Wausau pilot. [volume] (Wausau, Wis.) 1896-1940, 1908-03-31

All women are cats, says an Ohio
| judge. Net all there are some kittens.
New York American.
The undertaken takes lively inter
est in people who are dead in earnest.
Philadelphia Bulletin.
A nature faker is fair creature
who wears rabbit FAR boa with an
ermine air.-Dallas News.
According to the market reports,
money is easy" but the men who have
1t are Washington Post
The more we see of the simplified
spoilers the better we like Webster's
Dictionary Washington Post.
With billion dollars in gold in the
Treasury the Government is prosper
Gus, anyway.-Philadelph Press.
1t appears to be nearly as costly for
an American girl to Divorce title as
to marry one.-St Louis Dispatch.
Talk of war between Russia and
Turkey serves to recall the fact that
both are bankrupt.-Ne York World
There is one extra day in this year.
and it is a Presidential campaign year,
too. That's hard luck. Washington
Eerald
A mouse has been taught to do the
merry Widow waltz. A mouse can
make any kind of widow waltz.-New
York American
The girl who gess married during
leap year must be very beautiful in
order to escape suspicion. Chicago
RecordHeraId.
What was once the Confederate
States of America may De within few
years the Prohibition State of Amer
ica.-Arkansas Gazette.
1t is more blessed to give than to re-
ceive was written before the day-or
rather the heydayof the bank re-
ceiver-New York Tribune
The habit of keeping something in
the house "for medicinal purposes"
promises to become general in this
country Washington Post.
Maniac-depressive insanity is new.
anyhow, and presents an aspect of dig
nifty that was lacking in the Brain
storm.-Philadelphi Ledger
Scientists claim to have discovered
the murder germ in hard cider. The
suicide germ was long ago discovered
in hard Observation-Disclosures Post.
If those Kentucky might riders"
don't stop burning tobacco we shall all
be compelled to smoke cabbage leaves
very soon.--Philadelphi Inquirer.
A California Judge has just decided
that man doesn't have to get out OF
the way of an automobile; but the man
knows better.-Philadelph Press.
People who kill themselves by reason
of being out of work should reflect that
| this course does not make things easier
for their families. Philadelphia Led
ger.
People of Black Hand proclNities
! have threatened to blow up Uncle
Sam. In this is hint for him to get
personally interested. = Philadelphia
Ledger.
January imports of $S5.000,000; Jan
uary exports OF $2O6,000,O00-the way
this country can both hustle and econ
omize when it has to is Il caution =
New York World
what has become of the old-fash
! toned father?" asks an exchange. lie
is being kept busy paying the bills OF
his new-fashioned children, we under
stand.-Washington Post.
The Pittsburg engineer who has sued
! to collect a fee of $494 103 for year;
services appears to have mistaken his
vocation He should be q trust com
pany receiver-New York World
New York policemen are studying
foreign languages. Now if the IL and
subway guards would only learn to
speak English, the world would seem
little brighter.-New York Herald.
interpreters at Ellis Island cannot dis
cover the nationality of new arrival
who talks a language they never heard
before Has a baseball enthusiast tried
to hold converse with the stranger
Chicago News.
Dr. Henry T. Stedman, of the Har
ward Medical School, insists that in
sanity is not increasing and explains
that ''there are more mental conditions:
today than formerly that are consid,
cred insanity So it seems.-Spring
field Union.
Secretary Cortelyou estimates that
the money boarded in the OctoberNo
vember panic amounts to $296, 125, 100
about one-tenth of the total circulation
On the average, then, nine bank depos
itors out of ten kept their heads in the
recent crisis--New York Tribune.
1t is a little hard apon sentimental
lists that the first thing said by the res
cued miners who had been buried fol
46 days was. "Give us a chew of tobac
co." No vaudeville offers for them
Philadelphia Inquirer.
During the two decades in witch
General Coxey has been leading the
army of the unemployed, it was the de
serters who got the Jobs. But, like al
good and great men, he knows enough
of the weakr SIS of human nature tc
forgive them.-St. Louis Republic.
Canadian manufacturers have appealed
TO Ottawa to prevent all American ma
terials being used in the construction OF
the Detroit tunnel. More particularly do
they take exception to American cement
ood staaI hein0 i,sed in fha thraa ouortars