The farmer and mechanic. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 18??-19??, 1909-03-30
Mr., DOO[Ey ON POLITICAL EVENTS
BY F. P. Dunno


often have [ seen thin takin' their
boys around an pintin' him out an
sayin', There he is, me iad. LOOK
well at him an in future years We
can say to ye'er childher that We nave
seen tn face iv Joe H. Dickinson. AS
a leader he was bold to tn pint ~
recklessness often bein' carrid be ms
enthusyasm into tn Republican ranks.
But NTH dark hours iy defeat he Wud
come back tO our Ouncll an tell us
why we lost. 1t is not without a SIN
sation iv grief, Hinnissy, that | Sc
him lave to take up his Jootles IN a
higher spear that knows no brOther.
Us old Dimmycrats, we Will meet, out
we will miss him. We have missed
him often on ilictlon day. Now we
will miss him FIR tn four years be
tween, too. He will make a great
sicrety iv war. In time lV throuDle
We may be sure tina his sOOfd Will
flash firm its scabbard an his voice
be heerd ~proclaimin' in claryon tones:
Me brave boys, befure us lies tn,
inilny's camp Follow me an we Will
soon be in it. - .z..
But even more important thin tn
department ~ war is tn departmint
iv green goods. TIL hand that cashes
tn pay check is tn hand that rules
tn wurruld, as tn pote says. An
here again we have a thried an thrust
ed Dimmycrat. / do not know him,
though I've often pasted his lithy-
graft in me front window. But he's
a great frind iv HOgan's. Hogan
was very happy over this appointment.
Whin he read about it in tn pa-aper
he burst into song: 'Aat last he says,
we are in power. To We, Misther
Sicrety iv tn Threasury, me greetings
an top iv tn mornin'. Iithry col
lague, fellow ROGER brother Dimmy-
crat' OFT in mo innnPnh11Cp VOllfh
have / hoped over ye>er skids, or
gazed with wondhrin' eyes into ye'er
windows fruited deep with peach an
pear, IN pearline an prune! Oft
have I seen ye with a sugar scoop in
wan hand an a copy lv Marcus
Aureelyus in tn other! Oft have [
voted FIR We Whin Roger Sullivan led
tn way. OFT whin tortured be some
Republican to name Dimmycratic
leader that shaved ivry day, wore a
s%tOvepipe hat outside iV a parade an
didn't have an inthrest in a faro bank
have [ ye'er name. An now
to think iv We. me brother in Apollo
an Andrew Jackson, settin' down
there in II at tn cashiers
window itsilf, be hivens, almost makes
me weep. I'm goin' to take a thrain,'
says Hogan, an ask him Fl a job. I
wanst broke q transparency pearin'
his name over tn head iv a German
in Halsted Sthreet,' he says. i wud-
dent CO. says l. I'd write tn ap-
klicatiOn undfer ar assumed name
dhrop it into a letter box an rum says
/. If We win down We might find
him busy helpin' to construct a tariff
bill that Wud protect our infant indus
threes an he mightn't wan to be dis
turbed,' says I.
An there We are. I don't know
what tn Republicans wud do if it
,r-a c1sN f,- 40 ~ hotl l. $40
at an afther tn Elections. Ye heerd
how We thWarted TIL almost inhuman
conspiracy against Uncle Joe Cannon.
Ills a romantic tory. Ye know Uncle
Joe? Anyhow, we've seen his face in
pitchers-a handsome face; but Vis-
ionary an lncautiOus. Out here in
Illinye where we have seen his wur-
ruk, we know this sainted ~charackter.
FIR nanny years Uncle Joe has ruled
tn House iv Representatives, be love an
pc love alone. His is a soul, as tn
pote' says, that he is a star and dWells
apart. He niver shud've been in pol
lyticks.5 He is -th' kind iv a man We
wud get to judge a flower show, but
he Wud be useless in a horse thrade.
He knows no more about pollyticks
thin Canada Bill knew bout three
card monty. He had been in. Wash'n-
ton NANNY years more thin tn con-
~spirators, cut what does eXpeeryence
count to a man who has done nawthin'
all his life but take bad money in
change FIR good. An these savage,
pow'rful an injanyous men detar-
mined to creep up behind this "
imprudent old philanthropist an de-
sthroy him. They almost did it too.
HaVin' absolute confidence in human
nature, he niver SUSPECTS anything.
He was TX a timid fox among a
horde iv feerocyous hens. 1t was pitt
flu to see him settingup there, with
a cigar tilted in his mouth an an ex-
preston on his face like a man with
four iv a kind in his hand witchin' an
Englshman wcndhrin' whether he
ought to come in an dhraw four
Meanwhile tn crafty conspirators con-
spired as their wont is in secret on
tn t1ure iv tn house. on tn sthreet