The sun., 1909-02-14
KNOCKERINO WANTS FACT
HE FOR ONE WOULD NOT HURT
ANOTHER MANS CREDIT.


strange Yarns Get Around Abeu
People ana lie IL Glad 70 iblsceyel
That tine OF Them Is Not True
Mr.. Knockerlno walked without knock
ing into the of!ce OF busy acquaintance
deposited himself on the edge OF the busy
scquslntance's desk, lit u cigarette without
asking the typewriter girl whether she liked
Turk smoke aud unfolded himself:
Hay-o. there, old workhorse See
you're working your head on. as usual
Bad habit. Injurious. Ought to relax
Why don't you take little trot down t.
Florida? Or Cuba? Or Porto Ricoi
How's thatP Haven't the time? That's
what they all say. That's -
Oh. say, talking about Florida. die
know that Jim Flittby's gone down therei
That's what heard this morning, and
wish I'd been hard OF hearing at that,
for Jim. Oh. well. | guess Jim'll slip
me the money some old time. but they
tellme that Jim isn't such prompt slipper
as he might be.
Jims all right, guess. and all that.
Jim thinks. imagine. that Just because
he's been having = bit OF trouble With
his wife-huh2 Hadn't heard about Il?
Why, everybody knew all about that.
thought-that he's excusable for over.
looking these little matters. but
BY the way, talking about the domestic
gag. have you heard that Ed Giddap's
wife's gone back to her folks out West
somewhere? Had a wireless on that last
night. Didn't knock me OF the bench
or anything. that news.
kind o. figured right along that sooner
or later Ed would he nailed with the
goods. Ed. you know. had been handing
1t out to his wife for years that his every
night downtown moochings around were
due to the fact that he belonged TO a
whole passel Of lodges md things. but
while ago. 1t seems she sort of wised up
and found that Ed didn't belong to any
other lodge except the Tenderloin Sleep
Duckers Association and the Bed Haters
Society, and from hitting that trail she
got hep TO all the rest of IL. 80 that when
Ed got home TO the fat from his Office one
evening last week he found little Mrs
Helpmatie had done gone away from
here, and Ed went roaring and blubbering
around and telling everybody, including
the janitor and the cop on the beat. about
his troubles. and he only got the hoot.
Of course, which fellow Is bound 10 get
when he becomes bleaty about his family
troubles and all o. that.
General opinion seems to be that Eddie
got just what he's been due for for a
long while. She took the young 'uns
along with her. and that made Ed crazy
Of course. and he's been walloping the
old redeye to beat the band ever since it
happened. and the first thing he knows
he'll be holding down one Of those little !
white cots with the green rabbits doing |
wing dances for him on the footboard.
Say. l see you've got one Of those |
ca lendars Of the San Luis Obispo Gold |
Mining Company stuck up over your
desk. Did you bite on that stun too?
lia, ha! Well. well SO you got busy
with your little nbbler and took a gnaw
IN that bait. heyY Ho. ho
Well. you haven't got anything on me
bought about fourteen pounds Of those
shares for seven cents a share, waiting
or that sure thing rise to 80 cents within
'ixty days. but haven't got IL any more
cave II to your little playmate Ethelbert
,ot 10 have any OF it any more. stuck
lround for about a month with mine
mo then i sold it 10 Jack Sophtsky for
line cents a hare. and ever since then
lack has been stalking me To the Peary
glare every time he's seen me
Don't think. old horse that I'm trying
o tip you Of that Jack is the dandiest
title comeon on the whole Isle Of Man
lattsn. but il you happen-ha. .hal--to
ave any old punkerino certificates for
nything from patent chimney cleaner
o borax mine 10 No Mans Land kicking
round and want to unload the stun why d.
III you've rot to do-ho. ho!--is TO pin .
ack against the wall in some shadowy
orner and tell him what grand paper.
hey are and he'll
Talking about grand papers. | was in ,
little game OF draw the other night,
nd Al Noluck was in the game, aud, say,
ou ought to've seen the cards that
elbow pulled from one end OF the evening
o the other. and yet he was the biggest
oser OF the session.
| never saw such mitts as fell that {
uy's way during that seance. but he
lways caught the fine finfuls when no
ody else had thing, and you could have
card his wailings for blocks. One time i
g picked up a pat straight flush. trey TO ,
he seven OF hearts. and though there =
'ere eight Of US playing nary a one had q
nything worth making it good enough :,
, stick along when Al opened the pot, a
nd talk about the noise the cat animals .
OF out OF their systems when they re .
,ssing raw meat into the cages! Al Just n
ood up in his place and bellered like a I
lll buffalo in a horn to horn scrap with
ie next in line as boss of the herd. Fell =
w hasn't got any right to play cards =
all IL he can't make up his mind >,
, stand the gatf when the n
Say. that girl that does your typewrit- =,
Ig- sh-sh! lower. please -pianissimo- 7
les kind OF e locker, isn't she? Sly =,
og. old boy-naughty. naughty! Leave
10 You not to have any valentines -
-ound you in your hours OF labor. .
But watch out. old top. have a care. a
ave care! Hear about Freddy Cuttupp? v
Tell. Freddy came real close to losing =,
Is happy home and things over that
OF typewriter girl he had =,
his Office till about two weeks ago. n
You see. she came down to the Office one B
orning with a fine and dandy Direc- o
ire dress under her coat. She was 0
,ing to a party or something after Office y
,urs-that's what Freddy said in ex- o
anyhow-that's what they all u
y-and 30 she wore the swell Dlrectoire Il
anarx, 70 tho nHpna .f.'a .ha a