davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
THE GLORIOUS DEFICIT.
Which Party Can Issue a warrant
of Arrests

"hich Pnrty Cnn Issue a Warrant
of Arrest.
From the New York Sun.
Contemplating with serenity the fact
that the appropriations made al the first
session Of the Sixtieth Congress exceed
N.coc.coooQO for a single fiscal year. our
neighbor the Tribune points to this graft
Tying and reassurlng circumstance:
Fortunately there is still an excessive cash b,l,1c.
IN the Treasury and tho le0lO9 deficit can be casiiv
met Congress will undoubtedly be called on 10 NJ,
wise the tariff and additioua, taxes can then he laid
70 foTtifT the Treasury.
Timely deficit Here IS an opportunity
TO reduce the annoying cash balance I'm
the Treasury.
Auspicious occasion, The opportune
largemindedness OF the Sixtieth Congress
in the matter Of appropriations opens
the way for heavier taxes at the next
revision Il the tariff
How would It do to put both the fore
going sentiments in the Chicago plat
form and go to the voters with them?
The unimaginatlve Tilden, represent
ative Of all that is misery and archaic in
national financiering. said just forty
years ago: These monstrous and ap-
palling amounts bear heavily upon every
mans income, upon every industry and
every business in the country. When
values recede and sink toward their nat
ural scale the taxgatherer takes from
Us not only our income. not only our
profits, but also a portion Of our capital.
We must arrest this system. or all that
has made this country great and glorious
and that has distinguished II from the
empires Of the Old World in the benef-
cent operation Of our political and social
system upon the masses of the people
and upon the industrious millions will
have disappeared"
Arrest this system of extravaganza
Which party is ready to issue the war
rant OF arrest?
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Which Is OIdestf

This" said the actress sweetly. pre-
senting q bright, well-preserved lady. lis
my mother"
"One would never guess It to look at
her"
Don't you notice resemblance"
Yes; II is plain enough. but she looks
too young
That is complimentary"
mo; it is just a matter OF observation.
BY the way, l would like to ask you a
question. l hope you will not be Of
Tended"
mo danger. What is it?"
Are you older than your mother or
younger?"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
RooseveIt's Popularity.

From the Cincinnati Times-Star.
Speaking OF the recent spectacular visit
Of the President of the French republic
NJ Fallieres. TO England, the London
Spectator remarks: "Only one other man
in the world could evoke the popular
enthusiasm In England that greeted Fall
Heres. and that man Is Roosevelt" =
Apparently, John Bull Is not as sleepy
In regard to American affairs as he
seems.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Advice TO Bachelors.

From the San Antonio Express.
Don't marry the first girl you fall
in love with; wait till you have seen
the Others" advises the Montgomery Ad-
vertiser. This recalls the story of the
maid who went through the thicket
in search Of a perfect stick. leaving
many good ones behind, in the hope OF
finding something better, until near the
end Of her journey she had 10 take a
crooked one at last. The trouble with
some cid maids and old bachelors Is that
they are too particular
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Disintc.cstedness.

From the Louisville Couricr7Journal
Henry Watterson says no loyal American should
refuse the nomination for the Vice Presidency
What's the matter with Bryan and Watterson for
the Denver ticketg-Omaha Bee
Nothing, except that he doesn't want
Il and that nobody wants him, and that
because he wore a gray jacket mis- nom-
ination would defeat the ticket and at
the same time disgrace him, by giving
the lie to his profession of disinterest-
edness
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
New One Each nay.

From the New Haven Register.
II Is a duh day. in this gledsome ocm-
paign season. whose low descending sun
does not flash its mellow light upon the
aspiring hopes of some new, confident.
and perfectly equipped candidate for the
Office Of Vice President on the ticket with
William Howard Taft.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
LINES OF LAUGHTER.

From the Nashville American.
The Tyrants.
johnson must have 10 walk chalk at
home"
Why so7"
His wife is almost twice as large as
he is
Don't worry about him. II is the
wives who are only half as large as their
husbands who are the tyrants"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

do you realize that It Is only five
months now until w. j. Bryan will be
the President-elect?'' inquiries a contem-
porary Doubtless that is comforting to
the Democrats; but they won't feel per-
feetly easy about 1t until the said five
months have passed into history.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
The stinEiest Man.

From the Danviile Advocate
Gallatin claims to have the stingiest
man in Tennessee. II not in the world,
and a premium is offered for his superior
in closefstedness. He got married to a
home girl 10 save expenses. They walked
around the square for a bridal tour. He
bought her a nickers worth OF stick
candy for wedding present. and then
suggested that they save the candy for
tha childreu
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
ARE YOU GOING AWAY?

Subscribers who leave the city
temporarily should not fail to
have THE WASHINGTON
HERALD follow them. Ad-
dresses will be changed as often
as requested. You cannot keep
fully informed about affairs In
Washington unless your paper
comes TO you daily Before
leaving, mai; or telephone your
address TO this Office.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
To A BAhKY MUSE.

TO A BALKf MUSE.
Now Pegasus stands still;
Yes. quite.
And l can think Of nil
To write.
The words with which plead
But prove
In vain. The stubborn steed
Won't move.
Yet I must fiil my space
Make good
Or 1 can't feed my face
With food.
Come, be a kindly Peg,
Old chap.
Bestir yourself. / beg.
Giddap!
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

II Senator ~Jen" Davis had only kept
his eye glued 10 the octopus instead Of
chasing of TO Arkansas every few days.
Senator La Toilette might look upon him
nowadays with more favor as a pros
pective partner in the business Of keep
Ing the lid of In this country.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
OfCourse.

Remember, a book play needs BOOM
ing"
I'm getting some OF the best citizens
10 say a good word for our production" &"
Bah. Youn never make a press agent.
What you want to do Is TO get 'em 20
denounce it,"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

That New Jersey man who wants a
divorce on the ground that he was crazy
when he married would probably be all
right II he could get a married jury on
his case not afraid TO talk right out in
meeting
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Nntnrc FnI.cs ON Teddv.

From the Baltimore News.
Since the name Of the yacht Of John
Ayres and George Cubbler, the Boone, in
Delaware has been changed to Teddy, the
boat has been stopped by an eel, and re-
Gently II was discovered that the tank
had been filed with lemonade instead of
gasoline
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
True Blue.

I'm afraid" faltered the young man.
that l can't support YOU in the style to
which you are accustomed"
Never mind that" responded the girl.
Il can accustom myself 20 the style ia
which you can support me"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

"The Chicago News thinks x" repre-
sents Roosevelt in the forthcoming Re-
publican convention. What some people
hope is that "ex" represents him after
March next.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

A Frenchman and an Englishman Of
title are discussing whether American
women make good wives. Americans
think they do. al right; and they would
appreciate II, perhaps, II the foreigners
would let our girls alone.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

the population is afflicted with II. No
wonder some people are inclined TO be-
lieve that civilization is a blessing in
disguise. II It really is blessing at all.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

Now that the cruel warfare is over in
Georgia. the common people" will pro-
ceed 10 sit down and wonder why all
those good things promised by the candi-
dates fail 10 show up.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
wins Them literally.

No more do armies seek the fray,
In shock of battle join.
A soldier wins his spurs to-day
BY tossing UP q coin.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

A Michigan paper longs for two satur-
day nights in every week. That paper
is not apt TO be popular with small boys
who look with more or less horror toward
the approach OF the regular weekly bath
night"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Chorus Girls Delight.

From The Baltimore NeWA
A hundred million Holsters have been
turned loose by the government hatchery
experts. Stark famine no longer threat
ems the chorus girls Of the land.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Quite HopefuI.

''Skroggs is the premium optimlst."
What has he done now?"
He was out looking for his seeds to
grow this morning"
why not?'
He hasn't planted them yet"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

A Texas paper dubs all umpires rob
bers" The umpires probably do not
mind in the least, however. They have
been called everything but mollycoddles.
and so many times that they are used 10
H. too
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

The prohibition campaign in Tennessee
seems to have reached the usual intoler-
ant and abusive stage The sooner they
get It over the better for all parties con-
cerned
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

Pianos in the fats above are better
than roller skates" observes a contem-
porary. Which is the same as saying it
is as well to be slaughtered for a lion as
q lamb
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

II Mrs. Hetty Green gets much gayer
with her money, she is apt 10 attract
the attention Of King Peter OF Servia.
who is said 10 be on the carpet for a
helpmeet with plenty OF the wherewitbal
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Censed tn Worry.

Don't you worry sometimes. lest your
witticisms give offense?"
II did once" answered the press hu-
morist. but now I have about come to
the conclusion that nobody ever reads
these alleged jokes"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
ExnIained,

What ls a parlor sociallst?"
"A lady who believes IN parlor social
ism"
But what Is parlor socialism,
"A belief that all gossip should be
held In common"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
The NoreIty shocIzr.

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Atlantic City can endure bathing suits.
but not sheath gowns It's the novelty
that conveys the shock.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

"Brer Hartman, he lay low" OBJ
serves the Birmingham Age-Herald.
Sure; this is exactly and precisely his
day TO do that thing.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

The '1et-us-alone" man is more than
apt to ind himself lonesome enough be-
fore the end Of the pending Presidential
campaign. He need not worry
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

lie jests at bars that never tried TO
cultivate the acquaintance Of a timid
'1lind tiger In q prohibition State.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

Politics makes strange bed-fellows. but
doesn't reduce the board bin.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Works Sometimes.

Keeping your word TO that fellow, Ell?
Yes said the professional sharper.
somewhat shamefacedly. He seemed
to take it absolutely for granted that I
would"
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

John Johnson is an ex-baseball player
and an ex-newspaper man. You can't
keep that sort Of man down.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

The adjournment Of Congress, unfor-
tunately. doesn't mean the adjournment
OF the gabfest.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

What the average man wants Is a sup
ply OF elastic currency 70 take the place
OF the ordinary illusive currency.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

A lot of people who do not believe in
ghosts shy at the Roosevelt third-term
spook still.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
Couldn't Hire Help.

"How's farming?"
No chanst fer a crop"
But the weather's good"
Sos the fishin'."
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

a number Of cotton mills have closed
recently but the fish yarn output is quite
up 10 the usual standard
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

Before the appearance of the white
man in Alaska, tuberculosis was un-
known in that land. Now 40 per cent of
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

ABE" Ruef has been acquitted. not
wIthstanding the fact that everybody is
perfectly certain he got the money.
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08
The Omen Sunday.

What are the wild second-elective-
term waves saying?
The Washington herald., 1908-06-08

Karl Lundborg. Of Stockholm. Sweden,
is at the Arlington Hotel Mr. Lund-
borg Is financially interested in steam
ship freight traffic. Speaking about bus
mess In Europe. he said that a COM
pany with head offices at Sandetiord.
Norway. had recently been formed. with
the object OF exploiting the whaling
grounds adjacent 10 the South African
coast. particularly that Of Natal.
There is 10 be a station at Durham"
continued Mr.. Luadborg. where a plant
for extracting oil and bone will be es-
tablIshed. The method 10 be pursued will
be the same that has been adopted with
success in Norway, and the men engaged
IN the work will be Norwegians. who
have had experience in the industry.
Briefly, the plan is 70 use two small
whaling steamers, which have been ac-
quired by the company, and making Dur
ban the base of operations. to scour the
ccastwlse waters, and as soon as a whale
Is taken. TO tow the body into the h2r-
Dor, where the work OF extraction will
be done. BY this means Il is said that a
saving OF time is effected, and the process
OF reduction is facilitated.
1T is claimed that these steam whalers
are able TO take all kinds Of whales with
comparative immunity from risk. as the
explosive harpOon is fired directly from
the steamer. and the danger Of pursuing
the FISH in small boats is obviated. There
are large numbers OF whales near that
coast, and there seems TO be a fair pros
pect Of success for a small company.
run on the most economical lines. The
capital of the company is 5000 and
shares 20 the full amount have been
! taken In Natal and Norway"
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

ehildrenz only see seven or eight around.
 $. The dog houss fell down on em and killed all the rest but six, an they are out diggin sas- safras.
 Where are all your dogs2
 S.-Got none but Rowler, Growler, Ringwood, Springwood, the old mother with seven pups and our main leader, Old Bose We're just out 0 dogs, but John < gone arter some.
 T.-Do you hunt much nowz
 S.-No sir, don't hunt much. I hunt bear, deer and turkey when hunt.
 T. My friend, can You give ne any information about your country herez
 S.-Yes sir. guess 50. Nat sarrerS dled last week and 9as buried near Seed Tick college.
 T I don't mean neighbor- hood news. l want 10 know something about vour country.  What is your largest and most sure crop here3
 S.-Ghilduru.
 T.. Laying aside jokes, what is vour largest average eropz
 $. -Childafa.
 T Have you always lived here2
 Nozfr, l aiat Tt 55 years old. and tast aiu't always by a durn sight.
 T Whats the matter with your oornz II seems to all be turning yellow.
 $ Yes sir, planted he yaIler kind.
 T Won't have n ere than half d crop, i'll you?
 $ No sir, planted her on the shears
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28
Baby Hands.

will get into mischief often 1t means d burn or cut or scald. Apply Ballard's Snow Liniment just as soon as the accident hap pens, and the pain will be re- lleved while the wound will heal quickly and nicely. A sure cure Tor spralns, Rheumatism and all pains.
 Price 25e, Soc and S1.OO a bottle. Sold by ". G. Ownbey.
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

that ole gum log thar when l want to set down.
 T.-IS this river down here fordable3
 S.-Yes sir, guess she is. Case the ole woman : ducks ford ed her yesterday.
 T.-How far is it to Little Rock
 S.-Don't know anythin 2 about LITTLE rock, but thar's q durn big rock down here in my field.
 How far k t to the next house.
 S.=Don't know, sir, never was thar
 Well, do you know who stays l1erez
 Yes, l reckon 50.
 T.-Well, as l am 50 bold then what might your name be:
 S.-It might be Dick, Tom or Harry. Bat t likes right smart bein' either.
 T. Sir. will YOU tell me where the road goes to.
 5. Its never gonc anywlar since l been here. It's always been thar when git up every mornin.
 How faris it to where it forks
 S.-lt don't fork at all, but 1t splits up like the devil,
 T.-lIoW long have YOU been living here?
 S. Hain, been Twin here at all, just been stayin, here.
 T.-Well, how long have you been here?
 S.-See that big mountain over thar!
 T.-Yes.
 Well, that was thar when cum here.
 T.-Where are all of youI
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

take the left hand. When you git about mile or two on that, you may know you are wrong, for thar ain't no road thar. You'll think you're durned lucky ef you find your way back to my shanty, whar you can come an play that thar tune as long as you please.
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28
The Unwilling Hero
Tn Startling AdVenfure and
 FaScina1inG MYSfery

young man arrives Francisco dusk. He knows but person all that great citya Of his age Within the hour the cousin murdered and the stranger plunged the conspiracy Fate him by the hand. Luck points the way. Crcum- stances blind, but reentess rob him of his ghu and cheat him of his identity They make him the champion of a he heard of the leader of sprators and lover of girl he dreads win. Cunnngy attacked by unknown assailants and cunningY guarded by unknown defenders he the center q dramatic and relentless struggle.
 Both the reader and the hero are blndfolded." Both quite innocent the past they ignorant of the future. The present. full ystey and adventure, IS all they handle. But very gladly and together they fight against an enemy with friends unknown, and for stakes undreamed of.
 Those qualities, whatever they that in mystery fascinate us in adventure charm us, qualities that dominate the pages of
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

Col. Sandy Faulkner, the orig inal personator of the "Arkan- saw Traveller, was born in Georgetown, Scott Co.,, Ky. on Friday, March }. 1908. He moved to Arkansas in 1920 and settled Tn Chlcot county, on the Mississippi River, as a cotton planter. He remained III his po- sition as cotton planter ten years, taking up his residence in Little Rock in 1880, where lie died on Tuesday, August I, 1874, at the age of T years, , months and one day. His death, though hourly expected, cast deep gloom over the entire country. The rich and poor, high and low, all loined as pall-bearers and mourners. He died loved and 1amented by all who knew him. The story of "The Arkansaw Traveller. 1t IS said IS founded on an incident which occurred dur ing the campaign of 1840, when Col. Faulkner was making the tour of the state as d candidate for official position and honor. One day, in the Boston Moun- ta1ns, Col Faulkner and his par ty approached dilapidated looking log hut tor information of the route they were travelling, and Col. Faulkner was made the spokesman for the occasion, and 1t was upon his witty responses that the tune and story were founded. On his return to Little Rock, q grand reception was giv- en him, at which he Was called upon 10 play the une.and tell the story.
 From that time onward the popularity of the tune and the story have never been questioned.
 It IS now known from the north ern border of Canada to the ever glades of Florida, aud from the Atlantic Ocean on the east to the Pacific Ocean on the west When he subsequently, visited New Orleans, the fame of The ArkanSaw Traveller" had long since gone ahead of him, and al reception g1ven him here, he was handed a violin by the then Governor of Louisiana, and re. quested 10 favor them with "The Arkansas Traveller At the old | St. Charles Hotel, in New Or leans, d special room was devoted | to his use, bearing in large gol- den letters over the door, Ark ansaS Traveller. The following IS the
 DIALOGUES:
 Traveller Hello, stranger.
 Stranger. Hello, yourself T.-Can l get to stay all night with you
 S.=No, SIT, you can't git to. T. Have you any spirits here2 $. Lots uy 'em; Sal seed one last and il like to skeered her to death
 mistake my meaning. Have you any fiquor2 s Had some yesterday but old Rose got in the pot and lap Ped | all out.
 T. You don't understand. Il don't mean pot liquor. I'm wet and cold and want some wlliskey. Have you any
 S.-oh, yes. Me and Sal drunk the last this megnin'.
 Tim hungry, haven't had
  q thing to eat since last night. Can't you give me something to eat?
 S. Haint durned thing in the house. Not moufful of meat, nor q dust of meal.
 T.-Well, can't you give my horse something?
 S.-Got nothin' to feed him OH.
 T.-How far IS 1t to the coun-
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

| f
 S.-My house leaks, thar's on- ly one dry spot in 1t, an me an Sal sleeps thar.
 T-Why don't you finish COW ering your house and stop the leaks?
 $. It's been rainin all day.
 T. Well, why don't you do it in dry weather?
 S.-It don't leak then.
 T.-As there seems to be noth- Ing alive around your place ex- cept the dogs and children, how do you do here, anyhow?
 Pretty well, l thank you, how do you do yourselfz
 IT mean what do you do for a living.
 S.-keep hotel and sell whis- key.
 T.-Well, I told YOU I wanted some whiskey.
 Swell, told you He an Sal drunk 1t all.
 Tim sorry your whiskey's all gone, but my friend, why don't you play the balance of that tune?
 S.-It's got no balance to 1t.
 IT mean why don't YOU play all of it?
 S.-Look here, mister, can you play the fiddle?
 T.-Yes, little, sometimes.
 S.-You don't look like tid- dler, but If you think you can play any more onto that thar tune, you can just try 1t.
 IThe traveller here took tn tid- dle and played all of the tune.
 $. Mister, took a half dozen cheers and sot down. Sal stir yourself around here like six horse team in a mudhole. Go around in the hoIler wIar killed l that deer this mornin. cut off some of the best pieces, an foteh 1t al cook 1t for the stranger. Move tile board under the head of the bed, and git the old black jug I hid from Dick, and gin Us some whiskey. Til, drive old Bose outer the bread tray, and climb up into the loft and git tile rag that's got the sugar tied in 1t. Dick, carry the man $ horse round under the shed, and gin him some fodder and corn. Much as lie can eat.
 Dad, there ain't knives enuff for to sot the table.
 S.-Yes there is. Whar's big butch, little butch, ole case, cob handle, granny's knife and half handle? That's enough to set any gentleman's table, out'n you lost em. Durn me, mister If YOU can't stay as long as you please, and I'll give you plenty to eat an drink. Will you have coffee for supper
 Yes sir, if you please.
 S.-TIl be durned if you dc for We ain't got CT. Play away mister, you can sleep on the dry spot tonight.
 IT After tiddling about two hours Ny friend can you tell me about the road I'm to travel to- morrow
 S. l omorroW. Mister, } o Il won git out'n these diggins for six weeks. But when 1t gifts 50 you can start, you see that big sloo over thar2 Well. you'll have to cross that. then you take the road up the bank, and i'll about mile you come to two and-a-half acre corn patch. The corn's mitily ill weeds but you needn't mind that, .jist ride on. Well, about q mile an half rum thar you'll come to the durndest swamp you ever struck. It's boggy emf to mire saddle blanket. Thar's a fust-rate road about fifteen feet under thar though.
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28

S.-You can't get at 1t. We'll, about mile beyont you'll come to place whar thar's no roads. You can take the right hand, ef you want to. You foller 1t mile or so, and you'll find it runs out. You then have to come back and
The Springdale news., 1908-02-28
"ARkANSAW
 TRAVELLER. ,
How it Originated. and the Orig inal Dialogue as Printed
 Back in the Fifties.

The following story of the "Arkansaw Traveller" was copied by Marion Mason. of Johnson, from one of the original pamph- lets published ill the sos.