davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

laws of competition VIII operate. but not
in the old way. Potential competition
there may be. but not actual competI-
ton Prices are fixed in almost every
line OF business. and not only prices.
but conditions OF safe and other factors
in distribution Of product Public inter
-venuon to see that the consumer gets a
square deal in this maze Of private reg
ulation is al once termed socialisuc. and
Mr.. Carnegie is asked what difference
there would be between state regulation
OF prices and State socialism. one vital
difference is that in the first there would
be private ownership of the means Of
prediction and in the other public own
ership- It is just the difference between
public and private ownership Of natural
naOnopolies carried over into the field
OF artificial monopolies.
But # State regulation Of prices is
socialism. what is the regulation OF
prices by a board Of directors. or by lit
re groups OF men representing the bulk
Of the production Of certain commodities?
And what escape have we from the au-
thority over prices now exercised by
comparatively few men in almost every
line Of production II not TO the power
Of the state. exercised IN behalf OF the
public? Yet il may be that the power
OF the State IS more 10 be feared than
the authority Of individuals, however
great in the regulation OF private indus
try. It Is a realm where wise statesmen
dread 10 intrude.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Mr.Knox Goes In.

Now that the comedy Of reducing the
Secretary Of states salary has been
enacted, with the approval OF all, or al
most all. our constitutional lawyers. Ar
Taft may be congratulated on having
struck so advantageous q bargain. Mr..
Knox. al $500 per annum. viii be easily
worth twice as much as a good many
other gentlemen at s12ooo, and the next
administration cannot be accused Of hav-
ing an overpaid head Of the State De
psrtment How easy It all comes about
Senator Knox IS disqualified 10 hold
Cabinet Office until March next. On
that date his disQualifcations magicslly
disappear. and Mr.. NTaft Is able 70 ap-
point him 10 a place the emoluments
whereof have not been increased during
his Senatorial term Of Office.
That such a transformation has been
willingly wrought by the interpreters of
constitutional mysteries IS a notable testi-
moniaI OF the general feeling as 10 Mr..
Knox's personal worth, and a tribute 10
M Tafrs popularity among all classes
and parties. II has been felt that no real
object would be attained by opposing
technical obstacles 10 Mr.. K1ox's ap-
pointment Had some unworthy purpose
been 81 view when IL was proposed 10
lift the constitutional bar. we can very
easily imagine that the Constitution
would have been very strictly construed.
or had partisan feeling run high. there
might have been a different conclusion 10
the matter
This seems an appropriate place 70
notice one OF the pleasing incidents of
the removal Of the bar 10 Mr.. Knox's
appointment We refer 20 the amlable
prediction on the part Of the four Demo
cratic members OF the House who re-
ported against the bin 10 remove his
ineEgibuity that the Office Of Score
tary OF state viii probably be held fo-
eight years By its next incumbent A
most comfortable thought. which per
vades large masses OF our people. that
our political troubles are over for at
least two Presidential terms. Eight years
OF Taft eight years Of Knox. and eight
years OF constitutional goverument-un-
less some obscure provision is inviting
" overlooked
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
TRIAL BY JURY.
Reduced 10 an AbsurdIty In the
Cooper Murder Case.

Fr1m TIE Yer YORK Evening Pos-
Trial By jury reaches its acme OF ab-
surdity In tie case OF the murderers Of
Senator Carmack. now pending az Nash
vile. After more than three weeks OF
elimination Of the intelligent. a jury was
found on Saturday which contains four
absolute iliterates. two others VINO can
barely reau. while all twelve swear that
they have not read newspaper since
the shooting. some adding with a fine
superiority Ike that OF Mr.. BaIfour. that
they had not read paper Tor ten years
SO much for the ridiculous laws IN Amer
lea. Ostensi5ly aiming 10 secure impair
TALLY in q jury. but really obtaining
stupidity Better openly I'll the box from
the Idiot asylums and the ranks OF the
defective. We sincerely hope that the
Nashville Jury VIII be capable OF follow
ing the evidence and doing its duty: but
certainly the law OF Tennessee has done
its best. not oniy 70 prove that IL is an
ass. but 20 make sure that the really
competent men shan he barred from try
ing an issue. not only Of life and death.
but Of civilization itself Perhaps We
needed such a ghastly exhibition in order
TO induce lawyers and judges to set
about the long delayed reform Of our
jury laws
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
MornIs of I.ife nnd a.

From the Hartford TINES
Truth and decency must come back to-
gether. not only on the stage. but in the
minds and the private lives Of men and
women. If We are 10 keep the fountains
Of character pure. The mere closing Of
a few theaters now given over to enter
tainments that would have pleased the
libertines Of Charles IFS time in England
two centuries ago wiz not be Of much
avail
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
New Terror Ii liz

From the P1liladcluhia Recoyd
The Maxim device which dissipates and
destroys the noise occasioned by the firing
Of gun. without decreasing the speed or
otherwise affecting the fight Of the bul-
let. adds new terror 20 the use OF fire.
arms. It viii make stealthy gunpowder
crime much less liable 20 detection when
a man may load his weapon with smoke
less powder and discharge. It without tell
tale noise.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Protecting Life ut Sen.

From the Batm0ro American
The bin introduced in Congress making
It mandatory for seagoing vessels carry
ing passengers to be equipped with wire
less telegTaphy ought 10 be unnecessary
So potent a means Of saving life as this
system has been proved ought 70 suggest
itself. But unfortunately. experience
shows that the sanctity Of human life is
judged in modern commercialism like any
other tbing-bv its ccst.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Cut Down Expenses.

F.om ne On4ha Bee.
With ordinary economy in the prepare
ton Of appropriation bills. the revenues
from the usual sources should be AZ =
quate 20 ali regular and reasonable de-
mands. Instead Of looking for new OBJ
jects Of taxation. Congress might better
hold down expenditures. just as a business
man or a corporation would dc under ike
conditions.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Prom me tHlcaso Nc0s-
President Roosevelts enemies would not
object 70 seeing him seriously tncOnveni-
enced by anti-Japanese agitation on the
Pacific Coast. and some q them might DE
willing even TO lose a little sleep in max
ing a good ion Of Il
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Frum TIE Philadelphia Press
The number Of people who discovered
Senator KHox's ineligibility is growing
very rapidly. Soon there won't be any
body in the country who didn't know il
all the time
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Pushing the Auditorium Project.

An auditorium such as It IS proposed TO
erect here az the Capital viii pay good
Misunderstanding good dividends. There
IS not a shadow Of doubt on this point
Any public enterprise Of this character.
50 obviously undertaken in the right
spirit and so surely destined TO promote
the city's material welfare. Is bound TO
be a dIvidend-payer The stock itself may
not yield immediate returns. but the prof.
ect VIII begin 20 pay dividends from the
moment il IS contaminated
Every convention that comes here and
finds adequate accommodations: every in
ternational congress that seeks a meet
ing place and discovers that washington
can best provide for its needs and COM
fort. and every great function that such
an auditorium naturally would draw TO
the nations city, VIII return dividends,
both direct and indirect A project that
helps a community as a whole. that
makes for its upbuildiBg and develop
ment. IS helpful 70 every citizen IN It.
and therefore. calls for generous popu-
lar support -
Both the Washington Board Of Trade
and the Chamber Of Commerce have. with
most commendable eanestness and acuv-
ity. Joined in the movement for the erec-
ton Of the auditorium. Interest in It IS
not 10 be allowed 20 vane. Now IS the
time 70 push IT 70 completion The way
20 DO il is o subscribe promptly Tor the
stock
As We has said before, Washington
cannot sffoTts , fail in this undertaking.
Il IS going 70 t9cceed, aad succeed hand
sOmely.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

From the Boston Trans7irt.
Chicago protests against the coffee duty.
The one conspicuous article which has
not advanced in price should remain TN
disturbed.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Mr Taft is disposed somewhat siren
uously to favor lock canal at Panama
Indeed. it seems that he has keyed him
SELF up to a point Of mild excitement re-
garding the same.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

a Philadelphia doctor says fresh eggs
have a distinct value IN the treatment Of
stomach troubles. We have feared eggs
would get 10 the point where We should
ind il necessary 70 look on them as
medicine exclusively.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Editor Burke. OF the Macon News. has
been telling Editor Barrett. Of the Biz
mingham Age-HeTsld. how easy It IS 20
get a little something for ones stomach s
sake in Crackerland. We suppose Col
Barrett was gallant enough to explain
tie
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

"A~scientist has succeeded in breeding
a duck without a breastbone. He wiH
not be thanked; the world VIII refuse to
relegate to the rear the old expression.
a little Of the white meat. please. ="
says the Johnstown Democrat So far as
the duck is concerned. however. the ex-
preston never had any standing in polite
society, did it,
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
ExRIafned.

What do they mean by an endurance
test"
Two chaps Dragging shout their re-
spectve makes of automobiles
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

The Charlotte Observer admits that DR..
Cr1m was not born in North Carolina.
This admission, however. will in no wise
be accepted as reparation for past trans
gressions in the Observers claim depart
ment.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

We should ike 70 see the Office of vice
admiral revived in the navy. but If # can
only be done al the expense OF a reopen
ing Of the sampson-Schley controversy.
We do not know that Il Is worth while
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
b 4Iorr Romancr.

Why does a romance always end with
the marriage 81 the happy pair2'
Because realities confront them thence
forth TIE next question IS whether 10
board or keep house"
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

An Indiana contemporary declares II
interesting 70 watch orr experts getting
around constitutional fences" They do
not get around them, as a rule-they
merely vault them
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

II appears that JacI Binns cannot re-
ceive a Carnegie hero pedal because his
noble deed was PERFORMED without the
three-mile limit People IN this country
about to embark IN the hero business
viii 90 well 10 look up the rules and
regulations governing the game
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
wonder WHY.

Why don't you write a poem on this
wireless incidentg
7 guess III have 70. Kipling seems 20
be holding unaccountably back.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

waste your comic valentines on some
body else; most Of them flatter US" said
the Nashville American the day after
We suppose It IS not much fun 70 send
comics 10 folks who take them in that
manner
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
lar snnnort

We plead guilty 70 having made refer
ence yesterday TO Jacobs coat when,
obviously enough, we meant % say 10
seph's;" though jacob may have affected
one OF those variegated things On occa-
sions, for aught we know 20 the contrary.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

7 am not discouraged says Mr. Bry-
an. Perhaps not Mr.. Bryan is a valiant
fighter The Democratic donkey may be
q tribe dIseouraged. however.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

A member OF the Turkish Parliament
recently called the grand vizier a liar. p"
The question OF the color line IN the Ana
Mas Club viii likely be raised ultimately.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
A LITTLE NONSENSE.


When he has naught to write about
A poet ne'er- repines.
He finds 1t quite the thing to write
About a dozen lines
he likewise finds i well enough
To use little guile.
lis no disgrace TO i'll up space
In
good
old
staircase
stvlel
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Future Rough Riders

t--m the Charleston Nevs and Courier.
In case Of war an army Of rough riders
might be recruited from the ehaefTeurs
who violate the speed limit
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
No Doubt.

do you believe in Inspiration"
"Oh. yes. Goun0d probably wrote his
brilliant Jewel Song" the day The new
cook arrived
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

They say the horse will have 70 CO.
IN believe it when see an equestrian
statue Of an automobile
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
Mn.te in NntionnI Ontro.

Prom the Rochester Herald
Our national income is ample. Il is our
national outgo that IS foolish and waste
ful
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

balloon viii be anything more In the
next hundred years than a platform from
which observations may be taken and
from which under the most favorable cir
cumstancss communication with head
quarters may be had
No flying machine viii be able TO take
into the upper regioR enough high explo-
sives to 90 anything more than the
merest local damage provided it were
possible to direct the aim Of the means Of
destruction There are too many con
.siderations Of art which must be adjusted
with the greatest nicely Of mathematical
calculation. Those who understand the
effect Of an explosive appreciate fully the
restrictions attending such q form of at
tack.
This does not make it any less i'm
portant Of course, that Congress should
render all possible aid to those engaged
in solving the problem Of aerial naviga-
ton. but there should be no public ex-
.pectation that warfare is rendered i'm
possible because OF any deadly influence
introduced by military ballooning. II
thar were the case. warfare would be
transferred to the sky; and that must
continue 10 be the theme Of those writers
Of the Jules Verne school Of fiction
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Wonder II any jealous statesman ever
told Henry Clay his name was 'mud?' %
asks the Philadelphia Record. Probably
but the idea did not stick.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

Better hurry along with Washington S
Birthday, the Inauguration. and so on
The baseball teams are headed South.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

The Winning OF the South by Will
ian Howard Taft. promises 20 be one OF
the best sellers Of the day" says an en-
thusiastic contemporary Fiction?
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

i WAS glad 10 pass through P@nsyl-
vania.~ said Mr. Roosevelt just after re-
turning from his recent Kentucky trip.
And on a mile-a-minute limited, too.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
4 Pickup.

Speaking of abandoned farms" re-
marked the press humorist. reminds me-
''Of whaty
I annexed an abandoned Joke to-day.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

I've had red-hot time" says Mr.
Taft. referring 10 his Southern trip That
is as good as the President could express
It. en-?
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

From the New York NAL
Is It going to be a Yale lock canal. ~.
Taft2
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

A hundred years from now We prophesy
that the death Of Theodore Rooseyelts
last surviving barber viii be quite q
frequent event
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17
II Officinl Game.

II you would now an Office seek,
Learn g0ldng lore
Get wise 20 "fore,
Stymie,T "mashie." and 'cleek.''
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

We regard # as one OF the bapnv incf-
dents Of the times that RaisuH IS keep
ing mighty quiet nowadays.
The Washington herald., 1909-02-17

The Charleston News and Courier says
the South Carolina legislature Is crowd
mean that there is one real statesman IN
that honorable body. after all
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1909-07-09
A Scholarly Child.

Boston has for long enjoyed the
reputation of having exceedingly learn
ed children who are able, so 1t is said,
to dispute on subjects far above the
heads of their elders Of other regions.
But Boston Is not unique. In a book
entitled "The Scot of the Eighteenth
Century" Ian Maclaren describes
similar characteristic Of the Caledo-
nian.
It is the inevitable tendency Of the
Scots mind to follow out every line to
its terminus, even If it be over preci-
pice, and to divide every hair till in
finity is touched.
1t Is not only in church courts, but
in market places and in railway sta
tions, in humble cottages as well as in
university societies, that the Scot Is
disputing, in every spare moment or
his time, from morning till night.
The story goes that a minister over
heard a mother questioning her child
as 1t supped it's porridge, after the
days work was done.
What" said this austere mother, us
the true relation between kirk and
state, according to the principles of
the Free church,"
And the favored child promptly re-
piled, Coordinate jurisdiction with
mutual subordination."-You Com
panion.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1909-07-09

policeman's club, at the end Of which
was a thick piece Of leather. This
had been used until within a few years
to awaken the sleepers, the parson
striking the pulpit with it forcibly,
thus compelling attention. Near the
pulpit was long pole, rounded at one
end, with which the sexton, 1t appears,
used to poke the ribs Of sleepers.
These two implements. intended to
keep the church awake, were used ex-
tensiyely in many out-of-the-way
places in Sweden twenty and thirty
years ago, and at the place in question
within a few years, but were discon-
tinued by the present pastor. Now
pinches of snuff are often offered to
the sleeper, who, after sneezing for a
considerable time, finds his drowsiness
entirely gone.
You're sleepy, John," said a Scotch
minister, pausing in the midst Of a
drowsy discourse and looking hard at
the man he addressed. he added, Take
some snuff, john"
PUT the snuff in the sermon, sir"
replied John.-Youth's Companion.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1909-07-09

What the Statute Did Not Say.

When Benz. F. Butler lived in Low
ell. Mass, he had a little black-and-ta
dog. One morning, as he was coming
down the street, followed by the dog,
a policeman stopped him and told him
that, in accordance with an ordinance
lust passed. he must muzzle the dog.
VERY WE'LL" said Butler.
Next morning he came along with
the dog, and the policeman again told
him of the muzzling ordinance and re-
uuested him to muzzle the dog.
"All right" snorted Butler. 1T Is
a fool ordinance, but I'll muzzle him.
Let me pass"
Next morning the policeman was on
the lookout. II beg your pardon, gen.
eral," he said, but must arrest you.
Your dog is not muzzled,"
Not muzzled?" shouted Butler.
mot muzzled? Well, look at him.
The policeman looked more careful
" at the dog and found a tiny, toy
muzzle tied to its tail.
General" he expostulated, this dog
is not properly muzzled."
Yes, he is, sir" asserted Butler
"Yes, he is. have examined that
idiotic statute and find 1t says that
every dog must wear a muzzle. 1t
doesn't say where the dog shall wear
the muzzle, and I chose to decorate the
tail of my dog instead of the head with
.h, ,nfarnaI CONTRA "-Saturday
Evening Post
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1909-07-09
"SIuuuard- Walkers"

An English writer upon "Old Church
Life" devotes chapter of his book to
the "sluggard- walkers" After having
described the duties of these officials
and their manner Of discharging them in
England and Scotland, he quotes from
Mrs Earle's THE Sabbath in Puritan
New England" to show that the same
practice prevailed here in early days.
The business Of keeping the congrega-
ton awake belonged to the tithing man
of the parish in case the preacher
failed to that extent. Some of the sto-
ries prove that certain Of the minis
ters were capable of rendering the du-
ties of the tithing man light.
At Newbury on one occasion an &C.
centric preacher awoke sleeper in
a novel manner. He observed a man
named Mark sleeping, and made use
of the Biblical words, Il say unto you
mark the perfect man and behold the
upright" But in the midst of his
monotonous sermon voice he roared
out the word mark" in a shout that
brought the doing man to his feet,
bewildered, but wide awake.
Mr.. Moody of York, Me-, employed
similar device to awaken and morti-
fy sleepers in meeting. He shouted,
Fire! Fire! Fire!" And when the
startled men jumped up, calling out
"Where?" he roared back in turn, I'm
the next world for sleeping sinners!"
During a visit to a church in Sarna,
Sweden, Du Chaillu saw in the pull
pit, near the Bible, what resembled a
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1909-07-09
The Same Old Feeling.

A young Louisville man who was out
west not long ago has returned, telling
a warn which he admits Is at his own
expense, but which he declares to De
about one of the most interesting ex-
periences of even his checkered career.
II was walking along the street In
a western town." he said, when sud-
denly across the way I saw a LOUIS
Vile girl whom / recognized immedi-
ately. She saw me, too, and expect
ed her to bow rather coolly and dis
tantly, as had been her wont back
home. I was cons. .derably astonished.
therefore, when she dashed across the
street, seized me with both hands and
fairly bubbled over in her delight. l
was so surprised, in fact, that 1 COM
mented on 1t.
Tim glad to see you, too l said,
when I had managed to extricate my
self from her exuberant greeting, but
to tell the truth, I hadn't expected to
see you so excited over my appear
ance. You always treated me rather
a la iceberg at home, you know; what
has caused your change Of heart"
"She was nonplussed for only mo-
ment, and then explained: Mr. Smith,
I've been away from home 80 long that
I'd be glad to see even dog II ne
came from Kentucky
'T let it go at that. at."-Louisville
Courier-Journal