The Nezperce herald. (Nezperce, Idaho) 1900-1957, 1908-11-12

Above the grave OF notorious lazy
man In a Southern churchyard are tns
words: asleep Gas usuai)."
Prospective suitor-sir. love your
daughter Her Father-well. don't
come to me with your troubles.
stella-can you dress within your
income7 Bella--Yes; but Il Is like
dressing within berth In a sleeping
car.-IIarper's Bazaar
Mr. yolgarheim (after the baii)--
See. Josephine. a spoon; one OF our
guests must have had hole In bis
pocket. -Meggendorfer Biatter.
NOW. don't deny II, Rose. You wore
my shoesf" -Only onee-my feet hurt
me 80. and l wanted something com
Portable. ~ eggensdorfer Blatter
what do you expect TO be when you
come Of age. my little manf" asked the
visitor. .rwenfy-one." was the little
mans reply.-The Herald and Presby-
ter
Barber-Try . bottle OF this prepa-
ration. sir. Splendid thing for bald
meas. Cusfomer--Don't doubt Il. but
I've got all the badness I want. thank
you.--Times
Miss Lingerlong- have been a
widower for ten years. haven't you. Mr..
Flint7 Afr Flint-Yes. and am just
as persistent 10 Il rs / ever was. thank
ou.-Smart Set.
Moliy-when you spoke 10 father
did you tell him you had $500 In the
bankf George = Yes Moiiy-Ane
what did be sayf George-He borrow.
ed it.-sketchy Bits.
Teacher-If your father owed the
butcher Si725. the baker Sis-23. and
the grocer sis05. how much would be
have TO pay IA ALT Tommy Iiariumin
--Nothin He'd move
.'could you bring yourself 10 live IN
tat on SO a week. Il could, Har
old" answered the pampered yet un
spoiled darling. -But ! do not know
just how It would suit my French
maid"
\ wouldn't cry like that II were
YOU said lady 10 little Alice
well" said Alice. between her sobs.
-you can cry any way you like. but
this Is nay way. The United rresoy-
terlan.
AIRS Newlywed-I want 20 buy .
steak. Lumberlnan-il Hickory. oak or
ashf Mrs Observation-Disclosures.
Iumbcrman--Yon ind that In the
butcher shop. This Is a lumber yard
Judge.
The wlfe--During our courtship my
husband declared was too good for
him. The FrIend-Does be think Sc
still7 The wife-Yes. especially wher
I want him TO accompany me to church
on Sundays
-Hare you decided. Miss Ethel,
where you are going for the summer!
-Its between two places. AFR. JohRsoa."
(Which fwoY~ ma says It's 10 Swift
zcrland and pa says it's 70 the poor
house. '-Tatlcr.
Knlcter-Thcre are plenty of book
telling hoy to save life while WAITING
far The doctor. Bocker-les. What
We need l. one telling the young doctor
how to save life while waiting for the
patient Transcript
what. going to leave Us 50 soon.
ThonasYv -Soriy. sir; but must tell
you ~ 'ow l can't put ~ with the
missns any longer" but. Tbomas
tappealingly). think how long I've put
up with Der .''-Jodge.
.'rbcy ten me. said the new report
cr. who was doing an interview. that
son have succeeded IN forging your
way 10 the front" -Slr.~ replied the
self.made man. coldly. 'you have been
mislnforlned. I'm no forger."
Towne-Do you believe In dreamss
Browne--I used to. but I don't any
more. Towne-- Not as supersiitious as
You we're. eh1 Browne-Oh. It wasn't
question OF superstition. was in
love with one once. and she fitted me.
"Airs. jerks II you were Kind lady
with i've cents she didn't need. an l
was little boy that didn't know any
better an asked her for II. do you think
she could maybe AFFORD 10 lend II to
| him II promised her faithfully that
he'd pay you baokf"-Exchange.
During the dinner hour ON board a
steamer the other day passenger was
much disturbed by the vulgar way in
which the man who sat next to him ate
. his meat. At last. after watching him
4, Dick a bone In very primitive fashion,
he could control his feelings no longer,
and. turning TO the offending party. he
said: Don't you think you would be
more comfortable II you took that out
on the matr'-Tlt-Bit