three other ne groes, J. B. Smith, Pearl Bridge ana I NJ. Burton, all of N hom were caught in Che act of gambling, says the Jour nal.
 Although the men were taken com pletely by surprise they were vehe- ment in declaring that they were not gambsng tCr money, but were play ing for the drlnks. The game they we're playing was poker
 Before placing the men under ar rest the two policemen had watched
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10
S|x-SHOOTER ARTIST ASKED
 ID SK|DDOO
CananeanS Never Extend Well come To His Kind-Recep- ton At Mesa Unqualified SucceSs-New Fire House.

LA CANANEA. Jan 9.-The recep- tien given at the Mesa branch of the CanSnea stores yesterday afternoon in honor cf the ladies of Cananea. was a complete success in every way. While the number thst responded 10 the inv tations was considerably larger than had been expected those who had the affair i1 cNarge handled the big crowd so ski'lfully th2t there was not a single hitch in the admirably ar ranged program.
 A splend Mex can orchestra ren- dered almost continuous music from the opening hour at two until the clcs- ing tme at six. Lunch was served and a large punch bowl was kept well ill- ed through the entire cme. Harry Cook. the ensrg gatic manager, Was ably assisted by his courteous clerks. and by Miss Kate Adlms and Arthur Clouthier Of the main store.
 This is new vea-urs in Cananea, and it's successful ouss1me Is a credit to the progressive management Of the mercantile department
 Fire Boys Are A. No. i. one of the least noticed. but never theless, most valuable adiuncts to the | big coneentrstor Of the Cananea Con- ] solidated is the well fitted tiremen's dorm tory. which was completed dp- ' ing the quiet times of a year ago 1t [ is located directly across the narrow
 guage railroad from concentrator No. | 1, and is within easy reach of the e1 ! tire plant and adjacent dwelling <, houses It has six sleeping rooms, 3 a Ia eral room is fxed up as a louTging place and reading room. it always 6as an assortment of the best newspapers and periodicals on file. and is well patroniZad.. The task of procuring vol unteer firemen in that department is a very easy one, aud their efficiency is not surpassed by any similar organiza- l ton in the camp.
 Presence Not Desired 1 A we'll known American cowpuncA- I er who has been in and around here 7 for several years. has been giN .ia notice by the local authorities that nis i presence f1 the city lim'tr is rot ne- | sir, q, and, that iC Le wants to retain his liberty, he had better stick close ] to the ranch hereafter A few nights ago he galloped through the streets i for short while. emptying his six 1 shooter at the moon and endanger' ng | the lives of several people. This feat ! has not been attempted in Cananea very often, and the disturber never ! gets sn opportunity to repeat his e& | pertinent
 Tom Makes a Triple.
 Tom Whaling, the sensational center ] fielder has signed mn in fine oldest and most responsible league in Inc ! world. For q time he will be on the
 bench for great deal, but lster on
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10
Presence Not Desired.
Tnm Makas a IrinIe-

Tom Whaling, the sensational center fielder has signed up in the oldest and most responsible league in the world. For a time he will be on the bench for great deal, but later on
Bisbee daily review., 1909-01-10

Review Want Ads bring results
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1909-10-02

is the only left-hander on either staff.
Leifield would have been a 10 shot
over the old Tigers. But Jones and
Delahanty in the places of Rossman
and Schaefer put distinctlvely diff
ferent complexion on DetrOits swat
order
AS already remarked. it is tough to
separate the two teams. Besides, that
rs betting that is going on in New
York and Pittsburg is ridiculous. At
that price the Tigers look good
For it is even money, and nothing
else.
The games should abound in free
hitting, and surely Detroit can pun
mel the pill as harshly as Pittsburg
or any other team in the universe.
Brown and Overall had to to com
pete in shut games in order to
make the going soft for the Cubs.
Clarke doesn't own two pitchers like
that starry Chicago pair.
Even Money, Take Your Choice.
Figuring everything that may come
to pass, Detroit's chances look just as
good as Pittsburg's. Jennings machine
has never been as bad as the Cubs
made it look two OctOberS running.
Right now Detroit is stronger than
ever before.
Summers and Willett have de-
veloped nicely. Jennings catching staff
this season is the best on che has
ever employed. Jones and Delahanty
strengthened the Tigers on the of
fense. for no longer are they mark
The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1909-10-02

Clarke, Lynch, in fact. all seven of
PlttSburg's regulars are great men on
the bags. Jennings has three whirI-
winds in his outfield. Bush and Mo-
Rarity are also happy mixers Della
hanty is d fair base runner Tom
Jones doesn't boast of much speed,
but the gallant squire always shows
the best of Judgment and works in his
share of the pliers each season. He's
a good man when he gets on.
The two pitching stats are as much
alike as two sardines in a box Willis
and Camnitz are Clarke's best twirl
ers Donovan and Mullin naturally
are Jeninsng big pair. Summers is
another O. X. Detroiter. Willett, too,
is a serviceable man.
Then Clarke has Adams. a rare good
juvenile but a youngster who will
hardly be worked in the big series;
Maddox. an in-and-outer on this years
form: Leifield. a fairly reliable work.
man; venerable PHILIPPE and Lever,
as well as big bevy of youngsters.
However. Donovan. if right, Muilin,
Summers and Willet for Detroit, and
Willis, Camnitz, Leifeld and Maddox
or Philippe for Pittsburg, are the
only boXmen the fans will probably
see in action
LeifieId the Only Southpaw.
Leifeld-of St Louis, if you please