davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
ar..klro LIN q Witness.

In no way can barristers better dis
play their acuteness than by seeing at
a glance tue character of the wit
nesses they are about to examine and
by treating them accordingly. Erskine
was famous at this. In case in
which he was engaged commercial
traveller came into the witness box
dressed in the height Of fashion and
wearing starched white neektie fold
ed in the Brummel fold. In an in
slant Erskine knew his man, though
he had never seen him before, and said
to him, with an air of careless amuse-
ment, "You were born and bred in
Manchester, l perceive" Greatly as
tonished at this opening remark, the
man admitted that he was. "Exactfy,"
observed the great cross examiner in
a conversational tone 81 knew 1t
from the absurd tie Of your neck
cloth"
The roars of laughter, coming from
every person in the court with the
single exception of the unfortunate
witness. which followed this rejoindef
completely effected Erskine's purpose,
which was to put the witness in a
state Of agitation and confusion be-
fore touching on the facts concerning
which he had come to give evidence
London News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Roarlno MuscIes.


eff writer wrote of roaring mus
cles, you would laugh at him. Joints
crack, the stomach thunders. but mus
cles, you would say, don't roar That
is your mistake. They do
The speaker, a physician. put his
finger in his ear.
81 hear a muscle roaring now" said
he. 'Try 1t, and you, too, will hear the
sound. And to prove that It is the
sound of muscle, put a plug Of wood
Ia your ear instead, and you will bear
nothing.
Contracted muscles give out roar
ing sound. Relaxed muscles are 81
lent. This fact is Of use in diagnos-
ing certain diseases. The stethoseope
makes the muscular roars audible, and
those strange voices proclaim the pres
ence Of such diseases as tetanus, men
nights or strychnine poisoning, while
silence on the muscles part is, so to
speak, suIlen admission of the pres
ence in their midst of atrophy, degen-
GRAFTON, paralysis Buffalo Express.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
cannibaI Cows.

"Now, children" said the pretty
teacher, II want you all to write a
composition on the cow You know
what COW is. You know that COW
gives us all the milk we drink. Now,
write me something original about the
COW as you know her, nothing COM
monplace." 1t would take several pages
to print the results, but there Is room
for at least one composition by girl
of seven:
"A COW is quadruped having four
legs and four feet She gives milk and
sometimes has horns, but not always.
The cows baby is called a calf and
sometimes bossy. When COW talks
she lows. A COW with horns can hook,
but COW without horns is helpless. A
cow is carnivorous animal when she
has chance, but she ordinarily eats
grass, If there is any. A COW is can
nibal if you let her alone, for she will
eat her own kind"
The Mortified teacher exclaimed: "Sal-
lie May, where on earth did you get the
idea, the ridiculous idea, that a COW
is carnivorous and a cannibal? You
meant to say that COW is herbivorous
or graminlvorous."
mo, teacher. read 1t in the Holy
Bible. Don't you remember there were
seven fire fat cows feeding near a
brook and seven lean and hungry cows
came and ate them up? See Genesis
XII, A."
Teacher reserved decision.-New Yor,i
Press.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
ESTABLISHED 1875

should ask for Miss or Mrs Lang, and
when the door opened he sIurred the
prefix and laid emphasis upon the
name Miss Lang was at home, and
he presently found himself comforta-
bly, seated and awaiting her advent.
He glanced mechanically about the
tastefully appointed room; then there
was step on the stair. and he turned
to behold tall girl in a black lace
dinner gown and with a spray Of
holly caught in her dark hair
your he cried.
She came forward, a half shamed,
wholly mischievous expression on her
face.
II suppose owe you an apology"
she said. ''You see. fully intended to
own up before you reached the city
you were so deliciously funny that I
simply couldn't beforehand then you
mentioned your cousin. Maud Cart
wright, who is my best friend, and
knew that you must be Bobby's
cousin, of whom I've heard all my
life. And so''-she darted a mirthful
glance at him from under her dark
lashes-"and so, well, the temptation
was too overwhelming. | have heard
of you in variety Of roles, but never
before as a restorer of buildings" She
held out her hand. please try quite
hard to forgive me-" she finished In
assumed contrition.
They looked at each other, and both
broke into a merry peal Of laughter.
''You," cried Cartwright when he
could speak-"you led me this wild
goose chaser He tried to summon a
reproachful air.
She raised one hand and plucked
tall rose from vase on the manteI.
Her mouth was drawn into demure
lines, but her eyes danced wickedly.
Then she held out to him the long
stemmed rose.
al had to punish you for calling me
a gorgon and believing me to be such
a dreadful looking creature. The score
Is not SO uneven, is it7"
They looked at each other above the
rose and laughed again.
81 will even it up, my Christmas
lady," declared Cartwright Then his
voice fell into a humber tone. "And
with Cousin Maud to introduce me
may come againT
Z ."Are you sure that Bobby Cart
wright is your cousin7"
positive"
'Well, l have invited Bobby and
Maud and the cousin who was expect.
ed to Christmas dinner. We are to
have the pudding. but perhaps 1t
would not agree with you after what
has happened"
FOOD for the godsr' cried Cart
wright. "Giye me a chance at that
pudding. 1t will afford very excel
lent substitute for humble pie"
1t was showing heavily when Cart
wright reached the street, but he
plunged resolutely into the storm.
Heavenly pudding he cried with
enthusiasm, Il must relinquish you,
but l viii not give you up so easily,
my Christmas lady"
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
What Generosity Means.

"Many people get the credit of being
generous who never felt a single gen
erous impulse In their lives" says a
close student Of human nature.
''Their generosity. so called. has con-
sisted simply In formal, cold, grudging
almsgiving, carried out at the call Of
duty and unaccompanied by any spon-
taneous burst of feeling or sympathy.
"The highest generosity is full Of
strong, unhesitating self effacement and
always inspires. except in debased ma
lures, feelings of gratitude and affee-
ton Almsgiving is one of the least
Of its attributes. 1t more often takes
the form Of helpfulness, sympathy and
understanding. 1t gives forth compass
ION and encouragement of kind
which Is far beyond money value.
THE secret of generosity is unself1sh-
ness, and the way to acquire it is to
cultivate universal love and sympathy"
st Paul Pioneer Press.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

Vandlver's gray curls gave her a Gu
rious look of youth. "Why, James,
she faltered, did you really remem
ber?"
EYES," said the judge, feeling thai
had he never forgotten life would
have held deeper meanings.
Mrs. vandiver came around and
kissed her husband. ''Thank you
dear" she said, with a gentleness
that made Roxane stare.
After that 1t was not hard to pro
pose ride by moonlight, and Mrs
Vandiver, consenting, came down In Q
blue gown that became her elderly
plumpness almost as we'll as that 9th.
er blue gown had set off her girlish
figure.
The judges electric runabout re-
placed the buggy Of long ago, and as
they went quickly through the city
and out into the country roads that
astute gentleman refrained from any
mention Of Oliver and Roxane. All
his talk was of things Of the past
"How happy we were, Abbie," be
said at last, and his wife responded
wistfully, very happy. James,"
A golden moon hung above the dark
line of the hills. The air was sweet
with the spiciness of the pines. The
judge was thrilled with bygone emo
lions, and his arm was comfortably
about. his wife's waist.
Then in the rapture of the restora-
ton to her place of romance Of the
Abbie Of long ago he forgot Oliver
forgot Roxane
He was brought back with a shock
when Mrs. Vandiver said as they
turned toward home: 'I've been think
ing of Roxane If she really loves
Oliver l don't know but ought
"Of course you ought" said the
Judge promptly. "Give them your
blessing, and let them be as happy as
we are"
II am afraid that Oliver has been
fooled by some of those firms who
hunt up lost heirs" the lady pursued
"Of course Oliver was sincere, but
don't think much of the fortune sto-
ry"
NO." mendaciously, at didn't seem
probable"
you can settle something on them
after they are married." said Mrs.
Vandiver. 1--WE haven't any one to
leave 1t to but Roxane-and-an it
would be nice to have them engaged
on the same day that we were, jim
mie."
Jimmie! The magic of the youthful
appellation made the judge feel like a
colt
Lets get them married and you
and l will go off and have another
honeymoon" he proposed jubilantly.
I'VE will have the time of our lives"
The ripple that came from his wife's
lips was silver echo of the golden
laughter OF other days.
''We WILL" she said and lifted her
face to him in the moonlight, land
now let's go right home and tell the
children, Jimmie"
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
n Ia WaII.

1t is well to carefully cultivate tastes.
Ruskin says, Tell me what you like
and will tell you what you are
1t is well to study human character
Bodenstedt says: in the face Of ev-
ery human being his history stands
plainly written; his innermost nature
steps forth to the light. Yet they are
the fewest who can read and under
stand"
1t is well to brush up against the
world Goethe says: Talent forms
itself in secret Character is the great
current of the world"
1t is well to be never cast down
Elizabeth Barrett Browning says:
Let no one till his death
Be called unhappy. Measure not the work
Until the days out and the labor done
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
1mpulsIve Polly sprang forward ane

Tmpulsive Polly sprang forward and
clasped the hand of her hostess.
"You are SO splendid. wish could
say what feep'- And then, catching
the light of pair of hazel eyes watch
ing her above the telephone book, she
said "Ohw very suddenly and turned
her face the other way.
1t was II. The couple from the floor
below who had come up for a game of
whist had taken their departure Mrs.
Baxter was making the rounds Of her
apartment to be sure that all was fast
against the storm, which still ragged
furiously. Polly and Roland stood in
the round bay window looking down
the storm blocked boulevard.
What cruel thing big storm ISL
said Polly.
"Not this storm. think it is the
finest old blizzard that ever blizzed. -
He tried hard to look into her eyes.
IF could just tell you what this
blizzard means to me-
He had been drawing her toward
him with his glance, but now she drew
back and summoned all her dimples.
please, please, not now, not here.
1t is your house, you see, and I'd have
to be polite"
"Don't you want to be potter urged
Roland Baxter significantly.
Il don't know. oh. you are not play
ing fair. It's so SOON
Nothing Of the Sort" interrupted
Roland recklessly. "It happened at 10
o'clock this morning. remember the
chimes ringing just as looked into
your eyes for the first time''
And again Polly Hess said "Ohr'
which, oddly enough, seemed to satisfy
her companion, for he dropped the
heavy curtains, blotting out all sight
Of the raging elements, and drew her
back into the circle of crimson shaded
lamplight.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
EnnIinn the nona.

In certain part Of Scotland. ac-
cording to Dean Ramsey, the shep-
herds used to take their collies with
them to church. The dogs behaved
well during the sermon, but began to
be restless during the last psalm and
saluted the final blessing with joyful
barks. In one church the congrega-
ton resolved to stop this unseemly
detail, so when a strange minister was
about to pronounce the blessing all re-
NAMED seated instead Of rising, as he
expected He hesitated and paused
till an old shepherd cried: "Say ava,
sir! We're a. sittin' to cheat the
dowgsy'
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Rrsakfastina with Whistler.

The was foreign painter who used
to breakfast at Chelsea, and when
Mr.. Carr asked him if he had been
there lately he replied: ''Oh, no; not
now SO much He ask me a leetle
while ago to breakfast, and l go. My
cab fare, two shilling, art crown.
arrive, very nice Goldfish In bowl,
very pretty. But breakfast-one egg,
one toast-no more! Oh, no. My cab
fare, two shilling, 'arf crown. For
me no moreg'-London Telegraph.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
,A,ho ~. Mound sulIders Were.

Who were the mound builders OF
North America? The Rev. DR.. Bryce
Of Winnipeg has examined a large
number of these interesting struc-
lures and is of the opinion that they
were built by the Toltecs and mark
the course of the Toltec immigration
from the south along the Mississippi
and Ohio to the great lakes and the
st. Lawrence, along the Missouri and
along the Mississippi proper to the
Rainy and Red rivers This would
make the earliest mound date from
about 100 A. D.-Boston Herald.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Sour MIX.

The milk was not Of the desired
sweetness one morning. and little Ell
mer pushed his glass away after TAX
ing sip:
whats the matter with the milk.
Elmer?' asked his mother
81 guess the milkman has been feed
ing his COW on pickles." was the re-
ply.-Exchange
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

During a snowstorm on the Highland
railway a train was held up for an
hour or two. The guard, a CHEEKY
Scot. passed along the carriages trying
to keep up the spirits Of the passen-
gers. An old gentleman angrfy COM
planned that If the train didn't go on
he would die Of cold"
"Tak' my advice an no dae that,
replied the guard. Min y, we
charge a shillin' mile for corpses =
Dundee Advertiser.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
The Honest Way.

money? Poohg' exclaimed sue
cessful financier contemptuously.
"There are hundred ways of making
money"
"Ah, but only one honest wayl' pro-
tested his companion.
whats thatg'
"Um! l thought you wouldn't know"
London Telegraph.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

81 don't mind finding a gray hair or
two In my own hair" sighed the
bachelor girl, who shows some few
signs of the scar and yellow leaf. but
when l pay So for nice bunch of
lovely brown curls and have to pick
them out Of those, too. it isn't fair.
Do you think it is?"-Chicago Inter
Ocean.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
nj. strono Point.

att is true" said friend that you
have amassed a great fortune. But
your grammar
ssNeyer mind the grammar said
Mr.. Dustin Stax This is an era OF
specifications may be weak in
some branches, but I'm an authority
on the possessive case. Washington
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

Some say kissing is sin, but If i
was ma lawful, lawyers would ma al
low it: If it was ma holy, ministers
would ma do it: if 1t was ma modest.
maidens would ma take it; If 1t was ma
plenty, puir folk would ma get IT..
Robert Rurns
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Located.

"Say." queried the would be humor
list, where is that place Atoms that
so many people are blown tor
sIt's just the other side of Efigy, the
place In which so many people are
hanged" answered the solemn person.
Chicago News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Faults on Both Sides.

He was a mild and meek kind Of
husband, but at length his patience
and good nature gave out, and he went
to his lawyer to get him to draw up a
deed of separation from his exasper-
ating better half
"Ah, WELL" said the lawyer thought
fully. perhaps there may be faults on
both sides"
you're rightr' shouted the angry
client "She has hump on her back
and a wart on her nose. New York
Times.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

Leave MOOREsTOWN every 70 minutes 81 t e.
nom 8 AZ until 1912 q. m; then every " min.
utes until AZ p. M; then every 70 minutes IN q
til $40 D. M; then every 80 minutes until LIZ
p. mi. then every hour as per nignt car
Leave FERRY sos, 6ss, SOS. sss a. m; then y
every is minutes until 9.38 O. MI then every "
min tites until 8.S8 p. m; then everylb minutes
until S38 p. m; then every " mlnntes UNI,
S l0.O6 D. M; then 1l.08 and 1z0o; then every
hour a. per night car schedule
Leave MERGHANTyILLEe every minutes es
from $50 q. m until Ell q. m; then every ~
minutes until "a p. M; then every minutes
until s.z7 p. M; then every ~ mlnuses unu'
Leave FERRY at sos and 636 q. m; tnen
every 10 minutes until 55s E. M; then a. every We.
s minutes until 858 q. M; then every ~ min
utes until 1858 D. M; then every minutes IN,
tti7.5S b. M; then every 10 minutes until lzuo
midnight; then every hour as per night car
schedule.
NIGHT CAR-DAILY AND SUNDAY.
Leave Moorestown, 1.02. Y02, 902 4.oz Q. M
Leave Ferry, *I08, 206, 80S, 4.08 Q. m.
sLast trip on Saturday nigh.
Connect with Mount Holly cars 81 stanWick
nVeune
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

@Foul tactics" declared the halfback
whats the trouble now?' demand
ed the referee.
81 tried kick for the stomach, but
this fellow blocked it with his head. -
Kansas City Journal.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

Castor burst like a whirlwind in
upon his friend Alphonse. VIII you
be my witnessY' he cried.
"Going to fight?"
"No; going to get married"
Alphonse after pause inquired,
"Can't you apologize ?'-Argonaut
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Good Behavior.

Employer why were you discharged
from your last place? Applicant For
good behavior. Employer What do
you mean by that? Applicability
took three months OF my sentence.r
Cleveland Leader
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
With a strlna.

"Do you trust your husband i'm
plicitlyT'
"What a question! Why, Of course l
do-to a certain extent" Cleveland
Leader.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

Whistler's financial affairs were the
mingled joy and terror of his friends,
and the Pencils. in their Life Of
Whistler" give most amusing
glimpse into this side of his life. On
one occasion he had actually run up
bill of 1900 with Chelsea green
grocer, who at last called to insist
upon payment. Whistler came out
strong on that occasion:
"How-w hat-why-why of course,
you have sent these things-most ex-
cellent things-and they have been
eaten. you know, by most excellent
people. Think what a splendid adver-
tisementl And sometimes, you know,
the salads are not quite up to tie
mark-the fruit. you know, not quite
fresh. And If you go into those I'M
seemly discussions about the BILL
well, you know. shall have to go into
discussions about all this, and think
how 1t would hurt your reputation
with all these extraordinary people /
think the best thing is not to refer to
the past-I'll let it go. And In the fu-
ture wen have weekly account
wiser, you know!"
The greengrocer left without his
money, but received In payment two
nocturnes, one the blue upright Val
paradise
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
rwn rransdies.

To a woman there are two TRACE
dies. One is not getting the man she
loves; the other is getting him. The
first is resignation, the second disillu-
sion.-New York Herald.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Induleent.

II have such an indulgent husband"
said little Mrs. Doll.
eyes, so George says" responded
Mrs. Splteful Sometimes iNdu'f es
dttle too much, doesn't he?-London
IN4 Di4e
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
The Burlington and Bristol Steamboat
and Ferry Company


Schedule in effect $40 q. M. December Il, 1905
Subject to change.
Daily, except Sundays and Christmas Day
LEAVE BRISTOL FOR BURLINGTON.
40. 400, 800, 1000, HOO a. M, HS0,
j $50, $50. $50, 49, $40, p. M.
LEAVE BURLINGTON FOR BRISTOL.
G6o. $50, $50, 1880, l1.ss, q. M, LOO, Zoo
800, 40. s 90. $50, p. M.
SUNDAYS AND CHRISTMAS DAY
First boat leaves Bristol at 500 =. M Last
boat leaves Bristol at $40 p. M
First boat leaves Burlington at $50 a. 10.
+ Last boat leaves Burlington at $50 p. m.
The $40 D. M. trip nom Bristol and the $50
%. 10. trip from Burlington on Sundays VIII
Be withdrawn when there is Ice In ths river.
NOTES.
The above trips VIII be run on schedule
time unless prevented by ice-when there II
ice in the river no trips will be guaranteed.
Il The boat for the performances in the Audi
torium will leave Bristol ct 7.40 p. M, return
ing Will leave Burlington twenty minutes
after the performances
No trips viii be guaranteed in foggy
WILLIAM E. DoRoN
Secretary, Treasurer and General Manager
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
Our Wonderful Railroads.

Gau Hamilton was right when she
said that If there were never to be
any railways on this continent it
would have been an impertinence for
Columbus to have discovered 1t. Only
by the railways could its magnificent
distances be bridged Equally correct
was Charles Carroll of Carrollton, the
last survivor of the signers of the Dec
laration Of Independence, when, on
throwing up the first shovelful of
earth for the first railway of the Unit
ed States which was intended to carry
passengers and freight, the Baltimore
and Ohio, he exclaimed, Il consider
this event second only to that of the
adoption of the Declaration of indie
pendence, II second even to that"
That was in 1928 But England was
far ahead of us in railway building In
the beginning Even Russia got bet
ter start than we did. at the outset
we imported not only our locomotives
and cars, but also the rails on which
they were run and the men to run
them. However, John Stevens, Peter
Cooper, Evan Thomas, Matthias Bald
win and others changed all this and
In their various fields laid the founda-
lions of a railway system which is to-
day In dimensions and completeness
far ahead Of that Of any. other half
dozen countries in the world combined.
-Leslie's Weekly.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19

1t is best to profit by the madness Of
sthers.- Pliny.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-01-19
CAMDEN And SUBURBAN RAILWAY co.

ar' STOPS only on signal or notice to Agent
or conductor to receive or discnarge passen-
gers. -ste
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1909-09-09
hoW,S his,

We offer One Hundred Dollars Re
ward for any case OF catarrh that can
not be cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
F, J. Cheney & Co, Toledo, o.
We. the undersigned. have known f
J. Cheaney for the last fifteen years
and believe him perfectly honorable
in all business transactions and finan
cially able to carry out any obliga.
tions made by his firm.
Walding. Klnnan & Marvin,
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, o.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken inter.
nally. acting directly upon the blood
and mucous surfaces OF the system.
Testimonials sent free. Price 75c per
bottle. Sold by all druggists.
Take Halls Family Pills for consti-
patton. d