Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-04-10

GVEEGsIk2S
I. fS e
~~OO~

IrrHHL
Small BOY Gin ta;k Of swimmln;
school, anxiously) -Oh. pa, I've swal.
lowed some water. Viii they mind:-
Punch.
Tommy-Pop. what Is the difference
between fame and notoriety. Tommy's
| Pop-Notoriety lasts longer, my son.-
Philadelphia Record.
Did you ever see any N 30 home
ly?, No; why, hes SO honeiy that
automobile goggles are actually becom-
ing to hinl."--St. Louis Times.
How we have changed size the old
days." What do you meant Why,
to-day 1t isn't half so blessed TO give
as 1t is to be Il recoverable.
Mamma, have l got to take Il bath
Tonight I'm afraid you have, my
dear but / haven't done anything
all the week to deserve it.''-Life.
Mr.. Jawback-Tlat boy gets his
brains from me Mrs. Jawback-Some-
body got EN- from you, If you ever
had any-that's a clnch.-Cleveland
Leader.
Peggy-Was that %p'liceinan ever a
little baby, mother? Mother-Why,
yes. dear. Peggy (~thoughtfuIiy |
don't believe I've ever seen a baby
%p'liceman.
Farmer Bentoyer-l'ye just heard
that the wlGder Digs has married her
hired man. Farmer IIornbeak-Then,
he'll have to climb down from the fence
and so to work.-Puck.
Mrs ENTHUSIASTICALLY, I'm sorry
We didn't accumulate more souvenirs
of our European trip. Mr.. Newrocks
oh, we can get all we want in New
yorktown and Country.
Mrs. IIoon docking UP from her
ncwspaper)-IIere is an item about a
convict who writes poetry In prison.
Mr.. Hoen-H'm. Is that what he is
In for?-philadelphia Ledger
Il notice that you nearly always
smoke when you are writing" said the
caller. DO you draw your inspiration
from your pipe?" NO" replied the
horse reporter, Il draw smoke
Mistress-Jane, / saw the milkman
kiss you this morning. In the future
L will take the milk in. Jane
'Twouldn.t lie no use, mum. He's prom
ised not to kiss anybody but me-
boarding Mistress--I want a weeks
board in advance, SO as to be sure OF
1t. New Boardtr-That's all right.
Here's your money; now | want a
mo, l,s. rANl - n l,n,,A go. tI,.x ~
reason.
IIe-Young girls always want II
marry for love. but when they grow
older they wait to marry 4; man ii
money. She-Iou're wrong. They don't
grow old they merely grow WISER
st. Joseph Press-News.
everything lovely down at the
house," Yes we are leading the
quiet life these days How do you
work itg' well, you see, we have a
p~honograph, and it a~lternates with my
wife after supper."-Nashyille Banner.
jack hear you are engaged to that
homely Miss Gotrox. Tom-Ies; she
has half a million In her own right.
Jack-But money doesn't always lead
to happiness, old man. Tom-True,
but 1t ought to help some In the search.
Chicago News.
Business Man (busy with CORE
spondence l-In that telegram Of Beat
ties yesterday he said, letter follow
ing / don't see the letter here. Stem
ographer-Why, don't you remember?
I'VE r~eceiyedit the day before we got
the telegram.-ruck.
Borem-I think I hear your fathers
step on the stairs, SO perhaps / had
better bid you goodnight. Miss Hits
(yawning)-Oh, 1t can't be father; he's
a late sleeper. Perhaps it's the hired
girl coming down to prepare breakfast.
Chicago Daily News.
well, WE'LL growled the first man
at the banquet, why did they call on
that man for a speech? He Doesn't
know how to talk" NO" replied the
other, but he doesn't know what he's
talking about anyway. SO there's no
harm done. '-Philadelphia Press.
Reporter-Senator, l have heard that
you got your. Start IL IlAe ny Selling
newspapers. Senator Lotsmun-Not
quite correct, my boy. The fact is
but this is confidential, you know
that ! got my start by buying n or
two NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Tribune.
-Johlmy. why don't you be a good
boy like your brother WillyY the
mother was sternly admonishing her
naughty son. willy here may be
President some day, while YOU will
have to dig iii the sewer. but, moth
err. walled Willy. cant / dig in tbs
sewer sometimes too?y Harper's
Weekly.
.rroftssor.', said Mrs. Gaswell to
the distinguished musician who had
been engaged at 4 high price to enter
tain her guests, what was that lovely
selection you played Just now?" That,
madame he answered, glaring at her,
"was M Improvisation. "Ah, yes, I
remember now ! knew it was an cid
favoritc, but | couldn't think OF the
name Of it TO save me.'-Chicago Trib-
ane.
scstinE Him Rixht.
He@TeH me, ~confidentially, how
much did the hcniet cost you?
$500 .Lm as.~N{ t 49,