The Cairo bulletin., 1908-09-12
CAUSED A RUMpUs
STORY OF ONE SMALL DOG AND
ONE UMBRELLA
Mrs. Mcintosh's AbsentM lnoeuhesS
and puppy's Ability for Making
Trouble Sadly Disturbed the
Peaceful Congre cation.

| We had a little excitement Ill our
! church few Sundays ago. Mrs We
lntosh Is remarkable for her singular
| absence Of mind DR. Potts, the preach'
or, was reading from the Scriptures
| the account of the deluge. and Wheh
he came TO the story of how 1t ralned
for so many days and nights Mrs, Me
lntosh became so deeply absorbed In
the narrative and so strongly I'M
pressed with 1t that she involuntarily
put up her umbrella and held 1t over
her head AS she sat in the pew.
Mrs. Butterwick, who sits in the
next pew in front, always brings her
dog TO church with her and when Mrs
Mcintosh suddenly raised her umbrei'
la the action affected the sensibilities
of Mrs Butterwicks dog in such
manner that he began to bark furious
~. Then the sexton came in and tried
to remove the animal. but 1t lodged
into a vacant pew on the other side OF
the aisle and defed him, barking all
the time most vociferously,
Then the sexton became indignant
and flung a hymn book at the dog;
whereupon the dog flew out and Bit
him on the leg. The hubbub in the
church was by this time, of course,
something simply dreadful Not only
was the story of the deluge interrupt
ed. but the wicked boys in the gallery
actually "sicked' the dog at the sex
e., on iAXr
exceedingly.
Then Deacon Jones came after the
dog with his walking stick; whereupon
the animal actually dashed toward the
pulpit, and ran up the steps In such
fierce manner that DR.. Potts all at
once mounted on the chair to get ont
of the way of the beast, and he said
that If this disEraceful scene did not
soon come to an end he should dismiss
the congregation. Then Deacon Jones
crept up the steps, aud after short
struggle he seized the dog by the hind
leg and walked down the aisle with
him, the dog meanwhile yelping with
supernatural energy.
Mrs. Mcintosh turned around to
watch the retreatiug deacon. and as
she did SO she permitted her umbrella
TO droop over so that the end of one Of
the ribs caught in Mrs. Butterwick's
bonnet A minute later, when she
Strengthened up the umbrella, the bon
net was wrenehed off and hung dang
ling from the umbrella Mrs Butter.
wick had become exceedingly warm
at any rate. over the onslaught made
against her dog. but when Mrs Mcln.
tosh removed her bonnet she fairly
boiled over and. turning around white
with rage she screamed:
What did you grab that bonnet for,
you greeu.eyed catamount? Amt You
made enough fuss In this yer taber. |
nacle to-day skeering a poor, innocent |
dog. without snatching off such bon
nets as the likes of you can't afford to |
wear, no matter how crazy you are
you red-headed mnatic you. You let |
my bonnets alone, or I'll warm you /
with this parasol, even If it Is in meet. |
ing, now mind met"
men MIS-. MCiulOSH SttHltu 10 fpd- !
lie that her umbrella made her con
spicuous, SO she furled it and conclud-
ed to go home. And as she stepped
into the aisle Mrs. Butterworth gave
her this parting salute;
"Sneaking off before Tie collection.
too. You'd better spend less for jew
elry and give more to the poor heath.
en-, if you don't want to ketch 1t here
after"
Then she began TO fan herself furi.
ously, aud as things became calmer
Dr. Potts resumed the story Of the
food
Mrs Mcintosh has moved into a
back pew and because the deacons re
iuested Mrs Butterworth TO leave her
log at home she has seeded from the
presbyterians. and she now declares
hat the Lutheran faith is the only re-
igion for hen. Y. Woody.