The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1908-01-29
1T rs EMBARRASSING.
SITUATIONS THAT ARE AGoNlzlNo 70
MRS. couNTRIFIED.

IL was SplenQlQ, dno e3clAlueu, net
cheeks aglow and her eyes bright with ex-
element. "Seven courses-not counting
the oyster cocktail to begin with-and !
never made misstroke with fork or knife,
and there was no end Of brand new imple-
ments too. I came near making terrible
miscue, though, with the oyster cocktail
You zee, the dining room was rather dark,
being lighted only with pink shaded Gan.
dies, and in the gloom the cocktail looked
just like sherbet. couldn't imagine, Of
course, what sherbet was doing there at
that time, but it was not mine to reason
why, and 80 plunged boldly in, resolved
to do or die with the first weapon that
seemed at all fitted to meet the sherbet
emergency, and I came dreadfully near to
dying with modification. For fraction
Of a second I hesitsted between long,
slim handled spoon and short, fat, gold
lined one, and then, With what consider.
ed marvellous forethought, decided the
long, slim handled one could better be
spared for future contingencies and select
sd the short, fat one. And 7 was just tot
tering on the brink Of that cocktail with
1t In my fingers when looked up and b.
held the hostess eating hers with an oyster
fork. Ny arm actually was palded, I was
30 stunned, and I had great difficulty In
making anything like my usual de1terous
lightning change didn't fully recover
from the shock until well into the soup.
"But the best part Of the luncheon, aft
er all, was that there was another country.
relation there besides myself. She sat right
opposite me, poor thing, and just gloated
over her misery. II anything, she was
more Of a freshman than because she had
not been graduated from the waiting to.
zee what others do stage, and with each
new course placed before her I could SO
the terrible mental struggle thns was 60
ing on and knew just how her mind was
being torn with doubts between tho long
tined fork for the entree and the short
thin one for tho salad. Oh, It was pitiful
the way her poor little country relation
fingers trembled over tho halves and forks
and spoons. knew she felt Just the way
you do when you watch the dentist hunt
ing around among his tools for some nsw
instrument to torture you with. Really I
sympathized with her from the bottom o4
my heart, but I could not resist the temp
tation TO lead her astray once or twice, and
honestly IL was the best kind q lesson,
for 1t will teach her the folly Of the walt
Ing to see what others do habit. That .
such weak, vaoillatins policy, you know,
that really by tho time the salad Il reached
you haven't mind Of your own lstt and,
besides, IL demands such "A unrelentins
surveillance over the othse guests that
your tongue, which should b your most
powerful ally In oonossling Jour igno-
rance, u enectually bridled, and the mark
Of the country relation u branded upon
you as certainly - though you had looked
at some dish tho butler was serving and
had refused to take any-snd that reminds
me Of how I once forgot tho exception 70
tho rule and did something atrocioualy
worse.
1T was some time ago, when IL was the
custom to pass great heaping basksts o(
fruit. II Wa altogether . decorative
course, and tho guests wers sxpsotsd %
take . grape or two o. fresh d8 With
which the basket waa oznameuted and
leave tho foundation Of larger fruit undiS.
turbed A. saw the basket making The
circuit Of tho table wss % overcome With
fear that an orange would b thIus1 upon
me and that would not know the latess
method Of dissecting IL, that whsu the
butler finally reached me and I saw big
yellow banana exposed grabbed for Il
ravenously, a. though I had not tasted
food In weeks. I happened 10 b almosa
the last ono, and - glanced up ssw IN
a.. ~,hsf Z hs& HnmA ThSrA wAno
all the other gussts daintily nibblins at .
tiny grape or . hS and there was that
ghastly, hideous, swful banana IN front
Of me.
"Iwas younger thsn, and I presume my
imagination was moro highly keyed mp.
At any rate that banana hald mo In hor.
rible gpell-fsscinated me. I couldn't O.
my mind away from IL. And a. rat thsro,
with my eyes glued upon IL, u seemed %
change into . horrible, monstrous, gin.
ming thing that leered At me- and taunted
mo with my poor country bred mann@A
"Of courre IL was trivial, instgnidoanAr
thing, and I doubt whether any OF ths
guests noticed 1t ut all, but had besa sn
ticipating and dreading that luncheon @
long and my nerves were 20 overwfought
that when the affair was al over and tho
hateful thing had been removed I actually
was on the verge Of nervous prostratior,
and registered VOW that mover a. long
a. I lived would b entioed away from
my own humble table again.
"Oh, Of course you who 1.-Two upon such
dinners every day Of your Lives, " the young
woman went on, noticing for the first tuis
the look Of polite amazement On hes vidS.
or's fsee, "cannot appreciate tho state oS
mind Of q country bred woman In modss-
ate circumstances when ehs receives An
invitation to largo dinner party fsom
ono Of her oity frieuds but IL 70 The syouS
Of tho year 10 her-ths thing uoost - b
looked forward to and dfsadsd Shs = aoe
an ignorant nor an III bred woman, and
shs has lots Of pretty things Of hs1 own at
home, but In tho rural enviro1nsnt In
which she lives IL u impossible foe h3 TO
keep mp on all tho newest dishes and ths
methods Of serving them at fashionable
course dinner, and when she goes to one
and commits no oonspiouous blunder she
Il naturally elated, just a. am. must
confess, though, that the times when !
have felt proud Of myself have more than
been offset by the thought OF the glaring
and tho other msnbers OF my
family have made. New York Press.
Your Name and Address In . Letter.
Make practice Of signing your name
In full; 1t il the dgnihed way. And II you
have not given your address In tho begin.
ming, be sure you do 1t at the close OF yorR
letters. To date letters is good habit, but
In most correspondence it Il not 30 impoR
tant as to give your address. Don't -
sumo that people remembsr It; you may
occnnv Iess snaoe in their minda than Won