Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-02


! The Poet-Poets are born, not made.
The Girl know. I wasn't blaming
you.--Boston Transcript.
Knicker--Why did you ride with
such a reckless chauffeur? Booker
To keep from being run over-New
York Sun.
What is the meaning of the word
lukewarm'?" asked the teacher WA
ter is lukewarm when 1t looks warm
and isn't"
How did Tom manage to get so
much of his uncles estate?" He
married his lawyers only daughter
Boston Globe.
Robbie said the visitor, have
you any little brothers and sisters?"
No" replied wee Robbie; I'm all the
children we've got"
He Gust rejected)-I shall never
marry now. She-Foolish man! Why
not? He-If you won't have me, who
will?-Boston Transcript.
Has she been in society very
to be a positive effort for her to be
rude. Cleveland Leader.
Office Boy--Heres a lady what In
sists on seem you'll She's awful ex.
! cited! Editor-Then escort her to the
composing room, you idiot!
Watchful Mother-Beryl. are young
Mr. Ketchley's intentions serious?
Charming Daughter-They are, but he
doesn't know 1t yet-Chicago Trib-
une.
| Farmer Hayrick-Why are you go
| Ing to charge the summer boarders
more this year? Farmer Corntassel-
We've called the place bungalow
! Puck
What are you so downcast over?
Worrying about buslness?" "Oh, no."
Yet you seem troubled" We'll, I'm
reading continued stories in six maya
zines"
Mrs B.-If / should die, would you
ever forget me? MIR. b think not.
The doctor said that will suffer from
dyspepsia all my life,-Kansas City
Journal.
Hubby--What! You paid fifty dol
larys for that imported hat? It's
monstrous-its a sin! Wife (sweet-
ly)-No matter; the sin will be on
my head!
Chappie-That fellow over there
cheated me out of cool million.
Clubleigh-How could he? Chappie-
Wouldn't let me marry his daughterl
The Club Fellow.
The Dear Grille had the impu-
dence to ask me for a kissl Her Dear
Friend-The idea! What cheekl The
Dear Girl (blushlng) He wasn't par
ticular which.-Judge.
Chum--Why don't you assert your
authority as head OF the family, and
take matters In your own hands?
Head OF the House (mournfully) My
wife won't let me-Baltimore Ameri-
can.
Mabel don't believe you really
meant 1t when you said you were
anxious to hear me sing Sam--Oh.
assure you | did! You see, had
never heard you sing before.-Pick-
Me-Up.
Mrs Jagsby welcoming Mr.. Jagsby
at daybreak) Up all night again, Ell?
Mr. Jagsby-Yes, m dear, thash jush
H. Went up with Misher Wright in
! his airship lash evenin' an he couldn't
| get IL doWuf--pnck
Ellison HalIoa, dear boy, you look
very sad this morning What's the
.rouble7 Green-I've just undergone a
most annoying operation. Ellison
What was it2 Green--I had my allow
ance cut off-Tit-Bits.
The Bachelor Marriage a game OF
nance. The Married Man--And you
nave conscientious scruples against
gambling? The Bachelor~-Not exactly,
but / have against drawing a BOBBY
prize Record.
Pension Inquiry Ohice-Have you
over been IN the hands Of the police?
Applicant Well-er-slr, you see,
used to be a cook Girls will be girls
and he was n sergeant PUCK
Yes my friend. was about to mar
ry the countess when / suddenly
learned that she spent more than
50, 900 marks a year on her dress
maker" Then what did you do?"
Why, married the dressmaker."
ION what ground?" asked the lawyer,
does your wife want a divorce? In
compatibility Something of that
sort / reckon" answered the man.
MY income Isn't compatible with her
IDEAS Of comfort Chicago Tribune.
Near-sighted Guest Cat banquet) i
presume the next thing will be long
and tlresOme speech from some talka-
dive guy. Man Sitting Next-Oh!
suppose so I'm the laxative guy that
aas to make the speech.-Chlcago Tri.