davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

While Ed. and Mich. are at Reval. 1t would be interesting to know what brand they revel in. if they take any thing. wonder how an American julep would take? If they indulge in a spe- cial brand of wine, the maker of that brand will get an ad. that will boost him and his liquid about to the top.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

When a negro porter asked a pas- senger to remove from the platform of a moving train, the latter said: But I thought & platform was made to stand on." The dariey's reply was, ''No, sur, it's only made to git in on." That applies with equal aptness to some of the political platforms that are put out.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13
The @star-spansled Babe of Beth
 Iehem.o John c. Reed, in Uncle Remus's, The Home Magazine for June.

I had watched negro preachers from my infancy. never neglecting an op- portunlty. The most memorable one that 1 ever noted was Old Anthony, who I,exington. He would "holler," hardly ever saying anything intelligihle or consecutive One night in rare fit ithe star-spangled babe of Bethlehem '' and this gem 'fiamed in the foreh cad" of every sermon of his afterwards.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

The Indianapolis Star thinks 1t is possible that some of the Taft dele gates from tho South were really en- titled to seats. Well. what difference does 1t make. so they get the seats? That's all the administration cares fnr
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

.on,s fife. particularly as there were no direct descendants to listen to him; but as these facts were printed in sew eral histories and are supposedly known to all well-read people, there could be no harm in his pointing out that of, but inA spite of, his many errors Of "a efA and c0nduct
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13
sWORN CIRCULATTON.

The Montgomery Advertiser guarantees it's advertisers (and makes it a part of the contract when requested) that It's daily cir culation is larger than that of any morn, ing newspaper printed In Alabama-ana that its Sunday edition has the largest cir culation of any edition O. any newspaper printed in Alabama without exception
 The figures for May printed below repre- sent the actual net circulation. all returns having been deducted.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

He-Bsfore we become engaged l must tell you that I had a cousin who was hanged.
 she-Thats all right. I've got about thirty or forty that ought to be- Brooklyn Eagle.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13
A Little NOnsense.

"rhey say that tips for walters have greatly declined"
 'I never knew them to be"-Cleve- land Plain Dealer.
The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-06-13

c | FfnIgan. Circulation Manager of The Montgomery Advertiser. being duly sworn. says:
 The foregoing statement of The Adver tiserss circulation for the month of May. 1908 is true and correct, and compiled after all returns from newe boys, news agents. ducted c. FINI6AN,
 Circulation Manager. Sworn to and subscribed before me this eth day of June. 1908. RIGA ALEXANDER
 Notary Public.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
Fighting Forest Fires.

ASHLAND, Wis, Sept. pa thous-
and small fires surrounded Lakes Su.
perior and Huron and northern
Michigan. Captains of vessels ar
irving from the Minnesota shore give
details OF many unreported fires in
which homesteaders were burned out.
Four miles southwest of Ashland, all
the farmers lear the Bayfield, county
road are fighting fiercely, and hauling
water and trying to save their homes.
The village of Grand View on the
Omaha line near Mason is cut OFF from
commune alton, its fate being profile
NAUTICAL. Extensive fires are starting
on the Bal River Indian reserv alton,
and fire can be seen in all directions
from Odonah.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
Probing The Powder Trust.

WILMINGTON, Del, Sept. 22.-With
the beginning of the hearing here to-
day before William G. Mahaffey, spe.
cial referee, the government fred its
first gun in its antitrust lombard
ment of the so-called powder combine.
The suit promises to develop highly
sens ational evidence and will prob.
ably be one of the most important
that the government has yet brough,
against a corporation. The defend
ants are the E. l. du Pont de Nemours
company of this state and about sc
other powder concerns alleged to be
more or less controlled by the Della
ware corporation. Able attorneys
have been retained by the defendant
companies and the suit will be hard
fought.
The capitalization of the powder con
Germs named in the governments sui,
is in excess of $50, 900, 900. The same
principles are involved as in the
governments suit against the Stand
ard Oil company of New Jersey now
in progress.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
MULES OF MEXICO.
They Are Even More Knowing 1ha,
Our Own Meek Brand.

Everybody knows that all mules
are brainy, but the mules Of old Mex
leo have something on other mules for
a sort Of prescience Of their own said
a man who has spent many years in
the n%eighboring republic. "a Mexican
mule will do just so much work and
not q blamed bit more.
"The riding mule, for instance, is
fully aware Of the distance, down to a
rod, he is supposed and required to
traverse in the progress of one travel
ing day, and all the sharp sticks or
goads OF dynamite on earth won't get
him to do a bit more than what he
knows to be the correct distance. The
Mexicans have got a peculiar saying in
connection with this characteristic of
the Mexican mule. You ask q Mex
lean, for instance, how far it is by
mule back to such and such a point.
"'Two days journey If you are not
rushed, but three days if you are in a
hurry the Mexican will reply.
Ellis meaning is that if you don't
ask more of your mule than you should
ask of him, the mule Will be able to
make the trip in two days. But If you
attempt to drive the brute he'll soldier
on you, and in consequence the jour
ney will take you three days."-Ex-
change.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
BRYAN DEMANDS PROOF,
Democratic Candidate Resents State.
ment Made BY Roosevelt.

DETROIT. Sept. 22.-Brya an this at
ternoon telegraphed to President
Roosevelt demanding that he prove
the charges that Governor Haskell OF
Oklahoma, treasurer of the democratic
committee, is connected with the
Standard Oil companies, and that the
Standard Oil is back of Bryan in this
campaign. In the telegram Bryan
said:
"ln the statement given out by you,
you endorse the charges against Gov.
ernor Haskell that he was once in the
employ OF the Standard Oil company,
and that in such employ he was con.
nected with an attempt to bribe OF
influence Attorney General Monnett Of
Ohio to dismiss suits pending against
the Standard.
I'm endorsing the charge you attack
the democratic party and it's can
didates. saying that Governor Haskell
stands high in the councils of Mr..
Bryan. You add that the public alton
OF this correspondence not only mere.
~ justi6es in striking fashion, bu,
also casts a curious side light on the
attacks upon the administr alton, both
in Denver and in Bryan's campaign.
"This charge is so serious that l
cannot allow it to go unnoticed.
Haskell denied that he was ever EN-.
ployed by the Standard Oil company
in any capacity or ever connected
with it in any way.
"Haskell demanded an investiga.
ton at the time the charge was made,
offering to appear and testify. He de-
mands an investigation now. l agree
with you that if Haskell is guilty he
is not fit to be connected with the
democratic committee. l am sure you
agree with me, If be is innocent he de-
serves to be exonerated from 50 damn.
ing an accusation. AS to the selec.
ton of Haskell as chairman of the re.
solutions committee in Denver and
also treasurer of the national COM
ittee, he had my approval and endorse
ment."
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
ODD USES FOR S
One Makes a Good Barometer, Another
a Weathercoek.


Fishes have been put to many queer
uses while still alive, but probably the
strangest was that suggested to the
war department by an inventor. The
propulsion of submarine torpedoes was
the subject under discussion, and he
proposed that a shark be imprisoned
in a tube at the G end of the proiec-
tile, its movements to be controlled by
the active application of electricity.
In case the shark attempted to swim
away it was to he given an electric
shock and in this way kept on its
course until the torpedo had reached
its target.
Another remarkable use to which a
fish has been put Is as q barometer.
The leach is very susceptible to atmos-
pheric changes, and when retained in
an aquarium is likely to throw itself
out at the approach of or during any
remarkable change Of wind or wealth
er, or if in a pond OF stream will some
times jump or the bank. It has been
kept alive in aquaria as a living ba-
rometer from the s%upposition that GER
tain movements indicate particular
changes that are about to occur in the
weather. In Russia the dead body Of
Cottus gobio. the miller's thumb. is
used as a weathercock. Hung by a
single thread, it will point to the direc-
ton whence the wind blows.-Minne-
apolis Journal.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
EXPERIENCE VS.. EXPERIMENT.

In these days when the career of a
public official has become a micro.
scopic study, the most profound and
sincere compliment that can be paid
a man entrusted with authority is to
be selected by his party to succeed
himself. OF the ten republicans in the
capitol today eight have been nomin-
ated to succeed themselves and one OF
the remaining two was not a candi.
date.
Sentiment nc longer governs the &C.
tons of political gatherings, and
there is no doubt that the convention
at Helena chose the men who can poll
the biggest vote next November. That
this popularity is based upon a past
official record is a matter Of utmost
qualification, not only to the party,
but to the men who have been so hon
Ored.
To succeed the present democratic
governor and his lieutenant, the re.
publicans have selected men OF the
highest type of citizenship, both of
them have been entrusted with public
Office and have demonstrated their
ability and integrity when the pos.
session OF both qualities involved
matters of grave concern to the com.
mOnwealth.
So it is that the republican ticket as
contrasted with that of the democrats
offers a choice between experience and
experiment. Apart from any ques-
tions of national concern, and there
is not much national politics in this
state election-the issue is "shall the
men who have faithfully carried out
the pledges they made to the people
four years ago be returned to Office or
shall the state government be turned
over to a squad OF untried, INFESTED
aspirants:'
Montana has passed the period of
haphazard experiment.. The republic
can nominees deserve the tribute &C.
corded them by their party. The Hell
ena selection will undoubtedly be rati.
fed at the polls.-Butte News.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
The Deceased Wife's Sister.

The law against marrying a deceased
wife's sister, which caused so much
discussion in England, grew out Of
the ancient tribal law forbidding a IA
Their to sell more than one daughter to
the same man when the Briton was
emerging from polygamy and when
for p shillings Of the present money
a man might dismiss his wife or kill
her if she would not go. AS civil law
it was to protect the living wife and
knit tribes closer together by inter
marriage. When ecclesiastical law be.
came supreme a misleading of some
Scripture text was used to put the
sister of a mans wife among the pro.
hibited degrees Of relationship. This
was the act Of 1541 (3o Henry VI1D;
"a man may not marry his deceased
wife's sister or her daughter, but he
may marry his first cousin."-London
Standard.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30

h~''er, however, i. be for that: for
yet was a popular rator who
was a mau OF judgment 10 affairs.
Greatest of thinkers and statesmen
who have spoken English was Burke:
but he was III orator at all. His or.
atoms are immortal in print, but he
never could hold or please an and.
fence. The thinker never is q popular
speaker and the popular speaker never
be depended on a. a practical
man of action.
Whether Taft will gain strength by
going out on the speaking tours he
proposes may be doubted. He will
talk sense, but will not deliver it in
the manner Of a spellbinder. He will
not carry the average audience into
realms of imaginative delight, where
the real facts of life appear in an in.
verted order. 1t is not his gift to
make audiences drunk with ecstacy and
to make them think they see the things
that are not. Nor was it the gift of
Abraham Lincoln. His speeches were
plain and quiet, yet direct utterances.
Merely as an orator he was no match
for Douglas.
Thus far our people have not been
greatly moved, certainly they have
not been controlled by campaign
('1oy- opd nou~1oS - ,--
in their time, so was Blaine.
And so is Bryan. Following the an
alogies, We should suppose Bryan
would not prevail. He has not pre-.
vailed hitherto. But we do not say
the times have not changed and that he
may not find success now. O~ratory,
however, mere oratory, the trick and
skill and gift of speaking in public for
Identification Of audiences, has not
hitherto prevailed in the United States.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
No More Hard Times.

"Gentlemen,' said the man on the
rea platform of the street car to five
or six others of US, ''there is to be no
more hard times. The last of the panic
has vanished
"How do you make that out?" was
asked.
~ saw Bryan at Denver and had a
long talk with him. In fact, l went
there for the purpose. We sat down
like two old chums, and | told him
that times were SO tight in the east
that many Of US couldn't get a glass
Of beer { week. He is going to estab-
lish 1000 free breweries as soon as he
takes his seat.
Then l told him about the high
price of neat. He doesn't eat it and
had heard nothing about it. He
promptly said, however, that he would
put the best porterhouse steaks into
the market, from his farm in Nebraska
at eight cents q pound. He said sever
at first, but told him we would glad,
ly pay eight.
Then told him how potatoes ant
other vegetables had advanced, anl
he promised to look into the matter a
once. | suggested the hanging of abou
100 farmers and 200 grocers as a grea
moral lesson and he said he woult
think of it seriously.
"Then l told him that shoes hat
jumped fifty cents a pair in the las
year and he could hardly believe it
He is going to furnish 1000, 900 COW
hides and open 100 shoe factories, an.
you'll see the price drop to 81 a pair
And. lastly, l told him about tn
scarcity of money with us, and b
made q memorandum on a piece O
paper that he was to send 800, OO0, 90,
east next day and have trusty agent
see that we all got our share. Whoop
Hurrah. Anybody that don't want t,
live now ought to be kicked to dealt
by a mule"
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
President May Take Stump.

WASHINGTON, Sept. 22.-It is stated
that upon his return to Washington
today President Roosevelt will be
urged by republican politicians to
take the stump in behalf of Taft.
Such action on the part of q chief
executive of the nation would be Who'll.
ly without precedent, and it is not
considered likely that the president
will consider such a proposition I'm.
less it should appear absolutely
necessary to insure republican cue
cess.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
They Want American Beef.

CHICAGO, Sept. 22.-Thos. Ersdine,
the British consul at Chicago, acting
for the British war Office, today closed
a contract with Libby Mcneil & Lib
by, the packers, for 5000, 900 pounds
of fresh beef for $500, OOO. This is the
first order from the British govern.
ment. since the appearance of "The
Jungle"
Mr.. Ersdine requested the submits.
sion of bids on several million pounds
of canned meat for the British navy
The packers r pleased over the or
ders and predict an increase in the
export trade.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
ORATORY mi VOTES,

The brilliant campaign orator gem
orally falls down in the matter OF
securing votes. That is the conclu-
sion reached by the Portland Ore
CONAN in a review Of former presi.
Dental campaigns in which the can.
didate who was the most popular
orator failed to win at the ballot box.
In making a comparison between the
rival presidential candidates as cam
paign orators, the Oregonian says:
Bryan is an excellent popular
stumper; Taft is not. The popular
orator pleases the miscellaneous audi.
ence, yet Bryan never says anything
of Importance. He does his work Of
an actor. And in oratory, "action il
eloqueuce, and the eyes Of the multi
tude more learned than their ears
Probably the greatest popular speake,
our country ever knew was Henri,
Clay. His charm was unequaled. l
captiv ated all who heard him: ant
the matter Of his speeches was better
than Bryan's. But he failed, though
often nominated, to reach the presi
dency. Those who heard him wer'
not convinced. 1t may be that tn
times have so changed, and tina
severity of thinking has been lost witt
change of the times, that Bryan nov
may accomplish what Clay neve
could. But hitherto the ''vox ct prae
terea nihil'' has not sufiiced to con
vince the people OF the United State
or to prevail with them.
Taft makes good and sound speeche
but he is not an orator. All tn,
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
Brittle Lizards,

Some kinds of lizards break in two
when suddenly startled. In the bush
in Australia the traveller often comes
reptiles basking OF a log or piece of
old bark. AS soo as they perceive
the invader there is n great commotion.
They dart hither and thither so quick
ly that the eye can scarcely follow
their movements. The effects of the
shock are evident from the quantity Of
wriggling tails lying about which have
been cast off in the hurry, while the
mutilated owners may be seen scurry-
ing away to safety still waggins the
stumps that remain.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
Density Of City Population.

Although there Is a certain area Of
about three and a half acres on Man.
haitian Island where the density Of
population is at the rate Of 100000 to
the square mile, yet the city Of Paris
shows a far greater average density
Of population than New York, the fig
ures for Paris being 10000 a square
mile and for New York city proper
10000 a square mile. The average
density Of London's population is 3d.
600 n square mile and that Of Berlin
81. 6OO.-Federation Review.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
The Famous Four.

Each Of the following named gentle
men, upon being out late with the
boys, has concocted a famous excuse
and. what is more wonderful. got away
with 1t. They are: Jonah, Ulysses, Rip
Van Wrinkle. Robinson Crusoe.-Judge.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30

This bank solicits accounts, and
offers to depositors absolute security,
prompt and careful attention, and the
most liberal treatment consistent with
safe and profitable banking. Buys
and sells foreign exchange, drawing
direct on all principal American and
European cities, and issues Its own
Letters of Credit.
Interest paid on time deposits. The
highest cash price paid for approved
state, county, city and school bonds
and warrants.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
A Quicker Nav.

Young Minister (searchins 70, mir
ror)-Have you q glass here? Beadle-
Ma, ma. sir: we dinna need a glass. We
Jist tax Il sock cot o tn boottle.-Lon-
don Taller.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30
A Cheerful Soul.

Creditor (determineGly)-1 shall cali
at your house every week until you
pay this account. sir. Debtor Tin the
blandest Of tones)-Then, sir, there
Seems every probability Of u &C.
craftsmanship ripenins into friendship.
London Tit Bits.
The river press. [volume] (Fort Benton, Mont.) 1880-current, 1908-09-30

Parties wishing to purchase live
stock will find some attractive offer
iuys in our advertising columns.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-09-12


The natives on some Of the Pacific
islands. being provided with neither
metals nor any stone harder than the
coral rocks Of which the atolls they
tnhabIt are composed. would seem bad
ly on. indeed, for material Of which
to make tools or weapons were II not
that their very necessity has bred an
Invention no less ingenious than curl.
Gus and effective. This Is nothing less
than the use OF sharks teeth to give a
cutting edge to their wooden knives
and swords. The mouth of the shark
contains 800 teeth arranged In Ave
rows. all closely lying upon each other.
except the outer row. and 80 construct
ed that as one tooth Is broken or lost
another takes its place. The teeth
are not only pointed and keen edged.
but are finely and regularly serrated.
20 that the cutting power Is greatly In
creased. Indeed, so great faculty
have these teeth for wounding that the
implements and weapons upon which
they are used have to be handled with
great care. The Klngmlll islanders
make many strange articles Of sharks
teeth.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-09-12
Her sunday Knitting.

Years ago." said an Auburn woman
eighty years young, lit was count
ed a sin among the good wives Of the
little Maine town where | was born to
waste a single moment Of time.
have heard my grandmother tell the
story OF one dame who much scandal
lied the church people on one never to
be forgotten occasion. People who
went early to church were surprised
one Sabbath morning to see Aunt Bet
81 sitting away up in front. gray yarn
stockings in her hands and her knit
ting needles clicking merrily away IS
she worked. The minister stopped In
surprise as he passed her on his way
to the pulpit. but the old lady was not
one whit disturbed by his disapprov-
ing air Smiling serenely, she said
complacently: Thought I'd knit a
stitch while the people are gathering.
I never was one to waste a minute,
elder And the good dame continued
to click her needles, while the Mortified
minister FASTENED to his desk. Not
I'LL he began his sermon did Aunt Bet
sy lay aside her Sunday knitting
work. "-Kennebec Journal.
Coeur d'Alene evening press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1907-1929, 1908-09-12
carlxIa Was q rsrror.

The domestic infelicity of the Car
lyles is common knowledge. but it IL
not inappropriate to give Mrs. Carlyle's
view of her husband IF he would
only be satisfied she used to some.
times complain of Carlyle. but
have had to learn that when he does
not find fault he Is pleased. and that
has to content me-"
On one occasion when Carlyle was
away from home Mrs Carlyle busted
herself to get all in perfect order for
her husbands arrival, and when all
was complete-his dinner 'eady, his
armchair in its usual position, his pipe
and tobacco prepared. all looking as
comfortable as possibe-Mrs. G. sat
down at last to rest and to expect him
with a quiet mind. He arrived, and
after he had greeted me, what do you
think he did? He walked to the win.
dow aud shook 1t and asked. Where's
the wedge of the Window And until
we had found that blessed wedge moth.
ing would content him. He said the
window would rattle and spoil ALL"