The weekly chieftain. [volume] (Vinita, Craig County, Okla.) 1905-1913, 1908-11-06
SHEEP OF NO AVAIL
AT LEAST FOR THE PURPOSES OF
A NARCOTIC.
If Any One Doubts II, and viii Take
the Risk Of Asking MIR, Butter
wick About II, He Will
Be Convinced.

Butterwick had a fit OF sleeplessness
one night lately, and after yainly try
ing to lose himself In slumber he hap
pened to remember that he once read
in an almanac that a man could force
himself to sleep by imagining that he
saw flock OF sheep jumping over a
fence, and by counting them as they
jumped. lie determined to try the
experiment, and closing his eyes he
fancied the sheep jumping, and be-
gan 20 count. He had reached his
14Oth sheep, and was beginning to
doze off, when Mrs. Butterwick sud
denly said;
Joseph"
Well, what?"
81 believe that yellow hen of ours
wants to set"
20, don't bother me with such truck
as that nowl Shut up and go to
sleep"
Then Butterwick started his sheep
again, and commenced to count. He
got up to 120, and was feeling as II
he would drop of any moment, when,
Just as his Hist sheep was about 10
take that fence, one of the twins be-
gan to cry.
Blame that child!" he shouted at
Mrs. Butterwick. why don't you tend
to il and put It TO sleep. Hush up,
you little brat, or I'll spank you'll"
When Mrs. Butterwick had quieted
II, Butterwick, although little nerv-
Gus and excited, concluded to try IL
again Turning on the imaginary NUT
ton, he began once more. Only g.
sheep had slid over the fence when
Butterwick's mother-in-law knocked az
the door, and asked IL he was awake.
When she learned that he was. she
said she believed he had forgotten 10
close the back shutters. and she
thought she heard burglars in the
yard.
Then Butterwiek arose in wrath and
went down TO see about 1t. He ascer.
tanned that the shutters were closed as
usual. and as he returned TO bed, he
resolved that either that woman would
leave the house for good in the morn
ing, or else he would.
However. he thought he might as
well give the almanac plan another
trial, and setting the sheep In motion
he began 10 count. This time he
reached 240 and would probably have
got TO sleep before the SO0th sheep
jumped had not Mixs new dog in the
next yard suddenly become homesick
and begun to express his feelings In a
series OF prolonged and exasperatlng
bowls.
Butterwick was mad Dropping the
saeep. he leaped from bed and began
10 lombard Mix's new dog with boots,
soap dishes and every loose object he
could lay his hands on. He hit the
animal at last with a plaster bust of
Daniel Webster and induced the dog
to retreat to the stable to think about
home in silence.
II seemed almost ridiculous TO re-
sumo those sheep again, but he deter
mined 10 give the almanac man one
more chance, so as they began TO
Jump the fence he began 20 count,
anu hllef Seeing lne elBhty SECOND
sheep safely over, he was gliding
gently into the land of dreams when
Mrs. Butterwiek rolled out OF bed and
fell on the floor with such violence
that she walked both the twins and
started them crying, while Butter
wieks motherin-law came downstairs,
four steps at a time, to ask them II
they felt that earthquake.
The situation was too awful for
words. Butterwick regarded II for q
minute with speechless Indignation,
and then seiEing pillow he went over
to the sofa In the back sitting.room
and lay down on the lounge He fell
asleep In ten minutes without the as
sistance Of the almanac. but he
dreamed all night that he was being
butted around the equator by a Cots.
void ram, and he woke III the morning
with a terrific headache and a convic-
tion that sheep are good enough for
wool and chops. but not worth cent
as a narcotlc-New York Weekly.
/ An Old / ava