The Topeka state journal., 1908-01-30
HUA0p or THE Day

HU1NOR OF THE Day
Yer Honor protested the seedy pris-
ener. dis is Jist a case O police persecu-
Honor. YOU amt goin' to let EN- keep
me down. are your
days. ."-Philadelphia Press.
has gone up. The price of diamonds has
increased SO, my husband found where
he went to get me that necklace he had
prom,sed pr 1his 1a me: that he cant ahord IL at
Yes. it is certainly hard. I wonder
how poor people manage to live!'-Balti-
more American.
What do get for this stunt?' asked
the vain, but Axecrable amateur.
IF were a police magistrate answer
ed the manager, you would get 30 days,
but as I'm not you'll simply get out
Baltimore American.
Say. pa, won't you buy me a drum?'
No. I'm afraid you'd disturb me with
No. I won't. pa; I'll only drum when
$50; Archie. you have proposed to the
girl; have your
And what did she say?"
to her father
We'll, have you seen him?"
No; I'm a little dubious about that She
1t to him with-er-power to act.''
Chicago Tribune.
Sammy" said Germantown mother
recently to her youngest-born, when you
5hSss s y Of candy
mo. ma.am.'' replied sammy Il knew
they wouldn't come out even, so ate one
Defore l began to divide."-Harper's
80" "of course" said the analytical ques-
on both sides Of the QUESTION" 10 oe saio
Yes" answered Senator Sorghum.
that all public question is i fit for rI nova wa
days is to serve as the topic for a good
talk k'-Washington Star.
IT wouldn't give a straw for the man
VINO is continually drinking
Such man wouldn't use 1t II you did,
I'D like to speak to the boss, said the
Shes sea out today" to 1ne oooI eaId Mr. Hau.,..n
This is Thursday, you know: anythine
my wife or could do for You ?;'MPhiIass shs
Natica-Intrinsic value should never fig
ure In considering a Christmas gift.
+oI,nbes n6eoemat n never I does with me. What
should be willing to brave a crowd Of hoi-
iday shoppers Tor my sake.-Judge
First Litterateur-Have you completed
your edition Of that early twentieth cen
tury fellow, Punkpifle?
Second Observation-Disclosures. tbe hun
dredth volume is on the press -,
How are you going to wind it up?'
In the usual way-with his Life ana
sharpsonEI haven't much acquaintance
nrsh.P With sPun|jaii' but I'm not favorably. i'm
you?
Phlatz-For a ". senerally.-Chicago
Tribune.
Short got behind with nv rent this
month. Gould you let me have SO?
LongCGot behind with your rent, eh?
Chicago Daily News. =
Nell-They say Miss Topnote won Mr
Gotrox with her voice
Bel, SeilerBut -1 she sings terribly.
NeH-Ihat Just it. He told her If she
would never sing again he would marry
her.-Philadelphia Record
school teacher. ''can you tell me what y
Sure" replied Willie. "a prophet is
one of those fellows who's always soin'
around lookin' for a chance to saw II told
you so'."-Philadelphia Press 0
do you blame a man for wear,ps
monocle if he wants top
NO" answered Miss Cayenne ssput T
blame him for wanting o''-Washineton
Star. ''.'
Grandma-Have you wasted anv time to
day, Margaret? e "
Margaret-Yes, indeed I PLAYED br,dea
all the afternoon with only one pack Of
1N VI
Sadly the pickpocket surveyed the inter
lor of a fat purse. Nothing but samples"
he muttered rs there no honor among
n?"-Philadelphia Public Iedeer