New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1908-12-06
SOUP AND STORY,
WINE AND WIT
BANQUET SEASON IN FULL
SWING.
Roast and Repartee, Perfecto and
Pun Soothe Stuffed Stomdchs
While Bonmots Bubble.

Htzsw haw hsw, Hear heart Gem
tIe-neu the President OF the United States.
Il is an honor to address you. my fellow Mace
domains Frienos and brother switzsrs
Rarely has it been my privilege. :
While seeing the glitter OF this festive board
That reminds OF story.
The banquet season 10 on. and these are the
hoary vocables waited out Of the eating halls OF
many New York hotels. while the fragrance OK
perfectos and the odor Of costly food ascend
20 the ladies' gallery and what s-hts- names MAJ
terpieoe on the ceiling. Redfaced gentemen' N
clawhamrer and white tie. have played ansconoe
with SO worth OF refreshments. including eavia''
orsters soup, fish mutton. terrapin, partridge,
nate vegetables dessert and 6 quart Of various
LIQUORS Every vacancy is filed IN the corporeal
man II remains only 70 utiilate the spiritual
r,sIste with oratory. The after dinner speaker Do
q imperative necessity: he LIFTS the burden OF
Indigestion with laughter He is almost equal TO .
r,eustn tablet In the degenerate days Of Rome
dancing girls waltzed between the divans OF recurr-
bent banqueters. and there were other less as
ghetto devices TO overcome the effects OF gorge
Civilization invented the after dinner speaker.
who might properly be licensed by the Board sf
Health
After the trusts have been reformed. the BAN
Duets must be looked into and regulated This Is
The consensus OF opinion among authorities Ths
common people scarcely realize the evils that have
grown I'D IN connection with banquets II the
frst place their number has vastly multiplied
The banquet habit has spread until the cstser OK
dishes and toastraasters almost browns out the
music Of tsxicabs in the fashionable districts
Every night from November to the end or FEB
ruarv some little society has big feed Secondly.
IL is charged there has developed monotony In
food and In speeches The menu is nearly always
the same and SO are the orators. person can
get better action with his money by having prt-
vate dinner IN hotel and topping on at the the
sire He only misses references 70 his patriotisrn
and intelligence
It Is sheer luck when e new star rises on the
BANQUET horizon and makes few original remarks
The big guns in business and politics are hard to
get and when you get them they are not always
good substitutes for pepsin- Besides. large man
usually expects large fee in addition TO his trav-
cling expenses 1t is only question OF time when
banquet speakers will become professionals and
hire out for 60 much night and dollars extra for
every laugh raised beyond the specifications
GOVERNOR HUGHES Is CHARY.
Governor Hughes has received and declined most
Of seyentv-two Invitations TO speak at bSnqueu
before the first Of the year. II is estimated
that if President Roosevelt accepted al his IN
vitations he would be speaking into the twenty
FIRST century Mr.. Taft could be booked solid
every night for the next four years. There are
not enough Presidents and exceptional Governors
70 20 around When the scarce and grave notaoles
are eliminated New York can muster but half a
dozen laugh raisers and OF these ind It more
profta BILE TO write out their remarks and sell them
as literature drama.
Since food is The more important part Of the