The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1909-04-26
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 That sigh meant a lot. It was the reaction from an inward struggle. All day she had been suffering from the dominance of two opposing ideas be- tween which her inward nature sway ed pendulum-wise. This inward na- ture" comprised her mind. her. reason, her intelligence. her fears. her hopes hey desires-the whole mechanism and paraphernalia of her emotional and speculative psychology. She would fain have gone out boldly into the garden and there met MT. Hardy face to face-of course by pure accident. But this vague intention was com bated by a maiden fear; one of those delicious. conscious apprehensions made to be combated unless thorough ly supported by collateral forces; one of those gentle fears of sex which makes yielding so sweet. Following this came the fixed intention of that walk and its apprehenSive possibilities not really fear them at all for she had privately made up her mind that, fear or no fear. she was going on that walk. The only point left open was it's direction. The hour was positively settled; an hour earlier than that at which for the past few days she had driven out with Daddy! Even to her self she would not admit that her
 
 trolled influenced by the fact that it was the same hour about which MT. Hardy made his appearance in the garden.
 But all the same her thoughts and her intentions were becoming con- scious. For good or evil she was get ting more reckless in her desires: pas sion was becoming dominant-and she knew it.
 This is perhaps the most dangerous nh of me ioI hn lynn that there is at work a growing desire for self-surrender which it is her duty to combat. She knows that all contra reasons which can be produced will be must be-overcOme. She knows with all the subtle instincts of her sex that she is deliberately setting her feet on 8 slope down which some impulse. per- haDs but momentary. will carry her with resistlesS force It is the prepara- tory struggle to defeat: the clearing away of difficulties which might later be hampering or even obstructive: the claimant wish for defeat which makes for the conQured the satisfaction if not the happiness of finality. To all chil- may come. To the strongest and most resolute warrior must be moment when he can no more: when the last blow has been struck and the calling of another world is ringing in his ears; to the resolute amongst men this mo- ment is the moment of dream. To wo- man it is surrender of self: surrender to the embrace of eath-or to the em- brace of Love. It is the true end of the battle The test is but the carry ing out of the Treaty of Peace, the Triumph of the Victory in which she is nov proud to have a part-if it be only that of captive!
 There was no sleep for Joy that night. She heard the hours strike one after the other, never missing one. She was not restless. She lay still. and quiet, and calm; patient with that patti ence which is an acceptance that what is to come is good In all the long vigil she never faltered in her inten- ton to take that walk in the forenoon What was to happen in it she did not guess. She had a conviction that that tall figure would follow her discreetly 1; and that when she was alone they would somehow meet. It might be that she would hear his voice before she saw him: that was most likely, not turn till he had spoken or at any rate till she knew that he was close behind her. Here her thoughts would stop. She would lie in might come after that would be happi- ness. She would see Him look into His eyes. LOOK at me Joyr' seemed to sound in her ears in sweet low music like a whisper Then she would close her eyes and lie mo- tionless. passive. breathing as gently as a child; high-Strung. conscious, awake and devoid of any definite intent.
 When she was dressing for the day she put on one of the simplest and prettiest of her dresses. one which she had directed over night to be got ready; a sort of heavy guaze Of dull white which fell in long full folds showing her tall slim figure to it's per feet grace. Her maid who was a some what silent person, not given to volu- bility unless encouraged, looked at her admiringly as she said:
 "I do not miss that is the most be- pleased her and sent red glow through her cheeks. Then, fearing ii she seemed to think too much of the matter it might seem suspicious as to some purpose. she said quietly:
 ''Perhaps then it would be better if I put on one of the lawn dresses. I am going for a walk this morning and as it may be dusty a frock that will not catch the dust may be better
 ''It does seem a pity miss to wear such a pretty frock and soil it when there is no one here to see 1t; not even your father" This gave Joy ans open ing of which she quickly availed her self. She had not the least intention of changing the frock or of looking. if she could avoid it. one whit below her best.
 "Fie Eugenie. one doesn't put on frocks to attract. If you think that 
 get dusty'' The Abigail who was a privileged person answered gravely:
 That's quite true, Miss, exactly as you say it. One doesn't put on nice frocks to attract: and that one is your self. But all the rest dor' Joys merry laugh showed the measure of her ebul- Iient happiness.
 Dear me! Eugenie. You are quite an orthoepist-indeed preciss1on1st. l shall have to polish up my grammar However I'll keep on the frock if only in compliment to your sense of ter minological exactitude!'
 A little after breakfast. when the time Cor starting on the walk drew nigh, Joy did not feel so elated. Wom- an-1ike she was not anxious to begin It was not that she was suffering from the nervousness which comes to those of high strung temperameHtS in mo- mentous crisis. Running merrily she put on her hat and finished her toilet for her walk. In the sitting room from