The Birmingham age-herald., 1908-07-19
IN THE DENTISTS CHAIR.

' The tortures of the Spanish inquisition
 are not entirely of the past. 1 The modern rack is the chair of the dental surgeon. The difference between | the chair of the Spanish dungeon and the dentists chair is mostly as to the unholstering.
 One goes to the daStist for an examina-
 ton or cleaning of the teeth. He may
 be ones best friend. In his torture
 chamber he is your dearest enemy.
 'Hah!" says the inquisitor. What
 have we here? Two filings. We must
 have another appointment. How would
 tomorrow, say o'clock, suit you?" It suits you-lilxe an invitation to be hanged
 You go from the presence of the den-
 tist a changed man. Your nerves are
 tangled like sweet bells out of tune. An
 ominous thing -"3 o'clock tomorrow looms ever on the horizon of your sub
 consciousness. That appointment runs
 like an undertone through all the hours between. You laugh at yourself. You philosophize No matter, the date is fixed.
 One climbs with a ghastly smile into
 the hateful padded chair Adjustment of
 the towel Is like putting the moose about
 the neck of the wretch who Is to be
 swung off.
 flrSI IS a SllgnL SKlrmlSn, a premOn1- ton of the real thing when the smiling
 villain picks brutally into the decayed
 spots with a picl1ax. And now he be-
 gins his murderous job-the grinding out
 of the holes. Ughi You cover and finch
 and grunt. He is hunting for and find
 ing the place where you live. And you are "at home"
 Afterward comes the hammering of the gold with sledge hammer. Ugh but this is a hard way to acquire riches. The
 rascal is forcing the metal on you. He
 has such a supreme regard for your finer feelings. Besides, you are on the de- fensive. It really isn't fair to hammer man when he Is down. There! It is all over-but the polish ing.
 That process seems the worst of all be- cause 1t comes on the top of your two hours of human grief It looks a surplus bling on of pain. He is so careless with his wheel in the vicinity of sore and man gled gums With ones nerves taut as fiddle strings why can't the man be more careful?
 Finally the apathy ceases. As you rise from the chair your first impulse is to paste the dentist one over his left eye, but you remember, Faith ful are the wounds of a friend" You touch the gilded places with your tongue. You feel whole man again. There are
 no surplus holes in your headpiece and
 1t may be year before other filings are
 needed.
 What is the moral? If any it is on the surface, a gob of optimism-namely, this is a good world to live in, after all. You laugh thous- and times where you groan but once.
 THE STATUE OF A REAL MAN. A notable statue was presented a few
 days ago to the University of Nevada by Clarence I. Mackay. 1 It was the statue of his father, the founder of the Mackay fortunes. | The statue is the conception of a fine
 idea. The likeness of the first Mackay | is shown as he appeared in the days
 when he laid the foundation of his early i fortunes as miner. l There 1t stands-a young man of sturdy bearing He wears flannel shirt, open at the neck. Corduroy trousers are
 stuffed into cowhide boots On the head is a slouch hat. A miners pick Is clnched in one hand. A statue of the multimillionaire as he appeared in later life would have