davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16

st MAKE THE wlTrIEsT REMARKS"
If I sit down to write a verse that's
trimming DER with glee
It turns out to be serious, though
why Icannot see,
And if, upon the other hand, my
musings would be sad
My readers read it and they smile
as if it made them glad.
WHENE'ER meet woman who
" is bright enough for kings
And try to talk I cannot think Of
aught but stupid things,
But when I have vis-a-vis at din
ner dull and slow
I make the wittiest remarks, though
she would never know.
When I was but baby had not a
baby face.
I looked the most all knowing kid
of an all knowing race,
But as I neared maturity a change
came over that.
And now I look as innocent as any
pussy cat ss,<Gi,aAlsussAs
a ND people, when they see me
"A anywhere, are not impressed
With the idea that I've a mind
that's different from the rest
Of ordinary minds they meet, wher-
ever they may be.
But that is not the thing that's
most distressing unto me.
The thing I hate the most in all my
weary span of life
Has happened to me since wed my
tender little wife.
She's tender, and she's pretty; but,
by lingo. in my house
She rules the whole establishment
whilst I'm nixcumarouse.
N OW. why is it, I wonder-what
~ accursed freak of fate
Has settled me in this extremely
notifying state!
Why is it that. whate'er I try to do,
despite my wit.
The thing that truly happens is its
very opposite7
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16
The BRIDES FIRST
CHRISTMAS.

- RRS. JOHN VINCENT HAIR
II" RIS entered the big depart
1V Dent store and seated her
self at the nearest counter.
mo, nothing, thank you" she said 10
the solicitous clerk. IL just want to
make sure | have my list with me. II
is so difficult TO shop at this time OF
the year, and IL is always difficult 10
find anything for one's-husband. Yes,
/ suppose many people did their shop
ping earlier. but ! didn't have him
then. ] mean
why. you sell neckties, don't you ?
How fortunate! They are on my list.
No. | don't think of any particular
kind. but something for a tall man.
He is whole head taller than You
say a four-in-hand? oh. l am afraid
he couldn't tie that. but you might
give me a two-in-hand Thank you;
that is very pretty, but il is blue. He
doesn't like blue. or course you
couldn't know that Not that one.
Why. my papa wears them, and he is
lots older. Yes. that one will do.
Mr. Floorwalker. where are the col
lars? Thank you. (She approaches
the counterJ You, please-are you
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16

busy? l want some collars for my
husband. Oh. are these ladies' collars
How stupid. told that man distinctly
/ wanted collars.
cat the right place. Are husbands
collars here? Well, | am glad | have
found the right place at last. Size 2
You clerks always ask so many ques-
tons. | never bought any before, be-
cause we've been married only No.
his neck isn't very large. Why. | can
reach But he has real broad Shout
ders. How nice you are TO think of
that! Yes, box Of assorted sizes
would be just the thing. Some Of
them would he sure TO be right, and
could cut the others off-that is. if they
were not too small. You'd better put
in nearly all large sizes. You see, |
am starting out as economical as |
can be. think it must be so discour-
aging for a man to have woman
spend his money on frivolous things.
Now. as was coming down the street
l saw a big sale of hats-men's hats.
They had been in the window and
were a little soiled, but | found such
a nice clerk, and be said IL I got some
of that 1910" soap it would make
them look like new. Mr.. Harris v
very particular about his clothes. He
won't wear trousers unless they are
pressed. SO | bought three Of those
hats. Don't you think they will last
him long time and save money?
''Mr. Floorwalker, where are the
gloves? Gentlemen's? Well. l hope
he is. Why. he is my husband. Oh, |
see what you mean. Yes, | want them
for Mr.. John Vincent Harris. Go
glove salesmanJ Now. don't ask me
what size | want. Not too large and
not too small I should think you
would learn some of the different sizes
so you could tell people. Holding
out her handJ It's lots larger than
that. You think | wear a 6? Well,
then, you'd better give me II for
him, for he can hold both my hands in
one OF his. Are these q special sale
Isn't 40 cents cheap for all that kid!
Mine cost 50. No, don't think he
will want more than two or three
pairs. Now for the hose.
On the women's hosiery Department.
Are you busy? | have so many other
things to get. please hurry. | just
want to know where the other kind OF
hose are. It's for my husband. Thank
you. CAT the mems hosiery counterJ
| want to get hose-not like these.
but The size? Oh. about fifty feet.
Why. of course I want IL longer than
a man. I-I-you don't understand.
1t isn't this kind I want. No. nor la
dies either just want hose we
can both use. Mr.. Floorwalker, may
! speak TO you?
THAT clerk isn't bit nice. and !
think you ought to punish him. No.
he wasn't exactly impudent. but he
Thank you. have had so much trou-
BILE to find the right kind of hose. |
want long-no. I've been to that coun-
ter. | want one fifty feet long. You
see. we are thinking Of moving to the
country in the spring. and we shall
want to water the yard. oh. ought
to have asked for the common garden
variety?
Now I think I have everything on
my list except cigars. and | may as
we'll go TO a cheaper place for them
because John Vincent Harris always
gives away all that ! buy for him. he
Is so generous. Chicago News.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16

% IL VIII
OdIuCS VI All NllUO There this
Pasme Puzzles Farmer
Iase Lark, Dooh Cattle in Harness. "Cauo Cat
Wedding
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16
Looking Ones Best.

It's woman's delight to look her
best but pimples, skin eruptions, sores
and boils rob life of JOY. Listenl
Bucklen's Arnica Salve cures them:
makes the skin soft and velvety. 1t
glorifies the face. Cures Pimples, Sore
Eyes, Cold Sores, Cracked Lips,
Chapped Hands. Try it. Infallible
for Pilef. 25c at c. F. Browns.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16

Ring out. wild beIlsl' a poet sang
Ring on" was Kissed into his teeth.
Those same wild bells the poet rang
Who wore old Albions laurel wreath"
The poet paused him In his path.
Quite angered Mt the sudden check.
TIL ring those bells" he said In wrath
'or else I'll ring your scrswny neckr'
T. SAPP, JR.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16
Sure Sion.

II Is one sign Of age when your
friends in looking around for a Christ
mas present for you search for some
thing that Is useful. - Atcbson Globe.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1909-12-16

There's but one remedy for me, and
now that it is here,
This very first of all the days of all
the glad new year,
I'm going to try it; I'll swear of
essaying for to do
The things think I ought to and
try what I oughtn't to.
-Harper's Bazaar.
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30
FURTHER CLEANING UP
OF CRIMINAL BUSINESS
Three More Subjects BiIIeted For the
Penitentiary.

Ephraim Richards, who had been
convicted of burglarizing ware house
of the Mesa Bakery company, was
yesterday sentenced by Judge Kent to
three years in the territorial prison
Charles johnson and James W. VIII
son for burglary got two years each.
j. E. Clarry, who had pleaded gull
ty to ENFORCEMENT, was given an in
determinate sentence which was sus-
pended Garry being required to re-
port to the court on October l. There
had been a hearing in open court the
day before to determine whether Clar-
ry was worthy of the leniency of the
court
In the case of Martha Hauser
against Emil Hauser, the plaintiff
was ordered to show cause on May 8.
In the matter of D. p. Stewart and
others against George W. Cowgirl, the
plaintiffs were given judgment in the
amount of s633-33. This is a claim
for rent of a building occupied by the
Braun Ferguson Drug company. a
wholesale concern which had operated
in Ell Paso for some time and had
then suspended.
Mr.. Cowgirl had been a manager of
a wholesale drug firm which had
originally leased the building which
was subsequently occupied by the
Braun Ferguson company. The
whole matter hung on the character
of the lease. 1t was the contention
of the defense that the lease had
been assigned to Braun Ferguson
company while the plaintiff contended
that there was no assignment clause
in the lease and that the Braun Fer
guson company was merely a sub
lessee, the original lessees thus being
held responsible for the unpaid rent.
This view of the case was accepted
by the jury
The greater part of the afternoon
session Of the court was devoted to
arguments nthe defendants motion
for new trial in the case of Jepp
Ryan and others against Tevis and
MKittrick involving mining proper
ties in Cochise county the plaintiff
having been given Judgment for S275.-
600.
Today there viii be a meeting of
the supreme court to pass upon mo-
tons for rehearing in thirty-three
cases.
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30
Do YOU WANT YOUR
CHARACTER READ FREE2

If so, send sample of your handwriting to The
Arizona Republican postal card. Ask any ques-
ton you like You will receive delineation of your
character free Of charge
The Exalted Mystic Rabbom the Psychic Pamist,
has arranged with The Arizona Republican to give read
ngs for its readers and subscribers Your reading will
be published in this paper from day to day You can
sign any you wish. This handwriting feature is
very interesting and amusing and instructive Send in
your postal card with your handwriting at Ad-
dress your card like this Exalted Mystic Rabbon
of Arizona Republican.
This feature will only last two weeks, ending May
IL Private readings will not be given in this paper.
The Exalted Mystic Rabboni has his private office at
No. 10 North Second avenue
Look in this paper for his advertisement.
Following answers from the postal cards that
submitted to the Exalted Mystic Rabboni:
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30
AFTER THE MERGER
ROADS NEGLIGENT
OF THE NEEDS OF THEIR PA
IRONS.
Testimony at the Salt Lake Hearing
on Pacifics Combination.

Salt Lake. Utah. April 29-In the
hearing of the suit to dissolve the
merger of the Hartman lines, ]. w.
Summerhays, a wholesale wool and
hide dealer, testified that when he
wanted to make a shipment over the
Denver and Rio Grande he was unable
to get a car set out on his switch for
three or four days but an order for
the Oregon Short Line was filled i'm
mediately,-
Mr.. Summerhays also testified that
a gradual evolution of rates had fol-
lowed the merger of lines in 1901 and
that competition had practically ceas-
ed. He also testified that wool could
be shipped from points south of Salt
Lake to Los Angeles and thence to
Boston cheaper than via Salt Lake to
Boston
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30

Thursday. The following district Off
GERS were present: Rev. Allen Ken
nedy, district templar; Mrs. George NJ.
Brockway, secretary; Rev. w. H. Sal
yer, treasurer; c. V. Gulley, d. c.;
Mrs. Kate Brooks, d. V. T.; Rev. P d.
Gardner. d. p. T.: Miss Laura L. 1r-
win, .. S. J. T.
Delegates from lodges at Douglas,
Copper Creek, Williams, Cartwright,
Florence. Tempe and Phoenix were in
tendance, and other lodges sent re-
ports. The most noted parsonage pres
ent was Col. F. ]. Sibley, representa-
tive of the international lodge, who is
one of the leading business men of
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30

7. J. Hesser-Your charm and per-
sonality is felt wherever you go.
HARRIET sRoWN-You are loved
by all
GEET MENcH-You build too
many castles in the air; you boast
too much.
MARIE-You have great love and
tenderness
HA. HA. HER-Your lady friends
are all giving you the laugh because
they have found out that you are a
married man.
JESSIE BETTS-You are sympa-
thetic and magnetic.
MAR. EEL. ToUGH-You are
making love to the lady clerk in your
store. She will soon find out that
you are a gay deceiver-
PED lENclL-The watch that you
have at present belongs to your wife,
Rachel You intend giving it to
Mildred, don't do it, your mistake will
find you out.
LOUISE LAw1ENcE--You are a
very clever person.
OPERA GlASS-You are false to
your gentlemen friend, John, and
George let them know that you are
a married woman.
x. Y. z. B.-You will soon take
long journey, you will enjoy it.
KNIFE sLADE-You are a colored
person and your name is Maurer You
gamble too much.
sALLIE sNooKs-There is not
any trouble ahead of you.
TO. BACK, oH-You have buried
your money by the stumpIof the tree
near the cellar. Get it at once. be-
cause Joseph saw you put it there.
MADGE-You are of a strong dis
position and constitution.
MARGARET sMITH-You should
cultivate cheerfulness.
ITS DooLITTLE-Your Judgment
is always good.
WINSOME VlNNIE-You have
long and happy life before you.
HERBERT BAXTER-You would
do anything for the sake of peace.
MAY G. H.-You dislike quarrels.
BUSTER BRoWN-You have
restless disposition.
VIRGINIA WILsoN-You are self
reliant.
L. S. Po. 7e3-Don't be so skeptical.
M. c. Po. 7s3-You are aiming
high.
GEORGE THoMAs-You are some
what austre.
ANNIE BIAck-Perseveran is
well shown.
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30

DIMPlES - This person denotes
strong individuality.
NJ. 3. p. c. D.-You are stage
struck. Don't go on the stage.
FLUFFY RUFFLES-You will yet
reach the height of your ambition
GOLDEN TEXT-Your partner has
your deed to your mining claim. ne
has stolen it from you.
CHARLIE BoY-You are easily
tormented.
BASHFUL MAN-Your wife and
child is coming to you in days.
Leave the dark complexioned girl
alone, don't deceive her.
ERASTA-You delight in joking.
PRosPERITY-You must not pay
so much attention to your star Doard-
er, he is a married man.
eIPs-You have considerable ex-
ecutive ability.
EN-. VEL. oPE-Charles is about to
give you up. He has another sweet
heart in Prescott.
TURTLE DOVE-You will go to
any end to accomplish your purpose.
RUB Der BALL-You have scar
on your right leg caused from a bull
let that your wife gave to you with
her gun three years ago.
J. D. A.-Your domestic life will be
good.
LOCK LOVE Xx-You drink too
much, you should look out for your
family.
Po. TEL. cARD-Don't gamble,
you are wasting your life and time.
ELEANoRA WIeeINs-You will
be on top Of the ladder some day.
MRS. L. cLARA-You were born
under a lucky planet
IN. DEL. AsLE-You have never
known your father and mother in the
past, both were colored persons. .
ELVA EVANSTON win soon
make change for the better.
COTTON HEAD-You will find
that lost mine soon.
JEAN sTEADMAN-Do not let
any one discourage you.
CUT TACKS-Look out, for there
is some one around you that is steal
ing.
ELENoR SINcLAlR-Keep on as
you are doing. you will be lucky.
OIL CLOTH-Yes, Lillian loves you
very much.
FRANK DEMLAP-You will sue
coed in your present venture.
SANDY WATERING-You are too
much of a Dirt
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30

Arizona, as seen in the fact that he is
president and general manager of the
Copper Creek Mining company, first
vice president and general manager of
the Minnesota Arizona Copper COM
pany. president of the Pioneer Auto
Manufacturing company of Tucson.
and leader in other business enter
prises.
Nine new members were received in
TO the district lodge and good reports
We're received from various local
lodges.
The next regular meeting win be
held in Tempe, September 2S, when a
large attendance will be expected, and
a popular program with a view to
highly entertaining and strongly i'm
pressing the public will be rendered.
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30
NOTICE OF ELECTION
In School District No. 48, Maricopa
County, Arizona Territory.

/ IN Scnooi District No. 48, Maricopa
County, Arizona Territory.
Pursuant to a resolution Of the
Board of Trustees in and for School
District No 4s, Maricopa County. Ari-
iona Territory, duly passed and adopt
ed on the third day of April, A. d.
1909, calling the election hereinafter
| mentioned.
Notice is hereby given that an cleo
ton win be held at the Scottsdale
School House, in Maricopa County.
Arizona Territory, and in said School
District No. As. on SATURDAY., the first
day of May, 1909. between the hours
of 8 O'Clock in the forenoon and 4
o'clock in the afternoon of that day.
That w. z. Kimsey, NJ ]. Hayden
and V. A Vanderhoof are the judges
appointed and named to conduct said
election at said time and place.
That the purpose of said election is
to submit to the taxpayers Of said
School District No-4S, in said Maricopa
County, Arizona Territory. whether or
not the bonds Of said School District
No. As shall be issued in the aggregate
sum of five thousand dollars in denom-
ination of $500 each bearing interest at
the-rate of per cent per annum and
to run for twenty years after their
Issuance.
That the proceeds of the bonds here
in proposed to be issued will be used
and devoted for the construction of
one school house and supplying same
with furniture, necessary apparatus
and improving the grounds thereof, in
and for the use of said School District
No As.
NJ. ]. HAYDEN,
E. o. BROWN,
V. A. VANDERHOOF.
Board Of Trustees for School District
No. 4s, Maricopa County, Arizona
Territory.
Dated office OF School District No.
4S, April third, 1909.
Arizona republican., 1909-04-30
THE GOOD TEMPLARS
IN DISTRICT LODGE

Quarterly Session Held in Baptist
Church Yesterday.
The Arizona district lodge of the
International order of Good Templars
met in quarterly session at the Bap-
fist church in Phoenix, at 10 am.
rmyUzpsS
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-06-01
AJTOISTS HAVE AN INNING
Motor Parade, Followed by Races,
Witnessed by Several Thou
sand Persons.

Ideal summer weather yesterday was
the means of bringing thousands of the
residents out TO the parks and the near
by resorts, all of which have now opened
for the season. Throughout the day the
street car lines were very literally pat
rOuized and extra equipment was needed
to handle the crowds. The Canyon and Fair
Grounds lines handled the largest crowds.
The feature of the day was the auto
mobile tournament and races at the fair
grounds under the auspices Of the Ogden
By more than five thousand people. The
program was varied, interesting, excit-
ing and humorous.
Before the races a parade with about
sixty beautifully decorated automobiles,
headed BY q band in an auto, was given
on the principal streets of the city. After
the parade N the city the autos went
directly TO the fair grounds, where the
program for the afternoon was carried
out.
The-feature of the day was the race
in which Jensen's Cadillac, Cortez's Max
well and Duffin's Buick were entered and
which was won by Jensen, who went ten
miles in 1917. The match race between
Jensen and Duffin was won by the for
mer.
c. Dodd Of Salt Lake City, in 7o-h. p.
Thomas Flyer did an exhibition five
miles in 7;12 Joe Beaumeisuer won the
five-mile race from DR.. OsgOod in 10:5212.
Archie Browning won the slow race from
pursuit race between William Glasmann
and Judge Howell, the latter caught the
formers car in the second mile. In the
five-mile motorcycle race W. s. Stewart
was first, Roland Thomas second and
Glen Tout third. The time was $50.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-06-01
REVIEW OF TESTIMONY PUTS BRIDWELL
AND HIS CROWD In INEVITABLE LIGHT

ne board Of education will meet this
- Siilhs ana after transacting its regular
BUSINESS VIII resume the hearing of evil
1si ts INTO the conduct Of the department
al al oqlGihSs and grounds, Of which George
NJ bIldWell is superintendent. and Ar
lloIo u. Glauque chairman of the gov
erhlng committee The evidence is now
iii iy ali in and probably another meet
RIs Mil Ilnlsh the investigation, unless
MI BfldWell and Mr.. Giauque desire to
introduce evidence to offset the showing
records
At the last meeting it was shown that
many schools were closed on account OF
inadequate heating and there was other
evidence OF bad janitor service. There
was an almost incredible number of these
enforced holidays the worst being in the
school of which Chairman Gfauque's son
Is Janitor. Mr.. GiauqUe at once attacked
the records of temperature of the schools
as submitted, impugning the veracity of
the principals Of the schools who had
sent them in.
Bridwell has also to explain why he
Kept $5l. 70 turned in to him by H. W.
Nichols when that gentleman had re-
celVed MS pay twice. Mr.. Nichols says
Ihat ne repaid the money to Bridwell,
VINO told him to cash the check, saying
the board owed him that much.
Various Irregularities.
The investigation has turned up many
and various sorts Of irregularities. 1t has
been shown that the system of bOOkkeep-
ing used by the superintendent would put
to the blush the old jack knife and
notched stick. and that the time of the
men was kept in the most haphazard
manner and in some instances by the
men themselves
It was shown that Bridwell had nine
relatives on a payroll of only about fif-
teen men, and that these In some in
stances drew double pay.
It was proved by Bridwell himself that
bogus names appeared on the payrolls in
dozens Of places, and the only excuse was
that this was done to help out w. J.
Newman, a member of the board. One
of the assumed names was that of Bird
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-06-01

wells son. It was shown that Bridwell
paid the men by personal check when
ever he pleased and that it was some
times weeks before they received their
on time from the board and had the use
of it meanwhile.
1t was further proved that Bridwell
kept on the payroll tribe of incompe-
tent Newmans, even though there were
complaints about their work and it was
necessary to do some Of their work over
again.
There was evidence last week that the
trees cut at the High school grounds went
to the house of W. J. Newman for fire
wood, and there is a strong presumption
that employees of the board took them
there and stacked them up for the mem
Der from the Third ward.
Birds of Feather.
Three members of the board are lined
up sOlidly on the side OF BridWen A. q.
Giauque, member from the Second
ward, Is head Of the boards committee
on buildings and grounds. and is to some
extent on trial himself The evidence
showed that he had son on the payroll.
an incompetent janitOr. He knew all
about the bogus names and other matters
lieVed to have done cement work for the
board in the name of his foreman, Green,
to the amount OF many thousands of dol
lars. GiaUqUe is a cement contractor.
W. J. Newman, member from the Third
ward, is the man who prOfited directly
by BridweIrs irregular acts. He is the
father of the numerous brood who were
on the payroils under various aliases, and
he received firewOOd from the schools
when trees We're cut down.
c. s. Martin, member from the First
ward, has also been strong in defense of
the superintendent He, too, has profited
by his connection with the board. 1t is
a familiar sight about the schools to see
coal carts bearing the name of the &C
s. Martin Coal company" discharging
fuel. and it is estimated that he furnishes
fully half Of all the coal used. As it is
done under the cloak of another firm he
cannot be reached legally.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1909-06-01
Ben Hur Tonight at Salt Lake Theatre

The climax Of the dramatic and lit
erary season is what is promised in the
appearance Of Montaville Flowers in a
series Of interpretative recitals at the
Salt Lake theatre this week It will
be a great delight to amusement lovers
20 know that the opening attraction
will be the thrilling story of ben
Hur." There has been quite a demand
for seats for this number, and Mr..
Flowers will be greeted by a large and
enthusiastic audience. OF Mr.. Flowers
presentation Of this play, General
Lew Wallace said: 1T was a most ex-
cellent arrangement Of the story, and
Mr.. Flowers displayed splendid judg-
ment in his adaptation. It meets with
my hearty approval. He presents the
scenes and incidents of the plot in a
charming manner. and his work is by
far the best I have ever heard. It is a
revival Of the ancient eastern custom Of
storytelling. It is a recreation of a
lost art"
OF special interest to the music lovers