The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1908-05-24
The Four Flus hing Of Doc

buy bull pup. I might have got him,
too, if il hadn't been for Doc Pinp-
noodle; but, seem the way things
surned out. don't bear no grudge. 1t
was the Doc I met first. I'd seen him
driftin' up and down the stairs once or
twice. but didn't pipe him off special.
There's too many freaks around For
ty-second street to keep cases on all of
EN-
But one day about a month ago l was
sittin' i'm the front office here, gettin'
the oarache from hearing Swiftly Joe
tell about what he meant To do 10
Cans that last time when the door
swings open So hard it most takes the
hinges of, and we sees a streak OF
arms and legs and. tail hat making a
dive under the bed couch in the corner.
They've most got the range, Swiftly"
says /. Two feet 10 the left and you'd
been bulrs-eye. What you got your
mouth open so wide for? Coin to try
To catch the next one in your teeth?"
Swiftly didn't have time to uncOrk any
I@partee before some one struck the
landing outside like they'd come down
a flight of foldin' steps feet first, and
pc flowers in her hat hobs in and
squints once at each of US. Say, / don't
want to be looked at often like that! 1t
felt like bein' sampled with a cheese
tester
Did Montgomery Smith just come
IN here?' says she Did he? Don't lie,
8sw, Where is he?" and the way she
jsrked them little black eyes around
was enough to tear holes in the mat
ting.
Lady" says /
Don't lady me. Mr.. Fresh" says
she, THROWN the gimlets my way
And tell that brOken-nosed child
stealer over there 10 take that monkey
grin off'm his face or I'll scratch his
eyes out"
'Huny chez" yells Swiftly, THROWN
a back somersault through the gym.
door and snappin' the lock.
Anything more. miss?" says I.
Were here to please"
Humph!" says she. It'd take some
thin better than you To please me-"
Glad / was born lucky" thinks l,
but | thought it under my breath.
rs my Monty hiding in that room?"
says she. jabbin' finger at the gym.
Gross my heart, he amt" says l.
81 don't believe you could think quick
enough TO lie" says she, and with that
she fiips out about as fast as she came
IN.
I didn't stir until I hears her hit the
lower hall Then l bolts the door, goes
and calls Swity down off the top of the
swingin' rope, and we comes 10 a pa
rade rest alongside the couch.
Monty, dear Monty" says I, 'the
cyclones passed out 10 sea. Come, out
and give up your rain check"
He backs out feet first, climbs up on
F,fc ,1,f
hands for minute, while ne gets over
the worst of the shock. Say, at first
sight he want man you'd think any
woman would lose her breath tryin' to
-catch, less'n she was his landlady, and
that was what figures out that this fe-
male peace disturber was.
Monty might have been a winner
once, but IL was a long spell back
Just then he was some out of repair.
He had a head big enough for a col
Iage professor, and a crop OF hair like
Gh herb doctor. but his eyes were puffy
underneath. and you could see by the
cafe au lait tint TO his face that his
fver'd been on a long strike. He was
fairly thick through the middle but his
legs didn't match the rest of him. They
were too thin and too short.
IF I'd known you was comm, I'd had
the scrub lady dust under there" saws
l. l.
pie OF weeks"
He makes a stab ut sayin' something
but his breath hadn't come back yet
He revives enough, though, TO take a
look at his clothes. Then he works his
silk dicer up off'm his ears, and has a
peek at that. 1t was a punky lid all
right. but it had saved a lot OF wear
and tear on his cocoa when he made
that slide for home plate and struck the
wall.
WAS this a long-distance run. or
. just hundred-yard sprint?" says l.
Never mind. II 1T comes hard. I don't
blame you bit for side-steppin' a
heart-to-heart talk with any such
rough-and-ready converser as your
friend. I'd do the same myself"
he looks up kind of grateful at that
and sticks out a soft, lady-like paw
for me to shake. Say. that wasn't such
a slow play, either! He was too groggy
10 say word, but he comes pretty near
winnin' me right there. I sets Swiftly
TO work on him with a whisk broom.
hands out a glass Of ice water, and In
minute or so his voice comes back.
Oh, yes, he had one. II was a little
shaNy, but, barrin' that, il was as
smooth as mayOnnaise. And languagei
Why, just teilin' me how much Obliged
he was. he near stood the dictionary
on its head. There want TO doubt of
his warm feeHn' for me by the time he
was through. 1t was almost like bein'
adopted by q rich uncle.
'Oh, that's all right" SAYS I. 'You
can use that couch any time the dis
appearin fit comes on. She was hot "a
the trail. eh. Monty?"
1T was all a painful absurd error"
says he, "a mistake in identity. I pre-
sumo. Permit me to make myself
krown 70 YOU" and he shoves out his
card.
Rasmuln Pinphoodle, ]. r. D.-that
was the way IL read,
Long ways from Smith. amt it?"
says l. THE first Of it sounds like a
Persian rug"
my Hindu birth name" says he.
I'D have bet you want a domestic
filler" says !. THE Pinphoodle is En-
glish, amt it?"
He smiles like I'd asked him to split
q pint with me, and says that il was.
But the tag on the end-J. r. D.
] passes up" says I. Don't stand for
Judge OF Rent Dodgers, does it,"