The Huttig news., 1908-04-04
MANHATTAN'S
BATH
Billy Was enthusiastically In
Favor of Icy Piunges

|
haitian is fond of saying to his friends,
let me hand you bit of advice about
this bathing thing. Cut out the warm
baths you've been in the habit of TAX
ing every morning. Fill the old tub
up to the vent notch with the coolest
kind of water that will run out of the
faucet. Then jump in, swash around
for about two minutes with a big
cake of soap and sponge, and then
! jump out and rub coarse crash
! towel over your body. If you don't
feel like a brace of fighting cocks,
don't want cent
That's the way Mr. Manhattan has
! been talking for years. He says it
doesn't make any difference how niany
times young fellow has crooked his
elbow the evening before or how many
strong cigars he may have burned up
in the course of the session-if he'll
just tumble into that cold brooklet
that flows into every we'll regulated
home there'll be nothing to it.
Makes you new man." he'll tell
you. "Freshens you up for the rest
Of the day. After you get through,
you go into the dining-room and the
way you mutilate the country sausage
and flannel cakes is enough to make
your wife give you hard look. Don't
slip me any of that stuff about not
being able to eat in the morning.
Nothing in it, son, take it from me.
Everybody can eat in the morning if
they'll play the game l play. Look at
me. Don't look exactly like an under
study for the party of the first part
in neurological contract, do 1?
Betcher life l don't I'm hard as nails
and twice as sharp, I'm here to prom
Use you. Got a string of life insur-
ance writer's lined up in the hall lead
ing to my fiat fighting among them;
selves to make me policy. No chance
for the company to lose for another
hundred years or so. And cold baths
have done it, son, cold baths and moth
ing else"
AS matter of fact, Mr.. Manhattan
took a cold bath in the autumn of
1905. He got in the tub one morning
the hot water tubes weren't working,
and after he had got over suffering
and was out on the cork mat again
rubbing himself dry, he wasn't at all
sure he hadn't enjoyed the novelty.
He told himself he'd take a cold bath
every morning of his life after that.
He took the plunge next morning
and emerged radiantly. He took 1t
| for a week or so and began to feature
himself in his talk with his friends.
| He allowed there was only one way
| for a grown-up man to start the day,
and that was to souse his person in
water that was just one degree re-
moved from the temperat4re OF an
! ice cream freezer after the cream had
been friz Then along came cold
| morning, a proper cold morning, and
as Mr.. Manhattan regarded the frigidi
| bath it seemed to sheer at him. He
! shivered and put his hand in the tub.
Then he turned back to his shaving.
Suddenly he laid aside the razor and
reached over to the tub. He switched
the faucets. The hot water poured in.
..Tll Just take the air off this BATH"
said Manhattan. A week later he was
going at the bath as he had gone at
it most of his life-a tub filled with
warm water in which he could recline
and doze and enjoy himself thorough
ly He has never taken a cold bath
since.
Every morning after Mr.. Manhattan
has taken his bath and finished shaw
ing he turns on the same sort of
water for Mrs Manhattan. Only he
doesn't tell her it is the same style
"Gee," he says to her. 81 don't see
how you can go against that game,
honest, l don't. 1t gives me the
Willies just to think Of soaking my
brains in that sort of soup. Why
don't you be sporty and take flop in
the cold stuff"
Mrs. Manhattan tells him that in
the first place she doesn't necessarily
soak her brain when she takes bath,
and in the second place she isn't SO
constituted that cold bath seems
good to her
Mr.. Manhattan took the big sleep
the other night, after he had put in
dDOuC Ten IlOulo a. WV Aoilpl ltLhiI
and quit so far to the bad he was dis
gusted. Mrs. Manhattan, contrary to
usual custom, got up first that day,
and after she had bathed thoughtfully
turned on the cold water for her mate
When Mr., Manhattan reached the
bathroom he shaved abstractedly.
thinking all the while of the game of
the night previous, and paying no at
tention to the full tub. This he &C.
cepted without question. He had for
gotten he had not turned the water on
himself, and when he had made his
face presentable he sank leisurely into
the water.
Mrs. Manhattan, in alarm over the
shrek of agony which her husband
emitted, knocked fearsomely at the
door. Manhattan, now out of the icy
plunge and shivering on the mat,
scowled so furiously Mrs. Manhattan
would have tainted had she been able
to see through the door, What's the
matter dear?" asked the lady, who
boasts of Billy's cold bathing propensi-