davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

w ASH1NGTON.-Sir John Courts.
" Bart, K. c. NJ. G., K. o. c., c. B.,
who, as plain James c. Courts serves
the United States government in the
responsible position of clerk of the
House committee on appropriations,
has his troubles just like other folks.
People are all the time Fostering him
to death to know if it was his grand
father or his great-grandfather or his
great-great-grandfath who used to
own about 10000 acres in Maryland
and who presided over the feudal glo-
ries of Clean Drinking Manor. And
every time he gets through with one
of these historic bugs and settles
down to work a delegation of home
folks from Tennessee drops in on him
and demands to know why he accept
ed from the Emperor of Korea-be-
fore that eminent parsonage was sat
upon by the Japanese-the military
order of the Setting Moon, third class
and wears the undress button that
goes with it all the time.
But even these annoying things pale
into insignificance beside an incident
that happened just the other day. Mr..
Courts has his nose in chaotic appro-
priation bill and was debating to four
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
nR. WILLIAM G. WOODWARD
- health officer of the District o1

nR. WILLIAM c. WOODWARD,
II health officer of the District of
Columbia, is in favor of abolishing the
only form of athletics indulged in by
members and graduates of the Chau-
tauqua literature and reading circle.
He says that the Chautauqua salute Is
n menace to health.
The salute, as all Chautauquans
know, is a waving of the handkerchief
when friends make hit on the lec-
ture platform o. sail away for distant
lands Everybody waves and every
body is happy provided that one does
not overtax his or her energy.
'"The custom of waving handker.
chief vigorously in the air. says DR..
Woodward, rs dangerous. Nearly ev-
cry contagious disease can be COM
municated in this manner, If the hand
kerchief is slightly soiled. If the lin
en- square has just been purchased, or
has come straight from the laundry,
there is not the slightest danger, but
the waving of handkerchief that has
been used even once Is harmful.
when handkerchief is waved the
wind blows the germs from It. Ty-
phoid fever, scarlet fever, tuberculos.
10, smallpox and chickenpox. measles,
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
In a London Omnibus.

A London bus driver was hailed by
a clerical-looking old gentleman, and
on the first opportunity he remarked
to the conductor: do you know who
you've got inside, Bill? It's Cardinal
Mannin'!" "Go on, that amt Car.
dinal Mannin'." said the conductor, Il
know i'm" They argued further, and
finally bet shilling over it. When
collecting fares the conductor deter
mined to set matters right by direct
inquiry. Excuse me, sir, but are you
Cardinal Mannin'?" The venerable
passenger looked him coldly and bold
ly in the eye, and answered.: What
the devil has that got to do with you?"
The conductor was satisfied, but even
at the sacrifice of bob he had to get
even with the passenger. Putting his
head out of the door he called up to
the driver: "You are right, Bill; it
was is 'oliness."
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

nETROIT. Mich.-Louis Voss is
u somewhat of a cut-up. He is one
of those indulgent fathers who likes
to play jokes on the boys. Beside
him, old man Peck and Foxy Grandpa
are weak performers.
1t started because the little Vosses
were caresless enough to leave lot
of Halloween masks lying around the
house. Charley Voss, one of the most
precocious of the younger Voss con-
tingent, was entertaining Max Dolce
in the barn back of the Voss home at
1861 Monroe avenue.
Charley and Max were punching the
bag. Charley excused himself for a
few minutes and left the future Jim
Jeffries banging away at the inflated
leather. About this time the elder
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

FIFTEEN years ago Francis J. Kill
i kenny arrived in this country from
Ireland. He was so green that he
mistook Fourth Of July celebration
as reception to himself Young Kill
kenny had relatives and friends in
Milwaukee and Chicago and he made
for the middle west soon after his
landing. He had a fund of native wit
and an abundance of energy and
pluck. He got a job cutting grass and
soon came under the notice of Charles
G. Dawes. When Mr.. Dawes came to
Washington as controller of the cur
rency he brought Kilkenny along as
his private secretary. When Dawes
retired from the controllership his
successor found he couldn't get along
without Kilkenny. Mr.. Ridgely was
succeeded as controller by Lawrence
O. Murray and that official has re-
tanned Kilkenny who has now be-
come one of the institutions of the
treasury department.
Young Kilkenny is making remark
able headway with a movement for
the "hOme-going" of Irishmen in 1910,
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Foxy Grandpa" ," in Mask, Causes Scare

Voss happened upon the masks
So he disguised himself as a der
wish, or some other person equally
devlish. Then he made tracks for the
barn. If Max ever had any aspirations
in the direction of prize-ight honors,
he forgot them when his affrighted
eyes confronted the face Internal
Max passed Voss and went down the
barn stairs in just one jump. At the
same instant he yelled for Dave Har-
ris, this being the name of a near
relative who dwells in the vicinity
Dave heard the cry of distress
and he and Mrs. Harris, with all
the little Harrises, piled out into the
night. Dave hit upon Voss, Sr., first.
1t was no time for explanations
and Voss had no chance to offer one.
Dave grappled with him. The two
swayed back and forth in the alley.
Dawes wife caught one glimpse Of
Voss's false face in the moonlight,
concluded that her husband was strug-
Cling with a fiend, and tainted.
The uproar brought all the neigh
bors out and it was some minutes be-
fore affairs could be adjusted.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
OLeary Defends Noted Chicago Cow

Peoples home, Foster and Southport
avenues, is willing to make affidavit
to the statements made him by two
members of his Sunday school class.
Il don't care what anybody else
says about the fire." said O'Leary.
thrusting his thumbs in the ormholes
of his vest. my parents are dead
and can't defend themselves against
this latest fake as to the origin Of
the fire, but I'll speak out, and plain
ly, too.
THAT story about the COW kicking
over the lamp was the monumental
fake of the last century. know what
I'm talking about when l say that the
fire was caused by spontaneous com.
bustion in the hayloft.
"You see. it was like this: The old
man had put in a load of green hay
a few days before the fire. Below the
hay loft were the stables where the
COWS were kept. We had several
cows and did quite a milk business.
"The popular belief has always been
that my mother was milking COW
when the beast kicked over a lamp.
Nothing is farther from the truth
than that musty old fake.
"The family always retired early.
If wasn't in before eight o'clock the
old lady made me remember it with
strap.
1T was Sunday night that the big
fire started, On that night we had
all gone to bed half an hour before
the fire broke out. hadn't gone to
sleep yet and was the first one of the
family to hear the firemen shouting
in front of the house.
Both my father and mother went
to their graves sad at heart over the
world wide notoriety given them in
the printed accounts of the burning OF
Chicago. l wish to make it as en-
phatic as possible that the O'Leary
cow did not kick over a lamp"
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
n EN-. Luke E. Wright, told at din.
VI ner in Washington a war story

r EN-. Luke E. Wright, told at din.
VI ner in Washington a war story
from Manila.
There was once upon time," he
began, "a gallant old general This
general, leading a splendid charge in
his youth, got bullet in his chest and
two sabre cuts across the head. In
after life, relating over the nuts and
wine his many battles, it was this
particular charge that he always de-
cribed most flamboyantly.
'The older the general grew the
more splendid the charge became; the
more awful was the slaughter that
he visited upon the enemy; the more
horrible were the wounds that he re.
ceived. For corroboration he would
always turn to grizzled veteran on
his left, his aide-de-camp. The aide
de-camp would nod his gray head in
acquiescence silently.
Taller and taller grew the gen.
erals stories of the charge. Higher
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24


which
Wtrd stated the
bot De under orders from London and would
warfare British ally unless specifically
~ ~
Herald
how with what we
able circumstances
OF votion matter Of
Ottawa Citizen its
cradle
Canada will dsown that nsanr
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
DEEP.SEATED COUGH
CURED IN FIVE HOURS.
New Homemade Syrup.
(CuC tQ1S OuC.)
From Boston Post

CTOW oOoIOu TVoIs
Progress in medical compounds
never ceases, and uow it is stated by
prominent medical man that any
deep-seated cough or cold on the
lungs can be actually cured in five
hours by the clock. Opium or NOR
phine have been resorted to in the
past, as relief measures. But now it
is learned that the system must be
treated to rid it of Inflammation and
congestion. A tonic laxative cough
syrurp does the work so quickly and
thoroughly as to be almost magical.
What heretofore has taken weeks to
cure can be accomplished in hours.
Get this formula filled or mix it at
home and always keep it on hand:
One-half ounce fluid wild cherry
bark. one ounce compound essence
cardiol and three ounces syrup white
pine compound. Shake the bottle and
take twenty drops every half hour
for four hours. Then take 0ne-half
to one teaspoonful three or four times
a day until the system is purified and
toned up. Give children less according
to age One filling will usually cure
q whole family. as the dose is small.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Salute, Menace to Health

leprosy and diphtheria may be thus
spread"
The Chautauqua saluters criticised
the health officers remarks.
"Dr. Woodward does not know what
he is talking about" said a young wo-
man. I'VE never carry soiled hand
kerchiefs."
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24


with
The judge born Campbell
father at that time physician later becoming Epcopaan
His education the University Chicago
young hurried south and enlisted sergeanmajor Thrhh
1862
10 the 'front.' however,
enlisted Third
again in Ohio while "Morgans
guarded that he did not
After
rapidly front
United
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Dogs Eat at Tables with Banoueters

AS for the hounds, they were treat
ed in the old-time hunt dinner way as
II they not only were human beings,
but the near companions of the club
members and the fair richly-gowned
guests.
Dogs walked up and down among
the members of the festive company,
sat at the table when courses were
served. and ate and drank to their
hearts content. Then, unlike the
human beings present, they lay down
and slept while the company closed
the feast with toasts, songs and other
ancient formalities used on such oc-
casions.
The company did not break up un-
til the wee sma' hours" Of the morn
ing, when they were bundled into
their furs and set out in automobiles
for their various destinations.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

the need of a spe.
cial remedy to re.
move and cure the
congestion or in
fammation Of the
kidneys that is in.
terfering with their
work and causing
that pain t h a t
makes you say:
"Oh, my back"
Thompson Wat,
kins, professional
nurse, 420 N. 23rd
st., Parsons, Kan.
SAWS. stE0r Soma
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

time I was annoyed with sharp twinges
across the small of my back and ir-
regular passages of the kidney secre-
tions. Since using Doan's Kidney Pills.
I am free from these troubles"
Remember the name-Doan's. Sold
by all dealers. so cents box. Fostel.
Nilburn Co., Buffalo. N. Y.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Natural Deduction.

Naggsby-Griggs told me to-day that
his wife had never spoken a cross
word tc him during their ten years of
married life. g..
Mrs. Naggsby--Poor woman! Has
sbe bssn = deat mute all her life.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Not Her Heart,

Does your heart ever reach out for
the unattainable?"
mo, but my hands do when my hus.
band is not at home; there are three
buttons in the back of my gowns that
I just cannot reach"
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
New Points Of View

He--My dear, the authorities are
down on this rat business, and in
tend to rid the house of all that are
In it.
She-I am very glad to hear you
cay SO. need new ones badly.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
.lfR Kind.

What will be the fruit of the dis
covery of the north pole?"
Il guess it's fruit will be bananas" {"
What do you mean?"
why. aren't its discoverers coming
along In bunches?"
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
CANADA FOR INDEPENDENCE

Some optimistic persons in Canada believe the
day is not far distant when the Dominion will
become republic independent of England. In
such an event, they believe, Sir Wilfrid Laurier
would become the head of the new nation
When the imperial council of defense sent
out from London recommendations that included
the construction, manning and operation of
Canadian war navy protests arose from all parts
OF the Dominion. The actual government meas
ure presented by Sir Wilfrid to the house of COM
mons has caused another outburst, which indi-
Gates clearly that many Canadians look forward
to ultimate independence
The defense council suggested that Canada
build one Dreadnaught three cruisers, six de-.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
Hot Water from Electricity.

A substitute for the kitchen range
as source Of supply for hot water
has recently been introduced in Eng
land. An iron block, cast round a
coil of pipe, is heated by small elec-
trio heater placed in a chamber in it's
center. Outside the block is circu-
lar tank containing the water, which
in its course through the coil is heat
ed. The electric current for the heat
er comes from the regular house sup
ply for lighting. As the apparatus
stores considerable heat, it may be
cut of when the current is required
for light without affecting the supply
of hot water. On the other hand, me
heaters may be permanently connect:
ed, with the electric main. indepspd-
ents Of the light current. ; 5
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
HE'LL BE THE CAFE KING

Henri Pruger, for the last seven years general
manager OF the Hotel Savoy, London, has been
engaged as general manager of the new Cafe de
lOpera in New York City at a salary of $50, 900.
Ihis 1t is believed, is the largest salary paid to
any restaurant manager in the world. Mr.. Pru-
ger is president of the company that will operate
the restaurant which has just been opened It
occupies an entire building on the west side Of
broadway, between Fortysecond and Forty-first
streets.
In London Mr. Pruger has become known to
thousands of Americans. Before going to the
Savoy he conducted the Grand Hotel Nationale
Leizone, and a chain of hotels in southern Eu-
rope, including the Grand Hotel at Monte Carlo
he 0fo al al
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

Il realize keenly
keep any thoroughly alive American
rants this city which have sueos the
lOpera desire add
brought
begins
in furnishings and decorations feel
lies
old friends in London opportunity America
a beautiful the afe de
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

President Taft has selected Judge horace
Harmon Lurton to fill the vacancy in the United
States supreme court caused by the death of Asso-
ciate Justice Rufus w. Peckham.
Judge Lurton has been judge of the sixth
judicial circuit of the United States circuit court
of appeals the district including Tennessee, Ken
lucky, Ohio and Michigan.
Judge Lurton, prominent Tennessee Demo-
crat, even though he has never held elective Of
fce is an ex-confederate soldier and in Michigan
is known as the man who once decided a street
car case against the late Governor Pingree.
Mr.. Taft's service on the circuit bench with
Judge Lurton convinced him Of the integrity and
rectitude Of that jurist. His later contact with
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
THE NEW DISH.

What do you call this-ice pud.
ding?"
We'll, sir, it used to be called ice
pudding, but now it is known as the
north pole, or the Cooks SURPRISE"
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
An Ever Ready OPENING.

The editor suddenly became con-
scious that some one was standing be-
hind him. Looking round, his glance
fell upon seedy looking individual
with the eyes OF a crank.
Il beg your pardon" said the new
conner, 'but is there an opening here
for first-class intellectual writer?"
"Yes," grimly responded the editor.
IAN ingenious carpenter, foreseeing
your visit, has provided an excellent
opening. Turn the knob to the right,
and do not slam the door as you &C
out."-The Sunday Magazine.
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
A Risky Thing.

II think I'll go home"
But it's only II O'Clock. old man."
'Well, there's nothing doing at the
club
81 know: but consider. Once
went home at II o'clock and came
near establishing a dangerous ?rece'
dent"
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24


noticed
and mt to
General Rucker
OF certain life which,
Jefeson
Greatly ritated
the O
The
dence in favor such upposion
viewpoint
had nothing polyhough
n in
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
.sAckAcHE is KlpNEYAcHE.
Usually There Are Other TroubIes %
Prove Il.

Pain: in the back Is pain in the kid
neys, in most cases, and it points to
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

1Otal ...... .$f.Oo
The present claimant against Cook
county is Bernard Swensen, who lives
In the township of Orland in the re-
mote southwestern corner of the
county Somewhere in the mazes of
the statute books of the state is law
which provides for a bounty on crows
at the prices named in Swensen's
claim. 1t also provided that the heads
of the crows and the eggs shall be
turned over to the town clerk for de-
struction; also that he shall make a
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24

n HlCAGO. - The following bill
- against the County of Cook therat.
ems to share the sad fate Of the claim
of one of Mark Twain's heroes for
the Indians while his grandfather was
trying to deliver it to one of the army
posts on the plains:
To killing four crows at 10c. ....$ 40
To destroying 73 crows eggs at
5c 3G5
The Virginia enterprise., 1909-12-24
is OLDEST ARMY OFFICER

Brigadfer-General Daniel H. Rucker, retired,
is not only the oldest officer of the United States
army now living but also the oldest man that
has ever been in the military service of this
country.
The lapse of time since his birth is most viv.
idly realized when it is considered that General
Rucker has lived in every presidential admins
tration since the government began, save only
three-those of Washington, Adams and Jefer-
son. He was born only 13 years after the death
of the first president and among his friends and
acquantances have been good many people who
knew George Washington
But anybody who saw the general to-day would
never imagine that these things could be true.
He is quite as spry and youthful in his WAYS al
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
Stomach Misery
Get Rid of that Sourness, Gas
and INDIGESTION

Do it today: go right straight to e.
r. Petty and get a 50-cent box OF Mi-o-
ma stomach tablets and relieve that
stomach distress in five minutes by the
clock.
When your stomach is out of order
or run down your food doesn't digest. 1t
ferments in your stomach and forms
gas, sourness, heartburn, foul breath,
pain at pit of tomach and many other
miserable symptoms.
Mi-o-nas stomach tablets will give joy
full relief in five minutes; il taken reg
ularly for two weeks they will turn
your flabby, sour, tired-out stomach
into a sweet. energetic perfect working
one ready to properly digest any and
all food you put in it.
You can't be very strong and vigor-
Gus If your food only half digests.
Your appetite will go and nausea, dir
ziness, b~iliousness, nervousness. sick
headache and constipation will follow.
Mi-o-na stomach tablets are small
and easy to swallow n are guaran-
teed. Sold by druggists everywhere
and by =, Petty.
FIJI . large box
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
HY0MEI
(ADMxAGxD MSy-0,M

Cures catarrh or money back. Just
breathe itin. Complete outfit, including
Inhaler q. Extra bottles 50c. Drusg1sts.l
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
D., L. & W. ASKS HEARING ON
OPENING BROADWAY AGENCY.
Especial to The Newark Star. !

TRENTON, Nov. s.-claiming that
the Supreme Court did not understand
the atur of the review when it re-
Gently sustained an order. issued by the
State Board of Railroad Commissioners
ordering the Delaware. Lackawanna
and Western Railroad Company to re-
establish an agency at Broadway, War
rem county, M. M, .Stillman, counsel for
the company, today applied to the
Supreme Court to have the case re-
argued.
court that # Il should be decided to
entertain the MOTION he would like to be
heard in opposition.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
Plan for Celebration.

Christmas will be celebrated by the
Schwaebischer Saengerbund In ar un-
usually elaborate way this year. At a
meeting in its headquarters in. SPRING
field avenue last night this committee
of arrangements was appointed: Gott-
heb Bohnenberger, Victor Blindt, Ed
ward Wasserbast, Fritz Stub and Carl
Sonneck. The society decided to at
end several festivals during the cur
rent month.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
AGED MANS GIFTS TO CHARITY.

BURLINGTON, Nov. 9.-George ELL
wood Fancoast, of Mount Holly, an
aged philanthropist, has presented to
the board of managers of the Bnrling-
ton County Home for Aged Women, IN
this city, two properties, n e a house
end lot in South Burlington and the
other a similar property in Beverly. MI,
Pancosst Is 30 years did.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09

rangements for the dance to be given
in Doe,ger's Hall Thanksgiving ve:
Adolph Schwarzmann, George Jacob,
Robert Moke. Johr Dormeyer, r.
Hengle, Charles Loeffier, L. Hahn and
John Spielmann. The society's head
quarters are Loefier's Hail, 467 SPRING
field Avenue.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09

make it interesting for someone, but as
yetsthese is no definite clue as 10 the
incendiary. The blaze was but of
a dozen fncefdiaiy fires in sshis city
within the last mouth
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
Crowd mt Package Party.

Nearly two hundred members and
guests of the Eintracht Spar verein at
tended its package party and dance in
Kinast's Hall, Springfield avenu and
Tenth street, last night. Kattner's Or
chestra furnished the music. Mrs. Alma
Eyrich headed the committee OF ar
rangements. assisted by Mrs. Rose Zinc.
Mrs. Louisa Koenig and Mrs. Anna
Stuehler.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
CIVIC BALI TOMORROW.

The Home for the. Aged "a Stirling
street viii hold its third annual post
Office and civic ball in the Kruger
Auditorium tomorrow night.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
Society song FestIyal.

Active members of the M. G. v. Har-
monte had a society song festival In
their headquarters, Trensch's Liberty
Hall, South Orange avenue, last night
Several Of the old-time favorites
choruses were sung. They will be heard
at the next concert of this popular or
g~anization.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
GERMAN SOCIETIES.


Rehearsals were held by the Badische
Liedertafel in it's headquarters, Eighth
street and Sixteenth avenue last night,
under the baton of Adalbert Fuhge.
One committee is busy arranging the
Christmas celebration and another a
family festival.
The Newark star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1909, 1909-11-09
To Celebrate Anniversary.

An excellent program has been pre-
pared by the M. g.. v. Phoenix for the
150th birthday anniversary celebration
of Friedrich Schiller, the great German
poet. tonight. 1t will take place in Hart
wigs Hall, Paramount avenue.