davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
The Marine Controversy Up Again.

The fight regarding the legal status
of the marine, and his duties aboard ship
and ashore, has been renewed as the re-
suit of an order issued by Rear ADMIRAL
Seaton Schroeder, in command of the
Atlantic battleship feet. 1t will he re-
called that President Roosevelt removed
the marines from the ships. and relegat-
ed them to shore duty in connection with
naval operations. This order was resent
ed by the marines, and appeal to Con-
gress resulted in the adoption of a reso-
luton restoring them to duty on shin
board. 1t was said at the time that this
restoration had a reservation. in the fact
that the commanders of the ships could
control the marine and fix their duties
to suit the view of the naval contingent.
This is apparently demonstrated by
Rear-Admiral Schroeder's order.
There are two sides to this question.
but the naval side has the weight of
Judgment as to its right to attend to all
snip duties. The man warsman is no
in a floating fort whoseSxA chinery and
IN action, and whose engines, arms and
other munitions he must protect against
all enemies. Formerly the marines did
guard duty while the sailors handled the
sails and took their tricks" at the
wheel; but this is changed by the intro
uuctlon OF steam and the total abolition
of sails, and the marines have thus be-
come obsolete so far as necessity for their
presence on board the ships is concerned
Rear-Admiral Schroeder's order reveals
the object of the reservation of ship du-
ties for the so-called seamen. 1t opens
as follows:
In order that the seaman branch in the
navy may not be deprived of proper op-
portuhlty to become proficient in the i'm
portant duties and responsibilities Of the
PROFESSION. guard duty on board battleshipS
and armored cruisers will be performed al
tefnateiy by them and by the marines in
regular recurring periods
1t will be seen that the Rear-A dmral
regards the participancy of the seamen
IN guard service important for their
proper development, and that he consid-
erately splits the difference" with the
marines. This plan may convince those
who have heretofore been attacking the
naval contingent that the latter is mere
~ trying to do something for the good of
the service, and not aiming 70 remove
the marine, who has practically been
displaced by force of circumstances. The
matter may possibly come up again in
Congress, but there is less likelihood of
interference now than there was when
Congress was taking pleasure in over
turning things Rooseveltian for redress.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

In a south end station may be in a class
with George AIDE. Recently a newly
made patrolman. doing his route along
the common. discovered the frog pond 10
be overlooking.
1t seems that those in charge had neg
lected to shut off the inlet and as ii re
suit the wafer trickled over the edges.
Thinking that the matter should be
brought to the attention Of his superior
officer the rookie called the desk from
his next signal box. The conversation
ran somewhat like This:
ing"
Bail 1t ont with your hat" replied the
lieutenant. closing the incident.-Boston
journal.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Why Daysey Mayme tainted.

Daysey Mayme Appleton was reading
a newspaper last night when suddenly
she gave scream and fell to the floor
in a dead faint. Now, according to the
books and tradition, Daysey Mayme
tainted because she read the announce
ment of an old Sweetheart's marriage
or death (and it would turn out after
ward, according TO the books and tra-
dition, that he was a cousin of her old
sweetheart by the same name}. But
real life is SO unlike the books and ira
dition related that she saw hosiery adj
vertised for - cents that she had paid
30 cents for the day DECENTRALIZATION
Globe
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
TEACHERS CIo,Es -
Little People Knew Wha, IN
Liked Best in schoop

AttAe FeopIe Knew What IN
Liked Best in School
A teacher whose little punu.
Tor the most part Immigrants ~
them not long ago to each tbtnr
moment and be ready to tell w5..
thing In school they liked best "a ~a'
firsf hand raised was Annetta,s as
her answer came, at the nod ~ uU
mission, with explosive enthns, ger
1t was: ''' ism.
Teachers cio'es!"
Being, as it were, ALREADY ao,u-
toned to the unexpected IN dos,'4
with her flock, teacher accented - thi
reply as quite in The natural ord Us
things, and proceeded to turn - VI
account. She was glad. she said ~
Annetta liked her clothes. because shS
really took good deal of main.
have them nice. They were sha ~
ed out. always very simple. bu+ ~
tried to choose pretty coIors, and sbo-'
all things, to keep them neat NohosS
could help sometimes tearing hoIas :,
getting spots; but everybody sbo,Ss
clean the spots and darn the hoIo, ~
soon as possible. Indeed, a lady Or "
iadylike little girl, would feel verv ~
comfortable If she had to stav pntiau
more than little while. She addad,
See, l keep this little work-bag -
my desk, and l will always lend # IN
any one who wants to mend her ar,so
IN recess. Perhaps might even Soma
times see place that you could mend
but hadn't noticed; would Won like ma
to tell you If l do? am sure if tboro
was anything wrong with nv c]otbos
that / could put right, 1 should wisb
to be told"
The lure Of the dainty work-bag md
the artful suggestion of recinrooltH
worked admirably toward an increase
OF tdiness for some days. Then cana
visit from a group of DISTINGUISHED
educators. More chalk was needed IN
the course of blackboard exerciea
and teacher reached up for It to a
high shelf. AS she turned. several
hands shot up, but she ignored Them
to finish the task in hand. Presently
she raised her arm high in using the
pointer. More hands waved excitadJv
A moment later she did so again. An.
Meta could endure no more
"scusi, teacher" she cried, but your
waist buttons will be all bust off fl
don't tell you! First it was one bust
off, and then it was two bust off. and
then 1t was one more bust off, and the
last one that busted went down the
register!"
1t was very flushed teacher in
becoming If semi-detached blouse who
explained to three twinkling educators
some additional points In her methods
upon which she had not expected to
dwell-Youth's Companion.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
lust, but Not Generous.

The barefoot boy had carefully broken
his fishing pole across his knee and
tossed it into the stream
What's the rouble?" asked the pass
ing stranger.
Been fishin' all afternoon. Didn't get
a bite. If | could have brought home
mess O fish ! might have squared it for
shakin' that boss an plow.'
But why did you break the fishing
pole?"
I'm willin' to take whats comm to
me, mister, but l don't see why l sHouid
save dad the trouble of cuttin his own
switch. Washington Star.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
ArtfuI Young Barney KehOe.

VIII ye be for the Gap o. Dunloe,
I dunno?
Oh! I'm glad o. that same!
All the tourists think shame
To be missir' the Cap o. D,s.aoe--
They do so.
Now, then, whisperl Mayhap
When ye come on the Gap
YEN be seem lass
On this side o. the pass
Thatll AK for the toll
She's dacint good soul,
Though the eyes of her twinkle 50
droll,
Well, yen pay her the tax
An yen wink an ven AK:
Would ye marry young Barney Ke-
hoe ~
IT'S a bit of a Joke
That the folk love to poke
At the lass O. the Gap O. Dunloe.
An it's where, whin we've done wid
Dunloe,
Will We go?
Yen be wise to come back
BY this very same thrack,
Fur there's little that's back O. Dun
loe-
There is so.
Sure, the hills are so bare
There's no scenery there
Like the kind that We find
On this side, dye mind?
SO. I'll watch for the day
Whin ye're passin' this way
Jist to hear what the lass had to say,
Whin she made her reply
To the wink O. yer eye
An yer joke at the Gap O. Dunloe-
Is it who may / be?
Yell find me. dye see,
If yen ak for young Barney Kehoe.
Catholic Standard and Times
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
John Sharp Williams Is Reminded.

The fix of many of my estimable Re
publican brethren in Congress, who want
to revise the tariff, but are afraid of the
gentlemen who conduct the highly pro-
tected infant industries" said John
Sharp Williams, reminds me of neigh
Dor of mine, down in Mississippi, who
went to prayer meeting one night.
After the spirit got to moving he
rose in his place and said: Friends.
would like to confess my sins, but the
grand jury is in session.
Go ahead shouted the leader go
ahead, brother. The Lord will forgive
II know replied the penitent. but
he amt on that grand jury "-Roches-
ter Herald.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Kitchen Philosophy.

A Philadelphia man was in great dis
tress one morning not long since 10y rea
son Of the delay in serving his break
fast.
Il wish you'd go to the kitchen" said
he to his wife, land see what the trouble
is. I've an appointment at o."
The wife complied with his request.
When she returned to the dining room
the husband observed strangely melan-
choly expression on her face.
Well" asked he, impatiently, did
you tell the cook that | wanted my
breakfast Immediately"
Il did,
And what did she say?"
"She said responded the wife, that
we all have our disappointments.' -
Harper's Weekly.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
A Mind Reader.

Pat had got hurt-not much more than
scratch. it is true, but his employer
had visions of being compelled 10 keep
him for life. and had adopted the wise
course of sending him at once to the
hospital. After the house surgeon had
examined him carefully, he said to the
nurse:
LAS subcutaneous abrasion is not OBJ
servable. / do not think there is any
reason to apprehend tegumental cicatri-
cation of the wound"
Then. turning to the patient, he asked
quiZzically:
What do you think. Pat?"
Sure, sir, said Pat, you're a Won
very words out of my mouth. That's
just what l was going to say."-Current
Literature
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

The new teacher was beginning the
arithmetic lessen, says the London
News.
Now, boys, listen to me. Suppose
John has FIVE oranges and james
gave him eleven more. Then II John
handed seven to George, how many
would he have left2"
Dead silence and great perple&N'
fell upon the class.
Come, come; that's easy enough
Well. my lad, what is it?'
Please, sir" said one Of the oo'S
I'VE always does our sums N nap
ples"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
A Survival Of Sun Worship.

The dawn of May day saw the choir
of Magdalen on the top of the Tower,
and the rising sun was greeted with DIR.
Thomas Smiths EuchariStic hymn. says
the Pail Mall Gazette. This is probably
the only survival of sun worship that re-
mains to us, and the Magdalen choir has
been known to wish sometimes that the
custom were more honored in the breach
than ia the observance.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Why the Lawyer Lost a Case.

A little experience practicing law in
New York is apt to make an attorney
stop, look and listen before he takes a
step, according to United States District
Attorney Wise, who prosecuted the sugar
cases. Mr. Wise told the other day of
one of his early cases, when the paint
on his shingle was hardly dry. He was
prosecuting a man for aggravated as
sault. One of his witnesses had told a
hair raising yarn of his experience with
the criminal at the bar.
You know" said the witness, "Jake's
mighty hot tempered First thing he does
when he gets mad, is to yank out
knife and try to cut your heart out.
Wen, he s0mes at me with a big pig
sticker one day, and | was sure scared.
Looked like he had me, for | was cor
nered. Couldn't get away noways. But
was foxy, see? AS Jake ran toward me,
run toward him. And just as he got
close to me. / looked down. and he fell
over my back, Then. before he could get
up. | had kicked him a belt in the jawr,
and tooken his knife away from him.
Jake and mes Deen good friends ever
since"
That tale looked good to Wise, as
showing the savage and barbarous ten,
denotes the man on trial exhibited. So
he called the teller. On the stand the
man fatty denied that he had ever ex-
changed a cross word with Jake. Never
heard nothin' about his having n bad
temper" said the witness Hes always
been peaceable, 50 far as i know"
Wise was thunderstruck. But didn't
you tell so-and-so," said he. that Jake
once rushed at you with knife?'
Sure | did, Mr.. Wise" said the wit
ness calmly. But femme tell you. When
| get to talkin, I'm just naturally one of
the dernedest liars you ever tapped a
ear. But I'm under oath now"
best way he coud.-Cincinnati Times
Star.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

The New Boarder latter an hours
walk from the stationl-Yom advertise
ment said your house was only ten min
utes from the station
The Countryman-Wa my son wrote
that there advertisement an he's the
champion Splinter of the district.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

Bridegroom (expectantly) 49, Wv w,
nv dear father-in-law, l wish u -
Just O word about my debts .As
Father-in-Law (slapping hInl " Nv
back)-Did you say debts? why. -, =.
boy. I'll bet my debts exceed
three TO one!-Fliegende Biae''e'
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Money in Junk.
Rocks INT olt i-i-run!
R-e-c-k-S unit olt i.i-runl

Up and down the dirty back alleys
drives the junk man. singing his mourn
ful. nasal cry, loading his rickety wagon
with broken scraps and pieces Of old
iron-an object Of pity or of ridicule To
most Of the uninformed public.
Let him he admired or envied rather
for if not he. himself. az least his EN-
ployer is probably making more money
than nine out of ten professional men.
Better than that, his work is of the ut
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Home ThouRhts.

A street piano grinding out Nv r.
Sweet Home" is apt to make Ts
mercial man on a trip lonely ua'" .1s
remembers that his wife WIO''
was in the midst Of housecleaD'-S
Syracuse Post Standard
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Applied to the Motor.

Teacher-What do you mean by the
quick and the dead?'
BOWEL, the quick get out Of the
way Of the motor cars, and the dead
don't,-Lippincott'
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
A 81 Of suburban Lie.

I'D like to borrow your lawn mower"
You're early this year. We haven't
started to use it yet ourselves"
Il know that | want to use it before
you get it out of order" cleveland
Leader.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

A woman who appeared in Lou
don police court the other day was
scribed as a "pawning agent
makes her living by pawning ''ns.
for her neighbors, who pay heT ~
mission because they believe Sne ~
secure larger loans than they c0u'o'
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

She-Did he say he knew me when
was girl?
He-No; he said he knew you when he
was hoy.-St Louis Times.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
His Status.

Hasn't he voice in the manage
ment of his own home!'
Why, he hasn't even spunk enough
10 tilibuster, Washington Herald.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

1t is figured that successful pbysi-
clan must have 4 clientele of 100 fam
lies, or about $40 persons.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

His Father thought | gave you
nickel TO stay in the parlor last night
with Sis and her beau. You We're only
in there half an hour.
Willie-Sis' beau. gave me a dime to
get out.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

Evelyn-Was papa really angry?
George-Angry? Wen / should say.
! came TO the point right away and told
him we intended to be married in June.
Evelyn-And what did he say?
George-He said: What? Why not
at OnceE'
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30
Boston Police Wit.

Seldom do we find wits among the po-
hce ieutenants Of this city, but one
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-07-30

Advertising Pays. Try 1t.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22
Tak;n1 I Out in Trade.

The moral OF the story printed be-
low, which is quoted from the New
York Tribune, is that young man
who contemrlates changing his occu-
patton or position should take care
that the bargain he makes with his
new employer is definite. There is
also another moral--for employers
The proprietor of certain Turkish
bath establishment, seeing strong
locking young man working in a butch
ers shop, and being impressed by his
magnificent muscles, told him to re
sign and take a rubber's position with
him.
IT'D give you more than you are get
ting now" he said.
The young butcher, resigning in
ing at the bath-house.
Well" said the proprietor to him,
I'm put you on at once. What did you
get al the butcher's?"
Six dollars and my weeks meat "
returned the young man.
What did that amount to-"
About three dollars"
Well said the proprietor, Il of
fered you more to come here, didn t
I? I'll give you six dollars in money
and four dollars worth of baths
weekly. That is dollar more than
you got at your old place. Youth S
Companion.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22

The impression prevails in Washing
ton that the Chicago and Northwestern
Railroad is particularly close to certain
political influences in Wisconsin. AS
an evidence of the trend of political
affairs many Washington eyebrows
were lifted high when it was announced
there that w. G. Wheeler of GAINESVILLE
had rendered his resignation as United
States District Attorney for the Wes-
tern District of Wisconsin to accept the
local attorneyship of the Northwestern
railroad and that E. M. Hyser of Mil
waukee would become the general
council of the Northwestern to succeed
Lloyd w. Bowers who has been APP
pointed Solicitor General in the At
torney Generals office. While George
Fl. Gordon, Chicago & Northwestern
attorney at Lacrosse, has been named
by Senator Stephenson to be district
attorney for the Western District of
Wisconsin. Glen Flora Star
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22
Steepast Railway in the World.

What claims to be the steepest rail
way line in the world is that recently
opened near Bozen, in the Tyrol. The
Mendel railway with a gradient of "a
in 100, and the Vesuvian with SO, have
hitherto held the record. But the new
line In its steepest part rises 70 in 100
and in other parts 66.
1t leads up the mountainside to Vir-
gil terrace on the River Eisach. The
system employed is that of the electri.
cal wire rope and the ascent is made
at the rate of FIVE feet a second, or
five mint-ses for the whole distance
The car of four compartments carries
thirty-two passengers.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22

An editor is not always so fortunate
as TO have two suits of othes-the
News-Budget man did not have to go
to bed, however, Monday while his
were being cleaned, 1t is proverblal
that the innocent bystander is the one
who gets hit when a policeman takes
a shot at dog. 1t so happened that
it was stream of water that Col Gull
yer was shooting, and the editor being
in line with the dog, was sprinkled with
mud from head to foot. 1t is not the
first time we have been the victim of
'mud-slinging, but it was the first
dose that we ever got like that.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22
THE MYSTERY
OF SALLY
-
By CHARLES SLOAN REID.
Copyright, by shortstory Pub, Co..

(COpyIlSut, ny SilOTlStOfy fup. 0O.1
Sally was a hired girl, he seven
teenth since the baby came, about Is
months before. But we rC allied hat
at last we had found a treasure. Sally
was inventive. The Kaleidoscope
repertoire of amusement which she
furnished for our tootsy-wootsy was
something to command the admiration
of the most callous-brained pessimist
of the never smiles
his aggregation of inventive genius
ha been purchased at a weekly in
stallment of four dollars. Cheerfully
we should have made it five on de-
mand, within week after her ar
rival.
But Sally seemed to be devoid Of
the graft contamination and indeed,
she spent her money like a lord, more
than half OF her weekly pay going for
gimcracks of one kind or another for
the amusement of our little one. 4
car ride to the park each day for the
pleasure of our baby formed one of
her personal extravagancGs. Baby
soon became so much attached to her
that Mamma" was no longer inter
esting, except at certain periods dur
ing the day, and these periods Sally
managed SO cleverly that no disturb
ance came to the household serenity
through baby's impatient demands.
One thing soon became apparent.
Sally had the going habit. She want
ed to be away from the house more
than half Of the time, but, as our little
one always came back from these
little excursions in excellent spirits,
and, bar ing the harassing fears that
Baby might contract some of the
many contagious or infectious diseases
of childhood-such as measles, chick
en-poX, whooping- or some other
horrifying thing-this habit of Sally
was not at all inconyenient to the
household.
Another thing which recommended
Sally was the habitual neatness of her
person, and what became an interest
ing mystery to us was the matter of
how she could spend from TWO or three
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-04-22
A COMMON ERROR
The Same Mistake Is Made BY Many
Ladysmith People. o

The Same Mistake Is Made BY Many
Ladysmith People.
It's a common error
To plaster the aching back,
TO rub with liniments rheumatic
joints,
When the trouble comes from the
kidneys.
Doan's Kidney Pills cure all kidney
ills,
And they are endorsed by Lady
smith citizens
Mrs. Geo. Taylor, living in the
southeastern part of Ladysmith, Wis,
says Mr.. Taylor suffered severely
from backache and kidney trouble
The pains in his back and across his
kidney regions were severe and when
he did any work that required stoop-
ing or lifting, he was in misery He
rubbed his back with liniments and
used plasters, but obtained but very
little relief. Finally he saw Doans
Kidney Pills advertised, and procured
a box at Moneys Pharmacy. They
went directly to the seat of the
trouble, regulated the action of the
kidney secretions and banished the
pains in his back. He has no hes
itancy in giving his name as one who
THINKS very highly of Doan's Kidney
Pills.