Atlanta semi-weekly journal. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1898-1920, 1909-04-20
JOKES AND J|BES
At GRIDIRON FEED
TAFT, CANNON, CABINET MEN,
BERS, DIPLOMATS AND OTII-
ERS IN THE CENTER OF STAGE
ARE TARGETS.

of the Grid Iron CLUB, that famous Ut
ganization of newspaper men, was kept
busy tonight serving up wit and humor
at a special dinner complimentary to the
new administration, given in the banquet
hall of the New Willard.
Care was taken that men prominent in
the public eye got all that was coming
to them in the way of thrusts and Jioes
that kept the great assemblage IN a
constant state of uproar And then, too
there were some skits by an aggrega-
ton of scintillating stars that would
have put to blush many who count them
selves in the class of professionals.
OF course President Taft was there, as
were Speaker Cannon, members OF the
cabinet and the diplomatic corps, senat-
ors and representatives, men high in the
industrial and financial world, and plen-
tv of others of distinction. In the OBJ
sence of President Henry Hall, who Is
lust recovering from a long illness, Vice
President Scott C. Bone, of the WASH
.ington Herald, presided over the even
ings doings.
"Great Minstrel Show"
The onslaught on the banquet room be-
gan when the clubs old-fashioned diner
bell announced that everything was
ready. AS soon as the diners were seat
ed, the room was thrown into darkness
while a musical welcome was extendeo
TO the distinguished guests. Then the
mammoth electric gridiron fia'iheo into
view. the lights were turned on through
out the room and the fun commenced.
Almost the first thing to greet the
guests was a handful distributed by
some speedy messenger boys, announc-
ing that there would be a great mtstrel
show by all-star performers. including
''vocalists, comedians and cabinet ON.
GERS" This, undoubtedly was the MT
of the evening. In true minstrel fashion,
with all the accompaniment OF clusters
and a more or less discordant band, this
troupe of club talent paradod through
the hall before going on the stage.
Eating Through Georgia"
The program of the show was clever
imitation of the real thing, even to
the naming of the executive staff, togeth-
err with a special mote by the manage
ment" which called attention to what
was to come and with the injunction
that there should be no flowers. Eat
ing Through Georgia" was the opener
and and it ran like this:
Sound the good old dinner norm, we
sing another song,
About the trip that Taft once made, when,
with digestion strong,
He ate his share of everything that they
would bring along,
AS he went eating through Georgia.
1--WE tackled the opossum that they took
such care to bake,
I'VE didn't even draw the line at alliga-
tor steak
As we went eating through Georgia
BY southern hospitality our hearts were
And we resolved to do the very best that
could be done
For Democrats; and so we saved some
pie for Dickinson,
AS we went eating through Geor-
gia.
And the chorus! Well. il would CRATE on
the nerves of a hungry man II he heard
these words:
"Hurrah! Hurrah! We sound the jubilee
Hurrah! Hurrah! Twas something fine to
see,
We put away three meals a day
And some times three times three.
AS we went eating through Georgia"
Presidents Messages
Then there ensued some lively con-
versation between the middle man. who
posed as "Vice President" and the
Speaker of the House." and the Cab
met Officers" who composed the bal
ance of the troup.
After a good deal of sparring over what
was the meaning of dead literature"
and whether 1t referred to Sanscript or
Aztec, the end man declared it to be
presidents messages
Say Mr.. Vice President" a member
of the cabinet inquired, do you remem-
Der the morning all those boilers blew
up and scared a lot of people?'
oh Yes. 1 remember it perfectly, but
l do not see why it should have scared
anybody. 1t was merely big noise.'
Yes that was it. Everybody thought
Mr.. Roosevelt had come back"
A pedal BarytOne"
please leave the dear old tourists
alone; they're seeing things at night,
was the title of a song by James S.
Henry. of the Philadelphia Press, the
wonderful soft pedal barytone." in
which the trusts informed Attorney Cen
eral Wickersham that they were tired
and sleepy, too. and appealed to him to
put them in their little beds. Secretary
MacVeigh was classed among 81 varie-
ties of Democrats and reformers who
had great difficulty in remembering
when registration day came around
This discussion was cut short by some
references to the tariff which it was
stated was being talked pro and con.
Indeed" remarked the vice presi-
dent" with evident surprise.
Yes" replied the end man, pro means
fo1-for the trusts. Con is what the con-
sumner GETS
The white house COW, now already IA
nous, was made the subject of one Of
the best stunts of the evening. Attended
by a dairy-maid. a splendid imitation of
the bovine was led into the room, which
instantly caused the president" to in
quire whats this?'
Postum VS.. Cow
He was promptly informed that while
there had been a lot of loose talk about
the 'possum being the animal emblem Of
the present ADMINISTRATION and that the
Teddy bear was one of my policies
that had been inherited. IT was all nom
sense. THE emblem of this administra-
ton" said the animals keeper, lis the
COW and this is it,
1t was discovered that the milk-pail
was minus the tactical fluid and in it's
stead were found numerous articles
among which was a bottle tagged with
testimonial from Senator Aldrich as fol-
lows:
I'VE used this medicine on the tariff
bill and removed all Payne from il in
Stantly."
The pail was being emptied of its con-
tents when in rushed a member who inn
persOnated Castro and who demanded a