davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
ETSE llEe7
ySoE4i4&

"What'd Jimmy give yer fer yer
birthday" This here brass ring"
How'd yer know it amt nothin' but
brass?" HE give it ter me. "-Cleve-
land Leader.
Patience-'Is the Russian alpha
bet the same as ours?" Patrice-
Practically; only there are lot
more VS. and KS, l believe "-Yons
kers Statesman.
Your 10" he cried, would give
me the strength to lift mountains!"
Dearest" she murmured, st will
only be necessary for you to raise the
dust Town Topics.
Some flowers are born to blush unseen
:. And waste their sweetness nice.
But some don't even blush at all.
Not even at their price
New York Evening Sun.
Teacher-"What is the total popu-
lation of the globe?"
Small Boy (promptly)-"One and
one-half billions"
Little Girl (raising her handy
'Please. ma'am, we have a new baby
brother in our house. Life.
Tommy-"Pop, what is the differ
ence between a dialogue and a mon
ologue?" Tommy's Pop-"When
two women talk, my son, it's a dia-
logue, but when a woman carries on
conversation with her husband. it's
monologue. philadelphia Rec
ord.
I've heard it said times without no,
II you drink milk and eat cuco
Just before you retire
The two will conspre
10 insure you a sweet, pleasant slo.
Judge.
Reggy-"Bah Jove, told my tall
or I'd like to marry some rich girl
and become interested in settlement
work" Percy-"What did he saw"
Reggy-"He said I'd better get to
work and make a settlement on that
suit l bought two years ago. CHI
cago Daily News.
Mother-"Just run upstairs. Tom
my, and fetch baby's nightgown."
Tommy-"Don't want to-" Mother
oh. well. If your going to be I'M
KIND to your new little sister, she'll
put on her wings and fly back again
to heaven" Tommy-"Then let her
put on her wings and fetch her night
gown!"-Punch.
Investor (angrily)-"See here,
You told me I'd surely clear between
nve and six hundred dollars on that
deal"
Broker-'Well?"
lnvestor-"Well, cleared Just
eight dollars and seventy-five cents
on it."
broker-"Then you've got no kick.
Ihat's between five dollars and six
hundred dollars, isn't it?"
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Southern Illinois "Egypt.r

The year 1924 was very wet
Heavy rains fell frequently. Corn ON
nat lands was total failure. This
year the weevil destroyed the wheat
after 1t was harvested. The NEXT
year, 1925, there was remarkable
growth of thistles on the branch bot
toms. The winter of 1SSO-s1 was
known as the winter of deep snow
me snow was of depth of from
Two and half to three feet on n
level. 1t drifted much and was very
destructive to fruit trees The wealth
er was intensely hot. Both in 1891
and 1892 the early frosts so injured
the corn as to entirely render IT
worthless for almost any purpose
During the years between and in
GLIDING 1S24-32, so nearly CORES.
ponding to the years of famine in the
days Of Pharaoh and his ruler. as he
made Joseph to be, the people OF II.
iinois, dependent upon the southern
part OF the State for so much grain.
particularly corn, that people in re.
membrance of the Bible story began
TO call the part of the State which
mad been so helpful in time of need
Egypt.-Albion Journal.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
A MAN OF LETTERS.

Wien Mr.. Cyrus Watterhouse grew
wealthy from his slaughter-house,
He gave to Shellback College TWEEN thorD.
sand right away.
30 the Faculty rewarded him with honor,
and accorded him
The pedagogic title, Cyrus Watterhouse,
MA"
When he merged his corporation with the
Pressed Beef Combination.
lie consigned a million extra to the Col
- lege; so you see
Grand old Shellbacks Dons of Learning,
tainted money never spurning.
Stretched his name to Cyrus Waiter
house, MA. and PhD."
Next, when Cyrus showed his nature and
bought out a Legislature
For the Sausage Trust, the College got
five millions, title free.
And the Faculty's requital was another
whacking title,
This time, "Watterhouse, BIS, Md.
Ph.D., LID"
Wen, ere Cyrus took to liquor, every time
he made dicker
He endowed the college more and added
on some letters new,
Till his check.boo looked pathetic when
he signed that alphabetic
PDQ."
But at last of honors firing, when poor
Cyrus lay expiring.
On his will he wrote the following. and
settled down to die:
Gents, please don't misunderstood me-
take my coin. but don't YOU hand mo
Any more o that fool Alphabet!
Yours very simply,
Cy."
--Everybody's.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
By Wit of Woman
By BARRY SHIEL.

During the last few weeks he had
contrived to avoid her; although
some of his friends were hers. also.
and there had been plenty of oppor-
tunities of meeting. He could net
bear the thought that his love should
be open to any suspicion or mercen-
airy motives.
And now came the news that she
was to be married! Well, he hoped
the man, whoever he might be, was in
some degree worthy, and that she
might be happy. AS for himself, he
would never be happy again.
Great heavens!"
Frank Reynolds started up from
the breakfast table the following
morning as if he had received an cleo
trio shock. There in the Record, in
unmistakable black and white, was
his name, coupled with that of his
divinity! What villainous practical
joker had played him this trick9
"A marriage is arranged, and will
shortly take place, between Mr.. Fran
els Reynolds, of this town, and Miss
Katherine Gregory, only daughter of
the late James Gregory, of Walms-
ley"
The young man stood motionless.
as If turned to stone. An awful sense
OF shame came over him. and vision
of apologies and unpleasant explana-
lions to be undergone.
What scoundrel has played this
wretched trick on us?" he exclaimed.
when he was able to speak. II must
put stop to it at once. And 1 must
go and see Kitty and apologize to her.
All. If it were only true!"
In a highly perturbed state of
mind the young man choked down the
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
a Stuffed Potatoes.

Select potatoes of even size. cut a
thin slice from one end that they
may stand firm and put in the oven
to bake; when well done, remove
from the oven and with sharp scissors
cut a lid from the upper end and
scoop out the potato into hot bowl
with teaspoon, keeping the skin
whole; beat the potato in the bowl
with little cream, teaspoonful Of
butter, speck of salt and pepper.
then fill the skins with the mixture.
heaping it high on top; set the pota-
toes carefully on end and return to
oven for ten minutes to heat. Serve
on platter with sprigs of parsley
and few tiny specks of butter
Boston Post.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Readr.to.Wear Garments.

That the dressmaker who makes
individual dresses for individual wo-
men will ever disappear entirely is
not likely. but there is no doubt that
she is being pressed harder and hard
er by the ready-to-wear trade. A sta
tistician who had occasion to compile
record on this subject says that the
individual dressmaking trade shows
a falling off of thirty per cent in the
number of persons employed since
1890. BY natural increase. had there
been no disturbing factor, the number
ought to have doubled in this time.
At the same time a tremendous fall
ing off has been noted in the dress
goods departments of retail stores.
the decline in the last three years
having been eighty per cent.
The great variety and cheapness of
the ready-made garments, the surpris-
ing smartness of many of them and
the great convenience of buying the
garment ready made, appeal to an in
creasingly large number of women,
and the manufacturers of such cloth
ing are constantly improving their
stock. both in variety and design. One
manufactures announces. according
to Crerand's Cloak Journal, that for
the fall OF 1908 he has three hundred
models to select from. This means
everything from the simplest jumper
dress up to magnificent creations of
Irish lace and wonderfully wrought
silks, so that If a woman needs a
pretty gown on the instant for any
occasion she has only to telephone for
it.
In one Western town, with a popu-
lation no greater than Yonkers, N.
Y, a merchant advertises that he has
eighty models of women's gowns to
select from for the summer, ranging
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

am sure Of" he said, very earnestly:
and that is, that l love you as well
as ever a woman was loved since the
world began. AS to this" he point
ed to the paragraph-'I should be
scrupulous fool indeed if l did not
now offer to make it true. Kitty
my dear, courageous little kitty
will you be my wife,"
=
When Puggles entered the Office
that morning the assembled clerks
were discussing. amid some excite
ment, the paragraph in the Record.
Its either misprint, or there's
another Francis Reynolds" Baxter
was saying in high tones. why,
he hardly got look in with Kitty
while she was here, and since she left
they've never so much as met"
well, anyhow" observed Greg
son. Ibis lordship will be here pres
emily, l suppose. and then we can
ask him.
Bet you anything you like he
don't turn up at ALL" interpolated
Puggles cocksurely.
'Why?" asked Wilson. What Go
you know, you young mystery mon
ger?"
I've just seen Kitty and Reynolds
walking arm in arm" sard the boy.
The clerks stared incredulously.
Where did you see them?" asked
Wilson.
"On the lawn in front of Kitty's
house. Reynolds had his hat off, and
they were walking like lovers. And
the way they looked at each other"
said Puggles. with provoking en-
phasis.
How did they look?" said Jones.
Puggles sidled toward the door.
Just the way Baxter used to look
at Kitty"
At the same instant that Puggles'
head disappeared an ink-pot smashed
to fragments against the door.
II will really kill that boy one of
these days." Baker announced
From the New York Evening Jour-
nal.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Potato Croouettes.

A delicious way of serving pota-
toes is the following: Boil and mash
twelve medium-sized white potatoes,
using one tablespoonful of butter in
stead of milk. When they are nearly
cold add beaten yolks of three eggs,
one teaspoonful of chopped parsley.
one-quarter teaspoonful of grated
nutmeg and six drops of onion juice
Stir these ingredients together until
they are smooth. Make up into small
cone-shaaed croquettes and stand
away to harden. When they are firm
roll them in the beaten whites of the
eggs and cracker dust and fry in
deep boiling lard until light brown.
This will make twenty-five cro-
quettes.-New York Times.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Women With Two Souls.

AT last science has thrown a great
light upon that deepest of mysteries
the way of a woman. After solv-
ing most of the other riddles of life.
the browning victory of psychothera-
peutics is the discovery that women
have two souls, perhaps more. We
have the word of President G.. Stan
ley Hall. of Clark University, that
there isn't bit of doubt about it, and
it is upon this hypothesis that he ac-
counts for the ''fickleness" of woman
and cher erratic methods of jumping
at conclusions, and her intuition"
Wisely President Hall observes:
woman is much more susceptible
than man. There is good reason for
this. We know that she has two or
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Forgot She Owned an Estate.

The Administer (Devonshire) Board
of Guardians have been assisting a
woman named Olsen, an inmate of
their workhouse, to establish her
claim to an estate in America. which
she is said to have purchased many
years ago and apparently forgotten
all about it until quite recently, when
1t was brought under her notice as
result of inquiries in England as to
her whereabouts. 1t seems that Mrs.
Olsen. who is about sixty years of
age, on arriving in England some
years ago, was in the possession of a
considerable sum of money. This is
stated to have been spent, and the
woman, becoming pauper in an
East Devonshire village. was even
tually taken care of in the union
MISUNDERSTANDING Life.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

protested. You know my meaning
well enough. II it hadn't been for
this money-confound it'd have
tried my luck long ago. AS it is, l
can only apologize to you for my
name being coupled with yours. If
l knew who did it would horsewhip
hint"
Miss Gregory clasped her hands
nervously, and looked at the young
man in somewhat quaint way.
Would your" she said. "Oh,
dear!"
Would you be very sorry for him.
Miss Gregory" asked the young
man sarcastically.
'I-that is" Miss Gregory
broke off, blushed, and then hurriedly
resumed. WELL" she said, 81 sup
pose deserve to be punished. But
horsewhipping- don't think 1
could stand that. Don't you think
lighter punishment would fill the
case?"
Il But, really this is beyond
mel" said Reynolds in bewildered
tone. You can't mean"
Miss Gregory pointed dramatically
to the announcement in the Record.
Exactly" she said, in, rather
faint voice. THE culprit stands be-
fore you. The writer of that para
graph was-myself!"
"You?" gasped Reynolds.
Eyes; I. And now, before you con-
denim me, let me make a clean breast
of it. You see. when l first took up
my employment in the counting
house there were such nice lot of
fellows there that l didn't know
which l liked best.
II tried several of them for while
but soon found out that liked ons
better than all the rest. I felt GER
tain he liked me, too, but he was so
dense and bashful that things didn't
progress so fast as l should have
liked. All the same, I felt pretty
sure of him-that is. until the legacy
came along. Then" She
paused.
eyes, then" prompted Reynolds.
ooh. then it was dreadful. He
avoided me in every possible way. The
rest of the fellows in the Office
seemed anxious to keep my acquain-
lance, but he wouldn't let me come
near him. l saw how it was, and,
/ though l honored him for it, it made
me desperate. l began to see that l
should probably get the proposals of
most of the others, and-and l didn't
want them"
Her voice faltered. please so
away now!" she supplemented quite
vehemently, as the young man made
no sign. I'm sure you must hate
and despise me, T.
She got no further, for at this
juncture the manhood of Mr.. Francis
Reynolds came to his rescue. He
placed one hand gently over her
| mouth, the other clasped her waist.
There is only one thing that
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
E@ FRMZ55 IN
kr.A AAsNFAsHgoMEAl

Jumper frocks are worn by both
young and middle-aged.
The tight and long sleeve is seen
On both coats and gowns.
Chamois gloves are popular for
travelling and everyday wear.
The scarlet and green sunshades
are often worn with white dresses.
The truly fashionable woman
matches her gown with her parasol.
Brown is fashionable and is met
with in all shades and all materials.
The two sides of the newest gown
are not the same. That is, the bodice
The modish short skirt is between
two and three inches above the
ground.
We now not only have Russian de-
signs but Russian colorings, So
called.
Tussor and net is a combination
OF materials much favored at the
present time.
II you are up to date you will speak
of Charlotte caps" not Charlotte
Corday hats"
Puffings and pleats of tulle or silk
aye let into the brims and crowns of
the hats of straw.
AS relief from plain coats with
striped skirts, striped coats with
plain skirts are seen.
Feather trimmings and ostrich. os-
prey and egrets in particular, are
heaped upon dress hats
Be sure your hips are sufficiently
graceful in outline If you desire to
wear one of the new scarfs.
A lovely leghorn from earlier is
swathed in cloud of tulle-faint
pink and yellow and blue and laven-
der.
Cravenetted satin is one of the
more expensive bathing suit ma
terials in favor with those who are
partial to silk.
Although there are stencil patterns
to be had for decorating blouses we
have yet to see waist thus decorated
in actual use.
Is there any prettier trimming for
leghorn straw than pink roses and
well-placed touch of black?
will be draped perhaps on one side
with a part of the border of the ma
terial while the other side will be OF
the plain.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

in price from SO to $50, and the New
York market supplies between $4,000
and $4,000 worth of women's dresses
to one Chicago firm alone. One
manufacturer of women's coats in
New York has expended 100000 on
samples alone. They are not called
samples, to be sure, models being
considered a more elegant term, but
samples they remain. and as such
they will be sold at half the cost of
production before the season is very
old.
Designers of women's dresses in
the big factories of New York receive
from $4,000 to $4,000 year, and
the trade employs $4,000 persons the
year round, and from 10000 to
100000 in the busy seasons. The
sales in women's cloak and suit de-
partments in retail drygoods stores
have increased 100 per cent. in the
last four years-New York Tribune.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
A Strange Profession.

Photography is strange profess
sion," muses. the young man.
Because it develops negatives?"
asks the young woman with a know
ing look.
mot that exactly. But, as an ex-
ample. the other day had my pic
ture taken in my riding togs-not
on horse, you know. but just stand
ing in my riding outfit with my crop
held in my hand. And to-day the
photographer writes me that the pic
lures are ready for me and that they
are all mounted. Herald and Pres
byter.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
SUGGESTIONS FOR The BUSINESS Man.

Don't talk about your competitor
Don't waste valuable details that subor-
dnate handle
Don't walk a mile nickel IL Won yaue yonr
time more than pennies.
Don't shake hands with a if it hurt you.
Don wait for fortune to smile you doesn't
smile all the time When usually favors those
who hustle and not those wait.
Don't show yourself anxious to get an order The
customer Will see it in he will make the
bargain, not you.
Don't allow your clerks to smoke while duty
Don't work all the time. Remember, even machinery
needs
Don't show many different kinds goods at once
Don't be satisfied with you without at
tempting to get The successful follow-up
letters and other means to accomplish this purpose
Don't worry about things that happen. may
De not trials by the time they
Don't be satisfied until bring everything to COM
pete hnish.-Chicago Tribune.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Damson Cheese.

Stew damson plums until tender.
then drain off the juice and remove
the skins and stones. To the pulp
add the juice, weigh it, then boil
until it is dry paste. Stir in six
ounces of sugar to every pound of
fruit and keep stirring until the mix
ture will leave the sides of the kettle
and adhere to the spoon in a solid
mass. If it will yield to the finger
without sticking when touched It is
done. Turn into glasses or china
molds. This is fine for meat or game.
and many prefer it to currant jelly.
New York World.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
y Household ="
( Matters. :
seea+ %s- -sssee
Cocoanut Macaroons.

Add to scant cupful of sifted
-four one cupful of granulated sugar
and two cupfuls of the best shredded
cocoanut. Mix thoroughly, then fold
into the mixture the whites of three
eggs whipped to a stiff froth. Make
into small fiat cakes and bake in a
slow oven until crisp and delicate
brown-New York Telegram.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
The Truth at Last.

motorist was stopped by a DO
iicenlan, the light on the car being
insufficient. He gave his card to the
constable.
q. H. Smith," read the man in
blue. Go on with you'll" he ex-
claimed. Il want your proper nasae
and address. We've too many Smiths
about here. Now look sharp!"
Then" said the motorist, IF you
must have it. it's William Shakes
peare, Stratford-on-Avon."
THANK you, SIR replied the po-
liceman. Sorry to have troubled
YOU" And he carefully entered the
particulars in his book. -Pearson's
Weekly.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

more souls. She may love and hate
at the same time and the same per-
son. She may say and think that she
is sick or well when the reverse is
really true. 1t simply means that one
soul is in the ascendancy. These two
souls may be absolute strangers to
each other, but they certainly exist.
We have proved it beyond the shadow
OF doubt. kansas City Journal.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Women and Leap Year.

Many women have no initiative in
love matters. 1t would never occur
to this type of woman to fall in love
with man until he had first signified
his approval of her, but no sooner
does he declare his affection than she
forthwith blossoms out into devout
lover. Her affection is due merely
to negative reciprocity. Leap year
would be of no use to woman of this
kind. -Gentlewoman.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
gss = IL ,sEN
| 2R2&& 8 s,

among physicians of note. few among
lawyers, and few as executive heads
of colleges or holders of professional
chairs, few among the ranks of edi-
tors. And in the teaching and news
paper fields they have had great op-
portunities, whatever may be the case
to-day.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
Two o'ConncIl ouips.

OF Sir Robert Peel's entire lack OF
sympathy, Daniel O'Connell said:
His smile was like the silver plate
on coffin
Less scathing was the Liberator's
description of woman of similar
repellant temperament: "Slw had ali
the characteristics OF poker except
its occasional warmth
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

TuttiFrutti Pudding.-Remove the pits cupful
of sewed and cut them small pieces
full of stewed and sweeened aprcots through
and cut in small pieces dozen plump
OF one cupfu of which has been added half
teaspoonful of soda dissolved in little water
salt and flour sufficient to make that
Line pudding dish with portion of
fruits in alternate layers until half used dong
with bits of butter and prinklng them lightly -four
Cover with thin layer of
fruit in the first; with
thirty minutes. Serve with preferred sauce
( Ladies' World.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07

The winter through
4 loved her true,
n But tarried;
Till, when the blossoms laughed upon the
boughs,
IN shadow cool
Her milking stool
| carried,
While Gwen went calling, calling home the
COWS.
Then as they ran
Around her can
In riot,
I hooshed them, hooshed them all into the
she'd
With buck and below, black and yellow,
dun and sallow. white and red
On litter good
10 chew the cud
In quiet, e
Then to the milking each in turn be led
H., Alfred
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-08-07
A WELSH MILKING SONG.

The Yellow Creamy 4.
Her touch of silk sfii L rs, a.
Had eased of milk
Each udder;
Yet beating. beating on in wild unrest,
My heart of doubt
A boat without
A rudder- rfia
Still rode the signing billow of my
breast;
Till Gwen, her eyes
With soft surprise
Upturning,
Read all the trouble written in mine
And lucky fellow, lucky fellow. lucky fel.
low that I'd grown
Her pride forsook,
Gave back my look
OF yearning,
Then, brightly blushing, from my arms had
flown
'erceval Graves, in London Athenaeux>,
Baxter Springs news. [volume] (Baxter Springs, Kan.) 1882-1919, 1908-12-03
Truth and
Quality

appeal TO the Well-Iniormed In every
walk Of life and are essential to permanen.
success and crcditable standing. Accor.
ingly, II is not claimed that Syrup Of Fig,
and Elixir Of SIENNA Is the only remedy Of
mowx value, but ono Of many reasons
why u is the best Of personal and family
axatives is the fact that Il clcanses,
,wcetcns and relieves the internal organs
IN which IL acts without any facilitating
after effects and without having to increase
che quantity from time to time.
It acts pleasantly and naturally and
truly as laxative, and its component
parts are known TO and approved by
physicians, as II is free from all objection
able substances. To get its beneficial
effects always purchase the genuine
manufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co., only, and for sale by oil leading drug
Kists.