Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-02-09

an opening for some opportune but
ribald interruption"
Mr.. Bradley gave loud laugh.
II remember" he said, when they
began temperance work here in Wash
ington. A series of meetings was held
in large hall. The audiences were al
ways numerous, but they interrupted
horribly. In the end an ex-prize fighter
was hired to sit every night in the
obstreperous gallery and kee's order
there
well, one night the orator contrast
ed the clean content of home life with
the squalor of drunkenness. He spoke
beautifully and at his climax he cried.
in ringing, impassioned tones:
What do we want when we return
from our daily toll? What do we de-
sire to ease our burdens, to gladden.
our hearts, to bring smiles to our faces
and song to our lips?
Here the orator paused for effect,
and the conscientious prize fighter tip
toed hurriedly to the front of the gall
lery, shook his finger at his unruy
charges and said in a threatening stage
whisper:
mind, the first Teller among ye wot
says "Beer!"-out he goes"
s.
When President Garfield was in COL
lege he was striving for honors in
Latin. His strongest rival for the
honors lived in room directly across
the campus from his own. Garfield
found out that the rival studied his
Latin the last hour before retiring
Garfield adopted the plan of studying
his Latin at the same hour-in fact. he
studied until the rival turned out his
light each night And then he studied
just fifteen minutes longer. He won
the honors. The fifteen minutes extra
each night gave him the necessary
slight advantage over the other man
in the final markings.
The man who puts forth effort az
composites results. But the man who
puts forth extra effort accomplishes
greater results.
Secretary Wilson of the department
of agriculture concluded recent adj
dress on agricultural economy with an
anecdote.
II used to know a clergyman" he
said. "who owned fine farm and ran
1t on very economical lines, SO that it
paid splendidly
Sometimes, though. I am afraid this
good clergyman carried his economies
a point or two too far.
Thus, as he was taking his usual
daily stroll over his rich, broad acres
one morning he saw plowman. while
the horses rested, sitting on the handle
of his pillow. 1t occurred to the minister
| that he paid this plowman ten cents an
hour besides board, and he stopped and
| said gently but reproachfuliy:
James, wouldn't it be a good plan
for you to have pair of pruning shears
here and De cutting a few bushes along
the fence while the horses are taking
their short rest?
Games returned the minister's seri-
GUS gaze and in the same gentle yet
reproachful voice he answered:
Look here, sir; wouldn't 1T be a
good plan for you to have a tub of
potatoes in the pulpit and while they're
singing the hymns to peel EN- for the
pot?"
A Scotchmar, having just returned
10 Edinburgh from his first visit to
Paris, was met on the street by an
old friend and fellow-countryman. who
said:
well. Sandy, mon, and when did 70
get back from PARISH
"Only yesterday. Mac"
"And did We have a fine time.
sandy?"
"Oh, yes; had a fine time"
"And did We go to the theaters.
Mac?"
Yes, indeed; 1 saw all the plays"
And did We go to the cafes, mon?''
why, of course, Mac"
well, tell me, Sandy. and did We
Gee any pomme de terre?"
'Hoot mon And | had the wife
with me all the time.'