The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1908-05-30


the fearful situation which confronts
u.s." said the Chief Decident at last
nights meeting of the Commotion
Committee, "for the town is going
crazy"
"How's that" inquired Booster who
had come armed with a miniature
yacht, a package of chewing gum and
letter of recommendation from Char
lie Hustace.
Crazy on the crest of moral
wave" said the Chief Decident, taking
a thirsty draught of the red ink.
Something's going to happen said
| Eleanor, Princess of Paradise, for
| Satan's had a shave, Boosters quit
drinking egg-lemonades at Chambers
O'Connors has refused to play baseball
on Sunday, Slogans cut down on ci-
gars, Warrington won't let Oilbright
risk his young life on the yacht Ha-
wall, Gibraltar Gee Myth has missed
an opportunity to call Hen Schell an
asteroid, Skinney has refused to read
Three Weeks, Molten Airs is writing
Decoration Day verses under the nom
de plume of A. vi. F., and Marlborough
ter insists on spending his vacation in
the city limits"
And Secretary Mott-Smith has
sworn off smoking" said OConnoTs.
And Marston Campbell is shutting
down on the counter-jumper head
lights, remarked Annie More.
And Captain Carter since the Iro-
quois got to going stern-foremost, has
quit smoking cigarettes" murmured
Satan
Beauty Babbitt has received a lot Of
clap pipes and cigarette holders from
the teachers" said O'Connors, land
evidently the pedagogs are quitting the
weed n al
"Hemenway says he'll resign before
he quits smoking" said Oilbright.
"Order!" shouted the Decident, I'VE
have here petition from Gorge All
Garter asking us to abolish person
alities; he says there is too much
personal business in the fleet commit
/ tee"
Move we refer it to Kidd" said Hen
! Schell
who's going to the boxing match
Saturday night?" asked Bob Breckons,
having gained admittance on a pro-
mise to leave his title with his shoes
on the mat outside.
Il have the list here announced
Molten Airs. Stage seats are reserv-
ed for Thwing, Martin, Scudder, A. F
Cooke, Lyle Dickey, Josh Rath Gas the
Bulletin of May q calls him. Moses
Nakuina and Breckons,"
"Horrible!" moaned Annie Marie
! Pleasequit.
Reserved" continued Airs, for the
| gentlemen named for the reason that
in the third round of the first go they
are to jump in and stop the scientific
exhibition, there being no other way
for them on this occasion to win their
cause"
why should they want to kill the
sport?" asked Booster being innocent
"As 1 said before" said the Decident
the town is going crazy Satan viii
explain"
rCertainly,' said Satan, 1T is simple
enough. Every once in SO often a mar
has to make a stir in his job or lost
the aforesaid. If he's shoveling Goa
he must get hustle on when the bos
approaches; if he's selling cigars h
must now and then ring up the casl
; register; ii he's painting pictures, h
, must occasionally turn out good one
if he's a governor he must sometime
deny what the papers say about him
la Carter; if he's on the payroll t,
evangelicate he must now and thel
} get up on his hind paws and shou
aloud that the town is on the slick an
generous road to the hot place. So i
it with Mister Thwing. He has bee
moved by the spirit of making goo
} and earning his salary"
Possessed of a devil" cried Molte
Airs.
Nothing of the kind; give the dew
his due" roared the Decident,
Three cheers for Bob Breckons
= warm old SPORT" yelled Pleasequit.
Hes got Roosevelt back of him,
declared Eleanor.
/ TThird term and the manly art {
. self defence, cried Dusty Roads.
Il thought you were a Democrat,
, remarked Mathedaughter.
+ so | was until taylor was name
for sheriff" said Dusty.
"That means Mathedaughter fC
Chief of Detectives" said Annie Nor,
Where does Iaukea come in?" in
quired Hen Schell and Gibraltar Ge
? in simultaneous breathings.
His son gets the deputyship an
Papa becomes Delegate to Congress. u
Nagaran tainted.
Doesn't Jack Atkinson get a joh'
asked Slogan
Hes Joined the Starvation Army