The Montgomery advertiser., 1908-09-13

inserted the word "Catching" and then indorsed 1t. Administration Measure"
 This. told him to show to any of my leaders in the Senate or House and they would put it through and it is unnecessary to say his bill passed. | But Fort. everything has a pathetic | as we'll as humorous side. I saw one
 or the legislators at the public square, when I came down town that evening. and regret to say he was intoxicat-
 ca. Fort. he was drunk. I was feel
 ing specially pleased with myself that
 evening. and with the importance of my high position. for I remember very
 distinctly that as passed from my off, flee out to tho front door of the Capi- toi. saw large nihnber of my I'm perial Guard" standing about the door. cutie blocking the way. With one
 voice. they exclaimed, Make way for 1 his Majesty! Make way for Mighty
 Caesar" and with swinging stride
 and head erect, I passed on. I forgot Fort. to say. wore my usual smile. l Fort--You say you found your friend
 of the Cat Fish BiII' at the Square. l intoxicated?
 Governor--No, No. No, Fort. the
 member whose button had been pulled
 off. He said. Hello Bragg" and you
 could have heard him square. T call you Governor at the Capitol. but as
 we were raised together. you are al-
 ways Bragg to me. If you don't brag 1 on yourself. will" No! No! No!"
 said I. My friend. I do quite enough ] of that for myself" Well, you cer-
 tainly do. but Bragg" said he. When
 came down town. I went round the corner to Luke violincello's and I said. Luke can you give me something to
 revive me quick? He looked at me for a moment and said: "Where you
 bin, you bin seek?' said, No! simply exhausted. Have you anything which | can revive me-" and he said. "Oh, yesi Monshoor. we have the absynthe cock | tall" Well then" said l. give me a 1 quart Bragg. I'll swear I did Luke said, "Ohi Monshoor, Moonshoor,
 quart? Oh! Noi No! No! glass. as we | do in h belle France Well the
 United States is bigger than France.
 them as fast as you can make them" said l, I'll swear I did Bragg-and I think Bragg he did it"
 Fort--"O, that men should put an | enemy in their mouths, to steal away
 their brains,"
 Governor-Put an enemy in their
 mouths? Oh mol Fort. not a whole
 enemy at one time. I have heard of
 the cannibals Fort, who put an enemy
 In their mouths. but I have always understood they take him in broken doses. But Fort, speaking of putting an enemy in their mouths, reminds me of question intended asking you.
 Fort-yes Sire! will to my best endeavor make answer. Governor-Fort, Is it possible, think
 you. for a man to put his foot into his mouth?
 Fort--No Sire
 Fort? Fort-Yes Sire.
 low
 contortionist and could get his foot to | his mouth, he couldn't get it in his mouth. could he?
 Fort-No, Sire.
 Governor-That was what I thought about it too, Fort, and yet some of | these newspapers are everlastingly
 saying, "Everytime the Governor opens his mouth he puts his foot in it."
 don't understand 1t at all. Fort-Oh, Sire, that means in a hgurative sense only. It means that
 in speaking you make mistakes. Governor-Well. did make any mis- take when I said something was as
 thick as the leaves in the Alhambra?
 Fort-oh, yes Sire. The quotation
 you intended to use is. 'aThicf as au-
 tumnal leaves that strow the brooks In Vallombroso."
 Governor-Well, what is the differ ences. Are there no leaves in the | Alhamba?
 Fort-No. my Liege. Governor-Well. will take leave of
 the subject. Confound it, Fort '
 wish you had not given me this pun.
 ming itch. Did I make any mistake in
 my celebrated Samson speech when said, Judge Jones had no right to sit
 In $l0 COW damage case. when the
 railroads were parties?
 Fort-oh, yes. my Liegei The im-
 agination in It's widest flight cannot l picture S10-cow damage suit, AS well might man say q once saw a req bug as big as an elephant" The mlno al once refuses the proposition
 The cow killed may have only been
 worth S5. but as soon as she is killed she becomes Jersey and very val uable. You should by all means. if won
 intended making such a remark at all. have made the amount larger.
 GovernoI-Well, Fort, I viii raise the a%ST4t Eor9Tsa tS SEQ no. ,,.,, , - ''''
 Liege.~~ -'S
 Governor-what Fort do you exuect
 me to sit here all night and do ali the raising? Well. I'll make it $25 and l wont raise 1t another cent. Enter Wallace. Walace-Are you specially engaged | Governor?
 ,Governor-No. John. come in. We arc 1 glad to see you.
 Wailace-Governor, had I been the Generalissimo of the State forces. I
 would much more expeditiously have
 summarized the situation of the Bir-
 mingham strike and brought the re- | ca1cltrant reactionaries to terms.
 ,s Governor-oh. l doubt 1t not John.
 1T you had been up there and fired a | few Volleys of your big words at them am sure they would have scattered that Is, If there were any really l banded together for a breach of the | peace. I am sure don't know. campaigned all about the city in my
 automobile, and I never saw the least | sign of disorder.
 WaIlace-Oh, Governor! Have not the bearing of a soldier? Have I not
 the martial form? Have I not the | pompous stride? Have I not "an eve | like Mars. to threaten and command?" Governor-Yes, yes. yes, you have all | these. John and more. Fort-Mr Liege, 'kie wears the rose | of youth upon him"
 Governor-Oh, yes. and the other
 kind. too. But if did not bring the
 strike to a conclusion sooner than did, 'Is there no balm in Gllead?" Po- 1 litically sueaking of course. | Wallace-Of course, there is. but that 1 is not the question. The main question
 Is. is tn ere any coal in Birmingham?
 W1hy have ySg1 never invited me to
 Governor-Because. my worthy Game
 Commissioner, l wanted you to protect I my birds.
 Fort-Well. I must admit. he is game | anyway.
 protecting d-n the sirdds. dd al 1t ems may a0pSs be safer to shoot a man, you know, in l Alabama, than a quail out of season, | but don't let us get away from the