davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

a Poetic Comparison.

Y !
The poet was fayoring friendly
soul with his last verses, says q
writer In ST. James Budget The
verses were descriptive of beautiful
girl. The poet read:
Her hair was massed in flowing curls.
The color Of whisper.
This made the listener .sit up
What's that?" he said. Read that
again.
II thought you would say something
about that" the poet answered. y
don't want to appear egotistical, but
that little phrase gives some scope foE
the exercise Of the mind"
In what way?'
The poet laughed.
Don't you see,'' he said, chow beau
tifully that describes the shade Of her
hair? Every poet speaks Of golden
hair or raven locks. To be a success
one must be original Well, she did
not have golden hair. It was nearly
golden, and convey the impression
by means Of that one word.''
The other still looked puzzled.
'sYou have heard" said the poet pa
tiently, "that silence is golden?"
Eyes,. the other admitted.
"Well," resumed the poet, "if silence
is golden what would a whisper be?
It would be nearly golden, wouldn't
it?" .~a,~z
The poet laughed again. The other
was sitting down and cOuld not stag
ger, so he laughed too.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
: Indian BuriaIs,

The Indian method Of burial was to
fasten corpse upon cross sticks sup.
ported by poles in the ground or in the
boughs Of the treetops. Here the air
and the elements silently disposed Of
the lifeless clay until in a year or so
but little remained to bear evidence of
a tomb, perhaps some broken sticks
in the top and a few scattered beads
or human bones beneath the burial
place. I cannot conceive of anything
more pitifully grewsome than an In
dian burial ground Of this type. I
have seen them in the fall of the
year, when the winds were shaking
and swaying the platforms and wiring
ing the leafess trees, Haunting the
burial rags like signals of distress from
the dead and whistling through and
over the whitening bones and neglect.
ed remains of those who had many a
time withstood the tempest and storm
when the breath of life! stirred within
them.-Army and Navy Life.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Not Abashed.

when was young" said a lawyer,
my best client was a wealthy old
LADY noted for saying caustic things
about her acquaintance. One morn
ing, when was staying at her house,
she vilified one Of her neighbors,
named Stamford, without stint. II
! "By way Of changing the subject
I proposed to read to her from a
volume Of lectures had happened to
bring with me. She assented. start
ed at random and when too late dis
covered that I was in the middle of a
lecture on the government of the
tongue. H. -
II was afraid she would think 1. had
selected it to admonish her, yet
dared not stop for fear Of seeming to
make the offense more pointed. So on
I read to the end, pretty sure that my
reading would cost me client worth
two hundred year to me. But when
I ended she said:
"Thank you, Mr.. -. It is an ex
cellent lecture and would fit my neigh
Dor Stamford to a t."
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Pelican,

The pelican is not an attractive bird.
He offends both the eye and the nose.
But he is commercially regular in his
habits. The parent birds catch fish and
after eating their fill deposit the others
in their pouches under their bills and
carry them to their young. These
pouches will hold from three to eight
pounds Of fish. They are elastic and
when distended to their utmost nearly
touch the ground. When empty, the
pouch lies close up under the big bill
and is merely mass Of wrinkles. It IS
this pouch that gives the pelican his
characteristic and disagreeable odor
caused by particles of decaying fish
The pelican's legs are short and strong,
and its feet have large webs. It is not
a fast swimmer or rapid flier, but it
is practically tireless in both air and
water. On land it is awkward and un-
wie1dy
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Efficacy of PRAYER,


Among my esteemed neighbors there
Is family known for the piety of it's
members and their implicit confidence
In the efficacy Of prayer. One of the
daughters, Miss Kate B., has almost
reached the age when she could be re-
ferred to ungallantly as an old maid.
She Is the target for many a good ma
tured quip pertaining to her alleged
hopes and endeavors in the direction
of matrimony.
Not long ago a certain society of
young men which had interested itself
In a campaign for higher saloon license
sent committee to visit the homes Of
the district and obtain signatures to a
high license petition. When this COM
mittee, numbering half a dozen men,
bers, assembled the front steps at the
B. home my friends wife was the first
to see it through the front window.
flaws, Johnw she exclaimed to her
husband. "See all those young men
coming to visit u.s."
Mr.. B. glanced out Of the window,
noted the number Of the invading force
and remarked, with an air of convic-
ton:
'Humph! Rates been praying
again."-San Francisco Call.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Too Ma,lv Tronntiotfss.

The Following anecdote concerning
Donizetti and the score Of Rossini,e
'..Otello'' is told by the Musical World:
Donizetti had asked Sigismondi, the
director Of the Naples Conservatorie
to look over the score with him. and
the two sat down at table with the
work in front Of them. Presently 81
gismondi began to raye4ab bout its "mon.
strous orchestration." Terrible was
his indignation when he found that
clarinets, bassoons and trombones had
been employed in one place to swell q
crescendo, but when the fortissimo
was reached he uttered cry Of de
spair, struck the score violently with
his fist, upset the table and rushed
from the room, exclaiming: "a hundred
and twenty-three trombones! A hun
dred and twenty-three trombonesp'
Donizetti in vain tried to call him
back, shouting after him, mot 1923
trombones, but first, second and third
trombones." Sigismondi would not
listen and when last seen was still
repeating, "a hundred and twenty
three trombones!'
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
SLIDING Down a Cask.

One of the vintage ceremonies at
Klosterneuberg, the famous convent
which the Viennese visit annually on
st. Leopold's day, consists in sliding
down a giant cask of wine. The i'm
mense cask was first filled in the ia
nous wine year of I'LL. The origin
Of the sliding is found in story of a
cooper who was in the habit of return
ing home in merry condition. His
wife fetched him one day from the
village inn, and he attempted to hide
behind the cask. She seized a broom,
however, and with the help Of several
friends forced him to scramble up one
side and slide to the ground on the
opposite as punishment for his con-
duct.-London Mail.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Russian Women.

A Russian paid the following glow
ing tribute to the women of his ma
tive land: "The women of Russia COM
bine the vivacity and wit of the
Frenchwoman with the industry and
thrift for which the women Of Ger
many are famous. She is a superb
wife and mother and withal a fine
mental worker. The Russian girl stu.
dent is generally in the front rank at
the universities. Doubtless some of
her fine qualities are due to the fact
that in Russia women are free and
are in every respect considered to be
the equals of men. Russian women are
born politicians and diplomats and so
intensely patriotic that they esteem no
sacrifice too great for their country;
hence as revolutionists- however mis-
guided they are infinitely more daring
and devoted than the men. Secrets
have been wrung from male revolu-
tionaries by torture, but never from
the women
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

principal part of the road work
should be done by the state be-
cause it is the party substantially
benefited. Little dabs of three
or four hundred dollars per town
ship per annum is of no avail in
the work that the state should
do in the matter of the develop
ment of its principal part-north-
ern Minnesota.
Uppermost and above all, if I
am elected, I will in season and
out of season, vote and strive for
substantial state aid for roads.
And l believe fully realize the
fight I am up against in that the
representation from the northern
part is meager compared with
the representation from the other
parts of the state. But the whole
legislature must be made to see
that the state roads are substan-
tial benefit to the whole state.
earnestly solicit your support.
Respectfully,
Henry Funkley.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
A Swift Bird.

The Mexican road runner has only
two short legs, but he can beat a
horse, hound and an electric carriage
and give them handicap start. Speed
Is not his only recommendation. He
eats as he runs, or, rather, as the
things run away with him. Snakes
are the principal part Of his diet, big
and little. His crop is as elastic as his
legs are swift, and when he wants to
prepare for long journey he coils up
a RATHER or two inside Of his neck and
sets out across the Mexican desert
with a swiftness that makes it look
like bunch Of dust on a record break.
Ing tour around the world.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Greatest General.

All things duly considered, the great
est general of whom we have any
knowledge was in all probability the
Carthaginian. Hannibal. All the in
formation we have of Hannibal comes
from his enemies, and yet what
achievements they were forced to cred
1t him with! The second Punic war
the most brilliant in history-was prac-
tically one man against a whole ma
ton, and that the strongest then
known. With the army that he had
nodded out of raw and barbarous
levies Hannibal had to fight a nation
OF the stoutest and best trained war.
riors Of ancient times, and he had to
do this without any assistance from
home. It has been we'll said that there
is nowhere else an example Of what q
single man Of genius may achieve
against the most tremendous Odds
New York American.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
CannibaI Japs.

Young lieutenant Marlinspike's
bathing suit revealed on his right arm
an Uncle Sam and on his left pea
cock, while around his neck a gleam-
ing serpent was coiled, the mouth
holding it's tail. "
'"This is Japanese tattooing,'' the
lieutenant said proudly, "Nagasakl
work l was under the needle nine
teen hours in ALL My two tattooers
drank quite a pint of my blood.
Jap tattooers are all blood drinkers.
They like it. They get to like it in
the end as you or like tobacco.
"You see, as they work the blood
wells forth. It flows over the design
and then, very carefully, without
smearing the wet ink, they lick the
blood up delicately with the tongue.
Every Jap tattooer as he picks and
picks away at you bends down every
few minutes and ticks the little rising
tide Of blood away.
IF he is seasoned -tattoer he swal-
lows the blood. He likes it, he says"
New Orleans Times-Democrat.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Actress Retort.

Georgette Leblanc, the actress. wife
Of Maurice Maeterlinek, was on tour
in French town, where the local COM
pany supported her in one of her
husbands plays. .....
= But the support was weak and halt
ing. The poets lines were mangled,
and several characters seemed unable
to understand what they were saying.
Nine. Leblanc sought out her man.
ager and spoke to him. go.
"A writer like Maeterlinck should be
treated with more respect"
Madame he answered, IN. Maeter.
~linck is not the first to suffer. So.
phocles, Moliere, Racine, Shakespeare
Goethe and other great dramatists are
daily murdered in the same way"
Possibly, but they are not murdered
alive, at any rate"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
might starve, but could not sponge"
Marion Harland's "Complete Ell
nllotto
Starting Early.

Wangles was married recently, and
there was regular hail of rice, con-
feti and old shoes for good luck as he
got into the cab. Moreover, on turn
ing round he was struck above the
eye by friendly shoe with rather a
heavy heel.
AS the cab Immediately drove away
no notice was taken Of the accident,
and, despite the large handkerchief
tied by his sobbing bride over his in
jured optic, the blood still flowed down
Wangles' face.
When they arrived at their destina-
ton the newly created Benedict went
out to doctor to get the bleeding
stopped.
"How did you come by this, my
MANI"
"Well, you see, doctor-aw-I got
married this morning, and"- COM
menced Wangles, when the doctor
broke in:
what! Has she started already?'-
London Answers.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

Eaety.-SyrCs.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Carrot PUDDING.

One cupful Of grated carrots, one
cupful of grated potatoes, one cupfu]
Of sugar, one cupful of flour, one-hal1
cupful Of raisins and currants mixed
two teaspoonfuls Of all kinds of spice
mixed, one teaspoonful Of soda, one
teaspoonful Of salt. Mix all together
and steam for three hours. Grease 8
small pail and put the dough in it.
Set the pail in a kettle Of boiling wa.
ter, keeping the water well up near
the top of the pail. Cover kettle over
SO all the steam may be kept in as
much as possible.-Boston Post.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Color Of Jade.

The idea of jade possessing the vir
tue of bringing the wearer food for
tune arose in China, where the stone
Is so valued that the finding Of a par
ticularly fine piece causes the state to
take possession Of the land where it
was found. The best specimens rep
resent all the hues and effects Of sea
foam, but these are eagerly snapped
up by collectors and seldom come into
the public market. There is another
cause for the popularity of jade. Its
peculiar green .tinge has the effect Of
making the human skin look very
white. In this connection the quality
OF the stone is of no account so long
as the color is there. Indeed, many
OF the less expensive jade ornaments
are made from chips Of the stone
which contain noticeable faws.-Pear-
sons.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
CircumstantiaI Evidence.

"You say you met the defendant on
a street car and that he had been
drinking and gambling" said the at
torney for the defense during the cross
examination.
YES" replied the witness. e.
did you see him take drink p
'No."
did you see him gambling?"
"No."
"Then how do you know" demanded
the attorney, that the defendant had
been drinking and gamblingY
"Wel," explained the Witness, "he
gave the conductor blue chip for his
car fare and told him to keep the
change. "-Lippincott's Magazine.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Clean Food.

It is good deal more important that
food shall not carry the germs of dis
ease than that it shall be chemically
pure. Table salt, for example, may
contain some soda salts other than the
chloride and still be perfectly health.
full. Corn bread is less healthful when
made from pure cornmeal than when it
has some admixture of wheat -four.
But food that is not clean may be
more dangerous than any adulterated
food product sold today, provided the
adulterated article carries no disease
germs.-Boston Advertiser.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Conference.

'This is grave matter" began the
undertaken.
consequently we want more light
thrown upon it," remarked the lamp
manufacturer.
II hope our views will all be in har-
mony with the OCCASION" put in the
piano maker.
mo pipe Dreams" admonished the
plumber.
Il hope whatever is said none will
take it ILL.," said the doctor.
'Then We'll all be good natured and
not ask cross questions" supplemented
the lawyer.
But it was the remark of the bakez
which broke up the meeting.
"What want to know, first of all,''
he declared, ''is who is expected to sup
ply the dough ?'-Baltimor American.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Notice to Public.

All parties who sat for pictures
in my studio during the past two
weeks, or had photographs in the
studio previous to the fire, are re-
quested to call on me or correspond
with me regarding same.
IN. L. Hakkerup.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Oruan,

Like most important Inventions, that
of the organ is yelled in mystery. The
invention Of the organ has been attrib-
uted to Ctesibius, barber Of Alex
andria, about $50 B. c.; also to the
celebrated Arehimedes, 22O B. G. It
is certain that the organ, was brought
to Europe from the eastern or Greek
empire and was applied to religious
devotions in churches about A. D. $50
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
How Frozen Insects Revive,

Experiments in reviving frozen in
sects by a naturalist show some sur
prising results. A large cecropia moth,
frozen in the center Of a SNOWFALL
until it was perfectly brittle, revived
In twenty seconds when held near a
stove. Several newly Matched 10 moths
revived in similar manner after being
frozen stiff and then thawed out. Sim
liar experiments with ants, butterflies
and house flies gave the same results.
But the naturalist noticed that recent
~ Matched insects resist cold better
than older ones.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
A Lucky Horseshoe.

The Australians when they find a
horseshoe throw it over their shoulder.
A lady in Sydney found one and threw
it gracefully over her shoulder. It
went through a hatter's window and
hit a customer who was trying on a
new hat. This gentleman, under the
impression that one of the shopmen in
a At Of temporary insanity had played
the trick, promptly struck him and
sent him through the plate glass win.
dow. A general melee ensued, although
on consideration nobody knew what 1t
was all about.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Out Of the Hymnbook,

A minister, having given out his mo
tices," was about to read his hymn
when he was reminded Of one notice
he had forgotten. Stopping, he made
this announcement, apologizing for his
forgetfulness. Then, much to the
amusement Of his audience, he began
to line out the hymn as follows:
"Lord, what thoughtless wretch
am I?"-Judge's Library.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
BURNING Wood,

Wood crackles when it is ignited be-
cause the air expanded by heat forces
Its way through the pores Of the wood
with cracking noise. Green wood
makes less swapping than dry because
the pores contain less air, being filed
with sap and moisture, which extin-
guish the fame, whereas the pores of
dry wood are filed with air, which
supports combustion.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Vicarious Oscillation

He was having some words with her
chaperon.
"Pll-I'll kiss her right under your
nose!' he said defiantly.
"Oh, WE'LL" said that lady, "vica-
rious kissing like that I can see no
objection to."-Boston Transcript.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
To Simplify EnoIish

It is the vowels which are the great
difficulty of English pronunciation.
We want our vowel sounds standard
tied for us-all the RECOMMENDATIONS,
with the correct intonations, set down
for us in some Ineligible and easily
understood form.-Country Life.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

Troilope's Recipe For Novel Writing.
Mr.. Trollope wrote immensely and
never waited for inspiration. He said
the best recipe he knew for novel writ
Ing was patch Of cobbler's wax on
his chair and to take great care he sat
on tt Leaves From Life"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
An Unwritten Law.

The smaller man bristled up.
See here" he growled, "you have
applied two unpleasant terms to me-"
Then he paused and scowled and came
a little closer. II just want you to
understand that third term doesn't
go in this country" -.
Whereupon the big man drew back
little and said no more.-Cleveland
Plain Dealer. --~-'-
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Widower.

A wfdower is like baby. The first
six months he cries a lot, the second
six months he begins to sit up and
take notice, and he experiences great
difficulty in getting through his second
year alone.-New Orleans Times-Dem-
ocrat
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

FOR RENT-Two furnished rooms.
Inquire 719 Beltrami Ave.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Symnahx.

A kind hearted little slum girl on a
visit to the country saw one evening
a mother hen about to gather her
brood Of chicks under her wings. The
little girl rushed up to the hen and
shouted:
"Shoo, you ugly thing! How dare
you sit down on these beautiful little
birds?"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Tho Unappreciatjve Londoner.

London is a marvel. But we Lon.
doners do not wax passionate over tta
qualities as the enthusiastic French.
man does over his Paris. There is
more beauty, more charm, more
wealth, more n culture and more art
to be found in London than anywhere
In the world, and we stolid English
people do not really appreciate IT.
London Graphic. .<~s.,---.-. .
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
The Genius,

Mark Twain said Of genius at
New York banquet: +
"A genius, as an old lady in Hanni-
bal once explained to me, is man
what knows more'n he can find out
and spills vittels on his clothes"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Posted Him.

He (vainly)-See that sweet little girl
In pink? I was engaged to her the
whole Of last summer. Stranger eager
ly)-Very glad to hear it. I am the
lawyer she's commissioned to sue you
for breach of promise. -
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17

Newed-My wife has a habit of tax
ing money from my pockets when I'm
asleep. Oldwed-Mine used to do that,
100, but she doesn't any mo4e Newed
How do you prevent It? Oldwed-I
spend every cent have before go
home.-Chicago News.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
.Willind to Tell.

Willing to Tell.
"One-half the world doesn't know
how the other half lives" declared a
notorious lady gossip.
"That isn't your fault" quietly OBJ
served one Of her auditors.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Hunters License.

County Auditor Wilmann today
received 500 hunters licenses. which
he will deal out to 81 per to all who
care to hunt this fall.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
lusfX.

=. -.-s lusty. -.7.. f.... -..'
Shopkeeper-1s there anything else
can send you, sir? What would you
say to piece Of this cheese? Custom
er-1 wouldn't care to say anything
to it. It might answer me back.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
His Was Hers.

His Was Hers. y.
II heard him behind the door plead
ing for just one. They must be en-
gagged ~
Nav, they're married. It was a
dollar he was pleading for."-Louis-
vile Courier-J Journal. "
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Located at Last.

Drummer (settling bill in Eagle
House. Hayfeld)-Pardon my curiosi-
ty, sir, but what do you stuff your
beds with in this hotel? Landlord
proudly)-Best straw to be had in this
hull county, b'gosh! Drummer-Ah!
That is very interesting. know now
where the straw came from that broke
the camel's back!-Puck. 49,,
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1908-08-17
Long and Short.

Farmer B.This ERE paper says they
amt nothin' fr an appetite like long
tramp. His WifeLand! They don't
know what they're talkin' about A
short one en- sat just e. much. Path
lndee.