The Sauk Centre herald., 1908-07-09
PRECISION OF
LANGUAGE
By E E KElLETT
(Copyright.)


mon enemies, the masters. In stalk
ing these foes We found it much bet
ter to hunt in couples. Hoppy, con.
fess, led the way; but l was a very
skillful aide-de-camp.
I'VE don't really hate masters, as
such" said Hoppy to me one day when
we were discussing these general lines
of action; only, of course, in self-de-
tense We have to adopt basis of hos
tility." Hoppy was great at these big
words.
There must be no poisoned weap.
ons," he resumed. "A lies lie, and
we don't use it. If they hit on
precise and direct question-which
isn't often-we must tell them the
truth"
That won't trouble us much"
said. "As you say, it isn't often"
NO" he answered. "Mc of them,
fortunately, are not such sneaks. They
give you a chance. They say: Are
you talking?' when you've just fin.
ished Then, of course, you say No
A lies lie, but GRAMS only cram"
That's it," replied. Every now
and then the masters hit on precisely
the right question; and then, of course,
we answer straight"
Soon after this it happened that
Hoppy and I've were always in the
same class-were having an English
lesson with Taylor. 1t was q scratch
class; half the chaps were at drawing,
and Taylor used to give us any stuff
that came into his head. Well, any.
way, that afternoon we were standing
round, and old Fatty plunged straight
into his pitfalls.
There's man with black and
white tie,'" he said solemnly. Nov,
what does that mean?" As II it mat
tered Well, few fellows, from old
practice, spotted what he was after
and got it right. Then came a long
jaw, that bored us awfully-an ex.
cept Hoppy. You see," said Taylor,
"as it stands it means the man had
two ties, one black and the other
white. A black and white tie would
mean that he had only one, and that
partly black and partly white. Do you
see, Hopkins?'
Quite, SIR
"Ah! it seems easy at first sight,
doubtless, yet few mistakes are COM
moner. A soldier, for example, often
says: I swear on my honor as an
officer and gentleman He isn't
both an officer and gentleman; he is
both officer and gentleman. He's not
two, but one"
Hoppy's face assumed a look of
utter sheepish stupidity which no one
but a really clever boy could have
put on.
But, sir"-hesitatingly and with
great depreciation of manner-"aren't
you schoolmaster and gentleman"
''Not both"-he paused for a mo-
ment-1 mean, not two things. or
course, in sense l am both-that is,
to be precise" He was beginning to
explain; but Hoppy was in on him
before he'd time to fix it up quite
straight.
Cant man be both, sir? l don't
see
Its this way" said old Fatty, with
some embarrassment. IF l were a
schoolmaster and gentleman, L
should be calling myself two persons,
just like black and a white tie"
Would they be different, sir? Why
can't you be both?" The rest of the
class, which had hitherto been taking
but languid interest in the matter,
woke up as it became plain that old
Taylor was getting flustered.
What mean is this" said old Tay-
lor, stammering bit, for he knew he
was going to be obscure, and he prided
himself on his lucidity-"that if I said
I saw schoolmaster and a gentleman
walking down the street, 1 should
mean I'd seen two persons"
Two quite different persons, sir?"
"Yes, certainly"
Then is schoolmaster something
altogether different from a gentle
man, sir?"
"Of course not. could say: "A
schoolmaster and another gentleman
walking down the street, If liked"
Then the schoolmaster would be a
gentleman, too"
"Of course he would"
But you said just now he wasn't,
SIR" said Hoppy, looking very much
puzzled.
There, that'll do," said Taylor, tes-
tily. Il can't spend all day explain.
ing
At this point, while still looking de.
murely stupid to the master, Hoppy
winked at the class, as If to say: I've
kept him at this a decent time, you
chaps, haven't II" and he looked SO
funny that first Jones, and then all the
rest of us, burst into roar of laugh
ter, and Taylor, who was cross when
he thought he was being drawn,
shrek out: "All of you do me so lines
by tomorrow morning." ! can't remem-
Der what happened afterwards; we
were all so angry with Hoppy that we
couldn't think Of anything else
At the end of the lesson l went for
him. What chump you were to get
us all that impot!'" said.