The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1909-12-12

dozen hard faced old danes, leading
meek and henpecked husbands. These
turned out to be a delegation of aggres-
sive suffragettes, demanding "Votes
for women in strident voices. Sew
eral noted men among tho diners were
called upon to declare their positions
on this momentous question, to the
great amusement of the company. Fl.
nally- the president of the club decided
against the women s claims. whereup-
on they announced their purpose to
participate in the dinner and were only
driven away through q threat to feed
them after the British fashion, through
the medium Of a gigantic stomach
pump.
"The Battle Royal was a mirth-
provoking stunt. Members of the club,
clad In regulation ring outfits repre-
sented "Battling Nelson, the Rhode
Island Terror" "Achilles Ballinger.
the Siwash Sirocco;" ''Giff Pinchot,
the Fighting Lumber jack" "Joe
Cannon, the Danville Bantam" and
Herb Parsons, the Candy Kid"
Before the miX-up, which was very
realistic, the cautious referee discov-
cred concealed in the gloves of the
gladiators various articles, such as
Jumps of coal, axes, knives, pieces Of
steel and the like, calculated to in
lict mortal damage upon some of
them.
Some Jokes on Taft. f
President Taft's projected visit TO
Alaska formed a subject of humorous
comment and great solicitude was
shown for his comfort, and to make
sure that his dietary would conform 10
his simple tastes the proprietor of the
hotel where he is to stop was called
upon to state the Viands to be pro.
vided. The list of dishes and methods
IL z
many good natured Jokes at the eX-
pense Of the prominent guests. One
man who wanted poached eggs on toast
heard his order translated into cone
Cook and Peary on n raft. - Captain
Archie Butt, who ordered hash with
red peppers and tabasco sauce, was as
founded to hear the chef acknowledge
it as Zone order OF Roosevelt s poll
cies.' Attorney General Wicker
sham's demand for deviled Holsters
with the claws removed, got TO the
kitchen as cone busted trust and
'FOne Uncle Joe" was the response
to the suggestion that the president
would like some "possum. What
the general opinion was of the presi
dent himself was muscally set out by
the Gridiron Quartette in song. q
verse Of which ran; (The tune being
II love my wife, but oh, you kid.'O
Now Roosevelt once was President,
Oh. yes. he was
But Mr.. Taft now runs the Job,
Oh, yes, he does.
Roosevelt now has gone hunting,
Shooting with his. might and main;
So the politicians sing
This musical refrain;
Chorus:
We love, we love. we love Roosevelt
But, OH you Taft;
He's gone away TO Africa,
Ia To
lie said he would come back again,
And thereupon we laughed,
We love we love, we love Roosevelt,
But. oh you Taftl
Big Crouch Voiced.
Then the correspondents voiced their
crouch against news conditions under
the present administration as compared
with that preceding. Messages were de-
livered TO the representatives of press
associations and leading newspapers
complaining of the dearth Of Washing
ton news worthy Of first page headlines
and asking why the President was not
giving congress fts,' as had been
customary for the past seven years.
There were also wild telegraphic de-
mands for details of the Roosevelt con-
spiracy, that could not be met,
The souvenir Of the dinner was q |
" gridiron dream book the production
of the club S special seer, 'EProf. Wooz
ingtou Wiz Flamboyantly bound its
decorative scheme utilized along with
the mystic gridiron various symbols of
the uecromancer s art Proceeding on
the theory that the interpreter Of
dreams should take into consideration
the circumstances and temperament Of
the individual, the favorite dreams of
various guests were mentioned and
their signifcances explained. There
was also IN oraculum and book Of fate,
by means Of which fortunes could be
told and the sciences of physiognomy
and palmistry were not neglected H. |
lustrations in caricature frightened the
pages of the volume and occasional bits
Of verse interspersed. Despite its
whimsical and irresponsible purport,
many of its deductions were admitted
to bo marvelously accurate.
Among the guests were President
Taft, e-President Sherman. Speaker
Cannon, Secretary Ballinger, Secretary
Nagel, Postmaster Hitchcock, Chief
Forester Plnchot, Senator Newlauds.
Marquis of Villalobar, the Spanish
minister; General Clarence II. Edwards,
u, s. A; Charles 8. Diehl, Chicago;
Crawford Hill, Denver Republican.
JACKIING TALKS AP0JTT