davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Whitehouse
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n HERE was great excitement in
/ Washington when it was reported
the other day that Pete, the bulldog,
had returned.
Pete was the pet who almost started
war between the United States and
the rest of the world by tearing the
trousers of diplomats. At one time he
had the United States army on the
run in the person of the secretary of
war.
Pete disappeared some time ago,
and diplomats, cabinet members and
senators, knowing how much the
president thought of him. called at
the White House to offer condolences,
coming out all smiles.
Then came the report that Pete had
reappeared. Only strangers entered
the White House grounds after this re.
port became current. The president
himself was one Of the most inter.
ested. He said If Pete had returned
it was twentieth century miracle.
So he Investigated.
The investigation developed that
Thomas r. Stone, veteran usher at the
White House. had q brindle bulldog
which he has named Pete in honor Of
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
r He postmaster generals name

r He postmaster generals name is
George Won Lengerke Meyer. 1t
would be supposed that most Amer
leans, especially those having business
with this particular cabinet officer,
would be able to get the name right.
But they aren't. Any number of
Americans can't pronounce the presi-
dents name, but it is not matter of
precision of pronunciation in connec-
ton with that Of Mr.. Meyer. The
won" fascinates the throng. They
can't get away from it.
They know that German with a
won" before his last name is noble,
and this proposition looms large in
their conceptions of the postmaster
general. George v. L. Meyer" &C. v.
L. Meyer and George Won L. Meyer
are the various ways the officials
name appears on departmental papers,
and that should be sufficient to secure
accuracy in address and speech. But
it isn't. The L." or "Lengerke" are
half the time ignored, and the magic
proposition won" prefixed directly to
the family name, so that the postmas.
ter general often receives letters ad.
dressed to George Won Meyer" post.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08

A CCORDING to Uncle Joe Cannon,
"a his one great consuming ambi.
ton is not to be president of the
United States, but to have a grand
funeral at public expense-not yet a
while, of course. He confided his am
bition to a few congressional friends
on the occasion of q recent dinner.
He took it up sectionally. He went
back to the first term he served in
congress and how he felt particularly
glum one day. Hale of Maine, then in
the house, read his thought.
Cannon" said Hale, you're think.
ing about resigning right now or re-
firing as soon as your term expires.
But you won't. Pretty soon you'll get
word that some fellow out your way is
a candidate for your job and then you'll
get mad and insist on keeping it for
yourself
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Why Uncle Joe Cannon Clings to His Job

That's what happened. Uncle Joes
ambition for congressional honors re.
vived and he returned to the house.
After he had served a few terms and
was just about ready to throw the
pesky job over, some one out his way
announced that as congressman
Uncle Joe" had been a failure and
that some one else ought to be nomi-
mated. That quickened his pulses
once more and again he sought the,
nomination and election which but for
interference he might have spurned.
Thus it went, until his influence in the
house began to wax until important
chairmanships came his way, until the
speakership was in sight.
"And now" concluded the speaker.
my highest ambition is to be a men,
Der of the house as long as live, to
die during session of congress, and
to be buried at the public expense with
all you fellows at the funeral discus
sing, with bated breath, the question
of my successor
Not word, not single word, dur
Ing the entire dinner, about that other
high ambition which is ascribed to
him as faVOrite son of Illinois
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
The Postmaster General and His Name

master General Won Meyer" ora par
ticular detestation-"Gen.v Won Meyer"
which has field-marshally sound,
suggesting clanking sabers and a
charge to the death. Letters so ad-
dressed come from persons who
Should know better-officials and 9TH
ers close to the public affairs of the
nation.
It is by no means infrequent for
callers at the postoffice department to
ask with a flourish: rs Mr.. Won Mey.
err in?"
A magazine which pretends to ma
tional Importance and is always filled
with accounts of Washington affairs
recently printed full-page picture of
the postmaster general and labeled it
in large type POSTMASTER General Won
Meyer" And the magazine is pub.
lished in Boston, whence Mr.. Meyer
halls. A card in one of the elevators
of the postoffice department was
brought up to date by one of the EN-.
ployes, who, wher the cabinet change
came, crossed out the name of Mr..
Cortelyou and substituted won Mey.
err" The card hung undisturbed for
months and may be there yet. It is
interesting to wonder how this error
arose and why it persists. There is
apparently no good reason for it ex-
cept carelessness in observation or a
habit Of grandiloquence. But the
postmaster general is evidently
doomed to remain won Meyer" to
large number of Americans, since
remedy seems to be lacking.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08

you on board and your craft ship
shape" remarks Anstruther. Let me
carry that rifle of yours
"Come!" says Barnes, to whom
every minute seems an hour, and hur-
ries down the path; but as Edwin fol-
lows, Marina's white arms Irvine round
him close, tight and clinging as if they
couldn't let him 60.
Don't fear for me, you trembling
DEAR" whispers her husband, kissing
the excited face. I'll be back soon."
At the landing, Barnes finds he has
quite little to do paying the Italian
fishermen to remain on shore as Ora
ham is getting their stores and water
properly arranged on the craft. OF
this Anstruther now takes charge, but
though he works with will, it is al
most half an hour before the young
naval officer pronounces the fishing
vessel shipshape in case of heavy
weather
Then the young English officer leads
the American aside and says, with the
| craft of seaman: Under this pres
ent breeze, if those devils you're in
pursuit of want to make their island
quickly, they'll be compelled to strike
it's northwest coast somewhere near
Porto. Graham will know how to
steer the course. I'd go with you,
but"
But your first duty is here to pro-
tect your wife"
you think these devils haven't all
gone away; that there is still danger
for herr"
Eyes, keep sharp eye on your
loved one. That was my error"
means Burton. Il left Enid out of my
sight for only few minutes"
Then good-by," says the sailor hur-
riedly, and wringing Barnes hand,
strides up the path to Lady Chartris'
villa.
Then Burton stepping on board the
fishing lugger, which is big enough to
make the run to Corsica, they would
Immediately throw of their moorings
to the little landing stage, but the
Italian padrone of the craft, noting
Barnes haste seems great and his
need extreme, steps up and demands
additional recompense from the Amer
lean MILFORD for his vessel, declaring
he will not let her 60 until he has
more money; that his ship may be
wrecked at sea and he has no insur-
ance.
PAY him." mutters Barnes impa.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
6eardIess Man,

There is so.called "smooth-shaven"
millionaire in New York who neve,
used a razor on his face. Twenty
five years ago he was a monomanias
on the subject of saving time, and
among other short cuts to fortune
made up his mind to cut out shaving,
matter of Is cents a day and about
20 minutes Of precious time, if the
barber made good. After a trial Of
various cosmetics and depilatories he
decided that electrolysis was a far
better, though very tedious, process,
In five months the root of every hair
In both beard and mustache was Ut
terly destroyed by an electric current
from constant battery. The man
suffered considerably, but ever since
the operation his face has been az
smooth as a bald head. No power
on earth could restore his beard now.
New York Press.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Women Lobbyists Are Most Unpopular

embrasures low-toned conversations
are going on between members and
outsiders.
Some of the latter get date for a
visit to the members Office. Others
get shake of the head.
The women are still further away.
Their lobby is z corner of Statuary
hall.
The marble columns partly shut It
away from the main hall, and there
are chairs and table where the wom-
en- write their pathetic, apologize
notes. Many of them are in mourn
ing; their eyes are frightened and ap.
pealing. Others are plainly pests; the
kind that are always getting some
thing and always wanting something
more.
It's not always clear to a congress-
man which he hates worse to see, the
penniless woman who is absolutely in
competent to do anything much ex.
cept starve, or the woman who is al.
ways nagging him for another job.
The first one makes him sorry for
her. The second makes him sorry for
himself. Both sensations are uncom.
Portable, and the consequence is that
he very often tries to shirk the whole
experience by not going out at all in
response to these cards and notes.
AS a capitol employe said: Say,
that corner over there makes me have
the blues to beat the band. Them wom-
en- in their black dresses, waitin' an
waitin' for congressman that's prob
ably hidin' in a cloakroom for the spe-
cial purpose of dodgin' an interview
with 'em, would drive a married man
to drink or to the life insurance COM
pany."
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
tiently, and hands hi, pocketbook to

Graham.
But payment takes some time, the
light of the lantern not being very
good and the Italian inspecting every
bill to see its value and again greedily
imploring for more money, stating
that his men will desert him If no
gives them not speedy employment.
"Give him what he asks" cries Bur-
ton again; then pauses and mutters:
Good Cod" and springs on shore!
For shout has rung out through the
night air from Lady Chartris' villa and
there is terror in it, and he knows it
is the voice of the stout-nerved An
struther, who would not give cry un-
less some sudden and uncanny despair
had come upon him.
The American rushes up the path
and a few steps from the door almost
runs against Edwin. In the darkness
the frenzied men seize each other, for
Anstruther is now as frantic as him
self. Recognizing him, Barnes asks:
whats the natter"
by heaven! Another blow in the
dark! My wife has gone also!"
Marina? Impossible! You have
looked the grounds over? You have
searched the house?" ....
Here's note from her, left In he1
chamber, begging me to forgive her
saying it is to save my life."
my God, what horrible plot IL II
that has bereft us both in a moment?'
asks Barnes. IF she had only told
you the contents of that devilish let
ter"
The two are in the hall together, in
their anguish, their voices ring out
loudly. A frightened.eyed, shortskirt
ed creature runs to them, and trem
blingly asks: did you want Marina's
Knockout letter very much, Barnsey:
The last part of it,"
1T was perhaps Ends life, perhaps
the life of Edwin's BRIDE"
''Well, then, I-I-oh, forgive me!
lied to you. I've got the letter-the
last part of it; was going to sell II
to you for marrons glaces-Tn get II
for you. 1t is tucked in my lucky
stocking for fear mall see it. It sale
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08

Cost Of Distinguishing Forest Fires.
In 1906 only one-eighth of one per
cent. Of the national forests was
burned over, and only three-one-hun-
dredths of one per cent, actually de-
stroyed. In all, LOO separate fires
were extinguished by the forest ran
gers. Any one of these, If left to burn
itself out, as has been the national
habit, would probably have developed
into an old-fashioned conflagration.
And the total cost of prevention was
$9,000.-American Magazine.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08

| something about murder! Pll-oh,
don't look at me so awful"
Maud flies upstairs and a moment
later dashes back bringing the portion
of the epistle.
AS they try to decipher its cramped
foreign hand, Lady Chartris, coming
out wildly from her chamber, for now
she fears she will be abducted herself,
and is half crazy with fright, sud.
denly, looking over their shoulders,
cries, half shrieking: "Oh, heavens,
Cipriano's writing!"
"You are sure?'
Il fear, fear! I've got three love
notes from him-this looks quite like
his hand
And the astounded and dismayed
widow wrings her hands, her face
pallid with jealous chagrin.
''This is the most crafty, subtle and
satanic plot against your married hap.
piness, Edwin" whispers Barnes. "As
near as I can make out, this devilish
missive says that Marina must desert
you, her accursed English husband:
then they will spare your life. II she
remains with you, your fate VI: be
hers. Your safety from death 10 aIer.
ed as bride to your young wife If she
deserts your bed and leaves herself
open to the stilletos of these devils.
II she stays with you and clings to
you, you will be assassinated, even in
her arms
Then the wife of my heart has left
me fearing as the attack upon my sis.
ter's liberty has been successful their
efforts against my life will be equally
so," shudders Edwin; next cries out
almost angrily: "She was mad not
to trust me-
Marina knew you wouldn't let her
go if she did," suggests Burton more
calmly.
ITO RE CONTINUED
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Plan to Utilize Glacial Waters.

The plan to utilize the glacial wa.
tiers OF the Val Gamma in Italy in.
wolves about 100000 horsepower. 1t
will be obtained by works on the
Gratascolo, the Dezzo. the Torbiole
and Lake Arno. A tunnel 2,406 yards
through rock will take the water from
the lake to the discharging reservoir.
Four series Of iron pipes will conduct
it to Fresine, where $4,000 horsepower
will be generated. At Cedegolo co.
900 horsepower will be produced. A
tunnel 1850 yards long through q
mountain will conduct the waters Of
Lake Salarno into the Aruo.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
More liuht Needed.

People are now demanding more
powerful lights, using 30 condlepower
electric lamps where few years back
they would have been content with
eight. The reason appears to be that
the pail over our towns is increasing
In general intensity, though actual
fogs are fewer. Hence more and more
lights are being fitted in dark cor.
nerS.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Safeuuarded.

DO you expect to get on well with
your foreign son.in-law?"
Surely answered Mr.. Cumrox.
Neither Of US can pronounce tho
others lame veil enough to get On
quarreling terms Of iEtimacy."-Waah.
ington Star.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Bulldog, Still Dead

the original, only he calls this one
Pete the Bulldog II.
| The original Pete was white, and
died under stress of circumstances in
Apri! of last year. Some one hit him
with brick in the White House lot.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
Limit TO Achievement.

6tNtJI 20 NCuJeVeSUeuIe
Beyond their power tho bravest can.
not fight.-Homer.
Willmar tribune. [volume] (Willmar, Minn.) 1895-1931, 1908-04-08
SYNOPSIS.

Burton II. Barnes, a wealthy American
touring Corsica, rescues the young Eng
lsh lieutenant, Edward Gerard Anstruth-
or, and his Corsican bride, Marina.
daughter of the Paolis, from the muir
derous vendetta. understanding that his
reward Is to be the hand of the girl he
loves, Enid Anstruther, sister Of the Eng
lish lieutenant. The four fly from Ajac-
clio to Marseilles on board the French
steamer Constantine. The vendetta pur-
sues and as the quartet are about to
board the train for London at Marseilles,
Marina Is handed a mysterious note
winch causes her to collapse and necessi-
rates postponement Of the Journey.
Barnes gets part of the mysterious note
and receives letters which inform him
that he is marked by tho vendetta. He
employs an American detective and plans
10 beat the vendetta at their own game.
f. for the purpose Of securing the safety
OF the women Barnes arranges to have
Lady Chartris lease a secluded villa at
Nice to which the party is to be taken
IN a yacht Suspicion IL created that
Marina is in league with the Corsicans.
A man. believed to be Corregio Danella,
IS seen passing the house and Marina is
thought to have given him sign. Ma
rina refuses to explain to Barnes which
fast adds to his latent suspicious. Barnes
plans for the safety Of the party are
ASoiAiSA w IHc NOTSlCdHS. LIE carriage
CARRYING their party to the local landing
IS followed by two men. One Of the
horsemen is supposed to be Corregio.
They try to murder the American. The
cook on the yacht-a Frenchman-is sus-
spected of completely in the plot. The
Tparty anchors at st. Tropez. The yacht
rs followed by small boat. The cook Is
detected giving signals to the boat.
Barnes attempts to throw him overheard,
but is prevented by Marina and Enid.
The cook is found to be innocent of the
to Lady Chartris. Barnes and Enid
make arrangements for their marriage.
The net tightens about Barnes. He re-
celVes note from La Belle Blackwood,
the American adventures. Barnes hears
that Elijah Emory, his detective, has
been murdered by the Corsicans. He
learns that the man supposed to be Cor
regio, who followed the party on their
q way to the boat, was Saliceti, a nephew
Of the count: and. that Count Corregio
had been in Nice for some time prior to
the party's arrival. The count warns
Barnes not to marry Enid unless he
would have her also involved in the MUIR
,derous .feud. Barnes and Enid are mar
Fied. Soon after their wedding Barnes
bride disappears. Barnes discovers she
has been kidnapped and taken to Corsica.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
.
aA NOTICE OF LETTERS

Notice is hereby given that letters Of adj
mlnistration upon the estate Of James II.
Wheeler, late Of Iron county, deceased, have
been granted to the undersigned, William
Hampton, by the Judge Of the Probate Court
OF the County Of Iron, bearing date the 9TH
cay OF December, 1907. All persons having
claims against said estate are required to
exhibit them TO me for allowance, within one
year after the date Of said Letters, or they
may be precluded from any benefits Of such
estate; and if such claims be not exhibited
within two years from the time o. the Dub
location Of this notice, they will be forever
barred.
December 10, 1907.
WILLIAM HAMPTON,
Administrator.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
Saloon in New Washington Station?

The application for a saloon Ii
cense in the new Union Station at
Washington, is meeting with gen.
eral indignation and opposition.
This magnificent structure is one
of the most expensive, and, when
finished, will be one of the most
complete stations in the world. A
hearing was accorded the friends
and opponents of the question by
the Excise Board of the District of
Columbia. Pastors of Washing
toms most prominent churches, re-
ligious workers, members of the
Anti Saloon League, w. G. T. U.
and other organizations were pres
ent to enter their earnest protest
against granting license for the
sale of liquor in this, the gateway
to the nations capital city.
1t had all been done so quietly,
comparatively few were aware of
the danger confronting us. What
a temptation a saloon in this beau
tiful building would offer to the
thousands of persons who patro-
nize the station, many of whom
spend hours in waiting, some with
anxiety and excitement, and 9TH
ers distressed and disappointed.
Surely a prohibitory law is needed
to keep this foe out of our beauti-
full public buildings in the District
of Columbia. The Excise Board
announced the postponement of a
decision until it had taken the va
rious arguments under considera-
tion.-Home Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23

One of the mightiest arguments
used in behalf of the DEVILS
smoothest doctrine-that of COM
promise-is, that bad prevents
worse. Sunday games and thea
tres, they say, keep people from
worse places; a jug at home and a
game of cards keep the boys from
the saloon and a gambling room.
OF course, it is not So. Bad never
prevents worse, always breeds it.
A poker game in the homo with a
penny ante will keep the boys
from wanting to shoot craps in
the back alley, just as much as
a bite of red apple will keep a boy
from wanting any more.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
A New Version.

After hard study Hilary felt sure
that he had the parable Of the prodi.
gal son by heart. All went well in
the recitation until he came to the
prodigals return, which he described
in this way: But when he was yet a
great way off his father saw him and
had compassion, and ran and fell on
his neck and broke it," But, my son."
explained the mother, "he fell on his
sons neck and kissed him." "Ohi /
thought he ran and fell on his own
neck, and because he was an old man
he must have broken it!"-Harper's
Magazine.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
Y. T. U. Column.

~ Through the courtesy Of the
Z7f4sZ REGISTER this spaceis grant,
IN tSs9 ed the w. {. 7. U. lii ed
WEfAhH tied by MARTHA I. FRANCIS,
&s&EHA Local Press Superintendent,
Elk as appointed by the State Or
ganizer, Mrs. L. S. LaMance.
W. c. T. U. WATCItWORDS:
ORGANIZE! EDUCATE! AGIrATE!
w. c. T. U PRINCIPLES.
Total Abstinence; Prohibition Of the Liquor
Traffic; One Standard Of Morals for Men
and Women; Home Protection; Equal
Suffrage; and the Teaching of Scientific
Temperance in Public Schools.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
They Speak Very Highly of Cham
berlaln's Cough Remedy In
saskatchewan.

In q recent letter Mr.. j. Fl. Ellis.
Of Ellisboro, Sask., says: "Many
have spoken very highly OF Cham
%6erlain's Cough Remedy. Mr..
Geo. Page, Of this place, bought a
bottle OF it for himself and fonnd
1t did him good. He also found it
most useful when one of his child
rem took the cronp, He had no.
ticed that 1t was recommended for
that disease, but was surprised
and pleased with the quick relief
which 1t afforded, and especially
50 as it saved him a ten mile drive
for the doctor. For sale by the
Arcadia Valley Drug Co.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-01-23
W. c. 7. U PRINCIPLES.
Denatured Saloons.


On January list the saloons at
Highwood, ILL.,, ceased to sell in
toxicants, in accordance with the
new state law prohibiting the sale
of liquor within one and one
eighth miles of any military or
naval reservation in Illinois. The
saloonkeepers do not go out of
business, however, having re-
placed their stock of liquors with
ice cream and "soft drinks" They
believe, says the Chicago Post,
that the soldiers from Fort Sheri-
dan will spend their money for
these refreshments near at hand
rather than go farther to secure Ii
quor. This is exactly hat oppo-
nents of the beer canteen have
been saying all the time, but sa-
loon men used to think that SOL
dlefS were determined to have IL
quor, and that if it were not pro-
vided for them in the c~anteen,
they would go any distance neces-
sary to secure it. 1t is astonishing
how great a change of opinion can
be accomplished by a little legal
suasion.
Now, if the proper authorities
will see to it that no liquor is sold
in these ''soft drink" places, we
shall have at Fort Sheridan an ex-
ample of a post free from both the
beer canteen within and the Glow
dive" without.-Home Herald.