davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
FOOLS soFT.HEARTEo DEPUTY.
Prisoners Promise to Meet Him at
the Train Is Not Kept.

Duluth, Minn.-In search of a man
who was wanted on larceny charge
a deputy sheriff of St. Louis county
came to town and on a description
furnished to the police detectives
Schultz and Irvine picked up the fugi.
tive on the Bowery and brought him
to the central station.
When he was brought to the cell
door he threw himself on his knees
and pleaded pitifully, saying that he
would be disgraced forever II he was
put behind the bars; that he was in.
nocent, and II the officers would allow
him to go to hotel for the night he
would appear at the train the next
morning and accompany the sheriff.
The deputy was deeply touched by
the mans entreaties, but the detec.
tives said: ITS the old gag" The
deputy was sure his prisoner could
be allowed to go on his honor, and
as the local authorities could not be
held responsible for the prisoner he
was turned over to the deputy and the
two walked out of the station drying
their tears.
In the morning the soft.hearted dep.
uty was at the train, but he decided TO
prolong his visit in Duluth In an effort
to locate the man who had evidently
changed his mind about going back
with the sheriff. IF don't get that
fellow" said the deputy at the station,
its me for the farm"
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
SANDY ATE THE "PARRiTcH."
But He Had to Play Mean Trick on
Himself to Do II.

An old gentleman in a village not
far from Glasgow breakfasted every
morning on porridge. and, In order to
save fuel, cooked whole weeks sup
ply every Saturday. One Friday morn.
ing the stuff seemed very cold and
very salt, and he felt he must abandon
the struggle TO eat It. But his stub
born nature forbade any such thought.
So he fetched the whisky from the
cupboard, poured out glass and
placed 1t before him on the table.
Now, Sandy" said he, III we eat
that parritch ven hae that whisky, an
II We don't ye won't"
He stuck again at the last spoon,
full, but keeping his eye steadily on
the glass of whisky, he made bold
brave effort, and got It down. Then
be slowly and carefully poured back
the whisky into the bottle with q
groad grin, as he said to himself:
SANDY, my lad, did ye thot time, ye
ould fule!"
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Revenae,s Furious Appetite.

He who. from a natural sweetness
and facility of temper. should despise
injuries received, would doubtless do
a very great and a very laudable
thing; but he who, provoked and
nettled to the quick by an offense,
should fortify himself with the arms
of reason against the furious appetite
OF revenge, and, after a great conflict,
master his own passion, would doubt.
less do a great deal more.-Montaigne.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
He Wanted pie.

William j. Ryan, president Of the
supreme council Of public hackmen o:
New York, said the other day that the
winter panic had reduced the hack.
mems receipts considerably.
Wen have to come down to Eng.
i fish rates-12 cents mile instead OF
80 cents-if we have many more such
panics," Mr.. Ryan said. Everybody
felt the pinch. l overheard tramp
grumbling in public square.
The trade amt like 1t used to
be- he said. Here ten times running
to-day I've asked for bit of bread
and what do they give me? Why
,durn IL, Just bit o. bread"
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
HOUSE CALLED CRAZY QUILT.
Built of Odd Sizes Of Boards and Pee'
pie Are Kicking.

Chicopee, Mass.-The "crazy quilt"
house has caused numerous protests
that 1t is too unsightly to be regis
tered, but Mayor Beauchamp claims
he can do nothing to remedy the mat.
ter.
The building is on Perkins street
and has been built by Lawrence Ma.
jocka. AS Majocka owns the land
and has not evaded the building laws
the structure will be allowed to stand.
II is built Of odd sizes Of boards
and resembles a crazy quilt. Although
Majocka admits he is no carpenter,
yet he has done all the work himself.
He built the house to live in and
also with an eye to renting rooms,
but has not as yet completed the sec
ond story. There is a roof, but nc
window sashes or glass. In the base
ment he has built a pen for pigs, but
the board of health has called a halt
on the piggery.
In addition to the crazy quilt
house Majocka has built a one-story
brick structure in the back yard to
be used as a store. This Is OF brick
and Majocka laid them all himself
They are all sizes. colors and condi
tons, and there are great holes In
the walls where they fail to match.
The buildings are across the street
from the st. Joseph Temperance so
ciety's hall, and the members Of the
society are among those who have en-
tered protests.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
He Didn't Care.

T like simplicity" said Senator
Beveridge to Washington reporter.
simplicity saves us q lot Of trouble.
too. Two men met in front OF hotel
one day and fell into political argu.
ment. They were ordinary, everyday
sort OF men, but one OF them had an
extraordinary flow Of polysyllabic Ian.
guage. He talked half an hour, and
his companion listened in a doze.
IAN now, the speaker pompously
concluded, perhaps you will coincide
with me?'
The others face frightened up.
Why, yes, thanks, old man. he de.
clared heartily, moving toward the
barroom door, I don't care II I do +"
Home Magazine.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Paving the Way.

George" said the pretty girl. 81
know you're awful bashful."
This was portentous. with leap year
so new. He blushed assent.
And you'd have proposed to me ex
cept for that?"
This, too. he was bound to acknowl
edge.
well, would have accepted" she
went on, "and so that's settled"
Discussing the matter later she ex
pressed natural pride that she hat
not taken any advantage of the sea
son,
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Girl 10 Marvellous speIIer.

Waterloo, la.-Lucy Robinson, ten
years old, carried of championship
honors In the intercounty spelling con.
test at Manchester, Teams OF ten each
represented Black Hawk and Delaware
counties, Delaware winning both
team and individual honors. Lucy
Robinson is a three times champion,
having won her first medal when seven
years old
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

raise my hand above my head. The
doctor held out no hope Of my re-
covery, and I had given up, but at last
started using Doan's Kidney Pills and
made a rapid gain. After three months
use l was well and at work again"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Perseverance Essential.

There is certain point OF pro-
ficiency at which an acquisition begins
to be Of use. and unless We have the
time and resolution necessary to reach
that point, our labor is as completely
thrown away as that OF a mechanic
who began to make an engine but
never finished FTP. @. Hamerton.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
srArr or ONO, CRY OF TOLEDO, a.,

srArr OF ONE ONO; G cnr,T or TOLEDO IS.
FRANK j. CHENEY makes oath that he 10 senior
partner OF the nrm OF I. J. CHENEY q Co., doing
business in the City Of Toledo. County and State
aforesaid, and that said arm will pay the sam Of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every
case Of CATARsH that cannot DO cured BY the use Of
HALLS CATARRH CUM. : -
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn 10 before me and subscribed ia my presence,
49, A. W. GLEASON,
nALf NOTARY PUBLIC.
Hairs Catarrh Cure IL taken internally and acts
directly on tho blood and mucous surfaces OF the
system. Send for testimonials, free.
F. CHENEY CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by all Druggists, 15c.
Take Halls family Pills for constipation.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Use Where Needed,

Starboarder-Im going TO buy the
landlady bottle OF hair restorer.
Hallroom-Why she seems to have
a good head OF hair.
Starboarder-oh. hers Is all right
I'm going to get her TO use II on the
mattresses. -Philadelphia Record.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Insect Chemists.

Failing to bite sugar from several
Jumps, some marked bees under OBJ
servation of CASTOR BONNER. French
naturalist, flew away, returning in an
hour or two with other workers, after
first visiting a fountain. Settling on
,le sugar, they were seen to pump wa.
ter from their crops, when they sucked
Up the syrup so formed.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
LYDIA E. PINKHHM

Nature and woman's work CON-
bined have produced the grandest
remedy for woman's ills that the
world has ever known. .ta pa.
In the good old fashioned days Of
our grandmothers they relied upon
the roots and herbs of the field to
cure disease and mitigate suffering.
The Indians on our Western
Plains to-day can produce roots and
herbs for every ailment, and cure
diseases that battle the most skilled
physicians who have spent years in
the study of drugs.
From the roots and herbs of the
field Lydia K. Pinkham more than
thirty years ago gave to the women
of the world a remedy for their Pc
culiar ills, more potent and effica-
cious thana any combination of drugs.
Lydia +. Pinlxham's Vegetable
Compound is now recognized as the
standard remedy for woman's ills.
Mrs. Bertha Muff, of 515 NC. st.,
Louisiana, Mo-, writes:
complete restoration to health
| means so much to me that for the sake
of other suffering women l am willing
to make my troubles public.
"For twelve years 1 had been suffer-
ing with the worst forms Of female ills.
During that time had eleven different
physicians without help. No tongue
/ can tell what suffered, and at times !
could hardly walk. About two years
ago wrote Mrs. Pinkham for advice.
l followed IL, and can truly say that
Lydia L. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound and Mrs. Pinkham's advice re-
stored health and strength. It is
worth mountains Of gold to suffering
women"
What Lydia L. Pinkham's Vege-
table Compound did for Mrs. Muff,
it will do for other suffering women.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
ExTREEi ExTREEi

si-Pop. the old red caow hez
kicked the bucketi
Hi-Je-rushlem, wouldn't TUX $40
fer tibet caow! Did she pass away In
peace?
Si-She passed away in pieces, yep!
The old fule kicked tibet bucket O. stun
yeou go tew blow up stumps with!
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

invalid with kidney
troubles, and often
wished death might
end my awful suffer
ings. The secretions
were thick with sedi-
ment, my lin b s
swollen and my right
side so nearly par
alyzed I could not
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
WHY, OF COURSE.

Weary Waggs-Say, lady, would yez
mind lendin' me dime fer car fare?
I'm de Due de Chilblaines in disguise,
an I'm on me way to keep an appoint
ment with a heiress.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

Louisiana he's a steel sawmill with
a capacity of 100000 feet a day. which
is said to be the largest in this
country.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Through Struggle to Repose.

Struggle and anguish have their
place in every genuine life, but they
are the stages through which It ad'
yances to strength which is full OF
repose.-Mabie.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Il Cures While You Walk.

Aliens Foot-Ease is certain cure for
hot, sweating, callous, and swollen, aching
feet. Sold by all Druggists. Price 25c. Don't
accept any substitute. Trial package FREE.
Address Allen S. Olmsted, lie Roy, N. Y.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
ALMOST A MIRACLE.
Raised Up When Science Said There
Was No Hope.

q. w. L. Nesbitt, Depot Street,
Marion, KY, writes 81 was chronic
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

Mrs. WInslow's Soothing Syrup.
For children teethlng, sofens the gums, reduces In
Examination, Alays pain, cures wind collie Csc bottle
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

When jealousy gets busy love takes
vacation.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
GARFIELD
Digestive Tablets,

From your druggist, or the Garfield
Tea Co.. Brooklyn, N Y. 25c per bottle.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
important to Mothara.

CASTORIA a safe and sure remedy for
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
COFFEE
Your grocer must sell
poor coffee; we can't all
be comfortable; but he
needn't sell it to you.
edn't sell it to you

Your grocer returns your money II you don't
like Schillipg's Best we pay him.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09
Necessities.

Knicker-Do you favor school of
Journalism in the universitiesf
Bocker-There should be three: ono
on how to run papers, one on how to
keep out of them and one on how to
get into them.
The Garland globe. [volume] (Garland, Utah) 1906-191?, 1908-05-09

u man has enough push he'll man.
age to pull through.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
Ermine on Morosini Naus.

Not satisfied with having clad her
favorite horses in royal leopard skins,
Miss Giulia Morosini, always on the
lookout for new excuse for extrava-
gance, this winter will dazzle the fash
ionable world by blanketing her thor
oughbreds in ermine, says the New
York Press. How pretty penny that
fad will cost may be calculated from
the fact that single ermine lining
for a coat Of any length is worth ST.
O0O A horse of course Will require
more of the fur than woman, and,
besides, there are at least half doz-
en- high priced nags that share first
place in Miss Morosini's affections.
This picturesque young woman doubt
less will go step beyond even this
newest within, and when the first thrill
of the ermine blanket has. passed she
may be expected to deck her high step
pers with golden surcingles studded
with diamonds.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Socrates had his joke. 1t was his
custom to foregather now and then
with conviviai circle of philosophers,
geometers and others. On such occa-
sions at the stroke of a. N. he would
rise Qt is reported of him that he al
ways could risel and address the chair.
MIR. President" he would say, II
move you that this circle now go home
and square itself"
And his credit was such and people
We're SO used to taking him seriously
that it came to be believed that the
squaring of the circle was an impos-
sible thing. Puck
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

When the stomach. heart or kid
ney nerves get weak, then these or
gans always fail. Don't drug the stom-
ach, nor stimulate the heart or kid
neys That is simply makeshifr
Get prescription known to druggists
everywhere as DR.. Shops Restora
tive. The Restorative is prepared ex,
pressly for those weak inside nerves.
Strengthen these nerves, build them
up with Dr. Shops Extraordinarily
let's or liquid-and see how quickly
help will come. Free sample test
sent on request BY DR.. Shoop, Racine,
Wis. Your health is surely worth this
simple test. Sold by all dealers.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
A Tokyo Discovery.

The Agricultural college, Tokyo, re-
Gently announced that it had discov-
.ered method of making pulp from
bamboo grass-sa sa-for which the
highest results are claimed, says the
Engineer. The bamboo grass Is very
common in Japan and has been put to
little use. 1t is proposed to teach the
method to the Japanese farmers, and
as it is hoped that pulp will be pro-
duced cheaply by it both the farmer
and the consumer should benefit. The
matter is still under investigation, and
no details are Obtainable.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
HIDDEN DANGERS.
Nature Gives Timely Warnings that
No Elk Point Citizen Can Afford to

Nature Gives Timely Warnings that
No Elk Point Citizen Can Afford to
Ignore.
DANGER SIGNAL NO / comes
from the kidney secretions, They will
warn you when The kidneys are sick.
Well kidneys excrete a clear, amber
fluid Sick kidneys send out thin,
hale and foamy, or 4 thick, red. i'll
smelling urine, full of sediment and ir-
regular of passage.
DANGER SIGNAL NO, 2 comes
from the back Back pains dull and
heavy or sharp and acute. tell you of
sick kidneys and warn you of the APP
proach of dropsy, diabetes and Bright's
disease. Doan's Kidney Pills cure sick
kidneys and cure them permanently
Here's Elk Point proof
Clement Guillaume, retired farmer,
Washington ST., Elk Point, S. D., says:
Kidney Pills are an efficient and posi-
tive cure for bladder disease or kid
ney disorders. For four or five years
my urine was altogether too frequent
and it often interfered with my rest at
night. There was also a scalding sen
sation in passing that gave me intense
pain. | knew that my bladder and
kidneys We're seriously disarranged.
and having read about Doan's Kidney
Pills decided to get box at the Pho
neer Drug Store. Thanks to your
medicine, / am now all right, and the
cure has been permanent. Doan's
Kidney Pills have my hearty support,
For sale by all dealers. Price SO
cents. Foster-Milburn Co, Buffalo
New York, sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name-Doan sand
take no other.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Farmer Carries Produce Fifty Miles
and Saves Ten Days Year.

Farmer Carries Produce Fifty Miles
and Saves Ten Days a Year.
Charles Blake, who has big prod
uce farm at Blake's hill, near East
Cornwall Conn, used to reckon on
two days for the long trip from his
farm to Waterbury. Conn, and back,
at best hard trip on the horses, says
a Waterbury special to the New York
World.
But now Blake has a big touring
car. He loads up the tonneau with
butter and eggs and vegetables, be
seats himself on fine cushion Instead
of ON hard board, adjusts his Cog
giles, seizes the steering wheel. and
away he goes, speeding without jolt
hard enough to crack one of the eggs.
If he wanted. Blake could run rings
around the farmers wagons he passed.
The other farmers curse him fervently,
Mr.. Blake calculates that he saves
ten days year with his auto.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

This is to certify that all druggists
are authorized to refund your money If
Foley's Honey and Tar fails to cure
your cough or cold. II stops the cough
heels the lungs and peryenis serioD'
results from cold Cures "a grippe
coughs and prevents pneumonia and
consumption. Contains no opiates.
The genuine is in yellow package.
Refuse substitutes. Pioneer Drug Co.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
Cyclists, Liuhts.

An agitation is on foot to compel
bicyclists to carry lamps showing a
red light at the rear, says the Motor
Cycle Nothing difficult In this and ex-
cellent for the lamp makers. But why
not first of all compel bicyclists to
carry lamp showing a light at the
frontY
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

One Of the worst features of kidney
trouble is that it is an insidious disease
and before the victim realizes his dan
ger he may have a fatal malady. Take
Foley's Kidney Cure at the first sign OF
trouble,as 1t corrects irreP ularities and
prevents Bright's disease and diabetes
Phone en- Drug Co
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

The finest coffee substitute ever
made, has recently been produced by
Dr. Shoop. of Racine, Wis. You don
have to boil it twenty or thirty min
utes. Made in minute" says the
doctor Health Coffee" Is really the
closest coffee imitation ever yet pro
duced. Not a grain of real coffee in
it either. Health Coffee imitation Is
made from pure toasted cereals or
grains, with malt, nuts, etc. Really II
would fool an expert-were he to un-
knowingly drink it' for coffee. Rln8s-
rud Mercantile Co.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

A tickling cough, from any cause,
is quickly stopped by DIR. Shops
Cough Cure And it is SO thoroughly
harmless and safe that DIR. Shoop tells
mothers everywhere to give it without
hesitation, even to very young babes.
The wholesome green leaves and ten
der stems of hung healing mountain
Gus shrub, furnish the curative prop
critics to DR.. Shops Cough Cure. 1t
Gains the cough, and heals the sore
and sensitive bronchial membranes.
No opium, no chloroform, nothing
harsh used to injure or suppress. sim
ply a resinous plant extract. that helps
to heal aching lungs. The Spaniar1s
call this shrub which the doctor uses,
THE Sacred Herb" Away demand
Or. Shops Cough Cure. Sold by all
dealers.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Gentleman or lady to travel for Mer-
camille House of large capital Terri
tory at home or abroad To suit. If de
sirable the home may;be used as head
quarters. Weekly salary Of Sl,000per
year and EXPENSES. Address joseph A
Alexander, Elk Point, s OAK
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Bee i Laxative Cough Syrup for
coughs, colds, Group and whooping
cough grows in favor daily. Mother
should keep 1t on hand for children.
l. u prompt relief to Group. 1t is
gently LAXATIVE, driving The poison ana
DhleRm from the system. II gives
immediate relief. Gaaranteed. Sold
BY Pioneer Drug Co.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
Snadinn Hard Ground.

The first point In rapid, easy digging
b to keep one side edge of the spade
always out of the earth, in sight. In
other words, let the cuts be alternately
somewhat diagonal instead Of straight
across, which would form, If the lines
were marked, kind Of crisscross
Thus held the spade sinks more read
lily and the one edge breaks off true
and easily.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Trial catarrh treatments are being
mailed out free, on request, by DR..
Shoop, Racine. Wis. These tests are
proving to the people-without a pen
nys cost-the great value of this sci
entific prescription known to druggists
everywhere as DR.. Shops Catarrh
Remedy. Sold by all dealers.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

An American tourist on the summit
of Vesuvius was appalled, at the gran
deur of the sight
Great snakes.'' he exclaimed. 1T
reminds me of hades."
Cad, how you Americans do trav-
el?' replied his English friend, who
stood near by Ladies' Home Journal
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
Simple Remedy For La Grippe

La grippe coughs are dangerous, as
they frequently deyelopinto pneumonia.
Foley's Honey and Tar not only stops
the cough but heals and streng heas
the lunes SO that no serious resalls
neea be feared. The genuine f leyA
Honey and Tar contains no harmful
drugs and is in a yellow pack age.
Refuse substitutes. Pioneer Drug Co.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23

Rings Little Liver Pills wake up
lazy livers, clean the system and
clear the skin. Toy them for
biiousness and sick headache, Price.
% cents Sold by Pioneer Drug Go.
Union County courier. [volume] (Elk Point, Union County, D.T. [S.D.]) 187?-1913, 1908-01-23
How to Avoid Appe ndicitis

Most victims of appendicitis are those
who are haD;tually constipated. Orino
Laxative Fruit Syrup cures chronic
constipation by stimulating the liver
and bowels and restores the natural
action OF the bowels. Orino Laxative
Fruit Syrup does not nauseate or grippe
and IL mild and pleasant to take. Refuse
substitutes. Pioneer Drug Co.