davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

was haggard and his eyes roamed rest
lessly from the little green gate mark
ed "Elysian Fields to h little red
gate marked "Hades."
Excuse me-" aid Rhadamanthus.
This is an important case" and he
turned to the Shade and frowned at
him over his glasses.
Let me see.'' he continued. turning
the leaves of his big book. You are
"Brown-Socrates?" put in the Shade
%nervously.
"Ah. yes" ~returned his honor. You
have quite an accoun to settle. Tut,
tut. There are black marks all the
have paid the full penalty
Shade, whining and raising his hands
pitilully. II paid it on earth!"
"What?" Rhadamanthus gave him a
II was married." pleaded the Shade.
for Ia years.
ooh. that's different" said Rhada-
m MAN. ha sympathetically- u see. Your
"Nantippe Brown interrupted the
Shade eagerly.
Judge Rhadamanthus rose. put out
his hand and shook that of the Shade
feelinSly.
&c right in. old chap" he said,
heartily. Your wife's in there and
But with one long wall of fright and
horror the Shade jumped up, backed
toward the little red gate and disap-
peared down the %elevat shaft.
You see how it is" said Rhadaman-
thus. Struggling his shoulders. There
is no marrying in heaven, because the
nays seem to have it; the nays have
it-and it is a voter Come again some
time when you can stay longer-but
don't wear that hat" he added hastily
shaking my hand.
why not?" 1 inquired in an injured
tone.
1T would never get through the
Celestial gates,' said Rhadamanthus.
Then l don't want to come" 1 re-
turned hnughtily giving the brim of
my Merry Widow an extra tilt as i
| passed ont
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

But" I objected. slightly Modified.
those are all such little things"
My dear" said Rhadamanthus, lean
ing over c~onfidentially. Its the little
things that make marriage a or
-er-the opposite. Any two people
could get along fairly comfortably if
they had nothing Eut each others NOR
ais to put up with. Happiness doesn't
depend half SO much on whether a hus-
band keeps the Ten Commandments
and goes to church regularly as ON
whether he keeps a pretty st%enographer
and comes home to linn regularly;
nor on whether a wife holds lofty ideals
and how she does her duty, as on
whether she can hold a ervan and
how she does her hair for breakfast.
A thief or a murderer can make his
wife fairly happy if he will be on time
for his meals and can come nome with
out a crouch and get up in the morning
without a growl and put up the por-
there's with a pleasant smile. A Jeze-
bal can make her husband think him
self a lucky man if she will forebear
hanging his trouser upside down on a
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
TO the InvincibIe Republic.

America! | have never breathed thy air.
Have never touched thy soil or heard the
speed
And thunder of thy cities; Yet would 1
Salute thee from affair, not chiefly awed
BY wide domain, mere breadth of gov
erned dust.
Nor measuring thy greatness and thy
power
Only by nulnbers: rather. seeing thee
AS mountainous hcaNe of spirit, emotion
huge.
Enormous hate and anger, boundless
And most unknown unfathomable depth
OF energy divine.
In peace today
Thou sit'st between thy oceans; but when
Was at thy making, and endowed thy
With many gifts and costly, she forgot
70 mix with these IL genius for repose:
Wherefore d sting is ever in thy blood,
And in thy marrow q sublime unrest.
And thus thou keepst hot the forge of
Where man is still r%e-shapen and re-
With fire and c%langour.
And as thou art vast,
So are the perils vast, that evermore
In thy own house are bred; nor least of
That fair and fell Delilah. Luxury,
That shears the hero's strength away.
Palsy on nations. Flee her loneliness,
For in the end her kisses are a sword.
Strong sons hast thou begotten, natures
In scorn OF riches. greatly simple minds;
No land in al the world hath memories
That If the peerless and the stainless
one,
The man of Yorktown and of Valley
Or he of tragic doom. thy later born.
He Of the short plain word that thrilled
And freed the bondman-let it not be said
That If today these radiant ones returned.
They would behold thee changed beyond
From that austerity wherein thy youth
Was nurtured. those large habitudes of
But who are we, to counsel thee or warn,
In his old England. whence thy fathers
Here, too; hath Mammon many thrones.
Are palaces of sloth and towers OF pride,
The untaintcd wealth of English fields.
The passion and sweet trouble of the
Is in the air: and the remembrance comes
And leaf. but for man also, there are
times
OF mighty vcrnal movement, seasons
Life casts away the body .: this death,
And a greet surge OF youth breaks on
Then are the primal fountains clamor-
ously
Unsealed: and then, perchance, are dread
things born,
Not unforetold by deep parturient pangs,
But the light minds that heed no au-
guries,
untausht by all tina heretofore hath
been,
Taking their ease on the bllnd verge of
fate,
See nothing, and hear nothing, till the
hour
6f tho VIZ of advent $hnf rnn1no oil tG3rro
new.
William Watson IN the Spectator.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
An Ancient Sion.
From the New york Tr,bun

From the New York Tribune.
This is the announcement on IN an
Gent sign, said still to be hanging at
Falmouth, England:
Roger Giles. Surgin, Parish Clark &
Skulemaster. Groser G. Hundertaker
Respectfully informs ladys and gentle
man that he drors teef without watching
a mint, applies laches every hour, blis-
penny a peace. He sells Godfather's
kordales, kuts korns, bunyons. doctors
osses. clips donl1ies vance a munt and
undertakes to luke arter every bodies
nayles by the ear. Joesharps, penny
wissels. brass kanelsticks, fryin pans
and other moozikal hinstrumints a
grately r~eydooced tigers. Young ladys
gentlemen larns their grammar
and l~angeudge in the purtiest mannar,
also crate care taken off their morrels
and spelltn. Also Zarm-zinging, tachy-
ing the brass vial. and oil other zorts
of fancy work, Squalls, pokers. weaz-
zels. and all country dances tort at
home and abroad at perfekshun. Per-
As times is cruel bad, I begs to tell ee
that has just beginned to sell all sorts
of stashOnary ware, cox, hens, vouls,
pigs and all other lind Of poultry,
blackin- brishes, herrins. coles, scrub
bin-brishes. tarykel and cooley bukee
ker-seeds, morrel pokkerankerchers and
all Zorts OF swate-matts, including ta-
tiers. sassages and other garden stuff,
bakky, zizars, lamp oyle, tay kettles
and other intoxzigatin likkers, a dale of
fruit. hats. zongs, hare oyle, pattins.
bukkits. grindin stones anda bother
aitables. corn and bunyon salve and all
hardware. I as laid in a large azzort-
ment OF trype. dog mate. lollipops. gin
ger beer, matches an dother pickles,
such as hapsom salts. hoysters, winz-
ger sope. anzetrar.-Old rags bort and
zold here and nowhere else, newlayde
heggs by me Roger Giles, ringing
burdes keepd, SIGH Is howls. donkies,
paydox, Holsters, crickets. also a stock
OF celebrated brayder.
Up. S.-1 tayches geography. rithme-
tic. cowsttcks. jimnastics and other
chynees tricks"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
Put Up the Sword.

l have sung of the soldiers glory
As | never shall sing again:
] have gazed on the SHAMELESS CORY.
! have Snlelled OF the slaughter-pcn.
There is blood in the ink-well clotted,
There are stains on the laurel leaf,
And the pages of fame are blotteI
With the tears of a needless grief.
The bird is slaughtered for fashion,
And the beast is killed for sport;
And never the word compassion
Is whispered at Moloch's court.
For this parent zeal in the water
Is slain. and her child must die.
That some sister or wife or daughter
Her beauty may beautify.
And the merciful thought we smother
For such is the way of man
For the unborn a~Strakhan."
But a season of rest comes never
For the rarest sport of all;
viii His patience endure forever,
Who noteth the sparrow's fall?
When the voileys OF hell are sweeping
The seq and the battle plain,
Do you think our God is sleeping
And never to wake again?
When hunger and ravenous fever
Are Staying the wasted frame,
Shall we worship the red decciver.
The devil that men call Fame?
We may swing the censor to cover
The odor OF hlood-in vain:
God asks us, over and over.
Where Is thy brother, Cain?'
James Jeffrey Roche, IN the Century.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
he WAS NOT a JoLLIER.
But His Line Of zine Talk Proved
Very Gratifying to the
YounQ LADY,,

Young Lady.
The Average Sort of Girl said to the
Commonplace Young Man: II met that
very interesting MIR. Yallery about three
weeks ago. and we-mamma and I--have
seen a good deal of him since then"
You are trying to make me frantically
Jealous" said the Commonplace Young
Man, relates the Chicago Daily News.
TN not going to be. though"
The idea!" said the girl. I'D like to
know what RICH you have to be jealous"
II said I wasn't going to be. What
makes him interesting"
II says such nice things"
"Taffey. chg"
you are horrid."
II know am. 1 always recognized my
own little defects and limitations. Per
haps ] could Improve If l had the benefit
of a good example. Tell me what nice
things he says"
Well. in the cause OF education per
haps l might be excused If 1 did. He
said the gown i wore that night was a
poem.'
What sort OF a poem-dialect, humor-
Gus. short or long? 1t seems to me that
was a little indefinite"
"That's your material point OF view.
He meant, of course. that 1t had "a beauti-
full harmony, and that it appealed to the
poetic and artistic nature"
ooh, IL he meant that, 1T was all right
I'd never have thought of 1t, though"
"Of course you wouldn't"
mo. I don't think l would have noticed
your dress even-not while 1 had some
thing p~rett!er to look at"
You are complimentary, I must saw"
your face, for instance"
We'll. that isn't so bad, perhaps"
1T don't see anything to make a fuss
about because you wore something mai
you set of to advantage. You do thai
with anything you wear. Now, take that
waist you are distinguishing. It's Just a
shirt waist, isn't it?"
IT think it's rather a nice one"
IT think SO, too. but I'm not a fudge.
I wouldn't call +. a poem, for Instance.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

I'd call it a shirt waist. if j, was on any
other girl but you, 1 wouldn't give IL 4
second look. What else did he say""
He said / was az fair as a flower
There 1t is again! No specifications ~:
all. What sort of a fiower-a holiyhock.
n tuberose, or what? For all you know.
he might have been trying to insin,xata
that you We're Il rhododendron. ! wouldD:t
stand for .ha: If ] were a girl"
~ 1hink it was nice"
az don't. L think you've got tho flower
garden faded. I'm no hor,icultrrist. but
as far as my taste goes, I'd quit a bower
of roses any time you crooked Il finger at
me. Now, it seems to me so far that yOlAr
interesting friend hasn't made good"
Don't you think he has?'
II do not. Comparing you with map:,-
zine poetry and climbing nastnrtium..
Honest, L wouldn't compare You with ony-
thing tina l ever saw"
"No?'
Sure .o.. When l take n good. SQUARE
look at you. you don't put me in mind Of
things. l wouldn't say Sonr.eyes were ~
dark as a stack of black cats or that yo.r
lips were a coral reef or your form ma
the grace of a gazelle. My mind is..f
running on natural history or utcrafl,r.
or botany. Your eyes are in a class Nv
thcmselves-same way with your lips ~
your nose and that dimple you're shown.
now. No. I throw up my hands. Yov.H
never make a good jollter of me-"
Oh. I don't know said the ~irs
you're doing very well now. ! tbinh-
better than l expected. Go on"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
II want to interview ST. Peter" L
remarked to the editor the other morn

II want to interview st. Peter" l
remarked to the editor the other morn
ing.
That parsonage looked up from his
stub pen n glue pot and took me in
with a slow, scornful smile from the
top OF my 32-inch a to the hem of
my pique skirt.
NONSENSE" he laughed mockingly.
You never could get in"
II don't van to get in-yet." I re-
turned boldly. u want to find out
"What?'
Why there is no marrying IN
heaven"
Tho editor, who Il Wife himself,
put down his glue pot wearily.
The answer" he said With bitter
rony, lis very easy. Most anybody
of course" I interrupted hastily.
But You know how this paper de-
mands information from headquarters
and authoritative statements and -
All right" broke in the editor des-
perately. Go ahead. But don't try st.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
Nonsense Verses.

Miss Ma.el.a had a cat,
The cat she had a feHer
Their backyard concerts so annoyed.
Ma made Marcella sell her.
Miss Lena weighed an awful lot
Pudgy! you should have seen her
But her new GOWN. striped up and .iovn.
seemed to make Lena leaner.
Louis a pair Of bottles bought.
Though they were number threes,
They pinched, and so he changed them e..
A pair that gave Loo ease.
Miss RoXana wed q mar :
Whose cognomen was Hanna.
Their babe was named for grandma. -
Roxanna now rocks Anna.
Hepzibah is a mannish girl.
kitty's more like her ma,
With bonny Kate I'm deep In love,
But rs. for BepzI-hah! :,
C. II. w. in Boston Transcripl l
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
s%44H zE 9. 1agEs&ag4r Geu7zG AI.2a4.RS %

New York. Special: Aboard the
Provence, of the French line, which
steamed for Havre, was j. Pierpont
Morgan, who a engaged TWO suites
in the captains apartments, where he
has gone for privacy during the voy-
remarked tina it felt bully to be a
DOCTOR" referring to his degree from
Yale.
II will not speak of Mr.. Cleveland
now he said: the death of the great
man has given me a great shock, and
it is too serious a thinS to speak OF
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
All in the Point Of View.

TTUHH l|UHuOn TTt-BftS.
The rigid observation OF English
rules in South Carolina courts, and a
neglect of the same on the part of Mr..
Petigru. a barrister well known in his
day, gave rise to the following pas
sage:
Mr.. Petigru," said the Judge, you
have on a light coat. You can't speak,"
May it please the BENCH" said the
barrister, Il conform strictly to the
law. Let me illustrate. The law says
h barrister shall wear a black gown
and coat, n your honor thinks that
means a black coat?'
Yes" said the judge.
We'll, the law says the sheriff shall
wear a cooked hat and sword. Does
your honor hold that the sword must
be cooked as we'll as the hat?"
He was permitted to proceed
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
Who Did?

From EVerybody's Magazine.
One of our subscribers writes us th.f
William Balfour Ker's picture ..Tss
First Spank" reminds him Of the ~.
lowing story: A little fellow who ~
just felt the ard side of the siipner'
when the tears had dried somewhat.
turned to his mother Mother" ~
asked, did grandfather spank fafher
when he was a little boy?"
Yes" answered his mother impress
sively.
And did his father whip him whe.
YES" !.
and did his father spank him2.
A pause.
Well. who started this thing. any
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

hurriedly. ] want time to- think it over
before ! give expression of my opin-
ion on anything regarding him or his
life"
Mr.. Morgan was asked what his
views We're regarding the financial
situation.
Well" he replied, II don't want IL
talk too much about that either, but
you may say that ] am optimistic
yes. optimistic in strong
that's all. The bottom has not yet
fallen out. There are going to be bet
ter t1mes-call 1t optim1sm-that'n
good enough"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
At the Boarding 10

Adolphus (taking the last sliceN-
This is very good bread, Mrs. ThoH.-
son.
Mrs. Thompson (the landlady)-Yex
I think it's better bread than some -
my bOarders.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24
Good Advice-

Applicant-What is the first th,r~ -
do before you get a marriage license1
License Clerk-Think it over, younx
man; think it over.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

Peter. Get Judge Rhadamanthus on
the phone"
He was the original gatekeeper to
the Ely's and Field's,'' explained the
Editor, land what he doesn't know
about people isn't worth printing. Be
sides. he's always willing to talk for
publication. Now be off With YOU
and he returned once more to his
task of making N stick of joke fill
two sticks OF space.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

i" declare" exclaimed Rhadaman-
thus. glancing n%ervously up at me over
his %spectacles as l slipped past the
doorkeeper and nudged his elbow.
There's no keeping you women out
of this court room. Your curiosity is
S0ianf hing nnlnccnl-
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

America. I have never breathed thy air.
Have never touched thy soil or heard the
speed
And thunder of thy cities; Yet would 1
salute thee from affair, not chiefly awed
By wide domain, mere breadth of gov
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

! have sung of the soldiers glory
AS | never shall sing again:
] have gazed on the sha1nbles CORY.
! have Smelled of the slaughter-pcn
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-07-24

Only by numbers: rather. seeing thee
AS mountainous hcaNe of spirit. emotion
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1908-10-08
COMMERCIAL CLUB
COMMITTEES READY
Captain Norton, of Gary Or
ganization, Makes His
Appointments.
RIGHT men FOR THE PLACES
Regular Meeting Which Was to Have
Been Held Yesterday Is
Dispensed With.

The standing committee of the Com
mercial club which were appointed by
Pr esident H. s. Norton were announced
yesterday afternoon in the club rooms
OF the Gary hotel, where meeting of
the organization was to have been
held There was to have been a spe-
cial session of the club but owing
to the fact that notices had not been
sent out to the members. there was a
large enough attendance to warrant
any procedure.
The committees which were appoint
ed consisted most of the leaders OF
the club whose activity in the past
warrent their tenure of the important
places on these various committees OF
the organization. as matters which
come under their jurisdiction are OF
the utmost Importance.
The committees which were appoint
ed by Captain Norton are as follows
Entertainment-C. H. Maloney, chair.
man; DR.. T. B. Templin. Theodore Bin
zen. H. G. Hay jr.. Marc N. Goodnow.
City ordinances W r Hodges
chairman: John Bennett. F. L. welsch.
elmer. Major John McFadden. A. R
Hoover.
Public Experimentation A. Bren.
men. chairman; J. T. Vordemark. HARRY
Call. s. E. Hess. P. L. Fitzgerald
Location of industries-M. A. Cald
Ingwald Moe. and G. S. widholm.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1908-10-08
HOTEL AND BUFFET
MAN FOR WATSON
Theodore Binzen, One of
Gary's Leading Citizens
Isn't Deceived.
SAYS THEY CAN'T SCARE HIM
Other Gary Business Men Climb into
the Watson Bandwagon
These Days.

Theodore Binzen, who is a German
and who conducts one of the most
popular saloons in Gary, whose place
of business is known all over the city
and who is the pioneer restauranter
and saloonkeeper in Gary. is out for
Taft, Watson and the whole republic
an ticket.
Mr.. Binzen says that all of this talk
about Watson is bosh. concocted by
the democrats to scare a lot of sa-
loonkeepers into voting for Thomas
Marshall
Mr.. Binzen is one of the rapidly In
creasing number of saloonkeepers who
believes that Watson will give Lake
county a square deal. He laughs at
the idea of Lake county going dry
when it would be necessary to secure
1000 signers to a petition before the
matter can even be put to vote.
He is Of the opinion that If there
had been county local option instead
of township local option. Gary would
never have gone dry and he does not
believe that it will ever go dry again.
of Mr.. Watson himself and says that
lie Will make the greatest governor
that Indiana ever had His saloon.
where hundreds of workingmen stop on
their way from work. is plastered with
pictures of Taft. Watson and many
kcounty candidates.
II is understood that there are many
other Gary saloonkeepers who are go
ing to vote for Watson and others who
had thought of voting for Marshall
have deceived them and that Watson
| will be just as friendly to them as
Marshall.
Others of them say that the republic
an ticket is sure to be elected anyway,
and it is a whole lot better for them TO
climb on the bandwagon and be
right than it is to oppose the repub-
| lican candidate and then have him
hostile TO them through his whole ad-
ministration.
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1908-10-08
DEMOCRATS L|VEN UP
Hammond Speakers Will
Address the Faithful
at Gary.

The democratic club of Gary will
gather its shattered forces together
tonight and hold meeting at the cor
ne rof Twelfth and Washington streets.
The signal of distress was sent to Ham
mond and it was decided to sent Jo-
seph Conroy and Judge w. W. McMa-
hon to the disaffected district and see
if there is any hope of resusitating the
democracy of Gary
Arrangements will be made for the
meeting, which will be held in Gary
on October 20. when Thomas Marshall
will speak. An effort will be made to
get out crowd and make the meetings
a success.
Thomas Marshall is the last resort
of the Lake county democracy and if
his meeting should fall it will be the
last straw. 1t is expected that Mr..
Marshalrs meetings will be well at
tended by both democrats and republi-
cans who will go to hear him out OF
curiosity.
The effort OF the committee of demo
Gratis who were appointed TO try to
start something in Gary. seems TO have
been abortive. and as yet there is far
from being the wild enthusiasm that
has been manifested by the republicans
The Lake County times. [volume] (Hammond, Ind.) 1906-1933, 1908-10-08
WOMEN IN CA MPAI On
National Organizer of Lin
coin League Will Be
in Gary.

Mrs. r. r. CULLEN of Gary. who was
made state organizer of the ladies'
auxiliary of the Lincoln league, writes
to f.. Richard Schaaf, county chairman
of Lake county. in which she states
that Mrs. J. E. Foster. the national or
ganizer of the Lincoln league. will be
in Gary on October and will speak to
the republican women of Gary and
their husbands.
Mrs CULLEN urges the republicans
of other cities of the county to come
to Gary and bring their wives and help
to make the meeting a success. She
says that Gary is the only place in the
county and possibly the only place in
the district where Mrs. Foster will
speak, and for that reason she urges a
large attendance on this occasion.
Arrangeme have been made fol-
the distribution of Kills in Hammond
Whiting, East Chicago and indiana
Harbor. Mrs. CULLEN is the originator
CT the idea of forming a republican
club of women and for that reason wa.
given the work of state organizer