Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1908-01-17

imam tney ever were III tuclT lives.
Standing pat il often more or less a
standing joke.-P.-I
A sitting bluff" would be nearer
the truth.
Beauties often die old maids. They
set such a value on themselves that
they don't find u purchaser till the
market is closed.
Why should the editor of a country
paper be asked to give space free any
sooner than the merchant should be
requested to give his wares away?
In Seattle it is declared the Pr
will support John F. Miller for the
Office of Mayor. If it does, Miller
will be elected by a large majority.
Wait and see.
It's strange but Oftimes true.
When 4 contractor buys stone he
doesn't expect coal, and when buy
coal don't expect stOne-but l get
it just the same.
Isn't it disgusting and detestable
to see q man buying Mumm's at 81
per bottle. when his wife has to stand
the druggist off for bady's nursing
bottle? | say, isn't it disgusting
and detestable?
We all know McGinty, years ago,
Went to the bottom of the sea,
But he's not so sad or lonely
As you really think he'd be.
For deep down in the ocean.
Whora fhav ho Va M r,ca for In unnu
He found many busted merchant,
Who on Earth used rubber stamps.
asked a friend of mine the other
day if he believed the world was di
vided into two classes who
borrow and those who lend. No
l don't" he answered. My ex.
perience is that two other classes are
much more prevalent - those who
want to borrow and those who don I
lend.
There are lO-cent politicians in the
Evergreen State who are always
ready to ridicule James Hamilton
Lewis, who would gladly give their
interest in the great white Throne
could they assume his position for q
f1eeting moment, amongst the noted
and celebrated political leaders Of
the United States.
Teddy" with his Car ideals
would from his letters criticising
Admiral BrOwnson, use his big
stick" in order TO compel man
holding government position to
hou o,, ho,IaJ l,~n., <ho% ln ,,1;xI, 4
resign. Out with such Overbearing,
detestable ideas in our own dear
United States, the land of the free
and the home of the brave.
Yes" said the small boy to
the reporter, who was looking for
news, Mother fell down stairs and
broke three legs"
''Pshaw! What do you take me
fOr?' cried the reporter. Your
mother hasn't got three legs"
Il didn't say she had" re-
torted the boy. The legs belonged
to the table mother fell against; she
WASH hurt at all. "
The other day q gentleman entered
an Olympia restaurant and ordered
chicken for dinner. The chicken
proved difficult subject to diSsect,
and the customer, in o passion,
rOared to the waiter:
Waiter, this chicken is con-
foundedly tough"
Very sorry, but that bird always
was peculiar. Why, when We came
to kill it, we couldn't catch it, and
at last it flew on the roof and we had
to shoot it and -"
20, that accounts for it. You
must have shot the weather cock by
mistake!''
A couple Of Eastern tourists en-
gagged an Olympia man last week, to
act as bOatman while they fished.
Now the Olympia man is fOnd-well,
in fact, he loves-"bug juice" espec-
tally when on q fishing expedition.
The tourists were most assiduOus in
their efforts to catch fish, but never
once asked their bOatman to have O
drink. After a heavy shower OF
rain, one Of the fishers failed to
strike o match, every place being
wet, and at length he inquired some.
what impatiently:
Is there no dry place about
where l might strike light?"
Try my tOnguc!" said the Olym.
pia boatman, and the fishers took the
hint.
There is one great, grand and Clio.
rious thing to be said OF Thomas NJ.
Vance, and that is that he is q genu.
inc Democrat yesterday, to-day
and forever. Here is an extract
from his speech at the Jackson Ban.
quet, in Seattle, last week:
II am allowing no credit to any Re-
publican whom God ever allowed to in.
fest His footstool. l am not going "a
allow any credit TO the Republican Pres
ident. for what he has done, He would
not have done it il he could have helped
it.. am uot going To fall down and wor'
ship the administration which was elect,
Cd with corporate money, and then
turned on the corporations in times oil
their trouble and said, See how righte'
Gus amt
my policy is: Every time Republi,
can gets within your reach, hit him on
the head with club, II there il one han.
dy; il there isn't. take the weapon that,
handiest."
Will men protesting to follow the
banner OF one political party, who
wear Joseph's coat, please sit uI
and take notice. II you are Repub,
lican, be one. II you are o Democ
crat, be one. That's all.
have received a copy of the regu
lar annual number Of the White Rive,
Journal. 1t is o handsome piece oil
work, and reflects great credit on it,
editor and publisher, J. d. Dean
There is not much profit, as a rule, te
he gained by issuing such o number
and it is q case of plenty of worry,
troubles and work, and then some