The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1909-04-17

that the new $40 gold pieces will not stack We
suggest that he try the experiment himself we
shall be pleased to publish the results
Sometimes fellow who thinks he choose
between two evils discovers that the lesser evil is
mite bad enough. and that he should have chosen
neither.
A news dispatch from Waco, Tex. says fellow
got five years in the pententiary for going through
mock marriage ceremony. He will now have
time to ponder on the sacrcdness of mai 'age.
As harbinger of spring. however, the first
Robin is somewhat of a failure.
All clouds may have silver lining, but it is a
heap more comforting to have silver dollar IN
your pocket.
The industry of hens is commendabe. Not
withstanding the reduced price at which their pro-
duct is selling. they keep right on the Job.
In their efforts to preserve the peace. the police
ought to try little benzoate of soda on it.
The country is suffering just with tariff re-
vision And they call it the Payne bill.
The country no more than gets settled from the
change in administrations than the baseball season
opens up.
Bicycle riders in Salt Lake do not have to be
as unkempt as Richard III to have the dogs bark
at them as the ride along the street.
Sometimes when fellow doesn't know what to
do he might read the constitution of the United
| States with profit.
The marshal of Baltimore estimates that 10000
persons in his city are pisto-toters. And Balti-
more is supposed to be in the civilized portion of
the country.
The amethyst is said to be the fashionable stone
for 1909. But that does affect the price of that
new Easter hat.
But, on the other hand it would not be a real
genuine, old-fashioned spring if the weather we're
not as unpleasant as possible.
An income tax would play havoc with the pre-
tentious front of the ballroom boys, anyway.
However, if wishes were horses, there wouldn't
be any beggars.
The visible supply of coal in the bin is of far
more Importance to the consumer than the knowl-
edge that the worlds supply will be exhausted in
century or two.
It's peculiar fan that hasn't picked out club
which he believes will land the penant
-~-~-~
1t must be the stray dog pound has been de-
stroyed else where could all the mongrel ours which
wander the streets come from?
Still, that tired feeling can be overworked con-
siderably in furnishing excuses for not doing the
things you ought to do
It's all right about the April showers bringing
May flowers, but what do the April SHOWS bring9
->~-~-
Optimism is the way fellow feels about some
thing which he wishes wouldn't turn out the way
he expects.
About this time it is wise head that goes to
the coal man and pays his bill He may need some
more before the seasons done
Notwithstanding that the Easter hat looked we'll
there is hdeous experience coming with the Nav
1st BILL
A good woman in Philadelphia has been tell
ing people how to grow old. Surely people in
Philadelphia do not age as rapidly as they do in
other strenuous cities
A proposed law in Wisconsin requires all topers
to.wear red button two inches in diameter Why
not make them wear a Scotch plaid suitl
IL would be interesting to know Just how
many times the STANDARD Oil oo,Dno-.- l.. -