Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1909-11-19
LASHES
XlS5s91@oEE6n

I've never known a woman yet who
wished she was 40" Il have-she was
50.'-Boston Transcript.
Stella-Did he say he loved you in
so many words? Bella-Yes, sever.
teen pages.-New York Sun.
rs she making him a good wife?"
We'll, not exactly; but she's making
him a good DISQUALIFICATION An
swers.
Bluff look upon you. sir, as a ras-
cal. Biff-You are privileged to look
upon me in any character you desire
to assume-Vogue.
He-You don't know how nervous
l was when I proposed TO you. She
And you don't know how nervous I
was until o did so.
Mrs. Church-You say she was a war
correspondent once? Mrs. Gotham
Yes, she was secretary of a woman's
club.-Yonkers Statesman.
WHO gave the bride away?" Her
little brother. He stood up right in
the middle of the ceremony and yell
ed, 'Hurrah, Fanny, you've got him at
last!''-Tit Bits.
But you spent enough money On
me before We were married" protested
his wife. True, my dear" replied her
husband. Il had it to spend them
Chicago Daily News.
Mrs. Sauers-l don't consider mar
riage a lottery. DO you? Mr.. Sauers
Nj -,ne L., -, :. hl,ulr sr a
lottery he can tear it up II take an.
other chance.-Puck.
Visitor-Can you read the past?
Fortune Teller-Certainly; that's my
business. Then l wish you'd tell me
what it was my wife told me to get
Tor her."-Boston Globe.
What is your idea of happiness?"
To be able to spend my own money
just as if ! were going to turn in an
expense account when | got home
Chicago Record-Herald
She offered an explanation OF her
fearful mood. i've been to a wed.
ding" she said. Il always cry more
at a wedding han l do at a funeral.
It's so much more uncertain"
Patience-She says she married him
to reform him. Beatrice-And he says
he was a fool when he married her.
We'll, she says she hasn't reformed
him a bit."-Yonkers Statesman.
He-I wonder if we can get along
all right. She-Certainly. We can
buy the auto with the money father
left me and you will surely make
enough to pay for running it, don't you
think?
Leading Tragic Man-Did you see
how I paralyZed the audience in the
death scene? They We're crying all
over the house! Stage Manager-Yes,
they knew you weren't really dead
Tit-Bits.
Al used a word in speaking to
my wife which offended her sorely a
week ago. She has not spoken a syl-
liable to me since. B-Would you
mind telling me what 1t was?-Fleig
ende Blaetter.
rs there any difference i'll the mean.
Ing Of the words nautical and ma
rine'?' asked Mr.. MalaprOp. Not
nUch,' replied Mrs. Malaprop. "One is
cinnamon of the other."-Chicago
Record-Herald.
Am ! the first girl you ever loved?"
Your question pains me-" Forgive
me-" Yes; I had flattered myself
that there was nothing amateurish
about my Observation-Disclosures
CourierJournal.
Mrs. Peachblow-Why does u
husband carry such a tremendous
amount of life insurance when he's in
such perfect health? Mrs. Flicker
Oh, just 10 tantalize me. Men are nat
urally cruel-Life.
Jack sent me a handsome mirror
for my birthday" "Oh, that accounts
for it." Accounts for what?" Yes
terday he asked me if a woman ever
got too old to be pleased with a look.
ing glass."-Boston Transcript.
No, Mr.. Sparks, l can never marry
you. You lave no consideration for
the feelings of my mother" why,
what makes you think that?' you
hung your hat over the keyhole be-
fore you started TO propose to me-
Cleveland Leader.
UndertakeT-You will, of course.
tide in the first coach with VI
mother-in-laW? Widower-Is that alb
s~olutely necessary? Undertaker-Oh.
yes, certainly; it is the correct thing.
| Widower-Then all I can say Is that
ny whole days enjoyment is spoilt!
English Clcr2yman-And when you
,r-ivc in London, my lear lady, dout
all to sec st. Paul's and Westminster
Abbey. Fair AInerican-You bet; III
.attIe those off sure; but what I've
| ,cen laundering to see, ever since I was
! snee-high to n grasshopper, is the
Church OF England Punch.
She-Oh, Jack, do excuse me for
getting here so late. You Door fel.
low, you've had to wait an hour for
! me. He-Oh, no. it's all right. I've
only just come. She (sharply)-What!
/ So that's the way you treat me. Is
it? If I'd come at the time agreed
you'd have made me wait a whole