davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
A PRACTICAL ILLUSTRATION
~~~@~~@~~~

The simple demonstration recorded
in the Philadelphia Public Ledger prob
ably did more toward the enlighten-
ment Of the Missouri judge than hours
of discourse in the courtroom. The
magistrate, travelling on circuit, had be.
fore him. in a small country town, 9
case in which tavern keeper was held
for the payment on a land transaction
of a large amount of money which he
had not agreed definitely to pay.
The court declared that, although his
agreement was not on record. 1t was
involved in a business proceeding con-
nected with it.
After judgment had been rendered,
the court adjourned for dinner. and
the Judge found that the only eating
house in the place was the inn kept by
the defendant in the case he had just
decided. He also found that the defend
ant personally superintendent the prepa-
ration Of the meals, and that the food
was charged for on the European plan.
The judge called for two boiled eggs,
which. with the other food he ordered.
were brought to him done to a turn.
At the end of the meal the bill was
presented to him. He was astonished
to read in it the following items:
1.-TWO boiled eggs, fifteen cents; two
chickens at seventy-five cents, one dol
lar and a half"
Calling the proprietor, he asked !:
"How's this? I've had no chickens
Why do you charge me for them?"
Those are constructive chickens,
your honor" answered the innkeeper.
"WhatY'
"Why, they are implied in the eggs
you know"
His honor began to understand, and
said no more.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

paratively worthless tree, but it works
up well in veneering, and finds many
uses in the manufacture Of furniture.
1t can be stained in imitation Of cherry
and other hard woods.
There are two kinds of veneering-
sawed and sliced-but 1t takes an ex-
pert to tell the difference. The process
OF manufacture is simple and interest.
Ing. The logs, delivered at the factory
In the rough, about thirteen feet in
length, are first cooked Ia hot water
watts to make them soft and workable.
1T does not matter how green they
are. After being thoroughly cooked
they are placed on machines designed
for the purpose, and either sliced by a
powerful knife the length Of the log or
cut by circular saw into slabs about
one-twentieth OF an inch thick. These
slabs are the full length of the log.
and when first cut are 50 pliable that
they can be bent double without break
Ing. The uniform thickness or thin
ness Of the slabs is preserved by the
action OF the machinery, and does not
vary so much as a hairs breadth In the
entire length of the slab.
AFTER the slabs are sliced or sawed
they are seasoned by steaming. This
requires only about twenty-four hours,
and then they are ready for the mar
ket. Some Of the huge oak logs that
come to the factory show by the rings
In them that the trees were from 25O
to 400 years old. Washington Herald.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
no 1xrLoRs COLUMBIA wnDs

Expedition starts to the Strange
Country South Of Panama Zone.
A party of FIVE men, headed by Dr.
Frank Won Teuber, formerly official
photographer Of the Panama Canal
Commission, sailed Saturday on the
steamer La Plata to explore the almost
impossible country which lies to the
south of the canal zone and extends to
the Colombian border, says the New
York Times. The main object OF the
exploration Is to locate coal and min
eral deposits. Incidentally, the Wal
Department has taken a great interes,
in the object Of the expedition and II
desires to obtain accurate maps Of the
district.
The men are backed by private cap
ital. DR.. Won Teuber, who has already
penetrated 40 miles into the 2OS-mile
strip of country, declares that he has
not only seen rich deposits of coal, but
that the Argona tribes, which inhabit
the country, use hard coal as ballast
for their boats. DR.. Won Teuber lost
all the specimens he collected. they hav
Ing been captured by the Indians.
Those who will brave the dangers OF
the trip are, besides the doctor, Car
Won Teuber, his brother; William j
Bartlett of Boston, Denton A. Smith
Of Madison, Wis, and John R. Bradley
Jr., Of Boston.
I'VE are working under ninety
nine-year concession from the Panama
government" said DR.. Won Teuber. "As
soon as we arrive on the isthmus we
will go to see President Amador, and
two days later will make the start u[
the Diablo River. 1 cannot tell how
long we will be gone, but II nothing Is
heard from the party In 100 days
relief expedition will be sent out te
look for u.s.
The expedition took down a great
quantity of stores and each man Is
provided with a complete camping out
fit, including German carbines. There
are also 100000 rounds of ammunition
4ACy SApCCI W ACCp ACoA SAO 0OA A1AeAS
coast, and when well down toward the
center of the strip work their way over
to New Bay, on the Pacific side. All
geological and other specimens found
will be sent to the Smithsonian Insti'
tuition.
The natives, according to DR.. vor
Teuber, are rather childish and curious
but they are exceedingly treacherous
and will only attack at night. He
also declared that Colombia, recogniz-
ing their value In keeping her frontier
was permitting them to arm.
DR.. Won Teuber will take a number
Of friendly Indians with him as guides
He declared that his experience there
had proved to him beyond the shadow
Of doubt that small diamonds and en-
eralds can be found in the country.
OF the last expedition of eighteen
persons which went into the district
only about one-half survived to struggle
back to civilization. The enemy the
explorers had to fight in addition to the
Indians was malarial fever.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
A COURTEOUS eight"

A boxing contest in Japan, as de-
scribed in "Signs and Portents in the
Far East" by Everard Cotes, is an
amusing spectacle conducted with due
fear lest some one get hurt. The au-
thor tells of a combat"
Two fat men numbered up, one from
each side, to plant themselves opposite
to one another in the ring, where they
stood with feet wide apart and looked
at each other. Then one of them lift
ed up a huge leg sideways, until the
knee was almost as high as the shout
der, and brought it down again with a
stamp He repeated the performance
first with one foot and then with the
other a number of times over. His
vis-a-vis copied him exactly.
The two great men were stretching
themselves before their admirers, and
we all waited respectfully but nothing
happened.
Suddenly both squatted down on
their heels. The master Of ceremonies
did the same, and extended a yellow
hand to set great man number one
back an inch exactly; after which he
tapped his fan violently and cater
wauled briefly. A Homeric battle was
surely about to begin.
Not so. Number one champion sud.
denly stood up and went off the plat
form for a drink, which he took with
much ceremony. Number two followed
his example. The first round was over
and neither had touched the other. Up
to the seventh round the performance
was equally preliminary.
Then something happened. Number
two made a spring and clutched al
number one, but number one did not
approve. He folded his arms and back
cd out of the ring.
In the ninth round number one took
the offensive Number two refused, but
was too late in doing so, and received
ais he retired heavy push and an
open-handed smack in the eye, which
sent him flying off the stage.
Number one stood proudly at atten-
ton in the ring, while various officials
in old willow-pattern petticoats crowd
I'd round number two to suggest he
should return to the contest; but num-
Der two had had enough, and would
nOt
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
speaIking Of Drawing,

First Manager see your leading
man has had a cigar named after him.
Second Manager Hope to gracious
It will draw better than he doea-
Yonkers Statesman.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
Jumping.

She This paper says that a Miss
Abbie Lathrop Of CRANKY, Mass, runs
mouse farm. What do you think of
that?
He-I think it must keep her on the
tump.-Yonkers Statesman.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

Wealthy American women have n
Gently taken up ballooning, and
friendly observer Is inspired to dilats
upon the Responsiveness Of the pas
time, and then to let his imagination
soar. A fine balloon, he says, costs
only Ave hundred dollars, and ono
"sailor" can run 1t, whereas a yacht
or even an automobile, may easily eat
up a modest fortune every year. This
is fact. Fancy takes command as the
author suggests the charm of vacations
spent in captive balloons, or, better still,
in kite houses" moored anywhere
from q thousand to ten thousand feet
above the surface, in that pure and
rarefied atmosphere which invalids 20
far to find Provisions would be sent
4p and letters sent down in travelling
basket; there could be telephone con-
nection; and harsh sounds, unsightly
scenes and disagreeable odors would
all be cut off by distance. To be sure
the wind and the kite house might
take a notion to fall simultaneously
Then q woman who had ascended to
escape the tension of business or SCOT
ETY. or family affairs would have fine
chance to learn whether the experiment
lad strengthened her nerves. But
granting that all went well above, and
granting that our women would con-
sent to flee-or f1y-their responsible
ties. such an undertaking would proba'
bly, be hampered from below. Unless tn
occupant Of an air castle arranged II
return to earth at frequent Intervals
her husband or her sweetheart would
get Ter back, even If he had to take tn
risk Of climbing up the cable.
Steam yachts were never cheaper
says the Boston Herald. Just our LUCK
when fashion DEGREES that balloonlns
is the proper caper.
A New York physician recommends
that members of society fly kites fol
their health. He was smart enough 70
suggest something that looks like play
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
The Usual Way.

Say. pop, what's rafle7"
"A raffle, my son. Is where I buy
nineteen chances on Z diamond ring
and the fellow with one chance wins
it."-Kansas City Star.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
In Arctic Alumni Hail.

In Arctic Alumni Hall.
Said the stoodent, my fount'n PEN,
froze-
So couldn't use ink If chose
If they don't warb this hall
I'll use pedcil, that's all
And erase the bistakes with by dose r.
Yale Record.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

There are q lot Of things that man
can't afford to do and he can't afford
not to-so they keep him guessing.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
WINE.

Notorious Willie on tear,
In fywheel caught his hair;
William left this world too soon,
We're seeking for him with spoon
Cornell Widow.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

It II said that no man likes to have
the girl he loves zee him eat
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

our purses.
Justice is not made for the law, but
the law for justice.
There is no salvation without the
salvation of the soul.
Only toy boats are disturbed by ev-
cry wavelet of change.
The promises of faith are better than
the paintings Of fancy.
God links us to Himself that He may
loose us from our sins.
If you mean to take the train, don't
try to take the station, too.
What some people are seeking Is SEN
sation, rather than salvation.
There is a good deal of difference be-
tween giving up and giving out.
The hearts reservations are the linn
itatiOns of the life's usefulness.
Forgiveness of sin is the first step |;
full freedom from it, the final one.
There is too much borrowing of the
cruise which goes for bearing the Cross.
Salvation is not only to be relieved
of our faults, but to receive Gods
forces.
The Sermon on the Mount Is just
as truly dOctrinal as the Epistle to
the Romans.
The man who cannot put the steam
on the brakes as well as on the driv-
ers will have trouble.
The well of salvation which is turn
ed inside out for display will not hold
many refreshing draughts.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

Even lawyer objects to being croo.
Questioned By his wifA
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

A New York physician recommends
that members Of society fly kites loi
their health. He was smart enough "
suggest something that looks like pla!
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
BAD BLOOD
THE SOURCE or ALL DISEASE

Every part Of the body dependent the blood nourhment
purity and rshnes: we are assured Of health
the body weak impure system is
its strength disease collect and the manifested
Pusula erupons pnpes rashes
show that the blood In cono,on q result
much acid OF the irritating
he result q morbid unhealthy matter In the blood Rheuasm
1laa, Blood Poison. etc. all seated ha
tna VIII commune % long the aA
These impurities and poisons End their
inactive condition OF the and T.
m q Ana DGd vast; leaves the refuse s
the circulation Coming il contagious
notnsr cause r the poisoning the
microbes OF Malaria lungs and
sufficient quantity becomes carrier q Instead 81 health
ere % g to inherit bad blood paps ds
dssss e anessso1. s haadd do. e them and they e
and until this vital auid = csed pfed the body
suder For blood thls Saracer the b.
remedy discovered down az
and III poisc supplies the hssful pre nesds and compe
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07

Steam yachts were never cheaper,
says the Boston Herald. Just our LUCE
when fashion DEGREES that balloonlns
is the proper caper.
The San Juan islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1898-1914, 1908-03-07
TRUMPET CALLS
Rams Horn Sounds Warming Note
to the Unredeemed.

Love ls the fam
lily Xix e n e S. OF
heaven.
DOct rine and
dogma are direct
~ different.
The per SO n a !
ideal is the only
powerful one.
God requi r e 8
our persons before
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10
"Raiderdash!"

An illustration OF the manners OF
critics in bygone days Is furnished by
a scathing notice once printed concern
ing a volume of Browning's poems. It
was an early volume. and Browning
was delighted 70 receive letter from
]. S. Mill proposing to write a notice
Of them in the Westminster Review.
few days later his expectations were
dashed by hearing from Mr.. Mill that
he could not write the article, as he
had been forestalled by notice which
had appeared in the Westminster Re-
view itself. With palpitating heart
Browning rushed to his club and
searched the pages Of the Westmin-
ster Review. to find. to his dismay, the
article which had robbed him Of Mr..
Mills notice. 1t was to this effect:
"a volume Of poems by Browning
balderdash!'
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10

Our Language Is So Explicit!
The tradesman had rendered his bill
waited a month and then wrote:
please, sir, want my BILL
Back came the bill with these words
Certainly: here it is
The bill was returned. and in a
month the tradesman again wrote:
kindly send me the amount Of my
BILL
And the answer came promptly and
politely:
Certainly; it is $lO4.o6."
The third month the tradesman again
wrote:
Twill you send me check for the
amount of my bill?"
The answer came, with a blank. IN
signed check:
"Certainly: here is the check. | have
kept the amount Of your BILL
The fourth month the tradesman
wrote:
II want my bill paid
And the answer came back. $50
do t.
Then the tradesman gave it up.--La-
dies Home Journal
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10

The great orators have not been the
most fortunate aspirants for the presi-
dency. Webster. Clay. Douglas and
Blaine were idolized by their follow
ers, not only for their abilities and
personal traits, but also for their per-
suasive powers Of speech. Horace
Greeley. candidate Of the Democrats
and Liberal Republicans in 1872, was
not nota bic orator, but was none the
less an effective talker He made 4
speaking tour in the latter part Of the
campaign, and, although his position
was an anomalous one. he acquitted
himself with credit. even il he was
overwhelmingly defeated. Tilden, who
in his free soil days made speeches,
obtained his mastery by his pen, not
by his tongue. Grant. who was called
the silent man because he could not
make a speech when he first became a
candidate. learned to speak very we'll
in public. his speech for Garfield in
1880 being a good example OF his de-
velopment ia that direction. Boston
Globe
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10
Oyster Shells as Medicine.

Ground oyster shells were given by
the medieval doctors to children suf-
fering from ricketts, and scrofula. Now
1t appears that they were right. The
shells contain lime. nitrogen, iron, sui
phur. manganese. magnesia. -four, bro
mide, phosphoric acid and iodine, all
excellent for feeble children. They say
that if growing children were to take
powdered oyster shells in their food
the teeth would be improved.-I.on-
don Answers
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10
The Barrel on the Sidewalk.

A barrel stood on the sidewalk, ana
beside ii stood a man. The man was
dressed in laborers clothes aud appar-
emily was in quandary about how to
get the barrel to one Of the upper
floers. He scratched his head and pom
dered. and meanwhile a crowd began to
gather
rig up derrick and hoist it by
hand" suggested one man with clay
pipe in his mouth.
The man beside the barrel made no
response.
Get rope and pulley and hitch a
horse to the rope. That'll get the thing
up in Jig time suggested another.
The man remained silent.
why in the dickens doesn't he put it
on the temporary elevator and take it
up that way?" asked the man with red
whiskers
Il know better way than that"
said the man with patches on his
trousers. just rig up hoatswain's
outfit, and the thing can be hauled up
quick as wink
Suddenly the man beside the barrel
took a red bandanna handkerchief from
his pocket. wiped his forehead. took
chew Of tobacco, put the barrel on
his shoulder and carried it up to the
second floor
The barrel was empty.-Mn waukee
Free Press.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10

that my mother and | have suffered
some losses | did not give you the
details For full details apply to Mr..
Mortimer. if you can find him. The
police have been unable to do 81, The
reason why | did not tell you was
that | should have had to lay before
YOU another character precisely like
that of your friend who tried to de-
fraud you 1t seemed to me that the
spectacle would not be beneficial. but
now it cannot harm YOU"
Not in the least" said be- There
are all kinds Of men aud women. and
most Of them try to do right a fair
share of their time"
speaking Of nerves" said sue after
a brief pause. Il thies my own would
be the better for some good resolves
| have just learned of an odd thing
that | did which shows loose wheel
in my mental machinery somewhere.
| wrote to some photographers In Car
lingford TO send copies OF certain
picture for which i sat while there,
and | inc!osed to them one Of my lat
est photographs taken here A men,
her of the firm happened to be coming
to this city. and he brought my pic
ture back TO me and received the one
that had meant to send"
Mr. Jones:" said Clavering. ooh,
yes. He rrounced me seundly At bill
iards last evening"
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-10

to him was a lie and that the simplest
acts were prompted by treacherous
motives.
Even his personal appearance had
suffered in the struggle. He was lean
and haggard. There was deep line
down the middle of his forehead. and
he had lost a part of that peculiar
grace Of attitude and gesture which
had once distinguished him.
In the freight, however lie looked
more like himself, and Muriel, who
had never seen him before the days
Of his trouble and therefore could not
miss what was gone from him, was
deeply sensible of the charm that still
remained.
Do you remember a Miss Winston 2"
said he. Il met her today. Her father
had some business with me. and she
came with him to my Office"
II do not remember her" said Mu-
rieI
She merely met you once at some
social affair in Carlingford about two
years ago She said yOn lived there.
/ didn't know it,"
Mother and ! lived there for a time
hot very long Then we went abroad
and on our return came here"
II have heard that it was a pretty
place. Did you like it,
"Carlingford:" said she: Il liked it
hat I Ii
of it."
You have unpleasant memories?''
Yes"
The devil that was in Claverings
nerves awOke at this. He could not
have told why he wished to know
what those unpleasant memories were
but he was conscious of craving.
Doubtless you have friends there"
said he aud knew not why.
None said she. Il have forgotten
that Carlingford exists. Please do not
remind me-
She spoke with an earnestness which
was clear enough to Clavering's sharp-
ened wits. although he tried to veil it
What secret lay behind her wish to
AVOID TINS subject even in her own
thoughts? She had given him always
the most charming impression of
frankness and good faith 1t was that
which had won his heart. weary of de-
ceptions and treachery. And eat he
now perceived that she hadN ,l,Ien 4
whole year Of her life 1t seemed al
most like 81 trick that she Shnrld have
spoken like herself, SO unreSer,etIly. of
her romantic school girl dreams. of the
attentions she had received abroad of
everything indeed except this single
passage this year at Carlingford
What could have happened there:
He had strength enough to keep such
thoughts out Of the center Of his mind
but be had acquired recently a habit
81 double thinking. 1t was becoming