The state herald., 1909-02-05
ROASTED BY THE
GRIDIRON CLUB
WITS AT ANNUAL DINNER SAY
FAREWELL TO ROOSEVELT
AND FAIRBANKS.
BUTTS OF MANY JOKES
HITS AT SPECIAL MESSAGES, ANA.
MAS CLUB AND GOVERN
MENT DETECTIVES.

ashington.-Farewel to President
| Roosevelt and Vice President Fair
banks-in their official capacity only
was said to them Saturday night by
| the famous Gridlron Club of Washing
ton newspaper men. The occasion
was the annual winter dinner of that
club. In all, there were nearly 200
guests, and, as is always the case, the
roll included many names that figure
conspicuously in the hall of fame. Am
bassadors, justices of the Supreme
Court Of the United States, Cabinet Of
ficials, senators, representatives. edi-
tors. publishers, and men of affairs
generally were in the gathering.
The temperance movement showed
its effect on the club. AS the souvenir
of the dinner, the guests were given
"H2O illustrated Gridiron Almanacs.
published by the Gridiron Waterwagon
Press" Between its covers there was
no remedy given for the ills of states
men, journalists, real newspaper men,
mollycoddles, malefactors OF great
wealth other than plain 'H2O.'".
In this almanac the TEDDY Bear"
formed the center Of the signs OF the
zodiac, while the entire production
was marked as forwarded to Congress
as special message No. 232S2323@323."
The guests observed particularly
that the total eclipse of the year is due
In March, and will be viewed with in
terest by the United States, Africa and
Oyster Bay"
The inauguration of Henry Hall. cor
respondent of the Pittsburg Chronicle
| Telegraph. as president of the club. Of
forded the retiring president, James
Henry Of the Philadelphia Press, an op-
portunIty to give the new official some
instructions.
The new president took the oath
with his left arm raised and two fin
gers crossed. swearing that he would
keep the Ananias club In flourishing
condition. ride ninety-eight miles
day and keep Congress on its reserva-
tion.
When Jewell ii. Aubrere. correspond
ent of the ST. Louis Globe.Democrat,
made his appearance for initiation, he
produced an invitation from the presl-
dent of the Ananlas club. He was told
OF his mistake, but he insisted that the
room was packed with members of the
| Ananias club
The dinner was well advanced when
the lights suddenly went out. Amid
darkness and TO the accompaniment of
n weird piano air. there was n shut
fle of feet and In rhythm came n sibl-
! liant and mysterious 'sh.sh.sh." The
secret service sleuths were approach.
ing. One of their number. Blinkerton.
explained that the slcuths We're trying
TO find out what congressman did with
their 81 800 year. Finally the squad
ron separated, one goimg out TO pro-
tect the letter boxes TO keep Senator
Tillman from franking n grand piano"
Announcement was made that the
! House committee on ways and means
was In session TO hear evidence con
eerning the tariff and God save the
United States" added the herald.
The climax OF Andrew Carncgle's
testimony came when he demanded to
/ know what reason there was for tar.
III ON steel. now that he had gone out
OF the business.
The music. us attractive as usual.
reached it's elimination when n quar-
tette OF members told Vice President
Fairbanks In song that In the clubs
memory his tall form would ever
fondly live.
The chorus Joined In singing. to the
tune OF ION the Banks OF the Wa.
BASH:
"oh. the cocktails they are growing in
the morning,
And the buttermilk Is flowing
through the hay;
They are waiting the return OF Fair.
banks.
On the banks OF the Wabash. far
away
As they departed. n messenger boy
handed President Hall n cablcgram. II
read;
THE 'Possum Am Very, Very Fine.
WILLIAM II. TAFT"