davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Willing to Entertain Her.


MY entrance upon my career as q
charity visitor was as volunteer. /
arrayed myself for my first attempt
with misgiving in my heart. 1 was
SO afraid Of my reception. found my
first address on the third floor of a
rear tenement, stumbled up the dark
stairs and timidly knocked at the door.
1t was opened instantly by small boy
who peered at me curiously.
Isis your mother in:'' inquired.
NOM" was the prompt reply.
She's gone to see the doctor. But
you can come i'm
He held the door Hospitality open, ant
l stepped across the threshold and en-.
tered. l selected a chair and sat down
The small boy wriggled into a chair
opposite.
II have fits," he announced, will
Importance.
"Wha-at?" l stammered.
II have 'em often," he went on eager.
". "tits-real fits. may have one any
time. l might have one right now"
But was already in the hall.
you won't stay?' he shouted aftel
me aggrievedly. She'll be right
back"
But very much upset volunteer Wis
itor was already out Of hearing.-New
York Herald.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
A Lono Dive.

"a circus came to little town in
Tennessee" said Colonel Robert NJ
Gates in the Saturday Evening Post
land one of the attractions was high
diver, a chap who dove from the tor
of the tent into a shallow tank. which
Is feat common enough. but which
created a deal of talk in that locality.
1.-THE wiseacres were talking about
1t at the store. Many Of them thought
it could not be done without killing
the diver, but one old man insisted
that it was perfectly feasible.
What do you know about diving?
he was asked.
".Waal,' he replied. 'nothin' in per
ticker about that kind Of divin', but
I used to have cousin who was the
longest diver ye ever see.'
Longest divery scoffed the Other
sitters. 'Where'd he diver
"'Onct,' replied the old man. he bel
thousand dollars he could dive from
Liverpool to New York.
Ibid he do it?'
"'Nop. not that time. Ye see, hi
kinder miscalculated an come up II
Denver"
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
THE THRlCE.A.WEEK WORLD

Without a Rival in Its Field
The Largest, Cheapest and Best
Newspaper published at the price.
Read in every English-speaking coun-
try.
1t has Invariably been the great eff
fort of the Thrice-a-W edition of
the New York World to publish the
news impartially in order that it may
be an acurate reporter of what has
happened. 1t tells the truth, ire
spective of party, and for that reason
it has achieved a position with the
public unique among papers of its
class.
The subscription season is now at
hand and this is the best offer that
viii be made to you.
If you want the news as it really is,
subscribe to the Thrice-a-week edi-
ton of the New York, which comes
to you every other day except Sunday,
and is thus practically daily at the
price of a weekly.
The Black Hills Union and New
1or1 World together for one year for
s1.75.
The regular subscription price of
the two papers is $3.50.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19

There still exists very old custom
among seamen of displaying a broom
ut the masthead of ships intended to
be sold to indicate that they are to be
swept away" The custom original
ed with the famous Dutch admiral
Tromp. who when he appeared off the
English coast hoisted broom to show
his intention of sweeping the Eng
lish fleet from the sea. The Eng.
lish admiral. replying to this tmper-
tinent signal. Immediately hoisted a
horsewhip to the masthead Of his
ship to show the arrogant Dutchman
that he meant to give him drubbing.
For this reason pennant is oftentimes
dubbed 1.-The horsewhip" by seafaring
men. Sea lore. of course, is full Of
symbolism. and the broom is only one
of many signs used that have a meta.
phorical meaning.-London Globe.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Perversity.

"One popularity Of melancholia,"
said a specialist, us that the victim of
it actually enjoys the dependency and
often doesn't want to be cured. once
told young woman who had this dis
ease that she must be careful Of her
digestion and eat nothing fried. After
that she tried to eat only fried food.
Not only did she insist on having her
potatoes and meat fried, but didn't
want to eat bread unless 1t had been
fried in a>1ot of grease."-New York
Tribune
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
OUT of PIace.

A sentry. an lrishman. was on post
duty for the first time at night. when
the officer of the day approached. He
called. who comea thereY'
"Oficer of the day." was the reply.
'"Then what are yez dom out at
night?" asked the sentry. : London
Telegraph.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Ea.iIv Controlled.

Mrs. Bacon-I wish my husband
would go wherever I want him to
Mrs. Egbert- Why don't you get one
of those dirigible husbands Yonkers
Statesman.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Title Insurance.

Heiress-Do you examine titles, Mr..
Lawyer? Lawyer-I do. ma'am. Heir.
ess-Well. this is my 6asco. Lord Pre-.
serveus. I'd like you to examine his
title before we get married. I'D hate
to get stung.-Judge.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Rapartee.

Father" said twelve year old Ma.
bel. looking up from her book. What
is reparteew
"Back talk" answered father, ''but
SO smart that you wish you'd said II
YOURSELF"
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
The Roof Garden.

Hilda-But what is the difference be-
tween roof garden and any other
garden? Harry-Well. on a roof gar.
den the daisies bloom at night.-Chi
cago News.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
p.me.nor Analvzed.

"Your chauffeur seems very respect.
full" said the guest.
THAT air Of deferential solicitnde."
replied Mr.. Chuggins. zig moi respect
1t is sympathy,"'-WashingtoD Star.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Has picked up Estray Horse.

HAS P1cKeu up Estray HorSe.
An estray sorrel horse, Weighing
about 500 pounds, has been taken up
by me and is now being taken care of.
The animal has two white feet, star
on forehead, and is branded: TDX on
left hip, and DIP on shoulder. Owner
can secure possession by proving his
property. HANS GRAVES,
2l-4t. Rapid City, S. d.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
A Gentleman Of Leisure.

Codling-Why did you speak to tina,
old twamp, dear boy? Softy-Why
shouldn't I. old chappie? He isn't in
twade. and he doesn't work faw a liv.
ing.-Exchange.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
one at Home.

Mrs. Happywed-l never saw an ed
ucated bear. Did you: Patient Wife
Yes. indeed. We have one. Come over
some afternoon when be IL at home.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
AM Ocean.

Teacher-W What is an ocean? Johnny
"A body Of water necessitating bat
tleships.-New York Sun.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19

Devote each day,to the object then
in time. and every evening will ind
anynethlng done.-Goeths.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19
Property has its duties as well as its
rights.-Drummond.
Naturally.

Medical PROFESSIONALISM is the re-
suit. young gentlemen. when patients
temperature goes down as far as 1t
can? Student Why-er-he gets cold
feet-Cleyeland Leader.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19

valnglory blossoms, but never bears
French Proverb.
The Black Hills union and western stock review. [volume] (Rapid City, S.D.) 1904-19??, 1909-11-19

The affections are like lightning. You
cannot tell where they will strike until
they have fal!en.-Lacordaire
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

In the department Of Pearson'r
Weekly OF England known as The
Editors Notebook" there recently ap-
peared the following story OF an edi-
tor Of New York paper. who called
q reporter to him and said:
Il want you to write me a good
story about the trials and dtscourage-
ment of men who are looking 70.
work in a big city. Get up early to-
morrow. put on old clothes, and visit
all the places that advertise for male
help in the morning paper. Give an
account OF the number OF applicants
and the kind OF men they are, and de-
scribe viyidly the feelings Of those
who perhaps have had no breakfast
and have walked miles because they
have no money to ride, and then meet
disappointment. Draw it good and
strong on the pathos. People like to
read that sort OF thing.
At noon the nes. day the reporfe!
appeared at the ONCE crsstfal,en.
I'm afraid ! can't make anythtnx
cut cf that story" be said to the
editor.
whats the troubies-
i've got three jobs already. and .
promise OF two more"
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

De nod win whiri de leab<s about,
Farewell. oh. frogs en- llsshds:
Aunt Hannah SIT her gocsehore out
In hint OBJ cunmin' bhxsahds
DE long gray clouds dcy speak ob snov
Dc shntie's los cts blossom,
Who's des IN de sycamos
Why, hcwdy. Masteh Possum,
Possum huntin sime'
Posrum huntin tune,
Thrash det tire en- shake EN- free
Climb up, lii boy. climb:
Down IN de swxmpy hollow.
Wen midnight bells do chime.
All m glad TO be in Dixie
In possum hunt,n time,
Down IN de deepcs' timbsh trAc'
De poasum dAwex am lesdn'.
In man he heats de briahs bac
HIS cheeks en- fnechs bleeding.
" po~sum cling wid has han hike feet,
I'm ct seem 20 hahd to fetch him.
But Lawxee, he tAs e twlce - sweet
When Ct takes 10 long to keseh him.
Possum huDtin' time!
Poesum huntin' time'
Fro swainps we prowl end skeeh dct owl
Wen de red moon stahts to climb.
Mex mawnin' oil Aunt Posha
She cook det po~sum prime.
Hurrah' hurrahl foh Dixie
In possam huntin' time
Victor a. Hermann. in Judge
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Enthusiast tat musical recital) -
I'VE shall hear more Of this youns
man" Sufferer-"Not tonight,
hope. Punch.
Blobbs-" Every man has his
price" Slobbs-~Oh, | dot know.
Many q man gives himself away. y
Philadelphia Record.
In walking through a train. Q
smile always relieves the tension OF
the moment--even II 1t is the train
OF your hostess's best dinner gown.
Puck.
Il cannot eing the old songs"
Her promise short and tersc
She kept. But then she went and sans
The new ones-which we're worse:
Boston Traveller.
Say. pa, won't you buy me a
drum" mo. I'm afraid you'd dis
turb me with the noise" mo.
won't pa; I'll only drum when your
asleep. p."-Life.
Little Willie-"Say. pa, when is a
man said to be civilized?" Pa
when he knows enough to conceal
the fact that he is a savage, my son.
Chicago Daily News.
The Millonaire-"He Henri. fetch q
car. at once." The Chauffeur
Which one. sir?" The Millionaire
(astounded) You don't mean to
say there's more than one out Of the
repair shop?"-Puck.
Hubbubs--"Do you have any po.
lice protection out where you lives'
Subbubs-"Oh, yes, no trouble about
that. We have saloon on the next
corner and an Irish cook in the
kitchen. ."-Philadelphia Record
Stage-struck The butt of gods and men.
(Pray, reader. do not acofiI
False friends, they esg him o., and thea.
The gods they egg him oa.
"Is Mrs. Brown at homer inquiries
the caller. mo, ma am. she isn't.
replied the maid. ~Thcn 1t was you
who was singing 30 dreadfully out OF
tune when l turned the corner" said
the caller. mo. indeed, ma'am,
cried the indignant maid; that was
missus! !"-Cleveland Leader.
Josiah Ito newly welded neighbor)
- wish you long, happy lives; and
l see no reason since you have had
experience, why you and Mariah can
not pull together as steady and happy
and successfully as a team OF horses y
Obediah-"No doubt we could. II
there was only one tongue between
us. Judge.
Sammy" said Germantown
mother recently to her youngest
born. when you divided those seven
pieces OF candy with your brother
did you give him four?" mo
ma'am," replied Sammy, Il knew
they wouldn't come out even. SO l ate
one before began to divide. ."-Har.
pers Weekly.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

It's easy enough TO recognize the
symptoms OF poor paint. after IL has
been on awhile--Aftcr its inherent
tendency to crack and peel and scale
and blister. etc, has developed into
trouble. You know these paint dis
eases" usually Indicate adulteration
or substitution In the paint materials.
And you know the only remedy IL re-
painting.
A little knowledge OF paint and
painting requirements. and how to
make SURE OF the purity and quality
Of materials. would prevent all trou-
ble. and save the big extra expense Of
re-painting; Just ~ . proper knowl-
edge OF simple heaith-la~A and OBJ
ssrvaAce OF them. prevents sickness.
A complete painting guide. inciud-
ing . book Of color schemss. spectA-
eaticns for all kinda Of paintinx work.
and IN inst trument for detecting Adul-
teration In paint materials, with d.
rections tor uelng II. can be had fres
by writing National Lead Co. 1909
Trinity Bldg. New York, and askins
for Housevvners Painting Outfit
No. ~.
A very simple guide In the pur-
chaae Of white lead tthe only sure
and safe paint materially IL the
famous Dutch Boy Painter" trade
mark. that trademark is an absolute
guarantee OF purity and quality.
How use doth hrpcd "a habit In n
man. n.--Shakespeare
The new South-news., 1909-03-27
~ LESS MEAT
Advice Of Family Physician.

Formerly people thought meat nec-
essary for strength and muscular
vigor.
The man who worked hard was
supposed to require meat two or
three times q day. Science has found
out differently.
1t Is now a common thing for the
family physician to order less meat.
as In the following letter from a n.
Y. man:
Il had suffered for years with dys-
pepsia and nervousness. My physi-
clan advised me to eat less meat and
greasy foods generally. tried sew
eral things to take the place OF my
usual breakfast of chops. fried pota-
toes, etc, but got no relief until
tried CrApe-Nuts food.
After using Grape Nuts for the
cereal part OF my meals for two
yearz, am now a well man. Grape
Nuts benefited my health FAR more
than the $4,000 worth OF medicine
had taken before.
Ny wife and children are health
Ter than they had been for years. and
We are Z very happy family. largely
due to Grape-Nuts.
We have been 20 much benefited
by Grape-Nuts that It would be un-
grateful not to acknowledge it,
Name given BY Postum Co.. Battle
Creek, Mich. Read The Road tc
Wellville." in pkgs- There's a Rea-
SON"
Ever read the above letter? 4 n~u
- appears nsom time to tine. They
ase opuuies trues 80 fuil ef ssumss
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

He was from down somewhere or
out somewhere and on his nrst visit
to New York. He had often heard OF
the highball and went to the cafe OF
an expensive hotel in Fifth avenue to
make the acquaintance OF this luz
ury. To enjoy it properly he took a
seat At = table.
When the waiter brought the tail
glass. the visitor said to himself:
'Disf!lIed waters run Deep"
When be saw the amount on the
check he perverted the proverb stu
further. thus:
Distilled waters run steep. New
York Tribune.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

oy!ocal applications - thsycsnnot rsaeh the
3iseased portion Of the ear here II only one
Usy to cure deafness. and that u by consti-
tusionAl remedies. Deafness II caused BY an
nnsmed condition Of the mucous lining Of
the Enstachtan Tube. Wnso this ube u In
dAmed you kave . ru milling sound or irnper-
fect hearing. and when II Is entirely closed
Deafness IL the result, and unless tn . q d am
0stion can be taken out and this tube re-
stored TO IL normal condition. he airing will
be destroyed forever. Nine cases out OF ten
are caused bycstarrh. which IL moth ingbutan
indaned condition OF the mucous surfaces.
We will give Ono Hundred Dollars for any
ease oiDeafness( caused bycatarrh )thnt can.
not be cured by nall'sCatarrhC Cure. send for
circulars free. F.J.CnESEr 4 Co.. .Toiedo.O O.
Sold by Druggists. TIC.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipa alton.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Red. Weak. Weary, watery Eyes
Relieved by Murine Eye Remedy.
Compounded BY Experienced Physicians
Conforms to Pure Food aud Drug Lave
Murine Doesn't Smart: Soothes Eye Pain
The new South-news., 1909-03-27
COVERED WITH HIVES.

Ing. Irritating Hamor for 2 Months
in Terrible Plieht-DiSease
Cured By Cuticura.
my nix year old daughter had the dresd-
fl disease called hives for two months.
She Became afflicted by playing With ch,l-
dren who he'd il. By scratching she c.u4ed
!arrs sores which wsrs irritating. Her
body was = complete sore but il was wor,e
on her arms and back. We employed a
Physician who left medicine but il did not
help her and tried several remedies but
without avail. Seeing the Cuticura Rene
dee Advertised. thought would try
them ! gave her = hot bath daily with
Cuticura Soap and anointsd her body with
Cutacurs Ointment. The first treatment
relieved the itching and in . short time the
disease disappeared Mrs. G. l.. FudhoH
Warren. Mich. June 30 and July 10. 'oe. y
Potter Drug 4 Chem. Corp, Sole Props
OF Cuticnrn Remedies. Boston. Mas.
He bears misery best who hides
IL most t-ShAkpsDpa parc
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

The best way to get girl to like
you IL to get her brothers not to-
New York Press.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

American touring in Europe find
II cheaper to rent automobiles alb
road than to take their own.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

American Who Can't Speak spanist
Without the Help Of His Arms.

American Who Can't Speak Spanish
Without the Help Of His Arms.
There Is q man who from very
early age has hved In countries
where Spanish is the almost universal
tongue. From force OF this training,
he speaks Spanish perfectly.
He has not the slightest trace OF
an English accent and persons who
do not know that he Is OF American
parentage are willing to believe he
is a Spaniard. merely from bearing
him talk. He is so perfectly bilingual
that It shows even In his gestures.
When talking with English speak.
ing persons he sits quietly and does
his conversing with his mouth alone
Only in case Of making a point most
emphatically does he use a gesture.
But the moment he drops into
Spanish his every word is accom-.
panied by = movement OF the hands
Or arms. 1t IL interesting to watch
the change from the English to the
Spanish side Of him. because 1t comes
70 suddenly. He really can't speak
Spanish without gesturing. - New
York SUM-
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Your working power depends upon your
health, Garfield Tea corrects disorders OF
liver, kidneys stomach spd bowels; over
brings good health
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Rheumatism, Neuralgia and sore Throat
will not live under the same roof with
Hamlins Wizard Oil the best OF sll rene
diee for the relief IF an paju
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

First relieve the needy; then. II
need be. question them.-Rule Of IL
Benedictines.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

In the place where the tree falle
tn there shall it lie.---Bible.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Hicks CAPUDfKK Is the best remedy
relieves the aching and feverishness-cur
the Cold and restores FORMAL conditions. lt'<
LIQUID effects Immediately. loc.. 25c. and
Soc. at drug stores.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Whether from Colds. Heat Stomach or
Nervous Trou bles. Capudine viii relieve you
It's liQutd-pleaSant to take-ect imme1i-
ately. TRY II, ioc. 25c, and Qc. st drug
The new South-news., 1909-03-27
A CURE FOR frs.

1oe Treaemeot Il to Accoup,tsa
What Scteace 6as Beea SaFSse-
g1lng to Attain for Ceu9urtes.
The intense lntereue that hns bssa mani
fested thronshcut the country b. the won
drfnl cures that ars besng accomplished
daily By epslepsse,de still continues. Il y
really surprsanG the vase number Of peopje
Who have already beea cured Of hts and
nervousne~. Ia order that everybody may
have chance to tcst ths nsdic.ns, large
Epalepay and tlstimoniais. will b. sent by
PAl e6sc!uteiy free 70 al who vr,te to she
Nay LeborstoJ. 54e Pearl Street,
y York City.
e syptlesds cure i Grating great
PC intFof> - veil - among Dcctor,,
- (Ho~psssls aud waiting Phvs.cssns
Cet the evolutionists remem-
1 ,$s6v&nces and rises. The beast
does not.-Coldwin Smith.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27
BRIEF rtEssoN IN ENGLISH.

BRIEF LESSON IN ENGLISH.
0rAduate--Which IL the proper ex
preston to use-"Girls are or Girls
Isl"
Chorus OF Schoolmates-"Clrls
are" OF course!
f.i- 7duate-Of course: pshaw'
fmy hat on suaight?-Tlt
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

Keep all you have. and try for all
you can--BuIver Lytton.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

He bears misery best who hides
most. t.-Shakcspeare.
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

ALREADY PUNISHED.
The night rider protested drowsily
against being tried
rive lost & lot Of sleep" he said
peeviohIy 'aint that trial enough 2
-Phlladeluhia Ledger
The new South-news., 1909-03-27

P1Jeo Cused In = to ~ Deyp.
PhnD OintDoot y Goasaoteo1 70 cure ans
ennecl ltsbiag. Dlind EIeeding a. Pru4 rud,re
PiI0 II 3 - n dayo q 0oeay rs5unlaA. ~
The Big Sandy news. [volume] (Louisa, Ky.) 1885-1929, 1909-12-17

news OF THE farm.
Womanly Wisdom

Fresh pork is fine eating, but be
careful that the little folks do NOT
eat TOO much OF it at time; and
maybe you had better take this adj
vice to yourself
To prevent eggs cracking when a
number are placed in boiling water,
let warm water from the faucet run
over them before placing them in
the dish.
A good way to protect a bed OF
tender rose-bushes is to bend them
carefully down to the ground, hold
them in position with stakes, and
then cover with leaves, straw or
earth
Never put pork into barrel that
has the slightest smell or faint
about il. Wash and scrub II clean,
scald it again and again, aud If then
it is not just right, leave it out
where the sun can shine in It a
long time Old Sol Is the greatest
purifier in the world,
For variety one OF these cold
mornings Try this. Feel some large
potatoes and cut little piece of
.one end r With a small knife SCOOP
'oht the inside and fill with Sausage
meat. Replace the top piece lay
',nem in baking dish with bits Of
Dutper sbstweent and salt and pepper
over them, and bake until thorough
ly done. = sa u
The Big Sandy news. [volume] (Louisa, Ky.) 1885-1929, 1909-12-17

To prevent pumps from freezing
Drill a small hole, say one-siyteenth
of an inch or less, in pump stock
below well or cisteTn cover, far
enough down so that frost will not
reach It. with this method the
pump is always primed; and, In
warm weather, all the water that Is
pumped is fresh and cool. If de
sirable to prevent water from vent
in pump striking, wall of well, place
a tin collar around stock, just above
the vent; collar should be five or
six inches wide, flaring out over
vent, and hang just low enough TO
catch the water. ...,-..-............
The best time to break corn stubs
is when it is not far from zero
weather. If a good heavy pole is
used, they will then snap off next
the ground and will give no trouble
next year, as is sometimes the case
when they are poled late in the sea-
son and the weather is only mod
erately cold. Have good strong
pole that will reach across at least
ten rows. Put team on each end.
II the pole is small at one end and
large at the other, make the weight
even for each team by hitching
about foot from the large end,
and about four feet from the small
end of the pole II hot cold enough
to break the stubs all off, first pole
all the stalks down one way, then
turn and pole them back again This
will bring them all down.