The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1908-06-19
Fixing him with your eye

concluded I'd teach EN- a lesson f
learned long ago, but never put in prac--
tice. I sent and got piece Of liver
and put it near the dog. The feas all
hoped onto it and stuck. Just az l
was getting ready to throw it in the
fire l turned my back moment and
the dog ate the liver, fleas and all.
Now, he's feas lined"
But about the Dog 0rotto. Well, it's
filled with carbonic acid gas, and for
generations guides have made money
out of tourists by showing some poor
little canine into the cave and keep
ing him there until his legs began to
totter and his head to whirl, when
they would haul him out and souse
him in the nearby lake until he re-
vived; and revive he must, for was
there not another tourists carriage
coming down the hill? But sometimes
doggie didn't revive. Well, he was
only a dog, and there had been in
stances where men had persisted in the
foul-smelling cave. But that was ages
ago. There was French king who
brought donkey to the grotto and
tried the effect of the gas on him. The
animal died. But why the king tried it
on a donkey don't know, unless that
a fellow-feeling makes us-but, no-I
won't. Then there was an early Span
ish viceroy who wanted to decide
whether the gas was in prime condi-
ton or not so he put two of his slaves
in the cave and they were brought out
dead Spoke we'll for the gas, at any
rate.
Nowadays the question as to the
| virtue of the gas is more humanely
| settled. The guide takes a burning
torch and plunges it into the cave
Instantly it goes OUT. But if the act is
| repeated several times the gas, i'm
| pregnated with smoke, assumes the
| appearance of silver sea, flowing in
| ripping waves against the black wall
of the cavern A good story is told
Of the guides of that region. AS a mat
ter of fact they are wholly unreliable,
| with their high-sounding names O;
this broken wall or that defaced in
| scription.
1t is said that they keep little dog
| which they offer up as a saclxdce on
the altar of the tourists curiosity.
Shall throw him in?' they sill
ask the visitor; and if he be of a hi.
| name disposition he will quickly re-
| ply, certainly not! What d. you think
l ann"
And the guide will say-making 4
shrewd guess-"l teenk you are Ameri-
can. Englees he say, 'Yaas, bah
Jove, t'row leetle beggar een!"
| But once there came along an
American, whom the guide took to be
English, and when he asked, Shall l
t'row leetle beggar een?'' the Ameri.
can replied:
IF you do, I'll throw your do car
cass in after him."
The thing to do while at Naples is
to 60 to the pink coral grotto, 50 to
the pink coral grotto We went. 1t lies
between the Bay of Pozzuoli and that
special little bay where Pliny kept his
navy. We went out in boat with
four rowers, the chief of whom gave
US large punches Of taffy about our
country-"beeyuteeful America fine
New York." etc.-he had travelled, oh,
yes! he had been to Jlblater (Gibral.
tar) and to Acknowledgements
country!" etc., until it came time to
return, when the fellow demanded
that we pay them q franc each then
and there, instead Of the equivalent of
ten cents each on the return to the
shore. Upon refusal he worked him.
self up into hysterical sort of
paroxysm, and shrieked: mo! not
shore! In de boat! In de boat! But my
American nerve rose to the occasion
and l fatty refused, Notwithstanding
that the situation began to get
strained, to put it mildly. Sulkily he
gave in, and gave the command to re.
turn to land, and slowly We were pro-
pelled-so slowly, indeed, that I had
serious misgivings that We were to
spend the night upon the darkening
sea, while the muttered abuse of our
Countrywide country-people vii
lains-dirty New York-America all
thieves!"-made me long to knock the
rascal overheard and have done with
him. However. as we approached the
shore they became more civil and, as
we alighted-glad to be back with q
whole skin-they bowed and scraped
cap in hand, begging for settlement
at once. But no, the game was now in
my hand, and marching up to the ho
tel demanded of the manager how Il
was that he sent his guests out with
a parcel of rascals and extortiolists
terrifying hapless foreigners ard in
dulging in foul abuse of their country
etc., etc. He rolled his eyes t.
heaven and protested that he knew
nothing Of such methods; they were
honest fellows, and hard-Working, and
by the Madonna and all the saints! he
had no knowledge OF such iniqLities
it was incredible, impossible! etc., etc
| "Here!" said l. here 10 your money
according to the agreement l made
with you. I will pay no extra extor
ton, nor be terrified into doing 80
And, furthermore for the protection O.
my countrymen, will publish far ant
wide, will print in every newspaper
of America the name of your hotel ant
the rascally doings of your EN-
ployes-'
got no further, for the fellow, witt
a howl of anguish, fell upon his knees
and with clasped hands implored me
not to put it in de parer-not to ruiz
hem!-hees famlee, dey starve: Ok
not put in de paper!"
Il SunnreSsing the laughter which hi