New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1908-05-20

Garfield and Arthur The shortest oc-
cupancy Of the Office was that of VIII
liam Henry Harrison, only a trifie over
enc month Five presidents have died
in Office, three of whom were assassi-
nated-Lincoln, Garfield and Mckinley.
Lincoln and Mckinley were both war
presidents and were both at the be
ginning of their second terms There
are few other points of resemblance,
however, and, oh, what a difference in
their successors!
With the close of the present term
the length of life of the American
presidency will have extended over 100
years, an average of four years and a
trife less than ten months to each oc-
cupant.
AS to the nativity of our chief execu-
tives, all started out by obeying the
constitution, having been born in this
country. Some Of them, however, were
not so mindful of the instrument after
ward. Six were born in Virginia, five
in Ohio, three each in New York and
North Carolina, two In Massachusetts,
and one each in Kentucky, New Hamp-
shire, New Jersey, Pennsylvania ant
Vermont. At the time of election, how
ever, they were distributed as follows:
New York and Virginia, tie, each
having furnished five of the number.
OF these, however, one from Virginia,
Tyler, and two from New York, Fill
more and Arthur, were elected by the
people only to the vice presidency.
Next to these states come Ohio, with
four; Tennessee. with three, one Of
them, Johnson, a vice president; Illi-
nois and Massachusetts, each two, and
one each for Indiana, Louisiana, New
Hampshire and Pennsylvania
In politics two were Federalists, five
were Wings Of John Quincy Adams
can be so classe6, nine were Demo
Gratis. and nine were Republicans.
Few Were Bald.
The presidents have been long on
neither whiskers nor names Only
eight of them INDUCED in hirsute con-
cealment. OF these Lincoln went
smooth faced nearly all Of his life, but
had partial beard while in the White
House. Only four, Grant, Hayes, Gar
field and Harrison, had full boards.
The courtly Arthur supported a side
Whisker, while Cleveland and Roose-
welt are content with a mustache. It
is worthy Of note that but few of the
number have been bald.
The names of the presidents furnish
| rather interesting study The nu-
merous Smith, Jones and Brown fami-
lies have not been represented at ALL
Nearly all the names have been rather
unusual. Ten of them ended in en-
Most of them are rather courtly and
euphonious in sound, all but four, Polk,
Pierce, Grant and Hayes, having two
| syllables or more.
Only seven Of the presidents had
middle name, the second Adams, the
| first Harrison, Polk, Grant, Hayes,
| Garfield and Arthur. All the rest were
burdened with but one Christian name
| OF the entire number James leads,
with five; John follows, with three;
| Andrew and William have two each,
and George, Thomas, Martin, Zachary,
Millard, Franklin, Abraham, Ulysses,
Rutherford, Chester, Grover, Benja-
min and Theodore have each it's one.
All OF which reminds you that if you
want your son to be president don't
load him down with initials.
Following the law of averages. the
chief executive elected next November
should answer to the following de-
scription: He should live east of the
Mississippi and probably in the north,
the most likely ground being the states
Of New York and Ohio. He should be
about ffty-four years of age. He
should have rather unusual name
and probably only one Christian name
He should have little or no beard. He
should be a lawyer and a speaker,
though not an orator. He should have
seen military service. All these and
many other conclusions of no possible
value will the unfortunate reach who
tries to predict the next president by
making a composite photograph of
those that have gone before.
Many Near Presidents.
Who fills the bill? Judson Harmon
would fit all these specifications ex-
cept that Of age. He is sixty-two.
Robert M. La Toilette perhaps comes
closer than any other candidate, but
he has had no military service. But
neither has any other of the candidates
except Foraker and Bryan. Foraker
fits the description with some degree
OF accuracy, but Is sixty-two. AS to
Bryan, he is out Of the ordinary pres
idential zone geographically, is only
forty-eight years old and is an orator.
Barring military service, George Gray
and Joseph G. Cannon would come
near the mark were it not that one is
sixty-eight and the other seyenty-two.
And so it goes. Hughes fits several
specifications, but needs a commission
to explain away or otherwise get rid
of his Whiskers. Taft is short on mill
| tary service; also is overweight and
under age. John A. Johnson is not a
Low Sc, u