Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1908-04-07
AF|NE SIGN LANGUAGE
DroI| incident In the Reign OF
James |. OF England.
A TRICK ON AN AMBASSADOR
The Different Interpretations Of the
Same Acts Performed by a Croehety
Spaniard and a Hard Headed and
Canny Old Scotch Butcher.

1t Is said that King James |. on re-
moving To London was waited upon by
the Spanish ambassador, Il man of cru
dition. but who had crotchet In his
head that every country should have a
professor Of signs to teach him and the
like of him to understand one another.
The ambassador was lamenting one
day before the king this great desider-
atum throughout all Europe. when the
king said to him: "W'hy. have a pro-
fessor of signs In the northernmoSt col
lege IN my dominions-viz at Aber-
deen-but 1t is great way off. perhaps
600 miles"
Were It 10000 leagues Off shall
see him." said the ambassador and
am determined to set out In TWO or
three days" The king saw he had COM
mitted himself and wrote. or caused to
be written. to the University of Aber-
deem. stating the case and desiring the
professors to put him off some way or
make the best of him. The ambassa-
dor arrived. was received with great
solemnity. but soon began to inquire
which Of them had the honor to be pro-
fessOr Of signs.
Being told that the professor was
absent In the highlands and would re-
turn nobody knew when, the ambas-
salor said. 81 will walt his return.
though II were twelve months"
Seeing that this would not do and
that they had to entertain him at a
great expense all the while, they con-
trivcd a stratagem. There was one
Geordy. butcher, blind Of an eye. a
drol fellow. with much wit and rogu-
cry about him. He was got, instruct
ed to be professor Of signs, but not to
speak on pain Of death. Geordy cheer.
fully undertook the role. The ambas-
sador was told that the professor OF
signs would be at home next day, at
which he rejoiced greatly.
Next day Geordy was gowned. wig
ged and placed In Il chair OF state In
a room in the college. all the profess
ors and the ambassador being In an
adjoining room. The ambassador was
shown into Geordy's room and left to
converse with him as well rs he could,
the professors awaiting the issue with
fear and trembling.
The ambassador held up one OF his
fingers to Geordy; Geordy held up two
Of his. The ambassador held up three;
Geordy clnched his fist and looked
stern. The ambassador then took an
orange from his pocket and held 1t up;
Geordy took a piece Of barley cake
from his pocket and held that up.
After which the ambassador bowed to
him and retired to the other professor,
who anxously inquired his opinion
Of their brother.
"EIe Is a perfect miracle" said the
ambassador. II would not give him
for the wealth Of the Indies"
"Well." said the professors, ito de-
scend to particulars"
"Why," said the ambassador, Il first
held up one finger denoting that there
is one God: he held up two, signifying
that these are the Father and Son.
held up three, meaning the Father. the
Son and Holy Ghost; he clinched his
fist. to say that these three are one.
| then took out an orange. slgnifying
the goodness Of God, who gives his crea-
lures not only the necessarles, but the
luxurles, Of life. upon which the Won
| derful man presented a piece OF bread,
showing that 1t was the staff OF life
and preferable to every luxury
The professors were glad that mat
ters had turned out so well; so, having
got quit Of the ambassador, they next
got Geordy to hear his version OF the
signs.
"well, Geordy. how have you come
on and what do you think OF yon
man"
"The rascalw says Geordy. What
did he do first. think ye? He held up
one finger, as much as to say. You
have only one eye. Then | held up two,
meaning that my one eye was perhaps
MS good as both his. Then the fellow
held up three Of his fingers, to say that
there were but three eyes between US,
and then ! was so mad at the scoun-
drel that I stocked my nelve and was
to come q whack on the side OF his
head and would ha' done 1t, too. but
for your sakes. Then the rascal did
not stop with his provocation here. but,
forsooth, takes out an orange, as much
rs to say, Your poor, beggarly. cold
country cannot produce that. l show
ed him a whang of bear bannock,
meaning that did ma care farthing
for him nor his trash neither as lang's
ha' this. But, by a that's guild" con-
cluded Geordy, "Tm angry yet that
didn't thrash the hide o. the scoun'
drelv-London T. P.'s Weekly.
| The Willy Owl.