Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1908-06-10
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"what! Divorced already Why, I
thought they'd be linked for lifc." No;
lack got time on for bad behaviour
Puck.
4 Don't you believe In Ire at flrst
hght?" AT first sight yes; hut some
times you take another look !"-Lon-
don Opinion.
i She Fat the church bazaar) Won't
Fou take u chance on this cake? He
Not on your life. My wife baked IT,
washington Star.
1 Teacher-If you are kind and polite
TO your playmates, what will be the re-
lult? Scholar They'll think they can
lick mel Philadelphia Inquirer.
| Chappie Have cigarette, old mani
sapleigh-No: don't smoke foolkill.
era Chappie Well, don't blame you
Tor refusing to take chances Chicago
Daily News.
Mr.. Lingerlong-I had a que. ad.
venture this afternoon Miss de
Muir with a swift glance at the clock
You mean yesterday afternoon, pre-
sumo Chicago Tribune.
do you think they ever viii find
the North Pole7' he asked. Find It
she responded. Goodness! What
question to ask me. l didn't know Il
was lost. ~ Philadelphia Ledger.
Doctor-I diagnose NIL sickness from
the patients eyes. Now, your right eye
tells me that your kidneys are affected.
| Patient Excuse me, doctor, but my
right is glass eye.-Moodys Maya
zine.
did your ancestors Lave family
tree. Mr.. Maguire?' Family tree 10
1t. ma'am! One Of me ances. con.
trolled TIL intlre timber privilege of the
Garden Of Eden Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Il have been taking some moving pic
lures OF life on your farm" ..,,,id you
ketch the hired man In motlon?r II
think 3d." "Ah. science kin do any.
thing these days. Louisville Courier.
Journal.
/ Wigwag-I believe there's tlnge Of
insanity in all religious enthusiastic.
Henpeckke- Yes. take the Mormons,
for instance; any man that wants mora
than one wife is plumb craz .-Phlla-
delphia Record.
Blox-A scientist claims that men.
tai labor is one Of the chief causes OF
a sallow complexion and wrinkles.
Knox-That may explain why our ION
|gressmen preserve their goods looks.-
Chicago Daily News.
Teacher Who gets the wicked little
boys that stay away from Sunday
school, No answer.) Teacher-Co Come,
you can tell us. Casey. Casey--De
White Sox gifts some, an de Cubs de
rest-The Bohemian. q
Suppose you had dim, !" said the
teacher, "and lost 3 cents. How much
would Pardon me-. interrupted
the precise Boston youth, "but II 1t was
a dime. should have to get 1t changed
sk"-Phlladelphia Press
The Mistress What, Suzanne. going
to leave met Going to get marrledi
This is most upsx lected. The, French
Maid-OqI. madam, but eet ees not ms
fault. Eet was only last night Eat your
son proposed, to me. Harper's Bazaar.
Yes" said the eminent physician,
I'VE are doing much to prolong human
life. "I'm glad to hear IT, answered
i Mr.. Sirius Barker. By prolonglng life
you give a man more time and oppor-
tunity to get together the amount Of
your blll."-Washlngton Star
"Yes. said the old man, "niy daugh-
ter is still studying French" sBut she
can't speak the language at all. can
sheY remarked the friend. 'She
couldn't at first, but now she can speak
It just enough to make herself unIntsl-
iigible, Philadelphia Press.
"Norah, didn't tell you that want
I'd n pitcher Of Ice water the first thing
In the morning?, asked Mrs. Gunson.
"Yis, mum, We did, replied the: new
maid, IAN to make sure thot ye'd get It
tn firststhins left It in front OF TIL
dure last ht."-Brooklyn Life.
"well, there's one thing about our
boarding house" said the optimlst. you
can eat as much as you like there"
"Ot course; same as ours" replied the
pessimist "You can eat as much az
you like. but there's never anything
you could possibly like. "-Philadelphla
Press
Jane--After looking at me for min
,tr t.s,., en-, r,<,.
Jane. that veil improves you great
.|lyy Carrle--Not very complimentary
IJane-No; but what pleased me was
the ane tact he employed In inpartins
an unpleasant thought 30; ton Tram
script.
Excuse me, madam" said the book
| canvasser as spinster who was be.
ginning to carry weight for age opened
the front door, "but are you Interested
in the study Of prehistoric man y II
should say not" replied the giddy old
girl. II am too busy trying to get
man Of to-day Interested In Memo
bile Register.
There's mighty few people," said
Farmer Corntassel. that knevs what
to do with farm after they get on. /.
In hav noticed that" answered the
girl with frizzes 'srhey always insist
on filling the whole place up with corn
1 and oats and things when they might
haye such lovely tennis courts and golf
links. Washington Star.
A Judge of Land.