Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1909-04-28
Her Stratagen
Aunt Jane Was a Chaperon
Without an Equal.


at all like those blessed women who,
for their virtues and manifold charms,
have been crowned with the care-free
diadem of Joy and independence. All,
no! Aunt Jane was spinster, sour as
vinegar.
Euphonia was the niece of Aunt
Jane. But, o, what difference!
Euphonia was as sweet and as pure
as the dew upon the rose.
Such were they, sitting in the par
Tor Eyes, yes; in the parlor) when the
doorbell rang.
'T'll CO." said Euphonia.
mo-" said Aunt Jane, 'I'll go!"
And as she disappeared, Euphonia
quickly drew letter from her bosom,
glanced it over quickly and hid it in
her belt as Aunt Jane reappeared,
with the majestic bearing of an exc
cutioner, while behind her followed
John. And as for John, let it simply
be said that when the girls are gifted
with noses like candy there is gen.
orally young man not far away with
! most decided liking for sweets. And
as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane sat down
on the sofa with something of a
bounce, and as her chin curled up and
her nose curled down, she seemed to
say, eyes, here l am, and here l am
going to stay!"
"How do you do?" said John.
"How do you do?" said Euphonia.
And ,''How do you do?" said John.
And "How do you do?" said Eu-
phonia.
And still again, "How do you do?"
said John.
And vet once more, "How do you
do?" said Euphonia.
And as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane
looked troubled between her brows
and tilted her head a little more on
, one side as she watched the two with
an air that said: "Now, that's funny!
Now that's very funnyi"
'Have you been well?" said John.
EYES," said Euphonia, looking down
at the carpet.
you're sure?" said John.
Eyes," said Euphonia, but you could
barely hear her.
"And you always will?" said John.
CT think So" said Euphonia
And as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane
began to suffer.
''Have you been well ?" said Eupho-
mia, looking up and looking down
again.
"You bet / havei" cried John.
you're sure?'
Absolutely! Positively"
''You look WE'LL
"Ah!" cried John.
"And you-you always will?"
"You know l will" he reproached
her.
And as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane
laid her right ear on her right shout
der and her glance shifted backward
and forward between the confection-
cry and the hungry boy like a shut
tie in the loom.
Euphonia and John sat down, and
John, with a world of deliberation,
placed his little finger between his
teeth and bit it.
Lovely weather. said.
Euphonia arose from the sleepy hol-
low chair and sat down in the gilt
chair.
Yes said she.
John bit his little finger again.
did the cat come back? ?" he asked.
Euphonia changed back to the
sleepy hollow.
eyes," said she.
John bit his little finger.
"They always do" said he.
EIInbonio n 4,,y,o
and carelessly went over to the sofa
and sat down by the side of Aunt
Jane.
YES said she.
And as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane
almost screamed with the pain, but
just at that point John bit his little
finger again, and as Euphonia arose
to go back to the sleepy hollow that
letter slipped out of her belt and
dropped on the sofa. Aunt Jane picked
it UP unnoticed, glanced at the open
ing lines and set her jaw.
John tapped his foot on the carpet.
Euphonia tapped her foot
John tapped his foot.
Euphonia tapped her foot.
And as for Aunt Jane, she went
out of there. She stopped beneath the
gas jet in the hall, though, and
opened the letter.
Dear Euphonia Gead the letter.: AS
A suppose Aunt Jane will be there as
usual, have made up a few signals
which we will use.
How do you do?' means: Glow I
love your
'Have you been well?" means ''Do you
love me?"
Biting the little finger means: 'cI shall
love you foreverr'
Changing from one chair to another
means: 'I shall love you forever, tool"
And tapping the foot on the floor
means: ct wish Aunt Jane would chase
herself for a minute"
Yours despairingly, JOHN.
And as for Aunt Jane, Aunt Jane
chased herself right back again, and