davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14

of the room. If it moves backwards
from you, intuition tells you to step
forward. Don't step too speedily or
you'll find yourself walking on the
ceiling, head down. Finally an open
ing is reached. You step out onto a
floor which bounces up and down as
you meander along. A moment later
you walk upon what seems to be the
top of an airship. loosely inflated. BY
that time, If you're one of the fair
sex, you need protection. The recess
es are all pitch dark.
Then, perhaps you are swayed by a
wave-like motion of the entire room,
which very naturally ELECTS very prop
er screams from the women folks.
Freed from ocean-liner imitation, you
are Immediately introduced to a 400
miles-an-hour cyclone. coming from the
floor ceiling, walls and in fact from
all sides. The floor begins to move
sideways with a quick-jerky motion.
You try to steady yourself on a rail,
just perceptible in the blackness.
Ouch! It's charged with electricity.
Ahead are several staircases and you
feel rather relieved to think you're
out of it at last. Reaching them safe
ly you start up when, without warning,
the whole contrivance begins to move
backward and forward, compelling
you to grab the rail for safety. In
darkness again, you try to make your
way through a typical labyrinth of
rooms. Feeling along the wall with
one foot ahead of you to ascertain the
nearness of bottomless pits, etc, for
your minds eye sees lots that don't
exist, you bump your nose against a
few barriers and eventually push
against a wall, which gives way and
you find yourself alone in a turnstile,
Enclosed on all sides. When your ter
ror has reached a burning point some
one else behind pushes the wall as you
did and you are liberated, only to
again find yourself in the midst of
weird ghostlike cries and see skele-
tons darting hither and thither ION
pulleys). A little scream just at this
moment might be appropriate. Just
to get your mind off the terrors of the
place, the next few turns are tame,
when suddenly your feet slide out from
under you and you find yourself shoot
ing down a chute In a sitting position.
Daylight ahead and once again, before
you have time to think II over, you've
landed among the crowds outside,
thanks to the manly strength Of the
spieler, whose arms received you
where the chute ended.
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
Couldn't Scare Them.

A Denver man who rents his motor
car by the trip or hour was seated in
the machine with friend, waiting for
business, on a downtown corner the
other afternoon, when young couple
from the country came up. 1t was
plain to be seen they were bride and
groom. The young man from the
country said they had just arrived
from central Kansas and wanted to
see Denver. He arranged for the
motor car man to take them for an
hours trip and paid the charges in
advance. The country couple took the
back seat. The drivers friend sat in
the front seat with him.
I'm going to have some fun" said
the driver in a low tone to his friend.
I'm going to run fast and scare those
hayseeds."
He ran to the east edge Of town and
then let the machine out to the limit
1t rocked and jumped till the driver
friend became alarmed.
Say" he said. you'd better ease up
on IT or you'll kill us all"
Look around and see If the bride
and groom are scared" was the reply,
Before the other man could turn and
look the Kansas farmer touched the
driver on the shoulder.
Hey, Teller" he said, here's anoth-
err dollar. Make her run fast, will
you?"-Denver Post.
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
ALMOST A SHADOW.
Gained 20 lbs. on Grape-Nuts.

There's a wonderful difference be-
tween a food which merely tastes good
and one which builds up strength and
good healthy flesh.
1t makes no difference how much we
eat unless we can digest it. 1t is
not really food to the system until
1t is absorbed. A Yorkstate woman
says:
Il had been a sufferer for teA years
with stomach and liver trouble, and
had got so bad that the least bit Of
food such as | then knew, would give
me untold misery fof hours after
eating.
II lost flesh until I was almost a
shadow of my original self and my
friends were quite alarmed about me.
First / dropped coffee and used
Postum, then began to use Grape-Nuts
although had little faith 1t would do
me any good.
But continued to use the food and
have gained twenty pounds in weight
and feel like another person in every
way. feel as IL life had truly begun
anew for me.
Il can eat anything L like now in
moderation, suffer no Ill effects, be on
my feet from morning until night.
Whereas year ago they had to send
me away from home for rest while
others cleaned house for me, this
spring have been able to do It myself
all alone.
my breakfast is simply Grape-Nuts
with cream and a cup of Postum, with
sometimes an egg and piece of toast,
but generally only Grape-Nuts and
Postum. And l can work until noon
and not feel as tired as one hours
work would have made me year ago."
There's a Reason"
Name given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek, Mich. Read, The Road to Well
ville," in pkgs.
Ever read the above letter. A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true. and full Of human
Interest
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
Mothers ACCOMPLISHMENT.

In the Bohemian set of New York
two of the popular members are well
known writer and his wife, who also
has written several books. They have
a daughter about four years old. Re-
Gently the little girl was visiting at
the home OF a friend and her small
playmate asked her: Can your
mamma sew"
The daughter of the literary pair
evidently was a bit chagrined She
could not remember that she had ever
seen her mamma sew. She is a truth
full child and would not claim any adj
vantages she was not sure OF, yet she
felt that mammals honor was at stake.
81 don't know II mamma can sew,
she replied. obviously, but she can
smoke a cigarette"
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
AstonIshed Great Pianist.

A collection Of anecdotes of musical
celebrities just published at Leipsic
contains this one under the head Of
Anton Rubinstein. When the great
pianist was making his tour of the
United States he sat one day in a
railroad train looking out upon the
scenery. Suddenly a man sitting
across the aisle spat over Rubinstein's
head out Of the open window. The
master drew back and gazed in aston
ishment and anger at the vulgar Amer
lean, who smiled and said, soothingly:
Don't worry; know my distance"
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
Strictly Fresh Eggs.

There are summer resorts. remote
from any agricultural communities,
where fresh farm products are even
harder to obtain than in the city. 1t
was at such a place that the new
boarder, who had eaten four or five
breakfasts there, began to wonder
why the eggs were invariably served
fried
See here?" he inquired one morn
ing of the genial colored man who
waited upon him, "why do you always
fry eggs here? Don't you ever boil
them?"
"Oh-oh, yes, sah!" responded the
waiter, pleasantly. "Of co'se. yo' kin
have 'em boiled, IL yo' wants 'em. But
you know, sab, yo' takes de risk"
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
WITH RAPID FLIGHT
FATHER TIME KEEPS STEADILY
ON HIS WAY.
Too Slowly in Youth and Too Swift
iy as Age Approaches, the Years
Pass Onward Until the
Appointed End.

"The eagle and the condor can Ger
tainly fly some, but" said the man
with frost in his hair, they don't be-
gin to be in 1t with steady going time.
you see, the eagle and the condor
have to rest once in a while, while
time keeps a-plugging right along
there's something uncanny about the
flight of time.
and not only does 1t keep going
so, but as we grow older it seems all
the time to be speeding up; going fast
er and faster. You know how when
we were young the days seemed long
and the seasons interminable and the
years without end? While now the
mornings come and go and the weeks
fly by and the years we count with
little halt between, they go so fast;
and what with my increasing years
and the seeming quicker flight of time
as We grow older / find myself now,
for the first time in my life, in sight
of the end; and this is a new and
sensation.
You see, when we are young, still
on the upward slope of life, not yet
to the top of the hill, the whole world
seems to us yet to come and we ad-
vance to greet 1t joyfully. and then
when at middle life we get to the top
of the hill 1t spreads out all around
US, and of the end we never think;
but as we go down the other slope
there comes, as | find there has come
gently to me now time when we
realize that our prospect is gradually
but surely narrowing.
ITO be sure we give ourselves every
year we can; we are going to be long
lived; not cut off at 70 or 80 or 80,
we are going to live to be a hundred
anyway, as we do not doubt; but even
so we have passed the summit. we
have lived the greater number OF our
years, and We are drawing now on the
steadily diminishing remainder; and
when that idea once strikes you
squarely so that you take it in it gives
you something to think about.
But not to worry over, not the
least little bit You still have your
work to do, haven't you? Why, sure,
and you find in 1t and in every breath
you draw a greater Joy than ever. Life
is mellower and ripper and fuller of
happiness. You don't waste time wor-
rying over trifling things. You come
to have wings of your own now too, on
which you mount to take a wider sur.
vey, to see with clearer vision. and
you come back to your own corner
with a contentment you never had be-
fore, kinder charity.
Life is pleasant on this slope, very
pleasant; but l do wish l could invent
some sort of brake to check the flight
of time. Talk about eagles and con
doris! They are not in it for flying
with time!"
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
a THRILLER

DOW, whee-ee-e, 10000,
gee-e-whi-iz, but that was
a bump"
1t was our friend from
the sand dunes of Indiana,
Michigan, Illinois, Ohio,
Minnesota, Wisconsin, or
any other state with plen-
ty of farming districts,
trying out a thriller at
Coney Island, Atlantic
City, one of Chicago's big
four amusement parks or
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14

ride-lady" 20 cents for another trip for
yourself and friend.
Then there's the ticker That's a
new ride just put on in the west this
season. You get into a round car and
the device is dragged up an incline ior
the downward thrill. Starting down 1t
enters a labyrinth of rails, the car re-
volving In one direction and the de-
scent carrying it in another. This
gives a remarkable opportunity to
learn how it feels to be jerked in two
directions at the same time.
The Potsdam railway is a practical
device, made in Germany" which
runs on an overhanging rail and which
magnates among the Teutons threaten
to make a conventional mode of travel
there within few years. The thrill in
this consists of hoping 1t won't fall
off this trip.
Amusemeht-loving Americans also
have the aerostat Cars are suspended
at the ends of long cables, you are
locked in and the device is started. 1t
is like a Maypole, except that the
cables don't become interwined around
the pole. AS the speed increases the
cars rise higher at the ends of the
cables and, inclined. speed through
ether far out over the heads of the
multitude. Anyone who is susceptible
to sea-sickness might possibly become
immune by this treatment for the
blues of everyday life. The giant
swing, while it is not much like the
aerostat gives the same feeling to
some.
Then there is the airship, which ma
jestically winds about the outside of a
tall tower and then winds down again
Merry-go-rounds are numerous and
despite the fact that this is the father
of all thrills, It still has its patrons
among the children.
Among the time-honored creations is
the shoot-the-chutes, which consists OF
slide down a toboggan and a few
bounces after the boat strikes the
water of the lake at the bottom of the
chute. II you're wise you'll not sit
In the front seat. There's where the
big bump comes and the occupants oil
the bow of the boat feel the leaps over
the water most.
Having travelled on rides enough tc
stimulate an appetite for something in
different line We steer our down
state friend into the stationary de
vices for the same purpose. These are
of every variety. You step into one
at random. The floor starts to move
with a circular motion toward the tor
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
COW BROKE UP BARN DANCE

OF course, realism is all well enough
in its way, but II can easily be carried
to an excess. Here. for instance, is
the case Of that barn dance in the
east, where an actual barn was the
scene of revelry.
And in the midst of the fun blood.
et COW broke away from her stall and
took an active interest In the proceed
ings. ripping the shirt waist from a
college youth and hooking a roomy
hole in the big fiddle. After which
she praDced up the middle with her
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14

head down, and six girls and three
boys crawled onto the feed box and
fell of in a shrieking heap, and the
athlete of the party, with wild yells,
broke the record on a quick climb to
the hayloft, and four girls hid under
the straw cutter, and there was the
merry mischief to pay. The COW
quickly had her gambol out, and then
backed into her stall with a satisfied
moo and Immediately resumed her
cud.
But the barn dance was effectually
broken up.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14
kindness. and chserfuIn.ss.

Kindness is contagious. The spirit
of harmony trickles down by a thou
sand secret channels into the inmost
recesses of the household life. II is
hard to be angry in the presence of
lmperturbable good nature. 1t is we'll.
nigh impossible to be morose in the
face of cheerful and generous help
fulness.-Henry Van Dyke
The Yale expositor. (Yale, St. Clair County, Mich.) 1894-current, 1908-08-14


for that matter at any city or town
which supports these summer devices
for extracting coin of the realm from
thine plebeians.
No matter how stolid he may be in
life's ordinary pursuits or how emo
tionless in an interurban wreck, his
spine curls, his sympathetic nerve
system tickles and he is compelled
to give himself up to thrills. You can
find him in every resort where there
are scenic railways, roller-coasters,
velvet-coasters, figure-eights, shoot
the-chutes, dip-the-dips, leap-the-gaps,
ticklers and scores of other modes for
shooting the electric currents up and
down the spinal cord of the laughing,
bowling public.
He Is a source of amusement for his
tutored city brother who tickles the
day ledger with a pen during daylight
and cavorts about on amusement de-
vices throughout the summer evenings.
The city pleasure-seeker has much OF
this sport and the thrills fail to rise
up in his anatomy the way they do In
that of the man. woman and child who
are taking their first turn at the
game.
Statisticians claim that there are SO
many actual thrillers of different call.
Der and variety at work daily in the
United States that if one should travel
on every one of them, just once, the
trip would take all summer. There
were more this year than ever before
If all of the rides were strung out
they would reach clear across the con
tinent, high browed scientists claim.
But that only goes to show that
America is amusement-crazy. The
populace and the elite, too, can't get
nois man with an idea proposed to in
stall an automobile in the parks of the
country and this device was scheduled
TO run down an incline, turn double
somersault and alight upon its wheels
again. Americas thrillers are terrific
and getting more so each year, but
the man from the middle west was
perhaps a bit premature with his
death-defying machine. Sometimes II
didn't alight as per program.
The process of starting a thrill
through the pleasure-seeker's frame
consists of laying out device which
combines both speed and the unexpect
ed. This subject has been studied
by every amusement manager in the
United States and they can't get the
Jumps, drops and bumps long enough
or fast enough to attract your shekel'
from your bank account to their Golfers
with the desired rapidity.
Say, by heck, I'm afeared to ride
on tibet shebang. 1t don't hev a safe
look, to me-"
Well. hurting through the air faster
than an aeroplane in working order
certainly doesn't look safe, but at the
same time the visitor to the city who
made that remark did not know where
of he spoke. Every single device, n.
matter how small, how large or how
"safe-looking," is required to undergo
a rigid test by the building commits
sioners. before being allowed to accep
the public's dimes. There must be ;
block system of lights, much the saEI'
as that used by railway systems. alst
stoppage devices on every incline L
prevent cars, chairs or other seatini
vehicles from sliding backwards dowI
an incline.
The framework Of the device is test
ed for its strength and made to sup
port far heavier weights than are eve
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
NEW JERSEY RESORTS.
ATLANTIC CITY.
HOTEL RUDOLF

AMERICAN EUROPEAN
Renovated and Refurnished Throughout.
directly on the Beach. with uncbstruetsd
view or the ocean and boardwalk. 400 Ocean
view Rooms en- suite, with 100 private sea
water baths Home for Washing tonians in
tantic City. Special rates for May and
June. For further Information write 10 Ru-
COLI OF phone to Harvey's Restaurant, n.
SSsa JOEL HIL.LMAN. Proprietor. Tny1T-tf
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
MEDICAL
BUILDERS AND CONTRACTORS.

ARE YOU GOING To BUII d. Going 10
remodel your house, Let Us help furnish
ideas. suggestions, and give yOI est mates.
Painting RapeTiug, decorating carleting
cenenting. plumbing, gas-dtting, timing
1Obbing attended TO promptly.
CHAS. J. RAFF CO. 1874 You ct. nv.
fe9-eOd-Q0f
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
FoP RENT-SuBuRBAN.

FOR RENT-FUrnIsied for july and 4U-
gust 1854 Newton st.. Mt. Pleasant; nine
rooms. bath, three porches; telephone large
yard. garden. Apply on premises. ss1s-2f
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
MONEY TO LOAN

IF voc NEED MONEY to pay rent or buy
coal viii furnish all you need. ] lend you
on your furniture or plano; these loans are
strictlY PRIVATE. TTy ma p. O. BOX 2943
Station G fe5-tr
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
FOR SALE-LoTs.

FOR SAIsE-Two fine building lots. North
west section. frontage 60Nl20. Il cents square
foot, lots selling for 50 30 % cents square
foot This is bargain. no agents need an
ply. Address BOX sol. Times Office. jeI7-3t
The Washington times., 1908-06-17

REGULAR DINNER Zoe. lunch 15c; special
sunday dinner S5c; everything the best; try
us. 5oS Pennsylvania ave. Sc Phone LIN
coin 1858. te9-u.. sa. rll-sOt
The Washington times., 1908-06-17

PROPOSALS FOR ICE AND FORAGE.-war
Department. Washington, D. c. June l3 1908.
5EeaIed proposals, IN duplicate, viii be re-
s1hsn opened sor furnishing ice and forage
Cor the War Department Bureaus and Offices
.durlng year ending June 80, 1903. Iuforma-
.tion furnished on application. Proposals must
he in envelopes indorzed Proposals for lee
Proposals for Fora gs" respectively. and
addressed NJ. r. THORP, Chief OF supply
s-Dtv. 5el5.17,I9
The Washington times., 1908-06-17

YUM! YUMiP' That's what you'u say after
e meal at one Of cur places. Three OF them
I7th and q. 2l7 7th l2O5 Pennsylvania ave
mYla-nl. NJ. sa-set
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
WHERE TO DINE.
rHE NTANnR

THE MANOR. 700 18TH ST. N. ".
Cafe and Lunch meals la carte; table
de hote dinner on Sunday; every thing strictly
nTst-class- je13-ss, N, w-s0t
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
AUCTION SALES.
Biggest Bargains on Earth

Eblgg6SI bargains Oh Eartn
Ten carloads OF useful goods from James
tIOwn.
READ THE FOLLOWING,
! China Slop Jars, 37lke
Washstands. soc
boc Window Shades IOc
China Toilet SETS Use
/ thest make) Iron Couches and Pads COM
plete. saS Real value, $40.
s. Oak Rocking Chairs 15c.
Double Sheets, for 81.
Bed Spreads, 65c; real value. $50
Linen Table Tops. &c; real value. 75c.
Feather Pillows, soc.
iron Cots. G9c. real value. 60
oak Washstands. $40; real value. t450.
a-piece Enameled Bed and Iron Spring,
'S--l5-not the price Of spring
Real Felt Mattresses, 50 90; cost si2.
Enamel WaEhstands and ToiletWaTs. COM
plete. 700.
Iron frame Folding Porch Chairs, 75ei
cost s.
Enamel Iron Folding Tables, snap top csc.
Real value, IS.
Rustic Chairs and Rockers 75c.
solid Oak Center Tables large size. 69c.
Extra size double Blankets, Toe.
AND OTHER GOODS JUST AS CHEAP.
426 Ninth st. n. w.
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
SIGN SHOW CARDS.

TELL PEOPLE about yourself: posters up
to-date business show cards, theatrical illus
tratsd posters of all Kinds. slices. etc. PAUL.
ALEXANDER. C-3 L ST. ~.
.ly27-w.Sa. nj 0t
The Washington times., 1908-06-17

THE ROYAL RUDOLF REHAGE, Prop,
605-t6A 18th St NV.
Home cooking. civil prices. quick service
VIII appeal 10 your palate. purse and cCncep-
ton or a Clean place 10 eat"
uyls-un. ". Sa DOT
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
426 Ninth St. N. w.


MARCUS NOTES, Aucti0neer.
DISTRICT GOVERNMENT SALE Of build
tng, No. 5le % S. ne. on FRIDAY, JUNE 70,
1sos, at p. M, I viii sell al public auction
10 this highest bidders the brick building
number 90 "a 81 me- terms cash at time
OF sale. Building 10 be removed BY pur-
chaser within fifteen days after sale. failure
10 so remove the purchase price viii be for
delted 70 the T.. s. and District Govern
Euents and the Commissioners reserve Ths
right 20 resell same at public auction, pro-
cseds from such last sale 10 be deposited
10 the credit OF the L. s. and District OF
Columbia BY order Commissioners j.. q.
N, c. HARGROVE. Property Clerk D e.
II
AT WALTER B. WILLIAMS & co. Auction
Rooms, or, 10th and ID SITS NV, on SatuT-
cay June - 1905 AT 10 O. clock. will be sold
al goods stored Ia the names u Birdie
Brock. n. c. Miller Nellie Ward lex. q. l..
Smith, James Payton, Mary Allen. Eliza
Harris, Mrs. NJ. c. MOXley. L. s. STORAGE
COMPANY. jeIS-St-exSu
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
CHALFONTE
THE LEEDS COMPANY
CAPE MAY.
NORTHEAST REAL ESTATE.

BIG DEMAND FOR SMALL HOUSES
Stafford & Norway. the only real estate
nrTn IN Northeast They devote their entire
time to Northeast property What have you
20 rent or sell2 We handle real estate loans
insurance. collect your rents, insure your
property. Seventh and II sts- ne. mhs8-s0s
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
FOR SALE-HoUSEs.

FOR SALE-Grand opportunity for a baker
70 buy q nice h0mss fine 2-stoIy frame house
with a splendid economical brick oven with
bake house, all under same roof: good
Eiabliugi wagon house, fuel house harness
room, etc. all in nrst-class condition and
ready q move into and so TO work: good
lot, 50-fJot alley nearly Zeg0 square rect
or ground; perfect title. in an improving
section not far from Lincoln Park, price
only A-'Iv9' $500 or more cash. ana Sl5 or
more per month Apply on premises. f7z7 A
81. Sc 1el7-st
The Washington times., 1908-06-17
MONEY TO LOAN
On Real Estdue.

THE NEW Municipal Idlng f. solid
mountaineering the awskt ming and gTou-r-
Of Washington we have son large fun fs -
place at 3 per cent. smaller -ums al 90 md 8
per cent
THE HARRISON REALTY COMPANY.
jeiG-tf 90 81. ". vs..
MONEY TO LOAN On approved rifv T--I
estate a. lowest current rates. Special urf5-i
!eEes with respect - prior payments. isrEs
Amounts specially TYLER & RUTHER-
EODR 49, 10Th ST. noI8-fT
SECOND TRUST
LOANS IN REAL ESTATE.
Any Amount. Lowest Rates
NATIONAL LOAN AND INV. CO
THOMPSON BLDG. 705 18Th ST. n W
Opposite treasury. Next Drug Stors
se2O-u
MONEY TO LOAN on d. C real. ESTATE
Lowest rates OF interest. Payments on min
eipai ia amounts OF $40 OF more received A.
any interest period. THE F. II. SMITH Co
Bond Builcing, 14os New York ave. Je5-tf
MONEY TO LOANED 10 sec, 000 On D Q
real estate. Interest low. AMI all transactions
conducted with economical consideration sor
borrowers.
VA. H. SAUNDERS & co.
ll0I + ST. y. ".
MONEY TO LOAN AT LOWEST RATES
D. INTEREST on d. c. Real Estate. 10
& Easonzbls delay.
WALTER H ACKER
fss-u 1870 ST y. W