The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-12-27
ODD NEWS THAT LIE TYPES
 SHOWED DURING THE YEAR
The Lights and Shadows of the Passing Year as Shown in the Queer and Droll Happenings
 of the Days and Months.
Br wAawIck JAMES PRICE.

BY wARwIck JAMES PhsSA'
 xv.a .an s,rvev the moving pictures If inc daily news and feel that tpe greater end of the story is toia h n ..grsf-3are dfgplays?' We ind there inc rist of all that Is to. make copy for. tomorrow.s historians-put uns haart-beats of man.. the huhan rsa blood and zeal life, are lnslas, sburieds, 1t may be. in four-line par T arraphs of happenings triding only to a superficial reader. 1t is Tn the s.nsas u.As news" of the weeks. and months. tnas ,s one finds the true indiees or ths oie worlds Joys and sorrows.
 Nineteen eight's passing days nave heen rich in such things. It was net odd. perhaps. that Mrs. Carrie Na.o. should. last, May. have sunersa hss thirty third arrest; she vas eu'ss t', thS Sorority of the Hatchet. It was o1s of. tha usual. however. for c. A Gnh- dalrer of Railway. N. J., to de on snYYy sth fer he was born and married on that same date; and the Key y.e a.lsssS ss Pennsvivaria Lutheraus. increased the oddIty of the situation when ne ge uarfed this life on September Ae--ne' = bavInr owned that day as ami yersary both of his birth and Wea- dins. ..o -,
 
 tbe burning of coal mine at Mlll- yaie. m inc Keystone State2 What ynuss have seemed depiorable waste to ali who only glanced at thai ais- patch led to. vazt moral uplfft TOT the community. For, whie the plauA ands. of snakes were driven surface- ward--they invaded the village streats, roisterers. homeward bound. with un- certain steps, met them--and the an an ticipated followed. Every male Mill. vaiian signed the pledge and climbed upon the water wagon.
 Starters.
 That was in the years tnitial smontn which also witnessed a dust shower at sea; one does not expect just mat Yet, on the 1Ith 2 .pecuiiar white pow der fell thick upon the decks of ths Monterey" just cleared from Pro- gresse, bound for New York.
 January again, heard too-opfim- istic applicant for naturalization (this was In Franklin. Pal state his con viction that God made Congress- Such ignorance was, of course. denied tho mighty right of vote-casting.
 Odder than this. though. was the word which went forth from the Bronx Zoo on the tweixe-month's second day: that "PythaBoras'. had just had his nrst meal in thousand years "Pythy, be it added, Is a toad found buried in limestone rock a little matter of 500 feet under ground in a Butte. Mont, silver mine. Four flies and an earth worm constituted his baDduet--and he swallowed as though his small green The Blind God ,Dan'l, has, of course, been busy turning out '.heart~thrpb' teIegrams. In March, a Chicago court limited Mrs. Ora Leedom to six kisses a day; Mir. L.. absolutely declined to live with the demonstrative lady un- less she could content herself with fhae On the other hand October saw Dennis BuFns of Bridgeport, Conn :, ar- rested for disordexly conduct in tfnl- : ley car near Waterbury. all Because ne insistedson kissing his spouse in way which the other passengers stfgmatised as .'ob1ectIonable and obnoxious 6why bcouidn't Dennis and Ora Nave hitched up) 70 f
 october also told of a: certain n i and Mime. Gonard, who did their best to- rival Mark Twaip's young, couple, who took their honeymoon trips sepa-, rateIy. The Gouards thought to cele- brate their wedding by walking round the world and have actualfy started. But why so far?--it sounds llke some thing more than twice the distance necessary, to cover before finding a place to settle down. ...s Possibly 1t was not odd that Miss Bronfsiawa Machszewsychowlysk was married to Nickel soznow in New York
 
 name would do her best to change 1t.
 The Elements Get Busy.
 With a man from India (Peel was his name and Bombay his home) De- ing prostrated by the heat of a Sep- fernber day in New York, 6 reader Is prepared to be surprised at nothing in the way of queer weather freaks
 Kansas as usual produced the ex- pected. The smith County Pioneer" tells the story. with farmer Tucker as hero. Mrs. T. and the three infant Ts sharing honors. A tornado was sights cd but Tucker. Senior, laid by with & broken leg, couldn't run, and hts loyal family promptly decided to stand by him. So they all piled upon the in. valid's bed A moment later MFs. T. came to, fifty yards off; the two little girls were in a bed of the creek, the small son was sitting on the straw pile -au unhurf The house had been swept away--al except the floor. on which (why not?) sti1l stood the bed, and on 1t lay the husband and father without scratch.
 Lightning did more than its share this year. Near Herrick, S. D.. Frank Herman, driven from well-disging by heavy rain storm. returned with the clearing sky to flpd his work complet- ed for him by a bolt. and the water flowing freely. Connecticut (one storm was March 20 and the other EJuIy 19l. did better than that. Thaddeus Hav- ens' COW has an iron tip to her horn, (Thad lives at East Farms). and the fRhtning striking that turned the evenings milk magneta-co1ored. In Union City a four pound rat, practical 1y thrashed by Albert Monserouski's big cat, was set free by a more-than- usually -conaiderate bolt, while next door Mrs Jennie Scoville's clock, which hadn't been running for decade, was set agoing, and has since been doing tirae-and- half time.
 aq Do Hereby Bequeath--" All sorts of queer wills have gone to probate since Jahusry last came in. Merely to tabulate few of the strang- est will show which way the years wind of this sort has been blowing.
 Under date of January 42 H. C.. Sullivan, of New York City, decresd that his bones should be used for but tons, his skin for pouches, and certain other portions of his no-longer-useful~ to-him anatomy for violin strings. Scarce need to add that the testatcr was utilitarian.
 Miss Hylander of StoclEholub Swe- den. in February, benefited to the snug amount of S25, 900, under the will of an eccentric banker. who had left his count ing house forever leaving a fortune "to provide annually marriage DOT. ton for deserving good looking girl of Ie. with red hair" Which goes Dx. Doyle's Red -Headed-Man's League" one better.
 Having found it difficult toA dodge the