davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-05-16
Brother Bob" the Giant Sheriff.

Dy lar the most luteTeStliiS iHeLuDel
of the Chanler family. however, is
Robert W., otherwise known as Broth
er Bob" He Is six feet three and
half inches tall, and every inch of him
is alive. He studied art for many
years in Paris and painted a picture
which was hung in the Paris salon.
Brother Bob is now sheriff of
Duchess county. and the manner of his
election should show the politicians a
few new ways to play the game. He
owned stock farm, and on it were
a famous blooded stallion and bull
of long pedigree. From these he al
lowed the farmers of the county to
breed free of charge. That county is
now filled with blooded stock, and
Chanler is sheriff, having been elected
by an enormous majority, although the
county is overwhelmingly Republican.
make people happy" is Sheriff Chan
ler's creed. AS he is of the type of
men who do things. the amount of
happiness he has spread about him has
become proverbial in the vicinity of
Barry tOwn, near which the Chanler
homestead is situated. Notwithstand
ing his great wealth, Brother Bob"
lives in an old farmhouse and usually
wears cheap hand down clothes.
Recently, when Governor Hughes
| was out of the state, New York had a
Democratic governor for the first time
in long. hungry years. Lieutenant
Governor Chanler held down the chair
of state for twenty-four hours. When
asked how it felt to be governor of the
| Empire State he replied:
about all have done is to work
| the long distance telephone in an eff
fort to get Sheriff Chanler of Duchess
| county, SO that | could notify him l
| was going to remove him. But Rob'S
| too clever. He must have got a line on
what | purposed TO do. for he wouldn't
answer the phone"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-05-16
By JAMES A. EDcERron.


THERE is not as much said now
as formerly about the presiden
tial candidacy of Lewis Stuyve-
SAINT Chanler, lieutenant govern
or of New York. "A few months ago
his boom was very much in evidence.
A number of leading Democrats fore
gathered and gave it their after dinner
approval. Then it sort OF dwindled,
and little more was heard of it. At
present 1t is impossible 10 say more
than that Mr.. Chanler is possibility.
That word possibility" is very tiexi-
BILE.
Yet had circumstances been different,
had William J. Bryan not copper rivet-
ed his cinch on the nomination. there
are very many things about Mr. Chan
Ter that would make him an available
candidate. His chief recommendation
is, of course. that he was elected to the
second office in the Empire State when
the head of the ticket was showed I'M
der to the tune of 10000. There Is
nothing succeeds like success, especial
ly in politics.
Another thing in CHAMBERS favor Is
his location. He lives in New York
1t may not be matter of general
knowledge that since the war the only
Democratic presidential candidate that
has not belonged to New York state is
William j. Bryan-Greeley. Seymour,
Tilden, Hancock. Cleveland three
times) and Parker. all New Workers.
Under these circumstances 1t wonld
follow as a matter of course that but
for Bryan New York would have been
favorably considered for the nominal
ton this year. and Chanler is unques-
tionably New York's candidate.
Famous For It's Politics.
And not only does Mr.. Chanler hail
from New York state, but from the
Hudson valley, which has been quite
as famous for its, politics as for its
natural scenery. Since the days of the
ALBANY regency" and before, presi-
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
General Demand

of the Well-Informed Of the World has
always been for simple, pleasant and
efficient liquid laxative remedy of known
value; laxative which physicians could
sanction for family use because its COM
ponent parts are known to them to be
wholesome and truly beneficial in effect,
acceptable to the system and gentle, yet
prompt, in action.
In supply ng that demand with its ex-
ccllent combination of Syrup of Figs and
Elixir of SIENNA, the California Fig Syrup
Co. proceeds along ethical lines and relies
on the merits of the laxative for its remark
able success.
That is one of many reasons why
Syrup of Figs and Elixir of SIENNA is given
the preference by the Well-Informed.
To get its beneficial effects always buy
the genuine-manufacturcd by the Cali
fornia Fig Syrup Co., only, and for sale
by all leading druggists. Price fifty cents
per bottle.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Worried Long OI Dishonest
Dollar,

AS the result of a woman's con-
science bothering her over a dollar
obtained dishonesty twenty years
ago, a Newark church has been ell
riched by five times that amount.
The woman, whose name Is with
held, worked in the tailoring estab-
lishment of William Kraft, in New
ark. She, with others, accepted
proposition made by a woman who
held a position of trust in the fac
tory to stand in" on the padding
of the pay roll. BY the scheme she
received 81 a week more than she
was entitled to, but half of that
amount had to go to the chief con-
spirator. She left the factory two
weeks later.
The pastor of her church advised
that she return the dollar to Kraft's
widow. 1t was refused. Mrs. Kraft
suggested the dollar and the four
more offered with it be donated to
the church.-N. Y. American.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
A LoUuaciOus Swain.

Mr.. Backwoods had called for the
first time to escort Miss pumpkin
to the weekly prayer meeting. An
excess of timldity and self-conscious-
ness reduced both to the point Of alb
solute silence until at last and with
visible effort, as the meeting house
is neared, the gallant summons all
his courage:
do you like stewed rabbit?" he
hazards.
EYES," returns the maiden, coyly.
Again silence, until on the return
journey the home lights are sighted,
when, with another nightly effort
the resourceful swain asks feelingly:
"Ain't the gravy nice?"
And yet there are those that main
tain that country folk sometimes
seem at a loss for conversational
topics.-From The Bohemian.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
JIndpSerycd HOnOrS.

Two visitors at Nice, cutting short
their stay by dying, were committed
to the charge of the same under
taker. One was lady from London.
the other a general high in command
in the Russian army. The bodies,
duly coffined, were despatched to
their destinations, one to London,
the other to st. Petersburg. On the
arrival of the former the bereaved
relatives, opening the coffin, in order
to obtain a last view of the lamented
aunt, were amazed at the discovery
of general in full uniform. They
telegraphed to the undertaken at
Nice, who, with many apologies for
the mistake, sent them the name and
address of the generals friends in
st. Petersburg. They communicated
full particulars without loss of time,
and received the following reply:
Your aunt was buried to-day with
full military honors. Dispose of the
general as you see fit. From Henry
Lucy's Memories of Eight Parlia-
nents,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
An UncOnyivial Instrument.

Whether Jan Kubelik will permit
himself to be lionized remains to be
seen. At any rate it is rather certain
that his violin will be left at home If
it's owner deigns to dine or sup or
take tea abroad. A New York woman
who has had some success as an en-
tertainer of celebrities wrote Kubelik
during his last Gotham appearance:
"Will you join us with some friends
to dine on Thursday? Bring your
VIOLIN" She was somewhat cha
grined when her messenger returned
with the reply:
Dear, Madam-My violin never
dimes. San Francisco Call.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
SOUTH AMERICA
LAND OF SAINTS.
Cruise Of Our Fleet Teaches This
as a Geographical Lesson to
Americans.
merican is q continent OF

South American Is a continent OF
Saints.
Geography has been one of the les
sons taught to us by the cruise Of
great fleet from Hampton Roads to
San Francisco, and Americans, in fol-
lowing the ships from day to day, in
the news and tracing their course on
maps, have learned more about South
America than they ever knew before.
Among the lessons taught have
been the names of places, and
strong impression has been made by
the number of times that San" Is
used as prefix to places. Sometimes
we see the prefix translated into our
Saint" but in South America the
Spanish form Is used. There are cit
places on that continent named after
saints of the Catholic Church, and
the South Europe calendar has been
nearly exhausted.
They appeared on the charts of the
fleet at every principal point on the
long journey around the continent.
Where Brazil juts into the Atlantic
the sixteen ships had to head east
ward to safely round Cape st. Rogue,
and, as the charts were studied on
the southwark voyage there were al
ways Saints in sight. Near Bahia is
San Salvador and at the harbor Bahia
de Todos os Santos, or All Saints
Bay. Below that, near Rio de jan
Giro, is Cape San Thome, and below
Montevideo is Cape San Antonio, with
the Gulf of San Matias south of that.
So it Is all the way until San Mich
olas Bay is passed through In the
Strait of Magellan. 1t Is the same
way up the west coast, Saint after
Saint, the principal ones being Cape
San Antonio, on the coast of Chile;
San Felipe, the capital Of Aconcagua,
and others not so familiar, until San
tiago Bay, on the south side Of the
Isthmus of Panama, is reached.
Santiago, derived from San Iago,
or st. James, as we would call 1t, who
is the patron saint of Spain, is natu-
rally favorite in Spanish countries,
and the name appears twenty-soven
times in the geography of South
America. San Antonio is another
favorite name, appearing in the entire
length of the continent. applied to
gulf, cape, mountain, port, province,
town and every possible place, being
repeated twenty-six timeg.
San Juan is met in every direction.
aDnearing thirty-six times, with San
Jose only little behind, being given
to thirty-two places. San Pedro
comes next, being affixed to thirty
places, and San Miguel Is used only
one time less. San Francisco Is used
twenty-five times. and other saints,
whose names are used half dozen
times or more are San Fernando, San
Diego, San Christobal and San Angus
tine.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
AS To HatDinS.

Hatpins are now regarded as trim
ming accessories and, accordingly,
are greatly priced as gifts, as they
are usually presented in pairs and
two are deemed quite enough to
decorate one hat. Among the most
effective, as well as the most serv-
iceablc, are the great globes of rhine
stones or crystal, which do not tar
ni8h after being subjected to the rain
and are greatly liked because they
harmonize with any color and serve
to brighten a dark hat. Dresden
china pins do not discolor and are
unleniable works of art, but they
must be carefully handled, while the
pins Stimulating jewels set in gold
and silver, although wonderfully fas-
chatting, are not substantial. In fact,
so readily do these mock jewels sep
arate from their settings that more
than one person has been momen-
tarily dazzlcd by the sight of pre-
cfous stone being trodden under foot.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Keeping Jars Alright.

Many housekeepers have trouble
with keeping alright anything that
is put up in jars.
II, however, after bottle or jar
Is corked, it is sealed with a mixture
Of beeswax and rosin, there is no
danger of air getting i'll.
To make this sealing mixture put
two ounces of yellow beeswax and
four ounces of rosin in small tin
pan, which is then set In a larger
pan of hot water. Stir constantly
until the wax and rosin are well
blended. Apply while still liquid to
the outside Of the corked jar or bot
tie,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Preparing For The Future

Mrs. Jenkins had missed Mrs.
Brady from her accustomed haunts,
and hearing several startling rumors
concerning her, went in search or
her old friend.
"They tell me you're workin' ard
night AN day, Sarah Anna" she
queried.
"Yes," returned Mrs. Brady. I'm
under bonds to keep the peace for
pullin the whiskers out Of that old
scoundrel of husban' of mine, and
the Magistrate said that If l come
afore i'm ag'in, or laid me 'ands on
the old man, he'd fine me 40 shil-
lin's!"
"And so you're workin' ard to
keep out of mischief?'
"I'm what? not much! I'm work
in 'ard to save up the fine."-Penny
Pictorial.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Measuring Moonlight.

A novel means of measuring moon
light is furnished by the selenium
cell, through its well-known varia-
lions of electric resistance in light
of different intensity. BY this meth
cd the light of the full moon has
been lately determined to be little
more than one-fifth CID of a stand
ard candepower and about Hisa,
times the light of the half-moon. The
gibbous disc proves to be brighter
before than after full moon. The
selenium cell is not perfectly reliable
as a test for light of varying color,
but it has been found sufficiently &C
curate and sensitive to indicate the
central phase of lunar eclipse with
in one minute of the computed time.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Meditations OF A Spinstcr.

Funny how when girl tries to
dodge a kiss she always manages SO
that 1t lands just where 1t ought to-.
Nearly every man finds wife con-
venient to be disagreeable to after
he has had to be pleasant all day
at the Office.
Nearly every man thinks he Is a
martyr when he has to give his wife
his money to run his house and feed
and clothe his children.
Any woman with experience in the
way a man makes love comes to mar
vel that not one of them ever shows
any originality or resources.-Phila-
delphia Telegraph.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
FRIENDS HELP
st, Paul Park Incident,

after drinking coffee for break
having no ambition to get to my
morning duties. Then in about an
hour or SO weak, nervous derange-
ment of the heart and stomach would
come over me with such force would
frequently have to lie down.
AT other times l had severe head
aches; stomach finally became affect
ed and digestion so impaired that
had serious chronic dyspepsia and
constipation. A lady, for many years
State President of the w. G. r. u,
told me she had been greatly bene-
fitted by quitting coffee and using Pos
tum Food Coffee; she was troubled
for years with asthma. She said it
was no cross to quit coffee when she
found she could have as delicious an
article as Postum.
Another lady, who had been trou-
bled with chronic dyspepsia for years,
found immediate relief on ceasing
coffee and beginning Postum twice a
day. She was wholly cured. Still
another friend told me that Postum
Food Coffee was godsend to her, her
heart trouble having been relieved
after leaving off coffee and taking on
Postum.
so many such cases came to my
notice that / concluded coffee was the
cause of my trouble and | quit and
pleased to say that my days of trou-
bic have disappeared. l am we'll and
happy" There's Reason" Read
1.-THE Road to MELVILLE" in pkgs.
Ever read the above letter? A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true and full of human
interest.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
BUYING PAINT BLINDLY.

Many people look upon paint buy
ing as lottery and so 1t is, the way
they do It. 1t Is not necessarily so,
however. Pure White Lead and lin
seed oil are the essential elements OF
good paint. Adulterants IN white
lead can be easily found by the use OF
a blowpipe. Authorizations in linseed
oil can be detected with a fair degree
of certainty. See that these two ele-
ments are pure and properly put on
and the paint will stay put.
National Lead Company, Wood
bridge Building, New York City, Will
send blowpipe outfit and instrnc-
lions for testing both white lead and
llnseed oil, on request.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Family OF Criminals.

A grim epitaph, perhaps unexam-
pied, is to be found in the cemetery
of Debrescin, Eastern Hungary.
1t reads as follows: Here rest
in the Lord Joseph Moritz, ST., who
died in his siXty-second year. He
was shot by his son. Frau Joseph
Moritz, who died in her forty-seventh
year. She was shot by her daughter.
Elizabeth Moritz, who died by her
own hand, in her seventeenth year,
after shooting her mother. Joseph
Moritz, who died in prison, aged
twenty-seven. He had shot his faith
or. May eternal mercy have pity on
their poor, sinful souls"
The last of this unfortunate fam
lily left q sum of 81 500 for the pur-
pose of setting up this memorial
London Globe.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Relief For Ornery Gas Engines.

Our gasolene engine started to get
ornery one day last week, but we
headed it off by little sharp prac-
tice-we just sent for Herb Red
mond. We have never studied the
innermost recesses Of the engine, yet
for the reason that it has always be-
haved in becoming manner when
we were around, so we determined
to watch Herb and see what he did.
He walked right up to it manfully
and took hold of the main condivias
that fastens the poliwog to the ding
bat and turned it gently to the left,
at the same time turning his head to
one side and listening intently. Then
he shut one eye and gave a low
whistle. There was low answering
sigh from the bosom of the machine,
whereupon he grabbed the socwal-
loper and gave 1t violent blow with
the shooting stick, and she responded
with low sibilant sound like q cat
pulling its foot out of pie. He
then put the wrench on a couple of
innocent looking little bulbs and
jerked his hand back quick. We
asked him what was the matter and
he said, "a bug on his back" and
told us to try 1t and see. We did.
1t was bug, too, lightning bug,
we take it, by the feeling. We could
see Herb had struck responsive
chord by the way the thing began to
breathe, and the look Of confidence
in Herbs eye was indicative of mo.
ton. Our prognosis was correct
one more yank at the dingbat and
she began to kapeet like thing OF
life Anyone can fix an engine by
just watching someone else fix one,
or by carefully following the above
instructions.-Brit (Iowa) Tribune
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
A Cheerful Maid.

Cheerful acceptation of ones lot Is
capitally illustrated by story found
in the National Review. Elizabeth
was the elder employe and Maud a
little serving maid, both in the house
hold of bachelor clergyman. The
absences of Elizabeth were frequent
and prolonged. Maud was always on
hand. One Sunday morning she
brought in breakfast.
You again to-day, Maud?" said
the clergyman. ,. .......
my Sunday out" explained Maud,
with smile.
"Then why aren't you out?"
please, sir" with another smile,
VIXEN tbs my Sunday out, Elizabeth
goes"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Not Knocking Anybody.

Lawyer - The defendant in this
case is a lazy, worthless fellow, isn't
he?
Witness-Well, sir, don't want
to do the man any injustice. l won't
go so far as to say he's lazy, but
If 1t required any voluntary work
on his part to digest his victuals he
would have died of lack of nourish-
ment Is years ago.--Chicago Trib-
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Excuses.

"Cabby, make your horse go lit
tie quicker"
"Impossble; | am a member of
the Society for the Protection of Ami
mails"
Ten Minutes Later Con arrivaD-
Give me q little extra tip"
"lmpossible; | am a member of
the Temperance Society. Les An
males, Paris.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
HOW's This?

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward
for any case of Catarrh that cannot be
cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
ID. CHENEY & Co., Toledo. D.
We, the undersigned, have known F. }
Cheney for the last Is years, and believe
him perfectly honorable in all business
transactions and financially able to carry
out any obligations made by his firm,
WALDING, KfNNAN 4 MARVIN, Whole
sale Druggists, Toledo, o:
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally, act
ing directly upon the blood and mucuoussur
faces of the system. Testimonials sent free
Price, tic. per hottie. Sold by all Druggists
Take Halls Family Pills for constipation
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Wicked Lad,

"What was the school lesson, little
boy?" asked the kind old gentleman
by the roadside.
Climb" chirped the small boy
with bullying pockets. That's all,
Climb"
"Ah! And l hope you will take
advantage Of it,"
ALREADY taken advantage OF 1t,
sir. Climbed every tree by the road
side in search of birds eggs. Chs
CagO News.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
FIFTEEN YEARS OF SUFFERING.
Burning, Painful Sores on Legs--Tor-
tured Day and Night-Tried Many
Remedies to No Avail-Used
Cufirura. Is We'll Again.

"After an attack of rheumatism, running
sores broke out on my husbands legs, from
below the knees to the ankles. There are
no words to tell all the discomfort and
great suffering he had to endure night and
day. He used every kind Of remedy and
three physicians treated him, one after the
other, without any good results whatever.
One day ordered some Cuticura Soap,
Cuticura Ointment, and Cuticura Resol-
vent. He began to use them and in three
weeks all the sores were dried up. The
burning fire stopped, and the pains became
bearablc. After three months he was quite
well. / can prove this testimonial at any
time. Mrs. V. V. Albert, Upper French
vile, Me-, July 81, 1907
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
Author And Manager.

"Yes, your play pleascs me. |
will produce it; but don't intend
to run any risks of misunderstand-
ing. Please sign this paper author
izing me to rewrite the dialogue in
troduce another set of characters,
and change the name!"-Le Rira.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

Uninjured mammoth remains are
among the vast natural resources OF
Siberia awaiting exploitation. For
commercial purpose the skeletons are
more valuable than the best Indian
ivory
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07
HIS RIDICULOUS CLAIM.

$50 you claim to possess the heart
of boy? BAH"
But, really, I feel just as young
as / ever did"
go, on. The fire engines went
past here five minutes ago, and you
were so busy reading some of Emer-
sons essays that you never knew it..
Chicago Reoord-Herald..
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

hand above my head. The doctor
held out no hope Of my recovery and
/ had given up, but at last started
using Doan's Kidney Pills and made
n rapid gain. After three months
use was we'll and at work again."
Sold by all dealers. sc cents box.
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo. N. Y.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

According to figures printed In a
Toronto journal, transmitted by
Consul r. S. Chiffon, Jr., of that
city, the foreign trade of Canada for
the II months ended February 20,
1908, amounted to $5S9, 755,974, an
increase over the same months of
1867 of $30,156,704.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

invalid with kidney
troubles and often
wished death might
end my awful suffer-
ings. The secretions
were thick with sedi-
me1t, my limbs swol-
len and my right side
so nearly paralyzed |
could not raise my
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

Consul Frank w. Mann, of Not
tingham, reports that the coal out
put of that part of England in 1907
increased 100000 tons over 1906
-one-fourth of the total increase in
the entire kingdom.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

Hicks Capudinc Cures Womcn's
Monthly Pains, Backache, Nervousness.
and Headache. It's Liquid. Effects mme-
da,cly. Prescribed by physicians with best
results. l0c., 25c, and soc. at drug stores.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-05-07

FITS, st. vitus'D Dance: Nervous Diseases per.
manently cured by DR.. Klines Great Nerve
Restorer. Sc trial bottle and treatise free.
Dr. II. r. Kline. Id. 1881 Arch ST., Phiia., Pa.