davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Humiliatina.

Champ Clark frequently visited
Washington before his election to the
house and thought he was pretty well
known there. On one occasion. says
the Washington Star, he came TO the
capital on business for a client He
was surprised and pleased to meet an
old friend and townsman at the hotel
Mr.. Clark had selected for his stay.
well, well, II it isn't Brown ex-
claimed Mr.. Clark. I'm glad to see
you. Is there anything can do for
your"
Then Mr.. Clark took his friend by
the arm and marched him to the hotel
desk, saying. 81 can DO you good
turn, anyhow"
Clerk" added Mr.. Clark when they
had reached that functionary. this is
my friend Mr. Brown. ! want you to
treat him right. Let him have what
ever he wants, and IL he gets too ex-
trayagant and runs out of cash just
charge 1t to me-"
why, yes" said the clerk, II know
Mr.. Brown very well, sir. but who are
you?"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Insects guide them selves In flight al
most entirely and Oh the ground partly
by means of their faceted eyes. The
antennae and the buecal sensory Or
gans cannot help In aerial steering.
Insects perceive the motion of OBJ
jects particularly WE'LL. e.. the dis
placements of visual images relatively
to the compound eye. They therefore
see better when on the wing than at
rest for during flight the image of Inn
mobile objects is displaced relatively
to the eye.
Insects distinguish the contours and
forms of objects only more or less In
distinctly.
Insects appreciate the direction and
distance of objects very clearly during
flight by the aid of their compound
eyes. They can also appreciate, even
when at rest, the distance Of immobile
objects.
Certain insects Cbees, bumblebees)
distinguish color clearly and recognize
colors better than forms. Among
others (wasps) the perception Of color
appears, on the contrary, to be very
neutrality-suspicious. of Insects"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
A Race With the Sun.

An English magazine says that IL an
aerial machine were capable of travel
ing at any rate up to 1000 miles an
hour traveller In 1t, starting wesi-
ward from London at a speed OF tOO
miles an hour. would arrest the prog
ress of time. II he started at 10 a M.
1t would always be to him 10 a. IN.
Should be find his unending day mo
notonous be could reverse his direc-
ton and get quick succession Of short
days and nights of some six hours
duration, but he could regulate the
length by the speed Of his machine.
Suppose he trave'ed from London one
night at 10 o'clock westward at a
speed of 1000 miles per hour. He
would soon experience the sensation
of seeing the sun rising in the west
where 1t had set short time before.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
REvERE-CORNvILLE-

Farmers are wearing more pleasant
faces since the rain.
The Misses Mary and Edith Wilson
of Scion visited at Baker and Priests
the first of the week.
Mrs. Eugene Parkman and little
daughter Gladys, visited Mrs. Park
mans mother, Mrs. Goodwin, on The
Notch road last Sunday. Mrs. Good
win is in very poor health this
summer.
Among the out of town callers
Sunday were Mr.. and Mrs. Martin
Harville OF East Madison, Mrs. G. j.
Abbey, Mrs. Loantha Wentworth,
G. E. Morrill,, Mr.. and Mrs. ]. E.
Buker of Skowhegan. Mrs. Alonzo
Smith and daughter, Miss Alice, also
called on friends here Sunday. Miss
Alice will go the last of this month
to Bingham where she Is to teach for
the next year In the Mahony district.
Mrs. Melvina Wills Of Lowell, Mass.
who has been visiting friends here,
at Scion, Skowhegan and Cumberland
Mills, has now gone to Ocean Point
to spend the remainder of the sum-
mer with her daughter.
Mrs. Sumner Rowell of Dover, was
visiting friends in this vicinity
recently.
Mrs. Alice Carpenter was called to
her SISTERS, Mrs. John Redmond,
Monday night, to behold their guest
which proved to be darling baby
girl.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
The Submarine Crew.

Not until you have gone down in
submarine and seen the crew at work
can you say you have seen the limit to
which 1t is possible to drill human
creatures. No crack company of regi-
ment, no fire company In any Of our
big cities, not even the engine force on
a man of-war, Is under such discipline
as the crew of a submarine. The navy
department and the men themselves
realize that months are required before
even the most capable group OF ten
can be made to work as unit, perfect
as clockwork. There Is no time to
break In" crews when once war Is de-
clared, and for this reason the subma-
rine service Is continually and inces-
sanity In war practice. Practice runs
In the ordinary sense do not exist.
Each time the boat stands out to sea
she goes as II for business. the scenes
you see being exactly like those that
would be enacted we're the vessel bent
upon actually shaking an enemy.-St-
Nicholas.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
No Halo Wanted.

Scene, a courtroom. A big. burly
artisan is brought in by the bailin
and placed In the dock. He is a reg
ular Hercules In point of stature and
Is brought up on charge of assault
1t Is evidently his first appearance in
court.
When be enters the magistrate Is
busy with his papers, but presently
looks up hurriedly and, turning to the
prisoner, exclaims:
Have you engaged any one to de-
fend your"
whats thatw asks the prisoner;
then, collecting himself, he adds: 81
don't want anybody Come on. any
half dozen of your'-London Answers.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

In the days of the second empire
Baron eros was sent TO Japan to de-
mand the opening OF certain ports to
French commerce Among the rest he
named to the japanese ministers a GER
tain city. The japanese functionaries
smiled so broadly when he preferred
the request that the French ambassa-
dor asked them to tell him what gave
them 80 much amusement, but Instead
of answering the Japanese ministers
said:
I'VE will open the port In question,
my lord, II France In her turn will
open a certain port to US"
what port Is that?" asked the
Frenchman.
'The port of Liverpool"
"But, your excellencles." laughing,
Liverpool Is not a French port, but
an English one"
YES" answered the japanese, land
the port you named is not in Japan,
but in Korea"
The French ambassador was com
PEELED to admit that the Joke was
against him.-London Answers.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Little boy" asked the new teacher.
what is your nameY'
I'll have to write 1t for you, miss. "
he said hesitatingly.
Why? My hearing Is quite good!
Your name, boy!"
I'D rather not tell yeu.'
Surely you can't be ashamed of 1t p
mo, miss, but
Then we will not waste any more
time. IL you please! am waiting!'
The small boys eyes rolled wildly In
their sockets, and his face became con
torted with pain as he began:
"Ku-kuk-kuk-kuk-ku kuk Clarence!
That's my FIRST name, miss. But my
other name Is Pup-pup-pup-pup-P Per
kins! l never stutter 'cept when I'm
speaking my name, and when I'm
nagged like this | get a whole lot
worse, miss"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
PisHON'S FERRY.

Tristram A. Kicker, an aged and
respected citizen of Clinton, died at
his home Sunday. He had been in
failing health for several months but
was confined to his bed but few
weeks. A widow, who was formerly
Mrs. Mary Goodrich of E. Skowhe-
gan, one son, George 8. Kicker of
Canaan, and three grandchildren with
other relatives survive. Funeral SER
vices took place at his late home
Tuesday morning.
Emerson Hall, who recently sold
his farm at North Fairfield has pur-
chased the farm known as the Hodges
place of Henry Manson, and moved
his family last week.
Mrs. M. E. Booker has been enter
tanning relatives from Oakland the
past week.
E. F. Parker and family entert aimed
relatives from Lexington recently.
Mrs. Alfred Hilton and little daugh-
ter, left home Monday for a visit of
several weeks with relatives in Jack
man, and NARROW, Canada.
Work on the boom finished Satur-
day.
We are sorry to note that the Sun
day afternoon services at the Good
Will Pines, are to be discontinued.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
CHAM.

Mrs. Mary Colby and Mrs. F. H.
Preble are at Fosest Colby 5 cottage
this week.
Alvah Witham's new house is pro-
crossing well, main house and ell are
up and boarded.
Mrs. Louis Hopkins of Southbridge,
Mass. arrived in town Saturday, the
guest of her parents, Mr.. and Mrs. D.
j. Lander.
Mrs. Mary Colby has been quite Ill
the past day or two.
Mrs. Sarah Moore is now stopping
with Mrs. Rose Adams.
Oscar Owens and wife are making
their home with Charles GiVens foI
the present and intend to remain TILL
fall and perhaps longer.
Mrs. Mark Dinsmore has a number
of roomers who are taking their meals
at Sands restaurant.
Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Colby have
been spending several days at Pleas
ant pond returning on Monday
At hearing held recently permis-
sion was granted the Maine Tele-
graph and Telephone Co. to erect
poles and string wires on the different
roads in Bingham and Moscow.
Mildred Miller has been sick in bed
for several days.
W. B. Goodrich and family are
spending the present week at their
Pleasant Cove farm at Pleasant pond.
Jamie Rogers and Belle Colby are at
tending store and telephone during
their absence.
L Athena
Saturday, but Mrs. Ball will remain
till Oct. LIST.
Funeral services of Mr. Alfred
Chase were held in the Congrega-
tional church on Tuesday afternoon.
Rev. W. A. Richmond spoke words of
comfort and Mount Moxie Lodge OF
which he was an honored member
held their exercises at the church and
at the grave. Mr.. Chase had long
been a highly respected citizen OF
Bingham until few years ago, after
the death of his wife he made his
home with his daughter, Mrs. Milton
Plummer, Roch ester, n. H., where he
died His son, Edible Chase OF
Skowhegan assisted in the care OF his
father during his last illness, and &C
companied the remains to Bingham
on Monday.
The annual meeting and picnic of
the Sugartown school association will
occur Thursday, Aug. Goth. 1t will
include teachers and pupils OF both
the old and new schools. Several
from abroad are expected.
An exhibition test of the efficacy OF
q fire extinguisher was made on Bling
hams main street Monday night. A
large dry goods box soaked in kero-
sene was blazing furiously and 1t was
Immediately extinguished by one APP
plication.
Will Hamilton, Jessie Washburn,
Bessie Carney and Marion Stoddard
were at Lakewood on last Saturday.
Mrs. Robert Woods has company
this week.
Mr.. Elijah Hall was in starks last
Monday.
Among those attending Supt. Ball's
school OF instruction are Miss Olive
G. Hartwell, Boston, Mass; Mrs.
Maytie Livingstone, Eda Danforth
and Grace Hutchinson, Madison;
Gladys Starbird and Edith Pierce,
Scion; Flora Berry, Embden; Horace
b. Dodson, Hermon; Gertrude Van
derpool and Annie Morris, Concord |;
Belle Spaulding and Artie Young,
Moscow; Alice Cahill, May Baker and
Valetta Beedy, Bingham; Claude s.
Sidelinger, Washington; John w. II.
8. Hodgdon, Lewiston.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Noise.

Noise, at first cultivated In this land
by the Indians. has reached Its china X
In the college yell. 1t Is used at pc
litical conventions, at christenings and
at women's clubs. No monument was
necessary for the man who first in
vented noise. His work lives after
him.
Noise is used by cities. which have
the first call for It. They split 1t up
into as many sounds as possible and
divide 1t among all.
Noise varies In It's volume and in
tensity, from embryonic and immature
sawmill to a baby crying 10 the night.
Life.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

$50 you don't believe in the story OF
Jonah and the whale?"
No" answered Mr.. Meekton thought
fully.
How do you suppose 1t originated? ?"
"Well, l suppose Jonah had been
away from home for some time and
had to tell his wife something"-Kan
sas City Newsbook
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Orinin Of nPalI MALI

"Pall Mall pronounced pell NELL
comes from pale MALE. an ancient
game supposed to have been played on
the present site of Pail Mall by Nor
man monks. by whom 1t was intro
duced into England.
The observant Pepys in his famous
diary makes mention of 1t thus:
april 2. 1861. Into st. James park,
where saw the Duke Of York playing
at Pelemele, the first time that ever !
saw the sport"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Call upon yourself first when you
need help, for no one else is so anxious
to aid you.
Fine character, in ourselves or In
our friends, is like polished silver
the least mar stands out so distinctly
On the upturned page: "The mis-
sion of women is to make unhappy
and be unhappy"-yerily it would
seem vice. man; but is such writer
truthful? IT'S for each to answer.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Shelf a man loves his wife as
much as she loves him he will stop
wasting his money on cigars II she
asks him. He-Yes, but If his wife
loves him as much as she ought to love
a man who loves her enough to stop If
she asks him she won't ask him.-Puck.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Thoughts of a Philosopher.

If you have no keen miseries, by
what comparison will you feel keen
Joys?
Contentedness with ones life pro-
duces better health than the best of
food, exercise, or right living.
Find fault with books because they
are not like life; be not dissatisfied
with life because it is not like books.
Many true word is spoken by &C
cident.
Hope is good breakfast, but bad
supper.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Hia Only Mant.

Billionalre's Daughter-You wrong
him, papa. He does not love me for
my money. He SCOTS at the world
sordid eagerness for wealth. Papa
What proof have you, child2 Billion
aires Daughter-Why. only last night
he told me he didn't care If he was
never able to make penny In bis life
IL he only had me-
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Home life in England lacks the init
macy and the charming sentimentality
Of German family life. The sons Of
England have to leave home early In
life to go out into the wide world and
fight for themselves. They become in
dependent, responsible men much ear
lier than our sons do.-Berliner Tage-
blatt
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Monarch House Paint

Is made from Pure White Lead, Pure
Zinc White, Pure Coloring Matter
with Linseed Oil and Turpentine Dry
er for thinning. We do not know
how to make a better paint than Mon
arch.
The Blunt Hardware Co.,
Skowhegan, Me.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

"Do you consider your nerve Is SUN
eie1tly steady to fit you for an airship
navigator
well. I've been out In canoe with
nervous fat girl. Cleveland Plain
Dealer
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

Mrs. Caller-Ars your new neighbors
rehned7 Mrs. Nextdoor-I should say
SO! They never borrow anything but
our silver and cut glass.-Chicago
News.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
GaNa Him Up.

THE doctors have given Johnson
up"
Dear me, is he as Ill as that?'
mo; he's quite well. That's why
they've given him up"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Married Mans PROGRESS.

The hrst year after marriage man
holds his wife fondly the second year
he holds the baby awkwardly. and ev-
cry year after that be holds his tongue
Seusibly. Dallas News.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
BIRTHS.

Caratunk-Aug. 6, to the wife OF Glib Arn-
strong son.
Cornville-Aug. 10, to the wife OF ohm Red
mond daughter.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

When one is able to smile courage
ously through misery, one has con-
quered Fate, and there is no reason
why happiness is not ever his.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
DEATHS.

North New Portland-Aug. 8, Ada NJ, wife
OF Charles Webb, aged 30 years.
skowhegan-Aug. 3, Mrs Mary A., wido W
of the late N P. Wood, aged ~ years
Norridgswock-Aug. g. Mrs. Jshn Otis,
aged n years
Austr alia-May 10, Leonard Richardson,
aged II years.
Bingham-Alfredc Chase.
Skowhegan--Aug.b 8, Berle Beatrice daugh-
ter of Mr.. and Mrs G. Frank Brown, aged
Syears. 2 months and 20 days
Cimton-Aug. 9, Tristan A. Kicker.
solon-July 81, Mrs. VIVA. stuart.
Skewhegan-Aug 7, John Ware, aged
about SO years
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

"Flattery is like a fairy tale. EvsA
though one does not believe 1t. one lis
tens willingly to It,"
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Lots of People
Can't And rent,
Cams secure a good house girl,
Can't sell their farms,
Can't find employment,
Can't ind lost articles

Can't do hundred things because
they don't advertise in the REPORT
Err. 1t is really wonderful how much
can be accomplished by the use of
these little, low priced advertise
ments.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Small Rent Wanted.

For lady and her daughter. Should
be three or four rooms, centrally To-
Gated. Address, tf31
F. R. N, care Somerset Reporter.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
MARRIAGES.

Rockland-Aagast ., q. Harold Randlett
OF Skowhegan and Miss Edith Whltehouse
OF Roc kiand.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

The best of music will b. furnished all day
by the Lakewood Band, MI. H. +. Towne,
leader.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13
Addresses by the following
well known speakers

Following the speakers in the afternoon there
Will be an exc heat Vaudeville Entertainment from
the agency Of Jos. J. Flynn, and also perform
anee at 8. 10 p. m.
The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1908-08-13

The famous Strobel Air Ship will be on exAi-
bition and make two flights each day, weather
permitting. This is the best attraction of this
kind obtainable aud far ahead of anything ever
in shis State. They have made great success
wherever they have been.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1908-06-07

nv ROYALTY would not pay me enough to board me
three months; whereas my eastern contract
carried out could be profitable to me, tor had a
sort of reputation on the Atlantic seaboard acquired
through the publication of six excursion letters IN
The New York Tribune" and one or two IN " The
Herald" o1
on certain conditions: in my preface | must thank
The Alta for waving its rights and granting
me permission. objected to the thanks | co TIId
not with any large degree OF sincerity thank ne
Alta for handwriting my lecture raid After con-
siderable debate my point was conceded, and the
thanks left out. .
Noah Brooks the editor of " The Alta at me
"a man of sterling character and equipped with
a right heart also good historian where facts were
not essential In biographical sketches OF me written
many years afterward Coo2) he was quite eloquenC
in praises of the generosity of The Alta people IN
giving to me without compensation book which, as
history had afterward shown, was worth fortune
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1908-06-07

Stevenson, nothing for plenty Of other people -.
quite handsome for me In 1907. when we vs-s
living in Tedworth Square. London and was W.T.
ing the book called Following the EQUATOR NJ
average was eighteen hundred To-l "a dav: here
Florence (I9o4), my average seems -J be four+eeT
hundred words per sitting Of four o- five borr
with the pen, l mean This autobiography IS dc
tated, not wrIttenJ
| was deducing from the above thar have been
slowing down steadily IN these th-t IL wears t-4
1 perceive that my statistic have defect. tb-ss
thousand words IN the spring IL 1908 when Wa
working seven or eight or nine --.-s at sjttrg
has little or no advantage over the -1g of to-daT
covering half the time and producing half the orr
put Figures often beguile me. rt~-i-u-arlv wba-
have the arranging Of them rnrs... m uhIcb e.
the remark attributed To- DizracI --1 often ami
with Justice and force.
There are three kinds Of ll-- lis damned lies
and statistics
To b. continued 5sr915 --.--.-
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1908-06-07
SUNDAY MAGAZINE FOX JUNE a. i0oo

After all the fuss did not levy heavily upon me
Alta letters. | found that they were newspaper
matter, not book matter They had been wr'1 bed
-, me- = chance working moment or two during
our feverish flight around about Europe OF m the
furnace heat of my state room on board the oE1 d
y4ed TO have some of the wind and water squeezed
ont Of them used several of them,-ten or twelve
perhaps wrote the rest OF The lnnoc fert9
1ott's labor with the pen and gotten along without
the letters altogether.
WAS very Young in those days,-exceedIngly
L ,,o,rno marveIO1IS1v Young, Younger than | am
now younger than shall ever be again, by hundreds
Of wears worked every night from leven or tTelVe
mil broad dav in the morning, and as L did two
hundred thousand words in the sixty days the
average was more than three thousand words day
nothing for Sir Walter Scott, nothing 1or LOUIS
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1908-06-07
Bv ROBERT H. ROC E r S

HON'T laugh at the battered appearance r
- of the crazy looking old tramp steamer
which wallows clumsily in the wake OF the
speeding ocean liner. To do would be to
confess ignorance of a stirring business of the
sea-that of freighting by steam. The d1lapl-
dated hulk which always looks with curious
interest may have made twenty thousand miles since
she weighed anchor from her home port. a closer
inspection might reveal a battered funnel, STAYED
bulwarks. and a smashed bridge mute witnesses to
a more or less unequal struggle with furious gales.
If the Captain of the vessel is communicative,
he may decipher the long string of code flags tutter
ing from the freghter-the only bright spots, by
the wav in the picture: Condenser out OF order.
Report me disabled but making repairs. VIII not
require assistance" And he will add that tramp
will never take tow line so long plank remains
atloat
Passenger steamships will come and 60, sensa-
tiOnallv heralded occasionally the daily papers,
telling graphically of a broken shaft mended in
heavy seas or of a fire in the hold of which the
dlled; but it remains for the old tramp stand
The exponent of all that is daring, combative, and
energetic the entire category of human resource
funeSS
All wondered when years ago the Umbria's
engines broke down, and it was learned that though
nine DAYS overdue she still lmped safely into port;
but apart from the owners, Consignees, and crew,
who remembers that the Spanish tramp EOlO
out of coal when nearing the Delaware breakWater
IN December, 1900, on a voyage from hamburg tor
Philadelphia. and how Captain Egorodo burned the
very woodwork of the ship before he would consume
as fuel under his boilers the cargo of Christmas toys
which meant much the little children of the
Quaker City?