Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1908-05-19
Topics of the Times

One day small Edna's grandmother
showed her large, old-fashioned
cent.
Grandma" She sai1. afsor sizing 1t
up, 'if they had such big cents when
you was girl, the dollars must have
been whoppers.'
A New York mother claims to raise
babies by vibration. Most babies raise
their mothers by their nocturnal vi
brations.
A Chicago paper remarks the I'M
swervIng yalor of q man who Jour-
neyed thirteen miles in Windy City
street cars to be welded 1t was a
tough experience, but he was cleaner
than If he had walked the Chicago
streets for like distance.
A Pittsburger named Mckee has
just been divorced in Paris. They are
so busy in Pittsburg courts that some
of the natives have to go away to get
matters attended to.
ess
The Harvard stoop is not always
caused by heaviness of learning.
Edward Box, the $1,000 a year edi-
tor of the Ladies Home Journal, says
it's great to be poor. The poor say
it's great to be rich, 50 we thus strike
balance.
A Seattle wrestler named Roller
turned his opponent, Fred Beell, twice.
Yet some people say there's nothing in
name.
The man W no has knocked about
knows, full well why 1t is called the
buffet lunch.
If the noise of the motor cycles
could be saved until July 4, they
would make quite respectable Fourth
of July celebration.
No matter how confident other dem
ocratic candidates may be, the Day is
Johnson's.
Henry, dear. tried on suit Of
your clothes the other day and it fit
ted me to perfection"
May I ask your object in taking
such a liberty with my garments? ?"
why. Belle Green said she heard
Tommy Tolliver say that you wasn't
much bigger than shrimp-and l
was just wondering how big a shrimp
Is"
Rudyard Kpling deplores the class
of writing in the modern newspaper.
Whatever It's faults, the public does
not often need Jimmy and a crow
bar to pry loose its meaning, which
same cannot always be said of the au-
thor Of 1.-THE Light That Failed"
q Criminals must. be privileged class
in Pittsburg. A message says a bank
er charged with theft has consented"
to appear before court.
1t never rains but 1t pours. One Of
the Brownsville soldiers who lost his
place in the army entered an action for
damages. Now he has lost his suit.
DR.. Wiley, the nations food expert,
wants some students for alcohol ex-
periments. Isn't it time for the w. c..
T. U. to speak up?
The Show Printers association will
no longer picture girls in tights on
posters, which signals the end Of a
loose practice.
If there had been more food for
gossip. that Grundy Center paper
might not have had to give UP the
ghost.
Bryan has had his picture taken
while sitting between Andrew Carnegie
and j. j. Hill, which is being a COM
moner with a vengeance, and goes to
show that he would like the Scotch
and Irish suffrage.
w IlSIllcl Mis- SIullLcSS yhWUVuS Weto
found or not, her chek is admitted.
The Atlanta Journal speaks of the
limited water supply of that city. Does
this mean fire water?
It is now announced from Washing
ton that the third term bugaboo has
been worked successfully to scare the
interests into limo for Taft on the
choice between two evils. Readers OF
the T.-R. will remember that almost
year ago, when most statesmen were
declaring for third term for Roose-
yelt this newspaper predicted that the
danger Of third term was being used
to whip the enemies of Roosevelt into
line for Taft
Julian Richards reports that let
ter has been received from Congress
man Cousins saying that it will be inn
possible for him to come to Iowa to
take part in the campaign, but he "as-
sails Cummins and supports Allison
BY the way, have we got a single
lawyer 80 years oldNrunning for coun-
ty attorney in Iowa? Is the job more
arduous than that of United States
senator? How many Of us would vote
for an octogenarian for county attor-
ney2