The Montgomery advertiser., 1909-02-20
DRIFT WOOD

Wonder if Louisville properly ap- preciates the kind offer of Goverpor Glenn of North Carolina to so to that city and act as mayo rto enforce pro- hibition law ''or put every man. woman and child in jail2''
 hanged onIWashington's birthday will not be hanged until February 2e. This must be an awful lot of comfort to the negro. 2e
 The New Orleans Marai Gras is in full swing. In the hotels; people are presume as usual.
 The fleet is less than zoe miles off the Virginia Capes and putting on full steam to reach home in time for the inauguration.
 Mir. Taft is now 8 Mason. After be- ing duly initiated, he had the extreme satisfaction of witnessing the discom- fiture of another candidate. he can't hear ali the rotten "pOetry'' written about him.
 Mir Taft calls for team work" in tno next A1C Wtkk UE the tongue to the old executive, wagon. however. we presume.
 Johnson avows that he is eager to meet Jeffries 'fn any part Of the
 The richmond Times-Dispatch says. then Texas loses all chance of. Eet-I ting the mill" fte 4. 5r.,.> IF
 Congress, seems to have been trying gain counter sort of Secretary. of State. This being the case, 1t should have been no trouble to have secured them in job-lots.
 Don't think for 6 minute that all the. bright men live in the north. Phil Armstrong of The Montgomery Adver-i tiser has discovered that 'the young man in sowing his wild oats uses a great deal of rye."-Lncoln (Neb.) State-JournaL
 No douht the fact that many of the 1urymen in the Cooper trial cannot read will save them from many a ruds shock. Where ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to get wise.
 Since Upton Sinclair has announced that marriage is tragedy we cant help, but wonder what Mrs. Sinclair has to say on the subject.
 
 When man starts house keeping in a flat he is in decidedly tight post tion no matter how much money he has.
 Talk about a triumphant smile, If you want to really observe one notice the features of a farmer as he drives past a six-cylinder automobile stuck in the mud.
 Aho,,4 z aoo oats v,ara shtnnad to Japan from this country the other day: Had you observed a subsistence of your back-fence concerts. at night9
 Vice President Fairbanks is to plant 100 acres of his California ranch In grapes and the rest in oranges Sure ly there will be small plat reserved for cherries?
 Mir Taft came near breaking the Solid South in some towns-fipancial- ly we mean. for those fancy dinners must have cost fancy price.
 
 It is indeed a rude shock to our sen- Washington was only six feet, 9 inches. We always imagined he was at least nine feet high.
 During each month for the last two years 21.0O0 Russians have entered the port of New York. How much of the port of New York has entered these Russians isn't stated but at $4 bottle, 1t entered only the richer class we presume.
 Montgomery isn't going to be out done. She couldn't give 'possum din- ner to MT. Taft. so she Is going to catch a 'possum and serve 1t up to Brother Torrey
 The Lord said "1et there be light" but He. didn't say '1et there be light fiction"
 The saddest sight in the world is to see beautiful Montgomery blonde with false hair and false heart.
 When man has been married a wife giving him piece of her mind as he I sof her givng hi ma piece of her pie.
 Superb funerals at $4s finer fun erals at s75. elegant funerals at S1oO," Sounds entlcing. but we had rather be live one in Montgomery than a dead one in Baltimore.
 Give Us Novelty.
 We're getting tired of Teddy Bears And Billy Possums too.
 Let some bright chap toy devise That's novel and brand new. A combination elephant And Democratic donkey, A toy that's non-partisan
 With which both sides can monkey. 'Tis but a faint suggestion- Inventors please get busy And your name shall be writ SO high
 Twill surely make you aizzy ,.s