The Washington herald., 1908-07-30

Yesterday was his day The man with
the blue coat and nickel buttons wen;
from house 70. house leaving everywhere
an oblong slip Of paper Of the color Of q
burned Brazilian top5z. The paper was
the gas bill. and look at it as long and
often as he could. the recipient OF this
note Of hand either complained about the
size OF the bill or put it aside with a
groan- He never made an effort 10 FIG
ure out" the gas meter. The puzzle is toe
profound. the mystery too deep. So the
bill is paid al the expiration Of the ten
days which is graciously allowed for set
tlement II this is overlooked, another
man with a blue coat viii pay a visit 10
the DELINQUENT. In one hand this man
carries a monkey wrench, while in the
other he holds q deep pink notice from
the hot air company that the meter VIII
be taken out unless the bul be paid at
once.
Mark Twain made his observation on
the gas meter. having had his own ex-
perience with blue-coated, monkey-wrench
bill collectors and gas meters. Mr. Twain
called the gas meter "a picturesque.
variegated and industrious nar."
Wide Difference of Opinion.
Mark Twain having made this festive
declaration the average householder be
heves that whenever his gas bill in
creases the meter in his cellar has been
racing" and that It has recorded two
feet. more or less, for each foot actually
passed. The gas companies. on the other
hand. maintain that the average domestic
meter IS slow and that in every in
stance the amount used is actually. con-
siderably more than is measured, They
further claim that for a fiow OF gas under
a certain amount the meter will not re-
cord at all. which enables the consumer
20 burn gas all night II he turns the
light low enough, without any record be-
ing made The truth. according 10 gas
experts. lies somewhere midway between
these extremes
But This l. Easy to Believe.
No meter was ever made which was IN
errant OF infslibIe; very few have been
made or put into use within recent years
which are not sufficiently accurate for all
practical purposes Tests extending over
many years establish the fact that about
as many meters are fast as slow, and
that the percentage of error is very little
either way. while the mechanism is in
good working order Il has also estab-
lished the fact that deterioration IS
steadily in favor OF the companies in in
creasing the apparent consumption. Con
seGUently. Il IS no. 20 the interest Of a
gas company &c have meters proved or
tested unless the evidence OF their dials.
checked Up by the law OF probabilities
and the experience Of averages. shows
that they must be running slow
Perhaps the infreQuency with which this
happens il practice accounts FOR the fact
that systematic economy is so rarely re-
fected in the gas bills. and that some
times when no gas is used the charge is
The same as when q great deal is used. CT
i may be even more
The most novel method OF reducing
gas bills I have ever head Of was ex-
planned 70 ne by a. IndiaLe nan on an
east-bound Pennsylvania train the other
night" said c. A Walker, Of Chicago, at
the Raleigh last night
He Gave the Thing a Bath.
The experiment was made by a Ger
man mechanic IN one OF the larger Hoo
sier cities" continued Mr.. Walker Like
many other househoI6ers. the German be
came weary Of the constantly increasing
bills that made their appearance monthly,
and being Of an investigating turn Of
mind. he determined 70 examine the inner
structure Of the gas meter Turning Of
the supply from the street main, he pro-
ceeded 10 disconnect the meter. and then
to open the Oblong box he carefully
examined the intricate works that regu-
late the indicator mechanism and thought
a while An idea struck him He took
the meter 10 d sink, and with the aid Of
a funnel filed the apparatus with water
and left Il in this condition u5.sss he re-
turned for supper
The first object that encountered his
gaze was that water-Iogged meter Need
ing its services for The evening. he emp
tied the water. and connected It up in its
former position Il performed its func-
tions properly enough, and tie incident
for the tine was forgotten.
Bills Began to Shrink.
AT the beginning Of the fyllowing
month when the gas bill re- its ap-
pearance II was found TO i.runk
from the customary 50 and 81 10 a little
more than 81 The following month this
amount had dwindled to $3.50. Then came
a visit from an Inspector, who. after
minute examination and many inquiries.
removed the meter and replaced II with
another. The German economist decided
that the new apparatus needed a bath.
and he at once carried out his resolution.
The same results follOwed-gas bills re-
duced from One-half TO twO-thirds their
former proportions Another visit from
the inspector, and another change OF
meters The result was that all further
efforts 10 restore the cOmpany's normal
income from that source were abandoned
You ask me what caused the meter
10 be derelict IN its duties2 I suppose
the bathing process caused the delicate
operating the dial 10 become
somewhat clogged with rust, and while
failing TO register the correct amount OF
gas flowing through the box, Il in no
manner diminished the quantity or quail
ity
Did the German genius apply for
patent on his discovery
We'll. you might satisfy yourself on
that point by looking up the records IN
the Patent Once"
Selected as official Route.