davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Humor ano Philosophy
By DUNCAN N. SMITH
WHEN HE LIVES.

The sweet vacation season
When man from care is free
To saunter back TO nature
And loaf or climb tree,
To scramble Ger the meadows
Or Chamber through the brakes
And in secluded places
To pause and sit on snakes.
Far from the hum of traffic.
The city's noisy dill,
He sits in the surroundings
And slowly takes them in.
No need has he to worry
Nor his enga sements trim;
There is no hill collector
Who has a line on him.
The JOY of being lazy,
The fun of doing nit,
The pleasure fine in loafng.
All make with him a hit.
He looks on work as something
A sane man wouldn't do
Unless he needed money
And nothing had to chew.
Hurrah, then, for vacation,
The only time when man
Is living every minute
On natures home grown plan
And there is only haunting
This summons On his track,
That he must soon cease living.
Pack up and hurry back
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

The BARRIERS union of New York
state has declared itself against the
presidential candidate who shaves
himself, especially if he uses a safety
razor. They don't say for which of
the seven they have their shears out,
so the people can look for certificates
from BARRIERS all over the country
that they have shaved Bryan, Taft and
the other aspirants to the White
house
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Had Some Reason.

There goes man who thinks they
can't run the business without him.
Il have seen lots of cyclists like that.
but they usually discovered different
after they were fired. What position
does he hold - third assistant door
keeper or custodian of the penwipers?"
"Not exactly. He is the proprietor
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Kern's Cane of Historic Wood.

S. j. Murdoch of Alabama recently
presented handsome cane to John w
Kern, Democratic candidate for vice
president. says an Indianapolis dis
patch. 1t Is made of shittim wood. the
same wood. it is claimed that was
contained in the ark of the covenant
There are only two places where this
wood grows. 1t is asserted-Palestina
and Montesano, near Huntsville, Ala.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

You need to be quick gutter when
your wife finds you out.
Most laws are made to scare some
people and be evaded by others.
Love of applause Is the secret Of
many a near singer.
If the neighbors were what they
ought to be, probably we would be DIFF
ferent.
Too many church members are lot
more anxious about their souls saliva
ton than they are about the preachers
income.
Some people bear trials with great
fortitude-other peoples trials.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Sufficient Reason.

HE has invented an airship."
"Will it fy:"
"Of course it will"
"Then why doesn't it,"
Because it is an airship."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
They Believed II.

They Believed 1t.
"a man should jealously guard the
reputation of his word
That's so | always think about
that. This morning | went out of my
way to get Il reputation for truth tell
ing"
How did you work it?'
promised three men all running for
the same Office that l would vote for
them"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

Down in Alabama law and order
meeting adjourned TO take part in the
lynching of a negro. 1t would seem
that definitions are a little mixed in
Alabama
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

The decision of the treasury depart
ment that imported picked cells are
dutiable will be cause of general re.
joicing among fishermen. Home eels
must be protected at all cost.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
NJ atural.

II thought that you wanted that
horse so very, very bad?"
Il did,
''Well, what are you growing about
now?"
Il got it."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
No Retaliation,

"New Jersey dog catcher bitten 5000
times by dogs
Must be a meek and long suffering
man.
Not necessarily"
well, he didn't bite any of them
back
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Beat Out Some.

even laying brick is an art"
'Is it,"
Yes; it is
IF you could see some things that
are done in the name of art you would
hesitate to speak so slightingly of an
honest calling"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
THE ARGUS.

Published Daily and Weekly at 1924
Bee ond avenue, Rock Island. NJ. tEn-
tered at the postoffice as second-class
matter.l
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

Keep in mind the Rock Island ex-
position. 1t will be the greatest ever
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

The love of labor is the foundation
Of many Il fortune, but not necessarily
the iaborers.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
PERT PARAGRAPHS.

An impetuous person needs to have
resigned disposition
A fixed income is very deSirab BILE
thing unless the tendency to tiuctuate
is always in an upward direction.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
Truly.

"Ain't it awful. major?"
"What:"
'"The slang some people use"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

Now watch Peoria hand it 10 the
beautiful city of Springfield"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18
rERMs-Daily, 10 cents per week

BY THE j. w. POTTER CO.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

In order to be happy you need only
to have a conscience to fit your creed
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-08-18

TERMS-Daily, 10 cents per week.
Weekly. 81 per year in advance.
All communications of argumentative
character, political or religious, must
have real name attached for publica-
ton. No such articles will be printed
over fictitious signatures.
Correspondence solicited from every
township in Rock Island county.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05
The Commercial Club Corner

From ihe pages Of pamphlet the printer
wherever mine yields its treas
ure send forth its wondrous power
electric wheel heard the eang Of the loom
resonds finance drawn and
inexperienced willing laborer finds employment
the day with and advanced
when convinced Of their true worth
something opportunity presenting itself
The Legitimate viii find waiting
his manufactured articles but b. the
may the articles in EARTH
through he win be able successfully
pete anything aay market Of the world
factory successfully the markets
with the question unsettled To have coal where
needed cheap electric hand the fuel and power question
power turbns driven
By waters the unishd
Oklahoma Central direct from the great black diamond field Of the
ChicEasha boasts Of her excellent transportation
nemban lnehayng dvegng
575 miles within the These
added the
the the South
pointing the index finger Of Capitalization Of Industry to the
Queen Of the Washta"
MONOPOLY or ELECTRIC WATER POWER
the industry which
n should make her manufacturing
cheEaha
manufacturing There other city
Oklahoma which from small circumference all the
factors the growth Of manufacturing city
THE LARGEST INLAND COTTON CENTER.
chicsash in the midst Of the belt the
is evidenced the fact st there handled this city last
120Oe baesmoe handled
point in lhe south This linked with the reinforcing fact that place
the power
that opinion point anywhere
that offers
kinds than presented
have and refinery up
Of this easily
marketed here had tie mills that
Is good why with the
months Why in the
big the cotton mills
be located the New England states far from the material?
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05
GiDes Law on Street 702

CONTINUED from First Paga.)
the most public streets not macadam-
lied or graded and that the work re-
quired to be done as provided in this
act, shall be done between the first
day Of March ard the first day Of
December Of each year and such city
shall hare the power to pass any law
or ordinance necessary 10 carry out
fully the provisions Of this act.
Section 6los Any person liable to
perform road work as required in this
act, who, having been duly notified to
perform such work shall fail or re-
fuse TO comply with such notice and
perform such work or furnish a sub
stitute therefor as required in this
act shall be deemed guilty of a mis-
demeanor and punished BY confine-
ment in the county Jail for a period
Of ten days. or by a fine Of not less
than ten dollars nor more than twenty
five dollars or by such fine and i'm
prisonment
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05

agents
Taxing account e tie movements
and dolngs oi lhese young ladies' so
! can almost accept m e fan facs
value the assertion Of wsI-znoun
Oklah0man recently m ne national
capital. who said We are getting
50 rich out there that we are getting
afraid Of ourselves. and We want East
srn people who have had more expert
ence to help Is handle our resources
4len become milli0naires in less than
year We have the finest crops
In the country, more Oh and coal
than Pennsylvania and can furnish gas
for operating machinery at two cents
thousand foet II you have brains.
car fare and enough money for a
weeks board. Bit the grit for Oklaho-
ma
That certainly sounds good. bur its
sound is no better than those Okla
homa girls look The two together
such sounds as that re have just
quoted and the looks Of the girls
form a combination that viii be hard
to beat What Oklahoma wants Is
peopie-the right sort 81 people II
she doesn't get them after these girls
have got back home It win Be because
the effete and fagged-out East IS woe
fully unappreciatiye. We predict q
rapid increase in the population Or
the youngest state as a result CT this
missionary expedition Of the ten bellies
q Oklahoma They are winners and
they know it and all the folks back
home know It. and wsat other folks
70 know it. Nothing mean nor little
about the Oklahoma men. They are
proud Of their girls and they are en-
tirely willing that other men in less
fortunate states should see those girls.
While these missionary maids are on
their travels every man in Oklahoma
Is, figuratively shouting. Go it, gals;
ven hold your bonnets.
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05
okLAAoMA.s FAIR MIssIoNARIEl

okLAHoMA's FAIR MISSIONARIES
The Woman's National Daily. pub
Mshsd in Washington. D. C.. had this
% say on the recent trip Of a party
Of Oklahoma young ladies' through the
East
The baby sister in the family Of
states g JUST now offering the peo-
pie Of other states most convincing
and. We are almost prompted TO say,
irresistible proof Of lis scHFeness as
an abiding place for man. Ten charm
ing young women. chosen from dif-
fereut parts Of the state and each SCI
leeted for her surprising loyeliness.
are nov making a grand tour OF the
large cities Of the East. exhibiting
themselves as specimen Oklahoma
products. Surely doubt can no longer
linger with people who gaze upon the
fair missionaries, for they are in them
selves most convincing argument Of
the states claims. Their trip to the
East is proof OF the wisdom Of the
men Of Oklahoma, as well as Of the
beauty Of the women for who but
wise men and shrewd would think Of
such devices for catching and holding
the attention Of the world? They have
done and are doing many things in
Oklahoma that are SO out Of the rut
thst some people call them freakish,
but nothing they have done is more
strongly illustrative Of the acumen
and enterprise of the Oklahomans
than the sending Of this little band
Of pethcoated and befrilled young
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05
Real Estate for Sale,

80 acres Washita bottom, near Lu-
cile. extra fine land. Price $50 per
acre.
100 acres, level prairie land, 2 room
house, all fenced, good well. nearly
all in cultivation, AZ miles S. 3.
Chickasha. Price $3.50.
$50 acres, north Naples. uninprov-
ed land. good soil. Price SIS per
acre.
400 acres Washita bottom. all IN
der hog fence, very fine improve
ments, mile from Bradley Price
s55 per acre.
800 acres, miles N. E. Chickashs.
near Amber fine level prairie land.
! 17O acres in cultivation. Price $40
per acre
100 acres fine land, TX miles west
Of Tuttle This land is worth $40 but
if sold at once-price $50 per acre.
Business Chances.
One-half interest furniture and un-
dertaking, doing fine business. in
county seat town in Oklahoma. Price
$4,000.
TWO good rooming houses in Chick
asha for sale.
87room hotel, new brick building.
county seat town. Price $1,000 or
viii trade for land or merchandise.
Furniture in 20 room hotel in Chick
asha Price $4,000.
One general merchandise store do
ing fine business. in small railroad
town, Northern Oklahoma. Invoice
about $4,000
! make farm loans, sell city prop
erty I have some good ones on list
Call phone 28O
A. ]. JENKINS,
Chickasha, Okla.
Office: Basement First National Bank
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05
TRleUTE To HoNEsT TolL.

TRIBUTE TO HONEST TOLL
We build monuments to statesmen,
generals and others Of the so-ezIIsd
great Of earth.
We sing their praises and celebrate
their great deeds IN divers ways-the
great never fail 10 asst theirs
But the humble worker, the man
who tolls with his hands, whD bsiIds
his monument Who sinas Ire story q
his service to sooisty7
And yeti
The work done By the amsn with a
hoe . Ratchet trewsl paint
brush. hammer Or ehissi is just as
necessary for the welfare ofthe world
and therefore JUST as honorable as
thst performed By the man ubo writes
books. leads armies or makes laws
All honest toll is honorable
The man who works faithfully and
honestly at tie hunbls task assigned
70 him BY fate or circumstance, no
matter Mhat hIs JOB may Be, is en-.
titled 70 the same praise as is the
man Who sits n the white House ss
the nations chief executive.
Therefore i is that IN America, the
land where the nearest approach to
justice, equality and untramelsd free
dom has been made, ~s dedicate one
day u each year, wherein to give to
honest toll ito need Of praise.
All honor 70 the workers Of the
nation; al honor to the workers Of
chiekashs, whether they toll with
brain or hand.
n the very deep sense, we are al
one great family II this great na-
tion Of OURS. Some Of us are rich and
some Of vs. are poor relations but
We are bound together by the common
ties Of brotherhood. II doesn't be-
hooye any Of US TO be snvious or think
~ Of the rest We need to see more
Of tire good in each other and less Of
the faults, for there's enough bad IN
all Of us We need TO be fairer and
kinder with each other and We need
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05

to recognize the worth of every mar
who does his daty.
And 80, On Labor Day, ist vs. NEE,
as neigh5ors and brothers. Let ever
citizen q chiekashs Of every station
and every vocation, join with the forces
Of organized iabar n making the csls-
bration the success Il should and will
Be. for
I'VE are eo-workers one with an
ether"
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05

Have you seen how beautiful Mrs.
Jones dyed her plumes. mowers and
laces; even her shoes and gloves with
the Swedish Dyes to be used without
heat Or water Get it at the Owl Drug
Store, 226 Chickasha avenue, Chicka-
sha, Okla. s-20-lm
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05

Save your melted ice; It Is the pur
est Of distilled water; for drinking
purposes no mineral water equals Il
and for washing the face and hall
nothing can excel 4 dt
The Chickasha daily express. (Chickasha, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1899-current, 1908-09-05

Fine Washita bottom farm to trade
for good residence IN Chickasha-
9l1-st A. J. jenkins, Phone $50.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Since the paper on which news
papers are printed has advanced in
price until it threatens to paralyze
the press, Wisconsin manufactures
of print paper have brought forth
the proposition that newspapers in
the future be printed in white OF
black paper, thus bringing about a
saving of nillions of dollars annu-
ally in pulp wood. Black paper can
be made of old aewspapsrs and al
most any fhrous stock while white
paper requires spruce and hemlock
wood.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Samuel NJ. Foster, of Fort Wayne
Ind. is the president Of national
bank, of life insurance company
OF a hospital association, of an in
vestment company and large knit
ting mill. He is Yale graduate,
a brilliant after dinner speaker and
a good many other things, but these
are not the reasons why he is SO
popular or why his name will be
severed after he has shuffled his
mortal coin. Would you like to know
the reason? He invented the shirt
waist.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21
EXTRA WILL LLCELEBRATE
A Meeting Was Held Monday Night
and Committee on Finance Ap-
pointed. Push it Along

Taking under consideration
whether or not to celebrate the 4th
of July at Extra, the meeting de-
cided unanimously to celebrate
bigger than ever, and on motion
the following committee on finance
was appointed, and instructed to
report at the next meeting: DIR.
L. ]. Oldaker, Evans Marquesen,
Hans P. Petersen, John Dinick,
john Knox and j. o. Howard. The
meeting adjourned to meet Friday,
May 22d at o'clock at First Nation
al Bank rooms and everyone is re-
quested to be present at that
meeting.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Ten dollars do not last as long
now as ten cents did with our
grandfather's. The average man
of today spends more for socks and
suspenders than his grandfather did
for his Sunday clothes.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Hal Nantz, AudubOn's young and
brilliant attorney who is asking
for the nomination of County At
torney was an Extra visitor in the
interest of that Office, Wednesday,.
Mr.. Mantz will make good officer
should you favor him with the no.
miuation,
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Any person in Denmark who pays
the State $3.50 whom he is twenty
one, is entitled to any annuity of six
y-fve dollars when he becomes IS
years old. But If he dies before that
time the State keeps all the money.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

The royal MARINES of England are
the only sailors in the world who do
not take off their hats to their su-
perior officers. They remove their
gold trimmed hats only when the
king himself is passing them in re-
view and when they are attending
church.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

II had to sell my auto but hav-
MT missed it as YETI
"Why how's that?"
"You can get most of the sensa-
tions by cleaning rugs"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

A Corsiean widow wears strip of
black material tied on her eyes for
week, and during that period she is
fed and led about by friends. Her
house is not cleaned and no fire is
lighted for that length Of time.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Over one thousand houses in Lon
don are without regular occupants,
because of the belief that they are
haunted. Some of them are oeea-
sionally tenanted at night by tramps.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

(Which is the COW that gives the
butter milk?" asked the young lady
from the city.
''Don't make yourself ridiculous" {"
said the young lady who had been
in the country before, and knew a
thing or two, "Goats give butter
milk"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

The Island of Malta is the only
place where the remains Of dwarf
elephants are found. Hundreds of
skeletons of these miniature ele
plants have been unearthed on this
island.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Your teeth are like the stars he said
And pressed her hand 80 white
And he spoke true, for like the stars
Her teeth came out at night.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

]. r. Wise of Bristol, New Hamp-
shire made $3.50 pounds of maple
sugar this spring. The sugar sea.
son lasted foar weeks. His expen-
es were five men employed at one
dollar day and thirty cords Of
woed. He received II cents a pound.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

In Turkey the printing of any
thing can be done only under a per-
NIT from the government and type
writer's are prohibited from going
through the custom house. There
are as yet no typewriters which print
the Chinese language.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Edwin Delahoyde, wife and little
boy returned from Chicago Thurs
day evening where they expected
to have surgical operation per-
formed on the lower limb of the
little one but before the operation
1t is necessary to give other treat
ment to him for six monthe before
surgical treatment can be employed
beneficially.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

G. T. Waits and Perry Hansen
completed the purchase of lum-
Der yard last week at Lake View
and will take possession June 1st
Mr.. Waits resigned from the Green
Bay Thursday.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21
Union Memorial Service: I

There will be union memorial
services at the NJ. s. church next
Sunday at HOO o clock A. NJ. Rev.
G. A. Poison will preach the ser
men.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Henry Kroeger traded his city
residence this week to Chas. Hook
enherry for piece of lard over in
Audubon township aud then Mr..
Kroeger bought the Chas. Waits
property here in town where he and
his family will reside coon.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

It's not The thing you do, dear,
But the things you leave undone
That give you the bitter heartache
At the setting Of the sun.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21
Around the World
Theirs and Ours
The British court holds that Da-
kota divorces are invalid.
Some day it's cold,
Some day it's hot;
But what we want
Is what it's not.

A person is, chemically speaking,
torty-fve pounds of caribou and nj
trogen diffused through five and a
half pailfuls OF water.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21
$50 you're still hunting work ?"

$50 you're still hunting work?"
eyes, sir"
''Don't you know that out west
they are short of hands, and would
be willing and anxious to give you
employment"
"Sure, I do. That's the reason
l like this territory. You can 90 on
hunting for work without being dis
turbed."
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

The terrible laceratien on Mr..
Volmer Hansen's good right hand
kept him from sleep many nights.
He fears the cords are so badly cut
and torn that the hand or part of
it will be permently injured.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

James Hargrave invented the
spenning jenny in 1857. The neigh
Dors broke into his house one night
and demolished his maehine. Thew
justified by saying they were op-
posed to any new tangled institu-
tions.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21

Our old city editor, Van Hellyer
went to Omaha Saturday to have an
operation for growth on his pretty
face. 1t had the appearance of a
large mole bat Van feared for his
good looks and concluded to have
it removed before it developed into
something serious. We trust the
operation will be successful and
Van restored to his duties soon.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1908-05-21
A sunfiower eyaporates one a,

A sunfower evaporates one and a
quarter pints of water and cab
bage about the same quantity. An
acre of growing wheat; it is said
draws and passes out about ten tons
of water day, for the air contains
five grams of water to each cubic
foot of it's bulk.