The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1909-12-31
NO. 81.

70 q
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W. - -
ACROSTIC.
Minstrels mingling melodiously.
Unlsonal utteranceS uprising.
Sopranos soaring sublimely.
Impresarios initiating ideas.
Contraltos caroling cadenZas.
Life.
BLESSED ASSURANCE.
Inquiring Henderson-tPaw, what
S single blessedness?
Father-.That's when the doctor
ays it isn't twins. Harvard Lam
,oon.
HAW! HAW!
Gussie-''I say, old chap, how do
'ou pronounce this bally word met
-m-p-s-y-c-h-o-s-i-s?'
Algie-'tI don't, deah boy "-Dos-
on Transcript.
POLITICAL REPARTEE.
''The motto of our party is Turn
he rascals out!
. We'll, I guess your party has
urned out more rascals than any
,ther. ."-Cleveland Leader.
IN THE WRONG SHOP.
LADY, would like you to paint
ny portrait with my hat On"
Painter-"Good gracious, madam,
7ou'll have to go to a landscape
,ainter for that. -Meggendorfe
3laetter.
FIVE GOOD REASONS.
IlOW Is IL tudC yOu di NOlhIES,
vhen all your fellow workmen are on
trike?"
''I've five excellent reasons why I
hould; my wife and four children"
Bon Vivant.
NEVER FORGETS EN-.
"Maude is continually giggling.
The seems to have an ever-present
ense of humor."
'tNot at all. What she has is sim
ly an ever-present consciousness Of
implies. Boston Transcript.
GENEROUS.
Club Waiter (fshing dreamed
asst night, sir, that you gave me IS
ill"
Stingy Indeed, James!
hats little high for a tip; but
may keep it."-Boston
IN PLUNKVILLE.
"How kin I improve my empo-
Jump inquired the proprietor of the
eneral store.
"You might start by having them
rates out in front cushioned" sug-
ested one of the prominent loafers
f the town. - Louisville Courier
Ournal.
AN ADVANCE OF sAvAGERY."
Mr. Grump Ca savage bachelor)-
I don't see why man should get
aarried when a good parrot can be
ought for twenty-five dollars !"
Miss Readywitt-"Asu usual we wo-
len are at disadvantage. A grizzly
ear can't be bought for many times
hat. Boston Transcript.
THE QUEER SEX.
"Sir, my wife says that you have
cen staring at her for the last ten
linutes. want an apology"
Certainly. I may have been look
1g at your wife, but I was in deep
tudy and did not see her at all. -
Gee! When she hears that she'll
e madden than ever. Boston
ranscript.
THEIR PURPOSE.
Mirrors" says the thoughtful
IAN, "were given to woman so that
he may see herself as others see
err
Hardly" comments the man with
he faded whiskers. "They were
iven to her so she may make her
elf see herself as she wants others
} see her. Chicago Post.
AT THE ALTAR.
"Pa," said the beautiful heiress,
you mustn't fail to get back in time
or the wedding. There will be no
ne else to give me away"
ITO give you away? Good gosh,
hat amt no name for it. Didn't l
ay the Baron 100000 in cold cash
, take you? I guess you amt no
remium, are u?"-Chicago Rec
HE'D BEEN THERE.
Johnny, you said you'd
cen to Sunday-school.'
Johnny with a faraway look)-
Yes, mamma"
Mother - "How does it happen
nat your hands smell of fish,"
JOHNNY carried home the Sun
ay-school paper, an the outside page
all about Jonah and the whale. -
Western Christian Advocate.
CARRYING THEM OUT.
Would-Be Contributor sent in
few contributions to you day or
No ago, sir, which | am sure would
improve your paper. Have you car
led out any of my ideas?"
Editor-''Did you happen to notice
red-headed Office boy with waste
aper basket going down stairs?''
Contributor did, sir"
Editor-"Well, he was busy carry
lg out your ideas. Sketch.