Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1908-12-27
announcement about that niX-Signins

announcement about that nix-signing
thing.
They don't seem to read it anywhere
that their manager is Bursting any blood
vessels or going into a decline or any
thing like that because they. the mixers
aren't putting their signatures to the
sign-up papers.
This is disquieting. Yep. VARY dis
quieting. VARY perturbing.
There they are anchored, sort O maroon
ed, in the little old Iowa OR Ohio or Illinois
and no delegations of frenzied pleaders or
beseechers are being sent to 'em by heart
broken managers OF ball clubs; and here
the bunch is getting together, ready to
take the train de luxe for the palmetto
lands. where the magnolia petals are fall
ing in the big front yards, and where
Or
Well, they amt been treated right.
evvebody knows that: an this ball-playin'
gag is nothin but a trust. that's what 1t
is. fixed up t grind men down. but-but--
Well, II that's the way they're goin' t
be treated. all right. Oh. yes, they'll sign
up. ali right. Sign up, just to keep the
team from startin' out crippled. And so
on and so on.
Whereupon the nix-nixers SIGN. They
sign so eagerly and TREMENDOUSLY that they
splatter ink all over the place.
But always. boy. they SIGN.
However, it's to laugh. It's the COM
edy. It's the joke stuff to watch 'em
flack their arms and to listen to their
drool along about this season, when they
are mixers, or think they are.
But. when you come TO think 1t over,
why shouldn't they sign?
Take a look. Wouldn't any average
male. wearing anything but four and
three-eighths hat. sign? don't mean rail-
road and bank presidents. or people like
those, understand. You'll observe that l
said average male" BY that I mean the
fellow who has to keep wiggllng all the
time to make good and to get little
something for himself-a livelihood, that
is. and little pocket change.
Now, would any average male Of this
kind be there with thankee. kindly, sir.
if he was offered the kind of perfect
living snap that ball players cop out for
themselves?
/ am voting yes, that's what 1 wot
1t wasn't such a long time ago when I
got up what's called Symposium
whatever that comes to, consisting Of a
bunch Of talks by noted ball players, on
this topic:
as ball playing work or is 1t Just fun?'
Clarence Knows.
Most OF the noted ball players-nearly
all OF them-puled me long map when
I sprung that on them, and told me that
they considered ball playing just the hard
est kind OF work; yas'm; honest Injun.
Which that same was the bunk, boys.
And the noted ball players were con-
versing through their browning glories of
hair and solely to listen unto their torso
tones.
Another think it over Do you consider
that ball players have got any kind of a
crouch a-coming on the score of what
they get for the kind of goods they are
a Ske0 n deliverp
Now. the average male-I've a sneaking
sort of fondness for instancing that pa
tient, overwhelmed chap, the average
male-has it put right UP to him from
in the morning until he turns In again at
night. They're looking him over every
second. He's got to be Johnny -on-the-
Job every instant Of his waking time.
Often as not he has too mooch through a
kind of work that he doesn't like; that.
even. he hates. Generally too, he isn't
any too well paid for it. He doesn't snag
much fun out Of the old thing. Doesn't
get much fresh air. Hasn't the price CT
much minsling up or foregathering with
the bunch. Has to deny himself about
nine-tenths of the little schemes that bob
up and that look like they might have d
little fun in them. Life isn't any cluster
of carnations for him. He just manages
to dig by. and that's about all. But he
plods his little old path, does this average
man, brave, CHceTS, tdk!llS tHe "hiiopS
that are handed up to'him with daunt
less spirit and gallant heart, Girding not
at Fate or the Lady Fortune. but game to
swallow his medicine.
There sure is something fine about the
average man. after you peer him over.
/ certainly do like that fellow.
Now. you stack this accomplishing
average man alongside the ball player.
Compare their respective conditions. Not
that I'm maintaining that the average
ball player measures up for minute
with the average everyday man in men
tally, nerve. gizzard agreeableness or
anything else-for he just does not: and
that's all the more reason why the ball
player ought to be glad about things.
for he surely doesn't figure in the dope
at all except when considered strictly as
ball player.
The ball player. then, Is petted, pam
pered. coddled and taken care of like a
Connecticut avenue baby from the very
hour that he shows that he's possessed Of
the manual deXterity-no great thing In
itself--that will enable him to cut a figure
in big league ball. His whins are hui
mored. his bodily comfort is looked after
as If he were a prima donna; the world
is his bivalve. and he has the Sign of
the SiWaShes on the little game with
Destiny from then on.
Many Opportunities.
Examine the chance that he has, for
one thing, to keep himself in firsf-rate
bodily trim. How many clean, clippersh
young fellows there are in this land. COM
PEELED to scroonch over desks or to
huddle around in factories through all the
sunshny hours. who would be just tickied
foolish If. without any pay for ii at ALL
they could have that chance to keep lin
Der and agile and to skylark around on
an emerald sward and inhaie Gods sweet
tingly ozone and stretch their arms and
legs and feel all the time that they are
keeping themselves fit and fine.
Are there many of them? Why. there
are millions of them who would be glad
to have that kind of a show for their taw
marble!
The ball player "works"-that is to say.
he wears an athletic uniform--for three or
four hours Il day. on tie average. during
the playing season. Then. after his nice
little perspire, he swabs off. jumps into
his purity clothes Ohe like of which he