davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Good Jokes
True TO LIFE.

Thanks" said the tragedian:
many thanks for your good opinion.
i always study from Nature-f-om Ma
ture, sir. In my acting you see re-
Elected Nature herself"
TRY this cigar" said an admirer
OF Nature reverently. Now, where
did you study that expression of in
tense surprise that you assume in the
second act?"
From Nature, sir-from Nature.
To secure that expression, asked an
intimate friend TO lend me five pounds
He refused. This caused me no sur
prise. / tried several more Finally ]
asked one who was willing to oblige
me, and as he handed me the note
l studied in glass the expression OF
my own face. | saw there surprise
but 1t was not what | wanted. 1t was
alloyed with suspicion that the note
might be bad one. / was in de
spair.''
Well said the other breathlessly
Then an idea struck me- | re
solved upon desperate course. re
turned the five pounds to my frient
the next day and on his astounde,
countenance | saw the expression
was in search of."-Royal Magazine.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
sWEEPINGs ARE CITY ASSET.
About $500 a Month Saved by Los
Angeles In Fertilizer Deal.

Los Angeles, Cal.-By engendering a
little rivalry between the fertilizer
companies the board Of public works
has been able TO get revenue of
about 5000 monthly from the street
sweepings that formerly were carted
away and dumped-enough to pay the
salaries of two members of the board
No money is actually paid to the
city by the company which gets the
sweepings, but the revenue comes
through the saving to the city of the
amount formerly paid TO have them
gathered into wagons and carried
away, as the company gathers up the
sweepings in its own wagons. with its
own men. The city formerly was com
PEELED TO pay $40 daily for this part
OF the work
Owing to the fact that the paved
streets are flushed every night there
is but little dust in the sweepings. and
the material gathered is almost pure
fertilizer For this reason the com
panles dealing In this material are
anxious TO make a good bargain with
the city, and II was by exciting them
TO rivalry that the board was able TO
save the city 500 daily.
A small revenue, the exact amour,
Of which It is difficult to estimate is
also obtained from the ashes OF the
garbage moderator. These ashes are
sifted by a private firm for fertilizer,
and the city receives a percentage OF
the amount realized by its sale Not
only is the city paid for the fertilizer,
but the ashes, after being sif,ed. are
carted away free Of expense. The
amount earned and saved has been a
little more than $50 monthly. but now
that dead horses are being incinerated
with the garbage the amount is large.
~ increased
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

Ihis gites fLs Sverige cost O pro A.,
'isioning the neel 80 - rs osnts =
mile VIII the cypress steamers u
the Atlantic the cost IL very much
greater
Thirteen years ago the cost % pro
Dsiuniug the ST Louis for a trip 10
Southampton was :40GOg The cost
Of provisioning the Kronprinzessen Ce-
ellie. with hef increased tonnage and
the big advances in the cost Of sup
plies since 1895. would probably be
nearer $4,000
OF fresh. smoked and timed meats,
excluding from the calculation poultry,
fish and game, l4,000,0 900 pounds were
eaten on the German Loyds last year
1t would require a line of freight cars
extending from Central park to the
battery, or q trains of 80 cars each
to carry such quantity. These
steamers carried last year Gel ,258 pas
sengers, which would reduce the av-
erage cost of feeding a passenger, cal
culating the expense at &C 2-3 cents
per mile, to about s6.30k.
The 661,25S passengers put away
6,547 1923 eggs, which, If packed 80
dozen in case and 100 cases to the
car, would require 119 40foot cars, or
more than five trains to transport.
During 1907 nearly 100000 more
| eggs were eaten than in 1906. Ex-
elusive of poultry. 100000 pieces of
| game were ordered at table. or
capons and chickens, 100000 pounds
was found necessary. OF Blue Point
oysters the number amounted to 1872
$40. Little Necks, 455, 100, crabs and
| Holsters, S2633, of fresh turtle for
soup, 13.4O7 pounds.
The bakers used more than 1000, 900
pounds of -four. Of which $4,000 was
wheat. 1920 rye for pumpernickel
and 1857 buckwheat. Babies drank
1888 bottles of sterilized milk and
100000 pounds Of sugar was consumed
| or vegetables 346.231 bushels OF
"spuds" were peeled, or 10000 DOC
pounds; 24,956.S93 pounds OF Ice. 770.
900 pounds OF peas and beans. 521. 05s
pounds of coffee. 40,976 pounds Of tea
65.267 pounds OF chocolate and cocoa
| l,205.964 pounds OF butter and $12,7s1
pounds OF salt.
More than 100000 lemons and
nearly 5000 900 oranges and mandarin:
were peeled. nearly six carloads o.
grapes eaten and 100000 was paid fol
fresh fruits, not mentioning grapes
oranges. mandarins. apples. pears
pineapples. bananas. etc. For fresl
vegetables not otherwise specified
sl0S,S43 was spent. or raisins alone
10000 pounds were bought
During 1907 2.327,225 cigars ant
packages of cigarets were sold. TO
gether with 5l.3S3 bottles OF cham
payne and 100000 bottles OF clare
and moselle. AMI 5il.492 bottles O
beer. or about sc OF n gallon per cap
ita. Each passenger drank about q
gallon OF mineral water.
The storehouses and wine cellars a
Bremen are said TO be among tn,
most complete In the world. Many o
these supplies. including the ice-cream
are bought in America.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

HNGTON.-What will become
Mr.. Roosevelt's nice young
|Mr. Bryan is elected? This
| is really giving serious con.
The pleasant, and notably the
Wing aliens sojourning tempo
b. our midst" 1t seems an
Of thing to worry about, but
ton is an odd sort of place,
ther cities in many of its as.
BID its residents. both perma-
b fitting, have anxieties and
bilities unknown to urban
where the social population
fansient and changing than it
|ses aver that a shortage ex-
Washington of presentable
|en who can be called upon at
|tice to fill vacancies at a
lble In the face of an eager
Mir Roosevelt has done much
|reating an available and Wis
bly,
|ahe and official society has
bst kindly to Mr.. Roosevelt's
ions. They are commonly
bf as the presidents nice
eD." The possibility of their
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

Ancka. Nirn when a Johnson. "a
pioneer. formerly o. Ham Lake. this
county. died recently IN Northwestern
Canada there was not q board or
plank With which 10 build a conn
The nearest station Vas ios miles
aEay. 4 bachelor neigh bor tore down
the roof Of his hut 70 &C.; boards for
the coffin. and went without a roof for
weeks.
Johnson'E body Was buried in the
rude bon. and frieads drove 2i2 miles
to buy a coin The journey took
them a week. and they then brought
the remains back 10 Minnesota for
iutermeut In Cosion~oo cemetery.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Alien Population for Fiscal Year Is
Estimated.

Washington The net Increase ~
ejaculation by immigration du'iu1 the
r,r, nscaI year was .os 900 Tits D.
The report made by the department q
commerce and labor.
yntll the past ysar g Is pointed out
IL has never beea possible 10 Hscer'
,ain the ne, addition "a the population
hv immigration and ihe rrsali Is sur
missing 70 the department
During he nsca. year she total I'm
migration uas $4,000 Shile 10 the
outward movement the alien emisrA'
ton was $4,000 The hitter figure Is
based on the assumption that he cinl-
grafton for June. fgaTes for which are
NOT entirely Al hand. vas about equal
"a she previous month. DedOciing TIE
alien emigration from the alien i'm
migration for the year leaves the net
INCREASE Of 100000.
Secretary strsus said that ~ WAS
clear from these figures that although
The snigratioE. OF outward allen move
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
COST OF PROVISIONING LINER
$4,000 A TRIP.
No Restrictions on Appetite Of Travel.
ers on Modern Floating Hotels
Only Experienced Buyers intrust-
ed to Business of ORDERING.

New York.-Of Importance not sec
ondary TO safety. convenience and
sanitary conditions In travel by sea
is the food supply of the modern ocean
motel. Every item in the eastronomic
list from little neck clam to a hot
tamale must be on hand ready to be
served IL ordered.
The introduction of the la carte
system Of dining on steamships of the
present is responsible for the extraor.
binary demands for Injuries at sea
Travellers are no longer compelled to
sit through table d'hote meal. There
Is no restriction on appetite or purse
On the German Atlantic hotels a
traveller may now order trout or tench
fresh from an aerated reservoir
Leaving out Of consideration the
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
ital Hostesses Fear the Flact;o,

uopar'ure Tor other fields of ac,,u,,,
o ou. OF Washington, and becomins
actual though obscure workers a.
'ne vineyard. is viewed with alarm
Inward the end of the winter a,
piehehslon was expressed at mo-,
uihher tables lest Mr.. Brvan Co.
70 washington. bringing with him r.
subordinate capacities youths from
me corn and hog-raising states WIN
niisne De addicted to the prudent
usage or MASKING their peas.
over the imminence of this dire
posslDlllty there has been a sad sbak
ing OF heads. Active and persistent
oiiiler-givers in the diplomatic cab
met and senatorial sets" as well as
among the merely rich people, who in
increasing numbers are making Wash.
lngton place of resort in the winte,
months, have found Mr. Roosevelt
nice young men" almost a necessity
IN making their social plans for enter.
talnment and amusement.
In any event, it is realized that the
tennis cabinet, as such. is doomed
II VIII dissolve into it's constituent
elements and fade away from the
scene OF Washington activities, social.
political and sporting, after March 4
next.
whether Mr.. Taft or Mr.. Bryan is
elected, the tennis court in the rear
or the executive Offices seems certain
TO become once more a flower bed
Tor the display of geometrical figures
OF early blooming crocuses or a play
ground for children.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
FrDo BROKE A TOOTH.

A youth skunk into the dentists Of
fee with a panied expression on his
face His nat was gone and bis smart
attire showed evidence OF a struggle
The dentist stepped forward with
s professional air What can 90
for YOU"
The youth glanced apurehcnsiyely
al the door II wish 10 have
tooth removed
Very we'll please De seated.
Shutting over TO the chair the youth
orawled into 1t OF his hands and
knees. TIE dentist looked on in
ama4emeut
Great heavens be cried. whats
the matter with you. Are you
crazy"
well. you see ! went TO cali On
Miss Neverhome. and-aad-"
And whst7~
-'Fido bli me. ledge
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

fS of the lumber cut in 1907.
FED by the bureau of census
forest service, showed the
|Otai ever reported in the
Plates. exceeding by over
! cent. the cut reported for
! then the record year. This
necessarily show a larger
\ than in 1906. for the re-
Fained last year were more
than ever before. The fig.
Pose some interesting facts.
2S,S5O mills made returns.
production was over forty
Fe OF lumber. This Is be.
include 95 per cent. of the
r In 1906 22,39S mills re-
|out thirty-seven and ope-half
FL Since, according to these
|early 20 per cent. more mills
last year than the year be-
Il the Increase In production
|ue over seven per cent, It
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
His Objection.

4 don't see his wife said. why
YOU should so strongly object to the
marriage of Gladys and Sir Pippleton.
He's one Of the incest young men
ever knew
oh. he's mic. enough. as far as
that's Cgnra IA bat he's only %
years old - ought to be willing to
wait while.
i'ut you were only % when you
married me
a vas 'E'rklng Of That Chicago
Rec0Gd.iIa AlA
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

ent death In London OF Lionel
lie Sackville-W West, second
ekvllle, recalls the diplomatic
70 resulted in his dismissal
Pr to this country.
lackyille was born in 1927.
british minister to the United
Pm 1881 to 1888, being dis
\ President Cleveland in DC.
Pa latter year.
pek'llle's dismissal by Cleve-
F'ically ended his diplomatic
p since 1858 he was never
Win any important diplo-
fsion He lived quietly the
country gentleman and sci.
pred in London society. He
'ained a grudge against
|"na Americans, and It was
10 avoid any meetings with
Prom this side.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
(ress May Take Up Hazing Cases

he spoke without having personal
knowledge simply assuming the re
ports given out by Acting Secretary
Oliver and Secretary Loeb to have
been accurate.
The understanding here is that Con
grossmen from the districts in which
the cadets live will introduce bills au.
thorizing the president to restore the
dismissed cadets to the academy and
take the order of suspension from the
six who were found guilty Of one thing
and punished for something not speci-
fed In an accurate manner.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Adds 100000 to United States.

ment. has been exceptionally large. all
Of the Official deures q the depart
meni ~ previous years. when consid
cred In respect 20 the addition 10 the
population By immigration. must be
feduced from % 20 - per cent. de
pendent oa ihe respective years. in
order % arrive al an HCtual Increase
~ population from that source
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Roman JeMelrN.

Roman Jewclry was so elaborate
and so much worn that nothing IN
ancient or modern times compares
with H. Diadoms and flle,s were
worn by Roman women on head
dresses studded with pearls. rubIes
and sapphircs Long gold hairpins.
deliberately worked. were used in ar
ranging the hair Al the ears were
worn precious stones. usually pearls.
while several rows Of chains hung
from the uccRs OF men and women
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
When Greek Met Greek.

Flipson-Young Waggles has got the
laugh turned against him In his little
joke against the Blazes Fire Insurance
company.
Flopson-How?
Flipson-Hc insured 500 cigars.
smoked them, and then sent In
claim. on the ground that they had
been destroyed by fire.
Flopson--And they laughed at him
| suppose?
Flipson-No. They had him arrested
on charge of arson.-Royal Maya
zine.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

the place. dug up the money, and re
buried I, In a place known only tc
himself The woman was unable tc
reveal the theft to the police. because
she did not wish them 20 know any
thing about the matter.
In 1899 ! met the butler in ParII
and he gave the a map OF the place
where the treasure is IIo died In .
London hospital ia 1901"
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
The FLIGHT.

come ny with me-" the young man said
Not in the crude old-fashioned way.
by aeroplane waits overhead
And frets the bonds that bid II stay.
lis but pleasure iaunt / ask
You'll try with me.
This is no lifelong journeys task
Come, Fly with me,
The fervid phrase of other days
Has given way to simple fact;
No more poetic fancy plays
Our speech is simple and exact
l don't request you'll live life through
And lie with me;
l merely am inviting you
To fly with me-"
Washington Star
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Not So Rsd

Mr. Subs latter eagaElug cookl--
There's one other Ting I suppose yen
should know. Miss Flannigau--,Il wife
Is g chronic invalid. confined 70 her
room
Miss FlaRuigan-Thnts fine. ] wpr
afeerd she might be wan ~ thin
chronic ktckers that arr coaflned L
tn kitchen, begobs.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
TELLS OF BURIED TREASURE.
Connecticut Man Says He Knows
Where II Can Be Found.


New Haven. William +.
Moore of Merden has written TO a
Plttsburg newspaper telling OF the
mysterious hiding in the suburbs of
Paris Of 100000 In gold which was
stolen from wealthy Pittsburg won
an Moore Is confident that he can
show her where To get her money
back. He is now working In cafe
IN Meriden.
The money was stolen from the
woman. whose name ] can't mention.
by her butler" said Moore For rea.
sons known only go herself the Pitts
burg woman bad gathered together
500 900 francs 10 gold, and she and
her butler. who was a confidential
servant. buried the money.
some time later The butler went 20
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

Buffalo Park. Cola cloudburst
above this place sent food down the
CANYON and caused Buffalo creek TO
overflow. At Buffalo the water ran
over the banks and trout became
stranded on the land. 4 large number
Of the ish were caught in low bushes
along the river banks when The water
receded They were picked OF vines
and eaten by the people here at the
evening meal
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Not an Apt puoil

Il have at last come 10 the conelu.
sion remarked Miss Primleigh. that
men are not 10 be trusted"
My dear reioined diss DeYouug.
has 1t taken you all these years To
discover that fact?"
And the Subsequent silence couldn't
have been broken with rock crusher
Chicago Daily Ness.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

,s5s and at least one prom.
''stn official OF the war
expect the disposition Of
-1ns cases TO result In the
a !olly row in congress
They base their belief
'' mat the six cadets sus.
year were never found
'AlnE other than hazing.
1'' only penalty is expul.
'y has been going around
Nh< think the six
zen dismissed as to what
'esa-y Wright will make
asks by what authority
ser" suspen dei Such
" t-uiy expected.
secretary oliver. It Is
'fe var department.
s''h his superior as to
, iae action taken By
took great pleasure
mar The president had
D. approving the ind
ard directing their dis.
Washington. thinking
hat been closed and
Diminishing the cadets
as a mere matter of
ai be considered nee,
about saeh an ending.
came 20 him he for
TIE president. When
iacorsed with the
'o'a Gen. oliver az.
n SO did Secretary
invited to Join the
49,, secretary Wright es-
That when be spoke
aaFing been approved
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

carer al aiid the enthusiastic In.
ycniag. the lylus machine IL q very
simple matter All you have to 40 is
go observe the iighi Of birds and APP
pil the same priEciplc'
~Of course" answered the cold
skepiic. and 10 doubt the beat
method OF manufacture will be TO
o0us,ruc, them 40 that they will lay
eggs aad hatch. "--washington Star.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

First City Boarder--Let's climb that
mountain this morning.
Second City Boarder-Great Scott.
man. would you take such chances?
First City Boarder-What do you
mean7
Second City Boarder--Why. we
might not get back in time for dinner.
and they'ie going to have three kinds
Of pie to-day.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Jucuinu by looks.

Church-she says she is only 2S
DO you think che looks itg
Gotham Why yes. think she
looks like the Kind of woman who
would say she was only 2s.-Youkers
Statesman
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Most Economical.

House, Hunter thought you said
this house was a perfect gem?
Agent-Indeed Il is, madam.
Why. the ceilings are very low"
That's SO. they'll be easy to keep
clean"
And tho windows are dreadfully
small"
ITO keep the sua from fading the
carpets"
And there IL no bathroom"
That's TO save soap, madam -
Royal Magazine.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

Hubby--Pray do not misunderstood
me. Jeanette. all ask Is that you
should kiss ME before and not after
you have kissed the dog.
Wife-Hut Leopold. don't you think
that the dog may have his preference.
too
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
Exchanging Courtesies.

Barber-lour head is sadly In need
OF shampoo. sir.
Tailor lin the chair)-Yes. and your
clothes are decidedly seedy. but
don't nag you about it-Royal Maya
zine
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

Jones-His wife earns her own
money.
Brown--lndeed! did not know she
was employed
Jones--Oh. yes; hard at Il all the
time.
Brown-WhAi does she dor
Jones' Works him To hand over
flioliday.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

blessed ten times Is The man whose
nearest neighbors do not know his
name nor where he lives.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
AIast

Full many a flower Is born 10 blush un.
seen
And waste It's sweetness on the desert
air.
Fuli many n golfer gets upon the green
In three strokes. and takes Ave TO hole
out there.
Chicago Record Herald.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08
The SaucN seesa,x.

girl babe her escort named Chaucet
To ult on 4 tceter and toss her
Said she, with thud.
As she fen In the mud:
Such saucy seesaw ! ne'er saw. sir"
Judge.
The Idaho recorder. [volume] (Salmon City, Idaho) 1886-1927, 1908-10-08

First Mermaid-What was the ex-
element about at the bottom awhile
ago?
Second Mermaid-why. haven't you
heard! The swordflsh and the sawfish
fought duel over the hand OF Miss
octopus. and now they'll have to send
for a scissors grinder to fix them up
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1908-04-07
Indirect Confusion.

There were two little girls-sisters
who approached their mother one
day with a question as to the ultimate
end of liars.
Does everyone who tells a lie go to
he'll, mother?" asked the older one
somewhat anxiously.
The raother hedged. She didn't really
like to preach uncompromising doc
trine in this nature; still, an induce
ment to truth telling was much to be
desired.
Perhaps not" she said Perhaps
If you ask God very earnestly to for
give the lie, he will not send you to
hell"
The small sinner looked uneasy; she
had evidently hoped for something
more reassuring. Then suddenly she
knelt down, pulling her little sister
down beside her.
oh God" she prayed, "sister and
| have both told lies Forgive us both;
forgive sister and forgive me-and es-
pecially me-" she finished.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1908-04-07
IN A BREATH THERE'S REST

Breathe Hyomei and Be Cured of Ca
tarrh, Bronchitis, Asthma.
Nature has remedy for catarrh. cpl
denic colds and bronchitis that is far
better than dosing the stomach with
medicine and drugs.
1t Is the healing oils and balsams OF
Hyomet which medicate the air you
breathe, reaching the most remote air
cells in the nose, throat and lungs, kill
ing all catarrhal germs and restoring
health to the mucous membrane.
Hyomei acts like a curative internal
air bath, and has the same healing and
antiseptic effect as the air where the
Pine and Eucalyptic forests give off
their fragrant and healing balsams.
Breathe healing Hyomei and see how
quickly you will get relief from catarrh
and head colds If it does not help you
there will not be a penny's expense, as
Mcbride & VIII agree to refund the
money. The complete Hyome outfit
costs only $1.00.