The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-06-11
NO TOWN KNOCKERS,
How CoryviIIe Got Rid of a Bunch
OF Unprogressives.
THE YOUNG MEN ORGANIZED.

Stand the Ordeal Of Initiation Into
the Mysterious Order of the G. BIS.
A Story ct Masks and Spades.
There was something doing in Cory
Vile. The G. BIS were getting busy.
Who We're the G. B.'s?. Oh, just fol-
low this little story and find out.
For aany years Coryville had had
Oh hand ali oversupply of citizens
whose chief activity had to do with
knocking the town These fellows were
but small group. only four or five,
but they did harm. Half dozen mag
gots can spoi! the best cheese ever
made. So these town Knockers, these
croaking critics, were slowly under
mining the good reputation Of Cory
vile by their incessant chorus of defa-
nation. Nothing suited them. They
opposed every movement for the good
OF the town. They croaked and knock
ed and clamOred and hammered when
ever anybody suggested street i'm
provement, a new building, the organ
1zation Of a business mems club or
anything Of the sort
Finally the G. BIS were organized
or course they did not take the knock
ers' bunch into their confidence. There
was Il reason and q good one for not
letting the Knockers know The G.
BIS We're organized in secret The
initial meeting was held in an old
abandoned schOolhouse half mile out
Of town. Grips and passwords and
other secret signs were adopted. Even
Il mystic apron was devised, but it
was not to be worn where aprons
usually are worn. 1t was to be tied
around the head just below the eyes.
thus serving as mask.
The G. BIS had been in existence
ings every Friday night in the old
schoolhOuse, when one Of the knockers
discovered that such society had
been formed He straightway notified
his brother Knockers The group met
in grocery store
"Seems to be something mighty mys-
FERROUS about it," remarked the chief
knocker
Yes; can't imagine what they're up
to-" said another. The society seems
to have thirty or forty members, and
most of them are the younger element
around town, young business men,"
How did you find that out?" asked
knocker No. 3.
why, one of the members told me-"
replied the other
All of which was quite true. 1t was
true also that this member had VIC
lated no rule of the G. BIS. He had
been detailed to acquaint the knockers
with these primary facts concerning
the society Immediately the knocker
in chief had expressed desire to at
tend a meeting. He was cordially In
vited along with his brother knockers.
When the five town knockers fled
into the old schoolhouse at the regular
Friday night meeting. they found a
most startling assemblage. About for
ty men. with long white apron-like
masks concealing their faces and
reaching far below their shoulders,
were standing around the walls Of the
chamber. which contained no seats.
Every fifth man carried blazing
torchlight Many of the others carried
picks. spades and shovels.
The supreme sachem Of the G. BIS
advanced to the group Of visitors and
asked them solemnly If they desired to
be initiated into the order They re-
piled that they did. How can a man
knock unless he Is Oh the inside? The
chief knocker laughed scornfully as he
assented TO the initiation.
THE ordeal is severe" said the SUI
preme sachem. but if you survive It
YOU are our brethren. Advance, G.
BIS"
Fifteen of the masked figures ad-
vanced. carrying stout cords. They
quickly bound the hands Of the knock
ers behind them and tied the whole
group together with a rope Then the
torch bearers came forward, the knock
ers We're led outside, the other G. BIS
followed. and the entire party stopped
on the open space back of the school
house.
w ltuOul Tic AcA Will U4CAS
began 10 dig. the shovelers began to
shovel. while the torch bearers held
their lights high above the group. Aft
er the digging was well under way the
G. BIS started up dirgelike song in
doleful voices. Altogether it was an
uncanny scene.
"Wha- what are you fellows up to
anyhow gasped the chief knocker.
Gentlemen, unmask," commanded
the supreme sachem All the G. BIS
unmasked. revealing the fact that they
were the leading young men Of Cory
Vile. Then the supreme sachem. who
happened to own the grocery store in
which the knockers chiefly knocked.
addressed IL, candidates for Initiation:
We are the Grand Burgers We are
digging your graves. We have reach
ed f,1,, conclusion that few first class
funerals are needed in the interest OF
Coryville. and we have selected you
gentlemen for the honor Of furnishin .
the raw material For years YOU have
! knocked and blocked every moyeu.eu