The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1909-07-30
A Discord In A Flat
By Harle Oren Curnmins, S. B.
Copyright, by ]. B. Lippincott Coz

Mr.. H.-Don't talk such nonsense
I'll stop in for you when I'm ready
(He walks OUT
Mrs. M.-Now, tell me all about it.
dear.
Mrs. H. (picking up the pass, which
Mr.. H. has left behind, and handing
it to the Sympathetic Friend)-There
that's the cause of the whole trouble
You look it over while 1 fix my hair
and battle my eyes. But I'm not 60
ing out with him unless he explains
everything, and is nice about it.
Mrs. M. (reading) .-Who is Kitty
Mrs. H. (triumphantly).- That's just
what 1 wanted to know. First he told
me it was one of Held's chorus girls
then, when he saw how took it, he
tried to turn it off as a joke.
Mrs. MI don't believe it was a
joke, Edith. You know he did use to
carry on dreadfully before you mar
ried him.
Mrs. H. beginning to weep AGAIN.
He said he never knew any chorus
girls.
Mrs. M.-Why, the old hypocrite!
That's what his father took him out
of Harvard for. He used to chum
with Aldy Armand, whose uncle ran
the fremont street theater, and both
the boys were behind the scenes three
or four times week. Mr.. Armand
told Mrs. Spencer
Mrs. H. (hurriedly) Don't, Emily
I can't bear it. To think we've been
married only year and a half, and
Jack said tonight that he'd rather
have me go home than to have mother
come here.
Mrs. M. (sympathetically).-The
brute!
Mrs. H. (sobbing) .-N-no, Jack isn't
exactly bru-bru-brute, but he doesn't
understand wom-wom-women.
Mrs. MI wouldn't let my husband
say anything like that to me. Why
it's outrageous! i wonder what she
looks like? She's probably bleached
blonde.
Mrs. H. (hysterically).I know
what she'd look like if had her here
now, I'm not going with him tonight
anyway. Will you stay with me this
evening, Emily, and comfort me?
Mrs. M.-Of course 1 will, you poor
abused dear.
(The Highly Strung Woman rests
her head on the Sympathetic Friends
shoulder and weeps copiously. The
Average Man knocks lightly on the
door, and enters attired in dress
suit.
Mr.. H. (after an awkward pause)
We'll, Edith, have you come to your
senses yet?
Mrs. H.-N-no, and I'm not coming
to- mean, I'm not going to see any
of your old college friends.
Mr.. H. aside in great disgusD.-.
What foolishness! (Aloud): Come
dear, don't make such a spectacle of
yourself Your nose is getting all red
and blotched.
Mrs. NJ (under her breath)-What a
monster!
Mr.. H. Clearing the remark)-Mrs
Medlar (by name and disposition),
think perhaps 1 had better make an
explanation, since you have brought
this little misunderstanding of ours
to such a climax. 1t all began by
the wording of that pass, which l see
you have appropriated. Merely in
fun l said it was given to me by a GRO
rus girl l used to know. Now, com
mon sense ought to teach any woman
that if such had been the case ]
wouldn't have told my wife. The Kit
on that card is the abbreviation for
Frank Kitson, press representative for
the Hollis. You know him yourself
Mrs. Medlar, and you also know that
he and have been friends for years
Now, 1 don't want to be inhospitable
but think Edith and l can settle this
better if we are alone for a few min.
utes.
Mrs. M. (highly indignant)-Mr
Hornung, you will never have the op.
portunity of insulting me in this fiat
again. I will tell my husband what
you have said this very night. Good.
by, Edith, dear.
(The Sympathetic Friend stalks out
of the room. The Highly Strung
Woman throws her arms around the
Average Man in a moist but affection
ate embrace.)
Mrs. H.-You were right, dear, it
was all her fault. She stirred me up,
as she always does, and she is a med.
ding old thing. But you ought to
have told me in the first place that
Kit wasn't a Kitty. Oh heavens!
Catching sight of her face in the
glass; My nose is a sight Wait a
minute and I'll fix it. (She runs to
her chiffonniere and manipulates a
white, puffy thing for a few minutes,
then puts on her hat and comes back
to him. I'm all right now, Jackets.
Kiss me, and tell me where we're 60.