The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1909-08-06
A Midsummer
Day S Dream

!
Lady burst into the Office.
20, girls, hello-I mean-good-
morning - I'm - talking-about! Let
me get my things off There, that's
better. Now, guess what I've donel"
And the Typewriter Lady beamed
about her
Got married"
Got raise"
Got a bargain bat"
mo. you silly children. Something
much better. I've been offered house
in the country for the summer" And
the T. l. seated herself triumphantly
and played a barcarolle on her ma
chine, with variations.
There's "a lady at our boarding
house who owns this lovely old place
in the country. The people she rents
It to are going abroad for the sum-
mer and my sister and | are TO have
it free for the whole season, just for
taking care of it.
We're just waiting for salary day,
so we can buy the few things We'll
need for it. You see it isn't quite
completely furnished-that is, We'll
need a few porch chairs and some
extra table linen, and some bath fix
lures. The bath fixtures are my idea.
| always did have a perfect craze for
bath fixtuyes
You can all come and spend week
ends. Why, | can hardly wait for the
first % the month to buy my COM
mutation ticket. And say, | under
stand there's summer school out
there for young men! Aha, | thought
that'd bring out few sparkles in
dicating interest think it's sort of a
preparatory school where they get
them ready for college-and you know
boys that are being prepared for col
lege usually have fathers who aren't
exactly what you'd call poor. Oh,
have perfectly glorious summer
planned"
81 gay, Hortense," chimed in the One
Practical Girl. have you been out to
see the place."
Not yet. We're going Saturday
afternoon, so as to be there when they
deliver the porch chairs and the linen
and the bathroom accessories.
The One Practical Girl smiled in
scrutably. "Once upon a time" said
she, Il bought suit through seeing
il illustrated in the back of a maya
zine. 1t was a perfectly grand suit-in
the picture. My wash-lady is wearing
it, Every time | see it on her | have
pangs of conscience to think how
made a fellow creature victim to
something | wouldn't tolerate myself.
She has never reproached me in
words. She just persistently wears
the suit-the moral of this tale being
that you never can tell until you see
things" And the One Practical Girl
went on sharpening her lead pencil.
On Monday morning the Typewriter
Lady's desk remained closed The
girls had been breathlessly awaiting
her account OF the country paradise,
of how the porch looked garnished
with its new chairs, of the splendor
of the nickel soap dish. the towel
racks. the OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
m-one-fifty-shower bath, and all the
rest that was to bring summer refresh
ment to the city-worn office ladies.
At noon came HOrtense, wearing the
blank expression of a magician whose
trick has gone awry-who has failed
to make the rabbits come out of the
hat-and who breads the jeers of the
audience. One could see with half an
eye that the tears were being held
back with a mighty effort. The One
Practical Girl slipped her arm swiftly
around her shoulder
Don't you care, Hortense, l bet I
know just exactly what's happened.
Didn't I buy that suit out Of the
magazine? But I say, don't you care.
You can make mp what you're out OF
pocket by having ten-cent lunches,
same as | did for a couple OF months.
and you'll feel all the better for it.
i"
ut isn't the money" walled the
downcast one, half so much as il is
the meanness Of that woman mis-
representing things to me like that.
remember her distinctly mentioning
the tub The tub, 1t makes me rage
when I think of it, Imagine the pic
ture Of my nickel plated soap rack at
tached 10 the side of a disintegrating
wooden washtub and my perfectly
grand patent nozzle shower bath
hooked on TO the branch Of a tree
somewhere, rugged up over the
tub"
"Hortense!!!"
"In a tent, In a tent, of course!
There wasn't any bathroom! And the
porch chairs Oh girls, 1t makes me
weep 10 think OF my beautiful porch
chairs sitting out in the middle OF
the dusty road, being run over every
minute by automobiles! They'd have
to sit there, you see, for there wasn't
any porch! And the front door opened
right on to the road. And as for table
linen! What would be the use Of
table linen If you had to eat canned
food all the time? You could just
make a picnic OF il and have it out
in the woods, or anywhere, for all
they had was a coal stove to cook on,
and I'd rather go without eating than
tO bava IN M 10 frac apJ thin orc avarv