The Lexington advertiser., 1908-02-28
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3 over THE COUNTY 3
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From GanderbOne.

EIOktl OoUuSkUOnrs
The ides of March will come again,
When Caesars blood was let;
The foes Of Bryan will hide out
Behind the parapet
And when he sees them lurking there,
He'll guess their full intent
And run just like his friends all hope
He'll run for President.
The candidates Republican will pass
the stand again, and the portly form OF
Mr.. Taft will show handsome gain ;
the whiskerlets of Mr.. Hughes will
float upon the breeze, the ship that
sailed Magellan's Straits will cruise
the western seas; the infant boom OF
Cortelyou will grimlv yield the ghost,
and the feet will run the banquets
on the other Latin coast.
Another lot of foreign counts, and
busted sports and old, will come across
to marry more of our dead easy gold /;
a count will marry a million cool, and
a discount two or three, and gold and
girl land horse laugh Loudly they'll all
put out to sea and while the Goulds
give Boni one-just one-more chance,
alack, we'll all steal Oft and kick our
selves quite low down on the back.
The country papers will get used
To Uncle Sans mandate
That they may not hold readers who
Are not paid up to date;
But the Government will not ass ist
At squaring things, somehow,
With old subscribers made so mad
They never will pay now.
March was the first month CT the
Roman year, and was named from
Mars, the god of war. Mars looked
like q twin brother to Richard P. Hob.
son and he was the regular Roman
delegate to the Peach Conference at
The Hague. He was supposed to be
the father of Romolus, the founder OF
Rome, but he was not; he was only
the young mans godfather. In ancient
warfare it was customary to place q
good bronze bust of Mars on the field
and then fight for it. =.
The comedy of life will be bout
what it has been--the men will labor
day and night. and the wives OF men
will spin. They'll have a club for
every day. and never cease to go;
they'll learn to talk of many themes
their husbands do not know; the II
hear lecturer from Greece, another
fromJapan, another on theRenaissance,
and several on man; they'll hire lot
of long haired freaks to make them
erudite, they'll work on papers every
morn, and look up things at night;
and their husbands will get supper
cold and suffer ridicule-and the chill
dren will grow up like wolves, while
Mamma goes to school.
The money indiscreetly loaned
Will faithfully keep Lent,
And lady teacher will sit on
The pin when it is bent;
But when the principal responds
To screams heard through the house,
She'll not tell him what happened, but
Will say she saw mouse.
Until the 2tst, March will be under
the influence of the zodiacal sign
known as Pisces, the Fish. Pisces
will induce his relative, Stuyvesant
Fish, to take the Illinois Central fight
into the q. s. Supreme Court, where
e. "a. Hartman will be ditched with
two bum lamps, derailed backbone
and swift kick in the caboose.
After the 21st, March will be under
the influence of Aries the sign of the
Head. Under this sign, old heads will
come to the front in the presidential
race, and Uncle Joe Cannon will come
out of last place and make the Presl-
dent put two more burrs in the spaci-
Gus bosom of Mr.. Taft's pants.
Persons born under Pisces drink like
q fish ana vote wet. They make ex-
cellent subordinates, like Friday and
Loeb. They can say no, and it is fu-
tile to expose them to any more life
insurance, for they won't take it.
They are very cautious, and always
take seats near the fire escape. Persons
born under Aries always think before
speaking. and then never say any
thing. They are good organizers and
generally belong to the Anti-Saloon
League. They make good lawyers,
and generally get the case continued
until they can elect the prosecuting
attorney
The vernal Equinox will come,
And the Irish will parade;
The booming bulltrog will resume
His music in the glade.
The mole will burrow in the lawn,
And the rash duck hunter toot
His caller while pneumonia drills
A leak hole in his boot.
And then the gentle spring will
come and the poet will essay, with
swelling breast and bliss his bum and
Muse attended lay; the rooster will
announce the dawn, and the hen will
scratch the dirt. and everybody will
put on q thinner undershirt. The
sassafras will brew again to tone the
system rank, and the washout will up
set the train and threw it down the
bank; the gander and the goose will
moult, the meadow will be wet, and
the spring intoxicated colt will turn
summerset The house will be