Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-02-21

Church-Dld that detective you en-
gagged discover anything? Gotham
Yes; that l had money.-Yonkers
Statesman.
'EIe said had face like one of
Raphael's angels" oh well, the faces
of Raphael's angels were painted. you
know. It'll Bits
Willie--Pa, did you know ma long
before you were married? His Father
My son, i don't know her yet.-Wom-
ans Home Companion
He-The boys say I'm getting to be a
regular bear. She Indeed? 1t Say.
Sis, ask him whether he growls or hugs.
-Woman's Home Companion.
Every year the Higgs have Mrs.
Jones ", to their country home for a
long visit" Fond of her, are they"
"No-of him. '--Narper's Bazaar
Heard a fellow laen:ion me to-day
in connection with the presidency"
NO" Fact. Said no dub OF my type
would do louisville Courier Journal.
Young Lady (entering tobacconist's)
IL want to look Mt some cigars, please.
Suitable for a tall young man with
brown hair ALLY Sloper's Half-Holl-
day.
Bill-Do you find 1t hard to dodge
that bin collector now? Jill-Sure
harder than ever lie goes about In an
automobile, you know.-Yonkers States
man.
Dycut Funker--Rut | do not think |
deserve an absolute zero. Professor
Neither do l, but that is the lowest
mark am allowed to give. Harvard
Lampoon
Doc" said the man who was trying
TO get free prescription, whats the
best thing for a cold2" Competent
medical advice, my friend. louisville
Courier-Journal
wigg What errors these novelists
make! Here the author of this book
speaks of his heroine az being un-
manned Wagg Maybe she was di
vorced. Philadelphia Record.
Constable-Come along you've got to
have bath TrampA bath! What,
| with water2 Constable Yes. OF course.
Tramp--CouldI't you manage It with
one o. them vacuum cleaners New
| York Globe.
You should never take anything that
doesn't agree with you" the physician
told Mr. Marks. "If l had always fol-;
lowed that rule. Maria he remarked
to his wife, where would you be?''--
Boston Traveller
Benevolent Lady But, my poor man,
IL you have been looking for work all
these years, why is It that You have
never found It? Tramp (conhdential-
Wits luck, mum just sheer good
| luck. Boston Globe
you never change your mind about
anything, do your whats the use?"
rejoined the egotist. Il found years
ago that YVES just as liable To he
wrong the second time as | was the
FIRST y Washington Star.
Muriel-When you eloped with
| George, did you leave a note telling your
people where you had gone? Gabrielle
Why, Of course. III | hadn't, how
would papa have known where to send
| us any money illustrate Bits
Mrs subbs-If you1l shovel the snow
OF all the walks I'll give you something
to eat and some money besides. The
Hobo latter a survey OF the premises)
- Dnt looks good ter me, lady but
where am | ter sleep nights? PUCK
How did your husband get out Of
the building after he had located the
gas leakY' asked the reporter AS
nearly as he could remember II after
ward" said the woman, she went out
through the roof Chicago Tribune.
Mr.. subbubs DO you expect any Wis
itors tonight, my dear? Mrs Subbubs
Well. considering that Bridgets 20
Ing to leave, WilIle's got the measles,
the cellar Is flooded, and the grocer
hasn't called for two days-yes, | do
Ally Sloper's Half-iIollday.
"Some Of the greatest classical COM
pOsers did not make any money" said
the guest at the musical. Yes" an
swered Mr.. Cumrox, that thought is
about the only thing that gives me any
comfort when listen TO the things they
made up Washington Star
Crltic-Now that your play is to be
actually produced, you can surely give
me some idea as TO the plot and gen
eral action. Playwright Its still too
indefinite. You see, the call boy and
the man on the stage door haven't told
me yet what they want done to it.
Puck
Anna, dear, if | should attempt to
spell Cupid why should not get be-
yond the first syllableT Anna gave 1t
up, whereupon William said Because
when | come to g a. OF course | can
not 20 farther" Anna said she thought
that was the incest conundrum she had
ever heard.