davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
QUAKER MEDITATTONs.

[From the Philadelphia Record1
Lots of alleged golden opportunities
wouldn't stand the acid test
Printers ink enters largely into tho
composition of the modern hero.
The man who appropriates a coat-of.
arms would rob a clothesline.
The man who can get no one to do
ms bidding would make a poor auc-
tioneer.
The minute woman's dresses beEi
to feel comfortable she knows she is
losing flesh.
The fellow who treats his mule better
than he treats his wife doesn't deserve
to have either.
When a small boy washes his hands
and face without being told he has deep
designs on his parents. s
After she passes 80 woman may still
observe her birthdays, but she doesn't
want other people to.
A girl may be said to experience a
change of heart when she iiIts one fei-
low and becomes engaged to another
Fine feathers don't make fine birds
Quoted the Wise Guy. mo. not unless
they entail big BILL" added the Sim
pie Mug
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
JZYHAWKER JOTS

IT, says the Marion Record. you
only had the other fellows job.
wouldn't you show him how to do it,
According to the Kansas City Star
ne of the recent song hits at Howard
is entitled 81 Want to Be a Man Like
Ma"
Among the recent visitors which the
Osawatomie Graphic claims to have
had was the celebrated tramp printer,
Mr.. Eaton B. Going.
This is styled by Charlie Blakesley
as prohibition news from Larned:
miss Eva Beer has begun the erection
of two story brick building
That Beloit pastors wife who has
left home to take the lecture field
against the growing evil of divorce,
might wake up some morning to find
a bill filed against her for desertion.
Stranger things than that have hap
pened.
Evidently Mrs Lucena Axtell of
Newton, is sorely in need Of a change
of diet. She told the Eighth District
Federation of Women's clubs, in ses-
sion recently, at Wichita, that Our
cattle and our hogs are better fed
than our families"
1t occurs to the Emporia Gazette
that the good old Junction City Union
believes in the meilowing influences
of old age. ''It runs a column of Kan
sas notes." says the Gazette, land no
items OF news IS ADMITTED unless II
is six months DID,
In response to the question, DO
hogs pay?" the Kansas City Star
credits Kansas editor as replying:
"a good many do not. They take the
aper for several years and then have
the postmaster send it back marked
Refused or Gone West
The Emporia Gazette, presumably
via Walt Mason, sizes up the recent
exchanges between the contesting
candidates for the next congressional
honors in the First district: IF Buff
foon meets Poltroon coming through
the rye; if Buffoon swat Poltroon,
need Poltroon cry"
Unusual though it may seem, the
Central Branch has a friend. 1t is
rome other than the Cawker City
Ledger which defends this much ma
iigned railroad with great vigor. The
Ledger declares there are many worse
roads Will the Ledger be little
more specific and name a few of
them?
A good point is made by the Anthony
Republican as follows: And while
advocating the simpler life. is there
any good reason why the school board
CIR faculty of the high school should
/ ermit or encourage graduating ex-
travagance that has obtained in the
Last? With cut flowers, banquets,
CLAWS. engraved invitations and fussy
clothes the cost per scholar for the
final exercise of the senior class of the
high school has averaged right at 500.
The question is not so much of afford
ing It. but is it worth while? Does it
not develop and encourage extrava-
gance and money estimates that are
totally wrong and yet may continue
through life?"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Experience is generally teacher of
stern mien.
x X x
The automobile takes more money
to make it go than the mare does.
X
Feminine fashions appear to be run
ming these days to the odd and the
queer instead of to the beautiful.
X X X
Many folks would get along better
if they depended more on their own
resources and not so much on the help
of friends"
y X X
Women are given all the medals for
incessant talking but few of them
properly belong on the breasts of
many of the men.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
GLOBE SIGHTS.
From the Atchison Globe. ]

IFrom the Atchison Globe.1
What has become of the old-fash-
toned woman who called them bat
ter cakes?"
A good many important events oc-
cur in the course of a year, but very
ing.
It is good thing to have a large
number in a church choir: it makes
it so much easier when they divide the
blame.
When guests are asked to register
at a little hotel, they always feel that
the proprietor insists upon it largely
out of curiosity.
When a newcomer has fine clothes.
some of the women are apt to say:
s'She has beautiful clothes, but they
are dirty. and years out OF style
A few people say baby never cries
unless something hurts it. But the
great majority know that babies fire.
quently cry because they are mad.
A Kansas City man is like con-
gressman: when he visits in Atchison,
he tries not to show that he considers
himself superior, but he can't hide it.
Observe long enough the man who
complains that luck is against him, and
you will note that luck is in collusion
with laziness, carelessness, impoiite-
ness, intemperance, or some. other
comfortable fault
A man lately said in crowd of wo-
men: ct don't believe I could raise
a baby; it would kill me-" Whereupon
one of the women said: Women ike
it: it is not hard for them" But am
talking" the man said, "of a MAN
raising baby
We don't think much more of de-
tectives than We think Of bloodhounds.
In the case of Earl Bullock. the IS
year-old boy who robbed Kansas
hank the detectives could not find
him. And when he came back and
robbed the bank a second time, it was
farmer who chased him SO closely
that he killed himself.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Some model fire escapes are to be
placed on the new WASHINGTON school
building for colored children at
Tenth and Washington streets. This
is excellent. But what is the matter
with placing the same sort of fire es-
capes on all the other school houses
in the city which need them?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

President Tafts Thanksgiving proc
iamation was unusually late in making
its appearance, but there is evidently
going to be no dilatoriness among the
governors in following suit. Presuma-
hly all of the governors have had their
effusions ready and have been sitting
or anxious seat for some time.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Champ Clark. Missouris famous
Democrat. feels confident that there
will be a Democratic president elected
i'm 1912 Similar feelings have been en-
ioyed for the past II years by Mr..
Bryan and quite a large company of
democrats.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
From the \

from the New York Press.1
A man and his wife have ouarrels
SO she can tell everybody they never
do.
The longer people live in fiat the
more they deserve to have taste If
real life before they die.
It's awful hard to forgive anybody
Tor being so nice there's nothing about
him that needs forgiving.
It's a funny thing how the most
NIcious person would rather be
tnougnt a scoundrel than a fool.
The average man is so unfatr
won even give sermon the cref9tt
OF having helped him to take a nap.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Senator Aldrich continues to fool elm
He had nothing but the most courteous
Of illusions to make to Senator Cum
nins. of Iowa, one of the leading i'll
,urgents. in a speech he delivered IL
.ian latter'S home town.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

IT is reasonable to assume that the
millennium is approaching as far as
Chicago is concerned. The street rail-
way company there has issued new
code of rules which insists that its en-
nloves must be polite to passengers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago Ne,

lfrom the Chicago News.J
1t is human nature to act inhuman v
occasionally.
How many men do you know who do
just as they please?
There are lots of great men-unt:I
you get close to them.
Lots of women do odt things for the
purpose of getting even
Some disappearance are less .decen.
tive than some appearances
The pleasure Is all yours when the
other fellow hands you money.
The privileges desired are what tina
average woman calls her rights
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

notwithstanding his vigorous dcmur-
rers, all of which were in vain, Cover
nor Haskell. of Oklahoma, will have to
stand trial in the federal courts on
criminal charges of being a party to
securing from the government, through
fraud, title to large number of town
lots in Muskogee. This is an unusual
predicament for a governor of one of
the United States to find himself in.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

one of Kansas own peculiar prod
nets. Buffalo Jones. is going to Africa
to lasso and tie with his own hands
specimen Of every dangerous wild ami
NAL on that continent. At least. those
HE MI
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

If the Central Branch railroad could
make a half million dollars last year
with its present roadbed and equip
ment, what might it not be able to earn
if it's property were put in the best
possibIe condition?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

1t is to be noticed that prize hght
promoters from states where there IS
no possibility of pulling off a mill OF
an unlimited number of rounds are Of
fering the largest purses for the john
con Teffries fight
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

1t ought to strike most persons as
something of bad form for former Gov
srnor Hoch to go parading around the
country telling governors OF other
states what he would do If he happen
ID to be in their shoes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

In all probability some time will
elapse before the aeroplane gets in lhs
pigeon class. One of the latter BIRDS
recently Travelled 900 miles from kan
sas City TO a point in Colorado in 81
hours
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

The suggestion that the scarcity o.
ministers opens the way for the admls-
sion to pulpits of women also provides
a possibility that will probably increase
The church attendance among the men.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

The miniature mountains Oh nluu
which the Edison company nave plieu
up at Karsas and Eighth avenues nave
all the earmarks of being permanent
decorations
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
HUNOR OF THE DAY

What is it, hubby?'
II wish you would drop around at the
market MAJ today and inspect a steak that I
can cal at at my offIss and wen sign the trans
so your husband promised you he
would never play cards except for fun?''
doubtfully:. but he afterward d expiained
that he didn't consider it any fun uniesS
money nvolved uWssshnrte 5ne star way OF
Unsophisticated visitor-why do 50
man Of your best people play what they
Society Leader-oh. just to make the
Unsophisticated visitor-I see-time is
money.-Chicago Tribune.
with her small friend Elizabeth, when
suddenly she said, II guess I'll hat to go
What for?' asked Betty. with a good
deal Of concern.
my e tS% back
Home Companion.
Quite recently warship of the Atlantic
Squadron found it necessary to cali for a
dsw 1r nonrs at military port on the coast
full bearded Irish tar in the ' street e a eou-
pie of hours later. said:
Pat when ne, are are you going to place your
civil list" was the irish sailors reply"
Tit-Bits.
Scott-Is Jones married?
bae his guess fe not for never heard him
| Transcript.
| she-Well. you married me with your
| .He-Yes. and I haven't closed them
since.-St. Louis Times.
Cd. DO you think can stand an opera
ter than I do.'-Houston Post.
Herr schulzer-I am trying to make
Newly Knighted Parvenu-Ah, he won't
talk to ordinary people now.-Neggen-
Hyker-Have you heard the results OF
the baseball game today?
,Hyker.whieh won-the home team or
the umpire.-Chicago News.
THAT. my dear" said the husband.
WHO had been suppins not wisely. but too
well, was a real soul kiss
ing coldly- from his embrace, from the
amount of spirit I notice in it.-London
II see your farmers are all buying auto
w
land you can believe it or not, but my
| hired man has developed enough energy
to be pinched for speeding. kansas City
Journal.
| Stella-Parallel lines never meet
: Knicker-How about a kiss New York
Sun.
Alice in Wonderland said she could
easily believe six impossible things before
breakfast
How fitted for ciubman's wife,
| they exclaimed.
Sad to relate. however. she missed hex
obvious destiny.-New York Times
MY husband has been out late every
evening this week attending important
club meetings."
| Yes, SO has mine-they belong to the
why. how queer! Ny husband says he
| hasn't seen your husband this sumner
| Cleveland Leader.
Which do you like best" said Meand-
erln 1sl Nike: ,n de city or de country a..
| closeness togedder of de houses in town
makes 1t convenient. But likes de
country because dere's just about walkin'
!; enough to give you an appetite between
down"
Yes. and the janitor sassed me today
vile Courier-Journal.
They say that a man designed the
| wastebasket hat while on a big Spree
worse
did he have the nerve to design a hat
while he was. SOLDERING up?'-Louisvilie
Courier Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Government experts have just recent
" discovered the important fact that
denatured alcohol mas the same power
So gasoline as a fuel.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is member OF me
Associated Press and receives the tuIL Gay
telegraph report OF that great news or
sanization for the exclusive aIternoon
publication in Topeka.
The news is received IN me re- S's Sole mr.
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

drop around to my Office tomorrow.
guess we can fix up that deal OF
yours. I think 1t will be a good thing
for both of us."-(Copyright, 1908,
by Associate Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

1T is a long distance from .fiirta-
ton on the corner of State and Adams
streets to what has become infamous
at Newport and on the Riveria,' said
the Rev. Frederick E. Hopkins, pastor
of the Pilgrim Congregational church
of Chicago in a recent sermon, but He
who looks down from heaven has Civ
en- but one name to the whole road,
and that name is destruction. When
fiirtations become less common, popu-
lar and fashionable, the number of
tlaSted homes will diminish.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

The mine disaster at Cherry, Ill, is
almost too terrible an affair to contem-
plate A few days ago that town was
a prosperous little community filed
with happy families. Now there are
200 widows and thousand fatherless
children who have no one to turn to
for help. If aid is needed outside of
Illinois that fact should lie made
known. The response will be generous.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

,Hyker-Have you heard the results OF
the baseball game today?
Pyker-Yes
Hyker-Which won-the home team or
the un1pire.-Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

:. DO you think I can stand an opera
tion doctor?''
You know your financial condition bet
ter than 1 do."-Houston Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

She-Well, you married me with your
eyes OPEN
He-Yes. and I haven't closed them
since.-St. Louis Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Herr Schubert am trying to make
your parrot. talk. but he won't.
Newly knighted Parvenu-Ah, he won {
talk to ordinary people now-Meggen-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Scott-Is Jones married?
Mott guess not. I never heard him
blame his wife for anythfng.-Boston
Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

That my dear" said the husband.
WHO had been supping not wisely, but too
Wei, was real soul kiss
so judge said the wife, withdraw
ing coldly from his embrace, from the
amount of spirit I notice in it.-London
Tit-Bits.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

Quite recently a warship of the Atlantic
Squadron found 1t necessary to call for a
few hours at military port on the coast
of Ireland. Tommy Atkins. meeting a
full-bearded Irish tar in the street a cou-
pie of hours later, said:
Pat when are you going to place your
Whlskers on the reserve list?''
When you place your tongue on the
civil list was the Irish sailors reply
Tit-Bits.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

mobiles
I'VE are admitted Farmer WhifrIetree.
and you can believe it or not, but nv
hired man has developed enough energy
to be pinched for speeding. kansas City
Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-11-17

MY husband has been out late every
evening this week attending important
club meetings."
Yes, SO has mine-they belong to the
same club, you know :,
why. how queer! Ny husband says he
hasn't seen your husband this summer
Cleveland Leader.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-08

Twelve miles to ana across the I.e-vj-
s:can ana up the bluffs cn the soG,h
side. where they acted in their usual
aggravating style by scattering iii
every objection after dropping Il coed
deal of plumber. We could see them
On the distant hill. hut could net catr1
them under the circumstances or with
out means of some counter strategic
cunning. so we went back ard camp
ed north cf the Republican. The adj
vance guard had been relieved and
the Indians severely punished with q
loss on our side of but four or five
killed ard few wounded, this with
Babcocks horse wounded and CCdy's
narrow escape as the resulting casual
ties. The object of the campaign was
nearly accomplished, but cur greatest
need was supplies. which the hot trail
had side:racked in the excitement of
the necessary pursuit of the defiant
foe. AS the country was infested With
Indians and it was fifty miles to the
nearest supply point, Fort Kearny, OH
consultation with Cody Ee decided that
it would be best to undertake the job
himself. point characteristic of him.
as he never shirked duty or faltercd
in emergencies. | gave him the best
morse in the outfit and when twilight
arrived he decided, after patching up
his head Il little, to bring relief and
meet us at a point northwest on the
Platte river. about days march on
ward These were about the most
definite directions any scout got in the
| trackless wastes of those days, and it
showed the peculiar sixth sense or
acumen possessed by experienced OFF,
GERS and why practical scouts. like
Cody, in the wide terrestrial seas of
the great plains rarely ever missed
: connections. Cody therefore reached
us safely. making a successful ride OF
| fifty miles during the night and ar
| irving at Fort Kearny at daylight"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-08
Neighborhood Favorite.

Mrs. e. d. Charles of Harbor, Maine,
speaking of Electric Bitters, says: ut
is neighborhood favorite here with
US" 1t deserves to be a favorite
everywhere. 1t gives quick relief in
dyspepsia, liver complaint. kidney de-
,rangement,. malnutrition. nervousness,
weakness and general debility. Its &C
ton on the blood, as a thorough puri.
fer makes it especially useful as a
spring medicine. This grand alterna
tive tonic is sold under guarantee at
all druggists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-08

Vegetable Compound has doae for me
during this trying period. Complete
restoration to health means SO much
TO me that for the sake of other suffer-
ing women j am willing to make my
trouble public so you may publish
this letter" MRS. CIFAs. BARCLAY,
R.F. D., Graniteville, VT.
No other medicine for woman's ills
has received such widespread and I'M
qualified endorsement. No other med
icine we know of has such record
of cures of female ills as has Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.
For more than 80 years it has been
curing female complaints such as
Inflammation, liberation, local weak
nesses, fibroid tumors, irregularities,
periodic pains, backache, Indigestion
and nervous prostration, and it is
unequalled for carrying women safely
through the period of change of life.
1t costs but little to try Lydia b.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, and,
as Mrs. Barclay says, tbs worth noun
tains Of gold " to suffering women.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-02-08

hCICNtCi.
nor reach them, as they were sur
rounded by Indians. The Indians had
got into four ravines which headed
near the trail, two on each side. The
half dozen had led the advance ou
with insulting gestures and defiant
words some could speak and swear In
English. and when they came between
the ravines the whole poured out
around them. Babcock dismounted his
men and formed them In circle ard
stood the Indians of. l sent Lieuten-
ant Brady with the next company to
open communications. and the Indians
surprising the whole command was
coming. went on as before.
Reaching the scene, we could see
the Indians scattering In retreat. A
figure with apparently red cap rose
slowly on the HILL For an instant II
puzzled me. as 1T wore buckskin and
had long hair. But on seeing the
horse l recognized that 1t was Cody's
Powder Face and saw that it was
Buffalo Bill without his broad brim
med sombrero. On closer inspection
I cav that his head was swathed in q
bloody handkerchief, which served Iot
only as temporary bandage. but as o
chapeau, his hat having. been shot of
the bullet blowing his scalp badly fci
about five inches. 1t had ridged alons
the bone and was bleeding profusely
very close call. but a lucky escape
However It would not do to turn bach
Immediately after such impudep:e, 80
took to the gallop and ran them FOL