davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
THEIR HARD LUCK.

Here is a Phil May story In his youth he worked on the Bulletin of Sydney, Australia Occasionally the young man would be assigned by the Bulletin people to the police courts, and from these he would bring back sketches, now humorous and now pa thetic, that were admirable.
 One of the best of the Bulletin sketches hangs in the library of MT. Chamberlain. It portrays thin, hang dog man in the prisoners dock, talk ing to a very mild and sympathetic looking judge, MT. Mays story of the sketch is that the prisoner had been dragged before the judge every few months for number of years.
 Your face is familiar here," the latter now said.
 Tt is, your honor-worse luck." re- turned the prisoner.
 Are you married yet?"
 Not yet, sir
 Not yet, eh? How long is it now that you have been engaged?'
 Seven years, your honor.'
 So long as that? Why in the world haven't you got married in all that Hmat'
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
AND THE EFFORT TO OVER THROW THE PRESENT SYSTEM.
Opponents Among the Officers of the Navy Anxious to Have a Re- organization of the
 Service.

There has existed in the navy for tagonsm to the bureau system of the service, but it was only recently that this widespread mutter of discontent reached the open cry of revolt AS a result of it there was an investigation at the hands of the senate naval con- mittee, which led to nothing, but which went to prove the statement, so long maintained by so many of the service, that the bureau system has become so interlocked with politics that there is no separating the two.
 But the matter would not down, and last summer there was a notable gath ering at the Naval War college in Newport, congress composed of every available navy officer whose duties permitted him to attend It was concession to the critics, but it's con- clusion was as lame and impotent as was that of the senate investigation.
 The senate inquiry and the Newport conference were the direct result of a series of attacks which had been di- rected against the bureau system by number of naval officers These were not disgruntled over any private griey- ances against the bureaus: they were not malcontents in the general accept ance of the term. On the other hand, they were intensely patriotic men. highly competent in their profession, and earnestly striving for the better ment of the service
 Nor is it to be supposed that the in dependents, as they have been styled, have been alone in their attacks on the bureau system. As long ago as 1885 the late William c. Whitney, who was then secretary of the navy, pointed cut the faults of the system in re- port that is still regarded as the most clear, specific and rigorous arraign- ment of the system that has yet em- ployeG type. With characteristic ener- gy he then concentrated his efforts to obtain remedial legislation.
 The present distribution of authori- ty shows that there is no legal provi- sion for any technical officer upon whom would devolve the responsibility of the military efficiency of the navy it's preparedness for war. the sole ob- ject for which it is maintained
 It is insisted that all congress needs to do to perfect the existing admins istrative system is to reestablish the missing balance wheel that was re- moved in 1S42 to give the secretary a board of four seagoing officers, ad- mirals and captains, to retain office at
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
IN BALMY BERMUDA

member tales of blockade runners, during the civil war. and how these islands, hemmed in by their natural fortification of coral reefs. whose only safe entrances were known to the few mariners, served as a transshipping point for contraband goods from both north and south. There are many caves along the rugged shores, that you mean to explore if you can get time. What do you know? You may find a treasure hidden there genera tions ago by those wild and lawless men.
 The road on which you spin is smooth as floor, and here and there you pass through a deep cut where jagged coral walls. topped by dark shrubbery, leave but narrow, twist ing ribbon of blue above you where the sky looks down. Again you skirt the top of gentle hill, and look down across vista of rich farmland. A strange aspect it presents, all divided up into small green patches with rocky bits between and great dark cedars fringing the crests of hills or shading the rich bottoms. Against the sky, calm and serene, rise three stately palms. and as" you turrea bend in the road you see more and more of them. And all among the green. green vegetation of the valley are the little white houses with their green blinds, as trim and neat as a dolls village. They are made of the coral rock sawn into squares in the quarry you will pass on your way. The rock Is soft and cuts almost like cheese when it is taken from the bed, but it hardens into a cement-like hardness and en- dures forever apparently. And as you ride. there to the left of you wrinkles the old ocean, now hiding behind a bluff or thick grove, and then shim- mering forth again, blue and beautiful. Possibly you leave your wheel by the roadside and go down to the beach to see the cauldrons, as they are called These are queer, coral forma- tions like great kettles, into which the tide rushes and retreats with the ap- pearance of boiling up from the still seas.
 It was in 1909 that Sir George Somers landed on Bermuda.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
FAVORED LAND WHERE WINTER IS LIKE SUMMER IN AMERICA.
The Islands of White and Green, Set in a Circle of Blue Sea, Are the Delight of Native and
 Traveller,

It is in Bermuda as perhaps no. where else that the sky is soft and blue. and a gentle breeze laden with the smells of the sea beach comes to you through cedars and across fields of lilies. You have started out early on your bicycle, say. and determined to see something of the islands.
 If all the stories you have read of the islands are true, there is much to see. Of course, you have looked over Washington Irving's essay in which he tells of the Three Kings who were wrecked on these islands and found a huge mass of ambergris, quarreled over 1t, and two were about to fight, when the third hid the weapons. The treasure was confiscated by the com pany which then owned the islands, so that when their ship called. the three kings were none the richer for their contested wealth. You have heard of Tom Moore, the poet who spent much time here. and who had a house in Bermuda, which Is still point ed out to the visitor You have heard oA tLC tuSOoh uSlOoo AAlSh thC oih6Ot rowed his boat of an evening to call upon his lady at the other side. Then there are all those stories of how Sir George Somers first drifted ashore on the islands that up to that time had been spoken of in whispers as inhab- ited by wicked spirits whose chief joy was to wreck the little vessels that winged thither. Back to Shake speare's day goes your thought, to the supcrstitious old mariner who re- turned to his native village all wealth erbeaten, to recount his adventures to an awe-stricken audience of home bodies. Shakespeare heard of the "vexed Bermoothes, and his active imagination wove, from the threads of hearsay, that weird and beautiful! story of The Tempest" Again you re-
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
Solitude and Society.

At the opposite poles of our inner being are two imperative needs. One Is for solitude, the other for society
 Women never reach their best devel
 oDment if they live in loneliness or if they spend their whole lives in the social whirl, writes Margaret E. Sang
 stcl in Woman's Home Companion
 For our souls growth in goodness we require time in which to be alone. To the busy mother with her little ones around Ter, to the woman who prepares three meals day, to third who is driven by social engagements, it seems idle to insist that she shall have an hour or two by herself be-
 tween sunrise and sunset. Without this little space of quiet, let it be ever so hard to attain, let me tell my sister that she will cease to thrive mentally and spiritually. She must think enough about herself to claim this privilege and hold it fast; but no one should shut herself up and live apart from her neighbors unless neighbors are so remote that to reach them she must drive miles across country
 In this case the best plan is to find society ill books and to cultivate in the family a habit of playing games and uniting in evening amusements.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
Religion in Business.

The difficulty of living as a Christian should was expressed last week by a young stenographer employed in a large Cleveland business house.
 You can't live as Christ did and be an employe of a large firm,' the young woman said
 Sunday she attended the mass meeting Of young Christians at Ep- worth Memorial church. She was one of the 1,500 who stood up, promising to live for the next two weeks as Christ would. Two days of the ex- pertinent convinced her of it's impos- sibility ill Cleveland business life.
 ''It can't be done by an employe." !" she said. "The employer himself might carry the morality of Christ into his business if he chose But the employa-at least, in my case-does not, and it is suicidal for the employe to attempt it. Christ's morality and business tact clash. An employe in sisting upon rigid honesty would be discharged instantly.
 T don't mean say my firm is dis honest Along broad lines it isn't But the managers resort to many evasions O. the truth in order to escape un. pleasant consequences"
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19

visitors increases every season. At most of the lodges whites are cordially welcomed and treated with every con- sideration. It is unfortunate, however, that members of the Superior" race so often show themselves inferior to the untutored aborigines in good man. ners. The average white man and white woman seem entirely unable to comprehend that even an Indian is a human being and peer and pry into secret places and private affairs in a way that is very likely to call forth a merited, but always dignified, rebuke. The Indian finds it hard to tolerate the impertinence and soulless curios- ity of the average tourist, and some. times makes known his displeasure by means of dramatic pantomimes that are rather terrifying to persons who see realistic imitation of scalp lift. ing performed for the first time
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19

until changed by order of the presi- dent.
 As for the assertion that there is no legal provision for any technical officer upon whom would devolve the responsibility for the military eff ciency of the navy, I respectfully sug- gest that technical officers are provid- ed in the heads of bureaus and the CO., ordination of the work of these bu- reaus provided for by the establish ment of the board of construction con siSting of five line officers of high rank. Further, that the present organ ization of the department consists. first, of the secretary and of the gen eral board, whose duties are pre- scribed in the regulations and which has to do with the military and per sonnel side of the navy, and of the board of construction, which has to do with the material side as it affects the design, construction and repair of yes sels. The chief of the bureau of navi- gation acts as the chief naval adviser of the secretary of the navy, and all military orders are issued through him, and on important matters after receiving the advice of the general board, of which he is a member
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
AXE 70 THE FAIRS

mission to the camp ground was col lected from all visitors.
 Every morning at ten o'clock the parade was formed. The leader of the parade was the herald of the old chief Plenty Coos, head chief of the Crow nation, who followed carrying a large American flag. The old war chief was conspicuous by the absence of barbaric trappings, wearing no in- signia of the warpath. excepting a white eagle feather in his hair How ever, his followers were not so mod est. Gorgeous war bonnets, belts and savage regalia covered horses and rid CTS. giving the scene picturesque ness that thrilled the hearts of many old-time plainsmen who witnessed it.
 The vast majority of those who at- tend the fairs of the Crow nation are Indians, although the number of white
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
iENPEck's EXPLANATION.

l9 I stand around and toe Ciark the way I do? or lo 1t :that I cannot go S6, tosthe club with you? ,aswer's very simple, friend, !, k,eehould not be surprised. ought it out unto the end cas me hypnotized. IA morn when it Is cold. , eds me light the fire, M do as I am told. r. tpfousc her ire.
 cross her in her whims, K We're ill-advised;
 usater strength in all my limbs, Then, I'm hypnotized. |, he 0utside porch I smoke, wffe of mine to please; .bu what. it is no joke.
 Ind With trembling knees
 tng what has kept you late,
 yne Who is despised;
 son. though. I'm free to state,
 as me hynotized. bort and I am very tall. weak and am strong;
 for nothing counts at all, ]. woman says you're wrong. " wrdp;s-that's all there is to it. }. get exercised. Vi&better to submit, -6 nc hynotized.
 Detroit Free Press.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
HE MOUNTAIN LION

ferS to move. But the greatest diff culty in the way of hunting him by ordinary methods lies in the fact that he almost never goes by day from his lair in cave or dense thicket Often, when he has gorged himself on COW or deer, he will lie for three or four days without seeking food or drink. His ability to endure hunger and thirst is remarkable, particularly in the arid regions, where scarcity of water makes scarcity of prey. It is asserted by close observers that on the desert he will often go for week without either food or water, and yet show the lack of neither in his appear ance.
 On the western slopes of the Sierra Nevada mountains and in fact every where in California where the cougar makes his lair in striking distance of settled country. he feeds principal ly upon stock killed and carried from the foothill ranches. Young pigs are his favorite piece de resistance, and it is due to his weakness for them that he Is most often detected and shot. Owing to the fieshiness of a pigs neck. its wind is not so easily shut off in the grip of the powerful jaws as is that of many larger ami mals. and squalls and, commotion in the pig pen will bring out mountain rancher with his shotgun more quick ly than any other alarm.
 Lambs and calves also suffer heav- fly from cougars, and even the old animals are not exempt from his at. tack Where the animal killed is too heavy to carry off. the lion drinks his fill of blood. usually sucking from the jugulars in the throat. If there is not enough blood to satisfy him, he will lunch further upon the carcass itself, picking about and eating only the choice portions. Once leaving car cass he rarely returns to it except in seasons of scant food conditions. and many lion-killed COW and deer is left for the coyote to banquet on. In fact. if anything at all is caught in a trap set upon the carcass of an animal killed by cougar nine times out of ten it will be coyote
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
4 POINT TO LOOK TO.

When man swears himself into matrimony, he is allowed to submit any sort of testimony. and none of 1t is seriously impugned.
 But when he swears himself out, he is narrowly limited to the beggarly facts. and moreover must endure the merciless hammering of crafty law yers bent on discrediting him.
 Might it not effect a saving of heart aches to fortify our girls somewhat with a techinicand av danc anh an when they are wooed. they may the quicker detect the incompetent. the irrelevant and the immaterial? Pluck
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
Dream of Grouchy Man.

Landlord w. J. Akers is' authority for this story, told a few days ago by Congressman Adam Bede during a brief sojourn in the city.
 It's about man who got up wrong foot foremost, refusing to re- spond to his wife's cheerful greeting and working himself up into sullen fury for no reason at all.
 Did you sleep well, dear?" she sweetly asked all unaware of his huff
 Sleep, nothing." exclaimed the grouch. q did nothing but dream"
 How nice" she giggled. Il won der if you dreamed of me-"
 Just that" he affirmed. All night, too"
 And what did you dream. dear?" she ruthlessly pursued her inquiry
 Dreamed you ran away with a fellow,' he growled.
 Yes? And
 And l was wondering what in thunder he was running for. r.'-Cleve- land Leader.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
HIS WAS A NOBLE LOVE.

Is the contract of dover properly drawn up, signed and witnessed ," asked the court of Castle-on-the-Bum
 Yes sighed Gladys Golden
 There are no loopholes through which your wise lawyers of Philadel. phia might creep?"
 Not a loophole,' said the fair Gladys.
 And your fathers holdings in Amalgamated Whalebone, American Cheese and Macaroni and Tin Soup plate 6's have not been affected by the recent depression?"
 No. dearest answered Miss Gold. en, firmly.
 Then I love you" said the noble count; and two fond hearts beat as one Judge.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
JOLT FOR COLLEGE SUMMERS
Sociology Students Aroused the Ire O
 Rowery "Boozinc."

The class in sociology at Williams college, which occasionally makes a visit to New York's sums, is at least gaining material upon which each of them should make a reputation as a raconteur. if they don't learn how the other half lives. The other day they visited Magistrate Films court and were seated in long row behind the bench. A pickled lady from the Bow cry gazed at them with outspoken ab- horrence. Dirty little sussiety judges, said she. "Oughter be 'shamed of 'emselves-comin' down here embarrass hard-workin' lady If 1 could get at 'em. I'd learn 'em. I'll get at 'em anyhow"
 The court officer restored her to her place in line. dragging her violently back just as she had half way mounted the rail separating her from the sus- siety judes." The sociologists flushed crimson. She still watched them angrily. The crowded courtroom. with never smile in it's hundreds, stared at the college boys duly Now and then one spectator would point out something unique about the sociolo- gists to his neighbor, and the pair would mnutter together Finn and his victims were forgotten in the interest aroused by the sociologists. The soused person was pushed along in front of the magistrate She turned her back on the court to watch the sociologists. Failing to gain her at tention, Magistrate Finn said: Ten days"
 Sure. Dan, dear" she half whis- pered to MT. Finn, turn me loose wid them Nancies for jusht minnut and make it twinty days
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
v INDIANS TAKE GREAT IN NEST IN COUNTRY SHOWS.
the Distinctively American In. Ition Which Indicates That Savage Tribe Is Becom-
 ing Civilized.

distinctively American institu- he country fair, has been adopt the savage Crow Indians, and iove may be accepted as proof ie that the civilization of that and once warlike. tribe is no pr0blematical. or a consumma- Q be hoped for in the distant but an accomplished fact. the aborigines take kindly to e music and pink lemonade and te for prizes in exhibitions of oth pumpkins, squashes and bers, it is evident that nothing e accident of race differentiates rom the white farmers who re- air day as the great event of ar. There is nothing in com ,etween the warpath and the V; and the warrior who has
 the joy of seeing his rooster rst prize, or of witnessing the tiOn of his yearling heifer with le ribbon, will never again per 5 bronzed features to be adorned warpaint. The Crows are evi-
 ready for citizenship, and if prove as crafty in politics as Ised to be in war the political, of Montana will surely have a, fight to regain their supremacy. fourth annual fair of the Crow Swas held several weeks ago. ly and financially it was an un- cal success. From the viewpoint lovers of the spectacular the Indian fair beats the greatest est show ever put on the road; deeper interest and signifi- lie in the fact that it shows le aborigines have deliberately reyer given up the old ways, tat their ambitions. hopes and ions now lie along lines of ll rivalry with their white fel- izens.
 fair at tie Crow agency in east ,ntana was largely attended by feet. Cheyennes. Sioux, Neg
 and members of many other of the northwest. It was, prob he, most representative gather tribes of the northwest ever as- d Together. Considerably more 1000 Indians were in attend Each tribe was assigned to lar place, and there all mem
 that tribe erected their tepees,
 night ceremonial dances were in large tents erected for that e. The camp was approached road that led across foot
 crossing the Little Big Horn
 At the footbridge 25 cents ad-
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
A FACTOR IN WILD WEST ERIN FRONTIER LIFE.
imal in America That Is Under Great a Variety of Names as Is This
 Animal.

American mountain lion is
 by more names than any other east of this or any other con
 In the northwest he is lion and sneak cat; in the md southeast, panther and r;;n infthe southwest and Mex xican lion; and in Central and America. puma. tiger and a Va Spanish names.
 Assortment of names for the
 is possibly due, as in the case luman brother, to his notorious
 character; for it is a fact that ice dockets show that the crim- lth the worst record is almost bly the one with the greatest . of aliases. Certain it is that racter is bad; not the big, bluff. adness of the grizzly, nor yet ming, half-playful badness of but a mean, sneaking, coward
 often vindictiye badness that tly his own. r
 st impossible to hunt by and take unawares, he is him. , most stealthy of hunters, and ? akes his prey but by surprise. 2 Admirably fitted to pursue and l, pursuit. So soft of foot is he l. tuns over the dried. leaves of
 tohwood and sycamore without a sound. He has none of
 Illness of other quadrupeds in
 y, but moves with a stealthy, I. step that carries him on with rift, smooth, undulating move ,Ht a snake. Of a uniform color mp to tip, save for slight shad- al back and belly, he presents lit distinguish him from the fawn f own of the rocks and dead D. and leaves over which he pre-
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
SHE KNOWS ENOUGH.

She does not know who Caesar was. Nor when Columbus sailed the seas. She may. for all she says or does, Think BotticelE is a cheese! Now. gentle reader. don't commence To say you think it is a pity To live in ignorance so dense--
 You see. she's pretty. She will not wrinkle up her brow To call to mind a verse of Keats; Ask her if Shakespcare's writing now. She'll say she likes the parquet seats; Of current topics she may speak And show transformation simple But in the rose-Eink of her cheek There is dimple. She'll tell you socialism's cute
 Because friend who's rather plain Is featuring from here to Butte And has so many in in her train: She cannot tell you what is meant By the philosophy of Ibsen. But hers is beauty that is blent- ltjsher-G Gibson. Of differential calculus
 She may discourse in language clear Until it comes to us
 She means some automobile gear; The fact that Raphael is dead Leads not to talk on pictures olden- Ii'i IDS are cHefrN-flpeiS-
 Her hair is golden So, what is history to her? What are reformers and their ilk? She has the latest word on fur And wears the newest shades in silk. Sigh not that she must live alone, For her unlearnedness quench your
 pity;
 She knows all that needs to be known You see she's pretty!
 Wilbur D. Nesbit, in Life.
The Green Forest tribune., 1909-02-19
THE NAVAL BUREAU

his pleasure, but not for more than four years.
 Many of the faults found by the late Mir. Whitney have been correct ed Secretary Newberry said. Aside from the general board that has no status fixed by law. and the board on construction similarly organized. the distribution of authority is as follows: The duties of both of those bodies have been fixed in the regulations which have been approved this day by the president in accordance with section 1547. and they have the status of law