davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Chamuaone From S9onges.

"The champagne makers OF Reims
buy lot Of our spOngcs." said whole
sale dealer. They squeeze champagne
out Of them. They must squeeze IN the
years course 100000 bottles OF cham
pagne out OF SponseS. Mystifed. aren I
you? But there is no mystery about
the matter. Champagne, as IT fer
ments. is powerful stuff. 1t breaks the
strongest bottles, and in the past all
champagne that broke It's bottles and
ESCAPED was lost Now, though, they
pack the champagne bottles in clean
sponge. and every day or two they go
over the plant. and II any of the bot
Ties have broken they squeeze into
casks the wine that the sponges have
retained. This wine, reclarlhed, re-
fined and bottled again. makes a very
good second quality drink. k."-Cincin-
natl Enquirer.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Rock Candy.

"Originally what is now known as
rock candy" explained confectioner
TO a reporter. "was called in the trade
Gibraltar rock. Originally, also, 1t was
the purest kind OF candy, for It was
crystallized sugar pure and simple.
Ordinarily 1t IS purer now than many
other candies. Hawthorne, in 'rhe
House OF the Seven Cables describ.
ing n small store. says. For instance,
there was \ glass pickle jar flled with
fragments of Gibraltar rock-not, In
deed, spllnters Of the veritable fortress.
but bits OF delectable sandy Other
writer's OF even earlier date than that
speak OF Gibraltar rock. 1t appears,
however. that the Gibraltar was finally
dropped. and it became known as rock
candy. have q price list issued In
1S48 to the candy trade in which Gil
braltar rock is the name given, though
after that It is quoted as rock candy.
Throughout England 1t Is known as
Gibraltar almost exclusively outside OF
the large cities. In the latter, as here,
the Gibraltar is dropped, and it is
called rock candy"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Tha Hancinn Judne.

When Lord Norbury, "the hanging
judge" as no was called In Ireland.
was sentencing n man to death for
stealing q watch. he said:
"My good fellow. you made n grasp
at time and caught eternity
Nothing seemed 70 please Lord Nor
bury more than the continual cproaT IL
court, created by his puns.
what Is your occupation, ny homes.
man. he asked witness.
please. your lordship, L keep n
racket court"
$50 do l." said tho 1udge.
When Lord Norbury was being
buried, tho grave was so deep that the
ropes by which the undertaken was let
ting down the coffin didn't reach to the
bottom. Tic coffin was left hanging
midway while somebody went for new
ropes.
AYE" cried one in the crowd. give
him rope cnorCh; don't stint him. lie
was the boy that never grudge6 rope
to a poor body"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Mr.. Barrie's Page.

]. N. Barrie. the popular noveilst
and playwright, glorified tobacco more
than once. but on a certain occasion he
tried to induce smoker to desist. II
happened thus:
Mr.. Barrie returned to his rooms one
day and discovered his page boy puff
ing hard at a dirty clay pipe.
"My boy" said the novelist. III Is
very bad for you to smoke that coarse
black twist. You will make yourseii
old before your time"
And 50 he went on till he had deliv-
,red a long and what he believed To-
be telling lecture A day or two later
the youth left without giving notice.
and shortly afterward Mr.. Barrie
brought some friends to his Fat Prom.
fslna them a special treat. lie went 10
q cabinet where he kept Z store ~
very choice cigars. You can imagine
his chagrin when he discovered thai
the cigars had vanished. and in thei'
place was the page boys clay pipe an'
the following note:
Dear Sir-I agree With you that II j.
bad for a boy to smoke twis. VIII no
smoke any more twist till have finished
your cigars.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Some Animals IN Winter,

The ptarmigan, a member or inc
grouse family, Is in summer m0ttlcd
with black and n rich fluffy brown
but in winter 1t becomes pure white.
The snowy owl and the snow buntings
that come to US from the far north
have whitish plumage that blends har-
moniously with the prevailing white
ness of the landscape. But perhaps
the most interesting example OF all Is
the weasel. whose fur in the summer
has a peculiarly soft shade OF reddish
brown, but in the winter Is pure white
except at the tip Of the tail. 1t is
probable that this black point Is nseful
to its owner in diverting the attention
of q carnivorous bird or of beast or
prey. as the black spot is more readily
seen than the white body Of the an
inal. 1t is said. too, that If the tip IS
covered with snow the whole weasel
becomes clearly visible and that If the
first snowfall Is later than usual 1t IS
claimed by some naturalists that the
color change IS delayed accordingly.
The turning white takes place when
most needed.-St. Nicholas.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Only Ch7naina the Tune.

"Tha man escaped u.s." said the de'
tectiyc. He ,ia.l Invented new dodge.
That. y0,I Sc. t. tIc trouble about the
ccience of detection The minute we
detectives master all the old tricks
something new springs up.
ut is rather like the story Of the
thirsty butler. When you keep a cask
Of beer under lock and key In the Gel.
lar, only giving the butler the key
when you want him to draw you Il
pitcher then, If you make him whistle
all the time he Is out OF sight on this
errand. you are bound not to be de-
irauded, eh? Or so at least 1t was
In the past.
"Well, there was a man who engaged
a new butler. and. as of yore, the first
day he wanted beer he said:
flames, here are the keys to the
beer closet. Take this pitcher down
and fill it. And mind you whistle all
the while you do it.
"'Yes, SIR said James, and he de,
parted whistling.
The clear, sweet notes of Home
Sweet Home foated upstairs for q
minute or so, then they ceased. The
master rushed to the cellar door.
"James, he shouted angrily, what
are you doing?
"'Nothin', sir: only changin' the
tune "-WashingtOn Star.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
America Alone Has HumrinQ Birds.

America Alone Has Humming Birds.
Though the art museums OF Europe
may have some treasures or which
America cannot boast, our continent
has the distinction Of q monopoly OF
the worlds supply of humming birds,
the gems of all the feathered creation.
OF these there are said to be some 400
species-the Four Hundred we may
well call them-nearly all Of which
are peculiar to the tropical regions.
Only eighteen cross the borders Of the
United States from Mexico and occur
only In our southwestern states. Tho
popular idea Is that the hummer lives
only on honey gathered from flowers.
This is mistake. The bird does Sc
cure some honey, but its food consists
mainly Of the small insects which fire.
auent the flowers. Some Of these IN
sects are Injurious 10 the blossom, and
the tiny bird fulfllls a useful function
In destroying them. That the hummer
Is insectivorous is also shown by its
habit OF catching tiny insects on the
wing, which Is occasionally Observed
II. K. Job In Outing Magazine.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10

The young mother, who was trying
to put the baby to sleep, had darkened
the room. Somebody tried to enter the
side door. and she went and opened 1t
"I beg your pardon" said the elderly
matron who had come up on the porch,
but ls+sihis rcuge for Fent--------
"Not at ALL"
Seeing the blinds down, l thought
there was nobody living here, and as
am looking for house was going to
step in and inspect It."
"Well, it's not empty, and it's not Tor
rent. ma'am. The reason why the
blinds are down, II you must know
"Oh, see. The lace curtains are In
the wash. Well, we oil have to clean
house once in awhile. Sorry to have
troubled you. Good day:"-Chieago
Tribune.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
a Dismal Failure.

A young jobbing firm in New York
overbought for the fall trade. Their
heaviest mistake had been in line OF
overcoats. which, 1t looked, they would
have to carry over a season. Efforts to
get cash for the stock were fruitlesS
except at rulnous rates. At last the
firm went to an old timer in the trade
for advice.
"Well," said the man OF experience,
you've got pretty good list OF Gus
toners. Just divide the coats up into
lots Of thirteen each. Send a batch
apiece to some of your sharpest Gus
toners, but make out the bills for
twelve. They'll be so tlckled to get
one coat for nothing that they'll take
'em ALL"
The scheme had been tried before
the men met again. The old timer
waited for his praise.
"W'ell, didn't they keep the coatsT
be asked.
Yes returned the JObber sadly.
zone each-the one that wasn't billed" "
New York Times.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Saw His Own Finish.

Some time ago the wife OF Judge
Blank lost her cook. and, ~'nce she had
no other resource, she rolled up her
sleeves and for q week provided such
meals as the Judge had not enjoyed
since those happy days when the
Blanks did not keep a cook. The
Judges delight was so great that by
way Of appreciative acknowledgment
he presented Mrs. Blank with beau
tiful ermine cloak. Quite naturally the
incident was good deal noised about
among the social acquaintances OF the
Blanks and a spirit OF envious emula-
ton was developed in certain quarters.
II was in this mood that Mrs. Jerome
recited the story to her husband.
what do get. Jerry" she asked
If will do the cooking for q week"
"Ne;." said Mr.. jerome, "at the end
Of week. my dear. you'll get one OF
those long Grape veils."-Argonaut
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
whon She Goes 70 the Iheater.


al lust don't want any seats at all
lnless they're gocl ones. The last
lime I was here | sat behind post,
and | said right then that I'd never
come into the place again lf-l think
those over there might do Huh!
Um-m-ml Mighty funny how all the
good seats are taken before the box Of
Gee opens.
"No. | don't want those. There's q
post in the way. and, besides, the Wot-
shcrname family always sit there and
chatter through the whole play. Yes,
there Is q post too. l guess I've been
IN this theater before. wouldn't mind
those, but they're right by the bass
drum, aud you can't hear yourself talk.
"What! Two dollars apiece for that
kind of show? And not next to the
aisle. either Lots Of pSople say you
can see just as good and hear better
in the balcony, anyhow. Well, you
can give me those two down there.
They're not as good as I'm used to
having, but guess No, l don't be-
lleve III take them, either
Cant you lay aside those two, and
those two, and those two for me, and
when | decide I'll send my husband
around after them? Huh? Well,
think you're very unaccommodating.
What? OF course l want to buy seats.
Just you give me those two, young
man. without any comment Of any kind.
Impertinentr'- r'-Indlanapolis News.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
CarnnAts-

1t Is q mistake TO suppose that dukes.
marouiscs and other noble Britons
sleep in their coronets! rn fact. they
never wear them at all except at the
coronation Of the sovereign. wen they
put on their coronets 1T the precise inc
ment when the p:lmate Of England
places the crown upon the anointed
brow OF tie King or queen. And when
a peer or pccress dies the co:onet l.
again used at the funeral. being placed
Ia the coffin or borne Oh a purple cllsh'
ion behind the heorse by one Of the
attendants. That is the extent q
which the ceronet IS used according 70
the onc.al rules alI regulations. But
sometimes they are made TO serve 9th
or purposes than those for which they
were intended. They are made OF sill
vsr gilt, edged with ermine and lined
inside with q purple velvet cap topped
with a gold tassel and are quite orna
mental baubles. One belonging to q
noble marquis which was sold at auc
ton In London had been cut In hall
and arranged to serve as brackets FOL
candlesticlzs.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Billet cnoco.

Ballet shoes fit like a stocking. Inc!
are of leather. with Il thin leather sole
about an inch wide and with the UP
pers sewed so that they come unde'
the foot The ballet dancer wants no
rubber heels, instep arch supports nor
any other Of the foot supporting OF
reforming devices which are common
" used by ordinary mortals. The toe
dancer desires n hard box toe on her
ballet shoes, but the ordinary dancer
seeks only shoes that Will give perfec'
freedom Of movement Of the joints and
muscles OF the feet. IT Is rule oil
good dancers, q shoe man OF expert
ence says. to wear shoes that will al
low for space between the toes. 1t Is
a point of good fit that all persons
should heed, he says. High heels are
put on to stage shoes for effect. not tc
promote good dancing. Many stage
shoes are made with short fore parts
and high heels to make the feet look
smaller and the person taller.-Bostor
Glohq
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10

The familiar expression. IAN AK 10
Zrlpl." frequently attributed to Benja-
min Franklin. originated with Charles
Miner. who introduced the following
tale Of woe IN 4 short, plthy essay pub
lIshed I'm a country newspaper of Penn
svlvanla during the year 1911: A little
bov IS asked by q man with an Ak and
an engaging smile If his father has
grindstone. and, the family being In
proud possession OF that implement OF
welfare, the youngster leads the way
into the back yard.
What a fine little fellow you are?'
exclalms the stranger. quite casually.
as though scarcely conscious Of speak
ing loud. OF course the boy becomes
pt once his most obedient servant and.
by more well directed praise. brings
water to whct the wheel and heroic
ally turns the grindstone until his
small hands sting with blisters. But
the moment the Ak is ground its owner
calls his little fetch and carry slave
rascal" crushes his newborn mani!
pride by bidding him hurry or to
school.-Ios Angeles Times.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
An Auction Room Incident.

II was an auction sale on Marker
street and the auctiOneer was disgust
ed. He had offered watch and cham
which he claimed to be worth SD. Ihe
first bid WAS 81. and lie could not gel
a second. III find out If there Is an
ounce of nerve IN this crowd" said be.
and. taking one dollar note from his
wallet. he held II up and asked FOR
bids. A laugh went through the
crowd. but for a couple of minutes no
one bid on the note. Come on" SAID
the auctioneer. What is the matter!
Don't you think the bill Is good!
After another moment the voice OF a
small boy was heard. Five cents
he said. That's the gang, -sarr the
n t..tt,,G1,S4e1Srf--.>.ITynoTl make 1t 1O?" 4
man In the crowd bid 10 cents. and the
boy raised 1t 10 II. The bidding went
on until the little fellow had got 10
05 cents. when the auctioneer handed
him the note. He gave the auctioneer
another note and got Il nickel change
The auctioneer then treated the crowd
to a lecture on courage.-Philadeiphla
Record.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Darodil Poisoning.

A large number of plants which are
usually looked upon rs harmless pos
sess poisonous properties. says the
Dundee Advertiser Those who are
emp'oyed- 'ies.Hs is!s .aS sesa'!s a2a'
cissus frequently suffer severely from
a troublesome skin affection known as
"daffodil poisoning" The most trying
feature Of this allment Is the small
gatherings which form under the mn
ger nails. 1t is said that minute crys-
tails of lime exist In large numbers In
the Juice OF the stems Of the pretty
blooms and that these are responsible
for the poisoning. Regular dafodil
pickers are accustomed to rub their
hands with oil and work tallow In un-
derneath their finger nails before be-
ginning their work. The bulbs OF the
white Roman hyncinth have similar
unpleasant properties.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
EcNnOmN.

Economy IS the science Of buying q
two dollar hat for S3.75 when n gooc
one ma hc had for s.. II IS n harm
less and fascinating pursuit for those
who can afford It. but a poor man mas
no busjIr,ss to fr,ttor away his time
and subs. .ance Oh such eXtrayagances.
Women me particularly addicted to II
and often oecome so sEillful that they
are able to get through January with
ont encro,cl,ing on their April allow
ance. Neil who have such wives are
naturally Ycry proud of them and are
willing 10 -cdoul!e their efforts. II nee
essary. in 2,7ler 20 provide them with
tla means u develop the habit.-Life.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Letter Writino In Ancient Babylon.


It can easily he understood that the
reading and writing of cuneiform was
not an accomplishment in the posses
sion OF every one Nevertheless there
were plenty of scribes everywhere. es-
pecially in the cities, where they sat
at the temple gates to be at the service
Of the public. The frequent represen-
tations of scrlbes are hence interesting
and show that in addition to clay tab
lets the RaEyloaians used some sort
Of flexible material to write upon. The
large number of letters which have
been excavated, many of them from
the ninth century before Christ, indi-
cate that n very active correspondence
was carried on in Babylonia by means
Of messengers, but even more active
was the use OF writing In commercial
dealings. which was strictly enforced
by law. Nothing was legally binding
unless It was done into writing In
the presence of witnesses.-Professo
Friedrich Dclitzsch In Harper's Maya
zine.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
What Did He Meant

Mike Maloney's wife was an invalid.
and the doctor had been doing all
sorts of things for her. changing the
medicine so often that poor Mixes In
come would scarcely reach and make
both ends meet, and Mt last the doctor
said that his wife must go to warm
er climate.
Mike listened to that advice for sew
eral months. and finally when October
came the doctor told Nike one Satur-
day evening after al Of his weeks
wages had been spent that bis wife
positively must BE- sent Ito warmer
climate without delay"
Mike left the room for n few min
ntes, and when he returned he was
wIping his eyes with his left hand,
while with lis rlgA hand he brought
nn ak. which he gayt to the physician
saying:
4 bate 10 do doc. You please
e It for me- asas CITY IndsDsnd'
ent
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Extravsoaoce Of the New Yorksr.


Is not the native New Yorker the
prey and the plaything Of the waiter,
the cabman. the ticket speculator and
the market man? Does he not pay two
prices for food in the glittering Broad
way cafe and then, after waiting al
hour, receive a cold, dead portion o.
something that he didn't order and
never would think Of ordering unless
delfrfous! Does he not recognize that
the legal tariff OF cab charges Is pure
fiction and fork over what the weather
beaten Rube Burrows on the top OF the
hanson may demand? Does he not
DDrt, oh, what's the use! The scales
they weigh him on at birth give false
returns, and at MS funeral the under
taker charges his estate for exttir;a. car
riages that never show up.-I. s. Cobb
In New York World.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Interested.

81 had a narrow escape from being
run over this morning" remarked
Johnson. Hughes, who was with me,
only saved me by showering blows Oh
the horses head with an umbrella.
Just as the umbrella broke the animal
stopped, and was pulled out from be-
meath the wheels Of the wagon"
"Had the umbrella a silver handle
shaped like a shepherds crookT asked
his friend Binks anIiously.
'T didn't notice particularly, and, be-
sides. he broke 1t to pieces stopping
the horse. Why?
Nothing; only he borrowed mine
yesterlly y."-Pearsons.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
or. ~ o. Marian Life.

That .ei; 81 lars Il founded on no
agsun.r. IL Int ca masscl evidence
fiat IS &C clUaiyc. and the reader
should ,-a,... tha5 opposition TO the
j5ea ~ haye proof Of life
on Ma. .no. ascd o;S. reason but Oh
emotion. ~ ever specioUsly cEUSrrvet-rr
Al scientific objections have been met
and shown 4 1enable rs TO telnpera-
ture. snow, &c. but human prejudice
rs W. II the Copcrnican system or the
origin cf spec'ps. time alone can dispei
Professor Low ell In Century.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
His FIattery.

Eyes. ma'am." the convict was say
ing. 'I'm here jIst for tryin' to hatter
a rich man
.The idea.' exclaimed the prison VS.
itor.
ayes. ma'am: fist tried to initiate
his signature OH a cheek
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Francois Roads Best In Tho WocI,

Frances Roads Best In tho Worio.
Among the reasons which make the
highways OF France the best In the
world Is tho requirement that all pre-
liminary roadmaklng operations shall
be thoroughly performed. When en-
b9nkments are made the earthwork Is
built up only few inches at a time
and the successive strata are levcled
and In the neighborhoOd OF masonry
rnmmed. Every ditch is carefully cut
at q proper angle. rammed and II
necessary paved with stones. Danger
GUS turns are protected by stone para
pets. At each crossroad there are sign
posts, always in order. and the Touring
club Of France has established indi'
Gators to remind the tourist OF danger
Gus curves, rapid descents, etc. Every
railroad crossing Is protected by q
gate. which has a watchman In charge
day and night-Leslie's Weekly.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
The lJtility of the Ok.

should think the OK is the most
useful - postmortem - OF all animals.
We eat its flesh. We make manure or
its blood. We use its horns for Ian
terms and &C abs. Buttons and glue
come from its hoofs. It's bones be-
come margarine or manure. In the
knife handle we use II, in leather, In
gold beater's skin, felt roofing; every
part of its internal economy is part OF
our external economy. and its fat Is
incandescent (or nop as tallow.-Fry's
Magazine.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
The Art of lndexing.

A Natal public library catalogue con"
tains entries as follows:
Lead, Kindly Light.
POISONING.
Almost as funny as the catalogue
which gave:
M,li-On the Human Understanding
On the Floss.
Publisher and Register.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
C,llirI a Skeptic.

V'ayback Senio The time | went to
see Rurnum's wo. IL famous white eie-
phant-
Wayback Junior Qnterrupti-s>-He
never had white elephant. dad. 1t
was fake.
Wayback Senior (brlstling up)-A
fake wuz It? Col durn We. s'pose ar
ter yc 90 to college fer another year er
two yell be tellin' me / never seen Il
real live mermaid in a tank Nv water!
Brooklyn Life.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Nth Thanks.

John Budd was a most sedate. pre-
else and altogether exemplary young
man. When he wooed and won Susan
Smiley. the belle of the village. every
body rejoiced at Johns good fortune
However. he bore his triumph with
modesty and decorum until the day or
the wedding. Then for one awful mo-
ment his air OF aplomb failed him.
When the officiating clergyman asked.
"Will you, John, take this woman TO
be thy welded wifew John respond
ed blushingiy, "Yes. please. ."-Harper's
Weekly.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10

Jimmy-I was walking In the woods
when all at once came Oh the biggest
kind Of rattlesnake. Pa-How DO
you know 1t was a rattlesnake. JIM
my? Jimmy-By the way my teetn
ratified as soon as ! saw him. Chicago
News.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1908-01-10
Hin Method.

~Your speech sounded fne," said the
s<tyntivo listener, "but, DO you know. l
can't remember half a dozen words
Of II"
That's good" answered Senator Sor-
sssun- The ART Of speschmaking con-
ststu n pleading the ar without fur
sishns anV dnta far subsequent CON
nedNHoa Ashlag gksa 2tAx.