The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-04-18
DRIFTWOOD
nY PHIL V. ARMsTRoNG.


 Let us hope 1t won't be too cool for the eternal Easter suit tomorrow. We noticed blue-eyed blondes, brown eyed brunettes and Titjdn-haired Tes- sies among the sweet Alabama school marms yesterday.
 Kentucky appears to be very much juries viii do with the night riders. We don't imagine they will strain themselves doing anything. Justice has a queer way of looping the loop Seems like women ought to be chosen for bank t'ellers."
 Everybody isn't on the square who moves in the best circles.
 One of fhe Paris papers makes the sample f of inSd noSleman. s Strikes Strike us those hose foreign noblemen are mostly all poor" samples the way they go after Ameri- can dollars.
 Drift Armgtrong's continuous allusions to "Blue-eyed Blondes and Red Straw berries" reminds us that they're both as false as the Southern. berry box. - Buffalo Evening News.
 Miss April has tears in her eyes."'- Drift Armstrong in Montgomery Ad-
 
 green apples in her bread basket. = Talladega Mountain Home.
 John Wells in The Buffalo News says there will be no peaches this year: |" We feel sorry, John, that you live in Benighted Buffalo where such a ca- lamity hath befallen you. and hasten gomery where there will be an abund- ance of big. red-cheeked peaches with rich Jersey cream. and pretty blue eyed blondes to sit beside you and help you eat 'em.
 Physicians say that a moderate amount of rope-jumping Is benehcial to health. but some politicians seem to interpret it to mean jumping on first one side then the other of the fence.
 Montgomery, Ala. How would this look In "DriftwoodT Tt doesn't necessarily follow that a man is a cook because he needs (kneadsl the dough. shying this at the public, you are well come to 1t, and the perpetrator. will re- 'Fiower that was born to blush unseen And waste its sweetness on the desert Yours for fun. B. H. eve wouldn't deprive you of the eAoty, oA PSA pN@Ao oeAhS %"~t avs - ".NS dom.)
 Washington wants cheaper gas" says a headline Whats the matter? Want the salaries of Congressman re. duced?
 It was no unusual sight to see an overcoat and a straw hat worn by the same man on the street yesterday. If there are many more police shake ups in Philadelphia the old village will wake up yet
 A foundry man up East says that love-letters made him so sick he wouldn't marry. And yet wc should 1 imagine that fellow had an "iron" con- stitution.
 The Houston Post says: "A Hous- | ton girl declines to wear one of the trimmed a hobby little hat with mare- rials costing s2. But flor the benefit | of outsiders. we will say she Is to be married during the last week in April 1 George Bailey with cool, realm delip- eration and without any hope for the 1 future says Why not live In state | where you can founder on strawbffry shortcake for dime? | A girl in St. Joseph. Mo, says she cures lonesomeness by finding in the telephone book a man whose name | ter-calIs him up, and after "1ollying" him half an hour feels all right. Fly cry man. she says, is willing to talk: But if she were Dlue-eyeq plohoe 9L Montgomery she wouldn't have to do that.
 A horse owned by Henry Anbele of Gloucester City. N. J., escaped from swan over a creek The men were un. able to follow, and after stay of twenty minutes the animal swam back and consented to be bridled'-News Sure now, this wasn't the Democratic donkey?
 . Three cheers for the big red-headed Alabama strawberry soused in rich Jer- sey cream.
 A red.head, snub-nosed Texas widow has announced that her next M husband ISL na It raw. Now don't everybody propose to that dear girl at once'
 Montgomery young man went into 9tG a music store yesterday and asked TOT A break down" |" The clerk, evidently from a sense of humor. handed him the latest automobile two-step.
 Sunday School Teacher-Now. Ethel don't you say your prayers! | Ethel-Nom-dunno how. S. S. T.-Why. I am surprised. Your little brother does. doesn't her
 Ethel-Sometimes.
 s, $, T.-What did he say when hs knelt down last night? Ethel-He said: Sister, if you don quit ticklin' my feet I'll pull all you' blamed hair out"
 The Little Optlmlst.
 De weather's gettin' cooler
 An de clouds hangin' low.
 Makes a darkey skeery
 When he hear de cool wind bloW' De garden done start growth
 An de fruit most hear you see But de blue-bird des a singin'
 In de china-berry tree.
 II. Des a singin'. des singln
 O de watermelon time,
 When Q darkey gifts Twin
 Elf he habn't got dime.
 An aint a-kerein' nohow
 Elf a few cold days we sec
 Fo' de blue-bird des a sipgin
 In de chinaberry tree.
 DENIAL OF THIRD TERM.