The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1908-09-22

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the house with pale cheeks and com,
pressed lips. At II o'clock the door
bell rang, and travelling clock tinker
asked II she had anything In his line
TO do. He set an obstinate clock go
Ing and collected a quarter for his
skill.
He was the man whom the husband
saw glide furtively away. You will
always read furtiveness In clock
tlnker's movements IL the sun happens
to shine on him just right,
SO It happened that neither letter
was produced to be laughed over.
There was constraint, and both hus.
band and wife felt II. They were no
longer natural In their behavior, and
that very fact aroused suspicious.
"She Is deceiving me" and "He Is
deceiving me" We're what they were
saying to themselves, and the seed
planted by the anonymous letter writ
er had taken fair root. At any mo-
ment during the next month had both
letters been produced all would have
been made plain and the situation
would have been cleared up In ten
minutes. But they were not produced.
They were treasured.
The strained relations became pain
full, but what could either doi They
could not accuse each other on an
anonymous letter. They did great
deal of thinking, however.
II so happened that both had been
engaged previous to their own engage
ment. What did Watch your wife
and you will discover" mean except
that Kitty's old lover was writing to
her, seeing her secretly, persuading
her that he could never, never love an.
other and suggesting an elopement to
a faraway isle?
The letter carrier was questioned as
to what letters he delivered at the
house. A private detective was paid
S. a day TO search the town for the
old lover. The boy that moved the
lawn was instructed to keep watch on
all life insurance and sewing machine
agents calling at the house. and the
husband began to feel himself a Sher-
lock Holmes.
Something was also done ON the 9TH
er hand. Night after night as the hus-
band lay sleeping for even jealous
husbands do sleep-a form clad in
white might have been seen going
through his pockets In search of dam
aging evidence.
His weekly visits to his Masonic
lodge had to be verified. II he went
out in the evening to order soap at the
grocery he was followed. OF course he
must In some way be in communlca-
ton with bis old love and have aban-
donment or divorce in view. Just let
him try 1t! If he ran away he should
be brought back In chains. II he ap-
piled for divorce she would fight the
case to the last court In the land.
Naturally their set noticed that some
thing was wrong, strive as the couple
might before company, but no one
knew just what was the trouble, and
for once the mutual friend did not in
terfere and make matters worse.
A more miserable couple did not ex-
ist, but no explanations were asked for
or volunteered. Anything Of the sort
would have been taken for falsehoods.
Watch your wife" and Watch your
husband were watchwords ever be.
fore them. Separation, at least, must
have been the ultimate result had not
the jokers finally decided TO show their
hands. One morning as the young hus-
band reached his desk another letter
in certain chirography awaited him.
His heart gave jump. In this he
would be told something specific. He
dreaded to open it, and yet he thirsted
for the solution.
After hesitation lasting five min
hlSo tiS ChfClOpt was lOlu away LIE
next moment bareheaded man, hold
Ing sheet of note paper in his hand,
was running down the street. A block
from home he encountered a woman,
also on the run and also holding an
open letter In her hand.
"Kitty, my darling~
"Oh, my dear Harryp'
II just got this by mail"
"And just got this"
And when they recalled that every
woman In the block was watching
them they compared notes. He read:
that she is using Aliens hair tonic
on her hairr'
And hers
THAT your Harry is getting a bald
spot on top Of his headr'
And then the doves came back and
cooed and never few the coop any
more.
An Expert,