The Idaho Republican. [volume] (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1904-1932, 1908-09-11
HAwLEY TELLS A JOKE.

wv hinuo VI Johes liza
are interesting to listen to. One /,
drummers' yarns and the other Il
lawyers stories. They just get RICH
In and tell 'em, not even using tina
introduction That reminds me.
Hansbrough had just finished telling
something and Hawley Clipped in:
we were up at st. Anthony holding
court and one evening some of us
went over to have a game of solo
There were five of us in the party
as 1t happened. Joe Rich, when he
was on the bench; Sam Rich, nc
small man in avoirdupois; bikes
Millsaps, six foot tall; Hansbrough
here, and myself. all pretty good
sized and aggregating about fourteen
hundred pounds.
Well, we gathered around table
and were enjoying a nice, quiet lit
tie game-we were all fond of play
Ing just a little social hand, and 1t
happened that we were the only ones
In the house besides the. bartender
when In came little bit of fellow
that had never got his growth /;
why, he wasn't bigger than minute
no, he wasn't that big-he would
weigh about hundred pounds if he
was fed up good, and he stopped
about the middle of the floor and
said in an important kind Of way,
IF my cousin was only here would
lick every sun-of-a-gun in the
house."
Well, as matter Of course, we all
looked up and wondered If he meant
us. There was nobody else there,
and one Of the fellows gave a wink
and we all slid out Of our chairs and
went under the table. Then he re-
peated the statement that If his cou-
sin was only there he would lick ev-
cry sun-of-a-gun in the house. The
bartender rushed out from behind
the bar and said, Here, you're in
sulting my guests" and he grabbed
that fellow and Topped him down
and mopped the floor with him. Then
he sat down on him and held him
down, and Joe Rich says to us:
Boys, hadn't we better get out Of
here? He might go and get his cou-
sim"
Gagon commenced where Hawley
left off. There was hold-up In Ida
no Falls one evening and some fellow
who was held up came running up to
the night marshal and began to tell
his troubles and how he had been
relieved of his roll on the street.
When the marshal got chance to
get word in he asked the fellow to
tell him who they were or what they
looked like so he could nail them
before they got away. And the fell
low caught his breath and said,
why, one of them was man about
the size of Sam Rich, and the other
one was great big sun-of-a-gun.
Hawley: can see now where
saved some money by not going to
the Wallace convention. | have a
friend in Boise who has habit of
getting dead broke whenever he goes
anywhere, and always has to ask
somebody for money to go home on.
He went with the bunch, but I don't
know who put up to get him back
home. Somebody did, that's certain.
He used to live in Lewiston and
never came to Boise without being
entirely out of money the day he
started home, and he would always
come to me and get twenty dollars.
Well, ! let him have it, and I'd gen.
orally say as put my hand in my
pocket, II suppose ! might just as
well send you home as to have you
around here. It's as broad as 1t is
long," and he would look at me as
funny. But he would take 1t good
naturedly and explain that just as
soon as he got home he would send
the money back. That he had a case
he had to attend to as soon as he got
there, and the man was perfectly
good and he would get his fee and
make it right with me. But he never
did. He was the best natured fellow
In the world and would forgive you
II you loaned him all you had and
never made him pay it back. In
fact he didn't call 1t a loan--he would
ask'you to let him have 1t. I'VE let
him have lots Of money and the only
time I ever got anything back was
when I just took his own tactics and
asked him to let me have some mon
ey. He wouldn't refuse. why II l
asked him for five hundred dollars
he would 60 out and get It for me
and It would be a pleasure to him
provided he could get It.
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