davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Very Human.
From the Washington Post.

From the Washington Post.
The engineer took another slice of the
breast and a spoonful of cranberry
sauce.
''That voyage" he resumed, was from
room two ohimpanzees. We kept them
in cage at first, but they were SO gen.
tie and intelligent that we soon let them
out.
THE female showed not the least de-
sire to neglect her young ones, but de-
voted all her time and attention to them.
The male, we noticed, took the greatest
possible interest In the actions of the
engineer.
when we first let him free the engines
had been stopped for more than a couple
of hours. However, he took up an oil
can, crept in among the machinery, and.
after first putting the back Of his paw
against the bearings, as he had seen the
engineers do when trying II the metal
was getting hot he oiled the engine as
IL he had been at the business for years.
"Of course. the thing was only piece
of mimicry. He did not know why the
men put the back of their hands to the
bearings. and he did not know that no
sane man would do such a thing whom
the engines had been stopped 50 long; but
to see the mother at home minding the
house and the babies. while the father
went to his work in among the machinery
with oil can, struck me Is more human
than anything / had read about apes.
From first to last. the female never
took the least interest In the engine, but
any time the male got chance no would
take the oil can and get to work
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
MOTORMAN WINS
WRESTLING MATCH
Jacobs
Pharmacy

J.. K. Cutrer, the motorman who stars
on the mat, last night at the HIPPO
drome added another scalp to his col
lection. George Cutlanos, the lightweight
Greek, put up game fight, though he
was generally regarded mentally un-
sound to expect victory over MS
weighty opponent. The nrst fall was
speedily gained by Cutrer, the time re-
quired being 81 minutes. The second time
it took the motorman only 81 minutes to
down the Greek.
The match. or to be more accurate,
the mix-up was far from satisfactory
to those who witnessed it. The disparity
of weight between the two was the sub
ject of much speculation. Cutrer fs said
to tip the scales at 164 pounds, while the
Greek claims his weight is 1872. Cut
lanos appeared some time ago In match
with Ben Lmster, an amateur wrestler
whom in an hours time he failed TO
throw. That the Greek should expect
any sort of a show with Cutrer Is con-
sidered improbable. General belief points
to the fact that the loser gained by his
defeat about as much as the victor.
Linn Chamberiin acted as referee In
the match.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mai. r. A. Kendall tells Of what he
considered at the time the greatest prac-
teal joke ever played The Joker was a
former college ciassmate Of his named
Smith, down In New York.
Smith conceived the Idea of having a
lot of fun with the Smiths. for the lack
Of originality about his own name had
always amused him.
He made the acquaintance of q long list
of Smiths, few If any of whom knew each
other. Then he arranged for big party
and invited tons of Smiths Nobody was
invited but Smiths.
When the host started to INTRODUCES
them: Mr.. Smith, this ID Mr.. Smith,
or mr.. Smith, Miss Smith, or Mrs.
Smith Mr.. Smith," the Smiths thought
it was some joke-oh, but not the same
joke that it really was. Each smith
thought the other Smiths weren't Smiths
at ALL but that they were being kiddsd
about the Smith name. and all proceeded
to get as mad as dog.
They went about asking each other their
their real names. AT Last though, It ap-
peared that the Smiths had q sense OF
humor, and when the truth dAwned on
them and was confirmed, they pitched In
and pulled all sorts of comedy out Of the
affair, and the Smith joke party was .
big success
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
MURPHY DOES NOT
DENY OWNERSHIP

Chicago, November 2s.-Charles W.
Murphy, president of the Chicago Ma
tional Baseball club. on his return from
the east today refused to deny that he
is now part owner of the Philadelphia
club of the National league ana also re-
fused to say anything in connection
with the league presidential nomfna-
ton. He did say, however, that he had
not made trade of Heinie thinner
man for Otto Knabe and a pitcher as
had been reported from Philadelphia
and that no deal had been made where
by Catcher John king is to 60 to the
Philadelphia club. Regarding the re-
ported statement of President Horace
Fogle Of the Philadslphia club that
he had sent . Oh COX for $4,000 to
Murphy for the purchase Of King. Mr..
Murphy declared he had received no
such check.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Triple Tie Result In
Great Billiard Match

New York. November ga triple
tie for the worlds professional IS. 2
baIk line billiard championship result
ed from today's play in the tourna-
ment at Madison Square Garden. SUIT
ton defeated Cassignol in the afternoon
game. 500 to 487. The French cham
pion began his game brilliantly, gain
ing heavy lead on Sutton in the fourth
inning by making his high run of 1876
followed in the fifth by a run of rs.
sutton added only seven points to his
score In the next five innings, but be-
gan a series of two figures tallies in
the eleventh, taking the lead from Cas-
signol in the fifteenth. Sutton held his
advantage until the twentieth when
Cassignol made run of o. and took
the front for single inning, until
sutton regained his place with tally
of AZ.
Sutton's average was 20 and he had
high run of as, while Cassignols
average was 1917 2-B.
The two winners Of today are tied
, with Harry P. Cline of Philadelphia.
each OF the three having completed his
schedule with four games won and
one lost.
One game is still to be played in the
regular series between Slossou and
Cutler and this will BIO decided Thurs
day afternoon, while the triple tie for
hrst place will be played out in three
games. Demarest playing Cline We'd
nesday, the loser of that match play
ing Sutton Thursday, and tho winners
Of the two matches playing on Friday.
The Demarest- Slosson match tonight
was . close argument for the frst half
Of the game. but In the latter half
DsmArest scored heavily. going out in
the thirty-second inning with . bril-
liant unfinished run of 81 and winding
by q score Of 500 to 864
Slosson made remarkable run Of
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
NEW RULES FOR
BOXING CONTESTS

London. November 2s-With view to
the further announcement and promo
ton of the art of self defense the news
paper, Sporting Life, with the Earl Of
Lonsdale's approval, and the promise Of
his assistance. has started a movement
for an international board on which
Great Britain and the United States
each will have two representatives and
Australia and France each one. The OBJ
jects of the board are:
First, to frame rules to govern inter-
national championships.
Second, to fix weights for such cham
pionships.
Third, to decide who is entitled to
claim championships.
Fourth, to supply belts and trophies TO
recognized champions.
II is suggested that Lord Lonsdale be
elected president of the first board.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30

Paris, November 2s.-King Manuel of
Portugal attended a performance at the
opera this evening. and this was made the
occasion of another exploit by King"
Pataud, secretary of the electricians'
union. who. few minutes before the
performance began, sent an ultimatum TO
the MANAGEMENT that the salaries of the
electricians must be increased or the cur
rent would be cut of. M. Broussan, d.
rect of the opera. had no alternative but
to comply with the demand.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Six Months in Jail.

Spokane, Wash, November @.-John
Pancner. one of the leaders of the Indus
trial workers Of the World. convicted Of
conspiracy, was sentenced today to six
months in jail at hard labor. Evidence
was introduced that Pancner had come to
this city to fight the ordinance regulating
street speaking, and that he had sent out
kilograms to nearby towns calling for
''men to hght the jails in Spokane" He
appealed from the decision.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Short n HIs Accounts.

Pittsburg, Pa. November @.-William
c. Lilley, former treasurer Of the Fits
burg presbytery. who disappeared from
this city on September %. Is short $21.-
0S4S4 in his accounts with the church,
according to statement given out today
by the board of trustees Of the presby-
tory. The entire fund from the sale OF
the Fourth Presbyterian church. this
city, SIS IL charged to Llley's ac-
count
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
CAPTURED BY Posse.

Aberdeen. 8. D., November 2s.-One OF
the Cant brothers, charged with the MUIR
der OF Louis Maxwell, at Enselvale. was
captured by posse near Britton yester-
day. The older brother, who did the
shooting. is being chased by a posse.
The captured man is but IS years old.
He was armed with a rife and two re-
volvers, but made no resistance The
Cant brothers are Texas cowboys.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Secretly Married for Months.

Bristol. Tenn. November 2s.-Mrs. N.
G. Armstrong, manager Of the Armstrong
hospital. announced tonight that she was
secretly married in Louisville in August
last to Edwin X. Ream. son of Norman
II. Ream. the well-known Chicago capi-
talist. The couple will reside In Bristol,
having already leased residence.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30

North Sydney. N. 8. W.. November o.
Fourteen persons are supposed to have
persisted in the wreck OF the schooner
Little Jap, which sailed from Deer Is
land. Newfoundland, on November 20, for
Z trip along the Newfoundland coast
Since that date nothing has been heard
OF the vessel until today when the dis
mantlsd hull was washed ashore ut Red
Gi6, newfoundland.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Medley Made Captain.

Nashville, November 2s-At the annual
banquet of the Vanderbilt football team
tonight. Quarterback William Nesly OF
Nashville was chosen to captain tho squad
next season.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Jacobs
Pharmacy

123 in his eleventh. Demarest played
rapidly and brilliantly throughout The
contest, making his final run of So in
less than eight minutes
Slosson's average was II 1921, to
Demarest's Is 2o-32
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Wild Animals He Didn't Know.

VHo <ntmaiS TO Diont NnoW. s
From the Delineator.
Mamma" said S-year-oid James, IT
want an apple"
Help yourself, my child"
'Theys all gone"
ooh, no. there are plenty down In the
cellar. Can not you run down and get
one for you and one for mamma, there's
q dear
us afraid.!'
IT guess not; you're such . big boy"
James thrust his hands under his belt
and after one look at his mother smiling
ly trotted OF. Coming back quickly with
one apple and looking pale. he ran to his
mamma and leaning on hsr lap, looking
very serious, said: Mamma
what IL It, my childr'
II run'd bfore got yours cause saw
. big later with q string tied to It run
cut . barrel and up the wall"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-30
Big Crowd at basketball Game.

Florence, November 29-fSpecial "A
large crowd and great enthusiasm attend
ed the double-header played Saturday
afternoon between the State Normal col
lege and Florence university basketball
teams on the Normal college grounos.
In the first game the teams appeared
evenly matched, the score being to s.
In the second game the grearer exps-
rience of the Normal team told and they
outplayed their opponents at every point,
The score was II to g. Miss Kathleen
Vaughn and Miss Minnie Briggs Bah
were the stars. the fielding and goal
throwing Of the former and the field
ing of the latter being almost flawless.
D. 8. Burleson was umpire and Miss
Terwiliger referee.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13
CORTELYOU SLATED
AS GAS PRESIDENT
Rumor Current That He Will
Head New York
Company.

That Secretary of the Treasury George
Bruce Cortelyou viii be the next prcsi-
dent of the Consolidated Gas Company
of New York is the report aaoat both
ia Washington and New York.
According 20 tie rumor which has
gained robust proportions. ar. Cortel-
YOU viii step out OF the Treasury De-
partment March f to head the great
gas corporation. Mr. COrtelyou declines
to deny or affirm the report rr TO dis
Cuss IL in any way. New York advices
are that Jhe management Of the COM
paHy denies knowledge 90 the accession
oI Ar. COFtelyOu 90 tla presidency.
Tor months TumOrs have been alOat
10 the erect thai MT. COEtelyCu was
getting ready to retire from public life
and enter the business world. He IS
known to have received a. number of
good offers. These have come from va
rious parts OF the country. SOME OF
them are from the East ana others from
the NVese and. Northwest,
1t Is confidently expected iu official
circles here that Mr. COTtelyOu. when
he leaves the Treasury Department at
the end OF this Administration, will en-
gage in business in New York. he pre-
feTg that city. He was born and
brought up in that state and has al.
ways had his home there.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13
BELIEVE BALKAN
STATES DOOMED
Diplomats Say With Turkey
Disposed Of, Austria
Will Absorb Them.

ST. PETERSBURC Jan. 13.-That the
national integrity of Servia and Monte
negro was doomed the moment Turkey
accepted Austria's indemnity Offer is the
opinion today OF Russian diplomats, who
have taken part IN the Balkan develop
ments. Il is considered inevitable that
Austria viii gradually absorb these two
little states.
With Turkey no longer a menace, il
is not believed that Austria will further
endure trouble from the aggricved coun-
tries.
Reports from Belgrade today say the
anger of the Servian people can no ION
ger be restrained and virtual warfare
on the Bosnian border Is expected at
any time.
Austria's indemnity TO Turkey is 4l8.-
10000, to be paid within a year, but the
total cost OF the annexation Of Bosnia
and Herzegovina is at least 81. 500OGo
This sum is moro than Austria can real
ize from the provinces in the next TWEEN
~ years, according TO the Russian view
point and Austria Ii is believed, will
try to make up her loss by Selling Ser
via and Montenegro as soon as political
conditions in Europe will warrant such
a step
The Servian cabinet is now in ses-
sion, and is adopting the most radical
war measures.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13

II has been a part Of our mission to explain TO
people that the drug, caeine, in coffee seriously affects
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13
Laughter, Digestion
And Health

An eminent Russian physitlan lles
stated his opinion that laughter - 80
OF the best means known 20 ati- 49, ~.
the correction OF Dyspepsia Sto''i3.'-N
ana nervous diseases.
Laughter however iu dyspePtig -
ike the memory of running DToohs jus
shady gieus to the furnishing ana osi'a
man lost ln the desert.
IL ore could but know all the causes
reasons, and origins OF Dyspepsla' ono
would not wonder at nali-hc II l7e4'
ness OF dyspeptic.s gslety.
There is q ccaseless call for apPt Itrs
Good and enjoyment TO dyspep 5i.
coupled with T. morose, moody heheE
and knowledge that sUch sail -
mockcry and if INDUCED IN viii Sflns
discoW f-rt, paiul and regret
Perhaps III il were UNDERSTOOD tlaa
the digestive system, including mouths
throat, and 5limcntarI canal eInofd1-
ing as e does me stomach IS composed
of membraueous tissue filled with NIL
lions OF sm8H nerves, which conttot
added millions OF little mouths or
suckers Perhaps 81 this were known
men could more COMPROMISING undeI@
stand thaL to disaFIanse sucH q So
tenn voula mean indeed intense physicaA
Sow suppose that this alimentary
canal is n mass Of WORKOUT, deniitate2
nerves ana mouths, each suIeFlhg eA~
crIlclaIiug physical pain ana dlsCoHIoIts
SUPPOSE SUCH L-lAi1l lLtLHtA VIII
fumes aud foul odors and decayed tooa
from the last meal. and one has sllghs
idea as to the lack of laughter Of a dys~
pc ptic.
Stuarus Dyspepsia Tablets composed
Of the highest digestive ingredient
one grim of single ingredient being
cara5ls Of digesting g. 009 grains %
fOGd-relieves the ahmentary canal or
fts 0Ierous duties. assists IL along is
entire length eco fceU 10 perform lta
gJufine imparts strength and buoy
anc. To the stomach and gives back 10
the bloOd a strong, healthy nouFlshs
meut
stu arts Dyspepsia Tablets are nat
strai adjuucts TO digestion. They do not
-qisaIv stimulate ais already weakened
machine bat build up where building
Us needed and remove where removal ~
aece ssuFy,
stuart g Dyspepsia Tablets have nothing
to conceal Here is what they are made
of. IIydrastic. golden seal. iactose, ana
as site pepsin. Forty thousand physis
ci4T.s ia America and Canada use and
%, 5seribe them They should be used
Ef,o- every hearty meal whether one -
dvsDeDtic OF not
Every druggist carries thems price
SOC. Send us your name and address
and we viii send you d sample package
free Address r. A. Stuart CO.. 10
stuart Bldg Marshall, Mich.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13
JAMES F. OYSTER,
First Vice President.
~zaE0 ~ sAssss Besas

most tasteful and substantial manner,
our present quarters in the Brentano
building. The committee is Of the opin-
ion that much could be added TO the
Identification OF the hall and its gen
eral effectiveness by the purchase of a
few appropriate pictures, and they
recommend that an appropriation for
this purpose be granted by the board
Of directors.
During the year and by order Of ne
board Of directors an audit committee
has been appointed for the purpose OF
examining and reporting upon all OF the
expenditures necessary for the main
tenanCe OF the Chamber. As the cusi-
ness of the body is rapidly growing, the
necessity for such a committee nss
proved It's great Importance or actVal
necessity
II has been made necessary in She
past for the secretary 20 advance money
from time TO time to meet the daily re-
quirements Of his office. This should
not be expected OF him or OF any officer.
The board or directors has met the con
dltious by which such contingent or
emergency expenses may be met be-
tween meetings OF the board and not re-
qulre advance by the secretary. A
standing Appropriation Of $50 has been
set aside for this purpose. All disburse-
ment from this fund to be regularly re-
RoFAe4 70 the hLAl ing committee LOT
their examination and final approval BY
the board OF directors as per law.
Committee on Public Schools.
The committee on public schools. Per
cival N. Brown. chairman, reports that
our schools are free from unsettling
disturbances and that the school work
is progressing under favorable con-
ditions.
in regard 20 school buildings, fire
protection and sanitary conditions and
the material welfare OF our schools. the
committee believes that only good viii
come TO our school system from the
recent discussion Of these matters, and
that the schools viii receive much beue-
NJ from the thought and effort which
have been devoted to them along these
lines.
A subcommittee has also been ap-
pointed 10 study school conditions on the
material side and TO make such recon-
mendations, II any are deemed Wiss.
looking TO the betterment and improve
Of material conditions in the schools.
Wholesale Trades Committee.
The wholesale trades committee, with
r. P. May as chairman, reports progress
on practical lines. n has during the
year investigated several plans for
bringing 10 washington new lines for
the wholesale and JObbing trade, so
as 20 attract the attention OF new Gus
toners to this city. They have out
lined a practical and inexpensive line
OF advertising for the purpose Of build
ing up a jobbinE business for Washing
ton and have reasons to believe SUCCESS
VIII follow their Efforts
The committee on commerce and
Continued on Twelfth Page
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1909-01-13

opportunities OF becoming a retail cen
ter or no small proportion, and cited
as a partial reason for such conclU-
sion the vast sums OF money paid out
by the Government each month 20 Its
army Of employees. While this Is true
and our merchants are fortunate in hay-
ing such a constant ana unceasing flow
OF currency turned into the channels Of
trade &c has developed upon careful in
FestigaJion by a specials committee on
salaries with d 5. Porter as chairman.
that although much good has come to
the District from this source, the aNaT-
age salary to q Government clerk is
not what IL should be.
After an exhaustive investigation OF
the subject. the committee ind il In
advisable to take up the question on
the lines OF readjustment as suggested
by the Keep Commission. but preferably
TO conhne .ts efforts to the establishment
plOyes under the United States and
District Of Columbia Government, The
reasons given b. the committee are most
practical, and their conclusions are
largely based upon the increased cost
or llying to the average household
A careful and detailed investigation OF
thls phase or the question has been
made by A. LisneT, a member Of the
committee. The results Of his researches
are made a part OF the committee re-
port, and to him credit is given. IL de-
yelOps from this report that a clerk
receiving sl,400 per anuum, with fam
lily or nve 20 support. viii have less than
Alb At the end Of the year 70 meet all
the demands Of the family other than
those which are termed the absolute
necessities Of living for himself and
those depending upon him
Average Salary.
The report, continuing, states that
the average salary Of a Government
clerk Is Sl,0T.65" There are nearly
$4,000 employees under the Government,
and out Of this number 2,4Tl receive a
salary OF Loo. that 1895 get more than
81 $50, and that 6,5m receive less than
$780, that 2.235 receive salaries between
$40 and $40 with such compensation
paid out 20 men and women many OF
whom are Of the highest educational at
talnments. no one can question the JUS
uce of the committees recommendation.
Further investiEa tlO7s by is commit
tee develops the fact that FROM a. recent
and reliable source OF information, the
cost OF clothing has advanced since 1900
80 per cent bleached goods ginghams.
etc, from " 70 90 per cent. The wages
Of ordinary labor have increased about
80 per cent food for general consump-
ton has increased Is per cent, and the
salary OF the clerks Of the progressive
merchant has also increased. The com
peusatiDu OF the Government clerk re-
mains as OF old
In conclusion the report asks mat the
Chamber OF Commerce urge uEOa Con-
grcss Cor adequate paw bV the Govern
ment for its clerks and not trade upon
their helplessness, and also to urge upOn
that body the justice iu making the
average salary 3l,4o0 per auuum, an iu-
crease Of 3 per cent.
House Committee.
This committee has been OF no little
value TO the Chamber during the past
year. It has rented and furnished in e