The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-07-01

the stranger asked what time we dined Oh, somewhere about o'clock, replied my lord and master, lightly, when in reality our dinner hour Is o'clock But that was nothing to him. as he never comes to his meals on time and so he thought o'clock as good an hour as any other"
 And then what happened?" I inquired greatly interested in the sequel to this an- nouncement.
 ''on the day appointed was lying in my boudoir just getting ready to arise and take my bath and make my toilette, when the maid tapped gently at my door and said
 MT. Blank has arrived"
 T looked at my watch" she continued, "and it was 10 minutes to 6, there I was absolutely in negligee, and dinner an hour away, and our guest wandering around the house all alone.
 What on earth did he come here for at this unearthly hour?" I shrieked at the maid-I had to take it out on somebody
 Perhaps Mir. Blank was saying to him self in the drawing room:
 What in the dickens do people have dinner at this awfully unreasona bly, hour?" l suggested
 T have no doubt of it.. was the quick reply. "I dressed as rapidly as possible and when we finally met I discovered that Augustus. who was the cause of all this disturbance and commotion, was enjoying a game of golf at the Coun- t,,, al, h1 domestic havoc he had wrought as only a nice, amiable family man could be. When he arrived, about 20 minutes after [, I gave him a whole flight of stares, and our guest froze up like a glacier Angus tus explained in the most nonchalant manner, that he really didn't know it was so late, and he was awfully sorry he had made such a mistake In the dinner hour and thousand and one other foolish, silly excuses. All during dinner my Psyche Knot kept falling off, and had to be surreptitously pinned on, and my frock was only half fastened up the back, and my temper was all awry, and so the event was an absolute failure, all on account of a mere man, who did not know the meaning of the word punctuality."
 This story was received with many, That reminds me-" and we heard the same thing practically of every liege lord who was represented there.
 One woman told a story about her son and if a mother can ever see any fault in her son, then he must be admitted to be glaring. She said that on one oc- casion she had invited young girl to spend Sunday with her, as she was very anxious for her son to meet her.
 .'I asked him." said this clever woman, Sunday dinner and supper, as l wished him to meet my guest Of course he replied that he would be delighted Sun day came and with it the young girl, pretty and fresh and dainty as a rose in bloom, and I felt sure that the match my heart was set on would be consum- mated before my very eyes, and they would fall in love and marry and live happily ever afterwards.
 ''We waited and waited our Sunday dinner-1;30, ?, 2:30. well we cant wait any longer. and still he did not come. We finished our delicious dinner and still no sign of him and I was so frustrated making excuses that everything from my point of view seemed a disma1 failure. Finally about o'clock my boy asrived-so penitent--so dstressed--but 1t couldn't be helped-he had plainly forgotten. Moth CT. dear. he said. I am related to George Washington and I cannot tell . - And. of course, the rssult was that I for. gave him. but not without saying: T