The Montgomery advertiser. [volume] (Montgomery, Ala.) 1885-1982, 1909-08-11
DRIFTWOoD

DRIFTWOOD
A summer resort is that mysterious
bourne from which no traveller ever
returns without being broke.
| They speak Of this as free eoun-
sac.d IN Nelson sss w. y alareS sna Theodore
Roosevelt.
The most awful calamity that could
befAll the old maid fanatic and the
clerical extremist would be to die and
discover that after all these years 81
effort there was no hell!
Docs she 20 in much for local col
well. I should say Sober pepper
keeps drugstore
Miss Youngthing-Now. honestly.
Mr.. Bacheior-Real Hair!
| When q woman tries to be logical
she loses one Of her sweetest eharae'
1t is rurnored that Walt weilman IL
about to get ready to prepare to start
for the pole again.
Paw. what is a sreen-srass wild
my son. there is no such thing
widow Is never green
Well, what's the good Of Kicking
as long as the ocean hasn't gone dry
and there are pretty bathing girls TO
lock upon. life isn't quite dreary
waste.
Advice Is just like medicineA-easy
| to give but mean t? take. and when
to take it one Is always more or less
dubious Of the result.
The average man is o-facee--one
family. while the other face. entirely
Inherent. he reserves for his friends at
the club.
a! was a fool when married you.'
said Montgomery man yesterday.
But you do not seem to have i'm.
proved any by the association" replied
his wife. sArcastically. but then some
cases are hopeless"
The dressmaker is hardly considered
In the light Of a 1uggler yet she con-
stantiy jugsles with figures. :
The man Of today is compelled 10
cultivate o domestic taste. "a 1. il
nearly always a domestic who pre-
pares ms 1000 Ior niW
Some write for money.
Some write for fame.
But the average man writes
Just to sec his name
r
Let US hope that senator Alirich |
VIII not expect to have his summer
hotel bills revised downward.
John Temple Graves says. ito love
a widow 10 q liberal education" And
the tuition 10 certainly dear we would
Alabama is 100 per cent. dryer than
pulverized moonshinA. powdered SUI
gar. and seed diamonds. Please turn
on the hose!
Harry Thaw. upon his liberation,
will go to Fittsburk and enter upon a
literary career. II any doubts ever
existed in the popular mind as to TIE
young mans insanity this will at cnce
dispel them.
It 10 said that the coming season
will be brilliant one for Bridge clubs.
Poor bubbles, who will thus he forced
we extend you tine full sympathy Of
our Overlooking bacheleric heart
Mr., Taft lends his hearty approval
to the .airship. knowing fIll well that
his sebacfous carcass will never be
expected to go UP in one Of the oesky
contrivances.
Uncle Joe Cannon says that 50 cent
underwear 10 good enough for him.
We are of the opinion that rs cent
underwear ui Is even E""e enough Tor
Song OF the tariff orators: II love
my Washington but. oh you chautau-
qua!"
It's not Teddy. but the p"er married
constantly "dig-dig"
Phil Armstrong has been very
In his e1loSies Of the Montgomery
blonde, but since the death knell tc |
the locker club and almost beer Joints, |
whsss wssrs; rim Ttm.a he get his In
Far From Town.
Far away--so mewhere--from town
Where the blue, blue sky, IL bending
Where wind blows cross the ripping
And clover blossoms smell so sweet,
Where the crow swings by with his
And the bob white calls from the mea-
Where Laughing ripping brooks run
And minnows flash in the sun and
are gone.
Where the old mill-wheel so lazy
turns.
To wade in the cool stream how one
yearns
To plunge in that old swimming hole.
While paradise seeps through your
soul.
oh. take me back and let me be
A barefoot kid with my heart as
free
AS the sun and wind and sky and
air.
And the world was mind and I
didn't care
For the things that set US mad to-
day
The clink Of gold and worii-mad
fray
The world was sweet-no sin and
strife
Far, far from town--and that was
life!
p H. A.