davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR

From the New York Press.
 A wife craves romance; husband com fort.
 The devil keeps his telephone open all the time for village gossip.
 What a man hates is not being wrong in an argument but having to admit 1t. The Lord gave few women intellect so that man could have slight chance against them.
 A womans look. of agony at wedding is almost as convincing as her expression of joy at lecture on foreign missions.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
Hudson-Fulton Celebration.

"The Hudson-Fulton celebration will draw an enormous crowd from all parts of the country" said railroad man yes terday, and Alabama is sending big delegation.
 .'The reduced rates have attracted many Birmingham people who went up yester- day and will leave today and tomorrow. The regatta and entertainment to be found in and around New York makes it one of the finest trips the railroads can offer.
 T understand that 1t is now practically impossible to find hotel room in New York, a condition which has rarely ever occurred before. Persons leaving here were forced to trust to luck, hoping that they would find some private apart ment''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
Remarks Great Improvement.

James S. Easby Smith, wel-Kho"h young attorney of Washington, D. o'' spent yesterday in Birmingham. He IS a na+,ve of Tuscaloosa and was in his old home for short visit.
 q am glad to see Birmingham making big strides" said MT Easby-Smith lt has been several years since l was last here and the building improvements seen on all sides make a fine impression. But Alabama is being rldiculed and IS caus- ing surprise throughout the country on account of it's drastic prohibition laws T take if for granted that there will be some modification of the laws before great while"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

of a stirring campaign for which he was afterward sorry. But when a minister becomes known by his acts as political pulpiteer his influence is weakened if it indeed is not en- tirely gone
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

Maine and Ohio as constitutional prohibition states are failures. Turkey is the one place where prohibition actually and absolutely prohibits and since it has proved a success for cen turies-the only we'll known country in the world where it has worked the new reform party over there might. without any great risk, venture to put prohibition in the Sultan's con stitution
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
problbitjonista Meet.

Huntsville. September 24.-(SpeciaL)-- The prohibitionists of the New Market neighborhood held a rally in the scnooi house yesterday afternoon and heard ad- dresses delivered by the Rev. S. E. was son of this city and Representative A D. Kirby. Nearly all the county candidates attended the affair to mingie with the voters
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
Railway-carmen Adiourn.

Atlanta, September 24.-After the install lation of the newly elected officers the eleventh convention of the National Brotherhood of Railway Carmen. which has been in session here for 10 days ad- journed tonight The next place of meet ing will be announced by the executive committee later.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
PRUDENT MAN

Here is an interesting article on near suffragette'
 "The first time I see a suffragette near me I'm going to light out"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

Judge Wealley. an announced can didate for governor on the amend ment platform, seeing in Emmet ONeal a prospective candidate for governor on some other sort of a plat form, consumed much time at Shef- field Thursday in attacking the lat ter's record And yet they say there is no politics in it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

Walter Wellman might yet make solid reputation by going to the pole and discovering that little brass tube which Cook planted there. It is floating around in the ice some where up north.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
Eioht Hurt in Wreck.

Boone, Ia, September 24.-Eght per sons were hurt none fatally, when two interurban cars on the Fort Dodge, Des Moines and Southern crashed together kead-on mar here today
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

France has three battleships named Truth. Justice and Liberty. She ought to have three more named Faith, Hope and Charity, although such names are trifle tame for fighting craft.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

There is a temporary Hull in the Cook Peary discussion and the ques- tion in Hudson celebration circles is whether it was John Fitch or Robert Fulton that beat to the steamboat
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The TuscumDia Alabamian-Dispa points with pride to the fact that Hon. s. D. Weakley gave $750 to the trus- tees of the Anti-Saloon league. And the Hon. s. D. Is running for gov ernor to beat the band.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

A Philadelphia paper wants 10 know what has become of the Jer- sey Lily. She's dabbling in literature in a mild sort of way.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

It has been predicted that a wom- an will be president of this country inside of 25 years. Let us hope not, for her sake
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

President Taft Is paying the penalty of greatness by being walked up at any old hour to make a speech.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The people will soon cry, Gut it short,' if joint debates are as long drawn out as the great Sheffield meet.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

Every now and then some fellow sits down and sees how long he can pound a piano. He ought to be given a job working off his surplus energy hv Dounding rock.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The great mass meeting, the State Fair. the good roads convention and Barnum & Bailey's circus will all bring big crowds to Birmingham.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

It is universally agreed that John A. Johnson was man worth emulat- ing.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The best way to purify the morals of the people is not by adopting New England's cast off laws. The old moral suasion plan may not accomplish all that good folks desire but it will, per haps, be the most effective means this side of the millennium.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

Christmas is only three months off and Santa Claus will soon be laying in his stocks.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The moving pictures are showing what happened to President Taft Tn Chicago. The biggest number on the programme was a ball game.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

No matter how many hippos Bwana Tumbo kills in Africa there always seems to be one more.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

An aeroplanist is always looking for trouble, but he hopes he won't find it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
ADRlFT WITH THE TIMES
MOMENToUs NEWS.

The feminine waist line Is to be restored.-
 Fashion note. What If the swift-heeled Mauritania Is smashing records across the sea? What if the north poles been discovered? :? That is of small import to me Let the highbrows and savants wrangle Over learning's cryptic hoard, Here is good news the wires are flashing The feminine waist line is to be restored What if the bold manbird is flying. Clipping the clouds with airy wings? What if the world Is moving forward Ever improving countless things? What if the learned men are thinking Deeper than knowledge has ever bored Here is some news that demands atten- tion-
 The feminine waist line is to be re- stored. What do we care for airship navies? What do we care for the frozen pole? Religions new and smart inventions. The psychic world and the cult of soul? The Mary Jane" is a fierce contrivance Tn which no maid could be adored So let LIS rafoice at this glad pronounce ment--
 The feminine waist line is to be restored.
 BENvOY. Prince. what do we care for the march of science.
 The submarine or the men who've scared? Here Is matter of real importance The feminine waist line is to be re- stored!
 QUITE A BLOW T understand you had quite a blow coming across from Cherbourg" 'Yes, we did. There was a man from Omaha on board. You know the kind of men Omaha sends abroad.
 JUMPING AT A CONCLUSION. I'm taking the rest cure now. 'When will your wife be back?" AN INVITATION TO SORROW. ''Who was 1t wrote, Man was made to mourn ?" asked the man whenever reads anything but the dope sheet "Blest If I know" answered the man who knows everybodys batting average. ''1 guess 1t must have been a chap who always finished last"
 FORBEARANCE. He 1onged for popularity And this is how he got it: No matter where a fault might be, He didn't try to spot it.
 LIVING IN HOPE Deacon Bittercup must get a lot of consolation out of singing about the heavenly mansion he's going to occupy in the sweet by and by" What makes you think so?'' Hes six months behind with the rent for his earthly abode"
 so SAD.
 As if their hearts
 Were out an ember
 The poets war
 Ble of September
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
SHE'D BE A BUTTERFLY.

Oh, how I wish the scrap would stop! Why can't somebody call a cop?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

The gulf storm followed close on the north pole controversy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25
S'MORE POLE.

Oh, what tangled ball they roll . When men go forth to find the pole.
 New York Mall. It is tangled ball they do When they go first and second. too.
 Houston Post.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

JUMPING AT A CONCLUSION. I'm taking the rest cure now. 'When will your wife be back?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

T understand you had quite a blow coming across from Cherbourg"
 Yes, we did. There was a man from Omaha on board. You know the kind of men Omaha sends abroad
The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-25

so SAD. As if their hearts Were out an ember, The poets war Ble of September.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09
Color ada, Utah, Yellowstone and the
Pacific Coast.

Special low round trip rates via
the Chicago 81 North Western Ry.
to Denver, Colorado Springs, Pueblo,
Glenwood Springs and other points
in Colorado; to the Yellowstone
National Park, and to San Francisco,
Los Angeles, Portland, Tacoma, Sc
attic, Vancouver and other points
on the Pacific Coast. Finest of train
service. Most convenient schedules.
These low rates permit a choice of
routes going and returning, and the
arrangements for stop-overs and re-
turn limits are liberal. Great chance
to visit the Seattle Exposition and
various points enroute. Ask Chica-
go & North Western ticket agent
for particulars and for free maps,
itineraries and booklets. 42-4t.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09
Big Dog Was a Hero.

Brycelin (Minn.) Sentinel:
Eyes. indeed" said the late Ellis
Jackson of Blue Earth, who for years
was locomotive engineer on the
Southern Minnesota railroad, and
later on the Omaha branch" from
Lake Crystal to Elmore, u like a
dog and | never kicked one yet but
was sorry for it, afterwards. Say,
a queer thing happened to me years
ago, just before come to the branch.
You'd think it queer for a rough
man like me to cry for ten minutes,
and nobody hurt. either, wouldn't
you? Well | did. and | can almost
cry every time | think Of it. | was
running along one afternoon on the
old S. M. at a pretty lively clip. and
was approaching a little village
where the track cuts through the
streets. Islacked up little, but was
making good time. When sudden
ly. about twenty rods ahead of us a
little girl not more than 3 years old
toddeled onto the track. No use
talking, you can't even imagine my
feelings.
There was no way to save her.
1t was impossible to stop. or even
slacken much at that distance, as the
train was heavy and the grades de-
scending. In ten seconds it would
have been all over; and after having
reversed the engine and whistling
down brakes shut my eyes. l
don't want to see any more. AS
we slowed down my fireman stuck
his head out of the cab window to
see what we had stopped for, when
he laughed and shouted to me: Ellis,
look here | looked, and there was a
big black Newfoundland dog holding
the little girl in his mouth, very lei
surely walking toward the house
where she evidently belonged. She
was kicking and crying, so | knew
she wasn't hurt, and the dog had
saved her. my fireman thought
it was funny and kept on laughing,
but, Jim, l cried like woman. |
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09
What a Woman Will Not Do.

There is nothing a. woman would not do to
regain her lost beauty. She ought to be
fully as jealous in preserving her good
looks. The herb drink called Lanes Family
Medicine or Lanes Tea is the most efficient
aid in preserving beautiful skin, :and Will
do more than anything to restore the roses
to faded cheeks. At all druggists and deal
ers, 25 cents. 1
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09
D. |. CRIMMINS
Land and Loan Co.
Sd Street, Redwood Falls
Next to Andersen's Photo Gallery
REMEMBER
Tuesday, June 1st

First trip to Southern Alberta.
Round trip from city 500, free Sleep
er, free coffee with lunch. O,SW.
Kerr Land Co. sold $4,000,O00 worth
of land last year. This spring they
purchased $4,000 acres of the choicest
land in Southern Alberta, laying just
west of Lethbridge, the cream of
Alberta, On these lands you can
raise
Wheat, 40 to 60 bushels per acre.
Oats, IS to 125 bushels per acre.
Barley, so to GO bushels per acre.
Horses without shelter or prepared
fodder summer or winter.
Cattle ready for the shambles
either summer or winter off from
native grass.
A perfect sheep country the best
grade of wool and mutton.
Cost of raising full grown horse
or steer is not over SIS.
Winter. wheat lands never give
out. The average price is going
higher. Buy now while there is
still opportunity at reasonable. prices
and terms.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

The Milroy Echo has it figured out
that the town man thinks that all
a farmer has to do is to sit in the
shade and watch things grow. The
farmer thinks that all we have to do
in town is to sit behind counter
and rake in money. This is the rea-
son that every farmer wants to move
to town and every townsman wants
to be farmer.
Sanborn Sentinel: Albert White,
the sporty fireman on the Vesta
branch. was in town Tuesday while
on his way to Havana, Cuba, where
he has secured a position as umpire
for base ball league which is made
up Of the natives Of that island.
Cherry Picker" ought to make
good as he has had considerable ex-
perience in that line in the vicinity
of Vesta.
The idea that person can pre-
empt seat in passenger coach by
the simple process Of depositing a
grip or suitcase thereon has been
shattered by decision just handed
down by the court of appeals. 1t
seems like rather trivial matter to
take before that august tribunal,
but somebody, it appears, had suffi-
Gent interest in the question to carry
it straight through the courts.
No man is really broke unless he
has lost good deal more than mon
ey," wisely observes an experienced
business man. Money alone will
not build up genuine success, even
in business; there must be a founda-
ton of honor and reputation. No
man, whatever his financial loss, can
be bankrupt while his character and
name are left untarnished. Charac-
ter is capital, not fguratiyely but in
fact, and many a man legitimately
uses it in his hour Of need. What
one is as we'll as what one has,
counts even in the money market
Forward.
Fortune tellers received quite a
jolt at the recent term of court at
New Ulm, when the Carmody pair,
Josephine and Cornelius, received
sentences Of ten months each to
Saltwater for smooth work in get
ting 5000 wad from a New Ulm
woman. The Review reports that
Josephine was the only one tried.
She made a clever witness and her
attorneys put up a stubborn defense,
but the facts were against her and
she was found guilty by a jury of
her peers, of grand larceny in the
second degree. Upon this verdict
being read in court, her husband
Cornelius Carmody, who was about
to be tried for receiving stolen mon
ey, changed his plea and admitted
his guilt. Saturday morning Judge
Quinn sentenced each of them to a
term Of ten months at hard labor in
Saltwater prison. They both re-
ceived the sentence with a great
show Of feeling, Mrs. Carmody
breaking down completely and Cor
nelius weeping bitterly.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

AD WRITER'S WANTED. There are
"A many positions open for ad writer's
aigh as year We can teach ya as
advertising in your spare time and at low
cost. Ability TO read and write and ambi-
ton to succeed are all you need. Write to-
pay for 1.-TWO Hundred Million Dollar adver-
Using Booklet which gives full particulars.
Paul Kann, Rep. l. C. S New Ulm, Mimi
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09
SHAKE INTO YOUR SHOES

Aliens Foot Ease, a powder. 1t cures
painful, smarting, nervous feet and ingrow
ing nails, and instantly takes the sting out
of corns and bunions. It's the greatest com
makes tight or new shoes feel easy. 1t is a
certain cure for sweating, callous, swollen.
tired aching feet. Try it today. Sold by all
druggists and shoe stores. BY m all for 25c.
in stamps. Don't accept any substitute.
Trial package FREE. Address Allen S. Ohm
sted, Leroy, N. Y.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

r. = ~
The absent-minded professor re-
turned home one evening, and after
ringing his front-door bell for some
time to no effect, heard the maids
voice from the second-story window:
"The professor is not in "All
right" quietly answered the profess
sor, 'I'll call again" And he hob
bled down the stone steps.-Lippin-
colts.
In the list of postoffices and salary
changes made for this year, pub
lished last week, we notice there
have been no changes in Redwood
county, but the salary at Marshall
is boosted a notch to S21OO and
Sleepy Eye to the same frure. Tracy
touching the $4,000 mark and Win
dom $1,000. Springfield is advanced
5000, to $2100. largely on account Of
the transactions of a successful mai
order house there.
Olivia Times: A deal was closed
yesterday between M. J. Bowling
and O. F. Hanson through which the
latter became the owner of the
Bowling farm, three miles northeast
of town, and the former takes in
part payment Mr.. Hanson's stock of
merchandise. The Times has not
learned what Mr.. Hanson intends
doing in the future, or what dispo-
sition will be made of the stock of
goods by Mr.. Bowling.
Tracy Herald: What do you
think of 81, O75 for one team? Last
Saturday A. ]. Lasby of Mortified
came up and bought the team at the
Hillview stock farm and Manager E..
j. Oppliger loaded the animals Mon
day evening and took them down.
The animals are pure bred registered
Percheron mares, coming four years
old this spring, and will weigh from
5000 to $500 pounds. For years
there has been steady advancement
in raising pure bred in place of
scrub.
Morgan Messenger: Mrs. B. A.
Eaton and daughter Neva returned
Sunday afternoon from week S
stay at the home of Mrs. Eaton's
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. John Schon
who reside near Redwood Falls.
Dentist Garlic says that his brother
Todd, who has been acting as agent
for the M. & St. L. Ry. Co. at Dud-
ley, has been promoted to the posi-
ton of train dispatcher at St. Louis
Park. Frank Readen has pur-
chased a 20-acre fruit farm near At
Italia, Washington. where he and
family expect to make their future
home. Frank still owns a section of
Canada land.
A school board near Fort Collins,
Col, has advertised for gray
headed lady school teacher with a
glass eye and wooden leg. so that
she cannot Dance" 1t seems that
the former teacher was one of the
ttractive kind who smiled on you
and danced. She had all of the gild.
ed youth of the countryside longing
to marry her. One of them she fin
ally did marry, hence the adyer tise.
ment. You know the attractive
school teacher! She's dear. But
it takes school teacher with bone
in her face to get the children to To-
cate Kamschatka and Patagonia
properly.-Long Bow man in Mime
apolis Journal.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

vOUNG MEN WANTED. who desire to
i earn better salaries and do more con-
genial work. If able to read and write. and
am bilious to succeed, we can qualify you for
a position as mechanical, steam, civil or
mining engineer, architect. etc. etc. Write
Kann, Rep 1. c. s., New Ulm, MINI.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

couldn't help it. You see, my little
Eva my only child-wasj just about
the same age. From that s.day to
this. | always feel like taking my
hat off to Newfoundland dog"
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

Why you should buy in Southern
Alberta if you figure on buying any,
where.
Because there is good water.
Because there are good markets.
Because it is a great stock country.
Because there is an abundance of
rainfall.
Because oats yield from IS TO 1875
bushels per acre.
Because barley yields from 80 to IS
bushels per acre.
Because coal cost only So per ton
delivered.
Because the land is increasing in
value steadily.
Because timothy and clover can be
raised in abundance.
Because spring wheat yields from 30
to 45 bushels per acre.
Because taxes are low and laws are
enforced.
Because it's the country for oppor-
tunities.
Because the climate is ideal and
there are no long winters.
Because all kinds of vegetables grow
in abundance.
Because we will sell our land reason
ably and on easy terms.
Because the soil is chocolate loan
with an unlimited depth of clay
subsoil.
Because the average yield per acre
of VIII eat, oats and barley cannot
be equalled by any state in the
union.
Because it produced the turkey red
winter wheat which took the pre-
MUM at the Portland exposition.
Because England needs an annual
supply of 2OO,OO0,OOO bushels of
wheat to meet her bread deficiency
Because when you buy land you are
not paying for road.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

Redwood county farms for sale.
Redwood Falls city property for
sale.
Several good houses for rent.
If you have anything to trade.
call. This is headquarters for real
estate business.
My commission is only 2 per cent.
Will rent your house for nothing.
Don't forget our June 1st excur-
sion to scenic Southern Alberta.
If you haye no idea of buying, go
if but for pleasure trip.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1909-06-09

You need not hesitate about using this
new Hair Vigorfrom anyfear OF its chang
ing the color of your hair. The new
Ayers Hair Vigor prevents premature
grayness, but does not change the color
of the hair even to the slightest degree.
Made by the ]. c. Aver Co.. Lowell, Mass
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1909-02-24
List of Unclaimed Letters.

WOMEN-Beaton, Miss Hazel; Bean,
Mrs. Nancic c. Blacke, Mrs. Ellen;
Dunton, Miss e. B.; Gillespie, Glenn
cntina; Hodgdon, Mrs. George; Jones.
Miss Lillian; Jones, Miss Florence;
Lyons, Mrs. Ellie: Merrill, Miss Laura; ;
Nelson, Mrs. Alice; Oliver, Mrs. AL
den G.; Pelicticr, Madam Ben; Poland,
Miss Marion E.; Ramsdell, Mrs. Will
liam; Sawtelle, Mrs. Ella; Strout. Miss
Alberta; Taylor, Miss Gertrude;
Thompson, Mrs. Martha E.; Went
worth, Miss Grace.
MEN-Basilico, Senior Garlic; Czuh-
vyriski, Josef, (2): Culver. Mr.. Frank
bennett, Thos. G.; Doe, Tony, .G);
Drisdell, James F.; Droun, Nous.
Onesimo; HILL Mr.. and Mrs. Glenn G.;
Jackson, Mr.. w. E.: kinll, Monsieur
Edgar, Mador, Mr. Frank; Miller, Mr..
Bert; Miller, Mr.. and Mrs. Bert Pat
terson, George A.; Shaver, Everett A;
Ward, G. c.; Ward, DR.. Allen W.;
White, Mr.. Fred.