Sequachee Valley news. (Sequachee [Sequatchie], Tenn.) 1896-1952, 1908-04-02
GanderbOne's April Forecast.

(Cqtyrg1f zoos, BY c. H. Riethl
The April rains will put bit
Of Irish in the lawn,
And a new and brighter augurv
Will paint the east at dawn.
The songs of birds will fill the day
And the night be full of frogs,
And every time cloud blows up
1t will rain cats and dogs,
And water nevis and other brutes,
And also pollywogs.
The brown thrush will return to sing
its song at even hush, and the kind
eyed COW will moult and rear a
new and redder plush; the young
mans thoughts will love to dwell up
on his lady love, while he is not the
one at all that she is voting of
The railroads, mean while, will re-
trieve
Their spirits and elate
Upon the knockout blow the courts
Have dealt the 2-cent rate.
They Il all rebait their hooks again,
And drop them in the pool;
And when T. R. gets after them,
They'll all cry April fool !"
And then there will be doings in the
presidential race, for everybody in it
will accelerate the pace. The hoofs of
Mr. Johnson will put up a cloud of
dirt, and Mr.. Bryan will put ON a
most terrific squirt. The presidential
bee which has been up in Bill Taft's
hat will be removed by Roosevelt from
that high habitat; and when it seems
the field behind imperils Teddy's bets,
the bee will be slipped in the seat of
William s trouserettes.
Whereat the very earth will rock,
And sod and bits of loam
Will obfuscate the sky each time
The sting is driven home;
And while to all the others once
They pass the grandstand twice,
Bills T. and B. will bIandly ask,
Whom shall we run for viceY"
April was named for Venus, the Ro-
man goddess of spring She was the
mother Of Aeneus, and attended the
first Mothers Congress with that
young man III her arms. She was a
very fashionable woman, and invented
divorce. She was at different times
the wife of Vulcan, Mars, Mercury,
Adonis and Anchises, and held the
matrimonial record until Lillian Rus
sell. The planet Venus was named af-
ter her, as was the city of Venice.
She is also the heroine of aThree
Weeks. -
The baseball player will resume
} With letters on his suit
And the fan will sit ont in the sun
And violently root.
His supper will grow cold and stale,
His wife will swear a bit,
And the cook will make chalk mark
on
The kitchen door and quit.
The straw hat season will come in,
and the oyster will go OUT the last
few focks of buckwheat cakes will
sort of hang about; The spring cleo
ton will reflect red fire against this
! sky, another good share of the eartf
will suddenly go dry, and the Congress
will debate upon relief laws for thu
losers, and lay a reservation out fol
our unhappy boozers.
The program for All FOOLS Day viii
be more elaborate than usual Mr.
Roosevelt will give a dinner at th'
White House to those who think III
isn't going to run again. Mr.. Rookie
| feller will give a banquet at Cleve
land to those who think he is going t.
pay that 500, 600, 600 fine. Senate
Elkins will give bran dance on hi
: country place to those who think the,
have any notion of letting the Duke 0
= the Abruzzi get away. Mr.. Hartman
will give pink tea at the Waldorf
Astoria to all persons who think h
: is licked. Mr.. Bryan will give hug
lawn party at has home near Lincol
. . to all persons thinking he is going +
9 step aside for Mr. johnson. Othe
fools will be cared for in various othe