West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1909-12-02


that same old main line (not a branch
line, mind you) OF the b. & o. which for
nifty years has extended through Preston
county from the Taylor county line near
liardman's switch on the west to Terra
Atlas back door on the Maryland line at
the east, and we never thought once of
the incalculable advantages TO the people
OF the whole county TO have the county
seat at Terra Alto, 5000 feet above the
sea on the main line OF the b. & o. And
right here permit me TO inform you that
scientists (of Terra Alta have recently
discovered and decided that the proper
height for county seats above sea level is
5000 feet. All county seats that are below
that level are TO be Immediately raised
work OF this kind guaranteed by the Terra
Alta Specializing Company, Limited).
AT this point bear in mind there are no
towns in Preston county on the main line
OF the Il. * o. except Terra Alta. In
passing Corinth, Rodamers, Amblersburg,
Nj. & X. junction, Rowlesbur9, Tunnel
ton, Austen, Newburg, and Independence
the Is. * D. main line defects, chassez,
tiptoes around subway and aeroplanes,
and never touches one of them. Besides
they are not fit places anyhow, says the
Terra Alta paper. No other town but
Terra Alta, says the paper, has "claims
for the courthouse"
So that cinches that HE away to the
main line OF the b. & o. Fly TO the Dor
ders OF the disputed territory-the Mary
land line-and locate your county seat mt
the only town that could possibly have
claims" for the courthouse, so says the
Terra Alta paper.
And hearken yet some more. Hear this:
The Terra Alta paper says that on account
of Terra Atlas vast push and energy and
the numerous industries che supports she
should have the county seat. Does she
prove this claim? She sure does-she can
prove anything. Well, what has she2 The
Terra Alta newspaper says she has two
flour mills principally buckwheat), good
thriving mills, a wooden mill, two marble
works, and an electric light plant. That
~ what the newspaper says. Now, elm
mate the wooden mill, which has been
standing idle for going on year, and
which was recently sold at public auction
TO try to raise money TO pay off its debts,
and which is still idle in the hands of the
new company; and eliminate the electric
light plant, which is now advertised 10 be
sold under a decree Of court for the pay
ments OF its debts; and eliminate one OF
the marble works, which is in the hands
OF receivers and will be shortly wound up
by decree OF court (such is Terra Atlas
eagerness to support industries); and she
yet has left in good working order two
| good buckwheat batter factories and a mill
Tor making tombstones. Good for her.
Again | say that settles i'll A town
| that can support such gigantic enterprises
| OF that character is entitled to the county
seat, or rather-which is the sole aim, Of
course-the county would be benefited be-
yond measure by shifting its county seat
| To town like that, especially il it is ad =
| lacent and decently contiguous TO the
| Maryland state line.
Don't you remember that the Terra
| Alta paper aforesaid in its great effusion
said that the farmer was in the habit of
killing two birds with one stone;" that
when he came TO court at Terra Alta at
the Maryland line, he could carry home
with him the diversified productions of
Terra Alta the Great, at the Maryland
| hnef Truer words were never spoken,
and | can imagine the happy and prosper.
/ Gus farmer going his way over hill and
| dale astride of his faithful saddlehorse
| Dick" going home smilingly TO his
| family at Evansville, or Glade Farms
with his ample saddlepockets-one filed
| with delicious buckwheat flour and the
| other containing a nice fat tombstone
each the product OF Terra Atlas Great
Masters. No where else in good old
| Preston county can such things be fashion,
| ed-except in Terra Alta on the Mary-
| land line. Move the county seat? Yea.
| with alacritY." Sure you want no fur
Their reasons for the good of the whole
| people OF the county," and i'm "spirit
OF fairness" as says the Terra Alta paper.
| And, OH, yes; one other thing equally
| important. When you want to send your
| boy or girl to college, don't fail TO get
him or her aboard the train at the nice
depot at Terra Alta on the main line of
the Il. d o. So says the Terra Alta
newspaper. Never thought of that he
fore, did you? The first step-the all
| important step in securing college ed
ucation-is, land at the county seat with
both feet, provided, of course, the county
seat is at Terra Alta on the MARYLAND
line No matter in what part OF the
county you live, no matter TO what
| college you are headed 90 thou TO Terra
Alta and be anointed, or your college ed
ucation will be worthless. For example.
II you live in Masontown and want 10
start your son to school in Morgantown.
be sure that you first let his feet touch
the sacred soil OF the depot at Terra Alta
on the Maryland line, else his future will
be blasted. In spirit of fairness'j to
the people Of the whole county, do this.
Isn't 1t beautiful theory? Think of
IT. And II those are not sufficient reasons.
there were Others assigned in Terra Atlas
newspaper, which will be boiled down
for You later on.
BY and by and moreover. do Won
notice that the Maryland lineV subject
IS a delicate one with Terra Alta? They
are apologizing over there already for be-
ing on the Maryland line. The news
paper aforesaid, always on the alert with
goodlO excuses, says it's no disgrace or
drawback, no injury, no fault, nobody's
10
Terra Alta is on the Maryland line. or
Whereabouts And then points with pride
To ~. Louis, Mo, near the Illinois line.
ana thereby and therefore compares the
two cities There we have been again
Woeiully ignorant. Never occurred 10 us
that Terra Alta and StaIouis were twin
cities fast forging ahead in pretty equal
race, with Terra Alta nose ahead. stick
ing into the Maryland line. So there Won
are beaten again
Bring on your county seats WbaPs
The use to stop with one? Bring en- aII.
Bring TaylOr's aud fuckers. and Mo.
nougalia's and bring Garrett countv
Nd. 's % viii only be- q few minufey
walk or tote 10 bring O.kland's new
courthouse body and bOucs' over tho
main line oi the y. d o. 81 Terra Alta.
Do it, by heck to- the st. Louis of old
Preston What IS So. Louis of Missouri
anyway? True she has the Mississipui
river, but hasn' Terra Alta Snowy creek
buckwhcat flour aud tombstone. seWers
and rcceivcrhps galore?
So here wc 20 for the main line Of the
b. d o. on The Maryland line. i'm
spirit Of fairness 30 the people Of the
whole county That's the way the
newspaper Of Terra Alta puts 10.
The foregoing are some Of the reasons
tho principal 0uce-advaucpd lac tIo
Terra Alta paper last week for the re-
mOval ~ tue county seat az 10 saws Gin
spirit % fairness and for "tlc benefit