davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
what Ia Democrntf

f'roCn The kichmond Journal.
The Democrat who stands by the action
OF the party convention and bows 10 the
VIII OF the majority. even though the
majority has run counter 20 his own
views, Is the answer TO the question.
What is a Democrat" Unless Demo
Gratis learn, as the Republicans have
learned. 20 stand by the action Of a ma
1ority OF the party. we cannot hope TO be
successful. We must learn the lesson or
subscribing TO the conclusions OF the ma
Jority before we can teach methods OF
party victory
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Patient and Physician.

From the CleTelspd Leader.
When the patient called on his doctor
he found the good man in a state OF
great apprehension
I've got all the symptoms OF the dis
ease you have" said the doctor. I'm
sure I have caught IL from you"
What are you so scared about?' asked
the patient
Why, man." replied the doctor. II
don't think I can cure it,
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Fortunate Nr. Merer.

From the Springfield Republican
It appears that Henry White. Ambas-
sador 70 France. is 20 retire. perhaps at
the end Of the year He Is charged with
falling short OF the required qualifications
os being able to know an American
when he sees one" which IS declared 20
be an essential diplomatic service under
this administration II such is 70 be the
rule. Mr. Meyer may be reckoned for
tunate IN being safely under cover in the
ahl-of
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
And the Old Man Grinned.

From the Philadelphia Press
Duke" asked the heiress eagerly. did
you see father2''
Yes"
'"WeIl?"
I'VE talked about the weather"
What? Lose your nerve again? Why
don't you brace Up and talk like mani
a subject Of king on whose domain the
sun never SETS
Can't" moaned the duke All the
time I was In your fathers Office he kept
grinning at big painting"
What painting?"
The battle of Bunker Hill"
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

The Newport News is being gently
guyed BY numerous contemporaries for
saying: An optimist is a man who
lives in Newport News" Never mind;
only an optimist would have been re-
freshingly frank enough to have said It.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
How to De BeautifuI.

From the Des Moires Tribune
To have a youthful, blooming COM
plexion, a clear eye. and the animation
that is always more attractive than a
perfect profile. one needs only 70 live as
much as possible out Of doors. sleep in
ventilated rooms. eat simple and whole
some food. and walk a great deal Beauty
does not need 10 be coa1ed II one is
healthy.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Thirty years ago cotton seed was a
waste product absolutely. Now they make
genuine olive oil Of II. not to mention but
ter. lard. chewing gum. and paint. Should
not be surprised to learn that they make
obejoyful Of 1t. too. down where the
cotton grows-on the quiet. strictly. OF
course.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

One OF the leading statesmen OF China
has been officially invited TO commit
suicide Doubtless some OF our leading
standpatters In this country are COM
hitting political suicide Just now. albeit
they may not be aware Of IT,
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Enemr of RusIne.s.

From the Austin Statesman
The business interests Of the country
have every reason 10 wish that the fears
felt by the reactionaries Of an eleventh.
hour uprising against the most fragrant
OF their monopoly schedules are well
founded. Business needs a tariff. for
spoils, subject 70 the vieissitudes OF politi-
cal warfare. is the enemy OF business.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

The new Sultan Of Turkey is a typical
democrat" says the New York Posts
Constantinople correspondent II Demo
crat' means the same thing in Turkey
that II means in this counuy-whatever
that is-he viii be out OF a Job. in all
probability. before he has halfway
learned the ropes.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Tha. senatoriaI Football.

Fron he Rochester Herald
This certainly has been the most siren
uous session OF Nr. Aldrich's Hfe- II Is
quite evident that several ornate corners
have been rubbed from his prestige, since
his colleagues have been using him as
football
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
30 Hlrher Crttici.m mon.

From the Detroit News.
Judas had the good grace to 90 out
and hang himself. Unfortunately for
him. the higher criticism" had not yet
been invented. or he might have been
invited 70 deliver course OF lectures be-
fore some church society TO prove that
the Jesus whom he betrayed was not so
much after all. but that the Christ OF
idealistic fancy was the main thing.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Only They pare Quote Taft.

From tae Los Angeles Express
What a sorry commentary Il Is on the
condition OF the Republican party in the
Senate that only the Senators who are
called insurgents" dare quote tariff doc
trine from the speeches made by Mr..
Taft when a candidate for the Presi-
dencyt
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Mr.. Sisson said some foolish things al
Memphis. and Mr.. Hollingsworth said
some foolish things-or tried to-in the
House Neither incident proves that the
war is not over. however.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
No Doubt About That.

From the Knoxville Sentinel.
A navy NAV be a promoter Of peace.
There is some doubt. OF course. How
ever. one thing is settled: q big navy
makes big bills
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Very few voters thought year ago
they would be praying to-day that moth
ing worse than the re-enactment OF the
Dingley law might happen 70 them via
Congress.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

On our resources, SO significant in what
it means Tor the future OF the West.
should be studied and some remedy de-
yised.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
From the Porter. View Point.

Frcm ths New YORK Telegraph.
Two Pullman car pOrters meet outside
the Grand Central after a nights run
Where's Ike Stevens. Bill? He hasn't
been on the Job for two nights"
NO. He had a birth UP at his house -
Girl OF boy?"
Twins"
Huh. I don't call that a birth: I call
that a section
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Rome, Ca, has barred its streets 10
automobiles" says the ST. Louis Post
Dispatch. A base and vile sIander. Rome
merely insists that they 90 not all try
TO occupy the same street al the same
time.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Incidental Reform.

From the Brooklyn Eagle
Those new gowns that hook Up the side
win discourage the mean habit many men
have formed Of saying things behind their
wives back.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Second Money Always HIS.

From the Detroit Free Pres
Senator Bailey is a good fighter. but
whenever he mixes up with his temper
he invariably gets second money.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Edward Everett Hale" is q headline
recently appearing on practically every
editorial page in the country. And all
mention him but TO praise hiEa.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Mr.. Taft has suffered two successive
defeats at golf recently. Mr.. Taft Is
much more anxious TO keep the peace
than Mr.. Roosevelt ever was-Or ever
will be, for that matter, doubtless.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

In the State of Washington it is a crime
even TO have a cigarette in ones posses
sion. We think mighty little OF the cigar
ette but we think even less Of such n
fnoi L. "
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
ALITTLE NONSENSE.

VERY UNPLEASANT.
When skies are gray
IN later May
And blizzards roar IN June,
It's very hard
For any bard
TO sing cheerful tune.
The bard in vain
May rack his brain
For blithsome lays 70 sing;
The ballxy muse
VIII not enthuse
About an almost-spring.
just So.
Justice has a leaden heel
1T must hold her back some"
But it enables her TO kick hard when
she does catch up with an offender"
A Pleasing Smile.
You seem 10 Ike 10 contemplate the
tulips in the garden bed"
Yes" said the bibulous citizen; they
look Ike tray OF cocktails 10 me"
Anything to Please.
VIII that cook take the place2"
she says she doesn't speak English
Tell her well learn her language"
He Knows.
When doubts and fears
Assail the state.
We should consult
The graduate
Such Is Life
Count your chickens before they are
hstched. If you want to-
Say on"
1T may be the only chance yOu'n get /"
Hard Labor.
rs poverty a crime7"
Well. It carries a penalty. anyhow"
More Than Likely.
What would you DO II you had lot OF
money!"
7 s'pose I'd begin 70 worry about how
I'd get along II I hadn't"
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Wait for the BIC NnfEe-

From the Savannah News
A Texas prophet says the world IS
coming TO an end this summer. Mean
while the wise farmer viii keep on killing
grass until he really hears the crack OF
doom
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
An E4aErerated peniaI.

From the Springfield Union
Geraldine Farrar now admits that her
denial Of her engagement to Sig. Scot
II was somewhat exaggerated.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Enthusiasm in the Cracker State nova
days is tempered with a large measure Of
anxiety. While Little Joe" Brown Is
about 70 be inaugurated, the legislature
Is also about 20 meet.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Deaes AIl CaIcuIatIon.

From the Omaha Bee
Astronomers are able to predict with
certainty an eclipse OF the sun or moon.
but Congress continues &c defy mathe-
matical calculations.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
A bling at dc Tarheel..

from tt1s brnlngham Views
A North Carolina debating society is
reported 70 have decided that the world
is fiat. The loyalty OF some sections in
thinking they are the whole show is
really remarkable
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
On with Your Knocks-

From the Melbourns Tines
The newspaper which never gets a
knock is too silent 10 be heard. II you
feel like knocking this paper because Of
its honest convictions-knock.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

And now comes belated Alabama man
and says it was jimmy who put the
kettle on, Angels and ministers OF grace,
defend US from this Jimmy" person!
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

An unsuitable boat. Of light. slender
construction. has been invented SO long
as It will turn over. however. the fool
that rocks II will be happy.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

II is some relief to note the evident
determination OF the courts 10 make
Harry Thaw. stand pat
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

What If the Buffalo News did refer 70
'Longfenow's Barefoot Boy?'" The
News probably does not claim TO have
anything on Homer in the nodding line.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
He d 10 Mrfh-

From the Augusta Herald.
Speaking Of myths, the bill collector
certainly does not belong TO that tribe.
and moTe's the pity.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Poor Mrs. Gould. She had only three
quarters Of a million dollars for spending
money during the past fve years. And
beefsteak and tripe so high. too.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

II the President should vetoz' specu-
lates the Macon Telegraph. Why should
the good old Telegraph vex its soul with
such questions?
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
Ade Saw Him at close Range.

Prem the Springfield Union
Coming on the same ship with Chan
cellor Day. George Ade has a splendid
chance to see what real humorist looks
Ike.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

We suspect it will require only one
Invitation TO secure Gen. Fred Grants
presence at the next Confederate re-
union.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

A Kansas City man claims TO have had
his religion scared" out Of him. The
old way used TO be 70 scare II into
people.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
How Annapolis May BE Happy.

From the Baltimore Sun
How 10 have a happy life IN Annapolis:
'Cut down the weeds, muzzle the ours,
kill the mosquitoes. and help TO make
life worth the living.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
He IL So ntnerent.

Prom the Chicago Reco-d- -Herald.
One OF the very best things about La
Toilette IL that he Is so unlike Psnrose
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

The Denver Republican calls Mr.. La
Toilette "a windjammer from WIscon-
SIN" That is so much easier than at
tempting 20 answer the Senator.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Well. well; cheer up! Perhaps these
June showers will bring forth July
flowers.
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Justice has leaden heel.
1T must hold her back some"
But II enables her to kick hard when
she does catch up with an offender"
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14
IA PIepsinR simIle.

You seem 70 Ike 70 contemplate the
tulips in the garden bed
Yes" said the bibulous citizen; they
look Ike e tray OF cocktails 10 me"
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

'Of recent years there has been a
marked tendency on the part OF American
manufacturers who have developed an
export trade 20 establish factories IN
Canada or in Great Britain and Germany
II IS something more vital than lower
wages and expenses that has drawn them
thither, according 10 A A. EbersOn. OF
81. Louis. who recently returned 70 this
country from London. where bis firm
has established a plant
Under existing conditions as tc ship
ping possibilities IN the United States.
said Mr. Eberson. 7 believe there Is more
money for Us 70 manufacture Tor export
20 England than here. You can 60 10 any
wharf In London and see English ships
bringing freight from al parts of the
world, and you can send your goods out
from English ports IN those same ships
You manufacture in the United States
and look Tor American ships 20 take your
goods and you 90 not find them II you
want 70 freight BY ships you must turn
70 foreigners. That's something Tor the
opponents OF the American ship subsidy
bin 70 think about It's a fact that has
determined more than one American maa-
ufscturer TO establish plants IN England.
for we are not the only ones that have
gone over there"
The Washington herald., 1909-06-14

Anything to Please.
VIII that cook take the placer"
She says she doesn't speak English
Tell her well learn her language
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Raising Sheep in Georgia.

+. For years the farmers of Georgia
+ have raised the perennial cry that
the sheep killing dog stood forever
as a barrier against the development
Of the. sheep industry in this State.
The Legislature just adjourned has
taken decisive step toward putting
a stop to this obstacle. A tax of ST
now goes on dogs of both sexes in
Georgia, regardless of ownership,
race, color or previous condition of
seryitude.
The measure is, in a way incom-
plete, since passages Of the law con-
flict with each other. At the same
time it marks radical advance over
no protection at all, and it is toler-
ably &C. tain that if the people of any
specified country make up their minds
to enforce the statute they will find
latitude suficlent5to that end. 20
With the menace of the mongrel
and the cur removed, or greatly min
imized, there is no reason why the
raising of sheep in Georgia should
not gradually attain important pro-
portions.-Atlanta Constitution.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
and for between seasons thin silks /

.as ! y : - =
and for between seasons thin silks
and pongee will be much ii vogue as
well as linen and cotton fabrics. En-
broidered muslins; are exceedingly
handsome SO treated, and to the list
of familiar materials must be added
waist lengths of genuine East Indian
muslin embroidered in Indian style.
The waist Is made. with front and
backs. 1t is laid q In groups of fine
tucks and there Is wide tuck over
each shoulder, which gives becoming
fulness. Whensthe neck is cut square
1t Is finished with trimming. when
made high, with a regulation stock.
The sleeves are made in one piece
each and are tucked IL groups, the
tucks at the elbows being stitched for
a short distance only, so allowing be-
coming, graceful and comfortable full
ness.
The quantity of material required
for the medium size is four and five
eighth yards twenty-one, three and
one-half yards twenty-four or two and
one-fourth yards thirty-two or forty
four inches wide, with two yards of
banding and three yards of edging.
n
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06

tine of, the household work. Doc
tors claim that it is this alone which
is. in a large measure responsible for,
the many ills and ailments which
women are afflicted with and WHICH
the men are free from. So many of
her daily tasks require that she.
| should lean or stoop over that 1t is
not long before this unnatural atti-
tude is responsible for some serious
land chronic illness which often
makes her al invalid for the rest Of
her life.
The stoopiess dustpan which has
been recently invented enables her to
do the work of gathering up. the ac-
cumulations on the floor without the
least inclination of her body. The
new implement has long handle by
which it is carried conveniently, and
at the same time the handle controls
/. the operation of lid which opens for
the reception of the dust when the
pan is placed on the floor, and as it
is raised after gathering up the ac-
cumulations the lid closes, hiding the
contents from view and preventing
their being scattered by the wind or
by Observation-Disclosures Star.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Centre Lid For Stove.

@ An invention of especial interest
and convenience to housekeepers Is
the auxiliary stove, lid plate designed
by Delaware man. By means OF
this it is possible to have lid over
the centre Of the stove, where the;
fire is hottest. =, ~
The old style stove plates are obs
long, with rounded ends and a piece
set in the middle which leaves cir
cular opening at each end. While 1t.
is possible by this arrap cement to re-,
move, either or both lids and the
bridge plate, it is not possible to. so
dispose them as to have one opening
in the centre. N ,
The new stove plate overcomes this
disadvantage by providing a stove
top with supplemental plates which
may be fitted in the ends and leave a
circular opening in the centre, on
which one of the ordinary lids; will
fit. When the fire Is low, as in the
morning, it is desired TO set the coffee
pot, for instance, over. the hottest
part of the fire.. which is the middle
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06

said it may be used with the advan-
tage that it does not mar. the floor
or its covering, whatever its charac-
ter may be. 1t is especially recon-
mended for polished floors. The de-
vice consists of a rounded button Of
porcelain or glass fitted with split
spring stem, which prevents it from
dropping out when the piece of fur
niture is lifted from the floor. The
two parts are joined by ball and
socket joint by means of which the
portion coming in contact with the
foor is PIE. mitted to adjust itself to
any irregularities Of tie surface over
which it may be passing. These
shoes were originally made for use
on pianos, SO that the instruments
might be moved around at will, but
it has been found necessary to make
them in a number of different sizes
for different articles of furniture
Washington Star.
Il.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Eyolunon Of a Ball Player
BY E. a. GoEWEY.

"I once knewsa real ball player.
AS youth he could stand longer oil
an evening against lamppost on the,
corner in. frsnt Of the depot without
moving muscle than any boy ir!;
town, and by the time he:was seven.
teen he could understand what was
in the newspapers, If any one would
read the items to him In loud, cleal,
tone and skip all the words OF more
than two syllables. In the daytime, !.
however, it was different. He went
out to the brick lotiabout seven-thir.
ty a. m. each fair day and played
ball most Of the time until sundown:
He was considered some ball player
| by the home folks, and finally signed
| with State league team, where he
sometimes received his salary in real
money. After a time he became SO
proficient with the stick that he
joined fast company. In fact, to-
make long story short, he became
,ne of the greatest players in the big
leagues and is far from 'has-been'
to-day.
- "But, and here's the rub. I have.
watched that boy year after year and.
imagined that 1t was his splendid eye,
his broad shoulders, his great rum
ming, and his, lively work with his.
| hands and feet in the infield that
made him the fine ball player I loved,
to see play. Now, what do I find?
Why, it was nothing of the kind. It
wasn't long years of practice, splen-
did athletic qualifications, and a pair
Of shoulders like bull that had made
him great ball player. Nay, nay!'
It was because when a batter stepped
to the plate his brain cells would be-
gin to 'convulate' with lightning like
rapidity and he'd think out the cor
rect answer to. the situation Just
like that He could see that the
man was a left-hander, stood we'll up
to the plate, and that he was watch
ling the pitcher with his right eye,
and spot midway between the box
and third base with his left. This
meant that the batter would hit the
ball hard to the spot watched by his
left eye, and that slight hummock
in the grass there would cause 1t to
carom off at an angle of forty-fve
degrees, and that in just one and
-fiftySninths of second after
the ball left the bat it would travel
the distance of one hundred and fifty
nine feet four inches to where the
fielder ought to be. Figuring this
out 'just like that in a flash the
fielder would be at the proper spot
on time, nail the ball, throw it to
first, and complete the play. I had
thought all along that this player
\ had a brain makeup that would
closely resemble a scrambled egg If
it tackled mathematics and geomet-
rical angles, and that instinct and
knowledge of past performances fig
ured largely in his work. Now I
find that while his name signed to
the payroll resembles map of a
Missouri river, his think-works are
mathematicalIy mastodonic. 1t is
this new light that is going to make
me enjoy my baseball more thorough
ly in the future" e.."-Leslie's Weekly.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Didn't Want Justice.

:, A well known attorn of this city
had client whose cas- presented a
mass of technicalities. Of which his
lawyer took every advantage. Before
the final argument and handing dow
of opinion, however, the client was
forced to take journey Of some hun
dreds of miles and was compelled to
be absent for several weeks. He ar
ranged with his attorney to flash him
by telegraph the result Of the trial of
his case, but told him to so word the
telegram that the addressee alone
would comprehend its import.
The result was the awarding of a
verdict in favor Of the litigant in
question, and his delighted counsel
sent him the following message:
Justice and truth have tri-
umphed."
What was his amazement at re-
ceiving few hours later telegram
from his client which said:
yours received. Hard luck. Ap-
peal Immediately. = Philadelphia
Times.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Nine Gored Skirt.

Here is one. of the newest skirts,
gored to fit smoothly over the hips,
but with graceful lines at the foot
caused by the pleated lower portions,
which gives the straight lines that are
extremely smart and graceful. The
inverted pleat at centre front Is
stitched to form wide tucks, which
ere held in place with groups of three
buttons. The skirt is illustrated in
one of the new blue diagonal serges
with jet buttons, but all colors and
materials that are suited to the odd
skirt or the coat suit will be found
appropriate, the linens and pongees Of
the present,as well as the heavier ma
terials of the coming season.
The skirt is cut in nine cores, the
fronts and back extending the full
length, while the side cores are
heightened by pleated portions that
give becoming fulness at the lower
edge. The closing is made invisibly
under, the left edge Of the box pleat
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1909-10-06
Lucky Jumbo.

@Life with you must be monos-
orous,D remarked the monkey as he
swung by his tail in the park zoo.
why so, my friend?" queried the
lazy Jumbo,
4Well, all you have to do is to sit
here all Gay End be stuffed with pea
nuts" .
the elephant smiled an elsphantine
SMILE
THAT may be, my friend: but I'd
rather be here being stuffed with pea
nuts than over in Africa being stuffed
for a museum exhibit.
Which shows that even an elephant
knows good thing when he sees it
Boston Post. :.