davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The border vidette., 1908-12-19

FOR SALE CHEAP Lot number of Villa Tract" 5Oxl50 feet, being sub- division of part of the Rancho Sausal Redondo. County of Los Angeles. Oal ifornia. A great bargain. For par ticulars address G." care THE BORDER VIDETTE.
The border vidette., 1908-12-19

No. South- STATIONS. No. North.
The border vidette., 1908-12-19
Gaaasaa, Ya9g! River x ?acii!
 RAILROAD Co.

To Connecting Lines:
 We take pleasure in announcing the open ing to traffic. effective July 18th, of second section of the Cananea, Yaqui River & Pacific Extension, Potam to Corral.
 With completion of this section the line will be open to all classes of business between Empalme. (Guaymas junction with Sonora Railwav) to Corral Station nt kIlometer one hundred and two.-sixty-three miles,
 The principal points to which the opening of this line will give rail connection are Torin -Lencho Station-and Cocorit-Corral Station -in the Yaqui River Valley.
 For the present train service will consist of one mixed train each way daily, winch will be operated on the following schedules:
The border vidette., 1908-12-19

EPES RANDOLPH, President and General Manager
The border vidette., 1908-12-19

SONORA TIME.
 Dining stations. Nos. 1 and ?.
 Trains make connection at Torres with Torres Pristas Railroad. leaving at 9-56 a. m and 50 D. m., daily for La Colorado. and Minas Prietas.
 Close connection is made at Guaymas with Pacific Coast Steamship Company's steamer "Curaeao' sailing the 17th of each month for Altata. Mazatlan, Cape St. Lucas Magdalena Bay and Ensenada; well other Steamship Lines, calling at this port. For particulars address, NJ. O. BICKNELL.
 G. r. A., Tucson, Ariz GEO. F. JACKSON, A. G. P. A.. Guaymas. Sonora. Mexico.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
NJ. ON
POKER
PLAYING

he didn't learn French enough to fol,
low the Guy de Maupassant story
which he thinks Fred is telling.
A bas lie Fred! "go ir cfe
I notice in your letter, Bunch, that
you met some of your old pals in
Paris and that you stayed up all night
playing poker.
It's good old wheeze, Bunch, and
no doubt Alice believed you when you
brought home the nine million francs
you won.
OF course she didn't stop to think
that nine million francs is only about
$240 in real money. But why wake
her up?
If you really had to play poker
Bunch, I'm glad you stayed up all
night at it. When you first mentioned
the word in your letter / was afraid
to read further for fear I'd see that at
IL o'clock you got kink in your in
step and quit four dollars winner.
If you play the game, play 1t like a
sport, Bunch, and wear overshoes to
keep your feet warm.
thO pOhCi VIM GCeo
congestion Of the ankles every time
he wins two dollars over his car fare.
Poker players are divided into two
classes; the Companions of the Cold
Feet and the Little Brothers Of the
Boost.
The Companions of the Cold Feet
make the most money, but the Little
Brothers of the Boost have all the
fun and this would be a pretty
tough old world If we couldn't have a
bit of fun with each other, wouldn't it,
Bunch?
We're living out in the country all
the year round now, and once or
twice week the neighbors drop in Of
an evening and try to drag money
away from us.
Uncle Gregory Grant and Aunt Julia
from Kansas City are visiting at
Uncle Peters house across the roo.
Uncle Gregory is the original human
safe. You can't get money out of him
with an AK.
He came to New York on a visit
some years ago with a red undershirt
and ten-dollar bill.
He stayed two weeks and never
changed anything.
Uncle Gregory is charter member
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
SINKS ,AND DRAINS 4 Ere
! 9QUENf CAUSE OF TYPHOID
Purify These and You Will Be
Safe From Contagion.
Borax, a. Simple, Safe and Sure
I as1ia III Method.

Z How to. keep our homes clean, sweet
and free from germ influences As a
question.
While there Is no occasion for alarm,
1t Is always well to be forearmed. on
the theory that IAN Ounce Of Proven
ton Is Better Than Pound Of Cure"
and no ounce Of prevention has yet
been discovered that Is more simple,
more direct and more effective, yet
harmless to the human system, than
Borax. ~
/ Borax has been known and used for
generations as purifier and proven
tive against epidemic influences orig
mating from uncleanly conditions re-
sulting from unsanitary sinks and
drains, and when used as a hot soll-
ton in the proportion of two table,
spoonfuls to gallon Of hot water
flushed through the offending loca-
lions, removes every trace Of disease
germs and renders the pipes clean
and wholesome.
Borax in addition to its hygienic
qualities, is household necessity, and
Cdu uc uScu iOT uumUcTioSS uOLuSbuC
purposes. 1t softens the water, makes
linen dazzling white, will cleanse
every article in the kitchen or din
ing room and make 1t bright, will pre-
vent moths, soften and whiten the
skin, remove dandruff and cleanse the
scalp, and for cleansing and steriliz.
ing baby's milk bottle and nipple has
no equal.
Borax, unlike every other cleanser
and disinfectant, is absolutely harm.
less to the system, and is safe, simple,
economical, and can be purchased at
any druggist or grocery. A dainty
book In colors, called the "Jinglc
Book" will be sent free to any Mother
sending name and address Of her baby
and tops from two one-pound cartons
Of "20-Mule-Team" Borax, with &c in
stamps. Address Pacific Coast Borax
Co., Chicago, Ill.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
Royal Composers.

The Princess Friedrich Luitpold, Sis
ter of the kaiserin, one of whose COM
positions was recently performed at a
sacred concert at Dresden, is the
latest recruit to the ranks OF royal
composers who have challenged pub
lie criticism. The duchess of Orleans,
eldest daughter of the Arch
duke Joseph Of Austria has
won golden opinions by her
charming songs, many of them set
to Hungarian words; the Archduchess
Marie Valerie of Austria has also
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
Twisted All Four Masts of Schooner
James q. Drake.

The four-masted schooner James B.
Drake is OF McPhee's shipyard in Bos
ton undergoing repairs for one off the
most peculiar accidents In the history
of navigation.
While cruising in southern waters
the schooner was caught in a cyclonic
storm which revolved around the YES
sci in such a manner that all four Of
her masts were twisted in their steps.
When the ship carpenters investigat-
ed the schooner preparatory to begin
ming their work they could scarcely
believe their eyes. Plainly some ro-
tary motion of wind and storm had
caught the poles in leverage. fore.
ing them just half way around. No
explanation is offered for the masts
not coming out of the vessel. All four
are standing and have been carrying
sail ali the way to port. No other dam
age was received during the storm.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
JOIN H'l|I[||::h''lE,!'1'''''
BY GEO. v. HosART, t"HUeH M'HueH.9

Dear Bunch: So now you're at
Monte Carlo, Ell?
Gee! you and Alice must be having
the time of your lives hiking over
Europe, handing out good money to
hotel clerks and bad French to hotel
walters all day long.
Oh, what bliss, what Joy must be
your portion, Bunch, when you squeeze
into one of those French cafes, grab
French menu card, glance over the
"ready-to-serves," and in confidential
tone give an order like this to your
French waiter: "Avec le- beaucoHp
pomme de terre. Donnez-moi de Teau
claude; je vais me raser. Avec get
move on you'll"
Then in French hour and half
your French waiter hurries back and
serves you culinary melodrama
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

wherein each swallow is a thrill and
your stomach gets up and yells at
every climax.
can see you and Alice sitting there,
spilling Schenectady French all over
the tablecloth, while the waiter gets a
stone bruise on his palate from hold
ing back his Partisan laughter.
Now don't wrinkle the map when
you read this, Bunch, because I've
been present when you blurted out
some of your French with the ossified
accent and it's a scream all right.
Remember that day in Martins here
In littleoldnewyork when you ordered
lamb chops and a baked potato in
French? The waiter bowed, said,
"Oui, M'sieu!" and brought you a
bowl of vegetable soup and a morning
paper!
That's how good your French is, my
lad
It's almost as bad as Fred Perry's-
and that's going some.
met Fred and Henri Leoni at the
Bingle club not long ago, and they put
it all over me.
With Henri speaking almost French
and Fred gesticulating nearly-French
there wasn't anything left for me to
do but call the waiter and talk booze.
l found out later that Fred knows
exactly nine ordinary French words,
including incest pas and avec plaisir,
but he has memorized the name of
every street in Paris.
So when Fred exhausts his nine or
binary words he rushes all over the
city, out to Vaugrard, over to the
Batignolles, to Clichy. by Rues and
side streets to the eastern Boulevards
Beaumarchais and st. Denis, then
across lots to the western Boulevard
des Italiens, then with hop, skip and
jump, he's in the Place de la Concorde
and off into the Champs lysees-it's
immense!
Fred can sit there and rattle off the
names of the streets in Paris SO clio.
quently that the average listener be.
gins to cuss himself inwardly because
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
/ airing and cash M Ssfole the bank es1.'

firing and cash in3 bsfose the bank exe
plodes. -, N
/, We had o little. poker party at our
house last Monday night, and for. sew.
eral days after we bought costly,
trifles with the money left by our iovs
Ing nelghbors! $50 g III ile
Thee was Uncle Gregory and Aunt
Julia, George Riggaby, and his wife,
Maude, Georges mother-in.law, Mrs.
Lorrenz, Peaches and yours respect
fully.
Uncle Peter ara Aunt Martha don't
play poker, so they went out In the
other room and played the phone
graph.
think the phonograph won, be-
cause they are both easy. 4
George Riggaby Is member In
good standing of the Little Brothers Of
the Boost, and he can laugh louder
and mean 1t when he loses three dol
lars than any man ever met.
But Georges wife, Maude, takes two
aces and pair of jacks seriously,
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

composed number of pretty songs;
the Princess Fedora of Reuss "a prin-
cess OF Saxe-Meiningen) is credited
with considerable talent and originality
in composition; and the Grand Ouch
ess Cyril Of Russia, also possesses con-
siderable gifts as a composer. The
male royalties whose musical talent
has taken the same direction are quite
numerous, ranging from the German
emperor and the Grand Duke Michael
MichaeloMtch of Russia, who made
his debut some years ago with the I'm
fiuenza March," composed while suf-
fering from that uninspiring ailment,
to the blind Landgraf OF Hesse-C assel,
incomparably the most talented Of all
royal musicians, whose many compost
lions. chiefly produced at Paris. are
very highly esteemed by experts.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

while her mother, Mrs. Lorrenz is the
corresponding secretary in the Won.
ans Annex to the Companions of the
Cold Feet.
She certainly runs Uncle Greg a
close second when 1t comes to getting
frappe in the pedals.
Every time Mrs. Lorrenz Is sepa-
rated from so cents something In her
mind seems to give WY with crash.
But Uncle Greg. and Mrs. Lorrenz
love money SO much that every time
they bet blue check they close their
eyes and pretended It was white one.
Any time you see silver dollar
with all the tail feathers pulled out
of the eagle it's cinch the bird once
belonged to Mrs. Lorrenz and the part
ing was bitter one.
She is the original Tessie Tight
wad.
Ever thine,
J. H.
Copyright. 1908. by C. w. Dillingham; Coz
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
TRIUMPH FOR MEAN MAN.
Unbelever In Vacations Kept His
Clerks at Their Desks.

The man who doesn't believe in
vacations gathered his office staff
about him.
II want to read you something,
boys" he said kindly, from the diary
of the great John Wesley. Listen"
And he read: @
To-day entered on my eighty
second year, as fit for any exercise Of
body or mind as was 40 years ago.
I am as strong at 81 as / was at 81,
but abundantly more healthy, being
a stranger to the headache and other
bodily disorders which attended me In
my youth
"In his elghty-fourth year he said
he was wonder. writings:
az am a wonder to myself. It Is
now ~ years since have felt sensa-
ton as WEAKNESS. / am never tired
either with writing, preaching or
travelling" f.:
In the impressive silence that en-
sued the man who doesn't believe in
vacations said:
Boys, Wesley attributed his ex-
traordinary health and longevity to
early rising, to hard work, and above
all to the fact that he never took va
cations"
With grunts of assent the young
men YEARLY took up their pens
again.-Buffalo Express.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

in Zero lodge of the Companions OF
the Cold Feet.
Uncle Gregory never sat in game
in his life without being prepared to
have pneumonia in both heels the mo-
ment he was six dollars ahead of the
game.
He plays them close to his append.
citis. unkie does, and every time he
fills four-flush he feels an awful
draught on the floor.
He has his feet SO we'll trained that
every time their owner rakes in a pot
with four blue checks in 1t they give
him the icehouse signal to cease
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
STORM PLAYS A QUEER PRANK

and although the .masts were turned
they were not injured in the least.
The accident is the first of its kind
In The memories of the Oldest navigat-
ors about the harbor. They say that
of ell the freaky gales reported Of the
tropics this is the strangest. and many
refused to believe the story until they
had visited the yard and viewed the
schooner themselyes.-Boston Tran
script.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

The government is going to lay a
molasses road in Massachusetts. That
Is, it will prepare binder for ma
cadam roads the basis OF which will be
the residue of sugar-cane manufacture,
a by-product for which there Is at
present no known use. But isn't there
some danger that the nmall boys and
girls will carry off the road for all.day
suckers or some other terrible things?
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

A Philadelphia heiress alleges that
she went through mock marriage
with an American for the purpose of
keeping her parents from purchasing a
foreigner with title for her. We can
hardly believe her story is true, be-
cause 1t is reported tina: her mother
has forgiven her.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

An up-to-date farmer in Connecticut
insists on having a flying machine
clause in his insurance policy, arguing
chat flying machines are quite as un.
certain as tornadoes, for you never
know what or when they are going to
strike.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Probably that Milwaukee hermit
who refused to wash for eight years
was not teetotaler and consequently
did not want to encourage any undue
intimacy
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

"Auto-suggestion" is receiving con-
siderable attention from scientists.
Did you ever catch the monologue OF
the man ON his back in the dust trying
TO coax the machinery of one of the
snorting go-devils?
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

A perfectly good imitation of Car.
legie hero medal is offered to the man
who has read all of the political plat
forms, speeches of acceptance and
campaign books.-Louisville Courier.
Journal.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Now that the North cape's cliffs
of the advertising painters we almost
wish that Peary would never give
them a chance at the north pole.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

After suffering for seven years,
this woman was restore to health
by Lydia e. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound. Read her letter.
Mrs. Sallie French, of Paucaunla,
Ind. Ter, writes to Mrs. Pinkham:
~ had female troubles for seven
years-was all rundown, and so ner-
vous I could not do anything. The
doctors treated me for different troubles
but did me no good. While in this con-
dition wrote to Mrs. Pinkham for adj
vice and took Lydia q. Pinkham's Vege-
table Compound, and am now strong
and we'll"
FACTS FOR SICK WOMEN.
For thirty years Lydia e. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound, made
from roots and herbs, has been the
standard remedy for female ills,
and has positively cured thousands OF
women who have been troubled with
displacements, Inflammation, ulcera-
ton, fibroid tumors, irregularities,
periodic pains, backache, that bear
ing down feeling, flatulency, indiges.
ton, dizziness, ornervous prostration.
Why don't you try it?
Don't hesitate to write to Mrs.
Pinkham If there is anything
about your sickness you do not
understand. She will treat your
observation-disclosures andadvise You
free. No woman ever regretted
writing her, and because of her
vast experience she has helped
thousands. Address, Lynn Masa
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Rats no longer are worn in the
hair" says womans magazine. No,
they seem to have been supplanted
by those little rows of mice.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

"All in favor of apple dumplings
please RISE" says the Baltimore Sun.
The ayes have it.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

At the time he casts his first vote q
man is too young to realize that he
doesn't know 1t all.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

A man in Des Moines buys his mo.
ther-in-law five pounds of candy every
week. The scheme should work and
Is safer than the slow poison PLAN
Detroit Free Press.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

We are worried about where they
are going to put the gasoline stations
for these new air machines.-Atlantic
Constitution.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

A Chicago princess who is stranded
in Paris finds 1t is mighty little in the
way of groceries that she can buy on
her title.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
Practical ILLUSTRATION.

Stubb-Who is that in the next yard.
Martha? ~
Mrs. Stubb-Why, that is Brown and
his young wife beating the carpet in
unison.
Mr.. Stubb--Ab, I see. Two hearts
that beat as one. eh?-Chicago Daily
News.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

No one objects to the directoire
gown provided 1t does not look as II
the lower part Of 1t had caught on q
nail
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

OF course plants are capable Of feel
lngs. Hasn't the corn ears to hear and
the potatoes eyes to see? Haven't you
heard the trees moan and seen the
rose blush?
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Flowers may have memories, but as
long as the corsage bouquet and the
honeysuckle on the porch can tell no
tales what does it matter?-Louisvill
Courier-J Journal.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

The wise man who has a good opin-
lon of himself keeps 1t to himself.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

An insurance man says there are
1880 women in New York who are
past rs years of age. This is not sur
prising; there art lots of chorus girls
In New York.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Kerr Hardie advises Americans to
"go into politics. They do. But not
like flock of silly sheep with some
agitator for bell-wether.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

mo woman who wears rat shall
become my wife," says an Ohio col
lege professor. Rough on rats, for
sure.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

1t is hard to tell which tastes bet
ter, the first piece of flanky, juicy,
spicy, raising mince pie in the fall, or
the first cucumber in the spring.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

The Russian minister of commerce
is named Shipoff. 1t is to be hoped
for the trade of the country that he
lives up to it.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

And now comes the pigskin further
to divert attention from the game OF
saving the country-Boston Herald.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Esperanto, of course, is not dead
or even a dying language. Its Frat
Ting in the throat" is an auricular IL
lusion.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

The car is said to have a. dozen
crowns. His head lies uneasy enough
with one.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

You always get full value in Lewis
dealer or Lewis Factory. Peoria. Ill.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Men will have to buy the dominion
of the air with blood. That was how
the land was won and the sea.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
The WretchI

"A philosopher, pa"
Philosopher, Willie" answered
skinny little Mr.. Hennypeck, rs a
married man who does not wish he
wasn't. "-Smart Set.
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

Chicago Record-Herald: Ambassa,
dor Hill will continue to ambass,
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07
ROLAND B. GRIFFITH. Editor.

JASPER. ',....... 49,. MISSOURI
The Jasper news., 1908-11-07

instant Relief for All Eyes,
that are irritated from dust, heat, sun or
wind, PETTITS EYE SALVE, Csc. All
druggists or Howard Bros, Buffalo, N. Y.
Charlevoix county herald., 1908-03-21

Generous Restitution.
A few years ago there went to one
of the northwestern states a Boston
newspaper man whose mission 1t was
to "write up" lynching in that quarter,
although there had not been an illegal
execution in the state for q long time.
The natives took the questions of the
eastern scribe in good part and even
'.jollied" him into believing that for
downright lawlessness the community
wherein he was sojourning was about
the most conspicuous portion of the
United States.
Don't you ever make a mistake in
these lynchings?" guilelessly asked the
Bostonian. That is, don't you ever
lynch the wrong man"
'"rhat happened once" put in some
one, "but we tried to do the square
thing by the widow"
Indeed"
Eyes; we appointed a committee to
inform her that the joke was on us,
and we gave her the choice of the
crowd for her second husband. Lip.
pincott's.
Charlevoix county herald., 1908-03-21

Delicate, weak, nervous women should
especially shun the use of alcoholic
medicines which, from their stimulat-
ing and exhilerating effects may seem,
for time, to do good, but which from
the inevitable effects of the alcohol in
shrinking up the red corpuscles of the
blood are sure to do great and lasting
harm in the long run. Besides they
beget craving for stimulants which is
most deplorable.
Only invigorating and nerve strength
ening effects can follow the use of this
famous medicine for women. 1t can
not possibly do harm in any state or
condition of the system. 1t has been
carefully adapted to woman's needs by
an experienced physician-a specialist
In their diseases. 1t makes weak wom-
en- strong and sick women well.
If a woman has bearing down, or
dragging pains, low down in the abdo-
men, or pelvis, backache, frequent
headaches, dizzy or fainting spells, is
nervous and easily startled, has gnaw-
ing feeling in stomach, sees imaginary
floating specks, or spots before her
eyes, has melancholia, or vblues," or a
weakening disagreeable drain from pei
vic organs, she can make no mistake
by resorting to the use of DIR. Pierce's
Favorite Prescription. Tt will invigor-
ate and tone up the whole system and
especially the pelvic organs.
DIR. Pierce's Favorite Prescription is
q scientific medicine, carefully devised
by an experienced and skillful physi-
clan, and adapted to woman's delicate
system. 1t is made OK native American
medicinal roots and is perfectly harm
less in its effects in any condition of the
female system.
AS a powerful invigorating tonic, "Fa-
vorite Prescription" imparts strength to
the whole system and to the organs
distinctly feminine in particular. Fol-
over-worked, vworn-out,s rundown
debilitated teachers, milliners, dress
makers, seamstresses, "shop- girls, "
house-keepers, nursing mothers, and