davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
The Questions Were Pertinent.

Heinrich Conried, the retiring manager
of the Metropolitan Opera house, said at
"A recent dinner in New York:
Yes, in that crisis | made mistake,
as queer mistake as one th.t was
made last week by a friend OF mine, a
Lutheran clergyman.
"The clergyman had advertised for n
butler and the next morning after break
fast well dressed clean shaven young
man in black was ushered into his study.
3" Name, pleaseY said the clergyman.
" Hilary Arbuthnot, sir
'AgeT
" Twenty
What work have you been accus-
toned to-?
I am lawyer, SIR
The clergyman started. This was odd.
However. as he knew, many We're called
in the law, few chosen.
" But he said, do you understand the
conduct of a householder
" In a general way, yes, murmured
the applicant.
Can YOU carye?'
Yes
Wash glass and silverT
seemed embarrassed. He frowned and
biushed. Just then the clergyman's wife
entered
. Are you married?' was her first ques-
ton.
That, said the Young man. was
what | called to see your husband about,
madam | desire to know if he can make
IT convenient to officiate at my wedding
Ut noon next Thursday week New
York Times.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
BRYAN condenses Solomon.

William Jennings Bryan has tried his
hand at condensing one of the proverbs
of Solomon. In speech before the Leg
islature of Oklahoma he said:
''One proverb i have often quoted is
The wise man forseeth the evil and hid
eth himself, but the foolish pass on and
are punished 1t is a great truth. and
beautifully expressed, but ! found it lid
not stick in peoples minds. and so con
densed it. and il is the only effort | have
ever made to improve upon proverb,
and this is not an improvement, it is
merely condensation. 1t is not as beau
tiful as Solomon's proverb, but it is more
easily remembered. 1t means the same
man gets the idea into his head; the
foolish man gets it i'll the neck - olum-
bia State.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
The Habit of a Bear.

Wall street associates Of the great
bear" James X. keene, admit almost
unanimously that the financier is seldom
caught mapping. They declare. however,
that Mr. Keene is absent minded oeca-
sionaIly. and tell this story on him TO
Prove it. Keene ana his fellow bull
batter" Washington +. Connor We're at
7he keene country place outside of New
York. 1t was Il beautiful summer even
ing and Conner proposed stroll through
the magnificent grounds Though the
guest had left all the cares and worries
Of the street in the city. apparently his
hest had not. The two started on the
walk. but Conner noticed that Keene
was strangely uncommunicative. Sud
denly the full moon appeared above the
trees. and Conner regarded its splendor
in silence for a moment. Then he turned
10 his companion.
Isn't the moon beautiful. Keene?" he
asked.
Yep: but it's too high, too highn' was
the preoccupied answer, with sigh
New York Sun.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
The Desire to Reform.

Frederick Van Eeden. the Dutch poet
and economist, discussed poverty at a
tea in New York.
There is enough in the world for us
all. said Mr.. Van Eeden NO one
would freeze. no one would starye TO
death. if we really desired 20 reform our
economies. if we really desired to be
Just and fair"
He smiled sadly.
We say we want reform" he said.
We'll, we want it about as badly as a
Dutch student ! knew in my youth.
Ihis students chum said to him:
Look here, I'm tired Of the life I've
been leading for the past two years.
I'm going TO reform This morning |
shall attend a lecture
My student, confirmed idler.
yawned put down his pipe, and an
swered.
Yes, II would be splendid to re-
form. And vet the beer is very good
here this morning. isn't itY | tell Won
what Wen do Wen let my dog will
helm decide whether We reform or not
Wilhelm decide! How will he do
oh, it is very simple Wen tell the
waiter 70 bring piece of sausage Wen
set the sausage before Wilhelm. and il
ne eats It we stay where we are. II
ne doesn't. we reform aud 20 to lee,
lures. Washington Star
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Proof Positive.

\ story has ecently been told in the
fleet of an iIcident which happened
when Admiral Evans was in command
of the Indiana. says Harper's Weekly
An old time bluejacket was ut the mast
before Capt. Evans. charged with get
ting food out of mess chest outside of
meal hours. This getting food for night
watches is a common and strong desire
on the part of most men aboard ship.
Capt. Evans asked the man what he
lad to say. and the man. sizing up the
delicate situation, said:
Captain. | didn't take no food outer
that chest Why Captain. there weren't
no food in that chest, looked in that
chest, and Captain, ! met Il cockroach
ccming out of that chest with tears in
his eyes"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Sporting Life in Burma.

4 fOIm OF Speculation not generally
known in England but very popular in
Burma is bull racing. 4 certain native
sportsman is the owner of one of these
bulls. for which he has refused an offer
of 10000 rupees. 1t has won several
races and is looked after and as careful
liz tended as a Derby favorite. The
owner values it at $4,000 rupees, and it
is said it bring him in an annual income
of from 12000 rupees to 1900 1t is
carefully guarded by four men lest it
may be got nj and "doctored"
Burmans also patronize boxing eager
Iy, but the art can scarcely be practiced
according to Queenshury rules, for we
are told by a provincial reporter that
he has observed that even the best box
ers strike ont with their eyes tightly
shut. and if they do hit each other il Is
more by chance than anything else
Calcutta Statesman
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
old Mis-, Moon Came Too

Nine. Fairfax was wont to stand on
the porch of her old Virginia home and
rejoice or moonlight nights in the
beauty. There's my moon" she would
say, as il rose from behind the eastern
hills. Look. Dahlia, see how beautiful
it is" and her tiny colored maid. who
was ever at hand with shawl or fan for
her beloved mistress. would answer en-
Enthusiastically. Your moon certainly do
look pow'ful handsome tonight" When
Nine. Fairfax journeyed to the city 10
visit her son, Dahlia, looking out of the
window with wondering eyes ON the first
evening of her life away from home, ex-
claimed in voice of mingled astonish-
ment and relief. well. | declar' to good
ness if old Mis- Moon amt done come
along to Washington wifi me and old
Mis-, We can't he homesick nohow, wifi
old Mis- Moon shining on us."-1outh's
Communion.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
The College Game.

SilaS Whipperwill had not been in col
lege over a month until he began using
all the student slang in addition to uni
Versity mannerisms. Then he wrote his
father like this
Dear Father: This college game is GER
tainly expensive | can't stay In IT with,
out more cash, II Is hard to get good re-
suits without the necessary money. | am
a stranger here and my credit is no good.
Your loving son, SlLAS.
BY the next mail he received this:
Dear Silas Quit the game. Your father
never could play poker so / don't see no
use In your trying 10 win, Your loving
FATHER.
The Bohemian
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
A Contradictory Reply.

Commissioner Bingham of New York
discussing the ease of policeman found
guilty of protecting gambling houses,
said:
The man lied TOO naiveIy in defense of
his innocence He was like carpenter
employed last month by newspaper
friend Of mine.
My newspaper friend writes good
deal at home and his study being next to
the nursery the children'S noise dis
iurbed him, and he employed a carpenter
10 make the wall sound proof between
abe two rooms.
III fix it all right, said the carpen-
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Adventurous Life in India

Tram travelling in Calcutta evidently
calls for special training of the nervous
system. A correspondent gives details OF
three mishaps which he observed during
the space of few hours. He saw one
car with no apparent excuse crash into
another standing at a junction. In the
next case he saw car, upon which the
driver was engaged in drinking "iota
of water, charge a number of bullock
carts, and his final experience was Of
eyclist contemplating the ruins of his
bicycle and addressing measured and ad-
jectival language to an official at the
steering wheel, Advocate of India
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
riner awhiskersn as Poison.

In the reeollections of a well known
that after SHINING a tiger it is always
necessary to guard its whiskers, as the
notiyes have an unpleasant habit of cut
ting them mp very small and mixing
them with the curry of those they dis
like The finely divided bristles set up
an irritaat poison, the results of which
often prove serious.-London Globe.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
A Princeton Students Wit

An ingenious and amusing answer was
recently given by a student In the natu-
raj philosophy class at Princeton univer-
Sity.
An instructor gave the question: DE
hne transparent, translucent and
opaque"
II cannot. professor" answered the
student precisely define these terms.
but | can Indicate their meaning in this
way; The windows of this room were
once transparent, they are now transm-
cent, and If not cleaned very soon. they
will be opaque, "-Lippincott's.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Dogs at Church.

Az the Methodist district conference
beid NJ Hartsville last month resou-
ION WAS offered by the committee on
church property and unanimously adopt
"a by the conference urging the trustees
- tbe several charges throughout the
Elorence district to forbid the attend
ance If dogs at church during the hours
~ worship, such being not only NUS
&c, bnf an embarrassing ar. dangerous
,,,,isance. Florence Times.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21

In public house in Nottingha@ F.y-
land. recently a rubicund faced S''',N
man, a red haired freshman ana = T.
EngliShman argued as to which OF ''
three countries possessed the ll4Ises
men. by the holy virgin, said J i, a.. !;
lin Ireland there are men of 'fh.
"Weel. weel. mon." said the Scotchih"Ifi
in bonnie Scotland there are men ~
Ayr" by jove. now: don't you know,
said the Englishman. In HingiaHd' Z.
the Thames, there hare lighter-meA.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Increasing Use of Electricity in Spain

There were in Spain in 1901 onlT ~
electric power stations, of which O3l
were for public lighting and 30 for pr
power stations for electric lighting mas
increased considerably, ana it may De
added also that the use of electricity iH
il many other applications has also ID.
creased and become more general e0l
there IS still vast field for SurtbgF III
,lnstrial dcYelopLla hts, as the supply 81
power which the country atforas : y.
tar from being exhausted. SEE b..''~
i fnprican
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
Saving the MASSACHUSETTS woods.

IS a result Of the efforts to saF' ~
North Shore woods from destructIoh =.
the gypsy moths more than 1000 49,
have been treated by clearing on 4
burning the underbrush. and nests s.s
os0ted by tree climbers. There have
400 men at work. About so h'.-
acres have been found which are l-
or less thickly infested. although SONG
them have not very many moth A.s.
Boston Advertiser.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21

stroke quiekened he still felt the same.
lie got over the period of distress. and
WIS stronger than ever There was
nothing in the world but his oar and
the back OF No. 3 And so they rowed
on. stroke after stroke.
Then doubt began to wake in his mind.
He took momentary glance to the
right. There was 10 glimpse of the
other boat, and, surely, the confused
continuous roar into which they were
rowing had already note of triumph.
and triumph not for them.
They had reached tie Households now.
and, oh, JOY there was ripple to the
night. lie did not dare to shift his eve.
but there was ne rudder coming back
to them. He had not known until that
moment what lot he still had in him.
The shouts were deafening, and seemed
made up entirely of that grotesque col
| lege YELL But there was only one
American houseboat just here-the Van
Troops. He could not have denied him
self that one glance if the race had de-
pended on it.
The American flags with r'hich the
houseboat was draped seemed to hit
him IN the face. But there was one
| little glimpse of cerise, and one voice
was calling 'Ieander."
Probably the sole exertions of bow
oar have never yet won race. but
Godfrey Linden, for the few lung split
ting minutes that remained, felt rs If
he must be pulling the boat round.
Henley to London? He could row 10
Antwerp at that pace if the Others
would do their share.
| The noise increased incredibly. Tnev
We're rowing down dense avenue q;
yelling, waving humanity The canvas
of the other boat came Slipping back to
them; the passionately vociferous cox.
gallant stroke, stern seven, huge six.
| five, four. three, went past quicker and
lquicker Then they hung, ard came on
again, and the roof of heacen was split
| by the noise.
a squirt! Oh. surely, there was no
answering that Neither heart nor
lungs could stand it. London was out OF
the question now, Antwerp an absurd
iity. The judges box was the utmost
limit.
Stroke quickened He was answered
CALAMITY, and back came the other boat
again. Then she began to gain once
more. 1t was all over.
| No! All OF a sudden back she came
with q rush 1t was as if her crew had
reversed their oars. Godfrey, giving M
| his last ounce, was aware of the other
bows back, which he had not before
seen, and then
The gun! Easy all!
| Leander had won.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
A Testimonial Rennested

Stories at the expense of the woman
suffragists are innumerable One man
has noticed that his sister is making
inroads upon his haberdashery. He com
plains that she might at least give him
a testimonial.
Nv hat do you meang" asked the lady
Well, you might say something like
this, Dear Jack. since using your shirts
and collars am a new woman. 49, Black
and White
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21

swell. l guess you made rlistake,
Mr.. Linden. OF course, l wanted the
boys to win, not you. Why, | should
be ashamed to do such thingl"
But he knew she had, although, in the
excitement of the moment. nobody else
seemed to have noticed it-Arehibald
Marshall in the London Mail.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21

Ter. confidently. The best thing to DO
will he to line it with shayings.'
'.He completed the job, then he called
the literary man in.
She's sound-proof all right now he
said
Wen test her, said the literary man.
You stay here
And going into the nursery he called
to the carpenter in the study.
= Can yOu hear me-
mo sir, l can't was the prompt re-
ply Washington Star.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
A Careful Man.

When Dawson reached town the other
day he was suddenly seized with terrific
toothache. and he repaired at once to
dentist. Investigation showed that, the
tooth was in such condition that the
only way to extract il comfortably was
10 put the sufferer under the influence of
gas. Consequently Dawson threw him
self back in the chair and the tube was
applied. He did not succumb any too
readily. but in the course of time he was
sleeping peacefully. and the offending
molar was removed.
How much. doctor?" asked the pa
tient after the ordeal was over.
Ten dollars" said the dentist. busi-
ness being dull.
Ten d0llarsE" roared Dawson.
yes. sir" said the dentist. 1T was
an unusually hard job getting tina tooth
out, and YOU required twice the Ordinary
amount of gas.
"Hmph,' CALCULATED Dawson. as he
paid up Here's your money, but ! tell
YOU right now the next time | take gas
from you you've got 10 put meter on
me.'-Harper's Weekly
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-08-21
THE SPICE OF LIFE.

In Campaign Times
The bird is singing in The tree
Unheard his melodies expand.
What chance has one SO small as De
Against the glee club and the bandf
Washington Star.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14
REAL ESTATE rRANsFERs

Following Is a list of real estate
transfers Of Kootenai county as fur
nished by the Occur d'Alene Abstract
4 Title Guarantee company;
p. J. Bennett TO Joseph Prussia.
lot ., block ?. Benefits add. to
Athol; s25.
p. J. Bennett to Frank Let's. lot
10. block 2, BENEFITS add. to AthOl;
Ss5.
Lars G. Heiberg to n. NJ. Bren-
ford. eh nwN and lots | and 2. sec,
80, tp. 40, r. W.; 81.
D. NJ. Branford to Lars G. Hell
berg, same as last above; 81.
Taylor Bros. to Mrs. Loretta M.
Reilly. lot .. block IA. Taylor's ad-
dltion to Occur d'AIene. S20Q
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14
BUTTE BOYS MOB POLICE
At High School Blacken Eyes and
Iniure Officer.


Injure Officer.
BUTTE, Mont, March 14.-In a
riot at the high school this after
noon, in which about 100 students
engaged, Policeman Whitman was
badly beaten. The eyes of the pa
trolman were blackened, he was
tripped and thrown down and kicked
and his helmet made football by
enraged boys. Patrolman Smith at
tempted to aid officer Whitman, but
the students massed themselves
about Whitman and blocked the eff
forts of Officer Smith. The police
used their clubs and it was this, the
boys claim, that provoked the trouble
in the first place, the students OBJ
jecting to any interruption to a game
of baseball in progress on the street
Harold Lindsay, the student who is
alleged to have driven his right into
Whitmans face, was chased through
the school building by the police, but
escaped. The other leaders in the
riot made safe getaways. An inves-
tigation is on foot.
Officer Whitman is the patrolman
who last fall incurred the wrath of
the boys by attempting to compel
them to extinguish a large bonfire
which they had built in the street in
celebration of the football victory
over Spokane high school.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14
FIGHT 1T OUT AND WIN

The Press does not believe that
there will be one vote cast against
county seat removal in this city when
election day comes. That will give
us a clear majority on the question,
with the support OF the adjoining
precincts. With the proper effort to
show the people of the other pre-
cincts the advantages of change of
location to this city and the danger
from fire which constantly meancea
the records in the old fire-trap at
Rathdrum. 1t will be seen that Occur
d'Alene has most excellent show
to win. There is no reason why all
the people living south Of this city
should not support the proposition.
1t appeals to their pocketbook, to
their convenience and to their good
judgment along the line of the most
good to the greatest number, which
Is one of the cardinal principles OF
our form Of government.
In the mass meeting held Thurs
day evening there was much discus
sion about the size OF the executive
committee and 1t was doubled. 1t ID
the Oficlal head Of the movement
but every citizen OF Coerr d'Alene
ought to consider himself and her
self--we are not going to leave the
women out OF this night, because
they can do az much as the men
COMMITTEES Of one to boost for
county seat removal. Make It your
business 10 talk with every person
you see. from every part of the
county, every time you meet them
In fact, every citizen of Occur
d'Alene ought to make an effort to
secure at least one vote for removal
from an outside precinct This city
must resolve itself Into a committee
OF the whole for the purpose OF con-
sldering and boosting all matters
that win help us in the fight. Let US
choose for our motto the immortal
words Of that creates. general the
world has ever produced. Ulysses s.
Grant: 1--WE will fight 1t out on this
line II It takes all summer" Do
that and the victory Is ours beyond
question Of doubt.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14

The Press does not create the
news; It prints the news for its read
ers. and to suppress news would be
TO deceive those who pay for the
service. People who do things that
make news in which the public is in.
terested ought to think Of the pub
llcity that may follow the commits
sion Of acts which they would sup
press. There are certain duties
which newspaper owes the public.
among the most important being to
print the news as II occurs. without
fear or favor. We are speaking Of
newspaper. and not an organ
owned by some one who uses It's pub
fishers to promote their private or
personal interests and ambitions
The Press prints today's news today.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14
INLAND TO MOSCOW
WIN begin Laying steel In Few
Weeks.

VIII Begin Laying Steel In a Few
Weeks.
PALoUSE, Wash. March IA
Julius Muhrbeck. superintendent of
construction on the Spokane & In
land, has been In Palouse during the
week looking over the ground and
arranging to begin laying steel on
the Moscow extension about April /.
Mr.. Muhrbeck states that from rs
to 100 men will be required on the
work. and that the scale of wages
will be 81 a day. The men will be
hired here, in order to give work to
as many local men as possible. and
an employment agent will be main
tanned here while the work is In
progress, The men on the entire
job win be paid of here. getting
their pay checks through the local
agent.
The grading between here and
Moscow was practically completed
last fall. with the exception OF one
large dirt cut about half way be-
tween the two towns, It Is estimat-
ed that trains win be running into
Moscow by August 1. A local rumor
Is that the road win be built on to
Lewiston without any delay.
At 4;40 p, m. the senate adj
journed until Monday.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-03-14

has been In eating the delicacies and
perusing the books and papers
brought him by faithful friends.
Thus Is the city administration re-
lieved of the hateful charge that 1t
has forced a man of Hummel's
wealth, culture and ability to in
dulge In anything so vulgar as man
ual labor.
Greatest on Earth.
Hail, Gentle Spring! We know
now, of a surety, that you are on the
way, because the circus is here. The
very greatest on earth" arrived to-
day, with its herds of ponderous
pachyderms, it's fifty dens-count
'em, fifty-of rare wild beasts, it's
500 horses and it's army of perform
ers, beast and human. The first per-
Torrance will be given in Madison
Square Garden next Thursday even
ing, and the intervening time will
be used in rehearsing the new pro-
gram.
The coming of the circus to the
metropolis is a distinct event. Those
who imagine that New Workers are
beyond such bucolic pleasures as
those afforded by the sawdust arenas,
the death-defying feats of daredevil
artists who have appeared before the
crowned heads of Europe, and the
seductive lure of the vendors of pop
corn and pink lemonade have an
other mental process coming.
Stripped of his affected superior
ity, the New Yorker is a real Amer
lean, and to all such the circus is and
will be joy forever. Happy is the
man who can use the worn-out ex-
cuse that he Unjust take the child
rem"