davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
ADE AND THE PRESS AGENT.
The Time when the Humorist Held
Down n Desk

From LpIinCutt'N
While George Ade was conducting a
dramatic column On a Chicago newspaper
the press agent OF a coming theatrical at
traction walked brisSly into AIDES Office
one morning and offered the author a
long article which was primarily an ad-
VeTtisenent for the coming show.
"Ade. / want you 90 use this story
FOR me- said the theatrical man. It's
a good, Interesting article. and you'll do
me great favor by printing It.
I'm sorry. but its not the sort of
stuff the paper wants replied Ade- It's
too much % an advertisement Why.
if you took -',~t down 70 our business
Office. they'd charge you regular ad-
vertisinE rates.
The press agent moUrnfuUy departea
but the next morning Ade looked through
the paper and was astonished TO ma
the agents story occupying a fun col
umn ON the editorial page Later I'm the
day the managing editor came into AIDES
Office and spreaG out The editorial psEa-
That's the sort Of theatrical STUFF We
want De said- pointing 70 the agents
article. And what do you think. Ade7
! only paid SO for that story"
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
We Are Seven.

The tally is complete. The political
conventions have done their work. well or
Ill, as the case may be. and the net -e-
suit is that If voter cant find some
platform or candidate TO suit his fastidi-
Gus taste he must be hard 10 please in
deed There are two Williams in the
field. two Thomsses. two Eugenes and
one Martin-seven in all Here they are
Republican. William H Taft: Democratic
William J. Bryan; Peoples Party. Thorn
as E Watson; Socialist. Eugene Y. .Debz:
Prohibition Eugene W Chain: Socialist
Labor. Martin r Preston. and Inde-
Pendence League. Thomas l. TIisgen
Surely We are rich this year in candi-
dates. though the voter who has 10 choose
between their conflicting claims may re-
gard seven tickets. seven candidates.
seven declarations of principles. and
seven choices as an embarrassment Of
riches The situation is not unprece-
dented- for in 800 there were eight
'Richmonds in the aeld,-' and four years
ago there were SIX IF one considers the
ends and aims Of the minor parties in The
field it viii be seen. we think. that these
more nearly approach what has come 10
be regarded in later years as the ideals Of
the Democrats; and so fl may not be far
fetched TO infer that such support as they
obtain VIII be drawn more from that which
really belongs 10 Mr. Bryan thar from
the Republican party
It may be taken. too we think. that
the mere fact OF this multiplicity of psr-
lies argues that on the whole all Of the
parties are reaching closer and closer N
what may be regarded as the nations ideal |
In other words. that there are al the pre4-
ent day no great. burning. vital issues thar
cry for solution and for which one ps-1v
stands before the other. The differences
Of opinion are all minor differences. and |
the platforms OF the strong parties. Old 1
established are so akin that the members
OF these smaller political denominations
feel no doubt that they may safely leave
the main issues with them while thew
plump their votes for minor principles.
The strange increase Of parties and can
didates reminds one. somehow. OF that
poem OF LongfeTo7 in which the cbu5
insisted that We Are Seven" She was
alone; her brothers and sisters were IN
the graveyard laid" but she stiH insisted
that I'VE are seven" It might be said. II
IT did not have a humorous twist sbo,7,
II. that after the votes are counted
the successful candidate, thinking OF his
rivals in this seDtaugular fight. viii hard
y be able TO evoke a sigh OF commits
Grafton for the six OF them who have 70
be in the (politicaD graveyard laid"
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
A REVOLUTIONARY IMMATURE.

Wen gentlemen n blue and bz7F
IRON 1c1Feled boxes rock their s-uF
WIN brush of friu and fick of ne
And bows most stately.
l I'm them must this winsuue maid
Nhuse eyes have celestial sasde
IN satin Or in foEercd brocade.
Have smiled sedatoly.
Within her hair there hides hsue
% scld new-fashioned from TIE mirt.
Her curved liTs wear ve-meil tint;
Her ear is tiny:
Her cleeks hsTe Just tire crimson GLOW
That hale October loves 20 show
Ere flies The earlies. fakes Of znor
And airs are why
Romance III Earhors n her facs
Her throat hah hid IN SNOWY lace.
Her head poised with patrician gr7cs.
Her whole air srriehtiy.
No doubt TIE fsn within her hand
Was far more Potent 70 Command
Than am dreaded wizari's wand
Though brandished brightly.
Can one net fancy how she trod
The uiuucte Her TFhtest nod
Making gallant feel a sd
Al least a uinute.
OF ril she gave her diinty Glove
Jnid a rival swain IN love:
Then knew the arst the sting Thereof
The bitter IN e.
Divine. albeit haf dcmue.
The maiden Of this miniature
Upon ones heart WORKS such a lure
That time secms cruel-
o n have lived benezfh the E1n
That her adore-s locked uponl
. 70 have wooedi . to bare won
And HuT1 tbs 5erel.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
TO SUBSCRIBERS.

That vacation OF yours viii be
taeOmpiefe unless The washing
ton Herrld follows you
Il will be Ike a daily letter
from home.
wherever you are, Il will reach
you regularly. and the address
VIII be changed ~ often as de-
sired
Please be particular to state IN
each ense the length of time Won
desire paper sent TO new address.
Daily, 30 cents a months daIIy
and sunday so cents. Postage
prepaid.
Telephone Main Sssa.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

II the Vice President felt inclined 70
take a cocktail with his royal highness
OF Wales, he was certainly able 10 do il
with a fine disregard Of consequences as
70 others political standing.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

A contemporary says the Sultan OF
Turkey is "a very discreet monarch. +"
To say the least Of it. like Davy Crock
ett's coon, the Sultan knows when to
climb down.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The London Times recently referred to
Mr. Fairbanks as Vice Admiral Sure
y it is up 70 US TO return the compliment
BY referring TO Prince George as col
Wales"
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

An Ohio man survived three strokes
OF lightning" says the Atlanta Georgian.
Doubtless it was political lightning; that
never knocks out a true Ohioan.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The mint-julep, breeze-fanned South
invites the North to spend the summer
with her, says the AdairsvfHs GA
Banner The trouble is, so much Of tile
South isn't mint-juIeped any more.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Mr. John Kendrick Bangs is thinking
seriously Of being a candidate for gov
ernor Of Maine, 50 he announces. This IS
one Of the few real jokes Mr.. Bangs ever
perpetrated
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Mr. Johnson. Of Minnesota, viii do his
best 20 carry his home State for Mr..
Bryan This viii be quite Disappointing
70 number Of people professedly very
loyal to Mr.. Johnson's style Of Democ-
racy but a short time ago.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

A physician recommends the silence
cure for nervousness Il would help
eYerybody's nervousness II some people
would take the silence cure.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Won't somebody give % cents TO the
Bryan campaign fund.- asks the New
York Tribune. We suspect the Tribune
really hopes somebody viii give it a
lemon.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

M Taft's speech Of acceptance only
refers to Mr.. Roosevelt some .utventy
times. SO it was pretty well edited. after
all. We suspect.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

A spiritualist says she IS doomed to
walk from town TO town until she has
visited every place Of Importance in the
country" Evidently she intends to be
sort Of circulating medium.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

An expert says the coal supply viii last
Z'e9 years The average man viii be
satisfied for the time being II he can feel
assured HIS supply VIII last through the
coming winter
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Snyder. the catsUp king is being
sued for divorce OF course. the inevitable
conclusion is. It IS a spicy affair.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The Car Of Russia viii visit England
soon It must make one very nervous
to have kinfoIks like the Gar visiting
in the house.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

nursing bottle That isn't exactly the
kind OF bottle that usually knocks out
gentry o. his persuasion
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

A publication named Common Sense"
has been started in Charleston. s. c. It
VIII probably Ill a iong-felt want there
about
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The Prohibition Presidential candidate
says he viii call out the navy. # neces-
sary to enforce prohibition, IN case he is
elected The water wagon would serve
his purpose better. We think.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
A LITTLE NONSENSE.
THE TESTERS sTAND-BY.

THE TESTERS standby.
Maud Muller on q summers day
stood in the meadow ralxing hay.
We should be glad
She did not gad.
But was content at work TO stay.
FOR II sweet Maud had been a shirk,
and not inclined TO stick TO work.
We would have lost.
Unto our cost.
A Theme on which TO quip and quirk.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Who ever thought the Standard Oil
Company would ever pay thar fine. any
way asks the Los Angeles Express.
evidently determined 20 ask something
nobody can answer
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

It is too hot TO SIM says a BirmiuE-
nam minister Stin, it VIII be hotter still
for people who fail to cut it out. won't
il?
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The Sick Man of Europe must be in
bad way. sure enough. II he has reached
the point where he IS willing 70 discuss
his constitution
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

To Frank L Seeiy. Of Atlanta. is due
the credit for kicking the lid on the
convict-lesse business in Georgia The
consequent stencil. however. is all but
sitting.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

An article labeled coffin va-nish-' Is be-
ing advertised in certain dry territory
down Dixieway. We presume this is be
cause OF the pure food law requirements
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Mr. Roosevelt is 10 get 81 a word for
those hunting stories short and ugilers.
along with the rest OF them. we suppose.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Robert FItzsimmons. erstwhTle cham
pion heavyweight prize fighter of the
world, was recently knocked cut By a
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

a Mrs Hay IS said TO be the champion
poker player Of the world. We presume
Mrs Hay always has large. fine stack
in front OF her.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Speaking OF the eternal fitness Of things
Mr. John Temple Graves was nominated
for Vice President by the Independence
Party, assembled in convention in Or
cheStra Hall
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

And GrandoIdtexas, too. stands pat on
local option" The drought down South
seems confined TO a rather limited area.
after all
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

sweet little Washington girI recently
gave a whooping-cough party. Out in
Texas. the only thing ike that the pop
Ulation ever enjoys is a cough-up party.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

SIN, if we had the biggest navy in the
world We have no doubt Castro would
keep up the sqUabhle, all the same.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Wonder what Miss Ida TarbeU thinks
Of that S292aa600 that never. came.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Mr. Bryan blue-pencHs his own copy.
anyhow.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Newspaper Men In Demand.
Fraza the aierideH Jou-usl
Bioated boudhoIders and corporations
are 10 be succeeded as chief factors IN
the Sazsl-S zzs-s,icai campaign By news
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

We would have lost.
Unto our cost.
A theme on which to quip and quirk.
Accumulated Work.
Tremendous cliff. that"
Seems TO fascinate you
Yes; that's about the way my desk
VIII look when I get back"
A scheme.
Say, old man"
What Is it2-
Would you rather listen TO a bunch
OF funny stories or loan me $. ?"
He got the s.
BY No Means.
I understand Bryan's favorite song is
La Paloma'
Well the La Paloma' vote is not to
be sneezed at"
For One Thousand Acres.
When folks complain
OF lack Of rain.
The city man
OFT wonders why
They do not try
A sprinkling can.
Speedy Times.
Another romance ended.
They drifted apartg''
No they chugged apart. People don't
drift In these rapid times"
Pruning the Conversation.
would suggest that we have an un-
derstanding. said the enthusiast as they
sat down TO whist.
AS 10 what?r
Let Us stick strictly to cards between
anecdotes
A Road Accident.
we lost a wheel
How'd you get homer"
'One Of the girls let US substitute her
Merry Widow hat
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

The New York Journal Of Commerce
thinks the matter Of the speech is admir-
able. but that it would De better had il
been less labored. It thinks that perhaps
Mr.. Taft had too much advice and took
too much counsel Il says:
Tt does not read Ike a speech. hut Ike
a labOrious and carefully prepared docu-
ment. and it lacks the spirit and 90.
that we would like to find in a proiDc-
ton Of the kind There IS evidence Of
constraint which hampered the freedom
OF the speakers. or rather the writer's
utterance and makes him appear to be
painfully working out a programme not
altogether his own. He seems TO bs,-s
been working under TOO much counsel
and advice and in pursuance OF too
many suggestions. We feel that Il ne
had cut loose and expressed himself in
an easy and natural way. he would have
made a much better impression
The New Haven Register does not see
many traces Of editing on the speech. It
SAYS
The trail OF the blue pencil is not
plain on Mr. TafTs address Of accent
ance- He had certain things to say. ana
he took such space as he needed in saw
ing them In this. as IN other respects
MS address is courageous And though #
viii take somewhat over an hour the
man who would be informed on certain
prominent issues Of the campaign as
interpreted In the light Of the Republican
candidates position. viii do well to read
the address deliberately Fer IL is clear
lodlcisi and concise, in spite Of its
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02
Pruning the Conversntion.
A Rond ACCIDENT.

4 Hoad Accident.
We lost a wheel"
How'd you get homer"
One Of the girls let US substitute her
Merry Widow hat
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

SUNDAY. AUGUST ?. los.
The Washington herald., 1908-08-02

Another romance ended
They drifted apart
No they chugged apart. People don't
drift IN these rapid times"
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23
Forfeiture Notice

To Martin Wolfred, his heirs, executors,
administrators, and to whom it may
concern:
You are hereby notified that we, Peter
Ericsson, Charles Erickson, Peter Nelson
and Charles Grant, co-owners, have ex-
pended during the year 1907, the aggre-
gate sum of four hundred $4,000 dollars
in performing labor and making inn
provements ON the Maud S., Knob Hill,
Golden Gate and Silver Bell mining
claims, all situated in the Walker Lake
Mining District, county of Esmeralda,
State of Nevada, and forming a contigu-
Gus group, certificates of location of
each OF which said claims are recorded
with the Mining District Recorder of
said mining district and with the County
Recorder of said Esmeral1a county, and
that the sum of one hundred (S100) dol
lars was so expended by us upon each
of the four said claims, said expendi-
lures having been made for the purpose
of holding said claims and each of them
under the provisions of Section 1924 of
the Revised Statutes of the United
States, and being the amount required
to hold said claims and each of them for
the year ending December 81 1907.
This notice will DE published once a
week for ninety days and if, at the ex-
piration of ninety days after such notice
by publication is given, you should fail
or refuse to contribute the sum of twenty
$50 dollars for and on account of each
of said four claims, the same being your
proportion of the 500 so expended by
us on each of said claims your interest
i'll each of said claims upon which you
so fail or refuse to contribute said sum
of $50 shall become the property of the
undersigned said co-owners under said
Section 1924 aforesaid.
PETER ERICSSON,
CHARLES ERICKSON,
PETER NELSON,
CHARLES GRANT.
Date of first publication, Feb. p, 1908.
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23
SUM Nj on s

In the District Court of the First Ju-
dicial District of the State of Nevada,
county of Lyon.
Action brought in the District Court of
the First Judicial District of the State of
Nevada, Lyon county, and the complaint
filed in said county i'll the Office of the
clerk of said District Court on the
9th dav of March, A. D. 1908.
Mary p Smith, plaintiff, VS.. John Ec-
cles Smith, defendant.
The State of Nevada sends greeting to
John Eccles Smith, defendant.
You are hereby required to appear in
an action brought against you by the
above named plaintiff i'll the District
Court of the First Judicial District of the
State of Nevada, Lyon county, and an
swer complaint filed therein within ten
DAYS Exclusive of the day of service)
after the service on YOU of this summons,
if served in said county, or if served out
of said county, but within the district,
twenty days; in all other cases forty
DAYS, or judgment by default will be
taken against you according to the PRAYER
of said complaint
The said action is brought to obtain a
Judgment and decree dissolving the
bonds of matrimonv now and heretofore
existing between the plaintiff and de
PENDANT herein, because of your willful
and continued desertion of said plaintiff
for more than one year, as will more
fully appear from the verified complaint
on file'herein, TO which reference is here
made. And you are hereby notified that
if you fail to answer the complaint the
said plaintiff will take Judgment against
you according to the prayer of said COM
plant
Given under my hand and the seal OF
the District Court of the First Judicial
District of the State of Nevada, Lyon
county this 9th day of March, in the
year of our Lord one thousand nine
hundred and eight.
Seal ID. w. MELARKEY, Clerk.
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23
Yeripgton Public
School News Notes
BY KATHLEEN HIRoNYMous

Our classmates, who have been visit
ing the feet, have returned to school
again.
The election for school trustees will
be held at the school house May Is The
polls will be open from to p NJ
There were four applicants for the
State examinations held at this place.
The returns will not be known until near
the close of the term
The school sends cordial invitation
to all schools now in session in the val
ley, also to those not in session, if pos
sible, to come as a school and be pre-
pared to give at least one number on the
program.
Our library now contains 128 pamphlet
form books, a set of Is volumes of Stot :
dard's Lectures, 9 volumes of 'Jigzag
Journeys the World Over. " as books for
general reading, 9 volumes of The
Three Nassar Girls" makinng total of
204 books.
The school had grand treat on We'd
nesday afternoon. DIR. Beatty visited
the school and gave the two rooms a
talk about the fleet and facts about bat
tleships. He began by telling his trou-
bles in trying to witness the feet from
Goat Island and how he escaped to the
hills, i'll good view of the bay, when, at
the time for the fleets arrival, the fog
settled in such manner he was unable
to see from his place. He gave us an
excellent mind picture of the incoming
of the fleet and maneuvers, and gave us
many good ideas as to how battleships
are constructed, the several different
kinds of ships and uses of each. Al
though many of us did not get to see the
fleet, we heartily enjoyed Dr. Beatty S
pleasant talk.
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23
Make This a Day

Make this a day; there is no gain
In brooding over days to come;
The message OF today is plain,
The futures lips are ever dumb.
The work OIL yesterday is gone
For good or i'll let come what may;
But now we face another dawn:
Make this day.
Though yesterday we failed to see
The urging hand and earnest face
That men call opportunity.
We failed to know the time or place
For some great deed, what need to freta
The dawn comes up silver gray;
The golden moments must be met:
Make this day
This day is yours; your work IS yours
The odds are not who pays your hire;
The thing accomplish d-that endures,
1t 1t be what the days require
He who takes up his daily round.
Asone new armored for the fray,
Tomorrow steps on solid ground
Make this day.
The railsmai
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23
NOTICE OF RESTORATION OF PUBLIC
LANDS TO SETTLEMENT AND
ENTRY.
Department OF the Interior,
General Land Office.
Washington. ID. c., May 6. zoos.

Notice is hereby given that the Secretary OF
the Interior has vacated departmental order of
withdrawal in far the same affects the
withdrawal for irrigation purposes under the
Act OF June II. 1922, ga Stat, 3sS,l for use i'll
connection with the Walker River Project, New
Cal. of the following described lands in the
state of Nevada and by his authority such of
said tracts as have not been heretofore finally re-
stored and are not otherwise withdrawn. reserved
or appropriated. will be subject to settlement
under the public land laws OF the United States
and after August 4, 1905, but shall not be sub
ect to entry filing. selection until September
), 1905 at the United states Land Office at Car
son City Nevada, warning being expressly given
that no person will be permitted to gain es
ercise any right whatever under any settlement
or occupation begun after May 5. 1905 and prior
to August d. 1905 all such settlement or occu
patton being forbidden:
Mt Diablo Principal Meridian 7. IL N. K. 16
f., S. y n. W. u, W. y N. f. 5. L. y N. +. u
and N e. Il SEC. ~, and w. u ). w. 4 sec. s..
FRED BENNETT,
Commissioner of the General Land Once.
FRANK PIERCE.
First Assistant Secretary of the Interior.
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23

Much interest and time is being spent
in preparing the afternoon program for
the school picnic. We make publica-
ton of the interest and good will of our
town merchants in their liberal contri-
buttons in prizes for the various races or
games We cannot publish here the ex-
act races or games or the prizes for each,
but this will be shown on large bulle-
tin board on the grounds that day. In
most cases first and second prize will
be given, the first to take bis choice be-
tween some article mentioned or a prize
in money. The second to take the re-
naming prize. The following shows
what the different firms are doing to
make this success: II. Samuel a boys
purse, harmonica, girls necklace; ]. c.
Gallagher baseball, pair cuff buttons;
Fred Littell jack knife and fine watch;
+. r. Lam, beautiful necklace; F. Burn
er. music roll; Knierim & Son, match
box, perfume; Yerington Drug Co., a
harmonica, box writing paper, perfume,
BASEBALL McDonough & Co., Windsor
tie; Arends & Hansen, handkerchief,
three boxes of candy; Dillon & West, a
boys ball bat and glove. There are
several firms we have not been able to
see up to this date, but shall as soon as
possible. 1t gives us pleasure to know
that our merchants take such a live in
terest in this, as it all means a good
time to young and old, especially the
children. Help us along and bring
everybody to the picnic, Mr.. Clifford
superintendent of the Miller & Lux
ranch, where the picnic is to be held,
says there need be no fears i'll regard to
high water. He is doing all he can to
make the affair success.
PROF. W. +. THURMAN
Yerington times. [volume] (Yerington, Nev.) 1907-1932, 1908-05-23

Practice what you preach; keep the
money at home by patronizing the Times