Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1908-06-25
A DESIGNING WIDOW.
ways Fellow May Prove His
Love.

tily.
Those medieval fellows had such an
advantage over us" complained the
bachelor. when n chap loved a girl all
he had to do to prove It was to get an
ether chap to say he didn't. and then 20
break the other chaps head. That was
a sure sign"
And It was so easy" remarked the
widow.
YES" agreed the bachelor enthusiasts
ticaly. "1s there anybody whose head
YOU particularly want broken? l feel re-
markedly like fighting"
"Of course you do said the widow,
sympathetically. THE fighting spirit is
born in every man. But dueling isn't
sign OF love- It's n sign of egotism,
hurt pride. the spirit OF competition the
dog-in-the- manager feeling. Besides It's
out of fashion"
We'll" sighed the bachelor. then 1
suppose / shall have to save your life or
die for you
you might" said the widow, noddlng
encouragingly, but It wouldn't prove
anything-except that you had a sense
of the picturesque and dramatic. Sup
pose you did save my life wouldn't you
child or even any little stray dog who
might happen to fall ont OF boat or be
caught in fire or get under the feet of
a runaway"
'I've got IT," cried the bachelor; I'll
write book of poems and dedicate them
to you
The widow toyed with her spoon.
you've done that to-several girls be-
That's IT," cried the bachelor. How
IS man going to tell when he's in love
when he feels that same way-every
time?'
Have you forgotten your SOUP" ask
ed the widow. glancing at the untouched
plate in front OF the bachelor.
The bachelor picked up his spoon LAM
gu!dly.
NO. he said. but"
Because If you had" said the widow.
sit would have been proof"
"A-what?'
"A proof" repeated the widow. For
getting to eat your meals Is the first sign
of love. A man may write poetry and
swear love by all the planets separately.
but If he sits down opposite you an hour
afterward and orders mutton chops and
gravy and devours them to the last
crumb either he doesn't mean what he
says or doesn't know what he is talking
about. When he let's his breakfast grow
cold and forRetr TO go out to lunch and
loses his interest in.his @nner It's q sure
sign of love"
1T might be a sign OF dyspepsia" sug-
gested the bachelor, doubtfully.
! "Oh, WE'LL" proceeded the widow, sip
| ping her soup leisurely there are other
signs besides lost appetite"
| The bachelor looked hopeful.
! lis one of them smelling violets all
| day when there aren't any round; and
feeling a funny jump in your throat
every time you catch sight of a violet
hat; and suddenly discovering You have
written, Send me eight quarts of vio-
lets and widow instead of eight quarts
Of gasoene and a paten pump"
The widow leaned so far over her soup
that her eyes were completely shaded by
the brim of her violet hat.
| Yes" she said. gently, loss OF rea-
son Is one OF thcm-and loss OF memory"
| And loss of sleep?'
And loss of common sense"
And loss of .ef-respect"
| "And OF your powers Of conversation. =
| Nonsense said the bachelor; "a man
In love can say more fool things"
| The widow put down her spoon EN-
| phatically.
| "A man in love" she contradcted,
| cant talk at all! It's not the things he
says. but the things he isn't able to say;
the things that choke right up in his
| throat"
1--WE had that" interrupted the bache-
lor.
| "Had-what?"
The Iove-jump in the throat"
And did you ever go up stairs to light
the gas and turn on the water instead;
or walk three blocks In the wrong direc-
tion without knowing 1t: or hunt 10 min
utes 70, your shoes and then discover i,
was your collar button or your hat tina;
you had LOST"
"Or add column Of figures and get a
poem for the answer; or break your neck
running to the Office and then have to 81,
down and think what you came down
early for; or begin n business letter dear.
est Smith and drop 1t In the box with.
out stamp, or read you paper upside
down. or"
you've got it, cried the widow.
II know It," sighed the bachelor
dreadfully!"
1.-The idea, I mean" said tho widow
blushng. Those are the real proofs OF
love"
But" protested the bachelor they
aren't impressive How are you going
to let the girl know
"A girl always knows" declared tbs
widow.