Baxter Springs news. [volume] (Baxter Springs, Kan.) 1882-1919, 1909-12-30
PILLINCTON'S
PATENT
By Amo. R Well
lCopyrlght, BY J. 3. LlppInoOtt COD

A stock augmentation between Mr..
and Mrs. PiHington was the subject
Of women's inventiveness-or nom
inventiveness, rather. Pillington
prided himself on his mechanical
genius, and was always fishing for an
acknowledgment Of 1t from his wife;
but she, mindful of . house numbered
from attic to cellar with futile con-
trivances, observed always . grim
silence.
One day, as Mr.. Pillington was ex-
patiating on his favorite theme, Mrs.
Pillington CHANGED to be feeding the
baby with nursing bottle.
Il WISH" she remarked, that with
all mems superior inventive ability,
they would contrivs q good way to
feed a baby"
Pillington's interest was at once
aroused.
Now, that's just like woman!" he
exclaimed. Here's q field peculiarly
hers. Here's something forced on her
attention from the days Of Eve. And
yet I'll warrant that every patent
nursing bottle IN the world was in
vented by q man."
II should think sol" sighed Mrs. Pill
lington.
well, what's the matter with emf"
he inquired.
Matter? Everything. You can't
keep them clean. The hole gets
clogged up with q shred Of cloth. If
: you make It larger, the baby gets the
milk too fast If you keep the air out,
It collapses and the baby gets nothing.
If you let the air in, the baby gets the
collie. oh, they're horrid!"
''Lemme see It," and Mr.. Pillington
looked critically at the nursing-bOttle.
Maria Pillington, day after tomorrow
will show you what a man can do.
Evidently this thing was some wOm-
ans maneshift."
For two days the inventor was mys-
teriously silent, though sagely Observ-
ant at baby's feeding-time. On the
second evening he brought to his wife
with an air Of triumph, marvellous
affair.
what is IT." she asked.
"Pillington's Patent Feeding-Bot
tle!" replied her husband, proudly.
i've filed It. You try It."
Mrs. Pillington examined the appa-
ratus suspiciously.
whats this big bulb for?'
THAT, madam, is to clean It with
force the water In and out by suction;
also to force the milk into the mouth.
Now, no woman would ever have
thought Of that"
Il agree with you," remarked Mrs.
Pillington, dryly. "And what's this
brass arrangement in the neck?
Isn't 1t part Of some gas fxture?"
\ YES" Mr.. Pilllngton admitted, I'M
7 willingly-"yes, temporarily, 1t is.
4 But that's the great point. You see
this screw? Work It out, and you en-
large the orlflce; screw It in, and you
diminish the flow Of milk. Beauti-
fully simple, and yet no woman would
ever have thought Of 1t. Now try It
on the baby"
''Never!" shrieked his wife. What
poison his little froatsy-toatsy with q
horrid old brass gas machine?" And
she embraced PillingtOn, Junior. pro-
tectingly. Besides, how do you know
it'll work? Have you tried 1T"
mo need Of trying It," replied the
inventor. IF you had a mechanical
mind you would know It would work
Just by looking at It. Gimme the
baby"
II won't!" shrieked Mrs. Pillington.
"Try your horrid contraption on your.
self first. l don't believe you could
suck a drop through It."
'Tll show you!" said Mr.. Pillington,
fiercely. you see where the milk
ISL"
Yes, Mrs. Pillington saw.
Then her husband tipped back his
head, bottle in the air, and began
chewing the rubber neck. He grew /
red in the face. Evidently he was
getting nothing.
"It-it-doesnt seem to come, some
way" he confessed, at last.
"Any air.hole in itT asked Mrs.
Pillington, kindly.
"Air-hole? What'd I want Of an air
hole?" gasped her husband. "oh, yesl
/ have It. Gimme that knittingneedle.
Forgot a little point" And Mr.. Pill
ington jabbed q hole in the rubber
tube that Joined the bottle with the
section Of the gas Jet.
"But isn't that an air-hole?" Mrs.
Ellington Ventured to ask.
"Air-hole nothin'. It's q ventilator.
Now I'll show you how TO use that /
screw and bulb. Observe"
Mr.. Ellington threw back his head
once more, and this time to some pu-
pose. Whether It was the Knitting ]