davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
Hahner and "Lock-Up" Tree.

wanderlust Hahner has achieved a
reputation second to none.
For years this Jersey hamlet was
pestered to death with the most varie-
gated assortment of tramps and anna
teur handout artists that ever wor-
ried women into losing their naturally
angelic dispositions. The pies that
mother made were no longer safe
when set out on the back porch to
cool off They disappeared like magic
Likewise. the yeliow-legged spring
chickens, s,ved for the preachers spe-
cial delectation, were swept from the
roost in evening hours. When the
situation got desperate the women Of
the village called in body one day
on Hahner and demanded protection
for their erstwhile happy homes.
Hahner's excuse has been that, lack
ing Jail facilities there was little use
in placing the offenders in the tolls
of the law. So he had been content
to chase them away with yelled
threats. Then it was that he devised
tree lock-up' whose efficacy has
been demonstrated to such an extent
that fame has come to this town and
tramps that used to infest the place
give it wide berth
Hahner ordered an extra supply of
handouts and some of the tramps
caught in his next raid were chained
to trees in the village street The ex.
pertinent was an astonishing success
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

and worried himself nearly to death.
but there didn't seem to be any way
In which he could get value received
for the dollar he had spent for the
lap-dog.
Then, just when he had reached the
lowest depths of worry, Uncle Ashod
Clute suggested something that
cheered VIII up again and made him
as happy as of yore, and the next
thing we knew viii was packing his
goods in boxes and laying in time
tables. And the funny thing, SO he
said, was that he hadn't thought OF
1t before. So he packed his belong
ings. and had them shipped to the
Junction, and bought new suitcase.
and bought a ticket to Salt Lake City.
In talking it over with us he said he
saw plainly enough that no one lap
could ever be big enough to hold that
Belgian lap-hound, even as 1t was
now, and there was no telling when
it would stop growing. SO the only
thing to do was to secure an exten-
sible lap, on the principle of sec
tional bookcase, that could be added
to from time to time to meet require.
ments. He said he was going to Utah
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
A FEW REMARKS FROM PAPA
Quiet, But Emphatic, and Young Thing
Immediately Took New
View Of Life.

An Atchison Young Thing had a
head that ached, her honey boy having
taken his affections elsewhere. and
her father recently shut himself up
with her to reason with her. That
Honey Boy averaged spending 80 cents
a week on you." he said. Here's a
dollar a week to take its place. Every
time he called he cleaned out the re-
frigerator, your mother will see to it
that your brothers do this in future.
He kept you up late nights. Your
baby sister is cross, and hereafter you
will let the baby do this for you. He
took possession of the most comfort
able rocker on the porch; when you
look at that rocker In future it will not
be empty, bringing the pang to your
heart that your silly novels tell about;
it will be occupied by the man who
paid for it, and that's me. Your moth
or and | stayed by you through collie
and teething. and we are going to get
you through this il we have to take
turns spanking you. Now. take your
eyes off the moon and look at the dust
around you'-Atchison Globe.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
PAINT DURABILITY.

The first thought In painting should
of course. be durability-and dura'
bility means simply pure paint pr 'p'
erly applied. Pure paint is pure
white lead and linseed oil with or
without tinting materiaD.
Some years ago the paint-buyer was
likely to get adulterated or counter
felt white lead II he was not familiar
with brands. To-day he may buy
with perfect safety If he only makes
sure that the. Dutch Boy Painter
trademark is on the packages OF
white lead that he buys. This trade
mark was adopted by National Lead
Company to distinguish the pure
white lead made by them from the
worthless adulterated and fake goods
1t is a guarantee as valuable to the
house-owner as the education OF q
paint expert could be.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
Early to Bed.

OF his life TO go to bed at nine O'Clock
usually gets rich and is always reli-
able. or course going to bed does
not make him rich-I merely mean
that such n man will in all probabil-
ity be up early in the morning and
do a big days work, so his weary
homes put him to bed early. Rogues
do their work at night. Honest men
work by day. It's all matter of
habit and good habits in America
make any man rich. Wealth is re-
suit of habit.-John Jacob Astor.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

hams Vegetable Compound is the most
successful remedy for all kinds Of
female troubles, and feel that 1 can
never praise it enough. ."-MRs. LIZZIE
HOLLAND, Noah, Ky.
The Changeof Life is themostcritical
period of a woman's existence, and
neglect of health at this time invites
disease and pain.
Womeneverywhere acknowledgements
that there is no other remedy known to
medicine that will so successfully carry
women through this trying period as
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound, made from native roots and
herbs.
For 80 years it has been curing
women from the worst forms of female
ills s-infammation liberation, dis
placements. tibroid tumors, irregulari-
ties, periodic pains, backache, and
nervous prostration.
If you would like special advice
about your case write q cOnfiden-
tial letter to Mrs. Pinkham, at
Lynn, Mass. Her advice is free,
and always helpful
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
HER PRESENCE A PLEASURE
Subtle Compliment Evoked by Caller
with Courteous Airs and
Manner.

Some of us would be more surprised
than pleased if we knew the impress
sions we make on the minds of those
who know us only slightly. How many
of you girls are remembered as pleas
antly as was the lady described in the
following incident?
A lady called at the house of a
neighbor on an errand; but, as the
family was away, she asked the hired
man to tell his employer that she
would call again. Being in a hurry
and not thinking but that the man
knew who she was. she did not leave
her name. The lady of the house re-
turned before the rest of the family
and the man told her that lady had
been there who said she'd call again
who was it," inquired Mrs. II.
"Oh, don't know her name," re-
piled the man.
But you should have asked her,
said Mrs. H., so we would know who
had been here. Can't you tell me
something by which l can know who
came? Where does she live?"
don't know" said the man, but
she's the one that always smiles when
she speaks"
The pleasant look and the courteous
manner in which the lady had spoken
to the servant had been noticed and
remembered. leaving a sunbeam In
that mans heart.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

moneys worth, and as soon as he
paid for the dog he took 1t home and
began tapping 1t. as you might say.
He sat down in a chair and put the
dog on his lap. but VIII is so bow
legged that the dog fell right through
his lap onto the floor. He tried it
eight or ten times, and then he de-
cided he didn't have the right kind
of a lap to hold dog on, but he was
not going to waste a dog that he had
paid a good dollar for, and the only
thing he could see to do was to get a
lap that would hold the dog properly.
and the more he thought about 1t the
more sure he became that what he
needed was female lap with skirt,
SO the dog couldn't fall through. So
he thought it over well, and he de-
cided that Miss Daisy Plunkett would
do. She was small-sized person.
and about right to hold small lap
dog.
VIII Finch found right then that
1t takes longer to get female lap
into the family than to buy lap
dog. but he was thoroughly aroused
about it, and he went right to work
courting Daisy, and he had just got
to the point where he was ready to
propose when he happened to look at
the dog carefully, and he was all ta-
ken aback The dog had grown a
lot, and was as big as good-sized
coach dog Will saw Immediately
that Daisy Plunkett wouldn't do at
all-she didn't have nearly enough
lap to hold such large lap-dog.
So Will went about town for a
week or two studying the height and
breadth of all the minated ladies of
our burg, and at last he decided that
Sally Ann Scroggs was about the
rangiest limbed he could find. and
that she would fit the dog pretty well.
and he started in to court her for all
he was worth, and by and by she be-
gan to incline his way a little. and
he was just on the point Of propos-
ing when he happened to study the
dog again, and he saw right off that
Sally Ann wouldn't do. The dog was
as big as Newfoundland by that
time.
Well, VIII was nearly broken up
over it. He couldn't think of lap in
all Betzville that would be big enough
to hold lap-dog the size of New
foundland. and yet he hated to think
that he had paid good money for a
lap-dog that couldn't be Tapped. 1t
was like wasting the money. First
he thought he would write to New
York and get in communication with
an agency that handled Hur.--.n Curl
osities; he thought he might be able
to find a Human Curiosity that ran
mostly to lap. but he hesitated. He
could not be sure the Belgian lap
dog had stopped growing. and he
hated to go to the expense of marry
ing Human Curiosity only to have
her lap soon outgrown. So he moped
around, and got thinner and thinner,
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
MARRIAGE and Meanness.

Some years ago there lived in Atch-
ison Il young woman noted for her
good works and gentleness. She was
always helping the poor and was pa
tient and kind and universally ad-
mired. She married fairly good man
and abused him within three months.
She had been good and patient for
years. but husband was too much
for her: she had never been cross to
any one until she was cross to her
husband. There is something about
marriage that stirs up hidden depths
of meanness on both sides.-Atchison
(kan) Globe.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Mrs. Capitola Adams, married, d.
vorced, and remarked, though only
twenty-five years old, drank carbolic
acid at her summer home at Column
bine Lake, mile and a half west OF
Grand Lake. She died without ex.
planning the reason for her act Her
husband, Roy Adams. salesman and
former stamp clerk in the Denver
postoffice, is said to have nearly lost
his mind, and attempted to take his
own life, when he saw his young wife
of six months die in agony. Mrs. Ad-
ans is said to have been in poor
health and to have brooded over the
death Of a relative in Chicago. But
this is not supposed to have been the
only cause.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

When Greeley man who conducts
a fruit stand purchased some tin jew
elry for 80 cents about two weeks ago
from Charles Williams, a negro from
Cheyenne, he did not know he was
receiving $3.50 worth of gold and
gems. This morning Lieutenant
George Mason of Fort Russell ap-
peared, with Marshal Williams. and
laid claim to diamond ring, stick
pin and some other jewelry. Williams
had been arrested in Cheyenne and
had confessed to the theft of the val
uables. The negro was employed by
Lieutenant Mason and departed from
Fort Russell about two weeks ago. He
came to Greeley and while there sold
all of the articles for 30 cents. The
ring, valued at $105, was sold for 5
cents. Lieutenant Mason refunded
the 80 cents and got back his pos
sessions.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
THE CAMERAS USE IN WAR
New Invention Which Discovers Sc.
crets Of Forts and Army Man.
euvers Creating Excitement
In Europe.

New York-ln these days Of unset
tied political conditions among the
European nations, all new inventions,
which may be useful in war. are
awaited with an eagerness only
equaled by the undercurrent of dis
trust and suspicion that prevails ev-
erywhere. The latest invention makes
it possible to take photographs in the
air at heights varying from $50 to 400
yards.
Military Europe is excited over the
experiment in aerial photography that
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
A noble Love.

"Is the contract of dover properly
drawn up, signed and witnessed?'
asked the count of Castle-on-the-Bum
Yes" sighed Gladys Golden.
There are no loopholes through
which your wise lawyers of Philadel
phia might creep?"
Not loophole," said the fair
Gladys.
And your fathers holdings in Anal
gamated Whalebone American Cheese
and Macaroni and Tin Soup-Plate 6s
have not been affected by the recent
depression"
No, dearest" answered Miss Gold
en-, firmly.
Then | love you," said the noble
count: and two fond hearts beat as
one.-Puck.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
Lack of .IlIdnn,enf

80 Cayuse Charley met his fate
at the hands of posse?" yep" an
swered Three-finger Sam. What was
the trouble?" His immejit difficulty
was lack Of judgment as to speed
He helped himself to horse, but
didn't pick one that was fast enough
to keep ahead of the party as went
after him."
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

For years l was
weak and run down,
could not sleep, my
limbs swelled and
the secretions We're
troublesome; pains
were intense. | was
fast in bed for four
months. Three doc
tors said there was
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
CHAINS TRAMPs TO TREES
New Jersey Constable Devises "Loek.
Up" That Is Terror to Weary
WiIIies.

Delanco. N. 1.-THE good house
wives of this locality have risen up
as one and called blessed George F.
Hahner, constable, Pooh Bah" and
regulator of the morals of this model
village. AS a terror to evildoers and
various stray persons afflicted with
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

no cure for me, and | was given up to
die. Being urged, used Doan's Kid
ney Pills. Soon was better and in a
few weeks was about the house, well
and strong again"
Sold by all dealers. so cents box,
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo. n. Y.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
Shake Into Your Shoes

Aliens Foot Ease, a powder for your feet.
1t cures painful. swollen, smarting. sweat
ing feet. Makes new shoes easy. Sold by
all Druggists and Shoe Stores. &c. Don't
accept any substitute. Sample FREE. Ad-
dress Allen S. Olmsted. Leroy. n. I.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
UNDER A DARK MOON.

Dolly-The motor boat is superior
to the canoe even If we do have to
carry chaperon.
Dick-I should say so. The "chug-
chug" makes such racket she
couldn't hear smack to save her.
self"
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
An ESQ ape.

Are you sure that indicator regis
tered the correct fare?"
Yes" answered the taxicabman.
You aren't kicking, are you?"
NO, I'm congratulating myself If
we went that far in so short time we
were mighty lucky not to get arrested
for scorching. g.'-Washington Star.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

William Benton. who is working the
Tom Rayburn farm near Greeley. lost
half of his field of eleven and one
half acres of oats In shock when n
spark from a Union Pacific engine
set 1t on fire. He managed to save
half his crop by the hardest kind OF
work. This means a loss of $500.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
T he Air.

He-So you think married life
ought to be one grand, sweet song?
SEe-Yes.
He-What air would you prefer for
this matrimonial song?
She-l think millionaire.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Booker Washington didn't reject
Pugilist Jack" Johnson's $40 contri
button as tainted. Evidently these
colored pastors have lot to learn
about sensationalism.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Dorando. the footracer. has bought
an Italian villa with the money he
made in America. Evidently Make
hay while the sun shine" has been
translated into Italian.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Scientists say the air is SO light in
Mars that fat man can jump 20 feet
there. The pedestrian evidently has
some show of escaping from the Mar.
tian Joy rider.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Why not have the next "construc-
tive warfare" in Colorado? Give the
army mule a chance to show his abil.
ity as a mountain climber.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
GETTING at the Root.

Fair Patient-Oh. doctor, I'm posi-
lively all run down ard I al 30 miser.
able, have that tired feeling all the
time.
Physician-No doubt. Let me gee
your tongue.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
kfterOlc "

Arc you still in the blissful intox-
ication OF love-"
NO, I've reached the headache
now. Exchange.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

MIR. Wellman will be home about in
time to merge his excuses with those
OF the managers Of the losing base
ball teams.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

neduacneS. nervous
prostration, and
hemorrhages.
Lydia f. Pink
hams Vegetable
Compoundmademe
well and strong, so
that l can do all my
housew work, and at
tend to the store
and post-otlice, and
Ifeel muchyounger
than 1 really am.
UT.vflia T. piDk
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
A Little Detail.

Miss Jay has such large ideas
about everything-such broad tolera
tion-such big heart! tell you
there is nothing small about that
woman"
NO, nothing but her size"
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

The announcement that Alfred Aus
tins new book will be prose ought to
help its sale considerably.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Lame back and Lumbago make a Young
man feel old. Hamlins Wizard Oil makes
an old man feel young. Absolutely moth
ing like it for the relief of all pain.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
AND NO WONDER.

"I don't know why you moved. my
dear. Your house was close to the
golf links"
Il know; but I found the children
were learning such bad language"
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Fame may come to a man suddenly
and go just as quickly.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

When you hear one man trying to
beiittle another, it's safe to bet that
the other is his superior
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Our idea of wise man is one VIII
never argues with a woman.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

BEST
REMEDY
For Women-Lydia E. Pink
hams sVegetable Compound

Noah, Ky. -"Iwas passing through
the Change of Life and suffered from
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

Mrs. Windows Soothing Syrup.
For children teethng, softens the gums, reduces IN
nammation allAys palm cures Wind coils. 25c bottle
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

And occasionally man throws of
trouble by putting on bold front.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

1t is the after effect of experienc.
that counts.
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03
eED-eouND FOR MONTHS.
Hope Abandoned After Physicians
Consultation.

Mrs. Enos Shearer, Yew and Wash
ington Sts., Centralia, Wash, says:
The Springfield herald., 1909-09-03

PERRY DAVIS PAINKILLER
A feeling of security comes by having This famous
remedy ON hand. 1t is dependable" safeguard
again cole dilrrhel cramps. z5c, sc 5Oc bottles
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-07-09
SIMPLE.

Tha Baltimore SIM gives the Amer
lean citizen something to think ABOUT
when it says: THE President has
been ust-busting' for seven years,
and if any private citizen in this
whole broad land has received any
benefit from his excrtions-if the
price of any one trust-made article
has been reduced by the trust
busting which has SO delighted the
country then the market reports dc
not disclose the fact. Naaman, the
Syrian, rejected the prophet receipt
for curing his leprosy because it was
too simple. 1t was only to wash and
be clean. He demanded something
spectacular. He wanted Elisha tc
come out to him and stand and cal
upon the name of the Lord and
strike his hand over the place. And
so the real cure of the monopoly that
is affecting the country is too simple
to impress the public. What is
monopoly? 1t is the absence OF
competition. Then why not, in the
name of reason and common sense
take down the bars and let competi
tion enter? A great fine NAV be
imposed upon the Standard Oil Com
pany. But what will that avail!
1t will simply result in higher
price for oil, and so the people viii
lose instead of finding relief in that
kind of trust-busting.' If the SUI
gartrust is exacting an unfair pric.
for sugar, why not let the German
reilnerlcs compete with them? L
the tobacco trust maintains higl
prices why not let Cuba compel,
with it? This is not only too simple
but it would be too effective. Tn,
people who are standing pat on tn,
tariff do not want the trusts curbed
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-07-09
Fur Product OF Maine.

Maine fur hunters sell about 80, =
600 fox skins out of the State every
year. The price of good fox skins
reached the highest notch last win
ter, even red pelts commanding from
S4.3O to s. each. rs against So 30 two
years ago, and - 30 five years ago.
For silver grays, which are rare, and
blacks, which are very rare, prices
remain very much as former years,
though the rates have advanced
somewhat, and the market is much
steadier since the close of the war be-
tween Japan and Russia, as nearly
all these expensive skins are market
ed in Russia One foXskin in 200 is
from cross" fox. and is valued at
$50; one in 10000 silver gray, and is
worth from $500 to $500, and perhaps
one in 500, 900 is a pure and radiant
black, which may bring $500 or even
l.500, thus making the coat of the
black fox the most valuable garment
worn by any animal on top of earth.
Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1909-07-09
NOT FOR CITY FOLKS.

The Fourth of July is not for the
city except as getaway day. When
did you ever hear of Il special rate
excursion 10 a city to attend 4 4th of
July celebration? The people of the
country do not want to come into
the city, and the people who live in
the city do not want to stay at home
With the rising of the sun, the flags
are a-tiutter. and perhaps somewhere
in the back streets there are the in
fernal bang bang OF the tirecracker
and the fierce report of the torpedo.
But the masses are crOwding the
ears. rushing for the trains and
scurrying for the steamers at the
docks. provided the city is not in
land, and autos are already far away
In fact big percentage of the city
population generally gcts ont the day
before.
The night Of the Fourth is more
patriotic than the day Many who
have remained indoors all day as
semble on the stoops to witness the
miniature illuminationS and rocket
displays of somebody who has taken
it upon himself to amuse the people
in the block. There are real patriots
in every section of the city who wait
for the night of what the orators call
the natal day. Illuminated balloons
chase each other across the sky.
These have become noticeable fea-
lures of the Fourth in the city.
Who sends them up? City patriots.
Fortunately the passing of the
Fourth in the city is as sudden. If
not more so, than the dawn. BY IL
! % clock the noise is over. Trains
bearing the returning crowds are
back in the great sheds long before
that hour, and those who have been
out of town are glad to Scurry to
shelter und get rest.