davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.

IFrom the Philadelphia Record.1
Many are called, but few win the
jackpot.
A run of luck requires considerable
sprinting.
Some pictures and some men are
not worth a rope to hang them.
Money talks, but poverty doesn't
have to announce its presence.
Many a man would rather be a
cheerful idiot than a gloomy sage.
If you are going to make bet don't
get a butcher to hold the stakes.
The man who comes straight home
from the Office is the one who comes
home straight.
No, Maude, dear, the art of writing
love letters isn't taught in the cor
respondence schools
man generally makes a fool of
himself over a woman either before
he is 25 or after he is 65.
Blobbs-"A scientist has claimed to
discover that year on Mars is equal
to two of our years" Slobbs-'What
q cinch for the Marian women. They
don't have to lie about their ages"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
AYHAWKER JOTy

style" says the Jewell county Re-
publican, us the art of looking ridi-
culous when everybody else does"
Charlie Blakesley wants to know
what the Hon. Web Foote of Garden
City thinks Of the increased tariff on
stockings.
The town slogan habit seems to be
catching. A Mcpherson paper offers
prize Of SIS in gold for the best slo-
gan for the town.
The Parsons Sun wants to know if
it isn't about time for some enterpris-
ing theatrical manager to bring out a
dramatization of the kidnapping of
Willie Whitla.
The Gaylord Sentinel reports that a
couple of that town was so spoony
that it wasn't satisfied in holding
hands on the church steps, so they
broke into the basement and carried
off package of church spoons.
Arthur F. Riddle remarks in the
Minneapolis Messenger that in the
Methodist church of each town the
question of moment is who's the new
preacher" The rest of the town is
eager to know about the new pitcher.
Trouble, trouble everywhere, and no
rest from it. Just as everybody was
beginning to have self congratulations
on the fact that the spring campaign
would be over soon, the dandelions
begin to show up.-Lawrence Gazette.
After months of thinking. says the
Hutchinson News, Ralph Faxon has
found it and here it is. set right out
for everybody to read in his Garden
City Telegram: One very good thing
about the election of J. L. Bristow as
senator is the fact that people will
stop calling him General"
One of the students in the Manhat-
tan Mercury's correspondence school
of Journalism wants to know when to
make it society item and when it is
merely personal" Here is the ans
wer: When anyone arrives or leaves on
a Pullman it is a society item; when
he travels in a day coach it is merely
a personal.
The Ananias at Salina who keeps
the morning papers loaded with heart
rending stories of happenings at that
place, has reached the limit at last.
with a yarn about a trained rabbit
that chases the dogs there. The Con-
sentative Citizens of the town should
hasten to put the lid on the young
man.-Emporia Gazette.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
HUNOR or THE DAY

Used not to interfere with her religion.
ba a aor Fow ne To Iay Ree
ord.
That young fellow AIM, int, long for ,o this
healthy enough" "He is. But he wants
to play the bad man, and nature never in
tended him for the rt."-Louisville Cou-
rier-Journal
II suppose your constituents ask you q
great many questionsY NO.. answered
speech. and then they are afraid to ask
Your Honor" said the convicted beg
gar. "ean't you change g, my sentence e., Ct +
n mone !nf to pag replied the he con
Ssx mad e GSua beg se Ds
Onicer-Hi. youi That cars smoking. It
the most unexpected places, also turn flip
an oPs wing an ffeH not only smeSes 0Sef
sometimes / suspect 1t of drinking. Pos
S park ye Ther e nothing in GODS world Int it
can't do!-Judge.
Barber (rather SlOw)-Beg pardon, sir,
but your hair is turning bit gray. Vic
tim-Shouldn't wonder. Look at the time
I've been here.-Chicago Daily News.
1--WE have queer ideas of values" says
the Philosopher OF Folly. II know a man
who will sell his vote for $1.50. But he has
a yaller dog that no money could buy
Cleveland Leader.
Mamma, may 1 play with Johnnie
Gross? 2" mo, George. He's bad boy. Let
him play with the other bad boys
Well that's all right. mamma. His
mother saws I'm the worst boy on the
street ''-Cleve1and Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
JOURNAL ENTRIES

All the donkeys in the world are not
provided with four legs.
y X
The pretty girl who is not aware Of
her good looks is considerable of a
myth.
A man with past may be interest
ing but the chap with a future has
him beaten several blocks.
Il y
June may be the ideal month to get
married in but June brides take as
many chances as any of the others.
y Il
A fellow can generally break girl
of the desire to be sister to him by
giving her little real brotherly ad-
vice.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe.1

from the ACcn1SOn GlODe.I
1t is said that no one on earth can
after she has become convinced that
men are not worth having.
mo risk. no gain" may be true in
certain instances, but it's indiscrimi-
nate application furnishes motive and
excuse for lot of fool losses.
If man has his own way after he
is married, then his wife never has
hers. When the two agree it means
that one gives in to the other.
y man is always proud of his chill
dren who are large for their age, ex-
cept when he is trying to pass them
on half fare tickets on the cars.
If you want to work any woman,
and nearly any man, send around a
smooth man to say he is calling on
only a few of the most cultured peo-
pie.
The people who marry for money
don't seen. to get what they married
for, neither 10 those who marry for
love.
If the admiring friends soliciting
funds for a gift for man don't raise
enough the first day to buy him a gold
watch, the evening OF the second day
they will take what they have raised
and buy him penholder.
1t is curious that people persist in
interesting themselves in other peo-
pies business. for which they receive
no thanks, when they can earn money
by attending to their own business.
An Atchisor. woman told a friend a
secret and instead of saying: Don't
breathe this to a SOUL" she said, Don't
tell any more people than you can pos
sibly help"
Club for the husbands to use when
asked to button their wives waists
in the back: The perfectly formed wo-
man can reach every button herself.
There is some hope for the boy who
has to be driven into the bathtub, but
there is mighty little hope for the boy
who has to be driven away from the
mirror.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Treasury officials are planning to
change the design of national bank
notes to make them uniform. The
average individual cares little about
the design of a bank note. It's the
size and possession of them that he is
interested in
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
IFrom the New York Press

Many promises are made. OCCASION
ally one is kept.
A lot of women seem to think it is
better to be tight-laced than straight
laced.
People seem to be able to make
good at being bad easier than at any
thing else.
girl can pretend to like to go
walking with man so as to pretend
her shoes don't hurt her.
The reason woman is so much
smarter in dealing with a man than
he is in dealing with her Is that he
takes 1t for granted he is.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

A reasonable supposition is that
Colonel Hoffman, in command of Ok
iahoma's army at the front. will pass
the entire summer in the field He
has been ordered by Governor Haskell
to keep after Crazy Snake until this
awful redskin is captured.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Just because Minnesota college
professor insists that cold storage eggs
are the best, that won't be conceded by
the multitudes who have had few
experiences with them which have been
anything but pleasant to those who are
blessed with a sense of smell
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Great Britain assuredly has her
troubles in maintaining her alleged
supremacy in military affairs. 1t
seems now that while she has been
working overtime to keep her navy
the most powerful one afloat. she has
fallen behind in the race for COM
mand of the air. But she need not
worry herself sick over this for the
time when battles will be fought in
the air is ~ q considerable distance
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Governor Haskell's position in his
libel suit against Editor Hearst will
not be strengthened much in the
popular mind by the theft from Mr..
Hearst's attorneys of two suit cases
filled with evidence which they had
prepared for use in the case regardless
of the effect this action may have on
fha trial
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

While this country is being flooded
with immigrants from abroad it is in
teresting, if not encouraging, to know
that 4,7O0 citizens of the United States
emigrated into Canada last month via
iNNinnarno
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Georgia has taken a good step for
ward. The inhuman convict lease sys-
TEN has been abolished there. Here
after the convicts in that common
wealth will be given employment in
building good roads and on other public
HNnrlrs
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Among the prominent heroines of
Chicago at the time being is a young
woman whose skill at iiu jitsu en-
abled her to overcome a robber. All
the girls in the country will probably
take UP the study of this Japanese art
of self-defense, for a week or so.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

John Burroughs, the noted natural
ist, declared that it has not been
proved to his satisfaction that the
toad which died in the New York
geological garden a few days ago was
more than thousand years old. How
cruel of Mr.. Burroughs to shatter
such a magnificent Illusion?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is a member of the
Associated Press ard receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news or
ganization for the exclusive afternoon
pub1ica ton in Topeka
The news is received in The State Jour-
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
pose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

The Shawnee county commissioners
are considering the advisability of re-
placing some of the steel bridges in
the county with structures of the con-
crete sort. This is an excellent
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

And now it seems that President
Taft and Mr.. E. H. Hartman are not
agreed on one subject, at least The
railroad magnate recently said that it
was none Of the public's business as
to how much stocks and bonds shall
be issued by railroad companies. Re-
ports from Washington have it that
President Taft will soon ask congress
to pass laws giving the government
power to supervise and restrict the
issues of railroad securities
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Ex-Governor Folk, of Missouri, has
never been noted for causing trouble
or disturbing the peace. yet he is out
with an opinion that the United States
will some day annex Mexico.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

Jane Adams. the prominent
socioIogist of Chicago. expresses the
opinion that the stage is the most
successful popular teacher of morals.
1t certainly would be If most of the
plays which present immoral senti-
ments condemned them instead of
rather condoning them. There are
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

The latest despoiler of ancient his
torical beliefs is DR.. Paul Haupt, of
Dohns Hopkins university. He declares
that Jesus Christ was not a Jew but a
Galilean and that he was born In
Nazareth and not in Bethlehem. All Of
which may be true but the important
thing is that Jesus Christ was Jesus
Christ
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

This must be mistake. A report
comes from Gibraltar that Mr.. Roose-
welt refused to be photographed dur
Ing his stop at that place.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

many plays, though, as Miss Adams
says, which work nightly for the
moral uDlift
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
PROTECTING THE BIRDS.

CndmplOneQ by an eX-dIIOrney gen.
eral of the state, the mi1liners of New
York are making a vigorous fight in
the legislature against bill to prevent
the sale or possession of the plum
mage of wild birds. The milliners have
a good cause, too, for If the bill
should pass. they could no longer
stick a two-bit bunch of feathers on
a So hat and charge $40 for the "crea-
ton"
However, the bill will have the
support not only of the bird lovers,
but of the unitarian farmers as well,
sense and natural horror of cruelty
of fashion. The only fault of the bill
is that it does not go far enough. Why
should not the same protection be ex-
tended to the sparrow, the crow, the
goshawk, the owl, and the kingfisher
that is given to the songbirds? De-
stroy the smaller birds of prey and
in little while every field and gar
den will be overrun with worms, bugs
and mice. Last year they had a reg
ular mouse plague in Nevada. solely
because the ranchmen had thorough
ly shot the hawks and owls out of ex-
istence. The crows can work havoc in
a cornfield, but the field mice they
eat would destroy o times as much.
The sparrows are natural robbers, but
they are worth their weight in gold
as insect catchers. The farmer who
loses a chicken or two to the hawks
or a few cherries to the robins has
paid just toll to some of the most
deserving of his he1pers.-Washingto
Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
FROM OTHER PENS
SIMPLIFYING GOVERNMENT

With President Taft and his cabi-
net and a special commission desig-
mated by congress to investigate gov
eminent methods and expenditures,
with a view to increased economy in
the administration of affairs some
thing practical ought to be accom-
plished within four years and a great
saving result without loss of eff
cheney.
1t is not a new discovery that there
is unnecessary and wasteful outlay of
money and labor in carrying on the
work of the government Every in
telligent business man who comes
from private life into a government
office at Washington speedily becomes
aware of this. He finds in existence
Anticipated methods of transacting
public business: he finds a lack of
system, an overlapping Of work.
want of efficiency. a superfluity of
employees, disposition to achieve the
smallest results in the longest posi-
BILE time instead of the reverse; in
short. a slipshod and extravagant
method of procedure.
Commonly, however, the heads of
bureaus and departments can accom-
plish little in this direction They see
the cumbersome machinery of their
offices and the general lack of system,
but alone they cannot bring about a
reform Cooperation and authority are
necessary, their own terms are limit
ed and they end by adjusting them
selves to the methods in vogue. With
the executive and legislative branches
Of the government uniting to system
atize the conduct of business and to
reduce expenses something worth
while may be accomplished, however,
and if this work shall be done under
President Taft's direction 1T will be
one of the most important achieve
ments of his administrauion.-Ind
apolis Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07
Legacies to Royalties.
Educated Horse Retires on Pension

Having served his master faithfully
for twelve years, Tom horse belong
ing to Samuel Goodman. a Republi-
can leader in Bayonne, has been pen
stoned Sunday the horse was sent to
North Branch where he will have
nothing to do The animal knew the
way to and from the several freight
stations in Bayonne. and all that was
necessary was to call out the name
of the station and Tom would take
the wagon there without being guided.
New York Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-04-07

eve have queer ideas of values" says
the Philosopher of Folly II know a man
who will sell his vote for $50. But he has
a yalier dog that no money could buy
Cleveland Leader.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01

Miss Grace McAllister Of Washington
visited last week at Fred Poor's.
Mrs. Josie Grearson visited Mrs. Clars
Hunter in Mortified last week.
The Chelsea dramatic club came here
MONDAY night and played down East''
to full house.
Workmen are busy papering and get
ting the hotel in shape again so it can be
opened for business.
Herbert Farnham left Friday to spend
ten days in Washington, u. c. Mrs.
Farnham is visiting in Jonesville.
About thirty Odd Fellows from Barre
visited the lodge here Friday night and
worked the first degree on two capdi-
dates.
The widow of John Bacon died in Barre
last Saturday and the body was brought
here Monday and buried in the village
cemetery. She left two children, Frank
Bacon and Mrs. win Fogg, both Of this
town.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01
sHoAp BROOK

Ray Spencer is working for Arthur
Case in No. 8.
will W. Allen left Friday for Newport
to visit relatives.
Joseph Rosseau returned home Friday
from New York city, where he has spent
the winter.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ross Coon OF Burlington
spent last week with her mother, Mrs.
Fred Freeman.
Doris Lovejoy was at South RoyaIton
the last OF the week to visit her grand
mother and aunt.
Mr.. and Mrs. Albert Taylor of Royal
ton Center were here Saturday to visit
Mrs. Arthur Davis.
Mr.. and Mrs. Levi Stevens and daugh-
ter Bessie, were at Tunbridge recently to
attend the Pomona grange.
Mrs. Mark Loveioy was called to Bel
lows Falls Thursday by the serious illness
Of her father, who has pneumonia.
Fred Rowland, Fred Allen, Mrs. N. d.
Rowland, Mrs. w. Lyman Allen and
Miss Bessie Stevens were at East Barnard
Saturday to attend the funeral OF Mrs.
Calista Miller.
Mrs. II. g. Whitney was called to
South Royalton last week to care for her
mother, Mrs. M. A. Cox, who slipped on
the stairs and bruised herself severely,
but no bones were broken. She is as
comfortable as can be expected.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01
EAST BARNARD

Adelbert Campbell OF Tunbridge visited
relatives here Sunday.
Edward Hope OF South Royalton was
IN this place Saturday.
Sam Mcclellan is stopping a few DAYS
with his uncle, Herman Allen.
Miss Sadie Kent, the nurse who carad
for Mrs Miller, returned to her home If
Randolph Saturday.
Mrs Herman Allen is i'll with pnep-
monia. She has a nurse, Miss SAINT
from Randolph to care for her.
Mrs. E. s. Bradley returned sstprsav
from Winthrop, Mass, where she had
spent few weeks with her mother. who
is ill.
Edwin Moore has rented his farm nm
Allen Hill to George Wetmore OF Worcss-
ter, Mass, who takes possession pext
week.
Mrs. Ellen Cole and Miss Jessie Ran
son of South Royalton were here satnr-
day to attend the funeral of Mrs. CaIists
A. Miller. -'9'"
Mr.. and Mrs. Alison Ralph. who vere
called here by the death of Mrs. MiIIer
returned Monday to their home at somer'
vile, Mass.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01
TuNsRIpcE

Halsey Durkee is spending his vacation
at home.
Norman Clark is at home for visit Of
few weeks.
Miss HARRIET Wood was at BENZ. Tuck
er's last week.
There is to be an auction soon at Fred
Hathorn's place.
Will Noble has purchased water
wheel for his mill.
Miss Flora Morrill, returned to RAN
dolph Center Sunday.
Charles Clark OF Massachusetts, visited
his brother here last week.
Miss Roberts OF East Mortified is a
guest at Rev. James Berry's.
Miss Flossie Fee Of Royalton is visiting
Mr.. and Mrs. Frank Jones.
Dorothy Pierce spent last week at her
grandfather's, J. B. Sargent.
Andrew Ordwsy was given a surprise
Thursday night by some Of his friends.
Ernest Blake has been suffering for
several weeks with neuralgia in his face
Gus Warren has bought and is to move
onto the Swan place at North Tunbridge.
NAA' oAa MIS- nhLclAQu u CLrAuOFQ
we're guests at Chandler brothers last
week.
Josiah Slack OF Austin, Mont. who has
been visiting relatives here, started for
home Monday.
James Farnham has moved here from
New York onto the Drew place, which he
bought last fall.
The season for entertainments closed
Friday evening with the Old Folks con-
cert, which was grand success.
A Pomona grange was organized here
last week with Jos charter members from
Chelsea, South Royalton, East Barnard,
Sharon, STAFFORD and Tunbridge oranges.
and called Justin S. Morrill, grange. The
following officers were elected: = Master.
Arthur @. Folsom; overseer, J. r. Hayes;
steward. W. y. Scribner; lecturer, Mrs.
M. Z. Strachsn; asst. steward, Ernest
Howe; Chap, w. A. Farnham; Treas,
John NJ. Bicknell; Sec, Miss Eva strach-
an; gatekeeper, Fred Haynes; Ceres, Mrs.
A. G. Folsom; Pomona, Mrs. Julia Blk
by; Flora, Mrs. W. F. Scribner; lady
asst. steward, Miss Nina Cox.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01
NORTH ruNRRIneE

Ernest Blake has purchased the farm
formerly owned by Warner Porter.
Mrs. w. w. Swan has recently sold her
residence here to Mr.. and Mrs. Augustus
Warren.
DR.. E. II. Stearns, veterinary surgeon
OF Randolph, was called here by NJ. v.
b. Noyes last week to treat COW. The
treatment proved successful.
Mr.. Clarke of Massachusetts,, a brother
OF Fred Clark, is here negotiating the sale
OF the two farms formerly owned bv
Warner Porter and George Swan.
Evangie Bearor, who it was erroneous
ly reported in last weeks issue had gone
to the home OF Perley Belknap in South
Royalton, is at work now in the family of
Arthur Folsom in Tunbridge.
The Masonic funeral of Clinton L. Buz-
zell was held in the Baptist church Mon
day afternoon OF last week. There was
q large attendance of Masons and MEM
bers OF the Grange and community where
he was well known. The burial service
was conducted by II. r. Bryant. master
OF George Washington lodge in Chelsea.
OF which deceased was a member.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1909-04-01
srockRRIpoE

Mrs. Julius Blackmer was quite in last
week.
Mr.. and Mrs. Fred Packard spent Sum
day in South Stock bridge.
Miss Gladys Shaughnessy was in Pitts
held several days last week
Mr.. and Mrs. John Sawyer have been
visiting in Rutland recently.
Mr.. and Mrs. William Chaffee Of Rocb-
ester were in town Saturday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ed. Patno have been
spending several days in Bristol.
There will be box social at W. A.
Usher's Friday evening of this week.
Roy Mills of GaysvilIe visited Mr.. and
Mrs. Carl Nef Saturday and Sunday.
Miss Bertha Shattuck OF Bethel ,Lvn-
pus is working for Mrs. Maurice Luce.
Hamlin Barnes and family OF Bethel
were guests at Joel Blackmer's last week.
Miss Helen Usher is spending ten days
with her parents, Mr.. and Mrs. w. A.
Usher.
Mrs. Thayer OF PittsheId is to teach the
school at Stockbridge Common this
spring.
Mrs. Esther Burnham OF Gaysville
spent last week with her sister, Mrs. Z.
j. Bent.
Mr.. and Mrs. Romaine Holland Of
Rochester spent Sunday at Harris Hol- |
lands.
Miss Bernice Putnam is at Randolph
Center with her sister, Ruth, until
Easter.