davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
Humor aue Philosophy
By DUNCAN N. SMITH
THE MODERN EXHIBIT.

Once the wise ones shook their heads
Progress all was done;
Said that there was nothing new
Underneath the sun;
Everything was vanity,
All had been before.
But these croakers do not now
Harp upon that score.
Nothing new? Why. bless your eyes.
Look around and see
If there is a single thing
AS it used to be!
New inventions at the door
Every morning wait.
II thing is twelve months old,
1t Is out of date.
Did the ancients ever have
merry Widow" hats?
Did they navigate the air.
Agile quite as bats?
Did they use an auto car
For a pleasure ride?
Did they chase the trolley train
Through the countryside?
No, and neither did they have
Any telephones:
Never did the monograph
Charm them with its tones,
Storage chickens, fruit on ice.
Night turned into day.
Is there still beneath the sun
Nothing new? Oh, say!
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

The most successful farmer in Mis-
souri, is David Rankin. He is the
greatest farmer on earth. He owns in
the neighborhood of Tarkio 25,640
acres. Some men own more land,
which they use as cattle range, but
Rankin is a farmer and cultivates his
land. He has 10000 hogs, 5000 cat
tie, 500 horses; his place is well equip
ped with farm machinery, and on his
land are over 100 cottages in which
the employees of his big farm are
housed. Rankin is of Scotch-Irish
descent, and he began his life in pow
erty as farm hand in Illinois. Then
he removed to Missouri, where he has
been enormously successful.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Sour j1i Stomach belchine
sHo G6S TAKE kOdOl

These symptoms result from indiges-
ton and dyspepsia-brought on by inn
proper eating. If you will merely take
little Kodol, now and then, you can eat
what you want-and you will not have
any digestive trouble. Kodel digests
your food as soon as it reaches your
stomach. 1t does this because itcontains
every element essential to proper food
digestion. Thus you see that Kodol
merely duplicates Natures process, in
your stomach, when your stomach,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
The Argus Daily Short Story
THE KIDNAPER BY BARNEY PRESTON.
Copyrighted, 1908. by Associated Literary Press.

Wicker had evinced something decided
~ more than passing interest.
With q covert chuckle he drew away
from his peephole at the doors. rubbed
the sleep from. his eyes and smoothed
down his tumbled hair as best he
could.
Then he pushed open the doors and
stepped calmly into the cockpit, with
the gravest Of bows to the startled
young woman by the tiller.
And startled she undoubtedly was
so startled, indeed, that sheet and filler
alike slipped from her grasp. and the
knockabout. left to Its own devices,
came suddenly into the wind with a
great tapping of sail and rafting of
sheets.
OH said the girl in Amusement.
Again McVicker bowed.
you'll pardon my intrusion. won't
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

1t is stated on good authority that
Senator Hopkins urged that the Ore
gon republicans should set aside the
verdict of the senatorial primary in
that state and vote for republican
instead of for Governor Chamberlin.
who was the choice of majority OF
the voters of the state. Governor
Chamberlin's title to the senate is
vastly better than that of Hopkins, and
if he advocated setting it aside, Hop
kins certainly cannot complain if some
of his own medicine should be admin.
istered to him.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01


you?" said he. Pm mighty sorry 1
frightened you; but. you see, there was
really no other way Of making my
presence known, and 1t would have
been a shame to miss this chance Of q
sail with you.''
where did you come from, and
what ON earth are you doing hereF'
she asked. To cover her evident en-
barrassment she began trimming in
the sheet and putting the neglected
boat on her course again.
II came from the cuddy," said Nc
Wicker gravely. "and. as to what am
doing. well. am waiting at present for
an invitation to finish your sail with
you"
"How do you happen to be aboard
this knockabout, snywayT she per.
sisted.
We'll. believe own her. At any
rate. there are papers purporting to be
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

through overlooking or ill-treatment of
one sort or another, is unable to do its
own work as Nature intended. This is
why Kodol is such good preparation,
for anyone who has any digestive
trouble, or is likely to haye-as most of
us are. Az
Our Guarantee. Ge' Of q d %odol pot +
You are not benefited-the druggist will
at once return your money. Don't hesi-
tate: any druggist will sell you Kodol on
these terms. The dollar bottle contains
~ times as much as the SOC bottle.
kodOl Is prepared In the laboratories Of
F. c. Dewitt & Co., Chicago.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Representative John Wesley Gaines,
who was silenced in congress last Sat
urday by the first display of the mace
since the days of the Spanish war,
after a hot dispute with Speaker Can
non. in which each accused. the other
of being discourteous,s has been a
member of the house since 1897. He
represents the Sixth Tennessee dis
triet, his home being in Nashville, and
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

There is difference in viewpoint
of Judges Lands and Anderson in the
Standard Oil case. Judge Lands held
in effect that if a burglar visited your
cellar 1G times and stole a bushel of
potatoes each time, each potato stolen
constituted a specific offense. Judge
Anderson rules that only each visit
can constitute an offense.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Mr.. Oglesby while serving in the ca
pacity of acting governor during the
absence of Mr. Deneen to Washington
might send special message to the
legislature recommending that the stay
of Mr.. Deneen at the national capital
be indefinitely prolonged.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
No Use to Die,

81 have found out that there is no
use TO die of lung trouble as long as
you can get Dr. Kings New Discov-
cry" says Mrs. J. p. White of Rush
boro, Pa. Il would not be alive today
only for that wonderful medicine. 1t
loosens up a cough quicker than any
thing else, and cures lung disease even
after the case is pronounced hopeless y
This most reliable remedy for coughs
and colds, la grippe, asthma, bron-
chitis and hoarseness is sold under
guarantee at all druggists. so cents
and 81. Trial bottle free.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

To encourage and elevate the study
of art and music were the objects
which prompted the launching of two
societies in Rock Island Saturday. one
to be known as the Tri-City Art asso-
citation, the other the Rock Island
Musical club. Both are most worthy
and deserving of the highest degree Of
support and success.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Manufacturers who want the presi-
dent to carry their patent folding
pocket typewriters into a big woods
with him, will have to hurry, as the
expedition is soon to pull in the gang
plank and cast off the ropes.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
The Lucky Quarter

is the one you pay out for box of Dr.
Kings New Life Pills. They bring
you the health that's more precious
than jewels. Try them for headache
biliousness, constipation and malaria
If they disappoint you, the price will
be cheerfully refunded at all drug
gists.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

President Taft has mustache and
his cabinet will run to mustaches.
The only whiskers will be those left
over from previous administrations on
the person of Secretary of Agriculture
Wilson. The smooth faces are those
of Knox and Hitchcock. @All the 9th
ers have mustaches of various grizzled
grades = some struggling, some crop
ped, but all plainly manifest.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

A Cody man. widely known and well
beloved, was summoned to his reward
in the passing of the venerable Rev. G,
A. Mennicke. He was the oldest pas
tor in Rock Island by many years and
one of the pioneer ministers of west
ern Illinois. His life was devoted to
the uplifting of humanity and the
strengthening of Christianity. His good
works will live after him.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Uncle Sans outdoors physicians
should see what they can do to break
our somnambulistic rivers of rising
from their beds and wandering all
over the country every spring.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
Had a Suspicion.

George is bright boy all rights
said Flora, but he can't take hint"
81 thought" protested Clara, that
he was particularly quick and apt"
Not my experience with him."
81 only know that when papa kicked
him downstairs the other evening he
seemed to know what was wanted OF
him"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Some bright editorial paragraph
has mustered the courage to say that
it takes a match to light up the faces
of prospective brides and grooms.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

letter, Salt Rheum and Eczema.
These are diseases for which Cham
berlain's Salve is especially valuable
1t quickly allays the itching and
smarting and soon effects cure
Price, % cents. For sale by all drug
gistS.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

A woman who was delayed by a late
train and compelled to remain in
Rome. Ga, over night has sued the
railway company for $1,000. Pretty
tough on Rome.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Your real friend is the man who
laughs when you tell him the same
story about four times.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
Looked SUSPICIOUS.

"Mr. Jones, I wish to marry your
daughter"
"Does she want to marry you"
"She says she does"
"Pshaw! Is that all you know about
women?"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

A good guess often passes for fore
sight and draws salary under the
label.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

On an average being able to draw
his pay regularly constitutes man Of
ability.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
Monday, March J. 1909.

Albert Hopkins still retains his job
on the Burlington, anyway.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

Being a hero may be thrilling and
glorious, but 1t doesn't buy the baby's
shoes.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

1t is a good thing to keep smiling,
but a better to have something to
smile about
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

1t is remarkable what sit -e we set
by our few good qualities, and it is a
secret grief that our neighbors don't
seem to value them as highly.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
No Satisfaction.

No Satisfaction.
"She gave him a piece OF her mind"
"What did he say?'
Nothing"
"Some men are just that mean"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
Natural Bent.

"what we need is education" said
the snail.
II hear the tortoise is going to
school,
How is he getting along?"
"Oh, he is hard student"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
THE ARGUS.

Published Daily and Weekly at 1874
Second eTsnuA ROCK Islana, IN. IEn-
sered At the postoffice as second-class
mAtter.1
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

It is exasperating to see our children
insisting on inheriting our own unlove-
~ qualities. Considering their par
entage, they might evince better taste.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1909-03-01

BY THE J. w. POTTER CO.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15
o. 900. Al Published June $. l9o9.
CHAPTER 2n4. LAWS OF 1909.

AN ACT to create section 1363n OF the
statutes relating to town drains:
krhe people of the State OF Wisconsin repie.
scented in Senate and Assembly, 10 enact
as follows -.
Section l. There is added to the stat
utes a new section to read; Section l3 5ooii,
1. Whenever any proposed dltcn or ulaii
shall cross the right of way or any railway
company street car company or lhter9rp, S.
railway company, the notice requlreur pS ~
section 1860 of the statutes, shaIl "
served within. the time therein prescInO oet,
upon any agent of any such company u t;on
whom service of summons in civil action
might be made -, asa
.. All such bitches or drains shan use
wherever possible the existing bridges or
companies. If such existing bridge OF GU
verts are not of sufficient depth OF eaps1;ttiSy
to correspond with the proposed ulIc ~
drain or enlargement OF wafer coulse ~ ~
carry and properly drain the wafer, nc no
supervisors shall notify such COMPANY ,+op
construct the necessary drain OF ui'en
across its right of way. a4uoo+ cor
g. Such railway company, street gar
company or interurban railway coInpaEtS
shall construct the necessary cuiVettta,
bridges and drains to carry ana uIain Iii Iii
ordinary drainage and surface wafer at t al
water courses and no compensa.lotn and
be made therefor. If the culverts anu
bridges required to be constructed nv
larger and of more expensive chara nndi
than required to carry and drain tue oiu ah
nary drainage ami surface water AZ SUI SUI
water courses. such company shal ps IN
pensated for the additional Go COST % On cni-
structng the necessary ditch, dram OF cn
vert across It's right Of way over anu
above the cost of constructing c,mo,ant
bitches and drains necessary ana suntEisns
to carry and drain the ordinary aFain"se
and surface water.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15
No. 4O2, ST. Published June ). 1909
CHAPTER 2o4 LAWS CE. 1909

AN ACT to create sections 649-35 649-
36, and 649-37 of the statutes, to en-
courage military instruction in a military
school of the state that has been recog-
nlzed and approved by the United States
government
The people of the State of Wisconsin repre-
sented IN Senate and Assembly do enact
as follows:
Section 1. There are added to the stat
utes three new sections to read Section
649-35. I. st. Johns Military Academy
at Delafield, Wisconsin, Is hereby recog-
nized and approved as a military school by
the state of Wisconsin, as long as st.
Johns Military Academy remains recog-
nized and approved by the United States
government as a military school of the first
class, and the governor is hereby directed
to provide for its annual inspection by ap-
three members recommended respectively by
the adjutant-general, the state superintend-
ent of public instruction, and the president
of the state board of health.
2. The governor is furthermore author
lied and directed to appoint and commits
sion the officers of the school as officers of
the national guard of Wisconsin, to rank
as follows: The president as colonel and
aide-de- camp the commandant as inspector
general, with rank of major; and the sur
geon as major of the medical corps:
3, Furthermore any commissioned officer
of the militia of Wisconsin may enter as a
pupil at said military academy, for period
of time not exceeding ten months, and re-
ceive instruction in any or all of the de-
pdFIUleuIS Oh military ScleuCe lueFRI0
taught. without being required to pay any
fee or charge whatever for such instruc-
ton.
shall be construed to require an appropria-
ton.
Section 649-37. The laws and regula-
tons for the Wisconsin national guard
shall be made to conform with this act, and
all acts and parts of acts inconsistent with
this act are hereby repealed.
Section .. This act shall take effect and
be in force from and after it's passage and
publication.
Approved June 5, 1909.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15

cient to support simple contract An
antecedent or pre-existing obligation,
whether for money or not. constitutes value
where a receipt is taken either In satisfac-
ton thereof or as security therefor.
(13) "Warehouseman' means person
lawfully engaged In the business of storing
goods for profit, provided that. this act
shall not apply to common carriers who
store merchandise or other property re-
ceived by them as such common carriers.
2 A thing is done lin good faith" with
In the meaning of this act. when 1t is in
fact done honestly, whether it be done neg
ligently or not.
Section 16S4m-63 The provisions of
this act do not apply to receipts made and
delivered prior to the taking effect of this
act.
Section 16S4m-64. All acts or parts of
acts inconsistent with this act are hereby
repealed
Section 16S4m-65. This act shall take
effect on the first day of September, one
thousand nine hundred and nine.
Section 16S4m-66. This act may be
cited as the warehouse receipts act.
Approved June 3, 1909
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15
No. SSS, Al Published .mne 2 1909
CHAPTER 298, LAWS OF 1903.

AN ACT to amend section 1929. and 10
create section l492e--Sa OF the statutes.
relating TO the practice of veterinary
medicine ana surgery.
The people OF the State of Wisconsin, repre-
sented In Senate and Assembly, do enact
as follows:
utes is amended to read Section l49oe-1
Every unlicensed person who was engaged
in the practice of veterinary medicine and
surgery in this state continuously for a
first of January. 1909, = NAV con.
tinue such practice without examination
providing such person produces
endorsements OF his qualifications as
and surgeon, subscribed and sworn TO by
two hundred and fifty freeholders and own.
ers of livestock residing in the county in
which such veterinarian lives and pro-
vided further that such person make APP
plicatiOn for license TO the Board of Veter-
mary Examiners within thirty DAYS after
the passage and publication of this act. and
upon the payment OF three dollars for his
first license, and annually thereafter caus-
ing his name and residence to be registered
by the board who shall keep book for
that purpose.
Section =. There is added to the stat
utes a new section to read Section
1492e-Sa. The said board OF examiners
are hereby authorized and empowered TO
granted or which may hereinafter be grant
ed for any professional misconduct or
breach of duty by any licensed practitioner
of veterinary medicine and surgery. Pro
vided however, that the said board before
the revocation of said license shall notify
the said licensed practitioner Of the hear
ing. and give to said licensed practitioner
at least twenty days notice in writing Of
the hearing for the revocation of the, IL
cense.
Section $. This act shall take effect
and be in force from and after its passage
and publication.
Approved June D, 1909.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15

AN ACT to amend section 1912 of the stat
utes, relating to fees for agents licenses
and copies
The people of the State of Wisconsin, repre-
sented in Senate and Assembly, do enact
as follows
Section 1, Section 1872 of the statutes
is amended to read Section 1872. 1. Ex-
cept as otherwise provided by law there
shall be paid to the state through the COM
missioner of insurance in addition to the
fees elsewhere in these statutes provided
for by every insurance corporation, per
SON or agent to whom this chapter applies.
the following fees:
(a) For filing the first declaration or
statement, with certified copy of charter,
twenty-five dollars
OBJ For filing the annual statement of
any insurance corporation twenty-five dol
Gc) For each certificate of authority
issued to the agent Of
any company one dollar. A
separate certificate shall be required for
each company represented by an agent and
for each member of any firm;
(d) For every certified copy of a paper
filed in his office, ten cents per
folio:
(e) For certifying and affxing his seal
to any such copy or any other paper, fifty
cents.
Q In case two or more corporations shall
combine to effect Insurance under a joint
policy or policies. each and every such cor
poraton so combining shall pay the fees
above provided the same as If each and
every one wrote separate policies.
Section q This act shall take effect and
be in force from and after its passage and
publication.
Approved June 5, 1909.
Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-07-15

ZJU, LAWS Of 1919.
AN ACT TO amend section 1919 and sub
section / of section 1916 of the statutes,
relating to the license fees Of fire and
marine insurance companies and TO
agents licenses.
The people of the State of Wisconsin rep
resented in Senate and Assembly. do en-
act as follows:
Section l. Section 1919 of the statutes
Is amended to read: Section 1919. 1.
Every company transacting the business of
insurance against fire or by the risk of in
land navigation or transportation.
foTe the thirty dav Of January in or each
year a tax of two per centum
ON the amount Of the gross premiums re-
ceived for direct insurance, less return
premiums and cancellation on direct in
surance, by such company during the
preceding year. in this state.
Direct Insurance shall include all insurance
other than reinsurance. In case any
pany shall discontinue business in this state
and reinSure the whole or a part of its
risks without making payment OF this tax,
the company accepting such reinsurance
saall pay the tax; and if several companies
shall make such reinsurance the tax shall
be apportioned between such companies in
proportion to the original premiums upon
the business in this state, so relnSured by
each such company. Upon the payment of
the tax herein provided such company may
be licensed to transact it's business until
the last day of January in the ensuing year
unless sooner revoked or forfeited according
10 law.
. Excepting domestic mutual insurance
companies included in sections 1920 or
1220a and companies heretofore organized
under sections 1896 to 1900. inclusive. nc
domestic mutual insurance company shall
be required to pay any taxes. fees. or
charges to the state by reason of this or
any other section of the statutes now in
force or hereafter enacted unless the same
shall, by specific reference to this section,
expressly include such company.
Section 2. Subsection / of section 1915
of the statutes is amended to read: Sec
ton 1876 1. No person, officer. broker,
agent or sub-agent of any insurance cor
poration of any kind required to pay =
any tax or license fee TO the state shall
act or aid in any manner in transacting
the business of or with such corporation in
placing risks or in collecting any premiums
or assessments or effecting insurance there
in, without first procuring from the insur-
ance corporation a certificate of authority !;
shall any such person, officer, broker,
agent, or sub-agent after such certificate
shall have expired, after revocation by
the commissioner of insurance of such GER
tificate or of the license Of such corporation
and until a new certificate or license shall
have been issued to him. do or perform any
such act for or in behalf of any insurance
corporation.
Approved June g. 1909