Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1909-05-29

expected Of me and always Wishing "
do the right thing, l sought out tne
committee and in my best Hoosler any
North Carolina dialect, ! prayed them
to tell me what was expected OF me.
One of them who is member OF my
church and hears me regularGlS-pe
cause he is an usher-said: on we
don't expect anything Of you. 1t is
inst this way We want you to Whlle
away the few minutes of restlessness
which always attend an after dinner
occasion preliminary 10 the real thing,
Then / remembered (reading OF
course) that just before the big nstlc
bouts they always throw IN Two OF
three light weights to whet the appe-
tites Of the spectators. / hesitated for
awhile. wondering what my distin-
puished relative, Jim, would think
when he saw the fair name OF Jeitrey
was a representative of light We1gnt.
Hunger however overcame me ana I
am here a willing servant-and very
full one.
after dinner speaking is not always
a safe thing. One can never tell what
will happen. 1t Is somewhat IKE the
odd black auntie who was quite ser
iously i'll. 1t was about three decades
back when the doctors had Just begun
to give their birthstone in capsules.
was rapidly growing worse. Her
grooming attracted some white child
rem who were passing. They mace
every attempt to get some response
from her without avail. one OF the
children found candle In another
room and approached her bed. When
the old auntie saw him with the hgnt-
ed candle she sat upright, ana lgh IN
ling flashing from her eyes and. her
Hips trembling with fear and her whole
frame ashake with emotion with wild
gesticuIations born Of approaching
disaster she said. Honey for de Lod's
sake go away, chile. you heah me,
Quick, Go way wild that light. Dun you
know dat you old auntie Is jes full OF
catidges?
However, a fellow can get along
fairly well IL he has four speeches as
follows: 1.-THE Glorious Fourth" THE
soldiers. Living and Dead" Woman,
God Bless Her. She is the Great Con-
undrum Of the Centuries, But If We
Can't Guess Her We will Never Give
Her Up" and "a Sweep at all Crea-
| ton" The address / am delivering
| this evening is the one entitled "A
Sweep at all Creation" i like It's lat
| titude and longitude. In speaking on
| # I have never wandered beyond the
| Legitimate confines of my subject
Some admiring friends have been kand
enough to saw that in fifteen minutes I
am able to hit ever point in it,
Pretty Girl Banquet Feature.
| Well done, can truly be said of the
arrangement committees work; well
done can each of the $50 persons pres
ont saw to himself for having attended
the banquet. Those unable to attend
were the losers.
| Pretty girls. snowy white napery
elaborte silver service and candelapra
rich and delicate cut glass. beautiful
carnations enhancing music and that
! avenue to the heart of man, an unsur-
passed menu served by the flower Of
Ottumwa's young womanhood were
some Of the things that contributed t.
make the banquet the browning sue
cess 1t was. Nothing was missing and
| all of the nobler senses We're gratihec
By the banauet's offering. A feast Of
reason and flow of soul. someone has
termed the banquet. but that of last
might was even more than that. Thf
lear, the eye, the taste, in fact this
senses were all satisfied by the oc-