The sea coast echo. [volume] (Bay Saint Louis, Miss.) 1892-current, 1909-12-04

OAoNi
"Cook has confessed!" was his halloo
The next township he galloped through /;
But these were also knowing swains,
And yelled, "Go tell it to the Danes!"
At which rebuff he frowned frown
And said: "I'll try just one more town, >
And, on the solemn truth resolved,
Cried, "Standard Oil has been dissolved
But this town said, and shook it noggin
"Kcep right on, Paul, to Copenhagen
December was anciently the tenth
month, and it's name is from the Latin
decem (ten). 1t has always been the
last month in every calendar. Like our =
selves, the ancients were not quite sure
whether they could afford it or not, and
it was therefore always placed where it
could be dropped with the least disturb
ance of the calendar year. Alexander
the Great always attacked his enemies
Immediately after Christmas, when they
didn't have a cent, and julius Caesar,
who could see farther than Jim Hill, re-
peatedly warned Rome against the Goths
and Vandals, who like the trusts, gave
each other 70 Christmas presents.
The cast for the annual Christmas
cantata will be as follows: Santa Claus,
Mr.. Taft. Sled, Mr.. Carnegie. Rein
deer, Mr.. Kuhn, Mr.. Loeb, Mr.. Aldrich
and Mr.. Payne. Bells, Mrs. Green and
Mrs. Sage. Whip, Mr.. Lawson. Snow,
Chancellor Day. Moon, Mr.. Archbold,
Roof, Mr.. Ryan. Chimney, Mr.. Hill.
Pack, Mr.. Sherman. Tree, Mr.. Rookie
rell. sleeping child, Mr.. Morgan. The
performance will be given on the night
of the Oath. Mr.. Morgan is said to be
in the awakening scene the most de-
lightful child in the history of the play
The natural phenomena of the month
will be encouraging. On the 18th there
! will be a partial eclipse of the sun visi-
BILE in the region around the South Pole.
During the eclipse 16 ounces of sugar
will weigh pound at the New York
custom house and gas meters will run
backwards. On the 21st the Coal Trust
will kick the sun across the Tropic of
Capricorn for a field goal, and the win
| ter solstice will begin with the ball in
| the possession Of the trusts on our five
yard line. This will be the shortest day
of the year, ann Mr.. Peary will be the
favorite in the North Pole dispute.
The dawn of winter will disclose
John Rockefeller with his toes
Wigwagging with an upward thrust,
And pieces of the Sugar Trust
Disseminated here and there,
While Uncle Samuel with his hair
Awry in angry little puffs
Is looking for bis coat and cuffs.
The breath of Boreas will blow, and
10, the soft and flakey snow will lay its
mantle on the hill and look for cubby
holes to fill. The furry colt will feel
the fine on-come Of Winter down his
spine, the which will make him buck
and squeal and snap the cracker on his
keel. The chilly dog will sniff the air
and don his suit Of heavy hair, and in
his igloo made Of snow the blubber-eat-
ing Eskimo will twinge with rheumatic
and gout and wonder how the fight came
out. The lusty calf viii bawl and bah
and burtow in the stack Of straw, and
Winter with its biting wind, will urge
him inward from behind. The rabbit
hunter, red of face, will prosecute the
thrilling chase, and the flying rabbit,
frightened daft, will run like Roosevelt
were aft.
The cost of living, plump and stout, 2
Will dare the Christmas shopper out,
And chase him headlong through the
door
And here and there around the store;
/, And every time he shall espy
A present he would like to buy
The swift pursuer, fell and grim
Will knock his pins from under him
And slap him smartly on the gills
With seven pounds of household bills.
| At which the drums will sadly beat
and all the dollies fair and sweet will
| weep in concert, and the toys will make
la thunder of noise. The melancholy
horns viii toot, and the little soldier in
his suit viii wave his trusty hayersack
| ~,,5 -, !, A., fl,a ho olr
We must have Christmas in these parts,
no matter who it is that smarts or what
/ the blooming tariff is, or any man de-
sires for his. We've got to I'LL those
empty socks, no matter ii the planet
rocks, or if the plutocrats we rile go
round barefooted for while. We don't
mind being made the goat and wearing
onr old ovnrcnat wear in and wear ont