The Intermountain Catholic. (Salt Lake City [Utah] ;) 1899-1920, 1908-03-21
DOCTOR CAPTAIN
EXHAUSTS SKILL
Absorbent Cotton Fails to Stop Leak
and Ship Founders.


SCENE-Off Hatteras on a stormy
night. Laboring heavily in the gale is
the hospital ship First Aid. L. S. y.
Inc doctor-captain, the doctor-lieuten-
ant commander and the doctor-licuten-
ant IN command of the ship by virtue
OF president Roosevelt's new order are
hoIolng a consultation in what they
can the administration Office other
wise the captains cabin.
The lieutenant (anxiously-Wha the
deuce makes her shake so?
Inc lieutenant commander dubious
ly)-l cannot diagnose whethe" she has
ague or paralysis agitans.
The captain with decision) Order
the nurses to sprinkle the decks with
equal parts of quinine and strychnia.
mat should stop the muscular trenl-
Dllns, whether it's due to malaria OF
to some brain lesion.
Head nurse (entering excitndly)-
Doctor, the chief mechanic reports
that the main pump is disabled and
won't pump. The valves -
Inc lieutenant (interrupting)-Mi
or ventrical?
The lieutenant commander excited
ly)-Heart failure.
The captain latter reAection)-Tell
him to give the pump a hypodermic
injection of whisky and digitalis. That
must stimulate its action. Nurse
turns to go.) And, nurse, ask the
lookout what his prognoSis is as to our
distance from land.
The lieutenant (feverishly}--And take
the temperature, nurse.
Head nurse (returning)-The temper-
allure is way below normal, doctor, and
the wind is breathing strongly but fit
fully. The chief cabinatmaker reports
she Is leaking badly on the left side
near the sailors bedrooms.
The captain tossing him a little box
of absorbent cotton)-C1iVe him this.
(Writing hurriedly) And here's an
order on the apothecary for a roll of
bandage and dozen inch strips of adj
hesive plaster. With these simple REM
edies 1 once checked a hemorrhagc
which every other surgeon DIT the bed
side said would be fatal.
The lieutenant (apprehansively)-I
don't like the patients condition at
all. Gracious, hear her groau.
The lieutenant commander (sugges-
tively)-A little morphia would quiet
her, surely.
Head nurse (reappeaTing)-Doct
somebody or other says she has two
feet of water in her forehead.
The lieutenant (excitedly)-1n her
forehead? She must have hydrocepha-
lus.
The lieutenant commander ,dis-
gustedly)-She's dropsical, by Jove!
The captain (serenely)--You ought
to know, doctor, that dropsy is only a
symptom. In this case. it is caused,
undoubtedly by the failure of the
pumps action. AS 1 said before, our
whole endeavor must be to stimulate
that action. Heroic treatment is need
ed. Nurse, place a demijohn of whis-
ky, quart of extract of digitalis and
three tanks of oxygen alongside the
pump and tell the chief engineer we
will be there in few minutes.
lawful crash on deck Plainly, the
First Aid needs it herself).
First lieutenant idespairingIy)
Good gracious. she's in collapse.
Head nurse Crushing in)-Please
doctor, an awful big wave hit her. One
of the chimneys tumbled and fractured
Able-Seaman Marlinspike's skull,
hot water pipe burst and scalded a
machinist and Nurse Pilster fell down
the back stairs and broke his left fe-
muir. They're being put 10 bed; the
the splints, the bandages
are ready. Will you come as soon as
possible, doctor?
The captain Gmperiously)-Se the
ships carpenter to the patients, nurse.
We are engrossed in navigation. Cen
tlemen-surgeons I think you will
agree with me that our patient is in
articulo mortis. But we should have
had a veterinary surgeon on beard
she is about to founder.
(The good ship founders).