The bee., 1908-02-20
WOES OLA
BACHELOR
20 AaanY AftaIrs o. Iteart

I ~'~@NHSA w oHHAVNC VI Nn0 CVuIE0 luHA
Solomon pursued In having 1000
wives. and then saying all was vanity,
and failing to speak In a kindly man
ner OF womankind in general. ] be-
lieve In what II says In Proverbs-get
q dear and stay at home and cherish
her. am 40, and as good looking as
the next man MY means are ample
enough TO Keep a wife below the
third door Of fashionable boarding
house.
So you see have at least one good
trait
have had lots Of proposals, but
they were all from shopworn rem
nants. ! always believed a man should
choose his own wife instead Of being
chosen, 30 I refused them all.
Still, 30 far have found that every
woman / picked out for my wife has
not seen at to choose me. lr
The flrBt girl ever proposed to was
IL and as sweet a. a breath Of
June. She cried when asked the
question and said abe would tell
mamma.
That was Just what 1 did not want
her 10 do. Mamma was of the pouter
pigeon variety with wide girth, and
was very much afraid Of her. SO told
the girl 1t was harmless joke, and got
out before mamma came.
met that girl the other day. She
has gone her mother one better In
girth. She told me she was married,
had six children, and was perfectly
happy. So was /.
The next girl was a minister's
daughter. / was In love with her and
would have proposed had it not been
for, her mother. went to call on the
girl one night for the second time.
Her mother greeted me and asked my
intentions.
1t seemed to me as If she was hurry
ing matters little, so told her had
none.
She said ut was not fair to pay her
daughter such marked attention II 1
was not in earnest-it kept other suit
ors away"
So l staid away, and the girl mar
fied missionary and went to India
to five.
My next trial was with the daughter
of lady with whom boarded.
Kept this girl in candy, flowers, thea
ter tickets and rich food one whole
winter. 1 don't know why / ever pro
posed to her. except thought she ex-
pected it. However, 1 am thankful to
say she refused me-told me she was
going to marry a millionaire" and
liked my presumption.
She married a dry goods clerk. and
is still living at home with mamma
and making her own clothes.
Then l fell IN love with childless
widow. She seemed like a sensible
woman, and thought she would make
a good wife. She was sensible. all
right-wanted to know my income.
whether l owned any real estate. how
much my life was insured for, and
whether l had family burial plot.
l bade her hasty farewell.
There was the mother with the au-
burn-haired, sunburnt, freckled and
side-eyed daughter. The mother said
her daughter was a perfect jewel and
worthy of any mans love- Il was
sorry, but did not feel as if l were
a worthy casket.
Mrs. g., a widow of some 60 full
years. proposed to me. She had two
manly sons of over 30, neither OF
whom had ever toiled or spun. She
said her sons needed fathers kind
ly hand to guide them. 1 told her I
felt mine was not steady enough.
A woman who called herself a bach
elor maid wanted me. She was not a
fright, but so near it that most people
could not distinguish the difference.
Her proposal, while not elegant, was
novel. Hitting me slap on the back
one day. she said: What's the mat.
ter with us two getting tied up?"
Mel" l said, and ran for my life.
| think / have told enough to indi-
cate that, while bachelor may wear
a sunny smile, his heart is often !
heavy. But l will select my own |
wife or remain single.
/ would not be a man If | had not
fallen in love with an actress. This
one was dream that turned into q
nightmare. If it had not been for a
forgotten husband | would have been
married to her.
The trained nurse | had better luck
with. She accepted, but neglected to
-eil me she had also accepted fellow
N the next room. She gave me a
queer excuse for her action-said that
a all Aos. itals the nurses accepted
anything they could set o. OF a man
lit made them get well quicker
The last woman, so far, that l have
proposed to is a married one, living
With her husband. only asked her II
he would marry me when her hus-
'and died. "Bless your heart" she
laid. TON is as tough as wire nails,
md he will never die. But promise
o take you II he does. Now run
way and be happy until the time
,Omes."