The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-07-07
DENVER JAGS EASY TO GET
Denver Correspondent to Chicago ri bune

Denver Correspondent to Chicago Tri-
 bune.
 LUST what effect altitude has on n0I alcohol and just what effect alti- " tude and alcohol together have on democrats is to be determined posi- lively and finally within the next few days. It has been given out semi-official- ly that on certain temperaments the ef- feet of one glass of greg at Denver's 5000 feet above the sea level is that of four glasses of grog on Chicago datum.
 Research on this important problem was begun last week by few scientists who have said themselves that there is something in the theory, but who do not propose to reach any nasty conclusions.
 Other scientists are arriving by every train. and the investigation will be con timed. It is intended that the inquiry shall be exhaustive and the inquirers propose to get to the bottom of the mat fer. After mature deliberation the re- suits of the research will be made pub lie.
 One democratic statesman, who has scientific interest in the subject, is re- ported now as being 26 highballs above sea level. On previous occasions, when he conducted experiments in Chicago, he never knew himself to reach more than eight highballs above datum.
 Part of his own personal altitude. he frankly attributes to pleasing mixture of bourbon and ginger ale. The rest Of it, he asserts, is an atmospheric souse which he contracted by sleeping next to an open window. everything good in Denver is attributed to the climate; everything bad to the altitude.
 He is endeavoring to descend enough 10 be able to compute the relation between his altitude of 26 highballs and Denver's altitude of 5000 feet. He has theory that if he subtracts his ordinary Chicago altitude of eight from his unexpected and surnrising Denver altitude of 26 he will he getting somewhere near solution or the matter
 At present he is handicapped by an in- ability to come down far enough to 'hg- ger, accurately, but he Is preserving his data, and, If he can do nothing petter' will carry it back home with him. That he will finish his reckoning and be able to announce to the world just how much of an unfair advantage alcohol and alti- tude take of a man.
 This particular democratic statesman with an interest in scientific subjects is thoroughly convinced that morality is a matter of geography. If at the present moment he were in Chicago and had been no more indiscreet than he has been here he would be no further ad- vanced than a state of mild conviviapty.
 Just because he is in Denver he fnds himself badly pickled, and every time he takes a breath of air he feels as If he had been talking to the bartender} again. If John M. Roach has one Of those old compressed air motors he used to run for owl car service on North Clark street and will fill 1t up and ship it here this scientist may make it possible to reduce his altitude. If this be impossible he and Pike's Peak are likely to continue in autitpdinous rivalry.
 This probably is the most exhaustive investigation which has been made thus far. the investigator being thoroughly equipped to get all the facts, even if un- able to draw deductions from them.
 It has been explained that democrat or any other person-ascending to Den- ver's 5000 feet above sea level takes into his system 20 per cent less oxygen at a breath than he Is accustomed to get at a ration if he live by the sounding sea or on the prairies.
 Apparently this. establishes relation between alcohol land oxygen, and this subject will be investigated. The arriv- ing democrats are a hardy race of ex- plorers They are willing to take alpen- stock and go out climing at once and to stay climbing. There will be no secrets about this altitude, oxygen and alcohol nroblem when the convention Is over.
 scientist who has been only mod erately active reports that his experi- n,ents lead him to believe that there is no annreciable effect on the feet, which seemed to get no further from sea level than they should. but that his head be-
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