The Washington times., 1908-12-13
DARKEST AFRICA"
AMUSES GRIDIRON
Tagged Auditor" the big
Noise" of Presidential
Take-Off.
DICTATES STORY
FROM THE WILDS
Meanwhile Cashier Keeps Tab on
Editor Roosevelt's Space Ac-
count at Dollar Per.

Darkest Africa, its joys and tribula-
tions, and the fame which is coming to
it shortly after Judge Taft becomes
President Of the United States, was de-
picted at the fall dinner OF the Grid
iron Club at the New Willard Hotel.
The skit was heralded by the rOars of
every known and unknown beast in the
animal kingdom. In the foreground was
a tent labeled THE Lookout" in front
Of which stood an orderly in khaki and
guard with a spear, and an individual
pith helmet, a Zulu chief, who stood
tagged auditor"
The auditor was the big noise of the
Presidential take-of. He was equipped
with a bell punch. Within the tent the
rattle Of a typewriter was heard
''Scribbler's Magazine. New York" was
dictated Victoria Nyanza. April 1.
The lion is a Wild and ferocious ami
NAL
Every word OF the dlctatio1o meant
that the DELL punch went to work, and
al the end of each sentence the total
amount OF words transferred into dol
lars was announced. thus: The lion
is a wild and ferocious animal" went
the dictation. Eight dollars" shouted
the auditor 1T has a soft body and
hard face" continued the author. ''Sev-
enteen dollars" chanted the man OF fig
ures. ''It is the king of beasts and its
daughter is a princess the huntsman
Inurmured audibly. ''Twenty-nine dol
lars" shouted the auditor, with increas-
ing satisfaction. The lion rOars like
distant thunder" ''Thirty-fve dollars"
But it's nObOdy's business what It's re
legion is" 'Forty-four dollars"
Makes Big killing"
When the instalment Of the magazine
story had been finished. the eX-President
that he would kill something. There
was a shot, and Zulu dashed away
into the jungle. He returned trium-
phantIy with a small skin which was
said TO have been taken from the body
OF a ''bOngO'' Instantly the private
secretary was summoned, a story was
dictated about the habits and stamping
grounds of the "bOngO," and was only
brought to a close by the appearance
near the Lookout tent of a whiffle-
ruff, which was brought down b. a
shot from the authors rifle. As the
animals were killed they were photo
graphed with elaborate ceremony, and
then stuffed and mounted.
President Roosevelt and Judge TAFT
sat side by side at the banquet table,
and they enjoyed the skit more than
any other guests.
Frank II. Hitchcock, the next Post
master General. was also the subject
or hazinE. particular attention being
paid 10 fOndness for travelling on the
twentieth century limited between Chi
caEo ad New York.
Distinguished Guests.
Among the guests were the President
and Vice President, PresIdent-elect Taft
and Vice President-elect sherman,
Speaker Cannon, OF the House Of Rep
resentatives; Secretary of the Navy
Newberry; Secretary Garfield, of the In
terror; Postmaster General Meyer; Gov
ernor Magoon, Of Cuba; +. II. Harri-
man. of New York; William ". Collier,
United States minister to Spain; Chair
man Hitchcock. OF the Republican Ma
tiOnal Committee; Norman +. Mack. a
number Of Senator's and Representa-
tives, visiting newspaper men. and sew
eral prominent residents of Washington.