davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Jonson; there is already too much John
son in the city directory
This is why they call him Rare Ben Jon
son. Chicago Tribune, ~
"Oh. Tom, have I got 'em again" moaned
the unsteady young man. II certainly see
a big hat coming up the street by ITSELF
swear / dor
BE calm, JIM said the faithful Tom
ITS all right about the hat. There's q
woman under 1t. '-Baltimore American.
rs your husband a man of presence OF
mind?'
Indeed he is"
What would he do II he happened to go
downstairs at night and run into a burg
lar?'
He would wish he hadn't happened to go
downstairs. Houston Post. tr
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

There are not 1000 men in Amer
ica who. after they have had three
drinks, can tell what they are drink
ing" said Congressman Champ Clark
to the ways and means committee.
Well, the average man, after three
drinks, does not care what he is drink
ing.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24
IRTHFUL

An interview with the Kaiser had been
suppressed.
Good" said the yellow correspondents.
Fine! Now we can put anything We want
into that interview"
Immediately they all got busy.-Philadel-
phia Ledger.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Some folks are still wondering why
the kaiser did not dispose of the case
by putting Germany In jail.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24


The Sugar trust denies that it gave
short weights. Perhaps it lacked the
sand.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

The divinity that is supposed to
hedge a king appears to have beer
neglecting its duty at Berlin.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

1t will be up to Mr.. Bryan to make
good as self-appointed guardian of the
coming democratic legislature in his
home state.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

mo, my husband isn't going down town
his morning, there's SC mething wrong with
his epiglottis.
"Mabe my husband has one that he can
lend him, he always keeps extra parts for
his to."-Houston Post.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

1t is now proposed to increase the
tariff on lead. Kentucky and Ten
nessee would be better off If the tariff
on lead were made prohibitive.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

II the weather man dislikes one
thing more than another, it is to be
'~'seasonable" with his wares.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Oscar Hammerstein appears to have
been trying to equal Senator Platt's
record as a writer of love letters.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Shell understand that drinking is one
of your failings,
one OF my pronounced successes.-Chicago
Journal
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

The kaiser has agreed to shut up,
but not to stay shut up.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Who are the p%oliticians?" asks the
Chicago Inter Ocean. why are the
politicians!
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

San Francisco probably is not try
ing to equal Pittsburg's record.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

'There is one remnant we have still left
of the days chivairy," she remarked, colby,
as her erring spouse flushed guilty. under
the recollection Of the evening before, out
with the boys"
what is it," he asked, suspiciously.
9TH nights errant," she replied, Sharply
Baltimore American.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24
srAEMrNT OF c1RC1uATIoN.

STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION.
State Of Nebraska, Douglas Count, S.:
Bee Publishing company. being duly sworn.
says that the actual number OF full and
complete copies OF The Daily, Morning,
Evening and Sunday Bee printed during the
month of 0ctnhar 1909 was AZ follows.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

The Inventor of the gas meter is
dead, but his works live after him and
promise to go on forever.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Missouri went republican" explains
Champ Clark, because Of an unusual
concentration of unusual circum-
stances, which, on the doctrine Of
probabilities, will not be duplicated in
forty years" Whatever Clark means,
we are disposed TO agree with him
for once.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24
WHEN OUT OF TOWN.

Subscriber leaving the city tenn
porarily should have The Dee
mailed to them. Address will he
changed as often as requested.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Net total .1,1e5,5s
Daily average ......,,..,.. 3 7,6o9
GEORGE B. TzSCHUCK,
Treasurer.
Subscribed in my presence and sworn to
before me this Slst day Of october, 1908,
M. p. WALKER.
Notary Puhllc.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Gabriel-wasn't that spirit satisfied with
her halo?
ST. Peter-No, she said 1t wasn't nearly
as large as her winter hat.-New York Sun.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

Now we're worn an ould an sick
But there's JOY to think. avic,
That we niYer held a brick.
An there's some that can't say that.
So they needn't be so SLY " '
When they smile an cock their eye,
All thin lads, when we go by, ,
You an me, Guild hat.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

A ease OF voluntary bankruptcy at
Council BLUFFS involves a lot OF people
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24
THE oULD HIGH HAT.

T. A. DAILY in Catholic Standard and Time'
o! we needn't be so sly,
All we lads, when l go by,
Wild your winkin' o. the eye
An your smirkin' an all that.
Shure, I'm wise enough to see m
That the cause OF all your glee
Is the ancient cut o. me
An me ould high hat.
Arrah! lads must have their play,
So I've not a word to say;
It's meseP that vance was gay
AS the gayest wan o. you.
Shure, there wasn't nanny men
That would joke about me then,
When me blood was young an when
This ould hat was newsa rsisor 1f.
1t was wild me an me bride
When the blessid knot was tied;
An 1t followed, when she died,
Where they soon will lay me-, too A
II has served me all these years,
Shared me laughter an me tears, '
As it's sharin' now the jeers
o. the likes o. you,
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

DAAN ~ kNANnUhA ohAhaeeNH tht
Daily Bee and Sunday, one year,, gu
DELIVERED BY CARRIER:
Daily Bee Qnelduing sunday. per week. .l5e
Daily Bee without Sunday, per week .1oc
Evening Bee without Sunday, per week &c
Evening Bee with sunday, per week. l9c
Sunday Bee, one year
Saturday Bee, one LOU
Address all complaints OF irregularities
in delivery TO City Circulation Department
OFFICES.
Omaha-The Bee Building.
South Omaha-Twenty-fourth and N.
Council Bluffs-1B Scott street.
Chicago-t54s Marquette Building.
New York - Rooms 110l-1102 No. "a west
Thirty-third street.
Washington-Ts Fourteenth street. N. w.
u CORRESPONDENCE.
Communications relating TO news and edi-
torial matter should be addressed: Omaha
Bee, Editorial Department.
REMITTANCES.
Remit by draft, express or postal order
payable 10 The Bee Publishing company.
Only 2-cent stamps received in payment OF
mall accounts. Personal checks, except on
Omaha or eastern exchanges, not accepted.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

why do you omit the n from your
name. Benz" asked viii Shakespeare one
day.
oFor the sake of variety" nswercd Mr.,
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24
TENS or strBsCRTPTIoN:

Entered at omshs postoffice as second
class matter.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

'"There are some Inaccuracies as well as
some very trite material In that historical
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

YES" nswcred Miss Cayenne, It's like
most Of them. The parts that are novel
are not historical and the parts that are
historical are not novel."-Washington star.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

VICTOR RosEwATER. EDITOR.
Omaha daily bee., 1908-11-24

BY EDWARD RosEwATER.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
Roosevelt's One Best Bet.

In the fifteen years he has been
prominently in the public eye. Theo-
dore Roosevelt has demonstrated that
he is master of the science Of poll
tics By the force and vehemence OF
his diction he has overthrow and
crushed out any man or influence
that presumed 10 question either his
judgment or his veracity. Distin'
gulsh men like William T.. Chandler
Of Maine, BENJAMIN X. Tillman OF
South Carolina. Joe Bailey OF Texas.
Chancellor Day. Professor Long-all
Of them incurred the presidential dis
pleasure and were promptly assigned
TO their places in the ranks Of 'un'
desirable citizens Evcu so distin'
guished a figure as Judge Alton II.
Parker was branded with the Ne
direct. when. as candidate against
Roosevelt for the presidency. he
dared TO tell what all the world now
knows was the truth about the slush
fund raised by the republican com
mittcc from the trusts and railroads
to insure his defeat.
In dozen sensational newspaper
controversies before the American
public. Theodore Roosevelt pulled out
OF critical situation with flying col
ors hut now in The closing hours OF
mis- reign he has consigned a man TO
the bench OF Oblivion who refuses 10
stay consigned For the first time In
his umultuous career he has cncoun'
tered man who refuses TO be a
scoundrcl i'm silence. because Teddy
chooses TO label him scoundrel For
/ the FIRST time in his public career he
| has encountered man who, when
| lied about has the courage TO de-
nounce the liar, and the resource'ul'
ness 10 convict him before the great
est human tribunal-the dispassion'
ate opinion OF the American people.
Teddy IL a wise old owl. but for
once he got into the wrong tree when
| he tried to crush and destroy the
| Governor of Oklahoma by the mere
weight OF his dictum
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
Taking Too Much.

Once upon a time Oklahoma had n
territorial governor who had a son
who talked too much Now IL ap-
pears taht the United States has a
president who has a son-in law who
talks too much. Either Theodore
Roosevelt and his entire crow! Of
advisers have gone politically mad or
Nick Longworth needs bad half
hour with his bg-stick fsther.in-law
cut In the woodshed. In n speech the
other day Nick trumphantly declared
that father-in-law Teddy meant to
States permanently in the family.
Wen elect Taft for four years and
then for four years more. and after
that We will re-elect Theodore Roose.
welt for another eight years" boast.
ingly declared son-in-law Mock. Is
Nicholas batty or has the whole pres,
idential political family gone bug.
house? It's little too early IN the
history of the American republic &c
declare for a dynasty and arrange the
matter OF sixteen years in the future
Time will prove whether, Roosevelt
lis responsible for his son-in-law''
speech. II he isn't he will have Il
deny responsibility. II he leaves tha
speech unchallenged it brands hin
before the American public as mar
who sspires, In the year of our Lord
sOS, to subyert the principles OF on
American government and assum,
the role OF dictator in the monarch.
which takes its place.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

The recent wreck on the Frisco
near Fl Reno revealed some funny
happenings, as always occurs. One
old gentleman, who rolled over with
one of the rear coaches, waited un-
III all the passengers had been
picked out of the debris when he
went back and searched through It
for his magazine he had befn read
ing at the time OF the accident, and
finding II sat down and contin-
ued his story until the relief train
came along and picked him up.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
Figure Your own Taxes.

II isn't necessary for any taxpayer
to allow any one TO deceive him about
what his state taxes are going 10 be.
II you will 90 10 Tho county clerks
office and see what the assessed val
uation Of your farm or personal prop
erty is. YOU can tell IN three minutes
what your state taxes will be. The
state levy is one and a fourth mills
or the dollar.
That means simply that for every
dollar OF valuation your property will
have to pay one and a fourth mills
toward the support Of the state gov.
ernment. lust take tho valuation in
dollars and multiply by one and a
fourth and then point off three deci'
maj points. That Will give YOU your
state taxes in dollars and cents.
II must also be remembered that
your state taxes will be only a small
portion of the total fax YOU must pay
but It Is The only tax with which the
state officers or state administration
have anything 10 do with lcvyiag or
collecting.
This levy OF one and fourth mills
is made to cover all the expense OF
state government, and IS all the
money raised By taXatio" for that
purpose. Your other tax Is for the
expense OF your county, township and
school district government, and tho
levy for thccs added taxes IS made by
your board OF county commissioners
/ absolutely independent of the state
/ officials or the state tax board.
| For instance. the republican
/ speakers and republican papers are
| pointing out numerous instances in
Noble county where they claim the
taxes on certain farms will be more
| than doubled, and are charging il all
M to democratic eXtravagance.
, The facts OF the matter are that the
farm lands of Noble county will pay
less money In state taxes this year
than they paid last year in territorial
taxes.
A farm valued at $4,000 would pay
only s5.25 state taxes. 4 farm valued
at $4,000 would pay only slo.50 state
taxes.
Where does the other 500 whict
those republican papers and speakers
say you are going TO have 10 pa,
come from. 1t comes from your re
publican board OF county commits
sioners in noble county. How cal
the democratic state officials preven
republican board of county com
mlssioners from collecting an enor
mously high county tax? The hXini
OF ,he levy for county purposes 4
entirely In the hands OF he count
board OF each county, and n YOU
taxes arc higher this year than tho
we're last your board OF county con
missioners are the men whom yo
should look to for an explanation, an
not to the democratic state admin
istration
The democratic state adminstratlo
has eexrcised the utmost caution an
economy in expenditures in order
keep down the burden OF taxes. The
7 have reduced the direct tax for th
support OF the state government
, a figure lower than that assessed {
r pay the expenses OF territorial go
, ernment. II your taxes are highe
? this year than last fix the responsible
\ ity where II belongs,
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
TWO CENT FARE.

Before the admission OF Oklahoma
into the Union, three cents mile
was the minimum passenger fare on
all railroads operating in the state.
Under the Oklahoma constitution.
written by 90 democrats. twelve re-
publicans and one Independent, two
cents mile is the maximum rate
which any railroad is allowed TO
charge, unless the management can
prove. to the satisfaction of the cor.
poration commission that higher
rate Is necessary I'm order that The
road may be operated at profit
With the exception OF one or two
branch lines. the two.ceut fare is in
force throughout the state
What this provision alone saves TO
the people OF Oklahoma in a single
year * hard 90 estimate. but II will
undoubtedly amount to more than all
the taxes collected TO supper, the
state government for year
Oklahoma has a population o' T..
500. 600 human souls. II Is fair 10 pre-.
sumo that at least one ont of every
three OF our population rides on a
railroad train al least once each year.
II 100000 Oklahomans should each
travel goo miles each year on the
railroads Of the state. 81 would rcuro.
sent total mileage Of 100000 OVO
miles. The two.cout fare Law saves
the travelling public Cne cent on each
mile Travelled. so thai on this low cs.
innate q would show saving 90
81 900 )O0 I'M actual cash for one year.
Estimate the saving in your own
case for yourself Just remember
that every time YOU travel ten miles.
you have saved ten cents thanks 10
Oklahoma democracy. Every time you
travel a hundred miles. give the dem.
ocratic party credit for saving YOU one
dollar, and remember at the same
time that thanks to other rulings OF
democratic cooperation commission,
the cars are kept cleaner and The ser.
vice is better than It ever was under
republican territorial rule Remem.
be also, that thanks to an act passed
by the unanimous vote OF the demo
Gratis In the first state legislature.
there are separate coaches and wait
ns rooms provided for negroes on az
railroads within the state
That the democratic party In okla
homa deserves all the credit for this
saving cannot he denied. For cigh'
teen years the republican party had
control OF affairs in Oklahoma and
Indian Territory. With the exception
of single legislature they controlled
every session of the law making body
OF Oklahoma. During the entire
! eighteen years they had majority
/ in the national congress. which made
! all the laws for Indian Territory
| There was not year in all that time
hat the republican congress could
not have compelled the railroads oi
| Indian Territory TO carry passengers
for two cents per miles. There was
not session OF the republican legis
lature Of Oklahoma that could no
have given tho people of that terri
tory the same relief. The republican
party failed utterly to even attemp
such relief for eighteen years. Tn,
democratic party gave the people tn,
two-cent fare the minute The constitu
ton went into effect.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

The way the democrats OF Okla
homa have rallied to the support of
their governor when he was made the
object OF an unjust partisan assault
by the republican president has
brought CONSERVATION to the ranks OF
the Oklahoma republicans, Okla
noma democrats realize that the only
gindlcation possible to give Governor
Haskell Is to increase the democratic
majority in Oklahoma, and they are
determined 10 do II. II isn't often
that democrats get mad, but when
they do something is going to pop,
This Is one time that the democrats
Of Oklahoma are sp in arms in earn
est and the avalanche of votes that
will hit the republican-carpet-bag Nc
iuire Raymond Busby corporation
combination will be a lesson TO the
world in aggressive politics.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
SHERIff's Department

No matter will be received for this
column that does not bear the sigma
ture Of member of the Oklahoma
Sherifis Association.
The attention OF the sherifls and
others entitled to use this depart.
ment Of the Ardmoreite is called TO
the fact that no notice or communi.
cation calling for the arrest OF a
person or persons by name or de-
scription will be published unless
such notice or communication states
that the party whose name - signed
to the same holds n warrant for the
arrest against said Ierson or persons
charged No exception IN any in.
stance will be made to this rule.
Notices contained in this depart
ment are published grauitously. and
all persons interested are notified
that the publishers 40 not guarantee
the accuracy Of any statement IN
any such notice, nor that any reward
mentioned in any such notice lwil be
paid and will not be rosponsible for
any inaccuracy or mistake in any
such notice however occurring either
In printing. or otherwise, nor for
any failure or refusal to pay same.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

The republican papers have almost
dropped their personal fight on Gov.
ernor Haskell. Wonder If it's possi'
Bile that they have finally tumbled to
the fact that they were aiding the
democratic party so long as they kept
II up?
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

You take Kodol just FOR little
while when you have slight at
tacks OF Indigestion, ind YOU take
II just a little longer in order 10
get relief from severe attacks of
indigestion or nervous dyspepsia
Try Kodol today, Sold by W. b.
Frame.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Taft says the bank guaranty idea
is dangerous and impracticable That
isn't the first time Taft has opposed
something the people OF Oklahoma
approved Of. 1t Is recalled that less
than two years ago Taft said the Ok
lahoma constitution was a bad thing
He declared that It's adoption would
be dangerous. Oklahoma adopted II
despite his warning and has been
doing fairly well under it. Oklahoms
abs tried the bank deposit guaranty
'dea for eight months and IT suits her
oklahoma isn't very much impressed
With Mr.. Taft's judgment on Ques
.icns OF public policy.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Kodol Is combination OF the
natural digestive juices and 1t di-
eests all classes OF food and every
kind Of food. so you see it will do
the work that the stomach itself
does. Sold by w. B. Frame.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
a Card.

This is to certify that all drug
gists are authorized 20 refund your
money II Foleys Honey and Tar
fails TO cure your cough or cold
1t stops the cough, heals the lungs
and prevents serious results from
a cold. Cures la grippe cough and
prevents pneumonia and consump
tion. Contains no opiates. The gen
uine is in a yellow package. Re
fuse substitutes. For sale by all
druggists. d&w
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15
Order for Hearing Petition to Sell
Real Estate by Guardian.

State of Oklahoma, Carter county,
in County Court.
In the matter of the guardianship
OF Raford Bice, Jim Bice, Eliza Bice,
Rosa Bice, Albert Bice and George
Bicc. minors.
Now. this 2nJ day Of October,
1908, comes Logan Ross, as guar
dian of the estates OF the above
named wards, having filed herein
his petition FOR the sale of certain
real estate of said wards for the
reasons in said petition stated, and
it appearing that It would be benefi'
cial to said wards that such real
estate be sold
1T is ORDERED, That said petit
tion be and hereby is set for hear
ing on the 31st day of October,
1908, at 10 O'Clock a. M, at which
time the next of kin and all persons
interested in the estates of said
wards are required TO appear and
show cause. II any they have, why
an order should not be granted
for the sale of so much OF the reaj
estate of said wards as is necessary
for ther eason in said petition
stated. 1t IS further ordered that
copy Of this order be published
for three successive weeks in the
Daily Ardmoreite Of Ardmore, Okla
homa.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

csseaswset, the well known rene
dy for babies and children, will
quiet the little one in a short time.
The ingredients are printed on the
bottle. Contains no opiates. Sold by
w. B. Frame.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Whenever YOU have cough or
cold. Just remember that Foley's
Honey and Tar will cure n. Do
not risk your health by taking any
but theg enuinc. II is in a yellow
package. For sale by all druggists.
d&w
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

DO not let anyone tell you that
something else is just as good as
DeWitt's Kidney and Bladder Pills
because there isn't anything just as
good. Sold by w. B. Frame.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Re Il resolved by the City Council
Of the City Of Ardmore. OklahomL
That. pursuant TO n petition signed
by moro than ten citizens and prop.
e,y owners on II street northwe {, be-
ginning at Broadway and continuing
to Ninth avenue northwest In said
city. asking that sidewalks be pp,
in on said street. II is hereby order
ed that the said sidewalks are ces-
sary and that the property owners
on said street are hereby ordered 70
proceed TO put down concrete ide-
walks within ten days from this dat
and upon their failure TO do so with.
in said time the city council will ad.
vcrtise for bids and put said side
walks in and charge the same 10
the adjoining property owners.
Passed and approved. this. the 9Th
day of October. 1908.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Doctors and lawyers have at least
one good trait in common. They new.
er give advice before It Is asked for.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

Occasionally a listener hears good
Of himself-after talking into a pho
nograph.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

And many a man attributes his
failure to his inability to start at the
top.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

We feel sorry for some people be
cause Of the ancestors they inherit
ed.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

When something is the matter with
her complexion woman has too much
trouble to worry about her health.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1908-10-15

After getting the best OF a man in
one deal, steer clear of him, for he
will begin to sit up and take notice