davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
AUTOS cHuRN BUTTER.

Farmer Utilises Hoot-wagons White
They Are Crossing bridge.
''The road that runs from Denver out
past Petersburg and on down to Little
ton. Castle Rock. Larkspur. Palmer
Lake, Colorado Springs and oil points
south" passes the home Of John g.
Muller and is thlckly traversed by auto
mobiles. In fact, one Of those Joy bug.
giles comes sky.hootin' along about ev.
cry second, or perhaps oftener, keeping
peaceable residents Of that community
either Siding along as close to the edge
Of the road "a the barb wire will per.
NIT, or climbing trees.
II occurred to Muller that with all
those autos streaming by he might util.
lie them to his own advantage. and
auto-churned butter Is the result.
There's small bridge, about 20 feet
long. over a little ditch In front Of his
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
WHEN ANOlfAN WRITES A CHECK
,sssfx $1,000

she made her account good. She puffed
right up and said she would show him
that he was wrong and that she had
money in the bank. Half an hour later
she came down to the bank with her
check book and the explanation that
"she knew she was right. for there were
at least half dozen blank checks left
In the book!'
Another popularity Is the way they
make out checks to themselves. Where
a man makes II out to cash" woman
makes II to the order Of Mary Brown,
signs It Mary Brown, and turns It over
and indorses II "Mary Brown" Thus
far have women progressed In the last
ten years. since It became common for
them to do general banking business,
II remains to be seen how much they
will develop In the next ten years
Chicago Inter Ocean.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
most only way Oft in enother end Of

most only way Oft In enother end Of
town.
my sauseg an brede he'd Civ out. so
l went out be.en an kun tn a nice
hous. the ladey who kun tn the dore
sed she pityed me an TUX me inside
an Civ me lots tn etc, she kept taken
tn me an sed waz much lik her boy
who grcwd up an had gone of.
she Civ me pie an kake an say 1t waz
pudin tn goin tn skule. but after
awhyel herd some one taken to some
body else in the next rum. then the
ladey went out an herd her say Yes
offisir he luks like the pikshur Of the
boy In the paper who run off.
when the cop kun In rendered
what the Ole sluth did wunst an yield
waz crazcy from bug asylum an
Pretended tn hav a fit an the ladey
tainted IN the cop run tn her an es'
kaped.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

kudent get a OBJ. every thing lukt
dark tn me.
finally l desided to walk past our
hous In the alley. figured the kuk
mite Sc me- list wanted her tn let
the folks know kud live without there
v,ttels.
walkt past the hous twice. nobody
semed to notes me. ! waz Just goln
around the korner to grosery when
run rite into pa. he wasn't exey be-
Klaus we WIZ In the strete. he waz
wurse than ole everett True ever will
get.
when l got In tn hous wax put In
the bath tub an wasn't tire timez wuns
with hot water an twice with cold
even the dog growld at me. at the
supper label the folks were quiet
felt like an outkast. but after he'd
gone tn bed mother kun up an put
her ar,nz around me IN we talkt II
over an ges everything Is square now
an | am goin tn church t0morrer.-
Cincinnati Post.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
BORED AND PLUGGED.
The Truthful story Of = ship struck
by Lightning.

The Truthful story Of ship struck
BY Lightmlng.
I'm Duluth down on the docks some
days ago some fresh water Ancient
Mariners were talking OF adventures
OH the raging MAN," began an old
steamship man. "Captain H. said
one. 1t seems to me I've heard some.
where that your vessel was once struck
by lightning while sailing, sailing over
the bounding mainT
"'Yep. twice. said Captain II. Hap.
pcncd off Point Aux BarQucs bout AZ.
teen years ago. We were joggIn' long
when q thunderstorm overlook us, and
the very first flash Of lightnin' struck
the deck amidships and bored a hole
as big as my right leg right down
through the bottom Of the vessel
"And she foundered. Of courseT
"sNo, sir. The water began rushin'
In, and she would have foundered, but
there came second fash, and bolt
struck my foreto' gallant mast. 1t
was cut of near the top, turned bot.
tom end up, and as It came down 1t
entered the hole and plugged 1t up a.
tight as q drum. When we got down
to drydock we simply sawed of either
end and left the plug In the pMnks.' -
Washington Herald.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Cherry HtstOPy.

1t Ii still asserted In school books
that cherries were introduced to Eng
land by the "fruiterer" or green grocer
Of Henry WILL; also. that they were
not common for hundred years after
that time. This Is an error. Mr..
Thomas Wright found the name In ev.
cry one Of the Anglo.Saxon vocabula.
ries which he edited. So common were
they and SO highly esteemed that the
time for gathering them became rec.
ognized festival-"cherry fair" or
feast" And this grew into pro-
verbal expression for heeting Joys.
Cover says the friars taught that 'lifo
Is but a cheryefayre," and Hope zen.
dureth but a thrOwe. right as 1t were q
cheryefeste." There Is more than one
record Of the purchase Of trees for the
kings garden ut Westminster centuries
before Henry VIII. was born. But
Pliny contradicted the fable, as II In
prophetic mood. After telling that Lu.
cullus first brought cherries to Rome
(froM Pontus, In $50 A. y. CO.. he adds
that In the course Of 100 years they
have spread widely, "even passing over
sea to Britain."-Cornhill Magazine.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
MYSTERIES OF SONG SLANG.
Onions Are Akin 70 Sentiment In
the Music Hail World.

Onions Are Akin TO Sentiment In
tho Music Hail World.
How many people would guess the
meaning Of a spanish onion song?"
This strange phrnse--one Of the many
to be found in the professionals die.
tiOnary Of slang-is used to denote the
music hall ballad, and owes Its origin
to the fact that no self-respectlng mem.
Der Of its race would be without pm.
thetlc reference to dear old mother or
somebody's sweetheart far away"
Now, pathos draw tears, and 40 do
onions. The rest IL obvious, says the
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
These ballads are also known by the
name Of "Glve me your kind applause
songs" a title which Is also applied to
dittles whose duty 1t IL to draw atten.
ton to some mlsdeed on the part Of the
imperial government.
Artists, too, always allnde to the last
song they sing as their third song,
though in many cases 1t may be their
second or their fourth.
"Breathers' are so called because the
unfortunate artist who sings them has
no chance to breathe unless, perhaps,
he surreptitiously drops stray note
here and there and thus draws a few
molecules of air into his lungs. These
songs-of which "The Irish Christen.
Ing" Is an examplc---always have at
least five long verses. which are run
one into the other and sung without a
break Of any kind.
A type Of song which Is designed
with the express purpose Of deceiving
the audience Is the "cod ballad" With
great ingenuity the composer begins
bis verse In a highly sentimental tone,
when, just as the audience Is com.
menclng to search for Its pocket hand.
kerchief. a sudden turn Is given to the
words and every one realizes that he
has been tricked. The whole thing Is,
In fact, veriest parody. "Mingle your
eyebrows with mine, love-" Is a case In
point.
At the present moment the music hall
world IL searching high and low for
concerted numbers, which form D per
cent of the seaside. These are merely
solos, rewritten to form trios. quartets
or Quintets for Pierrots and outdoor
theatrical troupes. while extra bust.
ness Is added to suit requirements.
Motto songs. which are increasing In
popularity every day, will also. It Is OK.
pected, help to pass the hours for the
loungers on "tlosc yellow sands" These
ditties always point nm excellent moral.
The production number" Is term
which needs some explanation. 1t
means that the song Is elaborated or
featured with chorus girls and Is
produced OH q more elaborate scale
than the ordinary number. 1t also re.
quires special scenery. with effects.
Soubrette songs give the Idea Of
songs always sung by soubrettes. They
must, however, fulfill certain other re-
quircments. The chorus, rs In other
songs, do not remain the same, the
couplet In every case being differently
VOrdod
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

It IL very unfortunate that the re-
taller. speaking generally. does not up.
preciate the value Of local advertising.
1t would seem rs though ambition
should dictate the enlargement Of ones
business, and to many merchants such
result Is easily attained. The way
to do It Is quite simple.
1t Is well known that women are the
best buyers and, as a rule. the goods
they buy are the most profitable. To
attract them your store must be mag.
netic--i. e., clean, neat. stocks well ar.
ranged and the goods appealing to them
prominently displayed.
Doing this is properly classed as ad.
vertising, but 1t must be backed by
intelligent, well-informed and courteous
clerks to make the sales. After having
accomplished this reform then, by all
means, contract for a regular space In
your local papers and place your ad.
vertisement In advance. Arrange the
copy for frequent changes, make the
matter and makeup attractive, and be
sure to refer to the seasonable goods at
the proper time.
II such a simple course Is followed
the result will be a pleasant surprise
to any merchant who has not been a
believer in publicity. The good mer.
chant realizes that he does not have to
cut prices to make sales. There Is an
easier way to make business and keep
profits In these times. The rule IL az
simple as can be--advertise and sup
port your announcements with an at
tractive store and courteous treatment
of stomers.-Hardware
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
COLD WATER WEDDINGS.
This Marriage Ceremony Consists Of
Washing the Head.

This Marriage Ceremony Consists Of
Washing the Head.
Marriage among the Hopi. a tribe
Of the Pueblo Indians, Is an institution
regarding which those most concerned
have least to say. When the parents Of
a girl find It expedient for her to get
married, they look up an available man
and negotiate with his parents.
After the matter has been arranged
tho principals are notified. the girl
goes to the home Of the bridegroom's
parents and grinds corn for them for
three weeks. whilo the bridegroom
makes a kind Of sash for the bride.
Then ono morning at sunrise they both
battle their heads In cold water, which
completes the ceremony.
There have been instances Of tho
bridegroom refusing to 90 through the
performance, says writer In Outing.
It has then proceeded without him aud
been accounted valid. and several weeks
later he has yielded and had his head
bathed.
The Navajo ceremony Ia much moro
elaborate and impressive. but them the
Navajo girls are much nicer. The reg.
ular tarif on a Navajo girl entering
the port Of matrlmony for the first
time IL twelve horses On the second
occasion the tax Ia nine horses, while
subsequent marriages are free.
This IL not purchase money, but 10
merely tribute of respect to a moth.
er-in-law and token Of appreciation
Of the care and expense involved In
bearing ana rearing the lady. a recogni.
ton not unworthy Of consideration by
civilized brldegrooms. On the other
hand, and deserving Of great condemna.
ton, Is that law Of many tribes. un.
written but Of much sanctity, that a
man and his mOther-ln-law shall never
meet after the ceremony.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Very Sagaci0us.

A farmer had very sagacious dog
which he had trained to count his
sheep as they passed through partic-
ular opened gate, against which a pile
of stones We're placed for the dogs use.
As each sheep passed through the dog
placed one Of the stones aside. One
day, much to the farmers surprise, he
found the dog trying to break a stone
IN half. and on himself counting the
flock he found there had been an ad-
dition In the night Of lamb.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

that erned my daley breds today. I
wurked hard enuf.
the milkman haz q nice dauter. I
tole her wunst today that expect to
be King orssomethin' some day. tole
her expected to 60 al round the wurld
some day an she buged out her eyer.
! FOUND button In one poket that
susen CIV me las woke an believer her
nkel tu my love Civ II to this girl. !
tole her that she Ii q dreme an that
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
THURSDAY.

! walkt al mite but from what the
peple seq aln't no wher mere arizona.
kun tn mllkmanz hous this morn
Ing an aslt for wurk. he askt what
kin DO an seq any kind uf honest toll
that's respecktabel an he put me. at
wurk fedin kowz
never did Tx kowz much. they arc
al rite In summer tn LUX at. but | new
er did Tx tu wurk around them. fele
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

house. lie Just took up the floor Of
that bridge and relaid It, In corduroy
fashion. with round pieces Of timber set
very closely together, but which revolve
when an auto or any other vehicle
strikes them. Then. under that bridge
and attached to the logs, he framed up
a system Of cogs which work whenever
the bridge floor does. lie carried o
piece Of betting to the house and at.
tached It to the handle Of revolving
churn.
Now, every time anything passes over
that bridge the floor turns, and the
turning Of the floor turns his churn,
over and over. with marvellous rapidity.
The autos and other vehicles come so
closely together that Muller soon has o
mess Of very fine butter churned up.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Prohibitionist Paraphrase.

"What we want now" said one pro-
hibition campaigner, us some pic
turesque title for our candidate, such
as II Is now customary to give the head
Of the ticket"
"very true" replied the other.
"why not refer to him as the peerless
leader "-Washington Star.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
FRIDAY.

the boss made me git up way In the
mite We had got TO town with the
wagon wax on before Owl carr was
runen. It was cold an krepy. kinder
wisht that kud 90 tn skule agen but
l dident let on tho. know Egle Pete
always kept a stiff upper LIP.
the milkman stopt often at places
whcr he went inside. wunst a bum
KUN up tn the wagon an askt for milk
tole him that waz brave man
nltho small an he lated but he waz
bluff nj rite but ! waz skarcd al rite.
hnolly we kun mere our hous. but
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

anyhow. ges they vii wisht they had
ben respccktfel ter me when they here
how ! hev got mp In the world after
awhyel an nm rich an own lots Of
houzez. ! nm on termorrcr fer nevada
tn get rich dIgen gold. hev bin watch.
en- a car bcln loded TO 60 to arizona
an ! kin walk the rest Of the way.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Compllmentar to Hin.

"Really," said Cholly sappey, "
cawn't understand Miss Rood at all.
She actually called me a crank"
1.-THE ideal" exclaimed Miss Cutting.
"HOw hattering"
"Flattering?"
Eyes. a crank, You know, II a man
with one idea."-Cathollc Standard
and Times.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
The Occasion Tor IL.

"He says he never prayed In all his
life"
"What a monotonous existence! Ap-
parently he has never been In tight
place."-The Catholic Standard and
TimeA
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
we don't take milk Of the man wurked
foS I sanA ,nuot ~

for 30 wasent much skared.
but We kun tn Susen cvens hous ana
tole the boss he waz cold an ! wud
TAX the milk In. waz In hopes Susen
mite know It wax me. hammered the
bak dore. maid a big raket.
finely herd sum wun shy now git
him TOwscr. ! run. ! bette the dog
to the wagon. the boss waz aslepe.
the horsez got skared at tho dog and
run. the boss fell out. the horsez run
a long ways when they stopt crawl
ed from under the wrek an run thru Q
park.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

what It's kracked up tn bee. wud
Civ wun Of my fore quarterz fer drink
Of water but ges kin stand 1t awhyel
yet.
got to thinker that II mud iie
for want Of water the kids at skule
wud fele purity bad an maybe susen
Evens wud put the wrethe ! Civ .ler
for Kristmes on my gray an maybe
they wud fire of salut over my gray
thinkin' that dIde game an with my
butes on az the Teller who kot killed
BY DIX Of Esle Pas did.
II must be m awfcl long ways tn
arizona.
am mitcy tired setin' down tn.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Observation-Disclosures,
! ADVENTURES OF /
! LITTLE WILLIE. ;
He Tires Of His School Books; {
Runs Away from Home In an
Attempt to Become famous.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
MONDAY.

MONDAY.
Gee II betes the dlkenx how a Teller
has ter 60 ter school all the time. !
wisht that I was big like Fiten bob
svens an kud 60 off on battle ships to
phases an kud see sites. l bet the girls
wudsnt laf at me then an litter when
I KUN bak with models an things.
this gografy lessen Ii awfel
hard an the teacher Is eros today to
me tn bekauz | dident know my other
lessons for set up late las mite readin
robson kruso.
but this Is to be my las day In skule
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
A Wall street Recruit.

The manager--I don't exactly like
the way you have drawn your tramp.
You make him talk like stock broker.
The playright-Well, that's all right
this year, amt it?-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
SATURDAY,

it, purity hard to hav the polise on
yer trnk. al morning l lodged them
one big cop got me- but tole him that
| wurked rite around the corner an kud
prove It. the bluff worked. but my
heart waz In my mouth.
! tried for wurk at several phases
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Fatalities.

"Yes," said the beauteous young
thing, "when l asked papa II / might
60 mountain climbing he took my head
of. But I had my own way, of
course, and finally the crowd got start.
ed, and you know they made me put
on a lot Of wraps and things that sim.
ply suffOcated me. And about half.
way up slipped and fell over a cliff
and broke my neck! Indeed, yes.
And when they had lifted and pulled
me back on the trail ! absolutely died
from pain. But before long was
able to 60 on to the top, but by the
time we were almost there collapsed
and sat down, for ! could never
breathe again. But they made me pull
myself together and In time we got
to the summit, and there 1t was SO
cold froze to death! OO-ooh! And
was glad, l can tell you, when we
came down at last. and as soon az
they got me home went to bed, dead
from exhaustion. "--lDdependent.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
TUESDAY.

must hev kun an awfel ways last
mite In this car for 1t bumped around
al mite. its kold in here but there Is
some straw around the boxes 30 1 ges
1 kan kcpe warm for | hcv my mind
maid up tn stick 1t out.
but etin' cold sauseg an bred. amt
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
WEDNESDAY.

II he'd knowd that the car wax
bein bumped al round the raleroad
yards ! wud not hev gone thursty al
day an mite. when ! got out at last
found that 1 w rite here at home al.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

she wud lux wei in a manshun Xix mine
10 ty be an after super she Civ me
two doughnuts. I etc wun. the other
10 for my piller tn slepe on.
the boss drove me to bed ut oklock.
the life Of some wurken men II hard.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

Ever notice how many things there
are In the shop windows that you have
no earthly use for?
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19
Not Meant for Him.

"See here" Indignantly cried the
transient guest. "here's a collar button
In this stew"
"Oh, that's q mistake, sir" replied
the waiter.
"A mistaken?
Eyes, sir; we never give extras ex.
cept to our regular customers The
Catholic Standard and Times.
Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1908-09-19

Too many mem crowd into an up
holstered elevator rather than make an
attempt to climb the ladder Of success
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1908-06-06
RAYMOND HITCHCOCK
COMMITTED TO T0MBS

New York, June 5.--Raymond Hitch
COCK, the comedian, was committed to
the Tombs prison without bail this af-
ternoon when his trial on charges pre-
ferred by little girls, which began to-
day. WAS suddenly adjourned until next
Monday.
The adjournment came when Hitch
cocks counsel conferred privately with
Justice Goff, Immediately after the first
juror had been selected. At the con-
clusfon OF the conference, Justice Golf
announced that in view of what the at
torney had told him he would adjourn
the case until next Monday, and in the
meantime Hitchcock would be remand
ed to the Tombs prison without ball.
Mr.. Hitchcock's counsel, Mr.. Steuer,
said he asked for adjournment because
he had just been retained by Hitchcock
and was not familiar with the case. He
said that Justice Cioff committed
Hitchcock without any suggestion from
him OF the assistant district attorney.
At previous trial on similar charge
the case against the actor fell fiat when
on the witness stand declared that I'M
der the influence Of an agent of the So
ciety for the Prevention of Cruelty to
Children she had periured herself before
the grand jury that indicted Hitchcock.
The complainant In the case called
today Is Helen Won Hagen. and tho al
legations sworn TO by Flora Winston
and Elsie Voeclts. the other alleged VIC
tim, are expected Ia figure In the trial.
The trial of Flora Winston on n
charge OF perjury Will be begun imme-
diately after the conclusion of the
Hitchcock trial.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1908-06-06
MADE THE DEAF TO HEAR |
DIR. Albert Jansen, OF Berlin, World
Famed Aurist, Out of Pure Mercy,
Operated ON Two Children.


Chicago June e.--spruning the gold
OF milionalres, DIR. Albert Jansen OF
Berlin one OF tho greatest eye and ear
surgeons in the world, operated yes
terday out OF pure mercy and without
price on two Unfortunate wallis Of the
tenements.
The skill Of the famous surgeon. for
which the wealthy men and women OF
Chicago In vain have begged and plead
ed with offers Of fortunes, and which
az last was given for nothing, resulted
IN two cures. The children. who had
been dear, were made to hear.
DIR. Jansen came across the sea TO
attend the recent sessions of the Amer
lean Medical association.
The children upon whom Or. Jansen
operated and to whom he restored their
hearing are:
Willie Simpson. years old, and Ma
rion Stuhler 8 Years old.
The operations were performed at st
Iuke's hospital in the presence of %
Chicago physicians and surgeons.
The two children had been deaf from
babyhood. Assesses had formed In
their ears and destroyed their hearing.
Marion Stuhler was entirely deaf VIII
lie Simpson could distinguish very
loud noise, like the crash OF a bass
drum. II IL occurred close to his ear.
1t was impossible for the fathers and
mothers OF these children of poverty 10
gain an audience with the world IA
nous Berlin surgeon. But they wrote
him two pathetic letters. in which they
told him of the great affliction that had
befallen their little ones and begged
him to cure them.