The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-03-14
,DRIFTWOOD

Between the Big Stick and the Big smile?
 Why can't the Tariff take some of these widely advertised obesity reme-
 A man named Morning has eloped from Philadelphia with an affinity named Knight All very well. per and Morning should ever break, we can see a life-sized picture of somebody making noise like a divorce.
 All is quiet along the Potomac." says The Savannah Press. Even the big made noiseless."
 This has no reference to Speaker Cannon has 1t?
 wearing of any form of headgear in her theaters. This will not help mat ters much however, if the women there wear their hair In the fashion in which they wear 1t in the United States. the hats might as well remain on for the stage is just as effectually shut off.
 Darwin smoked cigarettes and be- lieved that man was descended from monkey, which goes to prove that
  said were not Incompatible, whatever one may say of them.
 Even the elements gave Teddy the cold shoulder-he went out of office in a blizzard.
 Senator Foraker received a loving cup from his friends, the negroes. He earned 1t all right.
 Mr. a,x lx f-A- ed in religion now than politics. Good for Bllly--perhaps in his race for a seat Up Wonder, he will not lose out.
 Don't be too severe on Teddy--re- member 1t isn't every private citizen who can go to Africa and be lionized.
 Thirty-five thousand workmen have gone on strike In a Lynn shoe fac tory. The funny thing about these their soles they will get revenge If they have to get on their uppers. ., The sheath skirt will stay says a fashion journal. It won't stay to- gether, however. so drive on.
 About time for the peach crop to be- gin to blush rosy red at the mean things the papers say about her. , "one good turn deserves another" remarked the organ grinder as he turned out the best tune he knew and eyed the approaching pedestrian ex- pectantly as he heard him rattling some dollars.
 Arkansas will permit the sale of alcoho! for art purposes only. But all the old topers are artists when it comes to nose painting
 Answering The New York Suns in the world" we would say. your uncle" at the Sign of the Three Balls when you are flat broke.
 A Washington waiter put out a guests eye the other night presum- ably to prevent him from seeing the figures on-his bill and thus dying of walters have a more humane method: : they invariably place your check on the table face downward to give you ample time to prepare for the worst.
 When The Roses Bloom. When the roses bloom again When the birds sing their refrain. When there's fragrance on the trees From the blossoms On the trees. When doves mating--bill and coo Lovers hearts a beating true, Underneath the cobalt sky
 That's the time when I would die. Not in winter, when the snow, Falls and the keen north winds blow, Not In summer or in fall. Would I like to hear Deaths call, But in Springtime when the rose First blooms out at winters close, When the whole worlds full of joy And there's nothing to annoy, When the sweethearts' VOWS are made Down the old lane in the shade, Where each daisy bows its head. Like 1t really missed the dead, Here I'd lay me down to sleep And pray the Lord my soul to keep!
 P. H. A.