davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
Ar OUR BoARDTNG HOUSE.

AT OUR BOARDING HOUSE.
think could stand the store eggs anc
And / wouldn't object to the soft pewter
could hope though the platter so seldom
And I'd even be cheerful in spite OF the
If the fellow who sits at the head Of our
And owns a low brow with a southerly
Did not think himself the most palpably
And suavely delectable joker extsnt.
think I could stand without ever COM
The frayed and soiled linen. the cracked
plates and cups,
The mustache the man next to me uses for
straining
The tentative soup he suspiciously sups,
II the bride and the groom could be brave
To baby each other when they were
alone;
II they'd cease to perform as If each were
The scorn I exhibit should never be
shown.
I think I could stand the detestable cook
And / wouldn't object to the damsel who
In spite Of her voice she is pretty good
Which makes up for many regrettabIe
could Worry along. I believe. without
If the IaTdlady'd give up her lSittenish
ways
And cease now and then to come plaintive-
On the fact that she once had seen bet
Boston Courier.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
THE VANITY OF CRIMINALS.

Writing on How Thieves Live" in
the July Everybody's, Charles Somer-
vile discusses in an interesting way
the vanity of criminals. He says in
part:
"Criminologists speak of the brag-
CART vanity of the criminal It is
true of erotic offenders. perhaps But
the thief will tell of the number of
times he has fooled the police merely
by way of self-justifcation. He ad-
mits the premise that he was a fool
ever to become a criminal, and he re-
counts his triumphs only to indicate
to you that, at least, he is not an
absolute idiot.
"Also, Grimm o1ogists point out the
childish vanity of the criminal who
bedecks his person with jewels when
he is prosperous. In this the criminal
is no vainer than his honest brother.
But jewels are about the only sort
of property that he can safely possess,
as was the case with the Jews in the
old days when they were the driven
race. The criminal may not with
safety become a bank depositor, and
he is usually too much Of a spend
thrift to carry a roll of cash; but he
finds that if he is arrested and can
show some handsome diamond orna-
ments and a valuable watch, he will
have no difficulty in securing a good
lawyer and a bondsman, and will
have fighting chance for acquittal
at his trial.
but always, be it understood, the
crook is peering into the windows of
the house of respectability with visit
full eyes. AL Adams, with more than
a million dollars earned from his
despicable policy gambling. which
robbed children of their pennies and
caused starvation in tenement homes.
found himself an enforced hermit in
a crowded city. Even his family did
not live with him. In a suite of
rooms at the Ansonia, with a Japan
csc servant who had no personal feel
ing for him, the man lived alone He
craved human association. Some
times he got it on false pretenses
from chance acquaintances. But he
would shortly be identified, and again
there was only utter loneliness for
him. He shot himself dead"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
a CHANCE FoR KANsAs.

AS was suggested in the news columns
| of this paper recently, If there is need
for a special session of the legislature
| to straighten out the tangles that have
arisen in the banking circles of the
| state. the calling of 1t might be delayed
for a few weeks in order that an oppor-
tunity could be given to the state to go
on record first on the proposition to
amend the federal constitution so that
the government can levy direct tax
on incomes.
This proposed amendment to the
constitution has already passed the
United States senate. There is little
doubt that it will go through the house
of representatives with colors a-fying
in week or ten days, whenever, in
fact, it comes up for consideration in
the regular order of business. Imme-
diateIy upon its passage by congress it
will be certified to the various states
of the union for their ratification. It
must receive the endorsement of at
least three-fourths of the states if it is
to become effective. 1t will take lot
of time, probably full two years, be-
fore all of the states can take action on
this important matter. None of them
will likely call special sessions for this
particular purpose. In several states
only biennial sessions of the legis-
latures are held. and their next reg
ular sessions are a full eighteen months
away. Kansas is in this category.
But with the prospects of a special
session of this states legislature to the
forefront just now, it would appear
that the calling of it could be arranged
so that this amendment to the federal
constitution could be considered. There
is no doubt where the legislators of
Kansas and her people stand on this
proposition. 1t Is safe to say that they
rect income tax. And the chance for
them to declare their position in the
van of all the other states on this i'm
portant matter should not be neglected
Kansas is first among her sister states
in many things. Naturally she should
be first, if possible, in declaring in
favor of a direct income tax. Her
stand in this particular might give
strength and encouragement to other
legislatures in states where the plan to
tax incomes is not looked upon with
much favor by the plutocratic elements
which make their homes in them.
It is not urged for a minute that a
special session of the Kansas legis-
lature should be called for the especial
purpose of acting on this income tax
amendment. But if one is called the
date for it should be fixed so that this
matter can be passed upon
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
HUMOR or THE Day

Suffragette-What is a party without
women? Mere Man dlippantly)-A stag
party. ENTHUSIASTICALLY. And what.
sir, would this nation be without women
but stagnation.-Life.
Prisoner-Can I speak with the Convict
Smith for one moment? Jailer-No, he has
just left, after finishing his time. But ask
me again in about a week.-F'liegende
Blaetter.
Knicker-Do you think Shakespeare was
lawyer? Bocker-No; If he had been he
would have made a fortune deciding
whether Hamlet was mad.-New York Sun.
The Rev. Mr. Hustler's church is GER
tainly up to date" Indeed. How"
and the ushers take up the collection with
cash registers. Boston Transcript.
,Inquiring Son-Papa, what is reason?
Fond Parent-Reason, my boy. is that
which enables man to determine what is
right. And what is instinct?" Instinct
is that which tells a woman she is right
whether she is or not."-London Spare Mo-
ments.
A lady, passing along the street one
frosty morning, saw little fellow scat
said the lady. that's real benevolence''
oh, no, ma'am," he replied. 1T amt
Her-You never dream of getting mar
ried. suppose. Him-Oh! yes-after I've
eaten Welsh rabbit.-Cleveland Leader.
docs your mother allow you to have
two pieces of pie when you are at home
Willie?'' asked his hostess. mo. ma am"
Wen, do you think she would like you
to have two pieces hereT' "Oh she
wouldn't care" said Willie, confidentially;
this isn't her pie.'-Christian Work.
1t is unlucky when travelling by rail to
be alone In the carriage with a homicidal
maniac.
When picking up a lucky horseshoe take
care not to be run over 1t is better to 90
without the horseshoe.
DO you think bee stings cure rheumsl-
tisn1 %
mo" answered grandfather Stubs,
but they're mighty likely to make ylgu
forget you've got it.''-Washington Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
Endnranca az OAK.

Out of the discarded rail fences on
the old farm in Phoenix precinct Will
liam Matches is storing up at his home
a supply of oak wood for household
use. This is not a very remarkable
fact in itself, but there are some par
ticulars in connection that make a
good story Of it. Fifty-six years ago,
after Mr. Mathes had settled in the
Rogue river valley and began to hew
his farm out of the Wilderness he him
self made these Identical rails There
they have Withstood the rayages Of
more than half hundred winters and
summers Except in the case of bot
tom rails resting on the ground, the
timber in them was well preserved, and
Mr. Mathes had them hauled to mis-
home in Ashland for f1rewood, and in
this way, he says, they pay for the
new fence. and furnish the very best OF
fueL-Ashland Tid1ns~
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
FRON OTHER PENS
TING CONTEST" NEWSPAPERS

VOTING CONTEST" NEWSPAPERS
In quick succession newspapers be-
longing to the so-called CIGver-Leaf
combine are disappearing. First came
the collapse of the Kansas ely News,
for which the Butler Kellogg-Asn-
baugh outfit once had claimed II circu-
lation OF $4,000, and for which adver-
Using was secured on the basis CT such
circulation, which the paper never
had. It is doubtful whether 1t ever had
bona f1de circulation of 10000. Then
came the disappearance of the ST.
Joseph Star. If we remember we'll a
started to fill never-felt want, for
new papers in different cities have
quickly gone out of existence.
The experience which the advertising
public has had with certain papers
that have passed away ought to teach
them the lesson to keep their eyes on
papers that still exist and for which
quite enc rmOuS and almost incredible
circulation claims are made, almost as
big claims as were once made for the
Kansas City News. The extensive
patronage of the papers of the combine
which have passed away, was not de-
served. The money spent by business
men in those papers of mushroom
growth was simply thrown away. Is
that spent in certain other papers well
spent? Are these cireulations what
they are claimed to be- or of a kind
secured by guessing and voting con-
tests, such as who is the most popular
policeman" or the most popular car
driver" or the most popular boot
black" which contests necessitate the
buying of copies by the voters" which
copies, therefore, are of no earthly
value to advertisers? It may be time
for advertisers to look a little more
carefully into the business of newspa-
pers of this kind, especially now, when
business men in a number of cities
have found out to their sorrow that
back of the big circulation claims and
other alleged virtues of certain news
papers was only hot air or humbug.-
Mall Order Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
WHERE IT WAS DONE.


Joe Bing, he cut ten cords O. wood
From rise to set O. sun:
He cut it, an he piled it, too
Yes, sir; that's wat he done
10 cut ten cords o. wood 1 VOW
Is one tremendous chore-
Joe Blng cut his behind the stove
In Luscomb's grocery store.
swan, an raked it, too,
An IN twelve hours by the clock
He was entirely through
he could. guess, before he slept
Cut jes' as many more
he cut 1t where he did the wood
In Luscomb's grocery store.
Joe Bing, he pIowed four acres onct,
he plowed it good and neat;
An lore the sun had near gone down
The Job was all complete
Inc noSSes never turned a hair,
Want tired ner leas' bit sore
lie ploWed it all in one short day
In Luscomb's grocery store.
Joe Bing, he made five dollars onct
BY simply pickin' hops;
he done it all in jest a day
With time for Sev-ral stops
he could as well a-kept it up
a dozen days or more.
Where was it done? The same OF place
In Luscomb's grocery store.
-Woman's Home Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

hydrophobia. It is about the same
with other diseases. A hysterical
person looks upon the dark side OF
life. The frightened man or woman
who has eaten too many cucumbers
fears appendicitis. The unfortunate
with an old-fashioned cold inn
mediately begins to dread tuber-
culosis.
DR.. Dulles has been investigating
hydrophobia for % years. He says he
has known of but nine well defined
cases. But he has seen many hum
dreds of spurious cases caused by
fear and hysteria.
Physicians might say the same of
other diseases. Hysteria is dread
full thing. 1t is an able assistant of
the disease gem.
Precaution is excellent. The bite of
a dog. or disease in it's incipiency
should not be lightly considered. The
scientists are offering cures for all
ailments to which human flesh is
heir. Many of them are effective.
But there is no use in making the
mind sick. Hysteria and fear are not
cures.
DR.. Dulles offers an excellent pre-
ventive for many diseases. 1t is
very simple. Simple remedies were
formerly popular. The simple pre-
ventives of today should have just as
much popularity. Be cautious, but
don't get scared to death" 1t is
worth trying this preventive. It is
cheap and the doctors and scientists
say it is very effective.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
rFrom the chicago News. !

LFrom the Chicago News.
Politics and morality are seldom on
Speaking terms.
Many a so-cailed orator is merely a
human photograph.
Love is a disease that nothing short
of marriage will cure.
Cupid makes a mistake when he
crafts bud on an old shrub.
When you meet a stranger get busy
and tell your troubles first.
But for the limelight many a theat-
rical star would cease to shine.
It's pity a man can't put a plaster
on his conscience when Il hurts him.
A vegetarian says that his good
health is the result Of eating no meat
and chewing IL we'll.
There would be fewer old bachelors e
single men were not allowed to asso-
ciate with married men.
After a boy has spent a year at col
lege he resembles the pictures in ready
made clothing advertisements.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
JOURNAL ENTRIES

That a good cry is healthful is a
poor excuse for one on the part of a
groWn-up.
Many persons are at their best
when they do not participate in con-
verSations.
Human beings are really handicap
ped by not knowing the extent of
their limitations.
a X
The people who try to say funny
things generally meet with little sue
cess in that line.
X
Lots of individuals think they
would like to live without working
but they would find such to be a
dreary existence.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
Gets s25. 600 for Kindness.

Miss Ella Thrasher, housekeeper at
the Antlers hotel, received a check
Sunday for $4,000 as a reward for
kindness bestowed on an invalid old
man some time ago. The invalid
turned out to be the late w, E. Tillot-
son of Massachusetts. He left here a
year ago for. Los Angeles, Cal, where
he died soon after.
He lived long enough, however, 20
provided for the kind-hearted house
keeper, who, without knowledge of his
wealth and without hope of reward,
anticipated his wants and ministered
to his comfort during short term he
spent as sufferer at the AntlerS
hotel Miss Thrasher says she will not
resign as housekeeper, but viii rake a
vacation and visit her old rome n
England.-CoIorado Springs dispatch
to New York Times
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers OF the State Journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
20 any address at the rate Of ten
cents a week or thirty cents a month
(by mail only.) Address changed as
often as desired. While out of town
the state Journal will be to you like
a daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
LOOKING FORWARD.

It is said that the North Pole will be
soon discovered by means Of an air
ship.
This is important whether it is true
or not. It transfers the interest in the
North Pole from reindeer and dog sleds
to spark plugs and screws. If the pre-
diction is correct the News will soon be
advertising summer excursions 'over
the North Pole in an airship," instead
of advising the people to go to Colorado
or Mackinac or Riverside Park The
June bride will take the June bride
groom on a wedding tower across the
Arctic circle. and the Harvey eating
house system will establish the sand
witch station in balloons moored along
the line usually taken by the Hutchin-
son. Behring Sea and Polar Airship
line. Wrecks on interurban or steam
railroads will be regarded as unimpor-
tant. and the real sensation viii be
when the North Pole express punctures
a gas bag or breaks a carbureter, and
the passengers are dumped a mile or
two into the snow of Greenland's icy
mountains.
Perhaps all this will come to pass
within a few years, or 1t may take an
other generation to get accustomed to
the waterless ship just as the one now
on earth has seen the success of the
horseless riages.-Hutchinson News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
LFrom the New York Press.I

from the New York Press.
The more man can fool a woman
the more it's because she wants to be
all.
II a man wa~rs a necktie that
matches his girls ribbon IT convinces
her how delightfully."- he makes love.
A girl takes II for granted that II
she was much prettfer she couldn't help
being a little vain about 1t.
When a woinan's garter comes un-
done it's a sign she will try to make a
man think she is taking a burr out OF
her skirt.
It's next to impossible for most peo-
pie to realize that when a rich man is
hungry he can like steak and fried pO-
tatoes just the way they do
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

consumers are after. They do not
care to have the burdens on them
left where they are. They want them
reduced materially. That's what Mr..
Taft promised them when he was
running for the presidency, but it has
been quite evident for some time
that Mr.. Taft was not speaking, in
this respect, for the other prominent
leaders of the Republican party, and
especially those of them in congress.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

London newspapers hold up theI'
hands In horror at the sensationalism
of sor,a of their American contem-
poraries. But it is, not likely that any
American sheet ever went any farther,
or quite so far to 5rag the name Of a
prominent man into any case as did an
English newspaper recently which
spoke of a London suicide as having
been "the divorced husband of the
stepdaughter of a deceased uncle of
Theodore Roosevelt"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Pretty soon now there is apt to be
a crop shortage-but it will be in the
nature of shortage in freight cars
which will be needed to haul to the
markets the real crops that are turn
ing out to be more bountiful than
even their most optimistic friends
honed for.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Just because Mr.. Aldrich says he
does not read what the newspapers
have to say about him, 1t is not likely
that the papers will pay any less atten-
ton to him. Many public men are not
overly particular with their statements
about things. But one thing is a surety
in this connection. Mr.. Aldrich does
not pay any heed to what the newspa-
pers say him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

things so that he can stop for short
periods at many of the small towns
on the route he will take from Wash
ington for his trip to the Pacific
coast during the early fall. Well, the
small towns are willing. In fact, they
would be UNNECESSARILY delighted to
entertain him for minute or a day
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

For a considerable period the metro
poIitan water and sewerage commits
sion of Massachusetts, has followed the
practice of COMPRISING into blocks
the material screened out from the
sewage before it enters the pumps,
and utilizing it for fuel beneath their
boilers They early learned, however,
that the brick work was burned out
very rapidly when this fuel was used
in connection with the externally fired
boilers. On the other hand, it was
found to have no effect upon the steel
plates. AS a result, internally fired
boilers have been adopted--Denyer
Municipal Facts.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Many Chicagoans. so 1t is reported.
are not legally married because justices
of the peace who had no authority to
act of1ciated at their weddings. In
several instances of this sort, it is rea-
sonable to assume that the divorce
courts OF the Windy City will be saved
a lot of trouble. For others, who are
happily married. though, the situation
is rather serious.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

The latest American heiress. Miss
Anita Stewart Of New York, will prob
ably get a little excitement for her
money. In her case she is going 10
cast her lot with Prince Miguel of
Braganza, who is the son of the pre-
tender to the Portuguese throne. Still,
her chances of becoming a real queen
by this route are not overly bright
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Here's work for Roosevelt. A mes
600 of the c. D. @. variety should be
sent to him by means Of the monkey
post. Man-eating lions have made an
invasion of a bit of territory in British
Fast A frica
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Topeka, is often wont to boast of
her public schools and such boasting
is not in vain. But, then, they ought
to be excellent ones. Half of the
taxes collected each year for the city
are devoted to the purposes of these
schools
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

An unusual old colored woman died
the other day in Georgia. She was III
years old and had never been known to
claim that she had seen George Wash
ington. A distinguishing monument
should be erected to her memory.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

In a recent issue of the Observatore
Romano, the organ of the Vatican, is
q scathing denunciation of the ten
denotes of feminine fashion of today.
But this probably won't do any good.
Feminine fashions have been assailed
on all sides, except by the women VINO
indulge in them, ever since they have
developed to their P~~~ent ridiculous
peculiarities. The members of the fair
sex. however, have gone bhthely on
their way indulging their whims for
dress as their fancy is suited.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

The Chicago News remarks with
all modesty that Chicago is becoming
the literary center of the coun
And it does not forget to add. which,
unfortunately, is not saving much
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Mr.. Aldrich says that the senate
tariff bill, If enacted into law, would
not impose additional burdens upon
the consumer. Even granted that
this is so, although there are many to
dispute this allegation and they have
good grounds. that is not what the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Knicker-Do you think Shakespeare was
a lawyer? Bocker-No; If he had been he
would have made a fortune deciding
whether Hamlet was mad.-New York Sun
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Suffragette-Wha is a party without
women? Mere Man (flippantly)--A stag
sir, would this nation be without women
but tagnation.-Iife.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Prisoner-Can speak with the Convict
Smith for one moment? Jailer-No, he has
just left. after finishing his time. But ask
me again in about a week-Fliegende
Blaetter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

1.-The Rev. Mr. Hustler's church is GER
tainly up to date Indeed. HoW?''
'Why, he calls his vesper services matinees
and the ushers take up the collection with
cash registers. Boston Transcript
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-07-13

Her-You never dream of getting mar
ried. I suppose. Him-Oh! yes-after I've
eaten Welsh rabbit.-Cleveland Leader