The Rich Hill tribune. (Rich Hill, Mo.) 1903-1911, 1908-04-30

orator Is lot down from his pinnacle
and expends his energy IN loud talk Ia
his Immediate vicinity, until some
O whrowed gentleman advises him to
Cut Il out. at the same time casting
a perfectly annIhliatng look In bis
direction.
The old stagers always enjoy these
interludes. They smile grimly, get a
fresh grip on their cigars and elevate
the weeds rem%iniscently In a skyward
angle. They keep watchful cognizanca
when their wards are about TO be
reached and. II chairmen, rise IN.
stantly at the word. shout clearly the
vote aud. whether It be recorded
right or wrong. they settle Gown
s~toloally into the attitude OF mere
spectators. Far be Il from them TO
"holler" II the cards are stacked
against them. They would do the
same II they had the power. The
other fellows have the whip-hand to.
day when It shifts. they will give
their opponents the same dose But
10 cavort arornd on the floor waiIing
out "Meestair Chairmannn. not for
thom They are too wise to resort 20
such paerile foolishness.
Nothing al exceed the perfect re-
pose which marks the proceedings AZ
relates TO the officers and head men
who have It IN charge. There Is not
a shadow Of a smile on the counte
nances OF the chairman and his assist
ants and the bosses move around
on the floor Of the convention or as
cend to the platform with an entirely
serious and ~virtuous air which would
indicate extreme self-sacrihce and the
o absolute fairness TO their Cd
ponents.
But once the business Is concluded.
over the cigars and cocktails these
genial gentlemen viii unbend and re.
late delightedly and with rare humor
the amusing comedies played on the
convention floor. They have remem
bered the very voices and gestures OF
the refOrmers and patriots, they can
initiate. and perfectly, the surprised
scream OF the piundered delegation. or
the stentorian yswp Of the h~ard-bofled
orator. They enjoy these things with
the gustO OF the connoisseur. the 20
utical bon vivant. But at the hall. and
In the midst Of the carnAge. they are
as as panthers and as remorse
less as cannibals Everything goes
In politics.. Is theH motto. that is.
everything but honesty.
Coming back from my last political
convention J met Jack Derby In the
smoker Jack was from the ward
next to mine, and / had missed him
just before the voting began / had
noticed a stranger tn hts seat when /
came In rather late, but stfI In time
to vote. Jack vas moody and his head
was done Up in a gaudy handkerchief
What's upf ! said 20 him. 4 didn't
see you when the votes we're being
cast.
They thrun me out was his 70
ply. 4 went over TO see a friend o
mine In the fourteenth aud when / got
back 70 me seal they was a guy there
ia H. ] grabbed him and he caught
hold OF me arms The sarge" ser
geant-atarmsl came rumuin' up an
this gus gives him the wink an says
this fellers a pick-pocket Before
could hand him n the sarge" grabs
inches seven feet long and four feet
through-and he wings me to the door
in four jumps and fires me by the neck
and pants. Seer An I lose me vote
an don't get In the han again"
That's tough. Jack, was my con.
solatory reply.
Tough said Mr. Derby. with an
injured air. AN ! wa goln 10 vote
right ell the time. / think that ser.
geant must be bugs"
ERNEST MGAFFEV