davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Press., 1908-01-22
The Wrong Goldsmith.

"A friend of mine.' said a political orator. "wa., once a good deal annoyed while addressing a meeting by d man In the front row who howled like a dog. At every telling point in my friends argument this man would emit frightful howls and spoil the effect.
 My friend asked the name of the man and was told that 1t was Harry Loff. Then he said in loud voice:
 "'Mr. Loff, it is plain that our friend Goldsmith had you in mind when he said:
 ''The watchdog's voice that bayed the
 whispering wind,
 And the loud Loff that spoke the vacant
 mind.
 "fHe said that, did he? cried Loff furlously, and he turned and struck q little fat man behind him a hard blow over the head.
 ''It was only after five minutes scrimmage and much profane abuse that Mr. Loff was convinced that the Goldsmith referred to was the long dead poet and not the little fat man or the same name"
The Press., 1908-01-22
Sitting on c E4ish Hat.

"If I were to offer to wager that I could sit squarely on my silk hat with out crushing it, you would take me up. suppose" said clubman to fellow member. "Well. you would lose," he continued. "A good silk hat should support the weight of man say 140 pounds without yielding. providing the weight Is applied gradually and care fully. The way to do 1t is to place the hat on a smooth. strongly supported surface, crown downward, and lay a board across the rim, in the hollow. On this seat yourself steadily and slow ly, and you will find the hat does not yield. Of course, hat that has once been bent or broken will not do. Nor is the rule invariable. It applies only to good hats. Have l ever tried it? Yes, have, but not on my own hat."- Philadelphia Record.
The Press., 1908-01-22
PvfhaooraS.

Undoubtedly Pythagoras was one of
 he greatest men of all time. We know very little of him. but we know enough 10 warrant us in giving him d place in the front rank of the worlds thinkers. He was the first moral philosopher and one of the earliest of the worlds mathematicians. It would require too much space to go into the details of the celebrated theory of numbers" but by numbers" Pythagoras meant noth- ing more or less than mathematics. as though he had said, "The first prin- ciple of all things. physically speaking. is mathematical New York Ameri- can.
The Press., 1908-01-22
THIRTY YEARS AGO.
items of local interest taken from the columns
 Of The Press, thirty years ago.
January a4. 1878.

E. Pasco has been appointed post master at Stafford. .r
 Jabez Sidaway. for many years a tailor in the employ of O. Prouty, sd vertises the opening of a shop for him self at his residence.
 The vital statistics of Stafford for the year 1877, furnished for the Press by R s. Beebe, town clerk, are as fol lows: Births, "A; marriages. 3s deaths Al.
 The building committee of che Con. greRational society have recommended and the society have authorized them to proceed to build a church edifice in accordance with plans submitted by l.. B. Vaulk architect, of New York.
 Some fine string of pickerel have been taken from Chaffee's reservoir in Westford the past week. Old fisher men grew quite excited last Saturday evening inspecting a string, said to have been the finest ever brought in town, taken that day by Messrs. But. terfield, Heald, Banford, and Cush. man. It contained 93 pounds If pickerel, one fish weighing pounds ounces, and some others being earl, as large.
 Accidents. "A six year old child of Henry Bolieau fell on the ice while playing near Comin's shop on South. st., last Friday striking upon the back of his head. ani has since been in delirious condition. with partial paralysis of right side though re. covery is hoped for On Tuesday Charles McCarty an eight year old son of Florence McCarty, nile at play at school, fell and dislt cated his left elbow jont. Both these patients are in care of Dr. Newton.
The Press., 1908-01-22
Trimminos.

The other day at golf club in Scot land a minister of the kirk was re- proved by an elder in his church for using high flown words respecting a bad stroke he had made, and the min ister replied:
 "Weel. Dauvid, was nae sac mich swearing as merely embellishing my feelings"
The Press., 1908-01-22
lmpertinenk.

Clara-Well, aunt, have your photo graphs come from MT. FaceallO? Miss Maydeval (angrily)-Yes, and they went back. too, with a note expressing my opinion of his impotence. Clara Gracious! What was it? Miss May. deval-.Why. on the back of every pic ture were these words: ''The original of this is carefully preserved. ."-LOn- don Chronicle.
The Press., 1908-01-22
Of Vital Innortnncs

No other organs of the body are so es- sential to good health .as the kidneys Foley's Kidney Remedy makes the kid neys healthy so that they will strain out the impurities from the blood which is constantly passing through them. Com mence taking Foley's Kidney Remedy at the first sign of danger. A. Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22
Two UnweIcome Visitors Her.

At this season La Grippe and Pneu- monia cause more deaths than consump. tion. Foley's Honey and Tar cures la grippe coughs that may result in pneu- monia ever night. Do not take chances with cold when Foley's Honey and Tar will quickly cure it. A. Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22
How to Avoid AnrendIcItis

Most victims of appendicitis are those who are habitually constipated. Foley's Orino Laxative cures chronic constipa- tion by stimulating the liver and bowels and restores the natural action of the bowels. Foley's Orino Laxative does not ant to take. Refuse substitutes, A. Jacobsen
The Press., 1908-01-22
How ao Avoid PDeumonaa.

You can avoid pneumonia and other serious results from cold by taking Foley's Honey and Tar. It stops the cough, heals the lungs and expels the cold from the system. Refuse any but the genuine in the yellow package. A. Jacobsen ."
The Press., 1908-01-22
The Man He omaa

Short Il got behind with my rent this month. Could you let me have $1O?
 Long-GOt behind with your rent. ehP What is it owing to?
 Short-Why, my landlord, of course. Chicago News.
The Press., 1908-01-22
An Estimate and a Hopc,

You've heard her. you say?" re- marked Mir. Dudley. "Ah, she cer- tainly has the gift of song"
 "Well, I hope that's what 1t S." re- piled Miss Knox. Fl should hate to think she paid anything for it."-Phn- adelphia Press.
The Press., 1908-01-22
A Rru4al. naa.i4i..

Knicker-W What is philanthropist? Bocker-A man who alfes what he doesn't need in . way nobody wants.- New York Sun
The Press., 1908-01-22
A Financial Episode.

A Milwaukee business man stepped up to the teller's window in one of the city banks during a financial furry, presented a check and asked for the money 1t represented.
 'T cannot give you the cash," said the teller. "but can pay you in clear ing house certificates"
 'I would much prefer the currency" answered the man.
 "The certificates are just as good" said the teller
 "Well," returned the merchant, If that Is the case l suppose 1 can so home to my baby and give 1t some milk tickets and say. Here. little one. these are just as good aS lnilkv"
The Press., 1908-01-22
The Case AIteraa.

In France they call gray hair "a lit- tie dust from the road of life," which Is certainly very poetical But when you find "a little dust from the road of life" in your butter the poetry yan- iShes at once.
The Press., 1908-01-22

It depends upon the pills you take DeWitt's Little Early Risers are the best pills known for constipation and sick headache. Sold by finders Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22

Don't take cold, but if you do, don't fail to take Kemp's Balsam to prevent serious consequences. Nothing else is so valuable in treating coughs and colds. 4
The Press., 1908-01-22
lAf4 Ont In AhA Cnld.

Elder discussing the new minister's probation discOurseb-In my opeenion he wasna justified in dividing folk into the sheep and the goats. I wadna just say, Jamie. that I was among the unco guid, an I wadna say that you were among the unco bad. So whar do we come in? He'll no do for us, Jamie. Wen no vote for him.-Lon- don Punch.
The Press., 1908-01-22

Help the stomach to take care of a hearty meal by strengthing it with Mi o-na. No distress or indigo ,tion if you use Mi-o-na, 50c box; sold under guarantee by Anders Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22
A Card

This Is to certify that all druggists are authorized to refund your money if Fol ey's Honey and Tar fails to cure your cough or cold. It stops the cough, heals the lungs and prevents serious results from cold. Cures Ia grippe coughs and prevents pneumonia and consumption Contains no opiates. The genuine. is in a yellow package. Refuse substitutes. A. Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22
The Whole Show.

Visitor-And what is the special dis tinction of this theater7 Actor-l.- Flie0ende Blatter.
The Press., 1908-01-22
STATE OF OHIO. CITY OF rOLrDO,l sa

Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he is senior partner of the finn Of C. J. Cheney q Co. doing business in the City Of Toledo, County and State aforesaid. and that said firm will pay the sum of ONR HUNDRED DOLLARS. for each and every case 0f G'ataTrh that cannot be cured by the use of Halls Caaarrh Cure. FRANK J. CHIMNEY.
 Sworn to before me and subscribed in my presence, this 9th day of December, A. D. 1866
 A. w. GLRAS IN, VcAAhl NOTARY PUBLIC. HalTs t,atarrh Cure i6 taken. Internally and acts directly on the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. Send for tesl imonials free.
 F.J CHKNET & CO, Toledo, o.
 Sold by all drugR1gS8s 75GE a' Take Halls Family Pills for Constipation.
The Press., 1908-01-22
The Bast Part.

Tommy, did you give your brother the best part of the apple, as told you to?"
 "Yessum. l gave him the seeds. He can plant them and have whole or chard"
The Press., 1908-01-22

JAPANESE Napkins at The Press Of CD nce-10 cents hundred, 800 for a5 cents
The Press., 1908-01-22
Ever, body loves our baby, rosy sweet al

Every body loves our baby, rosy sweet and
 warm.
 With kissy places on her neck and dim
 ples on her arms. -.. Once she was so thin and cross, used to cry with pa n-- Mother gave her GA oAswEET, now she $
 well again Sold by A. Jacobsen
The Press., 1908-01-22
Doeberry's Poetry.

Giving evidence at Marylehoue, a young constable said he found a dag ger on man he had arrested "A what?" Mir. Plowden asked as the con- stable held the weapon up to view "Why call 1t a dagger2 It has not the slightest resemblance to one" Well" faltered the constable. "a sheath knife" MT. Plowden returned: "Yes. Now, try in future to be less picturesque in your descriptions. You cannot be too mat ter of fact in the witness box. I dare say you have Jennings toward poetry in your nature, but you must stife them in the witness box" = London Standard.
 Do you have backache occa ionally, or stitches" in the side, and sometimes do you feel all tired out, without ambition and without energy2 If so, your kidneys are out of order. Take DeWitt's Kidney and Bladder Pills, They promptly re- lieve backache, weak back inflammation of the bladder and weak kidneys. Sold by Anders Jacobsen,
The Press., 1908-01-22

produces GAne results i'm 80 days. It acts powerfully and quickly. Cures when others fail Young men can regain their lost manhood and old men may recover their youthful vigor by using REVHVO. It quickly and quietly re- moves Nervousness, Lost Vitality, Sexual Weakness such as Lost Power, Failing Memory Wasting Diseases, and effects of self-abuse or excess and tndiscretion. which units one for study. business or marriage It not only cures by starting at the seat of disease, but is great nerve tonic and blood builder. bringing back the pink glow to pale cheeks and re- storing the mre of yOuths It wards on ap- preaching disease. Insist on having REYIVO, no other. Is can be carried in vest pocket By mall. elsOO per package. or six for $500. We give free advice and counsel to all who wish it, with guarantee. Circulars free. Address ROYAL MEDICINE CO, Marine Bldu.. chlcaao. m
 For sale in stafford sprinssby
 A.o. RATION, DrugEfze.
The Press., 1908-01-22

When you want the best, get DeWitt's Ca, bolized Witch Hazel Salve. It is good for little or big cuts, boils or bruises, and is especially recommended for piles. Sold by finders Jacobsen.
The Press., 1908-01-22

AcRToN will hreak np Gold in ,r 'chf
The Press., 1908-01-22

 OrOuGGe0u.
By Martha cObb Sanford.

copyrirht, 1907, by Homer sprague.
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07
LINCOLN CITY NOTES.

Peaches have been bringing all they
we're worth at this depot, and on Mon
day there was about three carloads
bought and sent from Lincoln the prices
averaged about 40 cents. A few lots sold
higher. Tuesday and Wednesday about
the same quality came TO market, and
the prices have ruled about the same.
The new church is progressing rapidly;
the concrete has been finished as high as
the tops of the windows and doors, which
are set. The blocks are beautifully fin
ished in pattern, and this will be as hand
some a church as there is in Sussex
county when it is finished.
While cooking the noon meal on an
oil stove at the home OF Harry Southard
last Monday, the oil became ignited and
caused an explosion. In an instant the
cook room was in a sheet Of fire but
fortunately MT. Southard was at hand,
and before any serious damage could be
done, he threw the stove ont the door,
while the oil burned itself out.
While shifting a car of the siding with
a push pole which slipped off the car,
5. q. Colder, brakeman was BADLY hurt
last Tuesday. He was placed on a cot
and sent to Wilmington on the afternoon
train and placed in a hospital
Samuel c. Cubbage has sold bis home
fiftv-acre farm to Frank W. Davis q Co.,
and purchased from them the mill prop
erty located near here and known as the
Lincoln Mills.
A horse owned by George r. Clendan-
iel got fastened in the stable last sunday
night and when found the next morn
ting, he was badly strained. DR.. Rhule
has been attending the auimal, and will
have it in good shape again in a few days.
Mrs Joseph Morgan is III with typhoid
fever, but is getting better.
James Warren an employee of the
Smith Manufacturing Co., is III with ty-
PhOid fever.
Miss Annie Macklin is visiting friends
in Franklin City, Va.
The tomato vines are badly injured by
the wet weather they are scalded and
blighted worse than ever known about
here.
VIM. T. Calhoon was dangerously I'D
with a bad case of cholera-morbus last
Sunday evening, and his case was critical
for time but now be is much better.
Tbirty-six people went form Lincoln
@ Atlantic City op the excursion last
tuesday.
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07

IF the Democratic papers are to
be believed, the Republican nomi-
nations are all completed now, and
only the ratification and shouting
Of a convention is required to
launch a full fedged ticket on the
field. But, is this the true situation'
We can not feel it to be true, and
from every side we hear individual
opinions, which indicate that the
primary election will see earnest
contests, and bring results which
will surely complicate, and possibly
disarrange the slate as set up. We
feel confident that the Republican
party will fight its battles 10 finish
in the convention, and that when
the ticket is nominated, it will be
supported, and elected in Novem-
Der.
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07
Kent Levy Court POstpOnss Action.

The Levy Court last Tuesday again con-
sidered the matter of charges concerning
certain of the county officers. Clerk
Darby was ordered to read the minutes OF
the secret session, which was done in
public meeting, but the minutes contained
no references to the evidence heard on
the charges as abducted by the investigat-
ing cOmmittee--merely some motions re-
quiring a roll-call or each resolution and
a recording of the vote of each member.
The matter was finally disposed of for
the August session by the following reso-
luton, offered by Commissioner Walker,
and adopted
"Be it resolved, That the present in
vestigation committee Of this court be
continued for the purpose of proceeding
with It's examination and for the purpose
of ascertainiDg what in its judgment
would be just and proper financial set
tlement between the county and the par
ties alleged to be involved, ard to make
its recommendation TO the Levy Court at
its next meeting"
The next regular meeting OF the Levy
Court falls on Tuesday, September 1st
Immediately following this action, the
bill of William f. Hartnett, sheriff of
Kentscounty, for 81, los 81 for board of
prisoners, was rejected by the court which
refused to allow it or any part of it. This
was also the action of the court on three
other bills. Calvin w. Snarr, $92.04
John w. Foreaker, 1894 OS and forty-one
Of the forty-six items on the bill presented !
by s. L. Shaw, justice of the peace,
amounting to SOL Is. These were practi- |
cally all for the arrest and commitment |
WW
The bill of John T. Baker, of SlS06, |
less $3.50 which was deemed an over
charge, was allowed, the committee hav-
ing investigated and found that Baker
actually arrested six men for trespassing |
IN the property Of R. D. Short. William
I. Simpsons bill of So 70 was also found |
% have been for actual arrests of men at
he call Of William Tharp, on whose prop
,rty they we're trespassing.
A number of politicians Of both parties
we're present, expecting that there would
'e s0me surprising developments, but the
oT ri kept at work on the routine county
usiness until a short time before adjourn
0 INT hour. Assessors were allowed the
} lowing cash pay
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07
HARRINGTON.

Whites 81. f. Church is undergoing
repairs
Paul Money, Of Cheswold, is the guest
of his grandmother, Mrs. Henry Money.
Thomas Clancy Of Edge Moor, is
spending week with Mr.. and Mrs R.
W. Ross.
Miss Dora Smith is visiting friends in
Maryland.
c. A. Harrington will have a public
sale on Tuesday, August the 18th, at his
home near Harrington, on the road lead
ing from this town TO Vernon.
Mrs. Henry Knox has returned from a
lengthy visit with her daughter, Mrs. j.
Tatman. of Kansas City. The NissH
Tatman accompanied her here and will
spend the season with their grandparents.
Miss Sallie Roache Of Accomac, Va, Is
the CUES; of her uncle, Mark ROache.
Miss Ethel Hardesty of Wilmington
and Miss Nellie Murphy Of Pennington
are the guests of Mrs. Kate Sheldrake.
Mrs. Mary E. Jump has been enter
tanning company from Philadelphia
Mr.. and Mrs. f. B. Harrington enter
tanned a number of friends at tea We'd
nesdav. Among them we're DR.. and Mrs.
B L. Lewis, Mr.. and Mrs. q. $. Harring-
ton, Mrs. Adkins, of Tenn, and Miss
Shaw. The evening was spent
in games. etc. Refreshments were served.
Miss Elizabeth Gordon is visiting her
aunt, Mrs. Hammond, of Milford.
Mrs. James Shallcross has been enter
tanning her sister. Mrs. Butler.
Miss Mary +. Smith, of Philadelphia,
is the guest of Mr.. and Mrs. CD. Gordon.
Miss Emily Roach has been visiting
friends at Georgetown.
In loving remembrance of Curtis Sapp,
who died June Goth, aged eighty years.
District Superintendent S. NJ. Morgan
was the guest of r. W. Ross and wife the
FIRST of the week
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07
FREDERICK.

The racing at DerrlcksOn's Driving Park
| last Wednesday attracted the, largest
crowd that has been in Frederica for
years Teams came from the lower part
Of Sussex and the upper part of Kent
county as well as from distances Of ten
and fifteen miles. bringing probably a
thousand people. Bowers Beach residents
came in launches and the surrounding
country turned out almost to a unit.
This was because the event had been
well advertised by DR.. Derrickson through
the columns of the CHRONICLE and by
large posters all over the peninsula. The
people were promised good racing, and
they we're not disappointed, for the time
actually made was from ten to twenty
seconds better than that given out this
was done to protect the owners from Civ
ing their horses low marks, and thus
prevent them from entering in higher
races in the future. The 2.40 class was
won by NutteT q Windsor's Buck Taylor
in the time of his class. The 2.3O Glass
was won by Frank Salevan's Easter, also
in the time of the class. The free-fOr-all
was between Ashland Bird owned by
Harry B. Windsor, Hattie o, owned by
Thomas Curry, of Greenwood, and Miss
Larabie, owned by W. R. Huttenlock, of
Milford. The former won in time OF 2.59
so it was given; but those who beld
stop watches made the time 3.19 It was
certainly great day for Frederick, and
there were politicians by the score present. |
Mrs. Elizabeth Johns, who is visiting
Mrs. Rim Sipple, gave a very interesting |
talk at the NJ. E. Church on Sunday |
evening. The topic for the Epworth |
League service was ''Prejudices," and |
her talk was on that line. She is force
ful talented speaker and held the atten-
tion Of an sppreciative audience.
Grand Recorder Thomas L. Taylor was
present on Monday evening at the initia-
lion of fifteen new members to Loyal
Lodge No. 20, of the Ancient Order Of
United Workmen.
Services next Sunday evening at the
N. E. Church will be in charge Of the
Milford chronicle., 1908-08-07
Rer. and Me. Dash

/ EpWorth League. Rev. and Mrs. Dash
iell are taking their annual vacations.
Tomatoes are Tipening early this sea,
son, and in such quantities that in all
probability j. S. Reynolds will begin can
ming at his cannery next week.
! Eli Cain is having his farmhouse paint
ed in pretty eolors, which is a great i'm
provement along that road. His out
/ buildings have been painted recently.
Rice 4 Schabinger also are having their
new cannery painted, which greatly inn
proves its appearance.
The Ethel 3" a beautiful yacht own
ed by Mr.. Bigelow, Of Baltimore, Nd.
has been lying at the wharf for several
days. 1t is a splendidly equipped boat
for pleasuring and naturally attracts much
attention here as few of the kind ever
come here. Mr.. BigelOw is a brother OF
Mrs. DR.. Hoey and his family spent sew
eTal days here as her guest.
MillWood Sunday School passed through
town on Wednesday enroute for a day at
old Bowers.
Mrs. w. Darby, ,Sr. and Miss Elizabeth
Darby are spending week at Rehoboth,
Mrs. J. T. POstles, Mrs. Walter Carrow,
Mrs. Elizabeth Williams and Miss Eliza
beth spent several days at Bowers last
week.
Mrs. Harry Cropper, of Wilmington,
spent several davs with Mr.. and Mrs. n.
Y. Harrington last week
Mr.. and Mrs. Derrickson, of North
Carolina, are visiting DR.. and Mrs. Der
ricksOn.
Thomas Spnrry, wife and children visit
ed Mrs. Burris OF Houston last Sunday.
Miss Anna Williams, OF Wilmington, is
visiting Mrs. r. W. Reynolds.
Miss Thelma Spurry is visiting Mr..
and Mrs. Edgar Harrington, Of Franklin
CITY, Va
Miss Bessie Emerson has been at Ocean
Grove several weeks.
Asa Clark Rogers, of Scranton, Pa, is
visiting his parents, Asa Rogers and wife.
Miss Pauline Hudson is visiting Mrs
Maggie Beckett, of Wilmington.
Mrs Bigelow and daughter, of Bslti-
more, who have been the guests of DR..
and Mrs. W. F. Hoey, returned home
Monday.
Ralph Jester is the guest of his aunt,
Mrs John Stevens at Bowers.
Mr. and Mrs Ellingsworth, of FELTON,,
are visiting Harry Boone and wife.
Miss Melvina Lewis, of Smyrna, is visit
ing Capt and Mrs VIM. Palmer.
Dr. and Mrs. Manship, of Philadelphia,
were the guests Of Thos. Kirk and wife
on Sunday
Mrs, J. w. Hall and Miss Ethel Brown
spent last week in Philadelphia.
Miss Mary Hopkins has returned from
Doylestown, Pa.
Mrs. Eliza Whiteley is visiting in Phila-
delphia.
Nathan Spurry, of Newark, N. j., is
visiting his mother, Mrs. Hester Spurry.
Mrs r. r. Postles and daughter, Lii
lian. are visiting in Philadelphia
Mrs. William Spencer is visiting B. F.
Burton, Jr., and wife.
Thomas Jones, Of Philadelphia is visit
ing A. W. Carrow and wife.
Mrs. Sallie Hudson and son Cecil have
returned from a trip to North Carolina by
water
Mrs. Richard Dermott has returned to
Jersey City.
Mrs. Nehemiah KINNEY is visiting her
daughter, Mrs 7. D. Conner