The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-10-21
DR IFT WO OD
All is Fair" in love and war and this week.

All is Fair in love and war and Montgomery this week.
  Three pretty Montgomery blondes stood on the Lawrence Street side walk sucking sugar cane and watching The Advertisers big press run Saturday night. The remark has no special sig nifieanee except that the girls Zere sweet, and so was the sugar cane, and we could hardly, work for looking at We'll. there's one consolation in this life: If you can't be a king or a pres- ident or something like that you can do what -ts better; live in Montgom- cry, which is as near Heaven as a per- son ever gets on this earth.
 Mir. Rockefeller says he bought a home in Augusta because of the quiet Of the town. Surely this is no com- piiment to Augusta:
 A Chicago woman when she died left $1 to be paid to her husband in four monthly instalments. Such extraya- gance is incomprehensible. This feI- low will undoubtedly drink himself to death. That's just like woman's s idea of generosity.
 The bride of a Cleveland man was kidnapped one hour after her marriage ceremony. The bridegroom has set up Q howl. but the fool doesn't know when he is well off.
 The biting cold is sometimes the re- suit of the teeth of the gale.
 That winters near
 Each mortal knows.
 For he can hear
 The autumn clothes.
 
 If you are sick, take heart. the doc- out the price of 2 big bill. Just think what good friend a girl loses in a fellow when she marries him.
 Oh, for the faith of a little child or a political candidate.
 There is no sound to disturb the mornings in the Alabama woods save the dropping of nuts or the barking of an occasional squirrel.
 Of those. who die only Il per cent than that are fire Insured. though they ought to be, for the hot hereafter. If the young lady with the green waist and yellow hat who left her restaurant where she and we happened to be eating last night, we will mall same to her if she'll send us her right name
 A few more days till November 3rd. And the icy winds will blow, And somebody's going to eat Turkey And somebody's going to eat crow. When a girl tells a voting man that she guesses they had better part for ever, because he tried TO kiss ner and is wondering whether she had better wear the pink waist or the blue one when she lets him come back on the following night. (oh, pickles.) The souvenir postcard craze is said to be on the wane. This fad has about reached the height of rldiculousness, and we suppose there will be some- thing to take It's place equally as fool ish.
 "Give us clean money" says The (s. co News, We are not so fastidious; if the bills have few germs in 'em we aren't going to throw Before marriage a girl wanra her young man to think about his neck ties: after marriage she wants him AO tlIIHA opbHI Al9 llSss A woman in Kansas Is suing her hus band for divorce because he has not taken bath In eleven years. This is a dirty shame.
 Wouldn't 1t be an awful break for some paper to print Hoke Smith Hoax Myth2
 
 When blonde ungei from Mont gomery knocks at the pearly gate, St. Peter never falls to let the perfumed darling In on her good looks
 
 The Awn1 ening. There was a man in our town Thought he was wondrous wise, He jumped into the briar-patcn. Love. Which scratched out both his eyes. But he'd heeE married just three
 months.
 (To tell it gives me pain), When matrimony as fl will, Scratched them in again.
 PHIL H. ARMSTRONG.
 Back mt Drift. "One Florida man killed another for $S. Life seems to be cheap down that way says Drift Armstrong. And