The Mena weekly star., 1909-08-12
WILEY BIL IN
 GRAFT TRUBBEI

bel oyer the axshuns uf over preacher, the rev. Orther Docks. He, az he sed, to liveu up things, interJused wun uf theas singir masheens cauled Fonygraft. A larg Kongergashun wus presunt at ower las meetin an after au. nownsin uf his tex insted uf per ceadin with surmin as he used to do, he sed we wood hay sum sakrid mewsick on a masheen he'd kolleckted as preechin feas at Meaner.
 Very solum like he perjuced frum under a kiyer a big horn, jist like dinner horn only it wer shorter, the which wer anext to shiney box, and sot it onto a tabel.
 Then he sez, sez he, brethern and cistern, yu will awl heer that celebrated oal tyme him, "Weal Gether on the Bank uf the River"
 Evry wun uf his awgence hung on his wurds and yu cud heerd a hawg skweel haf mile. The parsin turnd krank an after skweekin an gronin like chokin koon in a dawg fite, hit struck up that faimus oald song. 'I won't go hoam til mornin, An 1 won't go hoam til mornin, til da lite dug apeer." Konsturnashun wer on the fais uf every christyun in the awgence, eggsept lot uf boys rum shugger krik and Mil krik, hu laft and clapt ther hans in grate aplaws.
 Parsin Orther Docks lukt like he wud faint, an wer shore bereft uf speach fur the spaise uf ? min its. After he cum ? hisself he sed as how ther wer mistaik in putin uf the song UT hit wer a tut up job onto him, but if his Kongregashun wud bee still he wud try nuther song. So the parsin, he skrued up the kritter an turnt it luce agin.
 After gronln and caufin a while, hit broak luce on a Irish Jig an yu never heerd sich rollykin singin an banjo pickin an horn tootin at church meatin in yore llyte. Oal ant betsy nashuns an Jain Wiggin Gnu air nole made boath tainted an fell onto the floar.
 The shugger krik an Mil Krik fellers laft alowd, and then a grabbin uf a gal peece tha danst and kavorted awl over the howse. unkle tommy mikrobe Gnu wer masht onto Jain Wiggin) bekum frantick; he savageously an with grate foarce kickt the fonygraft owt uf the winder. and then rusht ? the prostrait form nl Jain an pickin uf hur up, fled ? the krik (Shugger Krlk). Ina hay not ben scene sinst.
 unkel billy wobstun sed az how he'd ben a churcht member 7C yeres, but If he ever Jade ize onto Parsin o. Docks agin thared bee fte. (Parson o. Docks had disapeerd frum site). Bruthel c. Kraiu he sed that fonygraf, wer ag;n the law at meatin. ar that the airs uf parsin 0. Dock: cudent rekover damiges uf unke tommy mikrobe fur a destrawir of the fonygraft, an that If unke 
 tommy un jain wiggin wer seat no moar, Parson o. Docks mite be helt fer murder in ? degreas thar bein foaks missin.
 Little Bil Ahauts sed thot fony gratis wer good invenshun the hea injawied the meatin bettu than enn V meath hea ever attend ed: that hea wud tend meatin reg Ter if tha wud git masheen al yuse hit regler, hea sed as how the dentests and the taynru keap CTS at Meaner yused them al thet hea allus ct an put his jaw docktered whur theas masheen wur. Hea sed as how, P. kegge had wuu in his stoar an thet he
 wood hep ? by 2 masheens iu ower skool wun fur eech sect thet when weed got em starte' | hit wud maik us up ? dait a' uther ides an arguments wur bro forth by him Che air stndyin flu a skool teecher and noes how