Arizona republican., 1908-02-16

I ast my Paw who he thot was agoin to git tn Nommynashun. He
 RepliZe at if tn Sines holds out a
 few Months longer at he has Reeson
 to Sleeve at it'll Probly be Willyum
 J. O'Brine But I sez at l didn't meen
 who tn Demmycrats was agoin' to
 Nommynate but who tn Republican
 Nominee is agoin to be. My Paw he
 sez: Now James, you're entic'n me
 into what's called tn Relm of Con
 jeckcher. Some thinks it's gOin' to
 be Mister Taft an some thinks it's
 goin' to be Mister Hughes. an some
 has idee 'at Uncle Josef Canyon
 might pull through an still theys
 some at thinks P"r-1ent Rooseyfelt
 is a wonderin' with Peer an Trem-
 blin' if theyTl be enuff Federle offs
 Holders git into tn Convenshun to
 force him to Run Agin. Tn President,
 I'm tole. is takin' all Possible Preca-
 shuns aginst sich a Clamity. Hes
 put in mos Seven Yeers at it an he
 thinks at he's got things in Sich
 Shape now at tn Almighty with sich
 help as Mister Taft'n be able to give
 him can keep things Runnin' Smooth. at leest fer four Yeers. Tn Presidents
 Ankshus to return to Privit Life sos at he can Enjoy tn Cam Repose at
 he's always Longin' fer. Tn Pres dent. James. is of what's called a Limfatic Temperment an Limfatic Fokes can stand a Good Deel of Rest without Complainin' None. Tn Siren yus Dooties of tn Presidenshle offs l,s.. ,,s Luvin' Disposishun. sos at he's had to make a Crate SaCerfize.
 Hes had more to contend with an most Presidents has had. You mite say at he hadn't been in tn White House a Munth til all hell Broke Loose. A Wave of Race Sooicide swep over tn Country an by tn time he got that Stopped, tn Octopusses broke out an he's been a Runnin' 'em around most ever sense. It'd a been a good deal easier fer President RoOs- eyfelt if his Preddycessors had done their Dooty. but none of 'em hadn't. They had let tn Orthogrufy of tn Country git into a Offal Shape sos at President Rooseyfelt had to set up mites to get it Simplifide. Linkin or Ol eiAll Dl -flNhAAAAtN tAA Nb e eANNNAiNNN to that but they Neglecked 1t. Then anuther thing. tn President haddent been in offs a week before he found at tn Constitushun was a Misfit an would haf to be Repaired somehow. Folles ust to think at Linkin under stood tn President Biszness some, but he fooled away his Time on tn Civil War an never Notised anything was Kong with tn Constitushun. McKin- ley mite "a seen what q Back Mum Der it was but he got Absorbed in tn War with Spane an tn Trubbles in tn Fillipeens an like as not he didn't observe no defecks into tn COnstitu- shun.
 About this time tn Nature Takers begun to overrun tn Country an President Rooseyfelt had to Squlch 'em. All this took time an added to tn Presidents work Before President Rooseyfelt got into offs they wasn't no Classification of Tyres an nobody hadn't no way to Know how many Different Kinds they was. Tn Pres ! dent he soon Redoosed tn Tyres to a | system. He put a tag onto each wun an his record was filed in tn Anias Club. They is Devided into severle ! Classes, tn False Tyres. tn Malishus Tyres. tn Mail Lyres. tn Femail Lyres and tn Sinister Lyres. Tn President l is gittin up a moo Classificashun. Tn l trends of tn President 1 understand it is to be called tn Dam ! Lyres. .I
 An while tn Presidents been doin' ! all this tn Bisness men an Captleists | of tn Whole Country entered upon | what's called d Carnivle of Crime i which Mister Rooseyfelt has had to i put down. You sec. James, tn offs ! of President ain't no job fer a Mary coddle." 1
 Do you think?" I asst my Paw, "'at | they'll be able to force Mister Roosey- ! felt to Undergo all them Hardships ! agin?"
 My Paw sez at he thinks they won't. sez he. Fer tn President has sent out | word that they mussent be no Fed I erie Offishles, like Postoffis Janiters an United States Marshals an Fed erie Judges in the next Convenshun. He's ordered at they shan't take no Intrust in Choosin Dellycates. If enuff of em would Disobey his Ear nest Orders an git into tn Couven- shun they might force tn Nommyna- shun onto him agin. You cuddent