New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1909-10-23

Il Pleasant Book About Them.
HOW TO BE HAPPY THOUGH CIVIL.
Book on Manners. BY Rev. .. 4.
hardy, N, A. 12mo, PIP. 319. Charles
scribner's Sons

HOW TO BE HAPPY THOUGH CIVIL.
a Book on Manners. BY Rev. p n
Staray, N A. 12mo, pp. 3l9. Charles
There could not be a pleasanter. wiser.
friendlier adviser in the ways of beau
hful behavior" than is Mr.. Hardy. His
teachings are golden; his illustrative an
eedotes are apt and amusing and are
tossed into the practical text with lavish
hand. How did our good British chan
lain happen TO write the book? He an
swers that question in his preface. There
ne tells US that when in China and Japan
he learned that much greater value is
attached to civility and manners in those
countries than in the West. His OBJ
servations led him to think Of book
IN which he should deal not with ETH
quette but with the principles which are
at the root of all good manners. "VVhat
/ mean by manners" he saws 'is much
what BHshidO stands for in Japan-the
instincts Of a gentleman, the PRINCIPLES
OF the gentle life" Good manners. he
declares, are always the same, whereas
the rules and etiquette are constantly
the lowest phase Of the matter. the
profitable results OF civility-not forget
ting 70 mention the Dean in Ireland
whose sarcastic manner prevented him
from being made bishop and the colo
NAL business men who found they were
losing custom because Of the bad man
ners Of their employees. 1t is not only
in the British colonies that this hap
pens
The author thinks that to-day there
is want Of reverence for everything
in heaven and earth, this lack being
most uncomfortably revealed i'll a rude
indifference to the feelings Of others,
especially elderly others. And here he
tells comical story about the Bishop
Of Norwich:
When passing pretty cottage which was
separated from the road by a hedge CheI
stopped to admire ii. "Oh please sir
said voice from the other side of the
This the bishop at once did Then. to his
surprise, instead Of the tiny child he had
expected. there stepped forth a girl big
enough TO have opened the gate for her
self. And why, my dear" said DR..
Sheepshanks, could you not open the gate
yourself?' Please. sir, because the
his hand showed the Bishop but too plain
y the truth of her statement.
For much Of the current bad manners
Mr.. Hardy blames the ''sick hurry OF
modern life. the restless rush that leaves
so many people without leisure or in
cllnation to give thoughtful cOnsidera-
tion 10 anybody. The Quaintest illus
tration OF the Chinese rule. taught In
schools. Let your movements be grace
full and deliberate" is the story Of the
mandarin who jumped a ditch in his
efforts 10 escape a heavy shower He
was greatly annoyed when he found
that boy had Witnessed the perform
ance, and he paid him largely to keep
secret the deed OF shame"
There is a note on that fearful Wild
fowl, the lady you take in TO dinner who
can not or will not say word. One au-
thor once found a cue for this unpleasant
behavior. he remarked to his compan-
ion Il do not mind being ugly, do your"
end this naturally brought the silent
one to speech Another little story re-
fers 10 Mr.. Hardy's well known book,
How To BE Happy Though Married"
a story which, OF course. deeply inter-
ested the author A feminine reader
put paper marks in ali the pages that
speak OF the duties of husbands to their
wives and left It on several occasions in
her husbands way. hoping that he would
be edited. Turning TO a. chapter ad-
dressed to wives. the husband found the
leaves uncut" Very bad manners there.
Mr. Hardy believes that finding fault is
sometimes eminenfly proper and desira-
BILE, but that 20 do it well IL "A fine art
lie cites the agreeable method OF John
Leech, who, when his children's faces
were distorted by naughty tempers.
sketched them deity ana let them see
how unattractive they were. We have
come upon an instance OF censure, po-
litely put. in which the pencil again
played z part An unhappy playgoer
unable 10 see the stage because Of the
large hat ia front of him made draw
~ ~ lie llnWlaIlIy headgear. wrote