The Huttig news., 1909-01-16
THE LAND OF FEDORA A Country That Has Long Since
 Passed Away

needn't look for it on the map because 1t ain't there-'
 And this is why said the second.
 And this is why" said the first. The ruler of Fedora was an uneasy kind of potentate, always wanting laws to be passed The people mustn't do this under penalty, and they mustn't do that under penalty, and with one thing and another it went from bad to worse until he had law passed that the people must all ways stick to the literal truth under penalty of Imprisonment without the option of fine.''
 And that's how it began" said the second ancient mariner
 Well. sir, Bill and me landed in Fedora the next day, filled with inno- cence about the passage of incriminat- ing regulations, and we made a few remarks, promiscuous, about sea serpent or two. days run we made, tidal wave we saw and few odd things like that"
 Thinking no harm"
 And first thing we knew we were in jail, tight But we hadn't been in long when another string of prison CTS were conducted to the dungeons. Six. What are you in for?' said we. First man said I was telling cer- tain senorita that she was the most beautiful in all Fedora and they seized me- Second man said: I was telling friend about the wisdom of my in- fant child and they seized me- Third man said: I was relating my experi- ence on a recent fishing expedition and they seized me- Fourth man said: I was telling an old fogy that I was glad too see him and they seized me- Fifth man said: I was telling the boys that my wife didn't care how late I stayed out at night and they seized me- Sixth man said: I was telling a stranger how fast my horse could trot, and here I am.'
 Senors,' said I, as they all began to groan, rest easy, for feel an ap- prehension that we shall soon have company
 "A lot of company" corrected the first.
 "Muy muchendos," said the second. And while was still making the ob- servation about the propinquity of company the doors swung open again and dozen more prisoners were cast into the cells. Three were merchants, three were lawyers, one was the weather man, one was a huckster who had been crying Fresh fish, one was a real estate agent who had been caught saying that the plumbing was in good order, one was painless dentist and the other two had been caught signing business letters Yours truly"
 ".This Is outragiosos,' said one.
 'Mallyi But some one shall suffer for thisi' said another, and the rest began to gnaw their nails and hiss be- tween their teeth.
 'Senors,' said I, fear not. for un- less I greatly mistake the signs and portents, Fedora is in for larks.' -
 Whereupon the two ancient mari ners made merry and were glad.
 By eight o'clock that night we were six in cell" said the first.
 "By nine o'clock we were ten in cell" said the second.
 By ten o'clock they were stuffing them into the courtyard. said the first
 And still they came. In the morn ing the court had to sign an order en- larging the confines of the jail to in- clude the market place and the grand opera house and before noon the or der was amended to include the regi- mental barracks, the racetrack and all the public parks. Feeding the pris- oners became a serious problem and when cook got tired all he had to do was to tell about storm he had seen once where the hailstones were as big as hens eggs and immediately he was placed under arrest, and in stead of feeding others somebody had to feed him.
 Well, sir, the prisoners came in by the shoals and droves and the court had to pass another order still further enlarging the limits of the jail to include all that territory lying within the boundaries of Fedora. Next morn ing there was no breakfast and you ought to have heard the way the pris- eners howled insisting on their consti- tutional rights to be fed
 But, senors, the cooks are all in jail,' said a voice.
 "'Then let the judges pardon them,' cried the prisoners.
 But, senors, the judges are in jail, too said the voice.
 Then let the legislature pardon them,
 But the legislature is also in jail,' said the voice.
 "'Then we'll elect a new legisla- ture. said the people.
 But you can't said the voice, it is the law that any man who is impris- ened shall lose his right to vote and there isn't free man in Fedora to- day
 What! said somebody, ifs the ruler prisoner, too?'
 Yes said the voice. somebody