The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1908-01-05

"A little out of my line" said Per-
kins. Just a little out of my line,
but I'll take the job. Premise you won't
shuttle off for thirty days. and if
can't do anything I'll never smile
again.
ooh, as for that" said Sawyer with
pathetic resignation. IN hold on for a
month longer if you wish it, but ii will
do US no good"
"All right" Perkins said, its bar
gain. And now where can I sec that
insane parent of yours?"
Say" said Perkins, as he came into
the Office the next day. I've been to
see that young mans old man."
"Well?" l asked, but without fear of
drawing an answer unfavorable to the
hopes of young Sawyer for Perkins
was beaming. He drew off his Patent
Self-Opening Gloves slowly.
Crazy he said at length. Crazy
as bug! Crazy as Perkins the Great
Case of Ted-hot mOnOmania. Bump of
inventiveness swe1ed to the size of
quart cup. Hopeless case"
Ny face must have fallen, for Perkins
leaned over and Datted me on the
shoulder.
Bats in his belfTy. Slang term, but
appropriate. What? People object to
bats in belfrys. Why? Because value
less. Good, Old Sawyer considered
crazy because his belfry is full of val
useless bats. What's the cure. Give the
bats value, give them a market quo
cation, sell them. make people cry for
them! Result-Old Sawyer not crazy
a genius,"
Il see" said. You think his in
vention has value-at least a market
value, and you are going to"
ADVERTISED" cried Perkins. "Adver-
tlse the old man sane again. Advertise
two fond hearts to beat as one. Ad-
Vertise joy into that sad-eyed kid"
But" l asked, lis the elder Saw
yers invention of any practical san
ity? What is his special mania ?"
Perkins ran his fingers through his
hair and waved his hands broadly.
Greatest thing in the world!' he
exclaimed. Revolutionary, scientific
dlseovery-immense value to the world
Grandest conception of the human
pie. too! Nothing but hot air.
Hot airi" I gasped
Hot air. Perkins assured me. Every
hot air. Wonderfully hot air. Red-hot
air. Say. Take a pail of water. Cool
il. 1t shrinks. Cool it again. 1t
shrinks. Freeze it. 1t expands. Mo-
raj: Somewhere it stops going one way
ana begins going the other"
Very true ! admitted.
Take man." Perkins, said. Let
him get lost in a blizzard. First hour
ne gets cold. Second hour he gets cold
er. Third hour he begins to warm
again. Invariable experience
I had heard this many times. so /
nodded my head.
We'll, then" said Perkins trium-
Take air. Freeze it It gets
crisp. Freeze it more. 1t gets liquid.
Freeze it again. Then WHAT"
1T should become solid.' 1 suggested.
NONSENSE" Perkins assured me. 1T
begins going back. It gets warm.
Freeze it again-it gets red-hot''
What of it?" l inquired.
What of it," Perkins cried Think
Of your winter coal bill. Then think
of heating your house with red-hot
whole house for nothing-only expense
the first cost of putting in one of Saw
yers Patent Refrigerative Hot Air
COnverters. Think of locomotives and
steamships-bOilers ali heated by hot
air cOnvertorsI Think of baking bread,
ironing linen, melting metals-all with
not air. In five years nothing viii be
USED 10 supply heat but Sawyer's Pat
en- Refrigerative Hot Air Converter"
II sounds reasonable" l said, 'but
should think the air would have to be
pretty cold before it began to get
warm
Cold. exclaimed Perkins, II should
say so! The professor figures it will
nave to be eight thousand degrees be-
low zero before it even begins to warm
up and that for each additional thou
sand degrees below zero it win warm
up at the rate of one degree. say, how
cold is liquid air?"
| hadn't the slightest idea, but I haz-
arded guess of two thousand degrees
below zero
All rightr said Perkins. "Say il
is. When Il gets six Thousand degrees
colder 1t will begin to warm up. See?
Then when it is nine thousand below
zero, IL viii be only seven thousand
nine hundred and ninety-nine. when il
IS ten thousand below zero, ii win be
only seven thousand nine hundred and
ninety Eight below. And so on-one de- |
gree warmer for every thousand de-
srees colder. So when We get ii eight |
million one hundred thousand degrees
below 1t will be one hundred degrees
above. The professor calls it NEGATIVE
neat"
Il should Think I said rather doubt |
.ully, that it might be hard to reach |