The Lamar register., 1908-09-09
THE CASE OF
FUSS ELL
Certain Divergent Views Of the
polIcafe
Nv kEnMETT HARRIS

0y KENNETH HARHIo
Policar pressed the button at his
elbow three times. A moment or two
later there was a soft rap at the IL
brary door.
Gomez" called Policar.
The door opened gently and rather
bulky person with decorous side whis-
kers and a white necktie glided in and
stood rigIdly before the master of the
household
did you ring, sir?" asked the
bulky person in an expressionless
voice.
Policar looked at him. The mans
face was almost as expressionless as
his voice. but not quite Polfcar
thought he read thereon calm con-
seriousness OF superiority, thinly dis
guised scorn.
Yes. 1 rang" said the master of the
house at last. 81 want to ask II you
have any reason to be dissatisfied
with your treatment since you have
been here. How about it,"
"Oh. dear. no. SIR" replied Russell.
mo. sir. indeed. have no reason to
complain. Slr.
so far as the establishment IL con-
cerned. you have no criticisms to Of
fer, eh? 1t is conducted upon scale
that meets the requirements OF your
self-respect?"
beg y pardon. sir?"
1.-THE furnishings. for instance. the
draperies. the kitchen equipment and
all that sort of thing; are they good
enough for you? Do you approve of
them? Are they about as tidy and
complete as what you have been &C.
customed tor
Quite so. thank you. sir" replied
RUSSELL.
II hope the rugs don't strike you as
being in bad taste? One or two Of
them are a little bizarre, I know. but
have been assured that they have
rugs Of that sort in the very best
houses.
mot at all, sir. Quite 80. SIR"
"M-m-m," said Policar. Il can't al
low myself to suppose that It's Mrs.
Policar or my daughters. SO fear 1t
must be as Suspected. / must be the
cause of II. Yas afraid 30 from the
first Now, lcok here. Russell. You
must try to make allowances. know
that have many, many SHORTCOMINGS,
but you would overlook them. I'm
sure, II you knew me better. got my
money honestly, RUSSELL; at least I
have always been careful to avoid any
statutory crime. never committed
murder. arson or bigamy. 20 far a. I
am aware. I think could run for .
political Office and not have anything
very startling to COED morals dragged
up out of my past. Please believe
this. Russell. Will you believe itf"
Eyes, sir, certainly. sir" replied the
butler.
"Your words are kind, but fear you
are not yet thoroughly convinced"
said Policar with a sigh. I'VE will let
this pass. then, for the present and
will ask you to crafty little curiosity
that I have. Do you ever indulge in
any form of active amusement? Do
you ever relax at all? How about
roller skatingf"
II have never INDUCED. SIR" ans
wered Russell. mo. sir. Thank you.
SIR"
Then will ask you to be so oblig-
ing as to pick up that package in the
corner and hand 1t to me-" said Poll.
car. "Cut the string. please. Here.
you see, is a pair Of roller skates. I
think they are Just about your size.
Would you mind holding up your foot?
Thanks. Yes, Just the size. Now, I
know that what you need is exercise.
You are getting to be . tribe too thick
1t the waist line and there is a rigidity
about you generally that ought to be
svercome You Just follow me aad
we'll see how these skates work."
About an hour later Mrs. Policar ~
turned. accompanied by her daughters.
She looked at the maid who opened
the door in some surprise.
where's Fussell?" she inquired.
The maid hesitated. II believe he's
tn the dancing room with Mr.. Policar,"
she replied with q slight giggle.
"In the dancing room?" repeated
Mrs. Policar, in amazement. What
A sound like the rumble from .
bowling alley, accompanied by Wig
orous hand-clapping. came from the
little ballroom. Mrs. Policar walked
swiftly down the passage and threw
open the door Just as there followed .
yelp and the thud of q violent concus-
sion. The dignified Russell. his coat
81. his waistcoat split up the back
and his white tie under one ear. was
sitting in a most undignified attitude
In the middle of the floor. Policar was
smoking a cigar and regarding him
with amused approval from 4 seat on
the orchestra stand.
"Doggone it," exclaimed the butler
rThat liked to Jared my teeth out. I
bet my backbone is telescoped. I'll do
It, though, II It takes all summer"
Good boy!" said his master. approx.
ingly. You're coming on fine"
MAY ask what this meansf" in.
quired Mrs. Policar from the door.
Russell started violently and tried
to scramble to his feet, pitching for
ward on his hands and knees in the
EFFORT. Policar got up and. taking his
wife by the arm. led her from the
room, closing the door behind him.
"It's all right, my dear" he chuchled.
Don't be alarmed. I've Just been lin
bering him up little. that's all. I
tbint now that 1 can live in nv own