New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1909-03-10
Copyrighted. 1909, by Associated
Literary Press.

copyrighted. 1909, by Associated
- Literary Press.
- 20 - Z - ~. l.l4lssass
Mr.. Samuel Perkins, assisted by two
Italians, all with their coats and vests
off and perspiring profusely. was bor-
Ing an artesian well on his farm.
Suddenly the drill was forced out OF
the ground. There followed great
puff Of vapor that had the odor of bad
eggs and sulphur mixed together Mr..
Perkins had struck natural gas we'll
A month later Mrs. Perkins was say
ing to him:
Samuel, remember that we spell
our name P-a-r-k-i-n-s; also that a
month hence we sail for Europe.
We've got money. and we've got a
daughter Miranda. We are going to
give her chance
"a chance for what ?" asked the hus-
band. who was trying to get used to
wearing collar and coat around the
house.
ITO get polished up and to marry
some one worthy of her. You needn't
sit there thinking that a few weeks
ago Miranda was hanging out the
clothes. We've struck natural gas,
and that makes difference We sail
in four weeks
Il did kinder think we might go to
Niagara Falls for week or So be-
gan Samuel as he rubbed his chin
whats Niagara Falls to people with
money? What are they to Miranda ?
Samuel Parkins, can't you realize that
you struck gas?'
Il know did"
"We are climbing for the top Of the
ladder. We can't be kept down.
Haven't you got It through your head
yet? It's Europe and polish. It's Eu-
rope and a husband for Miranda. II
them Chicago butchers can take their
daughters to Europe and marry them
of to lords and dukes, why can't we?
isn't natural gas just as high toned
as pork chops? You keep a coat on
and your shoes black and get used to
looking like somebody and leave the
rest to me-
Mr.. Parkins would rather have sat
on the steps Of the village and related
for the i've hundredth time what his
emotions were when he struck gas
but he was dragged off to Europe.
Miranda betrayed a surprising lack
Of interest, but Mrs. Parkins did the
thing with all her might. She had ma
rive wit opd obsorvotIop Nv siffino
In corner most Of the time and hav-
ing as little as possible to say the hus.
band and father made out after a fash.
ion.
In due time he even became inter.
ested in things. He became so inter.
ested that one evening after they had
been in London for a fortnight he ask.
ed his wife:
MARY, are we hitting the pike all
right?'
Hitting the pike" she repeated In
| scOrnful tones. Samuel, cut the pike
and other things out Miranda and me
are watching ourselves every minute
and you want to do the same Don'l
you leave the spoon in the cup when
| you drink your coffee, and don't tucE
your table napkin clear up under your
ears. If you spoil Miranda's chances
I'll never forgive YOU
| .'But what l want to know is has
any Teller come around YETI" persist
ed the husband
mo, not exactly. But I've noticed
| h
edging around. You leave that part OF
it to us. and you tend to yours. When
ever you can, you just drop in a wore
about natural gas and millions"
"Oh, | won't spoil nobody's chances
| didn't want to come at first, but
now that I've got over here 1 raythe1
like it. Makes Teller feel as if he
was somebody to have boy ready Al
every turn to brush off his coat.
Il guess I'd be proud to have lore
or duke for son-in-law That's Mi
randa's lowest figger, hain't it? She
hain't coming over here and then take
up with no hayseed?'
| 1t was Paris after four weeks II
London, and there was continual i'm
provement in the family. Miranda
and her mother picked up as much al
one French word a day, and the hus
band and father left his fears behind
him and assumed a little swagger an6
a patronizing air that sat well on him
He had struck natural gas at hom
simply by accident He reasoned tina
he might strike husband for Mirand;
abroad in the same way. Therefor
whenever be came across any one VIII.
! would listen to him and who eoule
! speak English he introduced gas weIl