The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1909-04-10
Experiment.
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Tfted his motner-ln-laW 10 i've Will
him and his wife. She accepted Both
promised 10 refrain from 'butting In
When the first born came a hundred
new complications arose As young
husband he had never before had an
infant In his arms and had never real
" seen above a dozen Of the nuisances
at close range. but be felt that he need
ed no advice from grandma. When
he set out with spoon and castor oil to I
doctor the kid for a dozen things al
once the mother-in-law had TO make
few remarks-she Just had TO.
There were occasions when the IA
Their would carry the squalling young
Eeer about head up, head down, over |
his shoulder and under his arm ana |
paw no heed TO the protests OF his |
wife OF the looks Of the mother-in-law-
There were other occasions when he |
would fling II into the lap OF the Old
lady and expect her to walk the hoor
with Il for half the night. In return
she would visit the druggist next day.
walking into the store with an iron
Iaw, but somehow she could never ask
for arsenic or strychnine. The words
always stuck, and she ended of by
asking for soda water with sarsapa-
rIlla strip There were happy hours
however. There were hours when the
rnother-in-law and son-in-law sat down
and told each other that 1t surely must
have been the work Of Providence to
bring them together. They almost
held hands over IT, They felt just
pride in realizing that they were the
only mother-in-law and son-in-law on
fne face OF the wide earth that ever
Hved ia the same house and loved each
other
A crisis must eventually come In the
happiest family. One came IN tnis'
It came one day after the mother-in-
law had carried in ton OF coal ana
beaten two carpets. On the same day
the son-Iu-law had discovered that the
old lady was In the habit OF coming
downstairs at midnight and cooking
herself a late supper. There were no
words over either circumstance. On
the contrary. they sat and smiled at
each other and purred ike two kittens.
She was Informed that but for her
presence In the house life would have
held little or nothing for the man be-
fore her, and she reciprocated by say
ing that she never knew what that
conplacency and contentment meant
until she made her home with him
II was a feeling hour. The fountains
of the deep were broken up, and
neither felt ashamed Of the tears In
their eyes nor their quivering lips.
Next morning both were missing On
stand in his bedroom aud on the
bureau In her bedroom the distracted
wife found epistles. The one from the
husband read:
Il invited my mother-in-law to pass
the rest Of her days with me and con-
tribute to our happiness. had always
held TO the theory that the wife's
mother, particularly II she had an Iron
Jaw and a mind Of her own, could rem
der the little woodblne cottage OF her
son-in-law a paradise on earth. Men
argued with me In vain. When the
opportunity came / tried II. There
was to be no butting in on the other
side. II was to be one long, happy
day. 1t has been. go to my reward
simply because l can't send her &c
hers. Ever since her first week in the
said woodbine l have never for ar
hour been clear Of thoughts Of muir
der. They have always been thoughts
OF numbering a mothefin-law. In I'm
agination 1 have given her nine DIFF
ferent poisons; FIVE times l have dis
membered her with the ak; eight times
have / stolen upstairs at midnight t.
choke her to death with my strons
fingers. l have hired chauffeurs Il
try to run over her. and / have re
moved the steps from the cellar stair
IN hopes to precIpitate her to the &c
ment and break her back.
"Tn conclusion let me say" the state
ment went on, "as she refuses TO di
for me I have decided to die for her
We have grown to be too happy. Tn
deadly monotony has come. and
haven't the strength to endure It. NJ,
cold body will be found hanging in th
wood shed. Love TO you and the XII
and any number Of best regards TO tn
dear old lady. ] know she will mouri
me-"
The letter Of the mother was equall
interesting.
when you read this, my dear daugf
ter" she began. "tbe body Of you
mother VIII be found at the bottom @
Gray's mill pond have been thini
ing Of taking this step for long tins
have been too happy with my son-ir
law. That happiness has begun
pail Think of having a son-in-la'
and yet be bound by the most solem
promise not TO call him brute. vi
lain and a wretch dozen times day
Think Of how have had to keep N
hands OF him when fairly ached I
wash them in his blood! Think OF th
sleepless nOurs have spent in cril
pling and mangling and murderin
him in imaginatSni 1 believe that
could live with my son-in-law and fe
that I was living IN the suburbs
heaven itself 1t has been a grand su
cess. but only up TO q certain poin
The element OF murder has been lac
ing. He has never given me q show
kill him OF. die because be won't.
know he win mourn me. but mu
go. | shall make all calculations
meet him In another cline. where
can perhaps get at him with g stick
stove wood or be can throw me ov
the kitchen rgurp and Our of the WI