The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-02-21
DRIFT WOOD

1 Senator Tillman Is opposed to the California Legislature sitting. while the Is set forth as the plea, - New Mexico and Arizona are feeling real chesty as they look over the latest styles in Statehood spring suits. The InterStates Commerce Commits sion has been increased from seven to orable Commission have work enough to keep half that many busy remains to be seen. but perhaps they need the money. The Omnibus bill is dead for the ses- sion. This bill represents 100000 in claims for the Southern people. Rep could do no more. May it prove as un- : conquerable. however. as Banauo's ghost.
 Birds in the stores are not cheap. but thank goodness. with the advent of spring they will soon begin to cheep.
 We observed a couple of brightly uni formed guards with big. glittering stars on their coats. escorting a pair of convicts in striped suits along the street sss ysstsrdsyi MS Sss n saw the stars" and stripes" go byi
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 Before marriage a girl writes and to marry a prince. After the knot is tied, however, she doesh't ti.wrtte and tell them that the prince" is getting free board at her monlmer's, butehe Is --Qusss tfsqNentiy slsssor-5. a.
 Some partings are very sad, but when a. fool and bis money are parteo' nobody seems to care: .+ There ,is such g thing as a woman practicfng consistent preyarioation un- til she really believes it herself.
 The Duke di Buzzard will now climb. He seems determined to risk some-' thing as dangerous as matrimony.
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 A woman had rather eat mush out of a cut-glass bowl than to cal roast turkey of of greasy pine board t9- Is ' not so esthetic when 1t comes to the epicurean side of his nature.
 Speaking of Roosevelt's African hunt, seems to us he has been on an "African hunt" ever since he has been in office, judging by the way he has given out African appointments
 A Pennsylvania priest declares that cense. It all depends on the girl. A 4 sweet MOsntgSmsTy n sSS SaS naiden sweuld be.t
 = Ss 'Ss@sA"'. e Can't somebody prove that sMr Taft 2 was born in four or i've log cabins? W
 After March {. Mir. Fairbanks will be a statesman out of a job, unless Mir. Tatf decides to appoint him as the of- fcial fiag-pole. of the administration,
 Can't Colonel watterson save Louis vile from a dry landslide? Without her horse races and mint juleps, what will Kentucky beg
 Marcel Provost says that alcohol and corsets are the causes of physical and moral degeneracy In America. Alcohol well. it makes our face red to say 1t.
 i.
 There is talk of naming one of the new battleships Theodore Roosevelt. That is the proper name for lighting vessel, all right all right
 Don't forget that tomorrow is George washington's birthday. If in vited out to a Washington party don't fail to tell a joke about the cherry tree. It doesn't matter if everyone has little hatchet handy to be hurled at you -A
 are % no more dangeFous than automo: to: piles. And certainly not so objection able When floating high above one'R head one can't smell the ding-busted things. 14- May the good Lord and his angels. be with every little Montgomery blonde as she wends her way graceful iy to church this morning. and keep Birmingham Holsters from snatchlng them away from the fold.
 Aliens.
 Two aliens stand beside the sea- By the wind-swepk sea--by the sobbIng
 sea I. And each one gazes lohgingly
 Where the sun sinks in the foam. One from Italy's fair shore
 The other doomed a tramp to roam. One knows he'll see his home no
 The other--weli, he has no home!
 --Phll H. Armstrong.