davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Where She Should Live.

"What under the SUM-" asked a
father OF his daughter who wanted her
to make a match with a young man
whose only qualification was the pos
session of a goodly fortune-"what
earthly objection can you possibly find
to Mr.. S%priggins?"
HE has habits replied the daugh-
ter, (which l detest! When l marry
| want a husband who does not smoke,
chew, drink, swear, belong to clubs.
play cards, stay out late or go motor.
ing by himself"
The father looked at his daughter
for a moment or two in silence and
then said:
my child, you are but a stranger
here; heaven is your home"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
RAILROAD MAN
Didn't Like Being Starved.

A man running on a railroad has to
be In good condition all the time or he
is liable to do harm to himself and
others.
A clear head is necessary to run a
locomotive or conduct a train. Even
a railroad mans appetite and diges-
ton are matters Of Importance, as the
clear brain and steady hand result
from the healthy appetite followed by
the proper digestion Of food.
"For the past five years." writes a
railroader, 81 have been constantly
troubled with indigestion, Every doc
tor l consulted seemed to want to
starve me to death. First ] was diet
ed on warm water and toast until I
was almost starved; then. when they
would let me eat, the indigestion
would be right back again.
"Only temporary relief came from
remedies. and | tried about all Of them
nBo a friend advised me to try Grape
Nuts food. The very first day I no
ticed that my appetite was satisfied,
which had not been the case before.
that | can remember.
IN a week, l believe. I had more
energy than ever before In my life. !
have gained sever pounds and have
not had a touch of indigestion since
l have been eating Grape-Nuts. When
my wife saw how much good this food
was doing me she thought she would
try 1t awhile, We believe the dis
coverer Of Grape.Nuts found the Per
feet Food"
Name given by Postum Co, Battle
Creek, Mich. Read THE Road to Well
VILE" In pkga. There's q Reason"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
TWO CURES OF ECZEMA
Baby Had Severe Attaek-Grsndfather
Suffered Tcrments with It
Owe Recovery to Cutieura.

"In 1884 my grandson. a babe, had
an attack Of eczema, and after trying
the doctors to the extent of heavy bills
and an increase of the disease and suf-
ferlng, | recommended Cuticura and
in a few weeks the child was well. He
is to-day a strong man and absolutely
free from the disease. A few years
ago | contracted eczema, and became
an intense sufferer. A whole winter
passed without once having on shoes,
nearly from the knees to the toes be.
ing covered with virulent sores. tried
many doctors to no purpose. Then I
procured the Cuticura Remedies and
found immediate improvement and
fnalcure. NJ. ". LaRue. Si5 Seventh St.,
Louisville, KY, Apr. 2S and May IA, 'O7."
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

That an article may be good as well
as cheap. and give entire satisfaction,
Is proven by the extraordinary sale Of
Defiance Starch, each package con.
taining one-third more Starch than
a be had Of any other brand for the
same money.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
His Opinion Of the Dinner.

The guests at a large dinner party
did ample Justice to the tempting
viands as course after course was
served. They were loud in their
praises Of the Chinese cook, of whom
the hostess was Justly proud. They
declared they ate more deli.
cious or appetizing d%elicacies. Final.
ly the Chinaman brought in the last
course, a huge cake heavy with
frosting. He was a converted Chi
naman, and desiring to honor his
religion he had put a motto on the
cake that satisfied his conscience.
II read, prepare to Meet Thy God"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
OF SUCH STUFF ARE DREAMS.
Little Virginia imagined She Had
"Eated Herself"

Little Virginia, three years old,
brought her mother to her nursery a
few nights ago with heartbroken
walls.
What is the matter, dearie? Why
are you screaming so?"
Mamma, am | all here?"
Certainly you are all here, right in
your bed"
But, mamma, feel of me, see II I'm
all here. Are my feet fere and the
top of my head. both?'
Certainly, Virginia, every bit Of
you is here, tucked in your little
trundlc bed. Why do you think you
are not?"
Il dreamed"-this with another
great sob-'I dreamed was a choco-
late stick and had Gated myself"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
TakInu His Measure,

do you yer drink to excess?" asked
the girls father.
81 never touch liquor Of any kind,
sir"
How about tobacco?"
IL do not smoke. l have had
a cigar or a cigarette In my mouth"
Ever gamble?"
"Never. l do not know one card
from another"
II suppose you swear sometimes?"
mo, sir. An oath has never passed
my lips"
"Um. All right. Come out and have
. stick Of candy with me-"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Universal Language.

He spoke his love in German-she
answered not a word. In French he
tried to WOO her-the maiden never
heard. He tried his luck In English.
In Irish-all In vain; in Greek, Turkish
and Latin, and in the tongue Of Spain.
And then an inspiration came to the
anguished youth. "The universal
language" he cried, "I1l try, for
sooth!" He kissed the demure maiden
and pressed her to his breast; she
understood that language, and-well,
you know the rest.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
The Siarfish AnalYxed.

The starish, one of the lowest forms
of life, has on its back about $4,000
Jaws or hands arranged in rings and
bands. By the aid of these 1t cap.
lures many animals for food, even
quick, active fish of considerable size.
Prof, jennings of Johns Hopkins has
photographed the starfish at dinner.
and has discovered that even this low
form Of animal life has habits"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Priest a Famous Mountain Climber

The Able Correct, who climbed every
important peak In the Swiss AMI ltal'
ian Alps and who was the first to as
cend the Matterhorn from the Italian
side, has died at Aosta, aged 10,
He taught Alpinism to the present
king OF Italy and was well acquainted
with the late King Humbert, who
called him the Mountain Bear
Able Correct, who vas born Of hum.
BILE parents, began life as a guide, He
was a man of superb physique and
was noted in his younger days for his
feats of strength.
By studying at night he passed his
examinations as Il clerical student
and became n priest. He soon relin
pushed parochial duties, however, and
retired to a cottage in the mountains
where he spent his time writing books
on the Alps and climbing.
He was an intimate friend of Tyn.
DAN and many other well known Eng
fish Alpinists of the old school.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

The chauffeur's Thouaht.

A well.known Englishman tells a
good motor.car story. He says that
on n occasion, when instructing his
chauffeur to drive carefully, he re-
marked: Il don't mind about grown
up people and dogs. but do be careful
about children and babies" Whereup'
on the chauffeur replied: Eyes. them
feeding.bottles do cut up the tires
dreadful"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Starch, like everything else, is be-
ing constantly improved. the patent
Starches put on the market 25 years
ago are very different and inferior to
those of the present day. In the lat.
est Observation-Disclosures Starch-all In
furious chemicals are omitted, while
the addition of another ingredient, In
vented by us, gives to the Starch q
strength and smoothness never ap-
preached by other brands.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
THE TIFF.
He Was WILLING.

In the morning mail the busy editor
found the following written on a pos.
tai card: Dear Sri have just grad
uated from a correspondence school
OF journalism. Would you like to
have me write for your paper? j.
Alexander McNutt."
Selling his trusty pencil, the busy
editor dashed off the following reply:
Dear j.. Alex.-Certainly We would
be pleased to have you write for our
paper. Kindly address your letter to
the circulation manager and inclose
the regular subscription price"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Laundry work at home would be
much more satisfactory II the right
Starch were used. In order to get the
desired stiffness, 1t is usually neces-
sary to use SO much starch that the
beauty and ineness of the fabric is
hidden behind a paste of varying
thickness, which not only destroys tie
appearance, but also affects the wear.
Ing quality of the goods. This trou-
BILE can be entirely overcome by using
Defiance Starch. As 1t a be applied
much nor thinly because of its great
err strength than other makes.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

With a smooth iron and Defiance
Starch, you can launder our shirt.
waist Just as well at home as the
steam laundry can; it will have the
proper stiffness and finish, there will
be less wear and tear of the goods,
and 1t will be a positive pleasure to
use a Starch that does not stick to the
iron
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

David Belasco, the playwright and
idols. Strange he said, the fasci-
nation that they exert upon young
girls. | overheard the other day a
literary conversation that is apropos.
Two men were ~conversing, did you
ever read Sh~akespeare's Loves La
Dor Lost"?' said the first, No.
growled the second bald head, but
I've taken my best girl to the theater,
and heard her ave all through the
show about the leading mans heaven.
~ hair"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Give Defiance Starch a fair trial
try 1t for both hot and cold starching,
and II you don't think you do better
work, in less time and at smaller cost,
return 1t and your grocer will give you
back your money.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Insured.

Il suppose you will be very careful
rot to make any mistakes during your
first term"
"Mistakes!" echoed the new mem.
Der. Il should say not, l am so
completely sighted that ! don't even
get a chance to make mistakes"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Was an Attendant.

As the new minister was OF hia way
to evening service in the village he
met a young man whom he was anx.
ious to have become an active member
OF the congregation.
Good evening, my young friend"
he said, solemnly. DO you ever at.
tend a place of Worship"
Eyes, indeed, sir; regularly every
Sunday night" replied the young man,
with a smile. I'm on my way to see
her now.n
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
An Official Accident.

you say your railway Is suffering
from an accident?"
Yes" answered Mr.. Dustin StaX,
IT'S terrible to ncar the cries of the
injured stockholders
ITO what accident do you %refer?"
The president of the road"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Scattering Sunshine.

"Children make life lots brighter
and happier"
YES" answered Mr.. Sirius Barker.
IF 1t weren't for children we wouldn't
have any excuse for going to the cir.
Gus In summer nor for fooling with
mechanical toys during the holidays"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
The Object,

81 suppose" said the oid.time
friend. you retired from business 80
that you could enjoy a rest?"
That's what ! thought" answered
Mr.. Cumrox. but mother and the
girls have explained to me that it was
in order to give me time to help In
their social activities"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

We'll" growled the first man at the
Ave o'clock tea, IF II were not for my
wife ! wouldn't be here"
mo, hang It! and neither would | II
It were not for my wife. I'm the host.
ess' husband"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

herited kidney trou-
BILE grew steadily
worse with me unit
SO nervous | could
not sleep at night. |
was dizzy and spots
fioated before my
eyes. My back and
hips ached and every
cold settled on my
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

kidneys and made me worse. | have
used many different medicines and
was discouraged when | began with
Doan's Kidney Pills, but now the
symptoms that alarmed me are gone
Sold by all dealers, so cents a box.
Foster.Milburn Co, Buffalo. N. Y.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

We ought not to look back unless
It is to derive useful lessons from
past errors and for the purpose OF
profting by d%ear.bought experience.
George Washington.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Natural Affinity,

$50 Dummit is doing very we'll In
the west. | always said there is a
place for every man II he only follows
the lines Of his natural bent. What is
he doing?"
He's yindicating your theory. He's
an agent for a natural gas company"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
MPATH

He-Yaas! Several years ago I
fell in love with a girl, but she re.
5ected me-made a regular fool Of
me, in fact.
She-How sad! And you've never
rot oyer Il,
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Had Its Uses.

81 love to Whit the aroma OF the
burning leaves" said the poetical girl,
as they strolled through the park.
80 do l." replied her tall escort;
at browns the odor Of gasoline from
the automobiles"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Sheer white goods, in fact, any fine
wash goods when new, owe much Of
their attractiveness to the way they
are laundered. this being done In a
manner to enhance their textile beau
ty. Home laundering would be equal.
ly satisfactory II proper attention was
given to starching, the first essential
being good Starch, which has sufficient
strength TO s%tiffen, without t~hickening
the goods. Try Defiance Starch and
you will be pleasantly surprised at the
improved appearance Of your work.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Your Wife. Mother or Sister

Can make Lemon, Chocolate and Custard
pies better than the expert cook by using
"OUR-PIE,' us all the ingredients are In
the package ready for immediate use.
Each package, enough for two large pies,
10 cents, order to-day from you grocer.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Americans Fond Of Oysters.

According to the United States bu
e a Of statistics, It appears that the
production of oysters in the United
States exceeds 10000, 900 bushels pei
n u
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Many Professional Men,

clergymen, teachers and singers use
Browns Bronchial Troches for curing
hoarseness and coughs.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
A Sore Puzzle.

"How did that secret yer get out?"
II can't imagine. She only told
about a dozen of her acquaintsnces In
strict confidence"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Occasionally a woman is glad when
her husband makes her cry, because
she can work him for a peace offer.
ing.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
"MerciIess Nature"

Nature Is ~inexorable. merciless, and
those who habitually Haunt her rare
ly live long to continue the affront.-
Queen.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
Farmers Attention.!
Go to Southwest Texas and Look at the Famous
Simmons Ranch.
10 to GAO Acres and Two Town Lots for S210. Payable $40 per Month
Without Interest.
Read the ~Following:

FL Reno, Okla, April II, 1907
D. {. +. Simmons, San Antonio, Texas;
Dear Sir have just returned from a visit to your lands in Atascosa
County. left FL Rem. on the 2d of this month, for the purpose of look.
ing over Southwest Texas, and especially your land, with a view of kcat-
ing in Texas if suited.
spent two nights and a day on your ranch, and while there 1 was in
the MusWve, Brown, Turkey Creek, Muey COW and Erenchman pas
lures, and made as complete an examination. of the property as ! could
body of land that have seen in Southwest Texas and have looked over
considerable lands in Texas.
was agrceaby surprised at the quality of the soil on this ranch. It
was much better than | expected to see, and l consider it a most favor
able opportunity for a poor man to get a good home.
The soil Is what, l would call dark and red chocolate loami with on-
sonaly a it'll. sand. which consider a benefit in SON respects, rather
than a hndrance.
l have been engaged in farming and ranching about all my life, ard
have had much experience in raising, alfalfa in Kansas and Oklahoma, in
my mind there is no question but that the black land On your ranch is
especially adapted to the successful growing of alfalfa, which consider
the most valuable farm crop that ny farmer can rae. While in San
Antonio, saw fresh alfalfa hay OF the wagon, and it was selling for $500
per ton, loose hay, With the long seasons you have in Texas, and proper
irrigation, you should get at least seven OF eight cuttings OF alfalfa a year
l saw the large artesan well att the Headquarters ranch, and must say
i is the finest artesan well l evers saw, and is fully up to your representa-
tions in every respect,
If the land is undeAaid with artcdan water,as I am satisfied it is I
made a success
consider that you are giving the people a great opportunity to secure
As far as I have seen, I am perfectly free to say that you have repre-
snted your property fairly, that the description yu give of it in your
literature is not verdrawn.
If you desire it, you have my permission TO refer N persons inquhing
about tMs, land o me. and will be cry glad to answer any inquiries made
of m with reference to IL.
| appreciate the kindness. extended to me while on the ranch.
With best Wishes l remain, Yours very truly, c. Il. HULIr.
Write for literature and Views Of the Ranch, and name of nearest agen,
DIR. c. r. SIMMONS,
2io Alamo Plaza, SAN ANTONIO, TEXAS
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Garfield Tea purifes the blood, eradi-
eating rheumatlsm, govt and other ehron;
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Smokers appreciate the quality value OF
Lewis Single Binder cigar. Your dealer
or Lewis Factory, Peoria, Ill.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Lewis Single Binder - the famous
straight Sc cigar, always best quality.
Your dealer or Lewis Factory, Peoria, III.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

An ounce of help is better than a
ton of hot air on the subject.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
REASON FOR woMEN's "NERvEo"
In Very Many Cases IL 10 weakened
Kidneys.

Mrs. Frank Roseboom, 5l2 8. Wash
ington St, MOSCOW, Idaho, says: In.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

For he that once is good is ever
great-Ben Johnson.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

To bear is to conquer our fate
Campbell.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Our great care should be not to
live long, but to live well.-Seneca-
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Better die 10000 deaths than wound
my honor.-Addison.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

II think 1t is really going to un-
fair extremes when Mabel gets me on
the telephone Just to give me a scold.
ing"
why SOL"
Because she calls me up only to call
me down"
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Love of our neighbo: is the only
door u of the dungeon Of SELF
George Macdonald,
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

ONLY ONE "BROMO QUININE"
That is LAXATIVE RON QUININE, Look for
the signature OF u. W. GRovE, Used the World
over 10 Cure n Cold In ono Day. &c.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16
STATE OF ONO. CRY or TOLEDO a.

LUCAS CouTY.
FRANK J. CHESEY makes oath that he Is senior
partner OF the nrm OF +. j. CHEsKy 4 Co, doing
business In the city " Toledo, County and state
Aforesaid, and that said arm will pay the sum OF
y HUNDRED DOLLARS for each aud every
case Of CArARRH that cannot be cured by the use Of
HALLS CArARRu CURE.
FRANK J.. CHENEY
sworn 90 before me and subscribed In my presence,
tails 9Th day Of December, A. D., 1855.
49, A. W. GLEASON,
ekAI NOTARY PUBLIC.
Halls Catarrh Cure 10 taken internally and acts
directly On the blood and mucous surfaces OF the
system. send for testimonials, free.
r.. J. CHENEY d CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by all Druggists, 75o,
Take Hall' Family Plls for constipation.
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Stern PARENT hadn't any Of the
advantages o have had. How do
you suppose l have got on as l have?
Young Hopeless Intending to make
a soothing reply)-Er-I expect the
grass wouldn't grow under your feet,
slrt
Morgan County republican. (Versailles, Mo.) 1906-1914, 1908-01-16

Calamity is mans true tombstone.
Beaumont.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1908-06-16
NJ 'CLELLhN HAD
CHICAGO BILLET
His Law Graduation Was In
terrupted by Call From
kaIaniana0Ie.
BY Ernest G. Walker.

|" (Mail Special to the Advertiser.)
WASHINGTON, d. c., June 4.-Del-
egate Kalanianaole telegraphed here
| this morning asking that Mr.. George
B. Mcclellan hasten to Chicago to use
the proxy of National Committeeman
Robertson at the meetings which be-
gin tomorrow This was occasioned
by the death of the Delegates brother,
which necessitatas his Fastening to
San Francisco.
Mr.. Mcclellan was in the midst of
Washington University Law School
and was to have taken his bar exami-
nation forthwith. AS it is, he has de-
cided to postpone taking the examina-
ton and will go at once to Chicago.
Many friends of Hawaii in the Senate
and the House We're very anxious that
the Hawaiian proxy should be at Chi
cago.
The other local event of Hawaiian
interest here this week is the depav-
ture of Secretary of the Interior Gar
field for Honolulu. He will travel
from San Francisco on the battleship
Maine and will spend considerable
time visiting the various Hawaiian is
lands. Perhaps his trip will not be all
business. but undoubtedly the Secre-
tary will take occasion to examine
carefully many questions affecting the
administration of the Territory. He
will study the public land question and
probably will give some attention 20
immigration, although that is not
question which belongs to his depart
mtnt.
Some steps have been taken with
reference to the pineapple cases. Mr..
Mcclellan has been to the Department
of Justice consulting with its officials,