The Hartford herald. [volume] (Hartford, Ky.) 1875-1926, 1909-01-27

In such case man could make
valuable use Of him as messenger
There Won have it-there you have
;tp, shouted Mr.. Bowser as he danced
around I'm his excitement and brighten
ed the cat out Of the room on galiop-
ssThere Is the solution Of the flying
problem. and not soul in this whole
world has thought Il out except me.
That's what have been puzzling over
for the last -four weeks. That's what's
beeu aiiing me instead Of lumbago.
Mrs. Bowser, we are famous-we are
rfchF
..But just what is your pIanr" she !,
asked.
-simply this: The ostrich could ny
II he had the wings to do IT. He goes
through all the motions as II Is. Make
wings for him. Give him q show. Let
him practice flying until he has got It
down pat. Then teach him what you
want done. II Il Is TO carry q mall
bax to Boston or Philadelphia, all
KRht. II n b to rise with 300
pound shell and seek out a man
of-war belonging to the enemy and
drop II down one Of her tunnels and
blow her all to smfthcreenA all right
again. He can san over fort and
drop a she'll or other explosive He
can san over q town and destroy 1t.
He can reach height where he win
not be seen, and the terror he viii
spread VIII be something awful. Do
you seer
Mrs. Bowaer nodded her head to stg-
nifty that she did, and be continued
.srhe Japanese insist that country
sausage such as we End IN all our
butcher shops 70 made, down cellar or
out N the alley instead Of In The coun-
try. We deny the allegation Reia-
tions between the two countries be-
come strained During THIS critical
period Japan further declares lamb
chops sse really mutton chops. and If
teen minutes later, before we have
time 20 call her a liar. she declares
war aad starts feet for San Fran
cisco. Then what follower
Your flying ostriches come into
play
Huat OotffcOSo O991o 10
,sExaetly. my dear woman You have
bead on you. A hundred flying os-
Irfchss, each with a 500 pound dyna-
mite shell In bis claws. starts out to
meet the aeet- The feet Is sighted.
the shells dropped. and Japan Isn't
heard OF again for the next hundred
years. Do We w1nt anything betterf
With a hundred ostriches trained to
dy and DO the work we can make all
the Other nations on the face Of the
earth shake In their boots."
What name are you going to give
tT' seriously inquired Mrs. Bowser.
7 have already selected that
shall call It the Bowsexplant That
gives you half the honors. By thunder.
woman, bat we've hit it-we've surely
hit nj No blemed old flying machines
for uz, but we simply turn an ostrich
loose and tell him to get there. The
world has been fooling around over
hundred years to solve a problem that
we have made clear In ten minutes"
But 1 should like TO hear what 9TH
ers say about H."
And 50 you shall. I'm going over
and state the case TO the druggist. He
once invented a flying machine him
self and has always been interested.
I'll bet 1 jump him out Of his boots"
Mr.. Bowser departed at once He
didn't propose to let that ostrich idea
get cold. He went out. saying that be
would be back in half an hour, but
that time passed-then another half
hour, then a fun hour. Then Mrs.
Bowser and the cat went TO the front
door to see II anything could be seen
Of him. On the front steps was a hud-
died figure with the rain beating down
on It. Mrs. Bowser took 1t by the arm
and assisted 1t into the ball, and after
a look by the gaslight she exclaimed:
why. Mr.. Bowser. what's the mat
terri
your lawyer.' he Kissed as he lean
ed against the wall Your lawyer
my lawyer-divorce-aiimonyg
And as she stood gasping for breath
he YEARLY toiled up the stairs until
lost to sight The druggist must have
said something to crush him.
NJ QUAD