The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-08-06
DRIFTWooD
A shiftless husband ought to be
shifted the first opportunity.

k-------------------~
A shiftless husband ought to be
shifted the arst opportunity.
=5srlt
Enroll your name at once as mem.
Der OF the Don't Worry Club" 1t
| has no Initiation fees. can be organized
anywhere at any time and Its motto
Is Keep Smiling"
ding tour the neghbors throw rice at
EN-; when they come back they begin.
to borrow that rice back from ,em, also
sugar, coffee. etc.
Many a girl wastes her time cult.
waiting vocal range when she would
be better OFF at the cooking range.
Music teachers reap In money off OF
these people, viz: those who labor I'M
and are intended for the concert ss stage trs
The first real tragedy of married life
to q woman Is when her husband be-
gins to roar and swear at the bills
month. Then It is the little fool real
ICES she has not married a prince, but
just an ordinary onery cuss like any
other man.
Immigrant gypsies ought to be
barred from the United States. says a
Northern paper. But what would the
girls do for fortune tellers The gyp-.
lean girl in the way Of a fortune ana
tells her something pleasant that the
said girl Is only too glad to pay her
money to hear.
Do you realize that the Wright Broth
ers will go down In history along with
Ben franklin, Ike Watts ana the like ?.
Great men are never truly appreciated,
And speaking Of Tying machines,
the Governments has an awaiting
s fsGsna rSese srmg oesrs viii now
fly higher than ever In washington.
But Parson SNOWFALL says. Folks had
better stay on de yerth whar de good
dis mortal coil an git pair OF dem
snow white wings. from ole Marse Ca
briel. But my advice is for dem coll
onels an captains not to az toe high
bird ever few so high he didn't hab to
light"
examining District Attorney Jerome for
his sanity.
The real heat wave: Snealxina
Ground The, the corner and Sd waving VI for
Again the West Is crying for har.
| vest hands. and thousands of men are
are very unevenly distributed in this
saaay, let Uncle Sam revise the air.
ships upward. T.,
The most popular man in Montgom.
cry is the ice man, even II he does give
| you cold deal. he's good companion
to freeze to this August weathsr. And
long as you pay him promptly.
Cork rightly used is blessing to
mankind" says The Boston Herald;
with corkscrew isn't a bad way Is itg
Mr.. Bryan having failed to move to
Washington will moye to Texas: We
welcome him in such a manner as only
George Bailey knows how to hand out
the glad newspaper photographic mitt.
The wife of a meek little hsnpecked
Montgomery husband said to him as
she went out of the front door yester-
day, I'm going to knock about a lit.
the The sabs Y snIr shs Knock a aSout n
know" sighed the poor. meek husband:
That's all she ever does, Is KNOCK"
but he didn't dare tell her SO; he only
|
thought 1T was a good Joke.
Love is blind, they say. so is blind
tiger; consequently men love a blind
| tiger.
In the Land Of cover There"
In the land of over There, with her
Soul so sweet and fair.
! With her violet eyes We cherished and
| her wealth of golden hair.
She has drifted like dream, past the
| farthest star agleam.
| And the rose has lost its fragrance,
there's no laughter. in the stream.
And the stars but blink their eyes in
the far-off velvet skies.
AS though they wept IN sympathy
her laughter long, towards the
twilight time when shadows gray
| and ghostlike seem to throng.
Ana the night birds as they cry seem
more weird than a sigh and the
\ lilies seem to whisper their re-
grets that she should die;
| than we can bear. ah. God, why
take the. fairest when the others
we could sparea ~
Here are things she's touched--a chair.
or a ribbon she would wear. book.
pin, some keepsake, with that
nameless sort OF air.
! She's beyond the cares and tears, she's
beyond the ills and fears. but we
we have the emptiness Of all the
coming years.
In that land beyond the skies. with a
new light in her eyes we can only
/ say God keep her from our heart
aches and our sighs.
p. H. A.
=
Through the Mail Bag.
Selma. Ala. Aug. /, 90.
Dear "Drift"-Just want to tell You
that your work 10 appreciated and that
after you have gone we will say 'the
- - &C.. 4. -. q
in it," But say old fellow. you seem
10 forget that there is nothing TO
drown your SORROWS with now, so what
will we do II you keep hitting the ten
der spot with those beautiful >little
verses you have had lately?