Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-04-19
N1-MHRMEY X77o Knows "
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other week. Use gWine soutn an Wente
a schedule on de Athletic Coast Line
mot the Athletic Coast Line. but the
Atlantic Coast Line" replied the amussd
Mr.. Hurney.
Yes. sab, boss. dats it-dat sounds LIKE
It," And the old woman departed through
the gate with a smile of satisfaction and
pleasant anticipation OF the melodies ana
balmy cotton fields Of Dixie"
A somewhat similar experience was
that of an old woman recently. who was
evidently a very enthusiastic church
worker. So great was her loyalty and
zeal that she astonished the suave Mr..
Hurney by an inquiry relative to the
congregational limited to New York.
1t was only with dff1culty that he con-
WINGED her that she wanted the congress
sional limited" and that all congressman
are not sinners.
But. according to Mr.. Steele. the strang-
est incident OF all happened the other
week. A citizen. of the real thrifty va
riety, upon whom had devolved the roll
emn duty of accompanying the corpse OF
his brother to Baltimore for burial, could
not entirely become oblivfous to the ever
encroaching desire to make the most OF
every opportunity financially. 1t % hap
pened that special round-trip rates arc
offered every Saturday to the Monumental
city. This particular businesslike indivi-
dual purchased one for his own personal
use. and. according to his own statements.
was DESTROYS OF doing likewis9tn behalf OF
hts brother. with the expectation OF sell
ing the return passage In Baltimore. IN
fortunately q new technical point was in
volved and Mr.. Steele Is now ponderinG
the matter gravely.
Where Do They Get. Itr
Two weeks ago an old farmer spied the
temporary wooden heat distributors which
are lined up at regular intervals In the
main buildings and anxiously questioned
Mr.. Hurney as to how the bees made
honey in such a barren locality.
A negro with scarcely enough breath
left to talk coherently and with bullying
eyes rushed up to Mr.. Steeie's window
last month and in broken speech cried out:
Captain. fur de Lawd's sake how in -
debble is gwine to git out OF dis here
place? Use perambuiated round here fur
an hour an cherry time I come back whar
I begins" An employe was called. who
piloted him to the main entrance ana
pointed out the car lines In the distance.
An Irishman not long from from the
knows it all how the big station is lighted.
by electricity" was the reply.
-. But sure" said he, 1T looks more like
a tunnel to ne. And what do we use In
the day."
The man at the bureau window replied
that the entire roof was glass.
well, bejabers. II is a wonderful build
ing" was the only reply.
And SO 1t is a wonderful structure. lne
roof of the concourse appears as the very
sky itself and so deceptive is 1t that an
old gentleman. according to Mr.. Hurney.
walked up and down with his umbrella
raised for many minutes before he be-
came conscious of the roof above him.
Imagine the CONSERVATION of the informa.
ton man when a lady sought him In for
NAL interview and complained OF .
draught.
A Family Mix Up.
Not many days ago an Italian imu1f-
grant and his wife were travelling to New
York via Washington. Their tickets were
only good this far. and upon arriving here 4
the husband left his wife on the Baiti-
more and Ohio train and proceeded to
buy tickets to complete the journey 10
New York Either by mistake or ignof-
ance he purchased the tickets over the
Pennsylvania line and only had time to
catch his train. 1t thus happened that the
Italian was speeding to New York on one
road with two tickets and his wife Ten
another without transportation or money.
OF course the woman. became frantic and
In short time telegraphic communication
revealed the, situation TO the authorities
here. By very rapid and painstakins:
titled at Jersey City and before the trains
arrived the transportation dincujttes
were adjusted and the unhappy pair were
again united. 80
An old .colored uncle" of the ante
bellum period, with white cropped hair
and all the characteristics OF his old
southern environment plainly stamped
upon him. became lost In the station. 9nd
asked the man who knows II ali IN almost
pathetic words: us dis here Washing
ton? No, sab. boss dis here amt Wash
ington. Whar is de old station. an whar
is Pennsylvania ayenueT
The information man explained the de-
mise of the old station. The old. bent
darby rubbed his eyes IN beWilderment
and cried: Good Lawd. Is dis Niger
dreamin' - r...- -~..-.--- -
Mr.. Hurney then became interested in
the old man. and asked him where he was
going.
ITO what placer" inquired Mr.. Hur-
ney.
Don't know. boss: rse- just swtns
north"
'But you surely are bound for some
definite place. Where is your4icket?"
"Ain'r got none. sah-de conductor done
taken II. but name ober some places.
boss"
IAN right: are you bound for New
York;"
'No. sai1 boss. faint dere-" -.
Philadelphia. Buffalo,"
mo sab" 80
"WilmingtoRr
"Yessah! boss. dat's de place-dat's
whar Use bound furr
The night man. who knows u all. took
the old man where he could get his ticket
and then over to his train gate. When
last seen by some of the employees he was
hugging the gate post In the small hours
Of the morning. patiently waiting Tor hi0
train, lest he might again lose his. way.