The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1908-01-12
I'd hate to live up north, would;
Now, honest, wouldn't you?
Where only three months in the yea
Shirt waists are peek-a-boo?
The New Years here, take down your
book,
And turn a new leaf Ger
And then proceed to blot it,
Just as you did before
J. Benjamin Mabry.

Not long ago a well known play
wright decided that he would like to
have theatre of his own in which
to produce his own plays. He didn't
have money enough to built it. but he
had a wealthy friend In Wall street.
As soon as the idea set in him, the
playwright visited Wall street and laid
the scheme before his friend, The Wall
street man put his feetto his mahog-
any desk, listening attentively He adj
mitted that he had few hundred
thousand dollars lying around loose,
yet wasn't particularly enthusiastic
on the theatre project. "Why write
plays?" he demanded, at last. Write
checks. "-Argonaut.
After tea she brought over his pipe
and slippers.
john she whispered, tenderly, edo
you know my conscience has been
hurting me and 1 have formed a little
conscience fund"
Conscience fund.-" asked the big
husband in surprise.
Yes, sir. 1 have been borrowing a
few dollars out of your vest pockets
every night for a week and here is the
entire sum-
''Weni Well! You are an honest lit
tie woman"
And John?"
well, my dear?"
fNow-now that have been so hon.
est, would-would you mind giving
me the conscience fund to buy the
pretty autumn hat I saw in a window
ay?"-Chicago News.
There is a high officer of the army
who perhaps has not forgotten a re-
tort made to him by clerk serving
in the war department This officer
treats the clerks as he does enlisted
men in the army. He was recently on
duty in Washington, and kept him.
self busy by bustling around the di-
vision under his control and requir-
ing the clerks to attend to their du-
ties every moment of the seven and
half hours they daily give to the
government. One day he found
young woman rubbing her eyeglasses
what are you doing, madam" he
said, brusquely. Don't you know that
you ought to be attending to your du-
ties?"
Il was wiping my eyeglasses" she
responded, land it is necessary, be-
cause there are things so microscope
cal that it is desirable for me to have
reinforced sight to see them. Kan
sas City Star.
Senator McLaurin, of Mississippi, is
proud of the success Of the blind men,
Der of the upper house, from Okla
bona. Mr. Gore.
"Wen do / remember" said McLau-
rim recently, when Gore, blind even
then, was a politician in Mississippi.
He was a candidate for the state SEN
ate, and his opponent for the nomina-
ton was trying hard to win, but care
fully refrained from stating what he
expected TO do at Jackson, or what he
stood for. Gore became exasperated.
and made a point of challenging him
every time they met in joint debate
to tell what his position was. You
dare not stanl here before this audi
ence of matchless intelligence and de-
clare what you will do at the capital
of this glorious state said Gore This
def was repeated on five different oc-
casions. Finally Cores opponent was
so angry, he could contain himself no
longer OF course / haven't told you
what am going to do. because I don't
know what / am going to do he ex-
planned. who in thunder dealt you a
hand In fhis game, anyhow? Do you
suppose that If I were endowed with
the power of prophecy would be try.
ing to beat blind man for job as
4 Mississippi lawmaker? Gore was
elected. kansas City Times