davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
Observing the Proprieties.

\ little girl aged three had been
lift in the nursery by herself, and
her brother arrived to find the door
locked. The following conver> alton
took place:
want to tum in, Sissie. "
But you tant tum in, Tom
But | want to.
Well, Is inmy nightiegown, an
nurse says little boys mustn't see lit
tie girls in their nighte gowns.
After an astOnished and reflective
silence on Tom side of the door.
the miniature exc announced tri-
umphantly, " You tan tum in now,
Tom; | looked it OFF -
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
SOCIALISM.
Mt Vernon Herald.


What is this Socialism anyway, and
where is it leading? We have talked
with scores of men who profess to be
Socialists, and no two agree as to
what Socialism is or what it seeks to
accomplish.
Articles offered for publication
throw no light on the subject, for no
two agree even on the alleged car
dinal principles, and are really but
the conception of individuals. The
conceptions range all the way from
Il paternal government, to common
ownership of all property, existence
with only a minimum of toll, no rich
and no poor people, to common an
archy, the overthrow of all govern
ment, and the right to partake of
the fruits of anothcr's toll and econ
omy.
We have noticed, however, that
most of the advocates of Socialism,
in its varied phases, have very
similar history to that of the old
farmers squeaing pig. ( SOW be
came the mother of eleven pigs. Ma.
turc had provided her with only
ten nursing bottles. and SO when
breakfast was ready for the new fam
ily, one fellow who was a little slow
and disposed to grumble about the
size of the family. was compelled tC
wait and get his breakfast at the
second table. He was still complain
ing about it when the dinner-houl
came, and again lost his chance by
squealing when he should have beer
rustling And so it continued with
unvarying result. He became dis
satisfied with the world, cursed hi,
mother for not providing enough
nursing bottles. and became IA re-
former. declaring that the struggI,
for existence was too hard.
We hope to avoid oifense. but is i
not possible, Mr. Socialist, you ar,
an eleventh pig?
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
WILL 1T PAY?
The Question Should Be Carefully Consid
cred at the Polls.
GELM. Wash. Nov. %. 90.
FL. STANDARD:

ELM. Wash. Nov. %. 90.
FL. STANDARD:
IS 1t possible that the property
holders Of ThurSton county are GOING
to allow themselves To be hoodwinked
into voting for local option in the
fare Of the fact that it has been a
failure in nine cases out Of ten when
II has been tried? Ii experience i
worth anything, we have certainly
had rnoLGh of il in hundreds of cases
to satisfy men of intelligence
Our taxes are certainly excessive
enough without dcvi>jng schemes for
the adoption of the means Of meeting
I EN-. ! ann safe in saying that 90 per
cent. Of drunkardS are men who DAY
no taxes and, as said before. the
only way of getting anything out Of
them for revenue is through their
appetite by way OF the license system,
and consequently the burden of tax
alton will be entirely on the Shoul-
dcrS of the property holders. ! can {
believe that Il majority of the voters
Of this county are dishonest enough
to desire the ConiiScation of any
man property. for that is what it
means for those who have invested
their money in the liquor business in
good faith. anticipating the protec-
ti"n of the State
But am asked what are we
going to do with the drunkard
Why. enforce the law. of course.
! \ non-cnfOrcement of the law
brings Il contempt for the la.
Make 1t compulsory upon the Com
misSioncrs to exact Il bond from every
one asking for a license To run Il re-
spectacle saloon. and not allow any
drunkenness on penalty of forfeiting
his license Wouldn't that he much
better than prohibiting ~ per cent
of the people from exercising natural
| right. because one damphool don ,
| know when he has enough ? an
aware that some will say "Conine is
working in the interest of the liquor
dealers. might with like propri
ETY. say you local optionists are work
ing in the interest of the blind pig
and boot-lcggcr. am fighting for ;
principle as old rs the Declaration o
Independence. The right of Life
Liberty and the pursuit of happi
ness | want no curtailment of my
liberty SO long rs | do not infring,
on the rights of my fellow man. Lo
cal option is an infringement on per
sonal liberty. of the rankest kind
and in opposing it am simply sus
tanning a principle dear To the hear
of every libcrtyloving patriot.
J. {. Coo
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
The Numbr 4.

There are four cardinal points, four
winds, four quarters Of the moon, four
seasons, four rules of arithmetic, four
suits of cards, four quarters to the
hour, four legs for furniture, most
animals 90 on four legs. the dead
are placed between four planks, the
prisoners between four walls. We
have four incisor and four canine
teeth, and our forks have four pronGs.
All animals when butchered are cut
into four quarters. The violin, great
est of all string instruments, has but
four strings. Four of a kind is Il
pretty good hand at poker, even if
they are only fours.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
An Apt Definition Of Gentleman

An exact definition of gentleman
has been tried many times, and never
perhaps with perfectly satisfactory
result. How is this?
Little Sadie had never heard of any
of the definitions, but she managed
to throw Il CLEAN of light on subject
albeit one touched with unconscious
cynicism. The word was in the spell
ling lesson, and | said:
Sadie, what is a gentlemen"
" Please. ma am. she answered, "a
gentlemen Il man you don't know
very well.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
Her Proposal.

You We been courting me now for
Il number Of years, George. re-
marked Il girl to ayoung man. and
| want to make little leap-year pro
posal.
Ill am not in Il position TO m-mar-
rv just yet, stammcrcd the youth.
but
Who said anything about mar
riage?' interrupted the girl. 81
was going to propose that you stop
coming here and give somDody clst
Il chance.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
OF Interest To Women,

To such women as are not seriously out
OF lhealthA but who have cxacting duties
tolperiorA either in the way OF house
hdld cares\or In social duties and func-
tidlAXiSh\s seriously tax their strength
as weHS& Nursing mothers. DR.. Pierce's
Favorite PSSrIptlon has proved a most
valuable supSArting tonic and invigorat-
ing nervine. BY its timely use. much
serious sickness aud suffering nay be
ayoided. Tie operating table and ne
suIge0ns, knife. MQU1d--ll-4s- -9c.-eEed'
Seldom have % be emploEed i this m9st
valuable Momau.S leUedy -4eEe- -IeSIllfA
70 n good time. The "Favorite Prescrip-
t.0n"Eas proven great boon to expectant
mothers by preparing the system for the
coming of baby, thereby rendering child
birth safe, cusy, and almost painless.
Bear in mind, please that Or. Piercea
Favorite Prescription is not a secret or
patent medicine. against which the most
Intelligent people are quit" naturally
averSc, because Of the uncertainty aS To
their composition and harmless character,
but is MEDICINE OF KNOWN COMPOST
TON, a full list Of all its ingredients being
printed, in plain English, On every bottle
wrapper. . SAn examination OF this list OF
ingredients will disclose the fact that IL Is
non-alcOholc in its composition, chemlc-
ally pure, triplr-rctincd glycerine taking
the place Of the commonly used alcohol,
In its makeup. In this connection 1t
may not be out Of place to state that the
rFavorite Prescription" OF Dr: Pierce IS
rle only medicine put up for the cure OF
woman's peculiar weaknesses and all
ments. and sold through druggists, all
the ingredients Of which have the un-
animous endorsement Of all the leading
medical writer's and teachers of all the
several schools of practice. and that TOO
as remedies for the ailments Tor when
rFavoritc Prescription" is recommended;;
A little book of these endorsements Will
be sent to any address, postpaid. apd
absolutely free II you request same by
postal card. or letter, of DR.. K. Y. Pierce,
Buffalo. y. Y.
DR. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets cure con.
situation. Constipation is the cause OF
many diseases Cure the cause and you
cure the disease. Easy TO take as candy.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
W hat People Saw.

What difference does it make TO you
What people say
Iou know the false words from the trn
From day to day.
You know they criticise you sure,
Ii you are bad or good and pure;
1t ; easy for you to endure
What people say.
Keep on, don't let it break You down,
What people say;
Don't let it drive YOU out OF town,
What people say.
What people say is seldom true,
Someone has got it IN lor Won;
Forget it, brother, =. ID. q,
What people say.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
Both Suited.

Swift Jones and his wife seem
to be very fond Of musical comedy"
Smith -" Yes. indeed; his wife
goes to See what the women in the
audience have on, Ond Jones to see
what the girls on the stage have off. "
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
Mans Superiority.


" Woman. exclaimed the sutIra-
gcttc, is the equal Of man in
every
oh, don't know. - replied Il man
in the aud.ence. it takes q man. IL
put an angleworm on dshhook. -
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
Wealthy American Women.

lietty Green is the richest woman
in the world, with 500. 900. 600.
Then follow Mrs. Russell Sage, with
a fortune of $50, ,000, 900. and third
Mrs. f.. II. Hartman. with $40. 00O. :
900 and fourth, Mrs. Fred. c. Pen.
field, with 500 900, 900.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

Two jays We're ambling home
ward at an early hour. after being
out nearly all night. Don't your
wife miss You on these occasionS?'
asked one. Not often.' replied
the other; she throws pretty
straight. -
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
A Fierce Prospect.

Two ladies' who had known each
other in the years gone by, met on
the street. One of them. who had
been married for some years. wis
pushing baby carriage in which
were fine triplets, all girls. The
other lady had been in the bonds of
matrimony couple OF weeks.
What beautiful children - eX-
claimed the newly married one with
much interest, after the two friends
had exchanged greetings. " Yes, >
replied the proud mother. "and it
was the funniest coincidence. At
our wedding supper the boys who
played with my husband in the or
chcstra sercnaded him and played
Three Little Maids, from The
Mikado. Isn't that queer The
newly married one gasped for breath
and turned pale with horror. Mcr-
| ciful heavens y she cried, at our
wedding supper, 4 couple of weeks
ago, Toms friends sercnaded him
also. and they rendered the Sextetto
from Lucia. y
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

\ YorNG man fell into IA state of
coma, but recovered before his friends
had buried him. One of them asked
what it felt like To be dead Dead.
he exclaimed. WASH t dead.
And knew | wasn't. because my
feet were cold and | was hungry.
But how did that make You sure?
Well | knew that if | were in
heaven | Shouldn bc hungry, and il
was in the other place my feet
wouldn / be cold.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

THE sofa on which Dickens died al
Glad>hill has just been presented to
the Dickens museum at Portsmouth.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

LIFE is real if not altogether earn
est among people of Il type recently
mentioned
s'pose John is still taking life
easy said the woman in the spring
wagon on the road TO Alexandria.
Yes, answered the woman who
was CARRYING an armful of wood
John has only two regrets in life.
One is that he has To wake up to eat
and the other is that he has to quit
eating to sleep.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

SHORT prayers, heart speaks; long
ones, lip service.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03
sympathy

The White Rirr .LurHnl says that
Charles +. Ncwcomb and Mrs. Mar
tena kvalShaug should hang, for the
killing of Mrs. Kvalshaug's husband.
Certainly. More hanging and not so
much court would be u good thing
for the State of Washington Too
many murders occur in the Ever
green State, and Il cold -bloodcd mur-
dcrer should be- given Il cold blooded
hemp, nccktie party.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

LII II .@ N1A\I) y
{ INDIVIDUAL oersIos
->t'u''Iilah y 'iie name Oh Il tailor
III ,o'" i''tTo' '"Iil' appropriate,
i" ! II
The Red widnv'' has mazda bo.
exit from tho pa.isiar sta.o Sba
has been acuuittcd Sb. nr,vided
"copy" for ucy>nanr..s fo,. g, wool,
H. u -
\
The P-L runs daily at the top Of
first column on its editorial page. Il
quotation from some celebrated writ
or. The quotations, to the majority
of T. l. readers, are about as useful
and interesting as jclly-tlSh would
some people, Whch hahdiihS an
NShoS''c or tdth"IIc newspaper
Scc'il u ~ "> lrlSh'eheu aS lhouSh u
WAS rattleSnakc. lhesf sort OF
huii'ah oelh@S are aIralu Oh theiroW
siiduo"' are dlraIu 10 20 INTO d uarh
pace Ior Il drink OF water after
n'Sht' though nearly fahiahed' per
u"pS' Win tiiirSt-
D. pohoiioe' ii loriiitr seattle
politician, who always had some sort
ninc-months' sentence in the King
,. ;.I sll.... ,...........,
dor f,I,o nro,.r,.s If al nnli,ic.
;,n. ~ - o;uo ;ol .n,,,.oo
for roh,,;n;nr n,,,,,.,,n,io.f,1 ,r.
to,,o,
=
!. :. .. .l,,.a,... ,,,,L, t,o, ..
-. -, Ia
W. ..,
ros, Ios. Wol,os1o,. os,or,oo,;
oolor ,ros oo,soa ~. ,ho ror,lonoor
-. III ao.la,,
oI,..a,[;, .,,a., g., c.., oI,.,,,;o
.;.;.a', h.: ",,...,;. ,h;.
49,, ,a,ao,,,;',,,,;.,
Five arrests for drunkenness in This
city for the month just past is the report
tiI' iia.i'c = u', wv, ;u"". i.ne .I''p"aes very
when we were strictly wet Garfield
c""''fy Nf"nd'r".
certainly. Same Ola story whisky
Will be drank IN dry towns as IN
wet only IN larger quantities, as
rule Tor each glass IN a wet
town. IA bottle is the thing IN a
dry town.
WI heh i'le 'lrSi SioVei-iuii oi art
Ill t"c 'o''st''i'lloh vi Tue l'dht
Washington canal was thrown. one
woman wrapped up some soil III her
handkerchief and SAID. shall plant
Il flower. and this soil Shal. aid in
keeping 1T alive. hope. until | see
the first ship enter Lake Washing
ton. The woman intends to keep
alive century plant. She has my
sympathy.
Inc ""''' h'f'' ''""'""' says mar
,,.' s''o".' "'.ns' 'o' ''i'
n''''6 ''''''''."-' nus ''''''
'"''''S' -'o' '',' S'iE anu hot 81
:" o' NM
"''''S ,'"''''' > '''"i III '',' "'''
- ''"'', ,'''' . o'''- '''oo,''i nun
'' ~ 7''' 'o'' '''o''e'
"''"f' ''' ~"'' f'' "
:, 49, o,; 1.. g.,
1','~ .II W. W.
-. -, :,
erS. Uncle sam should take hand il
the game, and teach the crowd of :"
won wotk people a lesson thai
they VIII remember the remainder o
their lives. In o!hor words. pu'
these iaw-deiyInG people promptly
out OF business and not be too fastid
-
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

When the first shovel-full of dirt
in the construction of the Lake
Washington canal was thrown. one
woman wrapped up some soil in her
handkerchief and said, {" shall plant
n flower. and this soil Shal. aid in
keeping it alive. | hope. until see
the first ship enter Lake Washing
ton. The woman intends to keep
alive a century plant. She has my
sympathy.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

Patronize the STANDARD adver-
iS.rs
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

1t is not always tanglc foot.
" rcd-cyc' nor nose-paint that
makes mans nose red saw an
Olympia man, with Il very, very red
nose last Wednesday afternoon its
color was caused by the gentleman
coming into contact with another
Olympia mans fist r. first Olympia
citizen having "butted in to things
not concerning him.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

THE Lord loves a cheerful loser.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

Five arrests for drunkenness in this
city for the month just past is the report
of marshal and city Justice, and this is in
name dry town. This compares very
iavorahly with our record Il year ago
when We were strictly wet. GdJfeid
C0HHty StdndiM.
Certainly. Same old story whisky
will be drank in dry towns as in
wet only in larger quantities, as
rule-for each glass in a wet
town. a bottle is " the thing in a
dry town.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

If the police department of Spo-
kane cannot subdue the |. W. W.
law breaking bunch of trouble max
crs. Uncle Sam should take hand in
the game, and teach the crowd of -
won work people Il lesson that
they will remember the remainder of
their lives. In olhor words, put
these law-defyinG people promptly
out of business and not be too fastid-
iouS about how it is done.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

y Tacoma preacher named Buch-
anan. says hanging is murder and he
doesn't believe in H. II some miscr
able whclp or L popular male member
seduccd his daughter then murdered
her, would he pat him on the cheek
an Il kiss him for 50 doing; Buch-
anan quotes jesus Is saying, Love
your enemies. and when the assas-
sins of Jesus nailed him to the cross
aging Father, forgive them, for
sthey know not what they DO. This
reverend overlooked the one g." An
eye for an eye; a tooth for u tooth.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

p J. DonohOe, IL former Seattle
politician, who always had some sort
of scheme to make this cruel old
world Il paradise, is now doing a
ninc-months sentence in the King
county Jail for obtaining money un-
der false prctenSrS. If all polite
ians were to receive Jail sentence
for obtaining money under false pre-
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

" want to get good novel tC
read on the train-somcthing pa
.hetic, said an Olympia woman to Il
booksalesman, yesterday.
Let me see. How would The
Last Days OF Pompcii do?' asked
the salesman.
" Pompeii!' never heard of him
What did he die of?
I'm not quite sure, replied the
salesman; some kind OF eruption
| va baard 80
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-12-03

Some people. when handling an
AgnoStic or Catholic newspaper,
seem to be as frightened as though il
was rattleSnakc. These sort of
human beings are afraid of their own
shadow, are afraid to 80 into a dark
place for a drink of water, after
night, though nearly famished. per
hapS, with thirst.
The Salt Lake herald-Republican. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1909-1918, 1909-08-20
NO FATALITIES
IN ENCAMP MENT
Report of Physician Shows Few
Were Overcome by Heat,
and All Recovered.

The report Of DR.. W. F. Beer. sUperin-
tending physician of the encampment Red
Cross corps, shows that though there
were a large number of cases treated
during the week there were only seven
teen of this number who were veterans,
and there was not q single death. Con
sidering the advanced age Of the veterans,
their hard trip across the continent and
over the mountains, and the extreme heat
during a portion of the enCampment week,
the showing is regarded as remarkably
good.
During the week there were 220 cases
treated by the Red Cross corps OF these
$50 were of children composing the living
flag who tainted during the parade, sew
enteen We're old veterans, twelve Of inns
number were overcome with exhaustion
during the march. and the remainder
were spectators and others who tainted
during the week. There was not a sin
gle death and by Saturday everyone who
was stricken had fully recovered.
The showing III Salt Lake compares
very faVOTably with that Of other cities
in which the encampments have recently
been held. During the parade of the old
soldiers in Minneapolis in 1905 there were
100 veterans overcome from the neat ana
exhaustion, and Of these there were three
deaths. During the week there were
other deaths of veterans attending the en-
campment. At Saratoga Springs in 1907
there were lightweight veterans stricken
during the parade and during the week
there were three deaths of veterans. With
ideal weather at Toledo there were forty
two veterans overcome during the parade.
The Salt Lake herald-Republican. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1909-1918, 1909-08-20
ASTHMA AND HAY FEVER
WILL VANISH

Everybody knows that HyOmet cures
catarrh. But there are many sufferers
from asthma apd hay fever who don't
know that Hyomei will give them in
slant relief and, if used regularly, per-
manent cure.
But F. Q. Schramm knows so well
what Hyomei will do that he guarantees
it to cure catarrh, hay fever and
asthma.
Surely it's worth trial on that basis
and why people continue to choke and
wheeze and spit and hawk and shuttle
when a certain cure is at hand is be-
yond the comprehension Of human in
telligence.
When you breathe HyOmei deep into
your lungs you breathe exactly the
same pleasant antiseptic baImy air that
you would breathe in the forests Of
pine and eucalyptus Of inland Australia.
"DoctOring and remedies never helped
my hay fever, till I used Hyomei. 1t
gave me great relief, and has my en-
dorsement. Louis A. GrObe, Flint,
Mich.
Complete Hyomei outfit is only S1.00,
and extra bottles so cents. A Hyomei
outfit consists Of a bottle of HyOmei,
hard rubber inhaler, medicine dropper
and full instructions for use. Just
breathe it in and get immediate relief.
The Salt Lake herald-Republican. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1909-1918, 1909-08-20
MUCH DAMAGE IN
FLOOD DISTRICT
More CIOudburStS in Colorado
Transform Streams Into
Raging Torrents.

Denver, Colo. Aug. 19.-CIoudbursts in
southern Colorado caused further damage
by floods late today The downpour of
rain near Trinidad was said to be the
worst since 1894. The water rushing
through PurgatOire river washed out sew
eral bridges ana the tracks of the Colo
RADIO & Southern railroad were torn away
in places.
A force of men was put to work pilIng
up sandbags TO keep the river in its chan
rel, the concrete wall having given away
In many places. Reports from up and
down the river were that all the smaller
bridges were gone.
T. other parts of the state the flood
conditions, brought about by unusually
heavy rains i'm the last three days, were
improving The flood in the Arkansas
river, including the Royal gorge, was sub
siding.
Another cloudburst occurred at Four
Mile creek this afternoon, which again
transformed the stream into a raging tor
rent and sWelled the river at that point.
The Royal Gorge itself is a mass Of
tangled debris. The famous hanging
bridge is covered with sand and debris
three feet deep.
Both the Denver & Rio Grande and
Colorado Midland railways are operating
trains west of Leadville, but traffic has
not been resumed.
Today the river at Florence washed out
100 yards of reinforcement embankment
below the headsates of the Union ditch.
1t has been raining there almost constant
" for the last twenty-four hours.