The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-02-08

 ment is best fr a man what's got the complaints that troubled Ben Twister.
 "There's some gets cured with religion an some gets better fir havin' five or six whalin' big piles, pvidin they hit him in some p'tic-lar tender spot, an there's a heap on 'em t don't pear to get no benefit i'm anythin t happens 'em They gets pizener an pizener fm day to day till they just dies I'm their own mean ness.
 T reckon it d took moren piles to clean Twister out an consid'a able more'n religion to set him on the broad an narrer path t leads to bein' a decent, re- spectable citizen.
 70 course, there is ala avs a chanet O curin' or a man like that If he takes to playin' poker bein as draw poker is reeo' nized by everybody what onder- stands it as bein' the foreordained instru- ment O providence fr tn upliftin' O pore, fallen hoomanity.
 Stands to reason that a man t pla.$ draw poker intelligent gets to be broad minded enough, so 8 there aint no chanst O him bein' mean or ornery But that s just the trouble with Twister an them like him.
 They m too low down fir to set in an learn the game, an O course, CT providence in reck min on savin' of 'em at all, 1t s got to be did some other way. Biles an religion pears to be the on y two things what's strong enough fr to take holt O sich.
 "There was them t said what Ben Twister must ha' ben changed at birth, bein' as his dad was a tol able gifted poker player, an some prominent citlzen, an his marm was fine, easy-goin lady what never nagged, no matter what old man Twister done. But Ben 'peared to ben born crooked.
 want nothin suited him i'm tn start. They had to wean him inside O. a week, count O nat'ral victuals not settin' well onto his stomach. an he was that close by natur' t he wouldn't give 'em up when he onct got 'em, even if they want what he wanted.
 Not a Willing Pupil.
 "Well, he growed up just like that. Old man Twister couldn't do nothin' with him. Tried to teach him draw poker when he got big enough, but Ben lost a pot at the beginnin', an he says he reckons he aint goin' to set in at no game where he's liable fr to lose nothin.
 "When he got married he said how the preacher told 'em him an his wife was one, so he wouldn't buy rations only fir one, an Mrs. Twister nigh starved to death afore she done left him f'r good, like she done in about a month.
 "Bein' as he want good fir nothin' else, old man Twister reckoned he'd make preacher O him, an he got him a job into strugglin church nigh where they lived, but>Ben'd preach f'm the same text half dozen times hand runnin', an when they ast him if he couldn't find nothin' else to preach about he said he reckoned he could, on'y his salary want big enough fr to make it a object fir to go huntin' through Seripter f'r new text every week, an the elders says that if he feels that away about it they reck- oned the wouldn't pay him no salary at all.
 " Feared like that showed what he wa mt to be cured with religion, an when he begin havin' piles there was some said mebbe the Lord was givin' him one more chanst, but even that didn't do him no good
 They started to poultice him, and he said he reckoned he wouldn't spend no money f'r flaxseed, bein' as he hadn't or dered no piles, an he wouldn't be re- sponsible for nothin' t he hadn't ordered. Nothin' More Did. Alter that, bein. as there want noth- in more t Providence ed do. an there | want nobody else t cared a hoot about | doin' nothin' for him, there want nothin' I m to wus, steady. till te'rds the last, he died"
 Having extracted the whole of this gruesome tale from his midst and pre- sented It in the foregoing fashion to his amazed listeners, old man Greenhut se- 1ected large black cigar from his pri- vate box and. after carefully lighting if walked around to his favorite seat by the window, and placing his feet on the sill smoked in placid silence For some moments nothing was said Then Bassett said:
 Well, of all the drivelin', no count, shif'less chunks O rotten talk t I ever"
 "Sh!' interrupted Blasdel "Th' ain't no use gettin tn old man vi'lent. He's got to be coaxed. Mebbe we c'n get Jim up to Little Rock afore he turns loose. heerd there was some padded cells into tn asylum up there"
 "Oh I don't know" said MT Owen Pepper. That there story sounds to me like 1t thought mean somepin', on'y there couldn't nobody tell what Pears like 1t don't trump in, nor foller suit but tn aint no tellin'. Mebbe tn old man ain't through yet
 Well" said Jake Winterbottom pa tiently, whats the answer, Greenhut? I'll be the goat.~ Is we expected to laugh T feel sad? Kind O grope round. will ye, an see if you e'n find the key?"
 The Answer.
 "The answer is." said old man Green hut. testify, "as how that there melan- choly story O Ben Twister Is on'y just one more proof O what q wonderful plan O salvation there Is into a game O draw poker"
 wed oughter git him up there as soon's we can," said Blaisdell. anxious ly. He can't go on this way long"
 But samN Barson interposed: "Mebbe he thinks he means somepin'. Let's humor him a spell. What d that have to do with draw poker Greenhut? Pears like you sad this here Ben Twister didn't play poker.'
 "No more he did," replied the old man, 'an' that was the reason O him not never gittin the best O what troubled him. But Bill Twister played" They all shook their heads sorrowfullv at this, but after another pause the old man resumed his explanation. ''rhe way on t was this" he said. ''Ben an Bill was twins, an they was born just about the same time O the same father an mother
 Them t knowed about it at the time said there wasn't nobody cd tell 'em apart, an that's what made it tough on Bill, for to say t Ben thought a been changed at birth, bein as that d make Bill the one t was just tellin about Anyways they growed up together, like brothers does, fightin' an maxim up, an both on 'em bein' a good deal alike. Some said Bill was more so n Ben was, but others said he want no more like Ben n Ben was like him, bein hard thing to say O Bill.
 They was both on em as no count as of, kn6 hA fn ftr.,a xx,l,1