davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

Gnard Boostrum's military abll-
ity is in consonance with his ami
ability.
Brigham Young, jr, intlmates
he will soon catch up with his chop
suey appetite in that dear OLD MIN
neapolis.
The new butcher is now known
as Butch, jr. He has long ways
to go to become as "welghty as
his predecessor.
Money is cheap. stuff; friends are
priceless. Let me be rlch III
frieuds.-Ralph Parlette. Onlver-
sity of Hard Knocks
mo one need blow or brag about
nolseless guns said one OF the
boys. "We've got that skinned
with our noiseless talk
Tailor Nelson says, loose hts
are all the go around here "leS'
chimed in chap. "Loose tits here
tight fits when we get out"
The Theatre Magazine each
month contains the taking parts OF
the dialogue of some popular play
This makes very interesting read
ing.
The barber of the mild blue
ewes has reached the pinnacle OF
fame. The local poet laureate has
embalmed his name in rhyme
not Rhine.
Guard .Westlund says he is look
ing for a recipe that will put meat
on his bones. Guard Hartley is
looking for one that will produce
the opposite result.
Slim has lost an ounce IN weight
He walked through a shop the
other day and one OF the boys
remarked: "Didyou see that wis.,
of hay float by?'
"Iobserve the pastry cook neve
eats any pie or cake" remarked I
neighbor. mo-" was the response
Che makes them for Others to ca
same as all bakers do
"When the first day Of May ar
rived" said a Teller, Il felt yer,
much like moving to better nelgh
borhooi but my rent was pald II
advance for sometime ahead and
concluded TO stay and use it up.
"Lucky thing Prof. Bnrchar'
didn't stop the membership OF tn
Orchestra at H." observed a fellaf
sThe chaps around here all sh
at 13-even a pay check for Sl5.O
would throw scare into many c
'em."
The Technical World Magazln
is a publication particularly suite
to the needs Of local residents.
contains a vast amount OF useft
and practical information in eac
number. The subscription prio
is $1.5O per annum.
Davy says the best rule to folio
around here is ''to finish your bu
mess and git" He also intimate
that the Gossipers' Gazette is bein
oyerworked and only leads
bad results. Davy is philosoph'
come to judgment.
"What's the matter?" fello
asked the Deputy Warden's hus
ling chief clerk. "Oh, nothil
much,' he replied. "There WAS
new mattress put in my abo
Yesterday and it felt SO good | d
not sleep wink the whole night
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13
Diamond Dust.
l ~~~
BY r. Il.

better game In his lie says nls
first chief, Cap. Arson. What a
scream it would be if the Doves
beat out the Giants? Oh, JOY!
Dove Doings -Bowerman's out
fit is the real surprise package OF
the season. The four BIS leading
off for the Pigeons are left handed
batters. Chappelle, the Tri-State
kid has proved to be- the article
needed. Sweeny is playing third
like house a-6re.
MAJOR Music-Athletic Actions
Connie Mack has at last found a
real third sacker in Baker. 1t took
Mack six years to do it. Strunk is
the whole thing in center field.
Dan Murphy is playing a fine
game at second sack. The Athlet-
les look pretty strong and danger
GUS just now.
Quaker Quacks-McQuillan is
recovering from yellow jaundice.
Deininger was sent back to the
Minors along with Crist Hanford,
Hannifan and Oil. Pitcher Cor
ridon has reported and is in fine
condition even though he didn't
go south with the team. The
Phlllies had better brace up.
Brooklyn Boosts-Tim jordan
is playing real base ball this year.
Hummel continues to put up a
good game at short. Sebring Is
the same old Jimmy. Wilhelm
and Rucker are the two most re-
liable twirlers on the payroll. The
Trolley Dodgers have slumped
considerably of late but the season
is young yet.
Washington Wallops Walter
johnson is still on the sick list
Wild Conroy is the candy kid
Vice President Sherman is daily
visitor at the Senators play
grounds. Dolly Gray has proved
to be ounce. Waivers have been
asked on the veteran Jess Tannehill
Things do not look as easy as they
did before the gong sounded.
Detroit Dots-Jennings' mer
are sure naking lot Of noise. Ty
Cobb and Mig Clark Of the Maps
tried to start a rough house bu
Hughey said nix. Side Wheelel
Killian is slated for ride. The
Tiger owners have purchased
Bennett Park and intend to re
model it this fall. Wild Bill Don
ovan is still on the sick list
Willets Summers and Mullin art
o. k.
!, Brown B,ts-Law Criger battet
J against Cy Young at Cleveland TO
the first time in his life. Catcher
: Wells was turned adrift. Hoffmar
! and Sweitzer are still fighting TO
the center field Job. Harry Howell
will not be able to play until som
time in June owing to lame arm
The Brown supporters are far iron
elated over the work Of McAleer'
band thus far. Cheer up boys, tiv
, months left yet.
Cardinal Clouts- Bresnahan'
bows have fallen back into tn
:. eighth hole again. Rogers is work
lug like fend to strengthen hi
team but his efforts seem to ava
nothing. Lush, Beebe and Moor
are his only rsliable twirlers. ]
he is not in the game PERSONAL
! the youngsters blow up and ar
: easy meat for the opposition
: Here's hoping Rog succeeds i
landing in the first division.
+ WhiteSox Whispers-Once agai
= the Old Roman used the ak. BE
= it for Chi.,'' said Manager Billy
% Commy after the Sox got theirs
= St.Louis, you're counterfeit as
- mascot: Ed. Walsh has ne
- ho c;nns To Gnmiskau no
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13
SIDE LIGHTS * : s!:s
BY Avlso.

I The roof over the printing Office
| is a good deal like the home OF the
Arkansas farmer: "WKile it rains
] it leaks and can't be fixed. When
It doesn't rain it doesn't leak and
and doesn't need fixing The last
time it rained 1t leaked like sieve.
AngIicus says he will preempt
the use OF the editorial I'VE IN
future. He is the first Englishman
in captivity apparently who ever
preferred I'VE" to e. Now
wouldn't it sound nice to say,
"please, may we get outY Or,
"we think we will get out" Per-
haps Anglicus remembers the
proclamation to the King OF
England, headed: "We the People
of England, etc. which was found
upon investigation to have been
promulgated by three taiiors OF
Tooley street. "We' got It's first
Jolt upon that occasion.
| Old Butch now smokes a pipe
about five feet long-imported
from Germany. The bowl holds
abouta pint of tobacco. The stem
contains glass tube and other tix-
ings for cooling the smoke. When
Butch sits down the bowl OF the
pipe rests on the floor. The bowl
.. is of meerschaum and has a patent
! fire cooler or something likeit. And
, the whole thing cost him ST. o.,
including import duties. In this
country those pipes retaiI.for $1,000
or more. Butch says he is send
{ ing for one for Uncle John $50 he
, can have a COOL smoke once more,
? yet"
Following are the names OF the
;. canaries in The Mirror Office the
babies not counted: Hetty Green,
s Belva Lockwood, Carrie Nation,
p Nellie Bourne, Patsy Bolivar,
(maIe) and the Kid. Mrs. Green
: is the oldest of the females while
Carrie Nation is the youngest.
Mrs. Lockwood iss a scrapper, re-
Gently released from solitary con-
finement, while Mrs. Bourne, who
for a while was out of The Mirror
:. Office is an absolute faker. She
y ought to be shipped to India. An
l. orange recently dropped into The
n Mirror Office from the sky and was
[ given to the sextette above named
=" The way Mrs. Lockwood, Mrs
Bourne and Pat fought to get to il
q first was equal to any prize ring
e exhibition ever given. The Kid il
4. developing into the finest looking
y bird in the bunch. Those inter
" ested hope he will turn out to be
d singer. The females will Sc
steadily, off and on, from now unit
September-when they go into re
" tirement until about February.
IL Uncle Isaac says he has received
u large quantity of stuff of on
III kind and another from Soclalits al
20 over the country. He says tn
article he wrote on Socialism wa
- written during recess in the prin
shop-standing up. The articl
:. seems to have attracted attentio
80 as far East as Holyoke, Mass. IN
- two authorities" he says, "seem t
:, agree on what Socialism really is :
and when doctors disagree, vino
to prescribe? Debs says Socialism
w is one thing and instantly whol
st. lot of equally prominent Sociali'
ng leaders say he does not know wh'
, a he is talking about. The gre
de plant of Socialism is capital-b'
lid usually when a Socialist becom
t." a capitalist he renounces Socialism
Abraham Lincoln said capital
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

II observe the pastry cook never
eats any pie or cake remarked a
neighbor. NO." was the response,
Che makes them for others to eat
same as all bakers do
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

"When the first day of May ar
rived" said Teller, Il felt very
much like moving to a better neigh
borhool but my rent was paid in
advance for sometime ahead and L
concluded to stay and use it up. I"
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

Slim has lost an ounce In weight.
He walked through shop the
other day and one of the boys
remarked: "Didyou see that wlsp
of hay float by?'
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

Guard. Westlund says he is look
ing for recipe that will put meat
on his bones. Guard Hartley Is
looking for one that will produce
the opposite result.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

LUCKY thing Prof. Bnrchard
didn't stop the membership OF the
Orchestra at H." observed a fellah.
The chaps around here all shy
at 13-even pay check for Sl3.OO
would throw scare into many OF
'em."
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1909-05-13

The barber Of the mild blue
ewes has reached the pinnacle OF
fame. The local poet laureate has
embalmed his name in rhyme
not Rhine.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
On Knocking Former Teams.

To the Editor of the University MiSSourian
Does our bCasted new spirit, upon
which we pride ourselves so much
this year. still permit us to knock
on former teams, coaches or players!
| have recently heard not only stu.
dents but faculty members in the
University make disparaging remarks
about players on last years football
team. 1t seems to me that if we have
the genuine true Missouri spirit we
will refrain from discrediting the
ability or character of someone who
is not here to defend himself. We
are not altogether perfect ourselves,
and l think we are hurting ourselves
when we criticise a former team or
management. | believe we would be
better off if we followed the adage.
If you don't know anything good.
keep still about the bad
r. w. p.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
THE SAN FRANCISCO CASE,

The struggle in San Francisco to
bring municipal grafters to the point
where they can be punished has been
long and disheartening one, and
the ends OF justice seem yet un-
certain Of accomplishment.
The ramitications of the boodIing
system in that city were OF so con-
pick nature that men and corpora
lions Of the highest standing we're
involved. At the opening of the
struggle to purge the city of hoodlers
and grafters, Rudolph Spreckels,
owner OF the San Francisco Call,
otier"d to be one of ten men who
would put up $l00O00 to back the
prosecution. The ten men could not
be found in the city, and this modern
:-at ran down the list of righteous
rich men in search of assistance. but
"-ithout success. 1t had already been
seen that the dragnet would hold a
startling catch, and capital went into
hiding. Mr.. Spreckels supplied the
funds from his own pocket, and it is
estimated that thus far upward of
Sfo0.o00 has been expended in the
prosecution of the grafters.
As the investigation progressed
higher ups" we're involved. At this
point business men and reputable cit
iZens became lukewarm in their sup
i3I' II lie Fr"Secution. or withdrew
altogether. They urged that the cru
sade MIS- hurting business" and that
it had gone far enough" This was
natural. in some cases, for the trail
vas jer"iog their way. And so the
work OF convicting the guilty became
more difficult and the task more dis
hsaItoHlnS.
Francs ] Heney has been the central
fE'sr" in the fight to purge San Fran
cisco e the hoodlers. Endowed by
nature and by training with the fight
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
RESPECT FOR THE FLAG.

Recently during concert by mill
tary band in the East a colonel in the
regular army stopped the concert
when the band started to play THE
Star Spangled Banner" He declared
that the selection was a national air
ana not meant TO be played upon any
but formal occasions. His action
caused much Indignation.
During times of great national
stress, when a war lonfronts nation,
..ag5 are displayed upon every hand.
Ids play only the national airs and
,aopie sing only national songs. Let
I flag so b. and men take off their
hats. There is wonderful amount of
enthusiasm displayed which many
people think is patriotism.
When there is no war in progress
and 10 special occasion for the dis
play OF flag; it seems to be the pre-
Yailing IDEA that it is out of form
% salute the flag with formal respect.
II dlI army post during sunrise Ol It.
treat one seldom sees civilians pay
any salute to the flag as they watch
the soldiers at formal ceremonies.
here at the university when the cadet
band on dress parade plays the ma
tional air some students stand at at
tention with heads uncovered while
others stand about as though there
was nothing of importance going on.
Some remove their hats as though
they were ashamed of the act
When our own patriotic "Old Mis-
souri, is played it is a custom and
tradition that every one, no matter
where or what the occasion, must
rise uncovered. This is a good GUS
tom and one to be fostered. 1t is an
equally good custom to learn the
courtesy due to the national flag and
the national anthem and to pay those
courtesies on every occasion without
fail and without embarrassment
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
What Can Be Done?

To the Editor of the University Missourian:
Can't something be done to i'm
prove the lighting system in Column
bia? The light bulbs the other night
were so dull that only a red glow was
given off. 1t was impossible to read
at all. 1t looks as though there are
sufficient electrical engineers in Col
umbia to do something to remedy the
lighting plant here. Everybody knows
the lights are poor, why can't we find
out the reason and do something TO
improve it? Surely this condition can
not last forever. Let's find out the
reason, and all get together and see if
something can't be done Surely ev-
erybody is interested in improving the
lights. Why wait any longer?
A SU D.oCRIBER.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

ing spirit, mentally and physically
Mr.. Heney has shown remarkable
zeal and courage in tie long struggle,
Under continuous threats that his life
would be forfeited for his persistence
and carrying on his face the scar from
one bullet-from one attempt at as
sassination-Mr Heney has not
halted, has not once turned or deviat-
ed from his purpose. 1t may be an
easy task for a general to lead even
an almost hopeless cause in war,
backed by an undivided people.
Lacking in this support, as he is, Mr..
Ieney has a prodigious task before
him. He has met defeat at the hands
of juries number of times, but he
has arisen after each disappointment
seemingly more determined than ever
to convict every guilty man.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
Notes of Socie .

The thirty-nintil birthday of the
Kappa Kappa Gamma sorority was
celebrated by banquet at the CHAPTER
house on Hit Street Saturday night
Mounds OF lavender and white chrv.
santhemums banked the center of the
table and ribbons OF dark and light
blue were used. The guests, according
to a custom of the fraternity. wore
powdered hair. There were fort,
covers.
Mrs. Charles Rowling was toastmis.
tress. Toasts We're given by Misses
Berenice Vance, Caroline Jesse. Marv
Shore Walker. Helen Ross. Mary Pax.
ton, Ruth Eyersole, Rebekah Harris
and Frances Longan, and Mrs. Percy
Bordwell
Miss Florence Helm, of Hannibal
and Miss Edna Williams. of Boone.
vile, were in town for the banquet
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
Unipersity Colenda,

October % Football: Missouri VS.
Amcs, al Amcs, Iowa.
October 30 Football: Missouri VS.
Iowa at Iowa City. Iowa.
October &i-DedicatiOn Of new Y
NJ. {. 4 bEIldirg
November & Football: Missouri VS.
Washington. at St Louis.
November q, II III, to November 2s.
a. III. Thanksgiving holidays.
November l3. Football: Missouri VS..
Drake. at Columbia.
November p. Football: Missouri VS..
Kansas. at Kansas City.
December -, p. NJ, to January 4,
a m Christmas Holidays.
January 81 to February 5. Mid-year
examinations.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
OIL o. THE ROUGH.

The black race in general is content
to exist. The majority of negroes in
Missouri are content to live in the
rough. unpublished state OF their an
cestors. 1t is different with Otis NJ.
Shackelford. Missouri negro who
lives AT Kansas City. He is as black
as an! OF his race, yet he has branc.ltu
out in the literary field in order to
create more OF desire for higher
education among his people. and one
of his recent books is Seeking the
Best
In this book Shackelford has pub
lished the story OF his life and travels.
and also number of his poems, for
he has poetical aspirations also
Throughout the entire book the author
deals with the uplifting Of the men,
berS OF his race. and his intention
is to inspire them with higher ideals
and lottier thoughts. He gives advice
along lines which if followed would
raise the race 10 higher education and
knowledge.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
Germany Aids Aeronauts

Germany has Instituted meteoro.
logical service Tor the special purpose
OF aiding aerial navigation. All data
gathered in the European observa.
tories Will be sent there and collated
with those made IL Germany. The re.
suits will be sent out by telegram r.
the various German aero clubs, so tina,
they may know the probable cond;
uons which a balloon will meet as if
ascends.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
Almost a Break.

why don't You ever wear a low cut
gown"
The weather is changeable, and I'm
so delicate
But your sister wears extreme deco
lete''
Yes. she's indel-I mean she's not
delicate at all."-Exchange.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

1t is mans nature to seek to eyade
the law, whenever it interferes with
his pleasures. But does the evasion
pay in the long run? Even if success
full at first. the time must come when
the wrong-doer will be caught and held
to account for his miSdeeds
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

A few days ago fifty new meal per
mits were sold for the University
Dining club. Since then it has been
announced that girls will replace the
men in doing the work of the club. 1t
is expected greater demand than
ever for the meal permits will re-
suit.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
The Market,

Oct. 1S.-Generally unchanged. X.
L. opened 2 points lower. Strong bull
lish tendencies in Manhattan. Tiger,
preferred, dropped during the first
half Of Saturdays trading, but jumped
to par in the second half Iowa. Ames
and Washington steady with bearish
tendencies.
HERMAN HOELKE.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
IHE VALUE OE PUBLICITY.

Publicity makes people think
Where people think there is sure to
he progress. Ii each person should
contine his interest to the narrow
bounds OF his own life, he would stop
the development of his faculties, and
render himself useless to the outside
world His vision must be widened
This can be accomplished by publicity
alone, and nowhere so well as in the
columns of a real newspaper. The
investing advertiser is not the only
one who Pre- fits by the use of printer S
ink. The community as a whole, and,
therefore. each individual, reapS the
benefits Of newspaper work. The com
munity is led to denounce evil prac-
tees and to uphold those that are
beneficial. Whether or not the people
agree with the policies the newspaper
advocates. their minds are awakened
through the news stories, and they
are made to think for themselves.
The features in the lives of their fci-
To-. men. in the life of the world at
.rge, are brought before their eyes
and they form opinions for themselves.
Subjects that We're once foreign to
them become commonplace. They be
gin to think. and. therefore, develop.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
Just 'Sposin.'

To the Editor of the University MiSSourian:
suppose the person who wrote the
viewpoint under the head will the
Women Waltz" is a university woman
instead Of university man.
A ROOTER.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

The dim lights furnished by the Co
Iumbia Light and Power company may
be favorable for courtship, but they
are hard on the person who also
studies occasionally.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

One good effect OF the rain-it
washes off the streets and reveals to
us the unfamiliar sight of the bricks
again.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
VIEWPOINTS

lTh" University MisSouran invites contr.bu-
tons on matters ri University and columbia in
tcr-t. Til" Iiam- ut the writer >hou daccnmpany
>l!ctl letter. but will not h" printed unless de-
sired.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

1t is the man or student who thinks
who does things. Thinking has revo-
lutionized the word. Every man does
not think. He often imagines himself
to be thinking when he is not. 1t is
one of the easiest matters in the world
to drift along without thinking Wake
up and think! See where you are!
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

Columbia may be very old-fashioned
in some things, but it is very up-to-
date in the spirit of some of her citi-
zens. Stepping-stones and air ships
will be quite an unusual combination.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

If Ashland wants a trolley line she
will have to make the promoters a
fare proposition.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

Fine weather for ducks" remarked
the optimist, watching the rain patteI
against the window pane.
And for the umbrella snatcher.'
snarled the pessimist, feeling for
change to pay the gas bill.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
The red-headed Soph says:

There's difference between the
after-dinner and the after-a-dinner
speaker"
THE Tigers have scored Just 90
points more than their opponents.
See?"
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

80, .ok.i-n--.. splendid toned piano
cheap. Llso two heating stoves. q
typewriter, extension table and some
0t.l2r household articles. w. e. White
l3 Allen Place. Phone 1910 Green.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

Herman Hoelke. sophomore Jour-
nalist, and Roland Montague, a junior
engineer, have been pledged to the
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18
VARSITY NOTES
A ROOTER

Miss Alice G. Nuns, of Montgomery
City, Mo-, visited her brother, w. G..
Nuns, of the Jefferson club, Sunday.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

The old adage, There's nothing new
under the sum-" should be changed to
There's nothing old under the sun,
when sni,,e hunting is referred to.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

r'UN ftE.> l-.tUomS lOr Young men.
First class in every way; two single
beds and two lights in each room.
6C5 s. Fourth St, three blocks fron
campus.
University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1909-10-18

DIRT CHEAP-14 room 26 Benton
HALL You won't have to wogry
about heat or light. Gail any time
after meals. Lowenburg.