davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
HARD QUESTION TO ANSWER
Simple Interrogation That Put Accus-
ing Professor in Rather
Tight Place.

The following story which leaked
out of Yale faculty meeting is also
typical of Waterloo" Wheeler. The
case of fast student was before the
faculty. Though the Yale principle is
TO NEEDLE as little as possible with
The life and morals of the student, in
sisting merely on the rule, keep a
good scholarship stand and be regular
in attendance, still fragrant cases of
misconduct are summarily disposed
of. The student in question had been
seen in the company of a woman of
rather poor reputation and there was
a question of dismissal Lest he be
wrongfully sentenced the cautious
Prof. Ladd, the philosopher, had in
Quired, "Was the young man positive
iy identified?" Oh, yes, the professor
knew the man well; there could be no
mistake about it. Then Prof. Wheeler
looked up quizzically, tapped his spec
tacles against the fingers of his left
hand, . characteristic gesture, and in
quired: "And can the professor also
positively identify the other party ?"-
Bohemian Magazine.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Merry Moments
With Hur1oriists
Benefits of Philosophy
BY RICHARD 8. GRAVES.

asef having observed such other
~sslgars of the human race as have
81 ~ within my sight during the past
~ lars | have come to the conclu-
aat philosophy is a good thing
u " 70 use every day. Too many
g through life without it's bene-
We turn away from it in re-
ance and around the corner meet
gpolntment and regret.
OF us do not know that wis
49, may be extracted from the small
n. ss o. life, and that its application,
I ne humble mustard plaster. often
contentment and peace.
supody would expect to be taught
sasaosophy by hornet, for instance,
s Y hornet can teach it and impress
lesson, although a hornet is
~ little thing. A hornet is but
49, u the great univers e-just
1ssaA In the insect world, with the
1sssat mostly on the last syllable.
20 not remember having seen a
Mose lasting or thorough lesson than
IN one that was taught to me by
hornet.
ilen met the hornet he was on
A.s nest, apparently in a bad frame
" mind. At least he seemed to be
elst way. was not in a hurry, so
& topned to look at him and make an
Investigation as to the cause of his
unnapDiness. I noted his keen glance
aLu angry aspect and they appeared
g pc out of place in one so small and
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Trunk packed?" angrily demand
go Trad Biglow's cousin, now resolved
20 be rid of the aged kinsman's un-
welcome presence.
Trad, disconsolate because there
Was no shelter to receive him, re-
NAMED in the splint-bottom chair and
swallowed convulsively. Then he
pleaded: "Wait moment, Edgar, till
think out in detail that DANCED bar
oaleter of mine. Say, 1900 families
II this section, each buying one for
$3.50 apiece"
Edgar mentally cast up the total,
but wise from past experiences. he
repeated: Trunk ready for the
wagon?"
Giving a profit of $S,70O on the
nrst batch" unused the old man,
lingering that we peddle 'em our
selves
Peddle what?" asked Edgar, forget
ing his resentment enough to take
chair.
Trad cooked his feet on the worn
trunk and replied: why, my Crimi-
nal Barometer was telling you about
By Judas! 1t was Cousin Freeman,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

village elections told three months
ahead. l tried to git it up to five, but
there's a psychology about elections
that's"
what about boss trades?" feverish-
ly obtruded Edgar.
"The hardest problem 1 have" whis-
pered Trad. Il can guarantee only Is
minutes. 1t amt a regular disease
like measles, you see. A man would
have to do his swappin' in sight of it. :"
COR carry it with him." hungrily
suggested Edgar.
Trad pursed his lips and shook his
head and unstrapped the trunk, and
corrected: Hardly! ON account Of
the wires
"Wires?" choked Edgar.
"Wires leading from the electric
motor to the barometer informed
Trad.
do you mean this contraption must
be run by motor?" Numbered Ed
gar.
'By a 75-hoss power non-fexib1e
motor" mildly explained Trad. "But
the householder puts it in and it's
nothing out of your pocket"
Glow much would the motor cost? ''
gritted Edgar.
81 fggered on between $1,10O and
$1,124-"
But the rest was lost as Edgar
c1attered down the attic stairs.
Copyright, 1909, by W. G. Chapman.)
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
BY HUGH PENDEXTER

eff you command it in the name
of duty I s'pose must" sighed Trad.
"And I do" grimly assured Edgar.
NOW what about this barometer?"
Trad combed his whisker thoughtful
ly and explained: my Criminal Bar
ometer prevents crimes, accidents
and sickness. For $3.50 family can
avoid doctors bills and losses"
"How?" gasped Edgar.
eft will look like any barometer,
except on the side will be marked:
Sickness, Fires, Drouths, Brown-Tail
Moths, Potato Rust, Hen Thieves, and
SO on through the scale of all misfor-
tunes. The liquid in giving As hours
warning turns cloudy opposite the
different words.
For instance, you git up in the
morning and find the fluid milky up
to Measles. You've got 4S hours
start of the disease What if it climbs
to Fires? Be careful till it goes down.
A clear tube means ali hunkey dorv.
If the tube registers Horse Thief, jest
keep the barn door shut and your
eyes open"
will it tell about crops?" greedily
asked Edgar.
ut gives six months warning"
readily assured Trad. Outcome of
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
SKIN ROUGH AS BARK.
Baby Boy Had Intense itching Humor
Scratched Till Blood Ran.
Found . Cure in cuticura.

"Our son, two years old, was afflicted
with rash. After he suffered with
the trouble several weeks / took him
to the doctor but it got worse. The
rash ran together and made large
blisters. The little fellow didn't want
to do anything but scratch and we had
to wrap his hands up to keep him
from tearing the; flesh open till the
blood would run. The itching was in
tense. The skin on his back became
hard and rough like the bark of a
tree. He suffered intensely for about
three months. But I found remedy
in Cuticura Soap and Cuticura ONT
ment. The result was almost mag
ical. That was more than two years
ago and there has not been the slight
est symptom of it since he was cured.
]. W. Lauck, Yukon, Okla, Aug. 20
and Sept. II, 1908"
Potter Drug q Chem. Corp, Sole Props, Boston,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
.,.rk.bIe History Of Three Broth
ss =. Born in the Same Aouse' But
All in Different States.

,sontana is believed to possess tnree
,-.,,bers with history more remarA-
&. 80 than has heretofore been known.
. aSls story is vouched for by Col
a, y G. Marshall of Missouri, ne,
n national committeeman from
Montana. ,r...h.,, ..tha+
- historv of the brothes STANDS I'm
sns in the annaiS OF amer
lnan history. That they shodg De porn
~. s the same house. and at same
I. ne = each born in q differen STATE
s,ll0, incredulous, and all tho more
3 so when It is stated that the 30use
y on its original site
6 ..ETbese brothers are named Wright
are now residents of Missfuia
s..s Montana. When the elder OF
II $50 three brothers was porn' that
.s.gs section Of the county vas
& oregon, as portion Of the LOUIS
saga purchase
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Marion St, Manchester, Ia, says:
Constant work at sewing machine
seemed to bring on kidney trouble. The
kidney action was irregular and the
pains in my back and loins so severe
I could hardly endure it. Doan's Kid
ney Pills made me feel better in a
short time, and / took them until en-
tireIy free from my trouble"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N Y.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
BILLS AFFLIcTloN.
Iunorance Aids Appetite.

Merrill E. Gates, secretary of the
board of Indian commissioners, was
describing the splendid work that his
board is doing to wipe out the tuber-
cu1osis scourge which at one time
threatened to make the American In
dian extinct.
but the Indian said Mr.. Gates,
needs to be educated in sanitation.
He is shockingly ignorant there. In
fact, he is as ignorant as an old farm
er used to know in Warsaw.
"a friend dropped in on this old
farmer as he was frying bit of bacon.
Grand bacon, that said the friend.
shifting affably.
"Grand bacon! Well, I guess it is
grand bacon, said the old man, turn
ing the slices in the pan. And it's
none o. yer murdered stuff, neither.
That pig died a natural DEATH -
Washington Post,
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
The House in Three States

Several years later a second boy
was born to the Wright family, but in
the meantime Idaho had been segre-
gated from the original territory, and
therefore he was a antive of Idaho,
and his elder brother was an Oregon
ian.
Again son was born to Mr.. and
Mrs. Wright, but he was neither an
Oregonian nor an Idahoan. but Mon
tanan, the treasure state having been
sliced from Idaho in the meantime
Thus three brothers were born in the
same house and each in different
state.
They are getting along in years,
but the house still stands and is still
occupied by the Wright family"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

not you, who was interested in that.
Fooling with science makes a man
forgit everything else. Excuse me-
If you'll take the hind end
eJust a iiffy," demonstrated Edgar
he eyes narrowing. DO you mean
you've got something Freeman will
invest money in?"
aHe seems anxious that way" con-
fessed Trad, rising and yawning
well, I'm ready"
aTo take your new invention TO
~ nan what never treated you de-
cant accused Edgar, holly. I
.treat YOU like IA brother"
aDon't, Edgar" begged the old man.
ann hold Freeman off and tell you
ahout it when we next meet"
6And SO you'd rush over to Free
lens tonight" cried Edgar, ANY
- .,s scruples about paying me
asvi1ized visit? Unstrap that dlnged
INK you've got to stay here three
.a !, more anyway"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

as he was by the duke of Bedford's
English regency, thought the girl
was very much Ophelia, and wasn't
inclined to listen to her funny talk.
Her first job was to lick the English
at Orleans. She had no cotton-bales
and sand-bags as Jackson had when
he fought the same folks later at New
Orleans, but she had her hat-pin, Of
which, naturally, the British were
slow to see the point She made fire.
quent sallies. At first, being unfa.
miliar with them, she called them
Sarahs. But later she was on better
terms with that mode of warfare.
After awhile the English grew dis.
satisfied with her attacks and went
away from there.
Then she took Charles VII. to
Rheims and had him fitted with a
crown, and thought her checkered ca
reer was done. Isn't my man in the
king-row?" she asked.
They convinced her that the trou-
BILE was only beginning, and that sh >
ought to fight right on.
Eventually she was captured when
she hadn't said Kings ex" or crossed
her fingers and wasn't standing on
wood, and they took her and burned
her at the stake.
Recently a very ignorant friend of
nina in h1Jyyi
remarked that if Joan of Arc had lived
to-day they would have found some
thing cheaper than steak to burn her
at.
1t is terrible not to know how to
SPELL
Copyright, 1909. by ". G. chapman.)
1~~~~-o~~~~~~-~~~.~~~-o~~
began overhauling the soda fountain.
as | am doing now
"But that couldn't have anything ia
do with the town ordinances" replied
the party addressed.
EOu wait minute 1 noticed that
customers who came in looked at me
in queer way, but / did not give
much attention until a constable came
in and informed me that l was under
arrest"
But what for? What had YOU
done?"
"OEerhauled my old soda fountain. j"
"But hadn't you a right to do thai? ?"
"But it was only the middle Of May,
you see."
But what had that to do with it,"
why, / spoiled the sleighing. Yes,
sir, it invited summer to come and
summer came, and the snow and the
sleighing disappearedfu fully two months
before the usual time"
.And you-you-?''
@Oh, / paid the $15 fine and prom.
ised never to do so again, but be.
tween you and me that had good
deal to do with my selling out and
leaving the state
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Medium Sized JOURNEYS
BY STRICKLAND w. GILLIAN.

Joan of Arc was born in Domremy
in 1412, thus carefully antedating the
hipless form, the merry widow hat
and the directoire gown. She knew
there were other matters she would
have to attend to, SO she chose an
age when she wouldn't be bothered so
much to keep up with the style.
She was a peasant girl of honest,
therefore poor, parents, and had to
do the milking. Like other husky
farmers daughters, when Bess would
not &c." Joan would vouchsafe the
old heifer a swat over the perceptives
that would make her sorry she hadn't
died in veal-hood.
Once, just when she had handed
the line-back moody clout in the
flank-steak that would hold her awhile,
she thought she heard someone
speaking to- her. Further investiga-
ton convinced Joan that the speaker
was an angel. This made her apollo
gize to the COW. Further chat with
the angel gave her to understand it
was 81 mlCHaSl, ana at length Sn0
grew so at home in his society she
called him Mike.
The message delivered by this angel
was, go; put on business suit, and
fight for France"
Joan was at first reluctant about
it--not that it would be any unde-
sirable change from milking in fly
time, to real war, but because she
didn't like to wear button
sack-coat and a derby hat But the
voice persisted, so she rolled down
her sleeves, went and bought a suit
and told the French commander she
was ready to enlist.
Naturally the commander, harried
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Ohadience.

Prompt and unquestionfng obedf-
ence is the corner stone of the foun-
dation of success in life. No man can
give orders properly who has not
learned to take them, and "save he
serve, no man may rule" It will be
found that the men who have won
their way to positions of power and
responsibility have invariably been
the men who did not reason or argue
or even respectfully represent" but
who promptly did as they were COM
manded without questioning. It Is
the large man, not the little man, who
recognizes q superior authority.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Couldn't Stand H..

A Raleigh, N. c., woman not long
ago received into her house for train
ing" a Cracker" girl from the noun
tains.
Endeavor was made to ineulcate in
the girl love for order and cleanli-
ness, but suddenly this discipline
ceased, for the poor white" fed to
her home in the Businesses. Thither
the Raleigh woman traced her after
come difficulty.
why did you leave me, Mary
Jane?" she asked.
mis- Morgan, jes' couldn't stay!"
exclaimed the girl. Il was jes' cloyed
with neatness!"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
An innocent Victim.

Speaking of spring" said the drug
gist, as he rested for a moment from
overhauling his soda fountain. Il
bought out a drug store in town in
Vermont few years ago. was a
stranger to the town and its ordi-
nances. About the middle of May
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
A Significant Test.

$50 you don't think the common
people have the nerve to defy those
who seek system of financial OPP
pression?'
st am sure they haven't" answered
Mr.. Sirius Barker. Look at me. I'm
just as sensitive to injustice as any
body. And yet never hesitate about
handing a head waiter comfortable
tip for doing nothing except look
naughty"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
People Talk About Good THINGS.

such preparation as. Powder for the
Feet. To-day after the genuine merits of
Aliens Foot-Ease have been told year after
year by grateful persons, it is Indispens-
able to millions. It is clearly, whole
some, healing and antiseptic and gives
rest and comfort to tired aching feet
It cures while you walk. Over 10000
testimonials. limitations pay the dealer
larger profit otherwise you would never
be offered substitute for Aliens Foot
Ease. the original foot powder. Ask for
Aliens Foot-Ease, and see that you get it..
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Mar.YeI.loual

At a baseball game in Chicago the
gatekeeper hurried to Comiskey, leader
of the White Sox, and said:
"Umpire Hurst is here with two
friends. Shall / pass 'em in?"
can umpire with two friends'
gasped Comiskey. "sure!"-Every-
body's Magazine.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

carried away with me. It was jabbed
into me and permeated my system
thoroughly.
The hornet walked up and down
his beat on the outside of the nest,
like a new policeman, and kept his
eve on me all the time. I cannot
say 1t was a defiant look he gave
me. 1t seemed to be more in the ma
ture of a warning. / think now that
he was saying to me by his actions,
just as plainly as he could have said
in words:
"You tear out of here! Fade away!
Duck!"
Just as I stopped to pick up q
rock the hornet must have said some
thing to the other half million hor
nets inside the nest, concealed thero
without my knowledge or conniVance,
and they came out to see what he
meant. They knew at once that he
meant me, and an instant later 40 OF
so red-hot musket balls struck me.
decided to go away from there imme-
diately, and l think went just as i'm
mediately as anybody of average agil-
ity could have gone.
Time has softened the memory Of
that awful experience, but across the
years comes to me distinct recollec-
ton that l applied the theory OF
cause and effect, perhaps for the
first time in my life AS a result /
tore out. I ducked, and faded away,
or at least l made heroic and frantic
efforts to accomplish all three feats
at one and the same time.
Copyright, 1909, by w. G. Chapman.)
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
The BRIGHT side.

Does Mr. Stormington Barnes try
to look on the bright side Of things?"
asked one actor.
81 should say So" answered the
other. He's never content unless he
is staring the spotlight right in the
face. "-Washingto Star.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Rough on Rats, unbeatable exterminator
Rough on Hen Lice, Nest Powder, 25c.
Rough on Bedbugs, Powder or Liz d, 25e.
Rough on Fleas, Powder or Liquid, rs.
Rough on Reaches, Pow'd, 15c. ,Liq'd, 25c.
Rough on Moth and Ants, Powder, 25c.
Rough on Skeeters, agreeable touse, Csc.
e. s. Wells, Chemist, Jersey City, N. J.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

day. Nne times out
of ten, backache
tells of kidney weak
ness. The only way
to find relief is to
cure the kidneys.
Doan's Kidney Pills
have given sound
strong backs to
thousands of men
and women. Mrs.
Wesley Clemens, 81
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Success.

"Why did you marry?''
For sympathy"
did you get what you were after?"
"Yes-from my friends"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

He who is false to duty breaks .
thread in the loom, and viii find the
flaw when he may have forgotten the
cause.-a. w. Beecher.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

ture of Aguinaldo, or swimming the
Bagbag.
It is not wise to look bald hornet
in the face at close range and make
grimaces at him. That is one chunk
of wisdom / tore off that day and
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
A Lucky Mischance,

"At the last moment Fakem lost his
nerve"
"Then pray kind fate that nobody
else will ever find it."
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Sunburnt EyeIids.

Who does not know the misery of sun
burnt eyelids-that crinkly and burning
condition of the skin? Isn't it worth
great deal to know that DR.. Mitchell's
Eye Salve applied to them upon retiring
will effect complete cure before morning.
On sale everywhere. Price 25 cents or by
mail, Hall & Ruckel, New York City.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
To Check Spread Of Trachon1a.

To Check Spread Of Trachoma.
It has been reported that the dis
ease known as trachoma, or granular
eyelids, has been spreading rapidly
among the Indians. To check this
trouble congress appropriated $4,000,
placing it in the hands of the commits
sioner of Indian affairs. for the imme-
date investigation and treatment Of
the disease and to check its spread.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

If you would criticise your boss get
fully mile away from everybody.
then whisper to yourself.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
For Colds and erIpp-capudine.

The best remedy for Gripp and Colds is
Hicks Capudine. Relieves the aching and
feverishness. Cures the cold-Headaches
also It's Liquid Effects immediately-10,
Is and SOC at Drug Stores.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Mrs. windows Soothing Syrup.
For children teething, softens the gums reduces In
dammation, alays PAIN cures wind eoiio 2c bottle
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

A glittering success-the solitaire
engagement ring.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
PITY FOR THE ToELER.

81 hear, Limpy, dat de price of Twin
has increased
yep. Gee, it must be tough to
have to work for wot Teller eats
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Red. weak. weary. yvnterx Eyes

Relieved by Murine Eye Remedy. Com
pounded by Experienced Physicians. Mu-
rine Doesn't Smart: Soothes Eye Pain.
Write Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago,
for illustrated Eye Book. At Druggists.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
BURDENS LIFTED
From Bent Backs.

A bad back is heavy handicap to
those of us who have to work every
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
RuIina Passion.

Hes half crazy about music"
Sure is. Even calls his price list
a scale of prices
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

DR.. Biggers Huckleberry Cordial Never Fails.
To cure Children Teething, Bowel Troubles,
etc. At Druggists 25c and SOC per bottle.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Over fifty years Of public confidence
and popularity That is the record of
Hamlins Wizard Oil, the worlds stand
ard remedy for aches and pains. There's
a reason and only one-MERIT.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

Some marriages mean war and some
mean an armed truce.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Cor Anv Disease az Iniurv Ia

the eye, use PETTITS EYE SALVE, alb
solutely harmless, acts quickly, DE. All
druggists or Howard Bros, Buffalo. n. Y.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
ananorfanf "a RRn4lnara.

important TO MOfE1ePes
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORlA a safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that it
Signature lIMHzlzsm
In Use For Over 30 Years.
The Kind You Have Always Bought.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26
Not Exclusive,

INUL EXCLUSIVE
''Was it an exclusive party?"
mot at all. Some of her relatives
were there"
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1909-06-26

other insignificant. He reminded me of an
have army officer returning from the cap