davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
How to Laugh.

A tenor singer, by name Noel Film
ing, has just opened in Milan a
school of laughing" Mr.. Filming
contends that very few people know
how to laugh. They laugh without
taking any account Of the effect on
their listeners, and with a total disre-
gard Of the laws of harmony. Mr..
Fliming's complete course of "har-
monious hilarity" consists of ten les
sons, and it is claimed that a pupil
who has gone through the course con-
scientiously will be able to laugh with
that musical meditation. and artistic
finish which are usually associated
with the character of Marguerite in
Faust" 1t is said that the profess
sor already has a large clientele and
has received numerous letters Of en-
couragement from influential people.
It seems that laughter betokens ma
tionality. The German has a sonor-
GUS laugh, without bounds and with
out purpose. The English laugh is
cold, unfeeling, almost condescend-
ing, and among the gentry we learn
it is a rule never to laugh at all. The
Austrian has an elegant, light and in
fictitious laugh. The Viennese girl
laughs frequently, probably on &C.
count of her good teeth. The Belgian
laughs freely-the laughter of the
fair. The American has a ringing
and domineering laugh. The Ameri-
can girls laughter is bright and in
nocent. The French laughter is that
of a people who drink good wine, but
for some years there has been less
laughter in France, possibly due to
the greater consumption of mineral
waters, snobism and dental deterior-
alton. The city which laughs the
most is Brussels, that which laughs
the least Madrid, and that which
laughs best Paris.-London Globe.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

of fashionable dress, and such a one
as this, combined with the muff illus
trated, makes an exceedingly hand
some as we'll as smart set. They can
be made from any fur or fur cloth or
from velvet or almos, any fancy ma
terial.
The muff is made with the founda-
ton and the over, or rug, portion,
which are quite separate. The founda-
ton is made complete and the rug is
lined throughout, then arranged over
it and the two are tackled together.
The neck scarf is simply lined and in
terlined, while n end is slipped
through a band arranged over the
other by means Of which it is drawn
up closely about the throat.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
She Was No Has-B Been.

Madam" said the brakeman as
the train stopped at a village station
and a little old woman started to en-
ter the smoking car, 1.-THE car back
is the one YOU want"
How do you know?" she tartly
asked.
Because this is the smoking car.
She pushed past him and climbed
up the steps, and after taking a seat
she pulled out and filed a pipe,
struck a match on the, sole of her
shoe, and after drawing a few puffs,
she said to a man smoking a cigar
across the aisle:
"That young Teller out there don't
know half as much as he thinks he
does" u
"How so?" was asked.
"He took me for an old woman
that had never rode on the cars be-
fore, and told me this was the smok-
ing car"
"And you wanted this carr"
"Why, I never ride in any other
not unless my pipe Is broke, my to-
bacco all out and none o. you men
folks will lend me a cigar"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
GRAY Haired Beauty.

King Edwards reign has given US
the craze for eternal youth, but oddly
enough it has also brought US the cult
OF gray haired beauty.
A few years ago to let ones hair
turn white meant nothing less than
social suicide. But now all is changed
and several smart women are noted
for their white hair as well as for
their beauty and fascination. In
these days gray locks are apt to ar
rive in early middle age, and a young
face framed in white hair has a
marked and most piquant attraction,
and it must be admitted that the
blanched brunette gets the innings
Strand Magazine.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

us, and another that Christianity had
deluged the nations with blood. 1s
Christianity, he asks, a religion OF
meekness and mildness, or of muir
der and massacre? 1t may be n or
the other, but it cannot be both at
the same time.
You remember the humorous poem
by John Godfrey SAKE about the four
blind Hindus who went to see an
elephant. They could not see the ele-
plant, but they said what they had
seen. One happened to lean against
the elephant and declared 1t was
much like a wall. Another got hold
of his tail and described him as being
like d rope. Another got his trunk
and said he was a serpent, and the
fourth ran against his tusk and said
he was shaped very much like a spear.
The fact is that they had not seen the
elephant at all. That is all. And
that is my sermon. The DIRECTORS
have never seen Christianity at all;
they have never understood Chris
tianity at all. They have seen mere
fragments-the tail or a Of the
elephant-but they have not seen
Christianity and know not what 1t is.
The difficulties Of religion are
great, but the difficulties Of unbelief
are infinitely greater. 1t Is not true
that Christianity in its fullness is a
simple thing that anybody can grasp
in two minutes. There are difficulties
and perplexities, but the difficulties
and perplexities and problems in
which you involve yourself by the
rejection of Christianity are far great
er than those involved in it's accept
ance. I could present half a dozen,
I will present one If unbelief has
stated the case truly to us, Jesus
Christ was only a peasant boy, a car
penter and a fanatic for religion, who
lived in an obscure part of the Ro-
man empire and died as a criminal
after three years of agitation. That
is all. And yet Christianity, the most
tremendous and colossal fact in the
world, has all grown out of that!
Men and women, ignorant and wise,
in widely different circumstances, tell
you that they have been down and
have been raised, have had burdens
lifted from their shoulders, strength
came to them, enabling them to bear
their loads, they have been conscious
of sin and realized forgiveness, the
chains have dropped from their man
acled spirits and they have walked in
the freedom of manhood and woman-
hood, they tell you they have been
lost and were found. I myself have
at times seen through the vail that
hides the invisible from the visible
and have been sure Of a God, and !
have risen from what I thought the
very gates of death and have walked
the hills of life again, and found that
my Saviour was by my side. If you
want to know whether Christianity
Is true, try it. The objections contra
dict each other, and are not true.
Christianity stands and Christ makes
His appeal still to you tonight and
offers the invitation: "Come unto
Me all We that labor and are heavy
laden, and I will give you rest"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
An nl-Timed Bouquet.
Nv JAMES Fl. COLLINS.

Some years ago an attorney was
called in by a large company and
handed a lease.
Give us your opinion" said the
president. I'VE have a great deal OF
this sort of legal business, and it is
only fair to say that your opinion
nay mean much to us and yourself
The lawyer went through the doc
ument with some care, but quickly,
and on the spot.
"Um-will you tell me what firm
drew up that Instrument" he asked,
at length.
mo firm at ALL" was the reply.
For five years we have drawn every
lease made by our company right in
this Office. My subordinate here, Mr..
Johns, is the only man we have ever
found who thoroughly understands
the complications and conditions Of
such transactions as we enter into
The attorneys face frightened.
This Is one of the best drawn
leases I have ever examined" he said
heartily. You are wise to handle
such matters inside your own organ
ization. I commend your business
Judgment"
Can you suggest any improve
ments?"
None whatever" declared the
lawyer.
Can you discern any flaws?"
"No-emphatically! Mr.. Johns.
continued the attorney, turning to
the presidents assistant, II want to
congratulate you, as a lawyer, upon
your thorough grasp of this most
difficult branch. In my opinion this
instrument is unsssailable. 1t will
hold in the highest court of this
State"
That is what we want-your hon.
est opinion" said the president. You
have given it and we are much
obliged to you, and shall be pleased
to have a bill for your service. My
dear sir, the highest court in the
State declared this lease null and
void last week, and we have lost a
ten thousand dollar suit upon ill.,
From The Circle Magazine.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Advertising as q Tonic.

There are periods in all classes OF
business, including newspapers, and
among all men, for that matter, de-
clares Fourth Estate, when the need
of a tonic is felt-when some sort OF
stimulation is necessary.
This does not necessarily mean
that the businesses or the papers are
deteriorating. These periods occur
naturally, at intervals, and it is some
times difficult to explain the reason
for the feeling of lassitude-not to
say depression.
1T may come in the spring or it
may occur in the fall, but is pretty
certain to happen along at some time
or other.
Then it is that the businesses or
papers experiencing the feeling OF de-
bility need a tonic - they must be
subjected to some bracing influence.
Quinine and iron may do for a man
under the weather, but the best tonic
for business depression is advertising.
1t will impart neW energy to any con-
Germ not broken down beyond re-
demption and will infuse additional
vigor into the strongest organization.
Advertising is an economical treat
ment which is certain to have a bene-
fetal effect if taken before it is too
late to be Of any good.
Do not wait until the last moment
before you test the virtues Of judi
cious advertising.
Take a tonic o and then, no mat
ter how strong you may be, and it
you are depressed take tonics until
the depression disappears.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
The waist is made with a ftte,

The waist is made with a fitted
timing, which car be used or omitted,
as liked, and consists Of the front
and the backs with the shaped yoke.
The waist itself is tucked and Joined
to the yoke and the trimming is ap-
piled On indicated lines. The sleeves
also can be made with or without the
fitted Innings, and can be tucked, as
illustrated, or gathered, as liked.
The quantity of material required
TOR the medium size is four and three
fourth yards twenty-one or twenty
four, three yards thirty-two, or two
and three-eighth yards forty-four
inches wide, with ten yards of band
ing and one and fve-eighth yards of
edging.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
The Turnover Collar.

The turnover collar and stiff tail
ored tie have kept a firm grip on
popularity despite all efforts to GUST
them from favor. The latest tempter
is the made stocks in every color anS
cut. These closely resemble the crush
collar worn several years ago. They
are made up in soft Liberty satin in
any shade, drawn tightly to a boned
foundation. They are finished at top,
or at top and bottom, with a fine
pleating of mousseline de sole or net
Of any becoming depth.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Rendering Tribute to God.

There are three ways Of rendering
tribute to Christ-with the mind, the
heart and the will. l do,not appeal
to your minds. No man Of sense to-
day denies the Christ; that day is
past. I do not appeal to your hearts
and work on your sympsthies. It's
easy enough to make women cry and
get into a state of ecstasy so often
mistaken for real surrender to Christ.
1 appeal to your will, for it's with the
will alone that you must answer that
great question, What think ye OF
Christi"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Deafness Canpot Re Cured

bylocal applications as t~heycannot reach the
diseased portion of the ear. There Is only one
t%utfonal remedies. Deafness is caused bya an
inHamed condition Of the mucous lining of
the Eustaohian Tube. When this tubeis in
famed you. have a rumbling sound orimper.
feet hearing, and when it Is entirely closed
Deafness is the result, and unless the inflam-
nation can be taken out and this tube re.
stored to its normal condition, hearing will
b. destroyed forever. Nine cases out Of ten
are caused bycatarrh, which is nothingbutan
infamed condition of the mucous surfaces.
We will give One Hundred Dollars for any
case ofDeafness Caused bycatarrh)t that can
not be curedbyHall's Catarrh Cure. Sendf for
circulars free. FL. CHENEY g Co., Toledo d.
Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
The Purpose Of God.

The purpose of God through this
revelation for US is not knowledge
alone. Men devote their lives to sci
ence and philosophy. His purpose is
not physical, power. 1t is not wealth
and luxury. God comes through His
word to give US eternal life and par
don from the power Of sin.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Wearing Green Tulle.

There is going to be a good deal OF
tulle worn. Its new, heavy weave
makes it available as a serviceable
accessory. Bright blue will be more
favored than light blue, but parrot
and apple green are to be in the
lead. Bows of this will be worn at
the neck on an evening bodice, in
front of the hat and to tie flowers.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Telephone companies are %endeavor-
Ing to collect part of the telegraph
tolls where the messages are deliv-
cred by telephone. The telegraph
companies claim that they are en-.
titled to make this use OF the instru.
ment and resist payment.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
HOmeopathic Loss.

Ethelberta is a Doctors daughter
just past six, which throws a sidelight
on the story the Philadelphia Public
Ledger tells about her.
On her sixth birthday E%thelberta's
father gave her a little ring with a
tiny pearl in it. Not very long after
that she appeared in her fathers
office, looking very w~oebegone.
20 daddy" she said, "I've lost the
little pill out of my ring!"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
INToLERABLE ITCHING.
Fearful Eczema All Over Baby's Face
Professional Treatment Failed
"A Dorfa,< C,ro nv Nufirura 49,

professional Treatment Failed
"A Perfect Cure by Cuticura.
when my little girl was six months old
1 noticed small red spots on her right
cheek. They grew 80 large that I;sent for
the doctor but,.fnstead of helping the erup-
ton, his ointment seemed to make it worse.
Then I went to a second doctor who said
it was eczema. He also gave me an ONT
ment which did not help either. The dis
ease spread all over the face and the eyes
began to swell. The itching grew intolere
able and it was a terrible sight to see. !
consulted doctors for months, but they
were unable to cure the baby. l paid out
from $40 to $50 without relief. One evening
I began to use the Cuticura Remedies. Tina
next morning the baby's face was all white
instead of red. I continued until the
eczema entirely disappeared. Mrs. p. 3.
Gumbin, Sheldon, To-, July l3, 1905"
Potter Drug & Chem. Corp, Sole Props.
of Cuticura Remedies, Boston, Mass.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
a Lovely Gown.

A picturesque gown is of crepe de
Chine in that shade of blue best de-
scribed as hyacinth, with a draped
sash, also of crepe, in dull purple,
and adorned with embroideries or
purple and blue foliage and little Sill
yer bells threaded in and out of the
leaves upon a slender gold ribbon.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
New Fitted PetticOats.

New petticoats show the yokes cut
in deep points over the hips as we'll
as in the centre front and often IN the
centre back. The skirt itself is SO
gored that there is no fulness at the
top, where the yoke is stitched over
it
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
The Man Who Succeeds.

Notice the man of whom it is gen.
orally said, HE is successful; he is
getting along" Notice that he at
tends to his work; he is polite; he
doesn't drink; he is honest and pays
his debts. No man ever succeeded
without these qualities -Atchison
G1oha
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
White Hats.

The desire for white hats with elab-
crate indoor costumes is growing
stronger. Wide, white satin sailors,
trimmed with morning glories, are in
high fashion. These are worn with
one-piece frocks of w~istaria, violet
and amethyst.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Fare the Under Brim.

You should face the under brim Oh
YOUR new hat. The women VINO nave
tried TO face the upper brlm pro-
nounce the thing impossible.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

The quantity Of material required
to make the rug and the muff for
either the woman's or the misses size
Is one and seven-eighth yards twenty.
one, n yard forty-four Or fifty
inches wide, with two and one-half
yards for the lining for rug muff and
scarf and making the f]ounGation
muff.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Chance.

There is no such thing as luck in
the world. 1t is an error of thought,
a misapprehension Of tie nature of
things, to imagine that we are in any
sense under the dominion of chance.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Tailored Suit Styles.

Tailored suits follow the same lines
as last seasons linen suits, proVloeo
the prospective owner has not'gro"n
much thinner or more fleshy.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Puffs Held in Place.

Each one of the puffs arranged at
the back of the Psyche k2ot is held in
place by a larse-headed she'll pin at
each end.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Soft.Clinging Skirts.

The tendency toward scft-cllnglng
skirts now extends to below the
knees.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
.QBINl\{T5iERfESTa0N0MN;22

New York City. - The latest
blouses are made with just such long,
pretty sleeves as these and this model
can be utilized both for the separate
waist of net. thin silk, lingerie ma
terial and the like and for the entire
gown. in the illustration II is made
of fine lawn combined with banding
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Itch cured in 30 minutes by Woolford 1.
Sanitary Lotion. Never fails. AT druggists.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Manhattan Borough, of New York City,
has a population Of l6l persons to each
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
The Reward.

God puts consolation only where He
has first put pain.-Madame SWEET
chine
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces infamma-
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Austria has produced more tine skaters
han any other country,
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Only One "Bromo Quinine"
That is Laxative Bromo Quinine. Look
COR the signature of E. W. Grove. Used the
World over to Cure a Cold in One Day. 25c.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

By the use of liquid air a soap bubble
NAV be frozen solid.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

The microbe population Of a t~welve-ounce
piece of cheese has been estimated at 81
600, O00, 600. N.Y.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

Piles Cured in 6 to IA Days.
Pazo Ointment is guaranteed to cure any
case of Itching, Blind, Bleedingor P~rotruding
Piles in 6 to IA days or money refunded. Soc.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20

The German empire consumes 5000
tons of tobacco q year.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Plumage Hats.

Plumage hats are principally n
dark. natural pheasant shades
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1909-01-20
Nfuf and Neck Scarf,

Rug Muf and Neck
Scarfs that fit closely up about the
throat are among the latest features
The San Francisco call., 1909-01-19

one result of the long continued spell Of rainy
weather was that superintendent Grant closed
tho EmeryriIle track yesterday for working
purposes and training operations were confined
TO the inner track.
The San Francisco call., 1909-01-19
Gossip of the Track

judge Hopper announced at the close Of yes
terdav's racing At Emeryvile that Jockey Al
bert Walsh bad been iadennitely suspended ex-
rept for the stable Of Colonel ". T. Appreciate,
his contract employer, as punishment for the
tactics 70 which he resOrted while riding cam
- ses me long slot tnal ne Mboed sesono -
-he fourth race. This the race which the
fog prevented the general public from viewing,
and the action Of the stewards was based on
reports received from officials stationed at vari-
ols points along the course. supplemented By
what the judges themselves observed in the
stretch According to the official statement,
Walsh repeatedly fnterfered with Warning aud
Lord R0ssington, the other forward contenders
in tie race.
b. d Beams. who died At bis home in Oak
snl sunday. one Of the best known clockers
r;l the American turf familiar neure on west
ern racetracks for q quarter Of a century, ne
. lad the reputation of being one OF the most
. fkillful and competent timers thar ever neld a
watch the horses ln morning gallOps- Many
Fl lorseman made practice OF consulting Beams
hs 10 what their horses had done In preference
70 relying upon their timing In his long
career Beams came in contact with most Of the
leading western furfmen Of the last decade or
two snd the fund of "reminiscences which he
capable Of drawing upon was not only in
feresting and entertaining but highly compre-
hcnsiFe.
d. a. Beduell's consistent mare Dainty Belle
'gas 30 badly cut down in the race IN which she
was beaten By Yankee Daughter SATURDAY that
'nor owner fears she may become the victim OF
blood poisoning The mares condition neeessi-
.9iod her Withdrawal from the race IN which she
vas scheduled 70 start yesterday
TIE injury that Hanbiidee sustained in his
last starr may not be serious IN It's effect
as Trainer Ham al first feared. Ham now has
ropes that II may not be necessary 10 throw the
horse out of training indefinitely
Jockey Keogh's condition was 50 much i'm
proved that be was able 70 resume riding yes
- terday.
= one result of the long continued spell Of rainy
weather vas that superintendent Grant closed
Tho Emeryvillc track yesterday for working
purposes ana training operations were confined
10 the inner track.
Former Jockey Walter Miller has decided 10
defer his departure for New York until the latter
part ~ the week.
Robert Coscr0re. secretary Of the interstate
fair held each fsll at Spokane. was visitor At
Emeryvile yesterday, en- route from the cast
80 his home IN the north. He announced that
The usual six DAYS race meeting would be heio
ln connection with next falls fair at Spokane.
z J. Ramsey boosted Estella from $500 70