Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-04-09
The Diary
By F. E. c. ROBBINS.

'"rEirs's face when he came home
1ae afternoon attracted attention al
most as soon as the bulky parcel that
he carried in his hand.
What on earth have you got now
hat you're so ticklod over?" de.
manded his wife. She took the par
lei from Caleb's unresisting hands.
He watched her with a kind Of fas-
cination while she impatientIy tore
OIL the brown wrapping-paper, and as
she brought to view something that
looked like an overgrown account
book he found voice to say, ITS
only diary"
"A daryl" echoed Mrs. Jenkins.
Just as though you had patience
/ enough to keep a diaryl l should
judge by the size of the book that
you expected to write in It every day,
and live to be a hundred, at thati"
Then, as she opened the book, she
exclaimed, why, it's been usedl
Somebody has palmed off a second
hand diary on to you, Caleb Jen-
lzins,"
'Oh, that's why 1 bought it.
wanted to see If l couldn't floor Zen
as Perkins with It once in a while.
You see, zenas has got to be con-
! siderable of a nuisance with that
diary of his, that he's kept for a
dozen years OF more.
''He doesn't allow anybody else to
know anything. If anybody remarks
| that this is the warmest October
that he ever see, why, Zenas is ready
10 prove that the mercury averaged
o run higher in October only two
years ago.
"Then he's always wanting to
know if we remember that it is Just
so many years ago to-day that Joel
| Fixes barn burned, or that some
Thing or other else happened. Only
| The other day I was saying that
Cap'n Bakers third wife hadn't been
dead more'n six months when he
married his fourth. and Zenas took
nc right up, and got his diary, and
showed by it that the cap'n had re-
mained a widower just eight months
and clever days.
You can't bring up a namable
thing but zenas is waiting to pounce
on you with his diary. And / don't
believe he's right more'n half the
time. I calc'late he doesn't keep
the diary along regular, but writes it
up at odd jobs rainy days"
81 s'posed Zenes spent his rainy
| days hanging about the store, like
some other folks | know"
Time and again." continued Ca
leb, disregarding his wife's thinly
veiled allusion, I've thought of
keeping one myself; but a diary has
to have some age before it's good
for much, and Zenas had most too
much of a start.
lone day, when / had an errand
at old Uncle Artemas Baxter's, 1
found him writing in big book, and
ne remarked that he had kept a
diary for thirty odd years, and l
thought then that I'd kinder like to
get hold of it. Well, when the old
gentleman passed away, and l heard
that his son-in-law, Seth Strout, was
a-disposing of the household goods,
l reelected the diary, and thought
I'd see If l couldn't dicker for it,
I've just come from Seth's, and
there's the book. I'm going to read
it all through, and then I'm going to
keep it along myself, ,and we'll see
II Zenas Perkins will be the only au-
thority on happenings in Pondtown!"
How much did you pay for that
book?" asked Mrs. Jenkins. 'If
you paid for it by weight it must
have come to considerable"
We'll, paid three and half for
it, 1 offered two, and Seth wanted
Eve, and finally we split the differ
ence"
Three dollars and a half! Well,
I never did" and Mrs. Jenkins re-
tired to the kitchen. leaving her hus-
band to the undisturbed perusual OF
his dearly bought treasure.
When she looked in on him, an
hour later, Caleb was still poring
over the book, but the exultation had
faded from his eyes.
"Alvira," he said, mournfully,
I've spent three dollars and a half
lreadfully foolish"
II guess that's no Dews, Caleb
Jenkins" was the c'4rt reply.
Now Just listen 10 lhis," said Ca
,eb. too much absorbed in his trou-
nle to notice his wjfe's displeasure.
This is one days record: October
the eighteenth. o, the corruption in
high places o. the wirkedness that
s4atfre obroo5f NNa have {,,dnad
fallen upon evil times. l myself am
as prone to evil as the sparks to fly
upward. Rheumatism about as yes
teTtay. Applied skunk's oil. but de-
rived no benefit
There, its just like that, Alvira,
all through the diary. There Is plen-
ty of the old gentleman's reflections
and accounts Of HIS ailments and
what he took for 'em, but there's
nothing about the weather, and I
have not run across a single event
/ yet.
This book isn't wuth a red cent
to me, Alyira," he continued, bitter
ly. "Of course Seth wouldn't take
it back. ! believe I'll heaye it into
the stove"
'Oh, no, Caleb, don't do that"
said the good woman, her heart soft
ened by her husbands detection. Il
need just such a book I'm always
wanting to press leaves and flowers,
you know, and pretty much all of
the books in the house are fan. That
diary will be just the thing. I'm
proper glad you got II, Caleb"