Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-10-23

dtiehCe-inut MISS beilOW is going
to sing. Patrice-Oh, is she? What
shall we talk about 1.-The Taller.
Prospective Country Boarder-is the
water won have here healthy Land
lady-Yes, sir We use only Well
water.-Boston Transcript
Mrs. Henpeck-You were talking In
your sleep last night, Henry. Mr..
Henpeck-I beg your pardon, my dear,
FOR having interrupted you.-Stray
Stories.
Sillicus-What do you consider is
the proper time for a man to marry?
Cynicus-Oh | suppose when he hasn't
anything else to worry him.-Philadel-
phia Record.
Departing Guest-We've had simp-
u delightful time Hostess-I'm so
glad. At the same time regret that
the storm kept all our best people
away,-Brooklyn Life.
Mrs, Bacon-This paper says that a
mans hair turns gray about FIVE years
earlier than a woman's Mr. Bacon.
all the tlme-Y oakers Statesman.
Elderly uncle-Spent your entire
patrimony, have you, Archibald? Gone
through everything? Scapegrace Neph-
ew--Yes, uncle, everything but the
bankruptcy court Chicago Tribune.
Faddist Vlsitor-~Are you allowed in
this prison any exercise beneficial for
your health2 Convict--Oh, yes, ma'am.
BY advice of my counsel have been
skipping the rope,--Baltimor Ameri-
can.
DO you play any instrument, Mr..
JlmpT yes, I'm a cornetist." And
your sister?' "She's pianist" Does
your mother play?" shes a zlther-
ist.' And your fatherf" Hes a pes
smist."
IF | We're you" said the old bache-
lor to the benedict, I'D either rule or
know why" We'll" was the reply,
''as already know why, l suppose
that's half the battle ATLANTA Con-
stitution
Dawson facial features plainly
indicate character and disposition In
selecting your wife were you governed
by her chin? Spenlow-No; but
have been ever since we were married.
Boston Globe.
Have you" asked the Judge OF a
recently convicted man. anything to
offer the court before sentence is
passed." mo, your honor" replied
the prisoner, my lawyer took my last
cent The Reporter.
Nlece-Uncle, they say that there are
more marriages OF blondes than OF bru-
nettes, Why is It, wonder7 Uncle
Singleton ca confirmed bachelor) -
HIM! Naturally, the llghtbeaded ones
go lirst--The Mirror.
Country Editor tout Westl This
has been a lucky day for me- Faith
full Wife--IIas some one been In to pay
a subscription? Edltor-Well, NO,
wasn't as lucky as that; but / was
shot at and missed New York Week
iy.
And do you like newspaper nen?''
he asked the little maid In a most con-
descending tone of voice. 81 don't
know" she replied artlessly; "the on
ly one l know Is the one who brings
our paper every morning. "-Lippin-
colts Magazine.
Farmer Barker want to get a
present TO take home to my wife on
/ fut mt N
she like pie knife? Farmer Barker
Good land, young mani Amt you
never been told you mustn't eat pie
with no knife7-New York Times.
The little girl was very fond of plea
SAINT days, and at the close Of a heavy
rainstorm petitloned In her prayer for
| fine weather; when the next morning
the sun shone bright and clear she
became jubilant, and told her prayer
to her grandmother. who said. "Well,
dear, why can't you pray tonight that
| II may be warmer tomorrow 80 that
grandma's rheumatism VIII be better?''
"All right. | will" was the quick re-
sponse; and that night as she knelt
tSiAS S1to " iSNiht ptSttEF Atllh mt ~ upk
| for grandma"
| Grubb-I hear your last novel has
already appeared in It's sixth edition.
How did you manage to become so
phenomenally popular2 Scrubb-yery
simple. | put personal" in the pa
pers saying that / was looking for q
wife who is something like the hero
inc of my novel. Within two days the
| first edition was sold OUTFIT Bits.
"Why, that's regular little print
ing press, isn't itT' remarked the Wis.,
itor yes" replied Mrs popley,
"wiHie's uncle gave 1t to him on his
birthday" what a complete little
thing It's self-inking, isn't TT? II
don't know but Willie Is"
Now, Pat would you sooner Iosa
your money or your lifeT why, me
loife, yer reverence; l want me money