Evening journal., 1909-08-10
THE CORPSE THAT
KNEW THE LAW,
BY z. A. MICHEL.
Copyright. 1909, by American Press Asso-
ciationl

far westerly region he Inhabited for
having as many lives as a cat. Thrice
he was left for dead after alter
cations. and four times in illness the
doctors gave him up. Once he tum-
bled Off n cliff a hundred feet high.
was caught on the limbs of a tree and
landed on his feet without a scratch
But now Wakefield was dead. There
had been altogether too much shoot
ing in Paradise, and the people re-
solved to stop it. Wakefield was the
next man to shoot some one. and the
committee. wishing TO make an exam
pie Of him and fearing that II they
looked into the matter they might run
against case Of self defense or some
thing OF the kind. though they gave |
him trial. did not take the trouble to
summon witnesses for the defense. /
But, being law abiding men, they were
very particular that the court routine |
should be observed even to asking the |
culprit If he had anything to say why
sentence should not be passed upon
him. He replied that he had been n
lawyer in the better days and could
I
rest in the grave.
And so be passed out. He was
changed by the neck until he was
dead" and papers we're on file to show
that he was physically and legally
corpse. The case would have been for
ever closed had not a young doctor
! who had reversed the usual course by
beginning practice and studying after
ward stolen him from his grave
Wakefield came to life in a warm
room, espied a bottle, stimulated him
self and when the doctor came back
to cut him up was just setting the
glass down on a table.
Wakefield. being fiat broke" offered
for 500 TO refrain from informing OF
the doctors breach Of the law. The
doctor refused the offer. aud Wakefield
sued him for interfering with his law
ful sepulcher. Since Wakefield was le-
gally dead the committee did not see
how they could deprive him of lif'
But they granted him n trial Of his
suit against the doctor. In which the
claimant laid the damages at $1,000
About that time a lawyer came from
an eastern law school and hung out
his shlngle The doctor retained him
Wakefield stated bis case in court thus:
your honor. am legally a corps,
Z and this case must be tried on such
grounds Death. according TO the law.
separates n man from all his earthly
possessions except his body. Ii is a
maxim Of common law that there can
be no property in a corpse-that is. no
one living can own 1t. My corpse is
my own property
"I claim" interrupted the opposing
counsel. that the plaintiff is Wake
fields ghost. Since he places his case
on technicalitics will do the same
! Let him prove that he is not disem
bodied spirit"
ut is not necessary" replied the
plaintiff "The law takes no cogni.
zance of ghosts. When a man is dead
the law says that he shall stay dead
His apparition has no standing in
court. though his body has
at is the duty Of the common law"
the claimant went on. ito protect the
repose Of the dead The law holds
that the corpse, being the owner Of It.
self before death, possesses certain
rights over itself after it becomes
dead. Every corpse has the inalienable
right to six feet Of ground to he buried
IN and the right of being buried. The
law holds the owner of the premises
on which a man dies responsible for
his burial. This corpse died on grounds
under the Jurisdiction Of the courts.
The courts buried it. and the courts
are responsible for its being left un-
touched IN its grave"
"Your honor" interrupted opposing
counsel. 1.-THE law gives no civil rem.
edy for the stealing of a body. for there
is no property right in a corpse to give
any one right TO recover in a court
for violation of sepulcher"
The learned counsel" pursued the
claimant, should insert the word 'liv
ing l admit that no living person
has a right to recover for violation Of
4 sepulcher That right is vested in the
\ corpse. But in previous cases the corps
has not come into court to claim ii
rights. A civil action may be brought
for breaking and entering a place
> where the body is buried. the same
; constituting a trespass. for which
damages can be recovered. The Law
has often interfered TO protect the
rights Of us corpses. And as no one
can own any body except his own Nc
one can remove n body without the
courts permission. which can only bs
granted In behalf Of the body itself.
/ Having shown your honor that th'
defendant is only accountable to me
corpse. and that he has willfully in
terfered- with my rest in the grave. has
brought me back to a life that is irk
some to me. ask that he be con
manded by the court 10 pay me the
damages claimed"
The judge looked at the defendant
counsel. but he was so dazed by the
remarkable legal knowledge on thI
part Of a corpse that he could no
think of a single argument in rebuttal
He collapsed.
At this point a stranger in thosi
parts arose and said TO his honor:
Il am Judge Tatterton Of the ST
preme court OF - and travelling T.
your county. Permit me TO say tina
the points stated by the plaintiff arr
legally correct in every particular"
Judgment for the plaintiff," sai'