davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
Just Like a Woman.

\ well known judge had Il habit OF
slipping his watch under his pillow
when he went to bed. One night.
somehow. it slipped down, and rs the
Judge was restless it worked its way
to the foot of the bed.
After a bit lie awolc. and his foot
touched it. 1t felt very cold. and he
was scared and jumped from his bed
and shouted: My gracious, Maria.
There's a toad or something under the
covers. l touched it with my FOOT"
His wife gave Il loud scream and
was on the floor in Il moment.
Nov. don't go waking the ncighbOrs
up" said the judge. You get Il broom
or something, and we'll fix it quick"
Tie broom WAS given him.
Now turn down the covers slowly
while l bang it. Put Il bucket of wa
ter alongside the bed, so as we can
shove it in and drown it,
Maria fixed the bucket and removed
the covers After three or four good
bangs they pushed it i'll the bucket.
and then they took it to the light to
investigate.
When the judge saw it WAS his
watch he said: Il might have known
1t is just like yoH women to 20
screeching and fussing about nothing
It's utterly ruined now" - London
Mail
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
LAUGHTER and INDIGESTION.

~ don't know whether nature fitted
me out with different sort of diges-
tive apparatus from the average man."
remarked il magazine reader, who look
ell UP from the printed page. Here Is
Il writer who sets it down as a SOL
cmn fact that laughter and good cheer
are enemies of dyspepsia Now, when
ever I 20 to n dinner where lot Of
good stories are told or amusing
speeches made and / laugh more than
usual the result for me is an aggra-
vated attack of indigestion. More than
this, and, although | never drink any
thing in the way of intoxicants, | am
certain to have an attack of hiccoushs
as d result Of laughing. which always
amuses my friends who are aware OF
my nondrinking habits. | present the
anomalous picture of perhaps being
the only man at the table who has not
taken drink of any kind, and yet m
actions are those Of q man who har
decidedly too much liquor You can't
make me believe that OLD saw about
laughter being good for digestion in
spite of the solemn gentleman who
wrote this article"-New York Press.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
Which Are You?

In this world there are two kinds
of men-those who look upon the
bright side of things ana those who
walk in the shadow AMI see nothing
but discouragement ahead.
'fhe cheerful man when he sees work
accumulate attacks it heartily AMI soon
clears it away, regarding his work as
fun. The other looks and looks. his
face growing longer each minute, and
then says to himself: How much
work do they expect me To do on my
pay? | can't possibly get through all
this today
then presently when he settles down
to work he finds that the cheerful man
has nearly finished and enyics him
his light job.
lie never thinks d,at the optimist
gets through by WORKING steadily.
without lettering to growl ut what he
has to do The thought that he might
work too hard never occurs to the
cheerful man.
Again, the discontcntc,l one imaglncs
that his employer does not notice his
merits or the reverse and loses inter.
est in his work This Is wrong. for
every employer knows when young
fellow is doing his duty we'll. He may
not have time to give praise PERSONAL
ly. but he knows just the same.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
The Swan.

The common or mute swan tthc lat
ter is the correct nalncl is really al
English bird. though it is better known.
less rare and less expensive than the
three American breeds. the WhistliE.
swan the trumpetcr and the Wloop
ing swan, named obviously for the pc
culiar note each sounds. American
swans are less common than til" niuteS
because OF the fact chat they will not
breed in captivity and also because
they are being killed in great numbers
by hunters, especially by the Eskimos
during the breeding season. when the
birds fly far north The swans nioit
early, before the newly hatehed birs'S
are able to take care of themselves.
and it is 4 popularity of the mott that
all of the wing feathers drop off al
most at the same time, leaving the
birds helpless. While the swans are
in this condition the Eskimos slay
them with clubs, and the destruction
of one pair of adult birds of course
means the death of a nestful of little
ones.-St Louis Republic
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
WELL BURIED.
Two Funerals For Cne Man Provided
For by His VIII.

For by His VIII.
Curious directions for the disposal Of
his remains were left by John Robert
Pringle Of Catford. who died leaving
an estate Of gross value of ES,Ol9 3s. sd.
The tcstator directed:
after my dccease | desire that
competent and trustworthy doctor Of
medicine shall. hy any experiment he
may deem suitable, thoroughly satisfy
himself that life is absolutely extinct.
My carcass Is to he crcmatel ana the
residuum thereof deposited in twometal
urns, numbered respectively | and >.
On the ashes in No. l are To he placed
Il packet, which will he found on my
desk. and my miniature portrait scarf
pin. and on the ashes in urn No. , Il
similar packet. which also will he
found on my desk, and my miniature
portrait finger ring"
He directed that the urnS were then
to be sollcrcd down and No. buried
in his mothers grave at Newport Pag-
nell and the other IN my dear Lizzia's
grave" In the Streatham cemetery ut
footing. He also enjoined his son to
see that the graves of his mother and
of the tcstator's mother were properly
locked aftcr-London Mail.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16

ed a position that was open to me
and came here III the country to be
Kitty's goycrncSs. That's all. There
was nothing secret about it. l thought
If YOU cared very much that you could
easily find me- the girl said bitterly.
thinking Of the long months she had
waited-first hopelessly, then lespond.
entity.
Bradley seized her hands eagerly.
'But, Katharine. you forgot that
your brother and his wife have given
up their fat-they are not in the d.
of getting your address. didn't
know soul who knew you except the
people ut Aunt Ems, and Aunt En-
only knew your brothers address be-
fore he gave up the fiat on Harvard
street"
She gaZed at him wonderingly. II
never thought of that she said slow
ly, "but you seemed to Ike Miss Hind
ly."
Bradley laughed boyishy.
MY dear girl, Miss Kindly was en-
gagged to my brother. II had not been
announced at the time, but he asked
me to be nice to my future sister-in-
law and get acquainted with her."
Katharine leaned forward impul-
sively.
"Then you didn't like her a bit?"
she demanded.
Not a bit-that is, we'll enough for
Il sister-in-law," he conceded.
"Oh." she breathed cantentcdly.
"Oh." he mimicked happily, draw
ing her head to his shoulder.
"Oh," said Kitty. awakening sud-
denly and gazing sleepily at the couple
by the trcside, .'hc isn't Il bit of an
ogre! Hes more like Il hero in my
story book that says, An they lived
happy ever afterward.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
Bloodhound Tracking.

The bloodhound does not necessarily
follow blood. lie hunts what is tech
nically termed 1.-The clean boot that
is, the hound follows the trail of the
hunted person without any adrenti-
tinus aid, and it is the possession and
gradual development of this particu-
lar quality which makes him 50 inter
esting possession to the sportsman
and renders bloodhound tracking Il
sport in which large parties can en-
gage with all the pleasure of the
chase.--Fry's Magazine.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
CUNNING BIRDS.
Stratasem Of the Lapwing and the
Ruse Of the Thrush.

stratasem Of the Lapwing and the
Ruse Of the Thrush.
'The goose is frightful liar said
a nature fakir. 'He quite puts me to
shame"
''Really?"
Really. You know how the goose,
when you draw near it. Kisses? Well.
with that Kissing sound 1t says: Scott,
beware. l am a serpent Yes, from
primeval times the goose has acted
this lie The primeval goose mother.
sitting on her eggs in place OF reeds
and sedge, would not tiy when an in
truder appeared; but. keeping her body
concealed amid the leaves, she would
stretch out her long. flexible neck and
hiss wickcdly. a snake in the grass
the intruder would say to himself as
he retreated. and on her eggs the goose
would chuckle in sly, contemptuous
way.
"The lapwing is another liar. Ap-
proach her nest and she sets up 4 dis
trcssful crying and runs back and forth
in front Of you, trailing one wing as
though 1t were broken. You follow.
You think to snatch her up in your
hands With this lie she lures you
away from her young.
"The thrush in time of drought beats
with his feet on the grass like clog
! dancer Thus he lies to the earth
worms. He makes them think that 1t
is raining. Up they come in silent
haste. and the dcccitful thrush makes
| rich meal.'-New Orleans Times
| Democrat
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16

Golf as II recreation appeals TO prac-
tically all ages. lmpetuous youth.
staid middle age and the man in the
evening walk of life alike feel lis fas-
cination and enjoy its manifold picas-
ures. Golf entails walking. the best
Of exercises for The average man. 1t
trains the eye and the arm. and. while
It tries. II ought also TO train the tenn
per.-I.ivcrpool Courier
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
The House
OF the Ogre.
By TROY ALLISON.
: Copyrighted, 1908, by p. c. Eastment.

Kittie Truesdell clung to her govern
ess' hand and told the story With tire
mors of delight.
''IIe lives up there all alone, Miss
Jarvis" she said in her shrill, childish
voice, 'and nobody knows-just what
-he-eats!' She peered closely at Miss
Jarvis face to see if it We're covered
by an apprecative pallor or other sign
of overwrought nerves.
'Now, Kittic, some one has been fill
ing your little head with fairy tales"
Katharine Jarvis said indulgcntly. 1t
had not been long since she herself be-
lievcd in fairy tales, and even at twcn-
ty-four she could enjoy a game OF
make believe"
"Oh. but Jimmie Darncll said he saw
just an awful looking man there. Jim
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
A Warm Time Comine.

"I'm doin me best with the fire, sir,
said the janitnr mt the door of Gailey's
office one cold morning. but I'm
afraid / can't make 1t very warm for
you. You see. sir
"Ncvcr mind" fcverishly replied Gal
ley, who had been out all night My
wife will he here shortly, expect.
Philadelphia Ledger.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
Standards.

She-AIcn and women can't be jndg-
ed by the same standards. For in
stance. a E:an is known by the com
pany he keeps. IIe-And woman by'
the servants she can't keep.-Judge.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16

Farmer Jones Ito amateur hunter)-
There wasn't better water dawg
livin' until YOU shootin' gents took to
borrowin' i'm. Now is 'ide's that fun
Of shots he'd sink to the bottom like a
brick-ByStander
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
Time to Get Busy.

"But life has no bright sidc!' walled
the pessimist.
''Thcn get busy and polish up the
dark side" rcjoincd the Optimist.-Cht-
cagO News.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16

One Of the most rare kinds of cour-
age is the courage to wait.-St. Louis
GlOlp- Democrat.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1908-04-16
AN THEY LIVED HAPPY EVER AFTER
WARD"

mic peekcd through the hedge and
didn't dare let himself be seen. He
was afraid even then that the man
would say:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Amusement VS.. Vice.

am a great friend to public amuse-
ments; for they keep people from vice.
Samuel Johnson.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Il arm ana
Garden
WINE GRAPES.

Training the Young Vines-Long or
Short Pruning.
BY r. T. BIOLETTI, University of Cali
fornia.
In the autumn or winter following
planting the grapevines should be
staked, either before or after pruning,
but in any case some time before the
buds start in the spring. The kind of
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07

[For testing several varieties at once.1
loops, in which the seeds are placed, is
kept uniformly moist.
The cloth should be moistened before
beginning the experiment and, it is
needless to add, sterilized.
A definite number of seeds taken as
they come from an average sample are
counted out for each termination. For
seeds in rather small lots, as garden
seeds, fifty to a hundred will answer,
while for the cereals, grasses, clover
and others used In extensive cultural
operations about 200 should be used
and the tests duplicated when any
doubt exists about the results. The
tests should be examined from day to
day and the sprouted ones removed
and counted, the number being record
ed on a sheet of paper.
The length of time required for ger
mination Is dependent upon several
factors, chief Of which are moisture,
temperature, vitality and varietal diff
ferences, six to ten days being suf1-
cient for most kinds. When tests are
made during the winter or early spring
months, at which time 1t is usually
most convenient, the termination
should be conducted in a moderately
warm room so that the temperature
will not fall below 80 degrees F. at
night and remain between 70 and 80
degrees F. during the day. In the case
of alfalfa and certain others Of the
clover family a small percentage Of
the seeds will remain apparently sound
at the close of the termination test.
Allowance is usually made for these,
one-third being counted as viable-i. e.,
capable of growth. Caulifower, cab
bage, turnip and beet seeds Of poor
stock. e., run out-are just as Viable
as those of good stock. The only
means of remedying this defect is to
use selected home grown seeds or to
buy the best stock of reliable seed
houSes.-J. J. Thornber.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07

IA, winter pruning; B, spring pruning;
removal of suckers S and thinning OF
shoots WI
stake used will depend on the variety
of vine and method of pruning to be
ultimately adopted.
For ordinary short pruning the stake
should be of such length that, after
being driven into the ground, sufficient
will be below the surface to keep it
firm and prevent it's being loosened by
the force of the wind acting on the
vine, (which is tied to it, and sufficient
above the surface to extend one or two
inches above the height at which it is
intended to head the vines. 1t should
be from one and a quarter to one and
half inches square, according to its
length.
If the vines are to be pruned long
and the canes tied to the stake, five
foot stake will usually be needed, and
this must be stronger, 2 by 2 inches
square. This stake should be driven
two feet into the ground.
These dimensions are all smaller
than are usual in California, but are
quite sufficient for all practical pur-
poses. This stake should be placed
one to two inches from the vine on
the side opposite to the prevailing
heavy winds. The force Of the wind
will thus keep the vine pressed against
the stake, and the tying material is
less liable to break. The first winter
any vines which have made a strong
growth and possess at least one cane,
of which a sufficient length is well
ripened, may be pruned for tying Up.
All the canes are removed entirely ex-
cept the strongest, and this is cut back
to ten, fifteen or eighteen inches, &C
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
TESTING SEEDS.
Convenient Germinators That Will
Meet All Requirements.

Convenient Germinators That Will
Meet All Requirements.
For the ordinary planter the well
known dinner plate tester, made
with two soup or dinner plates and
one or more moist strips of sterlized
cotton goods, preferably cotton flannel,
will be found to answer all purposes
The cotton strips are sterilized In boil
ing water to destroy spores of molds
and other fungi present, folded twice
upon themselves and placed in one Of
the plates. The seeds are now laid be-
tween the folds OF cloth so as not to
touch each other, and the second plate
is inverted over the first, this forming
moist. aerated and more or less
sterile chamber. The cotton strips
must be kept well moistened, but not
saturated, preferably with water that
has been sterilized by boiling, and al
lowed to cool before using. Two or
three lots of seeds may be tested in
the generator at one time, but each
should be continued in separate cot
ton strip and numbered to avoid error
Another Good Method.
When, however, it is desirable to
make several termination tests at one
time or when many varieties are to be
tested, instead of duplicating the plate
germlnators already described the
writer found the following germinator.
suggested by DIR. Volney Spaulding.
formerly of the University of Michi-
gan, to be superior: A deep granite
bread pan six or eight inches wide was
obta ned in which was kept about one
fourth inch Of water. Cotton flannel
strips Of any convenient length, two
or three yards. and Of the width of the
pan, were tucked crosswise at inter
walls Of five inches. Short galvanized
wires about an inch longer than the
width of the pan were inserted through
these tucks and gathered together, thus
forming the cotton strips into numer-
Gus folds or loops which were sus-
pended In the pan above the water by
means of the supporting wires. The
ends of the strips being left sufficiently
long to touch the water in the pan, the
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
The Spanish Peanut.

The Spanish peanut is a plant that
can follow either early crops Of beard
less barley or Dwarf Essex rape, and
by this plan the soil can be kept busy
the year around, and at the same time
the productive capacity will be gradu-
ally increased, says a writer in South
ern Guilty. ator.
1t matters not how attractive the
price of cotton may be later on, the
farmer who is lured into neglecting
planting crops needed at home will be
sure to come out loser, and diversif-
cation ought to be the motto of every
individual, no matter If some folk are
going around crying out that the south
cannot make too much cotton. It is
best to take 10 chances.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
FORCING of tomatoes.

In eastern Virginia the forcing Of
tomatoes in greenhouses can be done
more cheaply than in the north, owing
to the Astounding sunshine in winter
and the absence of the long, dark
spells common on the northern At
lantic coast. For this reason less fuel
will be needed. But the man who I'M
dertakes tomato forcing in any make
shift house will find that his expert
ence has cost him a good deal. In
fact, forcing under glass calls for a
high degree Of skill on the part Of the
gardener, remarks a writer in the
Southern Planter. But in the south
Atlantic coast country the tendency is
In that direction. The use of steam in
the cloth covered lettuce frames in
North Carolina is one step toward real
winter work.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Model of Economy.

a certain farmer, who is noted for
his closeness in money matters, has
a 12-year-old son, who is as Industrious
as his father is penurious.
Recently the father and son made a
compact Whereby the latter would re-
ceive ten cents for every cord of wood
he sawed and piled in the woodshed.
Immediately the boy became very
busy at the woodpile and his earn
ings have been piling up at rapid
rate, his mother keeping her sons
hard-earned savings for him.
What are you going to do with all
your money!" the thrifty youth was
recently asked.
Coin to buy a new saw with It, /"
was the reply.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
The Hummina Bird.

The humming bird in Australia, no
less than man, protects it's habitation
with a lightning rod. The humming
bird before a devastating thunder
storm bursts prudently covers the out
side Of its little nest with cobweb.
Silk is a nonconductor of electricity,
and since cobweb is silk the humming
birds nest is thereby rendered light
ming proOf-EXchange
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07

La, vine pruned to one cane and tied to
stake; B, removal of suckers and
lower shoots w in spring.
cording to the height at which it is in
tended to head the vine. The top
cut is made through a bud, just as in
making a cutting.
The idea to be kept in mind is to cut
back each winter nearly to the ground
that is, to two buds-until a cane is
produced with length Of well ripen-
ed wood and good buds equal to the
height at which the vine is to be
headed. 1t is very important that this
cane should be straight, healthy and
we'll ripened, as it is from it that the
trunk Of the mature vine develops.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Card

This IS to certify that all druggists
are authorized to refund your money
if Foley's Honey and Tar fails to cure
your cough or cold. 1t stops the
cough, heals the lungs and prevents
serious results from cold. Cures la
grippe coughs and prevents pneumonia
and consumption. Contains no OPT
ates. The genuine is in a yellow pack
age. Refuse substitutes.
j. T. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
How to Spray For the Scale.

An authority which recommends the
lime sulphur wash for the San Jose
scale says that every scale must be
touched by the spray in order to be
killed. But very small droplet on
each will be sufficient. To spray sue
cessfully, then, spray thoroughly.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
How Cough Germs Multiply.

When you have a cold the mucous
membrane is inflamed and the disease
germs which you breathe find lodge.
ment and multiply, especially the
pneumonia germ. Foley's Honey and
Tar soothes and heals the 1nf1amed air
passage, stops the cough and expels
the cold from your system. Refuse
substitutes. j. T. Bennett.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07

Now's the time to take Rocky
Mountain Tea. 1t drives out the
germs of winter, builds up the stom-
ach, kidneys and liver. The most
wonderful spring tonic to make PEG :
pie well. You'll be surprised with re-
suits. Soc, Tea or tablets.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Knowledge.

When you know thing, to hold
that you know it; and when you do
not know it; this is Neutrality-suspicious.
fucius.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-03-07
Accidents Amonq seamen.

Deaths from accidents among sea-
men number So per 10000, five times
higher than in dangerous occupa-
TONS"
The Forrest City times., 1908-11-27
What Ould You Do!

In case of a burn or scald what would you do to relieve the pain? Such injuries are liable to occur in any family and everyone should be prepared for them. Chamberlain's Salve applied on soft cloth will re- lieve the pain almost instantly, and unless the injury is a. very severe one, will cause the parts to heal without leaving scar. For sale by J. T. San derS