davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Idaho scimitar. [volume] (Boise, Idaho) 1907-1908, 1908-01-11
Wit and Wisdom
-


good man who gave up part of his time to teach
mo the Indians the Christian faith. On of his
trims he stopped at the ranch of wel-to-do and
very religious Swede, and requested nights lodging.
The Swede thought great deal of the missionary
and disliked to offend him. but he also disliked
tremey having pack of dirty, greasy Indians hang
mo about his place, so, after much hemmng and
having he stated his objections.
"Rut these Indians are Christians my good BROTHER
and if YOU can't abide with them for single night
here on EARTH how do you expect to dwell in heaven
with them through all eternty?" inquired the ndig
nant missionary
The Swede perpexed, but, after thoughtfully
scratching his head moment, he said, "The Bible
saws that in my Fathers house many mansions,
an tank hat separate house, Lippincott's.
Christian Scientist of Boston was praising. the
late Earl of Dunmore.
lord Dunmore," he said, twas good Christian
Scientist and good man. Tall and robust and
supple can see him still with his short gray beard
and his kind face His only faut-a fault due to
his aristocratic upbrnging, doubt-was the ex-
aggerated value that he set upon correctness He in
sisted on correctness in eating, in Dress in every
thing
"At dinner in Beacon street, last year heard him
tell story about an incorrect self-made man,
'nouveau richie, as he called him.
"This man was dressing one evening to go out
His wife hustled into the before he started to
look him over
But George she said, reproachfu11y, aren't you
going to wear your diamond studs to the banquet?
"'No What's the use? George growled. 'My
napkin would hide 'em anyway "-Washington Star
II can't keep the visitors from coming up" said
the office boy deectedly "When | say you're out
they don't believe me- They say they must you"
WELL" said the editor, Gust tell them that's what
they all say. don't care if you check them, but
must have qiietness"
That afternoon there called at the office lady
with hard features and an acid expression She
wanted the editor and the boy assured her that
it was impossible.
"But I must see him" she protested. "I'm his
wife~
That's what they all say" replied the boy.-An-
swers
Colonel" said the reporter, Il am told that you
once made fortune in hay. Would you mind telling
me the story?'
The only foundation for the story, sub" respond
ed Colonel Hankthunder, "is that I married rich
grass widow some years ago, and can lick the man
that sent you to ask me that question: begad sub J"
What line of goods do you carry?" asked the sus-
pclous man of the private detective who had repre-
scented himself travelling salesman.
I'm in the rubber business the latter answered,
truly.
+
l got letter from him yesterday written on
typewriter"
That's too much like business"
WELL he meant business"
+
The Idaho scimitar. [volume] (Boise, Idaho) 1907-1908, 1908-01-11
THE IDAHO SCIMITAR.

Lie CdllHlDdl mas lett his den.
The ogre of Corsica has Just sailed"
The tiger has arrived at Cap
The monster slept at Grenoble"
The tyrant has crossed Lyons"
The usurper has been seen at Dion"
"Bonaparte is advancing quickly on Paris, but he
will never enter the city"
The Emperor has arrived at Fontainebleau"
Ills Imperial Majesty made triumphant entry
into the castle of the Tueries in the midst of his
faithful subjects "-Pee Mee.
The victim of the dentist held up his hand.
Doctor" said he, before you put the lid on my
conversation, will you answer a question:"
YES said the dentist, selecting square piece
of rubber and shipping it with his scissors.
"Do people chew more on one side of the mouth
than the other ?"
"Sure," said the dentist, picking up the clamps.
"How interesting! Which sde?"
"tThe inside replied the dentist, slipping the rub
Der dam the verbal that issued from his pa
tents lps-Iippincott's.
Tommy had been punished
Mamma" he sobbed, "did you mamma whip you
when you we're little?"
EYES, when [ naughty"
"And did her mamma whip her when she
litt1e?"
EYES, Tommy"
"And was she whipped when she was ttle?"
eyes"
"We11," inquired the child, his brain cleared by the
position he had just occupied, "who started it, any
way?"-Answers
Mrs. Gaddie-My husbands sipshod His but
tons are forever coming off.
NTre Hooda Observation-Disclosures thew are not
sewn properly.
Mrs. Gaddie-Thats just it. He's awfuly careless
about his sewing.-Judge.
Mrs. Nuritch-I want to get pair of swell white
gloves to wear to ball.
C1erk-Yes'm How long do you want them?
Mrs. Nuritch-See here, young man, l amt talk1n
about rentin' em; I want to buy 'em-The Home
Magazine.
Monte Dee1er-Rymer the poet, has been drawn
for the grand jury.
Shelley Buncum-That's bad. He has mania
for indtng, you know.
A Kansas butcher was somewhat surprised lew
DAYS ago to receive the following note of instruction
from customer: Dear Sur, Please do not send
me anv more meete yet, have butchered miself."-
The Waterman.
'My son, have you obeyed my advice to be up and
dong?"
eyes, father"
give been up against it and doing everybody cam"
Proprietor of Employment Register Ito seedy ap-
plicant)-I have very rich appointment my
books. that of Grand Vizer the Sultan of Morocco
for anv one who can first lend him 100000 francs-
Bon Vivant.
+
The Idaho scimitar. [volume] (Boise, Idaho) 1907-1908, 1908-01-11

First Burg1ar-Whats that?
Second Burg1ar-That's my sample case. We see,
I've lust become a house-to-house canvasser,
First Burg1ar-What we sellin'?
Second Burglar-Oil to keep doors from squeakin'.
Great scheme amt it?-London Telegraph.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
CITY NEWS

Mrs. Wheeler, mother of Glen Har-
wood. states that the rumors that her
son was one of the Hotel Keokuk
holdup men, is false. because her boy
is working at the electric light plant
at Burlington and has fine job there
and is getting along nicely.
John Walsmith is ill at his home,
ia Exchange street.
How Is Your Digestion.
Mrs. Mary Bowling of No. 2eS 9Th
Ave, San Francisco, recommends a
remedy for stomach trouble. She says:
Gratitude for the wonderful effect of
Electric Bitters in case of acute in.
digestion. prompts this testimonial.
am fully convinced that for stomach
and liver troubles Electric Bitters is
the best remedy on the market today
This great tonic and Alternative medi
cine invigorates the system, purifies
the blood and is especially helpful in
all forms of female weakness. SOC at
Wilkinson & Co., and ]. F. Kiedaisch
& Son, drug store.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
For underwear. see the Central
HOSPITAL DEATH
THIS MORNING
John M. Foster of Basco Passed Away
and Remains Were Taken to
His Late Home.

This morning at o'clock at Ora
ham hospital occurred the death of
John NJ Foster of Basco who had been
suffering from necrosis of the bone
in his right leg and came to the hos
pital about ten days ago to be operat-
ed upon.
He was an old soldier and also n
member of the Masonic fraternity and
is survived by his wife and two daugh-
tiers, Mrs. Bell Fisher of Basco and
Mrs Flora Huff of Warsaw. He was
70 years Of age and had lived in Basco
for the last 30 or 40 years. The re-
mains were taken to that place for
burial this morning
On Thursday his right limb was
amputated above the knee. but gan
gren had set in and he was also suf-
fering from diabetes and the combined
ailments together with his advanced
age, caused his death.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
CITY NEWS

Will you help Kcokuk AMI buy
Made in Keokuk" goods.
A marriage license was issued this
afternoon to Frank l.. Smoth and Stel-
la NJ Williams, both of Galesburg.
This afternoon at 2:30 o'clock the
grand jury was sworn in at the district
court, consisting of the following:
Casper Swinderman, Charles Eyler.
H. C. Hodge, E. c. Cobb, A. l.. Linen
berger. j. L. South and p. H. Wirsig
Mr. Hodge was made foreman of the
jury and John w. Carver was appoint
ed clerk The three negroes. bound
over to the grand jury, were brought
up into the court room while the jury
was secured and after County Attor-
ney Blood had levirered his instruc-
tions, the jury retired to its room.
Frank Roberts, the man who was ar
rested the other evening with num-
Der of new nkives in his possession
and supposed to know something
about recent robbery was taken up
to the superior court this morning and
charged with peddling without IL
cense. He was given five days on the
charge. during which time his case
cen be investigated.
The police station has received no
tification of the escape of the prison
err at the penitentiary on Saturday,
together with photograph of the man
and full description.
Four deaths have occurred in Keo-
kuk since Saturday and 1T looks as II
the death rate for November VIII De
well up with the mark of preceding
years.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Poor Tools And
A Coed Worker
That is What Makes Indiges-
ton, Dyspepsia, Sour Taste,
Foul Breath and Catarrh.

The stomach is a good strong vita!
organ. which is constantly protecting
and feeding every other organ of the
body.
1t is the most abused. neglected and
scorned member OF man also. Most
men abuse their stomach with under
cooked food. high living, alcohol, to-
bacco, pastries and scores of ouher un-
healthy practices.
When the stomach at last sickens of
all this abuse and cannot do its full
duty. most men are not warned but
keep up their assaults on the stomach
until at last it rebels and begins to
strike back and cry for help. Man by
bis own abuse has taken away from
the stomach the tools to work with
These tools are the gastric juices
which go to make up the digestive
agents. From to 35 lbs. of gastric
Juice are turned into the stomach ev
cry day.
When poor. poisonous food consum
ers this junice, dilutes it, robs it of its
strength and throws it, a fcrmented
mass from the system. of course there
is Just that much of the gastric fluid
which cannot be readily supplied by
the blood
When food comes into a stomach
es this Juice, dilutes it, robs it of its
power to do their part, the good
strong stomach is using poor tools
and of course, cannot succeed in its
work.
A condition which often prevails is
that which takes place when the gas
trio Juice contains too much alkali. IL
the juice were wholly alkaline it
would not only devour and digest the
fluid but would eat and digest the
stomach itself. Such gastric fluid
does the digestion no good and at
tacks the walls of the stomach making
them raw and sore and setting up i'll
tlammation and irritation.
Stuart's Dyspepsia Tablets will
strengthen stomach filed with poor
gastric juice They will remove any
| abnormal alkaline condition, allav ir
ritation. sweeten the breath, remove
| catarrhal conditions and digest food
/ no matter how the stomach has acted
| before
These little tablets contain an in
| gfenlenl one gram VI WHICH VIII w
gest perfectly 5000 grains of food
They will digest an entire meal placed
in jar without the aid of any othe,
force except themselves. They have
demonstrated this time after time.
Every druggist carries them il
stock: price SOC, and 10000 physi
clans use them in their practice. Senr
us your name and address and We viii
mail you at once trial package free
Address. F. A. Stuart Co., 100 Stuar
! Bldg, Marshall, Mich.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
PERSONAL

F. A. Wedler has gone to Galesburg
TO look after business matters, leav-
Ing for that point Sunday evening.
Roy Rankin returned to Fort Madi-
son this morning after spending Sun
day in the city.
Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Pickens and
baby returned to their home in Rock
Island this morning after a visit III
the city with relatives.
Miss Alma Childers returned to
Nauvoo this morning after a pleasant
over Sunday visit in the city
w. G. Enlow returned from bust
ness trip to Quincy this morning.
John e. Craig left for Kahoka this
morning where court was opened to-
day
Deputy United Ctates Marshal Bert
Dunlap left for Centerville this morn
ing on official business.
w. Harry Nav of Douds was Wis
itor in the city yesterday.
G. w. Croosan has returned from
Brunswick N. j., where he accom-
panied his daughters who will spend
the winter at that place.
Mrs. H. Payne, C. A. Payne, Mrs.
Eva Willford and Carl E. Retz de-
parted this morning for Muscatino
where they will attend the funeral OF
Mrs. Nellie Retz, whose death occur
red recently.
j. X. Eyeman of Warsaw was q city
visitor yesterday.
William Ferguson Of LaHarpe was
IN the city yesterday.
Mr. and Mrs. w. Hennings returned
mn No of
short visit with ]. ]. Tracy.
James H. Walker left for Canton
inns afternoon on a business trip.
a. j. Berger of Nauvoo is in the city
Today on business.
Y. II. Bolt of Mallard is in the city
today on his regular business trip.
John A. Califf of Carthage l. in the
city today on business.
d. w. McDevitt of Chicago spent
sunday with his family in this city
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
YOUNG COLORED
LAD ARRESTED
Attempted to Steal Pocketbook for
the Second Time Within a
Weeks Time.

James Williams, young colored
lad twelve years of age. was arrested
Saturday afternoon at 5 O'Clock at the
corner of Fifth and Main streets, by
officer Malone, but few minutes af-
ter he had attempted to seal pocket
book from the hands of a lady walk
ing along the street This is the sec
ond time he has attempted this, the
other occasion being on last Saturday
afternoon at the corner of Sixth and
Main streets.
On the first occasion he was sue
cessful and snatched a pocketbook
containing SO. He was not arrested
until he tried to duplicate his feat.
1t is probable that he will be sent
to the reform school.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Death Saturday Evening of Mrs.
Levi Hays at the Family Resi-
dence on North Thr-
teenth Street.
ADVANCED IN YEAR
Lived in keokuk For Number o
Years and is Survived by Hus-
band, Who is an Old
Resident Here.

Saturday evening at 1O:3o o'clock
at the family residence, S26 North
Thirteenth street, occurred the death
of Mrs. Minera j. Hays. wife OF Levi
Hays, one of the oldest residents of
the city. Death came after linger-
ing illness which had lasted since the
18th of May, and was the result of old
age, Mr.. Hays being nearly seventy
eight years of age.
The deceased was born in Wayne
county, Indiana, and came to Iowa
when but child. During the greater
part of her life she had been a resi-
dent of Keokuk and while living in the
city had made many friends who were
lifelong ones. She is survived by her
husband, Levi Hays, who is eighty-six
years of age, and probably one of the
Oldest citizens of Keoluk today.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Twenty-Eisht Gases Assigned For
the Petit Jury of the Present
Term of the District
Court.
THE CRIMINAL CASES
The Trials Of Appleton and Richie
Are Set For Hearing at
This Term Of the
Court.

court convened this morning with
Judge Bank presiding. The docket
was called this morning in the pres
ence of the attorneys OF the city and
assignment was made of the jury
trials. This afternoon the grand jury
was sworn in and commenced its work
for the term.
Twenty-eight cases were set for the
petit jury more than could possibly
be handled, but t.le presence of the
jury ready to hear case, often caus-
es settlement out of court and be-
fore the term is finished, great many
of these 2S cases will have been taken
from the docket
Criminal Cases.
The cases of the state VS.. Jacob S.
Morris, appeal; state VS.. George
Richie, assault with intent to murder
and state VS.. George Appleton, arson !;
were all set for trial at this term.
The following criminal cases were
omitted; State of Iowa VS.. Dennis Ger
ney, appeal; Hattie Merritt, appeal;
Leonard Weeks, bond to keep peace;
Gertrude Stanley, appeal; Bulawa Cit
awyc, murder.
The three cases of breaking and en-
tering against Charles Donehue and
John Murphy were omitted until de-
PENDANTS are arrested
Jury Assignments.
The following cases were assigned
to the jury in the order named:
/. H. A. Paddleford VS.. City of Ft.
Madison.
2. w. J. R. Beck VS.. NJ R Hinkle.
3. Lee county ct al, VS.. John Menu,
ct al
4. A. Bauer & Co., VS.. w. +. Brink
man.
S. Jos. Daily VS.. j. N. Jones.
6. NJ G. Craig Va City of Keokuk
Amanda Ginyard vs. City of Keo
kuk.
s. C. M. Hull VS.. c. R. Fisk.
9. Malena Hanson, admx., VS.. Ole
Lind
10. j. w. Jenkins Sons Music Co.,
VS.. Santa Fe Ry. Co.
IL. Same
II Same.
IS. w. H. Delohoyde VS.. City of
Keokuk, ct al.
a. Keokuk Floor Covering Co., VS..
+. E. Stannus.
I Is. Chicago Herald Co., VS.. Thos H
Kollmyer. eft al.
16. T. w Mcdonald VS. General Con.
struction Co
II. State Central Savings Bank VS..
John NJ. Lapsley, ct al.
49, Marguerite A. LeMatty vs.. Lee
county
10. Hettie Collier VS.. Collins easlip
CO.
20. Lidia Welsh, admx., vs. c. B. &
@ Ry Co.
81 D. E. Reeves VS. Henry Sanders
%. Leonard Weeks VS.. John w.
/ Watson.
90. Ellen Dade VS.. S. E. McCreary
ct al.
| "a. ]. N. Jones VS.. Joseph Daily.
/ %. c. w. VanAusdall vs.. Mrs. 10
seph Latta. ct AL
&c. George Johnson VS. Keokuk Bar
J rel CO.
/ 81. w. C. Pickard. VS.. Santa Fe Ry
/ 2S ID. a. Hancock VS.. Santa Fe.
After the above arrangement had
] been made. the case of tle State Cen
/ trail Savings Bank VS. John Lapsley et
! al, was especially assigned as the sec
! ond jury case.
! One new case was added to the
( criminal list being that of the state
VS.. Sherman Horner for threatening t.
! commit public offense.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Surxixinu Relatives.

Mrs. Hays was friend of all and
was beloved by both relatives and ac-
quaintances. She endeared herself to
many by her admirable qualities of
womanhood and her friendship eX-
tended to many.
The surviving relatives are the fol
lowing: Husband, Levi Hays; broth
er, Albert S. Willis and four chill
dren.
Funeral services were held this af-
ternoon at 2 o'clock at the home of
her daughter. Mrs. M. F. Armentrout,
S26 North Thirteenth street and were
conducted by Rev. Sanders, pastor of
the First Baptist church There were
quite number of friends present and
the services were impressive and
solemn. The pail bearers were the
following gentlement: DR.. s. w.
Moorhead, G. i. Becker, w. H. Bow
man, D. w Haggerty, w. S. Sample
and e. S. Cushman.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
outwitted the Guards at Fort Maids
son on Saturday Afternoon
and Took to the Tall
Timber.
TOOK NORTHERN ROUTE
Frank Valentine, Notorious Horse
Thief Made His Escape
and Dashes From the
Prison.

Frank Valentine, desperate con-
vict, escaped from the Fort Madison
prison about 3 o'clock Saturday af-
ternoon, and armed guards from the
institution secured the country be-
tween Burlington and Fort Madison
in the search for the man until dark
ness put an end to their operations.
Valentine was seen crossing the
Skunk river at point not far from
Augusta just before nightfall. Short
ly after the escape of the prisoner
the news was sent out over the rural
telephone lines from the Office of the
big prison, and a farmer, who had re-
ceived the message, noticing man
clothed in convict's garb, crossing the
Skunk, at once telephoned Warden
Saunders of the direction taken by
Valentine. CARRIED in the check cloth
ing of the second grade prisoners VAL
entine is easily identified, and the
man is no doubt wise enough to re-
main hidden during the day time.
That hunger will cause him to ask for
food at farm houses furnishes the
main expectation of the prison author
tiles of the early capture of the con-
vict.
There Two Weeks.
Valentine had been an inmate of the
Fort Madison prison for only two
weeks, having been transferred from
the Anamosa reformatory on Novem-
Der L. He had been former prison
er at Anamosa and was out on pa
role. Breaking his parole by some in
fraction of the law, Valentine was
sent back to the reformatory to com
plete his sentence, and two weeks
ago was transferred to the prison at
Fort Madison for safe-keeping.
Valentine eluded the guards and
made his escape in clever manner
With a number of other prisoners he
was engaged on the outside of the
walls of the old prison in work on
! the new stone walls that will enclose
the enlarged prison.
A strong guard was placed over
the workers, and shortly after
o'clock Valentine asked permission tc
go to small shanty where tools are
kept. The lookup hour arrived and
the prisoners were marched to the
discovered that Valentine was miss
ing, ana an alarm was SOuHdeu.
systematic search of the prison and
grounds followed, but no trace of the
convict was found, and armed guards
were at once sent out in every direc
ton. No clue was obtained as to the
route Valentine had taken until the
/ telephone message was received at
the prison from the farmer living near
Augusta.
The escaped prisoner is wearing the
blue checked garb of the second
grade men, and the costume would
lead at once to his identification
Valentine is notorious horsethief
and is man of desperate actions.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16

Rev. w. T. Green, pastor of the Pill
grims Rest Baptist church says that
there is absolutely no truth or foun-
dation whatever in the report made
nublic bv another Keoku pkaper that
he had been asekd to resign. The
story was entirely false and contains
no word of truth or fact, he says
and he is wondering how such mis-
statement could have been consider
cd
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Sick Headache.

This distressing disease results from
q disordered condition of the stomach.
and can be cured by taking Chamber
lain's Stomach and Liver Tablets. Get
free sample at Wilkinson & Co,
pharmacy, and j. F. Kiedaisch & Son.
TRY ii
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16

TO CURE A COLD ONE oAY
Take LAXATIVE BROMo Quinine
Tablets. Druggists refund money if it
fails to cure. E. W. GROVES sigma
ture is on each box. csc.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1908-11-16
Venerable Couple Were Married in
keokuk Fifty Years Ago and
Have Always Lived in
the County.
IS A FAMILY REUNION
Well Known Man and Wife Have
Travelled Lies Highway To-
gether For a Half
Century.

Mr.. and Mrs. Henry Mollers of this
city, celebrated their golden wedding
last week, having been married for
fifty years.
They were married in keokuk half
century ago and have always lived
in this city since that time where
they have a great number of friends
who would have been glad to extend
congratulations had they known OF
the suspicious anniversary
The celebration was held Saturday
at the home of Mr.. and Mrs. Gerard
Megchelsen, No. 1926 Timea street.
and every child and grandchili was
present excepting one grandson, Kar!
Megchelsen, who is attending college
at Monmouth, ILL.,, and was unable to
be here.
The celebration was in the nature of
a family reunion and the following
were present: Mr. and MS. Henry
Mollers, Mr.. and Mrs. William Mol
lers and family of Summitviile, Tony
Mollers of Keokuk and Mr. ard Mrs.
Gerard Megchelsen and family.
Married in keokuk
Henry Mollers and Miss Johanna
Paustian were married in 1leokulS on
November 13. 1858, and fol fifty years
have made the journey through life
together.
They have made Keokuk their home
ever since, with the exception of four
teen years which they spent upon their
farm at Summitville, but were con-
slant visitors in the city during that
time
Mr.. Mollers is eighty-one years of
age and his wife is eighty Both en-.
JOY fairly good health at their advanc-
ed age and seem destined to be able
to enjoy several more wedding ami
versaries.
Their many friends wish Them many
more years of happiness and content
ment.