Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1908-05-20

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The ordinary political convention is
q collection of wild animals. whose an
tics are extremely amusing. but abso-
lutely without form and void. Nothing
outside OF cage full of monkeys can
present such an example OF futile &C
uvity- Each delegate is duly ticketed
and loaded with his proper credentials
and fondly imagines that he really is
or some Importance in the gathering:
that is. he does IL he is green
hand. III he is a seasoned campaign.
er, he knows that he merely repre-.
sents the people," and the chairman
and secretary of the convention ''rep.
resent" the delegates. and the boss
es represent" the chairman and sec.
Rotary. By means OF this sliding scale
or actual power IL will be seen that
the bosses" represent the people,
1t was my deep delight to have at
tended number of political conven.
lions. The will of the people" stood
about deuce high" in the political
deck. The will of the bosses was
always the ace" and it could be and
was turned from the bottom or top
Just as the emergencies demanded.
Imagine long. low. rakish hall the
atmosphere wavy blue with tobacco
smoke. Aisles are cut through 10 thu
platform, generally three in number
TO admit of committees on this. that
and the other to go forward to the
| platform and hand I'm their cut-and-
dried Communications. The different
wards and districts are ranged about
the hall, each with its particular spot
TO stay in, like checkers on a board
before the game begins. Many of
these delegates are in their shirt.
sleeves, and many are talking wildly.
gesticulating powerfully and In other
| ways molding the destinies OF their
country. The very few who are not
smoking are choking
On the platform are two tables. at
which the chairman OF the convention
sits, he having been chosen by the
powers that be. He is mere puppct
In their hands, understanding what
they want, and at any and all times
ready to carry out their wishes. The
secretary is mere echo; the assist
ant secretaries mere assistant echoes.
Two or three highly respectable
stoughton-bottles OF various titles sit
on the stage to deceive the unintelIi.
gent observer into the belief that
things are "on the square" A pitcher
OF water is on the chairman's desk.
Tor he Will open the convention with
q speech In that speech he will glori.
ny the proud history of his own party
and skin, salt and nail to the political
smoke-house the hide of the opposite
party. This is species of buncombe
which is always INDUCED in.
Sometimes a convention is opened
with prayer This is something which
cannot be touched on at length for
the devil himself could not conceive a
more S:otesque blasphemy. Most con.
ventions are opened with political
Jimmies,' being burglarious aggrega-
ions, brought together for purposes
or plundering men OF their political
rights. The chairman has his speech
carefully learned by heart, and he is
invariably eloquent, pungent. witty.
scholarly, terse, dense, fowery and
long-winded. But he finally subsidies.
and then, after the committees' re-
| ports and the platform are finished
and some more political red tame ia
! gotten through with, the work of
nominating candidates is begun. But
before the convention has reached the
point OF being ready to vote there
nave been number of battles fought
To finish before the various commit
tees on credentials
In certain wards OF the cities mr.
certain districts in the country, there
may be dispute about some dele.
gates, these claiming the right to rep
resent the people" those putting In
counterclaim for recognition. In
such cases, contests are begun and
the respective claims thrashed out be.
fore the committee on credentials.
which have the power 10 review these
disputes in the various districts or
wards
No one but the contestants and the
committee and the other delegates are
allowed in the committee rooms in
these contests. II being a sort of fam.
lily affair. Usually, the contests are
determined according TO the way the
bosses want them to be decided
but IL It doesn't matter about 4 vote
o. two, the bosses" allow the com.
mittee 70 do as they please. Evidence
Is heard, speeches are made. and the
committee picks the winner
The bosses keep accurate tab"
on the number of votes they need.
but arc ready to achieve results by
any means they consider necessary.
One unseatcd delegate rushed madly
up 20 boss on the floor of the con
vention and screeched out: What