University Missourian. [volume] (Columbia, Mo.) 1908-1916, 1908-11-02

udTUluOOu
For more than half a century upte,,;
fed has stood,
Where nod the black-eyed Susans to II.
prattle of the rill-
There, there befell the wooing of Penn,
Yam Bill.
"Down yonder in the cottage that !.
nesting in the shade
Of the walnut trees that seem to In.
that quiet little glade,
Abides bonny maiden of the prett,
name of Sue
As pretty as the black-eyed fowts and
quite as modest, too;
And lovers came there by the score
of every age and kind,
But not a one (the story goes) VI.
quite to Susie's mind,
Their signs, their protestations and
their pleadings made her i'll,
When all at once upon the scene hove
Penn-Ya Bill.
He came from old Montana and rode
a brOncho mare,
He had rather owdy-do and rough.
and air,
His trousers were of buckskin and hi.
coat of furry stuff,
His hat was drab of color and its brin
was wide enough;
Upon each leg stalwart boot reached
just above the knee,
And in the belt about his waist his
weapons carried he
A rather strapping lover for our little
Susie, still
She was his choice and he was hers.
was Penn Yam Bill.
"'We wonder that the ivy seeks out
the oaken tree,
And twines her tendrils round him.
though SCARED and gnarled he be,
We wonder that gentle girl, unused
to worldly cares,
Should choose a mate whose life had
been a constant scrap with bears
All! it's the nature of the vine, and of
the maiden, too,
So when the bold Montana boy came
from his lair to WOO,
The fair Kentucky blossom felt all her
heart-strings thrill
to the purring of Penn-Yam
Bill.
l" He told her of his cabin in the noun
tains far away,
Of the catamount that howls by night,
the wolf that yelps by day;
He told her OF the grizzly with the au-
tomato jaw,
He told her of the Injin that eats his
victims raw,
Of the jawhawk with the tawdry crest
and whiskers in his throat,
Of the great goshawful sarpent and the
Rocky Mountain goat
A book as big as Shakespeare's or as
Webster's YOU could fill
With the yarns that emanated from
Penn-Yan Bill.
'Lo, as these mighty prodigies the
mOuntaineer relates,
Her pretty mouth falls wide agape-her
eyes get big as plates,
And when he speaks of varmints that in
the Rockies grow,
She shudders and she clings to him and
timidly cries "Oh!"
Ind then says he, Dear Susie, I'll tell
you what to do;
lou be my wife, and none of these ERE
things shall poster you!"
Ind she-she answers, clinging close and
trembling yet, Il will"-
md then he gives her one big buss does
Penn-Yan Bill.
'Avaunt, ye poet-lovers, with your
wishy -washy lays!
Avaunt, We solemn pedants with your
musty bookish ways!
Avaunt, We smirking dandies, who air
your etiquette
lpon the gold your fathers worked so
long and hard to get,
low empty is your nothingness beside
the sturdy tales
Which mountaineers delight to tell of
border hills and vales-
t snaix that crawl, of beasts that
yawl, of birds that flap and trill
the wild egregious altitude of Penn
Yam Bill.
why, over all these mountain peaks
his honest feet have trod-
o high above the rest of us he seemed
to walk with God;
e breathed the breath of heaven as it
floated pure and free
rom the everlasting snowcaps to the
mighty western sea
e's heard the awful silence that thun-
ders in the ear;
There is a great Jehovah and his bid
ing place is here!"
hese-these the solemn voices and
these the sights that thrill
| far-away Montana of Penny Yam Bill.