The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1908-10-05
The Goodness
of Peter.
Rx EDGAR HEI TON COOLEY
By EDGAR wELTON COOLEY.


DOIt upright Eeu. MOI TOUR Ieel
from him sto man with q mask
over his eyes. was holding a dark
lantern. fiashin2 lie light gIaringly in
Peters face.
How dare you" began the man with
the mask. oTerGed-"how dare you set
an alarm clock TO go of at the very
moment I'm rarsacking the house ?
Dye want to scare me to death? How
do you know but l might be subject
to heart failure or something and that
the sudden fright
Tin sorry began Peter humbly.
81 didn't mean TO disturb you. II
can't sleep comfortably on one side all
the time. you know. and l have to set
the alarm to awaken me SO l can turn
over
OH said the man apprehendingly.
well don't let 1t occur again"
'I'll try not to-" replied Peter oblig-
ingly. But, you know" he hesitated.
you can't always fell about that clock.
You can't always anticipate its behav-
Tor. 1t Is very absentminded clock
and possesses some very peculiar no
tons Of it's own Really 1t Is the most
aggravating clock you ever saw. Why.
once l set the alarm for o'clock in
the morning I wished to go to the sta
ton to meet my uncle. you know. He
was a very rich bachelor, with no i'm
mediate family. Besides, he was in ex-
ceedingly poor health. And, would you
believe 1t. that miserable clock betray-
ed the confidence imposed in itT'
"And your uncleY' asked the man
interestedly.
My uncle was compelled to hunt me
UP and ring US out of bed. 1t was very
embarrassing. OF course we had to
make some kind Of an explanation.
But unfortunately, you know, my wife
and I had no opportunity to consult
together. We told entirely different
stories. That made my uncle sus-
picious."
Naturally" said the man.
Then, to make matters worse" re-
sumed Peter. with a sigh. my uncle
was chronic story teller, one Of those
people who take frenzied delight in
relating long narrative with a joke
at the end Of 1.-THE kind of a joke,
you know. that you don't really laugh
Ut QAth Tue next
II understand" said the man, TAX.
ing a seat on the edge of the bed re.
signedly. I've heard them kind OF
Jokes myself. I call 'em vaccination
jokes. They have a point to 'em all
right, but they don't take until later
Besides, they are pretty near as bad
as having the smallpox"
The man chuckled softly. We'll"
Peter continued, Eat breakfast that
morning this uncle of mine told one OF
his stories. 1t was during the DAYS
when nearly everybody had one of
those silly little things they called
chestnut bells. You rememberr'
Perfectly" said the man.
"Well, at the very moment my un.
Gle sprang his joke and leaned back to
enjoy our mirth that clock-that un-
regenerate, malicious clock Peter
laughed long and loudly
"Don't! cried the man in a hoarse
whisper, glancing affrightedly about
You'll arouse the household"
There isn't anybody else in this
part Of the house." treasured Peter
but my wife, asleep in the next
room, and she's deaf. you know. Real.
ly she is SO deaf that 1 can wear q
red necktie. green checkered trousers
and purple vest and come home any
hour Of the night without awakening
her"
You're lucky" said the man, "and
being lucky
Lucky" repeated Peter. I'm %
lucky
"Never mind about that" interrupt-
ed the man. II was Just going to re-
mark that I never saw a lucky man
who didn't have money"
Money!? replied Peter. "Of course
have money Really. I've got so
much money that I can't fall down
without breaking. bill, you know.
Once r.
Just hand it over, then" interposed
the man with the mask commandinxly.
do | understand that you wish me
to hand my money over to you Y'
Queried Peter cautiously.
That's what 1 remarked" replied
the man. land you'd better be quick
about it II you don't want
My dear SIR" said Peter impressive
ly. "as one who has specialized more
or less successfully. beg to give you
little timely advice"
See here" said the man irritably. .I
amt going to waste any more time
with you. I've wasted too much al
ready"
why, go you have" remarked Peter
thoughtfully. but you see It isn't ex
actly my fault! didn't invite you
here. and, really. I'm not insisting upon
your staying. you know. Maybe you're
waiting for me to order you outy'
We'll. you are COOL" said the man
admiringly.
''Of course I'm COOL" replied Peter
ITS very convenient to be cool some
times-on a cold winters night, for IA
stance. You see. your wife won't put
her feet against you II you are cool"
The man with the mask laughed soft
~, then arose to his feet Look here
he said. ARE you going to give me that