The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1908-03-30
THE EARLY BIRD
BY HENRY M. RIDEoUT.
<<TTNHE heather Chinee is pc eular."
observed the second officer
= See the ingenooity To- that

| HpSSiNtu the SecoHu DIilcef
See the ingenooity o that
Teller at the winch, now"
On a white-hot deck the coolies lodged
and clamored "Arrear they shouted,
peering oversize into the humping lorcha.
| The chain ran down rattlingf till they
signaled the winch to STOP with yellow
/ hands waving abstractedly, and wall of
'Abisi'' Grunts and thuds rose out of the
| lorcha in a thin but pungent cloud of
dust; then the watchers at the rail cried,
! -virra-virra!" in frenzy, the chain
clanSed taut, and giant slingful of
brown gunny bags swung inboard with a
| rush, poised over the black yawn of the
hatch, twirled and suddenly dropped out
OF sight to the hollow iron music of the
winch and polygot scream of "Kubber-
| dar-arrea-guar n aba or
The winch boy-an odd little aged China
man In pastoral straw bonnet, with a
sheath knife sticking out. like rudiment-
airy tall stump, from under his blue dun
garee-had hardly eXerted a muscle; in
stead of the fuming, sweating tug which
white man gives the lever he had laid
on calm hand and done the trick Two
bricks, dashed with rope yarn at the
proper point. swung below; and lily
lam" coolie had scored one mechanical
triumph over a Glasgow firm.
Now that's ingenooity," said the Sec
ond He paused to kick at Bengal box
wallah down the ladder, and followed to
cut his sampan loose. Shrieks of protest
oh, zoolum -zubberdustir'-rose and
drifted astern over the glaring harbor.
The second remounted, mopping sweat
from under his pith helmet, and mutter-
ing-'black swine, chatting all the paint
off my Sanctions"
"Ingenooity," he resumed. That's what
counts"
This he elaborated after tiffn, in Mac s
CABIN against the silent engines. We all
smoked Mrs. Middletons cheroots,
scratched prickly heat, and cursed Chit
TAGGING.
But American ingenooity's the most
Ingenious, he declared, patriotically.
What? Oh, Scots be hanged. Hoot. toot.
Mean by it?. Definition? Why, sure. L
mean-er-that quality which-er-which
promotes the general happiness with the
least fuss to all concerned. There you are.
Now let me talk" And here is the sec
ond story:
Before I was in steam this way l
knocked round in oil ships spell and
fought some in the Philapeens, and fore
that prospected considerable in Colorado
and China and all over. Well, crowd OF
us boys was sent up into Sumatra by
some Dutchmen-Padang highlands, ana
way I'D from Port de Kock. we Iound
some gold and lots o dengue 1eVer' bul
the Dutchman naturally didn't pay us as
per contract, and we got back TO Ba'AVlA
with something over five hundred guiid-
ers between four of us, for all our world
ly goods We put up at the best hotel'
and figured how long it would last.
We ought to moved out quick, but after
the bosque things was so interesting III
that little Dutch burg that we kept stay
irg on. Seemed like metropolis anu
..,ttl, civ
graphs, and my lords. and Duck-and-
Dorises, and-and entertainments, we
found that a conservative estimate LETT
us a54 guilders in debt by the time the
next boat sailed, a Chinese boat and deck
passenger at that. 'Twasnt atoSether
cur fault. We'd have cleared out ana
been all right. I've always argued II the
King of Siam hadn't come over to inVesu-
gate Buddhist ruins and paddy grow
ing. He was hot on modern improvements
then: travelled in a yacht, converted
hooker that was improved some. ne
stopped at the same hotel of course, with
push of courtiers and o2 wives, a iuii
pack and him the little joker. Every
thing blossomed out gay at once-one
long state feast. o. course we stayed.
The queens all wore silk knickerbockers,
~ of 'em: an interesting sight, a-floating
round and pining at the windows. w
stayed.
No prospect o. more money, or even
Jobs. The consurs one O. the whitest
men in the east, and helped us a whole
lot, but he didn't hold out any rosy de-
lusions O. grandeur much more.
Finally. | remember, we all sat up tate
one night, loafing round In sarongs IN
the ground floor verandas and listening
TO tree lizards a-calling "To-kay, TO
kay.' the way they do. 1t makes you
thirsty if you like sweet wines. Weh'
about midnight we'd exhausted every
rroiect and were knocking each other a
good deal. All the Kings wives had dis
appeared long ago, upstairs, ana every
| thing was dull and we were peevish.
II see a way @ financing ourselves, l
think says Sam Bird Perhaps. He
was q. big California boy, talked slow and
ley, a farmer-loolSing boy, but one Oh tho
till tomorrer or next day.
Just what we been doing" snaps out
Rassett. Tomorrow and tomorror, and
| tomorrer, shifts into the lean and slip
rered plantation" (Bassett came from the
| Uni of Indiana or somewhere, and ne
knew Shakespeare by the back-httie
chap, big spectacles, thin face and nose
as pointed as a lead pencil--one more
white and the pointd beak; a little
shsrp nose and a little shap voice through
| it-No, Not Shakespeare; BassettD
| That's what you lazy Pacific Shoppers are
always saying" he tells Sam. '"Tomor-
rer. manana, besok-bad as these goo
COOS" :,
/ knew what Birds game was l
thought, and said So
You're trying to sell those snakes
skins to those two French epidermist men
In Noordwijk Saw you pervading round
there. They amt fools. Neither are We,
You'll get 20 guilders-if you have luck.
What's that in our crisis?"
perhaps, was all i said," drawls this
Sam Bird. Don't get hot" And he
leans back and smokes his Paiacombo,
and looks up dreamy at the Royal
Apartments windows in the second
story, through the lana creepers. II
taxidermatist, anyway"
Don't you go figuring on any hirta-
| ton motifs with the forty second
| queen" says Bassett, following MS
glances. THAT don't b'long honorable
pidgin."
"This amt romance" says Bird. quite
disguised. you never see things as
they are Bass-always bookish. This
| is an awful cold proposition.
| We allowed it was, too, and told him
what we thought of him for rousing
| false hopes over a lot o. NANCY snake
! skins that wouldn't realize our fares
| TO Tandjong Prick in bullock cart,
| LET alone a sado. Bassett got real Bit
| ter about 1t.
81 begin to wish you'd left me penind
| at Bencoolen," he says
so do l." agreed Sam Bird, prompt
and hearty.
"Td "a married nice native girl IN