Los Angeles herald., 1909-01-06
ROUNDHEADS

n great interest was the dispatch
published in Los Angeles Herald
~ in which the statement was made
that haircuts helped Christianity to
maintain a comfortable foothold in
Japan, where, previous to the Japanese
Russian war, it had been hardly toll
Grated. The influence of the haircut
on civilization long before the days of
Christianity is evident to all students
Of history, while after Christianity was
adopted by our ancestors they cut their
hair and licked all creation. In an
early period of the worlds history the
longhairs had everything their own
way. Their champion, a husky warrior
named Samson, wore flowing locks and
was g. terror to the distinguished ances-
tors of the seafaring race that now
uses the English or American language.
Our forefathers, the Philistines, were
shorthairs. and they thought the secret
Of Samson's strength was in his long
locks, SO they gave him a fatal haircut.
At q; much later date the hill tribes
who floated down the Tiber in their
cowskin canoes and founded Rome
kept their hair cut short. In campaign
after campaign they vanquished the
longhairs, until the Roman empire
sprawled over most of Europe. The
shorthaired Roman Christians forced
the conquered provinces to adopt their
religion and compelled the inhabitants
to cut their hair short and shave their
faces. Those who refused to obey the
anti-hirsute ordinance were called con-
temptuously 'barbarians,," which in
plain English means hairy mugs"
Still later in history two contending
factions strove for the mastery of
southern Britain. Those who cut their
hair and shaved their faces were nick
named, in derision, "Roundheads," but
the hairless gentlemen had the better
of the argument in the long run, and
the people who use the language of
Oliver Cromwell still wear their hair in
the CrOmwellian style. In spite Of an
eighteenth century attempt to revive
long hair, it never came into popular
favor again, because keen observers
saw that in disputes, controversies,
duels or pitched battles the shorthaired
man always did up his adversary.
For such a long time has the worlds
predominant race or blend of races
worn short hair that people now think
long hair looks odd, and have COM
pletely lost sight of the disproportionate
relation Of the ears to the rest of the
human headscape; and it doesn't
wound our feelings in the least to recol-
lect that when a Cavalier for the first
time clapped eyes on a Roundhestd he
nearly tumbled out Of his saddle a.
laughing at the vision Of ears with
head between them which met his I'M
accustomed eyes. Soon the Cavalier
longhairs were fetching and carrying
for the Puritan shorthairs; and from
that time to this, no matter what may
have been the feeting fashion among
civilians, the soldiers and sailors of
the English-speaking peoples have been
compelled to crop their hair short and
go roundhead. Our ancestors very
naturally associated short hair with
victory-and history as we'll as ex-
perience justified the association.
Now we are told the japanese kept
their hair cut short while they were
fighting the Russians and have found
out the secret handed down from the
roundhead Romans to the roundhead
Britons, and from them to the round
head Americans-that the victor in the
great struggles of the world is the
"ShOrf hair" Ever since thew 1ear0ad
to cut their hair in the fashion pre-
scribed by julius Caesar and Oliver
Cromwell the Japs have been forml-
dable warriors and have made rapid
progress in the arts Of peace.