davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01
OLLIE HEREFORD GErrING Els,

OLLIE HEREFORD GETTING HIS.
Ny sense Of sight is very keen.
My sense of hearing weak
One time I saw a mountain pass,
oliver Herford.
Why. Ollie, that you failed in this
II Is not not SO very queer
Have had a mountaineer.
Boston Transcript
But if I saw a mountain pass.
My eye I'd never drop;
And Se See the arn mou 9RSh she to Deisn
philadelphia Public Ledger.
I didn't see the mountain pass.
Nor hear its peak. by George:
But when 1t comes to storing stuff.
Exchange
Frowned dark while Ollie guyed:
A cloud o'sTspread its lofty brow,
And then the mountain side.
If Ollie could not hear its peak.
Or song of any bird.
OF lambs. or cows upon it's slope,
Be sure the mountain herd.
wonder if to Ollie dear,
might this question put
If he had stepped upon its foot7
B. K.
/, too, would ask a question
Perhaps you'll think it strange;
Does he cook on !. mountain ranger
III. @. E.
He didn't hear those mountains peak
While standing there below,
But might have heard the mountain
It's ali the mountain snow.
ETopeka State Journal III. G. p.
Worms to the Good.
When the National Biscuit Bakers
at Atlantic City last summer, DR..
Wiley, head of the pure food commits
sion, came on from Washington to
address one OF the principal sessions.
His attitude toward violators of the
food laws was well known to the
delegates. who, however, pressed him
with questions as to the quality OF
goods that could legally be offered
for sale to the public. The commits
sioner parted the thrusts of the biscuit
bakers with his ready wit.
The discussion ran into stale cakes
and biscuits. In the south, it was
stated, it is practically impossible to
keep bakery products for any
such stun is disposed of by selling it
to the negroes at cheap prices. Was
this right? DR.. Wiley was in a
quandary. The commission could not
interfere Wnen the SOOOS were not
shipped from one state to another,
and to express his own views on the
matter might get him into a needless
tangle. He thought rapidly; he would
be diplomatic.
Honestly, now, doctor, did you
ever see anything good with worms
in it?" urged one of the delegates
from the north.
Eyes" was the quick reply,
fishing box."-The Circle.
Wrong Again.
A political speaker was attacking
the government Of the day with more
venom than reason. A man at the
back of the hall at last cried you're
wrong, sir!" A little nettled, the
orator continued, without needing.
Presently, in answer to another
strong assertion, came again, you're
wrong sir!" The speaker looked
angry, but continued on the war
path.
you're wrong, sir!" again rang
out.
Angrily addressing the persistent
one, the orator cried, Look here, I
could tell this man something about
this government which would make
his hair stand on end!"
you're wrong again, siri" came
exultantly from the critic. as he stood
up and removed his hat. His head
was as bald as the proverbial billiard
balI-Tit-Bits.
Hard ou the Senate
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Votes for womenl' shrieked the suffra-
today women are haTnessed tn tn E nIowpsl
Votes for women!" why not oats for
women?' suggested the mere male crea-
ture.-Puck
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Please, sir, me grandmother" Tell a
new one. Johnny" Promised to take me
to de game today If you'll femme on" He
got off.-Pittsburg Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

'I heard Henry say the other day that
Jimmy was his alter ego" ''Oh, the idea
And everybody thought Jimmy was his
dearest Observation-Disclosures American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Hes starting out in the literary field
very confidently Yes; he expects TO
make 'em elongate that five-foot shelf by
at least eighteen inches. "-Philadelphia
Bulletin
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Tommy-Pop, what do men mean by cir
cumstances over which they have no con-
troll? Tommy's Pop-Wives, my son.
Philadelphia Record.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

chap" How so?" Never claims he was
happier when he was poor. Always says
he's happier new.'-Kansas City Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Blobbs-What's the matter with Hen
pekke2 He seems quite depressed. Slobbs
oh, made the mistake of telling him
to make himself feel quite at home.-Phil-
adelphia Record.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

What do you want to marry that snake
charmer for?" IT cannot live without her. :"
Yes. you can. Swear off."-Washingtoh
Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Magistrate-What brought you here
Prisoner-Two policemen, your honor.
oner-Yes, sir, both of them.-Kansas City
Journal.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

II Dunno said Uncle Eben, whether
IT'S better to have mo- money dan brains
Or mo brains dan money; but heaven
help de man dat aim got any of either. -
Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Caller-Are you sure your mistress isn't
in? New Maid-I hope you don't doubt her
word, sir!-Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Held you know 1 had become an &C
tor? She-No; but heard you had gone
on the stage.-Ally Sloper's.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

The general consulted the Typographical
chart. You understand, colonel" he said.
that the charge on the enemy's fortified
tions necessitates the most reckless dis
regard for human life' ct understand
general" the colonel replied. THE for
lorn hope that leads the movement will be
composed exclusively of amateur chauf-
feurs. ''-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

He Knew.-Mrs.-Oh, Jack! Dolly told
me the most exciting secret, and made me
swear never to tell a living soul! Mr.
Well. hurry up with 1t. I'm late to the
office now.-C1eveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

do you think actors ought to narry7
Yes, but think some of them shouldn't
dc. 1T quite SO frequently. ILLUSTRATED
Bits.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

DE man who is lookin' fob trouble -
said Uncle Eben, generally finds 1t. But
he mos always doesn't manage to meet IN
wifi de particular kind he felt Competent
to manage. '-Washington Star
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

| whom you greeted?'' HE is the third
husband of the first wife of my second
husband."-Sourire.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01
HUAOR or THE Day

do you always express your opinions
to your constituents without reserveT"
NO" answered Senator Sorghum. 'T
tain prejudices. A man who expects peo-
pie to believe all he says must be careful
not to say all he believes.
Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Mr.. Biower-Your automobile hit me- but
l got its number all right? Fair occu-
pant-So NIGEL It will make capital dec
Grafton for your den.-Puck.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-09-01

Keeping Down Expenses.-Spund-Wh
a lot you sleep. Whenever I come, you are
always in bed. Tipples-Yes, find It
Observation-Disclosures Blaetter.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Scobey Items
:
kIlkIkIAkkll
EALRlAlAllA

From our Special Correspondent
Feb. =, 1909.
Miss Rasmussen, of Reds,one. is en-
ployed as private teacher for the Manter.
mach children.
A new baby boy arrived at the vonkus-
ter bone on the 9th of January.
August Ievnager contempla,es building a
new house in the spring. having sold his
old one to VIII Downing.
Gus Colan is spending the winter months
with Nose Tingley.
Tom Larson is spending the winter with
relatives and friends at Ostrander. MINI
Here's luck"
A. N. Tande is in Poplar receiving med.
ical aid from DIR. Atkinson.
Leo vonkuster returned last Friday from
Poplar where he had been for week hav'
ing his hand doctored for blood poisoning
His hand is much better.
Miss Lottie Oldrock is visiting friends a
Marshallto~n. Iowa.
The stockmen at Scobey are rejoicing
over the fine weather of the last few weeks
The chinook took off nearly all the snow
leaving the range in fine condition.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Bob Sheppert's Party
A Highly Humorous Report by a
.Noted Author" Given
Verbatim.

Their was a Card Party at Bob Shep-
perts Residence last Monday Night and
Every Batcheler Of Homestead and Brown
vile was present and the Bachelors Band
of Homested aud Brownsille fnrnlshe, the
Music and all had a Hopping Time Bob
kept his Bachelors Brothers BUSY Eating
Peanuts til the couldent eat any more and
AT twelve o'clock Bob Servet one of the
Finest Suppers what ever Walkei Across
the Prairee and the all Filled up to the
Top of their Instruments. their was one
Batcheler Musician that plavet Horn
and Some of the Other Bachelors Playet
Some Other Horns and Card PLAYING and
Restrictions and Other Play Things were
kepet up until Seven O'clock in the Morn
ing when Every Body went Home Salts
tiet and Wishing Bob Mary Xmas and a
Happy New Year and the all say that Pob
is the Best Cocher Between Scheepe Gre, k
and lost Creek.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
GAS AT CULBERTSON
A Gas Vein Tapped at at the Zeno-
George Coal Minc-Elames
Squirt Thirty Feet.

While blasting in the Zeno George Coal
mine near town recently gas vein or ifs
sure was struck and the gas became ignited
by the explosion. The flames burst out
with a roar and filled the mine extending
some thirty feet in an oblique direction.
BY piling clay and stone into the fssure
and tamping Il down the flow of gas was
shut off. This was done in order to get GU,
the coal as the gas filled the mine and in
terfered with the workmen.
]. z. Bruegger and ]. G. Nugent. owners
of the mine. expect in short time to fully
investigate the gas find and develop same
to see ii there Is oil underneath in paying
quantities. Indications are that there is Z
suficiency of gas to light and heat the cit,
of Culber,son. and this in itself will be o
immense value.
There are also indications Of oil and ga
in many other places in the immedia,.
vicinity of Culbertson. notably in the Sc
called Mann Coulee and along the rivei
south of Culbertson. These will all be in
vestigased and developed as soon as capita
can be secured by interested parties
With plenty Of sand suitable for tn,
manufacture of glass along the Missouri
river and plenty of coal, taken in connec
ton with gas and oil in prospective develop
men,. Culbertson certainly has a prea
futnre
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Poplar Items
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
From our special correspondent.

From our special correspondent.
Jan. AZ. 1909.
Poplar Camp, No. Io7o4. NJ. w. Of A.
meets each Ist and sd Wednesdays At
Opera House Hall at p. m. Geo. n.
Robinson. v. c.: L. L. Brink, Clerk.
TOO late Tor las, week.
Don't forget the Hard Time Ball at the
Opera House this Friday. February 5th-
Married a, South Royalton. Vermont on
January 10th. Miss Mabel Eta Brooks and
NJ. A. Daniels. Their many friends wish
them happy journey through life. They
are expected home about the middle Of
February.
Fred Sullivan and family left today for
Shelby to live. Their many friends hated
to see them go but are pleased to know
that he has bettered himself.
The large safe for the Traders State
Bank has arrived and has been placed in
the bank building.
Ed Olson returned from Stanley. ". d.
last week.
Leo Won kuster. of Scobey. has been in
town the past week. having a very sore
hand treated by DIR. Atkinson.
Miss Lena Opsal has recovered from hel
attack Of pneumonia and is able to again
resume her duties at Hotel Bawden.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Soldier Balks Death Plot.

1t seemed to |. A. Stone, a civil war
veteran. Of Kemp. Tex. that plot existed
between desperate lung trouble aud the
grave to cause his death. Il contracted a
stubborn cold" he writes, tina, stuck &c
me. in spite OF all remedies, for years. NJ,
weight ran down to 1 80 pounds. Tn n
began to use DIR. Kings New Discovery
which restored my health completely.
now weigh r7s pounds For severe Colds
obstinate Coughs. Hemorrhages. Asthma
and to prevent Pneumonia it's unr,vaisd
soc. and sf.oo Trial bottle free Guar
anteed by the Valley Drugstore.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
POPLAR, Mont, Feb. 4. rql

Poplar. Mont. Feb. ;. 1909.
Married last Wednesday at the Catholic
church by Father Slain. Miss Angeline
Thresa Pereau..and William Brough. Their
many friends wish them happy journey
through life.
Mrs Hank Cusker and children. of Wolf
Point. were visiting her sister. Mrs 7. T..
Bawden this week.
Don't forget the Masquerade Bali at the
Opera House Friday, Feb. 10TH. This is
to be the Ball of the Season. so don't for.
ge, to come. Leave your orders for cos.
tunes at the store Of II. NJ. Cosier.
Maj. Mclaughlin arrived today on No
and will start tomorrow morning to pay
OFF the Santee Indians. There are AZ
here and each will draw sr57.4o.
There is to be a wedding soon. can you
guess who'
Messrs. {. S. Hall and X w. Henr,
will entertain the Thursday Evening Club
Thursday. February nth at the residenc.
of DIR. Atkinson.
Call on II c. Walker and see the hand
some present that the Searchlight is nov
Offering for renewals and new subscrip
tons.
Charlie Waite. of the South Side. broush
in his son. George last Saturday, who hal
his feet badly frozen about two weeks ago
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Many Sieepless Nights, Owing to
Persistent Cough. Relief
Found at Last.

For several winters past my wife has
been troubled with most persistent, and
disagreeable cough. which invariably es-
tended over period of several weeks and
caused her many sIsepiess nights" writes
VIII |. Hayner. editor of the Burnley. Col. =.
Bulletin. Various remedies were tried
each year. with no beneficial results. In
November last the cough again put in an
appearance and my wife. acting on the sug-
ges,ion of friend. purchased bottle OF
Chamberlain Cough Remedy. The re-
suit was. indeed. marvellous. After three
doses the cough entirely disappeared and
remedy is for sale by Valley Drug Co.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
Catholic Services
at Poplar and OsweEo

Catholic service will be held
At Poplar. Mont. each third Sunday ev-
cry month.
At Oswego. Mont. each fourth Sunday
every month.
Mass at 10 a. m: Benediction at o. m.
The Catholic Priest and Missionary will
be for the FIRST half of each month on For,
Belknap Indian Reservation and in the
second half of each month on Fort Peck
Indian Reserve.
For sick calls. baptisms and marriages
persons concerned apply to Father ri. F.
Slain. Poplar Mont.
The Catholic Priest,
Piacidas r. Slain, Sp.,
Missionary.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05

and on Monday Doctor Atkinson removed
all the toes on the right foot
II. f. Patch went to Fairview last SUI
day on business. returning home today.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05

Old Magazines at hall price Mt the
Searchlieht Office. Munsey. Leslies.
Everyhody's. Cosmopolitan and many
others.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05
LINcoLSDAY PROGRAM.

9 a. m-... Boys Parade and Flag Salute
p m. Citizens meeting ar Opera Hous.
Presiding. officer. c. Is. Lohmiiler
Musical program in charge OF Mrs H
NJ. Cosisr and Mrs. H. c. Walker. Pro
gram committee: Mrs. VIM. HiIger. Mrs.
II NJ. cosier AID Miss Mary Mcleod.
The searchlight. [volume] (Culbertson, Mont.) 1902-current, 1909-02-05

For good set Of harness go 10 Brenna l.
Schow Harness Shop. 3atf
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-11-09

Another sea wren race will be SAILED
next Sunday and It is possible tina
Commodore Wilders boat will b,
ready TO compete. ,ss,,
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-11-09
Changes Of Cullen
And Reilly Meeting
By Y. L. STEVENSON.

Cullen and Reilly are SUN uh-
matched for return go Tor the
championship OF the Hawaiian
Islands. Both the little Fellows are
keeping In condition, however, ana
If amtch Is made they VIII nave
no trouble In quickly gettihg ihto
shape for a long-drawn-out pattle.
On being interviewed last hieh'
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-11-09
Great Soccer
Game Saturday

When, at a meeting Of soccer play.
ers. held yesterday afternoon, It was
decided to select q football eleven to
play against the team from the British
cruiser Bedford, the greatest enthus.
iasm was shown all round.
The Bedford boys proved In San
Francisco that they are fine aggre-
cation Of soccer players, and In their
match against the best team In Cali.
fornia held their own and no score
was made by either side.
1t Is good to hear that decent
match is being arranged for the sail.
ors as on the last occasion Of their
being here they were sent up against
lot Of small boys.
The match next Saturday will be
played at the League grounds and no
admission charge will be made. At
$3.50 the teams will line up for what
should be one Of the best exhibitions
Of soccer that has been seen In these
islands for years.
A strong team has been selected to
represent the town against the sailors,
and 1t goes without saying that the
match Is going to be shorter from
the kick on till time Is called.
Jim Fddes will referee the game
and. as he knows all about the rules
and is an old.time player himself. his
decisions will be always sure to give
satisfaction.
The town team IL given below and
all the players mentioned are request.
ed to turn out for practice game this
afternoon at o'clock sharp at old Pu'
nahou field. II the home team Ii to
have a chance against the sailors. all
the individual players will have "a
/ practice hard and get together as soon
Is possible.
The, team dnally selected IL % fol
lows: Bob Chillingworth, goal: T. W.
p. Grey, right fullback; Johnny Clarke
left fullback; Bob Cation. fullbacl
sub; L. q. Blackman. right halfback
David Center, center half; Harry Bal
ley. left half; J. Mscsulay. halfbaoh
sub: Carl oss. outside right forward;
Dwight. inside right; Elisha An
drews, center forward; J. Macaulay
inside left; Fred Bailey. outside left;
J. B. Walker, Sinclair and John Cat
ton, forward subs. So I
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-11-09
|Haleiwa Colt /;
Toutnarnenl

Down at Haleiwa there is some
thing doing In the golf line, ant
Manager Kimball Ia working up the
greatest interest In the game at the
beautiful hotel.
Last Sunday the Haieiwa Golf
Club started hole-play tournament
and the frst round was completed.
The weather was ideal for golf.
and as the links were In perfect or
der the day was much enjoyed by
all those who took part In the play.
There were quite number Of Wis
itors to Haleiwa on Sunday, and
besides enjoying the golf, many
walking parties were made up by
the people who came In on the
train.
The Haleiwa Golf Club. although
not Boosting OF a large membership
roll. is a strong little organization.
and the members are all very keen
on the game.
The results of the play last Sun
day were as follows: Kinney beat
Pillar, Q Up and 1; Mahaulu beat
McKinnon, 2 up and 1: Dc Mana
beat Voscheller, Q up and. s.; DR..
Wood beat Robertson. 3 up and 4;
Kimball beat Avail, z up and 8; A,
Mahaulu beat Kraft. up and 8;
Beadon beat johnson. 3: up and !. !
The play all around was good
and. as a handsome trophy has been
provided for the winner OF the
event. much interest 10 being shown
in the tournament. The winners
will play on during this month te
decide who takes the first prize.
Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-11-09
Local and Coast
Auto Doings

The year 1903 will 60 down In mo-
tor. cycle history AZ another season
Of prosperity and advancement re.
marked . Coast paper. IL safe to
say that, no other season has shown
such progress In the perfecting OF the
machines. nor has any other year
equaled II In the amount OF sales. The
little two-wheeler IL no longer looked
upon a. luxury or playing. but
IN . medium Of transportation both
economical and expeditions. and to
some people II IL almost a necessity.
As q controller or regulator OF trafiic
II II looked upon as Indispensable In
upwards Of nifty Of the leading cities
Of this country. whose special police
are mounted on the speedy little We
hicles. In speed It has shown itself
the equal OF the fastest cars, having
to its credit miles In ~ seconds on
circular tracks. nearly seventy.two
miles IN the hour. and better than q
1mile-a.minute. for six hours. Its abll
ity to climb the steepest grades has
attracted attention particularly IN oil
billy sections. and II ID perhaps be
cause OF this power that II has become
SO popular In San Francisco. II 10 now
satisfactorily reliable, .t}
There will not be 20 many radica
changes In the 1910 models AZ there
were IN some OF those OF the 1901
make. The test Of time has showr
| that which Is preferable Id nearly q
that goes to the making Of 4 motor
cycle, and the manufacturer Is profit
Ing by his experience and putting onl,
that on his machine which he know
will be satisfactory to the general pub
lie. As nearly all the larger maker
furnish from there to four models. an,
either chain or belt transmission, It 4
not hard to suit the purchaser. Tw'
and three-Quarters horsepower is nov
the smallest engine furnished, and tn
machines run from this up In four, nv
and seven horsepower sizes, the tw
latter being In the twin.cylinder mod
els. 1t has been proven conclusivel
that the belt transmission Is onl
adapted to slow speed engine, an
some makers the coming year will OF
ly apply II to models Of that kind. Tn
chain has. proven the fastest and mos
n rsiiable Of the two transmissions, an