davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

It angered the bee and the MOSQUITO
and at the same moment that the
mosquito angrily bit him on the right
ear the bee arose in its might and
swatted its singer into his left ear
up to the handle.
1t was Immediately after that-with-
in one-tenth of secondhand Uncle
Ashdod saw where great improve.
ment could be made in bees and mos
puitos. -
So, as soon as he got home, he set
to work thinking how to improve the
bee and the mosquito, and the more
he thought about it the surer he be-
came that life was too short for one
man to improve both separately and
that the right thing to do would be to
mix the breeds of bees and mos
Quitos. He said that the only OBJ
dectfonable part of the bee was its
after-deck and rudder, so to speak,
and that the mean part of the mos
quito was its fore-deck and bowsprit,
and what the world had been longing
for these many centuries was a COM
bination Of the fore-end of the bee and
the rear-end Of the mosquito, thus
forming one sweet and useful insect
About that time a bald-headed man
from Chicago came to Betzville to get
material for History of the Promi-
nent Citizens Of Ringtail County"
the cost Of the book being only ten
dollars, including the insertion Of a
handmade biography Of the purchaser
10 one Of the most prominent Of all,
and SIS additional for a steel engrav-
ing with adrm but gentle look. He
strongly urged Uncle Ashdod to fall
tor Il, saying that Uncle Ashdod had
9 bunch Of the most biographical look
ing whiskers IN MI Ringtail county,
and thst now was the time to be steel
engraved. before the price Of steel
won't up. Bat Uncle Ashdod. babe him
watt He told the man from Chicago.
that hs would gladly uplilt Amer
lean literatnfs b contributing lii face
and biography. but that he would not
- re1dy until shout potato-digging.
time. The fast W. that Uncle An.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
HABITS CHAIN
Certain Habits UnconsciousIy Formed
and Hard to Break,

An ingenious philosopher estimates
that the amount Of will power neces-
sary to break lifelong habit would.
If it could be transformed. lift weight
of many tons.
1t sometimes requires higher de.
gree of heroism to break the chains Of
pernicious habit than to lead for
lorn hope In bloody battle. A lady
writes from an Indiana town:
From my earliest childhood was
lover of coffee. Before was out Of my
teens I was a miserable dyspeptic. suf.
fering terribly at times with my stom.
och.
Il was convinced that It was coffee
that was causing the trouble and vet
could not deny myself q Gun for
breakfast. At the age Of SO I was in
very poor health. indeed. NY sister
told me was in danger Of becomin.
q coffee drunkard.
But ] never could give up drinkine
coffee for breakfast, although II kent
me constantly III. until I tried Postum.
I learned to make It properly according
to directions. and now We can hardly
do without Postum for breakfast. "a
care nothing for coffee.
I am no longer troubled WITH IN.
pepsia, do not have spells of sufHerinx
with my stomach that used % truuh,o
NE % when I drank cofeee.
Il LOok IA plgs. Tor the litt1e hooa -
Road 70 Wallyiile. q Thsrora llsanonl. =
N : ~ -
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

had got the wrong ends of them. Each
bisquito had bees singer on its
nose and mosquitoes bitter on it's tail
and they were ambidextrous, as one
might say. They worked something
like see-saw. A bisquito could bal
ance on its legs on a tender SPOT, and
then see-saw up and down, and al
each teeter the singer on one end
would do its dire work. By the time
Uncle Ashdod reached the attic door
the whole production of his bisuuito
factory was showing him how it was
done.
Uncle Ashdod was seen passing
through Main street sat about $3.50
o'clock accompanied by all the bis
qditos known to be in existence. and
he was on the jump, and at every
jump he let forth a yell, but at the
speed at which he was travelling the
reporter of the Betzville News could
not tell whether it was yell of tri.
umph or mere expression of annoy
ance. It was later learned that he
had no thought at the time of ex-
pressing his triumph, but was simply
hiking for the swimming hole in the
creek.
Three days later the biographer
from Chicago found him there with
only his nose above water while sew
eral hundred bisquitos sat patiently
on log near by. Occasionally bis
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Stated in Cold Figures.

1t costs on an average about $3.50
to cure an incipient consumptive or
to care for an advanced case of tuber.
culosis until death. If he is left in des.
titute circumstances without proper
attention he will surely infect with
his disease at least two other persons,
and possibly more. Considering that
the average life is worth to society
in dollars and cents about $1,000, the
net loss which would accrue to a com.
munity by not treating it's poor con.
sumptives in proper institutions would
be, for each case, including those who
are unnecessarily infected, at the very
lowest figure, s4,25O. On this basis, il
the poor consumptives in the United
States who are now sick were segre.
gated from their families, and either
kept in institutions until they died, or
else cured of their disease, the saw
ing to the country would be the enor
nous sum of s1,275,OO0,0OO.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Lurton For Supreme Court.

Washington.-The president has
sent to the senate the nomination
of Horace H. Lurton, of Tennessee to
be an associate justice of the supreme
court of the United States.
Judge Lurton is a Tennessee man
and was appointed Judge of the Sixth
circuit by President Cleveland, March
a., 1893. He was democrat in pol
itics at that time.
President Taft was himself a Judge
IF the Sixth circuit at the time he was
appointed governor of the PHILIPPINES
in 1898.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
MEN 10 LIVE 100 s u YEARS :iliil'i;
Rev. Newell Dwight Hiills In Chicago
Lecture, Forssses Human Long.
evity-Advocats Suffrage:

Chicago. That man may by his owl
methods Of living sustain life until
he reaches the age of 100, or even
12O years, is the contention of Rev. DR..
Newell Dwight Hills, pastor of Ply.
mouth church, Brooklyn, N. Y.
DR.. Hills arrived in Chicago in tn.
course of lecture tour which carried
him through the middle west. bring.
ing with him the excellent good news
that the time is near at hand when
we will "all be ashamed to show our
faces in heaven before we are 1OC
years old" DR.. Hills is convinced
that present day conditions are such
rs to make for the longevity Of the
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
oLEo MAN FOR CONGRESS
Sixth illinois District Voters choosi
Monkey to Fill Lorimer's
Place.

Chicago.-Unless the plans of one o,
defeated opponents succeed an cleo
margarine manufacturer will represent
the Sixth Chicago district in congress
This manufacturer of substitute 70,
butter is William ]. Moxley and he
was elected after a hard campaign
So far as the records show he is the
only oleo maker in congress. The
government has had considerable trou
BILE with men in Mr.. Monkeys business
and Chicago paper which opposed
his election called attention to the
fact that Mr.. Monkey had not been
without his own clash with Uncle
Sam.
Mr.. Moxley was elected to succeed
William T Orir,oo,s 1ryh0 x,oc alo1oko5 a.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Meats Not Often Served.

There are several parts of the ami
NAL which few people serve that are
entirely wholesome and may be pre-
pared in most attractive manner
viz: brains, kidneys, tripe and OK
tails.
Soak in cold water, remove all the
red membrane. Put them into a pint
Of cold water with a tablespoonful OF
lemon juice or vinegar. Boil ten min
utes, then plunge into cold water
Serve in drawn butter sauce with
lemon and parsley or chopped onion
added to rich white sauce.
Lambs Kidneys.
Split the kidneys in halves length
wise, trim off all the fat and sinews.
Cut into small pieces. Fry one on
ion in two tablespoonfuls of butter,
add the kidneys and cook three min
utes, add one tablespoonful of flour,
one gill of stock or water, gill of
currant jelly, salt and pepper to taste.
Just before serving add enough pow
dered assafoetida to make the amount
the size of a small pea. Serve at
once.
Tripe is the first stomach of the
OK and is considered easy of diges-
ton. Cut it in strips two inches long
by one-half inch in width, having
three cupfuls. Put in a pan and set
in the oven to draw out the water.
Cook one tablespoonful of finely
chopped onion in two tablespoonfuls
of butter until slightly Drowned. Add
the tripe, drained, and cook five min
utes. Sprinkle with salt, pepper and
finely chopped parsley.
Oxtail soup is considered a great
delicacy.
Cut the oxtail in small pieces, wash,
drain, sprinkle with salt, pepper,
dredge with -four and fry in butter
ten minutes. Add six cups of brown
stock, one-half cupful each of carrot
and turnip, cut in fancy shapes, one.
half cup each of onion and celery, cut
in small pieces, the vegetables are all
parboiled before adding to the stock.
Simmer the stock one hour before
adding the vegetables, when they are
soft add one-fourth of cup Of or.
ange juice. one teaspoonful of Wor-
cestershire sauce, and one teaspoon.
FIJI Of lemon juice.
-
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
FEDERATION CONFERENCE.
Called to Consider Sympathetic Rail.
road Strike.

tSo0 StJlNCs
st. Paul.-Delegates from II orga.
nazations embracing the railroad en-
ployee's department of the American
Federation of Labor will meet in the
Twin Cities at 10 O'clock next Satur-
day morning, according to an an
nouncement issued by H. B. Perham,
chairman of that department.
lis this convention expected to is.
sue an ultimatum to the railroads
threatening a general sympathetic
strike in the zone now affected unless
prompt settlement is made with the
switchmen?" Mr. Hawley was asked.
"That will be up to the convention"
he replied, "but I will say that the
meeting has been called for that pur.
pose."
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Tabled and Filed.

Mrs. Crawford-You must love your
husband very dearly if you save all
the letters he sends you while you're
in the country.
Mrs. Crabshaw-I'm keeping them
for comparison, my dear. I'm sure to
catch him in lie.-Judge.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

If the women are to be credited.
every married woman finally dies of
a broken heart, and every old bach.
elor has had his heart buried in q
grave for years.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Precocious.

The little girl was acting naughtily
before company. Her mother warned
her sharply.
IF you do that again, I'll smack
you," she said.
mo you WON'T" replied the pert
daughter. "I'll sit down on myself and
then you can't"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Twin City Markets.

Minneapolis, Dec. 14.-Wheat, Dec,
$1.12h; May, SLIP; No. 1 northern,
$1.13A; No. 2 northern, $1.12A; dur.
UNI, No. 1, 94Ac. Corn-No. 3, 59Nc.
Oats-No. 3 white, 41Hc. Rye-No.
2, 7OAc. Barley-64c. Flax-No. 1,
s1.90A.
Duluth, Dec. IA. No / northern.
s1.1O%; Dec, $1.1oM; May. $1.121s.
South st. Paul, Dec. 14.-Cattle-
Steers, $5.00@6.75; cows, fair, 1925
@425; calves, $3.50@5.5O. Hogs.
$8.05@8.20; sheep, yearlings, $3.50
5.75; lambs, $5.O0@6.6O.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
NE may live in a palace and Y

wv NE may live in palace and yet
not be a. slave to the palace.
Our home should be as beautiful as our
taste and means can make it; but, like
the nest yonder, it should simply serve
its purpose, leaving us the time and
means to get all the good out of the
world that we CAM. p. Roe.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
ACCOUNTING ITCHING.
Eczema for a Year-Got No Relief
Even at Skin HospitaI-ln Despair
Until cuticura Cured Him.

II was troubled with a severe itch
ing and dry. scrufy skin on my ankles,
feet, arms and scalp. Scratching made
1t worse. Thousands of small red PIN.
pies formed and these caused intense
itching. I was advised to go to the
hospital for diseases of the skin. I did
so, the chief surgeon saying: "Inever
saw such bad case of eczema" But I
got little or no relief Then tried many
so-called remedies, but I became so
bad that I almost gave up in despair.
After suffering agonies for twelve
months, was relieved of the almost
unbearable itching after two or three
applications of Cuticura Ointment. ]
continued its use, combined with Cutt
cura Soap and Pills, and I was com.
pletely cured. Henry Searle, Little
Rock, Ark, Oct. and 10, 1907"
Potter Drug 4 Chem. Corp, Sole Props, Boston
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Chicago Live Stock,

Chicago. Dec. 14.-Cattle-Market.
100000 lower; beeves $4@8.6O; Tex
as steers, $3.80@4.75; western steers,
$4.25@7; stockers and feeders, $1,000
$40; cows and heifers, $2.10@5. 1905,
calves. $7@9.50.
Hogs-Market. 10c lower: light, IS
@S45; mixed, $s.05@8.55; heavy,
$s.15@s.60; rough. $s.15@s.s0; good
tc choice. heavy. ;s.so0s.6o; piss.
ts6.9O@7.S5. ss
Sheen Market, 10c lower; native.
s1s00t wsstern. 3ss75 0S.76; year-
Elings. 6.2507.60; lambs. native. S5.75
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
None Better.

What would you recommend as
good mental exercise, professor?"
Fixing your mind on your own
business, my boy"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Method in Their Madness.

"Why do so many otherwise clever
women write silly letters to men?''
They're probably making a collec
ton of the answers they get"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

1t is said that a cat has nine lives
but a cat isn't in 1t with an old COW
when it comes to kicking the bucket.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
Ielk- I~,<..eA-
Tight Wads. :

Warden-H ow's the campaign goina
up your way? Sort Of q close contest!
Sellers (gloomily Closest I eve
saw. Neither side 10 giving up !
blamed cent. .sss
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
r. 3. Dear Dies At Superior.

x. 3. Dear Dies At superior.
Superior.-R: B. Dear, millionaire
contractor and mining man, died here
as the result of:the third operation fol-
lowing appendicitis. Until recently
he was president of the Butte-Balak.
lava Copper Company.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

the rank of senator last spring. He is
wealthy and his friends are certain
that he will give the people of the
Sixth district satisfactory service.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
|U1eKTfGfiFN'


That through our Souls come
thronging,
winch one is ere so dear, so kind
so beautiful as longing?
6ut would we reach life's greatest scope
which we are hourly wronging,
our lives must climb from hope to hope
And realize our longing"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17
OFF DUTY ! / u Z.

Miss Smin-Oh, doctor. do you
know you look perfectly killing this
evening?
Doctor-Thank you, but I am not
I'm of duty, you know.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-12-17

i The man who Il, down a the wos,l
ts the most hard up. 7 "a.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19
CONVENTION PLANS
ARRANGE FOR KNIGHTS OF COL
 UMBUS.
will Re Largest Convention Ever Held in Mobile-Citixen Are En-
 thusiastfc.

Mobile. Mar. 1S.-(Special.) )-Plans for the entertainment of the conven- ton of the Knight of Columbus which will be held in this city beginning the first week In August. were given great impetus at G meeting held in the Battle House last night for the purpose of arranging plans.
 Committees from the local K. O. C.. Commercial Club and Cotton Exchange were present and talked over the plans for entertainment, Mir. Matt Mahorner being made general chairman of the meeting. He explained that the con vention would bring delegates from all over the United States. Mexico and Canada and all agreed that it was one of the largest conventions ever held here.
 Those making addresses at the meet ing which adjourned subject to the call of Chairman Mahorner were E. J Buck, John Craft. A. c. Quina, Dr Angelo Festorrazzi and Chairman Ma horner.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19

ond Street. Rev. Hoyt. the Presby- terian minister, performed the cere- mony which united in rnatrimony the popular young persons. They will re- side in Bay Minette.
 The little daughter of Fred o. Nelson died here yesterday afternoon after a brief illness.
 The Baldwin County Court officials are getting everything ready for the spring term of the circuit court. which convenes here Monday. There are no bad cases on the docket but the usual amount of interest in this biennial court Is being shown.
 The grip of lagrippe Is being broken in this section. It was very popular for several weeks to be laid up with this complaint. but With the opening of spring the disease wasted its terror.
 Gardening In Bay Minette is ahead of anything of the kind at this date in previous years. The, young plants seemed to escape the extreme cold of few weeks ago. and the gardens planted before then are the most ad- vaneed: No one has had to plant over so far as learned today.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19
DRINK PLENTY '+. :. GOOD WATER Advice and a Simple
 Prescription. A LOCAL DRUGGIST TALKS Tells How to Make Right a
 Home a Splendid Success For Stomach Trouble. Kidney sad Blad- der Weakness and Rheumatssm.
 said to Cure Almost Any Case
 witheut Injurin9 the Di-
 sestive Organs.

''The people here do not drink enough water to keep healthy" ex- claimed well known authority. The numerous cases of kidney and bladder diseases and rheumatism arc mainly due to the fact that tho drinking of water, natures sreatest medicine. has been neglected.
 Stop loading your system with med- icines and cure-alls; but set on the water wagon. If you are really sick. why. of course. jake the proper medi- cines-plain coAmon vegetable treat ment, which will not shatter the nerves Or ruin the stomach"
 To cure Rheumatism you must make the kidneys do their work; they are the filters of the blood. They must be made to strain out of the blood the waste matter and acids that cause rheumatism; the urine must be neu- tralixed so 1t will no longer be a source of irritation to the bladder, and. most of all, you must keep these acids from forming In the stomach. This Is the cause of stomach trouble and poor di- sestion. For these conditions you can do no better than take the following prescription: Fluid Extract Dande- lion, one-half ounce: Compound Kar- gon. one ounce; Compound Syrup Sar- ing well in bottle and take in tea spoonful doses after each meal and at bedtime but don't forget the water. Drink plenty and often.
 This valuable information and sim pie prescription should be posted up in each household and used at the first sign of an attack of rheumatism, back ache or urinary trouble. no matter how slight.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19
Can You Tell tho Cause
 Of Your Trouble;

Are you sometimes discouraged, an, think you'll never be any better?
 Can you tell the cause of you trouble. or what makes you sick?
 Do you know that about nine -tenthi of all sickness Is caused by kidne, trouble7
 Have you ever stopped to think that your kidneys may be the cause of your poor health7
 Most people do not realize how much work the kidneys are required to dc every day.
 Every drop of blood in the body must pass through and be filtered by the kidneys thousands of times a day
 How can they do their work we'll If they are sickf
 If your kidneys need treatment. Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, the wonderful kidney remedy. will prove to be just the medicine you need.
 If you write to pr. Rilmer & Co.,. Binghamton. N. r.. every reader of this paper, who has not already tried Swamp Root. the great Kidney. Liver and Bladder Remedy. may receive a sample bottle by mail. absolutely free. You can purchase the regular nfty-cent ana one-dollar sise bottles at all drug storea
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19
Cured of Whiskey and
 Morphine
A Year Later Writes That He Is En-
 toying The Best of Health And . Says He Never Felt Better in His Lige.

Your kind letter at hand. am much pleased to hear that your busi- ness Is increasing. It could not be otherwise with the splendid cure you have for drug 9nd whisky patisnt, as since took the treatment, and am enjoying the very best of health. weigh 220 pounds and never have felt better in my life. Morphine Is some thing Of the past with me now.
 can say it's a pleasure to take your treatment. It does not only cure the drug habit. but 1t restores you to your full health.
 when I think of the James sana- I am under great obligations. Give my best wishes to all of my old aeguAintances at the sanatorium.
 G. A LoENNECKER. S06 Bush Street Jackson. Mich.
 JAMES HOME CURE REMEDIES Fer Drug Addietions. Alcoholism. To- bacco and Cigarette Habits, Nervous ness and Insomnia will be furnished at the following prices:
 Whiskey, Wine of Beer ......... Sl260 Tobacco, Cigarettes or Snufr ... 500 All forms of Nervousness of In- ,, Prices % for Hypodermic or Internal Home Treatment for Drug AddlctIons will be furnished on application, with a free sample treatment. charges pre- paid.
 ToSseoe and Cigagetts Habits. sontain- Eisan cover. corfespoadsnee ocn6dsS- tsssuis. sss bsltS Bias. AGssSpSS seaa Reaa.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-19
G. M. LEIGH DIES
 AT HOME IN GENEVA

Geneva. March 1s.-(SpeciaL)-G. M. Leigh. a prominent business man, died here today after a long Illness.
 Deceased moved to Geneva from Ev- ersrsen, Ala. about twelve years since and had been successful in business
 The remains will be carried to Brew ton where they will be inferred tomor- row and where deceased was widely known and related.
 MT. Leigh was brother of ex-Probate Judge Leigh, of Escambia County. He was about 60 years of age, of fine char. acter and leaves a wife and four chll' dren with many other relatives ant numerous friends. His children are married daughters and the wives. re. spectlvely, of W. l.. Canal. D. O Vaughan, W. Nj. Tatom and s. F. Lat. 1ner.