Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-05-07

that was only trial kiss. Life.
What did she get first when she
inherited her billionp' "Furs and
chauheurs. The Bellman.
Hoax-Here comes Borieigh. Do
you know him to speak TOT Joax--
Not If see him Philadelphia
Record.
II am looking for fashionable
overcoat.' IAN right, sir, will you
have it too short or too longY'-Flie-
gende Blaetter.
Mrs. Hicks-My husband has been
just lovely to me all day. Mrs. Wicks
Him! What was it You caught him
doing Boston Transcript
She Cat the piano)-I presume you
are true lover of music, are you
not2 He-Yes am; but pray don't
stop playing on my account.--Judge.
Hawkins-So you sent for a doctor2
Does he think you win be out soon2
Robbins imagine SO. He said he
wished l had sent for him sooner.
Puck.
Little GirI-What's an intelligence
office. mammal Mother-It's a place
where one goes to find out what
wages cooks are charging.-Nsw York
Herald.
She-Fred, do you believe that the
pen is mlghtier than the sword? He
Well, you never saw anybody sign a
check with sword, did you7-IIlus-
trated Bits.
Husband tgetting ready for the the
ater) My dear, what In the world
are you taking that newspaper along
for? Wife (coldly)-ro read between
acts.--Life.
Mrs. Youngwlfe-What Ii the first
question you ask of maid whom you
think of employing? Mrs, OldoneI
always say first, Have yon ever lived
with me beforeT--Life.
Uncle Jack, mother says you're I'll,
SO ! thought I'd like TO come and talk
to you a bit" That's kind of you"
win there be a band to play the
Dead March at your funeralY'-Ally
Sloper.
Indulgent Papa Why. my dear. you
bad a party last month. How often
DO you wish to entertain your frlendsR
She--This one is not 10 entertain my
friends papa, but to snub my enemies
Life.
"For goodness sake, Harriet. why
so sad?" ",The cooks left, but that
isn't the worst of IL; she took With
her the reclpe-book for all the things
Johns mother used to Brook
Ign Life.
Fond Mother-Tommy, darling, this
is your birthday, What would you
like to do2 Tommy, Darling latter a
moments rehection)--I think | should
enjoy seeing the baby spanked -
Paris Figaro.
lie (calllng) I'm here promptly,
Miss Fannie. Sbe-~Yes, Mr.. Staylate-
He--I never like to keep people wait
ing. She (significagtly) Waiting for
you to come, you Iheau, OF COURSE
Washington Post
IF went out in n small boat" said
the teacher, "and the owner knew il
was leaking. and got drowned, what
would that beY' After few minutes
silence little boy stood up and said +.
"A holiday, sir Catholic News
MA" said a newspaper mans son,
i know why editors call themselves
we" "WhyY' SOS the man that
doesn't like the article will think there
are too many people for him TO
tackle Christian Work and Evange-
list.
Englshman--You --aw--liye In CALI
fornia, | believe? American--Yes, sir,
San Francisco is my home. English
man--Qulte 50. All, | presume you
frequently come In contact with my
friends, the Courtneys. in Arizonah--
an adjoining state, l believe7-Har-
per's Bazaar.
Citizen--W hat1l you charge me, I'm
Gle Rastus, to cart away that pile OF
stone? Uncle Rastus-About two dol
lahs, sab Citizen-Isn't that very
high? Uncle Rastus-Yes, sah. les TO
cahtin away the stone, but I got ter
hire man to hep me hahness de
mule.-Iarpers Bazaar.
81 hope you were a good little boy
while at your aunt's and didn't tell
any stories" said his mother only
the one you put me up to, ma" re-
piled her young hopeful. Why, what
do you mean, cbildT' when she ask
ed me If I'd like to have a second
piece of cake said, No, thank You;
I've had enough"
THAT IL what | call an ideal mar
riage," Hardy declared to his wife as
they were walking homeward after an
evening with some friends. Actually
believe both think absolutely alike
Yes, they certainly are charming"
assented Mrs. Hardy; but about the
THINKING Toa vo1Y nntfaa ha