davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

If you work all day with transit,
If you peep for dotted sight,
If YOU do your work like proper man,
You should certainly play at night.
And that accounts for the city Of De
Russy. What is a city! 1t is place
where people can find everything they
want. Therefore Fort De Russy is
city because it is run on plan which
gives all the members of the engineer
corps a something that will appeal to
them. no matter what their forte or
trend may be.
If an engineer likes billiards or pool,
he gets it; if he has penehant for
handball, he gets il; if he Is something
of Thespian, he has chance to get
on the stage and show what he can do;
If he merely likes to watch other fell
lows work, he can see them do 1t; II
he has the boxing bug in his bonnet,
he can have a chance with the best OF
them; if he thinks he can write, he has
a chance in the newspaper; II he can
draw, then he has large field to cover.
There is not single decent human
amusement or sport that is not repre-
scented at this big city of De Russy and
that is why you see so few engineers
downtown.
Sergeant Spencer invited me to go out
and take peek at the inner conscious
ness of what army life can be made
into by people who want to do it. He
said that / and my friends should have
all we wanted to eat and smoke and
that he would make it his personal onus
TO look after us.
So we went out there, and from three
o clock in the afternoon until half past
ten at night, the British visitor and
myself enjoyed the unique experience
of seeing how an engineering camp is
run like small city.
Fort De Russy is conglomeration
of railroad iron, cement foundations,
huge gun protectors and other things
that have to do with coast defense.
But, EVA of all the Notifications and
separated from all the gun pilikia and
the officers quarters, is the main camp.
This camp is a multum in parvo.
There are less than hundred men in
the engineer detachment here, and many
of them are out in the country doing
surveying all the time. But those who
are left behind are encouraged to stay
at home and have their amusements
right in the camp.
Personally Conducted.
The best way to see the place is to
take a personally conducted tour with
Sergeant Spencer round the camp. The
sergeants quarters are situated right
in the middle of the camp. In front
is the double row of tents and another
row of eocoanut trees. Behind is the
post corral and beyond the ocean.
From the sergeants office Spencer
took us to the handball courts. Here
there was a double court with good
flooring and, suspended above, were two
big arc lights on either side. The men
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

If YOU work all day with transit,
If You peep for dotted sight,
If you do your work like proper man
You should certainly play at night.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

hairs devastated this great institution
with their bowls
Every man in the company belongs to
the club and gets full use and benefit
of what it can give them. The club
house itself was fixed up from an old
building at the enormous cost of four
dollars.
This, of course, did not include labor,
all of which was willingly donated by
prospective members of the club. The
pictures give very good idea of the
place. 1t is mostly lanai with two re-
cesses, one for the billiard table and one
for the piano. The major portion of
the lanai is shattered in to keep off the
afternoon sun.
There is a well selected library of
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

their bathroom and the bathhouse their
dressing room, used regularly twice a
day.
AS the engineers are employed in
making a map of the entire Island,
there are several detachments out in
the field. Sometimes they return at
night, if their work is not too far way,
but mostly they carry their own impedi-
menta with them and camp out In
case of any of them returning unex-
pectedly, there are extra tents in the
row, all ready for such an emergency.
And Then Supper.
BY the time we had seen all this
and taken a few pictures, the sun was
slanting down to the horizon and the
men were quitting work. There was a
scurrying to the bathhouse much
splashing and laughing and then the
.bugle blew for supper.
An evidently welcome sound, for they
came running in from all parts and soon
the long tables in the "dining room
were lined with brown faces and busy
jaws.
Here. perhaps. is the most important
part of all in making the men contented
with their home life. To feed them
well, to have them get up from the
table with a sigh of satisfaction after
meal, such as would not be outdone
in their own home, is the cook s ambi-
/ fion.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

remarkably clever pictures.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

about a thousand volumes and the club
subseribes to forty-two magazines and
fifteen daily newspapers, so that the
class of reading obtainable by the mem
bers covers everything from aeronauties
to society novels.
A Clever Pianist.
Several of the club members are good
pianists but the recognized boss in this
branch of art is Hovey. When it comes
to ragtime and popular airs, the music
just sprays off from the ends of his
fingers. He just naturally has to keep
them going and your feet have to keep
going in time
He is also an expert accompanist, a
rare gift, and can adapt himself and his
music to any kind of song, comic, senti-
mental or classical
A Trio of Stars.
While mentioning the city musician
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

titles enables them to get, they manage
to conduct the eommissariat practically
without loss.
The Red Sheet.
One delightful feature of the camp
life is their newspaper. Not having
the typewriter and bound into single
copy, which is eagerly read and passed
round
The name of it is "The Red Sheet y
and it states that it is devoted to sports
of all kinds. F. Babel is editor and
J. G. Thorne. chief reporter, while ear
toonist Strickland fills many pages with
remarkably clever pictures
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

The different sporting events in the
camp are written up in proper style
and cartooned and then there are all
kinds of personal notes and joshes, all
properly appreciated by the victims.
The advertising section is very fun
ny. Some of the local much-advertised
products are taken off to perfection and
the latest styles in exaggerated MILL
merry are shown for the delight Of all
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

can play as soon as their work is pau
for the day and from then until taps.
There were two men playing very
vigorously at the time. One was top
noteher at the game and the other
comparative tyro. But the latter was
learning rapidly and both men were
quite out of breath at the time we
happened along and watched them.
From the handball courts we walked
past the kitchen and general kaukau
quarters. These are common to all army
posts and so have no special signifi-
eance, except that the stores and gen.
etal excellence of the grub >have some
thing to do with the keeping of the
men at home.
The Company Club.
From the kaukau place we went over
TO the company club. Here is a place
that comes as nearly as possible to the
original ideal canteen, before the long
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

While mentioning the city musician
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

it would be well to also name the head
entertainer and comedian He is cook
of the hospital department and his name
is Bryant. He is round and smiling and
jolly. There turks a twinkle in his eye,
when he is saying the most solemn
things, that makes you want to laugh.
When he gets up to do stunts the audi
ence is all ready to let go the laughter
and the most jaded theater-goer in the
world, would loosen up and enjoy him
self when Bryant starts some of his
funny dialect stories, told in his own
inimitable half solemn way.
The third of a trio of stars in the
entertaining line is Ford, who sings
nicely and has line of clog, buck and
wing, and other styles of dancing that
! is as spontaneous and musical as it is
| rhythmic to listen to.
From the clubhouse we walked along
to The bathhouse This is roomv shed
built out over the water, partly on
piles and has benches along the shore
ward side and row of shower baths
along the water side. Nothing par
ticularly elegant about it, but roomy,
convenient and all that is needed for
the purpose.
Most Picturesque Part.
From the bathhouse back along the
board walk-known as "Atlantic City :"
to the most picturesque part of the
entire town. Here, at the dividing line
between the city and the fort, are the
hospital buildings and the married
of well-watered grass.
themselves, each surrounded by a plot
married and have little houses all to
men S quarters. Four of the men are
The hospital is a cottage fixed up
very cleverly into temporary Red
Cross depot. There are a dozen neat
white cots with their mosquito bars
and porch on both the land and sea-
| ward sides, so that convalescent pa
tients have a shady place to sit in, no
matter what the time of day.
Then there is a dispensary and supply
| room and a dining-room with kitchen
at one end. Everything is spotlessIy
clean everywhere and the place has an
air of quiet homeIiness that is very
pleasing.
The view from the front of the hos
pital is delightful. A green-really
green-lawn slopes down to the water
and the foliage of the trees droops down
so that the broad expanse of the Pa
cifc in front is seen only in smiling
patches of sunlit water between the
| branches.
Wide Bathroom
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14
A Wide Bathroom.

The tents for the men are set up in
a double row. Each one accommodates
four men comfortably. They all have
mosquito bars and electric lights and
the men have plenty of room for their
household Gods. The wide ocean is
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14
Two Clever Chefs.

Sergeant Wills, aided by two remark
ably clever chefs, Jaeger and Backer,
effects this. The food is of the very
best in the first place, but it is also
well cooked and above all, the coffee
is thoroughly delicious. Then again
many little details are looked after that
make all the difference in the serving
of a meal. When the bugle blows ev-
erything is ready and so the plates can
be put on the table hot. Every hot
dish is served hot and not lukewarm,
and the cold canned meats, fruit and
other accessories are set out in row
down the center of the table.
For supper that night we had big
ressoles, deliciously Favored; fried pota
toes, crisp and hot; green peas, cold
pressed veal, canned apricots, Dundee
marmalade and the most delicious bread,
warm from the post bakery. The cot
fee was masterpiece. 1t is made in
a large boiler and is served in jugs,
milk and sugar already added. Sergeant
Wills makes this his own particular spe-
cialty and the result more than war
rants the care he gives to it.
After supper Sergeant Wills took us
| through his department and showed us
the stores with only the best brands
| on all the canned goods and sauces, of
which they keep quite variety. The
| allowance is twenty-five cents day
| per man and, with this amount and the
wholesale rates which buying in guam
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

"This kind hearted-looking gentle
man would like to meet some of the
featherweights in two-round go. Ad-
dress, the Iron Works. -
Cartoon from the cred Sheet
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-11-14

One view of the clubhouse
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02
By Allen Jones 5

ENGLISHNEN particularly y AlIe
Il those inhabItIng the British
Isles display a tendency to
haggle first over the exact shade Ot difference
between VIII and humOr, and. second, over
the quality and quantity OF Wit or huiit'I
possessed by their ncIghborS the Ncpts anu tile
irish \ discussion OF the second nyarl'oIl
eliminates IN a wranCIc over the first The con
tention that the scots are deficient IN huuor Is
met with the statement that. while they may
lack humor they are abundantly supplied WIN
wit. which brings out the counter charge that
the Irish and not the Scots hold the IaureIS Tor
wit and the counter to the counter charge Is
that 1t Is the Irish who possess hurnOr ana tht
Scot, who are witty Naturally the discussion
shifts to the difference between the two words
To reach an agreement concerning the mean
ing Of the two words. Wit and hu1nOr appears
to present no great difficulties. and 70 dpP'I
ton the terms It seems 70 be necessary only 20
compare legitimate specimens OF CharacterlStic
anecdotes Of the two peoples James { feT-
naIl probably agrees with all other autnOriue9
in defining wit as the quick perception OF uri-
usual or commonly unperCeIved anaIogieS or re
'atIons between things apparently unrelated
and has been said 10 depend upon a unl'n p'
surprise and pleasure. The analOgles with "iicH
wit PLAYS are often superficial or arunC1al. hJ-
NOR deals with real aualogIeS OF amusing or en-
tertIIning kind Witt, keen sudden. brlet. anu
sometimes severe. humOr IS deep thoughtiul.
and sustained With the meaning OF the
terms thus definitely fixed. a comparison ot !e-
gituate characteristic anecdotes Shouli He-
tcrruiue the class 70 which the peasantr1e' Ji
the Scots or the Irish belong
To secure Legitimate characteristics anec-
dotcs. " II Is necessary to 60 back to period be
fore the advent of cheap literature; for what
now masquerades as Scot wit or Irish hum'r
NAV first have seen the light Of day IN the otHce
of The Flegcnde Blactter. lie Rire, or
some of the humorous publications or SPAN.
Italv OF even the United States. The old scot
ministry furnished an almost unendlng supply
of legitimate anecdotes. and one. selected AZ
random for comparison with another 't ir1Sh
origin admirably illustrates the difference 'r-
tween scot wit and Irish humor
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02
Soles and Bald Heads

DURING the discussion " the leather tax at
II the time of the war with France. the Cham
ceIlor Of the EXchequer declared that IN the
prosecution Of the present war every man ought
20 give his last guinea To protect the remainder
Nandceur replied that " however that may be.
the tax ON leather would be severely felt by the
barefootei peaSautrv IT Ireland ~ while Sir
Bovle Roche suggested that tins could be
reued,ed 10y making the under feathers OF
wood
There is also the story of the IrIShman who
was travelling with a bald headed man They
both put up az the same mn. and the lrIShmau
instructed the waiter % call hum az sunrise 1t
So happened that the IriShmau had had his hdIr
clipped close % his head before starting on the
Journey. "A circumstance that he had entirely
forgotten When he was called from a deep
Sumber bv the waiter he put his hand 20 his
head. IN a manner characteristic of the people.
and. feeling il practically bald. shouted % the
waiter, Look here. You spalpeen' What do
YOU mean by this You have walked the bald
man instead OF me.
There are no Scot bulls. but the Scots have
been guilty Of some bad breaks that bear
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02
Fixing His Occupation


THIS characteristic of Irish humor Is further
illustrated IN a rcbuke once administered bv
an IrIshman-to the famous Mitchner proprietor
OF an equally famous hotel IN NJrgate The
smaIucsS of MitChncr'S VINE bottles bore no pro-
portion whatever % the high price OF the VINE a
fact that disglSted an Irishman who frequcnted
the place
Look here Mitchucr," said the Irishman.
who had Just paid the high price for a short
bottle and my friend have Just had a bet
as to what profession YOU were bred to prlgl-
nalIy. and we must appeal 10 your good nature
to decide the matter for us.
After some hesitation. Nitchncr replied IN his
usual affected manner. ! was bred To the law
In that case, said the lrishmdn, " have
lost my bet. for had Land odds that YOU were
bred a packer
~ packer, sir exclaimed Mitchner, m we'll
fciguei horror. What could induce YOU To
think sir | was bred packer
Why. sir. ~ was the reply " Judged So from
your vine measures. for | thought no one but
a very szilful packer who had acquired the
knack IN his youth, could ever get quart NJ
WINE into "a pint bottle
The thoughtful preparation for the point IS
clearly shown in this Int of Irish humor- The
trap was set deliberately. 1t was well balted. and
the victim was almost dragged To- it. 1t has
the thoughtfulueSs of humor. but lacks the
SpOntaneIty of wit
With this may be compared another anec-
dote also selected from the abundant supply
contributed by the old Scot ministry. The
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02
The Irish Bull

THE Irish bull for which the son Of ErIn has
ever been renowned. belongs % An entirely
different class. WnIlc It possesses the Spou-
raneItv and the brevitv OF W.T. 1t Is lacking IN
wisdom. IN important characteristic, and It
certainly lacks the thoughttulueSS OF humor
Irish bulls. ike IRISH humpr. have been grossly
c1uuterfeItci and poor Paddy has been made
% shoulder breaks that even an IrIShuan would
not dare 70 make. y number of legitimate IrISh
bulls are still % be found however. and one or
two VIII be sufficient % show the quality OF the
pure Irish article
An IRISH doctor. who had Just returned from
the West Indies. SAID IN describing the climate.
'' 1t IS most Internal Had I lived there until
to-day should have been dead OF yellow fever
two wears ago.
Another doctor. without Observing the bull.
agreed with the speaker and declared that the
climate must be very unwhOleSorne. because
vast number of people died there
Very true. remarked another physician.
but If YOU VIII tell me of any country where
people 10 not die. | shall 60 and end nv DAYS
there tomorrow.
Thus IN a very ordinary conversation two
outrageous bulls are recorded. but all that
were perpetrlteI IN the Irish House of Com
mons when ireland still had her Parliament.
would Till a volume
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02


land and DR. Macknlght, celebrated 7ch'LaT
and Commentator
DR. Macknight was caught IN "a heavy down
r,e1rr Of ram while on his way % his church one
sunday morning and when he arrived at Jhe
,-.s+r,- he. was very wet. Every means was
used u drv him out IN time Tor the service Out
as the hour drew near Dr. MacknIght became
nervous. fearing that he would not be III NJ con
dItion 10 appear before his tocE-
oh. I wush | was dry ne walled 10
YOU think I'm dry eneuch moo
Pattlng him on the shoulder Dr. Henry re-
piled m his most soothing manner Bile wee
doctor and We 81 be dry rueuch "Leh Ee St-
Here a-e IN the lIa-siricatI1ns OF wit except
that It Is only mildly severe Here Is keennt-s".
sr,antaneitv and b-evIty- There Is no thought
ftlI preparation. no leading up % the point, Jnr
victim himself MADE the opening oa1ted MS
own trap and then walked INTO II
Who Was Head of the House
ONE more COMPARISON should establish the
- ~c,tsuar's claim 20 VIII and rx upon irl~'
Dlea~antrles the label OF humOr-
Scot minister 1f the Gospel while making
his usual rounds among the members 'I MS
flock. same u the door Jf house where Ms
gentle tapping could not be heard tor the noise
III q contention within
After waiting a little, he rpenec the door ana
walked IN. saving with an authoritatlFe voice.
should Ike % Euow who IS the heai 5t TINS
house
WeeI sir saii the husband # We. SIT
loon q wee ue'u maybe be able u tell We; tor
we are rust irving % settle that point
TIN, Ike the anecdotes already repeated. and
ike all legitimate Scottish anecdotes possesses
All the characteristics Of Wit. while the follow
ing Irish anecli1te ike practically all legitimate
IRISH anecdotes possesses none OF the character
rsri-S NJ VII but all 'f rh- qualities OF huIu'r-
Long OUT Of the Sea
M GAINoR. an IriShHan ceiebraJe1 e.. ..I t2r
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02
SCOT WIT AND IRISH HUMOR

principal characters OF tins
anecd6te are DR. Henry. the
author of Y History of Eng
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02

nATENTS No ATTORNEYS fee until patent is Al
~ tEH lowed. Write for hTUe1tor's Gtide
FRANKLIN H. HOUGH, Loan Trust Bldg Washington, Dc
New-York tribune., 1909-05-02

ENGLISHMEN, particularly
l. those inhabiting the British
Danskeren. [volume] (Neenah, Wis.) 1892-1920, 1909-12-31

buert goot Snotrnf, oct mootaeer.
Get par Ell itor Slot 9ern, DER
par iamlet.
Gen gnmle Sport, aanefsrieL
bar IN BELT afIsit ben npere = au-
tomobiltsrsleH til 9pffel
5 Ben fommenoe llge = ira
3. til s. Salriiar ifal Der iaa pare
lIoitiIIing al 5nrm- % SnueproOut-
ter Ter er nolooet Gremier til eft
8eIeb al benpeo 500 =
fife idn li0t FOR Ell gp iom Blair.
- Roar De trnnger til 1moI9ee-
ioa beies Or. Mnoerien, fom
Dor oper Blair NotionaI ganf.
Himelige priier.
Danskeren. [volume] (Neenah, Wis.) 1892-1920, 1909-12-31
6rOar 5aas, ia.
(~5ortiatteIie ira SIDE A.

Marius Glauien og Hoin Gonraoi
ieireoe oeres grpaup SafiigeIies-
ooaen 5. 25. aopbr. @iertelie 2pf-
enifningl
geter Gbriitenien fra Rinoen,
fom tioIiaere bar farmet Der
pe0 gpen Far 4neo 3amilie oaret
o. beisgt gfeat os 9enner Der. De
rejite iomtneu meo noale andre ga
milier fra Minoen Nebr. til So.
9nan1ar, Wontana, bpor De
agter at bointte lig.
On ing oanif aDinoe 0enoes
giaenaon bar emma 2arief) Rrs.
aeaog, menem II % IS sfnr GAM
mel, lido Jig en- Single gennem so.
Danskeren. [volume] (Neenah, Wis.) 1892-1920, 1909-12-31

oeoet Sun osoe 0ngen efter. aar.
ia9en til benoes fortuipleoe Sofio,
ling fenoes life.
Wntbias Smitb bar fsbt 2orefita
9ergs Sus paa @rope ct.
Ssren anoerien og Suitru gIpoer
Zig / oenne 5io. forOi De bar 9eieg
al oeres Seit og Soi8erontter ira
Spencer, Sa., og oeres Tatter %
Suieerisn ira Gwatonna, 0iitn. !
Ra8aretb Meui9beO bapoe SliIeha
for gernene / 5orsoags aites, %
for De unae ] Meniebeoen bar 0er
SuIetre 0nsSag 8. %. Der.
Sennp Glen, 0atter Of Cars 81
len os Suitrii, @ropp Ct, osoe Sirss
hagen 3. 81. Gee. Sun b1poe for
noget ODER ct Var oRret lioenoe al
aouiumption. S Den ferite geriooe'
af benoes Spgoom par benoes Eli
Itnnb u~efsle1oes ioet bun mart feIte.
fig beore for oerefter i9en at blioe|
mere iDg. Sum opbolot zig iioite|
CONNER en- Del paa Snnatoriet oeOI
Soma Gitn, u0en at Der bog bite
fig nogen gebrite / benoes 1ilitanO.l
s Den iioite Sio pun leueoe, par bum
meeet lioenoe, ga ieIp ON benOesl
fore 10 ngoigt uiI6e ifiaes fra benz
De, par oct 10 en- gefrielie baaOe.
for benoe og fof Dem, Oa 9soen.
fom % befrieoe 6en0e fra afle ben.
oes 9iOelier og g~rGngsler; oe iaa,.
oa G6oen fom nprmere % nprmere,
og Bun oi0ite, at oct Inffe0e moo.
enoen, oa fuitoe bun iige uoen at
tOiOle: Seq Oeo, ot iee gaar biem'
til SimmeIen".
Sennp Olien bleb omtrent en- og.
en- balp Manneo oDer ire og tpoe
aar gnmmel. Senoes gegraDelie
foreeif ira Ra8aretb airfe | Ssn-
bags, buor en- flor 5oriamlins Del
toa | ssroegirostieneIten.
Bait. rs .NDrop talte uofro 2u-
cas- s, 50 og SO, bpor oct beooer /:
SUN er life oso, men iober, - og|
be beIo bnm".
Bi BIZ tage auIeonine til at be.
Dione De isrgenoe GfterIaote Dor.
DeItageIie / oeres sore.
Sens Jalfien 90 Jamilie er rejit
op til hilbert Geo, Mimi, bbor De
bar reutet en- Jnrm ! Nerbeoen af
gpen. 3. 6alffen og Suitru bar
elers at be Wenneifer, iom Nn5aretb
Wenigbeo life goot fan taale at
mite ret mango at; inrIig bar Mrs.
5. 5alfien en- opgtig og niofrr Coz
rerinoe ! SsnoagsifoIen, fsr bun
bleO gift. 0ieeleoes bar bun JON
ung pige for ~ a IA 9lar iioen, oa
Danskeren. [volume] (Neenah, Wis.) 1892-1920, 1909-12-31

@ros aonO i9rIig arbeioeoe paa
mango Sierter Der, meeet oirfiom
for at bragg andre unee Bigger meo
til Msoerne. gi pil oerfor M, ga
De refer fra os, iige benz Snf og
snife Dem Subs geliigneIie / oeres
ripe Stem.
st glpoeliat 90 peliignet 0ptaar
snifes sGaniferen"s Heonftsr Nog
29iere fra
Soh