davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
Rheumatism Cured in a Day.

DR.. Detchon's Relief for Rheumatism radi-
cally curesin1to3days Its action is remark
able. 1t removes at once the cause and the
disease Immediately disappears: First dose
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
Roosevelt Visits Gibraltar

Mr.. Roosevelt arrived at Gibraltar
on the Hamburg and got a ducking
while boarding the ship from a small
boat after a trip ashore.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09

Mrs. WinsIow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softensth the gums, reduces iniamma-
ton, allays pain, cures wind collie, 25c. a bottle.
Germany's medical students number
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09

Shepherds and farmers comprise about
one-half Of the population of Greece.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
Piles Cured in 6 TO IA DAYS.

Pazo Ointment is guaranteed to cure any
caseof Itching, Blind, Bleeding OF P~rotruding
Piles in 6 to IA days or money refunded. soc.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
WaShMoA
couSNp0NON

hybspermaneSM Ovsxcoms
by pr0pesvgsOnOeN swuN@sas.
sisnMcsd ne one wSN bsNsScsA
lasGsMs rsmsay, Syrp dEsssE@r
6SsmawNash eNGOes c~OsUSumcsSGs
habits dolly 50 hot osSsstaMsN UanOre
moy be eyOaAGNy dispensed with
when no longer needed, os the 6saS
remeasss wNsNvGQ9Wea Gxe @osssSt
uamce, Onaua TO supPlOa he OdNuA
SuNS6Ous ,w@ahwus depend TN-
mStsAy upon proper N~CUr,Shmsva.
proper Efforts, Ona vSd @1Ns SsnerGyy
bea@b eugSGsAd edS0Moysb buy he 3eunaUGy
nANOrAerOseo e~ n-c
CALIFORNIA
FIG SYRUP Co.
SOLD BY ALL ID DRUGGISTS
ONE SIZE ONLY REGULAR PRICE sos PER eorTE
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
Dearth of Great Actresses.

Although actingis essentially a fem
mime art, Englishwomen are making
far less mark in it at the present time
than in probably any other period of
our theatrical history. We have no
Mrs. Siddons.-London Tatler.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
DIR. ELIOT DECLINES EMBASSY.


President of Harvard VIII Not Accept
Mission to England.
Washington, D. C.-Both at the
State Department and the White
House it was officially announced that
DR.. Charles w. Eliot, the retiring
president of Harvard University, had
definitely and finally decided that he
could not accept the tender of the
Ambassadorship to Great Britain.
President Taft is considering no
one for the place at this time, as no
change is contemplated for some time
to come.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09

The British Postofice Savings Bank ha
over 10000, 900 depositors.
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09

Roller skates we're invented by Plymr
ton in 1863. -
The Penn's Grove record., 1909-04-09
The Great Circus.

color moro goods brighter and raster colors
IAN dye any garment without ripping aps
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
MORE TROUBLE Fok TURKEY.

Owing to the disturbed conditions at
Constantinople, the Turks of Asia
IiinOr are said to be massacring the
Armenians and the Christian commune
ties Of Messina are said to be appealing
to their consuls for help. The bitter and
undying hatred existing between the
Moslems and the Armenians consti-
tutes the greatest danger to the Otto
man empire. 1t has existed ever since
the MOhammedans placed the yoke
upon the necks Of the Christians in the
east, and will probably continue until
Armenia is wrested from the Turk.
In the present case the trouble was
caused by the murder of a MosIem by
an Armenian, and the fact that the as
sassin was not apprehended, but any
excuse serves as an excuse for the
breaking out Of hostilities. It is prob
able that the Armenians are equally
blamable with the Turks, but their ap-
peal to Christian civilization will in
flame and prejudice the minds of the
followers Of the cross against the ad-
herents Of the waning crescent, and
the complications existing in Turkey
at the present time viii be intensified.
The outlook for the sultan is growing
darker each day, and changes I'm the
maps of both Europe and Asia may be
close at hand.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
FNeLAND's FEAR OF INVASION.

The London Daily Mail has compiled
a map showing the dates of fifty-four
invasions Of Great Britain, from the
time of the landing of William the Con-
queror in the year of our Lord 1866. In
great part, the so-called ''invasiOns"
we're mere demonstrations, like that of
Paul Jones off the coast of Scotland
during the revolutionary war, and many
of them ended disastrously to the in
vader. Nevertheless. the excitement in
the empire upon which the sun never
sets continues, and the building of big
battleships is being rushed with fever
ish haste lest the Germans catch their
British brothers unawares and come
over in bigger battieships and annex
the islands to the Teutonic empire.
The rivalry in naval matters which
is sure TO bankrupt the countries en-.
gagged in it seems extremely foolish.
and some of the English people them
selves are trying to turn the tide of
public opinion in the other direction.
But il is uphill work. The craze is. on.
and the man who stands out from the
fear-inspired throng is at once branded
a Little Highlander" one who has not
the welfare of his country at heart.
At The Hague peace conference fu-
;ile attempt was made to have the pow
ers come to some agreement regard
ing the building Of warships, but the
time was not ripe, and it probably will
require war between two or more
first-ciass powers, when many of the
powerful engines Of destruction on the
ocean viii be sent to the bottom. car
rying with them the lives of thousands
of cOmbatants. Then. when the conflict
is over, and the hundreds of millions
Of dollars invested in warships have
gone beyond recall. it viii be time to
talk to Germany about the Limitation of
ornaments. Concerning such limita-
ton, the London Illustrated News re-
Gently published the following article
from the pen of G. X. Chesterson:
II is all nonsense to say that We Euro
seans could not have an agreement about
disarmament We could have il right
enough if we were Europeans. We could
have 1t well enough If we loved our civ
lliZauOn much as We hate each other
People cannot love Europe, because Eu-
rope Is either map or else mythical
lady who was carried off by a bull But
men could love Christendom. because il
was an idea
Therefore. with all the hesrtiness prop
ct 10 enc who Is wholly ignorant of the
subject, I throw down my two private
doubts, which are almost strong enough
TO be called suggestions. First I graveIv
doubt whether our hurried emulation in
arms is not a great deal too much a mere
Dreathless and crazy copying. II the 9TH
er schoOlboy throws big snowbaTls. il is
the mere instinct of hurry 10 throw big
ger ones; but il might be much better
strategy to keep ones head. to throw a
smaller SNOWFALL and to throw il straight
In short, I disbeiieve in this modern war
exactly because II is always talked of
as war of guns and ships. and never
as war Of men. And secondly. doubt
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

Jersey for the purpose of supplying the
staff Of life 10 Greater New York,
claims TO be able to supply the market
for some time without advancing the
price, and has this to say concerning
the wheat corner:
IF there is one crime on the calendar
worse than another. it is the cornering
in favor of the most stringent Iegisla-
ton against il. That the wheat market
Is being and has for someotime been
manipulated is known, but it should
not be. The poor people are those who
suffer, and 1 will cheerfully lead any
movement to punish those who run the
prices of foOdstuffs up unnecessarily.
Il am happy to say that in spite of
the rise in wheat prices the Ward in
terests will not be compelled to raise
rates on bread entering New York.
Fearing a squeeze in wheat, we got
enough wheat last December to run US
quite a while"
If the Ward company controls wheat
enough to enable it to keep bread
prices down, it is fortunate, indeed. The
other bakers in New York have made
no such provision and, consequently.
Will be forced to the wall unless they
are allowed 10 make their loaves small
er, which is another way Of raising the
price. The rest of the country is Ger
tain to feel the pinch in any event
The effects of the panic of 1907 are
still being felt, and this latest Squeeze"
viii work untold hardship upon the
poor. many thousands of whom have
been without work during the dreary
winter months.
The great and manifold blessings of
the tariff, as applied to wheat, are not
discernible to the naked eye at this
distance from the seat OF government.
1t is a comfort to know, however, that
an additional duty has been put on rice,
another article of food used in immense
quantities by the poorer classes, and
that the Louisiana planters are going
to be benefited as well as the wheat
gamblers.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
hRRoR DAY oesERvEo.

Arbor day was generally observed in
Utah and Salt Lake. From the gov
ernor down TO the humblest citizen the
people entered upon the work Of plant
ing trees with a zeal and zest which
promises well for the future of this
great commonwealth. The setting
apart of a day each year was a mag
nificent thought, and the manner in
which il is being utilized will prove of
untold benefit TO generations yet an
born. The pioneers Of Utah were i'm
bued with the same spirit, and the
groves and orchards now fiourishing in
this great valley are a standing monu-
ment 10 their conception Of the needs
and comfort of those who were TO fol-
low them. Let US emulate their exam
pie and each succeeding year will bear
testimony that we of this day and gen
Grafton have an equal regard for the
common good and for the welfare Of
posterity. Plant trees
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
A GENIAL CROWD.

Recently at a dinner party the con-
Versation turned upon the subject of
clubs. The special features of the
Athenaeum We're referred to with great
respect, and then J. NJ. Barrie. who
was the only member of that august
club who happened to be present. in
teTvened:
After having been elected by the
Athenaeum club he said Il went
there for the first time and looked
around for the smoking room. An old
man, with long. white hair, was wan
dering in a lonely way about the hall.
1 asked him if ne would be so kind as
to tell me the way to the smoking
room. He agreed with alacrity. When
we returned to the hall 1 thanked him
heartily, when ne begged me to do him
the honor of dining with him. But,
my dear sir I said, you have been far
too kind TO me already. I cannot think
of imposing myself upon you in this
fashion
Imposing yourself exclaimed the
old man in an eager voice. on the
contrary, you will be doing me the
greatest favor in the world, the fact is.
l have belonged to this club for thirty
years, and you are the first member
who has ever spoken to me.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

and blow on his ungiOved fingers to
keen them from freezing.
The truth is that ne and his negroes
cut the wood and he often sent one of
them to the city with a load to sell
to the families Of Mr.. Blow and a Mr.
Bernard Mr.. Bernard was the brother
Of my brother Johns wife. During the
Christmas holidays one winter the
negro who generally drove the team for
Captain Grant, was i'll and there was
no one TO send in his place.
The captains st Louis friends sent
him word that they were out of wood,
and. accordingly. he hitched up his
team of white horses to his big wagon,
loaded on the wood and hauled it to the
city himself He probably hauled sev-
eral loads In this way. / do not know
how many Any other man with the
same temper of spirit and the same lack
Of false pride would have done the
same.
On one Of these trips, as the captain
was driving along seated on his load of
wood, he suddenly came face to face
with General Harvey and his staff The
general. Respondent i'm a new uniform
and gold trimmings. eyed the figure Of
the farmer on the wagon with astonish-
ment. Then he drew in his horse.
Grant stopped his team. and the pair
smiled into each others eyes.
Why, Grant, what in blazes are you
doing?" exclaimed Harvey.
The captain, sitting comfortably atop
his load Of wood with his AK and whip
stock at his side. shifted one muddy
boot across the other and drawled:
We'll. general, I am hauling wood
The thing was so obvious and Grant
so naive that General Harvey and his
staff rOared with laughter. They shook
his hand and jOked with him and final
ly carried him of to dine with them
at the Planters hotel. That is the
true story of Captain Run-dOwn-at-
the-heels Grant peddling wood for pit
lance in the streets
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
TIE LlMIT IN GRAFT.

For real, simon-pure, unadulterated
impudence. commend US TO the county
commissioners of salt Lake county and
the gentlemen who got a present Of
about a. 400 Of taxpayers money from
those same commissioners, and now
refuse 10 refund it.
The commissioners, il will be recalled,
gave this money to the official organ
because the organ needed il, and be-
cause the money came from the tax
payers and not from the commission
ers personally. When Job Lyon, county
attorney. called attention TO the fact
that the donation was in contravention
of the laws of Utah and demanded its
return. the commissioners refused to
refund. So did Hyrum z. Booth.
United States district attorney, presi-
dent Of the organ, and recipient of the
S4,4OO of aims money.
As a sequel, Mr.. Lyon gave notice Of
his intention to bring suit for the re-
covery Of the money, and the commits
sioners promptly retained the law firm
Of which Hyrum is a member, TO de-
fend the suit That is to say. Booth is
70 be paid by the county for defendir ?
his own possession of taxpayers money
paid TO him without warrant of law
Whoever wins the case. Booth is ahead
of the game, eatchin' 'em 'gwine and
comm as it were.
If any sure-thing man ever got up q
game equal to that for d cinch. it has
not been published in the annals OF
graft. The taxpayer is robbed, and
then the receiver of the goods exacts
a fee for refusing TO give UP his il
iicit plumber. Loaded dice, marked
cards and cold decks all seem trivial
devices of innocent minds in compari-
son with this master stroke of the
county commissioners and their pals.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
roRNER IN WHEAT.

James A. Patten denies that ne has
cornered the wheat market; he simply
backed his belief that the supply was
on longer equal to the demand with his
money. and others followed suit. The
assertion Of the leader of the bull
clique in Chicago is given for what it
IS worth. In the meantime, the price Of
wheat has been advancing by leaps and
bounds, and -four has been placed in
the luxury class. Prices of the neces-
saries of life have been abnormaIly
high, and steadily increasing for some
years past. and the rise in wheat and
-four caps tie climax.
The government report on the con-
ditiOn Of winter wheat is unfavorable
and. in addition. the spectators are
busy asserting that the crop Of spring
wheat will be short, thus aggravating
existing conditions. This first govern
ment report on winter wheat may not
prove to be reliable. and seeding has
just begun in the spring wheat sections
Of the country. but the grain gam
blers are in full cry that the worst is
yet to come. and the miTlers have taken
alarm. Yesterday -four was advanced
80 cents a barrel on the Pacific coast,
which makes the price S1.50 higher than
at the beginning Of the year. All over
the country the story is the same.
Naturally. the bakers are next in line,
aid bread will follow wheat and -four
The days of cheap wheat are over"
cheerfully chirrups Mr.. Patten, who is
Tong" many millions of bushels. That
being accepted as gospel truth, it nat
urally follows that the days OF the )
cent loaf are numbered. r. B. Ward,
president of the new 100000 bread
company recently incorporated in New
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
ALFALFA MUFFINs.
Boston Transcriptl


NebuchadnezzaT at grass, but though
d king, his example has not proved
popular with civilized humans during
all the intervening centuries up to the
present time. But the National Alfalfa
Billers' association, on the roOf-garden
of ., Kansas City hotel the other night
returned to a diet that had some points
in common with that TO which the
BabylOnian monarch was reduced. They
did not, like him, take it au nsturel
They ate alfalfa, that wonderful forage
crop of the west made into mullins. and
prOfessed greatly to enjoy it. First
however, the dried alfalfa was ground
into a fine green meal then kneaded
into dough and seasoned and baked like
the graham gem. There were two at
each plate; one to eat. and one to take
home as a. souvenir; but so relishable
did most Of them find the new delicacy
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
TREE SHOCKS A PLAYWRIGHT.

That Beerbohm Tree. the player. has
a caustic wit. is evidenced by an Incl
dent wherein he and an unknown play
wright figured
The writer had obtained permission
to read his Offering to Tree. The actor
evinced no great degree of enthusiasm.
either during or after the reading. but
he did take the manuscript, upon which
he scrubbed hastily a few suggestions
for its betterment.
''See here" Mr. TTeee." was the in
dignant ejaculation of the ambitious
playwright, its hardly fair of you to
dispose Of my work in this summary
and nonchalant fashion. I'd have you
know that this play cost me a years
hard LABOR"
SOP" queTied Tree. My dear fell
low, any impartial judge would give
YOU at least FIVE"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
AMBIGUITY is DANGEROUS.
Cleveland Leader }

The simplest proposition" said Sen
ator Beveridge. in a recent address,
must be set out with the utmost care
in the wording. or misunderstanding
dissent. even anger, may result.
Thus, as a train was moving forth
from a Cincinnati station, man stuck
his head far out Of the window.
Keep your head in there. a station
will be knocked off,
Knocked OFF, shouted the passen-
ger. Knocked off. eh?. Well, il won [
be knocked off by anybody the size Of
you. you bandy-leCZed shrimp
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

that they ate their souvenirs The
leaves from which the new -four is made
are said to contain p per cent Of pro-
tein and per cent of fat So husks
and grass need no longer mean the eX-
IRENE of restitution that they did In
scriptural times, especially as upon the
irrigated lands of the west four crops in
a season are not an infrequent yield.
The yellow flour which the millers' COM
bine has decreed shall be substituted
for the white may now be varied with
the green flour of the great new west.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
CONFESSIONS OF PHYSICIANS.
philadelphia Press.)

I often wonder" said DR.. jay F.
Schemberg at a recent meeting of the
Philadelphia County Medical society,
how many of our cures are psycholo-
gicGl. Some time ago ! had a patient
with a severe case OF eczema. I sent
her TO another physician to take sea
water treatment 1 kept her under in
spection, seeing her twice q week. I'm
mediately she began telling me how
much the sea water was helping her.
She said she was getting better every
day, and yet the eczema kept getting
worse. so fareas 1 could see, and I could
see that she was scratching IL more all
the time
Il have a better one than that" re-
Joined DR. G. Z. de NJ. Sajous. "A man
brought his daughter to me for treat
ment. She had lost her voice. l tried
the battery on her, and her voice re
turned perfectly in a short time. The
father was in such glee that he Rugged
me. When they had gone / happened
to look at the battery and saw that the
current had not been turned on"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
AN ARTLEss CRITICISM OF ART.

Signor Caruso, the great opera sing
ct. tells OF a lady's maids artless criti-
cism of an amateur singer. whose
methods were of the strained order
The maid was brushing her mistress
hair. when she mentioned that she had
heard Miss Evans sing in the parlor
the night before.
And how did you like il? asked the
mistress
.'Oh. mum" answered the maid. 1T
wuz beautiful She sung just as if she
WIZ carglingt"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
HE LOGIC OF FACTS.
CKansas - Sal

r P McCulloch tells of a Harper
county farmer who lives near a Tail-
road and close by a whistling station.
who one day. wishing to get letter of
somewhere, rushed out on the track.
frartically waved his cap and stopped
the train. He went to the mail car and
put his letter in the slot. The con-
ductor saw him about that time and
said: Look here. don't you know you
can't stop this train?''
The farmer replied: We'll. by gum,
I did stop II %
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
THESE PAUsEs NOT PAINFUL
NCIeNeland Leader.l

AOleNGldilQ I1edQeE.J
Dr.. p. s. Henson once delivered his
lecture on Fools at the New York
Chsutauqua. In introducing him, Bish-
op Vincent said;
Ladies and gentlemen. we are now
to listen to a lecture on Fools by one
Cthe audience broke into "a roa~ of
laughter, and after it had died away
Bishop Vincent added of the most
brilliant men in America"
DR.. Henson rose and with a genial
smile said: Ladies and gentlemen,
am not so great a fool as Bishop Vim
cent" (another roar of laughter. after
which the speaker added would have
YOU believe"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
GENERAL GRANTS EARLY DAYS,

Mrs. Emma Dent Casey. writing in the
February Circle magazine Of her MEM
Dries Of General Grant, refutes some
rem.
There is the famous story OF Captain
Grant living in such poverty that he
had to haul his poor little fagOts OF
wood through the city with an OK team
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
A RINGING CALL.
youths Companion.)

The Rev. Mr.. Spicer had for three
days enjoyed the telephone which had
been his last gift from an admiring
parishiOner. He had been using il I'M
mediateiy before going to church.
When the time came for him to an
nounce the first hymn. he rose. and with
his usual impressive manner read the
words. Then. in a crisp. firm tone. he
said: Let US all unite in hymn six dos-
bic o. ring three
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16
Total Copies Of The Herald Printed
In March. 1909.

@%&%4@% +%@~F~ -
> largest Daily and Sunday cir '
> sulation in Salt Lake proved by =
= investigation.
= = = y b = = = = = = = = y , =
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

whether this competition Of longer spears
or larger ships need go on at all, if once
the nations could find something positive
Upon which TO combine.
Those who have doubts regarding the
possibility Of limiting ornaments by
international agreement generally con-
elude their arguments by quoting that
we shall have wars and rumors OF
wars" to the end of the chapter. Yet,
above the din and clatter. the noise and
confusion caused by mere rumors and
the smoke and havoc Of actual conflict
there are millions of people who can
hear once more the voice of the Master
say, Peace"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

Mrs. George H Wood wishes to an
nounce the removal Of her Wade Cor
set DarlOrs to her own home. $50 East
Third South. Both phones 202.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

President Taft has fired a message on
congress on the Philippine tariff ques-
words in behalf Of the American con-
sumer that patient individual would
be on par with his dusky brother in
the Orient
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-04-16

The Qualification OF Joan of Arc will
be completed next Sunday at Rome and,
commencing today, the Maid of Orleans
may be publicly venerated. The next
step wilabe canonization. which may
not occur for some time. France needs
a whole calendar of saints just at pres
emf