The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1909-02-09
Id GIT RIO Or rsou1Ia
8
Ecaeo ri Doctor WHO Ordered III pIes
sof:o ysterfs Shells For siyp6c iondfiar.

ECafo Of 6octpeA no. oEnered c1tplet
afo Oyster Shells Forls ypoehondt lar.
81 comforta bly located 5tn: easy chaira
~ ths iittle aleoYs room back q The y,
professors cigar mart. i've q; the reg
ular; patrons were ssmok king their 70.
voriteS brand and enjoying as soeinble
chat. Three OF! these gentlemen were
physicians, and they talked shop
almost altogether. VI 3.li h; 55 u.
1T Is always becoming on the part
Of members Of our profession, z said
one Of the doctors. ito be i tolerant
and to patiently listen to recital Of
the; troubles OF any one we are called
upon to attend. but ! cannot help
thinking that In many cases where q
physician has been hard at work for
a long number Of hours. and then hap
pened to be summoned to Immediately
attend some one with only some tra-
ing ailment to worry him.. and then
have to, listen to long tale Of trou-
BILE apart from his patients illness, "a
a good excuse for any one to become
rather irritable. And this reminds me
OF a little story apropos 70 what am
referring TO.
There was a certain DOCTOR" be
said. whose name will not mention,
though possibly some OF you have
heard Of him. whose services were al
ways In great demand, and frequently
when he was in dire straits for a little
rest he was summoned TO attend pa
tient who was not really in actual
need Of medical attention. II
ION one occasion when the doctor
had been fully l6 hours In attendance
upon a serious case and was about to
take a much-needed vacation Of two
or three hours. he was called to visit
a lady whose family he had been at
tending for several years. He found
the lady lanquidly taking her ease In
a rocking chair In her sitting room
and showing no signs Of illness what
ever. In fact. she contemplated attend
Ing the theater that very evening, but
he was put to the torture Of being
forced to listen to prosy account OF
the lady's imaginative troubles. and
so tlresoma and unimportant were the
details that the doctor became very
much Irrltated. At last he made his
escape and was Just about leaving
the house when he was called back.
and. like a good doctor. he obeyed,
when the lady said: oh. doctor. |
wanted to ask you II. when I return
from the theater. I might venture to
eat few oysters n
Then the physician became really
angry. Yes. madam he said, and It
will crafty me very much II YOU will
also eat the shells along with Them
THE trouble with that lady," said
the man who told the story, was that
she was a hypochondriac, and the
world Is full of lust such unfortunate
people today"
Then, q lawyer who was In the little
coterle had his inning. He. told story
OF well-known ex-Judge in one Of
the Southern States. who. when he
was practicing at the bar, could, by
pointing his long. cadaveuus-looking
|. finger at a witness. make him forget
his name and age and everything else.
I'm one case In the Court OF the
county where I studied law said the
counselor. "the Judge had a witness
In hand In a murder case, and was try
ing to convince the iurv that he had
in his evidence overstepped the truth,
and during his argument that long
finger was often and relentlessly shak-
en- at the witness.
Among the iurymen there was one
tall. lank backwoodsmen named Bill
Long. Long was afflicted In some de-
gree with strabismus. He had a most
decided squirt. In the midst OF the
lawyers argument Long arose in his
seat and disturbed the equilibrium OF
the Court. - 4
"'See here, you lawyer man. he said,
I want you to. stop abusing me. !
wont stand It any more: I'll break up
this whole derned Court II you do; |
didn't come here to be abused
1.-THE lawyer. with the greatest cour.
tesy assured the juror that his allu-
sions were Intended onlv for the wit
ness. and not intended to apply to any
Of the Jurors. i&f; .g53
"'Well. then. said Long, lust quit
a printing that long finger Of yours at
me when you are talking that way
I'm sure" said the man who re-
called the party with the legal yarn,
that q long index digit often plays
an active part In cases before the
Courts in all communities =
1t was then time for the professor
!! to close up his shop for the night. OF
there might have been more interest.
Ing Incidents Observation-Disclosures
Post. .-.l 4 y
They Tried Another Kind.
It was Sunday, evening and there
Wns n lot OF company. VISA