The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1909-08-24
Summer Ho1e/ a CLEARING
House For feminine Gossip
AIMS Adenoids and Annabes Appendicitis Interesting
Topics-Brdge and the Latest Stitch in Table
Mats-Porch Hens Galore, Who Gabbe
and Cad, Day In and Day Out
By DOLLY DALRYMPLE.

Hen thereafter whose penchant was dis
ease; but the very next morning ran into
nest of them and was, like a lamb, led
to the slaughter and introduced. You
| know how people are at summer resorts
about introducing you to every living
thing that comes within the portals. This
particular nest of hens was being RECALLED
with the conversation of a little wizened
old lady who was knitting as hard as she
could and who had never dropped stitch
in all her life. Think what she's missed,
poor thingi And was telling about Ann S
Adenoids and Tottie's tonsils being taken
out Dear lambs! How they did suffer!
And found myself holding up my skirts
almost knee high (of course this was an
excellent excuse for the Porch Hens to
talk about my silk hosiery and French
heels) as we waded through gore and
CRIME, and I came out of the blood oper-
alton a finished NJ. D., able and well
equipped to diagnose case without the
, slightest difficulty and operate, IL neces-
sary."
How remarkable" said my friend.
And then what happened?'
THE next variety of Porch Hen that l
encountered was the one who had left
home to get away from housekeeping and
as you have never heard and such long
soliloquys of My House., and My Serv-
ants and My This and That and the
Other-until l though I'D die from sheer
exhaustion"
And what about the bridge friends? p
my friend inquired
1.-THE worst of ALL" answered ANY
time the conversation languished, and
they were in doubt as to what to talk
about they talked bridge. Everybody that
knows me knows that my pose about
bridge is like Hon. John M. Aliens pose
that made him famous in Congress. He
was the only private In the late war,
and was proud of it; and am the only
person on record SO far that have ever
seen who actually delighted in the fact
and boosted of playing poor game of
bridge. But my newly acquired friends
didn't know this, ana 80 l was constantly
! asked: Now, what would you have zone,
third in hand, II you had the ace and the
/ loathed the very name of bridge"
And was there no means of escape
from these terrible hens? my friend
|, asked pitifnlly.
Dear me, no. l promptly replied. In
the evening, when there was a. tiny
breath of air stirring and the moonlight
was SO ravishingly beautiful that Tom
Moore and Byron came so easily to the
| tip of my tongue that longed to sit and
| quote them to myself, all by myself, and l
took chair and moved way down to
the end of the gallery, thinking to escape,
when, 10! and behold, brood came and
roasted near by. and this is what [
caught:
"Of course 1 couldn't keep the last
cook I had. She was simply impossible
/ Why she refused to announce dinner any
other way than by ringing huge old
dinner bell which she found in the pantry
| which had been out of commission for
years, and SO. of course, had to let her
CO.
why, it was one of the worst spells of
: old-fashioned cblic l ever saw. We nut
her feet In hit water and a mustard
plaster on her little Mary, and hot water
bottles at her lack, and when she recov.
cred she was as blue in the face as indigo
| and looked Ikea dead woman"
why l aluiys use darning cotton to
stuff the fowls with and then work It
with the reguar satin stitch; and it is not
in the least difficult"
II believe like the rouge that the big
handsome blade uses better than any
makeup haze seen at the summer resort
this year, so oppose some of US ask her
tomorrow whit brand it isl
When the so-trump was declared l. of
course, led mi highest heart, and it seems,
my dear thainy partner played the dia-
mond convenbn and she had eight dia-
monos' ana course not, one of them
TOOK trick. couldn't help 1t, but she
got furious pd hasn't spoken to me
since, although l haveNmet her face to
face In the flyer of tia hotel ever so
many times. Put how cold know she
wanted me to lead her a diauond?,
This and MICH more did ave waited
to me above tie gentle sway oithe noun
tain breezes. while the mooniist PLAYED
Enthusiastically through the branchA Of tb,,
trees.
And I sat, bound as it were, o ths
north by a hospital. on the south Nan
intelligence bureau, on the east bAa
bridge party and the west by the latt
stitch in table mats
And I went to bed, wondering If thes
subjects never grew stale to the Amalga
mated Association of Porch Hens, and
concluded that verify the ways of woma
kind are strange and mysterious and n
more to be understood even by thei
own sex, than the Mahabharata or tn
4 DR.. Elliott's Five-Foot Book Shelf