The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-12-17
THAT SKINNER BOY.
He Has His Regular Saturday Adj
lures.

Humpy Skinner was hanging over the
gate Saturday morning after breakfast
: and was wishing he was one of the In
dams in Buffalo Bills show. when his
mother called him in and said:
"Humpy, do you want your hide
taken off and hung up on the fence?"
NO, mother
DO you want to be chained up down
cellar among the rats and fed on bread
and water?''
NO"
"Then YOU will do just as 1 tell you
to. I want two yards of carpet-binding
like this sample. It's five cents a yard.
Go to the store and get it. If you are
not back in half an hour, look out for
me. Here's a dime.
Humpy set out on a dog-trot. He
could do the errand in 20 minutes. he
was within 80 feet of the store where ne
was going to make his purchase when a
man in doorway stopped him to say:
Look here, bub, you like a joke,
don't your
II guess so, sir
of course you do. I could tell it by
the very way you walk. You like a joke
and like a joke. and I'll tell you how
we can get great laugh.
But I've got to get some carpet bind
ing for mother said Humpy.
On. there IL D6 ptcIIE VI lliiAC LII
that after the joke. There is never no
hurry about carpet binding. There is d
grocery ON the next corner"
Yes, sir
IT'S kept by an old German"
Yes 1 know"
Great friend of mine. I've known
him for years. Nice old man, but he
thinks he's sharper than razor. L
want to show him that he isn't. He's
got waternelons out in front. He was
~
anybody could steal one he might have
it. Let's you and 1 get the biggest one
of the lott
But don't want to steal, SIR re-
piled Humpy.
1T won't be stealing. 1t will be
joke We will get the laugh on him.
Boy, don't let me find out that I was
mistaken in ~'zing you up for funny
boy. I'll go along with you down TO
the grocery, and when we get there I'll
go in. I'll keep the old man busy for
five minutes, and you pick out the big
gest melon and wait for me on the next
corner. Ha! ha! ha, but it will be
funny. OF course. I'll go in tomorrow
and pay him. It's just to take him
down peg. you know. Come on"
Put I'll get the carpet binding first"
You'll do nothing of the kind I am
not going to lose big joke for any
carpet binding. You can get that later.
If you carry home the half of a big
watermelon with your carpet binding
your mother will hug you to her bosom
with joy"
Humpy was undecided and in doubt
but the man took him by the arm and
led him along. The grocer was stand
ing in front of the door, and there were
a score of watermelons billed UP at one
side. The stranger asked for something
that took the grocer back into the
store and after a look around Humpy
lifted up the biggest melon and walked
with if He met three four
pie before he reached the next corner,
but no one said anything TO him. Five
minutes later he was Joined by the
man, who laughed and slapped his leg
and said:
What a joke. What joke. WIZ.
I'll he laughing about it for month
to Gomez
And you are going to give me. half
of it?''
what! 1 give you half of this
melonr'
''Rut you said you would
"Poy. don't fool with mel II anybody
rouses me I'm a desperate man. In the
first Mace. watermelon must be put on
ice before being eaten, and in the next
it's not good for boys. You'd better get
that carpet binding and run along
home"
Humpy had been led into a trap. and
it was useless for him to say anything
While he stood there with tears in his
eyes the man shouldered the melon AMI
walked off with it. saying:
Good boy. AS soon as I saw you
knew that you could appreciate
joke"
Humpv didn't want to pass the gro
Gerry again. and he was making cir
cult to avoid it when an old woman at
her gate stopped him to say:
Roy. have you got a mother?"
"Yes'mP'
Then I'm sure you love her. l have