davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-07-21
WISDOM.

w IsDOM is variable term. To the
w boy it means a knowledge of the
batting averages of every big league base
ball player
To the young man it means what he
has just acquired ut college
To the woman it means knowing just
what the children are going to have next
and how to cure it.
To the voting public it means the
six-syllablcd words that the candidate has
just fed them.
To the college professor 1T means what.
ever is contained in books.
To the gay young man 1t means what
ever is forbidden in life
To the girl it means Harry or Jim or
To the old man it means knowing
things before it is too late to do them
CURT CONCLUSIONS.
The only difference between chas
ing rainbows and political jobs, is
the fact that there is no pot of gold
at the end of the latter.
Ii wishes were automobiles whole
lot of beggars would be walking.
A man who can use all the slang
of the day as fast as he hears it, is
as smart as parrot or phono-
graph.
The eyes may be the windows Of
the soul, but it isn't the good peo-
Pile who have the stained glass win
dows.
One Of the sorrows we all endure
is the fact that the most interesting
people we know are generally too
busy to put their feet up and talk
with us for an hour at a time.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-07-21

being the hardest job. They set the ta-
bles and clear away the ruin afterward.
The two duties of man at a picnic are
to carry the lunch baskets and to put up
the hammocks in such way as to cause
the most excitement to the occupants. A
picnic can be heard at very great dis
tance by the groans of the men who are
performing these duties.
Picnics begin to appear sporadically in
June. and reach their greatest severity
in August. When the epidemic is at
its height. healthy person may have as
many as six picnics a week and vet
survive. y man who is afflicted with
picnics can be distinguished from the
fact that one shoulder is higher than
the other by a continual nervous slapping
of various parts of the body, and by the
fact that he sits down very cautiously,
as if expecting that whatever he Is sit
ting down in will give way and allow
him to continue to the earth with terrific
velocity.
Picnics may be complicated by base
ball, swimming. apple stealing, moon
light and children. in which case the
consequences are often very serious. Since
the automobile has become popular, pic
mics have been less severe because the
victim is now able to come out of it In
about one-quarter of the time.
II, HE steamer Kaisern Auguste Victoria
of Hamburg American line, now has
Il fine garden on her upper deck. in which
are grown lettuce, mushrooms and straw
berries. If this custom spreads among
the eviathans of the yeasty deep. we
may expect some day to read the follow
ing:
Last night in dense fog the steamer
Riproaria struck the steamer kurfurst
Adolphus Gutenberg Won Hoch der l>aiser
between the melon patch ana the sweet
pea bed, ripping out several plates and
sinking the ship in 1000 fathoms of
water The Kurfurst. Etc. s, gardeners say
crops will be total failure this year"
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-07-21
HEROES WHO RETURNED,

G OCRATES had made himself so dis
y agreeable over the tariff that it was
felt necessary to get him out of the way
Bring on your hemloek," he exclaimed
firmly.
nonsense" they sneered, as they nom
mated him for vice president, we'd
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-07-21
BY GEO. FIT C H
rather bury you alive"

Hendrick Hudson revisited the Island
of Manhattan and was much taken with
it.
"Ill give you $40 for it, he declared
Can't be DONE said the owner. But
you can rent nice alderman for half an
hour for that price,
After Caesar had spent week
around Washington with the boys. he
was offered kingly crown.
mo thanks" he said. politely, pushing
it away from him. I'D rather run the
country
Saying which he announced himself a
candidate for speaker
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1909-07-21

Now the lover, meath the roses,
Clasps and suffers and proposes
Moons about, his duties sighting;
Puts his passion into writing.
Which, when he has failed to get her,
He fills with phrases grandly swelling
Though little warped in spelling.
Love in cottages he praises
On ten plunks week-with raises.
What's the reason?
Silly season.
Now TO Looney Park we amble;
Down the bump-the- bumps we ramble,
SPRAYING with alarming wriggles
While the crowd with pleasure giggles.
Now re rolled and tossed and tumbled;
Over screamic railways rumbled.
Wierdly, wildly. swiftly, madly,
For which trouble we pay gladly.
Not to love it would be treason.
What's the reason?
Silly season.
Now the maid who, in the winter
Wouldn't for her life begin ter
Show her ankles, paddles gaily
In the rolling surf twice daily.
While for two short weeks we tarry
At the seashore millionairy,
Very rich and very snifty,
Spending all our savings thrifty,
Made by eating bread with cheese on
What's the reason?
Silly season.
Now upon the sticky bleachers,
Widely open as to features,
For our team we whoop and sputter,
Root and scream and plead and mutter,
Tossing hats to thunder madly;
Tearing hair and garments sadly,
As if life and love depended
On the way the durn game ended
All the nation has a wheeze on.
What's the reason?
Silly season.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
HoLLENE ITEMS.

The early sowing of wheat is up
nicely.
Ben Crawford sold a horse to l.. s.
Beckley this week.
Bob Stinson and Jessie Beck Of
Grady, were in l~lollene Thursday.
Wheat sowing and feed cutting is
the order Of the day o in these parts,
Green Henry has sold his stock of
groceries, feed aud hardware to \. VI.
Harris and Lloyd Trent.
o. j. Chamberlain and Jim Harrison,
two of Hollene's notorious bachelors,
have gone TO Clovis to work.
The cool weather we are having now
reminds the people of winter time aud
several are hustling out to the Brakes
for wood.
Mr.. Griffith who has been digging
for water and dug three dry holes, has
finally succeeded with the fourth one,
lie moved over on the Northeast cor.
ner and dug.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
HINTS TO THE HOUSEWIFE, FROM
EXCHANGE.

Appetizing Sandwiches:-Take made
mustard and stir into il as much grated
cheese Uarmesau preferrcd) M the
mustard will hold together. slice bread
thin; remove crust. Butter n slice, add
the cheese mixture, place unbuttered
slice on top and press together, and
you II he pleased with the result,
California drop cnkcs;-One cup
sugar, two thirds cup molaSscs, one
half cup butter, one half cup milk, two
eggs, one cup r%aisins, n rounded tea
spoon soda, one teaspoon ginger, Que
teaspoon cinnamon, u half teaspoon
cloves, three and three fsurths cups
flour. Drop in ~spooufuls on well but
tered tins.
Oatmeal Grucl;-One half cup Of
thoroughly cooked oatmeal, u cup
boiling water or milk. Stir the oatmeal
into the liquid, beat thoroughly togeth.
or, season with a litrle salt, strain IL
desired and serve hot.
This is especially n%ourishing 10 con
valescents.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
Fake Fairs

There 3. q growing feeling all over
'hc rN.uJry, against the character Of
the alleged 90 fairs thar are used as
the pIcrcN' 10 milk the public Of its
money, under the plea Of "amuSe
mcuts,' The character Of the Ameri
can exhibition of other days, which in
cluded % display Of agricultural pro.
ducts, fruit, handiwork, and live stock,
has almost disappeared from the land.
aud Ia in place has GONE a collection
Of hoochcekoochee dances, and other
midway attractions which are any.
thing but ~elevating in their tone, ana
which fail utterly in the purpose for
which fairs are supposed to be held,
namely, 10 benefit the town and section,
and amuse aud interest the people, II
Is this tendency more than any thing
else which ruined the ~ Paso Carnival,
which has made the annual gatherings
a. several tuwns something to bee avoid.
ed. Any of those towns, the best Of
their class In the west, are capable Of
better things, but each year the shows
get o little bit ranker, so IL II keeps
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
Restraining Order Needed.

The Tenderfoot received an invita-
ton To attend the first annual Melon
Day AZ ~. sumner .Sunnyside, which
joyous event occurred Friday, but
needless 70 say he didn't go, lie il
alsc minded "a remark that there
should be some sort of a restraining
order against such promiscuous invi'
tations to newspaper men under pres
ent conditions. In the last two
months | have had bids TO meet Taft
M seven different cities, Ia see the
sights at Seattle, to whoop 'em up Tor
Henrik Hudson at New York, To attend
the San Antonio fair, to irrigate
with the Irrigation congress, and 80
many others that the notch stick Is
filled, | was compelled In light Of the
hard feelings that my presence NJ 9th.
or places would have caused II omit
ted at others, TO even stay away from
the Artesia Alfalfa festival. which new.
or before worked under such a handi
cap. for was there when IL was born
aud each time since up 20 the last one,
| wanted 10 be there this time, but
couldn't without making hard feelings
everywhere else that | had been In
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
PLAIN ITEMS.

Miss Mary Beckham visited her sis
ter Tuesday afternoon.
Chas. Hatfield made n Aging trip to
the county seat Monday.
DR.. W. NJ. Lancaster has n brother
visiting him from Texas.
Mrs. Eilc and daughter, Miss Amy,
called on Mrs. Petet Wednesday.
Merchant stevens made a trip to
Clovis after supplies for his store.
clyde Stanhcld passed through Plain
on route to his claim six miles west.
Mr.. aud Mrs. Shelby have come
home after being absent n few days.
Mrs. Peiet and Miss Bertha Snelson
were hauling wood one day last week.
MIR. Frakcs and family are among
those who went to Roswell sight see
ing.
Mrs. ". w. Water6eld visited with
Mrs. Chas. Hatfield Monday and Tues.
day.
Mr.. and Mrs England are stopping
at Mr.. Lairmore 5 while putting "
feed.
Mr. and Mrs. T.. q. Welch Of Tucum
carl, spent Thursday night at the Petet
home.
ElYl. A..a ,us4a Il. luaN vuaaL un.
will visit friends while stopping oi
his claim.
Mr.. j. u. Rhodes came out frou
Clovis Wednesday aud will remain al
indefinite time.
Messrs. Kile, Kile and family lief
for Roswell Monday after apples an,
to look over the country.
DIR. Lancaster called at the schoo
Thursday and v~accinated the childre.
against contagious diseases.
Mr., aud Mrs. l.. F. Studyvin opcne,
their doors aud entertained u humble
of their friends singing Sunday even
ing.
Word was received from Mr.. Maid
well that they had arrived at thei
journeys end all .. X. That bein
Altus, Okla.
MIR. Weaver, who committed on hi
claim abou, one year ago aud has bee
living in Texas since, came ia this wee
aud says New Mexico still looks goo
TO him.
Several of our ncighbors got excite
the other morning and thought the
heard the train whistle but it was all
mistake, just Mr.. Bankers Burro'
braying.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
NEW LAW.
Continued from frs, page }

f%ornia, aud is open 10 those only who
were born on New Mexico soil. Pre-
sumably It's slogan is TO be New Mex.
leo for New McNicans,' though II is
not said that the society will engage
in politics rs the California a%ssocia'
ton has done so miny times. There
can be no question Of the right OF
the gentlemen Interested 90 boost he.
Naive Sons, but there is much
doubt Of its wisdom In n general way
Exclusive organizations are ~, nriahly
misunderstood, uo matter how whole
tome their purpose may be. The pop
ulntion Of New Mexico Is essentially
cosmopolitan. II Is contributed TO by
the whole world The number who
have been born on our soil is compare
lively limited. To limit u terri
torial patriotic society to that num-
her gives Il strong tang ~ snobbery
that doesp Z set we'll with the average
New Mexican who has been confirmed
iu the belief that any man H u good
New Mexican. vl1 has lived IA the
territory lopg enough 10 vote. and has
thc other qualification. Of an cl"ctor.
Naturally they will look with impious
ewes upon the Native Sons of New
Mexico, and they can not really be
blamed New Mexico j. big enough
for all sorts of societies that people
want To amusc themselves with. but It
will be a little hard 60 make them see
II.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09

yited. There really ought TO be n re
straining order against 50 many jour.
n%alistic invitations. The distances are
invariably too far to make the walk
possible. a fellow wants to 90 To all
Of them. aud IL he picks out the near
est aud goes there, impious pups else
who're are more than apt 10 have .
crouch over IL. In such n dilemma,
really the only safe curse is to stay
NJ home. OF course paying railroad
fare is out Of the question, except in
the case of the Pecos Valley Editorial
a].socinti ION. aud in that event, the money
Used j. really Gn investment
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
Decline of the Burro

The recent snlr Of the hurro under
tho pound ordinance. 3D.. another proof Of
the DEPTHS TO which the former great
dcyrloper of the y,., has fallen. TO
boz arrested fo, ,~agrtucc and sold for
"a few cents. &c. ..r rruwuiug lpuumi,v
of the little bcn., who led the pioneers
loo the mountain, anI helped 10 c]i,tli1c
80 great - TERRITORY IN the carly DAYS.
I'm fact the lot Of the hurro IL hard
these DAYS. with a pedigree ~ long
"a. the list of reasons for statehood, a
blood unsullied for centuries, he is
reduced to q love. of hauling mes
quite for the NpNiraus and being n
U%lavthing for the children In spite
of the fact that uuc Of BIZ. ancestors
: carried the iuf..' 'Nri.' into Egypt,
aud 10 thi, day U. has the mark OF the
cross upon hi. shoulders, he is now
the chief friend Di the ,amalc man
anl 90 bupclr,, nar,a.t of the brute
.rrafiou.. lu Dis 'Iy. be- bore million,
iu treasure out OF the mountains of
fUr west and -l..UNy-r. aud vet be- can
now Ice bought i.r 70 paitry SIX bits
That is surely u bad come down for
au individual with such arlstocratic
lineage. II j. h.r % former million.
ui.c getting his .I..IInuod from free
lunch counters, and being classed a.
q yagrant. Fortunately for him. the
hurrO il not particular IN his diet, II
1t Is only n matter Of "a few mesquite
leaves, aud so on, IL j, all the same
20 him, aud he seems 20 thrive ms well
pu ,rorus ~ %lIiHlfa. Like the Jack
rabbit, he is superior to such a com
mon place thing as grub. Some peO.
pie have tried to acquire the same
faculty, but u invariably results in the
abdomen sticking to the backbone aud
other distressing symptoms that in.
,uriuhly move to soulful effort. Some.
time. such % power would come in
mighty handy, but It d, peculiar only
'o 'hp Iufru. and 10 no other form of
InchG-.. n l. like some other of
hI. virtues. peculiar 20 the burro. lie
b.. the orIr 1nimal that Il. patient un.
der restraint. which will pull his end
of 'N. .| Hc tree ~, long 20. be- can
stand up. and who is patient under the
| hurdc-, master. lie never complains,
aud vl.I, hr, voice Is not fitted for
grand opera. there is a lot, more music
iu IT. than the solos of many peoplo
who imagine they know how to sing
uudrr 900 circumstance hr Is A stole.
II is aid The same 10 him whether he
| huul- wood. or fattens ns IN. nam.
rcrri prf If AN urcbin. 4 carc.. ar A.,
club are alike to him. He take, hi.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09
NOTICE OF PROOF OF WILL.
In the Probate Court In and for the
County Of Quay and Territory OF
New Mexico.
TO WHOM 1T MAY CONCERN

Notice IL hereby given that there was
hled In the Office Of the Probate Clerk
on the 2sth day Of September, 1909,
the last will and testament Of Fred.
erick Jahns, deceased, and said will Is
to be approved on the LIST day Of No.
vember, 1909, and all parties interest.
cd are hereby notified Of the said time
herein axed for the proof OF said will,
Given under my hand and seal Of
Office this the Goth day Of September,
1909.
IsEALl n. p. DoNoHoo,
iO.2.5t. Probate Clerk, Quay
County, N. N.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1909-10-09

News, | am now in New York buy
ing our second stock of goods for
this season. thought | bought a
plenty when here in August, but our
prices are so attractive and our trade
is increasing so rapidly that another
fall stock will be needed.
have struck the market just
right. At this season the whole
salers heavy selling is over and they
have a great many small lots from
various lines hat they are anxious
to close out at almost any price.
They can't catalogue them or give
them to the men on the road because
they are too small. SO when a pos
sible purchaser comes in they make
prices hat move the goods at once.
have picked up about $4,000 worth
of such bargains from all lines and
there will be great "doings" at T.
A. Muirhead & Co.'S. when these
purchases arrive.
Want to make special mention
of Ladies Coat Suits worth $40. to
SIS. that we will sell at $3.50 to
$3.50; Ladies' Rubberized Silk and
Rubberized Mohair Coats at $3.50
and $1,000, worth at least one-third
more. Boys Knee Suits, Youths
Long Pants Suits, Mems Suits, etc.
We are going to have a lot of Boys
Short Overcoats, for ages 3 to 8,
worth So. to $3.50, that we are 60
ing to sell for $1.OO. Mems Suits
worth $4,000 for $11.9O. Mems
Suits worth $1,000 at $500. Mems
Soft Collar Shirts worth $1.5O at
$1.OO. Mems Wool Shirts worth
$50 to $3.50 at $1.OO, and hum
dreds of other things for every men,
Der of the family at just as great
Saving. Not through buying yet and
there is no telling what will show up
on the Bargain Counter when the
time co.nes | have determined to
hold the biggest Bargain Jubelee in
our history about the time the Fair
opens and you may depend upon it.
"We Never Disappoint"
With thanks to all for past pat
ronage and hoping to e you at our
our Big Harvest Sale, | am,
Yours very truly,
T. A. MUIRHEAD.
Martinsburg statesman-democrat. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1906-1921, 1909-02-26
PUBLIC SALE
OF Valuable
Personal Property

The home farm Of my father VIII be sold on
March 9TH and having no farm for this year,
will sell al my home miles west of Hedgesyiue'
Martinsburg statesman-democrat. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1906-1921, 1909-02-26
CONSUMPTION
COST BILLION
This the Annual Loss 10 the Naihn, SAY Erporls
al The tuberculosis Congress-

According TO Prof. Irving Fisher Of Yale,
the Great White Plague costs over oas
billion dollars year. He estimates that
consumption kills 1913, 900 every year In the
United States. This Is equal 10 the deaths
from typhoid feyee .seaflst fegerf diph-
liberia, appendicitis, meningitis, diabetes.
smallpox, and cancer oil put together.
Consumption Is undoubtedly infectious
and like Pneumonia and biphtheria IL
usually contracted In winter when closed
doors and windows cause impure air Care
full ventilation and the use OF "A reliable
disinfectant are the best representatives..
The last thing at night POUR into the traps
of the closets, wash-basins, sinks, etc.,
little Patts Chlorides. All suspected
places should he freely sprir kled With q
mixture OF ono "a part Platt's Chiorides
and ten (i0) parts Of water. platt's Chic
rides is an odorless, eoloriess liquid disin-
fecsant which destroys foul doors and
disease germs. II il sold everywhere in
full quart bottles, and is prepared only by
henry b. Plat. A Cliff St., New York
Martinsburg statesman-democrat. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1906-1921, 1909-02-26

The passags by the LEGISLATURE OF the
bill prohibiting tho sale Of mercaan-
disc ~ bulk In fraud Of creditors, 10
highly pleasing 10 all the local mer-
chants and manufacturer, as we'll as
TO the members OF the State board Of
trade. Laws similar to this are In OPP
GRAFTON in IS States Of the Union, and
West Virginia by adopting this law Is
simply following in the footsteps Of
her more progressive sisters, and will
save her citizens engaged in meroan-
tile Or manufacturing pursuits thous-
ands OF dollars.
The fnll text Of the baik-sales dill IL
as follows.
"a bill to prohibit the sale of mer-
chandise in bulk In fraud OF red
itors.
"Ssc. THE sale in bulk Of any
part or the whole of stock OF mer-
chandlse otherwise than 10 the ordf
nary course of trade and Ia the regular
and usual prosecution OF the sellers
business shall be fraudulent and void
rs against tho creditors OF the seller
unless the seller and purchaser at
least FIVE days before the sale make
written statement snowlng the naturc
aud character Of the sale and property
TO bv sold and the prics to be paid
therefor, ana unless the purchaser dos
mf ads aud reselses fson the seller a
written list az names and addresses Of
creditors ei the selles, with THE amonnt
OF Indebtedness dae Of owing 10 each
and certified bv % seller under oath
TO os to tia best Of ais knowledge and
belief full accurate and complete lEst
of his creditors aud III hta indebte a.
ness; and unless the purchaser shall
At least live days heforc taking possess
sion Of sucu merchandise or paying
therefor notify personally or by regis-
tered mall every creditor whose name
and a9dress II stated III said list !of the
proposed saic and Of tbs price, terms
and conditions theveof,
"sec. g Sellers aud purchasers un-
der this aet shall include corporate M,
associations, partnerships aad indi-
vldualas tut uothing contained il this
act shall apply 70 safes by executors,
administrators, receivers, assigneea
under voluntary assignment for the
benefit Of creditors, trustees In bank
auptcy, or by aay public officers uad er
judicial process.
Martinsburg statesman-democrat. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1906-1921, 1909-02-26

Augustus 4. Busch, who resently
purchased the old home of General
Ulysses s. Grant on the Gravois road !,
st. Louis county, Mo-, AMI known
Throughout the coanty ~ tina ssGrant
Farm, has converted 1t into mode
gane preserve. He has purchased the
old home Of the General, the famo N
log cabin, which, after being knocked
down and carried around the country
for exhibition, has been returned to It's
former site and occupies position on
the farm overlooking the Gravois road !.
1t will be thrown open to the public
as museum. 1t is the intention OF
Mr.. Busch to collect an many Grant
relics as possible and restore them to
the cabin. The cabin itself Is intact and
Just as General Grant left 1t, except
that few logs have been cut out Of an
inside partition. The old ssspring
house, where the General kept his
butter, eggs, milk and, It Is rumored
his liquor, which was said to be the
best found In the State, has been pre-
served in its entirety. A fence Ut mus
ket barrels, which saw service In the
Civil War, surrounds the cabin. A vet
eran Who saw service under. Grant is
caretaker at the cabin.
Martinsburg statesman-democrat. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1906-1921, 1909-02-26
100 Bushels Corn
Hon hold and Kitchen Furniture
Terms

A credit of 10 months on all sums of $40 and
over purchaser % give note with good security
payable at any of the banks OF Martinsbufg
with interest from date, but ii paid at maturity
interest remitted. Onder $40 cash. No prop
erty to be removed until settled for
". A. Teadrick
Dodd h Hoffman, Auct