The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1908-11-08

Gaudily Ornate Stockings En-
able Democrats to Win
the Game.

LII 1OSo WIN tLtef1 COVERING O1 sCcOIcu
wool to such effect that all the Repub.
lieans were mythered and could not
soak ball right for drive.
The Democrats won the big tourna-
ment against the Republicans. They
won by fourteen votes. If the Judge Is
swell Knockers had not been in view
on the greens, there might have been
a different result. As it was the Demo
Gratis won the election and all the poor
club-swinging Repubs were technically
wiped off the earth.
/ This all took place on the Country
Club links yesterday afternoon. Two
teams under the stage names of Re-
publicans and Democrats played a
match tournament. After the golfng
there was big supper and then there
was a smoker Before the jollity COM
menced Walter Dillingham; got up and
told the golfers that there was a propo-
sitiOn to buy more land and more money
was needed for that purpose. He>stated
that the club would issue bonds for all
amounts subscribed and called on those
present who could possibly do so, to
come through.
DR.. Monsarrat was appointed spieler-
in-chief and he soon had them gong.
He singled out those he thought were
likely to start the list and it was not
long before there was a laughing line
of live ones taking the Doctors pills.
Almost before one could say candy
Maclaren an immense amount of
money was subscribed and it was stat
ed by many members that there were
firms and individuals in town who
would willingly subscribe the balance
of the $4,000 needed In ten minutes
ten thousand dollars were subscribed
and DR.. Monsarrat subsidized with
smile of satisfaction.
The entire invitation affair was
grand success. Frank Armstrong was
the deus ex machina and he certainly
machinavated to great effect. There
was a large entry list for the tourna-
ment, everybody found his place with
out trouble, the chowder was not a
chowder, it was feast, not a single
esophagus was dry and the name of
Frank Armstrong was one to conjure
with.
After the internal regions had been
properly ballasted the piano was pulled
into the middle Of the floor and must
clans and songsters began to get busy.
Bob Buchly started the program with
a rendering of Hawaiian airs with
which he made everybody listen and
say something about his wonderful
touch Then Sonny Cunha handed cut
bunch of original rag-time that kept
everybody tapping on the floor and af-
forwards there were songs and recita-
tions that made all the golfers happy.
A certain jingler was called on for
a rhyme on the subject of golf and
then Archie Mahaulu stated that he had
copy of golf poem that must be
recited. Applause made him get up
and tell it off himself and here it is.
One of the cleverest, if not the clever.
est, golf poems ever written:
eff [ had known
That that first bunker was so high and
The sand on either side so soft and
deep,
'Twere better to have played it back,
If [ had known.
If | had known
How many strokes 'twould cost me in
the ditch
Ere I, upon the green, my ball could
pitch,
I would have taken out and counted
one,
If I had known. /
If I had known
That on that measly putt would turn
the game,
would have putted with more care
full aim
And not have lost the hole that was
my own,
If / had known.
IF I had known
That time I chopped, - the parson was
so near
would have used phrase more fit |
to hear
Or else have said it in an undertone,
Had I but known.
IF I had known
Ere this exasperating game [ tried
How often in the dust 'tw0uld lay my |
pride;
If, ere this risky, pesky game I played, |
The pitfalls for unwary feet it laid,
The broken clubs and vows, yea com |
mandments,
Lost balls, lost hopes, lost youth, lost |
innocence,
Had all been spread before my startled |
view
Would I have had the sense the game
t. esehew2
Dr. would still by fond delusion driven |
Have sacrificed my home, my wife, my |
hope of heaven,
IN hope to beat the game that now
beats me?
Would I all this have done
If I had known?
7onfound the luck, there goes the tele-
phone;
Is that you Dick3 All right Today
at one;