davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03
STORIES DEMONSTRATING
TAFT'S SENSE OF HUMOR

house, for the fres had been out nearly
two hours. With such haste as he could
make in the dark he went down the stairs
and jerked the receiver from the hook.
"Hello!" he cried in not too friendly
tone.
Hello! Is that you, Mr. Secretaryr'
came in an ingratiating tone over the
wire.
Yes, 1t Is"
well, Mr.. Secretary. hated to disturb
you. but this is Blank" The gentleman
on the other end thus made himself
known as newspaper correspondent.
'.wellr said tho Secretary Of War,
what on earth is the matter?"
Again the tone became extremely in
gratiating and humble, with these words:
..Nothing's the matter. Mr.. Secretary.
But my paper has been bothering the life
out of me tonight for a story. I've got
ten a dozen kilograms from the office
telling me I must send some sort Of a
story. And I knew you always had some
story you could give me. Couldn't you
give me a good story tonight, Mr.. Sec
retary?
For a moment the Secretary of War,
the most trusted member Of the Roose-
welt cabinet was naturally angry, very
angry and, IL the correspondent had been
in the same house with him, he might
have been properly rebuked. Then the
secretary saw the funny side of the mat
ter. With the receiver still in his hand,
as he leaned against the wan Of that
cold house in the darkness Of early morn
ing Mr. Taft broke into peals Of laughter.
His laughter is the heartiest imagfnab bic,
and 1t lasted for two or three minutes.
When he could get enough breath to
speak, he put his mouth to the transmit
ter and contented himself with saying
laughingly:
mo, Blank: haven't q thing you
could use tonight"
Then, still laughing, he hung mp the rec
ceiver and made his way back to bed.
through the cold. dark house. He SUI
fered some physical discomfort at the
time, but the laugh he got out Of it then
and has gotten out Of 1t since moro than
repaid him. This incident establishes be-
You'd dispute the real sense Of humor he
has.
When he was making his now famous
40-day compaign through the country and
speaking from 10 to 1S times a day, that
ability to laugh and see the funny side
stood him In good stead. One afternoon
when he had finished ten-minute tall,
from the rear platform Of his car In a lit
tie village. in Minnesota, grizzled old
Swede rushed up and shouted:
You're going to get our votes. Bill
Taft"
Mr.. Taft leaned over the car railing,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03

From the Washington Post
OF the millions of people who have seen
hundreds of pictures of the Taft smile,
very few realize what a brilliance of wit
and graciousness of humor lie behind that
irresistibly attractive face.
To say that President Taft has sense
of humor does not express one-half OF
what should be told about his capacity
for enjoying life and for seeing, quick as
lighting. the funny and the amusing in
life. Taft is the greatest story teller who
ever occupied the White House, with the
possible exception of Abraham Lincoln.
There are many who think he can tell a
story better than Lincoln did, because he
can act the incidents he narrates and the
attributes of the people he describes. An
other great difference between the two
men is that. while Lincoln's stories were
sometimes 'off-color," Taft's never are.
But it is not the Presidents ability as
a story-teller which proves his sense OF
humor. His keenness of insight and his
immediate recognition Of the humorous In
any place where it appears are absolute
gifts. gracious gifts which make his life
and the lives of those who come into con-
tact with him infinitely pleasanter than
they would be without the illumination OF
these qualities which are so wonderfully
well developed in him.
And the final conclusive argument that
he has great sense Of humor lies in the
fact that he can see the humor and the
Joke when they are at his own expense.
Had to Have a Story.
One cold winter morning shortly after
midnight at time when the now Presi-
dent was Secretary of War, he was awak-
ened by the ringing of the telephone bell
on the first floor of his house. He lay
awake in bed on the second floor and
hoped that the operator would give up the
task of getting reply as hopeless. Evil
IDENTIFY. however, Central was being
urged on to renewed and finally ceaseless
efforts by the person at the other end OF
the WIRE The bell rang and rang. AT
last when he could stand it no longer
Mr.. Taft took unto himself the additional
clothing Of bedroom slippers and dressing
robe He made his way slowly to the
head Of the stairs finding during his prog
ress across his room that, inadvisedly, he
had left every rocking chair in such a
position that it came into violent contact
with his legs at pretty much every step
The telephone was continuing it's I'M
earthly clamor. 1t was very cold in the
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03

north and west In Baldwin county IA
South Alabama. Imposing lodge buildings
are to be erected at Atlanta, Ga, Ma
con. Ga, and Birmingham, Ala. Plans
for a 100000 church at birmingham, Ala.
were accepted. Pratt City. Ala, awarded
the contract for substantial improve
ments, and various cities in the two
states are inviting paving proposals. Thir-
teen new corporations. with minimum
capital stock of $4,000. were formed
during the week. As usual. great many
sales of city realty and farm lands are
reported -
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03
Trials POSTPONED.

Rockland. Me-, November 2-Thick
weather conditions made 1t necessary to
postpone the Standardization trials on the
new battleship North Dakota, which were
to have been held today. If conditions
improve the trials will be held tomorrow
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03
Mayors Elected.

Columbus, O., November Mayors
were elected today in all Ohio cities. Re-
turns from Is municipalities show that
the republicans carried six, the demo-
Gratis seven and the independents two.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-11-03

NOTICE-Best Framing at
the lowest prices. The Birming-
ham Picture Framing Co., 1910
Fourth Ave-. BIRMINGHAM.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Gilbreath is Honored.

President Eugene d. Funk of
the National Corn Association has
appointed w. G. Gilbreath of
Bismarck, vice-president of the as
sociation for North Dakota, a po-
sition of honor, as in it Mr.. Gil
breath is the representative of ag-
ricultural interests of North Da-
kota in the work of the association
and the National Corn Exposition.
As Commissioner of Agriculture
Mr.. Gilbreath is preparing to
make an exhibit at the National
Corn Exposition in Omaha De-
cember 6 to 18. The position to
which he has been appointed will
bring North Dakota into closer
touch with men everywhere who
are working to improve American
grain crops.
In the Corn Association as
we'll as in the National Corn Ex-
POSITION" the word corn is used
in it's continental sense, the small
grains such as are grown in North
Dakota receiving equal attention
with corn
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
BANK ROBBED OF
FouRI1HOUSAND
YECCMEN BLEW The SAFE WITH CLY.
CERINE AND GETAWAY WITH
MONEY EASILY.

Lisbon,fN. D.,l May 81. The
First State. bank of Englevale, at
Englevale, this county, was bur-
glarized some time last night, the
yeggmen succeeding in getting
away.with $4,000. There is no
clue to the perpetrators of the
crime though every effort is being
made to locate the men who sue
cessfully blew open the safe of the
institution.
The burglary, from the stand
point of the yeggmen, was entire
ly successful. The men made
their way into the building thru
rear door with the use of jimmy.
Once inside their work was easy.
Two charges of nitro glycerine
opened the doors of the big safe,
a Diobold, and in a few minutes
the men had the coveted loot.
The institution carried $1,000
insurance policy with the Empire
State Insurance company of New
York, of which Hatcher Bros. of
Grand Forks and Fargo are the
state agents. H: F. Offer is the
president of the institution. j. L.
Offer the vice-president and Will
liam Narum is the cashier.
The State Bankers association
has a standing reward for the cap
ture of the men who perpetrated
the crime and a thorough search
will be made for them.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
COUNTY SEAT
CASE UP AGAIN
CRAWFORD RESERVES IT FOR The
PRESENT-.-PERMANENT NJUNC.
ton WANTED.

Grand Forks, May 21.-Attor-
ney George A. Bangs arrived
home this morning from Dickin-
son, where, on Wednesday after
noon, he appeared before Judge
Crawford of the district court in
the case of Charles Schafer VS..
the board of county commits
sioners of Mckenzie county. This
action is another of the long series
that has been pulled off in connec-
tion with the location of the coun-
ty seat.
The arguments Wednesday had
to do with the granting of per-
manent injunction against the
commissioners to restrain them
from carrying out a resolution
passed last January. By this res
olution it was provided that the
county officials should remover to
Alexander.
After hearing the arguments
Judge Crawford announced that
he was to take the matter under
advisement. Just when decision
will be forthcoming, is not known.
at this time.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
SENATORS CLASH
ON LUMBER RATE
McCUMBER'S AMENDMENT FOR FREE
PRODUCT WOULD PROTECT The
FORESTS.

Washington, May 22-At last
the lumber schedule was today
given its inning in the senate.
When finally the lumber para
graph was reached, McCumber
presented an amendment provid-
ing for free lumber instead of 50
per 1000 as in the Dingley law and
81 as provided by the house bill.
The action precipitated the long
threatened fight and it was evident
from the beginning that the
ground will be stubbornly contest
ed from beginning to end. By
an agreement reached yesterday,
there was no vote taken today, so
that from the beginning the field
was left entirely to the debators.
McCumber led the ball. He de-
clared that the lumber industry
needed no protection. There was,
he said, no danger that any of the
American lumber mills would be
closed because of foreign compe-
tition. The increasing demand
for forest products tend to keep
I'm tho nriceS
Borah opposed McCumber's
view that the tariff on lumber
would tend to deplete the forests.
1T is Incredible" he said, "that
the human race is going to perish
rather than plant trees on land of
no use except for planting of
trees"
McCumber insisted that the in
dustry of the United States had
reached it's height and urged that
free lumber would partly supply.
the American market with a prod
,uct that coald not be supplied
from American forests without ex-
hausting them.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
JACK JACKSON
IS TOO SLOW
NEGRO FAILS TO DO MUCH TO JACK
0'BRlEN IN A FAST SIX ROUND
BOUT.

Philadelphia, May 10. - Jack
Johnson, the big colored heavy
weight champion, failed to win
over Jack O'Brien, the Philadel-
phia light-heavy- weight tonight
in a six-round bout. The fight
was even and the consensus of
opinion was that it should have
been draw, had decision been
permissible. O'Brien's marvellous
fast foot work and his superior
block ing saved him from damage
in several close mixes, and three
times he was forced to his knees
by the great strength and weight
of johnson in the clinches.
It was fast fight, O'Brien do
ing the greater part of the lead
ing. johnson was slow on his
feet and appeared not to be in the
best of condition. Repeatedly the
champion rushed his smaller an
tagonist, but seldom landed effect
ively.. A right hand counter in
the fifth round cut O'Brien's right
eye and this was the sum total of
the damage done in the six rounds.
O'Brien was in and out like a
flash in nearly every round, stab
bing johnson on the face, but the
blows lacked force and had no ef-
feet other than to make the big
man grin and wave his hand at
the crowd. The spectators shout
ed wildly every time O'Brien land
ed and ,hooted johnson for his ap-
parent rough work in the clinches.
Referee McGuigan said after
the fight that O'Brien did remark
ably we'll under the circumstances.
He weighs 1929 pounds, while
Johnson's acknowledged weight
was POS and it was probably more.
johnson looked tired and anx-
ious in the fourth round and
O'Brien appeared confident
throughout the bout. He GER
tainly fought game fght,' said
McGuigan. johnson had moth
ing to say after the bout except
that he thought he had the better
of it. O'Brien was enthusiastic
over his showing. He said today
he accepted a proposal to meet Al
Kaufman in San Francisco in the
near future.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
WILLlSTON WINS
IN GREAT GAME
0RlOLESIDEFEA1ED RAY IN FAST GAME
ON RAY GROUNDS BY SCORE OF
SEVEN TO Two.

The famous Ray team, with
Rife in the box met with their
first defeat on their home grounds
in three years, and with Pat Car
ney at the indicator and the Grand
stand full of Ray rooters and ad-
mirers.
The Williston team went to Ray
with barely enough players and no
supporters to cheer or console
them. Happily no consolation
was needed except for the poor
broken-hearted bunch of Ray ma
tives and they got only the salts
faction that comes with the hope
that some day they may taste the
sweetness of a victory over their
old time friends from the banks of
the Missouri. Bill Grow was in
the bleachers stand but he came
late and missed a chance to UNI
pire. Before this game life was
sweet to Bill but now all is quiet
i kl
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
WlLLlSTON RACES
TO Be BEST EVER
ENTRIES FOR JUNE RACES PROMISE
BEST RACE MEET EVER HELD IN,
STATE-l5O HORSES.

The entries for the races to be
held on the Williston fair grounds
on June s, 9, 10, are coming in
every day and the class of horses
being entered tends to show that
this race meet will be the best
ever held in the state. The secre-
tary of the Racing Association
states that they have forty horses
here now and by the time the en-
tries are closed there will be $50.
Owing to the fact that no pool
selling is allowed in the east
horses are being shipped west and
we will have some fine eastern
horses at this meet. Two runners
are entered from New York and
several from other eastern states.
There are six from Oklahoma, six
fromM ontana and car load ex-
pected this week from Denver.
The race track is in perfect con-
dition and track men state that it
is beauty" The Racing asso-
citation is having fifty new stalls
built, giving them seventy-five in
all but they will need at least fifty
more. Glass entries close June
first. Entries for the two big
races, the 2:30 trot and the 2:15
pace or trot closed the fifteenth of
this month. Ten horses are en-
tered in the 2:3O and six in the
2:15 race.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
EIGHT PASSENGER
TRAINS DAILY
WILLISTON NOW HAS FOUR PASSENGER
TRAINS EACH WAY DAILY---EW
LOCAL WEST TO HAVRE.

The new train schedule on the
Great Northern went into effect
Sunday and Williston now has
eight passenger trains daily. But
few changes in the time have been
made. the greatest change being
in the time of number two which
arrives here at :05 instead of 5:25
P. M. Number one and two run
through from Chicago thus cut
ting out the necessity of any
change of cars at the Twin cities.
A new local has been put on
from here iwest as far as iavre
leaving here at 1880 A. NJ. and ar
irving from the west at 8:15 p. M.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27

Col. G. A. Lounsberry returned
from Buford Saturday. He states
that he has sixty acres in crop on
his grand daughters claim and
contracted for 100 acres of new
breaking. The irrigating ditch
runs directly through the claim
and every foot of it is irrigable.
The colonel intends to resign next
April and take charge of the
farm. He was called to the state
to testify in some land matters
and will spend a few days in Far
60 before returning to Washing
ton to resume his duties in the in
terror department. Fargo Forum.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
OPENS OFFICE
In WlLLIST0N
E. J. LANDER & COMPANY ESTABLISH
ANOTHER BRANCH OFFICE IN
9 NORTH DAKOTA

E. J. Lander & Company has
opened an office in Williston. The
company has two men on the
ground at the present time, j. Ar
thur Cunningham and A. G.. Nc
Intyre. The new Office will be in
charge of Mr.. Cunningham, who
has been connected with the Grand
Forks Office for a number of
years and who came here from
Jacksonville, III. Mr.. Mcintyre
is an old resident of Grand Forks
county.
The opening of the Office at
Williston leaves E. j. Lander &
Company represented as follows:
Offices at Grand Forks, Minneap-
oils, Rugby, Kenmare and Willis
ton and banks at Aneta, Neville
and Concrete. 49,. .
The company has been in bust
ness since 1883 and employees
more than 80 men the year round.
The business is constantly grow
ing. The large volume of busi-
ness in the western part of the
state and Montana made it neces-
sary to establish an Office in Will
liston.
Williston is to be congratulated
on the fact that this progressive
real estate firm is to be represent
ed there. Grand Forks Herald.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Decoration Day Program.

@ss ae Monday,M 81.
Patriotic Air. Williston Band
Prayer. F. S. Hollett
Song. Catch the Step as We Did in
Days Of Old..... Male Chorus
Address,. ........ Mayor John Bruegger
Song, "America". Audience
Address,. s....................Rev. Ellsworth
Chaplain lst. Reg. N. D. N. G.
Sole. Mrs. E. S. Grant
Patriotic Music. Concert Band
March to Cemetery,
Order of March:
Williston Concert Band,
Co. E. 1st. Reg. N. D. N. G.,
Old Soldiers,
Public School Children.
Williston Fire Department,
Uniformed Ranks of Secret Orders
~ General Parade.
Selection by Williston Concert Band
at Cemetery. =
Decorations of Graves by School
Children. .-.
Military Honors at Graves of Old
Soldiers.
Selection. Male Chorus
Star Spangled Banner. ...............B Band
Chairman. Capt. A. L. Knauf
Marshall of the Day.....W. c. Rawson
Exercises at the City lots, beginning
at 1890 A. M. ~.
All uniform ranks of secret or
ders are especially invited to at
tend and join in the parade, and
everybody is invited to attend and
assist in doing honor to the noble
dead.
We especially request that every
one assist the Civic League in
>Qathering floral decorations aad to
assist the school children in deco
rating the graves of the Soldiers
of the Civil war.
By the Committee.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Wl|lLLlSTON WAS
WELL REPRESENTED
at STATE DEFAMATION CONTEST
TRACK MEET AND PRINCIPALS
CONFERENCE.

The school was represented in
the defamation contest and field
meet at the University last Friday
and Saturday, and while no prizes
nor banners we're brought back by
our representatives, they all did
their parts we'll, representing the
schoolin a highly creditable man
ner. Cecil Mckay and Vera See
ley took part in the defamation
contest and Walker McGuiness en-
tered the fifty and hundred yard
dashes and the pole vault. Super
intendent Ellithorpe and Principal
McAndrew attended the principals
conference at the same place. In
the defamation contest our people
feel that they came very close to
winning. In athletic affairs our
school is handicapped by not hav-
ing training quarters when COM
peting with the highly trained STU
dents of the older sections of the
state. 81. ,l ....... .... ..-.
At the principals conference
matters were discussed pertaining
to plans for next years work.
Owing to the new demands made
upon our high schools for more in
dustrial work, such as commercial
manual training and agri-
culture, the high school course is
being greatly modified, and our
teachers feel better prepared to
meet these changes after confer
ring with other principals and su-
perintendants.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Weddings.

Judge Butler had double we'd
ding last week. sThe contracting
parties were Adolph Eggelson and
Hilda Paulson; Robert jacobson
and Anna Paulson, all Of Noonan.
O. P. Amundson and Sigrid
Chjemhus, both of Williston, were
married last Thursday evening at
the parsonage of Rev. Alb. johann
son.
Herman Grutman and Mrs.
Berdie Grutman. both of this city
were married by Judge Butler
Saturday.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27

MONEY-For Seed, Feed,
Horses or Machinery will be ad-
vanced to you at any time before
making proof, if you are going to
prove up soon, and make your
farm loan with me. Address AL
bert j. Stafne, Lawyer, U. S.
Commissioner, Williston, N. D.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
COMMENCEMENT
FRIDAY, JUNE 4
COMMENCEMENT EXERCISES WILL Be
HELD IN GATES OPERA HOUSE.
ELEVEN GRADUATES.

The Commencement exercises of
the Williston High school will be
held in the Gates opera house on
Friday evening, June 4th. A
class of eleven graduate this year,
and they are making preparations
for the occasion, decorating the
hall, etc. The program for the
evening follows: ~.
Music. Williston Orchestra
Invocation..........R Rev. W. K. Bloom
Statutory ........"..........Cecll Mckay
Glass Walker McGuiness
Our School. George Marelius
Merry June. e.......""..............G .Glee Club
A Plea for Domestic Science
......................".... Boyd
The Power of Music. ....Percy Irving
The Pioneers. rs.................Oscar Preble
Glimpse of the Future of Williston
...........................M Mae Anderson
Oh Italia, Italia.........Double Quartet
Glass Prophecy. Belyea
Glass Will. Elbridge Uhlman
Voices of the Woods. s..........Glee Club
Glass Poem. Gauthier
Valedictory. ......John Harris
Presentation of Diplomas by c. G.
Mackenroth, Pres. Board of Educa-
tion.
Music. lC........................... .....OrcneSGra
Benediction Rev. F. S. Hollett
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Lutheran Synod Church.

Services in the church at corner
of Bruegger park, next Sunday.
Pentecost sermon at II a. M, and
Memorial services in the evening
at 8 o'clock, with special music.
Sunday school at 10 o'clock every
Sunday. M. L. Holey, pastor.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27


S. H. Saykally, the St. Louis
Candy Kitchen confection man,
has this week moved into his hand
some new home on the corner of
Main and First streets, and will
have open house to his friends
and patrons on Saturday, May 20.
Prof. Onstad and his orchestra
have been engaged to furnish mu-
sic for the occasion and visitors to
the new store on that day will be
presented with beautiful carna-
tion, free. Don't forget the date,
Saturday, May 29th.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27
Cigar Smokers.

We have just installed a Hygro
Electric cigar moistener which
acts automatically, insuring you a
perfectly kept cigar at all times.
Try one and note the difference.
AZ Williston Drug Co.
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27

Get your Bulbs and Roots for
the following at E. S. Grant & Co:
Dahlias, Poeonys, Gladiolas, Ger
aniums, etc. These are all healthy
sprouted bulbs, and will bloom
year after year. As
Williston graphic. (Williston, Williams County, N.D.) 1895-1919, 1909-05-27

Ebonite Antitrust cement paint
is always ready for application,
requiring no mixing, no thinning
and does not settle as do ordinary
paints. For sale by Stenehjem &
Husebye. AZ ,