davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Guided BY q Spider.

A spider was the direct cause of
most serious loss and injury to the
Dutch nation at the time of the at
tack upon Holland by France in the
year 1894. A French prisoner at
Utrecht, who had spent some of his
long, lonely hours in studying the
habits of spiders on the walls Of his
cell, was able by watching them to
forecast the coming of rain or of
frost. At a time when a sudden
thaw raised the prospects of the
Dutch and seemed to destroy the
prisoners hope Of rescue by his
countrymen his humble friends upon
the wall gave him sure signs of a
renewal Of the frost. Upon this he
managed to send a message to as
sure the French generals that with
in a few days their troops would be
able to pass over the frozen waters,
a prediction that was soon fulfilled,
and so it came to pass that a spider
was responsible for the release OF
Quartermaster Disjonval and for the
conquest of the Dutch.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
THE MALlGNED BARBER.
A Defense of the Meek and LowIy Ten
serial Artist.

The professional huhorist has
few Jokes which have survived the
fall of dynasties and the crash OF
worlds and which win pursue their
triumphant career until Gabriel APP
pears with his official announce
ment, "Time is, time was, but time
shall be no more"
One of these jokes relates to the
loquacity Of BARRIERS. Because of
the industrious professional humor-
ist the tonsorial artist has to live
down a worldwide reputation for
idle, superAuous and Improbable
conversation.
Have you ever seen barber who
talked too much? The Gazette ney-
er has.
When you go into the temple Of
the barber to have an operation per-
formed upon your aching whiskers
you will find him and his associates
attending to their work quietly and
industriously. If they are not busy
they will all go quietly to their
chairs, treating you with pleasant
courtesy, but not volunteering any
conversation. If you insist upon dis
cussing the living issues of the day
while your alfalfa is being mown
you will probably have an attentive
listener, but there will be no de-
bate. The barber who is making
your face look human will let you
do the talking.
Many worthy old men and women
who shave themselves or don't shave
at all have a deep seated idea that
a barber shop is wicked sort Of
place, where people read sporting
papers and tell yellow stories and
exchange spawned jokes. This Is
also entirely erroneous. Pink pa
pers are no longer seen in first rate
barber shops, and the customer CIV
en- to vulgar language would soon
be made to understand that his
patronage was not wanted at such a
place.
There are low down barber shops,
Just as there are low down drug
stores, hotels and grocery stores
But in the places of the better class
the atmosphere is always good and
clean, and the proprietors, being
decent and respectable themselves,
do not want the money-or the con-
versation-of those who are not de-
cent and respectable.
So much for men who have been
misrepresented and maligned by jay
humorists.-Emporia Gazette.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Nine Points of the Law.

Jimmy came running in to his
mother from where he and his little
brother had been playing with a
football and in apparent excitement
held up his right hand. :,
"Oh, mamma" he exclaimed,
George can't use this handp
"Mercyp excitedly exclaimed his
mother as she started for the door;
"What in the world is the matter p
"Nothing's the matter" explained Inc
Robbie, getting out Of the way. HE
won't want to use it cos it'a miner
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
su.II.st Bone In the Human Body.

The smallest bones in the human
body are to be found in the ear.
The smallest of these is known by
the anatomical name of stapes. 1t
has a head, neck and two launches
and is shaped not unlike a stirrup
iron. The full extent of its dimen-
sions does not exceed that of a pea
and is frequently smaller. By some
authorities it has been named the
lenticular bone, from the idea that
its shape and appearance resemble
that of a lens. It is situated within
the drum of the ear.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
He Complied.

A distinguished Belgian lady, says
German paper, wrote the follow
ing note to the famous cellist, Ser
vais:
We give next Thursday banquet, fol-
lowed by a reception and ball. NJ dc q.
and 1 shall be most happy to see you
with U.S. Cordially,
BARONESS DE q.
P. s.-Do not forget to send your vio-
loncello.
The baroness had not long to wait
for the artists reply. 1t ran as fol-
lows:
My Dear Baroness-A pressing engage
ment necessitates my leaving Brussels
Immediately. so 1 am forced, though with
great regret, to decline your very kind
Invitation for Thursday. Sincerely,
SERVAIS
p. SIN accordance with your wish
am sending you my violoncello.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Reware Of the Talk Wire Girl.

"You know that red headed cash
Ter that had the nerve to complain
of me to the boss the other day,
said the girl at the telephone desk;
"Well, l got even with him, all
right. He isn't married, but he's
got best girl. Her father owns a
Shoe factory oven in jersey and
rich-my! Well, she called him up
the other afternoon at her usual
time. Is Mr.. Smith there? she
asks in her most romanticist voice,
Yes l answers, just as honeyllke
as she. It's his wife wants him,
isn't it?' With that Miss Girl hung
up with such a jerk my ear hurt.
Smith goes around wondering why
she does not call him up. Every
time he dares he says to me, Has
any one called me on the phone,
Miss Limit And I look as limo
cent as kid and shake my head,
NO. 1 tell you, us telephone girls
can turn 10Y to the bride into
'nothin' doin' any time we please.
Ne for us."-New York Times.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
The VoIIey at the Grave.

Every one who has attended a
naval or military funeral will re-
member that the last thing is a
volley which is fred over the grave
of the departed comrade; then the
bugle call "taps" is sounded. This
is a relic of the dark ages. 1t was
believed that noise kept away the
evil spirits, and for this reason a
bell was sounded. When firearms
were invented volley firing was sub
stituted for the bell, the belief be-
ing that the sound of battle was
moro oficacious for the soldier.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
DOCTORS DlLEMMAS.
The Question of Revealing the En-
pIoyee's Condition.


Many dilemmas arise from the
doctors duty of keeping his pa
tents secrets. There was recently
the much discussed case of a doctor
who discovered that signalman on
o railway was in such an unsound
condition that he might have been
the cause of an accident. What
was the doctors duty? Was it
right for him to keep the patients
secret, or should he have disclosed
the fact to the directors of the com
pany ? 1t seemed quite clear that the
signalman could have brought an
action for damages against the doc
tor, but it is very doubtful if any
jury would have let the doctor -suf-
Fer in the circumstances.
Lay, legal and medical opinion
differed greatly in the matter. OF
course it was the doctors duty to
use all his influence to get the man
voluntarily to permit him to report
the case. 1t was urged by some that
if doctors consistently disclosed the
condition in such cases 1T would
merely mean that they would not
be consulted. The ailment would
be concealed, and the doctor would
lose the chance of treating the case
properly and using the moral in
fluence to get the patient to disclose
his condition. The moral Of the
whole case was that employees in
important positions should be fire.
quently examined by doctor repre-
senting the company.
The less serious problem arises
ought a doctor to disclose the con-
dition of an employee to an en-
ployer where there is no public
danger involved? An employee, for
instance, may be i'll or incapacitated
through drink. Here the doctor
must be guided entirely by the pa
TENTS consent and should, even at
the risk of offending the employer,
keep his patients secret. In Eng
land the law is indefinite on the
point, and the unfortunate medical
man may be held guilty of contempt
of court if he refuses to answer
questions in the witness box, or if
he does so he may have an action
for damages brought against him by
the patient.
In 1896 the Royal College Of
Physicians took the opinion of emf
nent counsel-Sir Edward Clarke
and Mr.. Horace Avory-on the
question of professional secrecy,
and their view was that a doctor
should not reveal facts which had
come to his knowledge in the course
Of his professional duties even where
there was suspicion of a criminal
offense having been committed.
Mr.. Justice Hawkins (afterward
Lord Brampton), however, held that
in very serious cases, involving the
screening of criminals, it was the
duty of medical men to speak out
London Mail.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Sens In Verse
The COST OF LIVING.

T Owe Is the cost Of living. Pay It and
- go your way.
Love is the cost of the bloomy place of
rest at the end of day.
Love is the cost Of living. Beggar and
thief and king
Pay 1t for life that Is all Of life, the true
and the only thing.
T Owe is the cost of living. Tho green
- grit hills are thine,
The low, sweet vale with the bird and
bloom. tho bough and the tangled
vine;
The murmur Of many waters, the cool of
the calm, grave wood,
The wide domain Of the simple fields,
with their noble and quiet good.
T Owe is the cost of living, and only
~ loves service can buy
TIE day by day of the tender way that
leads to starry sky;
That leads TO the toll at morning and
home to the sweet, sweet night
With dream and rest on a faithful breast
till the rose dawn blooms In light
Unidentified.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Served as coffee. the new coffee sub
stitute known to grocers everywhere
as DR.. Shops Health Coffee, will trick
even coffee expert. Not a grain OF
real coffee in 1t either Pure healthful
toasted grains, malt, nuts, ETC.. have
been SO cleverly blended as to give a
wonderfully satisfying coffee taste and
favor. And it is made in q minute, "
too. No tedious % minutes boiling.
At all Dealers.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
IL Was a Booby Prize.

A woman fell from ferryboat
crossing over to Camden, and a
poor Irishman sprang over and res
cued her. When she was safely
landed on the deck her husband,
who had been calm spectator OF
the accident, handed the brave fell
low quarter.
Some of the bystanders express
ing their Indignation, Pat SAID
"Arrah, don't blame the gentleman
he knows best. Perhaps if |
hadn't saved her he'd have given
me a dollar -Philadelphia Ledger
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

August time, tells of the nerves. But
that spiritless, no ambition feeling can
be easily and quickly altered by taking
what is known by druggists every
where as DR.. Shops Restorative
Within 4S hours after beginning to use
the Restorative, improvement VIII De
noticed. OF course, full health Will not
Immediately return. The gain, how
ever. will surely follow. AND best OF
all. YOU will realize and feel your
strength and ambition as it is return
ing. Outside influences depress hrsS
the "inside nerves" then the stomach,
Heart and Kidneys will usually fall
Strengthen these failing nerves with Dr.
Shops Restorative ana see how quick
" health will be yours again. Sold by
Gorrells Drug Store.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Pain anywhere stopped in 20 min
utes sure with one of DR.. Shops PINK
Pain Tablets. The formula is on the
25-cent box. Ask your doctor or drug
gist about this formula Stops woman
" pains, headache, pains anywhere.
Write Dir. Shoop, Racine, Wis, for Tree
trial, to = yove value Of his Headache,or
Pink Pain Tablets, Sold by GorrelPs
Druc Store
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

When the Stomach, Heart or Kid
new nerves get weak, then these organs
al ways fail. Don't drug the Stomash, nor
stimulate the Heart or Kidneys. Ihat
is simply a make-shift. Get a PIE
scrlption known to druggists everywhere
as DR.. Shops Restorative. The Res
torative is prepared expressly for these
weak inside nerves. Strengthen these
nerves. build them up with DIR. Shops
Observation-Disclosures or liquid-and see
how quickly help will come. Sold by
Gorrell's Drug Store.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Fraternal Orders.

Kockbl ldge Lodge, No. So. l. y. 0. f.
meets every Thursday night, at Odd Fell
lows Hall.
Lexington Lodge, No. &c, K, of P:
meets every Tuesday night, at Odd Eel
liberty Lodge, No, 2, Daughters o
Rebeka6, meets every Monday night'a
Odd Fellows Hall.
Mountain City Lodge, No. 81, Ancient
York Masons, meets lst ana ora Moi
day nights at Masonic Hall
Natural Bridge Council, No.l92O koyal
Arcanum, meets list and 5rd WEDNESDAY
nights in each month, at Odd Fellows
Hall.
Lex. Council, No. 179, Junior Order
United American Mechanics, meets every
Friday night at Odd Fellows Hall.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Three years ago there were some
thing like 10000 Chinese students IN
Toxic. Now there are only some 4,5OV:
Several schools where they were taught
are empty, and there are few II any
Chinese now attending the military
college funded by General Fukushlma'
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Weak Imen should read my"Book
No. 4 for Women" 1t tells OF DR..
Shops Nigh + Cure. Tells now theS ines
soothing, hfaling, antiseptic supposl-
tories, bring quick and certain help'
The Book is free. Address DR.. Shoop,
Racine. Wis. Gorrell's Drug Store.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
Cures Blood and Skin Diseases
Eczema, Greatest Blood Puri-
fier Free

II your blood is impure, thin, diseased,
hot or full of humors. il you have blood
poison, cancer, carbunkles. eating
sores. scrofula, eczema, itching, rising
ard bumps, swellings OF superating
sores, scabby, pimply skin, ulcers bone
pains. catarrh. rheumatism, or any
blood or skin disease. take Botanic
Blood Balm (B. B. b. Soon all sores
heal, aches al pains stop and the
Blood is made pure and rich. Drug
glsts or by express 81 pei large bottle.
Sample free Dy writing Blood Balm Co..
Atlanta, Ga. B. b. B. is especially ad.
vised for chronic, deep-seated cases OF
blood or skin diseases, as it cures after
all else fails. NOV ~ O'-l'Fr
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Paraguay has an agreeable and
healthful climate, not vii hs tan z
about six months Of very hot weather,
and the health of its people is better
ON an average than that OF the inhabi-
tants of the coast countries,
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

One OF the effects OF the German old
age pension scheme Is rather peculiar,
The pension is forfeited If the workman
does not work AZ or 40 weeks out OF the
80 on an average, and this provision
has been a deterrent TO strikes.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Prof. George E. Palmer OF Harvard
University, in recent lecture, SAID IN
substance: 1.-THE scientific world swung
TO Darwinsm and then swung back;
the religious world swung oyer 10 the
scientific position, and is swinging
ack -
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

IN the Slavonic section of the new
York public library there are S.0Z' VOL
umes and very large proportion Vi
the Russian readers select books On So
cial and governmental subjects.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

During 1907 the Chinese government
spent nearly 100000 for students
studying in foreign countries. japan
got nearly half the money ana Tue
United States about one-fourth,
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Look out for hot days-Cholera In
fahtum. Don't worry use Dr. rahr
ney's Teething Syrup. 25c. sample Tree
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

The earnings Of India railways dur
ing the fiscal year, April TO March 81.
t907.O8, were $l55. 200, compared
with 1929 ,033 900 last year.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
TRIPLES,

THEY that wander at will where thu
l. works OF the Lord are revealed
Little guess what Joy can be got from
cowslip out Of the field.
Lord Tennyson.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

A Bombay firm proposes to start
factory In Kashmir for the manuiact-
ure Of nitrate of calcium az o manure
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

Hot weather. Little clothing. Plenty
of water inside and out. DR.. F'ahrney, s
Teething Syrup. Babies don't get sick.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

% k issnes certificates of Deposit Payable demandthe
TO hear interest at the rate of three @ per cent per annu
from their date provided the remains sixty Tow oasS
longer
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05

A Guaranteed Cure for Piles
Itching. Blind, Bleeding, Protrudipg
Piles. Druggists are authorized to re-
fund money II PAZ0 OINTMENT
tails W cure IN . 80 ID days. 500.
Lexington gazette. [volume] (Lexington, Va.) 1871-1962, 1908-08-05
FIRST NATIONAL BANK
OF LEXINGTON, VIRGINIA e
Statement of Condition at Close of Business June 300o

- RESOURCES -
Loans and Investments, 49, 1925 O70'ol
Banking House, &c......... 36,356.lS
Treas'r U. S.S5 pr.ct FUND.- 625.OO
Other Real Estate. ...... 100000
Cash on hand. -. $2S, 1896
Due from Banks. 9,342.6l T,525.67
S54O, 5s8. GO
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-02-20
MRS. ELIZABETH KENDALL.

Died-At her residence, Ironton,
Mo-, on Sunday, February IS, 1908,
at 400 O'Clock A. M, Elizabeth
Kendall, relict of the late Charles
Kendall, aged 50 years, 4 months
and 6 days.
Deceased was born in Berlin,
Germany, where her parents re-
sided until she was fourteen years
of age, when the family came to
America. They located at Iron
Mountain, and there in 1857 Eliza
beth was united in marriage to
Charles Kendall. To them eight
children-fve sons and three
daughters-were born. Of these,
Conrad, David, Henry and VIM.
r. and Mrs. HI. N. Baird and Mrs.
G. j. Tual, survive to mourn a
mothers loss.
Shortly after the breaking out of
the civil war, they removed to
Ironton, and this has been their
home for nearly fifty years. The
father died in 1888, leaving the
care of the family to the mother
even then an invalid. She bore
her burdens as only a Christian
mother can, and reared her child
rem to a manhood and woman
hood commanding the esteem and
respect of all who know them. lido
not know what better thing can be
said in her behalf, or how to pen
a higher tribute to her memory
than this. Self-sacriicing and
patientin long continued suffering,
she bore her cross meekly and
submissively to the end. And now
she rests in peace! TITS this
thought that lightens the sorrow o.
those nearest and dearest to the
departed one, as the bow of prom
Use illumines and dissolves the
blackness of the storm-cloud.
The funeral was held at the fam
lily residence at 2:30 o'clock Tues
day afternoon, Rev. DR.. Stitt con-
Quoting the service. Then the
body, attended by many neigh
bors and friends, was conveyed tt
the Masonic cemetery and there
laid to rest beside the remains O
those dear ones who had preceded
her into the realms of the Grea'
Unknown.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-02-20
From DR.. ZwaPt.

KANSAS CITY, Mo-, Feb. 6, 1908.
My Dear Mr.. Ake-For twenty
seven years the REGISTER has
been to me a messenger from
home, and | don't want an in
iquitous law to deprive me of it..
Things have come to a pretty
pass when a man cannot have his
paper without paying for it!
| fear it may have q detergent
action on editors, men who are
philanthropists, else they could
not give SO much news, paper and
ink for the money. To compel
such men to have regard for mon
ey is a crime, for when their COT
fers are filled their wits are be-
numbed and their influence to So
ciety correspondingly lessened.
/ forward mine-under protest
for l dislike to aid in crime.
The millennium is at hand.
When T you going to redeem
your promise to visit me? Lett
be this spring or fall. Wallace is
on the bench and you'll have to
be good, and, if bad, he'll be too
busy to notice you since he is so
occupied in watching men who
sell cigars on Sunday. Well al
low you to have gum and all-day
suckers, however. Really, | believe
you would enjoy a visit. Oul
bouleyards are unsurpassed and
will be a revelation to you.
Kindly remember me to the Whit
worths, Delanos, Fairchilds, Lo-
PEI, Bishops, Dingers, Roehrys,
Rieke and Edgar, and hosts Of
others to whom I am indebted
for many kindnesses in the long
ago.
May the REGISTER flourish ano
may it's editor ever be as genial as
when I searched the sweepings
for type.
Sincerely,
B. HI. ZwART.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-02-20
To The County Court.

All honor to our noble County Court!
Its action savors of a good report:
Though one shows plainly by the course he
takes
The Giraffe" favors and his Lord forsakes.
The principle he would ingratiate
Will influence a soul! And what its fate?
If by his act tits to destruction led,
The blood will surely rest upon his head.
Thou art thy brothers. keeper! Upon thee
Has God placed this responsibility,
And if to him a stumbling block thou'stfound
| His blood will cry for vengeance from the
ground.
If not thy brothers. keeper tell me why
That Jesus left His glittering throne on high?
And why he drank the agonizing cup?
And for sin-fallen man was lifted upp
Symbolic offerings since the world began
Foretold the sufferings of the Son of Man.
That from His side would flow a crimson
flood
That we might find redemption through His
blood.
And in His Gospel He doth plainly say:
Go seek the lost ones that have gone astray
And point them to the precious Lamb Of God
And follow in the pathway | have trodl
And this | say land say it to my shame):
That Like you ,have been SO much to blame
Still let us strive, before our race is run,
To rectify the mischief we have done.
Take warning ere too late! My friend, be-
ware
Lest you, too, fall in the fatal snare!
Let not this subtle poison mar your view
And in its deadly clutch envelop you,
You make of many things a great ado,
Especially about the revenue;
Now you cannot deny the "stubborn facts:
lie uho drinks Liquor, pays NE License Tar
w. c. JOHNSON.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1908-02-20
From Graniteville.

A. ]. Sheahan spent a few days
last week in st. Louis.
Mrs. Arthur Tolleson has re-
turned to her home in St. Louis
after spending a few days with
relatives and friends at this place.
Quite a few of our towns people
are sick with La Grippe.
Rev. w. R. Nc. Cormack, P. E.,
delivered an excellent sermon al
this place Sunday night.
Mrs. Jno. Simpson, of Arcadia,
visited in Graniteville last week.
Mr.. Marion Treadway moved
his family from Des Arc to this
place, Tuesday Of last week.
Mrs. M. Houk is sick with bill
lious remitting fever. We hope
for her speedy recovery.
Mrs. Alex Smith and son, Ro-
bert, of st. Louis, spent last week
with friends and relatives at this
place.
Mr.. B. Woods, of Elvins, is Wis
iting his brother, Mr.. Jonn Woods.
of this place, who has been sick
for some time with La Grippe but
is some better at this writing.
We understand that Scott Bree-
man, who was sent to a hospital
in st. Louis, a short time ago, fol
an abscess in the side, is improv-
ing rapidly, and will be able to be
at homo in a short time.
Harry Hall returned home from
st. Louis, Saturday.
Died at his home in Granite
vile, Mo-, on Wednesday, jan
uary 20, 1908, little Everette Whit
ney, son of Mr.. and Mrs. James
Whitney. OF La Grippe, aged {
years, 7 months, and 16 days.
His funeral services were conduct
ed by Mr.. Chas L. Ferguson.
He was laid to rest in the cemetery
at Middlebrook.
A precious one from us is gone,
A voice we loved is stilled;
A place is vacant in our home,
Which never can be filled.
Feb'y 9, 1908. GRANITE.