The Brandon news. (Brandon, Miss.) 1892-1961, 1909-07-22

ly of Climax, Ca, is a very great,
but. alas, mo longer an undiscovered
humorist. Mr.. Oliver walked into
Climax one night not long ago with
out a penny in his pocket. The NEXT
day he had bought CltmaX's only
bank. After that heN bought chain
of other banks; industries by the Coz.
en-. acres and acres of timber lands,
automobiles by the score, and dEa-
monds by the hundreds. He gave
away the automobiles almost as fast
as he bought them. Likewise the dta-
monds. Everybody put their money
into the generous" Mr. DIVERS en-
terprises.
"Ah, WILL" he unused one day, ~
seem to have everything i'm sight
worth having.
Pretty little Rose English, the VIII
lage belle, tripped across his kerr
''Except"-he murmured. Except
Soon after he had won the villlge
belle under the noses of a dozen
suitors. That was where Mr.. Oliver
forgot the teachings of the phflcso-
pliers. There is no humor i'm love.
The village bellies most determined
SWAIN threw Gtrmsef On the capital
lists trail.
''Aha!" he said. "Aha.!"
'Aha!" he repeated a bit later.
William, l have ye."
Being also in love he had 10 sl3rGs
of numor to weaken him, and ihe was
quite right, he did have MIR. Oliver.
You see, the joke was that Mr.
Oliver never had a cent. He wcs
Just an escaped convict with a f-rlan-
cier's brain. By the simple eXpeldl-
ent CT leaving lying about bank
book that seemed to record the depCs
it of some $4,000 in a New York
bank he had made himself owrlar CT
all Climax and half the surrounding
country.
Climax is a nice little town down
i'm Georgia. 1t has streets and a post
office and a bank, and planters come
there and sit around and talk. Into
Climax enc might last january a
well-groomed, portly stranger walked.
At least he walked off the train.
Mr.. oliver Arrives.
81 like this town." he comfided to
jim Beacon, who drives the army
mules that draw the ancient hack
of the Hotel Georgia, the st. Regis
of Climax.
Mr.. Oliver next day was UP bright
and early. He called at the Climax
Bank, discoursed at length of the
new era that had set in for Climax
with his advent, and as he left the
presidents office carelessly left
handbook upon the table. The pres
Ident, fascinated by the capitalist,
ushered him ito the door. A messen-
ger entering the room saw the bank
book. 1t magically fell open ion his
hand.
Good Lawd," said the messenger,
IAN there that much money in the
world?"
A clerk walking in found him gaz-
ing spell-bound at the little volume.
He looked and sank into a trance
also. The president, entering found
them both staring. He looked and
fell into the same state of coma.
What had produced these strange
symptoms was little row of hyp-
MOTTO figures on the page. These
seemed to show THAT Mr.. Oliver had
exactly $4,S75, 594.37 at a New York
bank. A great and awe-stricken
hush fell upon Climax ais soDm as the
news leaked out, and through this
silence, Mr.. A. d. Oliver strobe to-
ward his destiny like Napoleon
1T WAS 1uU5 uGAI Udy IHuI WI. VI
liver, with many apologies for his
carelessness, recovered his bank
book and made proposals to- buy the
Climax bank He was generous a.
bout his figures. He only stipulated
that he should have possession at
once. What could one say to a man
who had $4,S75, 594.37 i'm New York?
Mr.. Oliver got the bank He gave
check for it, Then he went right
into his new possession. Went
right into lis happy phrase. In the
same mail that bore the check with
which he had bought the bank went
another certified by the cashier. for
am amount a little larger. The de
positcrs paid that, but they didn't
know it. That was the first joke
ON Climax
Distributes Automobiles.
Banker Oliver expanded hts chest
a little more and walked the streets
A