Evening bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1895-1912, 1908-11-23
FRIENDS
tBy l.. S. Goodhue. MD, Holualoa,
Hawali)
I aaaaa naaa aaanaa

In need" may be. | do not think that
this aphoristic conception of his re-
lation to us Is quite worthy of the
real Office of true friend.
It Is the friend we do not need
financially but morally and socially.
year in and year out, who gives us
a sense of sure foundation and makes
life not only enjoyable but potential.
Few of us ever have occasion to
call on friend for material aid, or
at least, we all Of us try hard so to.
arrange our business affairs that our
own reserves may be available for
accidents and contingencies.
l am afraid that even our true
friends would regard MS ask
ance If we considered them valuable
assets to our personal finances. Har-
old Skimpole friends may be enter
tanning and lovcable, but for man
who earns his bread by the sweat OF
his brow, they may prove uncomfort-
ablo partizans.
The man of good business sense Is
suspicious OF such characters. and his
grounds are probably reasonable.
OF course. there are cases where
financial support or direct assistance
OF friend is timely and legitimate,
and quite In the line of disinterested
friendship, but men who need this
sort OF aid even in tsieir sOrest straits,
are very slow to accept any proffer
until they have tried every other avail.
able source which may be secured
on strictly business lines.
Sad experience has shown that
those who are In the habit Of apply.
Ing readily to their friends for loans
or ACCOMPLISHMENTS, urc also In the
habit of repudiating their obligations
aud breaking up their friendships and
often their friends in the bargain. The
experience so well rendered by the
poet Is an old one:
AT length with money came my
friend, which peasec me wondrous
well | got my money but my friend
away quite from me fell. Now. had
| money and my friend. as | have
had before, I'd keep my money and
my friend. and play the fool no more.''
a sadder experience and perhaps a
less common one, is where both mon,
ey and friend come up missing.
However, this only shows that the
| borrower was never n real friend. He
| would have payed back. If not In
money. in the more valuable grati
tudc Of sincerely honest heart
| know man whose friend lost
him $500. and yet he remains Loyal
TO this friend. and would resent the
least suggestion of blame against him
He Is a rare philosopher, let us con
Tess. But he Is also n true friend
I do not believe that we ever lose
a friend; once friend always c
/ friend.
But we are often deceived by in
sincerity, dishonesty and disloyalt,
playing the role of disinterestet
friendship.
Or the well-meaning have failed Il
stand the test which comes to al
sooner or later; the test OF, real af
lection and regard.
"Et tn. Brute" IL painful bu
sometimes necessary exclamation ris
ing out of the depths Of experience
The one we have depended upon
goes over to the enemy. He has hi
excuses no doubt. but his stab touch
es the quick, nothing can quite undo
II.
One of the kecnost thrusts | eve
suffered came from friend who's,
companship | still remember with ;
,pang.
He was in great financial distress
reedy to the point of wanting none.
to get away from the scene of his dis
appointments.
He came to me with tears In hi
eyes, and with tears I'm my heart
said, Take this" handing him all tn
available cash had.
II want no note: pay the amour
back when you are able"
He took the money, one hundre
dollars, went away and entered ne,
work In a place.
He was successful In his new vel
. ture, wrote me of comforts that h
was able to get his family, but not
word about the money had let hin
have.
After few years ] myself needle
money very badly, so | wrote to m
friend asking him If he could spar
the 500; asking him in u way whic
put me in the place of IA borrower.
His reply came, vigorous, harsh.
He needed the money, too. ! ha
told him that he could pay 1t bac
when he was ready. Well, ] coul
wait or go to H for II.
That was all.
] always feel the sting of this II
gratitude.
| folded the letter up, and after
few days, ! addressed It to my frien
adding note, stating that | was sun
he would want the letter back In hi
own possession and not mine; that
'any case II must not be where
could remind me of him.
Did ! forget him as he used to be
Not at all. ] have since defended h
name and character from attacks.
And ] recognize that his faults M
those of temperament. and that d
may In time suppress them sulicien
ly to make him safe and loyal frien
The worth of friend, too, Is dt
| in great measure to our sense I
faith and security in his friendship
that no matter what happens he wi
be friend If we truly remain his.
1t Is something like the confdenC
of business men In the financial stall
lily to the country
In that confidence almost any grei