davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1909-03-07

An UP to date suburban barber shop and
rlgar store doing $40 per week business;
laundry agency; Koken chairs. quarter
sawed oak fixtures; catering to "a swell class
of trade: rent $50. Take II at $780,,
STANDARD BUSINESS AGENCY.
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1909-03-07

sS5O-MovING PICTURE SHOW. nearby
city of 10000 Inhabitants; exceptional loca-
ton; doing paying business; all modern APP
pliances stage and paraphernalia for vaude-
Vile; low rent; good lease, thorough inves-
tigation will convince you of its earning
ability for reasons Of sale and terms see
IEAI1Y a. SON.
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1909-03-07

81 rooms; elegantly furnished: plano, hot
and cold water in all the rooms: best loca-
tion In the city. This is a rare opportunity;
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1909-03-07

Builds y story house. six rooms mod
ern plumbing, hardwood floors, large
porches and large rooms.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
TANNING A BIRD.
Teaching q Feathersd Pet to Trust
You % Not Difficult.

Teaching . Feathsrsd Pet to Trust
You 10 Not Difficult.
No creature is more jealous or sensi.
i've than bird. 1t is easy. however,
to win the heart of almost any bird.
and that without starving him or maxi
ing him think he has mastered you.
Simply talk to him a good deal.
Place his cage near You on your desk
or work table. and retain his choicest
dainty to give to him with your own
fingers. Let him know that he can
never have that particular thing unless
be takes 1t from You. and he will soon
learn. II you are patient and do not
disconcert him by fixing your eyes
upon him.
After this he will more readily take
It from your lips. and then when you
let him out Of his cage. after the first
excitement IS over, he will come to you.
especially If you have a call to which
you have accustomed him. and accept
the dainty from you while free.
As soon as he becomes really con-
vinced that you will not hurt him or
try to catch him or interfere in any
way with his liberty he will give way
to his boundless curiosity about you.
He will pull your hair. pick at your
eyes and give You as much of his COM
pany as you desire.-New York Press.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
The Wall Street Game.

The burning question on Wall street
- always whether stocks will go up or
down. lf any man were able to an
swer II correctly he could make him
self a millionaire in a doo. but specu-
lation Is neither fortune telling nor o
gambling game. and the man who be-
heves otherwise IL bound to lose his
money and to join the ranks of the dis
consulate. disgusted and depleted who
make the Outcry against the evils Of
Wall street. says Leslie's Weekly.
The winner in Wall street n gifted
with the same business characteristics
that bring success In any line of enter
prise. He utilizes them in buying and
selling stocks. just as he would II he
were engaged In merchandising He
knows. for instance. that prosperous
conditions are reflected by what are
called the bank exchanges. by railway
earnings. the record Of failures. the
condition Of the iron market. the bal.
anee Of trade and especially the out
look for the crops.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
LOVE- FOR TITLES.


shs Way ths Average German Burger
IeHstjeens ttis Name.
The average German burgher's love
Of titles II q source Of never ending
fun to the rest Of the German popula-
don and Of continual ridicule to the
rest Of the world. Any one caring to
ZEE how far some people Of the father
land viii 60 In this direction need only
have look at q hotel register at q
summer resort. He win see added
to the name Of the guest the most
curious combinations Of appellations
drawn together to form title. He
win, for instance. find:
A 'Technischen Provfnzialfeuersozie-
tatsinspector'' Il technical provincial
IRE Insurance inspector,.
A ''Geheimen Expedierenden Sekre.
tar i'm Ministerium der Ofrentlichen Ar
beiten" (meaning special sort Of Sec
retary at the ministry Of public works,.
Alto continue In English as well as
possible cashier president of the
Royal Saxon railway" royal rail.
road subsecretary."
The ladies are not better. Frau
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES" is
quite usual and means "Mrs. Widowed
Supertax Collector" Then there are
the Mrs. Secretary and Calculator"
and "Mrs. Widowed General Agent." :"
The best Of all. however. is a title
which lady entered in the register Of
q hotel at which I recently stayed. 1t
read. "Mrs. Prison Warder and Chill.
dren."-Pall Mall Gazette.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
flao Proportions,

ray VGOpOISsOUSs
In the United States dag the width
Of a stripe is invariably half the length
in inches of the flag's longest measure
ment For example. in dag ten feet
long the stripes should be i've inches
wide. Accordingly the dag would have
a width Of Eve feet five inches. or thir-
teen times Eve inches. The feE
should be Of navy blue bunting meas
uring seven stripes deep and extending
two-fifths across the length Of the dag.
There should be forty-six stars on the
field. arranged in six rows. beginning
with eight. the two middle rows hav-
ing eight and the last row eight and
the other rows seven. The size of the
star at its widest measurement should
be such that one-half of its own width
will separate it from the next star.
Flags may be made in all sizes, but
the above proportions should be pre-
served.-Philadelphia Press.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
THEIR own DOCTORS.
Remedies That Animals When Sick
Dnstinetivoly 8eloet.

Remedies That Animals When Sick
lnstinetivsly ssleet.
With the brute creation the simple
remedies Of nature generally sufnce
for their few ailments. and they are
guided to them by instinct. We have
been told how the mongoOse cures him.
self when bitten by q cobra by eating
q certain plant. and many country res
dents have seen sick dog bury him.
self in the dirt.
Animals instinctively choose such
food as IS best suited to them. A large
number of animals wash themselves
and bathe. as elephants. stays. birds
and ants. In fact. man may take
lesson in hygiene from the lower an
finals. Animals get rid of their para
sites by using dust. mud. clay. etc.
Those suffering from fever restrict
their diet. keep quiet seek darkness
and airy places. drink water and some
times even plunge into it.
When a dog has lost his appetite he
eats that species of grass known as
dogs grass (chiendent). Cats also eat
grass. catnip. etc. Sheep and cows
when i'll seek out certain herbs. An
animal suffering from chronic rheu-
matism always keeps as much rs pos
sible in the sun. The warrior ants
have regularly organized ambulances.
Latrelle cut the antennae of an ant.
and other ants came and covered the
wounded part with transparent fluid
they secrete in their mouths. Ii
chimpanzee be wounded it stops the
bleeding by placing its hand on the
wound or dressing it with leaves and
grass. When an animal has wound
ed leg or arm hanging on IT completes
the amputation by means of its teeth.
Philadelphia North American.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Paris has cat exchange. 'bourse
aux chats" This establishment IS situ-
ated In big chamber at the rear Of q
wineshop. here are legions of cats Of
all sizes and colors, which are to be
seen jumping and heard ''miaulant."
1t is said that the customers are by no
means tender hearted old ladies'. but
for the most part furriers. glovemak-
efs and cooks. A good sleek ''matou''
realizes from 21s cents to 20 cents. The
skin has a number of usages. and the
6esh, according to the story. finds its
way into the stewpans Of certain res
taurants possessing more enterprise
than scruple.-Chicago Journal
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
alovvino up the Locks,

Would it be easy to blow up and de-
stroy a lock canal by the malicious use
Of dynamite or other high explosive?
The question has been debated much
in connection with the Panama canal.
The Engineering News calls attention
to the fact that an attempt made In
1900 to wreck the Welland canal in
this way produced surprisingly small
results. After two weeks examination
the two men concerned selected lock
"A, and each lowered satchel con-
tanning dynamite and a fuss to the
water behind the gate at each end OF
the lock. Both charges were exploded,
but the dynamite failed to carry away
the gates. Although the explosives
blew q hole about foot in diameter
through each gate and loOsened the
hinges. the gates remained in position,
holding back the water.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
HER CHOICE OF B0AS.
The Question That 70 Now Puxzling the
Man In the Case.

The Question That 10 Now Puxzlins the
Man In the cass.
Crosby had always been inclined to
conservatism in household expenses,
especially in the matter Of his wife's
dress bills. His wife went 50 far as
to say that he was penurious.
She had been in need of new boa
for long time. and after she hinted
that her happiness would never be
quite complete till she had one be at
last consented to make the purchase.
He went into store and picked out
two, one of which was cheap imita-
don affair and the other fine. expen-
sive one.
Taking them to his Office before 60
ing home. he changed the price marks,
the expensive tag on the cheap boa.
and vice versa.
His wife examined them for a long
time very seriously indeed and then
said: ':Now, dear. the expensive boa Is
beauty, and it is really very good Of
you to allow me my choice. Some
women would take It without a word.
but really don't think we can afford
the more costly one, and besides, dear.
I think the cheap one the more stylish
too. Why. Cros, dear, what's the mat
ter? Are you il?'
But dear old Cros had made his get
away into the night where he could
kick himself as hard as he felt he de-
served. But what he would like to
know is this: Did h> wife happen on
the more expensive boa by pure acci-
dent Or
New York Tribune.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Dt Came Back.

John Burroughs. the naturalist.
dined with me one night" said q mag
azine editor of New YORK. and among
my guests was young nature writer
Of the new school.
This young man told q wonderful
story about the intelligence Of oysters.
he said he was going to put the story
In bis new book. Mr.. Burroughs gave
q dry laugh and said:
Let me tell you about q cat. This
story Is quite as authentic a. the other
one. and it should do for your book
nicely
The venerable student paused im-
pressively. then said:
"A Springfield couple had q cat
that age had rendered helpless. and
they put It out Of its misery by means
Of chloroform. They buried 1t In the
garden and planted q rosebush over
Its remains. The next morning a IA
miliar scratching took them to the
front door. and there was that cat
waiting to be let in, with the rose
bush under its ARM"
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Curious Village Names.

There Is in Dorset a group of villages
which in some form or other have as
their eponym the stream in whose val
ley they are situated. The stream Is
named Puddle, and the villages bear
the names of Puddle Hinton. Puddle
town. Tulpuddle. Affpuddle, Turner'S
Puddle and Bryan's Puddle. One Is
reminded of the riddle about the letter
m" Some. like Queen Mary. have
It BEFORE" some. like King William.
have 1t behind" Poor things. poor
things: The Inhabitants of these VII
lages,' says Marcus Dimsdale. who
writes in the Cornhill Magazine ON
English Village Names" ''sent to a
former postmaster general-if 1 am
rightly Informed. Cecil Raikes-a re-
quest that they might be allowed to
change their names and replace them
with more euphonious substitutes
which they obligingly supplied. Back
came the official reply. curt. overbear-
ing. 4 cable. Puddle you are, and
puddl must remain!"
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Clearly Understood.

They seldom gave dinner parties,
and those they gave were small. But
they liked things done decently and in
order and generally had the best. On
the afternoon of one of the little par-
tes the host summoned the boy in
buttons and said to him, "Now. John,
you must be careful how you hand
round the wine."
Yes, sir"
These bottles with the black seals
are the best and these with the red
seals the inferior sherry. The best
sherry is for after dinner. The infe-
rior sherry you will hand around with
the hook after soup. You understand
hook and inferior sherry after soup?'
Yes. sir; perfectly" responded the
boy In buttons.
The evening came and with it the
guests. Everything went on SWIM
mingly till the boy went round the Ia
bic asking each Of the guests. Hook
q inferior sherry?"-London Tit-Bits.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Two spiders who dweit in different
parts of church CHANGED to meet to-
Eether in the aisle one day when ort
for q constitutional.
How are you getting on:" said spi-
der No. ! to spider No. g
''Oh. moderately" was the reply. Il
don't feel very comfortable on Sun
days. I live in the pulpit under the
cushion. and on that day the parson
comes and bangs the book and sends
his fists on the side. and I have to
keep very close or else some day 1
think he'll hit me. He bangs with
such q force that know he'll squash
me to jelly"
"Oh. you come and live with me-
sald his companion. I'm never trou.
bled I'm always comfortable and nev-
er disturbed from one years end to the
other"
''lndeed-' said the other spider
"And where do you Eve?'
'-Oh. I live In the pOOrboxr' was the
reply.-Pearson's Weekly.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Women in their ambition to be ath-
letic contend against innumerable diff.
dculties. One Of these difficulties Is
skirts. second is waists and third
almost insuperable-is hair. including
hairpins. Watch q girl playing tennis
or cricket, and after a more than usual.
Iy brilliant effort she invariably puts
her hands to her head. as II she ex-
pected something to fall Oh II she did
not. Energetic play is usually attend
ed by dishevelment Of the unruly locks
and shedding Of hairpins that cause
the pretty athlete distress. Her pleas
ure in the game is marred by q sense
Of insecurity and constant fear Of
consequences. No woman can WELD 4
racket or essay q run with an un-
divided mind. Half her brain IS oc-
cupied BY the fearful srmise that her
hair is coming down-a surmise. by the
way, which is probably too painfully
justified BY the fact-London Black
and White.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
A Tempest In . Teapot.
7hat war was caused by a clay tea.

~ uOUuPOOS uU UVOVVSs
What war was caused by clay tea.
pot?
For an answer to this question we
must 60. as might be supposed. to the
land of pigtails and porcelain. The
story goes that q Chinese emperor In
olden days gave as mark Of special
favor a magnificent clay teapot Of rare
design to Lo Hung Chang. his favorite
mandarin. This was laid up as a price
less possession among the treasures Of
Lo Hung or borne at his side by two
attendants at all high public festivals
and functions. A rival mandarin saw
these signs Of distinction with the
green eyes Of jealousy and hired
man to break the obnoxious pot. The
clumsy fellow was caught In the act
and betrayed bis master. War follow
ed between the two mandartns and
their respective followers. which re-
suited In the overthrow and death of
Lo Hung Chang and the reception OF
his rival into royal favor In his place.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Route No. 1.
Wurdeman Bros. were on tho market
Lest Friday with car Of hogs.
Very few of the farmers on this route
have finished their corn husking.
Last Thursdsy the carrier was able
70 make his first complete trip since tho
storm, owing to the bad roads.
Complaint was made to Us last Thurs-
day by one Of our young lady patrons to
tho effect that on Friday, December 8.
someone of an inquisitive deposition
opened one OF her letters that had been
left in tho mail box by the carrier. She
says sha would gladly allow them to
read oil Of her letters. il they will call
ct her home. and will also show them
her post card album, which We dare say,
10 very nice one. But she says she
would prefer to be the first ono TO open
her own letters
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
A Lost Opportunity.

The father of the late Benoit Con.
slant Coquelin. the great French actor.
was baker. and young Coquelin was
brought up to the trade. At thirteen,
q writer in Le Figaro says. he mani
tested an irresistible inclination toward
the stage. an inclination which his fa-
ther steadfastly strove to repress.
Don't devote so much time to those
Dramas" his father used to say. You
have learned a good trade. the business
is running we'll. and you shall be my
successor
A number of years after Constant
had made his way into general favor
his father. who took pride in his boys
success. but could never quite get over
the feeling that Constant should have
been a baker. was congratulated upon
his sons eminence.
Il remember" said the old man.
that Constant was a good baker. He
would have gone far in the trade"
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Modest Greatness.

Reporter-SenatCr. to what do you
chiefly attribute your Successful ca
reer? Eminent Statesman Entirely to
6eredtty. young man. ! deserve no
credit for II whatever. My father had
ambition. and NY mother had talent.
and happened to inherit both those
qualifications. Chicago Tribune
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
hts and Wheat as "sssds."


schS children in the crowded part
of New York do not speak Of corn and
oats and wheat by those names. but al
ways refer to them as seeds" The
other day in one of the big schools the
teacher was talking to her pupils about
gardening. She ended with 4 request
for each pupil to bring a few seeds the
next day to be planted in the window
boxes. The following morning the chill
dren appeared mostly with either oats.
wheat or corn. While putting a few
grains of each in the earth the teacher
referred to them by their familiar
names. One Of the girls In the class
took courage to ''set the teacher right
and said: Some one must "a told you
wrong, teacher. That" pointing to the
wheat, rs bread seed. an that yellow
stuff amt corn: it's pigeon seed. We
always call them that in the block
where we nve."-New York Sun.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
In the Regular Establishment.

W SU0 Ne0Os1T NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
YES" said the fresh young lieute1.
ant, the army has fallen on evil
days"
The sophisticated captain merely
gasped.
Why" the +. Y. L. went on. look
at the names on this roll-Private En-
trance. Corporal Punishment, Major
Domo. General Housework. What
kind Of a.
But Just then the s. C. SHE'D a-a-
well. ginger ale bottle at the fleeing
offender.-Lippincott
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Shell Scujptors.


The workman manipulated the comb
Of pale. translucent tortoise she'll like
putty. molding the top with bis in-
gers into small balls.
"You thought we carved shell. hey?'
he said. with an Italian accent. mo,
no. We heat It up and mold 1t. We
are shell sculptors."
he took three pieces Of shell from q
pot Of steaming water and laid them
very carefully. one on top Of the other.
In q press.
''Shell IS like glue" he said. "These
three pieces will weld together. and
not sign Of seam will show. Sohe-
times We weld nine. four. twenty pieces
together. I learned my trade In Ma
pies. I don't want to boast. but We
Neapolitans are the best workers In
shell and coral that there are in the
world" d."-Philadelphia Bulletin.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Irritated Citizen-Aren't you asham-
d Of yourself. going about with that
street organ and leading soch lazy
liSe? Street Organist-Lazy life? Why.
cir, life with me is one long daily
grind.-Eeho. .--s
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
The Poets Woe.

u have always been render ~,
your poetry" began Mrs. Gusbp.
II am glad replied AIgernon
Charles Mystic. that some one under
stands me-
"Oh. but that is what ! have been
hoping to meet you for ! wanted you
to exp)aiD."-Philadeiphia North Amer
lean.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
tntrinsically.

Constituent-What do you suppose
Eraphter is worth: Senator LotsmuE
Il don't know what he's worth now
bought him once when be was just
starting out for SIS and a railway
2ass.-Chicago Tribune.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
RouQh Passage.

Il hope and pray" remarked q gen.
tleman as he left the steamer. that l
shall never have occasion to cross the
Atlantic again."
Rough passage. eh:" queried
friend.
Rough is no name for 1t. I had
four kings beat three times."-New
York Sun.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

One housewife declares that nj las,
she has solved the servant problem
Formerly ! bad untold trouble with
my maids" she said. They'd do well
for awhile. and then they'd deteriorate
so that I simply couldn't keep them.
So ! hit on this plan: When I noticed
q falling o6 iD the hast maids work
l went into the kitchen and told her
that. in addition to her 6xed wages,
she should have 50 cents extra every
week that she did well. When she
was only fairly good I'd give her q
quarter. but 90 the weeks when she
me she'd get nothing. Nine
weeks out Of ten she gets ber half dol
lar. 1t pleases her immensely. and I
6nd the plan well worth while in the
better service Il secures me."-NeW
York Tribune.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
.Ascuta Child.

Every time the baby looks into my
face be smiles" said Mr.. Meekins.
We'll" answered his wife. 1T may
not be exactly polite. but It shows be
has 4 sense Of humor."
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Monded His Manners.

A certain English officer is noted for
bis ready wit and quickness In rep.
artee. In the very early days Of his
career he was ordered to Bombay and
was attached to the staR Of the then
commander In chief as A. D. q.
Shortly after his arrival. at a func-
ton at the government house, q new
military secretary who. In the con-
scious pride of his new position. had
hearty contempt for subalterns Of all
degrees. with q CLASSY stare through
his eyegiass. offered him two fingers to
shake.
The A. d. c.. quite unabashed. look
ed at him for q moment or two and
then said genially:
Hang it all. major. the governor
gives me three"
The whole room was convulsed. and
the military secretary. now a colonel.
pr0fited by the hint and mended his
manners. but he never forgave the A:
D. C.-L0ndOn Tit-Bits.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15
Card of Thanks.

Gard of Thanks.
We wish to thank the many friends
for their acts Of kindness and sympathy
during the last illness and death OF our
infant son.
Mr.. AND MRS F. J. GRRHARZ.
The Columbus journal., 1909-12-15

Doubt is born of the mind: faith q
the daughter Of the soul.-Emerson
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1909-11-04
Back Numbers.

"William," said Mrs. Van Geldcr to the man of all work, ''l want you to clean out that large closet in the ball just outside the parlor. Burn all the old newspapers. waste paper and any other rubbish you may lind there"
 After q short time she met Willia nj in the hall carrying in his arms a huge pile of sheet music. the property of her eldest daughter.
 ''What are you going to do with Ma. bels music:" she asked.
 "Why, burn it. sure, as you told me to It was in the closet there with the other rubbish.'
 ''But didn't mean the music. Put it back at once"
 Noting his mistress dlsplcasure. Will liam inquired in surprise:
 "Why, hasn't she played it all:"