Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-12-03
0---~-~~~~~O~-


ing?" Janitor-Yes. third floor. but
his names Herring
Il am looking for husband" How
would l do?' But you are married?'
IAN husbands are"-Houston Post
First NewpOrter-was it an inform
al dinner? Second Newporter-Very.
The flowers only cost S2,5OO.-Puck.
Since Maud's engagement how
bright and happy she iootts." Yes;
a match lights up a girls face" -Life.
Mrs. Cheatham-I believe shall
have to give up bridge. Miss Frank
Really? Wasn't the game worth the
scandal?-Puek.
Nature plans well for mankind's
needs" Il should say SO. What could
be more convenient than ears to hook
spectacles over?'
Old Lady Tin shoe shop)-Have
you felt slippers? Small Boy Assist
ant (solemnly)-Yes.m a'am; many
time!-Comic Cuts.
Was 1t your wife who called you up
this morning?" No; that was aunt
1t was my wife VINO called me down"
Baltimore American.
Solemn Man-Do you hear the clock
slowly ticking? Don't you know what
day it is ever bringing nearer? Cheer
full Man-Yes. payday
Professor come TO see your col
lection of curfos. decentralization.
IL introduce, first of ali. my wife and
daughter -Megendorfer Blaetter
Opportunity calls 5nst as often as
In years gone by" But with us, all
huddled up in hats. opportunity Is
liable to whistle up the wrong tube"
Minister-And The child's name.
madam? Mother (ftrmIy) Name him
Frederick Robert Cook Peary Smith.
I'm not going 90 take any chances
Puck.
Barber ito customer. whom he's cut
up)--Would you mind going out the
back way? so many people might see
you in the main strsst Meggendorfer
Batter.
Suitor ton Blended knee) See In
me, my love, your most humble and
devoted servant Shelf this is your
first place, IN engage yon for life
Lustige Batter,
Arctic Explorer DuEdng our whole
two years in the polar region we
couldn't wash ourselves once. Enfant
Terrible Mamma, can't we move
there9--Lustige Wela.
VIII that young man ever go
homer" demanded the arritated head
OF the house u guess so. father" re-
piled the mater Eanaslias. He always
has. w Washington Herald.
Professors wife GeS cook My hus-
band has received "A cali 10 Heidelberg.
VIII you go with usg Cook feel
highly honored. madam. but l cannot
accept the calf.--Lastige Welt.
Poet-When finished that poem
was completely exhausted. Editor
can sympathize with you. old man.
was In the same condition when /
finished reading philadelphia Rec
ord.
He (nervously) -ET Margaret
er-er~there's something has been
trembling on my lips for the last two
months. She Yes. 80 / sec. Why
don't You shave u off7-Princeton
Tiger.
You women never keep posted on
Il.
I've been reading all about the finding
of the pole But. John7" Well,
what?" How ala the pole happen to
be lost Public Ledger.
Say, Casey, it's haired wurrker ye
are How many heas NV mortar hev
ye carried up that ladder today"
Casey Hush, man Pm fooling the
boss I've carried tho same hod up
and down all day. and ne thinks I'm
wurkin,"
Senior Partner Keep II sharp eye
on Holdfast I'm afraid he's robbing
the firm. Junior Pasaner-Eh? Is he
living extravagautIyE Senior Partner
Well, | passed him ga the street yes
terday. and he was smoking cigar
that didn't smell nj sQ bad.-Tit-Bits.
Il must warn you, dearest" he said.
that after we ara married you Will
very likely find me inclined to be ar
bitrary and dlctatorsai in my man
ner." mo matter" she replied. cheer
fully, II won't pay the slightest at
tention to what yon sag" -Presbyte-
rian Standard.
Has that feller PFnkisy returned
home YETI" Nope. He's been gone
two years now, and nobody knows a
blessed thing about htzn' well,
derned II / shouldn't think you'd be
afraid he'd come home some day and
claim he found tbe South Pole
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
One of the witiest OF Parisians. in
friends box at the opera, was listen
ing to That's" or rather trying to do
e.. hfa hr1fon. 81 A,.o,.o -