davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
HAPPY PARENTS.
(Fron judge

Herbert, dear" said the fond
mother, "Willie Jones says that YOU
told him 10 throw the rock that
broke the window of the church,
Willie Jones is deliberate, UNI
qualified, pulverized, desquamated,
slew-footed, gander shanked, pie
faced, mutt-headed, lop-eared, blank
ety-blanked, wall-eyed falsfire!" re-
marked Herbert dear, looking up
from his play for moment.
With rapt smile the mother
beams upon the caller.
His papa is sure that Herbert has
future OF great distinction, and
may even be'-But just then the
cook called and the sentence was
not finished.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28

twenty two indictments, charging
him with falsifying accounts, grand
larceny and false statements, and his
shortage Is beyond $500. 900. The
piccaninny's shortage was thirty six
cents, and he cooked no books and
told no lies. A barouche in waiting
took the cashier TO Jail, and in the
States prison he will be given a soft
snap. The tiny Niger tramped be-
hind Il cop to his cell and will cut
leather and be we'll strapped for any
diSobcdience to rules.
These two cases set us musing. We
have turned the leaves of history to
see if we lived in 1908, A. D., or in
1908, b. G. We really fancied our
selves transported on some magic
carpet To China until we recalled the
Confucian doctrine of justice alike TO
high and low. We are indeed in
Christian Virginia, with Christ left
out. We praise Him on the harp and
sounding horns in vaultcd temples
and disregard His plain reminder
that God is no reSpecter of persons.
We scout that fair play which is the
essence of the gospel and pour CON
tempt upon the plain mandates of
the Book. Verify, we, too, shall
have our reward.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
GA ASTORIA.
Bears the Hlhs Kind You Have Always Bought
signature Of &W2gzezM<
Spring Styles

The March number of the Woman's
Home Compnion is the Spring FASH
ION Number, and in it GraceMargaret
Gould, the fashion editor, has many
interesting paragraphs, among them
the following:
wolfe Will continue TO be one of
the fashionable materials throughout
the spring and summer. So popular
is ii that it is now looked upon as a
staple among fabrics.
There is one item in her wardrobe
that no woman ought to worry about
this year-that is, her blouses, her
shirt waists, as she Is apt to call
them. For no matter what her age or
her figure, she can readily find in the
new designs for blouses many models
eactly suited to her individual need.
If she wishes to add breadth to
her shoulders, she can make them SO
that she will look broad shouldered
and yet have the consciousness that
she is in the height of style, for
oroad shouldered effects are all the
vogue, sometimes produced by plaits
over the shoulders, and
then again by a scarf-like drapery
so arranged that it widens the
shoulder line. While if, on the
other hand, she has a fondness for
the long dropping shoulder, she can
find many designs that will carry
out this effect
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
DEAD AT s3-BAD CUT WITH
AN
Shrader. Va. Feb. "A.

Shrader, Va, Feb. "a.
Rev. j. ;. Meadows preached sever
al interesting sermons lat week at
the Christian Church.
Rev. J. NJ. Maiden will preach
i'm the Methodist church nj this place
next Sunday morning.
Mr.. William Nichols, age So, died
at the home of his son, William, on
last Thursday morning. The burial
services were conducted by Rev. Us.
Meadows ut Grassy Spur Church on
Friday afternoon.
j. T.. Mcclure, who has been very
Ill with typhoid fever, is now con-
Valescent.
w. i. Shrader is carrying his left
arm i'm swing, the effects Of IA fall
last week, ON the mountain near his
home.
Charles Dudley had the misfortune
to cut bad cash i'm his leg, just be-
low his knee, with an ax last week.
Mr.. II. III. Mcclure, of Adria, was
in the Cove last Saturday.
Mr.. J. +. Gillespie, of North Taze-
well, visited homefolks last Thursday
night.
Mr.. JAS. johnson, of Tazewell,
was guest at ID. w. Dudley's last
wednesday night
Z. q. Mcclure is now spending
sometime at home.
Miss Birdie Shrader, was the
guest of Miss Laura Shrader last
sunday.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Swanson and Rnea

The Harrisonburg Times asks the
IndeX-Appeal for its candid opinion
of Governor Swanson appointment
of Judge Rhea as a member of the
State corporation commission. Judge
Rhea is now under in vestigation, and
it is "A rule with the Index-Appeal to
treat every man as innocent until
proven guilty. We have no personal
knowledge of the truth or falsity of
the charges against Judge Rhea, but
we do know Governor Swanson, and
we have that faith in his judgment
and probity which makes us believe
that he would select no man for a
place on the state corporation COM
mission in whose capacity and char
acter he did not have i'm plicit con-
fidence. We have known no man in
public life who seemed To be cleaer
in his motives or higher in his pur-
poses than Governor Swanson. So far
as we have been able to observe, the
charges against Judge Rhea have
been inspired by partisan rancour
and enmity, and are based ON rumors
and hearsay statements. They have
already been the subject of investiga-
ton by a Republican. congressional
committee, and they were not sus-
tanned. In the face of that fact, is
1T fair to Judge Rhea or Governor
Swanson or To the people of Virginia,
to assume that Judge Rhea is guilty,
especially, in advance of the findings
of the Investigation which he is now
undergoing? Doubtless, Judge Rhea
is practical and aggressive politi-
clan, and has proved himself to be
terror TO the Republicans I'M the
but slice when did Re-
publicans of that section find a glass
house TO live in from which they
could throw stones at other peoples
without breaking their
own glasses? = Petersburg Index
Appeal 49,.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Does Ma Wish She Was Par

Il wish / had lot o. cash."
Sez pa, one winters night:
I'D go down South an stay while
Where days are warm and bright"
He set an watched the fire die
(Seemed lost i'm thoughtful daze, }
Till ma brought in some fresh pine
knots
An made cheerful blaze.
L wish l had million shares
O. stock i'm Standard Oil, "
SEE pa; II wouldn't do a thing"
Ma made the kettle boil,
An mixed hot biscuits, fried some
ham
An eggs (smeIt good, you betD
Fetched cheese an doughnuts, made
the tea,
Then pa-set down an ct.
L wish l was millionaire
SEE pa; Id have a snap"
Next, from the lounge, we heard a
snore:
Pa-at his evening nap!
Ma did the dishes, shook the cloth.
Brushed up, put things away,
An fed the cat, then started up
Her plans for baking day.
She washed an put some beans to
soak,
An set some bred TO rise;
Unstrung dried apples, soaked 'em,
too,
All ready for the pies;
She brought more wood, put out the
cat,
Then darned four pairs o. socks;
Pa woke, an seq, Its time for bed
Ma, have you wound both clocks?"
Mary f. *. Hutchinson i'm March
Woman Home Companion.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
A STRANGE PANIC

This is the strangest panic ever
heard of, was remarked the other
day, by laboring man who came
by the office on his way home from
the grocery store, with one or two
small packages of eatables ne had
just purchased. When asked to ex-
plain he said, in substance: Here
we are, no work TO do, everything
shut down, thousands of men out of
employment. The railroads idle, the
coke ovens dead, no building going
on and the country filled with peo-
pie hunting work, and yet-and here
rs tbe strange part-groceries, rents,
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28

Everything taken into the stomach
should be digeSted fully within a GER
tain time. When you feel that your
stomach Is not in good oIder, that the
food you have eaten is not bieng di-
gested, take good, natural digestant
that will do the work the digestive
juices are not doing. The best remedy
Known today for al stomach troubles
is kodol, which is guaranteed TO give
prompt relief. II is Il natural digest
ant; ii digests what you eat, it is
pleasant TO take and is sold here by
Jackson.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
DIR. Kings New IifePiETs
The best i'm the world.
FAIRBANKS CANDIDACY

The fact that Senator Fairbanks
has the solid delegation from In
diana To the National Convention. i
perhaps, the most remarkable fact
In the history of Indiana Republican
politics. That a man who has scarce
ly a follower among the voters Of his
party in the state should capture the
solid delegation reveals power i'm
the state machine that was little sus-
pecied. Fairbanks presents the strange
spectacle of man running for nm
office when his political opponents
wish him success ut least in the
nomination, and the politicians of
his party wish his defeat, and vet
give grudging support. We have
failed To hear Republican voter
declare that he is in favor of the lev
senator, and yet he has the delegation
from Indiana. He can not carry the
vote of even his own city. He is ac-
cused of being the richest man in
indianapolis, and of never having
contributed TO any good cause. He is
down and out of the affections of his
own church and his party-but he
has the solid delegation from Indi-
ana 1t is Il strange condition of
affairs. Star and Democrat, Green
castle, Ind.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
The Blind Goddess Dead.
Evening Journal)


y negro lad in Portsmouth, illiterate
and presumably friendless, raised an
order from fifteen cents To ffty-one
cents and goes 10 the pentientiary for
two years. This is an infamous. mer-
cilesS, barbaric, punishment for a
baSatelle for which the limb of 4
birch we'll applied ut the appointed
place would not only be amply cor
rective, but save the State of heavy
cost, and, perhaps, save the child.
too, To useful citizenship. We do not
crIticiSe the court; we denounce rs
shameless the criminal law of Vir-
ginia which thus commits an Outrage
on humanity and flouts common
sense. That STRIPPING must for two
y ) associate with hardened
wretches for practically stealing
thirty-siX cents is but shade better
than the hanging in England, under
her criminal laws of the past. for
small forgery. 1t is something abhor-
red of gods and men. Governor Swan
son should look into this case. The
good name of Virginia is involved.
AT the same time and place the
tragedy of the little negro was enact
eel bigger play was attracting the
public mind. Butt, the defauIting
cashier of the Peoples Bank, was
charged under indictment with re-
ceiNlng funds, knowing the bank TO
be insolvent, and foT classifying ac-
counts, and pleaded guilty. The
commemorative Attorney asked the
Judge TO impose the minimum SEN
tence OF Imprisonment and the maxi
mum fine, so the culprit received
three years in the penitentiary and
was fined 81, 1874. The fine is an ami
able pleasantly, as the man is utter
Iy lnsolvent. This trusted officer, who
must be intelligent and high in So
cIal and business circles, rests under
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
A Few Horse Donts.

l. Don't use cod bits in cold
weather. Your horses tongue is tend
er, and his mouth is formed of deli
cate glands and tissues.
B. Don't fail TO blanket your horse
when he stands in the cold.
4. Don't forget that nasal catarrh,
diphtheria, bronchitis, and otherilI
often result from exposure and the
chill which follows suddenly checked
Precipitation.
D. Don't fail to keep your horses
shoes sharp when the streets are slip
perry.
=. Don't put your horses feet in
unskllled hands. Good feet are spoil
ed by bad shooting.
Z. Don't keep your horse in an
over-heated stable, then stand him
for hours in a freezing atmosphere.
and wonder why he became paraIyz-
ed.
8. Don't fail to water your horse
the first thing in the morning, but
not with ice water.
.. Don't load your horse too heavi-
ly when the streets and roads are
blocked with snow.
10. Don't force him to back a
heavy load over heavy snowbank.
a shovel, with little energy, will
make 1t easier for your horse and
your conscience.
ii. Don't try to convince your
horse that he is on skates when his
feet strike the slippery road. Go slow,
my son.
H. Don't fail to oil your wagon
axles. There is a heap of humanity
in axle grease.
is. Don't over check your horse.
NatUie's curves are always graceful.
Ia. Don't forget that there is more
profit in coaxing horse than i'm
kicking him. Try gentleness and see
how it grows on you.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Endorsed by the County.

"The most popular remedy inOtsego
county, and the best friend of my
family writes VIM. NJ. Dietz, ed
itor and publisher of the Otsego Jour
nal, GilbertsviIle, N.aG., lis DIR.
Kings New DiscovSyHt has proAed
To be an infaliible cure for coughs
and colds, making short work of the
worst of them, We always keep a
bottle in the house / believe it 10 be
ahe most valuable prescription known
Tor Lung and Throat diseases Guar
anteed TO meyer disappoint the taker,
by Jackson5 frugigts. Price soc and
". Trial bottle free.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Everybody Should Know

says I. @. Hays, prominent bust
ness man Of Bluff, Mo-, that Buck
lens Arnica Salve is the quickes
and surest healing salve ever appiled
10 sore, burn or wound, or to a case
OF piles. I've used il and know that
IN talking about" Guaranteed at
Jackson's drug store, 25c.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Regular as the Sun

is an expression as old as the race. No
doubt the rising and setting of the
sun is the most regular performance
In the universe, unless it is the action
of the liver and bowls when regulat-
ed with DIR. Kings New Life Pills.
Guaranteed at Jackson's drug store.
25c. ~....t
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Report of the condition of
TaZeWeII National Bank,

at Tazewell, in the State of Virginia,
at the close of business, February
II, 1908.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28

Use DeWitts Little Early Risers,
pleasant little pills. They are easy
to take. Sold by Jackson.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
. - & = r.. H.
Bears tLo ziae Nd You Have haays Bong
signature 's &xNAAzzx

a great many people, during these
GAY OF prosperity, high tariff and
protection, are living and supporting
their families on hope and soup a
great deal of hope, but not much SOUP
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28
Report of the condition of
FIRST NATIONAL BANK
OF POcaIIontaS

at Pocahontas, in the State OF Vir-
ginia, at the close OF business, Feb
Tuary, II. 1908.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28

kodol for Dyspepsia and Indigestion
Is The result OF a scientific combination
OF natural digestants with vegetable
acids and contains the same Juices
found in healthy stomach. 1t is the
best remedy known to day for dyspep-
STA, indigestion and all troubles Arising
from disordered stomach. Take
kodol today. 1t is pleasant. prompt
and thorough. Sold by jackson.
Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1908-02-28

n Pills relieve pain.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Her Hidden Ambition.

There is an instance, rare in the pro.
session, of musician who had little
enthusiasm for her calling, Just az
Fanny Kemble, the actress, was by nd
means enamored Of the stage and
would have quit 1t had not circum-
stances bound her there. A brilliant
young violinist, native Of Holland,
played one day for Edward VII. when
he was the Prince Of Wales.
'sIs there anything you care more for
than your Stradivarius r asked the
prince, expecting, Of course, q negative
reply. &
The young Netherlander colored q lit
tie. THE violin is not an absorbing
passion with me. your highness," she
replied.
"Ah! Perhaps you have leaning to
another branch Of art?" suggested the
prince.
Indeed, have notr' the violinist
said in burst of confidence. aBut,
your highness, just love to cook! I
really believe I should make an excel
lent chef il had the opportunity d
practice New York Tribuns.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Shave Yourself.

Buy q Keen Kuter Safety Razor.
Do it now and shave yourself with
ease, comfort and economy for the
rest Of your life. Blades require NO
honing or stropplng. Years Of effort
have resulted In producing a safety
razor that will do all that is claimed
for It. We want You to know 1t as
we know 1t. Our proposition: Take
one and use It for 80 days, and ii
found unsatisfactory return It and get
your money back. Keen Kutter goods
are known and used in every quarter
OF the world. World wide use is the
result. not the cause OF their suprem.
acy. See Wolbert's east show win.
dow. 1t is full OF Keen Kutters.
g. w. WOLBERT HARDWARE co
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
A PERSIAN SERVANT.
8 No Was Poetieal Even if Useless and
Dishonest.

5 No Was PoetieaI Even If Useless and
Dishonest.
In one way Persia reminds one dim
" Of England, for there are such things
as difficulties with servants even in
Teheran. The author dismissed one
Of his servants, who, as he had been a
tailor, was incompetent to do anything
but sew on buttons. The man pro-
tested, "What will become of me now
that I have been eating your salt for
such long time and am driven out
into the streets? He was reminded
that he had only been employed for a
fortnight. He answered that he felt it
had been fer years. He was told that
he was no good, but his volubility on
~ increased. How can be no good
after having stayed with your Can
you forget what Sa'di said: "A piece Of
clay having fallen into the Hammam
from my beloved's hand into mine, /
said to 1t, Art thou musk or ambergris
that I am drunk with thy perfume,
which catches at the hearth 1t an
Bwered: I was but a worthless piece
of clay, but I was in company with a
rose for moment This companion
ship transformed me or else should
still be the same piece Of clay that I
was'"
One can pity the state Of an English
mistress confronted with such an az
gument. The author kept his servant
another week, and he remarks discon-
solately that in that time he discover
ed that If the tailor was poet he was
also a thief .-London Globe.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
SPEAKING PLAINLY.
The Judges Request and the CounseI,ss
Prompt Response.

/: The Judges Request and the CounseI's
Prompt Response.
A young and afterward distinguished
attorney from an up country district OF
New York state was arguing his first
appeal i'll the old general term Of the
supreme court. He had been In many
legal scrimmages in Justices courts
at home. but had never stood In the
awesome presence of five sedate and
learned judges Of the supreme court
In general term assembled. His EN-.
barrassment was great. He repeated
himself and misplaced his words SO
often that 1t was quite evident that he
must soon be routed by his own con-
fusion unless something should occur
to break the SPELL Finally, and Just
as he was foundering the deepest In a
chaotic tumble of language and ideas,
the presiding Judge interrupted with
the following remark:
"Mr. smithers, believe It win be
great relief to yourself and to the court
Il you will address us in the same free
and Informal way that you doubtless
nse In addressing your local justice Of
the peace"
well, then" replied smithers, II
wish that while ! am busy alleyiatins
your honor's dense ignorance Of tia
law You would keep your confounded
mouth shutw The court laughed
heartily and waved for him to proceed.
He grew eloquent and won his case n
the midst Of hearty applause. -Bohc-
milan Magazine.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
A @Fine Old Woman

During the evening gentleman
came to Mrs. Siddons and said, mad
am, beg your pardon for asking SO
rude question, but in consequence Of
wager allow me to ask your age"
She replied, ''Seventy-eight years
old"
"Hang it." said he, II have lost"
And he abruptly went away.
Mrs. siddons Immediately said, "Pup-
pyv'
VERY true" observed, "but why
did you tell him you were SO old?"
She replied, whenever lady Of an
uncertain age, as It is termed, is asked
how old she is she had better add ten
or more years to her age, for then the
inquirer goes away saying, What a
fine old woman!' journals Of Sir
George Smart"
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Eoresiaht and pelie.te...,,.

In Chicago is a woman who COM
bines the functions Of caterer and
trance medium, serving her customers
with refreshment psychical or phys
teal, according to their wishes.
Either she or the sign painter whom
she employed must be a humorist, for
her sign reads thus:
Madame Blank, caterer and trance
medium. Groceries and Provisions"
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Waysids comnunino

Waysids comrnuninss.
Wareham Long-Wot started the hard
times anyway?
Tufold Knutt-We did, ye ole fool!
We wus sunerin' with 'em long fore
anybody else caught 'em. - Chicago
Tribune.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
ouarantced Ghosts.

mo Intelligent person pays any at
tention to ghosts" said the dogmatic
person.
Perhaps not" answered Miss Cay
enne, unless the ghost has been able
to secure an Introduction from some
psychic research society," Washing
ton Star
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Loeatino the ai.ynAl

Father-W Why, when was your age
didn't have as much money In
month as you spend In day. Son
Wen. pa, don't scold me about 1t. why
eont You go for grandfather
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07

Cosmetics injure the complexion.
The highest tyres Of complexion bea.
ty comes through the blood. Hol.
listers Rocky Mountain Tea makes
rich, red blood, gives you that clear
healthy complexion, which will wash
but not rub off. Csc, Tea or Tablets
LENEART DRUG co.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
The Bohemian.

All, once q bohemian always a boz
hemian!" exclaimed the unscissored
poet. "a bohemian never changes"
No, not even his collar" replied the
practical man, who had met few bo-
hemians. Chicago News. 81
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1908-03-07
Best Healer in the World

Rev. F. Starbird, OF East Raymond
Maine. says: 4 have used Bucklen's
Arnica salve for several years, on
my old army wound, and other o,
sttnate sores, and find # the best
healer In the world, ! use ii too with
great success Ia my veterinary bust.
ness" Price sc. at Beardsley &,
Finnsy's drug store.