The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1908-12-02

into vinegar and back again. Your
theory is utterly untenable."
"Just what the professor said," smil-
ed Mr.. Bowser, but I'll make you
both take back seats before another
sunset"
"But how-how?"
Where He Could Get Information.
"Why, by going to headquarters, Of
course-to the farmer himself. he is
the man to get your points on natural
history from. He is always observing;
he is always accumulating knowledge
of the things around him; he. knows
the grasshopper and the cricket as no
one else can. l shall go into the coun-
trv tomorrow and converse with about
a dozen farmers. and when | come
back Professor Schermerhorn and you
will be dead ducks and the world will
be IN idea the wiser. The next day
look out for Bowser's new discovery In
the papers,"
Say. dear" began Mrs. Bowser as
she got her pleading look on. please
give it up. Give it up right here and
now"
"W-h-a-tr'
'You are in the wrong. and you'll
find it out SO to your confusion. A
hopper never becomes a cricket"
"Give it up! Why, woman, what are
you talking about? I've got the only
chance that has ever come to me to
become famous, and you coolly sit
there and ask me to give it up. Not on
your life! A grasshopper turns into a
cricket In the fall and then back to
hopper in the spring. and I'll bet my
life on it. For 1900 years the world
has gone on in ignorance Of this fact.
and I am now going to enlighten 1t.
We must have our schoolbooks and
histories corrected. We must have less
Of Professor Schermerhorn and more Of
Samuel Bowser. I'd die before giving
It up"
"And you are going to ask farmers?'
"I am
"But you needn't go to the country
to do It. Go down on Jay street to the
Farmers inn, and you will find doz-
en- stopping there overnight. See what
they say before going out in the coun-
Try"
Mr. Bowser thought the move good
one and within ten minutes had left
the house to carry 1t out. AS he was
descending the steps Mrs. Bowser said:
II hope you will find your theory cor
rect, but If you don't you won't blame
me. will you?"
''Not at ALL was his reply. 'fYou
will In no sense be to blame. and I
wonder that you ask me such silly
question"
He found the Farmers inn. and he
found the farmers there, he selected
the oldest one of the lot and put the
case plump to him. The old toiler bit
of a new chew of his plug, thought
for awhile and finally said:
"Naybur. you are wrong. Grasshop-
pers live until about the 1st Of Octo-
Der and then change into crows. In
May Of the follerin' spring they change
back ag'in."
This was q gain over Professor
Schermerhorn's theories. but not quite
satisfactory. Mr.. Bowser tried sec
ond farmer. The victim looked at him
for minute to see If he was in ear
nest and then replied:
''You haven't quite hit it, but almost
In the fall the grasshoppers turn into
bullfrogs and burrow in the mud.
When they come out ih the spring they
60 to eatin' grass ag'in.'
A third one was approached. He
made Mr.. Bowser state his case twice
over and then called to the landlord:
'sYou want to git the police here to
take this escaped lunatic back to the
madhouse. Pm skeered O. him."
Mrs. Bowser and the cat sat waiting
when Mr.. Bowser walked into the
house. His knees wabbled; his hair
was tousled; his eyes blazed.
"Well, do grasshoppers"- she be-
gan, when he interrupted with:
MADAM, it is early in the evening
yet. You can pack your trunk and be
ready to start for your mothers by
the early morning train"
M. QUAD