The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1908-09-16
CINCINNATI HATH SCOT
AND CHARLES P. TAFT
Undyng Claims to Fame Abound in This Second Pitts
burg, Through Whose Perpetual Pail of Smoke
Miracles Are Performed

CINCINNATI, Ohio. Sept. IS -Aiany
OF the letters which come &C Judge
Tafts Offices make inquiries as to what
kind Of city Cincinnati is
The alI-pervadIng suspicion in the
public mind that Cincinnati has fea-
lures TO make K notable and famous is
well founded. II is q remarkable city.
a town which causes wonder in the
MINIS! at tho visitor and resignation in
the heart Of the resident.
In the first place, II is the only rival
Piirsburs has TO fear ina the smoke
and SCOT business. Tt is the real big
smoke of this part OF the country
When il SHOWS ia Cincinnati, the con
gealed rain water IS black by the time
IL comes within striking distance OF the
highest roof in sight There is no sale
OF ink here. When It rains. which is
seldom, the frugal natives put a quart
can in the area way, and five minutes
later can be seen industriously filing
their fountain pens.
The CRIME OF the town does not get
on yau. II gets into you. and nothing
short 0; a hydraulic drin or a surgical
operation can separate # from you
Chocolate ice cream is alb the rage In
TIE drug stores, because, II you order
vanilla, it gets brown as chocolate from
the flying cindcrs before You can eat
H. II you go into a restaurant and are
handed a piece Of butter without
coat Of SCOT on II. you become intensely
angry-you are convinced somebody IS
trying TO work of n nature fake on you.
for all real butter has ashes on Il.
Il IL a great city, a very great city.
Nine out Of every ten women you see
are excessively, not TO say painfully
short-waisted. this peculiarly in physl-
que having been acquired by the cor
slant and sudden throwing Of their
hands to their hats in theaters and
ether places Of public torture. When
a woman goes to the theater, she is sit
ting proudly beneath One-fftE Of her
family income and feeling her back
hair as II It had cost her a thousand
dollars when. in the wink Of an eye.
the lights 80 out. a hammer falls. ard
barker yells:
Hats ON
Then comes the sudden approaching
which shOrtens the feminine waist II
the seven haJpins are not out and the
hat down and out IN thirty seconds, an
ems 10 have somebody arrested It IS a
State law that no woman shall keep her
hat on during a performance in the
alter or any public place
Another Of It's Claims.
Another claim 20 fame for Cincinnati
is WIeIerrs, a beer garden with q really
truly orchestra and thirty-two arc lights.
It is one Of those Bohemian places, quite
decent, you know. where the best fam
lies OF Cincinnati 90. and lie about 1t
at breakfast the next morning Il is
there that George b Cox. the irrepres-
sibIe Republican boss Of the city, has
special table. Under his table is the
only cuspidor in the room. which goes
to show that bosses have their hab-
its. Upstairs he has a private room,
where he irV;Gs al his political confer
ences and decides who shall go 70 Con-
gress and who shall stay at home.
The orchestra plays a great variety
OF music. ranging from ragtime 10 Trio
vatore,' but the frequenters Of the gar
den-the garden being walled, rooted.
and hoored-sit in stony, unapplauding