Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1908-05-14

Copyright. by Joseph B. BowlesD
The politician who is following the
calling for a livelihood eats, drinks
and sleeps politics. You cannot get
him off the track. He finds little in
terest in anything else. All his read
ing, outside of the papers, is on po-
litical topics. He keeps track of past
elections and past ward votes, knows
how his ward has gone, will go, and
ought to go in the future He is the
life of all political assemblages, for
he has the air of the expert arNl the
glibness of an illustrated lecturer"
He attends the wakes funerals,
dances, parties, baseball and football
games, christenings, church fairs, pic
mics and all other social happenings,
and gets himself voted the most pop
ular man" whenever he has a chance
jamboree there was a beauty show"
and | was appointed one of the judges.
The other two judges were pulling
together" and l saw l was double
crossed before the beauties" went
ON the platform In front of the plat
form there was a big crowd on the
chairs, and they were filed by the re-
spectiVe adherents of the contesting
fair" / had innocently supposed
that things were ION the square" until
j was approached by one of the judges
with the idea that the first prize ought
to go to a certain girl who, to my no.
ton, was not within a thousand miles
OF being first in the race. / put up
such fierce kick that the other
judges got little bit uncertain, and
at last, as first and second prizes were
both gold watches, they agreed to let
me select No. 2 if | would vote for
their choice for first prize.
When No. Is name was announced
a groan went up from the crowd, &C.
Companied by a cheer from one cor
ner of the seats where the winners
p&rtisans were punched. When No.
rs name was given she was cheered
by big majority of the crowd, and
was satisfied my eyesight was still
good. Now for both of these girls the
vote had been solid, three votes for
each. When it came to No. sand
there were only three prizes worth
Snything-I did little "double-cross-
ing" myself. One of the judges pro-
posed a girl who had a face like a
custard pie at twilight. The other
Judge said, Sure, that's the one!" l
had selected a girl for this pSize and
had got her name, so l said to judge
No. 2, where's your LADY," He
pointed to her and l said, out of
sight; but we'd better split the votes
this time; you vote for Miss -" CIV
ing him the name of my chosce-"so
that the crowd won't have any boiler
coming on the split; two votes to one
will win out anyway"
He did as suggested, but as l also
voted for my choice the look of dis
gust that overspread his features
when he saw how he had been horn
swoggled" was something classic. But
all he said was Holy gee!"
After a man has been mixed up in
politics for year or so he begins to
perceive that politics has as many an
giles in a social way as the game Of
"three-cushion caroms." Th9 variety
of gradations is so widely diversified
and the intervals so abrupt that il
takes truly cosmopolitan spirit u
successfully take the degrees" A
four o'clock in the afternoon you may
lie touching glasses with young me
chaplc at a ''rathskeller" in a friendly
chat over your beer as to how things
look in his end of the ward. At p
M. you may be dining with bunch o
judges and party magnates In soc
fashionable club making wild guesse
with the rest of them as to how ma
tional politics looms up. At twelv
that night you may be addressing fol
~ or fifty people in little hall bacl
OF some saloon. You must be pre-
pared TO meet all kinds of people at
minutes nc$ice. and you must be abb
90 understand them and adapt YOU
self 10 ,hem instantly and easily, O
ynY van be lost in political society.
Suppose you happen to drop in q
downtown headquarters where the
are waiting for a meeting o be calleC
There may be twenty to thirty me
about, some sitting in chairs readin