davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

and runs a private wireless station, is
going around with his hand to his brow,
demanding to know-"Why is a goldfish
Mr.. Woods. who has a mind of such de-
ductive and analytical powers as to make
Sherlock Holmes resemble come-on by
comparison, discovered that his wireless
apparatus always worked better when the
ground was damp, following rain. so
he had constructed little pond, through
which he ran the ground wires Of his ap-
paratus, and into the pond he put lot of
little goldfish, more as forlorn hope
than anything else. for he was pretty
well convinced that the first time his big
spark got to jumping and the heavy cur
rent waltzed up and down the ground
wire through the pool he would have some
of the deadest goldfish in these parts on
his hands.
But nothing of the sort happened. In
stead. the goldfish seemed to thrive on the
current. They began to show at a rate
never before remarked in tish-gold. sill
yer or otherwiSe-and, in few weeks
they were the talk of Capitol Hill. One
tlree-tailed fish of the Japanese variety.
which was a little bigger than a minnoW
when Mr. Wood put it in the pool, now
weighs three pounds and a half ana
another. which was already of good size
when it began to take the electric treat
ment, has been shipped to the fish COM
mission as a curiosity. 1t grew until 1t
was too long to turn around In the
pond Several government experts are
now puzzling their heads over the propo-
sition. but they can't figure 1t out.
Go I'm and ask the genius of the Capitol
to show you his wireless-fed goldfish.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

drearily, that VIC, as "A people, didn
really know how to celebrate? That We
didn't have enough of the divvie In US to
be really and truly celebrators, and all
similar?
Well they're turning around now to
these piffiins persons and saying that
We are too ALFRED celebratish, so to
speak. They are saying 1t in New York.
at any rate and in good sooth TO give
unto them that which appertains and is
coming to them they have the right to
say that same.
Meaning that the New Workers sure have
grabbed at every reasonable and unrea-
sonabIe chance. during the past decade or
so. to set up a carnival spirit what is.
ANY little old thing these days will serve
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

They merely watched US across the
clearings and through the trees and never
even popped at US They probably figured
that 1t would be no use. seeing how great
ly We outnumbered them.
lone morning Gen. Fitzpatrick sent for
me to learn how I was making out with
the destruction of the railroad He want
ed the work pushed forward faster.
I'll tell you what you do Gen Kill
patrick said to me. The boys always
work faster and with better will when
there's music around. You take one of
the mounted bands down to where the
gang is working and give EN- some
music. Thatll chirk 'em up and we can
get the job done sooner
so / took mounted band to the point
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

side his friend until the street piano had
gone away down the avenue out of hear
ing.
He didn't make any explanation when
he resumed the lawn seat, either But
his crony was curious.
''Old boy he said to the retired gem
eral, II never knew before that you were
narrow and prejudiced There's none of
the old soreness left in you. is there. that
you run away from Dixie? Don't you
know that Dixie is unanimously ap-
plauded by all hands nowadays when it's
played by theater orchestras In New
York for instance, and even in Boston,"
"Oh that's all right, too calmly re-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

were supposed to be sitting up nights
with the initiative and referendum and
neglecting their farm chores to discuss
the guaranty of bank deposits and the
liberty of the Filipinos. Only once did l
see a political poster, and that was pasted
over a busted window In a barber shop
in a town of 300 inhabitants. The only
time l heard politics mentioned. as l al
ready have said. was in another little
town, where the hotel proprietor and the
rural mail carrier were having hot ar
sument as to whether Mr.. Taft's first
name was Serene or John.
Naturally" said the local pluto, in
conclusion, Il didn't expect that the vote
for the national ticket would be very
large. Since inspecting the totals l have
come to the conclusion that all the people
had their minds made up and considered
it a waste Of time to get busy with the
iniammatory issues of the day.
THE Honorable Prunella Heron, who
lives up on Mount Pleasant, and who
considers the privilege of smoking cigar
on the rear platform of a 18th street car
while on his way TO work o mornings as
an awful jolt one day this week. He hop
ped on one of those big yellow cars with a
recently lighted near-Havana at rakish
angle in his countenarice, when the con-
ductor came hustling out and spoke
harshly to him.
"Douse the cabba gio." said he or words
to that effect. There's nothing doing in
the smoke-stick line no more at all. So
many skirts have kicked about the brand
of Turkish rugs smoked by you people up
on the hill that the company has issued an
order cutting it out. There it is pasted
on the window"
The Honorable Prunella read the notice.
swore his favorite For the love OF
Georgetown oath. removed pair OF
manicure scissors from his vest pocket.
cut the end from the cigar. put the per-
fectly good remainder in his pocket and
stood aside to sec some other smokers get
the hook. 1t was fun. Some of them
took it good-naturedly. but most of them
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

piled the old officer I'm neither preju-
diced nor narrow-nobody less so. But I
got heap the worst of that Dixie tune
little matter of forty and odd years
ago, SO that I've never been able to listen
to Dixie since without becoming-wel,
sort of restless.
mo particular reason why l shouldn' t
tell you about it. When Gen. Fitzpatrick
was operating down around Macon, tear
ing up railroads and such like. I was with
him. l had charge of destroying the
tracks.
plain sight. but they didn't bother us any.
They contented themselves with falling
back we progressed with the pulling up
of the ties and rails
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

didn't. Three or four considered the con.
ductor at fault and offered TO beat him
up il he'd step off the car. But IL re-
NAMED for an old bug. a we'll preserved
citizen. with long cigar in his face and
an intellectual CLEAN in his eye, to solve
the problem.
He was plumb Disguised by the order.
He read the notice and reread it and read
1t again. Then he threw away his cigar,
probably not having a pair Of scissors
handy, as did the thoughtful Prunella,
and sighed
Say said he TO the rest of the smoke
less platform bunch. Il tell you what
lets do.
Let's hire hack stick our feet out OF
the windows and smoke ourselves 10
death"
The bunch is now thinking il over.
REPRESENTATIVE NATHAN HALH
~ of the second Tennessee district evil
IDENTIFY is exceedingly popular in Wash
ington. Fully half hundred people called
me up at different times election night to
ask for the returns from his district And
when. in each case l replied. 1T looks
would hear strange sounds from the other
end of the wire. At first l thought they
were cries of unrestrained joy and pride
and exultation until my straining ear
caught the sweet euphony of an emphatic
sandwiched damn. When the next man
called up on the same quest l was pre-
pared.
Tell me-" I whispered over the wire.
why is 1t that people swear when they
hear the returns from the second Ten
nessee?'
There was long silence. thought the
questioned person had left the phone.
But then came the answer
Il guess said the man at the other
end in hesitating and strangled tone.
Il guess it must make EN- mad to think
that any one dare vote against Nathan
Hale
OF course, that may be the reason. Also
it may not.
IRVING c. NORWOOD
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

perfect strangers on the back and poke
those feathery contraptions called tick
lers in their faces and request, nay. de-
mand them to step in and become ossi-
fed and do all sorts of things which. In
more conventional periods, are looked
upon as at least indicative of spirit OF
unnecessary enthusiasm and airiness.
After all. hold-over DRINKS. viewed from
any angle. are more or less boomerang
ish. as it were in their effects both upon
the participants and the onlookers or
care-takers. But when whole cityful
and the biggest cityful in the western
hemisphere, goes upon one prodigious os-
sitied wallow in order to indicate it's in
terest in the outcome of a balloting
seance. and remains on the wallow until
the cows come home and are driven
forth again five or six times, why. then,
it's time for the chroniclers to at least
say so and let the reflective readers do
the rest; which duty has now, 1t is hoped,
been satisfactorily performed by the
undersigned.
THE divas are getting along on every
! ship now most of them loving the
United States and the coins and cur
rencies thereof more than ever. Oh. how
they do love America and the Americans.
and how their press agents are Whacklng
that love off on the typewriters by the
bale. A good deal of the love-for-us stuff
gets printed, too, because divas is divas,
just like eggs is eggs and there you are.
One of 'em, however. is person by the
name of Maria Gay. from Spain. who is
going to do new kind of Carmen
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

NASHINGTONIAN
who is racing a
string of horses
at Pimlico track
in Baltimore was
saying S o m e
things the other
evening a b o u t
folks in general
bulging into race
track paddocks:
I, II never could
3 ~r,t YylSt
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

MEM Der h o W
the maEazinists
and easy charities
and such frivo-
lous speculative
persons used 10
bewail the lack of
what they called
the C ar n / v a ]
spirit" in the
United States ?
How they said,
lachr Y m o S e | y,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

wv, minneapolis
isn't such a poor
sounding word
has quite a fine,
sonorous sort OF
ring to 1T, as a
matter of fact.
All the same,
there is a GER
tain man OF
standing, who is
in and out Of
" a s hington a
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

lust by way of indication that the aver
J age bookmaker. whose field OF activity
has been somewhat circumscribed of late
by the again-indorsed Mr.. Hughes, is
mighty blamed good Trainer of election
bets. Here's a fact:
\ professional bookmaker out in Chi
cago, Just for the fun of the thing, and
to prove that he was more of prophet
and the warmest political prognosticator
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

of them all. made up sixteen even-nloney
bets, which were published in Windy
city newspaper. Two men in this office
split on them, each taking the eight that
appealed most to him. and betting s. on
each proposition. Figuring up, after the
returns had all come in they found that
the bets had absolutely squared off and
that neither owed the other a cent.
If that isn't framing 'em some-inaS-
much as number of the bets were based
on pluralities and such, then I'm crazy
with the heat. And the thermometer
doesn't indicate any such state of affairs
these days.
THE solid south is showing sisns of
wear: is getting worn to the warp
in spots; is fraying at the edges-in other
words is waking up and getting wise to
things. For yeahs and yeahs and yeahs
for SO long that the memory of man
runneth not to the contrary. the solid
south has been the easy mark; the come
on: the greengoods purchaser. and the
wide-eyed rube Of the democratic party
1t gave everything and got nothing. 1t
delivered the goods on election day and
got the chilled shoulder and the iced mitt
every other day in punches of four years
1t would eat out of the hand. walk lame,
roll over and play dead, stand without
hitching and was nice for lady to ride
1t would vote for snow man with the
proper democratic label around it's neck
and turn down the angel Gabriel if said
celestial happened to be ornamented with
d republican tag. The south was there
all the time with both cheeks working
overtime ON the biblical principle. 1t
was good old wagon-but lit done broke
down. To be more accurate, it is devel-
oping variety of one-horse-shayness
that speaks well for the future.
It may appear to the intellectual leader
from this metaphorical hash just dished
out that several republicans have been
discovered in the south. This is correct,
and several is, perchaunce ID bit too
conservative an estimate. All over the
south Mr. Taft got a good-sized vote, and
when the people below the m. and D.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

has had opposition in his district, but
heretofore he has fattened on it. 1t has
been generally reported in Washington
that in previous years the colonel always
made personal. house to house, baby to
baby canvass of his district. When he
found man who didn't agree with his
views. and who in all probability would
vote against him, they say that Col. Pete
would stop and argue. Sometimes he
would devote at least flve minutes TO an
effort to convince the man that he was
dead wrong.
Then argument falling. Col. Pete would
take off his coat and wallop the recalcl-
trant human ballot within all inch of his
life, sitting on his chest until he secured
an ironclad election day promise. UP 10
the present this method never failed. 80
it would seem that advancing years and
the inroads of age upon one of the most
enthusiastically equipped patriots that ever
stepped in shoe leather have contributed
to the defeat of one of the best known
members of the lower house OF congress.
All of us will miss Mr.. Hepburn's an
nual oral denunciation Of the District Oh
Columbia, it's Commissioners. clerks
streets, avenues, car lines and cor
norations and his violent assaults
upon the various things in the govern
mental system which appealed to MIN as
punk. punker punkest and punklssimo-
and Pete is very sure of the "issimoness
of it all. most of the time.
But, in common with most folks who have
never been assaulted by him, L am fond
of Col Pete. and shall be genuinely sorry
to see him leave the House. When 1t
comes time for him to depart l shall ap-
proach him, my countenance clothed in
sobs. and kiss him chastely on the brow.
And I'll probably lose three teeth IN
vain endeavor to duck his appreciative
right swing.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

NE evening early in
the autumn a dis
tinguished retired
general of the reg
ular army. whose
war service was
brilliant, was seat
ed on the lawn In
front of his Wash
ington home in con-
versation with a
crony, when an Ital-
ian with a street
/ Of the house.
street piano of the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

ELL, lit" Is all over
for another, four
years and even
the defeated can
didateS seem re-
lieved. Mr.. Taft
confesses to being
tired to death,
and Mr.. Bryan
has retired to the
seclusion of Fair
View-on-the Pike
u-itl, on oir c1ISb-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

line get sufficiently interested, as whole.
to rub the rust off the franchise. oil it
with common sense and use it with dis
cretion. regardless of the fact that Pete
Jones of Homily Hollow lost an ear in
the war and that Col. Thingumbuby
Cartah still mentions the "Yanks' when
peevish. the better it will be for every
body concerned.
Which view will probably be considered
a gross and gratuitous impertinence by a
number of hereditary democrats employed
in the government departments in Wash
ington under republican administrations
and who haven't voted in twenty-seven
years.
A BRIGHT-LOOkINGyo ungster of some
seven years or so was standing on
the corner of 18th and u streets the other
afternoon telling some kids of the same
age all about the election of Taft. Recog-
nizing line of intangibly familiar con-
versation-allowing for the linguistic linn
itations of a seven-yea r-old citizen-to- be.
I stopped to listen. Finally the bright
little kid wound up his remarks and said.
with marvelously superior air:
Say. why don't You know my daddy
elected Taft?'
And what is your daddy's name?' ask
ed MISUNDERSTANDING old gent who had
heard the wind-up.
Gus Karker. sir replied the little
boy. Whereupon the street cars stopped
running and everybody went home to din
ner.
Amt 1t the truth?
I<I AM astonished at the size of the vote
l polled by Taft and Bryan said a
local pluto the day after the returns were
in. Said pluto owns a large SHORTY auto
mobile and returned to Washington only
couple of days before November 5.
Why, said he. Il toured through five
states. and in only one of them, and that
only once. did l hear the subject of poll
tics even mentioned. travelled through
the rural districts, too, where the farmers
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

ELLIOT WOODS, VINO most efficiently
Z superntends the legislative gas house
on the hill, and in his spare time writes
poetry and music, triaes with the drama,
paints, plays the piano and violin. raises
yaller-laig chickens for home consumption
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-11-07

Special Correspondence OF The Star
NEW YORK, November 6. 1905
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1908-06-11
That Nasal Csatarrh

Nasal Catarrh is nauseating dis
ease eanyone knows who has had to sit
close TO, or talk face-to-face with
a person reeking with purulen t
catarrh. To get a whiif Of the bad
breath OF such a person is to sicken
at once and turn away.
Have you ever had to endure, in
sickening silence, the hawking and
gagglng OF a Catarrh victim, orhave
20 sit close 10 such a person and ex-
perienee a disgusting, appetite-losing,
foul odor, which you could not ex-
plain and did not know what Il was?
That's Catarrh, and there are plenty
OF people who have II. You can get
rid OF your case without much delay
and avoid becoming an object OF
aversion TO Others, or even members
Of your own family, by merely using
the simplest cure In the world-Bun-
sens Catarrh Cure.
Millions OF trial hoxes are given
away annually. thereby risking our
reputation and every one that is tri-
ed pr due es7 Immediate beneficial
results.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1908-06-11

Bunsen's Catarrh Cure is a cream
like, antiseptic healing balm. The
great remedial agents, Oil OF Euca-
lyptus, Mentbol, Boracic Acid, etc.
are Incorporated into a smooth, vel
vet-like Rttrolatum.
This creation-Bunsen's Catarrh
Cure-produees immediate and last
ing relief 20 sufferers from Catarrhal
Deafness, Nasal Catarrh, Hay Fever
aud Cold in the Head.
Try Bunsen's Catarrh Cure; we say
it is par excellence, the most rapid.
thorough and effective treatment
ever prepared for the cure OF catarrh-
al troubles of the nose and throat
and we say it because OF the results
obtained from its use.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1908-06-11

When you are in position to use an
other stenographer or boolkeeper or
the Swo Ia one, phone or write the
Employment Department of the Capital
city Business College, Guthrie. Okla
You viii appreciate securing help that
is thoronghly trained 10 meet the prac-
tlcas demands OF your office The
largest business college ia the state
must necessarily turn ont the best
trained help. Our services are free TO
YOU Give us trial and thereby do
yourself favor and zone worthy
young man on woman
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1908-06-11
WOMAN SHRIEKS WHEN
INFORMED OF SUICIDE
Supposed wife Of Victim i
Detroit Drops Telephone
Receiver on Getting
News
40
Special to Daily Leader.

Special to Daily Leader.
Chicago ILL.,. June it.,-A bullet
through the heart. fired by himself
ended the life of Roy Arthur Gormely,
of Detroit THE million-dollar kid
was MIR Gormelys own nickname for
himself he is believed to have been
In the grain business.
The news of his suicide was given
last night over the lOng-distance tele-
phone to Detroit 60 p woman who is
supposed to have been his wife. As
Frank Repetto, house detective at the
Annex, uttered the words, Mr.. Gorns
ely killed himself at 3:35 o'clock this
afternoon a shriek came % his ears
from the other end Of the wire in De
trcit Then the woman's voice cried:
oh, my Cod Then there was 81
lence The receiver had been dropped
and the connection broken.
In the absence Of information from
his supposed wife the only available
Information about him was fathered
from his effects He seems to have
been employed by the Acme Stock and
Grain company Room 404, Hodges
building. Detroit. No money was
found IN his clothing He had, how
ever, a check for $3.50. gold watch
and chain, geld cuff buttons and some
diamond buttons.
He registered at the Annex Thurs
day afternoon II is thought from ex-
animation of his hotel account, that he
proceeded TO enjoy himself In Chicago,
as drinks of various kinds mcmposed
2 substantial part of his bill. He was
not known TO any of the employees of
the hotel
A maid on the floor on which Mr..
GOrmely had his room heard a pistol
shot. She notified Mr.. Repetto He
entered Mr. Gormelys room. The
man was lying across the bed, partly
dressed. dead
The revilvcr with which he had shot
himself was lying beside him. The
weapon bad evidently been recently
bought, as the paper IN which it had
been wrapped was in the room.
Repetto notified the police Of the
Harrison station and the body was
taken TO Ralstons undertaking rooms.
Gormely seems TO have had a number
of Chicago friends, for six telephone
calls were received at Ralston's wiring
the aftemion and evening The persons
at the other end OF the line. one OF
whom was a woman, said theg would
come right away" TO make arrange
ments TO take care OF the remains.
The same Detroit woman who was
told Of the suicide over the long dis
tanee telephone by Repetto had been
calling Mr.. Gormely several times dur
ing the last two days Each time that
Gormely was summoned 10 answer the
call he had responded The moment
he picked up the receiver, however,
AN dhcard the voice at the other end
of the line, he had hung up and
walked away.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1908-06-11

thousand dollars from his fathers es-
tate on May 20 at which time he be.
came AZ years of age This Is denied
by bis sister Mrs. snder who declar-
ed that M bequesis had been made to
him. that his father D h Weems. was
stiil living and now IN lIoldenville.
The btnt erinlaw Mrs. Snider stated,
would icave at once for oklahoma
City and take charge of the body
Weems iormWly was 4 burlington
railroad conductor running between
Springfield lll ana st iouis During
his railroading career. he was run over
ana one leg ainnutated Since that
fine he has foamcd about the country
but always was prosperous in business
verlurcs which he made on a small
scale. He has relatives living IN
Quincy, M Otmmwa Iowa and
Springfield.