davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.

From the Philadelphia Record.J
Burying the Ratchet often means
war to the knife.
The better we know people the less
politeness we waste on them.
Never try to make a man feel at
home If you know him to be hem
pecked-
The woman with one child has more
theories concerning children than the
mother Of ten.
Some people are not satisfied to kill
two birds with one stone, but they
want the stone back.
Miss Gotrox-"He's a man after my
own heart" Miss Caustique-sAre
you sure he isn't after your money
instead?"
Hoax-"You used to work in the
postoffice, didn't your" Joax-"Yes,
that's my old stamping ground
Mrs. Buggins-"I got this ball gown
at a ridiculous bargain; 1t was one
third off," Mr.. Buggins-"One-thir
off the top, suppose
Nell-"Maude Is awfu1ly dfsaerea-
able; she can sing and won't" Belle
"She's not half SO disagreeable as the
girls who can't sing and will"
Where there's smoke there must be
fire." quoted the Wise Guy. "It'e.
hard to believe that when you are try
ing to light the furnace fire." added
the Simple Mug.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
GLOBE SIGHTS,

[From the Atchison Globe.l
Much of the good advice you hear
is rank nonsense.
Every man is a suicide: he has some
habit that is shortening his life.
A lazy mans ambition is nearly al
ways directed toward some political
graft.
Being willing is not everything: it's
the doing something to help that
counts.
The man who is popular with a
great number of women makes the
poorest husband.
No man always knows when he is
acting the fool, but he usually has
funny feeling in him that suggests
What has become of the old fash
Toned woman who fed her family
"sassafras" tea this time of year?
If a man is honest enough to admit
the truth about himself, that should
be enough, without asking him to
tell it.
Some of the new spring styles in
hats seem to have been derived from
the working headgear of the f1re de-
partment.
Whenever Father is mentioned, the
girls in the family wonder why Mother
doesn't apologize for bringing him
! into the family. And sometimes she
does.
Before the oldest girl in the family
his crown lettering. and by the time
| she is eighteen he hasn't enough DOW
er left to order a favorite old picture
| left on the parlor wall.
Nearly every boy worries a good
| deal for fear he will commit some
| depreciation which will cause him to
| be fined. And If you were as hard up
! financially as the average boy. Won
might do some worrying for the same
| reason.
! We formerly welcomed the coming
of spring, but we are afraid of it now
| owing to the piano playing we hear
as soon as door and windows are open
| for the summer. Ever occur to You
how many nuisances there are in every
neighborhood? And how helpless the
| people arei
| There Is no enjoyment in imposing
| on others. You may think it a great
pleasure for while to receive favors
from others. but the time will come
when you will change your mind. II
| is equally true that there Is no enioy-
ment in being imposed upon by others.
| there is very little enjoyment in anv.
thing, as a matter of fact.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
AYHAWKER OTS

Mr.. -Og of Ell Dorado now finds him.
self tied with Mr.. Elk of Marquette for
the shortest name in the state.
Olive Van Tuyl, a Leavenworth
girl, aged 16, died of ptomaine pois-
oning after refreshing herself with a
deviled ham sandwich.
It is reported by the ever truthful
Globe that an Atchison divorced man
who is soon to be married has invit-
ed his first wife to the wedding.
Wichita is certain that summer has
arrived. Boys are running around in
their bare feet and some are wearing
straw hats. The arrival of houseflies
is also noted.
Chelsea, the oldest town in Butler
only stock of goods in the town will
be moved away and the building will
be occupied as residence.
A Leavenworth schoolboy who OBJ
jected to being teased by his compan-
ions got the family gun and shot a
we'll was seriously wounded.
Parsons claims to distinction on ac-
count of the possession of an opium
den are quickly moved down by Law
renee. which remarks in an off-hand
way that she had two. a month ago.
The school superintendent of Cow
ley county being a lady, should have
for another term. She can petition
the men in leap year without any
improperly.
A Humboldt man recently conduct
ed fourteen checker games at one
time, at lola. He won six and lost
eight, but the result Is explained on
the theory that there were many
things In lola to prevent his keeping
his mind on the game.
An ordinance to prevent Illicit sales
of liquor in drug stores was killed in
the Wichita council Monday night by
vote of six to five. Wichita has re-
form mewhat--but the council
men decided the ordinance in question
was carrying fanaticism to an ex-
treme."
Hopeful item from the South Hav-
en- News: "One of our farmers told US
this week that he had no fears of the
green bug this year. He says no in
sect was ever known to destroy a
wheat crop two years in succession,
and we don't know but what he Is
about right
Frank Heuitt and Laura Mason ran
away from Salina and were married
in Abilene. They proposed to live
happy ever after. But the authori-
ties are butting in. They insinuate
that some perjury was committed in
stating the girls age, and the young
couples honeymoon is apt to be a
failure.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
THE PENSION ROLL.

There seems to be we'll defined
movement under way to enlarge the
federal pension roll and to counteract
any natural decrease In the govern
ment's outlay for obligations incurred
to volunteers of the Civil, Mexican,
Indian and Spanish wars. The expan-
sion of pension expenditures caused by
the dependent pension law of 1890 and
the legislation constituting and supple
menting it has been halted by the OPP
GRAFTON of natural causes That is to
say, the supply of claimants made eligi-
BILE by the dependent pension act and
the acts amending it has now been vir-
tually exhausted and the annual sub
fractions from the roll more than equal
the additions to it. The government
disbursed for pensions in 1SSs-'90-the
last year under the old system-$106,-
100000. The new claims approved in
the three years following, with the ar
rearages granted, forced the expendi-
ture for 1928 up to $156, 90S, 0Oo That
was the largest sum ever paid out in
one year through the pension bureau
In 1878 the outlay was s144 ,651, 900.
But for the other years up to 190s-O7
the average has been a little under
$140, GOO, 000.
To all appearances the pension roll
had attained it's utmost limit and was
destined to shrink-at first gradually
and then rapidly-to the dimensions it
had reached before the adoption of the
dependency, age and service tests, in
addition to the normal test of disability.
| Executive orders had declared the at
tainment of certain age presumptive
proof of a degree of disability common
| ly encountered at that age, and the
McCumber law of 1907 both rearranged
the degrees of presumptive disability
! and increased the monthly rates allow
! ed for them. All this legislation dealt
with persons already eligible to pen
| sions under the theory of the depend
| ent pension law. 1t drew for recruits
on the unknown army" created by the
| law of 1890 and merely facilitated the
| exhaustion of that army. The normal
decline in pension payments was
| checked by allowing new claims and
increasing the average values of the
| pensions drawn or certain to be drawn
| but the supply of eligibles was never
increased by the various adjustments
| and reclassifications.
| The pension bills now pending in con-
| gress at this session have been drawn
on different theory. One of them
| which both houses have passed, does
follow to some extent the precedent sci
by the McCumber act of last year by
increasing the pensions allowed to wild.
| ows and minor children of soldiers and
| sailors of the Civil, Mexican and In.
| dian wars. from IS to s12 a month. Blu
it also admits to the pension list some
3S, 900 widows not previously eligible
The enactment of the widows bill viii
entail an additional expenditure O.
$1,000, 600 and will probably carry tn,
governments annual outlay for pen
sions in 1908-'09 or 1e09-'10 beyond tn,
record breaking total of 1928. Tw,
other bills which apparently have n,
chance of passage. and which it woult
be decidedly inopportune to pass now
aim at creating entirely new classes o
pensioners. The first provides for put
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

railroads asking you to use your in.
huence to kill certain bills would be
ammunition if they fell into the hands
OF the enemy. And you seem to have
done something for certain trust for
which they write you that you will find
STOCK fnclosed, and you appear to have
acquired $4,000 acres of government land
In rather mysterious manner. There's
'whack.' Is 'whack' something like sad-
uitfon, division and silence?"
The Hon. Tom hitched uneasily on
his chair and grunted some more
Then l found shares in three or four
corporations-an agreement. about q
mine-a copy Of letter from you stat
ing that a certain bill would be killed
In committee, and various other inter-
esting things. I couldn't sleep nights
IL thought that Mr. Ellington might
get hold of this evidence of your 10y
atty to your party and country"
"Humph!" grunted the Hon. Tom. as
several files that had been buzzine
around the room suddenly lit on him.
And one thing more. daddy. This Is
In strict confidence. The editor Of the
Argus is on the snoop. He says you
are with the coal roads and down on
all investigations..a and that you've made
You see. daddy. il he should get
hold
What do yer want7" interrupted
the father as he brushed at the flies.
w n.y. We WANT your consent. L
think that will keep Mr.. Clayton OF
the stump. think It will"
What else?'
''And then I think you might draw
me check for at least $1,000. It was
worth that to learn the game of poll
tics. You can fix 1t, can't you, so that
it will come out Of what they call the
yellow dog fund.-" /
"Darned IL don'ti' replied the hon.
orable, as he drew his checkbook tow
ard him. He owned the Fourth con-
gressional district, but he knew when
he was a licked man.
And about politics?" asked Jennie
when she had received her check. Shall
I study them any more?'
Cuff! I used to think that If the
question of woman's rights came up In
the house I'd vote in the affirmative.
but now TIL be hanged If I do!''
And then he smiled grimly and put
| on his hat and went out to make all
| necessary arrangements to bury the
1 ambitious Mr.. Ellington so deep that
| the seventh generation of American
patriots couldn't find his political skel-
eton.-(Copyrighted 1908, by the Asso-
| ciated Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
LFrom the Chicago News.J

IFrom the Chicago News.J r.
A rolling stone beats two In the
bush.
The polished speaker can't always
see his finish.
A man may be dead easy all his life
and yet die hard.
When a judge lays down the law he
doesn't necessarily resign.
The rolling mill gathers no moss
unless there is a strike on.
If there were no fools in the world
lawyers would die of starvation
If the toothache doesn't WORRY q
man it's because some other fellow
has It.
But the neighbors of a self-satfsf,ed
man are not always satisfied with him
How many men do you know who
let their religion interfere with thetr
business?
No man ever comes halfway I'M 70
the expectations his mother had ~
him when he was boy.
It's remarkable how easily girl
can adjust herself to circumsta NO..
She can be fond of almost any voI,n.
man when there are no others around
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Mayor Green is to be commended for
the stand he has taken in insisting that
the gas meter shall be tested by the city
and with testing apparatus of its own.
Gas meters are tickle things and it will
be remembered that a recent inspection
of thousands of them in New York city
revealed the fact that more than half of
them ran fifty per cent fast and that
some were found which operated one
hundred and fifty per cent too fast
Many a gas consumer in Topeka be-
lieves that he is afflicted with rapid
gated meter.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
OCEAN TO OCEAN RAILWAY.

In securing control of the Illinois
Central on the one hand, and the
Georgia Central on the other, E. H.
Hartman has accomplished a task
that will enable him to run trains
from Savannah, Ca. on the Atlantic
coast to New Orleans on the Gulf
and thence via the Southern Pacific to
the various points it reaches in Cali
fornia. and to Portland, Ore, and in
termediate places by the Union Pa
cific railroad.
The Central of Georgia connects at
Birmingham, Ala, with the Central
Of Illinois The latter connects with
the Southern Pacific at New Orleans
and with the Union Pacific at Omaha,
Neb. So that the Hartman lines now
cross the continent from sea to sea
and run from the Great Lakes to the
Gulf. And though Savannah is not
New York there is an Importance in
the through connection 1T affords
that it is not to be belittled.
Though the names of the different
roads under his contro1 may rema in
unchanged, the operation of all will
no doubt be unified or co-or6inated
as soon as possible. So that, in point
of fact, Mr.. Hartman is the first to
establish a railroad line from ocean
to ocean, although others have been
trying to do so for some years past.
In a sense, it is a great public
work. For, if the consolidation, so to
speak, Of all of the companies In
volved in the transaction pays the one
resulting from it, that can only be
because it affords am accommodation
to the public which was really
needed.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

It ought not to take long for the aver
age business man to arrive at the con-
clusion that a big county fair here this
fall will be OF inestimable benefit to
the business interests Of the city. And
It ought to take him less time to write
out a substantial check as his share of
the sl2 900 fund which is needed to start
the fair with. Money contributed to
this fund will be a good investment
and now is the time to subscribe. 1t
can be done today as we'll as tomorrow
and the sooner the fund is raised the
better 1t will be for the fair.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
JOURNAL ENTRIES

An animal tanner and not COVER
ness is needed for some children.
X X X
When you get right down to bottom
facts 1t Is money that makes the auto
mobile go.
x X
The man who was born rich and
never was broke doesn't know whether
he has any real friends or not.
X X
Fellows who pride themselves on be-
ing men Of push do not seem overly
anxious to exercise it on a baby car
riage.
X X X
It's only the theoretical mothers who
attend congresses. The practical ones
with a family of six or more have to
stay home to attend to them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
[From the New York Pre.a,

Iron the New York Press1
When a man is never fooled nv a 81,
it's because he simply isn't worth IL
A woman can like most anv nova, q.
it couldn't have happened in real lie
A good thing about money ia ~
temptations you escape by not bsvs
ing 1t.
The more vanity a man has ana ~.
less self-respect. the better his cbae,s
to get along in politics.
II girl won't forgive you for kiss
ing her against her Will It's hera,s
you don't know how to do it. 1se
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
FRON OTHER PENS
THE ATTACK ON coRTELYoU.

THE ATTACK ON CORTELYOU-
It is a very narrow and unpatriotic
partisanship that seeks to discredit
| the secretary of the treasury for his
efforts to alleviate the recent panic.
The ignorant diatribes of populistic
agitators might be disregarded. though
it is astonishing to hear them echoed
by speakers and writers assuming to
represent civilized communities, who
must understand their falsity. But
when responsible men like some OF the
Democratic leaders in congress
men as Senator Cui dsa,a FOR e1v
upon the old, unreasoning prejudice
against banks and the mischlevous I'M
friendliness of west and south against
the east, sincere Americans can not
protest too emphaticaliy.
Secretary Cortelyou has given per-
fectly plain report of all the treasury
operations during the currency crisis,
which satisfies every candid mind that
in a situation of peculiar dlfneulty ne
acted with great discretion and with
degree of success that undoubtedly
saved the country from Overwhelming
disaster. He was called on to admin
lister a wholly artificial system, for
which neither he nor any of his prede-
cessors in the department was re-
sponsible, under which vast amounts
of actual currency are accumulated In
the treasury at the very time When II
Is most needed in the business OF the
created the national banks and ex-
poets the country to employ them and
trust them. it does not trust them
itself. The government is the great
hoarder of money. AT a ume when
| there is a great and urgent demand
for currency everywhere. 1T becomes
| the instant duty of the secretary to
get into circulation just as much OF
| his superfuous hoard as ne Lawfully
and securely can. If Mr.. Cortelyou
with the best attainable advice. ex-
| ercised all the discretion that the stat
utes left to him-if even he strained
| the statutes, which is by no means
| established-he but showed his ca
! pacity to meet a great responsibility.-
| Philadelphia Ledger.
HUMANE SHIPMENT OF CATTLE
| The treatment of livestock by the
railroads has long been matter OF
| concern to the humane societies. These
creatures. destined for the slaughter
| houses, are on misera BILE journey al
| best but there is a large prudential
reason for delivering them at the
abattoir in as good condition as pos
| fare alone it has been found that ex-
| posture, fatigue and hunger causes the
] quality of the flesh to deteriorate.
| No doubt great difficulties beset the
railroads in an attempt to get theiI
stock trains through in accordance
with the regulations. They are for
| hidden to transport cattle more than
% hours at a stretch. and hve-houI
rests at the end of each period are
compulsory. This, of course. involves
labor and inconvenience. but these
| were bargained for when the shipment
| was undertaken. If a company pro-
poses to transport livestock 1t may also
agree to transport the creatures hui
| namely. A 28-hour trip means hun
ger. thirst. WEAKNESS and, in almost
all weather, exposure.-Boston Tran
script
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

1t seems to have arrived in the far Off
waters Of the Pacific in better condi-
ton. ship for ship, than it was when the
start was made and in the words of
Admiral Evans it is ready for target
practice or war. Happily it Is the for
mer that will be INDUCED in
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

1t is the opinion Of the state labor
commissioner that the law prohibiting
children under fourteen years of age
from being employed in factories
should be extended SO as to prohibit
the employment of children under
that age in all kinds of workshops
mercantile establishments and mes
aenger services. This suggestion OF
the labor commissioner should be well
taken. The employment of children
of immature years in any capacity
should be discouraged.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

DR.. Crumbine, secretary of the state
board OF health. examined 81 ginger
snap the other day. Among other
things in it he found nail, some
small particles of glass. some earth,
two or three small stones and bunch
of cat hair. No wonder he has issued
an edict that ginger snaps shall be
manufactured with care and shall be
free from deleterious things. The
adulteration such as he found is just
a little too much for anyone to stand.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

A e. Hepburn, a former comptrol-
Ter of the currency. declares that
England is our only friend and that
the other nations OF Europe regard US
as a bumptious people that ought to
be spanked into some sort of de-
corum. Perhaps this is so but none
of them seem unduly anxious to give
us the Spanking.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Cities in this country can get
valuable pointer for their automobile
regulations from Paris. The French
capital has a new one which requires
automobiles to stop after causing am
accident. and imposing both I'M
prfsonment and fine as the penalty of
an ATTEMPT to escape.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Everybody will join with Admiral
Dewey in his expression that the
battleship fleet under Bob Evans has
llonored the nation by its notable ex-
plot in cruising those thousands Of
miles without an untoward mishap.
AS he says 1t has demonstrated to the
world that we not only have weld
trained naval officers and seemen but
also a magnificent armada of battle
gtdpS
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Minority members Of the senate
committees have been rebuked by the
Democratic steering committee for
their inattention to business. The
Democratic senators can hardly be
blamed for not showing much interest
in the committee work because it is
so barren of results for them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Of the 1872 delegates so far selected
for the Republican national conven-
ton, 120 of them have been instructed
for Taft There are "a others in
structed for him but who are con-
tested. Mr. Fairbanks has % dele
gates instructed for him, and IL dele
gates are uninstructed. It's beginning
to look like a waIk-over for the secre-
farV of WAT.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Now that Bob Evans and his gallant
feet have arrived safe and sound at
Magdalena Bay it is the proper time for
nine out of every ten persons to remark
IT told you so' It will not be offensive
IN this instance for nine out of every
ten persons believed that the great fleet
mas capable TODD the task assigned to it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

The State Journal is a member OF the
Associated Press and receives the ftln DAY
teiegraph report of that great news or
Ranization for the exclusive afternoon
pubucation in Topeka.
THE news is received in The State Jour
nal building over wires for this sole pur-
nose.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

It is just a trife too bad that Ad-
fnirad Evans joints are. not in the
same excellent condition as those OF
his ships.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18

Congress can keep Just about as
busy doing nothing as the average
farm hand.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-03-18
French Affected Her Health.

The principal of girls school has
received from the mother of one pupil
a novel reason for wishing her daugh-
fer excused from French conversation
during meals. The excuse was accom-
panied by a doctors certificate to the
effect that the mental effort OF con-
centrating her thoughts on French
exercises while eating interfered with
tho nroper function of the young
iadv;s digestive organs. and If per-
sisted in was bound eventually to inn
nair her health. AS yet the other
pupils have not learned the cause or
their classmates exemption rom
French oh after at the table If they
do tini o>st it is feared that doctors
certificates will become epidemic.-
New York Press