Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1909-11-09

some acquaintance with me; but | am
unable to recall you. We may have
met somewhere, sometime, but really
don't know you. The title to which
you pretend is unfamiliar to me; but
will frankly disclose to you that |,
[ sir, am .he governor of North Caro-
lima"
1.-THE what?" bleated the duke, his
eyes bullying.
II repeat, that am the governor of
North Carolina, and as a state of war
now exists in my unhappy kingdom, L,
ferred upon the three coordinate
branches of government under the
| American system, namely, or If you
prefer it, will say, to wit: the legis-
latfve, the executive and the judicial.
1t is thus not only my privilege but my
painful duty to pass upon your case in
all its sad aspects. AS have already
suspended the writ of habeas corpus
and set aside the right to trial by jury
we will consider that sit here as the
supreme court"
''For Gods sake, Ardy-" howled the
duke.
THAT remark l will not construe as
profanity, but don't let it occur again
The first charge against you is that
of Insulting a woman on the Sunset
Trail in the estate called Ardsley,
owned by a person known in law as
| Thomas Ardmore. There are three
witnesses to the fact that you tried to
! stop a woman in the road, and that
streak on your face is even more con-
elusive. Are you guilty OF not guilty."
you are mad! You are crazy!"
shouted the duke; but his face was
| very white now, and the mark of the
| crop famed scarlet.
"You are guilty, beyond any question
But the further charged against you
that you pretend to be-what did he
say his name was, oke?'--that you
| pretend to be the Duke of Bally-
Wrinkle must now be considered That
is quite right, is it; you say you are
the Duke?"
Eyes; you fool" howled the duke.
I'll have the. law on you for this!
| I'll appeal to the British ambassador"
Il advise you not to appeal to any
body said Ardmore, "and the British
ambassador is without jurisdiction in
North Carolina. You have yourself as
Wrinkle. Why Ballywinllle? Why not
Argyll; why not Westminster? Why
not if duke you must be, the noble
Duke of York;"
The Duke of Ballywinkle sat staring,
stupeied. The whodething was one
of his silly brother-in-law's stupid
jokes; there was no question of that;
and Tommy Ardmore was always a
bore; but in spite of the comfort he
derived from these reflections the
duke was not little uneasy: for he
had never seen mis- brother-in-law in
just this mood, and he did not like il.
Ardmore was carrying the joke too
far; and there was an assurance in
Ardmore's tone, and light in Ard
more's eyes that were ominous. Cooke
had meanwhile lighted his Lipe and
was calmly smoking until his chief
should have his fling.
Ardmore now drew from his pocket
Johnston's American Politics with an
air of greatest seriousness.
Cooke he said, half to himself as
he turned the pages, '.do you remem-
Der just what the constitution says
about dukes? Oh, yes; here we are!
to what it says here in Section TX of
the Constitution of the United States,
which reads exactly as follows in this
book: No title of nobility shall be
granted by the United States: And no
person holding any office of profit or
trust under them, shall, without the
consent Of the congress. accept of any
present, emolument, office, or title, of
any kind whatever, from any king,
prince, or foreign state And it says
in section X that No state shall grant
any title of nobility Now, Mr.. Bally-
Wrinkle, it is perfectly clear that this
government can't recognize anything
that it can't create, for That would be
foolish. AS l. the governor of North
Carolina, can't make a duke, l can't
see one. You are therefore wholly
illegal; it's against the most sacred
law of the land for you 10 be here at
all; and, painful though it is to me, it
is nevertheless my duty to order you
to leave the United States at once;
never to return. In fact, il you ever
appear in the United States again,
hereby order that you be hanged by
the neck until you be dead. One OF
Mr.. Cookies men will accompany you
to New York tomorrow AMI see to it
that you take passage on a steamer
bound for a British port. The crime
of having insulted woman will still
hang over you until you are VOL east
of Sandy Hook, and I advise YOU not
to risk being tried on that charge in
North Carolina, as my people are very
impulsive and emotional AID lynchings
are not infreouent in our midst. You
shall spend tonight in my official ca
boose some distance from here, and
your personal effects will be brought
from Ardsley, where, you have said,
you are guest of Mr.. Thomas Ard
more, who is officially unknown to me.
The supreme court will now adjourn.
Cooke pulled the limp, bewildered
duke to his feet, and dragged him from
the bungalow.
AS they stepped out on the veranda
Collins rode UP in alarm.
81 followed this road to cross-road
where it becomes a bridle-path and
runs off into the forest. There l lost
all trace of the lady, but here is her
riding-crop."
HTonla tal5a vo11r nrisoner to the