davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09

bandana handker-
chief which he then wound round one
hand and continued
4 don't allow TO have no trouble
with m neighbors. but"
Wait minute said Editor Rich
ard Harding Dawson, reaching for his
pencil and pad. Wait minute.
( Uncle Zed.-
Now I'll read as I write and when
YOU don't like it you say so"
All right, Mr. Dawson. piously as
sented Uncle" Zed with due appre-
citation and qualification in his modu-
/ lated voice.
Some low down miscreant,- read
I the editor. scribbling. whose heart is
about the size OF flea and whose
head must be shaped like a tack. afro
ciously, maliciously and with malice
aforethought, shot that fine, big fam
lily dog
Uncle Zed's face fell and his lips
quiyered as he Interrupted:
His name was 'Shep. Mr. Dawson.
'Shep' was his name
"All right-'that fine, big, family
dog Shep. owned by Uncle Zed Hop
kins. Saturday night A man that
would shoot dog like Shep is the
greenest scum OF the earth and hang
ing is too good for HIM,
How's that. Uncle Zed?"
Good. mighty good.7 testified the I.
patriarch, rubbing his hands gleefully 4
and squirning in the creaking chair, /
but amt We goin' to mention no 4
names?"
Why. yes. I might. Mr. Hopkins;
that is if you desire it,
Well. I amt insistin' none. but I've
took yer paper long time, Mr.. Dav-
ison, a long time
1t is our painful duty in this con-
nection.' resumed the editor. TO
announce we have among us family
so lost TO common decency and the
mandates of society. as TO kill an in
nocent and unsssuming dog Il
by lingo. that's great. interposed
Uncle Zed with JOY in his voice;
''that1l make EN- cringe some.
guess. Go ahead. editor, go ahead" l.,
As TO kill an innocent and unss-
Stunning dog. and. TO make long story
short, the name is Higgins {
Uncle" Zed brought his cane to the |
floor with an enthusiastic clatter:
'Hurrah, Say. editor, you're a I
trump. You're man with tn cour- =
sge o his convictiors You're a a
what's that? Sign it, Sign it.i1 a
Uncle Zed arose hastily from his h
hair his surprise paramount V
Me sign it,.," a
You certainly don't want me TO as p
ume responsibility for it, AIR Hop L
Inns. My dog hasn't been killed" ex-
'ostulated the editor with smile in "
lis eye that Uncle" Zed did not h
ee. v
Thunder in the winter time, Great b
orn spoons and little fishes, or all h
he fool editors ever see YOU are the
-ust," shouted Uncle" Zed. waving M
is cane. his bandana and his whisk- $,
rs all at one and the same time. as b;
e stumped away. de
And the next day Editor Richard be
arding Dawson was notified by mail e.
stop Uncle" Zed's paper III
But he didn't do it. 4 country edi- ma
r knows a thing or two about hui 81
an nature. Uncle" Zed would have M
zen really angry had the editor com It
led with the order nj
Q Q Q 'e
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09

Ma sex II 7 am good she thinks
Al Santa Claus viii not forget
To leave nice red seed fer me-
o. III BE- oful good. you bet
Sic seq IN sooder that / ara
Thee redder that there sled will be-
And ii viii haf thee snoothest SHOES
That she about most ever see
I'm uein' good as pie, I AM,
Why. ev'ry Inornin- when she cries:
% Willie cum. Git I'd. its dag
The way l dress is q surprise,
Pa laughs q little and De SCI
shakin' wisely Of his head.
II gittin' up viii fix III thing
That Christmas sled VIII be BLOOD
RED.
I bring thee wood and bed thee COW
And do the daily chores I'D brown
I oct you Santa Claus will say
That I'm ia bestest boy in Jown,
Pa sez 10 ma, He's doin fine.
Ma sex 10 pa. Amt ne thee DEAR
An then she wishes. very sad.
That Christmas lasted all th=e year.
o Q Q
Exits.
A boys conscience frequently tells
him that he is doing wrong. but he
compromises BY remembering that his
mother says he should not believe
everything he hears
The newly rich nabob who boasts
that he started in life with bare feet.
hasn't any the best Of rs. IN all my
life never heard OF a man being
born with his shoes on.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09
Q Q .
Power Of the Press.

breezy Incident was THAI which oc-
CURED the other day ID the Office Of a
Poias. Louisiana. newspaper. Three men
called t. force the editor 70 rerract
somethinS thar he had printed. shoot
ing began promptly. and as a result one
OF the visitors IS ~ isli another IS in the
hospital ana the editor IS ssni making
copy at the old staItd. The power OF
the press Is Bound &c prevail
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09

1fnA OnitlTs q ,
pouring over a
list Of delinquent
subscribers a n q
wondering If the
ghost could posi-
bly, have spirit
enough to walk
Saturday night,
when Uncle Zed
Hopkins came in.
Il was plain 70
b e s G en- tn at
Uncle Zed was
mad. He seated
himself in h {
s pare sanctum
chair, s ct his
doughty elm cane
upright between
his knees. built a
meeting house"
Of his fingers and
b c g a Z deliber-
ately:
Editor Dawson,
/ We took tn
Chronicle nigh
onto ten year, an
/ amt asst many (
favors OF We. but I
I've come now to Z
have We wallop /
those Higginses
that killed my dog
Shept" /
At this juncture
Uncle" Zed wiped
his eyes on a red
bandana handker-
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09
Q Q O
He Wilted.

Wilt thou take her for thy "pard'' for
better or worse; 10 have to hold. TO
fondly guard. tn hauled OF in the
hearses Wilt thou Let her have her way.
consult her many wishes. make the
fires UP every day and help her with
the disheSs WIKI thou give her all the
''stun'' her little purse will pack buy
her monkey. boa and mum a Nttle
seal skin sacdues Wit thou comfort and
support her father. mother. Aunt Ie-
NINA, Uncle John. thirteen sisters and
brother And his face grew paie aud
blank. il was too late TO iilt as through
the chapel door he sank he sadly SAD
Il VIII. Anderson ;Okla) Globe.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1909-07-09
VISITS WITH
- MCLEEY
Uncle zed's Doc.

Richard Harding Dawson. editor
and proprietor Of the Croix County
(th-crfo1a
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Sheer white goods, in fact, any fine
wash goods when new, owe much Of
their attractiveness to the way they
are laundered, this being done in
manner to enhance their textile beau
ty. Home laundering would be equal
ly satisfactory if proper attention was
given to starching, the first essential
being good Starch, which has sufficient
strength to stiffen, without thickening
the goods. Try Defiance Starch and
you will be pleasantly surprised at the
improved appearance of your work.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
TROUBLE in ROYAL PALACE.
Tidings Borne by Amateur Actor Suf-
ficient to Lead Hearers to Ex-
pect the Worst.

The Shakespeare club of New Or
leans used to give amateur theatrical
performances that were distinguished
for the local prominence of the actors.
Once a social celebrity, with a gor-
geous costume, as one Of the lords in
waiting had only four words to say:
"The queen has swooned." AS he
stepped forward his friends applauded
vociferously. Bowling his thanks, he
faced the king and said, in a high
pitched voice: "The swoon has
queened."
There was a roar Of laughter; but
he waited patiently, and made an
other attempt:
"The sween has cooned."
Again the walls trembled and the
stage manager said in voice which
could be heard all over the house;
Come off, you doggoned fool"
But the ambitious amateur refused
to surrender, and in a rasping fall
setto, as he was assisted off the stage,
he screamed: 'The coon has
sweened. success Magazine.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
The Newer Way.

Many ideas in regard to women
have entirely changed, and among
the better and wiser changes is that
old thought that the women who
were given to good works must needs
be dowdy. 1t is undeniable that
good" women used to wear dowdi.
ness as a sort of hall mark of vir-
tue. AS a matter of fact, dowdiness
is merely a mark of bad taste and a
sign of some lack in the mind. Won
en- are no longer lacking in the wis
dom that chooses pretty rather than
ugly clothing, and those who do not
make the best of their appearance are
losing a golden opportunity of giving
pleasure.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Austria
Ambitious
for Strong
Navy
By CAPT. HENRY S. FORBES

destroyers and "a large and upae torpedo boats As
to-day fleet greatly inferior the English
fleet in the Mediterranean.
Now significance of the evolution of Austria a
difficult Austria while friendly Great
Britain Germanys loyal ally In of the fleet of Austria with
o deroy and torpedo boats would be the
service of Germany.
oveawn picture imagine Austrian fleet in the Med
where with force hold back the conquest of Malta
Cyprus Egypt control of Egypt
of the canal would follow and then rhps could be sent
by the cape to India 1t may be that
Aurian have such aggressive abut with pres
expand 3OOOO with splendid organization and vessels
TRIM would prepoeous dreamhat of primacy
Mediterranean With big navy when the fatal hour of strife
England Germany could taking
dictate conditions the late
Balkan crisis.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Your Salary.

The universe pays every man in his
own coin; If you smile, it smiles upon
you in return; if you frown, you will
be frowned at; If you sing, you will
be invited into gay company; If you
think, you will be entertained by
thinkers; and if you love the world
and earnestly seek for the good that
Is therein, you will be surrounded by
loving friends, and nature will pour
into your lap the treasures of the
earth. Censure, criticise and hate, and
you will be censured, criticised and
hated by your fellow men.-N w.
Zimmerman.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Won't
Cry
Easily i'm
Future
By DR.. M. C. O'coNNOR

to America
tell which party showed the deepest emohonshe
ones going or those behind but the manifestations of grief
distressing being Irish myself and naturally sympathetic the tears
sned my face and much affected those
directly concerned 1t sight to melt even the hardest heart
An hour or SO later the ship well under way, turned my
stems in the direction bokehrd emgrants Remembering
parting act expected of them still weeping To my
ent in getting their quarters heard gay strains Of music
the sounds Of dancing laughter Sure enough there they were
sons and daughters tripping the vees naugh
Init oyousn reflected their features they joked
The sadness Of only brief minutes before entirely
put away
Verify in that the laugh and the tear always company
But it's going sunough of misery to
fearful stage hereafter, promise You.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Laundry work at home would be
much more satisfactory if the right
Starch were used. In order to get the
desired stiffness, 1t is usually neces-
sary to use so much starch that the
beauty and fineness of the fabric is
hidden behind a paste of varying
thickness, which not only destroys the
appearance, but also affects the wear
ing quality of the goods. This trou-
BILE can be entirely overcome by using
Defiance Starch, as it can be applied
much more thinly because of its great
er strength than other makes.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Don't wait and put off exercising until you get such shape that
VINE" you Int dumb bell carry baby boy the street get
PAIN IN your chest Don't wait until you get such shape that you
resemble bunch of bones rafting time pick
hg Don't wait until reduce yourself such shape that you
are unable to take deep breath without coughing the under
aK Will do all the shaping himself far you concerned
Get bunch of neghbor and empty loprefer
ABLY on empty omachs tooand play ball If your pals
street are too fat dgne ome day you might help dig their ae
JON the kids Play the used to play when young
ster You probably will be the distinction of batting first and if
the ball and only with the three tmedon
mind that You did doubt dconnec that has been
joints for long time.
Later when get your batting back again and able
to hit the ball. will of have when doing this
you will without doubt remind the ds" of that the
havesbut don't mind it. You will be able French leave of all
physics
Your turn out in the field will not be strenuous but will greatly
benefit You will be standing with your hands your hips and yell
"Aw hit the bacome do something Scientists this is
the correct attitude for deep breathing exercises After you through
good BATH rub down with the liberal of alphabetically not
internay-it will make you feel like a
Remember hours exercise in the equivalent to half
dozen indoors
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Chambsrlain's DC Pure Extracts, and Mani
mas Pure Phosphate Baking Powder
are Pure and Unadulterated, containing only
those substances recognized and endorsed by
the u. s. Government. At all Grocers. y. n
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
AJAX Your Druggist for Aliens Foot-Eass.

ct tried ALIENS FOOT-EASE recent
ly, and have just bought another supply.
1t has cured my corns, and the hot, burn
ing and itching sensation in my feet which
was almost unbearable, and I would not
be without It now.-Mrs. w. ]. Walker,
Camden, N. j." Sold by all Druggists, 25c.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
DELIGHTFULLY."- So,

81 never liked Shakespeare until
saw you play Hamlet
And you like 1t now?"
You bet l do"
And why do you like Shakespeare
after seeing me in 'Hamlet?'"
Shakespeare is SO different"
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Earthquake Frightens Mexloans.

Mexico City, Mex.--Acapulc felt an
other severe earthquake shock, &C.
cording to reports reaching this city.
The people were greatly frightened,
but there was no loss Of life or great
property damage.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
His CoIors.

What are your sons college col
ors?"
We'll" answered Farmer Corntos.
sci, Josh has figured so strong in
hazing and football, l should say they
must be black and blue"
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Well, What2
Pal"

Td9
Johnny, leave me alone and don't
ask me another question:"
Jaw, jest one more an then I'll
keep still"
We'll, what is it,"
What relation is a cousin german
to a Dutch uncle ?"-CleVeland Leader.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
rvIlIa Wrlaht eoea . Europe.

Dayton, o.orville and Katherine
Wright left here 70 rNew York,
whence they win sail for Europe in
few days. Their intended departure
was kept a secret and but few were
At the station when they left.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
ProNidentiaI.

Mother-Why should we make Viii.
lie a doctor when there are so many
new doctors every year?
Father-But think of all the new
ailments!
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

DR.. Juan Guiteras, head Of the sani'
tary department in Cuba, reported to
have resigned, has decided to retain
his position.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

In the list of big sea powers Austria
Hungary has hitherto cut but small fig
ure and yet within the near future the
Austrian navy will be extremely form-
dable If present plans go through, by
the close of 1912 the Austrian fighting
force at sea will include seven of the
swiftest and most powerful battleships in
the world. She has now three battleships
of 10000 tons each, speedy and heavily
armed; three smaller ships of $500 tons,
and three coast defense vessels of 5000
tons, besides armored cruisers carrying
heavy batteries for their size. Then she
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
An Aruive Cowherd,

Argus was Boosting of his 100 eyes.
Think of putting on so pairs of
goggles when you want to motor!" we
cried.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Iertie-Thank heaven we have met!
A Realist.

A Reallst,
81 am a great believer in realism, f."
remarked the poet.
"Yes?" we queried with a rising in.
Election, thereby giving him the desired
opening.
81 sometimes carry my ideas of
realism to a ridiculous extreme" con-
tinued the poet
Indeed" we exclaimed namely,
somewhat impatient to reach the point
of his witticism.
Yes, continued the poet, "the other
day wrote a sonnet to the gas com.
pany and purposely made the meter
defective"
At this point we tainted.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

F.. Just about month ago, while going
aboard the steamer that was to bring me
back from England to the United States,
l was witness to one of the saddest scenes
that ever came under my observation.
: 1t was the saying of farewell by scores
of fathers, mothers, brothers and sisters
who had assembled at the dock to see the
departure of their near kindred from their
homes in Ireland. These sorrowing ones
had come for last affectionate embrace, a
last God bless you! as the loved ones they
might never more set eyes on were setting
foot on the big liner that was to bear them
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
OUGHT 70 Be.

rs the man you recommend to US
capable of good head work?"
We'll, he's a barber"
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
A Green One.

do you look for news of Towards
hunting trip in the sporting column"
mo, in the obituaries. Life.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

The mere fact that man doesn't
call you a liar is no reason that he
doesn't think you are one,
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
What is CastOria.

AST0RA is harmless substitute for OIL Paregor Drops
Soothing Sup& lis pleasant neither Opium Morphine
other Narcotic substance Its its guarantee degOys ays
FeVeshness cures Dah@a and Wind Collie relieves Teeng Troubles
Constipation and Elatuency It assmes regulates
and Bowels giving healthy and natural Sleep The Chs Panaceahe
Mothers Friend.
The Kind You Have Always Bought and which has been for
30 years. has borne the signature Of Cha Fletcher and has been made under
his personal supervision since its infancy Allow deceive you this
All OOuner limitations and uasgoOd" are Experiments tfe with
and ennger the health Infants and against Experiment.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Is Your Health
Worth Toe?

That's what it costs to get a-week's
treatment-of CASCARETS. They
do more for you than any medicine
on Earth. Sickness generally shows
and starts first in the Bowels and
Liver; CASCARETS cure these ills.
It's so easy to try-why not start to-
night and have help IN the morning.
cAsCARETs roc a box for . weeks 50
treatment, all druggists. Biggest seller
In the world Million boxes a month";
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
LIES Unequal Combat.

You, river, are contending with
the ocean.--Latin.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Too many men try to build sky
scraper on a one-story foundation.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

Many who used to smoke l0c cigars are now
sD,SSing Lewis Single Binder straight Sc.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
Helpful
Exercise
Office Man
Should Get Out
i'm Open Air
By A. E. KRUGER

lie NEXT day that along with its bamy spring breezes
get out and do exercising stunts Fresh air will make
your muscles expand and will give your thinking machinery
better and clearer money making ideas.
This idea that you haven't time is all 'bosh" Some day.
when it's too late you will have to take lots of
producing time packing your furniture and seek to regain
your health in strange part of the country under orders
from the "M d. and under heavy handicap, too run
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19
eettIna at the Root.

Fair Patient-oh, doctor, Pm posi-
lively all run down and Pm so miser-
able, have that tired feeling all the
time.
Physician-No doubt. Let me see
your tongue.--Cleveland Leader.
Mexico Missouri message., 1909-08-19

All a Matter Of Comparison.
In blind mans land one-eyed MAJ
Is celebrity Baltimore Sun.
Arizona republican., 1909-12-31
MUNICIPAL OWNERSHIP
 OF STREET CAR LINE
VOTED YESTERDAY BY CITIZENS
 OF SAN FRANCISCO
At the Third Trial the Geary Stree,
 Road Proposition Was Accepted

San Francisco. Dec. 30.-By a mar gin of 2,i65 votes over the necessary twO-thirds majority. the voters de- clared today fo- municipal ownership in .he operation of the Geary street Railroad and it's extension to the Ferry building and west 10 the ocean shore. The proposal has been rejected thre,, times in the last five years.
 The total vote was 43.0Sl. the great est ever turned out for a special elsc- ton. The campaign for and against municipal street railroads was marked by iEe unusual efforts on the part of friends and enemies of the plan.
 The press vas divided in opinion. and exchanged editorial thrusts with all the littcrness Of q general election CngaGern"ut. The bill boards ard dead walls of the city have been pas cred for months with posters.
 .,.r f;.aTy greet road IS ne of the "i.iest lines in the ci.y and was cen siructcd when San Francisco WAS famous for is cable cor service.
Arizona republican., 1909-12-31
THE TAFT MONOPOLY
 OF NATIONAL LEAGUE THE WIFE OF CHARLES p. a
 HEAVY HOLDER. Her Latest Acquisition the Philadel-
 phia Grounds.

Cincinnati. Dec. 30-Assuming that Mrs. Annie Taft. her husband, Charles P. Taft and Charles Murphy, are in terested in more than one club of the National league. it is announced that they will be expected by at least a faction of the league to dispose of their holdings in either the Chicago or the Philadelphia clubs prior to the opening of the baseball season.
 Commenting upon Mrs. Tafts pur- chase of the grounds of the Philadel- phia club, August Hermann. presi- dent of the National Baseball commis- sion, said: II knew several days ago that such a step would be taken. There is at present no rule in the National league which prevents any one from owning stock in two clubs. but I think that if Messrs. Taft and Murphy don't sell the Philadelphia club before the opening of the 1910 season they will be asked to do so.
 ''I believe that Mrs. Taft purchased the Philadelphia grounds as an invest ment and intends to lease the grounds to the parties to whom the club is sold
 Neither Mir nor Mrs. Taft could be seen tonight but the opinion is eX- pressed by baseball experts that no serious controversy will arise.
Arizona republican., 1909-12-31
TWIN CITY MAYORS
 ADDRESS PRESIDENT
ASKING INTERVENTION IN THE
 ENVIRONMENTS STRIKE
The Appeal Made On the Request or
 Labor Organizations

Minneapolis. Dec. 30.-Mayor James Haines today asked President Taft to intervene in the switchmen's strike
 He sent the president the follow ing message: The continuation of the switchmen's strike in this sec tion is highly injurious. not only to the interested parties. but also to the general public. Much loss and suf- fering have occurred. and this will be greatly increased unless an early set tlement is effected. I trust you will lend your official influence towards a settlement"
 Knapp. chairman of the lnterstate Comemrce commission and Charles Neill. United States commissioner of labor
 Mayor Haines decided to send the messages after q prolonged confer ence with James Kelly. president of the freight handlers and railway clerks union. and Thomas Van Lear. division organizer of the machinists union. A similar request will be made by Mayor Lawler. of St. Paul, it is said
 President Taft will meet H. E. Perham. chairman of the railway de- partment of the American Federa- ton of Labor. and Messrs. Knapp and Neill at Washington on Friday.