The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-11-13
DRIFTWooD

| -l | DRIFT OOD
 Mozart composed a minuet when he l was 3 years of age. However, we know babies much younger than that 1 who hand out original tunes Tn sneet 1 music form from the sheets every | A St. Louis man claims that Moses was a Democrat. This being true. we presume Ananias was 2 Republican. Savannah is turning up her nose at the rest of the world because she Is. there, We aren't surprised: that much gasoline ts enough to make any town turn up her nose. Lobsters near the coast are selling at x5 cents a dozen, LoDsters. anoth- CT variety, however, feel cheaper than that every aisht right here In Mont gomery. The next exciting serial in the daily Rapers will be the Hains Brothers. One of the most violent London suf- fragettes :s named Miss Dove. What's in name anyhow?
  only I tSlns sr sri s sver Elssss estcRss Sss that way is husband. saaas about aa ths tfsoaSisa s 11sP1aa the isS Bsi Sure. Nora. veg hoy it wrons--the trouble is in me shist." When man becomes great after ne n1arrfess all the women say 1t was due to his wtfe's efforts, otherwise he wouldn't have been anything.
 Lst's. revise the joke about the tarin going to be revised.
 Up in Maine.
 We these hunting stories hear. Isn't Eur6, So he shoots you for deer,
 TIsn't strange
 When In range, To be taken for a bird,
 Or hare.
 Or bear.
 Or a squirrel, how absurd
 Oh, it's fun. With your gun
 And Ts.. your bullets and tyonr purss1 AS some one rides in hearse. It is said that the cannibal tribes :. of Africa have eaten 2,764 missionaries during the last hundred years, and not wfthstanding this Teddy is going to face s, o1s ,sn ,,la ,nnfineshingIy: ne M When they ever; mebbe they'll weaken. code?
 Why do all old fashioned photo- graphs of bride and groom always look like they were standing up to be There Is absolutely no comfort what ever to g homely woman in telling her that beautiful disposition is more to De admired than beautiful face. Now that hips have gone out of style @ i@snt runny how many women didn't nave S"y'
 Silence IS indicative of wisdom. and Is said to be golden, but we can as- sure you that 1t is often times onI- When you've money to burn
 Your friends will turn On every hand to treat you.
 But when you are broke
 This is no joke.
 Its different way they'll treat you. 4 Baltimore man won twenty-seven hats on the election. If they were all green hataghe can save lem for a St Patrjcks Day parade for himself and friends In March: When the Children Have Gone Away, The old folks sit and sigh. Missing their childish play, Missing the things they say. t And they wonder, wonder why 
 Why do we miss them so. When the little tin swords ali rust, When the iiEtle toy drums ali dust, After they older grow. When the children have gone away, Out in the world of chance. Often the mother cries. Heartbroke, as she once more spies. The first little pair of pants. When the children have gone away. They know not the hearts that yesrn. They know not the word of prayer, Guiding them safely there. . And some of them hen don't return. what We Get for Running a Blonde Column.
 Montgomery Nov. 10. Mir. Driftwood Armstrong:
 am very much interested In your column. I always turn to iJ and the Society Page. But shouldn't you be
  Hasn't 1t ever occurred tp you to deify poetically grey eyes and brown ones?
 Grey Eyes.
 Montgomery. Nov II. Dear Drift--You state that The lowest prices are not always in the basement of the store, Neither are the highest priced flats reached by an elevator. Brown Eyes"
 Montg9rnery Nov. Il. Driftwood-- By yo4f columns we judge that you think no girls worthy of mention except the blue-eyed ones Kindly tell us would you want to be the cause of our becoming jealous
 Two Browp-Eyed Girls"
 Back at Drift. Drift Armstrong advises that If you mean business wear a business suit when calling upon a girl. On this basis, a young man naturally would be a bit chary of calling in a frock coat lest he intended marrying the girl. San Antonio Express.
 The giraffe has a tongue thirteen inches long, but there are some women in this town that can make a giraffe look like a piker, says Drift Arm strong. That's competition. -St. Louis