The sun., 1908-12-13
HTs WIFE LAUGHED.
enc knew ono Jeke and Taat was Enough
90 satisfy Her.

There's no place like home.' exploded
Uncle Henry. after she was safely out OF
ear shot, "and. by gracious. I'm glad OF It,
5ee what / mean2 Every freside the
cradle Of liberty. as the Teller says. Then
along comes your wife and rocks the
cradle,
'No, sir. I'm downy bird. am; and
take 1t from me. this home sweet home
gig isn't going to cash any policy slip |
ever saw. Not until they do something
to give women sense of humor.
"Now. get this right. They can appre-
oiate joke. You hear me. Some Of
the best laughers in the wide, wide world
right now are wearing high heeled shoes
and imported hair.
yes. stree. they can appreciate joke.
II they oan see it they can. That's It.
There you have it. son. II they can see
iti That's the trouble. They seldom
see 1t.
-Listen here. Did you see her laugh
as she went out2 Eh? Well. sir. just
told her a joke, regular kind Of funny
joke Is she laughing at my joke, SOM
She is not Then what the blazes is she
laughing at? You don't know, don't
know. she don't know. Can you beat itf
Answer: No. you cannot beat It, 4
sits a good joke too. Heard it down
town. Seems one OF the boys was up in
Maine this summer and just as he was
getting over TO Rattlesnake Creek he
heard a terrible swimming going on there.
He went down to the shore and there on
the other side of Rattlesnake Creek was a
big turtle crawling away
He says the turtle had two rings on
his tail and one button on the end. and his
shell was mottlei yellow and red. He
says the two rings probably were for the
turtle to 60 ahead, because that's what
the turtle was doing. And when he saw
the button on the end Of the tail he knew
he'd seen the turtles finish.
that's some story. Eh? But listen
here. got to thinking about that story
and up and asks him how he makes it
out that turtle could have rings and a
button on his tail. Rattlesnakes are the
only critters that have them. He said
that was easy, because when he first
saw the turtle on the other side Of Rattle
snake Creek he knew in IN instant 1t was
a cross.
DO you get that? guess that's bad.
BY gum. II cost me a dollar sixty to find
out about that cross. but 1t was worth
it. took cigar myseh. because I was
coming right home and didn't want any
argument. Here, smoke that when you
get outside. Wife objet to to the smell
around the house.
well, sir, says, says /, Home for mine,
where in the sacred precincts Of my own
vine and fig tree l says, I'll hand that
one over the plate to nv soft voiced
spouse says I, and it will tie her up,
/ says. into a shaking and complicated
tangle Of blithesome merriment, says /.
opiDed that my paths would be In sunny
places and sweet peace would brood over
me. to the third and fourth generation
thereof Selah!
$50 came home. and, take it from me,
gave 1t out to her in plain words. No
hidden subtleties. you understand. but
full OF corroborative detail and. believe
me, son. with the bright light of truth and
virtue flashing from my clear blue eye.
you never heard me when was right
in top form, maybe? Well, son, the way
/ told her that story was right. See
what mean2 The turtle wouldn't have
had any comeback If he had heard it
And did she laughp Did abe give that
merriment?- Not a sort. Nothing Of the
kind. Nix. She looked me square in the
face and she said: Well, what about it?'
says she. Go ahead and tell the joke
saws she.
SAY, that'got me mad. Iwouldnt have
minded il she had been kidding me, but
she wasn't. was sore all over and /
,,al,ttohaI rtnhfnnt,0 irI f,o.,
began to hand things out all in bunch.
1 combed things over pretty general
one way and another until. II give you my
word, couldn't think Of anything more to
say that dared to, women being unnec-
sarily touchy at times:
''You're the limit, ] says, as kind Of
windup.. I don't believe you ever saw
wouldn't laugh IL you did, says.
Henry she says just as serious, I
don't know but one real funny joke and
I've known that long time, she says, and
every once in a while laugh naysels SICK
over it, she says. It's an awfully funny
joke she says, and one is enough for
any woman. she says that's respectable
s'Weil. for the love Of mackerel, put me
wise,' says 1. No. Henry she says,
you wouldn't like it at all. And besides
she says, / don't want to hurt your feel
ings, she says. And then. take 1t from
me. she laid her head back and laughed
like he'd have Mysteries.
Honest. can you beat it? As man to
man and without reference to any pres
ent, previous. or contemplated condition
of servitude. what do you know about
thatp That gets me, all right. There's
a woman who only knows one joke and
misses q chance to tell it. don { know,
son. sometimes I give itup. These women
are a queer lot