The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1909-01-05

COX so blamed funny!
Somebody had Bings place in the
Whist game when ho got wind enough
10 walk forward to the smoker, so he
sat in moody silence all the way to
the city
II was still raining when he emerged
from the suburban depot and, to add
70 his discontinue, the umbrella was
so fatally wrecked that II only
yroaned and ripped when he tried to
raise It, Finally a street car came
along and Bings climbed aboard. II
vas jammed full and everyone was
soggy and cross. a fat woman
gouged Bings in the ear with her
dripping umbrella, blonde lady
sawed his nose by whirling quickly
and striking him with the rim of one
Of those outlandish wide hats, and a
cashier in restaurant called him a
Seast because ne inadvertently
stepped on her protruding toe.
Then a fat man came in and
rowded Bings so he could scarcely
'ang onto the car strap. The fat man
iln't have change and he looked in
I II his pockets, iostling Binss woe
ully as he searched Finally he pro-
lucrd a s. bill and had that changed.
/ hen he stuck the remaining $495
his outside coat pocket and
| vas Cuiot--at last.
/ by the time BinEs got Off that car
! in front of his Office, he was hopping
mad. lie was saying all kinds of
! things about the street car manage
msnt when he reached into his over.
ccat pocket ard WIS surprised to feel
something slick and metallic, as well
as what he thought was a piece of
scrap paper. Rings felt again.
Il was money!
Bngs took ii out as he rode up in
the ele?atcr There was just $495.
In a fash he remembered the
tat mans charge and realized that
the portly gentleman had slipped the
money into his overcoat pocket by
mistake as they stood side by side in
the car,
Jones whistled bli;hely as he opened
his Office door and entered.
Morning, Miss Jones'" he chirped
chcnrily to his private secretary. "It
ma.,os fellow glad 10 be alive these
days!"
Moral--Isnt II really wonderful how
a little easy money will transform a
man?
O % o
Fancies.
Tho wise man who has money IN
the bank will not boast Of II to his
friends.
When a woman hasn't anything else
TO worry about. she begins to imagine
there are burglars about,
lf = q
A way to prove your friend is tC
try borrowing money OF HIM II yol
want to lose him, loan him money.
4 4 Z
A favorlte aunt Of mine sends me I
tom-tom for Christmas II Is an his
toric instrument. | tried II on m,
bulldog but he doesn't seem to ap
preciate music. | guess he is not 1
good Indian. Speaking of Indians, re
minds me that years ago when maI
was surrounded by Indians, he surren
dercd. Now, he buys.
q % o.
The Reaeon.
An Ohio school teachc, while rdinl
upon a train, felt something crawling II
her shirt waist, which she discovered 4
lie a mouse. She did not faint. but trie,
10 get somc OF the passengers TO reacl
In and get the intruder There was no
q man on the train who dared to taekl
the job. .-EN,
That's what woman gets for Away
having so many pin points bristling abou
her clothing,
O o o
Some Women.
An exchange says women are so polit
to their company. They meet the com
pany at the train. kiss her. quarrel abou
carrying her valise fuss about payin
lie street car fare. scream when SHE sug
gests SoiuE home and then heave a grea
sigh of relief when she does so.
Ssr.eM!.Aese~