The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1908-02-13

y"
After ALL" remarked the Bachelor
Girl, thoughtfully jingling the latchkey
in her pocket, "matrimony Is being
wonderfully %mitigated by modern in
ventions, isn't it? Here's an advertise
ment in this mornings paper of a self
rocking cradle, and another of a self
cooking range and -
And, now,' exclaimed the Mere
Man cynically. "if we could only discov-
er a s~elf-arnusing husband
There are plenty Of those, Mr.. Por-
teri"
And a s~elf-raising child
How perfectly lovely!"
And a SELF paying expense &C
count
The Bachelor Girl clasped her hands
with delight.
sit down." she cried. making room
beside her on the studio divan. Il like
your mood today. Mr.. Porter"
The Mere Mans cynicism dissolved
beneath her smile as the clouds beneath
the sun.
OF course" he said sympathetically.
as he sank gratefully into the proffered
seat, its rather hard on you women"
Hard on u.s." The Bachelor Girl
dropped her newspaper with a tinkle
of silver bangles.
"This taking your job out OF your
hands" explained the Mere Man. "out
Of the hands" he added with q sigh.
that once rocked the cradle and ruled
the world!"
They never did," retorted the Bach
elor Girl promptly. least. not the
same hands, and she picked up her
brushes and slipped on her studio apron
with a shrug of the shoulders. That's
a misleading old proverb," she contin-
ued, leaning over to put the finishing
touch on the halo of a pink n purple
Madonna, invented in order to de-
ceive us into keeping our hands out
of masculine affairs. The hands that
rule the world. and always have ruled
1t, are the ones that wear diamonds
and No. 5 gloves, and polish their nails
and are put in cold cream overnight and
dipped in rosewater every morning.
You never heard of Queen Elizabeth,
or Madame Pompadour. or Cleopatra,
or Joan Of Arc, or Nell Gwynne. or
Boadicea, or Helen of Troy. or Luz
cretzia Borgta, or any woman who ever
influenced a country Or a king, rock
ing a cradle, did you? If they had
rocke cradles you wouldn't have heard
of them at ALL" and she put a fine line
around the halo with a confident sweep
of her brush.
Obi" The Mere Man cleared his
throat desperately: IF you mean that
men are occasionally beguiled by an un-
sexed. unnatural. dangerous creature
of that kind"
L mean that they always are" re-
Joined the Bachelor Girt decisively. IF
they weren't" and she laughed softly.
that kind wouldn't be dangerous.
And" she added, pushing back her
bangles and squirting thSughtfuily at
the halo, "if it should come to a choice
between being called n dangerous
creature Or dubbed a domestic trump
nine women out Of 10 would break all
the cradles to pieces and fling them into
the fire"
II do believe they would" exclaimed
the Mere Man with conviction.
But they don't have TO-" retorted
the Bachelor Girl cheeFfully. Thanks
to the incubator. and the se1f-rocking.
cradle, and the French nurse, and the
beauty specialist, a woman nowadays
can be as dangerous as Gree OF Medu-
sa and still manage to be Some sort
OF wife II mother"
Yes agreed the Mere Man, wryly.
but what sort Of wife ana mother? 90
The very latest pateMt," returned
the Bachelor Girl, with a triumphant
wave Of her brush. TIE ready1nade
sort--warranted to fit any kind of DO
mestic OF social Situation. The sort
thai you find everywhere in society,
and apartment hotels and areund bar
gain counters and all weren's cIuhAs
And II she isn't exactly what your
youthful fancy painted, you must re-
member that it's your own fai1lt that
h is what she is. If she hadn't dis
covered that, while the hand that rock
ed the cradle was getting %caiteuset ar
the inside and krotty ON the knuches.
you We're off kissing the hand that Wars
diamonds and had time to kees, ITSELF
I~nantcured, she would stfi1 be bissfuIy
imagining that the nursery .rntkins
chair was the throne seat. It toek q
long time and many shocks to wake us
out of that peaceful dream"
"Shocks!" The Mere Man looked as
II he had at that received n
The Bachelor Girl turned and re-
garded him loftily.
Don't you suppose she inquired In
a patronizing tone. that 1t was a shock
to the Roman matrons to discover that
a soul of honor like Marc Antony couId
see anything in a snake-ltke creature
with an Egyptian nose ana rings ON
her toes and no reputation to aneak
of? And don't you suppose that it's
a new shock every time We fun out
that some masculine paragoa who has
been writing or preaching about the
s~acredness Of the American home or
painting madonnas has gona off and
gotten himself tangled up with a Ciree
and overturned all our theories? The
trouble is" and she turned back to hsi
easel once more, that a MAN always
has wanted a Madonna and circe
mixed. Deltlah n :. Gretchen worked
into one. And at last we've discovered
how to give it to him We've, found
out that we can keep the domestic ma
chinery running and, at the same time
marcel the hair. by rocking the cradle
by proxy, and living in apartment ho-
tells n buying the children's clothes
ready made. and ptnning cur faith I'd
bachelors buttons and hole-proot
socks. But 1t isn't much fun" and
the Bachelor Girl sighed, there /.
nothing on earth" she continued, sadly;
that tho average woman enjoys NOPE
than doing her own homework and
making baby clothes, and embroidfns
! pillows, and curling a haby's hair: but
she has found out that it doesn't pay:
and that while she Is cutting out rat
terms and making bibs some other
! woman is cutting her out OF a husband
and making trouble"
Ard so h cuts out the whole thing
added tie Mere Mar cynicaily. and
makes up as q houri. I've noticed tina
nowadays every woman wants to be a
subtle siren. and that you can't tell a
! mother of nine children under a ~ci,iffon
veil and n mushroom hat frern q rirj
of ~. But it's hard on the children
oh, ] don't know The RarhAIar
Girl Tilted her chin t~Ieuehtf1I,Iyr
"REadynlade children are usually ,n,,cL