davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
HE DESCRIBES AN ELEPHANT HUNT

after with his fatal beauty and win
ming ways. CT We shall have more ne
gro women to bring back than animals
in cages.
Talk about your innocent negroes,
they will cheat you out of your boots.
Pa went of in the jungle to buy
animals of a negro king or some kind
of a nine spot. and he found the king
had in a corral half q dozen green
zebras. the usual yellow stripes being
the most beautiful green you ever saw
The king told Pa it was a rare species
only procured In a mountain fastness
hundreds of miles away, and Pa
bought the whole bunch at q fabulous
price. and brought them to camp. Mr..
Hagenbach was tickled to death at
the rare animals, and praised Pa, and
said there was a fortune in the green
and black striped zebras. l thought
there was something wrong when
heard one of those zebras bray like q
mule when he was eating hay, but it
wasn't my put In, and l didn't say
anything.
That night there was the greatest
rain We have had since we came here,
and in the morning the green and
black striped zebras hadn't stripe on
them. and they proved to be nothing
but wild asses and assesses. white
and dirty, and all around the corral
the water standing on the ground was
cOlored green and black.
Mr.. Hagenbach took Pa out to the
corral and pointed to the wild white
mules and said, What do you think
of your green zebras nOw?" Pa looked
them over and said: Say. that negro
king is nothing but a Pullman porter,
and he painted those mules and sawed
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
JOY WORK
And the Other Kind.

Did you ever stand on prominent
corner at an early morning hour and
watch the throngs Of people on their
way to work? Noting the number who
were forcing themselves along be-
cause it meant their daily bread. and
the others cheerfully and eagerly pur-
suing their way because of love OF
their work.
1t is fact that ones food has much
to do with it, As an example:
II an engine has poor oil. or boiler
is fired with poor coal. bad result is
certain. isn't it?
Treating your stomach right is the
keystone that sustains the arch of
health's temple and you will find
"Grape-Nu as a daily food is the
most nourishins and beneficial you can
use
We have thousands of testimonials,
real genuine little heart throbs. from
people who simply tried Grape-Nuts
out of curiosity-as n last resort-with
the result that prompted the testir'o-
NAL
II you have never tried Grape-Nuts
It's worth while 10 give it a fair impair
tial trial. Remember there are mil
lions eating Grape-Nuts every day
they know. and We know if you will
use Grape-Nuts every morning your
work is more likely to be joy-work. be-
cause you can keep well. and with the
brain well nourished work is . joy.
Read the '.H0ad to Wellville" in every
package-"Thsre's a Reason"
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

wives went off and left Pa ard the
Young wife alone. and they called the
husband to put a stop to It.
Well, l never saw a giant negro so
mad as that husband was when he
came into the tent and saw Pa. aad
the woman had a fit when she saw her
husband with baseball club with
spikes on it. He took his wife by the
neck and threw her out of the tent.
and then closed the tent and he and
Pa were alone, and fer an hour no
one knew what happened, but when
Pa came back to our camp. WORLDLY in
the legs. and with not much clothes
On, We knew the worst had happened
Pa tcld Mr.. Hagenbach that The
negro acted like q human being He
cried and told Pa lie had broken into
his family circle and picked the fairest
flower broken his heart and left him
an irresponsible and broken man. the
laughing stock OF his friends. and
nothing but Pas life or his money
could settle it.
Pa offered to give up his life but
the injured husband had rather have
the money, and after an hour Pa COM
promised by giving him SIG and his
coat, pants and shirt. and Pa is to
have the wife in the bargain Pa
didn't want to take the wife. bur the
husband insisted on it. and Mr.. Hagen
bach says We can take her to America
and put her into the show AS an I'M
tanned Zulu, or missing link. but he
insists that pa shall be careful here
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
FOR rllEH@STESS|
Birthday DDDer, Described by Nne. Nsrr,
Sure to BE fAost Enjoyable went
-EDtertaiDn7eDt Suggestions.

A birthday dinner which is to be
given next week is SO charming in its
appointments I can hardly wait to
tell about it for the benefit Of others
who may claim the first month in the
year for their natal day. l used to
think that winter functions were not
halt so pretty as summer ones. but Of
late It seems as IL nothing could be
more suggestive of hospitality than a
room warm with red and green deco
rations, quantities of candles and a
blazing fire in an open fireplace. with
out which no up-to-date house is COM
plete.
To return to our dinner: The table
cloth is of cluny lace to be laid over
red silk, with q huge cake for the
center piece. surrounded by a wreath
Of red candles and red carnations,
which do not fade as quickly as roses.
The mantelpiece is to be banked
with poinsettias. and a novel as well
as decorative feature will be the in
dividual and relish dishes. all to be Of
red Bohemian glass. The place cards
are to have the verse for January writ.
ten in red ink and they are to be deco
rated with red beads in lieu of gar
nets.
The gift for the birthday girl is to
be a handsome garnet ring set in sill
yer. which will be presented on a ring
holder of red Bohemian glass The
maid is to bring it in on tray when
the dessert is served.
There are to be eight guests, all
college chums. After the dinner there
will be a theater party. chaperoned by
the birthday girls mother. Afterward
there is to be a chatting dish supper.
with a delicious welsh rarebit. Each
girl is to ask her best boy friend to
this. It all sounds exciting. but as
this mother said to me: You just
have to let them do things. so you
just might as we'll be in touch with
it all. 1t pays in the end to keep pref
ty close to your daughter"
Isn't she a wise woman? Would
there were more like her. She is the
same one who always sits up to wei
come her daughter home. no matter
how late the hour, and she is bright
and interested. too. And, what is
more. her first question is: What
time is it?''
There is whole sermon right there.
Ponder it We who have young daughters
Just entering into the joys of social
life.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
cutieura's Efficacy Clearly Proven.

when about two and a half years
old my daughter broke out ON her hips
and the upper parts Of her legs with
very irritating and painful eruption 1t
began in October; the first / noticed
was little red surface and a constant
desire on her part to scratch her limbs.
She could not sleep and the eruptions
got sore, and yellow water came out
OF them. had two doctors treat her,
but she grew worse under their treat
ment. Then l bought the Cuticura
Remedies and only used them two
weeks when she was entirely we'll
This was in February. She has never
had another rough place on her skin.
and she is now fourteen years old.
Mrs. r. r. Whitaker, Winchester,
Tenn, Sept. %. 1905"
Potter Drug i Chem. Corp, Soc Props, Boston
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
A Curiinq Fluid.

Since IT is the fashionable thing TO
wear the hair in large waves at all
times, women have hunted in vain for
good curling fluids that will take the
place of the Marcel iron.
So far. no one has found formula
that is infallible. but the following one
has been tried with good success. II
is not simple. and, therefore. the ma
jority may not care to indulge in il.
Ii is made of five-eighths of dram
of carbonate of potash. half Il dram OF
ammonia water. two drains OF extract
of violet. an ounce of giycerin. three
quarters OF an ounce of rectiiied spirits
and half pint of water.
The mixture stands bottled for ten
days and is then strained. To use. the
hair is moistened and tied down in
large waves. which are combed out as
soon as it Observation-Disclosures Ledger.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

|. We thought when We came to
Africa we would be near TO nature,
where the natives were simple and
honest. but Pa has found that the al
most naked negroes can give the white
men cards and spades and little casino
| and then beat them at the game.
Pa has been blacknailed and scared
out of his boots and lot Of money.
by an injured husband. as natural as
he could have been Unframed in
New York.
We noticed that Pa was quite inter
ested in likely negro woman. one OF
20 wives Of a heather. 10 the extent
of having her wash his shirts. and he
would linger at the tent Of the hus-
band and teach the woman some
words of English, such As. You bet
you.slife." and mot en- your life. and
a few cuss words which she seemed to
enjoy repeating.
She was a real nice looking niger,
and smiled on va to beat the band,
but that was all. OF course she en-
joyed having Pa call on her. and evi.
IDENTIFY showed her interest in him. but
that seemed only natural as Pa is
nice. clean white man with clothes on
and she looked upon him as a sort Of
king. until the other wives became
jealous. and they filed the husband
up with stories about Pa and the
young negress, but Pa was as innocent
as could be. Where ~ made the mis-
taxe was in taking EOld OF her hand
and looking at the lines in her palm.
to read her future by the lines in
her hand, and as Pa is some near
sighted he had to bend over her hand
and then she stroked Pas bald head
with the other hand. and the Other
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

Professor MunyoE has Just issued a
most beautiful. useful and complete Al
manac; it contains not only all the scien-
tific information concerning the moons
phases, in all the ATTITUDES. but has il
Illustrated articles on how to read char
acter by phreno!ogy palmistry and
birth month. 1t also tells all about
card reading. birth stones and their
meaning, and gives the Interpretation
of dreams. 1t teaches beauty culture,
manicuring, gives weights and meas
ures, and antidoteS for poison. In fact,
& is a Magazine Almanac. that not
only gives valuable information. but
will afford much amusement for every
member Of the family. especially for
parties and evening entertainments
Farmers and people in the rural dis.
tricts will find this Almanac almost
Invaluable
1t will be sent to anyone absolutely
free on application to the MUNYON
REMEDY COMPANY. PHILADELr
PHIA.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Ready Theme.

Archibald" called the wife Of the
special writer, in excited tones.
. Don't bother me, Lucy" shouted
her husband from his den"
Archibald" she persisted.
Please keep quiet. Didn't 1 tell
you not to bother me when am
busy"
But 1 must, dear. The children
have taken those six bottles of gold
paint you bIrgtt for the gas fixtures
and sInearad il On the walls from gar
ret TO cellar"
That so. Lucy? Well. don't let that
worry you. III just call it an inspira-
ton and use il in an article entitled
How Children Brighten Up :hs
House."
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

f!NpqYHJjE!

Many of the designs recall the old
polOnaise of 1860.
Faded colOrs are more in evidence
than the distinct shades.
Paris is smiling at present upon
metalized gold and silver net.
A color known as kingfsher is be-
ing shown in the various shades.
Gold and silver lace is being used
for yokes instead of tulle and net.
Sleeves are never worn on ball
gowns nowadays except for the merest
apology.
Ribbons are playing foremost part
in the construction of the new evening
gowns.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Interesting 70 erides.Eieet.

Interesting to Brides-Eleet.
This is an incient verselet that may
help a bride to be to decide upon the,
month in which to launch her ship
upon the matrimonial sea:
Married In January's hoar and rime.
Widowed you'll be before your prime.
Married in February's sleety weather.
Life you'll tread in tune together.
Married when March winds shrill and
roar.
Your home will be on a foreign shore.
Married meath Aprirs changeful skies.
A checkered path before you lies.
Married when bees Ger May blooms fit,
Strangers around your board will sit
Married in month of rOSeS-June-
Life will be one long honeymoon.
Married in July, with flowers ablaZe.
R;tter-sweet memories in after days.
Married in Augustus heat and browse.
Lover and friend in your chosen spouse.
Married in golden September's glow.
Smooth and serene your life will flow.
Married when leaves in October thin,
Toll and hardship for you begin.
Married in wells Of November mist.
Dame Fortune your wedding ring has
kissed.
Married in days of DEFENDERS cheer.
Loves star burns brighter from year to
year.
MADAME MERRI.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Uncertainty in Pi.tsburg.

It was Christmas eve in Pittsburs
The snow spanked in the tin roofs,
Far away could be seen the rubicund
glow OF the coke ovens
All was quiet in the home of the
Pittsburg official
Suddenly low tap resounded on the
outer door
"Hark. George" said the officials
wife Did you hear that? IL may be
Santa Claus"
1T may be Santa Claus said the
official. gloomily. but Ill bet 81 it's
a deputy sheriff."
And he arose AID put Oh his shoes.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

A peculiar custom obtains in the
Twelfth Lancers-the playing of the
Vesper Hymn, the Spanish Chant, and
the Russian National Hymn every
night Of the year after the Last
Post" has sounded. 1t is said that the
playing of the Vesper Hymn orig
mated in one of the officers wives pre-
senting the regiment with a new set
of instruments on condition that the
hyn Il was played every night after the
Last Post" The playing of the
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

ates. From this it would seem that
badness" to the vices involved in in
temperance and other forms of sensual
dissipation, but, since convicts are
guilty of many things apart from
these, as theft, burglary, forgery and
the like. holds that they are led TO
the preparation of even this class Of
crimes by a defective bodily state.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Relation of Body and Mind

son who is healthy can be wholly bad.
The clergyman further expressed the
conviction that there is close con-
nection between health and morals.
and that the man who has reached
middle age in a sound bodily condition
thereby proves that he has led a de-
cent life. In support of his position
he advanced the assertion that a
large proportion of the convicts in
English prison are physical degener-
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

aches. and q feeling Of languor. Part
Of the time I could not attend to my
work and irregularity Of the kidney
secretions was annoying. Deans Kid
ney Pills brought me prompt relief"
Sold by all dealers. Soc a box. Fos-
ter-Milburn Co, Buffalo. N. Y.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

on the game, and all of q sudden she
came.t to q point and held up one foot.
and her eyes stuck out. and Pa said
the game was near. and he told her
to charge down." and we went on to
surround the elephant. Pa was ahead
and he saw baby elephant not big
ger than Shetland pony, looking
scared. and Pa made a lunge and fell
on top of the little elephant which
began to make 2 noise like q baby that
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Manias Are Epidemics.

ManiaS and decisions are mental
phenomena, but they are social They
are diseases of the mind. but they are
epidemic. They are contagious. not
as cholera is contagious. but contact
to others is essential to them They
are mass phenOmena.-Prof. w. G..
Sumner. in ''Folkways.'
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Editorial Verdict.

From a serious-minded jester the
editor received this note. together
with consignment OF hunor that was
heavy enough to so by freight,
Dear Sir: read all these jokes to
my wife. ard she laughed heartily.
Now, have it on good authority that
when a mans wife vii. laugh at his
foxes they are bound TO be very good
-or she is. Yours, etc"
The editor slipped them into the re-
turn envelope with the letter, after
writing on the margin: She is"
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

for short people. appear to add to the
length of the person, while any gay
light colors made the figure look just
the reverse; indeed. they too often
make a woman look both short and
stout. and this also applies to broad
dress trimmings
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Assertion Made That No Healthy Pei
son Is Wholly Bad.

The close relation of body and mind
in the matter of physical health. Of
which SO much is said by various re-
ligious and semi-religious organiza
tons and by class of professional
'healers." is considered from fresh
point of view by an English clergy.
man. His argument is that no per-
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
English Regimental Customs.

Spanish Chant is declared to be a
penance for the sacking of a convent
during the Peninsular war. No reason
is assigned for the playing of the Rus
sian National Anthem.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

suffering from back
ache and other COM
mon durable kidney
ills. II you suffer so.
profit by this wOm-
ans example: Mrs.
Martin Douglass. 50
Cedar St. Kingston.
N. T., says: Il had q
lame. aching back.
diZZV smells head
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Not Worried.

Doesn't it make you nervous to
have your son play football?"
"Oh. no. l don't mind it a bit. He
is only my stepson, you know."-C ii.
cago Record-Herald.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
IL Certainly Is.

"You shouldn't cast Your pearls be
fore swine"
.g kn0s =; but it's hard telling who
&k .he Log these days."
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
SKIN ERUPTION CURED.

Was So Sore, Irritating and Painful
That Little Sufferer Could Not Sleep
Scratched Constantly.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
HIS FATE.

Mr.. Dude-I was thinking how much
I resemble your carpet-always at
your feet, you know.
Miss Sly-Yes. very much like my
carpet. I'm going to shake 1t soon.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
Eeintin0,

|, Statistics-Of the 1.OOl young wom-
en- who tainted last year 9S7 fell into
the arms of men. two fell CT the floor
and one into a water butt-Life
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
ONE THING ct A TIME.

Have you noticed that the baroness
never talks about other women"
How could she? She is al, the
time talking about herself"
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

New Works Growth in Century.
New York city has added 100000
to its population in the last century.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
A Guessing Contest.

l hope that the readers who have
requested new guessing contests will
appreciate this issue of the depart
ment. for there has been a special ef-
fort made to get together as many
new games as possible. The answers
to the following all end in ''ure," and
they are all words in common use:
Where are cows kept ......... Pasture
The mother of US all. Nature
What students love. Literature
To what many aspire. Culture
A name applied to an animal. Creature
What We should lay up in heaven:...
Observation-Disclosures. Treasure
OF what We 90 not have enough. Leisure
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27
OFTEN THE CASE.
Women Struggle HopeIessly Along,
Suffering saekaehe, Dizzy Spells,
lanQuos, Etc.

Women have so much to go through
In life that it's pity there Is so much
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

This metal fe with probably the popular
gold
mounted in of thin gold fet which fits neatly
head.
The Columbus journal., 1909-01-27

European Cities.
This contest was used to liven up
things before the regular game OF
cards in which the club INDUCES once
a week. The cards were foreign DOS,
tails with thick white paper pasted
over the address side. on which tho
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1909-03-20
strenuth Of a Whale.

An anecdote illustrating the great
strength Of the whale is told us by an
eyewitness, Sidney King, who says
that while at Grand Manan last week
he saw a large specimen swimming
about at Seal Cove. near the mooring
at that place.
The large sardine boat Ouida, owned
by William Russell and Grover Cook,
was tied up for the winter with a six,
inch and a four-inch bride to the
mooring. In playing about the vessel,
which is of some IA tons burden, the
sea monster either accidentally or by
way Of sport took the two large ropes
in his mouth and started to swim to
bottom. The vessel heeled over and
took in water, the checks were torn
completely off her deck, and finally
both ropes were parted by the terrific
strain, setting the vessel adrift.
She was tied up again without dam.
age, but it shows what a whale could
do If he was really ADMINISTRATION
nebec Journal.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1909-03-20
HIS ERRAND IN CANDY STORE.
Absent-Minded Man at Last Discovered
What He Wanted.

"Let me see now" mHsed the alb
sent-minded man as he stood at the
counter in the candy store with a far
away look in his eyes. What was it
| came in here for?"
WAS it a tack hammer asked the
young woman who had come forward
to take his order, with a sly wink at
the other clerks.
mo, it wasn't that" he said.
"or a pumpkin pie? she suggested.
mo"
Maybe it was a Dound of tea or a
ton of coal?"
mo. I'm sure It wasn't those. You
see, l had a list of things my wife
wanted me to get, but / have careless
ly lost 1t. What was it now that | came
In here for?'
How about a lawn mower?'
mo; l bought one yesterday"
"Or a mustard plaster?'
mo"
"or a bottle of ink?"
NO"
Gould it be possible that you came
in here for some candy?"
"Ah! that's it-that's it," he glee.
fully exclaimed. Yes, | want two
pounds of chocolate creams, and |
thank you very much for helping me
out"
And the absent minded heaved a
sigh of relief as he went on his way
with the purchase.-A. B. Lewis, in
Bohemian.
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1909-03-20
Mas. IusTwgD,s Lii ERRoR.
Just Why the Almond souffle Did Not
Taste Right.

Il have cooked a little surprise for
you, dear" said young Mrs. Justwed.
an almond soufle for after dinner.
got the recipe from that new cookery
book that came as a wedding present,
and the instructions are most clear,
Handy, isn't it, a book like that? I'm
sure the thing viii turn out a success
Arthur smiled in a dubious sort of
way, and temporized about the success
as he looked at the soufie.
Cant say | like it, he said after
the first mouthful. Sure you got the
instructions right, darling? II tastes
very funny"
"Oh, yesi" responded Eleanor, with
tears in her eyes. Il can say them by
heart from the book. Just hear me-"
And she reached down the volume.
Take half pound of grated al
monds-"
Quite right" interrupted Arthur,
following with his fnegr.
"One pound of astor sugar; mix well
with white of three fresh eggs"
Correct" said her spouse. as she
continued breathlessly:
add two ounces of white pepper
Pepper! Great goodness" said the
unhappy man as he turned over the
leaf.
Two large carrots chopped into
dice, a spoonful of mustard, four
chopped onions, and"
Stop Stop! You must be wrong,
I'm sure. Why. my dear, l thought so.
You are muddling up almond soufie
with Irish stew. You've forgotten to cut
the leaves of this blessed cookery
book"
The Lexington intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1901-1949, 1909-03-20
PRERoeATlvg oF THE MAYOR
Only One Beaver" Hat Could Be
Worn in His 5ailiwiek.

HIS beaver hat, which Hub had as
sumed on the day that he took Office,
and which he never laid by until he
left public life, was his glory and
crown. He wore it usually with q
shorttailed coat; he has been known
to wear it with a flannel shirt. Ons
day an amateur minstrel show came
up from Columbia, and one OF the
minstrels swelled about town in a
beaver. l stop to explain about
beaver" The ehete north would call
it a top" or 'tall' hat; the uncultured
west would call it a plug" but South
Caroline sticks to the termlnology of
ante-bellum days.
The youth in the beaver hat was
surprised that morning when a po-
iiceman arrested him.
Whist for he asked.
THE mayor knows, responded the
policeman, and the minstrel was
dragged before Hub.
"Prisonah at the bah" said Hub.
"yo'-all stands charged with a grave
crime. Wheah did yo' git that hat?"
Bought it, falteredy the prisoner.
Hub grabbed up his own beaver
from the bar, threw It on the floor.
stamped on it and tore of the brim.
Only one beavah hat allowed in
this town, subj said he, AN | with
draws like a gentleman for the guest
of the day. An now wen adjourn up
stairs .'-Collier's Weekly,