The morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1899-1930, 1908-03-13
AF|NE SIGN LANGUAGE
Droll Incident In the Reign 0,
James |. Of England. \


Spantard and Hard Headed and
canny Old Scotch Butcher.
II ls said that King James I. on NJ
moving to London was waited upon BY
the Spanish ambassador, a man Of cru.
dition. but who had a crotchet In his
head that every country should have n
professor Of signs to teach him and tho
like Of him to understand ono another.
Tho ambassador was lamenting ono
day before the king this great dcsider.
atum throughout an Europe. when the
king said 10 him: "why. I have a pro.
fessor OF signs In tho northcrnmost col.
lcge In my dominions- viz, at Abcr.
deen-but II Is a great way on. perhaps
900 miles"
"were Il 10000 leagues on shall
sec him." said the ambassador. ''and
am determined to set out In two or
three days" The king saw he had com.
mitted himself and wrote or caused to
be written, to the University Of Aber-
deem. stating tho case and desiring the
professors to put him or some way or
make the best OF him. The ambassa.
dor arrived. was received with great
solemnlty. but soon began to inquire
which Of them had the honor TO be pro.
fessor Of signs.
Being told that the professor was
absent In the highlands and would 70.
turn nobody knew when. the ambas.
sador said. II will wait his return.
though II were twelve months"
Seeing that this would not do and
that they had to entertain him at n
great expense all tho while. they con.
trived stratagcm, There was one
Geordy, butcher, blind Of an eye. a
droll fellow. with much wit and rogu.
cry about him. lie was got. Instruct.
cd to be professor Of signs, but not to
speak on pain OF death. Geordy cheer.
fully undertook the role, The ambas.
sador was told that the professor OF
signs would be at home next day, at
which he rejoiced greatly.
Next day Gcordy was gowned. wig.
ged and placed IN a chair Of state In
room In the college. oil the profess.
ors and the ambassador being In IN
adjoining room. The ambassador was
shown into Geordy's room and left 10
converse with him "a we'll as he could.
the professors awaiting the issue with
fear and trembling.
The ambassador bead up one Of his
fingers to Geordy; Geordy held up two
Of his. The ambassador held up three;
Geocdy clinched his hst and looked
stern. The ambassador then took an
orange from his pocket and held II up;
Geordy took piece OF barley cake
from bis pocket and held that up.
After which the ambassador bowed 10
him and retired to the other professor.
who anxlously inquired his opinion
OF their brother.
HE is a perfect miracle said the
ambassador. II would not give him
for the wealth OF the Indies"
"Well," said the professors. TO de-
scend to particulars"
"Why." said the ambassador, II first
held up one finger. denoting that there
Is one God; be held up two, signlfyinl
that these are the Father and Son.
held up three. meaning the Father, tho
Son and Holy Ghost; he cllnched his
fist, to say that these three are one
I then took out an orange. slgnlfyins
the goodness OF God, who gives his cren'
lures not only the necessaries, but tha
luxuries. OF life. upon which the woa'
derful man presented piece OF bread
showing that It was the staff OF life
and preferable to every luxury"
The professors were glad that mat
tiers had turned out so well; so, having
got quit OF the ambassador. they next
got Geordy to hear his version OF the
signs.
"Well, Geortly, how have you come
on and what do you think OF yon
| MANI"
1.-THE rascalr' says Geordy. "What
did he do first think ye? He held ur
one finger. as much as to say, You
have only one eye. Then ! held up two
meaning that my one eye was perhaps
| as good as both bis. Then the fellow
held up three Of his fingers, to say tha'
there were bat three eyes between us
and then was 80 mad at the scoun
drel that I stocked my neive and was
to come wback on the side OF hi
head and would ha' done 1t, too, bu
| for your sakes. Then the rascal die
not stop with bis provocation here, but
| forsooth. takes out an orange, as muel
rs to say. Your poor, beggarly, COLI
country cannot produce that. ] show
ed him whang Of q bear bannock
meaning that did ma care a farthlnt
| for him nor his trash neither as lang'i
| ha' this. But, by a. that's guid,' con
cluded Geordy, "rm angry yet that
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