davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wahpeton times. [volume] (Wahpeton, Richland County, Dakota [N.D.]) 1879-1919, 1908-12-24
AN ARTIST IN
ARTICULATION.

has for some time been print
ing character sketches of
Members of Congress and
others who have, by hook or
crook, managed to get them.
selves into the public eye
The last issue of the Post con-
tains the following sketch of
our ownest own, Porter Jamse
McCumber. Those of US who
have known Porter James
from away back, will have no
difficulty in recognizing the
picture.
He had been eight years up
on a project for extracting sun
beans out of cucumbers," says
Dear Old Dean Swift. That's
a way we regular authors have
Dear Old Dean Swift-denotes
a familiarity, an acquaintance,
so to speak-fixes it with the
reader that we are intimate
with the Dean-know him per
fectly-friend of his always
makes a hit-for it is only our
cagiest readers who say any
thing about the Dear Old Dean
that is perquisite of author
ing. Dear Old Dean Swift
Beloved Billiam Morris-Al-
fred, the Master-you know
sounds bully.
But, as the Dear Old Dean
said: "He had been eight
years on a project for extract
ing sunbeams out of cucum-
bers," the plot being to can the
sunbeams and let trem out on
gloomy days. OF course, that
was satire or sarcasm, or some
thing. They arn't any sun
beams in cucumbers, 20 u
know, positively not. There
isn't even a moonbeam in item.
Nothing but stomachaches. 1t
was this way: the Dear Old
Dean was looking around to
find something that was as
sunbeamless as a kippered her
ring, and he struck on cucum-
bers. Good idea, too.
Still, there is cause for few
fleeting regrets that the Dear
Old Dean didn't live nowadays,
for, if he did, he would have
written it thus: "He has been
eight years on a project for ex.
tracing sunbeams out of Nc,
Cumbers," which, h e Nc
Cumber-has any cucumber
that was ever picked or picked
beaten to a whisper when it
comes to lack of sunbeams, or
any other kind of beams, in
cluding those we have eminent
authority for stating some
times get in your own eye.
A McCumber, as you will
readily appreciate, is different
from cucumber, radically diff
ferent, A n d why, Brother
Bones, is a McCumber radish.
ly-no-r a d i c ally-different
different from a cucumber:
Because the most elaborate
practice of. the arts and sci.
ences of transmutation will
make nothing but dill pickle
out of a cucumber, while they
did once make United States
Senator out of a McCumber.
(Lawfter.)
Now, that's a fact. Out
there in North Dakota, with
the fewest and most trivial for.
malities. they made Senator
out of a McCum ber-Porter
James McCumber, and he's a
Senator yet, by heck, and who
will say him nay? Not a Sin.
gle, solitary soul if Porter ],
gets to it first. The person
does not live who can say him
nay-nor anything else-fo o T
Porter James will say it him.
self, say that and anything else
The Wahpeton times. [volume] (Wahpeton, Richland County, Dakota [N.D.]) 1879-1919, 1908-12-24
NURENBERGER
CASE DROPPED

1t is said that the govern
ment has decided to drop the
case against Frederick Nuren-
berg the former Richland
county farmer who was charg-
ed with defraudlng the United
States government.
He was an old soldier who
was former resident of Ohio
and he went back to Ohio and
induced lot of his old friends
there, both women and men,
many Of the latter being old
soldiers like himself, to come
out to Ward county and take
up homesteads.
1t was the contention of the
government that Nurenberger
made contract with these
people whereby he was to pay
their filing fees and then he
was to get a deed for their land
at a certain price after they
proved up.
Nurenberger was tried on
this charge about three years
ago, was convicted and sentenc-
ed to serve a term in prison
and to pay a heavy fine. A
stay of judgment and a new
trial was granted and now the
government is said to have
decided to drop further pro-
secution of the cases.
FOR SALE-Two dwelling
houses on the corner of 9Th
street and Delaware avenue
for particulars inquire at Ink &
Wallace's Law office or w. A.
Baker.
have some private money
for few farm loans.
A. Aspinwall.
For farm loan, see B. F
Schneider. Rates the lowest
If 40.
The Wahpeton times. [volume] (Wahpeton, Richland County, Dakota [N.D.]) 1879-1919, 1908-12-24

To the man bowling the
highest score at Kline's bowl
ing alley will receive a box of
cigars. Prizes will be given
every two weeks. Come and
enjoy yourself. Ed. J. Kline.
The Wahpeton times. [volume] (Wahpeton, Richland County, Dakota [N.D.]) 1879-1919, 1908-12-24
COMMISSIONERS
PROCEEDINGS,

-s.es~eVO
PROCEEDINGS.
Wahpeton, N. d. Dec. 10Th. 'Os.
Board of County Commis-
sioners met in special session,
all members present and called
to order by Chairman Ness.
Minutes of last meeting were
read and on motion approved.
On motion the application of
Wenzel Parezek for an abate-
ment is referred to the Town
ship Board of Dexter.
On motion refundment of
$3.50 was made to Albert Skau.
ge for road poll on account of
him being a Fireman and ex-
empt.
On motion a refundment is
made to ]. L. Mathews for Tax
Certificate No 367, sale of 1904
taxes and subsequent.
John Zentgraf turned over to
the County Treasurer a note for
$500 signed by John Radke,
this note was given for money
advanced to him by the Coun.
ty for Hospital expense.
w. p. Cairncross turned into
the County Treasury $1,000 re.
ceived from the sale of a stove.
On motion Connolly Bros.
contract was accepted and the
Auditor is authorized to draw
a warrant in full of Contract.
On motion the Bond of Coun-
ty Treasurer is increased from
$4,000 to $1OOOOO.OO and the
Northern Trust Co. is request
ed to write the Bonds for that
amount.
RESOLUTION.
That to our out going Com
missioner Donald Wright, we
express our regrets that he is
soon to pass out OF his official
position and extend to him our
kindest wishes for his future
and that we feel that his alb
sence from our official body
will deprive us of the COM
panionship of a genial and true
friend, and that the taxpayers
of the County will lose an
able and faithful servant.
(Signed) c. Ness, VIM. Green,
P. E. Sletmoe, John J. Zentgraf
E. S. Cameron.
On Motion the following
bills were allowed and paid out
of their respective funds.
Wahpeton P. O. postage Co.
OnnCeS. ....................$ 81 36
Peter Steffas, Hall Rent. 500
Sam Christenson, To apply
on Contract ct................ 1913 GU
f. D. Knots, Printing ...... As 90
w. P. Cairncross salary and
money advanced. ........ 112 90
Connolly Bros. to apply on
Contract. 900 m
Wahpeton p. o. Postage. 122 c2
c. M. Mckay, Freight. 185 70
C. Ness, money adv. for poor 9.1O
Globe Gazette, printing.... 2l2.95
Hankinson News, printing. l02.50
st. Francis Hospital SER
vices for poor IS 90
Great Western Tel. Co. ser. l 9O
North Western Tel. ex. Co. ser. Is 70
Geo. H. Wichman mdse p. F. 16 90
S.H. Snyder light C. H.B.... 55 90
Wahpeton Iron Works booths 1877 50
Stephen Braun taxes. ... 69 o.
VIM. Green bridge work ...... 10 80
C. Ness comm. cal and etc.. 81 GO
p. II. Sletmoe com sal and etc 18 20
p. E. Sletmoe bridgework.. II 90
John ]. Zentgraf com sal, etc. Is 81
John j. Zentgraf bridge work 4 81
VIM. Green com sal & etc. 80. 3S &c
Donald Wright com sal, etc. 20 O(
Donald Wright stallion SER. 40 O(
r. V. McMikel blacksmithing 8 81
H. 6. Rasmussen con fees j.c. 10 sc
f. s Cameron money adv G u
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
SUMMER SCHOOL
Twelve weeks; Beginning June llth,
1908

The work done atthe summer school
will be the same as that done during
the regular term of the Normal School
except that it has been modified so as
to accommodate the students that find ii
possible to attend only six weeks in.
stead of the full term. Double work
is done in all the common branches
as we'll as in the subjects required foI
a first grade certificate, so that credits
can be secured the first or second half
of the summer school, which can be
used towards securing state teachers
certificate. Ifthereis asufficient demand
for review subjects, provision will be
made for such. Circulars giving more
detailed information can be secured
by writing to the County Superin.
tendent or to w. A. Shoemaker,
Pres. of the State Normal School.
52-2t
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
GETTY GROVE

r. Gritzmacher made business
trip to Melrose Saturday.
Miss Katie Ripka returned to hel
home Monday.
Miss Earnstina Werhan spent Sun
day with her parents in North Ashley
Miss Clara Leitz spent the past week
with Emma Gritzmacher.
Miss Rosela Weiser spent Saturday
and Sunday with her parents in Mel
rose.
Mr.. and Mrs. Mike Fritz left las
week for St. Louis where they intenC
to spend some time visiting friends
and relatives.
Miss Annie Kind returned from
Wadena last week. She intends to
spend the summer with her parents
Mr.. and Mrs. George Kind.
Pete Young and sisters Louise, anc
Josephine. Willie Gritzmacher, anC
sister Emma, Gust Quade, Lou Kind
Frank mode. Earnstina Werhan ane
Clara Leitz, attended the dance giver
at the home of Mr.. Werhans Friday
evening.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28

Louis Anderson transacted business
at Eagle Bend three days last week.
H.J Wagner was in Osakis Friday
evening.
H. J. Bentfeld and j. Frahler went
to Long Prairie on business Friday.
Mrs. H. ]. Wagner and Mrs. Hugh
Owen were at Osakis Saturday.
]. G.. Radermacher went to Long
Prairie on business Monday returning
Thursday.
Miss Collins of Sauk Centre visited
with friends IN this vicinity last week
and left for home Saturday.
A. Edmann of Alexandria was called
to the bedside of his daughter Mrs.
G. Gucenbkurg who is very sick.
County Superintendent of Schools
Bertha Roddis visited the village
school Thursday.
]. G. Perkison is nursing a case OF
blood poison on the thumb of his lett
hand caused by the pricking of a
curtain stretcher wire.
Mrs. ]. B. HUM left on the early
Monday morning train for Goodhue,
MINI. to be present at the wedding of
her brother.
Phil Flint, who had the bone OF his
leg fractured by horse stepping on
it last week, has so far recovered as to
be able to 20 around the house on
crutches.
There will be a school entertain
ment here June 1st at the village ball
given by home talent which promises
to be somthing good. 1t is for the
school library.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
WEST PORT r. X. NO. l

Born, to Mr.. and Mrs. w. Barnette
Friday, May Is, a son.
G. r. Bruce was a Sauk Centre call
er Saturday.
Mrs. Pete Steffes was a Westport
caller Saturday.
Mrs. ]. F. Mcdonald and son Ber.
nard were Sauk Centre callers Satur-
day.
Mrs. M. D. Trattles, Mrs. L. E.
Trattles and Mrs. Dunn were in this
vicinity Saturday.
Jimmie Hyland and Ed. Sponner
went to Sauk Centre Sunday morning
and returned Sunday evening.
A ball game between Westport and
Willard was played at Westport Satur-
day the score being II to IL in favor of
Westport.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
McCORMIC LAKE

Mrs. G.. D. Wilcox visited at John
Loyd's Friday.
Bruce Elliott went to Long Prairie
Wednesday to work in a creamery.
Mrs. Wirth OF Long Prairie visited
D. G. Wolfe's Saturday and Sunday.
Mr.. Pendergast was out to his farm
last Saturday.
Frank Dickerson was looking after
his farming interests last Saturday.
A party of men working for the
telephone company took dinner at Mr..
Elliott's one day last week.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
SOUTH SAUK CENTRE

Henry w. Botz and son Leopold
drove to Spaulding Friday.
Mr.. Yager transacted business at
Melrose Saturday.
Mrs. Tony Miller visited friends in
Sauk Centre Saturday.
Miss Susan Minette has returned
from Westport after spending few
weeks.
Louie Kind, who has been working
in Sauk Centre the past week, spen
Sunday with his brother Henry Kind
Master Simon Botz and sister Verna
spent Saturday with the Yager child
rem.
John Gritzmacher spent Sunday
with Frank La Rock of Pleas ant
Valley.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
NORTH ASHLEY

Ben Doege called on Jos. Wiess Jr.
Thursday evening.
Mrs. Chris Guckenburg is very
sick.
Barney Uphus is giving his house
and barn new coat of paint. ~
Henry Deters' wife presented him a
baby boy Tuesday.
Barney Uphus made a business trip
to Sauk Centre Friday morning.
George Gray Of South Ashley called
at the F. A. Doege home Saturday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Riley Ward will soon
move their stock and household goods
to Swanville where they will live dur
ing the summer.
Quite q number from here attended
the dance given at the home of A.
Werhan in South Ashley Friday even.
ing.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Fiaht to Death in Midair.

A bird was seen to fall in the yard
OF the works department at Deal bar
racks, London. recently. 1t was a
blue rock pigeon, with an adder tight
ly coiled around It, and both were
dead. The adder, which measured two
feet six inches, was twisted around
the pigeons neck and one wing, and
the pigeons peak tightly gripped the
snakes head.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
SOUTH ASHLEY

Miss Anna Laughnan, who was
qlite i'll, is convalescent.
Miss Agnice Laughnan was a Sauk
Centre caller Friday.
Mrs. Mer6eld and son Mat were
Sauk Centre callers Saturday.
Mrs. Geo. Rosenow and son Willie
were in Sauk Centre Friday.
Mrs. Merfield in company with Mrs.
Eckonrod of Sauk Cuetre attended the
school picnic north of town Thursday
The dance given at the home oil
August Werhahn Friday evening was
well attended about seventy couple be-
ing present good time is reported by
all.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Incorriqible.

In a certain school of Washington
there was one lad who would persist
in saying have went"
One day the teacher kept him in"
saying:
while 1 am out of the room you
may write have gone fifty tines
When the pedagogue returned he
found that the boy had dutifully per-
formed the task, having written have
gone' fifty times. On the other side
of the paper, however, was this mes
sage from the absent one:
81 have went.
"John White"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
PLEASANT VALLEY

Miss Bea Graham and Mrs. John
Allen were Melrose callers Friday.
Art Graham of Melrose called on his
brother Sam, Saturday.
John Graham is spending few days
in Melrose.
Miss Agnes Kinsella spent Sunday
with her parents.
Stephen Allen was Sauk Centre
caller Saturday.
Frank La Rock went to Belgrade
Monday.
A number of Pleasant Vallyites
attended the dance at Werhahn's Fri
day evening.
Anna Lietz returned to her home
Monday after spending few weeks
with Mrs. Allen.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Self Interest.

The real estate firm of Solomon e.
O'Sullivan had lots for sale in a new
suburban addition. O'SullivaS-yOung,
enthusiastic and Irish-was writing
the advertisement, the national elO-
uuence flowing from his pen. He
urged impending purchasers to seize
the passing moment.
Napoleon not only met Opportu-
nifty; he created it,"
Mr.. Solomon read this line in the
advertisement slowl yand carefully.
'This fellow Napoleon, he said
whats the use of advertising him
with our money!"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Alcohol Producing Plant.

Experiments being made with cas-
sava under the direction of the United
States department of agriculture show
it to lie one of the best alcohol pro-
ducing plants, a ton of the root stock
yielding thirty-five gallons of alcohol
The plant is easily and cheaply
grown, and the yield is very large, soil
of average quality yielding ten tons
to the acre. At from 35 to 40 cents
a gallon the gross profit would there
fore be from $35 to $40 an acre. This
profit is greater than that derived
from the alcohol potato raised SO
abundantly in Germany and Russia.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Method in 1t.

For goodness sake! look at Cad
ley He just got up and actually
gave that old lady his seat. never
saw him do that in car before"
Hes changed his ways recently.
showed him an article in the paper
the other day about an old woman
who left 100000 to young man who
was polite to her ir a street car"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
A Christening in SIGHT.

A Mobile lawyer was surprised when
his negro gardener called at the Of
fee accompanied by large wheel
barrow.
Morse Robinson" he said, 81 wants
to know eff you'd mind lendin' me
some of yo' cyclopediars an diction-
aries an any other big books, sah."
upon my souls" exclaimed the as
tonished lawyer. What on earth are
you up to-"
VERY important occasion, Marse
Robinson. Very important occasion,
deed. She5a an me wants to hunt
up a name foh de baby"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Valued Same as Gold.

B. G. Stewart, merchant OF Ceder
View, Miss, says:"I tell my customers
when they buy box Of DR.. Kings
New Life Pills they get the worth of
that much gold in weight, if afflicted
constipation, malaria or billiousness."
Sold under guarantee at Hanson &
Emerson's drug store. 25c.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
More Gold In China.

The Muho and Kuanying Shan gold
mines in Heiiungkiang, ChiEa, which
have been restored to China by Rus
sia ON the repayment of the expenses
incurred by the latter during the last
several years are said to be still very
rich, and may be again made prosper
Gus if sufficient funds are put into
the working of them.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Wasn't Asking Much.

A florist of Philadelphia was one
day making the rounds of his prop
critics near that city when he was ap-
preached by young man, who ap-
piled to him for work.
81 am sorry" said the florist, "but I
have all the help l needI have moth
ing for you to do"
"Sir," said the young man, with a
polite bow, "if you only knew how
very little work it would take to Oc-
cupy mel"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
The Newest Device.

Gail of the boards have been tori
from your fence, sir"
Whats left?"
"The posts and one rail all round
Every we'll"
Shall we mend it?"
Certainly not. It's all the go now.
Whats all the go?'
why, don't you see-I have a mo
norai] fenre"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28

REAL ESTATE TRANSFERS.
Frank Theis to Frank Roth
stein, s12 of nA of neA,
sec IL, Eden Lake ...... S 9S5 90
H. j. Loraas to Jennie Park
er lot s, blk 2, and other,
M. & DIS add to Sauk
Centre ................ 1926 90
Chas. Reichensperger to w.
J. Mugg, part of s1a nwA
and other, sec ......... 500 W
H. landau to A. Lindgren,
lot 2 and other, sec sc, st.
Joseph .............. 5000 90
V. Miller to F. Fienhage,
swA swA and other, sec
II, Muntan ............ 1900 w
Geo. Klein, ar., to VIM. Sim
ons, swA seA and other,
sec %, Collegeville ...... 1850 OO
Joseph Rose to Herm. Rose,
part seA nwA and other,
sec 5, Oak .............. 5SoO w
Theo. Bomberg to F. En-
derle, ny nwA and other,
sec 35, North Fork ...... 29OO 90
A. Finhart to Racine State
Bank WIZ nwA sec 81,
Lake George ......... 1900 90
Z. Collum to Emil Peterson,
lot IL, blk So, st. Cloud :. 900 90
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Hersditary.

Guardian Tow does my niece get
on vi. cT :. sic-is she making any
progress?"
is not Eer time and lingering are
very defective. and all l can do to
correct them makes no impression on
her. She will run the scales to suit
herself
Guardisn-"She inherited that from
from her father He was twenty years
in the coal busine S."
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Up AGAINST lt.

Diogenes uttered a horrid impreca.
ton.
Yet, the philosopher was not great
ly to be blamed.
He had been out all morning with
his lantern looking for all honest man,
stolen his tub.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Great Doll Collection.

Princess Clementine of Belgium,
youngest daughter of Leopold, is cred.
tied with having the most wonderful
collection of dolls in the world.
Among them are specimens from
Babylon, bone dolls from Greenland,
wooden one from Peru, a paper doll
from India, Greek dolls with ward.
robes, even dolls houses, with furni.
ture and dishes in them.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
CORRESPONDENCE
ROUTE No. 6
NJ. w. Richards is seriously i'll.

VI. w. hlcnarOS is seriously Ill.
Godtfred Anderson spent Sunday at
Nels Anderson's.
Roy Parks delivered stock to Sauk
Centre Monday.
Nels Anderson and nephew Ernest
Anderson left on Saturday for Benson,
MInn. to spend a few days.
Miss Mabel and Sunday with hel
grandparents Mr.. and Mrs. w. M.
Richards.
Miss Sigrid Anderson spent Tues.
day evening of last week at Sauk Cen.
tre with the Misses Edna and Jessie
Trattles.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Only Too WiIIinq.

Seedy Party Excuse me, sir, but
can you help me out little this morn
ing?
Mr.. Busyman-Certainly You may
have your choice of being thrown out
or kicked out.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Bad Advice,

"Dr. Wiley advises sleep the sleep
of innocence"
"Well, baby is usually called an
innocent, and if l didn't sleep more
than the average baby I'd have brain
storm"
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
PossibIx a Car Shortage,

A consul at Trebizond writes that
recently it took eight months for
some stylographic pens to come by
express from America to port on
the Black sea.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28

VIM. Sanster, Tony Bentfield, Ben
Doege, s. D. Butler, Roy Jardine, G.
Carpenter, Walter Barnett and Chas.
Bruce were Ssuk Centre callers Satur-
day.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
At the Dinner Table,

At the Dinner Table.
Guest-Why does Huber never say
anything?
Neighbor-Because his wife always
declares that two people should not
speak at once.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Sure Sign.

Sure Sign.
Hayrix-They dew say es heow the
new trackshun company air powerful
wealthy.
Oatcake-I reckon that's er fact
Jes look at tn big taxes they don't
pay!
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28

When 1t Becomes Personal Loss.
George, the cook has go12"
Let her go. l never liked her"
But she took all my current jel'y
and both my best table cloths"
''Oh, let her co.
And she carried off the recipe for
waff1es you like so we'll"
Whats that! Which way d:l shc
go? Why didn't you call the police
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
Out Of the Ordinary.

OUt OF CHc OTUINETy.
Goodley-He always seems to be
= very earnest at any rate.
Knox-Oh, very. Why, he can say
How are you?" and give you the IN
preston that he really wants to
know.
The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-05-28
WEST UNION

Louis Anderson transacted business
at Eagle Bend three days last week.
H. ]. Wagner was in Osakis Friday
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1908-12-30

just yet. However any who want to
donate such viii kindly ring up Mr..
Cheatham, Phone 1877, or this office, and
his donation will be properly acknowl-
edged Mr.. Smith of the Manufacturers
Shoe CO. has signifed his intention Of
again offering prize. This with the
cup to be given by Mr.. Bartlett of the
brewery and So merchandise order
offered by B. F. Ehlers & Co. comprise
the donations to date.
Judging from the number of starters
in the last race, which was thought
by so many to be joke, the entries for
the Elimination Race on the 10th will
probably run up to fifty, or even more.
Many of the athletes in other lines of
sport have been making inquiries with
view to entering. There will be no
entrance fee required for either the
elimination or the main event. Entries
for the former must be received bv
the sporting editor of this paper before
6 P. m. Saturday, Jan. 9th, and the
latter before 6 p m. Saturday, Jan. 16
To enter the latter, one must cover the
course in the elimination race in 10
minutes or better.
1t is hoped that more of the heavy