The Cairo bulletin., 1909-09-06
PILLINCTON'S
PATENT
Copyright. by j. B. Lippincott Coz
by Amos r. Wells


and Mrs. Pillington was the subject
OF women's inventiveness-or non
lnventiveness, rather Ellington
prided himself en- his mechanical
genius, and was always fishing for an
acknowledgment of 1t from his wife;
but she mindful of house numbered
from attic to cellar with futile con.
trivances, observed always grim
silence.
One day. ss Mr.. Pillington was ex-
patiating on his favorite theme. Mrs.
Pillington CHANGED to be feeding the
baby with a nursing bottle.
Il WISH" she remarked. that with
all mems superior inventive ability.
they would contrive good way to
feed a baby
Pillington's interest was at once
aroused.
Now, that's just like woman" he
exclaimed. Here's field peculiarly
hers. Here's something forced on her
attention from the days of Eve. And
yet III warrant that every patent
nursing bottle in the world was IL
vented by man.
Il should think sol" sighed Mrs FIJI
ling.on
Well, what's the matter with 'em?"
he inquired
Matter? Everything. You can't
keep them clean, The hole gets
clogged up with a shred of cloth. II
you make 1t larger. the baby gets the
milk too fast. If you keep the air out,
1t colapses and the baby gets nothing.
II you let the air in the baby gets the
collie. Oh, they're horrid."
"Lemme see It," and Mr.. Pillington
looked critically at the nursing bottle
Maria Ellington, day after tomorrow
Will show you what man can do.
Evidently this thing was some wou-
ans maneshift."
For two days the inventor was mys-
teriously silent, though sagely observ.
ant at babv's feeding. time. On the
second evening he brought to his wife
with an air of triumph, marvellous
affair.
What is IT," she asked.
"Pillington's Patent Feeding-B Bot
tle'" replied her husband, proudly
I've filled It, You try it."
Mrs, Ellington examined the appa
ratus suspiciously
What's this big bulb for?"
That, madam, is to clean 1t with
force the water In and out by suction;
also to force the milk into the mouth.
Now, no woman would ever have
thought of that"
i agree with YOU" remarked Mrs.
Ellington, dryly. And what's this
brass arrangement In the neck?
Isn't 1t part of some gas fxture?"
Yes" Mr., Pillington admitted, un.
temporarily, it is.
But that's the great point You see
his screw? Work it out, and you en-.
srge the oritice; screw 1t in, and you
diminish the flow of milk. Beauti
ully simple. and yet no woman would
ever have thought of it. Now try II
IN the baby"
Never" shrieked his wife. What!
POISON his little froatsy-toatsy with a
lorrid old brass gas machine?" And
he embraced Pillington, Junior. pro-
ectingly. Besides, how do you know
til work? Have you tried it,"
No need of trying It," replied the
INVENTOR IF you had a mechanical
lrpA :
ust by looking at 1t. Gimme the
ably"
Il WON'T" shrieked Mrs. Pillington.
Try your horrid contraption on your
elf first I cont believe you could
uck drop through it,"
I'll show you!" said Mr.. Pillington.
ercely. You see where the milk
-"
Yes, Mrs. Pillington saw.
Then her husband tipped back his
cad, bottle in the air and began
hewing the rubber neck. He grew
ed in the face. Evidently he was
citing nothing.
"It-it-doesn't seem to come, some
'ay,' he confessed, at last.
ANY air.hole In it?" asked Mrs,
Ellington, kindly.
"Air-hole? What'd want of an air
ole?' gasped her husband. "Oh. yes,
have 1t, Gimme that knittingnee
orgot little point" And Mr.. Pill
lgton jabbed hole In the rubber
lbe that Joined the bottle with the
ectfon of the gas jet.
But isn't that an ai--hole?" Mrs.
Ellington ventured to TX.
"Air-hole nothin'. It's a ventilator
ow III show you how to use that
rev and bulb Observe"
Mr.. Ellington threw back his head
ice more, and this time to some pur-s
)se. Whether II was the knitting
sedle, or the screw, or the big bulb.
one will ever know; but with the
ventors first satisfied swallow the
ass broke away. and in one wild
'urt pint of milk few into Mr.. Pill
1gton's face and down his shirt
ont.
"Gl--g -gl-f-gf--o spluttered
e unfortunate. Stop your idiotic
ughing, Maria Ellington. Why did
II make me put In that air.hole?
ell, II that isn't just like woman,"
And Mr.. Pillington went off to get a