The Cairo bulletin. (Cairo, Ill.) 1???-1928, 1908-04-19
MATRIMONIAL AGENCIES.

The Chicago judge trying the matrl
menial agency cases eharacterizes the
patrons of these agencies as moral
and mental derelicts"
This is little bit too severe; but
if the scorn of these words viii have
1.-THE effect OF deterring the weak. silly
and sentimental creatures from furth.
Ter patronage OF such equivocal bu-
lreaus, the severity viii not have been
used in vain.
1t requires not a little credulity AMI
Stiffness to believe that a husband or
wife made t. order, can be ordered
through the mail True the big mail
order houses propose to furnish every
thing from a needle TO an elephant,
| upon the mere receipt of a letter de-
manding the article desired II is
Ireally f0nderful too, how nearly these
houses live up to what they advertise
aud with what passing celebrity the
multitudinous and various orders ara
illed But the NEST advanced con.
Germ Of these modern Institutions ha4
not yet offered to supply a husband Or
wife by mail But fools rush in
where angels fear to tread" Matri
monial agencies propose to play theI
part Of equity to the biz mail houses
plan of the law. The former wcuH
step IN aud supply the deficiency sup
posed 10 be occasioned by reason Of
the university OF the mail order
houses supply
Here is a husband for you, for the
,sking.' say these agencies, And, sir
wife for you Just drop us a line
Mentioning preference as to style. age.
habits and circumstances. Then put i'll
mr. order We. with Uncle Sans
help will do the rest.
No limit is put upon fancy none up
on desire. Picture your angel wife Of
your pipe dream Of husband and IL
YOU can reduce to writing this fancy
sketch. why. send II in. with the de-
nand for its naturalization, and by
love. you get il by return mail.
Isn't it superb? Isn't it sublime
ii least in its effrontery to common
sense? Yet there are thousands Of
foolish elderly people and myriads Of
sentimental young folks who go npl
against this picturesque gold brick,
betting their hard earned dollars
against their Eighty and easily wooed
romance
The thing is vicious in that it tends
% bring matrimony into contempt,
makes a sordid cash transaction ont
+ the marriage contract, mislcads %
OF of uusopnisticated simpletous and
axes away their dollars aud their ex
Dectations pretty much as does any
ther hazardous gambling event. But
lie yotaries OF the matrimonial agea
les insist that it is game Just ana
amusement, followed for the fun of IT,
I'm investment in the idle speculations
f fancy 4 SOFT OF gate money To an
Elaborate Castle in Spain
If | should get that rich, hand
ONE, good-natured generous husband
have ordered what viii | 40 with
i'm? What will he DO with and for
ne?7 And with this as a starter tho
oyely air castle begins to construct
'scli and the deyotec feels that she
las got her moneys worth long ere II
'umbleg down about her ears.
But this same sort of fancy game IL
put up as an excuse for buying lotter.
ickets III / should win the prize
All. yes, We have all heard These
Voices. We have al listened To them
become infatuated with them and pcr
mitted them. pretty much like the
voices OF the sirens of old, to destroy |
our usefulness, at least temporarily
lot the prosaic duties of life
The game then is neither a good
pne orr in amy way advantageous. 1.
isn't pure. it isn't useful it isn't bono
icial; on the contrary il is positively |
larmful in a number of ways, aud,
Uncle Sam Is doing quite the proper
thing when he says Cut it out" and
goes to work using the knife to get rid
) fit -NCommercial Appeal.