The new era. (Walden, Colo.) 1906-19??, 1908-09-17
THE ''BR0NicAL
zoo"
vnoie hIoks' Visit to New York.

is doing a roaring trade these days.
Every run the omnibus makes be-
tween the station and the hotel sees
every seat occupied. and there is an
early rush to get the dickey seat with
old Uncle" in the hope that he will
hold forth on his recent marvellous ex-
periences In and about New York.
Uncle Hicks. be it known, has
lived in the mountains for rs years,
and since his week in the ''metrolopus"
he Is inclined to say, with Chevalier,
ut don't seem day too much" But
the mountain resort was thrown into
CONSERVATION one morning last week
when Uncle" Hicks appeared at the
station with carpet bag, wearing his
go-tomeeting raiment and minus the
omnibus.
Me" he said. with the air of q
man who has made up his mind. I'm
going to N'yawk. l been thinhn' o
dom 1t FIR tn las IS years-an' now
I'm dom It," he added, firmly.
And SO Uncle" Hicks departed with
his carpet bag. The engine driver and
the conductors knew Uncle" Hicks
and felt honored Uncle" was hon
ored, too, for the engine footed as he
got aboard. and footed vociferously
when Uncle" Hicks came back. There
was delegation of Acknowledges to
meet him. Also the omnibus was
waiting
The Acknowledges who had crowd
ed in to hear the wonderful tale were
disappointed Uncle" Hicks chewed
"metrolopus" cigar and gazed
blankly at the landscape. He did
vouchsafe q remark to the effect that
Summer seems ter be bit late up
this way"
Then the rush fell of and a reporter
took advantage of an empty omnibus
to get on the dickey. He approached
the subject with reportorial tact. The
Impressions Of a man who had waited
rs years before visiting the metropolis
could not fail to be interesting from
a psychological standpoint. The re-
porter recalled the first time he him
self had seen the inside Of the Hippo
drome.
1.-THE Hippodrome!" said Uncle"
Hicks, with a start Of recollection. Il
went thar twicet. The stage O that
thar place is about $50 feet long and
about 80 or 80 feet wide. l seen 1t in
the program book. An thar's tank
in 1t ye cu'd shoot, duck in. l seen
more animiles-parformin animiles-
IN that thar plac-
But whut TUX me-talkin' OF anil
miles-was that Bronical Zoo"
''The what did you say; uncle?"
81 said the Bronical Zoo" said
Uncle" Hicks, with glare. by
dunn, seen animiles thar that l don't
believe Is Twin any other place.
seen a thing they call a zebra, which
ia Just a blame mule painted up to
look queer. But know hosskind, an
1t didn't fool me.
'T seen a sea lion, too. That was
genwine. all right, cause 1T hadn't no
feet II fiappered mp on the rocks an
howled like mad That's dun
queer beast. must ha' looked at that
beast for an hour n quarter"
did you see the snakes. uncle?"
Nav, didn't" said Uncle" Hicks.
81 don't love them things well enough
to 20 an look at them for fun. But
seen a thing thar wantit to ask
SOMEBODY abaout 1t was Bird
reck'n it was meant for bird-an' 1t
had bill like shovel"
WAS it toucan. uncle?"
Nav, it warn't no too-can."
Maybe 1t was duck-mole."
Now, 1t warn't no duck-mole,
neither.
The reporter tried few more. but
in vain.
Anyhow, 1t was a dunn queer
beast" said Uncle" Hicks, with an air
of finality. "Reck'n they got every
blame thing on airth thar They even
got skunks."
you must have gone in the sub
way to get there?' suggested the re-
porter
1.-The subway" said uncle with a
frown. 1.-The way they hustle man
in that place is disgrace.
But New York itself, uncle? How
about Broadway"
Pretty fair town." said uncle, In
differently. But l was disappointed
some Ye wud think t hear folk talk
1t was dunn bad place f'r accidents
an murders and thieves. But l never
lost a cent while wus thar. 'cept In
one O. them blame slot m'chines. 1t
either wus swindle or 1t wusnt
workin'. But went to busy corner
on Broadway and stood thar Is min
utes. l seen 80 trolley cars pass-I
counted 'em-an' dezzens of automo-
biles and kerridges an waggins-an'
there wusn't blame accident that
c'ud see.
81 went to show on Broad Way,
too. 1t was called "A Day FIR Night
an wus dunn good show too
But what did you think Of the tall
buildings, uncle?"
Uncle" Hicks turned suspicious