davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
THE ELBE RIVER.

How the Stream Was Brought to an
Even Slope and Current.
In the beginning the Elbe, like any
other river. wandered at its will, now
spreading out among a multitude Of is
lands, now narrowing into short and
crooked turn, now widening over a
shoal. AS a proper beginning for the
correction Of this sort of thing the
Prussians, in true German style, pre-
pared map of the stream as 1t was,
decided by a simple mathematical cali
culation how wide channel 1.5O me-
tiers deep at middle water could be
with the existing flow and then upon
the map in red ink, eliminating all
sharp turns, drew in graceful curves
and long straight reaches regardless OF
the existing banks two nearly parallel
lines. Indicating the banks as they
were intended to be.
The engineers began at the head OF
the stream and built out from the old
shore to the location of the red line
transverse dikes, ground sills-ordi-
nary contraction works. Sometimes
where they seemed to be needed they
built long parallel dikes exactly on the
new red line. Sometimes they wove
hurdles and revetment mattresses OF
willow brush, much as we do at home,
and sunk them on bars between the
tips of the transverse bikes. and then
on the top of them set up upright
sticks and wove waffle" or basket
fences of willow through them to make
pens, and into these piled sand dredg-
ed from the stream, to build up the
shore. Mile by mile they advanced,
dredging the river or letting it dredge
itself, leaving no ends loose to rayel
out, gradually reducing the river to an
even slope and current.-Boston Tran
script
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
THE HUMAN RACE.
viii Man Simply Shrink OFF the "a


viii Man Simply Shrink OFF the Face
OF the Earth9
A French statistician who has been
studying the military and other rec
ords with a view of determining the
height of men at different periods has
reached some wonderful results.
He has not only solved some per-
picking problems in regard to the past
of the human race, but is also enabled
to calculate its future and to deter
mine the exact period when man will
disappear from the earth.
The recorded facts extend over near
Iy three centuries.
1t is found that in 1910 the average
height Of man In Europe was LIS me-
tiers, or, say, five feet nine inches In
1870 It was five feet six inches. In
1920 it was five feet five inches and
fraction. At the present time 1t is
five feet three and three-quarter inches.
It is easy to deduce from these figures
rate Of regular and gradual decline
in human stature and then apply this.
working backward and forward, to the
past and to the future. By this calcu-
,ation it is determined that the stature
of the first men attained the surpris-
ing average of sixteen feet nine inches.
Truly, there were giants on the earth
in those days. The race had already
deteriorated in the days of Og, and
Goliath was a quite degenerate OF
spring Of the giants. Coming down to
later time, we find that at the begin
ming Of our era the average height OF
man was nine feet, and in the time of
Charlemagne it was eight feet eight
inches. But the most astonishing re-
suit Of this scientific study comes from
the application Of the same inexorable
law of diminution to the future. The
calculation shows that by the year
1000 A. D. the stature of the average
man will be reduced to fifteen inches.
At that epoch there VIII be only lilli-
putians on the earth. And the con-
clusion of the learned statistician is
Irresistible that "the end Of the world
will certainly arrive, for the inhabit-
ants will have become so small that
they will finally disappear finish by
disappearing" as the French idiom ex
presses it-"from the terrestrial globe"
London Tit-Bitg
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
ESTABLISHED 1875

ana faugh. but no one else could see
where the Joke came inf there was
a joke.
For two weeks after the robbery Of
the hardware store there was nothing
doing. The colonel held to 1t that the
boy, fool though he was, had become
frightened. Then the grand climax
came, and 1t was hair raiser. There
was a private bank In town, and the
owner had quietly put on Waterman
One night this Waterman heard sus-
picious sounds at the back door and
raised an alarm and heard some one
running away. Fifteen minutes later
there was the awfulest kind Of row
in the rear of the hotel None of those
who rushed out were prepared for the
sights that greeted them. Colonel
Bliss. without his clutches, had been
caught by a leg In bear trap, the
town fool was rolling on the ground
In laughter a mans trail over the
roofs could be traced in the thin snow,
and there were tracks leading from the
trap back to the bank. Jimmy Landon
had suspected the man that whacked
him with crutch and set trap for
and caught him. There was no getting
out of it for the colonel. First, it
was shown that he was no more a
cripple than any one else, and. Sec
ond, the plumber Of his various rob
berries was right there In his trunk.
He simply stood on his dignity and
went to prison for ten years, and the
town fool Is still today welcome to
make his home with any family In the
community. The doctors say that his
mind will never be any brighter, and
other folks say there is no need for 1t
to be
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23

baIk the fire. Her horse stumbled in a
gopher hole, regained his poise, blum
dered again, and she was thrown to the
prairie.
"Jimv' she cried.
The flames were upon her now. He
slid from his horse, gathered her In his
arms. holding her face close to his
breast to shield her from suffocation,
and staggered across the safety line
with the angry flames turning to a
sullen, dead red, as If crying out male
dictions on her rescuer for depriving
them of their prey.
'Jim, JimI" she shrieked in her de-
irium. Suppose l had lost your
There was a rapping at the door.
Consciousness slowly returned to her;
she shook recollections of the night
mare from her.
whats the matter, Edith Are you
hurt"
mo; I'll be out in minute. Wait"
And she hastily dressed.
you're ILL.," he exclaimed when she
appeared. you are ghostly pale"
"Oh, Jim, I've had such a dream"
she said.
dreams are silly things, Edith.
Surely you would not let one brighten
your he soothingly said.
But this one did. And. Jim, know
now" and her head dropped to hide
the flush of her cheeks.
"Yes?" said Jim, not comprehending.
"What you asked me yesterday"
Sweetheart! And your answerT He
eagerly ran to her.
Eyes, Jim, l love you" And in the
embrace that followed disappeared the
artificialities Of troublesome philoso-
phies in the depth of an emotion primi-
tive and elemental.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
AN UNWASHED PRINCE.
The Lesson That Ended His Kicks
About Morning Baths.


About Morning Baths.
When Emperor William II. was a
small boy he had a strong objection to
being washed in the morning, and his
governess. having had some unpleas-
ant experiences with him and being in
some doubt as to what she had better
do. appealed to bis father, the then
Crown Prince Frederick Frederick an
swered, 1.-THE next time he gives any
trouble on this score leave him alone
to his own pleasure and report to me-"
Naturally it was not long before the
young prince refused to go through
the publication process, and the gov
erness followed the orders received.
Now. the boy had a little carriage
and was very fond Of driving out In
the morning, and he generally ordered
the coachmaa to go by way OF the
Brandenburg gate, as It amused and
fiattered him to see the soldiers In the
barrack. Just inside the gate, turn out
and present arms as the heir to the
empire passed their quarters. Accord
inelv on the morning of his disoDe-
dience the order was, as usual, 10
the Brandenburg gate" and the car
rage rolled rapidly thither. But what
was the amazement and the rage OF
the princeling on arriving there to see
no soldiers except those on guard, and
they took not the slightest notice or
him. In a towering passion he ORDER
ed the coachman to return to the pal
ace. where, rushing into his fathers
room. he complained Of the indecent
behavior of the guard and demanded
their condign punishment. :.
But his father only smiled and SAID
in the gentlest voice: "Fuer unge-
waschener prinz wird niemals praesen-
tirt'' c'An unwashed prince Is never
saluted'D.-Harper' Weekly.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
Won Through
a Dream.
Copyrighted, 1909, by Associated
Literary Press.
By GRACE BOWEN.

q IltSrdFy EIcS6- y
*.+a**#*s+*+sts.*.s**.A.*4.s.s.s
In a lonely shack on North Dakota
quarter section Edith Allen was facing
the problem that comes to all of Ewes
daughters.
A man great in his strength and
mightier in his love had asked her sur
render-had almost demanded it when
he passionately tore aside convention
al conversation and barred his heart
and his hopes.
That she had sent him away without
an answer was not negative reply to
his wooing She had begged for time
to think, a space in which to analyze
the emotions surging in her breast.
Moreover, she half thought she loved
him, and because she was product of
the city and had dug deep in the print
ed philosophy of life she wanted her
brain to sit in judgment on her heart
81 know what you would say" i'm
periously declared Jim, the lover. 81
am nearer the animal than you. When
fatigue follows satiated Joy Of work
ing my recreation is metaphysical
comfort and sleep. find nothing to
grip me in books written by men
whose lives have been cramped and
narrow, by men with water in their
veins instead of strong, red blood"
mo, no, Jim; it is not that" inter-
rupted Edith.
"But it is. 1t is just that. You
know. am a college man. Not from
one of your famous eastern institu-
lions, true, but fancy our North Da-
kota brand of education will be found
the equal of it's older relations of New
England 1 went to please father. He
was a poor man and felt that he had
missed much because his school days
had been few. That his son need not
suffer this handicap in life he made
many sacrifices.
"T am grateful to him for the love
that prompted this self denial, and l
am glad that l have what learning l
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
GOT AHEAD OF PITT.
The Ruse by Which George Ill. Out.
wltted His Premier.

The Ruse by Which George Ill. Out
wltted His Premier.
On Jan. 10, 1905, DR.. Manners SUIT
ton. bishop Of Norwich, was giving a
dinner party in his Windsor deanery
when his butler informed him that a
gentleman wished particularly to see
him. but would not give his name.
"Well. 1 can't come now in the mid
die of dinner" said the bishop.
"Beg pardon, my lord, but the gen
tIeman is very anxious to see you on
important business" and the butler
was SO urgent that the bishop apollo
gized to his company and went out.
The gentleman who would not be de-
MED proved to be King George III.
"How dye do, my lordY' said he.
"Come to tell you that you're arch
bishop of Canterbury-arc archbishop OF
Canterbury. Dye accept-accept? En-
eh?''
The bishop bowed low in token OF
acceptance.
AN right" said his majesty
you've got a party-see all their hats
here. Go back to them. GOou hlSht'
Next morning Pitt appeared at Wind
sor castle to inform his majesty that
Archbishop Moore had died the day be-
fore and to recommend the bishop Of
Lincoln, DIR. Pretyman, for the vacant
primacy.
Every sorry, very sorry, indeed
Pitt" said the king, "but / offered it to
the bishop Of Norwich last night. and
he accepted. Can't break my word"
Pitt was very angry, but the deed
was done, as the king meant it should
be. and so DIR. Manifestation became
archbishop of Canterbury and held the
great office for twenty-three eventful
years.-Alichael McDonagh In Cham
bers' Journal.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
Her First Cure.
By EDNA BRITT.
Hst4.4.ssats..s..s..a..s..l..aa..k.t.te..a.
By EDNA BRITT.
Copyrighted. 1909, by Associated
Literary Press.

y
There were hoarse cries from the
hurrying tarong, groan Of horror and
then a rush toward the spot where a
dusty, huddled heap lay in the road
way. The white faced driver refined
In his horses In response to the threat
ening demand of the cooler headed
among the spectators.
Presently blue coated figure pressed
through the throng, to emerge again
and hurry toward the police box.
Then an ambulance came, and the
crowd gave three cheers for the doctor
when It was seen that it was the new
woman inferno Of the Emergency hos
pital, and they watched with interest
her handling Of her first case.
"Women doctors are more sympa-
thetic than men," commented one man
to another as they noted the relief
with which the slender white clad wo-
man announced that the man was not
badly hurt. "a man doctor would
bundle him into the wagon and rush
him off to the hospital and cut off his
leg soon's he got him there"
The other nodded wisely, and then
as the patient was slipped on the
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
hia Dinner ouests.

In volume published in London,
"Piccadilly to Pail Mall" there is this
queer anecdote of the vagaries Of So
cial life in the capital: Some years ago
an eminent parsonage accepted or sug
gested dinner with certain million.
aire, at that time comparatively IN
known. The first guest to arrive, hay
ing explained to the butler that, being
unaequainted with his host, he would
wait till some one else came who could
introduce him, fingered In the hall.
The second was In the same predica-
ment, as were the third, fourth, fifth
and other guests up to the ninth, who
CHANGED to be 1.-The eminent parsonage
himself. Upon the dilemma being ex-
planned to him he cheerfully said: "Oh,
come along with me! l will introduce
you all. I know him."
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23

"It's FOR Kathie's sake" he told him
self as he wrote an invitation to Miss
Weygant and note to Kathie to re-
port his progress. Both girls smiled
over their notes, but from wholly diff
ferent causes.
In the weeks that followed Katherine
was busy with the ambulance calls,
but not too busy to follow the progress
Of her special patient, and she was
not at all surprised when one day the
jubilant announcement of an engage
ment was made over the telephone.
"NelI and 1 are awfully obliged to
you for curing me-" explained David
jubilantly. ''Your first cure was quick
and complete, Kathie."
'I'm a homeopathic" explained the
smiling girl. Like cures like, you
know"
"And causes liking" suggested Da-
vid as he hung up the receiver and
turned to the blushing girl who stood
beside him.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
A FIRE IN JAPAN.
The Victim Has Other Troubles Be-
sides Loss of Goods.

The Victim Has Other Troubles Be-
sides Loss of Goods.
An American missionary living in ia
pan recently lost his dwelling by fire.
He described in an amusing way the
polite condolences which his neighbors
showered upon him. eve were del
uged with visiting cards. he says.
'@They were forced into our hands by
sympathetic inquirers, friends offering
aid and tradespeople soliciting orders.
The conversation with each conner was
somewhat as follows: You have in
deed had an honorable disaster says
the friend. 4 have humbly caused a
great disturbance l reply. Please
honorably excuse me- Indeed, it is
honorably sad for you the friend an
sWers. 4 have done an unheard Of
thing 1 say. I am overcome that you
should have come to call on me on
purpose. Thank you very much
Please honorably excuse me for being
so late in coming says the friend.
The energy required for such a CONVEX
eation can be imagined by accompany
ing each sentence with low bow
and repeating the process about fifty
times.
about 10 o'clock we two foreigners
escaped to face our next duty, which
consisted in apologizing to all the
houses in our section-about fifty. 1t
was nearly IL o'clock at night when
our apology tour was completed, but
our last visitor called at 2 o'clock In
the morning. Callers began coming
again at 9 o'clock and kept on coming
steadily. During the day we received
many visitors and paid twenty eight or
more calls. The strain Of all this, to-
gether with our other tasks, including
the receiving of the stream of visitors,
which lasted a whole week, Is better
imagined than described.
"All day after the fire and for three
days more people from all over Gifu
and from out-stations kept bringing
sympathy from their families and pres
ents Of cakes and fruit and other arti-
cles. We can never repay all the kind
ness we received Chicago News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
Time to Go.

81 wonder how many Of those con-
nected with newspapers" said re-
porter, remember the famous dis
patch sent by a press telegraph oper-
ator at the time of the San Francisco
earthquake. 1t was the only smile
raiser in the whole horrible catas-
trophe. 1t read something like this
THE building is beginning to rock
bricks are falling about. and it's me
for the simple life.' Then it trailed
off as If the operator had scooted for
the open door, or wall. perhaps. Thls
dispatch was handed about the news
paper offices and made all the boys
laugh In spite of the serious picture II
called to philadelphia Ledger
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
sARDou AND THE SPIRIT.
The Dramatist Wrote and Drew Pic
lures While "UnGer Control"

The Dramatist Wrote and Drew Pic
lures While "UnGer Control"
Before he made his reputation by
writing plays Victorien Sardou, the
French dramatist. who was deeply in
terested In spiritualism, had remark
able experience in taking dictation.
He had been interested in occult phe-
nomena, and by chance he came into
communication with a spirit person
atty who signed himself Bernard
Palsy" M. Sardou told the story of
his experiments in an article entitled
"Only the Blindly Ignorant Scoff" in
the Delineator. He said:
One day in my room with two
friends / thought l would make the
little table where we had taken our
coffee run about the room, as ! had
often done when alone. Without say
ing anything l put my hand on the
table, but it would not bulge. tried
in vain all the time they were there
to make it move, but to no avail. As
soon as they were gone could make
it do what l pleased, even jump clear
off the foor. So ] took up my pencil
and asked, But why would you not
make the table move while my friends
were herer The hand which held the
pencil wrote. "They were too stupid"
Shortly after this 1 was sitting by
my table one day idling, dreaming, not
making any effort to do anything In
particular. All of sudden my hand
began to work on the paper before me
with a rapidity and precision which
astonished me. And it kept this up
for close to two hours The result was
fantastic piece of work drawn in
delicate lines, fine almost as a spiders
web. and at the bottom signature
Bernard Palsy" what is it?" /
asked.
And my automatic hand wrote, The
house of Swedenborg, on the planet
Jupiter" This was considered as most
curious by all my friends, who knew
that personally / had no aptitude for
drawing. A plate was prepared, and
/ was given an etching tool The re-
suit, in the same order of design, was
more elaborate piece Of work, thit
time curiously combined out Of all
sorts of musical terms, clefs, notes,
bars, and so on, and the whole was des-
ignated as the house of Mozart, also
on Jupiter, and the whole was again
signed Palsy" In fact, Bernard
Palissy became my almost constant
companion from this on, like my Sec
ond self
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
Clown DOGS In Demand.

There are dogs and dogs, but not al
dogs are fitted for clown work in the
circus or dog and pony show. Clown
dogs are a source Of great amusement
with the children, and when pup is
found which has keen sense Of the
ridiculous he Is the one for the saw
dust ring. Sometimes pups of no par
ticular breed are found which I'll the
bin for harlequin roles, and the circus
man is glad to get them. When a hu-
morous dog is small and agile he Is In
great Chicago News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
H.+s !. Ala. 70 Matrimony.

sThe wise woman is as careful about
the choice CT a hat as she is about the
choice of a husband" The celebrated
author who uttered this dictum may
have exaggerated little, but not
much. And allow me, woman, to
tell you solemn men whom see sneer-
ing at the 'frivolity" of my sex that
often the cleverest among you chooses
a wife for no better reason than that
the woman thus selected has herself
chosen a becoming hat!-Mme. Q. De
Broutelles in Grand Magazine.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23

"Some mis'bul sinner took an ruined
off wild de collection hat las meetin'
day" said Brother Dickey, IAN l wei
knows dat eff dar wus no SIGH place eS
hell de good Lawd would make enc
for dat sinner"
"Was there much money in the hatr'
mo, sub; day warn't so much ez a
brass button in it,
"Then why are you SO mad about 1t
'sHit wuz my hat" he said.-Atanta
Constitution.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
p
/ The Town Fool.
/ BY M. QUAD.
Copyright, 1908. by t. c. McClure.l

By NJ. QUAD.

1t was a brutal way Of putting 1t,
but everybody in the town Of Graham
had come to speak of Jimmy Landon
as the town fool. 1t was said that the
boy had been born bright enough, but
at the age of five stroke of lightning
had worked the change In him. He lost
the power Of speech, and his mind
was weakened, and after the death Of
his widowed mother he was an inmate
of the poorhouse for two or three
years. Then he became hanger-on
of the town, having no particular
home, but being cared for as an OBJ
ject of charity. Not quite that either.
He was always willing to do any work
he could to pay his way. He could
hear If he could not talk, and, though
he seemed to have no more mind than
a child of three, he got along very
well. Two things the boys Of the
town came to learn in time-Jimmy
had a streak Of cunning in him, and
he was revengeful.
Jimmy Landon was thirteen years
old and had been looked upon as the
town fool for several years when a
sort of event happened in the quiet
community. A stranger, who called
himself Colonel Bliss and who was so
crippled up with wounds that he had
to use a pair of clutches, arrived in
town and delivered series Of lectures
on war. 1t came to be understood
that he had been the colonel OF d gal
liant Illinois regiment and that owing
to his wounds and other misfortunes
he was In bad financial shape. He did
fairly well with his lectures, and he
made many friends, and when he pro-
posed to open a singing and writing
school he received much encourage
ment. He could sing, and he wrote
beautiful hand
The colonel took up his quarters at
one of the two inns In the town, where
he had the use Of the hall used for
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
1...o.. Eor cannibaIism.

According to a writer in French
review. there are three causes for can
nibalism. It is due either to necessity
pleasure or fashion. Twenty per cent
Of the cannibals, we learn, eat theiT
dead to honor them. The ancient II
betans belonged to this class. This is
sentimental anthropophagy. Nineteen
per cent eat their great warriors to
obtain their courage. This Is deslg-
mated egotistic anthropophagy. Tween
ty-nine per cent eat human flesh tc
punish their enemies and 80 per cent
because It is the fashion or because
thew consider the flesh savory.-ln
dianapolis News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1909-02-23
s..kinn RsIisf.

Darky boarding a train)-I heard
bout youth wife dyin', Jim. Whar yo'
gwine nowf
"I's of to join de Mormons. Hit
keeps one woman hustlin' too much
to support a heavy eatah lax me-