Ladysmith news-budget. [volume] (Ladysmith, Rusk County, Wis.) 1907-1927, 1909-09-02

cred small square of paSteboard
With far greater agitation than moves
he professional stock-gambler who
of thousands. he examined the little
card. 1t bore the imprint of an m"
Somehow the Man could not fix his
mind on his business. A little leaven
had leavened his whole lump.
Queer things transpired at the Of
fee within the next week or so. Each
| morning the Man appeared with two
or three packages under his arm, and
yet he never took any bundles away
with him. The boy was sent so often
to various downtown groceries for
Predigested Oats that he confided to
the janitor his fear that the boss was
turning into a horse. The janitress
ENORMOUSLY complained that a poo:
woman's life wasn't worth living, the
way No. 242 Uttered up his carpet day
after day with that brownish powdery
stuff that was so hard to sweep out
The Man himself began to get
cramped for room. His desk was full
of oats His coat and overcoat had to
be laid over the back of chair dur
ing the day-the clothesloc
were crowded with square boxes. The
stationery closet was bullying with
predigestion.
There comes point when the addi
ton of one little straw to the camePs
burden brings that faithful animal to
an untimely end In desperation the
Man one day bought dozen packages
| of the detested oats at one fell swoor,
and found within them dozen dupli
Gates of letters he already had, but
no "Y"
"This game is an Internal swindle,"
he cried, hurting a shower of oats and
cartons through the open window
into the light-shaft. "By the Great
Horn Spoon, | don't believe there ever
was W in any of their boxes! It's
robbery, but they tried their game on
the wrong man when they tackled
me. I'll see whether there's any law
in this land!"
Determined to strike while the iron
was hot, the Man telephOned to his
attorney, who roasted several stories
| higher in the same skyscraper, ask
| ing him to stop in on his way to
lunch. Within an hour the lawyer
appeared, and listened attentively to
| invested vast sums on the represen-
| tations of the cereal manufacturers.
| and OF how much evidence she had
acquired by purchase Of the absence
| of an essential letter from the pack
ages In thus setting forth the case
the Man deemed 1t irrelevant and I'M
| necessary to mention his CWn pur-
chases. For the sake of convenience
he simply added his expenditure to
| hers and represented the sum total as
her outlay.
''Now, tell me, Galloway" he con-
cluded lis there no way of getting
back at these people? Couldn't we
get at them through the postal laws,
| if by no other procedure? Are they
to go on robbing the public indefi-
nitely?"
Well" said the lawyer, pressing
his finger-tips together refectively, Il
could tell better if I were acquainted
with the exact terms of the company's
offer. | suppose they are printed on
the package. Couldn't you bring down
| a carton tomorrow"
| Certainly Come to think of it,
| believe | have one of their old boxes
down here somewhere Let me see
| 1rrIa n To
| am-just look on top of that book
case, won't you?"
AS Galloway turned his back to
grope for the carton on the book
case, his client hastily slid open
drawer of his desk, grabbed the top
| home.
ooh, here it is had it in my desk"
he said, passing it to the attorney.
The latter lad the printed PROPOSE
ton carefully and glanced over the
| top of his spectacles at the would-be
litigant.
What did you say was the missing
letter." he asked.
'It is ""
"'Y? Where does ~ come -"
"In Prettyman's, of course. Pref
t-Y-m-a-n-s''
The lawyer looked at him SUSPECT
ously. You're not trying to josh
ae, are your he asked. =.
Plainly the Man was puzzled.
"See here" said the lawyer; with
out prejudice to your general intelli-
gence, it seems to me that in this par
ticular instance you've been making
monkey of yourself. Here is Pretti-
mans spelt in letters an inch high on
the carton-P-r-e-t-t-I-m
The client took the box incredulous-
| ly and looked for himself. His face
| was very red He tossed the package
a foot or two in the air, and as it de-
scended he met it half way with a
kick that sent it hurting to the cell
ing. where it smashed three globes on
the chandelier and produced snow
storm of oats that would have made
the stage manager of an Uncle Toms
Cabin company turn green with envy
And the lawyers fee was SIS
Do you think that Man went home
and made a full confession to his
wife? Not he. He "cashed in" what
letters he had acquired, gave the
clocks to the stenographer and book
keeper. made an exaggerated pretence
IF discovering his Wife's error all by