Evening star., 1909-06-19

business with me- And if you can't help
me by at least opening your face once
in while. how dye expect me to get
through with this checking up job?
Say. look-a-here. what's this" one
lobster dollar and half? Now, be
gin to squirm about that, why don you !:
] spose you'll be telling me that | ate
that whole dollar-and-a-half lobster my
selfo | recommend you to be prompt
and explicit with reference to this dollar
and-a half lobster. You want to keep
it i'm mind. too. that ! don't eat lobster,
and that I've never seen lobster on my
household table. because even If you do
like the fool things. l don't, and l guess
I've got right to entertain one or two
little prejudices of that sort. much as
you'll be disposed to deny that PROPOSE
ton. Well. I'm waiting Is this charge
correct OF did the man get 1t on our
account by mistake? oh, you got the
lobster to make lobster salad for that III
tie luncheon party of women you han
here the other day, eh? Ih-huh. All
right ! haven't anything to say about
that OF course. 1 wouldn't dare to open
my mouth with regard to 1t. But It's
wonder to me that you wouldn't feed the
women that come to these hen parties OF
yours-it's "A wonder you wouldn't give
'em tilliloo birds tongues and things like
that They'd cost more than lobster. You
know and that ought to help lot. ac-
cording to your way of looking AT tllhss
And say how often do you give these
anyhow I'll bet they've been here to
luncheon eight or ten times this month
already. Wonder if they think I'm rum
ming free lobster shack here?
"Oh. nov. for heavens sake don't be-
gin that old wall that I'm trying to
separate YOU frCm every friend you ever
had. All I'm saying is that it's a wonder
to me that these women wouldn't De anie
to get along on something else besides
lobster every time they jump in here to
a IL
you'd yell murder in nine different Ian
guages if | tried to feed the fellows
who drop in here once every year or so
for a game of cards-if | tried to put
lobster before them. can hear you now
Oh. well. what's the use?
by the way. where's the telephone
bill? Oh. here it is. Thunder and
blazes. What's the meaning of this?
Eight dollars and forty cents for a tele-
..Oh. say, bjinks. this is too much of II
good thing. | simply won't stand for
this. I'm going To find out about this
| can stand htched like old Dubbn and
tolerate lot, but this is rubbing it
in. Eight forty for Il telephone bill. It's
outrageous. It's scanda,ous! This is
the last straw that breaks the camefs
back What do sou do, sit down at the
telephone the minute l leave the house in
the morning and spend a the rest of the
day calling up your bunch of women
friends and discussing the latest fiction
with them and talk about SHIRT waist em-
broidery and shadow work and the best
remedy for strawberry hives, and all that
kind o junk? Or do you take the tele-
phone receiver down ard forget to hang
it up. and thus allow my telephone bill to
pile up? OR do you let all of the women
in the neighborhood do their tel .phoning
III here?
BY George. I'm going to find out about
this If you sit there like a wooden
image and refuse to open your mouth,
then there's another WAY of finding out.
I'll just call up the telephone company
AID ask them to give me an ii amiZed
list of calls. with the numbers. and III
trace this thing To the bottom. that S
what l will I'll stand imposition up TO
jsst a certain point. but then l boil over.
III just get that telephone manager on
the wire. and Il!-hows 5 that" The bill $
so big this month because l talked twice
on the long-diStance wire to that, friend
OF mine in New York?
oh. we'll. it's my own fault. | went
into this game wlth my eyes wide open.
l made my bed. and now it's my busi-
ness 10 lie upon it. I've got no right
to hleat after the idiot ! made of my
self when l got into this matrimonial
mess,