davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
NORWEGIAN LUTHERAN

REV. CHR CHRIsTIANsON, Faster.
Services every Sunday at 1890 a. m. and
7:45 p. m. Sunday School at 1900 noon.
Prayer meeting every Thursday evening at
500. Ladies Aid Society meeting every
other Wednesday afternoon. Helping Hand
Society every other Wednesday evening.
All services in the Norwegian language ex-
cept Sunday evening. Services every third
sunday which is held in the English language
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Forsot to Put In the Baby.

A young mother was walking with
her husband on the Atlantic City board
walk. Suddenly she gave little cry
Of pleasure.
ooh, there is nurse-nurse wheeling
baby"
She ran lightly to the luxurious
coach Of leather, with its swan shaped
carriage and it's rubber tired wheels,
and pushed back the parasol that shad-
ed the occupant from the sun. Then
she gave great start.
"Why, nurse" she cried, where's
baby|
Goodness gracious, ma'am! ! for
got to put him in"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

n Cheerfui VICTIM.
Hon. Wilfred Hosford and his wife
did not believe in nicknames, nor did
they intend their boy to have one II
they could prevent It,
II was never known as Will or Will
ly," said Mr.. Hosford. with dignity,
land l see no reason why my son,
Wilfred Sawtell Hosford, should re-
ceive either of those names or the still
more Objectionable one Of Bill"
Wilfred Sawtell Hosford was deli
cate for the first ten years Of his life
and received his education at the hands
of grave young tutor. He grew stron-
ger as time went ON and at the age Of
twelve entered the public school.
On his return from the first session
he was solemnly questioned by his
parents.
1.-THE boys are going to like me,
guess" said Wilfred eagerly. They've
got nickname for me already"
Mrs. Hosford shuddered. and the IA
Their looked stern.
"Do you mean to say you enjoy being
called Willy or Bill?' he asked in his
deepest tones.
"Oh, they've got better name than
those" said the boy, with a broad grim
"The srnartest fellow in the class,
Sandy Lane, thought it up almost right
off as soon as he heard my name.
They're going to call me Saw-Hoss."
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

Heavy, impure blood makes a
muddy, pimpIy complexion, head
aches, nausea, INDIGESTION. Thin
blood makes you weak, pale, sickly.
Burdock Blood B;tters makes the
blood rich, red. pure-restore per-
feet health.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
THE SWEETEST LIVES.

THE SWEETEST LIVES.
The sweetest lives are those to duty wed
Whose deeds, both great and small,
Are close knit strands Of an unbrol1en
thread
Where love ennobleS all.
The world may sound no trumpets. ring
no bells
The book Of life the shining record tells.
Thy love shall chant its own beatitudes
After it's own life workings. A child's
kiss
Set on thy singing lips shall make thee
glad.
A poor man served by thee shall make
thee rich.
A sick man helped by thee shall make
thee strong.
Thou shalt be served myself by every
sense
OF service which thou renderest.
Mrs. Browning.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Lipton's First Assistant.

Sir Thomas Upton started business
with one assistant, boy Of fourteen.
One day the lad was overheard COM
planning that his clothes were so shah
by he could not go to Sunday school.
Upton took a small amount from his
carefully boarded saving and bought
the boy suit of blue cloth.
The next day the boy didn't come to
work, and Mr.. Upton, meeting his
mother In the street, asked her the
reason.
"Why, Mr.. Lipton," she said, curtsy-
ing, Jimmy looks so respectable,
thanks to you, sir, that l thought l
would send him around the town to-
day to see If he couldn't get better
lob"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Judament YES Confirmed.

A certain old time justice Of the
peace, wishing to bring suit against a
citizen, consulted the statutes and
found that suits of such a character
might be brought before any justice
of the peace
"Well, them" thought he, "I'll just
try the case myself"
Straightway he made out writ
against his adversary and signed it.
On the day set for trial the defendant
appeared with counsel. Both gentle
men not unnaturally objected to the
constitution Of the court.
"Why," demanded the justice, edo
you deny that am a Justice Of the
peace"
The lawyer would not contest this
point, but argued that such a construc-
ton Of the law was against all sense
and reason.
A vigorous alteration ensued, and
then the judge remarked that not for
the world would he have two gentle
men suppose him governed by any per.
sonal considerations. 81 will there
FORE" he added gracefully, 'render
Judgment against myself and then
appeal to the supreme court"
"But the mischief Of it was," said
the justice, relating the story after
ward, "that when my judgment got to
the supreme court it was unanimously
reaffirmed."
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Wide Awake.

Fuddle-You know Stocks, don't you?
Doctor-Yes, indeed. He Is now pa
tent of mine. Fuddle-Pretty wide
awake man, isn't he? Doctor should
say So 1 am treating him for insom-
nia.-LOndOn Tit-Bits.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
A SUGGESTION From Japan.

A Suggestion From Japan.
A young Japanese, with the national
love of cleanliness, came to London to
study. AS he was a stranger in the
city he had to select his own lodgings.
His first choice was not happy. The
hall especially was very dirty. This
the newcomer did not like, but decided
to say nothing then.
One rainy day the maidservant put
ND this notice: "Please wipe your feet"
Selling his opportunity, the Japanese
student wrote underneath, con going
oNt."-Ladies' Home Journal.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
A Good Reason.

A Good Reason.
The late King Oscar Of Sweden once
took part In a discussion when travel
ing incognitO in the smoking room of
Wiesbaden hotel. A Republican
took the floor and felt that he had con-
vinced everybody except a certain
white bearded old gentleman sitting at
an adjacent table. He turned upon
him. You don't seem convinced by
my arguments, sir" he said. "Per-
haps you are Monarchist."
The white bearded old gentleman adj
mitted that he was.
"Then, sir, would you mind giving
your reasons for preferring a mon
archical form Of government"
Certainly" replied the stranger,
who was none other than Oscar IL.
1.-THE first and foremost reason Is that
I am myself king"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
The
Scrap Book
What He Needed.

Chauncey Olcott once visited the
wishing we'll at Killarney with two
plain, elderly spinsters. Beside the
well sat an old woman, who looked up
into Mr.. Olcott's face and asked:
"Phwat are you wishin' forY
what do you think I wish for?" he
good naturally inquired.
-"Och, for beautiful young swate-
heart, of course"
He pointed to the two spinsters, who
stood at little distance.
Don't you see have two with me?'
'Ah, thin, it's the grace o. God you're
wishin' for"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Quite the Contrary.

The Sympathetic Friend-It must be
very hard to lose money at the races.
Smith "a plunger)-Hard! Hang II,
old chap, it's the easiest thing In the
ld!-London Opinion.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Why He Wore a Belt.

Why He Wore a Belt.
'The late Admiral Walker" said a
naval officer in Washington, always
urged sailors to wed. Nautical bach
elors were held up to scorn by him.
Strolling with him in New York one
day, we met a young ship broker. The
admiral clapped him on the back,
wrung his hand and cried:
Congratulations on your marriage,
my young friend. No more sewing on
of buttons now, ehr
mo, indeed; wear belt now. 1t
keeps me SO busy raising the money
to pay my wife's bills that have no
time to sew on buttons"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
The LAUGHTER of Childhood.

The Laughter of Childhood.
The laugh Of child will make the
hottest day more sacred still. Strike
with hand of fire, o weird musician.
thy harp strung with Apollo's golden
hair: fill the vast cathedral aisles with
symphonies sweet and dim, deft touch
er of the organ keys; blow, bugler,
blow until thy silver notes do touch
and kiss the moonlit waves and charm
the lovers wandering mid vine clad
hills. But know your sweetest strains
are discords all compared with child
hoods happy laugh-the laugh that
fills the eyes with light and every
heart with joy.
o ripping river Of laughter, thou art
the blessed boundary line between the
beasts and men, and every hayward
wave Of thine doth drown some fretful
fiend Of care.
o Laughter, rose Tipped daughter of
Joy, there are dimples enough in thy
cheeks to catch and hold and glorify
all the fears of grief.-Robert G. In
gersoll.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

GERMAN EV. LUTHERAN.
Services will be held at 1000 a. m. except
last Sunday of the month. Sunday School
every Sunday at HOO. @. GUTEKUNsT,
Pastor.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
fHE ORIGINAL LAXATIVE COUGH SYRUP
KEMNEDYS LAXATIVE HONEY@TAR
Red flower Blossom and Honey Bee on Every BEETLE.
A Card

We, the undersigned, do hereby
agree to refund the money on 90
cent bottle of Green's warranted
Syrup OF Tar if it fails to cure your
cough or cold We also guarantee
25-cent bottle to prove satisfact-
Dry or money refunded. Fox Bros,
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

There is no use running. To set out
in time is the main point.-La Fon-
tame.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Nj, e.
REV, N. S. HANSON, Pastor.

REV, N. S. HANSON Pastor.
Services every Sunday at 1O:45 a. m. and
800 o. m. Sabbath School 1900 n, Epworth
League at 700 p. m. Prayer meeting every
Thursday ut 500 p, m. Glass meeting every
Tuesday at scoop. N. at the houses
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

WANTED-By Chicago whole
sale and mail order house, assistant
manager oman or woman) for this
county and adjoining territory.
Salary 500 and expenses paid week
ly; expense money advanced. Work
pleasant, position permanent. No
investment or experience required.
Spare time valuable. Write at once
fer full particulars and enclose self
addressed envelope, Address GEN
ERAL MANAGER, 1874 f. Lake
ST., Chicago.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
1t Served Him Riuht.

t SERVED HIM KI9ht.
Two Irishmen, meeting one day,
were discussing local news.
do you know Jim Skelly?" asked
Pat.
Faith" said Mike, IAN l do"
"Well, he has had his appendix taken
away from him."
"Ye don't say so? Well, it serves
him right. He should have had 1t in
his wife's name."-Everybody'
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
CONGREGATIONAL CHURCH.
J.R,WEISE, p aston.

Services every.Sunday at 1O:45 a. m. and
7:3Op m. Sabbath School at IL IA, Christ
ian Endeavor service at $3.50 p. m. All are
cordially AnYited.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Love and Finance.

Love and Finance.
"Oh, Henry" exclaimed his wife as
she threw her arms rapturously about
his neck, II do love you SO! Don't
forget to leave me $25 before you 60
to town this morning, will you, dearY'
"And this" muttered Henry, softly
disengaging himself from her fond
embrace, ''this is what you might call
being hard pressed for money"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
With an Eye to Business.

With an Eye to Business.
At a dinner given in Washington in
honor of Admiral Dewey's SEVENTEEN
birthday the famous sailor after drink
Ing from Il loving cup that belonged tp
George Washington said:
"This wine is superb. 1t is as fine
in its way as the sign that / once saw
over an inn door In Germany. The
sign read:
"tGood beer sold here. but don't take
my word for 1t. Hans Schwartz,
Prop"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Poor Land.

Poor Land.
Once a Kansas farmer met on the
hot dusty road homesteader pushing
on excitedly toward the Cherokee strip.
"Whar We bound?' said the farmer.
"Fer a hundred and sixty acres O.
free land in the strip" was the reply.
And the man vanished in the glitter
of dust and sunshine.
A month or two went by, and on the
same dusty road the Kansas farmer
met the homesteader returning.
"Hello," he said, what We done with
them hundred and sixty acresT'
The homesteader pointed his whip
proudly toward his mule team.
"See them mules?" said he. "Well,
I traded eighty acres of my claim fer
'em."
"What We do with the other eightyY'
"Don't gimme away" was the re-
ply, "but the feller was a tenderfoot,
and l run in the other eighty acres on
him without his KNOWN it."
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

Curious of the
"Have you fixed up my will just the
way 1 told your" asked the sick man,
who was the possessor Of many needy
relatives and some well to do but grasp
ing ones.
81 have" asserted the lawyer.
"Just as strong and tight as you can
make it, eh?" asked the client.
Tho Ia =. or nodded.
All right" said the sick man. 'Now
I want to ask you one thing-not pro-
fessionally-whod do you think stands
the best chance of getting the property
when I'm gone?"-Youth's Companion.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
Are You Making

MOnnvp We will give you
-.-0nO y. big cash Commits
sions ana Valuable prizes for each
subscription secured. None of
the prizes are competitive. You
can find out how you can do this
by writing to the METROPOLI-
TAN Magazine for particulars
concerning it's great Subscription
Campaign and the inducements
which are being offered to Repre-
sentatives. Equally interes ting
to old and young. Address
The Metropolitan Magazine
West Twenty Street
New York City
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
The Confused BRIDEGROOM.

A bashful young man and his intend
ed bride drove to the minister's resi-
dence and in the presence of a few
friends went safely through the cere-
mony. On the minister pronouncing
them husband and wife the young
bridegroom did not seem fully able to
meet the situation. The bride stood
blushing at his side. and he did not
seem to realize that something needed
to be said or done, but he was evident
~ intensely embarrassed. He stood an
instant on one foot and then an instant
on the other. but suddenly a happy
thought seemed to strike him and,
grasping the BRIDES hand, ne shook it
heartily, exclaiming. "Allow me to con-
graduate you!"-Ladies' Home Journal.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20
City Officers.

Washbur' Public Library Board.
N. n. Oscar, president: w. Ii. Irish.
vice-president, e. Bryan, secretary; w.
Ii. Irish, Charles Jefferson, Mrs. VIM. O'Neil,
5. A. Oscar, Bryan. Mrs, James A
Sheridan,
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1908-08-20

Foresishted Philanthropy.
"Some years ago, when was United
states minister to Turkey" said Presi.
dent Angel Of the University of Michi
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
STEAM SUBSTITUTE
ON BIG STEAMSHIPS.
Maxim's New Motive Power, He Claims,
Will Revolutionize Fighting and
Merchant Marine.

NEW YORK, dan. 6.--A new motive
power. known "motorite," which is ex
pectcd to revolutionize torredoes and tor
pedo boats, and possibly in the fltuie r..
place steam motive power for ocean
going vessels. has been invented, It is ~
nounced. by Hudson Maxim, the wei.
known inventor,
"Motorite'' which is the basis of thu
torpedo ard the torpedo boat is said to he
a combination of certain powerful expIo-
sives and by means of IT torpedoes ana
torpedo boats are propelled through the
water at great speed MIR. Maxim saws
that an ordinary sized torpedo can i,e
sent through the water at a speed of sixty
miles an honr, while the best of the pres.
ent gasoline driven projeetiies do not
travel faster than thirty five miles an hoar
Mr. MaXims new model torpedo boat
which is practically submerged, can be
propelled, the inventor says, at rate OF
from fiftv-f1ve to sixty miles an hour
With boat going at this speed and tor
pedo travelling at twice the present spee1
and for more than twice the distance now
possible, Mr.. Maxim believes he has made
a discovery which VIII revolutionize the
building OF warships
The inventor is also of the opinion that
his new motive power will sooner or later
come into use on merchant vessels ana
will double their speed. He declines to
give details of 'motorlte'' until his appli.
cations for patents, now pending, have
been acted upon.
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
WILLIAMS HAS
NEW BANKING
MEASURE
Roosevelt Urges Congress
to Consider Chilli
Exposition.

WASHINGTON, Jan. 6.-RepresentatiVe
John Sharp williams, of Mississippi, to-
dav introduced a bill repeating the Ia"
directing that three-fifths of the 10 per
cent. of the reserve of the national banks
may consist of balances due bank aVaii-
able for the redemption of its circulating
notes from banks approved by the Comp
trolier of the Currency; and repeating all
laws permitting national banks to keep
three-fifths of their reserves In nauohai
banks in reserve ,ities.
If this bill becomes a law not less than
opa-balf of national bank reserves now
,oo,,;red to be kept in lawful money In
aontral reserve cities hereafter must be
held in gold or gold certificates. The bill
is to become effective July /, 1905.
message from President Roosevelt
was read in the House today urging par
ticination by the government in the nrst
Pan-American Scientific Congress, to De
hold in Santiago. Chilli the first ten days
of December 1908. To provide for fitting
representation the President urges timeiy
appropriation. The congress, he saio,
could not fail to be of great interest anu
Importance to the governments and 10 the
people of all the American republcs
Representative Hardy Baseom Slemp' Oh
the Ninth Virginia District, took the oath
of office.
The Senate was in session only four
minutes today. adjournng upon the adop-
ton of resolutions introduced by Senator
Taliaferro, in respect to the death of the
late Senator Mallory, of Florida
The House, after a half-hour's session,
also adjourned until tomorrow out OF re-
spect for the memory OF. Senator Mallory.
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
ERIE'S NEW TARIFF
EFFECTIVE FEBRUARY 10.
other Roads to Retaliate and Rate War
Will Be Carried Into Western
Territory.


CHICAGO, Jan. 6-Passenger rates
between Chicago and the East are to be
slashed right and left after February
10. On that date the Erie's new tariff
will become effective, and ii Is prac-
tically certain all rates on that line
east of Marion, o., will be cut The
other roads will be forced to retaliate
and it is more than possible the war
will be carried into the Western terri
tory as we'll.
AT the meeting of the Chicago Rail-
road Association it was agreed that
all Erie rates in the Chicago rate
sheet the official publication of the
association, should be Cancelled on
February 10. Dilatory tactics were re-
sorted to by the passenger men of the
other lines, and the meeting was pro-
longed over two days in the hope that
tile Erie would be forced to announce
what rates it proposes to put in
The only concession made by the
Erie. however, was to tell when the
rates will be effective. This means
that. since a road must file a new tariff
with the commission thirty days before
il becomes effective, the Erie's tariff
will be filed January 10.
The tariffs of the other roads cannot
be prepared inside of week, and un-
less special dispensation is given by
the commission the Erie will have that
much advantage.
While the Erie officials are silent as
to how much of a cut will be made. the
impression prevails that the new rates
between Chicago and New York will be
a. I =
The present rates are $18 and $40 re-
spectively, but the latter represents a
cut of Sc made on the second-class rate
in November
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
MONEY AND EXCHANGE.

Call money in New York. 6@10 per cent.
New York Clearing House statement: Ex-
changes, 1851. 25S; balance, $685. "A; sub
treasury debtor for s1,337 The New York
sub-treasurv has gained since last Friday
S6S7, COO from the banks.
Commercial bar silver in New York. So
cents; Mexican dollars. "A cents; bar silver
in London ,25 13-16d.; bar gold. rs. sssd- ;
eagles. 76s. 41hd.; premium OH gold at
Madrid 1S.40; at Lisbon, SIS.
Paris rentes, s5 francs, SO centimes. Par:s
private rate of discount. 4d41s per cent;
exchange on London, 2b francs Il centimes;
Berlin private rate of discount. 5s4 per
cent; exchange on London, 20 marks o0l9
pigs
Money on call in London, 4d4A per cent
Rate OF discount for both short and three
months bills. per cent. Consos for
money SO 13-l6d. for account, 4Ad.
Foreign exchange market held an easier
tone. Demand sterling was quoted 4So55D
4s57O cables, 4s6l40 4S640; sixty-day bills,
4S1@4 S110; short francs, 5.lSls, and short
rechmarks, 94%.
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
THE PRODUCE MARKET.

NEW YORK Jan -Flour-Receipts,
90 740 sales. 1900; firm. but quiet.
Wheat-Receipts, 10000; sales, 100000 in
sympathy with weak cables; wheat opened
lower today. but later rallied on bull sup
port and an absence of short selling. May,
i125sG114N July, 1O69s6l1O7h.
Rye-Flr n; No. Western, 81 f. o. b.
New York.
Corn-Receipts. "a, 400: sales none
Beef-Steady.
Professionally
Lard-Easy; Western prime. SO5dS.15..
Sugar-Raw. firm: fair refining. 342:
centrifugal 96 fest. 392; molasses sugar.
3.17; refined, steady crushed $50;
powdered, 500. granulated, 400.
Petroleunl-Steady; refined. all ports,
S.701S.75
Coffee-Quiet; No, Rio, 6 1-16; No. 4
Santos. 8.
Molasses-steady: New Orleans. S46D42.
Butter-Firm; receipts 4.363. creamery
specials. 80; extras. 2sd291z; thirds to first.
21M2S; held. second to special. 22u2S; State
dairy common to finest, 19n2S process
common TO special. 15d23; Western factory
common to first, 15d19h; imitation cream
cry first, 206i21
Cheese-Steady: receipts, 719; State, full
cream. small colored and white, fine, 1854 !;
do. large, colored. fine, 15s4; do, whIte.
l5lh do, good to prime, 141s115; do, late
made best, 11S4d12; do, common to far,
J1sG111h; skins, 1G11.
Eggs--Firm; receipts 5.S25: State, Perm
sylvania and nearby fancy, selected.
white, 3663S; good to choice, 3Od35; brown
end mixed fancy, 3N131; first, 2sGk9; West
ern firsts 2S seconds, 26@27
Poultry--Dressed firmer, Western chick
ems. 1920 turkeys. 1el717: fowls. 9n1S
The evening star and Newark advertiser., 1908-01-06
NATIONS BEST TIMES
NEAR, SAYS D0LLIVER.
Iowa Senator Deplores Apparent Lack
of Confidence in Country's
Institutions.

NEW YORK, Jan 6.-United States
Senator J. P. Dolliver, of Iowa, delivered
an address on "The New Moral Out
look" yesterday before a large meeting
in the Orpheum Theatre, Brooklyn, held
under the auspices of the central
branch of the Y. M. G. A.
He deplored the fact that the people
of the United States were losing conf
dence in our institutions and declared
there was absolutely no need of lack CT
faith in the progress the country Is
making.
There was a ring Of optimism in every
utterance, and he concluded by saying
that the brightest time in the history
of the nation would soon be at hand,