The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1908-11-21

swept through the courtroom showed
that there was some sense of humor
left in those present
XIX
The poetic talent which nourishes so
luxuriantly in these tropics,--or some
of it anyhow, jumped to Hilo last week.
and the Tribune came out with three
quarters of a column of poetry II
its author wanted to make a sensation,
he did so, according to a friend of
mine who has just come from the
Breakwater city. He says that the
residents, who have a habit of getting
up early on weekly paper mornings,
frowned at the first verse, ground their
teeth at the second, tore their hair at
number three and by the time they
had waded through the whole fright
full lot some we're breaking furniture,
others used language which their as
tonished better halves will never for
give nor forget and none could eat any
breakfast. That Iuckless poet had put
his feet into every hole he could find.
Not a sore spot i'm the Hilo anatomy
did he fail to reach. Hiloites are SEN
sitive about having their place referred
to as rainy city" They admit that
showers come and go, but feel that
they have their share of sunshine and
are suffering for reputation acquired
years ago when ut rained all the time
and a boat was needed to cross Wal
nuenue street. That poet blithely
sang OF the sun being seen three times
a year from Cocoanut Island! Yielding
to another happy inspiration he offer
ed the pleasing little remark that ow-
ing to bugs and mosquitoes life in Hilo
is perpetual scratching and biting
Hilo has and is proud of a very pleas
ing and healthful night breeze from the
snowy slopes" of Mauna Loa, but this
unlucky poet cheerily doubled insults
in one line by persiflage about quaking
and smelling Hilo! Sailing easily along
to death and destruction he took a
fling at the sacred Burns club and he
wound up with a whacl at the Hilo
boom, remarling that the chief boom
in Hilo just now was in yellow jackets!
Before noon of the day of publica-
ton of this happy melody, | am told
again, Manager Cool of the Tribune be-
gan to wear a dangerous look and the
printers devil of his office had fled
shrieking across the street to the police
station. Drawing all, Cool went to his
customary lunch resort, where Hilo
citizens gather and discuss all things
much as Honolulu leading lights and
gossips do at the Big Bugs table In
Notes. The lunch hour was a fierce
battle for mere verbal existence, and
Cool had no time to eat. He fled
in anger from the angry and scornful
jibes of his one-time friends and went
and told the editor what he thought
of man who could print a poem like
that. Things still came his way, how
ever, and finally he took refuge in the
Elks' club. Here he was found late
in the afternoon studying forms of
indignant dissolutions of co-partner-
ships. With ingenuity that perhaps
speaks we'll for their lodge training,
those who found him planned Hilos
revenge. One by one they kept saun-
tering up to him and reciting a verse
of that CHASTITY poem. Many citizen
who hadn't tried to recite since he told
teacher that the boy stood on the burn
ing deck, learned one of the horrible
verses and acclaimed it at Cool. Mali
cious Elks in adjoining parlors set
them to music and softly warbted ac-
compartments to the declaiming
friends. For two solid hours, my
friend tells me, Cool stood it. Then
war, real war, broke out. Cool threat
ened to break necks and to distribute
prominent citizens in pieces all over
the landscape. Then he went to have
another talk with the editor.
At last accounts Cool was showing
marked accumulation of a retiring dis
position and was ready to get insulted
ii anyone so much as mentioned even
Shakespeare in his presence, regarding
anything which might in any way
whatever suggest poetry as an allusion
not to be tolerated
Xxx
Even as the immortal love of Damon
and Pythias is that effulgent affection
which must perorce exist between the
Advertiser and William Herbert ills
Said Ayres, for time and time again
till the minds OF man to the contrary
cannot recall have Ayres and the Ad'
vertiser clinched I'm that spasm of for
giveness and the renewed passion thai
comes of tears shed over each others
shoulders.
Now Charlie Rhodes has repented Of
his Advertiserial sins, | mean his many
interesting columns of commercialism
and his advice to The Bystander, anC
his two-page supplement stories on the