Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-01-25
around hereY' called Humpy from the

around hereY' called Humpy from the
other side of the gate.
There's one right across the road
but I'm not saying that she does her
duty by her children gadding around
as she does every day in the week"
Humpy took a long look at the house
opposite and then crossed the street
and rang the bell Again it was Mrs.
Mcclure who came to the door. and,
not seeing a parcel in his hand, she
broke out with:
Il paid dollar ten for corset yes
terday, and it was to come ND before
night. It's not here yet, and you tell
the girl who sold it to me and gave
me her solemn promise that I'm get
ting dressed to waltz down there and
give her bit of my mind"
I'm not a parcel boy. ma'am," re-
piled Humpy.
mo? Then who are your
"Have you got husband. ma'amg'
Il have"
Does he ever climb ladders?'
'sHe does. He'll climb anything from
a glass of beer to the steeple of
church. He's been trying for the last
five years to climb into Office, but it
makes his head dizzy"
''Ma'am. l have to tell you-that is,
l was sent here to say-that Isl
THAT is, that my man Joe is drunk
again and the police have got him this
time and will give him thirty days.
All right 1t was that Mcclure across
the street that sent you, and do you go
back and tell her that she's no lady"
But ma'am"-
Get a move on your
Humpy moved. Half a block down
the street he stopped beside a carpen-
ter repairing a fence and asked him If
there were any other McGuires on the
street
about ten others" was the reply.
TRY the next door
1t was tried Mrs Mcclure came TO
the door with a fea Their buster in her
hand and a scowI on her face and
wanted to know why Humpy was try
ing to pull the dOorbell out by the
roots.
You have got husband. haven't
yOu! he querled in reply.
''You impudent sasSbox, would I be
living with a man for the last TWEEN
ty years and he not my husbands"
your husband went away this morn
ing feeling all right didn't hep"
Humpy Gets Nervous.
"He did that. How else should he
feel when he's got the best wife on the
street? What do you stand there swal-
lowing your tongue for? Has my man
been throwing another car off the track
and dislocating the conductors shout
der? If he mas, then he can pay. his
own fine"
Madam, regret to be the bearer
the-bearer"- 49,
Sand what is it that you are bear
ing? If it's the ice or milk bill, out
with it! I've got something to do be
sides standing here Ginning with .
boy that can't speak English r.
well, then. your husband fell fropa
a ladder down on Arch street and
broke his leg and has been sent to the
hospital" 81 F1 e.s.
"Oh. he has?" smiled the woman
MY son. step INSIDE minute. DO
you see that sleeping form on the
lounge there? That's what they calls
a recumbent attitude. That's the man
we have been talking about That's
my husband. He was out on spree
last night"
Humpy turned to fee, but he was
not quite quick enough. He was hit on
the head with a buster, and a large and
liberal foot helped him off the step.
The man who was repairing the fence
advised him to try three or four other
houses, but the boy had become dis
couraged. He headed for home and
didn't stop until he got there. AS he
entered the house his mother asked:
"Why, Humpy, how does it happen
that you got out of school go early?"
He explained, and when he had fin
ished she said:
''Poor boy. you did not find the
right Mrs. Mcclure. 1 am the one,
and now if you will kindly step into
the wood shed with me Wen find out
who fell down a ladder and who fell
up oner' If. QUAD.
Ia,., MD