The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1908-09-09
Mark Twain's Way of Putting 1t.

When one comes across an item Of real
worth to the public, he should at
once make note Of it. For day or
two past, l have been journeying
through Germany with Mark Twain
In his "-ia"p Abroad" He declares,
the pleasure in walking depends
largely upon the company in which
one walks, and the conversation in
du ged In, and then outlines the topics
discussed by him and his friend Har-
ris on their way to Oppenau. He
says: 1--WE discussed everything we
knew, during the first fifteen or twen-
ty minutes that morning, and then
branched out into the glad, free,
boundless realm Of things we were not
certain about. Harris said that il the
best writer In the world once got into
the slovenly habit Of doubling up his
"have's." he could never get rid Of it
while he lived. that is to say. IL a
man gets the habit Of saying II should
have liked to have known more about
It." instead Of saying simply and sem
sibly, II should have liked to know
more about It," that mans disease Is
incurable. Harris said that this sort
OF lapse IL to be found in every copy
Of every newspaper that has ever been
printed In English, and in almost all
Of our books. He said he had observ-
ed In Kickham's Grammar and in Ma
caulay."
What Harris remarks Is true. There
are few errors Of written speech more
common. 1t is found in the produc-
tions Of some Of our most entertain
Ing and best educated writer's, and is
generally the result Of thoughtlessness
and not always Of ignorance. In the
sentence, II should have r':ed to have
known more about It," the time Of the
transaction Is fixed by should
have killed" as belonging 10
the past; why make a second attempt
to fix 1t, or to fix 1t more securely, by
adding ito have known" when "to
know" is all one needs to make the
sentence grammatical and the sense
complete and perspicuous?
I am still slowly Jogging along! with
Mark, and We have come now to
Lucevne in our travels. 1t is the sec.
ond day Of September. the first Of the
fall months. There is a tinge OF cool
ness In the wind that characterizes
fall and not summer. The summer
birds are now flying homeward from
every section Of the country. from
mountains and seashores-all coming
home gladly. and declaring that, one
can be more comfortable at home than
elsewhere. What they say il true. but
we must 60 away from home now and
then In order to get hold of this truth.
We learn some lessons with difficulty,
and these lessons are not worth much
which cost nothing. There are some
good folks in Sumter sitting now with
their legs spread out beneath their
own tables. grumbling at every dish
set before them; and the cure for this
is to spend a month at a boarding
house. This experience will put a
quietus upon all complaints for long
time, be the boarding house good, bad
or Indifferent. Even though the hus-
band may not need 1t. I have an idea
he should be sent away from home
for a month during the summer time
because Of the good that would result
therefrom to his wife. On his return
home. his wife would think him q new
man, or that the growing old fellow
had undergone an experience Of gen.
uine and permanent religion. His con-
tented and uncomplaining manner, hfs
spirit Of general satisfaction would
make II easy to live In the same house
with him. and all would result from
his having spent month In board
ing house. where decency required him
W cav IA ouCuCC WhdS WdS SCS UClOTC
him. and where a row with cook or
housekeeper. IN which he would vent
his spleen, was an impossible thing.
There is no longer any doubt Of the
thing, that summer vacation Is high
ly beneficial to some persons. and
there are others who never take a rest
who surely need lift not for their
own sake, then for the wife's. As a
cure-all for the average male growler.
my advice Is that the wife try to lay
up enough funds during the year to
send him away from home for month
during the summer. At the summer
boarding house he will imbibe lessons
80 salutary and helpful, that for