davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
PERSONALS
One Cent a Word Each Insertion


PROF. CONDORY, NJ. D. BALTIMORE,
Md, COS n. Calvert st.-Specialist for
Skin, Stomach. Heart. and Nervous Dis
eases: all contracted ailments cured by a
new method: all traces eradicated; 80
years successful practice; guaranteed
Hours. 9-12. p. and 81 .. m. Call or
write 24St
MISS S-AIANICUR1NG. SHAM
pooling, facial and scalp treatment. lZ19
Eye st NV. Phone Main 6229. 110tf
HIGHEST CASH PRICES PAID FOR
worn garments; either ladies' or gents !;
send postal; will call. i. TARSHES, 1908
7th st. NV Phone North 499. l9Ott'
MISS GOODWIN.
Manicuripg, shampoOing, and scalp
treatment. Second floor front 500 ST.
NV. Walk IN, Phone NJ. GS65 zsl'
WORKINGMEN, DOES YOUR PAY EN-
velope run 10 stocks. bonds, or real
estate? II not, see US for a tailor-made,
slightly used suit at Sc 70 So We save
you clear S. note for tho comfort OF the
wife and baby. One price only. JUSTH )
OLD STAND, 90 ID nw-
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
FURNISHED.

225 BID UNCOMFORTABLE ROOMS;
s. and s. per week. pa
COZ PA AVE. NW.-KID SULLIVAN
and Casey's. furnished front rooms. Sc
and . per month; gentlemen only. 203-tf'
2O02 G ST. NW.-ROOAIS FOR RENT,
furnishes or unfurnished: transients ac-
commodated. Telephone West l5OS.
myi9-tf
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
RAILROADS.
BALTIMORE & OEI0 RAILRnAI

BALTIMORE & OHIO RAILROAD.
LEAVE NEW UNION STATION.
ROYAL BLUE LINE
Ef Eh1 OTHER HOUR or TIE ODD HOUR"
TO PHILADELPHIA AND NEW YORK.
NV TERMINAL. I'D STREET. NEW YORK.
Z 20 O. 10. Diner Pullman paflo-
- a. NJ Observation Parlo-. fIve-horr train
81 ~ a. NJ Diner and Pullman Parl0r Car
II % a. N. Diner and Pullman Parior Car
- - = ~ hlntr ana friiHlau Far.Or Car
80 p m Itoyal Limited" an Pullman. Shour.
~ 3. M Coaches 10 Philadelphia.
~ ?. m Diner and Pullman Parlor
- p; ~. 1oachcs 20 New York.
l5;l5 IigDt Sleerers 10 New YORK.
~ S ~ s5ls7slers g PhladeT9ia and New York.
500 p. n.
EVERY HOUR OK THE HOUR"
-2E t51O. $50. 20 ~. 500 = ~ vi .qoo
go 1850 ~ 20 ~. -lz1O noon. rIZl5. -IN.
ID l-N0 $50 80. So % 100, AS 800, SOS.
81 80, 40, 99o 100. $50. 800 1850 'i0a5.
CHICAGO. ~ Hs ~ " AZ
.,ClNClNNATI. ST louis. AND LOUISVILLE
's:l9 =. a., -i-5 p. ~. $3.50 night.
- lA4SHJk1 'slO g. No.. IN. '9.lo ?. n 'l2.5
CLEVELAND. 900 r n.
MI,4sl,l,l ~, '3;ie =. d.. 81 r. N.
MiN1hESI TER. i9l9 O. m. f855. 800 %. n
- t'i - ANIcA' 50 's:le S9j a. ~ $780, tiao
HAGERSTowN '9IO o. NJ $50 p. m
S5sD and 800 D. M 49, 49,
DAILY iEXccut sunday. gsuuday onIy.
lELEEHONES a. al the frllsrlrv TYTke. Orioas-
van -. rev Union Station: Ticket Onlce Main
''eos liioinlauon Bureau. Main ESQ.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
WANT AID BRANCHES
--UF----
THE WASHINGTON HERALD

may be left at the main office, 81 Fit
tecnth street northwest. or at any OF the
following branches, or may be telephoned
direct 10 the main Office, and bill Will DO
sent for the amount due
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
LEGAL NOTICES.
-OLF q ROsENBERG. -

IN TIE SUPREME COURT or TIE DISTRICT
q Columbia. John NJ Riord1n end Rose Rior-
oon Comp. ailaDts. IS. Marx St0ckWell e al. De-
Pendants Eauity No. 26'L-The object Of this
suit is % establish the title q ;he courlsinants -
lots thirty 3D. a-d thirtv-cne lsil iu Robinson
White and Arthur G.. Bishop trustees Subdivision
q lots 10 square cgi- hundred and f0rty-hre lsss
in the ciiy % Wsshinrton District % Columbia as
said subdivision Is recorded IN Book g. rage g. %
The records q the Ofioe Of tho Surveyor Of said
District. good Of record II fec simple by adverse
possession On motion Of the comnlainants by their
solicitors. Nol & Rosenberg 1t Is this 8FB DAY
OF JULY. A. D. 1902 ordered: That ths defend
arts. Mark St0ckwell John Siocfwell Jane Stock
vel Johnston. Elizabeth Stoczwel Hanc0ck. Sarah
etockvel O'Donrell Jcha Stcckwen. r.. Mary
Buns. Geo-go Wattcrson. Il they or either be liY-
Ing. OF they either be dead her. his. OF their
unEroEn heirs cCTisees ard ahenees. ard also the
unknown heirs. deTisees. and aliences Of Eliza d.
Nat-crsou. cause their Gpparancs 70 be entered
herein on Of before the frst rule day occurring three
mouths altCr tho first pubiicstion q his oTCsr
otherwise the case VIII be PROCEEDED With a. -
case o. default; Provided a coy q this order %
published N the Washington Law Reporter and
The Washington Herald Cnce 81 each Of three sue
cczsivo wees during tie first month next after ths
first Ulbi-ation and twice a month during each
o. The next succeeding Two months JOB BAR
NAID Justice. A true c0TT-Tcs-; Seal J. r.
YOUNG. Cerk- by T. J. MCKEE, ASSISTANT CLERK
syl017 . 81 au7 q solls
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
REAL ESTATE FOR RENT.
One Cent q Word Each Insertion

HOUSES
FOR RENT
1850 Willard st. NV: rooms and /. So. 81
RiggS ST. NV; 70 rooms and bath So 90
1740 Kalorarna road: 6 rooms and b. 82.5l
= n St NV; s rooms and bath. 27.00
lSZ1 w ST. NV: groom brick 1880
bOl 1lth st. sw.; rooms and bath. 1850
CHAS. s. MUIR & CO..
1903 n. Y. ave. Zl3
1851 MARION ST. NW.-SIX ROOMS
and bath; In frst-class condition: $3.50.
Apply 1852 9Th st. NV. PIP
FOR RENT-COLORED L ST: s
ROOMS AND BATH; PERFECT RE
PAIR THIS IS 4 VERY DESIRABLE
HOUSE-S3050. KEY NEXT DOOR.
CHAS. Z. BANES, 1921 F ST.
"a
FOR OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES.
PA n ST. NV
9 rooms. bath. furnace heat
Rent, $35 per month.
12zS 18TH ST. NV
10 rooms. bath. latrobe heat
Rent, $40 per month.
PARTIALLY FURNISHED.
2Q2l Q ST. NV
10 rooms, bath. furnace heat.
BY the year, SO per month.
FURNISHED.
Columbia ROAD, near Greater 18th st.
II rooms. baths, furnace heat.
Handsomely furnished SII5 per month.
1913 H St. NV. Phone Main 1872,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31

There is not person who reads The Washington Herald but
who will find ads Of personal importance this Every day the
contains interesting of what people and need Thou
sands of readers find this page interest tevearn money
pleasure just by reading and answering the ads here II
one Of them, get in the game" and also
ADVERTISE IN THE HERALD
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
MANICURIEG.
PAWNBROKERS.

READY MONEY AT PER CENT.
On watches. diamonds. and jeWeiry.
LOUIS ABRAHAMS
Bonded broker. l33 Ninth st. NV.
Old gold. silver. end pawn ticket
bought for cash. S3-tf
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
TYPEwRITTEN LETTERS.
DO YOU CIRcrn.Ap1zra

And are your letters read9 Or
are they thrown in the waste bas-
kelE our letters are read with the
same interest given personal let
ters. Names and addresses filed in
20 match exactly the body of the
les1eT. COPY writing. printing.
sealing, and mailing. Prompt serI,
Ice reasonable charges.
FRANCIS NJ. AFFORD & Co
Direct Advertiskg,
<iS-l1 MUNSEY BUILDING
Phone Main 5S57.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31

Eat, drink, and he merry" and ad-
vertise your wants in The Washington
Herald. Rate, / cent = word.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
NONMEDICAL HEALING.

.NONMEDICAL HEALING BY ENFORC-
ed circulation OF the blood without
drugs, surgical procedure. OF detention
from business. Circulars, information
and consultation free. PROF. II. n. d.
PARKER, 1922 Ninth st. NV, Washington
D. c Hours 10 to c. Phone NJ. S112
my26-tf
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
WANTED ROOMS.

One Cent q Word Each Insertion.
YOUNG MAN, GOVERNMENT EN-
ploye. desires room and board IN small.
refined. private family give price and
full particulars. BOX "a, Herald Office.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
MASSAGE.

MRS. KEIGHTLEY, THE SCIENTIFIC
Masseuse, gives eucalyptus vapor cabi-
ret baths general massage and cool aIro-
hol friction for rheumatism, nervousness.
and obesity; magnetic and eicctrlcitv'
Hours, 10 70 ; and By appointment. 1895
\. Y. ave. Phone NJ. 1897 Open Sundays
from 10 2 1921
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
WITH hoard.

OAKMONT. $500 14TH ST.-EXTRA
large, airy room and one smaller room:
pOrchcs, extensive grounds trees, tennis.
and stable. Phone Col. 2SZ7. Zl3
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
UNFURNIsIIED.

FOR RENT-TWO OR THREE UNFUR.
nished rooms in corner dwelling, neal
LIST and w SITS. Address f. +. NJ, 26 q
81. ne. 213
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
READ AND ANSWER
TO-DAY'S WANT ADS
REAL ESTATE FOR SALE.
ne Cent a Word Each Insertion.

One Cent Word Each Insertion.
HOUSES
FOR sALE-ON PA. AVE. Sc. THREE
extra fine new houses for. $500 cash and
$50 monthly; whole cost only $3.50; fine
rooms; tiled bath, furnace heat; every
comfort your heart could desire. Remem-
ber the numbers-l503. 1905. and 1897. next
to drug store and right on Capital Trae-
ton car line.
WILLIGE. GIBBS & DANIEL.
6O5-6O5 18th. 217
FOR SALES, eco: IN BLOOMINGDALE;
rooms and BATH heated by furnace.
auto shed in rear; possession In one
THOs. J. FISHER & co. Qnc.).
7SS 18th ST. NV.
Phone NJ. $3.50. After ?. N. phone
NJ Sissy. z4
FOR sALE-s6,O 600; DOWTOWN INVEST
ment; rent. SOL per month: two dwell
ings, near TN and N Y. ave. NV. IN
THos. ]. FISHER & co. Qnc).
73S 18th ST NV.
Phone III. $780, After p. IN phone
n. Stacy. pa
FOR SALE-3,T50: NEW HOUSE IN
Bloomingdale; lot 20X@ 10 paved alley;
bright rooms and bath; open plumbing;
Al furnace; gas heater attached 10 boiler;
concrete cellar under entire house; imme-
diate possession. For inspection and
terms consult Sales Department
THOS. J. FISHER & co. Qnc),
73s 18th st. NV.
Phone NJ. $780, After p. m. phone
NJ. 5i45y. IA
FOR ? ALE-S5. 800; GOOD SECTION NV,
near n. II. ave. and T ST.; rooms and
tiled bath; hot-water heat; colonial front.
Terms 10 suit.
THOs. J. FISHER & co. dno.).
81
Phone NJ. $50. After 5 p. m. phone
N. 6746y. "a
FOR SALE-Sl3 U0 VERY ATTRACTIVE
home on Columbia road. near the High
lands, containing y rooms, 2 Tiled bath
rooms, hot-Tater heat. rear stairway.
This house must be seen TO be appre-
THOs. J. FISHER & CO. Qne).
73S 18th ST NV
Phone NJ. 6Soo. After p. m. phone
NJ. 6l46y. IA
FOR SALE - NEAR GOVERNMENT
Printing ONCE; only $500; Nos. SO and
I'D y 81 ne; new brick houses, rooms
reception hall: modern plumbing: cellar;
furnace; lots 2iXlG0 20 alley. JOHN
SCRIVENER. 907 G NV. 2l7
FOR SALE-H, NEAR 18TH ST Ne: G.
room brick dwe4iing: modern plum bing;
IN hne condition all through price. $3.50.
JOHN SCRIVENER. sG G nv. IL
FOR SALE-REDUCED TO S2s,00o; FINE
corner. overlooking Iowa Circle: y large
rooms. all fronting on a street: built by
present owner for n home: substantially
constructed and beautifully finished: own
er leaving town; Will consider less offer
than above
II. L. RUST. COS 18th st. 201-tfs
HeR SALE-HOME OR INVEST
MENT, SIXTH ST, NEAR ~ ST.
NV; 10 ROOMS AND BATH
CBRICK); ONLY $500
c. a. RHODES.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
F0R RENT-RonMS.
One CenI a W0rd Each InsertiOn.

a PHYSICIAN WILL RENT THE Up
per part OF his house OF four rooms to
a good couple for S25 per month. For
further particulars apply TO BOX ~
Herald Ollicc. 2l3
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
DOGS. CATS. MANS Kr

SINGING CANABIES. PARROTS. DOGS.
rabbits. guinea pigs. and Flce-Flea Dog
Soap; kills fcas; keeps skin healthy:
makes coat glossy. SCHMID'S BIRD
STORE, az l2tn ST. INV. mye5-tf
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
sTEA0I CARPET CLEANING.

T. II. YOUNGS. 81 I ST. N. W.
Carpets carefully cleaned and properly
stored: also mattresses and feathers rem
ovatcd at reasonable rates: drop postal
on phone Main 1913. 224
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31

Out in the country under a tree.
A book in my hand, IS the place FOR me.
Close to old nature-thats where I'd be.
Away fpm the crowd, all alone and free.
Find the bull
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31

WANTED-A HOME IN WASHINGTON:
experienced In cooking; no washing A
!. WILSON, Sl4 9Th St, Lynchburg, Va.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
REFRIeERAToPs { IcEBnEEs.

DRS. o. W. AND w. J. ELZEY, DEN
lists. sw. corner 10th and T SITS. NV
Reasonable prices Work guaranteed
Phone Main 4252 lg7tf'
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
AGENTS WANTED.

One Cent a Word Each Inserti0n.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
HELP WANTED-MALE.

one Cent a Word Each Insertion.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31

ANSWER TO YESTERDAYS PUZZLE.
l. Rake. p Corn Cutter Scare crow. l. Barn
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
OFFICES.

FOR RENT-THE MARYLAND BLDG,
100 II st. NV; desirable Office rooms
including heat, light, elevator. and janitor
service; prices. SIP TO SIS per room.
WEAVER BROS. 1416 F 81. NV 157-tf'
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1909-07-31
MOVING, PACKING & STORING.

STORE YOUR FURNITURE. PIANOS.
&C, at WESCHLER'S, $50 PA. AVE.
NV. Rates reasonable. Centrally locat-
ed Telephone NJ. l2S2. 29gs
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21
HEADQUARTERS OF
WIRELESS HERE

SEATTLE, Aug. 21.-At a meet
ing of the managers of the Pacific
Radio Co., held at the company's
offices I'm this city yesterday after
noon, 1t was decided to make Spo-
kane headquarters for the corpor-
alton in eastern Washington, Ore
gon and northern Idaho. G. F.
Hickok, vice president OF the cor
poration, will leave Seattle on Mon
day for Spokane. and will make ar
rangements at once for the erection
of large steel tower. Every effort
viii be made to open up wireless
telephone communication between
Spokane and the exposition grounds
ut Seattle prior to the closing of
the exposition. Instruments and
complete outfit was ordered by
telegraph yesterday afternoon. The
entire circuit of wireless telephone
long distance stations will include
Spokane, Walla Waila, North Yak
lima. Wenatchee, Everett. BeIling-
HAM. Seattle. Tacoma, Portland and
Vancouver. 1t was announced from
the company's offices yesterday af-
tern00n that ut least four OF these
stations would be in working oper-
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21
MAJOR BYERS
MTENDER
BY FRED SCHAEFER.

"Howdy, Maze" chirped Jim, as
Major Byers doomed up in the lunch
wagon for. his coffee and rolls.
FLOWS your scheme for utilizing
the holes in macaroni getting
along?"
81 have had to drop that, James, y
said the major, ito take up prof.
ect for feeding hens cue chalk SO
they will lay billiard balls"
Doing much with it," asked Jim.
mot a great deal yet" replied
the major, dropping three Jumps of
sugar into his coffee. II was side
tracked trying to graft huckleber-
ries on grape vines to make them
grow in clusters"
rs it a SUGGEST" asked the ca
bOose caterer.
ut had every prospect of becom-
ing one" replied the distinguished
intender, "but l took up something
more important-namely, training
warrior ants to set type ON the War
Cry"
Il suppose that was easy?" snick.
cred
Easy enough. but tedious" an
swered the major. $50, before !
could complete it. had an inspira.
ton to devise an international fried
potato intended to supplant the
German fried and French fried and
other kinds with one really cosmo.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21

pose and within easy reach of all?
Truly, religion nowadays makes
anything but q successful appeal to
the mass Of the people, and de-
cisions like this of Mayor Pratt's
do but tend to lessen the force of
that appeal. Movements Of social
reform, on the other hand, exercise
an ever-increasing hold upon peo-
pies attention. This being the
case, 1t is surely the more impera.
tive that Mayor fratt should alter
his decision and allow freedom of
speech to all, for he may be sure
that whatever truth exists in either
religious or secular organizations
will, by such method of tolerant
unbiased procedure, win out in the
end.
Failing this, he should in fair
ness continue the ban previously
placed upon all street meetings
religious or secular; although II
may be granted that both this lat
ter method and the one now In
force fail to meet either the de
mands of reason or of the consti
tuition. F. L. Wood.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21
John D. Rockefeller's Best
Friend on Earth.
much to tell.

much to tell
OF course we know of John D. Archbold, and Senator
Aldrich and Dr. Biggar and Pat Lynch who tends the
gate at his secluded Forest Hill retreat and the various
ministers who fill his pulpts and certain Of exalted
Standard Oil Co. and in Wall street-all of whom may be
regarded his fast friends in another. We
do not mean them. And there the late III. H. Rogers
and the late President Harper of the University of Chi
cago We do not them. His best friend is still very
much alive.
John D. Rockefellers best friend is humble than
altogether anonymous. Now this is not playful way of
referring to Mr.. Common People We do not mean Mr.
Mr. Rockefelers best friend is who voluntarily
put John D. where he u.s. and is voluntarily tong right
now, unsung and unheraded, to make him thousand
times the richest man in the world
After that it is high time to spring that friends name
But to do this is rather difficult This great friend
retiring and modest and obscure 1t would be hard for
you to recognize him by any of his names.
Indulge us bit more. Ever hear of organic chemistry?
Ever hear the end OF the products of petroleum.
you never heard the end Of the many products of pero
leum. And John D. Rockefeller with instinct so prophetic
as to be almost uncanny, cornered petroleum long ago.
Already bionaire he is only beginning to make his
fortune
Because the chemist John D. Rockefeer best friend!
Know this Just about everything that is necessary to
life contains hydrocarbons The most available natural
product rich in hydrocarbons is petroleum And it would
take OF this newspaper to merely list the hydro
carbon byproduct of petroleum Some of the latest are
quinne and perfumes and fruit favors Yes company
is said to be marketing altar of roses from coal
tar claiming subtle fragrance every whit fragrant and
more lasting than the real thing On top of all this dis
coveries are being made daily.
The chemist potterng at his stills and retorts and
test tubes does Aladdin magic with pint of petroleum
Why, it has already been years since the majority
OF the natural animal and vegetable substances have been
reproduced artficiay. Also, thousands of compounds
have been found that not known exist ready
anywhere in nature And all this from the very simplest
known compound of carbon. The chemist says that given
the formula of substance, it is within the range of
science to duplicate it from another source.
We have had quite laugh about Mr.. Rockefeer's
petrol butter reported to be practical substitute o1
the butter produced by the patient Better laugh
too Before he dies, this nation may be LITERALLY
eating out of John D. Rockefeller's hand
Thanks to the chemist.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21

Tvust-A body Of water sur
rounded by senators.
TaiIor-0ne Of nine persons Il re-
quires to make q man-pay for q
suit Of clothes.
orphan-child sheived In an in
stitution.
Chicken Thief-One who lays for
cow-Animai that 10 compelled
to feed the human race and then 10
criticized for being tubercular.
Dairy-An aquatic plant.
Rhode isiand-Name Of a watch
charm worn by Senator AIdrich.
Mint JuIep-shrubbery for inter-
Tor decoration. :.
Smoke - Manufactured article
Into which our timber supply has
been converted.
ENTHUSIASTICALLY rival of the
furnace for the hand Of the bank
roll.
Fireman-Person who 10 q hero
so long as he 10 In the department.
CelIaret-Piece of furniture that
costs itself over and over to keep
stocked.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21
DO YOUEVER SCOLD YOLRsssF1ELLO o" GIRL?
7 SEE HOW SHE HAS IT ON YOU SOME7 TIMES

do we have our troubles?" The
pretty chief operator at the Spo-
kane Exchange building on Wall
street, drew long breath, tried
to speak, shut her eyes, then said:
See here, Mister Man, sit in at
this switch board for a while and
hear what you hear. You move that
plug around anywhere you want to.
1t plugs in on any line. You can
tell there what the operators are
saying to the subscribers, and what
they're saying back"
1t was an interesting and con-
vincing demonstration.
Number
"Nn-ore-grr-ty-o one"
What was that, again."
Good heavens, why don't you
listen? / said Main 4-9-THIRTY-
ONE. DID YOU HEAR THAT?"
Click-click.
Number"
Say, what do you think you're
paid for? l been a-waitin' here five
minutes, jangling the bell. What've
you been doing? Sleeping?"
Number, please?"
Here I'm in a big hurry, and
have to be tied up on a phone for
five or ten minutes because you
girls don't tend to your business.
Lemme talk to the chief operator.
I'll find out why / can't get any
service on this line"
Click-click.
This is the chief operator" came
the voice beside me.
Say, what's the matter with my
phone? I been waiting 10 minutes,
right in the middle of a lot of bust
ness, because l can't get any serv-
ice"
do you have an extension
phone"
"Yes."
well, see If someone wasn't u.s.
ing the extension just before you
took down your receiver.
Well, was there?"
Click-click-click.
"The old crab rang off," said the
chief operator to me; ''he could
have saved lot of time while he
was calling down the operator.
Another thing that most people
don't know is about juggling the
receiver hook up and down when
they're trying to get central-that
they have to do it slowly. If they
shake it fast, there isn't time
enough for the flash to ever reach
the board. We print that in the
telephone books, but no one ever
reads it, I'm afraid"
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21

politan and acceptable to all"
Gimme the recipe cried Jim,
eagerly.
You shall have It," said the
major, biting roll in half, after !
perfect my burglar pacifier, a sub
stitute for the inhuman and alto
gether unreasonable burglar alarm. y
so you are on that lay now?''
asked the chariot chef.
mot at this moment" corrected
Major Byers. 1T interfered with
my labors on a soldering machine
for canned music"
when will you finish that?" muir.
INJURED Jim, weakly.
After complete my plans for
reaching Mars with dirigible
canal boat" cooed Major Byers,
wiping his chin with a newspaper
in lieu of a napkin. of which same
there are none afforded in Jim's
lunch wagon.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1909-08-21

across the floor and swung his part
ner he was an epic poem. When he
stamped his foot there was a dent
left in the floor to show for it.
This was well. No gent can win
laurels at picnic dance, the third
annual hop of the Cornucopia So;
cialo, without coming down real
hard at a certain point while trip
ping to a measure. He may wear
his derby on the back of his head
handkerchief stuffed under his
collar, and be In shirt sleeves, but
this is overlooked IL he stamps like
a dray horse.
Liberto was making good at a re
cent picnic when all at once he
crumpled up like shred of vermi
celli. Also, he remarked "ouch!'
Tarcone had broken his leg.
Since then there has been 10
of nerve and vim absent from thu
local dances.