davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago News.I

TFrom the Chicago News.l
People are sometimes KILLED by
kindness'-in books.
Charity is a cloak sometimes used
to cover an amateur concert.
How did poor Eve manage to get
along without complexion lotions?
Some women use a gallon of words
to express teaspoonful of thought.
When 1t comes to being charitable.
most of us have wonderful self con-
troll.
The income tax is popular with the
majority because it only hits the
minority.
And many a man does his growing
at home because he is afraid to growl
anywhere else.
Some people would be able to ac-
ouire a lot of knowledge If they didn't
think they knew 1t all.
Nothing annoys the average woman
more than to have a clerk try to hurry
her along when she is shopping.
The dictionary doesn't say anything
about the mother of ten children being
a heroine, but that's just what she in.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
To try him on a charge.
OF being rightfully at large.
GOVERNMENT BY COMMISSION.

Des Moines' success with the COM
mission form of government is get
ting to be an old story. That's why it
is such a good one to tell over and
over again. 1t ought to be particularly
interesting to Topekans because of
the fact that they will be going to
the polls before long to decide by
their votes whether or not this city
shall undertake to conduct its affairs
under this method of modern NUM-
cipal rule; and especially when it is
told in such a concise and forcible
way as it is in an editorial in The
Worlds Work for September. as fol-
lows:
More than a year ago the citizens
of Des Moines. headed by a group of
young business men, retired the pro-
fessional politicians from their city
government and placed all the power
in the hands of five men, along with
a corresponding responsibility. This
is city government by an elected com
mission-the Galveston plan. One of
these men had been twice elected
mayor under the old regime; the sec
ond had made a good record in the
office of assessor; the third was a
journeyman painter; the fourth had
been a coal miner and deputy
sheriff. The fifth, the mayor had
been a real estate man and a police
judge
Instead of all five being made re-
sponsible for all departments of gov
eminent. the city's work was divided
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

1t will have to boost Tom McNeaI and
the Stubs crowd in general And so
to help either of the contestants for
congress il the coming struggle would
be bitter pill. On this question at
the present time The Post is giving a
good imitation of a cat walking a high
tight wire. All of this goes to show
that the newspaper which digs deep
into partisan and personal politics has
a row to hoe that makes it difficult to
maintain it's equilibrium at all times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Times have changed among White
House visitors" How SOP 81 just
saw cowpuncher elbowed aside by a
man in golf clothes. "-Philadelphia
Bulletin.
Here is a little present for you-a
superb $4,000 necklace" "Ohl Hcw
nice of your that will let you have
for Ell, 600."-Ideas.
All Hand Work-Squire (who has
just had his wife's portrait painted
Wen; Thomas. what do you think Of
1t? Thomas-It's a brave pictur bean't
1t sure 'nough. Be 1t all done by and,
zur?-The Taller.
What did you say last night when
Jack asked you to marry him?" Il
shook my head" sideways or up and
down Boston Transcript.
Friend-I suppose you will be writing
lot of jokes on these bathing suits
Professional Humorist-I couldn't on
most of them; there isn't room.-Judge.
Knicker-Has Jones anything for a
rainy day? BOcker-Yes, he has saved
a friend to borrow an umbrella from
New York Times.
Il wish understood all the new pro-
visions of the tariff BILL" sighed Mrs
Gotrox. "Why?" asked her husband.
Because when l go to Europe I'd lilo
to know just what trinkets II will be
worth my while to smuggle in."-De-
troit Free Press.
That's a mighty interesting woman
was just talking to yonder." 1T never
noticed it," You know her, then?''
She's my wife."-Houston Post
Tramp Gin the country)-Yes, 1 once
rode bike, but 1 had to give it up.
Cyclist-Why? Tramp-Well, yer sea
the owner was coming down the road
behind me, and the policeman had n
rope stretched across in front.-New
York Tribune.
I'm going to- be married next week,
old man. Congratulate me-" well, I
didn't know you were engaged" II
wasn't till somebody told me where a
young couple could get a fine cook
cheap. And hated to miss the op-
portunity. "-Cleveland Leader.
Have you got any Georgia patent
currycombs?' asked Farmer FishbaoK
of Billville merchant the other day
II don't know" replied the storekeep-
i've got several kinds. What sort Is
the Georgia patent?'' TITS made W tn
scallops so it will fit in between a
mules ribs this time of the year.
Atlanta Constitution.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
FROM OTHER PENS
A BLOW TO SOCIALISM.

The theory of socialism as applied
in practice has received a signal re-
buff in New Zealand. The purpose
there was to have the government
provide work for all wages arnerS
who could not find private employ
ment. Accordingly, the state has hir-
ed surplus labor in building govern
ment railways, opening and farm
ing public lands and in other public
works. But in the meantime the pub
lie revenues have decreased and the
funds available for the distribution of
wages have dropped this year from
$12,OO0,00O to 100000. Simultan-
eously the funds at hand for all other
departments of the insular govern
ment have decreased. The situation
has become such that one-seventh Of
the population 70 New Zealand is de-
pendent upon the state for work.
Hence suddenly it has become pre-
eminent1y a land of the unemployed
Perhaps it is not surprising that
the remedy proposed for this collapse
of socialism is that it be bolstered by
more socialism. That would be a po-
litical application of homeopathy to
the state that fares i'll. 1t is now pro-
posed that the government shall in
sure against unemployment; in other
words, that it shall provide pension
for those out of work Tt may be asr
sumed that this is the deliberately
chosen policy of the government. since
the plan is advocated by the minister
of finance.-WaShing tOn Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
[From the New York Press.I

Man writes the marriage certihcato;
woman keeps the ink from fading.
A man feels he is a martyr about his
big family because his wife has TIE
care of it.
A woman proves how loyal she Is to
a man by pretending to believe he is
loyal to her.
A girl is awful lucky to be so pretty
she doesn't need to think she is more
so but she will.
Fifty is a milestone on a woman's
road that can back away from her
faster than she can catch up with A.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

There really won't be anything re-
nzrkable about that trip which Presi-
dent Taft is about to take around I'm
Gle Sans domain and concerning which
SO much is being said these days. This
is for the very good reason that not a
single point in Kansas is on his timer
rrv
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

President Taft does not deserve that
loaf OF bread made of the finest flour
E1at has been ground from the best
wheat raised in Kansas this year, be-
cause he has failed to put this state
On his calling list during that 1900
mile trip he is about to take. But
he'll be getting the real thing in the
way of bread. all right, all right.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

The recent rains. which were pretty
general throughout the state, were a
4rifle late to help out the corn crop but
they have put the ground in excel
lent condition for fall blowing and
wheat sowing. Advantage of this
should be taken by the farmers. They
elfould increase their wheat acreage
considerably and lay the foundation for
a wheat crop next year that will beat
a1l records.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Sir Thomas Upton announces that
he is going to challenge again for the
HAmerioa's cup, the races to occur in
1910. A friendly tip to Sir Tom would
he in the nature of an admonition that
he is merely paving the way for the
wasting of a lot Of money. Perhaps,
though, he feels that the wares he
trades in and the Upton name are in
need of a little more advertising.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Calling attention to the fact that
government experts estimate that
there is enough coal in the United
States to last 1910 years. the New
York Evening Mail says that "orders
for delivery after the expiration of that
period are rejected by all responsible
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Peary is ''the only logical candidate
Cor polar honors." according to his
friends. This may be quite true enough
but it has been a common experience
gince the world began that in most of
hhe big contests of any and every sort
At has usually been the dark horse
that has won out.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
snnirrels as GIuttons.

I once came upon several squirrels
in a wood feasting on the fragments
eorged themselves so much that I
could easily have caught them as they
Topped up the trees nearest They
looked as though they had been finish
ing the dregs of the beer bottles, as
well as eating the cakes and other
things.-Scotsmap
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

The Philadelphia Inquirer has dis
covered the real answer to the old, old
question, what is an optimist?" The
Inquirer says: IAN optimist Is one
who believes everything said by both
Cook and Peary."
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

It's a good thing that the astrono-
,mers are not compelled or asked to
prove the things they find out about
the moon, the stars and other planets.
That is, it's a good thing for their
aoe7ee of mind
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

II occurs to the Atlanta Constitution
af1at whether the world runs to aero
planes or automobiles, Standard Oil
.etdn wins Sure, Mike.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Mayor Green IS going to see if some
steps cannot be taken to compel the
street railway company to keep it's
right Of way free from unsightly
growths of weeds and grass. And this
demand is a most reasonable one.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

"rt would be invidious." thinks the
New York World, ''to intimate that
the Georgia mob which aided an
clipping couple to escape their pursueys
gave an exhibition of sentimental
lynch law Maybe not
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Nothing like race suicide prevails in
Ehawnee county. The school census
Mnumerators have found 1890 children
az school age in its confines and the
chances are they overlooked a few.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

To the head Of the class for the Chi
caEo News. It refers to Peary's trip
as his ~anabasis."
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

when upon thy frame the law
Places its majestic paw,
Tho in innocence or guilt,
Thou art then required to wilt"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
A BANKRUPT POET.

Judging from a dispatch from Lon
don the modern poet is but little bet
ter off than his predecessor of the
early days when devotees of the muse
wrote in attics and lived on crustS.
Stephen Phillips is undoubtedly one
of the leading dramatic poets today.
He has done some great work that
will live in the future. Some critics,
indeed, have limited at ShakeSpear-
can classification. His muse is strictly
classical and he panders not to the
popular taste. He remains upon his
OIympian heights and from thence he
sends forth his poems and dramas to
delight the souls of those attuned to
the finer vibrations. But the book
sellers accounts do not. disclose
large demand for Phillips works. He
never gets among the six best SELL
ers" Possibly he is pleased to remain
influences of the period, but art on a
high plane is often accompanied by
embarrassments, and landlords do
not willingly take their rent in mad
rigals nor grocers their pay in SON
nets. AS result of this rude indif-
contributor to the ethical develop
ment of the period certain impatient
people have recently cited Mr.. Phil
lips for a failure to meet his little OBJ
legations, and bankruptcy proceedings
have been instituted, a fact in itself
sufficiently embarrassing but not all
that has come to vex the soul of the
poet. He was to have attended a pub
lie examination in the bankruptcy
court the other day, but failed to put
in appearance, and his absence was
officially explained as being due to
the entirely logical fact that Mr.. Phil
lips, being a bankrupt, lacked the
price to buy a railroad ticket from his
home in Brighton to the capital
washington Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
SIR. SHE SAID.

SIX. SHE -SAID-
The Lover ami in the dust at
your feet.
The Maiden-You are not. gave
this room thorough sweeping today
Cleveland. Leader. ....-..
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

That new labor agreement in Ger
many whereby a man can quit work
any time he pleases without giving
notice to his employer and can be dis
charged by the latter under similar cir
cumstances, does not appear to have
much 70 recommend it. On the other
hand it would seem that it will work
to the decided disadvantage of both
sides. But then they are ever doing
things in peculiar ways in Germany.
m@@
The painful predicarnent of the Leav-
enworth Post is becoming more appar-
ent every day. With the one issue,
down with Anthony" Albert T. Reid
and his associates have built up the
Post from nothing much to its present
efhciency as a newspaper of worth A
lsrge anti-Anthony faction in Leaven-
worth county depends upon the Leav-
e1lworth Post to help beat Anthony.
The Post doesn't like Brother Anthony
q little bit. but to work for his defeat
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
The Art of Eating.

An enterprising woman named Hol.
ker has started school at Budapest,
full course of instruction in the art of
eating Practical Approximations are
given in ordinary table manners, but
to teach the ignorant how to deal sue
cessfully with such dishes as they have
never heard of. "Who does not recol-
lect in his experience moments of I'M
speakable anguish asks Frau Holker,
when at a dinner party he finds hat
he is using his knife and fork for
versa . 1t is to save men and women
from these little tragedies that have
opened my school," Examinations are
to be held at the end of each term,
when the students will be requested to
attack an array of unknown delicacies
set before them Those who undergo
the ordeal successfully, will obtain a
certificate from Frau Holker which
will enable them to face any banquet
without flinching.-Chicag News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Friend-I suppose you will be writing
a lot of jokes on these bathing suits 2
Professional Humorist-I couldn't on
most of them; there isn't room.-Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
A BRAVE FAITH.

But 10 in the distance the clouds break
away.
And the gates shining portals see;
And hear from the outgoing ships in the
bay
The song of the sailors in glee.
So think of the luminous footprints that
bore
The comfort DER dark Gallilee.
And I wait for the signal to go to the
shore
To the ship that is waiting for ne.
Bret Harte, (written just before his
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Knicker-Has Jones anything for a
rainy day? Bocker-Yes, he has saved
a friend to borrow an umbrella FROM
New York Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

That's a mighty interesting woman
was just talking to yonder." 1T never
noticed it," You know her, then?''
She's my wife."-Houston Post
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

What did you say last night when
Jack asked you to marry him7" Il
shook my head" Sideways or UP and
down Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Il wish 1 understood all the new pro-
visions of the tariff BILL" sighed Mrs.
Gotrox. ''Why?" asked her husband.
Because when l go to Europe I'd lilo
to know just what trinkets II will be
worth my while to smuggle in."-De-
troit Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Tramp Gin the country)-Yes, 1 once
rode bike, but 1 had to give it up.
Cyclist-Why? Tramp-Well, yer sea
the owner was coming down the road
behind me, and the policeman had n
rope stretched across in front.-New
York Tribune.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14
HUMOR or THE DIP

Times have changed among White
House visitors" How so?' 81 Just
saw cowpuncher elbowed aside by a
man in golf clothes.
Bulletin.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

I'm going to. be married next week,
old man. Congratulate me-" well, I
didn't know you were engaged II
wasn't till somebody told me where a
young couple could get a fine cook
cheap. And I hated to miss the op-
nity."-Cleveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

All Hand Work.-Squire (who has
just had his wife's portrait painted
Well, Thomas, what do you think of
1t? Thomas-It's a brave pictur bean't
1t sure 'nough. Be 1t all done by and,
zur?-The Taller.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-14

Here is a little present for you-a
superb $4,000 necklace" "Ohl Hew
nice of your that 1 will let you have
for Ell, 00."-Ideas.
The evening world., 1909-02-15
SUES FOR $4,000
BECAUSE NO ONE
YELLED "HOPPO"
In Weintrauh'S Baths It Means
'Look Out for the
Steam"
SO SAMUEL. DIDN'T LOOK
And Consequently, He Says,
He Could DO No Plumb
ing for Two Months.
SO SAMUEL. DIDN'T LOOK

Wein'raub's baths. IN RIvington
street, have enjoyed highly exclusive
east side patronage for mOnths-since.
INTACT old Bersh Weintraub installed
his home made system of making steam.
Instead of the crude American way. the
Old man sen, his son samuel and a
crowd ~ his east side friends securing
through Long island for several tons Of
large stones.
THESE were thrown into an immense
stove and heated until red hot Then
II deNolNed on one of the weintraub en-
gineers to throw pals OF water into the
furnace of stones. Instantly great
volumes OF steam would rush on, OF the
opening at top and side OF the stove and
Nil the steam room.
II Mr. We!ntraub's exclusive clientele
sought more steam the attendant threw
another pail into the furnace. The
scheme became very popular.
Matters were this way when Samuel
Eichenoaum, one OF our best known
ihlrd avenue plumbers, dropped into
Wentraub's place Nov "a last. He
needed a good steamIng and wasn't
backward in so stating, as he entered.
But no one shouted Hoppe" the con-
glomerate Russian Turkish Ylddsh vel,
Tor look out for the steam" and Mr..
Eichenbaum was severely burned hen
the stweam belched from the furnace
What Weintraub Says.
so far both he and the Welntraubs
harmonized before Justice ODwyer In
Part VII. OF the City Court today,
Weintraub here insisted that Eichen-
baum, impatient at delay. drew two
pals OF water and hurled them into the
furnace to get more steam. There was
e sizzling and mood OF steam, and
Mr., E!chenbaum was OUT Of tho
plumbing business FOR two months.
As he lay on his hospital cot he told
his lawyer. Gus Hartman. that he was
The evening world., 1909-02-15
POISONED BY BAD MILK.

PARKERsBURG, ", Va. Feb. ID
Eight persons are in serious condi-
don to-day from poisoning. said to
have been caused by the use o. impure
milk II Is believed several will die,
The evening world., 1909-02-15

standing seven feet from the stove and
waiting for steam when there was q
Eush. and then more. and he was
scalded, lie didn't hear any cry Of
Hoppe"
In court Samuel Waintraub explained
that the steam Is almost invisible and
comes from the hottest stones on earth.
The higher up II patron climbs on the
improyised steps In this steam-room the
hotter Is the atmosphere naturally. he
sad Echenbaum, lie ntimated. must
have heen slnatting on the top row,
Couldn't Forget His Shape.
Then came witnesses. some OF whom
swOrr that Eichenbaum poured the
water and others maintained that
Echenbaum was climbing the steps
when the blow-ofr came One witness
positively, identified EIchenbaum. He
saw MIN one time a year before the
day the plaintiff was scalded II was
at tuney Island while In bathing. lie
told the Judge he never could forget
EIch-nbaum's shape The Identification
was absolute.
Then came charges OF perjury. Law
Yer kleiner. for the Weintraubs
shouting that every on. OF the Eicher-
baum witnesses We're liars. Four wit
nesses FOR Eichenhaum We're not ac-
cuSei OF not knowing where the steam
Is made. although they swore to help
ing EichenbaIm into a hallway the day
he was burned
Echenbaum sued for s. 100 damages
The case went to the jury abobut
o'clock.
The evening world., 1909-02-15

Strong and massive in appearance; 2-n. continuous
corner posts connecting with 2n brass tube
mental brass connecting husks brass panel
had in f. and IT, in sizes only The ioot.pan IL Al
In. high; the head panel is 66 in. high.
Sixth Gallery, New Building,
La correspondencia de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 1890-1943, 1909-10-10
sLA VILLA DE MADRID. I"

Este importante establecimiento aca'
b. de recibir los impermeables iran,
ceses marca E. H. de fama universal
ssi como Las legitimss Camisetas Il. B.
conocidas del publico de gusto. Tam
bien acabamos de recibir Pa6o de BIZ
liar frances, Casinires ingleses propi o
para verano y el mejor surtido de per
fumeria francesa inglesa sin faltar
las Alfombras lejitimas de Oriente'te-
jidas en- una sola pieza donde no tene-
mos competencia. Tenemos el mas com
pleto surtido en- generos de fantasia a
les precios mas limitados Vender bu--
mas mercancias es el lfma de 'LA
VILLA DE MADRID" Visitenos
8 pidanos muestray sera servido sin
demera-
P. O. B. 764. - Telefono p 5
San Francisco 81. San Juan I. Il