Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1909-12-11

around here are doing to that magistrate.
Probably the magistrate, in exuding that
little spiel, figured that he was going to
make a big hit with the women folks:
hit that might help him in no small
degree the next time he came up for
the magistrates job
If he figured it that way. however, he
wants to go buy himself another copy
of Robinson's Arithmetic for New Begin
ners. Because, you see, his figures were
way, OH way, way off.
The women are writing him scores ana
hundreds of letters asking him what ne
means. sir? Just like that: What do
you mean by saying such perfectly
idiotic thing. sir?'' They are inquiring
of him, in this hopelessly large mass OF
correspondence, II he thinks men are
crazy? If he thinks men have no rights
at all? if he thinks men. after WORKING
hard all the week. haven't the right to
pinch out 10 or Is cents for emseives
for little diversion before handing the
entire roll over to the women folks! ana
a whole lot more asks Of that general
character. The women, you see, CONFORM
ing to their age-old custom, turn right
smack-dab around and defend the men as
soon as they think their men are getting
a little bit the worst of the Jumplng-on.
It's just like the fate of the fellow who
imbecilely seeks to interfere in scrap
between man and wife: he not only has
the man on his hands then, but the wife
turns around and rips off whatever
chunks Of his pelt she can manage TO
reach with her long. finely manlcured
finger nails.
There are, of course, slews OF women
over here who are handing the magis-
trate the applauseful mitt for his pro-
nouncement about what ought to be done
with that Saturday night pay envelope,
but these don't come anywhere near
counterbalancing the writeful and spite
full ones who are using the United States
mails wherewith to inform the magis-
tratr exactly what thev think OF MS
name hammock hook and mess number
Oh, well! Magistrates have been max
ing mistakes ever since the days OF Dog
berry. and they'll go right on making
'em until the death of the dog star But
this particular magistrate appears to
have most egregiously inserted his pedal
In it, wherefore We are, really, quite not
sorry for him.
x/OU'LL have been reading a great
] deal of misleading drivel during the
past few months about the matrimonial
plans that George Gould and his wife,
Mrs. Edith Gould, that was Edith King
don, the actress, have for their daugh-
ter Marjorie.
But it is not. of course, compulsory that
YOU should believe any of that drivel, and
the chances are, / think, about nineteen
any of II.
The yarns have had it that George
Gould is highly complaisant over the fact
that large and ornate batch of more or
less financially busted princes. grand
jocks, comics this and counts and Wis
counts that have been making over
lures to Mr.. Gould for the hand of his
daughter Marjorie.
You'll recall that Miss Marjorie Gould,
young lady now eighteen years Of age.
is coming out this season; and no doubt
you have seen many pictures in news
papers and magazines of her. She comes
SO nightly close to being quite the most
beautiful young woman in this part of
he world, at any rate, that the newspa-
pers and magazines have been amply
justified in frequently republishing her
picture.
But Miss Marjorie Gould is not going
to marry any of these betitled coin
searchers.
/ have this on the direct authority of
a man who Is one OF the most intimate
friends of George Gould himself
Mr.. Gould has not, you will recall, any
particular reason to feel joyous over the