davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
THE AUTO GOLFER.

An auto devotee was Beggs;
He'd broken all his arms and legs
And drunk OF scorching to the dregs.
He rode both day and night, ef-y VI !.
And in and out of his machine
He srnelled so strong of gasoline
None dared a match to light. - y.
The game Of golf he thought bore.
Said he, why do the buffers roar
The tdiotic warning 'Fore!'
To those who go ahead?
I'll try the game this very morn.
And with proper auto horn
III 'honk to them instead"
His driving from the foremost tee,
Quite wonderful. indeed, to see,
Evoked remarks of "Hully gee!''
Twas straight as well as far,
For toward the hole, with stops fog
strokes
Including foozles, jabs and pokes.
He drove his motor car.
Though bunkered near the putting green.
He drove ahead with his machine
And landed in a deep ravine.
Then golfers came to coach.
"'T1s not the place to drive" they said
1.-THE wonder is you are not dead.
You foozled your approach
Then Beggs, with gargoyle-lilke grimacA
His collar bone slipped back in place
And deity rearranged his face,
Said he, ''I like this game,
And though it's new to my machine"-
He glanced around the deep ravine-
1--WE holed out just the same!'
Earle Hooker Eaton in Harper's Weekly.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
COLLECTING In New HAMPSHIRE.

A New Hampshire man tells Of a
tight listed man of affairs in a town OF
that state who until recently had never
been observed to take an interest in
church matters. Suddenly, however,
he became a regular attendant at di-
vine service. greatly to the astonish-
ment of his fellow townsmen.
"What do you think of the case of
old Ketchum?" said one of the bust
ness men of the place to a friend. els
is true that he has got religion"
"Well, hardly" replied the other.
''The fact is. it's entirely a matter of
business with him. l am in a position
to know that about year ago he loan
ed the pastor $50, which the latter was
unable to pay. so there remained moth
ing for Ketchum but to take it out in
pew rent."-St. Louis Republic.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
outdone hv a Mule.

An amusing story of the capture Of
thief through the fundamentally
of mule is reported from Jersey
City. While the thief was busily
wringing chickens .necks, the animal
started kicking furiously at the chick.
en- house, and before the thief could
escape had brought down the roof and
walls upon him. Entangled in the wire,
and half-stunned by bricks and wood,
the man fell an easy capture to the
inmates, who had rushed out on hear
ing the noise.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
The Starfish AnaIyzed.

The starfish, one of the lowest forms
Of life, has on its back about $4,000
jaws or hands arranged in rings and
bands. By the aid of these it cap
lures many animals for food, even
quick, active fish of considerable size
Prof. Jennings of Johns Hopkins has
photographed the starfish at dinner
and has discovered that even this low
form of animal life has habits"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
Estate of Carl Taenzler, deceased.

ESTATE of Carl Taenzler, deceased. I.
- State of Wisconsin, County Court of
Grant Oounty-In Probate, >:
Notice is hereby given. that at the special
term of the County Court to be held in and
for said county at the court house in the city
Tuesday of March, A, D. 1908 being the 3Ist
day of March. 1908. at the hour of one o'clo:k
in the afternoon. the following matter will
be heard and considered:
The petition of Herman Buchner to adj
nit to probate an instrument in writing,
purporting to be the last will and testament
of Carl Taenzler. late of the town of
Liberty. Grant county Wisconsin. deceased,
and for the issuance of letters teStamentarY
thereon to said petitioner.
By order of the Court.
E. B. GOODSELL, County Judge,
Geo. B. C1ementso1. Atty. for Petitioner.
Dated February 21St, 1908.
list ms. Feb. q: last ms March ~
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
a BIT Hazy,

But" said Brightley, eff you were
sure the fellow who beat you in the
saloon was a policeman why didn't
you take his numberT
"Well," replied Rounds, II had a
number too many already. "-Philadel
phia Press.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
Husbands Testimonial.

A Burman witness, looking in the
prime Of condition, deposed quite COM
placently in criminal case that he
had no occupation. my wife, a good,
careful and hard working woman, sup
ports me-" he added.-Calcutta States
man.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
Too Much Fishing.

If the American boy can go fishing
three or four times a year he thinks
he is having a good time of it, but an
American missionary in China says
that Chinese boys whose parents live
near the water begin fishing when
four years old and put in at least 300
days year at it. They have to do it
for living. When the fish don't bite
the boy is apt to come in for lick
ing
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22

Everybody should be made to work
In this hfe," remarked the political
economist.
IT don't agree with you," answered
Miss Cayenne. There are so many
people who, when they try to work,
merely succeed in getting in the way"
Washington Star. y,
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
The Historians Size.

MacauTay was destitute of bodily
accomplishments. He could neither
swim nor ride nor drive nor skate nor
shoot. But he viewed his deficiencies
with Indifference touched with humor.
When in attendance at Windsor IS
cabinet minister, the historian was in
formed that horse was at his dis
posal. IF her majesty wishes to see
me ride" said he, "she must order out
an elephant Youths Companion.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
A Chance Desired,

Mr.. Wyss-My dear. l wish you
would arrange your hair the way you
had IT last evening.
Mrs. Wyss-Oh, Justin! l simply
can't do that. 1t completely changes
my appearance.
Mr.. Wyss (quiet1y}-I am fully aware
OF that, my love.-Judge.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
snnnethinn Wronn-

The little girl had got up very early
in the morning for the first time.
ooh, mamma" she exclaimed, re-
turning from the window, 1.-THE suns
comm out all right, but Gods forgot
ten to turn of the ACCOMPLISHMENTS
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
Land hf Cider

The left bank of the Rhine in the
neighborhood Of Aix-la-Chapelle and
Treves is the classic land of cider. The
superior brand is called vietz, and this
shares with the Taurus brand the rep
utation Of being the best cider in the
world. In both the speierling or sorb
apple or service apple, small sweet
fruit peculiar to Europe, is used.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
The Truth For Once.

The resolute parent stood with the
uplifted slipper.
Johnny" he exclaimed sternly, 'this
hurts me more than it does you"
And for once the resolute parent was
right. The slipper was two sizes too
small for him, and he had six cOrns
and a bunion.-Chicago News.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
Plenty of.Water There.

Church, hear they've discovered
spring in Wall street?
Gotham - Well, don't know any
surer place to look for water, do your
Yonkers Statesman.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
The Real Test.

Young Physician-Do you have much
trouble in getting your patients to do
what you want them to?
Old Doctor-Yes, at times, especially
when send in my bills.-Detroit Trib-
une
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22
A Postponement.

''WelI, Bobbie, do you like your new
Sunday schoolT
'T can tell better when find out
what they give you for being good" ?
New York Life.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22

week.
Fred Kemper delivered a very
fine carload of hogs to Geo A.
Moore at Sitter Wednesday.
There will be patriotic service
at the Baptist church Sunday even
ing, in memory of Washington's
birthday. Everybody welcome.
The stock shipments since our
last issue are as follows: Thursday,
1 car horses-Milwaukee buyers; 1
car hogs-Place & Jarrett; Friday,
1 car hogs-Geo. Moore; / car hogs
"A. E. Lewis; car hogs-Bennett
ana Place.
Will Zenz, living between Hurr-
icane and Potosl, brought in fancy
bunch of shoats yesterday which
averaged 2b3 pounds, we'll bred
stock and showing good care and
feeding. They were sold to Geo.
A. Moore.
L. G.. Hickok is engaged in
moving his goods from the Ed.
ayde building, where he has been
located for about five years, to the
building south of John Decker's
barber shop, formerly occupied by
Thos. Webb We would like to see
Mr. Hickok meet with the same sue
cess inhls new location that he did in
the old.
The Herald was wrongly in
formed in stating Wednesday that
Mr.. McGuire's lecture of last even
ing would be the closing number of
the season on the Star lecture
course. There is another-Stanley
Crebs, lecturer and entertainer of
great merit, who comes here on
March %.
Instead of the regular preach
ing service at the Congregational
church tomorrow evening, the sub
ject of the evening will be mis-
sions." and several papers will be
read by members of the Christian
Endeavor. There will also be special
music appropriate to the occasion,
by the choir.
Mrs. Geo. Budd has been IN
Milwaukee this week, in attend
ance at the grand chapter, order of
the Eastern Star. Mrs. Budd is a
permanent member of the grand
chapter bv virtue of being past
worthy grand matron. This is her
fifteenth year of regular attendance
at the grand chapter.
Deputy Sheriff Elwell was in
Cassville the first of the week for
the purpose of serving papers on
John Habermann and VIM. Grimm,
of that place, charging the two men
with violation of the state Sunday
closing law. The latter was taken
to Platteville but the former was
unable to have his hearing on &C.
count of illness. There is said TO
be much speculation in Cassville
and vicinity as to where the COM
plant originated.
"A very pleasant card party was
given by the ladies of st. Clements
church, at the city hall, Wednesday
evening, devoted to progressive
cinch on the part of the older play
ers and finch by the younger ones
C1nch prizes awarded were: head
prizes to Mrs. Geo. Rudersdorf and
Chas. Ray; consolation prizes to
Mrs. Pat May and Henry Carroll.
In the finch games first prize was
awarded to Barbara Casper and
consolation prize to Harry Daley.
Al admission of 25 cents was charg-
ed, netting about $25, which will be
devoted to the improvement of the
Catholic cemetery.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1908-02-22

The Sole and Foodless SURVIVOR
wonder if my doctor would advise me
to continue taking these appetite bit
tiers every three hours, or should l
throw them to the sharks 2-Sketch.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
Lou Fowler Dead.

Word has been received here of
the death of Louis N. Fowler, for
mer resident of this county, which
occurred last month ut the residence
of his sister-in-law, Miss Ada G. San
derson, In England.
In the early days Mr.. Fowler had u
claim on the south branch of upper
White (where Windermere Lodge is
now located) and when Rio Blanco
county was cut off from Garfield he
was the first elective county surveyor,
civil engineering being his chief oc-
cupation. A few years later he left
this section and went to the southern
part Of old Mexico where he followed
his profession with big syndicate.
Later found him In the midst Of the
Boer war in Africa, and he went
through the memorable siege OF
Ladysmith. Mr.. Fowler had many
friends here and was well thought Of.
and all the old-timers will be panied
to learn OF his passing away.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Tickling, tight coughs, can besure-
ly and quickly loosened with pre-
scription druggists are dispensing
everywhere as DR. Shoop's Cough
Remedy. And 1t is so very, very diff
ferent than common cough medicines
No opium, no chloroform, absolutely
nothing harsh or unsafe. The ten
der leaves Of harmless, lung heal
Ing mountainous shrub, gives the
curative properties to DR.. Shoop's
Cough Remedy. Those leaves have
the power to calm the most distress
sing cough and to soothe and heal
the most sensitive bronchial MEM
brane. mothers should, for safety's
sake alone, always demand DR..
Shops. 1t can with perfect free
dom be given to even the youngest
babes. Test 1t yourself, and see.
Sold by the Meeker Drug company.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Governor johnson, of Minnesota,
looks like rising sun. A Democrat
who can carry his state three times
In succession In the face of normal
Republican majority of 100000 is
marked for a man of destiny. Per-
haps he will be the Moses that will
lead the agricultural constituencies
of the northwest out of the wilder
ness of protectionistic and trust
breeding Republicanism in which
they have been blindly wandering
for nearly forty years. In any event
Governor Johnson is we'll worth
keeping an eye on.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
TO THE srANDIsH.

(Denver Daily Hotel Bulletin.)
Myles stsndish, the Captain of Plymouth,
/ That doughty old warrior so bold,
Now sleeps with the Puritan fathers;
His story you've often been told.
OF his great deeds Of daring. and valor,
HIS lights with his Indian foe.
And his many battles in Flanders;
OF these, of course, you know.
But with all his boldness and courage,
OF one thing, was Myles standish afraid,
For he trembled and shook in the presence
OF Priscilla, the Puritan maid.
His love for the Puritan maiden,
OF his innermost soul was part,
But when 1t came to proposing;
On this errand John Alden must start.
"For you are young" tsaid the soldier)
"And clever with tongue or with pen.
While I'm but rugged old warrior,
Only used to dealing with men,"
Now John Alden, his scribe and his penman.
Carried also, within his brave heart,
Great love for the maiden Priscilla;
He, too, had felt Cupids dart.
In vain did John Alden remind him
OF the words he'd 80 often repeat,
About serving ones self, to be well served; :"
From his errand, there seemed no retreat.
You know the rest Of this wooing,
For in spite Of his power and pelf.
His fears were Myles standish's undoing.
John Alden did speak-for himself.
Myles standish had learned well his lesson,
30 in dealing with man or with maid
Thereafter, he spoke out quite boldly,
To ''blow his own horn" not afraid.
So now the 18th of November
Twill require no wizard or elf
To know, that in beautiful Denver,
"The Standish" will speak for itself.
Good service, forever its motto,
Fair dealing, shall be its keynote.
With its "Three bowls and cockerel RAM
pant"
Full proudly its banner shall float.
Respectfully dedicated to Denver's newest
and best, .'The Standtsh."
MARY W. STRONG.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Sam Dntton Of the Albany hotel,
Denver, was christened prince of
the Italian Garden" at the opening
of that portion Of his house few
nights ago. 1t don't matter so much
about the Italian garden part Of the
affair, but the title Of ''prince" fits
ME- Dutton to . nicety. He was
generally recognised as one long be-
fore the title was formally conferred.
-4sOudAha Daily Aspeetss.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
Seven Years Of Proof.

~ have had seven years OF proof
that DR. Kings New Discovery is the
best medicine to take for coughs and
colds and for every diseased condi-
tion of throat, chest or lungs" says
w v Henry, Of Panama, Mo. The
world has had thirty-eight years Of
proof that DIR Kings New Discovery
is the best remedy for coughs and
colds, la grippe, asthma, hay fever,
bronchitis, hemorrhage of the lungs,
and the early stages Of consumption.
It's timely use always prevents the
development of pneumonia. Sold
under guarantee at Meeker Drug
store. 5Oc and 81. Trial bottle free.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
How Is Your Digestion.

Mrs Mary Bowling Of No 228 9th
ave, San Fsncisco, recommends .
remedy for stomach trouble. She
says: Gratitude for the wonderful
effect of Electric Bitters iu a case of
acute indigestion, prompts this testi-
monial. 1 am fully convinced that
for stomach and liver troubles Elec-
trio Bitters Is the best remedy on the
market to-day" This great tonic
and Alternative medicine invigorates
the system, purifles the blood and Is
especially helpful lin all forms Of
female weakness. Soc at Meeker
Drug company store.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

8 R Berger, the well-known eye
specialist, will be In Meeker again
for three days, November 26, q and
%. He is Thoroughly equipped with
all Modern and scientific instruments
known to optical science. Those
who need their eyes tested and
glasses fitted are advised to consult
this eminent specialist. He makes
no charge for consultation.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

1t isn't SO difficYt to strengthen =
weak stomach il one goes at 1t cor
rectly. The old fashioned way Of
dosing the stomach or stimulating
the heart or kidneys is surely wrong!
DR.. Shoop first pointed out this error.
go to the weak or ailing nerves of
organs" said he. Each inside organ
has its controlling or ''inside nerve"
When these nerves fail then those
organs must surely falter. This
vital truth is leading druggists every
where to dispense and recommend
DR.. Shoop's Restorative. A few days
test will surely tell! Sold by the
Meeker Drug company.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Last Tuesday, November 18th, Dem
yer celebrated. the fiftieth anniver-
sary Of its birth In appropriate man.
ner. Denver is great and beautiful
city to-day, but the imagination can
hardly picture what much greater
and more beautiful city it will be
fifty years hence.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

A Glenwood dispatch of November
18th says: Bishop Edward Jennings
Knight Of the Episcopal diocese Of
western Colorado died this morning
at O'Clock from typhoid fever, re-
cent overwork and exposure having
placed him where he was unable to
successfully cope with the malady.
He is survived by wife and two
children, the latter being In school In
the east. Mrs. Knight was at her
husba nd's bedside when the end
came.
Bishop knight was born In Phila-
delphia November IL, 1884, and after
graduating from school engaged In
the banking business for three years.
He began studying for the ministry
and graduated from the General
Theological seminary In 1887. At the
same time he received degree of D.
d. from Columbia college.
His first and. only charge was
Christ church at Camden, N. j.,
where he remained for fifteen years.
During this time he established what
is known as the Associated missions,
the center of missionary work for
New Jersey. 1t was here, too, that
he did great deal of work among
prisoners. He was ordained bishop
at this church December 10. 1907, and
on January Sd last assumed charge
of the western, district of Colorado.
His territory embraced the entire
western part of Colorado, and fire.
quent journeys by stage and on
horseback, in all sorts of weather.
combined with vast amount Of
work, brought about his illness q
month ago.
He was quite popular throughout
the district and in demand as .
speaker.
Bishop spalding and those Of the
clergy who could attend officiated at
services at Glenwood. Tuesday after
noon prior to departure Of the re-
mains for Trenton, N. j., where in
terment takes place.
Bishop Knight was an able and
eloquent speaker and very popular
within and without the church. His
untimely end is deplored by all. -
Memorial services will be held at
st. James church at IL .. m to-mor.
row. -
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Our old friend Vic Wilson, of Yam
pa fame, must have "queered" things
for the G. o. p. In Grand county. For
the first time in the history Of that
old county the Democrats have cleo
ted every candidate on the county,
district and state tickets. Vic evil
IDENTIFY failed to kill off all the ''in-
sects" in Grand.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Read the plain formula on q box
of Pink Pain Tablets. Then ask your
doctor II there ia better one. Pain
means congestion = blood pressure
somewhere. DR.. Shoop's Pink Pain
Tablets check head pains, womanly
pains, pain anywhere. Try one, and
see! % for CSC. Sold by Meeker
Drug company.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

W.T. Kisinger, who came In from
Rifle yesterday, reports the Meeker-
Rifle road fully recovered from the
effects of the October storm.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Barney Napier carried all three of
the counties in the twenty-flrs dis
trict-Garfield and Eagle by big ma
jorities-which shows that Mr.. Ma
pier was the right man to nominate
for this important position.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

. A clergyman writes:- "Preventics,
those little Candy Cold Cure Tablets
are working wonders in my parish" :"
Preventics surely will check cold,
or the Grippe. in very few hours.
And Preventics are safe and harm
less. No quinine, nothing harsh or
sickening. Fine for feverish restless
children. Box Of 4S at sc. Sold by
the Meeker Drug company.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

oTRAYED-About three thou
- sand boxes of Bromo Febrin
for colds and la grippe. No re-
ward offered; no use; people who
tried It will never part with 1t.
For sale at the City Drug Store.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Messrs Barnes, Lewis and Queen
were among the Angoraites in town
during the week.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
sR, COLO, SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 81, 1908.

The Hugus company commenced
the erection Of another commodious
warehouse this week. Clarence Ford
IL the master mechanic In charge Of
the work,
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Mrs. Keller and Mrs. Legg Of Oak
ridge park visited town friends
Wednesday.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21
Coming Again to Meeker

8 r Berger, the Leadville eye
specialist, announces that he will be
at the Meeker Hotel for three days,
November 38, u and q, Thursday,
Friday and Saturday.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Henry Genier was among the up
river people who visited the metro
polls during the week.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Regular White river weather again
days and cool nights.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Mr. and Mrs J w c Shepherd came
down from Buford Thursday.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Bromo- Febrin IN tho best remedy
for a cold on the market For sale
at Strehlka's CITY Drug Store.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Rubs Ball is attending to business
at Glenwood this week.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

John Cary carried every county in
his senatorial district-Routt Eagle,
Grand and Summit, and his majority
will foot up 1000. =
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

o. L. Dudley Of Pioeancs was {,
town visitor Monday. i
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

A sermon that is long drawn out
10 naturally narrow.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Re.d THE HERALD for the news.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

Occasionally you see a woman's
hat that really looks like one.
The Meeker herald., 1908-11-21

R. H. Taylor, dentist, Meeker.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1908-10-24

wouia you ss vlsasus vnas yov vat whsa . sge ad night sss its