davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

you have eliminated competition
said the student OF economies.
Nothing OF the sorti" rejoiued Mr..
Dustin StaX. when we effected our
latest merger you ought 30 have seen
tho competition TO get situations in our
Offices. Washington star.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12
JUST FOR run.


She was tam aud muscular lie was
small and weak Her attitude was
resolved. His was dcprccatng
How are you going Co celebrate
New Years cvc1' be asked tlmidly
"As ID is the end Of leap year. she
answered. n proposo-'
but she got NO further. lie had
disappeared
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Large Lady (givlng cabman double
fare) I'm afraid I've given you a lot
OF trouble
Cabby (pohtely) Not a bit num- 7
likes a fare wot steadies the cab
London Opinion
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

BE careful what We say. son." eau
toned the Plunkville Polonius
yes. pop"
Remember, that YOU amt prominent
enough 70 claim that you was mis-
quoted. Puck.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Parke-I don't know what I am ever
going 20 do with that boy Of mine He
U.s. careless and absolutely reckless
OF consequences, and doesn't seem TO
care for anyone
Lane-Goodi You can make a taxi
cab driver out OF him.--Life
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Augustus Thomas says that the stage
has done more for morality than the
church has. That may be his honest
opinion. but honest opinion was never
more mistaken IN its life.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Vaudeville LADY, have just re-
fused am offer OF $1,000 O. week.
Newspaper Fallguy-Gccl Why
Y LA fellow offered me $50 "a
week that I'll really gct-Clevcland
I laanor
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

To accommodate an the members
that have been selected FOR Mr.. Tafts
cabinet by others and not himself II
would be necessary 10 have an annex
built.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

you seem TO De a busy man" re-
ma Sed the chronic bore.
Yes" replied the man behind the
desk I'm so busy ! can't find time TO
meddle with things that don't concern
me. "-- Nashville American.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

IL wouldn't ask Brown 10 play SAN
"a Claus this year 90 I were you.
why not? lie ought 90 make a good
one"
mo. It's taking chances. He rocked
boat last summer"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

little Improvement there muy bo IN tho
management seom hopeless For the
sake ~ those who arc least able 90
bear The burden OF financial high ny-
Inc hy city ofnciais some knd of ro-
form is demanded By the present situ-
alton
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

The weather is SO cold that one
scarcely objects to having Goals Of fire
heaped on his head
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

senator Tillmans reply TO the presl-
dents letter TO Senator Hale shows
that the tines of his pitchfork are no
longer sharper than a serponrs tooth.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

1t ls almost as hard for a congress-
man 20 escape from bis shadower as
from his shadow.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

When Missouri has ousted an the
trusts win she sigh for other worlds to
conquer?
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

when Binks. poor fellow wanted
20 get married. he certainly had a
hard time.
WHY
Because first he had TO pop the
question aud then he had 10 quest
ton the pop
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

The city engineer has a plan to
beautlfy the city Why not make him
arbitcr elegantarium?
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

II the secretary or the navy should
ask for eight largest battlcships IN the
world. would he get four?
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Under the TAFT administration the
time honorcd saying PLAY ball" may
have to give way 10 play golf"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

The Connecticut IS not carrying
wooden nutmess to the earthquake suf-
fercrs
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Gomez ays that Venezuela win b.
good.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Back to the farm" ls a fine. al
Turing cry. But what about those who
never were on farm in their lives?
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

"spit spit spy tel noe where the
senator is or you're sure % de-"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Mr. Carnegie is ambiguous" says au
exchange Rather D. he not ubiqultousg
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

Friends Of prohibition should rcmem-
Der that perseverance conquers AN
things.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12
RECENT PUBLICATIONS.

A varied and rich table of contents
Is presented by the Homiletio Review
for January. II includes n stirring New
Years message 10 ministers by presi-
dent w. Dewitt Hyde OF Bowdoin coll
lege, followed by editorials and these
by several general articles Of unusual
merit. The Rev. Edward Ii. "Opens
pleads for the quiet, INEXPENSIVE re-
ligiOus type, Ike Nicodemus in a brill
liant article entitled Reserve and
Religion" Dwight NJ Pratt, DID, de-
scnoes the Present Tendencies IA Re
hgiOn' naming the growing passion
for reality, the new social conscious
ness, the evangelistic movement, etc.
An article liable 20 arouse sharp dis
cussion a. that by Prof George h
Dawson, ph.D.. The Failure Of the
Church to Produce Moral Character"
Prof Dawson slashcs with a strong
style. and holds the readers interest
from the start An interesting inter-
view with DIT. William r. Huntington
NJ Grace Church. New York, describing
his preaching methods ana giving n
near View of Grace church and its i'm
stituuous. Us written by Rev william
Durham. The studies in Social CHRIS
tianty" preceded by a striking article
by Josiah strong on The Industrial
Revolution furnish q great amount of
sociological Information In limo with
the best thinking OF our times Dr
Icnos continues his critical Bible stu
dies. beginning new series 10 conform
TO the lntcrrsaGional Sunday School
Lessons for 1903. The sermons are by
W. T. Watkinson, DID; Edward Nv
crctt Hale. DID. the Rev. William q.
Stiles James M Ludlow, DID,. the
Rev. %. II. Carmichael and A. j.
Haynes. DID. There are soas0nable
outlines, Illustrations in prose and verse
themes and tcxts. and reviews of now
books Prof William Adams Brown
gives iu the latter department a run
ming survey of thc important books for
1908. Funk a WaFuMls Co.. $3.50 East
23rd ST., New York.
Tho opening articles of the series.
"stur.cs of Great Nation" 10 ap-
pear lu The National Magazine FOR 1909.
have awakened interest The January
issue contains % remarkable sketch OF
'Ihe supreme Court OF the United
Sntcs.' written hy ox-Justice Henry
B. Brown. "rhe Secrets Of the Secret
Service arc told By chief John VIII
kie. who has made "a remarkable rcc-
ord Boo This department The Making
of Uncle Sam Money" "a subject
Chat interests cvory man. woman and
child in the country. and the story is
gruNlug auu printing "rhc National
Health is treated ina AN article by Sur
Soon General Walter Wymau. vivid
and picturesque A. the second of Peter
MHcQueen's illustrated articles ON
'hooseyolts African Hunting Grounds
Many 0f tho photographs were taken
ny Mr MacQuecn. who has just re-
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

The more iisht there is on the bread
question the lighter the loaves appear.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

To make war on tuberculosis it isn't
necessary first 10 catch your tubercu-
l0sis.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

A blunt person is noted for bis point
ed remarks rather than for his dun
talk.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1909-01-12

VIII the President give Senator rm-
man a return match, or message rath-
or?
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
luhers Immigration Bill.

For the better advertisement and de-
velopment of the state, Speaker Lu-
bers has introduced bill, backed by
the state commercial associations, to
create board of immigration and give
1t $4,000 to spend in the next two
years. Half of the appropriation can
be spent each year The board is to
consist of nine members named by
the governor and confirmed by the
Senate. this board to elect a commits
sioner OF immigration to carry on the
work under direction of the board. The
state is to be advertised by exhibits or
by display in newspapers and periodi-
calls, as the board sees fit.
The commissioner is expected to be
an expert in the advertising and pro
motion business. The bill also estab
fishes an advertising fund to be com
posed of public subscriptions and held
by the state treasurer to be used as
the board directs.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
DAILY RECORD OF EVENTS
TRANSFERRING AT STATE CAPITAL
State School Consolidation.

Sen. ID. NJ. Campbell has introduced
a bill to place all the state educational
institutions under one board of con-
troll. the consolidation to be called
THE University of Colorado" The
principal provisions of the bill are as
follows:
Article 1.-The University of Colo
RADIO Is hereby created and established
with its chief administrative office To-
Gated at Boulder. Colorado. in the
buildings of the present State univer-
sity, and shall be composed of the fol-
lowing institutions of learning:
"First-The College of Liberal Arts
and Scientific Departments at Boul-
der.
Second-The Agricultural College
and College of Mechanic Arts at Fort
Collins. Colorado.
"Third-The State Normal School
and Department of pedagogy at Gree
ley, Colorado.
"Fourth-The State School of Min
ing Engineering and Metallurgy at
Golden, Colorado.
"Fifth-All such professional schools
of law and medicine as the board of
regents may deem proper to establish
in the city of Denver, when. in their
judgment. such schools should be es.
tablished to serve public welfare"
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
ALL IN rwAln's IMAGINATION.
Marks Story of Petrfied Indian Good
Joke on Town.

The days when Sam Clemens
stuck type" on the Hannabal Union
are recalled by this anecdote: One
morning Sam" came into the office
very thoughtful. hung up his
coat and went to the frame. He
worked diligently for several hours
without any copy on his small-cap case
in front of him. He was setting up
the story of wonderful find he and
some of his comrades found in Nc
Douglas cave the Sunday before. The
narration was to the effect that crowd
of boys, while exploring the great cave
on Sunday afternoon, ran across a pet
rified Indian. The citizens were great
ly worked up over the story. and they
hired a scientist from Quincy to look
the dead Indian in the face and report.
The man who came to perform this
task wore gray mutton-chop whiskers,
thoughtful brow, and spectacles, of
course. He was an Unconditional chap,
and he looked learned and the commit
tee was satisfied of his ability. BY
the terms of his contract he was to
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Agricultural Board Members,

A message was received in the Sen
ate from the governor nominating John
C. Bell and Elias NJ. Ammons as mem
bers of the State Board of Agriculture.
On motion of Senator Scott the Sen
ate went into executive session for a
minute, and when the doors were re-
opened the nominations were unani-
mously confirmed. They succeed b.
U. Dye of Rocky Ford and j. l.. Chat
field of Gypsum on the board Bell,
formerly congressman from Colorado,
is a lawyer by profession, but owns a
4S0acre farm near Montrose. Ammons
is one of the leading stockmen and
farmers of the state.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
AGAINST White Slave Traffic.

SubJecting to Imprisonment in the
penitentiary for not less than one or
more than five years any person who
lives upon the earnings of fallen
woman, is the purpose of bill intro
duced by Senator Campbell. The bill
provides that any male over eighteen
years OF age who shall be servant
or employe in house of i'll fame, and
any male or female, over the age of
eighteen, who shall assist in the con-
Quoting of such house, or who shall
live on the earnings of any woman OF
bad rerute, shall be guilty of felony
and subject to Imprisonment for from
one to five years. The bill provides
the same penalty for procuring by
either man or woman. Habitual fire.
quenting of disorderly house is to be
deemed prima facie evidence of viola
tion OF the law.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Stringent Sanitation Bill.

Senator Twining has introduced, at
the request of the State Board OF
Health, the bill prepared by that board,
giving the pure food commissioner all
the power that he has found he lacked
under the operation of the existing law.
The bill proposes that the Board of
Health shall have absolute jurisdiction
over any kind of establishment or ve-
hicle in which food is handled. even to
the extent of controlling the fashion
of dress Of employees and inspecting
them as TO personal cleanliness.
Besides tubercular and consumptive
sufferers, those put under the ban are: [:
Victims OF smallpox, diphtheria, scar
let and yellow fever, bubonic plague,
leprosy, measles and mumps, whooping
cough and chicken pox, as well as other
virulent and contagious diseases.
The law applies to bakeries, Gamer
les, packing and slaughter houses,
dairies. creameries. cheese factories,
confectioneries and meat markets.
To insure against the employment of
any diseased person, the State Board of
Health is authorized to conduct fire.
quent investigations and order
changes.
Easements or cellars must be paved
with scme nonabsorbent flooring and
flushed with water daily. All utensils
used III the manufacture and prepara-
tion of food must be washed daily.
Toilet rooms must be separated from
places where food is manufactured
and prepared. Personal cleanliness
must be observed by employees. Any
food stuffs which suffer from dust or
exposure to the air. must be kept in
closed receptacles. Screens must be
provided during seasons of the year
when flies are busy.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Western Federation Claims.

Bills have been presented in the
House to pledge the state to pay for
damages to Western Federation prop
erty during the troubles in the Cripple
Creek district during the time the mine
owners were driving the federation
from that camp. Two more of these
bills are to come, asking total appro-
priation running well towards 100000.
One of these presented Monday in
cludes claim for $19,600 for damages
to the store of the miners at Victor,
another for $500 for damages to the
store at Anaconda, and the third for
over $4,000 for damages to and rent OF
the hall at Victor during its occupation
by the military.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
THE woNpERsERRY.

Mr.. Luther Burbank, the plant Wiz
ard of California, has originated
wonderful new plant which grows any
where, in any soil or climate, and bears
great quantities of luscious berries all
the season. Plants are grown from
seed, and it takes only three months
to get them in bearing, and they may
be grown and fruited all summer in
the garden. or in pots during the win
ter. 1t is unquestionably the greatest
Fruit Novelty ever known, and Mr..
Burbank has made Mr.. John Lewis
Childs, of Floral Park. n. Y, the in
troducer He says that Mr.. Childs is
one of the largest, best-known. fair
est and most reliable Scotsman in
America. Mr.. Childs is advertising
seed of the Wonderberry all over the
world. and offering great inducements
to Agents for taking orders for it.
This berry is so fine and valuable. and
so easily grown anywhere, that every
body should get 1t at once.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Public Service Bill,

Sen. lully SCOTS pubic service
commission bill is drafted upon the
bill which Governor Hughes so effec-
lively put through the New York Leg
islaturs.
1t also contains the new additions to
be made this year by Governor Hughes,
regulating telephone. telegraph. gas,
electric and water corporations, modi-
fled to serve local conditions.
The railroad commission is made
will serve until their terms expire.
Each member will serve six years and
will be appointed by the governor.
The commission will appoint pub
lie service commission. who shall re-
ceive a salary of $4,000 year and
counsel at $4,000 year. The counsel
shall appoint an assistant at salary
of $500 year In addition the COM
mission shall appoint clerks. assist
ants and inspectors.
No person can serve on the board or
in its employ who is connected in any
way with a corporation which comes
under the provisions of the act, and no
one connected with the commission
shall acquire any corporation interest
or stock while serving.
The railroad law is largely included
in the bill. The general law applicable
to all corporations coming under the
provision, including railroads, street
railways, common carriers, gas, cleo
trio, water, telegraph and telephone
companies. is that the commission
shall regulate all rates and schedules,
order change of them. and of property
as it thinks best for the public safety
or good. 1t may order a railroad to
move its station. or terminal. build
switches or remove them. replace
track or equipment, and may order
change of equipment and plants Of the
other corporations. The books of all
shall b. open to inspection. regular re-
ports must be made. testimony in
cases of investigation of accidents
must be given, and no corporation
shall be excused on the ground that 1t
would incriminate itself. But such evil
dence shall not be used against per
sons or corporations in damage suits.
All transfers of stocks and bonds
must Iaeet the approval of the board
gal. ur.ess purely a transfer for col
| lateral security. Franchises not util-
lied by the holder, or parts of them
not used, may be demanded by the
state through the courts. A shipper
may demand a sidetrack or switch
and get it if his business justifies.
Municipal water gas or electric plants
must make regular reports and are
subject to investigation. The commits
sion will fix the standard of quality
of gas and water, the purity and pres
sure of gas. current and lamps used
by electric companies. Variations from
these standerds will cause the service
to be suspended. Provisions are made
by which consumers of these utilities
or patrons of the telephone and tele-
graph can secure an investigation upon
petition
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
To REGULATE Dance Halls.

Representative Foley has introduced
in the house bill to regulate dance
halls, winerooms and similar places,
for the protection of young girls. The
bill provides that no girl under the age
of eighteca years shall be permitted
to enter a dance hall or wineroom un-
less accompanied by either her father
or her mother. Proprietors found
guilty of violating the provisions of
the law shall be punished by a fine
OF from $50 to $500 or a Jail sentence
not to exceed six months or both. Con
viction establishes proof of conducting
a disorderly house and is made the
ground for revocation of the license.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
One Hundred Years Aoo,

1t has been some time announced
that the new machine for travelling
without horses, being impelled entire
1y by steam, was matched TO run "a
hours against any horse in the king.
dom. This bet, so novel in the sport
ing world will be decided on Wednes-
day and Thursday next. The machine
is to start at two o'clock on Wednes.
day on its ground in the fields near
Russell square to demonstrate the ex-
tent of its speed and endurance. Very
large sums are depending on the issue
From the London Observer.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Bill Fund Defective.

Owing to fatal defect in the bill
for bank guarantee law, that meas
ure will have to be re-introduced into
the House, or an agreement will be
made to push the Senate bill on the
same subject. The bill was given to
the introducer by an attorney. who
had carefully studied all its provis
ions, but who had neglected to put in
the most important part-that line
containing the enacting clause. The
discovery was not made until after L.
900 copies of the bill had been printed.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Proposed New County.

Grant county is to be a candidate
lor recognition by the Legislature. Its
citizens have appealed for place on
the state map. They wish to make
Ordway a coSnty seat, and declare that
the county benefited is really an in
dependent kingdom of farmers who do
not wish to cross river to attend to
their business in the county seat. "A
strong lobby has already arrived in
Denver to argue with members on the
advisabillty of making the county.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29

write complete report. detailing
every possible feature of the discovery
for historical preservation. The in
vestigator returned at nightfall, COW
cred with clay, with clothing torn and
skin barked in countless places by
falls of rocks. He sought out the
chairman of the committee that en-
ployed him and silently delivered to
him this statement: Mileage in look
ing for dead Indian, $40; reading
story about dead Indian. So; bruised
shins on the way to dead Indian, $40.
Report: There was no dead Indian
Macon (Mo.) Republican
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Board of Control.

Senator Scott has introduced bill
placing all penal. charitable and re-
formatory institutions of the state un-
der one board of control, consisting
of three members, only two of whom
shall be members of one political par
$4,000 annually, according to Sena-
tor Scott. 1t is modelled after the Min
nesota bill. The board will be given
the power TO introduce reforms by the
terms of the bill.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Proposed Bounty Bill.

The Boulder Fish and Game Club is
having bill prepared to be introduced
in the Legislature providing for boun-
ty on lions, wolves, coyotes, foxes, bob
cats, lynx and all game destroying an
imals. Later bill will be introduced
providing that it shall be unlawful to
kill either does or fawns for ten years,
and permitting the killing of bucks for
only fifteen days each year. The club
is cooperating with similar organiza-
tions throughout the state and the
members are hopeful that both bills
VIII become laws.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Snow Slide Kills -Four.

Denver-A Republican special from
Ouray Friday night says: Pouring
down in sinuous course for nearly two
miles from the mountain top, like a
veritable Niagara, the ''waterhole"
slide, Just north of the Camp Bird mill,
on the Sneffles road, eight miles from
Ouray this afternoon. carried Doctor
Douthhitt, George Knerr, Peter Sy-
mott and John Wittwer to their death.
Three are buried under fifty feet of
snow in the canon. The body of Sy.
mott, teamster, wes recovered.
The Springfield herald., 1909-01-29
Ranqe War Arrests.

Belle Fourche, s. D.-From confes-
sions said to have been secured from
the leaders, following the arrest of nine
prominent stockmen of Crook county,
Wyoming, sensational revelations are
expected. The men under arrest are
IFaac, Andrew and Samuel Mexican. d.
w. Mosbarger, George Martin, Stanley
Baugh, j. c. Mulholland, Terry Zim-
merscheid and A. o. Squiers. They are
charged with being members of a Sc
cret band of stockmen organized to
drive out a sheep company.