davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Fair play., 1908-12-19

There are three undertakers' signs
in different parts of the city which
have called forth both humorous com
ment and vigorous protest. The first
is of doubtful significance, and the
second brings natural fear of death
to the reader. while the last speaks of
the ceremony attendant at death in the
light of formal farce. The first sign
is 20 be seen in the northern part of
the city, and reads "A Step in the
Righ Direction One is at loss to
know whether this refers to death or
the course of the surviving relatives,
The second sign adveitises complete
funerals at reasonable rates. and CON
cludes "We have done it for others
and can do it for you" The last sign
advertises a hall, a minister of any
denomination and every requisite for a
modern and up-to-date burial.-Phila-
delphia Record.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
MUSINGS OF A CYNIC.

New l"'N lines
Admire woman and >hr will rerjp-
r''"''' at le'N' 10 the extent "i admir-
ihF your good taste,
Nhch woman believes everything
her husband tells her it, e pretty good
"'Eh 'l'N maven ! h"'h married long,
1t may he m"rr blessed To give than
10 receive h"' the men who hNr mp To
TIN, theory go into the hands OF Il rc-
Fair play., 1908-12-19

MATRIMONIAL CATECHlSM.
United Presbytrrian.
What is marriage 7
Marriage is an institution for the
blind.
Why do some people never marry 7
Because they do not believe in di-
vorce.
When man thinks seriously of
marriage, what happens
He remains single.
Should man marry a girl for her
money
No. But he should not let her be
an old maid just because she's rich.
When girl refers to a sad court
ship" what does she mean
She means that the man got away.
Is an engagement as good as mar
riagc
It's better.
In selecting a husband, why does a
girl prefer Il fat man
| Because fat man finds it hard to
stoop to anything low.
When asking papa, how should "a
young man act
/ He should face papa manfully and
never give him a chance at his back
When the minister says, "Do you
take this woman for better or for
worSe?" What does he mean?
The bridegroom's people construe it
one way, and the brides family inter
+ pref it another. 1t is very sad.
/ When a man says he can manage
hi, wife, what does he mean
. He means he can make her do what
she wants to.
When Il child is smart and good, to
whose family is it ducl
To it, mothers.
When child is bad and stupid, to
whose family is it due :
/ We refuse to answer.
Is 1t possible for married man to
be a fool without knowing it
Not if his wife is alive.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
The Rev. Iri X. Hicks Almanac

f"I 1909 ready Npy H., Iss, best c'ry sent
ont, beautiful c' we've ~ r"l'r-, dnc portraits uf
PROT liirk, "a colurs, all the old features and
several ucw one, La the book The best ustru-
uumtcpl year book and the only one containing
the original "liicks eahcr Forecasts " By
mail j1c, nn new, stands SOC. one copy nee
with WORD AND WORKS, the best ~ Month.
ly In America, Discounts on almanacs in
quantities. Agent, wanted. word and Work-
rub. Co, 1.nl Locust Street, 1T Louis, Mo
Every citizen owes II to himself. 10 his fellow,
and to rrol Hicks tp possess the Hicks
iurccasn the uuly reliable
Fair play., 1908-12-19
A Paying Investment.

Mr., John White of IS HighlandAve. -,
Houlton, Maine, says: Have been trou-
bled with cough every winter and
spring. Last winter | tried many al
vertiscd remedies. but the cough cou-
tinued until bought 50c. bottle of
Dr. Kings New Discovery; before that
was half gone the cough was all gone
This winter the same happy result has
followed few doses once more ban
ished the annual cough. an now
convinced that Dr. Kings New Dis
eoyery is the best of all cough and hung
remedirs.'' Sold under gnara ntee at I
dsag st,sss, DOE. ana sl.00. Trial
bo. zee,
Fair play., 1908-12-19
PERFECT CONFIDENCE.


Do you know how
10 dud quick relief from backachc
To correct distressing urinary Ills
To surely cure sick kidneys
Just one way,your nrighborS know
Have used Doan'S Kidney Pills
Have proved thcirworth in many tests
llcrc's Ste. Gencvicve testimony.
Mrs. VIM. Bergman, living one mile
southwest of Ste. Gcnevievc, Mo-.
says II have no reason to alter my
high opinion of Doan'S Kidney Pills
first expressed in the fall OF 1906 when
| gave public statement in their
favor. Prior to that time severe cold
settled on my kidneys and for long
while | could scarcely drag myself
about on account of the excruciating
pains through by back. also suffered
from headaches and my general health
was run down. | was steadily grow
ing worse instead of better when my
husband brought me box Of Dosn's
Kidney Pills, procured from Hinch aud
Douglas drug store and began taking
them according to directions. They
improved my general health and built
me up in every way
For sale by all dealers. Price Scots.
Foster-Mlburn co., Buffalo, New
York, sole agents for the United States.
Remember the name - Doan sand
take no other.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

Sometime ago, John d. Rockefeller
stated that the oil business was haz-
srdouS undertaking. As the report
the Standard Oil Company of In
d ma, filed III the last few days, shows
that ON capital Of one mi ion, that
company earned hfty-fyc million dol.
lars IN seven years, there is abundant
= oof that John D. knew what he was
talking about.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

kennedy's Laxative Cough Syr-
M not only heals irritation and
allays inflammation, thereby stop
ing the cough, but it moves the
bowels gently and in that way
drives the cold from the system.
Contains no opiates. 1t is pleas
ant to take, and children especial
IY like the taste, so nearly like
maple sugar. Sold by all drug
uIrt,
Fair play., 1908-12-19


DeWitt'S Kidney and Bladder
Pills are unequaIed in cases of
weak back, backache, inflamma-
tion of the bladder, rheumatic
pains, and all urinary disorders,
hey are antiseptic and act
promptly. Every case of kidney
or bladder trouble should be at
tended to ut once, and the aches
IN the back, rheumatic pains,
urinary disorders, ete., are warn
ing signs. Don't delay, for de
lays are dangerous. Get De-
Wits Kidney ana Bladder Pills.
Regular size soc. Sold by all
druggists.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
Business Woman Wanted

To act as Agent in selling our high
grade Dress Goods, Silks and Waist
ings which almost sell themselves.
We carry a large line of beautiful fab
rics and our prices are low and pat
terms exclusive. Any woman of aver
age ability can earn $500 or more
weekly handling our line. If you are
dissatisfied with present employment,
write us for particulars of our liberal
commission offer. No Capital re-
q,ired. Samples and sample case
FREE. Address Dept, 10 National
Dress Goods Co., 260 West Broad
way, Now York, n, Y.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
A Snre-enough knocker.

J C.. Goodwin of 2eidsville, n. O..
says: Bucklen 'sArnicaSalve is a sure
enough knochor Tor ulcers. y bad one
came on my leg last summer, but that
wonderful salve knocked II out in n
few rounds. Not even a scar remain
ed Guaranteed for piles. sores, burns
etc. 25 cents at all drug stores.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

W. X. Vanderbilt has abandoned
automobilng.
1T seems eccentric in these times ~
said Mr.. Vanderbilt at dinner in
New York, mot to motor" Every
body moters nowadays. Rich and
poor alike. we all have our cars. Mo
tor cars have become, like slippers or
hats, a necessity.
I'm fact" continued Nr. Wander
bit, II can almost believe the beg
gar story | heard yesterday.
"A beggar rang suburban door
bell, A mistress of the house ap.
pcared, frowned at the man, and
said
Go away, please. haven't got
any cold victuals, or old clothes, or old
boots, or old overcoats--'
Excuse me, ma am, the beggar
humGly interrupted, i don't want
nothin' to eat or wear. just called to
see, m1'am, if you had an old automo-
bile to give away"
Fair play., 1908-12-19

Governor Johnson of Mime ota
says that the Democratic leaders are
not east down by defeat that the par.
ty will win eventually. II further
ssowS that the party is in better con
dition than it was before the cam
psign opened. With proper organi-
cations, the Democracy can win
without organization, there is no op-
portunity.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
They Take The Kinks Out.

81 have used DIR. Kings New Life
Pills for many years, with increasing
satisfaction. They take the kinks out
of stomach, liver aud bowels, without
fuss or friction" says n. H. Brown of
Pittsiield, VT. Guaranteed satisfactory
at all drug stores. 25c.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
Farm for Sale.

900 acre Iarr in Perry Co., Mo : miles
i"m ferryvillr gn"'i gravel road from Perry
ville mp to house Catholic Church, store doc
tor school. nour mill. wagnnmnker 4 black
smtlh right at farm, l25 acres buttum laud aud
~ acres upland, ready Tor plcw. New . room
dwelling aud Two loom tenant house , large
osrns' spring house, peaches aud apples, white
ahd black OAK timber estimated TO he worth
s'o'"" ~ tons 81 hay, Is acres corn, Is head
sheep, Ssows, shonts, cows and calves all
Kinds of iarmng machinery aud one horse.
WIZ sell the whole tor 5000, part cash aud mart
on time. Possession at once.
JOHN HrRTEk,
Real Estate Agent, ste Geucvieye, Mo.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

Speaker Cannon says that the i'm
preston that the committee on rules,
rules the house, is entirely wrong. 1t
merely endeavors to ascertain what
the will of the mojority is, and it is a
coincidence that the will of the ma
iority is always what the committee
,.-,ilo
Fair play., 1908-12-19

+. J. NJ. Rhodes. a cousin of the no
torious Cecil Rhodes, who is now ten
anting hotter place than South
Africa, is predicting war between
England and Germany. If be has
any of the ignohle and brutal instincts
of his deceased relative, he no doubt
wishes it would come, in order that he
might profit financially thereby.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
Administrators Notice

\ulir' I- hereby r.y'u lutl lrltrT- oi aduiaIs-
itat"n uu the estate ui tdwiU }. ;ulIri, de-
rrr-'l. were granted fu fHu iuur'rs Eurd uu ll,
ION hyy ot b"C. l's~ hf tho Pruhtt" Count ui
ste. 6rucN lryc tuUujy. Missouri. Al p,'r SOUS
hay iH- claims rE1iu-l ~ull r-lltr are required To-
tNNluli them ipr allowance iu The admins traitor
WIIhIu enc year after the dHIo Of sutd letters. or
lhrN may 10" pru'WUrd Irum any benefit at such
estate "ri % such claims be- not CAhttdtvd
WllhIu lWp 'ralS from the ,iJtc ut thia publiCu-
non, they shall bee iutcyrr barred.
NM {. BONERlE,
Fair play., 1908-12-19

President Roosevelt did not spare
space on his last message. Ii occu.
pies some twenty-five columns of
wapapcr space, and in it ne took oc-
easicn to tell everything he knew and
few things he did not know so much
about
Fair play., 1908-12-19

A 50. Louis man is asking divorce
because his wife threw can of lob
sters at him. Had she thrown it at
the clock it would have been sure of
hitting him.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

And now Pat Grove has become an
evangelist. Men of his class are more
fitted for the penitentiory than they
are Tor the pulpit
Fair play., 1908-12-19
November %, 1908, three-inch
T. DRUGGISTS

NUVtIIDtT "a, IJUJ, Il three-inch
sleet covered the earth for several
days. On November II, 1906 a
two-inch snow fell and remained n
few days. So it will be seen TINT
we have had cold weather in No,
veinber before this year.
Fair play., 1908-12-19

Pleasant, sure, easy. safe little
liver Pills, are DcWitt's Little
Early RIscrs. They are easy to
take aud act gently All drug
gi>t sell aud recommend them.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
The Republican press is loud il

It's praises of the work of Chairman
pickey OF the Republican state
central committee. As a dispenser
oi hmd', he was more than ahogl-
ing success.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
SOUVENIR NOVELTIES

If you will mail us any photograph
we will copy it on one dozen souvenir
post cards and mail them to you for
go cents. Send for sample of our
souvenir post card wedding announce
ments, new novelty james W.
Jones & Co. Mt. Vernon. Mo.
Fair play., 1908-12-19
rs y. .I.s.vYs. PubiisI.er.

A Merry Christmas to all is the wash
of thc FAIR PLAY.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Ell Tempo, the church organ in
Mexico and consequently with a bit
of opposition to Diaz up its sleeve
at all times, figures that the United
States will take Lower California
from the southern Republic. It
might add Sonora. Both of these
states of Mexico ought to belong to
the United States. Sad error was
made in not extending surveys over
them at the time of requirement of
the balance of the southwest. How
ever, Ell TEMPO expresses unneces-
sary alarm at this time. 1t sounds
more like paving the way for the
future, unless the anti-foreign crowd
in opposition to the government have
a few revolutions planned for the
early delectation of foreigners in
Lower California and Sonora Such
program would bring about speedy
annexation. Attack on the property
of foreign interests and the lives of
representatives of these will make
loss of the northern tier of states of
Mexico a speedy result, for the rea-
son that Mexico would be unable to
restore order and safety there in the
event of serious trouble. The south
of the country would require all of
the attention and strength of the
military arm. Diaz is dealing with
an ungrateful people. His efforts in
their behalf has advanced them won
derfully and he will go down in his
tory as the greatest of nation build
ers of modern times. But his work
is not appreciated by the masses of
Mexico, which are hungering for
change, for license to do as they
please rather than for enlarged lib
critics, which they are not prepared
to assume responsibility of, and are
ready to fly at his throat at the first
opportunity. For their own good 1t
is to be hoped the opportunity will
never come about
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

to $4,000 people here. So we have
no need to run wild or to advance
glittering statements about new
things. If they make good We are
that much ahead II they fail, We
are none behind. The march of prog
ress Will have kept straight ahead in
the great copper camp of the world
and We will have retained the same
high standing that is now enjoyed.
Meantime it is up to us to encourage
research for the high values which
may be developed in the Granite dis
trict and those adjoining it along the
gold bearing formation with its
length of more than so miles north
from Ely City and to do all we can
within the bounds of honest and legi-
innate aid to help things along.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26
AGED GENERAL STOESSEL
BEGINS PRISON SENTENCE

ST. PETERSBURG, March "a
Lieutenant General Stoessel, who
yesterday began to serve 10 years
Imprisonment for cowardice and trea-
son in surrendering Port Arthur. oc-
cupies a room in the fortress of st.
Peter and st. Paul. adjoining that of
Rear Admiral Nebogatoff. who Is
serving a like sentence for surren-
dering TO the Japanese in the Sea of
Japan. The room is about 20 feet
square and overlooks little garden,
where the officers are permitted to
promenade. Stoessel's family has
received permission to furnish his
cell. The officers in the fortress run
private mess of their own, and to
this General Stoessel has been ad-
mitted.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Gold is not new to Ely district and
yellow metal has been mined here
since the earliest days of Neva1l'
history No reason why 1t should
not again come in prominence and
make for some of the biggest kin
of new supporting territory for the
reduction works, the railroads ani
the indust 'ial and commercial en,e' :
prises of this district.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Ely is bound to grow with the
balance of the district and will have
several thousand of the $4,000 to
$4,000 people who will be here in
the course of the next few years.
In sewer and sidewalk building the
town has reason to provide for those
to come as well as for the health of
those i now numbers in its popula-
ton All the money necessary to
make a fully adequate sewer service
for years to come should be prompts
ly voted by the taxpayers.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26
OUR GOLD EXCITEMENT.

Ely has a proud reputation in the
outside world as a stable, thoroughly
grounded and thoroughly reliable
camp In hooking it up with gold
excitements in nearby territory, terri
tory which is tributary and from the
commercial standpoint part and par
eel of the district. care must be
taken. Ely cannot afford to have her
high standing for reliability smirched
in the least by being made RESPONSE
BILE for wild enthusiasm which is
likely to accompany any boom move
ment, even though recklessness with
the truth might bring a rush here
and result In considerable increase in
circulation of the coin of the realm.
Such gain as might result would be
sadly temporary, bringing about loss
in the end that 1t would take years
to overcome.
Granite district is undoubtedly
giving occasion for a great deal of
enthusiasm and may under the de-
velopment that is coming about prove
to be a wonder which will add mill
lions to the money already invested
here and thousands to the working
population, but this remains to be
seen. Meanwhile Ely district is
abundantly able to paddle its own
canoe ON the strength of enormous
wealth she has in developed copper
ores, great reduction plants nearing
completion, which will soon draw
the bulk of the ore production of the
state here for treatment and in the
enormous advantages she has in
many other ways, entirely independ-
ent of new discoveries of minerals
Cumberland Ely and Nevada Consol-
idated alone have enough in demon
strated resources to make good all
that the above implies and to de-
termine a population of from 10000
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

A sewer and sidewalks, Ely I'M
questionably needs and needs badly.
Bond issues for these, if the
necessary money is not obtainable
otherwise, should be made promptly
and in any amount that may be re-
quired to get first class jobs, even If
1t puts load on the necks of Ely
taxpayers.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Ely in building sidewalks can do
no better than to pattern after the
splendid concrete walks that have
been pct down in Ely City and which
have been demonstrated to be
splendidly adapted to local climatic
conditions. No better walks are to
be found in the west While about
1t the property owners of Ely might
as well provide substantially and
creditably, even though first cost will
be higher.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Speaker Cannon now threatens to
force congress to get to work when
ever bill of which he disapproves
makes its appearance, and the effect
Is instantaneous.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Real estate has the call on local
dollars just now. Be among the
wise and get in early and often where
your judgment tells you there is
show for the longest life and the
largest activity.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

While the government is keeping
watca on Emma Goldman 1t would
be a good idea to go little futher
and fix her clock by sending her back
across the waters.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

The present bull movement In the
east looks as If 1t had substantial
backing in continued reports of in
creased activity throughout the
country.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Andrew Carnegie has shown his
gratitude to the daughter of a man
who helped him when he was poor
boy. and he did not give her library,
either.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

The first consignment of Easter
bonnets has arrived from Europe,
and the head of the house is about
due to cut down his cigar bill and
prepare for trouble.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Admiral Cowles has the idea that
getting the drop on the other fellow
Is about half the battle, and If the
other fellow drops quickly enough
that is the other half.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

State police have shown their hand
at Rawhide. The squatters have
been moved. One excellent step to
the good at any rate.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

The strain evidently told on the
nerves of both Meyer and Pettibone.
The gentlemen are both making re-
covery, however, In a California hos
pital.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Nevada Consolidated is booming
according to yesterdays wires. Such
gain as 1t makes it is entitled to on
merit.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

City government is always self
long as the bond is
suing lower Is not annulled.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Taft is too big to be pushed around
at will from peg to peg "a hours a
day.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

The News prints all the news of
this district, and prints it correctly.
The White Pine news. [volume] (Ely, Nev.) 1906-1910, 1908-03-26

Advertising rates made known on
application.
The San Francisco call., 1908-11-07
JUDGE TELLS OF FLEETS
RECEPTION BY JAPAN
Former Consul at Yokohama
Says Talk of Friction Has
Been. Modified

Judge n. w. McIvor. formerly Ameri-
can consul at Yokohama, was a pas
senger on the steamship Hongkong
Maru arriving from the orient yester-
day.
Judge McIvor has lived in the orient
for the last 20 years. and at the pres
ent time, having retired from consular
work, is practicing his profession IN
Japan, where he represents a number
of large American corporations.
Since the arrival OF the fleet at jap
anese ports the general talk of fric-
been greatly modified. I was in Yoko-
hama and Tokyo during the visit of
the fleet. The reception given the
Americans was wonderful and en-
thusiastic outpouring of the people.
Japan has had a hard struggle to
cabinet assumed its duties the ooun-
try has received much support from
foreign capitalists.
The feeling of the Japanese toward
this country should not be judged by
the upper classes or by the lower
is now known in Japan as the middle
class are the wise thinkers. and they
have a great regard for America and
American ideals. IT is through this
large element of the people that the
social relations between the two coun-
tries will be placed upon firm foot
ing"
Judge McIvor is visiting this coun-
try on personal business. He is ac-
companied by his two daughters. His
wife and his son are in Yokohama.
He will place his daughters in an east
ington and New York he will return
to the orient
The San Francisco call., 1908-11-07
URGE PEOPLE TO BUY
MATERIALS AT HOME
Manufacturers and Producers
Association Appeals to
San FranciscauS

The manufacturers and producers
association has sent out a general ap-
peal requesting the people of San Fran
cisco to patronize home industries. The
example of Chicago is cited. where this
policy was successful in building up the
city after the big fire. Attention is
called to the fact that the local manu-
facturers- have equipped their estab-
lishments with all the material neces-
sary for new construction. A letter sent
out by the association says In part:
Unfortunately, some have been and
still continue to obtain building mate
riais outside this state, which might be
had here at approximately If not the
same price. 1t is apparent to all that IL
the money expended could be kept here
vital Importance to us now. To rebuild
a city capital is required. and much of
1t comes from outside sources, but If
that money is kept here only a few
days and then is sent abroad for build
ing material it has not given us its full
benefit Many contracts have during
the past two years been given to east
ern manufacturers which could have
been kept here.
What We require chiefly is work for
our people. Our manufacturers must
have business to give them work. When
workmen are employed they have the
means to provide themselves with not
only the necessities of life. but many
of the Injuries. which they would pur-
chase in San Francisco. This would be
a great stimulus to business and would
add to the general prosperity"