davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
ALTERNATING CURRENTS.
From the Chicago Record Herald.
MAS REGRET.

HAS AEUhEIs
Since pa has lost 'his job the joys We
had have all departed
Ma mopes around and you can see that
she is heavy hearted;
She's cut out bridge. and It. Of course, is
not at ali surprisin'
That we amt dom much just now. ex-
cept ec0nomizin'.
Pa SAYS it wouldn't be so bad If ma had
only needed
And saved little when she had so much
more than she needed;
The girls are still al home in spite Of all
ma did 10 make EN-
So sweet the fellows she'd picked out
would simply have to take 'em.
It's awful gloomy round the place since
pa don't have % hurry
Away from breakfast any more. we don't
do much but NOTIFY.
Madge sets around and fTets all day. and
so do Bess and Certie;
She seems TO take 1t hardest. though. be-
cause she's nearly thirty.
When pa was scoldiu ma last night be
cause she'd been short-sighted
He spoke as though he'd lost his job Just
so that she'd be spited,
But ma spanked up at last and said.
You'd spoil saints endurance.
And you're so healthy, too. with such a
lot Of life insurance
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

From the Portland Telegram.
The difficulty which. according to Holy
Writ, a rich man experiences in getting
into heaven is as nothing compared with
the difficulty of getting him into the Jail
when he deserves II.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
Enforced Patriotism

From the Cleveland Leader.
The most patriotic Of the founders Of
the Standard oil Company never dreamed
that the concern would be employed some
day at paying of the national debt
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
L. This True9

when a dog with bad name" re-
marked the grocery philosopher, 'eyentu-
ally succeeds--'
Say the rest of it,"
"It is shorely a sad sad blow 10 that
community"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

From the Pruvidenoe Journal
The identity of certain malefactors OF
great wealth" may perhaps be discovered
at last by a process Of elimination. The
head of the steel trust has taken lunch
con at the White House and is conse-
quently absolyed from all suspicion.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

According to the cable. Clumsy. as
usual said the Queen to King Edward,
who is said to have stepped on the train
Of her dress as they entered the House of
Lords TO open Parliament. D your
dress" retorted the King. Who said Ed
ward is mollycoddle?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
whaye Weight Counts

From the Louisville Courier Journal.
Mr.. Jefferson Davis has refused TO ap-
pear in Eight vaudeville at SS000 a
week. Wise is the shoemaker who sticks
to his last. Mr. Davis has prospered in
heavy vaudeville.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
The Worm, Turns-

Shave yourself sometimes. don't your
inquired the barber with a superior air.
No, sir answered the man in thc
chair. Il got these hacks ia a frst-ciass
barber shop right here in this town"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

An Indiana minister says there are nine
teen different and distinct kinds of hades.
but almost any Ohio politician Is willing
to swear just now that there are at least
ten times that many.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

From the New Orleans Times Democrat.
Whatever may be his faults. J. Pier
pont Morgan is a builder. not a wrecker-
which is more than can be said of most
of his critics.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
HarrIman's View of the Law.

From the Atlanta Constitution
It seems to be the opinion of Hartman
that the law is all right in It's place
meaning the place to which he assigns it.
occasionally
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
Retire the Dog.

From the Philadelphia Public ledger
Fuss over an officers dog seems likely
to lead TO retirement of the officer from
the army. Why not retire the dog in
stead?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

"A Pennsylvania man was wooed, won,
and married within less than an hour"
says the Norfolk Virginian-Pilot. Evil
IDENTIFY, g. Pennsylvania man stands no
more show with some Of the women
in that province than the average Texan
stands with one Of the Houston Post s
red-headed and dimpIed widows.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

An Englishman figures that the johann
nesberg gold mines are good for SIS. 0e0. :
000.o00 If an Englishman can get that
out of them, no telling what Mr. Harri-
man could work them for
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

The idea that Opportunity knocks but
once at mans door, and that rather
timidly. viii not DO. it seems. According
10 the anti-Bryan press, Opportunity is
pounding on Mr.. Bryan's front door with
a baseball bat. and has been for quite a
while. Strange, however, that the neigh
bors do not appear to notice the racket.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
fn Eve for Business.

An / for business is the thing.
The crowd
WIN patronize the men who sing
Out loud
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
CAPITOL GOSSIP.

Representative Joseph Warren Keller.
OF Ohio, and Uncle joe Cannon are
the old boys Of the House. and they are
alike in that their age does not show It
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

tt is said the Earl of Yarmouth will
not resist his wife's plea Of divorce. pro
vided he is paid q million dollars We
should imagine not, In fact. there isn't
any doubt in our mind that his lord
ship would do any old thing for a million
dollars
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

Congressman McGavin wants to tax
imported bridegrooms as poultry" says
the Philadelphia North American. Well,
some Of them are pretty tough old roos-
ters, and that's a fact.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

Is Mr. Jacob Riis' loyalty disinte-
grating? First It was another term in
the White House. and now it is mayor
OF New York. VIII it yet get to be chief
of police at oyster Bay or justice of the
peace at Pine Knot?
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
A BeIIe's Woes.

Ma made me accept him"
He has lots Of money"
Il know: but It's pretty hard to have
to marry the only man in your set you
have never loved
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

You will have greatness thrust upon
you declared the fortune teller
''On the first ball0t?' asked the large
fat gentleman, with hopeful smile.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

South Cardinals legislature has passed
a bill in the lower house prohibiting the
carrying of pistols weighing less than
twenty pounds. That's a shot at the
pistol-toter that ought to prove effective.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

A Tennessee paper prints an article
about "old Bob Taylor" being a ''pious
fraud" and a 'cheap-skate politician"
It's very exciting, and reads like a Sher-
lock Holmes romance. until you get near
" through and discover it is all about
some fellow who halls from Iowa and
wants to be bailiff or something.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
Naturally.

a skating party is a good place TO get
acquainted. Young people are thrown to-
geiher"
''Yes2"
And that often breaks the ice"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
Musical Reformers.

From the Detroit News
IF Roosevelt is the national Him" as
Puck suggests, Tom Lawson must be its
ragtime
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

There IS this advantage about living In
d prohibition "deestrict;' you are able to
view the fluctuations in the champagne
market with undismayed eye
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

plain. hard. intelligent toll is the great
est result-getter yet revealed TO man. "
says the Richmond Dispatch. the
paper that organized the Photographers
Ulion. and is now sorry for It.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

King Edward has Parliament on his
hands which, after all, is perhaps better
than Parliament having King Edward on
its hands.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

He radiates sunshine says Senator
Tillman of Mr.. John d. Rockefeller. That
disqualfies him for the lecture platform
nothing but the radiation of hot air goes
there
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

An elderly lady passed away in Iowa
recently wh0 once refused to marry
Abraham Lincoln; she said. however.
that she might have accepted him had
he asked her the second time. This
should be solemn warning 20 girls who
are slow about making up their minds.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31
Al Last.

"At last" said the ambitious young
novelist I have written something that
think will be accepted by the first maya
zine 1t is sent to
What is it," his friend asked
"A check for a years subscription"
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

\ Florida postmaster refuses to get out
although the Senate has rejected his NOM
inatioH. Evidently his faith in the Prov
ess of the Big Stick is unlimited.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

Mr.. Justice Holmes appears TO make
something Of a specially of dissenting
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1908-01-31

Six years will see the completion of the
Panama Canal. according TO J. G. I<ratz,
who is employed along the big ditch. and
is on a visit here, where he is registered
at the Cochran.
"The job will be completed in six years.
and is being done il a way no other ma
ton in the world could duplicate" said
Mr. Kratz enthusiastically. Recently
severa! big contractors in New York
ridiculed the assertion that 100000 yards
of earth were being removed per month.
They said it was impossible. It is abso-
iutely true. nevertheless.
I'VE have the finest living in the land.
We have two big ice plants club houses,
cold storage accommodations, telephones,
telegraph. a railroad with more rolling
stock per mile than any other in the
country, good hotels. and everything but
n gymnasium, which is under way now
This is all very wonderful But when you
consider that American science and In
genuity has stamped out yellow fever alb
sOlutely by killing every mosquito. you
viii understand what has been accom-
plished. Last year only four white men
died in the zone. There are fewer mos
quitoes there than there are in Wash
ington in the summer and sall
Mr.. Kratz declared that no trouble was
expected from the adjoining republics.
In Panama there are 100000 men. he said
but they have been completely captfvated
by the ability and agility of the Ameri-
cans, and would not think Of starting a
revolution OF any kind On the zone there
are 5000 white men. 20,o00 alien employees.
and an army Of dark men,
The government has d railroad on the
canal" said Mr.. Kratz. which will pay
big money as soon as the canal is built.
This road has $50 locomotives, although
II is but forty-nine miles long. It is dou-
ble-tracked most OF it's length We are
hauling what commercial freight comes
our way now, but are not seeking il. The
railroad was built for work on the canal
primarily
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
Mnnrrn
Gtttzftt Hlrtr
BY REV. WILLIAM CARDAM.
Detroit.

characterize would disposed that the
gains modern life would make life itself very much larger richer
that tho modern citizen would shed much of the militant nsuar citizen
ship the past and would stand for something like universal citizen
ship
and encments of life have wrought copond-y larger
0 larger citizenship.
Our modern citizenship neither broad generous enght
errd propoonae the general enlightenment and
chment of the world live in Indeed marked phase and quality
presena life rather
and hatred The Hague conference concluding has revealed
this The modern principle Of the of naval and military
There Of the modern world
and these the advanced who keep the closest and jealous
each the other and if of these powers lays down battp
the Others Immediately proceed lay down bigger Germany
nsua nationally nsuar. Armed to the teeth she has her
abroad and her machines trained the finest readiness Ger
many German the and sleeps she sleeps ALL "A her
this France of Russia and $50 England
Notwithstanding her wide empire Of colonies The United States has had
peculiar training in broad citizenship and yet have coined IN
of all national cries. any country Right
wrong counyn The trade policies OF the world to-day indicate
the narrowing and limiting Of the content of modern citizenship
immediate time expressed the alarming phrase
oThe yellow peril" is a revelation of this thing
The greatest peril of the modern world hardened and hard
and threatening ways in the life tie trade The politics and the
religion of this modern life OF all nations the United States is
and least hamped either by tradition geographical crowdng
this world of time excellent way The best
citizenship found in hardened militant nonam, but in the
recognition that Gods world very big world and that there
and liberty and safety for every man.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10

Bailey of Texas, against the Aldrich
currency bill. Mr.. Bailey declares
that the banks--the New York banks
- We're responsible FOR the late panic
through overuse of credits; and eoun
try banks We're open to criticism for
keeping so much money on deposit
with New York banks He points out
that the big banks refused to come to
the rescue of the country by taking
out more currency under the banking
law, preferring to issue clearing
house certificates because these were
cheaper and easier 10 retire. He
would compel banks to invest part of
their surplus in state county and
mrnicipal bonds. He would not per
nit them to issue their notes without
interest and without security as the
Aldrich bill would permit them to do.
The gist of his speech Is given else
where in this paper.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
| CAIRO IN 1866
Observation-Disclosures,

DR. n. r. Casey of Mound City. was
nominated for state representative at
a district convention held in Cairo on
Sept, Goth.
On, the same evening Col. T. Lyle
Diekey Democratic candidate for con
gressman-at-iarge addressed large
audience at the court house.
A dispatch from Memphis on Sept.
2Gth reported SO new cases of cholera
there and nine deaths in "a hours.
DR.. ,Dunning who had just returned
from Memphis reports the cholera al
most entirely confined to the negroes.
A match game OF baseball was
played on Sept goth between the In
dependents and the Egyptians. local
clubs. The former won by a score of
81 to %. These clubs were com
posed principally of professional and
business men.
Fox, Howard & Co. have completed
the filling of Commercial avenue,
Second street and Tenth street. The
filling of Washington avenue from
Tenth street north will next be COM
menced to allow the contractor to put
in the sewer south Of Tenth street.
7 On. Oct. End the Monitor baseball
club, Of Mound City came down and
defeated the Cairo Egyptian club by
a. score of G5 to &c. j. W Morris.
then Of Mound City. acted as umpire.
Time 3 hours and IS minutes In the
evening the Egyptians entertained
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
HinuranhY.

Wright Lorimer, an actor who in re-
cent years has wen much fame by his
presentation of the biblical drama.
The Shepherd King was born in
the town of Aathol, Mass, March 10
1874. After completing a prepare.
tory course in the Worcester Academy
he attended Colgate University and
later spent several years in study al
Oxford University, England. After his
return to the United States he was
offered the professorship in English
literature and Psychology in several
universities. but these he declined t.
fellow his stronger inclinations to en-
ter the dramatic field. He made his
debut in a minor part at the Dear
born Theater in Chicago. After serv,
ing his apprenticeship he decided 70
star at the head of his own COMPANY
He met with almost immediate sue
cess and in "The Shepherd King" he
has been seen in nearly every city o.
prominence in America.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
NEWS OF Tx SCHOOLS

Stronghurst's siX-room school build
Ing was totally destroyed by fire on
February 10.
The summer session of the state
university will open June 10 and con
tinue nine weeks.
princeton township high school
collected $4,000 last year in tuition
from outside pupils,
Seyentythree classes We're dis
missed in one day in Chicago schools
because Of the teacher famine.
Bradley Polytechnic Institute viii
receive 100000 from the esate of its
founder, Mrs. Lydia Bradley.
Andrew Cornegie oFers Monmouth
college $4,000 to replace its burned
buildings, if $4,000 be raised else
where.
Knox college has issued an elegant
bulletin, containing many
half-tone illustrations pertaining to
the college and the city of Galesburg.
The gradute school of the state
was opened by appropriate
exercises February and 5. Prot
William f. NJ. Goss was installed as
dean OF the College of Engineering at
he same meeting,
Bum school, Springfield Miss
Ninna B. Ravens, principal holds thr
worlds record for punctuality There
vas not a case Of hardness among It's
100 pupils during three Of the five
aonths ending with January and only |
i've minutes during the other two
months.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
lime CARD CAIRO ELEcIalr RYA

BELf LIME cars due to leave second st. no
ing north ON Commercial Ave-, every Is MN
utes from 9 y. IN. to ii p. IN.
Going north ON Walnut ~. every is minute
from sos q IN, to 1885 .. M.
POPLAR ST. LINE Holbrook Ave, car
10 leave Second ~. geing nerth on Hoinroo
Ave, Al b:b7; 6.27; G:s2; 6:5?; 7:I2 a. L. aud os
same minutes every hour until 1882 and II i.
.. III.
Going west on Twenty Eighth ST. at 81 .,
o;l8 $780, 6;isi and 1904 ". m and on same Iaii.
utes every boar until 1884 aud l1;04 .. IN.
Poplar St ears due to pass st. MAYS pArh
Is minutes after leaving Second ST.
BELT LINE OWL OARS north on Walnut
1850 p. m. 1884 II. m; 80 a. M; l:Bu .. M,
$50 a. MI 4 80 a. M; 8 80 n. IN.
North on Commercial l2;OO p. M. 100
N. % n. M, 800 a. m. no A, III. o q. IN.
Belt and Owl ears are due to pass Wes
thirty fourth vt. Is minutes after Leaving
second ST,
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10

II may be presumed that Uncle
Joe" Cannons aversion to noises
which is shown BY his membership IL
the "anti-noise club, does not extend
to he Cannon boom" But he would
not have much of kick coming" to
him on that score, If all the noises
that go to make up his boom are like
that made by the Alexander county
Republican central committee, whose
endorsement OF their Uncle Joe" In.
stead of being Walter Warder
roar, dwindles away into Sidney b"
whisper under the influence of the
rousirs boost given to Roosevelt. But.
seriously Speaking. Alexander county
Republicans. more especially Cairo
Republicans, make a mistake In en-
Joe Cannon for president at
all. President Roosevelt. or any man
that President Roosevelt wants, is
entitled to the unanimous and hearty
of Cairo and Alexander
county Republicans. Roosevelt has
done too much for Cairo to be for
gotten and whether Speaker Cannon
has ever done anything or may ever
10 anything for us or not, it must BE-
always held as Of small consequence
beside the lasting and farreaching
benefits that have come and will com
% our city because of October ,. 1907
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
Alligator in Church.

The alligators are getting bad at
ireenEillo, 5. G., and are even taking
he pools Of the Baptist churches as
places OF refuge. A five-foot alliga'
Tor was found in the pool of the Bap.
list church. The saurian was discov.
'red by plumber who waded into
he pool for the purpose of repairing
/ leak, and he WAC scared out of a
years growth, as well as out OF the
water.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10

Thousands of American women
in our homes are daily sacrificing
their lives to duty.
In order to keep the home neat
and pretty, the children well dressed
and tidy, women overdo. A female
weakness or displacement is often
brought on and they suffer in silence,
drifting along from bad to worse,
knowing well that they ought to
have help to overcome the pains and
aches which daily make life a burden.
1t is to these faithful women that
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
MARCH 10, IN HISTORY.

l624-England declared war on Spain.
f62s--Third parliament of Charles !
dissolved.
English soldiers plundered Bos
ton
1896 British parliament passed Irish
insurection act.
1797-Albany became the capital OF
the state OF New York.
1Sf5-Alexander Ill of Rpssia born.
Died Nov /, 1894
1SG3-Albert Edward. Prince of Wales,
married to Princess Alexandra
of Denmark.
1SG7-Attempted assassination Of
King Victor Emmanuel at Milan
1S70-First woman jury in America
assembled in Wyoming.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
Unique New York Lot.

The only lot in the older part OF
New York city which has never had
a house on 1t is a plot G0x9O at the
northeast corner of Eighth avenue ana
Fifty-siXth street.
Like Our Agricultural Implements.
Agricultural implements of Amer.
lean manufacture have a firm foot.
hold and lead the imports of such ar.
ticles in Cuban markets.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
King Edwards Lucky Number.

King Edwards lucky number is 9.
Both his parents were born in 1919:
he was born on a 9Th; his marriage
took place In the year 'e3, which
numbers added the one to the other
make 8; his reign commenced In
1901; he was to have been crowned
on the 27th, which figures added to-
gether make 9; and he was actually
crowned on August s.-London Tat
Ter.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
Modern Greece,

Greece is an isolated country of %.
S4l square miles that supports popu-
iation of some 100000 people and has
foreign trade of about $4,000, 600
year. 1t has no railroad connection
with any other country. and being cut
off from the rest of Europe by the
mountains of Turkish Macedonia on
the north. all commerce is by sea-
Consular Reports.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
Houses andtHan,as

There have been, and there are to.
day In the various lands Of the earth,
many people who have no houses, and
nothing that You could call furniture,
even OF the antique variety. But there
can be no doubt that thev are far hap
pier than many who are comfortably
housed in mansions which contain
everything that money can buy
Uncle Remus' Magazine.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10
The PRIVILEGE of Ace,

One OF the few advantages OF In.
creasing years lies In the conscious
ness that we shall one day be able to
give advice instead of receiving it.
No one would dare advise a man Of so,
unless II might be his wife. in which
case he would not listen to her, while
the person who would think of advis-
ing a woman Of 10 does not exist
Ladies Field.
The Cairo bulletin., 1908-03-10

Life is more than hap
pmess. 1t is not to be
considered as having val
ne save as it may grid
us better for our tasks
Fld 3 We us courage and
h.spilation in IFS activi-
ties. Living along the
line of least resistance
and Vipl1inn to inclius-