The Washington herald., 1908-01-19
Rules of Conduct for Young Men and Some Good
Advice to Them

I some woman. he makes fulsome and audi
/ bic compliments, causing the blood TO
rush to her face. In fact, he is the most
noXious person one can possibly run
| across, and the wary give him a wide
/ berth. The wonder is that when this
| aWkWardness is so easy 10 cure it should
exist at all, and it would not if those af-
fiicted witi it were not entirely unconscious
that they were suffering from the disease
which comes from intense seif-conscious-
ness.
The cure for this disorder is to become
so interested in something as to lose all
! interest in ones self and to frequent the
society of ones superiors and 20 closely
observe and follow their manners. The
ATbter is conscious Of the fact that the
expression of ones betters" is hard
nut for young America TO swallow. but
/ this remedy has been advised by the
philosophers Of all ages, not only for the
awkward man. but for the dull-witted, the
boorish; and all men really great recog-
nize and admit that he has "betters." 1t
must be borne in mind that il Is wisdom
and experience, not wealth or birth. that
oracle Of good manners. Lord Chester
field, avowed that he always frequented
| the society Of his superiOrs, whom he
reckoned not only by their rank He
writes TO his son; "Dr. Swift and Mr..
| Pope COndescended to admit me TO their
company and though they had no titles
and / was an earl, I always felt that ]
was obliged by their politeness and was
| favored by being allowed to converse with
/ them But by no matter what means
The Arbiter advises all young men cursed
| with aWkWaTdness 10 conquer il AZ no
matter what cost, for TO quote EmeF-
sons friend in Society and Solitude.
| God may forgive sins, but aWkwardness
has no forgiveness in heaven or on earth"
A man is known not only by the COM
| pany he keeps, but by his dress, and it
is common fault with young Americans
to be careless In this matter young
man should so ClOthe himself that his
attire creates no comment either for its
! elegance. its eccentrlcities. or it's shah
biness. His linen should be immaculate.
his shoes properly polished. and his hands
nicely kept. It seems ike carrying Goals
to Newcastle to say this 10 our young
men Of to-day, yet The Arbiter during an
afternoon call the other day net two
young men-very young men they We're
TO be sure. not yet out of their teens
the sons Of gentlemen prominent in So
Ciety, whose shoes looked as though they
had just come from barnyard But 20
be a Miss Nancy as regards his toilet is
fnf hs1 .l... ii.
and careless. Foppishness is detestable
trait in itself, and because it implies the
possession of other traits equally as bad
A young man should be modest in So
cietyi not shrinking or bashful. but he
should seek to adjust himself to the gath
ering in which he happens 10 be and not
attempt TO give il his own tone He
! should never attempt 10 discuss subjects
Of which he is ignorant, and he should
not be afraid TO ask questions, for by
asking questions he both informs himself
and gives pleasure TO those he questions.
II he tells a story It should be apropos
| and brief, and he should endeavor not TO
! laugh too heartily at his own wit It is
not good form TO use current slang, al
! though it must be admitted that some of
the slang that has been coined in the last
few years is so apt that il cannot be re-
placed with any expressions equally fOrce-
ful and fit.
Respect for and Difference to their eld-
ers is a trait as admirable in young men
as it is in young women. and it counts.
too; let those commercially inclined re-
member that No matter what character
a man may bear, let il be said Of him that
Re 4-
sister depends upon him. and it at once
removes any stigma that may rest upon
him. The best social investment a young
man can make is 10 be attentive TO older
women, 10 show them little attentions. to
listen deferenually when they speak. and
10 anticipate their wishes. The social
fortunes of more than one young man
has been made by some doWager who was
/ pleased and f1attered by the attention
shown her. A few minutes passed at the
side of the ChaperOn who sits I'm the
back row at the cOtilIiOn, a few flowers
sent to the mother of the young woman
who holds your fancy on some ami
versary, or a book that you have lust
read and think she might find amusing
is bread cast upon the waters and will
be sure TO return. Men. too, we'll along
in life are pleased and fiattered bv at
| tentions from their juniors. It pleases
/ them to think they are not so old that
they have lost interest for younger peo-
| pie. Julia" said a wise old grandfath-
er to his favOrite granddaughter the
other night, that young Robinson IS a
/ fine fellow" DO you think so. grand
pa?" was the response, Il never thought
him much above the average young man"
Ny dear child. you are no reader of
| character. He is a fine fellow, a keen
fellow, witty fellow I tried some of
my old stories at the club the other night,
and he enjoyed them with a relish such
as l have rarely seen. A fine fellow.
fine fellow, my dear"
All young men who propose going into
society should learn 10 dance. and dance
We'll A young man intellectually inclined
and with the idea Of living the life of a
student may think this q foolish advice.
/ but If one wishes to enter Vanity Fair.
/ If only occasionally. he must do all the
/ foolish things that the denizens of that
! realm affect-a nonconfOrmist is not toll
! Grated IN this close corporation: and if
] he would be a valued member of society,
/ he should make himself as useful In as
many ways as possible. At the club the
other night Smith was under discussion.
and every one agreed that he was a very
mediocre man. But why" asked Brown,
is he invited everywhere? There hasn't
l been smart function in years that Smith
was not on the list He goes everywhere,
and he is actually considered an interest
! ing escort TO dinner. 1 can't understand
/ it 'The reason for his popularity is
very simple" said one OF the group; ''he
/ makes himself SO eteTnally useful. I
never attempt anything myself that