davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

of me from my principles and not
from my person"
During the Lincoln-Douglas debates
Judge Douglas one day espied the
form of Lincoln crossing the stage and
convulsed the audience by exclaim-
ing:
"As gaze on the lengthy and atten
uated form of my adversary ! am
tempted to eXclaim in the language of
holy writ, How long, o Lord. how
longT"
When Lincoln's turn came he waited
until Douglas had to cross the plat
form, when he calculated:
AS l gaze on the short and squat
form of my adversary | am tempted to
The wicked shall be cut short in their
generation
This recalls Douglas charge that
Lincoln sold liquor in a grocery and
Lincoln's retOrt that the only differ
ence between them was that he was
behind the bar while Douglas was in
front of it.
w HtU tue HtdTu ltldI tUeTc
was firing in the direction of Burn
sides army he said he was glad of 1t
and explained the unusual statement
by telling a story of neighbor who
had large flock of children. Wheney-
er she heard one of them cry she ex.
claimed, Thank God. there's one OF
my children amt dead yet
| At the time Mr. Lincoln had the
| varioloid he took cheerful view of it
remarking that he was glad he now
| had something to give that the Office
seekers did not want"
AS boy Lincoln went to mill. One
day he complained at the slowness OF
! the grinding.
my dog at hometcould eat that grist
as fast as it comes out of the burr OF
that MILL" he said.
Yes. maybe he could for awhile
replied the miller. but how long coult
he keep it up?"
It'll he starved to DEATH" flashed
Lincoln
One of the most famous Lincolr
! jokes was his horse trade, which wa.
| to be "sight unseen" At the appoint
! ed time Lincoln's adversary, certain
Judge excited shouts of laughter b,
leading up the sorriest old ''crow
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10
A Generous Gift

Professor Munyon has just issued
most beautiful, useful and complete al
manac. 1t contains not only all the sci
entific information concerning the moons
phases, in all the ATTITUDES, but has IL
Illustrated articles On how to read char
acter by phrenology, palmistry and birth
month. 1t also tells all about card read
ing. birth stones and their meaning, and
gives the Interpretation of dreams. 1t
teaches beauty culture, manicuring,
gives weights and measures and antidotes
for poison. In fact, it is Magazine Al
manac, that not only gives valuable in
formation, but will afford much amuse-
ment for every member Of the family,
especially for parties and evening enter
tainments. Farmers and people in the
rural districts will find this Almanac al
most invaluable.
1t will be sent to anyone absolutely
free on application to the Munyon Rem
sdy Company, Philadelphia, Pa.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

Concerning Meade he once said. "Of
the two great efforts to enslave the
human race in body and in mind the
first met its grave 200 years ago under
Cromwell at Marston Moor and the
second met its doom under General
Meade at Gettysburg"
His remarks concerning General
Grant are as famous as their subject.
II can't spare this man: he fights"
was one. When Grant was accused of
incompetence the presidents retort is
equally celebrated, IF l knew what
brand of whisky he drinks l would
send a barrel to some of the other gen
erals" At another time he said that
Grant was the first general he had had.
All the others asked for impossibilities.
Grant did not, but accomplished things
with the supplies furnished him.
The best of his encounters with the
generals, however, was at the time of
the surrender of Harpers Ferry. The
president tried to fix the responsibility
for the capitulation. In the inquiry he
sent for Halleck. Schenck. Milroy and
Hooker. Each denied responsibility.
Lincoln seemed disturbed and strobe
across the room several times. Finally
his face lighted up. II have 1t: l
| know who is responsiblee' he cried.
"Who, Mr.. President? Who is it?" the
| four cried In chorus. Gentlemen, Gen
eral Lee is the man." That sort of wit
| cuts to the quick.
One day clerical delegation called
| upon Lincoln. and the large voiced
| spokesman said that they. had been
sent by the Lord to insist on a certain
policy.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

longer use saucers for that purpose
Is it also time to dispense with the
senate?
To a young man who wanted an ap-
pointment rs chaplain. but did not
know what regiment the president
said, Young man. didn't you know
you always have to choose the girl be-
fore you go to the parson?"
Attorney General Bates hair had re-
tanned its original dark color, while his
beard was white. Bates could not ex-
plain the reason. IF you don't know,
Bates, ! do" laughed his chief. sit
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

SHOOT ME- mark hat he
would like to borrow the army If Nc
Clelian was not going to use it."
When some one remarked that Nc
Clellan was fine engineer the presi-
dent quickly replied that he must be
stationary engineer"
To General Hooker he once tele-
graphed: IF the head Of Lees army
is at Martinsburg and the tail of 1t on
the plank road between Fredericks-
burg and Charlottesville, the animal
must be very slim somewhere. Could
You not break himg'
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10
NEVERAL OF
- his mots con

AeE ' EhaL Oh
- his mots con
corning Gen
eral Mcclellan are
famous. McClel-
Ian Of t e IL com
pl Il / n G d of bad
weather, W h i C u
caused Lincoln 20
remark that the
weather was as
bad for Lee as for
US and added,
mcclellan seems
to think, in de-
fance of Scrip
ture, that heaven
sends it's raj n
only on the just
and not on the
unjust"
Anent Little
Macs" do-nothing
policy. every one
remembers Lin
coins famous re.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

THE "ICAED SHALL an Ep1scopaIian!
BE CUT SHORT. he asked. The
senator somewhat grumpily admitted
it. Il thought So" said Lincoln. 'You
swear so much like Seward. Seward
is an Episcopalian. But you ought to
hear Stanton swear. He can beat you
both. He is Presbyterian"
One of Mr.. Lineoln's warmest friends
was Leonard SWEET. When the Joint
debates with Douglas were about to
come off SWEET remarked that he be-
lieved Lincoln could beat the Little
Giant" mo, Len" replied Lincoln, II
can't beat him for the senate. but I'll
make him beat himself for the presi-
dency."
This collection would not be COM
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

plete without Abraham Lincoln's pre-
scrirtion fer n friend who complained
of being in poor health. 1t read:
Don't worry! Eat three square meals a
day. Sa. your prayers. Think of your
wife. BE courteous to your creditors.
Keep your digestion good. Steer clear of
biliousness. Exercise. Go slow and go
easy. Maybe there are other things that
your especial case requires to make you
happy. but, my dear friend. these. I
reckon, will give you a good lift.
All of this shows that Mr.. Lincoln
was not only good story teller. but a
good prophet of things to come Many
people are now healthier and happier
for taking that kind of prescription.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10

is because you
have always used
your chin so
much more than
your head"
A certain bunch
of politicians once
advised Lincoln
to prevaricate on
a certain subject.
Now, ge t | G.
men," he replied.
lit is of no use.
l can't lie. I've
tried it. and | al
ways make a fail
ure."
Senator Fessen-
den once went to
the White House
very angry. The
president knew of
his wrath and
sought to mollify
it. Say, Fessen-
den, aren't you
an EDiscoDalian2o
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-10


49,
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

anybody interfere with my plans. il
l can help it,"
The Colloquy was between Miss
Marian Rochester and reporter
Miss Rochester has agreed to make
balloon flight, and "A parachute
jump with Otha c. Odell some day
during fair week When the fact
first became known it was believed
to be only joke. and Miss Roches-
ter was sought for notification.
Indeed it's no joke" she said. Il
mean it, and will certainly take the
ride the first day Mr.. Odell tells me
the conditions are promising for the
attempt There are two things I
have always wanted to do as far
back as l can remember. One was
to see a prize fight and the other
was to ride in a balloon. | have
seen a prize fight. and am satisfied
in that respect. This is the first
chance / have ever had to sail
throug hthe air. and / am surely go
ing to take advantage of it
She was asked if il was her pur-
pose to take up parachute jumping
as a vocation. She said il is not, so
far as she now knows. but she can
answer that question better after she
has tried it, She thinks it will be
great sport, and. anyhow, she is will
ing to accept all the chances for the
novelty of one flight. She reserves
the right to get scared and never
take another. or to take up the bust
ness of professional jumper, if the
experience quickens her interest rath-
er than dampens her ardor
Miss Rochester is a member of the
company now playing at the Majes-
tic theater She is a bright-eyed
blonde. with smiling face. a dispo-
sition of bubbling good nature and a
bit Venturesome, if he present reso-
luton may be taken as an index. 1t
is no more than her due, nor is il
drawing an odious. comparison. to
say that she is at least one of the
pretties and most winsome of the
chorus girls that have been tarrying
in Phoenix during recent weeks.
There is rather an odd coincidence in
the fact that in the bill in which she
has been appearing recently at the
AIdJtSllt, Silt las DttH SllSiilS a SoIie,
Take Me Up. Up. Up With You.
Dearie," the song having to do with
the lines of the play that bear on a
certain balloon ascension which is
one of the features. 1t is a little odd
that right now while she is singing
the song. should come the answer to
her nightly and somewhat thoughtless
musical prayer. Miss Rochester is
lowering around the age of 90 de-
gree of maturity that entities her to
free agency If she will fly. il is
hard TO see how anybody can stop
her. And nobody who talks to her
can doubt that she is game, or help
but wish her the best of luck.
Mr. Odell says he will not permit
her to fly unless conditions are right,
so there can be no reasonable doubt
of a fair chance for successful trip.
For that reason he says it is too
early to name the day until the
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
BUT WHAT SAFEST THou7p

We have saved the soul of the mar
that killed;
We have turned To- shrive the thief;
We restored the pride OF the man thai
lied.
. But for her that fell ave have fash
{ toned hell
With a faith all stern and just
Ii was so of old and no man has told
What our Lord wrote in the dust
We have sighed betimes of our broth
ers' crimes
And have babe them be of cheer.
For the flesh is weak and the soul
grown meek
May yet read its title clear
But we draw away from the one
astray.
AS the truly righteous must
She is cursed. indeed.-and we did
not read
What our Lord wrote in the dust
For the men who thieved, and who
killed and lied
Who have slain the woman's soul
We have worked and prayed and have
seen them made
All clean and pure and whole,
But we drive her out with righteous
shout
In our Pharisaic trust.
So the man goes free-but we do not
What our Lord wrote in the dust.
Chicago Post.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
OUR NAVY" DEL|NEATEO
IN FIREWORKS At FAIR
Special Prizes Will Be Awarded For
the Best Photographs of the
Display.

One of the novel and spectacular
features OF fair week will be the fire
works display Thursday night. This
will be under the supervision of w. II.
Wilson. representing the Los Angeles
Fire Works company. He arrived in
town yesterday and brought with him
a carload of material for the display.
Wilson has just come from Seattle.
where he took first prize over Pain
and the Consolidated Fireworks com
pany Of New York The big set piece
in his exhibition will be called "Our
Navy"
Special prizes of so and IS will be
given for the best snapshots Of the
fireworks display. All really good pic
lures viii be in line for second prizes
of So 1t is not necessary for those
who try for these prizes to be equipped
with high priced cameras The best
pictures of the display taken last year
at the fair and also of the Seattle dis
play were made with the cheaper ko-
oaks. Some of these night pictures
win be on exhibition today at Berry
hills window.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

I weather conditions of next week are
apparent. He has sent to his head
quarters in San Bernardino for an
other parachute. 1t is planned for
both to ascend on the same balloon.
and when the proper height and con-
ditions have been reached. he will cut
her parachute loose and then follow
in his own. His balloon is the
largest hot-air bag in the world, and
can easily take two persons aloft if
well inflated. The second parachute
is expected here today.
Thus it is seen that the aerial-navi-
CATION department of the territorial
fair continues. To expand, and Ari
IONA still ranks in the worlds fair
classes. with single and double para
chute jumping and the prospective
exhibition of a home grown aerojlane
of the Fowler model. Arizona be-
lieves in encouraging Arizona flyers
as well as Arizona speed makers and
live stock growers.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
Her LIFE
A BURDEN
Now Lady Says She Would Not Be
Placed Back Where She Was
For Whole World.

Ratcliff. Tex.-"Two years ago my
health was very bad" writes Mrs.
Matte Campbell. OF this place.
Il suffered untold misery every
month. 1t is useless to say where my
worst aches were. for | ached all over
every month.
AT times | wished for death to
end my suffering. for life was a bur-
den to me.
Finally I decided to take Cardui
First / tried one bottle and it helped
me so much I ordered $500 worth. I
took the six bottles. which kept me
in fine health for one year and saved
a large doctors bill
Il took six more bottles and can
now say that L. bottles of Cardui
have stopped my suffering. made life
worth living and filled my home with
joy and happiness.
Il would not be placed back. like
was two years ago, not for this whole
world rolled at my feet.
your wonderful medicine. Cardui,
has my praise for all it's great works
and | do wish that every suffering
woman in the world would only try
this grand medicine
If, you suffer as Mrs. Campbell did,
be sure that Cardui win help you. as
it did her.
Why not try it?
Your druggist sells it.
Ask him.
n. B.-Write to: Ladies' Advisory
Dept. Chattanooga Medicine Co.
Chattanooga. Tenn, for Special In
structions. and 64-page book. Home
Treatment for Women sent in plain
wrapper, on request
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
MARIAN ROCHESTER
THE FLYING GIRL
Latest Attraction Announced for the
Territorial Fair.
ooh. I'm just crazy to go!"

" INIT Ndtt VIII II DC
ct hasn't been settled yet. but the
sooner the better. for l am awfullS
anxious. My friends have all tried
to dissuade me. but the more they
plead the more determined / am.
When / make up my mind don't let
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
BYRON sps sSo

Guarantees to cure rheumatic govt and
sciatica where no other organic disease
exists. 2 LIZ hours from San Francisco.
Buy tickets and check baggage direct to
Byron. Cal. Delightful environment: one
of California's best hotels. Address Man
ager Byron Hot Springs Hotel p. o..
Cal for booklet.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
OF LOCAL INTEREST

PACKARD IN TOWN-R. A Pack
ard. one of the fair commissioners.
arrived yesterday and has his eye on
the gun. II is aimed at the biggest
and best fair ever.
EN- ROUTE TO BOARD MEETING
President F. NJ. Murphy of the De-
veiopment Company of America ar
rived from Prescott late yesterday
afternoon and last night Jeff for Sill
verbell. where he will meet w. F.
stanton. Mr.. Murphy will then go
10 Tombstone. where the meeting of
the company win be held Mr.. Muir
ply expects to return To Phoenix be-
fore the close of the fair.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
NOTICE TO MILK CUSTOMERS

Owing to the high price of butter
and the scarcity of milk. we find our
selves compelled to advance the price
of milk to S Is cents per quart on
and after Monday. November Sth. 1903.
VALLEY PRIDE CREAMERY
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
TO EVERY MAN HIS WORK.

Set me but do my work from day to
day
In field or forest. at the desk or
loom,
In roaring market place or tranquil
room.
Let me but find il in my heart to say,
When vagrant wishes beckon me as
tray:
This is my work; my blessing. not
my doom;
OF all who live 1 am the only one
by whom
This work can best be done in the
right way"
Henry Van Dyke.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

Get into business at Glendale, have
for rent. plate glass front brick store
room, best location in Glendale. Ap-
ply at once to Stauffer. "a West
Adams
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

IT'S HERE-The merry go-round
is here. and that is the last and best
evidence that everything is in readi-
ness for The big fair
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

WANTED-Delivery boy familiar
with city Hackett Market
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06
BOARD OF coNTRoL-There w

F! BOARD OF cONTROL-There was
J a short meeting of the board of con-
I troll yesterday for the transaction of
routine business
IT'S HERE-The merry go-round
is here. and that is the last and best
evidence that everything is in readi-
ness for The big fair.
GLOBE vISlTOR-Henry VI. Woods
Of Rice Station. ella county justice
of the peace. is in the city attending
the examination for the practice Of
law.
LISTING ROoMs-The listing of
rooms at the bureau of information
at the board of trade is going for
ward nicely. There is now pretty
good list. but il cannot be too long
and the invitation is repeated for all
who can spare a room in the interest
of the city's hospitality to report
what they have for use if needed.
THE scoTTsDALE SCHOOL
HOUSE-The money is now ready
for the building of the new school
pose the board of supervisors lately
Valley Bank and the money was yes
terday turned into the county treas
ury. The bonds brought a premium
of 1923, with accrued interest. $50.
so that there is now available for
the building S5,273.
rD,kirrN puttpNn co..,;ao. ,,;I
be held tomorrow, twenty second Sun
gay after Trinity. in Trinity church.
South Second avenue. facing the court
house, the Rev. julius w. Atwood,
rector. as follows: kindergarten and
Sunday school at 10 O'Clock; Holy
Communion and sermon at IL O'Clock.
Service in Tempe at $3.50 O'Clock. and
in Mesa at 1880 O'Clock. AT the COM
munion service the following musical
numbers win be given: Organ. invo-
cation, Alfonso Mailly: offertory an
them. Thy VIII Be Done" II. House.
ley. quartette; postlude .allegretto
from OPP. So. +. Volkmann-
MR.. CANNING PROVOKED W.
Canning was provoked yesterday. 1t
may even be said that he was mad.
someone without MS knowledge OF
consent took his horse and buggy
from in front of the Fleming block.
where he had the horse tied. drove
the animal an hour or two and when
through with il left the horse hitched
on West Adams street. From APP
pearances. the horse had been driven
very hard and was well tired ami
NAL when he found it. Mr.. Canning
says that if he can discover the iden-
tity OF the party who took the horse
he will prosecute him. lie says he
knows there are some people in this
town who would like to hand him
lemon. and 1t is all right when they
do. but he does not-.think ii fair To
dumb brute TO have the lemon in
tended for him, handed to his horse.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

a short meeting of the board of con-
troll yesterday for the transaction of
routine business
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

Big Territorial Fair Week, Novem-
Der Sth to 14th.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

GLOBE vISlTOR-Henry VI. Woods
Of Rice Station, ella county justice
of the peace. is in the city attending
the examination for the practice of
law.
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

Here's a special that will
cause active buying. Pet
ticoats Of Taffeta SILK in
nearly every known color,
and worth at lowest esti-
mates4.5O each. Special.
$50. :. ...... So. 50
Arizona republican., 1909-11-06

An extraordinary bargain
today. These beautiful
Pillow Tops are shown
in a great variety of sub
jects. All beautiful-some
stores ask you soc for
same quality. Extra spec
ial today ...12Iac
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

Present County Judge. Who Now Has
No Mustache to Decoi,e You
smith shop. !. depot, !. Adams ey-
press office. /; coal house. l.
In the proceedings 4 the first
council meeting is pasted a clipping
from the Las Animas Leader 4 Ing
the flll tCXl Of Mayor Denay's inaus.
ural address. as ( l.Ows:
Tn first muui,i.al election in Bent
county took place ON Thursday last
at La Juuia, as per special telegram
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

or outside calumny viii destroy her
Yes ITS the light shining from the
common schools that lights up and
runs the world" tcheors Yes, and
tho contamination Of the municipal H..
corporation and election OF officers
today means law and order. II means
a government OF the people by the
people and for the people, as the ma.
tional sentiment goes. II means In.
tcrnal Improvement. II means more.
II means love for that system of
stratod by our laws-town. county
government Of the people as demon.
state and national. ma against the ef.
fctc monarchial system Of the old
world. tChcers.l Ny heart sweils
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

Three cheers were then given with
great unanimity for the new mayor
and the delegation went to serenude
the council.
During the first month the city
council met almost daily, Icing en-
gagged in passing ordinances on first.
second and third reading. Avery
Turner was elected town treasurer.
Tom Walsh city marshal. Frank Mix
on poll tax collector. and J. r. Rus
sell police ma gistrate. cry Marshal
Walsh resigned after three months
service and John Melville was elected
TO succeed him
On August Is, 1852. J. c. Denny
rendered his resignation as mayor
and John Fisher, one of the trustees.
was elected to succeed him. Martin
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

Hnllingsworth, John Fisher and Frank
Nixon.
The first few pages Of the minute
book of La Juna's first city council
is taken up with list Of the books
contained In the La Junta Sunday
School Library. lSSl"-a very appro.
pirate beginning for such a wild and
woody town as La Junga then was.
The library numbered ei.hty vol
umes. commencing with "Jessicas
First Prayer" and winding up with
that absorbing novel, Lulu Preston's 5
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

In higher altitude, a pur,r air. all
of which can bring forth nothing tut
freedom. INppia sci You have III.
best school house IN the state. and
the best furnished. with school tern
from six 10 ten months In each year
by the best teachers When ! make
this statement it's the same as au.
noncins to the world that La lunla
Is safe that La Junla h good
place TO live in and bring up a fam.
ily, and that neither internal strife
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

most but she has the sinow and the
power To walk alone and govern her
self IApplause.l \ village contain
ing live II en- with advanced ideas;
men who sink a1y personal comfort
and feelings out Cf silht and work
for the good Of the whole with
these kind Of men your future is Sc
cure Voice That's So We are
incorporated under the most liberal
of state laws in tho most liberal OF
states; the centennial state,with her
rich valleys. her mighty mountains,
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

chief nffice In your town time only
will tell You must judge my future
by my past. | have no axes 10 gr nd.
40 ir nds to htlr. aud no es 70
app at ta.r the cath Gf office
uutrammelled. and VIII 10 the best
my ability assist The mril you
ll.e llst elected to pass ard enforce
he best laws pcs 10, fr The good
Of The whole community This Is a
youas Village. sprung Ep In a day al.
La Junta tribune., 1909-11-27

Trials and Trlumphs
Then fllows complete census
Of La Junta, giving the Eamo. age.
color and sex uf each inhabi'ant. with
a list Of the number Of buildings In
town. There was total population
OF 2sj. segregated thusly: Male. white
2j2. male. colOred. I: females. 49,
School house. section houses. 9.
restaurants. .: boarding hou,es. 2.
residences, H.. freight cars used a
dwellings. so. saloons. 3. general
store. /; carpenter shop. round
house, ! pump and enEinc house. !
Ice house. /. barber shop. /. black.