The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-08-15

or sorry 10 get Dack IL eeems
 little sthrange to be here again in
 in turmoil iv life in a large city but thin again 'tis pleasant to see tn familyar faces wanst more. Has amy thing happened since I wint away on me vacation? Did ye miss me? Am much sunburnt?''
 "what ar-re ye talking aboutT' ask ed MT. Hennessy. T see ye on'y last night"
 ssYe did not" said Mir. Dooley.. "Ye may have seen me undher study but ye didn't see me. Where was I. It depinds on what time iv night 1t was. If it was eight o'clock was crossin' Y in Pierpont Morgon's yacht of tn coost fv Labrador. We were both iv us setttn' up on tn front stoop iv tn boat. had just won thirty millyon dollarp firm him throwin' dice an he remarked to me: I bet it's hot in Chicago But about eight thirty. tn wind which had been blowin' acrost east an I moved back to New poort"
 "Ar-re 1ve crazy firm tn heat?' Mir. Hennessy asked.
 ssDfvvle tn bit" said Mir. Dooley, s'but long ago I made up me mind not to be tn slave iv me vacation. I don't take a vacation whin a vacation comes around an knocks at tn dure an i4AxdBs Alc OQI tO 1 buUliAcT TSsoTL. 1T I1 did I'd wait long time. take il kwhiniver I feel like it. whinive r ] have . moment to spare. whin ye are talkin' or business is slack firm amy other reason. I throw a comb an brush into 8 gripsack an hurry away Ito tn mountain or tn seashore. While ye think ye are talkin' to me at that very minyit I may be floating on me back in tn Atlantic Ocean or climbin'- . mountain in Switzerland. yodellin to mesilf.
 s.Most iv me frinds take their vaca- tions long afther they are overdue. That's because they don't know how to take thim. They depind on railroads an steamships an what tn boss has to say about it. Long afther tn vaca- ton will do thim no good. about tn fifteenth iv August, they tear of rr tn beauties iv nature. Nacherally they can't tear off very far or they wudden't hear tn whistle whin 1t blew to call thim back. FIT a week or two they spind their avenins larnin' tn profis- syon iv baggaeman, atin' off throunks be day an sleepin' on thim be night Evenchooly tn time comes f'r thim to lave tn sthrife an throuble iv tn city that they're used to fr sthrife an throuble iv th' country that they don't know how to handle. They catch tn two-two 1T Mudville -be-th' -Cannery or they are just about to catch 1t whin they reminder that they left their tickets, money an little Abigail Ann behind thim an they catch tn six forty five which dosen't stop at Mudvtlle ex- cipt on Choosdahs an Fridah's In Lent an thin on'y on signal. Fin'lly they're off. Tn dust on worry iv tn city with its sprinkled pavements am its glowin' theayters Is left behind. Tn cool counthry air blows into tn car laden with tn rich perfume iv dainty food with which tn fireman is plyin' his irn horse. Tn thrain stops occasion'lly In fact ye might betther say that oc- casion'lly 1t don't stop. A thrain that is going to amy iv tn penal colonies will stop at more places thin a boy on an errand. Whiniver 1t sees Q human habitation 1t will pause an exchange few wurruds iv pleasant greetin'. It will stop ct annything. It wud stop at nawthtn'. In this way ye get a good idea iv tn 3ography iv ye'er native land Ye make ten minyt stay at Dustlin' little villages that ye didn't know were on tn map an ain't on amy thrain don't stop is at Mudville- beth Cannery. Ye look into tn folder an see ye'er town marked see note b. Note b says: Thrains two to sixteen stop at Mudville only whin wrecked What is tn number tv this here can- non ball express says ye to tn conduc- tor man. Number twelve says he. How am goin' to get off therer says ye. How do ye usually get off a movin' thrAin?' says he. Torward or back wardr says he. If yell So ahead to tn postal car an get into a mail bag tn clerk may hang ye on tn hook as we pass. He's good shot. He made three out iv ten last week. he says But in due time ye reach ye'er distination an onpack yeer thrunks an come home again. A frind iv mine, a prominent railroad oficyal who calls tn thrains at tn Union Deepo tells me he's cured his wife iv wantin' to go on a vacation. Whiniver he sees her readin' advertisements iv tn summe fer resirts he knows that th' fit is cor
 on an befure she gets to tn stag " buyin' a cure fir freckles he takes CT down to tn deepo an shows her a people goin' on their vacations a4- comin' back. Thin he gives her a boat ride in tn park. takes her to tn theaytre an tn next mornin' she wakes up with hardly any sign K her in disposition.
 But tn kind iv vacition take does ye some good. It is well within me means. In fact, it sildom costs me an nything but now an thin tn thrade iv a customer that I give a bottle iv pop to whin he ast fir a gin sour. not know in that at tn minytt I was whilin' me time away In tn Greek Islands or climbin' Mount Vesoovyous. I don't have to carry amy baggage. I don't pay amy railroad fares. I'm not bothered be mosquitoes or rain. In fact its on rainy days that I thravel most I'm away most iv tn time. l suppose me business suffers. But what care I? In tn autumn I am pretty apt to be shootin' in tn Rocky Mountains. In tn winter am lible to go to Flor Carlo I'm tn on'y American citizen that iver beat Monty Carlo. I plugged away at number sivinteen an 1t came tip eighty-two times runnin'. Iris thrue I squandhered tn money on tn fickle Countess de Erie, but aisy come aisy go. Me disappointment was soon f'r- gotten among tn gayeties iv Algeers I often go up tn Nile because it's han dy to tn Ar-rchery road. I can get back befure bedtime. In summer I may go to Newport although it ain't tn place 1t was whin I first wint there It was simple thin. People laughed al Clarence von Steenwant because he wore a hat encrusted in dimons instead iv tn rough-an'-ready goold bonnet that ye grabbed firm tn rubbish iv old pearl necklaces an marredge cer- tyflcates on tn hall table whfn ye wint out to play tennis. It has changed since. But there are still few ripri- sintatives iv tn older memberships iv tn stock exchange who cannot lave th' familyar scene an I like to dhrop in on these pathricyans an gossip iv days that ar-re no more. Faith there's nrAl lV mo