davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
THE COW CLUB.

The Cow Club gathers every night
In Stokes grocery store,
To sit around the stove and talk
Important matters Ger.
For there are many, many things
Which must be settled there;
And this the Cow Club does each night
With thOroughness and care.
The railroad has to take its turn.
And then the trolley, which
Has not arrived, although Ii Will
If there's no legal hitch.
me doings down in Washington.
All questions great or small:
Bob Evans feet, the great canal
The Cow Club raps them ALL
MafcOni's wireless Is a thing
That's just get up to sell,
And air machines will never 6y.
They know that pretty we'll
And when they've been all round the globe
And go- eech matter straight
They come back into Gungawamp
To finish 1heT debate.
The same old question holds the floor,
The same old nightly boast:
Who gets the biggest lot of milk
Whose cow is worth the most?"
There's where they hem and hitch AM
haw"
And finally collide:
That seems to be the only thing
The Cow Club can't decide
Joe Cone in New York Sun.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
No Truth in Rumors.

Wall street has heard for several DAYS
that Il. III. Hartman was down and out
in a physical sense and that a stroke of
paralysis had placed him on the bench
as meal ticket for the Hartman house
hold. These rumors have grown more
persistent from day to day until there
We're many who believed that the wiz
ard of the Pacifics" had about run his
career, and that at last he was to be
come a mere looker-on in the great game
of finance.
But the other day something transpired
which put all these rumoFS at rest and
shows that the doughty little magnate is
a long way from being the physical
wreck that the bear element of the street
has been trying to believe and to inveigle
others into believing. 1t was up at the
Highlanders' park when Clark Crit
fith's aggregation was doing things that
are painful TO relate to a certain ball
team that halls from the same western
village that claims the head of the Stand
ard Oil company as a citizen. The game
was exciting, even to the fans. and many
of the plays Were really hearthreaking.
At an exciting point there arose from
the very center OF the grand stand ON the
hilltop a man who wore a familiar hat.
much too large for his head 1t was
L. Henry Hartman in his own proper
person, present and participating as a
rooter to a high degree. And the way he
rooted! 1t was veritable revelation for
the crowd. He expressed his idea that
the umpire man was far from being an
affidavit factory, and that wheG it came
to teaching ball nine from Mr.. Rookie
feller's home village how to take joke
Clark Griffith certainly had the whole
market cornered and the short interest on
the run to cover. And when it was all
over the man of millions trudged ont Of
the Enclosure as happy as a schoolboy
and chuckling over the home teams vie
tory.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Wisconsin's Work for Forest Presev,
ton

Now while attention is directed tn ~.
subject Of forest preservation hy tbe az
sembling OF the conference of goverror
AT Washington. especial interest attarba,
to what Wisconsin has undertake. 3,
this direction. The work, though of re-
cent origin. has gone forward on scai,
which places the Badger State in H..
van of those that are committed in nrac-
tice as well as in theory TO the conse1,s
ton Of their natural resources.
Three main purposes are held in yiav-.
% The protection of the headwater. ns
the principal streams of the state COW,
serving the waterfiow for power NM.
poses. ETC.; % the utilization of tbs
waste lands of the state for timber en-
ture; 90 the creation among the vsst
number of beautiful small lakes in Norfh-
ern Wisconsin of a great summer resor,
unequaled elsewhere in the Union.
BY the law of 1905 all lands BELONGING
to the state north of Town 33-tbp uortf
boundary line of Taylor countv-war<
turned over to the Board of ForeStrv
Those suitable for agriculture are to he
sold. the money being used for the mr.
chase of others, while the rest will CON.
stitnte a forestry reserve. Twenty fbop-
sand additional acres Were granted r.
the state by Congressional enactment
secured by Senator La Toilette in 1905
These have been chosen and also are nm.
der the jurisdiction of the Board of For
estry. together with 10000 acres ac-
quired by purchase. In all. there 0ra
at present in Wisconsin's forest reserve
800 100000 acres, mostly located in tho
counties of Ashland Bayfield,. Burnett
Douglass. Florence. Forest Rusk. IRON
Langlade. Lincoln. Marinette. Oneida
Polk Price. Sawyer, Villas and Wash
burn. They include the area contain
ing the headwaters of most of the priDcj
pal rivers of the state.
Not only will reforestation be under
taken on the cut-over lands. but IRE
cautions will be used to protect tie
growing timber from fire. The scheme is
comprehensive. and the land now held
for the purpose is not more than 10 per
cent of what will eventually be ACQUIRED
The board of Forestry as at present
made UP consists of Charles r. Van Hise
president of the University of Wisconsin:
II. L. Russell. dean of the College of
Agriculture; f. A. Birge. director of the
State Geological survey; Frank L. Gil
bert. attorney general; and George Bey-
er of Oconto. The state forester is +.
NJ. Griffiths. and the assistant state for
ester Frank b. Moody. President Van
Hise and Forester Griffiths are of the
party attending the Washington confer
ence in company with Gov. Davidson
| Evening Wisconsin, Milwaukee.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
The "SnarrnWs. ~

There is nothing English" about the
humor of George Graves. the comedian
in that excellent comic opera 'The Little
Michus.'' Here's one Mr.. Graves brought
from across the water that is as funny
as any homemade article.
A teacher had been telling her class OF
boys that recently worms had become 50
numerous that they destroyed the crops,
and it was necessary to import the spar
row to eXternlinate' them. The sparroWs
multiplied very fast. and were gradually
driving away our native birds.
Johnny was apparently very natten-
tive, and the teacher, thinking to catch
him mapping, said:
Johnny. which is worse, to have
worms or sparrowS 2?
Johnny hesitated a moment and then
replied: please. | never had the spar
ws."-Young's Magazine.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
THE PATRICK HENRY HOUSE.
Facts About the Old Virginia Mansion to
Be Burned Because of Bat Plague

Members of the Aylett family in Rich
mond confirm the story of the curious
plague of bats which has overwhelmed
the Montyale house, occupied for several
generations by the connections and de-
seendants of Patrick Henry. Bats by
the thousands have swarmed about the
place during recent years. under the
porches, IN the garnet, beneath the floors
and IN every conceivable crack. until for
some months past the house has been
entirely untenabe and the owners are
contemplating burning or tearing it down
in an effort to rid the neighborhood Of
the pest.
Situated in King William county. the
old house stands on plantation of about
100 acres. most of which is in cutiva-
ton. Until the time of his death. FIVE
or six years ago, it was occupied by Will
liam Aylett. On his death the place was
left to his seven children. two of whom
have disposed of their interest to the
other FIVE.
All of these have now married and
scattered, two members of the family
living in Richmond. For some summers
the building was occupied as a summer
home and left with caretakers in the
winter. 1t was at this time that the
bats took possession. until in the last few
years the family have abandoned the use
of the house entirely. About year ago
considerable repairs were put on the
place and it was hoped at that time that
the bats had been driven out, but with
the opening of spring weather the crea-
lures have returned in even greater
numbers. The tenant farmer has been
driven forth by the advancing army, and
the house stands abandoned to the ele-
ments, the home of bats in every crevice
Montvale was one of the few old Vir-
ginia mansions in King William county
remaining in the hands of the original
family During the lifetime of the late
William Aylett it was widely known as
one of the most hospitable homes in that
section of the state.-Richmond Times
DesDatch
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
The Drainage Congress.

While the convention of governors of
the various states is comforting with the
President as to the conservation of the
natural resources of the country through
forestry, outstanding of water and
economy i'll the use of coal and iron,
the counterpart of the movement TO
which the President has given the pres
tige of his personal interest is proceed
ing quietly with its proposed work. in
convention at the National capital The
National Drainage Congress, under the
auspices of the National Drainage As
socii.+ion of which Gov. Broward of
Florida Is president. is promoting a
movement for federal help for national
drainage as general policy. without
regard for any particular project. The
supporters of this proposition hope
to win the attention and interest of the
assembled governors, as almost every
state in the union has areas of sub
merged lands which can be reclaimed by
systems of drainage.
Bills having for their object the pro
motion of reclamation work by drain
age are now on the calendars of both
houses of Congress. Recently the senate
asked the Secretary of Agriculture for
information regarding the area of swamp
and overhowed lands in the various
states susceptible of reclamation by
drainage for agricultural use, and in re-
ply 10 this request Secretary Wilson
sent in a tabular statement showing the
acreage of such lands in forty states.
The aggregate is in the neighborhood of
0,0O0.OO0 acres. FloridaS interest in
the drainage proposition through the
leadership of Gov Broward is revealed
hy the fact that she has a larger area of
swamp lands than any other state in the
union-19. 100000 acres. Louisiana is
second. with an acreage Of To, l96, GO5.
Wisconsin's area of submerged lands cap
able of reclamation is placed by Secre-
tary Wilson at 100000 acres. Drain
age operations are now in progress in
several places in Wisconsin that viii ma
terially reduce this aggregate, but the
states area Of tillable soil would be
greatly increased were reclamation pro-
iects undertaken wherever swampS can
be drained.
In some sections Of the South. large
areas Of swamp land have been made
valuable for agriculture by combined
drainage and irrigation. projects through
which rice culture is carried on more
probably than in the old tidal swamps
az the Carolina coast. Texas now
raises large crops of rice on lands
of this kind along the Gulf Of
Mexico. In the North there is no such
opportunity. and the work of reclamation
must be through systematic drainage 10
make the soil rs dry as possible. Tie
subject is large enough to enlist the in
tereSt of the nation. and il can be dis
cussed probably in connection with Of
fort 10 conserve the water and timber
supplies,
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Sweating in Paris.

The first volume only of the result Of
the official inquiry into the white trade
or the lingerie of Paris shows that sweat
ing in the most appalling form prevails
in this great industry, producing the
most artistic and the most costly goods
for the richest people all over the lux
urious world. Here is no feeble indus
try" for the trade is one of which Pafs
commands all markets. Yet in this very
industry the conditions of out-wOrk and
homework are proved to be as bad AZ
any that can be found in existence any
where Woman Worker
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
A Waste of Good ENGLISH.

Bobhy's mother was often distressed
by her small sons lapses from correct
speech, all the more because his reports
from school were always so good.
Bobby" she said, plaintiyely, one
day, why do you keep telling Major TO
set up when you know sit up is what
you should sayy'
ooh, well, mother" Bobby answered,
hastily, "of course | have lots of gram
mar. but | don't like to waste it on
Major when he doesn't know the diff
ference, being a dog"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

At school during the nature study
hour one of the brightest little fellows '
hs class was asked by the teacher y
name three cold blooded animals Ajtt.
a moments hesitation he said. ~ pear
bear a walrus, and a seal" The tea91t.
smiled and said, Johnny, this time }.u
did not get it quite right, but peFlJl
you can tell me three minerals. 'oa'
yes" came the quick reply, ''vichy. -a''
ger and ginger ale. New York Times
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

Good crop conditions are reporra'l iT'.a
all parts Of Mexico The sugar '9
crop which is now being harvested =
the largest in the history of the coNI's,
while the yield of coffee exceeds tI.l. ~.
any previous year. There is s."s'es-.
of corn ard wheat in some sections
the prospects are favorable 'r
crops of those two cereals this ''A
Moody's Magazine.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Passing 1t Around.

Domestic-Please. ma am, can you
give me my character?
Mistress Certainly, Bridget; bnt what
do you want it for? You are surely not
going to leave without giving me notice
tirstI
Domestic-Oh, never fear. ma am (!
I'm not thinking of leaving you; but my
sisters going to service, and wants the
lnpn of itI-Iife.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Carving 1t Along.

An elderly and most respectable look
ing man was recently brought before a
magistrate. says the London Telegraph.
charged with unbecoming and hilarious
conduct.
say for himself, lie mumbled something
about doing as the Romans do
Very good returned the magistrate.
continue to do as the Romans do. Pay
seven shillings sixpence"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
rs Solitarv Victim

Gen. Wheeler and a number Of his col
leagues in the service were once swap
ping war stories, when Little Joe" was
reminded of one that he bad heard no.
long before.
A friend of a veteran of the Union
forces once asked whether the latter, in
his term of service in the Civil war, had
ever killed a man. The old soldier hest
tatea moment and then said:
"Well. l think that about the only one
was a Confederate at the first battle of
Bull Run. You see. / was footing il i.
startling way and the reb chased me
for something over a distance of ten
miles: then he dropped dead from ex-
haustion. ''-InGiauSpo Star.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
lust Cause and Impediment.

The Kindly Old Gentleman--W my
little man. and what's your name?
The Little Man-please sir, | dunno.
The Kindly Old Gentleman-Bless my
soul you don't know?
The Little Man-No, sir, please, sir,
mother got married again yesterday
London Sketch.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Enjoyment CurtaiIed.

II suppose you are glad whipping has
been abolished from the schools? p
Nav. / amt" replied the tough boy.
why, dem bouts l ulster have wild the
principal was the only fun / got."-
Philadelphia Ledger.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Patiently Waiting.

Now" said Miss Yerner, you'd bet
ter go up and speak to papa"
.O"' exclaimed Mr.. Slokoche. who had
finally proposed, is he up yetY'
Yes, he's waiting for you in the sit
ting room. unless he's got tired and gone
to bed. Philadelphia Press.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Laying Down the Law.

Jack. I'm going away"
Going away, MadgeY'
yes, going away. But before | go /
have something 10 say to YOU"
Something TO say to me, little wife?"
Yes, something TO say to you. Don't
send me any poker stories in lieu of the
weekly remittance. That'll be about all. F"
--pittsbnrg Post
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
The Graft of Divorce.

Mrs. Cobwigger-So you think you
would be happier if we were in society
Freddie would be at Christmas, ma
/ know some boys in the smart set and
they all have at least two papas to give
them presents.-Smart Set.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Stricken in Spirit.

Stranger-This village boasts of a
choral society, doesn't it?
Resident-No; we just endure it with
standardization Tit-Bits.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Yesterday and Today.

Fred-Last night as you stood in the
moonlight | couldn't help but think how
much | would like to kiss you.
Freda-Well. the poet says, 1.-THE
thought Of yesterday is the action of
TODAY '-Tatler.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Always the Same.

Professor Coming home from D.. as, ,', ~
holding up triumphantly his umpTeAs ,c.
his wifel-You see. my dear Aiiha, .--
stupid are all the anecdotes about ~
Observation-Disclosures you see. t"'''
forgotten my umbrella" -oe
Mrs. Professor-But. my dear se
didn't take your umbrella with you.
left il at home. "-Frankf0rr Wlze'a'"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Improvident.

you don't mean to say that Spender
is on his uppers. Why | thought he had.
money to burnw
80 he did have. but unfortunately
fer Spender he carried no fire insurance"
Brooklyn Life.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
The Junior Dance.

A grind. two melancholy stays, and Thou
Reside me in the wilderness, | vow
If these be pleasures of the Junior Dance
Another place We're Paradise enow,
Harvard Lampoon.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

The American Locomotive company.
Of Richmond Na.. has Just set un eighty
locomotives and two steam Shoyels for
the South Manchurian railway at Daiuy.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
He Wanted 1t.

by the way. SIR asked the waiter,
how would you like to have your
steak?"
Very much indeed" replied the mild
man, who had been waiting for twenty
minutes illustrated Bits.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
A Mistake.

Client--Didn't you make a mistake in
going into law instead of the army?
Lawyer-Why?
Clent-By the way you charge there
would be little left of the enemy.-Sacred
Heart Review
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
A Weighty Reason.

That Taft may very soon be cast
heavy part TO play,
Need not be wondered at since he
Has such a winning weigh!
-Lippincott S.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Day Dreams.

Day Dreams.
care not for the halls where art
Is spread before the eye;
i care not for the mummers smart,
With mimic laugh or sigh.
/ care not for the statesman's speech,
Nor for the poets scrawl:
/ want TO hear the bleachers screech
When some one says, ''play BALL"
The sacrifice a statesman makes
To be most frank and blunt
In the small interest awakes.
| want TO see a bunt.
The fearless motorist and bold
Sets not for me the pace.
I'm simply yearning TO behold
A slide to second basel
Washington star.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

Advertise in this paper, and MAKE WV
wants known to your home people
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
They Knew Paul.

''Would you think Paul capable of de-
ceiving a friendT
Certainly not. Not one of his friends
believes a word he says."-Rus.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

Adelaide-Why, Cornelia, your hair is
all musSed up.
Cornelia-Yes. dear; you-you see,
George stole up and snatched dozen
kisses before | could scream.
Adelaide-But why don't You step in
front Of the mirror aud rearrange YOUR
hair.
Cornelia Gracious! Why, | wouldn't
do it for the world. Why, none of the
girls would believe he kissed me.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

"Ah. my noy, are you so fond of school
that you grieve at its being closed?
mo. sir! But | got an excuse for bein'
late today an / can't use ii"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
The Nature of the Hunt.

Advertising pays Try il.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
In Washington.


who is that distinguished looking
MANI"
That's the official guesser of the agrI-
cultural department"
What ere his duties?"
"'rhey tell him when she seismograph
indicates an earthquake and he guesses
where ii is.'-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
49,
Slightly Different.
The request was made in public Ii
hrary for the rather remarkable title,
Wait Minute" After some detective
work on the part of the librarian il was
found the book wanted was "Tarry Thou
Til l Come. New York Herald.
-
Deserved.
His Majesty What is the charge
against this newcomers
He went into a street car full of la
dies holding a lighted cigar in his hand,
well. magnify that cigar about 1000
times and let him sit ON the end of il
for couple of million years. Life.
49,
The Nature of the Hunt.
Nimrod--Are you fond of hunting?
Gyer-lt all depends.
Nimrod-Depends on what?
Gyer-FoNes or collar studs.-Illustrat-
ed Bits.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

Advertise in Your Home Paper.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Nae ONLY Way Sac Knew.

Hell think Miss Bond has such a
sweet smile.
She-So all the men tell Smart
Set.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Considerably Disappointed.

An English lord who visited Scotland
was at a dinner given in his honor AT n
private residence. \ little daughter of
his host, who was too well bred to stnre.
but who eyed him covertly as the occa.
sion presented itself, finally ventured the
remark: And you are really and truly
an English lord%' Eyes" he answered
pleasantly. really and truly" Il have
often thought | would like To see an
English lord" she went on. "and-and
" And now you are satisfied nj
last" he interrupted laughingly. "N-no."
replied the truthful little girl. I'm not
satisfied. I'm Il good deal disappointed. 3"
Argonaut.
His Exact Meaning.
Yes" said Popley, my haby's got
hair like I'm pretty sure to have some
day"
''Ha. ha. You mean the baby's pretty
sure to have hair some day like you've
got"
Il mean what | said The baby 5
bald. Philadelphia Press.
49,
Desperate Gambling
An English merchant was a daily Gus
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
Modern Facilities.

'.Who wuz dis Rip Van Winkle?"
An old-time guy wot slept in de
mountings.
Didn't have no public libraries,
s'pose. in his day louisville Courier
Journal.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22

toner in a well-known restaurant, and
always honored the waiter in q most
generous fashion, as he liked him for his
effectiveness. One day, TO his surprise,
another waiter served him. THE other
waiter is here" said the new one. ''but
he can't serve you." why not 2"
queried the astonished diner. We'll. you
see. sir" was the reply, I'VE played
had lost all his money | had the good
fortune to win you."-Penny Pictorial.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-05-22
His Exact Meaning.

An English merchant was a daily Gus