Connecticut western news., 1909-10-28
CONFESSIONS OF
 A SPECIAL WRITER
"REMINISCENCES BY SAM ]. BANKS
Series of Humorous Stories, Material For Which is Drawn From Authors Personal Observations, While Study ina the American Circus.

Were the circus man a cartoonist. he could certainly find a wealth of material for pictures around the tent show. Every day, throughout the season, he witnesses many amusing incidents on the lot" as the show grounds are desig. mated in the parlance uf circusdom. l. is of some of these humorous incidents that I shall write, drawing my material from personal observations.
 One of the biggest jokes that comes circusward is the "phony" or fake detective. This fellow has sent five dollars to Oshkosh or Ipswich, to some private detectiye agency, received in return a tin star, the photographs of some alleged criminals, and, be sure that you say it in secret whisper, "been appointed a special Sherlock Holmes. '' oftenest an eccentric character. H, comes to the main entrance, and, peer ing intently into the eyes of the door man, mysteriously lifts the lapel ol his coat, revealing q brightly shining shield, winks one eye, aud articulates, in untitled humble, lam a detective. Shades of Nick Carter! You are iu the presence of real, live detective Then he will endeavor to walk right on in. But the experienced snowman s,enting something wrong, says "Wait minute: let me see that badge. , Whereat he reads an inscription some thing like "Rumdum Detective Agency aud promptly informs the wearer that the circus doesn't recognize privat, detectives, and that tickets for the show ara on sale at the big rcd wagon out yonder on the lot.
 Tine funniest characteristic of thi, private species of detective is his belief that Ee is an exceedingly clever ant highly important limb of the law. Fsl Instance, one day down in Georgia luring quiet moment on the door. got into conversation with one of these ,fficeTs. I humored him i'll his detective myth, and he actually made the start l ling statement that che didn't suppose there WAS another man in all Georgia W 10 had caught so many bad criminals as he." Inasmuch as he was small oi stature, seedy, emaciated and fifty.five I reasoned that the fellows physique coupled with his age, corroborated C?) hIs assertion that he was Georgia's s chief criminal catcher. Wherefore, I bowed in his honor and passed him in.
 One time a would-be detectiye, who enjoyed not even the honor of belong Ing to private agency, presented him self at the entrance. He lifted his vest at the arm-hole, made a nasty display of a shining object, quickly concealed the same, and started to pass me. But of course. stopped him, whereat h, said, ill an injured tone. You recog nize detectives, don't you?" In tht meantime, had raised the fellows coa l lapel, looked for his badge, and found il to be none other than bright adjust ment on pair of suspenders bearing the name of the brand, Police" "Yes, answered, i've recognize city officers but not suspender policemen" and told the man where he could buy { | ticket.
 Another amusing incident, and on, totally different, had Its setting il Indiana. A fellow came rushing iron the big top during the progress of tht afternoon performance. I was on tn, door. Hardly halting, he thrust { twenty five cent piece in my hand and whispered. "I will be back in { minute" Subsequently he returned but not a word did he say.
 In spite of the fact that the words Main Entrance" in large letters adorn the marquee, every day men ant women cautiously approach the ticket taker. and, tightly grasping the admis sion ticket, doubtfully ask, "Is this tn, main entrance to the big show?
 |.