davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
SICK MAN WANTED GRANGE.
More Than Willing to Make Transfer
with Physician.

A Syracuse business man vho. Do
sides being extremely active lni an
bilious. has much sense of hanlo9.
was taken sick with slight attack OF
pneumonia His physician. Nv mt
II would be a task 10 keep his HIGH
strung patient in bed, sought - I'M
press on him the seriousness Of me
ailment and the necessity Of absolute
rest: all of which the sick man Is
tened TO in a bored manner Never
theless he consented to obey The dOc-
tor
But this enforced inactivity rIaktef
in him; and each succeeding day
found the patient importuning he
medical man attendant 20 allow Hih
to get out to business. Then, DIS.
gusted, he would lie back 10 aast i'm
precautions at the inexorabla phfsl5
clan
One morning the physician. after
having been up all night on an I'M
portant ease, appeared at his patients
house at the usual hour He had hard
ly stuck his haggard face inside the
door. however, before the man In the
bed gave him quick glance and sat
up.
"Eh? calculated the patient Then
showing out his hand to grasp the doc
tors satehel, he added: Doc. | guess
you'd better get into bed here and
let me go out with the medicine
bag"
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
The Price of Cotton.

Even though weather conditions con-
tinue favorable to the cotton crop
during the balance of the season. and
even though bumper yield is assured.
there is no certainty that actual
cotton will be available in any consid-
cradle quantities at Sc or less within
the next four months. Planters did
not secure as much for last year s
crop as they hoped. yet the majority
are well satisfied with their profits. in
other words they regard the seasons
campaign for higher prices as having
been successful; anything above Zoe
for cotton spells success in the eyes
for most growers The Farmers Tn
ion with its membership of more than
one million has been steadily inereas-
ing its warehouses for storing the
crop, and has improved and expanded
its plan for financing the seasons
yield in proportionate manner What
ever may have been the actual measure
of success of last years holding move
ment. it is generally admitted that it
was eminently successful in prevent
ing the flooding of the market with
cotton at low prices early in the sea-
son. Because of greater experience
and capacity 1t may be expected to
prove much more successful during
the next four to six months than it
was during the same period last sea-
son. The manufacturer or spinner
who contracts TO deliver yarn or goods
during the next six months at prices
on a basis of Sc cotton is accepting a
mighty big risk Buyers of yarns
and goods who are not now eager to
purchase on such a basis will do well
to make a careful study of the future
mentioned=Textile Manufacturers
Journal
The above VIII prove interesting
reading, coming as it does from a we'll
known trade journal published in the
interest of manufacturers of cotton and
wooden fabrics. The editor of the Jour
nal it will be seen, is not expecting
cotton to reach a very low level unless
farmers become demoralized and throw
their cotton on the market as SODA as
gathered and ginned Now that farm
ers are learning the lesson that it is
best to market their cotton slowly and
as needed by the manufacturer. there
is little likelihood that cotton will ever
again reach the &c and &c mark The
manufacturer would rather buy his cot
for, from N
needs it the year round-than from
the speculator. If farmers will hold
part of their cotton and sell it as
needed it stands to reason that one
year with another a better price can
be secured than if marketed as soon
as gathered.-Texas Stoekman and
Farmer.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
CONSIDERATION.
Congratulations Wanted.

} On entering his club one evening
not long ago young Philadelphia
was aeeosted by a friend. who ex
claimed:
why, Charley. you are positively
beaming, What's up?"
I'm in the greatest luck imagin-
able. responded the other You
know, I've been hanging about pretty
fonkers girl for almost year Dur
Ing all this time she would never ad
NIT that she loved ne; she would only
say that she respected ne But now
old chap, congratulate me. for last
night she confessed that she respected
me no ioager--that she loved mel
ILippincotts.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Farmers Educational
AND
COOPERATIVE Union
OF America
Ills a pinky Little World.

A cashier in a downtown bank.
With knack for manipulation,
Began TO manipulate the funds,
Hence his chase through al crea-
ton:
They caught him going up the Nile
On a most palatiai steamer
And they brought him back to old [. S.
On a serious misdemeanor.
His pride was wilted. likewise his pile;
He'd not much left but gall,
And he thought thought, thought.
AS they brought him back.
'Tis a dlnly little world, after all!
man with a wife and family Of kids.
Found his 'fnity in another.
He left them all and went with her
To this place and the other;
They settled down in Mexico,
In cot of white adobe.
And he fondly thought that in old
L. S.
He had left his domestic load;
A tourist. idly rambling about,
Espied them in their kraal,
And he thought. thought, thought,
As they brought him back.
It's a dinky little world. after all.
There's several parties in the swim
That'll catch ii on the hip;
There's going to be some tumbles
From the Presidential ship.
The Denis and Refs and Soc's and
Probs
Have greatest expectations.
And soon there'll be a looking up
OF various regulations;
The losing ones in old L. S.
When recovered from their fall.
VIII think, think. think,
As their minds come back.
'Tis a dinky little world, after all
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
NOT A MIRACLE.
Just Plain Cause and Effect.

There are some quite remarkable
things happening every day, which
seem almost miraculous.
Some persons would not believe that
a man could suffer from coffee drink
ing so severely as 10 cause spells of
Inconsistencies and 10 find eomnlete
relief in changing from coffee TO Pos
tum is well worth recording.
4 used to be a great coffee driai.c-
so much so that it was killing me by
inches. Ny heart became so weak l
would fail and lie unconscious for an
hour at a time. The spells caught
me sometimes tive or three times a
day.
MY friends. and even the doctor.
told me ii was drinking coffee that
Caused the trouble. I would not be-
heye it. and still drank coffee until
could not leave my room.
Then my doctor. who drinks Pos
tum himself. persuaded me TO stop cot
fee and try Postum. After much hest
tation concluded to try il. That was
eight months ago. Since then l have
had but few of those spells. none for
more than four months.
Il feel better. sleep better and am
better every way. I now drink moth
ing but Postum and touch no coffee.
and as I am seventy years Of age all
my friends think the improvement
quite remarkable
There's a Reason"
Name given by Postum Co, Battle
Greek. Mich. Read The Road to Well
vile" in pkgs.
Ever read the above letter? A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true. and full Of human
Interest.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Crack or Break,

Edwin and his mother went for
walk Sunday afternoon. Coming to .
tree of cherries, the mother bent low
limb so that the little fellow could
pick some. Seeing some fine ones
higher up. he begged to be allowed to
climb the tree "Oh, no" said his
mother, that would be breaking the
Sabbath"
And we are only cracking the Sab
bath now. are we, mamma inquired
Edwin.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Humero Worded Rebuke.

Theodore p Roberts had a fluent
command of language. both in speak
ing and writing. and was well liked
by everybody He could secure the
attention Of a negligent publisher II
need be. To one such. who was re
miss about sending vouchers, he once
closed up a long letter with the sen.
tence: And. finally. my dear sir.
permit me 10 say that It would be
easier for a camel to ride into the
kingdom Of heaven on veloeipeGe
than for anyone to find late copy of
your paper in the city of New York "
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Deafness Cannot Be Cured

BY local applications. they cannot reach the liz
eased portion OF the ear There IS only way TO
cure deafness and that by constitutional remedies
Deafness is caused by an inhamed condition oil the
mucous lining OF the Eustachian Tube. When this
tube is inhamed you have rumbiing sound or m
perfect hearing and when il Is entirely closed Deaf
ness is the result and unless the Inflammation can be
taken out and this tube restored TO its normal eond-
ton hearing will be destroyed forever. nine cases
out OF ten are caused by Catarrh. which Is nothing
but an innamed condition OF the mucous surfaces
We will give One Hundred Dollars for any case Of
Deafness tcaused by catarrh) That cannot be cured
by Hairs Catarrh Cure. send for circulars. free
r J. CHENEY 4 co. Toledo. D.
Sold by Druggists, sc.
Take Hairs Family Pills for constipation
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
WANTED 1T OVER WITH.
Game Younsster Preferred Drastic
Action in Punishment.

Youngsters are pretty philosoph.
ieal.9 observed Wallace Knight and
then he went ahead to set forth the
point of view of small daughter at
his house.
The child was sent to bed early
the other evening as punishment for
some act contrary TO rules and regula-
tons
After she had been tucked in bed
for some time and was supposedly
asleep. the youngster called her IA
Their ard told him she wished he would
GO ahead and spank her and have It
over with. instead of sending her of
to bed that way This lying in bed
never's going to make me any better. q"
she said, and a good spanking would.
Besides 1t makes me GO mad | can't
sleep and so what's the use of ?"--
Cleveland Plain Dealer
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Makers of artificial flowers in New
York city are receiving an unusual
number of orders from all parts OF
the country for the fall and winter
trade. Most of the supply for the ma
lion comes from New York. where
more money is spent for the manu-.
faeture of imitation flowers than In
any other city IN the world.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Willing to Help Him.

He had gone to the dry goods store
with a bit of dress material which his
wife had hidden him to match. 81
am very sorry. sir said the salesman.
hut have nothing exactly like this.
The very last remnant was sold this
morning"
But | must have it," exclaimed the
husband. Otherwise, how can | face
my wife,"
IF you will permit me-. sir said
the salesman, 4 would venture to sug-
gest that you invite a friend home 10
dinner with you
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Poor. Patient Man,

Mr.. Henpeck-My dear, please don't
call me Leo any more.
Mrs. Henpeck-What foolishness are
you thinking about now? Why
shouldn't / call you Leo" That's
yoCr name.
Mr.. Henpeck-I know, but it makes
my friends laugh when you call me
that; l was thinking you might call
NE Job" Just for pet name.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

One of the ugliest acts of journalistic
i'll manners was the act of the news.
papers in prying in and claiming &c
have found out the minimum price
for cotton set by the Farmers Union,
and publishing that price to the world
IN unseemly haste after telling the
world that the farmers We're trying &c
keep 1t secret. We guess the farmers
viii stand for it. though. They have
reputation for licking the hand that
smites them-Abilene Farmers Jour.
nal.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
1. VIII STAY There

IN ms family medicine chest no
remedy is permitted to remain unless
il proves beyond doubt the best to
be obtained for its particular purpose.
For treating all manner OF skin trou-
HES such as Eczema, letter, Ring
worm. etc. Hunts Cure has held its
mace for many years. ! have failed
10 find surer remedy. K cures itch
ing instantly
r. NJ. SWAMI, Franklin. La.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Scatter the feed for the chickens un-
der the plum trees if you have such.
In their feeding they will then gather
up many insect pests which work up
on the fruit and trees, Digging about
the trees will also cause them to hunt
for worms about the roots. Shaking
the tree at feeding time will dislodge
many an insect and diseased plum
which the hens will destroy
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

When you take the hen and chicks
from the nest grease the hen lightly
under the wings and along the breast
with little fresh lard (no salD This
will assist in getting rid OF any mites
or lice en- the little ones. Use no
grease about the nests before they are
aatched.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Kidney pills, kid
ney dis g a 5 e W a S
slowly poisoning me.
Dizzy spells almost
made me fall. sharp
pains like knit e
thrusts would catch
me in the back, and
finally an attack of
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Have strictly Farmers Union pic
mics. Let all net proceeds of stands,
cts, go TO the Union treasury TO help
pay speakers and other necessary ex-
penses. BY so doing the outsiders will
help keep the Union going and they
should hep some II the members Of
the Union are benefited by the organi-
cation. everybody else, except the
CRATER is likewise benefited Be up
and doing. the fields are ripe unto
harvest Union Advocate. (OklaO
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Fairy Tale.

On the third finger of her left hand
the sweet young thing wore a magniti-
cent solitaire
so you're going TO marry prince.
are your said the necessary ques-
TONER
"A prince? I don't understand.
The son of a coal king
"Oh, yes" smiled the sweet young
ching. I'm TO be his Cinder Ella :"
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
jap immigrants for Brazil.

Brazil has received its first batch OF
Japanese Observation-Disclosures the
Arrangement concluded about nine
months ago between the japanese and
Brazilian governments Within two
DAYS all were at work on the coffee
plantations. Other shiploads will ar
rive regularly.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Work Of zamhesi Missions.

A pamphlet recently issued by An
drew Murray gives a brief survey OF
missions south of the Zambesi. There
are 81 different missionary organiza-
tions at work. ministering to over TO-
600, 600 people. The student volunteer
movement in South Africa has put 81
young missionaries in the field since
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

grip left me with a constant agoniz-
ing backache. Doan's Kidney Pills
helped me quickly and in three weeks
time there was not a symptom of
kidney trouble remaining"
Sold by all dealers. so cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo. n. Y.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Don't X Jar You ?

To have cough that you can't leave
off-even when you go to bed? Put
it away for good by using Simmons
Cough Syrup II heals Inflammation
of the throat and lungs-giyes you rest
and peaceful sleep.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

There is more actual misery and
less real danger in case of itching,
skin disease than any. other ailment.
Hunts Cure is manufactured espe-
cially for these cases. 1t relieves in
stantly and cures promptly. Abso-
lutely guaranteed
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
FLY YOUTH.

The Boss-Where did you work
last?
Boy-On a fly paper.
The Boss-A fly paperi What's a fly
paper?
Boy-Wot, Don't you read the Daily
Balloon?
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

A trap nest will pick out the poor
and the good layers. giving chance
10 dispose OF the drones and thus keep
the workers Have you ever stopped
to consider the matter?
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Ethics Of Friendship.

In the progress of each mans char
acter, he will have learned the lesson
of life who is skillful in the ethics Of
iendship.-Emerson.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

When the hens have plenty of sour
milk 10 drink every day they do not
need much ground feed. Nothing
makes eggs faster, nor more of them,
than sour milk
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
The Same Thine.

I'll bet your trouble isn't anything
like mine. I've got sick family
Isn't it? I've got fac simile."-
Boston American.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Cultivate Decision Of Character.

Every man who has decision OF
character will have enemies and the
man who has no decision OF character
can have no friends Butler
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

breachy COW. sheep-killing dog
and lazy and careless hired man are
the three greatest nuisances on the
farm.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

When you go out on hard road
don't take wagon that is just ready
To tuIa be TO pieces. Hitch on to some
thing that will stand grief.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Hicks capudine Cures Nervousness,

Whether tired out worried. sleepless or
what not. Ii quiets and Fefreshes brain
and nerves. It's liquid and pleasant TO
take. Trial bottle l0e-reg1iar size 35e and
soc at druggists.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Grow is not good eating. but the
man who keeps his mouth shut never
has TO eat il.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Our happiness Is sacred deposit
for which we must render account to
others-Colton
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Shoulder Your Own Mistakes.
You will never prof. by your mis-
takes so long as you blame others for
tthem-Paseal
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Home to the boy and girl does
not mean simply place in which to
eat. sleep and work.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

The man who is always retailing
scandal must be some sort of a rela-
ton TO the tumblebug.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
THREE WEEKS.
sroush. About Remarkable Change.

Mrs. A. J. Davis of Murray, KY.
says: When | began using Doans
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

\ man isn't necessarily fisherman
Just because he is liar
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

It is all right to have an aim in life
provided We don't aim too long with
out shoC5s::----
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

II takes hard work to grow corn
and character.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
important to Mothers.
They Did.

Uncle Henry-Nellie. hope they
observe the Sabbath at that lake re-
Sort where you spent your vacation.
Pretty Niece-Indeed they do, uncle
On Sundays they always serve regu-
lar four course dinner.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

The dread of ridicule is apt to stran.
gle originality at its birth.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
TO DRIVE OUT MALARIA
AND I'll LID LIP THE SYSTEM.

Take the Old Standard GROVES TAsTELEsS
CHILL TONIC. You know " hat you are taking.
fhe formula is plainly printed on every bottle.
showing lis simply Quinne and Iron in tasteess
form. and the most enectual form. For grown
yeople and children. Soc.
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22

Aliens Foot-Ease, n Powder
For swollen. sweating feet tfyes slant relief The
orig nal powder for the feet 2oc A. all Druggists
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
The Farmers .Union.
National Cotton Committee

NdIIOndI IOllUn NOmmIlltt.
G. R. Hightower, Sec.
Memphis, Tenn.
The next annual meeting of the
American Association of Farmers In.
stitute Workers will be held in Wash.
ington, d. c., Nov. 1911
The Monticellonian., 1908-10-22
Demand for Artificial Flowers.

r. NJ. SWAMI. Franklin, La.
The Detroit times., 1908-06-15
.SWEOE5 EXPECTED.
TO PUSH U. 5.
BOYS HARD
ENGLAND COMBINES OLYMPIC
WITH THOSE OF WALES
AND RELAND-"ANYTHl TO
BEAT AMERICA" THE MOTTO.

NEW YORK, June 15.-Todays
news from London has aroused the
apprehension OF American athletic
leaders over the chances of success OF
the American team in London. In
Europe II Is anything TO beat Amer
lea, and those who are well informed
believe America has a stupendous
task before her. England Is working
as she never worked before To get to-
gethef a winning team. The teams
Of Ireland. Wales. Scotland and Eng
land will be combined In one for tho
sole purpose OF giving Uncle Sam
walloping. England counts on France.
Germany, Sweden and ether countries
10 supply the men who will deprive
America OF many points, Sweden In
particular will furnish lot OF trou-
BILE TO both America and England
The Swedish athletes have arrived
In London l56 strong and among them
Il a man who can high jump six feet
"a inches. There are three Swedes
who have covered five miles under %
minutes and II seconds one Swede.
Lindeberg by name. has covered 100
metres In competition In the great
time of 10 So seconds. one.tifth OF
ord and one-fifth faster than was run
at the American Olympic try-outs In
Philadelphia recently
Accidents put several OF the star
performers out OF commission at
Athens. and the secondary men, such
as Pilgrim. astonished everybody by
going out and making good clean
cut victory for this country.
Al least $4,000 more must be raised
To send dozen men now on the sup
| elemental list To London. Realizing
the Importance of having these men
on the team. three famous athletes.
Martin Sheridan. Harry Hillman and
Lawson Robertson. have started out
+ te- raise-the- s555etse necessary ft,r=tifis
purpose They will have To hustle
hard 10 have that amount in the
hands OF Julian w Curtin, OF the
American committee, before June 20
The Detroit times., 1908-06-15

Chatham river not only without mis-
hap, but reported that the entire boat
was thoroughly dry. This condition
was not wholly due TO the seaworthi-
ness OF the Key West, but also TO the
able seamanship OF Mr. Still.
The welcome at the docks Of
Chatham was noisy and demonstra-
tive, and quite took the motor boaters
aback by its unexpectedness.
The rain that night spoiled the auto
mobile ride around the town, but this
part or the program was carried for
ward Sunday morning Saturday
night there were speeches, music and
refreshments at the armory. and the
citizens OF Chatham wed with each
other 10 make the visitors feel az
home
Commodore kotcher set the time for
the return home at | p. III. AT that
time weather conditions were becom-
ing exceedingly stormy. and none of
the small boats attempted the return
trip. most OF them coming back today
Commodore Kotcher with the william
ma. Fice-Commodore Scripps with the
Little Lady. and Mr.. VIM. Reei-Hil
with the Ono. beat across the lake in
q driving storm 10 the Rushmere
club. where dinner was served, and
the return trip made 10 Detroit ar.
irving home about O'Clock Two
ladies' made the round trip on the
Wilanna as Commodore Kotcher's
guests-Mrs. +. r. Still and Miss A.
Allen.
The Detroit times., 1908-06-15

The total attendance was about IFS
people
Overhead the weather was all that
could be desired, but the rough water
was too much for few of'the smaller
boats, and about ten OF them grad
ually gave up and turned back short
" after getting out into the lake.
The remainder OF the boats made a
stirring picture OF color, strung out
in almost single file for more than a
mile, and headed by the flagship
"Wilanna. Every craft was gay with
bunting, the Canadian flag flying on
the fore flagstaff alone, with the Amer
lean ensign astern
Some OF the smaller open boats de-
serve praise for attempting and con-
tinuing this trip under existing con-
ditions. and special mention is due the
Key West" with Rear Commodore
Fred r. Still at the helm. The grace
full Key West is too well known about
the waters OF Detroit TO need any de-
scription: IL is distinctly a speed boat
and yet Mr.. Still arrived at the
The Detroit times., 1908-06-15
CMALL CPORTING

George sIier q. dead.
Monroe, 81 E,eret,s of Detroit, :.
yanderbIit's Northeast won the Grand
PFix.a at Paris
They continue 20 pinch the poor
booktes at Grdvesend.
Good Luchs. AT Muskegon, o. Czen-
kuseh pitched COR the petroitets
Fair Play won the BrookIyn derby. the
feature event al Gravesend Saturday.
The Burroughs team stiil leads the
Manufacturers league with an undc-
f,atcd record.
srgisaw IL now threatening. Lansins's
southern Michigan lead The race -
also tiFhteni.g up al, round
Fourth wa. the best Centrai High
could get at The Chicago ,intors,ch .,i,
first in The low hurdles
Thirty power boats took part In the
Detroit Motor clubs run 10 chatham
or saturday Some rough weather
was encountered IN route.
There T. some talk Of " summer ncet-
Ing ~ Windsor 10 take over the dates
OF Keniiworth track Buffalo. put Out
OF commission by the new facing law
Tommy purns let poor Bo.h,cr squire
Paris SATURDAY, night. and thCn
copied him with solar pleNus blow.
EntrIes for Defroit,s A. A. ~ meet. 10
be hcld June %. close JuUe-22T With
the physical director % the V VI =.
A with whom all entry nominations
must be mad.
The Malice examiners I'm New York city