The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1908-08-09
MATTER or WEDDING FEES.
Humorous Side OF Marriage as Seen NJ
the Patronage.

l from tHC COHDre00tOHd 1887.
The bridegrooms do drop the ring In e~cstetlo
from under a bookcase once while the BRIDE
groom and his best man leered ~sheepishly ct
my crlmson c~ountenasce; do forget to clasp
hands and often step on tho bridal train at
that crucial second whom the turn Ia made
aisleward. One unhappy creature pulled my
face all askew for one miserable moment by
answering. yes. sir. thank you!" to the query.
ID you take this woman" A later BRIDE
groom added at a private performance In
my W house. ."And mighty glad to get 'er.
yer betl"
The stranger In o stran 60 % and a strange
ceremony furnish the comedy. The clergy
man soon learns the f~altering steps on his
porch. the tumble at his bell. the nervously
twisted hat. the shy pretence at some other
and different business; soon turns confidently
and Immediately TO the nesrest street car post
to discover the half hid fiutter Of bridal skirts.
Still such wisdom takes time. and madame dur
ing the first year Of our own welded life turned
three promising Ave dollar couples from our
door, Then came her eye opening.
was out OF town, and when Hattie Parsons.
q demure, beauless. domesticated variety Of
damsel, appeared at s O'Clock In the company
Of q young mar aud asked for me. madame
assured her that the minister's wife always
does just as WE'LL" q conviction which Hattie
~ w N@Ao @as VIVA ~ ~ ~ eSssso
added vehemence. desperately denied. AT
Z I burst through the front door. glanced into
the parior. beheld o new brown silk never yet
seen at church. gloves INT hat TO match.
seated close to q youth very black as to coat.
white as to tie and radiant as TO patent leather.
why" cried I into madame's astonished
ear. Il didn't know Hattie Parsons was get
ting married or ever thought ofiti"
How did you knowi' she gasped.
Slnoe that day every youthful book agent
with the slightest trepidation Of manner Is
hidden: Come back at D O'Clock. dol The
minister win surely be ip." Some conversa-
tions are uncomfortably thorough.
As to these out Of towners. the city Of my
abiding is full Of them. Situated at the cor
ner OF two other States 1t proves q Grstna
Green for all lovesiok ones. They run TO IL
away from angered parents, suspicious or
spring. conventionalities Of church weddings
the glory and the splendor and the dear
delight 10 they run to us. 1t adds materially
to our meagre incomes.
The fees are O source Of constant palpita-
lions. sometimes Of language. sometimes Of
chasrin. for the minister finds in them all
the unexpectedness and something Of the
excitement Of q gamblers days. One pas
toral brother advised me to keep In stock
two varieties OF certificates and discriminate.
I did. I handed over the u kind to q so cent
couple and bestowed paternally the lax cent
variety on . youth who sraciousiy presented
me in return q SO bin. I don't discriminate
any more.
But the feesl I have been paid so cents. q
quarter. nothing but q promise to KUN
round Saturday when pay envelope comes
in"-which It apparently never did-and
from q dollar up. yet not 30 far up as to be
uncomfortable. But the strangest case arrived
from q hilltop town In Massachusetts,. She
confessed to be thirty She told
the truth. but not all the truth. while his
assertion Of twenty-one was palpably an ex-
aeReration. though there could be no aues-
ton as to his uncouth beauty.
After the ceremony he inquired. wal,
mister. what's tn damage?"
Il hope" cried. politely. mo damage has
been done: but u you refer to the expected
fee. that's rs you deem the service worth"
WAL" asked he. will q dollar and a half
abaout klver't?"
IF that suits You 1t suits me. $ I responded.
Say. Jane. 1 didn't fetch no cash along;
yer pay i'm"
Jane thought II worth o.,