The sun., 1908-09-13

SUNDAY, SEPIEMbEN
mat, and I'd like TO have you tell mt
the name of one married man Of oui
acquaintance who sticks around with htl
wife more when she's sick than do
Oh, knew you couldn't name one. You
can say all sorts OF Internal nasty things
my dear, but whom you're cornered, why
you crawfish into your cave cave Ike Ike, az y
get into the habit OF coming right out
and saying things instead Of beating
around the bush the way you do, getting
those knocks out Of your system In that
slinky way that gives you chance 70
hedge when your words are put right
How's that2 Your smelling Dottlei
Where Ia it2 In what drawer Of tie chif-
fonier? That's a great place 70 keep q
smelling bottle, isn't itl Right hand cor.
nerof the top drawer did you sayp DANCED
II can find Il. There's o whole lot Of hair,
pins and powder puifs and hair nets and
phony hair puffs and junk like that scat- scat
salts bottle In here, why. I'll eat IL. Never
mind, nowl Stay where you are III find
the blamed thing II 1t takes week. Howi
that' Oh. I'm not to pull tnis litter Of fool
things out OF the drawer, eh2 Well. how
the deuce dye expect me to find the con-
founded thing. then7 Dye expect me to
go hire q searchlight to explore the mest
q, IF stuff In here and and jgrope around IN II
Well. it isn't In this drawer, that's all
there Is to 1t! Don't lie there and tell me
that IL is, for it Oh, what's thisp le
this II? Well 1t was underneath about
nineteen tons of handkerchiefs and rouge
rabbits feet and rats Mat you stun your
hair with and that kind Of measly stun: =,
=
cure your headache2 That's like woman
too. She takes every situation In life
hind end foremost The cause Of head
ache, as / think I've mentioned once OF
twice before, lies In a disarranged
stomach and nowhere else. and here
you think that you can help the darnea
thing by breathing something through
your, nose out OF q bottle. II tnat isn
like a woman! Women have never got
very far away from their cave dwelling
ancestors, anyhow. wouldn't be In
chs least surprised to see you rubbing
a tigers tooth or some other kind OF an
famulet or charm to get rid OF q headache.
You ought to have q Siwash totem pole
set up In your room here, 30 tnaI every
fleet before IL and humble some kind Of
an incarnation about laundering winds
and cascading water and all that, and
then you'd be cured just as quick as scat
-ye-eh. -,
bully gang around at his place for that
poker game tonight. That Jorkins fel-
up a little feed for the boys when they
play cards at his apartment. Darned
smart woman, Mrs. Jorkins. and Jorkins
was the lucky scoundrel to grab her Oh.
Some yaps do have a lot Of luck. anyhow.
Jorkins is a nice chap and al that. @ pot
he doesn't know much moro than the law
allows, and yet he nails one Of the finest
little women on earth for wife. and. gee,
but she's healthy proposition. too
Jorkins was telling me only tho other
day that his wife has never had sick day
since they were married. and they've
beer married seven years. too. Guess
she knows how to take care Of herself
Must be that.
ANYHOW, as was saying, she sure
does know how to frame up little inter.
mission feed when they have the .pokel
game over there. She's got a knack
FOR such things-that's the only way
can explain 1t. And knack's Unborn
She had some barbecue and cream
cheese as part Of the iittle ,s eats nloTon ,Sou,
that can taste yet. 1t certainly wa,
immense. Say, why don't we ever have
| anv bar-le-duc In this house? Did yot
ever hear Of It? Gooseberry jelly. yot
know. How's that2 We have had u
oftenp Well, DANCED II ! can remembe
ever seeing it around here, and it's funny
that I'D forget y. too;
how to ornament q table 30 nicely. too
Everything's as dainty rs q new parasol
| Her table always looks as II she spent [
little time at the job OF fixing things vi
instead Of turning q sort Of q handspring
and chucking the stun on the table ever!
WHICH way. No wonder the gang TX
Hi-huml Feeling any betterl oh
well, maybe you'll get to sleep after all
/ was thinking that after you got to sleep
il you think you'll get to sleep. why.
huhP Oh. kind O. hate to 60 whe'
you're feeling 80 Punksa hum nnn. You 9hst sn9'
could count me In for sure thing, 70
he made me promise faithfully to b
on hand to make up the seven in tn
game, but I'd feel mean and ornery II
went when you re feeling so bad; homes
would. Huh2 You'd rather I'd go
Well, that's burned nice and unselfish o
feel about it. I like to stick around an
sort o. soothe you when, you're dow
with one of these headaches, my dear
and I'd feel like a loafer II / skunk ou
and left you alone here. especially to g
to a poker party. Couldn't call Mre
Gabbsky down from upstairs to sit wit
you for while? Huh? You'd rather
be alone?
Well. I'll tell you. hun. IL you positiyel.
insist upon my going over to the Jor
kinses, why!of course I'll Co., because
don't want to stick around here II IT,
going to keep you awake. and imagin
that y QUILL be asleep after while. any
how. Well then. my dear. as long
along, but won't stay over there 50 lat
as usual. Now take 1t easy and I'll b
back in few hours after win all Of tn
money In the world. Bye bye, kid. Be
have while I'm gone!
Swiss Fuel Tests.
From Casters Magazine.
| In Switzerland there Ia a national Fed