The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-04-22

woman, has . mouth full of gold teeth it's no sign that she will refrain from talking.
 Impossible story beginnings: sud- wifss new nsw sprias S'lns nat ss sniisd D broadly In Arfstook county. Maine. there attend sfs DseDs eOSr su, tss nothns noS enterprising Eastern New. York finan. ciere travel thousands of miles to avofd attending court.
 Little Archie, aged six. l Always up to cunning tricks,
 Kerosene poured In the Auto-nny how
 Dropped in | lighted match,
 On a harp now he plays melodies de-
 Iicious.
 Parson Snowbail says: 'It's easier hickernut wid its teeth den 1t is fo' de average man to put up stove pipe widout cussin' . blue streak s.A 5sssn xsss . s.b ssys ~ n the shSssa sssn. which may be surprising to lots or l people to near that a church is flush l at all. | < orders that no lady wearing a hand l some dress or e new-style peach bas- ket hat should enter his church. In 1 less than fortnight he was preach noshlns ns s1 f@e' iefs so inaScs the Women attend. ,8k
 There Is nothing like leather. said Old Aristophanes: Aristi ,s,nes exiasntlyy " boarding house steak. A firm in Newark manufactures ar tincial eggs with plaster of n,, Paris ss to compete with the industrious little hen who keeps the price up. In Armenia girls are married at the obtain three or four divorces and thus become admirably equipped for bril- liant stage success in America. A Phiaiieiphia man wrote s44 words on q post card to a lady in Canada. She replied on the same size card with f14 words. Determined not to be outdone he wrote again 1.003 words on 8 post card. Tho lady went him sev- time with i.s2s words all plainly writ. ten. and easily read without the aid of any sort of rnagnifying glass. You can't get ahead of . woman when 1t comes to words. don't care how hard A pocket storm. indicator has been invented. Married men who frequsnt themselves with one. to be prepared for the blowing up they will get when they crawl into bed at the unearthiy hour of a. m
 At. g fair in sanfefd. Conn, the peo- pie are voting a silk hat to the mean est man in the. county. We don't envy the winner of that prize little bit. speaking of .,macaiamized pike" well, you find them sometimes on boarding house tables all right all right.
 Do you recall how you and she
 once hung on the old front gate. Tn the twilight beneath the stars
 Until the hour grew late?
 As you looked into her iove-ht eyes That you broke the hinges off that
 And made her old dad swear.
 It is said that the Treasury Depart ment intends to materially beautify the dollar bill Impossible. The dol- 1t looks now that even Christy paint tu&e 8fuh fNh0 0fkuo18HhhS9hcS OSSiu0 ie.
 .rhis Is tiss age of stssi" says an exchsnke Of ecurss, but why that typogfaphic&l error n the apeiling of the woras \ eFxe
 old Monts5n 9is amQt t4ered in fragranceEb6 rcsea Afi9 h4tK deaf ened in a warblifiE aof bifi nnsiodies. while the sun has gone mad in a pas sion of joy at kissing our beautiful blue blondes.
 The government has seized Mary land distiliery with 5000 barrels of whiskey. Is this to give Mfr. Taft 8 chance to answer the question recent ly put to him of 'sWhat Is Whiskey7" si'-, i. s.. Ss,-. + D. z s,sg, Creek Dreams. M Dreamin' ob de swish t-- Ob de line whar I would fish Elf had someone, toe dig de bait Dat am my only wish.
 o golly I kin heah de creek eallin' me to cum. Froo miles O meadow daises whaf de bees am all hum. rse gwine toe git my fishin' pole an trabble on my way Fo' Tse felt de fishin' fever an rse goin' dar today.
 Dreamin' ob de swish | Ob de line whar I would fish Elf had someone toe dig de bait Dat am my only wish. p H A