The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1908-12-04
a VERY BUSY DAY in THE
OFFICE OF 1.-THE OUTBREAK"

And / desire TO inform You that, DUR
ing the last is years at least. you weroi
never once within hai(ing distance of the,
EXTREMIST ou,posts of The truth, Yours;
truly"
To whom s:,aN ] ADDRESS this letter."
asked the stenoGrapher, arising to depart.
OH. to any one" replied the editor. IA,
scarcely matters
The stenographer retired. addressing the;
letter 10 Ernest Seton-Thompson. No. mott
Thompson-SeIon; this is 1910. and he has.
changed his name again.
Again the great editor was by himself
oblivious To his surroundings. About him.
on all four of the walls, hung revised,
copies OF The Outbreaks rules. as follows:
Rules for Outbreak Staff.
The lumeh hour is suspended until fur,
ther notice.
Employees desiring 10 go home any even-!,
ing are required TO give the editor two,
weeks notice of their ridiculous intention.
Stenographers who can take dictation
only at the rate OF 3A words n minute WILL
kindly brush up their speed on look for
new jobs.
Employees will mind their OWL business,
only when the other fellows permits them
to DO so.
Never walk around "a desk OF railing;
vault.
i.cunonlber 10 put into Whatever YOU
write:
l. Ginger.
: V Vim'
s. Grammar df compatible with other
iugredients).
For sunmoning Office boys use a pistol,
with blank cartridge. il the first sum
mons is UNDECIDED, use ball cartridges.
Amy office boy found standing, sitting,
reclining or lying down. will be Immediate
ly fired.
office boys must Invariably wenr rnn-i
ming togs and spiked shoes and keep
themselves in an alert, crouching posture.
ready TO leap forward at the crack of thes
pistol.
Any employee found doing only one thing,
at a time will be snmnarily discharged.
There was a new Interruption, and again,
the gray-bearded associate editor with the
high forehead stood in the precinct. The!
editor had touched a button. :.
"Your commands, sir?" asked the asso-i
ciate editor. =
''Oh, yes said the editor, adding thei
finishing touches 10 an essay on "Cultura'
D in the Upper Mile Region" Did yon.
3 write that 5,0OO-word article ] asked from
YOU Is minutes ago on Race Suicide, the
G Country's Peril?''
j Il did" was the detected reply. Here
. are the revised proofs
well, destroy Them said the EDITOR,
. who was half way through a paper on
b Dancing in the Middle Ages. II have n
better IDEA. Zen thoNsitilsA "olus' p'S'"'''
& on Race Suicide, the scountry's Saliva
q ton"
q With a low moan The associate editor
withdrew. Left to himself, the editor
plunged with Il scowl into the real work or
q the day. For half all hour he wrote with
II both hands. rive minutes after his labors
n were completed he called for proofs ana
got them. With his brow corrugated in a
deep frown, he ran hastily over the copy,
IL ever and anon and sometimes oftencr re-
peating phases:
said meticulous minds. 'Prcdac1ous oil
l factories'-l wrote predatory malefactors
Is Reprehensibla and indefensible crarerls
and carniverous and avid reactiOnaries-
he that's all right. PrepOsterous and glut.
>e tenacious hirelings-Nes. ] wrote that
I'd Aboninably tenacious and hideously for
Mt midable-flne.'
nc And hastily changing the title of his
main article to The Inherent NiciouSness
- and Diabolically Gnregencrate Detesta-
bility OF the Crimina Rich he called the
e. foreman and gave him Instructions about
the nakc-up of the colored supplement
a. which was to be issued with the next is
sue, containing the first iDstallmcnt OF the
s. WiencrsclnitZel Kids and Buster Jones
Then he went out to lunch. AS he did 81
is the raucons voices of newsboys broke the
surrounding stiffness.
H. "Wuxtree Outbreak! Wuxtree Out
te break. An about the Criminal rich
", Thrilling Race Suicide!!'
ne AZ, me- said the sray-beardcd assist
lis ant editor. watching him go. THE ont
break isn't what 1t used to be-"
1T amt, hey?" said the forenan. :.
a guess you haven't talked to the bushes
mnnagsr."