davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30
ALL WRONG
The Mistake Is Made by Many Skew
hogan Citizens.

Don't mistake the cause of back
ache.
TO be cured you must know the
cause.
1t IS wrong to imagine relief $
cure.
Backache is kidney ache
You must cure the kidneys.
Mrs. A. L. Merriam, Of Norridge-
wock, Me, says Il was afflicted
with kidney trouble and rheumatism
for over three years. | had severe
pains in the small of my back. which
were always worse when STOPPING or
lifting. Ny back aehed during the
night and upon rising in the morning
| would be very lame and sore. Ny
kidneys were in a diseased condition
and the secretions caused me con-
siderable annoyance by obliging me
to arise many times during the night
on account of their frequency l
tried many remedies, but was unable
TO find relief. AT last Doan's Kidney
Pills were brought to my attention.
| procured a box and started using
them as directed. They helped me
in a short time, | continued their use
and was cured.'
For Sale by all dealers. Price 50
cents. Foster Milburn c., Buffalo,
\. Y.
Remember the name-Doan's-and
take no other.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

IVT-hDNI 10
Lucas CoUE1Y.
Frank ]. Cheney makes oath that he ia senior part
ner of the firm of =. J. Cheney Co, doing business
in the CITY OF Toledo County and State aforesaid, and
that said firm will pay the SUM Of ONE HUNDRED
DOLLARS for each and every case Of catarrh that
cannot be cured by the use OF Halls Catarrh Cure.
FRANK J CHENEY.
Sworn TO before nae and subscribed in nay presence,
this 9th day OF December, a. d. 1885
{SHAL) A. w. GLEASON,
NoTARY PUBLIC.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally, and
acts directly on the blood and mucous sur
faces of the system. Send for testimonials
free. F. J. CHENEY ~ CO., Toledo, y.
Sold by all Druggists, 75c.
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

1t is to the stoop of the soul that sin
comes. Let it be upright, keep fast
by its integrity, and there is never
danger, never harm.
Itch cured in 20 minutes by Woolford' San
itary Lotion. Never falls. Sold by r W.
Buck nam, Druggist. ~
Resolve to keep happy, and your
Joy and you shall form invincihie host
against difficulties.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30
Church Notes.

Cory for notices under tn. heading
must arrive at our office not later thaA
Tuesday morning
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

Orders for engraved work of any
description, wedding announcements,
calling cards, etc, taken at the RE-
PORTER Office.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

Mind your own business and let
other people mismanage theirs if they
want to.
Itching. torturtng skin eruptions, disn CURE,
annoy drive one Wild. poanS ointm emit
brings quick relief and lasting cures Fisy
cents at any drug store
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

What's the use to receive a post
card, when the illustration it bears is
defaced by the post marking? So
great has been the complaint on this
score, the postmaster general has or
dered discontinuance of the post
marking of cards at the office of ad
dress. The postal card fad has reach
ed enormous proportions and the new
ruling is expected by postal officials
to be received with delight by the
thousands of collectors. An illustrat-
ed history of town or city may be
obtained through these beautiful and
convenient cards.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

Conversing with several Portland
gentlemen the other day, in that
"beautiful city by the sea" we found
nothing but the spirit of hope and
courage for the future. City Hall
will rise again in great beauty and
symmetry on the old familiar lot and
will embrace modern features that
were lacking in the old structure
The frequent disastrous fires didn't
dampen the spirit of the people one
little bit. The hotels are either en-
larging their quarters or bettering
their interior arrangements for ac-
comodating the hosts that will soon
flock to this Heaven blest retreat
and to the adjacent islands that are
brilliant gems in the coronet of old
ocean. There isn't a town in the
State of Maine, inland or sea- washed
that is not proud of fair and prosper
Gus Portland.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30
PLENTY or TROUBLE

is caused by st4gnation Of the liver ano
bowels To get rid Of II and headache ant
bifousness and the poison that brings aun
dice, take Dr. Kings New Life Pills, tht
reliable purifiers thar do the work without
grinding or gripping. 25c al G. x. Fogg
drug store.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

A contented spirit is the sweetness
of existence.
The good man ought to be a thor
oughly bright and happy man.
But of course you never took a
mean advantage OF any one.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

Honor:
Order Gold Medal Flour next time.
FELICITY.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

Meetings every night at 5 o'clock. Sun
day at II a. M Juniors, p. m; Christian
praise, 5 P. m. A Battle for Souls at P. m,
led by Capt and Mrs. Curry.
INTERNATIONAL SUNSHINE SOCIETY.
CRIB 5. 5. will hold the next regular
meeting at the home Of Mrs. Bell L. Gates.
Silver street, Wednesday. May 9th al $50
P. m.
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30

kesIcence - Main ST.
Morning service al Io45; Sunday School
al Il; Christian EndeaYor at &. Evening
Service a, 7 IN the main auditorium. Ms
fhiio Steward, musical director; Miss Anne
Allen. ofganist.
Morning subject, The open Door, even
ing SUBJECT, The Strong Man Who Los, lis
Strength"
The Somerset reporter., 1908-04-30
Solid Indemnity
The Skill of Experience
Fair Treatment for 43 years

the
cuisines EVER FAILED
BROUGHT SUIT FOR LOSS.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
SAVING THE FAIRY TALES

Discussion the Santa Claus myth
Oyeexuberan spirits finding
The school board at Passac n. j., has had
tanning textbooks
Grimm and from the Arabian Nights
But the fight and well de-
lighted child ought to call that school board blessed.
Imagination is better than mathematics
This is hard, materoffact world,
in practical with big p
best prizes in life and the useful living,
strongest and heathiest imagination.
Imagination is the first element of the initiative Without mag
nation, can be only plodding mitator.
How dull dark proftless
its little environment cooped
from the lmtess realms
Childrens minds not be filled full of
sent the principles and emotions that the living
AS for that who these
things Fitting like golden bees honey laden through
Of his
must have neglectfu the earlier
the shadow instead of
pleasure out OF Its life and is blind much opportunity
No creation OF human
through knows how hundreds
unless good For that which
surely that which
through the grinding of the
Let belie underestimate the Imagination.
caiy through the and hear only through the
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
WHY LABOR AT ALL?

story of the first labor day. Moses wrote
book in the Bible
Garden of Eden in which to live.
They they had need of doing anything
the trees plenty and there was no need either
clothes shelter.
simply children without responsibility and without
single need.
But they knew nothing they only children.
knowledge, set apart from the other
animals longer but by his brain He could
had of the
remained in force
lie of thy face shall thou eat bread
also said: Cursed the ground
thistles shall it bring forth to thee
being fed and cared for by the
field and the birds of the air. became higher being and
godke of the mind But lest this faculty
antidoe prescribed
labor.
longer fall the lap of the children of
might he be needless tomorrow True could think
but the keeping placed
hidden of his godike to
the plain problem of daily bread
To make it harder plagued
part knowledge from Man might think but
right live and then only
enjoy of being thinking
of a child of
o a toll and till the soil.
try He sheep who
would themselves tended them he spent the
dness and in thinking thoughts uneavened with the God
prescribed toll
martyr
murderer.
Ever since the decree that must eat his bread in the
sweat of brow mar las trying
Godordained complement and of
ing mind man enjoy the being
be aborer. No shift his
of the worlds work another shoulders and be
reasonable, Godmade Labor is
burden it Gods all intellectual
growth through alone paake of the divine nature
the each
right think and be than the beasts of the field
heritage his twin bless
angs, his title to superiority
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
POE'S REAL MONUMENT

Certain high browed gentlemen who edit literary journals in
their spirits the there
of the birth of Edgar Allen Poe.
settle themselves how best cee
this significant date in American literature Some
Richmond Baltimore still
memorial hall his alma Uni
yersity of Virginia.
ladyike protested
against a memorial .
indeed
Why the creature human being like most of with
il chroniclers o believed.
intention here defend drunkenness. 1t has
other fraiy world
rather late infinitely little visit
sptefu punishment for aty of which the
chief
Think This wrote few which have melodies like
when their highest
happiness He the $50
able
the
ishabe glory literature duced
line that subversive
anmacuh raise their voices superrighous against
celebrating Poes centenary!
Well, let be- The who "Annabel
Helen the who halfdozen
has enduring than pillar
than
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
TME RAAGE OF wwNGlEN

The richest man in Millbury
looked over his well knit, clear
faced son and shook his head as one
who utters incontrovertible wis.
dom.
tom, my boy, the last thing
have to say to you before you go
is: Get down to business. Dis
pense with the fizzy drinks and
the blazing lights, and, above all,
don't even think of woman.
You're 20 now. There will be yet
too much time for these things"
yes, father" assented the
younger Landon. THAT was your
course along the road to success,
presume"
why, yes" said Mr.. Landon,
senior, blinking at a green certifi-
cate of much worth. Il think l
may say, modestly, that my youth
full days were sober and devoid of
this following the light that lies
in the woman's eyes as the days
of any young man we'll could be.
Those lights, my boy, are Turing
beacons, but they can be summed"
Young Mr.. Landon looked upon
his colossal, super rrich father. Il
his colossal, super rich father. Il
will remember, father" he prom
Used. IF l can only follow in your
footsteps am content"
Landon, junior, looked at his
watch and found that an hour must
go by before he should leave for
his train. He had gazed upon his
sire and he had been told the great,
gripping secrets of success and
three was nothing else to do. So
that young Landon glanced idly
about him and picked up that
which first presented.
1t was an old time family album,
with a slasp and an inscription,
From Joseph to Mary" and there
were very many pictures of faded,
ante-bellum danes and their stiff.
solemn SWANS, with here and there
the black, flowered card of men,
DRY. The young man turned idly
through until he fell upon a lus-
trous Spanish lady, whose youthful,
passionate charm the arts of the
old daguerrotyper could not hide.
Father called the boy softly,
"who was the lady, please?'
The older man looked up from
his precious chattels. THAT, my
boy, was little Dolores--a rare bit
of a maid in the old days at Sc
VILE
The great man sighed and re-
turned a bunch of American Alum
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
Makes Cheeks Pink

If for some very particular Occa-
sion you desire pink cheeks, try
this method, which will give the de-
sired result for there or four hours
Rub cold cream into the cheeks
with a rotary movement. Wipe off
the superfluous cream and rub in a
fresh application. Then wash the
face with warm water and rinse it
in cold water, dash.ng it over the
cheeks repeatedly with the hands
Then take piece of ice, wrap it
up in a towel, with but one thick
ness where it is to be applied, and
with this rub Me checks. This will
produce fine pink color, which
will last several hours.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

ute it was necessary to identify
Mile. Cabrera of the Latin Quarter,
and sweet Florabelle Drew of old
Georgia, and finally the De Mile sis
ters, who had done turn at the
Gaiety in the heyday of our fathers.
Concerning these last the elder
Landon recited a tale of high jinks,
where high-priced vintages had
flown and music and mirth held
sway.
"Oh, l was a dog in my day, lad"
the older man observed, between
ringing peals of laughter. ooh,
was dog, | assure you"
The young man looked again at
his watch and the time had come to
depart.
Father" he said, rising and
shaking the elder mans hand. 81
will faithfully observe your admon.
itions. | will drink no costly, heady
wines. l will refrain from the gay,
white places, /"
The door of the room opened and
stately, white haired lady entered
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
MIR. SKYJACK, FROM MARS

HE VISITS THE EARTH AS SPECIAL CORRESPONDENT AND
MAKES WIRELESS OBSERVATIONS IN HIS NOTEBOOK
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

They've pinched me!
Just for wearing the sheath
gown for Bastingthread's
Oh, what shall | do?
| wonder If they are going to
send me up for life.
I've been crying three hours.
The whole town Of Beeleysport
was waiting outside the hotel when
| tripped out with the creation
draping my girlish form. The
crowd, being prepared to do, gasp
ed.
Then an important little hayseed
pushed forward 1t was the village
marshal.
Putting his hand before his face
to conceal his bushes. If any, he
hollers, Female! Ye're under ar
rest in tn name O. tn lawr!"
l nearly tainted.
"Why, for WHAT" | stammers.
Fer disturbin' tn peace an dig
nifty O. tn borough o. Beeleysport, ;"
he replies, throwing horse blan-
ket round my trembling frame,
In the meantime the crowd was
going "Ah-h-h" and "Oh-h-h" and
climbing over each others shout
ders to see. and making flip re-
marks. Oh, II / had only known.
Seeing | was all Ing the country
cop called bus for me, the crowd
running after to see Mile. Iaila-
PIAZZA of Paris" hauled to the town
hall. You'd think | had murdered
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

growls all day and then goes home
and kicks the dog for barking at
night" 81
Short-Yes, I believe some for
tune tellers are on the level. Not
long ago one agreed to tell me
something about my future for a
dollar.
Long-Well?
Short gave her the money and
she told me the time would come
when | would wish | had my dollar
back.
Auntie-What do you think,
Alan? God has sent you a dear
little new sister?
Alan (already fairly well off for
toy)-Oh, l say! Isn't bod spoil
ing me? 4
Phonetic pronunciation of s"the
United States of America" in NAL
ayan is Neg-ree rab-bat A-mer-e-
kan-eese.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

The supreme excellence in all
things is simplicity.-Longfellow.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

mum 6s; and the young man turned
another page-and discovered an.
other lady.
This zone, father-the one with
the haunting eyes,"
Landon, senior, craned his bull
neck. "Ah, Fanny Cadmen-I
priced her greatly, at 20, lad"
The boy nodded in sympathy and
the man went back to his gilt.
sealed papers. But in another min
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

and, coming over to where the two
men stood, she placed a beautiful
white hand on either shoulder.
There was the tear of the grief Of
parting in the lady's eye and her
head was bowed in silence.
And l will have nothing to do
with the fateful, wrecking thing
called woman" finished the lad of
20.
There was a minute of gulping
silence, while the gentle lady wept.
And then: i am an old fool"
said Landon, senior. Go, follow
the promptings of your own dear
heart, lad. Who can take the place
of the woman, anyhow
And Landon, junior, slipped 81
lently out, while Landon, senior.
comforted the lady of the lovely
gray hair.
The supreme excellence in all
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

Grant was a Methodist.
Do more thinking!
Cities have more females than
males.
Our old fried the oyster, has re-
turned from his vacation.
The bones in the body never
touch each other, but are separated
by their membranes. If they did
touch these would be less elasticity
of motion.
six days shalt thou labor, and
do all thy work. Elk. 20:9.
"Do you consider that Louise
falls in love easily?"
well, as a rule, she succumbs
after about a hundred dollars worth
of theater tickets
"Pa, what is the meaning of in
consistency asked Freddy.
Inconsistency, my son." ex.
claimed pa, means a man who
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
AND THE MOST EXCITING TIME OF HER CAREEI
FOLLOWS FAST

somebody in cold blood. These
fools take it seriously Oh, whatll
my folks say! Oh, that I'd never
seen a sheath gown, or was born
with some sense.
They have left me alone while
They have left me alone while
they decide what to do with me.
Helm!
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07

9Th man who
spends his time
wisely saves it,"
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
BABY BORN ON
THE SIDEWALK

CHICAGO, ILL.,, Sept. 6.-While
walking with her husband on Thir-
ty-fifth street, Mrs. VOnties Miller
became the mother of baby girl
Mr.. Miller had gone to nearby
drug store for assistance, but upon
his return in few minutes the
stork had made it's call and de-
parted.
The Spokane press. [volume] (Spokane, Wash.) 1902-1939, 1908-09-07
FOR PLANT VERMIN.

Sometimes washing the infected
leaves in a weak solution Of kero-
sene helps. A teaspoOnful of oil to
a pint of water should be used. APP
ply every other day for a week.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-02-06
THE CUNNING CHINESE.
Scheme to Beat immigration Laws
Discovered In San Francisco.

Scheme to Beat immigration Laws
Discovered In San Francisco.
Despite the rigid examination given
by the immigration inspectors to in
coming Chinese it has been known for
some tine that the inspectors were be-
ing deceived by Asiatics who alleged
they were born in San Francisco, and
the other day one of the schemes used
to delude the inspectors was discov-
cred, says San Francisco correspond
ent Of the Kansas City Star. In order
to prove that the Chinese did live in
San Francisco, as asserted by them,
the inspectors have been in the habit
Of asking the location of well known
buildings, streets and car lines. To
these questions many Of the Chinese
were able to give satisfactory an
swer, and the inspectors had nothing
to do except to admit them.
81. M. North, United States commits
sioner of immigration, discovered a
map in an immigrants possession
showing Chinatown as it was before
the fire, and the fraud was then made
clear. 1t carried instructions how to
answer questions regarding the plan
of the city and of important events Of
the past Commissioner North believes
that copies of these maps have been
sent to China and that after having
studied them the Chinese would come
to the United States, assert that they
were born here and demand the right
to land.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-02-06
GETTING BREAKFAST.
Experience That Taught a Man to Re
spect Woman's Ability.

Experience That Taught Man to Re-
spect Woman's Ability.
d Ever try to get your own break
fasts?" asked the man whose wife is
away. mo? Well, it's most valu-
able education in the art of holding
more than one thing in the mind at q
time. can understand after a week
Of 1t how women get to be expert in
matters Of detail.
1--WE men go through life laundering
along first at one thing and then at an
other, with the idea that what we are
doing at the moment should be finish
ed before anything else is taken up.
You can't get breakfast on that princi-
pie. Women instinctively know how
to run half dozen things at once.
When they have the coffee on the
stove and the toast is browning and
the eggs cooking they can put the fin
ishing touches on the setting Of the
table with light and cheerful heart.
At the psychological moment the cof-
fee will be whisked off, the toast ex-
tracted and the eggs removed to a
place where further application of
heat is impossible. It's wonder to
me how they do it.
"a man if he essays to make coffee
must devote his whole attention to the
operation; likewise with everything
else. If he doesn't there'll be trouble.
He isn't success In a double act,
and when the question is one Of a
triple or quadruple act he might as
well throw up his hands. At least,'
he concluded, with shade of pride in
his tone, "till he's got the hang of it,"
$50 you consider yourself qualified
now, do your" his friend inquired,
with mock seriousness.
IF a succession of spoiled meals
qualities me-" the first speaker rejoin-
ed. I'm it."-New York Press.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-02-06
Improving the Breed.

Shortly after a new administration
took hold of well known southern
railroad a great number of claims
were preferred against the company
on account Of horses and cattle being
killed along the line in Kentucky. To
make matters worse, 1t appeared that
every animal killed, however worth
less 1t may have been before the acct
dent, Invariably figured in the claims
subsequently presented as being Of the
best blood in Kentucky. One day in
conversation with one Of the roads at
torneys the president became very
much excited in referring to the situa-
lion. do you know" he exclaimed,
bringing down his fist on the desk by
way Of emphasis, 81 have reached the
conclusion that nothing in Kentucky
30 improves live stock as crossing it
with locomotive" Montreal Star.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-02-06
FOREST FIRES.
The WatehfuI Rangers and the Way
They Fight the Flames.

The Watehfui Rangers and the Way
They Fight the Flames.
In almost any of the western noun
tafns the traveller sees the fire warm
ings of the forest service, and he is
likely to meet some of the rangers.
You will find them crossing the high
Sierras in California, in the Crazy
mountains Of Montana, among the
Olympics in Washington or following
the old Apache trails along the mesas
In Arizona Wherever he is, the ranger
keeps keen lookout for the smoke of
forest fires, and In the clear western
atmosphere even little smoke column
can be detected from afar. AS soon as
he discovers it the ranger takes his az
and shovel and goes as only western
horse and rider can. Many small fires
are stopped by this watchfulness, but
there are others which take many men
many hours to subdue A fire in
chaparral SO thick that a man can
hardly force his way through it and
parched by six months of drought
makes hard and trying fighting. Then
sASAS a. z hASS Ii lie dIuUnS
the dead trees of old windfalls and
overhead fires that spread faster than
a man can run. If unchecked, they
will burn for weeks over thousands OF
acres of timber.
And all this destruction may be caus-
ed by carelessly left campfire or a
match dropped from horseback. The
sheep men used to set the forest on
fire purposely, for the year after fire
the burned acres yield fine forage.
Happily this practice is discontinued.
Sparks from locomotives now set more
fires within the national forests than
any other cause. Camping parties are
the next worst offenders. Indians,
stockmen, miners and lumbermen who
travel continually in the forests very
seldom leave campfres to spread and
do damage. They know too wen the
results. For time almost every year
the citizens of Portland, Ore, lose sight
of some of the great mountains around
the city on account Of the smoke from
the burning forests. There is little
doubt thar since the white man settled
In the west more timber has been use
lessly burned than has been cut and
used.-Arthur W. Page in Worlds
Work.