The Sauk Centre herald., 1909-08-19

L
wife which letter in the magic name
1t was the "Y'" He LETT the house
five minutes earlier than usual and
stopped in at the corner grocery on
his way to the train. When he
emerged it was with decidedly
guilty air. Under his arm was a
small square package wrapped in
brown paper.
| At the office the Man opened his
parcel surreptitiously and drew forth
carton of Predigested Oats. He slit
the top with a penknife and groped in
| the interior until his fingers encoun-
tered a small square of rasteboard.
With far greater agitation than moves
the professional stock-gambler who
| notes on the ticker the gain or loss
of thousands, he examined the little
card. 1t bore the imprint of an "M."
Somehow the Man could not fix his
mind on his business. A little leaven
had leavened his whole lump.
Queer things transpired at the Of
flee within the next week or so. Each
morning the Man appeared with two
or three packages under his arm, and
yet he never took any bundles away
with him. The boy was sent so often
to various downtown groceries for
Predigested Oats that he confided to
the janitor his fear that the boss was
turning into a horse. The janitress
querulously complained that a poor
woman's life wasn't worth living, the
way No. 242 Uttered up his carpet day
after day with that brownish powdery
stuff that was so hard to sweep out
The Man himself began to get
cramped for room. His desk was full
OF oats His coat and overcoat had to
be laid over the back of chair dur
ing the day-the clothes-lockers
were crowded with square boxes. The
stationery closet was bulging with
predigestion.
There comes point when the addi-
tion of one little straw to the cameps
burden brings that faithful animal to
an untimely end. In desperation the
Man one day bought dozen packages
of the detested oats at one fell swoop,
and found within them a dozen dupli-
Gates of letters he already had, but
no "Y.''
This game is an Internal swindle,"
he cried, hurting shower of oats and
cartons through the open window
into the light-shaft. "By the Great
Horn Spoon, don't believe there ever
was a " in any of their boxes! It's
robbery, but they tried their game on
the wrong man when they tackled
me. I'll see whether there's any law
in this land!"
Determined to strike while the iron
was hot, the Man telephoned to his
attorney, who roasted several stories
higher in the same skyscraper, ask
ing him to stop in on his way to
lunch. Within an hour the lawyer
appeared, and listened attentively to
the Mans recital of how his wife had
invested vast sums on the represen-
tations of the cereal manufacturers,
and of how much evidence she had
acquired by purchase of the absence
of an essential letter from the pack
ages. In thus setting forth the case
IL
necessary to mention his own pur-
chases. For the sake of convenience
he simply added his expenditure to
hers and represented the sum total as
her outlay.
'"Now, tell me, Galloway" he con-
cluded, "is there no way of getting
back at these people? Couldn't we
get at them through the postal laws,
if by no other procedure? Are they
to go on robbing the public indefi-
nitely?"
WELL said the lawyer, pressing
his finger-tips together refiectively, Il
could tell better if l were acquainted
with the exact terms of the companys
offer. l suppose they are printed on
the package. Couldn't you bring down
a carton tomorrow"
Certainly. Come to think of it,
believe I have one of their old boxes
down here somewhere. Let me see
where did l put it? You're taller than
l am-just look on top of that book
case, won't your
AS Galloway turned his back to
grope for the carton on the book
case, his client hastily slid open
drawer of his desk, grabbed the top
most package, and pushed the drawer
home.
"Oh, here it is; had it in my DESK
he said, passing it to the attorney.
The latter read the printed PROPOSE
ton carefully and glanced over the
top of his spectacles at the would-be
litigant
What did you say was the missing
letter." he asked.
1T is ~"
"'Y?' Where does " come in?"
I'm Prettyman's, Of course. P-r-e-t-
t-Y-m-a-n-s."
The lawyer looked at him SUSPECT
ously. You're not trying to Josh
me, are your he asked. :.
Plainly the Man was puzzled.
"See here" said the lawyer; with
| out prejudice to your general intelli-
gence, it seems to me that in this par
ticular instance you've been making
| a monkey of yourself. Here is Pretti-
mans spelt in letters an inch high on
the carton-P-r-e-t-t-I-m-