The Baltimore County union. [volume] (Towsontown, Md.) 1865-1909, 1908-11-28

they started at a full run down the
road. Clattery bang the cart went,
and both Job and the deacon were
compelled to hold on the cart stakes
to prevent being bounced out of the
cart.
''Stop 'em Stop 'em I" shouted
the deacon. "I want 10 get out.
Whoa Whoa Whoa, you varmintsl"
But the oxen only tossed their heads
and ran the faster. "Stop 'em, can't
you?"
Job was downright mad by this
time. "Stop 'em yourself, you old
fool !" snapped he. "You know as
much how to stop 'em as l do"
"We'll be chucked out and killed I"
shouted the deacon, as the cart bang
ed over stone.
The oxen were now thoroughly
frightened and running away for fair,
and both men were badly scared and
holding on for dear life. All at once
an idea struck Job.
Say, deacon, can't you talk some
sea talk to 'em? That's what I've
alters heard Ike talk to 'em," he call
ed out as the cart bumped along.
Brother Haines, such sea talk as
I've heard amt proper fer pillar of
the church to repeat, and I'll call
meetin on you fer this if we git out
alive" replied the deacon, with as
much dignity as he could assume
while holding to the stake.
do try, deacon - shouted the
terrified Job. cit may save our lives. ("
Just then the cart gave fearful
lurch and the deacon banged his head
against the stake he was holding to
with considerable force. This made
him boiling mad in addition to his
fear. "Splice the main brace Shiv-
er my timbers Pipe all hands to
grog !" and then, as that had no ef-
feet on the frantic team, Boat ahoy |"
and then, losing all control of himself,
"Ahoy Ahoy Drat you, you blank
ETY. blank brutes p and the deacon
let out such string of profanity that
Job turned a shade or two paler.
While this was going on the oxen
had got over considerable ground.
The people along the road gazed in
-mouthed astonishmeDt to see two
such staid citizens going along so
furiously with an OK team and were
terribly scandalized at their apparent
hilarity.
Ike, totally unconscious of what
was going on at home, was plodding
along to ward his chum's when he
heard fearful clatter coming behind
him. He turned and could hardly
believe his eyes. There came his
pets Jack and Billy at furious pace
and his uncle and the deacon in the
cart.
Stop 'em, Ike Stop 'em p shout
ed his uncle when he saw Ike.
Ike stepped to one side of the road,
and as the cattle dashed up called out:
"Belay, Jack Belay, Billyl" At
the sound of the familiar voice and
command they stopped at once and
went quietly up to their young master.
"I'll have the law on you for this,
Job Haines," snarled the deacon as he
painfully descended from the cart.
"And I'll call church on you r. re-
torted Job as he rubbed his bruises.
1T won't belong to any church with
a man that kin swear like you kin.
A purity deacon you be -
eff had brat like that, I'd skin
him alive - roared the deacon as he
glared at the bewildered Ike.
Isaac, take them cattle home at
once" said his uncle. GAS for this
wicked man here, shall never no.
tice him again"
Ike took the cattle home. His un.
Gle walked His aunt told him about
the contemplated sale, and, though
he expressed commiseration for his
uncle, it is doubtful if he felt any.
His aunt said it served them just
right. Ike kept his oxen.