davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Chance for Fire Engines.

A dignified negro divine. pastor OF
a popular church at Washington
visited his old home in Dooly ounty
Georgia. recently and was invited tc
preach on Sunday at the local church.
After such a sermon as only a negro
can preach. he called on one of the old
deacons who had known him in child.
hood. TO lead the prayer, and the lat
ter closed his petition as follows:
20. Lawd. glib dis pore brodder dc
eve oh de eagle. dat he spy out de sin
afar OF. Glue his han to de GOSPEL
pillow. Tie his tongue TO de plowline
Of trufe, an nail his we're to de wiless
telefoam pole oh salvation. Bow his
head way down in de narrer. dark
valley. where much prayer is wanted;
den. o Lawd. 'noint him wifi de kere.
some lie OF sanctifeation and sot him
on iah'"-St. Louis Globe Democrat.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Three Views Of the UNEMPLOYED.

All the world over. the voorhees,
workman is tasting of the bitterness
OF hope deferred OF OF despair only too
well justified. New York. Paris, Ber-
lin. London. are full OF the cry of the
workless.-Freeman's Journal. Dublin.
There is no doubt that the thriftless
habits Of the working classes in Eng
land-Scotland is much better in this
respect-are greatly to blame for the
extreme restitution that prevails. As
a rule. the English workingman in.
creases his expenditure with every in
crease made in his wages.-Town and
Country.
State employment brings us no near
er a solution Of the unemployed prob
lem. The bootmaker wants bread and
the baker vans boots, and some unex.
planned defect in the industrial ma
chine keeps them apart. The socialist
remedy is to set them both to plant
rees upon a w%indswept moor. and to
plumber the butcher and bricklayer to
provide for the cost of the experiment.
Spectator.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
A Timely Air.

During one of the political tours of
Mr.. Cleveland. in which he was accom-
panied by Secretary olney. he arrived
during a severe storm at a town In
which he was to speak. As he entered
the carriage with his friends and was
driven from the station the rain
changed to hail, and immense stones
battered and ratified against the We
hicle. A brass band, rather democrat
lied by the storm, stuck bravely to its
post and played.
That is the most realistic music I
have v er heard" remarked the presi-
dent.
What are they playing?" asked the
secretary of state.
Hail to the Chief-with real
hall" rejoined Mr.. Cleveland.-Har.
per's Weekly.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Waterproofnc Matches

Perhaps some of your readers would
be interested to know that | have
found a simple. inexpensive way to
waterproof matches. writes a CORE
spondent to the Scientific American.
Into some melted parafin tcare be.
ing taken that it was as cool as pos
siblel dipped a few ordinary parlor
matches. After Withdrawing them
and allowing them TO cool 1t was
found that they scratched almost as
easily as before being coated with the
wax. Several We're held under water
for six or seven hours and all of them
lighted as easily as before immersion.
When the match is scratched the par.
aifine is first rubbed off and the match
lights in the usual way.
Matches treated as above would be
very useful on camping or canoeing
trips. as they do not absorb moisture.
Since more rubbing is required TO
light them than the ordinary match.
1t would be practically impossible TO
set them on fire by accidental drop.
ping.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Az Vale Sees II.

Tanke-It must be great to be q
Harvard man.
Styne-Why so?
The streets up there are so crooked
that people can't tell whether you're
walking straight or not."-Yale Rec
ord,
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
NO SKIN LEFT ON BODY.
For Six Months Baby Was Expected
to Die with Eexema-Now Well
Doctor Said to Use Cuticura.

six months after birth my little girl
broke out with eczema and | had two
doctors in attendance. There was not
n particle of skin left on her body, the
blood oozed out just anywhere. and We
had to wrap her in silk and carry her
on a pillow for ten weeks. She was the
most terrible sight I ever saw, and for
six months ! looked for her to die. /
used every known remedy to allevi.
ate her suffering. for 1t was terrible
to witness. DR.. c. gave her up. DIR.
B recommended the Cuticura
Remedies. She will soon be three
years old and has never had a sign
of the dread trouble since. We used
about eight cakes OF Cuticura Soap
and three boxes OF Cuticura Ointment.
James J. Smith. Durmid, Va, Oct. Il
and %. 1906"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
LIES OF STATESMEN
PRINCE BISMARCK WAS AN &C
kNoWLEpoED MASTER.
His mendscity Described as Bold,
Simple and Unstudied-Faise-
hoods Of Other Great Rulers
Of Nations.

Prince Bismarck, once definitely
and irrevocably retired from power.
had no delicacy In describing himself
as an uncompromising liar. says the
New York Sun. The quality OF his
mendacity was not strained; II was
bold. simple and unstudied. Old
Emperor William was his apt and
proficient pupil. Between them. by
straightforward lying that would have
Disguised Machiavelli. they made his.
tory. The lie OF Ems was a prodigious
thing. unmade m empire. created a
greater and deluged a continent in
blood.
There was no common knowledge OF
Prince Bismarck's achievements I'm the
art OF lying at the time of his activ.
ity. They were well enough known
In high places. but to make public such
"A charge against so great a man VAS
to Incur great personal Inconvenience.
or expose ones self to ridicule. Sim.
pie veracity is resorted to by very
great statesmen only when they are
reasonably sure that they run no
danger Of being believed. bismarck
was n of the great figures of the
nineteenth century. In all his career
he never told a trivial lie. while for
gratuitous lying he entertained an
inefable contempt.
In the early part Of the last cen
fury nobody thought OF calling Ma.
poleon Bonaparte a liar. II seemed
too inadequate. None Of his syco-
plants is on record as describing him
as a gentleman. His precious nephew
gained his 20 years Of ~precarlous
ascendancy by an effective counterfeit
OF all his uncle's worst qualities plus
his own undiluted depravity.
Disraeli. the most distinguished Jew
In modern history. was much the In.
tellectual superior Of bismarck. The
imputation of lying was never success
fully urged against him. even by the
house Of commons. On the other
hand. implicit belief in anything that
he uttered VAS held to be the height
OF temerity. II was maintained OF
PalmerstOn that he never told a lie
outside Of the house of commons in
whole life.
The statement of an obvious un.
truth does not necessarily impair a
mans character for ~veracity. Mr..
Gladstone had a wonderful reputation
for tr%uthfulness. and maintained II
to his death. in the estimation of
perhaps a majority Of Englishmen. It
Is only just to his character to ac-
that with advancing years
he himself shared the same convic-
ton.
Respecting those persons who infest
the public prints with lamentations re.
speeding the prevalent decay Of the
art Of lying. VIC hold their burden to
be mainly afectation. There is none
OF all the arts of the day it is
most robust.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
MIR. LacsIina's Mean Joke.

"You have named the baby Tetan-
u.s." exclaimed the Mortified caller.
Yes" answered Mrs. Lapsling. Il
think that's what we'll call her. It's
the name my husband suggests"
but think how it will mortify her
when she grows to be a young woman,
Do you know what 'tetanus' means, II
Ear lockjaw."
You must be mistaken about that.
He says it means silent. quiet, re.
served"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
CURE FOR HYSTERIl.
RED-HoT IRON APPLIED TO
FLESH IS MOST EFFECTIVE.
II Is the Opinion Of Physicians Tha,
Too Much sympathy Is Usually
Given to the Victims Of
Nerves.

A red-hot iron applied to he flesh
is a vigorous but none the less erec.
tive cur for hysteria. The physicians
have concluded that toe much sym.
pathy is usually given in cases of
hysteria. and that a realistic shock
sometimes accomplishes more than
medicine. In fact, one expert at the
recent meeting of the American Asso-
citation of Obstetricians and Gynecolo-
gists asserted that physicians practice
more Christian Science than do the
Christian Scientists. The principal
paper was read by DIR. A. Morgan
Vance OF Louisville on the subject:
"Hysteria as a Surgeon Sees IT,"
Some Of DIR. vance's ideas follow.
"A physician asked me to go to a
place 100 miles from Louisville to see
his sister. who was bedridden and had
worn out her family and other reia.
tives being waited on. | refused to go
and said she would have to be brought
to me. Some time later the physician
asked me TO go TO a hospital In Louis
Vile to see his sister. She declared
she was going to die and that she
couldn't turn over when | told her to.
The devil you can't | said roughly.
and grabbed her by the hips and threw
her over. I had her taken away from
a lot of sympathizing old women. and
in a short time she was walking
around.
Il was called to treat a young wom-
an whose leg had drawn up. Her
mother gave her trashy French novels
and wrote her i0-page letters; besides,
she was surfeited with sympathy from
mothers. The leg vas put In q plaster
cast for effect. and when I was cutting
1t out later she said: I know my leg
Ia going to draw up know IT, Just
as | was about TO remove the cast I
sprang at her and shaking my fist in
her face I growled: If that leg draws
up I'll break your d little neck!'
She was a refined and cultured girl.
and the shock cured her Immediately"
DIR. John A. Lyons of Chicago told
an amusing story of how he furnished
an infant TO a h~ysterical woman. who
imagined she was about to become a
mother. The woman's friends and rel.
atives had been busy making baby
clothes for months. and when the
woman learned from the doctor that
she had a case of imagination she
went on 10 that the doctor had to get
a baby to wear the clothes that had
been made. He got one at a hospital
and the neighbors don't know any
better. he said.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Vienna a GROWING CITY.

According to a report from the Uni
ted States consul at Vienna. the
census of that city, taken in 1900.
shows a population Of t.635.647. or
nearly $4,000 less than that of Chi.
cago. These figures show Vienna TO
rank next after London. Paris and
Berlin among the European capitals.
while in this country only New York
and Chicago are larger. In the last
ten years Vienna has increased 2ls
per cent. or slightly faster than the
average for the whole United States
or the two American cities larger than
Vienna. New York increased in ten
years 37.S per cent. and Chicago 54.4
per cent.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
A MATTER OF HEREoITY.
Agnes Had Only Followed In the Foot
steps Of Her Mother.

Even II there had not been kernels
Of rice on her hat and n glad light
Of love in her eye any bachelor could
have told that she was a bride. And
the manne in which she spoke to her
husband showed they had not been
married long.
A mar in the passing crowd spied
the couple, and rushed over TO greet
the bride.
We'll. well. Agnes" he cried. ex.
tending his hand. you don't mean TO
say that you're married."
"Why-why. yes the girl Siam.
mered. vivid color mounting to her
checks. as she tried to defend her
novel situation. 'You-you know. II
runs in the family. Mother was mar.
ried, too"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
An Intelligent Child.

A small boy was playing with the
scissors. and his kindly old grand
mother chided him.
You mustn't play with the scissors
dear. I know a little boy like you who
was playing with a pair of scissors
just like that pair, and he put them in
his eye and put his v out. and he
could never e anything after that"
The child listened patiently. and
said. when she got through the mar.
rative:
What vas the matter with his
other eye?"-Bystander.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Mr.. William +. Vahlberg, Oklahoma
City. Okla. writes:
"One bottle of Peruna which | have
taken did more toward relieving me of
an aggravated case of cafarrh of the
stomach, than years Of treatment with
the best physicians.
Il had given up hopes Of relief. and
only tried Peruna as "A last resort.
II shall continue using il. AS | feel
satisfied IL will effect an entire and
permanent cure.
Il most cheerfully recommend Peruna
to all who may read this"
Peruna is usually taken as n last re-
sort. Doctors have been tried and
failed. Other remedies have been used.
Sanitariums have been visited. Travel
has been rcsorted to.
At last Peruna is tried. Relief is
found.
This history is repeated over and
over again. every day in the year. II is
such results as this that gives Peruna
its unassailable hold upon the people.
We could say nothing that would ado
force to such testimonials rs the above.
That people who have had catarrh and
have tried every other remedy avail
able. find relief in Pcruna, constitutes
the best argument that could be made.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

A certain congressman is the father
of a bright lad Of ten. who persists. de-
spite the parental objection and de-
cree, in reading literature of the half
dime variety.
That's a nice way to be spending
your time" said the father on one oc-
easion. What's your ambition, any
how"
Dad responded the youngster.
with a smile. I'D like to have people
tremble like aspen leaves at the mere
mention Of my name."-Lippincottis.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
No, Always VIVA, They Seem.

Prof. and Mrs. Hadley were on a
train bound for New York. where
Yale's president was to speak before
a national convention. He made use
OF the hour and 30 minutes he spent
In the train by rehearsing his speech
in a low voice. using his hands to en-
phasize certain passages.
A kindly matron who was sitting d.
rectly behind Mr.. and Mrs. Hadley.
and who had been watching and lis
tening. leaned forward and. tapping
Mrs. Hadley on the shoulder. said. feel.
ingly: You have my sincere sym
pathy. my poo- woman; l have one
Just like him at home."-Success.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Little Henry had been very naughty
and was shut up in a closet until he
should express proper penitence for
his misdeeds. Near by sat his moth
er. ready to extend pardon to the
small offender at the first sign Of
sorrow. At last a faint sigh caught
her ear. Creeping silently TO the
door. she discovered the child seated
on the floor in a disconsolate attitude.
Poor met" he muttered. with an
other sigh. Why can't | get out?
Use done sorried all | can sorry!"-
Delineator.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
One Of the Three.

We'll. there We're only three boys
Ia school today who could answer one
question that the teacher asked u.s.,
said a proud boy Of eight.
And | hope my boy was one OF the
three said the proud mother.
You bet ! was answered Young
Hopeful. "and Sam Harris and Harry
Stone were the other two
i am very glad you proved yourself
so good a scholar. my son; it makes
your mother proud OF you. What aues.
ton did the teacher ask. Johnnie?"
Who broke the glass in the back
window"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
TO CURE A COUGH


Mix two ounces Of G~lycerine and a
half ounce of Virgin Oil OF Pine COM
pound pure with a half pint OF Straight
Whisky. Shake well and take a tea
spoonful every four hours.
The genuine Virgin Oil Of Pine COM
pound pure is prepared only by The
Leach Chemical Co., Cincinnati, Ohio.
and is put up only in half-ounce walls,
each vial securely sealed in a round
wooden case to insure its freshness
and purity.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
No Watered Stock.

The "get-rich-quick" stock broker
was worried.
Il fear 1t is only a matter OF time
when they will run me off the earth
he sighed.
But cheer up" FASTENED the bosom
friend. IF they run you on the earth
why not open up an Office on Mars?"
The bubble broker shook his head.
What would be the user" he
sighed.
There is no water on Mars"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

said. ut wasn't money he wanted.
but somebody to scratch his back"
There are many with strong arms and
willing hands that have that same
y~earning. Hunts Cure will make back
scratching. or any other old scratch
ing. totally unnecessary. It knocks
out any itching sensation that ever
happened. and 1t does 1t right now.
One application relieves.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

OF Doan's Kidney Pills and began u.s.
ing them. One box made me stronger
and freer from pain. I kept on using
them and in three months was able to
get out on clutches. and the kidneys
we're acting better. / improved rap
idly. discarded the crutches and to
the wonder Of my friends was soon
completely cured"
Sold by all dealers. 30 cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co. Buffalo. N. Y.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
There and Back.

Once upon another time a tramp
was being fed at a college cookery on
the pieces de ~resistances OF the fresh
man class.
Some authorities claim that bad
cooking drives many men to drink"
said the assistant principal: was that
the case with you?"
Looks to me. lady. like de odder
way around" answered the hobo, un-
gratefully; 1T wuz drink druv me to
this!"-Illustrated Sunday Magazine.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Spoil. for Fashion. Follower.

At auctions in London during the
last half of 1907 there were catalogued
for sale 1912 skins of birds OF para
disc, nearly lis. 900 white heron
plumes and a vast number OF the
skins and plumes Of many other birds
OF beautiful plumage. including alba
tross quilts and the tails OF the Tyre
bird.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Caused by constant shifting OF the
gaze. as by moving picture shows. trav-
cling in rapidly moving
and the like may be greatly relieved by
external application 10 the eyes OF DR..
~AiitchelIs Eye Salve. II strengthens
me eyes and takes away that burning
sensation. Automobilists use Mitchell's
Eye Salye. For sale everywhere. Csc.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

In nine months Of the current yesr
10000 aliens came to this country
and $4,000 f%oreign-born people went
back to Europe. During the similar
period Of last year there arrived in
America 1,135,O00 aliens. while those
who departed from these shores num-
bered only 100000.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Simmons Liver Purifier is the most
valuable remedy l ever tried for Con-
stipation and Disordered Liver. II
does its work thoroughly. but does not
grippe like most remedies OF It's charac-
ter. certainly recommend it when
ever the opportunity occurs.
w. NJ. ToMLINSON,
Price 25c. Oswego. Kansas
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Money Expended on Schools.

Last year New York city spent S33.-
100000 on its public schools: Chicago,
$4,000. 900; Boston more than 31O.-
100000; Philadelphia a little more
Than ss,OOO.00o Though Philadelphia
is the third city in population in the
United States, it stood thirty-fourth in
per capita expenditure on schools.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

We wish to state in as plain and
vigorous way as words can express it.
that Hunts Cure will positively. quick.
ly and permanently cure any form of
Itching Skin disease known. One box
is guaranteed to cure. One application
affords relief.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
The Pursuit of Literature

What do they do at the Chaucer
club?"
"oh. the members talk about n
another"
And what II all the members are
present."
Then they have to talk about chau
GER"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Unfortunate AuusIon

Uncle" said the ~impecunicus neph.
ew, you ought to go and see the new
play. You would just die of laugh.
Ing" The old man merely glared. A
few minutes later there could be head
the sound of a scratching pen as h,
altered his will-Stray Stories.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
An Important pistinctIon.

e" have discovered" remarked the
gossip. that Mr.. Bliggins owes every.
body"
Indeed" replied Miss Cayenne
Does he borrow small sums or
enough to entitle him to respect as o
Observation-Disclosures.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
~QuaHfy-Make Good

Germs Of Malaria will effectively tie your
hands behind your back. Your power to
do things is cut in half by Malaria. Ouinine
only makes the trouble worse by reducing
the nerve force. Johnson's Tonic is the
qualify-make good,
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

self-love is a principle OF action;
but among no class Of human beings
has nature SO profusely distributed
this principle Of life and action as
through the whole sensitive family of
genius.-Isaac Disraeli.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Oegenerates.

Alcohol by overstimulation and Onium
by discrimination lead to Degeneraey.
But Malaria i both the father and mother
OF hait 81 the degenera.es and blazes the
way for the rest Of them. .Jobnson's
Tonic Is the only medicine which will drive
out every trace and taint of Malarial poison.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
Not a Free Lunch.

Il say. waiter" queried the seedy
restaurant patron. what can you give
me for breakfast"
4 can't give you anything" replied
the man behiLd the white apron, but
you can have steak and eggs for a
quarter"
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
STATE or ONO crrr ov roLEDo.

LUCAS COUNTY.
FRANK J. CHENEY makes oath that he b wnhs
partner Of the nrm OF D. J. CHENEr 4 Co. doing
business m the city Of Toledo. County and state
Aforesaid. and that said nrm will pay the sum Of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every
case OF CAr,RRH that cannot Be cured by the use Of
Halls CAr,KRH CURE.
J. CHENEY.
sworn 70 before me and subscribed IN my presence,
this eth day Of December. A. D.. 1855.
-, A ". GLEASON.
49, NOTARY PUBLIC.
Hairs Catarrh Cure l. taken Internally and acts
directly upon the blood and mucous surf-ees Of the
system. send for TESTIMONIALS. free.
FL. CHENEY a CO.. Toledo o
Sold by all Druggists. T5e.
1Ake Halls Family Pulls for constipation
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
lFaithfuiness.

Remember the test of faith is faith
fulness. Have we in us the stun
that will not weary or falter, that
will make US stand a sleepless senti.
mel at the post till relief comes.-Hugb
Black
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Hunts Lightning Oil is up and do
ing all the time. 1t cures your aches,
pains, cuts. burns and bruises while
you sleep. Rub a little on your mis-.
cry and feel 1t disappear.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

Tho st. Anthony chapel car which
recently finished a long tour through
Wisconsin and Minnesota, has had q
prosperous week in Philadelphia
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26
A Cheerful Guesser.

What does an actor mean by a fat
part?'"
Il don't know. but from the oleagin.
GUS SOUND | should judge it means the
olio. kansas City Times.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

It vas at Derby. England. that the
members OF the Society OF Friends
were first called Quakers. and the
church there has Just observed its cen
~tenniaI.
Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1908-11-26

DO you think that the people ought
to ruler" asked the patriot.
Don't ask me-" answered the nerv-
Gus man. I'm prejudiced against the
idea I'm a baseball umpire"