davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22
Bryan apA the Presidency

The Missouri Sharp Shooter SAYS:
cater all. MIR. Bryan is the only
Democrat that disturbes Republican
dreams and causes loss of sleep"
That is very true. In fact, it is
tplly as true ~ NOS. Oh The sla,cMen S
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Delay in commencing treatment, for a
slight irregulari,y that could have been
cured quickly by Foley's Kidney Rene.
dy may result. i'll a serious kidney dis.
ca e. I'oley's Kidney Remedy builds
up the worn out tissues aud slrenSthen2
these organs.
Sold by all druggists.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Pinesalye, carboliaed, thoroughly heal.
ing and cleansing, a%ntisert,c, soo,hes
and stops pain quickly. rinesalve is
tile best household remedy known for
bruises, burns, cuts, scratches, Sores, etc.
Sold by Globe Drugstore.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Many people with chronic throat and
lang trouble haye comfort and relief in
l'oiey's Honey and Tar as it cures stub
horn coughs after other treatment has
failed. /" n. Ruggles, Reasnor. Iowa,
writes: The doctors said l had COIL
sumption, and I got no better until !
took Eoley's Honey and Tar. 1t stopped
the hemorrhages and pain in my lungs
and they are 10Y as sound as a-bullet."
Sold by all Druggists.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22
Advertising Rates.

Display advertising by the year, to average
four inches o. more. SIC. per inch each issue.
rrofcssiora, cards. one inch, 81 cents per
month two irc'ic. s cents pet month,
Jocals-fve lines, or over. S cents per line Tor
b,,, insertion: - T. per line FIR each subsequent
in,cttion. IN HtCs type 10 ceut- per line tor
Rt-t insertion. 5 c,Ets pet line for each sibse-
qrsnt insertion
legal advertising At legal rates.
special rates on page. advertisements
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Summer coughs and colds are obstin
ate and difficult 70 cure. The most
prompt method is 70 taxa, something
plea, ant which. viii gently move the
bowels; a good laxative cough syrup.
Bees Laxative Cough syrup will surely
and promptly cure your cold.
::'vr Sale by Globe Drugst2re.-
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Rings Little Liver Pills regulate tin
bowels and cures sick headache.
Sold by Globe Drug Store.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

attended by the highest priced baby
specialist could not be cured Of stomac,,
or bowel trouble any quicker or surer
than your baby if you give i, NJ Gee $
Baby Elixir. Cures diarrlioca, dysen.cry
and all arrangements OF the stomach or
bowels. Price % cents and 30 cents.
Sold by Globe Drug Store.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

When a town woman spends a few
days in the country she refers to it ever
after as a house party.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Many a, man imagines he knows all
about the ~s,,ancisl. question because he
once had OCCASION 70 cash a 81 check.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Learning from the experience OF Others
is like getting money in a letter.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

When a drunken man doesn't think he
is exceptionally wise the chances are he
is beyond the thinking stage.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Some women's only interest in life is
to dress to kill.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

The woman who builds castles in tn
air doesn't have to worry about house
cleaning.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

An old crouch is as god as I new one
if on are merely looking for trouble.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Pineules for the kidneys are "a natural
aid. They readily dissolve and are
quickly assimulated. They will give
prompt relief from back ache, weak
back, bladder inflammation and urinary
disorders.
Sold nv Clole Dvuuctora
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

An Idle rumor is about as busy as Il
pesky house fly.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22
Mere Wishing Won't Bring Sue.
cess.

To make a SUCCESS in a cure Of. Kidney,
Bladder or Rheumatic trouble take, one
bottle Ct HALLS, TEXAS WONDER.
1t gives quick aad permanent relief.
Write for testimonials, +. w. Eall, 2y2s,
Olive ST., 81. Louis. Mo.
Sold by druggist,
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

REV. A. p. Foster preached a
very effective sermon to a large and
attentive audience Sunday night, his
subject being, "Thc God and the
Bible OF Nersaillcs.' He made the
startling statement that out Of the en-
tire white population of Versailles,
1850, not to exceed 400 attend
church. and this he thought 4 large
estimate. and OF ours not all Of the
400 are regular attendants. The 5.
). have an attendance q! about 270.
leaving about 1880 who never attend
Sunday school. Truly, as Bro.
Foster had been told before his COM
ing here, he has found Versailles and
the surrounding country y of the
greatest missionary fields in Missouri.
We do not call in question any of
Bro. Fosters estimates, but have not
fully recovered from our surprise, for
nearly all the Nersaillians of our &C
luaint,nce are church members, and
we were guessing that the large
majority OF our population was chris
tian. Can it be that many of the
church members and their families, do
not attend church or Sunday school ?
Versailles cannot be considered a
wicked city, as u court records
show, it is more of omission than
commission, but a passive religion is
of poor quality and small value.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Music evidently has charms for those
sayases next door who pound the piano
seventeen hourssa day.
The first application of ManZan, the
great Pile remedy, will almost instantly
give relief. Continued use Of Manzan
for a few days will effect a cure. The
tube in which it is put up has a small
nozzle attached, SO that there is no III.
convenience whatever. ManZan is for
the cure Of any kind Of piles. 1t is
sold by Globe Drugstore.
And a man can see beauty in the home.
liest woman who makes him believe that
she considers him smart.
Foley's Honey and Tar not only stops
chronic coughs that weaken the consti.
tuition and develop into consumption,
but heals and strengthens the lungs. 1t
affords comfort and relief in the worst
cases of chronic bronchitis, asthma, hay
fever and lung trouble.
Sold by all druggists.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22
The Home Paper.

The local newspaper should be
found in every home. No child will
grow up ignorant who can be taught
70 APPRECIATE the home paper. 1t is
the stepping stone of intelligence in
all of those matters not to be learned
in books. Give your children a
foreign paper which contains not on-
word about any person, place or
thing which they ever saw, or perhaps
evcr heard of, and how can you ex-
pcct them to be Interested? But let
them have the home paper and read
of persons whom they meet, and
places with which they are familiar,
and soon an interest is awakened
which increases with every arrival Of
the local paper. Thus a habit of
reading is formed, and those children
will read the papers all their lives and
become intelligent men and women,
a credit to their ancestors and strong
in their knowledge OF the world as it
is to-day.--Summericld (O.) News.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Think what you please-but keep most
of your thoughts to yourself.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

The toper's peck of trouble is always
full and stopping over.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Why is it tha, a fat woman seldom has
a disagreeable temper?
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Pineules-new Kidney r~emedy-are for
all diseases of the kidneys aud bladder.
They act promptly in all cases of lame
back, rheumatic pains, inflammation OF the
bladder, urinary disorders and weak kid.
neys,
For Sale by, Globe Drugstore.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1909-07-22

Sold by Globe Drugstore.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
When eolna on a journey.

When starting on a journey be sure
to look over your possessions. and
see If you havei
A small workbag or housewife
completely furnished with small sew.
ing materials, thimble, needles. pins,
scissors, black and white thread and
sewing silk. .-darning cotton, hooks and
eyelets. and buttons.
A fru or peD-knife.
A fountain pen, lead pencil. writing
paper, envelopes and tablet. as well
as a portfolio to hold these epistolary
articles.
Brush and comb in a neat ca -e;
whisk broom, and clothes brush. Ad-
dress book, with your own name and
address written on the first page.
A bottle of smelling salts (laven-
der), bottle OF Jamaica ginger, sweet
spirits of ammonia, soda mint tablets,
and small collapsable drinking cup
A hot water bag.
Tooth brush and powder, toilet lano
line or cold cream in tubes.
A hand mirror that viii hang up.
rubber-lined sponge bag. filled
with wash cloths and sponge.
A tiny hair pillow to use in case OF
headache.
A box of crystallized ginger. and a
package of sweet Chocolate no bon
bons.
Talcum powder in a sitting can. so
no pun will be required,
A dark colored silk or woolen wrap
per.
II you wear laced boots or ties. be
sure to carry extra strings and rib
bons for them. And provide your
selves, men and women. with plen'
tiful supply of neat neckwear. These
things are imperative for future com
fort.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

"Concede nothing was the advice
2 a well-known politician concerning
certain famous disputed election.
Is policy was followed to the letter
the man Of whom the Chicago Tri-
ne tells. On the relief train that
I'd been rushed to the scene of the
lway wreck was a newspaper re-
rter.
The first victim he saw was man
rose eyes were blackened and whose
,t arm was in a sling. With his hair
III Of dirt. one end of his shirt collar
rg loose and his coat ripped up
back, the victim was sitting on
le grass and serenely contemplating
he landscape.
How many people are hurt?" asked
he reporter, hurrying up to him.
q haven't heard of anybody being
mrt, young man." said the other.
How did this wreck happen?"
Il haven't heard of any wreck"
"You haven't? Who are you, any
1w?"
Il don't know that it's any of your
jrsiness, but I'm the claim agent OF
lie road. Youths Companion.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

In his address Before the Philadel
phia Conference OF the Methods
Church the other day Bishop Hamil
ton related the following anecdote-tc
illustrate a point;
81 think you are all good-naturec
enough to agree with the young lads
who, vita her Gance, was awaiting 6
street car. After several cars had
passed and they could not get aboart
the young msn became impatient
When the next car STOPPED al the
corner he leapcd upon the platform
and said in plead.ng terms: "Com6
on Mary. We can manage to squeeze
in here. can't we? The youns won.
an colored slightly. bat orayely re
piled, 7 suppose we can, dear Du.
don't you think we had better wal,
until we get home?'"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

man came shooting from a bright
ly lighted window one night, and land
ed with a-crash on the sidewalk
IT'S an right" he said to the
crowd that haa gathered. as he stiihy
arose. "That's my club the Ninth
Precinct I'm a smyth man and
there are ten Jones men in there I'm
goirs back to them. You stay here
and count item as they come out OF
the window"
He limped back into the club. There
was a great uproar Then a figure
crashed through the window, and
struck the Sidewalk with a terrible
noise.
NO" said the figure. rising. don't
star counting yet It's me again"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

Sir. wish to marry your daugh.
.er." faltered the young man.
you do. chr exclaimed the fond
parent "Well. I have been rather ex-
rec.ing this, and. to be thoroughly
orthodox, I shall put a few questions
20 you. Do you drink?"
NO, sir. abhor liquor"
''You do. Ell? Smoker"
q never use tobacco in any form ?"
"Wen, I didn't suppose you ate 1t.
DO you frequent the race course?"
Il never saw horse race in my
ife. sir"
"Um-m-m. Play cards for money!"
"Emphatically no. sir"
'Well. young man l, must say you
ere heavily handicapped. My daugh-
ter is a thorough society girl, and
can't for the l!fe of me see what she
Is going to do with you. However,
s her funeral. and if she wants to
radertake the job she can risk it
Tit-Bits.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

James" cried Mrs Timmid, sitting
Up in bed. there are burglars down
stairs"
"Oh, no. there amt. my dear" re
piled Mr. Timmid.
I'm sure there are"
I'm sure there amt"
q tell you there are"
II tell you there amt"
"Your husband is right. num-" in
terposed a low-browed individual, who
thrust his head into the room at this
juncture We're upstairs"
And as he started down the steps
he was heard TO say to his pal: Il al
ways believe in helping a husband
out whenever l kin. I'm a married
man myself" Louisville Courier
Journal.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

The face can be improved even at
the eye OF sixty. II possible take
-rcltn ent'fiom an expert. You must
rot ex-ect to accomplish as much
'ourseif as an oyrert however. your
IN trestH EFT is better than nothing.
You ask 81 the face viii be apt to
wrinkle scorer IL the use Of creams
and massage are discontinued? De
cidedly no. Massage strengthens the
muscles ana improves the circulation
and the g5od cffe IS should be seen
for long time if~the treatments have
been continued sufficiently long to
mako aEs Improvement. In your case
would advise using the cleansing and
niassage cream every night. In the
morning battle with very cold water
and then use the toilet water.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

From a crowd OF rah-rah college
boys celebrating a crew victory po-
liceman had managed to extract two
prisoners.
What is the charge against these
young men?" asked the magistrate be-
fore whom they were arraigned.
"Disturbin' the peace. yer Honor"
said the policeman. They we're Civ
in their college Sells in the street an
making trouble generally
What is your name?" the judge
asked one of the prisoners.
"R-ro.robert Ro-ro-rollins. suffered
the youth.
Il asked for your name, sir-not
the evidence. "-Everybody's.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

The small white spots which. as
children, we used to count as friend
foe or journey to CO." according to the
finger nail on which they were found.
are generally the result of bruises,
and are considered far from slightly.
These spots can often be removed
by binding the fingers at night with
linen cloth, on which is mixture
of turpentine and myrrh, mixed in
equal parts. In the morning bathe
the finger tips with olive oil.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
The Patient Mule.

The kind-hearted woman was very
solicitous about a mule belonging
to Erastus Pinkley. The mule had
sad and and heavy appearance. and
never looked mere detected than
when its proprietor brought It up with
flourish at the front gate, says a
writer in the Washington Star.
do YOU ever abuse that mule OF
yours2" she inquired one day.
Ian sakes. miss. answered Mr..
Erastuss Il should say mott Dat mule
has had me on de defensive fob de
las six years Youths Companion.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
A TAckv ANEcporE.
He Could not Resist the Temptation
to Play Practical Joke. $40

He Could not Resist the Temptation
to Play a Practical Joke. stu
Some people cannot resist the temp
tation to play practical foxes on limo.
cent victims, A fiend OF that variety
vas aceosted by a man who STAN.
mered badly.
Can you tell me where I can get
some g-g-g-g-good c-c-c-c-carpet TIT.
t-tacks?"
Yes, ertainly," replied the inveter.
ate jokist, fYou turn down this street
to your left. then turn again to your
left and then go straight ahead and
you'll find a hardware store where
you'll be sure to get them"
The stammerer continued his way
and the jotist bolted down the street
and tackled the hardware man first.
"Iiaye you any g-g-g-g'good t-t-t-t'
In t-t-t-taeks2"
Yes. sir" said the obliging store
keeper. producing his best after some
rummaging.
Are you sure th-th-these are g-g-s.
good onesT'
les Ane Desl Nhat are hape.
"Are th-th-the heads g-g-good and
strong?"
Yes. sir"
Have they g-g-osot s-s-s-s-sharp
p-p-ppoints2"
Sure"
well, p-p-p-please s-s-s-s-sit on
them Tt tin get back. will your" he
eaid. making a dash for the door,
Presently the unlucky stammerer
arrived ct the store. and. entering.
assed innoeently, Have you any g-g-
good t-tt'n t-t-t-taeks-?"
When he recoy he asked. in a
somewhat dazed fashion. whether he
hor Sc had fallen on him. or u It was
simply an SUPPLEMENTARY.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

Oil OF sweet almonds, 4 ounces;
Glycerine. l Il ounces; Orange flow
er water. ounces; White wax. 6
drains; srermaced. G. drains; Borax
2 drams; oil Of neroh, 10 drops; OIL
OF petit-grain. Is drops.
Melt the wax and spermaceu in a
double boiler, then add the oil. Dis
solve The borax in the orange flower
water. then add the glyoerine. Shake
well and add them slowly to the oils
When nearly cold. add the perfume,
beat until cold.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
Gaelic oIssppearIna.

In submitting a report to the Argyle
synod (Church OF ScOtIand) on he
administration Of a beQuest wi lieh
provides scholarships for Gaelic
speaking divinity students. Rev. p.
Mackichan lamented that, whereas SE
years ago candidates we're drawn
from the whole Of the Highlands.
they were now restricted to the west
ern seaboard and the Hebrides. The
church must keep in mind, he said.
that large numbers OF the peasantry
stiI used Gaelic habituaily. but the
feeling was growing that TO make
use of il publicly was an indication Of
lowered social and scholastic post
ton.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

Z "A noted horsenien tells the story OF
a man who entered horse in a GER
tain race and made bet on it.
When the horses got away the man
stood with the field-glasses glued to
his eyes, watching the progress Of
his favorite.
Some of the men who knew OF the
bet crowded around and asked how
the horse was going.
We'll" was the reply, 81 can't just
make out whether he is the last in
the third race or the first in the
fourth. h."-Lippincott's.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

AIS well with the world. my friend
ana there isn't an ache chat lasts; all
troubles will have an end and the
ruins and the bitter blasts; there is
sleep when the toll Is done@ there's
substance beneath the foam and thC
bully OLD yellow sun win shine ul
the COWS come home. ANS wen witl
the world my friend, Your tar
the distance beams; and the burdeu
that makes You bend is merely q
bunch Of dreams7 10 music serene anu
fine. the woods and the streams gitv
tongue; and the colpulent sun wAi
shine. ull the last OF the dogs Is
hungl-Walt Mason in Empofia Ga
zette.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
RritaIn,s Coal Troubles.

We hear a great deal in these times
of the folly and wickedness of war
between civilized peoples. What,
then, shall be said of industrial civil
war in our midst? In every dispute
there must always be a reasonable
middle course. II it cannot be found
that is nothing shoit of a disgrace tc
our civilization.-LOndon Weekly
Dispatch.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
A TALE OF TWO PARROTS.
Popular Young Minister Uses II to
Point Moral.

FopulaF noAH9 WiHtet~i 9D' -
Point Moral.
Rev. Philip c. Fletcher. the most
eloquent and popular Of St. Louis
younger ciergymen. was discussing
the oiter day the sermon wherein he
said BE- saw no harm in cosmetics.
"What meant in that sermon"
said MIR. Fletcher. smiling. was that
a woman owed 1t to herself to make
the most OF her looks According to
some people, advised every woman
to lay on powder land paint with
trowe l. would never think OF giving
,ch advice. OF course. Such advice.
coming from the pulpit would have
q strange sound -as strange a sound
as the talk Of the minister's parrot
"A certain minister called on an old
lsiy. and found a new parrot in her
parlor. This parrot kept saying every
little while:
81 wish the old girl would diel
"The minister turned his head to
conceal a smile.
but I think I can set this mat
ter right for you. dear madam he
said. 4. too. have q parrot, as you
know. II is a very honest bird. Its
talk la very edifying. III send it here
and It will soon guide your own parrot
into decent speech.
"He sent on his parrot that even
Ing. TIE grateful old lady put the
birds Side by side. Then with pleas
ed smile she prepared to listen to
their conversation.
81 wish the old girl would die.
said the parrot host.
"And the guest rolled his eyes ant
ddclaimed solemnly:
we beseech thee to hear US, goo
Lordp"
THE DESTINATION
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

Physicians have long been looking
for q harmless headache cure. n
has been produced by an eminent
chemist Of the National Capital. II
is knoVn as BRoMo-P -PEPsIN. Besides
curink every form of headache
instantly. Bromo Pepsin is equally
and as promptly e6icacicus in
chronic and acute indigestion and
the nervous disorders incident there
o. It is effersscent and pleasant
to take and may be had Of all up-tc
date druggists at ten cents a bottle.
1t comes as q boon to mankind anc
womankind. For sale at G. o.
Armstrong. Druggist.
oaOaoaOAOAOa0AoAenOA0a0AOA
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
PATS Dsfsienoies.

Mrs. McCarthy's husband went out
In boat alone, the boat overturned
and he was drowned. A friend met
her some weeks later,
Il hear" said he. that Pat left you
very wen off-that he left you $780,
600"
True said Mrs. Mccarthy. He
did"
How was that?" asked her friend.
Pat couldn't read nor write. could
he?~
mo" said Mrs Mccarthy. nor
swim"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
Forearmed.

Louisville man who was. enter
ing the tobacco business wanted a
name for a new brand that he was
20 put on the market, according to
Success. He finally decided on "Anti-
Trust" and forwarded 1t, along with
the necessary papers. to the Patent
ONCE at Washington. A few days
later he received the following mes
sage:
Brand Antitrust registered BY
the American Tobacco Company"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26
As Roesorrom WORKED.
Not the Best Way to Build Up a Big
Business.


n. W. Aver. the advertising agent,
at the dinner in Philadelphia, in hon
or Of his firms fortieth anniversary,
said that to succeed in advertising re-
quired hard work.
THE successes in this business are
stupendous," he said. but some folks
think that working as Roebottom Of
Camden worked a man can build up
a great advertising fortune.
'Roebottom was roofer. He was
engaged on a Mickle street house.
One day. as he was lunching. he was
heard to give yell of pain.
whats the matter. RoebottomT ?
a carpenter asked.
al got a nail in my foot,I. the roof
er answered.
"'weli, why don't you pull it outr
said the carpenter.
What In my dinner hourr
yelled Roebottom. reproachfully.--
philadelphia Record.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

]. E. M.-There is no way to pre-
vent the fine hairs appearing on the
face, but they can be removed with a
depilatory. If they are fine and light
l would advise you not to remove
them, as they will return again. All
depilatories only remove the hair for
time. If the hairs are dark you can
bleach them with peroxide.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-11-26

Little Johnnie owned couple OF
bantam hens which laid very small
eggs. this fact being .displeasine tC
the youngster. Going TO the f1wlrua
one morning, Johnnie's father was
surprised to ind a goose egg tied "a
one OF the beams and above il a caro-
with the words: Keep your eye OF
this and do your hest"