The Washington herald., 1908-07-07
TWO FRAIL BOOMLETS
BEYOND MEDICAL AID
SkiLful Political DiagnoStician Finds Artificial
Respiration and ShmuLantS VaiHly Tried
on johnson and GRAY Near-cOrpSeS.

I person narned Brown, mayor OF Lincoln,
has coucei ed In his inside pocket tho
/ platform Nj Bryaq's convention viii
adopt at the request OF Mr.. Bryan. Mr..
/ Brown Is, or is not, here. That is a
matter OF no consequence. At the prop
CT moment he viii unite the string around
/ his package Of issues and hand the con-
/ tents 90 the chairman of the resolutions
committee. After that there will be moth
| ing 20 do but write this simple sentence:
Your committee has the honor unani-
m0usly 20 report the following resolu-
! tions, and walk over 70 the convention
/ hail
The Industrious Mr. Bryan has provided
for every contingency in his platform. He
I has various planks on vital subjects,
worded In various ways. Tie VIII leave IL
| TO the committee 10 select any particular
| bits of verbiage II chooses, merely ad-
mOnishing the members that they must
select from the Bryan gems Of thought
and not do any thinking themselves. lie
/ has no objection 10 talk
Let TnIkfest End.
/ He rather expects the resolutions COM
mittee will remain up all night, yipping
and yapplng about what shall be said
and what shall not be said. but when
nature has taken It's course. when all the
/ language has been spilled, he expects
/ the pauachy Mr. Brown. mayor Of Lin
/ coin, TO rise modestly In his place and
remark:
Now that we have had full and free
/ discussion, I have the honor 20 present
10 YOU herewith the resolutions you Will
adopt"
Nor need there be any fear that those
resolutions will be incendiary
Mr.. Bryan is not writing burning words
as he was wont 10 do. Somebody has
turned a fire extinguisher on his blazing
vocabulary. His language will be calm
/ discreet, and subject TO as many readings
as may be necessary. Mr.. Bryan strives
TO please.
And, speaking about platforms, Judge
Alton Il. Parker was greatly compli-
mented to-day by the New York dele
cation He was selected as the New
York member Of the committee on reso-
lutions and was directed to get there
and seek 20 embody New York's ideas
in the resolutions. Still In order that
he might not become fatigued or be
forced 10 miss the many ovatious that
greet him, a subcommittee was appointed
TO help him. II would never do TO hav,
the judge working all the time. fever
ishly striving 10 get into words the great
conservative thoughts that are teeming ir
his brain
Therefore. few handy patriots lik,
! Cohalan and Littleton and the like. vii
always be ready to fix II up for tn,
judge to help him out. TO assist him
! In fact, II is the opinion OF the commit
tee that all the Judge need do is 10 rep
resent. These willing little workers OF
the subcommittee will relieve him of tn,
labor. Could anything be more consid
crate?
Alfalfa Bill still Talking.
AT o'clock tonight Alfalfa Bill Mur
ray started on his 233d speech in tn,
lobby Of the Brown Palace Hotel. All
falfa Birs mission is to explain the con
stitution of Oklahoma, a comprehensive,
document that contains all Legislation
needed for setting up a new State from
the classification of the voters 10 tn
length OF sheets that shall be used ol
hotel beds
Alfalfa Bill has a liberal Interpretation
for each paragraph. and If he talk
steadily. as he probably will, it is ex
pected he will be through by next Sun
day afternoon at o'clock.
He is accompanied by 200 orators fron
Oklahoma. each with an explanation o
the constitution. The result Is that tn
day has been noisy. and Oklahoma ha
furnished most Of the noise
Meantime. the long arm Of Bryal
reached across several times during tn
day. He patted some of the patriots OF
the head. and he took others by tn
throat, but whatever way done Il wa
always the long arm Of Bryan that did II