Los Angeles herald., 1909-09-19

"Patt? Piatt? III get him somehow-er what
hep
"Well, he had been many things. lawyer, a
farmer. politician. soldier. and last an editor"
"Ah!' cried th- Bishop sharply, washington! HIS
Il Washington paper. have him now. wit,
Il of most cynical, biting humor."
"Yes," l answered trying hard to keep the culver
out of my voice "rhat was the mask that hid a
knightly honor and woman's tenderness of heart
If he faced the world with clenched hand it was
because the world had been very hard to him.
The Bishops eyes still upon the picture.
"He-is-deadT 1 nodded. He dropped his hand
one instant upon my clasped IF he was as
loyal friend as you are the friendship notable
one, that might well be enyied by others"
AS he seated himself | stood for few moments IN IN
frowning thought, and for the second time that day
he asked, ''Well?" and then, What is itT'
Interpretation.
And answered 1T Is not pleasant to be puzzled
and mortified at ones self" Then falling into near
by low chair 1 asked, viii you try to interpret me
to myself"
He was most serious and curt in a moment as he
asked what puzzles you? Why are you mortified?
Tell me about it."
"You must have noticed how confirmed sufferers
cling to life. Well, here the slave of pain from
babyhood I have struggled with uncounted maladies.
I've narrowly escaped from fires, been in wrecks by
land and water. I've met with weird accidents.
carry many Il from these bufetings, but do you
think l tired of it all and want to die? Do you
think willing to die when called? Not a
bit of it, and right there my trouble comes in with the
subject of death.
I'm all my life have been so much of a Christian
steadfast belief i'll the promise of God Of low
ing if unsuccessful, effort to remember and to live
by the Masters words could make me- yet am afraid
to die Much praised by others for courage for
ence of mind in danger, yet secretly was afraid of
death. Then suddenly day all seemed clear TO
The Bible said were born to sin-that
the trouble. l could not of my effort conquer this
fear, but l could make public avoWal of faith by
entering the Church of my veneration; would
know the comfort of the two great sacraments. bap
tism and the sacred communion; should be dead to
the old sins, born TO new righteousness; should
then regard death gently, release, rs reward,
and fear it no more forever and"--
Silence-long heavy silence. l looked at him.
smile of utter amusement was on his lips. He nodded
his head. go on-what was the result? And" he
prompted me, "AndY
l felt the blood in my face, but went on:-"And
bit ago l found myself alone behind two botng
horses, without room to run them out. Destruction
seemed inevitable and with every bit of strength and
nerve had strove for fe-worse for just as the
crash came prayedl prayed God not TO let me die
thus casting my cowardce in the very face of my
Creator | landed bruised and bleeding. a supposed
Christan-yet afraid to die. What is the ma 'er
with meP demanded. l believe truly do, yet of
course, Christianity is not compatible with fear of
anything God wills. and--well, | am shamed clear
through, that's ALL"
You gifted little lunatc, don't you every
has fear of death? 1t is not shameful 1t is God
planted instinct tending toward the continuation or
human life Selfpreservation is admittedly the first
law of nature. Even the brave man who dies saving
another does not Intentionally throw away his life;
he only to risk it bravely. If God did not inn
plant within that instructive love of life how many
of would stand the heat and burden of the strife;
how many endure the trouble sickness, sorrow and
pain? Every weary man heartbroken woman
would slip through the open door and the world
would be depopulated. Child your Christianity ana
your faith to be measured by your willingness
to die. have myself this instructive fear of death.
particularly shrink from the idea of railroad disaster
hope am prepared to accept Gods will as cheerfuy
may be, but distinctly understand do not wish to
die any more than you do People have been glad to
go, but most often they weary loving. tender
souls who long to join dear ones gone before or
pain worn and crave rest In you vitality in
tense, imagination strong Do not strain your
by dwelling needessly upon the thought"-
"Oh" | broke in, 81 not afraid of making a
of cries and words of terror. would have self