davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

ttY1NCLE IKE" Stephenson, the new
~ 71-year-old millionaire United
States senator from Wisconsin, is hav-
ing an awful hard time trying to have
money and be a senator at the rate OF
$500 per annum.
Uncle Ike is a brother of Samuel
NJ. Stephenson, former representative
from Michigan, who entered congress
during the Fifty-drst session just after
Isaac had retired. When the new
senator came to town in December he
brought with him his whole family,
even to the third generation, and the
daushters-in-law and the sons-in-
law
Scnatorships don't happen every
day, quoth Uncle Ike and what's
the use of being stingy about spend
ing few extra simoleons while one
is getting $500 year for running
department errands and sitting in the
senate and looking wise. So he took
fine suite of rooms at the New Will
lard and prepared to wear button
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

r HE Club cars" which are used to
i carry fashionable commuters be.
tween their suburban homes and the
city, bid fair to 60 out of business
Cause, financial ,stringency. There are
several of the cars in service particu.
larly on the Jersey roads, Morristown
sends in two in the morning that re-
turn in the late afternoon Bernards-
vile sends one-Plainf1eld and Lake.
wood contribute one each over the
Jersey Central, Tuxedo one, Nyack one
over the Erie and Newburg one over
the West Shore. Brewster sends one
down over the Northern; while four
start from stations on the Long Island
railroad
The price for reserved seat in one
of the cars is approximately $125 a
year for every rs miles, in addition to
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Passing of Club Cars of Commuters

commuted fare. The club car may
run empty. but its luxury is not for
the average commuter under any con-
ditlons. Nor will Morristown share
its club car privilege with Summit or
Short Hills. Nor Plainf1eld with West
field or Crawford. Nor Lakewood with
anybody, nor Tuxedo with Paterson.
They are singular and expressive evi-
dences of exclusiveness.
One of the roads has notified its
patrons that club car will be put on
for 20 subscribers this year from any
station. Hitherto it demanded 30
patrons. 1t has also reduced it's price
by five dollars. But, notwithstanding
these tempting offers, some of them
have been taken off simply because
the people have not the money to
spend for that purpose In one case a.
darker cause was discovered. They
play cards on the trips and a profes.
slonal gambler secured membership
and piled his vocation so successfully
as to disrupt the community as we'll
as to nearly bankrupt it. For that
reason one Of the Morristown cars
goes back to the common status of
parlor car on the day express.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Manhattan Anchored by Costly Bands

and costing $12,000,000, comes next
for a place in the public mind
After these come two other East
river bridges, the Manhattan bridge
and the Blackwell's Island bridge,
which are now we'll under way. Then
come IA structures. almost as impor-
tant but less pretentious, over the Har-
lem river, Spuyten Duyvil creek and
the Ship Canal
These are to be followed by the
great New York and New Jersey
bridge, over the Hudson river, which
has been situated between West Forty
ninth and Fiftieth streets, and which
will cost $20,000.000.
The underground tunnel connections
now number seven, six being under
the East and North rivers, equally di-
vided, and one under the Harlem.
These will probably be doubled in
number before many more years.
Besides the subway that connects
the island with the Borough of the
Bronx, the rails have just been put in
use under the East river from the
Battery to Brooklyn Borough. Two
more under water connections are
nearing completion-the Pennsylvania
tunnel at Thirty-frst street and an
other at Forty-second stree:. Then
the Pennsylvania tunnel is being com
pleted westward through Thirty-first
street under the North river into New
Jersey. Two other North river sys-
TENS from Jersey City terminate at
Cortlandt and at Morton streets re-
spectively.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

IITHERE." sighed the professor, as
he placed drop Of what looked
like SOUP but was really dis
solved paper, on glass slide, three
waves of my wand and We will see
what this rascally jobber has been
selling to the government"
1t was in the paper-testing division
of the United States bureau Of stand
ards that this monologue took place.
The government printing office had
sent some samples of paper to be
tested. The samples were warranted
to be pure poplar pulp paper"
That's the poplar murmured the
professor. as he dropped some liquid
from a glass tube upon the small glo-
bule of soup. and watched it turn
purple. Now for the spruce"
it required but moment to pick
up another glass tube and apply anoth-
er drop of colorless liquid. Under its
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
She Had ~ Husbands.

sort OF men some of them were men.
tally. morally and spiritually.
"Of course l know the names of al!
my husbands when l stop to think"
said Mrs. Townsend. 1T is true, how.
ever, that l do get them confused in
my mind occasionally. Within short
time I was married to and separated
from good many men. With some of
them l lived but few months. It is
those with whomm lived so short a
time that sometimes cannot recall
readily. Some Of my husbands l re-
member very, very distinctly. and can
tell you all about them"
For more than 40 years this remark
able woman made her home in Council
Bluffs, where she is we'll known. Most
OF her numerous marriages were cele-
brated there. Her old neighbors in
Council Bluffs have good word to
say for her in despite of her peculiar
views on marriage and the extraor-
binary matrimonial record she has
established.
AAC ACA IlVIAS III OOuuClI
who were formerly her husbands
speak not unkindly of her, either.
Her children have opposed her mar
rying so frequently, but they say she
is woman of good heart and she has
always been good to them.
AS for Mrs Townsend herself. she
says the explanation of her IA mar
riages lies in the fact that she has a
very affectionate nature and cannot
live happily alone, and to the further
fact that every woman needs a hus-
band to support her.
She advertised for a husband after
her separation from her thirteenth
husband, and in this way became ac-
quainted with and finally the wife of
Townsend.
Townsend is IS years old, hale and
hearty, prepossessing in appearance
and address, and is held in the warm
est regard by all who know him. He
has lived in and near Dodge for many
years, and no man in the community
is more respected and honored than he.
Mrs. Townsend says it is easy
enough for any woman to capture the
husband she sets her heart upon If she
but manage right.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

IF THE public service commissioners
l could enforce the employment Of en-
tertaining guards and conductors f2r
the cars there would be fewer COM
plants from straphangers. People
want to be amused, and really some.
thing ought to be done to make the
noisy, jolting trip between stations
pass pleasantly. The advertisements
are not changed often enough to be
of any use as diversion and an anus
ing trainman would surely make his
mark.
It is interesting to know that at
least one guard has found this out
and that there are always two cars
full of cheerful people in the city.
This benefactor is guard on the
Third avenue elevated, and he gets
more fun out of his trip from Bronx
park to Brooklyn bridge than all the
rest of the guards put together. The
minute you enter his car you are
struck with the smiles on the faces of
all the passengers and Immediately
you wonder what the joke is
Gazing on his audience stands the
cheerful guard with twinkle in his
eye, and as station comes in sight,
he says confidentially and with GER
tain air of mystery: Ladies and gen.
tlemen, this station is Fifty-ninth
street. For the first time everybody
is much pleased to know that It
is Nfty-ninth street, and there is .
laugh.
This guard has a voice capable Of
many infections, while his enuncia-
ton is SO startlingly perfect that a
combination. of the two is, a. the bill
boards say. amusing as well as in
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

NJ EW YORK.-The ending of the
~ Thaw trial will no doubt bring
relief to large number of people.
AS to the Justice Of the verdict the
consensus of opinion is that it was
practically the only one the jury
could return.
While the Matteawan Asylum for
the Criminal Insane is not the most
pleasant place in the world to live in,
there are also many less inviting
places. The distinguishing feature of
the asylum is the absepce of anything
in the extensive buildings or the broad
grounds that surround them to sug-
gest that the patient is in jail. Bar
ring few details rendered necessary
by consideration of the safety of the
inmates, the person who dwells there
might we'll think that he was in some
we'll ordered hotel, where he is spared
the necessity of work to meet the fire.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
.lp0|l|A|||I .VFEDS4
: MEN in as YEARS
MRS. TOWNSEND OF DODGE, NEs.,
r. z
GETS HELeMEETs CONFUSED :
= WHEN TALKING OF Them. ~-~
LOSES BUT FIVE BY DEATH
Two Spouses Were Colorado Men and
One Now Lives in Cripple Creek
advertised for Last
One.

Omaha, Neb. - Joseph Zoover,
Charles E. Ewing, John J. Suits, o. H.
Scott, Philip Moomaw, Charles Hitch
cock, D. c. Bigford, George w. Smith,
Henry Straw, Jesse Luman, Thomas
Birchell, Edgar Fenton, Charles Hen
shy, A. w. Townsend. Mrs. A. w.
Townsend of Dodge, Neb., has been
married to IA men within the last As
years. Above is complete list of
their names in the order in which she
married them. Her marriage to
Townsend, wealthy retired farmer,
has just been celebrated.
Mrs. Townsend became the wife of
Joseph Zoover, a Colorado miner,
when she was 13 years old, and before
she was II she was a mother and a
widow. Before she was Is she was
married to Ewing, and before she was
OF age she had had several husbands
and was the mother of a number of
children.
She is now 5S years old, and is a
Well-preserved and by no means un-
attractive woman
All but five of her II husbands are
living. All but two of the IA served in
the civil war;
Zoover, Suits, Scott, Bigford and
Smith are dead. Ewing lives in Cripple
Creek, Co..; Moomaw in Salt Lake
City, Hitchcock in Oakland, CAL;
Straw, Luman and Birchell in Council
Bluffs. Fenton in Seattle, and Henshy
In Dayton, o.
Mrs. Townsend has had so many
husbands that she sometimes expert
ences difficulty In recalling the names
of some of them. When she talks of
them she occasionally gets them con-
fused and has to stop and think to get
them straight in her mind. Their faces
she cannot always recall, either, nor
can she always recall clearly just what
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Money Carries Poison,

:
Notwithstanding the strong popular
prejudice against tainted money, it ia
noticed that most persons accept it
when It is offered, rather than. seem
rude. 1t is the same way with green
backs and coin which are cbjectiona-
Bile by reason of unp1easantness-why
not say frankly, dirt?-acquired
through long service. Cash in such
condition, whether paper or metal,
may be obviously filthy, and even dis
agreeable to the sense of smell, but it
is never refused. Once heard man
say: Il will take all the microbes that
come with a dollar bill, no matter how
many" This is undoubtedly the way
most folks feel about the matter, re-
marks Richard Benter in Technical
World Magazine. But undeniably the
microbes in question are frequently
legion. And, obviously, the older a
banknote or treasury certificate hap
pens to be, the greater the number of
germs it carries. Neither paper nor
any kind of metal is food for microbes.
Thus it may be considered that q note
fresh from the treasury or coin new
from the mint is practically sterile
that is to say, germ-free. But as soon
as money of either kind begins to pass
from hand to hand it ACQUIRES dirt and
thus becomes breeding ground for a
great variety of germs, some of which
are liable to be those of disease. An
exact study of the subject has been
made recently by the director of the
research laboratory of New York, who,
summing up his conclusions in a re-
port, states that, as shown by micro
scopic examination, an average piece
of paper money, moderately clean,
carries 22,500 bacteria. On an aver
age dirty bill there will be about 5000
bacteria. Most bacteria, 1t should be
understood, are harmless, but many
species are the germs of dangerous
diseases.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

HAS OH.-1u ne question: IQdL
w has been agitating the public
mind in Washington for some days has
been:
Who are we?''
No, 1t is not college yell; it is
the demand for information concern
ing the presidents meaning when he
abandoned his old friend "I' and
studded his message with refer
ences to ''we," "us," and "our policies"
The idea that the president meant
himself by we and was merely
adopting a royal fashion is secuted by
those who know the president and
are aware of his distaste for getting
into the low and vulgar class to which
mere kings belong. It is generally ac-
cepted that MI. Roosevelt was talking
in the plural.
Consequently there is much curios-
ity to learn the identity of the men,
bers of the 1--WE club" Careful in
quiry results in establishing the fact
that there are more of them than had
been believed. Here is a practically
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
WAS A LITTLE AFRAID.
When Bishop mackay.smith Thought
of the Three Days Grace.

When the Reverend DR.. Alexander
Mackay-Smith went to Philadelphia as
bishop coadjutor of the diocese of
Pennsylvania in the Episcopal church.
one of the first persons to entertain
him was a well-known banker. at
whose house Bishop Mackay-Smith
dined few nights after his arrival
in the city. AS they sat down at table.
the host asked the bishop to say grace.
with which request the visitor, of
course, graciously complied. Then.
the prayer over and the feast begun.
DR.. Mackay-smith looked up, smiling.
my dear SIR" said he, do you
know that was a little afraid to ask
a blessing, until I remembered some.
thing which had read in the papers
a short time ago."
"Afraid?" repeated the banker. "And
of what, pray?"
Yes, afraid insisted the bishop
until I recollected that the legislature
had just done away with your Penn
sylvania law, insisting upon a three
days grace"
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
IL" Road Boasts One CHEEKY Guard

structive. One might mistake Theis
that is his name-for friendly
guide pointing out the places of in
terest on Third avenue, for each sta
tlon is called out as if there were
some particular and charming interest
attached to it. Some are chanted in
monotone; some are sung on an
ascending scale; others are recited in
the most dramatic fashion, and the
passengers are truly sorry when they
hear the last number of the program
at city hall and the bridge. Would
there were more of him!
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

As st. Louis sociologist states that
among friends and brethren, as we all
ought to be, no thanks are needed for
past favors. we may owe no thanks
to John Smith of New York now that
he is no longer needed But still, as
the dictionary explains that thanks
are thinks" for the past with a prom
Use of future thought implied, there is
nothing in the dictionary to prevent
unlimited thanks to John Smith.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

ney troubles. Is that
relief lasting? Let
Mrs. James M. Long,
of 113 Augusta St.,
Staunton, Va, tell
you. OnJanuary 31st,
1903, Mrs. Long
wrote: "Doan's Kid
ney Pills have cured
me" (of pain in the
hack urinary trnll-
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

oles, bearing down sensations, etc.)
On June goth, 1907, four and one-half
years later, she said: Il haven't had
kidney trouble since. l repeat my
testimony"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Last Kiss in Coffin Saves Life,

Aspen, Col.-Just before the coffin
lid was to be fastened the mother of
John Classic, aged Is, pressed the
last kiss on his brow and saw faint
twitch of, his eyelids. She screamed
for help. Physicians soon restored
him to consciousness and are hopeful
Of q complete restoration to health.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

Wives of baseball fans who were
planning quiet and happy winter and
chance to see something of their
husbands are driven to the verge of
distraction by the continuous baseball
excitement.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

A Long Island man named Darling
is receiving congratulations upon the
advent of his twenty-seventh child.
Naturally, Mr.. Roosevelt will be dee
lighted over this crop of little dar-
lings.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

Though Japan has cut down the ap.
preparation for its army aud novy it
will still spend enough on those
weapons Of offense and defense to
make it a serviceable bogy man when
hysterical white persons need yellow
peril in their business.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

We appreciate the efforts Of the
actresses who are kissing against time
to elevate the stage and inject true
realism into art; nevertheless we have
always been told that it is quality
more than quantity which counts In a
kiss
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

THE Curse of Cleverness" is tho
title Of an article in an English maga-
zine. Only the lack of humor Of an
Englishman would instigate anyone to
pose as an authority upon such q sub.
iect.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
GLOOMY Outlook.

Long Winded Orator Towering hiS
voice to an impressive whisper)-
Have you ever, o, my friends. al
lowed yourselves to wonder where you
will be and what you will be doing
when another century shall have rolled
around?'
Wearied Auditor lin an equally i'm.
pressive whisper)-"Yes-we' still
be here waiting for you to finish your
speech!"
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Took Two to Beat Her.

Took Two to Beat Her.
Timkfns-Your wife seems to b0
quite fluent talker.
Simkins-You bet she is. neve1
knew her to be outtalked but once.
Timkins-Indeed!
Stmkins-Yes; and then 1t took tw4
other women to do it. -.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
SHE COULD NOT WALK
For Notwithstanding Humor on Ankles
-opates Alone Brought Sleep
eczema Yielded to Cuticura.

Il had eczema for over two years.
I had two physicians, but they only
gave me relief for a short time and I
cannot enumerate the ointments and
lotions l used to no purpose. My ank-
les were one mass Of sores. The itch
Ing and burning were so intense that
l could not sleep. l could not walk for
nearly four months. One day my hus-
band said had better try the Cuticura
Remedies. After using them three
times had the best nights rest in
months unless I took an opiate I
used one set of Cuticura Soap, Oint-
ment, and Pills, and my ankles healed
In a short time It is now year since
l used Cuticura, and there has been no
return of the eczema. Mrs. David
Brown, Locke, Ark, May 1s and July
~ 1907"
Women Not In Demand.
Mr.. Arnold Shanklin. just returned
from Panama, says that men who go
to Panama seem to think a wife one
Of the first necessities, but generally
they are provided with sweethearts,
who either come to them properly
chaperoned or they 60 back to tho
states for them. The government
builds nice six-room houses for the
married men, and there is very
pleasant social set being formed. He
did not seem to agree with Miss
Helen Varick Boswell that old maids
or bachelor girls are wanted there,
the inference being that the right
sort Of men are either married or
about to be when they go to Panama
Millions in Oats and Barley.
Nothing will pay you better for ,90e
than to sow plenty of big yielding oats
and barley with oats at 40c to SOC bu.
(Salzers new Emperor William Oats av
eraged 50 bu. per acre more than any
other variety in 1907 would pay immense
iy while Salzer's Silver King Barley which
proved itself the biggest yielder at the
Wisconsin Agricultural Station during
1907 if you had planted so acres would
have given you in 1907 just $4,000 on 50
acres. 1t is an enormous yielder.
JUST SEND THIS NOTICE AND 1Oc
to the John A. Salzer Seed Co., Ia
Crosse, Wis, and we will mail you the
only original seed catalog published IN
America with samples of Emperor vii.
liam Oats. Silver King Barley, Billion Dol.
lar Grass which produces IL tons per acre.
Sainfoin the dry soil luxuriator, etc, etc.,
and if you send l4c we add package Of
new farm seeds never before seen by you.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Camera Pest at the National Capital

of the trip. When they get back to
the starting place the pictures. print
ed and mounted, ready for them.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
Bio Sum for Charity

New York city will be required to
spend this year $2,2S7,944 for char.
ity, besides $685. for Bellevue and
allied hospitals.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21
THE TIME TEST.
That 10 What Proves True Merit.

Doan's Kidney Pills bring the quick.
est of relief from backache and kid.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

Does your wife talk in her sleep,
major?'
mo, I talk in her sleep-its tho
only chance l get"
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

New Name, Old Disease.
Ergophobta is q new disease. Its
chief symptom is q dislike for work.
The Virginia enterprise., 1908-02-21

Horse Oddly Named. ri
A Kentucky trotter is oddly named
Fot-oooooooo- ~. : -
Der Deutsche beobachter. [volume] (New Philadelphia, Ohio) 1869-1911, 1908-12-17
DaS ,.,eeard) iatt0 Get5t.re'
0efek.

Erohbem mix not 3pei WoAen einen
Nussu9 aus ben Giquoraefeben eebro9t.
.tuelhe uniere lsbte @eiebaebuna pailiri
bat. fheinen INNER nod piele au CLAUS
ben, oob unter benz ,9eard uno Sei=
aure" @eieB iebes priuatbaus elner
,tuiltarti9en Durdiuduns ourd bic
be3ablten Meenten Der Nnti> Saloons
Qiaa untermorfen lei ano man finoet
joaor in 3eitungen Noti3en, tpel1e li9
in oieier gDeiie ausipredsn. gir brin=
,aen oaber bier ben yBortlaut Der Set
tion 8 bes .Seard uno Sei3ure" 8e'
Iebes unb in 9etreuer ueberlebun9.
SECTION s. No warrant shall be
issued to search a private residence
occupied as such unless it or some
part of it is used as a store or
shop, hotel or boarding house, or
unless such residence is place OF
public resort.
6ettion 8. Rein Qausburdiudun9s=
befehl fell ausselteut luerben um eins
pripatmobnuna, Die als fol4e benub1
,lpirb, si burhiuden. ooer oieielbe
werbe Qon3 ober tbeil,peiie als 2aoen.
Wertfdtte. 0otel, Goitbaus ooer als
Elm .6ffentli9er Grbolun9splab Der.
tpenoet.
Der Deutsche beobachter. [volume] (New Philadelphia, Ohio) 1869-1911, 1908-12-17

lano. Nep sseriep. Maine unb Mafa.
6uietts. V. Die Dsntiden Der 4os
'Ionial3elt unter Beriidiidii9una ibres
politiihen. etbiiden. io3ialen uno ersie.
berilhen GinHuies. - vi. Nor0rins
aen Der Deutihen nod benz Weasn. -
VII. Die Deutihen I'M lnabbdn9ig.
teitss3riege. - VIII. GntpidlunQ nod
benz Grisae: Nadiat1en Der oeutihsn
Ginlpanoerrn9 uno Mufaeben Der
Heutibtn ineben gnaliiden. Die pem.
iploaniid= Geutlhen. Sobann @eore
Mapp uno feline NieoerlaGuneen. =
TX. 8ie Deutiden in Dem 3eitraum
pon 1915 b;s gum B,ginn bes Biiroer=
trieaes. = x. Die Deutiben in benz
3eitraum BON 1916 bis gum Beoinn
Oss girgertrieoes unter beionoerer Ye.
radiidti9una ibres politiiden. etbiiben.
ioslalen unb er3ieberiihsn @influGes. -
XI. Die Deutihen i'm Biiraertriee. -
XII. Die Deutfden bonn SdluB bes
Bnraertrieaes big in Die GeQenmart !:
u Das oeutihe @lement in ben Yerei.
n,atsn stauisu uno iein giniluB auf
pclliiidem @sbiete p auf etbiibem
@eblete b auf lo3ialem 8ebiete A.
oni erSieberiihem @ebiste a) 2moer-
aarten. b. 8Oltsidule. c) Oieb Sdool.
d. @ollese uno uniuerlitat. 81 @s=
meinoeldule (parohial SdoOlej. f)
5hurnunterridt. g Muiit, 8iteratur.
1bsater. biloenbe Runlt; 81 Die
neutide Stride AZ 4utberiide. b) Re
fosmierte. @ 0ereiniste Yrioer in
Sbrilto. d. goanaellide Spnooe bon
9loroamerita. e) gpaneeliihe @emein=
lbaii u. Yereiniate guanaeliide Stride,
| f, Wetbooiitiide. 81 Baptiltiide. h,
prtsbpterianiide. j Briioertirde. Wein=
arennianer, siebentae Nopentiiten.
5msoenbor0iauer. Sunter, Wennoni=
ten. oeutihe proteitantiihe Stride. Ky
Die Ratboliide. - XIII. Die DeutIhen
i'm ipanli1sameritaniiden Rrieqe. -
XIV. Ser oeutihe Sag. = XIV.
| 5d1IuR.