davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
ROYAL HIGHLANDERS

q oAASH- Fern castle, the able
~azSSRy - kyM representative of this
order in Los Angeles, is
a&H9&&XEF feeling jubilant over it's
A98EIR9H past record. and looking
S4Az&lT forward to new laurels
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
ORDER OF THE MYSTIC
SHRINE

6; ss" a /, afSss $s oss@ S%D; ss@ soss; ss
q !; ;; s; Z:
the afternoon and night of
June 13.
w. P. Jeffries. potentate; D. E. Bar
clay, recorder, and Lucille I. Mead,
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
MODERN wOODMEN OF AMERICA MEM
ORIAL SERVICES

The Modern Woodmen of America
will hold their annual memorial serv-
ices Sunday, June 7, at Rosedale ceme-
terry. Exercises will commence prompt
ly at p. m. Rev. Hugh X. Walker win
deliver the memorial address,
All Neighbors are urged to bring flow
ers for the purpose of decorating
graves.
WILLIAM F. MCLAUGHLIN. Consul
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
SPANISH WAR VETERANS

cgnn At their social meeting in
llSHNI /. o. o. F. hall Thursday
ISsKXI NSTl Tlevening the members of
lsNSSSEA4A! Roosevelt auxiliary en-
ESNpt%zslljo ljoyed the following inter-
IlrAx esting program: Vocal solo,
s you Can't Guess Who
Was Flirting With Me-" Miss Gather
inc Hochderffer; piano solo. Scotch
Fantasia" Miss Street; violin solo
Caprice de Concert" Miss Lulu c.
Heydenrich; reading. "Telltale," Miss
Catherine Hochderffer; piano solo
"Gondolier," Miss Street; vocal solo
"She Was a Soldiers Sweetheart
Mrs. Iva Reynolds.
A joint picnic between the camp and
auxiliary is being discussed. An in
vitation is extended to all women rela-
tives of soldiers or sailors enlisted dur
ing the war with Spain or the following
war in the Philippines to attend the
meetings each Thursday evening.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
KNIGHTS AND LADIES OF
SECURITY

g.; !: 8; ! :; !; !; !
WS Angeleno council No. 1883
~ XMs M dance at w. o. w. hall.
"a <SN5klS |7I -615 Pasadena avenue.
AH1sHAA next Wednesday night.
% This council is noted for
- Its sociability and hops,
and lively time is expected.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
ROYAL COURT

The Good Samaritan club
AZ was entertained at the
kHTEN home of Mr.. and Mrs.
Charles G. Holdridge Fri
HEE6 J day night. Whist for prizes
! 4 was played. Refreshments
were served after the nlaY-
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
FRATERNAL
BROTHERHOOD

A detail of men accom-
panied Supreme President
James A. Foshay and
Lieutenant General G.. S.
Adolph to Corona June l,
where a class of forty-two
candidates made 1t inter-
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
ROYAL ARCANUM

The joint celebration by
councils in Les Angeles
a and vicinity will be held
= at Blanchard hall, 23S
n South Broadway, Monday
evening, June %. Th--
will be a large class ini-
+iofiop from & tn Q.30 n.
Los Angeles herald., 1908-06-07
MODERN WOODMEN

Sunset camp, No. 1890,
meets every Thursday
night at S14 South Main
street, where can be heard
the merry song of the
Woodman.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
CONCERNlING PIC LES !
OF VARYlia t1lRTH:.

Few people who use the common
place picked cucumber Of commerce
each day ever give a. thought to its
humble origin and adventures en-
route-any more than does the aver.
age Westerher, as he masticates the
dried and sunburned goldfish Of East
ern Massachusetts culture, capture
and shipment, care, much less know,
anything about its pre-hash-historic
existence. In fact, the Westerner liz
often curiously ignorant Of things
marine and submarine.
Scudding before the wind with a
bone in her teeth-drat It! cant we
drop that fishing smack lingo?-scud-
ding to school with a pickle in her
teeth hurries the high school girl, per-
fectly regardless Of its pedagree, orig
inal home address or previous condi.
ton Of servitude. Little does she
reck; she is entirely reckless ,bout
it. so long as she's got the pickle.
But HE with me, my brother "narrer
Moo Englanders;" let us hasten to
the B. & o. depot! Once aboard the
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

dow of a passing sky car overhead,
and mailed the Successful Author an.
other Order on the Bank at the same
Generous Rate. This time it nearly
drove the poor-rich scribbler crazy
with the heat; you see he had Been
Broke SO Long! He cashed in again
and wrote:
Dear Sir: Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Ha! Ha! Ha!
Upon receiving which the editor
mailed him payment at the rate OF
twenty cents per Ha-ha!
The Funny Writer got it safe. but
he was All In by this time. Rallying
his feeble strength he wrote, or had
written when they found him:
"Haw!"
The influx of prosperity after a
hard winter had taken away his desire
for it. Money was No Use to him,
They srrinkled some water in his
eyes, and after time he came to:
then he found he had been having a
fierce nightmare, that's all!
Moral-Now,, the Elephant, especial.
ly the. White Elephant, like the owl. is
Bird of Wisdom. and we should he
ctIeful not to joke about him.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
ANTS AS WEATHER PROPHETS.

Their Method Of Giving Warning Of an
Approaching Storm.
Ants as weather prophets afford new
testimony to the cleverness of these
small animals. When you go out on
a spring morning and find the ants
busily engaged in clearing out their
nests and dragging the sand and bits
of earth to the surface you may be
sure that no matter how cloudy 1t is
there will be no rain that day, and
the probabilities are for several days
of good weather.
If, however, you see the ants about
the middle of spring or summer
afternoon hurrying back to the nest
and sentinel trotting out in every
direction looking up stragglers and
urging them to go home as soon as
they can get there, you may figure
on rain that afternoon or night.
When the last Of the wanderers Is
found one picket hurries in and the
nest is securely sealed from the in
side to keep out the water. It Is sci.
dom that ants are taken by surprise
by the approach Of shower.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07


ion Of being Boston born. Another
train, and, Presto, the Panorama! It
changes, and soon you are on the
Pickle Plains Of Michigan.
They gave US cold chicken Cor
breakfast this morning at the little
country hotel, remember: and q
young lady school teacher said she
would take me over to the pickle fac
tory and introduce me to the Cucu,n.
Der King If he was at home.
So she placed her elbow trustinglv
In mine, and we strolled over to the
Pickle Foundry. Imagine long, long
shed. and you go upstairs at the side
and walk in. Down the center is a
long board walk, stretching away in
the distance, and wide enough to
wheel wheelbarrow down, a wheel
barrow full of cucumbers-and be-
side the run are located dozens of
huge wooden casks. big enough to
pickle shark in. AS far as the eye
can reach, If you happen to be near
sighted, they stretch, and holding 1
forget how many hundred bushels
each, Of the ripe fruit, just as it is
shaken from the cucumber tree.
The Chief Keeper of the Pickle
Preserves shakes your hand as the
young lady apologizingly remarks that
you are from the East, and the super
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

= -
q hashappy homes iof to-day i : vass
fund i informal ion.as to che best method,
of promoting health and happiness and
right living md knowledge 81 the worlds
best products. "a "A z
Products d actu.l excellence and
reasonable claims truthfully presented
and which have attained to, world-wids
acceptance through the approval Of the
Well Informed Of the World; not Of indi-
viduals only. but Of the many who have
the happy faculty Of selecting and obtain.
ing the best the world affords.
Ono Of the products Of that class, q
known component parts, an Ethical
remedy, approved by physicians and COM
mended BY the Well-Informed Of the
Woridas valuable and Wholesome family
laxative is the well-known Syrup Of Fig,
and Elixir Of SIENNA. To get its beneficial
effects always buy the genuine, manu-
featured BY the California Fig Syrup Co.,
only, and for sale by all leading druggists.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
SERIOUS RESULTS OF
A JOKER'S WINDFALL,

Now the Latest Magazine which
was getting in The Swim advertised
that it would pay Ten cents. Word
for all the good Jokes which it &C.
cepted and printed. The Funny
Writer. who had been Playing to Hard
Luck. say this; but he didn't believe
It. In sarcastic moment he wrote
up long article, mentioning that
when it was printed he was going to
buy him a White Elephant with
Pagoda on his back, to tote him
Around Town, as his automobile made
him dizzy anyway.
OF course. being Scribbler, he had
no automobile. The Editor thought
the letter was very funny, and shout
ed down the Speaking tube to the
Treasurer to draw up a check right
away and mail it to the author. AS
the story contained S.17S words, the
dividend on the check read $S17.s0.
Hilarious with the Unexpected
Windfall. the author put on his over
shoes and ran to the bank. kicking up
such a cloud of dust and stuff you
could hardly see him, so great was
his impotence to know whether the
Check was good and transmutable into
the golden Coin of the Realm. Return
ing as soon as he got second wind, he
wrote:
Dear Sir: Thanks for your big
check. shall not buy an elephant
after all. as find that my landlady
has an inflexible rule that allows
neither bicycles, automobiles nor 20.
carts to be kept either in the house or
basement. i asked her IL I could not
keep my elephant in the hallway, and
she positively refused on the ground
that he would be liable to get loose in
the night and devour all the straw
mating, not to mention a mattress or
two-I don't believe there is trunk.
full Of hay in any mattress in the
house. Hehaw!" 81
The editor smiled at the idea of
keeping White Elephant around,
counted up the words and mailed the
author another check at. the 1O.cent.
per rate. It reached the Scribbler
Just 40 he was deciding to take q trim
to Ke.o-knk on the proceeds Of the
frst instalment, and knocked him! al.
most silly Recovering slowly, he
cashed In again and wrote:
Dear Sir: Your second check al
hand. Shall not buy the elephant az.
lster Al. Am nov looking at some air.
,Dhips.' u ssS d:
The editor smiled again, instructed
i the artist to illustrate properly So
,Edrawfng . man ooking out 81 the win,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
Arizona Socks.

Uncle Jake" Nef, former lieuten.
ant governor, was discussing the ear,
California mining days.
Flour sacks were valuable. 70
unraveled the sewing down one sid
and you had a piece of cloth abe
yard square. Shaken and washe.
1t made good patches for underclothe
on a pinch and made miners towels
But their chief use was for Arizona
socks One -four sack would make
three good pairs. You ripped the
piece into three-inch strips. Soft am,
nice on the feet. too. Just put your
foot down. laid one end of it fiat along
the instep. folded about two inches
under the toes and then wrapped
around the foot and up the ankle.
with q final tuck in. No darning, you
could reverse ends; wear fine too"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
He Guessed He Got IL.

This story is told on Oscar Ham
merstein: Recently, as he was going
down town on a Broadway car, the
street Gao co4ductor. one Of the kind
who act like stockholders, stood over
the opera manager and bawled:
did / get your fare?''
Hammerstein was in deep thought.
and. without raising his head, quietly
replied:
Il guess you did didn't see you
ring 1t up for the company"
The conductor found business on
the rear platform and the passengers
enjoyed hearty laugh.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

number onesiinuna.
Der ,twos, number
threes, and you re.
mark that r the.
Pickle profession
seems to have q
nomenclature Of
its own. He says
that the farmer
gets a, check. for
the days haul
from the pickle
travis, and, once
a month these
checks are cash
ed, or they are ex-
changed at the vii
lage grocery. for
tea and toast, etc.
T h 9 cucumbers
are now placed in
one of the watts. he
continues so I
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
PATENTS.

List Of Patents issued Last Week to
Northwestern Inventors.
Reported by Lothrop & johnson.
patent lawyers, 80 Pioneer Press
building, st. Paul, Mimi: G. w. Bar
Der, Red Wing, Mimi, journal box; J.
E. Carlson, vermillion, S. D., dipping
car; T. Dougherty, Minneapolis,
MIMI, grain bin; e. Lindblad, Kost.
Mimi, cream pump; w. B. Seymour.
Kennebec, s. D., folding square; N. s.
Stalker, Duluth, Mimi, grain car door;
L. A. Wheelock, Waseca, Mimi, rail-
way gate.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
A Pulpit in a Railway Station.

Travellers who enter Shrewsbury
by the Abbey Foregate station can
scarcely fail to observe one of the
most remarkable features to be seen
at any railway station in the world.
This is a pulpit. 1t stands prominent
ly above the coal wagons and miscel-
laneous goods trucks of the station
yard, an ancient stone structure, to
which access is gained by an equally
ancient flight of stone steps. This
pulpit is the only remaining fragment
Of the domestic buildings of the once
great and powerful Abbey of shrews-
bury. In the olden days it stood in
the monks refectory and was used
for preaching from and for reading
the lessons while the monks ate their
frugal meals.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
WONDERED WHY
Found the Answer Was "coffee."

Many pale, sickly persons wonder
for years why they have to suffer SO.
and eventually discover that the drug
-caneine-i4 coffee is the main cause
Of the, trouble.
Il was always very fond Of coffee
and drank it every day. never had
much flesh and often wondered why
] was always 80 pale, thin and weak.
about five years ago my health
completely broke down and was con.
fined to my bed. My stomach was
In such condition that could hardly
tako sunicient nourishment to sustain
life.
During this time was drinking
coffee, didn't think I could do with.
out it.
AFTER awhile I came to the con,
clusion that coffee was hurting me,
and decided to give it up and try
Postum. I didn't like the taste Of It
at first, but when 1t was made right
boiled until dark and rich-I soon
became very fond Of It. s5..
I'm one week began to feel better,
I could eat more and sleep better. Ny
sick headaches were less frequent, and
within I'VE months / looked and felt
like q new being, headache spells on.
tirely gone. s. ~ +. .ss tx.
my health continued to Improve
and today an we'll and strong weigh
LAB lbs. I attribute my present health
70 the life-siying qualities Of Postum
AsTharosa = Raaen,, III iEss z ~ WIS ~
Name given by Postum Co, Battle.
Crssk, Mich. Read. The Road % Well.
Vile" "a pkgs. s3s,s & 4
0 Evsr read The shove isttsrf A ns,w
.sns appears from time rs time. They
~ ssnulns .Etssis. ma tuIl ~ l,vnss1
ElnteS6ek s5 ss i3sSf 81 3ss
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
The Dear. Old DAYS.

Touched BY his sad story, a Harris
burg woman recently furnished 4
meal TO q melancholy looking hobo
who had applied therefor, at the back
door. ,4i a &, III q. a
Why do you stick out the middle
finger OF your left hand SO straight
while you are eating?" asked the com.
passionate woman. Was 1t ever
broken 2, 3@3 d ss.l si' PSI
No. num- answered the hobo.
with g snume. But during nv
halcyon days I wore q diamond rins
On that finger, and Old hsbits are hard
TO breal mum. 4 II 10 mi q,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

lugger-aboard the
trafn-and we can
take our time to
Albany. Maybe
we'll have to. Ten
minutes for re.
freshments. Climb
on the Buffalo
cars, change again
and there you are
at Niagara Falls
and pile out; five
minutes to see the
horseshoe, q n d
then we speed
through Ontario
for a six-hour run.
Aha! Detroit!
Delighted! Only
city in the VOL.
VERNE State that
ever gives the
clfrh
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
No Further Proof Needed.

No Further Proof Needed.
Ranter-I thought this paper was
friendly to me?
Editor-So it is. What's the matter
now?.
II made speech at. the banquet
last night and you didn't print line
of it."
"Well? What further proof did you
want of our friendship"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
Tho Unappreelatlve Londonsr.

3 49, o's''sPPsTSVS'tssNssv0 @6VH10I0Ts..-l1
London is marvel; but we Lon.
doners do not wax passionate over its
qualities as the enthusiastic French.
man does over his Paris. There Is
more beanty, moro charm. more
wealth. more culture, and more art
to be found IN London than anywhere
IN the world. mn. IA stalid EpsllsA
people DO not rs1asy g 1tD kyciats III!
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

No man can sneak into heaven on
the strength Of his tombstone cpl.
taph.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

rock salt thrown in, more cucumbers.
more saline crystal, and so on and so
on till the appetite Of the tub seems
fully satisfied, then they fill 1t with
H o and let them soak indefinitely
until they get wireless from Detroit
or Menominee or Kalamazoo. or
wherever the Main Pickle Bottlery is
established. Then they send on q
train load in the tank cars, such as
would see on the siding, etc.
Filled with awe and speeches. won
der, breathlessly l said, by Thun-
der!" and gazed, mouth agape, wide
enough to surround the largest pickle
of them ALL
Musing, the Man espied on top OF
one of the pickle cisterns a cuke Of
curious construction lusus naturae,
as it were, such as the Old Dame now
and then delights to produce. just to
make the high brows wonder how 1t
all happened.
But the Man determined to have it
when the foreman wasn't looking, just
to take back East In alcohol to prove
to his friends that he really did see it..
So he started to walk across the top
of the full pickle tub and get it.
There was Loud splash! An ag.
onizing, appealing cry for help echoed
adown the pickle pen, for that partic-
ular vat happened to be full of brine,
with only couple Of bushels of GU.
cumbers or so floating round on top,
and the accomplished newspaper rep
resentative from the effete East sank
suddenly beneath the salt, briny wave.
Down at the hotel afterward he dis
rosed and hung his clothes over the
back of the chair to dry, and then he
noticed that every pocket had Gu
cumber or two in it.
But what's couple Of dozen raw
cucumbers amount to in neighbor.
hood that's got cukes to salt down?
They don't command any more respect
for a fellow than thirty-dollar bill
would down on State street, Boston.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

Beware Of the spinster who asks
you for q match during leap
year.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
caCsB t1aUaclBe2@2nc1g
| The Honor :, Of
a..t8 ;4A y
Nurse Joyce


day. was informed that she had beel.
at telegraph office, at the Office Of
Lady Lees Nurses" and at the u:hce
of Joyce & Forde.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

BUY o. 9. DIP AND DIs1NrECrANr
and ship your Hides. Pelts. Wool. ETC., to
n. w. Hide & Fur Co.. Minneapolis. MINI.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07
Man Must Work Z?

Man Must Work (7)
"Wer'r yer orr to, 'Enery?"
ITO work."
''Wot's the matter with the missus,
then? Amt she well?"
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1908-08-07

STACK COVERS, AWNINGS, TENTS.
Flags etc. For information and prices. write
American Tent 4 Awning Co.. Minneapolis
The Detroit times., 1908-07-16

DETROIT. July i5-Rains and cooler
weather took the strength Out OF the
wheat market on Wednesday. some
covering later put prices up little:
but the tone was not strong. All that
held wheat mp during the earlier days
OF the week. was the hot, dry north
OF a ruined crop. but the favorable
change In weather gives hope that a
good crop OF spring wheat may yet be
secured
Wheat quotations-Cash No. red.
aoxc. for new. and 92L C for old: July
opened lc down from Tuesdays close
at sic, dropped TO sohc. and advanced
to soEc: september opened NC OF at
s2c, declined to slAc and advanced to
si%c; December opened at s4c. touched
sSAc. and advanced to esxc; No. 3
red, Sskc. No. white. 92hc.
No. 3. 75hc: No. 3 yellow. cars at
oats-cash No. white, l car at sIc:
blu at 44iac: September. 10000 Blu at
4sEc.
bid.
Beans-Cash. Sass; October, $3.50
bid: November, $l.75.
Glover seed-Prime October, zoe bags
at $3.50; December. $3.50; March. 200
bags at s7.sS; sample alsike. IL bass
Receipts in the Detroit market We'd
nesday. included 1000 bbls OF -four anu
cars or wheat Withdrawals were
2.6s4 bu OF oats. Stocks are ls4.736 bu
OF wheat, l23,000 bu OF corn. 1886 Du
OF oats. and 1903 bu OF rye.
Wheat receipts at Kansas City, LOS
cars; year ago, SO cars.
Wheat in Liverpool closed y a nd
lower. and corn unchanged to IA
higher.
Wheat receipts at primary points
Wednesday. 100000 blu; year ago. ~l3.-
O0c bu.
Exports OF wheat and -four wednes-
day. 10000 bu.
Northwestern wheat receipts Wed
nesday, 200 cars: year ago. 23s cars.
CHICAGO GRAIN.
CHICAGO. July l5.--Lower cables,
rains in Canada. and prospects, OF rains
In the Dakotas tonight or Thursday.
caused an easy opening in wheat. Sell
Ing by commission houses was quite
general at the start. Buying by Bart
caused a fair reaction.
a s6~c. Corn-Sept., 1874 973kc. Oals
Sept. 43h d43hc. Pork-Sept., 1850
Tl5.s5, Lard-Sept.. S932la a 9.35 19, 40.
Ribs--Sept.. ss.77QS.So.
Wheat showed losses of u 11hc for
the day. and the feeling was beartsh at
the close. Southwestern receipts were
heavy compared with week ago and
year ago. Corn was up y a Nc for
nearby while deferred months were
s.c lower. Oats. hG%c lower. and
provisions were up fractionally.
Closing prices: Wheat-Sept-, sos 6
asked. Corn--Sept., 14Nc BID. Oats
Lard-Sept.. $40. Ribs--July. $50.
The Detroit times., 1908-07-16
ADRIAN TIMES BACKS
HC. SMITH FOR GOVERNOR

ADRIAN, Mich. July 15.-Says the
Adrian Times, editorially:
I'VE have a candidate of equal hon
or, equal strength and mental ability.
and with more and better courage
than any man we have had In public
life for long time. in our citizen,
Henry c. Smith. He has no ambition
for the future. no desire except to
unite and build up the Republican
party. He has never been allied with
any faction Of the party. He would
come nearer uniting the party than
anyone mentioned for the place. The
time is at hand for all forces having
the best interests OF the party at
heart to work up sentiment. TO all
unite upon Henry c. Smith for gov
ernor OF Michigan.
He Is getting lot of encourage
ment from all parts OF the state. Our
people appreciate the honor and I'm
portance OF having governor from
this locality, and will be for Mr..
Smith with hearty support. We hope
that he can become known through
out the state as he Is at home, and
II he we're there would be no doubt
about his being nominated by clear
40 per cent and over. The time Is
ripe for action and organization in
behalf OF Henry c. Smith for COVER
nor"