davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
HVAOR or THE Day

Now. my dear SIR said Mr., Fox. Il
can't cure you unless you promise TO DO
TspysA pr ssl Eox f aaa
Of all. pay me my last years bill"-Phil-
II heard him behind the door pleading
for just one. They must be engaged"
mo. they're married. 1t was dollar
Journal.
hear That the suggs of sf sSs
S Sasf miiiion o, on her sr@Mousaon POST
Marsh-Basley has gone into bankrupt
h1allow-That sol Automobile or boy at
college?-st. Louis Post-Dispetch-
Ardent suitor-I love your daughter and
want to marry her.
her. While your mother-in-law IL trying
to keep you IN at night I may get out
Pearl-Yes. our college had a female
baseball team.
Buby-pid yoy have any sScd ca e. hers,
caught husbands the first season and
broke up the tsam.-chicago News.
mo. I don't IKE that woman" declared
"And why not?'
suit my ideas Of what's requisite and nee
esary."-Louisville Courier-Journal.
The man that going to the devil always
finds congenial company on the road
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
After the proposal and the acceptance:
whatT "Summer-resort engagementsT
Yes" An introduction. should say
Louisville Courrier-Journal.
~, s the se Has h been 4. h s.s
junior. "Ichicago Record-Heraid.
Mr.. Knox-You women are forever dis
GUESSING the bad points Of your nsishbo on1
points. It would be more edifying Mrs.
knox-Yes. but who'd care to listen to
us?-Philadelphia Press.
rs there anything I can DO" cried an
exasperated West Side mother. ITO induce
ySS &c g the RL0aRs
a hour longer."-Cleveland Leader.
Going out of town this summer No.
Can't stand the discomforts OF the resorts.
Always sure to meet some CREDITOR
Bill-why is It the under dog in a fight
Because he's doing ali the yelping.-Yonk-
ers Statesman.
What's the matter with that tall man
overthere7 whispered the manager OF
the big department store. Hes absent
minded" replied the floor walker. ABB
eent-mindedt' Yes; he says his wife
that's full Of holes and he can't remem-
Der whether 1t Is a porous plaster or
peekaboo waist."-Chicago News.
PA. why do you speak of a woman al
a mans better half?" IT don't know. un-
less it is because she carries the pocket
book."-Detroit Free Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
POINTED PARAGRAPH.
IFrom the Chicago News. ]

lFrom the Chicago News.1
But for free speech some people
wouldn't talk SO freely.
Occasionally a weak-voiced man
uses strong language.
In the race for wealth but few men
have a walk-over-
Even a homely man doesn't look Il
after you get used to him.
Some silly people play with fire just
to see II 1t will burn them.
Anyway there will probably be no
Merry Widow halos in heaven.
If we all had our way It would keep
other people busy getting out Of 1t.
A little girl hates to be kissed by
a man almost as mucn as a big girl
doesn't.
There Is nothing green about the
grass widow who can rope in q rich
old bachelor.
Give us continuous contentment
and you may have perpetual motion
providing you can get It.
Many a mans idea Of q vacation il
to get away from home for Q time SO
that he won't have to live UP to his
reputation.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Frenzied finance and the get-rich-
uuick fever. which Is prevalent at
Pittsburg, Pa, is no respeoter of per-
sons. 1t seems to attack all classes and
among the latest Of its victims is a
clergyman Of the Pentecostal faith who
has gone bankrupt to the extent Of
$4,000 with assets Of $3.50. With him
to poverty went many of hls oongrega-
ton who invested heavily In his advice
and suggestion in "gilt-edged" mining
stock. Remembering the edmonton
that tie a tough Job for the rich to
get into Heaven. It may be said that
these Christian bankrupts have a bet
ter chance OF passing the Golden Gate
than they would have had II the wild
cat schemes OF their pastor had caused
the riches they were searching to fall
into their laps.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
AYHAWKER JOTS

The Hutchinson News says that one
FL Dorado plutocrat uses his automo-
bile to drive the COWS home at night.
Lyon county evidently has a few
rivers or creeks yet to cross as the
commissioners of that community are
figuring on building five new bridges.
An Atchison woman who has money
and gives" literally received note
this week reading: IF you really want
to do good with your money assist me
to pay my taxes. have been assessed
too high"
Speaking Of this discussion of pies"
said Bill Sinclair in the Vinland Vine.
''as look from the twilight back into
the dawn of life it seems to me that
the finest pies were the mud pies we
used to make"
by a report from Leavenworth. 1t says:
"A Leavenworth man caught a carp
weighing twenty-three pounds. He
could use it to fertilize his land, but it
Is hardly possible that a man who
would fish for carp owns land"
While moving his alfalfa recently. a
Republic county man ran over prairie
hen, cutting off her head, one wins
and one leg. She was setting and re-
fused to leave her nest, so was caught
by the sickle. The farmer took the
eggs and put them in his incubator
and in a, day or two six of them hatch
ed and he is raising the little orphan
prairie chickens by hand.
I'm our rounds as gatherer Of news
we get very intimately acquainted
with the people we meet day after day."
says A. r. Hansmann in the Kingman
Journal And this much we can say:
Lots more really good people are liv-
ing in Kingman than are lying dead at
Walnut HILL A man does not have to
die before the newspaper writer finds
out that he is a good man."
Some more examination ANSWERS"
from the Chase County Leader: Abra-
ham Lincoln was our first president.
He started the first printing press and
discovered electricity Tho
were very strict in religion
and had forms of punishment for stay
ing from church: some were whipped
and some were put in stocks and
bonds. The colonies had trou-
BILE over religious sex. The
principal events of President Jackson's
were the Mexican war
and the Revolutionary war. Il
Lincoln was shot by Burr.
Louisiana was purchased by right OF
discovery. The colonies had
many discusses and disputes over re-
ligion. -. One of the important
events Of the past ten years was the
Spa war. The struggle
to get Spain was long and hard. They
had many battles before they could get
Spain. One of the important
war was the Civil war. Another was
that the English wanted Canada.
Noted persons connected with our ma
tional history between 1872 and 1861
were Jackson, Hoch, Bailey, Fairchild.
Hayes, Webster.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
JOURNAL ENTRIES

About the prettiest thing in ham,
mocks is a girl
3 =
A person whose brows are ever knit
may be said TO have a fancy-work face.
\
One Of the best ways to succeed is
to make the people think they want
what is being given them.
When a man has sQuandered a for
tune he still has something else to go
through-the bankruptcy court.
v
The difference between logic and
sophistry is the difference between your
line of argument and the other fell
lows.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

the government. He pertinently de-
scribes the present government of Rus
sia as one of execution. That's the
KIND OF government that is most ef-
iective for staying progress for the
TIME being and this seems to be the
desires Of the puny car and his ad-
Visers. But it is the kind of a gov
ernment that will sooner or later force
the people to rise in their might and
drown 1t out of existence with their
own blood
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers OF the State Journal
away during the summer may haw
Inc paper mailed regularly each day
90 uny address at the rate OF ten cents
. weeax or thirty cents a month (by
msil ouiy.) Address changed as ofSen
as desfred. White out OF town the
State journal VIII be to you like q
daily letter from home.
Advance payment IN requested on
these short time subscriptions, TO save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
TFrom the New york p

IFrom the New York Press.J
When a boy can earn a living it's
because his father won't do It for him.
Unless a man Is careful about his
money the FIRST thing he knows some
OF It will be gone on useful things.
Ideals can be very valuable to peo-
pie who have no chance to experiment
with them in practical affairs.
A woman is so proud of doing her
duty she can keep on loving her hus-
band long after she knows she doesn't.
The way for a girl to learn to drive
is to go buggy riding with q man who
can't manage . horse with one hama.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
GLOBE SIGHTS.
IFrom the Atchison Globe.1

Iron the AIcnlSOn IlODSl
Everyone hates the Il am" man.
How much people enjoy their
tongues!
You cannot afford to have things
given to you.
We like warm weather. But it's cas-
lily overdone.
We have yet to hear a barber speak
we'll of a safety razor.
When you are acting unfairly, you
are making enemies rapidly.
Every woman likes to hear a man
talk about his kin until she marries
him.
In spite of the frightful manner in
which they are imposed upon, women
live longer than men,
1t is the disposition OF most people.
when they get anyone's friendship, to
draw on 1t at sight.
A woman who isn't patient when her
husband gets mad, would make a fire
hotter when the kettle boils over.
When a woman does it at home she
sends 1t down town, she calls 1t the
laundry"
When a newspaper makes a notice
that man is singing in a choir. half
the people who read it say: Huh, he
can't sing"
When a woman goes down town to
buy a little soap, and a few things for
the kitchen, she doesn't call that
shopping"
A man is worthless as soon as he
begins to think more Of what people
are thinking OF him than of what
he is doing.
The fact that you had lots of good
times when you were young, is a poor
umbrella to protect you from the
storms when you are old.
It makes no difference how poor a
mans memory, he can usually recall
the exact words of his printed compli-
ments. Including the punctuation.
IF I were a great man, and should
be called upon to make a speech, 1
wouldn't attempt It on Monday. 1 al
ways feei ike the Old Scratch on Mon
days-Drate Watson
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
KANSAS COAAENT
FAVORABLE CRoP REPoRTs.

FAVORABLE CROP REPORTS.
GOOD news of the right sort was
Forthcoming in the form Of favorable
crop reports. The July government es
Inmates indicated 2,726, 900 900 bushels of
corn. which would be 100, 000, 900 bushels
more than last year and has been ex-
ceeded put once, and that by the bum
per crop Of 2.s27 900 in 1906. The
wheat crop is estimated at 69z 100, 900
bushels. or $4,000, 900 bushels in excess
OF last year, and closely approaches the
largest crop on record The promise
for oats Is 1.012, OO0. 900, a bumper yield
and comparing with 754. 900, 600 bushels a
year ago: In addition to a full grain
harvest the cotton crop promises to be
abundant, prevalent estimates being
about 100000 bales; and we have al
ready secured good crop of hay. The
fruit crops. too, are better than usual
There Is, OF course. the probability Of
these estimates being reduced by un-
favorable weather. July and August
are often months of deterioration, and
In september there is always danger OF
early frosts to both cotton and corn
in the northerly sections of the produc-
ing states. But these two leading crops
are not so backward as a year ago;
and, with larger acreage and better
condition than existed at this time In
1907. there Is ample ground for hope
fulness regarding the crop situation.
0AASO PAASSS AoI HcdEAy oil
products are high, especially corn. our
farmers are assured Of another pros
porous year. Cotton and wheat are
cheaper than a year ago, but current
prices still afford a liberal profit to
the grower Nothing more fortunate
could happen at this time than a good
harvest. says the Weekly Financial Re-
view. for nothing could contribute more
effectually toward a general revival of
business, than large and profitable
.I.%~
railroad traffic. and the probability of
a good export demand will strengthen
our credit abroad. Corn is a product
that will be turned largely Into pork
and beef; also giving a big tonnage to
the railroads, and tending ere long to
lower the present high and burdensome
prices for meat products. Surely the
country Is justified in taking on a
spirit Of hopefulness as long as nature
continues as a special partner.-Leav-
enworth Times.
Ex-PRESIDENTS.
The Leavenworth Times calls at
tention to the fact that this Is the
third time the country has been with |
out an ex-president. The first time
was when Washington died during |
the administration of his successor. |
the second when Andrew Johnson died |
in 1875. At the beginning of Lin |
coins administration there were five, |
Van Buren,, Tyler, Fillmore, Pierce |
and Buchanan. a number approached |
before or after only at the beginning |
of John Quincy Adams term when |
John Adams, Jefferson. Madison and |
Monroe were yet living. With a pres !
ident soon to quit the White House in |
the prime of life and a certainty that |
the next president, whether Bryan or |
Taft, will reenter private life on the |
young side of sixty. the number OF ex-
presidents bids fair to accumulate |
again.-Ottawa Republic.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
growth.

President Roosevelt has a new hobby
An the sport line. It's nothing less dan
gerous than polo. Maybe there's deal
Of method in this latest undertaking of
his. An expert poloist has to be pretty
nifty in lodging and perhaps If Mr..
Roosevelt becomes an expert dodger.
physically speaking, Of course. he will
be able to get out Of the way Of the
cocoanuts that the African monkeys
are certain to toss at him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Governor Johnson, of Minnesota, now
takes his place among the famous
seers and prophets of all times. 1t
was plain to him some 30 days before
the Denver convention that Mr.. Bryan
wonld get the presidential nomination
His propheticability loses some force,
however because he did not announce
this provision until after the occurrence
of the event
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

From the boom that business in all
fields of endeayors has taken within
the past week or so 1t Is quite appar-
ent that this presidential year Is to be
an exception in that a 'business depres-
sion is not to be incident to IT. And
that's the sort of an exception that
win be hailed with glee on all sides.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
phrenologist d1iates

A phrenologist dtiates on the
bumps of William Howard Taft's
head to the conclusions that he Is a
man of tact. ability and diplomacy.
Anybody could have made the same
diagnosis who was at all familiar with
Mr.. Taft's activities during the past
few raara
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

There was something decidedly wrong
3n the make up of certain New York
chauffeur. He has gone insane as the
result Of an accident in which he
killed three persons.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

The new directoire, or sheath gown,
has been beaten several blocks at At
lantic city where a young woman
took dip In the ocean in flesh color
ed tights with q light weight and ex-
ceedingly abbreviated skirt.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
Here's hope for the bald.

Here's hope for the bald. A Penn
syivania man whose head was as free
from hair and as shiny as a billiard
ball recently had his top-knot severe
~ sunburned. The skin peeled off and
within a few days he was surprised to
md that hair was again sprouting on
the big bare spot. 1t gives every in
dication of becoming a luxuriant
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Most civilized people will agree with
Hhe intrepid Count Leo Tofstoi that all
of the bombings and murders by tho
revolutionists of Russia do not come
anywhere near the criminality and
stupidity OF the deeds committed by
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

1t has developed that the Philippines
are really of some value to this, coun-
try. Coal deposits have been discovered
there which VIII place this country in
an Independent position as far as the
worlds coal supply Is concerned.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

As is customary in political debates
the one between Senator Chester 1.
Long and Joseph Bristow. a would
Ex-senator. at Sterling, resulted in a
victory for both sides. according to the
claims of the Interested partisans.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Dtrectoire gowns could hardly be
worn in Topeka on a Sunday. Their
openings are Of a decided theatrical or
der. And that's against the rules I'M
der which Topekans are now permit
ted TO play.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
Pleasant Morning Chat.

Overheard IN Broadway:
when I scuffle with him, just be-
fore I strangle him, you rush forward,
knock the bottle of poison from my
hand, and say: Fair play, fair play
Then grab the two pistols, rush to the
window, left center. and yell, Stand
nal for the cabin to be blown up by
dynamite, and 1 fall on top Of Bunko
Bills body with blood streaming from
my mouth. You tear the papers from
his bosom, and as the roof falls on
you, shout, The girl Is mine! New
York Times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
The Song Writer'S Reward.

1t is rather a striking fact that topi-
cal 5ingles are frequent instruments Of
financial success. while ballads that
live long yield scant returns to their
authors.
After the BaIr'-who ever sings 1t
now? Yet it paid $4,000 in royalties to
Charles X. Harris, and the same COM
poser reaped richly from his Two Lit
tie Girls in Blue" Paul Dresser got at
least $4,000 from "On the Banks of the
Wabash" and almost as much from
Just Tell Them that You Saw Me-"
"Goodby, Dolly Gray" brought $4,000
to Paul Barnes; THE Good Old Sum-
mer Time was worth $4,000 to Evans
and Shields. and SO the list goes on.
On the other hand, Septimus Winner
got but $35 for Listen to the Mocking
Bird" which still lives and Stephen G.
Foster. with his "Old Folks at Home"
"Old Kentucky Home" Come Where
Ny Love Lies Dreaming" and other
ballads undying. was at his topmost
notch OF prosperity at $500 a year.
Benjamin Russell Handy never got a
cent for Nellie Gray" and did not
know his song had been published till
he heard it in Cleveland concert hall.
New York World.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
WHEN IT'S ALL OVER.

Nov. by the scent Of gasoline.
What means this mysteryT'
He held me with his eogxled eyes,
! made no more demur,
And thus began that wondrous man
The travel-stained chauffeur.
From old New York to gay Paree,
We Journeyed for the cup.
Where the white bear comes to sup.
Over the ice and through the snow.
By the pale. cold light of the stars at night
And the colder sun by day.
our a aiSa, By q. aay e we i kept our way
Sunk in the Strait. where the seal and his
Play in the arctic frost.
Now the race is done and the cup is won,
But there's little OF fame for us.
Inc crowd didn't cheer when we asked
But replied to our question thus:
Nineteen hundred and twenty-four,
And your labor has gone for naught
For a crack airship has made the trip
In seventeen hours to tho dot"
He stopped and turned into the throng
And soon was gone from me
A sadder and a madden man
You would not wish to see.
New York Times.
Terror of the High Seas.
OF all the terrors of the deep the
newest, the most appalling, the one
which comes without warning. and
destroys with one swift, binding
crash. is the meteor.
Against all other dangers the
mariner may guard. The sunken reefs
are charted save in isolated instances;
xrIo 10
OF gray dusk droops over the ocean,
and for fire there is always prepara-
ton
But the meteor comes kissing out of
the sky like a flash Of lightning, I'M
swerving. terrible, destructive.
There is a binding, ear-splftting
crash, the ship staggers and plunges
beneath the blow. and up through the
punctured hull PUSHES the water that
quickly claims her for its own.
The sailing ship Eclipse, 1,460 tons,
on voyage from New Castle to San
Francisco. was a victim Of the new
peril 1000 miles south OF the Sand
wich islands. Part Of the crew, half
dead from exposure and hunger, have
arrived here.
Captain Lessen tells the story of the
wreck. I'VE had been out eighty-five
days" he says. when we were over
taken by hurricane. The wind was
ming was especially vivid and the peals
of thunder were deafening. For hours
we floundered through waves that
seemed mountain high and swept the
decks continuously.
Just as the storm seemed breaking
away there came a sudden lighting of
the sky, accompanied by a peculiar
rushing sound Coming at US from
out Of the heavens was a ball Of fire,
which we saw but an instant 1t
struck the foretopmast, which was
spitntered into fragments, crashed
through the deck, and went on
through the hold into the sea beneath.
The hole was as big as hogshead
in the deck. We had little time to in
vestigate. Instantly the pumps were
manned, but against such wound
they were wholly unavailing We
escaped In the small boats Just in
time"
The men spent fifteen days in the
small boats before landing on a little
island far on the southern edge of the
island group. Three men died under
the terrible glare OF the tropic sun and
were tossed overheard, only to be de-
voured by sharks. which trailed the
boat onstantly.-Honolulu corre-
spondence to Chicago Tribune
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Ths State Journal 10 q member Ct the
A9socfsted Press and receives the fun day
santsetlou '1 or ,S Se , a9eiustSs sstsrnoon
publication IN TOPEKA
The news u receivsd b Tho state Jour-
p0aa
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

After the proposal and the acceptance.
what?" "Summer-resort engagements?'
Yes" An introduction. should say
Louisville CourTier-Jourual.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

whats the matterf Has he been hard
hit in the stock market?" mo. He has
| just married a lady who II % years his
Junior. RecOrd-Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Mr. Knox-You women are forever dis
cussing the bad points Of your neighbors.
If you'd only gossip about their good
points. 1t would be more edifying. Mrs.
Knox-Yes. but who'd care to listen to
us?-Philadelphia Press.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-16

Bill-Why is It the under dog in a fight
should get most of the attention? Jill
Because he's doing all the yelping.-Yonk-
ers Statesman.