davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1909-04-28

Fay Weayh, the l7-year-old son Of
Tom Weavil, is confined 20 his home
with very severely fractured limb.
While riding down hi.l in . buggy, his
foot was caught in one Of the wheels
and terribly twisted, and the ankle
twice broken. The injury is most
severe, but it is hoped that II will not
be lasting in its effect.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1909-04-28
E1pression II Gratitude

The family of the late ]. y. Miller
greatly appreciate services willingly
rendered during their be oreavement, and
sincerely thank the school district and
other friends for their kindness.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1909-04-28

The CENSOR would urge upon all per-
sons interested the necessity, even duty,
of attending the annual meeting of the
cemetery association on Monday, May g.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
INVESTMENTS
Brick Cottage

ZOO CASH.
Anyone wishing a small home In a good
neighborhOOd on easy payments, would not
need to look further than this. Be sure 10
call up Monday.
THE BYRON REED CO.,
Tells. Doug. 2s7. A 1854 IA S. ltth ST.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

GROUND FLOOR N. Y. LIFE BLDG.
s.. ao-Six-room modern house, with open
plumbing. lot 40xl02. in first-class
repair; $1,000 cash required.
s., 25o-Nlne-room house, with bath, plate
glass windows and door. house only
three years old. full lot. nice avn
and fence, house built by days
work; one block from car, north
part Of city.
50, 60o-Nice siX-room all modern house. on
Webster st. car line.
"A, ~eoO-Splendid bargain in an eight-room
all modern house, only three years
| old: located in Dundee, near car
line; south front
*, N0-Ono OF the new and entirely modern
homes, on one of the best streets In
Kountze Place; has splendid system
OF hot water heat, extra fine gns
and electric light fixtures, fine bath
room with expensive Furnishings, IN
GLIDING pedestal laVatory and white
glass knobs and towel rack; a good
home for the most particular.
50, 750-For two very choice eight-room
houses in the West FRrnam district,
east front and entirely modern; now
earning better than 10 per cent net
on price asked; will sell separately.
A,O00-Buys one Of tho best all modern
houses in Orchard Hill, situated on
paved street, south front, lot boxl5o;
a bargain.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

Advertisements for the vvnnt "a
cOlumns viii be takes uatil IL M. for
tho evening edition and untn $50 ,.
m. fer the morning and Sunday edis
lions.
Cash must accompany All orAers for
want ads aud NO advertisement will
be accepted for less than 40 cents for
first Insertion.
Rates apply 90 either The Daily or
Sunday Bee.
Away count sin words 60 q nnes
CASH RATES ron WANT ADS.
REGULAR QUALIFICATION - One
snsertiSn, 4 Ia esnts per worA and 4
cent Per wePa fer each subsequent
~tnseFtioH. Each Insertion made en-
q days, 4 Ia cents per verdi $3.50
Der liaS per month.
want a for rae nee ma be left
1t RAy Of the following drag stores
one II your cOPae dFuKstst"-they
are ali branch offices for TIE Zee
and your al will ~ Inserted Just a.
promptly and Pm the same rates As at
the main office IN n nee BuildinE,
! se~VenteeAth and FarnRm reefs
' Albach, w. c., 10Th and Farnam.
Beranek. s. A.. ItOS 8. 18th 81.
Becht Pharmacy, Benson, Neb.
Bemls Park Pharmacy. sd and Cunning.
Blake's Pharmacy, 2S6 Sherman Ave.
Coughlin, G. r., 9Th and Pierce SITS.
Clifton Hill Pharmacy zn8 Military Ave
Conte, J. b., 3lst Ave. and Farnam o.
Crissey Pharmacy, 9th and Lake SITS.
Cormak, Emil 1204-S s. 18TH st.
Ehlers. p. H. aO2 L~eavsnworth st.
Foster g. Arnold. rs N. 18th b.
Freytag. John J., p1t N. Ath 81.
Florence Drug Co., Florence, Neb.
GTeenough, u. A., 1924 s. 18th st.
Hanscom Park Pharmacy. 1t1 8. 18th 8,
Hayden, William c., 500 Farnam St
Hoist, John 64 N. 18th St.
HUFF, A. L.. &4 Leavenworth St
King, II. S., 2s3S Farnam st.
Kountze Place Pharmacy, 26O1 N. 24th 81
Lathrop, Charles e, 132i N. 2tth 81.
Patrick Drug Co.. 1902 N. 3lth 81
Snyder Pharmacy, aoth and Lake SITS.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
REAL ESTATE
CITY PROPERTY FOR SALE
CContinued.)
NEW HOMES
READY TO MOVE INTO

~$2,150-Northeast corner 33rd
and armore Ave A dandy 6rom cottage on full corner lot With fine slightly
cadon ant beautiful view. Has enented cellar and Is modern except heat WIN
sell OIL easy terms
$2350-2523 Camden Avenue,
rooms new, modern except heat fine arr angement of rooms Very well built full
Easy terms
2r350-3611 North 29th Street
A nice Eroom, mOden cottage lot RS1@ fet sewer. water gas ad cement side
walks.
$~2,500-3307 Fowler Avenue '
A fine nav wei built veil arranged 6room modern house, high slightly location,
close to school Rd car line; full lot
$2,5O0-2725 Pinkney Street
and kitchen on first floor open stairway = Moe bedrooms and bath on ID floor
Owner will mako reasonable terms
$280O-2605 Fort Street
A big snap In q very we'll built erOom. ali modern house Built ~ good carpenter
for a home; good furnace good plumbing full lot Easy terms
So, 750-1408 Madison Avenue
A splendid full 2stry square house. oak finish and floors All nice sized rooms
modern Ind complete in very way; good urnacei paved street and paving
all paid; sodded yard. nCe shade trees win sn or reasonable terms Come in
$3,750-2223 Lothrop Street
HnMh' and no6p; N rooms nicely decorated screens complete cement walks
s%dd yard street being paved; nice reception hall paror dining room and Kitchen
attic; viii make reasonable terms OPEN TODAY.
$3,800-3H9 North Oath Street
A fine we'll built house. in good location. GOOD lot paved street paving ~ paid, oak
nnsh and noors large living room Will make reasOnabl terms OPEN TODAY
Come nut and see It
$5,OO0-1619 Spencer Street
A beautiful home in a splendid location Me new and expensive houses are being
built in KOuptse Place. than in any other oddiu SSGn.S in the S Sn% "a ossSp SnS tS st is
rSepaon hall good panor AM dining room. large buffers panuy, kitchen ant rear
rooms are finished with white ename. The sreets paved nd tn paving all paid
II you see his house yOu wi buy It
OFFICE OPEN MONDAY AND SATURDAY EVENINGS,
TTNTTT, $40.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
DEATH AND FUNERAL NOTICES.

HoDSoN-Henry, aged 80 years Z months
10 days, Saturday, 7:A q m.
Funeral from family residence. Iii Blaine
street Tuesday at $40 a. IN. to St. Pat
rick's church, at s:B o. m, IntsEmsnt Holy
Sepulcher cemetery.
HULrMANJennio M. widow OF the late
Frank A. Huffman, September q, 1903.
Funera service Sunday afternoon, Sep
Sember ~ at : o'clock, from family resi-
dencs, $40 North Forty-first avenue. In
tsrment Forest Lawn cemetery.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
HASTINGS.& HEYDEN
1914 Harnev Street Conservative Bldg
Fl. W. GATES
Room GIT New York Life Bldg.
Phone Douglas 1894


1,650-Five-room cottage, modern
except furnace, lot 3Ox119, on Ohio
ear 21st
S2,OOO-Five-room cottage with
bath and gas, lot S0x14O, on 18th and
Burdette.
S2,6OO-Five-room new house, hall,
parlor, dining room and kitchen on
first floor; two bedrooms and modern
bath upstairs; corner lot, 4ox123.
2,750-New siX-room house, hall,
parlor, dining room and kitchen on
first floor; three bedrooms upstairs;
south front lot; at 2610 Spencer st.
S2,600-Six-room two-story house
In good order, on Locust, just east of
cath; modern but heat; lot 40x145.
SO, 2OO-Six-room modern house at
'2427 Spencer; lot 4Ox127; well To-
Gated.
S3,s6O-seven-room new modern
house with hot water heat, imitation
mahogany finish, well built; east front
lot, 40x127.
S3,5OO-Seven-room 2-story house
on N. oath near Fort street; city
water, gas, furnace, barn; ground 82x
800; with blackberries. cherries. APP
pies and shade trees; a nice place ia
raise chickens.
3Sxl19, cornef 29th and Grant, with
water and sewer, only $3.50.
4Ox11O, corner 25tn and Grant, for
$500.
6Ox127, south front on Franklin.
near 34th, for $3.50
50x124, on Pinkney near 18th. for
$3.50.
Five acres Of nice laying ground
northwest OF end Of Ames Ave. car
line at $500 per acre.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
REAL ESTATE
CITY PROPERTY FOR SALE.
CContlnued.)
GLOVER REALTY SYNDICATE
Ground Floor, New York Life

Ground Floor, New York Life
Buys neat 6room cottage No. ed s l. modern except heat lGgs bar.
.SG0-Buys good 6room cottage on 18th. S I boulevard near AXE st, bath toilet
house and pay difference
1890 Buys, SToonl two+Ory al modern house. cornerl lot 9th and sprague EASY
$500 Buys Ed Capitol Ave, new Groom t wo-aory all modern, corner lot W. paved
$500 Buys lSn Dodge ST. a mighty neat sroom SOdSef fully modern, oak finish;
built for a home large lot fruit reesa and grapevinA. Built this year A
A7O-Buys best cOseIn modern" Rome W e know of for the money; built by Os Of
me pest contractors in city for q n me two stories and atuc oak nnishi w
nome all round paving pld on % tn streets
A0-Bu new house, Bems Park s oons, oak finish begto of hot water heaung;
$500 Buys tia new house. m GeofEa a We Just South II Hickory St. best arrange
Lroom house we know Of; large Hyi ng room oak finish, bookcases built in,
tioot porch Tine east front lot NxL o. paving paid TERMS. Look at his
@EO-BSys' Sroom modern home IN Park Ave In HansomP Park district nearly
.SSO-Buys that new sToon srcuy nod em house building OF SD St. across street
ire IRON roN MeS@ Sth adn66rHs d nnge homes one block n9 rom HHanscSm park LLsgS, IIn.
ySroom modern ome /" West Fansm% district near sd ad Farnam,
pay rent?
INVESTMENTS THAT PAY YOU WELL
3T1-Rent $40 a month sd water-a bHck fiat Z blocks of postofnce; paving paid
M7N- Rent $50 a month; St Louis hat W ell located, new; paving paid both streets.
N5M-te $50 M water w lOrOom bri lex flats corn lot close in;a lwaysr rented.
&@--RRsemtt 81 81 'neE na dRes .G dsG dS %s : i 10 on d b&o 4SstP 81 .eon.r lot e.s; paving
paid aIwaysr enedit tenants pay W a%r rent; $4,000 cash required balance 81
%HO-kent Na a month"; w. new flats W III located; corner lot paving paid both
N2aO- Rent $40 a MONTH; 5 STcE Hats a nd frame house; close in cn arrange
terms
Full lot on Boulevard, Creighton First add, at $500; cheapest lot to be had in
NxnG 18th snd California. paving paid so nth front 1885, This lot being sold under
administrators SALE ant Is 400 CHI eaper than any our lot in hat block
Fine for residence or fats
GLOVER REALTY SYNDICATE,
Ground Fl. n. Y. Life Both Phones
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
WEST FARNAM RESIDENCE
$4,000
Ground Fl. N. Y. Life

Fol the Shiverick residence,
located at the southeast cor
ner of 3Sth and Jones streets.
This house is exceptionally
well built Of brick and stone
and originally cost moro than
Is now being asked for the
entire property. The main
floor has ak rooms and large
hall with handsome selected
oak, hand-carved stairway.
Parlor, library and reception
room finished in mahogany.
Dining room finished and pan
elled with selected quarter
sawed oak. Two large fire
places. Six bright and airy
bedrooms on second floor,
with large closets, three OF
of which have open fireplaces.
Selected Quarter-sawed oak
floors throughout Third floor
has four good rooms besides
large cedar closet. Basement
under entire house, divided
into -furnaoe-room, laundry
room, storage and dying
rooms. Fine three-story brick
barn, with driveways in real
This complete residence To-
GATED on one OF the choice
corners in the West FRrnam
district, S2x1T7 feet Very rSa~
enable terms.
GORGE & COMPANY, 1901 Farnam
Telephone Douglas 76S."
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
HANSCOM PARK HOME

In the west side Hanscom Park district We nave for sleo one of the most COM
and cold water in one or to Of the bed rooms; one of the finest billiard rooms in
the city Ruud hot water heaterf furnishing nunuo supply of hot water ct all
times: Lot G11O IT, fine variety of small fruit large garage
eau ~ US to see The mousse d for pree
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
OTHER HOUSES.
UTHER HOUSES
We Did Not Build These Ourselves, But They Are All Good
Bargains or We Would Not Advertise Them.

: LOO 1872 Parker st, 6 rooms water md gas Lot aMN IT
RR6o-lNl s. astS st, nice broom cottage modern except heat fTtcass Sub
8 5000 St Meredith Ave. Brand new sroO m house. entirely, modern. including fur.
mace gas and electric lights, sewer connection, permanent walks one block
from street car. Fine south front lot ad very hard to beats at tn money
.aeo-SS Farnam St. modern" eroom residence on paved street w blocks from
Farnam. car very desirable nelghborhood. Fine trees and fruit in the yard.
: &So-spienGd bungalow near Hansoom Park, 1sn s sh St, sroOms strictly mod
5 400 Fins modern hot WaSr heated house two tories 6 rooms oak nnsn, soft
5 6aO-EFcom history square house. hot water heat and oak tmsh. OF the Central
|. $50 -Finest house for the 1moneS In tn Fled Club district 1889 s 18th Ave A
Mission design Bed rooms finished in natural bh md white enamel Bath
room tiled Large attic This mouse has sdeboard, chna cupboard, book
eases. ornamental seats beam ceilings and many other attractive features
pull, IN Electric fixtures very choice and artistic Large screened sleeping
it Key at our office
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
LOTS
CREIGHTON'S FIRST ADDITION,
South Of Hanscom Park

Has been one Of the best sellers in the city A few choice lots
from $3.50 to $780, Terms " cash, balance easy.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
HERE'S THE LIST:

: 2&o-nS Parker ST., 6room bungalow, lot Axis IT., permanent walks ever water
.. city, ad conpheey decorated ready for occupancy
go St., 6Toomb bungalow, -four rooms downstairs, with bath, and two
above, Fine cenented cellar with hollow tile walls Insurhng dryness me
warmth House completely, decorated Sewer, water. gas. electric light per-
5 4O0-fH4 Decatur St., 6Toom dweHng; wing room. dining ROOM kitchen and one
bed room downstairs; two extra large bed rooms above with bath. Book
pt In; yard sodded ad shrubs set OUT ali walks put down one of the most
above uuidsmL
) L2O-For the mentcoa house. $40 Parker St hi Is something new and is
mighty fine; buNto of hollow tile and coated With cement on the outside, very
tasteful and wonderfully durable, warm d dry. House has four rooms down
and two above best plumbing, combination fixtures complete decorations
i 400 1929 Parker St, twostryS room house finished in sweet gun with oak
noorsi thoroughly modern in every respect and most artistic. Has to be
ready to putt the fnbho on M the woodwork viii take . beautiful shogan
or natural color, as tn buyer prefers
5 4@o-The most beautiful I'M artistic bungalow in tn city, W o bar none, at the
Prize TSei r S@ P sI5 has I; sS %6t df%nt, by "a ao IT %eeR: l%d off porch eior serPss
Toom INT white enamel for the bed rooms. hi living room in this hOme
saw In its line We viii decorate It to suit yI Wv
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

Births-VinceassEo CoTcitto, SO Pierce,
girl; Peter Mascorvi, lab South Eleventh
street boy; John M. Holden, ISIS Lizard,
boy; Jacob Meyer, 141f Dodge, boy.
D~eRths-Aaron Coleman. 1881 Nlcholaa. "A
years; Harry Christensen, 1921 North TWen-
ty-fifth, 3 years; MRcella L. Walford, sls
North Thirty-fourth, 2 years; Joel g.
Wright, 64 Locust, % years; Mrs. Marie
Krause, 2olS Pierce. 81 years.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
BUILDING LOTS IN BEST
RESIDENCE DISTRICTS

$4,000 I23 feet frontage on
Lincoln Boulevard. One of
the choicest locations in Be-
mis- park. Fine shade trees.
East front. Close to car. Ex-
cellent location for q home.
ST. 800 for 70 IT on 2sth St.,
just south of Howard St
Paving in and paid for. BI-
oellent location for good flats
or frame houses for rent.
This IL the cheapest piece OF
property in this locality.
$500. Box1Z6 IT., located on
S2d St Just north OF Dodge St
Several new houses near II.
One lot just north OF this
sold recently for $3.50 cash.
Nonresident owner anxious
20 sell. Hence this low price.
$3.50 each for a few lots In
Dundee, we'll located, with oe- Z
ment walk, sewer and trees in
street. Close to car line. 800
cash. balance SO per month.
These are the cheapest lots in
Dundee with improvements
included
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

Attention. Painters Local Union
No. 1O9.
Nominations of delegates 20. 1909 con-
vention. Full attendance requested, Mon
day, September q.
WIN. L. MURRAY. Secretary.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
IN CREIGHTON'S SECOND ADDITION
on Military Ave. and Parker s.

=. ,.- on Military W. and Parker St
Ihese houses were built by us to establish the character of the addition and
day.
Yu car buy then for nefourth cash. balance same as rent Terms arranged
suit opnThta@T 8 Per cent interest on deferred payments Houses are sbso-
move in % can afford to buy a home until yOu ook at these. 1t means dollars
Inc comfort as vel to you
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26
PETERS TRUST CO..

GEORGE & COMPANY, 1901 Farnam S
Telephone Douglas 76S,"
Omaha daily bee., 1909-09-26

D. V. SHOLES CO,
Ill Board of Trade Bldg. Telephones: Douglas 40;
10th and Farnam SITS. Independent A-2O49.
SIX NEW HOMES

Absolutely modern, strictly up-to-date, splendidly built,
artisticaly designed. prices low and terms easy.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-05-16

l We take our editorial pen in Ihand this week to write a red hot editorial on the "Bingville Fire lDepartment-What is it Good ForH
 We have been thinking of writ ing a editorial on this subjeckt for some time, and we would of wrote it sooner if we had of thought it would of did any good. We have often wrote on this subjeckt be- fore, but what has been the result ? nothing. As editor and proprie- ter of the Bugle, we are supposed to sway publick sentiment in this collum and to mold human opin- ion for them as aint got any opin- ions of their, own; yet we don't seem to have made much progress in seckuring better fire depart ment in our midst.
 The Bingville Fire Department lis a menase to sivilizashion/
 It's all run down at the heel and unless something is did to improve 1t, this town is liable to be the scene of one of the worst conflagra- shions which ever conflagerated in this naborhood.
 Jason Tucker, Cheef of the Bingville Fire Department, seems to of went to sleep at his post, as you might say. If Jase had any git-up-and-git to him, he would reckonstruckt the Bingville Fire Department so that it would com pare with fire departments else where, and not be a disgrase to this town. We made it our business to visit the basement of the town hall last week to find out just what the Bingville Fire Department consists of and all it consists of is Il wa ter pails, ' of whom have the hoops busted off leaving only 4 good wa ter pails, which will hold water to fight fire with.
 Suppose a big fire was to break out in our midst when we aint ex- peckting it? What could our fire department do with 4 measley wa ter pails? What happened last fall when Deacon SnodgFasse's hen house ketched fire in the morning Jason Tucker had left early on a business trip to the Go. seat, talk ing the key of the town hall base ment with him and when the fire broke out and the alarm was sounded, nobody couldn't get into the basement for the 4 water pails, and after Jason got back late in the afternoon, learned about the fire and responded promptly, he was disgusted to find that the fire
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-05-16
lOkaI Eieins

Bige Winslow has fed up all his hay to his stock and is now feeding them on bailed hay, which he has to draw all the way from the Go. seat Bige says his stock is slowly eating their heads off. A stranger whose name we did not learn passed through Bingville last Tues day on horse back. He stopped at Hen Weathersby's store to purchase some to- packer and pass the time of day, but did not state who he was or what his busi- ness or where he was bound for. Why are some people so close mouthed
 Miss Amelia Tucker, our refining so- siety queen, is not wearing her engage ment ring any more, and 1t is roomeEed that all is over between her and Clarence Stringer, who, 1t was said, Amelia would be united with in the holy bonds of matrimony next June Sad, sad, if true. As we go to press it looks as if we might have a shower. If this perdick- shion pkoves true we will make a an- nounserhent to that effeckt in next weeks 3ugie
 --Amzi Gookins resently had a stitch between the house and the barn. and could hardly get to the house. He is now wearing a mustard plaster and hopes to be Up and about soon.
 Lem Brown, our eckspert carpenter, while repairing Cyrus Hoskins front yard fence tother day smashed his thumb with hatchet. Lem says that he generally manages in his carpentering business to keep thumb or a finger smashed most all the time.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-05-16
Personal

While out cutting briars in bogg last week Brad Hinsley acksidentally cut a hole in one of his boots with the briar cythe, and was a good cal put out about it, too. You ort to be glad, Brad, that you didn't cut your fool foot of.
 Mrs. Cyrus Hoskins announces that she will give tea party to wich Mrs. Eph Higgins will not be invited. Mrs. Higgins give a tea party about weeks ago to wich Mrs. Hoskins was not i'm vited.
 Hen Weathersby, prop of our general store, is madder than a wet hen because his new spring goods, which he ordered in January. has not arroye yet Hen says unless these goods arrive soon, the parties he bought them of might as well keep them until next spring.
 Miss Mary Ann Whitaker is trubbied with breaking out on her face to sich a eckstent that she is almost ashamed to be seen in publick. Mary Ann thinks her blood is outen order and has been taking burdock bitters and sassafras tea for what ails her.
 Personals is not very noomrus this week owing to what we do not know. Some weeks personals is plentifuller than others and again they be sckaircer than hens teeth.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-05-16
New Hat for Phoebe

s' Miss Phoebe Hiiderbrand, our fash ionable dressmaker and milliner, ap- peared at church last Sunday with the dog gondest hat on that was ever saw in this house of worship This hat is about IS inches wide and a foot and a half high and looks like a milk pail turned up side down. Miss Phoebe says it's a Bucket" hat, which is the latest thing in women's hats up to date. Phoebe set in front of Mrs Cy Hoskins and Mrs.
 Hoskins says she never got a sight of the preacher. during the service from the time Phoebe set down there until after the benedickshion>was pronounced. Dea- con Andrews says he don't see how Phoebe can wear such a turrible big hat as that without having awful hedackes afterwards. It is a questchion in our minds whether or not Phoebe ort to ad- vertise her millinery business in church.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-05-16
VandayIie Heard From

Editor Bingville Bugle-It is with great admirashion and really jellusy that we write to you as man of sterling worth, as you mite say, and not afraid of anybody or anything. When we got copy (by acksident) of the BingvilIe Bugle last week-or maybe 1t was cupple of weeks ago-we said to our self: There's "a paper wich is worthy of being in every respectable home in America, and espeshially should it be in Vandaylie"-Oh, that Vandaylie had sich paper Oh, for man that stands up for a just cause and don't let nobody tell him when he's rong. If they was any way that we could get you and your worthy periodical Gas Ed Waymire our well read P. M., and chicken raiser, says), to come out here and sivilize the natives of this town, we would gladly do it. It does seem to me that when man has a worthy cause he is never ap- preshiated. Look at Columbus-noNody believed him, they say-and then what did George Washington say when he crossed the Delaware River? Didn't he say, "The first in war is the first in pieces?"
 Now, Mir. Editor, you just keep on ploddin along and your cause will be took up all over the Eastern and West ern Hemisferes. Just keep a stiff upper lip and you'll come out all right in the end. Admiringly yours,
 WILLIAM HIRAM WATTS HUNT.
 Offishial reporter for Vandaylie P s. When l see the gaul of some people get so gosh rammed mad I can hardly hold myself. Is this Hi Tender son the same Hi what left Vandaylie 5 odd years ago? If he is, he owes me for load of corn cobs contracted on or about that time.