Los Angeles herald., 1908-04-03
GanderbOne'S
April Forecast

"
And new and brighter augury
Will paint the east at dawn.
The songs of birds will fill the day,
And the night be full of frogs
And every time a cloud blows up
1t will rain cats and dogs.
And water nevis, and other brutes,
And also pollywogs
The brown thrush will return to sing
its song at even hush, and the kind
eyed COW will moult and rear new
and redder plush; the young mans
thoughts will love to dwell upon his
lady love, while he is not the one at all
that she is voting of.
The railroads. meanwhile, will retrieve
Their spirits and elate
Upon the Knockout blow the courts
Have dealt the 2-cent rate.
They'll all rebait their hooks again,
And drop them in the pool,
And when T. r. gets after them,
They'll all cry april fool"'
And then there will be doings in >the
presidential race, for everybody in II
will accelerate the pace. The hoofs of
Mr.. Johnson will put up a cloud of dirt,
and Mr. Bryan will put on a most ter
rife squirt. The presidential bee which
has been up in Bill Taft'S hat will be
removed by Roosevelt from that high
habitat; and when it seems the field be-
hind imperils Teddys bets, the bee will
be slipped in the seat of Williams
trouserettes.
Whereat the very earth will rock,
And sod and bits of loan
VIII obfuscate the sky each time
The sting is driven home;
And while to all the others once
They pass the grandstand twice.
Bills t. and B. will blandly ask,
Whom shall We run for vice?"
April was named for Venus, the Ro-
man goddess of spring. She was the
mother of Aeneas, and attended the
first Mothers congress with that young
man in her arms. She was a very fash
She was at different times the wife of
Vulcan, Mars. Mercury, Adonis and
Anchises, and held the matrimonial rec
ord until Lillian Russell. The planet
Venus was named for her as was the
city of Venice, Cal. She is also the
heroine of "Three weeks"
The baseball player will resume
With letters on his suit,
And the fan will sit out in the sun
And violently root.
His supper will grow cold and stale,
His wife will swear a bit.
And the cook will make a chalk mark on
The kitchen door and quit.
The straw hat season will come in,
and the oyster will go out; the last few
flocks of buckwheat cakes will sort of
hang about; the spring election will re-
fleet red fire against the sky, another
good share of the earth viii suddenly
go dry, and the congress will debate
upon relief laws for the losers, and lay
a reservation out for our unhappy
boozers.
The milliners will meanwhile show
Those gorgeOus Easter hats
With large soup lunches pinned to them,
And various ding bats;
And while the ladies dance for JOY
Before this line of goods,
Their lords will pack extra shirt
And light out for the woods.
The national convention of the Popu-
list party began at st. Louis yesterday
Wags have been asking why 1t was set
for so late in the month.
The moon will look like Bill Taft on
the 10th. The big leagues will soon be
under way. The American and Ma
tional will begin about the 18th, but
the Anti.Saloon league will get started
a week earlier. Easter will occur on
the 18th, and the goth will be devoted
to discussing what everyone had on
Persons who didn't have anything on
to speak of will, of course, be unmen-
tionable,
The sweet Elvira will to church
In rustling silks and tulles,
Which she will lift uD to her knees
In passing little pools;
And just because a few men look
No one commits sin,
For else il were not known her clothes
Are new clear TO the skin
After the 23d. April will be under the
influence of Taurus the Bull. Wau
street, which has for so long been under
the influence of Teddy the Bear VIII be
emancipated. Mr.. Hartman will give
a dinner at Which he will make public
the details of his plan to lock all
square deal fanatics up in roundhouses
Persons born under Taurus are bull
headed, and have double cowlicks
They are suspicious, and think the gas
meter is fast They are self willed
hut their wives can make them vote
dry. They are very intelligent and
understand railroad timetables.
The children viii take Easter eggs
And play upon the fcor,
And the baby will down one made green
With H2SO4
The doctor will come on the jump.
And lighting, sprain q leg,
And the whole household VIII weep ana pray
Till baby lays the egg
And then the buds of May will ope
their fair ana fragrant eyes, ana
promise of the coming June will glim-
mer in the skies the crickets and the
katydids in sweeter songs Will join
and the mint viii put I'm God We
Trust" upon our wicked coin.
Free, leorrote's Puzzle, Free
To introduce We will give away five
thousand of these Igorrote's Double Gross
puzzles, made OF Philippine mahogany
Difficult and fascinating. Write quicl
utu
cost Of mailing puzzle that's all.
Address Dominocards CO.,