davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
Gives a Humorous Talk.

At Metropolitan Baptiss Church last night Rev.
J. J. Muir. pastor q Temple Bap-tst Church de-
livsred short address on The humorous SIDE Of
a minister's life" in which he related several
amusing incidents Vocal selections were given by
Mis- Harriet Harding An informal supper was
given IN honor q Or. Muir by the members Of the
Gilbert Sunday school class
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
Capt. Knight Coming Here.

Capt. A. ". Knight Of the United States
cruiser Washington. has received orders TO
leave his ship at Tacoma, Wash, and re-
port Immediately al Washington. 10 be
come president Of the special board Of
navy ordnance. Capt. knight will be
succeeded by Capt. Rogers. Of the United
States cruiser Milwaukee. TOW stationed
at the Puget Sound Navy Yard
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
AIexnndrin Commends d. c. FIremen

The city council or Alexandra has for
warded resolutions 10 the District Com
missioners expressing appreciation of the
work Of the Washington IRE department
in the disastrous blaze OF May z in the
Virginia city.
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
Rev. Carrothers Returnr.

Rev. S. G. CaHuthers returned yesterday from the
A. n E. Zicn Conference. Just closed at Williams
port. Pa DT. CaTTc;hers has been appointed foz
the eighth consecutive year pastor of Zion Church
bv Bishop J. 5. Smith
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
Death of L. Ro.enthaI.

Louis ROsenthal. ffty-three years old,
brother-In-law OF Joseph Auerbach, a
welI-known clothier. committed suicide
yesterday afternoon by firing a bullet into
his temple from a revolver. The manner
Of RosenthaTs death aroused suspicion
at first, but after an investigation by the
police and coroner a certificate Of death
by suicide was issued.
Mystery surrounds the cause Of the
mans dependency. but it is believed he
committed the deed in a sudden 1T Of
melanchola caused by Ill health and aug
mented by the gloomy weather Of yester-
day ROsenthal was a bachelor, and was
considered q happy man. His father,
who died months ago. left him a sum OF
money, which made him independent
A number Of peculiar circumstances sur
round the death Of Rosenthal The most
remarkable OF these IS the position in
which the body was found. He sat on
a chair. looked into a small mirror held
IN his right hand placed a .32-caliber
revolver 10 his left temple, and pulled
the trigger. Between the palm Of his
hand and the mirror Rosenthal held 2
lighted cigar OF the brand he was known
TO smoke.
When found the suicide was sitting up
right in the chair in which he ended his
life. the revolver clenched in his left
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
VON inertia
Committee Of Chamber Ap-
proves Recommendation.
SENDS IT TO THE DIRECTORS

Committee on Public Schools Dis
eusses Merits OF Candidates for
Takes Attitude of Opposition TO Mr.
AshfOrd-QuestiOn Long Discussed.
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27

Continued from Page One.
ing made. Ball is survived BY his wife and
six brothers. all Of whom are well known
in Virginia and this city.
With last words OF advice 20 her chill
dren written on a small piece OF paper
clasped 20 her breast, and the end Of q
rubber tube attached 20 q gas Jet between
her lips, Mrs. Elizabeth Allen, forty-fve
years old. was found dead yesterday az
teruoon on a bed in her room by her
youngest son. George. aged thirteen years.
The woman IS believed 10 have com
mitted suicide because Of dependency
over continued 81 health. For several
years she had suffered from rheumatism,
and recently appeared morose over Ill
ness. According 70 her husband. Harry
Allen. who IS employed al Luna Park.
the woman did not allow any one 20 know
she contemplated taking her life. Her
death was a sudden shock 10 Allen. who
vas almost prostrated by the news
Allen left his home Al y Randolph
street northwest about S O'Clock yester-
day morning, bidding his wife gOod-by on
the front porch OF their home Mrs.
Allen followed her husband 10 the front
door and kissed him good-by, asking him
70 come home as early in the afternoon
as possible
Half an hour after the husband and
father departed. the two sons. George
and his brother Ralph. aged seventeen
years. left home for school Mrs. Al
len cheerly ba6e her sons good-by for
the day. AMI asked one OF the boys
20 make a purchase for her cn his way
home from school. That was the last
time the boys saw their mother alive.
Nrs. Allen returned 10 the dining
room, cleared the breakfast table OF
dishes. put the rooms Of the house IN
order. and went 20 her bedroom on the
second floor she locked the door from
the inside and put the key on a bureau.
She then sat down 20 a writing table and
wrote a note 20 her husband and sons.
The woman asked that her body be ere
mated. and gave the boys advice about
caring for themselves after her death.
She told them 20 take exercise and
strive 20 avoid disease OF every kind. as
illness caused most Of her suffering in
ne.
Mrs. Allen attached a rubber tube 10 a
gas 5et. turned on the flow Of gas. and
lying down on her bed, placed the end
OF the tube IL her mouth. Windows n
the room were closed. and it IS thought
the woman was asphyxiated in a short
time
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
DURAND SUCCEEDS
CENSUS DIRECTOR
North Tenders His ReSigna-
tiOn to the President.
FOLLOWED CLASH WITH NAGEL

Dispute Arose When New Secretary
of Commerce and Labor saw Ad-
vertisements for Bids for Construc-
tIon of TabuIating Machines Which
Were Not Authorized by Him.
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
Detected Odor of Gas.

Shortly after 5 o'clock IN the afternoon,
the bc-s returned home. Ralph stopped
few minutes 10 make a purchase al a
grocery store. while George entered the
house. The boy detected the odor Of gas
as soon as he opened the door. Mrs. Irene
Topham, a neighbor. who lives az 36
Randolph street. was on the porch of
her house. and George called 10 the wO-
man. telling her the house was full of
gas Mrs Topham walked TO the Allen
house and entered wiki George The
couple went to the second floor. where the
odor was strongest They found the
door 70 Mrs. Aliens bedroom locked and
became suspicious that something was
wrong. Men we're called into the house,
and the lock was broken George was
the first 10 enter the room, and found
his mother dead on the bed.
A pathetic scene was enacted while the
boy endeavored 20 gain q response from
his mother. Allen was notified at Luna
Park. and Coroner hewitt called at the
house. A certificate OF death by suicide
was issued and the body left in charge Of
Anen. The bereaved husband declares
his wife's last wish concerning the ere
nation of her body will be followed.
Arrangements for the funeral have not
nn1v r-oTa
The Washington herald., 1909-05-27
THREE SUICIDES
is DAYS RECORD

Continued from Page One.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Making Her Reputation.

Making her reputation.
A we'll known young matron Of Chi.
cago Is Of such a high nervous temper.
ament that If she drinks the very
smallest amount Of alcoholic stimulant
before going to bed the result is sleep
Assness for the remainder of the night.
Some nights ago number OF friends
dropped in for the evening, and the
husband. who. by the way. Is south.
erner. suggested that he make mint
julep for each Of the company. The
suggestion was received with delight,
and the juleps were promptly mixed.
In his wife's glass, however. he put
only enough whisky to flavor the wa
ter, probably not more than a tea
spoonful OF this she slipped about
half. The result. however. was the
same She was troubled with insomnia
all night long, and 1t was not until B
o'clock In the morning that she drop
ped OF to sleep and, as a consequence,
was not called for breakfast
At 10 o'clock she came do ~nstairs
and hearing the voices Of children on
the front porch stopped to listen. Her
heart filed with motherly pride as she
heard her elder son. boy Of six, tell
ing seven or eight children from the
neighborhood that they must not make
too much noise as his mamma was
asleep. Imagine her horror, too; as the
young hopeful added:
"She drank SO much whisky last
night that she couldn't come down to
breakfast this morning"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Rheumatism Cannot be Cured
Unless Uric.O is Used.
Sudden Deaths, Heart Failure and
Paralysis Are Caused by Poisonous
Uric and Rheumatic Acids.

The Rheumatic person is skeptical re-
garding the claims of almost any remedy
as cure for Rheumatism and
one can scarcely blame him for being so.
All the plasters and liniments combined
never actually cured case of Rheuma-
tism. They may relieve it in one quarter
but it is sure to break out somewhere
else. The only true way to cure Rheu-
matism is to drive it from the system,
for as long as the Uric and Rheumatic
Acid remains in the blood, one is never
entirely free from the trouble. Uric-O
seeks out the Rheumatic poison in the
blood, muscles and kidneys, renders it
inert and harmless and drives it out of
the system. 1t is composed of perfect
antidotes for the rheumatic acid poison
in the system, and the secret of its won
derful success lies in the fact that it is
designed to cure Rheumatism only.
Uric-O is sold by druggists at 75c. and
81 90 the bottle. A liberal sample may
be procured by writing to the Smith
Drug Co., 220 Smith Bldg, Syracuse, N.
Y. Uric-O is sold and personally recon-
mended by F. A. Shurtleff & Co.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Wise William,

When Justice Buffum opened court in
a small town in southern Georgia, one
morning last week, he called loudly,
"Jones against Johnson!"
A dignified gentleman came to bar and
said: 81 am Doctor Jones, your Honor,
the complaining witness. My chickens
were stolen and found in the possession
Of"
zone moment, Doctor" the Judge
interrupted. 1--WE must have the de-
PENDANT at the bar. Jones against John
son! Jones against johnson! Is the de-
PENDANT present? Is William johnson In
court?"
A tall and shambling negro shuffled to
the bar, ducked his head, pulled his
woolly forelock in token of respect, and
grinned propitiatory grin.
"Ah's Willyum Johns'n, please sub,
Jedge," he said. "Ah doan' know muffin
bout no PENDANT, sub. Ah'm jes' de
man wot took de chick'ns."
"Don't talk like that" the court warn
ed William. "You onght to have a
lawyer to speak for you. Where's your
lawyer?"
"Ah aim got no lawyer, ledge"
every well, then" said his Honor.
"I'll assign a lawyer to defend you"
"Oh, no, sub; no, suhl Ple-e-ease don
do dat! William begged.
"Why notP" asked the Judge. ut
won't cost you anything. Why don't
you want a lawyer"
swell, sh'll tell yo', SUBJ" said Will
liam, waving his tattered old hat con-
fidentially. "Hit's jes' dis-a-wsy-ah
wan tub enjoy dem chick'ns masef."-
Harper's Weekly.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09

Cut the celery into crescent-shaped
pieces and slice the walnuts, using half
a. many nuts ~ celery. Add French
dreaming and arrange on celery leaves.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
How Jim cosgrove Finished.

So the captain was assigned to duty In
command Of the company at Weetches-
ter village, In the Borough Of the Bronx,
where FIRE alarms are not very frequent
and a man can rest. he went up there
cheerfully, and he seemed to feel gay st
being In the harness again. None Of us
kneT until after his death that ut this
time and until the end the Captain often
suffered from internal hemorrhages, the
result of that awful fall at the Durland
Ere. Even the light work OF suburban
FIRE company was too much for him. It
burdened his shattered nervous system,
80 that he broke down and had to 60 be-
fore the retiring board.
When he retired he took an agency for
q Wholesale firm, and In order to aid bis
new business venture I volunteered to
publish something about him In the
World. He had no photograph OF him.
self, but he promised to give me bis
complete record. Next day he brought
me sheet of note paper on which he
had written:
"Appointed, January l, 1878.
Appointed engineer, March, 1880.
Appointed lieutenant, June, 1881.
"Made captain, June, 1884,"
Remembering vaguely dozen or more
cases in which the Captain had made
heroic rescues, l exclaimed, "But what
about the hundreds Of lives you've
savedp"
"Well," he replied, ~ don't remem-
Der. You see, we're always running to
fires"
And this was true. Long familiarity
with deadly peril had made him forget
full Of it the moment 1t had passed. The
only rescue he could recall was comic
struggle with a drunken man who rolled
down ladder fighting him.
"But surely" said, "you can give
me more than that of your record"
"Well," said Captain Jim thought
fully, "you might add this: "Nevsr up
on charges. Always had the goodwill
of my men,"
Which, after all, is pretty good
record.-William Inglis, in Harper's
Weekly.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
The -
Scrap Book
Just Like Man,

JUST Like q MAN.
Mrs. Elizabeth Cady Stanton and q
body Of ladies from her church, all IN.
terested in women's suffrage, once took
a little newsboy from the gutter and
educated him superbly. They sent him
through school and college and finally
made a minister Of him. This young
minister, the work Of their hands,
preached his first sermon in their
church. That was proud Sunday
morning for the good ladies. They
thought they had at last firmly planted
among the male sex strong and
splendid supporter. So they filled the
church that Sunday morning. Who
could tell but that their young charge
might preach In their honor woman
suffrage sermon? Imagine their emo
ton when the youth arose in the pull.
pit. looking calmly and even sternly
over the congregation, and announced
that his text would be from st. Paul:
LET the women keep silence In the
church."
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09

The diagram shows how the edu-
rated hen laid twelve eggs in her crate
without having more than two eggs on
1 straight line.
No. 408.-States Of the Union: Ind.
la.-lndia; Fla. Me.-fame; S. c. Ore
score; La. Me.-lame; r. l. Me.-rime;
Ga. La.-gala; Del. La.-Della: Ga. Me.
game; Mo. Del.-model; Cal. La
.alla; o. Me. Ga.-0mega; La. 8. G. Ala.
-Lascala; Col o. N. Y.-colony; Ga.
3. G. o. N. Y.-Gastony,
No. 407. - Progressive Numerical:
Hearsay.
No. 40S.-Concealed Words: Lace.
thread. needles. floss. buttons. pins.
shears. spools, bodkin. worsted.
No. 400 Hidden Reversed Rivers: l.
velga g Elbe B. Obi 4. Lena. 8.
Nile Ottawa
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
sALMAaUNDI JELLY.

Cut up one banana and two small seed
less oranges, and arrange In layers in q
mould; when full pour over cup or
more Of lemon jelly hot, and set away to
harden: serve with cream.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
A Lesson In Language.

A Lesson In Language.
IAN Irish lawyer" said a Texas
judge. twas examining Mexican.
The questions. after deal Of bullying,
ran like this:
Understand, sor. that ye are to 60
on and state to the court what re
know about this case In yer own Ian.
guidge.'
"'You want me to repeat the story
In my own languageY asked the wit
ness.
"rOi do. sor. That's what OF said
''Then the Mexican smiled and be-
gan:
"'Ete mujer venia mia casa
"The LAWYER brought his nst down
on the table with a bang.
care ye thryin' to make fools Of US
allT he r0ared. What's thot ye're
saying anyhow
81 am speaking my own language,
a. you told me to do said the witness.
"Oi didn't name for 70 to spaks ysr
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
A Pathetic Appeal.

~ tbHStl~ SrPPSe''
During the early days of street cars
many of the conductors made money
by knocking down" fares AT one
time the evil became SO great that 1t
vas Gi!Ht Ill, to tell whom to trust.
An old fellow who WIS In hard luck
found that 1t was necessary to get en-
ployment rs conductor. and he went
to the president Of one Of the New
York companies and asked him for a
position.
"Do you really want the job, BillT"
asked the president.
81 do, indeed"
"All right, Bill" he answered. "You
:an have 1t. but for heavens sake
bring back the carl"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
ignorant, but Careful.

Ignorance nearly always makes
fools Of u.s." said a lecturer. II re-
member a man, ignorant Of etiquette.
who once sat beside me at Q public
dinner noticed that this man. as
soon as he was seated. took up one
by one the knives at the right Of his
plate and began to try their edges on
his thumb. A waiter behind him
leaned forward and said in a hurt
tone:
"The knives are all sharp, SIR
"The point u.s. said my neighbor,
I'm looking for q blunt one. Last
time attended q banquet here I cut
ny mouth"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
! BULGARIAN Atrocity.

= Bulgarian Atroeity.
On his return to England from the
RussO-Turkish war David Christie
Murray. the novelist. went at once to
Hawardcn to report on the situation
In the Balkans to Mr.. Gladstone. He
wore his campaigning overcoat. a Won
derful creation Of camers hair lined
with bearskin. AS he was leaving
Hawarden Mr.. Gladstone. helping him
on with his overcoat. asked, where
did you obtain possession Of this ex-
tracrdinary garment. Mr.. Murray" 81
bought 1t. sir, in Bulgaria." answered
Murray "Ah." said Gladstone. with a
perfectly grave face and falling back
step to look at It. 81 have had much to
say Of the Bulgarian atrocities OF late
years, but this is the only one OF
which | have had ocular demonstra-
ton"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09

We want to talk to people who are
nervous, who suffer frequent headaches,
who don't enjoy their food, who are irri-
table, quickly lose their temper, are so
tired and worn out that they feel they
must give up, and have become so de-
spondent that life doesn't seem worth liv-
ing. We know exactly what is the mat
ter with people In this condition, and II
they will follow our advice, We can tell
them how to regain good health and that
buoyancy of feeling which makes life
seem all sunshine and happiness.
Most of the above described conditions
are chiefly caused by catarrhal inflamma-
ton of the mucous membranes. This
delicate web-like lining of the body be.
comes inflamed and congested until
weakness and mental depression follows.
The only way that this can be overcome
is through treatment of the blood. We
have the treatment, and We are so posi-
tive that It will produce the results we
claim for 1t that We will supply 1t to any
one with the understanding that we will
return to them every penny they paid us
In every instance where the treatment Is
not in every way satisfactory and bene-
fetal to them.
We want you to try Rexall Mucu. Tone,
which Ia a powerful nutritive tonic and
body builder, and q mucous membrane
Alternative that cleanses these membranes
and restores their natural and healthy
functions.
Rexall Mucu. Tone drives out all the
catarrhal poison, restores the mucous
cells to good health, tones up the whole
system, allays Inflammation, removes
congestion and stimulates the whole sys-
tenn to healthy activity. 1t is splendid
for building up flesh and muscle tissue
and removing all weaknesses.
Come to our store today and get bot
tie of Mucu-Tone, and after giving It
q reasonable trial, II you are not satisfied
simply tell us so, and we will band back
your money without question. Surely,
nothing can be more fair than this. Two
sizes, 80 cents and sl.0O. r. A. Shurt-
left & Co., South Paris, Maine.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
He Ate Everything.

ste NV
Willie, who is six years old, has fond
parents who try to break him OF the
habit of taking things on his plate that
he cannot eat and leaving much to 60
to waste. He is In a fair way to inn
prove under their watchfulness. The
other day Willie was invited to a
birthday party. His mother dressed
him in his best clothes.
"Now, mind. WILLIE" was the last
thing she said to him, "eat everything
you take on your plate"
Willie came home that evening with
severe pains. The little girl in whose
honor the party was given was thir-
teen years old. Her mother had baked
n birthday cake. and part Of the
scheme Of ornamentation Of 1t were
thirteen wax candles. There were
three of them on the piece that was
put on Willie's plate.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Choste's Ready Retort.

George Ticknor. the historian OF
Spanish literature. was once called rs
witness in a case In which Rufus
Choate was engaged and, being seated
by the eminent counselor, was attract.
ed by the notes which he had made OF
the evidence. After eying them with
interest he remarked that the writing
reminded him Of two autograph letters
in his possession-one Of Manuel the
Great of Portugal. dated 1912, and the
other Of Gonsalvo de Cordova, the
great captain, written a few years
earlier. (Any one who has glanced
over these remarkable specimens OF
chirography will marvel that 1t was
possible to make out syllable OF such
illegible scrawls)
"These letters" MT. Ticknor assured
Mr.. Choate, "were written $50 years
ago, and they strongly resemble your
notes Of the present trial"
Choate instantly replied: Remark
able men, no doubt. They seem to
have been much In advance OF their
time"
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09

GRAPEFRUIT AND CHERRY SALAD.
Cut the fruit through the center and
take out the sections, freeing them from
the white skin; let them stand a few
minutes in q French dressing. Place
some lettuce leaves on your salad plate,
using only the white ones; on these nest
the pieces of. grape fruit together with
maraschino cherries-enough to give a
good appearance to the salad.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Truth Will Not 30 Compelled.

Truth is such fly away, such sly
boots, so untransportable and unbar-
reliable a commodity, that 1t is as bad
to catch Us light. Shut the shutters
never so quick to keep all the light in
1t Is all in vain. 1t Is gone before you
can cry "Holdw And so 1t happens
with our philosophy. Translate, COL
late. distill all the systems and 1t steads
you nothing, for truth will not be COM
PEELED in any mechanical manner
Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
Her Introduction.

Clutterbuck. the historian. tells the
following anecdote Of his uncle, who
was a physician. One Of his patients,
nervous old lady. took 1t into her
head to try the Bath waters.
1.-THE very thing" said the doctor,
"and | know an excellent physician
there, to whom will give you let.
ter Of introduction" On the way this
patient vas overcome with curiosity.
1.-THE doctor has treated me for a
long time" she said to her friend. "but
he has never told me just what my
case is. have mind to look In this
letter and see II he describes 1t there"
Opening the epistle. she read:
Dear Sir-Keep the old woman three
weeks and send her back.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1909-03-09
DREAMERa ALL

We are dreamers all In this dream Of life.
And q very good dream. with Its toll. Its
strife,
It's song and laughter, its love and cheer.
Its loss and worry and grief and fear.
We are lreamers all In different way
In this toilIng world Of the workaday.
And, Coo be praised. in the dew. the dust.
There are dreams Of comfort and dreams
of trust.
We are dreamers all. from the child that
leaps
To the gray haired prophet that crawls
and cneeps.
Dreaming. trrvtIng and toilins on
To the dream of God on the hills Of dawn.
Baltimore Sun.