The Washington herald., 1909-02-20

Cincinnati. Feb. S.-WiIIiam H Taft
became q Knocker at sight here in
Cincinnati tonight. but in doing so he
had more fun than small boy would
have in watching a cage Of monkeys.
The Knockers. be il known. are an
organization Of Cincinnatis most promi-
nent business men. ruled over b. an
anonymous individual who modestly signs
himself The Invisible Knox" The or
Ge7s that the invisible one issued al the
dinner tonight and the stunts that he
pulled on made the President-elect laugh
50 hard he could scarcely eat.
At the same time. Mr.. Taft appreciated
that the Knockers. friends Of his boy
hood days. were in their own peculiar
way saying good-by TO him as a private
citizen for at least four years. aIr. Taft
thought he ought to acknowledge this
sentiment with a little speech.
He got up and started 10 talk. but
another Mr.. Big Bill Taft. who sat at
a table opposite with Uncle sam and
Miss Columbia. arose IN all the majesty
Of his 800 pounds and inquired with some
heat just where the real Mr. Taft got on.
The bogus Mr. Taft would have it
known that II there was TO be any speech
making he was the person who would DO
It He would brook no attempt by any
"interloper" The real President-elect sat
down, properly squelched. and for the
rest Of the evening he listened 10 himself.
or, rather, his likeness. telling the diners
what fine tine the President-elect was
having.
Have Handwriting Bee.
The dinner was held IN the Business
Mems Club. The Knockers. 100 strong.
all gathered there az S e,1I.k and lad q
hand-shalzing bee with the Mt Taft.
Half an hour later waiter stepped into
the reception room and announced, Din
ner IS served
Nine veteran knockers. one Of them
made up 10 represent a typical American
business man. led the way to the dining
tered the dining room he was confronted
by Mister Taft. his likeness. dressed
in evening clothes which matched the
real Taft's down even 10 the white waist
coat and pearl cum buttons.
One glance at the ''inDostOr-' and the
PresideHt-eiect let out laugh that. must
have startled the cab horses in the street
Mister Taft" followed with one almost
as hearty. and then turning 10 Uncle Sam
and Miss Columbia. he led the vav into
the dining room behina Smitties' brass
band The nine selected knockers. with
the real Taft and the other members Of
the club many Of them made I'd 10 repre-
sent different countries, followed.
Occupies Place Of Honor.
In the procession as il filed jpfo the
banquet hall were representatives Of many
nations The real. Taft. with his escort
Of nine Knockers. had the table Of honor
in the center Of the han. Next "a II
was the table occupied by the bogus Taft
Representatives Of tie various countries
presided over the tables.
The diners seated, Uncle Sam arose
and gravely announced thar Now. az
always. the Knockers would begin with a
song. WhereUpOn Mr. Taft listened "a
MS other self and the entire band sing
this to the air OF Marching Through
Georgia
We arc hand q knockers here. who l,,o-t v1.s ~
theiT might,
t. slrsishfen out the things We know az m. -
SetIy right. -
We Esock the bad and boost the god tin It * on.
While We are knocking for slo-7.
down big safety valves. There was J
hiss OF escaping steam and the fun va.
on A hand OF troubadotrs entered
After marching around the room the,
brought Up ST the table where the rea
Taft was seated. There they relieve,
themselves Of song Of welcome. whiel
was vigorously spplauded by the "Miste1
TAFT al the other table
Pants Had Feet.
The troubadOCrs gone. entered 2. grea
big pair Of black pants. with suspender,
dangling The pants had no eyes. bu
they did have feet, and they walked
right down 10 the table where Incl,
sam sat 4 Russian officer stepped on
from behind the pants. and. bowing t,
Uncle sam, sang:
Lnese f2nts. 1ou see. from creasss free
FTCu seat 20 kree yCu must agree
ATe strong IN seam and vide Of ban.
And large both fore and aft
An envoy from the German Emperor
entered, with a commission to kiss Mr.
Taft on each cheek. just as Wilhelm
greeted King Edward recently. The en-
voy not only save the bogus Taft two
hearty smacbs, bat he included Miss Co
lumbia in his commission.
Great Britain appeared at the table
where the fake Taft was seated, leading
3 real Irish cook. Johnny Bull wanted
70 have her do the White House cooking
but the Irish cook had something 70 say
upon the proposition for herself She
consented to take the place only after she
had told Mr. Taft" IN black and
white what he could and what he could
not DO around the house.
Homer to the Flag.
A number Of other humorous stunts
were pulled of.
At the conclusion Of the dinner the
American citizen who was seated at the
Taft table arose. and. taking an Ameri-