davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

A Thought struck Mrs. Midssn When
She Returned Home.

A Thought Struck Mrs. midgeu When
She Returned Home.
"ohi" exclaimed Mrs. Midgen. She
had been shopping and visiting. and
had just arrived home when a thought
struck her. She clasped her hands
together in dismay. and in her agita-
ton sat Rat down on the cat. What
ever shall ] do?"
Il expect yoa will get over II" said
Mr. Midgen. testify. He was waiting
for his tea What Is itg"
Il took my diary out with me in
stead Of that little price-book, and II
I haven't been and left It somewberei
Suppose somebody should get hold OF
II and read it?-
''Ha, hal" laughed her husband.
THAT Will be fine sport How I
should like to see them reading all
the rubbish you have written in it,
What's the good of going backl Youl
never get it,"
"Oh. remember ncwi" suddenly
cried Mrs Midgen. 1T Is my old one.
So It doesn't matter at all. feel
quite relieved"
what was in it," said he. feeling
disappointed.
q used to amnse myself by copying
your love letters in It, and Initiated
your signature at the bottom Of them" p"
What" yelled Midgen, jumping to
his feet and grabbing at his hair. "Do
you want people to know what an idiot
! was, and make me the laughlngstock
of the parish just when I'm putting up
for the vestry? Go and look for 1t,
quick And offer $40 reward for it,"
And If It hadn't been found in Mrs
Midgen's bag at that very moment
there is no telling what would have
happened to that household.-The
Sketch.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

The maximum length Of life Of some
Of the best known animals is as fol-
lows: The horse lives to maximum
Of thirty-fve years, and the donkey
4 Ike period; the dog does not ex-
ceed twenty-five years; the rabbit
from eight to ten; the goose. thirty;
the duck. the hen and the turkey. a
dozen years.
Among the animals having the best
established reputation for longevity
are: The crow, which lives one hun
dred years; the parrot and the ele-
phant, which attain an age Of one
hundred and fifty years. Carp. on the
other hand. appear to have usurped
their reputation, which was based on
ill-understood facts from Chantilly
and Fontainebleau. They rarely be
come centenatians. The tortoise up
pears to be the animal that lives the
longest, and the record of longevity
Is surely held by one weighing $50
kilograms, which was presented in
1904 to the London geological gar
dens by Walter De Rothschild. md
which is said to have been born in
1850.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
sNIAkINa suspIcIoN cLINenap.
Tale Of q Porsly Psrsonass with wooI-
" Side WhIaksrs.

" Side Walakera.
"Uh-whilst 20 was gone,r said
Brother Smathers. 'elating the news
to Brother Buckaloo. who had been
on a journey. "a gentleman peared on
de scene yuh. wild de noration dat he
was clarryvoyant and de seventh
son O suppin'-I dunnah What-and
was gwine to hold a secession IN de
lodge hall and show signs and Won
dUhs for de + Oldest sum o. two bits
for folks and ten cents for bstwixt
sized child'en: po'tiy pussonage. wid
q striped vest and woolly side-whiak-
ers. and bout de shade, he was, Of de
opposite Of a fish"
"wisht I'd a ben dar." enviously
remarked Brother Buckaioo.
"Wisht yo' had, tsah; uh-kaze likes
sympathy We1l-uh. de sldeWhiskered
gentleman took de money at de do,
md de house was plumb packed; and
len he blowed out de light. and
nounced in a grizzly voice for every
body to set right till. uh-kaze for de
iust spearmint he was uh-gwine TO
whirl in and separate their souls FUN
Heir bodies"
.'Mum-mum-muh Lawd. sahl Did he
10 it?"
Not SOS you could notice IT. We
dess sot and sOt. and waited and wait
I'd. and bime-bye a gamblin' man. dat
wasn't skeered. begun 10 snawt; and
zen he 1T a light. and behold de pub
essah was gonel He'd done separat
d us smaht growed folks sum our two
,its apiece and de innycent child'en
nm deir dimes. and was gone fun us
)at's all dar was to It. 'ceppin' II
Inches de sneakin' s'picion rs had
or 10 desc many days. dat a niggel
Vic side-whiskers dess naturally kaini
e right"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
De for EIaatIe conaeIenes.

Riggs and Briggs are two Montreal
citizens. more or less interested in
municipal sffairs. They differ on sew
eral burning questions. but unite in a
strong dislike for o'F1aherty (which
IL not the gentleman's name). The
same O'Flaherty has a positive gift
for manipulating votes, and is capable
Of looking after a larger band of the
faithful" than any other Montreal
politician.
Its men like 0'Flaherty who give
this city a bad name" said Riggs
warmly. ''He's got no principles at
all. In fact, he doesn't think Of any
thing but getting his man in
That's So" responded Briggs I'll
had a conscience as elastic as
o'F1aherty's. I'd make 1t into a rub
Der trust"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Down 70 BRAD rack.

1T is a wonderful story" says the
publisher to the new author. whose
manuscript has Just been accepted
but you have failed In one important
feature. You do not describe the way
the heroine was dressed when the
hero first met her. You'd better write
in a paragraph about her clothes. but
Try 10 avoid the conventional"
The ingenious author. knowing the
sameness Of costume descriptions in
the best sellers. and also knowing how
to make an appeal to the feminine
heart. wrote:
-Heloise floated toward him garbed
in a $500 dress. a $3.50 hat. With 9
ses.75 mantilia over q tS7e lace coat
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

Few american lawyers go scroao
without visiting the Old Hall at Lin
coins Inn. in ondon. There was a
gathering OF English legal Eghts in
the Hall q week OF two ago to listen
to an address on "ThesLaw Of Drunk
euuess" The writer is able to recall
the alcoholic propensities OF the IA
nous Judge Boyd. of the Irish Bench.
who so often sat in the Old Han. He
kept 8 supply of his favorite 'pizen''
on the desk before him in an ink
stand Of peculiar make. and when he
wanted a sip be took 1t through a
quill pen. while counsel prolessed en-
tire ignorance of the little manoeuvre.
Tell the Court truly" he once said
to witness. were you drunk or sob
err" "Quite sober. Ny Lord" REPLIED
the man, and his counsel added. with a
look at the inkpot. as sober as a
Judge"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
oouNraY slLLIARps.
Story that VIII BE Appreciated BY
Knlnhts Of the Cue.

Knights Of the Cue.
Calvin Demarest. the amateur bill
Hard champion, described at a dinner
in Chicago some poor billiard tables.
"One summer IN the country" be
said, another man and were over
taken BY storm and had 10 go into
a tavern for shelter. The rain fell
steadily. We had three or four long
hours before Us. Time began 90
hang heavily on our hands
Landlord said I. do you happen
to have a billiard tablef
Sure. said the landlord. Sure.
Just step this way, gents
"He proudly threw open the door
Of a dark. stufy room. We saw an
nntiquated table with patched cloth,
and in the corner was a rack of crook
ed cues.
ANY ballsf said l.
Sure said the landlord. and he
unlocked a closet and laid on the ta-
bic three white balls. all alike-there
was no spot. you know.
But, see here, demonstrated
how do you tell these balls apart7'
"sOh. that's all right, said he. You
soon get to know 'em By theif
shape -Washington Star.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
sandx,s peIIeate HInt.

Sandy and his lass had been sitting
ogether about half an hour in silence
Maggie" he said. at length. ~wasna
here on the Sawbath nicht?"
Aye. Sandy. daur say you were .
AN wasna here on Monday
licht?"
AYE. so ye we're"
An l was fere on Tuesday nicht
Wednesday nicht, an Thursday
.ioht. an Friday nichtf"
Aye. I'm thinkin' that's So.
AN this is Saturday nicht. an I'm
ere again?"
~Weel. what for. no? I'm sure ye'rs
cry welcome"
Sandy desperately y)-Maggle, WON
n. De no begin to smell rat2
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

indian Missionaries to the semInoles.
The Indian Baptist Church OF We
woka. whose members belong to the
Seminole tribe of Indians and whose
services are held in the Seminole Ian
guage. is preparing to send mission.
aries to Florida to convert more th IN
Ave hundred members Of the Seminole
title still living IN that State. An ef-
fort viii be made to raise $4,000 for
this work. and to send about ten per-
sons to Florida. The missionaries
will be led by the Rev. jackson Brown.
a brother Of Governor John Brown Of
the Seminole nation. Mr.. Brown Wis
tied the Florida Seminoles about two
years ago. and at that time got the
idea OF converting them to Christian
tfR
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Ilarriea Women and susIness.

Mr.. Amy L. Heuple. young ma
- Of Chicago. has struck a true
IN discussion on the problem OF
ness following the woman in
sess or married and her own
:. keeper. "For ray part. without
irsn. l should prefer the business
d." she writes; but l have made
q choice and am not sorry for it. !
wclk a good deal harder than when
~ hours were from 9 to 5. with a
short day Saturday and Sunday free.
b., there are compsnsations that the
C. iless housewife lacks. regret
b. . little time to improve my mind;
= At ume take for reading often
bszrudGe. Things viii be better by
sr I by. and meanwhile let me find
r.. ssurs in my babies. Here and now
- rave them. and nothing else in al
1 world is SO important" Mrs. H0p-
also says she has discovered o.
=, dif1cult OF all things for WON
and that is to buy a hat with a
Al all baby in her arms.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Took Her at Her Word.

A woman came into the general
store with a Jar Of butter. She de-
sired to exchange It for another Jar
OF butter. In churning her butter she
had discovered mouse in the chnrn.
1T didn't iniure the butter" she
said to the storekeeper. 'and to any
one Who did not know the circum-
stance It would taste all right"
Taking the woman at her word. the
merchant carried her jar into the
back room. transferred her butter to
another jar. and the gratified custom
er took back her mouse butter with a
thousand thanks for the accommoda-
tiou.
There is 8 great deal of needless
trouble in the world on account OF
sqneamish sentiment
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

One Of the most sensible fashions
for the housewife is the revival Of the
one-piece dress 70 be worn about the
work of the home. The skirts of these
d uses are comfortably narrow, trim
siort, and without superfuous trim
ng TO rumple and soil. or to catch
on things" when going about the
work They close down the front
from the shoulder to the bottom Of
the skirt. fastened with buttons. They
are easy TO put on and on, easy to
ikundsr. and not difncult to make.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
KIna Of a cocoanut Isle.

Unheralded. a monarch arrived in
the city recently when King William
Of Teuroa disembarked from the
steamship MariDOss. The king. who
prefers TO be known BY the plain
American title of W. J. Williams. is
the sole owner Of the island Of reu-
roa, OF the Society group. In the South
Seas Although without army o.
navy. unless his own arsenal and
canoes may be eonsiderd such. Viii
lams Is more absolute than any reign
ing European ruler as he Is the sole
owner OF the island, which Is covered
with a valuable cocoanut grove Will
lams says that within ten years his
principally will be supporting over
10000 bearing coeoanut Feea-san
Francisco. Cal. Dispatch 70 Seattle
FqstIpsslligsassh
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
A Nuelsus.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle once told
Al amusing story Of an illiterate mil.
honAirs who gave a wholesale dealer
an order for q copy of every book in
all languages treating OF any aspect
OF Hapoleon's career. He thought 1t
would fll 9 case In his library.
He was somewhat taken aback, how
ever. when in q few weeks he receiv-
ed message from the dealer that he
hnd got 5000 volumes. and was await
Ing Instructions as to whether be
shcald send them on as an Install
mert or wait for a complete set.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
When the srIde-Elset Objected.


young man. who looked every
ach the bridegroom. stood in the 70
urda OF a Chicago hotel the other
Jay telling a friend OF the manner Of
IFS proposal to his bride. She had
nown Of his wild ways and fondly
ioped to reform him through mar
-iage. After had popped the ques
ion and she had accepted me-" he
said. Il at once began 20 talk about
rhe wedding. We shall go away
somewhere by ourselves. my dear ]
said; there will be no flourish. no
cards. no ceremony'-here she inter
rurted me. and. with dsgnitied sweep
Of her arm. declared: Mr.. -, }
shall certainly insist upon a eere
mony.'"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

ls the American too lazy to shave
himself. Or does the barber go into his
business. trade OF no trade. because
4 Is f2syf A list Of selected mailins
aidfSsses. by classes. shows 1851
baFber shops. as against II 600 bakers
80 900 ereamerles. 10000 milk dealers.
snd 24.oOs druggists. The roll has
e.75I BARRIERS in New England. II.
t2i IN the Middle Atlantic States. IS.
ses IN the Central. t.eos IN the Vest
srS ana A7as ia tAs southern s'alSG,
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
poaa7Opo4ouo.Op0poa

Physicians have long been looking
for harmless headache cure. It
has been produced. by an eminent
chemist of the National Capital. 1t
is kno-vn as BRoMo-PEPsIN. Besides
curing every form of headache
instantly, Bromo Pepsin is equally
and as promptly efficaoious in
chronic and acute indigestion and
the nervous disorders incident there
o. 1t is efferescent and pleasant
to take and may be had of ali mp &c
date druggists at ten cents a bottle.
It comes as a boon to mankind anG
womankind. For sale at G. o.
Armstrong, Druggist.
0AOAOA0AOAoAeASA0aoAS4sASa
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

e deelare." says the housewife. =
eoa't knea what We are TO do when
r6und Steak costs as much as porter
house n = outrageous"
N-Yos. mrm," agrees the marketman
-Wh4t's a body going to do il this
kesDs sdhse
-IsFould advise you. mum, that be
y ls ce4s e eat porterhouse
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Fearsome Threat.

From the classroom occupied by the
toughest boys In the Sunday school
came a great uRroar. fha secretary
m the next room vent Ia 70 insssti
gate. complets silence followed the
opening Of the classroom door.
"Haye you got teaeherf-
"No''
DO you want one2"
mo"
Then be quiet or you'll set one
Result comparative peaee.-MaD-
chester Guardian.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

Physical defects can be turned into
incentives to success instead of draw
backs, what We look upon as handi-
caps in the end may prove spurs to
enable us to reach the goal OF desire,
II we know but how to use them. We
make our own happiness, we carve
our own Exchange.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Not pIsInterested.

A Massachusetts, professor says
Tough beef is as nourishlng as the
choicer cuts. Sounds ike the utter
ance OF a man who owns a dental par
lor or pepsin factory.-New York
Evening TELEGRAM.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
A. DISADVANTAGE.

ITS all right to talk to some men
about climbing the ladder OF success"
ss'd a Newarker who is trying 70 raise
a family OF seven on 81 a week. "but
when man is nat on the ground and
a. ladder is standing on top OF him
4 Ain't : afalr line Of preaching"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

~Alasl~ confessed the peniteni
man; lin a moment Of weakness ]
stole carload Of brass fittings"
IN a moment Of Wsahnsss?- ex
claimed the judge. Goodness, man
what would you have taken II yol
had Yielded y . Nensst Nhea yev
alt sEeREis ........
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

beg pardon. are you Morbie the
prize fghter?"
Young feller, I ap a pugilist no,
a prize fighter. Are you one Of then
oeporters?"
..No. sir; I'm a Journalist"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

Work Is the only means Of growth.
Not to work is to keep always an un-
developed hand. or heart, or brain.
The things which work may achieve
are not half so important as that
which work does 10 Us Turner,
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
STAYS ON THE LINE.

Clothes Prop Which Cannot Be
Throw Down by the Wind.
An Improvement has been recently
made in the construction OF clothes
props which all women who take an
active part IN the household routins
will appreciate. Il would seem that
the old style prop and done service SO
long that they could be no improve
ment suggested. but a well known
shortcoming OF the old wooden pole is
that In a wind it is soon dislodged
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Beetle Hunting In Queensland

Eccue running IN 0ucensidnd'
A reward OF Is. I'd. a pound was re-
Gently offered by the Queensland
sugar planters, writes a Brisbane
tAustralial correspondent. for beetles
OF the destructive sugar cane grub.
Hundreds OF men and boys have now
taken up beetle hnnting as a profss-
sion. One man earns &c a week
throughout the beetle season" and
the boys make from s2 a week up.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

illiRms Young Astorbllt Isn't al
Al tell4lse, Is hef
Wtite Why. don't know.
WillianA- -oh. be isn't Why, this
motnins J saW him riding in his auto
HStile With policeman.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

~He puts his watch under hIu. phi
low every night"
Il notice he hka = sleep oyei
time"
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

Bleach Ivory In the Sun.
After cleaning ivory expose II to
the sun. This assists in bleaching It..
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
William B. KenwOrthey N. o
Physician and SureOn
Oihce and residence Broad Street
lext Court House. MILFORD.
For Rent

Furnished rooms to rent Enquire
of Mrs Eta Poillon, Corner Broad
and Ann Streets. Milford, Pa.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
NOTICE.

The Commissioners Of Pike County
will hereafter hold Regular Meetings
the first Monday of each mo. between
thehours of9 a. m and p. IN. except
ing in the months when Court may
be in session, and then during Court
THEO. II. BAKER
Comm.ssi 'ners Clerk
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10

II you are an Engltshman. don't
think that Juggling is 'armless; II is
'armfuL western Arademian.l
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
WARTS sUPPLlEDII

Ifyon want note heads. bin heads, lette
heads, statements. show cards, progra ns
large posters, sale bills, dodgers envelopes
tags business cards or job printing
every description, done M in the best styl
foi sou in an nP-to-date md artistic mus
nsr oalland see us. Prcasf
THE PRESS PRINT.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Of Interest
to Women

Tha wslsn Of the cireus-She
Lsads Careful Lie and Is Very
Fsniuine In Her Tsste-A MziOriiy
81 Her Saved Money Is Put IntO
Handsons Home. Her Ambition.
Pike County press. (Milford, Pa.) 1895-1925, 1909-12-10
Time Table
ERIE RAtLROAD.I
PORT JERVIS

Solid Pullman trains to Buffalo Mag
are Falls. chautauqua Lake, Cleveland
Chicago and Cincinnati.
Tickets on sale at Port Je alt
points in the West and Southwest at lower
rates than via any other hrst-class line.
In effect June 2lth, 1908.
Norwich bulletin., 1909-07-02
INCOME TAX AMENDMENT.
GENERAL FURRY IN SENATE
Fixing of Day to Vote Prevented by
Senator Buikeley.

Washington, July 1.-The senate
came within one today of agreeing
to vote next Tuesday on the entire in
come tax amendment to the tariff bill,
including the corporation tax substi-
tute. The all but concluded compact
Senator Bukeley of Connecticut, and
his opposition aroused no little feel
ing.
The proposition took the form of a
request from Senator Flint, who. ow-
ing to the absence of Senator Aldrich
is now ip charge of the tariff bill, for
unanimous consent to vote on the Bal
eyCummins income tax amendment
and all of the amendments TO the
amendment at II o'clock next Tues
day, with an understanding that the
senate should remain in session until
all these questions were disposed of.
The suggestion created a general fur
ry in the senate There was the usual
animated gathering in the center aisle.
A number of senators asked to be
heard and the proceeding for a brief
time took on the appearance of a gen.
eral conversation at a sewing bee.
One senator after another expressed
his consent to the proposition until for
few moments it looked as if all OBJ
jections would be brushed away and
all factions satisfied. Just as the vice
PICSldtuI was SlallHS lne agreement
for about the third time, Mr.. Bulke-
ley loomed up and proceeded to say
that he could not agree that the vote
should be taken at the time specified.
He did not then give his reason and
he. was Immediately beset by dozen
or more senators in the hope of pre-
vailing upon him to desist from his
opposition. 1t turned out that while
he was opposed to the corporation tax
amendment this was not his real rea-
son, but that he expected to be alb
sent from the city next Tuesday and
did not want the vote recorded while
he was away. 1t seems that some of
Mr.. Buikeley's constituents are very
strongly opposed to the corporation
provision, and, sharing in their feel
ing, he desires TO make as strong a
fight as possible against it. He there
fore desires 10 be on hand up to the
last moment and in view of the fact
that he expects to be in Connecticut
with the president next Tuesday he
found it quite impossible to give his
attention to the amendment on that
day. He did not, therefore, change his
mind, but when the senate adjourned
many of the Connecticut senator's COL
leagues were hopeful that he might be
found more yielding tomorrow.
The senate adjourned at 43O.
Norwich bulletin., 1909-07-02
oRvILLE WRIGHT MAKES
THREE SUCCESSFUL FLIGHTS.
EneireIed Fort Myer Drill Ground
Time After Time.

Washington. July 1.-Orville Wright.
late today. encircled the Fort Myer
drill grounds time after time in his
aeroplane in three successful lights
which q crowd OF thousands cheered
him for the success that attended his
persistency and pluck.
After the apparently unsuccessful
attempts OF the past two days the per-
formances OF the flying machine were
inspiring.
How are YOU satisfied with today's
showing" Mr.. Wright was asked by q
bystander.
-If We could do any better ! would
say that I was very well satisfied" was
his confident reply. We did not make
any changes in the motor for today's
trial." ke continued. we only ad-
vanced the spark. somewhat. We are
not using the (ull power that our
motor is caps bl$of developing"
Mr. Wright would not estimate the
speed at which the aeroplane Travelled.
but Il probably was from 80 10 3S
miles an hour.
Young Charlie Taft. who has been
almost q daily visitor. violated nearly
all the rules set down bv the Wrights
for the restriction OF photographers.
He was greatly excited over the aero
planes performances and kept close
tab on the time OF each flight.