davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17

Everyone who ever stole hen
knows that chickens will set up an
awful caclSle when you grab one
around the leg and try to put it in a
bag. Also that nothing is so CON
ducive to the unrest of the farmers
dog as a squawk from the hen coop To
circumvent all this unnecessary racket
and attendant embarrassment, Mis-
souri, genius has invented a squirtgun
for hens. The gun is filled with a
Supplying dope and all you have to
do now is to step up close to the roost,
stick the gun under the hens chin and
push the piston Down tumbles biddy
and you chuck her in the bag and go
off before the folks get home from
prayer meeting. Hencoop owners of
Oakland, Mo, have had visits from
the squirtgun expert recently with sad
results. Even the chickens left are so
doped from the fumes that they are
no good for a day or two.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
TRAGEDY OF TURF RECALLED.
Owners Sudden Death Just as His
Horse Won Great Race.

Half an hour before the race for the
Two Thousand Guineas of 1883 Prince
Batthyany, who bred st. Simon and
who was one of the most popular "a
cling men of any time was talking
with Lord Cadogan in the luncheon
room of the Jockey club stand at New
market when he suddenly reeled and
fell, says the Westminster Gazette
He was carried to Weatherbys Office
and doctors were summoned; but the
prince was beyond all human aid, and
just before the bell rang for the race
for which his colt Galliard, brother of
ST Simon, was first favorite, he
breathed his last
A few minutes later "the clear blue
Sky rang with cheers and shouts as
the horses came laundering along,
which rose into a roar as Galliard won
by head;' While behind the drawn
blinds of Weatherby's office Galliard's
owner who had been looking forward
so eagerly to this moment, was lying
dead. 1t was owing to the death of his
owner that Galopins great son could
not run in the Derby of 1884, which
he would almost certainly have won.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Ruskin as a Chess PLAYER

Many people may have overlooked
the fact that Ruskin loved the game
of chess Some of his letters reveal
this interest He was at one time a
constant visitor to Maskelyne &
Cookies entertainment, where he once
played a game with Psyche" and he
tried his skill against other chess au-
tomato. Indeed, it was a matter OF
pride to him." say his latest editors,
that he had obtained more than one
victory over the famous Mephisto at
the time when it was performing at
the Crystal palace with considerable
eclat. He was vice-president of the
British Chess association"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
WHEN ONE DOES BEST WORK.
Time Varies with the Occupations of
the Worker.

The records give an average age of
so for the performance of the master
work. For the workers the average is
AZ and for the thinkers 50. Chemists
and physicians average the youngest
at Al; dramatists and playwrights,
poets and inventors follow at "A nov
elists give an average of 46; explorers
and warriors, AZ; musical composers
and actors, As; artists and divines oc-
cupy the position of equilibrium at so;
essayists and reformers stand at 81;
physicians and surgeons line up with
statesmen at 50; philosophers give an
average of 81; astronomers and mathe-
maticians, satirists and humorists
reach SO; historians, 81, and natural
lists and iurists So. AS may be noted,
there is a REIMBURSEMENT of the or
der at this time, but the thinkers, as
before, and as would naturally be eX-
pected, attain their full maturity at
a later period than the workers. The
corolary is evident. Provided health
and optimism remain the man of so
can command success as readily as
the man of so. Health plus optimism
read the secret of success; the one
God-given, the other Unborn, but also
capable of cultivation to the point of
enthusiasm.-Centu
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
HOTEL MAN HAD A CONSCIENCE
His Letter, with Enclosure, surel,
Proved the Fact.

Whoever says that hotel men are
without conscience will have an adj
versary in a young advertising man.
He was at one place up in the noun
tains the other week and determined
to stay all night. Before dinner he
complained of slight headache TO
the proprietor, but the remark was
passed apparently without notice He
ate a big meal, but did not enjoy it
much because of his headache
Next day he moved on to his next
stop, and upon his return to the city
was surprised to find a letter from the
proprietor of the house where he had
spent the night. 1t said: Through an
act of carelessness on my part | al
lowed you to eat the regular dinner
the other night-a dinner not suited
for a man with headache. Now
should have prepared some eggs and
toast and tea for you, but | allowed
you to eat something you did not en-
joy. 1t is, therefore, my duty to apollo
gize, and to make restitution for the
same In the envelope containing the
letter was a quarter.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
An upner Berth.

A professor in the university of
Berlin who came over here year ago
was much surprised the first time
when he Travelled in sleeping car
to be asked by the porter for his berth
ticket My birth ticket?" he said;
Il have my passport, have my letter
of credit and have even in my trunk
my certificate Of vaccination; but why
the railroad company should want my
birth ticket do not see" But" said
the porter, Il must know whether you
have upper or lower BERTH" Upper,
of course" said the German. Look
at my passport; Goes it not say well
and highly borne"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Saaacltx of Horses

An interesting story of the sagacity
OF horses comes from a provincial
French town. The chargers of a
squadron of dragons had been taking
bath in The river, and the troopers
were looking on while they were in
the water when suddenly some so
of them returned hurriedly to the
bank, and ere they could be stopped
had dashed in different directions. The
dragons went in search of the fugi-
tives. At last, however. they gave it
up in despair, and so returned crest
fallen to their barracks, to find that
every one of the runaways had got
back to the stables without so much
as scratch among the whole lot.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Height of Land, Depth of Sea.

The mean height of all the land now
above the sea is referred to by Lyeli
as being LOCO feet. The mean depth
of the ocean is at least 10000 feet,
that is, it exceeds the height of the
land IL times.
This is because the extreme heights
of the land, although probably no less
than the extreme depths of the sea,
yet are exceptional heights, while the
ocean maintains it's depth over enor-
nous areas.
Owing to the fact that the surface OF
the ocean to that of the land is as two
and half to one the ocean would ac-
commodate the whole of land go times
over We're it all pitched into the ocean
areas.-From knowledge and Scientific
News
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Before His pav of Power.

There is preserved in the archives
of Theatre Francois in Paris card
which reads: Pass the Citizen Bona
parte to this evenings performance of
Manlius. -Talma." This shows that
the Emperor Napoleon, when he was
only an olive-complexion lieutenant of
artillery, and had very little money to
spend, was very glad of passes to the
theater. 1t is said that the future
ruler of France used to lie in wait for
Talma, tragedian of that day, in the
galleries of the Palais Royal, and that
the actor used often to whisper to his
companion: THE other way, if you
don't mind. | see Bonaparte coming
and I'm afraid he'll ask me for seats. )"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Career of Felix Adler.

Felix Adler, the well-known in
structor and lecturer, was born in
Alley, Germany, August 10, 1851. the
son of Jewish rabbi He came to
America in early life and was gradu-
alter from Columbia college in 1870,
and subsequently studied at Berlin
and Heidelberg, obtaining the degree
of Phi. ID. After his return to the
United States he was professor of
Hebrew and oriental literature at Cor
nell university from 1874 to May, 1876
when he established a new religious
society in New York called the So
ciety of Ethical Culture, to which he
invariably speaks every Sunday.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Never Too Old.

A Welsh paper tells of family in
Wales where the father is SO years old,
the mother SO and the youngest of
three children, all unmarried and liv-
ing at home, is As When these Chill
dren" misbehave they are cuffed and
switched the same as if they were only
ten years old. The father was switch
ing a son Of 60 when the reporter
called at the house, for the offence of
having spilled some milk on the floor.
An American boy may be glad that he
wasn't born in Wales
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
FERMENTATION for knowledge,

No man can learn what he has not
preparation for learning, however near
to his eyes is the subject A chemist
may tell his most precious secrets to a
carpenter, and he shall be never the
wiser-the secrets he would not utter
to a chemist for an estate God
screens us evermore from premature
ideas. Our eyes are holden that we
can not see things that stare us in the
face until the hour arrives when the
mind is ripened; then we behold them,
and the time when we saw them not
is like dream.-Emerson
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Kinds Of Storms

There is distinct difference be-
tween cyclones, tornadoes and hurri-
canes. The ordinary windstorms
which visit the United States are prop
erly cyclones and they usually come
from the northwest or southwest.
Hurricanes never come from the
northwest, but usually from the south
or southeast. The tornado is the most
violent of all storms and is character
lied by pendant, funnel-shaped cloud
with rapid rotary motion 1t moves
In a narrow path at from Is to GO
miles an hour. The rotary velocity is
enormous, being from 100 to 500
miles an hour
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Music in the Air.

A revolving piano and pianist ma
king music in midair is one of the la
test attractions at the New York
hippod.ome The exhibition is de.
scribed as Hindu mystery" Under
a show of hypnotic influence both
piano and pianist rise up from plat
form, and having, by some unknown
agency, reached certain height, the
instrument begins to sway from side
to side. and in due course is seen
swiftly revolving, together with the
performer, to the strains of the Merry
Widow waltz. The performer, it is
said, never misses a note, even while
upside-down.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
South Africa Becoming United.

England's dream of a united South
Africa is coming true. The premiers
of Cape Colony, the Transvaal and the
in their respective legislative assem-
blies, the adoption of the resolution
of the intercolonial customs and rail
way conference calling for an early
union under the British crown. Natal
is no whit behindhand and the reso-
luton of the conference specially re-
ferred to the inclusion of Rhodesia
in the great South Africa state at a
convenient opportunity.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
There the Difference Lies.

1t will always remain a matter of
dispute as to whether one person has
right to say to another that she
shall not work more than a certain
number of hours each day The So
ciety woman goes about her avoca-
lions and her pleasures as many hours
as she pleases, and often to the detri-
ment of her health and that of her
children, but would consider it ques-
dared to make a law requiring her to
stop working OF playing at a certain
time.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
PERILs OF LIFE IN TROPICS.
Animals and Reptiles Alike invade
Rest and Comfort There.

The perils of daily life in the trop-
les are almost inconceivable to dwell
ers in other climes. In Borneo vii
la&e, man and his ten-yearold son
We're sleeping in their house inside a
mosquito netting. They We're on the
floor near the wall In the middle of
the night the father was awakened by
his son calling out 1t was totally
dark and the father passed his hand
over his son, but found nothing amiss,
so he turned over and went to sleep
again. thinking the boy was dream
ing. Shortly afterward the child again
called out, saying that crocodile
was taking him. This time the ia
Their, thoroughly aroused, lighted a
lamp, and found that snake had
closed it's jaws on the boys head. He
shouted, and the snake, releasing its
hold, drew the whole of its body into
the house and enciroled the body OF
the father. He was rescued by the
neighbors, who were attracted by the
cries for help of the terrified couple.
The snake when killed was found to
be 10 feet long, and the head and fore
head OF the boy was surrounded with
a circle of punctured wounds produced
by the python's teeth
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Steam to Heat Electric Cars.

Provision is made for heating the
electric trains of the New York Cen
trail by means of steam, which is gen.
Grated in a small oil-fired boiler To-
Gated in the engineers cab. The boil
ers are short vertical shells, each
containing 500 halfinch copper tubes,
which are mounted on cast iron, brick
lined ireboXes. Ordinary commercial
fuel oil is used, carried in 40-gallon
tank in the cab.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
FACTS FOR SICK WOMEN.

For thlrty Years Lydia u. Pmk-
hams Vegetable Compound, made
from roots and herbs, has been the
standard remedy for female ills,
and has positively cured thousands of
women who have been troubled with
displacements, inflammation, ulcera-
ton, fibroid trlmors, irregularities,
periodic pains, backache, that bear
ing-doWn feeling, fatulency, indiges-
ton, dizziness, OF nervous prostration.
Why don't you try it?
Mrs. Pinlxham invites all sick
women to write her for advice.
She has guided thousands to
health. Address, Lynn, Mass.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Slaughtered for Fashion.

At auctions in London during the
last half of 1907 there were catalogued
for sale 1912 skins and plumes of
many other birds of beautiful plumage
including albatross quilts and the tails
of the lyre-birds. In the state of New
York is law forbidding the sale or
possession of any bird or part of the
plumage of a bird, with the exception
of certain named species, unless under
the license of a special certificate.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Monument for L,Enfant.

The commissioners of the District
of Columbia have determined to ex-
hume the remains of Maj. Pierre
Charles L'Enfant, which lie buried on
the Riggs farm, in Prince Georges
county, Maryland, eight miles north of
Washington, and to renter them on
the campus of the Catholic university.
A monument will be placed over the
new grave.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
AS Related to Us.

Big Steve Callahan is the author of
this story:
4 asked a friend of mine where l
could purchase little solid food, and
he assigned me to one of these new
tangled serve-self cafes. l got my own
dish of beans, my own plate of bread
and butter, my own cup of coffee and
carried it all to my own seat and ate it
all my own self. Then the thought
struck me that | was first-rate waiter
and could join the union, so | sought
out the proprietor of the place, and
said to him: Now, then, if you'll show
me the proper place Ill wash my own
dishes. Detroit Free Press.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
"Without."

"I'd like glass of plain effervescing
drink" said thirsty man. you hat
vanilla, or you hat raspberry" asked
the young woman-a Teuton behind
the counter. Il want plain drink. no
favoring -understand me?" responded
the thirsty man, testify. "Yas, but
vat kind favoring you want him nit
out? Mitout vanilla, or mitout rasp-
berry?"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Arkansas Large Peach Orchard.

Arkansas claims to have the largest
peach orchard in the world and 1000
men and 300 teams are harvesting the
crop The orchard is in Sewer coun-
ty and has 100000 trees. 1t covers
$500 acres and trees on 1000 acres
are bearing. Five hundred freight
cars will be used to haul the crop
to market.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-09-17
Perplexed.

Larry-Phwat do yez think thot mon
wild tn shaving-mug face sizz to me?
Denny-Phwat?
Larry-Phoy, he hod tn audacity to
say his face was mirror av moine.
Denny-Th' nerve av him. Phoy
didn't yez break his face?
Larry-How could Oh? Amt it bad
luck to break mirror?
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
REFEREE IS APPOINTED
Will Take Testimony in Hart
Disbarnlent Case.
yUSTIFIEs HIS STATEMENTS
At Preliminary Hearing Accused At
torney Does Not Withdraw Crit
icism of Supreme Court.

Francis B. Hart of Minneapolis ap-
peared at ST. Paul before the spe-
cial supreme court appointed by Gov
ment proceedings brought against him
by the state board of law exskniners
for his criticism of the supreme court.
Mr.. Hart not only did not offer to
withdraw or modify any of the state
ments complained of, but sought to
justify them on the ground that they
were truthful statements and that in
making them he had not been guilty of
any violation of his duty as an attor-
ney at law He insisted that he was
prepared to stand by his statements.
After the court had overruled his
objection to the petition, which was
based on the ground that 1t does not
allege facts sufficient to constitute an
offense, the court appointed ex-Lieu-
tenant Governor Gideon S. Ives of ST.
Paul referee to take. the testimony in
the proceedings and set March 10 as
the date for the final hearing in the
matter. The taking of testimony will
commence at, Mr.. Ives Office on Jan.
Is. Upon the conclusion Of the evil
dence in chief of the prosecution the
respondent will be granted, if he Sc
requests, ten days in which to pre-
pare his defense. The prosecution will
be required to serve its brief on the
respondent by Feb Is and both briefs
must be filed in the court not less than
three days prior to the final hearing
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
A PRIVATE ENTERPRISE.
Court So Declares Minnesota univer-
sity Athletic Association.

The University Athletic association
is a private and not a state institu-
ton. This has been decided in de-
cision handed down by Judge Brown in
the Hennepin county district court in
the case of Edward E. George VS.. the
University of Minnesota Athletic as
ISOLATION, in which the plaintiff sought
to recover damages because Of injuries
sustained at game at the univer-
sity field last fall
Upon the filing of the complaint the
state demurred, claiming under the
statutes and constitution the state
could not be made defendant in action
for damages
The theory was that the state, being
all the people, could not be sued by
one of itself
Arguments were lengthy, but in
making his decision the court allows
the complaint and the case will come
to trial under the theory that the as
ISOLATION is private enterprise and
has nothing to do with the university
or the state.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
CAR HITS BOBsLED.
Six People Injured, Two Seriously,
Near South St. Paul.

Six People Injured, Two Seriously,
Near South St. Paul.
Six people were injured, two Of
them seriously, by an Inver Grove
street car. A company of twelve was
returning to South st. Paul from Inver
Grove, where they had gone for bob
party as guests of Fred Scofield, who
was driving. Shortly before reaching
Riverside the sled was run down by
the car that runs from Inver Grove to
South ST. Paul
The bob had been running on the
street car tracks. Mr.. Scofield and
the party saw the car approaching
rapidly, but could not turn out quick
ly because of the tracks. ALI the oc-
cupants of the bob were thrown out,
several of them some distance Mr..
Scofield chung to the lines of the four
mules hauling the bob and was
dragged a considerable distance, tear
ing a cash in his head and suffering
severe bruises.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
ADMITS FALSE ENTRIES.
Employ. Of Defunct Frisco Trust Com
pany confesses.

pdHy NohTeSSeS.
San Francisco, Jan. 3.-Another
sensational chapter was added to the
California Safe Deposit and Trust
company scandal when H. T.. Storrs,
one OF the bookkeepers of the con-
eern, broke down under a merciless
eross-examination and confessed that
abe false entries in the books were in
his handwriting and had been made
under orders from J. Dalzell Brown,
the imprisoned manager of the bank,
and J. D. Robertson, the fugitive as
sistant secretary.
The confession made by Storrs was
complete in every respect and estab-
lished the fact that nearly $l,000,OOO
had been falsely added to the assets
of the bank in order to deceive the
state commissioners More than $780,.
900 had been fraudulently added to
the accounts of Brown, Walter j. Bart.
nett and the San Francisco and San
Joaquin Coal company alone. In or.
der to balance the books Storrs said
that like sum had been charged
against depositors in the bank.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
CAPTAIN PILLsBURY NAMED
Succeeds Admiral Brownson as Head
of Navigation Bureau.

Washington, Jan. 2-After a con-
ference with President Roosevelt Sec
Rotary Metcalf announced that Cap
tain J. Il. Pillsbury had been selected
as chief of the navigation bureau of
the navy department. Captain Pills.
bury participated in the conference
between the president and the secre-
tary just prior to the announcement.
The selection of Captain John
Pillsbury to be chief Of the bureau of
navigation is at best only a temporary
one, unless the president should de-
eide to again have recourse to the ex-
pedient Of commissioning retired
officer as chief of the bureau. Cap
tain Pillsbury was born in Lowell,
Mass, Dec. is, 1916, and will conse-
quently have to retire on account of
age Dec. 10 next.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-01-08
RECEIVERS ARE APPOINTED
Seaboard Air Line Unable to
Meet Fixed Charges.

Richmond, Va, Jan. a Judge
Pritchard of the United States court
has entered decree naming s. Davies
Warfield of Baltimore and r. Lancas-
ter Williams of Richmond as receiv-
ers to take immediate possession of
the property of the Seaboard Air Line
railroad. The bond of each was fixed
at $4,000.
BY the decree the receivers are en-
powered to borrow money, If needful,
to pay such rental as may become
due; purchase cars, etc, and pay for
labor and supplies, but not for any
other purpose without an order of the
court having primary jurisdiction.
The placing Of the Seaboard Air
Line system in the hands of receivers
follows statement of the companys
earnings showing s3,1s2,S36 on hand
with which to meet fixed charges of
s3,175,43 deficit of $42,598 It has
been known for several days that
some steps would be necessary to
protect the property in view of it's
inability to meet it's fixed charges and
the receivership was agreed upon at
conference held in Washington at
which there were present representa-
tives of both the majority and minor
ity stockholders.