davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
STUPENDOUS PRICE PLACED
ON LAKES TO GULF DITCH
Army Board Places Cost of Fourteen
Foot Channel From the Lakes to
the Gulf at $159,OOO,OOO.

WASHINGTON, D. c., June IA
One hundred and fifty millions in
money and about eighteen years Oh
labor will suffice to build a fourteen
foot ship camel from the lakes to the
gulf, according to report Whlch
reached congress recently from the
war department. 1t is estimated that
it will take $12S,60O,000 alone to con-
struct a fourteen foot channel from
st. Louis to the mouth of the Missis-
sippi.
After delivering this bit of interest
ing information the board of army en-
gineers proceeds to jump with all its
many feet on the scheme of a num-
Der of people to make channel from
the Gulf of Mexico to Chicago which
will guarantee salt water bottoms OF
deep draft safe passage without scrap
ing. An eight foot channel is deep
enough says the board and nine foot
channel would accommodate big
enough boats and all the commerce
that would seek the Mississippi for
generations to come.
Easy TO Dig Nine Foot Ditch.
A nine foot channel would be COM
paratively easy to build. A fourteen
foot channel would soak up many mil
lions of dollars and many thousands
of days in building, and would be
nuisance to keep open, the board de-
clares saying it would be too deep for
little ships and too shallow for big
ones. The board, however, says the
big channel can be built and tells how.
Seven different methods of building
the deeper channel are advanced in
the report of the special board which
cd CT or of
w. H. Bixby, Lieut. Col. c. Med:
Townsend, and Lieut.. Col. ]. G. War
rem, corps of engineers, United States
army, and Henry b. Richardson and
Homer b. Ritter of the Mississippi
river commission. The board of army
engineers for rivers and harbors and
Gen. William l.. Marshall, chief of en-
gineerS, discard six of these plans and
adopt the seventh. This plan pro-
vides a combined method of dredging
and Repatriation in the open river.
The other six methods, which pro-
vide for plain dredging, canalization
with movable dams, canalization with
fixed dams, lateral canals, reservoirs,
and repatriation mostly between St.
Louis and Cairo, they say, are out of
the question. The system of canals
with fixed dams, according to the re-
port of the survey board, would cause
to be flooded over thirty towns and
villages, 100000 acres of farm lands,
and over 220 miles of railroad
House Delyes Into Maps and Data.
The great mass of maps and data
was laid before the house by
Speaker Cannon and was delved into
by many congressman and other per-
sons from the middle west
Taking advantage of the wide scope
of the directions of congress- in which
the survey board is ordered to report
on the 'desirability" of a fourteen foot
! channel, and also to report whether
the traffic can be cared for in other
ways. the chief engineers, in submit
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
SIGNS ON THE WALLS.

In Spokane there is a saloonkeeper
named Jimmie Durkin. He has two
& saloons, and has just opened a
;rd. He has taken his sons into
,>artnership, and upon the occasion
of the opening of the third saloon he
wrote them letter about saloons
liquor and drinking.
For years and years Jimmie Durkin
standing behind the bar, has watched
the never-ending procession of custo-
mers.
He has seen tipplers and sots, young
boys and Old men, rich and poor. glad
and gloomy-all pass in review before
his bar.
He has learned a lot about booze
and lot about people. He has sum-
med up some of his experience in
notices which he has hung upon the
walls of his barrooms. When the new
saloon was opened Jimmy picked out
a set of signs for it. Not only that
the newspapers so that his customers
wives might read them. Here are a
few:
Don't buy booze if your children
need shoes; Jimmie don't need the
money"
Don't lean on the bar thinking il
will support you"
eff mems consciences were the ten
derest things about them, this would
be happy world"
1.-The trouble with Jimmie's medi-
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
FIVE UNIQUE DISEASES.

That indefatigab1e poser, Jack Lon
don, announces that he arrived in
Sydney, Australia, suffering from five
serious Affections" one of these af-
ELECTIONS. he says, requiring an opera
ton. had caused him great pain for
months at times compelling him to
navigate the "Snarl-' from cot on
deck.
Another one of these Affections was
contracted in the Solomon islands. he
says, but the world will be glad to
know that it has been cured.
From a third disease, malarial fever
he still suffers, although it seems to
be slowly leaving him, but alas, he
is still suffering from two serious
and mysterious maladies which he
does not name and the symptoms of
which he refrains from describing.
One of these, he says, the doctors
thoroughly understand, but it is a
mysterious disease for which there is
no known cure and about which the
specialists themselves are very pes
simistic.
This disease" he says using the
regal plural, is still with u.s."
The fifth disease. however, accord
ing to his letter, is the "most myster-
ious of ALI and is absolutely I'M
known" The biggest specialist in
Australia in this branch" he says,
"confesses that not only has he never
observed anything like this, but not a
line has been written about it by the
other observers. He was so hopelessy
at sea about it that he did not even
care to experiment on me, which l
would not have allowed him to do had
he so desired"
This, indeed, is alarming news, but
the worlds alarm will be tempered by
curiosity to know how there should
be a biggest specialist" in that
branch" when the disease, in the
study of which he was a specialist,
was unknown to science. London
owes it to the world to describe the
symptoms that it has never been
card of before, although It has Its
SPECIALISTS.
me expects. of course, that any
disease which would attack Jack Lon
don would be unique and mysterious
He is too heroic figure to be sub
ject to the ordinary diseases that af-
fict common mortals. The usual
could never happen to Jack London.
In any event, Jack London, with
his remaining diseases, has abandon
ed his voyage around the world in the
"Snark" and expects to be home in
a few months. 1t is hoped that on his
return he will submit to diagnosis by
a committee of physicians, so that his
numerous mysterious diseases may be
properly chronicled for the benefit OF
humanity.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
LIGHT ON DARK SUBJECT

In order to indicate the probability
of a prejudiced attitude of United
States senators toward the industries
of the country, by reason of personal
business interests or connections, in
the discussion and vote on the tariff
bill. the New York Evening Post has
made an investigation which is inter-
esting and important.
The record of each member of the
senate was gone into. Here's the way
the senate lines up on business and
professions, according to the Post:
Farmers, 10.
Merchants, A.
Corporation lawyers, 81.
Lawyers without special leanings,
40.
Bankers and holders of bank stocks,
81.
Manufacturers, II.
Holders of railway stock, 10.
Holders of industrial stocks. 26.
Holders of steamship interests, 6
Holders of mining interests, II.
. Holders of lumber interests, 9.
Connected with public utility cor
porations., s.
Owners of large tracts of land, o.
Rated as poor men, 10.
Rated as millionaires, at least %.
Indefinitely reported to have lean
ings toward corporations. 16.
This list clearly spells property
rights Read it and see if in it you
,..rl,t g.
We do not have to be told that the
U. S. senate grinds daily in the inter-
est of the special few, it is interesting
to know to what extent our "represen-
tatives'' favor themselves when they
are favoring the rich and powerful in
general.
The Post mentions 40 lawyers who
are without special leanings." We
believe that is misleading. The very
fact that they are the men of the
written law is an indication of their
leaning. for the bulk of written law
serves property rights as against hui
man rights. and the average lawyer
thinks that way. So, the 40 lawyers
may be safely added to the 81 cor
poration lawyers, the 81 bankers, the
% millionaires the merchants and
manufacturers and others in the list
who by the natural order of things
stand for property.
Ten men are rated as "poor." Per-
haps these 10 of the whole number,
being poor, will understand the article
appearing in this paper today in
which a reporter recites his experience
with the head of the beef trust, whom
the reporter asked. why are the
prices of meat so high?
Maybe these 10 poor" senators
know of the struggle of the average
poor man to keep his family in re-
spectacle circumstances with the
prices of life necessities higher than
ever before and wages about station
airy. Maybe these 10 poor" senators
realize what tariff revision upward
means to the majority of American
citizens. We know that some of them
do. They are, of course, a hopeless
minority.
The United States senate is indeed,
THE Millionaires Club"
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
MORMON BURNS HANDS
TO RESCUE A LADY
Woman Who CleanSeS Skirt With
Gasoline Finds That Elder Is
Prompt in Assistance.

There is a Mormon elder in town
with a pair of badly burned hands.
There is also a woman in town who is
probably glad he has them, however
sorry she may feel for the pain he is
suffering. The story of how the elder
got his burns will reveal to those
who think him to be wrong in his re-
ligious belief that he is all right when
it comes to prompt action and self
sacrifice.
The elder, who is a strapping and
good looking young man and with
considerable eloquence, lives on the
west side, in a boarding house. Last
evening the lady of the house was
cleansing a skirt, which she was also
wearing at the time, with gasoline. In
some manner the gasoline ignited and
her danger became great. She
screamed and the follower of the faith
of Brigham Young Immediately came
to the rescue. His hands were his
only weapons, and he sacrificed them,
so far as immediate present use is
concerned. But he extinguished the
fire and saved the lady. His wounds
were dressed by DR.. Nywening.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
FRIENDS LOOK FOR WILLIAMS.
Left Home at Wapato Six Weeks Apo.
And Not Seen Since.

L. ID. W iliams, a pioneer of the
Yakima valley residing at Wapato has
been missing from his home since
May 1, and fears are entertained by
friends and relatives that he NAV
nave done himself some injury. On
the day of his disappearance he left
his home after a slight disagreement
His absence for couple of days from
home was not noticed as he was often
away. and after few weeks absence
his wife and friends began a search
for him. A number of years ago Mr..
Williams suffered from an attack of
the grippe which affected him men
tally. He had been confined in the
asylum on three different occasions
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

or wages gets just so much for his
collar.
And when Armour, the belted-earl
of the jungle. raises the price of meat
the stockman gets no extra copper,
but the workman's stew is thinner.
Not only are there belted-earls TO
feed and their bank accounts to fat
ten, but there are diamond tiaras to
be bought for the wife and autos for
the son; there are the steam yachts
and the priceless paintings.
And then there is the college to
en1ow and the library to build the
church must have new pipe organ,
and the literary sycophant must be
fed. There must be wine suppers for
Reggie's chorus girl friends, and, of
course. the SNUG lawyer must have
his share; for are not his wits the
men-at-arms which hedge round the
belted-earl of trusts and safeguard
him from the mob, and those other
valiant men-at-arms, the senators and
public servants?
And when these are all fed, the
iaiihtl anu al tiSeth StlS his poI lioIi
And the portion is great or less as
trust-made prices make the dollar in
his envelope shrink or expand.
But his seat is not at the table, and
he gets only what is eft.
And he has to fight for it then, too;
to fight with the half-starved dog
the disemployed; for that part that
goes over the end of the table is just
so much less by whatever has been
given to charity by the master.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

name when a swat meant a run, the
Ellensburg Colts slapped the white
wash all over Colonel Payne's Tigers
Sunday afternoon by the score of 2
to 0. The largest crowd of the sea-
son witnessed the game, which was
as tragic as the death scene from
Uncle Toms Cabin" from the view
point of the local fans, who had
hoped for a victory. The result sent
200 fans back to Kittitas, hyster-
ical and full of slang expressions.
with visions of pennant floating be-
fore them.
Hitless and Luclxless.
The Tigers were hitless and luck
less, throughout the game. An even
break from the goddess of baseball
would have given them a chance, and
from start to finish Colonel Payne's
gang played a fast fielding game. A
couple of times with men on bases a
hit would have meant a run, but the
best the valiant defenders could get
out of their systems were puny flies
and feeble grounders, which were
easy outs.
Nice Pitching.
Both Nelson and Metcalfe pitched
good ball, with the Ellensburg man
having shade the best of the argu-
ment. Three fast double plays
around second base by shortstop Ma
guire and second baseman Growers
saved Nelson from a worse defeat.
Pitched Metcalfe of Ellensburg was
a puzzle to the locals, and not a
healthy, husky swat was gathered off
his delivery. He was a master work.
man on the job and pitched a re-
markable game. Nelson fielded his
position in great shape, having four
assists. Other Tigers distinguished
themselves to no purpose.
The feature of the game was the
one-handed stab of a hard hit ball in
center field which saved the day for
his team by fielder Dale. The catch
was the best ever pulled off on the
local grounds, and the young man
deserved the coin and cheers he re-
ceived for his good work. The score
of the tragedy is as follows:
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

cines: The patient is apt to take ar
overdose"
keeping the bartenders busy dom
hurt my feelings"
"Durkin's bottles are good when
they are full-that is more than you
can say about the fellow who gets full
emptying them"
'"The fellow who's wishing he had
1t will never catch up with the fellow
that's trying to get it,"
Buying a drink for a bartender is
like paying conductors fare
"a man that is looking for troub' e
can find it easier than the man that's
ing to borrow money
IF we had a looking glass that
gould reflect our past actions, we
would break it."
There is lots of chin music in front
of the bars in my three stores: The
best notes that I get from it 1 find in
my cash register
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
NOT MARRY TO EXCESS.
Mark Twain Tells Girl Graduates to
Be Temperate in Smoking, Etc.

BALTIMORE, Mr., June 14-Mark
Twain came to Baltimore TODAY to
talk to the girl graduates of St.
Timothys school.
Following Edward F. Martin of
New York, Twain said that as Mar
tin had advised them as to what they
should do he could only tell them
what they should not do.
There are three things, young
ladies, 1 advise you not to do. Don't
smoke-that is, don't smoke to ex-
cess l am 1874 years old, and I have
smoked only 70 years of that time.
Don't drink-that is, don't drink
to excess.
Don't marry-I mean, to excess"
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
Women Who Are Enyied.

Those attractive women who are
lovely in face, form and temper are
the envy of many, who misht be like
them. weak, sickly woman will be
nervous and irritable. Consultation Or
Kidney poisons show in pimples.
blotches, skin eruptions and a wretch
ed complexion. For all such, Electric
Bitters work wonders. They regulate
stomach Liver and Kidneys, purify
the blood; give strong nerves, bright
eyes, pure breath. smooth, velvety
skin, lovely complexion. Many charm
ing women owe their health and
beauty to them. soc at c. c. Cases.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

A contributor to the New York Sun
maintains that the old order of pre-
cedence among men is changing, and
that new estimate of distinction is
growing up in the public mind. He
offers the following classification of
the worlds leaders as suggesting the
scope of this changed classification:
First, men of great fortunes, leaders
of finance; second, kings, rulers,
statesmen; third, inventors. scientists;
fourth, sociologists, educators; fifth,
singers, musicians, actors; sixth, law
yers; seventh, artists; eighth, novel;
lists, editors nine, soldiers tenth, gen.
eral run of business men; eleventh,
the populace; twelfth. the clergy;
thirteenth, poets" This classification
will be regarded as erroneous in at
least one particular. The populace de-
serves no place in the list, unless it is
placed at the top. The populace is
running things at present, despite
opinions to the contrary; but the list
is concerned with distinctions and
these involve Municipalities, which
the populace does not possess. AS to
the other distinctions made, it may be
said that each class has at some time
or other represented leadership in the
worlds affairs. Not uncommonly the
clergy has led, but it is probably given
it's proper position, relatively, at the
present time. The soldier has at times
represented the strongest element but
he can not now be placed near the
top of the list. OF course, the dis
tinctions in this list apply only to the
men of today and not to the great
figures of history. Neither do they
apply to posterity's verdict.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

On the witness stand in Spokane,
Robert Strahorn said that he owns but
500 worth of stock in the North
Coast railroad and that the rest of the
stock belongs to a woman. And yet
the ownership has been kept a secret.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

Wright brothers, be it noted, only
stopped long enough to get the
medals, when they resumed their oc-
cupation of making airships and
dollars.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

To relieve constipation, clean out the
bowels, tone and strengthen the d.
gestive organs, put them in a natural
condition with HOLSTERS Rocky
Mountain Tea, the most reliable tonic
for thirty years. 35 cents, Tea or Tab
lets. Cases Drug Store.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

score Dy innings:
Ellensburg 81 0 0 0 0 o.
North Yakima 0 0 0 0 0 0 90
Summary: Two-base hit-Mit-
chell. Double play-Maguire to
Growers to Kohls. Struck out-By
Metcalf. 81 by Nelson, 2. Left on
bases Ellensburg, Z; North Yakima,
8. First base on errors-Ellensburg,
rs; North Yakima, 4. First base on
balls-Off Metcalf. 2; off Nelson, q
Wild pitch-By Metcalf, 1. Earned
runs-Ellensburg, 2. Stolen bases
Mcguire, Woods, 2; Brown, Duncan
Sacrifice Hits-Kohls, Brown. UNI
|pire-SandersOn
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

Bill had won her-pretty maid,
A June bride she is to be;
Her peachy-cream complexion will not
fade,
Because it's Rocky Mountain Tea
inlaid.
Cases Drug Store.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16

President Taft says the age of flight
is here Well believe it when we see
Taft flying without sagging down the
middle of the airship.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
Team Standing.

Because not a mothers son of them
could deliver a hit worthy of the
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
SHY ON HITS TIGERS LOSE

Big Crowd Sees Best Game of Sea-
son-Tigers Fast, But Hitless-
Dale Makes Great Catch.
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
WHAT GOES OVER THE END OF
THE TABLE.

There was one nice thing about
our horse stealing ancestors who lived
six or eight centuries ago-they were
frank.
Take it in Merrie England and OBJ
serve how the people ate.
At the head of a long table, in a
raftered room, sat the beltedearl. To
him the servants first brought all
the food and drink. and he took his
fill.
He passed the dishes down the table
90 his guest of noble blood at his
right and to his wife at his left-and
they ate their fill.
Next the dishes passed to the child
rem of the house; to the poet, the doc
tor. the lawyer, the scholar, the priest
and to others who lived by their wits
rather than by their hands; to the
classes who fed in idleness because
they BATTERED the belted-earl or pleas
ed his senses.
And after the intellectual parasites
had fed. the bowmen, spearsmen and
huntsmen might dip their fingers in
TO the now-cold dishes and sop the
gravy up with crusts; they, too, might
drink from the great flagons-drink
the liquor that stood just above the
bitter dregs.
And SO the table was full.
But below the table, upon the rush
strewn floor, We're the people who, in
the gentle language of the day, were
called 'clods." "yokels." clowns" and
"churls." All these people did was to
do the work. They raised the crops
and harvested them. They butchered
the beef and made the ale and wine.
And there on the floor they got
what was left after their noble master
and his family, friends and flatterers
and men-at-arms had had their fill.
What the man on the floor got was
governed by the state of the appe-
title of the upper classes"
And he fought with half-starved
dogs for the bones and crusts the last
soldier tossed among the rushes
Very frank hnt thar ona,.Sa
The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1909-06-16
Very frank but rather coarse.

Nowadays the man who does the
work Z" is his own master" He works
for wages and buys what he will. But
when Patten' the belted-earl of wheat
puts up prices, the farmer who raised
the wheat last year gets no share of
he increase, and the man who works
Los Angeles herald., 1909-08-11
HOUSE BURGLARS RETURN
FROM SUMMER VACATIONS
Several Small RobberIes Reported to
Police After Interval Of Several
Weeks of Safety

That the house burglars who infested
the residential districts a few weeks
ago and brought distraction to the
police department in it's endeavors to
break up the gang, have returned from
their summer vacations was evidenced
by the reports of breaks entered at
police headquarters yesterday.
w. G. Bradford, 1885 Carl avenue,
filed notice that his home had been
entered and a valuable watch and
locket stolen.
Mrs. e. M. Mcintyre, 1901 Sunset
boulevard, stated that her home had
been broken into and the burglars had
obtained a gold chain, a lOcket, a seal
ring, cuff links and a dollar in change
which was in dresser in her room.
w. T. Williams, 1872 North Soto street,
reported that his home had been en-
tered and two watches, two fobs.
three rings and $2S5 in cash were
missing.
All entries were supposed to have
been made by means of pass keys.