Evening star., 1909-04-18
CHAPTER XII-Continued.

But il Col. OgiIvie thinks himself in
su'ted-that is how he regards any neg
lect. however trivial-he acts on that
belief. and there is no possible hold
ing him back. He looks on it as a sacred
duty to ayenge affront. You must not
blame him for it. In your peaceful Eng
lish life you have, I think no parallel to
the ungovernable waves of passion that
rage in the hearts of kentuckans when
they consider their honor is touched.
All. we poor women know it who have to
suffer in silence and wait and wait and
wait; and when the worst is made known
TO us, to seal up the founts of our grief
and pretend that we, too. agree with the
avenging of wrong. For 1t is our life to
be silent in mems quarrels. We are not
given a part-any part. We are not sup
posed to even look on. 1t is another
world from ours and we have to accept II
so. Please God may You never know what
IL is to be in or the fringe of a feud.
Well l know its dread. its horror. My
own life that years ago was as bright and
promising as any young life can be when
the love that has dawned on my girihood
rose and beat with MONDAY heat on my
young womanhood made it seem as il
heaven had come down TO earth. And
then the one moment of misunderstanding
the quick accusation-the quicker retOrt
and my poor heart lying crushed be-
tween the bodies of two men whom l
loved each in his proper way.
Think of what l say, If only on account
of what I have suffered.
Forgive me, But my anxiety lest any
such blight should come across young
life that I love far. far beyond my own
is heavier on me. / have lost myself in
sad thoughts of a bitter past . In
deed you must take 1t that my earnest
ness in this matter is shown in the lurid
light of that past. | have been silent
cloud burst over me have I said word
To soul-not to my sister-nor to JOY.
whom I adore and whose questioning 10
me of my love affair-as they still call
II when they speak of it's so sweet
Tightening bond between us. ! have only
said 10 her and then he died. and my
heart has seemed TO stop beating. BE
patien, with me and don't blame me.
You are "A man and can be tolerant. Think
not OF me or any gloom of my !iie. but
only that makes me sadly. SrlmiE. terri
bly, in earnest when see similar clements
OF tragedy drawing close TO each other
before my eyes You may oe inclined 10
laugh at me-though ! know YOU will not
and TO put down my thinking OF possible
great uuarrels arising from such small
causes as an old maids fears. But when
| have known the awful effect oi mere
passing word. misunderstood 10 such
disastrous result. no wonder that | have
fears 1t is due to that very cause that
my fears are those of an old maid. i
SuDpOSe / need not ASK YOU 10 oe sure 10
keep all this locked in your own breast
It is my secret: i have shared it with You
because | deem such necessary for the
happiness of-of others. | have Kept IT
so close that not even those nearest and
dearas, 10 me have even suspected II. The
rowdiness OF spirit-as il seems 10 me
wh.ch .other friends call fun and bright
ness and high spirits and other such IN
smiling terms-has been my domino as
have passed through the hollow-hearted
carnival of life. Judge then how earnest
I am when | put ii aside and raise my
mask for YOU. stranger whom | have
seen but twice, ! who even then was but
an accessory--a super on the little stage
where We began To act our Httle-comedy
or tragedy which is II 70 he?
There, | have opened TO you my MEM
ory not my heart That yon have no use
FOR After such letter as this | shall
moi pretend 10 go back t2 the proprieties,
tho conyenances. IL | am right in my
surmise-you can guess what tiat : or
why have YOU written to the old ruNdy
ann, instead there = every reason
Ohy / should be frank. BUT remember