Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1908-07-15

asked, as he rested against the counter
prepared to steal a few minutes of the
boss's time.
Took Queenie to the ball game yester-
day, that's all. Talk about your dense
fogs. Queenie's got the diamond
studded belt when it comes to being
the original doughhead. l tried to
wise her up going out on the car, but |
it wasn't any use.
If there's anything you don't grasp |
about this game wait till you get
home. I told her. '1'll draw you
diagram after the game. Don't show
me up by asking lot of dippy ques-
tons in the grandstand.
:" All right, she replied.
''We take seats in = the grandstand.
'Tain't nothing like l thought it would
be-. she pipes. Who is that man way
over yonder?'
" That's the center fielder
What does he do?'
Catches f1ies.'
"'Are there many flies out there
where he is?'
Sometimes
=" i don't see him. catching any,
8" Why don't he get busy?'
He will soon as the batter knocks
one out there
Now smarty, if you think came
out here to be ridiculed by you,
you're mistaken. You can't tell me
they can knock a fly that far. Besides
that man with the club has to defend
himself all the time or that man will
hit him with the ball. The rascal
threw three times right at his head. If
he hits him just hope that he will
take that club and hit him. See there
he just threw another one at him.
What does he get if he gets hit
with the ball?'
80 A base.'
What? One of those whitewashed
sofa pillows?'
| 'Uh-huh.
They've only got four of them.
What do they do when they give those
four away? Get some more?'
'Yes'm.'
Now, smarty, he did hit that poor
man. l wouldn't let HIM hit me for a
leather sofa pillow. let alone one of
those cheap ones
Then l missed three good plays ex-
planning to her that the guy was hit by
pitched ball and was permitted to
take first.
" Why didn't he run down this
way she asks pointing to the third.
The others the closest
No it isn't. Same distance.
g 1t looks the closest any way
Isn't
What are you whooping about?'
" Gle Beck just stole second.
Z" It's still there
"All the gang close to me was pop.
ping the sides laughing.
Get out, you shrimp, he was safe
mile, yells.
Who you calling shrimp?
Queenie butts in.
% The umpire
What did he do?'
Called Beckley out.
Well, Mr.. Beckley's big enough
to fight his own battles. You needn't
be calling the umpire names.
Look out, you bonehead. Keer
awake down there l whoops.
Who's asleep?"
a. The guy on first
= He is not. / just saw him move.
"Can you beat that? Imagine your
; self trying to explain double steal
felder's choice, a sacrifice hit or the
5 squeeze play to that kind of talent.
!; 1t was funny at first and then it go
tiresome. I got sore and left in the
, sixth inning. Missed the only no-hi
: game ever pitched in Kansas City"
THAT was touch luck, sure, thu
waiter said, got new girl and I'm
thinking of taking her out. She's
never been to game"
= "Well, if you think she's differen
\ from all other women that's swell
way to find out that she amt"
''How did Queenie like the gamer
' 80 she thought it was great"
! :" I'll know more about it next time
D | I go she said.
' .It's a cinch she will if she waits
for me to take her. Freck said as he
4 climbed off the stool.
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