The Winslow mail., 1909-12-25
Copyright, by Short Stories Co, Ltd.)

Jld yer ever snake hands with
buffalo's tail?" inquired Sunset Joyce
4 did, once. In full possession of all
me physical appurtenances an intel
lectual we'll bein', | took hold of a
buffalo be the tail. Me tracks were a
mile an three-quarters apart an
covered three states in less'n thirty
minutes. Not that made a protracted
stay in either; me conveyance didn't
hesitate sufficient.
IT happened in Kansas. All things
of consequence in me career happened
in Kansas for a space of five years.
was hoidin' down government claim
out there-an' when | say hOldiD' it
down ! mean Just that | had to hold
it down. What with cyclones an other
evil-minded persons, coincident with
the great an glorious state of Kansas
it kept fellow busy.
'Bein', as | may say, the only hui
man bein' in the precinct except the
boss, had things pretty much me
own way for a time. l was the mayor
an the chief of police, an the fire de-
partment, an the board of aldermen,
an the most imminent citizen. But
all this grandeur was oppressive after
awhile. Bein' naturally of a peaceful
dispensation l liked solitude, an here
was miles of it, the most solitudinOus
solitude | ever sat down in the middle
of. But it was too much. | useter get
that lonesome sometimes I'd go out
an swear at the sun just to see if Id
lost me voice. An | hadn't
About the time | was gettin' line
on the fact that | couldn't raise any
thing on my claim but an umbrella.
decided that ! needed company, SO
sint for me brother-a mere lad as
said | had to ride sixty miles to mail
In become an established instigation
at that time-an if it had been | guess
/ was too rural for it to reach mean
then he had to come all the way from
Newark, New Jersey. 1t was five
weeks before he arruv. Newark was
glitterin' an pageantraceous metrop-
oils compared to the place where
was.
Well, | druv me brother out to the
farm. The good Lord may know what
he expected. | don't Anyhow It
wasn't anything like what he found
He was young an frivolsome, an had
just about reached that age whin a
man takes real pride in the way he
combs his hair-an' spinds all his time
at it. So naturally the claim didn't
make any hit with him. think he had
a girl-or maybe his liver was out of
order.
''Whin we druv up to the dug-out
where | lived, | says:
Here we are,' says l.
'Where?' he says. Where's the
house?' says he
That's the house, says |, p'intin'
to the dug-out, that's the mansion
wherein we shall be domiciled,' I says.
That little hole in the ground?'
says he, with the brushes over it?' lie
says.
That's it, me lad, says |. Drorin'
room, parlor, liberry dinin' room, bed
rooms, bath an kitchen | says The
boss sleeps in the Kitchen says |.
We'll, me brother didn't say any,
thing, but | could gee that his men,
tai requirements were wrestlin' with
that.
I'VE wint in an had dinner.
Sunset, says me brother, yer
didn't put the butter on the table, he
says.
NO says I. 'Yer'n be surprised,
] says, how we'll yer can get along
without it. says I, me not havin'
looked a COW in the face in so long I'd
forgot whether it was animal or veg
etable.
oh says he, an he ct in silence
while he thought it out. DO yer ever
have any company out here?' he says,
after awhile.
Sure, says |. The best in the
world | says. Me- An | lighted
ME pipe with that degree of superior
ity which is natural with the most
imminent citizen, one of whom | was
which, as it were.
but who do you talk to-? he
says.
Talk to?' says |. talk to meseH.
whin | have time to stop an listen,
says.
'An' thin he had to think that out.
He had a lot of things to think out
after that. | had to do it meself.
Despite these splindid intellectual ex-
ercises me brother didn't seem happy.
an, faith, | didn't blame him at that,
poor lad. Yer see, there wasn't a
thing to do but work, an nothin' to
see but miles an miles of prairie,
an nothin' to eat but corn bread an
SOW belly, an nothin' to drink but
water, an we had to haul that five
miles, an it tasted like mortal
sin That's the sort of place Kan
sas is, or was.
Once or twice me brother kicked
over the traces, an declared he was
goin' back to New Jersey-an' yer
know a man must be desprit whin
he says a thing like that. Thin he
was that discontint that he refused
to work. That was a vital conse
uuence But | got around it, be me
,,o+oriOnc dinl0macy diScovorcd