The sun., 1908-09-13
mrs. GNAGG HAS A HHADACHE
AND, MR.. GN4GG HELPS HER
OUT WITH 4 FEW KIND WORDS,

OUT WITH 4 FEW KIND WORDS,
Including Some Reflections on the Weak.
|. ness OF Women and the superiority
OF ether Mems Wives-AIso He Calls
Attention 10 Ills Own True Virtue.
Mrs. Gnage having been compelled TO
20 to bed soon after dinner on account OF
up and down the bedroom. helped to case
her migraipe somewhat as follows;
Got another one Of those headaches
of yours, hey? Too bad. Sorry; but it's
mighty funny, hun. how you get all these
headaches. You'll notice that I don't
get headaches. Gee. II both Of us had
that headache habit we'd have q pretty
dismal old drum around here, wouldn't we?
It's gloomy enough as 1t is. with one
Of us always toppling over with head
ache, and that's no josh. or course II l
ate two or three pounds of chocolates
every day and enough dill pickles to
supply girls boarding school and a lot
Of junk like that, all mixed up. why I'd
expect to have headaches myself. But
maybe you've observed that don't abuse
myself in that manner. My view OF the
matter is that as long as we're only going
to live once here on this earth it's worth
while for us to use little sense In taking
care of ourselvesi instead OF defying every
natural law OF hygiene like some"people
might mention but won't. -
suppose you'll be telling me that your
headache results from the fact that the
wind Is from the nor'noreast, or because
the clouds to-day are of the circus variety
or something like that. It's just like q
woman to wriggle and squirm around
and dodge acknowledging the corn.
But you can't tell me such stun. my
dear, for know better You'd never
have a headache IL you knew the rudi-
ments of sane living and applied 'em to
your own system. Trouble with you Is
that YOU overeat. / never in my life
saw a woman stuff herself the way you
do, and it. a wonder to me that you man
age to keep out of an invalid's chair
But women never learn by experience.
Next thing s'pose you'll be munohing
on those digestion paralySing candles
before breakfast, and then
Huh? You haven't eaten any candy
in three or four days? Oh, we'll that
doesn't make any difference. Nature
takes her time about these things. and
nature is now warning you In leisurey
manner that you'd better go allow. II
it isn't candy it is something else. You're
always nibbling and nibbling on truck
that doesn't agree with you. and 1t
wouldn't surprise me in the least to see
=. y-inhf in tn
the kitchen now and prepare yourself
a big mess Of liver and onions.
Some special providence watches over
the health OF women, for they've got no
more idea Of the most fundamental facts
in connection with the science OF caring
for the health than
How's that2 oh, that little attack Of
nervous dyspepsia that suffered couple
Of weeks ago9 oh. l might have ex-
pected you'd pull that on me. Had TO
do that. didn't you? l suppose yol're
going to recline there and tell me that
you don't know perfectly well that that
little attack Of mine was caused wholly
by overwork?
But that's all the sympathy / get when
I have little At OF sickness. When
you're eick. why l stick around and
soothe and caress you and tell you how
sorry / am and all that. but after I've
had a little spell Of sickness you try to
toss it at me that the reason I was sick
was that ate four ears Of hot corn at
dinner and all that sof. II tommyrot. j
could eat dozen ears Of hot corn al
dinner without batting an eye. and that
- ..,- Itt1
wholly to the fact that I'd been tied up
in my office for a week or so without any
chance to get air or exercise. And
didn't have any headache that time
either. Be good enough to remember
that, please. Don't try to switch the
subject; u,
headaches? On now look here, that
tone of sarcasm is wholly unnecessary
Absolutely without excuse or reason.
that hated 80 much as you do to listen &c
the most trif1ing word of advice. You
do the craziest things in defiance to the
most elemental laws OF health, and then
when you're bowled over why you SCI
up the big whimpering and expect folks
to sympathize with and pet you. and
then when they try to tell you what ailf
you anu W manu- you N ~ 49,
vice about how to flag such si,knesses.
why you flare up and get mad and make
things lust as DANCED unpleasant as y ou
can without stopping to think OF how
Internally gloomy it is around the place
already.
Next thing / spose you'll be trying
TO argue me out Of it that headaches
nearly all come from a disarranged
stomach. It's a wonder you. don't tel
me that headaches are caused by q wei
moon or a neap tide OF volcanic disturb
ances at the Straits of Sunda or something
like that. s'pose you had the doctor
here to-day when you got your headache
Oh. sure you did / knew 1t. Woman
never gets the toe ache that she doesn',
ring up for one Of those hand me, three
bucks fellows, and a lot they kpow about
what ails people, the four hushesl
sn ppose the dub cantered around and
felt your pulse and scribbled prescrip-
ton for a little nux vomica or some Other
50 cents worth Of dope. and then looked
wise lust three dollars worth. That's
the old gag, and it's pretty soft for those
ducks, I'm thinking, to-
What's that? Oh, OF course. There
YOU 20 again Certainly / had that pin
head of a doctor around here three or
four times when / had that attack OF
nervous dyspepsia, but that was because
you didn't give me any peace until did
call him in, and there's no analogy In
the cases, anyhow, because was sure
enough sick. / only took the medicines
the fellow prescribed because you were
hollering at me all the time. II had
nv own way about things i wouldn't
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