davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

AT last" says Mr.. Wood. II began
using Doan's Kidney Pills. and before
one box was gone. | went through
four days OF intense pain. finally pass
ing a stone. one-halfby fiye-sixteenths
OF an inch In diameter. haven't had
a sign OF kidney trouble since"
Sold by all dealers. so cents box
Foster-Milhurn Co.. Buffalo. N. Y.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30
VIRGINIA MERCHANT RID OF A
VERY BIG GRAVEL STONE.


C. L. Wood. prominent merchant
of Fentress. Norfolk Co. Va, was suf-
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30
peopIe rnIk About Good rhlngs

Twelve years ago few PEOPLE knew Of
such a preparation as a Powder for the
Feet To-day, after the genuine merits Of
Aliens Foot Eas have been tol year after
year uy grateful persons, it is indispcns-
alb g TO millions. Il is cleanly, wholesome,
healing and antiseptic and gives rest and
comfort to tired aching feet.
It o4res while you walk Ovrr 5000
testimonials. limitations pay the dealer a
larger profit, otherwise you would never
be offered subst tute for Aliens Foot
Ease. the original foot powder. Ask for
Aliens Foot Ea ,e, and see that you get it.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Take Garfield Teal Made Of Herbs, it is
pure, potent, health-Gvine-th most ia.
tional remedy for constipation, silver and
kidney Diseases At all drug stores.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Salt is mined in nearly every por-
ton Of the German Empire.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

The French government has been
asked to contribute $4,000 to a
weaving and embroidery school.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Europe has nine museums for ex-
hibiting the dangerous parts Of ma
ehinery.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

New York spent s1779s.09s.26 in
street-car fares within three months.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Wireless telegraphy has driven the
carrier pigeon out Of the French
Navy.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

VVANTED-5 Lady agents IN ell parts Of the
w United states to advertise and sell
BLACK Grow Stockens" to wearers. Good COM
mission Address.
HACK Crow srocKES Co. Newton. N. @.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Whether from Colds, Heat. Stomach or
Nervous Troubles, Cspudine will relieve YOU
It's liunid-pleasant to take acts immedi-
ately. Try It, 1oc., 25c and soc. a. drug
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

Eyes, was at the play last night.
/ could hear well enough, but ]
couldn't see"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1909-04-30

couldn't see."
''Hat?"
mo"
'Postf"
mo. Broken eyeglasses"
That's nothing. | was at the
play myself | could see we'll
enough. but couldn't hear any
thing"
700 far away?"
"NS."
Gold In your head?"
mo. Box party. Chicago Trib-
une.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
The Joke on che Jockey.

A few years ago famous jockey
was engaged 10 ride tie fasorite Il 81
important race. On the war 10 the
post Ne found himself gathering along
side q rank outsider. the noua. Of a
stable boy who had only jus. con-
menced riding
You'll have to be careful with that
brute. B." be remarked I've ridden
him before. and you'il never be able TO
bold him
3. thanked The crack for the hint
and said that he would do his best
Halfway through tie race the cut
slider ard another were in front with
tie favorite close behind. Faacying
that the others were in difficulties. the
rider Of the favorite shouted:
Pull out, B., and let me through.
I've got the race In hand"
The crack was mistaken, however.
Looking back, the stable boy replied
with grin:
Il would. but can't bold him.
With which the novice let his horse
have his head and sho, away. the east
est Of winners. to The chasrin Of the
crack. who finished second.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Concealed Weapons.

Once In college town the rumor
that students were earring concealed
weapons reached the ears Of the local
police. The chief at once issued strin-
gent orders that the heinous practice
should be stopped One day q group
Of them passed a policeman, and one
Of the students in so doing put his
hand to his hip pocket Then, as If
reeollecting himself In time. be hastily
withdrew it and looked sheepishly al,
the policeman.
What have you in that pocket:' the
latter asked sternly.
Instead of answering, the student
and all his companions, as il panic
stricken, started to run. After chase
all the students were cornered and or
dercd to deliver up whatever they had
in their hip pockets.
sieekiy they obeyed. Each one car
ried corncob. The remarks OF the
policemen cannot possibly be record
cd Philadelphia Ledger
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Happiness and Joy.

Happiness. according to the original
use Of the term, is that which happens
or comes TO one By a hap-tilas is. By
an outward Detailing or favorable con-
dition- Il is what money yields or
will buy-dress. eluipase, fashion, lux
uries OF the Ia ble-or it Is settlement in
life. independence. lore. applause. adj
miration, honor, glory. or the more
conventional and public benefits Of
rank, political standing. victory, power
all these stir delight in the soul,
which is not Of the soul or its quality,
but from without; hence they are look
cd upon as happening to the soul and,
in that sense. create happiness. Joy
differs from this as being OF the soul
itself. originating in its quality. And
this appears in the original form Of the
word, which instead OF suggesting q
hap literally denotes leap or spring
. The motion is outward and not
toward, as we conceive it TO be in
happiness. II is not the bliss Of con-
dition. but Of character.-Dr. Horace
Bushnell
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Eccentric Count Bertrand.

Count Bertrand, who lived In Paris.
was very eccentric man, and to one
OF his eccentricities he ascribed his
long life. Once a year he would be
take himself TO bed and stay there Tor
three months. On these occasions he
would see no one but bis servant. who
brought him his meals. and even him
he forbade 10 speak. Just before the
Germans began the siege Of Paris the
count vent to bed, and the servant,
true 10 his injunctions. said nothing Of
The events going on around him One
day the bread proved SO bad the count
demanded an explanation, whereby, OF
course. he learned that Paris was en-
compasss.d by the enemy. springing
out Of bed. the count paced the door,
repeating What should a Bertrand
10 under such circumstancesr Sud
denly he stopped, excleiming. I'VE
should go TO bed" and 70 bed he went
AID stayed there until the siege was
over
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Mak;na History.

When Kinglake was writing his his
tory Of the Crimean war he received
letters from all sorts OF people con
cerned In the war. One day letter
with deep black border came from
two people in the colonies, husband and
wife. describing their grief Their only
child had been killed in the Crimea
They wanted to have him mentioned
in the History Of the Crimean War"
kinglake was touched and replied by
post that he would do his best il they
would send lin the necessary particu-
lars. Again letter, also black Dor
dered, full Of thanks, but with the fol
lowing conclusion: I'VE have no par
ticulars whatever to give you. He was
killed on the spot, like many others,
but anything you may kindly invent
will be welcome. We leave it entirely
to your imagination" -Londop Chron-
icle.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
DANCER In Eve peultiees.

Do not poultice an eye In any cir
cumstances whatever Binding q wet
application over an eye for several
hours must damage that eye, the as
sertions OF those protesting to have
personal experience In this TO the con-
trary Notwithstanding The failure to
agSravate an existing trouble by bind
ing a moist application over an inflam-
ed eye, which application is supposed
70 remain for an entire night, can only
be explained by the supposition that a
guardian angel has watched over that
misguided case and has displaced the
poultice before 1t had got In Its fine
work. All oculists condemn the poul-
tice absolutely, in every shape and in
every form. Tea leaves. bread and
milk. raw oysters. scraped beef. scrap
ed raw turnip or raw potato and the
medley Of other similar remedies popu-
larly recommended are one and all ca
pablc of producing irremediable dam
age 10 the integrity Of the tissues Of
the visual organ.-Family Doctor
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Woman on the Bench.

Lyman Lazarus, for many years re-
eorder OF Bayonne, knew the people
who came before him When a wo-
uan appeared to accuse husband
who had beaten her he said III
send him to jail you'll come back here
tomorrow in tears and ask ne to let
him out no" she said, I will not
I'd Ike to have him punished" How
much shall l give him then" asked
Lazarus-"two months, one month, six
nonths:' The woman. who had begun
TO relent. was speeches.. I'm tel you
what I'll do" he said. You come up
here and take my chair, and whatever
sentence you pronounce will GO The
woman hesitated, but the recorder in
sisted The husband was arraigned be-
fore her. and the recorder IN a gruf
voice ordered her to pronounce SEN
tence. six months, three months, two
months. month-quick," he said; 'let
Us have It" The woman burst into
tears She and her husband embraced
and went out Of court rejoicing.
There said Lazarus. "If you come
back I'll give you six months EACH
New York Press.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Rhinoeeres 4 Bad Foe.

While easily stalked, the rhinoceros
Is dangerous customer, as most men
Will agree who have hunted him II
the rhinoceros gets ones scent he al
most invariably charges, often proba-
bly, from sheer curiosity. but that does
not make him any the easier to dis
pose Of. Moreover. he runs and turns
at speed inconceivable in beast Of
his vast bulk. Against his massive.
sloping head the heaviest bullet is a
mere flea bite, leaving no possibility Of
a stopping shot except with hard
nose ball cent fairly into the heart
through the chest An alternative is to
stand absolutely motionless, when
with his bad eyesight there is a posi-
bility he may mistake you for a tree
and veer past. Indeed. the best ruse
In the crisis Of any charge is to stand
fast and still, for even the unwounded
lion sometimes swerves in his charge
and retires before man who has the
nerve to wait his coming. = Edgar
Beecher Bronson in Century
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
a Nis4aken urifarm.

Uniformed omciais are cftea 3 pug
lie to American travellers An Instance
q this is given in Rs-co.iestioEls Of 9
Varied Career b. General ". F.
Draper. formerly American aznhasssz
dor to italy. General ard Mrs ORA per
were travelling IL Russis when they
had the following amusing experience
In the sleeping car:
Mrs Diapers rsa.d Marie, speaks
German as well as French, hu. Rus
sian IS berona her After Mrs DIa-
per's bed was made she desired an
other pillow, and Marie rushed into
the corridor to get one. Seeing man
IN uniform-the railway porre-s wear
nniforn<ste demanded n pillow in
German
I have no pillows said be.
a bolster. then said Marie
Il have no bolster
Then give me a couple Of towels 10
wrap up one Of these dirty cushions. y
Il have no towels either said the
Uniform. y am a colonel IN his mai
esty's imperial guard
Poor Marie nearly went into hyster-
les, and WAS called IL to explain that
no o6ense was meant
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14

In certain city. which shall be
rameless. a literary nan had asked
his wife as she was starting down
town to buy q couple 81 shirts FOR him
She asked him what Kind. and he al
swered, size Is"
Yes, but
Two dollars"
But want 10 know
ooh. the color: We'll, re plenty OF
white shirts. Get me something that
won't show SCOT Now. don't bother
me any more. please. I'm at work"
She did not bother him any more.
She went way and In the afternoon
returned with her purchases.
Here are your shirts. John she
said. laying them down before him
Why. they are coal black, Lucinda =
he exclaimed
Yes. that's the only kind that won't
show SCOT They are just what you
told ne to buy Now. don't bother me
by talking about them have got to
so and look after the children"
Being game" John took his nedi-
cine without Youths Com
panion.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14

From letter in last week s Rec
ord, written by Grandpa Tracy.
Of Dale, il will be seen that he takes
issue with Dir. Sheffield of Hartford,
regarding the question Of whether
or not there is an increased rainfall
in this region ever that Of the pio-
neer days Luckily, figures are al
hand which conclusiyeIy settle the
question The federal governments
signal station al Bismarck was es-
tablished in the seventies in 1873.
if we are not mistaken. A careful
record, based on measurement Of
every rainfall. has been kept there,
as well as Of the entire precipitation
Of each ger. There can, Of course,
be bu, little difference in the pre-
cipitation ia the adjoining counties
Of Burleigh and Emmons. The
record Of the capital City signal
station shows no material change in
the rainfall In fact, take the pres
ent year. Until the cloud burst in
Bismarck, this season with its fire.
quent rains was not up 10 the aver
age. and less than in some years be-
fore there was agricultural settle
ment in Emmons county. 1t seems
to be settled question that the
breaking up Of the prairie Sod and
keeping out Of big prairie fires has
allowed the rainfall to enter the
soil. Then gradual evaporation from
the soil has formed local clouds and
caused more frequent local showers;
and the rains, while not making
greater total for the year have come
oftener In other words, the rain
fall we have and have always had
since a record was kept have been
used over and over. That the
water enters the soil instead Of run
ming off over the burned prairie to
the creeks. lakes and sloughs is
shown all through the state by the
lowering Of, and in some cases the
total disappearance, in late years, Of
those lakes and large ponds that are
not FED by springs but from the sur
rounding water shed. Take Goose
lake. up in the Braddock neighbor-
hood, for instance. We do not know
how it is this year. But for several
previous years there has been very
small fraction Of the water in that
lake that there was before the prai-
RE fires were kept out and more Of
the soil plowed The writer can re-
member that when he went hunting
to that lake, in the eighties, it was
large body of water, and in some
places several feet deep. Surely, il
there is increased rainfall Of late
years, that increase would at least
overcome the lowering caused by the
water entering the soil and the lake
would be at least as deep and cover
as large an area as il did in the
eighties.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Effect o. Fear.

a vigorous young greengrocer, aged
twenty-seven, was arrested on a Tues
day on charges Of drunkenness and
assaulting policeman, who was as
sisted in securing him by Mr. Lyons
On Wednesday It was announced in
court that Mr.. Lyons was dead, and
the greengrocer was remanded to see
whether the coroner's Jury would hold
him In any way responsible FOR the
tragedy. By Saturday It had been
found that Mr.. Lyons death was due
to heart disease Of long standing, but
meanwhile the agonizing suspense had
aged the young prisoner terribly, his
black hair having become completely
Whitehall Mall Gazette.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Taken unaware..


Sir William Grantham was engaged
as political speaker in the. days be-
fore he took his place on the BEECH
and when he was plain Mr. Grantham.
On one occasion, while he.was deliver
Ing an address, man got up In the
audience and shouted out excitedly,
Its lie" Thanks" said the future
judge. Its lie" shouted the cx-
cited one again. You're gentleman, :"
said Mr.. Grantham sarcastically. ITS
a He" burst out his opponent again,
carried away by his wrath, but the
general laughter which arose at his
answer recalled him to himself again,
and be sat down discounted. London
81. A. r.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
A jas. Rehuks.

Il am" he said, "deformed. Pads
hide It Still, deformed am. and !
want to know why writer's always
make deforrned persons villains: Take
Quasirnodo In Victor Hugo's 'So,re
Dame Why. Quasimodo was little
better than wild gorilla, swinging
from the great bell and hurting the
priest down from the high tower.
Take the housemaid's clubfoot father
in 1bsens Ghosts There was a nasty
old man for you-a nasty. perverse.
evil minded old rooster, eh: Take Dick
Crookback In the immortal Williams
play Take Nosey the Dwarf in
Hauns classic fairy tale. Take the
villains in all fairy tales. for that mat
ter. They are one eyed, lame. hunch-
backed, clubfooted lot.
ut makes US deformed folks red hot
this literary inputation Of yiilainy. 1t
causes people TO think we really are
villains. Where's the child. after a
course OF fairy tales. that can be per-
suaded hunchback's soul doesn't
match his body!" Cincinnati En-
uuirer
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Willie obieet..

Among the representatives in con-
sress Is one whose lack OF personal
eomeiiness liz the basis Of personal
banter from his facetiousIy inclined
colleagues.
Why, Willie" said one ofithem to
the our-ycarold son Of the congress
man how much you resemble your
father
Yes, SIR responded Willie, with an
alf OF resignation. Everybody says
that, but don't think l deserve nt."-
Lippineotts Magazine.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
A Sinister Comment.

THAT new neighbor Of ours asked
US to let him use our hatchet and our
clothesline," said Sirius Barkers wife.
Did you give him the hatchet:"
Yes; the one that has hicks in it
and wabbly handle"
And did you give him the clothes
line that has been tied together In
eight places?"
YES"
well, that's case Of borrowing
trouble, all NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Star.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Russian Prineasses,

In Russia the term princess does
not mean very much, for the simple
reason that there are SO many of them
and that 1t is never royal title.
All the female descendants Of prince
OF certain rank are princesses, and
the result is that many princesses are
as poor and Of us little account as any
III used princess of fairy tale. The
real royal princesses Of Russia are
styled grand duchesses. They are the
daughters and sisters Of the car.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
ISOLATED TRACT PUBLIC
LAND SALE.
Bismarck, n. D.. Land Office,
Cant ~ 1000


Serial No. O3s94)
Notice is hereby given that, as di-
rected by the commissioner Of the
general land-office, under provisions
OF act Of congress approved June &,
1906, Public 1903, we will offer
at public sale. to the highest bidder.
at 10 O'Clock a M, On the 18th day
of November next. at this office, the
following tract of land, to-wit:
Northwest quarter of northeast
quarter and the southeast quarter
of the northwest quarter Ct Section
10, Township 100 north. Range IS
west of Fifth P. NJ.
Any persons claiming adversely
the above-described lands are adj
vised to file their claims. or objec-
tons, on or before the day above
designated for sale.
NJ. II. Jewell, Register.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
CONTEST NOTICE.
Department Of the Interior,
is. Land Office at Bismarck N. D.
Septenlber 20. 1909

September 20, 1909.
A sufficient contest affidavit having
been fled in this office by Mrs Earl
C. Briggs, of Marie, N. D.. against
Homestead Entry No. 3e20s Serial
No. O9l72), made July 8, 1906, for
north half of northeast quarter of
Section 26. Township l34 north,
Range "a west. by Sal A. Snabb.co
testee, in which it is alleged that Sal
A. Snabb has totally abandoned
said homestead entry for more than
six months next preceding the date
of said contest affidavit; that said
Sal A. Snabb has never had a house
upon, or resided upon said entry and
has never cultivated the same; which
default still exists; and that said al.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Gettino ]. st.r

Did you secure tickets for .tie,play.
hubby! inquired the New York. wife.
~ hear they are In demand.
hey are. but managed TO get
seats for two months from tonight
And. by the way''--
"Wen."
You might begin to get ready now 4,
: Kansas City Journal
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Knocking Hubby.

My husband thinks he is very eco
nomical" said the blue eyed woman.
He saves everything One drawer
OF his desk Is devoted TO time tables,
and he has some that are three years
d."-Exchange
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
Tho Annual Root.r

DO you know the difference he
tween an optinist and pess,mlsry.
res. indeed" answered young Mrs.
iorkins AN have TO do to see, the
allierence.i is TO observe Charley at the
beginning and Mt the end of,a baseb,l \,
season. "-Washington Star.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
a Bad M;x,,p

"Say." remarked one government
clerk to another I'm up against II
good and proper"
Whats the trouble?" qucried &. c.
No 9.
II got two medical certificates from
two different doctors yesterday" cx-
planned the party OF the first part
zone was certificate of health for a
life insurance company. and the other
was certificate of fitness to be semi
to my chief with petition for two
weeks leave of absence"
"Oh. that's nothing" rcjoiued his
fellow clerk. ''I'vc done that myself"
YES" continued the other. "but 1
mixed the certificates in mailing. The
Ill health certificate went to the IN
surance company and the certificate of
good health went TO my chief Seer"
Chicago News.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
To the Point.

A little boy hurriedly entered drug
store and asked the clerk for bot
tie Of liniment and a bottle of china
cement
Why" said the clerk, that's a
funny combination What do you
want with those things:"
Ma hit dad with teacup and broke
IT. exclaimed the boy.
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
LOW FARES TO MILWAUKEE.
VIA CHICAGO. MILWAUKEE
Z, 81 PAIL PAIL WAY

For the National Dairy Show De-
toberl ~ One and one-haIf fare
for the round trip 70 Milwaukee
from stations on the Chicago, Mil
waukee & st. Paul Railway. Mini
mum excursion fare, 5000. Dates
Of sale, October IA, ID, lG, II. IL. 10
and 20 Return limit, . reach start
ing point on or before October 2G.
Additional information from near
est ticket agent of Chicago, Milwau-
kee & st. Paul Railway. Or from
MIR. +. a. Miller. General Passenger
Agent, Chicago. (3o)
Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1909-10-14
The Unhonorsd P.onh..

\ visitor to carlyle'sibirthplace back
III the seventies said to;a native.
smart man, that Thomas Carlyle"
The native grunted.
Him smart? Why, Invent 10 sku,A
Wi' him"