The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1909-01-23


felt an aching void and have filled 1t
and will hereafter supply all the com
motion this town can stand. Hence,
alas, it is only too clear that there is
no further use for Commotion Com
mittee."
YES" yawned the Secretary" the
City Fathers have gone step too far
but the Mayor has gone step-fath-
err"
oh, you're out. of the limelight since
the Mayor got real Secretary, said
the Careless Kicker.
We'll, I'm interested in the fauna
of the Mayors office, any way, and it
is pleasant to see a tall and state y
Fern fourishing by the country
Rhodes side,' replied the Secretary,
lodging an inkstand.
Il see one of the papers remarks
that Supervisor Aylett is holding down
two jobs" insinuated the Chronic
Critic
That's nothing" said the Warty
Wit, why shouldn't he They all do.
Logan in addition to being Supervisor
is a newspaperman and a kamaaina;
Quinn, besides Supervising, drives a
Pullman Palace devil-wagon, McClei-
Ian, over and above being the strategic
Democratic minority of the Board is
one of the king rivets of the Honolulu
Iron Works. Cox, beyond his alder
manic duties, is a capitalist, and the
other members of the board, in spite
of serving the City and County, are en-
gagged in some kind of honest TOLL
"Well, l suppose it's all right ad-
mitted the Chronic Critic, for even
legislators, besides serving the public,
are allowed to earn their livings."
Are you going to the Elks' Min
strels?" asked the Queer Fellow, adj
dressing the Flirtatious Flame.
"Cawn't say, we know. Deuced
awkward, bah jove, so many blawsted
functions these days, and they all want
meh, We know! Now there's Bobbie
Burns blow out tonight; then there's
the dear Kiser's birthday on Wednes-
day; and it is Chinese New Years;
and, damme, Mr.. Lincoln's centenniars
approaching, and the Floral Parade,
and no end of doings."
"Oh, you mustn't miss the Elks!
Little Eddie Douthitt is going to do a
peach of stunt"
WEAKLY"
You betcher And the Elks' show
will have all your other functions roll
ed into one and duplicated"
when does Roosevelt start on his
South African trip?' asked the Hoary
Historian.
LAS soon after he quits his job as
the moving-picture men, reporters, ma
ture. takers, and photograph mono
polists are ready to embark" replied
the Silly Cynic.
why don't he come to Hawaii?
Judge Kingsbury would entertain him. "
mot enough big game"
Not, Ell! What's the matter with
the Elks?"
"Oh, they're not Wild"
Then Hawaiis noted for her dears. -
Yes, but they're domesticated."
whats the matter with the blind
pigs?"
Its the close season for such. Che
| fas the only big game here, and that's
hard to catch.'
oh well, if we can't get Roosevelt,
we still have Jimmy Morgan, Bonnie
Berger, Cohen, Fern and-and, and
Chester Doyle. They're enough sire
nuosity for this burg"
"And if we can't have big-game
hunters and big-stick wielders Of the
White House brand, we can at least
depend on walking races, Supervisorial
sensations, Aala baseball, amateur
theatricals, higher meat rates, Jill jim
goism, 'Tiser-Bulletin squabbling
luaus and scenery"
Xxx
| wish to register an humble opinion
that there is going to be a revival OF
the Japanese war scare. There is some
thing the matter still, say what the di-
plomats may, and it is going to be hard
to prevent pililSia President Roose'
welt, never specially celebrated for dis
erection, is hardly helping matters when
he allows himself to be quoted as much
perturbed over the California legisla-
Istive agitation against the Japanese
The agitation, as matter of fact
shows that immigration was certain
ly not stopped any too soon. 1t is
fact that some very fertile sections Of
California have been taken over by
Japanese colonies and not all the
treaties or protestations of friendship
i'm the wnrld cnn etnn the citiZens O