The Harrison times. (Harrison, Boone Co., Ark) 1876-1938, 1908-05-30
0anderbone,s June Forecast.

Out III the seething mass and said:
Count p for Taft"
The Cannon men turned pale as ghosts,
And the Hughes men gasped for
breath
The men for Fairbanks eluug to posts
As colorless death.
Arkansas" the clerk exclaimed,
And the hall shook fore and aft
| When spray postmaster, white of hair
Hoped to the main deck of his chair,
And erred Eighteen for Taft"
| The Fairbanks men exuded groans,
| And the Cannon men shed tears
| And the Hughes men uttered none but
means
That once had uttered cheers.
california; doomed the clerk,
And the whole convention laughed
When a revenue collector rose
And whistled shrilly through his
nose,
Count 20 more for Taft"
The Hughes men looked at the Can
non men,
And they erawled out of their chairs
And Fairbanks fellows joined them
when
They pulled their Teddy Bears.
And they all rushed up the center stage
AS men who had made ready
And when the din and the tumult died,
And the dust had settled down inside,
The candidate was Teddy.
And when Bill Taft discovers what
a mean trick they have played him
he'll shed his coat and go to find the
man who betrayed him. He'll lum-
Der up the White House steps, with
each jump growing warmer, and Ted
will hear him coming in and slipinto
his armour, They'll spar around
the room a bit, and Ted will cry
"See here Bill know the whole af-
fair must look decentralization queer
Bill; but listen; You'll be named for
vice, and when we're both elected
why, I'll resign. You'll get it, Bill
fact is that suspected that Bryan
would defeat you, Bill, which made
it necessary for me to head the
ticket, Bill lest everything mis-
carry
And Bill will sink into a chair,
aware that he has messed it, and
will exclaim 81 see it now! BY love,
should have guessed it! o, most
ungrateiul wretch am |. to think
that you who made me-my bene-
factor and my triend-had shameless
ly betrayed mel"
Whereat they will embrace and hug
AS lovers reunited,
And Ted will rest on Williams breast
And softly say, Delighted"
June gets its name from Juno, the
Roman goddess of marriage. Juno
was supposed to see everybody
happily married. She was highly
qualified to do this, for she herself
had married Jupiter, who was a
worse runabout than Boni Gould.
When the celestial chorus was play
ing Parnassus, Jupiter hung around
the stage door like a Pittsburger.
He stirred IN more scandal than
Tom Platt, and was as bold as Gil
manaire Corey, Juno finally avenged
herself upon her rivals by turning
them into cows. which made Jupiter
cattle king.
The college graduate will hear
The Macedonian cry
OF Kansas farmers who must get
| The wheat cut by July,
They'll rustic out while yet the lark
Is chrruping his inatin,
And chase the binder round the field
Exudiug Greek and Latin.
The dinner bell will bring the sage,
the scholar and the cynic, and dinner
will become sort of scientific clinic.
Astronomers will talk of Mars, of
Saturn and Of Venus, and Latinists
recall few romances of Silenus
The Iunobug will be mentioned as
the genus Lachnosterna, and other
bugs will speak of land as being
terra hrma. They'll quarrel, shout
and sometimes swear in Arabic and
Greek, and now and then a dainty
hand will clasp a damask cheek
And all the while the farmer. full of
wondering and doubt, will deeply
marvel what the hotel Bill it's all
about.
The Anti-Saloon League willing,
the 21st will be the longest day of
the year Upon that date the sun
will reach the 1ropic OF Cancer in
the northeriy uN>-ruation. and will
start south again. g., 80 same
day the month will pass out o. lac
influence of Gemini the Twins, and
persons born aiter the 21st need not
be afraid. They will not have any.
Upon the contrary, the stork will
till only single orders under the zod-
iacal sign of Cancer the Crab Chill
dren born under this sign Will crawl
backward and cry for crabapple
Jelly.
The smiling heavens will inspire
The skylark and the linuet,
And the busy parsons will turn out
A new bride every minute
A few friends will throw shoes and
rice.
And taste the wedding cake,
And then make bets among themselves
On whether it will take.
Mr. Bryan will complete his wall
around Denver about the 30th, and
will set a deadfall at the gate Tor
Governor Johnson. In the course OF
the month, all Democrats who have
fought hst6ghts on the floor of Con
gress, or in any other way distin-
punished themselves, will be honor.