The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-02-17
BY GEORGE ALLAN ENGLAND.

mean business, so I up an got right
 ready fer doin's. l felt certain they
 couldn't shoot inta the camp through the corrugated steel, leastways 'thout small
 cannon, which they didn't have in that
 pertic'lar army corps; ner could they
 burn it, nnther So I reckoned they'd
 tackle at night, when l was sleepn',
 rush the camp, tip it over an end
 things with a grand hooroosh, glorious
 an easy, with me at the bottom of the
 heap.
 ."rell you what. done some purty tall
 thinkin', mister. an l acted jes as fast
 as I thought. l rusled out my supplies,
 paved things over lively an fished up an
 old nduction-coil from the bottom O my
 lt-chest Then 1 cut out my battries
 from the cable circuit an wired the in-
 duction coil inta little private electro
 cution-ine O my own, which l grounded
 careful on the metal door-knob O the
 camp With six erow-foot batt'ries back
 O the coil. I cal-lated she'd take care O
 the door at least The winders at each
 end was O. K. fer shotgun defense. so
 that left only the blind back, toward tic
 mesleet. ta be considered, an I must admit that thar back gin me consd' bie
 at first how l was a-goin' ta prevent q rush from the thieket with subsequent tippin' s-over and a lively free-fer-all
 lynchin'-be as a grand finale 1 ed al-
 most hear the elods a-fallin on my six
 foot frame as I set thar thinin' an think in fit ta bust my skull, tryin ta figger
 out how I'd stan them greasers off night
 an day till the tug arrived from Domin-
 go-that is, sposn' it did arrivei
 Then inspiration bust in on me, an I
 let out most ungodly yell. l reckon the
 Dons heerd it. too, an took it fer a dyin' swan-song; anyway. they echoed it tri-
 umphant from their advanced position up ho rh n I r1ff m rat an
 sirree; jes' a plain American lineman,
 chock-full of inspiration, the same com
 pounded out-a common salt. batt'ry-acid , an a pinch O manganese dioxide.
 What did I do with that thar lay? Set still an listen an you'll find out First drilled an augur hole in the wooden | flooring at the back O the camp, run
 in some glass tubin an connected up little pipeline with some oldNrubber half
 inch hose that I'd been callatn' ta throw
 away for a long time, an handn't, as
 my prime luck w'd have it. Then I run the water out-a my crockry water-cooler, all but a couple O quarts or mebbe three, an hitehed the rubber tubin' ta
 the spigot. turned in a quart or so of
 sulphurc-batt'ry acid, y know-an'
 dumped in all the salt had
 eThe bullets began to rattle on the sides an roof like hail.
 'I didn't mind it no moren fy's bug zin though, but set tight an laid out a good bunch o manganese dioxide handy, snug ta the Hateful waiter cooler. hadn' t much nloren done it. nuther, when I'm Yummed if the meskeet out back didn't begin to rustle-then come a pause, a lit tie sscrapin' an jarrin' a word O com mand, an the ol' camp began ta creak, heave an hist up at the back, like a great big rat-trap bein' turned over, with | me fer the rat.
 "How many more dunn kinds-a animals am I a-goin' to be?' says I ta myself.
 Swan, snappin' turtle an rat-ain't that enough? Shell I set here an let them
 greasers make goat O me, too? I guess not Let science take her course! Let
 mind wrassle with matter an throw her. by Jimmy Cripes!
 with that I dumps the manganese inta the water cooler, slapes down the cover, an sets on it good and solid. A little | private hell tears loose inside ,an yaller- green chlorine gas comes spoutin' along l the pipeline in a tarnal hurry, now I'm a-goin' ta tell vel Did you ever smell ] any chlorine? Say Birthstone matches l is nothin but Eloridy water sides of it! 1 Even the leakage from my pipeline set
 me barkin' like all possessed, but out i sidei 1t surely sounded like whoopin' i cough in an orphan 'sylum. In leSsn
 minute cal'late the hull gang had got 1 enough; anyway heard retreatin' gasps,
 patterins. lung-spittin' coughs an cusses i intermingled. Then silence fell agin, an l Chapter Two was over, with an Amer
 cano still on top
 q let the stuff bile herself out an then l took peek up the beach from behin' the 1 shutter. All was clear round the camp,
 but the pweblo looked similar to tarna- l tion hornets nest-jes' swarmin', that
 all, an dunn sight maddern any nest
 ever see. That thar consid' ration mod- tod my mir q |
 on my, cot ta think it all over.
 Guess must-a dozed off when l wan 1 notcin, fer the next l knowed' twas 1 darks a wolf's mouth, boca de lobo, as i they call it down that, an 1 foud q
 been poundin' my ear like all possessed. l What woke me up, l caIlate, was the
 rattle O. like snakes hissin. Then
 heard feet--bare feet on bare ground
 and the door creaked a teeny little bit
 as some one tried the knob
 "In a second I was wide awake, you l betcha! Still as mouse-work I leaned
 off'n my cot, located the induction coil,
 An' threw the switch.
 "The night split open with yells. l "Diablo Mil infiernosll Madrie de l. Dios. 'Elpi 'Elp!l Oh Madre de Dios! Ayudeme Bendito!l Flip! 'Elp!
 "The coil was buzzin like bee l hive, dronin out the dance music fer ;, a lively double -shuff1e on the sand out l side. an don't ye doubt it! Suddenly ! they comes fresh yel1s in another voice, ! an more O that eloquent foreign cus- | sin. It's rally surprisn' the pull they is ta one O them high voltage alter
 natin' currents, also the painfullnc5s. 1 The chorus outside made me think a | good bit of two mad bobcats tryin' ta see which can holler leudest jes' 1 before closin in. Lots O bare feet
 scampered off irreg'lar in the dark, an l lots O profane voices died away in the distance I don't sabby much Spanish 1 talk. as I said before but l knowed enough that time to tell me they all thought the very old Nick was after | 'em They all scampered off hell bent an crooked, that is. all that could, an I was left alone with my ketch. A
 dun lively ketch it was, too, an don't ye doubt it--it made the door rattle like a good un, an kep' up one con tin'ous holler.
 After a bit I strikes a light with dew delib ration draws on my inc
 mans gloves an onlocl<s the door.
 "When I pulled it open, in come th alcaldy, who'd fairly growed onta that thar knob an along with him my or friend Benny de la Trinidad, both or 'em yalleFern' punkins-that' the way isthem feIlers has, in low latitoods, or turnin pale-an' both on 'em jumpin an twistin' like combination S'nt- Vitus-double- ssh uffe show. You ever heerd tell of anyone bein' electrlned! Well. that's what them two Dons was,