davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

After all, its the weather maa who gets it in the neck more than anyone else.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

The City of Paris has S7,000 trees, some of which are family trees. we presume.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Governor FoiIx's mother said she never had to spank him when he was boy However, it is to be inferred that she used some other mode of pun ishment equally effective.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Carry Nation says she will never go to hell. This Is encouraging to tn e greater majority who are headed that way.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Books are kept at the Russian rail road stations in which passengers may register complaints. Isn't this merely Q stroke of policy to court popular
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

The ordinary pin was invented by blacksmith's son. but woman evidentl, created the need for 1t.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

About the time that . man makes ID his mind he understands women, he he does not" says The Montgomery Advertiser When he finds out lt was n set of furs and not q few handker- ent. for instance.--WashinE inEton Herald.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Drift Armstrong wants the union te put the ban on the red-headed ans dinpled widows, despite the fact tha circulation. Drift wants 'possufsa to b, made the standard of value.--HoustoI Post.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Joel Chandler Harris visited Presi- dent Roosevelt recently. He must have made a good impression as he has sub scribed to Uncle Remus's Magazine"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

Your daughter can certainly reach the high notes, can't sheT'
 Well, she ought to; they came high enough"
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

A Missouri farmer lost a plug of to- what had become of 1t untii he milked the COW in the evening. $ The brute drank. from astagnant pool. gave seven quarts of line drug store whiskey, q quart of red pepper. a gallon of prsanes and lot of rain water.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

s5oo,eoo. Be "kearful," Charles.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-01-17

A man in Pennsylvania attempted to commit suicide the other day By lying across the railroad track. but he starv- along.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
AWFUL EFFECT OF ECZEMA.

Covered with Yellow Sores-Grew
Worse - Pnrcats Discouraged
Cutfcura Drove Sores Away.
''Opr little giTl, one year and a half
old, was taken with eczema or that
was what the doctor called 1t. We took
her to three DOCTORS but by this time
she was nothing but yellow, green
ish sore. One morning we discovered
a little yellow pimple on one Of her
eyes. Doctor No. 3 said that we had
better take her to some eye specialist,
since 1t was an ulcer. So we went to
Oswego to doctor No. 4, and he said the
eyesight was gone We were nearly
discouraged, but I thought We would
try the Cuticura Treatment, so I pur-
chased set Of Cuticura Remedies,
which cost me 81, and In three days
our daughter, who had been sick about
eight months, showed great improve
ment and in one week all sores had
disappeared. OF course 1t could not
restore the eyesight, but If we had
used Cuticura in time am confident
that it would have saved the eye. Mrs
Frank Abbott, X. r. d. No. 8, Fulton,
Oswego Co., N. Y, Aug. IL, 1906"
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Catarrh Cannot Be Cured

with LOCAL APPLICATIONS, as they can
not reach the seat Of the disease. Catarrh
Is blood or constitutional disease, and in
order to cure Ii you must take internal rem
edies. Halls Catarrh Cure Is taken inter-
nally, and acts directly On the blood and
mucous surfaces Halls Catarrh Cure is not
a quack medicine. II was prescribed by one
of the best physicians in this country for
with the best blood purifiers, acting directly
on the mucous surfaces. The perfect COM
bination OF the two ingredients Is what pro-
duces such wonderful results in curing Ca
tarrh. Send for testimonials free.
+. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by Druggists, price 75c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
MrscHrEr FLIES DO.
This Insect Is the yeritabIe Angel
of Pestilenee.

This Insect Is the yeritabIe Angel
of Pestilenee.
One by one the plaques Of Egypt are
being abolished by science. The frogs
were abolished long ago by the drain
tile. The feas are checked by insect
powder, and the darkness that could
be felt has melted away before the arc
light. The sixth plague still remains
in full glory. The fly is always with
us. The great DR.. Radcliffe used 10
declare that the three worst annoy
ances Of life were smoke, flies and ir-
relevant questions. Humanity has
hitherto accepted these with a patient
shrug of the shoulders as among the
inevitable. s..#H 81.
At last the worm has turned. 1t Is
proceeding slowly to put on smoke con-
sumers, and has declared a war Of ex-
termination against the fly. The mo-
tiyes which whet hitherto easily
blunted purpose are supplied by SCI.
ence. They are, first, that flies carry
disease; second, that their very pres
ence is a sign of dirt.
That the fly is frequently the angel
of the pestilence has long been suspect
ed, says Golfers in an important ar
ticle, but its most vivid and impress
sive demonstration was furnished By
the disgraceful death rate from ty-
phoid, one of the most scandalous Of
the many murders of official stupidity,
In our camps in the South during the
Spanish-American war. 1t was clear
ly proved by the eminent commission
Of experts, who investigated the STU
alton postmortem, that the principal
means of the spread of this dreaded
disease was the flight Of flies from the
excreta of the earliest cases to the food
exposed in the camp kitchens, carrying
the typhoid germs on their legs and
DroboSces
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
PkTICS&ak,
@OLITIelANNS

Jackson Day at Chicago was q far
different affair from that of the New
York gathering. There the banquet Civ
en- by the Jefferson Club was the scehe
of Bryan love feast, in which 600 Dem
ocrats cheered riotously the words of the
Nebraskan. .....
Viscount Aoki. the retiring Japanese
ambassador, in an interview at San Fran
cisco, declared in positive terms that
there could be no such thing at present
as war between this country and Japan.
He said the questions at issue were not
such as would cause war and that all
the high officials of Japan were convinced
of the good faith and friendship of this
country.
Secretary Taft who will soon begin fhe
preparation of an extended report on his
observations in the Philippines, in q re-
cent interview expressed himself as highly
pleased with the progress already made
in the islands. Peace, he says, prevails
throughout the Philippines to a greater
extent than ever before in their history.
and agriculture is proceeding without fear
from predatory bands. He finds the ma
tives receptive to education and to mod
ern western conceptions of religion and
politics, and says there is no difference
between the educated and the ignoran.
Filipino that cannot be overcome by the
education of one generation. The Secre-
tary thinks the people should not be in
trusted with self-government until their
primary and industrial education is CON-
plete, and this may require more than a
generation owing to lack of funds for
educational purposes.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Military Men Say Force Is Reduced
Beyond Point of Safety for
the Nation.
NEED OF REFoRM IN SERVICE.
Low Pay and Requirement of Hard
Practice Marches Are Main
Points of Attack.

The War and Navy Departments are
trying to reach an agreement by which
the marines are to be withdrawn from
the Isthmus of Panama and two regL,
ments of infantry are to be sent to take
their places as guards. It is fully e,c
pected that before long two regiments
or foot will be on their way to the
canal zone. This diverting of army
regulars to new field will mean that
the forces in the United States are to
be depleted beyond that which officers
believe to be the danger point.
The infantry probiam is one Of the
most serious factors in the greater
problem of the army's weakness. On
paper we are supposed to have 10000
infaHtryinen, but in truth we have 10th
ing like that number. and unless the
Increase of pay bill pass Congress, it is
perfectly evident that the ranks will
be thinned still further An army Off
Ger who knows conditions tells Wash
ington correspondent that in a case Of
emergency there would be less than
1000 infartrymen who could be brought
with anything like dispatch to any
threatened point within the limits of
the United States proper. ~
There are two chief army measures
now before Congress, one dealing with
the matter of the increase of pay and
the other dealing with the matter of
the increase of the infantry. A CORE
spondent says there is precious little
hope that both bills can pass. 1t prob
ably would be folly to pass the second
bill without passing the first, for it
would be useless to provide for an in
crease in the ranks if no inducements
were held out by which the increase
could be effected.
Interviews with enlisted men disclose
three chief objections to army life, and,
in order of numerical precedent, they
rank like this:
Monthly practice marches.
Poor pay.
Non-military duty required Of the en-
listed men. .sa-. ..'
Some Of the ranking officers of the
army have inveighed constantly against
what they call the folly of the frequent
practice marches. The men are kept in
fine physical condition and as hard as
walnuts through the daily drills, the
guard duty, the good food, and the reg
ular living generally. Yet they are
compelled at least once a month to
hike out on the road under heavy bur-
dens and trying conditions for the pur-
pose of keeping in trim so that they
will be ready for the field in case Of
hostilities. The practice march, fairly
long continued and to come at long in
tervals, has its uses, and the men like
it; but they don't like it coming as it
does every three or four weeks.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

An effort is being made to encourage
the diamond cutting industry at Cape
Town. The work has been heretofore
done almost exclusively at Amsterdam,
but at present great deal of this work
Ii being done in the United States.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
The virginia PlOver.

The most wonderful bird flight noted
is the migratory achievement Of the
Virginia ployer, which leaves it's
haunts in North America and, taking
q course down the Atlantic, reaches the
coast Of Brazil in one unbroken flight
Of fifteen hours, covering a distance Of
over 1900 miles at the rate of four
miles a minute.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Different.

The burglar had gathered up all the
galuables.
Just as he was about to depart the
light of his lantern flashed upon the
face OF a golden-haired child, asleep.
The burglar departed just the same.
He was no story-book burglar.-PhiL
idelphia Ledger.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Making Things Even.

Customer Ito watchmaker)-I told
you that my watch lost half an hour
rery day, and now that you've repair
ed it 1t gains half an hour.
Watchmaker-Well, don't complain.
It's only working to catch up lost time.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Perfectly Clear,

Teacher--Tommy, the lesson speaks of
the thread of life" Does that convey
any idea to you?
Tommy Tucker-Yes'm. That's what
you feel when you've got stitch in your
side.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

A "1O-penny nail" means that 1000
nails weigh ten pounds. The word
penny" in this sense is a corruption Of
pound .... D..
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Total

AOtoi .@i.oO
Above is sufficient seed to grow % bu.
of rarest vegetables and thousands of
brilliaut flowers, and all is mailed to you
POSTPAID FOR 12C,
or II you send lGc, we will add pack
age of Berliner Earliest Caulifower.
John A. Salzer Seed Co., La Crosse,
Wis. G. n. u.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

30. johnny exclaimed Mrs. Lap
sling. You've worn out those shoes al.
ready, and / got them for you now inst
after we had our last eguiuox:ous
storm"
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
An Unfortnnate Interrun,,on

George was Just going to propose.
to me last night"
And what happened?'
y tire blew up, and then he couldn'r
think Of anything else" e"--Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

Only One s'BROMo QUININE"
That Is LAXATIVE BROMO QUININE. Loo
for the signature of Z. W. GROVE. Used tn
World over to Cure Cold In One day. %,
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Something New Under the sun.

A lady in Illinois sent us lie year
ago for our remarkable collection of vege-
;able and flower, seeds and sold $3T.76
worth therefrom, or made 3l4 per cent.
That's new.
just send this notice with 12c and re-
teive the most original seed and plant
.af a
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

WE SELL GUNS AND TRAPS CHEAP buy
furs and hides. or tan them for robes and rugs
N. w. HIDE and FUR CO., Minneapolis
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

- - c - yitus' Dance and su gsrysls py.....,
. Permanently tured ny Or Kl.ss rts.--.
revvs Restorvt e-rd ~ Free az irfi +.ss...s
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Rev. George A. E. Troutma
Washington, Mo, Writes,
my Wife and | Are Strong
Believers in Pe-ru-na."
Cntarrti and ia 1;ripcc.

Rev. Geo. A. E. Troutman, Mt.
Washington, Mo-, writes: "My wife
and are strong believers In Peruna.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

Entry lay now be made by proxy (on certain
eohonions}, by TIE father, mother, son. daughter.
brother or s.s isr of az intending honesteader.
thoEHands of hornssteads of I60 acres each are,
ti's Row easily ottainable In these great grain
if"wir9. Isoc--s@.sinG and mixed farming sec
GCns.
ihere yoa VIII fnd heslthiui climate good
netghoors, churches for family worship. schools
for your children, good laws, splendid crops,
and railroads convenient TO market.
Entryfee IN each case Is 5000. For pamphlet,
Last Best West, particulars as to rates. ro .cs.
best time TO go and whctc to locate. apply -
". ID Scott, Superintendent OF Immigration.
OttaNa, canada. or T.. T. Holmes 1IS Jackson
Si., p; Paul, Minn, and J. NJ. MacLachlan Box
meut Agents.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23
Peruna in Tablet Form.

For two years DIR. Hartman and his
assistants have necessarily labored to
create Peruna in tablet form, and their
strenuous labors have just been crowned
with success. People who object to
liquid medicines can now secure Peruna
Tablets. which represent the medicinal
ingredients of Peruna. Each tablet 10
equivalent to one average dose Of
Peruna.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1908-01-23

ASK Your Druggist for Free Peruna Almanac for 1908
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-30
RULES TO PROTECT
STUPID PLAYERS

CINCINNATI. Ohio. November 3O.-It
mas been suggested that the base ball rule
which made the Merkle play possible in
New York last season be altered SO that
If a batter makes hit a man can score
from third base, whether man on first
reaches second or not. The umpire must
judge whether or not a hit was made.
President Garry Hermann OF the ma
tional commission when he heard Of the
proposed change. said: Such a thing
would be impossible. EMPIRES cannot
manufacture hits. 1t is not up to him
to make hits for the players; they must
do that themselves.
Instead of thinking about changing
that rule. the owners who are consider
ing such thing had better get busy
and tell their players not to overlook
the fine points Of the game.
THAT rule is as necessary as any in
the book. and 1t should not be changed
wouldn't like to pc an umpire If it was
up to me to decide whether or not a
player had made a hit, II the result of the
game depended upon the decision.
eff the rules governing base ball are
changed to conform with the ideas of
few would-be reformers. who are anxious
to let the Giants down easy for making a
stupid play, which lost the National
League championship for them, the UNI
pires in the big leagues will have more
trouble than ever
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-30
AUTOMOBILE RACE.
Hervey Machen Victor in Contest
From This CITY to Baltimore.

HYATTSVILLE Md, November 3O.-
Considerable local interest was manifest
ed in the automobile race yesterday over
the Washington Baltimore boulevard
from the District of Columbia line to
Baltimore between Mr.. Hervey g. Ma
chen Of this place and Mr.. Samuel B.
Rose of the Arm Of Rose Bros, Wash
ington. Mr. Machen. driving a four-cyl-
inder Ford runabout. captured the race
and incidentally a purse of $50 from his
Washington rival. who managed a four
cylinder Franklin runabout. Mr.. Ma
chen left the District of Columbia line
in the morning at 1915 o'clock and made
the run to Baltimore without mishap In
one hour and FIVE minutes. Mr.. Rose,
who left the starting point 1--WE minutes
earlier, was not SO fortunate. his ma
chine being disabled about ten miles
south Of Baltimore. and he was unable
to proceed. He did not get the machine
In shape until Mr. Machen had been to
the Eutaw House, in Baltimore. as per
agreement. and returned to the point
where he broke down. Mr.. Rose did not.
of course, go to Baltimore. but returned
TO Washington. On the return trip Mr..
Machen's machine became disabled the
other side of College Park, and Mr.. Her
man T.. Burgess went to his rescue and
towed. the vehicle into HyattsXile, where
a large crowd of Mr. Machen's admirers
welcomed and congratulated him.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-30
WILD SCENES OF JOY
AT OLD WEST POINT

WEST POINT. n. Y. November 30
For over two hours yesterday afternoon
the cadets owned the academy and West
Point fairly went delirious with joy on
the arrival of the team. Never before
has team received such an ovation as
the victors were given.
Long before the arrival of the special
bearing the men the corps of cadets were
at the station. together with the entire
populace of the post and a goodly portion
from surrounding towns. AS the train
pulled in to the station the blast of the
locomotive was drowned by the cheers of
the students. who boarded the cars before
they had fairly stopped, and. seizing the
men. carried them to the waiting omni-
busses. The soldiers car was detached
and a long rope made fast The cadets
then dragged the gridiron warriors up
the long steep hill to the foot ball field.
driving under triumphal arch with
YArmy 6-Navy A. on letters four feet
high. with cartoon of a cadet riding
the Navy goat underneath. Right out to
the middle of the field, upon which the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-30
BASE, BALL NIMRODS
LOST IN THE WOODS

CHICAGO, November so President
Charles A. Comiskey Of the White Sox
and party of his friends returned
Saturday from a hunting trip IN the
wilds Of Canada. They report all kinds
Of daring adventures. rescues and other
experiences that make q hunting expedi-
ton exciting.
Some of the party were lost for several
hours in the woods. while on their way
home. and had it not been for a chance
meeting with an Indian guide, might still
be trampng about the woods seeking the
trail out
President B. B. Johnson who went into
the woods with the party, returned Mon
day of last week. He came out of the
woods via river. and sent the guide
PACK with the boat for the remainder OF
the party. A real northern snow storm
set In just as the guide was leaving: and
the latter refused to make the return trip
for fear Of having his boat frozen in the
Ice, In which case he would have been
an easy victim of wolves.
The Comisley party waited four days
for the return OF the guide. and then
started to hnd their own way out Of
the thfcket. They wandered around all
day, not knowing just where they were
going, until they picked up the Indian
guide. when it was almost dark. The In
dian led the way into Deerfeld. a distance
Of twenty miles or more. from which place
the party boarded the train for home.
The base ball ninrods thought to have
great sport in the wild country, but de-
cided yesterday that Mercer, Wis, was
wild enough for them.
The question of a new park for the
White Sox was not taken seriously by
President Comiskey. The owner of the
south side club said Of the rlmors he
would seek new location for the White
| Sox park:
1t seems large number Of persons
have interested themselves In building a
new park for the White Sox on paper.
When we do have a new park we want
one with improved stands and everything
that goes to make up a great base ball
plant We do not want a park made on
paper. for 1t would not help US much in
winning a pennant.'
President comiskey admitted. however.
ne is considering plans for a new plant
at the present time. ,
President johnson of the American
League returned yesterday morning from
| Cincinnati. where he spent Thanksgiving
day with his parents. He stated last
night that the report on the charge Of
collisions with scalpers which has been
filed with the national commission against
the Chicago National League club will
be announced on December Z. when the
commission meets in New York. The
National League is scheduled for its an
nual meeting ON December 8 and the
American League on December 9. The
report Of the commission will likely be
read before an informal gathering of the
club owners of both leagues.
President Johnson refused to state what
was the text Of the report as compiled by
the commission.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-30
NEW OFFICIALS FOR
GOLF ASSOCIATION

NEW YORK. November 30.-The United
States Golf Association is preparing to
"clean the slate" SO far as the list of
officials is concerned When the ticket
Is presented by the nominating committee
only a few Of the. present officers and ex-
ecutive committee will be named. 1t is
understood that the west will have the
scantiest of representation. which will
give the dissatisfied element In the Chi
cago district a chance for another pro-
test"
Herbert Jacques OF Boston has been
mentioned as the likely successor to
Daniel Chauncey of this city, who is now
completing his second term as presi-
dent. Silas H. Strawn OF Chicago has
been retained as one Of the vice presi-
dents, but Alexander Britton of Wash
ington will probably be succeeded. W..
Fellowes Morgan of this city. the secre-
tary. remains on theoticket. Samuel Y.
Heebner, the long-serving treasurer, has
declined to run again. Heebner has held
the office for the last eight years.
OF the committeeman 1t Is understood
that ]. D. Cady of Moline. ILL.,, and c. F.
Thompson Of Quitman, Miss. are to be
erner declares these men have proved
themselves too progressive to suit those
in control Of the L. s. G. A. affairs. 1t
is not known whether Leighton Calkins of
Plainfleld will be retained.
Another change decided upon is the
meeting place, When the associate
delegates gather In executive session in
January it will be at Sherry's instead Of
Demonicos