The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1908-10-16
THE PERFECT MAN.

alberta said dolefuly, arranging the
cushions on the box coach SO that the
becoming red one would be nearest
her face, and don't like it. My dis
like is not founded so much upon
moral grounds as from a regard for
my complexion
"Eh?" remarked Mr.. Terhune, help
lessly. Your conversation. my dear
liberia, often seems involved. Your
remarks are sometimes not as lucid
that is-as intelligible-as one might
desire"
Perhaps l am forgetting that the
young or very feeble are fed on pre-
pared food, John-and the rule prob
ably applies as much to the mental as
to the physical she said with much
petulance.
Nov, my dear girl, do not fly off
into a psychological discussion for
either nature defrauded me or they
left out something in my college
course-I don't know which. The
only thing 1 want to know is-why
being cynical should affect your COM
| pleXion.'
That's easily explained-it takes
the sparkle out of my eyes, it draws
my mouth down at the corners and
uSSIIOsS Ivy uiluplc-duO, " Gap IAS
climax, it makes me wonder if there
is living, breathing man worth mar
ceiling my hair for. So, when l get
in a cynical mood l go round straight
haired, thin Tipped, with listless ex-
preston that makes me positively
homely."
But my dear child" protested Mr..
Terhune, II could run in almost any
time to admire the marcelled hair
and if l didn't happen to come at the
psychological moment you could'phone
me at any minute and l would be de-
Observation-Disclosures to rush to adj
mire-just count on me for any old
time," he added graciously.
"John-you are at intervals-posi-
lively foolish she said severely, try
| ing to select from the box in her lap
chocolate that contained nut.
II am tired of being admired by
plain, everyday men,"
Like me ~ he suggested amiably.
II didn't say 1 was rude or impo-
lite enough to call you names-I
merely said I was CYNICAL she de-
INJURED.
"Oh-call me plain, everyday man,
| if you like" he conceded graciously
eff it makes you feel one tiny bit
better, to work off your cynicism on
me, Lady Fair. 'Tis sweet to die for
l-er-I'm willing to help you out all
l can. So you want the marcel to be
admired by some wonderful being
alberta, my child, don't you think a
perfect man would let his thoughts run
upon-er-scientific lines-and not
undulations in-hair lines ?"
HE wouldn't, I'm sure, labor I'M
der the impression that he could make
puns," she shifted disdainfully.
Even if he didn't make puns-he
might be disagreeable in other re-
spects," suggested Mr.. Terhune, hope
fully. His very projections, my dear
girl, would make him clear sighted
enough to see the imperfections of
others. Now I think you are perfect,
but he would probably not take you
at all on account of your imperfec-
tons"
Indeed L? Would you enumerate
them ?'' The tone struck Mr.. Ter
hume as being slightly icy, but-how-
ever foolish-he evidently was not
lacking in bravery.
eff you will, for once let me as
sumo that 1, even 1, am a perfect
man, perhaps 1 can give you few of
the ideas he might entertain"
pray dot cannot fail to be inter-
esting," freezingly.
THAT reminds me. l met Miss De-
land on the street this Afternoon, and
| never in my life saw so perfect a
profile. She is the exact type that
would make a suitable mate for your
perfect man. And l think she has the
daintiest little nose I ever saw" re-
miniscently.
Elberta redeemed slightly. She had
always wondered if her nose were not
a trif1e large, and her fingers uncon-
sciously flew to her face to be passed
furtively over the suspected member.
And she always makes herself so
entirely charming-she doesn't seem
to be moody-one could not imagine
her ever being-er-rude. She is an
ideal feminine character, a perfectly
womanly woman-she would give her
husband just the proper amount
of alteration to stimulate him
to success - she wouldn't expect
the perfect man to waste time
in admiring a mere wOman-a frail,
impulsive, whimsical woman. The
perfect man, my dear, would proba-
bly-at least, possibly-be the centre
of attraction himself. I can imagine
that his wife would occupy the subor-
dinate position of second fiddle
alberta sat quietly stroking her nose
with her finger, evidently deeply alb
sorbed in thought.
"JOhn-do you think my nose is
very larger" she asked timidly, al
most humbly.
"Oh, | have seen few larger" de-
clared Mr.. Terhune airily.
1t is hard to have ones sensitive
point so negligently handled-and
the girl looked at him in grieved sur
prise. Il had no idea you were so
disagreeably critical-of course l
never thought 1 was beauty-but l
can't help the size of my nose"
"Of course you can't" consolingly-
nobody can blame you for it," he de-
clared piously. 1--WE should not blame
people for their misfortunes-we
should sympathize."
She looked at him for a second
) tears of modification in her eyes.
you are cruel,' she said in muffled
tones from the depth of the red pillow
where she buried her face.
Mr.. Terhune without her eyes upon
him, permitted a look of satisfaction
to creep over his face.
Wouldn't it be awful to live in the
same house with a man so perfect
himself that he never noticed your
eyes or hair-who perhaps has SO
perfect a nose that he would make