davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Queer, but True.

For this here splurge." said the ca
terer, do the guests know one another
we'll or are they jest passin' acquaint-
ances:"
"Oh, they are intimate friends, life
long friends
''Then," said the caterer. "I'll add 20
per cent to that estimate If you don't
mind"
But do mind. Why
Twenty per cent more for lifelong
friends" the caterer insisted. ''I'd be
out of pocket otherwise. A bunch Of
friends at a splurge always eat fifth
more than bunch Of passin' acquaint-
ances or strangers. Didn't you never
notice that?' he concluded as he recti-
ned the bill. You might have noticed
it from your own experience. Among
strangers you're Ill at ease, nervous;
that takes your appetite away. But
with friends you're quite at home. and
you eat like a horse" New Orleans
Times Democrat.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Over Thirtv-Fiyc Years

In 1872 there was great deal of
diarrhoea, dysentary and cholera in
fantum. 1t was at this time that Cham
berlains Collie, Cholera and Diarrhoea
Kennedy was first brought into use. 1t
proved more successful than any other
remedy or treatment, and has for thirty
five years maintained that record. From
a small beginning its sale and use has
extended to every part of the United
and to many foreign countries. Nine
druggists ont Of ten will recommend it
when their opinion is asked, although
they have other medicines that paw
them greater profit. 1t can always be
depended upon, even in the most severe
and dangerous cases. For sale bv F.. F.
Ellsworth.
FOR SALE-A good one horse Moline
wagon with springs, cheap. l.. S. Trow-
bridge.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Glanced the Name.

He had given up town life, with it's
cares and dissipation. and was living
In the country
What charming cottagew exclaim-
ed a dainty lady visitor from London.
What have You called it:'
Il have called it the Nutshell" he
told her. and she exclaimed:
"Oh, how delightful"
After tea and cakes she took the
train back to London. where she re-
manned for six months. Then she ran
down" to see him again.
LAS swee: as ever" she told him.
But you nave changed the name.
Why is it now Chez NouS?''
Why" he responded. with some
warmth. Because | was tired of be-
ing joilied. Because | was tired OF
being kidded. There isn't boy for a
mile round wh" hasn't stopped and
fung the doorhel every time he passed
to ask if the colonel WAS in."-L London
Telegraph
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
The Servant Girl In Germany.

In most German households there Is
NO such thing as the strict division OF
labor insisted on here. Your COOK Will
I've elghted to make a blouse for you,
and your nurse will turn oat III the
dining room, while your chamberma1d
will take the child for all airing II you
order it so. They are more human IN
their relation to their employers. Inc
English servant fixes a gulf between
herself and the most democratic mis-
tress. The German brings her Intimate
Joys and sorrows to good herrscna1t
and expects their sympathy.
When a girl has bad luck and en-
cages with bad herrschaft she IS
worse off than In England because she
is more in the power Of her employers
and Of the police than she would be
here. She has to have dienstbuch'
an Official book in which her age and
personal appearance are registered. In
this book her employers write hef
character 1t is under the controi OF
the police and has to be shown to them
when she leaves and when she enters
a situation. 1t is hardly necessary to
say that when girl does anything
seriously bad and her employers record
It In the book the book gets lost.
Then the police interfere and make II
extremely disagreeable for the girl.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Youthful LOGIC.

Mrs. L.. young aud inexperienced
Sunday school teacher, was at times
sorely perplexed how to answer the
questions put to her by some OF her
unusually bright pupils. One day just
after she had finished telling the chill
dren the story that Adam was the first
man God created quiet reigned in the
class room for several minutes. Sud
denly up jumped little Rosie and IN a
piping voice said. "Oh. teacher. you for
got to tell us whether God created
Adam right away man or Il baby"'
Embarrassed Mrs. l.. looked up to the
ceiling and then to the children for an
inspiration. Happily she quickly spied
Betty's little hand raised above the
others eager to answer the question.
Teacher, | am surprised my sister
Rosie should ask such foolish ques-
ton Why, God must have created
Adam right away u big man. because
IL God had created him baby he
would have had to have mother to
take care of him.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
A Surprise Comma.

A horse was standing along Chestnut
street the other day anchored by an
iron weight, The horse. not knowing
what else 10 do to pass away the time.
was industriously chewing the strap.
4 newsboy happened along and after
watching the animal for awhile he
grinned cluster of grins and turned
to man who was standing near
Don't say Il word" he ;s!eefully re-
marked. old Umpire here is going to
have the surprise Of his life In few
minutes"
What is the matter with himY" ask
ed the man. glancing first at the kid
and then at the horse.
''Nothin' is the matter with him."
was the happy rejoinder Of the news
boy. He may eat the strap all right,
but when he gets down to that weight
he will think he has struck a boardin
house. "-Philadelphia Telegraph.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Restaurant Stories.

81 don't care for the vulgar type OF
restaurant story" said a New York ho-
tel keeper. Il refer to that type where
the guest shouts angrily to the waiter:
ugh, this steak IS not fresh. What
a horrible SMELL Here, waiter judge
for Yourself.
But, shaking his head, the waiter
points to the next table and answers
grimly:
beg pardon, sir, you're quite
wrong. It's the other gentleman's
fish
Or the story Of the man who com
planned about his planked shad, wind
Ing up:
81 hope you don't think me unrea-
sonable. waiter|
mo. no, SIR the waiter answered.
You're the sixth person what has COM
planned about that portion of shad.'
'On a somewhat higher plane are the
meat stories. Thus a strange guest
says:
"'Surely this isn't barber shop as
well as restaurant? | see lot of
razors lying about
"'Oh, no, sir" says the waiter.
Those are for the steak customers.
Did you say steak, sir?'"
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Vary PatiAnf.

A doctor, now eminent, was at oua
time serving as inferno In one of the
Philadelphia hospitals as we'll as hold
ing his own with coterie Of rather
gay friends. On certain morning the
physician awoke to find that he had
sadly oversight. Sleepily DOMINIC his
attire, he fastened to the hospital and
soon a stalwart young Irishman claim
ed his attention.
well, my man, what seems to be
your trouble this morning?" inquired
the doctor, concealing a yawn and TAX
ing the patient by the hand to examine
his pulse.
Faith. sor, it's all in me breathin',
doctor can't git me breath at all. at
ALL
THE pulse is normal, Pat, but let
me examine the lung action a no.
ment," replied the doctor, kneeling be-
side the cot and laying his head on the
Irishman's chest. Now let me hear
you talk he continued. closing his
eyes and listening attentively for
sounds Of pulmonary congestion.
A moment Of silence.
What will l be sayin', doctor?"
finally asked the patient.
'Oh, say anything Count Count
one, two. three and up. that way"
murmured the physician drowsily.
IVAN, two. three. fure. FIVE, six"
When the young doctor. with start,
opened his eyes. Pat was continuing
weakly. Tin hundred an sixty-nine,
tin hundred an sivinty. tin hundred
an sivinty- wan"-Success.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
A "Washina" Mission.

The visiting housekeeper recently de-
scribed in the New York Sun must be
stout armed angel or she would never
nave lived to write the entry in her
daybook quoted below:
washed the sick woman in bed,
washed and dressed four children, did
the washing, scrubbed two floors,
washed the dishes. washed the win
dows."
"A discriminating glance at this en-
try VIII disclose the fact that she
washed about every thing in the house.
How the head Of the family escaped
the wash rag is not stated. Perhaps
there was no head.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Moving Pictures.

Moving picture cameras are remark
able pieces Of mechanism. The films
are only three-quarters OF an inch
wide. These are in rolls, sometimes 800
feet long. When taking pictures the
camera man reels of these rolls just
as rapidly as they are unreeled when
thrown upon the canvas for the spec
tator. at u rate of ten or twelve films
second. Moving pictures are simply
number Of views thrown upon a
white sheet one after another so rapid
ly that the eye cannot detect the inter
walls.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
De You Remember

And die other fishing days when you
got up before dawn and stole do"n-
stairs TO the dim kitchen-a drink OF
milk. a doughnut and triangle OF pie,
then YOU stole out quietly to the barn
and got the spading fork; then the
search, armed with fork and tomato
can, under the broad leaves OF the rnu-
barb bed. back of the henhOuse and
down by the cow barn until you had
enough worms for the days sport.
Then of course you left the fork stick
Ing in the ground-you never would
learn to put things away-and started
off: through the garden and orchard,
stopping long enough for handful OF
currants and a pocketful of sopsavines
over the pasture bars. eating hand
full of huckleberries or low bush black
berries here and there; into the wood
road-very dark and still III the dawn
where you stepped along very quietly
so as not to disturb the bears you
knew perfectly well there were no
creepy sensations: then out through
the deep wet meadow grass to the riv-
er, where the sun was now beginning
to burn away the wisps OF mist and
the red winged blackbird were max
ing a tremendous fuss over their house
keeping. You reached the river bank
at the pout hole or the big rock or the
old willow tof course you know the ex-
act place., and then you started fish
ing-Atlantic.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Suction.

People often speak of chimneys
'dra wing" We also speak Of the sue
ton of pump. There is not so much
harm in these expressions. except that
they are liable to lead us away from
the true state affairs. But In truth
there is no such thing as suction. Sue
ton is merely partial or entire absence
of pressure in one place which enables
the greater pressure Of air or fluid in
another place to rush in. In the case
Of the chimney the heated air in it
does not weigh so much rs an equal
volume of cold air. and if the air in
the chimney. the air in the room AM
the outside air were all the same te:
perature there would be no tendency
to any motion. But when the air in
the chimney is hot it does not press
downWord so much as the colder sur
rounding air presses upward. Conse
quently an upward current is started
and will continue if the air in the
chimney is kept hot--A. S s. Alderman
in London Express
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
TIMER LAND ACT, JUNE 3, 1873
Notice for Publication
L. s. Land Office, Spokane, Wash


May 2S, 1903.
Notice is hereby given that III compliance
with the provisions OF the act of Congress OF
June 3, 1875 entitled An act for the sale of
tim Der lands in the States OF California, Ore.
gOn, Nevada, and Washington Territory" as
extended to all the Public Land States by act
OF August 1, 1892.
JANE NOURSE,
OF Newport, County OF Stevens, Stale OF Wash
ington, has this day filed in this office her
sworn statement No. 2297, for the pur-
chase OF the NEl4 NEt4 Of Section No.
IS, in Township No IS r., Range No "A
E. W M, and will offer proof to show tina, the
land sought is more valuable for it's timber or
stone than for agricultural purposes, and to
establish her claim 10 said land before Sidney
W. Rogers United States Commissioner for the
Eastern District OF Washington at Newport,
Wash, Wednesday, the 18th dav of August 1908.
She names as witnesses: Fred W. Greene
and Luzern Holman, Of Newport, Wash: Ole
c. Carlson and Otto Berghland, of Ruby, Wash.
ANY and all persons claiming adversely the
abOve-described lands are requested to file
their claims in this office ON or before said 18th
day of August, 1908.
5-28 7-3O HAL j. COLE, Register
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Smugelers' Philanthropy.

Al Broadmoor and Perth. England.
the criminal luna tics have a free SUM-
ply or the most exquisite pipe tobacco,
cigars and cigarettes. In fact, they
smoke far finer stuff than the average
rich man. Yet all this good tobacco
COSTS the government nothing. The
smugglers Of England pay for the
smoking OF the criminal insane. 1t is
from her coniscated Struggled tobacco
mat England fills the tobacco boxes of
Perth and Broadmoor.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
An Author Who Hated Water.

Nine. d'Arblay. better known as
Miss Fanny Burney, who took such an
important place In the literature Of the
eighteenth century, had an extraordi-
nary and most undesirable popularity.
She had the greatest aversion to wash
ing and water. Sir Henry Holland
was the physician who attended the
gifted authoress during the last year
Of her life. and she confded to him
that she had not washed for fifteen
years.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Chamberlain's Collie, Cholera and Diarr.
hoea Remedy Would Have Saved
Him 500

''1n 1902 had very severe attack of
diarrhoea," says Il. n. Farrar, of Cat
Island. La. For several weeks | was
unable to do anything On March IS,
1907, had similar attack, and took
Cham berlaIn's Collie, Cholera and Diar-
hoea Remedy, which gave me prompt
relief, [ consider it one of the best
medicines of it's kind in the world, and
had used it in 1902 believe it would
have saved me a 500 doctors bill.
Sold by E. f. Ellsworth.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Curious Book Titles,

Curious book titles are always being
rediscovered. mostly from that prolific
period the commonwealth, when sane
timony was supreme.
Thus: John Dances Better Than
Peter: Peter Dances Better Than John;
Both Dance Well'' Ga vicious attack on
the Jesuits, in five volumes). "a Sigh
For the Sinners Of Zion, Coming From
Hole In the Wall. by an Earthen YES
sell Known Among Men as Samuel
Fisher" twas this how taverns came to
take the sign of the "hole in the
wallgo-LondOn Scraps.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION.
Department OF the Interior,
Land Office at SpOkaue. WaShiu

Department OF the Interior,
Land Office at Spokane, Washington.
June 9, 19OS
Notice is hereby given that Martin A. Muir.
ray, OF Priest River, Idaho, who, ON March g.
1907, made Homestead Entry No. 1885, for the
NEA OF swl4 Of NEA. So OF Nw14 OF sw14 OF NE1144
81 OF swi4 OF NE14, So OF SEl4 of SEA OF NwA
E9 OF sw14 OF SEA of Nw14 SEA OF SEA of Nw144
NE4 OF sW14, NJ OF SEA Of sWA. NJ OF So OF
SEA OF swA, 81 of SEA of SEA Of swA sEl OF
sw1 Of SEA OF sw4, Nwl4 OF NwL of NwL4 of SEA
Of Section II, Township 30 North, Range as E,
NJ. has filed notice of intention to make
land above described, before the Register and
Receiver, U s. Land Office, at Spokane, Wash ),
on the 7th day of August, 1908.
Claimant names as witnesses; Garret Muir
ray, E. E. tombstone and NJ. E. Murray, OF
Priest River, Idaho; Marshall Fischer, of
Williams Idaho.
b-25 100 HAL J. COLE. Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department of the Interior
L. s. Land Office, Spokane, Wash,

L s. Land Office Spokane, Wash,
June 6. 1908.
Notice is hereby given that Nicholas H.
Schuster OF Elk, Wash, who. June 6, 1908,
made timber and stone sworn statement No.
1924, for the Lot and SEA swl4 of Section 30,
Township 81 ~, Range 4s E. ". NJ. has filed
notice OF intention to make final proof, to es-
before the Register and Receiver, q. S. Land
Office, at Spokane, Wash, on the l5th day of
September. 1908.
Claimant names as witnesses: Angns Nc
Donald, of Spokane, Wash; Frank E. Bryce
son and Minnie A. Schuster, of Elk Wash. w.
X. McGillivary, OF West Branch, Wash.
6.lS $40 HAL J. COLE, Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department of the Interior,
L. S. Land Office. SpOkane. Wash

Department OF the INTERIOR
e. S. Land Office, Spokane, Wash
July 20. 1908.
Notice is hereby given that n. E. Bonus
Roberts, of Dalkena, Wash, who, on Sept. g.,
1902. made homestead entry, No IA 1854 (0307j,
for VIZ NwA and Wiz sw14, Section 81 ,Township
81 North, Range A E. W. NJ, has filed notice
Of intention to make final fve-year proof to
establish claim to the land above describ-
ed, before Sidney W. Rogers, L. Com
missioner for the Eastern District of Wash
ington, at Newport, Wash. on the 9th dav Of
September, 1908.
Claimant names as witnesses: Philip E.
Lintz, OF Usk, Wash James Gregg, Hugh Ken
nedy and Mil Gordon, of Dalkena, Wash.
7-3O y-3 Hal J. Cole, Register
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department of the Interior,
Land Office at SnOkane WaShingtOn

department OF The InterIOr,
Land Office at Spokane, Washington,
July IL, 1908.
Notice is hereby given that Joe F. Kerr OF
Stevens county, Wash, who, on Nov. "a, 1906,
made Homestead Entry No. 1906 (Olll) lor
the E1a NE14, Nw14 NEI and NE4 NwL of
Sec. %, Twp. so, n, Range A E. W. NJ has filed
notice OF intention to make final commute
zion proof, 10 establish claim to the land bove
described, before the Register and Receiver u
s. Land Office, at Spokane, Wash on the 10th
day of September, 1908
Claimant names as witnesses: James R.
Rogers OF Scotia, Wash; Swan Anderson and
Charles Vanderhoom, of Camden, Wash; John
Rogers, OF Scotia, Wash.
7-30 9-3 HALL COLE. Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Unreuuited Genius,

The world has never learned the
name Of the genius who conceived the
idea OF spreading butter upon his
bread. combination of food elements
more palatable. more wholesome and
more universally popular than any
that the combined wisdom of all the
professors who have ever lived has
been able to devise.-Epicure.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
An Expert Carver.

Nine. Y. wishes to secure new but
Ter. you know how to serve the ia
bic and especially can you carve well?"
she asked an applicant
Madam may rest assured of it," he
replied When one has been ten years
surgeons servant in a dissecting
room one ought to understand his bust
ness"
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Not Her Abode.

My income is small" said a rather
ollatory lover, land perhaps it is cruel
OF me to take you from your fathers
roof
But don't live on the roof" was
the prompt reply.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department of the Interior,
Land Office at Spokane. WaSl


Land Office at Spokane, Wash
June 80, 1908.
Notice is hereby given that LeroyF. Pardoe,
of Penrith Washington, who. on June 30, 1908.
made timber and stone application No. 1856,
for the seq NEA OF Section s, Township 81 n,
Range a f. w. NJ, has filed notice OF intention
to make final proof, to establish claim to the
land above described before Sidney W
Rogers, U S. Commissioner for the Eastern
District of Washington, ut Newport. Wash. on
the I4th day of October, 1905.
Claimant names as witnesses: Norris Over
meyer and Martin Robinson, of Penrith, Wash.
Frank Z. Stewart and Carlton H Finley, of
Newport, Wash.
1908 hal J. COLE, Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Very Sharp.

Teacher-Now, Johnny, if the earth
were empty on the inside. what could
we compare it to? Johnny-A razor,
ma'am. Teacher-A razor? Johnny
Yes, ma'am; because it would be hol-
low ground.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
The Hard Knocks.

This old world at best Is only an
anvil and life sort Of Plutonian
blacksmith. that with varying blows,
strikes us into form. The blow that
hurts us most may shape US best"
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Deeply Affecting,

And when said Mrs. Nuvoreesh,
those French pheasants came by sing
ing the Mayonnaise it was too deeply
touching for words. "-Success Maya
zine.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30

Great souls are not those who have
fewer passions and more virtues than
the common. but those only who have
greater designs.-La Rochefoucauld.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION.
department Of the Interior,
L. S. Land Office. Spokane,

{. 5. Land Office, Spokane, Wash.
July 20, 1905.
Notice is hereby given that Mary Quade,
of Odessa, Washington. who, on July 20, 1909,
made timber and stone sworn statement, No.
$500, for Sc NE1 and E12 Nwl4 Sec %, Twp.32 N,
Range 43, E. " NJ, has filed notice OF inten :
ton to make final proof, to establish
claim to the land above described, before the
kane, Wash, on the Goth day OF October 1908.
Claimant names as witnesses; William J .
Geary, of Newport, Wash Joseph Jelik, OF
Spokane, Wash; Frank }, Svoboda and Peter
Quade, of Odessa, Wash.
7-30 l0-l Hal J. Cole. Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
The Natural Kind.

What sort Of steed do you suppose
was most popular during the days of
chivalry?'
Il suppose it was a nightmare"
Baltimore American.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
NOTICE FOR PUBLICATION
Department OF the Interior,
Land Office at CnOkaDp Wash

Department of the Interior,
Land Office at Spokane, Wash
July 3d. 1908.
Notice is hereby given that Walter NJ. Dee
Long, of Scotia, Wash who, ON March g, 1904,
made Homestead Entry No. 1906 (O355), for
the NE14, of Section 80, Township 81 North,
R. Al E. W. NJ, has filed notice o. intention to
make final Communication proof, to establish
claim to the land above described before Sidney
W. Rogers, U. S Commissioner for the Eastern
District of Washington, at Newport, Wash. on
the 9th day of Septem Der. 1908.
Claimant names as witnesses: May Fowler,
Ben Fowler, l. o. Kevilla and " Kevilla. all
of Scotia, Wash.
100 9-3 HAL j. COLE. Register.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Wisdom.

Neighbour Do you think your sister is
in love with Mr. Simpkins? Little
Dora-Of course not She allows US
children to remain in the parlor when
he calls.-Exchange.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Had Lifted One

"Pa, these burglars that blew nm a
store
go on
Are they shoplifters :'-Kansas Citv
Times.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Oriain Of Yankee Pronunciation

Origin Of Yankee Pronunciation.
It was these historic Suffolk families
who in the seventeenth century took
lar Suffolk pronunciation out of which
has developed the modern seminasal
Yankee twang.-London Spectator.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30

According to Chinese law. wife
VINO Is too laxative may De divorced.
The Newport miner. [volume] (Newport, Wash.) 1899-current, 1908-07-30
Yes and No.
Are you able to keep cook?"

~FjDanoial,E yes. djrlo-Gs EicqIlv.
~. -" aauA1s,0n sAefaiu.