davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26

stout, and the old lady promptly fell
ern science.
Even at top weight Aunt Martha
doesn't go over 154 pounds. but she
got the idea In her head that COM
pared with her Barnums original fat
lady was pikerette, SO she decided to
go after that obesity thing with an ak.
We tried to flag her and talk her
out Of it, but she waved us all back,
and said she'd made up her mind she
wasn't going through this world lead
ing double chin.
Well, Bunch. Aunt Martha starteE in
to put the sabots to the fatty tissue,
and for week Uncle Peters peace
full home across the road looked
like moving picture entitled The
Original Rough House."
First flop out of the box Mrs. Grim
shaw, who weighs 27S in her war
paint, told Aunt Martha that exercise
was the only thing to keep down the
weight, so Uncle Peter was chased of
to town for a rowing machine, set
of Indian clubs and proud assort-
ment of deaf and dumb bells.
Presently the muscle goods arrived,
and next morning about daylight Aunt
Martha jumped on board the rowing
machine and bore away to the north
west with a strong ebb tide on the
port bow.
She was about four miles up the
river and going hard when q strap
broke, whereupon Aunt Martha went
overheard with splash that upset
most of the furniture in the room and
knocked her manicure set down be-
hind the bureau.
One of the oars went up in the air
and landed on the bridge Of Uncle
Peters nose, because his face hap
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26
Thrift In chIidroo,

Some day the plan q providing for
children by starting b bank account
for each baby at birth and adding to
1t on each birthday will become gene-
al, and there will be hope Of foster
ing thrift in growing children. The,
possession Of . bank book which they
cannot wholly own till legally fres
from the guidance Of parents IL often
q matter of pride which prompts saw
ing. Everybody knows how hard It II
to save the hrst hundred dollars. and
how much the difficulty lessons with
every addition to that.
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26
JOHN / IlENQ1
} OBESITY
s CURES
ON
dOBE@gH Z r
CURES

fore she came to, and then she found
that all she had lost by this new proc
ess was her breath and couple OF
side combs.
Mrs. Gaddings dropped in that day
and told Aunt Martha that the only
way to reduce the flesh is to take
long walk; SO Auntie picked out
long walk and took it..
After she was gone about six hours
and it was getting dark, she called
Uncle Peter up on the long distance
telephone and broke the news to him
that she had walked Is miles, and that
she had been so extravasant she had
used up all the walk that was in her,
and that she would have to stay there
in a foreign land alone, among utter
strangers, unless he sent a cab for
her.
When Aunt Martha got home that
night she found that all the flesh she
had lost was her pocketbook with ten
dollars in it. and Uncle Peter lost
about ten dollars for cab hire, making
a total of four pounds, English money.
day or two later Mrs. Carruth-
ers told Aunt Martha that the only
sure cure for obesity was 10 take cleo
trio baths, so Uncle Peter had one
rigged up which was a great shock to
his pocketbook.
AS soon as it was up Aunt Martha
went inside of the frame work aud sat
among the electric lamps with onl.
her head out in the atmosphere for
about two hours.
Then she came out smiling. and sait
she felt fine and that she must hav.
lost ten pounds.
Uncle Peter peeped inside to look
the bath over and found that she had
forgotten to turn the current on.
Next morning when Aunt Martha
went after the electric bath Uncle
Peter turned the current on himself
to make sure, and when Auntie
stepped in it she accidentally put her
foot on an ohm or something. which
tickled her so that she let blood
curdling yell out of her that could be
heard for 81 miles as the crow flies.
Then she put her other foot down
and that landed on a volt or an AM
pere or some foolish dingus which
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26

caused Aunt Martha to become short
circuited
Bunch, she was the shortest circuit
that ever happened.
For couple of minutes that room
looked like thunderstorm, with
Aunt Martha playing the thunder.
When Uncle Peter finally got the
current turned OF and all the live
wires out of her hair. Aunt Martha.
collapsed on the sofa, screaming:
Take it away! Take 1t away! Now
know what hard life the third rail
must lead!"
l think the electric treatment has
cured Aunt Martha
At any rate all the exercising par
aphernalia has been thrown out in the
back yard. and l think that now she
will be perfectly satisfied to go
through life leading double chin as
nature intended.
Yours in the current of friendship,
JOHN.
Copyright, 1908, by G. w. Dillingham; Ca.>
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26
Why He Escaped,

Two men who had not seen each
other since they parted after an ocean
voyage that was noteworthy for It's
roughness stopped to talk about the
journey.
do you remember that particularly
rough day on the Banks" one of the
men asked the other, when you were
the only man who went to lunch?"'
The good sailor allowed that he did
We'll, SIR" pursued the other. you
never knew how near you came to
death that afternoon. When Gillen
and saw you coming out on deck with
a novel in one hand and . cigar In the
other. looking disgracefully well. Gil
len said to me: ANY man who has the
nerve to haunt his ability to stand this
rolling In the face Of men a. sick as
we ought to be thrown overheard i
agreed with him. But you escaped be-
cause neither Of us was able to get
up to do it, /,
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26


when Strathgate's boat came rushing
down toward them.
It was Carrington's opportunity
Baked in his chase of his wife, he
determined to wreak his vengeance
upon the earl. AS the boat drew close
to his bows, by sudden sweep of the
helm he sent his own heavier cutter
crashing fair into it. The force with
which he struck the other boat caused
Strathgate's smaller vessel to hang on
the bows Of Carringtons boat. There
was no loss of life, for Strathgate,
scarcely worse for the disaster, fol-
lowed by Cooper and the lad, scram-
bled aboard Haight's cutter
White with passion Strathgate
rushed aft, shaking his fist at Caring
ton, who sat laughing bitterly in the
stern sheets. At Strathgate's back
were Cooper, furious over the deliber-
ate wrecking of his boat, and the boy
eager to Join in the fray.
"By heaven!" cried Strathgate,
fiercely, what did you mean by
that?"
81 should think that my meaning
was obvious even to you," says my
lord. indifferently, although he was
seething with anger to see his adver-
sary within his reach.
II don't know you, SIR" cried Coop
er, shaking his fist, but you sunk my
boat. You done it deliberately. It'll
cost you a matter Of ESQ"
"'Tis cheap at the price," answered
Darlington. Don't worry, my man.
Just pipe down." he continued, as
Cooper opened his mouth to expostu.
late. "Tm Lord Darlington. You shall
be paid for your boat and something
for your trouble"
Payment is not enough to com.
pensate me, Carrington," cried strath-
gate. furiously.
NO" returned Darlington, there's
nothing that might offer you that
would pay you for what you've done,
you dastard!"
What do you mean?"
You know very we'll what l mean,
although I confess 1 have done some
wrong to your powers Of fascination" I"
returned Darlington.
And what, pray, may be the ex.
PLANTATION of that statement?" queried
strathgate.
II thought that you had run away
with my wife: thought so yesterday
morning. that IL; but now 1 see that
she ded from you a. we'll a. from
me-"
Its lie!" cried strathgate.
Both men were now 20 worked up
and 20 blinded with passion that they
did not care for the opsn-mouthsd.
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26

"One Of the Rubber Strings Broke"
pened to be in the way when the oar
came down.
When loving hands finally pulled
Aunt Martha out of the interior Of her
rockingham. she found that, with the
help of the rowing machine. she had
lost nearly two pounds. mostly of the
end of her elbow.
The next day Mrs. Cooper, who
weighs about 246, told Aunt Martha
that she wasn't using the best kind
of physical torture, so Uncle Peter
was once more chased OF to the store.
where he bought one Of those rubber
contrivances you fasten ON the wall
and then try to pull it of again with
the handles.
Bright and early the next morning
Aunt Martha grabbed the handles.
and was getting away from her obes-
ity at the rate Of an ounce an hour.
when suddenly one Of the rubber
strings broke and something kicked
Aunt Martha just where good singer
gets her coloratura.
When Aunt Martha fell wounded on
the field of battle every picture on
the walls fell with her, and there
was such a crash that the cook thought
the end of the world was coming. SO
she ran screaming in the direction of
Patterson. N. J.
They had to pour about bucket
Of water over Aunt Martha's map be-
The Glenwood post., 1908-09-26
Woman,a WlIsa.

YES" confided Mrs. A.. II IND Il
very profitable to give my husband .
dressing down occasionally. gave
him one to-day"
But how il 1t profitable," Qperisd
Mrs. q.
why, he generally gives me .
dressing up"
Dressing up?"
"Yes: to get mo in good humor
again he promises me . new coat .
new set Of fufs and Q new hat
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19

and be led. Perhaps this sounds foolish to you,
but you asked me a question, and l have given
you answer
If Farmdae knew little of this man, there was
less of Miss Denny that it did not know. Its
knowledge of him could be briefly summed up
That he had ridden into it night on the down
stagecoach, and asked at the post-ofice to be
shown quiet place where board could be had for
a week so; that the next morning found him
at the cozy table of Miss Denny beside the clerk
of the village store, fanked right and left by the
manager of the tannery and the schoolmaster, and
opposite the mistress of the house, who sat EN-
trenched behind the daintest of her household
gods; that he had slept, lounged, and eaten with
the air of one who, at thirty-eight had thrown off
some great mental or business strain that had
already grown streaks of gray in his hair; that
he spent money freely need be in the
row ways and close economies of this small Ohio
town; that his chief delight and one known vice
was to fire goodhumored TRADES at the urchins of
the neighborhood, in words far beyond their COM
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19

Janet had indeed answered his question with
honesty, but she too much of the woman to
confess that when the argument began to take
shape between them some weeks ago, her position
had been assumed for that arguments sake But
by dnt of much repetition, and the searching of
all the hooks and corners of her heart for pleas
in support of her theory, she had unconsciously
become her own first and most steadfast
vert, and burned with all the zeal of the martyrs
Of old
Had she known-had she dreamed for a moment
of the love that had sprung up in the heart of
the stranger who had halted for rest at her gate,
and that he was only hiding it until such time as
confession should be the most certain to win sue
cess, not all the eloquence and all the challenges
that his lips could utter would have led her to
promulgate or defend the faith to which she had
given her discipleship.
She knew it all week later. For the first time
in his life, he called her by the name her mother
had given her. And as she looked up with flush,
in which there no touch of anger, he took her
hand and, turning toward the western sky, said
gently: Janet, there may be glory and there
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19
By J. H. Kennedy.

81 believe that l know it. But martyrdom my
child, is nothing beside right to knowledge that
goes unsatisfed. You would meet a lion unmoved
but let this mysterious and undescribed lover re-
fuse to tell you of himself, his profession his
mother his past and his income, and you would
lay bar before him beyond which he could,not
advance. You would say to him: You will not
trust me, and dare not trust you. The marriage
license would never be put to use."
"You do not understand me, sir" she said
simply. 81 could not give the love until | had
given the trust-such trust as child gives to its
father in the dark | could then close my eyes
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19

prehension; that he had given to no man and to
no woman one hint as to his past or his home
and that the bravest of them had not cared to
question MIN.
Laid beside these mysteries, the life of Miss
Denny was an open book that even the children
could read. It's lesson was pure and simple. Even
that Missionary of Personal Intelligence, who had
taken upon herself the responsibility of being
mother to the shock-headed boy, could find no
broken letter or distorted chapter in it that venom
would lie upon. "Know Janet Denny?' she would
have answered you, "Well, I should say so. She
thirty-one last December, tenth | believe
perhaps the ninth-it was Tuesday, anyway.
Her father gave up and died ten years ago-d1dnt
amount to much, with his readin' in the haymow,
and sermonizn at the woodpile. Her mother
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19

Q
goin' on five years.
Smart gal. Takes
boarders, and her
folks didn't even
leave her the house
she lives in. She
taught school once,
in the seminary at
Mayield, but gave it
up to nurse her
mother. Reads po-
etry-not that | can
see the good of it, but
'spect she does, or
she wouldn't do it.
She always says
what she means,
does her own work
like the rest of us,
and makes her own
bonnets. Heard she
had the chance tO
marry a jabbering
Dutchman, one of
them professors over
at Mayfield, but don't
believe it. 'Twould
take a drawer man
than a little Dutch
man with a long
name to make love
to her. She had a
beau onct, when she
was seventeen or
eighteen, but he died
fore anything was
said, and Janet kept
kinder quiet for a
few years. No,
she'll live and die an
old maid. I've al
ways said that. But
see here! What did
that dodgin' fellow
in the speckled suit
mean by tellin' my
Bill that he come
from the Land of
Nod? My man says
there amt no such
place in these dig
gings; and my old
man has travelled"
Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-01-19

0HE shock-headed boy threw another
stone at the butchers dog and
=" then falling back on his base of
u supplies by the old we'll curb
found himself close upon the
man in the hammock, under
8, Miss Dennys apple-tree.
See here said the man, as
the urchin came to strategic halt, 81
wonder If your mother would sell you
to me, and would she haggle over the
price. How does it strike your
THAT depends. Wot would you do
with me?"
Really, l don't know. You admit
you are fat, and | might want to ship
you to the Cannibal Island as a spec
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1908-05-09
A MATTER FOR THE PEOPLE
OF SPOTSYLvANIA
To CONSInER
TO CONSIDER

Under the provisions OF the Gen.
eral Road Law, which becomes OPP
erative In Spotsylvania county some
time early in July next, by reason Of
the repeal OF the present road law,
under which the roads are being
worked the supervisors will be called
upon to put into effect new and, to
our mind, a much better system OF
road working. Under the General
Law the board can also, II they see
q {, increase the road tax TO as high
as 40 cents on the dollar, the present
county road tax being 30 cents, with
no district tax
As the total tax rate in Spotsyl-
vania county is exceedingly low. be
ing one dollar for all purposes, and
this including the State tax, it seems
that, II the people really want bet
ter roads, the board can well afford
to increase the county road tax, or
else levy in addition to the county
tax district tax in those districts
which desire to get out OF the mud
Probably more important even than
the tax question is that OF electing
a competent superintendent OF roads
This officer, il the right kind OF man
is chosen, and paid a respectable sal
airy for his services. will be OF inesti-
mable value to the county, and
should be able, by careful attention
to his duties, to devise better sys-
tenn OF road improvement than has
heretofore been obtained in the
county.
There can be no doubt that the
people were right when they instruct
ed their representatives in the legis-
lature to place the county under the
General Law; but even this viii not
avail unless the supervisors do their
part. The people should begin to
look into this matter, and to cast
around for the right kind OF a man
to take charge of the situation.
When they have found him, they
should let the supervisors know their
wishes, and it's members, being elect
ed by the people, should do their viii.
This is the most important matter
confronting the people of Spotsyl
vania- They can not afford to neg.
lect It
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1908-05-09

Alleged Oefaleation Discovered BY
Bank Examiner. Who Said Cashiers
Checks Were Used TO Hide the
Shortage.
Pittsburg. May S.-William Mont
gomery. cashier Of the Allegheny Ma
tional bank for over twenty years. was
arrested on a charge OF embezzling
$i29. 600 of the banks funds. He was
arraigned before United States Com
missioner W. r. Lindsay and held for
the federal grand jury under bond Of
$50. 600. which was furnished by
George +. Tener. a iinaucier and bust
ness man.
The financial standing of the bank
is in no wise affected by the defalCa-
ton. as it is in a position TO bear the
loss without embarrassment. The bank
has a capital stock Of 100000. sur
plus. 100000; undivided profits. sie9.-
46l bank building. cash on hand etc.
S6S6.972: due from other banks. slo6.-
IA; deposits. $2.444.S63.
The alleged defalcation was discov-
cred and the complaint filed by Ma
tional Bank Examiner William l.
Folds. who. having had his suspicious
aroused. in company with several
other experts. entered the bank before
banking hours and took possession OF
the books. papers and cash.
Soon after the close of banking
hours the warrant was issued and the
arrest followed.
According 10 Examiner Folds. the
populations have been going on for
several years and were covered up on
the occasion OF each visit OF the eN-
amincrs by means of cashiers check.
The bank maintained a cashiers fund.
often amounting to as much as 500
900. it is said. and upon the appear.
ance OF the examiner. IL is alleged the
cashier would send a messenger 10
some other bank with his check for an
amount necessary 70 cover the short.
age After the completion OF the ex
animation the check would be re
deemed.
The Allegheny National is one OF the
older and generally regarded as one OF
the stronger Institutions of the city Il
has been more or less associated with
the politics OF Western Pennsylvania
and it's directors room was the scene
OF many important political confer
enccs. particularly curing the life OF
the late Senator Quay. who frequently
met his friends and iieutcnants in this
room. Mr.. Montgomery has always
been prominent in politics. and was a
particularly close friend OF the late
Senator Quay.
Examiner Folds expressed the be
lief. after making the charges that
Mr. Montgomery had used the funds
OF the bank 10 assist friends who were
in tight places financially through
poor investments or other causes
Those who know the cashier best feel
positive that he did not personally
profit by his populations.
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1908-05-09
IL Nearo victIr of consumntion.

Richmond. Va. May S.-Dr. Charles
B. Grandy spoke on The Negro Con
sumptive" before the public health
section Of the national conference o.
charities and corrections, Nearly three
times as many deaths from tubercu.o
sis occur among negroes as among the
whites Of the United States. he said
II indicated that there is a physical
predisposition. OF lack of resistance. e.
tuberculosis ia the negro and that on
account OF mental defect the blacs
man is unable TO meet conditions Of
American city life which now faces
him
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1908-05-09
Can't Beach shlnwr.eked Men.

New York. MAY S-Buneted by seas
which a bowling southeastern sent
surging over the shadows OF short
Beach until she was all broken up
amidships. the four-masted ship Peter
Rickmers. with loo men on board. lies
in a position OF extreme peril Only
her jigger remained. and on board are
her crew Of forty odd men and the
sixty wreckers put aboard TO jettison
the cargo OF case oil. once lines werc
iung across the boat. but the wina
and seas swept them away. All day
life savers awaited a calming OF the
storm which would enable them Co
send their surf boats 10 the distressed
vessel The rough seas. however. con
tinued. and the wreck has not been
reached
The free lance. (Fredericksburg, Va.) 1885-1926, 1908-05-09
m TIE NAVE OLE TIE COMMON.

N THE NAME OF THE COMMON
L WEALTH OF VIRGINIA: In tne
Clerks Office OF the Circuit Court of
the county of Spotsylvania. on the 9Th
day Of May. 1908. Hattie Y. Carter
plaintiff. vs. Nelson V Carter and Festu-
+. Carter, defendants
Inc OUI-rt "a ,ui- suit Is TO obtain a di-
vOrce from Nelson Y. Carter "A mensa OIL
The grounds OF wiliiul abandonment ano
iesertion. and at the expiration 90 thr, e
years TO obtain a divorceirom said pas )
a vinculO on the same grounds Alimony
Il asked for by the plaintiff and the
annuliment OF a certain deed from Nelson
Y. Carter 70 Festus f. Carter. conveying
certain personal property, of record in
the Clerks Office OF said county in Deed
Book A. Y, p. 80. alleged 10 have been
made in deiraud OF the plaintiff and
without consideration. and therefore
void; and TO set up two deeds showing
the title OF Nelson '. Carter 10 fifty acres
OF land, IN Spotsy county. under "A
deed from Festus +. Carter. and also to
set a deed 10 the said Nelson V Carter
FOR one half interest in pa acres In said
county. standing on the land book in the
name Of J. e. Bolander's estate.
And an affidavit having been made and
fled that diligence has been used on be-
half OF the plaintiff To ascertain the
whereabouts Of the said Nelson Y. Carter
without effect, Il Is ordered that he do
appear here within fifteen days after due
public alton hereof. and do what may be
necessary TO protect his interest In this
suit. And II Is further ordered that a
copy thereof be published once a week
for four weeks in The Free Lance, and
that a copy be posted at the front door
of the courthouse of this county on OF
before the next succeeding rule day after
the entry OF this suit
4 COpy-Teste:
T. A. HARRIS, Clerk.
T. Stokeley Coleman and Granville Il
SUiff n N Ina "a 1 "A