La Junta tribune., 1909-08-21

tel just to make show OF business
for the house.
Did you ever stop to think that
the business man is the most abused
fellow in creation? Every scheme for
public improvement. legitimate or H.
legitimate. must tie financed by him.
He is held up for donations for the
private and public enterprises. His
time is monopolized by statesmen, beg
gars, kickers and loafers, and yet,
through 1t all he keeps smiling
face to welcome the cash customer.
The man who makes money in a re-
tail business is entitled TO II.
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Now remember, Mary" the teach
er said Just before the school exer-
cises, IF you forget some Of the
words when you are singing your
song, don't stop. Keep right on. Say
um-tum-tummy-tum or something like
that and nobody will know the differ
ence. Now don't forget"
On exhibition day little Mary
whats In name?) edited her
audience with something like this:
and she wears a wreath of
Around her tummy-tum-tum."
J. w. Fisher and family are spend
| ing short vacation at Denver and
Boulder. Wednesday a few OF his
friends sent the following telegram
to the genial proprietor Of the post
office bookstore: Just finished in
voice OF stock in store and find ii
three carloads short. Have ordered
shipment OF new goods. Hurry home
and help unpack same" To make
the joke more realistic, the telegram
was sent c. o. d.. with explicit In
s,ructions to the Denver office to ac-
cept nothing In the shape OF an
answer unless charges were prepaid.
A London paper recently offered
series Of prizes for the best tongue
twisting" sentences. The prize win.
ming combinations are:
The bleak breezes blighted the
bright broom blossoms.
Two toads totally tried to trot to
Tedbury.
Strict. strong Stephen Stringer
SHARED slickly six sickly SILKY snakes.
Susan shineth shoes and socks:
socks and shoes shines Susan. She
cesseth shining shoes and socks. for
shoes and socks shock Susan.
A haddock. . haddock. = black
spotted haddock: = black spot on the
black back Of q black spotted had.
dock.
Oliver Oglethorp okled an owl and
an oyster. Did Oliver Oxlethorp
ogls an owl and an oyster! II Of.
liver Oglethorp osled an owl and an
oyster. where are the owl and the
oyster oliver Oslethorp ogled!
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Preliminary work on the arrange.
ments for the erection Of new
q 900 school building at Horse Greek
were brought To an abrupt end the
other day In an. altogether unlocked
for manner. J. W. vandivier moved
bis house moving psrsphernaiia to
the scene OF action and began opera.
tions all right. but they did not last
long. The old building was to be
moved of the site. and no sooner
had The work 70 that end begun than
. swarm Of bees came flying out froo
between the walls Of the old struc.
ture. They were closely followed BY
another swarm. and still another.
workmsn yere driven to shelter. and
lost NO time getting there. Neither
did they argue the matter with the
hostile bses. Il Vas later discovered
there we're twelve hives Of bees In
the walls ce the old school house. and
Il was decided 10 walt until cooler
weather before completing the work
Of removing the building.
TIE man Who leaves bis bicycle
standing around loose these days
without havins II chained 10 . brick
buildias o. . telephone pole. 10 Ger.
taialy taking Desperate chances Of
having 70 hunt the county DER 10
fad Il -Four bisyciss have been
stolen In Ia Junta during the past
two weeks. but fortunately Ill have
bssa rscoversd. The latest victim
was Gerald Daimler. who left his
wheel standing In an alley tack Of