The Washington herald., 1909-01-19

with the editor Of the Washington Post
a man whom Arthur had delighted TO
honor and whose character was TO his
own-weIi. as Hyperion 10 a satyr
An Assistant Secretary OF the Navy,
knitting his high-minded chief in the back
a warrior. alone IN Cuba. saved at
San Juan Hi by black soldiers.
a signer Of an insubOrdinate round
robin which any dignifed War Department
would have punished with summary
court-martisL
a candidate for governor OF New
York. victorious by a mere fiulle, when
the false halo Of san Juan Hill was above
his head
"A nominee Tor Vice President against
his viii.
Beneficiary of AssasSinatIon.
The beneficiary Of assassination, and
last and erowning piece Of luck. the noni-
nee for President when all the aggres-
sive elements OF the opposition wanted to
see their own candidate defeated. the
mammoth jocglarity has got a laugh
with every appearance The gargoyle has
been funny from the hour It left its
native quarry
In his various writings ne points out
the errors Of George Washington
In the life Of Benton he says Thomas
Jefferson WAS 'cOnstitutionslly unable 10
put q proper value on trUthfuIness In
the life Of Morris he ailudes 70 the
utter weakness and folly OF Jefferson's
second term, and the pitiable incompe-
tenee shown by him and his successor
He declares that James Monroe was as
great a failure as his predecessors An
drew Jackson he calls ignorant and head
strong
Martin Van Buren. he insists. faith
fully served the mammOn OF unrighteOus-
ness. John Tyler was a politician Of
monumental Httleness-
Franklin Pierce vas a small politician
OF low capacity and mesn surroundings.
Polk Small President.
James h Polk was. expecting Tyler.
the very smallest OF the small Presi-
dents who came between Jackson and
Lincoln
This covers the elder Harrison. Zach
ary Taylor, MiIlard Fillmore, and James
Buchanan
He has liberation only for the
Adamses. who stood for FederaIist aris-
tocracy. and admiration only for Alex
snder Hamilton. the defeated champion
OF a limited monarchy
-Of course, these cOndemnations rear
as gently as any sucking dove when
compared with his denunciation Of John
Paul Jones as a pirate Of Napoleon
the Great as utterly unscrupulous;' OF
New England's id0lized Wendell Phillips
as always either mischievOus or rIdicu-
lous, and usually BOTH Of Thomas Paine,
the first champion OF American liberty. as
a filthy little atheist OF miracle-belieY-
ing Roman Catholics as persons OF ar
rested mental Developments. Of QUakers
as quite as undesirable citizens as duel
lists
Il have never seen. outside Of an IN
ebriate asylum, any man so cocksure as
our gargoyle that all the rest Of the
world is drunk and he himself is sober
I have never met, except N 3 lunatic
asylum, any person so supFemeiy conf
dent that the universe IS cOnspiTing 20
lie about him. and that ne is the only
truth-teller on earth
Let me at once relieve your sppre-
tensions I do not propose 10 call here
the full roll Of the Ananias Club. II
would weary you Unbearably-
4 may note, however. that the editor
Of the New York Herald has been ac-
cused Of printing fabTications.
That the editor Of the American has
been as bitterly attacked.
That the editor Of the New York Sun
has been charged with 'abOTninable false
hood
and the assault on the venerable pro-
priet0r Of the New York World IS too
fresh in your minds TO Justify It's re-
hearsaL
AnaBias Club Membership.
81 find clergymen. naturalists. diploma
lists. authors, and judges on the Ananias
list
TO Alton B. Parker. New Tork's dis
tinguished jurist. are attributed state
ments 'unequivocally and arociously
false
ITO Benamy storer. conduct simply
dish0norable
TO Chief Engineer Wallace. late Of
the Panama Canal. allegations 'absO-
lutely untrue
TO G. o. Shields. president OF the
League Of American SpOrtsmen. mere
TO Edward Il Hartman. deliberate,
wiIlful Untruths
ITO Admiral Brownson, gross fmpro-
priety'
James r Gilmore. a writer. better
known as Edmund Kirke.' is branded as
q coward, convicted Of repeated and de-
Iiberate faIsehoods
'Poultney BigeIow and Senator Fora
ker get OF with denunciations by innu-
enco.
William E. Chandler.
William E. Chandler, ex-Secretary Of
the Navy. is charged with deliberate and
unqualified falsehood
Gov Haskell. Of Oklahoma, IS called
a scandal and disgrace
Herbert Winthrop Bowen IS accused
Of saying what was absolutely untrue
The Rev William J. Long. OF 'delib-
crate peTyersion OF facts
Judge Smith, OF the Wisconsin Su-
preme Court, OF making false state
ments.
Jack London is added TO the Ananias
roll because he had the wrong idea OF
what would happen IL a wolf-dog should
fight a wolf
"All are incurably mendacious.
Our gargyle alone is the carved statue
OF immutable truth"
INDUSTRIAL PEACE FAVORED.