davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
COMMERCIAL COLUMy
Weekly Review Of Trade and Latest
Market ReDorts
Bradstreet's says:

bTdubCTeeLS says
Trade, crop and industrial develop
ments of the week are mainly favor
able. The first Of the fall merchants
excursions are reported In leading
cities, thereby charging sales by job
bers and wholesalers. Industrial re.
ports are generally of increased time
run and enlarged output, and the
week nearer harvest: There are,
however, some features accompany
ing these developments deserving OF
note. There are statements from
quite a few markets that early fall
buying is hardly up to expectations
and that caution and conservatism
govern buyers actions.
In the industrials there Is per-
ceptibly more doing in iron and steel,
hardware manufacturing Western
coal mining and the lumber trade
generally. The railroads are certain
ly buying more of rails, cars and
also light supplies. The building
trade evidently turned the corner in
July, but reports Of curtailment In
output of certain lines of cotton
goods are still prominent.
Wheat, including -four exports
from the United States and Canada,
for the week, aggregated 3,696,34S
bushels, against 2,6O5,99S last week
and 3,272,993 this week last year.
For the six weeks ending August 6
this year the exports are 15.104,797
bushels, against 15,963,7O0 in the
corresponding period last year. Corn
exports for the week are 114,622
bushels. against: 1923 last week
and 1,107,621 in 1907. For the six
weeks ending August 6 the corn OK
ports are 34O,7S9 bushels, against
9,272,232 in the same peric' last
year.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Fine Courtesy In Alaska.

Life In Alaska Is uncouth In parts,
but 1t has its refinemenis. In val
DEE there lived man named Jake
who kept boarding house for dogs.
When the prospectors returned from
their sled trips they would place their
teams in his charge until ready to
start out again. AS he fed his guests
on garbage gathered by house-to-
house canvass he was known by ev-
cry one as "Slop Jake
Once upon a time he fell Ill and
the newspaper wished to chronicle
the fact. No one. however. knew
"Jake's" other name. and 1t didn't
seem worth while to waste the time
of the editorial staff on so insignifi-
cant detail. So the news went
printed thus:
"Our well-known fellow-citizen, S.
Jake, is confined to his house with
a severe cold. 1t is hoped he will
be out soon."-N. Y. Times.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Mule Had A Good Memory.

II was at Tampa when negro
teamster was instantly killed by an
army mule, and it furnished good
illustrations of the wonderful memory
that a mule has.
1.-THE negro teamster used to
pound that mule numerically. In
stead of using strategy and coaxing
his mule into submission, he used
to beat it hard enough to Kill
horse. Well, for two months the
teamster didn't drive that mule. But
the mule never forgot him. He
never made any attempt to inJure
his new driver, who knew enough
to treat him decently. But one day
the old teamster came back. Tho
mule remembered him. He waited
with as mucn docility and patience
as an OK until he was harnessed, and
then, when the old teamster was on
his guard, he let fly with both heels,
caught that negro in the pit of the
stomach, and stretched him out as
dead as a hammer. The other team
ster was standing right there by him.
but that mule didn't make any at
tempt to kick him. He had just
been laying for the fellow who wal
loped him two months before, and
when he had finished him he was
satisfied" Buffalo Horse World.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Advanced Thought.

He cannot justly be charged with
illiberality who "adheres to that
which is good" until a better Is pro-
vided. A starving man who casts
away a loaf of bread because he i'm.
AGNES a ten-course dinner ahead
even an agnostic would account a
fool. Why give up our Christian
faith. which has proved so GOOD, so
long as only the vague and ghostly
chimera of advanced thought is
proposed to take Its place? Some
of us know that faith in Christ is a
very real and precious and joyous
possession, a comfort IN sorrow, a
helm in trouble, a spur to higher
living, a source of assured hope for
the life beyond; what has science. or
human philosophy. or any OF the
thousand and one ,yagaries OF free
thought" to offer in its stead? A
ioyless life, rayless future, a
quenched soul-Nirvana!-The Ex-
aminer.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Married Pauners And Divorce.

"An odd thing about married
paupers Is that they like to live sep
arate," said a single pauper
You know how almshouses are
arranged: There's a mems ward. a
women's ward, and mixed, or mar
ried ward. Well, the mixed ward is
always nearly empty. Not that we
lacked married paupers. Oh, no. But
the husbands prefer to bachelor 1t
among the men, and the wives to
old-maid 1t among the women.
"The older our married paupers
get. the more vehement Is their in
sstence on separate living.
She's allus a-naggin.'' the octo-
genarian will growl.
Nobody can't sleep O nights
with sech snorin' as hisn,' shifts the
septuagenarian female.
And so they separate-to all in
tents divorced. "-Philadelphia Bull
letin.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
A Prediction.

One hundred and ninety-nine years
ago today the English-no, let us so
away back-299 years ago the
French-no, that isn't right-399
years ago the Indians-oh, pshaw,
400 years ago the Mound Builders
took Ticonderoga from the Cave
Dwellers. Then the Indians took it
from the Mound Builders and the
French took 1t from the Indians, and
then 1919 years ago today the English
took it from the French, and then
Ethan Allen, with the aid of the
Great Jehovah and the continental
congress, took it from the English,
and now you can take it from me that
no one else is ever going to take it
from anybody.-Boston Journal.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Rlind Men Seldom Smoke,

Blind men seldom smoke. Those
who were inveterate smokers in their
sighted days find that after losing
their sight a pipe or cigar has no
attraction for them. The man who
has no eyes to watch the smoke curl
and drift about his head apparently
has no use for cigar.
Smoking to the absolutely blind
Is something different from smoking
in the dark. Besides, few persons
smoke in total darkness. Usually
there is starlight or freight enough
to enable a man to keep track of the
smoke. When deprived Of that fasci-
mating pas.ime the cigar loses its
charm, and the man who is blind re-
signs himself to a smokeless old age.
m, Y, Press.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
THE COME and SEE sign

This sign is permanently attached
to the front of the main building OF
the Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine
Company, Lynn, Mass.
What Does This Sign Mean?
1t means that public inspection OF
the Laboratory and methods OF doing
business is honestly desired. 1tmeans
that there is nothing about the bus.
mess which is not "open and above
board"
It means that permanent invita-
ton is extended to anyone to come
and verify any and all statements
made in the advertisements OF Lydia
Z. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound:
Is it a purely vegetable compound
made from roots and herbs - With
out drugs?
Come and See.
Do the women of America continu.
ally use as much of it as we are told?
Come and See.
Was there ever such person as
Lydia E. Pinkham, and is there any
Mrs. Pinkham now to whom SICK
woman are asked to write?
Come and See.
Is the vast private correspondence
with sick women conducted by
women only, and are the letters kept
strictly confidential?
Come and See.
Have they really got letters from
over one million, one hundred
thousand women correspondence
Come and See.
Have they proof that Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound has
cured thousands of these women?
Come and See.
This advertisement is only Tor
doubters. The great army of women
who know from their own personal
experience that no medicine in the
world equals Lydia &. Pinkhams
Vegetable Compound for female ills
will still go on using and being ben
Gifted by it; but the poor doubling,
suffering woman must, for her own
sake, be taught confidence, forshe also
might just as we'll regain her health.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Eating The OctOpuS.

At Atlantic City the other day a
fisherman caught an octopus. a rare
fish in those waters.
The octopus which resembled a
frayed and ruined football of brown
leather. was carried home by the
fisherman in bucket of water.
What am going to do with it,"
he said why. Pm going to eat it.
I'd almost as soon eat octopus as
scallops.
81 am a traveller, and learned in
Italy and France the octopus excel
lence. You can't give an Italian of
the Riviera or a Frenchman of the
northwest coast, where the fish
abounds, a more welcome dish
What does it taste like? 1t tastes
like scallops or like tripe and oys-
tiers. "-Philadelph Bulletin.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
ALMOST A SHADOW
Gained 20 lbs. on Grape-Nuts.

There's wonderful difference be.
tween food which merely tastes
good and ono which builds up
strength and good healthy flesh.
1t makes no difference how. much
we eat unless we can digest it. It is
not really food to the system until it
is absorbed. A Yorkstate woman
says:
Il had been a sufferer for ten years
with stomach and liver trouble, and
had got so bad that the least bit of
food such as then knew, would give
me untold misery for hours after
eating.
Il lost flesh until l was almost
shadow OF my original self and my
friends were quite alarmed about me.
First dropped coffee and used
Postum, then began to use Grape
Nuts, although I had little faith 1t
would do me any good.
But l continued to use the food
and have gained twenty pounds in
weight and feel like another person
In every way. feel as If life had
truly begun anew for me.
II can eat anything | like now in
moderation, suffer no i'll effects, be ON
my feet from morning until night.
Whereas year ago they had to send
me away from home for rest while
others cleaned house for me, this
spring I have been able to do it my
self all alone.
my breakfast is simply Grape-Nuts
with cream and cup of Postum, with
sometimes an egg and piece of
toast. but generally only Grape-Nuts
and Postum. And | can work until
noon and not feel as tired as one
hours work would have made me a
year ago" There's a Reason"
Name given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek, Mich. Read, The Road to
MELVILLE" In pkgs.
Ever read the above letter? A new
ono appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true, and full OF human
interest.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
All EMPLOYEES Are Blind.

A business corporation has been
successfully established in Vienna by
men whu are totally blind. The
company manufactures brushes and
baskets and all its employees are
blind. In the eight months OF Its
existence 1t has filled orders aggre-
eating 23, 900 kronen ($4,60O. max
ing a fair profit and has enough or
ders on hand to justify the enlarge
ment OF its workshops. Sixteen OF
the employees are skilled workmen.
and the company wishes 1t known
that its wares are sold on their "ac-
tual merit" that they are tut upon
the market Gin fair competition with
the product of other concerns" and
that the blind people want business,
not charity. "-Chicago News.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
How Character Is Made.

One of the chief dangers OF life Is
trusting occasions. We think that
conspicuous events, striking experi-
ences, exalted moments have most
to do with our character and capacity.
We are wrong. Common days. mo-
notonous hours, wearisome paths.
plain old tools and everyday clothes
tell the real story. Good habits are
not made on birthdays, nor Christian
character at the new year. The Wis
ion may dawn. the dream may waken.
the heart may leap with a new In
spiration on some mountain top, but
the test, the triumph, is at the foot
of the mountain, on the level plain.
-Maltbie D. Babcock.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Red parasol Stopped Train.

A curious incident has COME to
light in connection with the stopping
of a London express train on the
CaIedonian main line near Rockcliffe
station, a few miles north of Carlisle.
The trainIwas running at full speed
when the driver observed a red oh.
ject by the side of the line which he
regarded as a danger signal ,.-r
The train was accordingly pulled
up, when it was found that the oh.
ject in question was red parasol
carried by a woman who, wishing to
cross the line at level crossing, was
awaiting the passing of the express.
,-London Daily Mail. e.,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
SHE COULD NOT WALK
Tor Notwithstanding Humor on
Ankles-Opiates Alone Brought
Sleep - Eczema Yielded to
CutiCura

II had eczema for over two years. had
two physicians, but they only gave me re
lief for a short time and I cannot enum.
crate the ointments and lotions used to
no purpose. My ankles were one mass of
sores. The itching and burning were so in
tense that could not sleep. could not
walk for nearly four months. One day my
husband said had better try the Cuticura
Remedies. After using them three times,
I had the best nights rest in months un.
less l took an opiate. / used one set of
Cuticura Soap, Ointment, and Pills, and
my ankles healed in short time 1t is
now a year since used Cuticura, and there
has been no return of the eczema. Mrs.
David Brown, Locke, Ark, May IS and
,Julv 49, 1907"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
The Limit.

Manager-Sir, your performance
of Hamlet is the very worst ever
represented behind the footlights. II
there had been any money in the
house, l should have been bound in
honor to return 1t at the doors. AS
it Is, several friends have sent in
and peremtorily ordered me to re-
move their names from the free list.
philadelphia Inquirer.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Ono WOmon's Wisdom.

Mrs. Newed-And you paid only
SO cents for that hat?
Mrs. Oldwed-That's all.
Mrs. Newed-Your husband was
delighted, of course!
Mrs. Oldwed-I hope you ooh
think I was foolish enough to tell
him | got such cheap hat.
Mrs. Newed-Where would the
foolish part come in?
Mrs. Oldwed-Why, II l told MIN
what it cost he'd expect me to De
satisfied with bargain-counter hats
all the rest of my days.-Chicago
NeWs
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Deathbed Statistics.

When a great man dies, no one IL
interested in learning who surround
ed his deathbed, but the news Is
always sent out People care no
more to know, than to hear II ne
were laid out in the parlor or bed
room, or If he were attired IN d
shroud or his regular clothes. But
an Atchison inquirer has measured
his bed, and finds that without un-
seemly crowding it will accommodate
sixteen. How, then, can thirty ana
forty surround the deathbeds of the
great men, as told in the telegraph.
-AtchiSOn Globe.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

A fully equipped daily newspaper
plant, with special telegraph serv-
ice and in charge of competent
newspaper man, is the plan of the
board of curators of the Missouri
State University at Columbia, Mo-.
for the new department OF journal
ism. The daily paper will be known
as the University Missourian g..
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Couldn't Disturb Her.

"Will you buy me a drum, brand.
mammal"
"No, dear; you would disturb me
with the noise
mo, | wouldn't. granny; Ia only
play it when you're asleep. London
Taller.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

the kidney secretions were badly dis
ordered. l was completely worn out
and discouraged when l began using
Doan's Kidney Pills, but they went
right to the cause of the trouble and
did their work we'll. have been
feeling we'll ever :ince."
Sold by all dealers. 80 cents box
Foster-Milburn Co, Buffalo. N. Y.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Information.

"Tell us about the letter you are
preparing"
Certainly, gentlemen" replied the
candidate. sweeping with genial eye
the circle of reporters. "You may
say that on the paramount issue I
express myself with utmost frank
ness"
But what is this paramount is
sue?"
1.-The croc'ior as to whether l ac-
cept or not. "-Philadelphia Ledger.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Watch The Professor.

Lecture upon the rhinoceros:
Professor must beg you to give
me your undivided attention. 1t is
absolutely impossible that you can
form true idea of this hideous
animal unless you keep your eyes
fixed on me.-Philadelphia Inquirer.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
A TRADE PAYMENT.

The Patient-"Doc. can't pay you
no money, while I amt got none,
Already. viii you dake it oud in
trader"
The Dentist-"Well, I might con-
slider that. What's your business?"
II lead leedl Choiman band. Ven
come aroundt und serenade you efrry
nighd for Q mont, yet."-Clevelsnd
Leader.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
ExCayatiDC,

Caddie Ito golfer, who has been
digging gashes in the turf all the
way round the course) be a
stranger to these parts, l suppose?
Golfer-Well, not exactly a stran-
ger. was born here, and all my
folks are buried hereabouts.
Caddie las the golfer skies another
piece of turf with his driver)-I
doubt you'll no get deep enough
with your driver; you'd better TAX
your iron.-Glasgow Bailie.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Up To Him.

The Fiance-But you admitted to
my sister yesterday that you were in
the wrong.
The Fiancee--Suppose | did?
The Fiance-Well, then, why don't
you make up with me?
The Fiancee--I will as soon as you
apologize. Press
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
A Multitude.

The sound of many voices rent the
air.
Through the streets resounded the
tramp of countless feet.
Military parade?
Oh. no. The original Taft man
was passing by.-Philadelphia Ledg-
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

Ave months In q
hospital I was dis
charged as incura-
BILE, and given only
six months to live.
MY heart was affect
ed. l had smother
ing spells and some
times fell uncon-
scious. I got so l
couldn't use my
arms, my eyesight
was impaired and
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
An Explanation.

Customer-Here. you said that was
a diamond of the first water and 1t
looks blush.
Jeweler-Well, we'll! They must
have got the bluing in the first water.
Chicago Journal.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
BAD Effects.

First Mother (reading letter from
son at college)-Henry's letters al
ways send me to the dictionary.
Second Mother (resgnedly) -
That's nothing, Jacks always send
me to tho bank.-London Opinion.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Genteel Restraint.

Judge-You'd better be careful, or
| shall commit you for contempt of
court.
The Lady-Don't be ard on me,
yer worship. I'm a-doin' me best
ter conceal me feelin 's.--The Sketch.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

Hicks Capudine Cures Women's
Monthly Pains, Backache, Nervousness,
and Headache. It's Liquid. Effects imme-
da,ey Prescribed by physicians with s,o Sss.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
His Idea.

Teacher-Tommy, what is fruit
less search?"
Tommy-When you're looking fer
apples in ther pantry an only find
potatoes.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
Far Better.

History states that hungry young
Ben. Franklin bundled into Philadel-
phia with roll
THAT was better than rolling into
town with a bun. "-Exchange.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

Hicks Capudine Cures Headache,
Whether from Cold, Heat, Stomach, or
Mental Strain. No Acetanilid or dangerous
drugs. It's Liquid Effects Immediately.
l0c., 25c., and &c., at drug stores.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

A mean trick to play on widow
is to expect her to remember that
she has ever had any experience
with the weak points of men.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

The usual way for man to learn
how to propose to girl is for her
to teach him.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

The only difference between an old
fool and a young fool Is that he
has had more practice.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
His Eternal "KnoN."

Christ did not build His Gospel on
q grand perhaps" but on the "eter-
nal .know."-Home Herald.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
When The Adamscs Move.

Mrs. K, while telling her children
about Adam and Eve and the beau
ties of the Garden of Eden, was in
terrupted by one of the tiny tots say
ing:
"Oh, mamma, when those Adamses
move away, let us get that place to
live in."-The Delineator.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13

What's the good of being good
IL you do not let people know 1t!
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
FIVE MONTHS IN HOSPITAL.
DISCHARGED Because Doctors Could
Not Cure.

Levi P. Brockway, 8. Second Ave..
Auoka. Mimi, says: "After lying for
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
To Drive Out Malaria and Build Up
the system

Take the Old Standard GROVES TASTE
LESS CHILL Tonic. You know what you
are taking. The formula is plainly printed
ON every bottle, showing it is simply Qu-
nine and Iron in tasteless form, and the
most etfectual FORM For grown peopls
and children. SOC,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1908-08-13
FOURTEEN HUNDRED AND
SKTY.FIVE MEN

with teams are selling our products to
FARMERS In thirty four different States.
Seventy useful articles that country people
need. We furnish the goods and give agents
time to turn them into money. Address, 1
J.R. WATKINS Co., Winona, MINI. |