Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1909-12-17
GRLDIRON SLAMS"
FOR PRESIDENT.
TAFT AND AIDS ARE TARGETS OF
POINTED JESTS AT FAMOUS
CLUBS DINNER.
ROOSEVELT NOT FORGOTTEN!
Several Noted Men Among Diners Are!
Called Upon to Express Views
on Suffrage
LEARN TRUTH ABOUT NORTH POLE

WASHINGTON, D. c., Dec. 13.-
President Taft and members Of his cab
met, senator's, judges, scientists, diplo-
matists and men of high station in pub
lie and private life spent several hours
Saturday night as the guests of the
Grldlron club in reVelry, song and non
sense, blended with wisdom. They heard
many homely truths told in odd form and
enjoyed many jokes at their own ex-
pense because of the genial humor III
which the shafts of wit were hidden.
Men strongly opposed in politics and
others who, although of the same politi-
cal party, had found serious reasons for
wide divergences, were at the dinner anu
listened with real glee to the ludicrona
exploitation of their Quarrels.
The distinguished company learned In
an authoritative way the truth about
the discovery Of the north pole through a
scientific commission. which reported per-
sonally to the Gridiron club and under
took to arbitrate the differences between
Peary and Cook, represented by the two
initiates into the organization
Like March at Pole.
One of the explorers said he had ident-
fed the pole by the resemblance of the
climatic conditions to Inauguration day
at Washington. He had qualified for
his task by climbing Capitol hill to reach
equipped with fountain pen and mega
phone. The pole was found to be as
far distant from land as President Taft
found the insurgent wigwam from the
stand-pat igloo.
Strange discoveries were made at the
earth's top. Santa Claus was found
laden with heavy packages marked, My
policies-from II. X. to w. III. r." The
aurora borealis resembled the halo that
Taft put on Aldrich. while Cannon's
halo resembled the midnight sun with
out the SUM.
Matt Henson appeared, claiming to
have located the pole in Savannah, and
produced it In the shape of BARRIERS
pole. tunefully telling of his exploits.
The question of identity being raised,
BARRIERS ruthlessly removed the enor-
nous hirsute appendages of the pseud"
explorers and disclosed the initiates,
The following menu was served at the
dinner:
Canape Saxon.
Seaconnet Oysters
Celery. Radishes. Olives. Sailed Nuts.
Clear Green Turtle.
Filet of Potomac Bass, Tartare-
Cucumbers.
Tournedos Of Beef, BourgeoiSe.
Terrapin Maryland
Gridfron Punch.
Quail en- Casserole.
Salad la Taft.
Plombiere Russo.
Assorted Cakes. I'd
Cigars. Cigarettes. Coffee.
Martini Cocktails. Sauterne.
Meet & Chandon Imperial Crown Brut.
Apoltnaris.
Raid by Sufragettes.
Scarcely had the guests turned again
to their entree when the dinner was in
terrupted by the noisy entry Of dozen
hardfaced old danes. leading meek and
hen-pecked husbands. These turned out
to be delegation of aggressive suffra.
gettes. demanding "Votes for Women"
in strident voices. Several noted men
among the diners were called upon to de-
clare their positions on this momentous
question, to the great amusement Of the
company. Finally the president of the
club decided against the women's claims,
whereupon they announced their pur-
pose to participate i'll the dinner and
were only driven away through threat
to feed them after the British fashion,
through the medium of a gigantic stom-
ach pump.