Dakota farmers' leader. (Canton, S.D.) 1890-19??, 1908-07-17

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everything comes 10 INK Who
waits" unused the man in a restau
rant "but 1t comes cold"
Head Waiter-What's he want
Waiter-Says he wants a little Of ev-
erything. Head Walter-Giye him
hash.-Chicago Journal.
Customer-Have you IN oil painting
Of John d. Rockefeller? Clerk-No,
faa'an no one has. lie has never been
done In oil.-Leslie's Weekly. i,
Il should never have thought that
studying would have cost Sc much
money" Yes, father; and If you only
knew how little 1 have studied
Judge.
DO you ever meet Or. Rybold?'
"Often. He and I-er-are thrown to-
gether a good heal. We travel on the
same suburban trolley line."-Chicago
Tribune.
The Caddy (as the colonel misses the
ter. Say it. Don't mind me. I've been
in the business. for three years now
The Sketch.
BE mine!" cried in n voice sur
charged with anguish. "If you refuse
me. l shall die" But the heartless
girl refused him. That was sixty years
ago. Yesterday he died.
Mrs. HoJle-T've found out where
my husband spends his evenings. Mrs.
Doyle-Where? Mrs. Hoyle-At home.
You see, I had to stay in myself last
night.-Harper's Weekly.
Miss Blondlcck-How dare you tell
people my hair Is bleached? You know
1t ID false. Miss Rayenwing-Yes,
dear, l know it is. l told them it was
bleached before you got it.
Irate Pas senger Gas train is moving
of)-Why didn't you put my luggage
In as l told you? Porter-Eh, man,
yer luggage is no sic a silly as yersel'.
Ye're 4 the wrang train.-Tit-Bits.
Eyes, just as soon lis the parson
starts his sermon he stops all the cleo
trio fans" whats that forT' HE
knows that the hum is much too sooth-
ing on u warm day."-CleveLand Plain
Dealer.
Woman-Now that I have fed you,
are o going without doing your
work? Tramp-Oi couldn't wurruk on
an impty stomach, mum; an OF nivir
wurruk on err full one. So there yez
be!-Smart Set.
Sunday School Teacher-Did you
ever forgive an enemy? Tommy Turf
nut-Wunct. Sunday School Teacher
And what noble sentiment prompted
you to do 1t? Tommy Tuffnut-He
wuz bigger dan me.
Can you be trusted with Il secret?"
he asked. The drew herself
up proudly. you have known me for
ten years, haven't your" she replied.
YES" "Do you know how old I ann"
Philadelphia Ledger.
Little Fargie (after watching her
small brother devouring several large
sections of chocolate cake)-Mamma,
isn't 1t funny how much larger Jimmy
really is than he appears to be from
the outside?-Judge.
Smith-What's hat piece Of cord
SiCu AouAN youE uhSCI lOI! JOucS-
My wife put it there to remind me to
mail her letter. Smith-And did you
mail 1T? Jones-No. She forgot to
give 1t to me-Harper's Weekly.
Teacher Gin geography)-There are
so many people in China that every
time you breathe someone dies. ITO
small boy putting vigorously)-Harry.
what are you doing? Harry-I'm kill
ing Chinamen.-New York Sun.
IF We please, num-" said the ancient
hero, in an appealing voice, as he stood
at the back door OF the cottage on Mon
day, i've lost my leg" ''Well, I amt
got It." snapped the woman fercely, az
the door closed with a bang.-Victoria
Eagle.
Mistaken Idea.-"But, my dear"
demonstrated Mr.. Meekun, there's a
good deal to be said on both Sides"
mo, there isn't" answered his
spouse. 1--WE told you what I think
about 1t, and that's all that is going to
be said."-Chicago Tribune.
eyes" said the old man, my daugh-
ter Is still studying French. But she
can't speak the language at all, can
She r remarked the friend. "She
couldn't at first, but now she can speak
1t just enough to make herself unin-
Observation-Disclosures Press.
syhA Revnenw~~ Me-