The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-07

Literary Press.)
HUNOR OF THE DAY
.oThev saw that a man designed the
waste basket hat while on a big spree
It understand the fall model Is even
y %o hat While he was SOLDERING up?-
Louisville Courier Journal.
brought you to this? Sandy. Spikes-Me
feet, mum Yer didn't hfLa t taRicab ~ ala
you?-Chicago Tribune.
my husband has been out late every
clnb meetings yes SO has mine-they
n .HSy how 10 ro oueer ' NV husband says he
hasn't seen your husband this summer.
Cleveland Leader.
(which do you like best" said Meander-
ing Mike, de city orde country ell:
adGnr "a dc houses in town makes it
convenient. But likes de country because
deres just about Ta t6en en6 6s5d- oU
Washington Star.
Bung-So you have succeeded in tracing
back my ancestors? What is your fee2
Geneaiogist-Twenty guineas for keep
ing quiet about them.-Casselrs Saturday
JOhLhoA.
Fat Man-Whati Are you going to let
boy have his fun for once. 1t is his
birthday, sir.-Fliegende Blaetter.
How can one become a conversational
list? 1T ought to be easy in your case.
Just start on 9y .men1,4,a av "hS ougyi Sgr
Journal
Traveler-rve been all over the world
and I've met OQlX two really D6auLlINl
women. Totty-And pray who was the
other Philadelphia Inquirer.
sweet young thing NO" replied the
er fashionable disease that I haven't had
Detroit Free Press.
Bob Footlight (actor)-Failure? I should
think it wasl The whole play was ruin
Footiight-At the end of the last act a
steam pipe burst and Kissed me off the
stage.-London Tit-Bits.
Said She-Did you leave your heart be
hind you at the seashore last summer?
was Sslg my trunkHchicagso Daily News e-''u
First Kid-De umpire in de big baseball
Second Kid-Yes. but den it ali goes for
life insurance.-New York Telegraph.
IF you'd assume a more genial man
ner. you'd get along better in business.
"Rotl 1 tried it once, and everybody
met wanted to borrow money.'-Cleve-
land Leader.
He says he's your friend TO, If.
But he's o not him for fTend n f9f pnx
PPonisV Vi eSe cou Ii al pay '
Mrs. Hutton-we are oranizing a piano
FIatieigh-With pleasure. Mrs. Hutton.
What pianist do you propose to club firsts
Chicago Daily News.
Visiting Missionary-Are the spiritual
of the dd se fo
in ni'i for iiquor.@New York Herald.
'That man made an immense fortune
out of a simple little invention" Indeed!
What did he fnvent?' Invent? Nothing,
you dub! He was the promoterY'-Cleve-
land Leader.
quate tip)-Good night, Mister Mcpherson.
All shall remember ye when We come this
All m comm this way agin.-Sketch.
Haven't you a h!s9qme??," asked the sym
ding Pete. II had a nice home; but de
first ting I knew it had woodpile and
a garden and a pump. And den it got
Washington Star.
Ma, what are the fOlkS IN our church
gettin' up a subscription fer?' ITO send
minister on a vacation to Europe this
summer won't there be no church SER
vices while he's gomez" mo. dear" Ma,
I got S123 in my bank-can 1 give that?''-
Cleveland Leader.
when you do tell a le.'' remarked
Hamlet Fatt, tell an elaborate ne." II
don't know about that said Yorlck
Hamm. Following that policy would
have lost me the job I just got' How
sop "A manager wanted to know IL
had ever played Richelieu. 1 never have,
but said yes. IT was about to say that
1 originated the part.'-Louisville Cour-
ier-JOurnal