davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
RESTAURANT TIPS.
The Much Vexed Question From the
Waters Point of View.

The Much Vexed Question From the
Waters Point of View.
81 know by the way you nod your
head you think it's pretty hard on the
public. Suppose every waiter here got
a regular salary, with no chance for
extras. Do you suppose he'd be jump
ing hurdles for lot of fussy people,
all kicking about better things than
they get at home? Do you think he'd
present the glad smile to those he'd
like to choke, break his neck making
everybody comfortable and then listen
to their hard luck stories or more pain
full jokes? No, sir; he'd serve the stun
Just as he got it from the kitchen He
wouldn't go back and fight for ddbits
and extra hot food. He'd be in no
hurry to serve any one and pile up
work for himself. The customer would
wait because the waiter wouldn't and
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
Homo Life of Genius.

The Actor before reakfast)-Where
are the papers, my dear? His Wife
ian actress, absentmindedly)-C
you! They are far beyond your reach,
thank heaven! And I'll die thousand
deaths before you can wr-r-r-r-ring the
secret om-oh-er-Jack, 1 mean, the
boy forgot to leave them this morning!
Puck
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
The Penalty of Prominence.

Dorothy's father is a militia colone.
and on a recent occasion she saw him
In brave array. at the head of his regl
ment
"How do you like your father in his
uniform?" the colonel asked his small
daughter that night
"You looked handsomer than any
body else" said Dorothy Loyalty, land
you held your head up so hight But
1 think they were mean not to let you
have a drum to play onr'-Youth's
Companion.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
The Martial Shirt

when you go into battle" said the
human analyst, do you feel your heart
surge with hostility toward the foe or
anything like thatY
Eyes" answered the military ex-
pert. "In time of war we feel even
more resentful toward the foe than
we feel toward our rival associates in
time of peace. Washington Star
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
A Reason.

"Pa," asked Mr. Henpeck's little boy
''why did Patrick Henry say, Give me
liberty or give me deathY"
''He may have been out five minutes
after the curfew rang the night be-
ore."-Chicago Record-Herald.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25
The Hinhest AnnIause.

You would compliment a coxcomb
doing a good act, but you would not
praise an angel. The silence that ac-
cepts merit as the most natural thing
in the world is the highest applause
Emerson
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25

An English hostess was entertaining
about 300 people at a reception and
had provided only about seventy five
seats. In despair she said to COM
patriot: ''Oh. | am so distressed! Not
three-fourths of these people can sit
DOWN.
"Bless my soul. madam he ex-
claimed whats the matter with
them?'
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25

Make note now to get Ely's Cream
Balm if you are troubled with nasal Ca
tarrh, hay fever or cold in the head. 1t
is purifying and soothing to the sensitive
membrane that lines the air-passages It
is made to overcome the disease, not to
fool the patient by a short, deceptive re-
lief. There is no cocaine nor mercury In
it. Do not be talked into taking a sub
stitute for Ely's Cream Balm. All drug
gists sell it. Price SOC. Mailed by Ely
Bros, Sc Warren Street, New York.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25

STUDY IN DIMENSIONS.
"Jimmy, how large piece of cake
do you want?"
II want big piece, but don't gimme
SO much that I'll have to divide it
with sister,"
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1908-02-25

To stop that pain in the back, that stiff
ness of the joints and muscles, take Pine
ules. They are guaranteed. Don't suffer
from rheumatism, backache, kidney trou-
Bile, when you get 80 days, treatment, for
$1.0O. A single dose at bed time proves
their merit. Get them to-day. Sold by
II. B. Allen, Mount Holly F. s. Hillard,
Vincentown.