Evening star., 1909-06-20

L
cult in bottles or jugs or something. Nc
matter how good the water Of the DIT
| ferent towns may be, It's commonly
known fact that the mere changing OF
effect upon many folks and ball PLAYERS
are up against incessant changes OF drink
ing water. 1t wouldn't be such dim
| cut thing for travelling clubs to tote their
own drinking fluid around with them. II
wouldn't be bad scheme II only Tor
| the purpose OF satisfying the imagi-
nations Of the ball players who have got
| the bug that the changing Of drinking
| waters is gradually hurting them into an
| early grave. Yet, come to think OF II;
some ball players are such confirmed
yowlers that If such concession were
made there'd presently be some Of them
who'd be demanding after while that
the club carry its own pastry cook. Ice
cream maker, chiropodist. barber and vo-
cal Instructor. Because hombreys. 1T
one of the safest CANDLES you ever made
in your life that the more you give to
some ball players IN the way OF free
gratis creature comforts the more they're
going to be demanding.
Is Jimmy McAleer chagrined, perturbed,
mortified and sa-ad at heart over the hot
wallop stuff that's being ladled out to him
by the home critics over the showing
that's being made by the Browns?
Not SOS you can discern 1t with deep
sea binocular; James, he Is not.
Am worrited?" said he the other day.
well, I'm scrambling outside of three
squares, composed mainly of meat and po-
tatoes and gravy. three times per day.
and the things that I do in the hay
pounding line-nine hours every night
are something scandalous. And II fel-
low can get through with that kind OF a
nourishing routine day by day he isn't
liable to nudge over the big divide from
the worry thing before the beginning or
the dog days, is he?
Nix on the gloom gag. It never gets
anybody anything, least OF all man
ager-a near-manager, they're calling me
now, did you notice?-of a ball team.
mean-I'm the tallowy-haired kid. and
they want my autograph in their albums.
and the ST. Louis restaurateurs are mad
uh if I don't have time to eat at their
places, and the papers talk about run
ming me for the common council. and
they're agitating the naming of a new
suburb after me, and I'm mitted so often
during the forenoons and evenings that
go around with sciatica Of the digits.
when we're not getting anything worth
mentioning. as now, for instance. why. the
former Mr.. McAleer is Jimmy the Bum,
the gink who used to be ball player
and club manager. but who now ought 10
be shofering trolley car or captainlns
Acoo
who ought to be pinched under the new
vag law and all like that way.
so, son, you see I'm familiar with all
the mutations and vicisstudes-kind o
poor f1ivs, those words. yes?-of the ball
business. and. that being the case, | tied
a tin on the caudal appendage of Mr..
Worry hull passel of years ago. and l
haven't seen the fellow since.
And I've got it figured out. at that
that a ball team manager oughtn't to
expect the folks at home to be tossing
him nosegays of orchids right along
whether his team is on the fritz or not
It's the old case of being the bully boy
with the chiney eye If you deliver re-
suits and a tramp If you fall way to the
rear of the bell COW. I've got no KICK.
game, and I believe in playing the game
on that basis. You don't happen to have
ary piece O. navy twist about your nome
spuns, do your
X
The other day when Hughey Jennings
was summoned to the home dish by the
umpire and handed a large armful OF
peonies. the gift Of his old Baltimore pals.
who dropped over to see the game. Bill
Donovan let out rumble.
THAT settles it, said Bill. THE game
has only just begun. Bet we lose. It's
d
bloomer for us. Never saw 1t fail yet.
Every time that gift gag is pulled during
the progress of ball game the receivers
of the gift get the creased skids put un-
der them as sure as eggs IS alss. WaIcn
this out and you'll see that I've got the
DOPE"
Bill, he done had the dope all proper
enough. The score when Hughey got ms
posies was nothing to nothing, but at the
end of the game it was to In favor
- mOOcho0
out Of the ball yard he was there with
that What did tell your thing as big
as a timber wolf.
1 saw that gift thing work out the same
way twice in New York earlier in the sea-
son. When Roger Bresnahan nudged
along with his club, the New York fans,
as a sort Of testimonial to the fine stuff
he'd pulled while a member OF the
Muggsyites. were there with a whole lay
out OF silverware with Rogers name on
it, a mess Of travelling bags. and a whole
lot of nifty gear of that sort.
The Junk was handed to Roger just be-
fore he went to the bat. with lot OF
superheated-steamy spooches and all like
that Roger turned ten or twelve diff
ferent shades Of crimson and vermillion
while ne hoarsely exuded few phrases
Of thanks. and then the gift gear was
yanked out Of the yard and Roger picked
UP his club to see what he could do for
himself. The first one was right smack
dab over, in the groove. and Roger miss
ed 1t by six and half fathoms. Then
the pitcher, perceiving how ratified Bres-
nahan was through that gift gag, handed
him a slow one that caused Roger to
shatter his spinal vertebrae in seventeen
different places, hitting at 1t before 1t got
within nine feet of the plate, and then.
lust by way Of good measure. Roger took
another slap at it after the catcher had
the ball, thus messing up his system
some more. Then he whitfield. He didn't
get hit during the series of four games
in New York, and his bunch laid 1t all
to the gift stuff.
Next the New York friends of Honus
Wagner slipped him a loving cup on the
New York grounds. and that put the
Methodist sign on him. too. He couldn't
hit a dirigible with a barrel stave after
that and on the bases he looked like an
old fashioned base-burner stove trying to
do the Salome dance.
There isn't a ball player in the business
who when he's tipped off that he's going
to be handed something in the gift line.
doesn't wish to all goshhan-g-it that
they'd give 1t to him at the hotel or any
where else except in ball yard when
a game Is on.