Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1908-01-14


and the blower on. When he whistled
three times, he said, any intelligent
man would know that there was dam
ger around.
swell, sir, 1 put the Old Missouri
River to bed that night, and he'd fat
tened out to a very small streamlet in
deed, while the locomotive went lame
before supper aud had to be put in
the roundhouse by a couple of pushers.
That's the way with fine ideas. Cold
facts comes and puts crimp in them.
Once I knew a small Teller I could
have stuck in my pocket and forgot
about, but when we went out and took
several prescriptions together on day
he spoke to me like this. Red Says
he, put your little hand in mine, and
We'll go and take n birdseye view Of
the universe AstOnishin' idea, wasn't
it? And him not weighing over hun
dred pound. Howsomever, he didn't
take any birdseye view of the uni
verse. He only become strikingly in
disposed.
"Well, to get back to Boise, you
never in all your life saw so many
men and brothers as was gathered
there that day. and old Aggy, he was
one of the centers Of attraction. That
big voice and black beard was always
where the crowd was thickest and the
wet goods flowing the freest Gentle
men, says he, lets lift up our voices
in melody! That was one of Ag's de-
lusions-he thought he could sing So
four of 'em got on top of a billiard
table and presented Rocked In the
Cradle Of the Deep to the company,
which made me feel glad that hadn't
been brought up that way. After Ag
had hip locked the last low note an
other song bird volunteered.
"This was little fat Dutchman,
with pale blue eyes and a mustache
like two streaks of darning cotton.
He had come TO town to sell pair of
beef steers, but got drawn into the
general hilarity, and now he didn't
care cuss whether he, she or it ever
sold another steer. He got himself on
end and sung :Leeb Fadderlont mox-
true eckstein' in style that made you
wonder that the human nose could
stand the strain.
CAV, cheese thatr says a Teller
near the door Come, get your steers;
one of ems just chased the barber I'D
telegraph pole"
$50 then we all piled out into the
there was the barber sitting on the
crosspiece and the steer paving dirt
underneath.
He done made me come a fast
heat from de cohner.' says the barber
4 KEEP hOllerin' Next" but he amt
pay no 'tention-he make it next fuI
me, shuah! Yah. yah, yah! You gents
orter seen me start at de bottom an
slide all de way up dis yer TELEGRAPH
pole" -.......t
zone of the bull whackers went out
to rope the steers. and Ag gave direc
tons from the sidewalk. He wasn't
very handy with RATA. and that's 6
fact, but the way Ag lit into him was
scandalous. When he'd missed about
six casts of his rope, Ag opened up OF
him: -ss9
"Put a stamp on It and send it +,
him by MALL said Aggy in his sour
castle way. Address it, Bay Steer
middle of Main street, Boise. Ida. Il
not delivered within ten days, return
| to owner. who can use it to hang him
self" Blast my hide IL l couldn'
stand here and throw box car neare
| to the critter! Well, WELL well! How
| many left hands have you got, any
| how? Do 1t up in wad and heaye /
at him for general results. He nigh
get tangled in it.
ut ratified the bull whacker, havin,
so much attention drawn to him, an,
he stepped on the rope and twisted
himself up in it and was flying ligh
generally.
Say says Ag, appealing to tn
crowd, won't some kind friend who
fond of puzzles go down and help tina
gentleman do himself?'
'That made the whacker mad. h
was as red in the face as lobster.
"'You come down and show wha
! yOu can do says he. You've got ga
enough for a balloon ascension, bu
that may be all there is to YOU
| "'Oh, I amt so much says Aggy
although I'm as good a man today 4
ever was in my life, but have III
tie friend here who can rope, dow
| and ride that critter from here to tn
brick front in, five minutes by tn
watch, and If you've got a twenty-fiv
dollar bill in your pocket or its equiv
alent in dust You can observe the Ell
pertinent
I'm go yor, by gosh" says the bu
whacker, slapping his hat on tn
ground and digging for his pile.
Say, if you're referring to m'
Ag,' l says, it's kind of a sudde
spring. l amt what you might call /
training, and that steer is full of tripl
extract of giant powder
"'G'wan! says AZ. You can do it
and then we're twenty-five AHEAD
But suppose we lose?
Well 1t won't be such an awft
loss
Now. you look here, Agamemno
q. Jones' says l.. L amt going
stand for pnttinglu up summer bree7
agin that feller's good dough. That
IL.