Los Angeles herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1900-1911, 1908-02-09
TIME THIEF WORRY OF
BUSINESS MEMS LIVES
Minutes. Hours, Days and Weeks Are
the PIunder of This Criminal.
Tries to Cheer Up His
Victims


He is known among his acquaInf<
ances-and about everybody knows him
las the time thief. Not that he relieves
his friends Of their watches; that
wouldn't be so bad, because watches
can be replaced, but the time thief
takes what can never be recovered OF
duplicated--minutes and hours, and
days and weeks. which do not belong to
him. Unlike the ordinary thief who
steals from those who have the most OF
what he covets, the time thief steals
the golden moments from those who
have the fewest to spare.
The time thief is not ordinarily
bad sort of fellow. But for his per-
nicious habit of taking what does not
belong to him he might be a good citt-
zen and an ornament to society. The
modus operandi of this foe to industry
constitutes the peculiar enormity of hiN
offense, for he carries on his nefarious
business openly and cheerfully. fully
persuaded that he il an angel Of be-
neficence to his fellow men.
He elbows" breezily into the office OF
his victim at the busiest hour of tho
day and this is what takes place:
"Hullo, old chap" says the time
thief, shaping his victim on the back.
"There you are, with your nose at the
grindstone again. You'll peg out one of
these days and never know you've been
alive"
How are you2" returns the victim
with forced politeness, for of course II
Is impossible to kick the time thief
you'll excuse me If finish what I'm
at here-awfully busy this afternoon
BUSY nothing" says the time thief
jovially. you only think you're busy.
Nothing but habit old man, nothing at
all but habit. If ! didn't drop In every
day or two to Jar you out of your rut
don't know what would become OF
you. Now, just chuck that pen while
I'm here and put your feet up on the
desk. Got little story / want to tell
you"
, But the victim, who has been through
all this before. laughs as politely as
possible and keeps on with his work.
Ii the time thief didn't have a hide as
thick as an alligator he'd take the hint
and ramble out. But such a course never
occurs to him. Being a time thief. he
won't go until he has obtained enough
plumber to make it worth his while.
accordingly he pianks himself down in
chair puts his feet on the desk and
tells his little story. The telephone
rings, visitors arrive to transact BUSH
ness with the victim, the Office boy
comes In with papers for him to sign
These are very annoying interruptions
for the lime thief, but they do not dis
courage him to the point of giving up
his attack He always begins again az
the point where he left off and carries
his story through to the end--and be-
Gins another.
The time thief never has any business
of his own, and never can see why any
body else should have any.
LOOK at me-" he says boastfully. II
look twenty years younger than you do
now, ane I'll live that much longer than
you. All because / know how to live.
Well, SO long for now; I'll drop in again
tomorrow and cheer you up again."
Although tho time thief boasts that
he knows how to take things easy, It
would he worth while to have him
tackled by another time thief. The
chances are that he would see things
in a different light for once. But the
effect would only be temporary and he
would pounce on his victim with all the
more delight at the next opportunity.
In all probability the time thief Will
last while time lasts.