Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1909-07-01

Psychosis Of a Hamper
By LOUISE AYRES GARRETT
Copyright, by j. B. Lippincott Coz
By LOUISE AYRES r N

thenon, Clarissa. 1t really does. It's
strange how these suggestions come
to me, transcendent Nominations that
open wide the windows of my being,
and register ineffaceable impressions.
That's just the way l felt when | sav'
this splendid hamper, 'Parthenoni'
something seemed to whisper; and
Parthenon it will always mean to me.
So a~ustere. yet so satisfyingly beauti-
full! How does it appeal to you?"
"Of course, dear" modestly re-
sponded Clarissa, I'm not clever like
you, and never have occult intima-
tons, So, to tell the truth, it merely
seems to me the biggest and baldest
hamper 1 ever saw. You'll forgive
me, Appolonia?" she concluded,
humbly.
I'm disappointed in you" Mrs.
Blander replied, ~palpably rufled. It's
humiliating to know that my compan-
ionship has done so little for you,
and that this hamper is to you moth
ing but a hamper, l hope you"-turn-
ing to Mr.. Booder-"can see in it m
thing beyond the material"
Mr.. Booder advanced to the side of
the wicker elephant and peered
within.
Il can't, ma'am," he confessed,
shamefacedly; there amt anything
in it I can see, not W. materials"
He continued gazing dejectedly into
the hpwnIS of tha hamnnr
If estheticism can snort, that low
word would best describe the sound
t of disgust with which Mrs. Blander
favored Mr.. Booder.
Are men but clods?" she cried.
Does intuition play no part with you?
Intuit, sir, intuit!"
Such was the commanding presence
of strong-minded Mrs. Blander and the
obedient servility of w~eak-minded Mr..
Booder, that in the twinkling of an
eye, and before Mr.. Booder himself
knew what he was doing, he had
leaped owe the side of the hamper
and was meekly gazing out at his res
olute customer.
!, Cbarissa showed herself not alto
gether devoid of humor and staggered
, painfully; but Mrs. Blander was SEN
sitive and silenced her by a glance.
What do you mean," she inquired,
behaving in this fashion? Come out
at once and explain your conduct"
Mr.. Booder clambered out of the
Parthenon and answered, defantly:
Won told mo tp do II ~
81 did nothing of the kind" contra
dicted Mrs. Blander in her most posi-
tive manner.
"Ill leave it to the young lady If
you didn't" he recklessly retorted,
You called out: Into it, sir, into it.
and if that amt plain English I'd like
to know the reason why"
Once again Clarissa Jared upon
Mrs. Blander's nerves, and with a
sweeping gesture the latter waved
away the hamper.
Amt you going to take it, after
all?" asked disappointed Mr.. Booder,
| loath to recommence his labors.
"Never!" cried Mrs. Blander. "Not
after it has been ~desecrated by ridi-
Guile and inhabited by ignorance"
Mr.. Booder quailed before her eye
and embarrassedly trundled away the
classic pile.
1t was not until all of the stock had
been paraded before her that Mrs.
Blander decided upon a medium-sized
: hamper that bulged in the middle, had
Y outspreading handles and a magenta
band near the top.
e THE magenta border is a blow to
me-" she explained to Mr.. Booder.
las the room in which it is to be
placed is in ethereal blue, and / fear
a subtle ~antagonism between the
e two"
s THE price of this" began Mr..
s Booder, pencil in hand, glad to be on
the ground he com~prehended.
But not so, Mrs. Blander raised a
supplicating hand as she said: do
not name the price, l beg of you. l
y make it a point never to sully an OBJ.
ject at the time of purchase by iden.
tifying it with the cost. If, when it
u is delivered, I find it beyond what I
e can afford, l simply return it. In this
way I contribute my mite toward
~spiritualizing trade. Now let us go,
Clarissa, and as we go let us cast fire,
quent glances at the new symbol, for
: | wish to carry away a distinct pic.
ture, unconfused with environing OBJ
t %iects."
So Mrs. Blander glided from the
room, part of the time backward,
Y looking out of half-closed lids at the
receding lines of the hamper and it's
magenta border.
She forgot to give me her adj
dress" malignly chuckled Mr.. Booder,
beginning to recover his spirits.
What Not to Read.
:. But admirable as is the effort to