davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
ILLEGAL LAWS

A CCORDING to a decision by Judge
"a Smith, the factories ordinance
IA passed by the city council is un-
constitutional and void. This decision
offers such an exact and timely prece-
dent to the case of citizens who are dis
putting the constltutionallty of another
ordinance that it will be surprising If 1t
does not dampen the ardor of those who
are upholding the validity of local
ordinance merely because it is in ex-
istence, on the principle, apparently,
that whatever is, is right. The city
law gave the fire commissioners power
over industrial sites. The superior
court judge says that the city law is
worthless because the city cannot make
q law that is contrary to constitution
ally established conditions Surely it
will not be taken amiss if we advise
our local legislators to make haste
slowly and to be sure they are right
before committing Los Angeles to alb
surdities or injustices. The position
taken by the court was that the board
Of fire commissioners hasrpo power
over Industrial sites ct is certainly
contrary to the fhnqaFnentaI principles
of our governmentseand the citizens
thereof as guaranteed by yStffe federal
constitution andseouE oNneconstitution
for a citizen tokdependstlpQn the viii
of any man r4set Of men or officers
for his right toselIbarltlih lSwful and
useful businesS.% IL y AR very well to
be Jealous in Nas5iiS. S.sing,f but zeal
should be temperedsbg iseretion, and
the discreet legislator wa Mot commit
himself to an ordinafiA TIN in it's very
nature is itself illegA. q IAN illegal law
is a good paradox bst sbad business"
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
LARRY FORGETS HOW TO STOP MOTORCYCLE;
BURNS THE WIND FOR NINETY LONG MILES

ply power for ninety-mile ride; tho
bearings were well oiled and Larry
had no doubt OF his ability to control
his motor bike.
He soon approached his house and
his wife stood at the front gate gazing
in admiration at the figure of her lord
driving up the street. This greatly
delighted Larry. but after passing the
house he decided to turn around and
go back. He made the turn all right,
but when he tried to stop in front
of the house he found he had forgotten
how to turn the power off.
Around the block he went vainly
pulling everything in sight and jump
ing on everything else. Nothing doing.
The bike kept going. Around the
block goes Larry for the second time,
then for the third and fourth, but
all the time the wagon would not
stop. For ninety long and weary miles
went Larry, until at last the motor
cycle gave up in sheer disgust, came
to stop and Larry tumbled off, to
the surprise and qualification of his
wife and his own thanks.
Larry sold the machine the next day
for $39.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

in his mind.
There is one way in which he can
still retain his hold on the old lire,
and that is by keeping acquainted with
lots of young women, and rev there
are who can withstand Hugh's pretty
smiles. Now, Hugh is married, ana II
there is one thing above another his
attractive wife objects to, 1t is Hugh's
propensity to carry on his innocent
flirtations.
She continually puts 1t up to her
husband in peculiar ways, and he is
compelled to keep his eyes open in
order to retain his position in the
lead.
Some time ago Hugh was working
on an afternoon paper. At O'Clock
his time was up and he was then at
liberty to wander where he pleased,
and frequently he chose strange and
wondrous paths.
One day a letter was handed him.
The envelope was addressed in a neat
and pretty hand, and from the paper
arose a delicate perfume, While the
stamp was daintily pasted on corner
wise.
When he opened it Hugh was sur
nrised at, the contents. The letter read:
aDear Mr.. Allen---I have long wanted
to become acquainted with you. You
know you walk by my house each
morning, and / have become accus-
toned to arising early and watching
for your form. j suppose you VIII be
surprised to receive this letter, but l
cannot resist the temptation to write
YOU. and if you viii decide whether
Won care to meet me, / am sure you
will be pleased. That is, am sure /
win be pleased-to meet you, you
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
HUGH ALIENS RARE PRESENCE OF MIND
SAVES HIM FROM UNPLEASANT HOUR

know. l will be by the big cannon in
Central park promptly at $3.50 o'clock
Thursday afternoon, and IL you are
there I will greet you. Goodby, and
l hope to see you"
The letter was not signed, but
through Hugh's heart passed a thrill.
His vanity was touched, and Hugh
has lots of vanity.
Thursday morning came. ~and with
1t HuSh.- A new blue suit covered his
person, and his clean shaven face and
sparkling eyes showed he was ready
to "cover his assignment"
Promptly at 1925 he hurried from his
office and started for Central park
He did not return that day, and the
following morning he refused to dis
cuss the matter.
Some time later the story leaked
out. Poor Hugh! He had gone to the
park with great hopes,A but as he
neared the corner of Fifth and Hill
streets something attracted his atten-
ton. That thing was a woman's dress
some distance ahead of him, and after
watching 1t carefully for a few mo-
ments Hugh decided he was we'll ac-
Quainted with the owner-in fact, very
we'll acquainted. Truth to tell, 1t was
his wife. and the sum of the whole
deep laid plot dawned on him. His
wife had some woman write the let
ter to see If he would appear and try
to carry on Irritation. Hugh fed.
Then he decided to repay the trick
with one of his own.
fastening to his home, Hugh had
barely reached the front door when
the telephone bell rang
Hello, is that you, Hugh?" asked
his wife's voice, and yes. Where are
you, dearie?" was the answer Hugh
sent back over the wire. why aren't
you at home this afternoon?" con-
tinued the husband. II am so sorry
you are away, as ! am not feeling
well and want you with me. Come
home, now, won't you?"
Mrs. Allen hastened to obey, and
was thunderstruck when her welded
lord sprung the letter he had received
on her with the remark. "Look whal
some foolish woman has sent me-" and
she was exceptionally kind to Hugh
the remainder of the day.
Perhaps this is telling tales out OF
school, but at any rate 1t is telling
on both
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
NEED SOUND ORDINANCE
MI E trust that the mayors veto OF
w the anti-race tip ordinance viii
not end the atten1nts of the

N E trust that the mayors veto OF
w the anti-race tip ordinance Will
not end the attempts of the
council to carry out the wishes of many
well disposed citizens with regard to
the abatement of the tipster nuisance.
That the council should have supplied
Il reasonable excuse for the mayors
action must not deter its members from
doing their duty by the public, and
providing an adequate ordinance which
viii not be vulnerable. Such an ordi-
nance is not impossible, and even an
imperfect ordinance is better than none
at all. When the mayor vetoed the
anti-race tip law surely he did not
intend to veto attempts to restrain the
activities of the professional tipsters,
who most undoubtedly are practically
the agents of the race tracks. Legis-
lation that viii make it impossible for
tipsters and "dope-sheet" makers and
sellers to conduct business in Los
Angeles can be devised and should be
devised immediately. The "dope-sheets"
are ridiculous. and gull none but the
simple. Atsthe same time society must
protect its weaker members against the
operations of the predatory class, and
that is the class represented by those
responsible for tip sheets, pointers"
advice to bettors, latest reports of form
and record, etc.
There is no reason why the pirates
should not be driven out Of Los Angeles.
1t would not require a great amount of
ingenuity to frame a measure which
would forbid unscrupulous takers from
conducting operations on the streets of
this city, while 1t would not interfere
with the legitimate news columns of the
daily papers. A wise, discreet, judi
clous law restraining the operations of
unscrupulous tipsters who live by their
wits and by taking advantage of the
sullibihty OF their simpler fellow citi-
zens should be enacted and signed.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
MENACE TO FREE PRESS

HNDETERRED by the political acct
dents that have happened to
~ indiscreet politicians who in times
past have endeavored to interfere with
the liberty of the press, Senator Pen
rose introduced a bill to provide for an
absolute press censorship in the hands
of the postmaster general. The bill
provides that any issue of any period
ical may be declared non-mailable by
the postoffice department and that
thereafter that periodical may be ex-
cluded from second-class privileges, at
the discretion of the postmaster gen.
eral The section of the revised stat
utes amended by the bill relates to the
class Of matter that is generally entitled
unfit for publication" but that always
has been published and apparently
always will be published. In the mil
lennium we will have no demoralizing
literature, but until then we can only
attack this kind of reading by Great
ing a public taste for better reading
and by putting obstacles in the way of
the general circulation of undesirable
literature. But to punish the good with
the bad will not amend matters until
two blacks make a white. 1t is absurd
that the decent press of the country
should be hampered, restricted, pen
allied or fettered in any way because
of the immoral part of the press. Leg
islation that Furnishes community in
order to restrain the depravity Of few
of it's members shows little common
sense and small knowledge of human
nature Will the pupil ever forget or
forgive the injudicious school master
who day after day keeps in" class
and Furnishes every member Of it
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
ORDINANCE IS GOOD

LII proposals made by the city
"a council or to the city council to
interfere with ordinances es-
tablished for the sake of public COM
fort should be discouraged. Constant
interference with conditions is a bad
policy. The ordinance with regard to
delivering oil, for instance, is good
enough as it stands. Why not let we'll
enough alone? People interested in oil
wish to have the ordinance changed
so that they can deliver until IL a. m.
The ordinance is all right as it stands
If the council should keep fiddling at it,
making this, that and the other change
to suit various interests, it will soon
be reduced to state of inefficiency
When an ordinance is good and meets
with popular approval, why meddle
with it?
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

the city editor and informed that it
was up to him to attend the dance
of the boot and shoe makers union to
be given at Daly's hall.
Off started Mack, but when he
reached the hall he was quietly held
up by the doorkeeper who demanded
to see his badge. Now all reporters
do not wear badges, but despite all
Mack's efforts he could not convince
the doortender of this fact, and at
last he gave up in disgust.
When Mack returned to the office
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

The benefit performance for the
Working Boys home, at the Auditorium
Friday night, March 13, will be given
for the purpose Of raising money for
the purchase of linen, beds, the equip
ment of bathroom and for additions
7 eeded to make the home suitable for
the large number of boys who are being
helped at this institution and benefited
by it. An excellent program has been
prepared Indeed. the program and the
object of the entertainment are equally
meritorious and attractive.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

"Bill" Murray.
Say, chief" said the stranger, stick
ing out a long honey hand, 81 am an
officer of the law myself, and I'm up
here after man. Guess 1 can find him
all right, but II / want any men I sup
pose you kin let me have coupler"
AS he spoke he ran his hands
through his hair and shifted his SOM
brero onto the back of his head and
tried to look wild.
Eyes, l guess 1 can let you have
some men," said Murray. Where do
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Mr.. Taft says that in the orient it is
necessary to fill the measure of the eye
in order to be convincing. This ex-
plains the visit of the American fleet
to the Pacific. The orientals will not
believe us when we say that we have
in commission a mighty navy, prepared
for action and ready for any emer-
gency. Seeing's believing.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

chased for himself one high power
motorcycle. for which he separated
himself from $3.50.
After buying the machine Larry tele-
phoned his wife to stand at the front
gate and watch real police reporter
go by He then instructed the dealer
to load the machine with all the gaso-
line it would stand, turned on the
power, mounted and rode away.
1t was all fine for Larry. The ma
chine carried enough gasoline to sup
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

was a tall. gaunt
specimen, and as
he entered the
station he glanced
to the right and
left with a cau-
tious look which
might have sent
chills In t o the
heart of any law
breaker.
"I'm looking for
the patrolman In
charge-the chief.
I guess, will do
he said to the jan
itor, a n d w q 5
fort l,xrtth z1,axro5
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

AK about circus
men, soldiers and
baseball players
having pets-why.
they are not in it
with the trainers
of race tracks.
Mickey Dillon,
now up in Oak
land, formerly
owned a little
porker, that was
known and talked
Of wherever race
track followers
congregate.
Mickey thought
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

ACK was a young
reporter on an
eaStern paper.
Mack had ideas
of his own about
newspaper work
and the respect
men in that pro-
fession should car
ry In the eyes of
the world, and he
objected strenu-
ously when he
was not treated
fright" when out
on assignments.
One night Mack
xx-o- nnlln1 an hxr
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Z IS wrong to tell
tales out of
school, but one Is
being told of Hugh
Allen it would be
a shame not to
repeat.
Since going into
newspaper work
Hugh has fire.
quently regretted
the old days--the
good days-the
days when he was
on the stage, and
the longing to re-
turn to them has
often been strong
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Cheer, boys, cheer! Twelve six-inch
guns, the first consignment for the
fortifications at Manila that are to
head off Japan and, if 1t comes tot, all
the rest of the world, were shipped to
the Philippines yesterday-IN A BRIT
ISH VESSEL-Hey!--Wh are you
laughing about? You are no patriot.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
ILL TAYLOR has

ILL TAYLOR has
a good story he
is telling on Larry
Eicholz. When the
present political
manager" (what's
a political man.
ager?) was q day
police reporter on
a morning jour-
nal, he decided he
was going to
teach the other
boys around town
the proper method
of "doin' police"
With this end in
view larry MR.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

The astronomer at Columbia univer-
sity says that there is not any water
vapor on Mars. Professor Percival
Lowell says that there is water vapor
on Mars There is not any way or
settling this dispute unless President
Roosevelt should appoint committee
of American scientists to visit Mars
and report.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

A New York man who has spent
seventy-two years in making models
for inventors to send to the patent
office says that there are sixty-seven
men in New York whom he knows OF
who are working on perpetual motion
machines. Are they at Matteawan?
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Bishop Conaty says financial condi-
tions in the east are improving. NO
matter how much financially improved
the cast may be, it will never rival
California until it can improve great
many other features. including its
climate.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
Iqorrote's Puzzle Free

To introduce. we win give away ten thousand
Of these Igorrote's double cross puzzles. made
of Philippine mahogany. Difficult and fasci-
mating. Write quick and enclose cents In
stamps to cover cost Of mailing puzzle. that's
all. Address Dominocards Co., 1907 Chouteau
avenue, st. Louis, Mo.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

High protective tariff doctrines are
making headway in Great Britain. oh,
WE'LL it won't be the first time that poor
old John Bull has had to wear Uncle
Sans cast-off clothes,
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

The Sons Of ST. David in Los Angeles
are teaching their children to write
love letters in Welsh. They will be
saccharine love letters-plenty of Taffy
IN them.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

more of that little pig than of any
one of the dilapidated "also rams" he
night he used to give the little porker,
Lard" as he called him, bath and
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

European allies frequently find their
promises are all lies.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01
The vernal exquinox will come.
And the Irish will parade;
The booming bullfrog will resume
His music in the glade.

The booming bullfrog will resume
His music In the glade.
And then the gentle spring will come
and the poet will essay, with swelling
breast and bliss his bum and muse
attended lay; the rooster will announce
the dawn, and the hen will scratch the
dirt, and everybody will put on thin
ner undershirt. The sassafras will
brew again to tone the system rank,
and the washout will upset the train
and throw it down the bank; the gan
der and the goose will molt, the
meadow will be wet, and the spring.
intoxicated colt will turn a summer
set. The house will be cleaned up
again, the robins come in drove, and
the husband will eat bread and cheese
behind the kitchen stove. The young
mans heart will beat for love, and the
widow in her weeds will find man
and seize him where Estella wore the
beads.
And then sweet April Will return,
And John D. get in line
And pay his months installment on
That thirty million fine.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Persons born under Aries always
think before speaking, and they never
say anything. They are good organiz-
ers and generally belong to the Anti
saloon league. They make good law
yers and generally get the case con-
tinued until they can elect the prose-
cutting attorney.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-03-01

Persons Lorn under Pisces drink like
a fish and vote wet. They make ex-
cellent subordinates, like Friday and
Loeb They can say no, and 1t is
futile to expose them to any more life
insurance, for they won't take it, They
are very cautious and always take
seats near the fire escape.
The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1908-11-15

eighty-fve wearers of the Fez in the
line of march yesterday, not to men.
tion the twenty-nine luckless ones who
aspire to be on the inside of the Shrine
secrets and who paid yesterday for
their temerity. A feature of the parade
was the presence of an elephant and a
dromedary in the line, which pair
winked solemn eyes and wagged irrel-
evant tails at the crowds.
The victims were ragged out regard,
less of cost and were the recipients of
many an ironical cheer and compliment
tary quip as they walked along the
hard road that led to their testing out
chambers. Billy Campbell and A. Fl.
Jungclaus, adorned in pink tights,
gauze ballet skirts and bodices cut demi
tasse, coquetted with their friends
along the route from the sidesaddles of
couple of skittish ponies, led by two
others of the lowly band. Harry Deni-
son trundled sugar loading machine
according to his own design (patent
applied for) and announced by placard
to the world that he was moving a
warehouse.
Another trundler was R. H. Benz
rose, who was the motive power for
a perambulator, labeled "Isn t it aw-
full. Mabel" He also invited everyone
to g. Ask me about it, 4" He handled the
handles like a professional and never
upset his load once during the trip.
J. F. Childs, manager of 7. H. Davies
grocery department, paid penance for
Continued on Page Twelve.)
The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1908-11-15

In all the pomp and panOply of war,
fluttering pennons, flashing arms, rich
vestments and stunning gowns the
Sheiks of Aloha paraded themselves be
fore admiring thousands yesterday and
made their annual pilgrimage through
the city streets. Preceded by a full
band, interspersed with savage beasts
unknown to any zoology and followed
by a string of bedraggled but by no
means begruntled captives, the process
sion lined its triumphant way through
the lanes of cheering populaee, swept
through the city over the freshly water
ed maeadam, blinked straight into the
face of the sun and looked pleasant
long enough for a score of cameras to
snap and then steered a jaunty course
straight for the torture chamber. Here
the inquisitorial degree was conferred
on the shrinking noviees, the brands
Were doused with the waters of Mir
vana and the great day of the Shrine
was over. All that remains today are
he memories of the vows scared on the
oSnsciousness of the new Shrine mem
oers, the various black, blue and yell
The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1908-11-15
MURDER CHARGE
AGAINST NAKAMURA

Nakamura, the japanese husband OF
Yoshino, the woman who was found
dead in the bathroom of the Sanford
home on Monday evening, was charged
with murder in the first degree Friday
afternoon by Chief Kalakiela. At the
inquest, testimony was produced by
Captain Spillner and his daughter that
Nakamura visited the Sanford home
about s a. m, remaining few minutes,
and then hurrying away. Nakamura,
on the other hand, stated that he was
not in the house or near it during that
day. 1t was this discrepancy in the
testimony that caused the police to
hold Nakamura for investigation.
The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1908-11-15
ShrinerS Parade Amid
Admiring Thousands
: = = = = = y

low spots of tenderness developed in
sundry available places, and one case of
ptomaine poisoning, symptomed by a
great dryness behind the lips and a
low, persistent phenomenon of shoot
ing stars above the eyes.
The Shriners' parade yesterday was
one of the best Honolulu has ever seen.
The familiar emerald small clothes of
Sam johnson twinkled not at the head
of the Arab Patrol, but Captain Harry
Murray shouted the orders most eff
GENTLY and the Arabs wheeled, shunted
and evoluted with their old time pre-
cision. Potentate E. c. Brown, IN
dove colored robe and turban, led his
host on the march, in close company
with him being the other officers of the
Shrine, each arrayed in a glory that
might have envied. Brother
George Filmer. Past Potentate of Islam,
the guest of honor of Aloha, was in the
parade, driving a sextet of venture
some applicants for Shrine honors, each
wearing a gorgeous holoku and hula
skirt.
Including the Arab Patrol there were
The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1908-11-15

Many students are registering for
the afternoon classes of the College
OF Hawaii.
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1908-12-18

Two more new suits have been
filed during the past week for the
next February, 1909, term of cir
cult court at Salisbury as follows
Chariton courier. (Keytesville, Chariton County, Mo.) 1878-current, 1908-12-18
The Proof of the Pudina.

The loss of $4,000 over and
above the insurance on our home
the 18th of last January and the
subsequent heavy expense of re.
building have kept the COURIER
mans nasal organ squarely down
on the financial grindstone this
year, and in order to keep cur
ship afioat we have been com.
pelled to collect more doggedly
than has been our pleasure. But
it was case of necessity and not
of choice.
Notwithstanding our persistent
efforts in that direction we have
large number of subscribers
who have failed to respond to
our entreaties to ''pay up," and
unless they do 80 by mex: Mon.
day, December q, we shall have
to send them another statement
of their account with the request
that they ''please remit If you
treat US with proper consider.
alton no statement will be sent
you.
1t is so much pleasanter for
both of US to get your name on
our roll of honor than it is to send
you a dun. If you are q doubt.
ing Thomas, try it and see. The
proof of the pudding is in chew.
ing the string.