The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1908-01-09
THE NATIONAL CAPITOL.
Especial Correspondence,)

bSHlllSlOll, ~ ~, JAM I, lSOo
The results of the so-called riding
tests of mounted officers of the ar
my have been made public and the
report is not only interesting, but
like the late Artemus Wards Kan
garoo, is "amoosin' J." 1t shows
that large proportion of the "Coi-
nels" have failed to measure up to
the requirements, and, unless the
President changes his mind on the
subject, will be marked for retire
ment. This, of course, will make
opportunity for lot of promotions,
and may have a wholesome effect
upon the personnel of the force. A
good many of the Generals and
Colonels of the army have been liv-
ing luxurious lives in Washington
and elsewhere and would probably
have tough time of it if suddenly
called into active field service.
There is another side to the ques
ton, however. Quite number of
the Generals and Colorels of the
army have been and are still serv-
ing OH details in the various bu
reaus of the War Department and
are required to mount nothing more
fractious than a high stool and
"sit' nothing more difficult to
manage than an Office chair. Of
ficers who have grown corpulent as
well as gray i'll the service could
perform such service just as we'll as
the 1.-THE and willowy" young
sters who wear corsets and lead the
German in the post ball rooms or
at society functions at the capital.
The retirement of the seniors and
promotion OF the juniors, in obedi
ence to the Presidents whim prom
ises, therefore, to be an unnecessa-
ry and expensive luxury.
The humorous aspect of the af-
fair, moreover, is revealed when
considered from another viewpoint.
A Colonel on the retired list gets a
salary of about 81, 500 year with
absolutely nothing to do. Most of
them are fairly we'll off and such
an annuity, supplemented with
their other sources of revenue will
enable them to live the aristocratic
life of retired gentlemen" as
completely as if they had been
''born in the purple" and inherited
dukedoms and baronies. Ii is not
altogether surprising, therefore,
that some Colonels who can sit
horse like Centaur, should have
failed in the horseback test or de-
clined to enter the competition.
They have no chance of reaching
much higher rank and have sons in
the service who may be advanced
by their retirement.
In other words it is broadly sus-
pected that good many of the
failures to meet the horseback test
were by design. A colonel in the
army at the age of ffty-fve, for
example, has little chance of pro-
motion unless he happens to be a
Presidential favoritc, under the
regulations which retire him at the
lge of siXty-three. But lots of
them at that age have plenty Of
ability and ginger to acquire Sue
cess in business or professional life.
IF they resign from the army to
take advantage of other opportuni-
lies, they forfeit the chance OF a re-
tired officers pay in their old age.
out the crazy notion of President
Roosevelt, of retiring them at any
age in the event of failure to meet
his ideas in equestrianism, gave
chance to kill two birds with one
,tone.
Roosevelt is really wonder.
Everybody laughs at him and yet
no man in or out of Congress has
the temerity to antagonize him. In
ais recent faux paux III the naval
affair there was ample opportunity
% make him beg for mercy. l
have authentic information that he
has since admitted that Surgeon
General Rixey deceived him with
respect to the deliverance of The
Hague tribunal on the equipment