davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
unbelievable Taxes.

"In the past" said the tax assessor,
governments were wiser. They levied
taxes that could not be sworn off.
There was, for instance, the English
birth tax of the seventeenth century
A laborer paid shillings as birth tax;
duke paid ESQ. You couldn't get
round it. --- ...
"Burials were taxed, according to
the station of the dead, from shilling
to f25. That, too, could not be lodged.
marriages were taxed. A duke to
marry paid ESQ; a common person,
like yourself, paid half crown.
''In those days you paid a tax on
every servant, on every dog, on every
horse, on your carriage, your hearth,
your windows, watches, clocks, wigs,
hair powder, plate, ribbons, bricks,
COAL gauze and candles. "-Cincinnati
Enquirer
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
EXPULSION RECOMMENDED
TWO Members of Duma Accused of
Reasonable Speeches.

st. Petersburg, March THE com.
m1ttee of the duma which has had
the matter under Consideration has
decided to recommend the exclusion
Of M. Kolubfakin and NJ Kososotoff.
M. Kolubiakin is the deputy from St.
Petersburg whose surrender was de-
manded by the government because of
the charge against him that he made
a reasonable speech at Samara in
1905, while the minister of justice
proposed that NJ Kososotoff be ex-
cluded from the duma on account of
a post-election speech at Ufa. The
first named deputy is a Constitutional
Democrat and the second a Socialist
M Kolubiakin is considered a valu-
able member of the lower house. The
committee delayed its action until the
conviction of the two deputies on the
charges specified left it no alternative.
In the matter of M. Kolubiakin the
exclusion will not be made permanent
pending action by the senate on his
appeal.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Il Mas Eia Eriend

A little story in German and Eng.
lish, accompanied by an interpreter,
drifted into the indianapolis News Of.
flee. Here it is: Two Germans stepped
into an auction house where sale of
watches was going on. They occupied
front seats and soon attracted the at.
tention of the auctioneer. AS he dwelt
upon the merits of a watch he was Of.
fering for sale to the highest bidder
the auctioneer turned to the Germans
from time to time as the price mount,
ed-$6, $3.50. 81, $3.50. AS the auc.
toneer nodded at one Of the Germans
there came an answering nod, which
he took to be bid.
'That Teller knows me-" said one
German to the other.
eyes, sure" said the other.
The nodding kept on. Finally the
auctioneer extended the watch to the
holders. tits yours" he said. "Teu
dollars. You're the buyer"
Zach, nein," said the German. "I'm
the Schwob (suabian); mein freund
heir list der Bayer (Bavarian)."
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
First American Plav.

The first play written by an Ameri-
can produced in this country, according
to the Philadelphia Public Ledger, was
the tragedy, 1.-THE Prince of Parthia, %
by Thomas Godfrey, which was
brought out at the Southwark theater
in the Quaker City in April, 1767, by
Lewis Hallam's company, the first Or
ganization Of players to visit Phila-
delphia. Godfrew was an ambitious
young poet, who died at an early age.
His play was above mediocrity and an
important part Of the volume Of his
works published in 1865.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
lmpertinent.

Speaking of man noted for his i'm
pertinence, an acquaintance said:
BLANKS impudence was second only
to that Of a waiter I heard about the
other day.
Look here, WAITER said guest,
this fish is not cooked properly
"1 know it, SIR said the waiter,
but you told me it was for your WIFE
"'Well, what of that?' asked the sur
prised guest
Why said the waiter, 4 knew
that If the lady was your wife she
couldn't be very particular
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
SMALLPOX SCARE IN ROME
Government Prohibits kilograms Re-
ferring to Outbreak.

Rome, March via Paris, March 4.
The municipality Of Rome has pur-
sued mistaken policy in endeavor-
ing to suppress the news Of an out
break of smallpox in this city in the
fear of frightening away the spring
tourist trade, which constitutes a
large source of revenue to the cap
ital Instead of pacifying the public
fears the method pursued in prohibit
ing the sending of kilograms referring
to the outbreak has given rise to the
spread of the widest and most exag-
gerated reports.
There IS practically panic in Rome
over this smallpox scare. All the
vaccine material in the city has been
exhausted and fresh supply has been
ordered from Switzerland. The laza-
retto of Santa Sabina, where the cases
have been isolated, has been surround
ed by Gordon of troops. This action
has resulted in the shutting out of
many tourists, who are lodged in a
nearby hotel and has caused much
--r1..:~t. No Ar,1vriouns II, tl1o
hotel in question.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
A Madman's STRANGE Belief,

An unfortunate maniac was confined
in one of the Scottish lunatic asylums,
his particular infrmity being an un-
shakable belief that every day was
Christmas day and that he was din
ing sumptuously on turkey or roast
beef and a good slice Of plum pud-
dine--His real dict. however war-of
the plainest, he being served twice
daily with dish Of oatmeal porridge
After daily describing to his attendants
the pleasures he had tasted in his cut
of turkey or what not he as regularly
added, "Yet, somehow or other, every
thing that l eat, tastes Of porridge."
This story it was which gave rise to
the saying, GAS palatable as the mad
mans porridge."
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Science and Sound Fact.

'"The workings of the human mind
when asleep are full of WONDER" re-
marked a scientist who was paying a
visit to an acquaintance. "Have you
ever started up from sound dream
Io11~ SLEEP, With e-SIy the
alert and with your whole being thrill
ed with vivid yet 1ndefinable feeling
that something was wrong and instant
action required?"
"Often," replied his hostess, land in
nearly every case have found that
was awakened by the umbling Of my
husbands key at the front door!'
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Indifferent.

Il can't give you an opinion on that
question:" the statesman replied, "be.
cause it's question pay no attention
to. am Indifferent to it-as indiffer-
ent as the backswoodsman's wife.
That lady, you know, looked on while
her husband had a fierce hand to hand
tussle with a bear, and afterward she
said 1t was the only fight she ever
saw where she didn't care who won.' y
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05

tanned to this command Of Their
nerves. To jump Is one thing. however,
while to fall into a senseless panic is
quite another.
To blow out is the duty and destiny
Of fuses, and when they have done 1t
such danger as there was Is all over.
Nothing worse than delay can follow,
unless the passengers proceed to make
wild rushes for which there Is no need
whatever. Travellers should keep these
facts carefully in mind.-New York
Times.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
A Use For His Obituary,

A well meaning and conscientious
editor on being shown by the man
most interested that the death of the
commandment was falsely reported in
his paper, apologized profusely and Of
fered to make it all right
well print correction at once" he
said.
WELL" said the man who wasn't
dead, perhaps it would be better to let
1t stand. I'll show it to my friends
when they want to borrow money"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Painful Etinuette-

The royal court of France used to be
a great place for etiquette. Louis XIV.
once caught severe cold owing to
the fact that on his arising from his
bed one cold morning the lord Of the
chamber, whose duty it was to hand
him his shirt, happened to be absent
present had the courage to trangress
etiquette by handing the garment to
the shivering monarch.-London Scrap
Book.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Some Famous Salt Lakes.

The Dead sea is forty miles long and
nine miles wide. The Great Salt lake
is seventy miles long and eighty miles
wide, the largest body of brine in the
world. There is evidence to show that
once the Great Salt lake was at least
$50 miles in length and $50 in width,
nine times it's present area. The Dead
sea contains about "a per cent of SOL
ids, one-third Of which is pure salt,
while Of the % per cent of solid mat
ter in the waters Of Great Salt lake
nearly all is salt.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Solicitous,

An old lady unaccustomed to travel
ing innocently seated herself in first
class carriage, although she only had a
third class ticket. The guard, think
ing she had made mistake, popped
his head into the carriage and inquired,
Are you first class, ma 'am?"
mo, sir, not altogether" she replied,
"but much brighter than was, thank
you."-London Scraps.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05

Fuses Are Made to Blow Out.
With everybody travelling more or
less, usually more, in electrically driv.
en- cars and trains, the time has GER
tainly come for general appreciation
Of the fact that the blowing out of
fuses is nothing to excite alarm.
To be startled-to Jump" as the
saying is-When this happens is the
privilege Of all except the professional
electricians. The latter are bound by
professional pride to show perfect i'm
FEASIBILITY even when the sudden flash
singes their fingers, and it is delight.
full to see how many of them have at.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Reinforcements for Morocco.

Paris, March THE cabinet voted
formally to send 1000 additional SOL
diers to Morocco with the object of
continuing the aggressive policy of
the government in that country as
well as affording rest to the troops
who have become tired out in the re-
cent fighting with the Moors. Parlia-
ment will be asked to appropriate the
sum of 100000 for general relief as
we'll as improvement work in Morocco.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
His Narrow Escape.

II tell you, the closing Of the Steenth
National was mighty close call for
me-"
How was that?'
why, a friend had advised me to
put my money in it and
"And you took his advice?"
mo, but would if I'd had any mon
ey."-Philadelphia Ledger.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
TO SUCCEED STlLLINGS.
Said President Will Appoint w. S.
Rossiter Public Printer,

Washington, March 1t is under
stood the president has decided to ap-
point w. S. Rossiter of New York to
be public printer to succeed Charles
s. Stillings of Massachusetts. Mr..
Rossiter has been for several years
chief clerk of the census office and
recently was detailed by the presi-
dent to make an examination into the
conduct Of the business at the govern
ment printing office.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
His Distinction.

A solemn funeral procession, slowly
vending its way up the slope from the
church to the grave, was intercepted
by the old verger, who, pulling his
forelock in the usual rustic style, ad-
dressed the clergyman, whispering In
confidential manner:
"Please, sir, corpse's brother wishes
to speak to yerw-London Tit-Bits.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05

and Governor Enrique Creel and Yno.
cente Ochoa, wealthy men. 1t has a
reserve of 1,700,os7 pesos. The rob-
berry causes no fear as to the banks
soundness. kilograms have been sent
all over Mexico and to the American
border describing the bills and asking
I'll banks and officers to be on the
lookout for the money and the rob
hers
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Realism In Art,

Two artists were boasting how they
could paint. "Do you know" said one,
g" painted sixpence on the ground
one day, and beggar nearly broke his
fingers trying to pick it up?' That's
nothing to what did," said the other.
II painted leg of mutton on stone,
and it was so realistic that dog ate
half the stone before he found out his
mistaken
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
One Drawback.

Olive-What an improvement it will
be If the time ever comes when every
body can get seat in the street cars.
Violet-Oh, l don't know. A girl would
never be sure then that she was pretty.
Puck.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Not a Question of Grammar.

The green reporter turned to Editor
McKelway. (Which should say" he
asked hesitatingly, My boy Henry
laid an egg on the table?'"
'Well," said Editor McKelway i'm
patiently, "if you want something to
merry, let him lay it on the table if he
can Otherwise have him put it there"
Judge
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
The Poets Son.

"Why, Freddy, how dirty you are,
and only yesterday you wrote verse
for papa's birthday, promising always
to wash your hands Clean"
"'Well, mamma, that was only a
poetic license Fliegende Batter.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
A Nautical Secret,

Passenger-What makes this boat
pitch so? Sailor-That's nautical Sc
cret ma'am, that we don't like to give
away; but, SEEM it's you, don't mind
tellin' you that it's the waves.-San
Francisco Call.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
PARTLY True.

Mr.. Nix-I don't believe word of
your story! Weary Well, that part
about my bein' out Of work for nine
years is as true as gospel Philadel-
phia Inquirer
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Asserting Himself.

He-Will you be my wife? She The
idea! Don't be ridiculous. He-Yes, l
know 1t sounds ridiculous; but, then,
I'm not so particular as some men are
Boston Transcript.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
He Wanted to Know.

The Employer (coldly)-Why are you
so late? The Suburbanite (guiltily)-
There were two wrecks on the track
this morning, and The Employer
(testily)-Who was the other one7
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Going On.

terrible noise OF humping and
STAN ping came from Bob's room early
sne morning
Bobby, Bobby" called his mother
from downstairs, what is going on
up there?''
"My Shoes" replied Bob.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
MEXICAN BANK ROBBERY.
institution at Chihuahua Looted Of
295,O00 Pesos.

ESo,OUO PESOS.
Ell Paso, Tex, March "A special
to the Herald from Chihuahua, Mex,
gives details of the robbery of the
Banco Minero. When the bank opened
Monday it was discovered that 295, 900
pesos in bills of the denominations of
1000, 100, so and 20 were missing.
The document vault had been entered
by breaking the lock and the money
vault by taking out stone masonry.
The work is supposed to have been
done Sunday afternoon and night
Several suspects are in jail. The
bills taken are new and can be
traced. The bank was capitalized at
100000 pesos. 1t was backed by
General Luis Terrezas, Ambassador
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
UngaIiant.

my face is my fortune, SIR" she
said.
WELL" he replied, poverty is no dis
grace, but it's awfully inconvenient at
tines"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
The Wicked Husband.

stWhy does man lie to his wife? p
asks woman writer. Dear me, does
he?-Duluth Herald
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Not the Kind He Wanted.

mot the Kind he wanted.
little Willie ran away to hunt red
skins.'
eyes p
"But he didn't find any until his ia
Their had finished with him" -Harper's
Weekly.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Where Idols Are Eaten.


AT certain seasons in some parts Of
India it is the duty of every devoIt
person to eat a special sort of confec-
tionery. Every confectioner in Octo-
Der, for instance, has pole about six
feet high at his door, and to this is
nailed a great hook about foot long
and thick ia proportion. On one side
of this is Il brisk fire, with huge
earthen pan on it. Before the pan a
man may be seen sitting, for nobody
stands when he can sit, with kind of
wooden ladle, and with this he briskly
stirs a quantity Of bubbling, black
looking sugar till it becomes quite
tough. He then scrapes it together
and puts it on piece Of board to cool
little. and then, getting up and dex-
terously throwing it on the large hook.
he begins to pull out the tough sub
stance. He draws it out to the length
of four or five feet at a time and throws
1t back and elongates it again, and so
he manipulutes it till the mass becomes
as white as snow. This composition so
treated is manufactured in all sorts of
sacred forms--fgures Of little idols and
gods-and is eagerly bought for con-
umption.--Strand Magazine.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Indicted for ALLEGED Rebatino.

St. Louis, March indictments
charging the st. Louis and San Fran
cisco Railroad company with granting
rebates and the Chapman & Dewey
Lumber company of Kansas City with
accepting rebates were returned by
the federal grand jury here.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-03-05
Fuses Are Made to Blow Out.

1 A moral, sensible. we'll bred man will
not insult me. No other can.-Cowper.
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1908-09-26
The Foremost Mississippi Trouble


iS me {" Series OF
articles 4 VI. College Chaos
Tho uisssuinri 6 " r,r.n. ..-.-, 80.
80 '''"'S
nary couru. of excn,u ,, - :" Wv "-
hoo, y,v,,r :, an >,;.u...u.. =. - - ""'
v,x ,h. IN, ~. =. ''' "'''' years
.nu-u :, 3, ,., 800. =. s., - ~ " y" ''"'"
-.. -. -. = '"'' '" " e'p"''"'"
-. =. = -, " 4'''''"''N' '"' entrance
a.. =. = = -, ' N' "'ANe " appear
s....-.,-.- 49,, I 80 - '' - me No"eSe' On
:. =, -, - -, I'm $40 S' - 'i' news 9''"h-
- *AN '' w '''4eu" were At one
80 49, -" ''"' '"-
'~ 'Ns'' - 'VV per cent
' W nv ~ eA''e u F'eSF
"" """ 80" az nv
- ~ -" . '0' N""es' al"
~ " "' "A''e '''" 40 8" lou
'-'"' '4' my "s VIZ
'"''" ''' W. ''"N'"N' e"'0'HS "a" ''
N* $3.50 ~ " ' -" ' '''' ''''
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1908-09-26


said in the
The latter of last that Certainly will
hang
he is Objectionable
he has If the action the daily against
a il a position
would
of
President bootlcke
he
unpopuaty
mentioned by him who his official cherers
made opening
happened
consumpion might
enoS" mentioned Pres Hardy seemingly recalled the sale OF those tn
The
President of the College the osrum before the audience under
Of sold
persons
of the scientists followed better fight against ubercu
o
with The
speakers
hear m""t""e but by tn" speakers saying the world should accept
speaker covering
ring especially heavenly
be ikencd
interest how the
heard all of
wholly
particularly OF President
but preceding a
from
long Mr. Hardy remains President;
clique asked !ho
witho
OF asked the for
would
to the
This mani 10
Hardy
to the
the
Mississippi The
has He
because
he'll he
a. 10 . ~
The Southern farm gazette. (Starkville, Miss.) 1895-1909, 1908-09-26

mphacaiy President Hardy did not risk
the students would
he Whitfield the
walking of the single hie of the
President Hardy
When students cheed other speakers but
OF
quite thing that could be
Gunnison news-champion., 1908-07-24
TWO roPE rs"
A Teachers Experience.

MY friends call me The Postum
Preacher" writes MINI. school teach
er, because | preach the gospel of
Postum everywhere | go, and have
been the means of liberating many
'coffee-pot slaves
Il don't care what they call me so
long as ! can help others to see what
they lose by sticking to coffee. and
can show them the way to steady
nerves, clear brain and general good
health by using Postum.
While a school girl drank coffee
and had fits of trembling and went
through a siege of nervous prostration,
which took me three years to rally
from.
Mother coaXed me to use Postum,
but | thought coffee would give me
strength. So things went. and when
/ married ! found my husband and
were both coffee topers. and can
sympathize with a drunkard who tries
to leave of his cups.
AT last in sheer desperation I
bought a package of Postum. followed
directions about boiling 1t. served it
with good cream, and asked my hus-
band how he liked the coffee
We each drank three cups apiece.
and what satisfied feeling it left Our
conversion has lasted several years
and viii continue as long as we live
for 1t has made us new-nerves are
steady. appetites good. sleep sound
and refreshing"
There's Reason" Name given by
Postum Co, Battle Creek. Mich Read
The Road to Wellville." in pkss.
Ever read the above letter. A new
one appear from time to time. They
are genuine, trSe, and full Of human
interest.
Gunnison news-champion., 1908-07-24
coAlAaGvvG 70 MAycn NAT.
oivss orsssv eWeet - Plain cIseh o.
oitA COOavsMs,

One of the newest fancies Of fashiOa
IL the collarette. or ruR, fastened in
the back with hong ends of ribbon.
which hang dowR the back. This is
me latest suggestion In the way Of
bOos or neckpieces for wear out Of
aOOrs. TIE cOllarette 10 . large rh0
made Of paaited ribbon. chiffon. net.
etc, and quite high and full-much
like . PterrOt collar. At the back
there II . large rosette Of ribbon TO
fasten II and from beneath the rosette
the ribbons hanging quitesa distance
down the back. Frequently there is q
rosette ut the back of the hat TO
match that on the collar. The collar
cite and hat should. in fact, be in &C.
cord. and II they are so they will give
quite a dressy effect 10 a plain cloth
or silk costume. For instance. with
q dark blue suit a shaded blue collar
cite and shaded blue hat having the
same tones might be used. With a
gray suit an orange and white boa
and q straw color and white hat might
give . touch Of gayety.
Gunnison news-champion., 1908-07-24
"Ovi10e~ ee~cks.

II is now quite the fashion to DUB
all the good looking frocks that are
not intended for balls and dinners A
bridge frocks. The name is often mis-
used
Women who never play bridge wear
the frocks by that name. We used 10
say restaurant gown" and that name
was amusingly used by women who
rarely dined or supped out Of their
own houses.
The bridge frock, 30 called. il any
kind OF gown that you may wear to
a wedding. or an afternoon tea. or m
informal dinner. or a party, II you DO
not wear your gowns low at the neck.
The name has jumped into popular
ity. Just as the men who never
studied beyond the three RS wear col
lege bands around their hats and girls
who have never been On board a
Yacht wear the marine symbols on
their sleeves. SO women who do not
know king from ace speak familiarly
of their bridge" frocks.
Gunnison news-champion., 1908-07-24
Longer Skirts for Little e;e,s.

This fashion of putting little girls
into frocks that scarcely cover them
came into vogue last year. and liter.
ally deformed thin children who be,
came the victims Of it This year the
loose frocks are all about . full knee
in length, and some still longer. In
addition to the blouses and tunics
there are many apron. or pinafore
frock forms. \ supply of which will
keep the healthy romper looking fresh
at all hours Of the day. At . compare
lively small outlay of labor or money
-Harper's Bazaar.