The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1909-09-17
Woman's Adaptsbili,y
in Married Life

(N-~N~N-~N-1N>~N-N ->~-<~N<N~~N~t
\ woman begins upon her wedding
day that suppression OF herself aud
her otherwise visible emotions that life
from year to year requires OF her. Why
IL has become a matter 81 established
and expected form that on tie occasion
OF the most sacred AMI personal affairs
of lifc-thc bridal and the burial
doors should be thrown opca ana
cloud Of witnesses should bc asked In
10 view the exhibition. Is explained
only by the love Of the spectacular or
by the survival Of the old interest in
gladtoral shows and the batting OF
the bear
But the public welding in the
crowded church. or with the tmong Of
guests NJ home. has become a usual
thing. and the brides business * 10
look as lovely as fate allows and TO
show no atom Of emotion or Of inner
feeling. neither that OF a Venus Nictrix
or of "A lamb led 10 the slaughter. Ii Is
not IN easy task. but she usually sue
cecds in IL; and when well done II
helps her, with various previous ex-
permentS. 10 keep In the background,
NV III lVi-s ihutu VI Ah' iNh't W.
dence Of herself which She finds il
best TO reserve from sight and knowl
edge.
There may bc many thing about
her husband not TO her taste. as with
equal possibility there may be much
about her not TO his taste, either;
things seen IN the familiarity of mar
ried life and ungue~sed before, but
which husband and wife gan no more
change now than the leopard can
change his spots. The husband. the
wife. was loved before. it j. still de-
sired by both TO love ana To be loved,
maintain the warmth of mutual affec-
ton. each is still dear in spite Of any
fault: and thus Il very necessary sup
preston Of personal tastes and prefer
enccs takes place almost az once.
III. for instance. Il wife said Just
what she thought, or showed Just what
she felt. concerning her husbands
friends who come into her purview.
there would either be a great disturb
ance upon the spot. and il would be
found out who was master. or the hus-
band would take TO meeting his friends
somewhere outside the home. where II
her.
or, again, a wife perhaps objects TO
her husbands pipe or cigar. but she
knows very well that it is wise not 10
waste herself upon the small vices. but
TO reserve her reprobation for the
greater occasions. She may very pos
sibly find things that are unpleasant TO
her in the traits of her husbands fam
ily-but of what use to betray it?
Without question he may feel the same
about hers. and ii gives away her ad-
vantages 10 express IL. There they are;
and the wisest and pleasantest course
for her is 10 suppress her feeling. And
in the course of time the feeling that
is Representatives, xaspcratcd TO
outburst or stimulated TO ranker
growth-almOst ceases to exist. one
thing which. as a rule, aever does
cease 10 exist. is her objection 10 the
way I'm which her husband corrects the
children. Yet TO lift an eyebrow about
ii she knows is not only likely TO make
a bad matter worse, but is bad for the
children themselves: and not by look
askance-unless positive and unbear-
able cruelty supervene-wll she dis
thority.
Nor does any Of this imply that there
is TO be the least deceit on the part Of
the wife. If she is asked. or If sho
finds it necessary. she will declare her
state Of mind: but experience and OBJ
servation have shown her that tact il
the viceroy Of success. and that IL ac-
complishes much more than the direct
means OF open opposition do.
Moreover, great love will always
make her wish that her husband
should be first. should have his own
way wherever il is possible; and !.
tells her that he would too often give
up his way for hers II he knew her
way were other than his: and she fire.
quently derives her greatest happiness
in keeping her differing way effectu-
ally out Of sight. Indeed that woman
whose marriage has been most con
spicuously a happy one might tell you
IL she wOuld-that il has been so large
~ through long self-effacemcnt and
suppression In many things. the bal
ance OF satisfaction being struck in
others. and that il is not alone the
women Cf the convcnt-cell who are
seen only behind wells and lattces.