davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
HU7AOp or THE DAY

trust.
sausage would be mpossible.-Chicago
News.
New Clerk-I should like two weeks va
Boss-'what! Why. this is only your first
week with us.
New Cierk-Yes. sir; but once get ac-
customed to the position 1 may be able
to stand it longer.-Judge.
Proprietor-How much are you selling
those stockings for?
Saleslady-Ten cents pair
Proprietor (absently)-They won't last
long at that price-Brooklyn Eagle.
Were you much touched by the sermon
WELL might have been. but it hap
pened that had only a little loose change
with me. "-Philadephfa Ledger.
PA. what's an infidel?''
"a man who has never had reason as
yet to believe his time had come."-Chi-
cago Record-Herald.
so that great inventor is dead and his
wonderful secret is lost"
before he died"
yes. that's what I mean."-Philadel-
phia Press.
What do you do in case of fire?"
them the the hoasd has
They do SO enjoy playing on ruins
Life.
Mr.. Bach-I have my doubts about this
idea that the more you give away the
more you have
Mr. Phamleigh-No question at al about
it. 1 gave way my daughter two months
ago and now she's returned with her hus-
band Esi,7 tb1 q
soakington-I think am a good Judge
of whisky.
The Rev John-Oh, no. you are not a
judge-you are an advocate at the bar
Illustrated Bits.
won't you sing something for me, MISS
Bored?" asked the late slayer.
II can't do 1t now, she yawneo, De-
cause I'm su2erstitious.
What do you mean?
"Well, I've always been told 1t was I'M
| lucky to sing before breakfast."-Cleve-
| land Leader.
whats to be done when child swal-
| lows cent, doctor?'
| make the parents cough UP two dol
| lars!'-Yonkers Statesman
Mrs Buutinski--Did you ever catch your
husband flirting?
Mrs. De Swift-Sure thing. That's how
I did catch him.
He-won't you miss me when I'm far
away?
very close..Cornell Widow.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

low it's use by larger vessels than
were provided for at first.
AS for the Suez canal there also
the traffic has gone on increasing un-
til last years report shows that the
receipts amounted to over $4,000
900, of which it is said that more
than three-fifths were a clear profit.
Even II the Panama canal yields no
profit in cash, it will be of immense
value in other ways to this country;
but. as 1t will be, like the Suez water
way, highway of travel for the
accommodation of the entire world,
there need be no doubt that 1t will
ultimately be source of great
revenue to the government.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

lose a minutes time in making this
answer the correct one. This railroad
VIII be great boon to all the business
interests of the city. If it is construct
ed. 1t will open up an unusually rich
and fertile territory that is now un-
tapped by railroad of any kind. The
business men of Topeka have ever
proved themselves a mighty liberal lot
when 1t comes to digging down in
their pockets for anything that will
benefit the city. That they will meet
the present emergency there can be
no good reason for doubt. The money
they put into this project will not be
in the nature of contribution. 1t will
be an investment from which good re-
turns should be received
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

Are the primaries to be held in
Kansas and Missouri on August to
be the Swan songs" of the profess
sional politicians and their machines?
This is one of the interesting questions
soon to be determined. That's what
the primaries were intended for. But
a real rub comes even If those politi-
clans who have been allied with the
machines" of the past are defeated.
The victors. in this event. will be men
who are already conceded to be poll
ticians of more or less note, and the
likelihood is that they will at once get
busy and build. up machines of their
own. So it will be a case. rather. of
jumping out of the frying pan into the
fire, no matter which way these pri-
maries go.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
PREPARING FOR CANAL TRADE.

Great expectations, but not so great
that they are unlikely to be realized.
are harbored by some trade localities
of the Pacific coast region as the re-
suit of the building of the Panama
canal
Referring to this. the Army and
Navy Journal notes that in an address
before the Seattle Commercial club
on June so. ]. T. Flynn, inventor of
the Flynn system of concrete sea
walls. who has just prepared harbor
plans for the city of Oakland, Cal, to
cost $17,000,000, recommended the
holding of a convention in Seattle in
the near future for the purpose of
formulating plans for the improve
ment of all the harbors and water
ways of the state of Washington in
preparation for the large increase in
commerce which must follow the
completion of the canal.
1t does not appear that Seattle, or
the state 1t is in has adopted the
recommendation up to the present:
but it is not improbable that they are
both thinking it over, because it is q
fair conclusion that If the trade and
COIIitucICo VI OIlC PldC0 Oil thC
cifc coast are largely increased by
reason of the increased facilities
which the canal will offer, the bust
ness of all others will be benefited.
in the same way, provided they pre-
pare for it by an improvement in
their own facilities.
AS a matter of fact, the state of
California, says the Army and Navy
Journal, has asked Mr. Flynn for sea-
wall plans involving the expenditure
of $12,500,000 for use at the Golden
Gate, and other improvements are
projected. And the general feeling
along the Pacific coast is that there
is not time to lose If the proper
advantage is to be taken of the pros
perity which seems sure to come from
the canal.
That this is a sensible view of the
prospect spread before them by the
work going forward on the Isthmus.
is shown. in fact, by the history of
what has been accomplished during
the last decade or two by the con-
struction of the right kind of canals
in various places; and notably the
one from Manchester, England, to
blNeTpOOi, tHlIty-liNc ana One-n dlI
mile waterway now 2s feet deep on
which between s75.000,000 and $780,
900, 900 have been expended from its
| beginning in 1898; and the Suez canal
from the Mediterranean to the Red
sea, which, 90 miles long and 81 feet
deep, cost s1o0.ooo.ooO to construct,
! and has cost great deal since for re-
pairs and improvements.
There are no figures at hand to
| show what percentage of profit on
| the investment is received from the
Manchester canal; but that it has in
creased the trade and commerce OF
| Manchester and the adjacent terri
| tory is made manifest by the fact that
to accommodate that increase, the
directors of the enterprise found II
| necessary to increase the depth from
the original. 26 feet to so as to all
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

The CRATER in public office might
appropriately be called a political
horticulturist.
A man becomes we'll nigh in
tolerable when he insists on telling
what a mice" family he comes from.
y
It's hardly ever proper to apply the
old saying ''the good die young to
the average chicken that's served up.
X
Poker and the social game are a
good deal alike in that person
calls" to see what the other persons
got.
Information of mans engage
ment to an heiress is generally first
conveyed to his intimate creditors.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
HEREs A SAD sroRY.

lately bought a summer suit,
The clerk, a person most astute,
Declared that 1t was stunning
The cut was strictly up-to-date,
The tit, thought. was simply great,
The pocket flaps were cunning.
went to call on Mary, dear.
I said: Il certainly appear
As fine as anybody"
The finish recall with pain
It presently came on to rain
shelter sought, and sought in vain.
Alasi Those clothes were shoddy.
They shrunk to half their former size.
My anguish ] could not disguise.
And now, for that bad raiment
That looked SO swagger and so smart.
Although 1t wrings my very heart
For months I'll have to set apart
To make the weekly payment
Chicago News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
FULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
HOME NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers Of the State Journal
away during the summer may hav,
the paper mailed regularly each day
Go any address Mt the rate OF ten cents
week or thirty cents q month (by
mail only.) Address changed as often
as desired. While out OF town the
State Journal win be to you like q
daily letter from home.
Advance payment Is requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
bookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

Probably the candidates for the
more important Republican nominal
lions in the state which are to be de-
termined by the people on August A,
have done each other all sorts of in
justices during the heat of the cam
paign- If they haven't. the average
individual might well think that all
of them are a pretty bad lot.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

ably Just bristle with editorial encom-
iums and elegant eulogies for the
vice presidential candidate of the In
dependence party, Colonel John Tenn
pie Graves. Mr.. Graves is employed
by Mr.. Hearst as an editorial writer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

A new company is being organized
in Kansas City to build interurban
lines of railroads in the eastern sec
tions of this state. What is needed
more than new companies with such
objects in view is some real activity
on the part of existing companies
that were organized to do this very
thing. There are already an over
abundance of paper railroads in Kan
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

Think of the wisdom that was need
ed by the weather sharps to draw the
conclusion that the lack of breezes
during the past couple of days was
one of the causes that the heat was
felt so much.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.
IFrom the New York Press.1

From the New York Press.1
An honest thing about girl with
red hair is when it's natural.
very neat trick a woman has is
never to cry when she means It.
1t appears like most married people
spent their lives wondering why they
did it.
The more times a man swears off
in week the more will power he
thinks he has to do it.
i When girl has pretty dimples in
her arms she's not 50 very much
afraid Of Gstttnx them sunburned.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

It all depends on whether a man is
a Democrat or a Republican as to
which injunction plank in the plat
forms of each of the parties he thinks
is vague and ambiguous" or "clear
and uneuuiyocal"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

An uprising IN Portugal has been
nipped in the bud. But these are the
kind of blooms that kings and queens
would just as soon not be compelled
70 pluck
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

There's little cause for wonder that
Mr. Roosevelt heartily approved of
Mr.. Taft's speech Of acceptance in to-
to. It's the strongest endorsement of
the president and his policies that has
yet been delivered by anyone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

Next in order for It's appearance in
the political armament is Mr.. Bryan's
speech accepting the Democratic
nomination. He will undoubtedly
prove. to his own satisfaction at least,
that Mr.. Taft's ideas on the various
issues of the campaign are all wrong.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

When the race of 1908 for the
presidency has been run Hisgen and
Graves, the candidates OF the Indepen-
dence party, will be among the also
rams. of which there will be quite a
more or less distinguished company.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

ais 1t possible that the business men
of a city of the size of Topeka are
going TO lose this railroad for the want
of the picayunish sum of 100000"
tersely and pertinently asks c. X. Hol-
liday. the president of the Topeka
southwestern Railway company. He
answers in the negative. And the
business men OF the city. should-not
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

The Englishmen who conducted the
Olympic games are felicitating each
other on the manner in which the
sports were managed.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30

There appears to be the right sort
of justice in the decision of the inter-
state commerce commission to the eff
feet that small shippers may join
shipments and get the same rates as
are accorded to the large shippers.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-07-30
The Dangerous Welsh Rabbit.

husband arrested for remarking in his
sleep that he loved Cfssy. The wife's
name happened to be Florence; hence
the legal proceedings. On his part
defendant testified that he had con-
sumed a Welsh rabbit the preceding
evening and could not be held respon-
sible for incoherent statements due
directly to the rabbit. A perfectly
sound position. We are surprised that
the Judge did not sustain 1t. A man
under the influence of Welsh rabbit IS
apt to say anything. He is likely to
call, not only upon the name of Cissy.
but upon Belial and Michael. upon the
archangels and the demons of the
neither world. We must say that we
are surprised at the judge.-Balttmore
News, -z.s
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14

= PRACTICAL FARM NOTES. !
4 =
GROWING AIEAIEA.

Many farmers in this section have In
recent years made successful expert
ments in alfalfa growing. and the crop
is n which promises to gain rapidly
in popularity here as 1t has in the
South and West. For this crop, as q
rule. a sandy loan is the best. but 1t
will ais thrive well on land having
clay subsoil. AS @ rule alfalfa win nor
do we'll on heavy. g~unbo-clay until "
has been cultivated for several years as
q sort Of civilizing process. In the
growing of alfalfa one seeding is good
for a period of 10 years If the catch
on all right nj makes a good
even stand from tho beginning. In
average seasons and on ordinary land
two tons Of hay can be cut to the acre.
All farmers Know how much 1t costs
to put up hay. The second crop will
bring from three to five bushels Of
seed. which sells as q rule for IS or
IS a bushel. Then there is the chaff
from which the seed is threshed. which
Is also worth something. The expenses
OF harvesting n threshing the alfalfa
seed crop are hardly one-half that Of
wheat. In the growing Of grain the
land has to be plowed, narrowed and
planted for every crop and to be sue
cessful the land should be dry-cropped
only every other year. Thirty to IS
bushels OF wheat the acre is a very
good yield for summer fahowed dry
land The price of wheat averages
about IS cents a bushel for a period OF
five years. 1t will be seen from these
figures that the growing of alfalfa il
the more profitable for dry land wher-
ever 1t a be grown successfully.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
70 GET BEST RESULTS.

With most COWS the highest Yield Of
milk INT butterfat for the year must
be obtained by having them go dry
from six to eight weeks before calvinS.
1t is frequently the case with high
producing COWS that II milking is con-
tinued to h time Of calving the milk
OF the last six or eight weeks often
bad flavor and odor. It be-
comes more difficult to churn owing
to the small fat globules and the Wis
costly of the milk and will injure the
butter made from any milk with which
1t is mixed. 1t is profitable to dry up
q COW on this account as well as for
tho effect on the others. Rest does
not seem SC essential for COWS giving
Tow milk In butterfat and it is i'm
possible to dry nan heavy yielders
der. In such cases the only reasonable
plan Is continuous milking, out II too
much difficulty is not experienced in
drying up this class Of cows it should
be done. as better result will be Sc
cured. To dry up a COW. reduce the
feed gradually, especially by taking
away the grain. and when the milk
yield drops, milk first once a day, then
once in two days n In one or two
and her udder in good condition. H
a COW continues to give milk under
this treatment or If the udder is hard
and feverish the work of drying up
must stop and the foo be changed
to a light milk ration with %loosening
feeds n the COW MIXED regularly.
Forced drying up under these condl-
ions Injuries the COW. II by over
sight the drying up process has been
weeks Of calving time do not at
tempt IL.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
WHAT OTHER couMTR,Es DO.

1t mag be interesting to our western
farmers who know how to pull off big
crops to carr something about tho
yields Of wheat in the different sections
of the world. The mean average yield
IN European Russia is 8.8 bushels an
acre; In the United States 1873 bushels:
in the United Kingdom, 35.4 bushels;
20.1 bushels: in Canada. 1876 bushelsy
In Argentina, 10 bushels; in British Inc
dia, 1O.5 bushels. Until British India
and Argentina are growing lager
crops than this the farmers in the
United States and Canada need not
greatly fear competition from these
sources. There was a time The Eng
land grew but IS bushels an acre. Bet
ter farming would raise h yield OF
wheat In the United States in the same
proportion.
The people out In this country can
scarcely comprehend what the turmoil
in the calf crop from the big dairy Sec
lions down cast means. Just as soon
as the calves arr in good Matchmaking
condition they are hiked off to mar
ket. Last April 62,759 Of these calves
went onto the Chicago market while
during the year 100000 of them were
slaughtered. for which the dairy farm
ers received an average price OF $6.40
per hundred weight. In early spring
light and bobby calves are plentiful a.
a great many OF hem are condemned
as unfit for food. Losses suffered by
shippers are therefore OF heavy volume.
getting the marketable calves at prices
low enough to Offset any losses which
might be suffered through the con-
demnation Of some purchases Of the
liGhtea weight lots and therefore val
ues for all kinds suffer accordingly.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
A Fool in Company.

from llt-BltS.
Shortly after 2 O'Clock one bitter win
ter morning a physician drove four
miles in answer to a telephone call. On
his arrival the mar who had INC
him said:
Doctor. 1 amt in any particular
pain, but somehow or other I've got a
feeling that death is nigh"
The doctor felt the mans pulse and
listened to his heart. Have you made
your Willy" he asked. finally
The mar turned pale. why, no, doc
tor. AT my age-oh. doc, it amt true.
IS it? 1t can't be true"
Who's your lawyer"
"Hfgginbotham; cut"
"Then you'd better send for him at
once"
The patient. white and trembling.
went to the telephone.
who's your p~astor?" continued the
doctor.
~Rev. Kellogg NJ. Brown" mumb,ed
the patient. "But doctor, do You
Send for him Immediately. Your
father. too. should be summoned, also
Say. doctor, do you really think I'm
going to die?' The man began to blub-
Der softly.
The doctor looked at him hard. "No,
I DON'T" he replied. There's nothing
at all the matter with you. But hate
to be the only nan you've made a fool
Of on a bitterly cold morning IKE
this"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
Close Quarters.

From Magazine.
Any one who has ever Travelled on
the New York subway in rush hours
can easily appreciate the following:
"A lit lie man. wedged into the middle
OF a car, suddenly thought of pick.
pockets. II quite as suddenly re1nem-
bered that he had some money in his
overcoat. He plunged his hand into his
pocket and was somewhat shocked
upon encountering the fist of a fat fell
low passenger.
ANA" snorted the latter. 81 caught
TSou that time!"
"Leggo!" snarled the little man.
Lego my hand!"
~.Pickpocket!" Kissed the fat man,
~Sroundrel!" retorted the little one.
just her a tall man In their vicini+
glanced up from his paper.
I'd like to get off here" he drawled.
IT you fellows don't mind taking your
hands OUT Of my pocket"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
P VI
yENGEANCE

It strikes a chill through me, even
yet, to recall the awful horror Of that
instant. The fer-de-lance-death in a
few heart beats. and such a DEATH
a death that melts a man into an
abominaiion! For a moment, none of
us dared move. scarcely dared breathe,
and I saw the band Of light from SIM
mond's lantern waving uncertainty
across h floor, the walls. the ceiling
evidently poor Simmonds did not UNI
derstand the nature of the dam
ger. but only that it was a terrible
One. I had a mad impulse to jump.
~shiieklng. for the door. n should
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
A French Bull.
From Modern Sncinty

FTOm WOuern Society.
'"They thought more of the Legion Of
Honor IN the time of Napoleon 4. thaM
they do now said a well-known French
man. THE emperor one day met an old
one-armed veteran.
"'Iiew did yeu lose YOU arm?' he asked.
".Sire, at Austerlitz.'
"'And were you not decorated?'
Ono. SIRE
Then here is my own cross for you,
l make you c~hevafter!'
"'fosr majesty na1res me chevalier be-
cause l have lost one arm! What woui,1
your majesty have done had l lost bod,
arms2'
"'Oh, in that case 1 should have mada
you officer of the Legion!
"Whereupon the old soldier immediatclv
drew hts sword and cut off his other ar,n,S
There is no particular reason to denah
this story. The only question Is, how did
he do it?
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
A Jonier.

A Jotiier.
Mayor Douglass. of Niagara Falls
said the other day Of an ONCE seeker.
"I4e is a jollier. He reminds me Of s
chicken thief Of Utica.
"a police reporter wrote Of this thief
a.The prisoner laushed aloud for mercy.
And when the night editor asked for an
iexpaanation Of that queer sentence. tbs
1rtisorter said:
It's exactly what happened. Every
y old fesbls joke the magistrate
naads. the scoundrealy thief Dared nt
20 split Ets staes.'"
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
EARN FACTS.

1t is time to overhaul the tanning
mill or buy a new one. Select a grad
ing sieve that will discard all small
and s%hriveled grains. Then go to work
to clean up enough grain for the spring
seeding which will be on now before
we know 1t. If the time spent In do
ing SO is not repaid in a big crop
charge all to me. I would much rather
attempt to try to get along without a
harvester than a flaming mill. Double
up the work Of h harvester by keep
Ing the mill busy at seeding time
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14

Do not buy axle in the small
nickel and quarter boxes and patis, but
set it in h 25-pound pals. We have
boon buying 1t SO for the last five years
and find 1t costs less than half as much.
The %35-pound pail costs something over
a dollar. This many pounds. bought
in the small packages, would cost $3.50
and it would take about thirty Of the
supposed pounds to maxi twenty five
actual ones.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14
Tamperina W1ith Iruth.

dH3PoTlU3 WIFI 1TUIts
A school teacher trying to explain to
his class the meaning Of the word ..con-
ceited,' said:
Suppose I would go around saying,
Look how good I am to my class or
Dragging about how much I know, or
how good looking l atl-what would
you say I WASP"
"a liar" instantly responded the
class,
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-02-14

William R. Smith. q Scotchman by
birth. is about to complete his 5oth
year as superintendent Of the botanical
garden in Washington. He says he has
served the federal government in the
same position longer than any other
of it's employees.