davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
SMILED At THE WRONG TIME.
overabundant Sense Of HumeR a.
Times Proves Costly.

When Laugh and the world laugha
with you" was written. the author took
no thought OF the sutocraue ones of
the earth who cannot see themselves
In anything approaching a ridiculous
light.
II is related that the present car
OF Russia, returning once from u long
journey. was weary and In no mood
To be trifled with. As he was pass.
Ing through his apartments he slipped
on a bearskin mat that lay on the
polished floor. Clutching at one of
his attendants. he nearly brought him.
self and his support to the floor.
Baron EnidoR. at the time a conf.
dental adviser, could not check
smile, which his monarch turned just
In time to observe The next day
Enidon was dismissed from his Of.
fee, and lost the 100000 attached to
the post.
Another ruler who Is not to be trifled
with Is William OF Germany. Cough
Milbanke, a clever but blum Scot, who
was an expert in colonial administra.
ton. was once taken mp by the kaiser,
who wished his advice on eastern af.
fairs. and had decided to give him
an important position to guard Ger
man interests in China. At one OF
their conferences the kaiser made an
absurd suggestion as to eastern diplo.
macy. Milbanke laughed. The EN-.
peror wished him a frigid good night,
and never received him again.
Another Scottish administrator, Dun.
can McVea, was advising the late pleas.
ant but touchy king OF Portugal, who
had planned to put the shaky govern
ment OF the Cape Verde islands in the
hands Of this skillful manager. The
king became much excited, and made
a ludicrous botch OF his English. which
was usually excellent. McVea smiled
audibly, and was promptly ordered
away. He was never appointed to the
governorship, which carried salary
Of $4,000.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
The Maxim Of a IournalIst.

Henry II. Ashton, Virginia City
capitalist, has in his library, richly
bound In crushed Levant, those early
volumes Of the Virginia City Enter.
prise to which Mark Twain contrib.
uted
The faded pages contain innumer-
able specimens OF the famous writer's
quaint humor. Mr.. Ashton often
points out the FIRST paragraph that
Mark TwaS wrote on his arrival In
Virginia City. The paragraph runs:
"A thunderstorm made Beranger a
poet, a mothers kiss made Benjamin
West a painter and a salary of SIS a
week makes US journalist"
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
MaearonI Wheat.

ealzer's strain Of Macaroni or Kubanka
wheat il absolutely pure and is from seed
obtained from the Department Of Agri.
culture. Our strain Is Dakota grown
which laughs at droughts aud elements
and positively mocks black rust that ter.
rible scorch and would be ashamed Of
itself II II did not return from 10 TO 80 bu.
OF the finest wheat the sun shines on per
acre in good H., Ia, Mich. Wis, Ohio,
Penn, Mo, Neb., Kan. and other lands,
and 40 70 90 bu, per acre in arid lands. No
rust, no insects, no failure.
JUST SEND l0c AND THIS NOTICE
10 tie John A. Salzer Seed Co., La
Crosse, Wis, and they will send you the
moot original seed book published, 10.
Rether with free samples Of farm seeds
such ms Macaroni Wheat. Billion Dollar
Grass. Victoria Rape, Sainfoin, the dry
soil luNuriator. Bromua lnermis the des-
ert grassifer. Emperor William Oats, more
original than the Emperor himself, etc,
etc, etc.
And IL you send lee they will mail in
addition package Of farm seed never be-
fore seen by you. John A. SAlzer Seed Co.,
La Crosse, Wis, K. a w,
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
IMMIGRATION FROM
SOUTH EXPECTED
U. 9. FARMERS ARE RECOGNIZING
SPLENDID OPPORTUNITIES
OFFERED BY WESTERN
CANADA.

st. Paul. Mimi, Feb. 9, 190S.-Pres.
ent Indications are that the Canadian
Northwest will draw an exceptionally
heavy movement OF new settlers from
the United States this year. IL should
surpass the banner record for 1907.
This is not only based on the fact
that the Americans have come to
realize generally that the Canadian
Northwest offers splendid opportuni-
ties. but also because the railroads
have awakened TO the fact and are
Offering rates to the Canadian North
west which are exceptionally favor
able.
The lines which lead to st. Paul
from the east and south are offering
homeseekers rates TO the Canadian
Northwest this year which are on n
parity with those In existence to the
southwest for a couple Of seasons.
These rates can be obtained from
any agent of the Canadian govern
ment, who will be pleased to give all
information possible regarding those
districts which offer the greatest in
dueements to settlers. The weather
throughout Western Canada has been
remarkably good this year. A tele-
gram from the winter wheat belt of
Southern Alberta dated at Cardston,
Alberta, January 29th, says
This winter up to January % was
nothing short OF marvel. in fact, IL
was the finest anyone can remember
for twenty-five years though there
have been others nearly as good. The
days were fine, sunny and warm with
light frosts at night. Overcoats and
gloves, etc. we're discarded by most
people in the day time. There was
so little frost In the ground that post
holes could be dug without any trouble
after the first inch was broken
through. Winter wheat remained
| fresh and green although there has
been no snow since the September
storm. n there is an early spring,
winter wheat should gain a great
start"
Amongst the reports OF the yield
OF last year the following extracts are
taken:
II. Howe, OF Magrath. Alta, writ
| ing on November, lSOf, says: Il nave
20 acres in crop. so acres OF wheat and
seven acres OF cats. My average yield
OF oats was 35 bushels to the acre
and OF wheat IS bushels. The value
TO me was s35 per acre"
J. F. Haycock, of Magrath, writes
in November: Il had 65 acres In viii
ter wheat. which went 60 bushels tC
the acre: oats averaged so bushels.
also had IL tons OF hay worth 81
per ton. got 600 bushels of pota
toes from three acres OF land; go
eight tons per acre from Ave acres o
sugar beet"
j. f. Bradshaw, of Magrath. has
1000 acres OF winter wheat last yea
which averaged 39is bushels to the
acre. The value of his farm products
per acre was: Wheat. S3l.G0; oats
S11.20 and barley. $25l5.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

The faculty with which the New
York child grasps the new idea" in
matters educational is charmingly II.
Illustrated in composition recently
penned by a six-year-old. Her teach.
er had asked for brief compositions
on Animals Have Seen" This is
the result, written in the present day
vertical penmanship:
do you see the little robin swing
ing on the tree? Do you see the little
goldfish a.swimmlng in the bowl?
Who tenched these two to fly 80 beau
tifully together? Who struck the
feathers on their breasts? Twas God
Twas God. He done It,"
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
A Tragedy.

A Mr. Nosmo King was questioned
about the oddly OF his CT ristian
name.
1T is this way" he said; my moth.
err made a point OF giving all of her
children unusual names. l was three
months old before sine found one for
me that she liked. One day. while
out shopping. she saw on one-half of a
swinging door the word 'Nosmo.' while
the other half bore King her own
name.
"'Nosmo King, she noted mentally,
not perceiving that the letters spelled
no smoking when the doors were
closed; hence my lifelong afIliction."-
Harper's Weekly.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
Seee America a Heaven.

Prof. w. b. Elkin OF the University
OF Missouri believes that America will
be veritable heaven on earth within
100 years, and he goes on to tell why
in an article which he has written for
the American Journal Of Sociology.
Among other things which will be q
feature Of the millennium he pictures
is a reformed press. Newspapers, he
says. will be printed and edited by
the colleges.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
TIE
General Demand

Of the Uniformed OF the World has
always been for simple, pleasant and
efficient liquid laxative remedy Of known
value; laxative which physicians could
sanction for family use because its COM
poncnt parts are known to them to be
wholesome and truly beneficial in effect,
acceptable to the system and gentle, yet
prompt, in action.
In supplying that demand with its ex.
ccllcnt combination Of Syrup of Figs and
Elixir Of SIENNA, the California Fig Syrup
Co, proceeds along ethical lines and relics
on the merits Of the laxative for its remark
able success.
That is one Of many reasons why
Syrup Of Figs and Elixir Of SIENNA is given
the preference by the Well Informed.
To get its beneficial effects always buy
the northumberland by the Cali
iornia Fig Syrup Co., only, and for sale
by all leading druggists, Price City cents
per bottle.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
Mans EndIsss Quest.

AZ a great preacher once said:
Man is continually looking for his
lost inheritance OF happiness. which
the allegory OF the Garden OF Eden
prefigures. He knows 1t exists for
him somewhere. and he is ever knock.
ing. enthusiastically at the wrong
door, of selnshness. greed, ambition.
lust. all sorts of foolish doors; and We
call his mistaken seeking by name
Sim"
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
A Boston Correct ion.

BilkIns had recently moved from
New York to Boston. The other morn
ing no went 10 the butchers.
Give me a nice porterhouse," no
ordered.
Extremely, sorry. sir" said the pro-
prietor OF the establishment. urbanely.
but We are not giving anything away
this morning. Harper Weekly.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
ThlnuR Mixed,

Little Willie. who had been listening
20 some scientific talk about the
brains functions. pondered over some
new expressions he had heard. and
that night when he was going to bed
asked earnestly:
Mamma, when peoples hair begins
70 turn. is It because the gray matter
in their brains Is leaking through"
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Doan's Kidney Pills to persons suffer-
Ing from kidney disorders, backache.
etc. II Is the best remedy have
ever known and l viii gladly answer
any questions about IT,"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster.Milburn Co., Buffalo. N. Y.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
HOw'a ThisP

We ofer One Hundred Dollars Reward for aAy
case Of Catarrh tha, cannot be cured By Halle
FL. CHENEY CO., Toledo. o.
We, the UNDERLINED, have known y. J. Cheney
for the last IS years and beleye him perfectly hon
oTabie IN all business transactions and haaneiAlly
able 70 carry out any obligations made By his arm.
wALptNo, KiNHAN d hARvIH,
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, O.
HAira CataFFh Cure II taken internally, ectinR
directly upon the blood aud surfaces Of the
eysten. Testimonials sent free. Price Is cents pes
bottle. Sold by all Druggists.
Tsks HSlIs Family Piiis for constipation.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
A Neoeaaltx OF Life.

The liquor men say that Americans
every year spend less money for liquor
than for chewing gum. proprietary
medicines, candy. perfumes and hair
oil. However. Americans simply must
have hair oil.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Riches are not essential to gain
honor. Poverty should be regarded as
blessing, as 1t urges a person to
labor for himself and take the rough
before the smooth.-Bovee.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

The British admiralty IL consider.
Ing the possibility OF supplanting coal
With OIL In the mosquito fiseG the
swiftest OF England's war boata A
deet Of naval tank steamers would
3aan TIA aMnnAn s~'s~AA-A
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
Eatlnn cocoanut.custard PIe.

Everybody praises CocoRnut- CuBtaTd pie
II it's made right, but sogBy pie will
spoil the entire meal. GrocerB are now
selling "OUR-PIE," each Decent package
containing just the proper ingredients for
two pies, Get the Custard for Cocoanut-
Custard pies.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

ney and bladder Ills.
Judge Wills knows
the value of Doan's
Kidney Pills and
will answer the ques-
tons OF any sufferer
who writes to him.
The Judge says: II
tax pleasure In
A.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
OVER NINE MILLION 5000, OOO)
SOLD THIS YEAR.

Sales Lewis Single Binder cigars for
year 1907 more than. 9, 200, 900
Sales for 1905. ,,..,,,,.,.,..,S, 900, 900
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Why not the Natural laxative, Garfield
Tea? It's Pure, Mild and Potent. Made
Of Herbs Write for samples. Garfield Tea
Co., Brooklyn, n. \.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

The surer a girl is about a mans
being in love with her the less sure
she is about being in love with him.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

She-And die my Duckums do lot
OF work-work ut the Office last night?
He-A-er-yes. dear; in fact, dar.
ling, was so much occupied that
have never known time go as quickly
as II did last night.
She-Yes. dear, didn't II!
(And Dickums wasn't out late
ngainD
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

or course men are not vain, but just
tell a man OF so that he doesn't look
a day over 30 and watch the effect.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Oeln ''..,.......s....... fOOtSSS
Quality brings the business.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

1t is not easy to sting a bear with
straw.-Danish.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Mrs. WInalOw's Soothing Syrup.
Per children tsethng, s0ftans the guraS, TeAaces h
asAmation aAys palm. cares wind collie. ase bOtus
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

About the only law recognized By
love Is the mother.in.law.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

Every misfortune can DO subdued
by patience.-Socrates.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
Police JUDGE WILLS.
VIII Gladly Answer the Questions Of
any Inquirer.

II Is a generous offer that Police
Judge J. II. Wills, Of cloverport. KY.
makes to sufferers from backache. kid.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

ONLY ONE "BROMO QUlNINE"
That - LAXATIVE BKOMO QUISINu, Look fog
tho signature OF ". ". GROYE. L I'D the World
over 70 Cure n Cold In One Day. 40,
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

There is nothing I'll said that is not
iii taken.-German.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
"srown's Bronchial Troehss"

are helpful to singers. teachers and
clergymen for clearing the voice. Con.
tain nothing harmful.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

PATENTS Nv &C.: f S:a.: s e;
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05

To refuse 10 yield TO others when
reason or n special cause require 70
is a mark Of pride and Stiffness
Thomas a Kempis.
Mexico Missouri message., 1908-03-05
Why Not Open the Door?

Buy Now When You Can Get In On the Ground Floor.
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1908-05-08
ONE KILLED, THREE
. HURT IN AUTO
SMASH UP,
Robert n. Clark Of Burlington
Lost His Life
HARRY W. CHASE MAY DIE
Big Touring Car Dashss From hIah.
way Into Deep RavIns at Terrific
Speed.

Burlington, May S.--Robert O..
Clark was killed In an automobile ac-
cident at 2 O'Clock yesterday morning
on North avenue. 4. NJ. Laury, A. A.
Foster and Harry w. Chase were In
jured. Chase is In a hospital In
dangerous condition. Laury who was
the chauffeur, ran fast on the return
from Germans point. He lost con-
troll OF the machine and ran against Q
fence In the ditch.
Clark and Laury we're employed In
Collisions garage In this city and last
night about IL o'clock the party took
a Buick car owned by v. A. Billiard,
without the permission OF the owner,
1T Is said, and went out to Germain's
point where Chase has a camp.
On the return, just this side OF G.
c. Bankers place, the car became UNI
manageable, ran into the ditch, tear
ing down about so feet OF fence and
then going over into ravine where
the machine was demolished.
Clark was almost instantly killed.
Chase's back and one hip were In
Jured and he may be paralyzed. Fos-
ter's nose and one eye were hurt.
Laury was temporarily stunned and
severely bruised, but Foster and Lau-
ry were able to go to Mr.. Bankers
house where telephone messages
brought an ambulance and physicians
from the city.
All the party were young men.
Clark was "a years old and is surviv-
ed by wife, the daughter Of Col. Hen.
ry w Hall. Chase is also married.
This is the first fatal automobile
accident to occur In the vicinity Of
this city.
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1908-05-08
BENNINGTON BRIEFS
News Of the Town and Village Told
Briefly for Busy Readers.

DR.. Isaac Jennings is spending sew
eral days In Boston and New York.
Mrs, Allie Monroe and Mrs. Par.
menter left this morning for Detroit.
Mich.
Charles Kennon OF Weeks street is
convalescing from an attack OF rheu-
natism.
Joseph Jubb OF Elm street left this
morning on q fishing expedition to
Williamstown.
Charles Barnes has force OF men
ut work on A. Buel Sibley's house on
Union street repainting II.
There will be deyotions for he
| month OF May In ST. Francis de Sales
church this evening at 1880.
Joseph Broadbent of Pi.tsheld is in
town today on business connected
with the local telephone exchange.
Joseph Coyne is building a FIRE
proof garage for W ID. Newton in
the rear of his residence on Silver
street.
On account OF the absence of the
pastor DR.. Jennings. there viii be no
preaching service at the Old First
church on next Sunday.
Frank Eddy is improving the
grounds around the summer residence
II George b. Wellington preparatory
to their arrival the last OF the month.
Miss May Clark who has been
spending the winter In Washington
has arrived here and has opened her
summer residence on Catamount
lane.
There will be a final meeting of the
X. OF c. ball committee this evening,
Every member is earnestly requested
to be present as the accounts should
be closed tonight.
Mrs. Henrietta Adams has just com
pleted laying fine new cinder walk
in front of her property on Grandview
street. A few more such walks are
needed In that vicinity.
Mrs. James A. Eddy of Troy was
a guest of Mrs. John v. ID. s. Merrill
the fore part OF this week. Mr.. and
Mrs. Eddy expect to open their sum-
mer residence about the goth of the
month.
l.. c. Holton who sustained serious
injuries In the Cooper mill Wednes-
day morning Is reported to be little
better today II is now thought that
one rib is broken and two others
cracked.
A large delegation from the st.
Paul Commandery K. T. OF North Ad.
ans, arrived here on the 1880 car
Thursday evening and went directly
to Masonic hall where they were en-
tertained by the Taft Commandery of
this town. Goldsmith's orchestra was
present and rendered several selec-
tons also playing for dancing which
lasted about an hour At $3.50 the o.
Il. s. furnished an excellent repast,
EThe visitors returned on the last car
and seemed very pleased with the en-
tertainment rendered them by the To-
cal commandery.
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1908-05-08
ROOSEVELT AND TAFT
Utah Is For President With Secretary
The Second Choice.

Salt Lake City, May 7.-National is
sues figured slightly at the Republic.
can state convention today. The 473
delegates cheered resolution declar.
ing President Roosevelt the first
choice for the Presidential nomina.
ton and William II. Taft second
choice, and they cheered again when
the report of the platform committee
advocated a protective tarif, ship
subsidies. a greater navy, with four
more battleships: department of
mines and mining, the reform meas
ures urged on Congress by President
Roosevelt and postal savings banks.
But when d. o. Rideout, q Salt Lake
County delegate, offered resolution
authorizing the Republican state con.
vention next fall to nominate a can.
didate for senator, harmony disap.
peared and an acrimonious fight be-
gan.
The nomination of senator In this
manner has been urged by a faction
or the party composed chiefly of Gen.
tiles, and nicknamed the insurgents
II has been opposed by Senator Smoot
and others In control OF the regular
organization. The regulars have
maintained that the movement was
hostile to Senator Smoot whose term
expires next spring. Most of the
speeches were In favor OF the resolu.
ton, but the votes were largely
against II.
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1908-05-08
HARNESS SHOP Is YEARS OLD
Charles Z. Burt Has Been In Business
a Quarter Of q Century.

Charles T. Burt, the well known
South street dealer In harness OF al
kinds. horse clothing, horse supplies,
trunks. bags, carriage and automobile
tops, ETC., will in July Of this year eel
citrate the 25th anniversary of his
starting I'm business in Bennington.
His first shop was on what Is now the
postoffice corner and was. q small
affair as Mr.. Burt had no capital and
did all his work himself
From that beginning he has built
up the largest business OF the kind IN
southern Vermont and perhaps In the
state. His harness has built up such
"a reputation for him that people who
want a good article In that line come
here from all over Bennington, Rens-
selaer, Washington and Berkshire
counties and he'also has many custo-
mers In Troy, Boston, New York and
other places who insist on having
goods from his shop
s Mr.. Burt makes harness guaranteed
at from $50 to $40 each and from that
up as wanted. He has In his shop at
present fine line of buggy harness,
express harness. truck harness, team
harness, 4-horse team harness, etc,
to suit any demand. Besides the har.
ness made in his shop he also sells
factory made harness at from $11 to
SIS. his SIS driving harness being
beauty. He also sells factory made
team and truck harness Of all kinds.
For years one Of the specialties of
the Burt shop has been the repairs of
carriage tops and since automobiles
came into use he has added the re-
pair and recovering OF automobile
tops and this part Of his business Is
steadily growing.
He also carries complete line OF
trunks, bags grips and suit cases as
well as horse blankets, nets, whips,
halters, straps and repairs and all of
the thousand and one things that 60
to make first class harness shop.
During each year there is cut In his
shop on an average, 300 sides of the
best harness leather on the market
and each year his business makes q
steady growth.
The Bennington evening banner. (Bennington, Vt.) 19??-1961, 1908-05-08
BAY STATE WENT
. FOR BRYAN OVER
HARD ROAD
Harmony Lacking at Democra.
tic State Convention
TAFT DELEGATES INCREASING
Secretary Wins Out In Kentucky and
10 Endorsed by Wyoming Utah
Wants Roosevelt.

Boston, May with some oppos-
ition to instructions In favor OF vii
liam J. Bryan for presidential candi-
date. although such instructions were
adopted finally and with a more decid.
ed contest over the selection OF dele
gates at large, the Democratic State
convention today elected four leaders
TO represent the state at the Denver
convention.
The delegates chosen we're George
Fred Williams. OF Dedham; District
Attorney John b. Moran, OF Boston I:
ex-Mayor John w. Coughlin OF Fall
River and Daniel J. Doherty OF West.
field.
The platform adopted was In the
form OF brief. disconnected para
graphs, dealing entirely with national
issues. The closing paragraph In
structed the four delegates elected al
the convention to cast their votes In
the national convention for Bryan.
The main contest came OH the sci
ection OF four delegates and princi
pally over the name OF George Fred
Williams. For two hours Fanuel hal
resounded with shouts, cries. speeches
and motions from various party lead
ers, and the chairman had difficulty In
maintaining a semblance OF order. Al
one time he was Obliged to call on tn,
police TO clear the platform. Som,
of the speeches were extremely bitter
but all the speakers pleaded for har
mony.
A roll call on the question OF tn,
choice of the four delegates by &C
clamation was finally carried by {
vote OF 40S TO l52. The alternate.
were named without opposition. Thii
ended the days proceedings.
4 Previous to the meeting OF the con
vention there was spirited contes
within the committee on resolution,
over the Instructions plank. A com
promise was effected, and while tn,
plank was retained /. was modified s,
as to apply only to the four delegate,
elected at -today's convention. Tn,
Bryan advocates wished the instruc
tons to embrace the entire Massa
chusetts delegation to Denver.