davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1909-06-05

was tossing out a cobblestone anchor.
Did l swim? / reckon! Swan like
a bullhead catfish. Ny big brother, Of
course, would have yanked me back
into the skiff il he'd seen that I was
drowning, but he didn't let me know
that. and so / just swan and swan
and swan like somebody that knew all
about 1t and like I'd seen the other
fellows swim. From what I've seen
since l became a swimming instructor
] know that it would be pretty risky
job to toss any nine-year-old girl into
the water and expect her to swim.
Il use the pole. belt and strap, OF
course. in teaching. I don't believe in
harness myself. but they insist upon
having 1t, and OF course / have to he
agreeable to their wishes In my
opinion. pupils can be much better
taught in water about up to their
shoulders and without any harness on
them at all. They gain more conf
dence that way. That's the way I
teach most of the boys. But the girls
and young women have all heard OF
the safety. as they call the pole and
belt and strap contraption, and they
all demand it. They not only demand
1t at first. but / have a hard job to
keep them from wearing it right
along. even when they're taking their
fnal lessons. Some girls will swim
like harbor seals as long as they know
Evening star., 1909-06-05

themselves. Don't try to make thatoboy
another you-one Of you will do.
John Jacob Astor's father wanted to
make a butcher Of his boy. but the COM
mercial instinct was strong enough In
him to make him run away from home
and come to America. The father OF
Daniel Webster determined that Daniel
should be a farmer He took the boy
out into the field and showed him how to
cut hay, but no matter how the father
fixed the scythe 1t did not hang to suit
Daniel, until the old man, in despair. ex-
claimed: Get out of the field and hang
that scythe to suit yourself"
Daniel, hanging the scythe on q tree,
said: There 1t hangs to suit me-"
Many of the worlds mest successful
men have failed in one or more pursuits
until they finally got on the right track.
Barnum failed in fourteen different occu-
pations before he discovered that he was
a born Snowman. Goldsmith failed as a
ply sician, but who else could have writ
ten THE Deserted Village? Cromwell
was farmer at forty and Grant tan:
ner at thirty-eiGht. Moody, an indiffer-
ent shoe salesman. became after middle
life the worlds greatest evangelist. No
man will ever do his best until he finds
his proper niche.
All callings in life are alike honorable.
if they are useful. l would rather have
my boy become a shoemaker and put
genius in his shoes than become a
preacher, preaching sermons that nobody
wants to hear.
Evening star., 1909-06-05
nnflG MI 1TNH

the swag, too, before his game waA
tumbled to, leaving behind him scores
of unfortunates, some Of whom already
had begun to live beyond their means
on the strength Of their great expecta-
tions in connection with the Brazilian
emerald beds
Not so many years ago. either. large.
bluff, loud-yoiced. hearty-seeming west
ern CRATER picked up something tidy in
the way of loot in Washington by raffiing
on an imaginary ranch, comprising
3.oo acres" which he owned" in
southern California This CRATER got
into the swim of men about town in
Washington by minging with lot OF
pokerish clubs. He always had plenty
OF money and spent 1t, was a good gam
bier, great drnker. garsantuan eater.
a sonorous swearer and a typical 'Slop-
err" somewhat after the Bret Harte type.
but filling to the eye and the magma
tion.
After he'd got acquainted with some
hundreds OF FOUNDERS, he let out the
plausible enough yarn. Inasmuch as the
east and little old Washington were GO
Ing to be good enough for him in the fu-
ture, and as he was tired of ranch life.
anyhow, he was going to rattle his ranch
off at S1OO shot. and 500 chances. He had
some beautiful pictures of the ranch and
the mellow old mission buildings on the
ranch, and some newspaper clippings
that really seemed to show that he own
ed the ranch.
1t became a sort of A bug with the
WOODY pals of the woody westerner to
fall for a chance or two in that ranch
every time the subject came up. and l
heard il stated on good authority that
this fellow with the ranch-raffiing
scheme had more than a fun book of
800 chances and the money for the same
In his nankeens when he disappeared
one day, leaving behind him a fine bunch
of braZen aha notes for his victimiZed
cronies. in which he quoted the maxim
that new ones wera born every minute
and that they never died, and rubbing
1t in in other less cleanly phrases.
CLARENCE l.. CULLEN.
Evening star., 1909-06-05

basket-orderer from the uplands. and
even a thousand doesn't go such a lons
distance when every quart costs ten dol
lars. and everybody within sound Of the
buyers voice is in on the opening. The
fool boy blew of all of the hangers-on OF
the camp to the ten-dolAr stuff until ht
was all in on the .ney thing. then he
went to his hotel and took a snooze over 1t.
He was a kid of twenty-one or so.
slender. smooth faced itnd boyish-looking,
and he was rigged out in toppy tenderfoot
raiment that was only allowed to get by
in Durango because its wearer was a
spender.
when the youngster woke up at the
finish Of his three-day whirl in Durango
he didn't have the price of an eye-opener.
much less of one of those baskets he had
been ordering so profusely. However, he
wasn't exactly the kind of a fool boy
who'd attempt to make borrow from the
people who had helped him to go broke.
He fixed himself out with shave and
hot towels, and turned up in the hotel
Office as spck and span as II he had an
other bundle the size of a horse collar to
blow in on his favorite prescription. 1t
was about o'clock at night when he ap-
peared in the hotel office.
- guess I'll see II can't make a
proper rap at a bank. he said to the hotel
clerk. Where's the nearest faro layout?'
Evening star., 1909-06-05

when couple OF men, brothers, were ar
rested in Washington charged with whole
sale swindling, with women chiefly for
their victims. in connection with fake
investment scheme.
And IL set me to thinking of some
unique swindling schemes that have been
pulled off in little old Washington and
some of its more credulous citizens within
comparatively recent years. One fellow
who came mighty nearly putting neat
one over on Washington only three years
ago was a Detroit crook who, after being
tied uc in the District tail for a little
while. finally was turned loose for the
reason that he had been grabbed before
he'd actually sprung his little money
gaining plan.
This tall. gangling, preacher-like chap
had made couple of visits to South
America. addressing his Investigations
particularly To Ecuador and the United
States Of Colombia. and when he struck
Washington early in 1905 he had the finest
assortment OF ornately stamped phony
concessions" all beautifully written out
i'm flowing Spanish. ever put on view in
the National Capital, where such docu-
Evening star., 1909-06-05

thought l just told you that / only made
that bet for fun, to see IL there was
going to be anything doing in the way
of luck for me-
AT this instant every man sitting
around the table was ready to drop to
the floor and flop low while the bullets
were flying. 1t looked like sure case
OF dead tenderfoot.
Upton studied the youngster intently
for a moment. his features working with
anger. The boy stood looking at him in
an innocent kind of a way. with his
hands thrust In his trousers pockets
After about thirty pretty quiet seconds
Of this Cpton's features creased into
grin.
Son. he said. amusedly. to the ten
derfoot you make a plumb hit with me-
Here, take this'-reaching into the money
drawer and pulling out five double ca
Sles-'and see what you can do with il
;up the street. and he handed the per-
fectly self-contained tenderfoot the hum
dred
THE tenderfoot accepted the coins with
murmured word of thanks for the loan
went up the street to another faro bank
won $500 inside of an hour returned
and paid back Upton the hundred. and
had that very evil proposition for a
stanch friend during the remainder Of
his stay in Durango"
Evening star., 1909-06-05
All Alike.

gTHE late Ethan Allen Hitchcock
] said a Washington diplomat, had
a trenchant, outspoken way with him.
Once, at a reception. i heard an inventor
describing in his presence new kind OF
warship.
"'This ship Of mine the inventor SAID.
is modelled on the duck
LIT flies, eh?' said Mr.. Hitchcock.
"'No, no: of course 1t doesn't fiy.' said
the inventor. impatiently. 1t isn't an
aeroplane. It's ship But 1t gets over
the water like a duck.
Suppose an enemy fires at it, said
Mr. Hitchcock.
Then it dives like duck. replied the
inventor
Right out Of sight?' said Mr.. Hitch
cock.
Right down to the bottom said the
inventor proudly.
.Humph.' said Mr.. Hitchcock. Seems
a good deal like those we have already.
doesn't it,"
Evening star., 1909-06-05

ONT bend your design where
your genius does not incline
Emerson wisely says: THE
crowning fortune Of a man is to
be born with a bias to some
pursuit which finds him in employment
and happiness" No man can struggle
VIGOROUSLY against his own character,
and one of the very first lessons of life
is to learn what groove we are intended
to fill.
Evidences of ones right calling Will
manifest themselves early in life. Han
DEL the famous composer. whose father
was a physician, was intended for the
profession of law, and the father did all
he could to discourage the boys fond
ness for music; but he got an old spinet
and practiced on it secretly dn hay loft
He produced an opera before he was M
teen.
Galileo. who discovered the principle of
the pendulum at eighteen and invented
both the microscope and telescope, was
set apart by his parents for physician :;
but wherf compelled to study physiology
he would hide his Euclid and secretly
work out difficult problems.
1t is serious mistake for parents to
wish their sons to be reproductions of
Evening star., 1909-06-05

them on their second or third visit, by
suddenly conducting them to room
where he had his emerald and stourmaline
specimens spread out In artistic disarray
on a table having coyerlet OF white
velvet.
The sight Of the emerald and tourmaline
specimens banked around on the white
velvet was beautiful in it's barbaric law
ishness. and 1t, Of course, evoked instant
inquiries as to where the specimens came
from. The host told the inquirers with
manifest reluctance. He'd picked up
the emeralds-he told them that the
whole pile was composed OF emeralds, and
got away with II every time-on that
emerald bed he'd staked out for himself
down in Brazil. and, as the price of f1ne
emeralds was about three times that of
diamonds. why, he had billions in sight;
and SO on.
He was organizing a little company.
not too heavily capitalized-only 100000
TO start work at the emerald beds He
didn't want many people in on the thing.
1t was going to be pretty close corpo-
ration, but-well, the capital stock was
pretty nigh all paid in. but he had a
few shares left for S. per share.
This fellow sold many thousands of
dollars worth Of shares of stock in this
purely imaginary emerald proposition
without the least bother When somebody
questioned whether the green stones were
sure-enough emeralds he handed his Wis
itors specimens from the riot OF green
stones lying on the white velvet coveriet
and invited them to take the specimens
to their jewelers. and obtain the jewelers.
opinions as to whether the stones were
uncut emeradls or not. He was careful,
of course, to pick up the genuine emer-
aids from amid the heap OF tourmalines
when he performed this stunt. When the
people sent on this quest TO their jewelers.
with the emeralds were told by the gem
experts that the specimens were fine and
rare examples of the green gem the
emerald man had TO put in overtime in
receiving the Washington folks who'd
heard about the great thing In emeralds
and who wanted stock.
This cheerful worker got away with
Evening star., 1909-06-05
WASHINGTON PEOPLE "FA1L" FOR ALL SORTS OF ODD sw1DLEs

infallibly grow into steam yachts and
country villas in very brief space OF
time, and thus get their games going.
The first victims ''let in on the ground
to the sacrifice, and thus was formed the
profitable group of investors.
A typical case was that of a chap who
did fine thing of it for himself. about
fine rubber plantation in Chiapas, Mexico.
OF which he didn't own clod and with
which he had nothing whatever to do.
This one installed himself In hlgh-
grade boarding house in the northwest
section Of Washington and proceeded to
get acquainted with the folks of the
neighborhood. One of his best equipments
toward this end was cleverly assumed
southern way Of speaking.
Within a couple of months this cheer
full worker knew everybody for blocks
around the boarding house. He didn't say
q word to any of them about rubber for a
long time. Then he took two or three OF
the men folk into his confidence as to that
proposition. He didn't ask them to buy
anything. He simply told them what
had an ample bundle Of yellow money
somewhere in his clothes and a knack
of flashing the roll In wholly unosten-
tatious way.
He rugged matters SO that they simply
had to ask him as to the nature and de-
tails Of his fine snap. and then he told
en- Rubber plantation in Chiapas, Mex
ico-ever so many tens OF thousands of
acres, all trees actually producing rubber.
He was acquiring some more tens Of
thousands of acres. however. right along
side of those already yielding vast quanti-
ties of rubber. and had already organized
company to take over those new acres
and finance the working of the new sec
tion. He discoursed expansivey and
Slowingly on how much money per acre
rubber trees produce.
He showed the first two or three a
book of photographs Of the Chiapas rub
per plantation. showing tas he said) his
own splendid hacienda right in the mid
die Of ii. surrounded by palms. and Pic
Evening star., 1909-06-05

ments are by no means out OF the or
dinary.
concessions was enough to convince
anybody possessed of sufficient magma
ton that the holder of them had just
about nabbed first chance at everything
of value in Ecuador and Colombia: hum
dreds of square miles Of gold fields Che
didn't get first whack at mere mines. but
whole ''telds'o. silver fields, copper
fields emerald beds. hundreds OF thou
sands of acres of rubber plantations In
full bearing. vast deposits of phosphates
and nitrateS, whole provinces of oil that
was only a couple of feet beneath the
topSoil, and so on.
This young Detroiter. who claimed to be
4 Harvard graduate, lawyer. a chemist
to make a cleanup In Washington when
he happened to butt into the one sus-
picious man who had him nabbed. He
had even organized little exchange
bank" of his own In Washington. con-
sisting OF a table. q couple of chairs and
some neat rubber stamps for the stamp
ing of the word accepted" on drafts,
with his wife to act his draft stamper
during his absence: and he was very busy
telling a lot OF likely Washington folks
all about these good South American
things OF his when he slipped the cog that
landed him In JAIL
This one got caught. Getting caught.
however, Is something that by no means
is the common fate OF the large and in
genious tribe Of concession" holders who
operate in Washington from time to time
Quite a few OF them get away with more
or less swag
The really smart crooks who In former
years have preyed upon the Washington
population through the medium Of fake
investment enterprises have done their
work without any blare of trumpets
whatever They would install themselves
in quiet hotels or fashionable boarding
houses. and. being good mixers and hand
shakers. contrive TO get on terms with
plenty of potential victims. to whom
they'd parade their good things in con-
.dentiaI sort of way. SHOW them how
the investment of few thousands would
Evening star., 1909-06-05
NM ENIrEs

We'll. there's Pack Upton's across the
way said the clerk. Pack runs square
game. but you don't want to get tangled
up none with Pack or he's liable to make
a lunch of you
Bad. eh?' said the tenderfoot.
"'Pizen," said the clerk. Real pizen.
"'Oh. WELL" said the tenderfoot. maybe
he's not 80 bad and he strolled over the
way to Upton's game. He had never
been in there before, and Upton had never
clapped an eye upon him.
when he walked in. besides the six or
seven players sitting around the table at
which Upton was dealing. there were half
a dozen men standing behind the chairs
dropping bets down on occasional cards
they liked. Once in a while, when these
ISLANDERS couldn't reach the card they
wanted to put their gold on. they'd call
out in a low tone to Upton, Pack. just
put marker on such and such a card for
me- and If they lost they'd toss the gilt
over to Upton. None of them failed,
either to have the coin to toss over.
THE tenderfoot walked up behind the
crowd Of men standing back of the
chairs and peered over the shoulders OF
one Of them in order to have look at
the case keeping of the chap sitting down
in front Of him.
HE studied the list for a moment or
SO, and then he looked straight at Up
Evening star., 1909-06-05

that the schemer didn't own the whole
works.
1t was q bold move: but IT went through
the doctor returned to Washington. and
the doctor went through the neighborhood
telling everybody what he had seen, what
a superb outfit the Cilapas plantation
was, what a fine time he'd had at the
Which. Of course. made it mighty soft
for the rubber man. They stormed his
doors to buy stock at S. and s. per share
and he swan on the top crest of the
money tide for several months.
Then. having cleaned up. he just went
away from Washington, and nobody has
seen or heard from him since. The bub-
BILE didn't explode till after he had left.
embellshed stock certificates found out
then that the plantation the doctor man
had been shown around in Chiapas be-
longed to a Mexican gentleman who had
never set foot in the United States. The
beauty Of this swindlers method was
that everything he took in was pure vel
vet except for the cost OF having the
pretty stock certificates printed. He
didn't have to spend a nickel for adver-
tising or such things as that.
Winning ways got It. too. for another
adept neighborhood worker who pulled up
in Washington about ten years ago with
emeralds which he said he had picked
up on an immense emerald claim he
had staked out for himself in Brazil. and
he had. besides, about half ton of beau
tiful specimens OF tourmaline. which re-
sembles the emerald closely in the uncut
state.
This adept who was an Irishman with
a superb brogue, but who could talk the
best of Spanish with such Latin -Ameri-
can legation attaches as he happened to
meet in Washington. took a handsome
apartment in one of the uptown apart
ment hotels Of Washington. furnished 1t
splendidly and proceeded to get acquaint-
ed with folks in very much the same
manner as the man with the fake rubber
plantation. When folks visited him at his
apartment he had q way Of dazzling
Evening star., 1909-06-05

sance, and he never has belonged and
never will.
His whole grueling method Is based
upon the insane presumption that his
own bunch of faxheads forms the only
juvenile bevy that ever appeared upon
this planet.
'Mulhalrs statistics, giving the exact
and continents, can't feaze him q little
bit
He knows positively that his personally
conducted outfit of goo-gooers comprises
the only youthful coterie that ever hap.
pened along in the worlds history.
Now. it wouldn't hurt or irk or cark
SO much If he just knew this and kept
right on knowing 1t. and let it go at that
IF he'd only keep this serene belief to
himself and walk through the world grim
ming simianishly over his huge bulge on
the rest Of the earth's population there'd
be fewer good citizens and taxpayers
running amuck, and there'd be rapid
Evening star., 1909-06-05
RTE ---1 III TnN

ton, who was halted with his finger on
the slip-out card, waiting for all bets to
be laid down.
Just stick marker on the ace, open.
for a hundred for me. will YOU? the ten
derfoot said to Upton.
Upton looked up at the youngster.
whose face was entirely new to him.
and nodded. He put the marker on the
ace open. The ace came out a loser.
The tenderfoot didn't bat an eye.
BY jove.' he said coolly yawning and
stretching his arms. luck sure is against
me. I can't even win a bet when I
make one for fun
Upton looked up at the lad peculiarly,
apparently doubling whether the tender
foot was fooling or in earnest
'How's that?' he inquired
4 say said the tenderfoot, just as
if he were talking about the weather,
that even when l make a little bet for
fun I can't seem to get anything
'Cpton's face darkened. and the men
who were standing around the tender
foot edged away as by common i'm
pulse. They thought they shifted some
thing coming.
Where's your hundred for this
marker?' inquired Upton. flicking the
marker from the ace.
The hundEed?' said the youngster in
a wondering sort OF tone. Why, i
Evening star., 1909-06-05
M~]U.--1- E5Dt-- 11l T-I5{N I5{N

that I'm holding the pole good and
taut, but just as soon as they feel tho
strap slackening they'll glare up at
me reproachfully and begin to develop
that old tenseness of the muscles.
Women. by the way, are naturally
clumsy with their feet in the water. You'd
naturally suppose that with the lightness
on their feet that they exhibit in walk
ing, dancing and SO on, they'd show the
same sort of foot nimbleness in the water.
but they don't. The feminine feet in the
water are curiously heavy and awkward.
They rarely or never work in instructive
unison with the hands and arms. Their
pedal movements in the water have 10
be taught them, and even the graduates
do not often become adept at the foot
work in the water.
1T is wholly different with the boys
and men. The boys feet take care of
themselves in the water. They operate
naturally. automatically. The boy doesn't
have to be taught the foot stuff at all.
When he gets on to the arm strokes he's
through. His feet work properly by ma
ture and instinct. I've got girl and wom
en- pupils who are quite proficient as to
the arm strokes, but | have to give them
lesson after lesson as TO the management
Of their feet and limbs. and still they
don't exactly catch ii.
Girls and women, too. are badly ham,
pered in their efforts to learn how to
Evening star., 1909-06-05

verge of attempting to make a Patsie OF
you.
This is your cue to pick up the most
accessible half-brick and to hurl the
same at him for keeps.
This is an heroic method. but it's
necessary.
IF you don't put his light out at once,
why you're nailed. and self-preservation
is natures first law.
After the coroner has sat upon a few
half-brcked specimens of the man who
is always talking about his young ones
the tribe will gradually diminish like the
Hawaiian Kanakas under the obliterat-
ing influence of rum and things; and at
length We'll be permitted to give personal
supervision to our own little catalogue Of
troubles
Speed that bright day. l have spake.
and that'll be ay-bout all.'
Evening star., 1909-06-05

a government official who in his younger
day spent number OF years in western
mining camps when they were new and
''wooly."
# fell to thinking Of this a few even
ings ago when l read story in which
seasoned but desperate gambler took
chance by opening jackpot without
holding openers and winning out on the
play On a certain. occasion l saw
tenderfoot take stiffer chance than that
with one of the worst men in the west,
and the very audacity of the tenderfoot
was what enabled him to win out with
Evening star., 1909-06-05

decrease in crime.
"But he can't keep it to himself, and
he won't.
Hes got to nail you and me UP against
the coping and tell US all about 'em.
He never by any chance takes any ac-
count Of the fact that we've raised few
of them, and provided 'em with shoes and
hats and duds and high school educa-
tions and such like, and married one or
two of 'em off, perhaps; and that we had
our little whack at the enjoyment of the
infantile prattling stun way back yonder
in the days when there was net hang
ing around the still uncompleted top OF
the Washington Monument.
Nope. He seems to have it all doped
out that we only landed here fifteen or
twenty minutes previously from Sirius
the Dog Star; that we never saw or heard
of young one before in all our bawn
days, and that consequently it's his mis-
sion to nudge us into dark corners and
stake us to two-hour dissertations rela-