The Marshall republican., 1909-12-03
Press Clippings

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3 Press Clippings {
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Stanberry Owl: A nursing bot
tie has been found that was used
5000 years before Christ. Hereto
fore we had presumed that the chill
dren OF that early day boarded at
home.
aIhere was a cherry tee N bloom
at the editors home last week."
says the Ladonia Herald, and this
is no lie.n A cherry tree and the
inability to lie about it go .ogeth-
er in this country.
A schooiboy was asked to ex-
plain the formation of dew. His
answer was: "The earth revolves
on it's axes every twenty-four hour
and in conse luence of the tremen-
dous pace at which it travels 1t
perspires freely"
A deaf but pious English lady,
visiting a small country town in
Scotland, went to church armed
with an ear trumpet. The elders
had never seen one, and viewed it
with suspicion and uneasiness. At
ter a short consultation one OF
them went up to the lady just be-
fore the opening of services and
wagging his finger at her warning
ly, whispered, zone foot and ye're
oot."
A man when told that too much
smoking was responsible for his
loss Of appetite, figured a minute
and then replied that at "present
prices, tobacco was cheaper than
grub"
~ would not marry you IL you
were the only man on EARTH" said
the maiden. "No," said the hateful
man, "of course you wouldn't. In
that case / could get any girl l
wanted"
Boston Traveller: The Kansas
lover runs not overmuch to lyric
rhapsodies, but he is original. One
wrote his sweetheart: N would
rather listen to you chew gum than
hear Caruso sing"
A rich story has come to the sur
face at Glenwood a little town a
few miles north Of Kirksville, says
an exchange. Tom Caywood a
farmer living q few miles southwest
Of Glenwood, came to town a day
or two ago and meeting an old
friend, John Dodson, who is a big
rawboned Irishman, said: "John,
Pm here to get my half Of that
money" and thereby hangs a tale
Five years ago Dodson and Cay
wood got a good supply Of JOY
water at Glenwood and started on
their way home, eight miles south
west of town at a rather late hour.
Their road led by Bethel cemetery,
which stands on a rather isolated
spot a few miles out of Glenwood.
When they rode up to the burying
ground they saw a wagon and team
near the fence, and heard voices of
two men coming from the cemetery
The two farmers concealed them
selves in the brush nea the road
to see what was going on in the
cemetery. Presently the two men
emerged from the grave yard con-
veying a body which was put into
the wagon and covered with a can
vas. They then went back into the
yard to fill up the open grave.
While they We're gone Dodson and
Caywood stole from the brush and
carefully took the body from the
wagon and laid it beside the fence
in a dark corner. Dodson then crawl
ed into the wagon and covered him
self with the canvas. The grave
snatchers returned from their work
and started towards Kirksyille, fol
lowed by Caywood. After they had
travelled a mile or SO they began to
feel chill resulting from their
hard labor and free perspiration,
and one OF them drew a big black
bottle and proposed a drink. The
other grabbed the bottle and said,
WLet1s give the stiff q drink bod