davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
LONDON PLANS Big PAGEANT
Masters of All Arts to Aid in His,
toric Review.
scenes OF EngIand's Past Achieve
Water Next July.

London. Jan. 4-The pageant that is TO
be given In London next July will sur
pass all previous enterprises Of the kind
elsewhere, as it will practically be a
spectacular review of the history of Eng
land.
All the official bodies of London are
supporting the scheme and the most
prominent artists, designers, actors, mu-
sicians. historians, and professors in the
United Kingdom are helping. II is hoped
that # may be held in Regents Park,
which might entail a special act of Par
lament
Here there is a spacious arena of twelve
acres. with a large sheet of water
which would accommodate lOO00 actors
and actresses, and tiers Of covered seats
for l2,OW spectators.
Frank Lascelle, the organizer of the
Oxford pageant. viii manage it. He re-
ceived yesterday offers from 500 vOlun-
teers 10 take part, ranging from profess
sOrs to parlor maids. Some idea of the
scope of the pageant may be conceived
from the following list Of scenes that
have already been planned.
The first shows the mythical King Lud,
who is supposed 10 be buried in Ludgate,
on guard over the city; a scene Of cave
jewellers, of the bronze age a water
scene, including a Pagan sacrifice; a
Christian ceremonial showing the conse-
Grafton of Melitus, the first Bishop OF
London, A d. 500; coronation Of William
the Conqueror, a gorgeous scene; Rich
ard / returning from the Crusades; Rich
ard II quelling the rioters headed by Wat
Tyler. coronation procession Of Anne
Boleyn, this on water, the galleys having
gold for the sails; Queen Elizabeth and
the return Of Sir Francis Drake; Charles
Is last journey to Whitehall; return of
Charles II; an eighteenth century picture.
in which the arena will be covered with
people in powdered wigs. representing
the most prominent personages OF the
Georgian period.
The last scene will be a reproduction of
some event in 1890
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
Mexican Cities Advancing RapidIv,

Mexican cities have required aid from
the federal government in beginning
their municipal improvements. says w.
D. Hernaday, in the current number of
Municipal Engineering, and he shows
how more than S45. goo. 600 has been do
mated by the nation in aid of sanitation
and water supply systems now in prog
ress Of construction In Mexico City. Sa-
iina Cruz, Vera Cruz, Manzanillo. Maza-
tlan, and others The capital has natur-
ally required the most money. nearly
two-thirds If the total half of which
was necessary in solving the difficult
drainage problem OF the city, and vicin-
ity. But Vera Cruz has had appropria-
tons of $4,000, 600 for its water works.
in addition 20 arOther $4,000. coo fur
nished by the city itself. and Manzanillo
with It's pert, viii ultimately cost the
government 50 600. 600
Tampico has spent over $4,000. 600 on
its sewer and water works system. in
addition TO 100000 received from the
government.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
HIS ENGLISH TOO ENGLISH.
How the Dropping of His HIS Caused
Complication.

Unless the Atlantic Transport Line
and certain prominent New Yorker
can effect a compromise. the courts will
be called upon to decide this weigthty
question; Has an Englishman the right
to talk cockney in making a bargain
here in America?
The owner OF one of the well-known
newspapers in this city sent his private
secretary to seizure passage tickets for
himself and his wife on one Of the out
going steamers OF the Atlantic Trans
port Line. This secretary is an impor-
tation from London and talks h-ess Eng
fish, says the New York Times.
Said the secretary to the booking clerk
Put air mattresses in the berths, and
send the bin to Mr.. ---"
so two pneumatic mattresses were pur-
chased at a cost of 500. and letter sent
to Mr. --, notifying him that the two
air mattresses have been purchased as
per directions Of your secretary" And
tn bin for 800 was inclosed.
The next mail brought a reply
Air mattresses so the letter ran in
effect. Who the devil wants air mat
tresses? My secretary told you that
wanted hair mattresses. When you Sc
cure these and forward me the bin,
will send my check in payment
The agent OF the Atlantic Transport
Line took the letter to the booking clerk.
How about this? MT X. says that he
wants hair mattresses.
why. I'm positive that his secretary
said air mattresses. replied the book
ing clerk. Here's the memorandum that
made at the time. +"
And at that moment the secretary en-
tered
Il don't see 'ow you made that mis-
take, said he. Il never mentioned air
mattresses. / said Mr.. Y wants air
mattresses. And when you send the bill
TO i'm for air mattresses e will pay it
apply"
And then the agent saw light
'Oh, now / see how the mistake oc-
Cured. said he to the secretary. You
must pardon ME for being personal. but
you Englishmen occasionally forget your
his unconsciously; in ordering these mat
tresses you undoubtedly meant to say
hair but in reality said air"
NO, ST." replied the secretary. y
said air and nothing else"
Then the agent gave up the Job Of ex-
planning 20 the secretary as a hopeless
one. He wrote a letter of explanation
20 Mr.
But Mr.. -- replied that the booking
clerk ought to have known that a man
who says e for he and i'm for him meant
air for hair. The agent, on the other
hand, asserts that il is no part Of his or
Of his clerks business 10 inject his into
the language of their customers.
And there the question stands, awaiting
a Solomon.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
UNEQUAL GROWTH OF CITIES.
Pennsylvania Only state with Two
Having Half Million.

From the Philadelphia Press.
The next census will show that Penn
sylvania has two cities each with a popu-
lation exceeding 500.OOO a distinction
which no other State in the Union will
possess.
No doubt Buffalo will eventually reach
100000 population, and great deal more
Location anywhere on the chain OF the
Great Lakes seems 10 be very favorable
TO municipal growth. But we see no signs
of Illinois ever possessing a second first
class city.
Chicago absorbs all the municipal
grows the state can afford Peoria its
second city. was, in 1860. with its popu-
lation of $4,000 less than one-thirtieth the
size of Chicago. We are reminded that
Massachusetts had in 1900 ten cities each
exceeding 50.OOO "a distinction Pennsy-
lvania cannot claim"
1t is true Pennsylvania had in 1900 only
eight cities with a population exceeding
$4,000. and in this particular il outranked
every other city in the Union except
Massachusetts
In 1900 only three States had a city with
population over 1,0OOoOO. Six States
could claim a city with population over
100000. Eight States had a city or two
with over 100000 population and fifteen
States had one or more cities with popu-
latiOn exceeding 100000.
Cities of 100000 population are divided
among twenty States. while thirty-three
States have one or more cities with a
population exceeding $4,000. There are a
few States so truly rural that in 1900 they
had not a Single city or town with pop
ulation Of 5000
These are Idaho. Mississippi. Nevada,
North Carolina. North Dakota. South
Dakota, Vermont and Wyoming. The
equality Of the sovereign States is in
nothing so completely overruled as in the
unequal growth OF the municipalities
within the Union.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05

Falkland Islands industries are limited
In number, but possibly in no other part
of the world are capital and labor better
rewarded Sheep raising and ship re-
pairing are the central activities through
which invested capital and labor receive
due reward There are thirty sheep
ranches on the 5000 square miles of terri
tory embraced in the Falklands. Ac-
cording TO the latest report of the gov
eminent inspector there are on the ISL
ands 7O2,696 head Of sheep. The WOOL
product of 1896, the latest available re-
port, amounted to 4,224215 pounds. The
value Of the wool was approximately
S726.122. Wool does not represent the
full value of the product of the sheep
ranches. Tallow. peits. hides. &c, were
exported to the value Of SS2,262.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
The Retort scnthinr.

One day Lord Roberts found himself the
center of a circle OF new friends in a Lon
don club. There was a very tail gentle
man present, who evidently believing
himself to shine as a wit, seized every OPP
portunity of raising a laugh al other peo-
pies expense.
On being introduced tn Lord Roberts the
wit bent down patronizingly 10 his lord
ship and remarked
II have often heard Of you, but'-shad-
ing his eyes with one hand as though the
famous general, being so small. could be
seen only with difficulty-'I have never
seen you.
To which Lord Roberts promptly re-
Piled. Il have often seen you, sir, but
have never heard Of you M. A. p.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05

Here are some amusing statistics given
by a well-known German actor az the
close Of pamphlet containing an account
of his life:
I have played 455 different parts in 81
plays in IS towns on 1883 occasions.
/ have been married 1,72l times.
Have died 1920 times.
Been stabbed TO death 81 times.
Shot 81 times,
Drowned % times
Poisoned 165 times
dubbed to death IS times
Beheaded 81 times
Assassinated 100 times.
Hanged 81 times,
Committed suicide 3i4 times,
Died a natural death 50 times.-M. A. P.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
Definite Article Overworked.

When Emperor William was IN Eng
land the newspapers referred to him as
the" Emperor William. A reader asked
one editor why. This is the editor
answer:
It is queer thing, certainly-not less
so when we remember that the Germans
do not use the article in speaking OF
Kaiser Wilhelm There IS, perhaps, a
tendency in our speech to drop the ar
ticle in the case of titles made familiar
by long use, such as king and lord. -
Lord Kitchener. for example, is officially
described in gazettes and places where
they are precise as the Lord Kitchener
Of KhaTtOum." In our own public life,
OF course, we have had little to do with
the title OF emperor since Henry VIII
aspired 10 the crown Of ChaTlemagne.
and the formal the has not dropped
away from IT,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
SHOULDER OFTEN DISLOCATED.
For the FOrty-Iirst Time flanagan
Calls the Doctor.

Its ont again, Doc" was the complaint
of William flanagan 10 Or. Meyer, Of the
dispensary staff.
The mans shoulder was dislocated and
the physician placed him under the infiu-
ence of an anesthetic and twisted the in
jured member back in place. SAYS the
Indianapolis News. II was the forty-frst
time that flanagan had his shoulder
set" Last Tuesday he entered the dis
pensary. 1t was the fortieth time the
accident had happened TO him and he
told the physician that it was an even
forty"
Il have set Hanagans shoulder twelve
or fifteen times" DIR. Meyer said Every
few days he comes into the dispensary.
and the same work is done each time. BE.
cause OF his work as a cabinet worker the
injured arm must be left free 10 move.
To-day flanagan apparently was all
right when he reached behind him for
tool. The motion caused his shoulder TO
slip out of place. and as usual the man
stopped his work and came here. He
keeps count, and he has had the injury
repaired forty-one times"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
Ii Was a Pity.

From VI. A. i.
The Rev. c. Fl. Grundy tells the follow
ing story:
The chaplain of large private asylum
asked brother clergyman TO preach 10
the inmates on sunday during his alb
sencs. Before going away he said:
Preach your best. for, though insane
on some points, they are very intelligent. 3"
So he talked. TO them Of India, and of
heather mothers who threw their dear
little babies into the sacred river Gauges
as offerings to their false gods.
Tears streamed down the face Of one
listener, evidently deeply affected. When
asked by the preacher afterward what
part Of the sermon had touched his heart
with grief, the lunatic replied
Il was thinking II was a pity your
mother didn't throw you into the
Ganges."
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
NUNS BAR POLICE.
Sisters of TraDPist Order Object to
Their Convent Being Searched.

Ihetr convent Being Searched.
Paris, Jan. A magistrate OF Macon,
whose daughter recently disappeared. was
yesterday informed that she was detained
in a Trappist convent in the suburbs OF
the town.
Accompanied by police magistrate and
three detectives, he went 10 the convent,
but was refused admission The police
magistrate displayed his tFic0lor scarf,
and demanded in vain in the name of
the law that the door should be opened.
Eventually the police scaled wall and
broke into the building
Fifty nuns. with covered faces. barred
their way and refused to speak The
magistrate declared that If they did not
show their faces force would be used.
The nuns then removed their hoods but
declined to make any statement about
the missing girl or anything else.
The police searched every part of the
convent without result They have now
discovered that the girl had been sent TO
another convent near Geneva
The members Of the Trappist order are
under vows to maintain perpetual silence
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
IN MEMORIAlI.

4 shadow slept folded in vestments,
The dream Of a smile its face
Dim. soft the CLEAN after sunset
That hangs like halo Of grace
Where daylight hath died IN the valley
Aud twilight hath taken It's place
A shadow b,it still on the mortal
There rested the tremuloEs trace
OF the Joy Of a spirit immortal
Passed up to its God in His grace.
A shadow Hast seen in the summer
A cloud wear the smile OF the sun.
On the shadow Of death there is flashing
The glory Of noble deeds done:
On the face Of the dead there is glowing
The light Of a holy race HIn;
And the smile Of the face is rejecting
The CLEAN Of the crown he has won
Still shadow Sleep on ia the vestmeuts
Unstained by the priest who has gone.
Yea. soTTOw weeTs over the shadow,
But faith looks aeft to the skies:
And hope, Ike rainbow. is flashing
Der the tears that rain down from their ewes
They muImur on earth DE prOfundis"
The low chant is mingled with signs:
'Laudate" rings cut through the heavens
The dead priest hsth won his faiths prize.
His children in s0TTOw viii honor
His grave every tear is a grm,
And their prayers round his brow in the heavens
VIII brighten his fair diaden.
! kneel at his grave and remember.
In love. am still one Of them.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
TRIBUTE TO AN OLD NEGRO
Robert Shropshire Always Attended
the Confederate Reunions.
Wore the Gray Uniform, and Was
Entitled 10 state Pension, bur
Never Got II.

Robert Shropshire. the "old Confederate
negro. so well known about the city, who
has attended d number of the Confederate
reunions. and always wore the gray uni
form, is no more. He died at the Lafon
Home yesterday afternoon, after having
been feeble for some time According 10
his request. he will be buried in his uni
form OF Confederate gray. with the con-
quered banner wound around him, says
the New Orleans Picayune.
Shropshire was treated with genuine re-
gard by a large number of people who
knew that he was a real Confederate SOL
disr, and was wounded while in the serv-
Ice Of the South. He was quite an inteIli-
gent old fellow, too. and a colored man OF
high personal integrity and reliability.
He was born In Nashville and was oven
seyenty-four years old when he died. He
became "a member of Company A. Fifth
Texas Cavalry, and was regularly sworn
in, served as a teamster, and paid month
IS. He belonged TO Maj. John Shropshire.
who was killed al the battle Of Glorietta.
near the Texas line, and afterward 10
Mrs. Robert Shropshire. who was stlll liv-
ing last year. and who gave him a high
recommendation. He served with Gen
Shropshire, a brother Of his former mas
ter, and later went 10 Holly Springs. Miss.
where he was wounded on the head by a
piece OF a she'll. After the war he worked
on steamboats,, and afterward went TO
Columbus Tex, 10 live with Mrs Robert
Shropshire. He was probably the only ne
gro entitled 10 a pension from the State.
but did not get it, although an effort had
been made TO secure one for him. and
some OF the Confederate organizations ap-
pr0priated money monthly for him
H the parades at the various reunions
Shropshire was always a prominent figure.
and he was always treated with consider
alton by the veterans, and money raised
20 allow him 10 be present
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
SHAW THE ABSENTEE.
Playwright is an Irish Landlord, Al
though a Socialist.


Bernard Shaw is well stocked with the
worlds commodities. He is a socialist by
name. but he nevertheless owns property
in every quarter of the globe in the
New Age, a London publication, the sar-
castle Celt gives an inventory Of some Of
his properties, as follows:
4 am an absentee Irish landlord. As
such I have by no means an idle job.
whatever my tenants may think. I have
to give bit OF my mind to the manage
ment Of the estate. That is to say. / do
3 per cent of the work and my agent does
the other % per cent. while / get IS per
cent OF the rents and he gets per cent.
By far the greater part Of my income
comes TO me as an absentee capitalist.
The last time I had any capital to spare
II was driven out Of the country: that is
to say, | lent IL 10 a Canadian municipal
ity instead OF an English one. / had al
ready lent earlier Accommodations to local
authorities in New Zealand
4 am not only an irish absentee, but a
Canadian absentee. and a New Zealand
absentee. draw money regularly from
al three countries which I do not spend
in them. and which ] DO not repay to
them In any way. I am also Scotch alb
sentee: for / have shares in the Caledon-
ian Railway
i am Brazilian absentee; at least I
have shares In the Sac Paulo Railway
Company and I think Sac Pauio is in
Brazil though, 20 be quite frank, it may
be Ia hamschatka or Van Dieman's Land
for all know. ! feel surer about the Ar
gentine Republic: il must certainly be in
South Africa; and I am one of the
proprietors Of its Northern Central rail-
way.
Buenos Ayres also pays me tribute.
Japan owes me the glory II has gained
from a couple Of thousand pounds worth
OF exploded gunpOwder and the slaughter
81 sundry Russians; SO / am entitled to
sign myself an absentee Of that much
admired little state. and to levey bushido
ia the of fir-rv
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
4 Point of Etiquette.

FROM Modern Society,"
A curious little point has arisen over
the general order issued 10 the police
- the city of London.
Sergeants and eonstables are to salute
when passing or addressing commits
stoned officers Of the army or navy in
uniform"
Constables are not under orders Of the
army or navy, and it is quite conceivable
that a policeman might have towel
assist a military diner to the police court.
Must he salute before the arrest? Here
we stickleTs for etiquette reach salutation
point
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
Liked the Changes.

from the Nashville American.
He sent his wife South for the win
ter"
Did she get any benefit from the trip?'
Yes; the change did her good
Must have been expensive"
He sent her a 800 bill once a month"
Il suppose she got it broken the same
day"
yes the change did her good"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
AFTER JUDGE'SSCALP
Shanghai Lawyer Arrives to
Fight Whitley.
HIS IMPEACHMENT IS SOUGHT
+. VI. Brooks VIII Come to wash
ingtOn 10 Press Charges Against
Jurist, Whom He Accuses of Dis
qualifying Him Unfuirly-DnmnEe
Suit OF $4,000 Pending.

New York, Jan. 4.-The arrival in New
York en- route to Washington Of F. Nj
Brooks, recently Of the American bar al
Shanghai, marks the latest step In the
proceedings looking toward the impeach-
ment of Judge Libbeus r. Whitley, the
first and only occupant of the bench in
the recently created United States court
for China,
MI Brooks is one Of six members OF
the bar disbarred by what they claim to
be high-handed and illegal procedure on
the part of Judge Whitley Mr. Brooks,
besides being one OF the most active in
the bringing of the proceedings. is also
suing In the courts for 10000 damages
on the claim that Judge Whitley and his
clerk, L, z. Hlnkley. conspired 20 ruin
his practice Mr.. Brooks consented to
tell something Of what he claims are the
causes for the present actions TO be begun
in Washington
when Judge Wiley found that he
could not disqualify three-quarters Of the
bar at Shanghai from practice in China
without mourning serious personal re-
sponsibiiity, he set about to find excuses
for his action. Lacking Shanghai causes
in my case, he stated that my record
in Honolulu was such that I dare not
return there.
Proved His Honesty.
II think I have now demonstrated the
falsity OF this charge even to thu judges
satisfa ton, for when I learned that he
was to leave Shanghai early in Deem
Der for the United States, TO defend him
self in the impeachment proceeding here,
took an earlier steamer for Honolulu.
there filed papers against him for con-
spiracy and had them served on him
when the Pacific mail liner from Shan
CHAT touched at Honolulu with the Judge
or hoard. I then took the same steamer
for San Francisco.
Although the Judge is not expected
by the bench and bar OF Shanghai ever
10 return there. he viii be obliged to
take notice Of these conspiracy proceed
ings instituted in Honolulu. II is not
that we lawyers cannot ind other and
more profitable fields Of practice outside
Of China, but that a most important prln-
ciple Is at stake-the right Of an hon
orable lawyer 20 make an honorable Ilv-
ing-and It is for this that We are here
10 contend"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05

From the Yonkefs Statesman.
Pop"
Yes. my SON."
Did the stork bring that new baby of
Ours2"
Yes, my SON"
Guess he was mighty glad to get rid Of
it, it cries so much!'
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
Wise Tommy.

From Life,
ma" began Tommy. trying for the
sixth time 10 say something
Tommy, said hts mother sternlv.
didn't I tell you not 10 interrupt Mrs.
Gaddie and me? Wait until we have fin
ished."
But, ma. I want TO say this to-day"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05

Girardville. Jan. AFTER being miss
ing for seventeen years. a gold watch
stolen from William Smith was returned
yesterday by registered mall The chain
taken at the same time did not accom-
pany the watch nor was there any expla-
nation to IT,
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
His Unfortunate Business.

From the Catholic STANDARD and Times
why is IT," asked the fox, that you
always look so gaunt?"
"Oh!" replied the wolf, TITS all due 10
the business I'm in. I always have 10
keep away from the door until there's
nothing left in the house to eat
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-05
az OId Acnnnintnnce-

Prom London Paper
Hello, RummeI. hear your watch has
been stolen"
Yes, but the thief has already been
arrested only fancy. the stupid fellow
took il to the pawnshop. There IL was at
once recognized as mine, and the thief
was locked up"