The Lafayette advertiser. [volume] (Vermilionville [i.e. Lafayette], La.) 1865-19??, 1909-09-03
Before His Honor
Why the Prisoner W.s
Discharged

AoSS VI lie OOcket. Magistrate Alex
ander Quade, already late for dinner.
was about to postpone the hearing
lei his clerk whispered that the
charge was wife-beating and distur-
bance. This intelligence made the
Judge settle back in his seat again.
His honor took special delight III such
cases; never in the whole history Of
his judicial career was a prisoner
known to escape with less than the
extreme penalty.
The present culprit was suffering
from a cold. The Judge was in a like
p~redicament, and whenever the man
in the dock cleared his throat, the
Judges bronchial tubes began to
tickle. This caused him to treasure
up animosity against Lapidus before
the hearing began.
The fact, too, that the judges din
ner was waiting made the clerk, who
Knew the judicial temperament, de-
eide that the reprimand which al
ways followed the imposition of the
extreme penalty would be well worth
hearing In this case.
Judge Quade's court was conducted
on most informal lines. When the
charge had been read and the plea
entered, the magistrate called out:
Mrs. Julia Lapidus, stand up and
be sworn. You, too, Lapidus, get I'D
and swear Administer the oath, Mr.
Clerk, and let's get the thing over
Now, Mrs. Lapidus, don't be afraid"
20, judge" sighed the prosecuting
witness. I'm SO frustrated. This is
the first time I've ever been in court"
You should have come here long
ago. Does he abuse you much?"
mo, indeed: this is the first time
he ever had q chance"
"Hum-m; sit down a minute. Well,
Lapidus. what have you to say! Do
you want to change your plea to gull
ty,' and save timer"
HE won't do it, your honor" ex-
claimed his wife. 'He never would
for me about the simplest things, even
when I'd catch him in the act"
Come, come" growled the magis-
trate. make your confession"
The prisoner cleared his throat and
began: Last night l came home with
my head tied up-been having a cold
for two weeks-regular grip-ringing
the ears-pain in the head and
neck-eyes lunning-also nose-tick-
ling sensation" He stopped to
cough.
Here, here" rubbing his eyes and
nose. and coughing in unison with the
prisoner. Il don't care about the symp-
Go ahead"
when l got home with my head all
tied up she came out in the kitchen
and said she had a caller in the par.
lor. l asked who he was, and instead
of telling me, she went on about there
being a monkey odor in the house.
There's a young preacher at
church, and he's very high-church and
and thought at first that he
was making a call, and that it was the
odor Of sanctity she was talking
about"
The wagging jaws of Mrs. Lapidus
grew ~articulate at this point and she
sprang up.
II didn't" she asserted. 81 said
had supper in the parlor because there
was a musty odor in the rest of the
Il don't care what led UP to the dis
cried the magistrate, black
proved with wrath. Tell me the spe-
cific act Of ill-usage, and let me get
his fellow sentenced and go home to
Inner"
20, l al do that all right" ex-
the woman. "I1l never for |
get it as long as l live. Why, after |
ne choked me into swallowing that |
lose l vas so sure I'd die the next |
minute that l wrote to my sister to
come see that my bones were laid to !
est in some reputable charnel house"
The Judge leaned owe to his clerk
Ind whispered:
Perhaps l can hold this fellow for
murder. Just get a COM
nitment blank ready and mako thu |