davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
THE INDIANS PAID.
What the White Men Charged Then.
For Killing One Donkey.

What the White Men Charged Then.
For Killing One Donkey.
In "Reminiscences of Old Times In
Tennessee" a story is told of the good
faith and honor OF 2 party of Chicka-
saw Indians. While hunting one fail
they sho, donkey. MISLEADING the
creature for wild animal They sold
the hide. and It finally came to the
hands of Johu Barnes In Upton.
When the Chirkaslws returned TO
the region Of Upton for their annual
hunt the next fall Barnes invited them
to shouting match. the prize TO be
the skin OF very rare animal.
Thirty braves appeared at the con-
test, and one of them won the prize.
When be saw the skin he turned IL
over and said: "Ha. ha. Me kill him.
Me shoot him! Seer And he polluted
to the fatal butler hole.
Then Barnes told them that they had
killed donkey. very useful animal.
but be was sure that they had done II
by mistake. believing il TO be a wild
animal.
The Indians listened attentieely to
the white mans words and then con
suited together few minutes Finally
they separated. each brave going to his
pony. unhitching him and leading him
to the spot where a gang of white men
stood, Barnes in the midst of them.
Then one Of the Indians spoke:
I'VE sorry we kill donkey. We think
be belong to the woods. We find him
In cane. We think him wild. We sor-
ry. Now we pay. We take no white
mans boss, pony. nothing of white
man. we honest. We have ponies;
that's all. Bake pay" And he mo-
toned to the long line of ponies, held
by their owners.
'How many?" asked Barnes.
white man say" returned the In
dian: take plenty"
The homer of the red men was not
egualed by the white men, for, be 1t
recorded to their shame, they took
from the Chickasaws thirty-fve ponies
to pay for the accidental killing of one
donkey
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05

II Is a Serious Business TO the Man
Who Coneocts II.

" Is SERIOUS BUSINESS 20 tne NAN
Who coneocts It.
There's one thing 1 thought / know.
bur lind / don't knOw," said Tommy
"What is a loke:"
Father prmked up his ears. as it
were "a joke" he said slowly. lis
something It's maker thinks is funny
but nobody Else does"
THAT explains II then. Today said
an awful quaint thing. Mother had II
lot Of women here. aud they talked
about clothes. said: "A womanS
mind is always on clothes. When she
amt talking through her hat she's
laughing up her sleeve But 10 one
laughed. and | read that one too. Tell
the joke.
IF were TO say when ! came home
from visiting the cemetery that / had
returned from the dead. that would be-
joke"
lis that a practical joke?"
1T is not It's a grave joke
Whats IA practical joker
IF your mother just before going
out shopping asked for money and
gave her all she wanted"
do you like practical jokesT
mot when they're as practical as
that"
Does every one like jokesY
''I'ew people do. Most think Il IS
more blessed to give than to receive"
''rhen people can't take joker
There are some who can't. Editors.
for instance. rarely take joke"
Does any one make money from the
writing of jokes?'
only the papermakers and the post
al department of the government"
'Must joke be funny to be joker"
Few are"
Then some are serious?"
mot exactly. But if you refer to
sexton as man of grave cares some
might think you intended to be jOcu-
lar"
is pun like joker
Nothing at all. a man who makes
a joke is an idiot. whereas a man who
makes n pun is a criminal"
Then the man who writes what he
thinks are jokes is a funny fellow"
no it is serious business with
him"
HE has his ups and downs, then?
YES. He gets UP courage to write
to editors and gets turned down by
them"
You're not referring to the man
who writes the column in the papers
every day? Surely life is one joke
with him"
mo. it isn't He thinks he's a hu-
morlst. but he's pesSimlst. He'd
rather be hodcarrier"
"Why. does bodcarrier make more
money!
"Well. be has habit Of climbing and
often goes higher Besides. the out
door work is healthier"
Isn't joke writing healthy?
Not when you're caught at it."
Can a man write jokes and still be
gentleman
You forget. Tommy. that our re-
marks are intended for publication
and that | have many friends who
write. Besides. sometimes get of
joke or two myself" - Philadelphia
Ledger.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
Back Numbers.

william" said Mrs. Van Gelder to
the man of all work. II want you to
clean out that large closet in the hall
just outside the parlor. Burn all the
old newspapers, waste paper and any
other rubbish you may find there"
After a short time she met William
in the hall carrying in his arms a huge
pile of sheet music, the property of her
eldest daughter.
"What are you going to do with Ma
bells musicT' she asked.
why, burn it. sure, as you told me
to. 1t was in the closet there with the
other rubbish"
But 1 didn't mean the music. Put it
back at once"
Noting his mistress displeasure, VIII
Sliam inquired In surprise:
"Why, hasn't she played it alp
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
An Apology?

A London journal says that a lively
discussion once took place in a town
council in the north of England. One
thing led to another till one of the
disputants gave another the lie direct.
The insulted party rushed forward.
and the pair clinched. At that mo-
ment the first man exclaimed. II re-
iterate that you are liar" To the
establishment of every one, the aggriev-
ed party let go his hold. Ion, WELL
he said, lin that case accept the
apology. If man says he reiterates.
that is all any gentleman can ask He
did not understand why the bystand-
ers laughed, but the fight was OF.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
ToWER OF LONDON.
The Perfect System by Which It's
Treasures Are Guarded.

The Perfect System by Which It's
Treasures Are Guarded.
The Tower of London has the most
perfect system of burglar alarms that
has yet been devised.
From Scotland Yard. from the gov.
ernor's headquarters and from other
places known only to few respon.
sibIe officials the whole Tower can I've
closed electrically within few ser.
onds. Even the ponderous gates at
the middle tower. which weigh some
tons and through which visitors pass
Z swing to automatically, and the escape
OF every one within is instantly barred.
At the same time an alarm bell rings
to warn wardens, police and soldiers.
In particular the precautions 10 the
apartment containing the crown jew.
els IRE of most scientifically eiabo-
rate kind One Of the beefeaterS on
duty In the room has merely to press
a button. whereupon the heavy door
closes, the alarm bell below rings, the
other gates slam TO aud lock. aud every
person within the tower is instantly
cut or from the outer world.
''The man who can get away with
any OF the crown jewels deserves
them" observed Tower ofticia,
Enron where | am standing | could
close every important door and gate
in the Tower in as short time as Il
takes to utter these words"
1t was mainly to insure the safety
Of the crown jewels that the system
was installed.
No order had been issued for the
closing Of the Tower on recent Sat
urday when. greatly to their alarm
the visitors found doors locked. boltpd
and barred against them for about ten
minutes. preventing any one leaving
the Tower.
1.-The Tower simply closed-that is
ALL" remarked an official who cauS-
ed it TO do so we do not know 1t
might have been Scotland Yard where
the pressing of button would i'm.
prison every soul within the Tower I'M.
til the police gave the signal for their
release or it might have been the
governor, anxious to learn whether we
were all at our posts. At any rate, it
was none of the minor officials.
''In fact. who closed the Tower and
why is secret known only to the
highest authorities. There was no
alarm, no attempt to seize the crown
jewels" -London Mail.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
WouIdn,t Hann the Jury.

An old negro named Ephraim, hav-
ing been sworn on the jury in muir
der trial, for some time resisted a YER
dict OF guilty for no other apparent
reason than his strong aversion to CAPT
tai punishment in general. Finally the
foreman explained to him that It was a
question either OF hanging the prisoner
or hanging the jury and that 1t all de-
pended on him. "Fo' gracious. sab"
replied Uncle Ephraim. ION dem rea.
sonments de pris'ner am sho' guilty"
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
MADE THE MOST OF 1T.
Glover Tactics When William Quit
Using Tobacco.


Using Tobacco.
An excerpt from Doris letter: "And.
oh, VIII, IL you weren't the dear
est boy! You often told me that
you would do anything 10 the world
for me. and now you write for my
sake you've quit smoking. I'll have to
wait until see you TO tell you what a
dear think you are"
From Janis: "You write that out of
consideration for me you have stopped
smoking for good. That was just love
ly of you. William. and you may de
pend that | greatly appreciate it,"
From Phyllis: BILLY. boy, it's just
ripping! You're the dandy kid Just TO
think that you would swear of using
the weed just for me: 1t was mighty
dear of you. Billy. and it makes me all
the more keen for you"
From Marjorie: ITO think that
you've quit smoking, William! l was
so surprised. OF course always knew
that you care for me, but to think that
as you say. you've made this sacrifice
on my account-why, it's positively
noble of you"
From his mother: will. my son
this proves your love for me. Father
is inclosing a check to show that he
appreciates the fact that you think
enough Of your parents to give up
smoking for them"
From his doctor: "Your letter ad-
vising me that you have obeyed my
orders and stopped the use of tobacco
is at hand. AS | said, your compli-
ance A."-Puck.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
Panitenoa.

Il suppose you're sorry now?" asked
the prison visitor, according to the
Philadelphia Ledger.
The young man who had stolen ST.
900 and spent it in sixteen weeks
sighed through the bars. ''Oh, yes"
ne answered. II tried to cut too much
Of a spIurge. The money ought to
have lasted me a week longer"
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05

my wife is getting so she can cook. d"
you are prejudlced in her favor"
mo, l am not She gave a tramp
a piece OF pie last week, and he has
been back for more three times"
Perhaps be is after a hero medal 4"
Houston Post.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
Innt smita Him.

Friend-Why do you encourage these
woman's suffrage meetings? Surely
you don't approve of them. Husband
Approve? With all my heart! l can
come home as late as like now with
out finding my wife at home to ask
questions. F1iegende Batter
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
Hilarious.

Clarence-Pm going to ask old Vavn
sour for his daughters hand What's
good way to begin? Algy-Oh. spring
a few other jokes on him first and 500
how he takes them Exchange.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
Nillana Gosain.

"Is Squire milestone considerable Of
dumb animalsY'
~ don't know bow he treats EN-"
answered 81 Smiling. ''but he certain
ly. speaks mighty kind Of 'em when
he's engineerin' a boss trade."-Wash-
ington Star.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
No Chance.

81 think it's wrong for a married
man to gamble"
tits worse than wrong. It's idiotic.
His wife gives him fits il he loses and
confscates the proceeds II he wins
Louisville Courier.Journal.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05
The Mean Thino.

why are you mad at herY
II met her on the car today, and sh,
i'ald. oh, let me pay your fareg and I
laid. oh. you mustn't and she didn't"
+ Houston Post.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05

The blessedness or misery of old age
is often but the extract OF our past
life.-De Maistre.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05

Despotism may govern without faith.
but liberty cannot. Tocqueyile.
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-10-05

;es and
harness
he best
n to be
e. We
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
PIERCE co. TROUBLES.
Bradley Contracting Company Not
Concerned an Failure.

Representatives Of the John Peirce Company
and William Bradley & Son Uncorporated}. the
general contracting concerns that went into the
hands Of a receiver on Thursday. said Yesterday
that the companies were perfectly solvent. The
application for receiver it was said. made
on the suggestion of persons immediately con
nectcd with the companies.
There will be no haste in accounting the liza
blities and assets Of the concerns for it is the
general opinion Of the officers of the companies
that Il IS largely a private matter. and as soon
as the affairs are narshalled and the outstand-
ing bills paid an application will be n.'de for
the discharge Of the receivershp
Because Of the similarity OF the names Of the
two contracting concerns Of William Bradley &
Son and the Bradley Contracting Company, the
officers OF the latter corporation We're caused
much annoyance by the publication yesterday
OF the details Of the court proceedings which re
suited in the appointment of a receiver for the
corporation William Bradley & Son The cor
poration Bradley Contracting Company Is In no
financial difficulty and is not in any way con-
cerned in the proceedings which led to the ap-
poiutment OF a receiver for the John Peirce Com
pany and William Bradley & Son
Work on the contracts in execution by the
John Peirce Company and William Bradley d
Son was going on as usual YESTERDAY There
will be no let-up in the completion of any con-
tracts held by the companies.
Six mechanics liens, agEregating $23.2so, were
filed Yesterday against the John Peirce Com
panv. on property at 42d street and Vanderbilt
avenue Depew place and 44th street. lexington
avenue and 10th street. and No 90 West street
b,- dealers in building materials, for supplies
etc Among the largest claims are: The Ma
tional Freproofng Company $l1Soo the White
t,jreproof Construction Company. s9,6so, Robert
+ Nackay 1910.
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
F1T4L TEXAS TORN4DOES
Tzco To7cns Nearly Wiped Ont
Train BIO7cn from Bridge.

Fort Worth. Tex. June lin tornado al
Leuders Tex. one hundred miles west OF fort
Worth last night. four persons were killed TWO
others were seriously hurt thirteen houses were
wrecked and scores of cattle were killed An
other tornado almost destroyed the little town
of Hamlin. in Central Western Texas lhree
persons were seriously injured,
In q terrific windstorm last night a Kansas
CITY Mexico & orient passenger train was
blown from the bridge across the Brazos River
between Knox city and benjamin, Tex J. +.
Stafford Of CroweII Tex a passenger. was
killed Several persons were injured Cloud
bursts occurred In sections west Of Fort worth
last night killing az least one person and IN
turing scores of others
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
MICHIGAN LEADS Glass.
Speed of Nezc Battleship SAID To BE
Remarkable.

Proyincetown Mass. June 1.-THE general
showing of the battleship Michigan in the tests
thus far made preparatory to her acceptance by
the government Is believed TO constitute more
remarkable performance than that Of any bat
tleship of her size and power ever built. This
statement comes from unofficial source. fol-
lowing the arrival of the Michigan at the outer
harbor to-day at the close of the four hours
high speed tests at sea. which were begun off
Rockland Me. Yesterday.
While this statement based largely
the top speed run Of 2O.O1 knots. made
Wednesday. when the Michigan covered the
mile course at that rate, the showing on four
hours run was sufficient to bear it out. The
highest speed attained IN the four hours run,
unofficial was 1850 knots while the average
was 1895 knots These figures compare with
the official figures of Wednesdays tests of 20.01
for highest speed and 1876 for an average.
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
FAST ST. LOUIS MEAT INSPECTION
Department of Agriculture Orders 1nvestiga
ton of Charges Made by Harms

Washington June 1.-THE Department of AgTi-
c,ltura to-day promptly accepted the challenge o'
+ Harms a government meat inspector at -
o,,is who In rendering his resignation 10 SccIe-
,,r, Wilson made serious charges against the meat
toc-io-,, system al the National Stock Yards. In
r-ast - Louis and demanded an inquiry An
,,,,roadiata and thorough investigation INTO MI
IIo r,,s.s cha r4s was ordered to-day ana to that
e,d two government inspectors have been ordered
.boro when they have completed their lnFestiga-
.i the facts will he reported TO Secretary wilson
,,o &c a. his home in Traer, Iowa, but VIII return
here nrxt Tuesday
-~b. letter of Harms making the charges ana de-
,,an5ing an Investigation has been received bnt
"a. resjrration has not yet arrived 1t was Saiu'
,,,,,,.,er that il will he accepted
An od1clal statement summarizing the WORK OF
.bo r,oat inspection force at the National STOCK
y,-ls AZ East St Louis. for 1908. was given OUT
a, The Department of Agriculture to-day II shows
tbat the number Of cattle passed on pos'-in"fte"i
,-,ec,ton was 5196 649: calves 9O,S84 sheep 49o-
A25 goats 4054 and swine. l.2f ''4'"- Inc mum
bor ~ animals condemned on post-inor'em ilSpee-
49,, ogoregated 1854 II shown that total OF
931 Aoo8l9 pounds of meat food products was pre-
a-ed and the amount of such products condemned
IN retnspection was 252s72 pounds.
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
SENIOR PAUL OUSTED.
Tene1ueId RemOJesE Enroy, OzciHg to
His 4ppeal to -1mericd.

Caracas. June 1.-THE Venezuelan govern
ment sent a dispatch to-day to Sefor Paul re-
moving him from the diplomatic service on the
ground that the calling of American warships
to La Guayra insult to the dignity Of
the country.
This action followed uproar I'm Congress
yesterday. when joint resolution was passed
refusing to approve a part Of the Yellow Book
which dealt with the call sent December u
by the Foreign Minister. jose de J. Paul for
American warships. Heated speeches were
made demanding the removal Of Senior Paul
from his post of special envoy to Europe to set
tie outstanding difficulties between several of
the powers and Venezuela.
Congressman Galegos. in speaking of Senor
Paul to-day, said: The people curse him be
cause he sent the cable dispatch for warships.
which was the first step toward foreign inter
vention in Venezuelan affairs
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12

Little Boy Host Is Tossed and
DRAGGED by Machine.

Jimmie" McAfahon. eight years old. OF No. la5
West 27th street was over by an automo-
bile in front Of MS home last night Although
he fell directly under the machine Jimmie"
vas not seriously injured The machine was
owned, and driven by William Deforrest. Of No,
80 President street. Brooklyn. and with him al
the time was Mrs Deforrest.
Last night Jimmie" To have had PARTY
n his house and he and his small companions
had been busy running across the street and
hack to the house again, intent ou getting the
aats'' as he expressed II. While carrying one
~ these parcels TO the party the red auto came
down the street The boy intent on eX-
a-ninirg the dclicacies within the box and did
not see the machine until he fell under the
wheels.
Mr. Deforrest applied the brakes. but
..1i,,,r,ies' clothing caught in the running gear
o-d he was dragged for twenty feet. With the
assistance Of the boys friends. Mr Deforrest
soon extricated Jimmie" and carried him to a
drug store. Dr. Mcclure Of the New York Hos
,,+a, took him to that institution. The boy
,,e,,e- ,ybimpered though suffering from many
g..rtusions. which panied him exceedingly When
,,o had beer comfortably attended TO "JimTies'
father was permitted to see him He refused to
make a complaint against Mr. Deforrest when
..r,,,r,ie" explained that It was "a very nice
NM, and lady who ran over him.
There was no party at the Mcmahon home
last night but there VIII be one when Jimmie
,t-alI
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
MOTHER SEES CHILD's DEATH DROP.
Little Girl Hangs from Fire Escape Before
Falling Sixty Feet.

After clinqing for minute 70 the bottom Of the
fire escape in the rear tenement house On the sixth
eoor of No 10 East f33d street fourye yearold Alice
chisholm who had fallen over the railing while
tr,ing to catch her doll lost her hold and fell TO
tho ground a distance Of sixty feet. breaking
every bone in her body, last night,
Her sister Elizabeth thirteen years old, held her
=, ~. air for few seconds after Alice had re-
leased her grasp upon the iron bars. but was
forced to le. go. The mother of the children.
,ro other side Of the window the danger. and
tried frantically TO open the window. which had
~, o,ben Elizabeth had scrambled through The
,..,,,y could not be budged until 1t was too late
TIL. mother was forced TO stand. speechless with
,,,r-or knowing that she alone could the lit
,Ia one from death Seeing the elder child slowly
eI.se her grip upon the dress of the younger, she
time TO save the elder child from plunging after
her sister.
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
GRANTS CITY RIGHT TO SUE,
Decision Affects Responsibility for Accidents
IN Structures Under Permit.

The Appellate Division of the Supreme cour,, IN
-, -. . Henry Corn. a builder, handed down
a. nportant decision fixing the responsibility OF
,bs municipality for accidents on structures built
under official permit.
corn erected temporary bridge over the slde-
N. =. u,ub Avenue and 18th street in 1902 Many
W. .ha-ad on this bridge to see a parade.
peP - - cIIansed and William J. Coolidge
- tI,s heirs sued the city and recovered
judgment. which paid The corporation coun-
sci 0Ie" ,i.h ,ras denied The request
$50 - the Appellate Division. The latter said
in an opinion: . >, -,
consent by municipal corporation TO do law
eul act merely permits IT to be dohe IN eareIul'
- -. o,a lawful manner. and when Il is per-
s,aa IN snv other way and an injury 10 third
..aDas rises tie author OF the injury is liable
therefor
New-York tribune., 1909-06-12
BAILEY ON RURAL LIFE.
Wants Rich Farmers to Remain on Their
Land

Buffalo. June 1.-THE welfare of the rural COM
munties. juvenile courts and their value as a re-
form agency. the prevention of blindness and child
insurance were among the many subjects taken
up at the conference of charities and correction
here to-day After good natured all-day battle
by Pittsburg, Denver and ST. Louis Tor next year
convention the committee this afternoon decided in
favor of St Louis
Professor L. II. Bailey. OF Cornell University.
who was chairman of President Roosevelts Coun-
try Life Commission. spoke at the evening session
on Rural Communities.
I'VE need 10 develop such rural civilization
will satisfy farming people TO remain the farm
as place of abode even after the man has derived
a competence from the land said Professor Bailey.
Among the methods Of bringing this about the
speaker suggested among other things: Dividing up
the large farms. cooperation and organization
among country people establishment OF factories
and industries in the open country. and the devel
ournent Of good Iocal Institutions such schools.
church libraries etc, and the extension of all
kinds of quick communication