The Marion daily mirror. (Marion, Ohio) 1892-1912, 1908-08-05

He merely lets MS money talK,
And the applause is always great.
Washington Star.
The cards always go around in a
square deal.
It is not every contractor that can
build q fortune.
Horse Is mans most faithful friend
until man starts to bet on him.
The habit of borrowing money has
destroyed many a good memory
Bessie--"What is food for thought?'
Jossie-"1t is usually light lunch
when a dude is talking"
Franklin-"Wonder If the motormen
on trolley cars ever get an electric
shock?"
Penn-"No; they are non.conductors.
Clare-But. my dear It is secret.
| vowed on my honor never to tell
Marie-welI, I'm listening,-Le
Frou-Frou.
A word to the wise may be SUN.
cient,, but with 300 wives Solomon
must have frequently had a whole
vocabulary thrown at him.
Bils-"were you married by a civil
ceremony
Wills-"Well, If you had heard the
howl the old man was making you
wouldn't have thought So"
Landlady-"What makes you think
this is a game of chicken, Mr.. Bord.
err"
! Mr.. Border-"He seems to be
trine overturned"
Bills-"Wonder If Smiths have a
family skeleton?'
wills.-"The dressmaker says she
pads"
Rill--You don't mean to say that
mosquito bites caused those Jumps on
your head? 80
Wilis-No, that is where | hammer.
ed myself batting at them-Exchange
do you think that mosquitoes car
ry malaria?"
81 dunno" answered Farmer Corn.
tossal "They never took any away
from here. ."-Washington Star.
Bills-"What makes you think that
bread cast on the waters will not re-
turn after many days.
Wills-"I just saw a man throw n
couple of hash house sinkers over.
board"
Eva.-"Thc count is going to marry
the Montana heiress
Edna lin surpriseJ flor the love OF
goodness"
Eva--"No. for the love of money
Chicago News.
Rev. DR.. Torker-I'm pleased to see
that you attend church so regularly. |
hope you have found grace.
Fargorn-Excuse me. but her name
is Helen. All! There she is now
good mornlng.-Life.
you lost money in Wall street did
you?"
81 wouldn't say lost 1t, answered
the precise though unworldly man.
"The word lost implies remote pos.
sibility Of its being found again. -
Washington Star,
"Tomkyns is delighted with the
new apartment house he moved into
last spring. He is going to marry a
girl on the floor below"
, Marrying beneath him, eh? Poor
old Tomkyns! s!"-Cleyeland Plain Deal.
! ! er
"Why do you pine?" asked the heir
ess in a tone redolent with sarcasm,
! after having presented the young man
In the case with the icy digit.
well, If you must know" he an
I swered, tits because I'm poor and can't
, afford to mahogany. Chicago Daily
, News.
: Some officers of an American ship
, were dining with a mandarlan at Can
ton. One of the guests wished for a
, second helping of a sayory stew, which
he thought was some kind of duck
and, not knowing the word in Chinese
held his plate to the host, saying, with
smiling approval:
"Quack, quack, quack!"
His countenance fell when his host
pointed TO the dish, responded:
Bow, WOW, wow! "-Southwestern't
Book.
NOT WHAT HE REQUIRED.
Physician--You should drink plenty
. OF pure milk, as it contains all tn,
elements of blood.
Patient-EXcuse me, doctor. but In
not boodthirsty.
; JOYS OF MATRIMONY.
Miss Knox suppose you and you
wife get along well together.