Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-08-23
CAV, Come chutes, Kid, It Won't Hurt Youp

ricane deck. But that was filled. too with
mighty army of pleasure-seekers tent
ing tonight on the old camp ground. -
which precluded any possibility Of get
to the rear. while we held the enemy en-
gagged on the skirmish line. reinforcements
in the shape of an ebony-hued deck hand
finally appeared with a couple Of camp
stools. Separating ourselves from a bit
of coin intended for the Bryan faint
tainted campaign fund. we grabbed the
stools and went way back and sat down
in the midst of the push
From this point of disadvantage a fine
view Of the smOkestack was obtained
And the smokestack never for an instant
belied its name. From time to time it
squealed and souawked and grumbled and
fretted and sighed and moaned in black
clouds dear to the eye and the energetic
business acumen of the laundrymen in the
city that Hans Wagner nlade famous.
"Mr. Captain, Stop the Ship"
At last the start was made. W. knew
it because somebody on the rail, who
could see. called out that classic Of tn !,
river boat, Mr.. Captain. stop the ship;
I want to get off and walk!" But the only
evidence we had Of motion was the fact
that the clouds were humping into the
bow in what seemed vain effort to shove
it back into the engine room. 1 know
that We were moving because 1t cost me
two bits to allow my artist friend to point
out the fact that the clouds couldn't pos
sibly be moving that fast unless the ship
were also in motion.
All the same we wouldn't have known
that We were on the river at all If we
hadn't paid our perfectly good money
for a boat ride and that. at irregular in
tervals, the large sails of some river craft
would sail majestically by. The crowds
at the rail were so thick that II you had
mia D4r bat thkavV
it would have showed the end man Off
into the drink. and the Merry Widowers
OF the men and the Waltz Dream hats Of
the women succeeded effectually in cut
ting off our view Of any water except
what We got out of the scuttle butt) DUR
ing the whole trip
Having succeeded in repelling boarders
and after brushing the dust Of the fray
from our clothes, We had just keyed up
our minds in tune with the surroundings
chronological story which We We're prepar-
ing when a sharp. cracking noise to the
rear made us both seize life preservers
and turn around, ready for any emer-
gency. We feared that our good ship
had been captured by pirates who were
scuttling her. but 1t was nothing like that.
but almost as bad. We vainly scanned
the horizon for a minute while the crack
ing grew louder and louder and then "all
Of sudden, Peggy" woman built on
the graceful lines Of hypo was carefully
deposited on the deck Her chair had
gotten cold feet under the strain.
The artist. who Is a brave man. imme
diately rushed to her rescue and after
several valiant attempts succeeded In
elevating her to her feet with the aid Of
a lever and the ships derrick.
Can 1 bring you a couple of chairs,
madam?" asked the artist in his most
carefully studied tones (Which he prac-
ices every morning before the glass;
Young man." was the whitening re-
play. II would have you understand that
l need only one chair
And she turned haughtily on her heel