The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1909-02-11
VOICES GO BY oPPos1rEs.
The Little Fellow Always sings Bass
in Quartet.

In n Quartet.
A large part Of Kansas City's popu
lation is made up of embryonic Caru-
SOS, who hope to overcome the handI-
cap of not having been born near the
Tiber and to do things to grand opera,
the Kansas City Times says. Follow
ing the lines OF least resistance, they
try to sign papers with a quartet Be
ing in their very title rather restricted,
those who can't join old quartets band
together In groups Of fours and make
quartets OF their own. Thus, owing 10
the increasing numbers that are con-
stantly awakening to the impossible
possibilities Of their vocal chord equip
ment, the musical market always at
fords large assortment Of quartets.
Never since the day the first quar-
tet broke its shell has there been a
quartet in which the several quarters
came anywhere near being built on
similar lines. Fate seems to have c get
OF -four molds which she uses regularly
In forming warblers whom she intends
for quartets-bassos have a certain set
Of specifications, barytones another,
and so on. Nearly every quartet when
1t Frances out in range of the foot
lights and forms for action presents
an Irregular pyramid TO Its audience.
You can't escape quartets. No matter
II you go to an amateur minstrel or
an everyday theater, be-
fore the program Is over the master OF
ceremonies announces:
1.-THE next number will be the In
tercity quartet"
The big one looks as II he received
his musical training from pulling OAK
stumps or ripping large openings IN
| football line-ups. His chest has the
capacity Of a molasses hogshead anC
his shoulder muscles look as hard as
iron. The other end is occupied by q
small young man whose exercise evil
IDENTIFY was gained by wrestling will
acute dyspepsia.
| Looks as If he'd strained himself
lifting forty-grain quinine capsules,
observes a young man while they're
singing the college ditty where thu
young man inquiries, ''Who-o-o-'s catch
ing any fish o-o-o-n Sun-dayT
At first they sing In concert and yol
naturally connect the heavy voices will
the heavyweight singers. If they'd onl.
stick to that formation all would b.
well, but they all run off into tn
wings, as though they really were re
luctant to sing and that 1t made then
mad TO hear the applause and send tn
trillers out one at a time. First come
the Hercules-hls heavy tread shake
the building-he is a crowd by himself
He draws in about 80 per cent of tn
oxygen in the hall to I'LL his lung
with. The audience waits for the thur
der of the heavy's voice and
Then those present look at each ott
err with an m-I-asleep-pinch-me el
preston, for the giant hands out
small voice and finally gets lost up
the scenery. A canary bird could han
die the same volume without oyerta,
ing his Adams apple. Then comes tn
little one; ne walks family to the Gel
ter of the stage and looks about Il
something to lean against
"An imitation of the worm in IL
clutches of the early bird" sneers Il
cynic.
The feeble one runs his prominel
larnyx up his throat and swallows
twice. Then he turns himself loos
Z And the voice that comes out is a roa
When he gets to playing with Il
r heavy notes the scale goes right dow
through his shoes, through the flo
and rumbles around In the basemen
When he lets loose some Of his be
the plaster falls from the ceiling ar
e the cobblestones out front jar loo
y and dance about in giddy circles. tt
effects are registered on the earthqual
Instruments In Washington.
Moral: It's the two-horse-power m
e tor that carries the sixty-horse-pow
s foghorn.