Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1909-10-09
SPEIdELMYER ON MILK


Mein Lieber Adolph: Whereas an
unvise providence has removed from
our midst der Fleet, und
Whereas, We vos under der impress
sion dot der Fleet had der bully good:
est time what dey effer had, It is here.
| by
Resolved, dot We will try und Guido
ourselves on der next visit of fleet,
no matter from what nation II comes
All nations Welcome, Carrie excepted.
Der city vos getting more as iittie
excited offer two all absorbing ques-
lions; der reorganization OFF der Re.
publican party und pure milk. don't
know more as too much about der re-
organization of der @. o. p. Maybe
dey mean rejuveting. Anyhow, 1t vas
all der same. But about der milk ques.
tion am foot and sock nit dose PEG.
pie What want milk, pure, effery.day.
three.rail.fence milk. l got me SO ex.
cited offer desc pure milk business
dot ! almost got ready to start milk
gerden myself only I cannot milk a
COW. Der only kind OF COW what
can milk iss a milk wagon. Der vas
reason for me holding up der pure
milk question und II iss desc way.
Most of der restaurants in desc city
gin der customers glass OF water der
first thing when you go In free. A few
days behind go by restaurant in
und a waiter comes by me to get my
order und I says: on you please you
viii gin me. glass OF milk und two
pretzells. In a minute a waiter comes
along and puts me down a glass Of
water on der table. Der water did
not look very clear to me und ! says,
Waiter. dot glass iss not clean. II has
had milk in It, He looked at me
minute und says Dot iss not water, dot
ISIS milk" From dot day to this | am
body und soul for pure milk efen IN
dey han to walk offer my body when
1t iss dead.
Der supershnizers put milk bill in
frame ind sent II to the Mayor to
sign II but der Mayor sent II back nit
out his name because It looked like u
Christmas tree to him nit all Its
branches loaded down nit conditions
dot would make even der coks shudder.
Der Mayor und me both believe In pure
milk und we are going to get It, but to
bring about desc happy event dere
must be short law init out any frills
or tangled up NIT side issues. 1t must
be q sort of "Kapu' Keep of der
grass" mo edmittance" law nit out
frills. Why. Adolph. der law What der
Mayor vetoed would sour der milk IN
It vast brought into der same district
NIT der cows.
Dots der way init most of der laws
\ in desc city. Dey are all too compli.
Gated. Some fellow gets up a law
dot ISIS frst-class und would All all
of her bill, den effery body what has
got anything to say comes along und
tacks on a frill or two until It looks
like How old vas Ann" to der orig.
nator OF her bill
Look at San Francisco What did
dey do when dey wanted pure milk
Dey appointed Mr.. Dockery. the one
und only Inspector of a city of 800, 900
population, to see dot der city got
pure milk. Dey gave him his test
tube und der per cent of butter FAT
each gallon off milk must contain uni
told him to go ahead. Und you Bet he
did go ahead. He vas armed NIT an
thority und police officer. He vas NJ
before daylight und stood up effery
milk wagon What camedf his way. II
der milk did not get up to his test into
der sewer It vent purity quick. 1t vas
not one week before San Francisco
had pure milk.
Neffer mind all of der side frlll oh
testing der cows und der calls unt
all dot When der dairyman cant gel
his milk by der inspector. he will al
tend to all of dot side business. Al
5 der city has got to do Is to push DEF
= pure milk button und der milk produc
er Will do der rest
Der green.eyed monster has taker
possession Of me. AdOlph. ! am jeal
Gus. Dere vas somebody else In dest
beautiful city who vas writing poetry
Der production of her pen vas In he
Evening paper (of course dot iss de-
= Evening Bulletin last Satur
day, und It vas about baby what mus
be worth going miles to see according
to der embellishments as Is wrot'
about by der one who wrote de
poetry; dot ISIS II 1t vas not like SOM
on der tailor advertisements about dc
fit dey gin you In suit on clothes
Dere are several kinds OF; fits a maj
might get into bu: der tai!nrs are par
ticular not to say which kind a
der suits will giff you und you mus
find 1t out by experience.
But dot baby What der poetry va