davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
CARNEGIE AS TEACHER.
Works Of Some Old Jokes on Kaiser
 Wilhelm.


 Berlin, Nov. 6.-(Special.)- .)-Mr. Carnegie has been teaching the flaDer what he ought to be doing, and teaching him, too. by parable.
 It will be remembered that the Scot tish-A merican millionaire was a guest of the Kaiser recently, and he has been tell ing Bertha suttner, the well-known down. with -the-riies enthusiast, a little about the conversations he had with the Kaiser.
 The Kaiser was in the best of tempers and could take a good joke in good part, even when it was against himself
 You're democratic American, aren't your said the Kaiser. Well, then l suppose you ought not to hove a good word to say for Kaisers and Kings"
 "Oh," said Carnegie, unabashed. that depends on the personality of the par ticular functionary. Anyway you want to cross over to America yourself once, Your reception would be enthusiastic"
 The Kaiser replied that a trip across the water would interest him very much, but he couldn't go so far or be away so long, '"They want mo over here
 well, Your Majesty, I should just like to tell you a little story about that, if you won't be annoyed
 Fire away"
 Well, over in our country, there was a pretty big manufacturer who worried himself to death over his business. saw to every tiniest detail himself, and so forth At last his director got around the old man and persuaded him he'd got to get right away from business for time, for his health's sake.
 '"The manufacturer accordingly went, and when he'd thoroughly rested came back looking like a new man. Next day he met the director and said to him; .say, you can't guess what relief felt
 IL all Yes, 1 can guess retorted the di- rector, because we all felt the same.'"
 Tho Kainer laughed heartily at tho an- ecdote and by and by Carnegie got off another hoary one out of the same pack et The Kaiser and Carnegie were talk ing about universal peace. Carnegie reckoned it was up to the Kaiser to hurry along the earthly paradise some.
 well, yes," said the Kaiser. "I have always been promoter of peace myself. only, not quite on your method"
 Aha" quoth Carnegie, but it's the method that matters. I want to tell you another little parable.
 "A pair-horse landau was being driven along the road. tandem passed 1t, travelling a furious pace and making a duce of dust. A little later the driver of the pair met the driver of the tandem and asked him yhat he meant by travel ing such pace and frightening people like that
 "T wasn't doing any harm said the tandem-driver. had only hitched on two horses, same as yourself, only by little different method
 'The driver of the pair scratched his poll minute and then said, Yes, but it's the method that makes all the diff ference"
 Bertha Suttner says the Kaiser was ticlsled to death over this anecdote. But what the Kaiser was laughing at was the idea of Carnegie working off an old one like that on him.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
Personal and General.

The Central School Improvement asso- citation will meet at the Bush school build ing on Avenue G and Twenty-third street woman interested in education Is invited to be present and enjoy g social hour with the teachers.
 The tacky party given by tho Christian Endeavor society at the home of Prof 0. P. Bowman at Palmer Terrace, Friday night was great suocess in every par ticular The crowd was large and some very amusing masks wore worn. The first prize for men went to Mir. Wahl and for ladies to Miss Marstellar.
 Enslsy Post No. 1911. United National Anuoolataoa oe Pesto1liee Qerira, held an impestnnk baG1nnsB OoGn11a nsb1a6 ovsn-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
DEAFNESS CURED
By New Discovery
''I have de. mons trate q that deafness can be cured.' pr. Guy ClM- ford Powell.

The secret of how to use the mys- terious and invisible nature forces for the cure of Deafness and Head Noises has at last been discovered by the famous Physician-Scentist pr. Guy Clifford Powell. Deafness and Head Noises disappear as if by magic under the use of this new and wonderful dis cevery. Ho will send all who suffer from Deafness and Head Noises full in- formation how they can be cured, ab- solutely free, no matter how long they have been deaf or what caused heir deafness This marvellous Treat ment is so simple, natural and certain that you will wonder why it was not diacovered before. Investigators are astonished and cured patients them selves marvel At the quick results. Any deaf person can have full information how to be cured quickly and cured 0 stay cured at home without Investing a cent. Write today to pr. Guy Cliff ford Powell, 6606 Bank Bldg.. Peoria, ILL. and get full information of this new and wonderful discovery. abso- &AkA1W 1rAA-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
TRADE IN TOYS.
Millions of DoIIars Worth Imported
 Every Year.

From The Independent.
 Over lso.ooooo0 worth of toys have been imported into the United States during the last 10 years, During the same period something like s5,0oo.00o worth of toys wsrs exported.
 During the last fiscal year the high water mark has been reached in so far as export trade in toys Is concerned. The total value of exported toys during that time has for the first time exceeded N,- co.,
 The value of toys imported has fallen mswhat since 1908. when the total value of imported toys was s7.2do,oO0 This year the hfures were tk0o0.oo0 in round num- bers.
 Toy manufacturers in the United States had investments in plants and in stock of less than $1.ooo.oo0 in 1aSo Tn 1sos such investments had grown to s4Boooa Tho value of importations of toy msrohan- disc has in the meantime shown . con- stAntly increasing trend. Trade in toys has largely been developed during the last 10 or 3 years.
 Toys arc very largely made in Ger many" That is to say. Germany Is by far tho largest source of supply in the United States. The little German town of Sonne- berg, in the Duchy of saxs-Msininsen- f1uoDur6n nAu5chs oL the Hothcn, lb per- haps the largest toy manufacturing ssn- ter. In addition to Its summer resort busi- ness 1t hes bean credited with the annual production of some N.ooc.oo toy units having an aggrsgats value of N.oee.- eee.
 NuFanbsrg and certain other sister cities arc also to be reckoned with as toy makers, The value of toys imported Into the United States from Germany in 1908 VI q Q Imported that year. Some of the other toy~contrfbuting countries in 1908 fur nished toys valued as fellewsi Trance, t1so,<13, Austria-Hunsary, $17s, ,<7; Japan, SIT, I'D; Balgium, $s1, ,5N, and the United Kingdom. tsl. 1H
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
Admission 5 Gents.

look on 1t as anything but joke. The memorial was finally referred, and the committee on naval affairs, and the Hartford Courant thus refers to it.:
 We have not found any further mention of John Wise in the Congress sional Globe. Presumably the naval committee pigeon-holed his memorial and never gave 1t another thought But what's the matter with the Wrights and the other young air navi- gators giving a thought, and kindly one, to this intrepid forerunner tor forefiier) of theirs, who was hopefully at the doors of Congress for his little $20 900 appropriation before they were born, and who was last seen alive in the car of balloon that never came back? It's fate-and John Wise'e-is one of Lake Michigan's seorets.s
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
Lodoe MeetInus.

The Elks will hold a regular meeting Monday evening which every member is expected to attend. as there are matters of importance to como before the lodge The general committee on tbe annual min gtrel performance will make a prelirni- nary report and other important matters will bs dealt with. The meeting will bs called to order at o'clock
 Steel City lodGe will hold social ses- sion on Tuesday evening after the regular ordsr of business has been transacted. A feature will be the presentation of past chancellors jewels to past presiding offi- cers. Refreshments will be served and . very pleasant evening is promised to those who attend
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
Much Building In Enslex.

There Is considers ble activity in build- ing circles in and around Ensley, and many substantial buildings are being erected. Messrs. Ramsay & Mccormack have commsnced the erection of a two story brick building on the alley cor ner between Eighteenth and Nineteenth streets on Avenue B. J. A. Burgin is erecting a handsome two-story residence on Pike avenue. near his old home, at a cost of tn00. w. R. Stewart has just completed two brick stores at Palmer station, one of them now being occupied by the Tuxedo Drug Co., H. L. Hall is building a handsome home on Fair view avenue and many other elegant and substantial buildings arc in progress.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
What Robbie Wanted to Know.

He asked so many questions that day that he finally wore out his mothers patience
 Robert" she cried, If yotl ask me an- other question I shall put you to bed without your supper"
 Robert promptly asked another and was packed off to bed. Later his mother re- pented. After all asking questions was the only way he could acquire know ledge; so she tiptoed upstairs knelt be- side Roberts bed, and told him she was sorry.
 "Now, dear" she said, 'if you want to ask one more question before you go to sleep, ask 1t now and I will try to anNwer."
 Robert thought for moment, then said. Mother, how far can a cat spit ?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
Broken In Tlms.

Broken In Tlme. From Pick-Ms-Up. ing his willf Dusll-Yess long ssfers he 1,se.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-11-07
And StIlI They spar

From Puck
 Miss CutterGHer dress fits her like . glove.
 Miss snippez-Yes, like boxing glove.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
Looker-On In Iona

Garwin. Nov. o.-The man with the
secret liquid preparation for cleaning
out vaults, cesspools, ETC., has recently
been working here. There is no doubt
but what he has a preparation which
does the work He merely empties the
contents of an eight ounce bottle into
the vault or cesspool and in a few
hours all of the obnoxious contents
have disappeared, dissolved int gases
and carried away by the air currents.
One business man here says he paid
him 81 and has much better job than
when performed the ordinary way. 1t
is also true that the owner of this Sc
cret preparation has been offered big
sums for the secret. To avoid any one
getting on" he buys part of his drugs
in different places and at night care
fully guards any stock he has on hand.
He says he was offered 100000 to
form stock company in Waterloo, but
what's the use, he can make $40 a day
working only two hours canvassing and
emptying his little bottle. 1t looks now
as tho his secret would be lost to the
world when he dies, for no amount of
money or argument will induce him to
give up the formula Of his prepare
! ton. Meanwhile if all towns where he
works were strictly prohibition, theS
would receive the same condemnation
he gave this town for being so dry,
On the railroad platform at Montou
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
THE FARM AND THE RURAL ACADEMIES,

AT Des Moines yesterday school cor
solsdation and the establishment of
rural academies We're urged upon the
state teachers association by its presi-
dent as effective measures for keeping
boys upon the farms. President Beard
advanced this idea, not a new one by
any means, and suggested that the
rural academy or high school would if
established, counteract the drawing in
fuence of the smaller colleges.
President Beard will find many
agreeing with him upon the advisable
ity Of school consolidation and the
creation of a. rural school of more pre-
tension than township consolidation is
able to maintain. However. it is not so
clear that the rural school is to any
great degree responsible for the city
ward trend of country population or
that better schools would overcome the
tendency. The fact is that not the
best educated and most intelligent OF
the farm population crowd to the cities
On the contrary. And it is true thai
the rush has been stayed and that the
! farm looks good today to the brightes
4 farmer boys. The fact is that con-
yersation with the boy who drives il
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05

Cummins on the subject of tariff"
The telephone has come to be one
of the most important public service
enterprises in the country and it will
continue to be such. Let's get it reg
ulated at once" suggests the Algona
Republican. The companies them
selves will appreciate it after it has
been done
IF President Taft has not secured a
better understanding of what the west
wants in the way of tariff revision his
| trip around the circle has been in vain
and he will return to the White House
no wiser as to the country,s demands
and needs than when he left it six
weeks ago." says the Parkersburg
Eclipse. The west is not for free
trade. Even the thoughtful democrats
are against a proposition of this kind.
The west wants an honest revision of
the tariff and will keep on insisting
that the republican party's pledges be
carried out in this respect. Cannon
| buster and Taft's efforts to read the
| insurgents out of the republican party
will have no other effect than to solid
| ify the forces working for honest tariff
revision and more determined effort
to get it."
iowa should get over the habit of
leaning on Wall street and the east for
financial support" admonishes the
| Upton Advertiser. There was reason
for the habit when it was formed. 1t
was q time when money was scarce in
the west and big enterprises could be
undertaken only with money borrowed
i in the east. But the reason no longer
exists A lot of Iowa communities want
interurbans and in most cases we are
told that the plans are hung UP wait
ing on the decision of eastern capital
lists to furnish funds. They may come
in time thru such channels, but they
will come whole lot quicker when
Iowa people show their good faith in
their own state and local enterprises
by investing their own money. There is
enough money now on deposit in east
ern banks to build several interurban
systems"
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
KNOXVILLE DISAPPOINTED.

Speaker Cannon is disappointing.
Just as we We're getting ready to ac-
cord to him the virtue of courage he
shows himself to be a trimmer. He
started out to read the riot act to the
insurgents and drive them out of the
party That seemed to be a pretty large
job for even car to undertake but
he talked so boldly that it inspired be-
lief in his courage if, not his judgment.
He defied Cumn1ins and .LaFollette in
the Illinois newspapers; damned Fowler
into fame and placed Parsons in the
Ananias club. Then he came to Knox
vile and declared his utmost repsect
for Cummins and Dolliver but roasted
some of the Wisconsin congressman and
insurgents in general to a nice brown
finish. He spoke softly in Knoxville
because he knew that Cummins would
answer him the next day. Later at Ell
gin he renewed the attack on Cunm!ins
but eulogized Congressman James r
Mann, Of Chicago, for exactly the same
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05

from the rural district to attend high
school in town will reveal that he
doesn't see anything better than farm
ing within his outlook and that he in
tends to farm" The yong farm bred
man attending college feels very much
as the boy does. The tide has turned
toward the farm.
What did it? Invention, that relieves
of much of the muscle racking toll of
soil culture; prosperity that makes
farming the ideal business; the tele-
phone that wraps neighborhoods and
counties with the marvel of its wires;
the rural mail delivery that brings the
success that has given the farmer pride
in his business has built the new
house of modern sightliness with mod
ern comforts and luxuries. The farm
attracts as a business proposition, farm
life has changtd and has become at
tractive. The farm boy is no fool He
knows, nowadays. that good farm
beats the average business and pro-
fession.
Let us get this proposition straight.
So far We have been putting the cart
ahead The reason school consolidation
and rural academies are coming is not
as a remedy against present farm con-
ditions but as a result and adjunct CT
these conditions. We shall have good
rural schools by reason of the same
circumstances and conditions that we
have good houses, big barns, thorough
bred hogs. horses and cattle. We need
them and have become able to have
them. They come not as a remedy
against the ills of farm life but as par.
of the Improvement of farm conditions.
And when they are established the
small college and the big one will draw
more students from them than ever
from the district school.
When Roosevelt appointed commits
sioners to inquire into the onditions of
Iowa farmers smile broke over the
fac of the state. When we advance the
school consolidation as a remedy for
farm conditions the Iowa farmer is
more amused than convinced. School
consolidation is less a sociological ne
cessity than convenience. 1t is sem
sible. economical and certain to come
because it is part of progress, but it is
a follower not a leader of progression
on the farm
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05

Dolliver? II. something highly: attrac-
tive of listening crowds is desired this
suggestion seems to be worth consid-
ering. Everyone would go and Aldrich
be assured Of big audiences.
If johnson should beat Jeffries his
best bet would be to run for president
of Liberia.
Whe nthe suffragette business be-
gins at Des Moines some one should
be willing to finance the campaign for
the moving picture privilege.
About all that the Tammany tiger
saved was its tail and the tail isn't
heavy enough to wag the city.
That republican slump in Massachu-
sets is significant. But what would it
have been in western state?
The new street car corporation in
Des Moines seems to have put the
P. A. Y. E. system in force beginning
" LII Liz Wy SOlllIllSSlOll anu
all agreements.
Now that it is explained the Tom
Johnson was running against a former
Iowa man it is easy to see how it hap
pened to him.
The Hedrick merchant who amused
himself by sending black hand letters
to his neighbors is wondering what
will be handed back to him.
Even the tramp is not to blame He
has fugue dromomania, a disease that
obsesses him with the desire to wan
der. Imagine dromana MAC with a
complication of motor mania.
If the equal suffragists carry out
their promulgated policy we shall not
miss the tariff discussion or long so
much for annual elections. Lack of
excitement will be the least of our
troubles.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
The REPORTERS NEW FIELD,

". T. Stead has contributed much
10 the science of publicity. He is d
great newspaper man. one of the Few
who might perhaps, if they cared 20
do so, lay just claim to the title OF
journalist OF all the has contributed
10 the possibilities of newspaper pub
when he raised" w E. Gladstone thru
a spiritualistic medium and secured a
shorthand interview with that great
and gone statesman which was printed
in the London Daily Chronicle. Mr..
Stead says the interview is verbatim. 1t
is notable, however. that Mr.. Gladstone
in the interview lambastes the house
of lords very much after the fashion
of Mr.. Stead himself.
But if Mr.. Stead is to be credited,
ana the interview was procured as he
asserts see what ne opens up. If
Gladstone's spirit may be interviewed
so may the shades of others. We are
due to read startling revelations when
the ghosts begin to talk
A ghost has no fear of man made law
and penitentiaries built with human
hands; lot of fellows who were afraid
ia talk on earth may be willing to set
history straight thru the medium. Thus
we shall learn the secrets of many well
concealed graft. It is hard to see thru
an oak door when the wad carrier pays
over the price of a paving steal or The
defeat of a just law or the purchase
money OF a man and peoples rights;
but if the reporter can get at someone
who has gone beyond the law, where
all his overt acts are public property
and who has no reputation to lose the
ghost may talk. Imagine the sensation
if the right ghost opened up with {
column of inside history!
In the meantime someone might in
terview Abraham Lincoln on what con.
stitutes republican. get George Wash.
.ington's understanding Of what Taft
pre- election promises meant, and in
1 terview Peter Stuyvesant as regards
! Caynor
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
Topics of. the Times

Il is likely that the coming trip will
be positively Senator Aldrich's last
appearance in the west"
But instead of knocking the blocks
off legislators and breaking windows
why not produce a petition from at
least one third of the women of the
state asking for the franchise? Per-
haps, however, the present plan Of
campaign is more in consonance with
the feminine weakness for a bargain
counter rush.
Just as like as not some of the un-
married suffragettes and bachelor leg
islators will decide to pair on the
question.
Anyway good cook beats three Of
the suffragette kind.
If the suffragettes win, the voting
privilege should be restricted to women
who can darn sock in the presence
of the judges of election.
Say. what do you know about that
| Cook-Peary controversy?
After all the man who plants hill
of corn is bigger force than the
builder of a battleship, and the hired
man who hits the bang board every
time he throws an ear is a better shot
than the most expert gunpointer.
How would it do for Senator Aid
rich to double up on those western
dates of his and divide the time with
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1909-11-05
a@MA14A
cAnFlELp PROTESTS.

If President Taft permitted the en-
blem of the Daughters of the Confed-
eracy to be placed upon his person.
such emblem containing the rebel flag,
surely 1t will add no stars to his
crown. Nor again any loyal votes for
his second election. Does he, Taft, not
remember that sacrifice of one-half
of a million men was made TO stamp
that filthy rag in the dust?
What say you men who wore the
blue from 1861 to 1865?
If Secretary Dickinson has the pic
ture of jeff Davis, the arch traitor), so
printed upon his heart, no wonder his
speech is more or less contaminated
with disloyalty. What say you, loyal
people? JUD CANFIED.