Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-12-22
Letter to Santa Claus.

USSSg vi VIC SSA HsASfHE
The Advertiser has: sent the follow
ing to- Santa Claus by special deliv.
cry:
When you come this way Fri
day next please bring Edgefeld a
public we'll that willaford adequate
water supply for man and beast, to
say nothing of fire protection.
Please carry all ofiyoar toy pis-
tolls and psrlor rifles to some other
place. Edgefeld doesn't need any
more. 3
Please bring a cushion for the
skating rink floor.
Please pull the scales from the
eyes and the moss from the backs
of some of Edgefeld'si citizens.
Please bring some. footease and
one-night ache cure for Edgefeld's
army of faithful, foot-sore clerks.
Please bring a Stork along with
you. He, she, or it, seems to have
deserted Edgefeld, and,Jthink of it,
next year is census year,
Please bring a free passport to
the blind tigers or take them along
with you to Aiken, the town they
like SO much to visit.
Please bring Edgefeld more lights
and better lights.
Please bring only cold suppers
talong with you. We don't need
ANY "hot suppers" in Edgefeld
county, especially "durin' de Girls
mus"
Please bring The Advertiser office
a full set of new press rollers. The
old ones cause the foreman and
"devil" both to mutter unprintable
words and their religion is in great
Jeopardy. Please make special note
of this request, Santa Claus.
Please hasten the visibility Of
Halley's comet. Edgefea people
are impatiently waiting onStip-toe.
Please stay the hand of the
gossip-killer until after. the emu
merator takes Edgefeld's census,
lest our population show a great de
crease.
Please bring along a few dozen
new residences, the demand for
homes being greater, in Edgefeld
than the supply.
Please be especially kind to the
county's. official family. No county
has more deserving public servants
than Edgefeld's.
Please bring a lower tax levy for
1910.
Please give the faithful ministers
throughout the county q pounding
such as they never had before. They
deserve your best.
Please bring the banks borrowers
for their idle thousands.
Pleasebring sufficient public funds
Ito pay the faithful school teachers
lin cash SO they will not be compel
led to discount their certificates at
90 cents.
Please advance the price of west
ern bacon and corn so the people of
Edgefeld will be forced to make
their living at home, and let the
price of cotton keep pace.
Please, Santa Claus, when you Wis
Fit The Advertiser household take
three cats away with you. By SO
doing you will not only confer a fav-
or upon the paterJamtlas, but add
greatly to the joy and happiness of
his Christmas.
Please BRING us a rail:
road that will "unbottle" the old
town. We do not care whence it
cometh or whittier it goeth, just so
it will haul freight and passengers
Please fill Col. Bailey's and Mil
ton Jones' socks chockfull of nice
things as a reward fof the great pa
thence and fortitude exercised during
the last two months.
Please remember when you visit
Anderson that Charles Burts belongs
to Edgefeld, and open wide the
~foodgates of your gracious soul.
Please tell all the. fakirs you
chance to meet that al. Edgeheld
suckers are dead and that they need
n OF come this way.
Please bring Sam Marsh purchas-
ers for his Tamworth sows and pigs.
There are just nine-hundred and
ninety-one farmers, by actual count,
in Edgefeld County who need sows
and pigs.
Please send, when you return
aome, a snow eleven inches deep in
January that will improve the thou