The Birmingham age-herald., 1909-09-11

"If there is anything on the face of the earth that I abominate it is the woman who has place for everything, and everything for its place." said the girl as she took off her puffs and laid them on the mantlepiece, kicked off her slippers and left them in the middle of the floor and took off her new straight-front corset and laid 1t on the bureau.
 Well, of course you'd feel that way" replied the systematic woman who busted herself with placing her clothes in per- feet order, as she disrobed after morn- ing's shopping tour, her chapeau going into its hat box, her shoes onto trees in the closet, and her coat and skirt on a clothes hanger. and her portable coiffure into a neat little receptacle in her dress ing table.
 Well, now what have you ever gained by such performance?" asked the un- systematic girl with a sarcastic infection, as she watched her friend busying herself with all these trihing details. You are as thin as a rail, you are nervous, and everybody is always fussing and fuming with you because they cant find their be-. longings"
 Well, at least l know where my things are," said the systematic woman in rather hurt tone. Why l can get up any time of, the night and put my hand on any ar- ticle of clothes or jewery or anything else that I possess. ''
 Well, who wants to be doing that sort of thing inquired the unsystematic girl. Half of the pleasure 1 have in life is spent in my top bureau drawer roofing through yards and yards of ribbon and lace and frils and furbelows for some- thing I want"
 T simply couldn't live that way said the systematic woman.
 T suppose l was born that way, and have kept it up ever since but I quite agree with you that one doesn't get any thanks for tidiness and ordiliness, and sometimes think it doesn't pay where other people are concerned, but I keep 1t up. just the same.'
 Well, I was cured of that sort of thing long ago." said the unsystematic woman, signing heavily. And I'll tell you what finished me One day after I had spent my energy, temper and religion on clean ing up and putting things in order my husband came home one evening and Topped himself down at the writing desk to do some correspondence. No sooner was he seated than l heard the cry of:
 Where's the big botter? You know I always despised these little pink and blue ones'-
 And where is my memorandum book that I left in the second pigeon hole of the desk'-
 And what did you do with my bank book? I left it right out here in full view the last time I used it?"-
 And where in the name of heaven can I find the stub pens? There was a whole box of them here day before yesterday ?"-
 "And where are the large envelops that l always use? I can't find any but these little old dinly monogrammed ones of yours.
 And what secret drawer contains my penknife, that you know is the pride of my life?'
 And a thousand and one other ques- tons that made me so mad didn't know what to do. So, then and there, I made up my mind that would never clean out that writing desk again as long as live. and that 1t mattered not how unsightly 1t looked in the library or how disorderly it appeared I would never touch 1t again.
 Perhaps you didn't start early enough with that sort of thing when you were first married" bIandly suggested tho Systematic Woman.
 "A man ought to be glad if a woman ever begins that sort of thing" said the Unsystematic Woman. pettishly, And I for one never mean again to bother my head with those things. A man likes a woman to look pretty and attractive and never appreciates her if she has worn herself out with trying to have a sys- tenn"
 q suppose it Is largely a matter of habit" said the Systematic Woman, "and I wish I could be the other kind, but simply can't live by system-I get up by system; I eat by system; I sleep by Iystem and"
 You'll die by system. If you don't