The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1908-05-08

"
A Her name was Lily, and she was a
Fhite COW. That is, she was born
Fhite. but being COW, she had the
.areless sleeping habits of her kind
fhich resulted in grass stains here
md there upon her hide. and patches
q baked mud.
My father had lately acquired her
y the place of a debt that had
eemed dubious.
She was an abnormally constructed
DIV, with what Artemus Ward would
ave called long style of architec-
IRE Long legs, long horns, and a
Dill so long that if it had not been
pr peculiar bend next the body, the
rush end would have swept the
round.
Now, you want to beware, always
|nere are no exceptions to this rule
a cow with a bent poker attach
Nent connecting her tail with her
Pdy, particularly if she wears the
Isl of its length hanging straight
wn. You may be sure that is the
ly straight thing in her makeup.
you have occasion to milk her.
pn't forget this.
Not that Lily held her tail aggres-
7ely. 1t had an air rather detected
IN otherwise, while her meek eyes,
shut, and long horns absurdly
e apart, gave her an apologize,
post an appealing expression,
Itch was altogether misleading.
Now, l had to milk her, and ex-
erience had taught me that If ever
COW was born with an evil spirit,
|at COW was Lily. l could tell by
e hang of her tail when she meant
schief. If it hung straight and
hp from the bend, 1 took care to
rch myself on the stool with view
sudden changes of position. True,
Y premonitions, though always to
depended upon for the climax,
yer taught me when to expect it..
was clear that Lily had a scheme
her own on which she relied with
rfect confidence, for my undoing.
ried to figure it out on some system
astronomical mathematics, recur-
nee OF comets, or the like, but
pile was puzzling with calculations
e generally announced hers by cas-
lily putting her foot in the foam
3 bucket and giving me binding
fitch in the eyes with that diabol-
p tail. She always contrived, too,
get the brush end in the milk,
mellow, before she tapped it over
knocking my cap off my head,
d me off the stool into the milk she
ID tipped over.
was not allowed to punish her.
father was at the head of the
lmane Society in -. No Cruelty
animals allowed on his premises!
In justice to him l must own that
gave me plenty of time to "win"
y by gentle treatment, and the lost
TX so far, had brought nothing but
monstrances, more or less lively.
Eorcing to his mood. But he was
ginning to prophesy concerning
ents that might be expected to take
zee In the near future, if l didn't
ne TO a better understanding with
COW. This disheartened me, be-
use saw no way of promoting such
-
ing to comprehend pure cussed-
p from cows point of view?
l knew this was what allied her,
lead of flies" and condolences. "
my father declared.
one evening l carried out nv
cKet and stepped up alongside of
old sinner. l was feeling pretty
Pd' for I'd just been trading Jack
YES with one of the fellows, and
the best end of the bargain
liing my pocket. Naturally |
disposed to think the best could,
Oh Lily, and she looked meek
,usn TO have fooled Solomon him.
anyway, she fooled me and
ner threw me off my guard. Not
ever gained anything by being
pect
"eii' | adjusted myself to the stool
began my task with half a
ssnt IN the pocket beside the new
} ne, the remaining half on the cow,
tlau nearly filled my bucket with
!. the slightest sign of opposition
$ - my tormenter, when suddenly
. set her great hoof in the milk
gave me a vicious switch with
1ali! Over I went, and all that
4 -, - aeiuge flowed over me!
4 urious is an Arctic word when
Z are really in need of something
D loniy hot. But the English
suage is poor in words calculated
s4press boys feelings in a time
,.s unis. | jumped up and grabbed
su OF the barnyard fence, quite