davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Mensfield's "likeness."

Richard Mansfield once asked Frank
A. Nankivell to make picture Of him.
The actor explained that he wanted
an imitation Of an old Roman coin
with his own profile shown instead Of
Caesars.
do you want an absolute likeness,
or shall idealize it a bit?'' asked Nan
kivell.
Il want an absolute likeness" re-
piled Mr.. Mansfield stiff1y, and the
artist made a sketch of his patron.
When the completed picture-a splen-
did piece Of work that looks as If it
were embossed-was shown to Mr..
Mansfield he was not pleased.
1T looks like prizefghter," said
Mr.. Mansfield
THAT is not my fault" said Nanki-
veil. You know that you said you
| wanted likeness"
There was further exchange Of
courtesies, and then Mansfield sug-
gested that the artist try again. "Ex-
cuse me-" said Nankivell. "Once will
do me-"
"Well, change this picture a little" ,"
said the actor. perhaps you can Ak
it up"
"Not a fix" said the artist as be
rolled up the picture and prepared to
go with a parting shot. You don't
want an artist to draw your picture;
you want a lithographer. Good day"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Or;oin of tho Oath,

Among the different nations the
mode of administering the oath varies.
Formerly the custom was in this coun-
try by kissing the Bible. At the pres
ent time the more general manner Is
by raising the right hand.
Among the many things for which
the world Is indebted to the Jew Is the
mode Of administering the oath. 1t
dates back to the days Of Abram. the
patriarch, who when offered by the
king Of Sodom to take the goods to
himself made answer, II have lift up
mine hand unto the Lord, the most
high God, the possessor Of heaven and
earth, that I will not take from a
thread even to a shoe latchet and that
| will not take anything that Is thine
lest thou shouldst say. have made
Abram rich."-Detroit News-Tribune.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
To Cure Wrinkles.

"Look at paralytic if you think
wrinkles incurable," said beauty doc
tor. "On the side he is paralyzed all
his wrinkles disappear. Though he be
sixty or seventy, his profile on that
side is the profile Of a youth. So the
paralytic shows us how to cure our
wrinkles-namely, by keeping our IA
cial muscles still. If we keep our faces
in perfect repose, never laughing when
the comedian sings his best song, new
er weeping when wife or sweetheart
dies. we will have no wrinkles what
ever The skin wouldn't wrinkle If it
were not exposed. The skin of the
body is much disturbed by action Of
the muscles underneath-as at the
knee, for instance-yet this unexposed
skin never wrinkles. Not being ex-
posed to the bad influence of sun and
wind, it has not lost the oil and the
elasticity Of childhood. And that's
where come in with my creams and
unguents and messages" New Or
leans Times-Democrat.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Tamina Patti.

Patti was to sing on a certain date
at Bucharest. but at the last moment
she declined to leave Vienna. 1t was
too cold; snow everywhere; she would
not risk catching her death Of cold.
NJ. Schurmann, the impresario. was in
despair until brilliant inspiration
came to him. Quickly he telegraphed
to the advance agent in the Rouma-
MAN capital: "At whatever cost Patti
must receive an ovation at Bucharest
station from the Italian aristocracy
Send me by return the following wire:
The members Of the Italian and Rou-
manian nobility are preparing to give
Nine Patti magnificent reception.
The ministry will be represented. Pro-
cessions, torches and bands. Tele-
graph the hour Of arrival" The ad-
vance agent carried out this instruc-
tion, and when the telegram dictated
to him over the wires arrived in VI
emma it was handed to Patti, with the
desired effect. How charming" she
murmured "What time do we start?"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
No Apologies.


Uncle Jerry PEBBLES, who had taken
seat in the smoking car, had filled
his pipe and was about to hunt in his
coat pocket for a match when large
man of much equatorial diameter sat
down in the vacant seat by his side,
complacently crushing him against the
side of the car and almost obliterating
him.
Uncle Jerry said nothing and pro-
ceeded in his search for match. 1t
was hard work to get his hand down
between himself and the large man.
but he found the pocket at last and
took out three or four matches, all OF
which went out as he struck them, one
after the other, except the last.
you're welcome" said the portly
man, glancing down at him over his
shoulder.
"Was that your pocket l had my
hand in?'
1T was"
"Well," said Uncle Jerry as he light
ed his pipe, "all I've pun got to say
puff, puff is that you buy burned poor
matches. es."-Chicago Tribune.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
A Reasonable Excuse.

Bridget" said Mrs. Subbubs stern
~, breakfast is half an hour late
again"
"Yis, mim." returned Bridget meek
~.
What excuse have you to offer?
You know l told you that Mr.. Sub
bulbs must catch that early train, and
punctuality at breakfast is absolutely
necessary" said the lady.
Sure an Oi overshlep' mesilf," said
Bridget.
'That is no excuse" said the mts.
tress. Il gave you an alarm clock
only yesterday"
"Oi know that, mim."
did you wind 1t upy'
"Oi did"
"And didn't it go OFF,"
"Sure an it did that. 1t made tar
rible Mise"
"Then why didn't you get up?"
"Sure, mim," responded Bridget tear
fully, ut was that ting that's made
all the throuble. Oh niver shlep' q
wink all night waitin' for 1t to go on
an whin it did OF was that toired O.
couldn't move."-Harper's Weekly.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
A Wedding Decoration.

Whether it was q mistake or joke
or simply an example of bad taste is
question that is still puzzling most
Of the passengers. But no matter
about that. 1t certainly was a floral
masterpiece. Full four feet it stood
from the ground, in the form Of a
cross. Roses white and roses red
composed the body Of the cross, and
dainty white blossoms and green
leaves formed the trimmings. In the
center the word Peace" was spelled
out In rOsebuds.
Everybody In the car admired the
offering, and when the boy set il
down on the floor all leaned forward
to examine 1t more closely. At length
one old gentleman stood up and read
justed his glasses in order to get z.
better look at 1t.
That is Il mighty pretty posy
you've sot there he said. WHO.
may ask, is dead?'
The boy siggled.
Nobody ;, know of" lie said.
This amt for funeral: it's for a
| wedding"
The old gentleman sat down heav-
lily.
Good Lord-' he said. ''What idiot
ever ordered Peace inscribed on Il
wedding decoration"
The rest of the passengers smiled,
and many of them, being married.
uopdorad nc woll h,1t nobody ynntur-
ed an eXplanation.-New York Times.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
His Wonderful Invention.

Australia, as Is well known, Is in
tested with rabbits, most destructive
and multitudinous pest. Not long ago
a man invented the following plan:
You go out into the field from which
the rabbits are to be removed. You
saw down tree, and on the slant Of
the stump you paint black spot.
Then you keep very quiet, so that the
rabbits will come back from their bur
rows and feed as usual. When a
large enough number has collected you
clap your hands sharply. The effect
will be electric The rabbits will jump
in haste for their burrows. At least
one is sure to mistake the black spot
for his hole and make for it. lnvaria-
bly, he will dash his brains out. This
process. repeated often enough, Is
warranted to exterminate the rabbit
forever.
The reports do not say whether
there are any rabbits left in Australia.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
AustrsIia's First 1hcater.

The first recorded production of a
play in Australia took place in June
Of the year 1889. 1t was called 'The
Recruiting Officer" The proceeds Of
the first pay night (somc f20) went to
the family Of n man who had been
drowned In January, 179G, Il rough
and ready playhouse was opened. and
the public had to pay a shilling
head for admission. The payments
were made in kind. wheat, flour or
rum taking the place Of tie usual cur.
rency.-London Standard.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Twin Place.

One day an old gentleman who
found the Java village at the Worlds
fair very absorbing at length confided
in young man standing near. ITS
powerful nice to watch" he said, but
| may say should be better ont If
was trifie better posted My jogra-
phys leetle rusty, and it's truth and
fact that don't jestly know where
lava is. Now, where is ft?'
ooh" said the young man. with the
assured quiet of one who knows, "just
a little way from char'-Argonaut.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Makino II Easier.

Little Jeans dolly had met with an
accident, and her mother had procured
a new head for 1t. The removal OF
the old head proved to be a rather
difficult task. which Jean watched
with great interest.
'I'm afraid, Jean, / can't get this
old head off," said the mother.
Jeans face glowed with the light OF
an inspiration as she said:
"Never mind. mamma: just take the
body Off"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Sardou'e Opinion Of Women

have, said Sardou, the highest opin-
ion of the fair sex. consider women
superior to men In almost everything.
They possess the intuitive faculty to
an extraordinary degree and may al
most always be trusted to do the right
thing in the right place. They are full
Of noble instincts and. though heavily
handicapped by fate, come well out Of
every ordeal You have but to turn to
history to realize the truth OF what
SAY
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Getting His Straight.

Il wouldn't make confidante OF
May" said the conceited fellow, with
a self satisfied smirk. ''She told me
you said you We're crazy to marry me-
OF course she's no friend if
NO" interrupted Miss Wise, land
she's not even good reporter. didn't
say | was but would be- '"-Catho'
lie Standard and Times.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Al the Market.

Mrs. Good morning. Bridget.
hope your master and mistress have
not forgotten that they're coming to
dine with me tonight. Cook-lndade
and they've not They've ordered a
good, hearty meal at home at 9 o'clock.
-Harper's Bazaar.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Qxerioyed.

How did papa act when you asked
him for my hand?'
II could see that he was trying to
control himself, but he presented all
the symptoms Of a man who has
drawn straight flush" Houston
Post
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
Short Doos Bite Low.

Passerby-Here, boy, your dog has
bitten me on the ankle. Dog Owner
Well. that's as high as he could reach.
You wouldn't expect little pup Ike
him to bite yer neck, would yer-
London Tit-Bits,
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
To the Point.

Elderly Aunt suppose you wonder
ed, dear little Hans. why left you so
abruptly in the lane. ] saw a man.
and. oh. how | rant Hans-Did yo1
get himAFliegende Blatter
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
A Teaser.

There is one subject on which 1t Is
difficult to keep up interest|
''What particular subject is that on
which 1t is difficult to keep up inter
est?'
"fhe mortgage OK my house"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
The Store That Saves You Money
No Acid Needed.

Weary William Rhoades-Say, Hap
py, wot's de difference between us an
new fail cider?
Happy Harry-Search me.
Weary William Rhoades-Dey don't
have ter put no acid in us ter keep us
frum workin'"
At which the dry hay in the NOV
burst into a furious flame.-Exchange
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
A Woman's Secret.

Biggs-There goes !; woman with a
past. Boggs-Yes. and there are about
twenty years more Of it than she Is
willing to own up to.-New York Jour-
hal
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29

Great is the fact that our interests
gradually take Il wider scope. allowing
more s'ope for the healing power of
ensation.-Dinah Mulock Craik.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29

who hangs himself In the chimney
should not complain OF smoke.-Ger'
man Proverb.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29
NoiseIess.

Wife-Would it please you. dear, II l
learned another language? Husband
Yes. it would delight me infinitely
Wife-Well. which one shall I study? !?
Husband-The sign language.-Smart
Eoi
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1909-04-29

A man that is young In years may
be old in hours If he has lost no time
Bacon
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
PILGRIM News Items.

Mr., Lucius Inabinet and Miss Mat
tie Inabinet, of Orangeburg, who
have been visiting relatives in this
section, returned home on Monday:
Miss Agnes Wilson, of Columbia.
who has been spending several days
with relatives, returned home Tues
day. >.
Miss Ruth Wilson, of Columbia,
spent several days with her cousins,
Misses Ernestine and Gussie Hegg-
man.
Master Alison Wilson returned to
Columbia yesterday, after spending
several weeks with his cousin, Master
John Frederick Heggman.
Mrs. Mary Ruff and little son, of Sa-
luda, returned home Saturday, after
spending week at Mr.. Otto Hegg-
mans.
Miss Maude Bouknight, of Ballen-
tine, returned home Sunday, after
spending week with relatives.
Mr.. David Bouknight, of Ballentine,
attended Justus Vineyards cue on
Saturday.
Mr.. Lucius Inabinet, who has been
quite sick with fever. is able to be out
again under the skillful treatment OF
DR.. J. J. Wingard.
Mrs. Nancy Wingard, who has been
sick for several weeks is better:
Brown Eyes.
Aug. 16.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
The Caldwell Hotel.

The Caldwell Hotel, under the man
agement of Mr.. George J. Howell, is
becoming the most popular hotel in
Columbia. The travelling men are be-
coming more and more attached to
The Caldwell, not because the rates
are reasonable, but because there is
no better Accommodations to be found
anywhere. The people of Lexington
will always find The Caldwell an ideal
place to spend the night or secure a
meal. Centrally located in the busi'
ness section of the city, it is the most
convenient hotel in the city.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
Around the Mill Village.

Mrs. G. S. O'Neill and Miss Sallie
Burton, of Batesburg, were in attend
ance upon the meeting of the "o-
mans Missionary convention on Sat-
urday.
Little Sadie Mae Redd is improving
slowly and we hope she will soon be
entirely recovered.
Miss Oracle Powell, who has had
fever for the last week, is able to sit
up again.
Mr.. and Mrs. Frank Barrett spent
Sunday in Columbia.
Miss Matte Barrett has returned
from pleasant visit to relatives in
the Dutch Fork.
Several young men went to Colum-
bia on Sunday evening in Mr.. Rich
ardson's automobile.
Mr.. J. M. Clemmons, who has been
confined to his room for two weeks
is again able to be at his work.
Mr.. Jesse Poole and Miss Della
Berry, of the mill village, were mar
ried on Sunday by T. E. Rawl, notary
public, at Irene.
Mr.. J. Arthur Harman spent Sunday
at Batesburg.
Miss Tarsy Gable entertained a num-
ber of relatives and friends at birth
day'dinne1 on Sunday.
Mrs. J. A. Harman, who has been
visiting her mother at Freedonla, has
gone to Seivern to visit the family OF
Mr., Joe F. Harman.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
Swansea n otes.

Miss Ellen Haigler Was "At Home"
F-iday evening to her friends from
$40 TO II 80 o'clock at the residence
of her brother, Mr.. J. L. Haigler.
Miss Haigler proved herself charm,
ing hostess and her "SWap, Par1y"
was one of the most enjoyable occa-
sions of the summer. Before the time
for departing the guests were invited
into the beautifully decorated dlnlng
room where a delicious ice course
was served.
Col. r. B. Watson, of Ridge Spring,
delivered q lecture on prohibition IN
the Baptist church Sunday evening.
The excellent lecture was heard by q
large audience and much appreciated
by the people here. . -
Miss Sally Courtney and Mr.. w. y:
Courtney have returned from ylslt
to their sister, Mrs. Harry Hydrlck,
near Perry.
Miss Minnie Johnson left Monday
for an extended stay in Savannah, Ga.'
and River Junction, Fla.
Miss Helen Wannamaker spent last
week With her brother, Mr.. M. l..
Wannamaker. ,..,
Mrs. 6. o. Shepherd and little
daughter, Mildred, have gone for a
visit to relatives in Georgia.
Miss Lille Rucker, of Sandy Run,
is visiting in town.
Miss Eula Lee Quattlebaum has re-
turned to her home in Williston after
a week with Mrs. A. D. Bowling.
MIR. and Mrs. B. E. Craft are al
home. after q visit to relatives in Or.
angeburg and Calhoun. .
Mr.. F. L. Witt, of North, is in town
for a few days. :,
Mr.. and Mrs. Presley lnablnet
from the Limestone section, are WITH
Mrs. G. B. Bowling. Anon.
Swansea, Ang, 16.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
At The Grand.

The performances at The Grand
theatre in Columbia during the last
couple weeks have pleased every one
who has attended. The attractions
this week are up to the usual high
standard-all entirely new features.
The Musical Jeralds performs many
wonderful acts. A unique number on
their program is the playing of thirty
two banios at the same time. There
are many other features, and the
show is worth many times the price
of admission, which is ten cents.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
TOWN REGISTRATION.

The Books of Registration for the
Town Of Lexington. S. c., will be
open at the store of 81. N. Hammer
& Co., from August %, 1909 to Oct.
80, 1909. when the books will close,
prior to the November election for
town officers, of which due notice will
be given.
\ III N KAMINER.
Recorder and Supervisor,
For Town of Lexington, 8. G.
Aug. 16, 19O9-td.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
justus Wineard's Cue.

Justus Vineyards barbecue, about
three miles from Lexington on Satur-
day, was one of the largest attended
of the season. In spite of the fact that
Mr.. wingard had made extra prepara-
tions to accommodate the crowd, many
had to go away without dinner. Mr.:
Wingard has Interpolation of furnish
ing excellent prepared meats. and his
'c1es each year are growing more pop
ular.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
The Missionary Meeting.

The Woman's Missionary society Of
the Baptist church held here on Sat
urday and Sunday was very largely
attended. On Sunday an able sermon
was presched by the Rev. N. N. Burt
on, pastor of the church in this place.
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
Rev. Neeley W eds
this Afternoon.

This afternoon at 5 o'clock in the
Washington Street Methodist church.
Columbia, the Rev. John w: Neeley,
of Lexington, will be married to Miss
Ella Cornelia Moye, Of this county.
Many will be the congratulations
shoWered upon the happy couple
The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1909-08-18
index to New Advertisements.
the PALMETTO COLLEGIATE
INSTITUTE
will Open on September s.

I All students should enter on the first
.day. First class work is done here.
The two scholarships to Clemson were
won by students OF this school: Anum-
her of students and graduates have Sc
cured first grade teachers certificates
by standing the examination. Here IS
the place get good preparatory train
ing. Anyone who wishes catalogue
should write to the principal,
: U. E. BLACK, Lexington, 5. c.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1909-02-12
PERSONAL MENTION

George Harris Of Portland was In
the city yesterday and q guest at the
Occideni,
W. X. Hamilton Of Portland spcat
the afternoon in this city yesterday
w. + Kenney has returned from
d three months sojourn ID cahior.
MIA, and reports that he was much
pleased with things as he found them
there and win probably return there
later In the year
Dr. Fred Peacock returned to his
home in Cathlamet on the train last
evening.
James Manary, representing the
Oregon Timber & Lumber Com
pany, was in the city yesterday from
the Clifton country, and returned up
river last evening,
G, A, Morrison, travelling freight
agent for the Canadian PACING, was
q business visitor here yesterday.
Wiliord Curtis has returned from
Alaska and is enjoying life at the
family home He has many friends
here who will be glad 10 greet him
again.
J. B, F'earon Of New York spent
the day in this city yesterday on
business quest.
Miss Nancy G. Reed, the compe-
tent and affable clerk at the general
delivery window OF the Astoria post
office, Is off on Today leave Of
absence.
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1909-02-12
ADJUSTMENTS
THE TANNING OF THE sHREw"

The present tour al Charles b.
Haniord promises 10 be OF exeep-
iional interest for in his field Of ar
nstic expression he stands practically
alone as an exponent Of the greatest
plays in English literature - the
Shakcspearean drama. His annual
visits invariably inspire the keenest
interest among all classes OF play
goers, and il is the aim Of his manag-
ment, by careful selection OF plays
to maintain and, II possible, excel the
high standards Of excellence attained
by this popular player, While it has
been customary for most actors to
confne themselves to one production
yearly, Mr., Hanford has displayed
prodigious industry and noble gene
rosity, mounting every piece in his
repertory with the strictest attention
to detail and with the utmost luxury
of investiture warranted. Schooled
with the greatest masters of his art,
he has profted by the instruction, and
stands today as one OF the really
great opponents of the classic drama.
The reapppearance OF Miss Marie
Drofnah will give added interest to
Mr.. Hanford's productions this sea
son, After a years absence from the
stage, Miss Drofnah returns to the
position she has so ably filled for
many years, and in which she has
earned the highest honors as a de-
lineator of Shakespeare's heroines,
On the occasion Of Mr., Hanford's en-
gagement at the Astoria Theatre on
Wednesday, February II, he will ap-
pear in an elaborate production of
"The Tanning of the Shrew."
The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1909-02-12
.RAMBLER'S SREMARKSON
CURRENT MATTERS
OBSERVATIONS or ONE WHO
THINKS AND THEN WRITES
AS HE FINDS THINGS.

The following pungent remarks
were sent to Us by we'll known citi-
zen, who Is generally listened 10 when
he talks and who is quite as inter
esting when he writes:
Astoria, Feb. 8, 1909.
Editor Astorian:
"Our police commission is very ap.
prehensive lest, il il order the police
Of the city to enforce the laws
against gambling, while the police
are peeking through key-holes Or
over transoms, graver crimes will
be committed throughout the city.
Tom Linville, while sheriff, stopped
the gambling, single handed, while
performing the other duties Of sher-
iff, and without peeking through key
holes or over transoms. II Is un-
necessary to reason further"