davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Strange.

How does ii seem to be divorced 2"
asked the curious young thing.
Well" replied her wise friend lit
seems little strange ut first. 1t was
quite Il while before could get used to
sitting down to supper and not having
any one to kick about the food. De
troit Free Press.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Johnny's Definition.

Said teacher, What's skeleton?'
Il know" said Johnny Goff;
Its a man that has his insides out.
And has his outsides off. !"
Mary q. Rector in Lippincott's.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Garden Sounds.

| love to hear the bluebells chime,
And little cowslips moo.
OF tger-lilies roaring I'm
A constant lover too,
But best Of all the garden sounds
TO which | love to bark,
Is when at eve | 20 my rounds
The Johnny iumpups bark.
Carlyle Smith IN IIarper's Weekly.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
The Funny Man.

'.Anybody hates to be laughed at"
''Not always"
"No: not when you have a full house
end no comp. ut''-Nashville American.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

Germany sends 29.000.000 feaih5Ls,
year to England for millinery puFp'
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
He's IN Clink Now.

Sentinel, (on guard. Halt, Who
comes therel
The Colonel-Fool,
Sentnel-Advance fool, and give the
coGuteFsign.- Comic Cuts.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

The best way to pin man down /
the truth is to nail some of his hes
Town Topics.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

After a generous meal she ventured TO
inquire:
When was it that you saw better
Last summer. Washington Star.
-
A Cornish Undertaking.
Notice seen in Cornish shop window;
......................ea
RAZoRs AND PIANOS
GROUND AND TUNED.
London Globe.
-...-
Getting Even with Fra Elbertus.
Gilbert Hubbard says he was nearing
the end of a lecture before 1000 atten-
tive inmates of state insane asylum,
whe;. an old woman came screaming
down the aisle:
My God, | can't stand this nonsense
any longer"
THAT" said the superintendent to Mr..
Hubbard. lis the first sign she has
shown of returning sanity. Success
Magazine.
always look the other way
When ladies cross muddy street,
For even the most modest dame
VIII raise her dress above two feet.
Town Topics.
Better Yet
Can she keep secret?"
"No, but she can keep cook. and
that's something to brag about '-Phila-
deIphia Inquirer.
--..~
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
The Proper Way.

How can you take the measure of n
man like that great finaneierY'
Il don't know myself, but some peo-
pie seem to think it ought TO be taken
by the Bertillon system. Baltimore
American.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

Little Ethel-Mother come quick,
Nurse told me that Nora had spit curls
and maybe she'll do it again. Success
Magazine.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
At the Matron's Club.

AS the club together sat
There ensued some friendly chat.
Said q stunning young brunette
1--WE were married on a bet"
Quoth a dame with Titan hair:
I'VE were married on dare
From blonde came this remark:
I'VE were married on a lark.
There was laughter; there was fun,
All had spoken except one.
Said this queer, old-fashioned dove:
I'VE were married Just for love"
Louisville Courier-Journal.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

Dying rich is a disgrace which youi
heirs bear with great fortitude- Towr
Topics
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Deeply Affecting.

And when" said Mrs. Nuvoreesh.
those French pheasants came by sing
ing the Mayonnaise, it was too deeply
touching for words"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

The only legitimate way to kin time
rs to work il 70 death-SucceSs Maya
zine
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

\ man does not need a helping hand
unless he has put his foot in it.-Town
Topics.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
whats in a Name ?"

whats in a Name?"
Whats your name, sirE'
Wood"
whats your wife's nameT'
Wood. of course?"
"H-m; both wood. A-ah any kindling|'
Success Magazine.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12

Trust not, fair maid, in appearances,
They oftimes count for naught;
The jewelers. name on the box does not
Prove where the ring was bought
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Bv Wav of announcement.

'.The manager always keeps back a
portion of the villains salary"
''Why does he do that-afraid he'd
skipY
mo: but he always acts his part bet
ter when he's mad st. Louis Globe
Democrat.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Quite Natural.

Quite Natural
Murray Hill--Jack Swift is making
ducks and brakes of his fortune.
Westend--Yes, and goose of himself
Town Topics.
49,
Ready to Act.
Proud Mother - And now, professor.
what do you think of my daughters ex-
eeHtion?
Great Musician think ii would be n
most excellent idea. Success Magazine.
-
Merely a Climatic Reference.
Lady" said Flooding Pete, would
you help a man OATS seen better daysT
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Poor Old Bird.

So
Poor Old Bird.
whats the matter with that old
hen?n asked the guinea fowl 'She
looks worried"
"Or replied the bantam rooster
''shes a temperance crank and she's
worrying for fear some of her eggs will
be used in the making of egg nog.''-
Catholic Standard and Times.
-~:-~
True Enough.
''Your love" he cried, would give me
the strength to lift mountains
Dearest she murmurcd, lit will
only be necessary for you 10 raise the
dust. Town Topics.
Quite So.
1--WE. just been reading about Mon
taigne.''
What of him?'
''He said that whenever he saw a good
thing he annexed it,"
We'll" declared the saturnne joke
smith, "be had the right idea for run
ming a humorous column Washington
Herald.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-06-12
Getting Even with Fra Elbertus.

Can she keep a secret?"
NO, but she can keep cook. and
that's something to brag about. '-Phila-
deIphia Inquirer.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
AN ANGEL UNAWARES.
An Item That Deserves Distinguished
Consideration of Hotel Clerks.

An Item That Deserves Distinguished
Consideration of Hotel Clerks.
An item that ought to have the
most distinguished consideration of
hotel clerks comes from Lancaster,
Pa. twenty-five years ago a hotel
clerk of the name of Kafroth did
several acts of kindness for a Swiss
laborer named Krenzler. A few
years ago the Swiss fell heir to a
small fortune in his native country
Some weeks ago he died, and when
his will was found few days ago
it was ascertained that he had left
$4,000 to his friend, the hotel
clerk. There is never any telling
when hotel clerk may be enter
tanning an angel unawares, so it is
much better to treat all corners as
if they might turn out to be angels.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
ANTS USED IN SURGERY.
In Asia Minor the Little Insects Sew
Up Wounds.

In Asia Minor the Little Insects Sew
Up Wounds.
In Asia Minor ants are used as
surgical stitches in sewing up
wounds. The species of ant used is
remarkable for its long and strong
So when the edges OF
the wound have been brought to-
gether the ant is held toward it in
a pair of forceps. It's extended man
dible being brought into the right
position, it promptly bites through
the flesh on both sides. It's head is
then cut off, the mandibles remain
ing as surgical stitch. AS many as
from Is to 20 ants may thus be used
for a single wound They are al
lowed to remain in for three or four
days, and are said to be more easily
withdrawn than the usual stitches
of wire.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
A SUIT FOR EVERY SINNER
WHO RENOWNED THE FLESH
AND THE DEVIL AT REVIVAL.
A Promise to Give Every Converted
Man a Suit of Clothes Brought
300 to the Mourners' Bench.

/
Man a Suit of Clothes Brought
200 to the Mourners' Bench.
Three weeks ago the wickedness
of Garrett, Ind, was as thorn in
the side of Adam Stewart. Mr..
Stewart was, and is, pillar in the
Baptist church of Garrett. also a
clothing merchant.
Today he rejoices that 200 resi-
dents of Garrett have "seen the err
ror of their way" although the
wholesale conversion of the un-
righteous has cost him 200 suits of
clothes.
The Rev Daniel Shannon, a Bap-
fist minister, began service of re-
vival meetings in Garrett three
weeks ago, and Mr. Stewart an
nounced that he would give every
man who was converted a suit of
clothes.
The meetings have just closed.
All through the sermons and exhor-
tations of the Rev. Mr. Shannon the
200 who now have religion listened
eagerly And as they drank in the
words of the minister night after
night they were convinced that
theirs had been lives of sin, and that
it behooved them to be better men.
They decided, a few at a time, to
embrace the faith, and there was
much rejoicing each night as the
unregenerate brethren stepped up a
few at time and admitted that they
had repented and desired to enlist
under the banner of righteousness.
1t was nicely calculated, was the
reformation of the 200. Each night
just enough went over the path of
virtue to keep the meetings evenly
balanced as to results. There was
no "crowding of the mourners" The
suits of clothes would not be given
out until after the meetings were
over.
Then, when the 200 number had
been reached the rush of converts
stopped So the Rev. Mr.. Shannon
announced that his meetings were
over.
Two hundred converts immediate
ly besieged the Stewart store, and
were fitted to suits of clothes. FL
nally the supply ran out when about
half had been supplied Mr. Stew
art announced that he would send
for more suits, which are on the
way. So far there have been no
backsliders
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
CAUSED BY TYPHOID.
No other City in the World Has Been
Scourgpd as Has Pittsburg.

A Pittsburg, Pa, dispatch says no
other city in the country, perhaps
none of its size in the civilized world
has been so scourged by typhoid fe-
yer as it has been. Since 1878 there
have been a total of $4,000 persons
stricken with this dangerous disease
and of the number 1918 have died.
Last year 5,729 cases developed IN
Pittsburg and COS of them proved
fatal Now, however, with the new
system of altering the water 1t is
hoped that the disease will De
checked. or wholly eradicated.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
HAS HALF MILLION GARDEN.
Pierp. Morgan Raced $4,000 House
and Used Ground for Flower Yard.

and Used Ground for Flower laru.
Grass and flower beds come high
in the heart of New York. J. P.
Morgan will have an Italian garden
as an appropriate setting to his new
library building. To make room for
the garden Mr.. Morgan has RACED an
$4,000 house and utilized a $400,-
900 plot of ground. The garden has
a frontage of IS feet in Madison
avenue and is 157 feet deep. 1t lies
between the house of Mr.. Morgan,
which is at the northeast corner of
Madison avenue and Thirty-sixth
street, and that of his son, which is
on the Thirty-seventh street corner
At the rear may be seen the side
of the new library building, in which
ature and art the connoisseur has
collected The beauty of the library,
which is in the early Italian Renais-
sance style, harmonizes with the
plans for the garden. The front of
the garden will be hidden from view
by shrubs and bushes which have
been planted In the spring, when
the leaves are out, they will furnish
a screen of living green. The garden
has been laid out in rather a formal
manner with walk completely sur
rounding it, and spaces for flower
beds at the ends and sides.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
JAP OFFICERS ORDERED HOME
According to a Report Current in
Western Cities. Vancouver, 1t Is
Said, Is the Rendezvous.


A Vancouver, B. c., dispatch, says
an undercurrent of excitement pre-
walls there over a persistent report
that many Japanese army men have
been ordered home, and that the
gathering of the brown men at that
place is something on the order of a
rendezvous. The Japanese refuse to
discuss it, but it is true that several
hundred Japanese who have arrived
at Vancouver from the United
States are preparing to sail for
home.
Japanese Consul Meriwaka is now
on his way to Japan, and his office
denies knowledge of the report.
1t is said a large number of Jap
anese are arriving on Puget Sound
steamers.
Cable dispatches from Honolulu
state there is a movement of Jap
anese laborers from Hawaii to Van
couver port in face of the fact that
the sugar season is on, and that
labor is in demand. Passage has
been engaged for 200 Japanese via
San Francisco on the French steam
ship Admiral Fourishon, which is
due there shortly.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
rwentr Thousand Have Grip.

Twenty thousand cases of grip are
under treatment in Washington, say
local physicians. So prevalent has
the disease become and SO serious
its after effects that medical men are
of the opinion that the present epi-
demic is the most dangerous since
the disease made its appearance
there sixteen years ago.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
THIS TRAIN TURNED OVER.

Remarkable Accident on Railroad
in North Georgia.
The passenger train on the Gaines
Vile Midland railroad turned over
seven miles from Athens. The acct
dent was caused by the spreading of
the rails.
One coach was turned over and the
other stood on end.
There were twenty-five passengers,
and not a scratch or bruise resulted
from the accident. Their escape
from injury was miraculous.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
Simple Remedy for LaGrippe.

LaGrippe coughs are dangerous, as
they frequently develop into pneu-
monia. Foley's Honey and Tar not
only stops the cough, but heals and
strengthens the lungs so that no
serious results need be feared. The
genuine Foley's Honey and Tar con-
tains no harmful drugs and is in a
yellow package. Refuse substitutes.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
no ron nave backache occasional

Do you have bacKache OccasIonaI-
". or "stitches" in the side, and
sometimes do you feel all tired out,
without ambition and without ener-
CIV? If so your kidneys are out of
order. Take DeWitt's Kidney and
Bladder Pills. They promptly re-
lieve backache, weak back, infam-
nation of the bladder and weak kid
news. Sold by Dawson Drug Co.
The Dawson news. (Dawson, Ga.) 1889-current, 1908-01-08
No IpstaIIment Fiend.

Jeweler-This ring is s. more
than the plain one, on account OF
the chasing.
Buver-But you won't have to
chase me. I'm going to pay for WHIT
/ get.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20
COUNTY TICKET IS.
 PLACED IN FIELD
FOR FIRST TIME IN MANY YEARS
 REPUBLICANS NOMINATE OPEL
 GALS IN MORGAN coUNTY-BIc REVIVAL IS UNDER HEADWAY.

Decatur, April Especial. 1.-The repub- ican executive committee of the Joe Thompson faction of this county met at hotel here yesterday and elected E. P. Jennings of New Decatur chairman of the committee and Postmaster R. l.. Sherrill of Hartselle secretary. The com mittee nominated a county ticket as fol- lows: Tax collector, Frank w. Hall. De- catur; Tax assessor, T. w. Wood: treas urer, D. w. Sherrill; superintendent of education Walker Gibson; county com missioners, Wiley Stewart and D. w. Penn.
 This is the first time for a number Of years that the republicans have placed a county ticket in the field in this coun- ty, but the democrats are not uneasy as to the result of the election
 One of the largest revival meetings ever held in the Decaturs commenced here this morning at II o'clock Rvival serv- ices were commenced in seven of the churches of Decatur and New Decatur and these services will be continued for an indefinite time.
 The following visiting ministers are taking part in the services. Rev. w. J. E. Cox of Mobile, Rev. J. O. Haynes con ference evangelist; Rev. c. w. Welch of Jackson, Tenn; Rev. L. F. Parrish of Hartselle, Rev. John R. Turner of Athens and Rev. Frank Marston of Birmingham.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20
SCOTTSBORO MEN
 GET BIG CONTRACT
MASON BROS. WILL BUILD TEN MILES OF FLORIDA AND GEOR- CHA RAIlRoAD-TWo DEATHS IN THE COMMUNITY.

Scottsboro April 19.-(Special. .)-Mason Bros, prominent young railroad contrac- tors of Bridgeport, this county have just been awarded contract to construct ten miles of railroad for the Florida and Georgia road; also 30 miles of trestle for the same line running from Douglas to Valdosta, Ga. The work will begin at once.
 The receipts of the Scottsboro postoffice for the past year were $500 more than any previous year. This means that after July 1 the postmasters salary will be raised to $500 a year.
 Mrs. Mccullough, widow of the late A. E. Mccullough of Paint Rock Valley, died a few days ago, at the home of her daugh- ter. Mrs. Henry Arnold, at Gurley. She was A most excellent Christian woman
 Thomas D. Berry died near Limrock Ias+ Saturday,. He was a good citizen and leaves a wife and several children
 R. B. Hill a prominent farmer of Iu- nalo near this place, died of consump- tion last Monday. He leaves large family. ., ,+
 man named Davis was arrested at Carnenter. this county, Saturday on the sernus charge of stealing a fine horse in C,hattanooga, Tenn, about two weeks 600 The arrest was made by Deputy S5er;ff D. w. Gross of Bridgeport. Davls had sold the animal to MT Tate ana -,,as op the point of leaving the state. ue was taken to Jasper, Tenn, by Mar- shall Heaskin and placed in jail.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20
MURPHY WILL REORGANIzE
 STATE DEMOCRATIC MACHINE

New York, Aprl 19.-(Special) )-Leader Murphys plans for recognizing the state democratic machine did not end with his manipulating the makeup of the state committee by rejecting half a dozen up state committeeman and seven of McCar- ren's members from Kings county. Mur- phy will go further than that. He will try to oust Norman E. Mack, national committeeman from this state, from his position at the national convention. That is one of the reasons why William J. Connors, the upstate leader, went to Rochester to have a private conference with William J. Bryan, and to make an appointment with Bryan to meet Murphy in this state.
 Senator McCarren had little to say to- day. It was reported that Conreid Has senflug, the only member of the state committee he has left in Brooklyn, turned his proxy over to McCarren so that the latter could sit at state committee meet ings as of yore. No confirmation or de- nial of this report could be had
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20
TEACHER SUES FOR
 $55,OOO DAMAGES

Atlanta, April 19.-(Special)-Prof. J. H. Bailey, former principal of the High school at Cannon, Ga, who was horse whipped and driven from his school Feb ruary last by a company of women, has filed suit in the United States court in Atlanta for $35,O00 damages against g cit izens of Cannon.
 The story sets forth that Professor Bailey was drawing a salary of $l5OO year when suddenly one morning he was set upon by the defendants with horse- whips. beaten, bruised and wounded, elected from the building and forced 10 give up the keys. Furthermore. the Dill alleges, he was so threatened with further violence that he had to leave the state and seek home in Chattanooga, Tenn, where he now resides. While the whip ping was in progress, it is alleged, great crowd of people, among them 200 school children. were present, fact which great ly aggravated the humiliating situation
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20
CObing1On County SlOD
 M ImpYObing We Roads
Bond Issue Was Overwhelmingly Defeated But Prominent C izens Are Still Agtating Question of Solving
 the Knotty Highway Problem.
BY A. R. POWELL.

Andalusia April 19.-(speeial)-se weeks ago an election was held in this (Covington) county to determine by vote of the qualified electors whether $15OOO0 county road bonds should be issued for the purpose of building good roads over the main thoroughfares of the county. From the inception of the movement 1t was plain to be seen that the enterprise would be overwhelmingly defeated, and when the ballots were counted the most sanguine anti-bond issue advocate was not in the least disappointed over the outcome of the election. Every beat in the county went against the proposed measure. in some of them not a single vote having been cast in favor of the issuance of the bonds
 This overwhelming defeat of the bond issue was not due to the fact that the county is not in need of better roads; neither was it because of the fact that the citizens of the county do not want an im- proved system of highways. The failure of the measure to carry was due to combination of circumstances. Innate prejudice against long time indebtedness. fear that the funds would not be properly and equitably expended, rivalry of cer- tain sections toward other sections of the county, the idea cherished by many that the good roads would be built by the other fellows premises, and the unrelenting hatred which the man behind the mule has for the "benzine buggies' all operated more or less to defeat the move to issue nfu fa h1,i1J
 But the question of good roads is still being discussed. Not only is it being dis cussed by those who advocated the bond issue, but the matter is being agitated by those who fought the bond issue. The business men, professional men, farmers, men in all the walks of life realize that the roads of the county are in a terrible
The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-04-20

St. Paul, Minn. April 19.-The opening of the fishing season in Minnesota has revealed condition of things almost un- paralleled in the annals of this favorite sport It has been known to fishermen for some time that there was an abund- ant supply of fish in the lakes and creeks, and that the finest sport could be ex- pected. Since the season opened every train from St, Paul has been crowded with fishermen, and from every fishing ground in the state reports are arfiV- ing that the fish are running through the creeks connecting the various lakes, in such shoals that at times it is diff cult to cross the creeks without stepping on them. At Fergus Falls, a favorite fishing place, the banks of the creeks are lined with spectators who stand and watch the fishermen pick out the largest and best fish with their hands, as they swim past The law permits the spear ing of pickerel, suckers, and variety known here as red horse. At one point