Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1909-06-22

/ Sunday School Teacher-Did you
! ever forgive an enemy?
Tommy Tuffnut-Onst.
Sunday School Teacher-And what
noble sentiment was it that prompted
you to do it?
Tommy Tuffnut-He wuz biggern
me- Philadelphia Inquirer.
First Little Girl Your papa and
mamma are not your real parents.
They adopted YOU.
Second Little Girl-Well, that makes
1t all the more satisfactory My par
tnts picked me out, while yours had to
take you just as you came.-Liverpool
Mercury.
Harry's father was bald and one day
the little fellor, said. Papa, it
wouldn't do for you to fall asleep in
the desert. would itT'
"Why not?" asked the father
"'Cause an ostrich might sit on your
head and hatch it out" explained
Harry hicagO News
An American was boasting Of the
terrific speed at which trains travelled
u his rushing country. After telling
81 impossible story al Irishman said:
IN sure. &c you call that rapid
Why. only last week booked third
class for Dublin at Belfast an got
-here In A second London Mall.
4 Britisher was announcing his
views on things in general and sum-
med Up his own position by the state
Eent, Well I've seen life" But"
said his American friend. zone Of your
Own bright poets has said, Idfe's
JOKE The Britisher is still exploring
the remark.-New York Times.
she-what a good likeness of you
that is,
He-No, It isn't. was not feeling
well. and I looked like an idiot that
morning
She Gntently studying the photo
graph)-Well. it looks exactly like YOU
anyway.-LondnD Mail.
1t has been computed that one com
mon house fly on the Doth of March is
represented 10y 800 on the oath OF
April The 800 become 10000 by May
%, and by aug. the number has been
squared twice more making the total
progeny amount to the appalling and
incalculable number of S.100,000000.
First Passenger - Pardon me, but
would you mind lending me your spec
tacles moment?
Second Passenger-Wlth pleasure.
First Passenger - Thanks, awfully.
And now. as you can no longer read
your newspaper, would you kindly pass
1t over to me?-Harper's Weekly.
Mrs. Greene-Charles, was aston
ished at the way you devOured that
salad tonight. You know you always
said you detested salad.
Mr.. Greene-Yes. love but ! didn't
know that there was another way of
making It than yours. Boston Tran
script
Experiments show that there is an
Intimate relation between the color of
sea water and the proportion of salt
the water holds in solution, the blue
water containing much more salt than
the green water, the difference in the
two colors being entirely a matter OF
more or less brine.
Something old and something new.
something borrowed
ITO what are you alluding?",
"A brides costume"
"Oh, l thought maybe you were Civ
ing a recipe for a joke column" said
the press numorist ily.-Louisville
Courier-J ournal.
"That large man over there thinks
himself pretty important parsonage
in this place. doesn't he?" asked the
stranger.
"Important?" exclaimed the native.
why, If you tell him we're having fine
weather here he swells up as if he
thought he made IT,"
The face Of n wife shows what her
husband Is; the shirt of the husband
shows what his wife is.-Servjan Prov
erb.
Boy-Don't sit there. sir, That seat'F
broke. Testy Old Gentleman-Humph
In my young days boys had sense of
humor,-London Punch.
The origin Of the gambling device
known as the roulette wheel was the
praying wheel Of Japan. which II close
ly resembles.