The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1909-04-18
The Emperor First Lesson.


When Emperor William was a small
boy he had strong objection to being
washed in the morning, and his gov
'erness, having had some unpleasant ex-
periences with him and being in some
doubt as to what she had better do, ap-
pealed to his father, the then Crown
Prince Frederic Frederic answered:
"The next time he gives you any
trouble on this score leave him alone
to his own pleasure and report to me"
Naturally, it was not long before the
young Prince refused to go through
the publication process, and the gov
erness followed the orders received.
Now. the boy had little carriage
and was very fond of driving out in
the morning, and he generally ordered
the eoaehman to go by way of the
Brandenburg gate, as it amused and
BATTERED him to see the soldiers in the
barracks just inside the gate turn out
and present arms as the heir to the
Empire passed the quarters. Accord
lngly, on the morning of his disobedl-
ence, the order was as usual, To the
Brandenburg gate,'' and the carriage
rolled rapidly thither. But what was
the amazement and the rage of the
Princeling. on arriving there, to see no
soldiers except those on guard, and they
took not the slightest notice of him.
In towering passion he ordered the
coachman to return to the palace,
where, rushing into his father $ room,
he complained of the indecent beha-
vior Of the guard, and demanded their
condign punishment. ~
But his father only smiled and said,
in the gentlest voice: eur unge-
wasehener Prinz wird niemals praesen-
tirt /" An unwashed Prince is never
saluted y .-Harper Weekly.
When the Thatch Gets Thin.
cdr. G. J. Hexamer, president of the
National German American Alliance
said Philadelphia millionaire, "be
lieves that it is their sensitiveness-
their sensitiveness about their accent
and so on-whieh binders many a
young German immigrants success.
SIN a splendid address to young inn
migrants / once heard him say that if
they were sensitive they would eontin-
ually be finding jeers and insults to
NOPE over-as many jeers and insults
as fell to the lot of the baldheaded.
IlS NdIu tHftt UNI lhdt va AZ q
downtown barber shop, baldheaded
man came in and took chair next to
the one he occupied
q Hair cut, joe, he said.
''The barber looked at him. slapped
the nude white dome of his skull with
mock tenderness, and gave loud
laugh.
!" Why. man, said he, syou don't
H..
q shine! ''-Washington Star.
How Patti Was Won Over.
Patti was to sing on certain date
at Bucharest, but at the last moment
she declined to leave Vienna. 1t was
Too cold; snow everywhere; she would
not risk catching her death Of cold. NJ.
the impresario, was in de-
,pair. until a brilliant inspiration came
10 him. Quickly he telegraphed to the
advance agent in the Roumanian capt. !
al: cat whatever cost, Patti must
receive an ovation at Bucharest sta
ion from the italian aristocraey. Send r
ne by return the following wire: sThe
members of the Italian and Roumanian /
nobility are preparing to give Nine. :
Patti a magnificent reception. The {
ministry will be represented. Process
ions, torches and bands. Telegraph
he hour of arrival. The advance
gent carried out this instruction and
Fhen the telegram dictated to him over G
he wires arrived in Vienna 1t was
anded to Patti with the desired effect.
How eharmingt" she murmured; t
what time do we start2 ''-Exehange. c
The Groom was Scared !,
The minister advertised for young b
ian to make himself useful IN house A
I'D garden, and that evening Young II
an duly presented himself. "Weil. "
lid the minister, stean You clean
oots?n II think I could" said the n
,ung man, looking rather surprised. il
Can you clean windowsa'' "Iu II