The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1908-01-25

| S
| "He's engaged to a widow" How
did he meet herr" HE did not meet
her. She overlook him."-Philadelphia
Inquirer.
when bird can sing and won't"
YES" 1T isn't half the trouble as
a bird that can't sing and will."-Bal-
timore American.
Zone woman" remarked the mere
man, "is just as good as another-if
not better" "And one man." rejoined
the fair widow, "is just as bad as an
other-if not worse. Chicago News.
Where have you been, Samf" use
been up to ma two ears in work, sah."
up to your two ears in work?" Yes,
sah." "What doing, SAM" "Eatin'
la watahmellion, sah!'@Yonkers States
man.
Tommy-Ma, baby Is naughty. He
cried because l wouldn't give him any
Of my cake. Mammals his own cake
finished2 Tommy-Yes, ma; and he
cried while 1 was eating that, tool
Punch.
Don't give you all the money you
NEEDY? her husband complained. yes"
she replied, "but you told me before
we were married that you would give
me all wanted"-Chicago Record
Herald,
"You seem to find that book very in
teresting," said Mrs. Henpeck. yes"
replied Henry, "it's delightful. I've
glanced at the ending, and the hero and
heroine don't get married after all."-
Washington Herald.
: Miss Kreech-Some authorities be-
, lieve that the practice Of singing Will
Z keep a person from getting consump-
, ton. Mr. Knox.-Yes, but most au-
thorities believe in "the greatest good
to the greatest number. Philadelphia
Press.
Rural Citizen Ito son engaged In
7 strange exercises -JabeZ, what In tar
4 nation be yer tryin' t do? His Son
:, It's that thar correspondence school,
dad. / got letter from the sophie
mores yestiddy tellin' me to haze
) m'self.-Puck,
d "Who Is this fellow Rush you spoke
s OFF, "Oh, he's well-known chauf'
feur" "a well-known chauffeur
"That's what 1 said" "Why, l never
heard of him." swell, you would II
y YOU were a court clerk like l am p
Yonkers' Statesman.
q "Gracious! my DEAR" said the hrs
society belle, II do hope you're not III
you look SO much older tonight" I'm
quite we'll, thank you, DEAR" replied thu
other, "and you-how wonderfully I'm
proved you are! You look positivel!
young."-Phlladelph Press.
Casual Caller Ito one next him)-
was introduced to that squint-eyed, red
e. haired woman over there as Mrs. Some
body or other. Don't you think tn
I man was an idiot that married her
Next One (meekly)-I can't just say
I'm the man,-Baltimore American.
| "You enjoy going to the theater?
| EYES," answered Mr.. Meekton. "Bu
/ you don't care much for musica
N plays?" "No. What enjoy Is to tax
= Henrietta where there Is whole lo
, of conversation going on In which sh
can't say word."-New York Tribune
a "Tomkins has got more nerve tina
any man I ever met" what now
ae ale came over to my place yesterda
IT. 1T: to borrow my gun, saying that he wan
s 81 ed to kill a dog that kept him awah
at nights" "Well, what Of it?" ut We
s us my dog he Observation-Disclosures Sent
ed nel.
Does your honor wish to charge IL
juryT" asked the legal light, when a
Eou the evidence was In. mo, I que
. not replied the judge. II new
charge 'em anything. These fellow
don't know much. any way, an let e
have all they can make."-Harper
Weekly.
"Do you think" asked the swe
girls mother, "that Mr.. wilkins is &
riousf" "seriousf Ma, he's wor
than that. He stayed here till near
12 o'clock last night, and any one wi
| had studied his face might has thong
he was sitting up with corpse. "-Ci
| cago Record Herald
Father-I wish you'd invite tn
young man of yours up here to-morrc
i night. Daughter (surprised at the
quest why, father, l thought y
said YOU had no use for hint Father
So did, last summer. But to-morrt
. I'm going to put up the stove.-Detr'
Free Press. s.
In "what does your father do to ca
~ his livingp" asked New York prin
i. pal of pupil who was being admitt'
: "Please. ma'am, he doesn't live WI
us: mamma supports me-" "well thu
7sAfhow does your mother earn her living
f3she gets paid for staying away FRI
Z Il papa" replied the child. artlessly
taarperS. Weekly.