The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-10-22
HU1NOR or THE Day

Luxury Es:xpensive.-'why did you sell
Wasn't it a good machine7" First rate.
Never got out OF order. But I had to pay
for repairing the people 1t ran over
Philadelphia Ledger.
The Better Man.-"Yes." said the politi-
nomination" But" protested the un-
SOPHISTICATED one: why not Cooley? He's
but Crookley is better able to get it,
PHILADELPHIA Press.
Wsie Is the leap year girl who believes
that good name is rather to be chosen
Wise is the leap year girl who believes
The Bride-I think this looks like a nice,
respectable place for us to eat. Jason. See.
1t says tables reserved for ladies'" The
Groom lin surprise)-But. darn 1t. Sally,
don't you want me to sit at the same table
with you?-Puck.
want we ever had," Yes. And to think,
got her at an intelligence office, tool
Brownings Magazine.
Wyld-I suppose your wffe's will is law.
Enpec-Yes, and worst of it is that she
cant be bribed not to enforce it.-Brook-
Old Beau-williams. are my eyebrows
crumped? vaiet-Yes, sir; but s your r' chest
has slipped down bit-Life.
MY hero has a strong face remarked
the author. He needs it," opined the
critic IT notice his face falls every time
he meets the roine."-Kansas City Jour
nal
Talk about foresightT' "well?" "Old
Gotrox left a thousand tons of coal in
trust not to be touched until the youngest
child is of age.'-Pittsburg Post.
"A woman in New York says, much as
love the Stars and Stripes love the red
flag better She must be an anarchist.
Or in love with railway crossing ten
der."-Houston Post.
Father-Why, when was your age I
didn't have as much money in a month as
you spend an5a in day day, Daughter-Well; dad
talk to dfather?-Illustrated Bits.
Baldwin--The doctor says there are more
than fifty kinds of headache. Do you be-
lieve it? Rambo-~I know 1t. I've fire.
quently had all of EN- In one morning.
Chicago Tribune.
A woman thinks she is getting into So
patroness for charity, and man into
politics when he's asked to march in a
campaign parade.-New York Press.
Karr-What makes you think that you
are going to succeed in business? Bagster'
because my partner has s1ooooo.-Somer-
What J., do you think of the simplified
wasn't SO hard to learn."-Detroit Free
Press.
"Fellow-citizens." shouted the candidate,
If am elected for this district 1 shall
endeavor to make you glad that you did
not elect another" That's rightv' yelled
the dry goods box philosopher, IT reckon
one would be a-plenty. Puck.
Mother-I am sorry to hear that Tommy
Smith tied a kettle to poor dogs tall.
You wouldn't do such thing, would you?
Bobby-No. indeed, mother. Mother--Why
didn't you stop him, Bobby? Bobby-I
couldn't mother; was holding the dog
Philadelphia Inquirer.
"See here" said the tailor as he headed
the young man off, do you cross the
street every time you see me to keep from
paying that bill you owe me?'' Il should
say not replied the y. m. Then why do
you do it?' asked the knight of the tape.
ITO keep you from asking for it," an
swered the other.-Chicago News.
Tailor-There's nothing the matter with
the fit of those pants. Fat MAXWELL,
they don't feel altogether comfortable
Tailor-No? They may be a little tight
across the-er-chest-but we can remedy
that.-The Catholic Standard and Times