The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-02-25
THE EVENING STORY
Natural Gas and Miranda.
(By Mary Aldine.)

| (By Mary AlQ1ne.)
Mr.. Samuel Perkins, assisted by
two Italians, all with their coats and
vests off and perspiring profusely,
| was boring an artesian well on his
farm.
! Suddenly the drill was forced out of
\ the ground. There followed a great
puff of vapor that had the odor of bad
| eggs and sulphur mixed together. Mr..
| Perkins had struck a natural gas
| well.
A month later Mrs. Perkins was
| Samuel, remember that we spell
| our name P-a-r-k-i-n-s. Also that a
| month hence we sail for Europe.
| We've got money and we've got
daughter Miranda. We are going to
| give her a chance"
"a chance for what?" asked the
husband, who was trying to get used
| to wearing a collar and a coat around
the house.
ITO get polished up and to marry
some one worthy of her You needn't
sit there thinking that a few weeks
ago Miranda was hanging out the
clothes. We've struck natural gas,
and that makes a difference. We sail
in four weeks"
81 did kinder think we might go
to Niagara Falls for week or So"
began Samuel, as he rubbed his chin.
with money? What are they to
Miranda? Samuel Parkii% can't you
realize that you struck gN?'
81 know 1 did"
eve are climbing for the top of the
| ladder. We can't be kept down.
Haven't you got it through your head
yet? It's Europe and polish. It's Eu-
rope and a husband for Miranda. If
them Chicago butchers can take their
daughters to Europe and marry them
| off to lords and dukes, why can't we?
isn't natural gas just as high
toned as pork chops? You keep
nd Oh h cd nd
get used to looking like somebody and
leave the rest to me-"
Mr.. Parkins would rather have sat
on the steps of the village and related
for the five hundreth time what his
emotions were when he struck gas,
but he was dragged off to Europe.
Miranda betrayed surprising lack
of interest, but Mrs. Parkins did the
thing with all her might. She had ma
tive wit and observation. BY sitting
in a corner most of the time and hav-
ing as little as possible to say, the
husband and father made out after a
fashion.
In due time he even became in
terested in things. He became so in
terested that one evening, after they
had been in London for a fortnight,
he asked his wife:
MARY, are we hitting the pike all
right?"
Hitting the pike!" she repeated in
scornful tones. Samuel, cut the pike
and other things out. Miranda and
me are watching ourselves every min
ute, and you want to do the same.
Don't you leave the spoon in the cup
when you drink your coffee, and don't
tuck your table napkin clear up I'M
der your ears. If you spoil
Miranda's chances I'll never forgive
you"
But what 1 want to know is has
any Teller come around YETI" persisted
the husband
mo, not exactly, but I've noticed
different ones looking at her and sorter
edging around. You leave that part
Of it to us, and you ten to yours.
Whenever you can, you just drop in a
word about natural gas and millions"
ooh, won't spoil nobody's chances.
didn't want to come at first, but now
that I've got over here rayther like
it. Makes a Teller feel as If he was
somebody to have a boy ready at ev-
cry turn to brush off his coat
Il guess I'd be proud to have a lord
or duke for son-in-law. That's
Miranda's lowest f1gger, hain't it? She
hain't coming over here and then take
up with no hayseed?"
1t was Paris after four weeks in |
and there was a continual i'm |
provement in the family. Miranda and |
French word a day, and the husband |
and father left his fears behind him |
and assumed a little swagger and a |
patronizing air that sat well on him.
simply by accident. He reasoned that !
he might strike a husband for Miriam
da abroad in the same way. Therefore, |
whenever he came across any one who |
could speak English, he introduced gas
wells into the conversation.
1t was always in the plural. 1t was
never one gas well, but half a dozen.
He also tried his best to make the head
waiter understand the gas question,
and if he did not succeed entirely he at
least ELECTED the exclamation:
"Gas from the ground. Mon Dieu!
And each well a million dollarsl How
you must suffer with so much money!"
Eyes, a heap of suffering, but I grit
my teeth and stand it,
When Mrs. Par5ins announced that |
they were to leave Paris for a resort
in the Alps, Mr.. ParkinS had his -op-
oortunity to ask:
'Any Teller in sight yet?"
Samuel, haint you got no polish in
-hese last two months?" demanded the
wife.
"Of course I have"
''Then show some of it. No gentle
nan would speak in that brutal man
Ter. I'm glad Miranda was not here"
"Well. has any lord or duke been
making. up to herr"
Making up! Making up Humph!
1r. Parkins, are you in Europe or
Texas? My daughter Miranda cannot
however, and in order that you may
lot use any more such expressions, let
ne say that I'm not worrying"
You mean---
ct mean that we are going to Switz-
rland to stop for a month or more at
he same hotel with a lord"
by George, but you don't mean it,"
reclaimed the husband. How in thun-
Ter did you bring it about?''
Samuel
Eyes, but that's a cute trick of yours.
You'll have him penned right up
Samuel Parkins!" cried the wife as
he flushed I'D.