davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
MEANEsT KIND OF 4 Joke
Name Idea Of Humor Meant q F3W
Distracted Moments for
Mothers.

A mean. low-lived man living IN an
apartment house on East Eighty-sev-
enth street played cruel. o very
cruel, Pudd'nhead Wilson joke the
other day on two young women each
the proud possessor of a first-born
babe about a month old.
The two first-born prodigies we're
out on the porch of the apartment
house the other afternoon. The two
porches connect, the way they do on
many apartment houses, being separ-
ated only by small railing. The 10
ker came along and shifted the two
kids. Then the mothers took their
offspring out for an airing Each
youngster was all done up in mos
quito netting and stuff and neither
mother noticed the change until one
OF them stopped at the home of her
mother on another street. She ran
to the phone to notify the police, but
In her excitement called the fire de-
partment. 1t was just awful! AS
both babies were comparatively new,
she didn't even recognize the one she
had toted along as belonging to her
neighbor, and she couldn't think for
the life of her where she could have
mislaid her own child. o. 1t was ter.
rible while the excitement was at it's
height, but the two little dears have
been traded back now and all is we'll
once more.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
Natural Ventilation,

In cold weather the escape of air
from closed, warm rooms through the
porosity of walls and the leakage
around doors and windows is much
greater than is usually supposed. In
some experiments by Arthur d. Lit
tie of Boston, room of 615 cubic feet
was in the second story of an ordinary
clapboarded frame dwelling and the
interior walls and ceilings were plas-
tered and papered, the single window
made as tight as possibly by putty,
and the inner door was fitted with
weather strips. Even in this room,
natural causes made almost two COM
plete changes Of air an hour, as shown
by tests of the carbolic acid. 1t would
be interesting to know how the rate
changes with the differences between
outside and inside temperature, and
what difference gives an ordinary
tight" family living room safe ven.
tilation.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
THE CENTER OF THE EARTH
How the Zuni Indians Have Marked
the Supposed Spot by a
Crude Shrine.

In the Zuni cosmogony. the earth
Is conceived Of as fiat, and shaped
like a pancake. Being a chosen PEG.
pie Of the gods they we're commanded
early in their tribunal career to go to
the exact center of the world, and
there build their homes; and one Of
the most interesting legends of the
people relates the story of their wan.
derings in search of the middle place,
and tells how they knew 1t when they
reached it. 1t is about 200 yards south
of their village in western New Mex
leo, IS miles south of Gallup, on the
Santa Fe route. 1t is marked by q
crude shrine, built like a bake oven,
out of fiat stones. Two large remov-
able f1agstones close the entrance,
which faces the rising sun.
On the top are a number of concre-
tionary formations, known to the In.
dams as thunder stones. In the in
terror are large numbers of feather
tufted prayer sticks, and several earth.
enware vessels filled with sacred
meal Numerous ceremonial dances,
In the nature of rainmaking rites, are
performed around this holy place.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
THE sELF-DEPREcIAroRY MAN
Few Chances Come to One Who DIS
trusts Himself, Uncle Hiram
TeIIs Ills Nephew.

Henry" said Uncle Hiram to his
hopeful young nephew. II would not
advise anybody to go around tontin-
ually blowing his own horn. We tire
of men who do that, and we are apt
to think of them that that's all they
can do, blow. LII
"On the other hand, Henry, never
belittle yourself; never be self-depre-
ciatory. Don't have poor opinion
of yourself, but if you do have such
an opinion don't express it. The man
who blows his own horn may seldom
be taken at his own valuation, but the
self-depreciatory man almost invari-
ably is.
80 never run yourself down or
speak doubtfully of your own ability.
If the boss is thinking of advancing
you and he should say to you some
day: Henry, we are thinking of try
ing you on this thing. Do you think
you could handle this job? you don't
want to say: Well, l haven't had
much experience yet in that way, and
| really don't know whether l could do
that or not
You don't want to say anything
like that, for if you do they'll be like.
ly to think 1t over some more and
end up by trying somebody else, TAX.
ing blower, maybe, who can't really
do the work half as we'll as you could.
but who's got self-confidence enough
to say he can.
You don't know what you can do
til you try. Some men try and fail,
but an astonishing number rise to oc.
casions, develop strength or ability
that others might never have thought
them to possess"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
ON HIS WAY TO CINCINNATI
German. New to the Country, Made
Fun for Passengers, But II Was
No Joke to Him.

II shall not soon forget my difflcul-
ties with the English language" said
Heinrich. when I first arrived in
this country I was going to Cincin-
natl. I spoke not one word of Eng
fish, and they put me on a second
class train. 1t was summer and had
very heavy overcoat, steamer rug
and great big valises. I had no idea
how far 1t was to Cincinnati but judg-
ing by my own country, thought 1t
only an hour or two. began, when
we had been riding for an hour, to
think each station must be Cincin-
natl. I would arise. get all my be-
longings together, and say to the
conductor: Cincinnati" suppose
that he tried to tell me how far 1t
was. but, Of course, l did not under.
stand him. You can imagine how fun
ny that was to the other passengers,
for l got up at every station all day
and night and far into the second day,
with all my heavy bundles, o, so
warm. tired and perspiring, and called
out: 'Cincinnati? The other passen-
gers began guying me after few sta.
lions. knew neither the country nor
the customs, nor why they yelled at
me and why we did not reach Cincin.
natl"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09

They knew that she lived abroad
for couple of years, they said. Why
did she never speak Of It?
Il used to once in awhile" she an
swered, "but not any more after
met the two Brooklyn girls who had
travelled all over the world. They
cured me. 1t was When I was in
China or When was in Japan or
When went through the Black for
est or When took a sail down the
Red sea- until they just about bored
me to death. said to myself then
that l would ever after spare my
friends, and have kept my word"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
The Chocolate Eating Nations,

A Frenchman who has visited this
country recently expressed amaze.
ment at the great amount of chocolate
consumed by US. He had thought the
Parisians, of all people on the face
of the earth, excelled in the eating
of chocolate sweets, but here he found
the custom of coating things with
chocolate so prevalent that he said
the people of his city had something
in the line to learn from us. He did
not know perhaps that while we take
our chocolate lightly and for its own
sake quite as much as French people
do, we also approve Of it in our diet
for the nutritious qualities 1t DOS
sesses.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
Why He Knew.

The mild-mannered man was so well
Informed about past, present and fu.
ture dates of suffragists' meetings
that some one ventured the opinion
that his wife must be one of the chief
supporters of the cause.
You're away off there" said an.
other. THAT chap isn't even married.
He's hotel clerk, and has had to add
suffragist meetings to his church,
theater and political calendar for the
benefit of women travellers. Out-of
town women who want to be up with
the procession place those meetings
at the head of New York's attrac.
tons. They haven't time to look up
dates for themselves. so the accom-
modating clerks keep tabs for them"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
SWEETS FOR THE TEA TABLE
Wide Variety 10 at the Choice Of
Hostess for This Enjoyable
Function.

Firstly. have the very best Of tea.
tea OF a truly delicious favor. and
your particular veranda in summer
Tor your drawing-room in winter) will
prove the most attractive spot In
your particular suburb.
The serving of this beverage at its
best Is, to woman with the tea
habit, as is chocolate cake to man.
even although he may strenuously
deny all fondness for things sweet.
Good tea isn't great extravaganza,
because the richer flavors usually re.
quire scant allowance to the cup,
and small caddy of tea, II tightly
closed, will last long, long time.
The serving of some delicious
dainty with your tea may prove a
more satisfactory little treat than
sandwiches or crackers. Certain it is
that the ginger crystal kept in tin
will be ready to serve when the crack
ers you've carefully saved will need
reheating, and the sandwiches will
call you away from your guests or re.
quire previous preparation.
If the afternoon tea is not allowed
to drift into a troublesome function,
1t will more likely become an easy and
frequent thing that all will enjoy and
nobody will dread
A hostess sometimes lives a terrible
life, and more's the pity! for her
guests cannot be comfortable II 1t is
apparent that she is uneasy or over
worked.
There Is an assortment Of tea table
dainties. all requiring no care in the
keeping, and any of which may be
bought ready to serve. We have the
ever-reliable ginger in blocks. in the
natural root shapes; and then there is
stem ginger. Nut-stuffed dates and
figs are well known. Raisins, too, are
stuffed, sometimes with nuts and
again with bits Of fig. Large and
luscious prunes are filled with nuts
and also fig paste. Nut-filled cherries
are new dainty, and all Of the crys-
tallized fruits form fragrant and
luscious accompaniment to the cup Of
hot tea. A Japanese flagroot-no
doubt product of the wonderful iris
Of Japan-is crystalized, and ranks
with pineapple, orange and lemon.
Fruit glaces are almost as pass
able" as are those crystalized. Mar
rons are a great delicacy, while cum
quats (those absurdly small oranges)
are Of lesser value. Some people con-
slider them most unusual and interest
ing in taste. although they have been
characterized as only peculiar"
Rice candy is another sweet; while
olives and cheese straws appeal to
those who scorn the saccharine.
Have you ever cut English cheeses
into triangles? Or pressed them out
into fiat disks with small round cut
ter? These give a unique and pains
taking touch that means a bit more
trouble.
Remember that. in going into these
extravagances of the tea table, the
hostess is not expected to pass them
in quantity. Delicacies should, prop
erly speaking. be kept more or less
sacred. Afternoon tea is not a heavy
meal, and should never be allowed to
drift into anything other than an
excuse for conversation.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
A SAPPHIRE Gown,

Silk crepe or sapphire blue is the
foundation of a lovely evening dress.
Over this scarf of gold net hangs
in straight lines to the ground. The
train sweeps out from the lowen gold
edge. The bodice is of the same gold
net embroidered with gold and blue.
A glistening band of sapphire stones
edges the short, fiat sleeves and the
hem Of the net tunic. OF course, this
gown should have sapphire jewelry
to shine on the white neck and arms
Of its owner. It is a thing of beauty
and Joy as long as one piece of this
net on silk remains.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
The Day of Petty Tyranny.

Early methodist preachers had rea-
son to deplore the power of the all.
mighty landlord. Charles Wesley him.
self suffered. For he was summoned
and fined s10 ($50) and heavy costs
not for firing ricks or uprooting
hedges, but for walking across a field
to address an audience. Here is the
record: "Goter versus Wesley; dam.
ages, f10; costs taxed, go 16s Sd.
July 29th, 1879. Received of Mr.. Yves.
ley, 10 pounds. 16 shillings and eight
pence for damages and costs in their
cause.-William CASTOR, attorney for
the plaintiff"
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
Russell Saqe's Great Luck.

When Norcross blew himself up In
Russell Sage's office, Jay Gould
jumped into carriage with a gentle.
man. who told this to the New York
Press. and rushed to Mr.. Sage's resi-.
dence to congratulate him on his
lucky escape from death. Uncle Rus.
sell met the carriage at the curb and.
a. MT. Gould shook his hand and
spoke of his good fortune, Mr.. Sage
coolly remarked: Yes, I was pretty
lucky; had on these old clothes IN.
stead Of my new suit" The clothes
were sight to be imagined.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
Beading Help.

To use in beading in underwear.
Crochet the necessary
length in chain stitch of crochet cot
ton, run through beading, make small
little tassels of cotton. or sew ready.
made ones on ends Of chain. This
washes perfectly. wears indefinitely.
cannot pull out. and looks heater than
RIBBON after II has been washed.
The Hattiesburg news. (Hattiesburg, Miss.) 1908-1917, 1909-12-09
An Indiscreet Memory.

The Hostess-Don't you think,
Col. Broadside Is quite a wonderful
old man? Look at him. He Is u
straight and slender rs an arrow,
and he has the most wonderful mem
Org.
The Lady Of Dubious Age-I think
he's an atrocious old bore. He re-.
members when everybody was born.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
Secretary Rallinaer.

Cedar Falls Record: The Outlook
which was most sever in criticislns
Secretary of the Interior Ballinger
does the proper thing by rendering
that gentleman an apology after
careful examination Of the RECORDS
touching the matters in controversy
r. declares that the conduct OF Mr.
Ballinger after leaving the position u
commissioner of the general land OF
fec and before he became secretary
of the interior was wholly legitimate
and honorable and the charges tha'
publication brought against him are
withdrawn. Attorney General WICK
ersham investigated the entire NAV
ter after the charge appeared in Cor
lier's and he declares that there y
nothing dishonorable or even censuf'
able in the conduct of the secretary.
President Taft some days ago deciai.
ed his confidence in the integrity "
his secretary. All Of this evidence
ought to convince muckrakers Una.
their artillery should be turned IN LUZ
direction of some one else nv
American people have gone MAD =
an effort to discredit everybody noiu5
Ing responsible positions.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
AS to Early Mailing.

Cedar Rapids Gazette: A postal de-
partment employee says he believes 1T
will be practically impossible to get
people to transmit Christmas pack
ages early. There is little or no dis
position to send Christmas mail so
that it will arrive at It's destination
prior to the day before Christmas.
But the reform ought to be urged any
way. Packages can be sent at least
a week ahead OF time, and If labeled
Not to be opened until Christmas
eye,' they would in effect not arrive
until the Christmas season. The ex-
pertinent has been tried. and it has
worked. Families in Cedar Rapids
have received packages three or four
days before Christmas and have
obeyed the written injunction. Other
people could be educated to the same
thing. When one considers the bur,
den imposed on postal employees at
the Christmas rush, there is naturally
looking for some method o. tighten
ing that burden.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
PER CAPITA COST LOWER.

According to figures compiled in
the city auditors Office IN Des Moines
and given publicity in the Register
ard Leader, the per capita cost of
running that municipalities business
was 1882 less during the first year
under the Des Moines plan than it
was under the last year under the old
Ialdermanic system
The statement shows that for the
fiscal year which closed April i, 1909
/ the first twelve months under the
Des Moines plan, the expenditures
were $685., 54661. Based on popula-
ticn of 100000 the per capita. tax was
1886. but it is pointed out that SITE
6t6-0T of the expenditure was on
debts contracted by former councils
50. with that deducted, the actual pei
capita cost was $3.50.
/ On the other hand. it is shown
that the per capita cost of 1856 fol
tie last year under the old plan is
too low, for the debt of $4,000,
which the council accumulated ii
that time was not considered as spent
Then it was estimated the city Tad {
population of only 10000, SO that in
screases the per capita rate sl.37 ant
makes it s10.32.
These figures show that the pc
capita cost during the last year o
the old plan was s1O.22, as agains
$3.50 under the new The saving I'm
de-. the commission arrang ement, i
is thus seen, has been a material on
and quite worth while
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
The Homesteader,s Dilemma.

Was there ever girl with her head
in whirl
AS mine has been whirling tonight?
The wind bowls outside, and there's
no friend to guide
And to show the way that is right;
must find it all out, cen though
doubt succeeds doubt,
While the stars in the heavens grow
dim,
For I'm asking myself, is it lover or
pelf-
The hundred and sixty, Or jim?
I worked in the town and I gave Love
the frown,
Till at last was settled out here
With shack of my own, and a claim
plowed and sown,
Which makes up for one lonely
year:
But there's four more to wait, and now
hobs up old Fate
With the one he (or should it be
him?)
So which shall it be-one must go
don't you seer
The hundred and sixty or jim?
Arthur Chapman in the Denver Re
publican.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
BANK ADVERTISING.

Henry Dimse, vice president of the
Century Bank of New York city, fur
nishes the New York Commercial the
following practical illustrationa COM
pilation of statistics of banks in a
large city, advertising and those not
advertising which shows what good
has been done by advertising:
Assets advertising banks gained p
per cent.
Ditto non-advertising banks lost s
per cent.
Surplus advertising banks gained Il
per cent.
Ditto non-advertisine banks gained
10 per cent.
Deposits advertising banks gained q
per cent.
Ditto non-advertising banks sainee
! Z per cent.
Comment is unnecessary.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
APPLIES VERSUS ALCOHOL.

1t has been claimed that apples are
antagonistic to liquor and that the
use of them will abate the appetite for
alcoholic stimulants. This claim has
the endorsement of DR.. Samuel Bailey
Of Mt. Ayr, who, in a paper before the
State Horticultural Society in Des
Moines on Wednesday, asserted he
knew whereof he spoke and urged the
members of the society to investigate
for themselves and see if his state
ments were not true. Among other
things, he said:
THAT this is fact can or could BE-
proved in many instances If a little
care caution and vigilance were. re
sorted to, to thoroughly investigate
their conditions. AS a rule the habit
ual user of alcoholic stimulants Is
rarely lover or consumer OF apples
There seems to be peculiar combina
ton in apples, in the acid in them, or
in the peculiar chemical combinations
of the apple. that allays the irritation
or so-called appetite. produced by the
use of liquor am also of the opinion
that the keen appetite for tobacco IS
ilHliACQ .lA JhC uot vi tAllplCEF
Il am thoroughly convinced that an:
man who is lover of whisky and is III
condition when he thinks he mus
have a drink if he will eat an apple
before he takes the drink will fint
4 that his appetite for the drink has
4 been materially lessenei il not entire
( ly abated for the time"
In further discussion OF the subjec
Dr. Bailey pointed to the fact that ap
K pies are never found In saloons or gro
shops as part of the free lunch menu
Instead, he said one finds all kinds o
richly spiced, sailed and peppere'
foods-just such foods as would stimu
late the appetite for liquor. This il
itself, he claimed, was strong proof O
his claim that the apple is the foe Q
/ intoxicants.
DR.. Bailey is a firm believer that an
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10

active business -announced in
joplin paper, began his business in a
stall way q few years ago. Casting
about for a means of livelihood he hit
UPON the sale of popcorn. There's
money in that business, If it is handed
properly This man knew how 10
handle it. One of his methods was
by the use Of printers ink. He was
an advertiser. He advertised much
and iudiciously. It brought results.
His business developed, and with mis-
increased business there came greater
profits. He had good thing. Ana
he himself says he made money be-
cause he advertised.
More than one apparently incon.
sequential business has been gooo
thing for the promoter because he mas
been a consistent advertiser
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
Taft ON the NEGRO.


William II. Taft in the Southern
Workman. The negro is absolutely
essential to the development of the
South His labor the South needs, and
the more you instruct that labor the
more valuable the negro becomes to
the South. Hence 1t is that the work
OF Hampton Institute has It's intrinsic
Importance. It is the solution of the
race question
do not believe, and ! do not think
most men believe, in too many crutch-
es for people who are trying to learn
to walk But if you furnish them just
enough education TO know how to use
their minds and their hands and their
legs in productive occupations, you
give them the instrument by which
they can help themselves, and then If
they are race which has the spirit to
help itself the future is before them
and the opportunity Is theirs.
Race feeling, race prejudice, is a
fact and man who does not recog-
nize 1t Is just exactly as Illogical as
the man who says that 000, 900 PEG.
pie now in the country cannot live
with the other 70,0O0,000 who are here
when they are already living here
/ There is race feeling, and you cannot
dispose of it by saying that 1T oughi
I not exist, and that is part OF The
4 problem.
Now how are yon going to wipe |
out to the extent of making it so tina
it shall not produce injustice and ;
lack of harmony between the tw,
! races7 Well think you are going +
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
The Omaha World-Herald issued al

The Omaha World-Herald issued an
invitation to the insurgents to assume
positions in the ranks of the Demo
cratic party. The Waterloo Times
Tribune, also Democratic, suggests
that the insurgents would probab
gladly comply under more inviting
conditions, 1t says the Insurgents
would like to meet first and elect the
officers of the Democratic party.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10
keokuk, Iowa .... December 10, 1909.
PHILOSOPHY.

If there's no sun, still can have the
moon;
If there's no moon, the stars my needs
suffice;
And if they fail, have my evening
lamp;
Or lampless, there's my trusty tallow
dip;
And if the dip goes out, my couch re-
mains
Where l may sleep and dream there's
light again.
Blanche Gray, in Harper's Weekly.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10

pies and intoxicants can never go to-
gether. He holds they are antagonis-
tic, and, further, that the time will
come when the scientific economic
and the sociological world will recog-
nize this greater function and mission
of the apple.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1909-12-10

are sometimes most discriminating in
behalf of their patrons in the supplies
they order, the tastes and fancies of
certain persons sometimes assuming
almost grotesque proportions. To
meet all these demands 1t will be seen
that Uncle Sans storekeepers in
Washington must not only be courte
Gus and obliging at all times, but must
also anticipate the wants of 100000
00c people.