Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1908-03-13
WAITING TO BE WON.
Nsture Fixes the Adaptation Of Pursuit
and the Pursued.

Esture Fixes the Adaptation Of Pursuit
and the Pursued.
1t Is not only unjust, ii is foolish, to
accuse women of hypocrisy and deceit
because when they are in love they
conceal. and even deny, the existence
of such feelings until, their lovers hav-
ing cOurted their favor and sued prop-
erly therefore. the time is ripe for the
open avOwal under circumstances be-
fitting their dignity and selfrespect.
Ihat a man may choose. but a woman
must wait to be chosen" Is an axiom
which must be duly taken into account
In all discussions of love and marri.
age "a fundamental principle which
custom and tradition forbid one to dis.
regard. If the woman who yields too
readily cheapens herself, what shall be
said of her who so far forgets herself.
as to come before she is called?
Throughout all nature. With bird
and beast as well as with the lower
forms of animal life. the female re-
treats and the male pursues. The
higher the degree of the ascending
scale the greater the cOyness displayed
by the coveted female. Even when
she is really willing to be won. she
feigns reluctance in order to enhance
her value in the eyes of the future
lord and master" The sentiment has
nothing to do with falsehood. and de-
ceives no one; it is simply the fami-
nine instinct. and as natural as breath
ing.
Even when openly sought. a woman
hesitates to admit to herself. much
less to her lover, that she reciprocates
his affection. She resents the power
OF the new element which has entered
her life; she objects to the confession
that she Is no longer law unto her.
self; she hesitates to surrender her.
self and her whole future into the
keeping of another-a feeling which
all women understand. and of which
men have no comprehension.
Love means much more to n woman.
in comparison, than it does to most
men. 1t means the alteration of her
whole life-the subsection of her will
to Il stronger; the cutting Off of old
ties; thorough uproOting and trans.
planting, in fact. and the wiser wo-
man is the more she hesitates, unless,
as often happens, she loses her head,
and has but one idea-love, only love.
Small wonder. then. that she strug.
giles against the new force. which is
subversive to the old order of things:
that her manner changes: that she Is
variable In her understanding one
moment, defiant the next-and treats
her unhappy lover in an April ashton,
sunshiny and chilly by turns, sort
| of "keep-yOu-distance" manner which
reduces him to condition of despair.
until some experienced friend enlight-
ems him as to the truth-that 1t Is
merely a woman's way of making her
| surrender and shielding her heart un-
til she Is sure that the hands held out
for 1t are strong and tender. "Only a
womans heart" but when once given
away. 1t Is forever and ever-to break,
to cast away. or to despise II the
recipient be unworthy. For a love
and a VOW and a heart may be
broken"
or course, 1t Is only when a woman's S
love Is genuine. that she has anything
to conceal; the deceit comes In when
she pretends to be in love and Is not,
which now and then chances. and Is
not to be excused.
If instinct teaches a woman to Weld
with apparent reluctance when ardent
ly wOoed by an acceptable suitor. how
much more does nature prompt her to
hide her love with jealous care when
1t has been bestowed unsought! 1t Is
an admirable theory that, no woman
shall fall in love until invited in un-
mistakable terms to do so; but unfor-
tunately the practice Is sometimes to
the contrary. Nor is a woman always
to blame that she falls In love un-
advisedly; so that If a woman asks
herself when she first began to care,
she often finds it difficult to answer
the question. Human love Is by no
means the growth of human will, and
women are not always at fault for
loving not wisely but too well.
There are men who pay court to
every attractive woman whom they
meet. They are fascinating without
effort, and their pennies are so bright
that the recipients often mistake them
! for gold. and give far more than cor