The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-09-24
Selections
THE PACK PEDDLER.
His Varied Store and Sale That Was
Missed.

Missed.
l had been thinking that the old style
pack peddler was no more or that he
existed only in out Of the way locali-
ties like the Ozark mountains or Phila-
delphia. | was mistaken. The man
with the pack is as common in the
farming districts of Illinois as grass
hoppers or prickly heat
The oldest inhabitant in NY neigh
borhood. who lives across the field
from me, says that one pack peddler
has nested In our part of the country
time out Of mind. Where he comes
from with his assorted onglomeration
OF dry goods and hardware nobody
knows; also where he goes after he
has exhibited his wares and turned an
honest nickel is mystery. This gen
eral merchandise pedestrian has made
a number Of descents upon our house
in the last year, but if he has no better
luck with his other patrons than he has
with me he isn't much interested in
the banking system of the country
He evidently has made an exhaus-
tive study of my habits of living for
he always times his visit so that when
he arrives all out of breath or any
other useful thing he finds me well sup
piled with the necessaries of life and
with not cent in the house All his
visits begin, are carried on and end in
the same way.
There comes a knock at the back
door just at mealtime. l open the
portal and see an overheated individ
ual in the act of crawling from under
what at first | take to be our new tar
paper henhouse. The apparition quick
~ shapes itself into our peripatetic re-
tail store, Numbering for action.
l try to head him off by saying.
'There will be nothing today, Alphon-
so''
Treating this remark with silent con-
tempt. the tradesman begins loosening
six buckles and bed cord.
l watch him a moment and then re-
mark, You need not take down your
shutters and open for business, Felix,
my friend, for there is absolutely moth
ing doing"
Handkerchief? he suggests re-
proachfully.
l shake my head. Then he begins to
unpack and lay out bis entire stock,
naming each article with q rising ill.,
Election.
''Suspenders? Felt soles? Clothes
lines? Horseshoes? Stove pokers?
Chimney pots?"
Have you any watermelon on ice:"
I ask.
NO." he replies. quite seriously,
"but here is fine remnant Of water
ed silk. No? Clothespins? Specta-
cles? Laundry soap? Toothbrushes?
Garden hose? Split shingles? Az ham
dies? Doornats? Ok Jokes? Insect
POWDER"
mo, no." l say. I'm sorry, Angus
tus, but we send to Paris for all our
goods"
"Could l sell you a good snow shov-
el!' asks the anxious salesman.
"No. We have our snow delivered
already shoyeled.'
"Horse blankets?' he insinuates.
"No? Collar buttons? Needles? Farm
ing tools? Railroad spikes? Bed Stats?
Pressed bricks? Barbed wire? Coal
-bins?''
l leave the door open and go back
to the table. After awhile l hear the
buckles and straps being adjusted, and
when the weary merchant has donned
his burden and made mile or so to-
ward the setting sun l think the Incl
dent closed. Then my wife comes
downstairs in breathless state,
clutching four pennies in fevered
grasp, and says: He hasn't really
gone? Oh. dear. And I wanted SO
much to buy white thread to finish my
sewing"-Chicago News.