Jefferson jimplecute. (Jefferson, Tex.) 1907-1926, 1908-11-06
Loves Vibronleter.


- ciation.l
II fear, professor" she said, toying
with her fan, that If should marry
you you would be constantly referring
everything to scientific cause. If, for
instance, you were so devoid of feel
ing as to forget to give me even
flower on the anniversary Of our wed
ding you would excuse yourself on the
ground that the Photographic impress
sion on your brain had not been suf-
hciently strong, whereas your action
would be-well, it would be just hor-
rid"
mo; l should say that mental ac-
tivity in another direction blurred the
picture"
(Which would still be horrid. You
are so STEPPED in materialism that all
sentiment has gone out Of you"
Sentiment! You mean sentimental
ism. And what is sentimentalism?
Manufactured emotion. 1 say manu-
featured emotion, for it surely is not
natural, like anger, fear, pity. And
how many couples does it tie up in
matrimonial siains who are not fitted
for each othera With what result?
Misery anaoree."
.Ife7Ayou don't believe in marriage
for love5gou would scorn those hap
by mepdents of lovers in the moon
light, samong flowers, listening together
to}strains of sweet music"
sWhy not say with Shakespeare, TO
the lascivious pleasing of a lutte? I
grant you that all these things induce
passion, but is mere passion suf-
ficient reason for marriage?"
"Of course not!' Indignantly.
'The scientist. where he reaches a
foundation for his faith, stands on
bedrock. There Is where stand in
the matter Of love. We have attained
to knowledge of what love is. We
may not always be able to determine
If 1t exists between two people in a
sufficient degree to warrant marriage,
but l believe the day will come when
It will be measured to scale, just as
we measure our weight, temperature,
pulse"
I'm other words, trained nurse puts
love thermometer on our hearts and
reads zero, temperate, grand passion,
as the case may be. People who SUBJ
NIT to such absurdity are indeed fit to
be under the care of q nurse. A luna
tic asylum is the proper place for
them"
Suppose in 200 marriages 100 Of the
couples are brought together by your
moonlight, flowers, music and such
like; the other hundred by a-well, call
1t vibrometer. In the first hundred
cases we cannot expect all to turn out
happily. Let us assume that sixty are
happy, thirty unhappy and ten are di-
vorced. Now, If every case pronounced
by the vibrometer to be genuine love
say, 95 per cent, to allow for errors
turns out happily if the amatory oscil-
lations continue through long life,
would you admit the scientific method
to be the better?"
"Oh, certainly! And If you should
pump gas into me from one Of your
abominable machines that would make
me soar in the sky l would admit that
you are conjurer."
"Now, 1 have said that we know
what love is. 1t has been defined by
Dr. Scheibler Of the Berlin Institute
of Electro Therapeutics thus: The o.
citations in the interior Of a PERSONS
body, as may be seen in the case of
Migratory attraction, are in harmony
that is to say, they are at the first
movement in complete accordance with
the oscillations in the interior Of some
other persons body"
Oscillations! That's a mans love.
And the more women between which
he may oscillate the better, suppose -
"Please don't Interrupt 1T is, Of
course, necessary that t. reaetionary
sentiment -
Sentiment? You mean clockwork.' ~
-"in the case of the two sub
jects' -
"Automatons."
-" should be Of an agreeable ma
ture' -
"a grin painted on their faces"
-" since the two vibrations facilitate
the movement Of all the atoms which
In this way accumulate and emit their
rays without disturbing the diffu-
sion -
II suppose each heart is lighted tai,
low candle?'
-" this it is which causes the senti-
ment known as sympathy
Machine sympathy. I'd stick pin
In man who would offer me such
sympathy"
land which subsequently causes
love-"
"Oh, heavens! And this is love! Then
1 suppose cotton mills where shuttles
are continually vibrating are brimful
Of romances. And think Of the cases
in watchmakers' shops where the
watches all hang together to be regu,
lated. How they must vibrate for one
another! And is this the kind Of love
you are offering me?"
"My love for you Is not thing to
offer. 1t can only exist with yours"
do bring the vibrometer and let US
see whether we are lovers"
"There is yet no such instrument
The nearest we can get to it is by the
touch" taking her hand. DO you fee
! a thrill? That's vibration in unison
This pressing my lips on yours is q
more sensitive test"
81 think 1 do feel it just little"
Perhaps cardiac juxtaposition"
| "a what?'
Il will illustrate. I fold you in my
arms so that your heart will beat
against mine. Thus"
"Oh, professor, the three tests to-
gether are
"In you reactionary vibratory senti
ment."
II don't care what you call It. It's
Just too nice for anything"
F. A. mitchell.
Foley's Honey any Tar clears the al
passages, stops the irritation in tn
throat, soothes the intiamed membran
and the most obstinate cough disap