davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
TWO CURES FOR seAsickMEss.
Sailor Endorses One That He Consider
the Genuine Article.

"Speakin' Of seasickness." said the
sailor. Il once seen . very seasick man
settin' in deck chair starin' hard 1t
q photograph.
"'Wotss the idear o that dodge?' I
says to him.
Sure cure for seasickness,' says
he. Fix your thoughts on zone one
you hate. and the qualms pass OF. I
feel better Already he says, gulpin'
a swallerin'.
Another time I seen . hypnotist do
a good business on the long southern
run from New York to Naples. Every
time the sea roughed up. this here
chap hypnotised them that felt them
selves gettin' sick. and he fetched 'em
round again with the return O. smooth
weather. That there hypnotism was
the nearest thing to . genuine cure for
seasickness that's ever come under
my observation"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
SAVED MERCHANT FROM Ru,ss


A Washington treasury omeial Who
has just returned from New York tells
= story illustrative Of the effort Of J.
Pierpont Morgan. the New York nnan-
cier. to stop the financial depression.
A Jewish manufacturer had been
operating his business for ZONE time
on credit. His notes fell due early
in November. and he went to . hank
to get them renewed. Though he had
been a large depositor and vas known
to be . man Of scrupul0us honesty.
the bank declined to grant him IN ex-
tension. insisting that he should pay
his notes on the day they fell due.
This was impossible. and bankruptcy
stared him In the face. He went to .
friend and asked him what he
should do.
mo bank will loan you . cent" said
his adviser. II have 1t. Go to Nj.
Morgan and state your cas- to him."
"Oh. he won't do anything for me-"
the manufacturer responded hopeless
ly. But I'll try. anyhow"
Mr.. Morgan received him courteous
ly and listened to his statement. Then
he turned to his phone and rang up
the bank.
MI. So and So II In my ONCE" he
said, and tells me you have declined
to grant him an extension Of his notes.
1t Is just such people n you who are
making the condition serious. Unless
those notes are renewed. I shall make
1t my business to ruin you"
Then the lnancier turned to his
caller.
Il think" he said. "you win hnd the
bank willing to extend your notes.
1t vas
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

aepartee q the Shop.
II never wa 30 insulted in my life!"
said the girl with the brown eyes in
disnantly.
Explain further" was the request.
why. you know Fid0 chewed up
the mum to that set of gray furs Of
mine, and so l went into . shop to
day to see II ! could fnd q mum that
would suit. SO he called another clerk.
This one hunted high and low. he
dragged out NUTS till they heaped
the counter. but he couldn't ind one
that would match. Finally he called
the proprietor. a fat. stuffy man. who
came waddling down the aisle and
said: What il the trouble?
II cant make . match I said H.
most tearfully.
why. that's funny he said. In q
hatefully patronizing manner. What's
the matter with the men,"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
Great PtanIst Works Hard.

How conscientious are the great
musicians who enjoy the favor Of the
public was recently shown in the case
Of Ignace Paderewski, who. the day
before he played his sonata here.
spent Y hours ut the piano in
practice and consented to leave It only
when he realized he would be too
fatigued to play in public II he did not
have rest. Although the pianist IL In
robust health this year his Of life
Is Is out Of the ordinary - ever. He
never goes to bed until three O'Clock
in the morning. He plays the piano
until IL or II. then reads and spende
the rest Of the night until bedtime In
smoking cigarettes and writing let.
ters. He usually rises 1t nooa Al
that he gets Of exercise II ct the piano
Or when he 10 playing billiarda-N.
7. Sun.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
NOW TALK OF ovER.EDUcATioN.
Complaint In Germany That lt 10 Made
Too Accessible.

In Germany there is a strong move
ment against overeducation Of the
masses. The complaint Is that too
many schools Of various kinds exist
and that education Ii made too accesst-
BILE. The result IL an intellectual
proletariat"- large and growing
class Of educated men for whom there
are no places In the professions and
the various services Of the state. The
salaries or earnings Of engineers, ply
sicians. lawyers. teachers. architects,
and 20 on, have steadily decreased by
reason Of excessive competition or
~oversupply Of the market. The teach
ing profession. in particular, is o con-
gested that men have to wait years
and years for permanent positions.
with the benefits connected with them.
And It II . fact that this Intellectual
pr~0letariat" furnishes thousands Of
recruits to the social democracy. the
party Of discomfort and radical ideas
about social reorganization.-Los An
geles Times.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
LAUNCHED the NEW AUTHOR.
Magazine Writer Tells u the "0is-
eovery" Of Bret tiaste.

A copy Of the Overland Monthly had
fallen into my hands. and / was ex-
ceedingly interested in . sketch. The
Luck Of Roaring Camp" by an author
whose name I had never before heard.
I asked Mr.. Fields to read 1t, and he
cared more for 1t eve than 1Ebeing
much older and wiser-and he very
s0o dictated . letter to Mr.. Harte.
begging him to send something to the
Atlantic Whose editors. 80 far ~ I
have known them. have always
anxiously watched for promising new
authors).
The reply. which anne In due time.
I think, not only expressed . willing
ness to become q contributor. but
spoke Of the writer's probable depar-
ture from California. l cannot say
how long it was before the Harte fam
fly reached Boston and became the
guests Of Mr.. Howells in Cambridge.
I only know that It was the time when
every man was quoting from The
Heather Chinee." and generally carry
ing the verses In his pocketbook.
There was. I thought. q good deal OF
curiosity felt about the once rs to the
sort of man the suddenly popular
author would prove to be. He VA
found good looking land exceedingly
we'll dressed), extremely self-p0s-
sessed. with q gracefully friendly and
even aifectionate manner to the new
A.-R------A ARA----
his own age In the establishment. with
whom he speedily became intimate
Atlantic Magazine.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

The following pretty story Of Nine
Teresa Careno. the pianist. il told by
one Of her pupils. Just returned from
abroad: It was after the perform
ance Of the Grieg concerto in London
by Mme Careno. The audience was
storming. Suddenly q voice called out
Bravo. Bravo. I have never heard It
played better" Nine Careno gracious
~ acknowledged the compliment. but
was visibly annoyed when the pos
essor Of the voice. IN old man, kept
repeating It three or four times. The
old man apparently noticed the
artists disapproval Of his impulsive
action. He got up from his seat and
said: We'll. I ought to know what I
an talking about because I wrote this
concerto myself" Nine Careno had
failed to recognise in the little old
man Norvay's greatest composer. I'd
ward 0EjeG
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
IHippophaQy.

Hippophagy being in low water In
these later days, somebody has set
himself to show what an exceedingly
respectable history attaches to the
practice. Among the sncients, especial
~ in China, eating horse flesh was
general. and it was only killed In Eu-
rope by q papal decree OF Gregory III.
though Why horse hesh should have
been ~interdicted does not appear. 1t
was only the famine caused by Ma
p0leon's invasion that revived the
practice in Germany. where It has
survived ever since.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
NooeA

People sometimes lose their noses by
disease or In fights. and some have lost
them In war. For noseless persons
the most appropriate organs are said
to be Of wax. and the best ones. &C
c0rding to IN American Journal, cost
about f35. though . really good one
can be got for els. A nose made Of
papier mache may be bought for one
pound sterling. Noses made Of this
material are enameled and are decep
tive, and for a poor man they are said
to answe all the purposes that are 10
Quired.-LOndon Answers.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Az Cannon Invented 10 Drive Mists
Away frem London.

A scheme to disperse fogs by cur
rents Of air shot ove London from
projectors" six miles away has been
laid before the public control commit
tee Of the London county council. and
n. Demetrio Moggiora. the inventor.
IL resdy to start experiments.
N. Moggiora says his apparatus has
already been subjected to severe tests
At Milan. Italy. where fogs. clouds and
hailst0rms were quickly dissiDated
With his projectors. q lair cannon"
placed within . radius Of six miles
from the house Of parliament. he says
he win clear away the worst fog In
London within 20 minutes.
The theory il that the fog hangs
owe London simply because there are
NO air currents to carry 1t away" said
n. Moggi0ra. Now. my projectors.
acting like cannon. furnish the neces-
sary currents Of air."
Each protector. says the London
Daily Mail. 10 about 60 feet long. An
explosion is caused ~ in . cannon.
and the conclusion has IN effect for
six miles. Thus, II ten or more Of
these we're ranged over London from
different directions the fog would be
lifted Immediately to IN altitude where
the wind would blow 1t away. After
the apparatus was permanently in
stalled the cost would be seven pence
for each explosion. and 20 explosions
would rid the metropolis of its densest
forg. The cost for original construc-
ton would be $500
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
Economical Commodore.

Il was the custom in the days Of
our old navy for the men to bring to
the mast all WORKOUT articles which
were to be inspected, handed in, and
exchanged for new. The drummer
had applied for 30 many drum-heads
that the commodore felt sure he was
being imposed upon. and n day set
himself to watch while the band was
playing. AZ one rafting martial air
followed another. his anger increased
perceptibly, until he burst forth In
uncomfortable rage: There now,
coafound you! I e Why you use %
many drum-heads! Don't drum in the
middle Of It all the time. Drum all
over that drum, I tell you"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Il have to work awfully hard these
days." said the business Wo0an, In
order to help ny naa friends. You
have no idea how maay q then come
to me for help. I 0oa't know Why.
unless Il n because I eenerally keep
. great appearance Of being Wsll-to-
do. l had . letter this morning from
One Of them that Just about broke ny
heart. asking for . little money. No.
He isn't . borrower. He . one Of
the brainiest Of men I know. Who II
all at once up against It O account
Of the financial stringeney. nd hAan't
. dollar to his name. Of course I
sent him the money. There va
nothing else to do But I Woader
sometimes whom I could ask for cid
II I needed II - badly - that"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

G0odart-Brewder was telling me to-
day about his hard luck last spring.
He certainly did lose . great opportu-
nifty.
Wise-Yes. and think Of what he's
lost since.
Coodart-Why, what's that?
Wise - Valuable time talking
about IT.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

At the time q the famous Eastman
trial in CambriAoe. Mass. two Irish
men. standing On . street e0rner, were
overheard discussing the trial. Ono
Of them was trying to- enlighten The
other concerning . jury.
"Bedad!" he explained. You're a.
risted. Thin II 70 gets II sAnaEteat
lawyer. ye're innoeint; hut II n other
man gets tn best lawyer. ye're guilty"
Life.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

During . spell Of bad weather. vhea
the water supply VA unusually muddy.
. young woman Of Philadelphia asked
d.. 8. Weir Mitchell. The fAmous ~
thor and physician. how sAe could bsst
safeguard herself In drinking The lOcal
beverage.
First boil It." Dr.. Mitchell a.
swered. then filter II. and aftsrvarI
drink SINGER Ale"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Fish the Enemy o. MooqWseoe1.
The blue eye" 20 called On account
Of the brilliant blue Of It's iris. 70 q
small Ash one and . half to two inches
long. living in shallow Australian Va
ters. but the creature has been made
very big In importance BY the diseov-
cry Of Count Burger Noernef. Swedish
consul. that II subsists O mosquito
larvae. After some dimeulty. enough
Of the fishes have been captured and
sent to Naples to test their possible
influence in altering the condition Of
the malarious swamps and marshes Of
Italy. To science the Ash II known -
Psendomugil signiner. and II belongs
to the family Of Athorinides. repre-
scented in different parts Of the world
BY IA principal kinds and 6 sub
varieties. which win b eagerly inves-
tigAted II the Italian experiments sues
ceed.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

DooeSl
DO you believe that everybody has
one novel n him."
Il dol't know. But judging non
tho 1umber Of books constantly TUNED
oct / should ny tAae etesybody ~
10vO0 - ~"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

beautiful outdoor life, for the most
part It TsarskoeIS elo. always with .
powerful guard OF soldiers and secret
police agents just beyond their range
q vision. Il II . wonder that the poor
lfttlo grand duke, who II the heir to
de dignity Of car. ID not already
overwhelmed BY his title. His greatest
~ b Me ct present (he 10 nearly
tAreeAndahalf) u . golly-wog dressed
q blue and red, for possession Of
vAieA ~ occasional1y tights with hia
yuunesst sister. Princeos Anastasda,
vho = 0tx pears Old
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Mrs. Viewed (excitedly--O. Henry!
I've just discovered Why your poems
r always returned by this maya
zine!
A.r. Viewed e nearpoet)-1ndeed?
Mrs. Newed-Yes, indeed! Why.
here's the answer In plain print: mo
contributions win be returned unless
stamps are furnished" and you. you
old goose, always send the stamps!
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Greed grows With grovsllnG. and
come men have . positive se1ius for
It. Witness the millions that they are
piling mp to 10 good end. and for 10
great purpose. These millions speak
veil for their greed n anything eaA
speak well Of greed -aDd this - the
only tribute that vim ever b paid to
them-that they succeeded well In
what they started out to Do. Al Wit
nssses to their success they can call
the ghosts Of ruined Dea. hungry
women and starving eAildren. and
there win b - ooe 10 dispute their
testimony. Such = materialism In ~
eomm0nest form and in its eoarsest
aspeet-Joel Chandler Harris. In
Uncle Remus' NaGnzine.
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

Time" remarked the wise person.
'is money"
Perhaps" answered Mr.. Sirius
Barker. but It shouldn't b brought
to the attention Of some banks i have
heard Of. Instead Of Clearinghouse
certificates. they may find It comfort
able and convenient to issue eight-day
clocks"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

A citi3en Of Tennessee recently built
. handsome country home o. Lookout
mountain In bungalow style. Some q
his frie1ds. anxious to see the new
residenee. inquired the way u . party
Of small boys and girls. saying: Can
you show 10 the way 10 Mr.. ca
house?'
Yes. sir" was the response. but
e ion't Q house."
What ID II, then?'' Quissed one Of
Tie gentlemen.
Why. It's a-lts g." stammered
the boy. ITS . boomerang!"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

The gxeWoo Soe NoW eie4jo0.
The taste has changed. q rather ~
u1ss have changed. md Win ~
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

II suppose that success IN a eam-
paign depends q e3eetlooeering!"
Somewhat" answered Senator Sor.
Ghum. Who va h . particularly
3ocooe mood: and somewhat a eel.
leetiooeerinG!"
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

sYoa do0't seem to care nn.al Ao>
ooeSsty, Mr.. Crabbe." said Niss
Woody.
NO" replied Crsbbs. "seeisty u
simply . foolish hstitutjum IN vhaoh
ven r"hody = 0aghe . " = -
oo0ooody.s
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26

BEoasoa-What makes you think n,
Vim kAve N open winter?
Wao00oa-Ay VITO has just pur.
chased N e1DeaGtvo cot Of furs,-
The Columbus journal., 1908-02-26
REASONING
It OUT

NY, what . loud o0e!" whispered
Herbert
They ut up straight and listened
Tor netheeIs approaching footsteps. but
not q drum Was heard, not . funeral
note.
Gertrude put her head back on Her
bert's shoulder.
Mother didn't hear" she giggled.
ITS . WONDER" said Herbert. 1T
sounded like IN old COW pulling her
foot out oe Q swamp"
Louder than that" said Gertrude;
N sounded like Old Bob the hickman
eAirplng his horse. and when old Bob
chirps his horse. you know, you can
hsar him Ill over town"
Yes; I know" said Herbert. but
sven %. he doesn't chirp his horse n
losd - . COW pulls her foot out OF .
swamp"
ia Hike to know Why mott"
TT stands to reason. OF course. Old
Bob makes . loud noise when he
eAirps his horse; well all admit that;
but when m old COW pulls her foot out
q . swamp It just naturally stands to
reason that she m make more noise
than ever Old Bob could"
mo, Herbert"
Yes, 0~ertrude.~
No. Herbert"
YES. Gertruds.ss
NO"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1908-11-29
2O1S Second Ave.

of the marines-that OF doing police duty
on the ships and of preventing the orgn-
ization of mutineers.
Go tell it to the Marines an express
sion of comomn usage, had its origin in
the contempt of the sailormen for the
ships infantry.
In the British navy the marine corps
was established In 1864 and has been sew
eral times abolished and restored. The
institution of the corps in the United
States service dates from June, IT'S, and
there has never been a disestablishment
though the marines practically disap-
peared for the period following the Rev
olution, when the navy also faded away.
Our marines have fought CALAMITY In
China, Japan, Corea, the Bahamas, Tri-
poll. Egypt, Sumatra, Peru. and Hawaii.
Some OF them were at New Orleans with
jackson. They distinguished themselves
at Chapultepec in the Mexican war, and
later hoisted their colors in the City of
Mexico They kept the peace at Pana-
ma in 1886 and were the body guard of the
present republic of Panama at its birth.
In the Spanish war they did yeoman's
service. Nineteen times they have re-
ceived the thanks of Congress.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1908-11-29
THE THOLOGIAN
VERSUS SCIENCE

1t is not going too far to say that the
large minded, finely trained, catholic
souled preacher or theologian who claims
the man of science as his colleague, well
comes his researches and halls his dis
coveries, is the rare exception, says the
Rev. Charles f. Aked d. D., in Apple
tons for December, in the fifth of the
series of his widely discussed article,
1.-THE Salvation of Christianity" The
general rule is for the preacher to pos
sess the barest smattering Of scientific
knowledge, and to be ready on every oc-
casion with a sheer directed against-he
knows not what, but it is enough for him
that it emanates from men whose learn
ing is greater than his own. Science,
falsely so Called is the quotation too
often on his lips He talks about $50
wrathful person who grew scornfully ell
oquent about 'this so-called twentieth
century" Who is there familiar with
the life of churches who has not been
made sick at heart by the denunciation
of science on the part of half-educated
preachers? Who has not seen the look
of disgust on the face of some intellect
ual young man or woman and lost-it was
doubtless a gain-the preachers next sen-
tenc or two in wondering whether perma-
nent injury had not been done to that in
preacher would not eventually pass into
contempt for the preachers religion. and
what the end would be?
These men mean well. They are en-
tirely sincere. But it is sometimes diff
cult to say who do you the most harm,
friends with the best intentions or enc
mics with the worst. And to the present
writer, at least, the sight of capable,
thinking, reading young men and women,
students at our universities, teachers
writer's young lawyers, young doctors.
the future successful men and women OF
the land minds that are to train and
lead the mind of America-the sight of
such alenated from the religion of Christ
by the preacher of Christ's gospel fool
ishly setting himself in opposition to that
which he does not understand is simply
heart-breal1ing. 1t is so common as TO
constitute tragedy in the life of the
church.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1908-11-29
THE MIDDLE-AGED MAN.
Why He Thinks 1t is rheumatism That
Is Bothering Him and Not Gout.

Can anybody tell me-" said the middle
aged man. 1.-The difference between rheu-
matism and govt? Now, not being very
well versed In medical science, knowing
very little, In fact, about osteology or
therapeutics or anatomy, materia medica
or pharmacopea, l wouldn't undertake
myself offhand to say; but in general
way I would say that govt is an all
ment that attacks the rich and rheuma-
tism the poor; and. being not what you
would call rich man, I suppose what
I've got is rheumatism.
1T have read in novels and seen pictures
of portly gentlemen of middle age or
rather more who sat in great easy chairs
and with one foot all swathed up in
bandages stretched out in front of them
supported on a foot-rest. This is the old
gentleman, living in a fine old manor
house or in a splendid mansion in town,
who is described in the novel as being
testy and choleric-choleric, as 1 under
stand it, meaning not that he has chol-
era or anything of that sort, but an un-
even temper; and this old gentleman
with foot thus done up in bandages and
supported on a foot-rest has govt.
But several of my symptoms are diff
ferent l don't live in an old manor
house, nor in a mansion in town: and,
however disposed , might be to be testy
and choeric, l have to keep my temper,
and I don't swathe my foot In bandages
and recline 1t on a foot-rest. 1 have to
keep more or less on the move.
80 I suppose that in the absence of
the familiar govt symptoms, we might
safely diagnose my case as one of just
plain rheumatism; but I guess my rheu-
matism hurts me about as much the govt
of our testy and choleric old friend hurts
him.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1908-11-29

Beginning with the first Sunday of the
new year, the Birmingham Age-Herald
will publish some striking revelations of
the mighty changes which are now talk
ing place in the far east. Since Russia's
defeat by Japan the other side of the
globe has been the worlds chief news
center All Asia is now in a turmoil of I'M
rest, and the air is full of rumors of
war.
Alive to what the Japanese have done,
the 4oo, 100000 Chinese are crying out for
q constitutional government. They are
establishing schools, opening factories
and organizing armies. They are wiping
out the opium evil, tearing the bandages
from their daughters feet and introduce
ing the elements Of our civilization. The
Empress Dowager was in line with this
nese officials are aiding 1t. Indeed
new China has sprung into existence
within the past two years, and the yell
low Giant is slowly but surely girding his
loins for fight with the west
This revolution is now extending
throughout the remainder of Asia. Little
Siam has already put on the seven league
boots of modern progress. Malaysia and
Burmah are building railroads, and the
100000 of East Indians are discussing
the breaking away from England.
A little farther west the Persians are
making the land Of the Shah hotbed Of
rebellion, and the Mohammedans of Tur-
key, In their strife toward a democracy,
are ON the verge of holy war.
At the same time the Japanese are ad-
vancing as never before. They are in
creasing their army and navy, are build
ing foundries and factories and by their
big merchant marine are fast making the
Pacific a Japanese ocean. Within the