davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
Headache from Eyestrain.

Basing himself on his records Of
nearly 1900 eye examinations, DR.. S.
w. S. Toms claims that 80 per cent.
of all those suffering from reflex or
neuralgia headache have ocular de-
fects, declares a writer in the Family
Doctor.
Over 600 of the patients examined
were altogether unaware of their de
feet. Fully half the cases were of
only slight retroactive errors or muscu-
lar unbalance, and it is in these cases
in which ciliary spasm is the direct
factor in causing headache in persons
whose occupation calls for near vision
that accommodative asthenopia re-
Suits
There is no apparent relation be-
tween the severity of the headache
and the degree Of the ocular defect,
and nothing especially characteristic,
except perhaps the patients non-sus-
picion Of the cause. Sickness or
health impairment may be the first
melting factor in some patient with
considerable ocular defects which
gave no trouble before.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
King Frederick and the Sentry

King Frederick and the Sentry.
Frederick the Great of Prussia often
told laughable story of an expert
ence of his own. During one of his
campaigns in Silesia he made it his
habit to stroll through his camp in
disguise at night to come in touch
with his soldiers. One night he was
stopped by a sentry, but giving the
proper password, was permitted to
proceed. Instead of doing so, how
ever, he endeavored to tempt the SEN
try into accepting cigar, saying that
a smoke would solace his long watch.
ut is against the rules" said the
soldier.
"But you have my permission" said
the king.
"Your permission! Who are you?"
II am the king"
''The king be hanged" said the in
corruptible sentry. what would my
captain y?"-London Tribune.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
& Greet "tlterary Detective

Prof. William Henry Burr, whom In,
gersoll called great 'literary detec.
tlve," is well-preserved old man Of
"a, AS pamphleteer he stands with.
out rival in this generation. He has
been official reporter Of the United
States Senate, court reporter in Ne9
York, official reporter on the Congress.
sional Globe, and lifelong advocate
Of the Baconian theory of Shakes.
peare's authorship. He has we'll nigh
proved to the satisfaction of many
hard thinkers that Thomas Paine was
"Junius," that Lord Bacon was the
Prince of Wales, being the son OF
Queen Elizabe+.1; that Gov. De Witt
Clinton committed suicide; that Will
liam Morgan was murdered by Masons
and that there are IA self-contradtc-
lions in the Bible.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
Set Sea GullS to Work.

Oh Nanaimo comes the story
Cry sing government fsher:> -
f,I.. 4! VITO is enlisting The servi
:,.>nds Of sea gulls in the ia:
{. t>2nl1g UP the immense nurlh::.
a herring dropped owe: boa
! D ats at the different wharv
e cargoes are loaded on the veg
SO
lille making his rounds recer:!
Viz art: tied up his gasoline launc.
Z y" Of tie wharves while fgui';
60 the best method of attempting |
.t.rn;e the fish. Neglecting to switc2
o.: re power, the propeller chucne
Il: We water to such an extent t. &
e e number of dead herring cam
u tn surface, thousands of sea gull
iirnle;iately swooping down and glut
ting themselves on the fish.
The experiment was made at sew
e!al Of the other wharves, and il
eve"y case the gulls performed tn,
ASK which would have entailed con
SO :able expense had it been dor.
by manual or mechanical labor.-Ne~
:, e3tnlinster Correspondence Seattl;
'cst-1ntelligencer.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
One Definition of Critic,

"The late Edmund Clarence Sted-
man, the banker-poet," said a maya
zine editor, twas really a better critic
than poet. He had a high opinion Of
the critics functions. Attacks on the
value of criticism always angered
him. He used to tell about typical
attack of this kind. He heard it at a
supper after the theater. It came
from an unsuccessful actor. Mr..
Stedman was replying to the toast,
Our American Critics. He began
with the query, uttered in a ringing
voice.. :...* ..s=4$ Z
. :" What is critic?'' II, @%
"The unsuccessful actor, in the en-.
suing pause, answered from the bot.
tom of the table: ..zs @ss ii
"a man who doesn't know ! good
thing when he sees it,
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
Proud Of Church Services.

Yin commemoration of his half cen.
fury of service as usher in the Ply
mouth church. Brooklyn, ex-senator
Stephen M. Griswold, the well-known
banker and millionaire, gave dinner
the other night to 16o members Of hia
church. A set Of engrossed resolu.
tons and loving cup were presented
to Mr.. Griswold, who in short
speech said: II began as assistant
usher in the west gallery and have
been steadily promoted until 1 am now
chief usher in the main aisle. Do you
know I am prouder of the fact than
l am of being banker and million.
aire." Mr.. Griswold is now seventy
years old.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
a HARD STRUG GIL.E |: !:
Many "a Worthinston Citizen
Finds the Struggle Hard.

With back constantly aching.
With distressing urinary disorders.
Daily existence is but struggle.
No need to keep it up.
Doan's Kidney Pills will cure you.
Worthington people endorse this
clam.
VIM: Yahn, Clary Addition, Wor-
Ellington, Mimi, says: 81 used
Doan's Kidney Pills and found the m
to be exactly as represented. suffer-
ed from backache for years which I
believe was the result of the hard
ships I endured during the war, My
back ached continually and freqqent-
ly sharp pains would seize me and
I would be unable to move. When
these pains passed off, there was a
dull aching and a miserable weak
ness in my back. There was also a
distressing irregularity of the kidney
secretions and | lost much rest on
this account. l tried many remedies
but failed to find relief until Doan's
Kidney Pills were procured at F. M.
Hickman's drugstore and I started
using them. They went Immediately
to the seat of trouble and in a short
time banished it altogether" (From
statement given Nov. 18th, 1867
TINE IS THE TEST.
On Oct. 22nd, 1907, Mr.. Yahn said
Il have no reason to retract anything
from the statement [ gave in 1909
concerning Doan's kidney Pills as
have suffered no return of the
trouble.'
For sale by all dealers. Price sc
cents. Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo,
New York, sole agents for the Unit
ed States.
Remember the name-Doan s.
and take no other.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24

STATE OF M1NNEsOTA-county of No.
b1es-ss.
In Probate Court, Special Term, March 80,
1908.
In the Matter of the Estate of John Koehn,
Deceased:
On reading and fling the Petition of Will
liam Koehn, administrator of the estate of
John Koehn, deceased, representing, among
other things, that he has fully administered
said estate, and PRAYING. that a time and
place be liked for exa mining, settling and al
lowing the al account Of his administra-
ton, and for the assignment of the residue of
said estate to the parties entitled thereto by
law.
It is Ordered. That said account be exam
ined, and petition heard by this Court, on
Monday, the 9th day Of April. A. D. 1908,
at one O'Clock p. NJ, at the Probate Office in
Worthington, ip said County. ,.>'1
~ And it is Further Ordered, That notice
hereof be given to all persons interested by
publishing copy Of this Order once in each
week for three successive weeks prior to
said day of hearing in the Worthington Ad-
vance, q weekly newspaper printed and pub
1shed at Worthington in said County
Dated at w orthington, Minnesota the
3Oth day Of March, AID. 1908 .33s
5z. .st By the Court.
S&s (Seal:) 5ess e. M.CORY, d
"a ASH a3a'11l: .#& !. 4 Judge Of Probate.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
TOO MUCH FOR MRS. DRUMMoND.
,lngratitude of User of Telephone Was
H. the Last Straw.

When the Drummonds put in tele-
phone they were lavish in their offers
Of hospitality. to the neighbors. TITS
the unlimited kind" said little Mrs
Dru1nmond, proudly, $50 it doesn't
make bit of difference how long or
how often it's used.'
AS time went on, Mr.. Drummond no.
tlced that when he returned to his
pretty suburban home at night his
WIGS race often wore tired and har-
raised expression. At last one night
sne seemed so depressed at the din
ner table that Mr.. Drummond felt the
time had come for him to speak.
I'm sure it's that telephone that's
at the bottom Of your trouble" he
said, grimly, in the midst of his awk-
ward attempt at comfort "Come on,
you might as well tell me about it"
i haven't minded the Lawtons dis
cussing all their diseases with the
doctor over it, because they have low
voices" said Mrs. Drummond sadly,
land I've tried not to listen when Mrs.
Gray ordered her groceries and pro-
visions and haggled over the prices.
1T wasn't pleasant to have Miss
Howard scold her dressmaker, and
then have the dressmaker call up our
number next day and screech that un-
til her last bill was paid Miss Howard
would have no new gown.
"None of those things were pleas
ant, but I didn't say anything" fal.
tered Mrs. Drummond. But day be-
fore yesterday Mrs. Lombard came in
while was out. Lena told me when
got home that Mrs. Lombard was
here telephoning long time. And
to-day some lady in town called up our
number and said, Kindly tell Mrs.
Lombard that Miss Keith regrets that
after all she. will be unable to go to
Mrs. Lombard's tea on Saturday.
Horace, she's ordered all the things
and invited all the people over our
wire, and never asked me at all!"-
Youths Companion.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
They Must Be Hardy.

Secretary Wilson of the departm ent
Il agriculture referred at recent
elmer in Washington to the amateur
florists who spring up in the suburbs
q his season by thousands.
More florists, perhaps, than flowers
spr!1g up" he said.
"In seed shop the other day l
heard one Of these amateurs complain
about the last batch of seeds he had
bought. After he had ended his CON,
plant he began to ask floral ques-
tons.
"*Oh, by the way he said, what is
a. hardy rose?' d. IT,
"It is one growled the dealer
that doesn't mind your wife pulling
it up by the roots every day to see If
1t has begun to grow yet"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
AAW BARGAIN IN NEW LIGHT

George Washinaton's Judgment Of II
Would Have Been Rapid.
had talked with the farmer in the
seat with me for quarter of an hour
about crops and the weather when he
switched off the subject by saying:
Il think I made a rather good bar
gain uptown to-day"
I'm what?"
my wife wanted q pair Of shoes,
and I remembered seeing lot Of Sec
ond-hand ones when I was in town
last. So I went up town and for a
dollar got pair just exactly as good
as II had paid 81 for pair at home.
It's business to save dollar whom
ever you can, amt it,"
"Of course. Had you any other er-
rand uI OWN"
"Nope; I just went for the shoes. y
whats the fare up and back?"
"A dollar ten
"And you've lost about a day%
About a day."
I said nothing further, and after
about ten minutes had passed, during
which time the farmer seemed to be
doing some thinking, he all at once
turned and said:
"Say them shoes cost me 10 cents
more than a new pair would right al
home!"
Exactly"
"And you had it figured out ter
minutes ago."
Eyes,"
"Waal, stranger, George Washing
ton was purity big man from all &C
counts. but if he had been in you,
place I don't believe he'd have beer
zen seconds in calm me blamed
olj FOO '-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
TALE CT TWO :, r ! 7: :.
HAPPY, THOUGH THiNLY. cLA~
AND COLD.
Deep Drifts and Flying Snow Of Little
Monent-And Think of 1t!
A Whole Perry to
Spend.

They were Flooding throu~h ~
snow during the storm, little tots WI,
were thinly clad, with blue faces and
big bright eyes. Their little baby fl.
gers were peeping out of ragged a.
tens, wet with snow. Their slo>:
were filled with snow, because !.
buttons were off at the top, and the
tops were loose.
One of them was little girl about
six years DID, She wore calico l~5s
and her stockings were patched with
darning marks from knee to an:
Around her neck she wore a Wom.l :
fur neck piece of the style of ten V AT
ago. The other was a boy, and ~
thin little legs were covered by t~c1
,sers which bore the signs of he y"
tailoring. He swung his arms again :;
his body for full minute
"Nhy don't you do this?' he asA2;.
ITS a dandy way to git warm"
Cause girls can't act that woy
lisped the other little tot "M21l1l:.
says it amt ladylike"
But she eyed her companion VII
evident envy. The pair trudgei al:
stumbling over drifts and siaI:-.
their eyes from the flying snow. A:
the girl held an arm before her eye
the snow was blown into her sleeve
leaving her arm chafed red.
An automobile whisked by, ani
:through the glass windows the tc
saw two other children, coy and rosy
and warm
"Gee," said the boy, 1T would b.
fine to ride in one of Them
But just think if they. tipped over
said the little philosopher by his sid:
And we amt got far to co.
They came to crossing, and turro
to cross the street. A prancing to-
passed them, held in check by a Uni
formed coachman The little g:
skipped out of harms way just in tn :
nick of time.
Lets rum" said the boy.
AID they ran through the snow,
laereI h< =: (,
Gee" said the boy, you amt much
of runner
He stretched his little legs and &c
away half block ahead of her. IT,:
girl stopped GREATNESS, and half-> >.
ing.
The boy stopped, and stood th~o>
Ing snoWballs at a signboard, try:
to look uncOncerned. When the g:
stCnDed again he looked back RI
ming quickly to meet her, he threw h:
arms around her, half crying himself
Gee he said, don't cry. Yea
don't have to be runner. l like yea,
anyway. Girls amt got to run. W..
got a penny
The sri stepped crying Her fac
Frightened.
can yea spend it, really?' sh
ask l. sEyly.
BET can. I earned it, shove,,ia.
snow"
Then I guess l am able to walk as
ia: IS the candy store,' she SAID.
A. away they went, the girl az!
the Boy, cold forgotten, hand in hard
: = like you, if you do make me run. "
wis., cred the woman of six.-Milwau
kee Free Press.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
Sailors Dread of the Dead.

The intense dread which sailors and
fishermen have Of the dead is preva
lent among all nationalities and the
horror Of the Chinese sailor when ask
cd to carry corpse on board is
shared by his brother sailor on every
sea. They say *'the sea cannot digest
the crudity of dead body, it being a
due debt to be inferred where it neth,
and ship. cannot abide to be made 4
bier Of"
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
For horsemen

The season for horse cards and
bills is here and The Advance lob
department is we'll supplied with pa
per, type and cuts to turn out such
work in the best and most attractive
style, For outdoor advertising we
use heavy jute manila, which with
stands all kinds of weather. When a
card or bill of this kind is put up it
STAYS putt If you want any work
of this kind, we shall be glad to take
your order.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
HoW's This?.. I:

q 2a4ss=%ES s1VWSS tlUS1 :z5t.-E stse 49,,
We offer One Hundred Dollars Re-
ward for any case of Catarrh that can
not be cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
F. j. CHENEY & CO.,
Toledo, O.
We, the undersigned, have known
Z: ). Cheney for the last Is years
and believe him perfectly honorable
in all business transactions and inan-
cially able to carry ont any obliga-
tions made by his firm.
WALD1NG, K1NNAN & MARVIN,
Wholesale Druggists,
Toledo: O.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken in
ternally, acting directly upon the
blood and mocous surfaces Of the svs-
TEN. Testimonials sent free. Price
IS cents per bottle. Sold by all drug
gists.
Take Halls Family Pills for con-
stipation.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
Helping Him.

. g"Jinx is dressing better than usua
lataly.' X. & ,......> T. d. .s.4:.
Eyes, his wife has been helping hin
to reduce expenses = n - z4SSssSS
n Ellis wife? Why, man, she was di
vcrced from linn year ago!"
s@..I know tt; but she has married
again, so he doesn't have to pay any
more alimony q Houston Post:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24
A Risky Flight.

A Risky Flight.
Out at Ponce de Leon in the circle
swing a Billville citizen shouted:
Don't take me no higher! Maria's
been in heaven sence last August an
eff l keep goin' up this away she'll
likely lean out the winder an snatch
me bald headed. "-Atlanta Constitn,
ton.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1908-04-24

Jealousy Not Always Present.
"You opera singers are all jealous,
aren't you?" quizzed the friend.
"Oh, no." replied the prima donna,
lots of us never sang in church
choirs."
Connecticut western news., 1908-12-10
CANAAN

Now doth the merry maiden fair Buy presents small and great; But it doesn't seem to worry her,
 For papa pays the freight.
 Rain at last.
 Did much good.
 Only three weeks more of 1908. Mrs. H. D. Humphrey spent Friday and Saturday in Pittsfeld.
 George Peet, of Bridgeport, was in town for few days last week.
 Bliss Jane B. Walton has been spend ing few days with Sharon friends.
 Miss Lila Johnson, of Norfolk, spent Sunday at Mrs. Della Hardenbergh's.
 H. H. Bridgeman and wife, of Norfolk, were in town for brief time Monday. Mrs. L. J. Nickerson, of West Corn wall, spent a few days at H. D. Humph- rey's this week.
 Miss Belle Roger has been spending a few days with her sister i'll Sharon Valley.
 Percy, the little son of MT. and Mrs. H. R. Whitford, who has been ill, is rapidly gaining.
 A son was\born, December 1st, to MT. and Mrs. Edward Smith. of Mlllsrton, formerly of this village
 Mrs. w. c. Bullock and Mrs. A. V. A. Felten spent a few days in New York city last week.
 MT. and Mrs. T. L. Shields. of Water bury. Conn.,, were over Sunday guests at James McCormick's.
 Mrs. Abbe and children and Miss Ella Considine were in Great Barring ton Friday.
 Adolph Nelson, who sustained a fractured leg by falling from a tree a a few weeks ago, returned from Hill crest hospital this week.
 After January 1st it will cost Canaan ties no more to send letters to their friends in Germany than it now costs to send one to Ashley Falls.
 Roy Stanton, son lof Mir. and Mrs. Rexford Stanton, who has been Ill with scarlet fever for a number of weeks, does not progress favorably toward re- covery.
 Miss Isabelle Roger, of this village is one of six ladies for whom votes are be- ing cast in kitchen cabinet contest uow being conducted by the Millerton Telegram.
 Rev. E. 0. Gillette, N. Watson Hard. enbergh and R. D. Peirce attended the dinner given at Delmonico's, NswYork, Friday evening by Carl Stoeckel, of Norfolk. aA
 O. R. Dubia, formerly of Ashley Falls was in town last week. He has been spending a number of months in New Hamphire where he has been operating his portable saw mill .1.
 Last week there were five persons from North Canaan, receiving treatment in Hillcrest hospital, i. e., Mrs. H. E Holt, May Lorrain, William Devine Adolph Nelson. of Canaan, and Mir l Warner, of East Canaan.
 F. A. Baker of "The Canfield" plans to serve one of those Christmas dinners for which the hotel is now famous. Ii will be remembered that large number of Canaanites partook of the most ex cellent dinner served on Christmas day last year.
 The barber. F. w. Yutzler, went tc Canaan Monday to get hls hair cut West Cornwall correspondent Newtowr Bee.
 Now what do you think of that A barber who couldn't cut his own hair Additional Canaan news on page 7)
Connecticut western news., 1908-12-10
The Toy Department is Paradise fol
 The Little Folks.

Iron toys friction toys, tin oy dolls flies panos drums harmoncas, tool chests coors wheelbarrows horns backboards toy wagons Xylophone seds dominoes doll carriages spring guns combination safes Christmas decorations Christmas be Christmas candles 6 doz 15c candle holders, tinsel, baskets of artificial fruit.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1908-01-15
HOW To FLoAr a PIN.

pin upon the prongs of a fork, and
then, holding the fork at an angle of
forty five degrees, place 1t very gently
upon the water. watching your oppor-
tunity to remove the support.
This may require a little practice,
but ySu win soon be able to succeed,
when you will see the water assume a
convex form on each side Of the pin.
and as soon as the pin has replaced
enough of the water to counterbalance
its weight 1t will float like little boat
This experiment may be made with
a needle, as well as p,n, 1t being
necessary only TO place IL upon the
water so carefully that the water can
not wet IL. That may sound like an
inconsistency, but It is possible. never
theless. to so lay the pin or the needle
upon the water that it shall not be
made wet.
r. you find the experiment with the
fork only partially successful, try this
simpler method: Lay a sheet OF ciga-
rette paper evenly upon the water, aud
upon the paper place needle or a pin.
AS soon as the paper gets wet through
It will sink below the surface, leaving
the needle or the pin floating. BY us.
ing great care you might perhaps sue
coed after awhile in floating a dime
or a gold dollar in the same way.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1908-01-15
The Huntsman,s Mass.

"Once every year. on st. Hubert's
day. one may see hundreds of dogs In
the Cathedral of Notre Dame at Brus-
sells. At the huntsman's mass on that
day the owners Of hunting dogs take
the animals to church with them,
and for short time the sacred edifice
becomes a dog show place." says a
writer in a Berlin paper. To heighten
the effect all the worshipeSs attend in
hunting costume and the bugle plays
an important part in the musical serv-
ice. When the last celebration took
place a stranger in the city, who was
staying at one of the large hotels near
the place. strolled toward the cathedral
and took with him a pet spaniel. "Ev-
cry dog has his day." he said, "and
this is It," AT the church entrance
two pointers growled at the little dog
and did 1t SO fiercely that the little fell
low turned and ran. He was coaxed
back, but again driven away by anoth-
er large dog. "The owner took the
hint" says the writer, land returned
TO the hotel with his little pet. con-
WINGED that the big dogs looked upon
the spaniel as an intruder. that he had
no part in the St Hubert's mass and
that the day was not every dogs"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1908-01-15
Wnr Dc Efnsst Er,1its-

An interesting discussion in the Brit
fish Royal Horticultural society q few
years ego as tc what was the finest
fruit in the world ended by giving the
palm to certain yellow nectarine
raised from a peach by the late Fran
els Rivers. Next to this perhaps comes
a properly ripened greengage, one of
the best varieties Of the plum. The
greengage came into Europe by way
of Italy and from Italy was brought
to France early In the sixteenth cen.
fury by the wife Of Francis L.. IN
whose honor it received the name Of
Refine Claude, by which It is still wide
ly known. Soon afterward 1t was in
troduced into England from Italy I'M
der the old Italian name verdoch and
about the same time from France.
The latter importation, however, came
with lost labels to family Of promi-
nent English amateur horticulturists
Of that day named Gage, from whom
the fruit received Its present name
London Chronicle.