The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1909-09-24

''>>>>>>> i "
Mack-When were Won
Dyer-Just about six checkhoo,s ''ed'
Puck. ago.
He's a nice chap to tako
fishing, must say" why WIN. s'l
he do?" "He fshed"- I'D
Courier-Journal. '''lls
Did she refuse him.? "pract,o,u-
she said she would not NARY ::
till he arrived at years of djscrs.; A''a
Brooklyn Life. 0u
Father-And so your teacho.
dead. Sonny-What's the ooos "
that while the school is still thor,,
Meggendorfer Blatter.
What sort of a chap is he~ .w.,
he's one of these fellows who tbins
that anything mean is a joke y !.
isn't on him."-Cleveland Leader
He-Love me and the world :,
mine. She-How do you mako ~.
out? He-Why,. aren't you al, ,h'
world to me?-Baltimore American
Mr.. Rocks Ito chauffeur who h.,
lost control Of machine)-Can v0n
stop her? Chauffeur-No. Mr. Ro.t.
We'll, then, run her into sometbin,
cheap.
Redd-Have you ever timed vor.
automobile? Greene-Oh, yes =
stood perfectly still for forty.ejsb,
minutes on the road to-day!-Youkers
Statesman.
Helen-Ruth was afraid the girls
wouldn't notice her engagement rim,
Grace-Did they? Helen-Did thew,
Six of them recognized it at once
Evening Lamp.
"Sir, I want to marry your
daughter" "Go slow, young man, 20
slow. When I was your age wanted
just as badly to marry her mother"
Baltimore American.
The Heiress-Do you think that
more tall men marry than short ones?
The Hunter think men who are
short are the ones who marry most
frequently.-Town Topics.
Mary-I'm positive Fred loves me
and intends to make me his wife.
Helen-Why? Has he proposed yeti
Mary-No. But he dislikes mother
more every time he sees her
Jugend.
Magistrate-You say you want
divorce because your married life is
one long series of fights. You don't
look it. Would-Be Divorce-No, your
honor; but you ought to see my wife,
Circle.
Conductor Con railroad train
This isn't the right ticket, sir. At
sent Minded Passenger-What's the
matter with it? Conductor-Tnls
ticket calls for diamond ring
Philadelphia Bulletin.
She-She told me you told her that
secret l told you not to tell her He
The mean thing! l told her not 70
tell you 1 told her. She-l promised
her l wouldn't tell you she told Ill.,
50 don't tell her I told you.-Bost0A
Herald.
Miss Coopah-Why, nah Ian, If defe
amt Pete Broker! Whar he git den
cloe's? Miss Sinclair-S-s-s-s-h'
course, dere ain no tellin', but TOT 10
las two weeks Pete's done bin De nlsu.
Waterman in a big gents clothln
store.-Puck.
Mrs. Crawford-You say 1t Is ILL
possible to get any money out Oh WV.
husband. Have you gone about II IL
tho right way? Mrs. CRAFTSMAN.
I've tried everything, my dear, eAe'p'
sending him a Black Hand ie'''''
Brooklyn Life.
Mr.. slimpsure CATER declasu ~ -
fusaO-I know what the ma'''' ID
It Is because I'm poor. you WV" ~0u
marry me If l were rich. MISS oa ~,u
Observation-Disclosures So Wv 49,
would have to be very, very '''
New York Weekly. 49,,
"Im sure 1 don't know why s
call this hotel The Palms. w ,..r
I've never seen a palm anywhere s,tore
the place" you'll see them O0 s;.s
Won 20. It's a pleasant little surpi ,ss
the walters keep for the gues,s ~
last day of their stay."-puch'
"Alas!" confessed the penl,en' ,olo a
sin a moment Of weakness ! '' mi,
carload Of brass fittings. IL the
mont Of weakness?" exclaimed sn
Judge Goodness, man! what w., "S in
YOU have taken if you had ylela sr-
a moment when you felt s'r0D'
Boston Globe.
A small boy was hoeing corn ID
sterile field by the roadside @ .pears
passerby stopped and saiu. small
to me your corn is rather 1., dvsrt
Certainly" said the boy " "Cer.
corn" 'But it looks yaiie,. sind'
tainly. We planted the yall. ,an't get
.Bm It looks as If you Wou,u1 .ourss
more than half crop. =. hsr
not" said the boy. I'VE p m,hune.
On shares."-Detroit News-lr'0'
" $500 .hot It is usr