The Washington herald., 1908-01-12

lDefEt remarked AilS baLuEitA Giilf
holding out newspaper. and pointing to
a two-column account of a fashionable
divorce, with a heading in pink ink. lis
another case of masculine blindness--of
husband who couldn't see his wife. Why
is it." she added, as the Mere Man bent
languidly to glance at the paper. that
the most fascinating women seem never
to be able to fascinate their husbands
that the women who have no trouble
whatever. before marriage. IN holding a
dozen men at their feet, always seem TO
have the most trouble after marriage in
holding one man theTe?'
Perhaps that's why" suggested the
Mere Man tentatively.
"What?"
They try to hold them at their feet
You can't hold a man by holding him
down" and the Mere Man took out his
pipe with the air Of having settled the
question.
No" reflected the Bachelor Girl sar-
eastieally, you can do It much better by
holding him-ofr."
"A woman" continued the Mere Man,
placidy ignoring the insinuaton, who
is used TO managing men, before mar
rlage, without any trouble. isn't inclined
to take any trouble after"
''Troublel" exclaimed the Bachelor
Girl pointing TO the pink paper at her
feet there was trouble enough there!
They flung plates and things. Mr. POT-
ter and she glanced up ehallengingly.
"Of course, agreed the Mere Man. nod
ding cheerfully.
And she had fainting spells and hys-
terics and went home 10 her mother
and"
Making trouble isn't taking trouble.
interrupted the Mere Man obstinately,
land the less trouble a woman takes.
the more she usually makes. A queen
Of hearts. before marriage. is feaTfully
liable to develop into a queen of tragedy
after marriage, and to treat her hus-
band to after-dinner comedies and before
breakfast melOdramas that would make
an audience sit up and stare. The man
who marries that kind OF a woman
doesn't have to go to the theater for
excitement and diversion; he gets it In
daily exhibitions right on the parlor car
pet or over the gas range or the coffee
urn. A Mckee Rankin melodrama isn't
In il with Tousing homemade melO-
drama of the wife and mother brand,
and the Mere Man shuddered and pulled
hard at his pipe.
But man never appreciates it"
sighed the Bachelor Girl, leaning her
curly head pensiveIy back against a red
SILK pillow
Appreciates it," The Mere Man took
his pipe out Of his mouth and stared at
her. He is never properly thankful" ex-
planned the Bachelor Girl. for having
married a real flesh and blood woman,
with nerves and temperament and sensi-
biIities He would much prefer china
doll with a face that never changes its
expression and hair and temper that
never gets rumpled or cut of curl Any
sort OF human emotions in a woman
either amuse or confuse man; but they
never move him"
They sometimes move him-out of the
house. interrupted the Mere Man cynic-
ally.
There is nothing sacred or beautiful to
him in a womans highest or deepest SEN
timents, declared the Bachelor Girl.
Not If she uses them for dramatic dis
play" agreed the Mere Man frankly
and serves them up with every meal
and warns them over at bedtime. a
chap, I fancy, gets used to them after a
while; and they become merely a disa-
greeable part of the domestic regime, [
ike the plunking in the steam pipes or /
the rattle OF the china in the kitchen /
or the buZZing OF the electric bells. Why /
is it,. he added thOUghtfully, that 50 |
many women fancy that they are fasci- /
mating only when they are acting and 4
that, to hold husbands interest, they |
must treat him TO a vaudeville show of /
emotions from the wedding day to the |
grave? Why do they Tevel in scenes !
and rows and situations and things? /
4 man mates q 'TumpUs' as a cat hates q /
shower bath; and he'll run from a wOm- |
an who deluges him with her emotions /
just as a cat viii run from the person 1
who drops a dinner plate on its head. /
A woman can't get devotion or anything /
else out of husband by fighting for it" /
NO agreed the Bachelor Girl spirit /
ediy. but a china doll with patent /
smile and a mechanical heart can get /
anything on earth she wants out Of him. /
just by sitting up and speaking for it, !
Ike pet dog or trained monkey"
well" protested the Mere Man. shift |
ting nervOusly in his chair, shes so /
comfortable. She doesn't run home to 1
mamma, nor lock you out, nor make /
fuss over YOU"
'Of course not" aSsented the Bachelor |
Girl scornfully And a man, like a cat, /
detests being made fuss over. He likes |
TO be loved and admired at a distance +
and prayed to and burned incense be-
fore, like a Chinese Joss. You may
PROSTATE yourself at his feet-but don't /
get on them," and she gave the red silk /
pillow a spiteful little punch behind her
head.
And 3nn't try to keep him under
yours" ADDED uNe Mere Man. warningIy |
AT least don't try to do it by weeping
and fainting and running home to moth
er. You may sob him into apparent re-
gEat. bat you can't sob him into true
repentance, You may make him run from
a whizzing plate or a broomhandle. but
you can't make him run in the right d.
rection."
And you may faint" rejoined the
Bachelor Girl. bitterly. until you are
blue in the face, without ever stirring
his soul beyond the point of fetching
you a glass of water and the brOmo self
zer. The masculine soul has a strip of
wood in 1t somewhere that nothing can
pierce. Instead of being touched or dis
tracted by the sight of a wife in a lit
of nerves or hysteria, he sits off ano
looks at her as he would at a play that
bored him. His one emotion is a pas
senate wonder as to when it Will all
be over. And when it is over. he merely
byeathes sigh of relief and Immediately
proceeds to step on her dignity or her
Eensibilities again and"
But he can't help it!' interrupted the