The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1909-06-04

stand from a man on the stage pro-
vided they like him off,"
"Sir!" The little man drew him.
self up to his full height and glared
daggers at the speaker. II have had
occasion before to complain of an i'll
timed flippancy on your part, that has
no SAVIOUR of wit and is merely vul-
gar, SIR he said, with crushing dig
nifty. "You will take fortnight's no.
tice, Mr.. Grisson.'
Easy, guv'nor; thought you want
ed my sympathy said Joe, unabashed,
who received notice" on an average
twice week. "My mistake But
when it cones to throwing bouquets
to oneself-well, fancy deserve
sore of the credit for the terrific
business this week. Wasn't all the
town talking about me on Tuesday
morning?-howI nearly frightened the
life out of professional boxing man,
simply cowed him!" with a rising
self-importance il his voice. ''Take
it from me, that's what's drawn the
business, guy'ror. They wanted to
see mel"
There was ripple of laughter from
behind, and Joe turned sharply round,
to see Peggy Chatterton at the wings.
They were on the stage; the morning
rehearsal was just over. Peggy
laughed all the more to see the come
dams frown.
1--WE are only thankful" she cried.
mischievously, that there was any
Joe left to tell the tale-it seemed so
doubtful at one time"
Certainly the tale. as Joe now told
it. was very much idealized version
of an incident that had marked the
opening night in Lendal.
There had been rather a rowdy Gle
ment in the theater; asrarty of noisy
sporting men drawn to the town by
neighboring race meeting were among
the audience, who from the rising OF
the curtain had disturbed the per-
Torrance, ''guying' the actors, inter-
rupting the scenes with facetious COM
ments-such an audience as theat-
rical company most of all breads.
Then finally some one threw an
orange. 1t was when Joe was on the
stage; and it whiZzd past his head,
missing it by an inch.
Joe's Irritation had been steadily
mounting; this was more than flesh
! and blood could stand In his indig.
nation he cast prudence to the Winds;
ice jumped over the footlights. his
blood boiling. and made straight for
the man responsible for this GROWING
outrage, pushing his way among the
audience. Before the man he had sim
gled out quite realized what was hap
pening, almost before Joe quite re-
allied it himself, the comedian had his
head in chancery, to the immense de-
light of the surprised audienc.
But Joe's fires of enthusiasm died
out with remarkable abruptness. For
even as he was administering a very
unscientific cuff to the head he had
"chanceried," he made the appalling
discovery that its owner was en-
dowed with the physique of a profess
sional man; and apparently his only
reason for not, making an effort to de-
fend himself was that he was con-
vulsed with laughter.
Joe had the sudden sensation as of
cold water trfckling down his spine.
His knees Shook beneath him as the
man quite easily jerked himself free
from the relaxing grip.
you've done it this time, Joe!" was
the unhappy comedians thought,
beads of perspiratfon breaking through
the grease paint.
No one could have been more sur
prised than Joe to hear the others
first words-articulated with diff.
Guilty, because he was laughing 50
consumedly.
'Well, I'm bowed if that doesn't
fair cop the biscuit! A chap like you
to come and fetch mea smack on the
ear-me, Tom Ebbut, the light
weight" And he roared again. "We.l
you're a real good plucked 'un
straight you are; and I'm sorry We
guyed you! Shake hands,"
d haven't time to stop and tall
just now" ice stammered, taking the
extended brawny hand nervously
I'm keeping the stage waiting
After that the play had gone splen
didly to the end. There could no
have been a more enthusiastic audi
ence; the pugilist and his friends
gave Joe great reception every tim.
he appeared; and the next day tn,
comedian had found himself unex
pectedly hero. BY the end Of tn,
week Joe was quite ready to accep
the popular verdict as correct, an,
gave himself airs on the strengtl
of 1t.
He treated Peggy Chatterton'
ironical remark now with dignifie
silence, possibly because no effectiv
retort occurred to him; and h
stalked out of the wooden theatel
with the faithful Monty, to their IL
vorite bar, where the landlord was
crony of theirs.
! Ralph strangways came in for
, good deal of discussion in that ba
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