The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-10-25
NEW YORK A "JAY TOWN?'

From the New York Herold.
 This city is the "jayest" of all jay" towns in the United States
 Of course this assertion will cause indignant New York CTS to bristle up and declare the statement is gross libel. They will declare if the city shows any symptoms of being jay" it is because of the "rubes.' the "come- ons" and the "yaps" who are constant visitors within its gates and who are so charmed with it that they remain and make it their home.
 But protest or no protest, the as sertion can be proved. It Is not nec- essary in order to furnish proof to direct attention to the fact that horse cars, abolish ed long ago in all towns with any pretension to be up date. still are dawdling along New York's streets; that primitive side paddle wheel ferryboats still are used to con vey thousands of persons. to and from their places of business; that gas lamps, curiosities in all modern com munities, still shed all the light ob- tainable in many thoroughfares, or that the city's streets are in so disgraceful condition that small municipalities would blush if like conditions prevailed within their borders.
 It is not because of tn csc material conditions that New York Is declared to be in the lead in "jayness but be- cause it's inhabitants act like ''rubes In their daily walks about the city.
 There is no town in the United States where a crowd can be collected for so little cause as right here in New York. Whether residents of this city are or are not endowed with more than the average curiosity, whether they have more leisure time whether they are of abnormally inouiring minds matters not. The fact re- mains that at the busiest hours and in the most crowded thoroughfares hundreds will assemble at the slightest provocation fin fact, at no provocation at all. Let trolley car blow out fuse on crowded lower Broadway, Park Row or any down. town thoroughfare between 10 a. m. and 4 D. or on upper Broadway Sixth ave nue or any other uptown street between D. m. and midnight, and thousands will assemble and stand to watch and sug- gest how the trouble can be remedied.
 Let a horse fall into an excavation, and thousands of persons will waste their time watching the progress of the work of getting out the animal.
 A few days ago scarlet stains were discovered in front of the Park Row building Two or three men stopped and soon there was a crowd of thousands. Pedestrian traffic was stopped and street cars were blocked until police reserves scattered the "yap' watchers. Had murder been committed? Had window cleaner fallen from some high story when performing his work? These and score of other questions were discussed by the gaping multitude. Even when It was dis covered that the stains were of paint spilled from a workman's pail when he was jostled, those who had not been driven away by the police continued wag- ging their heads and discussing their theories.
 The same day the pavement on Broad way, near St. Paul's church. was dis covered to have big rift in it. Thousands assembled. Again street travel was blocked, and again cars were held up The police once more scattered the crowd Some said an earthquake had caused tho big hole. Others contended the earth was sinking, and not even the official declaration that the rift was due to the escape of gas sufficiently satisfied the gazing "rubes'' to cause them to disperse.
 During the recent strike of telegraphers a bulletin was posted in front of coffee and-cake saloon on Park row about noon each day. No sooner did half a dozen stop to read it than hundreds also halted. Not one in 30 could see the little board, but they stood and stood as if they ex- pected the diminutive bulletin told of some event of great importance.
 A woman fell the other night at the Brooklyn bridge entrance when trying to board a surface car. She was not serious ly hurt. Although the police took her to a waiting room in less than minute after the fall crowd of hundreds how cred round the entrance for half an hour trying to find out what had happened.
 A window cleaner was washing the win dows of one of the top stories of the Tract society's buildings the other day. Two men stopped to look at him. They had hardly began to gaze heavenward be-