The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-08-05

How queer!" whispered Mrs. Bow
ser.
IT don't see anything queer about
it. In fact, I've wondered that some
enterprising Journal didn't ask for it
long ago. They have simply over
looked a good thing
But what can have happened in
your life to interest any one?"
What What! A hundred things.
A thousand things Keep quiet for
a few minutes and I will show you
how 1t starts off,
as If he had been saving wood. and
his forehead damp with moisture, Mr..
Bowser read as follows:
ION the night of Mr.. Bowser's
birth a barn near by was struck by
lightning, a horse fell into a pond
robbed. and a carpenter named Jones
was murdered in his bed. 1t will thus
be seen that our HERO
There was a ring at the front
door, and as the girl was out Mr.. Bow
ser answered the bell. The caller was
and was directed at the other end of
the block and told to inquire for Brown
If he couldn't find Green.
THAT our hero did WHAT" asked
Mrs. BowSer as the historian returned
and resumed his seat.
THAT is as far as I shall write this
evening, as 1 wish to go slow and turn
out a finished article. 1 have the re-
mainder in my head, however. 1 shall
go on and say that one could have
safely predicted a life full of stirring
adventures from these early incidents.
The subject of our sketches was
hardly three months old when he was
left alone in his cradle one day. The
doors of the house were open, and
while the child slept and smiled
Ting-a-ling, went the bell, and Mr..
Bowser answered it to find a woman
on the steps who wanted to know If
his name was Johnson, and If he had
thrown beer key at her boy Robert
that day. 1t took him five minutes to
get rid of her, and as he came scuffing
back Mrs. Bowser asked:
Did bear come in and devour
the baby, or did the cook strike for
higher wages? hope no tragedy hap
pened?"
LAS was the baby, and as 1 am
still living. I wasn't devoured," he
answered. "I shall finish that para
graph by stating that a gypsy entered
the house to steal me. and he was al
ready carrying me off in his arms,
when faithful dog attacked him and
defeated his object
What was the color of the dog?"
What difference does that make %
II wouldn't wiring in brindle dog
If / were you"
Mr.. Bowser sat gIaring at her and
swallowing the lump in his throat
when the bell tinkled again. 1t was a
stranger and he asked if Mr.. Bowser
had dogs for sale. If so, he wanted a
pug with a twist in his tail, providing
the price was not beyond his means.
The reply was SO full of exclamation
points and plain English words that
the dog hunter held his breath until
he got out of the gate and around the
corner.
Then the bold, bad gypsy didn't
succeed in carrying you off ?" queried
Mrs. Bowser.
IF he had would I be here now?
By thunder. If that bell rings again
somebody will get hurtI"
Yes, but go on. Don't you see how
excited I amp"
We'll, at the age of one year this
wonderful child could walk. talk and
neighborhood. He was hardly a year
and half old when he and his sis
ter were attacked by large black
snake as they were playing in the yard
one day. The sister screamed in
terror, but the young hero"
The bell interrupted again. and Mr.
Bowser went to the door and found a
second woman-that is, it was the
first woman with a different look on
her face. She had returned to ask if
ms name WASH Scnemernorn, and II
he wasn't the party who got her hus-
band drunk two nights before and
then robbed him of a Waterbury
watch Mr.. Bowser yelled at her once,
twice, thrice, and he escaped. When
he had shut the door Mrs. Bowser
was ready to say:
please hurry up. 1 am dying to
hear what the young hero did, but
don't tell me that he failed to save his
sister,
mo, he did not fail. He grabbed
up Ratchet and Drained the serpent,
and by the beard of Captain Kidd if
any one else gets me to that door to-
night I'll brain him.
Does a serpent have brains?"
Certainly. Every living thing but
women have them. Now. keep quiet
for minute and let me go on. I shall
say that at the. age of two years young