davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
THE GREAT BOMBARDMENT.
A Constant Rain of Missiles Upon tho
Worlds Atmosphere.

The regions of space beyond our
planet are filled with flying fragments
Some meet the earth In Its onward
rush; others. having attained incon-
ceivahlc velocity. overtake and crash
into the whirllng sphere with loud Diet
onation and ominous glare, finding de
struction In its molecular armor or
perhaps rieoehetting from 1t again into
the unknown, Some come slngly, va
grant fragments from the inhnity of
space; others fall In showers, like gold
en- rain, all constituting Il lombard
ment appalling In It's magnitude.
1t has been estimated that every
twenty four hours the earth or its at
mosphcre is struck by 1o0000,0O0 mis-
siles of iron or stone. ranging from an
ounce up TO tons In weight Every
month there rush upon the flying globe
at least 12,0o0,000,o00 iron and stone
fragments, which, with lurid accompa-
niment, crash into the circumambient
atmosphere.
Owing to the resistance offered by
the air few of these solid shots strike
the earth. They move out OF space
with possible velocity Of thirty OF
forty miles per second and. like moths
plunge into the revolving globe, lured
TO their destruction by It's fatal attrac-
ton. The moment they enter our at
mosphere they ignite, and the air Is
piled up and compressed ahead Of them
with inconceivable force, the resultant
friction producing an immediate rise In
temperature, and the shooting star the
meteor of popular parlance, Is the re-
suit
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
The Facetious suburbanite.

The second story man had climbed
into the front window OF the facetious
subllrbanite's villa and was engaged
In rltling the latter's pockets of such
random possessions as We're to BIZ
found therein.
'Ab, good evening, my friend" said
the facetious suburbanite from the
depths of his bedclothes. Aren't you
working overtimeT'
I'VE can't help 1t In our business
governor" replied the burglar. 1--WE
amt got no regularly organized hours
OF work It's TO do while you car
with u.s. day and night"
THAT'S Il shame" said the facetious
suburbanite. You ought to get to
gether and form burglars union fol
your own protection"
I'VE amt trade" retorted the bur
glar scornfully. Were an industry"
"Then you should be incorporated
into the steal trust" said the facetious
..:burbanite
Whereupon the midnight maraudeI
laughed SO long and loud that he was
overheard by the policeman on the
corner, who, recognizing the laugh, i'm
mediately fed to a place Of safety
Judge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Barina Feet at Worship.

The India Hindoos and Mussulmans
alike wear both sandals and shoes
(slippers) and the latter boots also
The sandal 0he word is Persian) was
evidently the original covering for the
feet over all southern and eastern
Asia, while the shoe was probably in
troduced into India by the Persians,
Afghans and Mo(mgols, together with
the "tip tilted" Giittte and Etruscan,
boot
Both are usually made In India of
leather, but never of plgskln, and,
while the shoes are always colored red
or yellow, the boots are generally
brightly partlcolored both among the
upper classes being also richly EN-
broidcred In gold and silver and yarie-
gated silk thread and with bangles,
bugles and seed pearls after the man
ner Of the ancient Persian boots rep
resented on Greek vases.
But, of however rare and costly elab-
Grafton. the invariable rule Is to re
move them after entering a private
house Just when stepping on to the
mat or carpet on which the visitor
takes his seat. They must be east off,
the right boot or shoe first, before the
worshiper enters temple or mosque,
and 1t is still regarded as an absolute
proclamation to attempt TO enter either
fully hod.--London Athenaeum.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
MAMMOTH MINERS.
The Experts Who Prospect and Dig
For Prehistoric Creatures.

The Experts Who Prospect and Dig
For Prehistoric Creatures.
Mammoth miners are experts who
know where 10 prospect for mann
moths and how to dig them out, even
as the mining engineer knows where
to prospect for silver and how 10 ex-
tract 1t.
In the west, in Alaska and In SIDE
ria mammoth miners are always ut
work They are always unearthing
creatures that died 100000 years ago.
Siberia was The mammoth's true
home. Siberia 100000 years ago was
one luxuriant forest Here the fur
covered beasts, With their ten foot
trunks aud their fifteen foot stature,
swarmcd. Then an earthquake re-
moved barrier range between 81
IBERIA and the Arctic ocean, and those
low lying forests were inundated. All
their animal aud vegetable life was
killed.
The first of the drowned Siberian
mammoths was found in 1899 by an
Eskimo yillager on the banks OF the
Lena Ii WITS inbeddcd In IA vast cake
of ice The villagers melted the Ice
they Toasted on the 100000 year old
flesh, and then they sold the tusks.
Only the bones remained when Xlo-
tower of the Petersburg Imperial mu-
scum reached that outlandisl village
after n journey of 1900 miles lie
took the bones back to the museum,
where You may see them mounted to-
day. lie bought the tusks from the
ivory traders and fixed them on the
skeleton, and the book he wrote about
his find Is sin II text book among the
mammoth miners of our day.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
WANTED THEM SAVED.
Lincoln Stuck to His Selection Of a
Hospital Chaplain.

Hospitai chaplain.
The nomination of Mr.. Shrigley OF
Philadelphia, Il Universalist, for the
position of chaplain for the hospital
was not met with favor on all sides,
and delegation of professionals went
to Washington TO see President Lin
coin ON the subject. The following In
terview wis the result:
I'VE have called, Mr.. President. to
confer with You regarding the appoint
ment of Mr. Shrigley of Philadelphia
as hospital chaplain
ooh, yes" replied the president Il
have sent his name to the senate, and
he will no doubt be confirmed at an
early date"
One of the young men replied, I'VE
have not come to ask for the appoint
ment, but to solicit you to withdraw
the nominations"
'Ah." said Lincoln, that alters the
case. But on what grounds do you
wish the nomination withdrawn"
The answer was, Mr. Shrigley is
not sound in his theological opinions"
The president inquired. "On what
questions is the gentleman unsound?"
"lIe does not believe in endless pun
lshment. Not only so, sir, but he be-
leYes that even the rebels themselves
will be finally saved" was the reply.
rs that so?" inquired the president.
The members of the committee re-
sponded, yes, sir
well, gentlemen, If that is SO and
there Is any way under heaven where
by the rebels can be saved, then, for
Gods sake and their sakes let the man
be appointed"
MIR. Shrigley was appointed and serv-
ed until the end of the war.-Boston
Post.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
When an Ostrich Kicks.

"Thc only safe place in the nelghbor-
hood Of ii kicking ostrich Is Just be-
hind II, said a 200 keeper. AN ostrich
can kick mule to death. but It's kicks
are delivered at an angle of 10 degrees
Within those 10 degrees, right abaft
the 'popes nose of tie bird there Is
absolute safety. ON the ostrich farms
of California, when the herds are being
driven, you will always see the ostrich
boys holding on 10 the tails Of bad
kickers. The kickers tear along, and
their scaly legs shoot out like piston
rods, but the boys In the shelter Of the
pope's nose are safe New Orleans
Times Democrat
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
THE CONSULTATION.
What Her Sister Heard When She
Listened to the Doctors


Listened to the Doctors
One of two sisters who lived togeth-
er was suddenly taken with lung at
tack She feared WAS serious. says the
London Telegraph She therefore sent
for specialist and asked her doctor
To meet him. Talking over his coming
with her sister. she said Mona. |
wish could know Sir Henry BIS real
opinion. Neither lie nor Dr. NJ will
tell us If there is anything really
wrong. but | would much rather
know"
Her sister replied: DO not worry.
dearest You shall know everything
for | will go down to the dining Room
and stand behind the big oak screen
and listen to every word they say"
"And will you be sure to tell me-
Mona =
You may rely on me, dearest. will
tell you every word"
Even If | am not to get wcll?"
Even then. dearest" promised the
loyal Mona.
The hour for the consultation arriv-
ed, and the sister went to the dining
room and. standing behind the great
oak screen, ensconced herself and pre-
pared TO listen.
by and by the two doctors were
heard descending the stairs, and Il mo-
ment later they came into the room
Walking over to the fireplace, the spe-
eialist sank into an easy chair and the
local doctor sank into another. Then
followed moments silence, broken by
the specialist. who leaned little for
ward
My dear NJ" he said slowly as he
looked across at his colleague. "of all
the ugly women that's the very ugliest
woman I've ever seen in my life"
as she?" replied the local doctor.
you wait until you've seen her sis
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Safeauardipo Crime

II Is inexplicable how those pessi.
mistlc cnrpcrs who are accustomed to
hit all the minor chords with the loud
pedal on can fail to see all about them
the unmislakable signs Of progress and
the reddening dawn OF n new day In
the social yeast. And especially Is this
true In matters pertaining TO crime
There Is no doubt that the general
standards of crime have been inmeas-
urably raised of late. Nowadays IL
man can do almost anything and get
away with IT, provided he can arouse
the sympathy Of the special lady writ
ers and pay the experts. All brothers,
who can say that all this does not
make for the general uplift2 How
can we hope 10 realize the better
things of life until crime has been
made perfectly safef-Life.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
A Subtle Hint.

A representative in congress, who Is
the father of several bright girls, tells
story whereof one daughter Is the
main figure.
For n long time" says the repre-
sentative, 81 had the bad habit OF
hanging about the lower floor when
the girls had men callers. One even
Ing | had settled In an easy chair In
the reception room just off the draw
Ing room when one Of my girls, who
was talking TO a bright chap from our
own state, called out:
"Dadr
"What Is 1t, daughterT
"It's o'clock, the hour when Tom
and ] usually go into committee -
IIarper's Weekly.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Sea Air

At "A meeting of the French Thera
pcutical society NJ. Laumonicr showed
that the therapeutic effect Of sea air
on the coast is quite different from
thirty miles out On the coast the eff
feet tends toward excitement aud con
gestion and, moreover, Is irregular In
It's action out at sen ii Is tonic and
regulating, and IN addition the patient
gets quiet n rcgular life and contin,
uous bath of pure air. These adyan-
tages are moi so patent on board great
liners on account of the vibration and
the smell from he engines, but on Il
sailing ship they are evident.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Ter father and having no interest in

her father and having no interest in
life beyond these two daily duties.
That's ideas of life We're changing.
She discovered that Billy Smith had a
good forehead and mouth and that his
hair looked better with CLEANS OF gray
In it.
Billy still came to the house as I'M
only single man who did come. In
consciously almost she began to look
forward to his visits, and he often
found her shutting cards against his
arrival.
Billy had frightened wonderfully in
these later years. He told stories and
Jokes and the amusing gossip OF the
town. He was earning large salary
and was much sought by mothers with
marrageable daughters. But for some
reason he continued to be free and to
play cards at the captains.
One evening he found That's alone
She begged him rather shyly to stay,
and he stayed. They sat down at the
card table, and Billy dealt the pack for
pedro. They played as for dear life,
scarcely speaking Then by means Of
lucky ace Billy won.
He looked across at That's, but her
eyes We're down. Something In her
face. however. lent him courage, and
he caught her hands, which were alb
sently engaged with the cards
'ThaiSr' he commanded She looked
at him.
81 VIM he said trumphantly.
Yes" she faltered
ut has taken II long time" he said
presently "Thais, l have never given
You II present. But | have one for you
which have carried with me con
1t To you nowy'
yes" That's said meekly.
When he had put the ring upon her
finger he leaned forward and kissed
her.
at has been Il long game" he said,
"and one that required lots Of patience
and determination. You see, dearest,
fell in love with You the first time
saw you, and | made up my mind to
have you, God willing The only way
| could make myself welcome here
was 10 play cards So | played. You'll
never ask me to play cards with you
after we are married. will you, DEAR"
Why not% asked That's wondering
ly.
Because | loathe them and have
loathed them since the first game
ever learned
oh, Billy" That's said
And then and there she realized that
the man of her heart was indeed. after
all, hero
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Chinese Idea of Government.

Here is Chinese idea of prosperity
In II nation When the sword Is rusty,
the pillow bright the prisons empty, the
granarlcs full, the steps of the temple
worn down and those of the law courts
grass grown. when doctors 20 afoot,
the bakers on horseback and the men
Of letters drive In their own carriages,
then the empire Is well governed,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24

First Hunter That breechloader OF
are very bad.
Second Hunter Yes, that's right. In
other words, 1t Is more honored In the
breech than In the observance. Chica-
90 News
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Rebuke.

A chill, dark, autumnal morning. A
breakfast table with an overcrowded
tribe OF clamorous children. A wor
muttering something about mo decent
elbow room" A small child uplifts
solemn eyes from his plate and says
Hadn't one Of US better dieW-Lon
don Academy.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
The tears Of penitent are the wine
" angels Bernard.
Diplomacy.

"Why do you insist on undertaking
the kind of golf you playf"
Because" answered the wise OIL
cial, there Is no use Of making a
whole lot Of people jealous and antago-
nistic over little thing like GOLF
Exchange
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24

"Dearest what did your father say
when you told him | loved youH
"IIe didn't say anything. Harold;
simply went over to the gymnasium
and arranged for Il course Of boxing
lessons"- Pttsburg Press.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Victim of Circumstances.

THAT EnPlishman is funny chap,
remarked the hat salesman In the big
hotel; he hasn't been out Of his room
today"
mo; he Is a victim of circumstances
cOnfided the coffee salesman.
"Victim Of circumstancesf'
Yes; he put his shoes outside his
door last night, according to the Eng
fish custom, and somebody threw then
at cat down the areaway."-Chieagt
News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24

Teacher-Seyeral Of your examples
in arithmetic are wrong, Johnny. Why
didn't you ask your father to help youi
Johnny-'Ceuse wasn't looking fol
trouble, that's why.--Exchange.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24

IT never seems to occur TO persons
who are getting married that they
ought to take each other for good as
well as for better or worse.-Philadel-
phia Record.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
The Decisive Battles.

Some married men VIII contend that
1.-THE Fifteen Decisive Battles of the
Word" will never be complete until
a few domestic scraps are added to the
volums.--London Telegraph.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Our Helpful Maids.

Louise-Pm In an awful boat. After
] started to bleach my hair / found l
had only enough to do half Of It. and
Nelson Is coming tonight. Julia-Nev-
er mind, dear. Let him sit on the
ox-side.-Harper's Bazaar
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Condemnation

"What do you think of members OF
European arlstoeraey as sons-in-lawW
asked the old time friend.
We'll" answered Mr.. Cumrox. "the
way their relatives boss them around
indicates that they ought to make easy
husbands. Washington Star
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
Thu Id;otie Affair.

lrate Iareut-Am to understand
there Is some ldiotic affair between
you and that lmpccunious young ass,
Lord Bilarisl Fair Daughter very
tweetly) you. papa illustrated
Bits.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
The Flame.

Clara-That man who just passed
was an old fame of mine. Kate-In-
deed. What happened between you?
Clara-Oh, he fiared up one day and
went out Boston Transcript.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24

Great men are they who see that
spiritual Is stronger than any material
force Emerson.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-03-24
His Game Of
Patience.
By Gertrude Delaney.

Copyrighted, 1909. by Associated
Literary Press.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1909-06-12
COST WALKER
$40 TO INTERFERE

Martin Walker Rasppery was ar
rested last Saturday. land lodged in
Jail on a charge of having interfered
with headgate in lateral which is
in the Pioneer Irrigation district. He
was taken Monday into Judge Hage-
Inns court where he waived exemina-
alton and was then transferred to
Judge Bryan's department of justice,
where he plead guilty to the charge
and waived all his rights and asked
to have sentence passed. Rasppery
stated that he has been working for
Robert Noble on his ranch near Nam
pa; that the foreman ordered him to
use more water than the land was en-
titled to with the result that he was
arrested and laid in Jail from Satur-
day night until Monday morning
Judge Bryan took into consideration
the fact that the prisoner had no ma
licious intentions when he took more
water than the ranch was entitled to
and therefore was disposed to be as
lenient as possible. So he made the
fine $500 and costs, amounting in all
to $4,000. The officers of the Pioneer
Irrigation district are bound to put a
stop to the custom Of raising gates in
the district by the ranchers. The
district has man, who is paid for
that kind Of work and they propose to
enforce the law.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1909-06-12
HAS MADE The
LAST PAYMENT

The sight of the Deer Flat reser-
voir'cOst The government $50, 1850.
The last chapter of the famous con-
demnation cases growing out of suits
brought by the government against a
large number of ranch owners in the
Deer Flat reservoir of the Payette-
Boise project in which condemnation
proceedings were brought to gain con-
troll OF the land, was closed Saturday
when Clerk of Court Richardson drew
two checks aggregating $52, 495.60 on
behalf of the government, and on its
account in the Boise City National
bank, in favor of r. e. Green.
One. of the checks was drawn for
$26;247.80 in faver of r. E. Green as
administrator of the Taylor estate,
wlaile1 the second was for the same
amount drawn in favor of the same
party on behalf of the Satterfeld es-
tateeand heirs.
Last fall these condemnation cases
were taken into court at which time
the government appeared as the
plaintiffs and large number of set
tiers who owned lands in the then
proposed Deer Flat reservoir located
near Caldwell were named as defend
ants Most of the land was included
in estates as named above and the
heirs. appeared in the court to con-
tend, through their representative, r.
E. Green, that their land was worth
more money than the government
was willing to pay. Failing to agree
upon a price and knowing that the
RESERVOIR was absolutely necessary to
make the project possible the condem-
nation proceedings were started in or
der to determine a fair price on the
land. The case went before q Jury
and the average price was little over
$40 an acre as agreed upon by the
jurors. The government forwarded
the necessary money to q depositary
bank In this city and authorized Clerk
Richardson TO draw the checks in pay.
ment for the land, which he did today.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1909-06-12
REPORT FROM
WOOL MARKET

Union Stock Yards, Chicago, June
9-The supply of sheep and lambs
this week, 51,694 head, shows big in
crease; probably 10000 to $4,000.
This increase, however, was not in
stock offered for sale but in Tennessee
and Kentucky lambs direct to the
packers. From now on we look for
these southern lambs to run freely
as at present prices, which are the
highest ever received, the owners will
get rid of them pretty quickly and we
believe they will be marketed earlier
than ever before. The Tennessee
lambs are pretty well run at this time,
however, the trade will want some
yearlings and sheep right along and
indications point to high prices for
good, fat mutton sheep during the
next thirty days at least, but we wish
to caution our friends about shipping
stuff that is not fat, as they will find
very wide range in prices here be-
tween thin and fat stock; in fact, the
range is wider than ever before.
We have had no grass sheep on this
market up to date but the Missouri
River markets have had considerable.
Arizonas, which have been selling
from $6.4O to $3.50 with yearlings at
SIPS. These prices are pretty high,
and we cannot hope to hold them up
very long, but think the market is 60
ing to be high and in good shape
right along.
If you have anything to ship, we
shall be glad to. hear from you.
Tell US exactly what you have and we
will try and give you the best infor-
nation we can as to what they will
bring.
This season the demand for feed
ers will be much better than last aid
there is some inquiry now for stuff
to put on feed. This is something I'M
usual in the year.
We expect some Rangers on the
market next week and will then be in
position to quote you prices and ad-
vice of their condition.
Yours truly,
THE KNOLLIN SHEEP COM. CO.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1909-06-12
THOMAS KIMMER LOSES HIS
LIFE At THE RESERVOIR

A most distressing accident occur
red at the big reservoir last Friday
night which cost Thomas Kimmer his
life. 1t was while at the reservoir for
load of water that he leaped from
the wagon or rather dove, not realiz-
ing the shallowness of the water, his
head struck the bottom, fracturing
the bones at the point where the neck
joins onto the trunk. Two young men
were with the young man when the ac-
cident occurred. One OF them stripped
on and brought the insensible body
out of the water and placed it in the
wagon. Immediately the boy with the
team started for home, forgetting that
his companion was without clothes,
which were in the wagon, but he was
so excited that he drove of as fast as
the team could go and left his COM
panion to skirmish through the sage
brush as best he could. On arriving