Omaha daily bee., 1908-07-12
FAvoRITE YARNS SPUN BY TAFT
from the Varied Experi-
ences of the Republican
Candidate.

Among his friends and intimates William
H. Taft is renowned as a story-teller. He
enjoys hearing g. good story as much as he
delights to recount one. He is exceedingly
prone to illustrate a point In an argument
with an anecdote. Most OF Mr.. Taft's
stories are the result Of personal expert
ence. His long service at the bar and on
the bench Of the United States court pro-
vided him with many of his best stories.
The following examples are furnished from
the memory of a friend Of Mr.. Taft, who
heard them from the lips of the republican
candidate for the presidency,
old Judge Thompson, who lived in
southern Kentucky. was walking downtown
one day." said Mr.. Taft, when a brisI
young lawyer said, shortly. 'Howdy,
Judge?' and was about to pass on, when
the judge halted him. Judge Thompson
was a sticklcr for the amount of defer
ence he thought was due him for his judi
cial position and mental Attachments
so he bristled at the rather formal
greeting Of the lawyer and said sternly,
Young man, l fine you SO! Completely
surprised, the offender said, Why, Judge?'
For contempt Of court. sir replied the
judge. Contempt of court! exclaimed the
lawyer. why, Judge, l didn't know that
court was in session right here on this
Sidewalk Sir Numbered the judge, this
court is always in session, and therefore
always an object Of contempt, sir. Go
and pay your fine to the clerk immedi-
ately.'"
Tom Marshall, another Kentuckian, got
on . rampage one day in court" said Mr..
Taft, land delivered himself Of some senti-
ments that aroused the ire Of the judge,
who imposed 4 fine of $40 for contempt.
Marshall protested that he had not a cent.
Borrow it of a tricnd.' SuTtJy returned the
judge.
Well, your iN1sr,' repded Marshall,
you are about the best friend l have.
VIII you lend me the $1O?' Remit the
fine directed the judge, turning to the
clerk Of the court, the state is much
better able to lose $40 than ] am"
one of the old time lawyers of the
south whom l used to meet when 1 was
holding court down in Tennessee said
Mr.. Taft, would tell with roars OF
laughter an incident that happened to
him soon after he had put out his shingle.
His office had previously been occupied
by a cobbler. One day when he was busy
getting up a case an Irishman came in
looking for the cobbler.
" The cobblers gomez said the Irish
man. He is said the lawyer, shortly.
And what might you be afther selling?'
asked the Irishman, regarding the sparse
furnishings and the few books in the
office. 'Blockheads,' replied the lawyer,
'Shure, business must be good retorted the
Irishman, looking hard at the lawyer; 1
see you're all sold out but one "
Mr.. Taft takes keen delight in recalling
to Mrs, Taft's memory an incident which
occurred last fall. the morning the Tafts
1oraoA In V-lohon,a ToDor C.,e-,1
newspaper men. Americans, English and
Japanese. were in the party that boarded
the stean.'hip. One Of the japanese re-
porters. ignorant of the identity of Mrs.
Taft. but recognizing her as a member
OF the party, interviewed her industriously.
Finally he got around to the subject Of
Mr.. Taft's candidacy for the presidency.
do you know Mr., Taft well?' asked the
reporter. Fairly well. 1 think" replied
Mrs. Taft. HE is a candidate for the
presidency" was the reporters next
question. II believe So" said Mrs. Taft.
d you think he will make a good presi-
dent?".
He ought to, think" promptIy replied
Mrs. Taft; che is an excellent husband"
rs that so?" interestedly queried the re-
porter. May I ask how you know"
Certainly" said Mrs. Taft, Il am his
wife" The reporter failed TO see the Joke
and the interview appeared verbatim.
Some one asked Mr.. Taft upon his re-
turn from a recent speaking tour I'm the
wet II the trip did not fatigue him. He
replied; Somewhat, perhaps, but not the
way a farmer friend of mine once COM
planned he was fatigued. He had another
farmer brought before a justice Of the
peace on a charge Of assault and bat
terry. and was asked to give his version OF
the affair. We'll" began the farmer.
1T went up 10 Bilrs place to talk over a
little business, and got to arguing. He
accused me of saying something that I
hadn't said. and ] called him a liar. Then
he up and knocked me down, and before
I could get on my feet he grabbed me by
the whiskors and dragged me all over the
place Were you hurt or frightened
while this was going on?" demanded the
lawyer for the defendant. "Well no, I
cant say that I was frightened much"
replied the farmer, but, by gosh. I was
pretty well tired out when he got
through."-New York Herald.