davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Farming on the Yukon.

W. M. Swinehart has compiled for
publication the results Of his expert
ence in farming at Fort Selkirk, and
these show that, taking one season
with another, the crops raised and the
prices received for the product are
sufficient to cause the average farmer
In the States to look to the North
with envy. oat hay. the chief crop
produced. yields about three tons to
the acre, and sells readily in the
spring at from 800 to $125 per ton.
Demand has never been lacking for
all the hay the farm produces, since
the Dawson-White Horse stage line,
on which from $50 to 400 horses are
used every winter for several months,
passes within a few miles OF the
farm. Potatoes yield from three to
fiye tons to the acre and bring as
much as twenty-five cents a pound.
The average price for a series Of
years has been fraction over twenty
cents pound. Rutabagas yield six
tons to the acre. and sell for six cents
a pound, or $500 an acre. Carrots
yield three tons to the acre and sell
for fifteen cents pound, a return Of
$500 per acre. Cabbages vary in pro-
duction according to season. ranging
from three to eight tons to the acre
and the price ranges from fifteen to
twenty cents per pound. 1t is an
exceptional season when the SWINE
hart farm does not net its owners an
income of s10,0OO.-Seattle Post In
telligencer.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Railway Acquaintance in AmerIcn.

You may travel 1000 miles on O
railway in Europe and never a man,
whether English, FFench. German or
what not, will open his mouth to
speak to you il you are stranger, .
sad J. ~. Pike, OF Philadelphia.
For total freezeout accord the
palm to the English. Your true
Briton regards any man who has
nerve to speak to him without ever
having been formally introduced as
reeking with effrontery. and, there
fore, to be disdained and snubbed.
| want to except from these a class
Of Englishmen who have been about
the world good bit. I've met few
of this sort who had knocked about
the world and who were not sus-
picious of a stranger who addressed
them that he had designs on their
poeketbook.
Maybe in the course OF time and
the process Of evolution we, may get
the same elamlike reserve over here
in America, but don't expect to see
It in my lifetime, and l am glad tc
think whenever | enter parlor car
for ride to San Francisco or Seattle
that though may not know a blessed
man on that train when enter, ere
100 miles have been trayersed l shall
be talking with some good American
whom l never saw before as though
we had been friends and comrades
from our earliest youth r-Nashfnfs
ton Herald.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
BERNARD SHAW ON
MANS COWARDICE.
Characteristic FotIng Up Of Eng.
ush Mlddle-class Clerks BY TIE
samous Irish Author.

"0f all the qualities Of man find
nothing so astonishing as his Sheep
ishness, docllity and cowardice.
When thess qualities are developed
to their outmost by civilization and
poverty in the middle class you get
the clerk. I have been a clerk on
q stool in a very genteel office my.
self. and probably would have been
there yet II l had not broken loose
in defiance of all prudence and be-
come professional man"
That is part Of an interesting
article by George Bernard Shaw,
based on a chapter in his life and
apparently intended to call attention
to his greatness. But, on closer scru-
tiny, all of this is seen to be one OF
Mr.. Shaw's characteristic showman's
tricks for arousing his readers In
terest before preaching a serious
doctrine.
So, after leading up to hard rap
at the poor middle class parents who
overestimate the dignity Of clerk
ships and underestimate the dignity
You cannot make an Arab
clerk; you cannot make a North
American a clerk, but you can make
an imperial Englishman a clerk
quite easily. All you have to is to
drop him into a poor middle class
family with father who cannot af-
ford to keep him, give him capital
to start life with or carry his educa-
tion beyond the elementary stage. but
who would yet be disgraced II the
son became a workingman. Given
these circumstances. what can the
| poor wretch do but become a cierk2
In genteel modification of this
course l became a clerk myself. Ny
father was a corn merchant and mill
owner, and. like ninety-nine men out
OF hundred. pursued a routine he
didn't know anything about and at
tributed his difficulties vaguely to
want Of capital. He landed in the
Bankruptcy Court, and as a result
! spent four and a half years in an
office before was twenty years old.
Il may have had a comparatively
easy time, but l didn't get much
pay-as a clerk, of course. was
always learning though I
reached position of responsibility.
One of the worst things about being
clerk, / found, was that l always
dreamed myself back In the Office
during sleeping hours. my employer
thus swindling me by annexing a por-
ton of my out-of-oniee time.
"One of my clerkly acquaintances
was an. ancient bookkeeper-long
since dead-whom l asked one day II
he intended to make a bookkeeper of
I his son. He was usually mild-man-
nered but suddenly he became yehe-
ment to the verge of fury and de-
clared that rather than see his son
a clerk he would have let him die in
the cradle. wondered whether there
was any clerk alive who really liket
being a clerk and who would choos
that occupation for his son.
When the bookkeeper died m
employer offered me his Job, but
refused. He wanted my place for
relative. London Correspondence,
of the New York Times.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

A gentleman owning a sugar estate
In Demerara went out to visit it for
the first time. The day after his ar
rival he stood watching the punts
bringing the cane home. A young
negro boy who was driving the mules,
wishing to increase the speed-of these,
struck one of them with his whip.
The mule promptly responded BY
launching out with his heels and dealt
the boy a kick on the head which
stretched him out on the ground.
where he lay rubbing his woolly pate
on the spot where the kick had been
received.
Is he hurt? Is he hurt?- cried
the planter in alarm. A full grown
negro hearing the expressions of con-
Germ sprang forward hastily, and.
raising the mules heels, shouted out:
NO, boss! That mule him walk
tendeh 70 a day or two, but him no
hurt. ."-Chambers' Journal.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
LA PLATA. MARYLAND. FRIDAY MARCH 20. 1908

found and in part revealed the won
der of our creation.
stepping from the platform with
scelpel in hand. he then advanced to
the table, removed the shee. from
the corpse. and while gazing on the
face of the dead woman, the color
left his cheeks. the scalpel shook in
his hand. he gasped for breath, and
said:
Janet Jane. Great Heaven, It is
Janet and fell in my arms.
"Restoratives were applied to his
bloodless lips. and when he had re-
covered sufficiently to speak, he said:
Gentlemen. am III. There will
be no dissection this afternoon. Leave
the ROOM Tomorrow meet me at
the usual hour
what became of the dead body we
never learned. It was removed that
nightly whom and where to was
never known by US. The surgeon also
disappeared that night, and never en-
tered the college again. What be-
came of him always remained a mys-
terry. He may have departed for
Europe in the morning upon some
vessel leaving port. or he may have
comitted suicide. A body resembling
the doctor was found floating in the
East River some weeks after, but It
was too much decomposed for identi-
flcation.
~The mystery connected with the
dead-room never was fully explained.
Rumor had It, but It was never fully
confirmed, that the Doctors wife had
deserted him in England many years
previous to this event, and ran away
with a British sea captain, and that
the doctor came to America under an
assumed name. Being a skillful sur
geon, he readily attained the honored
rank he held.
"How the woman met her untimely
death no one ever knew. Her para
mour may have grown tired of her,
as is the general result, and she may
have welcomed death in a watery
grave, or she may have accidentally
fallen from the ships deck. That
she was the doctors wife there can be
no doubt
~Now captain" continued the doc
tor. Il have told you the story Of the
dead-room. The mystery connected
with the affair can only be left to
conjecture New York Weekly.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
A Profitable Crop
in the Northwest

The second factor making for the
new prosperity may be termed the
discovery of fax" For years there
had been a few scattered fax fields.
but it was only in the middle nine
ties that the Northwestern pioneer
awoke to the discovery that linseed
oil was OF a more truly golden hue,
not only than the wheat field, but
than any goid-bearing quartz Cali
fornia ever saw. And so the endless
golden yellow OF the fields Of wheat
gave place to the blue flowers in
August and the tinkling bells in Sep
tember OF the fax field.
Those who have never heard the
ringing of the fax bells have missed
a truly wonderful sensation. The
round seed pods, smaller than peas,
which contain the seed, give a faint
metallic sound which as one drives
or walks through a field, setting
thousands in motion. seems like my
riads of infinitesimal bells tinkling SO
family as TO be all but inaudible. Nor
is the mere sight of fax field in the
mellow August soon to be forgotten.
Imagine a hundred-acre field, filled
with flowers of blue more delicate
than violets. And of its profitable
character one illustration will suf-
fee. In June. 1900, Ole Jansen
bought hundred and sixty acres in
the heart Of the great fax belt for
$40 an acre on the crop payment
plan. Ole broke up that fall and
the next spring hundred and thirty
FIVE acres and planted 1t in fax. In
round numbers, he threshed in the
fall eighteen and one-half bushels
to the acre; sold It for s1.3s1k
buishel; total. $500; a little more
than twice enough to pay for his
land out of his first crop. Not only
was the fax immensely profitable IT.
self but it removed from the eoun-
try the stigma. ''one crop country"
From The World To-Day.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20


DR.. cabanes writes that Napoleon's
father was topper. a man utterly
lacking in moral sensibility, and that
his sisters were immodest and hyster.
ical. Pauline was particularly SO,
Napoleon himself was exceedingly
sensitive to atmospheric changes. was
headachey and had auditory Illusions.
He had twitchings of the arms, the
shoulders and the lips. He was at
times the most irritable of men. often
being unapproachabIe. His mania for
destruction was such that he whitfield
pieces of furniture. broke articles pre-
sented to him, pinched babies while
pretending to caress them and took
keen delight in shooting Josephine's
rarest birds. The slightest opposl-
sition threw him into a paroxysm of
rage. But in a campaign all weak.
nesses vanished. His pulse ranged
ordinarily between thirty and thirty.
five beats a minute. and never went
above ifty-five. The usual pulse rate
Is about seyenty-two a minute.-New
York Press.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
A LITTLE FELnow's TIME.

When you were little did you have
A little fellows time.
That isl mean-a grapevine swing
And guariy trees 10 climb.
And awkward legged calves to chase,
And yellow chicks to hold.
And an old kissing gander, too,
To scare you stiff and coldg
Say, did you have little lamb,
And colt. all for your own,
And an old cows sleek sides to stroke,
And an old bowlder-stone
Beside the kitchen door whereon
You, wee yellow-head
Were wont to sit and swing your heels
And eat your lasses bread?
And was there, too, an old gray mare,
A ~Dobhin7 or a Kit.
On whose broad hack, with daddy's help
YJu used sometimes to sit
And ride away down TO the creek
In which she used to wade
And thrust her nose until you screamed,
1t made you so sfraids
A mother and grandmother, too?
A grandpop and a dad
To take you with them to the fields
And woods and make you glad
With goblin stories. told so deep.
You didn't care to cheep.
And nights did they just fairly fuss
To smuggle you 10 sleep,
o, meadows. fields and wooded ways,
And creeks Of long agol
o. awkward calves, and kissing geese,
And cows that used to low!
What pleasant memories We make
When age bows down the head
OF him who, just a killed babe,
There ate his 'lasses breadi
j. NJ. Lewis, in Houston Post.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
piled .iss:.. e. :s..sss.1 s&1 s.'ySa''. re

piled the surgeonA - ?
Have fresh 1octor. Found
it floating in the h-rbor at daylight
this morning. Femlle. about fifty,
and good form. From an English
vessel, no doubt.
What is the prIce?' asked the
surgeon.
Cannot deliver it at the college
for less than hundred, was the re-
ply.
Too much, answered the sur
geon. You are above the market
Sorry we cannot agree said the
man, with scowl; but the fact is.
doctor, no class of individuals takes
such risks and work as hard for our
money as us fellers, and mostly for
the benefit OF science.
He was about to depart when the
surgeon called him back.
Make it seventy-five and you can
bring the subject
Sorry, doctor, but l can't. You
see, Jim and l is in partnership in
this stiff, as he happened in the boat
with me, and when we come to divide
the matter it will be only fifty each.
We honestly earned every cent we
ask
Well, replied the surgeon, bring
the subject to the dead-room tonight.
and your price shall be paid.
-she following Cay the professor
announced in his morning lecture
that fine female subject had been
obtained, and that in the afternoon
he should disseet it in their presence
and for their benefit in the science of
obstetrics. A full class and a careful
hearing were demanded.
-The subject hal been placed on
the disseeting table in the dead-room.
and a white sheet carefully secured
1t from view. A full class was in
attendance at the afternoon exer-
cises.
The professor dwelt with warmth
upon this delicate branch OF medical
science, and said the theme was pro-
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Horse Must Not Shy at Motor

Horses have no business to be fright.
ened at motor cars. Such is the lat.
est decision of NJ. Sere de Riyieres,
the Good Judge" of Paris. A case
was brought before him by the own.
er of two horses which had been
frightened by the passing of two mo.
tor cycles on one OF the public high.
ways in the Department of the Som.
me. The driver. in trying to master
the horses, was run over by the cart.
The owner sued for damages. The
Judge decided they were not due, as
horses ought to be trained so as not
to shy at the noises OF motor vehi-
eles. II peasants had no motor cars
to supply the object lesson, so much
the worse for the peasants.-Paris
Correspondent London Telegraph.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
3333333333333
A STORY OF The DEAD-ROOM.
By CAPTAIN BARCLAY.
3333333333333I

Il presume. doctor, there are many
sorrowful scenes which present them
selves in your profession. remarked
to the surgeon of our regiment, as |
spent an evening in his tent. while
we were in camp.
Eyes, indeed" he replied, with an
air of nonehalance "But, then, cap
tain. you are a soldier. and you know
how fellow will get used to most
anything. You do not shudder now
at seeing dead men lying around loose
as you used to do. do your
well. no." l replied. "that is too
true"
az remember one incident in my
life. when a student Of medicine in
a New York college" continued the
doctor, "that has never been erased
from my memory. 1t is full a quar-
ter Of a century since 1t occurred, aud
yet remember it well. I would to
Heaven it could pass from my mind.
War is full of horrors" continued
the doctor. "and have been in hos
pitfalls where the shrieks Of the
wounded and the grdans OF the dyius
mingled, and went about my 1usi
ness almost as the weaver listens t
the sound of his looms. But this !
a story of the dead-room, where n
sound is heard but the sharpening o
the scalpel and the almost noiseles
tread of the surg con.
Among the professors H. the med
ical college at that time was DR.. F.
an English surgeon. He was a mar
OF brilliant attainments, both as a
scholar and as surgeon.
He was probably sixty years of
age. and had no family, al least he
never spoke of one. Why he left his
native land, and why he hardly ever
smiled. no one seemed to know, and
probably no one cared to ask. We,
as students, paid our money for a
knowledge Of medicine and surgery.
and did not trouble ourselves about
the history of those who taught us.
THE winter season of lectures had
commenced, and students from nearly
every section Of the United States
"Ne~ - SAI SAN- " tAAANnu IL. ouD-
iects for dissection were required.
and sometimes, like other articles in
the market, the supply exceeded the
demand, and at other times the dead
room was short. Body-snatchers
were employed at the current rates,
and were paid for the bodies fur
nished by the law of supply and de-
mand. Subjects were scarce and IN
demand the winter have named, and
prices rose accordingly.
1 happened in the English profess
sor's room one morning to examine a
medical work that required my at
tention. A gentle rap came on the
door, and the doctor said. Walk in
c.Ifsnew the visitor and his calling
at aiN fance. His soulless eyes glanced
ca xsly around the room, and then
| ba1 Nj .f~as4a-atfsars4sn-
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Dick-'How is your woman's club
getting on these days?"
Eva-"Fine. | am on the hang
ing committee now"
Hanging committee? Do
you hang pictures2"
Eva-"Oh, no. The hanging com
mittee' sits at the club windows on
rainy days and criticises the hang Of
of their sisters skirts as the latter
pass outside. Chicago News.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Olive-"What an improvement Il
will be II the time ever comes when
everybody can get seat in the street
cars.
Violet-"Ob. don't know. A girl
would never be sure then that she
was pretty. Puck.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Not AIutilated.

Bacon" Going to keep a diary
next year,
Egbert-"Sure thing
Bacon-"B Bought the diary yeti"
Egbert-~D Don't have to- I've got
the one bought last year. "-Yonkers
Statesman.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

do you believe in special provi-
denees?"
Sure. When l was a boy the
school / attended was struck by light
ming one night and burned"
Nothing special about that
@oh, but It was Just the night be-
fore the circus came to town. Phil
adelphia Ledger.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

This weeks journalistic slips are
funny. seventy rer cent. OF the Hun
earian population are forced to live
IN one room, according to the Mail.
a roomy room. In its obituary of
Lord Drampton the Lincolnshire
Echo says there is hardly a race
horse in the kingdom on which his
well-known figure has not been seeni
From London Opinion.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Usually.

business Man (busy with CORE.
spondence)-@In that telegram OF
Beattie's. yesterday. he said. letter
following. l don't see the letter
here.
Stenographer-@W Why. don't you re.
member?-we received It the day be-
fore we got the telegram. Puck.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

You are a wonderful master Of
the piano. hear.
Il blay aggompaniments zome-
times
Accompaniment to singing?"
Aggompaniments to gonversa-
tions. Home Magazine.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

"At last" he sighed. we're alone.
I've been hoping for this chance"
so have l. said she very frankly.
"Ahl you have guessed, then. that
l wanted to tell you that love you.
Yes, and l want to say No and
get It over with catholic Stand.
ard,
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

81 tell you she's down and out. She
took the count.
What OF it?"
Before the panic she wouldn't
look at anything less than duke. -
Courier Journal.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Are you sure this horse will not
run away7" asked the man who was
getting into the buggy.
Yep" replied the livery stable
keeper; there amt the least danger
that he'll run away, but he may trot
some comm back. Chicago Rec.
ord-Herald.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

am afraid you don't appreciate
that composition. remarked the mu-
siclan.
No." answered Mr.. Cumrox; sin
all frankness. must say l don't. II
keeps me guessing
Yes. / always have three guesses
why anybody wrote it in the first
place. why anybody plays it in the
second, and why anybody listens 10 It
In the third. Washington Star.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

II thought you swore of drinking
on the first of the year.
$50 did; always do. So
But you're drinking now.
"Of course; II / hadn't sworn on
again. how could l swear of noxt
year," - Catholic Standard and
Times.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Recent Explorers insist that there
are three natural bridges in SOUTH
eastern Utah as much larger than the
Natural Bridge in Virginia as Pixies
Peak is higher than Mount Washing
ton,
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Hortense Highschool - Doesn't
Freddie Frat wear the most striking
clothes?n
James Geometry-"Sure! Those
buttons he's got on that suit make
him look like an animated cash reg
lister. Chicago News.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

The smoke from the bowl of ones
Pine is blue because. coming from the
red-hot tobacco, it is very highly oxi-
died. but the smoke from ones lips
is gray because it is highly watered
and ydrtcarbonIzed.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
Jumping.

She-"Thls paper says that Miss
Abbie Lathrop, Of CRANKY, Mass, runs
a mouse farm. What do you think OF
that?7
He-~I think it must keep her on
the jump
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20
VIII fbe Funny
How to Criticise.

II you would be a music sharp,
Then do as / advise.
List to the eddie or the harp
And look exceeding wise
Then shake your head and murmur;
@Huml
think he blurred the tempo some
When the pianist bangs the keys,
Assume a knowing pose.
Twiddle your fingers, cross your knees,
And elevate your nose.
And when he's done remark. Il think
His executiou's on the blink"
-Washinston Herald.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Il don't know who that woman is,
but they tell me she is Mrs Some
body. She certainly is an awful flirt;
l wonder her husband doesn't keep
her in better order. Doesn't he try
tor
mo. n
why doesn't he?"
Because. you see. his wife is a
widow. Baltimore American.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

A half century ago DR.. Gannett
made upon the writer an impression
never to be forgotten when he said.
Hope takes on half the burden; de-
spair doubles it Christian Regis.
ter.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Those who have the heart to do
good never need complain for lack of
opportunity.-Scottish Reformer.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

Whether education Shall increase
virtue or not depends uAan the kind
OF educationtthat one receives.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

A rational prejudice is a labor saw.
ing device. Most of the training in
the home, the church, and the school
is intended to implant wholesome and
protective prejudices in the minds
and hearts Of the children. n.-Christian
Register.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1908-03-20

He who waits to do great deal Of
geedNat once will never do any
Scottish Reformer.