The Evening statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash.) 1903-1910, 1909-01-05
gree or degree of Humble PRIDE

gree or degree of Humble PRIDE
people may talk, Leo; but when
female woman makes up her mind to
a thing. especially when she has had
three or four days to think 1t over,
there is bound to be something do
ing; hardly had the flat-iron and the
skillet found resting place on the
floor than the old girl opened up dis
course on the faithlessness of mankind,
the like of which I never heard before,
| nor hope to hear again. The way she
emphasized her strong points, and her
manner of conviction were worthy
Of a better cause but l had not the
| heart to interrupt. For what seemed
! an hour the flow Of words equalling
the efforts of the silver-tongued ora
tor came in voluptuous volumes, while
1 listened, enraptured.
"The second degree, Leo, or the de-
gree Of Repentance, opened most
auspiciousy-for the degree team
and soon after said opening I was
literally taken off my feet with the i'm
/ pact of a chunk of stove wood that
came in contact with my anatomy
somewhere between the pugilistic
| belt-line and my shoulders; second
earthquake was recorded by the
| siesmograph when a dish pan caroomed
| for moment in the fair ones hand
and then shot out. straight as die, to
| where / stood rooted to the spot.
With a bang that sent the old cat into
winter quarters and caused the roOst-
err in the back yard to take notice,
the dish receptacle collided with the
upper portion of my think tank, dis
| lodging fair sized bunch of my rap
idly-graying locks and forcing me to
| consider the plan of retreat. The de-
gree closed with a generous quantity
| Of household furnishings of varied de-
signs, an coming my way.
I'm the last round, kidlet, was where
I was rudely awakened; after having
relieved herself of the pent-up emo
| tions that had been slumbering be-
meath the calm outward appearance,
wiley began to sniffle-just a little at
first the sounds growing ever and
! anon more audible. l dared not look
| in the direction, fearing a revival of
! hostilities, but on hearing a big tear
drop hit the floor with a soft, squashy
| squash, did venture to take a peek.
| Seated on a dry goods box in the
corner with her face buried in her
| apron, was the frantic dame of a few
seconds before. A stream of water
| was trickling in a most enhancing
| manner from the end of her red little
nose, and the convulSive sobs that now
and then shooq her brawny shoulders
led me to believe-oh, happy day
that the third degree, or degree of
! forgiveness was about to close.
"Say what you please, kidlet wo-
man is a sure strange work of art,
and until the end of time man will not
get wise enough in his egotism to I'M
! derstand her moods and wiles 1 just
naturally rushed up to her, placed my
arms tenderly around her, and was
| again the subject of rude awaken
| ing. Biff! with a jolt in the Stats
| that would have been more artistic
| from pugilist's viewpoint than from
the one possessed by me. I was rele-
| gated to a seat in the corner Don't
you dare tech muh," she exclaimed,
and l readily acquiesced But after I
|
my bones ached, the sobs discontinued,
and by stealing quick, furtive glances
| in the direction of the box, l was able
| to perceive that grille was laughing
| at my solemn and woe-begone ap-
! pearanCe
Il took the cue, Leo; that the pro-
per place to do it, and within the
course Of half an hour had, by slow
and careful manipulations, edged my
| way over to where she was seated.
Another burst of tears followed, and
wiley actually asked my forgiveness,
which was readily granted; but 1 had
the satisfaction of seeing her believe
she was the erring one, and when 1
| left this morning she was as meek
and penitent, as loving and as atten-
tive as one could have wished
| But l paid dearly for it; that knot
on my noble brow still clings like a
| pleasant memory to remind me Of the
! New Years festivities that led me so
far astray but 1 feel that it has not
all been in vain. However, in the flu
ture. youngster, I'm going to induce
| Wlfelet to take vacation with paw
and nav before celebrating in that
| style again. I've not got the courage
to face another ordeal like that again;
not on your GagurreOtyDe"