New-York tribune., 1909-03-28
NO III.
TIE NEST EGG
BY ". v. Jacobs.

Copyright 1907. by Charles scribner's s,ns7
'Artfulness.'' said the night-watch1nan. srrok-
ing placidly, is gift; but it don't pay always
I've met some ar1ful ones in nv tire-rlerty Of
en- but can't truthfully say as 'ow any of them
was the better for meeting me"
He rose slowly from the packinE-case on which
he had been sitting and. stamping down the roint
Of a rusty nail with MS heel resumed his seat
remarkng that he had endured il for some time
under the impression that it only a splinter
I've surprised more than one in my time" he
continued, sowiY- when 7 met one Of these
ere artful ones used fust Of all to pretend TO be
more stupid than ] really am"
He stopped and stared fxedly.
More stupid than locked he said.
he stopped again
More stupid than wot they thought looked"
he seid, speaking with marked deliberation
And I'd let EN- go and or until I thought
I 'ad 'ad enough, and then turn round on en-
Nobody ever got the better o except my wife
and that only before we was married Two
nights afterwards she found a fsh-hook in ny
trouser pocket and arJer that / could ha' left
untold gold there-if I'd ha' had it Il spoilt wot
some people call the honeymoon. but it paid in
the long
one O. the worst things a man can 90 IS TO
take up artfulness ali Of a sudden. I never knew
II TO answer Yet. and tell you Of a case
that'n prove my words true.
Its some years ago now, and the chap il 'ap-
pened 10 was a young man. sh.pmate mine
named Charlie Tagg- Very steady young chap
he was, too steady for most Of 'em. That's 'ow
It was me and i'm got 10 be such pals.
He'd been saving up COR years TO get married
and al The advice W5e could give i'm didn't ave
any effect he saved up nearly every penny Of
is money and gave il TO his gaI TO keep for i'm
and the time In speaking of she'd got seventy
two pounds Of is and seventeen-and-six Of 'er
Own 10 SET up housekeeping with
Then z thing happened that I've known to
'appen sailor-nen afore- At Sydney e got silly
OF another gal and started walking with her.
and afore he knew ne about he'd promised
10 marry 'er too
Sydney am London being hong way from
eacn other was in IS favor. but the thing that
troubled 'i1n was 'ow 10 get that sevenIy-tvo
pounds out Of Emma Cook, is London gal so
as he could marry the other with il II worried
i'm all the way home and by the time We got into
the London River is head was ali IN maze with
Il Emma Cook 'ad got it all saved up in the
bank. 10 take d little shop with when they got
spliccd and 'ow TO get il he could not think
-FIe went straight of TO Poplar. where she lived
as soon the ship was berthed- He walked all
the way so as to ave time FOR thinking
but zyot with humping into two old gentlemen with
bad ternpers and being nearly over by cab
man with white 'orse and red whiskers, he got
70 the house without aving thought Of anything
saThey was just finishing their tea as = got
there, and they all seemed so pleased 20 see i'm
ths- q made II worse than ever for i'm Mrs.
Cook who 'ad pretty near finished. gave i'm her
OWL cup 70 drink out Of. and said that she ad
crealnt Of i'm the night afore last and old Cook
ssld tfat he 'ad got good-looking e shouldn l
have known him
Il should ave passed I'm in the street. be ses
never ses such alteration
They'll be nice looking couple ses his Wife
looking at & younE chap named George Smith,
that I'd been sitting next TO Emma
ssCharlie Tagg flied is mouth with bread and
hz,fter and wondered 'ow he TO begin. He
squeezed Emmas End Just for the sake Of keep
ing I'd appearances ana all the time e was think
ing OF the other gal waiting for i'm thousands
O miles away
you've come 'ome just in the nick o time
ses old Cook; i, you'd done It o purpose you
couldn't ave arranged It better
.souasbcdy's birthday He< Charlie, trying TO
smile
.,old Cook shook his cad. Though mine is next
wednesdsy' he ses and thank you for thinking
Of IL No: you're just in time for the biggest par
gain 81 the chandlery line that anybody ever ad
a chance Of II you admit ha' come back We
should have ad TO ha' done It without you
Eighty po1nds' Mrs. Cook smiling at
Charlie With the money Emrna,s got saved and
your wages this trip you'll ave plenty. You
must come round arter and ave look al 1t
Little place not arr q mile from ere. old
Cook Properly worked Up. the way Emman do
It. it'n be a little fortune wish I'd had a chance
like 81 in my young time
He sat shaking his cad 20 think he'd
lost and Charlie Tagg sat staring at I'm and
wondering wot he 10 DO
MY idea is for Charlie 70 go for few more
zsyiges arter they're married while Emma works
m the business ses Mrs. Cook: she'll 1e ali right
with Young Bill and Sarah Ann TO 'eIp her and
keen 'er company while he's away
Wen see as she amt loneivr' George
Smith, turning 10 Charlie
Charlie Tagg gave a bit Of q cough and said
II wanted considering he said II good
doing things in 'urry and then repenting OF
ssnn All the rest OF your life And e said he'd
been given TO understand that chandlery wasn't