Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1909-06-25
Percy and Harold
They Visited the County
Fair but Didn't Enjoy II


stump between them was a can Of
coffee, from which they alternately
drank, and close by was a bundle of
cold-hearted sandwiches they had
begged along the route.
How extremely fortunate we were.
Harold" remarked one of the tramps,
picking up piece Of the dry bread
and raking a roasted potato from the
fire, "in securing the services of our
| French chef. Since he has had charge
Of our kitchen our table has been the
envy of all our society friends, and
hear the Wally de Geezers said they
never more thoroughly enjoyed din
ner than at our last weekend"
We'll, l should just guess they did,
Perc," was the fiippant interjection of
Harold, who was wading deep into the
layout They must have thought 1t
was politicians day at the almshouse
from the way they tanked up on the
grub. I'll bet a hundred that Wally
gained 10 pounds before he left the
table, and as for Mrs. Wally-"
Don't, Harold! DON'T" interposed
Percy, with a Mortified expression
You distress me dreadfully You
should be more guarded in your
speech with reference to our guests. l
will admit that both Wally and dear
Mrs. De Geezer did eat very heartily,
but | rather regarded 1t as a compli-
ment to our Incompatible Henri. Isn't
this pomme de terre julienne exquis
lite? 1t is positively the best l ever
tasted, and as for these haricot
vert
Henri is all right" responded Har
old, clawing another piece of bread
from the bundle, but l wish the dod
blasted chump would smear more but
ter on these sandwiches. They are
almost as bad as the sandwiches you
get at the quick lunch foundries where
they think that butter comes from
the Klondike. Chuck us over that
coffee CAM"
you are positively insufferable
Harold" protested Percy in a voice
that was almost fearful How you
would shame me by your vulgar re-
marks If we had heard you use the
term coffee instead of demitasse?
Coffee will do very well for the ordi-
nary people, but you should consider
your station in life and speak accord
ingly. l trust you will remember this
in the future and also be more cir
cumspect in your manner"
mo, thank you, dear boy" said
Harold, arising and picking up his
hat when he noticed that Percy had
annexed the last crust of bread and
the last potato. Il don't care for it.
In fact, have been too well served.
Since we have no engagement for to-
night, think | will smoke this cigar
stump which my friend Algernon 80
kindly tossed from his automobile,
and then retire"
AS soon as it was dark the tramps
started for an adjacent barn, but
when they arrived at their destina-
ton they found that the cautious own
er had locked all the doors Outside.
however, was a large wagon, filed
with loose straw. and into this they
quickly crawled. Ten minutes later
they were fast asleep.
On the following morning they were
awakened by the sound of ragtime
music and merry voices, and crawling
out of the straw, were astonished to
find themselves at a county fair.
Percy glanced at Harold and Harold
glanced at Percy, and then a rude
farmer broke into their society.
What in Their thunderation are
you dod-blasted hoboes dom in tibet
straw" demanded the farmer person.
Cant bring load O beddin' ter Their
fair fer the race horses without cartin'
around a lot of gosh-hanged tramps?
l s'pose ye thought we would hide in
tibet straw an git in without payin',
but"
Pardon me, fellow" haughtily In
terjected Percy. You are unneces-
sarily agitated We had no intention
Of coming to the fair, nor do we now
have any desire to remain and mingle
with a people who have no place In
our exclusive set. 1t Is only by the ac-
cident of chance that we are here, and
If my friend Harold will give me his
arm we will retire at once. AS for the
term 'hoboes that you applied to us,
l will have you understand that"
Go wash your facet" brutally
broke in the farmer. Eye look a derned
sight worse than hog what has root
ed all the way across a ten-acre lot.
guess | know what ye sneaked In
here fer, an now that ye are here
we've got ter stay. be gosh! an work
yer way out. Sam, take these skeer-
crows in hand and make 'em clear out
Their stables an carry water fer Their
bosses all day. If they git gay, souse
'em with a garden hose"
The person addressed as Sam was
only too willing to have additional
help, and all day long the hoboes were
compelled to clean out stables, carry
water and rub down race horses.
When evening drew apace they were
liberated, and lost no time hiking for
the nearest woods.