The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-10-14
hUMOR or THE DAY

hUAOR or THE DAY
Saving the Pennies.-Improviden Citizen
Would you like to subscribe a dollar or
two to help out poor old washerwoman
in bed with rheumatism. and the house
full of hungry. children? Provident Citi-
zen-Sorry, old man. but l can't afford
it. viii you come along with me to some
lively show at the theater where we cam
forget these sordid miseries. and a nice
Explained.-''what is a parlor socialism
But what is parlor socialism, "A be-
lief that all gossip should be held in COM
mon washington Herald.
Be sure your wife will find you out.-St.
Louis Post-Dispatch. q
meet Miss Dingleberry. She's considered
to be remarkably well informed Say,
II G all the s s eS dear Soy
fies.S-cieveiand Piain-DeaIer.
about it, IT shouldn't think you would"
Houston Post.
Bill-You say she seems never to be
satisfied? Jill-Yes. she's the kind of a girl
that when you kiss her she seems to think
Yonkers Statesman.
Euclid Avenue Man.-Hell, they say, in
paved with good intentions Detroit Ave-
nue. Man-Yes. and I'll bet they're all the
time tearing that pavement up to lay
new sewer.-Cleveland Leader. f
At the Bookshop.-"I want a book called
How to Think'-for a friend."-Punch.
One More Chance-One day the office
boy went to. the editor of the Soaring
Eagle and said: There's a tramp at the
hn hn ha ha mn
eat for - six &c days. "Fe a mi him in. said
the editor. IF we can find out how he
does It we can run this paper for another
IA stipulati9,n."Can tell you some re-
you'll agree not to forestall me by also
telling it to all of my friends"
seaver-My neiehbor, Hamilton, is of the
opinion that confidence has been restored
Weaver-Thought you didn't speak to
don't sift his coal ashes any more
Brooklyn Life.
Teacher-so you've lost all your mar
bles-eh? Boys always lose marbles who
cheat. Tommy-But how about the other
Teller wot won all mine?-Comic Cuts.
II should never have thought that study
ing would have cost so much money"
Yes. father; and If you only knew how
little have studied.
"And when," said Mrs. Nuvoreesh,
those French pheasants came by singing
the Mayonnaise it was too deeply touch
ing for rds.'-Success Magazine.
do you ever meet DR.. Rybold?" "often.
He and 1-er-are thrown together a good
deal. We travel On the same suburban
trolley line. Chicago Tribune.
Affable Barber-You're very bald on top,
sir. Self-Conscious Customer (much an
noyed)-What If I am? You needn't talk
so much 'Ow about that squint of yours?
London Taller.
Little Margie (after watching her small
brother devouring several large sections
of chocolate cake)-Mamma, isn't II funny
appears to be from the outside?-Judge.
Teacher sdn geography)-Theres are SO
many people in China that every time you
putting vigorously)-Harry, what are you
doing? Harry-I'm killing Cinnamon
New York Sun.
hero. in an appealing voice. as he stood at
''Pve lost my leg Wen, amt got it,"
snapped the woman fiercely, as the door
closed with a bang.-Victoria Eagle.
See the Funny Young Mani What is
he Wearing?' THAT is Monocle, my
Child And why does he wear only One
Glass?" Gee, but you have mean Dis
position! wouldn't you leave him one
Stage Presence of Mind.-The Villain
(when the cartridge failed to exploded
Take that lead pill in your hear-rt, curse
invention these noiseless guns are!-Ex-
change.