davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
All Broke IN.

From London Tit-Bis.
First Visitor-Most interesting country
round about here. Have you seen the
ruins2
Second Visitor (who had just paid his
bilD-Yes; I suppose you mean the guests
leaving this hotel
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
odd and Even.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger,
First Boy-Your father must be an aw-
ful mean man. Him d shoemaker and
maxim you wear them old boots.
Second boy-He's nothin' 20 what your
father is Him dentist and your baby
oulv got one TOOTH
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Traffic Through 500.

Freight moved through the Sault Ste
Marie canals this season was 5S,2lI21i net
tons, or 6,466, l3i net tons greater than in
l9G6. This was an increase of - per cent.
the greatest part having been contributed
by coal tonnage, iron ore, and wheat.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Not Eligible.

From the Philadelphia Prs.
Didn't that new nurse come that
engaged for little Mortimer" asked Mr..
De Style,
yes" replied Mrs. De Style, 'but she
wouldn't dc. She had nothing but blue
dresses to wear, and blue, you know. IS
only for girl babies; pink is for boys"
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Saw a Rare bargain.

From Success.
WHAT exclaimed the husband. you
drew your savings from the bank went
to @ brokers' office and bought T.. y. *
Y. stock at Il. when it has been dropping
like a T0Ck?"
But my dear" argued the wife, 1T
was such a bargain Why, during the
short time I was in the Office ! saw the
man mark it down TO Il from 45"'
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12

From the Brooklyn Life
Mrs. A.-Why do you have Dr. Howe
for your physician?
Mrs B.-Recause he has such a
jealous wife that no woman patient OF
his ever has an illness Of long dura-
tion.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
4 Resurrection.

From the Marine Journal
Steward, how long will it be before We
get into the haTbOT?'
About an hour and a half, ma am"
"Oh dear. 1 shall die before then"
Very likely. maa But youH be all
right again when you've been on shore
ten minutes"
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
A Great TaIker.

From Illustrated Bits
o'Toole-My, but he do love 20 hear
Himself. don't he?
OBrien-He do. Faith, If he had the
habit of talking i'm his sleep he'd set
up all night to listen 10 himself.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
A Demonstration of suhicieney

From the Chicago News.
Mother-Why Elsie. you don't mean to
tell me you took "a second piece of cake
at Mrs. Neighbors?
Little Elsie-Yes. mamma. I wanted to
show them that ! was used 10 having
enough TO eat at home
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
More Water,

From TiJ-Bi,s
And the name is TO be-" asked the
suave minister as he approached the
font with the precocioIs armful of fat
end fiOunCes.
Augustus Phillip Ferdinand Cod
rington Chesterfield Livingston SnOOks.
Dear me- Turning to the sexton: a
little more water. Mr. Hawkins, if you
please
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
EXPORTS AND sTRINGENCY.
Figures that show BaseieSsness Oi
the Financial Scare.
From the ST. Louis Republic.

From the ST. Louis Republic
In November, with the country under
going an unnecessary striugency the eX-
pCrts for the month had a value OF S214.-
O0jOQo. the largest on record In the ten
months, with an increase OF S1SOJ0,OI0 In al!
exported manufactures, exports of raw
cotton alone increased S65,0J5,090, with "a
total export of SI2.N0001 of c0tton-seed
oil for the ten months This is only one
item IN the officials figures for December
p What they ought 10 mean, with earn
ings from our other staple exports added,
is cash TO put down $50 miles of new
track for St Louis business IN 1905 for
every hundred IN the best year Of the
past, with the like increase in business
over the tracks. new and old.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Cause and Effect.

Mother-Why are you crying. Ted
die, dear?
Teddie-Cause brudder slapped me.
Mother-What did ne slap you for
Teddy-CTyin' n'-LippincOtts Maga-
zinc
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Risky.

IuTIII-
Mrs. Dashaway-Yes. while we were IN
Egypt we visited the pyramids. They
were literally covered with hieroglyphics
Mrs. Newrich-Ugh! Wasn't you afraid
some Of 'em would git on you?
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Evident from EgotIsm.

From La Rire.
The most extraordinary thing about
him is that he always attaches impOT-
tance to the most insignificant things"
Yes that is plain to be seen. If it
were not so, how else could he have such
an opinion of himself?"
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Knew Her FaiIings.

From Puck.
Judge, VIII you do me a favor?' asked
the lady who was about to go into the
witness box.
Certainly, miss; what Is it2'
"Will you please ask me my age before
I take the oath -
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Enjoyment In II.

From the New York Press.
"A fool and his money are soon parted.
my SON
Yes, but parting is such sweet sor-
row, pa.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12

From ScateTs
A clumsy waiter upset a cup of tea on
the shoulder Of a guest.
shall I bring you another napkin2"
asked the waiter.
Perhaps" said the guest, you had
better bring me a macintosh"
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Truthful james.

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger.
Benevolent Lady-But, my poor man. If
you have been looking for work ali these
years, why is it that you have never
found il?
Tramp (confdentially)-It's luck, mum
just sheer luck
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
would Take a Chance

From the Philadelphia LCdgaL
Not a cent" replied the rich man.
cOldly: money is not good for the poor
Well" responded the applicant. JUS
pretend that you have a grudge against
no
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
His Opinion.

What is your opinion of love at first
sight Mr Oldbach?' queried the girl
with the fluffy hair, who typewrites be
tween meals.
Love at any sight" growled Old
bach. is an optical illusion"
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Preparing for Emergencies.

From Puck
JeweleT-The inscription you wish en-
graved on the inside Of this ring I under
stand is "NIarcellus TO Irene"
Young Man with embarrassment
Yes, that's right. But-cT-don't cut the
Irene" deep.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12

From the Rural Retreat lvaI Times.
A B. Henderson sprained his ankle
very severely last Monday while running
from his store from the depot.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
An Oregon Saving Contest.

From the Fossil journal.
Miss Julia Chapman won a set OF silver
knives, forks. and spoons in board
saving contest given in Steiwer Han
Wednesday evening. She went through
her board before any of her competitors
had got well started
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Foolish Wise Men.

From the Portland Me- Express.
Low shoes and fancy socks continue TO
fH the hospital at Harvard with learned
NOung mon.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
Light Under the Stats

From che Dsys5rro ITsuuI DaiuEs.
The sunny smiles Of Miss AqUi.la Had
dix. OF Grassy. were seen in cur midst
Sunday.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12

From the Princeton Tiger.
The time-Any time.
Tie place-Any place.
The girl-Auy girl,
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
A Planter.

Frem the New York Press
Hewitt-My father was a planter
Jewett-Did he live in the South2
Hewitt-No, he was a Northern under
taker.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
SOME LITTLE LAUGHS.

No city is going TO be reckless enough
20 offer $lWeo or any part thereof, for
the convention of Tom Lawson's new par
ty.-DenveT Republican.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
nriminnI Grs Man-

From Illustrated bits.
Nixon Who invented gas meters?
Dixon-Judging from my gas bills,
should say Ananias.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
ENening ties.

The very hest a evening ties.
Though they've a hUmely marx.
are those that. keep a man at home
Each evening after dark.
The Washington herald., 1908-01-12
BIG FLEET Makes FIRST LEG
SWEET SIXTEEN" HAS COMPLETED ONE
FOURTH OF THE JOURNEY.

Continued from Preceding Page.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04

Helena. Ark, September 3.-(Special)- The Helena, Ark, State league club sprang a surprise on Birmingham today by blanking the Southern league team in a fast game, to 0. Both teams per formed well in the field. but the visitors were unable to locate Rogers delivery, the southpaw allowing but four hits and no runs. On the other hand, the locals found Fleharty and Bauer for a pair of tallies, enough to give them the game. With the exception of a bit of daring base running, which converted single into a two-base hit, the game was without sensational plays, although Downey and Schmidt performed in brilliant style. Henline singled to left field and surprised the natives by stretching 1t into a two bagger. His club mates were unable to help, however, and he perished.
 The State leaguers began early in the run-getting. Weber opened with a single and went to second on Herold's sacrifice. Benham then smashel out safety to left field and Weber raced home with the first run of the game. The other tally came in the sixth. The score:
 R.H.E. Helena. .. .. .. .. ... 100 001 00+-.2 , ? Birmingham. q. :. =. GOO 900 0O0-O I Batteries: Rogers and Harlow; Fle- harty, Bauer and Meek
 Umpire Gampher
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
LEPER MUST STAY
 IN QUARANTINE

Raleigh, N. C., September S.-Acting At torney General Heyden Clement today rendered an opinion that John R. Early of Lynn, N. C.. the leper now quaran- tined in the District of Columbia, could not be received by North Carolina, and that his wife, who is with him, must be quarantined indefinitely by the health board of Polk county in case she returns to her home at Lynn.
 The attorney general says there would be danger to people in the trip, whether by rail or through the country; that the disease became apparent In Washington, and that North Carolina is not called upon to care for citizens i'll in another state in the United States outside of this state; that there are no provisions for q case of this kind in the charity work of the state, and that as Early is a dis charged soldier of the United States, with the disease contracted while in Its on- ploy, it is the duty of the federal govern ment to care for him.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
JAPAN IS AGGRESSIVE.
China Complains of Encroachments In
 Corea.

Picking, September 3.--Contrary to her agreement to maintain the status quo pending a settlement of the Chentao boundary dispute with China, Japan has recently done a number of things in this territory which arouse the apprehension of the Picking government. She has oc- cupied the Residency buildings, recently completed at Yenchi-ting, in the disputed district she has brought into this town a joint civil and military commander and 1000 gendarmes and she is proceeding with the reorganization of the existing system of the government of the Corean popula- ton. China has protested to Tokyo and to the Japanese diplomatic representative here, but with no result whatever. The arrival of battery of Japanese field guns near the border has renewed the fears of China that Japan purposes to precipitate some action.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
@tIz7aIERIE1a3Aa537} 7I35tZi 5tZiZI.lla!lI1laiE+laluaJ
OYvilIe Wright Makes
 A Successful Fighf

Washington, September S.-Orville Wright made a flight in his aeroplane at Fort Myer. Va, this evening. While grounds Mir. Wright pulled the lever which controls the planes in the wrong direction, and he was compelled to de- scend in order to avoid running into some wires. The machine encircled the grounds once and was half way around the field when the mshap occurred. The aeroplane was in the air for one minute and 15 seconds.
 Orville Wright was at work all day preparing for today's flight. The start ing apparatus was thoroughly tested and shortly before 5 o'clock the aeroplane was wheeled across the drill grounds to the starting track. Over an hour was consumed in testing the motor and ar ranging details.
 Standing back from the aeroplane a. crowd of several hundred people, in cluding distinguished officers and scien- lists formed semi-circle. The gasoline did not feed properly when the motor was first started but the trouble soon was remedied and the motor was start ed for the second time.
 At 6:55 o'clock the aeroplane shot out along the single track and reaching the end continued to travel along the ground on its runners for about 20 feet when MT. Wright turned the forward planes upward and the machine gradually rose from the ground. MT. Wright directed 41.. of fia1l where a graceful turn was made for the return trip.
 Turning directly over the starting ap- paratus, MT. Wright continued on the second lap. Just as the machine started
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
WILL SAVE COMPANY.
PiIlsbury Mills Will Get Leave to Issue
 Certificates.

Minneapolis, Minn., September S.-The receivers of the Pillsbury-W Washburn Mill ing company declare that unless they are empowered to raise $750,000 immediately by means of an issue of certificates of indebtedness, the mills must close, which would result in loss of established busi- ness.
 They have addressed letters to the prin- cipal creditors of the company, asking their sanction to the plan, and 1t is said a large number of replies have been re- ceived favoring it.
 When a sufficient number of replies have been received, the circuit court will be applied to, to grant permission to is- sue the certificates of indebtedness.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04

to make the turn for the second return trip 1t was seen to dart down to the earth in front of the tent There was no one at that end of the field, and the crowd ran for the aeroplane, cheering wildly. The general impression was that MT. Wright had descended purposely directly in front of the tent where the aeroplane is housed
 It was found, though, that the forward part of the right hand runner had been broken off in two pieces. Mr. Wright was uninjured, and calmly told the crowd how the accident happened. He said:
 T pulled the lever the wrong way and the machine turned in the direction of those wires and that woodpile. l there fore had to bring the machine down to the earth rather suddenly. The mistake was due to the change we have made in the position of the operator on the ma chine, with which have not become thor oughly familiar. The damage could be repaired within few hours if we had the material here. If I had not made the mistake in turning l would have made several more circles around the field
 MT. Wright expressed his entire satis- faction with the machine, which was built for the signal corps of the army. Throughout the short flight the aeroplane made numerous undulations, coming very close to the ground at times, but never rising higher than 25 feet from the earth. MT. Wright said the undulating move ment was due to the fact that he paid little attention to the small planes in front, which control the ascent and de- scent of the machine. q was giving all my attention to making the curves he said.
 MT. Wright said he was a little nervous, because it was his first flight in the new machine. He said, however that the fu- ture flights would be easier. MT. Wright estimated today's speed at 38 miles an hour, covering a distance of about three quarters of mile.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
$1O,OOO REQUEST
 BY TONY PASTOR

$10,000 is left the Actors Fund of Amer ica by Tony Pastor, the so-called father of vaudeville in this country, whose will was filed in the surrogate's office to- day.
 Abe Hummel, the debarred lawyer who is now in Europe, and his sister, Bertha Hummell, are made executors. To both of them Mir Pastor made important be- quests, including a gold watch and a diamond medal to Mr. Hummell, present. ed to Pastor on anniversaries of his long theatrical career. There are numerous bequests to employees and personal frienos and MT. Pastors wife Is named as resid- uary legatee. The value of the estate is not disclosed, but 1t is said to be very large.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
NEW YORK GAINS
 IN LEADERSHIP Two Hard Games Are Won
 from Boston Team CUBS ALSO GAIN IN RACE Pittsburg Wins Only One Game and Drops Down In Percentage-Tue of War Comes Now In
 Eastern Cities.
NATIONAL LEAGUE STANDING.
Games Today. Chicago in Pittsburg. New York in Philadelph ia. Boston in Brooklyn.

Boston September 3.-New York re- peated it's feat of Tuesday by winning two games from Boston today. Both games were hard fought, but the time ly hitting of the visitors enabled them to win There were some spectacular plays made by each team, the New York men having four double plays to their credit in the first contest and Boston one. McGinnity pitch ed the first game for the visitors and his great work with men on bases was feature. In the second game New York found Dorner easy and he was taken out. Chappelle, who succeeded h i'm, pitched well and was taken out in the eighth to allow Bates to bat, when 1t looked as though Boston had a chance to tie the score Manager McGraw was put off the field for disputing with Umpire Klem. The scores:
 First game R. H. b. New York ...... 010 001 100-3 0 Boston ...... 900 GOO 000-0 : 1
 Batteries: McGinnity and Bresnahan; Lindaman, Ferguson and Graham. Time, 1:40.
 Second game RHE. New York ....... 112 001 oo3-S 0 Boston .00O 900 3o2-5 1
 Batteries: Ames, Mathewson, Taylor and Bresnahan Dorner, Chappelle, Ferguson and Smith. Time, 1850. Um- pires, Johnson and Klem.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
TENNIS EXPERTS
 NEARING FINALS

Cincinnati, September 3.-R. c. Seaver Boston; Dr. P. B. Hawk, Philadelphia, and R. A. Holden, Cincinnati, won their matches at the Tri-state tennis tourna- ment here today, and are now in the semi finals, with Nat Emerson of Cincinnati, the western champion. Seaver and Holden will meet tomorrow and Elmer son will have Hawk for his opponent The winner of the finals will meet Cham pion Robert Leroy. who arrived here to- day, in the challenge round on next Mon day.
 Miss Marjorie Dodd of Cincinnati de- feated Miss Adele Krause of Cincinnati, and will play the winner of the match be- tween Miss H. Mclaughlin and Miss Mar tha Knsey on Saturday for the ladies' championship, which is now held by Miss May Sutton, who defaults to the winner.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
NEW STOCK ISSUE.
Canadian Road Will Not Hurry In Put
 ting 1t Out.

Montreal, Que, September 3-Sir Thomas shaughnessey, president of the Canadian Pacific railway, said today that, while stockholders of the company will be asked at the annual meeting on October to give their consent to the issuing of $5o,- 100000 additional common stock, there IS no certainty that should such consent be granted, the stock will be issued in the immediate future.
 'In fact" said Sir Thomas. it can be safely said that no stock will be put on the market at once."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Railroad Postmaster Robbed.

Kharkov, Russia, September 3-A band of highwaymen today attacked and rob- bed railroad paymaster of the amount of the monthly payroll while he was proceeding from the bank to the railroad station. News of the hold-up was con- veyed to the authorities and police and officers were rushed to the scene. They opened fire on the robbers who began to retire, at the same time returning the fire Three men, including one of the robbers were killed. The others got away.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
PhysicIan Shot Dead.

Roanoke. Va, September 3.--A Bluefield special to the Times says: Dr. H. Howard Savers of North Fork, w. Va, was shot and killed today by w.. Wesley Wilkes on a train at Keystone station. There had been bad blood between the two men for some time, and it is said the physi- clan had threatened to kill Wilkes on sight. When they met at Keystone depot Savers attacked Wilkes, who then shot him. Wilkes was arrested.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Tiaers Win From Maps.

Detroit, September 3.-Mullin held Cleve- land shut out until the ninth inning. when a hit and two errors filled the bases with no one out. One run on Perrings sacri- flee fly resulted. Crawford. opening De- troit's half, hit for three bases and com pleted the circuit on Perring's wild throw to stop him from going the full route. Both pitchers did fine work in the pinches.
 Score: RH.E. Detroit. . .. .. .. ... .0OO 100 O01-2 13 2 Cleveland .. .. .. .. ..000 GOO O01-1 1
 Batteries: Mullin and Schmidt; Rhoades and Bemis. Time. 40. Empires, Egan and Sheridan.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Phillies Make Clean Sweep.

Philadelphia, September 3.-Philadel- phia made a clean sweep of the series of five games with Brooklyn by win ming today's double header. Brooklyn began a fine rally in the last inning of the opening game. The latter contest was featured by triple play, the first in more than a dozen years at Ma tional league game here. With men on first and second, Dooin drove liner to Pastorius, who caught the ball and threw to Alperman. who touch ed second, retiring Osborne. Alperman then shot the ball to Jordan at first retiring Doolin. Score:
 First game R. H. E. Brooklyn ......... .120 900 002-5 10 O Philadelphia 300 O01 12s-7 12 5
 Batteries: Holmes and Bergen; Foxen, McQillan and Dooin. Time, POO.
 Second game R. H. b Brooklyn 100 900 ooo-A1 6 3 Philadelphia .410 010 00s-6 10 ?
 Batteries: Pastorius and Bergen Richie and Dooin. Time. 1:32. Umpire. Emslie.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Iwo Warehouses Burned.

Columbia, Miss, September 3.-Two warehouses, the property of the Lamp ton company, and another owned by the Hill Hardware company, were destroyed by fire of an unknown origin today, caus- ing loss estimated at $75,0O0 partly COW cred by insurance.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
chess came Is Drawn.

Munich, September S.--The sixth game of the match between pr. Lasker and Dr. Tarrasch for the chess championship of the world, which was adjourned yes terday after 4S moves, was declared draw today at the 5Srd move.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Browns Reuain Position.

St. Louis, September 3.-By defeating Chicago today in the fourth game of the series, St. Louis regained second place in the pennant race. In the sixth inning r. Smith was batted out of the box. Score: R.H. E. St Louis .. .. .. .. GOO 1O3 OO+-4 10 1 Chicago .. . .. .. .O00 100 02O-3 4 2
 Batteries: Waddell and s. Smith; F. Smith, Manuel and Sullivan and Shaw. Time, AZ. Empires, O'Loughlin and Hurst.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Cubs Win Two Games.

Chicago. September 3-Both games were taken by the locals today. Over all blanked the visitors in the first, all lowing but three scattered singles. Pfeister would have duplicated the act in the second game had he not been d trifle wild in the sixth inning, two passes, a low throw by Steinfeldt and single, saving the white wash. Scores:
 First game R. H. E. Chicago ....... 900 0O1 04*--6 10 0 St. Louis ....... 900 900 000-0 3
 Batteries: Overall and Kling; Lush Beebe and Ludwig. Time, 1:25.
 Second game R. H. E. Chicago ......... .102 003 11%-8 12 2 St. Louis ........ 900 O02 000-2 Z
 Batteries: Pfeister and Kling; Ray mond. Gaiser and Moran. Time, 1:57. Umpire, Rigler
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
PERDUE WINS ONE
 GAME OUT OF TWO

Mobile, September 3.-Nashville and Mo- bile broke even on a double-header this afternoon, each team shutting out the other. Perdue pitched both games, and was stronger and better in the second than in the first contest. The visitors played great fielding games in both the games, while the locals performed miser- ably in the first part of the second game.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
AMERICAN ASSOCIATION

At Milwaukee: First game-Milwaukee ,, St. Paul 2.
 Second game-Milwaukee 10 St. Paul 5. At Toledo-Toledo 2, Louisville l. At Columbus Columbus 0, Indiana polls 2.
 At Kansas City-Kansas City 3, Min neapolis O.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-09-04
Champion Pauper Is Dead.

Utica, N. Y, September 3-The cham pion pauper is dead. after being a public charge for S5 years. Hezekiah Monk was born in the Herkimer county poorhouse S5 years ago, spent all his days there and died in that institution today.