The Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 188?-1913, 1908-04-30

Cheap Papers arr WORTHLESS rap~s~
-Fraad~ and How Th~y Read.
the P~opls-krauduient -. Hom-
e~t Advertisements Dim
ers I'm New York-Nighf Risiers in
kcutueky-a Girl burglar

ers I'm Sew York-Night Riders in
Keutueky-a Girl burglar
Correspondence of The Caucasian
Enterprise.
BilkinsvilIe. y. C.. April II. lses.
| | wuz lookIn' over Northern pa
per terday. an noticin' the suscrtp-
shun price. hit struck me that even
a plain ole sitizen like me may be
able ter give the fellers that publish
newspaper sum advice. fer | hear
that the newspaper business IL not
very profitable az a general thing
The paper | wuz lookin' at liz pub
lished twice a month at 10 cents a
year. three years fer 25 cents. 81 90
fer a life subscription. Hit IL what
they call literary or story" paper,
an hit IL large paper. Now that
liz about the same az IL sum oy the
farmers would sell cotton at two
cents pound. wheat at 5 cents a
bushel an corn at 8 cents a bushel.
Most people would buy frum the
| farmers that sells at the low prices
1 oh liN Houtu uC
Same way with the merchants; If
they didn't sell at a livin' profit they
would soon be bankrupt.
Ov course them cheap papers
can't take the place ov local papers.
| But they helps TO demoralize the
business an dissatisfy the people. A
guide many people don't know wheth-
! er it costs $500 year or $4,000
Pa year ter publish an ordinary week
ly newspaper with a small circula-
shun an they don't care much whut
it may cost.
Fer a plain ole sitizen like me hit
seems that the newspaper business,
will never be on an equality with
other lines ov business till they liz
change big change-an' sum way
fixed ter stop the foolish habit ov
publishin cheap newspapers an ov
publishin' newspapers on a credit
hardly half the papers sent out being
paid for, though they compete with
other papers that are paid for, or
should be.
Sumtimes them cheap papers air
used ter advertise frauds. That
hurts the advertising business. A
young boy will read anadvertisement
that sez if he will send 10 or 25
cents the advertiser will mail a rem
edy that will cause a heavy black
moustache ter grow on the upper
lip ov the boy in 2 or 3 weeks.
The boy sends the money an either
gifts nothin' or gifts a worthless vial
ov powder or liquid, an the NOUS
tache does not appear. Another ad-
vertiser guarantees ter send a sure
hair-grower an promises that hit
will grow heavy growth of brown,
curly hair upon any bald head in a
month or two. The baldheads read
the advertisement a few times an
sum ov them send on a dollar or two,
an instead ov growing a lot ov curly
hair the stuff takes out Ov root the
few Scatterin' hairs they had left
upon their shiny scalps. They air
out ov sum money, lose confidence
in the advertisements found in the
cheap papers, an they then look upon
awl advertisers az frauds, which liz
not the case.
If you will read sum papers you
will find purity nigh everything ad
vertised, from $40 buggies ter wife
or husband Awl you hev to do liz
ter send ten cents an git the names
ov several hundred rich girls who
want to marry an support husband.
Sum of them air worth az much az
hundred thousand dollars, an ac-
cordin' ter MATRIMONIAL agency, they
air willin' ter give every dollar ov hit
fer a husband, though he mite be
dear at 80 cents.
I see that sum ov the sports had
a big dinner in New York sumtime
ergo that cost $4,000. While they
wuz eating a number of canary birds
wuz turned loose in the dinin' room
an they flew erbout and sung sum
sweet songs. Ov course eatin' is a
very nice little game. But / never
thought that rich extravaganza wuz
best fer the country. Hit dissatisfys
them that would love ter make a
display, but can't, an hit discour-
ages them that air poor an hev hard
work ter git meal.
Sum people try ter poke fun at
fancy farmers an their work. l
can't see hit that way. Farmin' is
jist like anything else, hit kin be
done nicely or hit kin be done in
way that makes a farm look like
a wilderness; no system. no beauty,
no success.
don't hear much erbout the
might riders" in Kentucy now. Il
guess they air still KILN people an
burnin' tobacker barns. They hev
curious idees erbout life in Ken
lucky. If man don't do rite they
air ready ter kill him, an if a man
don't do wrong they air ready ter
kill him. wouldn't care ter live
in country like that l guess Ken
lucky is sorter like North Carolina
viz, afflicted with two many poll
ticians. They keep the people stird
up awl the time with sum hobby an
they fergit who made them an let
their passhuns and prejudices git the
best ov them greater part ov the
time.
Out in Chicago, which liz the wick
eldest sity in this country, an 1S-year-
old gur1 burglar wuz arrested the
other mite. She had been going into
houses breaking in for sum time