The Greeley tribune., 1908-10-28
RALLY
BY DEMOCRATS
Continued from Page

n,e were with him. AlthouG1
a lost cause now, We all re-
that Colorado would have bee ".''
nrosperous had he succeeded
all know the depression In orr
yer mines today. The peone
Colorado owe Mr.. Bryan 1l''
gratitude and they are goina 20 pa.
II to him upon the third day ' new
November (applause).
Judge Rucker.
Judge A. w. Rucker of L.r.r'"
candidate for congress, Is 's
entertainer and kept the a13 a
In a roar of laughter all Il lm''
His peroration of apparent ria,9nle
was overfiowing with truth ana gas
a fitting climax in the compa son 9l /
Taft and Bryan. The oppof zion
getting tired of answering II A's
ton, "Why we are repuh uh..'tN''
They usually answer. "Because my L
father was" A fellow said fa7 10
him once and he asked hi "nat /
his religion was. He said h wss
Metbodist,'' Because M ther \
Mthodist - Because nv nther
vas" "Are Won married. or bach
a,aro" T.m bachelor" why
are you bachelor" Throu-A 'rce
Of habit he answered. "Becansl my
father was"
Two men came to the warden OF
the insane asylum at Puenlo the I
other day, and they were twins.
One of them had been sent there
from a certain county for treatment
and his twin brother accompanied |
him. After they arrived, the war
den called up the sheriff of the coun-
ty from whence they came and said;
"Say, sheriff, there are two men
here, twins, from your COUNT, anc
one of them 10 supposed to b. locked
up. Now, one Of them says he is 60
ing to build a railroad to the MOI
and the other says -c..c.. g in favor
OF the beet sugar industry of Colo
rado; which one shall l lock up?"
Under those circumstances,
said the sheriff, don't take any |
chances, but lock both Of them up. "
Yesterday in New York TAFT said
the reason for the late panic was too |
much prosperity and money, but all
republicans say We are Improving |
right along now. We are improving !
like the wife of the German AT the |
hospital. He went to see her one
morning and the attendant said she
was improving. The next morning
he asked. "How ID mine yife?"
Improving" said. the attendant |
The next and next morning it was
the same. One morning he asked
the same question, How is mine
vife?" Dead" said the attendant.
The German said never . word, but
went to q nearby saloon to drown
his troubles. The bartender sympa-
thi.ed With him. and s:l*, i .sss
Fritz. "she ben sick a iohg time"
her?" said the bartender. "lm-
Bryan has a hard time keeping
Taft OF the democratic platform. In
fact, TAFT has NO platform at the
present time. He 10 like the German
who was arrested because 4he plain
till had been bitten by his. dog. The
German had NO lawyer and the
Judge allowed him to plead his own
case. we'll. you see, Judge, It vos
like dis" said the German. "In the
first blace, mine tog vos tied up.
In de second blace, mine dog vOs
blind. In de dird blaze mine dog
[ has no teeth. und in de fourth blace,
. got no dog in de first blace."
OF course, Bryan and Bryan's
father and grandfather were all
: farmer boys who had all plowed corn
} before daylight and walked behind
: an old blind mule and their names
should. not be mentioned in the
, same blush with the august avoir-
dupois Taft, who had trod plush car
, pets and was raised with a silver
spoon in brownstOne mansion with
marble steps, and two huge brass
lions guarding the entrance.
1t were terrible for such blue
blood to be defeated by a yap like
Bryan. Upon November Mr.. Taft
thought deeply of this as he walked
! down his marble steps and gazed
upon his marble front, bronze lions.
, sparkling fountains and spacious
|, lawn, bedecked with fragrant fow-
ers. There was one particular rose
bush in which he took a special
pride. Walking over to this In the
, early morning, when the dew drops
! sparkled like diamonds upon the
opening flower, he selected one mag
nificent rose, and slowly bending
over to inhale ite exultant sweet
ness. which was. indeed akin to
the total effervescence of the gar
dens of Paradise, Mr.. Taft was i'm
bibing long, deep breath, "neon-
scious OF the fact that a vicious
Billy goat was approaching in the
, rear. The cataclysm came, the i'm
pact was made, and TAFT! Oh!
Where was he? On the fourth Of
November they found the pieces and
tenderly carried them into the
house. The doctor came. felt his
pulse, and told him to make ready
for the worst, as it was all over.
Mr.. Taft received the sad tidinss
; and tried to face the inevitable with
; stout heart. He had often thought
OF death before and it had no ter
rors for him. He imagined death