The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-01-13
DRIFrWooD

D REDWOOD A girl needn't be afraid that the other girls will not notice her engagement ring sometimes half dozen of them recognize it as the one they have worn themselves.
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 The tariff has made Andrew Carnegie rich and now he has retired. He would also Ike for the tariff to be.
 Senator Tiliman wore Teddy to a 'fraz- gle" with his pitchfork.
 Messlna experiences on an average of about ten shocks an hour which is pretty nearly up to the number experienced by q newly married woman when she begins to is in the different phases of character he displays.
 When you see a man sneaking around an express office in Alabama these days, with that sheeplah look on his face, you can put 1t down to prohibition that's all.
 According to The Buffalo News a stone has been found in Syria that is 1s, 00O, GOO years old: We just can't help wondering how one looks at a stone and tells its age come pretty near it. but stone--never. An old maid by the name of Miss McDow- ell is touring the country lecturing on the
  1t these old maids can always tell us more about children than anyone else'
 Little dabs of powder, mighty grains of sand, and with il lovely woman, wins ali hearts In the land.
 slsf" ,-S. -N Atlanta boasts an eighteen pound ibAssum as the chief attraction of the Taft banquet th ssrsass beast s scSs sSfry for rrsis i iOs Ss he may be placed in, an embarrassing posi- tion. g.-. The speaker of the Tennessee House of Representatives is a football player. That's nessee ness House of Reps. judging by past episodes in the center rush line in that body.
 The elevator boy has his ups and downs. but he keeps right on and seldom ,frowns, and here is lesson we all may follow; cause you're sometimes down don't fuss and holler.
 These automobile love stories sound more like an automobile catalogue descrioinB sum dries than they do like real fiction When the President sends message Con- gress laughs When Congress replies the President takes horseback Tide:' oh pick les.
 Claus spreckels, the dead sugar king. came to this country at eighteen years Of age, with $3. Tn ms pocket 1Hluh Oh tutb every time you stir your coffee.
 Taft will break corn ypone in Atlanta on January 15, but as for breaking the solid south--well, that's another proposition. scorn not the humble egg-eggs go up and stay up and that's more than. even a 'lO'OOo air ship will do.
 Katherine Elxins is going to become q trained nurse. Katherine seems to have ale ready had practise in nursing fond hope. determined to be In fashion we had a lit- tie earthquake of our own in Washington State yesterday.
 It is against the law to mutilate. burn. or otherwise destroy money of the United States-according to the national law. .s %nen yoS Se.e nave wsrs According to the average woman, bridge construction can go to smash for all she cares so long as she has her bridge par ties.
 It is easier for rich man to enter the United States Senate than it is to enter the kingdom of heaven.
 A Toast Here's to lovely woman when she smiles.
 But the sweetest smile on earth.
 That all other simles Is worth. Is the smile of good Dame Fortune every
 time.
 Ole World Keeps a ROIIin'. Ole worP keeps rollin' froo de shadder an Froo de hour ob misery an froo de hour Froo de space of fife untwelI de Mahster
 say well done"
 Keep on a rollin' des a rollin'. Ole worl' hain't no time to stop no mattah Elf you'il be good you'se swineter be a angel Ole Worr say Law honey An ain't got no Ans sotter keep a roilin' des rOiln'." Froo de spring an summer frOO de wintah Ole worI des keep busy-ain't no time to
 stop tall ,ou.,-no.,,. vo. ,.n. s csin't M stop @ An mus des keep on
 rolin."
 The Cherokee Sentinel revives this story: ''At sunday School the teacher asked: Who drove the children of Israel into Canaan?" Not a child answered, and there ed the question. Then the teacher. with con siderable spirit. said: You little boy on the back seat, who drove the children of Israel into Canaan2' He was badly fright ened but managed to rise and sayi T didn't. we just moved here from Missouri last week."
 
 ''we press in grief thy now cold finger tips" is line in The Montgomery Adver- tisers goodbye to 1908. which shows just how hard 1t was for Alabama to part with Iiduor Buffalo Evening News.
 
 Private advices from Paul Cook and Drift Armstrong of Alabama are to the effect that while liberty is wounded in that State she is still able to sit up and commune with her friends. Houston Post.
 We haven't any medals from the W@AthSs Department taE f0reoastiag but