davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
cnW SENSATION -RUsT-REsIsTING marc
Book FREE. CHILL. SEED CO.. ELL Point. S. OAK
EGG Shaped Skulls.

i rom lIe New YORK Herald.
The egg shaped heads of some of the
natives of Malekula, in the New He
brides. Were once thought to be natur
ally comical. For that reason scientific
mon decided that the Malekulans We're
on the lowest rnng of the human lad
der. Later it was found that the conf
cal heads We're produced as the Chinese
woman distorted their feet, by binding
them in infancy, says Il writer in the
Geographical Magazine. The egg
shaped head is still Fashionable in
Malekula, where some extraordinary
results are achieved.
a conical head retreats from the fore
head in such Il manner that one is
amazed TO know the owner of this re-
markable profile preserves his or her
proper senses such as they are. 1 could
not hear. however. that the custom was
supposed to affect the intellect in any
way.
The conical shape is produced by
winding strong sinnet cord spirally
about the heads of the babies and
Tightening the cords from time to time.
A piece of plcated mat is first put on
the head and the cord is coiled over
this so as to give it good purchase.
The crown OF the head is left to develop
in the upward and backward fashion
that is so much admired
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Money Made I'm Live stock in Gem
trail Canada.

Money Made I'm Live Stock in Gem
trail Canada.
w. j. Henderson, visiting Seattle.
writes to the Canadian Government
agent at Spokane. Wash, and says:
1 have neighbors living there and
raising wheat, barley and pats for the
past twenty years, and are now getting
from the same land 90 to 30 bushels
of wheat per acre, 40 to 60 bushels of
oats.
1t was the first week of May when
l got my tent pitched, but the farmers
all around had finished putting in their
crops. so l only got fifteen acres broke
and seeded They advised me, as 1t
was late, not to put in much wheat. so
I put in five acres wheat and ten acres
oats. one-half acre potatoes and vegeta
bles. All kinds of vegetables grow
well up there-sweet corn. tomatoes
onions, carrots, peas beans, cabbage
My wheat yielded about 30 bushels per
acre, for which / got 7t; cents, others
got 80 cents; oats thresled 80 bushels
per acre. for which got 81 cents per.
bushel. You see was three weeks
late getting them in; still was salts
fed.
From my observation. there is more
money made in stock, such as cattle.
horses and sheep, as prices are high for
such, and it costs nothing 10 raise
them, rs horses live the year around
out on the grass In fact, farmers turn
their work horses out for the winter
and they come in fresh and fat in the
spring. Cattle live out seven or eight
months. They NOW the prairie grass
and stack it for winter and give oat
straw. My neighbors sold steers at
$40 each, and any kind of horse THAI
can plow, from $3.50 up. / raised sixty
chickens and five pigs as pork. chick
ems. butter and eggs pay we'll and al
ways good marked for anything IL
man raises, so | have every reason to
be thankful, besides ct the end of three
years l get my patent for homestead
| heard OF no homestead selling for less
than $4,000, so where under the sun
could an old man or young man do
| better?
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
TAFT WILL Be THE
HEAVIEST PRESIDENT
Breaks the Record for Weight.
and Is Heavier Than Any
of Europe's Rulers.

When William Howard Taft takes the
oath of office next March no will be the
heaviest CHIEF magistrate in the world.
Weight, 2s6 pounds: height. feet g. Pres
ident Fallieres of France is poor second.
at 229 pounds. OF the other living rulers
OF Europe King Leopold of the I3elgians
is the heaviest, weighing 224 pounds. King
Edward VII weighs 1893: the German kais-
err. III; Francis Joseph of Austria, 1865:
Alfonso OF Spain, ISL. Queen Wilhelmina
of Holland weighs 145 pounds; King
Hackon VII of NORWAY, 2o1 che was elected
by The people if you remember correctly.
Oscar III OF Sweden tipped the beam at
1874, the czar OF Russia at 1853 and Victor
Emmanuel Ill Of Italy at 155.
OF our own presidents, Washington. JEFF
ferson, Monroe, William Henry Harrison.
Lincoln, Garfield and Cleveland were con-
spicuous among the physical heaNyweights
OF their times. While in some cases the
bodily weight was due rather to unusual
analysis the heavy men of whatever build
have been the prime favorites of the peo-
pie.
1t is safe to say that of our % presi-
dents we may class II as of high admin
istrative ability. Assuming though opin-
ions may differ-that these are Washing
ton John Adams, Jefferson, Monroe,
Jackson William Henry Harrison, Taylor,
Lincoln. Cleveland. Mckinley and Roose-
Welt. 1t is found that the average weight
of these men is fraction over 30 pounds
During Mr.. Cleveland's second admins
tration he weighed 295 pounds, exactly
the weight of Mr.. Taft today. MIR Roose-
velt's present weight is 2oS pounds.
On the other hand the average weight
of the present heads OF II leading Euro
pean government it is but a trifle over 1at
pounds EACH which strengthens the theory
that, other things being equal. republics
have a peculiar weakness for physical
heavyweights.
The New York World tabulates The
height and weight of American presidents
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
The Oriain of the Camel.

II was quite interested to read state
by Il distinguished authority, that the
camel is not of Asiatic origin but entirely
American" said the professor.
Indeed" said little Bnks. Well. now.
that is interesting.
Yes said the professor. '.lie showed
by means of series of pictures of skele-
tons which his party had dug up while
making excavations in Wyoming the de-
velopmeilt of the animal They ran from
a camel about the size Of a rabbit. having
fpnr toes instead of two. and absolutely
devoid Of anything like Il hump up To
larger specimens of II later period the
most abundant of which WAS long
legged, long checked camel about the size
and general build of an antelope. All the
camel characteristics We're present except
some later developments of changing en-
Nironmcnt"
observation-disclosures. said little Binks
Does he account for the hump
Not according to the reports | have
seen III the papers," replied the professor
II don't believe that can be accounted
for
oh, ] don't know" said little Kinks
Maybe the original camel was like the
rest of u.s.
In what respect sir" demanded the
professor, gazing coldly at little I'inks
over his eyeglasses.
why, he had to hump himself to make
II living" said little Isinks. meekly.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Private Forestry in ENGLAND.

From the FEBRUARY Garden Magazine.
Everywhere in England you see pri-
waite forests planted for profit. England
first won her naval supremacy in ships
built OF English oak trees which were
practically planted for the purpose on
private estates. Public or state for
estry hardly exists In England. Here
we commonly think that forestry con-
Germs the government only. few
Americans will plant catalpa, locust, or
some other tree crop that natures In
seven to Is years. but when the pas
sion for enduring things becomes ma
tional trait with us we will plant oaks
and other species that require hun
drcd years or more to mature. Mean
while. the bureau of forestry AT
Washington, ID. c., has Il plan fol
operating with anyone who has a
forest in which profit is the chief con-
silnrlt ION
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Vast Wealth bal Forests.
From Washington Letter to the Bost
Nranscrint


The forests of the United States now!
cover about 550,O00,000 acres. or about
onc-fourth of the land of the whole
country. The original forests covered
not less than S50.000.000 acres, or near
ly one-half.
The forests owned by the govern
ment cover fourth of the total for
est area, and contain one fifth of all
timber standing. Forests privately
owned cover three fourths of the area,
and contain four-tifths of the standing
timber Besides having three times
the area and four times the forests the
timber land privately owned Is gener-
servative numbering, is practiced on
10 per cent of the forests publicly
owned and on less than ] per cent of
the forests privately owned. This COW
ers the country's forest resources as
they stand today. Senator Smoot,
chairman of the section Of forests Of
the national conservation commission,
in outlining the future. has said:
by reasonable thrift we can produce
a constant timber supply beyond our
present need. and with a conserve the
usefulness of our streams for irriga-
ton, water supply, navigation and
power. Under right management. our
much as now We can reduce waste
In the woods and in the mill at least
one-t third, with present az well as flu
ture profit. We can pcrpetuate the
naval stores Industry. Preservative
treatment will reduce by fifth the
quantity of timber used in the water
or in the ground We can practically
stop forest fires al total yearly cost
of one-fifth the value of the standing
timber burned each year, not counting
young growth. We shall suffer for tim
Der to meet our needs until our forests
have had time to grow again But If
we act vigorously and at once we shall
escape permanent timber scarcity
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
A Generous GIFT.

Professor Munyon has just issued a
most beautiful, useful and complete al
manac. 1t contains not only all the sci
enti6c information concerning the moon $
phases, in all the ATTITUDES, but has illus
trated articles on how to READ character
by phrenology, palmistry and birth
month. 1t also tells all about card read
ing, birth stones and their meaning. and
gives the Interpretation Of dreams. 1t
teaches beauty culture, manicuring, gives
weights and measures and antidotes for
poison. In fact, it is a Magazine AL
manac. that not only gives valuable in
formation, but will afford much amuse-
ment for every member of the family,
especially for parties and evening enter
tainments. Farmers and people in the
rural districts will find this Almanac al
most invaluable.
1t will be sent to anyone absolutely
free on application to the Munyon Rem
esq Company, Philadelphia, Pa.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
TIE
Exceptional
Eqzxip1nenf

of the California Fig Syrup Co. and tho
scientific attainments of it's chemists have
rendered possible the production of Syrup
of Figs and Elixir of SIENNA, in all of it,
excellence, by obtaining the pure medic-
inal principles of plants known to act most
benefcially and combining them most
skillfully, in the right proportions, with
it's wholesome and refreshing Syrup Of
California Figs.
AS there is only one genuine Syrup Of
Figs and Elixir of SIENNA and as the gem
uine is manufactured by an original
method known to the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, it is always necessary to buy tho
genuine to get its beneficial effects.
A knowledge Of the above facts enables
one to decline limitations or to return them
if, upon viewing the package, the full name
of the California Fig Syrup Co is not found
printed on the front thereof.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
IN AGONY WITH ECZEMA

Whole Cody Mass of Raw. Blceh-
Ing. rorturin9 Humor-Hnir All
Fell Out-Hoped Death Would End
Fearful SuTering-In Despair
Cured by Cuticurn.
Words cannot describe the terrible
eczema | suffered with. 1t broke out
ON my head and kept spreading until
1T covered by whole body | was all
most n solid mass of sores from head
to foot. l looked more like piece of
raw beef than human being. The
pain and agony | endured seemed more
than could bear. Blood and pus
ooZed from the great sore Oh my scalp
from under my finger nails, and near
ly all over my body. My ears were SO
crusted and swollen / was afraid they
would break off. Every hair in my
head fell out. 1 could not sit down,
for my clothes would stick to the raw
and bleeding flesh. making me cry out
from the pain. My family doctor die.
all he could, but / got worse and
worse. My condition was awful. 1
did not think could live. and wanted
death to come and end my frightful
sufferings.
I'm this condition my mother-in-law
begged me to try the Cuticura Rem
edies. I said ! would, but had no hone
of recovery. But oh, what blessed re-
lief experienced after applying Cuti-
cura Ointment. 1t cooled the bleeding
and itching flesh and brought me the
first real sleep | had had in weeks. 1t
was as grateful as ice to burning
tongue. l would battle with warm
water and Cuticura Soap, then apply
the Ointment freely. 1 also took Cutl-
cura Resolvent for the blood. In n
short time the sores stopped running,
the flesh began to heal, and / knew 7
was to get well again. Then the hair
on my head began to grow, and In a
short time / was completely cured.
wish ! could tell everybody who has
eczema to use Cuticura. Mrs VIM.
Hunt, 135 Thomas ST., Newark, N. j..
Sept. %, 1908"
Potter Drug & Chem. Corp, Sole
Props. Of Cuticura Remedies, Boston.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
From the New York American

DIR. Bedloc. former consul at Annoy.
was introduced to Edward Levy, a
merchant OF Raleigh. N. G. Frequently
DR.. Bedloe was addressed by some of
his storytelling acquaintances as
Doc
Some years ago. related the North
Carolinian, Il was advised to consult
DIR. Osler the famous Johns Hopkins
pathologist He looked me over and
then prescribed a new mode of living.
rather than lot of medicine. He
wasn't with me 20 minutes.
Nov, down at home. where we know
the physicians we hail them good ma
turedly as Doc Forgetting that l
was stranger said to Osler: Well,
how do we stand. 'Doc?"'
Fifty dollars he replied, and his
tone of voice had no sweetness in It,
What's that Doc?' / asked. Fifty"
az said fifty dollars he answered;
fifty dollars
Il paid it and hurried away. Soon I
began thinking, and the notion came to
me that he added a few dollars for the
manner in which l addressed him.
"Since which time" concluded Mr..
Levy, when addressing a physician
call him Mister, Doctor. or Esquire
General Mortez Khan, the Persian
envoy to this country, was invited not
| long ago to attend an evolutionary con-
vention. 1t was held in the auditorium
of the Carnegie library of Washington,
and entrance was through the lobby of
the library. The general arrived late,
and, as the hall was overflled, the
doorkeeper refused to admit him. The
general waxed angry. Pulling out his
invitation. he showed it to the obdurate
guard. II can't let you in" repeated
| the man.
Then the general pulled out his visit
tv,rr f,-I oh =
yard across. 1t was dazzling with gold
! letters and Persian characters
1 Take this to the chairman" he said
in broken English
After while the tiler came back.
Nothing doing" he said. in laconic
| English.
Nothing doing!" half sirieked the
angry envoy.
Nothing DOING" And out he rushed.
] In minute back he came. "Well, IL
there is nothing doing" he insisted.
get my card back" And get the card
| back he did
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
A Soma of Ear Travel.

Many time some drowsy oar
'TwiXt uplifting and down-setting-
Crossed u narrow stream, and bore
In anon gthe reeds moon-lighted.
There to leave me shore
No ferryman hath sighted.
Many time Il mountain stile
Dark and bright with sudden wetting,
Lured my vagrant foot the while
fwiXt uplifting and down setting
Whittier? Thousand mile on mile
Beyond the last forgetting.
Stll by hidden ways | Wend.
1'ast occasion grown Il ranger).
Stll enchantment. like Il friend,
Takes from death the tang of danger:
Hardly river or road can end
Where j need step a stranger!
--ILeiise Iiaogen quincy, in he October
aYlalltic
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Those Tireless DOGS.

Sir Leopold McClintock the Arctic ex-
plorer who died recently, was once giving
an account of his experiences amid the
ice fields OF the north.
I'VE certainly would have Travelled
much farther" he explained, had not oul
dogs given out at a critical moment"
Put" exclaimed a lady, who had beer
listening very intently, II thought that
Eskimo dogs We're perfectly tireless crea-
lures"
Sir Leopold's face Wore a whimscally
gloomy expression as he replied, Ter
speak in Il culinary sense. miss.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
The Will to Do Wrong.

From the Homiletic Review
We cannot will the evil, and be saved
from all the consequences and fruits of
evil. If we We're only reasonable men,
il we only believed 1T was a reasonable
world that we live in. we should not be-
ieve in such a FOOLS paradise. The idea
of man willing an evil. and then ex
pecting in some strange magical way to
be saved from the results of the evil! The
evil is already done when the heart is
wholly given up to 1t, and sooner or later
we must have our way. We persist, we
tempt God for it, we desire 1T. we long
after 1t, we want nothing else but this:
we seek 1T, we will have It, we must have
it. Take it, man, take it, the sin and the
curse, the desire and the sting. God said
unto Balaam Go. and Gods anger was
kndled because he went
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18

and cure the con-
gestion or inham-
nation of the kid
neys that is inter
fering with their
work and causing
that pain that
makes you say:
"Oh, my back J"
Dav d Price.
Corydon, 10 w Il,
says: MY back
was so weak and
lame l could hard
iy walk. The kid
neys showed bad
disorders + ran
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Would Change the Bill.

A repertoire company was Walking
into Paducah, says the Saturday Even
ing Post, where they were billed to
play Romeo and Juliet" The leading
man approached the manager, who
strobe moodily ahead on the ties.
Boss" he said, I've got to have Is
cents"
Fifteen cents?" growled the man
What do you want Is cents for?"
What do i want Is cents for?" re-
piled the leading man bitterly. Il
want it for a shave, that's what / want
it for. / can't play Romeo with five
days black beard on my face"
ooh. WE'LL" said the manager, you
won't get no 10 cents. Wen change
the bill to 'Othello.'"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Correctly Described.

A late chief staff officer of one of the
Infantry regiments, relating some of the
experiences of the expedition, said that
one day, after hours OF laborious climb
ing up a steep and never ending path,
he heard groan of despair from a pri-
vate soldier.
Look ere, Bill. I've 'ad enough of
this" the soldier said to his comrade.
II was told as low it was a bloomin'
tableland."
$50 it is. Can't we see we're climbin'
up one of the legs of it?" returned Bill,
with a jocular superiority.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
,,y Passage.

Many year is in its grave
Since crossed this restless wave,
And the evening, fair as ever,
Shines on ruin, rock and river.
Then, In this same boat. beside.
Sat two comrades. old and tried;
One withall fathers truth.
One with all the fire of youth.
One on earth In science wrought.
And his grave In silence sought,
But the younger. brighter form.
Passed in battle and in storm.
So, Whenever I turn mine eye
Back upon the days gone by,
Saddening thoughts Of friends come DER
me,
Friends who closed their course before me.
Yet what binds us, friend to friend.
But that soul with soul can blend:
Soul-like were those hours of yore-
Let us walk in soul once more.
Take. @ boatman. twice thy fee.
Take--I give it Willingly
For. invisible to thee
Spirits twain have crossed with me.
johann Ludwig INLAND.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Mo plac, for Him.

1t was one of those deep growing
basso arias which hang Indefinitely on
the edge OF real tune without ever
quite hitting It, And the man in the
party had no use for 1t at all.
When it was over the girl turned to
him.
"Ah." she remarked "1s that not
lovely perfectly lovely?-that Aria to
NV Absent Love-"
He looked at her.
so that's what it IS, CHI" he ex-
claimed. why i had doped it out as
an ode to a Chuck Steak.
They attended no more concerts to-
gether that season.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
70 restore a normal action to liver,
Kidneys, stomach and bowels take Gar.
field Tea, the mild herb laxative.
overtaken.

A wizened little man charged his wife
with cruel and abusive treatment. His
better half or in this case better two
thirds, was a big, square jawed woman
with determined eye.
The Judge listened to the plaintiffs re-
cital of wrongs with interest.
Where did you meet this woman who,
according TO your story, has treated you
SO dreadfully?" his honor asked
We'll. judge replied the little man,
making a brave attempt to glare defiantly
at his wife. II never did meet her. She
just kind of overlook me-
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Only Half H.npx.

During decidedly stormy passage to
New York. Israel Zangwill, the play
wright and novelist, said one night in
the smoking room of the steamship:
1t is pleasant to cross the Atlantic,
but this bad weather is mingling a
good deal of discomfort with our plea
sure, Life is usually, though, like that
pleasure and pain-half and half
ut reminds me of an elderly spinster
who sat near me at the table d'hote one
niece, 1 heard her say:
- In Venice at last. All. my dear,
half the dream of my youth is now
fulfilled
why only half, auntie? the young
girl asked.
'I counted on going to Venice.
sighed the spinster, ON my wedding
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
Tho Kiss.

mo MISS.
Something made of nothing, tasting very
sweet,
A most delicious compound, with ingredi-
ents complete!
But IL as on occasion the heart and mind
are sour,
1t has no great significance. it loses half
its power.
Something made of nothing, and never
twice the same,
Though tbs known in every country
where love has had name:
1t Is clearly meant for giving, though It's
sometimes bought and sold.
And, like coffee and potatoes, is not so
good when cold.
1t oft appeases discord when words have
failed to please,
Whether bestowed caressingly or given
just to tease;
For laugh will often save one from
doing something worse,
And the lips that taste this sweetness are
seldom heard to curse.
It's the strangest oldest mixture, this
something made of naught
Which is never seen or handled, although
tbs often caught,
Which will not spoil In keeping. whatever
be the Cline
For this something made of nothing will
stand the test of time.
Mary F.. Buell..
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18

down until almost n skeleton. thought
there was no hope for me and moth
ing helped me until l began using
Doan's Kidney Pills I improved rap
idly and finally became SO we'll that the
trouble never returned"
Sold by all Dealers 80 cents box.
Foster Milburn Co, Buffalo, n. Y.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
whi.key for Lame Back.

TO one-half pint good whiskey. add
one ounce syrup sarsaparilla and one
ounce of Toris compound, which can be
procured of any druggist Take in tea
spoonful doses before each meal and
before retiring. This recipe is said to
be the best known to medical science.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1909-02-18
TO TAKE OFF A EIGHT RING.

When a ring has become too tight for
the finger, as 1t often happens among
growing children, instead of using the old
method Of filing, take a piece of common
Irvine, insert one end under ring towards
the hand, the other end wind closely
around the finger until over the Joint. Now
proceed to wind with the end back of the
ring. and IL done correctly the tightest
ring will come off easily.