The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1908-11-25

hibited picture of Satan walking arm
in arm with a Boston alderman that
had sold his vote for $4,000, and there
was applause lasting seven minutes.
The next picture was Faith clinging
to the cross. had great hopes that
this would bring the audience back
into the straight and narrow path, but
was doomed to disappointment She
was advised to go home and go to
darning stockings, and when l would
have expressed my surprise at such
sacrilege some one threw turnip and
hit me on the jaw
From thence on l exhibited only pic
lures showing that the wages of sin
are from four to ten dollars a day.
with board and washing and theater
tickets thrown in, and the audience
Went wild with enthusiasm / could
not close my eyes to the fact that the
drift of the times was toward wick
edness and that the travelling agents
of family Bibles must be living on on
ions and sleeping in fence corners.
Next day while was driving over
the highway from Jump OF to Stop
Here I met cavalcade Of three horse
men on the road. AS usual thing.
when meet cavalcade my innocent
face, venerable whiskers and dignified
bearing insure me respect In most
cases the cavalcade removes its hats
and bows low before me. In this case,
as sign Of the degeneracy of the
times, the cavalcade halted, and the
leader asked me what would take
for my whiskers. I had not yet recoy-
cred from my establishment when an
other man dismounted and climbed up
on the wheel Of my wagon and actual.
ly gave tug at my whiskers to see If
they were false. Then they called me
old man and old boy and old hoss and
one Of them tried to spit tobacco juice
in my fighting dogs eyes. AS drove
on 1t just did seem to me that the end
Of the world was ut hand. In imagina.
ton could see the destruction OF
Sodom and hear the yells Of its perish.
ing inhabitants.
Having reached the town itself, OBJ
served that spirit of levity and gay
ETY. pervaded the place, but thought il
might be owing to the fact that there
was q man in town from Denver try.
ing to sell folding bathtubs and hair
brushes. l opened my show by intro
ducing Pilgrim Joe's Alternative
which is we'll known remedy fol
drawing folks back from the grave.
had scarcely announced that tine price
still remained 25 cents notwithstand
Ing the panic when crowd began tt
boot. In selling this alternative l usu
ally tell little story. 1t is about {
fond mother whose sunny haired littl.
boy gets in the way Of brick hous,
and is crushed TO a pulp. The mothe
sits grieying over the remains ant
| wailing out that there is no more hap
piness for her on this earth when al
angel comes flying down with bottl,
Of my justly celebrated remedy in he
hand. She pats the grieving mother. OF
the head and then sprinkles some O
the alternative over the remains O
the child. In five minutes he is chas
ing grasshoppers and the mother /
laughing In glee and wondering whel
the next circus will come along.
Seeing that the crowd at Stop Her,
was little out Of humor, started Il
to tell this story, but 1t brought missile
instead of tears and smiles. A major
ity Of those missiles collided with N.
sacred body. and for the only time fl
thirteen years I was somewhat embar
raised. passed the picture along AM
substituted "The Discovery Of Amerl
co." No good. They threw tobacco cud
at Christopher as he stood and gaze
upon America. substituted the ''Tw,
Orphans" but the ragged and starving
little girls, wandering around in
snowstorm at night in search Of fod
der and sympathy, were advised t
cut it out. In desperation changed II
the most sacred picture In the collec
ton, which represents field of battl'
at night after the fighting. There ar,
dead and wounded scattered about
and instead Of being on their roost.
and asleep thousands of buzzards ar'
lowering DER the scene. There are an
gels there weeping DER the dead o.
praying with the wounded and othe
angels with clubs whacking away a
the buzzards.
When l exhibited this picture In til,
towns Of Step High. Go On, Merry /
and Who Cares, there were such tear
and sobs as produced wave of infu
| enZa all through the state. and hun
dreds of men rode from ten to fifty
-1les to tell me that they would moi