The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-09-26

proverhial post was quite as deaf At last gun battery dashed up, tore away her front stoop, as 1t were, and launched all six 12-pound Napoieons deadly Ire at the enemy. whose mus ket balls battered the cabin like hail on the roof. The sound of the guns must have produced the impression on the old soul that some visitor had knocked at her door. for she called out, without suspending her work, and In the trembling querrelous tones or the aged. Come in'"
 Let a citizen come along with beaver hat then he would wish him self dead. because the first hail would be- Say, mister, have you got the wipers for that concern in your headT' Some times smart Alex" anxious to show on" before the girls would guy back. One of these Gener- al D. H. Hiil. In his magazine pub lished just after the war. relates and the result. A regiment of tar heels" halting to rest in a town was set upon by g well gotten up dude. who was amusing the ladies with his sharp cross talk. when "butternut" clad, and battered old veterans called out, Say, you. mister in the pink shirt was you raised here or bought out in a drove"
 Ohicers Take . Hand.
 Sometimes a general officer would take hand in an endeavor to put a check to this merciless quixzing. remember there was related an incl dent of this character by General Hood and It's consequences. It was at Suffolk while Characteristic was be- ing fought in 1883, and where Long, streets corps had been drawn by demonstration. intended to aid Hook CTS efforts. In that region c navy would have been more appropriate. for 1t was water and gunboats they met. Bill Calhoun had been at his pranhs. General Hood standing near. called out to the colonel of Biifs regiment Detail an officer and twenty-five or your best men. Colonel. and order them to report to me at once. have set my heart on one of those gun boats down the river. and I know that my men of the Fourth will easily get it for me" Hill heard it all. Stepping up to General Hood and laying his hand familiarity on the generals horses neck. saiuted the rider and re- torted: Now general. look -a9here. if you've just got to have a gunhoat. whether or no, talk out like a little man and the Fourth Texas will buy you one. but them down Tn the river is loaded and the dumned Texans can't swim and to wade in would be leetis 100 prevously premature.
 But Bilf was the lease" of the com. niand. as I have remarked and no one was safe when he was near. He was as bad or worse but not as cultured in his observations. as Burgess would say, as Ned Phelps of the Louisiana troops. Ned was from Shreveport. La.. and steamboat man when. as Dansby remarked of the wars beginning. "the furry came" Coming up the Penin. sula on that historical retreat of 1s83 Phelps Invaded a dinner that had been prepared for General Magrudsr and was helping himself copiously. and with both hands, when the gen eral. with his usual stutter. snorted | out. "po you know who you are din- Ing with, sir?" Phelps, in no way dis concerted and not ceasing to ''tead" himseif. replied, or rather mumbled through mouths full, Not on your fife do I but I'm not So particular now since l joined the army. and provided always the fellow don't blow his own norm, and the victuals are clean don't care d----d who I eat with"
 The only general who came near get ting away with the wits of the army was Generaly Early, and he did 1t to the bands when in the Valley in the winter Of 1884. when the soldiers who carried guns were not permitted leave, he returned their applications for fur ioushs with this terse endorsement: "Disapproved. Shooters before toters.
 Early's army nickname was "Old lube" and before the war he was a staunch Untonist-as violent as he was later an "unsubdued rebel" Breckin- ridge' who commanded 6 division in mat unfortunate Valley campaign In oS. aSS4 was the exponent in his former political life, of the extreme secession dogmas, and was to Early in those days thing to be despised." Burgess told the story that after the Cedar Creek rout, Early came upon Breckin- ridge miles away, dejected and forlorn Early gazed on him as their weary horses logged along. and with no pleas Ing expression. and then in that squeak voice he possessed, snarIed out: Well, Breckinridge, what do YOU think of slavery in the territories now?"
 The men had a by-name for all the officers civilian or soldiers. and those expressed either likes or dislikes, af- lection or contempt, love or indiffer- ence. The highest was "Marse Bob" and woe. to the man who took his name in vain. Of him they passed no jokes or gfbes-be was the father of us all and for him there was an ip- describable veneration, which like Nc. Cullum More's heart will be as cold as death can make 1t when warmed not by the sight of the Tartan.
 But with all his fun the soldier had his moments of pain, of danger and of pathos. and with Joe Poliy'a pathos, and of the letter written to Major c. F. Smith. of the sixty-frst Pennsylvania. by his sister, which let ter fell to "Polly's loot at Seven Pinea I'll close this story
 The letter was written from West Chester county. It was so charming and so home like so devoid of bitter ness to us "rebeis" that 1t made Joe homsesick. He read 1t many times and fearing 1t might fall into unapprecia- tive hands. he burned 1t. As Joe said: : "It would please the gallant major no doubt. if he survived the discomlture and patriotic sister. to be assured of my gratitude for the pleasure afford ed me, the major, by a nasty retreat. and the lady by writing a letter so in- teresting. newsy and humorous as to charm a stranger and rebel and to remind him of his loved ones In far of Texas"
 While perusing 1t the rebel sat on a chunk of wood at the foot of a pine tree with his feet in the water. A heavy shower had just fallen and dry places were not easy to find. Tvery now and then a cannon ball or shell fired from a Federal gun, would crash through the top of the tree; but he was inside the range, and any damage done by them was to people far back in the rear.
 How has time dealt with the gal lant Pennsylvania major and his charming sister?