Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1908-11-25

i grown before.
Look at that
mop, viii you?" he exclaimed in
joyous triumph, as he removed his
hat and ran his shapely fingers
through his silky locks. Just look
at that! Why, 1 was as bald as a
marble comfortable year ago!"
And Jones bought a bottle of the
wonderful hair tonic and carefully
toted it home with him. Being SEN
sitive on the subject, he surreptitious-
~ slipped it into the desk of his den
and forgot it.
He had almost doZed into the land
of dreams, when he remembered that
he had failed to make the first aprli-
cation Of the wonderful tonic. Slip
ping carefully out of bed and stealing
cautiously down the stairs, he reach ed
the den without falling over chair
or humping his shins against the
piano. Reaching into the desk, he
drew the bottle out and cautiougly
pulling the cork, applied the liql id
generously to his scalp. Then he
rubbed it in faithfully and crept care
fully back to bed through the dark
ness.
",,'or heavens sake!" screeched
Mrs. Jones next morning, what is
the matter with you, George?"
Then she began to laugh hyster-
ically
Jones sat up in bed and grunted.
Your head! What have you been
putting on your head?"
"Oh. that's all right" mumbled
Jones, making believe he was about
to go to sleep again
Get up, George! Gracious good
ness, get up! Your head is all-oh,
mercy! did you ever see anything so
funny"
Jones got up then, sheepishly,
and locked in the glass. Hor-
rors, lie had got hold of the
wrong bottle in the dark and
given his scalp thorough dyeing with
light green ink, intended for his foun-
tain pen!
He has quit buying hair tonic now
and is resigned and happier man.
BY the Wayside.
have noticed that the quiet man
who doesn't blow much, usually has
balance at the bank.
z Z Z
II a fellow We're happy all the time,
don't you think he would crave just
little aloe in his cup?
z 4 x
diplomat is man who can meet
the girl he Tilted ten years before and
make her think he is a fine fellow
still
Election nowadays settles one thing
and that is that there will be re-
count and lawsuit just as soon as
the results are announced.
Z z y
In order to tell from the company
he keeps, what kind of a man a fell
low is, it is quite necessary to know
something about the company.
Il Z Z
A girl is the most exasperating of
creatures. If you kiss her, she squeals,
and her father comes in to see about
it. If you don't kiss her, how are you
gcIng to tell whether she wants to be
kissed or not?
900
Yes, You Will
When all the world is old, lad.
And all the hills are brown,
When all the days are cold, lad,
And all the leaves are down,
l Then you will sit and sigh, lad,
For chances thrown away
And the appetite for pie, lad,
| That you possess today.
| -S.E Kiser.
! 600
Hoppertown Happenings.
| Elmer Sphinx expects to accept lucra-
l tive position as pitcher with the Tigers
/ next season if he can get it. Hank
| Tumms has stole Constable Ezra Hands
| star to patch up hole in his tin roof
/ with. When Ezra wants to arrest any
body now he has to drag 'em around to
| Hanks house and UP ladder and point
| TO the star.
It has been so hot and dry lately that
| Old Cap Whipple's bald head got all
| cracked and wrinkled in the scalp. Old
l Cap says the rain yesterday was quite
welcome as he was getting some hot
headed.-Roy K Moulton,
| w. ss.sz