Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-06-18

1T was a runaway match, wasn't
| it?" Yes, but he couldn't run fast
enough. She caught him"
You ought to save money for your
| family Yes, but" But whatg'.
My family won't let me. Cleveland
Leader
Poetry is the art of putting words
together in such way as to give
them their least possible commercial
Nalue-Puck
Martha-Dont you think a cookery
book is fascinating reading? Maud
Yes, indeed 1t contains so many stir
ring incidents.
She-How was your speech at the
club received the other night? He
When l sat down they said II was the
best thing | ever did
Ashley-Do you have much variety
In your boarding house? seymour
Well. we have three different names
for the meals.-London World,
Nobody realizes the immensely of
space Except the man who has to
fill daily half column with alleged
humor, - Louisville Cot rier-Journal
Tell me frankly, sii what do you
think Of my daughter voice?" Well.
madam, l think she my have q bril-
liant future in water color painting"
Figaro.
Poll Clerk-Mary Gladys harley
votes ballot number two hundred and
-. NJ. G. J.--Oh, wait moment.
please! Give me that back! want
to add postscript, Puck,
You shouldn't treat your boy So
harshy; you'll break his spirit
Well, he'll probably get married some
time, and he might as well have IL
broken Stray Stories.
Eyes. said the young wife. proudly.
father always gives something expen-
sive when he makes presents" SO
discovered when he gave you away
rejoined the young husband-Chicago
Daily News,
Irate Diner (to waiter who persist
emily hovers about the table) What
on earth are you waiting for, man? K
don't want you. Waiter-Excuse me-
sir but / am responsible for the sill
ver.-Tit.Blts.
Biggs, 11-Why are the tugs on the
Wisconsin river like the goods who
walk up and down State street,
Mugs, '12-And the answer is? Biggs~
'11-Some toe out, and some toe in
Wisconsin Sphinx.
What is your principal object, any
how" asked the visiting foreigner. ''im
building that Panama canal?" Well"
answered the native I'VE have an idea
IL will limit the size OF future battle
ships. Chicago Tribune.
Foreign travel is very improving
said the studious girl. Yes" am
swered Miss Cayenne; although yen
can't always tell where a person has
been by the pictures on the post cards
he sends home. Washington Star.
Tommy went fishing the other day
without his mothers permission. The
next morning one of his ehums INCA
him and asked. Did you catch any
thing yesterday. Tommy mot tia
/ got home" was the rather sad re
spouse.
What" exclaimed Mrs Flatlaigb-
"You don't mean TO tell me you pay n
girl $40 week for cooklng?" OH
/ no." replied Mrs Urbanville. We
only pay her So a week for cooking
The other So is for staying. Chicago
Daily News.
Professor of Sociology - II this
alarming increase in the divorce rate
continues. twenty years from now thB
institution of the home win no longer
exist In America Practical Student
How is that. professor? They all
marry again. don't they?-Puck.
"A high fnancier should be some
thing of an economist, should he noty''
! II don't think So" answered Mr. Dus-
tin stax. The object Of the econ
omlst Is to see what he can get along
with; that of the high financier is tO
see what he can get away with"
| Washington Star.
A boy once inquired why leaves of
tables were so called. since they did
not resemble leaves in the least Not
having received a satisfactory answer.
he thought for some time and then
said: II think know now; they're
called leaves because you can leave
I them up or leave them down"
BE sure and keep inside the libeF
laws said the city editor to the cub
reporter The cubs first obituary no
tice read as follows: The alleged
corpse of Mr. John Smith, asserted by
friends 10 have lived at No 1l3 West
Jones street, was said 70 have been
buried at Greenhill Cemetery yester-
day Cleveland Leader
Look at me-" exclaimed the stout.
fiorid man. Never a days sickness
in my lifel And all due to simple
food why, gents from the time Y
was twenty to when / reached forty