New-York tribune., 1909-07-28
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Kansas railroad commission has discovered ina.
the law against drinking strong waters on rairoao
trains is more honored in the breach thah N tie
Observance, and has set out 10 enforce II risuIS
The law makes Il a crime for any person 10 uIl''h
Intoxicating liquors in streetcar or railway pas
senger car while the is being used TOT the
TRANSFORMATION Of passengers. The penalty Is a me
Of 500 or a thirty-day Jail sentence or both. Ihe
railroad commissioners have ordered that printed
copy Of the statute be posted conspicuously IT
every public passenger conveyance
The teacher was giving geography Lesson @ and and
dor and from Thessaly to Timbnctoo was tnorougn i
Como to c;ern,anv that Important country governed
by the Kaiser Tommy Jones, what Is a haiser
please m" yawned Tommy Jones. "a stream
O. hot water springin' up an disturbin the earth.
London Skit.
The gondoIa the symbol of the City Of the Doses
says Venice letter in the 'Leipziger Zeltuns
was the subject Of a serious discussion in the
Venice City Council recently. THE inventions OF
the day" said one OF the officials, will eventually
drive our Eondolas out OF the Venetian waters ano
in their stead We will have steamboats, and motor
boats" This fear pronounced without good
cause by another member, who replied that there
are stn s25 gondolas in Of which $50 belonged
to private individuals. The topography Of tht
city he said positively precludes the extinction
OF the gondola because tine narrower canals can
be nayiEated only by them. At ebb tide there is
not water enough in many Of the canals to float
the modern water craft and while the gondola
may some day become decoration only on the
oity's chief arteries it will remain a necessity on
12a canals where power boats cannot travel
Tell me- said the loveIorn youth. what's the
best way 20 ind out what woman thinks OF
Marry hers" replied Peckham prompty.-Cath-
Ollie Standard and Times.
As a memorial TO his son Oscar. who died re-
Gently. Baron Albert de RothschId. OF Vienna,
gave 10 the Jewish community Of that city 1000
he 1sf7fc NAL n
ment. the amounts 10 be applied to charitable
work. He gave also 20o.ooo kronen for educational
purposes. in the departments OF mathematics and
astronomy. saying IN the memorandum which ac-
companed the amount that these branches had
heen selected because the late oscar de Rothschild
had always taken deep interest in them
MANS SUIT CASE.
She packed my suit case up last night
And then she packed her own
And when the customs man stopped me,
What in my stored away
answered: Just my clothes,
He winked at me- then said: "Tl look:
It's all right. 1 suppose
Forth from my suit case then he drew
-Four shrtwaists and a fan;
Two summer dresses and skirt,
SILK stockings black and tan;
viii not cali 20 mind;
Of mi mine T that til he S''t5 Could and
Il thought YOU said your clothes were here"
ri let my my wife M explain this thing"
| said. now II she can
Those things | must have she replied
There wasn't room. indeed,
For everything and so left
Out what you wouldn't need"
oh, married man. when with your wife
You're going on trip,
Stand over her and watch when
She's packing up your grip.
or you will find. to your dismay,
when you go to unpack II
That where you thought your nightie was
Detroit Free Press.
High places in the English navy not the only
rewards for who polish up the handle OF the
big front door" Otto Reinhardt Pepper has been
engaged in this work i'm Berlin for many years
but has found time TO write several plays. one OF
which was recently performed and favorably
ceived. Encouraged by his success. the porter and
brass polsher has written another comedy. entitled
The Unrghteous." in which he had a
Iaborer mechanic. Will Klabund by name. The
humble dramatist recently asked whether he
would resign his porters position If his latest and,
to his mind, his best work should receive the ap-
proval the public He said mo. Writing is
only pastime. while brass cleaning is my bust
ness. l think man should give mp work for
play"
when you feels hankerin' foh great authority,
SON. said Uncle Eben. do little preliminary
practisin' a baseball umpire an whether
you really enjoys it'-Washington Star.