davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

use them for blowing up roots and tear
ing down trees and also for fighting
their enemies
The average tusk is strong and elias
tic; but ii can be broken and the ends
are sometimes snapped off. Ivory tusks
are always sold by weight, and the
traders tell me that in buying them
of the natives they have to be careful
to see that pieces of iron or BITS OF
stone have not been driven into the
hollows Of the horns to make them
weigh more.
Many of you have been II the hands
of dentist and have seen how he al
most breaks your Jaw In pulling a
moIar with long root. The tusks are
really elephants teeth and it Is diff
cult to get them out of a dead elephant
They are fitted into a bony socket AID
the roots 90 almost UP TO the eyes
4 tusE eight feet long may have two
feet of its roots imbedded In the skull
and If it is taken away at once the
head has to be chopped to pieces tc
get ii cut
In addition to the tusks, the elephant
has six great teeth inside its mouth
on each side Its jaw above and below
and these are almost as firmly imbed
ded as the tusks themselves
The tusks are hollow about half way
UP. The smallest forms a big load FOL
man. while one weighing $50 pounds
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

Deep underneath the strawberry beds
lie famous treasures. When the Or
sinls owned the castle they dug up an
tique goblets and other treasures val
ued at 100000. But the list Of the
jeweled plate still exists, and it is
known that not little Of these have
been found. Still lying hidden there
is famous emerald cup the goblet
fashioned from one great stone.
In the lake, half imbedded In the
mud. lie the two celebrated villa boats
OF Tiberius and Caiigula, boats which
contained hanging gardens, temples OF
marble, columns Of porphyry, roofs Of
cedar. ornaments innumerable of
bronze. The boats are still intact, and
Education Minister Rava has appointed
a committee Of inquiry on which are
Boni, the famous archaeologist, and
Carrado Riccl. These gentlemen have
come to the conclusion that two courses
are open to the government, one TO
lower the lake till the level OF the wa
ter touches the submerged boats, the
other to drain the lake dry.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
ELEPHANTS TUSKs.
Some of Them Are Nine Feet Long
and Weigh 200 Pounds.

"hu y" elG soV AouhuS.
SiXty-tive thousand elephants were
killed in Africa last year AID more
than million and a half pounds Of
ivory were taken from them and
shipped Off TO Europe, writes Frank G.
Carpenter OF this fully third
came from Zanzibar, another third was
from Portuguese East and West Africa,
and large part of the balance was
from the valley Of the Congo.
Cape Colony furnished hundred
thousand pounds, Egypt 100000 pounds,
and large part came from the Niger
territories and Lagos.
African ivory brings the highest
prices in the markets. 1t is superior
to any other In the size Of the tusks.
l have seen some which are nine feet
long, and there are some which weigh
as much as 200 pounds each. The
average weight of tusk is much less
than this and one of a hundred pounds
is quite valuable.
In India the average tusk does not
weigh fifty pounds, but that of the
African elephant is much heavier. Many
OF the tusks are broken when they are
brought into the market. The elephants
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
GIVE BACK THE RIVERS.
Once They Were Thoroughbred and
They should lie Made So Again.

In early days our rivers were thor
oughfares, says the World To-day
They continued to be thoroughfares un.
til the middle of the last century. Now
they are used mostly for sewerage and
drinking wafer
Yet sooner or later nature knows
that human nature will come to its
senses. 1t takes no great genius to dis
cover that the Ohio, Tennessee. Illinois,
Mississippi, Missouri and the Arkansas
might very easily be Joined by the
canals Of the great lakes. They are
raw material ready for a transporta
ton system which will make the Nile
look like strip of lltmus paper.
The rivers themselves seem anxious
to work. Not having farm products 10
transport they are Transporting farms
There is a good deal of agricultural
land of Missouri and Illinois, not TO
n ntion half a dozen other states, to be
seen in the Gulf Of Mexico. Dig up n
few sand bars build few levees, and
blow UP few dams, and the rivers will
be sobered Then the region between
the Allcghanles and the Rockies. the
Gulf of Mexico and the north pole can
get its goods to market without worry
ing about he shortage OF freight cars.
If it is for the interest Of the country
that we should have harbors on the
Pacific and Atlantic, II Is just as neces-
sary that there should be wharves and
light houses and fourtccn-foot channels
on the big rivers.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
Bodies Are Found.
Engaged to Companion.
LONG WIRELESS TALKS,
Battleship Keeps in Communication with
Honolulu and Vessels Over 1000
Miles Away.

on BOARD L. S. S. CONNECTl-
CUT by wireless, July 25.-lhe posi-
ton Of the fleet ut 5 p. III. Friday was
Isl degrees & minutes, west longitude;
Is degrees and % minutes north lati-
tude at distance of 80 miles from
Honolulu. The weather is warm with
a moderate sea running and occasional
wind squalls
During the morning and again in the
afternoon the fleet went through various
tactical exercises, the day being other.
wise uneventful.
The flagship last night received re-
ports from the Glacier by wireless, The
Glacier was then 1850 miles distant
from the Connecticut toward Sueya.
Wireless messages were also exchanged
with the Iankton, 1907 miles distant
in the direction of Samoa.
The fleet will be in communication
with ports where cable stations are 10
Gated probably every night during the
voyage to Auckland except July y
to 80,
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

is to whom falls in greater part the training of
the population in the of beauty and in appreciation
of the worth Of beauty
Who keeps the flowers blooming in the average house
lot? Who fills the southern window with plants in
tin and broken pieces Of crockery? Who engages
the florist to keep the rich house filled with flowers
through all the seasons2 For whom the beautiful OBJ
ecs in the rich home produced and forth? Always
by and for the Who teaches the little children
to enjoy the beauties of and Of art? Always
almost always the woman
look forward, therefore to the future Of the higher
education for great influence in the perfect
ing OF family life civic e Of household Joy and good
--IIarper's Bazaar.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
TO DRAIN TREASURE LAKE.
Georgia Womnn's Husband Owns
Waters Hiding Boats of Caesars.

Few Americans who come to Italy
fail to see the famous Lake Of Menu,
the Mirror of Diana" as the ancientS
called it, says the Rome correspondent
of the New York World. The splendid
castle mirrored in its waters, once the
property Of the Colonnas. then the
Frangipanis, the Cencis and the Or
SIMS, is now owned by Don Enrico Rus
poll, the second husband of an Ameri-
can woman, whom he married in Wash
ington six years years ago, Mrs. Bru-
tons, whose maiden name was Eugenia
Berry, and whose girlhood home was
at Oak Hi. Ga.
On the borders of the lake, where
now the strawberry beds cover the
ruins, stood a temple OF Diana, once
renowned for magniicence. 1t was pre-
sided over by priest, whose sole quail
fication was that he killed his predeces-
sor and always carried sword In his
hand to prevent being served likewise
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
KILLED BY LIGHTNING,
Bolt Strikes a Farmhouse and One Child
Is Dead While Six Are Badly
Injured.

YORK. Pa, July 25.-IEhtning struck
the house Of Peter kp--."r, farmer,
residing near jefferson Borough, last
night, and killed Charles kcssler, aged
II years, aud injured M. and Mrs
Kcssler and four other Children. A ket-
tie Of boiling water ou stove was
overturned by the lightning and the
scalding water poured over a 4year-old
child. The child is in critical condi-
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
On Wild Goose Chase for Sister,

BELOlT. Wis, July IA Special. /
Chief of Police Scheibcl early this morn
ing received Il post card signed with the
initial ID" from Kansasvillc, Wis, just
east of Burlington, saying there was
Miss Rabbit at Lawns hotel there
The chief notified Arthur Rabbit.
brother of the insane girl who is being
sought for in Indiana, and he left ut
once for KansaSyille. On his arrival
there he wired Chief Scheib"l that the
Miss Babbtt there, was not his sister.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
TEDIOUS TASK IS DONE.
Frank Lakas, Marshfeld, Covers Walls
and Ceiling of Room with Cigar
Bands.

MARSUFIELD, Wis, July "a
Especial. AFTER fifteen months work.
Frank Lakas, night clerk at the BodeEa
hotel has completed the task of covering
the walls and ceiling of his bedroom
with cigar bands. The room measures
?xl4xs. The task was accomplished
during Lakas' spare moments. and he
figures that six weeks of actual work
was spent on it. The decoration scheme
is arranged rs rosettc, and is artistic
ally designed
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
Rnkinr Tn the Past,

SAY, Borroughs," said Markley,
''how about that $40 you've owed me
since last year,?
"Oh. come, old man," said Borroughs,
why can't you let bygones be by
cones T-Philadelp Press.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
ROBBERS TAKE JEWELS.
Blow Open Safe in New York and Sc
cure About $4,000 Worth of
the Gems.

NEW YORK, July 25,-Robbers Sc
cured about $1,000 worth Of jewery,
diamonds and gold by flowing open
with dynamite the safe Of Thomas j..
Dunn x Co, in Chambers street, early
today. Tools and Il rope ladder, by
which the robbers climbed to the roof,
entering the building through scuttle,
were left behind.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
VAN RENSSELAER, IS OUT
Young Man Charged with Threatening
Mother Dismissed from Hos
ptal as Sane.

NEW YORK. July 2J.-John A. Van
Rensselaer,, we'll known in Newport and
Philadelphia, who was arrested Monday,
charged with sending a threatening let
ter to his mother, was arraigned today
ana parolel in the custody of his counsel.
Van Rensselaer, was in Bellevue hospital
several days under observation rs to his
sanity, but he was DISCHARGED as sane.
Counsel was directed to produce Van
Rensselaer, in court Tuesday in order to
ascertain if the young mans mother
desires to press the charge,
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

organism environment tina oh responds per-
fectly the other his pitifu battles .or existence will
come to an end Wealth will abound. Trivial toll will
supply all the gentle uXures he needs and his superb
mental spiritual forces will be at leisure to en-
gage those exercises which their proper and
worthy employment
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
Villas IS MUCH BETTER.
Is Conscious Enough TO Answer Ques-
lions Put 10 Him by Physi-
clans.

MADISON, Wis, July 25,-LSpecial.l
Col. William H. Villas condition was
somewhat improved today. In answer TO
several questions he WAS conscious
enough to say yes or mo. DIR. Philip
Fox the attending physician looks for a
continual Improvement
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
WOMEN AND COLLEGE EDUCATION.
BY President Eliot of Harvard

The main object of the higher ed
ucation Of women has not been kept
sufficiently In view. OF course, there
are other objects, plenty of them
training for the professions; train
Ing for all the varieties of work
that women are now engaging in ;
training for all that enjoyment and
usefulness that come with knowl-
edge of the fine arts, and with APP
probation of the artistic spirit, and
Of what the artistic spirit can do
for the activities Of q nation. 1t
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

East Penn Junction. Pa. in proud nt the
return Of a tine growth Of hair over his
head, which has long been a. shiny as a
billiard bali. Recently he was severely
skin had peeled of MIR kimmrtt was
surprised IT, hud that hair was AGAIN
SproutIug GA the BIZ bare spot. lie at
tributes II To- suburb
Mis-, Marion Sheridan Of Bayport. y,
y. as the result Of excessive bathing,
dreamed she was aGalu diving OIL the
shore dock, aud in uer Steep dove head
foremost out of the second story bedroom
window. She was picked up uucuu-
scious, with a broken nose.
Willis Pratt. a farmer living near
EarmerShurg, lud.. is S-J.tH rrher
than h" was a few days ago owing To an
invention which he pictured in dream.
Some time ago Pratt dreamed tire"
NIGHTS in succession about the Cou-truc-
tiun of an improved churn, and he st
To- work aud modelled one after the on"
pictured in hl~ dreams. ~ soon a. the
model was completed he obtained pat
uut Last week churu company OF en-
cago asked Pratt to place a price ON his
invention, which hr did, putting til" III,
IRE So high that hv had little hope ul
the company accepting the price. on
trary to his expectations. he received a
reply that the company would accept lh'
offer.
Miss Alice Z. S,Lwab of Oakland.
Cal, is corgratulatlnG herself because
she put faith in a drram, The gir,
dreamed that sh" would he held mp ana
robbed of her jewei-, aud when ~"
went riding the urNt morning SHE gave
her mother all her rings. She had not
gone far ont of town when she was hrId
UP by a hghwaymau riding bicycle.
She had diamond brooch with her
and was forced To give it up. The jew-
os that she gave her mother were val.
ucd ut 5000
Chasing woodchucIi under a barn, a
man ou the farm of Jud~uu l'uruou,
near WiNom, Mich, brought to light SluO
worth Of burglars plumber, jrwelry and
other articles, Tie plumber IL about half
Of that taken from general stores m
| Whom ana Milford in May. The farm
barn about half q mile back ou tn" Fur
mon p,uCe to uncover the wuodchucl,,
when hr brought a S&tchrl To- light. lie
~ once cullod In the county officers. Tie
woodchuck got away.
Two colarcI men broke jail Mt Woods
TOWN. y. j., aul then hunted up tm-
~rabl. IIrl,wortb. Who bad arrested
them tvs, huurs before. and d,mludod
their valuable~. including 81 ju cash.
Whr,l Ttr constable, according tu GUS
tom, HAD taken from thrm when ar.
rr>'cG, THE constable was dumiuuudcd
'y the nerve of the two mcH. bur hr
ju~t mo- time i'm hu~lIug them back ~
JAIL lhn prisoners HAD mad" thr,r c~-
cape by working ~oHu bricks Irusr
around the door Another prisoner. 70
white man had also madr his escape.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
Self Satisfied.

Look at the self satisfied dub. Now
what commendable trait does he DOS
sess?'
We'll. that Of being easily pleased :"
Louisville Courier Journal.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

requires four porters to carry 1t. Such
men are paid from three to FIVE cents
day for their labor so that the cost
Of transportation is not heavy.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
Villas SHOWS IMPROVEMENT.

Doctors Have Slight Hope for Pa
tent.
MADISON. Wis, July Special !
The condition of Col William +. Villas
is better today.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
AUTO DASHES INTO
CANAL; 2 DROWN
ROCHESTER MAN MISTAKES ALLEY
FOR ROAD AND PLUNGES
INTO WATER.
WAS DRIVING AT FULL SPEED,
He Had Been Riding with Fiancee and
Both Meet Death at Same
Time.
TIRED TO TURN THE MACHINE

ROCHESTER,, y. V, July Odd
ward 5. Bartlett, president of the The
bert Gas company of this city, accom-
panied by Miss Geraldine Humility,
daughter of wealthy family here, and
driving new automobile, mstook an
alley for main thoroughtare AMI drove
at full speed into the Erie canal early
today.
Bodies Are Found.
The bodies of Miss Tumity ana Bart
lett were recovered several hours later.
The wheel tracks on the bank of the
tow path indicated that just aS the wa
ter was reached the driver saw his mis-
take and tried to turn aside.
Engaged to Companion.
The impetus of the heavy machine
was too great, however, and the auto
mobile plunged into the canal Bartlett
was IS years old, and it is said he WAS
engaged to Miss Humility.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

the burlesaue Hebrew and the impossible freshman Of
vaudeville to welsustained, we'll play, and you
have found one who cannot discriminate between the
merits OF Raphaels Madonna" and the "Newlyweds"
and Happy Hoollgan" OF the Sunday supplement.
We cannot blame them, but we can educate them.
Rerin at the begnningin the home in the schooroom
give the men and Of the future start in the right
objectionable result will follow
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

is vulgar thus to do violence to ones taste to ones deli
cacy elegance, 1t Is vulgar to solace with soft
instead Of expressing ourselves with art and
beauty 1t is vulgar souls by denying them
they require to chain them to earth when they
winged fly heaven. For piteous povertys de
formities of body her ravages the life Of the
are sadder. BY usness and squaor the heart is bru-
tailed. the soul Scared Millions Of and
are crippled sulted, diseased Of mind and morals by
reason Of their beSgary.
Less idle as the world Is ordered. the conso-
lations Of philosophy and religion There lot
ever and paltry but yields Enthusiastically lavish
compensation to an heroic heart And there is soul
so mean buds and flowers in beauty peculiar
to itself Its env,rons they will When the civilized
man so attunes his life to his surroundings har-
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

O = OC0
apart ou tile tahlr. Judge Stephen, was
sufficiently curious t. ask what il was
THAT, subj" replied NewsDmc, is
witch powder which friends of NAH
client in the south have purchased by
subscription aud sent To- him. Il is
calculated. sub, to di~pei powers Of evil
and % bring good fortune ON the pos
Syo~uh.'
What are YOU going to d3 with it,
asked the judge.
II propose, sub. to sprinkle this yeah
cn'roum and thereby bring luck 10 nah
client
Then the ease proceeded, but New,ome
became 80 much absorbed In hl, sum
ming NJ tIat he forgot To- Use th" low
der aui IN" jury brought .n verdict
of guilty. II" was much distressed 10y
ms negligence.
\ few days ago dispatch from 60.
lumhus O.. told Of a mysterious stranger
who has been sending money ian letters
t. John Gattury "a b.aCk,mth for TWEEN
~ years. oliver On-. an engineer is
having much the same experience as
tatiucy. some tim" ago Ou- received Il
letter in which was lucIu~ri II - bill
Wrapped around the hill was "a piece IF
paper ou which picture of a cigar
had been drawn. Upon tie picture were
the words: Have one On me-" y little
later another letter came with nothing IN
the envelope but ~ in bills Stll later
came another envelope containing two 50
bills. Mr. Ong j. now expecting and
hopes tue amount will keep on increasing
with each letter The letters have All
been poStmarked Newark, y. j., aud Mr..
ong has not the slightest idea who sent
the money.
Moths caterpinars AMI other like
pests have made their appearance IN
great numbers IN many sections of the
province of -. Johns y Il. partiCu-
larry in York county They have caused
! considerable Inconvenience. and several
amazing stories are told of experiences
when they have been mot in large
bodies. Traiumen manning a freight be
tween Fredericton Junction aud Ne
Adams are authority for Il statement
that appears Incredible Fhcy say that
the heavy freight train was stopped
three times within mile 10y cIterpN-
lars which SwHrmrd over the tracks iu
such numbers is 10 ettecuaNy impede
the progress of the train. II was nee
eS~ary 10 arm the entire train crow
with shovcI| and scoop the thousands Of
posts off the tracks. and smother those
On the rnadbrd by -uovcug gravel over
them. They report every trnr nud hit
Of shrub along the line rs being druudod
of foliage
by the viii Of Brujamiu I.apJlo~, 'ilcd
m TIA, probate court ~: >ov Haven.
Conn, nine graud,ou~ and grauddau-htrr-
/ viii get 500 each on their wedding day,
/ providing they marry persons of Jewish
faith and accurdu. IN the rites uf the
/ Jewish religion. Failure T., comply
/ causes any share To- hc equally divided
| later among those who de- a. stipulated.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
THE THEATER AND THE PUBLIC

AS is the character Of the community and
the age, so Is its theater. 1t cannot lead; 1t
must follow, for it reflects life and tendencies
the very age and body of the time" II the
public selects the trashy play or exposition on
which to lavish Its favor 1t Is because that
portion Of the public possesses cheap and
trashy minds and uncultured tastes.
Find the man who prefers the educated dogs
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
ADVANTAGES OF BEING RICH.
BY Ada May krecker.

If riches have worth at all 1t is in relieving
the mind Of thoughts Of money. 1t is in letting
soul and sense freely flower unimprisoned by
patry pennies. The ignominy OF poverty is
the barbarous necessity Of interpreting all ones
experience In terms Of dimes and dollars; Of
counting pennies over food. shelter, amuse
ments charities, everything; OF choosing evil
things for lack OF pennies to get the good. 1t
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

too easily led away by their immediate and objective
side of things and thus lose sight Of their inner mean
ing, mysterious and divine.
The beautiful the good and the true are harmonious
in nature and the glory OF art consists in making this
harmony apparent Left themselves the uncutivated
grasp only what strikes their senses they see
ma ture ugest and most lusory aspect 1t Is
the mission o! to make them feel the indwelling
beauty which, like truth, always has existed Art Is so
profoundly related to humanity that before knowing what
the art of tomorrow will be must know what Will be
its science and philosophy.
If art aim at spritualization Of thought one
may ask the for its existence The average
picture has no inspiration for Unimagnatlve and-
scape Is one of the leCtinate forms art but the i'm
aclnave landscape which suggests the cosmic beauty
with which the artists soul has communed enters truly
into the domain of art and gives no mere physical
impression, but mental vision of nature.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30
MISSION OF ART TO UPLIFT MAN.
By Jean DeiviIIe.

There perhaps never has been a period in
the history of man or In the annals of art
when nature was more beloved and more ap-
preciutively studied than by the poets and men
of science and artists of our own time. And
unuuestionably this has had a fruitful infu'
eIce in many ways upon the modern mind and
the sensibilties Of mankind as whole. But
we are too greatly fascinated by the visible,
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

Fountaiutown Ind came near meeting
death hl blood poisoning CAUSED hy one
II her teeth being filled with brass. 4
travelling dentist made a visit "a that
section Ut the county aud Mrs Farley,
who was suffering from one Of her teeth,
Ind INN trent. Il.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

MIS-. Maroon Sheridan Of Bayport y,
y. as the result of excessive bathing,
dreamed she was aGalu diving OIL the
shore dock, aud in Gler Steep dove head
foremost out Of the second story bedroom
window. She was picked UP uncon-
sCious. with a broken nose.
The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1908-07-30

When it comes To the unique in the
way Of pcnlc- one ucar Berwick Pa.
stands out brightly. Announced as the
second annual picnic OF the widows Of
Berwick forty well known widows.
ranging in ages from - to - years. rr.
spondcd. all living examples of the
trujsm that "twrre better To- have loved
aud lost than never 10 have loved ar
ALL" 80 great was the success OF tur
picnic that It was decided to hold it
again next year ut the same time and
place. No wiiowers are invited.