The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1908-08-29

"Heie white noWS the river and bright
blows the broom,
And You shall wash your linen and
keep your body white,
In rainfall at morning and dewfau al
night.
And this shall be for music when nc
one else is near,
Inc fine song for singing, the rare song
to hear,
That only 1 remember. that only you
admire,
On the road that stretches and the
roadside fire.
Robert Louis Stevenson.
A patronizing young woman of Gin
cInnati was being shown through a
government school for Indians, when
she came to a fine-looking Indian girl
OF perhaps sixteen years of age. The
indian girl was hemming napkins,
which the girl from Cincinnati watched
Tor some moments in silence Then she
said to the Indian, Are you civilized"
The Sioux raised her head slowly
from her work and glanced coldly at
her interrogation.
No" she replied, as her eyes again
sank to her napkins, ARE you?"
Il suppose you are a pretty good
chauffeur by this time" remarked the
man on the sidewalk
Yes, answered the man at the
steering wheel, Il ran over six people
last week, and never hurt the machine
a bit."-Chicago News.
An acquaintance called on some ladies
IN an Alabama town who haA at the
time been wearied by an apparently
endless succession of callers. The door
was opened by Augustus Butts, the
faithful old butler.
Are the ladies in?" asked the caller.
Z No, ma'am, they'se all OUT
I'm sorry that 1 missed them" con-
tinued the visitor. handing him her
cards. Il particularly wished to see
Mrs. Jones'"
Yes, ma'am, thank yo', ma'am," re-
piled Augustus. "Theyse all out,
lam, and Mrs. Jones is particularly
out, ma'am. "-Argonaut
THE Swelltons seem to keep up an
establishment" remarked the
canned-goods drummer.
You bet they do" replied the gro
Gerry man, with a sign long drawn out,
and I'm one of the fellows they i'm
pose on.''-Chicago News.
Authoress (of the budding VARIETY
| got level with the editor last night.
He always rejects my manuscripts. But
l have had my revenge.
Friend-How did you do it?
Authoress-I declined his son, with
thanks.-Pick-Me-U
The star pupil arose at the school
IN |,
Lend me your earsi" he bawled.
Hal" sneered the mother of the on
position, but defeated pupil. that's
Sarah Jane Baggs' boy. He wouldn't
be his mothers son if he didn't want
to borrow something. Baltimore
American.
IF you'll notice. said Finnick, 1.-The
poets invariably refer to the earth as
She Why should the earth be con-
sidered feminine, I'd like to know?"
Why not?" replied Sinnick NO
body seems to know just how old the
Earth is. '-Philadelphia Press
Mrs. Exe-Good-bye I'm sorry my
husband isn't in. 1 wish l knew some
way of keeping him home a little more.
Mrs. Wye.-Let him buy a motor car.
Mrs. Exe.-Why, he'd be out more
han ever then.
Mrs. Wye-Oh, dear, no! Mrs. Dash
II tells me her husband bought a mo-
or few days ago. and the doctor says
he won't be out for six weeks-IIlus-
rated Bits.
Young DR.. Walker always i'm
pressed me as having nerves of iron. |
Judging by the cool way he performs |
he most serious operations" remarked |
lis friend. but yesterday when l met |
lin in consultation he was the most !
Xcited man l have seen for a long |
While"
at must have been a most unusual
nd extraordinary case.Y
mo; one of the doctors own chill
rem had an attack of measles
An old woman was being questioned
y a lawyer as to how a testator had
Ooked when he made remark to her
bout some relatives.
"Now, how can l remember? He's
cen dead two years." she answered,
estily.
"Is your memory so poor that you
ant remember two years back?" he
ersisted.
The old woman was silent, and the
lwyer asked: Did he look anything
Ike me?"
Seems to tine he did have the same
ort of vacant look" rnsponded the wit
ess.
The lawyer had no further questions
} ask her.
The scimiter of the Saracens was the
lost effective sword for cutting pur-
oses ever devised. 1t will be remem-
cred how, according to the story of
ir Walter Scott's "Talisman," with
lch a weapon the pagan Saladia
lopped a soft cushion in two at one
low, to the amazemenu or Richard
Ter de Lion. With straight sword
ne can make a hack or thrust, but to
ice and adversary one must saw with
The scimiter, being curved and
ide and heavy toward the end, slices
Y the mere fact of striking.
After we've lived a while and gained
,me measure of experience, we come
the conclusion that the most dis
moments OF life are not those
hich depend upon the most momen-
JUS happenings, just as our highest
,ppiness does not come from the Iarg- ,
It occasions for rejoicing. So, in this !
lsiness of life, which is amenable to r
e same laws and rules that hold in
,ture and in business of any special
rt. the whole is simply a combina- NJ