The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-07-09
DRIFTWOOD
nY PHIL .. AnMsTkoN..

Time flies. but these air-shir fellows don't seem to be making So much headway --as they ought.
 man up in New Jersey has been arrest ed for cutting off another mans whisksrs Barbsrs do that every little while down this way.
 A COW up in Cleveland tossed the ownsr of the dairy into a water-trough. The sig nifieanoe Is perfectly obvious.
 The proposed sixty-two story office build ing for New York may well be termed . mansion in the skiss.'
 In the excitement attending q big fire in washington the other day saloon keep CT fell through syh. inds room rha ss supposition is that the prohibitionists had hand in this some wsy' -
 How is 1t somebody said you were very much struck with Jones when you say yoa don't even like him?"
 That's easily exDlained--we were tn an auto collision at the tiine.'
 It is said that Mir Taft never gives tips. This may have something to do with his success.
 A nIne-year-oid girl of New York Is said to have committed fifty burgiaries But then anything may be possible in Marvellous A girl in Columbus Ohio. has been of course. only tend to enhance its popu- iarity.
 Having their clothes pressed in Adam and Eves day was . simple matter as they had only to use the family Bible for the purpose.
 Nellie. you must not point like that 1t
 ''weIi mamma. just after his election heard papa say he could point with pride" The country lad hoeins potatoes Wants the business mans job in the city. And the city man sighs Tor the country
 toh. really now. ain't 1t pityo
 What kind of . creature Is t that viii the place the next?
 (Why girl, of courss-)
 Isn't 1t about time for the old boys to set get hair cut until Bryan is eiecteds
 '.pariing-I would die for your'
 "Go chase yourself--that sounds all right In e noyei--but what want is a man who will live fos ,nn.n me and pay the grocer. the butch E; H Hartman Is preachers sonf-- Exchange.
 WeIif
 A 4
 At the dinner of the French Auto Club 300 persons were poisoned eating chickens, Sort of judgment sent on 'em for the num- Der of chickens they run down annually. After all it's but a step from the engage msnt ring to the testhing-ring.
 pretty black-haired married woman told us yesterday that it's all mistake our thinking that married man has to walk the floor with the baby at am. Goodness gracious. when its little tumnie hurts, what in Sam Hill are you going to do? will somebody from the United States or Selma please Inform us before our next issusf come Is only Ssoo,ooo and he is kicking about 1t. A shane---a measly shame to put a gentleman" on such a meagre stipend.
 
 L0ngings. Where there's buttermilk and jam. Where there's mighty hunks of ham. Where there's watarimelon pickle Where there's everything to tickle Any palate In the land. Where there's biscuits that are grand Where there's chicken fried so brown Where there's gravy always 'roun'- Where there's good plain folks to iovc you Honest folks who ain't above you In tlN country on the farm, WheIS about the only harm Can befall you thero is just That you'll eaa until you Dust" Where the birds sing their refrains Down sequestered country lanes. Where tha blue sky bends above Ana the presses whisper Hove" Where the lannblIins frisk and play There I long to be away So my money I shall horde For they charge you there for boardi
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