davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
BEFORE THE BOMB

OAID the pro-vice Republican paper
- yesterday morning in the innocence
~ of her heart:
"All the bipartisan councilmen
but one voted for the confirmation of
Edward Kern. and the one exception
did not vote at ALL was not present at
the council meeting when the confirma-
ton was acted upon. If these
councilmen, many of them nom
partisans, were ignorant of any just
cause why Edward Kern should be
denied this place, why is the mayor so
censurable? If he was derelict in
making the appointment, why are not
the councilmen equally so in voting
for his confirmation? If The mayor
deserves to be deprived of his office
for the appointment of Edward Kern.
why shall not these councilmen, all
eight of them, be visited with the recall,
too? We pause for a reply"
And just then the bomb burst.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
LIBERALISM

MO ONE can dispute the fact of
" The Herald's liberality and toll
~ erance in matters of opinion or
of thought, therefore we cannot be
called "prejudiced" if we call attention
to the utter unreasonab leness of some
of the demands of the Los Angeles
Liberal club, the purpose of which is
said to be "to disseminate truth, en-
tighten ignorance and dissipate super
stiton."
Look at No. of the platform of this
organizations 1--WE demand that the
employment of chaplairs in congress-
in the legislatures, in the navy and
militia, and all other Institutions sup
ported by the public money shall be
discontinued"
To deprive a sick or a condemned
person of the comforting ministrations
of the chapla' would be to add misery
to many a sickness and to make many
a punishment cruel and unusual.
I'VE demand that all religious serv-
ices now sustained by the government
shall be abolished, and especially that
the use of the Bible in the public
schools, whether ostensibly as text
book or aVowedly as book of religious
worship, shall be prohibited"
This demand is founded on ignorance
of an important educational fact. Every
language must have standard, other
wise it will disintegrate and become
chaotic. The translation of the Bible
is the keystone of the arch of the liter
ature of the American or English Ian
guage. 1t would be an outrage to sup
press the general use of the Bible. The
Biblical style is SO inimitably and SUI
perbly excellent in it's mastery SIM
plicity that to sacrifice it to Ignorance
or prejudice would be to commit most
despicable, unwarranted and outrageous
attack upon the LITERARY LIBER-
TIES of this nation. There is literary
freedom as well as religious freedom
Mr.. Agnostic, and we despise your lit
erary narrow -mndedness and intol-
erance.
You who would rob the dying sailor
lad of the comfort of the soothing
words of the chaplain to whom he
falters his last messages to the dear old
folk in the far away New England
hills, you who would rob our litera-
ture of it's greatest classic, you who
would enforce your principles by steal
ing the privileges of other people,
LEARN liberality, liberation, human
sympathy. brotherly loving kindness,
and THEN preach them.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
PROHIBITIONISTS

MO candidate for mayor has been
" nominated by the Prohibition
~ party, says the California Voice.
"A few Prohibttonists who did not feel
free to vote for Mr. Alexander named
c. +. Verge as the best man for those
to vote for who could not support the
recall candidate MIR. Verge is good
man and would make a good mayor,
and we should be delighted to see him
elected, but the party, as such, has
taken no action, believing that the
recall and not politics was the ques-
ton before the people" Under the
circumstances we think that most I'M
ouestionably the temperance and Pro-
hibition vote will be cast for Mr.. AL
exander, and that it is the duty of
Prohlbitionists to vote for the candi-
date who will make and keep Los An
geles a decent city for decent people,
is beyond reasonable doubt.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
WHAT CITY EMPLOYED THIS
so BUSY BOOMING HARPER?

LOS ANGELES, March 7.-[Editor
Herald: Will you please enlighten q
reader as to the identity of man, pre-
sumably city employee, who is of me-
dunn height and wears a salt and pep
per beard, unsuccessfully coaxed to be-
come Van Dyke? This man spends
great deal, if not all, his time riding
on the street cars-he has a pass-and
urging conductors and motormen to
vote for Mayor Harper in the recall
election He says this recall is all
spite work, and continually argues
about the necessity to the street car
employees of retaining Harper in Office.
If this man is employed by the city,
as his conversation would indicate,
why does ne not attend to the city's
business? Is the mayor sending out
his appointees to leg for him with the
help of their street car transportation
as city workers? If so. Is this not an
argument against Harper? Who Is this
man? EMERSON HACKETT.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
WHAT BUSINESS?

wv ITH Municipal Affairs, the Of
w ficiar publication of the Munich
W pal league, we would ask: What
kind of business does the agitation for
change of mayors hurt? No bona
fide business is hurt by decency, order
Illness and good government. Therefore
the only kind of business that can suf-
fer is bad business. If it were true
that good business would suffer, that
would be bad business. but it isn't
true. and if bad business should suffer,
it will be good business. AT least, as
Sam Weller remarked, we are rather
more than half way inclined to think
so. Aren't you?
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
BARNEY'S DIRGE

III EARKEN to the dirge of Barney
III Healy:
III "They forced Mr.. Kern to resign
We appointed one of their own bunch
And now they amt satisfied.
We can't do muffin to nobuddy,
And we can't do muffin fer nobuddy,
And nobuddy can't do muffin to us,
And nobuddy can't do muffin fer us
without somebody hckin'.
Don't it beat -"
Well! we'll! we'll! we'll! Mr.. Barney
Healy will please come to order.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

Eastern surgeons who by mistake
operated on an 8-year-old girl for APP
pendicitis said she would have devel-
oped appendicitis. anyway, so the ope-
ration was all right. The resourceful-
ness of some folks is phenomenal. We
presume if the poor girl had succumbed
the surgeons would have said That's
all right, she would have died some
time. ANYWAY"
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Immigration Cloqqed

New York and other large cities on
the eastern coast are so many reser-
voirs into which the stream of immi-
grafton pours from Europe. The out
lets from these reservoirs leading to the
west and south are clogged by lack of
information on the part of immigrants
respecting the interior of the country,
the demand for work and the oppor-
tunities for home building. Re-
publican.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
AT THE THEATERS

AUDITORIUM-"Bab in the Wood"
MASON-"The Right of Way"
BELASCO-"The Dollar Mark"
MAJESTIC-"The Gingerbread Man"
BURBANK-"Peter Pan"
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
GRAND OPERA HOUsE-"Olivette."
LOS ANGELES--Vaudevill
FISCHER'S-"Are You Tourist"
Notwithstanding
UNIQUE-"College Days"
WALKER--Vaudevil
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
LlttIe Sweet child

Never mind massage or dying the hair.
Never mind smoothing the wrinkles of care,
Never mind worrying day after day
Because there's lock or two turning gray;
Dyes will not cure what the years have
brought
But here is a remedy April-fraught--
A little sweet child in the laughing land,
over the hills with her, hand in hand.
Baltimore Sun.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

Albert Pulitzer has retired from news
paper work, and is in San Francisco,
writing his memoirs, we are told. But.
Great Scott, has the founder of the
Morning Journal any memoirs beyond
being Joe's brother and paving the way
for Hearst?
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

our contemporaries talk about the
queen of England and the empress
of Germany" Why are they not con-
sisteatly wrong? Why don't they speak
of the queen of England and the en-
press of Prussia? One title is as cor
rect as the other. They are both obso-
lete-yintage of Noah's ark; first used
about the time the aqueous patriarch
invented the jag habit.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
A Substitute for Work

physical culture. father is perfectly
lovely!" exclaimed enthusiastic young
miss just home from college. Look! To
develop the arms l grasp this rod by one
end and move it slowly from right to left"
well, WE'LL" exclaimed the father; what
won't science discover! If that rod had
straw at the other end you'd be sweeping"
-Success Magazine.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Far and Wide
Cut In Steel Prices

1t can be stated definitely that radi-
cal cuts in steel prices are now under
consideration. The reduction will not
be confined to 81 and 50 a ton, as here
,tofore, but will range from 81 to 81 a
ton. Steel rails will, in all probability,
remain unchanged. This cut in steel,
which will probably be made within the
uext few weeks, will be the most radi-
cal in years and will show that the in
dustry is not in good condition by any
means.-Wall Street Journal.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
The State Press
Helmet

Helmet is to be congratulated on
moving in favor of Incorporation. 1t
is the largest unincorporated town in
Southern California: and the opportu-
bility to manage it's own affairs and to
promote public improvements will be
appreciated by the people if they once
try it.-Riverside Press.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

TO CORRESPONDENCE intended
for publication must be accompanied by the
name and address Of the writer. The Her
aid gives the widest latitude to correspond
ents, but assumes no responsibility for their
Views. Letters must not exceed 500 words.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

A Chicago university professor says
women stay at home too much. That
is not the conclusion one would reach
after listening to some womens opin-
ions of some other women.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

A skeleton of a duck has been ac-
quired by the American Museum of
Natural History. There is nothing re-
markable about the skeleton, excepting
that it is 100000 years old. We can't
understand how it got past the res
taurant keepers of Gotham.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

An eastern man who has spent much
time in Southern California predicts
that within 100 years there will not be
between Santa Barbara and San Diego
five acres of land not in use.-Santa
Ana Bulletin
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

Hooray! The czarina's cousin Is in
Los Angeles, where she will conduct
an orchestra. She doesn't want her
royal title to be known, so she calls
herself Miss Peters Probably we ought
to say Miss Peters the Great.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

When Mayor Harper fled from city
hall after sending Kern's resignation
to the council he was asked by his
secretary, Where can you be reached
today?" He replied, Nowhere, if I can
help It," That is exactly where he will
be found at the close of the recall cleo
ton. The mayor is prophet
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Discroditer

Why should the white man be proud
and naughty? 1t is said that cannibals
do not like him because his flesh is of
poor havor.-Ramona Sentinel.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Japan Shaky

1t is stated that during the past fifty
years Japan has had 10000 earthquakes.
Is it any wonder that the Japanese are
flocking to California and elsewhere?-
Tulare Advance.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Harper and Schmitz

The mills of the gods grind slow,
yet they grind exceeding small. and it
looks as though Los Angeles would
unload Mayor Harper. who has dis
graced his office as badly as Mayor
Schmitz of San Francisco fame.-Mo-
desto News.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Weather Forecast

Mr.. Taft arrived in New Orleans in q
hurricane and reached Cincinnati in
a blizzard. He is not likely to be out
of the storm belt, for the next four
years.-Oxnard Courier.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Rewarded

A San Quentin prisoner is to be
buried outside the penitentiary walls
as reward for losing his life in heroic
News
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10

IAN I ask is fair play" says Mayor
Harper Mr.. Alexander plays fairly,
and Mr.. Harper is fairly played-out.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
His Kick

love to have folks phone TO me,
Even disturb my slumbers;
But I've worn two stair carpets out
Answering wrong numbers.
Houston Post.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Prize Sleeper

A little babe at Aberavon, Glamor-
ganshire, is a prize sleeper During a
fire in the Jersey , Beach hotel the
youngster was wrapped in blanket
and thrown from a second-story Win
dow. 1t was picked up uninjured. and
still sound asleep. That child is quail
fled to move out to Portland, where it
could slumber in undisturbed repose
for the remainder of it's days.-Seattle
Times.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Foundational

vegetables are reported to be on a
firm basis We imagine the sauerkraut
plant is at the foundation.-Ph
phia Times.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Dumb Powder

Noiseless powder may have its uses
but at celebration it would be as
much out of place as in frontier mel
odrama.-S Louis Globe-Democrat.
Los Angeles herald., 1909-03-10
Revolver Habit

ton for admission to West Point was
accidentally and seriously wounded
yesterday by shot from a revolver
that another candidate for admission
was carrying in his pocket. What
earthly reason can any man have for
CARRYING around a loaded revolver I'M
der such circumstances in such sur
roundings buffalo Commercial.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-24
COLLIFLOWER TO Be UMPIRE
District Employe Gets Leave of Alb
sence of Fifty Days.
Albert A. GRvvIer Appointed Watch
man in the Municipal Building.
News of District Employees.

J. Henry Collhower. assistant 10 the
captain Of the watch OF the Municipal
Building. has been granted ffty-days
furlough without pay. He will take a
position as umpire In the Southern
League. He leaves to-day to take up
his new duties. Mr.. Conihower is we'll
known In professional baseball. having
been an umpire several seasons.
w. NJ. La Roche has been appointed as
sistant 10 the captain Of the watch IN
the absence OF Mr.. Couinower.
Albert A Gawler, a crossing policeman,
has been appointed Waterman in the
Municipal Building
DR.. William TindaIl. secretary 20 the
Board Of Commissioners. is spending his
annual leave on the Pacific Coast. A
letter received from him was dated
/ Grants Pass. IN the Rocky Mountains.
Engineer Commissioner Judson IS on
on his annual leave. He win spend most
o. his time IN the Northwest
Commissioner Henry l. West spent
the week end at the Rod and Gun Club IN
the Blue Ridge mountains. near Harpers
! Ferry, w. va.
Chief Engineer Frank Wagner Is at
Atlantic City. Deputy Chief Sullivan is
acting IN his absence. looking after the
fire department on the return 20 the
city Chief Wagner VIII go 20 Detroit 70
attend the annual convention of the In
ternational Fire Chiefs a special feature
OF that convention viii DE an elaborate
display OF automobile FIRE apparatus fin
use in many OF the large city fire de-
partmcnts
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-24
Heart-tO-heart Talk
Newspaper Readers

Ddyou stop consider why newspapers put headlines
stories? OF course this simple question you wonder
why the writer takes up space asking Yet you undoubtedly
OF those who unconouy accepts those very headlines The
impression they make carries through the average reader
believes the predominang feature of the story the dis
played big type the top truth this usually So but there
exceptions and then the test And the reader
invariably deceived.
We like to have impressions ready-nade for It is
much easier appreciate speech when the speaker dealing
with topic familiar We like historical novels because here
and there some fact of history presented and unconou
but oOmpaceny pat ourselves the back saying THAT agrees
with my recollection of the incident"
We the heater and dozen times during the play try
to predict what is going happen We try read the lines
faster than the speaks them When make successful
forecast atter ourselves 1t is the old q told you So trait
all mankind
All this in explanation of why THE WAsH1NcroN HERALD
prints ad Of its Sunday every Friday morning In
the first place the type large enough attention. the
second place. because of the subjects may be familiar
yet worthy Of further study in the third place.
looking the list of feature articles you may try to forecast
the nature of an article that appeals to YOU
Next Sunday there will be the number Of articles Of
the high class and many of them illustrated Look over the
list and whether you will be missing something should
you fail to get a copy of the paper
Following is the for Sunday reading:
James B. Morrow details chatty and anecdotal interview
with Jonathan Doyer the oratory have
f
which really caused him to leave home
throughout United young man and attracted be
notice OF James G. Blaine for whom he
threatened introduced the circus
politics.
Mrs. Symes in her health and beauty talks warns against
n-hting corsets in developing the youthful
The Jusweds their vacation and the trials and
they worth
reading
Following the topics the Editorials by the ay page
Universe Without Beginning Humaniys Rem
Feminine Beauty
ii OF Strength.
The element OF hunor predoinates Roundsman Cancys
Catch" by that prince writer's Gillian
This detective story comes out the other
Mr. Boots novelette, tells of the humor and pathos on
n greenroom.
The Cigarette strong adventure story by William Dent
Pltman. author of THE Quincy
An illustrated page will be devoted history Of the New
York Heralds short
held
Edwin L. Sabn has short story After the Honeymoon"
Here's chance for two
News of the world summarized The Arbter The ExAttache
The Nations Pawn and other viii
clientele cosmopolitan Herald conceded
to stand the head the
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-24

Fortune promptly. "and All VIII say,
jedge, dat All does lax nah grinds.'
Didn't he let you have any money!
asked the court.
why. I.awd bless you. jedge. he didn't
have no money hisself," said Mrs. For
tune.
AS she left the stand. William, who
had been sitting back in his chair, in
an attitude Of humble misery, straight
ened and addressed her.
Tell his honor bout dat hawg," he
requested Mrs. Fortune paid no atten-
| ton 10 the remark, go his honor requested
| that the husband come 70 the witness
stand and relate the incident himself.
william Bemoaned Fate.
ABS de mos onluckiest man dat eveh
lived" whined william as he seated him
self on the stand.
you see. jedge," he continued. some
time las yeah somebody done put a
| hoodoo on me while An was away rum
home Up to dat time Aid been gettin
erlong all right Well, de frs All noticed
dis hoodoo wus one day when All came
home an saw NAH gyarden gtun' all
dried up. All didn't min IT at frs, but
when chickens come in nah yahd an
/ ct up NAH new cohn and two Of EN-
got killed by nah dawg and All gou
arrested 70 keepin' a savage animile on
de premises-why. den, All got mad an
moved.
de mex house All got in leaked In de
roof. an All moughty neah died when It
rain one night So All moved outer dere,
an when de men stahted to take de
furnlchoor away dey busted nah bureau
and left a chair fall on nah foot. Dat
laid me up 70 a week.
"Ah done bought some rabbits feet.
and nah cat got de rabbits feet an tried
to eat EN-. and got some kin Of jumpin'
fits. Den All lost nah job and me 'en
Mis- Fortune an de res OF nah furni-
ture moved TO Goat Alley. All bought
La 'hawg Wen An got deah. A nice fat
hawg"
William paused a moment 70 master his
rising emotions.
dis wus a fine hawg. y'onner. All wus
/ hggerln' on selling him an maxim 'leben
dollahs an eighty-hve cents on middlin's s.
when we got IN dis new house All
SEE TO mahse'f sez I. An reckon OF man
! hoodo'u leave mo 'en NAH hawg alone
now
well. yonner. All done fine at frs
'cepin' dat hawg OF mine no used TO 80
rOotin 'aroun' in the gyardens Of nah
frens. Dat made EN- mad an dey tor
me dat efen An didn't keep dat gruntin'
beast outer dey Yards dey wus gwine 10
/ fix him II Amt iauch mo- 20 tell. y'onner,
/ One monin' An got up an found Will
/ lam--dat was NAH hawg. Aid named
after me-dald in nah yard. Somebody d
kilt him"
sOba Break stiffness.
| For q moment william Fortunes trem-
bling sobs were the only sound IN the
court room. Evidently the deceased pOr-
cine friend. upon whom he had lavished
his affections was a distinctive animal
I whose memory was not easily forgotten
When he returned 10 his theme he mourn
fully informed the court that he had
gotten a position that morning and was
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-24
MANY ENTER FLORAL PARADE
Much Public Interest Shown in Pro-
posed Automobile Carnival.
MIR. Sinclair Names subcommittee I,
Take Up Availability Of Chang
ing Divorce Law.

T. B. Spence. chairman OF the COM
mittee on entrants and classes for the
proposed automobile floral carnival. an
nounces that several entries were made
yesterday for places IN the parade II
is understood that the entire list 10 date
VIII be made public to-day. Four or five
prizes IN the way Of cups have been
offered 90 the committee IN charge Of
that portion Of the carnival. and 1t Is
| expected that others viii be added 10 the
list IN the next few days
Isaac Cans. chairman OF the general
committee. received "A letter yesterday
from Commissioner mcfarland accent
I ing the invitation 10 act as one OF the
judges OF the parade.
The subcommittee Of the committee on
law and legislation Of the Chamber OF
Commerce, which will consider the adj
Visibility Of changing the divorce laws
Of the District Of Columbia was APP
pointed yesterday by A. LeftWich Sin
clair. chairman Of the main committee.
The subcommittee is composed Of Benia-
min F. Barnes (chairman), Walter 3.
( Guy. Frederick c.. Handy. William n.
Holloway, F. w. Mackenzie. Frank p
Milburn. Jesse +. Potbury. Col Arthur
Z. Randle. William f. shannon. James
A. TOomey, J. Dawson Williams. and
Alexander Wolf.
Mr.. Sinclair has drafted an amendment
20 section 1856 Of the code. which he VIII
submit 70 the subcommittee as n basis or
their Investigations for future work. The
amendment is az follows:
Section 9Ss. Causes for divorce.-A di-
vorce from the bond Of marriage may be
granted for any of the following causes.
namely: First. for adultery committed
by either party during the marriage.
/ second, for cruelty Of treatment. endan-
gering the life and health Of either party:
third. for habitual drunkenness or either
party for a period OF three years. and
fourth, for willful desertion and abau-
donment Of either party for the full and
uninterrupted period Of two years Where
an absolute divorce has been granted for
any Of such causes the innocent party
only may remarry, and remarriage by
the party held 10 he guilty IN the pro-
ceedings for divorce shall be deemed big
amy. and on conviction thereof such party
shall be punished by Imprisonment for
not less than two nor more than seven
years; but nothing herein contained shall
prevent the remarriage Of the divorced
parties 20 each other"
The code at present recognizes but one
cause for absolute divorce. and provides
that the innocent party only may re-
marry.