The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-10-10


 fessor's forecast, the Koh-i-noor had been the first to fall in love with Iris at least the irst to publicly avow his passion. And he engaged to the land lady's daughter, too.
 There were a few days of tempestuous weather in the boarding house over that affair of the scented soap. Tt hurts my daughters feelings good deal'' said the landlady to the professor, that the gen. tleman she's a-keeping company with should be offerin' tickets and tryin' to send presents to them as he's never knowed till jest spell ago. That there ridiculous painteress, or whatever she is, has come to make more trouble than her boards worth" But presently the head light of the Koh-i-noor was seen gleaming out of the dark corners of the parlor beside the landladys daughter again of evenings, and as for the scented soap, Master Benjamin Franklin, the landlady's boy, picked it up and indulged in a verit- able orgy of washing and went about smelling like civet cat for weeks.
 The Koh-i-noor being disposed of, the boarding house now decided upon the Little Gentleman with the queer legs. If she aint a setting of her cap for the Little Gentleman" said the landladys daughter; "ain't she the artful?' '"There is them that would marry Lazarus if he would only pick up crumbs enough, and some of them young people is the artful- lest" said the landlady; "but I doubt if she's one of that sort after all. She seems to be kinder childish like and maybe never had any dolls to play with flor they say her folks were poor until M am undertook to see to her teachin and board and clothe her"
 As for the professor, he felt almost as much irritated at the scant notice which Iris and the young Marylander took of each other as the Model had been at Iris stubborn resistance to treading the path to an early grave. This flying in the face of prophecy seemed to be get ting a confirmed habit with Iris. The Little Gentleman sat beside Iris at the table. She smiled sometimes at his vehe- ment statements, but never laughed 1t him. When he spoke she kept her eyes steadily fixed on him, and he evidently was pleased with her attention. He began to be more careful in his dress, and the personal adornment, such as a ruffied shirtfront and a diamond pin now and then.
 In spite of his deformities the Little Gentleman had wonderfully well-shaped and ell-deve1oped left hand on one finger of which he wore a great ruby ring. He hardly could help calling at- tention to his left arm and hand, as peo- pie with one showy point are apt to do especially dentists with handsome teeth who always laugh back to the last molar. Sitting, as he does, next to the young lady, and next but one to Mabel. it la easy to see that his affection does not extend to that calm and correct lady. "That Is an admirable woman, sir" he said one day to the professor, Ian ad- mirable woman, and hate her" The professor naturally asked an explanation.
 An admirable woman," replied the Lit tie Gentleman, "because she does good things and even kind things-takes care of this-this-young lady we have here; talks like a sensible person and always
 looks as if she was doing her duty with her whole might But l hate her because her voice sounds as if it never trembled and her eyes look as if she never had known what it was to cry. Besides, she looks at me as if she wanted to get a picture of me for some gallery in her brain, and we that haye-we don't like to be looked at so. Her eyes kill me-it is lflxa heinz stabbed with icicles. I don't want a woman to weigh me in the bal ance-there are men enough for that. The
 judicial character isn't captivating in a female, sir. A woman fascinaes a man quite as much by what she over looks as by what she sees. Love prefers twilight to daylight. A man wants to couple a woman with love past- present