Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-08-27
ON@~NNNNNNN

He's a nice chap TO take a girl
fishing, must say" why, what did
he do?" He hshed louisville
Courier-Journal
Did she refuse him?" Practically;
she said she would not marry him
TN he arrived at years OF discretion
Brooklyn Life.
| Father-And so your teacher is
! dead Sonny-W What's the good OF
| that while the school is still there?-
Meggendorfer Blatter.
What sort of chap is he?" Well.
les one of these fellows who think
nat anything mean is joke if 1t
sn't on him. Cleveland Leader.
He-Love me and the world is
nine, She-How do you make that
out? He-Why. aren't you all the
world to Baltimore American.
MIR, Rocks Ito chauffeur who has
lost control of machine) Can you
stop her? Chauffeur-No. Mr. Rocks
Well, then, run her into something
cheap.
Redd-Have you ever timed your
automobile? Gresne-Oh, yes. 1t
stood perfectly still for forty-eight
minutes on the road to-day!-Yonkers
Statesman
Helen-Ruth was afraid the girls
wouldn't notice her engagement ring,
Grace Did they7 Helen-Did they?
Six of them recognized 1t at once
Evening Lamp.
Sir. want to marry your
daughter Go slow, young man. go
slow. When l was your age wanted
just as badly to marry her mother"
$685. Baltimore American.
The Heiress-Do you think that
| more tall men marry than short ones7
The Hunter think men who are
short are the ones who marry most
| frequently Town Topics
Mary-Fm positive Fred loves me
and intends to make me his Wife.
Helen-Why? Has he proposed YETI
| Mary-No But he dislikes mother
more every time he sees her
Jugend
Magistrate You say you want
| divorce because your married life is
one long series OF fights You don't
look 1t. Would-Be Divorce No, your
honor; but you ought TO see my wife.
Circle
Conductor ton railroad train) --
This isn't the right ticket, sir. Alb
sent-Minded Passenger What's the
matter with 1t? Conductor-This
ticket calls for diamond ring.
Philadelphia Bulletin.
She She told me you told her that
secret told you not TO tell her. He
The mean thing! | told her not to
tell you | told her She-I promised
her 1 wouldn't tell you abe told me,
so don't tell her / told you Boston
| Herald
Miss Coopah-Why, NAB Ian, II dere
aint Pete Broker! Whar he git dem
cloe's? Miss Sinclalr-S-s-s-s-h. o.
course. dere ain no tellin', but for de
las two weeks Pete's done bin de night
Waterman in big gents clothin'
store.--Puck.
Mrs Crawford You say 1t is i'm
possible to get any money out OF your
husband Have you gone about 1t in
the right way7 Mrs. BRADSHAW
I'VE tried everything, my dear. except
sending him Black Hand letter.
Brooklyn Life.
| MIR. Slimpsure latter a decided re-
| fusai)--I know what the matter is.
| II is because I'm poor. You would
marry me If / were rich. Miss Gallie
| (thoughtfully) Perhaps so; but you
would have TO be very, very rich!--
New York Weekly.
I'm sure | don't know why they
call this hotel The Palms. DO you?
| I've never seen a palm anywhere near
| the place" You'll see them before
you 90 It's a pleasant little surprise
the walters keep for the guests on the
| last day of their stay"-Puc
| ALAS :" confessed the penitent man,
in "A moment of weakness ! stole a
carload Of brass fittings" I'm mo-
ment Of weaknessY exclaimed the
Judge Goodness, man! what would
you have taken II you had yielded in
moment when you felt strongT'-
Boston Globe.
| A small boy was hoeing corn in
sterile field by the roadside when a
passerby stopped and said: Pears
/ to me your corn is rather small"
Certainly" said the boy. "Its dwarf
corn" But 1t looks yaller." Ger
hainly We planted the yaller kind"
but 1t looks as II you wouldn't get
| more than half crop" "Of course
not" said the boy we planted her
bn shares - Detroit News.Tribune.
Justice Brewer says that it Is usu,
ally an easy matter to pick out the
truth among Il lot Of conflicting evil
lence. BY way Of Illustration he tells
;he following incident, which took