Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1908-10-30

on The STUMP.
~ Drummer Takss Z opslib,ndss's
Place, and Tells Why He Locks fes
On Avalanche In Misunderstanding
lily, but Straight He TaIies-'lh,
Junction Dill" and "Errand boy
Sherman" and Assumes the Reie
Of non-craeksr-The Scared
Householder and the Burglar.
Nonroevills's Democrats, assisted b.
ne county committee. had planned
what tho posters called "A Monster
Bryan Ratification Meeting" The Re-
publican school teacher remarked that
he Arst three words e the placar4
6elA more truth than Ill the rest Of
0o Sheet but then, 10 was . recent
Importation from Boston, and . was
expected q cit b the seat Of tho
soornful. 0ndisturbsd BY any such
grammatical peccadilloes. most Of
1onreeville's thousand voters. and
several hundred msn from the outly.
31g country, turned cut to hear tho
0usic and the speech-making.
There was eo1stornation In the
ranks Of the committee whom tho eve-
llng train brought no Lawyer 5quires.
~ bright oraterieal light upo4 whom
heir faith had besn pinned. The
noeting had begun before the train
arrived; the prsliminaries had been
disposed Of and the local talent we'll
nigh exhausted when the nonplussed
committee arrived with tho bad news.
Before 1t could be broken. however:
Zod Aumford, tho hotel-keepor, whose
committee badge outshono bio diar
0ond, had IN inspiration. Why not
ask Tom Harkins, Ware 4 Taro's star
drummer, to give the crowd tho same
sort of talk he had made to tho boyS
In the hotel lobby that afternoon? Tom
wasn't bashful. being q salesman. and
he knew human nature better than ho
knew anything else except Ware i
Tare's line.
Thus it came about that instead Of
q pompous orator in q frock coat,
there was introduced 4 well-groomed
young man in brown, who began BY
saying: "'Ain't it awful, Mabel!' I
blew into this burg to talk Ware 4
Tars's dry goods, and here they've put
ne up to show a line of Republican
green goods. Instead Of . big gun,
you've got q Cannon-cracker, for I
want to take . crack 1T Joe, since he
and Senator Son-in-law Oilrich are
moro of an issue than Teddy's expand
cd shadow, Injunction Bill. /
wouldn't be afraid OF the big stick In
Taft's hands, any moro than Wall
street Is afraid Of it; but Taft 10 only
the respectable cigar-store front OF
the meanest gambling Joint that ever
stacked the cards against sucker.
The real owners arc Cannon, Aldr1ch,
Rockefeller, Hartman and that whole
push. Uncle Joe's lightest cuss word
Is weightier than Taft's most delphio
deliverance. For what Cannon says
goes, because he does not speak until
he has been spoken to by the men
higher upland tho higher up where
Cannon goes for ordes is not heaven,
either. Do you catch my point? There
10 no voting for Protege Taft, or En-
rand-Boy Sherman, without voting
for the continuation and Strengthening
OF the Republican ring in house and
senate, q ring SO crooked that, except
for = few months in presidential year.
OVSu LuS HNSpuDlACdu SuASOAS dAO ASPt
busy telling the nasty truth about 1t.
II you want more Of the reign Of the
gang that has proved itself mixhtier
than even Terrible Teddy then vote
for the amiable Taft and the shrink
ing Sherman"
The crowd had been rather too
dazed by the rapid-fre, unconventional
talk Of the drummer at first to make
1~,S% III hA "a
murmur approval by such phrases a.:
talk" "Give him smother hot one" etc,
The speaker paid no heed to these in
terruptions, but continues:
Il had . next-door nsighbor once
who woke In the night and found 4
hall light burning downstairs. HI
thought it was burglar. What do YOU
suppose he did? He stood upstaira
shivsring in his nightis. hoping the
burglar would 60 away. u that thu
way you do. when your wife shakea
you that there 10 burglar down
staiys7"
Not on your lifel" calculated q
,bushy man in the audience: Il g
after him.
VI COOIDO yOU w. 0V VOSD 0VVSy
other man who has red blood instead
OF skinned milk In his veins. Be
cause you are q man. the head Of your
house, and responsible for its safety
and the safety OF your family, and YOU
face any danger that threatens your
home. In the exercise of this primal
right, which every male who grows
hair has considered sacred and bind
ing since the days of the stone age,
when 4 man guarded the entrance to
his eave-home with a club, you would
be willing to front the devil himself
well, gentlemen, that is just about
what is up to you to-day in this politi.
cal campaign. Your fundamental, in.
therent manhood rights are at stake.
Your country, which is as sacred ia
you as your home myriads Of patriots
have left their homes at the call OF
country-has been invaded by thieves
and robbers. The ideals Of American
government have been violated. Your
property rights have been taken from