Iowa County democrat. [volume] (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1877-1938, 1909-07-29
WOES OF THE PURSER
He Has Troubles of His Own on
the Trip Across the Atlantic.
MUST HAVE A GOOD TEMPER.
His Time Wasted by Foolish Cues
tons and Trivial Appeals, Mainly by
Women Passengers, Yet He Has to
Be Always Polite and Agreeable.

happened to be taking Il trip from Iiv-
erpool to New York, I'VE have our
own troubles, l can assure you, and |
sometimes envy the captain his soil,
tary enjoyment of the bridge, even
seem to think that the purser is put
on ship simply to answer foolish
questions.
"Of course there is a good deal
which we have to put up with as be-
ing part of our legitimate duties,
though when 4 passenger brings us 4
hundred dollar yellow back and asks to
have it changed into English, French.
German and Spanish money and Stipu-
lates that there must be twice as much
French as German and half the re-
mainder in English silver coins, pre-
sumably for tips, is it any wonder that
we occasionally lose our tempers?
''And then, again, the purser is al
ways appealed to for the most trivial
things. \ woman passenger comes to
the window, and if it is closed she will
bang on it till it is opened, no matter
IL INC sly Ii Is JIiGlS us luI SG us IIlc lISlt
the office hours are from II to and 4
to o'clock and she is hOnOring me
with Il call at p. III. Then, when the
window is raised for fear she will
smash it to Smithereens, she says,
with Il sws2t smile: oh, Mr.. Purser,
l am so sorry to disturb you. l know
it is not your hour of business, but
could you tell me if we will really
land next Thursday, as | told my
brother we would, and l know he will
be waiting for me on the dock
"Of course l am polite, but | have
some difficulty i'll persuading her that
l am not running the ship, and neither
can l control the clements. She goes
away with an expression that clearly
shows she thinks I am keeping some
thing back and it will be my fault if
we do not arrive at the time appointed.
81 remember on one trip when the
weather was particularly stormy a
woman passenger knocked at my door
after office hours, of cOurse-and
begged that she might speak to me for
a few minutes. | politely asked her
to enter, and then, her eyes starting
out of her head with the excitement of
suppressed emotion, she implOred me
to draw up her will. l protested that
1 was not lawyer, but do you think
she would be satisfied with that ex-
cuSe? Not much. There and then
had to draw up Il document in the
best legal phraseology L could muster
when it was finished and | and my
assistant had signed it she gave the
young fellow a sovereign for his trou,
bic, and as for Newell, she took of
a very handsome ring and insisted on
my accepting it. l have that ring yet
but what became of the donor | never
knew, for when the storm aDated and
we were safe in port she never sc
much as babe me gOOdby, though
had repeatedly asked her to take back
her ring She was very rich woman
evidently, and the 'bequests' in that
will 1 drew up made my eyes bulge.
"MOSt passengers when we have beer
a day or so out bring the purSer al
their vaIuabIes, for which they receive
a receipt Some nervous women seen
to think that a 'strO ~ room at sea is
not a very secure place for their jew
els, and they insist on seeing theil
treasures at least every day. One WON
an passenger made my life a burden
during a recent voyage by taking hel
vaIuables out and putting them il
again three times a day until l told hel
that the next time she called for then
I would not take them back again
whereat she told me, with a sour look
that / was impertinent and she WoulC
inform the captain. | believe she die
so, but the captain gave her word OF
two of advice regarding the implicit
trust which should be placed in
purser, and this quoted her. In fact
she afterward came to me and apollo
gized for her seeming rudeness.
LAS a rule, | conduct church service
on board, as the captain does not en-
Joy the work, but prefers to remain OF
the bridge Many a funeral service
also has fallen to my lot, and have
even Officiated at a christening. | an
usually the one to whom a passenger
flies when he is dissatisfied with hi!
cabin, though the duty of changing ;
staterOom really rests with the heaC
steward. Then, again, it is the purse
who is appealed to when the passen
gers elect to hold a concert, and thu
young folks usually rush to him alsC
when they want to have a dance OF
deck. A purser can be very popula
or the reverse, and unless you have al
excellent temper you stand a gooC
chance Of being the reverse.
"The funniest experience | had was
on a recent trip, when there was OF
board a little girl about twelve year:
old. She struck up warm friendship
with me and would walk the deck fol
miles if l would only accompany her
She fell very i'll during storm anC
refused to be comforted. Her mother
asked her if there was anything she
could do which would ease her suffer
ing, and the young imp said there was
If she would only 'skidOo' and let the
purser read a book to her she would
feel better And the indulgent mother
came to me, stated the case, and-well
/ complied with her request and read
to the child for little while each day
until she was well enough to come or
deck again. "--London Tit-Bits.