The Democratic advocate., 1909-05-14
WORaR'S SSeRseOf HaIROr

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Any man who thinks woman has
no sense OF humor" said Uncle Henry.
unlimbering about four dollars worth
Of complicated gestures, deserves to
be--say any man who Is 80 bald
headed on the inside as to suppose
that women don't know a Joke when
they see IL deserves 20 be---well. son.
my gracious, he deserves 10 be mar
ried. And that's all there Is to it.
Did you sec this? Did you read
this in the papers7 BY gum, It's a
corker Listen here.
A young idiot goes and enlists In
the navy. They give him some blue
clothes and a black eye, a slop bucket
and a light breakfast, and set him to
work improving the complexion of
the starboard watch ahoy. Say, he
was sore all over.
Had a girl ashore, too. Fact Is,
she put him up to Il. Well, sir, he
was In and be couldn't get out. So
he manlcured the brass work, learned
to say 'Yessir' and 'Nosir, and click
his heels and salute every time any
gold braid came along, and after
awhile his time was MP.
Then listen. No more discipline. +
he says No more bowing and scrap
Ing he says. No more being afraid
70 call your soul your own be SAYS.
Not with the girl sn shore ready 10
marry me, he says. I'm Though
with discipline and backing water for
life. be says. And he skiddoed right
out OF the navy like he was almost
human.
Then, by gracious. what does he
dog Well, SIR, BY gum, he goes right
on and marries the girl. Think II
over. son: take II easy and get the
meat out OF H. That's right, 20
ahead and laugh Honest, can you
beat it7
Goes right home, he does. right out
OF the navy. and marrfes the girl.
Never waited TO get the crick out Of
HIS back even. Tired Of discipline.
he was. And he goes right on and
gets married, Wanted chance 70
call his soutd his own, he did. And
as soon MS he gets living show he
beats right out and becomes q hns.
band. Regular husband, BY gracious.
and before that be was only sailor
But the girl. son: the girl Wasn't
she the goodsg Can you soc itg Does
it yet 20 you, the whole husineasg
There she was. fast an ordinary
sort OF female woman girl person
Nothing extra. understand, Hike as
though she was bigger than be was.
or could throw straight. or anything
No. Sit, regular straight average girl
+ And there he Was. High aud
mighty sort Of male man. Used to
90 out with the boys and come back
with the kaiEeniamIner. stood np
straight and looked 'em over. Regular
unmarried sort Of Eny. Wouldn't
take nothing from nobody
Now see, pipe the foxy aoaslc.
She waa over seven What chance
would she stand with hIm7 Nix. So
what does She dos She pumps him
fun Of salt water literature, She
hands him over 20 the uyrmidona 81
the quarterback and ieta them boat
the fear that ccfneih with UNDER
standing into him with a i6-lnch gun.
Say. SON u waa grand
Then she waits for him 10 come
out. nfiua as be pimnRca over 10 her
little cottage door And when hs says
'Wnl your she gets red ia the face
trying TO frame up you betcher lifci'
IN some more modest and retiring
sort OF language.
Would aheg Would she be hisg
Would Eho7 Holy hopping hoop
skirts. what Ia the name Uf senses had
she been training him fort Would
ahe be htag in a minute " she had
not already decided that he was going
10 be hers And. Hay. son. what chance
has q man got against game like
that7
by gracious. you goi 10 give her
credit You got u give EN- all credit
They're wise son. they're wise They
80 out 10 tea Fights aud bargain matt
neen Of an afternoon and all thene
like butter wouldn't melt IN their
mouths Along comes one Of ua mere
men with pair Of sgueaky patent
feathers and a weeks pay In his kick
and he looks In at 'em and he says 10
himself There's a nice. quiet, tame
innocent looking bunch For two
cents ia 90 Ia and give 'om look.
And all the time the Girl nearest
the window II saying to The petite
lamb alongside: There's a big hulk
of nothing with face like pan Of
stale fudge piping as through tho
window. Shall We make him como
in and tie few knots 10 him7 No.
saya mothers ownert lamb. putting
on aick-duck- -n-thundcrstoriB
expression Let's wait until the car
Rmels are gone, and then we'll go out
and throw the hooks into couple
Of live ones.
Honest, son. what chance in this
wide.w woridhaA a poor.undeiense-
lesa critter like man IL until some
body wakes him up from his dream
got with a frAme-up like that7 Say. he
hasn't got any more show than I have
when my wife gets going. Only
know enough 20 beat It before II De-
gins TO thunder That's experience.
that's what that Is. and experience
doesn't come IN box like crackers
And that's Why say any man who
thinks a woman has no sense Of hui
NOR Ia liable 10 have some girl come
along amy day and marry him up. and
then where "a he7 He knows more
but Il doesn't do him any good.
Yes, indeed. son. there's no doubt
about II, woman knows d Joke when
she sees Il. OF course you tell her
Joke and she won't laugh nor moth
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