The Wenatchee daily world. [volume] (Wenatchee, Wash.) 1905-1971, 1909-06-03
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The Return of Bill Carver,
BY DAVID II. TALMADGE.

Flash" term applied In kindly de-
risiop to the passenger train on the
Goose river branch of certain great
railway, was called upon one morning
to apologize I'm behalf of his engineer,
and his apology from end to end, in
Guiding stops and slowdOwns, as the
saying is. was not entirely devoid of
entertaining features.
"The truth of the matter is" said
he. addressing the principal kicker. a
travelling salesman from Milwaukee,
shat there's only one man on earth
who understands the teakettIe that we
use I'm place of real locomotive on
this line, and his names Bill Carver.
Bill knows her from the track up. He
gives her pat here and jab there.
and she settles down to her PAGES like
an old family horse. But let a new
man take her and she either gets on
to her hind legs and goes crazy or
else she sulks and won't go at all
worth mentioning. She's sulking this
morning"
81 should think sou growled the
Milwaukee man. looking at his watch.
Were forty minutes late now. and
I'll miss my train on the other road
Where is Carver anyway? What do
they let him go away for without TAX
ing his hanged old steam pot with
AfmY'
Hes at Geneva Lake by this time"
Pnnlfod ho cnpdrafor 0EIa m mn Aoxr,,
with US last night. He's on his wed
ding trip. By George. you wouldn't
have known him logged out as he was
In the regulation black, with his hands
In kid gloves and his feet in patent
feathers. He could hardly drag his
gaze away from his bride long enough
to recognize the teakettie; that's a
fact He was simply soaked full of
love or whatever 1t is. and he was pur-
ring like kitten. I'd never have be-
neyed 1t OF him. for of all the mean
things I ever heard any one say about
women as sex and abOut marriage
as an institution he'd said the mean.
est He never had any patience with
Idiots who repose confidence In petit
coats. He said women were all false
and were as foolish as barnyard fowls.
He was married to his ridiculous old
engine. be was, and he never wanted
anything better In this world
"Of course we married fellows knew
when he spOuted that sort of stuff that
he'd been disappointed in some love
affair and that he didn't really mean
aai he thought he meant, but none of
0s was ever able to pump him out. So
We Just laughed at him and told him
that sooner or later he'd meet some
thing In petticOats that would jerk
him over the line and into the round
house as mOgul jerks a sick switch
engine. 1t made him snort to tell him
dat. but it's precisely what happened.
III / ever saw man who'd lost the
last yestige of his power of resistance
It was him last night He was coal in
the scoop Of the fireman. nothing else"
How did 1t happen!" asked the Mil
waukee man, glancing again at his
watch and settling resignedly into his
seat
"Well, as near as | can make out
from what was told at Whippleville
yesterday by chap who lives next
door to Bills brides folks up at Cor
rey Center 1t was mostly Bits fault
that he didn't get spliced long ago in
stead of going away In huff and
turning himself into make believe
woman hater. The girl liked him all
right, but she was like most girls-she
didn't like to seem too easy. Bill might
have understood her If he hadn't been
50 lacking in Ordinary--what do you
call it?-perspicuity. He sized up
woman just as he did an engine. He
expected definite results. When he
pulled the throttle he expected her to
60. and when he put on the air he ex-
pected her to stop. and when she didn't
do these things he got mad.
Furthermore. he gave the girl to
understand plain enough that he was
dead gone on her. and that was an
other mistake. He's fair. square and
aboveboard, Bill Is, and he has mighty
little patience with any one who tries
to take advantage Of him. He's
no fish to be played on a string, he
says
"Now. there never was a healthy
girl. | suppose. who wouldn't play
with chap after she was sure she
had him hooked. It's the nature of
'em. And this girl did things just to
make Bill mad She flirted with 9TH
err fellows. and she had little spells of
false agony. when she made him
think he'd done something she didn't
like and wouldn't tell him what it
was. and she twitted him on his looks.
which aren't specially handsome, and
altogether she carried on In a way to
drive an honest man to desperation.
although most men In Bills place
would have brought her up with
round turn.
"And at last one night four years
ago Bill reached the limit. and for
about an hour he read the riot act to
her. He was like life or death spe-