Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1909-11-05

mite reason. Dethroned Man-Oh!
just because!--Puck
Examiner Now, children, what is
the difference between pro" and
"con?" Bright Boy-Please. sir, they're
spelt different.
Placed your order for an aeroplans
YETI" mo. I'm waiting to find out
what the 1910 style of house mortgage
Is going to be"-Detroit Free Press.
You can't tell what sort of cook
a wife will make" And you can't
tell what sort of wife cook will
make. and there you are. Washing
ton Herald.
Why did you accept George?" He
was so much more original than the
other fellows" in what way?" He
was the one that asked me TO be his
wife. Puck.
Servant twho has been sont to chas-
tise a stray cat for stalking ohickens)
Il couldnt-catoh I'm mum--for
the nearer got to 'im--the further .
got away.-Puneh.
Cashier--You'N have TO bring some
one to identify you before We can
cash this check Got any friends in
the town. Stranger-Not one, I'm the
tax collector Exchange.
When you first saw Niagara Falls,
did you feel that almost irresistihleim-
pulse TO throw yourself over the preci-
pice that so many experience?" mo.
| hadn't seen my hotel-bill yet"
"Owd Georges wooden legs been
giving him pain lately" Don't you
be tallSln so foolish Wfllum." IT'S
sure enough. Is owd woman been
a-whoppin' i'm wi it."-London Opin-
lon.
1T lis too bad that Peary did not
know before his last dash for the pole
that Cook had been there ahead OF
him" "Why?" Because he would
have been hot all the way there and
back again Houston Post,
You have an enormous appetite"
said thin man enviously What do
you take for it2" I'm all my expert
ence,' replied his plump friend, IL
have found nothing more suitable than
! food. "--Philadelpht Inquirer
Mr. Brown and his family were
standing in front Of the lion cage,
John" said Mrs Brown, IF those
animals were to escape. whom would
you save first-me or the children
ME" answered John without hesita-
tion."
Beautiful Gtrl--Gardener, don't
make flower bed there 1t viii spoil
our eroquet ground Gardener-Ca Can't
help 1t, miss. Them's my orders. Your
father says he is going TO have this
garden devoted to horticulture, MOI
husbandry."
You say 1t was your double that
stole the chickens2' "Yassuh,' you
know gave you thirty days once for
chicken stealing?" "Ah remembah
sub" Well this time you get sixty
That's the courts double. "-Philadel
phia Ledger.
Back from your two weeks, ! see
Yep" II presume you got engaged q
number OF tlmes?" Nav: things don't
go Nike that In real life, somehow.
got engaged the first week all right
enough. but 1t took me all the second
week to break II of Washington
| Herald
Jones" said tina veterinary sur,
| o,anp yhn haH rsaI1ad rs on Ianaa
/ pet dog. you should take better care
of this CANNES teeth" why" asked
Jones, do you think they are becom
ing decayed?' NO" answered the
veterinary, but just as came In he
put most of them in my leg. "-St
Louis Star
And 10 think. to think" quoth she
that such heavenly bliss that fell to
my lot might have escaped me for
everl Dear Bob! Did | ever tell you
he had proposed TO me twiee?" Then
| the unsympathetic auditor assumed an
air of innocence Didn't you hear
him the first timer" she inquired with
raised eyebrows.
Two Ladies. previously unacquainted
we're conversing at a reception. After
few conventional remarks the young
or exclaimed Il cannot think what
has upset thas tall blonde man oven
there He was 80 attentive little
while ago, but he won't look at me
now" Perhaps" said the other, she
saw me come in. He's my husbandl'
Philadelphia Inquirer.
But, darling" murmursd the love
lorn youth, every night for two weeks
| / have been on my Bonded knees be
fore you Have you no pity?" 81 Ger
tainIy have, Horace" spoke up the
| pretty filrt, as she reached for hel
handbag; here's whole quarter CO
nave your trousers pressed After *
much bending they must be baggy a
| the knees Wasp.
| A commuter was walking up and
down the platform waiting for tn,
| train that nj yayg seemed tn Ia daiav