davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

ped out in time. saying that they wanted
thu couple to have the chance to make
their parting speeches alone. They got
ashore by mere hair. and the ship was
in midstream efore the husband became
wise to his position. Then he ragged and
stormed. He dashed at the skipper with
al offer of a million dollars, or something
fo~ a tug, but the skipper was with his
Wife and the tug wasn't possible. anyhow.
for II was foggy morning. and tugs were
under cover. The wife had got four or
five trunks filled with his clothes and
gear on board. He cooled off after the
second day. worked the wireless to ar
rang his most pressing affairs i'm New
York. and succumbed to his wifes en-
treaties TO settle down TO the inevitable
and behave. He remained in Europe for
five months, and came back looking as
strong as a prize fighter"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

x<THE seats of the mighty have
shifted since I saw them last
said pretty girl at the last
symphony concert. She wore a smart
tailor-made suit. with It's facade dec
GRATED with a bouquet made to repre-
sent a potato salad. but this did not af-
feet the expression of her opinions. Here
j am standing up at this brass railing
and drinking in the soulful sounds from
strings. woodwnd and all the other fix
ings of the compete and unabridged or
chcstra. while my nose is being tickled to
the sneeZng point by the cactuslike
'plumes on the hat in front of me. All
can see of the audience is perfect forest
of waving feathers, with here and there
a white hat looking like bunch of snow
in the middle of the street. But this has
got nothing to do with the seats of the
mighty 7 was starting to tell you about.
If YOU look noT'east by east. half east,
from where I'm squirting my left eye
s-.uiI see a real cabinet officer sitting
damned up here in the last row. just like
people II YOU wanted to you could reach
over ands touch his pompadour for luck,
and then skip back and he'd think sure
il was one of that bunch of chorus girls
crowded against the railing behind him.
But that isn't all. The back row is the
real goods today. for if you look along
across the aisle you'll see the rough rid
ing member of the civil service commits
sion bathing his soul in the melody and
looking CAD that he was lucky enough
To get in at all. The next time you want
to start looking for celebrities in this
thcater YOU needn't begin gazing at the
boxes. but just start in on still hunt
from the back of the house. and you'll
7
that this will start rage for seats near
the end of the alphabet. and that at the
next concert we can look for half the
Senate and a large chunk of the House
hpred tho listen to the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

loud bassoon. And. with these few
marks 1 will make a note that Mrs. Spuy-
tenduyvil looked charming in yellow hat
with a green feather and a pink gown
stored in blue plush, and take my leave,
which is about the best I GET
4 :; X X
Naval officers who have made the cruise
from the Atlantic to the Pacific at this
time of the year specializing as to
the effect of what is known as the Cal
lao painter upon the ships of the United
States battleship fleet during their stay
at Callao. The "Callao painter is a pc
culiar condition of the water in the har
Dor at times. caused by the presence of
sulphurated hydrogen due to sewer gas
or other cause. Ships painted white, as
are those of Admiral Evans fleet. have
beer known to turn a dirty brown or
grayish black within two days after an
chorirg in the harbor of Callao. the
change being attributed to the effects of
the mysterious "Callao painter" and that
despite the most persistent scrubbing.
Whether Admiral Evans ships are fated
to encounter the painter" and thus lose
their cleaning wilderness time alone can
tell. but if they do there will be unmis-
taxable manifestations of disgust on the
part of the bluejackets. to whom the
cleanliness of the fleet is matter of the
keenest pride.
The other day a little old man, who Is
visiting relatives here. ran out upon 14th
street and waved desperately to the con-
ductor to stop the car.
The car was a few minutes behind its
running schedule and the first instinct
of the conductor was not to stop the car.
Upon second thought he pulled the bell
rope Perhaps the old man, he unused,
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22
S4ANGHAING BUSY LEADERS OF BIG BUSINESS

curious oversight, his name didn't appear
on the sailing list. The official made
some warm remarks about the careless
ness of his secretary, and said that he'd
have to take potluck. 1t happened that
there was IA good suite available, and it
was set aside for the official. The purSer
asked him where his baggage was.
Don't know and don't care a hang,
replied the official. It's sleep that I'm
wanting now, and he turned in and was
sound asleep in no time. Now the skip
per of the steamer really had an idea
that this official had no purpose at all
of sailing to Europe on that cruise, and
so he tried himself with all his might
to bang the official awake before sailing
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22
- HEAR 7IAND SEEN At THE |cAPITALIz DID

warn you that YOU had better tell US
carefully just what you found there
THE witness. not at all awed, said
lightly:
''Oh. nothing of any consequence. A
beggarly account of empty boxes, as
Shakespeare says.
The lawyer struck the table a crash
ing blow.
Never mind what Shakespeare says.
sir he roared. He will be summoned
and can testify for himself in due course
if he knows anything about this case.
:; X :; x
Henry w Savage. president OF the AS
sociation of Theatrical Producing Man
ayers. was laughing over Bernard Shaw s
opinion of lese majestic. Mr.. Shaw. it will
be rememb cred. said of the recent i'm
prisonment of Editor Markveldt in Prus-
/ STA for this crime:
THE sentence is entirely logical and
correct The law against majestatsbe-
| leidigung is founded on d well-known and
| long-estabiished dogma that the king is a
divine person. Herr Markveldt. when he
wrote as he did. was guilty not merely OF
Observation-Disclosures. but OF biasphemy,
| and he may regard his escape from being
| burned alive at the stake as an ample
| fulfillment of the promise OF clemency
made to the reichstag. II is useless TO ask
! how the affair would stand in England.
| The English definitely decided in the sew
| enteenth century that king is a man.
| and the impression made by the kaiser
| during his recent visit. though highly
agreeable. has not altered our opinion in
| that respect"
| Mr.. Savage said that Germany was a
| hard country for editors.
Il know a German editor" he said-"he
| is an American editor now-who found
| himself one night when the paper was
about to go to press without any editori-
| ais. What was he to do? 1t was too late
| to write any himself, too late to have any
written. Like fash an inspiration came
| to him. and, dipping his pen he wrote
| hurriedly:
4" After carefully reading the editorials
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

it's a perfect pipe that those two fello S
took him for his roll and jewelry.
All right l say to the man who I'M
coils it in that way, there's a chance for
you to get a piece of yours back, anyway.
III drop down to the Tenderloin station
with you. and you can tell 'em down
there what you remember of the looks of
the pair of rollers who frisked you.
They'll probably have line on this pair
and will know just where 10 go out and
get them and in hauling them in they
may drag down at least part of your
stun. After your pair are pinched,
though, of course. you'll have to go to 1
police court and make your complaint
against them and tell them what you
know and about how it happened. You'll
be willing to do that. of course?
This is the spot where he backs water
they all do.
Going Home Soon.
What. Ire gurgles, gaspngly, and
llave it get into all the papers here and
then telegraphed out to the papers in my
home town how / was rolled while fig
gigging around lot of New York joints,
and have my folks and friends read it
and me going back home in a couple of
days? What dye think 1 am? A lunatic?'
And that. as rule, settles it.
should say that not more than one man
in five hundred will put his name to a
complaint in such case as that. They'd
vastly prefer to stand for the loss, no
matter how big the loss may be, than to
show themselves up as they call it, by
making a complaint.
But during the past few years a GER
tain class of fellows who have become so
used to being rolled every time they come
to New York that they looked upon it
as part of the game have at the same
time become foxy. They put up at diff
ferent hotel every time they come here.
and every time they put up under a diff
ferent name and with the name of diff
ferent town tackled after the assumed
name. They do this with the deliberate
anticipation that all sorts of things are
liable to happen to them while they're on
their New YQIk Whirl. They're not only
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

They can neck him or stake him TO
the doss drops-the knockout drops. I
mean-or they can give him the boots and
ruin MS face and head for the balance OF
| his life if he gets surly with them. They
| can hash him up generally. And these
| frlskers are good deal inclined TO de-
velop crouch against a man whom
they've nudged along to his all-in point
| Tor good thing, and who. when they get
TO the point where they're rolling him
has fooled them up by packing away his
stun where they can't get il.
They are good deal in favor of kick
ing IN the countenance the stranger with
in these gates who fools them up in this
way.
Rubes With the Clean.
But we'd get fat warning them
hotel scout doesn't dare take a chance
trying to warn guests from other cities
Why? Well, because they'd take il for
granted that the hotel sleuth suspected
them of being rubes unable to care for
themselves in New York, and If there's
anything calculated to give a sure-enourh
rube crouch it's the suspicion that
somebody or other in New York suspects
him of being one OF that breed Often T
make sort of little mental book with
myself when i see certain fellows start
ing out from here Of nights with q so-
of lemme-at-it CLEAN in their ewes
can foretell just about the kind of a
game they are going up against. the trou
BILE they're going to get in, the cost OF
the fun they're going to have. and pic
ture the whole details right down to the
minute on the next day. or the day after
that. when they coop me up in a shadowy
corner and tell me the long. long story of
their troubles. But the fact that I can
forecast the troubles wouldn't justify me
in taking them aside and trying that warn
thing on them. They'd be there with all
sorts Of squelchiness about what they'd
call my officiousness. and the older 1 get
the more / banker for a quiet life. And
men'll be rolled in New York as long q
street cars run here"
CLARENCE L. CULLEN.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

NEW YORK, February u, 1908.
- TATISTICS compiled at police head
quarters show that an average of
- fifty persons. mostly men, are rob-
bed of their money and valuables in New
York every twenty-fOur hours. The
figures point out that the great ma
jority OF these victims are strangers
in the city. The number includes
those who beaten and robbed by
out-and-out highwaymen. those who are
deprived of their possessions through
slick games manipulated by cheerful
workers, those who are the victims OF
knockout drops plain alcoholic ire
sponsibiity-all classes of individuals who
one way or another. become the prey of
that large body OF desperate characters
who batten upon men OF more or less
careless habits
Recently the shrewdest hotel detective
in New York. a man who has had a first
hand focus on this sort of a thing for
more than a quarter of a century, fur
nished me with some novel views with
reference to that extraordinarily large
class of men from other cities and towns
who make periodical visits to New York
for the purpose of having a good time"
and who "have it" with a vengeance.
II doubt if it's known that there are
plenty of fellows who occasionally visit
New York from other cities and towns
who confidently expect to be frisked
every time they come here. and their
confidence is rarely abused at that OBJ
served this hotel detective in his vernac-
ular. They are the chaps who trek to
New York from all over the country for
the express and deliberate purpose OF tax
ing the lid of. About nine out OF ten
of these visitors get themselves rolled at
some stage or other of their whoop-up-
generally the final stage, when they're
about all in.
LAT various hours every forenoon I'm
interviewed by bleared. dazed and tired
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

river pier his idea being to watch the
operation of some new tangled unloading
machinery in which he was interested
When he left the Broadway restaurant
he was pretty we'll wound up, and the
jogging about he got in the cab finished
him. By the time he reached the water
front he had forgotten all about unload
ing machinery and that sort of foolish
ness. and was firmly of the opinion that
he was on his way to Europe on extreme
ly important steamship business. He
numbered I'D the gangway of the ship of
his line III his evening clothes, and was,
of course. at once recognized as one of
the main officials of the line. The purser
told him, however. that, through some
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

might be going for a doctor. or perhaps
he wanted to catch train
The accommodating conductor jerked
the rope with a vim and the car came
to a sudden halt
Breathing fast, the old man rushed up
to the car and asked. Dye go by the
post office.
Yep said the conductor. step lively
Well said the man. hurriedly ex-
planning, without moving. yer jest drop
this in the post office as yere passing.
will year?' The Old man meantime had
thrust an envelope into the conductor s
hand as he addressed him. and then hur-
ried back up the street. The conductor
jerked the bell cord savagely, but it was
new one, and it stood the test.
x x x x x
Were you ever shaved by a Mauser
missile?"
The foregoing query was put to a ma
rine who served in the war with Spain by
Edwin Robb of the 4th Immune Camp
of Spanish War Veterans. at a recent re-
.cion of veterans. Ed did not succeed in
getting across to Cuba in tho early part
list in. regiment of volunteers and
crossed the Pacific to the Philippines
where he saw hot and lively service. He
was on the hrlng nne many times. anC
said different men experience different
sensations when they are first under the
fire of the enemy, with bullets whistling
all around them. AS for himself. when
the Filipinos commenced popping away at
his company the first time, he s1id he
felt kind O. squeamish about the
stomach
But to return to his interrogatory to
the marine:
II was shaved on the right side of my
face by a Mauser bullet" Robb added.
at that time we were kept hiking after
the enemy so constantly that we did not
get much chance to shave ourselves. So
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22
az
a.

I likely to be rolled they know. but they re
pretty apt to be pinched for frivolng
| around too unanimously. In any case
they've got their fixed-up names to fall
back upon.
You see. the assumed name is a great
thing for the rolled man to fall back
upon who. when it's all over, expe-
| riences the desire to get his stuff back.
He can make a complaint in case his
friskers are nailed and not have any
fear of the consequences. He's an an
onymous individual. and there isn't any
way of proving that he isn't the man he
says he is. Whenever a rolled guest of
this house tells me that he is willing to
20 the limit in making a complaint l can
come pretty near feeling sure that he is,
for his own good purposes, sailing under
a phonY name.
Under a Borrowed Plume.
Not long ago there was one case that
didn't nudge through easily for the
frisked one who was down on the regis
ter under assumed name. The name
he scratched on the register was quite d
common one. but he wrote out his homo
address as a town in Iowa. He tanked
up and went out and got frisked. ac-
cordng. presumably. to his expectation,
and then on the next day he went with
me to the Tenderloin station to put up
his shrek and make out his complaint
against the fellows who had rolled him.
The rollers were grabbed and they had
the ring and the pin Of the man with the
fixed-up name from the town in Iowa.
The story got into the papers, and on the
following day the actual owner of that
common name. who. by strange coin
cidence. actually. hailed from that little
town in Iowa, appeared at the Tender
loin station and made many different
kinds Of howl about the way his name
had been used in connection with the
case.
HE was stopping at . hotel only a
little way up the street from this one.
and he was very sedate proposition.
who didn't tour New Yerk's under-cover
points OF interest at night, and he was
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

/. with others of my company. let my
beard rush to use army parlance. In
one of our fights Filipino sharpshooter
hidden in the shrubbery away in front of
our line was trying with all his skill to
pot me. The bullets were kicking up the
dust all around me. and had constant
desire to duck Finally one of the fell
lows shots grazed the side of my face.
1t felt like a hot blast from hades. and.
looking on the ground beside me, l saw
that he had clipped off nearly all my
blonde beard and there it lay i'll curly
mass.
Yes. / brought it home with me. and
my best girl put it in a sachet bag and
embroidered in silk on the receptacle
these words: 'Eddies whiskers.'
x x x < x
A story told recently at a banquet was
that about a very sick Scotchman. A
doctor had been called to the patient S
home to attend him. and. after carefully
diagnosing the case. decided that an
operation was necessary to save life
When he announced TIT fact TO the
Scotchman the patient replied:
We'll, if l have to be operated upon, I
want the minister to be present"
But it is not necessary to have the
minister present. replied the physician.
But the old man could not see it that
way. and insisted upon the minister COM
ing to the operating room.
What is your reason for wanting the
minister present at the time of the opera
TOM asked the doctor.
We'll. sir said the Scotchman. Il
always believe in having prayer at the
opening ceremonies
i: :: X !;
my. my" remarked one of the Oldest
inhabitants. ''how times have changed
Now when / was boy we played around
in the snow until we got our bYts soak
ing wet. and when we get home we gen
a,l liz got linl1 i.acr Ii Ii far
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

days we suffered from chilblains We
wore leather boots in those days. and IL
was impossible to get them off when
wet except with a bootjack, and some
times not even with the aid of that now
obsolete articles. Nowadays the boys wear
rubber boots which keep their feet dry,
and apparently they don't know anything
about chilblains. Those Of us of an older
generation who have suffered the burning
tOrtures of that malady are likely never
to forget the experience. and if the boys
of today escape its attacks altogether they
are lucky indeed
=: :: < x x
The South Washington colored preacher
paused after long and rather dry theo-
logical discourse on the subject THE
Way of the Transgressor is Hard" and
after hopping his brow, exclaimed:
Now that l have pointed out to you
sin and its penalty. what more shall l
say, brethren"
A tired and browsing colored lad in a
front pew who was rubbing his eyes Wig
orously sang out:
please say amen. mister and let us go
home
Senator Gallinger. lunching in the Sen
ate restaurant. said of new and unso-
phistcated young office seeker:
HE reminds me of d witness in a dam
age suit in Newport. This witness, a
farm hand. when he was called to give
his testimony. said eXcitedIy and earnest
ly. as he took his place in the box:
(Which side am / on?''
Senator Aldrich smiled.
AN ignorant. uniformed chap he is, -
said he. LAS ignorant and uniformed
as a cross-eXamner I once heard in
Providence in a perjury case.
This lawyer. with terrible frown at
Il witness who had just been handed for
cross-examination to him. said:
"'You say you made an examination of
the premises? Tell us again. sir, and ]
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-02-22

Mr.. Morse, who, after reaching
England on a boat. turned right around
and came back again. wasn't anything I'M
usual" observed a local steamship agent.
He knew. for one thing. that he was
going to Europe. Plenty of chaps make
the start for Europe without really know
ing anything about it. AS matter OF
fact a steamship official of considerable
note once made quite unusual voyage to
Liverpool.
He left pretty giddy Broadway sup
per party at or o'clock in the morn
ing 10 drive down to one of the steamers
of his line that was tied up at a North
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1908-02-29
OAhWLlE HAPPENINGS

Services in the local churches, as
usual tomorrow.
Confessions will be heard at the
church of st Mary Magdalen this
evening.
Master Richard Fitzpatrick of
Main street is recovering from
slight attack of illness.
Charles Hubbell has moved his
family from Rockdale avenue to a
tenement in the LaFage place near
the residence of Daniel Pullen.
Rumor has it that A. c. Troland,
the popular Main street barber, is
to dispose of his business and is to
go west for the benefit of his health.
H. w. Keisel, who has been liv-
ing in Waterbury for some time
past, where he is employed as drug
gist by the G. l.. Dexter Co, has
moved his family back to Oakville
and will occupy tenement on Falls
avenue.
The Rev Father Traynor cele-
brated a months mind requiem high
mass at ST Mary Magdalene's church
at $50 O'Clock this morning for the
late Timothy Kelly, at which large
gathering of relatives and friends
were present.
A large delegation of taxpayers
from Oakville will be present at the
town meeting in town hall, Water
town, on Monday evening. The
meeting promises to be one of the
most interesting in years as a large
number of citizens think they are
| assessed too high.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1908-02-29
General Markets.

New York Feb q.
FLoUR-Duu and unsettled: Minnesota
patents. S9oa5.5e. winter patents. A.5oa
40. winter straights. A91aI5o; winter ex-
trss. Sss5a415
RYE FLOUR - Steady: fair to good.
t4.slaLsO: choice to fancy. Sass
WHEAT - In rejecting strong cables
wheat sold up ive-eighths 81 a cent. but
later eased OF q little under profit TAX
ing: May. y05a.aI-1S7s. July. s-0Jtzal.ol.
BUTTER Creamery. specials. per
pound sllzas1c extras. Dc: firsts. SAB
seconds. ssa27c.. thirds. &c: held specials.
2Bl4c. extras. 96c-s firsts 2Sa2sc-; seconds.
safe. thirds &c: state dairy. common
20 fair. ala5~. process. specials. 80;
extras. &c. frsts. z51sal4c-: seconds. &c.
imitation creamery. frsts eiaEe.
CHEESE - Pull cream. specials Isc.;
state. full cream small Colored and white
fancy. and large. eoiored. fancy. i5asc
large. white. fancy. lstzc good TO prime.
ifl-ai5l.c.. late October and early Noveu-
her made. Isizs1s1zc- winter made. l2aisc-
common 20 fair 1saiitzc. skins. IL pound
specials lie. skins. fine. uaas5zc-: fair 70
Eood. saSe.: Common slsafizc-' full skins,
iaar
Fg4Gs-state. Pennsylvania and nearby.
selected white. fancy. ssc-s good to choice
rs. brown ard mixed. fancy, zAasc.
s-sss Zzs11zr tfrffes. fsa5c.: checks. "a
fac rsfrfgsTatoTs- Isa21c-
HAY-FIrner- god 70 choice. s1sl-s.
HOPS-DuI. state common 70 choice
izEz. ss1sc. I5ls- Assc
STRAw-ouies At sFaTc
LIVE POULTEY-TnchsnE
DRESSED POELTRT - Firm and n
Eoed demand fr==h Kidd fowls. choice.
In4e. Do. fair % god uisaIsc-s Oh
ruostsrs. lec-- raising chickens- nesrbT,
Iszf7c. wes-erI- g. Haze TURKEYS
usaray. chnfcs 20 fsEcy- I.zzsc-s D.. fair
d raod I1a1z- g. western ra1Ece g
fairy. T-s1se- g. fssr n god Essisc-i
aaeks. n4srby- chsscs. tAarsc-- g. fair q
Fsa1 12zI1c western. -. chs8ce. Issls-;
g. fair 20 ed ssz5C