Tensas gazette., 1908-02-07

I'm our amateur theatricals. I car.
ried off the honors." 81 was wonderine
what had become of them" ."-Cleveland
Leader.
He-But what does your father see
In me to object to? She--He doesn't
see anything in you. That's why he
.objects.-Chicago News.
7 Pell-Did Hardup ever hear from
that uncle Of his who made a fortune
out west? Mell-No, his uncle heard
of him frst.-Detroit Free Press.
de bird dat can sing an won't
sing" said Uncle Ebeu. "ain' as bad
as de bird dat can't sing and insists
on buttin' E."-Washington Star.
Ethel know he's rich, but isn't
he too oil to be considered eligible?
Edition the other hand, he is too
eligible to be considered old.-Puck.
1t often happens that man will put
himself to no end of trouble to find
the key to a woman's heart. when all
the time the door is wide open.-Life.
"Yes. Miss Pert, | am the sole re.
naming member of my family" Il
read JUST yesterday that the lobster
was becoming extinct"-Houston
Post.
$50 yoI took an ocean voyage for
your healthT "Yes." How did it
work." Il got seasick and never felt
so miser able in my life" Washing
ton Star.
''Is that John givin' the college yell
inside?' THAT amt the college yell:
the old mans fiailin' him out with
hickory, an he's givin' the home yell"
-Atlauta Constitution.
Edyth-Are you going to Niagara
Falls pn your wedding trip? Babette
No; / went there on my two pre-
vious wedding trips and believe it's
hocdoo!-Detroit Free Press.
Nell-She claims that she makes Il
point to be blind to the faults OF
others. Belle-well, she may be blind.
but she's not deaf. She likes to listen
to tales of Observation-Disclosures Ledger.
Fist Waiter-Did that Arizona
rancaman give you tip? Second
Waiter-I should say he did. He told
me |. didn't step lively he'd blow OF
the top of my head.-Detroit Free
Press.
what" asked the young physician.
"is The secret of your success?" Il
make 1t a rule to find out what a pa
tient wants to do" answered the wise
old doctor, then order him to do
it, Chicago News.
"iIr. Jones, called to ask you to
join our church" I'D like to join.
par, on. but can you wait few weeksf
That-ahem! excuse me. my new au-
tom obile isn't running yet just as 1t
should do."-Houston Post.
'11o," said Mrs. Housekeep. my
husoa Is not at home. He's out
hunting as usual" Hunting? Why,
this is the close season" Hes hunt
ing a cook. That season is always
opea."-Philadelphia Ledger.
80 be successful in politics." said
the young man, Il suppose you've got
to keep your wits together at times"
"well," replied the politician, that's
not so important as to keep your lips
together at the right. time."-Philadel-
pha Press.
riusband-Do you know that every
tire a woman gets angry she adds a
new wrinkle to her face? Wife-No, l
dill not; but IL 1t is so presume 1t Is
a wise provision Of nature TOILET the
world know what sort OF husband
she has.--New Yorker.
II you peep under your pie at the
bottom crust your hostess will be Of
feyded. II you do not take the precau-
ticn your stomach may be insulted.
Tie only safe rule in this dilemma is
to insult the one you can afford to In
81 lt-Boston Transcript.
Come, willie." said his mother,
Cont be so selfish. Let your little
b,other play with your marbles lit
tie WHILE" But" protested Willie,
ne means to keep them always" "Ohl
l guess not" II guess yes. cause he
swallered 'em."-Philadelphia Press.