Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-04-02
The Poor Relation

Il used TO wonder. SAID the poor
relation, why our Aunt Maria or
our Uncle Bill didn't give us a little
OF theic money. Now there's two
families, relations Of ours, both got
let Of money, more'n they know
what to do with, as the saying Is,
but they never gave us a cent. and
we had SO many uses for It.
They had horses and carriages
they've both got an automobile now
too-and they both had fine houses
and they lived In good style. and we
had to plug from week to week for
what we did have. with never any
margin for Injuries or even for some
OF the comforts, and they knew
these things, or they must have
known them, and they might have
given us something without ever
missing It, but they never gave us
anything.
They'd ask us to dinner some
times and when we went they used
to treat US Just as nice as could be,
and sometimes they came to see us,
but never any money, and they had
so much. After a while ! began to
get a little light on this.
For one thing. people that have
got money are pretty apt to hang
on to It, but after a while-and this
! found to be true also Of many other
people supposed to be equally well
nxed-after;. while / began to dis
cover that relatively speaking, that
is considering the way they lived.
Aunt Maria and Uncle Bill didn't
have much more spare money than
W did They certainly did have o
lot more than we did, lot more, but
they had just the same ambitions
and aspirations and heartburnings
and that sort Of thing that we did
and a. cost them a heap more to keep
up with the procession that they
were In than 1t did us to keep up
with the procession that we we're in
For instance. to get right down
to simple facts-there's Julia-that's
my wife, you understandable does
not have half the clothes she'd like
to have; she doesn't begin to have
the dresses that the wife of a friend
Of ours does who earns more money
than do, and so naturally she would
like to have a few more dresses to
keep up as good as anybody with the
people we know.
But. do you know, / think our
rich Aunt Maria has Just the same
trouble for herself and her daugh-
ters to keep up with the people that
they know? Yes, sir. I'll bet you
they have Just the same troubles
along this line that we do.
They've got lots OF money, bit
they know people that have got M re
money than they have, just as we
know people that have got more
money than we have, and I'll bel
they worry more over that than we
do. You know we all have our trou-
bles; we're all trying to keep up
with somebody, and I'll bet that
Aunt Maria and her girls worry more
over their clothes than Julia does
over hers.
Julia likes jewelry and mighty
little Of 1t she's got-I haven't said
anything to her about 1t. but I'm
going to get her a nice little diamond
ring for Christmas. But mighty lit
tie jewelry has Julia got. and Aunt
Maria and her girls have got lots.
Why, Aunt Maria has got a pearl
necklace. But don't you suppose
that she knows women that have
got much Amer pearls, such as shed
give anything to have but that she
can't afford7 And don't you suppose
that her girls feel Just the same
when they meet girls that have got
finer things than they have?
Why, it's as sure as anything
you know The poor relations don't
have a monopoly Of all the heart
burnings by a long shot. We all have
our troubles.
Take Uncle Bill, with a barrel OF
money and an extravagant family
Do you know / think there must be
2 times when his checkbook must be
about as lean for him as mine is for
me-tiInes when l think he must
come about as near to being strap
ped for ready money as / am?
think SO. And Uncle Bill is consid-
cradle Of = hummer too.
Anyhow. / no longer wonder OF
worry over why they don't give US
something, I've stopped being a poor
relation. I've got health and
strength and l sleep well nights and
I'm going to strike out on my own
account and get rich myself.
And what am going to do about
ray poor. relations then7 Nm
Well, we'll see about that when we
get the money. New York Sun.