Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1909-04-17
THE TRAGEDY
OF BEING
TWENTY-EICHT.
BY STUART B. STONE.
Copyrighted. 1909. by Associated
Literary Press.


Colonel John Andrew Findlay was
staggering young dog Of sixty, and
Mr.. Thomas. his son. was as old as
twenty-eight.
The colonel had proposed just eight
times to Miss Edwina Lincoln, his de-
lightful little scampergrace Of n
wealthy ward. whereas Mr.. Thomas,
being all Of twenty-eight and extreme
ly serious. would never have dreamed
Of the thing.
The colonel began the business when
Miss Edwina began to stick up her
chestnut hair. as do young ladies when
they attain delectable sixteen. The
colonel. though fifty-five at the time.
had nothing to his credit in the way
Of discovery. invention or production;
but. then, the colonel did not stop for
a little thing like that
IL know I'm old explained Colo
mel John Andrew, and Miss Edwina
interrupted:
you're not-you're not oldw she
cried in heated denial, for they were
comrades OF years and had enjoyed
many great times together.
"Then." said the colonel, optimistic
as Old King Cole, you will have me
Edwina. when you are little older"
Edwina laughed and half cried, in
formed the colonel that he was II dear
old classmate of Methuselah and end
ed up by kissing him. while he patted
the newly heaped lady hair. After
that Edwina sought out Master Thom-
as. pottering about his maze Of a
mathematical theory.
"How old are you. Tom?" she asked,
though she knew like A B G.
"Twenty-three." answered Tom So
berly as he went on figuring. "Twen-
ty-three," he repeated, with solemn
look at Edwina. perched upon a table
of messed formulate. Getting older
every day, Edwina. and nothing to
show for the years" He gloomed at
her like Jupiter displeased, and she
went out and dimmed her big brown
eyes with tears.
The colonel continued to entertain
the fondest. rose tinted hopes, which
he carefully announced as often as
possible. Miss Edwina persisted in be-
coming more entrancingly lovely day
by day. Tom went on working over
stupid figures And when Edwina. ra.
diant and beaming with the glory Of
another year east behind with the de-
spised gildings Of childhood. came to
announce her seventeenth birthday the
colonel proposed again. He couldn't
help it-dear soul. Edwina tweaked
his nose. pulled him an ethereal little
kiss and scampered from the room.
by the eternalw murmured Colonel
John Andrew when she left him with
his hands still In the attitude of dra-
matte pleading. Now, wouldn't she
and make pair Of high steppers
in the beauty show on the avenue of
evenings" Then be t!r.ced over TO
an old trunk and looked for long
while at the picture of a kindly. faded
lady In locket.
Edwina had gone to the library.
where she lolled upon desk covered
with gay equations In algebra.
"Ton." she asked softly. did you
know l was seventeen
Tom nodded. Yes, know, Ed
wilma. I'm keeping track Of these
things"
Tom she persisted. and he ceased
his calculations and turned his dark.
solemn eyes on her.
"Tom." she asked ''are you ever
do you expect ever TO get marriedT
Tom blushed and turned away to his
papers. ~ am twenty-four. Edwina,"
he declared In slightly trembling tones.
"and I~have achieved nothing. How
could think off,
He stopped at that, and Edwina slip
ped up TO her pinkish boudoir and
wept softly for perhaps Ave minutes.
When Edwina ripened into a charm.
ing eighteen and after the colonel's
third fervent proposal the light In her
brown eyes. the gold brown CLINT Of
her hal. and the note Of her clear
young voice became topic here and
there. and wooers could no longer be
held back from the threshold.
The colonel eyed them balefully, then
slapped them on their young backs
and adjured the best man to win.
Master Tom. with the tragedy Of twen-
ty-five. six and seven bowling his hand.
some curly head. worked with hts
noxious mathematics and worried over
the respective merits of Edwina's
army OF signing Romeo chaps
And Edwina coquetted, mercifully
as possible. with the whole idolatrous
band, refusing Colonel John Andrew
as often as twenty times a month and
extending delicious sympathy to Mas
ter Tom in his struggle with Old Time.
the scytheman.
OF course the time had come when
Edwina became all OF twenty -one and
unhampered mistress of really re-
spectacle fortune. The event WINS sig.