The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1908-01-10
CAPTAIN seth TALKS
OF HUMAN DOCFISH

There was fire in the big stove in
the T wharf reading-room, 1t was the
frst really cold day of the season, and
the place was we'll patronized. An ex-
citing game of dominoes was going on
at a corner table, where three fisher
men were fighting ii out for the cham
pionship of the fish pier. Each man
had a little group OF hackers, who ar
gued noisily. A husky doryman was
leaning back in his chair turning over
the pages OF file of Our Dumb Ami
mails in bored manner, while four
graybeards were clustered around the
stove watching the smoke curl out
through joint in the stovepipe.
The door opened. letting in a cold
blast. and tall man entered and
hastily closed ii behind him.
Any letters here for Seth Par
sons?" he demanded, and the retired
fishing captain who manages the read
ing-room came forward to look through
his tiny post office.
"Nothin' dom, Capt Seth" he said,
Guess they didn't spect We so
soon"
Seth grunted, and then removed his
coat and about three yards of red
muller. He had a gray tuft of hair on
his chin, and his grizZled locks looked
sadly in need of a BARRIERS attention,
but he was sturdy old man with
a good-natured grin.
At the stove they made room for
him respectfully.
When did We get In, Seth?" asked
an old man with long gray beard who
was smoking vile tobacco in a black
ened clay pipe.
Half an hour ago" replied Seth,
settling himself before the fire and
producing a we'll colored meerschaum
which he SYSTEMATICALLY filled and
lighted
Got a good trip"
NO" said Seth, disgustedly. The
burned fish wouldn't bite or else there
weren't any"
II guess the fishin' banks amt no
more to be depended on than the
money banks said the old man.
you can't git much out of either these
days"
We'll" said Capt Seth, 1T won't
trouble no bank much to pay for what
fish | got. First thing know the own
er'l be tellin me they need a young
er man, that can get fish when he
goes after it."
you don't need to worry bout that
with what money you got in the
bank" returned the other.
Il need to worry about the bank
though" said Seth. Every time |
come in l draw a check just to see
if they're still dom business. Where
would | be if the bank should bust,
Ezra Jenkins?'
Bout where | am now" said
Ezra, with a doleful grin, and there
was chuckle from the others, for
Ezra subsisted in great part upon his
friends
What's this money trouble all
man who sat by the wall half envel-
oped in a cloud of tobacco. MY old
woman took all she had out of the
bank and keeps it under the mat
tress; but what she's afeared Of !
dunno"
Il amt no fnancier," said Capt
Seth, but | can see through a ladder,
| can. You can't get money out of
the banks for the same reason that
can't get fish on the banks. Cause
It amt there"
Why amt 1t there? Didn't we put
1t there?" demanded Ezra
Huh" said Capt. Seth. II tell you
why it amt there. You fellers all
know that Georges is stocked with
millions and millions of fish, had
dock, hake and pollock. We sail
down there and We got TO do
certain things to get the fish
We bait our hooks and set our travis
and then wait for the fish But the
doghsh is right down there with the
fish, and hasn't any forms to go
through. He simply opens his mouth
and swallows them right down.
It's the same in a bank You step
up to big iron gTatin', and ask the
man lISIuS ii lie WOu IledSt give you
what belongs to you. Well, they's hui
man dogfish, and they're inside
the gratin' They's nothin' to stop
them and they just gobble up all the
money, while the poor fisherman with
his line through the payin teller's win
dow never gets a bite, and the teller
tells him that OWN to the condition of
the money market he'll have to wait
till everybody comes round and depos-
it's some more"
Capt. Seth made his point, and
! locked around for contradiction.
There was none, and he hit his
knee a resounding whack
I'm In favor Of congress putin a
bounty on dOgfsh, and eXterminatin'
EN- and If they put a bounty on hui
man dog ish the banks d be safe
enough
DO you think that there's goin' to
be hard tines" asked Ezra Jenkins
Yes" said CAPT. Seth. Hard times
| for the banks. I'm goin' to dig hole
in my back yard and bury my money
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