davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
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Looie Linkenfusser, Verefferheissat:
Greetings, Looie: 1 am wrotening
you in der-ge-hopes dot you vondt
gedt id, pecaus you are on your way
hiddervards to attention der Stats
Fair. Ut you are nod ad home, und
dondt get dis, bleas led me know, and
viii wroten you again py telespatch,
pecaus. on der Lefel Looie, you
shouldn't Offer look dis Stats Fair,
vich iss greadt diddings. Uf course
you hat seen Stats Fairs, but nodings
like vot We ISIS going to hat negst
weeks. Our Stats Fair will be q
cucoo. NIT all der fedders on i'd. Nod
only Will der bosses chase each oder
around der ring seferal times. but
dere will be seferal oder stunts vich
you would unchoy. Real sook-cows
und heavyweight pigses will be on
hand. You hat pesser come und meet
der pigses, und hold a family reonion.
Dot ISIS all tink aboudt chusd now.
so will shut up. Hoping dis will find
you und your SELDOM der same. I re-
mainder as effer, HANS.
On Seggond fought, B. S.: hat a
liddle lecture in my sysdem vich
tink i'd right to transmission to you,
knowing dot you ISIS a proon und in
need of all kinds uf good atwice. Id iss
dis. Looie; ven you want to do thirty
trick, be sure und fix i'd so you voundt
gedt caught ad id. Id ISIS painful to
gedt caught NIT der goods. pecaus
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

MIN, OF the pretty poise of her head.
OF the fine lines of her strong young
ngure, and the softness OF her voice.
II wish I might call at the-the
nome here" said Crosby as he left her
at the gate.
II you would" she replied.
crosby went homeward with his
mead In the clouds. In the back yard
he encountered his most, gloomify
whiting a stick by the chopping
Say" he callede as Crosby camenn.
me an Marthy's been talkin' it over
about your leavin'. you know We
come to the conclusion that maybe it's
them fresh-air younguns that bothers
you. IT that's it, I'll see they don't
come nigher'n the fence"
Don't do anything of the sort" said
Crosby with finality. Annoy me?
Not at all. Indeed, I find them in
teresting-most interesting And. by
the way, Mr.. Dean, I'm not going. /
shall stay all summers long as the
tresn air youngsters stay. in fact
1t was early in September that the
eminent physician sat in his big, dim
ONCE smiling over a letter he was
reading
THE neurosis Americana has COM
pletely disappeared" one portion of it
ran; but 1t was not quiet that did
cure to noise and excitement"
The eminent physician frowned
Il am sailing the oath" the letter
went on, ION the Colonia on a little
trip to Sorrento and Sicily. In strict
est confidence I will add that the trip
is of the wedding Variety
'Ah!'' said the physician with a
soft chuckle of comprehension
8copyrighted. 1908, by Associated
Literary Press.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
GLOBE SIGHTS.
IFrom the Atchison Globe.1

IFrom the Atchison Globe.1
It is the man who becomes discour-
aged who gets left.
We've noticed that being tickled to
death never kills anyone.
1t is not good for a man to be alone.
But it is often better for woman.
A sissy boy is one who takes towels
with him when he goes swimming.
Some peoples idea of being relig-
ious is to eat cold dinner on Sunday.
Every man who has tasted JOY, will
finally admit that it has a bitter taste.
Pretty people are seldom compli-
mented behind their backs: They are
picked on.
Being agreeable means agreeing
with people, no matter what your own
opinions may be.
The older a man gets. the more he
realizes 1t doesn't pay to go about with
chip on his shoulder.
1t makes every man insulted that in
his own case, his word is not enough
to prove his innocence.
What has become of that old wo-
mans compliment for a young girl:
'She's real lady-hke?"
There are times in a mans life wher
nothing will satisfy him but a look al
the elephant or tiger.
The great amount of suffering ir
the world may be traced to too much
love; never to a lack of 1t.
The trouble with so many people
| is that they have their thoughts in one
world, and their work in another.
The trouble with misplaced conf
dence is that usually money or Other
valuables have been placed with the
confidence.
! The only thing in the world tina
collects no sentiment is a dollar, an6
it collects interest, which some peoplt
| think is better.
| Usually when a man quarrels will
one relative. he does worse: he quar-
rels with other relatives because they
won't take Sides"
| When a woman catches hold of hel
| 1O-year-oId boy to kiss him, it is ver1
| often to see if she can detect any odol
of tobacco about him.
/ Perhaps one reason so few girl
realize their ambition to become grea
is that they have to stop 50 often t.
powder their nose.
Old people pay themselves com
p1iment by saying that the young folk
are not so well-behaved and polit'
as they were in their day.
How" every married woman say
in fine contempt of Spins woes, "cal
she have trouble when she has he
own money, and doesn't have to asl
anyone for a cent?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

somewhat of protection it will not 90
to infer therefrom that the British
government is about to abandon the
policy of free trade. The contrary is
the fact.
Notwithstanding the noise made by
the advocates of the mild brand OF pro-
lection bearing the Chamberlain iaDel
it is safe to say that it will be many
years before Great Britain aoandons
free trade. He would be rash pro-
phet who would prophesy that she VIII
ever do so. In the meantime. however
it will be interesting to note the erect
of the new British patent act.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

IFron1 the New York Press.1
Honest men are almost as scarce as
silent women.
A man without enemies is apt to be
shy of friends.
Be sure you are right, then go ahead
and ask your wife.
Few people make a success OF being
good on the installment plan.
You can always tell sensible man
by the way he always agrees with you
One-half the world is only waiting
for a chance to do the other half.
Most people shuttle off this mortal
coil before they reach the age OF dis
erection.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

It's TO be hoped that Henderson Mar
kin, chairman OF the Democratic state
committee and Joe Dolley, chairman of
the Republican state committee. will
stick to their announced intentions
which they delivered to each other re-
Gently of conducting their respective
campaigns along clean lines. Dirty
politics has long since had its day,
There is no need for it now nor was
there a necessity for It at any time
NO votes were ever made by INDUCING
ap acrimonious personalities. That po-
litical leaders now realize that fact Is
one of the good signs Of the times.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
PROVED A QUESTION.

"A writer IN Nn6 WlCuAld GdS1o NC"
scribes the recent meeting OF the party
council at Topeka as a new method of
politics, intimaking that the old ways
and the machine" ways were not
utilized by the gentlemen who head
the party organization. The Wichita
Beacon takes the other view of the
case and says 1t was simply the ordi-
nary way in which the majority runs
over the minority.
The Beacon is correct. Mr.. Stubs
ran the party council according to the
strictest of machine methods. The
only work of the council was the
adoption of the platform and when it
was proposed that the members of
the resolution committee be selected
by the members of the council them
selves, Mr.. Stubs promptly and frank
ly opposed the motion because, as he
said, the council might do as 1T pleased
and not as he and others in command
wanted it to do. Mr.. Bristow came in
with me too" to Mr.. Stubs and
said the proposition was new one
and that the committee should be
selected as it always had been, by the
chairman with the advice of few
leaders. Mr. Cyrus Leland supported
ment that he believed in machine poll
tics and therefore was for rc----- the
new machine have its way.
There was nothing wrong about
LneSe proceedings. MI SluDDS IeIt the
responsibility and did not propose any
one should interfere with his plans.
But it simply proved to the members
of the council and to the state that the
''anti-machine" talk of Mr.. Stubbs was
merely an issue to get into power on
and when he got the power he used IL
just as all the machine politicians
have done from the beginning. There
really was less excuse for arbitrary
action than usual, but Mr.. Stubs was
afraid to let the council select it's own
committeeman and he did not permit
it, We don't blame him a bit a@d in
deed at the time were glad he did 1t,
as it proved a few things which up TO
that time might have been questions
of doubt.-Hutchinson News.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Walter Wellman in series of arti-
icles from New York in the Chicago
Record-Herald is telling how Mr. Taft
IS gaining strength in the east by his
plain, honest discussion of business
topics. and says the people are dis
covering that the Republican nominee
is his own man and is not overshadow-
ed by Roosevelt. Mr.. Wellman has
also written from New York of the
great strength that Mr.. Bryan is de-
veloping in the west.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
JOURNAL ENTRIES

Many a limp is a good sign of COL
lege training.
Truth is mighty in more ways than
one. It's mighty scarce.
\ =
Maybe some collegians are called
hard students because their muscles
are like iron,
Jokes on the vice presidency are
getting into the class of mother-in-law
Witticisms.
4 y X
The person who enjoys telling dis
agreeable things would make an ideal
weather prophet.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
rFrnrn tha Chicago News.I

From the chicago NeWs.i
Many a man who thinks he Is right
doesn't go ahead.
The more money you have the more
you can get with 1t.
It's easier to talk philosophy than 1t
Is to live up to II.
Every man owes himself a living,
and it's up to him to get busy.
Only a fool would waste any time
trying to argue with a man who is in
love.
Ever notice how easy it is for a
chronic kicker to find something TO
whine about?
Most men must be proud of their
foolishness, JUDGING by the way they
don't try to keep it under cover.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

points are between the first and third
teams in the American Association. In
the American League there are only &c
points between the first and third
teams while in the Western Association
Topeka has the commanding lead of 81
points over it's nearest rival Great is
Cooley and his colleagues.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Hats off some more to John D. Rookie
teller. In addition to being one of the
wealthiest men in the world, the family
of which he is a member is of noble
lineage. How careless of Miss Tarbell
to overlook this important fact in her
entertaining history Of the gentleman.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Returning prosperity and increased
business Is forcing the railroads all
over the country to relax in their iron
clad retrenchment policies which the
hard times forced upon them. And
probably the railroads are quite as de-
lighted to do this as their employees
out of work and the people generally
are to have them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Candidates for office in this state, re-
gardless Of which ever party they be-
long to, report that they are being re-
ceived, on their speechmaking tours,
with wonderful enthusiasm. They
shouldn't become too highly elated over
these manifestations of the public. A
Kansas crowd can wax enthusiastic
over anything for the time being And
it's not enthusiasm that counts very
much. It's votes.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
AS TT HAPPENED

Maud Muller on summers day
pretended to be making hay,
A local judge came riding by.
She thought he was a fat old guy.
The judge his neither lip did curl:
considered Maud lazy girl,
he gave his nag a sounding Sian
And bade that animal ''Giddap!''
Prosaic was the episode,
MS nonor vanished down the road.
He didn't want Maud for his wife
HOW unromantic is this life!
st. Louis Republic.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

James ]. Hill. the railroad magnate,
evidently thinks that there's room in
the United States for the development
of few more empires" He says that
there ought to be $4,000 miles of railway
built in this country in the next five
years. Maybe there ought to be but it
Is pretty safe to say that there will not.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

The railroads in these parts are ar
ranging to run special trains to To-
peka next week for the great state
wide fair to be held here. They'll need
to for the people in the country round
about are enthusiastic over the OPP
portunity to attend a real fair of fine
proportions and will flock hitherward
in great numbers
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

1t seems that with the fortune at her
command Mrs. Marshall Field, Jr
might have hooked an Englishman
with title only one step removed from
that Of king. But strange to relate she
selected a plain Mr.. This is something
of departure in the way of interna-
tional matches where a wealthy Amer
lean girl is one of the contracting par
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Among the baseball leagues there is
only one in which the leading team is
making a runaway race for the PEN
hant. That's the Western Association
and Topeka's ball tossers are the ones
who are doing the trick. In the Ma
Honal League only IL points separate
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

From the condition of the campaign
funds of the two prominent parties it
does not seem likely that either one of
them win be able this year to afford
the services Of Bourke Cochran, the
famous New York congressman who is
Democratic in tendencies but whose
oratorical abilities go to the highest
bidder in campaign times. 1t was cur
Eent1y reported that Mr.. Cochran re-
ceivsd 100000 from the late Mark
Hanna. for his services in the first Nc
Kinley campaign. Cochran supported
Bryan In the next contest and it was
said that he got a fancy figure for his
efforts.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

For the administration of justice
Kansas City, Mo-. does not seem to need
any other agent than Judge Wallace
who has achieved a certain notoriety
by his crusade against the operation OF
theaters on Sunday. He declares that
If a grand Jury, soon to be empanelled
does not bring in indictments against
persons charged with violating the Law
against selling goods and working on
Sundays he will discharge it. That's
rather taking the law into his own
hands isn't it? But then they are
won't to do strange things in Missouri
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
FRON OTHER PENS
A SOLDIERS OBLIGATIONS.

The United States has never lacked
for men in the military service in time
of war. On the contrary, there are
more men anxious to enlist whenever
there is prospect of action than there
are vacancies in the service. But the
enlisted man must bear in mind that
his obligations under his oath of en-
listment are as great in times of peace
as when there is war. The fact that
his punishment for violation of those
obligations is not so grave is no argu-
ment that would justify desertion in
time of peace more than it would
when the country had need of her SOL
diers on the battlefield.
A soldier is a soldier whether it be
in camp, in front of the enemy or in
barracks with no whisper of an enemy
anywhere on earth. His obligations
under his oath as soldier and as a
patriotic citizen are exactly the same
in both instances, and he Is just as
much a coward if he stealthily quits
the service in time Of peace as if he
deserts before the enemy. Only the
one is moral cowardice and the other
is physical cowardice. San Antonio
Express.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
A SATURDAY SERMON.

Cast not away therefore your confidence.
which hath great recompense of reward.
Hebrews X :35.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

might es veil safe der egspences, fer
id ISIS a umpossibility. Uf dere vas
no oder way to gedt ouf NIT her face
to der backwards. a womans would
chump ofer der tail end.
Trickett ISIS angry, und declares he
will unforce der probationary law,
but dot iss nod vot he is angry
aboudt.
Warming to Struggled grand-chury:
Stobp vile dere iss yedt time; keebp
on und you are Haple to proof dot
der vomans had only a bad dream.
Uf Gotch, der wrassler. looks any
ting like his pictoor, candt von-
der dot he ISIS der champeen. Won
square look ad dot mug would trow
me down swell times und knock me
oudt ouf a window.
Dot nois you heard today--dot vas
der Tennis Racquet.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Wichita claimss id iss almost oop
NIT Topeka in population, und warns
US to look oudt or We will gedt
heated. However. uf dey had a hum
dret tousandt, Id would sdill be
Wichita.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Misder Bryan vas rendered a mess
uf fried praries cbickenss ad Fargo,
Soutdakota. Dere is advantages efen
in being Democrats candidate.
Prairies chickens iss scarce.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

some Won ISIS liable to kick you on der
knock. We hat here iii our midst a
SAMPLE uf der raw work vich men
shorter und-uglier' under noder
Teller, und blows him cuff uf der map
temporarily. But in der meantime,
Looie, der friends uf der Teller vich
was blowed oop, hat formed COM
mittee uf sefen tousandt. und ISIS pre-
pairing der Glad Axe fer der bumb-
tosser. Pressendtly he will gedt i'd in
der neck. Hoping dis-but 1 said
dot vonce, HANS.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

Id iss my guess dot der gail vich
ISIS Engaged to Liddle Billy Bryan. iss
holding her ungagemendt in escrow.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05

In Chawcago dey ISIS trying to un-
went a sysdem to make vimmips gedt
ouf a strasse-car proberly, but dey
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
KANSAS COMMENT
ITys II1sr KANSAS.

Mr.. F. D. Coburn's latest piece of
literature on the Kansas crop situation
for 1908 though Astounding in figures as
1t does. is the other end climax to the
strictly Characteristic story or Kansas
Mr.. Coburn discovers that there is
more wheat this year than there was
last and that the corn crop VIII De
equally as good If 1t is not better, than
1t was in 1907.
Though dealing with the matter in
rather cold and formal way, by the
medium of figures, dollar signs and the
tables of weights and measures, Mr.
Coburn has nevertheless written
work that amounts to classic, when
1t is hitched to the first half OF the
story, told in the beginning OF the year.
Lamentations turned to rejoicings;
total failures yielding forty bushels TO
the acre-Kansas has simply written
down again the assurance that she is
still her old self, possessed of all the
whims and eccentricities that make
life within her borders one long
"holler" Of alternating grief and JOY
served up in such exquisite balance as
to give the joy unusual emphasis.
1t is gratifying to learn from Mr..
Coburn that the wheat yield for Kan
sas this year is to be 10 million bushels.
when the threshers have finished their
work, and that the corn crop VIII a.
least be up to that of 1907. But more
than all else 1T is gratifying 10 know
that nothing has happened to Kansas,
to change her ways into the ordered
channels of the other, more regular
commonwealth. whose order and regu-
larity are but terms to describe insult
ferable monotony.
Kansas will always have abundance
OF crops: she will always bask under
the sun Of prosperity-the lovely thing
about her Is that she will get to the
horn of plenty through the slough Of
despond and swallow river of salty
tears as she opens her firm but beauti-
full mouth in the laugh which good
fortune brings.-Ottawa Herald.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
THE woRLp,s cosMoPoLIs.

The city of New York appropriately
is described as the cosmopolis OF the
world, for nowhere else are the con-
glomerate conditions of population so
marked, and there is no other city like
it with so small a proportion OF old
More than 5000, 900 of the inhabit-
ants of New York city. far larger
proportion than two-thirds, came from
other countries or were born OF for
eign parents. There are more than
cor. 900 Jews, from Russia, Germany,
Poland. Hungary. Austria, Roumania
and other countries; more than $780,
600 persons of Irish birth or Irish pa
rentage, figure larger than the popufa-
italians. a number exceeding the
population Of Naples; and of Germans
and German-Americans more than
there are people in Frankfort-Bos-
ton Globe.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1908-09-05
DEVICES FOR HOT NIGHTS.

For very hot nights, in quarters
where 1t is impossible to command a
breeze, and where sleep seems out OF
the question, it may be wooed with
success by the hot-water bag. OF
course, a hot-water bag is not always a
bag of hot water, and easily may be
made a bag of cold water. 1t is in this
from that ii comes handy in counting
sleep.
one of these cooling bags at the
head and one at the feet make a
combina alton that offers no encourage
ment to living awake You put towel
over the bag not quite filled with cold
water on which you intend to rest
your head. Then you stop astewing.
stop Tuning. feel quite cool and COM
Portable, and go to sleep when you get
readv-Milwaul<ee Wisconsin
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-05-03

Alexandra again as her maid of honor at
the next court, which will be held the 18th
Of this month. Miss Dawnay and the maid
of honor, whose marriage to Rev. Row
land Grant took place after Easter. re-
ceived a number of royal wedding gifts,
the queen giving her a sapphire and dia-
mond dragon fly brooch and an Indian
shawl, and the Prince and Princess of
Wales. a blue, enameled brooch surmount-
ed by the Prince of Wales feathers In dia
monds.
Mrs Hitchcock was hostess at a tea
complimentary to Mrs. Guy Howard, at
the Highlands. yesterday afternoon.
The Laurels held their semi monthly
social meeting Tuesday evening last at
the residence of Mr.. and Mrs. H. N. Will
liams in / street southeast. the evening
being pleasantly spent in playing progress
sive pitch. The first prizes were won by
Mrs. Leman and Mr.. Williams. consola-
ton prizes by Mrs. Altman and Mr.
Leman Refreshments were served at the
conclusion Of the games. Among those
present were Mr. and Mrs. A j. Tariall,
MIR. and Mrs. D. W. Leman. Mr.. and Mrs.
j. B Altman. Mr.. and Mrs. Gorge H.
Solbaeh and Mr.. and Mrs. H. N. VIII
liams.
Miss Mvfle Kite who has been the guest
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-05-03

Mrs. Brock Perkins. wife of Representa-.