Los Angeles herald., 1908-08-23

|
York Morning Telegraph. 1t was
! signed "Helen Green" who gives time
and place of the action 1910
Monday morning on the stage of a vaude-
The Acrobat-Be a little careful there
| wit our apparatus. Dean JUS remember
that IL" steel amt picked up in the streets
1t can't set there.
| A Stage Hand Qaughingly)-Gotto
Mrs Acrobat-These fellas are simply
dom that from spite, Pete. The last tirpe
eff 1t begins now Pm goin' to the front of
the house an make yelp Performers got
some rights left.
Mabel Morphine (of the Musical Nor
phines)-How long since William Tell"
has been done here?
The Musical Director-The Ziliphones
closed with it last week.
Mike Morphine (bitterly)--D'you get that
MabelY Them people stole some more of
our stun We been playin' it in brass all
season, an spose they Jest about hggered
on beatin' to 1t in this house.
Gertie Flueeer-Say, where's the 'lectri
clan? oh, are you him? Now listen The
| lights kin make or mar my act. you'll
have to try 'em, please. Gimme the food
! first, till fgger If I'll do Salome in the
exact center
The Acrobat-whats the space between
| the proscenium arch. cul?
The Stage Manager-Thirty feet
The Electrician calling from the deep
shadows of the gallery)-Any better?
| Gertie Flutter-over this way more! Gee.
4 L
therel Now gimme the spot. It's green
fur, salome an red fur my Spanish dance.
! The Electrcian--Don't you keer fur
nice yeller?
Gertie Flutter-whadj you say then?
| Mrs. Acrobat-Pete, you stick right here
| by me. Where you goin'?
| The Acrobat OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
| Mrs. Acrobat-Liari You had four drinks
already, cause I smell you. If you git up
| on that platform stewed again today you
Jest git moo partner, fur will not put
doin' head stands when she's liable to be
joggled offa the steps any minnit. You'd
ought to have some feeln.
The Leader Ito the call boy)-Run across
the street and tell Bill to make me one of
those. Put paper over it an set 1t here
on the piano
The Call Boy--Brl amt on It's the
fat guy who allus asks fur the money
cause you won't git him passed in (The
leader reluctantly produces 15 cents.)
Viola Holler (recently of musical comedy
1t don't sound to me that this pianos
concert pitch. l could have had lovely
grand sent up by friend OF NINE but the
manager himself said you had one. I'm
not used to uprights, and It affects my
voice If I get annoyed over such matters.
I'll have to go and smoke a cigarette now
to calm myself.
Mr.. Holler (who accompanies Viola upon
the piano)-My wife's awful temperamental
Have cigar?
The Musical Director (after rapidly OBJ
serving the band)-rhanks, but 1 don't
smoke.
Mrs. Acrobat--we'n have to asst Won TO play
our music very forte, please. All our stur's
quick and snappy an the time before our
turn was simply hacked to pieces by the
orchestry doin' all they could to hurt It,
The Acrobat-Why don't you femme do this
an con him? The ideer is that the drums
got to ketch me at each fall, see? An when
she makes the big swing play a gallop
Viola Holler (now feeling better)-I must be
rehearsed at once, for have an engagement
for lunch with some society friends
Gertie Flutter addressing colored girl-
Lookyhere is 1t SO that you went an told Mis-
Eoller you'd dress her, too?
The Maid-Ah kin do the bofe of you
Gertie Flutter-I never split no maids with
no enc, an won't nowi Moreover. 1 don't
pay six bucks week an then come in an
find the CELL hooking another partyl
Viola Holler-I her first and shall NOT
give her upl
Gertie Flutter-Let your husband fasten your
clothes. It's all he knowsl
The Stage Manager-This is gon' to be a
frolicsome week.
The Acrobat-say, someone went an stuck
our mat in a wet place an now it's an awful
thing. Can't them guys do nothin correct Z?
Mrs Acrobat-They must think we're some
team just blowed in off the Jingle cirkt
The Stage Manager-What's this? That he
longs to the property room. Yours is back
there.
The Acrobat-oh. guess made mistake
Mrs. Acrobat-They'd wet our'n IL they'd
thought of 1t. ! know EN-.
Viola Holler-Mr. Holler's been out front.
and they've got me third in the lobby. If
that Fultter woman is billed above me don't
sing note, contract notl You Just tell
Mr. Smelt the manager, so.
The stage Manager-I can't help II. Settle
1t with him.
Gertie Flutter-I was toppin' bills when she
was carryin' spear in Reilly & Woods big
show.
Stage Hand-SomAtimes wish rd died
before ever comm into this business
The Call Boy-Here's your drink
The Musical Director-G' wan for another
quick A man sure needs EN- around here
who's next? Then throw me your music and
begin.