The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1909-05-01

awOke in my new house and looked
out of the window, my vision swept a
flock of barns and Outbuildings, q
goat and a load of tin cans in the al
10y!
while was grieying about this ana
anathematizing myself for all kinds
of an easy mark, my wife gave me a
gentle poke and asked me II | was
drowning or just falling, out a Seven-
story window. Maybe you think
wasn't happy when | awoke to the re-
alization that 'Happyhurst" was still
in the family!" ae ..
Speaking of Dreams added the
hostess, Il certainly had one that
night, too. L"
you two must have partaken OF a
late mncheon-er, / beg your pardon
for interrupting!" from one of the
guests.
Granted" sweetly aequiesced the
hostess. "Yes. We had been down
town to see Maude Adams and-well,
guess that lobster didn't agree with
| either of us at that time of night
but, as ! was saying: i had a most
awful dream, ID was one OF those
reeking hallucinations where the ogre
chases you with a bloody knife and
you awaken with a shrek that startles
| everybody and everything in the
house except the watchdog! Well,
thought that my husband and l were
somewhere just don't know where.
but 10 seemed like the middle OF the
earthquake at Messina-and all at
once two great, red-handed rufians
with knives foot long took after us,
vowins murder. ! remember had on
my new Paris balldress and Alfred
was in evening clothes. We dashed
madly over broken timbers aud fallen
masonry the demons hot in pursuit.
Once they were so near could hear
the breathing of their leathern lungs,
ture in the fence, the foremost of the
two slashed wildly in the air with his
knife, cutting long slit in my opera
cloak!
Running madly down the street, I
stopped Alfred hurriedly. Sect said
l. There is a sale OF Turkish rugs on
and oh, Just look at that beauty for
only 81. Why, it's worth $400 II it's
worth a cent?
Il remember, too, that Alfred didn't
want 30 stop, but I insisted and We
! went into the store and | bought the
most beautiful evening gown for 81
and trading stamp, that ever
owned!
~Now wasn't that a nice termina-
tion of an awful dream" concluded
the hostess, happily.
I "'The eternal fsminine'H quoted All
fred, dryly.
Speaking Of mental chimeras-"
began the gentleman guest.
| "Oh, mercy" interrupted the lady
y guest, "just see what time It is! We
! must go this minute"
Let him tell it," begged the host.
, "Indeed, no, she replied firmly. Il
} won't sleep a wink tonight as It Isl"
o o o
I BY the Way.
The greatest fairy tales of the times
| are those told by married men.
3 n A =
, The mudturtle lays as many eggs as
the hen, but the mudurtle doesn't
NoShlOs Shbl ~ Hag n " du1 ol Oinos
4 4 u
The fact that Eve had to make her
own clothes and do her own work
would bar her from society, anyhow
even If she were living today.
4 4 &
0 Sympathy" says an exchange, "iS
the gulf stream of life" Yes, and the
d darned stream is 80 full of poodle
r dogs that married man can't dive II
n to save his life.
l. o o o
T. Customers Carefully. Waahed.
d The following Ia the advertisement o
Japanese who takes In washing
Contrary to our opposite company, W
. win most cleRnly and carefully wash on
r customers with possible cheap prices a
4 follows: Ladies, s. per 100; gentlemen
t16O per iOO."-The Laundry.
S. <,
:: R4.Ma.s.s4s