The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-03-07

Lsmart set. Seems He'd just got the
| thing in workin' order. and the nephew
was out maxim a call for volunteers.
| Well, we didn't know what it was al
/ about: but we pushes into the lib'Ty
/ with d lot Of others and takes a look.
/ The professor, he's a big, husky lOokin'
| German highbTOw. with a fine set of
/ rosy face whissers and a Dave War
/ field accent. On the table he has some
/ thing that looks like a brass barrel
/ head set on a lot of little steel balls. St
/ it would move easy. Underneath was
/ some clockworl, and a sheet of ruled
paper that has a pencil workin' over
/ it His game is to have some one rest
their hand on the brass plate while he
asks 'em string of fool questions.
Pinckney, he's the first victim, and the
performance runs something like this:
I gif you the vordt cherry" says
the professor, pullin' out a stop watch.
Vat does that pring to your mindt?'
Cocktail" says Pinckney, prompt
and cheerful.
Now I gif you the vordt dinner, ~
says the professor. "Of vat does that
Another cocktail" says Pinckney.
''Ach!" says the professor. Vat a
loafly imachinationl Vonce more, nowl
I gif you the vordt Club Vat, if you
please, does
MUTE COthldtlSF says L AllChIst9-
BAH" says the professor, shown
back his watch. such a foolishness!
To broberly conduct this experiment 1
must have a prain, not a thirst
"Oh, Lu;u." says 1. Now will you
be good?"
But the professor amt grOuchy about
it. He goes on to explain how the ma
chine works. and it would have been
mighty interestin', 1 expect, if you could
Z
though. that if he had some sort of a
crook to work on he could put him
through course of sprouts that would
make him write a record of his confess
1 sion without KNOWN it. Kind of an au-
/ tomato detective the thing was, ac-
/ cordin' to his description.
! Vat is truly neededt, you see" says
/ he, is a susbected CRIMINAL
"Oh. 1 sayi" says Pinckney "And
| suppose the suspected person should be
innocent; would the machine prove
that, too?"
"Shust the same" says he.
by Jovei" says Pinckney. "PTofes-
! sor, are you game to try that on?''
! Was he2 He's no sooner been put
wise to the details of this gold purse
/ case than he begins rubin his hands
and smilin' like a kid that's been in
vited to a picnic. Inside a couple of
| minutes ne says he got his SGnefne all
/ laid out, and just then we hears a gig
| gle-and in floats Dottie Decker.
| 'Oh, what a funny layout" squeals
/ Dottie. What's the game? Can't
/ play?"
Say, it couldn't have been worked
/ slicker if it had been planned a month
ahead. Another minute and Miss Deck
CT is in the chair, and the professor.
stop watch out, is putting her through
/ the third degree
/ To most of US it SOUNDS Just plain
dippy. He gives out a string OF words,
/ like fan" dog" candy" and 50 on,
and she comes back with the words
( they made her think Of one at a time.
But in amongst the lot are some jokers
| The first was bridge whist" 1t don {
bother her much. She just laughs and
comes back with Making it without. +"
| When he gets to purse" she fiushes
up little and says, "Why-er-empti-
ness, of counsel"
"Ah!" says he, snappin' the watch
/ Pretty soon he. comes to "dressin'
table," and that's a jab that gets her
| still more fused. See mis- scheme? In
| amongst the other words ne has all the
connectin' links of the tragedy. And
say. hanged if it didn't give me the
lumpy throat. standin' there listenin' to
| her gettin' tangled up In snarli For
| It's plain as day that she's gettin I'M
easy. First she turns red ana then
white, and them big eyes of hers rolls
around the crowd in kind of a scared,
helpless wa that slffe had me goin'.