Okolona messenger. (Okolona, Miss.) 1900-current, 1909-02-24
ONE on UNCLE
Tx RERV
HIs Generosity Cost tilm a Keat Penny

left ear 10 pc sure Sne uluii hefr IA h
40, sir, by gum. becaG1e there's
nothing in lottery to prevent you"
tearing up your ticket when you lose
See what l mean, son? You can
beat it, Woman, woman, loYely WON
an Only the forethcught Of wise and
beneicent Providence. which prevent
ed her from ever learning to throw
straight, makes life worth living. nv
50. by gracious.
"Get the idea? They've got YOU
nun,ber from the start. They look al.
ferent, think different, act different
and are different from men. We'll
then, how you going to beat 1t? Eh?
Certainly you cant.
They've got you going and coming
because,they know what you held and
what you are going to draw. They
know the man who makes the card.
They kid you along until you get to
feeling good and then-and then
"Son, I've been up against this game
for years, but this is the ultimate, eter'
aal limit. See thise tobacco coupons
Bunch of EN-, hull? Well, sir, there Is
what gets my goat.
There's exhibit A. Here, take EN-.
put 'em in your pocket Any more !
get are going over the same route. I'm
done. | know when get mine good
and plenty, and I've got it.
"Say, I'm so mad ] can't talk and
I'm tired of making gestures. Heaven
is my home, but if they ever hear u.
In heaven some OF the things I'm say
ing inside now III never get home.
Here's the idea !, Listen to this.
Don't go way; i':n going to tell you
something that'll make your eyes
cross.
I'm smoker. I'm no smokestack,
see? | smoke few cigars-four or
I fye a day-good smokes. All the to-
haeco stores, pretty nearly, give cou-
| )ons. | save EN-. Some of EN- blue;
| some of 'em green. You know. Reg
llar coupons.
"Other day l got prize list, see?
Read it over Say, son, it's full of good
hlngs. Seems like every doggoned
thing | ever wanted is there. Bet you
he guy that picked out that bunch
knew his business. Regular wise old
| 3wl.
Now listen. ! read it all over and
was just about deciding on cocobola
nairbrush when all of a sudden my
better nature came to- the front, Son
| make a wish. Never give way to your
| better nature. It's sure to get you in
| trouble.
mo l says, says |. I had the fun
| smoking the cigars Now I'll be a
| sport. 1t was my money, and I'll bet
| they stung me more than the price OF
| the prize in reducing the weight of the
| rigar, but I'm game. Home. to the wife
| of my bosom, says. Besides, | thinks
| when she sees the women's things she
| IAN get with those coupons it will put
| noe in soft Soft? Did it? Say, I'm
| telling this story.
Il wraps the coupons up in nice
| bundle and gets new book from the
store all about what swell things WON
en- can get And mind you there's not
| 25 cents additional gag like there used
| to be when was kind. Well anyhow
| took the whole outfit home
There says to my wife. See
| what brought to you. Look over that
cats lcgue of things you can get. I've
brought the entire thing fome to you
| Take your time. Read the book all
| through. And then leave it on the
ureau, says, because I'd like to look
it over again myself t
Say, son, she took EN-. I can see
| ycu are not well,' she says-just like
hat. I'm always suspicious Of you,
| Henry. when you begin TO get eener.
| GUS she says. Now wouldn't that take
tie wind out Of your sails?
We'll, sir, l could see she liked the
| crize list. She read 1t, and read 1t. and
he didn't say anything at all. The,
| the counted the coupons. Ever see :
oman count anything? Well. she hal
hose coupons all over the table. all
yer the door, all over the chairs. II
took her half an hour to count them.
Henry she says. give me your
| pencil l gaYe It to her. She licked
ne end of it--women always do--ani
| began to figure. She figured an over
the. hook, oil over the newspaper. all
svsr the coupons. Al last she says:
Two hundred and fifty.' she says.
by gracious. she hit Il right. too.
I don't know how she did It. but there
we're Just that many. Henry sh.
Jays. how much % you have to speed
the store 10 get one OF these eoN
..onsr she says. ( told her ; quarter.
Then she figured, AgAin. cid broh-
ne pencil put . new point on II an.
| she kept on figuring. At last she snifi.
and says: 'te3.So.' abe says-iust nike
that, 'Sixty-two dollars and any cents.
she says. You have spent ee3.S0 for to-
bacco when you have been telling mo
| you couldn't AFFORD to buy me any
more hats, and you would not get my
xatch that dropped fxed because II
cost 81.
$50 she says. I've got to the bot.
| tom of this. There IL where the money
goes. Sixty-two dollars and nifty cents
YOU spent for tobacco. No wonder you
are always so poor. ARd now you want
d.