Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-09-20
PARADOX OF THE RIDE
All Officers Finish Test-Yet
One Is Missing.
ARMY LOSES 1870 POUNDS
Advertisement-But Grant Asks No
Searching Party.
DUSTY BRIGADE AT THE END
Enough Virginia Real Estate Car
ried Into Fort to Make
New Ramparts.
ARMY LOSES 100 POUNDS
DUSTY BRIGADE AT THE END

Somewhere in virginia, hundred ana
eighty pounds Finder please return to Maj. Gen.
l'red Grant commander OF the Departmcnt Of
rue East. wro will attend 10 its distribution, pro
lata. among forty army omceTs
II all the detritus, cellular and adj
pose tissue. cuticle. epidermis and
derma mater could be collected from
along the route of the test ride that
finished at Fort Myer yesterday the
United States Army would be the richer
by one highly efficient officer.
All of the forty officers came back,
but there was a hiatus somewhere
There had been one member or his
equivalent left by the way, for the
command averaged four and a half
pounds lighter to the man than when it
started. Forty times four and one-half
ponnds-the lost 1so-would make at
least one good sized man. or almost two
the size of Gen. Funston.
All Back Same Day.
The officers all came back the same
day. This much was expected when the
ambulance drove into the post empty
about 1890 am.
There were eager inquiries concerning
the whereabouts of the officers and the
driver. waving an arm toward the state
OF Louisiana. said: "Oh. there or there
abouts. We vas in a hurry so we walked
back
Undoubtedly the forty were ''out there
somewhere but they were long time
crossing the finish line. Most folks about
the post got tired waiting, and If the race
had ended during the noon hour there
would have been no one on hand TO cheer
the first or even the second under the
wire. Some time after O'Clock there
were signs of violent agitation on top of
the fort water tank, but only the initiated
could know that the lookout was wig
vagging headquarters that there were
the southwest.
Brings Rainfall to City.
More minutes passed, and then the
clouds were plainly visible to the watch
ers on the ground. Hours afterward the
whole sky over Washington was overcast.
and flashes OF lightning and rolling thun-
der surprised the city dwellers. and
right smart shower descended. But
mighty few people even guessed that the
disturbance of the elements could be
traced 10 a tired band of United States
Army men who kicked up most of the
dust in Virginia finishing the last of
ninety-mile test ride.
To the crowd which gathered around the
column when the horses stopped and the
riders made more or less graceful mo-
tons indicating dismounting, it was evil
dent more OF the sacred soil of Virginia
was concentrated in Fort Myer than had
ever before been centered In that bulwark
Of the capitals defenses.
ScraperS. busters and a broom brigade
worked inlustriously during the remainder
of the afternoon. finally restoring the vet
Grams OF the ninety-mle campaign to a
semblance of normal appearance. No or
ders have yet been issued for the utiliZa-
ton of the imported soil in adding to the
lines OF notifications about the post.
Everybody in Good Spirits.
Everybody was in good spirits at the
doubt about Gen. Grant. He was as hard
as finishing nails TO start with, having
done some 500 miles Of saddle work this
season.
There was a corps of surgeons N wait
ing at the hospital for the returned prod
gals. There was minute examination
made Of ali the victims, and the results.
comprising pulse. temperature, weight
and respiration. were all tabulated. and
Will get as far as the second assistant to
the surgeon general or the third assist
ant to the chief clerk of the War Depart
me1t.
1t is doubtful if they will get any
further before turning aside to add to
the mass OF historic waste paper that iy
daily making a hall OF public records a
more urgent necessity. However, if Il
iiastsns that day the owners OF availa bic
building sites may rest happy and the
great test ride from Fort Myer will not
ave been ridden in vain.