davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14
Wit of the Youngsters


II know why women laugh in their
Sleeves" said little Elmer. "Why,
dear?" asked his mother. Because
that's where their funny bone is"
Teacher-Harry, can you explain the
difference between "ayes" and ''noesY
Harry-Yes, ma am. You see with
your eyes and smell with your nose.
Small Mabel was very restless the
other night, and was unable to go to
sleep. Finally she said: Papa, please
sing to me; that always makes me
tired"
Teacher-How many zones are there?
Small Boy-Six. Teacher--No, there
are but five. However, you may name
six-if you can. Small Bay-Torrid,
north temperate, south temperate, north
frigid, south frigid and ozone.
Mamma Tin pantry has been
drinking the milk, Johnny? Tell the
truth now! Johnny-It was me, man.
ma; 1 wanted to see If it was sour.
Mamma-Well, suppose it had been?
Johnny-Why, wouldn't have drank
1t.
Little Nell-What does your papa
do? Little Bess-He's a horse doctor.
Little Nell-Then l guess I'd better
not play with you; I'm afraid you
don't belong to our set. Little Bess-I
don't see why. What does your papa
do? Little Nell-He's veterinary sur
geon!
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

A woman who can fun" In the face
Of uncertainties has been discovered
by the New York Sun.
She had telephone in her apart
ment and called up the telephone COM
pany and asked that the service be
discontinued.
I'VE are sorry to lose you," said the
man who took her message Are you
dissatisfied with anything?"
~ am." said the woman, emphatic
ally.
Il am very sorry" said the man.
Perhaps we can help you. What is
II you do not likei"
Single blessedness," said the wo.
man. Il am going to be married %
morrow"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

How Wasps Preserve Fresh Mea,.
That remarkably self-sufficient in
sect the huntress wasp, knew how to
preserve fresh meat for the use of her
children long before man invented his
canning processes, THE huntress
wasps" capture spiders, administer to
them an anesthetic sting that leaves
them alive but unconscious for q peri
od of about two weeks, and then
"cans" them In the tubular cell where
she deposits her eggs. The preserved
spider lives just long enough to fur
nish fresh meat to the young wasps
These mother wasps are not only
skilled In the arts and sciences, but
are most valiant hunters. Even the
dreaded tarantula succumbs In fear
to wasp of a large and handsome
species known as tarantula killers.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14
Blind stagger..

The Louisiana Experiment Station
has been studying blind staggers in
horses, its cause and cure. But moth
ing definite could be found. 1t is their
opinion that the cause of the disease
is in some way associated with the con-
ditiors OF the feeding materials, such
as grass, or cured products OF corn,
brought about by the attacks OF mold
or fungus.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

ator, who can easily
shake the digger after he has taken up
a quantity Of the soil and vegetable. In
construction the digger resembles a
miniature wheelbarrow, the receptacle
forming the body being made of sheet
metal containing innumerable perfora-
tions. At the front or small end of
the receptacle is a swinging door, be-
meath which is a small shovel. In op-
GRAFTON the digger is used as a shovel
in lifting the vegetable and the sur
rounding soil. The digger is then
shaken, separating the vegetable from
the soil, and allowing the latter to pass
out through the perfora tions.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

tHe ConlElVdnce De-
ing to catch up onions
and similar vegeta-
bles and the neces-
sarily accompanying
dirt and by slight.
shaking separate the
dirt from the vege-
table. 1t can readily
be carried in the
hands of the oper-
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

IhlS SuppOSluOn Is
natural, inasmuch as
so many eggs Of
questionable purity
reach the dinner ia
BILE. If the dealer
d e sired he could
readily discard eggs
of doubtful age, as
there are numerous
devices for testing
them. One of the
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

"See here" said the tailor, as he
headed the young man off, do you
cross the street every time you see me
to keep from paying the bill you owe
meT II should say not" replied the
young man. Then why do you do itY'
asked the knight of the tape. ITO keep
you from asking for it" answered the
other.-Chicago Daily News
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

Another thing which makes Q
Kicker disagreeable, is that he Is usu.
ally proud of it
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

The average person evidently imag-
ines that it is impossible for the dealer
to distinguish bad eggs and good eggs
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

Something new and novel in the way
Of vegetable diggers has been devised
by a Kentucky farmer, the object of
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1909-05-14

Some people would rather attend o
trial at the court house than a circus
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
BETTING PROBLEM IN FRANCE
Attempts to Put BOOkmakers Out of
Business for Benefit of
Government.

PARIS, May IA new phase of the
betting problem has come up in France.
Some eighteen years ago the government
discovered that betting on horse races was
immoral and forbade it by law. 1t was inn
mediately found that without betting no
body went to the races, and horse breed
ing, an important matter in a country that
needs cavalry, began to suffer. So the
paris mutuels system was introduced and
the government received a percentage Of
all money wagered to spend on public
works.
Bookmakers were thus eliminated, as a
paragraph of the law said that whoever
shall in any place or form practice betting
by offering bets to all corners" shall be
liable to certain severe penalties.
This law was intended to make it pos
sible for two individuals to make a bet
together. War was waged successfully on
professional bcokmakers and their business
was practically killed, But during the last
two or three years it has revived. Prosecu-
tions for betting have failed. the book
makers pleading that they did not accept
them from "all Corners" but only from
people they knew personally.
The failure of two or three test cases of
this kind so encouraged bookmaking that
the government found that last year its
percentage from the paris mutuels was
100000 less than for 1907, and that for the
first three months of this year the deficit
is nearly $i,300,OOO as compared with 1903.
NJ. Ruan, the minister for agriculture, has
therefore drawn up a new regulation,
which is practically certain to become law,
in which he has eliminated the words ito
all Corners" and which reads: whoever
shall have habitually, in any place or form,
offered, given or received bets on horse
races shall be liable to the penalties of
article 40 Of the penal code"
The penalties are imprisonment for at
least two or at most six months. with a
fine from $50 to 81 Zoo. The lawyers are
now looking forward to test cases on the
meaning of 'habitually."
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
ROW OF FARMERS WIVES
What 1t Means to Quit the Farm,
Move to Town and "Take
Things Easy"

Farmer who retire and move to town
are more reckless of their neglect of fresh
air and exercise than city men. City men,
with their golf and other forms of outdoor
amusement, manage to make their play
help their bodies. They are constantly the
recipients of free advice. What city man
has not been warned of the advantages of
cold baths, of suitable clothing, of sleeping
with the window open, of temperate eating,
and of exercise in the open air? But the
poor retired farmer, with a fat bank ac-
count and nothing to do, is often a vic
tim of the prosperity which takes him
away from his work and places him in a
community where he has nothing to do.
He sits around the house, plays cards with
his cronies and eats more than he can
stand without the physical labor to which
he has been accustomed. The general truth
of this statement holds in thousands of
small towns throughout the great middle
west, especially. The women folks'-par-
ticularly the wives-are not so often VIC
Tins of the easier life OF the town after
the rough work of the farm. This Is be-
cause they usually continue to do their
own homework, thus keeping up a whole
some amount of exercise. a Wisconsin
farmer, g. years of age, told us the other
day how he retired from the farm twenty
years ago, and how he came to continue
the physical exercise which keeps him in
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

president of the United States and, with
the possible exception of 1896, more states
were classed as fighting ground than in
any other campaign. For such a long line
of battle an extensive and expensive equip
ment is required to sustain the army Of
combatants and push the fight. While a
great deal of illegitimate outlay in the ma
ture Of graft and extravaganza has been
cut off, other legitimate drafts on the cam
paign treasury nave been acquired. The
railroads are no longer permitted to fur
nish free passes to political emissaries and
political s~pellbinders, nor are special trains
to be had for the asking. The item of ex-
pense for railway fare and train service
for candidates and orators alone foots up
into the hundreds of thousands of dollars
for each committee. The railroads have
been decidedly the gamers by the laws
that nave stopped free transportation and
the sentiment that has at the same time
frowned down corporation contributions TO
party treasures.
That all these changes are in the direc-
ton of Improvement in campaign methods
making for political honesty and for a
higher level Of political morality. The cam
paign of the future may. and doubtless
will, show still further improvement, 1t
is a safe assertion that there will be no
retrograde movement, and that never again
will we go back in this country to the
wide-open, go-as-you-please, h~elp-yourself.
hit-or-miss system of handling a presiden-
tial campaign in the name of any great
political party.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

good condition. 1t was a country editor In
Iowa, who happened to give him the right
advice at the right time. He had lust
moved into town, and turned the farm
over to his son-in-law, when he CHANGED
10 visit the editor, who was an old friend.
Here is what the editor said to him:
You are 40 now, Charlie, and you have
moved into town to take 1t easy and have
a good time. Well. I'll give you from two
to four years to live. l have lived In this
one place for thirty-five years, and I have
seen a perfect stream of prosperous farm
ers retire, move to town, and then die
quickly. Their average life after they
leave off work is about thirty years. This
is not guesswork. II is a calculation I have
made from facts which I have collected"
This scared Charley. So he kept at the
woodpile and the garden and the pump.
1t isn't easy to do work you don't have
to do, especially in bad weather. After
the generalizations already indicated, we
called for more specific information from
Charley's own town "a beautiful little
place of 1000 population located in the
center of a rich farming district in Wis
consin). "All right he said, Tets have
a pencil and a sheet of paper" Then he
took the main street of his town, which is
Inhabited chiefly by well-to-do retired
farmers, and began to make a list Of the
widows. The significance of this numer
ton was somewhat startling. There were
twenty-seven. or, in other words, over half
of the houses on that street were occupied
by the widows of retired s.-Collier's
Weekly. .
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

been. Her health is a real care to him,
any wish she may express is his law. But
like most OF the other Processes descended
from Queen Victoria OF England she has
practically no Intellectual interests and
little mental vigor. The fact that she is In
a position Of unparalleled power and OPP
portunity to affect the government Of mil
lions of her fellow creatures has simply
never occurred to her. Her range of in
terest is limited to her family and house
hold, and for the rest she has the artistic
accomplishments Of a moderately gifted
gentlewoman. She hates the struggle Of
politics. At the Winter Palace in st. Peters
burg on the day of the opening Of the first
Duma she delayed the luncheon to the
great personages Of the empire for half an
hour while she wept bitter tears of out
ragged dignity at what she thought the
brutal ill-breedlng of the revolutionary ma
jority Of the Duma in not bowling In re-
sponse to the salutations from the throne.
CEarinn's Life Gloomy.
There are, however, outstanding facts in
her life that have greatly deepened her
natural seriousness. Her three elder sis
ters-Princess Louis Of Battenberg and
Princess Henry of Prussia Cboth with genial
sailor husbands), and the Grand Duchess
Elizabeth, widow Of the murdered Grand
Duke Serge-made far less brilliant matches
than she, but how much more Of the sun
shine Of the world is theirs!
In the delicate matter Of marital pro-
priety among the member of her hus-
bands family the czarina is out Of SYM
pathy with the sentiment alike of the Rus
sian masses and of the ruling families.
Most of the grand dukes and a considerable
portion Of Russia's public men maintain
or have maintained publicly their NOR.
ganatic alliances, and 1t never occurs to
the Slav mind to give the subject a thought
1t is not that opinion is immoral: rather II
is non-fnoral. To this the czarina cannot
reconcile herself. The widespread resent.
ment felt among officers of both navy and
army when she secured the expulsion OF
her husbands cousin, the Grand Duke
Cyril, from the navy for marrying the d.
vorced wife of her brother, the duke OF
Hesse, has not died down yet, although
Cyril has been reinstated. 1t is an episode
that has confirmed the czarina in her will
to live strictly within the limits of heI
family circle and private friends. tacitly
ignoring the call to her to take up some OF
h have hitherto been considered the
public duties of an enthroned empress.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

Bullets
Golden Oak Buffet, top 2Ox46inch, glass 16x2 2-inch,
two enclosed cabinets on top, price ........ 2 90
Golden Oak Buffet top 20X50-inch, glass 14x44-inch,
three shelves on top, price .............. .S45. 90
Golden Oak Buffet, top 1Sx44-inch, two mirrors, 3S-inch
long, plate glass cabinet top, price. ........ a 90
Fumed Oak Buffet top 22x4S-inch, mirror 1Ox40-inch.,
one shelf, mission design, price ........... .S4S.SO
Fumed Oak Buffet, top 22x4S-inch., mirror %10x40inch,
shelf, mission design, price. ,......... .OO
Early English Buffet, top 19X4S-inchr mirror, 6X44-inch,
three drawers, two cupboards, price. 80. .S29OO
Early English Buffet, top 19x47inch, mirror 1Ox40.
loaded glass doors $40. 90
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
Dining Chairs

GOLDEN Oak Dining Chair genuife leather G
Golden Oak Dining Chair, genuine leather
Golden Oak Dining Chairs, cane under
genuine leather. box seat, price $500
Golden Oak Dining Chair, solid wood
seat, price ...... SAYS
Golden Oak Dining Chair, wood seat and
cane back, price .......... ...... S1.85
Golden Oak Dining Chair, leather seat
and back, price ........ ......... $500
Golden Oak Dining Chair, cane under
genuine leather seat ............ $500
Golden oak Dining Chair, cane seat
under genuine leather seat ........ $3.75
Golden Oak Dining Chair, slip leather
Golden Oak Dining Chair, spring leather
seat, price ........ ........S 5.25
Early English Dining Chair, slip leather
Weathered Oak, leather seat dining chair,
price .......... ............ 49,. $3.50
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
DUTCH PRINCESS is NAMED
Condition of Queen Mother and
Daughter Is Reported ~
satisfactory

THE HAGUE. May 1.-The condition Of
Queen W~ilhelmina, who yesterday gave
birth to a daughter, and the infant princess
today is thoroughly satisfactory. The
princess has been named Julian Louise
Emma Marie Wilhelmina.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
China Cabinets

CHARTERED Golden Oak China Cabinet, like
illustration, swell front and swell ends,
four shelves, claw feet front and back,
81 inches high, as inches long $4,000
Early English China Cabinet. So inches
high, 3S inches long, ! mirror over top
Early English China Cabinet, 81 inches
high. SO inches long, 1 mirror over top
Shelt, price .,..... ...... .S51s5O
Fumed Oak China Cabinet, 81 inches high,
AZ inches long. mission design. $500
Fumed Oak China Cabinet, 70 inches high,
a. inches long, loaded glass in doors,
Golden Oak China Cabinet. SO inches high.
35 inches long, l mirror, square design.
Golden Oak China Cabinet, sc inches high,
3S inches long, 4 shelves and l mirror.
Golden Oak China Cabinet, SO inches high,
81 inches long, Z shelves, and l mir
Golden Oak china Cabinet, 81 inches hish,
SO inches long. loaded glass door. ] mir
ror, price $4,000 '.'' '~A1'oO
Satin Walnut China Cabinet. "a inches
high, A inches long l mirror, . $4,000
Golden Oak China Cabinet, ~ inches high.
3S inchos long. l mirror on top. $4,000
Golden Oak China Cabinet, IS inches high,
40 inches long, square design $4,000
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

"I had that tired feeling and when I got up
in the morning it appeared as though l had had
no sleep. My system was all run down. Hoods
Sarsaparlla was Recommended for these symp-
toms and l began taking it. Since taking two
bottles 1 am entirely well. l can now do in a few
hours the work that formerly required all day.
/ cannot speak too highly of Hoods" Martin
Kemp, Union Stock Yard Hotel, Cleveland, Ohio.
ErHood's Sarsaparilla effects its wonderful
cures, not simply because it contains sarsaparilla,
but because it combines the utmost remedial
values of more than 20 different ingredients, each
greatly strengthened and enriched by this pecu-
liar combination. These ingredients are the very
remedies that successful physicians prescribe for
the same diseases and ailments. There is no real
substitute for Hoods Sarsaparilla. If urged to
buy any preparation said to be "just as good"
you may be sure it is inferior, costs less to make,
and yields the dealer a larger profit.
Begin taking Hoods Sarsaparilla today, In
usual liquid or tablets known as Sarsatabs.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02

1t is not an "honest tired feeling" which is
produced by work and relieved by rest.
1t is a tired feeling that has absolutely moth
ing to do with mental or physical e~xertiOn, and
makes a constant burden of itself.
You go to bed with it and get up with it.
1t is common in the spring or on the return of
warm weather, and is a warning which only the
hazardous fail to heed.
1t is due to an impure, impoverished or de-
vitalized condition of the blood.
Hoods Sarsaparilla is the specific remedy
for it, because this great medicine purifes, en-
riches and vitalizes the blood.
Thousands know by experience annually that
Hoods Sarsaparilla completely and permanently
removes that tired feeling, gives new life, new
courage, strength and animation.
Begin taking Hoods at once. 1t is no trouble
TO take it-OnlV three doses a day.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
That Tired Feeling and
Those Little Soldiers

There is probably no better indication that those
Little Soldiers" in your blood the white cor
puscles-are deficient in health and strength and
may fail to defend your body against disease
germs, than "that tired feeling"
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
Bullets

CHARTERED Golden Oak Buffet, like illustration, swell
front, claw foot, AZ inches long, 20 inches deep. with
12x4O inch. French plate mirror, large cupboard and
large linen drawer two small drawers, price. S34.5O
Golden Oak Buffet, top 20x42-inch, glass 12x40-inch.,
claw FOOT, price S34.OU
Golden Oak Buffet, top 1Sx40inch. glass 10x36-inch,
French legs, price = 90
Golden Oak Buffet, top 20x44-inch., glass 14x4O-inch..
Golden Oak Buffet top 20x42inch. glass 12x37-inch.,
shelf above glass, price .............. 90
Golden Oak Buffet, top 22x44-inch, glass 14x32-inch,
side shelves, price
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
Great Sale
Lace Curtains
This Week

Importers surplus stock closed out at
SOC on the dollar. Don't miss this oppor-
tunity to secure lace curtains at half price.
Omaha daily bee., 1909-05-02
Dining Tables

CHARTERED Golden Oak Extension
Table, like illustration. 45-inch
round top. heavy round pedestal
base with large claw feet, SIT. ex-
d. tension, price. ............. $500
Fumed Oak Extension Table, 5O-inch
round top, loft. extension. mission
design, price .............. $500
Fumed Oak Extension Table, 5O-inch
round top, loft extension, mi sion
center, price ............. .$45.0o
Early English Extension Table. "a
inch round top, SIT. extension. ped
estal center, price. ...... $4,000
Early English Extension Table 49,
inch. round top, SIT. extension. ped
estal center, price ........ $3.50
Golden Oak Extension Table. 45-inch.
round top, eft. solid PEDESTAL, S2l.50
Golden Oak Extension Table. 45-inch.
round top, eft. extension. solid ped
estal, price $3.50
Golden Oak Extension Table. 6O-inch.
round top, SIT. extension. pedes-
tai center, price. ......... $4,000
Gilden Oak Extension Table. 54-inch.
round top, SIT. extension. pedestal
center, price ............. $3.50
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1909-05-19
INSURANCE COMPANIES SUED

Pawhuska, Okla, May 10. Suits
agereratIne $1,000 heye been nied 10
the district court against lhe Trayn
elers Insurance company. the knights
and Ladies' Of Security and the
Great Western Life Insurance com
pany seeking TO collect The policies
held In those companies BY W. X.
McCracken, who was drowned IA the
Arkansas river last August
Mecracken mysterlousls disappear
Cd from home and q few days later
II sas reported That he had been
drowned The body wns recovered
bat the insurance companies ans
paetcd guieIde
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1909-05-19

Shrink NJ Moran. George L. Davis
and K a. Atkins
John s. Burger, Of Blackwell lisa.
Guthrie visitor, -
fudge /. b. A. Robertson, of
Chandler. was Guthrie visitor be
tween lrans to-day a-
Fred w Green retufaed this morn.
Ing from trip TO TishomlnEQ.
State School Superintendent e. y.
Cameron left this morning for Chick
ashq to attend n meeting Of the board
Of regents Of the Girls Industrial
school
r. @. Glover IS IN Ponea City
Former Councilman J. s. Lyon Is
up from Oklahoma city on business
tlp.
r. e. Overloa returned this morp.
Ing from Oklahoma City
Senator Harper Cunningham return.
ca this morning from Oklahoma CITY,
Seth Gordon has returned rom 4
state trip,
~-~=-s ..s~.asss'-r
Sam Hoover Of Oklahoma city Il
IA Guthsle visitor.
Representative Emil Il. sapp, os
lawton, Is Guthrie visitor
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1909-05-19
WILL RESTORE HIGH
Wages IN STEEL PLANTS

piilshurg. May ~Anndihrdmehl
was maize here to-day that $1,000
employees Of iron and steel companies
having headquarters In this vicinity
viii receive an advance In wages
averaging 10 per cent the first OF
June Or the first nf July
The United States Steel corpora
iInn las made 10 announcements uf
al Increase III Waees. but II Ii aali
Tao .Ienea I.auehIlu steel company.
the Republic Iron & Steel company
and other independent concerns
wes'd restore ihe wages paid prl7f
tn lhe iirnl IF Iasl April
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1909-05-19

y Among the !
Local Stores ;
n &c

Miss Leola Brewer. Of The f. q,
l.uIa dry goods store, Is AMONG the
silk today.
Il ~
Miss Kitty saflain Of the Brown
dry goods stprc. has q severe s2fe
Throat, aud lsinot al the store iolNy
Mr.. seymour. who Is to be assoel
atcd VITA tho r. o. l.ulz dry geoda
company. mas been here twn days
and up to now has been unable u
find house IN which to live.
The finest strawberries yon ever
saw. nnd home grown, at j. Il Rncks