davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
QUAKER NEGOTIATIONS.

from the Philadelphia Record.J
Few of US ever get old enough to
know better.
Even fat man may be quite sue
cessful at lodging an issue.
When an artist goes to a prize fight
it always results in a draw.
Fortune never smiles on a man who
stares her out of countenance.
The man who gets to the top does
MT always wait for the elevator.
Nell-"What a fresh complexion
she has" Belle-"Yes, fresh every
morning"
The only noise some men make in
the world comes from their exploded
theories.
The man who has never had any
disappointments isn't in a position to
appreciate good luck.
Love will find a way" quoted the
Wise Guy. Yes, even though it may
be only way out" added the Simple
Mug.
When we do meet a man whose
head hasn't been turned by success
we conclude that he must have stiff
neck.
wigg-"The Widow Dashaway
doesn't let the grass grow under her
feet wagg-"Of course. not. She's
grass widow"
Blobbs-"A man is naturally ad
dicted to more crooked work than a
woman" S1obbs-"Huh Did you
ever see a woman drive nall"
Hook-'I never knew such liar
as that fellow Longbow. Nye-"I
guess that's right. He can't even drop
a hint without breaking his word"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

minimum by passing stringent rules
and regulations regarding the sale of
especially dangerous contraptions for
the making Of noise. This may strike
some folks as being bit of unpatriotic
sentiment but it is not. 1t is common
sense. There are plenty of ways to
fittingiy celebrate the occasion without
permitting the boys and girls to take
the chances of ending their lives or in
Turing themselves most seriously. That
a safe and sane Fourth OF July is al
most a necessity is made apparent by a
brief but illuminating article on the
subject by William Orr, which is print
ed in the June Atlantic as follows:
1t is evident from the comments of
the press on the present evils of our
Fourth of July that there is urgent
need of definite control and wise di-
rection of the popular use of the holi-
day. The roll Of dead and wounded
for the last ten years, as compiled by
the Chicago Tribune, is eloquent in it's
warning. The figures tell their own
story of an insensate and reckless
a 11Sa IF he DAYS r1r-irileraS.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
AYHAWKER JOTS

Comfortable circumstances" is a
comparative phrase thinks the Wichita
Beacon as it may mean anything from
two pairs of trousers to a hundred
thousand dollars.
A Winfield preacher is accused of
handing in a notice to the Free Press
office in which the word "baccalaure-
ate' was written "backalaraat." May
be he's a simplified spelling enthusiast.
The Salina Journal says that thanks
are given to the three lola people who
committed suicide in the month just
passed, for waiting until after the as
SCISSOR counted them into the popula-
ton statistics.
Bishop Quayle thinks Mr.. Roosevelt
ought not to hunt on the Sabbath. But
if a rhinoceros was chasing the bishop
on Sunday and he had gun. he would
probably shoot in self defense, says the
Wichita Beacon.
Well drillers claim to have found
quicksilver near Ellinwood. Some of
the people believe there is a deposit of
the stuff where the we'll is being drilled
some of their silver in trying to get
rich with quicksilver mine.-Wichita
Eagle.
William Allen White tells of the
meal of his life that he got in a little
Spanish town, and says that the Span
iards can cook rings around the Ameri-
cans. Which seems to show that Will
liam has just taken an appetizer; prob
ably in the form of a three mile run
or climb over a Spanish peak.-Law-
renee Gazette.
Thfrty-five years ago this week the
Courier received from the Fort Scott
Iron foundry double galley proof
press. 1t is still doing good service in
the Courier's composing room. An
other event OF that time was the we'd
ding of Miss Emma LeffingWell and
| Mr.. John Swain, who were prominent
| in the Winfield of that day and still
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
JOURNAL ENTRIES

1t may take two to make a quarrel
but one is enough to begin it.
y y y
One route to happiness is to learn
to forget all troublesome things-ex-
cept debts.
\ X
A jack of all trades may be master
of none but he's a mighty handy In
dividual to have around.
= r 4
This much is certain. Tramps will
not have much of a chance to steal
rides on airships when they become
common carriers.
The man who is ever harping on
the fact that he wants a square deal
in all things is usually looking for a
shade the best of every bargain.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
HUAOR or THE Day

And how is that pretty young widow
hs s. fds mrs; Set BroWns Is she reconciIed to
prop. she amt exactly reconci i vet.
out."-Catholic Standard and Times
Come over and see me- Sorry. old
man. man.. but have =, an engagsment with my
getting "a s swen!s CouISni br out %
is in the courtroom. sHcleveiand Le es er'e
why do women wear such large hats?"
1t is necessary. If fashion says that hats
must be large, then hats must be large
Suppose fashion should decree that shoes
must be large?"-Kansas City journal.
Hannibal. the illustrious general. driven
to despair by his enemies, had taken poison
and had laid himself down to die. Amy
how he said. my name will live in his
thousand years later town in Missouri
was named in his honor.-Chicago Trib-
une.
Proprietor What's become of the Post
No Bills sign that was on our fence? jan
itor-Someone tore it off and stuck 1t up
over the mallpox, sir.-Boston Transcript.
.Joan--I'rn awful frightened at the light
MIN. wish there was man here. Mis-
| tress-What good would that do? joan
| He'd tell me not to be such fooL-Punch.
HAS he proposed yet?' Not in so
many Words That's no answer Pro-
posals never do come in words-they con-
sist of signs, hens, haws and gurgles. -
Cleveland Leader
Il understand you spent a quiet evening
with your wife last night" Moo, a man
might spend quiet evening with a phono-
graph or a mechanical piano, but hardly
with his wife. Houston Post.
The Lawyer-Madanl, what is your age?
The Opposition dnterupting)-Your Hon
or, submit that my honorable opponent
is melting the witness to perjury!-Cieve-
land Leader.
"What sort of people live in the Bal
kans?'' asked the girl who seeks informa-
tion- II don't know" answered Miss Cay
enne. Judging by the frequency with
which they schedule fights that do not
happen should think they might be pro-
fessional pugilists- '-Washington Star.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe.

IFrom the Atchison Globe.
He is too new a widower to suit
me-" an old maid remarked of an
Atchison man who called on her re-
Gently, with serious intentions. He
smells of embalming fluid"
So many women are being operated
upon here of late that we expect to
hear this criticism of a woman who
isn't always tidy: .She is always go
ing around with some of her stitches
united
If you want to compliment a woman
with a grown family do not tell her
she is noted for being kind, faithful
patient mother. Tell her she looks
young enough to be the sister of her
children.
Learn to do a little thinking for
yourself; to make more frequently
the Missourian's demand to be shown,
and the result will be a saving in time
and money. And 1t might help in
alternating the harvest hand shortage.
The demand for home product is SO
great lately that il includes home
made girls There is nothing in the
world nicer than a homemade girl,
by-the-way. She is nicer than the
girl who has been finished abroad.
Dear Lord is the favorite prayer
of an Atchison spin, make me to
see every time I come to Thee with
complaints what my married brothers
and sisters have to put up with from
their children, that I may cease my
complaining, and be duly grateful
that Thou has seen At in Thy wisdom
to make a carefree Spin out of me-
Give the devil his due. The fly
may carry all sorts of germs on his
feet, but did you ever see how he tries
to get them off? No other living
thing wipes it's feet as much as the
fly. The boy who is taught to swat
the fly doesn't wipe his feet as often
in ten years as the fly will wipe his il
five Yf1ir1utkR
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

drew.
Hes got a relapse exclaimed
IL,el. Gone crazy like. Seeing
Inings. Saw French court ladv in
the woods yesterday But he got no
DR.. Snow broke. out into a mighty
SO you are the young gentleman? ''
he said. Let's see the picture?''
.t AnaTew. brought it sulkily forth, not
Its my niece, Dianthe Barrows,"
still laughing.
Andrew smiled. Diauthe,
How the name fitted her.
she was attending d fancy dress
lawn. party at Stratford. about six miles
up the river, on the other side. She
paddIed down in her canoe, and seeing
those pretty birch trees wandered into
the h, woods; hiding her canoe in the
oushes. she saw you, but you, of
course, did not see her. She knew that
she would probably show in the pic
ture, as she happened to peer out from
behind the trees Just as you snapped it,
Sne was dressed in a French costume
that used to be her great great aunt's
We had a good laugh last night when
she told US about it. We could imagine
what surprise it would be to the gen
tleman, whoever he might be, after the
picture was printed"
TT was said Andrew laughing
himself now
rs she staying with you here in
town."
The doctor smiled a little.
Yes, for the summer. At present
she is sitting outside in my buggy,
holding the llorse''
I'll come out and meet her., said
Andrew promptly. 'I always knew L d
marry girl named Dianthe. Copy
righted, 1909. by Associated Literary
Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
rFron the chicago News.I

TFrom the Chicago News-1
Don't expect the unexpected to
happen too often.
when in doubt. take day on and
mind your own business.
taIkative man seldom selects his
wife for his audience.
You may be able to fool yourself
but you can't fool the fool killer.
once in a great while an old maid
lives long enough to admit that she is,
Even in this land of the free the
real estate owner has to pay taxes on
IL.
A girl would rather paint her cheeks
than have red nose from a cold in
her head.
It takes a man with an extrAordin-
airy command of language to control
a talkatiye woman.
If a man shakes hands with the
president at a public reception, his
wife never ceases to boast of it.
The summer girl imagines she can't
keep cool unless she wears a shirt
waist that a blind man could see
through.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers of the State journal
away during the summer may have
the paper mailed regularly each day
TO any address at the rate of ten
cents a week or thirty cents a month
(by mail only.) Address changed as
often as desired. While out of town
the State Journal Will be to you like
daily letter from home.
Advance payment is requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
THE FoURTHs DEATH RECORD.

Fourth of July, date on which Is
commemorated one of the most glori-
Gus of events in the history of the
United States, the signing of the
Declaration of independence. viii soon
be here. With it will probably come as
usual terrible slaughter of the in
nocents, although many localities
have taken steps to make its celebra-
ton on the part of the youngsters with
their powder-crackers and fireworks a
safe and sane one. It is really becom-
ing a day to be dreaded as well as one
to be honored and there should be no
let up on the part OF municipalities to
reduce the dangers Of the day to u
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
REFLECTIONS OF a BACHELOR.

TF'rom the New York Press.1
You may respect man for the
enemies he makes, but you never
envy him.
A man gets so excited hunting for
a political job that he forgets it isn't
patriotism.
Next to saying you are jealous.
girl would rather have you tell her
she inspires you to noble things
The particular fun a woman gets
out of writing a letter is forgetting to
put in the thing she wrote for. so she
can write another.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

competition that is being provided by
other localities which are being de-
veloped with great steel and other
iron industries. From the repre-
hensible actions of the moneyed class
of Pittsburg in times past, nothing
but the doom of that towns SUI
prenaacy is due them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

If So-Wah-Ta. the full-blooded
Indian who is driving automobiles in
Chicago lives up to the meaning of
his name. Boy-Who- Missed His-Aim,
it will be a most fortunate thing for
the children and pedestrians of the
Windy city, whom he happens to get
on a Decline with his motor car.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Something of a juicy melon must
be in the way of a cutting and distri-
button In Southern Pacific railroad cir
cles. There has been an unusual
heavy buying of the stock of this road
in the stock exchanges during the past
few days. And the buying has been
done by. inside sources" That's nat
ural. The public that plays the stock
markets gets the lemons. Tho melons
are the peculiar and particular proper
ty of the insiders
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Senator Aldrich is getting peevish.
He objects to being interrupted by
other senators while making an ex-
PLANTATION of the tariff. This is but
natural It's a mighty tough job for
Mr.. Aldrich or any one else to make
a satisfactory explanation of the
tariff bill as it has been presented to
the senate
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

It has been little late in coming
but Mr.. Bryan has finally come out
with a round scoring of the Demo-
cratic congressman who have proven
false to the platform pledges of the
Democratic party in respect to tariff
legislation He urges prompt work
to select good men for the next. race.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Baseball at night. which is going
TO be tried out by the National league
team of Cincinnati. will be a grand
thing for the bleacherites. They GER
tainiy pay heavy penalties for the
privilege of watching a game when
the sun is broiling hot and the cut
ting winds are blowing.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Now if the postmaster of Wichita
was receiving a salary of 500 more
a year than the postmaster of To-
peka-but the conditions in this re-
spect happen to be exactly the re-
verse-Topeka's newspaper friends
in Wichita would probably comment
lengthily on such a fact as showing
that the Peerless Princess is superior
in all ways as a city to Topeka.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

The Chicago Record-Herald hits
the nail exactly on the head when it
says that Mr.. Aldrich regards any
kind of tariff information which is
.unfavorable to his argument as mis-
information, imDertinently offered.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

And the legislature forgot to make
an appropriation for the salary of the
Judge and the other officers of the
Second district in Wyandotte county.
The last legislature was certainly a
wonder in this regard. The things
1t provided for and then failed to
make available the money to main
tain them are innumerabIe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Lieutenant ShackIeton will devote
some of his leisure to hunting for
radium in the islands near the south
pole. If he doesn't have any better
luck than he and other explorers
have enjoyed in their hunts for both
the south and north poles. his bag
of the precious metal will not be of
unusually large proportions.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Surely the New Jersey man who
took his own life the other day was
more insane than the usual run of
suicides. over one thousand dollars
In cash was found on his person.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

1t occurs to the Chicago Tribune
that you cannot even buy lemonade
without paying tribute to at least
two of the trusts.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

According to the Boston Globe
anvils date back of history. But
that's no good excuse for the pre-
valance of the many "anvil choruses'
of to-day
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

The general traffic on the railroads
show a big gain during the past two
months. This is a sue index of a
returning prosperity
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

totals .....1,Sl6 1880 29,296
Surely the sorrow, suffering, and mu-
tilation here represented mock the
claim that our July 4, as at present OBJ
served, is in any sense q festai day.
Rather is it a day OF terror, anxiety,
and dread.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Henry C. Prick thinks that Pitts
burg, Pa, is doomed as an industrial
and steel center unless the moneyed
1aen in It get together to meet the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

That these statistics, gathered by
July s, are below the real totals is seen
from the fluctuations of the Journal of
the American Medical association,
made in August, when tetanus has had
tina III, dr, ifs dire r.rnrIr.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
KANSAS C0MNENT
TOO MANY FRESHMEN.

IN spite OF the persistent advertis-
~ tns when the big institutions of
sHer learning are doing, 1t is fact
ssnerahy admitted by educators that
une OF the chief difficulties in many
large western colleges is the enor-
nous size of the freshmen class
lation.
me high schools and secondary
scnoois OF the country are turning
out SO many graduates that the high
q institutions are straining every re-
source TO provide for the horde, and
are usually failing in the attempt. AT
kansas university. they have a
lresninan class of about 500; at Bak-
er ana Washburn the number is said
TO be about 200. Some of the big
schools have been obliged to resort to
uHuergFadudte teachers to handle
eneir vast numbers of freshmen. The
freshmen In some of these overgrown
coHege professor. Their work is con-
quoted by teachers of less ability than
tney nave been accustomed to in the
high schools.
Ihls condition is akin to that of
the youth of. IA or Is years who has
grown SO fast that his strength is de-
pieted. 1t takes him five or six years
20 round himself out. The remark
dDie Growth of some of the high in
stltutlons OF learning has been out of
proportion to the facilities of the
scnooI 10 care for the ever increasing
lnuitltude of pupils. There is not
enough money available to hire ex-
per1enced teachers and provide ade-
quate accommodations.
This condition tends to help the
smaller schools of the state, which
are able to give the freshman as much
attention and as good instruction as
it gives to its seniors. The thorough
iy trained college graduate is in
charge of the freshmen of the small
colleges, and it is in the smaller col
Iege, which has not outgrown its fin
ancial resources, that the young man
or young woman now has in many
cases, the best opportunity for de-
Veiopment.-Salina Journal.
THE JUST CHAUTAUQUA.
You may have imagined that the
Chautauoua managers have been Civ
ing the country too many reforn1ers
and reformed bandits on their pro.
gram, to the exclusion of the conser-
vative. Possibly this is true, but moi
wholly the fault of the management
The calamity howier usually need:
the money, and the muckraker de.
Ponds upon his business for his for.
tune, and 1t is natural for them tt
have good deal to say. But the
latest move of the Chautauqua circle
should remove all charges of ultra
radlcalism. An offer of tempting pro
portions has been made to Senator
Aldrich, to have him take to the ros
trum, and tell his side of the tariff
struggle. This disposition of fairness
on the part of the Chautauqua circl,
will appeal OF all those who forge
| that Aldrich would draw we'll, ana
prove a money-maker, for, in thi.
| commercial day. even the Uplift mus
| be cashed in. Aldrieh will hardly &C
cept, as he doesn't need the money
and is we'll advertised without lectur
| ing. He isn't particularly beloved O
| men, but he is wise enough to know
that his lectures might make it worse
l-Atchison Globe.a7
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
ADJUSTMENTS.

ADJUSTMENTS.
At the Grand.
Wednesday night-Mary Mannerinr.
AT the Air Dome.
Ionlght--Harvey Stock company ID
drama and vaudeville.
r..,u, AT the Novelty.
- ionisnt-Moving pictun to SID D. m.
Eor particulars. prices ana amusement
s s,s see announcements in this paper
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

Joan-Irn awful frightened at the light
MIN wish there was a man here. Mis-
tress-What good would that do? Joan
He'd tell me not to be such a fool-Punch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07
Says Tennessee Is Republican.


There is good reason to Think that
Tennessee will be in the list of sure
Republican states ere many more
campaigns go by said Hon. Newell
Sanders. of Chattanooga. at the STAFF
ford. Mr.. Sanders is prosperous
manufacturer and chairman of the
Republican state committee.
Bryan beat Taft in Tennessee by
only about 1900 votes. and deduct
ing for fraud. It is a fair conclusion
that Taft really got the majority.
Heretofore, all the election machinery
has been in the hands of the Demo-
Gratis and they have used their pow
err unscrupulously. Our new ballot
law, however, will put a stop to this
crookedness, for 1t will give the min
ority party a third of all the officers
of elections. and the fraudulent
counts and falsifications of returns
will no longer be feasible. Tennessee
is Republican now on any fair test.
and has been for years; but the ras-
cality tactics of the opposition have
been able to defeat the popular will"
Baltimore American
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

II understand you spent a quiet evening
with your wife last night" moo, a man
might spend quiet evening with a phoro-
graph or a mechanical piano, but hardly
with his wife. Houston Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

HAS he proposed yet?' Not in so
many Words That's no answer. Pro-
posals never do come in words-they con-
sist of signs, hens, haws and gurgles. -
Cleveland Leader.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

roprietor-what's become of the POST
No Bills, sign that was on our fence? jan
itor-Someone tore it off and stuck 1t up
over the mailbox, sir.-Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1909-06-07

The Lawyer-Madanl, what is your age?
The Opposition (interupting)-Your Hon
or, I submit that my honorable opponent
is melting the witness to perjuryi-Cieve-
land Leader.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1909-07-18
BOIL WEEVIL REMEDY.

The following clipping from an eX- change seems to have some merit in it. We would suggest that the farm CT give it trial and watch the re- suits for short time:
 Get torchlight tthe same as used by engineers) and set it in basin of kerosene and put in your cotton field on a stump or some thing two or three feet above the tops of the cotton. The weevil will go to the light at night and in flying around it they will singe their wings and fall into the oil If you will do this the boil weevil will disappear from your farm. One light to ten acres of land is sufficient.