davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1909-06-05

men folks have u keen admiration Tor
the girl who is able to take care of her
self in the water.
IT'S about three times as hard to teach
a girl or young woman how to swim as
il is to teach boy or man. 1t seems
To be instructive according to my ex-
perience. for members of the female sex
to have dread of the water. The
thought of getting into water up to their
necks makes them hysterical or rigid as
the case may be.
Its altogether different with boy.
A boy takes to the water almost as nat
urally as a pup SEAL ! don't know
Evening star., 1909-06-05

tive to- the almost weird and alarming
precocity OF his little four-year-old girl
who. happening to have seen a dog upon
the street that morning. points the dog
out to her mamma. and remarks. with
almost baleful brilliancy, oh. mamma,
see re bow-wow!
Moreover. you are supposed. you know
to laugh real loud over these tender. ap-
pealing little "reminiscences.
mot that he will cease telling you
these delightful little things II you fail
to burst into peal upon peal of unre-
strainable merriment-not at all. He'll
go right on telling EN- to you even If the
stories move you to bitter tears.
But II you don't hold your sides and
shrek and beg him to desist II he would
not see you lapse into dangerous hys-
teries he's liable to go home and tell his
wife that you're cold blooded, heartless
gink, and that he wouldn't be a bit sur.
prised If you made a practice OF surrep-
titously twisting little children's arms
Evening star., 1909-06-05

your mobile features you might just as
well cut the next two hours out of your
prearranged schedule; you're a goner for
that period or longer.
He never appears to have reflected
that young ones have been saying and
doing the same identical things ever
since the days when rampageous glaciers
were chasing huge tribes of our remote
forebears across the Shiny plains, and
that what the iridescent kidlet of today
delivers himself or herself of in the way
of spicy humor was got of just like that
by the toddlers who ate buttons and pins
and fell downstairs in the epoch of the
Hyksos or Shepherd Kings of Egypt.
THE only way to handle the man who
is always talking about his young ones is
to hop him the instant he begins.
Watch him closely. When you per-
ceive that his loose. fiabby features are
beginning to contract into grin you may
know by experience that he is on the
Evening star., 1909-06-05

just to hear 'em holler.
There is never. by the remotest chance.
as much point or pith to one of his stories
about his young ones as there is to a
yard of rag carpet of the common or
garden variety or to string OF deceased
catfish.
But that consideration doesn't bother
him any. He goes right ahead pouring
'em out to you, and he always siaps his
thigh over the narration and tears Of
pure joy flood and overflow his lamps
and 1t doesn't take more than one-six-
teenth Of an eye to see that he considers
each and every one OF his tow heads a
sort Of animate Joe Miller's Joke Book
when 1t comes to that hot wit thing.
"He generally leads you to the laughter
when you are suffering from neuralgia
or the consciousness that you didn't play
that jackpot hand properly the night be-
fore. and If you are weak and flaccid and
wabbly enough to permit even the ghast-
lest apology for a smile to appear upon
Evening star., 1909-06-05

finally they asked about the brave and
fearless missionaries. her friends
Where are they goins?' they tenderly
inquired
she rocked her body back and forth and
raised and lowered her arms in regular
campmeeting fashion; 'Oh, oh. They is
going to Ohio!"
Whereupon the married pair peat IT
that they might have Mysteries in pn-
vate.
ZONE unique and delightful tales are
~ found In the ca BILE news from Germany.
The latest has to do with treasure trove,
always an interesting and attractive sub
tect In any quarter of the globe 1t seems
that workmen In repairing the town hall
in a good-sized town In Germany found
a document setting forth that in the
thirty years war the town authorities.
fearing the approach of the enemy. buried
in the hall of the town hall all the Public
funds. amounting, 1 believe. to something
over $1,OOO,OO0 in our money. The only
directions for the finding of the treasure,
which, apparently. was still in it's vault
in the masonry, were in connection with
the shadow of the steeple of a church
which formerly stood about 100 yards
from the hall. but which was torn down
some thirty years ago. Where the tip of
the shadow of the church spire fell on
the wall at q certain hour In the after
noon there, and nowhere else, was the
treasure to be found.
Did these present-day burghers sit down
and bewail the loss of their treasure? Did
they bemoan the destruction of the
church and decide to tear the whole town
hall to pieces in order to find the gold?
They did not. They dug up the plans OF
the old church, figured out to a fraction
building a temporary structure on the
same site
1--WE will find the shadow" they say,
land then, or course. the gold" The idea
of failure doesn't seem to enter into their
calculations at all. II they are success
full it's ten-to-one shot that half the
Evening star., 1909-06-05

human existence. making life one long
red. white and blue parade. But some
wondrous pronouncements are pulled off
in its name.
Just the other day there was blast in
the papers from some London scientist
learnedly setting forth the advantages OF
cannibalism. Dog fed on dog became
more doggy than ever, argued this high
Evening star., 1909-06-05

lures of natives tapping the trees and
collecting the rubber. and SO on.
He got them rubber mad. They pleaded
to be allowed to get into the new COM
pany with their savings. He didn't seem
to be eager to let them In. and so they
wound up by demanding that he let
them In. At length he let these early ones
have few thousands Of shares In the
new plantations at 81 per share.
They passed the word around among
their friends and neighbOrs, and these,
too. became interested In rubber. They
hunted up the inErattating rubber man
and he permitted them to accrue some OF
the stock at $50 per share. He confined
his operations exclusively to the neigh
borhood of his boarding house-a region
embracing a radius of about five squares
in different directions.
Then somebody came out with a word
OF doubt as to whether the Chiapas rub
ber plantation was entirely on the level.
The doubtful word reached the ears OF
the rubber man. He f1ared up instantly.
and then he did An audacious thing. He
told the people who had purchased stock
of him that he wanted them to select the
most reliable man in the neighborhood to
accompany him to Mexico to have look
at that Chiapas rubber plantation. They
picked out a medical man OF the best
repute and together the rubber man and
the doctor hied down to Chapas, Mexico.
The rubber man showed the doctor
sure-enough rubber plantation in Chiapas
and even took him to the hacienda on the
plantation that he pretended was his own.
and showed him the interior fittings and
furniture. The schemer happened to be
possessed OF the Information that only the
foreman OF the plantation was living In
the hacienda at the time. and as the fore
man didn't know the game of the CRATER
from Washington, he didn't let any word
fall TO give the snap away or to indicate
Evening star., 1909-06-05

class by herself She won't work on
Saturday however, as she is a Seventh
Dav Adventist. and my friends get
day. Ordinarily. too, this cook i'm a
thousand ways is happy clam
sings about her work and never has a
prouch-that is. she possessed all these
virtues until about a week ago. Since
then she has been the personfication of
hash and moistening the pie crust with
her tears. And. finally, unable to stand
II any longer without comment, the mar
ried pair, much perturbed resolved to
find out what the matter. So Fri
day, after they had finished their din
ner. they called in the cook
Maria, they chorused. what is the
trouble? You are unhappy. Confide in
us. We will help YOU
But Maria refused TO be comforted. She
explained that four of her closest friends
had decided to give up the pleasures of
this world. desert the flesh pots, beat 1t
away from the gewgaws-or words to
that effect-and become missionaries. She
would never see them again. They would
die in the wilderness. They were lost
To her forever. Then there was regu-
lar sob fest
The married pair felt at a loss in the
presence of such reflected self-denial,
such personal sorrow, as this. They COM
forted Maria as best they could, and
Evening star., 1909-06-05

About His Young Ones.
Il am moved to propose this because
this person is a sin and a shame in our
midst.
He is a peripa tetc pulp-nut, an ttin-
Grant imbecile and a null-and-void nui-
Evening star., 1909-06-05

brow, and consequently man fed on man
would be a real manly proposition He
had conducted experiments with CANNES,
he set forth, but hadn't. started in as
vet on the other end OF the proposition.
He 'ad 'opes, however. twas apparent
from his dissertation, that some day he
Evening star., 1909-06-05

OST Of the bad men
that I met up with
back yonder in the
days when real
bad men actually
existed were so ver-
satile in their
moods, to put it
that way, that. no.
body could figure
out just what they
were liable to do in
a given case" said
Evening star., 1909-06-05

S WI NJ NJ j n G in.
structor of long ex-
perience says these
things:
More girls and
women take SWIM
ming lessons now
adays than boys
and men. The fact
has been gradually
trickling in upon
the consciousness OF
young women that
Evening star., 1909-06-05

HY do SO many
sWindlers, some OF
them adroit, but
most of them mere
iy- plausible. pounce
upon Washington
as a field for their
operations?
This question oc-
Cured to me a
while back as
often ii had oc-
CURED before -
Evening star., 1909-06-05

H E sauare-jawed.
griZZled man with
the rumbly tones
was dishing it out.
Let us now"
he suggested, "re-
solve ourselves into
a committee on the
knock for the pur-
pose of administer
ing a few rogue
mallet taps on the
gutta-percha skull
re AiuyovS ToILinp
Evening star., 1909-06-05

NINE fearless aviators. bravins every
~ fate.
One was somewhat indisposed"; then
there were eight.
Eight fearless aviators want to soar to
heaven.
One died and passed away and now
they're seven.
Seven fearless aviators. taking Of their
tricks.
One talked himself to death: then there
were six.
Six fearless aviators. very much alive.
One preferred to stay so; then there we're
FIVE.
Five fearless aviators-counting's such a
bore
One said his feet were cold; then there
were four.
Four fearless aviators: one was up tree;
Said he thought he'd stay there; tnen
there were three.
Three fearless aviators. gazing at the
blue.
One strained his vocal cords; then there
were two.
Two fearless aviators; contest just begun,
Ones machine 1t wouldn't ny; then there
was one.
One fearless aviator. think his name Is
Wright.
Hoped aboard his aeroplane: soon was
out of sight
n MACON of Arkansas. whom 1 have
had occasion previously TO mention in this
column, Is continuing. as everybody will
be happy to know. his determined efforts
to win the title of THE John Wesley
Evening star., 1909-06-05
SUCCESS TALKS-BY DIR. MADISON c. PETERS,
FOLLOW THE BENT OF YOUR GENIUS

The world does not demand that you
should be q great man. but that with a
noble purpose. q high endeavor and a
useful end in view you shall make your
self q master in your line.
You may know that you have FOUND
your place IL your work is a pleasure to
you. If you long for the time to quit
you are on the wrong job. II you go to
your work with no more delight than you
left it the job belongs to some other man.
When you have found your true calling
you will not find nature putting any bar
riers in your path Of progress.
II you have been boring away in the
same hole for years without striking oil
you have either got too short an auger
or you are In the wrong hole. Have the
courage to change your occupation until
you find the right place. When you strike
water you will find use for your fins.
"A rolling stone gathers no moss. but
sometimes "a change OF pasture makes
fat calves
If you are on the right track you will
not be wondering whether the rails are
laid down right-you will know 1t by the
way things run. In the right place you
will be resourceful, happy and contented
you will expand and grow and be at least
comparatively successful You may not
make a fortune in a congenial occupation;
it Is possible to be millionaire, and still
be failure.
Evening star., 1909-06-05

MARRIED pair /
know have a jewel
of a colored cook.
She has been with
them a couple or
years, never gives
any trouble. is al
ways on time in
the morning. kick
eth not IL dinner Is
late. minds the
ba by, runs errandS
and generally Is in
Evening star., 1909-06-05

town halls in Europe-and maybe few
in this country-will be sacrificed on the
long-shot basis.
q CCIENCE is grand thing when 1t
- doesn't turn sonersaults. 1t is solv-
ing mysteries, lengthening the span OF
Evening star., 1909-06-05
special Correspondence Of The Star.

NEW YORK, June ), 1909.
Evening star., 1909-06-05

would find way to prove his theory TO
the limit.
The papers spoke of him as famous
scientist. If that's the case he might BET
ter be employed trying to f1nd way TO
manufacture sandpaper from elephants
breath or to drive machinery with vocal
hot air than tearing his shirt endeavor-
ing to demonstrate that we should strip
ourselves Of the thin veneer of civiliza-
ton and crawl on our stomachs down the
lane Of time for few thousand years
or so.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
A Lazy Liver

MAY be culy a tired liver, or q starved
liver IL would be- stupid as we'll u,
savage thing TO beat a weary or starved
man becau. 8 he Jagged IN his work 81
In treating the tagging, torpid liver II Il,
a great mistake to lash II with strons
drastic drugs. A torpid liver is but al
indication c. an ill-nourished, enfeebleo
body whose organs are weary with ove'
work. Start with the stomach ard alice
organs Of digestion aud nutrition. Pg!
them in working order aud see how
quickly your liver will become active
Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery
has made mo. : marvellous cures Of "l,rc'
trouble by "a wonderful control OF :. =
organs OF d scstiyn aHd nutrition i -
stores the normal activity OF the stomach
increases tho sccrc lions of the blood.maL
ing glands. cicans.s tho system from ~.
sonnus accurU'lliuis nd so relieves Ga
liver OF the Jurlnns imposed upon IL b
the defe. lo1 OF other organs.
II you hcrc iitrror had taste In fho roCrf
Ing, poor or urNariablO appetite. coated tOnkct
tout breath. coEs'Y.t"d or irreg,ler howe.
teel weak. eas!lA urcd. oCsyQndvbt. irrVurr
headaches, pain 9rdis,resSSp small " hac'
mawlng OF dlspvsSoG krNlg IN slomscl
perhaps nauss a, ,NssN<ss>-a'NsJaT "rls.ngs" j.
throatsafter estirg. and k.noCN symptom
OF weak stomach aud torpid Inn ~ mel
cline will relieve YOU NOR prompilI g.
rcu rlct.-J aiFn - =. lIl-ci-I I-e-
SoIdpn Nc, nl Dlsc1ycry. Perhaps Os
part o. 'he s5oTe symptoms will be prese
At one time AID yet point TO torpid llVern
bIilousness Ani weak stomarh Avoid .
hbt bread sn5 biscuits gridGle cakes a
other lndigo~ii rlc food srd axe the "Golt
Medical Discovery trl''' url, aud stick &c g.
use until you gfv vic, i,us ara strong.
The "DiscoVcrs is uOn secret, nOn-Alrf
holb,. Is a glyc,fic rVifNrt OF native mrG G.
nal roots with ti;'l I. " its insrtGit1'
printed ON each bot lr- wrapper and a'tcS o..
under oath tts ngrHlinnts are rbd. rt',
and extoIled by ,he most eminent np.,ira
writer's OF tn, are and are recommended 'G
cure the diseases for which II is advised
Don't accept substitute OF unknowe
composition for this non secret nEDICin'
or KNOWS ooNt UsITloN.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
Up TO Winchester Bay.

a pleasing good. high grade. truly
nayored. amber colored cup OF eoflee
can be had-and without the real
conee danger, or damage TO health
by simply using DR.. Shops new sub
stitute, called Health Coffee" Pure.
wholesome. toasted cereals, malt.
nuts, etc, make DR.. Shops Health
Coffee both healthful and satisfying.
No 20 TO 80 minutes tedious boiling.
Mai mi ,l.- says rr. Shoo1
n served as coffee. it's taste will even
tr ck an expert. Test il and see. j.
W. Harritt.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
THE MARKETS

San Francisco, Sept. 2.--wheat-
New crop: California club, $1.7OQ
.1.75; Australia, s1.95@2; Sonora,
s1.sO@1.95; new crop, northern, Sep.
delivery, bluestem, $1.s5Q1.s7h
club, s1.67h; turkey, $1.sOQ1.s5;
red, Sl,65q167h; of grades of
wheat. $1,000 1855,
Barley-Feed barley, S1.Ss%@
.1.4O, choice. slim common to
fair, s1.S5@1.S7h; brewing and
shipping, Sl.421s Q1.4S%; fancy,
$1.45; chevalier nominal.
Eggs-Per dozen, fresh. including
cases: Extras, S9c; firsts, S5c; sec
onds, soc; thirds, 24c.
Butter-Per pound: Extras, 31c;
firsts, 29c; seconds, 27hc; packing
No. 1, 24hc.
New cheese-Per pound: Califor-
mia fats, fancy, 16hc; firsts, IS 5hc;
seconds, 14hc; California Young
America fancy, 16hc; firsts, 15c;
eastern oregon. 16hc; New York,
is &c; Young America, t6hc.
Potatoes--New crop, per Genital:
70d soc In sacks; Salinas nominal.
Sweet potatoes in crates. per pound,
2@2hc.
onions--Yellow. 70@SOc per CEN
tai.
oranges--A box; Valencias, $3.50
@s.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02

have yet to visit the Curry county
beaches and would have done so this
year If that old dead game sport r. d.
Hume were sill alive.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
4 BurgIar ln Town

His name Is bad cough" He does
~-' care 70 gold or silver but he
" n tai your health away. II he
appears n your house arrest him at
once with Ballard's Horehound
Sv up. Z may mean consumption II
you don't. A cure for all coughs.
colds and chest troubles Price 25e.
soc and 800 per bottle.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
GREAT CHINESE DOC.oR
l.. NJ. HAM

has medicine which will cure any
known disease. ..e makes a specialty
Of and gu, ran.ees % cure Caiarrh
'Asihmp. Lang, Throa, rheumatism
Debility stomach Liver kidney
troubles: also any blacke ed or
swollen soreness broken limbs
Smenpcx Epidemic IN kinds OF
Boils os, Manh5ol F,male Weak
aess Iieruis Troubles and Paralysis
CJusui'rton free Care OF Nlck N
rong CO Chinese iruss herbs
i,a h'sh s'Tes uPs'airs Salem or
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02

A trip OF about q thousand miles IN
western oregon by land and water
is worthy OF some little chronicle.
The trip began with a drive by horse
from Newport, Yaquina bay, to the
Willamette valley. IL is one of the
most delightful trips imaginable, over
the Coast range on good roads that
are not travelled enough to be very
dusty, shaded by big timber and
along beautiful waterways. The
drive up the Yaquina valley shows
many fine ranches. abundance of
feed for cattle. plenty of fruit and
vegetables. and good fishing in the
river. On the banks are fine places
for summer cottages and picturesque
ts for bungalows. The river af-
fords fine bathing, good trout fish
ing and abundance of salmon and
game in season. There are still
plenty of places for stock ranches
and the prices of lands are not high.
Camped at Blodgctt.
We stayed over night at Blodgett
at the Hotel West, and found MIR, and
Mrs. West delightful hosts who sup
ply good meals and clean beds and
take excellent care OF horses. They
found we were from Salem and asked
II we were a bridal couple, as It
seems that description OF people make
a practice OF stopping at their house.
But they treated us Just as well as
II we were on wedding journey.
The rest of the trip to Salem was
uneventful. and the next day we went
to Portland and took the steamer
Breakwater Il Is a fine ship with
powerful engines and a captain who
Is character He has sailed from
all the ports of the new and old
world and has kept a sunny dispo-
sition that bubbles forth in poetry
and admiration for the beauties OF
nature and the fair sex. He has
photographs OF many distinguished
ladies who have travelled with him
and who all think well of Captain
McGenn.
The Breakwater is fast vessel
and sails on a steady keel driven at
a speed OF 12 TO 10 knots per hour.
The meals are as good as the mar
kets afford, the berths are clean and
the discipline. splendid. There was
almost no sea sickness among the
passengers and the ship crossed the
bars going out OF the Columbia and
coming into Coos bay without any
one knowing II unless they happened
10 be on deck watching the move
ment of the ship. can recommend
this vessel and the management TO
all who contemplate a trip 10 Coos
Bay. We had now come nearly five
hundred miles OF our trip. The rest
was a continuous round of pleasure
and sight seeing, and the people OF
Coos Bay more than kept up their
reputation for hospitality. Sunday
We Joined an excursion to Coquille
and Bandon, down the river at the
sea, adding a hundred miles 10 our
travels.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02

81 n-neeked pride OF authority Is
responsible for half the diseords the
world has known.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1909-09-02
Several Side Trips.

There was an excursion down the
day in ne marine parade, a wonder
full clam bake at North Bend, and
launch rides up the Coos river that
made another hundred miles.
The Capital Journal representa-
tives, in spite of their previous bad
record as destroyers OF fish. game,
clans and other delicacies OF Banker
Jo. BENEFITS pantry store room, were
entertained by that gentleman in his
truly royal and old-fashioned style OF
hospitality, which knows no limit for
the fortunate guest. His charming
daughter. Elsie Bennett McKeoghn.
presides in that delightful Informal
manner that makes every one feel at
home from the moment of arrival un-
I'll departure. she is the mother of
a baby son and daughter that are the
JOY OF their grandfatheT's heart The
visitors were also chaTmingly enter
tanned with a bungalow banquet up
at the summer home OF Mr.. and Mrs.
Mccormae on Coos river. and Mrs.
McCormac was assisted at the func-
tion by some young ladies of the kind
that make Coos Bay famous Th
salmon was cooked in pit OF coafs,
and ashes and had been taken from
the river the night before. and who
ever has eaten thereof knows thar
salmon cooked in that manner tastes
like food for the gods
Have Seen Many HarbOrs.
l have now been into every harbor
fed by any considerable stream on the
Oregon coast excep Gold Beach /
have been along the beach all but
two short stretches between Ten Mile
creek south OF Cane PerDetua and
Heceta Head light d the beach be-
tween Cape Arago and Bandon. 7