The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1908-05-23


forward TO it as a part and parcel Of
the seasons programme.
There has been a murder commit
ted in city, village or out In the
country, and the murderer has got
away. The murder may have been
for revenge, robbery, jealousy or what
not The first thing the police do, fail
Ing to find the guilty party within a
few hours, is to lay the crime to
tr1mps. Their own records would
show them that the tramp class is
more clear of capital crimes than al.
most any other, and yet the first in.
stinct is to go for it. The call goes
forth In city and village to round II
up, and country constables for fifty
miles around are warned to be on the
lockout.
J am plodding along a country high
way or taking nap under a tree be-
aide the road when the heavy hand of
the law is laid upon me. The constable
may have five or six men at his back,
all armed and all regarding me as
most desperate character. / am bound
hand and foot. There is much rejoic-
ing. The constable feels that he will
De- nominated for sheriff next time,
and those with him know they will be
regarded as heroes for some time to
rome. I am told that l am red
handed murderer and that if SO much
as raise finger shall have my brains
blown into the next county.
The procession heads for the county
Jail and makes triumphal entry into
tie town. Everybody turns out to see
and to ask questions. The constable
and his assistants are almost carried
zruund on the shoulders of the mob. A
boom sets in, and real estate jumps %
per cent 1t is hours before the excite.
ntent abates. The telephone and the
telegraph spread the news all over the
g0Intry that the murderer has been ar
BeSted,. and the jailer wouldn't trade
places with the president of the Unit
ed States.
10f course there is a mob of newspa-
per men, and Of course l am pictured
and described as a villain and all that.
Our reporter may not even get in to
nee me, but that makes no difference
Bith his writing two or three columns
about the affair and giving my per-
Eonal description. People are let in to
gaze on wild beast Not a man has
The slightest doubt that am guilty.
IF l have been captured for a mur-
der outside the county l am taken
away after three or four days. If it is
IN the county l am kept in Jail until
the examination comes off. In either
event live like a fighting cock. The
officials all defer to me. | get extras
With my meals for being murderer.
I get cigars for being hero. Ministers
call to see me, and now and then
bouquet comes in. | am informed by
the detectives and others that they
have got straight case against me
and then advised to own up and throw
myself on the mercy of the court.
That's where the laugh comes in.
One of Two Things Sure to Happen.
'In the course of a week one of two
things is sure to happen. The officers
fither get the right clew and | am set
at liberty or I am arraigned for exam
1nation. In the former case the sheriff
aomes to my cell and calls out:
" "Here, you miserable old tramp, get
cut Of thisr
"'What for?'
because say so. You are dis
charged from custody. Why in the
devil didn't you say you weren't
guiltyY
But did,
Don't lie to me! Get out of this
Jail! A nice mess you have made Of
It! People are calling me the biggest
ass In the state! Get hump on your
selfv
@And tp-n -nn-- a. IN Ohio 4oii