Gunnison news-champion., 1909-04-23
'.r '.n TIE nsM
tus hoss OF why Ne
Co-sid Not Captain


hs~.rs bad hezan ta make remarks
about fh. p.-oHi. ~ho ~oulan keep
tseir co~s a. hoaae i,'siare therc Was
aHy getaway racket from the cnes-
cnoo. fiaf if : ~oadsF the train iefr
o all There ~as . great man 81 the
station thai pizht and the train ~ss
Acld Tor him though h. ssau I taAe h
after all This was the ~sy 81 d.
on that particular evening a local
Ouch siac. the y &. e got the lcgis
ative hypodernic. ~.ni down to the
S;ztien to meet has home bound spouse
shod becn doing some family v,Si;
snE up near Smokexilie. Her tram Uss
due at ~. bar his watch ~a< dszzy
end he landed a; the main gate an
esss hall hour ahead M time.
Leave me hsraie the barrier" ~
suggested mildly TO the blue back os
ehe fat gsteMan. My wife is coming
home. aud I want to wait bys the par
aliels and zive her the grand clutch
~ soon a. she slighis from Mrs.
Puiimans little wagon"
Nope. replied the fat gateman
without turning around Its against
the rules
But suggested the newspaper
man not 50 mild'y I've got a Do
tion m going ogt there. and"
But he didn't have time TO finish.
for the gateman fxed his face foi
real crushing iook ard swung
around A second later that gate
mans best friends wouldn't have
known him. lie Rut rcd in the face.
then white. then red again. lifted his
I'D. bowed and swung the gate open
So fast lis hnses smoked. rcmarking.
with sickly grin You will have
your little iale. sir"
The newspaper man drifted through
In a hazy dream effect. and began
walking Gp and down the platform.
wondering whether he wouldn't better
g. back and hand the fat gatcmsn
one ON the nose for HIS real fresh.
funny actions Hut he noticed that
tha sateman had called some more
Uniforms to his side aud that the
bunch had their heads together. think.
Ing In whispers and looking in his
direction
The newspaper man began 10 set
worried, He looked himself over. dis.
covered that he was wearing his
shoes, that he hadn't forgotten his
shirt and that there were 70 signs
hanging around lis person. And he
haa just about decided TO register a
diagnosis of congoutal lunacy against
the crowd when one OF the uniforms
Sobbled toward him
is there anything can do for
you he inquired.
The newspaper man, pretty well
convinced that somebody was trying
20 get gay with him. scowled fero-
riously. Not thing" he replied.
erouchily, whereupon the official said
Thank YOU. sir" and went away look
Ing as happy as Boston broker on Q
copper holiday.
About a minute later a portly per
con in uniform steamed up. nodded re.
spectfully and touched his hat.
No. is pretty nearly on time, sir"
ne remarked.
Telephone that up to the once"
said the newspaper man, shortly. Its
worth an extra edition any day"
And at that particular moment he
began to feel light in the head. For
the effect of that little pleasantly on
the station master was something
fearful to behold. lie curled up and
laughed and uncurled and laughed
some more. And after he was all
through laughing he went trotting
around the station telling that re-
mark TO all the uniforms in sight.
and the train shed was certainly a real
hilarious place for awhile.
But five rlinutes later the uniform
ed person steamed back, looking pes
tered in the head. and did another
iowiy approach.
Beg pardon, sir" he said. but
when ! saw you come in wired down.
and there's a drawing room on six be-
Ing saved for you"
That's mighty thoughtful" re-
piled the newspaper man. and the
person did another departure. purring
as contentedly as Maltese cat.
Then No. steamed in, and for the
next 20 or % minutes the newspaper
man got dippier every second. Ever
attache of the station had their lamps
glued on him all the time. and he be-
gan to feel as prominent as ]. Diggum
Rockefeller and John Alexander Dowie
rolled into one. But the air was fun
Of tension. Seventeen people in uni
form stood around looking as if they'd
Ike 10 suggest something If they
dared, and finally one of them drifted
up looking trembly about the chin.
and gave a preliminary cough:
Beg pardon. sir. excuse me for
mentioning il. and I'm sorry to dis
turb you. ne said at length. but
we've held No. 6 20 minutes for Won
AID if you could come now. sir. We"
Il guess | won't go tonight said