davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
RECMENTAL REUNION

The 9th, 10TH 18th ana 10Th Iowa
Infantry Regiments will bold Z re-
union, in Washineto lows. Septem-
Der twenty ninth ana thirtieth, 1909.
commencing the morning Of the 10Th
and closing the evening Of the 3Oth.
Members Of these organizations are
cordially and urgently requested to
make arrangements at once to be ON
hand the first morning Of the meeting.
The good people Of Washington will
do everytI ing possible to make this
meeting q pleasant one to the Old
Soldiers Guests, and therefore the
best of the city will be yours while
there. Comrades. Comrades Time
with us is passing swiftly by, very
soon soldiers reunions Of the survivors
of the Civil War will be things Of the
past, q very large majority Of our
comrades. are already on the other
shore. is it not proper then for every
surviving member to make special
effort 20 meet once more, and enjoy
the communion. Of memories Of the
historic past; when sas boys We bore =
humble part In the great contests on
the terrible battle fields. it is there-
fore hoped that all will make q special
effort to be there, the musicians are
wanted to bring their fifes and drums.
that We may keep step to the old
music again. The post Office addresses
OF large number are unknown, to
such who see this notice, it is desired
that you send postal card giving your
address and that Of others you may
know about for it 10 desired to have
the address Of every member Of these
regiments and those who cannot be
with US write letter giving some
miniscence Of your army experience,
and should any old Confederate read
this notice. who Was in our front in
the battle Of Prairie Grove, Ark !.
Shiloh. Tenn. VicksbnrR. Miss. At
lanta. Georgia, Norganzie, louisiana,
(where the 10th Iowa was captured or
Spanish Fort. Alabama. he too is in
vited to be with us, or to write some-
thing of his experiene in those en-.
|gassments, might tell what be knew
about the Grey backs. for that would
be interesting to the Yanks. Address
Accommodations to the undersigned.
John ". Morton. Go. CO.. 10th iowa.
Inft. Washing ton. Iowa.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
a Man 81 Me.n.,

Stern Parent Ethel, young Fledgiey
gave me to understand he was man
Of means when he asked for your
hand.
Ethel-He is man Of means, father.
Stern Parent-But he only makes
$1,000 year.
Ethel-well. he means to make moro.
New York Press.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
apav.;I;.h.

'Hellov' cried Cheeriman. GLOW are
you, old man?''
Don't old man me-" snapped
Groucher. who was becoming touchy
about his age II don't look like an
old man, do 2"
We'll, no. Just at this minute you
look more like the old boy "-Catho.
lie Standard and Times.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
Indictment Of FIat Life.

In proportion as fiat life increases
home life decreases. The fiat dweller
ought not to keep dog, prefers not 10
keep q cat, cannot have garden. has
no CHARGE OF Keeping house, has NO
possible Place for memories, and. most
emphaticGly Of all, has no Use or
accommodation for babies. Fortnight
ly Review.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
Matrimoniallv spe.k;na.

MasrlmohiaIIy Speaking. A.
a preacher, remarked the gener
3ator OF: useless ideas. ''is a poor math
ematician."
"Why?" queried the chap nho Is al
ways there with nibble.
Because. he adds one and one to
gether and the total is one" explained
the other Chicago News.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
Safety n Labor

safety In Labor.
Sturgeon: The devil never tempt
ed a man whom he found judiciously
employed.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
CHICKENS.

THINK little bit o. yeller legged,
funny chick
y II just about the cutest and most low
in little trick
OF anything tibet we kin raise or git out
on the farm,
might o. charm
About q cuddlin' little chick the way 1t
tells you '.Peep!''
AZ soon as it breaks from the she'll, and
then the way they keep
Right after bugs from night till morn to
line their wee inside!
And later on like 'em, too-but then /
like EN- fried.
They tell me that the old hens lay enough
In year
To end to end go round the world and
back or pretty near.
Or build pyramid as high as Egypt's
pyramids
I love to think Of them old times when
we was little kids,
How we swtped eggs and hid 'em in our
shirts. and of we ran
And built fire in the woods and boiled
EN- In can
And ct EN- settin' side by side way out
there on the grass
The while we built air castles. Lord. how
boyhood days do pass!
Good gracious. how they do 20 by! One
day were just boy,
And skies are blue and birds sing loud
and life is full Of joy,
And then we're growed up to man with
gray hairs on our head
And thinkin' of old playmates who are
married or are dead!
All. WE'LL started out to talk of little
chicks!
They are the independentest and cutes,
little tricks
II had my way. I'd do thing that
would surprise you-then
The nations emblem wouldn't be an
eagle. but hen!
u. M Lewis In Houston Post
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
Another eunko.

Silas Poor old Hiram Hardapple!
he saw an ad. in farm paper that
stated for So they would send him the
prettiest pointer ever seen in this state.
Cyrus-Gosh: And was the dog as
represented?
Silas-Dog! Why, the blamed bun.
koers sent him stuffed porcupine. :
Detroit Free Press. ..,.,..,
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-08-18
Fever and chilli.

lection" said the sentimental young
woman.
Does he?" responded Miss Cayenne
Yes. And then he says cast chill
over his existence"
Are you sure 1t is love he is de.
scribing and not malaria ?''-Washing
ton Star.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
THE RIVER SEINE.
ITS Contact With Paris on Its Journey
to tho Sea.

10 IN. SEES.
Inevitoh,v in ito nass,,o thror,,
robe are hlnrred nv contact with tho
volumas of smoka which occos,ono,,v
hing mon Ito surface ana stoinod hv
the Imnnritias which roach ~ IRON, ~.
str.o,s Thorc,, - a,,,,.,,, ua,.,a,,, a..
nr,st,ne h,nanass oftor Tho tort,eoa
,,ons have naon ,ast hoh,na a. 4, nama,
oa,in ,,ito rho ,n.anhist,.a,a1 r,ror
tint :, wos hafora Re par,s axnor,on.a
Its ,yo TORS ora loss ur,n,s ~ $50,
,nora narvoms Mil u e. ,, s~tss
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20

The fanction-strengthenin and tissue
building plan of treating chronic, lingering
and obstinate cases of disease as pursued by
DIR, Pierce, is following after Natures plan of
restoring health.
He uses natural remedies, that is extracts
from native medicinal roots, prepared by pro-
cesses wrought ont by the expenditure of
much time and money, without the use of al
cohol, and by skillful combination in Just the
right proportions.
Used as ingredients of DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery, Black Cherry bark Queens
root, Golden Seal root, Bloodroot and Stone
root, specially exert their influence in cases of
ling, bronchial and throat troubles, and this
Discovery is therefore, IA sovereign remedy
for bronchitis laryngtis, chronic coughs
catarrh and kindred ailments
The above native roots also have the strong.
est possible endorsement from the leading
medical writer's, of all the several schools OF
practice, for the cnre not only OF the disease
named above but also for indigestion, torpor
of liver, or biliousness, obstinate constipation
kidney and bladder troubles and catarrh, nc
matter where located
Send to DR., X. V. Pierce, of Buffalo, N. Y.
for free booklet telling all about the medicin.
al roots composing this wonderful medicine
Their is no alcohol in it.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
TO AlLlNG WOMEN.
A Little Sound Advice will Help Many a
Sufferer in LambertviIe.

No woman can be healthy and well
if the kidneys are sick. Pois-
ons that pass off in the secretions when
the kidneys are well, are retained in
the body when the kidneys are sick
Kidneys and bladder become inhamed
and swollen and worse troubles quickly
follow This is often the true cause Of
bearing down pains, lameness, back
ache, sideache, etc. Uric poisoning
also causes headaches, dizzy spells, Ian
guor, nervousness and rheumatic pains.
When suffering SO, try Doan's Kidney
Pills, remedy that cures sick kidneys
You will get better as the kidneys get
better, and health will return when the
kidneys are we'll Let a Lambertville
woman tell you about Doan's Kidney
Pills.
Mrs Kate Kearns, "a Buttonwood ST., Lam
bertville, N j., says: Prior to using Doan's
Kidney Pills, suffered intensely from pains
through the small of my back and sides.
Headaches and dizzy spells were frequent
and was scarcely able to do my Homework
L lost great deal OF sleep and in the morning
would arise feeling miserable. After trying
many remedies without finding relief l pro-
cured box of Doan's Kidney Pills at Geo NJ
Shamalia's drug store and through their use
| was quickly benefited. / continued taking
them and the result was a cure. can now do
my homework without any trouble whatever
and feel better in every way"
For sale by all dealers. Price so
cents. Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo,
New York, sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name-Doan's- and
take no other.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
SMOKING A PIPE.
II 10 Said to Give the Face a Square
Jawed Effect.

It 10 Said to Give the Face Square
Jawed Effect.
'"There is one question always ask
Z man who wants job" remarked
the business man who has to hire sew
ernl hundred men for different posi-
tions each year.
1.-The question l always ask them Is,
DO you smoke pipe fluchY or
course the answers are various. Some
of them smoke pipe great deal and
others not at all.
"Why do ask about the pipe? Well.
not that | have the least interest In
their habits or that l have any preju-
dice one way or another In the mat
ter. The reason is that l want to
know whether the formation Of their
lower jaws Is natural or acquired.
"A man with firm lower jaw is al
ways man of parts and of will. l
say 'always'-anyway, most always. II
he does not smoke pipe his square
jaw, back near where 1t hinges on to
the upper one, is natural. If he is a
pipe smoker the looks are deceiving
and l have to judge his caliber some
other way.
"Pipe smokers always have strong
muscles back on the face about the
place man stops when he makes the
first stroke downward In shaving.
These are the muscles that hold the
jaws together. They often give a
square jawed effect to man who
hasn't any square jaw characteristics.
My men think l ask funny questions.
but there's reason."-New York
Times
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
Pantomime Performances.

Most pantomime characters were orig
inaIly borrowed from the Italians. The
first real English pantomime was pro-
duced at theater In Lincoln's Inn
Fields In 1920. 1t was called "Harle-
auin Executed" and its subtitle was
"A New Italian Comic Scene Between
a Scaramouche. Harlequin. Coun-
try Farmer, His Wife and Others
The performance was very successful.
About the middle of the eighteenth
century the character Of pantomime
performances was completely altered.
chiefly because of the genius OF the
famous Grimaldi. who kfade the clown
the first figure in the pantomime. Girl
maldl first appeared at Sadler's Wells
theater, where he played the part OF
monkey. He was actively engaged on
the stage fer forty-nine years, and ut
the close of his career he took bene-
fit at Drury Lane theater which real
lied nearly 1900. He also received EGO
from the Drury Lane fund. This was
in June, 1923. He died in 1887 and was
buried In the churchyard of st. James
chapel, Pentonville Hill.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
THERMOMETERS.
Testing Processes at the National
Weather Bureau.

Weather Bureau.
Each day at the weather bureau in
Washington the thermometers received
from various manufacturers through
out the country are put through the
test of standardizing them.
The various processes through which
the bulbs pass before they are labeled
accurate are easy, inasmuch as there
is practically little scientific work at
tached to the test When thermom-
eter is frst handed to the man in the
testing room 1t is dipped into a vat
filed with compound far below the
freezing point. 1t is thrust in at the
point where it happens to be at the
time and worked up and down until
the degree of the compound is reached.
Having then recorded the lowest tenn
perature, the process of testing for the
highest is begun This is just as sim
pie as testing for the low temperature.
The bulb is dipped into vat of water,
first at GO degrees. Then it is worked
gradually until 1870 degrees is reached.
II the mercury In the bulb will indi-
cate 1870 degrees further testing Is I'M
necessary, because that is a tolerably
warm temperature and one seldom If
ever reached by natural heat.
A thermometer the bulb of which
contains mercury will not register
lower than % degrees below Zero-tbat
is mercury will freeze at that point.
In this country very little use Is
found for thermometers showing more
than % degrees below zero. but in the
far north they are Of course necessary
Such instruments. however, contain
spirits in the bulbs instead Of mer-
curry, but even this fluid becomes slug
gish when 40 or 50 below zero is re-
corded, and it will seldom show 60 be.
low.-Harper's Weekly.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
HOW A HORSE GALL0PS.
The Natural Way and tho Conventional
Pose In Art.


How does horse gallop? Owing to
the rapidity of action 1t cannot be seen
by the human eye. However, just as
the individual spokes of rapidly re-
volving wheel can be made visible by
flash of lightning. SO the action OF
galloping horse can be and has been
analysed by instantaneous photogra-
ply
The statuette of Sysonby, the thor
onghbred. has been made from photo
graphs taken ut the Instant when all
four legs are off the ground. The back
liz arched. the hind feet are directed
forward. the fore feet backward. so
that all are tucked under the animals
body,
When the limbs again touch the
ground the first to do so Is one of the
hind feet. which Is thrust far forward
so as TO form an acute angle with the
line of the body and thus serve the
purpose of spring In breaking the
force of the impact of the hoof when
the horse is going at top speed.
In the conventional mode OF repre-
stuliHS u Euiiopiug Hotse all iout ieSS
are off the ground ut once. but the
front pair are extended backward In
such a way that the undersurfaces of
their hoofs are directed skyward, the
body being at the same time brought
near the ground. This conventional
pose appears to have been derived from
dog running. when the front and
hind pairs Of legs are respectively ex-
tended forward and backward. with
the soles of the hind feet turned up
ward.
This pose. It is thought. was adopt
cd to represent the gallop Of the horse
by the goldsmiths of Mycenae between
500 and 1000 Il. c.. whence 1t was
transmitted by way of Persia and ST.
IBERIA to China and Japan, TO return
In the eighteenth century as the re-
suit OF commercial relations to west
ern Europe. Tribune.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
Shampoo.

A mid-eighteenth century traveller.
who is the first person known to have
made English Of the word .sha mpoo,"
wrote that "shampooing is an opera
ton not known in Europe and is pc
culiar to the Chinese. which had once
the curiosity to go through, and for
which / paid but tribe. However,
had I not seen several Chinese mer-
chants shampooed before me I should
have been apprehensive of danger.
even at the sight Of all the different
instruments" The original sham
poo" as this travellers detailed ac-
count and other illusions for long
after his time show. was very much
what we call massage" now. 1t was
from India that the word really came.
and 1t represents the imperative Of a
verb meaning to knead.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
British and German Physique.

Ten millions of our people inhabit
dwellings inferior to the kennels pro-
vided for the hounds In well man
aged hunt The results of living In
dwellings unfit for human habitation
and the prevalence Of dietary scale
from which English meat. bread and
milk are excluded are fatal to success
full rivalry with virlle and healthy
race where agriculture Is fostered for
strategical reasons.
Having spent hours In watching the
arrival Of the early morning trains in
Berlin and Hamburg. am appalled,
with the contrast between the vigor-
GUS and well set up. broad chested and
healthy looking clerks, brawny shop
men and stalwart laborers on the 9th
er side Of the North sea and the cham
payne shouldered. COW hooked. pigeon
chested, lack luster trainfuls OF men
of the same classes landed at Liver
pool street, Victoria and Charing Cross.
Arnold White in London World.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
-HEUAMBERTVILLE RECORD
OCTOBER 20. 1909.
A LIBERAL OFFER.
It's Effect Upon the Customer to Whom
Il Was Made.

Its Effect Upon the Customer to Whom
It Was Made.
A business man of Dayton. O., tells
this story of some commercial friends
of his:
A customer who bought in small
way from the wholesalers and whose
credit was not of the sort known as
gilt edged visited the city and pur-
chased a $500 bill Of goods, paying
$500 in cash and giving his note for
the remaining $500.
After the transaction had been closed
and the paper and currency had chang
ed hands the customer said:
Now, after a deal Of that size 1t II
customary to give purchaser pres
ent. Come across with it."
wen throw In pair of suspen-
ders," laughed the salesman temporiz-
ingly.
"a pair of suspenders, eh. Say, quit
fooling. really mean 1t. ] expect you
to do something in acknowledgment OF
my patronage"
The salesman went to the manager
with the problem, and the manager
said:
"Well, If he feels that way about 1t
we might encourage him bit. Well
do something that ought to please him
greatly. Give him back his $500 note.
Make him present Of his paper. That
will make him cash customer and
raise his credit and save him money
besides"
The salesman went back, pleased to
be the bearer of such joyful tidings of
liberality in business.
well SIR" he said, we've arranged
about that present, all right. Here
with flourish, "is your note. We give
1t back to you"
The customer did not seem enthusi
astic. Instead, without looking at the
note he asked:
rs It indorsedW
No" said the salesman in astonish
ment.
"Then | guess you better gimme thu
suspenders" said the disappointed Gus
tomer.-Ch4>ago News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
Self Evident.

One Of the dangers Of little knowl-
edge is that It's possessor rarely esti-
mates it at its true value. Ignorance.
It has been said, bestows her choicest
gifts on those who value her least
A conceited undergraduate once said
to his teacher that he feared he had
rather a contempt for Plato.
81 am afraid. Mr.. Johnson" replied
the teacher. that your contempt has
not been bred by famillarity."-Youth's
COmnanion
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
Rosist Mechanically.

Never give way to melancholy. Re-
sist 1t steadily, for the habit will en-
croach. once gave a lady two and
twenty recipes against melancholy
one was bright fire; another to re-
member all the pleasant things said to
and Of her; another to keep a box of
sugar plums on the chimney piece aud
a kettle simmering on the hob. l
thought this mere tritiing at the mo-
ment. but have In after life discovered
how true 1t is that these little pleasures
often Danish melancholy better than
higher or more exalted objects; that no
means ought to be thought too trifing
which can oppose 1t either In ourselves
or other&-Sydney Smith.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
SfIfnn

The old gentleman went into the par.
lor the other night at the witching
hour of 1920 and found the lights out
and his daughter aud dear friend
enjoying a tete-a-tete in a corner by
the window
"Evangeline." said the old man stern
~, this is scandalousr'
Eyes, papa" she answered sweetiy.
1T Is candleless because times are
hard. Lights cost so much Ferdinand
and l said we would get along with
the starlight"
And papa turned about In speech
less amazement and tried to walk out
of the room through a panel In the
wall aper.-Exchapge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
He Studied It.

II. Rider Haggard In "A Winter PHI
grimage' tells this anecdote:
''When was soaring human boy
my father took me up the Rhine by
boat with the hope and expectation
that my mind would be improved by
contemplating Its lovely and historic
banks. Worrying of this feast very
soon, slipped down to the cabin to
enjoy one more congenial, that of Rob
inson Crusoe.' But some family trat
tor betrayed me. and. protesting even
with tears that hated views, was
dragged to the deck again. I have
paid Q thalers,' shouted my justly in
dignant parent as he hauled ME up
the steamer stairs, for you to study
the Rhine scenery, and. whether you
like 1t or not, young man, study 1t you
SHALL"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
Tho Difference.

Father" said little Rollo, what IL
the difference between farming and
agriculture?
well. my son. for farming you need
a pillow and harrow and n lot of other
implements. and for agriculture all
you need Is pencil and piece OF
paper" Washington Star.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
The Mess In the Oven.

"How came such greasy mess in
the oven?" said fdgety old spinster
to her maid of all work.
"Why." replied the girl. "the candles
fell into the water, and put them into
the oven to dry."-London Taller
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20
A Good Alarm Clock.

Husband-Why don't you have the
cook shut the kitchen door? One can
smell the breakfast cooking all over
the house. Wife-We leave 1t open on
purpose. The smell Is all that gets the
family up.-.Iudge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20

Many a young man starts in to work
fired with a noble ambition. Then the
ambition evaporates, and he gets fired,
Chicago News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20

When you forget there are other,
you are nearing burned bridge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1909-10-20

True honor leaves no room for hest.
tation or doubt.-Plutarch.