Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-12-16


when . fellow will have to be mighty
careful about opening bureau drawers
when his wife Is III the room II he
doesn't want to be scared into con
niptiOn when she notices what he's
doing. Ysee, this is just about the
beginning Of the season when wives
start to hiding the Christmas presents
they've bought for their husbands.
Funny gag, that, too
Then there's another thing about
this Christmas present hiding bust
ness. Most men stick 1t out that Won
en- are the curious, inquisitive sex,
don't they? Wen, / don't believe st.
In my opinion men are a whole heap
more curious and inqutsitive than
women Fact is, know It.
For instance, a husband, long
about this season that's approaching,
is cropping around for a fresh shirt
upon getting up IN the morning. He
yanks out the wrong drawer Of the
bureau. Wen, on this morning he
pulls out the bottom bureau drawer,
say, and his wife, who is fixing
her hair at the chiffonier IN an
other part OF the room, catches him
in the act just in time, lets out her
little sQuawk, and races over to the
bureau and pushes the drawer shut
so it's there, hey? he says to
her 'Scuse me for living and then
the mullethead goes on grinning like
a chimpanzee while he brushes his
hair. Then he turns to her.
" 'Watchoo got in there, anyway?
he asks her.
she tells him, with a grimacs,
and very properly, that it's none Of his
business. And she adds something
about folks that rubber
But say. g'wan and tell me what
choo got in there. won't your he tries
again, wheedlingly.
Whereupon his wife makes mention
Of that feline that met an untimely
end through Curiosity
That's an right about the cat
says the husband then, BIT III bet
you new rubber plant that it's cigars
that you've got in there And then
. he begins to look a bit alarmed. Say,
/ hope not, though I'm thinking about
swearing of smoking soon now, any
how
but this hint Of his about he ci-
gars doesn't get the least bit Of q
rise out Of her Not much. Nothing
whatever doing in the conversational
line on her part.
"'Oh. I'm a pinhead, sure enough,
her husband says then, after q pause,
and still consumed and Just eaten
alive BY curiosity. might have
known all the time that it's shaving
outfit That's exactly what 1t is, for
a sure thing
However, his wife most carefully
adjusts her side combs and quite re-
trains from talking. Then he sticks
his hands into his trousers pockets
and looks her over Quizzically.
law. come on, now, like good
girl. and tell me If you've gone and
got me that bath robe that we were
looking at in the shop window the
other afternoon, he says to her in his
most persuasive tone.
Say, Minnie, you might let fel-
Ter see what you've got tucked In
there, at that
Just compare the attitude OF the
average husband in this Christmas
gift business with the position OF his
wife on that same subject. She doesn't
really want to know what he is going
TO give her for Christmas. She wants
to be 's'prised'
Look, here, hun, he says TO her
some morning along toward Christmas
usually he puts It on till about the
last day, when everything is all picked
over ia the stores-'Look a-here, my
dear whatchoo want for Christmas,
hey? It's up to you, you know?
why. the very idea? she exclaims.
I'm 10 me! Preposterous! Why, 1t
wouldn't be any Christmas gift at all
II I told you what | wanted you to
get for me
"'Oh, that's one way Of looking at
it, he says. But, dye know. was
thinking about getting you
"sh-sh-sh! Stop she cries Don't
you dare tell me, Jack Costing. Don't
you dareu
"All the same, she's foxy, at that.
After a while an idea strikes her.
"'You know, Of course, Jack, she
says, musingly, that II you are wor-
ried about the sizes Of things, why,
your sister Agnes and ] wear exactly
the same sizes fl everything, and
/ she
But. nix, he breaks IN. It isn't
anything that comes in sizes. It's one
OF those
And again her fingers 60 into her
ears. The 's'prise Is the whole thing
to her, and she is resolved not TO hear
~ advance what he is thinking OF get
| ting for her.
NOW, if all this doesn't come pretty
near proving that women are really
less curious than men, then dunno, I
dunno, hey?"