Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-08-20


Nothing. We just talked
Magistrate Are you friend of the
prisoner? Buxom Witness-No, Tm
lis mother-in-law.-New York World
Say something to the little boy"
said Bobbie's mother. Say, kid" said
Bobbie, obediently kin you fight
YETI"
Il hear you spent your vacation
with friends" We were friends dur
ing the first week Louisville Cour-
ier-Journal
Are YOU going to take the late
train to Chicago?" No. the engineer
of the train is going to do that. -
Baltimore American.
Customer me bottle of Dop
ems Stomach Bitters. Druggist-We
haven't any in stock, madam, but
here's something just as bad
There are two sides to every Ques-
tiOn," said the broad minded man
Yes" answered Senator Sorghum;
a winning side and losing side"
Why did you leave your last
placer asked the boss, Il got six
months off for good behavior" an
swered the job seeker Chicago Daily
News.
Prospective Best Man--Got the mar
| riage license yet? Prospective Bride
groom-No I'm not going to get thaf
until the last thing She may go back
on me-
Bess-So you're engaged? Well.
we'll! As for me, wouldn't marry
the best man on earth. Jess-You
couldnt-l've got him.--ClevelanS
Leader.
Scott remember reading of verT
rich man who said he'd sooner be
poor. Mott--Yes, and probably you re
member reading somewhere that all
men are liars.
Il can't understand why Browz
should have failed Nor can /.
always thought he was doing finely
lie often came to me for advice DE
troit Free Press
Did you have good time at the
Sunday school picnic, Bobby" Il
should say So" answered Bobby, en-
Enthusiastically There was three
fights. - Buffalo Express
why Ethel. what's the matteF?~
asked her another as the little one
almost choked at the dinner table Il
got piece of bread head frst down
my cough pipe" explained Ethel.
Il never have no luck" Neither
! do l." responded the other citizen
Therefore | keep out OF enterprises
requiring large gobs of luck to be a
success. louisville Courier-JournaL
We, remarked the young married
woman, try to see how few quarreIs
we can have IN a year" We" said
the old married woman. try to see
how few cooks louisville Courier
! Journal.
Judge-How did the trouble begiat
Witness-It began, yo honah, when dc
chairman of de entertainment com
mlttee swatted do secretary over de
haid wifi de lovln cup-Boston Tran
script
Silicus- We should all strive &c
bear each other burdens Cynicus--
Yes, most OF US seem 10 think We
could bear each others burdens more
easily than we could our own. Phil
adelphia Record.
Bessie Oh, Mabel, / am In an
awful dilemma. I've quarreied with
lar nd he IN b la
ring back. Mabel-That's too bad
Bessie-But that Isn't the point. I've
forgotten which is his ring. Kansas
City Journal
What was the date of the Union of
the Crowns asked the school in
spector and the answer was 1908"
Right And why was this date ar
important one for you to rememberf"
Because you were sure to ask for it,
returned the little victim of examining
De Quiz-Dd he have any luck fish
ing2 De Whiz-Well, he says he
caught a number of fish, many OF
which would weigh three pounds. DE
Quiz-Yes. ! guess 1t would take a
great many OF the FISH he cought Ia
weigh three pounds.--Chicago Daily
News
Little BCbby-Papa. did you ever
see cyclone carrying houses around
up In the air, and cows and horses
and wagons upside down? Papa--No,
my son Little Bobby Did you ever
see a sea serpent? Papa-No, my son
Little Bobby should think K I'D be
tIresome TO live so long and never see
anything
You ran into this man at thirty
miles an hour and knocked him forty
feet" said the court. That, or a
little better, / suppose answered the
chauffeur. why didn't you slow
down." Mere precaution, your honor.
Once I shut of speed and hit man
so gently that he was able to climb
into the machine and give me lick
ing"
Your husband'll be all right now"