davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago News

IFrOm the Chicago News.
A wise son overlooks a lot of his
dads talk.
Some men employ odd methods in
trying to get even.
1t doesn't pay to spend money Just
to show you have It.
takes good man to do right.
Happiness consists of being less un-
happy than your neighbor.
Occasionally an honest man tires of
the game and takes up politics.
Every time a girl builds an air castle
she puts a different man in 1t.
It's awfully hard to convince our
selves that people who prasie us are
liars.
Before getting the best of it the
average man gets the worst Of 1t sew
eral times.
One of the things every husband
should know is the way home imme-
diately after office hours.
1t is necessary to place some men
behind the bars in order to induce
them to live the simple life.
Once in a great while a married
woman admits that she doesn't wish
she had remained single.
The average woman isn't satisfied
with giving her husband q small piece
Of her mind; she hands 1t to him in
chunks.
If Methuselah had been as wise as
some modern f1nanciers he would have
owned the earth long before he was
gathered to his fathers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
GLOBE SIGHTS.
[From the Atchison Globe

From the Atchison Globe.1
Everyone can stand little more
than he thinks he can.
you have a trouble" old women
always say to young girls. why, how
can that be? You are not married"
What has become of the old fash
toned farmer who often. said to his
neighbors: 81 know a Teller who has
a match for your horse!"
We don't suppose there is one per-
son in fifty who can tell the differ
ence, or if there is any. between emf
grafton and immigration.
Every man thinks that if he didn't
have to stay in his home town and
look after his family, he could go to
some new country" and make a for
tune in the course of a year.
Though men and women are sup
posed to think great deal Of each
other. anything you say against the
women will make the men laugh, and
anything proven against the men
makes the women applaud
We have noticed that when anyone
in a crowd has little scandal to re-
late. it is not until the speaker is
through talking. and all have had their
curiosity appeased. that some one
says something about gossiping being
An Atchison woman is writing a
book of dreams, and every night she
dreams new chapter. She claims
that she is inspired, and the neighborS
who have seen what poor house.
keeper she is. and have noticed how
long the dishes remain unwashed, and
the beds unmade, while she is gazing
into the sky, think that something like
that must be the matter with her.
You think you have a quick head on
your shoulders. What would be your
first move If your baby should choke
until it got black in the face? If a
man should be stricken in a fit. would
you leave him to die, while you ran
for a doctor? Could you restore a
man who is apparently dead from
drowning? If child should catch on
fire, would you remember that life
depends on what you do at once? Is
there anyone quick-headed enouph to
do anything in an emergency, except
scream for help7
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
HUHOR or THE Day

Professors wife-You haven't kissed me
w55 S i ssss sssa sss
May e: SIX . ,s i ,eps y, ID:s oa
my occupation1- replied the newcomer.
''Oh, I'm q sculptor"
you carve marble. do youf''
An, fore.ss ycu YIN Be z valuable .. ;, a.
come up to this end and carve this fowlf'
London Tit-Bits.
spokesman Of the delegation. ''the church
is Obliged to ask you to consent to a cut
VERY veil responded the :1D u pan
OF Ledger
scott-Your friend Weed smokes 10 much
he must buy his cigars by the hundred
Mott-well, he buys 'em by the hundred s,. Cd
money.
LonglRichleigh says he could believe in
no religion that didn't enlarge and broad
strong-ouite so! But fancy the ideal
religion in Richleigh's view is one that
GENTLY to admit the camel.
DR.. Grinfin-I must say the world 10
very ungrateful towards our profession.
How seldom one sees q public memorial
erected to q doctor.
Mrs Golightly-How seldom! Oh. doctor,
think Of our cemeteries.-Stray Stories.
Little Willie Cooking in an algebra
What does "x mean, pa?
Pa-It represents an unknown quantity.
my son, like an ex-congressman, for in
stance.--Chicago News.
Ethel-But, papa, I don't see why you
should object to Perry Pink. He IL such
a retiring young man.
Papa-H'm! when does he RETREAT
sunrise ?-Illustrated Btta.
John, do you love mer'
Yes
How muchr'
"Say fifty dollars worth, Martha. Mon
ey is tight just now."-Courier Journal
Now said Mrs. Dresser, don't you
think my new hat Is a perfect dream?"
'Well. no." replied her husband. ITO be
| should also be merely a dream. "-Phila-
delphia Press.
Pretty dull and monotonous out this
| way, isn't it?" remarked the tourist.
Not always" replied the quiet native.
by Heck! this countryn be stirred up
purity constable in few weeks"
You don't say? Riots?'
mo. spring owin's"-Phf1adelphi
Press.
He lived in faith. didn't her
Yes. by hope. but on charity."-Balti-
more American.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Of labor colonies where persons may be
taught IL. an intelligent way to lead
better and useful lives. It favors keep
ing prisoners until their reform is rea-
|sonabIy assured. but it is insistent that
where no effort at reform is made. the
whole influence of jails is debasing. In
many jails Influences for good are
meagre. If not wholly lacking Twenty
six jails do not provide any reading
matter for prisoners. In lightweight
no religious services Of any kind are
ever held.
Undoubtedly American prisons need
investigation ard reform.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.
[From the Philadel,

[From the Philadelphia Press.J
1t is no trouble for some people to
look for 1t.
| Even the fellow who has no end in
view can see his finish.
1t isn't what a man wants, but what
he has. that makes him contented.
When fellow tells a girl he will love
her always she is sometimes young
enough to believe It.
Nell-"When I first met Olive didn't
like her at ALL" Relle-"WeIl, you
know, olives are an acquired taste"
Its easy enough to make money"
remarked the successful man. Yes,
the trouble is to pass it without getting
caught" replied the counterfeiter.
The Cynical Bachelor rises to remark
that married life is frequently ono
grand. sweet song. but with the hus-
band playing the accompaniment.
Tommy-"Pop, what is necessary to
be known as a philosopher" Tommy's
Pop-"All that Is necessary, my son. 10
to preach what you don't practice"
wigg-'so you admit that there was
wanted the earth" Wagg-"Yes: when
was seasick. a thousand miles from
land"
Biobhs-Tverybody knows he mar
ried her for money. I suppose she Is
constantly throwing 1t up to him.
slobbs-"Only In the shape Of carfare
and lunches"
II shall be glad when am old
enough to do as I please" said the bog.
And about that time you win go or
and get married, SO 1t won't do you
much good, after ALL" replied the man.
Wigwag-"Your wife has a wonder
full mind. It seems inexhaustible.
Henpeckke-"That's right. She has
given me a piece Of It every day since
we were married and seems to have
some left"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Not much perspicacity was needed
to foretell that the senate would never
agree to the proposition made by the
house of representatives for the CEN
'tralization of all the pension agencies
throughout the country in one large
bureau at Washington. There was no
need for such legislation and the ac-
ton of the senate committee on pen
.sions in frowning on the plan was the
proper one to take. And that this ac-
ton has been taken is especially good
news to Topeka where the largest
pension agency in the country is To-
Gated.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
ON THE RIGHT ROAD.

President Roosevelt's veto the other
day, of water power grant was nc
surprise. as 1t was in pursuance Of a
policy he had previously announced.
The message accompanying the veto,
however. more fully elaborated the
chief executives views on the subject.
His refusal to permit congress to make
permanent grants of valuable fran
chises, without compensation or re-
strictions. is simply a part of his COM
prehensive belief in the conservation
of the natural resource of the country
for the benefit of the whole people.
1t is correct policy. too. 1t is not
to be expected that it will meet the
unqualified approval Of predatory wealth
regard public property as legitimate
spoil. 1t need not be denied that utili-
cation of such resources by private in
terests has developed much wealth in
the nation and benefited many persons.
But we have entered upon a new era
in development. Cities demand COM
pensation for franchises in their
streets: other civil divisions have
ceased to aid the construction of rail-
roads by issues of public bonds. 1t Is
proper that the government shall con-
serve what remains of the public do
main and exact terms that will more
largely benefit the people. If valuable
rights are disposed Of they should pay
a rental that will aid in the improve
ment Of the public highways Of COM
merce, or the reclamation of waste
areas. MT. Roosevelt has boldly taken
the right road in this matter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

One of the worlds greatest compos-
ers Is chloroform.
= 4 y
Call man 1evel-headed and he's
pleased; but call him a flat-head and
he wants to fight.
\ \
Gas meters are like the works of
some authors. They are easy to read
but hard to understand.
4 n X
A snail may not be blessed with
gifts such as man has, but 1t Is wise
enough to keep within its shell.
X n X
When person impressively leaves
the impression that he is greatly
impressed he may be properly called
tactful.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Ohio has ever been noted for pro-
ducing all kinds of peculiar specimens
of humanity as well as more than her
share of great men, so there is really
no cause for wonder over the rather
extraordinary actions of an individual
In her midst which have Just come to
light. He was mayor of Enon, a small
city near Springfield, until few weeks
ago when he resigned. 1t seems that
for years past he has been a worship
per of wooden woman idol as ar
emblem Of purity. The extent of the
satisfaction he received from this sort
of worship is not narrated. but it GER
tainly must have been of the peaceful
order.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Nobody is much surprised over the
information which has been furnished
Fred S. Jackson, the states attorney
general, that the lumber companies in
Kansas are working under an ironclad
combine. Lumber prices could never
have been maintained at their exorbit-
ant figure if this had not been so. Mr..
jackson will probably use every effort
to cut the tentacles of this octopus and
the people will be ready to help him
in all ways.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

den cities, wherein no man nor maid
shall break the eight hour law, is the
object of a bill which has been intro
duced recently in the house Of repre-
sentatives by Bourke Cochran Of New
York. 1t is almost needless to state
that Mr.. Cochran introduced the bill
by request" Unfortunately If this
road is built it will run south of Kan
sas. Still We will use our influence to
have 1t diverted this way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

The expected has happened. An
nouncement is made by a representa-
tive of the local gas company that
any action taken by the city council
in the way of reducing the gas rates
as they were fixed in the original
franchise granted to the company
will be fought in the courts. 1t was
hardly expected that the gas COM
pany would sit calmly by and permit
its rates to be cut without taking
some vigorous action.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
rFrom the New York Pres

GFrom the New York Press.1
A politician can be honest before he
begins.
A sure way to get into q dispute In to
have a wife.
A mans financial experience n worth
something to the fellow that gives It
to him.
When . man can't think Of anything
else to do to be disaSreoable he reads 4
Newspaper article 70 you.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

1t will be hard work, indeed, for
the city fathers of Harrington to go
wrong. A clergyman has been desig-
mated by the mayor as chaplain of the
local legislative body and he will open
every meeting with prayer. We had
no idea that affairs were such with
the Harrington council that a chaplain
was needed
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

It's now up to President Roosevelt
20 make good his threat to veto the
public buildings bill as he said he
would If the house of representatives
did not make provision in the naval
bill for four big battleships
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
THE IAlMoRrAL.

Since my soul and are friends,
go laughing on my road:
Whether up or down It wends,
I have never felt my load.
For the winds keep tryst with me,
And the stars share in my 10y:
Meadow, hill or sky or sea,
create and destroy.
Hope or fear or bliss or woe
Fits a shadow on the sod:
Life and Death perpetual flow,
Underneath them am God
Smaller than the smallest part,
Larger than the moving Whole:
One in the divided heart
And the Universal soul.
Silent. deathless, centred fast,
Ancient. uncreated, free,
came not to birth at last
UniverseS are OF me.
Ellen Glasgow, In Harper's Magazine,
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Mr.. Dust is prominent candidate
Tor mayor of Milwaukee. He has
namesake in about every town who is
more or less in the public eye.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

If congress quits on May 8. which
is the date that has been set renta-
lively by the leaders for. the final
adjournment, many things will have
been left undone by the nat1onar law
makers which ought to have been
done. But thus it ever is.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Mr. Bryan declares that he is the
greatest beneficiary of the work done
by Mr.. Roosevelt in that the latter
has made the formers ideas "respec-
table," But being a beneficiary is
something quite different from being
an heir
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Mr.. Coburn's report on the condi-
tion of the wheat throughout the state
Is mighty encouraging. Once again
has old General Prosperity sounded
over Kansas the slogan on the horn
of plenty that everyone likes to hear
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

To transform the dignified thirty
fifth parallel of north latitude into a
macadamized roller skate, pedestrian
and automobile highway, to be con-
structed by the United States from the
blue Atlantic to the Golden Gate, via
RSewbern. N. c.. electric lighted, po-
Heed and bordered with new idea gar
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

Considering the temperature of the
weather it would seem a trife early
for community to get excited over a
mad dog" scare. But one such is in
progress in Douglass. The folks in
Butler county seem intent on taking
the lead in all things.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

sudden gust Of wind and a merry
widow hat met in collision on Kansas
avenue the other day, and, doubtful
though it may appear, the wind got the
better of the encounter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

:. The State Journal is a member Of the
associated Press and receives the full day
telegraph report of that great news Or
Ganization for the exclusive afternoon
publication in Topeka.
The news is received In The State Jour.
bose
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
When Britain Fought for an Ear.

Perhaps the most extraordinary ex-
ample of Britain going to war for mo
reason at alr' occurred in the reign of
George II.
One Robert Jenkins, an English mer-
chant captain. trading from Jamaica,
arriving in England in 1913. reported
that his sloop had been boarded by the
Spanish coast guards and that though
no proof Of smuggling had been found.
he had been tortured and his ear torn
off.
All England flew into an uproar,
Jenkins ear" divided parties and
shook Walpole's ministry itself. The
house Of commons sent for jenkins and
he was told to bring his ear with him.
The incident grew into a crisis,
though Walpole did his best to per-
suade people to keep their heads; but
the popular indignation was SO great
that next year the government was
compelled to declare war against Spain.
-Pearson's Weekly.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
Origin Of Hospitals.

Among the expenditures by states
and cities. those for the maintenance
OF hospitals always meet with the
hearty approval OF the public.
The work accomplished in hospitals
by boards of trustees and expert prac-
titioners OF medicine and surgery can
not be too highly praised. In populous
cities thousands OF individuals are
cared for annually, and q very large
percentage OF the cases are handled
successfully. Without these admirable
establishments. thousands OF the sick
and unfortunate might very easily
cease to exist.
Since the earliest times there have
designed for hospital work. although
at hrst they were little more than
shelters or cheaply built almshouses.
In the Roman camps there was a
medical stan to look after the
Among the earliest hospitals on rec
ord is that said to have been founded
by Valens in Caesarea 370-S0 A. D.,
and the one built in Rome by Fabiola.
Roman lady. although like most
both institutions probably were aims
houses as well.
The origin of our present hospitals
is traced to the monastic arrange
ments for the care Of the sick and In
digent- Every monastery once housed
the sick and convalesc cent.
Almost the earliest record of tho
building of a hospital in England is
in the life Of Lanfranc, archbishop OF
Canterbury. who in 1880 founded two,
one for leprosy and one for ordinary
diseases. In the eighteenth century
London, between 1719 and 1747, estab-
lished five public and five special hos
ptta1s. In Ireland, between 1925 and
1774 there were five public and three
special ones established in Dublin. one
in Cork, one in Limeric and in 1897
one in BelfdSt.-BOSton Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
McKinley's Face in Mirror.

Many callers at the office Of Gov.
Harris within the last week have been
startled by a reflection Of the face of
the bust OF Mckinley recently placed
in the executive office. In the mirror
over the large mantel as 1t is thrown
toward the main entrance. The refiec-
ton is purely accidental. but it gives a
side view Of the face, and the soft light
there, toned with the red shading of the
mahogany colored woodwork in the
vicinity, gives flesh and blood appear
ance to the features and such a silvery
color to the hair as McKinley's hair
would probably be showing II he were
still alive. 1t happens also that the
view of the face Of the bust shown
in the mirror is the one which is most
true to life. and the first unexpected
sight Of the face in the mirror causes
one familiar with the office when Nc
Kinley was governor to- wonder If he
has been dreaming that Mckinley is
still alive.-Columbus Dispatch.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

think If I was your own Iittie BOY you
wouldn't forget my name" he said.
eyes. Bobbie, dear-I mean Neo-
While John asks blessing on my
birthday gift."-(C opyrighted. 1909
by Associated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
Nos His Friend.

To the studio of an artist who has just
ident of a neighboring city a friend of
the sitter came to look at the newly
painted canvas. The visitor was uear-
Sighted ard not particularly well ac-
ouafnted with studies. He wanted to see
how good a likeness had been made of
his friend. He kept walking nearer and
out his finger as II to touch 1t.
The artist was getting nervous at the
approach of the finger to the paint and
he asked the visitor not to touch the
protrait rs It was not dry. The near
siEhted man put down his hand and
walked to the door. turning only to say.
ssIf Il isn't dry It Isn't my friend-" And
he walked out-Naw York Sun.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
The Population of Hawaii.

A Hawaiian gentleman who is
spending some time in Hartford dis
plays some figures concerning his ma
tive country that are calculated to pro-
woke thought. The islands. he says,
have a population Of about $50, 900, and
of this number more than $1,000 are
Japanese. Again, of the 1904 Protest
ant church members, 5.133 are Nor
mons. What do you think of that?"
he asks. "One-third Of our population
Japs. One-third of the Protestants
Mormons. Moreover, the Japs keep
coming. The number arriving last
years was 9,445. And again. Mormon
elders abound. Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17
Police Must Be Handsome.

In Paris, they demand beauty in the
police. 1t is a new idea credited to
the project Of police. NJ. Lepine, who
has suddenly found out that handsome
does who handsome Is. and very pro-
per- too. The average Paris policemen
are q seedy lot NJ. Lepine desires stall
wart beauties. He has succeeded in
making linguists Of q specimens. which
adds to the prestige Of France. but 1t
will be another matter to transform
the men into athletic Adonises.-Bos-
ton Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-04-17

It was not in his public address that
Senator Beveridge related this story.
but at an informal gathering of congen-
ial spirits. when 1 was boy at Adams
county, he said. Judge Blank was
taken very i'll. The doctor called regu-
larry. but the Judge kept getting worse.
Finally the crisis came. The morning
after the doctor called at the judges
house. I hope your masters tempera-
ture is lower than 1t was last even
ing said he to the butler.
"I'm not sure about that replied
the man; he died. sir. in the night /"
San Francisco Call.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1908-02-11
SOME NEwsY ITEMS.
Prom the Coast a. Told by tlle Gold
Reach Globe.

Prom the Coast a. Told by tbe Col,
Reach Globe.
Grass Is growing ani range stock
are hooking extra Wen The lambina
season has commenced. and II th,
mild weather continues good orol
of lambs Is assured
n che beautiful spr.ug weather OF
the past few DAYS continues a week
longer h will so lessen the water
supply that Il will drive the beach
minors from mining 10 making early
gardens
The o'd residents OF Coos and Coo,
countries learn with regret OF the
death of Father Helnrich. the pioneer
priest oi this section in the early
ios ile was man among men
liked ana respected by members Of
an crceds His death occurred AZ
Baker City, and was caused by pac-
ahsis ho Was so years old
Tho cruiser California ou her trial
irip went as Car north as Capo
hianco. ON am ayerage sncea of s2ls
knots pey hogr she hrcd each of
her rs suns Jhrye times during tho
trp while on this p'ace she ared
several shots, the Gar ot which was
fe,t here
q "a Crew succeeded IN kullns
aod securing a very nne aud valuable
SEA otter of Cane n'anoo. the skin
over si2 teet This Is no,
he nrst sea otter secured by Mr
rev, be being one OF the best ani
'ldost otter hunters on the coast
rhis otter Nas killed a week ag0 lass
saturday during one ot the severes.
'onthNesiers AZ ranse Of over SEQ
ards. and three out of four shots
ound their mark laslde Of as many
seconds. ieslityiag 10 his SKIN.