The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-11-28

| outo.-PuCk.
was that you 1 kissed in tbe CON-
serVatory last mighty" ,"About who,
''ae was ltF'-Philadelphia Inquirer.
ohe-Yes, whenever l see q man IN q
oafk street I always run. HAAnd 40
you ever catch one Of them?-Harnor.s
| Weekly. aipef
| uiui see you in church yester.
uay No; Willie didn't shove, q
pain through the Sunday naners IN
time. Puck. -
.ony-How do you like nv bathing
SUIT! Dolly-It must have been ner.
lectiy sweet before you outgrew # :
Cleveland Leader.
naroer-Hair getting thin, sir. Ever
trled our hair preparation. sir? Chs.
tomer-No, 1 can't blame it on that
Boston Transcript.
He-Has your fortune ever been
TOLD! She-No; but / dare saw mana
VIII tell you If you really have serious
lntentions.-Sketch.
LOU seem to manage remarkably
wen on your housekeeping money"
Yes; the storekeepers haven't semi in
their bills yet" STRAY Stories.
Mr.. Phusser-Cynthia, 1 have Joined
Don't Worry Club. Mrs. Phusser-
l am sorry for the club. 1t will have
to change it's name.-Boston Traveller.
When they take woman away from
the co-educational college," said the
speaker, what will follOw?" 81 will"
cried voice from the audience.-Suc-
cess.
"Ah, see you are married." exclaim.
ed the merchant. mo, SIR" replied the
applicant for a position. II got this
scar in railroad accident The b.
hemian.
Louie-Uncle, what's chagrin? I'm
| cle-Well, it's what a stout man feels
when he runs and jumps on car that
doesn't start for half an Chicago
Daily News.
Tommy-POp, what is retribution?
Tommy's Pop-Retributiop, my son, is
something that we are sure will event
ually overtake other people.-Philadel-
phia Record.
"De real resourceful man." said I'm
Gle Eben, when some one hands him a
lemon is ready wild de sugar and other
fxin's to make it tol-lable pleasant to
take" Washington Star.
"Officer, appeal for protection. A
man is following me and attempting to
make love to me-" "Begorry, Owe been
lookin' for an escaped lunatic. Where
Is he?"-Kansas City Times.
Scott-What makes you think that
the trust originated in Rhode Island!
Mott-Dad used to speak OF the trust
in Providence as far back as when l
was a boy.-Boston Traveller.
Old Gent-Here, you boy, what are
Won doing out here, fishing? Don't you
know you ought to be at school? Small
Roy-rhere, now! I knew I'd forgot
something. Philadelphia Inquirer.
Spark+I wonder why it is woman
let's out everything you tell her! PARKS
My dear boy, woman has only TWO
views of a secret-either it is not worth
keening. or it is too good to keep
Stray Stories.
..You know Miss Strong, don't your
"Oh. yes; mannish sort OF girl. IL
che really?" "Yes; she used the tele-
nhone to-day for the first time In her
life. and she didn't giggle once phil
adelphia Press.
She-This dress doesn't become my
complexion. 1 must change II. ne
More expense? l can't stand 1t; you II
r,,n me She-You silly! don't mean
+ha dross-I mean the complexion
Chicago Journal.
.Here. Willie!" cried the boys IA
tber. "you mustn't behave that way
Everybody will be calling you HUE *,
olutton. Do you know what that Isl!
II suppose" replied Wlllie' It's d ois
elutton's little boy"
81 have written a book tnat every
hodv ought to read" said the autnor'
81 am afraid it won't do answered the
,,,h,isher. "What the public seems &c
wont now is a book that nobody ougnt
:, Washington Star.
blacksmith asked me to come 10 us
home This evening Says he's going 70
celebrate his golden wedding. Gladys
WIN he's been married only tnree
oars Jack-That's what l told niln'
nc sold it seemed like fifty.
Mrs. Henpeck Ito her husOano1.
what would you do If were to die'
uenneck-It would drive me crazy.
Mrs H-Would you marry again
uonneck-I don't think l wouio oe DIS
..our "a that.-Pioneer Press.
aHow often does the trolley run past
honscy, asked a tourist OF a
sor,ner "Waal, they run by SO ire
a 20. and SO often that | can't keep
~ track Of 'em, but I jedge the last
ono PASSED here two hours ago. -naf-
mrs Bazaar.