davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
A Thrifty Wife.

A Canadian minister had just mar ried n couple The registers were signed. and nothing remained but the giving and taking of the fee. The bridegroom. strapping young fellow. asked, How much is it?'
 The parson glanced at the smiling bride and slyly answered. Whatever you think it's worth.
 Now. 1t should have been worth a good deal, for the girl was young and pretty "I reckon it's worth about 30 cents." said the swain. holding out two quarters.
 The clergyman looked blankly at the coins. then turned to the fair one. "lll leave 1t to you. madam" he said. What do you think it's worthy"
 What did this young and blushins bride do: She reached out. took the coins. handed one quarter to the min ister and put the other into her pocket.
 "A thrifty wife" said the Canadian. with sigh. .'is her husbands crown -
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
A Characteristic Whistler Reply

Whistler's mother cherished a wish that he should become a soldier, as so many MacNeills and Ministers had been before him. Consequently Whistler entered the Military academy at West Point as a cadet. But he showed little aptitude for studies beyond drawing A good story is told in the Pennells' life of the eccentric artist of an exami- nation in history:
 "Whatw said his examiner You do net know the date of the battle of Buena Vista? Suppose you were to ge out to dinner and the company be- gan to talk of the Mexican war and you. West Point man. were asked the date of the battle. What would you dor "Dos. said Whistler. Why. l should refuse to associate with peo- pie who could talk of such things at dinner"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Didn't Like it Diluted.

An old Mississippi pilot, speaking of intemperanee. said.
 sOnce 1 remember a passenger of ours fell overheard We tished him elt with boat hook after he had been soaking on the bottom half an hour or so Ne laid him limp and sopping on the deck. and steward ran for the whisky bottle. As l pried the mans mouth open to pour soIne whisky down his throat his lips moved. A kind of murmur came from them. l put my ear down close to listen. and l heard the half drowned wretch say:
 Roll me on d bari fust to git some o, this water out It'll weaken the Iitker'"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
A Warm Reception.

A member of congress was going home late one night when he met a young uian who was satisfactorily .'loaded.' The congressman happened to know where the young man lived and kindly guided him home The con- gressman had no sooner pulled the bell than the door was thrown wide open and tall, husky woman appeared. She never said word. but grabbed the young man by the collar and shook him till she fairly loosened his teeth. then into the hall she took him and slammed the door.
 The congressman was descending the steps when the door was thrown open second time. and his friend flew out of it as if thrown by a catapult. At the foot of the stairs he landed. and the congressman picked him up. Very much frightened and considera- bly, sobered. the young man gasped: We don't live here! We moved last week"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
A Datifui Husband.

man who had overestimated his capacity for the amber fluid was ar rested on the street for improper con duct. In the police court the next morning the usual charge of intoxica- tion was filed against him. and he was fined S. which he promptly paid. This done. he went out with very worried expression on his eountenance. only to return few minutes later and eau tiolsly approach the clerk
 ''Pieasa sir he said, would you just give me a receipt for that 8 paid you? l want to show my wife that didn't spend all my money for drink. Success Magazine.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
 No Peace There.

To have to eat Christmas dinner at a hotel is bad enough. no matter how numerous the courses and how choice the yiands. To have to eat it alone is worse. One man who sat at table solitary glanced over the menu with littie interest. It was big card. re- srlendent with pictures of peinsettias. and Tt the top was the motto:
 Peace on earth, good will to men
 lh an effort to forget his depression he said 10 the waiter. pointing at the Biblical quotations:
 Please bring me some of that first. fFs never eaten peas that way. May te l won't like them"
 The waiter was an Irish American With smile that began and ended in his eyes he said soberiy:
 I'm sorry, sir, but that's mistake. There isn't any peace in the kitchen We've got an Irish and Dutch cock Gown there"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
The - Scrap Book
casey's Brilliant Idea.

The women of the church in a sub srh of Chicago were soliciting money ,a pay for decorating their house of uurship. They decided to call on Ca ey. who kept the leading saloon in the sjlIage. and ask for donation. They .alled. Casey met them genially. lis- tened to what they had to say and orompfly subscribed $500
 This was so much more than the so- iiriturs had hoped for that they were much fustered and could do nothing ,at stammer their thanks. Finally ene of them rounded 10 and said: Why, Mir. Casey. this Is most gener- ,gs of you. It will allow us to get what we want very much. fine stain- sd glass window
 And. Mr. Casey said the spokeswo- man. s-in view of this magnificent do- nation. isa't there some sentiment you would He to put on the windewT'
 Well. said Casey. Il think it would Ink foine 10 have on tn glass. bechune tn two parts av 1t. in nate letthers. sonethin' loike this: 'Afther Mass Wis II Casey's''
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
 A Matter of Irainina.

she was taken for the first time to see a trained animal show and came home much pleased with the performance. As she was at times slow to obey. mamma thought this good time to teach lesson. so she said. Don't you think. Josephine, if dogs and ponies md monkeys can learn to obey so well, that little girl like you. who knows much more than the animals, should obey even more quieklyz'
 Of course l would, mamma" came the instant reply. If l had only been IS wei trained as they have"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
A New Brand.

A nervous. worried looking man en- tered a large sporting goods establish, ment in the lower part of New York city and said in an anxious voice to the salesman. My wife telephened me awhile ago that she wanted me to be sure to bring home a Lorna poeHe. I've Inquired at half dozen places and can't find il. What sort of a game Is it?"
 The salesman. who knew sports from the ground up, if not much else. pondered only a moment before he said cheerfully; T don't think it's a game. It sounds to me like the name of new Scotch drink Try that place across the way with the screen doors"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Had his Revenge.

Pat had had trouble with his eyes and went to see . distinguished spe- eiaiist for relief On his arrival at The doctors office he found the usual large number of patients in tIe ante neon awaiting attention. and. though ae was in great hurry. he was forced 10 wait several dreary hours before his turn came He lost and regained eis .emper several times In the inte- tim. but when ali was over and ne igaaa himself oHi upon the stree; with tse day half spent Indignation over the igSs If valuable ili1e was the pFedoaa- iA@ai ngle in his feelings
 iiat 0i had me reyinge.- he e5aea- 'ase7i, with a bread smile. .as he told lls friend Mike about il afEerward- sH aon'f s'lsk he'Ii keep me waitin' sssia lai&e ulot.~
 hat lsd ye do fe ums~ asked Nike Sure an ol wins back tn next eay.
 szai fat '-oi got there a. ts-ine 5y
 tae eis'ek. an iyery toiIAe they said
 lMSs me turn to go in oi said Usd
 Val an let some other feliy have nss e-ace ontil the clock sfhruck twflve. an
 .eia oi slnf in Well says he. 'phwa'
 cz-a 0i do for yeS this MIornin'. Pafs
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Two nf Kind.

A distinguished specialist in Wash ington was called upon week or two ago by an eminent government offi- cial for treatment for nervous all meHt.
 The first thing you must do.' said the physician after an examination. ifs to give up both smoking and drinking"
 Whercupon the eminent official be- came real peevish- Look here. doc tor" he bnrst out now you're talk ing just like my wife,
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
He Aecepted the Qonkex-

When Barry Sullivan. the Irish tra. gedian, was playing Richard H. one night and the actor came to the lines horse. horse. My kingdom for a horse. some merry wag In the pit called out:
 And wouldn't fackass do as well for youf'
 sure, answered Sullivan. turning like flash al the sound of the voice. Come around to the stage doer at onee!'
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Today.

We shall do so much tn the years to
 cone.
 gut what have we done today? We shall give out gold in a princely sum. tut what did We give today? We shall lift the heart and dry the tear. We shall plant a hope in the place of
 fear. We shall speak with words of love and
 tAeef.
 Rnt what have we done today? V e shall be so kind in the after while. Bnt what have We been today2 Nc shall bring each lonely life a smile. But what have we brought today2 We snail give 10 truth q grander birth And to steadfast faith deeper worth, We shsa feed the hansering souls of
 earth.
 But whon have we fed today7
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Beecher and Barnum.

Henry Ward Beeeher was a great admirer of P. T Barnum and always took front seat when he attended Barnum's circus. Then it happened one day that Mr Beecher saw Mir. Rarnum enter his church and take a back seat Immediately MT. Beecher sought him out You must come right up here in front. Mir. Barnum. l always take a front seat when l come to your circus. and l want you to do the same when you come to mine"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
where Is God7

.oh. where is the sea- the fishes cried As they swam the crystal clearness
 through. .swe.ve heard from of old of the ocean s
 tide.
 And we long to look on the waters s
 blue.
 The wise ones speak of the infinite sea. Oh who can tell us if such there be The lark flew up in the morning bright And sang and balanced on sunny wings. And this was its song: 'I see the light. look OCT a world of beautiful things: But, flying and singing everywhere. In vain l have searched to find the air. -
 Rev. Minot Judson Savage.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
What Did Mother Mean7

boy asked one of his fathers din- ner guests who his next door neighbor asked if the gentleman was not fool.
 "No, my little friend' said the guest. .'he Is not fool. but a very sensible man. But why did you ask the question:"
 Why" said the little boy. my mother said the other day that you were next door to fool. and l wanted to know who lived next door to you"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
The Value of Books.

A young girl once asked Mark Twain if he liked books for Christmas gifts.
 Well. that depends" drawled the great humorist If book has a leather cover 1t is really valuable as a razor strop. If 1t Is brief, concise work. such as the French write, 1t is useful to put under the short leg of a wabbly table. An old fashioned book with clasp can't be beat as missile to hurl at dog, and a large book. like geography. is as good as a piece of tin to nail over a broken pane of glass"
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Union of Souls.

"What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life. to strengthen each oth- CT in all labor. to rest on each other in all sorrow. to minister to each other In all pain, to be with each other in si- lent. unspeakable memories at the mo. ment of the last partingf
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23

'Nawthin'.' says oL lookin' him shquare in the eye as oi turned on me heels and lift the room. Redad. oi don't believe he knows yit what sthruck 'umg-Harper's Weekly.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
lnspir.tion of Action.

l love the souls that rush along to their goal with a full stream of senti- ment that have too much of the posi- tive to be harassed by the perpetual uesatives, which. after all. are but the disease of the soul. 10 be expelled by terrifying the principle of vitality George Eliot.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23

"women must consider it a, dreadful fate to be an old maid" unused MT. Chugwater
 "They do. Josiah" said Mrs. Chug- water Look what terrible noodles they sometimes marry 10 escape 1t.
 And Josiah rubbed his chin, but said nor thing Exchange
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
Putnam Mail Service


 POST oFftCE OPEN
 frpm 6 ,S0 \. m. to s P. m. Sundays. from s.s0 te a.sa a. m. The lobby win remain open to Lock Box holders unti l2 n. Hohdsvs from 6.Sfss.m. sc l2 m..5.So to pm. Carriers window opea Sundays from $50 to s.S.
 MONEY ORDER DIVISION Open hem a. a. to . p. m., closed on Ssn- days and Legal Holidays. Registry Division open during office hoars
 pELrvEeIss Ky City Carriers Daily, Sundays asd Holidays esceptet) st s.90 a. m. and t.i0 ?. m. and II .eS \. m. in the Business Section. One delivery bv City Carriers on tlelidsvs.
 selections and ne.patehe. From ahe street Letter Boxes. tsandavs and Holidays esevpted.l
 Rss.pSNr,AL sxcrIos Collections. neSpatches SIS to 70 .. m-. mail despatched \, 10 .. nc S.So to e..S0 s. n.. i2.lb " s.So to 6sS0 P. m.. 4ap.m. fkoNr A>p EI~ STREET n0x- 10 o,eo eS sm m', "." 'ssP''s'e' NJ :. I'd. 10 lo liia 8, m.. islA S.So a. m.. !" d i" S.SS D. n. 300 ?. m., 's !. .' TtS
 RURAL rREs DELIVERY.
 Routes Ne. i,s, and | Rural Carriers lease daily. Sundays and Holi- days eSeerteH atS.iea. m return al S.i0 ?. n. Mailahle matter, weishing pounds or lcss sent hy Rural cssrlers must De prepaid hy stamps atsised.
 MAILS OPEN FROM Boston, New York. Hartford and all point . north, cast, south and yves. al s.i6 s. m. Boston. s1a, io.ta s. m, S.th, 6 oa ?. m. Danieisen, s.iA, Il s. m, s.ta ?. m. Norwich. S h. II a. m. a IA. H,N6 D. m. Hartford, sle, II a. m., A.le, GAS n. m. New York. SIS. Il s. m, s.io, 6.ta. ?. m, Worcester. s.tA s. n.. 6.oa ?. m. Webster, s.la \. n, 6.oa ?. m. Willimantie, S.ta. n a. m. 10 ?. m. Sundays tfom all points s.s0 s. m.
 MAILS oLosE FOR Bos,an.7 ,lo, io.io a. m, l2la,ssa, .ssp.n. panielson, T.#a, ia.io .. m, ! Sa, 7.4a p. n. Hartford. f.tn. lo.ie s. m., 5.s5 5.sa ?. m. New York, I.to, io.io a.m., s.ls.a S5.7 7.so ?. u. New iiayen, 40, lo.io A. ms s.aa. 7.ssp .. Norwich. s.tp, tO.laa. m, h.s6. G.4a n. m. willimaatie, s.io. 10 10 a. m. s.ss. ! ss D. n. Worcester, f.io. io.lo 4. m., a, t.ao. 7.S6 D. West and southern States. 5.lo 10. io.i0. .. it. a.iA. a.sA h.Sh. 7.A5 ?. m. Worcester aud Now London. North, Way Sts- lions. 1.ia a. m, S.Sa ?. n. Worcester and New London. South, Way Star tons. T.ia Il. ui., ASa m. Boston enl Hartford, East, Way stst,onA 7.lo !. m Boston and Hartford West. Way Stations. 6.ss ?. Ill. Boston and reegh.. East. Way Stations. s.1e D. Ill. Boston and reagh., West, Way Stations. lo.le A. m. Boston. Providence and New York. East, Way Stations. f0.1o a.m. woedstocks, Westiord and Eastford, hy stAgo. to.So Il. u, South, North. Easl. l0.S0 .. m., 5.3o p. m. Pomirct, 500 N. m, nsn ?. m. by stage. Nights for all points 5.4S ?. n. Sundays for all points. $40 P. m. ronfrct 7.sa |. m., a. South. Ea., and North 10 % .. n. b 35 D. m. West Woodstock, Woodstock Valley, Ws1oe ford and EAstfcrd i0.30 a. m. Yves, Themrson 7.t5 \. fn. Nights for sll noints 74sp m. Sundays Tor all points s.30 ?. m.
 ~u ssw 2. rwrH0e 0..A-.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
slW Reward, slee

The readers of this paper will be p,ea.ed to learn that there is at least one dreaded disease that sciebce has been able to cure in all its stages, and that 10 Catarrh. Halls Catarrh Cure is the only po.itiye cure now known to the medical fraternity. Catarrh being constitotion- al disease, requires . constitutionai trest- meut. HalI,s Catarrh Cure is taken in- ternsliy, acting directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. thereby destroying the foundation of the disease. aud giving the patient strength by building up the constitution and as- sisting nature in doing its work. The proprietors have so much faith in its curative powers that they ofier One Hun dred Dollars for any case that II fails to cure. Sepd for list of testimonials
 Address F. J. CHENEY & CO, Toie- do, O.
 Sold by all Druggists, 75e.
 Take Halls Family Pills for consiipa- tion.
 The smoothing spray oi Ely : I.squid Cream Balm, used III an aton,izer Is an unspeakable relief to s,.ffereres from cafarrh. Some ot them describe il as Godsend, and no wonder. The thick, foul discharge Is dislodged and the patient hreathes freely. .perhaps far the first lime Tn weeks Liquid Cream Balm contains al the healing, purifying elements oi inc solid form, and it never fails to satisfy. Sold by all druggists for soe., including spraying tube, or mailed Dy Ely Bros, 56 Warren Street, New York.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23

AHA COUNT OF PkOBATk HOLDEN AT A Pomffet within and for the DistFice e PomfTet on the ioth day Of April, A. D .ty1A
 Present. Charles Q Jhompsop. Esq. Jua9e. 0n motion Of John r. Grasvenor 1f P0Wetdts Exscufor oa tho tesfsts estate of Amnvysus Mathrwson late of pomfret. within said distsict, deesased.
 This Court doth decree that six months be AI- lowed and limited for the creditors of said estate fs exhibit their claims against the same t0 e0e Exeeutnr and directs that public nofiee ne ne wspapef having circulation fD said disfvtats and by posting copy thereof on the public stGn post In said town of PDmffet inesrest the pinee where tue deeeassd last dweif-
 Certiced from Record, iG-is Charles Q. Thompson Judge
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23

AT 4 COURT OF PROBATE HOLDEN AT "A Putnam within and for the dtssytet of Putnam on the 7fh day M April A. D. ieQos
 Present. EDWARD c. WRIGHT .Jadse. On motion Of Diana B Novron.Df PutnAm, Ce.s Executrix Bon the last wtll nni testament 04 0aspsrd Nerron. late of Putnam, within said This Court doth decree that six months be el- lowed limited for the creditors of ssid esisu v exhibit their elaine sgatnsf the sanne Q tee Execatrtx and direct thst psbItc noeics v uvoo of this order Dy sdvertislag 10 . neNepae9 pSs- lisbed in Putnam having ctrculatios in eale A!s- sict. asd by postfsg copy thereof on ths ynoss the place where the dsesased iAst auell
 Certified frOm Record,
 Is ts EDWARD q. WRIGHT ysa2e Ats10sif of fTo6sis held . Thonpson wilb- Ain snd f0s the diststct 0 Tnonpson e tne
 Presens. 0eosge .. Crcney ye1GD Oa motion ef Chasi<s Y. Iosrey q r9tn0a Coan.. Adminsstsafes sn ths tetsesats esea!s = Kstn !s s.s a...,s. A5s S late q 1As~''s se'n This uossi doek Gssrse that slx nensas ivsm 1ais h~reof be allowed aaA liatte1 SSe = aesfnst the sams t0 the said Ad1niniseraaes cd directs that psbiic nosies ' giysn q ssis oso.s by adyertisisE b sn<vspa9sF pse!esheA ia tee. posting . copy thereof on the pshlle so9npo6e sn sad Town 0f Thompson neafesf tho pxnoo where the decenscd Isxl dweit.
 Csrtined from Record.
 lsis GEO. $. CROSBY. JuAGs
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23

For 30 years Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound has been the standard remedy for female ills. No sick woman does justice to herself who will not try this famous medicine. Made exclusively from roots and herbs and has thousands of cures to it's credit. - If the slightest trouble appears which
 you do not understand, write to Mrs. Pinkham at Lynn, Mass, for her advice = 1t is freA and alwnyN helDful.
Putnam patriot., 1909-04-23
RURAL. FREE DELIVERY.

NNfa V
 Routes Nc. 2, ! andt Rural Carriers lea,e daily, Sundays and loli- days eseerteh ats.iea. m return al S.lo D. n. Mailahe matter. weivhing pounds or icss sent hy Rural Carriers must be prepaid hy stamps afiscd.
The Idaho Republican. [volume] (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1904-1932, 1909-04-16
LOSS no HUMANE WORKERS.

In the death OF George Thorndikt
Angel president of the Massachusetts
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty
to Animals, and Of its allied organi
cation, the American Humane Educa,
| ton society, the humane cause has
! suffered such loss as it has not been
called upon to mourn in nearly a
generation. A yirile, dominant and
forceful personality was this champ
| ion of our animal friends--a lover OF
peace, a lover of quiet, but generally
| in the thick of battle. 7
1t was natural that the man who.
almost single-handed and alone, built
up the humane organization in Bos-
ton, should have been an egotist. Mr..
Angel was an egotist. No reader of
Our Dumb Animals, the monthly
periodical in which he took SO much
pride, can avoid realizing this. His
ideas, his personal likes and dislikes.
his friendships and enmities, his per-
sonality-and his name--were con-
spicuous on every page. His writings
bristled with the first personal pro-
noun. But there is a form Of egotism
which spells success. Mr.. Angel be-
lieved in himself. Others were moved
to share this belief. 1t was in this
belief that his strength lay, and he
fought for the right as he saw it with
steadfastness and energy which has
been power for righteousness in the
land.
1t is, therefore, with full recogni-
ton of the mans worth, with COM
plete realization of his services to the
causes of our speechless fellow Great
ures, and with deep regret at his
demise, that Our Animal Friends
voices the feelings of his co-work-
ers in New York in extending sym
pathy to the Massachusetts, Society
and the American Humane Education
Society, and sincere message of con-
dolence to Mr.. Angels bereaved
family. 1t is not every one who is
permitted to serve cause with such |
signal devotion for sixteen years be-
yond the four score and ten allotted |
to the average mortal. 1t is not every |
one of whom it may be so aptly and
truly said: well done, thou good |
and faithful servant. Our Animal
Friends, organ of the American S. P.
G. A., New York, Mar 20.
The Idaho Republican. [volume] (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1904-1932, 1909-04-16
In the Matter Of the Petition to Divide
Road District No, s.

The petition in the above entitled
matter coming on this day for hearing
and after consideration 1t is ordered
that said petition be and the same is
hereby granted and the following de-
scribed territory is hereby organized
into a new road district to be known
and designated as Road District No. SO
with boundaries as follows, to-wit:
Beginning at the northwest corner
OF the northeast quarter of Section 4
TIP. south range 81 E. b. M. thence
south to the center Of Section % said
township, thence east miles to the
center of Section rs, thence south to
the south line of Up south range 32
east, thence east to Snake river, thence
up said river to the section line be-
tween sections 32 and 33, TIP. 4'south
range 33 east, thence north about five
miles to the northeast corner of Sec
tion five. said TIP. thence west five and
one half miles to the place of begin
ming.
The Idaho Republican. [volume] (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1904-1932, 1909-04-16
SUGGESTIVE QUESTIONS ON THE SUNDAY SCHOOL
4 LESSON BY REV. DR. LINSCOTT FOR THE INTER-
NATIONAL NEWSPAPER BIBLE STUDY CLUB

/ Verses S-9-What had blinded
saul!
| How ala saul spend the days that
ne was without sight? s4
DIG ne fast because ne had no de-
sire TOT Iood, or was 1t a religious
fast! 4
Is Tasting OF any use In these days
as neip 70 spiritual life?
verses 1O-l2-May the ability to
near God speak, be acquired by all
true CHRISTIANS!
Have you any experience Of God