Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1909-01-31
Fixing Up the Tariff.


A lively burlesque of the tariff situa-
| ton in Congress was presented. Mem
beers of the club. representing Chairman
Payne. Representative DalZell and Minor
ity Leader Champ Clark of the ways
and means committee. were found seated
around table. They were engaged, IT
was announced, in revising the tariff
the revision. of course. being done by the
friends of the tariff. Was the republican
party a friend of the tariff? The answer
was TO be found in the size of the cam
paign contributions TO that party.
The first witness to appear was Andrew
Carnegie, the great philanthropist. of
whom it was said that every time he
| gave away a dollar it sounded like a
| cook stove falling down stairs. The
canny Scot was attired in kits and
plaid. He nearly threw the pseudo MIR.
Payne into fit by declaring at the offset
that he favored abolishing the duty on
steel He gave his reasons for this as
| founding recommendation.
What reason is there Tor tariH Oh
| steel now that | have gone out OF busl-
uess?' demanded Mr.. Carnegie. None
at all: it was well enough when l was
producing steel. There are no longer any
infant industries. They We're only in
fants when 1 owned them. Now they
are industrial giants. Why help giant:
Any person who is manufacturing steel
now and can't get along without a pro-
tectiye tariff ought to get out of the
eff YOU take the tariff off everything |
shall be rejoiced. I've got mine. Do you
understand? I've got mine.
This threw John Dalzell into a violent
spasm OF weeping. His walls filled the
air. His grief was something terrible
| to behold. while Chairman Payne tried to
assault Carnegie. but the Scotchman
| ambled defiantly off. threatening to gle
J EN- a libreery ii they dinna mind Out.
I Then Champ Clark demanded that some
southerners be called: men who not from
any personal or state motive demanded
| revision. but who insisted upon II pe-
cause their party demanded thorough
revision OF the tariff. He would show
some real simon-pure revisiOnists. There
entered a Texan. a South CarOlinian and
| a Florida planter. They were loud IN
! their denunciation of protection, that per-
nicious policy which robbed the many
for the benefit of the few They were
tariff revisionists from the ground up and
they made the welkin ring with their de-
nunciations of the robber tariff.
| Free Trade in Everything But
| BUT-the Texan wanted duty on
hides If il had TO be revised it better
! be raised but never lowered. The main
| stay of Texas prosperity must be fos-
tered The South Carolinian, swelling
with pride in the history of his state
and the glory of his people. voices utter
| condemnation of protection in general
as a pernicious policy, to be abhorred
by all true democrats. BUT-there must
be duty on sea island cotton and re-
| tention of the duty on rice or look out
| for the consequences. The representative
| of the Imperial state of Florida" had
a scathing denunciatOn for the northern
ers. with their swollen fortunes gained
| from the protective tariff, and the trusts
who in a short winter season left
enough money in Florida to enable the
inha bitants to live during the summer
Down with the tariff and protection
BIT-that duty on citrus fruits must bt
! retained for Florda's dear sake.
! At this Champ Clark wept loud and
| long He denounced the southerners as
| apostates to their party and bid them
begone in shame.
| 4 timid soul. shivering and afraid, who
| said he was only poor consumer
! came next. and wanted TO know what the
consumer would get. He was promptly
and decisively told by Chairman Payne
that the consumer would get 1t in the
neck" and that settled him.
Then the ghost of Winfield Scott Han
cock, "the man who was laughed to
death because he said the tariff was a
local issue" stalked in and broke up the
| meeting.
Country Uplift Problem Settled.
President Roosevelts much discussed
commission for the uplift Of the farmer