davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
The Only One,

Henry VIII. of England. being at one
time at variance with Francis l. Of
France, decided to send an ambassa-
dor and to charge him with very
fierce and menacing message to this
prince. He chose for this Office an
English bishop in whom he had great
confidence and whom he believed
would be the most proper person to
carry out his design. His prelate, be-
ing Informed of the nature of his mis-
sion and fearing for his life should he
treat with Francis in the naughty
manner his master desired, represented
to the king the danger to which he
was exposing him and begged not to be
sent on this mission.
"Oh, never fear" said Henry. IF
the king of France should kill you,
will have the head of every French
man | find in my kingdom
II believe you, sire" replied the bish-
op, but permit me to assure you that
of all the heads you will cut off there
is not one of them that will fit on my
body as well as my own
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
A Fatal Austrian FLAG.

Once there was an epidemic of plague
at Odessa, in Russia, which lasted
more than Il year. 1t had n most re-
markable origin, being due to a fatal
flag. An Austrian vessel arrived at
Odessa, bringing one Of the crew who
had died during the voyage. The sail
or was duly inferred in the Catholic
cemetery at the port, and at the fu-
neral the Austrian flag was carried by
two seamen. On their way back to
the vessel the men entered Il great
number of saloons and laid down the
flag while drinking. \ very short
time afterward the sailors who had
carried the nag died, and before long
it was found that people were ill in
all the houses where the men had call
ed with the fatal flag. Soon the plague
spread throughout Odessa, filling all
with terror and claiming a frightful
toll. There is no doubt that the flag
contained the plague bacilli in the
folds and SO spread the disease
Baltimore Sun.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Sensible Dod.

Talking about the intelligence Of an
fmals," said young Kanebiter, "why, I
have dog up ut the farm that's sim
ply wonderful"
How 500" said Pitken.
"Why, YOU see, ] was out shooting
one day when | found Il large, hand
some dog lying on the ground moaning
with pain. Some ruffian had shot it
In the leg. l carried it home bandaged
the wound and finally cured the poor
beast. Some months after that | was
compelled to travel lonely road after
dark when suddenly Ponto. who ac-
companied me, growled warningly.
The next moment highwayman step
ped out of the bushes and put a pistol
to my head"
"Ah," cried the listener II see!
Thereupon the grateful dog seized the
robber by the throat"
"Not at all. The man robbed me
easily enough-took watch, purse, ev-
erything."
But Ponto?'
Ran off as fast as his legs would
carry him. Thats'the point-don't you
see? Animal instinct-didn't want to
get shot again" - Illustrated London
News.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
The Hundred Best Books.

THE fact is that there is no posi-
blllty of naming the hundred best
books. The naming of them for any
large general audience is quite impos-
sible. All that is possible in such a
connection is to state emphatically
that there are very few books that are
equally suitable to every kind of in
tellect," says Clement Shorter In his
book of Immortal Memories ITEM
permanent as we'll as intellectual en-
dOwment makes for so much in read
ing. Take, for example, the Imitation
Of Christ George Eliot, although not
q Christian, found it soul satisfying.
Thackeray, as think more robust in
tellect, found it well nigh as mischiev-
GUS as did Eugene Sue. There are
great books that can be read only by
the few, but surely the very greatest
appeal alike to the man Of rich intel
lectual endowment and to the man to
whom all processes of reasoning are
ncomprehensible."
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
The Ferret and the Rat,

A correspondent of Il London paper,
commenting on the crusade against
rats in Great Britain, says: "The real
remedy against rats is the ferret, not
the unhealthy ferret kept by the half
starved rat catcher of the agricultural
village, but the strong, healthy ferret
bred on the ground floor of a we'll ven
tilated, commodiouS dog kennel and
there kept on skimmilk. table refuse
and small birds. Bedded with clean
wheat straw, the ferret is one of the
sweetest of animals, and the expert
goes into the kennels and cheers them
as though In Il kennel of hounds, and
they crawl about him harmlcssly. The
young bucks will run miles across the
country with the expert, just like lit
tie terriers. With this healthy life
they grow too big for hunting rats In
barns or other buildings, but they can
settle any rat in wheat stack If put
In before the rat has made n labyrinth
inside the stack. The doe ferrets will
rout the buildings, and they alone
should be the chief instrument in the
crusade. The rat IS too cunning for
guns, traps and other Devices
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
An Irish Tale.

One day an Irishman, having put his
hat upon a gate post by which he lay
down to sleep, sprang up at midnight
and, mistaking the object for an en-
emy, dealt it a desperate cut with his
scythe. Perceiving his mistake, the
man gave thanks to heaven that he
had taken it off before lying down.
For" said he, had my head been in
that hat, it's ten to one / had laid it
open with my scythe, and it's q dead
man l would have been seein' mesilf at
this minute!'-London Captain.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Same. but More of IL.

Sitting in a Broadway restaurant the
other evening were two young women
who had not met for four years. One
of them had grown stout and the other
had admitted that she wouldn't have
recognized her old friend under ordi-
nary circumstances. They sat silently
looking at each other for a moment,
when the heavyweight inquired:
what are you thinking about?"
81 was just trying to see whether
your expression is the same as it used
to be" said her friend.
"Just the same" the girl with the
avoirdupois declared. "Only more of
it."-New York Globe.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
NJ Not Far to Go.

The reporter hurried up to the scene
of the accident. a workman engaged
on some scaffolding had missed his
footing and had fallen many feet into
the street below. Then the reporter
went off to interview the unfortunate
man, who luckily had escaped with
very severe shaking and few nasty
bruises, and asked sympathetically:
did YOU have vertigo, my MANI"
"Oh, no, sir; only about thirty-fve
feet. Quite far enough for me, though"
--PearSon'S.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
A WILLING Informer,

- "hi'H9 iHIoTEHcFs
What is the numberT' repeated CEN
trail.
Violet Park, eight-seven-seven."
Violet Park, eight t-double-seven?
II reckon So"
And what number do you wantT"
"Elmdale, two-naught-fo
What is your nameY'
my name is John Henry Miggles. I
live at Go Blicken street Violet Park.
My house phone is Violet Park, eight
seven-seven or eight-double-seven, as
you choose. | am married. have no
children. We keep dog and a cat and
perpetual palm and Boston fern,
and"-
"All that is unnecessary, sir We
merely
And last summer we didn't have a
bit of luck with our roses. | tried to
have little garden, too, but the neigh
bors' chickens got away with that The
house is green, with red gables. There
is cement walk from the street
am forty years old. My wife is young
er and looks it, We have piano. keep
n cook and an upstairs girl Had the
front bedroom papered last week, and
l want
Did you want Elmdale two-naught-
four-sevenP
''Yes!' gasped Mr. Miggles.
'Well, the line is busy now. Shall |
call youY'
But Mr.. Miggles wrote letter-New
Orleans Picayune.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
The Cure.

"You look glum," said the husband of
one clever woman to the man who had
married her companion.
80 would you if your wife studied
geology and filed the house with
stones until there wasn't place left
for you to sit"
Don't worry about that" was the
cheerful reply. "Turn your wife's
thoughts to astronomy. That will suit
her just as well, and she can't collect
specimens. ."-Sketchy Bits.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Golf,

Golf as Il recreation appeals to prac.
tically all ages. Impetuous youth,
staid middle age and the man in the
evening walk of life alike feel its fas-
cination and enjoy its manifold pleas
ures. Golf entails walking, the best
of exercises for the average man. 1t
trains the eye and the arm, and, while
1t tries, it ought also to train the tenn
per.-Liverpool Courier.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Strictly Business.

SSH" began stranger as he walk
ed directly up to a business man, II
am strictly on business"
$50 am l."
Good! | believe every man should
furnish money for his own tombstone"
$50 do l."
Good again! / want to raise $50
to pay for stone over my grave.
What assistance will you render the
enterprise? / want business an
swer.'
"You shall have it, sir. Unless you
Immediately take your departure I will
aid the enterprise by furnishing the
corpse"
The stranger hurried off.-Cleveland
Plain Dealer
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
An Eve Experiment

The two eyes really see two objects.
If the two forefngers be held, one at
the distance of one foot, the other two
feet in front of the eyes, and the for
mer be looked at, two phantoms of the
latter will be observed one on each
side. If the latter figure be regarded,
two phantoms of the nearest finger
will be observed mounting guard, one
on either side.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Answered..

Two ministerial candidates named
Adam and Low preached in Scottish
church. Mr.. Low preached in the
morning and took for his text, adam.
where art thou?"
He made most excellent discourse,
and the congregation was much edi-
fed. In the evening Mr.. Adam preach
ed and took for his text, 10, here l
amw
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
A Warm Time COMING.

"I'm dom me best with the fire, sir"
said the janitor at the door of Gailey's
office one cold morning, but I'm
afraid l can't make it very warm for
you. You see, SIR
"Never mind" feverishly replied Cal
ley. who had been out all night. My
wife viii be here shortly, 1 expect."-
Philadelphia Ledger.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
An Effective Scarecrow.

\ scarecrow used by farmer in the
north of England not only scared every
crow that saw 1t, but one crow was so
frightened that he brought back the
corn he had carried to his nest three
days before.-London Tit-Bits.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
PUTTING Il Gently

Mr.. Henpeck-I hear that young
Jones and his wife are not getting
along very we'll Mrs. Henpeck (au-
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. should never have
married when he did. He was too
young to realize the step he was tax
ing Mr.. Henpeck-Yes, l know, but l
like the boy. We have many things in
cOmmon-Puck.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19

Peggy-Was that pliccman ever lit
tie baby. mother? MGthel-Why. yes,
dear Peggy (thoughtfnlly)- don't
believe I've ever seen baby p'lice-
man!-Punch.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
BEAUTIFY YOUR HOME

BEAUTIFY YOUR HOME
By furnishing it in our establish
lnent where you have complete
assortment Of new and artisti-
cally designed Household Furni-
ture to select from. We handle
some elegant and strongly built
furniture for every room in the
house and will be happy to show
you through our stock whether
you are contemplating an imme-
diate purchase or merely recon
noitering" for furniture bargains
later on.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
His Economy.

Father-It's only fair to tell you that
I'm pleased with your economy this
term. Your requests for money were
too frequent last term. Son-Yes, ia
ther, l thought so, too, SO this term
I've had everything on tick.-London
Tit-Bits.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
No Other Course Open.

Now" said the physician, you will
have to eat plain food and not stay out
late at night"
Yes, replied the patient; that is
what ] have been thinking ever since
you sent in your bill. Catholic News.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Lucky.

Smith-Just missed running down an
old lady with my auto. Jones-Bah
Jove. you're Il lucky dog! Smith
Sure. l just had it painted last week
Chicago News.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Satire.

Satire is a sort of glass wherein be-
holders do generally discover every
body's face but their own, which is the
chief reason for that kind reception it
meets with in the world.-Swift
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19

And now," said the talkative man
at the concert, suppose at time like
this you were all alone in the world
What would you do with Nervous
Man-Thank the Lord.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19

If you want Your patent leather
shoes to last twice as long, rub Them
frequently with sweet oil or vaseline.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Little Food,

notwithstanding is preying on my
mind. Professor W.T. must be very
hungry-Yale Record.
Cameron County press. [volume] (Emporium, Cameron County, Pa.) 1866-1922, 1908-03-19
Business Cards.

j. G. JOHNSON. J.P MCNARNEy
+. A. JOHNSON.
JOHNSON & McNARNEY,
S-AT-LAW
EMPORIUM, Pa.
Will give prompt attention to all business en-
trusted to them. I6-Iy
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-12-25

rse Of this monstrous charge. There WIN
be a rising of the whole nation II You do
not instantly release me. For your own
sake, sir, l warn you to be prompt"
This man is pretending to be mad
said the magistrate.
II fear there is more reality than pre-
tense about the business" said the doctor.
He took Ransome to the window, and
looked at his eye- In the strong white
light Of noon. Then he went over to the
magistrate, and they whispered together
for some minutes, while the prisoner SAT
staring at the door and muttcring to him
self.
After that there came a long dark in
terval in George Ransome's life-a wax
ing dream of intolerable length, but not
unalloyed misery for the Authorizations
which made his madness buoyed him up
and sustained him during some part OF
that dark period. He talked with princes
and statesmen he was not alone in the
~madhousc cha mbcr, or in the madhouse
garden, or in that great iron cage where
even the most desperate maniacs were
allowed to disport themselves in the air
and the sunlight as in a gymnasium. he
was surrounded by invisible friends and
hatterers, by public ~functionaries who
quailed before his glance and were eager
to obey his commands.
ITO be c%ontinued.)
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-12-25

Vessel In from Long Voyage Twice
Saved by Bark's Pct.
After having been twice saved from
destruction by 4 large Newfoundland
dog Snug on her voyage to Boston from
| Buenos Ayres, the Norwegian bark
Queen sailed into the harbor Tuesday,
following 4 tempestuous and nerve
rackinE passage, says the Boston Post.
Snug Ia hailed as q hero by the crew
Of the ship. He by his sagacity twice
| came to their rescue, once when the
| vessel was threatened by a hurricane
on Hatteras and agnin on last Sunday,
when she nearly went ashore on the
Cape Cod sands.
Capt. J. Aall Taraldsen and his YES
sci hail from Grimstad, Norway. She
carries 4 crew Of twelve men, together
with Snug. two turkeys, four pigeons
and two large black pigs.
Snug Ia a vcritable product Of the
sea lived aboard a derelict when 1t had
been abandoned by the ships crew and
in 4 hurricane four years ago swan
from the washed decks of the sinking
ship aboard the Queen.
The latest stunts Of the dog are be-
ing told and retold by the grateful
crew. The Queen hailed from Rio de
Janeiro on Nov. % and called at Barba-
dos, leaving there Dec. % In ballast
trim for Boston.
A hurricane Of unusual severity
sprung up a week ago Tuesday, and at
times the vessel was threatened with
destruction. Her skipper feared that
she would turn turtle, so boisterOus
was the weather.
Throughout the gale Snug had kept
close to the shippers heels and whe
the waves began to wash over the deck
Snug was dashed to a thwart. When Il
big wave caught the skipper and made
him lose his grip on the wheel he had
been almost washed overheard when
Snug grabbed his clothes in his teeth
and kept him from going over thes side.
The Queen came around Cape Cod
during the violent southeasterly gale of
Sunday. Capt. Taraldsen wore ship
and stood off shore. and after round
ing the pitch Of the cape came up the
bay and subsequently was picked up Dy.
the tug Pallas and was towed to the
ballast wharf in South Boston.
During the gale Capt. Taraldsen be-
lieved that his vessel was doomed. Snug
followed at his heels and whined and
In 4 last effort to trim the
sails and wear the vessel around the
crew was sent to haul on the halyards.
They bent their backs to the strain.
but without gaining an inch.
Then Snug seized the rope between
his teeth and lent his weight to that
Of the crew. His strength was equal
to that Of a man. It was just enough
The crew got the halyard started
and hauled the sail 80 hat the ship
gradually wore around and, within
sound of the boom Of the breakers on
the shore, stood OF to sea.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-12-25
MEN IN THE BREAD LINE.
Powderly Says Most Of Them Arc
Buns and S~calawags.

says NOSt u AAoA
Buns and Scalawags.
After Disgusting himself and standing
in the New York City bread line 1or
hours. during which time he interview
ed many others in line. Terence V. POW
derly, government labor agent and tor-
mer president of the knights OF La
Dor, has made up his min that most
of the men who form the nightly line III
Broadway would not work il they hao
a chance.
According to advices from Washing
ron. Mr.. Powderly, who is Il careful stu
dent of sociology, and whose chief busl-
ness it is to lind work for Immigrants
and to keep them out of the cities, mas
made several visits to the bread line.
In "hobo" makeup he has studied at
close range the men who go nightly for
bread. His conclusions tend to destroy
a great deal Of the sympathy that has
been expressed for the men in the fam
Gus bread line.
"Some Of them are all right said
Mr.. Powderly, land more of them
would not work if they had the chance.
The majority told me sad tales about
their lives, tales that I knew to be
false. Some of them pretended to have
been bankers, brokers, or engaged in
other lines Of business. Their very
speech betrayed them. Most of them
are buns and ~scalawags."
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-12-25

1672-A monthly post was established
between New York and Boston.
1775-British under Lord Dunmorc de
featcd by the Americans at Norfolk,
w. Va.
1777-Washington's army went into win
ter quarters Mt Valley Forge.
17S7-Pennsylvania (thc second State)
ratified the federal constitution.
17S9-The first circulating library was
established in Salem, Mass.
lSO4-Ncw York Historical Society in
stituted. .... Spain declared war
against Great Britain. ..Twoscore
of houses on Wall street, New York,
destroyed by fire.
1SO7-An unusually large and brilliant
meteor was seen in Connecticut.
1S11-Americans under Gen. Harrison
left the battle-ground at Tippecanoc
on their return to the United States,
1S1G-Indiana admitted into the Union
as the nineteenth State.
1S3O-National Republican party, at Bal
timore, nominated Henry Clay for
President. THE first locomotive
built in the United States was fin
ished and tested at the West Point
IN. W foundry.
1S33-The House of Assembly in Jamaica
passed a bill abolishing slavery.
1S35-Patent office and postoflice in
Washington burned.
1S46-The first regiment to fight against
Mexico was organized IN Plttsburg
1S54-United States and Great Britain
concluded a treaty of commercial re-
ciprocity.
1s56-Christ church. Montreal, de-
stroyed by fire.
1S64-Gen. Dix issued an order for re-
prisals on Canadians because of the
st. Adams raid order annulled later
by President Lincoln.
1S66-French occupation of Rome ter
minated.
1S6S-All disputes between Mexico and
the United States settled by treaty.
1S7O-J. r. Rainey of South Carolina,
the first negro ever elected to the
House of Representatives., sworn in.
1S72-Eleven servant girls persisted in a
fire in the Fifth Avenue Hotel, New
York.
81 England celeDraCeQ the cell
tennial of the Boston Tea Party"
1S91-Sir Oliver Mowat, Liberal prime
minister of Ontario, issued an adj
dress declaring vigorously against
American assimilation.
1894 provincial plebiscite in Prince
Edward Island supported prohibition
of the liquor traffic by an overwhelm-
ing majority.
1S94-E. v. Debs sentenced to six
months Imprisonment for contempt
of court during the great railroad
strike in Chicago.
1s9S-Gen. Galixta Garcia, noted Cuban
leader, died in Washington.
1S99-Maj. Gen. Leonard Wood appoint
ed military governor of Cuba.
19OO-Mgr. Montagnini, secretary of the
Papal Nunciature, expelled from
France by the French government.
19o2-Germany and England Joined in a
naval demonstration against Ven
ezuela.
19O3-William I. Buchanan appointed
United States minister to Panama.
19O6-The new law separating church
and state went into force in France.
1oO7-Norwegian Parliament conferred
the Nobel prize upon President
Roosevelt in recognition of his ser
vices in ending the Russo-Japanese
war.
Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-12-25
No Admittancc for Eggs.

A theatrical company that plays In
repertoire in country villages barred
a citizen Of a Long Island town, not
long ago, when he started to enter
with a basket, after having purchased
a ticket. A writer in the New York
Times tells the story:
One evening a solid-looking citizen,
carrying a basket, bought a ticket and
started to enter the opera house. Just
as he was going in, the OF the
basket unaccountably slipped off. re-
vealing two dozen eggs.
"Hey!" said the tIcket-taker. This
isn't Easter. Where you going with
them eggs?"
"None o. y'r business! Here's my
ticket. all paid for an regl'r," declared
the citizen.
well, there don't any eggs so inside
while I'm here said the ticket-taker (;
and then the other saw the reason his
burden was suspected, and roared with
laughter.
He left the eggs in charge of the
man at the box Office and entered; and
he enjoyed every moment Of the show.
When 1t was over, the manager return
ed the eggs to him. and said:
81 was afraid you might put your
| foot into the basket while you were
a~pplauding."