Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-08-09
FORCED TO UMPIRE
Jack Sheridan Was at One
Time a Ball Player.
RELEASED WITHOUT A CENT
Tries to Chop Down Trees for a
Living.
MAKES A SAD FAILURE AT IT
Life of Arbitrators in Olden Times
Not a Bed of Roses-An
Umpire Story.
RELEASED WITHOUT A CENT
MAKES A SAD FAILURE AT IT

get good Job as q burglar or StOker
on an ocean liner. He says it is only
when a man is down and out that he will
accept a position as umpire. Sheridan
said that before he himself would take
the place fate threw him down. kicked
him in the ribs and blackened his eyes.
Sheridan was playing second base for
the Sacramento (Cal) team when fate de-
cided to take hand in his affairs. He
was playing a fast game for that team
and attracted the attention of the Mont
gomery (Ala) manager. The Montgom-
cry team was hitting up fast pace In
their league, but the management thought
they needed a fast second baseman and
that Jack was just the man they were
looking for.
After some dickering Sheridan was sold
to Montgomery, and advance money and
ticket to that city were sent to him.
GUS life Of youth, SO he thought he need
ed vacation before taking up his duties
with the Alabama team. For several
weeks. therefore. the Montgomery fans
looked in vain for the star player who
they thought would round up their team.
Finally, after taking his little fling.
Jack packed up and trotted across the
continent to Alabama. On the day Sher-
idan showed up in Montgomery there was
great rejoicing among the fans. Then the
fates got busy on the job. The team had
been winning steadily, but as soon as
Jack Joined in the ARRAY they started to
lose. and lost sixteen straight games. AL
though Jack was playing good game
during this time all the blame was laid
on his shoulders.
Released and Fined.
When the sixteenth game was lost
Sheridan was released and fined the
amount of his back salary. He was
thousands of miles from home and broke.
He started to walk home, having moth
ing else to do, and managed to make
about fifty miles.
By that time Sheridan was up against
1t SO badly that he was willing to do al
most anything. Il was almost ready to
become an umpire" Jack says. But not
quite. Fate had to give me a few more
raps before I was willing to descend Sc
low"
Finally he reached a logging camp away
out In the woods and he explained to the
boss that he was the greatest little log
ging expert that ever happened. AL
though his ability in this line may have
been slight his ability as q talker won
the day and he was given an ak and told
to go out and chop down trees.
AAASS OAOPPAA6 " OO0s
Jack. although a truthful man. was
not in the habit Of chopping down cherry
trees when a boy. SO he hadn't the slight
est idea of how to 60 about it. He chop
ped first on one side and then on the
other until he had cut a little ring all
around the tree. At the end Of the day
he had not finished even the one tree.
While he was figuring on stopping work
one Of the men came out from the camp
with a team Of oxen to haul back the
load that Jack was supposed to have
ready.
where is your trees?" said the woods
Here it is" answered Jack.
do you mean to say that is all you
have done all day long?" the woodsman
asked.
"of course" said Jack. Look how
big 1t Isl
Then he started chopping to finish the
job SO that the oxen might haul the log
back to camp. OF course, Jack had no
idea about the way to chop tree in Or
der to have it fall in any desired direc-
ton. SO he whaled away haphazard with
the result that the huge tree toppled over
squarely on the backs of the unlucky
oxen.
The woodsman when he saw his yoke
killed. picked up the ak and started after
Sheridan. Jack stood not upon the order
Of going, but beat the worlds record. or
at least 60 he claims, for the next half
mile.
Then Jack was up against 1t for fair.
He was afraid to go back to the camp
like ak and he didn't know how to find
his way out Of the woods. For several
days he wandered around in the woods,
living by himself. as an umpire should,
and grubbing in the dirt for roots to eat.
After keeping alive in this way for a
Nd {xy:r1O a nf
men. hated, as he thought, by every one.
Jack managed to make his way out of
the woods and got word to Peck Sharp.
who then was playing for keOkuk in the
Three-Eye League.
Peck" he wrote, II have been living
on roofs and weeds. Every mans hand
is turned against me. I've had hard
knocks Of all kinds from every one meet.
SO that now I think am ready to take
a job as umpire"
An Umpire Story.
In the old days when the wild west was
really woolly the umpire used to have a
hard Job and had to be q man who was
able to look out for himself under all cir
cumstances. OF course, not wishing to
have too many MURDERS both for the sake
of the good name Of the town and be-
cause the supply Of umpires was limited.
the base ball magnates used care In hiring
One day there came into the Office Of
the manager of the Ell Paso team bat
tered-up individual who looked like he
had been blown up in an explosion and
then run through a sieve.
''Got a place for good nervy umpire?"
he asked.
Eyes. we have a place." he was told
but we need a man with real nerve
and not a ladylike. eastern umpire. Do
you think you are brave enough to buck
up against a crowd Of cowboys when
the home team Is losing?"
Sure" said the battered-up individual.
'If I didn't have nerve I'd a quit the
business long ago. See this eye?" he
asked, taking out a glass eye. IT lost tina
down at Rattlesnake junction. See this
hand?" he queried. unscrew1ng a wooden
hand. "a real bad actor shot that off
when called him out at Meza creek 1
lost three fingers by calling the game on
account OF darkness at Scorpion Center
two years ago, and this cork leg is the re-
suit Of a strikeout by Peevfsh Pete of
Mesquite"
you're hired" said the manager
What salary do you want?"
''Well, All dunno" answered the bat
tered man. II think a good umpire
ought to get about hundred a month,
but as / am only about a quarter OF q
man I'll let you off for $25."
ANOTHER PHENOM.