Nome industrial worker., 1908-10-02

"I see," said the man from Missouri, that there is lot of hard times still on the outside"
 Not for long, said the Roosevelt Republican. "They'vc got q Prosperity League in St. Louis, and soon we'll have all the soup kitchens with signs .'ro Rent after Taft is elected"
 And may l inquire" said the man from Missouri. whats this prosperity league that you talk about?"
 Well, sir said the R. R., tits like this: One Hugo Munsterberg, who testified that when Orchard lied in the Boise trials he was speaking the truth from the professors psychological Standpoint-he has discovered that the cause of the panic is that the people have SO much money that they are afraid to spend any of it. and the league is established to separate these hoarders from their wad.''
 That's a great idea. great idea" said the man from Missouri. "and it reminds me of a smart guy l used to snow in Missouri some years back.
 "rll tell you about it." said the man from Missouri, as he drew his seat was Lucullus John Smith He came tround my home town of Mudville
 when the last panic was on. and he opened up hall where he delivered
 lectures on panics, prosperity and free silver. He had with him a trained monkey that used to liven up the lec- lures With his antics. Now. Smith ,harged no fee for admission to his hall but at the close of his discourse 1e peddled pale pills for pink people at twenty dollars per bottle Don't run away with the notion that Lucullus was nature fakr His pills were not warranted to purge the blood, purify the liver, tone up the system nor helI make men as strong as Jiujitsu, the Jap wrestler. No. sir. He called hi: pills prosperity pills and he guaran- teed that one bottle would fix up th' finances of any one partaking of 1t and two bottles would restore prosperity to the bankrupt bum. We'll sir, he sold a mighty lot of them pills to the local magnates who were affected b. the financial depression that struck Mudville as we'll as the other great centers of American industry. Smith produced testimonials from Rockefel- Ter, Carnegie, Sam Gompers and Bishop Potter. He had character from Mark Hanna and reference zens, and sa;l that the effects of the medicine was wonderful. Why, Mug gins, that ran tt. Mudv1'n Emporium startled tie ci...Cns by rainting the store rel white and blue, same as 1t used to be in the good old times. "The great drawback, of course, was that prosperity pills was so dear. Twenty dollars was a heap of money for poor man to pay for goods. and needed the pills most. However, Lu- cullus was a reasonable gent, and he stated to us that if assistance was given him to build factory he could make the pills sight cheaper. So a company was started and money came pouring into Mudville to construct the business. Smith used to stroll around and pomt to the building going up as a proof of the value of prosperity pills
 Ut is pity that factory never start ed to york;" and the man from Mis- souri spat in strenuous reminiscence at the stove.
 "How was that?" asked the Roose- welt Republican,
 The man from Missouri pulled him. self together with an effort.
 "It was a great loss to the world" he declared. You see, just before the last patent pill machine was installed all the remaining prosperity pills and ate the only copy of the prescription that Lucullus held Smith told a bunch of angry shareholders that 1t would take him 10 years more to work out the ingredients in his laboratory back East-there was 1921 of 'em, he said. The doctors and Democrat poli- ticians held post mortem on the monkey to try and find the receipt"