Willmar tribune., 1908-12-30
A BEAR STORY AND OTHER TALES

A busy place like the Tribune
office sees many visitors during the
course of the average day. Most
of these are business calls, relating
to subscriptions. advertising or the
good printing turned out in the job
departmen Occasionally the-per-
neutrality-suspicious. calls to see
the fighting editor, or the-man-
with-the-proud-smiIe of paternity
or the new'y-wed in his new black
suit call to make generous offer
ing to the >mokiog editor. The
just-arrived-in-lhe. city is another
class that usually comes to the news
paper Office to get the information
they need. But the who-en-
joys-a-good-story is a visitor who
is especially welcome as one who
helps to drive dull care away and
put silver lining of humor to the
hurrying clouds Of work and worry
that pass continually thru the sane
tun4 of the live newspaper.
He came the other day. The
merry twinkle in his eye told US he
had something good to pass on.
With assumed gravity he inquired
if we were prepared to hear the
tale of bloody encounter which
has not been surpassed in local his
tory since the battle of Mr.. Noun
tain's bear with the e. tire dog pop
uIation Of the city. With eager
ness we bade him proceed. "Ihen
listen," said he. "A day or so be-
fore the late doings in the Guild
hall, the committee Of ladies, all
prominent in social cilcles, met
there to make the preliminary ar
rangements 'or the feast. Scorning
all notions of what was b,coming
to patrician ladies Of their station
in life, they proceeded to the meni-
al tasks Of manipulating brooms,
dust-rags. scruDbing brushes. ct
cetera, in the enthu> iastic fashion
usually adopted by those who work
by choice rather than from any
stern demands from mother necess-
ity. Little they dreamed what was
in store for them. During the in
terim since the hall as last treated
to domestic revolution. a cer tain
party had made Investigations and
concluded that the hall would make
an ideal nome for himself and post
Gritty. He accordingly took possess
sion, brought his wi e, and as a
loy,l citizen, hearing Of the tre-
mendous endorsement at the polls
by the people of the Rooseveltian
policies. soon had a promising fam
lily of ten gathered about the
hearthstone. Unfortunately, Fate
took no cognizance of their patri-
otic endeavors, for their home life
was presently most cruelty ended.
Alas! they were to fall victims to
the irreconcilable conflict the mex
orable law Of, nature the survival
of the fittest. But Mr.. Mus Mus
culus, for that was his name, did
not give up possession of his home
without struggle. When the in
dustrious ladies laid bare the happy
home, the twelve members of the
Mus colony made a grand stimuli
taneous rush. The first advantage
was entirely with the colonials, for
such is the fear that unconsciously
envelOps the mind of the feminine
Of the genus homo when confronted
with desperate rush of the genus
Mus, that they Immediately flee for
refuge to the highest available
points of safety. Thus, in spite of
their thousandfo'd superiority in
strength, the ladies presently found
themselves standing aghast on top
of the table, chairs and other ar
ticles, brandishing their imple-
ments Of domestic endeavor, while
the Mus colonists had found tenn
porarv cover in divers crooks ano
crannies. Prudence demanded that
in the face of such giant enemies,
the only ssfety for the colonials lay
in instant flight, and the moment
ary advantage gained by the first
surprise was anticalIy employed
in finding mode of egress from
the building. Only two of the
whole number reached safety.
Presently the war of determination
began. No quarter was given,
One after the other the rodents
were discovered. pummeled and
beaten into pulp, staining the
floor with their life blood. Fina Iy
ten tiny corpses lay still and shape
less, while the triumphant ladies',
with the flush Of victory on heir
cheeks, talked all at the same time.
making claims as to who had done
the most execution. Finally every
member was pledged to secrecy
about the bloody affair. By chance
l learned the details Of the story
and made the resolve that such
glory should not remain buried in
oblivion.
That's good story" says we,
How I" Decorate the Turkey.