davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
humorous Department.
In the Grand Stand.

Shortly after Bob and Nellie be-
came engaged, Nellie insisted on going
to a ball game.
II just dote on baseball" she told
Bob.
Rather sudden, isn't t?" asked Bob.
who liked to sit on the bleachers,
where he could see better and seats
were cheaper When a fellow is en-
gagged to be married he'd better be
counting up the cost Of everything
even baseball games.
But you know, Bob, now that were
with each other all our lives, l must
take an interest in the things which
interest you"
Now wasn't that nice of Nellie?
So they went to the game and sat
in the grand stand.
Whats that?" asked Nellie, as
batter popped up a little fly back of
the catcher.
That's a foul" said Bob.
"A foul? Oh, my And what's that
thing he's pounding with his bat?"
That's the plate-the home plate"
"Oh. Bob. what did he do them"
And Nellie clapped her hands joyous
". as she saw the other ladies do.
He pounded out a fly" said Bob.
Baseball reminds me of the kitchen.
I'm so glad 1 came"
THE kitchen?"
"Yes-the batter, the fouls, the plate
and the flies"
"Oh, Lord" sighed Bob. Try to be-
come interested in the real points Of
the game, dear Keep your eye on the
diamond"
The diamond" Nellie's eys sought
her left hand. You didn't give me
one. Bob-nothing but a plain gold
band"
Bob kicked himself and wished he'd
left Nellie at home.
Watch the struggle now, Nell;
keep track Of the hits, see how the
men go out, and, finally, the difficulty
some of them have in getting home"
"Oh. Bob, that's just like marriage,
isn't it?"
What"
why, the men going out and the
the difficulty in getting home"
Say, I'm tired of this game; it's no
good" said Bob. Let's 60"
And all the way back to town Nellie
was wondering Why he looked so sour.
Chicago Record Herald.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
NINE EELEPHANTS TO A MAN.
Huge Bag Made BY Nine Dutch Hun
ters In South Africa.

To secure a bag Of eighty-one ele-
plants in these prosaic days will seem
like a dream to most sportsmen, but
the feat has been accomplished by j.
w. Viljoen and eight other Dutch far
mers in the Lomagundi district. The
government has just thrown the dis
trict open for the destruction of ele-
plants, and this enormous bag was
made within sixty miles of the capital
of Rhodesia, and near the railway.
Viljoen and his party pitched their
camp at Maquadzio, the centre of the
elephant district, and divided up into
pairs-a fact which nearly led to ia
tality, for going through the bush VIII
joen encountered his first elephant,
which he shot. AS this fell another
one crashed through the trees at the
back Of the hunter and pursued him,
once striking the horse with his trunk,
until Vijoen succeeded in reaching
clearer ground, where he found himself
thirty yards ahead of his pursuer
elephant, and killed it.
One incident marred the sport, and
that was the accidental shooting Of a
member Of the party named Eloff.
Eloff and three companions paired Off
and walked at a distance of about fifty
Yards apart, when Eloff and his friend
suddenly saw two elephants. They
fired, but only succeeded in shooting off
a tusk of one of the animals, who
promptly charged them. Eloff made in
the direction of the men in front of
him, and they, seeing the beast crash
ing through the bush behind them and
ignorant Of Eloff's whereabouts, fired
at the elephant and while one bullet
despatched the elephant, the other
found a bullet in Eloff's neck, killing
him instantly.
The party came back to the Trans
vaal the richer for 1000 pounds of ivory
and seven young elephants. The first
one was captured when half grown. 1t
was feeding with four grown elephants
all of which were shot, and then the
little one, instead of running away,
made for the hunters, two of whom
seized its tail. while the two others
hung on to each ear, and there was a
tussel for half an hour, after which the
elephant was rolled on its back and
its feet tied with the horses reins. 1t
was then fastened to a tree, and the
next day driven into camp. After a
day or two, it became so docile that
it's attentions were rather a nuisance,
for it tried to tread on the hunters
toes. helped itself to all the available
food. and would put its trunk into the
cooking pots and take out anything 1t
fanced. while it would follow the ma
tiVeS down to the stream for drink.
On the record day twenty elephants
were shot and two little ones captured.
Viljoen's unaided efforts accounted for
eighteen of the twenty slain. These
two elephants speedily became dOcile,
and now that all the captives are in a
proper kraal they have become quite
acclmatiZed to their new surroundings
and are both playful and friendly
Rhodesia Herald Weekly.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
The New Lamb.

A minister Of a fashionable church in
Newark had always left the greeting OF
strangers to be attended to by the
ushers until he read the newspaper ar
ticles in reference to the matter.
Suppose a representative should
visit our church." said his wife
wouldn't it be awful?"
1T would" the minister admitted.
The following Sunday evening he
noticed a plainly dressed woman In
one of the free pews. She sat alone
and was clearly not member of the
flock. After the benediction the minis
ter hastened and intercepted her at
the door
How do you do?" he said, offering
his hand. 81 am very glad to have you
with us.
Thank you," replied the young wo-
man.
'I hope we may see you often in our
church home" he went on. I'VE are
always glad to welcome new faces"
Yes, sir"
DO you live in this parish?" he
asked.
The girl looked blank.
"If you will give me your address
my wife and l will call on you some
evening"
you wouldn't need to go far, sir,
said the young woman. I'm your
ok"-Philadelphia Ledger.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
OUR BIG COUNTRY.
A Season When the Sun Never Sets
on the Stars and Stripes.

on the Stars and Stripes.
There is only one flag that the sun
never sets on-the British. But the
American flag is a close second, for
the sun during half the year never sets
on it either. That Is to say, these two
are the only flags that the sun is con-
tinuously shining over, no matter what
his position in the heavens-the one
all the year round and the other during
exactly half the year. from March %
to September %.
! OF course it is true that on no day at
all during the year can the sun be seen
from any two points Of continental
United States at all times during a
period of twenty-four hours. But the
United States naval observatory has
made careful calculations which by in
Guiding Alaska, Porto Rico and the
Philippines show that between the
spring and fall equinoxes the sun new
er ceases to shine in the eyes Of the
American eagle.
Perhaps nothing could make us real
ize how great a nation our expanded
country is better than this simple as
Economical fact. Moreover, within
these two dates there are also several
other pairs Of eastern and western ex-
treme points where the same condition
obtains, though for much shorter times.
1t is not generally known, but the
easternmost point in the United States
and it's island possessions Is in the is
land Of Porto Rico-longitude 65 de-
grees II minutes west, latitude IS de-
grees 20 minutes north. The western
most point is in Balobe island, in the
lippines-longitude 116 degrees 40
minutes east, latitude 8 degrees 0
minutes north. When the sun Is at
what the calendar makers call north
declination" Of 0 degrees 10 minutes
that is to say, on March % and on
Sept 22-it rises in Porto Rico at ex-
actly the same time that 1t sets in the
island Of Balobe. Between these two
dates during the winter months the
sun does set on the United States, and
during the remainder Of the year, the
summer months, 1t does not.-Scrap
Book.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

FEAR OF THE LAw.-"In Switzerland
this summer" said a Philadelphia, 81
heard Charlemagne Tower describe the
stringent police regulations of Berlin.
Mr.. Tower, by way of illustration,
concluded with little story.
Schmidt and Krauss met one morn
ing in the park.
Have you heard says Schmidt,
the sad news about Muller?'
No says Krauss. What is it?'
We'll, poor Muller went boating on
the river yesterday. The boat capsiz-
ed and he was drowned. The water
was ten feet deep
But couldn't he swim?'
Swim? Don't you know that all
persons are strictly forbidden by the
police to swim in the river?' Wash
ington Star
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
Magazine Clubbing Offered.

The Charleston News and Courier Is
offering upon extraordinarily liberal
terms several clubs Of high-grade
monthly magazines. They are posi-
lively the greatest money-saving club
bling offers ever put out by any news
paper in South Carolina, and are nat
urally attracting attention all over
the state. All propositions are open
for short time only to new and old
subscribers. Write the Magazine De-
partment, The News and Courier,
Charleston, S. c., at once for full par
ticulars and prices. Some Of the
Magazines represented are: The Out
ing Magazine, Bohemian Magazine,
Human Life, Paris Modes, Spare Mo-
ments, Mothers Magazine, National
Home Journal and the Uncle Remus
Magazine.
Splendid Magazines may be secured
very cheaply in connection with The
Weekly News and Courier, as we'll as
The News and Courier and Sunday
News. For example, a years sub
scription to The Weekly News and
Courier and year subscription to six
standard magazines will cost every
old and new subscriber only $3.50.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

w. A. McCorkle, living at 240 E
Black ST., Rock Hill, S. c.. says: 90
used Doans Kidney Pills with the
most satisfactory results. l had beer
troubled with severe pains in the small
Of my back for several weeks, and suf-
fered intensely. At times sharp shoot
ing twinges would dart through the
kidney regions, and in the morning
always suffered more severely. Some
time ago I procured a box Of Doan's
Kidney Pills and they cured the at,
tack. have not been bothered since
and heartily give them my endorse
ment."
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
Legal Blanks
and Forms

ASSORTMENT TO BE FOUND AT
THE ENQUIRER OFFICE.
The following Blanks in approved
forms, on good paper stock, may be
had at The Enquirer Office:
Chattel Mortgage
Lien and Mortgage on Crop
Promisory Note
Mortgage of Real Estate
Title to Real Estate
Subpoena Writs
Subpoena Tickets.
Prices on any Of the above in quan-
ity upon application.
L. NJ. GRISTS SONS.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

HAD TO COME SOME TIME.-Here Is
the latest storyette about honeymoons
says the Detroit News Tribune:
This time the happy couple had gone
to the lakes for their trip and spent
the first morning boating gloriously
about Windermere.
"Oh, TOM" exclaimed the bride
isn't it heavenly? Let's send a tele-
gram to papa an6 mama and tell them
what a perfectly scrumptious time
we're having. Let's say: Getting or
splendidly. Grand row before break
fast"
Forty minutes later telegram was
laid on the breakfast table Of the pa
rents.
The old man read it and sadly SHOOK
his head.
All" he exclaimed dOlefully they
have begun already, my dear"
What is ito" anXiously inquired the
fond mother.
Listen to this, my dear: Grand
row before breakfast Well, we'll,
suppose it had to come some time"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

ALSO 4 TRAvELER.-A distinguished
traveller and war correspondent on a
lecture tour in Scotland spoke one
night at little village four miles from
a railway station.
The chairman Of the occasion, after
introducing the lecturer as "the mon
wha's come here tae broaden oor in
tellects," said that he felt that a wee
bit prayer would not be out Of place.
And, o Lord" he went on, pit it
intae the heart O. this mon tae speak
the truth, the hale truth and naething
but the truth, and gle us grace tae
understan him."
Then. with a glance at the lecturer,
the chairman said, I've been travel
er meself!"-Youth' Companion.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

SAILORS LIFE HARD-Capt. Pritch-
ard Of the record breaking Mauretania
told a group Of Americans on recent
voyage that a sailors life was hard
one.
1T is not so hard as it used to be
hefore the coming of steam," he said,
but it is still fearfully hard, for all
that. In fact, l never heard of but one
man who had decent excuse for going
to sea.
And who was he. captain?" said a
Chicagoan.
Noah" the captain answered. For
if the old fellow had remained on shore
he would have been drowned. WASH
ington Star.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
DOING THBIR DUTY.

Scores of YorkvilIe Readers Are Learn
ing the Duty of the Kidneys.
To filter the blood is the kidneys
Guty.
When they fail to do this the kidney:
are sick.
Backache and many kidney ills fol-
low;
Urinary trouble. diabetes.
Doans Kidney Pills cure them all.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

For sale by all dealers. Price so
cents. Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo,
New York, sole agents for the United
States.
Remember the name-Doan's-an
take no other.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
CLOTHES CLEANING.

7 AM prepared to clean gentlemen's
l. clothes and ladies' skirts in a thor
oughly satisfactory manner, at rea-
sonable prices. Work may be sent d.
rect to my home or left at w. E. Fer
gusOn's store
Mrs. r. B. McCLAIN.
"a st
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

r. On what day of the year do wo-
men talk the least? The shortest day.
III Why is a washerwoman like Sat
urday? Because she brings in the
close (ClOtheS) of the week.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
LANCAST

News, September 2: The smoker
given last Saturday night by the Dixie
Council, Jr, o. u. A. NJ. was decid-
ed success in every particular. The
attendance was large, the hall being
crowded, and the refreshment feature
was all that could be desired. ......
Mr.. w. \. Ashe, one of the propre-
tors of the Catawba brick works. has
built a fine road from Van Wyck to
Steele Hill, a distance of about three
miles Mr.. Lester Sistare, one of the
progressive farmers of the Riverside
section, says Mr. Ashes work is an
object lesson in road building. which is
we'll worth going to see. Mr.. Les
ter Robinson is noI the only voter who
narrowly escaped drowning on the
day of the first primary, as related in
The News the next day. Mr. John
Vaughn had a similar experience. He
was returning home from Heath
Springs, where he had gone to vote,
and on reaching Camp Creek, although
the stream was swollen, he concluded
to risk it, Before getting across how
ever, the mule he was riding COM
pletely disappeared with the exception
of it's ears, having plunged into hole
washed out by the raging waters.
Managing to retain his seat, Mr..
Vaughn held the mule up by the bride
as best he could. Finally getting out
Of the creek he discovered that the
animal-his best mule-had been bad
ly crippled, and it is still unable to
walk except ON three legs.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
CHESTER.

Lantern, September L: Miss Willie
Wrenn, of York county, who has been
visiting her aunt, Mrs. ]. D. Felts,
went home Saturday. ......A burglar
entered Mr.. S. Z. Wylies home on Co
lumbia street Sabbath night, proba-
bly, while they were at church. and
ransacked the house. AS much as
was wanted to eat was taken off the
dining table and some money belong
ing to Miss Marie McCrOrey was taken
out OF her purse but the purse was
left. Nothing else has been missed. 1t
is not known how the burglar enter
ed the house. but it may have been by
unlatChing, in some way, the lattice
door at the rear end of the hall
About two o'clock the same night 4
burglar went to Mr.. G. b. Belts house
on the same street. A box was plac-
ed under the dining room window
which is several feet from the ground
and by cutting a slat out of the blind
it was an easy matter to unfasten the
blinds. \ stick was placed under the
window screen and he climbed in,
leaving the track of his bare feet,
which had been wet with the dew, on
the wall outside and also in the dining
room. He went around the table and
on to the door of Mr.. Belts room and
opened it. Fortunately Mr.. Belts was
awake and hearing the walking, call
ed to Mrs Belts and asked if it was
she She replied in the negative and
the intruder shut the door and ran
back the way he came. By the time
Mr.. Belts could turn on the lights and
get his pistol the intruder was out
and closed the blinds behind him. He
was heard running around the house
and down the street and Mr.. Belts
shot after him twice. The track was
small, apparently that of boy or
small man. 1t was probably the same
one that went into both houses. ......
Mrs. Mary Williams, of YOrkville spent
Saturday with Mrs. Auburn Woods on
her way home from Columbia. .....
Mrs. w. B. Wylic. Of Yorkville, came
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
AT THE BRATToN FARM.

Separated Cream, Sweet Milk, But
termilk, Cream, Butter, Vegetables and
Fruits, delivered in Yorkville on Tues
days and Fridays or at the farm at all
times. Postal card mailed in the af-
ternoon will receive attention next
morning.
]. MEEK BURNS, Manager
Ian ?5 TT ~
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04
CHE 4lurkrille Gnquirrr.
Entered at the Postoffice as Second
Glass Mail Matter.
Published Tuesday and Friday
PUBLISHE
w. d. GRIST,
o. Z. GRIST,
A. M. GRIST.
Published Tuesday and Friday

TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION:
Single copy for one year ....-.$ 2 90
One copy for two years ...... SO
One copy for three MONTHS. so
One copy for six months .... 1 90
Two copies one year ......... s 5O
Ten copies one year ......".. IL 5O
And an extra copy for club OF ten.
ADVERTISEMENTS
Inserted at One Dollar per square for
the first insertion, and Fifty Cents per
square for each subsequent insertion.
A square consists of the space occu-
pied by ten lines Of this size type.
- Contracts for advertising space
for three, six and twelve months will
be made on reasonable terms. The
contracts must in all cases be confin-
ed to the regula' business Of the firm
or individual CT ntracting, and the
manuscript muSt be in the Office by
Monday at noon when intended for
Tuesdays issue, and on Thursday at
noon, when intended for Fridays is
sue.
- Cards Of thanks and tributes Of
respect will be inserted at the rate OF
10 cents line
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1908-09-04

ri Debts are about the only things
that grow bigger by contraction.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
THE GOSPEL OF OWNERSHIP.

Offers lease land farming
settler lend him
anybody
ildren
The Hawaii population stop
and the country elsewhere the Union the individual
owner The lease system gne European is the bane of England
class which will Naturally
he along soven getting what the land
little the building possible People America
the of thousands this
abhor it. There by
ton o people OF alien
8 the corr
porations will absorb about
That looks anything
Something
diversified farming would yield at least Everywhere
largely fixed by lack great
deal land than proftab But it question
buying price taxes it, the grab
opspa the small bonafe settler buying prefer
ence to the corporation. .-r@
greatest thing possible development
but opposition it The of old New York tried
enlightened public sentiment overthrow their
scuy illinois, who landlord and tenant system there had
The
gbbers will surely take their whenever the voting
the laws which efectua
ded up the AM j New
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
1Mn1TanArIoN prnrI.s

College, which was also an address
to tho the United States behalf
question immigration
aliens constantly pouring parts
world he said h points friction this country
other
the spirit being smohed
growing century
tactful presidential
bunt in thousands editorials speeches
Originally which
Ameransm which Independence
Englmen principally Dutch
French subsidiary dominating spirit
that impaired principles to the population stability Christian living
mmeaing naonait
numbers the nation founders left
political
Much feared of the Irish immigration which followed
i'll in
family from the original stock They
and their the
soil objects assimilation
and would do good if he did.
This easily absorbed population practically stopped coming
getting
the unassmiab Asia
Newport and that anticipated trouble eventually
open
It
Every thoughtful
n
body without
decently socitous
aliens The attempt
possible
mpaiing quality.
in public liberation
toward order of things which customary in the old world
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
ANNEXATION.


with Territory Luckily before the colonial policy of the
that the Philip
legislative rights
possessions grated
two
Spanish history blessing
the the had that The
led by the Stephen M White
resolution which guide action the the
Then the declaration of
military Hawaii, which
hastily possible
their fighting
the Pacific radius less miles,
GOLFERS
because of all this these islands annexed
the mainland market political
money Many propheed
o.
The last the old Hawaii sandsl
industry apprecb growing relations
than height
Of the that the China
almost splendid industries
this capital of the islands generally
Hawaiian prosperity maang
fifteen which well might
O u precious holiday.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
1AuKEA AND HIS CRITICS.

The chairman the
creton' When
Office that the Civic Federation intelligent highly
intelligent majority
his feeble him
the Sefs
administrations
penalty this
public
he nothing
wrong he
the Mort heirs is absolute, the legal
whole proceeding showed that Kok incompatible
Judicial
nevertheless thoroughly Isoi the hereafter,
with his nefarus business brefore
his morals
terms of call for the o Kepokaif
But resignation
that ukea's principal remarkably mildly
committee body holding
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
HALF A HUNDRED
TEACHERS FOR OAHU

President Griffiths of Oahu College
is expected back from his vacation trip
to Japan on the steamship Mongolia
the latter part of the present month.
His return will be marked by the
commencement of active preparations
for the opening of the fall term Of
Oahu College, for which event a fac
ulty of forty-seven teachers will be in
attendance. Four additional teachers
will arrive shortly from the mainland.
The fall term will also mark the
opening of the new Alexander athletic
field. There will be ceremonial when
the field is opened to athletic events,
and there is a likelihood of a stone
tablet being placed in the hillside OF
the amphitheater section denoting the
giver of this valuable acquisition.
The Hawaiian gazette. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1865-1918, 1908-08-14
rHH IoopHoLE RusrNnss.

Techncaites of justice An mayb 4
driving T.
charge although it be clear that defncd
law and ina ndang life and limb What Justice thS
photographer is M
them dealer evidence
offered but the thrown negatives
pictures This justice charged
having stolen hog his pig nd
hog, the thief s7 e ~ ftta.7i NE
1t is the European America that
punishment
the which justice stanged by technical qibbng
is indicted clubbing citizen nsensbty
did
things
has been guilty breaking
which he may his visible deserts
1t is history repeating itself In ancient times
laws make
nit law
United might prcftably do this in fifty