davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Proletarec. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1906-19??, 1908-03-24

enkrat ma led - a nezavedni de-
lavci pa zmirom! Ali nj to zalo-
stno?
Po zadnji katastrofi V Collin
woodu so Sc naSi clevelandski ka-
pitalisti pokazali zelo radodarne.
Prizadetim druzinam paklanjajo
premog, kose obuval in obleke it'd.
Kje so pa bill ii radodarnezi pred
kataStrofoH Ali menijo s TEN "a
flikati nezgodo, ktero so kOlikor
toliko zakrivili. da hi Sc elm pref
pozabila? Ubozne druzine so pred
pozarom ravno tako potrebovale
kot sedaj in vsled tega Jim nj Sc
dag mic wee pomagano; Sc mani,
kapitalisticni darovi ne morejo W.
buditi zgorelih otrok k z~ivljenju.
Pesek Y ocil In pa reklama! Ka-
pitalisti6ni list poroGajo dan IA
dnevom z debelimi crkami. koliko
je daroval Ia ali oni in to mai bo
nezavednim delavcem vada. ceS.
kako dobri so kapitalisti. Ampak
pri zavedersh ljudeh TO ne veljal
Tudi milijoni dolariev ne bodO
povrnili nesreGnim matePam ne
dolznih otrok, ktere je umoril ka-
pitalisti6ni Sistem.
Proletarec. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1906-19??, 1908-03-24
Frank Hitt.

Cleveland, o. - Cenieni sodrug
urcduik! Upam. da najdc tn moi
dopiS proStor Y naSem dclavSkem
listu ''Proletarec". kteri So je
zadnji cas- tako lepo raz,iril tn V
Clevclandu in katerega radi be
reno ker vidimo. la je prekoriS-
ten ~ mas delavce.
Ako clovek aepi cello limo Y le-
Senem hramu. je to re wee kot
dolg cas-. Ce pa Sc poleg tega nj
ma kak nikel "a jecmenovca, po-
tenn je Sc hujSe. Clovek torej
komai caka, da Sc poslovi ia dol
gocasna lima in naStauejo prijaz-
nejSi dnevi. In ii dnevi prihajajo.
Seveda. ako hi imeli kapitalisti
moe podaliSati limo kakor zapre-
ii ~tvornico. gotovo hi nam ne pri-
voS6ili tudi teh lepih dni; toda
kap;tali,ti do danes Sc nina
io monopola "a vremc.
\ kaj nam pomagajo Sc lepi
dnevi. ko pa imamo prazne - ze-
pc. Ko Smo zadniic zborovali ma
Public Square zahtevajoci della
in kruha. in ko m poSlali zadnio
deputaciio X zupanu zaradi della,
nalagali so mas ii prefriganci. ia
bono imcli doSti della. kakor hit
ro naStane boljSe vreme. In Sc
danes je zmiraj pri starem Ia
imenitna gospoda nam vcdno obe-
la. obeta in Same obeta. a ne Sto-
ri ME. Ali maj delavci zivimo sa-
mo cd praznih obljub2
No mar so kapitalistu niegove
obljube dokler on zivi razkoSno in
dokler ga delavstvo pita 5 svo-
JIM zulji. Stradaj ii in tvoji oto-
ci kolikor hocete. on Sc ne bo ga
nil Y tvojo dobrobit. kaj ii on ina
vsega dovolj. In tega san 81 kriv
- kriva je dclavska masa -. da
ina on vse. ii pa mic. Kako dolgo
IA bo treba Sc drezati. tovariSi
moi, da Sc bodete pridruzili raz-
rednoZavednim borilcem IN skup-
ne koristi proletarijata? Ali Sc ne
veste tega. da delavci ne bodO nj
kdar dosegli svojih pravic. ako 81
Jill sami ne priborijoY.
Clevelandski rojaki '.jamrajo"
nj della. t%vornice nimajo naroGil.
Kajne. kako tezkO je cakati teh
preklicanih naroGil. Tvornicar lah-
ko caka. kajti on zdaj uziva to
kar je tebi pritrgal ma zasluzku,-
a ii ne mores cakatil Tebi in two
jim otrokom je treba JEST tudi
med cakaDjem. VidiS, to je cato.
ker sc zadovoljis z vsem kar ii
kdO nalozi ma pleGa. Kadar delaS.
takrat ii je dobrodosla vsaka dro-
btinica. Xxi Odleti IL kapitalistove
mize: in ce ii pc vrhu Sc ostane
"a kak glaz pive, tedai mislis, da
je YES svet tvoj. Daj. daj vzdra-
mi SCI
AkO hi bill slOvenski delavci VI
Clevelandu zdruzeni V moGni della
vski organizaciji, politicni in stro-
kovni, ako hi citali, razsirjali in
Sc i~zobrazevali IL delavskega ca
sopisja ter glasovali OBJ volitvah
"a kandidate delavske socialistiG-
ne stranke - bilo bi kmalo dru-
GAGE. Tako mas pa prefrigani delo-
dajalci samo vlecejo "a nos in
nam kazejo fige. Osel gre samo
Proletarec. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1906-19??, 1908-03-24

Sc prihodjne seize. Vsak rojak ina
prost vstop 6eravno nj elan kluba.
Ma svidenje torej V soboto %. ma
rca oh S uri zvecer pri sodr. FIR.
Mladicu. Center ave & 18th. st.
S socialistiGnim pozdravom
Frank Podlipec, tajnik
Proletarec. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1906-19??, 1908-03-24

Ia tuje oglase v "Proletarcu"
nj odgovorno upravnistvo ne u
sevajo v naSem listu. Ako kupuje-
tie, prosimo, omenite "Proletarca"
rednistvo.
Proletarec. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1906-19??, 1908-03-24


mitivnih delavnic, najdenih V geo
loskih jamah, XII spadajo V neoli-
ti6no epoho.
Tudi delo vrsi funkcijo, Xxi gre
"a redom in "a podrejenjem pOsa-
meznikove delavnosti V ten samih
prvotnih druzabnih oblikah (ro-
dovih, hordah it'd. Toda delo
zelo previsuje vojsko. Xxi cele veke.
kazoc Sc kot gigant. ostaja lie "a
vora vsega ljudskega n%apredka:
kajti delo - pr~etvoritev snovi -
sile v svrho pridobitve duSevne in
gmotne existence cloveka - ina
V sebi duha ljudske solidarnosti,
pomoci in v%zajemnega ~soglasja.
Xxi popolnoma odgovarja potrebi
izobrazenega in plodnega zivlje-
MIA, cesar vojska nina.
In tako vidimo da gre delo vsled
nepreklicnega teka stvarij k T.
druzevanju. pokratenju razdruze-
nih poSameznikov. prvotnih Sku-
pin.hord i'm narodov - med TEN.
ko gre vojska sred svojega delova-
MIA IA razdruzevtnjem. osamota-
revanjem in skazo posameznikov.
prvotnih skupin, hord in narodov.
VoJska ie predstavnica brutal
ne borbe (preoStanek diviaSkega
zivljenja) med narodi. kot mort
tev cloveka : clovckom.
Delo pa nasprotno. predstavlia
Skup ljudij, narodov, druzecih Sc
Y Svrho skupne borbe prot yuma
njim prirodnim SLAM kroti Jill
pretvarja prosper ljudstva.
tn vidimo. zakai gre reka ljud-
Ske civilizacije-pa mai Sc karkoli
govori ali vrSi - k delu i'm ne k
vojSki. Tudi tn vidimo. zakaj ic
vsaka politika. katere namen ie
ohraniti in pokrepiti princip vol
Ske (bodisi ma bojnem polju. ho-
dist pri csvojevanju kolonii. boz
dist kronicne vojSke. bod s. stay
ha %voiaSnic i'm oboroieuie. : timcr
narodi krvave) - politika. ki je
naproStna neodvratnim p~rirodnim
zakonom ljudSkega razvoia.
Glei. zakai Sc jc mogla burloa-
ziia ukoreniti in dobiti ,vetovno
goSpodarsko i'm politicko uadvla.
do. PoStavila je namrec proti sre-
d~njeveSki militaristitni in feudal-
nj %civilizaciji priucip i'm moe della
trgovini in induStriji. Iii So jc
zlaSti kraSno razvila 2 uporabo
parnih strojev. Danes pa je ia
burzoaziia Y padu. kajti hotet uni,
titi "notranje sovraznike''. poSta-
ia m%ilitaristi6na. zanikaioc sam tc-
nell svoje mirotvorne Industrial
ne civilizacije.
III gleJ! LakaJ Je NZulgnl so
eializem. tako protimilitaristicen
tot - neprtnaslSvo -ro+Izi Sc 20
stavlja proti vojski in p%ovznaSa
delo. Socialism postaja V imenu
della n gibcno vreteno lj,ydSkega
%napredka. katero je vrtela burzo-
azija prot srednjeveSkemu feuda.
dalizmu in ga sedaj opuStila IL
polnuioc oni tako potrebni zgodo.
vinSki cikel. XII gre cd ranega svi.
Ia do solndnega zapada.
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15
WOMAN ABOUT TOWN
FRALTIES AND FoIBLES OF HER SEX

and pity IS akin 20 love- The association
Of ideas was so clear that one couldn't
forget. and still I've forgotten The only
two class mates I've met for years have
forgotten more OE the chain than 7 have.
I've actually lain awake nights trying to
piece II out but whaI d tale is. or what
IL is that's pity are things I'm sure III
never. recall
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15
HOW SHOULD A LAWYER PROPOSE TO A GIRL?

The following has been suggested as
a good form for a lawyer proposing
marriage:
TO Ann Bright Of Blank, in the county
of Blank. Spinster, Daughter of Edward
Bright Of the same place, Gentleman,
and of Mary, his wife
Madam: Whereas i. the undersigned,
John Smith, am a bachelor. of the age
of twenty-eight years. and am and have
been for three years and upward now
last past in practice as an attorney and
practitioner at law:
And, whereas. the net annual income
and emoluments arising from the prac-
tice of my said profession amount to the
sum Of S1,500 and upward, and in addi-
ton thereto. am possessed OF or other
wise entitled to real and personal prop
erty producing a further net annual in
come Of S1.Oo0 or thereabouts. making to-
gether with the aforesaid professional
income a total income Of $500 or there
abouts:
Ability to Maintain Wife.
And, whereas, having regard to the sew
eral facts hereinbefore recited I, the said
John Smith. am in position TO maintain
and keep a wife, and am desirous to en-
ter the holy state of matrimony:
And, whereas, on divers occasions
and in divers places have observed
the manner. behavior, and demeanor
of you, the said Ana Bright. and ]
have further made or caused to be made
sundry inquiries and investigations con-
cerning the character, disposition, habits,
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

propensities. tastes. likes and dislikes Of
YOU the said Ann Bright. and have
thereby and by other sufficient means
duly satisfied myself that you, the said
Ann Bright are in all respects a ft
and proper person 20 become the wife
OF me, the said John Smith,
Determined Upon Marriage.
And, whereas, after due and mature
deliberatiOn l have determined to make
unto you the offer hereinafter expressed: /:
Now, in pursuance Of such determina-
ton and for divers good causes me here
unto moving. l. the said John Smith.
do hereby irrevocably Cbut subject, never
theless, TO the stipulation contained in
the final clause hereof offer and tender
unto you. the said Ann Bright, all that
and those my heart, Hand. body, soul
mind, understanding, and affections. to be
held by you to the use OF you, the said
Ann Bright. for and during the term OF
your natural life in case you shall pre-
decease me. or for and during our Joint
life in case shall predecease you.
Seven Days Given Her.
And / hereby promise and declare that
in the event Of you. the said Ann Bright.
intimating TO me in writing or otherwise
within the space of seven days next after
the date upon which this letter shall be
served upon you or left for you at your
last known place Of abode. your accep-
tance Of the cffer hereby made as afore-
said. / will within a reasonable period
thereafter intermarry with you, the said
Ann Bright at such church on. in e,lch
other building as you may select for that
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15
Another Memory Peg, system.


once paid a teacher Of "a memory sys-
TEN s. in order that might have the
names OF the Presidents fixed IN my
mind II took me only one lesson 10
learn them, because as the teacher. said.
was very quick at gTaSpirg the associa-
ton idea. TO remember the frs Presi-
dent you would naturally think Of some
thing that in your experience came first
This called Up Monday which. while not
technically the first day OF the week. is
the first work DAY. Il is also wash day.
and when you've said 90 yourself The
first work day is washing day" you have
Washington on the tsp. Of your tongue.
After that. knowing the first President,
YOU associate him with the idea Of a man,
and you say to yourself Whose was the
first wash day in history" and involun-
tarily you reply. Adams" And after
you've realized that Adam had wash
days. you ask yourself what else he had.
re had a son I can't recall how the
Jeffer got into the chain. but il came in
quite naturally. and from that point on
the memory teacher led me through the
list so easily and gently that I scarcely
noticed I was giving Up 81 II was a
wonderful system. and all my life 1 shall
remember the first two Presidents As
% the others. I can look them I'D from
time 20 time when necessary. It is not
tie fault Of the system that I've forgot
ten them. Perhaps 1 ought 10 have taken
more lessons in Il, bat a-thIrst as 7 have
always been for knowledge. Presidents at
81 a head are rather high.
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

that matrlmony is running along on oiled
wheels that you hear creak and a spoke
falls out It's just when you reach the
point where you think you can safely
pack up and 20 on your SUMMER vacation
and leave your husband alone that you
suddenly find a spangled slipper IN his
valise or pink note in his pockets. Il
was just when / had convinced myself
that YOU were impervi0us and unimpTes-
sionable and could be trusted as far as
Japan or the antipOdes that / found YOU
couldn't be trusted in dim corner
That's it, declared the Mere Man.
desperately. "a dim corner is a whole lot
more dangerous than the antipodes. And
yet you VIII go and leave me for two
hours on a divan with the prettiest girl
IN the room and come back and blame
me for what I did
For what you didn't do, Mr.. Porter"
corrected the Bachelor Girl. but would
have done if I hadn't interrupted"
mo wonder that girl felt sOrry for
me-" exclaimed the Mere Man. with a
sigh Of desperation.
Sorry for you?''
For being in love with you"
oh. you told her that2"
Yes and how often we disagreed"
WHAT
And how cold and unsympathetic-"
HOY dared you
And how many times you had refused
me-"
OH The Bachelor Girl smiled de-
risiveiy- And 1 suppose she told you
that YOU were lucky"
No sighed the Mere Man: only that
! was foolish"
And that I was cold and calculating
and unworthy
NO interrupted the Mere Man; only
that YOU were foolish, too"
"What21
'TO refuse"
Really"
To refuse such a ch-"
Bobby Porter"
TO refuse such perfect devotion" fin
ished the Mere Man. with hasty impro-
Visation
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15
BACHELOR GIRL CHAT
BREAKING INTO MATRIMONY

/ Bachelor Girl, with a sigh He always
can find a grievance against his wife for
something. if it's only for having married
him and taken him from his bacnelor fiat
and deprived him OF his freedom and
I doubled his expenses"
"Wen. isn't that enough?' demanded
the Mere Man. Indignantly Wouldn't il
give even "A hyena grievance to be rob-
bed of his freedom and kept in a cage
and made TO sit Up and beg for his meals
and broken TO harness"
And breaking a man into matrimony.' -
rejoined the Bachelor Girl with a wave
OF her hand, lis just like tanning wild
animal straight from the jungle He may
! appreciate a good home and three meals
a day and a comfortable corner by the
| fire. but he never gets over that restless
/ feeling. that longing TO roam and To prowl
about nights. You never can tell when
! the instinct will break out. and when you
VIII wake up in the morning 20 find him
gone-like the family cat. It's the very
husband who has ambled along quietly in
the beaten path through years and years
/ of dOmesticty-'
And learned to eat out of your hand, -
broke in lie Mere Man. "and to come
when you whistle and lie low when you
frown and fetch and carry and stand on
his hind legs"
Exactly agreed the Bachelor Girl.
It's the man who never has thought Of
tasting the spice in lifes pudding who
suddenly turns against the matrimonial
diet OF bread and milk and bursts the
bonds to run off with his stenOgrapher or
a chorus girl It's the husband who is
most easily broken to harness. who is
most certain 20 break out of II sooner or
later
And TO shatter the dashboard and
overturn the whole social scheme and
leave the family in a muddled heap of
surprise. when he does slip away" added
the Mere Man, with 4 laugh while the
chap who has gone the pace In his pre-
matrimonial days and knows what wild
oats taste like and has baked like
broncho at being bridled and saddled. will
calm down, once he has been mastered.
and trOt along like old Dobbin for the
rest of his days. 7 saw sad sight like
that yesterday" he finished. with a sigh.
"A-what. Mr.. Porter?"
"Oh. a chap who was once the ladies'
delight but now is growing bald and
smokes a pipe and keeps his baby's pic
ture on his desk" explained the Mere
Man. regretfully. And to think" he
added. with a reminiscent sigh, what
an infinite variety that mans life once
was."
That's precisely why he isn't likely TO
tire of monotony," rejoined the Bachelor
Girl. IT'S the man who never has rung
the changes on love before marriage who
is most apt TO pine for change after
ward. It's the one who never has gore
the pace who suddenly rebels at being
put through his PAGES. It's the little Sun
day school superintendent who never has
been a minute late to dinner. nor missed
a morning service. and who kisses his
wife by the clock and keeps his emotions
under lock and key, who suddenly alb
seconds with the cook or the pretty choir
singer and the firms money. It's the
husband you think you can trust at long
distance who gives you the shortest no.
tice and goes the farthest; it's the man
who never has known what variety is
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

interrupted the Bachelor Girl sarcastiCal-
ly 1T never by any chance has a hump
OF frcckles or can be seen in a dowdy
frock. It's the one thing that wife has
10 fear and that man always can find
where you lest expect II and"
"Oh. don't know. broke in the Mere
Man. I've found a lot Of sympathy
right in good society
''Where?"
AT pink teas explained the Mere
Man. "and coulIions. Nice girls. who felt
sorry for me when ! got engaged 10 one
Of their chums. and sweet little things
who pltied me for having TO dance so
often with other sweet little things and
tender hearts that bled for me because /
felt tender-hearted toward other"
And l don't suppose you ever led them
on. interrupted the Bachelor Girl. synic-
ally. setting down her teacup with a
little clatter, by assuming woe-begone
attitude or by any of those touching little
mnuendoes or those pitifu appeals that
a man in search of sympathy always ap-
plies just In the right place."
You seem 10 know all about H." re-
marked the Mere Man, briefly as ne lit
a fresh cigarette.
L don't know anything" sighed the
Bachelor Girl, hopelessiy. Il wouldn't
even know how Go hold husband IL I
had one. II ! followed him about and
kept Juggling his elbow he'd get bored.
and If / let him go and didn't bother
about him he'd get lonely: and whichever
he did. he'd go hunting for sympathy"
And the situation would present it
self. finished the Mere Man.
In a pink hat and open-work stock
ings and a Bernhardt veil added the
Bachelor Girl. contemptpously. That's
the trouble. A wife never can ten Just
when the situation and the woman viii
present themselves. It's always when
she has settled down 70 the conclusion
that her husband is made OF adamant
and can be trusted at long distance and
taken of his leading strings that he turns
around, cut the traces and skaters all
her theories. It's just when you think
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

Il sha'n't introduce you TO any more
nice girls remarked the Bachelor Girl.
as she filled the Mere Mans teacup and
held lump Of sugar above it.
What have L done?" inquired the Mere
Man. regarding the blue ribbons above
her elbows with satisfaction he tried to
conceal by a hurt expression.
1T isn't what you have done" returned
the Bachelor Girl dropping the sugar into
the cup with little splash, but what
you were trying 10 do. You had hold Of
her hand and were almost
L WASN'T iuterprosed the Mere Man,
desperately.
We'll. il looked that way declared the
Bachelor Girl with shrug Of her white
shoulders. And she added with a re-
proachful sigh, i thought I could trust
you
"why?" demanded the Mere Man. in an
offended tone. I'm not 40 Old"
You're not married, Mr. Porter" re-
piled the Bachelor Girl irrelevantly
No" sighed the Mere Man, but
Nor even engaged" pursued the Bach
elor Girl; and since there is no reason
why you should behave, or be good, or be
faithful. ono would suppose you might
be
DO you mean to say" demanded the
Mere Man, sitting uD suddenly and put
ting down his uutasted tea that if l
were your-were anybody's husband-you
wouldn't trust me not to hirt with 9TH
err"
"Oh, dear. no." protested the Bachelor
Girl. filling her cup and setting down the
teapot with a little thump. Il only mean
10 say that it's usually forbidden fruit
and the things he ought not TO do that
man can't resist The very fact that he
has a perfect right TO flirt with woman
seems TO take all the edge Off the game
for him. It's almost as difficult 10 entice
a single man into a Irritation nowadays
as il is TO keep a married man out OF one.
He doesn't seem to discover how attrac-
tive women in general are until he is tied
To one woman in particular. The very
girl he would dodge and fly from and
Scoff at before he is married. he will sue
cumb 10 Ike a rose TO the sea or an
icicle to the fire afterward. st. Anthony
single could be trusted 10 resist all the
temptations of Beelzebub. but il he had
been married he couldn't have been trust
ed twice around a steamer deck with a
pretty woman on moonlight night"
Twice around steamer deck" re-
marked the Mere Man. thoughtfully sip
ping his tea. is pretty far-On a moon
light night
ITS too far 10 trust husband" agreed
the Bachelor Girl, crossing her blue satin
slippers on the brass fender and stirring
her tea renectively. IT'S the long dis
tance Of faith"
Would you mind telling me-" began
the Mere Man. humbly. what is the av-
can be
About a quarter Of an inch" inter
rupted the Bachelor Girl succinctly. If
he's bored, or i'll, or lonesome. or In need
OF sympathy, and around the world If he
isn't"
But a married man always needs SYM
pathy." protested the Mere Man, with a
wave Of bis teaspoon.
He always thinks he does, agreed the
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

Ike who wearies Of monotony and goes
about looking for change-and sympa-
thy"
And who always can find IT," appended
the Mere Man, nonchalantly blowing a
smoke ring.
Why do you say that?" The Bachelor
Girls blue satin heels dropped FROM the
fender with a sharp little click
Because every woman is willing TO
sympathize with a man for being mar
r!ed to anybody but herself" returned
the Mere Man. "A married man who
wants 10 fiirt with a girl has only to be
gin by telling her what a trying disposi-
ton his wife has, and how UncOngenial
and sympathetic and
"Yes, cried the Bachelor Girl. that's
the way they always do begin"
Because they know II win work" re-
Joined the Mere Man. smiling 10 himself
II isn't the man himself that interests
girl half so much as the sport OK cutting
out some other woman"
And il isn't the girl herself that in
terests a man. rctOrted the Bachelor
Girl. half so much as the-the situation
A woman can keep her husband true TO
her in the face of a hundred houris. Just
so long as he doesn't meet the situation"
"1Vhat?'
80 long as ne Is not bored. or blue, or
sick or unsuccessful, or lonely: SO Ions,
as she can keep him busy and interested
and occupied and cheerful; so long as he
has no time 10 look FOR distraction or va
riety or amusement; so long as ne can't
feel the tug Of the string she's got tied
10 him; SO far as ne thinks he has per
feet right 10 so. You can trust a hus-
band round the world il he has his head
fun OF business and his hands fun Of
dollars; but you can't trust him FIVE min
utes alone with trained nurse when he
is weak and i'll and idle and in need Of
sympathy
Il don't see why you are so down on
sympathy objected the Mere Man, peev-
ishly. It's a great comfort
And it always wears ruffied petticoats
and big hat and violets, and manicures
its finger nails and powders its nose,
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15

purpose. and viii at all times thereafter
during our joint lives at my own expense
in all things maintain and keep you. the
said Ann Bright. as my lawful wife
Provided, always. and the offer here
by made as aforesaid is upon the ex-
press condition that II you. the said
Ann Bright. shall not within the space
OF seven days after the service or de
livery of this letter as aforesaid inti-
mate by writing or otherwise your ac-
ceptance OF the said offer, the same offer
snail thereupon be absolutely null and
void. anything herein contained 20 the
contrary Notwithstanding.
IN witness whereof, / have hereUnto
set my hand. designated myself as
Your humble servant.
JOHN SMITH
The Washington herald., 1908-03-15
y SMITH.
Facing the Enemy.

From the New York Herald
Two veterans Of the civil war were in
the habit of 'jollying" each other IN re-
gard 70 lack of valor on the field OF
battle
Why" said the one, ''at the very first
engagement, when the order was given
70 retreat, you we're so scared that you
threw down your arms and ran for dear
life"
Nonsense" replied the other THAT
Was the time got the three flesh wounds
IN the chest. II I'd been running away,
as you claim, | would have been shot in
the back"
"oh, no. you wouldn't" returned his
friend. The reason you got shot in the
chest was because you took 20 the river
and were trying to get away in a row.
boat"