Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1909-11-12
TIE. STRANGE CASE OF SlLAS
WHITE.

The lazy man Of the village o.
Rawsonville was Silas White. ID
had been lazy for many years
There were several old resident:
who could remember that wher
he and his wife moved into the
village he was worker and am
bilious. Then one day he at
tended a circus and was kick q
by a giraffe. The circus men
gave him a dollar as damages
and sent him home. A doctor
examined him and said no great
harm had been done, but Silas
took it into his head that he had
received severe internal injuries,
and that any further labor would
| take him to his grave. He con-
vinced his wife of the fact, and
thus began his long and brilliant
career as a champion lazy man.
Mrs. White was an industrious
woman and a merciful woman.
By sewing and nursing she could
support herself and husband. and
she proceeded to do it Also to
coddle him and handle him care
fully. For a few months the
villagers thought that kick might
have been worse than the doctor
thought for, but by and by they
got on to the fact that Silas had
settled down to take solid COM
fort. Of course some of them
went to the wife about it and ad-
vlSed her to do this and that, but
her steady reply to all was:
''Silas is afraid his heart was
kicked out Of place by that gi-
raffe, and until we know for sure
| don't want him to take any
chances. If you'd hear him groan
in his sleep you'd feel sorry for
him."
For the first few months SilaSI
would chop a bit of wood oc-
caSionally or bring in a pail of
water, but he gradually slacken-
ed off, and after a year he had
struck his true gait. He either
loafed on the post Office steps IN
the village or sat in his rocking
chair at home. He grew too lazy
to even fish. Now and then
strangers sought to interest him
in politics, but it was too much
exertion for him to argue. He
was harmless and Good-natured,
and in time most Of the villagers
accepted the situation. The few
that didn't tried in vain TO work
reform. One evening Silas was
seized, flung into a wagon, driven
nine miles and dumped olt. The
idea was that he would have to
walk home. He didn't do it. He
went to the nearest farm house
and settled down there until the
farmer had to drive him back to
get rid of him.
A dry goods drummer visiting
the village heard OF the case and
recommended 4 cure and offered
TO administer it himself. AT
| midnight figure with horns and
hoofs and tail, and supposed to be
a good imitation of our old friend
down below, opened the unlocked
door Of the white cottage and
SiIaS and his wife were awakened
to find the intruder in their bed
room. Mrs. White screamed out
lin terror. Silas took a long
breath and asked what was
wanted.
/ want you!" was the answer
lin an awful voice.
What fur ?"
Il want you to come to the bot
tomleSS pit !"
Then you'll have to carry
me !" replied the champion as he
| turned over toward the wall.
1t was now realized that no.
Thing could be done with such a
man and for years Silas vas left
to enjoy his laziness in peace. 1t
was the general opinion that he
would he too lazy TO draw his
breath when the time came, and
that his accomplishing wife
would have to do it for him. There
was to come a change, however,
Ore day, after his wife had plac.
ed chair for him nnder an ap-
pie tree and left him to smoke
ard sleep, she noticed a thunder
storm creeping up in the west
1t was her duty to watch things
and bring Silas in before the
storm broke, but she suddenly de.
cided to make ar experiment. She
would leave him where he was
aud see if lie would seek shelter