Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1908-05-20

orator is let down from his pinnacle
and expends his energy in loud talk in
his immediate vicinity. until some
low-browed gentleman advises h'm to
cut it out" at the Same time casting
perfectly annihilating look in his
direction.
The old stagers always enjoy these
interludes. They smile grimly. get \
fresh grip ON their cigars and elevate
the weeds reminiscently in n skyward
angle. They keep watchful cognizance
when their wards are about to he
reached and. IL chairmen. rise In.
stanty at the word. shout clearly tho
vote and, whether IL be recorded
right or wrong, they settle down
| stoically into the attitude OF mere
spectators. Far be 1t from them to
boiler If the cards are stacked"
against them. They would do the
same &c they had the power. The
other fellows have the whip-hand to.
day: when it shifts. they Will give
their opponents the same dose. But
10 cavort around on the floor wailinn
out "Meestair Chairmannn," not for
them. They are too wise to resort to
such puerile foolishness.
Nothing can exceed the perfect re.
| pose which marks the proceedings as
| relates to the officers and head men
who have 1t in charge. There is not
n shadow OF smile on the counte-
nances of the chairman and his assist.
ants and the bosses" move around
on the floor OF the convention or rs.
cend to the platform with an entirely
serious and virtuous air which would
indicate extreme self-sacrifice and the
most absolute fairness to their CD
ponents
But once the business is concluded
over the cigars and cocktails these
genial gentlemen will unbend and 70.
late delightedly and with rare .humoY
the amusing comedies played on the
convention floor. They have remem
bered the very voices and gestures OF
! the reformers and patriots, they can
initiate, and perfectly, the surprised
scream OF the plundered delegation. or
the stentorian yawp of the hard boiled
orator. They enjoy these things With
the gusto OF the connoisseur. the DO
litical bon vivant. But at the hall. and
In the midst of the carnage, they are
as suave as panthers and as remorse
less as cannibals. Everything goes
In politics." is their motto. that IN
everything but honesty.
Coming back from my last political
convention l met Jack Derby in the
smoker" Jack was from the ward
next to mine, md had missed him
Just before the voting began. I had
noticed stranger in his seat when I
came In rather late, but still I'm time
10 vote. Jack was moody and his head
was done up In gaudy handkerchief.
what's up" ] said to him. II didn't
see you when the votes were being
cast"
They thrun me out" was his re-.
IVY I vert over to see a friend O
niue In the fourteenth and when got
back TO me seat they was a guy there
In H. l grabbed him and he caught
hold OF me arms. The sarge" User.
geant-at-arms) came runnin' I'D an
this guy gives him the wink an says
this feller's a pick-pockct Before Z
could hand him one the Sarge" grabs
inches seven feet long and four feet
| throush--and he wings me To- the door
In four jumps and fires me by the neck
and pants. See? An I lose me vote
an ] don't get In the hall again"
That's tough, Jack" was my con-
solatory reply.
Tough said Mr.. Derby. with an
| injured air, AN / was goin' TO vote
right all the time. ! think that ser.
geant must be bugs"
ERNEST MGAFFEY.