The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1908-04-15
HERE AND THERE


The New York man who went in.
sane because he had too much money
left him will have many sympathizers.
Who would like to have the estatep
1t may seem unkind to say so, but
Mrs, Yerkes seems to make a good
deal more fuss over losing her bull pup
than she did over the loss OF her sec
ond husband.
1t looks as II San Francisco must
have recovered from the earthquake
and fire as the Cinnamon are spending
half a million dollars on a new theatre.
When you ask Georgia man how
far it is to the next plantation, he ans
wers that it Is a peek and right smart
screech. He is supposed to mean
that it is as far as you can see from
where you stand and then as much far
Their as a strong voice can be heard
1t Is queer that even an uprigh
piano is capable OF producing down.
right bad music
Six hits minute is the reported
record OF Evans fleet at Magdalena Bay
General Fred Grant says that the
army of the United States can sue
cessfully withstand any attack by for
eign power. The regular mobile
troops aided by the 10000 state mil
itia are thoroughly capable of handling
any enemy.
Henry Harrison, of Seattle, Wash
ington, has had removed from the in
nermost recesses of his system eleven
knife blades, five lath nails, six small
screws, three tacks, and sundry other
bits of hardware. He has made his
living on vaudeville circuits swallowing
| glass knife blades and other articles
He is SO years old and has been fol.
lowing his vocation for 20 years.
There are AZ statues in New York
City Statues of soldiers come first
statesmen next, then comes literature,
phllanthropists, inventors, explorers,
composers, sculptors, architects, one of
a physician and one of clergyman.
The Pennsylvania girl who lost her
toes in fight against corns may have
had nerve but she was not a heroine.
| Tall aches from little toe-corns grow
and sometimes large e,.nerals follow
Let us get rid of the corns.
Uncle Sam as grape grower has
set apart 70 acres of land near VinelanG
on which to make experiments.
Admiral Evans who has had hi.
share Of fighting and more than hi,
portion of wounds considers a mud
bath good deal nearer an unmention-
able place than he has ever been be
fore but admits that his rheumatism
has been benefited
| A club in Albany, New York, has
been organized 10 discover whether or
not the earth is hollow. This will re-
quire SO much digging that it ought to
open a fine field of operation for the
unemployed.
A New England reiormer proposes
that hereafter railway passengers be
charged for by the pound and not by
the head.
Woman suffrage in Utah has sue
cecded completely. Two ladies rob
bed a Salt Lake jewelcr of 10000 worll
of diamonds and vamoosed. I'll,
question arises, care They Mormons?'
A minister during his discourse ON
Sabbath morning said an each blad,
Of grass there is a Sermon The fol
+ lowing day one OF his flock saw III,
good man pushing the lawn mower h
paused and said DWELL parson In
glad to see you engaged in cut,in
your sermons short"
With the farmers putting up tn
price Of beef and mutton to unhcar
Of figures, it does not look as if the
were suffering from financial depres
, sion.
Every ship in Evans fleet has beat
and all worlds records have been CT
down. That seems worth the Who'll
of the expense Of sending the fleet t
the Pacific.
: The mayor OF Milwaukee who wa
not reelected has purchased balloo
and will try the higher aspects OF III
, with vengeance.
n Two men are dead and another sc
8 iously sick at Decatur, Michigan, NJ
e license town, from drinking bay run
The Pacific fleet ought to demon
strate that Uncle Sam can paddle HI
own canoe.
~ just do this to keep my hand in
: remarked the man as he pulled on h
t gloves.
The first time girl is disappointe
: in love, she is very much surprised
j. find that her h cart isn't broken.
d Commodore Vanderbilt used to S
u on the porch of Congress Hall, Sar