davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
STRICT sAeeATARiANs.
fFrom the Glasgow News
Air-"Bonnie Dundee. .

Air-"Bonnie Dundee -
eAirs. carrie Nation. Of Ratchet rotor
crusade in Dundee. In an interview with
Lord Provost Usquhart she quoted Solo
mon. The interview and other points are
oeait with IN the following verses.)
To Lord Provost Urquhart, twas Carrie
who spoke.
Ere, my work is well done. you must
bend TO my yoke,
For l guess and I calculate Bonnie Dun
dee
Must follow the lead of my Ratchet and
me.
Come, empty your cup; come, empty
your can;
Astonish the world from Beersheba to
Eschew the small port and the barley
And stick to your marmaIade. Bonnie
Dundee.
Now Carrie declares that King solomon
said,
All look not at all on the wine when tbs
red.
But the Provost, douce man, says, Just
cen let him be,
For aud Solomon wfsna exactly T. I.
She marched round the pubs on a satur-
And men late at business" were shak-
ing with fright;
They even drank soda, but naught could
avail
To keep them from turning triple-x
pale
The barmaids were anxious. the publicans
wild,
And the froth fell quite flat on the bit
ter and mild,
And spirits were dropping all over the
town
Those spirits that rise when the spirits go
down.
She waved her proud hand and her trum-
pet she blew.
Saying, Now I've begun / Will see TINS
thing through; 80,
But what 1 may do you'd best wait I'LL
you see,
For you've not heard the last of my
hatchet and me-
Come, empty your cup; come, empty your
can;
Astonish' the world from BeersheOa to
Dan.
Eschew the small port and the barley
corn bree, ,-
And stick TO your marmaIade. Bonnie
Dundee.
There are stills beyond Pentland, and Vats
beyond Forth; -
There are hops in the Lowlands, there
malt in the North;
There are Hielan' distillers three tnousahu
times three, n
Who are not without hope yet Tor Bon
ME Dundee.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
SPARING HER NERVES.
youths Companion.D

The mistakes. which were plentifully
sprinkled along Mrs Corners career, were
never regretted by any one more than
Mrs Conner herself. L used the very best
Judgment ! had she said, referring to
one unfortunate occurrence, but, as
usual everything went wrong
You see. l went to Greenville in the
morning with Mrs Hobart, intending to
go on to Nashua: but | changed my mind
when the weather turned cool, and spent
the day with Anna Woods. going home at
dusk. I'd forgotten my little bag with
my key in it, so / went right over to
Mrs. Hobart's.
Shed gone down the road to Mrs
Coles, but / found her key behind the
left-hand blind, and went right in.
''The house was dark, but l said to my
self. I won't light d lamp for fear of
soaring her, q timid woman living all
alone as she does. So 1 sat in the dark
till I heard her coming up the walk.
when she wound the door unlocked.
she gave a kind of gasp; so 1 stepped for
ward. and then, long as I had a cold so
my voice didn't sound natural, and / was
afraid 'twOuld scare her. she being so
timid, I put out my hand and laid Il on
her arm
And if you'll believe me-" finished Mrs.
Conner, piaintively. "she fell right over in
a faint. and cut her forehead on the edge
of the rocking chair, and ] thought I'd
never bring her to-
There's no use Of trying to be careful
with a woman like her"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
WHITE HOUSE pERoUIsITEs.

Chairman Tawney of the house COM
mittee on appropriations estimates a
deficit at the end of the present fiscal
year of from 1925, coo, zoe to $50. 600, 900,
but there is apparently no way 20 pre-
vent the scattering of money right and
left under the present administration.
Whether conditions will improve after
the 4th Of March remains to be seen,
but the action of the president-eiect in
drafting two warships to accompany
him on his trip to the isthmus is not an
encouraging sign. If the ideas of Mr..
Taft in this direction continue to ex-
pand it will probably be considered as
quite the proper thing to send the
whole feet with him next time.
The senate has seen fit to raise the
salary of the president, vice president
and the federal judges, and there will
be no outcry If the house adds its con-
sent. but all forms of presidential per-
quisites should be cut off and the oe-
cupant of the executive mansion and
the heads of departments held to Il
strict accounting. Mr.. Roosevelt con-
ceived it to be his duty to send mes
sage TO congress regarding the alleged
use of the ranking privilege by Sen
ator Tillnian. but he did not hold up
his hands in holy horror when the fact
became known that tons of Republican
campaign literature had been distrib-
uted BY use OF the frank of the agricul-
turaI department, nor did he even men,
ton the fact in any of his voluminous
MESA es.
So far as dipping into the treasury is
concerned the hands of Mr.. Roosevelt
are not clean. The fact that the col
ored barber who shaves the president
is on the government pay roll as a
clerk in one of the departments at a
salary of 81 500 a year is proof positive.
Milady of the White House also pays
certain classes of help in the same
manner. The offense of Senator Till
man is trivial in comparison with this
systematic fiIching at the fountain head
of the government.
The barber. however, is in great luck.
A salary of 81 500 a year for one scrape
each day is not to be sneezed at or
lightly estimated. Happy William Du-
lany. who caught the fancy of the great
man who rules and reigns over us. In
the meantime the debts Of the govern
ment are piling up.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
THE COURTEOUS JAPANESE.
Instructions Issued by. the Governor
to Care for All Foreigners
CChicag go News

Chicago NeNS-D
American and European visitors 10
Yokohama. Japan. should fare very
well, if the instructions issued by the
governor Of the prefecture are lived up
to by the natives. The Japan AdVer-
tiser quotes these instructions, which
are, IN part, as follows: The governor
has given the following instructions 10
be observed by police officials, school
pupils. etc:
Nobody should hang around foreign.
ers on the streets or when the latter
are shopping
Merchants should not overeharge
when foreigners make purchases
Foreigners dogs. when taken ON the
streets, should not be molested ey
stone throwing or by challenging to
fight with other dogs.
Foreigners should be very kindly
and courteously treated, and when they
come to the government offices the
suitable sitting accommodations should
be allowed them.
Attention should be paid to the for
eign usages in vogue. like that foreign
ers do not uncover in Offices and for
eign ladies do not uncover even in case
of ceremonies and foreign couples walk
together hand In hand.
Foreigners being attentive to the
should be taken not to cruelty treat
animsls.
mo insulting remarks or jokes
should be made against foreigners COS
tune, manners or conversation
when foreign ladies are present in
a train, tram car or in waiting rooms,
care should be taken not to place lug
gage, etc, in confused heap so as to
make it impossible for foreigners to sit
down.
Nobody should gaze unnecessarily
at foreigners faces.
when entering foreign offices care
should be taken not to wear muddy
shoes.
1T should be remembered that for
eign missionaries. like Japanese priests,
are respected by their countrymen.
Care should be taken not to allow
children TO throw stones or place any
impediments or in any other way on
struct the way where foreigners are
riding bicycles or in any other way tax
ing outdoor exercise.
Foreigners should not be pointed az
with the finger.
No tobacco should be smoked at
places where it is morally forbidden or
in the presence of foreign ladies.
when foreign ladies enter room a
seat should be taken after the ladies
have sat down.
Those who are studying foreign Ian
guages should not accost foreigners,
when it is unnecessary, merely for the
purpose of practice.
when speaking with foreigners only
necessary matters should be talked
about and time should be saved.
Visiting should be made at times
convenient to foreigners.
Foreigners ages should not be
asked except in case of absolute neces-
sity.
when meeting foreign funerals re-
Spect should be paid and derisive re-
marks OF insulting words should b.
avoided.
THE idea should be eradicated from
the mind that foreigners always give
money to beggaTs for the mere asking.
Fixed prices should be marked on
staple products at ali places.
collars. cuffs, handkerchiefs, shoes.
etc should be kept clean.
when walking with foreigners FOOT
steps should be taken IN uniformity.
when foreigners look at their
watches it should be remembered that
they have other pressing business to
attend to"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
WHEN PHRENoLoGIsT FELL.
Detroit Free Press. }


Mayor Reyburn OF Philadelphia. the
owner of the record-breaking trotter Ed
Bryan, told at dinner a horse story.
"a farmer visited a phrenofogist." he
said. He had heard that the phrenolo-
gist thought of buying a horse. He had
his head examined and his bumps re-
vealed surprising things.
Your tastes are the simple, homely
and pure tastes of a farmer said the
phrenologist, and farmer I take you
to be. Am I not right7 Aha. I thought
so. You are unready and faltering in
speech; you find il difficult to express
the simplest ideas. You are sadly def
eient in judgment and have no knowledge
of human nature. Your innocent and
trusting disposition renders you an easy
dupe to designing men, and your own per-
feet honesty prevents you from either sus-
pecting or defTauding any one
The phrenologist the following week
bought a horse from the farmer. The
horse was knock-kneed it was p years
old, II had a bad temper, and il baked.
Though the farmer had only paid s15 for
the animal, he secured without difficulty
$50 from the phrenologist for il.
It's wonderful said the farmer to
himself. as he FASTENED toward the bank
to deposit the money-it's jest wonderful
that a man should know so much about
men and not know a thing about
bosses = -
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
ATTACK UPON THE STATES.

Now comes a former United States
attorney, William Michael Byrne of
New York, with the assertion that the
time is coming when state lines will be
obiiterated and all the power and ma
chinery of government viii be
lodged in federal hands. In the course
Of lecture on American eonsti-
tutional law before the students Of
the Fordham law school. Mr.. Byrne
outlined his views on the existing or
der of things as follows:
In conserving extensive rights to the
states the constitution protects the in
estimable right of local self-govern-
ment: but this cumbersome and expen-
sive machinery of state government is
"a tremendous price to pay for home
rule. which. because Of the perfect
unity of our people, could be obtained
by system OF municipal and rural ad-
ministration.
The present system of state govern
nlent is a menace to our peace and
prosperity. The danger to our pros
perity is perceptible to anybody who
wiu deeply study the growing complex
lty of our interstate laws. National
commerce will in time be chained and
fettered by the solons Of some forty
odd capitols. Our peace is in no less
danger. When We murdered the sub
iects of Italy in New Orleans our fed
eral government was obliged TO confess
its impotence in the matter. Anarchy
would have held high riot in Chicago
il the patriotic and fearless Cleveland
had not stretched federal power to
sweep aside the inactive governor Of
Illinois; and even now a great war may
be provoked with Japan unless our
eountrymen in California pay heed to
the cautious wisdom of President
Roosevelt The power 10 declare war
is taken from the states by the consti-
tuition, but il leaves them with the
power to provoke war in the admins
tration of their reserved powers. These
lnsufficiencies in the constitution viii
receive in time the thoughtful attention
Of the American people. and viii be
solved by that consummste wisdom
which at all times has lowered over the
history of the United States"
There may be. and doubtless are. de-
fects in our system Of government. and
it is possible the constitution under
which the United States has risen to
the front rank in the family Of nations
needs amending. but the idea Of a CEN
trsiised form Of goyespmsRt With iee
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
HE WAS THE WHOLE SHOW.
CKansas City JOurnal.)

II is related of a certain candidate for
a state office in the last Kansas cam
paign that he billed himself for a speech
in a southern Kansas town on a certain
October day, and wrote ahead TO num-
Der of friends there to give him Ups.
One of them told him to see certain
colored man on his arrival in the town.
IF you can get the vote of this negro,
wrote the friend, you can get the vote
of the whole negro population in this
town. Don't fail to see him and get
him TO your way Of thinking.
About the first thing the candidate
did after registering at the hotel was
to look up this negro. It was only
little while after the introduction that
he was calling the negro by his given
name, filing his pockets with cigars,
passing him compliments and generally
'ssiving him the taffy." The negro took
II all and enjoyed the occasion i'm
mensely. The candidate spent several
hours in the negro's company, and after
he thought the proper degree Of warmth
had been obtained, preached the real
object of his friendship: say. John, 1
want the negro vote of this town"
"An right replied John, 'Tn vote
TO- you sab. I'll vote for you. I'm TO
you, sab"
That's all right said the candidate.
That's all right. I'm sure you will.
I'm sure you will. But ] want 10 have
the whole negro vote OF this town. i
want to get it all
Oats all right" responded the negro.
Il done said I'd vote TO you. I'm you
friend. I'll suttingly cast my vote TO
you"
But, say, John, 1 know that" said
the candidate. "See here, I'll be frank.
The fellows told me that you are a big
man among the eolored folks down here
and that If I could get your vote I'll get
the whole negro vote in this place. Do
you catch On?"
"Sho'," replied John. ''Sho' 1 do.
You'll git de whole niggah vote all right.
Dey won't be no trouble bout dat, sab.
Yo' see, I'm de only niggah in dis here
whole town.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

given last evening at the Orpheum, FOL
lowed by a supper party, at which tSe
features of the affair were the hume
rails thirteen. The party was arranged
by thirteen young men and their part
neTs numbered thirteen. The table It
the supper was lighted by thirteen
candles. Thirteen roses were used in
each vase, and thirteen bon-bOn boxes
were used. Those in the party were
Mr.. and Mrs. c. L. Westlake, Mr.. and
Mrs. e. w. Rauscher. Ii. r. Brown and
Miss Annie Russin, L. NJ. Martin and
Miss Katherine Bennett, G. z. Larson
and Miss Ardeil9 Brown. p. II. Patter-
son and Miss Anna Bennett, c. y. Car
ruthers and Miss Hazel Ostler, H. NJ.
Andrews and Miss Pearl Smart, F. P.
Martin and Miss Ethel Bennett, j. h.
Snyder and Miss Florence Birken, \.
W. Duste and Miss Maud Birken, A
n. Rosenbaum and Miss Dot KenneT,
Dr. E Nj Keyser and Miss Hazel
Bailey.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
A TEMPERANCE BALLAD.
Oondon Chronicle. }

Dean Ramsey knew of Sabbatarians
among his countrymen even stricter than
those who almost killed" a man for
whistling and looking happy on Sunday.
There was the countryman who, asked
by an English artist to tell him the name
of a local ruined castle, replied; Its no
the day to be speering sic things And
there was the cook whose kitchen was
provided with a fine new roasting jack
which never stopped On Sunday her mis-
tress found it put out of action. and the
cook explained that "she was nae gazing
to hae the fule thing clacking and rinning
about in her kitchen a. the blessed Sab
bath day" But over some things even
Scottish Sabbatarians had no power. A
henwife. selling her fowls, remarked: In
deed. my Teddy. they lay every day, no
excenting the blessed Sabbath"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
ELIGIBLE TO ANANIAs CLUB.

(Tit-Bits.f
Sir Archibald Geilxie. the distinguished
geologist, who will probably succeed Lord
Rayleigh as president OF the Royal so
ciety, tells a good story IN his capital
book of Scottish "Reminiscences
II was quite sure you had been in our
aeighborhOod,f a friend said to Sir Arch
ibaid. II met the old farmer of c.,
VINO had a strange tale to tell me.
bod, Mr.. Caithca-t-' he began i ran
across the queeTest body the other day.
AS 7 was coming by the head of the
eleugh I thocht ] heard q wheen tinkers
quarrelin'. but when / lookit down there
was ae wee stool man. Whites he was
chaplin the rocks wi a hammer, whiles
he was writin' in a book, whiles fechtin
WI the thOrns and misca'in them for
that was bad. When he cam Up frae the
burn. him and me had a large confab
DodI he tellt me a about the stanes. and
hoo they showed that Scotland was snce
like Greenland. srnoored in ice. very
entertainin' body. Mir. Caithcart, but-an
awful, awfu' leear.'
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
A GENEROUS MAN.
washington Post)

WaS1EIlSI0I fOSl-I
Two Irishmen were discussing the death
Of a friend.
Said Pat:
sure Casey was a good fellow"
He was that" replied Mike. "A good
fellow. Casey"
And a cheerful man was Casey said
Pat
"A cheerful man was Casey. the cheer
fullest I ever knew" echoed Mike.
Casey was 8 generous man, too said
Pat
so much about that. Did Casey ever buy
you anything"
well. nearly replied Mike. scratching
his head "One day he came into Fla
herty's barro0m. where me and my friend
were drinking. and he said TO us: Well
men. what are we going TO have-rain or
snow
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

George Whitney Wood, Sunshine.
Minnie Elizabeth Denny, Salt Lake.
james Z. Ross. Sugar City. Ida
Iauretta J. Hunt. Sugar City, Ida
James Kinder. Lehi
Eleanor jackson. American Fork
Alfred NJ. Z. Schultz. Seattle. Wash.
Pauline L. VI. Timer. Salt Lake.
J. T Stoddsrd. Richmond.
Edna Crockett. Swan Lake. fda.
Hugh II. Jennings. Grand Junction. Co
Pauline Cummings. Salt Lake.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
Mrs. winsIow's Soothing Syrup.

OF MOTHERS for their CHILDREN
WHILE TEETHING, with PERFECT
SUCCESS. 1t sooTHEs the CHILD
SOFTENS the GUMS. ALLAYS an
best remedy for DIARRHOEA. Sold nv
Druggists in every part of the world. Be
sure and ask for Mrs. WinsIowfs Soofn
twenty-five cents a bottle. GUARAN-
TEED UNDER THE FOOD AND DRTJG
ACT. JUNE 90 1906 SERIAL NUMBER
f0es
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
OVERTAkEN.
(Everybody's Magazine.

livery bOdN NaEazine.f
A wizened little man charged his wife
with cruel and abusive treatment His
better half. or in this case, better two
thirds was a big square jawed woman
with a determined eye.
The Judge listened to the plaintiffs re-
cital Of wrongs with interest
ssVNhere did you meet this woman, who,
according to your story, has treated you
SO dreadfully2" his honor asked.
We'll. judge" replied the little man,
making a brave attempt to glare defiantly
at his wife. II never did meet her. She
Just kind Of overlook me-
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
WHERE THERE'S A WILL.
(Delineator.)

Helen's mother passed her the cake, and
when the little one went to reach across
the plate for the largest piece her mamma
said: Always take the piece nearest to
you. dear
well, then. turn the plate around" was
the answer
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

St. Paul Is much quoted these days,
especially the paragraph where he ad-
vises taking a little wine for the stom-
aeh's sake. The prohibition question
wasn't being discussed when Paul
wrote to Timothy.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Carrie Nation was egged in London.
Rather an expensive way of expressing
disapprovaL The people of this coun-
try are not wasting any eggs just now,
not even on bum actors.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Senator Hepburn is "agin" the postal
savings bank bill. The Idaho senator
is gaining fame as the chronic SEN
atorial kicker.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Swearing they would ne'er consent,
the members of the house consented.
The inaugural ball will be held in the
pension building.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
You VIII Be Glad

II you see US now about that wall paper
and painting. New goods and the best
Of Workmen.
W. A DUVALL.
Both phones. 1ie ". Second South
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Tomorrow win witness the second
birth of the Cuban republic Also prob
ably the last
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Why not lump it all under one head
- bill for an act to regulate the uni
verse;"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Iogroning has commenced in real
earnest in Washington. Small chance
for tariff reduction.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Il is said President-elect Taft no
longer asks advice Of Roosevelt. What
base ingratitude.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
The Best Printing
MARRIAGE LICENSES.

Is done by The Century, salt Lake 8
printers. 165-1e7 South West Temple.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
Total Copies of The Herald Printed
IN Oeeemher. 1908.

%%%++++ @%<+~ 80 = =
Largest Daily and Sunday
. Circulation in Salt Lake proved
= by investigation.
= y y = y =
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Miss Mabelie Cssady and Miss Ellie
Frederickson will entertain at $50 on
Friday evening at the home of the
former
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27
Termn of suhserlptIon.

DAILY AND SCNDAY-One month"; .
ceatz; three months s2-50, one year. INV
StJEDAY-One year. g.
SEMI = WEEKLY-ttn ADVANCE. OnS
year. 81 So. SIX months. q cents.
Subscribers wishing address OF paper
changed must give former as wen a.
present address. 80.
All papers are continued Until exphct
order is received to discontinue All ar
I garages must he paid IN every case
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

The people Of the Ninth ward will
give their annual character ball in
their ward hall on Friday evening.
l.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Mrs. Paul c. Potter will give a bridge
tea on Tuesday next for her guest
Miss Seiz, before her return to san
Francisco.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

There was Lucky Thirteen party
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Mrs. Frank A Lowe will entertain
informally at tea on Friday afternoon
In honor Of her mother, Mrs. F. E.
Ripley.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Mrs. Z. 4. Zenger announces the en-
gagement of her daughter Isabella to
A. c. Christensen. jr., the marriage to
take place in March.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Mrs. John s. Brsnsford entertained
a party of friends at the Colonial yes
terday afternoon.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-01-27

Mrs. ] Walcott Thompson entertains
today at a luncheon at the University
club.