Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1908-07-03

SUNDAY. no NOT douDt IL 4 look
up the collection. bohemian.
Caller Ito child)-Is this papa's little
boy or mammals little boy? Child
Dunno; the Judge hasn't decided yet
Life
Hyker-Bronson tells me he is taking
mud baths now Pyker-Why. | thought
he was out of politics. Chicago Daily
News
She-It's funny you should be so tall.
Your brother. the artist, is short, isn't
he? He (absently) Yes, usually
Town and Country.
HAS the patient generous reserve
force, nurseT' mo, doctor; he has
nothing but mean temperature
Baltimore American
Grace So you have at last made up
your mind to marry Jack2 Lola--Yes,
I'm tired of having him hang around
The house every evening Chicago Daily
News,
Don't you ever get homesick, cap
tain7" asked the passenger on the ocean
liner. No; I'm never home long
enough" replied the captain.--Ex-
change
Bronson-My next-door neighbor is
always looking ahead for trouble.
Woodson-For example. Bronson
Well, this morning / saw him sharp
ening his lawn mower.
Miss DeMulr--I wish | could think
Of some new and unusual birthday pres
ent TO surprise mamma with this year.
Mr.. Spoonmore-H How do you think
she'd like q son-in-law?
Cleverton (who has hired taxa
meter cab to propose in)-Say "yes,'
darling? Miss Calumet me time
to think. Cleyerton- Heavensl But
not In herel Consider the expense -
Life.
The Lady Ito misunderstanding bur-
glar) Pardon me, but won't you please
wait till my husband sees you1 told
him there was some one in the house.
and he said Rubbish i"-Harper's Ba-
Ear
Dick You look worried, old fellow.
| Wick-I have cause for worry Dick
What's the trouble7 Wick Ny wife
says If / don't accompany her to the
seashore this summer she'll stay at
| home.
Boy (who has been naughty and sent
out into the garden to find a switch
| TO punish him With oh, mummy, |
couldn't find Il switch anywhere, but
here's stone you can throw at me-
| Punch.
Physician Wen, what do you com
plain Of? Pollceman--sl eeplessness,
doctor Physiclan--At what time do
you go to bed? Pollceman--Oh, don't
mean Mt night | mean In daytime
while I'm on my beat.
She Ton her bridal tour) oh, Dan,
! I'm so unhappy Dan--Why. what Is
! the matter, darling? Shelf | am az
/ much to you as you say you can't be
sorry your first wife died, and that
makes you too brutal for me to love-
| Life.
Doctor The room seems cold Mrs.
| Hoolignn. Have you kept the thermom-
| eter AT seventy, as | told your Mrs.
| Hoollgan Shure, an Oh hoy, docthor.
There's tn devilish thing In toombler
nv warrum wather at this bllssld min
mt. Judge
Mamma--C;ood gracious, George!
What is the matter with Freddie
Jones2 is the child having 1T?
George No, mamma You know Fred.
die shutters. and we bet he couldn't say
"aititudinously" before Bobbie ran
twice around the block--Puek.
Towne-Do You believe in dreams?
BROWNIE used to, but don't any
more. Towne-Not as superstitlous as
you were, Ell? Browne-oh, 1t wasn't
question OF superstition. / was in
love with one once, and she Tilted me-
The Catholic Standard and Times.
Cyrus Reuben got bunkoed. silas--
How so7 Cyrus Why, he read the adj
yertisement of firm that stated II he
would send a dollar they'd send him
some light reading. Silas--And did
they send III Cyrus-Yes, they sent
him two books entitled "rhe Age of the
Arc Lamp" and How to Make Can
dies"
"John," she whispered, there's a
burglar in the parlor. He has Just
knocked against the piano and hit sew
eral keys at once I'm go down." said
he "Oh, don't do anything rash !"
Rash Why, I'm going to help him.
You don't suppose he can remove the
piano from the house without assist
ance Y'-The Throne.
IL tell YOU" said one man to an
other as they emerged from the corri-
dor OF "A concert hall, II envy that fell
low who was singing" Envy him"
echoed the other Wei, If were GO
ing to envy singer I'd select some
body with a better voice His was
about the poorest | ever heard" It's