The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-11-06
HUNOR OF THE Day


One day an Irishman was asked to come
to work an hour earlier than usual rms
he promised to do. Next morning ne was
been no good if Old come. as was fast
asleep."-Tit Bits.
I'VE are to have joint debate betTeen
a phonograph and a graphophione; h HON
are you to conduct H?" GOING 70 turn
to run down gets the acknowledgements
Courier-Journal.
seeing Europe for the first time. that
you people had lot Of intsresti9 s osS
things" the native apologized, but your
heiresses have come over snd mad most on
them put in good repair.'--Pittsourg Oh
server.
Professor Cat chemistry. examinati No.S
Under what combination is gold released
most quickly? Student-Marriage.-Fl
gende Blaetter.
Mrs Hicks was telling some ladies about
the burglar scare in her house the night
ad Got np and he there irons under the
bed. ! saw mans legs sticking o e.r5a
pargsT es sssls So my S husband ess
He heard the noise. too.'-Eyerybody's
us Jones cosmopolitan" Yes. Dutch
treat and French ave."-Puck.
"I hear Lushley has bought his boy a
schooners Tor himself. Puck
Jiii-Yes, 1 pawned it again today for the
twentieth time.-London Opinion.
Dat Darwinian theory, said Uncle
Ebep, wouldn't worry me none II couid
doubiin' on de trail."-W ashingtop Star.
Papa (from the next room)-Ethel aren't
1Yes papa: we were just speaking Of
er-striking a match.-T1t-Bits
This cash register you sold me is a
fraud" declared the country editor. just
like the sample" argued the salesman. l
tn9Tght that S sant pnt oq potatoes turnps
and the like in these tiny bins. -Pltts-
burg Post
what bait do You use? Railroad Magnate
(absentiy)- Rebate,-Baltimore American.
Father seems impressed with your talk
about coupons" said the maiden; Ha aps
y 0n feal youth soo saved up toward
a piano for our little flat."-Louisvllle
Courier-Journal. rhsf-e~- 'tit
ct want a photograph representing me
| just as 1 am: None Of this touching- up
business understand You t,s are n fn one
rapher. Better try the police statien, IFS
a Bertillon style of picture your siter'
| Philadelphia Ledger.
Did the brides father give her AWAY
mo sir: when he was asked now olu
| she was he lied like gentleman. '-hous-
| ton Post.
| Meeting the Need-Lady-No, DON'T
want no brushes. nor no laces! Peddler.
| Here you are, madam, Grammar lor be
| einners," only sixpence!-London opinion
A woman may fool her husband into
| believing that he is the head OF the hoyse,
| but she can't fool the neighoors.-Ne"
| York Press.
| DE real resourceful man., SAID Oncle
| Chen when some one hands him lemon
| is ready wifi de sugar and other fixin
| to make it tol-able pleasant to take -
| Washington Star.
.sYou say one of the nurses at the hos.
pital has your hearth she has, indeesu.
and the doctor has your appendix SHr-
gerry is making WONDERFUL surioes'
Houston Post.
There's no money in stories,, now
adays." complained the young author az
thew walked along Broadway; Money.
replied the practical man.. Sure there
money in stories. Look at all these SKY
scrapers goin' up"-Boston transcript
Briggs-They say the French are dete..
riorafinr Cfriggs-I- know II. the last
time I was over in France couldn't even
make them understand their own IAN
guage.-Life.