davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
AN IMPRACTICAL JOKER.
He Thought It Was Very Funny to
Fire the Rayrick.

He Thought II Was Very Funny e
Fire the Hayrick.
Practical joking, "the meanest form
Of wit" is common In Hungary. For
merly the pranks used to be coarse,
II not dangerous, but that Is changing
now. The only saving grace Of the
Magyarian practical jokes. says w. B.
F. Bovill In Hungary and the Hun
garians," is that they are not perpe-
trated In spirit Of bitterness.
One Of the most famous Jokers Of the
old school was Jozsa Gyurl. Exiled
in one Of the most inaccessible parts
Of the great plain, he lived and died
"a prodigal and buffoon."
A story Is told Of Jozsa going to
spend night with Count Keglevich.
Wishing to be impressive, he journey
ed thither in a beautiful new coach, of
which he was very proud. On being
shown over the grounds by the count
his attention was directed to remark
ably fine hayrlck. Hay was then
standing at good price. After sup
per Jozsa drew together some friends,
and the rick was soon nothing but
heap Of ashes.
The next morning when Jozsa want
ed to continue bis journey his wen-
derful carriage was not to be seen
anywhere.
"Why, my friend" said the count
'you yourself burnt it last night. The
fact Is my coach house wants repair
ing, and as the evening threatened to
be wet we put your carriage under
the rick to keep It dry"
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Fhe WUman's Home Communion
For Septe M her

A big section Of the unusually bis
lumber Is devoted to fashions. Ex-
'erts IL Paris and famous tailors and
nilliners in the United States have,
With Grace Margaret Gould's know
edge Of the American woman's tastes,
made the Issue one that women will
preserve tor many months. Not only
towns, coats, hats and waists, but the
important little things, shoes. hosiery,
fabrics, trimmings. coiffures-all are
exclusively handled.
There are plenty OF good stories 10
the issue for these last hot days
stories by Octave Thanet, Mrs. John
Van Worst, Katharine Holland Brown.
Mary Heaton worse, and others. illus
trated by such artists as James Mont
gomery Flagg and Alice Barber Steph-
ems. Kate Douglas Virgins serial
story Of the Shakers, Susanna aud
Sue" is also in this issue. For the
theatre goer, Walter Prichard Eaton's
article, 1.-The Decent Stage" will prove
a splendid guide, giving list OF the
good, clean, successful plays that will
appear outside OF New York this fall.
In Reluctant Percentage" DIR. Woods
ii Hutchinson startles us with new ideas
about the Race Suicide" question.
de shows all the aspects OF this big
problem and eventually proves that
It isn't really problem at ell.
The children's department Is even
bigger than usual. There are many
ages devoted to embroidery and other
hand work. Fannie Merritt Farmers
cooking pages are full of new ideas,
nd all the other regular departments
re as good rs they always are.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
The Descending Scale.

THE first letter John ever wrote Il
me-" said married woman to bel
friend. was shortly after we had be
come acquainted and before there was
really anything like an understanding
between us. This Is the way he signed
It:
Yours. my dear Miss Weston. mos,
sincerely.
JOHN HAMILTON EAsTON.
"There. you see, were ten words
enough for telegram-just to bring a
commonplace friendly letter to an end
But after we became engaged his first
letter to me was signed In this way:
"Yours. my darling. affectionately
JOHN
'That, you will observe, was re-
duction of 80 per cent from his uncIu.
sion as q mere friend. The first letter
he ever wrote to me after we were
married was signed:
"Yours, JOHN"
She stopped for moment and
sighed and then continued:
I'VE have been married seventeen
years now. Yesterday l received a let
ter from him. Here is the way it was
signed:
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
A Tomboy Princess.

1.-The tomboy princess of Europe"
what they call Anastasia, grand duch
ess Of Mecklenberg- Schwerin. No on
can guess what she will do next
Brought up I'm the most punctiliou
way, related to nearly every reignini
house of the old world, she Is as un
conventional as a country girl who ha
never been off the farm. She goei
about public places unchaperoned
plays tennis with anybody. manages
motorboats. rides in tournaments. play
pranks on all sorts of people an(
actually wears trousers when thu
fancy strikes her. She Is often seel
in fantastic garb riding motorcycle
Withal she Is beautiful and fascinat
ing and is the mother Of two smart
daughters.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Settled the Dual.

Lord March, afterward the Marquis
Of Queensberry, was not accustomed
to view a duel with unbecoming ap.
prehension and usually attended an
affair with an air Of enjoyment that
often was decidedly dlspleasing and
embarrassing to his adversary. But
he was served at last with that sauce
which the proverb explains is for the
gander as well as for the goose. 1t
was when he was challenged to fight
an Irish sportsman. Lord March ap-
peared on the ground accompanied by
a second, surgeon and other witnesses.
His opponent arrived soon afterward
with a similar retlnue. but added to
by person who staggered under the
weight Of polished oak coffin. which
he deposited on the ground. end up
with Its lid facing Lord March and his
party. Lord March became decidedly
when he read the in
scription plate. engraved with his own
name and title and the date and year
Of death. and peace was patched up.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Live Spiders Food For Young Wasps

Live Spiders Food For Young Wasps.
The young of some wasps can live
only on live spiders. and the mother
wasp therefore renders the spider
powerless by her sting, after which II
can live a month, and then deposits It
In the cocoon where she has laid her
egg. On batching out the wasp grubs
feed on the bodies Of the living spi-
ders. Another wasp deposits her egg
In the body Of the spider. which is
then buried alive and is fed upon by
the wasp grub.-London Standard.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Scarinu the Conscience.

OF all her curious customs London
cannot boast Of more singular one
than that formerly so strictly adhered
to at Holland House. one of the most
historic old mansions In the British
capital. The last Of the Lords Holland
shot himself during Gt of despond-
ency. Everything pointed to a clear
case Of self murder. yet the Holland
family could never be dissuaded from
the notion that the old man had been
murdered by some unknown assassin.
Accordingly every night for years 1t
was the custom for one of the family
to so to the rear Of the house punctu
ally at IL O'Clock and fire gun for the
purpose. 1t Is said, Of soaring the con
science" Of the murderer This curl
Gus practice Is a relic of medieval
days In continental Europe, and the
case in point is probably the only In
stance where 1t has been noticed since
the days Of the crusades.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
PAJAMAs FOR BEDTIME.

Of a frilly lingerie CONNECTION. The
wide straw brim really does keep the
glare out Of her eyes. while the other
never does. You know doctors say
that most Of the cases of nearsighted.
ness and astigmatism come from poor.
ly protected eyes during the first sum-
mers of q child's life.
Never let the little one go out in the
sun without wearing hat. But let
the little girl be as much Of tomboy
as she likes. Turn her loose during
the summer months like young colt
and let her grow and lay in stores Of
strength for the shut-in months.
MARY WENTWORTH.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Pigeons, Air Sacks.

The air sacks Of the pigeon, sayl
Bruno Muller. constitute a system o.
interspaces the value of which lies II
their emptiness-that is, absence OF
weight and resistance. Flying is pos
sible only to body Of high mechan
ical efficiency. and we attain this will
machines Invested Of all superfuous
material. Just so the original reptiles
which by evolution became birds, were
Invested Of superfiuous material. and
the body spaces thus obtained were
filled with air sacks The body wall.
adapting itself to the mechanical re-
quirements. became a hollow cylinder
serving as support for the organs Of
movement. the mobility of whose parts
was assured by the surrounding air
sacks. The air cavities in the bones Of
birds are similarly explained.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
:. Woman :.
Features in this Column:
Summer Tips to Mothers
Health Dress For Girls
Let Life Be Fancy Free

Dress the small girl sensibly during
the hot weather. Many parents think
this Is the time to show the child Off
by covering 1t with stilfly starched
| lingerie ornamented with heavy rib
| bon bows.
Who does not remember the agony
OF stiffiy starched skirts OIL warm
day? And don't you remember how
the edges Of those immaculate hounces
scratched until you fidgeted so that
every one wondered why you were so
cross? TO this day hate a starched
.ruffle on anything as result Of what
suffered as Il child.
The summer months are precious
ones as regards the growth Of the
small child. Little girls should run
wild in the fields and sunshine with.
out ever seeing company clothes until
the warm days are over.
Some parents are sensible in this re-
spect. They dress the little girls the
same as little boys; you cannot tell the
difference. Both children wear romp.
eio anu uib III tue sduu anu Olrt uutu
they are as brown as berries.
One mother who put her child's
health before her appearance dressed
her in a bathing suit all summer. and
she was well repaid by the glow of
health In her baby's cheeks and by the
absence of the doctor all that winter.
Don't smother the little girl In lot
Of clothes. Some mothers are so APP
prehensive that their babies will catch
cold that they force them to wear fan
mel petticoats and long stockings.
They don't realize that by doing this
they are making the child delicate and
much more apt to become overheated
and easily chilled.
! believe very much IN the present
fad of making both little girls and lit
tie boys wear pajamas.
This is sensible, as children will
persist In kicking Off the bedclothes. |
and it is during the night that they |
catch the most cold.
Another thing-buy broad brimmed |
straw hat for your little girl instead
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
NJ " Norfolk 6 Western
SCHEDULE IN Reflect. JUNE 20, 1909
LEAVE BUENA VISTA

2.20 p.m.-For Bristol and informed.
late stations. Pullman Buffet sleep.
er to Bristol. Connects at Roanoke
with st. Louis Express for all points
West. Pullman Sleeper Roanoke to
Columbus, and Cincinnati Cafe Car.
|. I'll a.m.-For Roanoke. Bluefield,
Pocahontas. Norton, Winston Salem,
Charlotte, WEIGH and intermediate
stations. Pullman Sleeper to Gary.
Cafe Dining Car.
1.57 pm.-Fpr Hagerstown, Phila-
delphia. New York. Pullman Buffet
Sleepers via Ha9erstown for Harris
burg, Philadelphia and New York.
1885 p.m.--For Hay Philadel.
phia and New York Pullman Sleeper to
Philadelphia and New York.
Rates, time tables and information
cheerfully furnished upon application
to Agent N. & w. Ry.
W. B. BEVILL,
Gen. Pass. Agt. M.F. BRAGG,
Roanoke, Va. Trav. Pss.Ag
Jan. IS, '09
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Scribner's Magazine for Month
of September


of September
Scribner's Magazine for September
contains a number Of articles that are
OF unusual importance about present
day affairs. The leading article, fol
,Iample. by Montgomery SCHUYLER, de-
scribes most entertainingly 1.-THE Evo
luton Of the Sky-Scraper." 1t is Just
twenty years sipce the earliest exam
pie of skeleton construction was
erected at No. 80 Broadway. New
York, Already the building Is coming
down to make way for a building
thirty-eight stories In height.
Speculation and Stock Exchanges"
is a very informing article. by Samuel
H. Ordway, member OF Govern Or
Hughes Investigating Commission, the
report Of which has already borne fruit
In several voluntary reforms.
Professor Laughlln's much discussed
series on latter day problems is repre-
scented in this number by a very fair
discussion OF SOCIAL Settlements" aud
the work they should do in city. with
excellent suggestions as to their meth
DDS.
Among the short stories are:
'The Experimental" by Georgia
Wood Pangborn, a tale which will be
81 interest to vivlsectionists.
1.-THE Lifted Bandage," By Mary RS.
Andrews, author Of 1.-THE Perfect Trib-
ute," a story of remarkable spiritual
quality.
1.-THE Luck OF Book Farmer" by
John r. Spears-a romance Of a young
man who combined scientiff: farming
with courtship.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
JaXeIle Water.

Wherever water Is used In preparing
bleaches It should be soft. The 'alkail
In hard water affects all chemical sub
stances. Javelle water is q standard
preparation for bleaching white things
and removing spots and stains, but 1t
must not touch colored surfaces. To
make It dissolve half a pound Of wash
ing soda In pint Of boiling water and
mix It with quarter pound Of chloride
OF lime dissolved In quart OF boiling
water Stir well, let settle, pour OF
tas clear liquid and keep closely eerked
in a dark place.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Heart Not For Sale,

Miss Katherine Wright. the devoted
sister of the Wright brothers and
who with them met crowned heads
abroad, has announced that she will
probably 30 back to teaching in one OF
the high schools Of Dayton. o. One
of the stories about this agreeable and
sensible young lady is that soon after
her return home she had an offer OF
marriage from a millionaire. She Is
reported to have said, HE found there
was one thing that money couldn't
buy"
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
A No1A For thu Truth.

Exact truthfulness according to q
writer In the London Sketch, had tn
proper reward in the following In
stance:
Teacher-Now, can you tell me what
the olfactory organ Is? Boy-Piease,
sir, no, sir. Teacher-Quite right.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Virginia Polytechnic Institute
BLACKSBURu VA.

Degree courses In Agriculture, Horti.
culture, Applied Chemistry, Applied
Geology, Civil, Mining, Mechanical und
Electrical Engineering, Mstallurgy and
Metallogre ply, and Preparatory Veter-
mary Medicine. Sixty.foui Instructors,
Thoroughly Equipped Shops. Lsbora-
tories and Barns. Steam heating and
electric lights IN dermitories. Library
$4,000 volumes. Farm Of LOO acre
SCHOOL OF AGRICULTURAL APPRENTICES
Zone Year Course for Young Farmers)
Total cost OF session OF nine months,
including tuition and other fees, board,
washing. upifcrms, medical attendance,
etc., $4,000. Cost OF Virginia stu
dents, $226. 90.
The next sessions opens Wednesday,
September 32nd, 1902.
PAUL B. BARRINGRR, Md, LID.
JAY 2 % Z me President
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Baltimore s Ohio R. R.
SCHEDULE IN EfFKOr MAY 30, 1909
LEXINGTON
All Trains Daily Except Sunday

HARRISONBURG, WINCHESTER,
CHARLESTOWN and HAkPER'S
FERRY, Depart 400 a. M, 1900 noon
100 p. IN. Arrive 500 p. m,
CHICAGO, Depart 400 q. M, 1900
noon. Arrive 500 p. m.
PITTSBURG. Depart 400 am 1900
noon.
WASHINGTON 4 BALTIMORE, De-
part 400 a. No., 1900 noon 1870 p. m.
Arrive 800 p. IN.
HhGERSTOWN 4 FREDERICK,
Depart 400 a. 10. Arrive 900 p. m.
apr 500.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08

bladder remedy, be-
cause of its remark
able health restoring
properties. Swamp
Root fulflls almost
every wish in over
coming rheumatism,
pain in the b"ck, kid
neys, liver, bladder
and every part of the
urinary passage. 1t
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Touch Skin.

CUMBERLAND now comes professor
who declares that fruit is Just as
HEALTHY with the skin on as Il 10 pes,ed.
Guyer- HIM! I'd like to see somebcdv
start him on diet Of pineapple
Chicago News.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Tonsorial Triumph.

What was the best job you ever
did?" inquired the first barber.
II once shaved man." replied the
second ditto.
"WelI?"
well, then persuaded him to have
hair cut, SINCE. shampoo. face mas
sage. sea foam, electric buzz. tar spray
and finally tonic rub"
what thenY"
"By that time" concluded barber
No. 2, "he needed another shave
London Answers
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08

Binghamton, NY. The regular fifty.cent
and one-dollar size bottles are sold by
all druggists. Don't make any mistake
but remember the name, Swamp-Ro
DR.. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, and the adj
dress, Binghamton, N. y, on every bottle.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08

Great thoughts reduced b psscttce
Ihesoms great ts.-.1aSattt.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08

hold wat. al;l scaling psi1 in passingit,
or bad effects following use Of liquor, wine
or beer, and ovcrcouies that unpleasant
necessity of being compelled to go often
through the day, and to get up many
times during the night.
Swamp-RoOt is not recommended for
everything but if you have kidney, liver
or bladder trouble, it will be found just
the remedy you need. 1t has been thor-
oughly tested in private practice, and has
proved so successful that special ar
rangenent has been made by which all
readers of this paper, who have not al
ready tried it, may have q sample bottle
sent free by mail, also book telling
more about Swanp-Root, and how to
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08

fndoutifyouha have kid
ney or bladder trouble
When writing mention
reading this generous
offer in this paper and
send your address to
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Do You Get Up
With a Lame Back?
Kidney Trouble Makes You Miserable.

Almost everyone knows of Dr.. Kilmer's
Swamp-R Root, the great kidney, liver and
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1909-09-08
Great Reduction In
MILLINERY
NOW

/ also have nice line of White
Goods ard Embroi Ieries, Val
Laces, etc. that l am going to
sell at very low prices Want to
close out my v hite Goods and
Emb, oideriee;ueed more time and
space for millinery Have a nice
line of Kid Gloves AMI Silk
Give. Fancy IAos both silk and
lis" II. {. iDie ! laid Top soca S
il large nd small sizes for ,'hilG.
rem Call and look over my line
B. N. HUTTON
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-05-07

We can save you money on that lum-
Der bill
J.B. wHELAN & CO.. III E. 4th.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-05-07
COUNTY CLERK HAS $4,000 EARS.
Bounty on Jack Rabbits Responsible
for Wonderful Showing.

Great Bend. Kan. May 7.-Out in
Ford county they have a bounty on
jack rabbits. Since the bounty was
placed on rabbits in this county, six
months ago. the ears of over $4,000
jack rabbits have been delivered 10
the county clerk. and the cents per
bounty paid amounts to over 800.
1t win amount to a pretty good sized
sum in year. but it seems to be a
necessity to get rid of the rabbits.
Edwards county has just decided to
quit paying the bounty on rabbits
and it is TO hoped that the rabbits OF
that county will not get offended al
the action and move over the line into
Ford county. Persons who have ex-
pressed themselves on the matter seem
to think that the bounty should be
kept up until the rabbits are thinned
out If it fails the experiment
might be tried here which is said tc
have been a success in some other
countries. that of using a preparation
which gives the rabbit that gets 1t &
contagious disease, and once started
keeps going.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-05-07

child and carried her into the sitting
room, only to find that the little one
had been fatally burned. The entire
body had been scared by the blaze
and the flesh literally cooked. The
child died after terrible suffering in a
few hours
Mrs. Tough had put her to steep in
her cradle and thought while she was
asleep she would go to the store to get
some things. taking her other three
little girls with her.
/ While she was gone the little one
awoke and crawled out and pushed a
! chair up to the dresser, which is a
very high one, and upset the lamp,
splitting oil on her and soon she was
afire. The baby. suffering terribly and
wrapped in flame, crawled over into
the corner. where she was found.
On their return from the store they
| noticed that there was an unusually
bright light in the house and they ran
quickly and found what was done.
They grabbed the child and put out
| the flames but not until it had been
severely burned about the breast and
arms and mouth. The doctor was
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-05-07
SURPRISING CONDITIONS
A CITY WHERE GRAY HAIR.
ED PEOPLE RIDICULE THE
OSLER THEORY.

carload of Q-Ban Hair Restorer
and Tonic was bought by one firm
of retail druggists in Omaha City. Evil
IDENTIFY the gray heads and those peo-
pie possessing this straggly hair lfv-
ing in Omaha City are commencing to
realize that the advantage of preserv-
ing youthful appearance Is not to be
lightly disregarded. DR.. Osler's theory
may be wrong, but nevertheless, many
men have failed to secure a position
that otherwise they might have secured
but for the gray hairs that announced
the approach of loss of energy and
youth Who makes the best impress
sion on the employer seeking help
the man with gray hair. or the man
with a youthful head of hair? The use
of Q-Ban Hair Restorer can make
some people look as If twenty years
had been rolled back for them.
One writer testifles to the fact tina,
a two-weeks' course restored the few
gray hairs he had to the original col.
do the same for you after using SIX
bottles, your money will be refunded
by the druggist OF whom you buy the
preparation. We claim for the Hail
Tonic that 1t will keep your scalp In
healthy condition and will increase
the length of the hair at least three
inches per year until the limit OF
growth has been reached.
Marshall Bros, End and Kansas Ave
and 5th and Kansas Ave-, Recommend
and sell these preparations. If yol
are gray haired or If your hair Is com
| mencing to fade in color. you can have
| the first package for nothing-simplI
| call and ask for it.